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No. 420991

Share tips, vent, advice, similar experiences, how to get out of such a rut, what can be changed, what helped you personally, where to meet women you can relate to.

This thread is for:
-those of us who spent our formative years on 4chan/other male dominated spaces and got internet poisoning from it
-those of us who realised men aren't your friends but are now alone
-gender dysphoric women especially socially dysphoric
-ex-TIFs who have come to terms with being female but are now adrift
-those of us who are gender non-conforming in personality, not only appearance
-assorted spergs/speds who have difficulty understanding social norms, unwritten rules, tone of voice, and reading between the lines
-low-empathy or low EQ women
-general loners and NEETs

This thread is NOT for humblebragging about how cool and rational and edgy you are. Please.

Previous thread: >>314525

No. 420993

>>420795
> do any other nonnas feel like they were male socialized? i'm a radfem, obviously, but i always feel insanely guilty when i see other radfems talking about women doing emotional labor for moids or dealing with sexual harassment or discrimination in the workforce because i've never dealt with any of that in any capacity.

I feel the same way. I read this discussion about how women are afraid to raise their hands in the classroom because they're so insecure and all the women were talking about how annoying it was that men dominated the classroom. It made me feel really bad because I was very intellectually secure in my classes, raised my hand so much that the teacher quit calling on me so other kids got a chance, engaged with the material outside of class and wasn't afraid to take other kids (almost always males) on. I got ashamed of it at one point, like I felt I had been "male-like" and made women feel bad, so I stopped raising my hand. I don't feel like that anymore. I put in the work, I loved my classes, and I paid to have intellectual engagement. I never put down other students and always helped anyone who needed help studying. But a lot of female socializing involves trading vulnerabilities and insecurities, so I can't really join in when everyone's talking about how they felt bullied by male students. I was probably bullying the male students tbh.

I love women who are kind of "male socialized," I honestly get weak in the knees when women are intelligent and intellectually uncompromising about their positions without any female-socialized hedging or apologizing. There's so few out there because of how female socialization basically destroys your intellectual self-confidence or makes you feel like a selfish monster for being confident. Women who throw off female socialization without descending into the pits of male-typical behaviors are my favorite people on earth.

No. 421027

>>420993
This is a thing? In my school, the guys were leas likely to try, so the ones who put their hands up were the girls who studied and the autistic/nerdy boys (who were considered cringe)

No. 421223

Not sure if it fits, but I feel like a gay man with the way I like men. It's not as forward as one, but nonna's weird hyperfixation on hairless twinks never sit well with me. Am I truly alone in this?

No. 421226

>>421223
not sure what you mean. are you saying you feel different because you're not attracted to hairless twinks? that's not unusual at all, in fact I'm pretty sure that's been the norm until fairly recently

No. 421229

>>420993
Totally relate especially the part about trading insecurities part. I find that very hard to do. Also when they talk about having to “keep up” with men intellectually, that’s insane to me.

No. 421238

>>420993
>I was probably bullying the male students tbh.
based

No. 421251

>>420993
>I was very intellectually secure in my classes, raised my hand so much that the teacher quit calling on me so other kids got a chance, engaged with the material outside of class and wasn't afraid to take other kids (almost always males) on.
I was this girl until my teachers openly bullied me into "knowing my place". Their actions left me isolated and mostly friendless. I became a troublemaker, was sent to detention and suspended multiple times, teachers hated me even more and doubled-down on punishing me. Girls avoided me because I was 'too weird'/masculine and boys either avoided me because I wasn't feminine or spoke to me like I was a boy too. The experience completely destroyed my sense of self to the point where I began ID'ing as trans.
I'm in my 30s now and have finally regained my confidence as a woman with this personality type. But I still feel like an outsider when interacting with other women at work or at social gatherings. Female co-workers have described me as 'intimidating' and 'intense' because I don't hedge my words or try to make myself small around men.

No. 421254

>>420993
I relate a lot. I don't mind sharing vulnerabilities, but the sharing insecurities part is basically a social script for constant undermining of the self. Same goes for shit like acting like you're dumber/weaker than you really are, women who do this rationalize it as useful but i can't even stand the idea. This is going to sound so sappy but it goes against my ideal of dignity, and being described as competent just feels too good when it happens. On that note, i think a lot of my 'un-feminine' socialization doesn't just stem from asperger, but also from a pretty rough education. My mother grew up in rough circumstances herself and i recall how much of my early childhood was spent training to be stronger, not crying, not relying on comfort, not being so fearful (autistic aversion to the entire world), even being encouraged by my mother to brawl with problem kids as a way to show i had teeth. I still came out of it weird and a choice target for feminine bullying but it did help a lot with having a stronger personality, being recognized as someone who isn't a total pushover. The way it was done was borderline cruel but i'm still thankful for that. Ofc i still struggle with feminine socialization but i feel like i avoided some of its worst parts (like the bludgeoning of intelligence)

No. 421257

I've been trying to make more female friends but I feel like I make other women uncomfortable. I'm not sure if this is founded in reality or if it's residual guilt from being a creepy lesbian as a teenager. Not sure if im looking for advice or to just vent, since im not sure it will ever be different. I have developed a more feminine appearance to try to give off a better impression, but I feel like im too intense and strange once I open my mouth. When I try to be more forward and make the first move with women to start a friendship, im always the one initiating. If im not the one texting or making plans or paying for the outing then they never initiate and it feels so one-sided. Even if we are in person, they won't start a conversation. Theyll only respond to things i say with quick one-liners. I take this to mean that they don't like me, so why would you even come meet with me in the first place? but I had a situation happen twice that is making me wonder if that's just what theyre like: a few of my moid coworkers have a gf who they want me to befriend because "she has got to get out the house more and needs help making friends" so of course I say sure, we can have a girls day! When i meet with her, same thing. wont talk to me, wont engage with me trying to make conversation, but also doesnt try to leave until I say i need to get back home. Doesnt text me back afterwards except for "ok" "thats cool" "yeah" "oh wow", so I assume they didnt like me very much and dont text back either. But then later my coworker will talk to me and ask when our next girls day will be. I'll say something like "It was fun! She's super sweet, but I dont think we meshed very well". Then both times the moid tells me thats strange because his gf said she liked me! Then theyll tell me that she's just slow at responding because she has social anxiety. Is this normal? Am I reading too much into this? To be honest, I would like a friendship that feels equal, but is this just what normal women are like or am I making them uncomfortable and theyre just not saying anything to not hurt my feelings?
>>420993
>Women who throw off female socialization without descending into the pits of male-typical behaviors are my favorite people on earth.
Have you ever read mary shelley's vindication on the rights of woman? Its really good. it talks about how female socialization is an artifice or virtue meant to keep women enslaved. It is both amazing and discouraging that the issues she talks about way back then are still relatable today.

No. 421258

>>421254
Samefagging because i can't delete to edit, my bad. Another thing that drives me insane is the artificial inflation of sex differences in behavior. Women do it all the time and it's so retarded. A man will say 'i do [silly relatable thing]' and women go 'ewww i could never relate, men are so weiiird'. Why are you acting like you're part of an alien species? Another thing is the good girl LARP, complaining about the way men aren't as feminine in them in interactions. I feel like some of it is legitimate observation of misogyny, but a lot is basically 'ugh men are so rude and direct and they love to play devil's advocate'. I wish women allowed themselves to be more like that, to disagree (so-called devil's advocate), to be serious and take themselves seriously.

No. 421265

>>421257
I haven't had that experience but you're completely in the right to feel so confused and bewildered by that behavior. Either those women are lying to their boyfriends to not hurt their fee-fees and trying to gray rock you so you go away on your own, or they've succumbed to some induced retardation that makes them feel like they can't/shouldn't take initiative ever. Either way I'd personally feel repulsed by having to baby and coddle them. Grown ass women fail.

No. 421270

>>421257
Speaking as someone who's been paralyzed by social anxiety before and unable to connect with other women even when I really liked them, I bet they just completely suck socially and that's why their boyfriends said they needed help making friends. So I wouldn't take it as rejection necessarily, but I also wouldn't torture yourself by trying to push and going through it again. You tried.

No. 421279

So I came across something where it teaches you how to have better social skills and developing charisma and just wanted to know, but have you’ve ever known someone who had charisma? What was it like talking to them? Did you ever saw what their social lives were like? I’ve known popular people before but most of them aren’t even charismatic, just well versed in the social skills area.

No. 421294

>>421223
I think I get you. I feel this because I like men in a "i could connect with this dude as equal to or above him" rather than the stereotypical normie girl "this guy is better than me" schtick, could that be it?

No. 421295

File: 1722703745055.webp (41.83 KB, 540x543, weirdshit.png)

>>420795
Me too, nonna.
>low neuroticism
>low empathy
>physically bullied male classmates
>only learned how to do house chores when 18 years old and im still lazy when i need to do it
>learned helplessness
>wandered in male dominated internet spaces since early teens
I don’t want to sound edgy, but I simply fake empathy and sometimes neuroticism around other women because doing otherwise is social suicide.
Unfortunately, the house chores part is one of the most annoying male traits in existence.

No. 421296

>>421295
me too, i have empathy but i have to fake more obvious emotions (OTT giggling, smiling, "oh no, really??" like normies) just to be seen as human. people think i'm intimidating because i don't smile much but i don't see the point, my head is blank most of the time and seeing people show extreme emotion makes me so uncomfortable. i have to walk on eggshells around much women, which hurts as i know i'm not a bad person.

No. 421298

>>420993
Thank you nonna, I wish more women were like you! It enrages me to see smart, funny women putting themselves down all the time, especially when other women encourage it. Even as a kid I knew guys were dumb idiots so couldn't relate to the girls who put themselves in an inferior category to men. Seeing friends suddenly drop their entire personality to fit in and support some retarded moid's shitty vision genuinely radicalised me kek

No. 421302

It's so difficult to talk with other girls online. Every time a conversation starts they suddenly stop opening the chat. They do keep in touch later by sending stuff, so there's still some interest but it's just impossible to talk with them for more than two minutes. So I can never be close friends with any girl. It happens over and over, they stop the conversation, then a new topic comes up and they stop talking about it after a couple minutes and so on.

No. 421308

I have a question for everybody here. Do you think non-normie women are mostly influenced by nature or nurture? My environment played of role into it, but I think deep down. I was always gonna be like this. Even if I had the perfect normal plain childhood,I think my environment probably just speed it up the effects. I think I would’ve just became a non-normie later in life instead of the age 7. I always had a more quiet, low empathy and skeptical personality than most women and due to this I couldn’t be peer pressured so easily. What traits do you think most non-normie women have? I think being less likely to peer pressured and not being as influenced by female socialization is common. Also autism.

No. 421364

>>420993
KEK this reminded me of when i was in hs and i got a bit interested in science,so i participated a lot in class but my teacher called me a know it all, telling me i didnt give my classmates a chance and that hurt for some reason so i stopped caring about the classes and when i got a low grade in her class she said she was totally dissapointed, what a bitch tbh

No. 421443

>>420993
When I was in younger grades, I got bullied by my teachers (male and female) a lot and they'd turn a blind eye to boys sexually harassing me but I'd get blamed for yelling at them or throwing paper at them, and I'd get screamed at for whatever else. I remember a male teacher literally pulled the chair out from behind me and snapped at me when I tried to sit and fell down. I lived in the south so I assume racism was a part of it (I am not white) as well as me possibly being autistic, though I never got a diagnosis. Only semi related but I remember when a school counselor literally singled out my very short Indian male friend and pulled him to the front of the class and said that it was wrong to pick on people like him??? There were also a few other incidents like that, but I won't get into it.

I moved later in life and at my new school I had several very old, mean female teachers who were incredibly strict and I loved them. I honestly feel like I would have hated school if I didn't have them as teachers. They weren't easy though and they were fucking mean, but they didn't choose favorites and honestly encouraged the weird competitiveness between students, and most importantly were wonderful teachers. It helped raise my self-esteem to the point of me shitting on the other top students in those classes, who were almost always male. But I couldn't really have that kind of meanness/hate with girls.

Anyways the thing is that I couldn't really make friends with other female students who were also very smart and studious, all of them were very female socialized and in tune with feelings and such, were into stuff like musicals and Disney and I didn't care at all. Most of my truly close female friends didn't do very well in school, but I find they were far less judgmental of how I acted or my weird quirks. Even now the only female friends I can maintain actual friendships with are diagnosed autistic women. Maybe I do have autism.

No. 421459

>>421295
>>421296
Maybe you'd get along better with women who are naturally/culturally more stoic. I've had normalfag friends (technically house mates but we did form pretty good relationship, we hung out often and they included me in their social circles) who just learned to accept that I'm not an expressive or overly enthused person, they know I care I just can't provide the passionate reactions they might seek. This comes at the cost of me feeling like I'm not their closet friend or the first person they reach out for in crisis but I kinda made peace with that. I mean they were there for me so I think that meant they saw me as a friend right? There was still a lot of anxiety before I got comfortable enough to stop masking so hard, I think women can really pick up on that no matter how well I think I'm faking it. In return, I just do the part of being considerate about things that they care about like picking up after myself, being (somewhat) on time and listen to their mundane conversations, I think that's fair. I still haven't found that soul-deep friendship I crave but at least it kinda helps to know my cold personality isn't a deal breaker for normal women.
>>421302
Online friendships are destined to die if they aren't open to hanging in voice chat every so often.

No. 421566

Did anyone else had difficulty to blend in when it comes to fashion? I don't mean in "she wears skirts, I wear Converse" type of way, I mean genuinely trying to look feminine and copy the same looks as others but still failing? When I was into normie and gyaru fashion I could never reach the same type of aesthetic as the other gyarus in my community, they looked so clean and well put but I always felt out of place. I fucking hate it when people tell me I'm "unique" when I'm not trying to be because it makes me paranoid they clock me as a sperg. I want to dress up but I always feel so disgusting and weird doing it.

No. 421570

>>421566
is there a particular style you're trying to imitate? if you practice good hygiene and bathe regularly then it's unlikely that you are actually less clean than the women you are comparing yourself to. they may just have a more intensive hair and skincare routine than what you practice (and oftentimes those products are ultimately useless).

No. 421597

>>421566
How much of that perception is low self esteem and feeling like you’re wearing a costume instead of just wearing clothes you like? If talking about outward appearance, you don’t look the same in the same clothes as someone else it’s not because you’re a sperg, it’s because you’re not them. Any community’s “standards” pour a lot of resources into being the standard, resources that you don’t have or even know exist. Your ability to relate to other women doesn’t hinge on how well you can wear their skin anyway.

No. 421606

>>421566
maybe you have a lack of understanding regarding clothing fit and your body type/measurements, so you don't pick up on that different clothing silhouettes work better for different women.

No. 421635

>>421566
I think I get what you mean, anon. I haven't worn makeup and put in a ton of effort in years but whenever I did back then, I always felt ugly and out of place too. No matter how hard I tried, my makeup just always looked either too plain or too cakey compared to others, my hair somehow was always already messed up when I arrived and I never managed to find the right style for the occasion/weather/whatever. Often I put in a ridiculous amount of effort, like exfoliating right before putting on my makeup, so that my skin is perfectly and smooth and yet…? It makes me wonder how other girls somehow always manage to look put well together, how do they always know the right amount of dressing up, how does their hair not move, how are they never sweating, how are they never in a hurry, and so on…

No. 421639

>>421635
You're pretending to be someone you're not by piling a bunch of shit on your face. Don't feel bad about not doing it "right". All makeup and most skincare is frivolous garbage designed by men meant to waste women's time.

No. 421646

>>421223
Anon, "twink" is literally a gay male term and I assure you that the majority of males who shave/wax their bodies are gay and doing it for other gay males.

No. 421649

>>421639
Shut up and go back to your containment thread, schizo. You aren't helping.
>>421635
>>421566
>It makes me wonder how other girls somehow always manage to look put well together
Take it from someone who's a newly minted normie of a few years after a lifetime of being a maladjusted autistic, the sad truth is that the really 'hot' girls put in tons of effort and money into their looks and it simply does take a lot of your time. It also takes a lot of trial and error but eventually everyone settles into their routine and knows what works for them and it gets easier from there.
>how do they always know the right amount of dressing up
They've had a lifetime of conditioning and practice, probably a mom or older sister or friends who knew, and they have a circle of friends to ask for advice. Having a fashionable relative or friend is huge. My mom is lovely but can't dress for shit, same with dad and sister. The only fashion commentary they have is 'looks nice'. Which is fine if you're happy with how you look, but I wasn't.
Another thing is most girls at some point develop a go-to outfit or uniform that they like and rewear a lot. I didn't have any of this and spent years banging my head against the wall until I found a style that I liked, felt comfy in and other people found cute too.
>how does their hair not move
Hairspray and mousse, but there's also many tutorials on tiktok for updos that stay up
>how are they never sweating
Antiperspirant and showering frequently
>how are they never in a hurry
Most people are, you just can't see it. If I learned anything it's that the majority of people have a lot swarming in their head but don't want to show weakness so they don't share.

I think a good place to start is find a little thing that makes you feel a tiny bit more done up and go from there. I used to hate wearing earrings until I found a flattering pair, and I used to hate my hair until I got a cute French bob. Most importantly don't compare yourself too much because you don't know who you're comparing yourself to, how much effort they put into their looks and skills, and how hard their life really is.

No. 421676

>>421649
>paragraphs upon paragraphs of how to present as a woman correctly through hours and hours and hundreds of dollars (which go into men's pockets)
ngmi. You chose to obsessively conform at the cost of everything else

No. 421684

>>421258
Tbh I don't trust men who do devil's advocate either cause they use it as an excuse to defend rapists and pedos or other shitty moids in general but in an "intellectual" way.

No. 421686

>>421676
This tbh

No. 421694

>>421649
Larping as a normie is not worth all this bullshit. If you are actually autistic, you can only mask so much and so long before you crack.

No. 421696

Is it a good idea to tell your acquaintances about your neurodivergence if you’re trying to make friends?

No. 421697

>>421696
No. Unless they have admitted the same to you, it will come across as weird.

No. 421699

>>421697
Ok. I have an ADHD acquaintance I might tell her about my autism. Maybe it will bring us closer.

No. 421701

I guess I'm the one that spent my formative years on the internet and am poisoned.

I had male friends until around when puberty hits, then after that I've mostly had girl bullies that acted like friends. I have tried to be friends with women when I got out of school but there was just too much back stabbing.

30 now trying to befriend other women, but my god I can not get over this thought that they are bad in some way, will fuck me over somehow, etc… So I just don't have friends.

Has anyone been able to actually get past this? Or should I settle in to loneliness?

>>421308
If I had to guess, I'd say probably a bit of both would play a role. I don't think just nature or nurture would be enough.

No. 421753

>>421566
Idk if this will make you feel better but tons of women dress very feminine and still struggle to fit in and make friends because femininity is chiefly about how mindbroken/docile you are internally.

No. 421755

I've been trying to find friends from my city I've moved to, but every conversation just fizzles out. Thats assuming they even attempt to reciprocate.
I ask questions to get to know them and get met with 2 word answers, not attempt at conversation back, nothing for me to bounce anything off of.
I dont like small talk myself but in the first few conversations I dont know how else to bridge the gap, I ask them about something to do with their profile and get a one word or two word reply. I feel like an ugly guy on a dating app trying to catch a girls attention lmao. Where do I find women who are actually interested in getting to know me back, rather than me just trying to make conversation at them and them giving me crumbs?
I dont know if its my city itself maybe?

No. 421757

>>421755
Making friends once you're an adult, especially as a woman, simply feels impossible

No. 421760

>>421755
So you're on apps for meeting people (platonically) already and you're being met with those kind of responses? That's weird. Do your interests not line up maybe?

No. 421761

>>421308
I am an autist so I think I was going to turn out non-normie no matter what. Having more caring and supportive parents likely would have made a huge difference in terms of my mental health though. I was left alone online all the time which likely exacerbated some of my more autistic traits and exposed me to too much extreme imagery. I think that likely made me more low empathy.

I agree with your assessment that introversion, lower empathy, and skepticism are defining features of a non-normie woman. Not to be an NLOG, but I feel like in all my interactions with other women, I have not met one with those particular qualities which has made for a very lonely existence for me. I can interact with people just fine but I never can establish a deep connection with anybody. My boyfriend is pretty much the only person other than my parents who I can talk to about anything.

No. 421765

>>421761
low empathy is the norm these days imo

No. 421767

>>421753
I disagree. Social expectations of femininity are purely shallow and superficial. Nobody notices meek quiet submissive nice girls no matter how feminine they are. Whichever women has a) the prettiest face b) the best body and c) most attention grabbing personality is who gets lauded as the epitome of femininity.

Even tradmoids and right wing men are all thirsting over the 'hawk tuah' girl. All the Stacies at my school were loud, obnoxious, aggressive, tomboyish in behavior, honestly. But because they had pretty faces and slim-curvy feminine bodies, everyone treated them like goddesses. When you're pretty and feminine looking you're allowed to be as aggressive, hypersocial and hypersexual as you want, that's what men find hot and pay most attention to, no matter how much they whine about wanting a meek quiet church girl gf.

No. 421768

>>421765
Nah women are still coddling males who they deem to be one of the good ones 

No. 421778

>>420795
I do understand you, nona. It's difficult to be a strage autistic woman. Male autistos always have a large community, but we seem to be impossibly rare. 
>the same deeply-set personality flaws as a scrote. and that's not even mentioning how even here i feel like shit because my sexuality feels anime-pornified the same way as a scrote, i love ecchishit and disproportionately large tits and shit. i can't even have an inoffensive lesbian sexuality fml. i'm not good enough to be either a man or a woman. i'm some other monstrous third gender. does anyone know wtf i'm talking about
Its is what it is, nona, autistic woman. It must be VERY rare so its difficult to find other women like you. For me the really alienating thing is the realization how the average women are deeply masochistic. BJ chan is insane but she is right. Its just how they are. And i am more into a sadistic side. Remember these stories about trannies jerking off women's locker rooms? I feel like I am this exact thing. I don't do it obviously, but I do avoid going to public pools, for example, because I will feel like a literal predator. I guess its good that I am short and have long hair, if I was tall I would be the definition of that homophobic stereotype of predatory lesbian.

No. 421783

>>421760
Yep, bumble friends, Facebook friend finder groups for my city, I'm pregnant so also now I'm on mum connection apps/ groups for my city. It all ends in the same way.
I match with people I have common interests with, start conversations around it and still nada.
I've even changed my strategy and had "I'll take cute pictures of you for you to post on instagram" in a profile since thats most of the women on here, when it's something I'm not interested in doing at all because I figured those are the girls who will actually want to meet up and do stuff/have friendships, and id like to visit aesthetic places in nature outside without personally posting it and even they one word me. I know it's a meme but I really don't think it's me.. maybe it is, I know not to be overeager but if I give the same energy they give me the conversation stops 3 messages in.
>>421757
Yeah it sucks.

No. 421788

>>421783
I don't know about mom groups but I imagine childless/childfree women are probably reluctant to befriend pregnant women/moms for obvious reasons..

No. 421794

>>421788
Yeah, but this was before I was pregnant. I moved here 2 years ago so I've been looking since then. Now that I'm pregnant it's moved to other mother groups instead of child free women

No. 421800

>be lonely autistic internet poisoned lesbian
>all female friendships fizzle out because i'm a retard with male hobbies and no interest in the female socialization game
>literally only friends with gay dudes, even my bestie is a gay dude
>once every five years meet one autistic woman who i connect with on a profound level
>become platonically obsessed with her, want to be her best friend, her platonic soulmate, want to do everything with her, want to give her the world
>every single goddamn time it's some bihet with a boyfriend who will always choose her scrote over me
it hurts. i wish my lesbian friends weren't so accomplished and offline, that way they could be the terminally online friend i need who i could spend every second of the day larping as their platonic gf with but alas, they have degrees. i wish i didn't get so attached to begin with, but it's so incredibly rare for me to feel this kind of connection that i go crazy. how do i stop feeling like this, how do i become more interested in the normies around me? can i even? with her i can talk about anything, and i get so bored pretending i give a fuck about makeup and jewelry and current events with regular women. i genuinely feel like a pickme but just for her, like i want her to get rid of her stupid boring guy friends and her idiot moid (that she doesn't even like) and let me be her non-romantic boyfriend. every time she's able to hang out i drop everything to spend time with her and i know i'll never be that important to her. she gives me little breadcrumbs which i think secretly adds fuel to the fire, like letting me know i'm special to her and that she loves me. fucking hell. and i know my clinginess is my problem, but i do keep all my insanity to myself and keep my distance since i'm deathly afraid of smothering her, leaving me to internalize everything and i just want to get rid of these emotions. sorry this is all over the place but i want to become normal so bad… help me, anons

No. 421813

>>421800
>become platonically obsessed with her, want to be her best friend, her platonic soulmate, want to do everything with her, want to give her the world
>every single goddamn time it's some bihet with a boyfriend who will always choose her scrote over me
Nona how do I contact you. I have the exact same experience. I dont know if it will be turbo autistic but maybe I should make a throwaway Tumblr acc and post the name on here. 

No. 421822

>>421765
When I think about it, I think it isn't low empathy exactly but more an outward expression of empathy that society expects women to have. If you aren't at least a little expressive, especially for other people, people probably think you're strange since women are expected to be "nice" and "caring."

No. 421825

>>421813
feel free to attach an email if you want or leave the tumblr acc you mentioned. it might be nice to hear about other people's experiences with this

No. 421826

File: 1722873100843.webp (35.98 KB, 570x570, friendlyuser666.jpg)


No. 421829

>>421800
>once every five years meet one autistic woman who i connect with on a profound level
>become platonically obsessed with her, want to be her best friend, her platonic soulmate, want to do everything with her, want to give her the world
>every single goddamn time it's some bihet with a boyfriend who will always choose her scrote over me
Story of my life. Same fears of coming across as too obsessed. I'm luckier now (the latest ones are honestly heterosexual or female-leaning bi) but the first one devastated me, it was a full-blown infatuation on top of the incredible connection i felt. Only in the past couple months have i realized that she's obviously straight and not bi like she said lol

No. 421837

>>421800
God I didn’t think anyone else experienced this. It hurts. Down to being a terminally online lesbian, and the vapid shit most irl women are into (sorry just my opinion kek). Why do they always choose the scrotes. It’s worse when he mistreats her and then she comes crying back. I don’t know if I’m autistic or bippie or whatever but…
>>421757
Is it? The best friends I’ve had always came from sharing my hobbies online, much better than the irl friends I made from school - I would ignore them for them, even.

