/g/ - girl talk

>>513787
My last ex had unmedicated ADHD. I didn’t see the full effects of it at first, because after we met we were in different countries, and he seemed to live a full and interesting life. Then he came back to my country. I’ve never had such whiplash in thinking that I knew somebody:
I came to realise that he was so detached from the real world that I became so tired of telling him ‘no’. No, we can’t just hire a boat and sail down my city’s major river. No, we wouldn’t be able to eventually get married in my city’s most famous landmark. He was unable to do basic chores to the extent that I thought he might be retarded. On the other hand, if it was weaponised incompetence, he came across as so incompetent I lost all attraction to him. He was a master of lovebombing, which initially distracted me from the fact that he had no respect for the fact that I had to work full time and didn’t have the time or energy to cater to his every whim. I was like a shell of myself.
I waited for him to go back to his home country to break up with him. He flipped and sent endless emotionally manipulative messages and voicenotes. I asked for space, which he didn’t respect, and so I blocked him and then he started messaging my family members. According to the latest update from his social media from a friend several months later, he thinks I was cheating on him. They live on their own fucking planet. They don’t see others as complete people, but caricatures of themselves who are good (enabling) or bad (emotionally resilient; self-preserving).
When we got together, this thread was active: >>>/g/381978. Nonas talk about their experience with ADHD moids in it. I wish I'd paid more attention to it.

>>516914
I'm the anon who previously said that dating ADHD moids isn't worth it and this is exactly why (full disclosure I never dated one, but some of my friends have). If you look at typical dating advice forums, even kind of retarded ones like FDS, one of the useful takeaways is 'never date a moid who doesn't actively make your life better than it was when you were single (outside of sex). A lot of women are kind of bad about this because we've been primed from childhood to think that life with 'romance' or a partner is automatically better, but whenever I see a woman in some early relationship stage asking 'ladies, is it worth it to date (X type of man with massive neon red flag above head)' I just automatically think 'no, if you have to ask it isn't.'

The best case with an ADHD moid is that he is self-dx'd retard making excuses for why he can't complete any tasks or goals in school or work. The middle case is he's a semi-normal moid who has talked a therapist into a diagnosis and is going to be an amphetamine addict for the rest of his life as a result. The worst case is that he actually has ADHD, which is a neurodevelopmental disorder that means he's literally been brain damaged in some way from birth, and while neurodivergent women frequently manage to rise above that with self-discipline and empathy for other people, neurodivergent men basically don't, ever. They will never 'get you,' they will act deranged and use their diagnosis as an excuse for lacking ambition and life skills, they will pity themselves when you expect them to rise above their neurological issues the way most women with ADHD/autism are expected to. The other really horrible thing about ADHD moids (highlighted in that thread) is they will be the most porn-addicted coomers alive, 10 times worse than regular coomer men. The only instance in which it makes sense to date an ADHD moid is if you dated him for a year or more before even finding out he has ADHD, he seems normal and together in every way and you just found out he has ADHD by accident. Otherwise literally why would you add that kind of chaos to your life when even mentally 'normal' men are on average so awful to date?

>>516918
I'm the anon you're replying to and couldn't agree more. My ex came along when I was feeling ready to say 'yes' to everything because life had felt quiet for a year and it seemed like a partner was the only thing 'missing'. The fact that he wasn’t from my country was exciting, and he seemed to have a lot of ambition which – in the longterm – would have opened up opportunities for me also. It was only when he was here that I realised I had replaced all his other future plans and he put his education on hold to become a neet hobo in my country.
In hindsight, my life was complete. Steady job, own living space, good friends, hobbies. I’ve done so much reflection since he left, journaled until I can’t anymore, and opened up to friends about the shame I feel for missing the red flags. What comforts me is that I’m invested in my personal growth, whereas I know that he’s still blaming me for everything going wrong and looking for the perfect sex-mother. Whereas I'm content to just get laid every once in a while lmao.
Also I've just realised I completely fucked up replying to >>516187 so I hope she sees all this.

>>516929
>>516914
>>516366
Thank you kind anons, I figured it would be a bad idea. I also think it's not just adhd but also some co-morbidity of a personality disorder going on although I can't tell if the "being affectionate and then go directly to ignoring" is just an adhd trait or something else but this moid is already medicated and he is still showing plenty red flags despite at first treating me really well. Naturally I was hoping it would go back to that state at some point but reading your experiences here I have abandoned all hope. Seems like all they are good for is a situationship and to dump them right after if one is lucky enough not to catch feelings..

