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I dunno Shay, it's not like you brought her on a plane to a new place and probably haven't taken her to a vet in years.
the thread pic is good but it's just that i recall there were a couple really funny edits in the last thread that people voted for but anyways it's whatever>>724517
why does she not have a single clue about animal behavior when it comes to cats. it's very clear that rib is more like a feral cat than a pet one because shaytard and fupa ignore her all of the time. plus i'd bet that shay doesn't have a clean litterbox set up, and i'd also tinfoil that rib barely understands how to be potty-trained possibly because shay is not capable of teaching anything.
I only saw one which was >>724433
and it sucks
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Lmfao “biggest dick I’ve had in me” can someone get a picture of his pocket rocket please? Lmfao I caaaaaant
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Of course her favorite obsessed land whale is the first to review her idiotic Snow White vid
also I didn’t realize this but who the FUCK compares pussy to Mac and cheese? That sounds fucking disgusting and of course this fat fuck would compare everything to food.
But really, her pussy “sounds like Mac and cheese” is just such a disturbing statement
I'm pretty certain his dick is a 5 or slightly under. Maybe more 4.5. the way she's talking about it is as if it's 7-9 inches haha.
Her vagina doesn't seem that small, and if she can dry fuck herself it ain't all that tight.
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Her tryna shake her flat bodily butt, as usual.
Her moves are the worst.
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She sounds so unimpressed with these lot saying she's tall.
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She is just ignoring the one dude tipping her and being rude
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Her sound effects are something else. "Gagging" on dem 2 inches
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Hahaha Jesus Christ. She is so bad at this.
She just called him “intolerable” and “exhausting”.
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She is so fucking rude. holy shit
Nothin. I'm watching the chat for about 30 mins now. He tipped her to suck a dildo and she made zero effort. Then when he said she wasnt into anything, he said goodnight 'have fun' and left.
then suddenly she got crazy and started talking shit about him and how he was crazy and rude to HER
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She keeps calling him a fake and saying she banned him before. Why does she do this?
He did nothing wrong but she's been such a bitch he's ended up calling her a cunt, and rightly so.
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This fake moaning ridiculous
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And nice closeup of her breakout
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The doorbell keeps ringing
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ot and not to wk but what are you talking about. not a smol uwu baby bimbo. she's a pretty much average.
and a tight pussy's still going to need a little more than absolute dryness even when handling a more minute dingdong
way to out both yourself as worn out and him as shrimpy lmfao
It’s possible she said it in a joking matter. Like there’s obviously no fucking way she’s a virgin so it’s “funny to say”. >>724512
Discount pumpkins from Walmart. Thriving.
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Love4blondes? I've seen him before in her chat rooms and she never pays him any attention despite what he tips or she just brushes him off. I don't know why he keeps coming back.>>724662
The only three people that ever show up and tip Dolly are: Harley, Foxparty. and Love. Now that she's banned him she's gonna be lacking even more money but she doesn't seem to care.
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when is she NOT drinking? go to a fucking AA meeting, you meth-head.
also i'm loving the fact that her hair is back to looking matted and unhealthy as shit. it's only been, what, a day or two since it looked vaguely okay during her photoshoot in LA?
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Who gives a fuck if its tight, when its covered in lesions and boils, like noone is gonna wanna touch that… except maybe a formerly obese beta cuck from bumfuck Oklahoma who compulsively lies and is as delusional as she is.
Also, more like dry pussy. She's said several times she doesn't use lube or like the feeling of lube, she's mistaken, it's really that dry skin friction chaffing. Kek.
All this person does is buys her friendship, how long do you think it'll take before it ends up like that whole nekostoner blowout.>>724887
She's the LAST person to be giving any girls advice about camming. Yikes!
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fupa posted some pics with his kids on fb so it's confirmed he does at least have some contact with them, gross.
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this is what she did in LA
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>when the editor turns up blur to 11 and u still look like a halloween costume
if you zoom in on the full image you can see much more artifacts, they literally blurred every inch of her skin to the very edge of her tits.
imagine being reena sky and you find out you have to touch the dumptruck of a human being known as shay.
honestly this promo image doesn't look too bad for her, but i feel bad for all the people buying this shit and being met with shay's "smooth" groin lmao
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nta but reena sky tweeted about it and then if you google "reena sky dolly mattel" it's the first result
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She's so lucky she actually has such a loving and caring mother.