No. 421838

>>421829
Samefagging but yeah, they always turn out to be straight. Straight women who say they’re bi are really hellborn creations here to fuck with us kek

No. 421886

>>421459
Don't really think so, I have online friendships without voice chat. My mistake is believing these girls would be my friends in the first place. I will remove this expectation and move on focusing on other things.

No. 422026

File: 1722922094561.jpg (50.65 KB, 716x645, ff4.jpg)

>>421755
I know how you feel. I get the same shit.
Occasionally I'll just bluntly ask after a few days of one word responses why they're being so blunt and short. Granted I only have a single person who actually responded to the question, but I was told they were currently talking to over 100 people one-on-one, and even more on social media. So it might just be a lot of 'competition' so to speak, to keep up with all the chatter on the internet.

Once I get over my fear of the outdoors, I think I'll try meeting people in the wild.

No. 422027

I know some yall have mentioned it, and I wondered what does it mean when a nona says she feels like a gay man? Surely we could just discard if as "another Aiden larping as yaoi uke" but I do know that autistic women may express attraction different.  

No. 422033

>>422027
It means she can’t relate her GNCness to anything else except maleness since representation of GNC women is nonexistent, but the part about autistic faghaggery is true too probably

No. 422034

>>422027
personally i would never say something so cringe, but i still almost exclusively lurk gay blogs/sites if i want to find hot guy pics. women just never seem to like the types i like, so in that sense i do have things in common with gay moids. if other anons are anything like me, it can be a matter of having niche preferences and turn ons that set you apart from more normie women.

No. 422040

>>422027
Out of all the groups I've struggled with, I have never gotten along with gay men the most and it seems like they can always see my autism and give me a hard time. I never understood women being able to relate to them.

No. 422045

>>422040
Gay men are absolutely awful. They’ll only kiss your ass if youre a hyperextroverted glamorous stacy who talks like a drag queen. They despise autistic and homely women.

No. 422062

>>421767
quiet meek submissive girls are feminine though. and im not talking about what men notice (who cares) but about making female friends and women will absolutely give you shit for being extroverted, "slutty", socially retarded, confident, extra. there is absolutely a social expectation on women (mostly imposed by other women) to be humourless, meek, passive and demure.

No. 422064

>>422062
>there is absolutely a social expectation on women (mostly imposed by other women) to be humourless, meek, passive and demure.
Not true at all. No woman acts meek, passive, humorless and demure unless thats her natural persoanlity OR has been enforced on her by religion/scrotes at home who check her behavior.

Bubbly sociable confident girls with an obvious sense of humor are always most popular women, even among other women. Total bs that women want other women to be serious, distant and humorless.

No. 422066

>>422064
Also I would say that meek quiet introverted girls are the ones who get bullied and ostracized most by other women for being weird or thinking they're too good to join in with the socializing.
They're also the ones who get preyed on and used as doormats the most by men, often because they have less friends to give them advice or back them up, whereas popular social girls always have an army of friends who will defend them. Any women who are quiet introverted and aloof get called bitches or weirdos and are generally disliked by both women and men (except if theyre low self esteem and easier to get sex from). Look at the women moids are simping for online. They're always the most loud obnoxious attention grabbing women imaginable. Even 'conservative' moids who 'prefer feminine women' like those bold hypersocial obnoxious extroverted type women. Those women are always the most successful in life.

No. 422074

>>422064
idk where you live tbf so it might be cultural but I'm really familiar with being considered "too much" for being confident, blunt, making jokes, regardless of how I'm dressed and I have a really girly sense of style. also yes moids love orbiting "slutty" women while keeping the demure wallflower "good wife" type at home.

No. 422075

I usually find myself pushed out of any female friend group I would like to be part of for I can only imagine being too attractive and standoffish when I'm really shy and really weird looking imo I get a lot of compliments about my looks that I don't understand and don't know how to react to them and other women interpret that as being rude

No. 422076

I watched this video a while back and a lot of stuff started making sense..

No. 422093

>>422075
You mean you have a unique face nonita? Like these strange models?

No. 422114

>>422093
I guess it's unique, don't know if it's like a model's face but I do know that combined with my personality is causing making friends with women difficult and I've experienced a lot of ostracism.

No. 422120

>>422034
>liking well groomed hot men as a woman makes me a gay man
Absolute beta mental

No. 422144

>>422120
Well normie women wont dare to demand a moid to wash his ass for them so I guess having preferences counts as gay male brained kekk

No. 422167

>>422144
Even boomer women were more demanding than that
Wtf happened

No. 422247

>>422062
ntayrt but maybe it really is a cultural thing cause where i live (burgerland) it's the total opposite, everyone prefers loud confident types and picks on quiet passive women for being "boring/weird", and the reasons >>422066 said

No. 422250

>>420595
I'm not sure where to look tbh. I guess I probably am not looking hard enough. I had looked on meetup and it seemed largely inactive in my area, but haven't really gone on Facebook or anything like that yet. when I've found cool classes - pottery, stuff like that - they're either on weekdays or they're on weekends but get booked out months ahead.
at the end of the day I know I need to make more of a solid effort, but I just feel so mentally exhausted from long work days/hour long commutes, etc.

No. 422252

>>422120
what. anon, did you read my post wrong…? i'm into some gross stuff, if that matters.

No. 422268

>>422076
I took the hoepill and decided to leverage the attention of simps for my own benefit.
If women are going to be mean to me because of my potential to steal a scrote’s resources I might as well live up to that reputation and profit from attentionwhoremaxxing. I’m not even straight so I never wanted to play this stupid game.

No. 422284

>>422268
Based.Damn I wanna blackpill so bad but the thread is conquered completely by that schizo retard

No. 422294

>>422247
In America and the UK loud bubbly extroverted type girls are definitely preferred by everyone. Maybe in certain European or Asian countries there's more expectations for women to act mark demure and nice all the time.

No. 422305

I'm not sure at what point you turn the relationship from "acquaintances" into "friends". I've joined many hobby groups/clubs where I'll meet people and get along with some, but we never cross the line into friendship and hanging out outside of the club setting. This sounds so autistic, but how do you make it clear that you want to be friends? I imagine it's not as simple as saying "Want to be friends?" like it was when you were a kid. Asking for a woman's phone number also feels so awkward to me, I feel like a creep and I don't want to push them away. They never seem to want to initiate this themselves, so I guess it's up to me. Any advice?

>>421755
I have the same problem.
>>421459
>Maybe you'd get along better with women who are naturally/culturally more stoic
NTA but I have had a hard time finding women who are more stoic. I can be sociable, but I'm not super expressive and I've noticed it can turn women off. I've had friends in the past that understood, but it's been difficult to find people that do now.

No. 422318

I grew up having difficulty relating to other PEOPLE because both of my parents are retards, but if it helps anyone ITT, I learned how to find common ground with almost anyone through conversation and it’s helped me form friendships with very different types of women. Basically I just kind of subtly observe them a bit, how they interact, what they talk about to others, then I try to engage w them about stuff. Even if it’s stuff I’m not personally into—it helps, but it’s not super necessary? I love talking to people, and I know not everyone does, but I used to be shy and insecure til I figured out my brand of chatty if that makes sense. I’d also say I have ONE best friend, an autist like me who likes to sperg and comes off as way too aloof if she doesn’t make effort, but that doesn’t mean the less deep friendships I have w other women aren’t meaningful. Even the friend who I only talk to about the gym pretty much and at the gym, we have other overlapping interests but our personalities aren’t completely compatible for that best friend type bond. As long as there is one woman in the world other than my mother who I can hang out with and feel free, I’m happy to maybe compromise more in other friendships just for the joy of positive social interaction. If this reads as weird or lame to anyone I’m sorry kek it was how I valiantly turned around my clear cut loner arc in childhood. There’s nothing wrong w preferring one’s own company either, nor having trouble relating to other women. I just hate that there’s such a black and white mentality on both sides of like normie women and weirdo outcast women. One of my closest high school friends was the most popular girl in our grade bc it turned out she was a fucking weirdo who liked Salad Fingers and shit. We only talked bc we were next to each other in choir. Don’t lose hope of finding at least one weirdo to soul bond with, but also don’t discount other potential more light fluffy friendships! I would invite every nonna in this thread to a mixer with snacks kek

No. 422354

>>422066
Afaik the woman who coined the phrase 'Well behaved women rarely make history' was actually pointing out the fact that quiet demure modest women remain unnoticed by society despite society trying to claim such traits are virtuous for women. And that men and society in general always lauds and fawns over 'bad girl' types despite claiming to hate those women.

No. 422693

>>422305
If the hobby group meets in person, maybe ask some people if they want to go out for food/drinks after? Make sure you ask a few, so it doesn't look like you're trying to ask someone on a date.
Granted I'm fucking autistic so this may be terrible advice.

No. 422694

Maybe this is a bit schizophrenic but literally every woman I befriend seems to go out of their way to ensure my downfall friendship-wise. Why is it that anytime I think I've made a good new friend with another woman and I vent to her about girls around us who I used to be friends with but treated me like shit, the new friend always eventually drops me and befriends the ones who I said were horrible to me? I live in a small city so everyone in my area knows each other, this has happened atleast four times in the past couple of years. I don't expect people I befriend to not have other friends, but it seems like more than a coincidence that after telling them about who wronged me they constantly post photos online of them hanging out together from their new friendship. I can't tell if it's solely just me being autistic and saying the wrong things/saying too much to new people or if I'm really being sabotaged by those around me. Even if I come off as a resentful loser who isn't ideal to be around, it makes no sense for them to only befriend the women I've told them about especially as there's way more options for them to be with. I don't see the appeal in getting close to people who are known to have bullied and ostracised others.

No. 422732

>>422694
If you talk shit about others people assume you will do it about them as well when they are not around. Which you are kinda doing by making this post? Also you probably come off as self centered and with a victim mentality and this encourages these people to get together based on the common ground of disliking you and treating them as vent dumps.
There is a phenomenon where people will assign the traits you tell them other people have to you, I forgot what it's called. So if you keep talking shit about others, the person listening to you may start thinking you have the behaviors and traits you complain about. And since you complain about negative things it's likely you don't come off as a likeable person or maybe you're just extremely draining to be around because of this. I personally avoid any type of complainers altogether, it's so exhausting and unpleasant to spend time with someone who would has their mind attuned to negatives in other people. If you can't contain yourself from talking negatively about people, try not talking about them at all and talk about interests or activities instead (even if the other person wants to gossip they could be just testing you to see if you run your mouth)

No. 422882

>>422694
you're never going to have a healthy, fulfilling friendship if you talk shit about other women to every woman you befriend. all you're going to achieve is either attracting dysfunctional women who thrive on negativity or driving away women who rightly interpret that behavior as a red flag and suspect you're talking about them behind their back. it's okay to have feelings of anger that you need to get out but if this has happened to you repeatedly then that indicates you're doing it too often. if the women you make friends with always ending treating you badly then that also indicates you're gravitating towards a type of person who is not a good fit for you and you need to choose who you befriend and confide in more carefully.

No. 423234

>>422732
>>422882
enough with y'all victim blaming bullshit

No. 423485

>>422732
I don't shit talk about them (about their personality or interests) I just vent about how they bullied me for years and would spread lies about me so others would hate me. And btw I only vent once the other person has before or if our relationship is long enough that we feel close to do this. But I do get how I come off as draining I'm not sure what to do about this though.
But in the end I'm not really here asking for advice on how to change my personality to suit others (maybe I should) I'm just asking what I'm doing wrong and why they all ditch me for those who are known to be harmful. I know I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who did horrible shit to others, so why do they? I can't vent to a friend but they can leave me to go talk shit about me to someone else? Where is the appeal in befriending someone just because you all mutually dislike someone please tell me maybe I should get in on that and I'll make long-lasting friends for once lol.

>>422882
Am I gravitating towards harmful people or are harmful people gravitating towards me? If all those I attract and gravitate to aren't a good fit how do I even go about choosing friends carefully? People only show their true colours after wronging you and then it's too late. It's all trial and error so far.

But thank you anyway nonnies. Even if you guys were a bit mean I think I probably needed a slight reality check. I need to fix my victim mentality and move cities and all will be well.

No. 423491

>>423485
nta and im sorry if this sounds mean but most people dont gaf about how shitty people are unless it affects them directly.
btw maybe your bullies are really nice to people who arent you kek and if they still dislike you for whatever reason they can just turn people against you if they're smart enough.
You should never talk shit about people who are manipulative or in general tbh, unless you met someone REALLY shitty and have an extremely close friend , if they dont have anything against you (like talking about how they bullied you or how theyre horrible people) they'll just sound insane

No. 423538

>>423485
Honestly, I think the being in a small city thing is a huge part of the issue. The other anons have good points too but I imagine the small town social setting exacerbates it. I also used to be similar to you in that I would be prone to complaining and venting to people who I thought I was close with and I learned that most people don't give a shit or would just get annoyed with me, even if it was me venting about an ex who was physically abusive to me. I find it more effective to treat venting with a bit of light-hearted snarkiness rather than just complaining. Only an extremely close friend will tolerate full-on venting.

No. 423541

Vent. I managed to make a female friend last year and she just disappeared from my life early this year. As soon as we met she was super invested and basically calling me im her bestie and wanted to plan trips together etc… Maybe it's just my autism making me dumb and naive but I thought she was serious. She's an incredibly social and therefore busy person but it's pretty obvious she's avoiding me specifically. Since shes busy i've respected that and not texted her much and instead texted every now and then and ask if she wants to hang out. I have done the same as I do with my other friends, but they are guys and she was my first ever female friend… She never opened my texts either, she could be active on social media and even view my Stories but still not opening my text for hours or even days. I miss her but theres no point in a onesided friendship… I hate that I get along better with men, both neurodivergent and neurotypical but mostly neurodivergent, and I dont know why. It feels like most women rely a lot on non-verbal communication and that's impossible for me. I've done CBT three times. I wish I could meet other women on the spectrum but my little city is dead af and the autism facebook groups i'm in has people from literally all over the country EXCEPT my area lol… I've tried a friendship app to meet women but they like my profile but then they are inactive, or we exchange one text each and then they stop responding. Meanwhile making friends with men is literally zero effort. I feel like im missing out on a lot, and I feel like something is seriously wrong with me that women do not like me or at least doesnt see me as friendship material. I'm someone who always tries to be there for my friends and i've been told i'm a good listener and supportive and all that stuff but the problem might be that I am that to male standards only? I am a very quiet person with limited expressions because im not good at verbally expressing emotions nor giving or recieveing compliments. Whenever I try to force myself to be comfortable with those things its so obvious that im forcing it that its just best to say nothing because otherwise it typically gets misinterpreted as insincere compliments or excitement… An old therapist of mine once described "matching someones emotional state" by for example matching their tone of voice and mood by also expressing loud excitement if they share something great for example, but I dont seem to have the ability to do so and I really suck at expressing things in ways others do. It seems that because of those faults in my brain im going to stay lonely without the companionships of other women, feels pretty hopeless at times.

No. 423573

>>423541
>As soon as we met she was super invested and basically calling me im her bestie and wanted to plan trips together etc
Red flags to me. It's not surprising she dropped you quickly. I've had the same thing happen to me and it turns out she was very mentally ill according to my classmates. I'm also like you in that I'm on the spectrum and make friends easier with moids. I feel like I'd need to meet another equally autistic woman if I ever want the possibility of a close female friend. However, so many naively accept gender identity beliefs and are TIFs. I wish I could look past that but I just can't. It's hard for us female autists.

No. 423823

>>423491
Yeah that's true. There's one girl in this city who vented to me about these same girls too, she was the only one that gaf (but she was also desperate for friends I think). Thanks for the advice

>>423538
Yes being in a small city is also a major reason why I think these girls are so well off with friends too and can get away with their actions.
Because when I think about it more, people may mainly befriend them because they're scared of not being on good terms with them and having the same things being done to them. Once they hear what happened to me, they probably think they're the next target if they're around me for too long.

No. 423828

>>423485
i'm >>422882 and i wasn't trying to be mean. all i was trying to convey was that if this keeps happening to you then you're either venting too much and sabotaging your friendships or you're befriending people who aren't good for you. it's not victim-blaming to say that sometimes the best way to break a cycle is to examine our own behavior. you have to learn how to protect yourself from shitty people because no one else can do it for you. whether you are gravitating towards these women or they are gravitating towards you doesn't really matter, what's important is that you identify their behavior early in the friendship before you start confiding in them so you don't get hurt again.

No. 423837

All scrotes are retarded misogynists and not boyfriend material, but I can't help but feel inferior to other women for never having had a romantic relationship and its affected so many of my relationships with friends… I hate that I'm not mature enough to hear about a friend's happy relationship without feeling jealous or miserable, I'm supposed to be happy for them but I can't stop being self centered and internally mope about how I'll never be able to experience it. Maybe I'm just not cut out for relationships outside of family in general. I just have no interest befriending people in relationships, constantly being around a reminder of what I can never have will only make me more miserable and lead to resentment to people who did nothing to deserve it

No. 423844

>>423837
Same. But the joke is even if a scrote asked me to date him I would turn him down because I don’t want a boyfriend, but somehow I still feel less-than compared to my friends (or did, when I had any)

No. 423848

>>423837
Relationships with moids ain't worth shit. You're romanticizing them if you're putting this much value to them. Such relationships come with a lot of bullshit and compromising and aren't all fun and games like others might be telling you. I hope you can let go of that mindset because it really isn't worth agonizing over.

No. 423851

>>423844
yeah, I think it might be women who brag about the good things their nigels do while strategically omitting all the sexism and moid behavior that's making us (or at least me) crave this idealized version of a moid that just isn't found in reality. I find myself getting jealous every time a woman brags about her bf and how happy she is with him, but I know that if I were in that situation I probably wouldn't be able to put up with a man's sexism, entitlement, retardedness and complete lack of a personality in order to get to the good parts (intimacy, gifts, sharing nice moments together).

No. 424018

>>423837
Same for me, I guess it's because it's part of the average female life experience and normie women tend to react harshly when you say you're (voluntarily) single, there's either pity or judgement. I know I'm probably not missing out on anything but I can't help feeling that I'm not "normal" compared to the average woman (but that's just one more thing to the weirdo list).

No. 424082

I'm scared of other women irl, I think they are always judging my looks and thinking about how ugly I am.
I can only interact with them on internet because they aren't seeing my face.
After being bullied by other girls in school, all my friends were boys and ever since I can't trust women.
Not even therapy can't fix it, and I honestly just want to give up.

No. 424087

>>424082
I have also given up especially since it’s all based on intangible “vibes” and not anything you actually do or say. I’m just over it.

No. 424089

I hate my female trauma so much but I think I'm slowly getting over it. I'm working with a woman who is very much a Stacey type A personality go-getter, which is not me at all. But we both are passionate about our goals and have been working together. I have this paranoia that she senses my weakness though and looks down on me or is trying to prey on my insecurities, and convinced myself that since she's got this personality she's a secret sociopath. Which is totally unfounded on my part. She's great and I look up to her a lot. My BPD ass just tells me that all women are secretly plotting to sabotage me. But I also feel a sense of comfort knowing that we both are the only ones who get shit done and that the moids we have to deal with are whiny pieces of shit who have their thumbs up their asses all day. So I'm trying my best to get over it and tell myself I'm just being a retard. I don't want to get hurt again.

No. 424092

>>423573
>so many naively accept gender identity beliefs and are TIFs. I wish I could look past that but I just can't.
Ugh same, I hate this. I hate how prevalent the gender ideology BS is with women. I participate in hobby groups and when I look at their socials, it's full of trans support. If these people found out what I really think, I'd be shunned. It's ridiculous that not wanting men to flash women or beat them up is considered "radical and bad". Clown world.

No. 424100

I am/was a loner for most of my life. Growing up, I didn't share interests with girls in school. I spent a lot of time around my older brother, so I developed a lot of the same interests as him and had more of a rough, goofy personality. I had male friends when I was young, but around puberty they all felt weird having a girl as a friend, so I ended up alone. I changed from a happy, extroverted, funny kid to a quiet daydreamer. I used to be really lonely as a child. I still remember in elementary school, I called every girl in my class to invite them to a sleepover, and they all said no. I ate lunch alone. By middle school, I was actively bullied by everyone because I was quiet and unattractive. Boys asked me out as a joke. Girls would physically and mentally abuse me. I was still an outcast in high school, but I developed an edgy personality to cope with the bullying, so I was mostly left alone by then. By college, it somehow got worse, with women starting rumors about me despite me never having interacted with them. My sin was being quiet.
I do have one friend I get along with now, but it's more of a professional relationship so I'm wary about getting too close to her. I used to yearn for close friendships, but after being distant from real people for so long, and after many failed friendships with people online, I've gotten over the desire to have friends. I also feel a lot less lonely after getting a boyfriend, even though I haven't met him in person yet. Now I just want to get married, buy a house, and start a family.

No. 424284

In general I feel much more comfortable around other women but I'll never be able to relate to how so many women enjoy objectifying themselves for random stranger scrotes, especially in public where they're not even getting paid or whatever unlike online attention whoreing outlets. In a way I still find that gross and pickme-ish though. It's depressing that first wave and second wave feminism fought for women to be seen as more than just pieces of meat and now so many women enjoy acting like that and promote themselves as being that and nothing more. Liberal feminism is probably the worst thing that ever happened after the Y chromosome coming into existence.

No. 424825

>>424284
I’ve never enjoyed self objectification or trying to look sexy to strangers either because it requires you to look at yourself through the male gaze and I’ve never once felt any urge to do that in the slightest kek. Why would I? Honestly I think it’s a form of self flagellation and mental illness. Probably some vestigial urge to compete for resources, but the fact is most men are ugly broke trash losers not worth a damn, and the ones who are rich are also ugly, degenerates or are stingy as hell and only give you as much money as you could have made for yourself anyway, so what’s the point?

Although it sounds snobbish, I genuinely view women who go out of their way to impress and please men as being unevolved and retarded. Something is wrong with them. Men are objectively terrible creatures, and these women know it, so the same women actually going to extreme efforts to look good for them is so strange and self defeating to me. I’m not saying you have to dress like a slob, gain weight or never wear makeup, but I frankly find trying to appeal to men absolutely pathetic and will never understand the women who go so far to do it ie extreme diets and excessive gym time, dangerous plastic surgeries and body modification, wearing uncomfortable clothing, spending massive amounts of money on unnecessary grooming or procedures etc.

Notice how the women who put the most effort into looking good almost never have attractive boyfriends or husbands either, they’re always with some overweight repulsive looking schlubby soiboi or roidpig. I’ve never once seen a ‘Stacy’ with her boyfriend and thought ‘I wish I could get a guy like that’

No. 424827

>>424825
Also I hate when women say ‘I’m just doing it for myself’ like yeah whatever you say lol. ‘Myself’ has become synonymous with the male voyeur living in women’s heads rent free.
The brainworms of female heterosexuality go that deep. I suppose trying to rationalize being attracted to the gender that commits nearly all sex crimes, violent crimes, terrorism, wars, etc is already so insane and a form of mental illness in itself, not surprising some women decide to go push the boat out with the pickmeism, masochism and desperation. Most people are also fucking morons and so will never analyze or deconstruct their own behavior. Pickmes and moids have that in common.

No. 425069

>>420993
I needed to read this. Thank you

No. 425071

>I suppose trying to rationalize being attracted to the gender that commits nearly all sex crimes, violent crimes, terrorism, wars, etc is already so insane and a form of mental illness in itself
Agreed that sex crimes and violent crimes are bad but what is wrong with terrorism and war? I don't believe in judging people because of what they do for work(bait)

No. 425642

File: 1724044785205.jpeg (8.94 KB, 172x292, images.jpeg)


No. 425646

>>424825
>>424100
Based. I wish I knew more women like this. The most I do for “myself” is stay healthy. Women acting like spending thousands in their lifetime to look good for scrotes is for “”themselves”” pisses me the fuck off. God even when I read about the anons on here getting plastic surgery to be attractive it makes me lose respect for the majority of women, someone wanted a bbl for fucks’ sake KEK. Clowns. I hate how it’s lonely being sane. unfortunately I’m not even straight so it’s even worse not being able to relate to these women. then again maybe it’s worst to be a lone sane straight women who is attracted to men but has some self-respect, when no one else does. seems like troonfuel.

No. 425658

>>424089
>My BPD ass just tells me that all women are secretly plotting to sabotage me
Sorry if its for BP thread but I never really show anyone my true colors because i know if somebody will know my true feelings towards politics i will be torn apart as women arent allowed to have these views. Women always have to watch closely and think twice before they speak because they are not allowed to be morally unpure. Unfortunately other women are prone to tearing each other apart for a faint illusion of authority.

No. 425669

>>425646
>I read about the anons on here getting plastic surgery to be attractive it makes me lose respect
I don't see how you cannot get plastic surgery for yourself, especially as a woman. Having an attractive face is crucial for surviving in this world as a woman. I'm a lesbian but I would get plastic surgery if I could, not for attracting men but for having better life conditions

No. 425671

>>425669
No it's not. Unless you have a job in the media then you don't need cosmetic surgery to "survive" kek. Go outside and meet some of the many average looking or fat women who are doing just fine despite not being beautiful.