>>516929
This isn't the same thing but I have had a close female friend for the last 18 or so years who has ADHD and despite being more tolerable due to being a female friend, I relate to the 'seemed to have a lot of ambition which… would have opened up opportunities for me.' My female ADHD friend was constantly pitching projects to me which sounded ambitious and vaguely aligned with my pre-existing career/hobby goals and I kept pouring effort and energy into making them happen while she would eventually drop them and get defensive about the fact I was still talking about them. I can't imagine how much worse it would be with a moid who lacks the empathy and theory of mind to even realize that he is putting your life on hold for his fleeting, fake ambitions about 'projects' he will never commit to; at least my female ADHD friend felt sorry when she dropped the ball and actively apologized for stringing me along.

>I had replaced all his other future plans and he put his education on hold to become a neet hobo in my country.
This is such a common story from my friends who have dated ADHD moids it's not even funny. It's like they can only focus on one thing at a time so if they seem to be focusing on your relationship you can bet the futures of your unborn grandchildren on the fact he is definitely letting every other aspect of his life lapse and depending on him to bail you out if he's acting attentive to you. I had extremely accomplished, educated, together female friends lose months or years of their lives to these moids who tried to monopolize their energy only to then drop it on them they had no future plans outside of 'depending on the relationship for future happiness.' And like you're saying these were women with their own homes, friends, hobbies, good careers.

>>516933
>medicated and he is still showing plenty red flags
Could be comorbidities, could be that the ADHD diagnosis is a convenient cover for a cluster B personality disorder too. A man going straight from extremely affectionate directly to ignoring sounds kind of par for the course for ADHD (not caring unless something is the most amusing thing right in front of them) but it could also be something like BPD or NPD too. If he's alrPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

>>513234
Have you been homeschooled?

I really wish I had a group of female friends, or at least more girl friends, however I feel so uncomfortable around most of them. I feel like they low-key dislike me, and I just can't be myself with them. I've been wondering if I'm autistic since it has only been with few clearly weird girls that I got along.

>>434994

Are you literally me? Because this is the same experience that I'm having right now. I didn't have a lot of irls growing up and not a lot of friends except online since I was like 12 and up until recently I kinda have more irl friends now (not a lot but still at least people to hang out with) but yeah explaining how I grew up, mentioning being a shut in neet and how it took me until I was like 23 to socialize normally is hard for people to understand or relate. The more I do socialize with normies though the more I realize I like that I enjoy my own company more but I wish I had more female friends who are socially stupid like me irl.

>>513230
i don't mind being banned for replying. do you know that women can actually talk in the real world and that most have shitty attitudes about other women? i don't feel bad for pushing her and for wanting my childhood friend to stop saying that teen girls are mini adults or that she didn't deserve to get raped and it should've been a whore instead. maybe you're used to being around conservative women who stick their heads in the sand but i don't want someone i'm vulnerable with to spout the same unimaginative and self-hating bullshit
>>515301
thank you. it feels like every friendship i've had has some kind of invisible wall that prevents us from being serious. i want to be more honest with people

>>434994
This is me minus a relationship, which frustrates me since I'm the odd one out IRL for that. I feel like you're (general you) kinda screwed if you never got the formative socialization of having childhood or adolescent friends. Even as a wagie that makes decent money instead of a NEET, I never understood how coworkers can socialize and just joke around like I never understood how classmates could. But I just find online interactions annoying, most memes and social media is obnoxious and I can't stand how undersocialized people are. Even as an autistic I hate how other spergs purposely ignore social cues and rules and act shocked when people dislike them.

Is it possible to be unconsciously anorexic? For example if you don't actively think about restricting nor have obsessive thoughts about food but simply don't eat out of neglect for your own needs?

>>516572
That would just be something else but it's not anorexia

>>516572
my sister was diagnosed with anorexia when it was partially involuntary due to stomach problems so I disagree with the above post but don't care enough to argue about it

>>516572
Yes, anorexia is just a medical term for loss of appetite. It's a symptom, not a diagnosis. Out of neglect for your own needs could be anorexia due to depression and/or poor executive function. It's not an eating disorder. Anorexia Nervosa a psychiatric diagnosis that involves deliberate weight loss.

>>513801
Shit I didn’t know this. Like at all. Noted though. That’s not fucking good.
>>513810
I will have to check it out.

>>483588
Holy shit I remember there being SO much thirst for this character. You had all these different girls on Deviantart with self-insert veteran OCs they shipped with him, and some of them were friends, while others despised each other. Very nostalgic for that kind of dumb tartlet drama

I think it was because no boy my age would actually act like him

>>516471
My lost sister

>>502936
I was the opposite of yours lol. Inuyasha, Ranma, well, not exactly the opposite but Aksaka and Light for me. Don't know the cartoon guys though.