It's sad that she always pushed the lies and false narrative that she was abusive or that she's at fault. Shayna's been called out for lying about those claims so many times, that she finally dropped the whole "I was abused" thing and admitted the "abuse" was actualally just being grounded and having to babysit her sibling. It's still shitty that she her a psycho. What makes it worse is that her mom lost her parents when she was very, very young, so imagine the hell Shayna puts her mom through. (check for newfags links)
Her dad prob thinks he did something wrong, when he didn't and Shayna's just entitled, selfish, and delusional. She already made it a point to let them know she's going to fuck up her life regardless. Of course her fathers going to want to check out the place in Bumfuck Oklahoma with the 30+ yr old man she met online who left his 3 kid, loves to slap, punch, and degrade his daughter.
Imagine if she actually traded places with someone who was actually abused. She just likes lying for the attention, and to attempt to excuse her shitty fucking decisions, but it's so fucking wrong.
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I’m shocked he’s still allowed to see them. It was posted on Wednesday, does that mean he took them trick or treating while Shay was camming?
Also god he looks awful.
He looks like he gained some weight. Super bloated.
I wonder if Shay wasn't distracted by having to cam, would she have thrown a fit that he had to go be Daddy to his kids?
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Last post sorry, but he’s STILL listed as single.
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He's not going to want his irl people to really know about her, or her name, then they could look her up and find out that Kyle's gf is known for this…>>>/snow/639470>>>/snow/494260>>>/snow/487927>>>/snow/487927>>>/snow/487930>>>/snow/487935>>>/snow/480326>>>/snow/645936>>>/snow/645941>>>/snow/645943
He'll prob drop that she's a pornstar to is male buddies to score some points, but not say "dolly mattel" or they's be able to look up the pussy boil princess. He tells his ex that she's a "graphic designer" When she can't even barely put together photo and text and have it be legible. He's proven to be a compulsive liar so who knows what kind of lies he's woven.
It’s really sad to see the amount of hate and resentment Shay holds against her mother. I get it, I fought with my mom too when I was a teenager and made some dumb decisions. My mom wasn’t able to stop me from doing all of them. But she didn’t give up, and now because my mom forced me to go to therapy it made me realize I was on a bad path and I’m much, much happier for it.
Shay should have been evaluated and I can’t believe she thinks her mom is “psycho” for wanting to intervene send her to therapy because her only daughter was going to move across the country to be a sex worker. You know what happens to girls who have no family near them and are in a vulnerable position like being a sex worker? They often end up abused or dead. God, how could her mother not
As for her dad still keeping contact; didn’t Shayna block her mom’s number? I’d bet money on the fact that her dad is doing anything he can just to keep an open line of communication with her.
I can’t believe Shayna would cut off her entire supportive family just to be a failing cam girl living in the closet of an obese, abusive midwestern man in his 30s. She desperately needs therapy and an intervention.
Seriously. I feel so bad for her poor mother. Shayna and I are almost the same age and the way she talks about her mom is the way I would when I was seriously sixteen. She needs to grow up, she still acts like a spoiled teenager who thinks she knows everything.
Her mind is totally warped. I can't believe she thinks her mother is in the wrong when her mom says sex work isn't a career. Shayna's mom tried to get her to get a job or go to college; she obviously really cares and doesn't want her daughter doing something as unsustainable and damaging as sex work. I know there are a lot of sex workers here, I'm not trying to disparage you personally. I just think that Shayna's mom realizes sex work isn't something that will support Shay her whole life. And it's really, really sad that Shayna is still acting like a bratty teenager about this.
That makes me sad. he should not have any contact with these children. He's a filthy person with pedo tendencies (not saying he's a pedo to his kids) but how he interacts with shay is disgusting.
I would put a restraining order on him right away.
That was my first thought. No 21yr old dd/lg tumblrina is getting waterboarded for over an hour. Nobody is because that's dumb and dangerous. I swear to god, everything these two say outs them for their bullshit. They're always either making shit up or proving that they're doing it wrong.
I'm also just floored at how terrible Shay manages to look in every single photo, even when she's airbrushed adequately. I totally get that some positions are unconformable and make it hard to relax your face, but that's 90% of modeling - being able to look lovely and effortless while being very uncomfortable is literally the job. Plus most people get a shot of endorphins when they're on camera, even moreso on film, in fucking porn. I've seen models sprain ankles and bruise ribs & tailbones and not even notice til hours later - and they looked great on set.