No. 425686

>>425669
Retard. What do you think getting a nose job is going to get you? Maybe some people treating you nicer or giving you more opportunities? Even with the absolute best results it’d be no different from being someone who has good connections, for example. You could sleep your way up and get similar results kek. People like you who shill abominable misogynistic practises like this are disgusting and exactly why I can’t stand normie women.

No. 425689

>>425671
I wasn't talking about average looking women.
>>425686
> it’d be no different from being someone who has good connections
You need a nice face for that.
>People like you who shill abominable misogynistic practises like this are disgusting and exactly why I can’t stand normie women.
Those misogynistic practices helps mamy women to have a career, degree, job, friends, opportunities, a life. You either play this game or smell your shit. I'm not a normie also

No. 425694

>>425689
You’re just the perfect little subservient plaything for the patriarchy aren’t you? Just keel over and mutilate your face if that’s what you really want. But it’s not normal. I don’t know how you can promote it like it’s in good faith.

No. 425713

>>425669
This makes no sense, if you don't have any goals or initiative you can't just sit there and look pretty and have everything brought to you. Unless you want to waste the time you could've been studying for a good job and instead washing a rich scrote's shit stains until he dumps you for the next one.

No. 425778

>>425669
>>425689
nonna you're perfectly correct about how pretty privelage is the difference between a woman being treated like human and a subhuman, just ignore the retards that treat women like gender traitors for noticing beauty is basically a currency for women in society even if you're not straight or stay unmarried (whether nlogs who are above it all like it or not). tangentially related, im really tired of most female spaces devolving into a circlejerk about how they're better than a strawman of what (normie or morally unapproved) women are like. exhibit A on why those women can't establish IRL relationships with women ig kek

No. 425785

>>425669
>im a lesbian but would have a nose job to survive in this world
show us where the hettie brainworms entered your body…

No. 425787

>beauty is basically a currency for women in society
It's only currency if you're talentless, stupid and have nothing else to rely on.

And even then, most beautiful women get treated like shit by moids and society in general. I don't know a single Stacy who hasnt been CSA'd, abused, cheated on, raped.
Being pretty didn't do shit for Amber Heard's image or reputation. Female supermodels, actresses and talent all get sexually harassed and raped by moid execs. The prettiest women in the world are currently being cucked by their F1 boyfriends with hideous transsexual hookers or eating poop out of some Saudi man's asshole. Please stop pretending that being attractive is a cheat code for anything more than temporary attention and sometimes money in exchange for getting raped, it's a rigged game that's designed to never let women win.

No. 425802

>>425787
>Stacies are the real victims
This gaslighting gets old yawn
>I don't know a single Stacy who hasnt been CSA'd, abused, cheated on, raped.
Do you really believe that ugly women/girls are not getting raped? Or less likely to? Wow, you must really have a fucked up mind. You're a disgusting vile person. İ hope those stacies pay you for this shit, you plain face

No. 425809

>>425802
wow. you have issues. nayrt but she said literally none of that. take your meds.
>>425778
>pretty privelage is the difference between a woman being treated like human and a subhuman
im ugly, dont wear makeup, dont shave, and am well liked by all my coworkers, my boss, have friends, have sex and date, travel, etc etc. you sound like incels when you talk about beauty being the make or break for happiness and success in society. stop trying to validate your pathetic somatic obsession and vanity by doomposting about how ugliness ruins your life. it really doesnt.

No. 425810

>>425802
>do you really believe that ugly women/girls are not getting raped?
when did she say that in her post

No. 425811

>>425809
Nta but why are you even in this thread if your life is so perfect, did you just come here to fight?

No. 425813

>>425811
my life isnt perfect weirdo. never said that. being ugly just isnt a fucking death sentence. its also hard to relate to women who think being ugly is literally the worst thing that can ever happen to you, and spend thousands of dollars and hours of their time trying to meet a male created standard.

No. 425814

>>425809
>nayrt but she said literally none of that
That what she meant.
>im ugly, dont wear makeup, dont shave, and am well liked by all my coworkers, my boss, have friends, have sex and date, travel, etc etc
You're not ugly then kek.
>you sound like incels when you talk about beauty being the make or break for happiness and success in society.
It does. No amount of denial and gaslighting going to change it
>>425810
>I don't know a single Stacy who hasnt been CSA'd, abused, cheated on, raped.

No. 425815

File: 1724112246677.jpg (105.27 KB, 1080x1239, eqfoh5lesrtz.jpg)

>>425814
>every pretty woman I know has been raped
>so you don't think ugly women get raped?
esl-chan… take a nap…

No. 425816

>>425813
>its also hard to relate to women who think being ugly is literally the worst thing that can ever happen to you, and spend thousands of dollars and hours of their time trying to meet a male created standard.
Read the OP of this thread, not being able to relate to the <3% of all women who get ps is a non-issue, you didn't come to vent, you only want to pat yourself on the back.
>This thread is NOT for humblebragging about how cool and rational and edgy you are. Please.
That sounds exactly like you.

No. 425820

>>425816
centering your life around your looks is normie shit. you are part of the 99% of women who consoom makeup and beauty procedures. if you truly thought being ugly made life not worth living you would have killed yourself by now. no one is obligated to validate your nihilistic image obsessed view of society.

No. 425848

>>425813
Women like this mald seeing that other women who don’t conform to the patriarchy are happy. It doesn’t fit their narrative.

No. 425849

File: 1724123314387.jpeg (41.15 KB, 500x375, IMG_5293.jpeg)

People are saying that trying to adhere to normie standards is normie shit, but unless you are a neet, you are forced to mingle with them every single day, especially if you work and go to school. I really wish i could just be myself, but i want a job and the easiest life possible. Being me is not going to get me that. I have to leave who i truly am behind closed doors, an autistic woman who truly has very little interest in others and is borderline sociopathic because empathy was always something i have to learn rather than acquire naturally. If you look at ugly women who manage to thrive, they have very good personalities, very socially capable and are pleasant people. I do not have these traits so i'd rather at least fake beauty so normies can have one less thing to bother me about, aside from the fact that i am generally just a perfectionist and i am obsessed with my image, even if i have zero intention on getting any scrote attention which may be hard to believe, but i don't blame anons for thinking that. I've always admired normie women who are as dull as a white wall but get by on just being pretty and smiling every now and then. It must be nice to live a life where nobody demands much of you. For as much as this is considered a normie problem, i've vented about dissatisfaction about my looks with normie women and they just hit you with the everybody is beautiful bullshit. I can't help but wanting doors that were always shut for me to be open. I don't care if it makes me shallow. But i am also painfully aware that if i lived on my own on a deserted island i wouldn't have these thoughts. I would love nothing more but to live in total isolation tbh, every single life problem i've ever had would just melt away. I feel like there is no solution that is viable except suicide sometimes.

No. 425861

the women at my corporate job who follow the life script (marriage, kids) are often unpleasant towards me a childfree single. Do these types of women look down on me as a sad spinster or envy my freedom?

No. 425901

>>425861
Envy 100%. Misery loves company and they hate that you're not tied down to a post-wall scrote with kids that take up all your time and money. Even worse, you don't sound mad about it.
I worked with women like that in the past, they're the most bitter micromanaging assholes on the planet, the sort who'd be troons if they hadn't signed up to be wholesome tradwives instead. Don't bother trying to get into their good graces, be polite and friendly and ignore all the bitchy comments, because they're really just mad at themselves.

No. 425907

>>425861
>They have kids, I don't, that's why they must hate/envy me!
That's such a weird train of thought. And all of them too? Maybe you're just an unpleasant person to be around or a shit worker? Maybe you're not friends because you just don't share much in common and are conflating that with being disliked?

I'm not saying it's not possible, there's plenty of young mothers and older married women who're disillusioned with married life and motherhood, but without further context that explains and justifies your train of thought, it just seems like insecurity about your lifestyle from your side, not theirs.

No. 425931

>>425907
You sound like a naive redditor.

No. 425938

>>425907
>t. Envious mother

No. 425967

>>425907
ok, r/breakingmom

No. 426923

>>425849
I relate to this so much, please don't be so hard on yourself. The best thing you can do is embrace yourself for who you are, no amount of pretty is going to change who you are inside.
This sounds silly but I see life now almost like a rpg where I have fun playing the game of acting like a normie? I've forced myself to socialize a lot and realized that most people aren't constantly analyzing how they act and how others see them like we do. So for me, I've learned how to read people quite well and quite often if you see people need help with something or look bored/like they want to talk, they'll react positively if you offer to help/ make some lighthearted chitchat. I know you said you don't have the traits to be extremely socially capable, but I didn't think I did either. When I learned that I can actually strike up a conversation with most people quite easily my social anxiety got a lot better and I gained more confidence.
As far as appearance related stuff goes, I'm not going to deny the halo effect but if you can find a way to enjoy doing it, and making it low maintenance that will help. Like I reframed doing my hair/makeup/nails as working on a quick art project that I get to show off in public, not as something "I have to do to fix my insecurities". Same with picking out cute outfits, its like recreating a mood board irl?
Finally, I'd say one of the biggest things that turned my life around was finding ways to turn my special interests into strengths, not just quirks about me. I try to incorporate my interests into my life in ways that make me a more well rounded person, and I've made a ton of friends because they have at least one interest in common with me.

No. 427035

Anyone hate how self-sacrificing and "altruistic" normie women are? Being selfish and self centered is the worst crime you can commit. You're supposed to care about your family, your coworkers, an hypothetical moid (partner) before you even consider yourself.
They always take their suffering as a point of pride and say it's a mark of womanhood, what a fucking cope. Of course since it's a mark of womanhood if you aren't serving as a doormat you're either "childish" or very "male-like".
I also hate when some radfems and women on this website also fall for that shit and take it as a point of pride being "empathetic" and "kinder" than moids. I was always selfish so the whole "women are naturally kinder uwu shit doesn't really resonate with me, that's the shit I was told as a kid because I didn't wanna share with a moid who didn't wanna share with me either.

No. 427046

>>427035 It used to make me so actively crazy with anger to watch older female relatives be quietly keeling themselves over to sustain the needs of (primarily, if not entirely) their moid partners and offspring. I don't understand how they don't explode with all the frustrations they must have pent up. I'd have gone postal. I do not consider it a point of pride to be taken for granted at the expense of my own health, time and energy.

No. 427062

>>427035
>>427046
they do it because they are selfish actually but in a very fucked up way it's hilarious. don't get angry, they get what they want out of it. it's just not what you would want. codependents and covert narcs are really gross. Women who behave like this are actually the most selfish and cunning and that's why they project onto the ones who do what they want that they are selfish to distract from their manipulative ways

No. 427066

>>427035
It's a façade, anon. Normie women are aware that shits stupid, they are just extremely performative and gaslight other women around them into believing this shit, specially if you are younger. Many toxic (female) coworkers projected into me telling me I'm "difficult to deal with" over small reasonable requests they had to do cause the law itself said so, specially when I've tried to point out politely how full of shit they were. Stick to your Radfem friends and avoid these assholes as much as possible, they are a waste of time to deal with

No. 427068

>>425861
They envy you anon, 100%. Moids nowadays are porn addict psychopaths who prey into the mass media induced paranoia normie women have of "dying alone" to secure a bang maid that makes them money, and they are just realizing they were memed into being house slave AND the bread winner to a moid they barely can stand, and that raising a kid that can talk back to you and can point out the stupid shit you do isnt like having a cat or a dog that are mostly just content with being well fed and scratches.

Just smile n nod whenever they come to you with any bullshit. Maybe learn some techniques to deal with difficult people perhaps, not worth of anyone's time.

No. 427069

>>425907
Found the boymom bangmaid

No. 427077

>>425938
>>427069
Wrong, I'm very fortunate to be childless and CF.

No. 427079

>>427035
>Anyone hate how self-sacrificing and "altruistic" normie women are?
YES oh my god. i've always been so annoyed by this. i saw it in my family, with my mother doing everything to run the household, and my retard dad decided he was too depressed to work and quit his job. so mom is fully supporting him and working full time, paying all the bills and for the house, while also doing his laundry and bringing him meals. she still waits on both my father and my retarded brother who is 18 and refuses to get a job. my mother pays for both my brother's school and gives him the spending money he whines at her to give him. imagine living your entire life basically as an unpaid domestic laborer and also paying for your two leeches. i work & support myself obvi and i got my uni tuition to basically nothing (scholarships) and i'm so glad, because if i had to ask my mom for money i would feel so horrible. and she basically has no time or money left for herself, to do things she wants to do.
when i talk about this with my mom she tells me that i don't understand what it's like to be a wife and mother, and that she's happy to do this because she loves them so much and wants them to be happy. she really does love being a mom, but the thing that gets me is that obviously im capable of taking care of myself, and i love my mom and want HER to be happy which is why i dont fucking drain her bc im too lazy to do shit. so im like why the fuck cant they stop inconveniencing you and do stuff for your sake, and she tells me its the wife's job to take care of everybody. and she thinks that ill understand it when i get married and have kids, lmao. this just makes me really not want to do those things because i cant imagine my life and personhood just being reduced to this self-sacrificial doormat thing giving up all my freedom and dreams so i can exist to support retarded lazy incompetent men. im wondering how long this will continue bc my dad has been refusing to get a job for 1 year and my brother is shit at university and nearly failing his classes. if they intend on freeloading forever, god forbid when my mother passes away i have no idea what they will fucking do, because i sure as hell wont do this for them.

No. 427083

>>427079
my mother did everything in the house and after she died my father can't even make a simple meal and is unwilling to learn and eats canned foods with plain pasta lol didn't clean the toilet until he had to fucking replace it because it became uncleanable

No. 427414

I'm the type of sperg where it isn't really obvious until you really get to know me/talk to me a lot. I had some trouble at my job fitting in (all much older women, and there was clear resentment/feeling I didn't "deserve" to be there) but I worked my ass off and tried to prove my worth and being helpful and friendly. Some time later, I get targeted really bad by my boss and people are sympathetic and understanding. Fast forward again and she is making my life a living hell, and seems to be even getting in the way of relationships I had with people who she knows like me. Now, I get a meeting with HR telling me I've been reported by "several" coworkers, and it's all people who I thought liked me. I don't feel like I can trust anyone ever again and I feel so stupid for thinking my coworkers actually liked me.

No. 427497

Why do I attract frenemies? Seriously, most friends I've had eventually tried to make me feel bad about myself for no real reason (that I can think of). Whenever I confront them all I get is 'gee anon stop being so sensitive', I can not stand it anymore. It's so immature, I'm in my twenties and I really don't know why it keeps happening because it's some high school shit. At this point I'd rather be a loner than try anymore, whenever I try I end up getting hurt. I'm so tired of being walked all over, I won't let it happen to me anymore even if I'll probably be alone forever. Moids are no company, even just one good female friend would mean the world to me. I wish my old best friend hadn't become a criminal, she knows more about me than anyone even my parents. Just to have a friendship like that again, I've been thinking about her a lot but she blocked me and probably hates me for dropping her but we had such a true connection even if it wasn't always the healthiest.
>>427414
I'm so sorry anon, that sounds horrible. I guess I don't really have advice but I can imagine how much that hurts, I always thought bullying would end in adulthood but no. Can I ask what type of job it was? If it's a dead end one the people there are probably unhappy and trying to cope by taking their frustration out on you, happened to my old coworker too and me as well (I quit after half a year because I couldn't stand all the gossip and petty drama). People are fucking mean.

No. 427506

>>427414
That's horrible. I had something similar happen at an entry level hospital job, those low level medical field jobs and legal jobs seem to be magnets for women with the personality you're describing.

No. 427507

>>427062
>>427066
I am quite aware of that, they are like that towards other women yet with moids they are always doormats and shit, and paint themselves as oh so sacrificial. They're always sabotaging themselves.
But there's also that one brand of women I had as a friend who is always self-sacrificing without being manipulative, they always run back to their abusers or people who exploit them. They fear even being thought of as "selfish" in even one interaction.

No. 427513

>>427497
You could say that if it keeps happening to you you're the common denominator and being attracted to certain type of person or causing these situations with behavior you're not aware of. But honestly people these days are generally really shit thanks to social media and the general landscape so don't be to hard on yourself.

No. 427521

>>427497
Thank you nona. It is a dead end job but I just got a better job offer that pays more! The timing is crazy lol
>>427506
Yeah. It says something when all the coworkers my age aren't there long. It's probably not personal but I definitely made myself an easy target.
>>427497
>even if it wasn't always the healthiest.
I think that's the key here. Do you get into friendships quickly?

No. 430310

almost 30 and incredibly desperate for a female friend who shares my interests. i'm going insane. i just matched with a tranny on bumble bff and accidentally sent a few messages back and forth before i realized and i'm filled with rage. being a 4chan pickme during my formative years, the only other girls i was friends with in highschool were also pickmes and thus terrible friends. i just want a based terf queen bestie, i hate men so much.

No. 431543

Rejecting beauty culture but not being a gendie about it is such a lonely experience. Other women can be so cruel for no reason over it. It's like their brains fucking break
and they have to rage at you or be catty if you talk about actually not doing beauty rituals if you hate them and think they're unfair. I tried making friends with radfems but a lot of them are weirdly normie and spiteful and also act like the feminism police (I'm not even a radfem, just a normal feminist who is gender critical) and of course TIFs make terrible friends and are usually annoying as fuck.

No. 431555

think the worst part about trying to make friends with other women as a social retard is that you might share pretty much every interest or view except one thing and that on thing is what drives them away, what happened to just accepting the other party…why is it always all or nothing

No. 431570

Women can be so cold nonnies… I’m really jealous of how easy moids can make friends with one another. All it takes is for them to find common ground with one another (like wearing the same shirt), or both of them are drunk (drunk women are either even more guarded, or they’re tryna make out with you) and all of a sudden they’re besties.

Hell even 2 moids who had a fight the previous day can somehow act like brothers the next if they made up and settled their differences. That NEVER happens when women get into a catfight with one another. Women will beef with each other for life kek.

No. 431574

>>431570
I hate the 'drunk women being besties in the bathroom' meme so much kek.

No. 431603

>>431574
This. Where does this happen? I’ve never witnessed it myself. Most of the time a drunk girl going to the bathroom is accompanied by a (more) sober friend. There’s no socializing in the bathroom between completely drunk strangers, people just go in, do their business and go.

No. 431995

>>431603
Not ayrt, but the last time I went out with the bf and friends, I wound up having a solid conversation in the bathroom with some of the women in there after making sure one of the older ones was doing okay. All were pretty far into drinks and in good nature, so it’s not totally out of the realm.

No. 432286

Lol I got linked this thread today with the message "I can't believe some women feel like this".
Y-yeah m-me too, haha…

No. 432290

>>432286
Normies will never get it.

No. 432386

>>432286
Having to pretend with people like that is soul draining. I hope you aren't friends with her.

No. 432591

>>432286
Well, if the person who sent you this lurks here they will most likely figure out you're the one who posted this

No. 434074

>>434072
I’m sorry about the waffle joke, I was trying to lighten the mood.

No. 434111

>>434072
Everyone in this thread is a woman. Yes, being a woman is inherently more lonely, but it doesn't mean you should kill yourself. Write public blogs, make art, write stories, put yourself out there. I'm serious. You'll never meet like-minded women if you're hiding your entire life. The loneliness will vanish as soon as you give up on playing along with normie bullshit.

No. 434685

>>434111
You're stupid af

No. 434994

File: 1727995024118.jpg (195.53 KB, 700x700, MC-0600-2.jpg)

Anyone else feel like they spent too much time surrounded by retarded autistic nonsense ("those of us who spent our formative years on 4chan/other male dominated spaces and got internet poisoning from it") to truly fit in with normies but has also matured and stabilized enough to no longer relate to online losers? Like being in this limbo where you have an abnormally high awareness of the culture of rejects and degens but don't personally engage in it (anymore).

I feel awkward engaging with most people because my upbringing wasn't normal and I feel like I don't have the prerequisite context to connect with people. For instance I didn't have any friends the whole time I was growing up (early childhood thru teen years) and developed extensive knowledge of stupid niche online spergery instead of typical experiences for a girl. I am doing a lot of basic stuff, like getting lunch with a friend or even just having an extensive conversation with someone, for the first time, which is exciting but also makes me feel a lot like a fish out of water. There are a lot of times where I subtly don't fit in and come across as very puzzling or esoteric although people generally like me, because we don't relate to each other. I have a hard time knowing what to talk about because don't have a wealth of normal experiences to draw back on, so I think I end up settling on a kinda limited range of topics and not actually opening up much.

On the other hand, I have made a ton of progress in conquering my mentally ill and neurotic behaviors and I don't think I really qualify as even having any mental illnesses anymore. I am generally content with life. I am not longer a NEET (although I just have a wagie job), am in a healthy long-term relationship, and also got over all the weird and dumb sexual stuff. So I'm not in the same spiraling camp as most other people who started out like me.
It feels weird thinking about how usually people don't get out of that sort of rut, or at least I never hear about it so I have no model of reference, I guess. Mostly when I see people who were in the position I was, they just end up getting worse and worse. I want to keep improving my life but I'm struggling to adjust to normal social interaction and there have been times where I accidentally let slip something strange or stupid. Not sure how to describe this but especially around women I feel like they're so much neater and more polished than me in some nebulous figurative way, where I grew up in the gutter surrounded by filth they have zero concept of… Maybe I'm just self-conscious about it but I feel like it shows.

I guess I'm just shooting this out there to ask if anyone else is in the same boat of having been in a really dark place, not even in a profound way but just a retarded way, and crawled out of the pit?

No. 435058

>>434994
you have a unique perspective on life compared to those that spent their whole life either blissfully unaware of the privilege of their belonging and identifying with dominant culture vs. a pessimistic shut-in that failed to overcome or sublimate his self-pitying depression

No. 435065

>>434994
Yeah, me. I despise all the pointless hate "us based weirdo autists" throw at "le normies". But I'm not exactly what you'd call a "normie" either because being an unfeminine girl in the first place, then growing up on the internet and specifically 4chan and surrounded by moid shit, has totally ruined my ability to connect with more normal women in a significant way in real life. However, that doesn't mean I should stop interacting with women or reject the idea of a friendship with them. Yes, I was bullied by the popular girls at some point but I guess I didn't become obsessed enough with that to think all women that aren't as weird as me are like that. (Plus it looks like those bullies felt bad about it later when they grew up.) There are all kinds of women in the world, not just the mean hyperfeminine normie bullies that made your life hell. There are "normie" women that are nice, there are "weird" women that are incredibly shitty people. There are "normies" that are actually just mentally ill or have severe issues in their life, and they do not represent all women.
I don't know why you all fixate so much on that normie/non-normie distinction and fight so hard to keep yourselves in a position of victimhood based around that. You might not fit society's definition of "normal" but you can overcome those difficulties and you don't even have to stop being yourself (where the fuck did this idea even come from, that to be a functional member of society you have to "become a normalfag" and give up everything you like or adopt and entirely new personality? I feel like those who actually believe this are just NEETs or new ex-NEETs that barely reach the age of 21 and rarely leave their house while staying on the internet 24/7)

No. 435068

>>434994
Wow, I was literally thinking about this yesterday. Honestly, I'm too retarded for the normies but too normie for the retards. I'm stuck in this nebulous grey area. Very annoying and isolating

No. 435070

>>434994
Yeah, I relate quite a lot to what you say and I get what you mean about now feeling kind of self-conscious or awkward around women, but as cliche as it may sound the only thing you can do is work a bit on your confidence. See, most adult sane women don't overthink that much about other people. Even if you have some little quirks or say something unusual sometimes, if they like you it's fine, they probably find you interesting, cool or fun. And if they don't like you that much, it's fine too, they're going to be polite, just as you try to be polite with people you don't like that much. I did struggle with neurotic behaviors too so I know it's hard to break those patterns, but realizing that I am an ok person and that sane people don't overthink as much as I did nor make a big deal about some stupid little interaction, was relieving.
Oh, and I also realized that I have so so much more in common with any woman ("normie" or not), even if we don't share interests, than with those retarded online moids. As long as they are nice, I can feel perfectly comfortable around them now.
So yeah, it's ok to feel a bit scared around women now, but don't worry, you seem to be in a good place and you'll overcome it.

No. 435071

>>435065
Yep, the normie/weirdo loser dichotomy doesn't make sense a lot of the time. Normies get bullied, le based autist weirdos bully (a lot), people can hit social milestones like dating or first [] early but still be deeply embedded in niche corners and behave in strange ways, etc. When it comes to women it's even blurrier because the threshold for acceptance by female peers is lower, moral/social policing by everyone is higher and it happens in 'weird' girl circles too. Legitimately autistic/unwell girls would get crucified every other day in places like tumblr, at the hands of slightly less odd (but still mentally ill) girls.

No. 435407

>>435058
this is a very strangely encouraging and reassuring framing, thank you
>>435065
>>435068
>>435070
I'm glad to hear that it resonated with some others. It's an awkward state to be in but at the end of the day I want to remember that it's a blessing that I didn't just keep sinking further and further down, it's a wonderful thing to have the opportunity to be a little awkward and work on figuring stuff out. I'm trying to kick my inclination to either think I'm totally cut off from society or overcorrect and be in denial thinking that I'm perfectly average. The balanced perspective on this I think is that I may be quite different from others in many ways but I can still connect with them in meaningful ways.
>>435071
you are right but also
>Legitimately autistic/unwell girls would get crucified every other day in places like tumblr, at the hands of slightly less odd (but still mentally ill) girls.
is a fairly apt description of the purpose of this site kek

No. 435539

>>435070
Same! For years I hid away from other women/girls because I was scared, and the only female friends I’d had at school were stereotypically bitchy types who hated me deep down. In recent years I’ve found that most women are lovely and kind; some are cruel but that’ll be obvious, and their lives are so shallow I wouldn’t want to be their friend anyway. Even in my extremely normie workplace I’m friendly with pretty much all of the women, and talking to them, seeing them smile etc feels much more rewarding than listening to moids screech about drinking and fucking 24/7. I can’t believe people dare to call women ‘vapid’ when even the conversations I’ve had with randoms have been v meaningful in a subtle way

No. 435612

>>435539
>>435065
>>434994
What y'all are doing in this thread if you have itty bitty lovely lives where you get along with everyone?

