Noises are what does it for me. I have unpleasant flashbacks a lot, but those are usually from me spiraling; meanwhile, random noises will make me turn into some fucking 'Nam vet. I have a couple moid friends who my best friend and I play Minecraft together with (two moids we're both close with, one who's her boyfriend) and one of them sighed with a certain intonation and I freaked out. I threw up on my carpet a week or so ago because my body hates me and makes mental issues physical.
I also have started pissing myself in my sleep after these "episodes" (I don't know what else to call them) and it is making me want to kill myself. While I drink a lot, this has happened so many times when I'm sober and actively thinking about it before going to bed that I do believe it has to be from it. What the fuck? Why couldn't I have been born a rock or something in a rock-birth? Geopregnancy? I barely go outside anymore since he's a neighbor. My life is pathetic.
>>579976I have/am. It's really scary to work in public-service jobs when you've been through this stuff. I don't know if it would work for you/ others, but what helped me was just thinking of everyone I interacted with before that; older women, bratty teenagers, etc. Before my assault, I would always imagine what their lives were like/what they did in their days/etc., and that helped me a lot in my job. While I was, and still am, scared he'd/he'll show up, remembering that I get random ass people helps to remind myself that not everyone will be him.