The fact that this is Shay at her absolute best - in HD, made-up and Photoshopped within an inch of her life, under professional lighting, in front of a camera that takes dozens of shots in a matter of seconds - and she is STILL incapable of taking one single good photo.. it just blows my fucking mind. Even the worst photographer can usually pull one or two good photos out of a less-than-ideal subject. I've seen photos of actual homeless people that looked more attractive. But >>725324
is the best she can do. That face, I can't.
And she's doing this shit for pennies and plastic Amazon shit. I think that's the real kicker. There are SO many camgirls making bank off their work, and without completely destroying their personal/professional lives. Even the average Tumblr thot who just sells nudes or whatever - they're getting the monetary benefits without having to resort to making horror-tier pornography, without ruining any chance at a functional job, relationship, or family life in the future. I really can't believe she does what she does when she's making absolutely jack shit. Any real camgirl/sugar baby/sex worker would be horrified to see how much fucked up shit she does vs how little money she makes.
She's just so damn bad at it, it's amazing. Even the most inexperienced camgirl understands concepts like customer service, not giving away the goods too soon, a regular schedule, not being a total cunt to paying patrons, not having a vag that makes you look like Patient Zero for the next plague, etc. But Shay's too good to take anyone else's advice, she thinks she's doing amazing, shoving Easter eggs up her ass and begging for people to spend $10 on a video of her shitting them out so she can blow said money on pink Wal-Mart wine. T H R I V I N G.
Hoe-ing is the oldest profession in the world. How the fuck is she so bad at it?!
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Shayna pretending to lift his tiny chode, kek
you shouldn't be swollen and in pain wtf? >>725638
yeah I mean I really doubt they're having sex mutual times a night to the point she's in actual pain and if she is then that's just fucking weird cus how could she even enjoy sex?
It was mentioned further up but when she says she's tight or has a small vagina or whatever it's mostly cus she dry fucks all the time like will she ever take care of her vagina???
wtf did her shoot entail if she's so swollen she couldn't even have sex?
Not to mention they begged for a distraction from having sex when she was in pain and swollen from the shoot. Any good man would understand and wait.
Imagine pushing 40 and having to tell everyone you have sex all the time. Whew.
The self loathing is strong within these two. It’s amazing to watch.
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It amazes me how desperate Shay's followers are for any sort of interaction socially. They either buy all her porn, tip her for nothing, or buy the right to text her.
Exactly. Shay and Fupa post this shit to show off like it's cute, but anyone who has ever had a semi-healthy relationship can see that he's all about coercing her into sex, even when she's sore/tired/sleeping and that she's too dumb to safeword. Any actual Dom would be proceeding with a lot of caution. A 24/7 dynamic + a sub who openly admits they're afraid to safeword because they want to "make you proud" is a great recipe for disaster.
But that's what Fupapa wanted: not a sub, a disaster. One that he can get away with with abusing and manipulating. Actual Doms know their sub's limits, know when to give them a break even when they say they can take more, know to check in and make sure they're okay. Actual Doms provide aftercare. Actual Doms won't demand to choke-fuck you the second you get back from a porn shoot, sore and jetlagged and underslept.
But Fupa isn't an actual Dom, he's a pathetic little fat man with the saddest dick I've ever seen. He's not interested in emotional intimacy, aftercare, or anything that doesn't involve his dick getting wet. He's not interested in these aspects of BDSM because he's not truly in it for the lifestyle - he's in it so he can have a legal outlet for his desire to abuse women and children. It shows every time these two idiots post something they think is "cute" or hardcore (ie: hours of waterboarding, lubeless fucking while she's sore, no aftercare etc.) – they just prove how uneducated and unsafe they are about BDSM. Then they get rightfully called out by other members of the kink community, sperg out, and threaten to fuck their Tumblr and delete your dad. They then post a bunch of pityparty shit about how mean everyone is until they get enough asspats and attention to feel temporarily sated. Then rinse & repeat.