No. 436280

Why do NT women and gay moids care so much about not being perceived as too friendly with men. I honestly don’t see any harm in a man thinking I am flirting with him when I’m not.

No. 436289

>>436280
You've never had some random moid get obsessed with you after one polite encounter and stalk you/say inappropriate things/touch you randomly/send you gross photos/write weird shit/project some craziness onto you/god knows what else?

No. 436295

>>436280
it often directly leads to them acting fucking weird or creepy.

No. 436310

Painfully I feel I as very socialized as masculine. I have six younger brothers, and majority of my friends growing up were males (mainly gay men, we would play Barbie’s together if my brothers didn’t already destroy my toys.). Now as a college adult I try so hard to make female friendships. I’ve had female friendships, but I only have 2 female friends that I trust fully. Unfortunately I barely see these friends as 1 moved to another state for college and the other one is too busy with her Nigel. I have a Nigel myself so I get it to a degree but I will always make time for my female friends. I’m currently in a groupchat with girls from my STEM class this semester so hopefully I can make more friends.
I have noticed whenever I’ve been nice to men, it’s been more damaging to my life than good. As a kid being nice to boys didn’t get me that much trouble as it progressively got in high school to now. Now when I’m nice to a moid he tries joking about trying to get me to cheat on my boyfriend, how I’m “smarter” than other women, how I’m “not like other girls” and other weird grooming comments. It makes me feel sick to my stomach that something changes in the male brain to where they can’t perceive normal opposite sex friendships. My friendships with gay males have changed too, they are just as weird. One gay male asked if I would be willing to carry his child one day, I told him I’m not a womb to rent out and he got mad at me.
My piece of advice for nonnas on here is if you can afford it; go to college. Learn something in STEM, it’s now having a lot more women in the field and they’re just as autistic or mentally ill. It’s how I’ve been able to find women I can somewhat relate too and I can have an actual interesting conversation with based on shared interests.

No. 436321

>>436280
Gay men do not want to be accused of being a predator, women don't want to be accused of leading on men or making them think they are romantically interested in men. It's really about preserving your peace of mind in both instances and trying to avoid conflict. I for one don't understand why you would think it's a good thing, i'd be mortified if some moid thought i had a crush on him just because i was friendly. They tend to be incredibly cruel when it comes to rejecting women who are unattractive because they don't have to walk on eggshells with women the way we have to with moids, they could get really angry in this situation.

No. 436324

>>434994
I find this utterly unrelatable because i have autism meaning i will be stuck in this pit till the day i die. The only thing is that i never used 4chan outside cgl because i don't have a desire to try and fit in with moids because i don't feel like i belong. The only time i have ever felt like i belong is when i am among other autistic women who understand how my mind works and have a similar perspective to life to me. If anything, trying not to be a normie is that only way i'll ever be happy.

No. 436355

File: 1728552497002.jpeg (35.72 KB, 227x222, IMG_4492.jpeg)

Long Time lurker checking in to say. I caved and took the male friends pill. Inb4 but they’re only pretending to be nice and it’s not a real friendship. Idc I will simply replace them with others if they leave. If I managed to make female friends then I do, if not then oh well. I am tired of trying.

No. 436356

>>436355
I will die on the hill that male/female friendship is possible since my best friend is a guy and he definitely isn't attracted to me.

No. 436359

>>436355
Male friends are great as long as you keep them at arms length. That way it doesn’t matter too much if they’re attracted to you. I’ve always felt awkward and self conscious around a lot of women my own age because I was bullied, I feel like i can be myself around males because I don’t really care what they think as much. I’d rather hang around people who are weird and defective like I am, I just feel so much more comfortable.

No. 436385

I feel like I have artificial autism because I grew up completely alone and on the early internet/imageboards, so I constantly come across as awkward even though I want to connect with normie women.

It becomes painful in places like work where over time I find myself being excluded from my female colleagues get-togethers because I cannot relate.

Wish I could befriend another nonna in the wild and be weirdos together instead of having to be so self conscious.

No. 436407

File: 1728574724909.jpg (50.83 KB, 564x560, scremainglady.jpg)

My worse barrier with befriending women is the photo taking. Especially in friend groups they want to post on social media if we're doing something fun, and I'm really self conscious on my looks nor do I want to be posted online. Especially when you know there's always creepy scrotes lurking. I get seen as strange when I try to set boundaries I just already am stepping out of my comfort level being with others it gets so overwhelming. Then my brain doesn't want me to go out anymore because I don't feel safe. It's really just a me problem because for my internships and university you get your photos taken as well and it always ruins my day.

No. 436408

>>436385
You don't have to relate actually! Just work on being authentic and relaxed about yourself. If you go out more often to more varied gatherings, you will find that people tolerate very weird behaviors and often find them cool as long as the person displaying them is self aware and confident in who they are.

No. 436484

>>436356
friendship isn't possible

No. 436570

>>436355
>>436356
I've had multiple male friends who were definitely, absolutely not attracted to me. Doesn't mean they were always excellent friends but any stupid stuff they did towards me was the same stupid stuff they'd all do to each other and that I'd do back, so it wasn't like I was being treated any differently for being a woman. A lot of guys would explicitly express that they think I'm autistic and then treat me like a dude, with all the positives and negatives of that. There are inevitably ways in which they are hopelessly separated from my experience due to being male but I get that in different ways with women, so I think I need friends of both sexes to check every social desire. I want to focus more on female friends right now however.
>>436359
>I feel like i can be myself around males because I don't really care what they think as much
i relate to this, with men if they think I'm weird or get offended I don't really care. Sometimes I'll kinda gaslight them that it's not me, they just don't get it because they're male. With women I feel more pressure to be appealing to them

No. 436666

>>436570
In my experience with being bullied, a moid will do one thing every now and then like throw a sandwich in your face, push you into a puddle or call you a dyke. Girls will make a sustained and prolonged effort to ostracise and destroy your reputation permanently. Spreading rumours, setting you up to be bullied by even more people. The social consequence of a moid not liking you are much lower. I got bullied by the same group of girls from infant school all the way until secondary, and they’d add new friends to the group and they’d join in. That’s ages 6-13. Hence why I’m shit scared about doing something a woman won’t like or will look down on me for.

No. 436684

>>436666
why the fuck are women like this

why even bother honestly I'm so done. Basically committing myself to celibacy and a life of isolation and self employment

I'm going back to male friend groups if I do make friends again, the weird creepy vibes I get from women are real. they talk about men being creepy but they don't know what each others real face looks like because they paint on a promotional fake face, which is some fucking dreadful dystopian novel bullshit thats I'm supposed to pretend is normal person behavior and not weird freak behavior

No. 436703

>>436684
It is weird. I’m very bitter that I was lucky enough to come from a loving family with well off parents that were still together and I had to be dragged through the mud and used as a punching bag by a bunch of low class failed abortions from broken homes. My parents worked very hard to give me a good life unlike the mothers of the girls’ who bullied me who were welfare queens with a new man every few years who let’s be honest where probably just there so they can have a shot at molesting the daughters. And now those girls are doing much better than I am because they were able to purge all the filth and bile within their souls by tearing me down and they’re able to blam e all of their mistakes on their uwu bad childhood. Meanwhile people use being bullied at school as an insult. I’m just a privileged upper middle class child of loving parents so I have no excuse for being clinically depressed into my 30s. I consider myself a secondhand victim of the disgusting welfare queens that dragged up the nasty little bitches that made my life a misery. If I ever have kids I’m not going to stand for it and if the school won’t help me (just like my school didn’t help my parents when they complained) then I will take them out and homeschool them.

No. 436712

>>436703
I'm also from a "good home", my family wasn't perfect but also was far from what anyone would consider a broken home. I got bullied a lot during childhood too for no discernible reason. I'm doing alright nowadays but when I look back on my memories it seems so hellish and I'm so glad to be an adult, I've never been able to relate to those "zomg nostalgiaaa i miss being a kid it was so easy to make friends!!" sentiments that people post.
>homeschool
I don't have kids right now I'm strongly considering this if the circumstances make it possible. I think I may have some spergy tendencies by nature (based on my dad and grandpa) which I guess kids might've honed in on and targeted… Idk how little girls manage to clock tism with a hawk's eye precision when actual psychs don't notice it at all if you aren't male. I did get diagnosed with something adjacent as a teen. But based on that (and on how my bf is diagnosed autist, he is pretty normie and well-adjusted though and mostly just loves math/languages and does benign weird stuff like sit on the ground, it's not the damaging internet rot I ended up with. he doesn't even use the internet for anything except to look at formulae and ancient greek phonology) I think there's a high chance that any kids I have will be a little different by nature, so I want them to be in an environment where they're supported both academically and socially. Of course homeschooling is a delicate topic so I'd want to put in more research and make sure I can offer something that's genuinely substantial before I decide on it.

No. 436729

The one thing I struggle with is the fact a lot of women I know in my life are high maintenance. Like they focus on stuff like makeup, getting their nails done, hair dyed, skincare routines, etc. I've had numerous friends tell me they wanna do a makeover on me, and like. It's nice, but I sometimes just want to let myself be lazy for an extended period and let my bushy eyebrows stay unplucked. My friends also just assume I'm going to be alone forever, like not directly they think so, but they've alluded to it. I also do care about my fashion choices, but when I make a bold statement, they're like "what happened to you anon?!" It's a push and pull feeling I get

No. 436730

>>436729
they're just projecting their insecurities onto you, they hate the idea that you can exist peacefully without the pressure of constant maintenance. they care more about your physical appearance than any moid would. it's similar to how some women believe women who don't wear makeup are pickmes if they even mention they don't like wearing it.

No. 436766

>>436703
I sincerely hope you're in therapy. I'm sorry you got bullied but you can't be thinking like that, you've poisoned yourself and it's not helping

No. 436797

>>436766
Nah. Actually one of the girls who bullied me became a therapist. Says everything really.

No. 436799

>>436666
why is there so much femcel rhetoric in this thread. back when there was a community that identified as femcels (as opposed to being called a false equivalent by stinky moids), all they would do is blame stacy for all of their problems and even if some were celibate, they would just wait for any run of the mill redditor to send them dick pics. i fucking hate myself as a woman and have moments of kneejerk misogynistic reactions, but pretending women are more harmful than men and men are easier to be around because they don't flaunt their degeneracy in neutral situations/communities? KEK

No. 436800

>>436799
It’s my personal experience. It’s what I’ve lived through. It’s not “femcel rhetoric”. Sorry if it makes you uncomfortable but it’s the truth.
Sorry you hate yourself for being a woman, I can’t relate to that at all. Maybe fuck off and go chop your tits off instead of trying to silence people talking about their personal experience?
Literally all I said was the social consequence of being bullied by girls is worse. “You’re saying women are more harmful!” Yes in this ONE hyper specific scenario and you call it femcel rhetoric. Then you go on to say you hate yourself for being a woman? You’re so pathetic.

No. 436804

>>436799
Go back to pinkpill thread

No. 436806

>>436799
it's not femcel rhetoric to admit women will bully each other in way less aggressive ways that end up having worse social consequences. you sound like one of those bully girls I had in middle school tbh. I bet if it was nowadays they would use 3rd wave feminism to bully me because I wasn't feminine enough I would be "putting down other women just because they are feminine".

No. 436807

>>436355
my best friend is a guy. but to be fair we've known each other for +10 years and I've seen every phase of him, from proto-incel to actual human being. I think our friendship was able to sustain itself because early in 2010s he realized on his own imageboards were detrimental to his relationships with people and dropped them on his own and since we were teens it didn't completely rot his brain. it also worked out in the end because I never told him what to do because I sincerely did not care. the secret to have a good friendship with a man is to not care about them, because most likely they don't really care about your welfare either. it's a different ballgame than to have a friendship with a woman, women care about each other and will even scold each other for treating ourselves badly. nowadays we care about each other but it took a long while for him to realize I am actually his friend not just a "pal". men are emotionally retarded.

No. 436815

>>436484
Why do you say that? I think it's a less than 1% chance, but it's definitely possible.

No. 436816

>>436797
You're not getting what I'm saying. Why keep up with them and what they're doing? Live your own life. You need to move on

No. 436824

>>436666
>a moid will do one thing every now and then like throw a sandwich in your face, push you into a puddle or call you a dyke.
I was bullied by boys in middle school and this is not my experience. They made my life living hell to the point that it felt like they treated me like a troon. Looking back at old class photos, I was one of the prettiest girls in our class and maybe I was a bit developmentally stunted because I was abused at home but I have no idea what I did to deserve this and everyone, including the teachers, ignored it. It spread across different groups and years where I'd get called names and sexually harassed and got my money extorted or stuff destroyed by moids I never even talked to or knew their names or younger ones.

No. 436855

>>436729
I had this annoying classmate in college that really wanted to "thank me" for helping her practice for class with a fucking makeover. She was hyperfeminine and very friendly and ran a small beauty salon business or something. I was repulsed by the idea and tried to politely turn down this "offer" but she wouldn't just let me be and constantly begged me to do it. I now realize that either she just really liked doing makeovers, or was trying to "help me" out of pity (some women just can't wrap their heads around other women not giving a shit about performing femininity and think it must be shyness or some retarded shit)

No. 436856

>>436824
Same. The "cool" boys at my school made my life WAY more difficult than the girls ever did and I legit have no idea why except maybe homophobia.

No. 436880

This thread is about befriending other women.

I don't care to read about moid pets.

They will make misogynistic jokes with their fellow moid friends and always see you as lesser. They will always make a pass eventually or think about doing so. It cannot be compared to a female friendship.

No. 436882

>>436880
>This thread is about befriending other women
No it isn't just about that. Stop gatekeeping a fucking thread on an anonymous internet board

No. 436885

>>436882
>gatekeeping

Posts about befriending moids and convincing others to do the same is objectively off topic. Of course they're "easier" to befriend in the sense of seeing you as potential fuck meat.

No. 436893

You can literally become friends with most women by sperging over makeup and skincare lol

No. 436894

>>436885
You're autistic

No. 436922

I am starting college and i want to make female friends. So far all my friends are scrotes i met playing online games. I would sacrifice all two of them for a woman with a similar autism to mine.

No. 436923

>>436893
But I don't care and do either of those things nonna, thats the problem

No. 436936

>>436893
For me it’s just, are you really surrounded by women who are only like this? Granted they make up the majority but I’ve never had trouble finding my little crew. Even my high school friend group was a clusterfuck of emos, spergy nerds, weebs and edgy imageboard users. Mostly female even. Granted none of them were exactly like me (not as autistic or GNC in personality) but I was really well-liked even. Granted now as adults, most of them are turning into normie women who cake on makeup and while alternative have lost interest in a lot of that stuff, but I’d still be able to talk and get along with them (albeit not close, best friend level) but I still have my internet friends. 90% of fandom women back in the 2000s/2010s were like this too, now it’s less but still most of the chronically online ones. I’ve met with some of them (after years and years, since I knew them in my teens) and two of them are my bestest friends ever. I just feel like you need to have the places to look, yk? There really is no reason to be alone, although maybe in some countries it might be impossible to find irl women like this

I think better than getting along with women in day to day life, is to have a best friend. A friend group is second, and casual friends are basically unimportant. These normie women get along with everyone but I hardly see them form strong close bonds with each other - especially the women who perform for men, it’s all superficial connection based around that common interest. They throw each other under the bus all the time.

No. 436947

>>436936
> are you really surrounded by women who are only like this?
My point was it's a low level entry point to build a friendship. You can expand to other topics or activities over time as you become comfortable around each other. But any other easy common interest will do.

>I think better than getting along with women in day to day life, is to have a best friend.

This is almost impossible to achieve these days and has too many conditions. It's better to have many casual-to-close friends than one best friend, because the chances of finding a person who fits you are very, very slim and even if you find one, if you depend only on one person as part of support system, when she flakes out or starts acting weird because autism or she got a nigel or some other bullshit, then you're left with nobody to spend time with. Best friends are too romanticized and a concept that is unattainable, especially as you become older and seeing how society is progressing it looks to me like something that exists only in novels or anime at this point. And it's really better to get along with as many people as possible, it just makes life easier.

No. 436956

>>436947
>Best friends are too romanticized and a concept that is unattainable
Hearing this is so insane to me wow. I could never go through life without a weird woman I relate to, I’m so unlike most women I’d genuinely have committed suicide by now, 100%. Like I said I have 2 best friends and I had others as a teen/kid but these best friends I’ve had for nearly a decade. Recently I’ve met a new one I click with (through the internet again) even more than these ones and she’s moving here to London from New York so we can see each other more often kek. Maybe it’s because I used to be a NEET but I could never imagine valuing casual friends over these, maybe I’m antisocial but I’ve gone years without that and if anything I felt better.

Guess it depends on you though. If I couldn’t find friends through my interests and beliefs I would probably think similarly to you… Or maybe not. A close connection is probably my favourite thing in the world regardless and probably my biggest reason for living TBH, I can’t think of any other (genuinely what is there to live for?) nothing tops that and I would sacrifice my career over that.
>My point was it's a low level entry point to build a friendship.
I guess this could be a good strategy. Since I’m loudly anti-makeup and generally against performative femininity I don’t think I could pretend personally, but yeah I don’t see why not if you can. When I said best friends Are better than casual friends I do mean it - they are the people who really make you feel seen and normal, care about you as a person. But my point is that if you don’t have this then yes, most people are happier if they have some sort of friendship, casual or not.

No. 436961

>>436956
Not tryna to be mean but
>I’m so unlike most women
>I have 2 best friends and I had others as a teen/kid

kek

No. 436964

>>436961
I have 2 best friends right now as an adult that I met online at 13, and I had three best friends at separate times a young child 2-12 years old. I didn’t stop being ostracised by my classmates because I bonded over video games in fandom spaces kek. And as an adult I am even less like normie women because of my views, and I guess also my mental space… It’s not most women, I relate to the average person very little so yes objectively I am unlike them, and all my best friends (sans the ones before 12) are too - that’s the reason why we bonded in the first place.

No. 436995

I have no idea where to even meet unconventional women. It feels like a lot of the people I meet are either super normie (I try not to mean this in a judgmental way, but I just can't relate or bond with people whose lives revolve around Instagram or whatever) or are weird and different in an unhealthy and dysfunctional way where they'd drag you down (e.g., drug addiction, self-destructive sexual behavior, unchecked mental illness). I want to meet women who simply have some uncommon interests. It doesn't even need to be the same interests, I just want to befriend other women who get the overall experience of not fitting in with the mainstream and who have a more unique perspective that isn't based on fitting in with a broader group, who haven't also turned to spiraling self-hatred. I dunno how to maximalize my chances of meeting such women and random encounters aren't really turning up any matches that stick.

No. 436998

I can't relate to most women because they fuck men or want to fuck them if they aren't actively fucking them already. A woman who has close males in her life will NEVER be trust worthy and objective and safe to be around.

No. 437001

>>436995
It’s crazy how most people are just copy pastes whose top priority is whatever’s the norm. Like the fact that makes up the majority of people fucks me up

No. 437017

>>436666
>>436684
I can relate to this. I was a weird little tomboy as a kid, and when I started middle school in a new school district I wanted to be more of "a girl" and try to make friends with other girls and god, middle and high school was so stressful. I don't know if this is normal or I just had shitty friend groups, but I remember seeing girls act really nice to each other and then immediately make fun of the other girls when they left the room and it always made me so nervous knowing that they probably talked about me, too. And then there were girls who just plain didn't like me for whatever reason that I never figured out, and holy shit the shunning/psychological warfare tactics girls use are so much worse. Boys just outwardly insult each other and then are cool with each other the next day, but the drawn-out rumor spreading and social isolating that girls do is so awful. I want to make more girl friends, but I always feel nervous in the back of my mind when I meet new women because I'm worried I'm going to do something "wrong"

No. 437020

>>436964
Do your friends also use LC?

No. 437021

>>436956
I desperately want a weird woman friend that can relate to me, being on LC is the closest thing I have to that at the moment kek

No. 437027

>>437020
Only one of my best friends do (the other hates imageboards in general) but I have a handful of other friends that do, some of them because I peaked them

No. 437028

>>437021
Sorry for samefagging, yeah it’s so important and I think sometimes it’s hard to retain your individuality otherwise. Tbh though, I think I have a habit of influencing friends since I’m always exchanging interests, so I have 1 or 2 friends who are ex-normie kek. I do think lolcow is a blessing especially in these times.

No. 437041

>>437027
Kill yourself, whore(infight bait)

No. 437046

I’m too perverted.
I really just like sexualizing men.
I can’t relate to most women, with my intensity and frequency. I usually make them uncomfortable.
Even women who are promiscuous, I can’t get along with. They don’t have lust the way I do. I want to want men, to consume men. Most women who “love sex” just love validating themselves through sex, watching themselves through a man’s eyes.
Where are all the women like me? Who want to ravish beautiful men?

No. 437050

>>437046
Idk anon but youre based to me

No. 437058

>>436995
go to places where people engage in unusual interests
>drag you down (e.g., drug addiction, self-destructive sexual behavior, unchecked mental illness)
this is going to be hard, not everyone is lucky

No. 437063

File: 1728816231895.png (1.95 MB, 864x865, bakery build.png)

Just a vent. I love video games, 2d moids and comfy cozy cottage core aesthetics. But I got so disappointed here in lc sometimes, like when some self described gamedev is working on dating sims, and I want more gameplay than text boxes and dating pngs. Likewise anons always focusing on how moids look like in games and stories. Or when the lolcow minecraft server was 90% pink wood. I thought I had relatively feminine tastes but that was just so samey, I haven't felt the need to log on since. I know technical, action rpg nonnies exist, I've seen them in the /m/ threads but they don't play games I play.

No. 437070

>>437063
Which ones do you play?

No. 437076

>>437070
Monster Hunter World at the moment.
>tfw 60k active players and it's hard to find actual women in game.
Also I play building games like Minecraft and Vintage Story but I prefer trying to go for more realistic builds like my earlier picrel, I'm not as good though, kek. My dream is to make an approachable girl rpg game that introduces nonnies to more technical gameplay.

No. 437305

>>437076
I understand how it feels, I often feel lonely in some of my game interests as well. I never played monster hunter, but I'm considering picking it up, is monster hunter world the one you recommend?

No. 437322

>>437305
MHWorld is probably the easiest to get into, but has a relatively high skill ceiling too! It removes a lot of "tedious" aspects of previous games. There's a huge hype train waiting for the release of MHWilds next year February, but even in it's age World holds up pretty well, filled to the brim with content. I do warn that it's still a grindy game though.

No. 437385

>>437046
You've explained it so well. Whenever most women talk about sex, it bores me because it's almost as if they don't even experience sexual attraction, but they more enjoy the feeling of looking sexy/desirable and tempting a moid into losing control over them. Which I couldn't care less about, I'm not looking at myself during sex so why should I give a fuck? I want a sexy cute moid to make me lose control, to make me desire him so much until my mind is only filled with lust for him and can only think about using him for my pleasure.

No. 437407

>>437385
odd because when i've spent time in straight women spaces i've heard them lust openly for dicks, abs etc in a way that was so aggressive it felt exactly like men (only better because men are misogynistic). I couldn't really relate as i'm a lesbian but it was interesting (and kinda offputting kek)

No. 437414

>>437407
It's unfortunate that women didn't have the physical advantages of men. That is literally the only thing differentiating us that allowed for men to control society. Mentally, I don't believe that women are morally superior to men. We're completely capable of doing what they have done to us. I'm sad that we don't live in that reality, with women being the historical oppressors.

No. 437427

>>437063
>want more gameplay than text boxes and dating pngs
That's pretty rude to VN devs and you're ignoring the existence of stat raising elements, map exploration, and management elements that can be quite complex to code and play and are really fun. I play fighting and action games too btw. Also, if you didn't like the pink wood in the server you could've gone to any of the many developed areas that didn't have it or built your own area. I just feel like these things are non-issues kek

No. 437852

I don't like saying this because it makes me sound like the "not like other girls" types who proclaim how different they are because they watch football or something but I genuinely have nothing in common with most girls and they just do not like me. Unfortunately, in addition to my innate personality I also I fall under
>those of us who spent our formative years on 4chan/other male dominated spaces and got internet poisoning from it
When I was 13 I discovered Encyclopedia Dramatica and 4chan which probably fucked up the trajectory of my life (which was bad in the first place, now made worse). I had already been an outcast my whole life and finding "community" there seemed nice at the time but was obviously a terrible move. My interests and fixations are all very male-aligned as well. Also, women tend to be oversocialised and as someone who holds and espouses a lot of "abnormal" views I have learnt that I could say I was a genocidal white supremacist child molestor who was going to shoot up an elementary school for sexual kicks to a man and he could be fine with it but if I say a word wrong to most women they will crucify me - or rather just disgustedly stop talking to me. Of course I could censor myself but I spent years trying to mask the fact I am a terminal sperg and never found acceptance because it just comes off as uncanny, as well as the fact it is exhausting. I'd rather be alone than pretend to be someone I'm not.
I've learnt adult men will never truly see you as a friend and an equal once they know your gender either. In high school I had zero friends in real life but male friends on the internet to whom I either didn't disclose my gender or outright lied that I was male too, but after many years it's frustrating to have to conceal something that to me is so minor but to them is grounds for ruining our friendship completely. There was one guy I knew for almost a year - we both made WADs for Doom and would share them with each other, played other video games together, exchanged messages frequently with what felt to me like genuine friendship - and I am usually hesitant to say that. One day we were going to play a co-op shooter with voice chat for the first time and literally the second I spoke he started going on about how I was female and how he would never have had the sort of conversations we did if he knew I was a girl. We never had a real conversation again after that. This stands out to me as I had really liked him, but variations of the same thing have happened to me numerous times.
I have been a NEET and a shutin for 2 and a half years now and not only have I not had a single conversation with anyone in real life except my mother in that time, I also don't really even have online friends anymore. It seems like even other girls who claim to be in similar situations to me still think I am too weird.
I never had a particularly strong drive to do any of these things but when I see girls have sleepovers, going to the mall, et cetera, I feel so envious that I will never have those experiences of "sisterhood". I have zero desire to go to the mall and would probably rather drive a railway spike through my skull but it's just the principle of it and what it represents. I have always wanted a real female friend so much even though I know gender differences are mostly socialisation.
Sorry for the wall of text blogpost, I just wanted to get this off my chest and it seemed like the appropriate place to do so.

