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File: 1496410643937.jpg (84.85 KB, 600x400, loser ex stories.jpg)

No. 62165[Reply]

Post loser ex-boyfriend (or ex-gf for gayfags) stories here.

>Online neckbeards you met in chatrooms at 15, that one autist you depression-dated when you had no self esteem and then couldn't shake off, the lanklet dude who played xbox all day and couldn't hold down a job and forgot your birthday. Vent or share funny stories ITT!
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No. 115867

I think she's saying that the person you choose to date is reflective of your mental state. She probably felt like she deserved someone that bad and she got it. It's not her fault obviously but people don't put up with things they feel they don't deserve.

No. 115883

File: 1559243927605.gif (240.7 KB, 352x284, tenor.gif)

I'm the 27y/o bf anon you're replying to. You're right in that I sought out a terrible person because I thought I was a terrible person, but really no, we were nothing alike. I think you underestimate how self-loathing and self-destructive I was as a teenager. I'm not trying to make myself look like a victim, I never indicate that in my greentext. If I did view myself that way, I would have said he preyed on me, and I felt threatened to stay with him, but truthfully I stayed because I didn't know where else to get positive attention. That being said, he shouldn't have had sex with a 16 year old and took her money for alcohol.

It makes sense because of previous traumas mentally illness I just wanted my life to end and might as well go see this scary internet man who will probably kill me. Yes I walked into hell on purpose, but he should have never let me in the first place. I place blame on both parties. Honestly it took a lot of therapy to realize that it wasn't 100% my fault, so I have to just disagree with you that a 16 year old girl and a 27 year old man were both equally bad.

I'm in my 20s now, I got my GED, I saved enough money to move across the country and peruse the career I want. I am now on good terms with my mom and we went to therapy together. 16 year old me is an alien to me and I just wanted to semi-objectively vent about my loser ex-boyfriend without injecting too much narrative.

No. 115893

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Actual question

If you date many autistic guys are you autistic?

No. 115906

I'm happy for you anon, that sounds inspiring. You don't need to justify yourself to that other anon or anyone who thinks a grown ass man isn't fully to blame for their actions because a child made them do it or whatever.
It sounds like you're doing really well, and I hope that you have a happy life.

No. 116020

No, but you probably have a saviour complex.

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No. 82884[Reply]

Post any looks from minimalist to avant garde you think are cute or interesting.
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No. 115702

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No. 115715

Double request

No. 115718

omg! so pretty

No. 115861

I can deal with all the wacky painted stuff that would look terrible from any other angle, but there's no way she can even blink properly with those gems stuck to her face. I know it's just a fashion concept but anything too uncomfortable or temporary breaks the immersion for me too much, kind of like those glossy eye looks that would dissipate after one blink or when people were putting colour onto their eyeballs

No. 116857

Who is this? She's gorgeous.

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No. 102943[Reply]

No I am not a troll. I am 100% serious. I am tired of dating ugly shitty guys, and I want to date a perfect rich handsome guy. In this thread we discuss how to achieve said thingy. Whether it is improving yourself to climb up the league, or simply going to certain events/places. How does one acquire a rich handsome man?
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No. 114436

No I was asking tips. I am busy losing weight and I lost a lot but that was for myself. I do take care of my hair problems just not my vegene hair and leg hair because i wear long sleeves 24/7. Acne just is too much because I should apply this cream every fucking day from top to bottom, on my entire fucking body every fucking day and I cannot miss a single day or it comes back, and showering does not help and I already do shower.
You're jumping at me with assumptions. Even if I didn't do all of that, I just wondered what I should do in general, hence why I didn't mention I was ugly and autistic, because I wanted to see the points of what you all are assuming is a girl who is normal.

In all honesty I can still wish for it you know? I mean I am fully aware I cannot get a normal guy either but you seemed to miss that, just like you assumed I don't take care of myself as much as I can.
Another assumption. And no acne is too much work lol, I don't even have a lot on my face. Just my chin/jaws and wherever hair grows.
My personality is apparently set according to some sources and I'm weird/shy so I cannot change it, sorry. But I do have the right to ask as I said, knowing I'll die as a virgin, loveless.

