>>470966Nona, when I was a teenager I also had an edgy sense of humor, in some cases even without realizing it.
I once made a "joke" in front of two of my then-friends, a joke which could've been interpreted as racist, or as dumb and insensitive for other reasons. I wasn't trying to be offensive in the least, and I'm not racist nor did I ever joke about groups of people being inferior or anything like that (not even when I was addicted to 4chan), but I was just surprised, and slightly amused because I was retarded and didn't consider that step-parents and adoption are a thing, that the father of a friend of ours looked completely different from him. I pointed out the difference while laughing, which was obviously very inappropriate, and one of my friends told me, in a very annoyed voice, "shut up" (she had never talked to me or anyone like that). I guess it was deserved, but it hurt a lot, it actually still hurts. It took a while to accept it, because that response hurt, but now I know that I had a retard moment and paid the price for it.
Sometimes I still laugh for dumb reasons, but never out of malice, it's just that I find some simple things (like accents, I love hearing different accents and I think the differences between them are fun) amusing for some reason. I wish I stopped doing that because it has led to some embarrassing and awkward situations where I think I've unintentionally hurt someone, in retrospect. Maybe I do have a little bit of autism, I don't know. Or, maybe the problem is that I spent too much time online instead of socializing with other people in real life, especially girls, and that's why my reaction to some things is to find it funny where more normal people would've learned to react differently, since I learned to see things through the lens of very specific internet humor. Either way, I still struggle to not be weird in front of others from time to time.