No. 437874

>>437414
You can start any day you want

Psychological warfare is just as good if not more effective than physical. I really don't understand why people get so fixated on the fact women aren't as strong as men. It really doesn't matter with weapons, self defense, psychology. Learn how to embrace cold calculated cruel indifference towards your enemies and you will go far in life.

No. 437876

>>437407
I wouldn't say it's just physical advantages

No. 437877

>>437874
>It really doesn't matter with weapons, self defense, psychology
No offense but do you really believe that? I don't understand why women always have to get into mental gymnastics to deny the reality

No. 437879

>>421800
>i wish my lesbian friends weren't so accomplished and offline
I mostly relate except for this. It's the other way around for me, I can't get along with a lot of lesbians because they're too logged on and fixated on insular shit when I want to go on with my life. Which I can't fully blame them for, I'm the only lesbian I know IRL so if you're main community is online you're going to get wrapped in stupid stuff. But I just want to be normal and have a social life IRL instead of obsessing over politics and fandoms. I don't have male friends anymore because the nerdy ones inevitably troon and/or sexually harass me (I tolerate gay moids but I envy how they get to have their own bars and my mother loves gay men but barely supports me), but my OSA female friends (even the "radfem" "misandrist" ones) always inevitably dump me when they have a boyfriend, most women I meet IRL are married with kids and don't want to do anything fun or have hobbies. There's no winning. I wish I was one of those schizoid types who enjoy being alone.

No. 437881

I think I'm too autistic to understand female socialization. I like to talk about things that interest me but I can also make the effort to have conversation about things I don't really care about, and I'm curious about people's personal life, I feel like I'm puting effort in and being normal and prosocial but I just can't create any female friendship. The only thing I don't do is self depreciation and scrote worship, I also don't participate in the whole "I'm dumb because I'm a woman" charade. Last thing, I have a well behaved nigel who handles most of the chores and the cooking and is really sweet to me in public and I feel this create an enormous gap between me and other women since most conversation I find myself in end up being about their terrible useless husbands and I just don't know how to contribute since I can't just tell them to just break up with their scrote…

No. 437883

>>437881
>I can't just tell them to just break up with their scrote
Kek you should, they'll probably be shocked but hopefully that'll sow the seeds of doubt in them.

No. 437884

>>437881
I could've written your post. Some things just make me wince and my more 'feminine' friends (idk how to word it) notice it, so i hope i don't come across as judgmental, but i just can't stand seeing it. Acting like a dumb giggling girl around men, pretending to be dumber than they are around men, self-depreciating 'ironically' in really misogynistic ways (like 'he-he i'm just a silly stupid woman! that's what men say! Get it').
>venting about their love life
Yeah. Like you know they would never end the relationship that makes them suffer or even speak up, you're there to help them privately relieve their overwhelming pain. I don't know how to explain because i'm retarded but sometimes people vent to sort their thoughts and to find support and sometimes it's a way to have someone be a witness to their suffering because they enjoy being the virtuous, weak, sad woman. I'm fine with the first, the second type makes me really uneasy and i don't know how to convey my point without severely offending these women kek

No. 437891

>>437874
Women are taught and socialized to have a victim mentality around men, so it's no wonder. I don't blame them for that if they keep it to themselves, but it's annoying when they constantly have to bring other women down as well. It almost comes off as if they're worshipping men and denigrating women.
>>437877
Worrying about men being stronger and harming you is like worrying someone can walk up to you and shoot you in the face one day, or that you can get into a fatal car crash at any time. And even if you were a man, there are always going to be men who are stronger than you. It literally doesn't matter. Of course, be cautious when you can, don't go walking around at bad neighborhoods at 3 am, but the victim mentality regarding physical strength is so fucking overblown.

No. 437892

>>437891
Idk nona men being stronger is just a fact that shapes our day-to-day life. Men act the way they do because they know they can easily overpower women (even relatively strong ones). Acknowledging it doesn't mean you have to obsess over it though, anons who are hung up over this fact should try training and arming themselves if they can, it's better than moping about it online
>don't go walking around at bad neighborhoods at 3 am
Kek

No. 437900

>>437852
I relate to what you wrote a lot nona, from the 4ch past to the (fake) male friends and the fact it feels very hard to feel like you belong even between other "weird" women (like here on lc a lot of the time), I would befriend you
Back to the thread topic, I recently stumbled upon some woman's neocities site, she's from my same country and it made me feel very excited initially, her tastes seemed to be a bit on the weirder side and she seemed to lead a pretty lonely life… I felt like reaching out but then saw she still works and goes to school, mentions having friends repetedly through her posts etc, which is ofc a good thing and I'm happy for her, but I can't say I didn't feel a bit disappointed as she gave me a different impression initially. I feel inadequate/too afraid to ever message now, lmao

No. 437903

>>436407
you're not alone, I'm the same way and try not to have an online presence. I wish more people were considerate that not everyone wants to have their pictures posted everywhere, then look at you weirdly for it. have you tried talking to your school? Maybe you can find a way around it

No. 437904

>>436824
There were definitely some boys like that at my school, luckily I was never one of their targets but I believe you and the other anon. The sociopathic rare smart moid is absolutely capable of that and I"m sorry that happened to you.

No. 437908

I don't have any problem socializing but creating deeper meaningful friendships has been a struggle for me the older I get. I probably don't get out enough and I honeslty don't know how to make friends as an adult since I'm not in school or church. My coworkers are fine but theyre all men or normie OSA women and while we get along, I just can't see myself forming more meaningful connections with them. I don't do sports, I don't have kids, I don't drink, I don't have too many hobbies, I spent too much of my life making all my friends through the internet or anime conventions and now I'm too old to be doing that… how the fuck am I supposed to do it. Living in a smaller town in the middle of nowhere doesn't help either, considering my gf and I just moved here I really am so isolated except for her. I had friends back home that were genuinely some of the greatest people, but they were weirdos I met through work. The culture here is just so different I don't know how to put myself out there for friendship. Has anyone else ever figured this shit out?

No. 437909

>>437900
Why do you feel disappointed just because she mentioned having friends? People can still have "friends" and be lonely. You don't even know how often she spends time with them or what these friendships look like or If they consider her the same. I think you need to think about your own feelings of jealousy and insecurity towards other women.

No. 437916

>>436570
I’m too lazy to quote properly right now but what’s up with that? I’ve always had more success with making male friends because of my hobbies and interests and I’ve heard that thing about ‘You’re one of the guys because you’re autistic’. From like seven different people in these circles, one was a very very unfulfilling relationship but thats a different story.
Why do they do this?

No. 437939

Most of my life I’ve never had trouble befriending women, but now, nearing my 30s, I don’t have the patience to pretend along when they want to talk about men and attraction to them. It’s fine with my close friends, they’d never come to me to thirst on men or something, it’s always deeper than that, but building new friendships has been difficult, specially with those into hobbies that makes them a little obsessed with moids or your common normie women. It’s not like it bothers me or makes me angry at them, it’s just that such conversations are so empty and I don’t have the guts to say “this really doesn’t interest me” because I do like hearing about stuff out of my comfort zone. I just can’t explain if its a complex I need to get over and I don’t know how to approach it.
Texting is fine, I can ignore it, be a little snarky; however, in person, I’m torn between adopting the same persona I’ve always had or establishing some kind of boundary about it. It’s not like I also talk about my sexuality with ssa women, but in the end, it always ends up in me feeling like I need to go through these endless male-dominated subjects to actually connect with them.

No. 437940

even ITT i feel like i can't relate to anyone because i haven't had friends of either sex since i was 10, not even casual acquaintances and never been in a relationship

No. 437947

I feel like all my friendships with women end up just being shallow and we're basically just acquaintances at best, I've never had a true female friend and it hurts because I want a reliable friend group instead of just having acquaintances but the women around me are usually normies and too socially well adjusted so we never really hit it off on a deeper level. When I befriend men it's the same except we are more likely to have similar interests and they are usually more likely to be autistic and malajusted like me. Problem is they suck and will try to fuck me so they're still just acquaintances or just disappear from my life eventually so I still end up having no reliable friends long term.

Then I go on this website so I can talk to other weird women but even here I am not weird in the correct way and people are just callous and mean a lot since they're anonymous. So it just sucks overall and I'm lost when it comes to finding connections with other women at this point. Don't fit in with the normie men, the nerdy men, the nerdy women, or the normie women

No. 437950

>>437947
>Problem is they suck and will try to fuck me
Yea whatever you do if you’re looking for true friendship, pls never try it with a man. Especially if you get any signs he’s a creep early on, even small signs. One became infatuated with me and became a stalker and it ended up causing issue in my next relationship because he found out who he was and started harassing him. Thankfully enough time has passed and he has eased up but that shit was not worth it in any sense

No. 437957

>>437950
>stalker
Damn, that's scary, glad things are better now. I've pretty much given up on finding true friendship with men at this point yeah. I used to believe they cared about me and share personal details and try to form connection, but every time it just led to the same scenarios of them either confessing, commenting on my height and trying to infantilize me as a weird "flirty" thing, expecting me to laugh at all their gross misogynistic jokes and acting like I'm overly sensitive if I don't, ghosting me for no reason…It's just tiring and ended up feeling like I'm just putting in the effort to talk for absolutely no benefit to myself.

Another thing I hate about the NEET men too is how even when you're also a NEET yourself and "friends" with them, they'll constantly put down your experience and act like they have it worse than you automatically just because you're a woman, I can't count the amount of times moid "friends" I had did this shit and acted like I live life on easy mode because I can get random ugly dudes to fuck me or whatever if I wanted to, as if that solves anything. It feels so demeaning and like they'll never understand what actual loneliness is, I wished I was a moid sometimes since at least it seems like it'd be easier to find other fellow retarded ugly moids and form communities while with women most are less retarded so if you're a weird ugly woman you're kinda fucked. At least that's been my experience, men complain they can't find connections but then have tons of similar copypasted moid friends who regurgitate all their opinions, meanwhile I struggle to find even one woman that's remotely similar to me outside of threads like this

No. 437960

>>437940
How old are you now? Where you homeschooled or something?

No. 437968

>>437940
>>437960
i haven't had any as well since entering my teens. except like casual online communities and acquaintances? but not the kind you go out and do stuff with, just classmates i talked to when they felt like it.

personally i guess i didn't really want friends. i kind of hate people. plus the effort and vulnerability involved in becoming close to someone doesn't seem worth it, like the stress of somebody getting to know me and the potential heartbreaks outweigh the positives. so i didn't mind when people started seeing me as the quiet boring chick because they stopped bothering me.

No. 437969

>>436824
God same. I wasn't even pretty, maybe I just looked retarded and depressed and they knew I was an easy target. My life with the girls in my school was turbulent and had some drama, but a few guys made my young to late teenage years rough as fuck. Besides pushing me and throwing things at me. They ridiculed me in front of others, even teachers would laugh at their jokes. They hacked my social media account when I was 14, posted that I liked dicks, and spammed porn pictures across my profile. This one guy got overly obsessed with tormenting me and continued stalking me well into my 20s. He even showed up unannounced at my house a few times, and only stopped when I threatened to call the police on him. My female friends adored him. I was constantly having to interact with him because he inserted himself into every friend group I had. I still don't understand what they saw in him, he was ugly and dumb. He looked like a reject Beatles on crack. I kept saying to my friends that I hated him and they somehow didn't understand why, they brushed off what he did as jokes. This certainly taught me to filter out women in my life who actually listened to me, rather than the ones who tag along and expect you to do what they want. Not that I found a lot of women to bond with, but as much as I got hurt by women in my life, in comparison to that, things seemed tame with them.

No. 437973

>>437960
28, i went to a public school. i think i'm just cursed with no skills whatsoever since i barely talked to the point where some people unironically believed i was mentally disabled. there's times where i tried but the other kids would ghost me after 5 minutes even when we're in the same class.

No. 437981

>>437852
>I could say I was a genocidal white supremacist child molestor who was going to shoot up an elementary school for sexual kicks to a man and he could be fine with it but if I say a word wrong to most women they will crucify me - or rather just disgustedly stop talking to me
I think this is a large reason I have an easier time talking to men than women, it feels like disagreeing is a bigger taboo among women. It doesn't even have to be anything extreme or controversial (although I have my fair share of unpopular opinions), even minor and trivial disagreements seem to carry more social weight with women. I've heard it be said that male social dynamics have more of a competitive aspect (not necessarily in a combative way, but like including banter and lighthearted jabs) whereas women's social dynamics have a much greater emphasis on harmony and relatability, which I feel like is often accurate.
I also feel pretty bad when I make a woman uncomfortable whereas if a man isn't on the same page as me it's easy to dismiss it and move on.

I relate to the sisterhood stuff too. Truthfully there are a few men that I have had genuinely fulfilling friendships with (although I do think most are horrible) but I never stop wanting the girl bestie kind of friendship that media from my childhood set me up to wish for. I feel like a lot of it is literally just because I have an ingrained belief that I "should" have close female friends because I am female…

No. 438005

>>437969
>My female friends adored him.
Learning to cut off women who enable male degeneracy has been the hardest lesson for me to learn. It really hurts but they will never be worth it.

No. 438009

I don’t really get this thread because it’s not that difficult to find women that aren’t female-socialised, if not irl then definitely online? Is this an age thing? Is it more common for younger zoomers to just be autistic? Especially since the men I know are definitely much more normie. I would never put up with normie heterosexual woman degeneracy nor would I hang out with moids for being more accepting, they don’t know how to be anything other than superficial hang-out buddies anyway. Like >>436570, needing both sexes to entirely fulfil your social desires when it’s easier to just find one or two people who cover it all.
>>437874
I agree with this as well, and the fact that the people saying this are people that don’t have much of a life irl anyway makes sense to me. It’s much more overblown than reality. And I definitely agree with the anon that said women’s biggest weakness is having a victim mentality.

No. 438029

>>437960
Nta, but i haven't had friends since i was 12 either, nor any acquaintances. I do have autism tbh, but i only learned when i was in my mid-20s and i am now mortified to know that my sperg behaviour is why nobody liked me. I also went to am all girls school and pretty much only interact with women even in my adult life. When i interact with female family members i have zero in common with them because i am the only person who has my specific life experiences and i struggle to relate with anyone because of my perspectives on life. It usually ends in them trying to get away from me or preach to me about being more open, little do they know that me being open with people would be sperging about random x-men trivia. That's literally what i'd do as a child with nobody telling me to stop or that i was crazy, they just quietly distance themselves from me and ignore me.

No. 438041

I'm kinda desperate for some female friends but it feels impossible to meet people when you're over 25 and in a new state and have niche interests. I have a few female coworkers but I just always know they already have friends and I'm just a coworker so I shouldn't get my hopes up. Nobody wants to invite you to anything when you don't know any references and your voice is so high pitched people think you're faking it.

>>437076
I got a new job and my lead and her friend both had switches so I asked if they played Monster Hunter Rise and one deadass asked me "what do you do in that game?" It was so hard to not plainly say "hunt monsters". At least they played Zelda.

No. 438094

>>438009
>online
I'm not interested in online friendships, I prefer IRL outings to hang out with people and I just don't like texting and chatting.

No. 438098

>>438009
>the fact that the people saying this are people that don’t have much of a life irl anyway makes sense to me
What makes you think that? Because this isn't true at all. Typical "you must be neet" copium

No. 438127

>>438005
Yes, that shit hurts. I ended up distancing myself and I just have one sigle friend left from that time in my life, but I kept them around for so long before I realized it wasn't worth it.

No. 438132

>>438094
What I mean is finding friends online eventually brings you up with one who lives at least somewhere nearby, most of my irl friends are actually the a couple of ones I made online and the friends they’ve introduced me to, since they’re the ones that stick. Still even beyond that online friendships can be pretty fulfilling anyway, to those who do like chatting online or gaming.

No. 438164

I so badly want other women as friends! I get super anxious and nervous about looking stupid in front of them I blank out.
I wish I had girlfriends to tell me what looks good and what doesn’t, or to keep me in the loop about stuff. I’ve always been like this, I hate being so lonely and not having enough self esteem to get the courage to say something to people. I’m like a ghost. I’m seen and not heard. I wish I could be like the girls online, with their beautiful hair, and they dress so nice. I don’t have women in my life to tell me what looks good and what doesn’t.

No. 438170

N(retard)

No. 438297

>>437063
I thought the pink wood looked nice.

No. 438306

>>438164
Why do you need other people to tell you what looks good? Don't you have a personal opinion on fashion?

No. 438340

>>438306
It's just like bonding i guess.

No. 438384

Something I've been curious about: show of hands, is anyone else here either
1. on, or suspect that you might be, on the spectrum and/or
2. bisexual?
On the rare occasion that I've made friends with women IRL that I feel really "get me" it almost always randomly turns out that they're bisexual (like me) or on the spectrum (never been diagnosed but I think I might be)

No. 438428

I had a post typed up, but it was way too long, and I doubt anyone wants to read all of that, but this is the gist of things. It’s as if there’s something intrinsically wrong with me. Every friendship I’ve had has been surface-level. I was always the backup friend or the friend who introduced two girls, and they became close friends and shut me out. I’ve been an agoraphobic neet for some years now, and I'm planning to go to college, and I’m so anxious about friends, especially since I’ll be a couple years older than the typical freshmen. I was never able to make friends online. I always say things that get misinterpreted and upset people. Or get no responses at all. I don’t even fit in here. I just don’t know where else to go.

No. 438432

>>438428
are you autistic?

No. 438446

>>438428
nonny i was in the same situation and sure, it'll be hard but probably not as horrible as you imagine, i bet there'll be a few slightly older students too. not everyone figures their life out at 18. when i was doing a foundation course we had a literal old lady there and we all loved her.

if you're curious how i'm doing: i still fucking hate going outside and being around people so no, i've not found any college besties, and yes, i resent scrolling through the retarded zoomer groupchat for info about assignments. personally i'm not trying to make any friends but i still had fun when i got assigned a group project with some other older students. just do the work and be civil anon, you'll be fine.

No. 438491

>>437903
For my volunteering and internships you basically sign a form allowing them to take pictures of you that they have ownership over. If you don't allow it then you're out of luck and don't get the opportunity sadly… I haven't been posted anywhere that I know of for these activities, hopefully it's being of my non photogenic nature

No. 438663

>>438384
yup, autistic bisexual here. i don't relate to most bisexual women as theyre often trans-supporting and very liberal in a handmaiden-y way, or like 99% guys and 1% of women. i did meet an autistic bisexual once and she was amazing though, we had the exact same taste and energy!

No. 438671

For me one thing that really alienates me from others is whenever or not someone received the "princess treatment" all their lives. I'm talking about people like Jillian who were spoiled, sheltered, treated like the most special person in the world, defended to death from any criticism, and never had any consequences for their actions or a moment of self reflection. This is not exclusive of women, a whole lot of men are like this too, maybe way more than women actually. Worst case scenario they become super narcissistic, judgemental, and quick to anger, but there's plenty of cases in which it's obvious that particular person wants to be the center of attention and affection, so anything you do has to be in service of them, since they have main character syndrome. You see it a lot on social media.

I'm also alienated from anyone who uses woke language when defending themselves, I know this is a dime a dozen online and of course it occurs both sexes but the only time I've encountered it irl was from another woman, which weirded me out because I'm used to spaces like lolcow where most women are of course not like that. She was quick to anger and defended woke things on her facebook, I disagreed with her once on something, she got mad, and when I tried to apologize and explain myself to her she said I was gaslighting her, and I was not. It still makes me upset to this day because I really liked her as a friend, we had things in common not related to wokeism and it's hard to make good long lasting friendships after a certain age. I wonder if I should contact her and try to apologize again, I don't know nonnies.

No. 438683

>>438428
wow, I literally could have written this, I feel the same way. The best way I've been able to cope with this is to focus more on other things rather than relationships with other people, like hobbies or career. Kinda doomer-y but if there's something really innately wrong with you there's not much else to do. Hoping all goes well nonny

No. 438713

>>438384
Why you bisexuals always have to bring that you're bisexual into conversations somehow

No. 438717

>>438671
I've moved away from using "woke" since far righters co-opted it to mean anything vaguely liberal, but it really is a mindset I find unfortunately common among women. I've felt more on edge about mentioning anything vaguely political around women aged 18-40 5x more than men, since in my experience they enforce and have bigger social consequences for it. Or they ruin friendships with that therapyspeak about friendship 101 being "emotional labor" or whatever.

>>438713
Who cares?

No. 438733

>>438717
No suprise you don't relate to other women narc whore(infighting)

No. 438738

>>438428
Whoa, this resonates with me so much, I’m glad you shared anon. I wish we could all be friends

No. 438755

>>438663
This is gonna sound odd but I feel like a large amount of other bisexual women I have met irl are only into really done-up hyperfeminine women and are strangely performative about it. And then they go "zomg you're bi too do you think she's hot?" and show you some OF-type of girl. Or some genshin anime waifu god forbid kek. But then they get all squicked out over body hair and think it's super weird if you think a butch or otherwise unconventional woman is attractive. And don't get me started at the women who say they're bi but their taste is whatever photoshopped women their Nigel likes to ogle. I've met bisexual women who aren't like this of course and tend to resonate with them better but I'm noticing a weird pattern with this kind.

No. 438777

File: 1729381281547.png (642.76 KB, 1022x731, my average experience.png)

I just hate this social anxiety who fucks with my brain every time.
Cant do irl friendships because some scrote falls with me even doing the low effort or trying so hard to make female friends just to get screwed up or completely ignored when they are done with me.
I have an history behind me with bullying in a girls-only high school and having a shitty family. Doing therapy with meds, but still feel like a fucking alien.
Why is so hard to socialize now? In my case, is always about making "weird faces" or "talking too much" when I have to interact with other girls. "Well, I cant have a mirror in my pocket everytime to check my expressions, and sorry if I talked too much about X, I was really happy" and even with that, they just stick to leave me behind the conversation.
Maybe is my loneliness who makes me more retarded than already am (plus having fucking anime and movies to teach me about frens and rabu), but would like knowing other worlds and sharing my experiences and ideas. I hate being fake but often I think that cant go full mode with being myself, I feel judged every single second.

No. 438788

>>438432
I’ve considered it. If I’m autistic I’m not sure where to go from here. Autism has become a trendy diagnosis, so if I bring it up I’m sure the doctor will think I’m a tiktard. I’ve checked out autistic spaces online, and though I relate to some aspects, I don’t think I’d fit in there either. Fml.
>>438446
Thanks! I’m glad your college experience is going well despite having no besties.
>>438683
Yeah, it just sucks. I’d much rather have friends or at least a girlfriend than dive deep into my hobbies or career. You're right though, if something is innately wrong, I can’t fix it, so there's no point in dwelling on what I can’t get. I hope so too.
>>438738
I’m nice to know I’m not alone in how I feel. I wish that too.

No. 438789

Anyone else have such a bad friend experience when they were young it still bothers you to this day?

I still think about when I was in high school a friend of mine asked if I wanted to go over her house to get ready for prom and we went dress shopping together. However the day of she texts me last minute there is a family emergency and to go ahead without her. I didn't think anything of it until later that night I saw on fb she was tagged in a bunch of photos with a big group of other girls with captions about them getting ready/hanging out before prom. So I assume somebody invited her to their group and instead of inviting me along too she decided to just ditch me and lie. What's funny is after that she continued to try and be my friend and seemed confused when I blew her off.

Sorry for blogging, I guess I'm still jaded over stupid high school bs because I experienced a situation like this again as a grown woman recently. Am I just too socially retarded to understand the rationale of being so inconsiderate?

No. 438810

How do I find women who are fellow weirdos (husbando posters, drama-obsessed autists, unconventionally attractive, like anime/manga/manhua that never gets translated, has some girly hobbies like skincare that they hyperfixate on)

I am surrounded by normies. Which I don't mind. I can yap with my female co-workers about nothing all day but it's ultimately empty & unfulfilling talk

The co-workers who are into anime/manga are into mainstream shit I don't watch or are K-Pop fans. I also feel intimidated approaching them, especially the women, to discuss anything because they're so much more beautiful and intelligent than me. Haha

I had one friend in uni who I kind of bonded with but the friendship fizzled out quickly as she has an actual life, unlike me

How do I find you bitches in real life, I'll make the first move. Please accept me

No. 438853

>>438733
Stop being so easily triggered, wtf about that post was "narc"

No. 438857

>>438788
It's true that it's trendy, but if you're obviously autistic and clearly have a history, as well as have family or someone else whose known you a long time back it up you shouldn't have a problem. But if you don't want or see a point in a diagnosis that's okay too. A diagnosis test will be extensive and you may learn other things about yourself. Embrace autism is a good resource, they have some tests here. https://embrace-autism.com/autism-tests/

I also don't relate to many autists, I'm not that kind of autistic I guess! I rarely make online friends unlike other autistic people it seems. The "autistic community" isn't fully representative women like us, it's a minority of autistic people.

