>>332796What would be the consequences of you coming out? Is it dangerous? Is your culture very family-oriented? I have felt similarly in the past but have weighed the pros and cons and the answer for me is going to be coming out.
I was considering just dating men to appease my mother, but unfortunately (as I think I've documented in this thread kek) I don't actually like men in real life. My mother is one of the most important people in my life, we've survived traumas together and as an only child she was my first and closest friend. She has supported me through so much and I've been her sole confidant for my whole life. She is also very homophobic.
Recently, or within the past couple of years, I found a woman I like a lot while also coming to terms with all of this. When it comes down to it I realized a life partner would make my life more full for far longer, especially if she were the right person. Plus I'm an adult, and soon enough will be in complete control of myself and my future. There's a part of me still hoping my mom will come around but at night I know this isn't likely and I sometimes find myself sobbing about it. So many years of love and bonding gone forever, but when she goes on homophobic rants I'm reminded of what will be more fulfilling.
I also told some of my friends and it gave me a taste of what being out is like. It's a huge relief and also nice to have a support system when the time comes. So I'll choose what makes me happiest, ultimately.
For now I'm waiting until I have a bonafide girlfriend, but this has been my thought process. Sharing partially for any anon's sake but also just to express what's inside my head right now. Any nonas in physical danger should stay safe though.