No. 1619551
File: 1687960896090.jpg (57.7 KB, 828x803, Tumblr_l_392281220941188.jpg)

I want to kill myself so fucking bad. I wish I could get out of this stupor where you are too much of an amoeba to even off yourself. I've been staring at my dirty floor for the past 10 minutes. My meds don't help me anymore and I can't even cry properly. If I can post on boards I should be able to do this too but fucking alas.
No. 1619555
File: 1687960975197.jpeg (9.49 KB, 189x266, IMG_0432.jpeg)

I’m taking a long haul bus (22hrs total) and my anxiety is starting to go absolutely crazy. Why couldn’t I be as cool about it as I was in April when I booked it, and why couldn’t I be as freaked out about it then as I am now so that I’d find another way. It’s not even the travel time, it’s the guarantee that I’ll actually arrive at my destination. Pray for me nonnas. This whole trip is turning into a disaster and I need this bus trip to go well.
No. 1619566
Angry at myself for getting fat. I was thin and athletic my entire life, then moved to a shitty, crime-ridden, hot, polluted, pedestrian-unfriendly town (so there’s nowhere for me to walk anymore), lost my job during the pandemic, stress-ate and stress-drank, got on antidepressants and I fucking ballooned up. I’m so mad that I let myself get fat, it’s ruined every aspect of my life. I never want to have sex anymore, and I’ve actively avoided seeing old friends because I feel so embarrassed.