No. 439556

File: 1729629288362.png (1.51 MB, 1280x914, 1714688115934.png)

I wish I was a normie so bad. Unlike most nonnas itt I'm not an autist and I'm actually quite extroverted irl and it's hard for me to pin what exactly I'm doing wrong… I've never had a best friend, not even as a child and I was a very open and friendly kid. I would always approach other children to play together. It's like the subconsciously knew there was something off even then.
I know some anons might say I'm complaining for nothing but I hate the fact that no matter how well I get along with another woman I'm just never friendship material to her. I'm like that one acquaintance everyone says is cool and talks to from time to time but is never allowed to actually move to the next level of the relationship. They will talk to me once a year or if they happen to pass me on the street. And I tried different ways to approach it, I tried being a trendy normie, I tried to get along with nerdy girls, I tried it with artsy pretentious women. I know a little bit of everything so I can always find something to talk about. The only thing I stay quiet on is make up because I don't wear it and I'm opposed to it, just don't voice this opinion to anyone. I refuse to believe this all goes down to me not being feminine enough but I can't help but think have I been born male I would be normal, maybe even popular. Even as a child I felt like I was doing something wrong. Sure, I played with dolls and princess dresses but my personality was often deemed too boyish by adults in my life. I remembered being punished for playing around with boys in the dirt as a child and being called a tomboy for it like it was a slur.
I don't even think that I'm masculine at all. I even enjoy a few stereotypical things like talking about what attractive scrotes but having any sort of standards as a woman brands you a psychopath so I never do. I genuinely don't get what I'm doing wrong, it makes me want to cry how lonely I feel.

No. 439560

>>439556
Ime friendships are just like any relationship. You can't really force a romantic relationship with a person that doesn't click with you, the same goes for best friends and all that. People also change all the time, so it's hard to find someone long-term who will be in sync with you. There's a lot of luck involved in meeting people, plus people have to be flexible and realistic about what to expect from different relationships. Not every friendship is the same.

No. 439565

>>439560
I guess it's true but that makes it feel hopeless. I don't want to spend my life alone…

No. 439575

>>439556
based haibane renmei enjoyer, i hope you make friends one day.

No. 439604

I spent too much time on 4chan as a young girl and it ruined my mind. I spent too much time shitting on women because that’s all I saw. And I HATE it, I hate myself for it. It was the worst place to spend as a child. I undid all that shit when I found this place thankfully.

It did however make me understand men and what they’re really like. I unfortunately have a brand of autism where I make male friends much more easily and sadly crave their validation so still have pick me behaviors. Idk how to get rid of that. The only female friends I have are ones that are “brutal” idk how to describe it. I’m also very very dramatic and emotional, swear a lot, feel everything horribly intensely so I always feels I’m holding back unless I’m talking to other women like that or… men. Because only they let me chat like that. I understand it’s problematic I’m just venting.

Maybe someone can relate?

No. 439609

>>439604
You were a child. You don't have to hate yourself for it, you're allowed to forgive yourself. I imagine most girls go through a women hating phase, or a "I'm not like other girls" phase before we realise how silly and stupid it is. I know I definitely thought I was so different when I was younger (not better mind you, just different, as I've always struggled to fit in and even to this day I have more close male friends) and now I'm older I realise I'm just like all the other girls because all girls are unique in their own way. I'm convinced that as we're raised we're told that so many of our traits are faults and weaknesses so it's no wonder we would want to distance ourselves from that.
I don't think getting on better with men immediately makes it a pick me behaviour. As long as you don't put down other women and don't think you're inherently better than them, there's no issue. It's only problematic if you actively avoid being friends with other women because they are women, but you yourself mentioned you do have female friends you can be yourself around. So just relax.

No. 439634

>>439604
there are a lot of women on here who used 4chan as kids. i'll never forget being being a child scrolling through threads like 'too young for those tits' where moids posted pictures of developed little girls and crying with jealousy because i was flat chested.

No. 439710

>>439609
>woman hating phase
It's not a phase mom

No. 439814

File: 1729703292429.jpg (117.12 KB, 736x919, cd319945ffd25048fd4c98f96d198a…)

I recently started putting more effort into my appearance, in the hopes of looking less sloppy, but I feel like every piece of advice I find is for girly girls. The women explaining hair care and fashion on youtube are so annoying, braindead, and superficial (the worst part is when they make poses for the camera with a self-satisfied smirk) but there just doesn't seem to be anything else.
I've tried to look into dark academia cause it seems at least a bit more fitting, but even there… how the hell do I do any of these looks without make up, jewelry, skirts etc…? I feel like there's no way for me to look put together without dressing at least a bit more feminine. No one expects make up from a guy but they do with women. So I'll always look sloppy next to women that wear it. A guy only needs to wear dress pants and a shirt but if I do that I'll look like I put in no effort. I wish there was some normal, masculine but well-dressed woman who could explain this to me.

How do you guys deal with this?

No. 439818

>>439814
Women don't look sloppy without makeup in my opinion. Only some people feel that way. Being clean, tidy, and hygienic is like 70% of looking fashionable. I have a handful of low-effort outfits that are good on my body shape and suit my complexion and everyone mentions how put-together I look. Granted, I wear concealer and mascara, but it takes ten minutes for me to get ready in the morning, including getting ddressed. I guess what I'm trying to say is, focus less on a specific aesthetic, and focus more on getting what suits your skin and hair colors and body shape. You'll be able to achieve what you want more easily in that way.

No. 439834

>>439818
Do you accessorize?

Also, is there any type of clothing in particular you would recommend? I've been wearing jeans and t-shirts until now. Dress pants? Blouses? Or is that overkill?

No. 439839

>>439834
>accessories?
Sometimes. I usually always wear a bracelet or ring, but nothing crazy. When I go out to the mall or on a date, I'll wear earrings and maybe a necklace. Depends. Do belts count as accessories? I wear perfume as well.
Jeans and t-shirts could be fashionable if you get jeans that fit you really perfectly, especially if they're an unusual color. Do you know your color season or have an idea of what colors look good on you? Dark brown or mustard color jeans like your picrel could look nice while not being too much. T-shirts can be cute if they have a fun or interesting graphic on them. Plus you can layer with a jacket or long sleeved shirt under, or a necklace on top. Dress pants and blouses aren't too formal imo, but if you want to get into wearing suits, that's what I'd call too much.

No. 439846

>>439814
i'm like 99% certain that i dress shittier than you so don't listen to me, but i do it with intention tbh.

1. watch content targeted both towards women and men to keep in mind the insane amount of effort required from women 2. find a couple of creators whose style you find inspiring. you don't need a lot (because you won't find a lot) 3. try stuff on, understand your body, shape and preferences, it's a long process 4. confidence.

No. 439847

>>439818
>Being clean, tidy, and hygienic is like 70% of looking fashionable
Bullshit. I can do my makeup and dress up perfectly and I'll still look like a meth head

No. 439848

File: 1729705616813.jpg (3.35 MB, 2880x2880, butch.jpg)

>>439814
I'm not sure if you're a lesbian, but typing "casual butch style" into Google yielded these. Maybe this could help, they look causal but also very clean and put-together. and hot

No. 439849

>>439847
Is your skin bad? Do you have an unflattering haircut? Do the clothes you wear suit you? Makeup is really not necessary or even ideal. Heavy makeup on someone who clearly doesn't take care of themselves (such as greasy hair and dirty, cheap-looking clothes) makes them look worse, honestly.

No. 439905

>>439839
Yeah, I have read up on the color stuff. I'm into painting, so color coordination is fortunately not that hard for me. I'm a soft summer and I decided to wear desaturated blue, cream, brown and sage green for the most part.
Thanks for the tip on the colored jeans, that sounds interesting. I only have one pair that isn't blue or black right now but I'll experiment a bit more in that direction.
I'm worried I'll look too much like a teenager if I wear graphic tees. People already tell me that I look like a teen often, it was one of the trigger for me deciding to get better at fashion

No. 439909

>>439846
I feel like the type of woman that dresses like I hope to would never become a fashion creator. Have you ever found any masculine women fashion creators (that aren't gendertards)?

No. 439914

>>439849
Yeah. A full face of makeup looks greasy and unhygienic, foundation in particular is terrible, it's never flattering. Heavy eye makeup at most, clothes that fit well and hair/teeth care go a long way. Or you can not bother with makeup at all, it's actually more likely to make you look sick than just having a bare face with a basic skincare routine like washing it and moisturizing it regularly. I have extreme discoloration in the face and when i didn't know how to properly conceal it, i got more concerned looks and 'would you like a glass of water' by strangers than when i don't bother kek

No. 439921

>>439848
To be honest, I'm not a huge fan of this style. I like some aspects of it but it also looks like some of the clothes are from the men's section and they don't fit right. I used to wear men's clothes myself for a while but then I realized that they're not cut for my kind of body. It looks unflattering imo, especially when you don't have an androgynous frame. I'd like something that still shows that I have hips, soft shoulders etc. without being overtly "girly"

No. 439923

>>439849
What I'm trying to say is if you don't have the looks you don't have it; there's no clothing, makeup, skincare etc. exist to change your look drastically

No. 439924

>>439909
i feel the same way which is why i almost exclusively watch movies, random hiking vlogs (like camper vibe) and hobbyist autorepair videos for "fashion" inspo. you prolly aren't as extreme, so maybe you'd enjoy creators like lefie or jade fox? i really recommend trying tv shows or casual vloggers for normie & naturalistic yet good looking fits!

No. 439925

>>439924
Thank you

No. 439932

here's this
in this current climate of bs feminism, women are expected to either be victims or girlbosses who managed to rise above
I'm clearly neither
in the sense that I don't feel the need to be victimized in usual sense nor does my existence feel successful in any way
my perception of womanhood is kind of tainted this way
on one hand, I realize women have to deal with way more bs that men do, and I doubt I need to expand and that part
in turn, that makes the expectation of a woman to fold into those last two archetypes
on the other hand, I'll put it plainly, I feel privileged
I was born an entitled brat and I'll likely die one, considering the state of my life hasn't evolved much since teenagehood
in that sense, I feel much closer to the whims of pretentious moids who feel like they're owed the world rather than had to deal with the plight of pseudo victimhood ingrained into their personality to the point they stop whining about it
and I say this as much as I find this kind of incelish behavior despicable, I hate myself in the same way
I feel like every time I see a woman I expect them to be much more mature than I am in that sense, but then again that might be biased by my severely biased terminally online kind of socialization
I guess it makes me feel inadequate but I still realize this just stems from frustration with my rather depressive and shallow mean of subsistence rather than any sort of jealousy
I doubt I'm making my message come across anyway, and I don't even know if this is right thread for this, but I had to spell it out
I don't think I'll ever have a woman as a friend
or any at all
thankfully for them

No. 439934

>>439932
This is the most autistic post I have read today

No. 439938

>>439934
I can't even tell what you mean at this point
but thanks anyway

No. 440079

>>439932
anon please stop navelgazing and touch some grass

No. 440246

>>440079
well then, sorry for assuming that was the point of this thread
pretty much demonstrates how, I'm fairly convinced only 4chan-adjacent, neet-types are ever going to relate to this
turns out, you can't be both a loser and a woman
manchild might be asked to man up, but that's only because they're expected to be left behind
but as it stands, there's no "moral equivalency", as they like to say

No. 440265

>>439932
>>440246
Are you saying you’re a womanchild? There’re plenty of women like that who aren’t channers thank God.

No. 440267

notice how when there's social pseudo-outrage about bs hit-pieces articles about "dropping out of society" it's _always_ about men?
and for the rest of us? at best you'll get gargabe-tier advice telling to either victimize or just "bee" ourselves

No. 440284

>>440267
>either victimize or just "bee" ourselves
I’m genuinely trying to understand you btw, what do you mean by this and how would it work in response to dropping it off society?

No. 440290

>>440284
We need an autistic translator

No. 440296

>>440265
online socialization is the last refuge for those who have willfully shunned themselves away from having to relate with their immediate social environment, so at least that's a prerequisite
ever heard of this quote?
"Distrust those cosmopolitans who search far in their books for duties that they neglect to fulfil towards those around them. Such philosophers love the Tartars to so as to be spared from loving their neighbours."
>>440284
sorry, I know I'm quite awkward at spelling this out, but what I'm trying to say is, I don't feel like I belong anywhere, not here, not on 4chan, I just seethe on my own, since I won't ever be allowed to get away with as much nonsense as men do
here's an irrelevant personal anecdote, when I was still in college, you'd often get student coming in late to the study sessions, and 100% of the time, it'd be men, and well aware of this, our lecturer would make a joke about it, insisting on us noticing that, as a woman, you're not expected to fail, you're expected to have been born a try-hard, for the simple reason you've been dealt with shit your whole life
well I haven't, I'm lazy, I dropped out, and now I might as well be invisible, since I won't even get acknowledged out of spite

No. 440332

say even here all I get is getting called barely concealed slurs, like "autistic"

No. 440334

>>440332
anon you take it too personal, most anons in this website are autistic

No. 440497

I resent my mom for not teaching me about personal hygeine and grooming. I was an outcast in high school because my hair was very frizzy, I did not wear deodorant, didn’t own a bra that fit properly.
Now I overcompensate by dressing well but the women who want to be my friend are too normie for me.

No. 440825

File: 1729951998897.jpg (23.53 KB, 293x300, cowboy be bop.jpg)

>>439556
I can relate to you nona. Sometimes you have to play like a masquerade to make acquaintances and friends, but I think is better to stay alone (even if you can barely hold on) rather than being "fake" at the eyes of those women who I think are inside of circlejerks. Think about that as a sort of russian roulette where when the bullet hits in 5/6 opportunities for bad, and like >>439560 said, is just luck at this point. Kudos to you, Reki fan, you sound like a good person.
>>439604
Being honest, I was aware of 4chan since I was little, but just lurked it time to time. English is my second language so I didnt have the feel to actually participate. Helped me to find out media I enjoy, but at the same time fucked up my brain. Like, sometimes I find out myself thinking/typing like one of those scrotes… very unsettling. Even when 4chan is treated like le obscure site full of hackers (and Reddit/Twitter being kinda the norm) I think the chan culture is still the same everywhere. Like other anons said, you arent alone in this. In my own experience, knowing that you have those thoughts and even behaviors, you can always change for the better. Its not easy, but is always the way to break free from the internet poisoning.

No. 440857

>>440497
I wanna know someone like the women on this website so bad. Yesterday I saw this girl at my university. Glasses, pony tail, zipped up hoodie. She was eating alone and practically scowling at everyone walking by. She just screamed angry autistic imageboard person, but it's not like I could just walk up to her and ask to be friends. I'll probably never see her again. And I might even meet someone more outwardly normie from here one day but it's a one in a million chance we'd get close enough to admit it to each other.

No. 440878

>>440334
By autistic, do you guys mean like, actual autism, or just being weird? Isn't autism supposed to be relatively rare?

No. 440881

>>440857
>She was eating alone and practically scowling at everyone walking by
You probably just saw me
>>440878
The latter

No. 440888

>>440878
I mean autistic in the way it's used on the internet. She looked severly socially incapable in a way that I find likeable. She seemed deeply uncomfortable to be surrounded by people but her response wasn't to look scared, instead it was to glare at them. This is me.

No. 440906

File: 1729973590772.mp4 (67.43 KB, 256x144, images.mp4)

>>440888
Let's marry

No. 440921

Romantic relationships and dating are completely alien to me, I can't fathom people having them as high priority while I just have more important shit to so.

No. 440973

>>422882
>>422732
NTA from any part of this discussion, this is incredibly late but I had some screed in my head about having trouble relating to women since I run into a lot that end up doing this (talking mad shit to the point nobody feels safe). I'm generally in that position where I hear a ton of shit-talking and assume I'm not immune to it if I piss off the wrong person too. Feels a bit vindicating to hear it since I always thought I was the asshole for leaving.

I wish I could say exactly those posts to some female friends I recently had to cut off in a way they would understand - the negativity is so draining. I'm willing to say it's just bad luck and mental issues/shit home life making me not really see red flags early enough, but it seems like so many women just enjoy sitting in groups and torching everyone they know. I understand feeling comfortable enough to gossip about things, but I do not understand talking trash on people, and then wasting their time by still inviting them to parties and acting like nothing was said.
I don't fucking get it. By the time I'm talking shit on someone, it's because I'm fine with never seeing them again and the bridge is burned for whatever reason. I hate hearing "don't take it personally" since in situations like what you're referring to, the shit-talk is entirely personal.

No. 440999

Anyone else is asexual or apathetic towards sex?

No. 441001

>>440999
Yeah, I reckon masturbating does the job well enough. Never even had sex but I am deeply uncomfortable with the idea of someone getting close enough to do that with me in the first place.

No. 441002

>>440999
Me too, I have a low libido in the first place so masturbating is enough for me as well, and to me the cons outweigh the pros when it comes to sex (don't want to be vulnerable,
don't want to risk pregnancy/STI, don't want to veto a bunch of people until I find the right one…), it helps that I don't want to settle down or have children. I don't get why so many anons get so pressed about some women not being interested in sex, they act weirdly superior and smug about fucking their nigels as if we would be jealous of that. Weirdly enough normie women are more accepting of that fact, I've let it slip to some of my coworkers that I was still a virgin at my age and it wasn't a big deal to them.

No. 441006

>>441002
>>441001
I don't masturbate or fantasize tho, it's hard for me to relate to rest of the world tbh. It's so hard to be like this

No. 441055

>>441006
Do you think this was inborn or some kind of trauma/mental issue?

No. 441129

>>441055
I don't know if it's inborn. Since I couldn't form a healthy sexual identity due to mistreatment and ostracization I got during my early childhood years. I only had feelings for a very few girls, but I don't count them because they weren't anything sexual. I thought I was lesbian because of this but I have no interest in sex or sexualizing women. I wanted to be in romantic relationships with women and romanticized this idea I guess, so it made me feel confused about my sexuality. Now I for sure know that's not what I'm seeking for. I'm sure I don't feel the way I do because of lack of experience.

No. 441790

>>440999
I’m pretty horny and enjoy sex but I hate/distrust men and am very insecure with women (I think I’m too ugly and weird for them, or that they’re going to prefer a moid for some reason).

No. 441794

I recently figured out my kibbe type, cut my hair short and thrifted a new wardrobe. Finally I'm sometimes being treated like a peer by other women, but it does give me whiplash every time. I'm so not used to it, that it doesn't immediately register that they're actually talking to me and not someone behind me or something kek. I'm not sure even whether I'm happy about it, because it feels so superficial. I'm still the same autist and I was already clean and tidy before, so I don't agree with >>439818 that it's 70% of looking fashionable. At least not for everyone. I would be happy to be make more friends, because I desperately need them, but it feels like a weird barrier of entry and shallow to have to look fashionable in order to make friends.

No. 441827

>>441794
are there no women around you who wear hoodies and sweats?

No. 441830

>>441827
Yes, but when I wear that kind of stuff, I look particularly slovenly. Most women here are N types, so they look good in casual low effort stuff, while I don't.

No. 441950

>>441794
This kinda thing makes me want to make more of an effort but a) I barely have the energy to eat most of the time and b) the whiplash would just weird me out and make me angry - I hate that women have to go the extra mile just to be acknowledged (especially uggos like me kek). That said it would be fun, and would probably mean I could get away with less masking

No. 441951

>>427046
SAME. This is my mother, except she does explode on a regular basis about how put-upon she is and how she does everything for everyone except for herself. Part of me feels really bad for her, because it's like she can't function any other way. But at the same time she does shit like actively choosing not to sit down, or eat, or rest, and then explodes in rage-crying that "she never got to sit/eat/rest, and NOBODY cares!!" It just feels like martyrdom at this point, she wants people to fawn and tell her to relax, just so that she can say "NooOoo, I can't! I don't have time!"

>>427035
>They always take their suffering as a point of pride and say it's a mark of womanhood, what a fucking cope. Of course since it's a mark of womanhood if you aren't serving as a doormat you're either "childish" or very "male-like".

THIS THIS SO MUCH THIS. I was constantly told by my parents that I was "more like a boy" instead of a girl, and that I'm selfish and "not naturally a nurturing person" because I don't immediately drop everything to serve others. If that makes me moidlike, then so be it, I guess. I'd rather be that than a weeping doormat.

No. 441994

>>427035
>and women/radfem also fall for that shit and take it as a point of pride being "empathetic" and "kinder" than moids
It's not even genuine empathy a lot of the time. It's compliance with masochism. I think some femininity is good and genuine empathy is part of that, but the whole 'look at me i'm so nice and i suffer so much, please acknowledge how good i am' thing pisses me off. Women who adhere too hard to this are full of resentment because it doesn't come from sincere concern for others, it's basically a self-made prison. It's fucking bleak and once you see it you can't unsee it. The other day i was listening to a woman angrily ranting about someone she knows because he went no-contact with his PoS alcoholic violent dad instead of being understanding and nice, i couldn't contain my irritation and told her i get the guy. It always comes down to either getting off (figuratively) to being the most pitiful woman or having so little boundaries they can't distance themselves from anyone, harming themselves and others in the process. I really don't see what's good, moral or empathetic about this. I'm not sure they're getting a lot out of being like this either, it's such a shitty tradeoff
>if you aren't a doormat you're 'childish'
Men get to be selfish adults in peace. Adulthood is responsibility, but somehow it has to come with masochism for it to count in women

No. 442039

>>441951
I’ve met so many varieties of this woman omg. They ultimately create their own misery and enable the laziness of their kids and husbands/man children so it’s on them, though I respect that they were probably brought up to think they should slave away to be a ‘real woman’ or some nonsense

No. 442239

>>427035
One thing that makes me feel like an unladylike weirdo is letting my self interest guide my decision making. For example I got a mortgage so I could have a place to myself not because I want to provide housing for future partner/kids. It took me a while to figure out why my coworkers assumed I was baby rabies mode when I told them I bought my first house.

No. 442422

I don't know if i fit into this thread, but i was raised around very critical and narcissistic women as well as abusive men who would physically hurt me and constantly make me feel less than human. so i never really felt like a person let alone felt safe in being a girl like any other girl despite my deep desire to be feminine and have fun like every other girl. life at home lead me to be a very strange kid who could not properly socialize with people. i had enough charm as a little kid to draw in a friend or two but i did not form emotional connections to them and i would drop them shortly after. this pattern of short lived friendships with other women continued where i felt nothing for her as a friend and it would emotionally drain me to be in their presence especially since they usually seemed normal and comfortable within themselves and i did not relate and i felt monstrous especially when i'd drop some weird ass rant and they look at you like you're schizophrenic KEK. I'm nearing my mid 20s now and i struggle with chronic loneliness despite knowing some female acquaintances here and there mostly from my last job, I can say that i think i accepted the fact that i am never going to relate to most women but that is okay and it's making my pain of when interacting with other women and having that pointed out more bearable and i take things less seriously and deep which allows me to not go bpd mode and cut people off to feel safe.

No. 442952

File: 1730837741804.png (513.65 KB, 785x533, 1640321650072.png)

What's a (seemingly) unintentionally insulting comment another woman has made about you?

For me, it was finding out I had been described as being very 'male brained' by my peers in an attempt to justify to others why I had a really bad habit of 'mansplaining' things to people.
I'm a lot more mindful as to not do it now, but basically I'd reiterate what someone else had said prior or I would info dump about a given topic unprompted to the request of no one. Up until that point, I had no clue that was even something I was doing, let alone that it bothered people, and I suspect the reason I never noticed was because I was almost entirely friends with men beforehand.
I didn't realize how badly that comment hurt me at the time until I brought up the experience to someone else and unexpectedly started crying halfway through describing it. I know their intentions were in the right place, but hearing those exact phrases made me feel like I wasn't 'female' enough for other women.

No. 442963

>>442952
Man, that really sucks especially since you weren't doing it on purpose.
I used to love when people would say that I have a calming/relaxing aura but now I hate hearing it especially from people that don't know me that well because that just means I'm a doormat that they see as easy to use and get upset when I match their energy.

No. 442984

>>442952
A woman actually said this to me almost verbatim as well and it stung. Another woman (a TIF actually) said I reminded her of a condescending man because I used "too many SAT words," and all this made me very insecure about talking at all. I felt like I must come across like a Redditor in a woman's body, and women must hate talking to me. But silver lining, maybe, I met a woman who told me she loves my infodumping and always asks me to tell her about my latest interests. Maybe the key is befriending other spergy woman.

No. 442986

>>442984
She sounds dumb anon, no woman could ever be as bad as a man when it comes to overexplaining stuff.

No. 442988

>>442952
Being constantly told I look like a deer in the headlights/frightened rabbit when I'm in a normal situation. If the women who say this stuff was a bit older and nice, I might feel comforted (and a bit faint kek) but it's been from women my own age who are more socially confident and conventionally successful than me. Makes me feel like a child and a victim and reminds me of the times people have hurt and taken advantage of me all the time, and then I start thinking I'm never going to stop attracting creeps and abusers. Fun!

No. 443012

>>442952
An autism faker told me i repeat myself too much. Kek

No. 443045

>>442984
>tif says you sound like a man because you use too many big words
Think about this for a few minutes kek. TIFs hate women and make it everyone's problem. It's not your fault.

No. 443075

>>442952
So Tiffany was basically implying all women are stupid? Sasuga tranny I guess…

No. 443086

>>442952
This was in high-school embarrassingly enough, but I was told that i was really boring and didn't talk enough. The thing is that i was so determined to be a social butterfly, be liked and tried so hard to interact with others only for people to ignore me. In general, i have always been somebodh that people ignore and dislike, but i broke down crying really hard after that comment because i felt like such a failure because i tried so hard to be somebody people would like.

No. 443088

I feel like having larger than average breasts have alienated me from other women my whole life, whether consciously through obvious backhanded jealousy or subconsciously through exclusion. It fucking sucks. It also doesn’t help that moids are even more piggish towards me because of my anatomy than other women.

Sometimes I wish I could just cut my tits off and be done with it. They hurt my back and will probably sag as I get older anyways. I hate them.

No. 443089

File: 1730905947220.jpg (106.15 KB, 736x981, 1000018881.jpg)

>>442952
"Talk. Louder."

No. 443092

>>443088
Nonna I was once in your shoes and it fucking sucks. Not to mention button down shirts and dresses being basically off limits off the rack…

No. 443093

>>443088
Big boobie women should form a social alliance wherever we go.

No. 443097

>>443088
I love all the big boobied women I've ever had to work with. They've all super sweet to me even though I don't get along with women well.

