All my grandparents died very recently in short succession and it's such a bizarre, melancholy feeling.
I loved my paternal grandparents and I loved visiting them/staying at their family house as a child, now the house has been sold and walking past it whenever I visit my hometown makes me feel so weird. I have this urge to walk into the yard and say hello but then I remember nobody I know lives there anymore. My father and my aunt haven't been on speaking terms since they died and nobody wants to tell me why.
My mom's eyes well up every time I mention my maternal grandma, the two of them were really close since my grandpa died when mom was 7 and was very physically abusive
Now my mom is all alone and I can see she's taking it very hard, and I live abroad so both my parents are alone with nobody else to talk to except some friends here and there, plus the corona situation is really bad where they live and they're in their 60s so I'm scared for them a lot but can't visit until the epidemic is over.
I don't care much about getting older, even my parents never mention missing their youth much, my dad always says "I wish I were 35 again, back then I still had prospects to do new things and now I'm a tired pensioner and there's nothing for me to do", neither of them miss their 20s but their 30s. I just want them to live long and be healthy for as long as possible, I can't stand the thought of them getting sick and slowly wasting away far away from me, or dying suddenly and leaving me all alone. They're huge tinfoil retards who don't know how to take care of themselves but I love them and I'm so scared of them dying.
They're all I have in life, I come from a third world shithole, was born into a poor family with no political connections and had to move abroad to find work so I could have some savings to take care of them when they're older and so my mom can renovate her bathroom like she's been wanting to for 10 years. Just thinking about losing my parents makes me have a panic attack, I'd miss them so much I don't know what I would do. They've given me everything.
Sorry for the massive post, I just had to get this out of my system.