Despite what they might think, absolutely no one in the BDSM/camming/sex-work industry is jealous of them. Anybody with even the smallest amount of knowledge on the subject can immediately tell that they reek of inexperience, dangerous practices, and malignant narcissism. They can also tell that they're both disgusting, that Shayna is making no money, and that Fupa is an insecure little bitch that can't be trusted in a BDSM scene or anywhere else. Anyone worth their salt in the community ain't touching Fupa or Shayna with a 10ft pole (even if said pole is heated to 150°F and shoved in the ass). At this point, anyone working or associating with this impressively-stupid pair is basically saying, "I'm an idiot and IDGAF about the safety of my models, their hygiene, or anything else except the edge points I get for posting my porn on Tumblr!" I'm looking at you, lovinglyhandmade. BDSM is a cesspool of idiots for sure, but anybody dumb enough to work with Shay despite the state of her vag is crazy. It's a big community and word travels fast. Very telling that she can't get booked anywhere that creates high quality content and pays models well.
My bad, didn't mean to wax poetic about Shay's fail of a sex work career, but my jimmies were rustled. Least I saged, lol.>>725961
They /are/ putting on a show. This entire relationship has been for show, to show the haturzz that they're totally in love. I'd bet money that when they're all alone together and put the phones down for a moment, they realize they have nothing in common, realize they're both boring as fuck. So then they whip out Snapchat and beg people to send asks so they can gush about each other in front of Shay's followers, and feel better about their miserable lives because their relationship is like, totes #goals, guise!
Shayna herself has said if she could be someone else, she'd want to be her work persona. If she was any other Tumblr thot I wouldn't think much of it, but Shay's "work persona" is so off-putting and awkward, I can't believe that was her answer. Can you imagine being the laughingstock of the porn community because you suck at acting, yet hate your real-self so much you're actually jealous of your work-self? Homegirl needs a good therapist, like yesterday. She'd probably try to fuck him though.
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Clearly needs alcohol to function at this point.
It could have just been shot POV though. I’ve seen VR threesome vids, there’s always a guy in it shooting from his POV to make it seem like it’s you fucking the girl.
But we’re not here to argue about that.
paying for friendship
what a world
You pretty much nailed it, tbh. Just another dumb Tumblr dom, albiet with slightly more Dom experience than our own Fupapa, and a following of his own. It's garbage porn made by a garbage person for other garbage people to jerk off to.
I feel like either him or theropegeek were implicated in some sort of past drama on Tumblr, but I can't seem to find the screenshots so it's possible I'm thinking of someone else.
Lol he’s not s bad dude so idk why y’all are ripping on him. He makes amateur porn, what’s the problem? He doesn’t claim to be a big budget production company. He was just a dom who lived in Seattle that Shayna met at the one kink party she ever went to.
If you watch any of his stuff he’s very clearly experienced and knows how to warm up the models and take things slowly and properly. We’re not here to rip on him, a person who’s done nothing wrong besides making the decision to work with Shayna, we’re here to rip on Shayna and dumbass Kyle.
Lol what constitutes a “real” actress or model in your eyes anyway? Do they have to be super famous? Do amateur models just not exist?
I stg some of you are dumber than Shayna.
Theropegeek is creepy AF. He’s sent gross pictures to models he’s worked with (like pics of him jacking off onto pics of them) and when he was called out he acted like it was no big deal. He’s also kept footage from models without their consent. He’s okay at rope, not amazing, but the way he treats people he works with is shitty.
Lovinglyhandmade has no issues like that that I’ve ever heard of. He’s a fairly small producer and hasn’t worked with a lot of people either.
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Wtf I hope this is a joke if for no other reason than my own secondhand embarrassment as the absolute absurdity of this scenario
They're such wanna be edgelords that I wouldn't be surprised if they just made this up for shits and giggles and fupa was there for actual stuff for his house. But then again, they are repulsive and stupid so I wouldn't be surprised if they pulled this shit.
If they did actually do this, 1, why? Shay can't take much in her mouth as we've seen, why would a tube help? 2, do they not realize people can see their stupidity in public? 3. So what do they do with the tubes they don't want? Just put it back after it's been in her fucking mouth? JFC "thriving" tho
She does realise there are 'O' gags specifically for this purpose right?
So cheap and pathetic shay, but we can't expect fupa to spend actual $$ on her.
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Does this guy literally own any other shirts lmao I love how he went from saying he wasn’t gonna post any oc and now he’s back to flaunting his fish face on tumblr
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yikes… what even is that between her ass and vagina? She’s also got toilet paper bits in there. How could fupa post something like that
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Here’s the full post as well.