No. 443185

>>443088
I know having big boobie is hard but please don't hurt yourself or cut them. I hated mine too but grew to be accepting of them eventually

No. 443196

I thought of getting into some normie media to get references and talk to people about things but I remembered why I hate normie music, tv and movies in the first place.

No. 443359

File: 1731031568274.png (669.18 KB, 718x756, sigh.png)

>Anon, do you have (insert social media)?
No, the answer is always no. I hate dwelling on how I am perceived in general, and social media provokes an endless loop of the worst thoughts and feelings in me. I admit I have paranoid tendencies, but even aside from any persecutory lines of thinking, I think most would agree that social media is too pervasive and revealing. Yet everyone still uses it, and you seem like a weirdo for not letting strangers peer into your life! And I feel especially isolated from women when most of them are conditioned to garner attention for their appearance and to compete with one another over it. Sometimes I have intrusive thoughts comparing myself to women I see when I am out in public, even though I have yet to invest any effort or concern in having men in my life so far I'm a khhv. And when I occasionally feel curious enough to check what the girl's I used to know are posting, it reminds me to feel even more vindicated in how reserved I am. There's this one girl that has her bikini pictures from high school reposted on a huge account with tons of likes, and she's tagged in it. Imagine who is liking it and commenting on it. If this happened to me I would be mortified, yet she still posts the same kinds of pictures and welcomes the attention. They weren't exactly overly risque by most "normal" people's standards, but I feel like such a freakish prude when I try to explain to other women why this bothers me. I usually don't think about this since I usually don't interact with people, but sometimes I do want to connect a bit more with the women around me. Then I hesitate as I go over this topic in my head again.

No. 443363

>>443359
Same.
I firmly believe that not having any public social media (and even more so, not having irl pictures of you/your face up online) protects you from bad actors of all kinds, be it predatory moids, shady government services, AI data scraping from all sides, etc. Problem is, I go to public gatherings and refusing to get my pictures taken (when literally everyone else is rather enthusiastic about getting themselves photographed) gets me weird looks or unwanted attention.

No. 443391

My therapist wants me to try to make friends or join a community. The problem, and i told this to her multiple times, is that I have tried to join communities multiple times over the years and ended up an outlier and ostracized or mocked by other members of the community. I don't fit in with women at all and some of my past experiences involving exclusion were traumatic.

I know how it looks and you're absolutely right. I am the problem. I am obnoxious. I am not warm and I'm not a pleasure to be around. I am stuck up and stiff. The best gift I can give others is my absense. I live by that.
It's not just my therapist. Others that are close to me have made comments about my isolation. They say it isn't healthy.

So how can I create the appearance of "being in a community" without actually doing that? I probably need something that just needs a body present and people dont need to be interested in what is inside the shell.

I used to play a high-performance sport and that was a great way to seem involved in a group while being mentally deformed, but I have a pretty severe injury that is going to take years and surgery to fully recover. It's also a huge time suck to be any good.

Maybe I could volunteer?
Find some moid-free DND group?
Alternative is to just continue being isolated which I prefer but it's not healthy apparently? Isn't it more unhealthy to be ostracized?

No. 443401

>>443391
You could just say you’re in one without being in one. Ngl this is more unhinged than just not being in a community.

No. 443405

File: 1731062908833.jpeg (222.16 KB, 952x1003, 1715645859486.jpeg)

>>443359
>>443363
You guys get it. I am absolutely opposed to social media of all kind and never post my pictures online and it really fucks with my social life. People might like me irl but when they ask to exchange social media it's like I'm a creep suddenly. I've had people tell me that minimal digital footprint means I have something to hide (one moid even "joked" that I must be into some kinky stuff, fucking barf).
Even worse, the field I'm in sort of requires me to have a social media presence if I want to have any opportunities because it's all about networking nowadays.
I hate it but I think I'm going to break and make a private account, just never post my face there.
I'm going to be honest here, but I think the fact that I didn't have any social media as a teenager in the 2010s cost me a lot of my social life.

No. 443410

>>443405
I would immediately befriend you. I like people who avoid social media and posting their pictures online because its very dangerous to do that sort of thing. They used to teach us about privacy and Internet safety back in the day but nowadays everyone has social media with their full names and faces, it's ridiculous. I have only 2 friends the only reason I have them is because our parents are friends and I met them in childhood kek and I love them but one of them is obsessed with social media, and this weird app called BeReal and is always trying to take pictures of us together to post online. I refuse her everytime and she gets mad at me and I tell her "next time" to placate her but I think she's really mad I'm not the "ideal fun" friend and the boring prude friend instead. She says there won't be any proof of our friendship but why do we need to show the world proof. We know we're friends. I don't get it.

No. 443421

>>443401
Yeah I am unhinged and strange that is why I shouldn't be around people. It's interesting you could tell from just one post too.

No. 443423

>>443421
I mean I get it, not gonna preach to you especially if you prefer being isolated. I just think it’s easier to lie.

No. 443691

>>443421
Why are you belittling yourself? Everyone is unhinged, some are better at masking or have self control. You aren't strange, you're just bad at playing this game

No. 443761

File: 1731224596232.jpeg (154.96 KB, 1052x681, IMG_4759.jpeg)

I hate it when they post shit like this

No. 443762

>>443761
Are there really women who think this way? It makes me feel like an alien if this is one of the things in their mind. I really hope this is mindset is the minority. I don’t understand people who get obsessed with that or consumerism in general.

No. 443775

File: 1731230736442.jpg (50.95 KB, 736x736, IMG_9301.JPG)

every day i’m tricking people into thinking i’m likeable. i’m no longer the creepy outsider girl, just a normal slightly standoffish woman. it lets me get away with being a loser more easily but while people may not go out of their way to talk to me, they don’t really avoid me either. sometimes i wish they did. i feel such a pervasive sense of wrongness around them. being treated normally just casts into light how abnormal i am under the surface.

i’m the problem and i’ll always be the problem. i don’t know why but my brain filters out every emotion except anger and irritation, i have to kinda fake everything else. i’m so scared of people, specifically of someone managing to make me feel a fraction of what a normal human would feel when making meaningful connections, and to then lose it. if i see them as enemies it makes them less scary.

No. 443779

>>443761
>>443762
seems like trannyposting

No. 443780

>>443779
Yeah it's definitely a tranny projecting its feminization AGP onto anons

No. 443781

>>443761
>NLOG
God I hate this word

No. 443783

>>443762
Some, but the majority don’t. This is a toxic woman thing, not exactly normal. (Source: I have an aunt who laughed at me for choosing ‘masculine’ socks at the store. She’s pretty dysfunctional but it still confused me kek)

No. 443823

>>443762
Some women have stereotypically feminine hobbies/interests and will obviously like you more if you share them or break the ice by talking about them, but I doubt the thinking is as explicit and straightforward as that anon suggests. ("Woman doesn't like cute things? Must be a NLOG!") There are also plenty of women who do not care about girly laptop bags or whatever the fuck, and would therefore never even consider this sort of thing.

No. 443825

>>443781
Same. It's like guilty until proven innocent or something. Like I'm just a fucking oddball take it or leave it.

No. 443874

>>443823
>but I doubt the thinking is as explicit and straightforward as that anon suggests.
Sure, it may be not as straightforward in these women's heads, but it still leads to the same thing - ostracization of women percieved as not fulfilling their social "female" gender role by being GNC in any percievable way.
>>443779
>>443780
Have you ever been bullied for "not being female enough"? This is exactly it and this is what the whole fucking thread is about. Are we all sissies?

No. 444049

I have been single for a my whole life because relationships are a low priority for me. I honestly don’t ‘get’ the social stigma that comes with being a single woman with no kids.

No. 444705

Socially I fit in well at demanding jobs. Deep down I am a lazy fuck but whenever I get a cruisy job I end up getting bullied by drama queens. Why can’t my fellow slackers accept me?

No. 444707

>>443775
>i don’t know why but my brain filters out every emotion except anger and irritation, i have to kinda fake everything else.
I understand you, same happens for me. Add resentment to the mix too and you've got all of my emotions when interacting with other women and certain males too. Really sucks. I wish I knew how to resolve this, but I feel like my anger is so all-encompassing that I'd need a whole new personality to fix this. Oh well.

No. 444714

>>444049
Same, I feel like being single is only acceptable if the reason is religious/cultural or if it's only temporary and you still plan to get into a serious LTR, otherwise your existence is bizarre. This is why I laugh when I see so much talk about 4B, I just know all these women will hold on for like 6 months and then will want to find their pet nigel.

No. 444756

>>443761
God this is so dumb.
>Women will only want to be friends with you if you perform femininity!
I want this to be a tranny because if this is what women really think I'm doomed.

No. 444762

>>444756
It's dumb. Outwardly feminine women can be really chill for all kinds of reasons, or if they notice you aren't into girly things and want to be on your level. A lot of the time it's just a script, they'll comment on each others appearance in an affected high-pitched voice as a ritual (irritating but regardless) then they move on to other topics. And there are enough women who simply don't care at all about kawiwi aesthetics and would rather bond over other shared interests. This reads like someone who only experienced surface level socializing with girls and tries to guess what female friendships are like from a distance.
>here's how to befriend girls
>girls like pink
>no like pink? Nlog, nlog is bad
>say you like pink and girls will befriend you
Kek if this was the case you wouldn't see women into kawiwi alt fashion struggle with socializing. Girls bully atypical women for things that go way beyond superficial markers like a cutesy sense of fashion, it's actually about your empathy, how good you are at making them comfortable, how good you are at catching implicit cues and caring about them. A woman complimenting another on her eyeliner means nothing at all

No. 444773

>>444756
>>444762
>"uwu empath women will appreciate you if you lick their asses"
Uh no? Women are superficial as men are, they don't gaf about your personality. Again why are you itt if you get along with other women?

No. 444788

i have a group of women in my new city that i really enjoy spending time with. we see eachother either once a week or once every two weeks; is this a normal amount of time between hangouts? i'd like to get closer to them emotionally, but i'm also simultaneously nervous to get super close to anyone because i just lost my best friend of 3.5 yrs.
she was kinda unstable now that i look back on it. we started out as just two women with similar oddball interests but she really started going off the rails in the past year and a half (almost cheating on her bf w a 45 yr old scrote at work just bc he gave her attention, having complete meltdowns on her nigel for no reason, etc). she treats her bf really poorly in general but hes just some scrote so i never rlly said anything until she starting treating me similarly. she also said i looked like shayna one time when i tried on an outfit with a pink crop top and it lives rent free in my head.
anyways, i've had similarly unhinged best friends in the past. i think it is because i latch onto interesting behaviors that end up being cow-tier personality flaws in the long run. i've tried to avoid this with my new, more normie group of friends, but what else can i do to protect myself besides looking out for cluster b red flags?

No. 444790

>>444773
I used to (relatively, only in some instances) and now i don't. I don't mean empathy in the empath uwu sense but in a 'is able to correctly guess what the other feels' sense

No. 444824

i’ve never understood wanting to be curvaceous. so jealous of women who are built like sticks and i know that most women think the opposite of that.

No. 444827

>>444790
I don’t think empathy matters when women in a lot of environments (ie offices, high school) are exclusionary and cliquey. Not all of them - there are kind women everywhere - but in my experience being kind and empathetic all the time tends to make you a target, get you called ‘naive’ and childlike etc.That said I’ve been in some pretty toxic workplaces so it could just be me.

No. 444828

>>443421
Well, you called yourself all kinds of names, it's obvious you're "mentally deformed" (your words).

No. 444901

>>444824
Some trads in here gonna call you AAP for that

No. 444937

What’s with straight women assuming you’re a lesbian if you don’t have a boyfriend for a long time? Most men are pretty useless if you have no interest in marriage/kids.

No. 445009

>>444937
I feel like it's mostly a boomer thing when being gay was something you hid, people my age and younger just think you're disappointed or traumatized from a previous relationship but you still need to get over it someday.

No. 445133

I had such an extremely fucked up childhood that I mask pretty heavily with a ‘funny girl’ personality. Those who see through me have similar upbringings but I prefer to not get to know anyone who might understand me.

No. 445246

So what’s your excuse for not having female friends?

No. 445256

>>445246
Do online friends count?

No. 445259

>>445246
I don't have male friends, either. I find it hard to connect with anybody at all. I'm too awkward and weird for regular women, and the rest are either terminally online or genuinely unhinged and kind of terrible people. I'm functional and mentally stable, and I put in effort to be social and friendly, just really weird and awkward.

No. 445260

>>445246
Because i have a schizoid personality type and autism that really should have had some kind of intervention when i was younger to teach me social skills, so now i just roam around like an alien who has no idea what the requirements for starting a conversation is. I think i will always be alone no matter how hard i try, it's futile.

No. 445261

>>445246
Never leave the house, don’t have energy to keep friendships, deleted all my social media after I graduated HS and it cut off 90% of my social circle

No. 445262

>>445246
I've made some friends but I see them like twice an year when I go to cons or meets. I live in the middle of fucking nowhere and I'm terrible at keeping in touch online. somehow I'm a better talker irl than online, I sound like a schizo when I type.

No. 445266

>>445259
Basically this

No. 445269

>>445009
nta but I'm a millennial and people my age have that same boomer mentality too (it was especially worse during middle and highschool though)

No. 445280

>>445246
I just don't care enough I guess, even though I get kinda lonely. But generally it's like, I could try to make friends somehow or I could spend time engaging with one of my interests and then I just end up doing that. Usually the things I like doing don't overlap with things that involve being in situations that make you interacting with people.

No. 445283

>>444824
Same, and the worst part is that the curves don't even go away unless I starve myself down to bmi 15.
>inb4 lazy anachans would rather starve their brains off than hit the gym
Hitting the gym doesn't reshape your bone structure.

No. 445287

>>445246
I don’t care about anyone and no one cares about me.

No. 445289

>>445283
I'm keeping myself underweight too but for the opposite effect cause I have a wide frame and I look decent this way

No. 445381

>>445246
I draw and every single woman around my periphery is either a themlet or a sanrio girl dinner cutesy alt pink type, or both. Organically I end up bantering more with the men because they feel like an alien species. it's kind of disappointing. one of them referred to me with male verb conjugations at an irl event and I wanted to kill her.

No. 445462

>>445381
>one of them referred to me with male verb conjugations
Next time tell her to ask your "pronouns" beforehand because in queerio spaces assuming genders like that is considered quite rude.

No. 445578

>>444901
well they’d be wrong. i’d be devastated if i woke up in a male body. i’ve always wanted to be tall and slim but athletic looking. like a female action heroine (think milla jovovich)..

No. 445905

File: 1732211428097.jpg (61.17 KB, 735x743, sigh.jpg)

>>443359
>>443363
>>443405
SAME. My only social media is IG (which I only use to look at stuff on) and I've been redpilled on the importance of E2EE (end-to-end encryption) especially for women given how things are now. My preferred communication app is Signal but I have yet to make a girl friend who I think would like me enough to use it. All the girls I know I'm scared of befriending because it's social media or texting. I don't feel safe talking about anything personal through those channels and only make exceptions for boomers.
I just want a girl friend who isn't a complete handmaiden and is somewhat interested in sustainability.
I work with a small team of women of different ages but the ones closest in age to me are very into the Tik Tok (highly consoomerist) culture and while I understand the appeal it's hard for me to get along with someone who's interests are buying new things. I'm going back to school somewhat soon so I'm hoping I get to befriend a nice girl who fits the bill or is at least poor enough to not blow all of her money on some shit she won't care about next month.

No. 445908

why everyone here wants to befriend normie women i personally dislike them and i dont enjoy spending time with them

No. 445914

>>445908
It’s hard to find le “weird girls” who aren’t on some dumb shit

No. 445918

>>445908
Because they’re the majority and it’s hard to find other autistic women in most situations. unless you work in tech/STEM or have a lot of stereotypically nerdy hobbies, you’re stuck with a lot of women who are nice but bland and will never understand you. Some people understandably choose to ignore them - others would prefer to befriend decent normies than be lonely and isolated. I don’t have anything in common with 70% of the women at my workplace but I still want to be friendly with them, because they’re kind people (for the most part) and I like supporting other women.

No. 445921

>>445914
I would absolutely try making friends with the other anons here, if it weren't for my anxiety that I'll be hit with the bad luck of being catfished by a lurking tranny.

No. 445925

have you all ever known genuine “girls’s girls” like women who actually deeply love and crave female connection and place it above heterosexual romantic relationships?

No. 445930

>>445905
i'm also very resistant to joining social media to talk to people, i've missed out on joining irl clubs and groupchats because of privacy concerns about their preferred messaging apps. i already have to use signal because of my org so i'd slide into your dms any day

No. 445977

>>445908
I have a very bad track record being friends with autistic women. They neglect the relationship, you constantly have to carry it because they talk a lot about how they care but it never translates into action. They will literally forget that you exist for weeks and months but think it's fine bc they "think well of you" or some other bullshit like that. Also have a lot of weird things going on that can prevent or downright ruin time together and if you don't accommodate and comfort or even cancel plans because of them, they stop wanting to be friends. They want to be babied and don't want to learn emotional regulation because meltdowns are part of their autistic identity so you can have embarrassing situations in public where they put you in the caretaker role but you can't count on them to do the same for you if you ever need help or support like that. A lot of them also are very pushy and don't want to do anything outside of their own interests and show no interest in something you're passionate about because they simply don't like it, so if you change your interests they see no reason to keep in touch and just ghost you and think it's okay. Also don't want to work on themselves at all because muh autism. I keep away tbh.

No. 445979

>>445918
Adding on to this, women who seem bland at first might be more interesting or weird beneath the surface. Conformity is the difference between being accepted or being a pariah for women.

No. 446007

I'm a huge bitch at work and at this point I don't know how to change it. I made one friend once at work and she was also kinda mean and straightforward and the only reason we became friends is probably because we both worked hard and took everything way too seriously so we never annoyed eachother…. just haven't ever met anyone like her again and relating to everyone seems impossible.

No. 446010

>>446007
You don't sound like a bitch just blunt. Though lots of people use them interchangeably.

No. 446012

>>446007
"bitch" is codeword for "woman who doesn't revolve her personality around placating everyone around her." try to become her friend, she sounds perfect

No. 446041

>>445908
Not me. I've tried being friends with normie women all my life because that's who I was surrounded with irl and they're technically still my acquaintances and I hold no ill will towards them, but it never seems to go any further than a surface level friendship at best. I felt like I constantly had to adapt to them and their normie circle of friends back when I used to try harder to be closer to them and it was frankly exhausting. At best I would get adopted by them as the token weird girl and treated like some sort of cute pet but never have any actual deeper friendships like I wanted, and at worst they would stop talking to me over any perceived behavior I had that wasn't normie enough (and I'm not talking about me being an asshole or a huge autist or something stuff like having different opinions or tastes for example). It felt like I always had to have this mask in order to fit in and put in effort in a one sided way while they got to just be themselves only for a surface level friendship, so I just stopped caring. People tell me to make friends irl or not talk to scrotes but then offer no actual alternatives except basically talking to normie women like this or trying to find other weird women online…Who in my experience are either not weird enough, not the same kind of weird, or just act like pick mes, so at this point idk what to do really except being on my own. I hate how many women on twitter for example posture themselves as weird girls in strange performative ways too, just comes off like a normie larping as a weird for online attention to me every time and makes actual ones even harder to find.

No. 446123

>>446041
This is so true.
>if you’re only friends with moids you’re a pickme
Ok how do I make female friends
>idk figure it out sksksksk

No. 446140

I remember there was one point in my life when i was in my early teens where i really thought befriending moids would solve my issues with making friends. I went to an all-girls school and moids were always these weird creatures, but i had masculine hobbies like videogames and capeshit. My mother was highly against me going to a mixed-sex school because she felt like boys would bully me really hard. I have my misgivings with her, but this is the one decision that i am so glad she made and i feel like she protected me with this decision. Learning about the animalistic and vile nature of moids made me realise how delusional i was, as well as posts online where men thought all women who claimed to like nerdy stuff/male dominated hobbies were all faking it for moid attention/ to shill their e-thot careers. But i don't think i could ever find anything in common with most women. Most women aren't like me. The ones i spend the most time with are almost always socially adept and could never relate with me in any kind of way. I sometimes have some small talk with them and they cannot fathom the way i live my life of isolation and limited life experiences. They are always ridiculously enthusiastic about everything and are full with so much ambition and drive, they seem to see life with so many colours and find life exciting. I cannot relate with that at all as i lived most of my life being passively suicidal and being very depressed about the trajectory of my life, even if it is seemingly going ok. Our conversations always end in awkward silence. I've just accepted i will always be alone for my whole entire life and there's nothing i can do about it. A person who truly understands me or thinks i am worth spending time with completely doesn't exist. There's no use even trying to solve it, i've been doing it for a decade and i'm constantly reminded of why i don't belong in normal human society. I also strangely wish I was never sent to speech therapy as a child so i could remain non-verbal and have a valid reason not to ever communicate with anyone.

No. 446143

>>445977
fucking same. my "best friend" is an autist and i'm the one always initiating texts and hangouts. now it's been months since we texted and after 2 fucking hurricanes that affected my area she manages to text "uhhh how r u doing" fucker just doesn't care

At this point "neurodivergent~" people are hardly different from neurotypical normies. none of them have any thing that sets them apart

No. 446145

>>446140
uh yeah we're all going to be alone because life isn't a storybook where everything is controlled by a writer for some grand purpose. nobody will truly understand you, ever. you just have to accept that.

No. 446160

I hate being autistic while being naturally extroverted. I wish so much of adult life didn’t depend on how much others like you when they don’t even know you. I see why autists usually revert back to their childhood.

No. 446172

>>446167
Hate to break it to you sperg but lots of women don't suck dick, you're not the only one on earth.

No. 446173

>>446167
kek she left the containment thread

No. 446197

File: 1732374208732.jpg (27.66 KB, 500x560, 15839f9e3ccc29fbcac0ac8ae85e7d…)

>>446194
NTA, but okay, I'd be pretty radicalized too if I were a permavirgin autist (I basically am minus clinical autism) and my community was filled with sex-havers. In fact, women who have sex I just cannot relate to. Or women who care about male opinions. It has isolated me ever since middle school, when girls started caring about that shit. But stahp bringing up dick sucking it's gross.

No. 446199

>>446194
You accused everyone in here of sucking dick and not having problems so fuck off.

No. 446206

>>446201
Then pls do us all a favor and contribute to the male suicide rate

No. 446208

File: 1732377876931.png (338.79 KB, 535x659, 1623607258668.png)

>>446201
>le male brain meme
Hey if you think you're male why are you even posting here?

No. 446210

>>446206
Never. I live in spite of you bitches

No. 446211

>>446208
I still have a femme body moron

No. 446212

>>446211
If all women are whores and you’re a woman then you’re a whore sorry :3(integrate)

No. 446213

>>446211
Sucks for you, but having a "femme" body doesn't mean you belong here since you're such a male inside

No. 446214

>>446212
Cope whore
>>446213
I still have a vagina, women's rights effecting the quality of my life, untill I'll be able to afford the surgery unfortunately I have to share same spaces on occasions with you I only post on dyphoria thread once in a while, this site is dead anyway

No. 446215

>>446214
You don't have to share this space with us, actually.

No. 446216

>>446215
Which I don't retard I only posted here once, you tradwhores are brainless bye(fuck off troon)

No. 446217

File: 1732379288450.jpg (28.44 KB, 503x493, 1729862055581.jpg)

I really hate feeling that creeping discomfort, disdain and disapproval from normie/feminine (in behavior) women. Sometimes it's too obvious for me to ignore but sometimes it's subtle enough that i second-guess my judgment and feel crazy, only to be vindicated later when the woman makes it clear she thinks i'm annoying and retarded. It feels like every interaction with unfamiliar women is a landmine because of this. I could be mostly silent and they'd still look at me as if i was a bug crawling on the ground. Pained silences, ignoring what i say with an annoyed expression, i get that from men too but less frequently. It's like they can smell the autism coming off me. I'm pretty sure this is not at all exclusive to female spergs, feminine women just are that preoccupied with monitoring other women, including people they barely know. I wish they were less scaredy and stated outright what bothers them, i prefer regular nastiness to whatever this is. But then the few times they've said (to me or weird friends) that they think less of us for not comforming to their expectation, it was really passive-agressive and indirect, like turning to someone else and badmouthing me like 'haha look at that frumpy tard over there'. Pure cowardice

No. 446219

File: 1732379867607.jpeg (89.54 KB, 1600x900, 58nwzuj.jpeg)

>>446216
You post here all the time
>bye
You'll be back.

No. 446221

>>446219
Please don’t encourage soiling my holy thread

No. 446222

>>446221
Kek it was only a prediction.

No. 446227

>>446216
you should become a tranny suicide statistic actually. begone.

No. 446232

>>446217
What about being gnc has anything to do with autism? Its just common sense to see how miserable/ used gender conforming women are. Pretty much every gender conforming women i knew and know now has some serious mental deficiency upstairs. They put themselves in abusive or poor situations because they simply have not learned how to say no.

Autism my ass

No. 446236

>>446232
I totally agree with your assessment, but autism is just one thing that can make you GNC, i don't mean to say it's the only way. Ime it's related to preferring objects to people (broadly), not being attuned to subtle social scripts, not making yourself small or palatable (or failing if you try), etc. Finding it difficult to absorb social norms in general will make you less likely to integrate feminine socialization, too
>Pretty much every gender conforming women i knew and know now has some serious mental deficiency upstairs
Yeah, the more feminine a woman is the more ill she is, usually

No. 446238

>>446236
There is really no such thing as subtle social scripts. You're reading into it too much. I think if you believe this autism stuff, its going to keep you in the cage you just described.