No. 114480

just go on a sugar baby site. you'll probably get an ugly/old dude but they have much lower standards (you should still be skinny/wear makeup and do your hair though) and some of them don't even want to fuck you, they just want younger arm candy to take places.

No. 114482

They arent handsome chads though.

No. 115626

I'm covered in tattoos and 24, is finding a rich chad bf off the table for me? not the end of the world bc i have my own career and im only attracted to alt guys anyway, im just wondering if it's even an option for me. Chads never seem look me over

No. 115651

No. Some guys dig more alternative girls. Are the tattoos trashy or well done?

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No. 72052[Reply]

Not trying to force any muh tradwomyn stuff onto anybody, but does anyone else genuinely enjoy home care/cleaning, etc? We can also discuss interior design!

I'm not a mom yet, but I've been going to this lady's site for a few years now because I enjoy her cleaning recipes: https://wellnessmama.com/?s=cleaning

The recipe section leaves much to be desired, but her makeup recipes also aren't too bad. Not even gonna venture making that foundation though.

I'm very fond of those dryer satchels that can be made by sewing some fresh lavender into the pouch. Its a nice alternative to dryer sheets. I also have experimented cleaning with a concoction of apple cider vinegar and tea tree oil. I've found that lemon juice/oil does cut through grease and lavender oil is potent enough to kill staph. Plus, its a great antibacterial and its even used in hospitals to this day. I began to use natural cleaners after I had a bad reaction to bleach fumes.

Also, do you prefer incense or candles?
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No. 115345

Add tea tree oil to your machine and let it run empty.

Wash your stuff with a few drops afterwards

I have a cat and it’s the only way to get smell out

No. 115370

Mildew is very well possible but if so it’s coming from my walls not my washing machine.
Ugh… welp. Thank you.

Thanks, I’ll try that

No. 115585

Anyone here into "natural" or non-toxic cleaning? I made my first vinegar spray and actually really like it, I'm using it to clean the faucets, sinks, countertops. It helps with the hard water stains on the faucets. I used 2 parts white vinegar to 1 part water and added orange essential oil. It does smell a bit vinegary but the citrus seems to mask it pretty well. I still use "toxic" or abrasive cleaners too as needed, I just like making my own cleaners or using ones with few ingredients. Bleach is a godsend as far as harsh stuff goes. Back on non-toxic, does anyone use Castile soap? I'm curious about it but wasn't sure how well it works.
I also tried a stain remover made from hydrogen peroxide, dish soap, and baking soda, and it worked pretty well on old perspiration stains! If anyone is interested I'll look for the link to the recipe I used. I just like feeling a bit more self-sustainable or environmentally friendly using stuff that's easy to manufacture.

No. 115586

sage for samefag but I forgot about the word filter on toxic, making me lol

No. 115601

Well it's good you wash the oil out. Tea tree oil can be toxic to pets.

"Tea tree oil contains various types of chemicals called terpenes. These are the chemicals that make the oil effective against bacteria and fungi. They are also the toxic agent. Terpenes are rapidly absorbed into the body whether taken orally or on the skin. This means topical application of concentrated oil can result in the same toxicity as accidental oral ingestion. Given the tendency of pets to groom, especially cats, the toxicity risk of topical applications is amplified."

So uh, just be careful anons out there who want to use the oil but have pets.

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No. 114835[Reply]

What are your thoughts on casual sex?

Personally, I am extremely against it. I think more bad comes from it than good. I don't judge people for doing it, I just think it's a bad idea. I'm not saying you should only be with one person your entire life or you fucked up, I'm just saying that sex with someone you don't know that well or are in a relationship with us a bad idea.
49 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 115511

is casual sex even that satisfying for men? I know they can at least cum, but you can have disappointing orgasms.