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2018's poser emo dad
Homie has a beard to hide the fact he has no neck>>726353
Fupa won’t need to buy any sandpaper with that snatch. Shits so dry it looks like it hurts to wipe
>>726268>lets him see the kids
That's probably the thing, actually. He probably has scheduled visitation by the courts but she could probably take evidence that he's put on Tumblr (or from here) to the courts and get his visitation revoked. >>726352
Here's an idea for your next date night, Fupa. Take her to an Urgent Care for some tests.
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it’s so fupa it hurts.
No but really…does this motherfucker have any shirts besides this gross muscle tee? I feel like he wore this in the first pic we saw of him, and literally every other pic since then. How does he look at this and think, "yup, hot."???
It cracks me up how they brag about buying the Barbie dream house and making money when in reality they can't even afford furniture or some non-fuckboy attire for Fupa. Shay reuses outfits constantly, which is fine but not when you're pretending to be some rich classy sugarbaby or whatever her schtick is. She thinks she's hot shit but her life right now is every successful sex worker/sugar baby's nightmare, lol. Trapped in a red state, far from both coasts and thus far from filming/work opportunities, trapped in an abusive relationship with a freak who pretended he had money but really doesn't. Their life is like an episode of 90 Day Fiancé, except they didn't have the threat of deportation forcing them to make all these rushed, dumb decisions.
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this furby from the last thread is still so relevant lel
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This has to be the most unflattering angle of her ass ever, right? I feel like I'm looking at a trucker ass at this point.
I guess that’s one way to hide all the cystic acne on your ass.
I get that she can’t really change her body shape, but some flattering undies or even a few squats a day would really help her out.
But I guess if you’re pandering to pedophiles then it works out?
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shits on people who don’t take money from empty blogs, while she yells and is rude to people who actually buy her content.
She is seriously fucking brain damaged.
I was thinking this too. he's hitting too high. [not high/hard enough to cause real damage (hopefully,)] but high enough that it's clear he has no fucking idea what he's doing. so irresponsible.>>726751>>726733
I mean, shay spends most of her time in the walk-in closet based on what she posts, so I wouldn't be surprised if rib hangs out in there most of the time too to be close to shay. I'd only call it living
in there if her litter box, food, and bed/toys/whatever measly cat equipment shay has is all kept in there. from what shay has said, rib has had the run of the house since moving in. but snapchat anon pls I always encourage updates of anything
convince his wife to let him see his kids regularly
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sorry, i was completely lost, it looked like that ugly pink plaid skirt of hers and the wearing a balaclava confused me because fupa is wearing one ten posts up or whatever, i didn't know what i was looking at. i don't follow her tumblr so yeah.
thanks for clarifying and not being an asshole about it.
This dumb motherfucker, I swear. Breaking all the rules of BDSM ("safe, sane, consensual") AND all the rules of firearms (always treat as if loaded, never point at something you aren't prepared to destroy, safety on & finger off trigger until ready to fire) in one fucking post. It's almost impressive how fucking retarded they are, honestly. I never cease to be amazed. They make fake guns for stage and film acting, and they're commonly used in kink scenes like this in place of actual guns for these very reasons, and because most folks can get their weird edgy fetish on without actually endagering a life. All these gross fetishists are weird, but Shay and Fupa ALWAYS have to take it one step further into the dimension of retardedness for asspats and edge points.
Guys shooting their dick off accidentally because they wanted to act hard and wear their gun sticking out of their pants is actually really common, apparently. Can't wait til Fupa accidentally shoots Shay in the title and then she pretends that she was totally into it and totally consented. These two are Darwin Award material for sure. No one cares how many followers you have when you're dead Shay, you silly bitch.
What?!?! Shay has neverrrr made up any stories before what are you sayinggg~~~~
Clearly Shay is telling the truth and omg she’s violating all the roools of BDSM which I’m now going to spend five paragraphs describing!
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Dropping some tumblr caps so no one has to suffer through her dash
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she literally looks like a 30 year old male cross dresser
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This is the most unflattering pose I’ve ever seen. Her photographer was probably laughing afterward.
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The heels of her feet, not her shoes. And they totally are. They’ve always been disgusting
Girl where is your ass
it's legs and back there
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Because you know, meeting someone off tumblr twice and then moving in totally isn’t rushing things.
my eyes are going to get stuck from rolling them so hard.
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lmao really valuing herself
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the way her ass really looks vs arching her back so hard and using an underneath camera angle, kek. Why would you post that right underneath?!
