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Not trying to vent? Not annoyed? Not asking a dumb question? Post it here.
Previous thread: >>>/ot/389948
anything is better then Rap
seriously Punjabi/desi rap is the worst thing to listen to
It came from Indian artist trying to copy American rappers and then spread to Paksitan
luckily the only one's who like it are Muhajirs and other esthetics are safe for now
I have been a loner all my life, even as a kid. I've worked in jobs like truck driving, where I was alone all the time. I never had any family bonds, and always had to back out of other relationships using any excuse because I just kept knowing I'd be happier alone. I kept trying, because I wanted to be like other people who seemed so happy. I finally married, hung in there for 5 years, but then left, filled with guilt because nothing was wrong.. Again, I just wanted to be alone. That was 10 years ago, and I've been in no relationships since, and don't plan to. I was diagnosed with this personality disorder, and after the initial horror (Seriously, I think "Schizoid" has to be the most mislabled, misunderstood psychology term there is for the general public!) after reading up on it, a lot made sense.
I could function fine most of my life, but now I'm turning 50, and have gotten to the point of being a hermit, unable to face the outside world, like just exhausted from trying so hard to seem normal. There's this detatchment, like it's all fake, all the people, the things, unreality. It makes even a shopping trip pretty tough! I'm confident I seem normal to others when I have to interact, but it's really uncomfortable.
This is the first time I could relate to anyone. It's a yt comment on schizoid personality disorder and everything makes sense now. I wonder how many anons suffer from it. It makes it even better that it's a woman that has written that because it's often expected from us to be social and extroverted all the time.
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I don't give a shit about my facebook account but since I was extremely bored today I decided to log in. I was mindlessly going through the "people you may know" thing which I really dislike but I was really really bored, but then my ex bf appears. It's been months since the last time we talked, so I coudn't control my curiosity and clicked on his name. Not much to see on his profile because we're not friends there, but I noticed a comment on his profile picture that I think it's from his girlfriend. I already knew that he's living together with her, he told me himself the last time we talked. But I had this strange feeling that isn't exactly jealously. We broke up more than 3 years ago and he was an asshole to me many times after that happened. But somehow, after all this time, I still wasn't able to date anyone. I haven't had sex in more than 3 years, the last time was with him. Also, I only kissed another person only once, only because the girl cornered me. I don't like him anymore, but I don't know what's happening to me. He used to be not only my boyfriend, but also my only best friend. Now I'm still alone, with no bf or a close friend. I never thought something like "no one can replace him", but never tried to that either. I'm becoming more and more isolated and lonely but I don't know what should I do…