No. 115513

When I lived that lifestyle it was obviously part self esteem affirmation and drunken arousal, but I also just enjoyed the stuff that goes alongside one night stands like fake deep conversations in dark empty places and just spending unexpected moments with a stranger. I liked those first minutes of arriving in someone's room and finding that, when you thought they were one kind of person, the things that they had said otherwise. Maybe that is just more self esteem bullshit but I kind of enjoyed the competitive aspect of getting someone you find hot to admit they're interested in you before you say it. I found one night stands much more enjoyable once I learned to confidently say no when I didn't feel it, and leave immediately or kick them out if the guy wasn't respecting that.
Now I'm older I hate people that are trying to manipulate me into sex so I don't think it's something I'll do again, but it fitted into that hipster kid time in my life.

No. 115520

I don't do it but, unlike some anons, I can understand the reasons. I wouldn't say it's only to feel like a bad bitch or to act like men.
After all, orgasm or not, it's a form of intimacy.
I've learnt people need a lot of it. I'm coming from a loving home, but we would rarely express it verbally or physically. So I feel like maybe that's why I don't need intimacy, as long as I know I have loving people in my life and can feel their love in the way of acts etc. But observing some girls I know, they need intimacy to live. They need touch, closeness, they feel miserable without a boyfriend, when they're single they get really touchy-feely with friends, some can't even be alone in a day… So I can somehow understand it. It's just a human need that has to be satisfied. If they can't get a long-time partner, what can they do?
Maybe that's soppy, but I can imagine that some people just want to be held, even for one night

No. 115525

Like any other self-medicating behavior it'll probably just make you feel worse since you'll realize it's just a simulacrum of real affection.
Men can just lie to themselves/others that it's for muh physical pleasure easier for biological/sociological reasons. Interestingly I've noticed that casual sex doesn't really "damage" women like society would have you believe (they are usually already dysfunctional going into it) but I have seen it significantly worsen men by making them more sexist, paranoid about cheating and giving them sexual insecurities. Probably because it's easier for the average men to convince himself it's a good idea and then he'd be even more confused when it makes him feel worse due to social stereotypes. But they have to put on a show that it makes them feel empowered and then women see that facade and believe it and want that for themselves.

No. 115533

I understand where you are coming from, I really do. I have posted here about how I have engaged in casual sex too and realized it wasn't that good and stopped. But this kind of intimacy we crave can't be satisfied with casual sex. It's like putting a band-aid on a broken bone.

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No. 56882[Reply]

This is probably a really stupid question but how do I be more like those girls on Instagram and social media who are just uniform beautiful? Perfect eyebrows and somehow perfect fashion sense, you could even count the whole basic bitch thing but I'm hoping someone knows what I mean. How do I be more like the majority of the girls I see on the street with perfect clothes and hair and bodies?

I'm 22 and feel pretty much like Tomoko Kuroki in comparision. I'm very short and curvy, but my height and baby face make me feel like I stand no chance and I have no clue where to go for makeup or fashion resources that these girls all learn from and perfect.

I really want to finally feel more like a pretty young woman, anyone got any resources or tips?
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No. 57001

makeup tutorials can definitely help with makeup and grooming- just be careful not to go overboard like most beauty gurus.

another thing to remember- pretty much everyone on social media with any sort of following uses editing apps. they don't look like that in real life. no shame in shopping your pics if you want to look that beautiful too (just own up to it of course.)

No. 57019

Aren't oil pulling and body wraps total bullshit? Other than that, good infographic

No. 57039

tomoko koroki isnt curvy…

No. 57093

One thing that makes people look beautiful on the internet is honestly being interesting. I'm not saying "ooh ur inside needs to be beautiful not ur outside" I'm saying, look how much lolcow tears into people who just stare vapidly at their cameras and shoop themselves into aliens. No one envies that.