The only social rules that truly exist are don't be overbearing, rude, obnoxious, violent. You can literally do anything you want if you're easy going and have a friendly personality. People will tend to not bother you if you are assertive. Unfortunately most women you run into just have no assertiveness or confidence to take advantage of that rule. Like they stay behind this wall of insecurity and make themselves small. Is believing in autism really such a good idea? It sounds like you and other women like you are just being force-fed the idea. It feels like something tradthot swine would do to play mental games with you. (By now though, you should really expect it)

Being invested in making a positive impression on them that satisfies them is the first thing you have to stop doing.

You really dont have to do that and you dont have to stick to a script. If people give you flack, you enjoy yourself and let them deal with it. Its true they will try to do everything to get under your skin, including trying to tell you whats wrong with you. But I mean thats typical in virtually all realms of society. which is why you relegate get in the habit of stop pleasing people beyond nonchalant pleasantness. Otherwise relegate them to the basement in your mind and let them seethe oer it. The more they obsess over you the better it is for you honestly.

The only reason some tradthot pigs act like i described is because they have a secret agenda to control other women to make themselves feel empowered. They don't like feeling left out either, but i mean they box themselves into their own hells. They're not used to it when it works in reverse and your natural state breaks down their confidence because you just ignore their petty garbage. They're used to people not understanding how they manipulate or why, exactly like you just described in >>446217 . In this post you're doing exactly what they want. You need to stop. That's basically exactly what you shouldn't do.

You need to get used to the discomfort of being rejected by a handful of people because its always like that. Its always just a handful of bimbo swine that do that. And if its more oh well, they are still simple doormats who don't know how to say no. I should be bothered by a bimbos opinion WHY?

The rest of the time its like who even cares. I like to push the envelope and see what i can get away with without doing any damage. This should be your central rule in life. If not you will just keep experiencing what you described. Anyone who projects onto you or tells you who you needs to go straight to the basement in your mind.

I am so over the cheap autism diagnosis. Its to keep you depressed and controlled and thats it.

No. 446239

>>446238
You sound schizo

No. 446242

>>446239
At least im never mired in tradthot bimbo drama.
In my experience they'll almost always stfu if they start to see how much you enjoy their obsession with you. You can make them look crazy for acting out in hostility until they just stop. These kinds of women are honestly really rare.

No. 446243

>>446238
>It sounds like you and other women like you are just being force-fed the idea.
Nah, i had developmental issues as a kid and was spotted on this basis. But yes, it's obvious that a lot of people see autism diagnostic criteria and think 'nice, now i'll have an excuse for my perceived failures and anxieties'. Women are especially concerned by this for obvious reasons (insecurity, social anxiety etc). But autism isn't just a 'social disorder' and it doesn't give you a pass or pause from feminine expectations.
> You really dont have to do that and you dont have to stick to a script.
I don't have to, but i do. I have never not done it. Often i have to make a conscious effort to communicate and i rely on scripts. I also rely on 'scripts' for my daily life and disturbances are upsetting. This isn't because of tradthot influence, it's because autists need sameness.
Plus i've never been told by tradthots that something was wrong with me on a developmental level, they seemingly think autistic or GNC women are moral or ideological failures, that's it. Autism faking is something people seek to cope with internal pressure, maybe they project it on others but it's not quite like tradthot policing

No. 446245

>>446243
If you really are I hope you find a peaceful way to exist.

No. 446246

>>446245
It IS really odd how much that all sounds like discomfort in social situations though.

No. 446247

>>446245
Thank you nona! Hoping the same for you but you seem to have found your way kek. To be honest i'm fine most of the time, i come across as nonchalant, i guess this is why hyperconformist women are annoyed in the first place
>>446246
Well, this is a thread about relating to other women

No. 446282

>>446253
You deserve to die, get the fuck out of my thread retard.(infighting)

No. 446316

>>445977
>>446143
If you have such serious needs for attention you need to start sucking up to normies. You are not the weird strange girls that you think you are. You are literally every autistic woman's nightmare. Autism is literally a social deficit and i feel like you don't understand that they completely lack certain instincts and it's pretty normal for them to be satiated in friendships based strictly on interests rather than feelings. The things you complained about are stuff that is literally in the diagnostic criteria for autism, idk what you thought autism was, but it's not when you are mildly quirky and nerdy and that's it. Please, just stick to normies and stop having a superior complex when you are this needy.

No. 446337

>>446333
Fuck off schizo, do you not get enough attention in your 2X thread? Go back.

No. 446409

>>446316
there's being weird and there's not being a functional fucking person. and honestly, do you think I care if I'm an autist's worst nightmare? why would I want to continue talking to someone who shows no interest in me, where I'm the one who has to initiate everything?

offended much that you're no different from any normie just because you lack the survival skills to navigate society?

No. 446410

>>446409
nta but wtf does
>offended much that you're no different from any normie just because you lack the survival skills to navigate society?
even mean? what are you trying to say

No. 446412

>>446316
NTA but
>it's pretty normal for them to be satiated in friendships based strictly on interests rather than feelings
has nothing to do with what >>445977 was saying. They are complaining about the issues that can make friendships complex with some autistic women.

Autism kind of is a meaningless label now because it's hard to tell where on the spectrum someone is. For instance, I have a sister who has moderate autism, but she has "friends" because she doesn't understand that everyone thinks she is very weird and strange. She lacks all social awareness to even introspect on the fact that these people may not view her as she views herself. She will interrupt people complimenting others to compliment herself, and if someone shares her interests, she views them as inauthentic and not actually interested in her interest the way she is. She is incapable of being interested in anything that is not from her own mouth. She also has lots of grandiose beliefs - she believes she is gorgeous and akin to a Victoria Secret supermodel in appearance, but she in actuality looks like what people typically stereotype femcels to look like. She asserts this to people in public because she doesn't understand how that's socially inappropriate. The point here is that her autism doesn't even allow her to possess the ability to think about whether her views of herself reflect reality i.e. a consensus of people outside of her because she can't understand anything social. It was somewhat difficult being her sister because she could be quite cruel and my parents basically didn't allow any consequences to come to her because "she's different" (i.e. autistic). It's strange because I've realized that while I'm not at the level she is, I clearly struggle with some of the issues she does; I regularly can also be cruel, blunt, and direct without realizing it and while I may be "less" autistic than my sister, it doesn't mean it doesn't continue to have an intense impact on my life.

However, I've met other autistic people who are much more "well adjusted" and do appear to have genuine friends. I've also known non-verbal kids in their teens with autism who seem to be 7 year olds or younger because of their behavior. My point is, it's a difficult label to define because there's far too much variety within it.

No. 446414

>>446412
autist on autist violence

No. 446419

>>446412
I agree with both perspectives, it’s frustrating when the friendship is completely one sided and you have to initiate everything (whether they’re unaware of this or just don’t care) but at the same time I think a friendship only based on specific interests not necessarily emotional support is fine, relaxing even.

No. 446432

>>446410
i'm saying that she thinks she's special because she's an autist but none of them are particularly pleasant bunch to deal with. it's like saying "haha i'm so special because i'm with the alternative crowd and not the bimbosluts" this isn't high school people suck everywhere

No. 446433

>>446419
and I wasn't negating that either but deep friendships with these people aren't feasible

No. 446436

>>446433
as an autist myself i don't think its impossible, just a bit more difficult. are you not autistic? i find myself only really having deep relationships with other autists who can better understand my shortcomings

No. 446455

File: 1732502355883.jpg (146.79 KB, 1080x810, buddgle-cuddle-puddle-v0-x5i30…)

>>446247
I didn't read this. Then you are halfway there. If you are enjoying your existence you are winning. Thats all that matters.

No. 446456

>>446455
obligatory cute birb pile

No. 446457

>>446432
>> this isn't high school people suck everywhere

I don't disagree w this

No. 446469

File: 1732510778087.jpeg (248.9 KB, 1179x1431, IMG_1334.jpeg)

y’all ever become limerent/lowkey obsessive over another woman but in a platonic+1 way?

i think i fantasize about close friendship with other women more than i have ever fantasized about men. i’m not particularly gay i just want to hold space for another woman in an intensely dedicated way that i haven’t gotten to do yet.

No. 446470

>>446469
I'm literally doing that right now nonnie. I felt that way over one particular girl for 7 years straight.

No. 446475

>>446470
7 years… she must be really cool nonna

a friend i had in highschool had that kind of chokehold over me. it’s a particular kind of existential pain haha

No. 446478

>>446469
you don't even know. I'm still obsessed with my best friend from high school (10+ years ago) who hasn't talked to me for like 4 years. I still check up on her and dream about her.

No. 446482

Anyone else feels like when entering a friendship with a woman you end up becoming less important
Like you think you are her best friend but she has another friend who is way more important.
How do you fix this. I want to have a dynamic where I am important, and I am the true best friend, and we have more time together and a strong bond. I want to be considered the best friend.

No. 446483

>>446482
Idk if it sounds a lil weird but I wish I could have fixed this. I swear it's some kind of complex/jealousy issues/attachment issues

No. 446484

>>446482
Find a new "best friend". Your friend made it clear that you're not that close.

No. 446485

>>446484
Yeah but how do I not become friendship-cucked by another girl

No. 446524

File: 1732547954591.png (105.68 KB, 550x762, Tomodachi_No_Hanashi.png)

>>446469
I don't even know where I get the idea of the type of friendship that I want, except that it's literally what I think would happen if someone reciprocated my platonic feelings. It's not something you really see in media (picrel was from an image search).

I've had really good, close friends with lots in common, and one even moved back closer and we've been hanging out. But every time one of us moves away for school or work, it's just impossible to actually be there for each other, be in each other's lives regularly. I'm not closeted gay or into platonic soulmates or avoidant obsessive or whatever; I just feel like there's an empty space there. I meet a lot of cool women and I feel like I should have a friend I can text whenever I see a movie that looks interesting, or bake a cake for her achievements, or hang out on a casual basis that doesn't require her looking over ten priorities first and rescheduling twice.

Every time I hear older women talk about dropping off with their childhood besties for decades while married, then picking back up as empty nesters, I cringe so hard. Is it not possible to just continue a friendship for more than one two-year "season" of your life?

No. 446527

>>446524
>I feel like I should have a friend I can text whenever I see a movie that looks interesting, or bake a cake for her achievements, or hang out on a casual basis that doesn't require her looking over ten priorities first and rescheduling twice.
NTAYRT but I feel you, nonna. I feel too available for my female friends, who always have someone or something occupying their time. Even if we're caught up in the same things, like work and class and a romantic partner, I still have a wealth of time and energy to expend outside of that which makes me wonder why my life is so empty compared to theirs. I don't know how to get "in" with women the way I can with gay moids, who seem to be open to talking or hanging out whenever they're not at their job or uni. I feel like I can't make women value me the same way those scrotes do which is why they don't care to spend time with me, and I can't imagine what the remedy for that would be.

No. 446568

>>446524
thats because our structure of our societies is shit , we were never meant to live like this. we are forced to prioritize romantic partners

No. 446582

>men prioritize their friendship with each other over women
>women prioritize being bang maids over their female friends
>even the media only depicts male experiences, women are only ever depicted to talk about vapid, pointless shit like men, children, and makeup
it's hard to not be a doomer about these things

No. 446759

>>446582
I disagree. Contrary to all the shounen shit anime and brotherhood porn males consume, male friendships are shallow and empty af because males prioritize themselves. Only really young scrotes have some semblance of friendship when they’re yet saddled with personal responsibilities. Most grown scrotes would not help a friend move or plan a birthday party lol. They’re the definition of fair weather friends, they’ll play vidya, go drink, and chat shit but that’s it. Even when scrotes vent to each other about their shitty lives or whatever, they’re still unfulfilled because males are only conditioned to steal emotional labor from women.
Also watch better media anon.

No. 446766

>>446759
My ex’s friendships felt very shallow to me for those reasons. They would remember birthdays but it was really just an excuse for everyone to get together and do the same shit they would do anyways.

No. 446773

>>446766
>>446759
Very true. My boyfriend has a group of male friends, but they're all very catty and start a lot of drama with each other. The only thing they have in common is that they go to the gym together; they can't have any serious emotional conversations and they're always talking shit about each other behind each other's backs. Pretty much every guy I know has friends like this. I don't know why people romanticize male friendships when almost all of them want to kill themselves from the lack of emotional support they receive from their friendships.

No. 446775

>>446759
>>446766
>>446773
Kekkk this made me feel a lot better. The rare female friendship is higher in value than the common male friendship. Like pulling a Common versus an Ultra Rare.

No. 446779

>>446582
>>446759

NTAYRT, I agree with both of you and don't think your points are mutually exclusive whatsoever.

There's talk about male friendship being side-by-side, hobby-related, how you can pick up after six months and don't need to know each other's last names, etc. But it's a bunch of bullshit excuses for why the male way is ackchewally superior. Similarly to how, all the sudden, as soon as men stopped completely curbstomping women in every single facet of education, it's because the system is totes designed for stupid girly brains.

Not to sidetrack the thread with moid shit. I wouldn't switch over to male friendship dynamics if I could. Women's communities are legitimately incredible, as long as they stay female-centered. The reason programs exist to lend or give resources to women specifically isn't that we're weak or unproductive; it's because women genuinely use WIC to feed babies, whereas moids would sell it off in order to donate to a streamer to make them read a retarded meme.

No. 446784

>>446759
>>446773
True, if you've ever had an all-male friend group (or a male friend with insight into male friendship) you know how much it sucks. Even with all their issues female friendships have the massive advantage of actual emotional bonding and support. If you think about it, most het romance is things you'll find in female friendship but with sex and a man in place of a friend.
>men prioritize their friendship with each other over women
This is true, but it has nothing to do with depth or quality of friendships, and everything to do with male solidarity against women

No. 446786

File: 1732648427023.png (216.83 KB, 1017x1869, 47B90926-F7E9-45A7-8773-D0F2BC…)

>>446784
You see this play out to an extreme degree in shelters. Also after this I won’t continue to derail by talking about men’s poor emotional intelligence.

No. 446810

>>446779
>Women's communities are legitimately incredible
It's been my experience that they're just as drama-laden as male communities. Men are very dramatic, often moreso than women, but female art and hobby communities can be really toxic. Maybe it's just online groups. My all female study group irl seems nice.

No. 446832

>>446810
ATYART…I can't disagree with that. I wasn't thinking in terms of niceness vs toxicity, I suppose. My job and interests are male-dominated, so I don't interact with a lot of groups of women on a deep level, therefore the drama is kind of novel and I don't encounter it often.
I was thinking more generally with regards to women being good at community. Like doing the vast majority of caregiving (for the young, old, ill, and the perfectly able men), emotional labor, household labor, etc., across the entire world. Essential shit that underpins society. I think we as women would collect the benefits of it a lot more, if it didn't seem like every culture relies on tricking women into screwing themselves and each other over to prioritize everyone else.

No. 446898

>>446779
>>446832
>>446784
>>446832

No offense but if you find women's communities so great and amazing then why are you here. This isn't the thread for you. I'm so sick of hearing about how women are so group community group communication caring group cleaning remembering birthdays communication group.

No. 446922

>>446898
This is the 'difficulty relating to other women' thread, not 'hating female groups' thread. I bet every anon you're replying to has tons of things she hates about female communities or whatever but we can discuss what we're missing in the first place. Like come on, you have multiple anons lamenting the fact they can't befriend women, did you really think we'd be on here if we thought it was all bad

No. 446952

>>446898
Just because I can't relate to women doesn't mean I hate them.

No. 446970

>>446898
I'm here because I can't get into any women's groups, thanks to many of the conditions listed in the thread description.
I'm not saying that women are just a cloud of warm feelings and rose petals - I'm not one, myself - but yeah, it would pretty fucking cool to have a female friend who remembers my birthday. And yeah, women tend to do that more than men.

No. 446972

sorry for the vent but im about to finish my first year of uni and it's so much lonelier than i expected it to be, and i had LOW expectations going in. this whole year i go to the lecture, go to class and go home. i feel too awkward sitting with others so i'd sit by myself in class and then there would be some group activity and then i would get verbally called upon to go sit with other people and it would be even more humiliating. i never got diagnosed with anything because there's too many hoops to jump through as an adult but it feels like everyone already knows each other or has some uni instruction manual that i dont have that makes their life easier and mine harder, probably some combination of autism or anxiety as far as i can tell. i cant decide if its better to just keep my head down and feel the shame of being alone or if i try make a friend or two and completely embarrass myself in the long run.

No. 446991

>>446898
Us women repulsed women should find each other lol

No. 447195

>>446972
i'm in my third year and my life is still like that lol. except that I just do a bunch of extracurriculars to build resume and I'm forced to go to church so I have to engage with people.

No. 447255

>>446991
Thats a great idea and makes a lot of sense.

No. 447435

>>445977
>They will literally forget that you exist for weeks and months but think it's fine bc they "think well of you" or some other bullshit like that.
I'm extremely guilty of this and honestly can't understand why normies think it's not normal to have some time to myself, especially if I get overloaded with other people's demands or work stuff. Why isn't it fine?
I guess this behaviour can be percieved as "ghosting and ending a friendship suddenly" but why can't you just ask directly about that, if that's your main concern?

No. 447538

I feel like such an asexual blob compared to most women who have no problem dating and having relationship, I'm undesirable as I only get asked out by ugly nerds who are only interested in the idea of me, they want a cool girlfriend who has the same taste in music and games as them.

No. 447539

>>447435
Nta but I perceive it as ghosting and ending the friendship because that is exactly what I do when I want to stop being friends with people in a nice way kek. I used to be blunt and burn bridges when I wanted to stop being friends, but I learned it's better to just ghost.

No. 447959

>>447539
>I used to be blunt and burn bridges when I wanted to stop being friends, but I learned it's better to just ghost.
Why?

No. 448001

>>447959
It's a waste of time and emotional energy, nta.

No. 448010

File: 1733163554924.png (454.76 KB, 576x574, ic.PNG)

this morning i hanged with an acquaintance of mine and another girl i vaguely know, we happened to be alone for a while before classes started. i struggle with finding the right time to speak during conversations so i just kinda let them lead and listened. they ended up gossiping a bunch about some of the other people in my course, notably other women who are not that great at conversation, or don't greet them when they first arrive; it felt really, really strange and uncomfortable hearing them say these sorts of things while sitting in front of them and proving them right. the acquaintance considers us friends and has said i'm "just shy" before, but this along with some other stuff she tends to talk about gave me a really bad vibe. it saddens me to think others may talk like this about me behind my back too. i've never even paid attention to others' behavior to the extent they were describing.

No. 448036

>>448010
You shouldn't take it to heart. They're likely talking about each other behind each other's backs as well. They just seem to enjoy stirring drama.

No. 448055

>>448010
You could directly ask "do you say this sort of thing about me" next time.

No. 448118

>>448001
I suspect that's quite selfish as the other party will waste more time and emotional energy worrying about why you ghosted them.
Why not just explain something in one message and then block/burn bridges?

No. 448126

>>448118
NTA but people come and go anon, it's a part of life and it doesn't warrant explanation. i used to worry profusely over why some friendships failed and ended in ghosting until i was in the opposite position where i was the one who wasn't interested in a friendship and had to ghost myself. it's nice in theory to tell people you're ghosting because the friendship isn't working, but oftentimes people see it as a challenge to rise up to to "fix" themselves or they get extremely hurt and angry and throw a fit. better to leave a neutral last impression than a negative one at any rate

No. 448139

>>448126
>but people come and go anon, it's a part of life
True, but you can't be sure that the other person will think the same as you about it.
>better to leave a neutral last impression than a negative one at any rate
Ghosting is a much worse last impression than a neutral explanation message. It means that the person doing the ghosting doesn't think you even deserve to know what went wrong and "have to figure it out yourself" (passive-aggressive antics).

No. 448160

>>448010
from what i've learned, people who talk shit a lot tend to talk about everyone behind their backs so you have to ask yourself if you'd rather be alone than be friends with people who could likely be saying nonsense about you when you're not there. if you're getting a bad vibe i especially urge you to reconsider things. it sucks. sorry nona

No. 448199

>>448160
oh yeah, i don't doubt it's bad company. but she's a mutual friend of an actually sweet girl i know. i think what got to me more was seeing how deeply resentful and vigilant of other women normie ones can be, it's not often that i'm faced with it so clearly. makes me remember how much i value the ones in my life who don't act like that.
>>448036
thank you nonnie! you're probably right.
>>448055
she's argumentative in a way that gets really under my skin sometimes lol. i'd rather keep her in a good mood.

No. 448684

>>447538
Same, but I’ve learned to live with it. I’m very glad I don’t get harassed and can live my life without having to see myself as men would - but that might just be me liking women

No. 448717

Kind of a weird one but I feel like I’ll never truly be accepted because of my ethnicity.

No. 448751

ill never have a female friend and it really bothers me. i cant help but feel envy of my boyfriend having a friend and its unfair of me, but it hurts so bad. im just too isolated, and women my age dont enjoy the things i do. i know i need to put more effort, but ive never had any luck. and even the online friends i have had end up getting boyfriends and slowly disappear.

No. 448983

just venting after a hard week. i think my problems are pretty much aligned with many other people in this thread's problems. i think other women can tell i don't participate in the beauty industry (make up, hair, fashion), at least not the same way they do, and this combined with my generally creepy, failed-to-mask autism and a shitty personality is making me feel like a total social failure. when the number 1 way to begin conversation with another women is a compliment about how she looks or changed her style, i always look and sound so weird when i say it. this combined with a poorly socialised personality where i say too much or too little, and somehow i always pick the wrong thing to say/not say, is pushing me to give up on this entirely. grew up with mostly male friends, realized they weren't my friends, they realized i wasn't going to have sex with them (lesbian), try to make friends with women, try to conform, lose myself in the process and feel like a stranger to everyone and myself, lose everyone. etc. ad nauseam.

i feel like i'm an extroverted person, i'm interested in other people and the world around me, i try to give people their flowers and uplift those around me, do what i can to help without over-stepping, and so on, but i'm always missing the mark, and i'll end up being too direct or intense, or say something that implies something else, or interrupt the wrong person at the wrong time, etc. even if i think i'm being normal and adding reflection or insight when asked, somehow i'm still just totally wrong for doing so because what i'm supposed to be doing or saying is just so alien to me. so, everyone around me ends up feeling uncomfortable or unsettled or weirded out. both normie and other autistic women see it too. there's literally no hope and genuinely i feel like it's a perfect split of 50% how i look and 50% how i act, so if i want to survive i've got to pick one to """improve""" and if i want to thrive i've got to totally rebuild myself from the ground up and cast out all the parts of myself that are "male socialized". but i'm stubborn and i feel like if i do that 100% i'll just totally lose myself. and i don't even know why i'm holding onto 'me' anymore when 'i' am the sole cause of all my own problems

No. 448996

>>448983
>a shitty personality
How so? Not partaking in social scripts like saying 'girlie i love your skirt' when you don't mean it, might make you feel like a failure but it's not necessary or even a good thing to do.
>just venting
Oh KEK you're not looking for advice but still nona, i'm sure your personality isn't that shitty. Please don't lose yourself, i saw someone say autists who aren't stressed over masking actually have better social prospects because people can sense when you're anxious and uneasy, it's contagious. Mildly annoying or offending people is still way better than coming across as fearful and anxious, even if society dictates that the former is worse if you're a woman. If you clam up you'll only make it worse.
>other autistic women see it too
Typical autist-on-autist violence, they should reflect on themselves a little

No. 449000

>>448996
thank you nona, it was just me venting but advice is always appreciated.
>autists who aren't stressed over masking actually have better social prospects
i heard something similar actually, and i used to be so unstressed about it until i was told to my face how weird i come across and how difficult it can be interacting with me, or even friends saying they feel like they have to be friends with me in a 'different' way. since then, i feel like my guard's been up tenfold, and no one's any better for it. the added layer of being an autistic woman navigating any of this makes it harder, but i should probably try to practice being more comfortable as an annoying quirky woman and face the losses that come with it. i feel like the few good friendships i have in my life are with equally as quirky and eccentric woman and i just need to stop chasing something i'm not going to get (the ability to talk to and befriend normal women (autistic or not), normally) without a lot of pain

No. 449002

>>449000
ntayrt but i think this is true to an extent. there's this majorly autistic guy in my division at work who just seems so confident and unashamed about his goofiness that it seems like everyone likes him.

No. 449015

>>448996
>i saw someone say autists who aren't stressed over masking actually have better social prospects because people can sense when you're anxious and uneasy, it's contagious.
Very true ime. When I mask as friendly/extroverted I get perceived as fake (at best) or mentally retarded (at worst). My natural personality is more serious and withdrawn and people seem to respond better to it. Even people who think I'm a bitch will just leave me alone, as opposed to the bullying I get when I'm fake friendly.

No. 449018

>>449000
> it's contagious
Absolutely, many people can sense insecurity and the desire to be liked even if you think you're doing a good job of hiding it in my experience, it's better to lean into your weirdness than try to cover it up. Your mileage may vary though. Personally, I wish I could make my weirdness come across as being eccentric or wacky in a fun way but sadly people interpret me as being a know-it-all and stuck up. I'd take being annoying over people assuming I'm a bitch to be honest. Sidenote: I don't understand how it's acceptable to tell me that I seem bitchy just because I don't talk that much but if I insulted someone before I even got to know them based on some arbitrary metric I just came up with I'd seem like an asshole.

No. 449021

>>449018
>>449015
both good points, though i feel my natural weirdness similarly comes across as cold/stuck up/know it all if i don't perk myself up, but i'm trying to teach myself that other people's interpretations of me only reflects themselves. i'm finding, especially in office settings, people take pretty neutral things i say in the bad faith and invent a version of me. sure, it's a reflection of themselves, but i end up feeling the pressure of negotiating with that imagined version of myself. but, again, trying to figure out what other people see when they're talking to me is just making me feel worse and more anxious about it, and it's just a fruitless exercise. when i do speak up about myself or express myself in a sort of vague surprise/confusion/etc about it, i end up looking like an even bigger bitch. fustrating, but i really don't know what else i can do other than say nothing forever. 'letting people be wrong about you' is a pretty big sentiment i see around a lot, but i always forget it in the crucial moment.



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