Gigi's ugly as sin and will always look like/be a man; one of the few people Shayna's actually far more attractive than.
tho she seriously does look like a homely dude in a dress. If I didn't know her past, and she came out one day claiming to be a tranny, I'd believe her.
back on topic anons>>727146
she has no ass even when she's trying so hard to look like she has one. i'll assume that fupa took the top one? for someone who's oh so supportive of his sex worker gf he really does her no justice at all taking pictures of her lmao
considering how bad she looks in photos other people take of her, i can't fathom why she's trying to do professional porn. not saying she's the ugliest woman alive, but she's not pretty or well taken care of enough to be pro. most people don't have the look for it, but she especially doesn't
Why did >>727176
get redtexted but not >>727171
Also… why do you not know how to properly link threads on other boards, farmhand?>>>/ot/320422
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apparently asking a question is off topic trans hate even though i wasnt even partaking in the initial discussion lmao oh this site>in b4 ban evasion(ban evasion)
I wonder if that was the same new, cunty farmhand from /meta/. Any danger of adding new farmhands that aren't
trannies/handmaidens, Admin-sama?(take it to meta)
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Why does she have to tag him? We all know where they came from
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Notice that "use lube" isn't on her list.
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Really? Only camming for 3 hours
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The spongebob memes haven't old
i love how many "sex positive" types on tumblr will hear someone say that their bf is potentially pressuring them into anal and not even mention that it's ok to say no to doing anal if you're scared. like i read that message and immediately alarm bells are going off bc i let guys pressure me into doing things i didn't want to do under the guise of being ~sex positive~ and anyone with a following like shayna really should have a responsibility to make sure they say that if you're scared of something or it makes you uncomfortable you aren't required to do it just bc your significant other wants it.
idk maybe i'm overreacting but with shayna's blatant poor bdsm practices and stuff it just pisses me off how irresponsible she is with her audience
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didn't see anyone post this but this is from thats-disgusting-emily and is friends with the girl who accused shay of copying her photos (the one with the fishnets and knife).
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damn, that one giant boil almost manages to blend into the dark purple bruise on her ass cheek.
almost, but not quite.
holy shit girl stop idealizing some asshole and pretending he is going to solve all of your problems with depression and executive dysfunction and just go to a fucking therapist
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this SCREAMS “Shayna sent it”
jfc, that is so NASTY. Imagine posting this online for everyone to see. Good luck ever getting a real job, Shay.
and if i were the mom, my kids would never see this freak pervert again.
Goth girl anal is such an original and complex conception that clearly shay was the first EVER to do it. /s
My god she is so embarrassing.
I highly doubt they do anything remotely like this. Do you not remember the soft taps Fupa did to shays face in that repulsive pacifier fucking gif? Dude has fem hands and a chode dick, and guarantee he keeps a shirt on while they’re fucking.
They both compulsively lie about shit to seem so ~edgy~ and try hard. Not sure why anons here are thinking into it so hard.
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ew she’s mutuals with Shay.
she's not, she just used to be edgy and still dresses that way sometimes because fupas obsessed with the "big titty goth gf" shit.
this is exactly like when that girl "unrapeable" accused Shay of copying her because they both had pics of fishnets and a knife. Stupid ass people claiming unoriginal ideas as their own unique invention
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bitch, everyone knows you got your “kinks” from surfing tumblr and trying to find what’s the newest edgiest thing to do. saying that a lot of kinks stem from things we do as children is also absolutely disgusting.
>“I liked playing damsel in distress”
so basically you’ve always wanted people to save you for no other reason than being attractive, and make them do all the work. Cool.
Saying that you pander to pedos because of how you were as a child is really disturbing.
"some of the most depraved shit abt myself like loving anal"
???? is she serious
“Wash your filthy hair”
“OOOO DADDY ARE YOU WATERBOARDING ME?! GOTTA TELL TUMBLR HOW KINKY I AM!”
he did say that! fucking creepy. here's the vid:https://www.dropbox.com/s/toxjit13o9674ml/kkkk.mov?dl=0
it cut off at the beginning but it started with her saying "dad has a bad habit of"
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oh dear jesus this is from her new video
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her infamous "Sex face"
She thinks all the alcohol is just her being cute and quirky for daddy, but she’s genuinely going to become a full fledged alcoholic soon, if she’s not already.
Also kek at her turning her head and the filter going away, looking crusty as always without it.
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I seriously forgot she was streaming. Of course as soon as it loads it's her slapping her thighs and getting tips from Fox
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Losing her absolute mind because Fox tipped her $26
Is this what she thinks is a high tip now?