Find hobbies, if you take a beautiful photo of yourself reading a book, watching the sunset, finishing a bike ride, painting a picture, you will look so much more beautiful than someone who rolls around on the floor trying to find the perfect angle and lighting.
lol i sound like a neckbeard but I'm actually just a woman who went through exactly the kind of painful envy you did. I feel a million times more attractive now that I can do makeup well, bathe regularly (I was gross), have good skin and have lost 20 pounds- but what really made me feel better about myself was finding shit about what I enjoyed and who I was.
I'm an artist and as soon as I put my all into painting, I felt better about myself. I took better care of myself because I had an identity to care about.
Obviously, art's not for everyone, but make sure you've got something you're passionate about OP, otherwise you're decorating an empty shell and that's not exactly motivating.

Also, diverging from that, make sure you have routines(diet/hygine/skincare/exercise). Consistency is the only thing that improves appearance.

No. 115464

what about people who have horrible facial features or bodily features lol makeup can only enhance what you have so are we just hopeless then

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No. 114802[Reply]

I don’t really have a sense of fashion or whatever but I kind of want to get into it and just make myself look good in general.
What tips do you guys recommend for finding a style or aesthetic that suits you.
9 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 114861

People shit on fridge waists in the kpop critical thread but I don’t complain as a “ruler” shaped woman.

Can’t mods just ban accordingly? I really want a Kibbe thread but not full of trad thot bullshit like r/femininenotfeminist.

No. 114884

Kibbe doesn't matter too much but looking at your face and body critically is important. Where does your body get fleshy, where is it slim, where is it wide, tapered, etc? You have to check your proportions and measure things. Both for the face and body, kibbe operates on a yin/yang thing which is basically how bony and angular your face is vs fleshy and rounded. Faces sometimes have masculine bone structure but lots of facial fat or lucky fat distribution to soften it. Likewise you can have very dainty bone structure but no fat to pad it so it looks sharp.

Seeing stuff like this can help you then look at outfits the same way, with your body in mind and not just how the outfit looks in isolation. Generally speaking you wanna accentuate features you like and counter the ones you don't like.

What anon upthread said about probably needing to ditch your favorite aesthetic is correct for most people. There's a slim chance that the insta influencer you follow the style of is the same body and face shape as you. Seek things that flatter you specifically by analyzing shapes and try to find a mid ground between what you like and what flatters you.

Colors based on the seasons system is ok as a starting off point too, though you'll run into the same issue of the horoscope not completely describing you. All these systems are there to get you a starting idea by giving you some theory. You need to put in the work to actually become able to see people's shapes.

No. 114887

I actually think most insta-fluencers look pretty bad. We only perceive them as looking good because they're presented well, not because their outfits actually really suit them or are particularly nice. Most of it is fast fashion crap that looks ridiculous on 99% of people, or is really generic.

I actually found Kibbe pretty helpful. A lot of styling tips focus on trying to make everyone look the same, but Kibbe encourages flattering the shape you actually are. Only annoying thing is actually trying to find clothes that suit you, because women's clothes shops only ever sell what's currently trendy.

No. 114888

On the topic of seasonal colours, I've found that Merriam Style's artistic license system can be a lot clearer than the twelve season system, since it's entirely focused on skin and only has four categories.

No. 115391

I like the idea of focusing on skin because you can totally change your hair color and clothes. Skin can't change and flattering it should be the #1 priority. I've seen so many people wearing colors that completely clash with their skintone. Warm vs cool isn't extremely relevant outside of makeup but the muted vs bright color thing is really important all around.

This YTer's voice is so calming

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No. 108748[Reply]

I have a question regarding IUDs. I've been on the pill since early 2017 and I get pretty bad side effects. My breasts swell up (they become REALLY painful) and I get extremely nauseous. I haven't been off the pill since 2017 and the symptoms haven't disappeared. I'm honestly sick of it and decided to get an IUD. Have any of you had experiences with IUDs? I am not sure whether to get the hormonal or non-hormonal one. I absolutely hate and almost can't stand the side effects of hormonal birth control, but I get very painful periods and I heard that the copper IUD makes them 10x worse. ;-;
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No. 114796

Give it some more time. Your hormones are going to go a little crazy in the beginning because your body is adjusting. This causes all sorts of things, mood swings especially, which definitely contribute to low libido and what I call "pushing away".

