>>455666For NA, I recommend the Data Centers; Aether, and Primal.
Aether is the PvE data center. Most players there are into running content and I believe it has the highest population overall. Just know that the designated LGBT server is Aethers "Faerie" server. Nothing ever happens there (no drama or anything I've ever heard), but in case you started there and wondered why all the advertising fc's mentioned being gay friendly, that would be why. Aethers Gilgamesh is the raiding server and should be the most populated one to the point that I think it's locked/full right now anyway, but that's fine because as long as you're in Aether you can play with Gilgamesh players anytime anyway. The rest of Aether is just normal. If you want a house, you'd probably have the best luck in Cactuar or Sargatanas right now.
Primal is the PvP data center, kinda sorta. I've never heard of anything bad happening anywhere in Primal. It's a little sleepy/boring though compared to Aether. If you really like try-harding in ranked PvP and stuff then that would be where to go. Also keep in mind regardless of which Data Center you choose, you can always visit any one you want any time anyway. So you could start in Aether, and then DC travel to Primals servers for ranked PvP. I'd say you can likewise do so from Primal, but Aether is very very full, so please understand that it can be difficult to get into Aether from other DCs (which people often try to do for raiding). Getting a house in Primal is not too difficult I don't think in general.
There is Dynamis, but I did not bring up this DC because it is empty. Dynamis players only chose it to get a house. You can get a house instantly in any Dynamis server, however, for content/PvE/PvP you would have to DC travel elsewhere.
>TLDR (in order of where I recommend + which ones are currently open for new players to join in);Aether: Cactuar, Sargatanas, Adamantoise
Primal: Famfrit, Lamia, Exodus, Hyperion
Google the "FFXIV Community Finder" to see which FC's have openings currently to search for community. In terms of trannies, those are everywhere, but in the 5 years I've played I've never been forced around any, so I often forget they're even there.