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Doing her drunk country girl line dance. This is so cringe to watch.
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She actually had to dig in her crack with her nails to pull the fabric out just to do this.
Also she got tipped for naked and she's messing her nasty panties two songs later.
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Time to lose those viewers.
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>I'm not going to bother setting these up. Just know I have cute, pink, disgusting things.
Don't doubt it when it comes to that dildo.
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She really needs to get that nipple checked. Look at the color difference between them.
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Another day, another classic titty grab and dirty foot in the pussy from Shay.
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Her shitty dancing summoned Harley at least. More entertainment for us.
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Big dumb baby baffled by how a sign works. Also Fox confirmed for another female fan of hers. Her only two big tippers are both girls desperate for trash-senpai's attention.
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That moment when she's struggling to make Fox's name on the board "Because she's the high tipper!" and she's not. Cklos has highest over all and highest single.
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That sign is going to be a biohazard soon.
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All this effort and Fox isn't the high tipper.
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This is all I see
File: 1541628264867.jpg (Spoiler Image, 100.24 KB, 1080x791, Screenshot_20181107-220409_Chr…)
Licking her fingers to try wet her cunt. For fucks sake girl just buy lube and use it, spit is not a good lubricant
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And that was like a minute? If you gonna fake cum then at least prolong it, if you blow too soon then go for another one.
Dunno about other people but I don't expect a "cum show" to be a minute long
Reena's nails are nice and trim while Shay's are long and gross (even though this is fake as shit, no lesbian would have claws like that.)
Reena is very pretty and next to shay, it makes her look like a princess.
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she looks like a freakin monkey. And all her noises are so fake
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everytime she pulls this face she looks just like primitive spongebob
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saged because not really milk, but look at the difference in her measurements on her MV profile. bitch is telling people she has an 8 inch difference between her waist and her hips when in reality it's 2 inches. fuckin boxy scammer lmao
the resemblance is uncanny lol
Cover the nips and we have a new thread's pic if no ones makes a better one
But biting shouldn't make her whole tit stiff.
If you really watch when she bounces, one tit bounces normally while the other is just stiff.
Not that anon, but did you watch the stream? Her right breast is more stiff than it has been in the past. It barely jiggles compared to the other one.
I know her tits have always been off, It’s always been a weird color and has had veins, but I’ve never seen it as stiff as it is now. Especially compared to older gifs.
This girl really just needs to see a doctor in general.
It’s normal. Boobs aren’t both equally the same. Have you never seen or touched a pair of natural titties before? One is sometimes softer, or stiffer. One is usually larger. And nipple color isn’t definitely not a sign of cancer???
Seriously that’s just nitpicking that doesn’t even make sense. Get to the milk.
Okay what is deformed about her titties seriously? They are FINE. Her pussy and face are the true wrecks, along with her hank hill ass. Her tits are actually better than the rest of her body.
I’ve seen bitches her age on MV with saggy ass c cup titties with nipples that point to the floor, but Shay is the one with deformed tits?
Not trying to WK but god damn it’s just SO STUPID. You sound like you’ve never touched or seen a pair of natural tits ever.
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5’5 is average unless you’re Asian or Latin.>>728541
Has she shot for any real porn like Brazzers or just her own online stuff?
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i'm sorry but does she mean barbie's 10 year old, down's sister?
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last one i'm sorry, i was waiting for my nails to dry
(pls no ban beloved mod-sama)
Is there anyone who may have a Dropbox link to that video or more screenshots from it?
I wanna see how bad she acted in that one
File: 1541688674458.png (Spoiler Image, 1.66 MB, 856x861, 2018-11-08 09_44_16-Reena Sky,…)
here's the link to some screenshots, i don't think all of them were posted.
peep the scab on the middle of shay's back.https://babesource.com/galleries/reena-sky-dolly-mattel-babe-vr-51749.html
That's probably the most she's ever made. She's going to have nothing after this because Fox probably spent her entire paycheck on her.>>728532
Make that both of her cashcows going broke. You can tell how little she actually wants to cam in that she left after those two couldn't tip anymore.
the point is that in porn, you can make almost any body type work for you. She tries to brand herself as this perfect bimbo Barbie with an hourglass figure, and that doesn’t work for her. She could go with hippie stoner chick that does yoga and shit and it would TOTALLY work. She could go for flexible/athletic if she worked out, she has what is considered to be an athletic build (broad shoulders, narrow hips, long legs) and could use it to her advantage. Instead, she tries to be something that she is absolutely not. That’s the point.