>>114789 is right. You should see how your first cycle goes and if it is truly insufferable by your second cycle, give your gyno a call.

There are all sorts of doses and bc is not a "one-size-fits-all" thing. Just like any other medication you might need to try a few until you find the right fit.

No. 114860

I'm not sure if this is the right thread for this anons, please point me in the direction of another one if so - but does anyone use a menstrual cup here? I just got off Yaz bc I've had some scary experiences with it after being on it for four years and I'll be having proper periods again soon that won't be over in a day and I don't want to waste money and kill the environment with tampons and pads. Experiences, advice?

No. 115312

I started hormonal birth control for the first time two months ago and I swear my breasts have grown like a size or two. It's actually bothering me. Will it go away eventually if I stop taking birth control and workout a bit? Big boobs seriously trigger my body body dysmorphia.

No. 115314

Yes, they’re most likely a temporary change due to water retention. Maybe try drinking green or stinging nettle tea.

No. 115339

they probably will but what >>115314 said isn't the only cause. a more common cause is the additional hormones.

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No. 114816[Reply]

I feel like I’ve always struggled with finding the motivation or discipline to do necessary things unless they are at my doorstep, then I go into overdrive mode.

I can’t even begin to find the motivation to study anymore and I used to go to them gym everyday and now I can barely get myself to go.
How do you guys manage to stay on top of things like hw, exams, routines, health and just looking for opportunities?
I know girls that are always looking for opportunities for scholarships, programs etc but I feel like a baby with it’s head in the sand about to enter a time where you need to be way more responsible.
Do you guys have any tips?

No. 115321

I'm still struggling with that myself.

But I've found that keeping a small schedule works best to prevent inevitable workload that comes from putting things off to the last minute. List at least one thing you have to do for each day of the week. After that's done you're free for the day. List the rest days too that you specifically allow yourself to take care of your mental health, doing whatever makes you feel relaxed. Personally I like to go stare at ducks to nearby pond as watching animals just do their thing is a good reminder that there's more to life than feeling sad and inadequate.

It's tough, but try to be kind to yourself. Some are slower to learn the ropes in adulthood than others and that's okay.

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No. 114987[Reply]

Do it! Positive-self affirmation thread.
11 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

No. 115206

I'm determined to become better and better in my field (2D artist, illustrator), and hopefuly reach my dreams one day.
I may be distant, but I really do care about people and I'm just bad at expressing it.

No. 115209

I've been through a lot and have trouble trusting a lot of people, but it makes me a stronger person who knows how to keep herself safe and see true genuineness in others..

No. 115242

Despite my problems, I'm smart and well-liked. I'm pretty even if sometimes I can't stop nit-picking my face or my body. I'm a better and more healed person than what the people who still blame me and think I could never change. Someday I will do something great, I don't know what, but something.
>>115209 I feel this. I'm glad you've found genuine people, anon, and stay strong.

No. 115300

I'm finally getting help for bpd after years of refusing and lashing out with really toxic behaviour. It's only been a month and already I can feel everything improving, and this wouldn't be happening right now if I hadn't been disciplined enough to recognise that I need medical treatment. Sometimes I chastise myself and convince myself that I'm making it up and that I'm just damaged and worthless, but in moments of clarity like this I'm really proud of myself for taking the first steps towards improving myself. At the core, I did this because I care about myself and don't want to give up. I'm proud of me.

No. 115315

I have slowly managed to undo my emotional numbness towards myself and others around me over the last seven years. Though it was painful to realise I had been unpleasant to socialise with- i.e friendships remaining surface level cause I never asked or told about personal stuff- I put in effort to change myself. Feels nice.

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