>>516570
You don't recognize the Joker???

>>480971
this is a month late but congratulations, if you ever visit this thread soon I want you to know I cheered for you

>>515759
>>514793
Thanks nonas! Hope it happens for you both as well!

I have never had trouble falling asleep. Pretty much as soon as my head hits the pillow I'm out. Im so glad I can sleep on planes, in cars, anywhere really, and at any time. I feel so bad for people with insomnia.

I've been trying to be more careful when buying thrift clothing and out of two thredup orders everything has fit perfectly. One item from my first order was a $90 sweater I figured I'd never own and I only paid $7.

>>469662
don't ruin your lineage by breeding with genetically inferior moids

>>515928
You retard, nonas are saying "would" as in "would rape" not "would fuck". 32 threads and you still don't get the difference because you're a pathetic scrote(scrotefoiling)

>>515935
Art nonny gave us a lot of content

>>515939
Kek, cope

>>515930
I’m only here because he’s hot and he killed a rich scrote, he’s disgusting in every other way

>>515927
Sorry nonny the tribe has spoken and I removed it out of respect for being a newfag

>>513573
kiss kiss nonna

>>513475
Yes please nonna! Here's mine. Hope I got all the right information selected.

This is a chart for an event, a place and a day. What will happen according to this?

>>514353
Very interesting! A lot of what you've said was very accurate. Spooked me a bit. In the past I've associated astrology with a sort of confirmation bias effect from how generalized it can all be. The very specific points you listed resonated a bit too much though. I'm interested now.
Thanks for analyzing my chart even though I messed it up multiple times. I definitely have a lurker's temperament, and not a poster's.

>>498549
>who probably needs to be told to help with chores
unless you are in Germany or the Nordic countries, this is all men. Men don't mind living in utter filth

>>498551
MANY are, which is why I will only date a man who can at least fucking initiate and show interest in asking me out on a first date. Men gain so much more from a relationship than a woman. The bare minimum is that a man can be sexy and confident and ask you out. Men who wait for women to do this are gross.

>>498236
>Have you ever had an attractive guy approach you and just straight up ask for your number?
No never, this is why I have to take matters into my own hands.

Matched with a woman on bumble, she had really thirst trap-y pics so I shot my shot and said something really cringe about wanting her to sit on my face. But she seemed to love it and we had a VERY sexual convo about her tying me up and using me as a sex toy and she started sending me lingerie pics and stuff. But then mid convo she just unmatched me? Did she just want attention or what? She seemed to be into it but I guess not? I hate it here.

I thought I could put bumble just to have a good looking scelte and go on a date after my exam, but why is it so fucking boring? I thought I could even have sex here and there with the ones who I really liked , but that seems far fetched now kek. I think I have lost interest in men and dating men but I still struggle with the idea of wanting them I guess.
And I’ve tried real life too, it’s the same, no one ever catches my eye so much that I want to engage with them.

>>512745
I know yall don't actually color code all the shit in your purse. This polyvore ass shit

>>513206
What's in your zero waste notebook?

>>513425
just some notes jotted down with things to replace with reuseable products and products I need to refill at a refillery. I ended up repurposing the back pages for general notes because I ran out of space in my other misc notepad

>>513391
I do and not for Polyvore but because these are my fav colors.

>>513391
people do typically buy things in their favorite colors if they can, yes.

>>510871
wow that's a really long time… I think what is also frustrating me is that I'm relying on tutorials to do projects for things I want to make but all the tutorials expect you to know the basics which includes a bunch of sewing jargon. there are also things that are never mentioned like what tension setting to use, what thread, if the fabric should be cut on the grain or weft or bias etc.

>>512863
Check out this book nonnie >>>/g/407931
It's also available on libgen if you're poorfag and/or don't need a physical book. Personally I absolutely love choly knight (her free tutorials are a godsend) and would encourage buying the book.

>>510642
I came back to sewing after around 7 years two years ago and I already had a basic skillset and i learn really fast so right now difference between things i made two years ago and now is huge. first real dress I made came out wearable and I still wear it despite it's flaws. it depends on how fast you learn and how often you sew. i think staying in simple project puragory (pillowcases, pajama pants, etc) for too long stunts many people and trying more advanced projects with cheap/re-used notions and cheap fabric can get you forward. even sewing something "properly" from cheap fabric is good exercise before moving to your actual fabric. i didn't take any lessons by the way, maybe some advice from some women who sew i know irl, but most it was from internet and old books

Does anyone have sewing machine suggestions?

>>513461
thanks nona, I'll read through it and if I find it helpful maybe I'll buy a copy
>>515524
where do you get cheap fabric? used bedsheets from thrift stores?