Also it’s funny when she tries to arch her back to act like she has an ass but we all know she has no hips and a hank hill ass.her ass looks like a cartoon character making a sour face.
shes young and if they hand her nice things like this she'll 10/10 do boy girl hardcore for them
porn companies love youth, they will take an average girl if shes younger
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allow yourself to peep the fact shay is literally hiding her diseased pussy with her hand. idk who the poor bloke was who photoshopped this set but he's a trooper
this is the best shay has looked imo and it’s three main reasons
1. someone else did her hair and make up
2. heavy photoshop obviously
3. she LOOKS like an adult lmao she needs to discard this baby little girl shit bc she looks a whole lot better as a mature adult woman
File: 1541700999852.png (Spoiler Image, 543.33 KB, 882x603, Skærmbillede 2018-11-08 kl. 19…)
whats this scar under her boob?? tinfoil but could her tits have been so uneven she got one done and thats why ppl say its "stiff"
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honestly the "angle" of the boob is weird too? at least compared to the one like it looks kind of square in a place that would naturally be round. could be the wayshes standing?? idk. dont think its too small for an implant tho
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“Mom you’re embarrassing me”
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lmao she looks like someone's drunk aunt at the bar
“I’ve never seen real titties before”
STOP WITH THE BULLSHIT ABOUT HER TITS OMG
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But really why did she post this…
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So in the past 24 hours she's done nothing but drink and smoke weed. If she's not a fullblown alcoholic yet then that'll be her Christmas gift to herself. She already acts manic enough without tossing in withdrawal shakes and uncontrolled sweating on cam.
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20 minutes in and the room is empty. Such fame, much popularity pornstar.
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30 minutes in to her show she's changed hoodies to pink, talked to herself, and then left the room again to "get slippers and something to put in my hair" because no one is staying more than 30 seconds.
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>total of 5 non-guests
>all of them leave almost immediately
>"Ooo I got a new bottle of wine in case anyone wants to get me drunk!" to an empty room
>leaves for the third time in 30 minutes
>charging 800 tokens to get naked ($40)
>"I want to get my nails done. I got them done not even a week ago and I want to get them done again. I WANT NEW NAAAAAILS!"
>"I have a bad habit of thinking someone's in my house when the dryer is on. Not my fault."
She rambles so much when no one is in her chat room. Does she not get enough interaction with Fupa?
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>"Hey guys. Thanks for saying something.. It's getting kinda scary. This is the longest it's been with no one saying anything."
>"Well since no one wants to talk.. I'm going to get really fucked up. It helps time go by faster."
Well that's what happens when you mute guests and that's the only people in your room.
I'm betting she'll be offline in 30 minutes, if that.
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>"This is like a week of usage."
Is that normal? To go over a week without cleaning the water?
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Oof that hair.
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Keeps fidgeting with her hair
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She looks depressed as fuck
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>someone offers to send her an amazon card if they can suggest what to buy
>"Uh it depends.. like if you want me to buy something to use in a video, you need to buy a custom video first."
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She will NOT stop messing with her hair, that comment about it being matted must have gotten to her
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>How is my day going? It's ok.. not spectacular.
She's drinking a full bottle in two days isn't she? Also harley showed up and hasn't tipped so Grubby Mattel can't be happy.
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Different anon but just scroll past it? What else are we going to discuss when she's live?
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Someone tipped her 200 credits and she left. When she got back she fussed over her sign board because she didn't have enough P's to cover the name and 'Top Tip'
Queue her working 10 minutes on the board again and forgetting that 200 tip = friend add.
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Went to all the effort of changing outfits and putting on makeup just to leave her headband on.
she never claimed breast surgery, just surgery. she claimed it was from the “flu shot” but if that was the case then that shit would have at least been in local papers. She claims she got a flu shot and started experiencing extreme muscle weakness on her right side as well as noticing her veins were more noticeable. Which wouldn’t have happened because of a flu shot, since the shot is intramuscular not intravenous. Plus extreme cases of problems after a flu shot are so rare that they always show up in some sort of newspaper.
She’s just a fucking liar. Plus she claimed this happened BEFORE puberty, so her breasts wouldn’t have been grown enough for a surgeon to do anything that would seriously affect their development. And no surgeon would give implants to a 10 year old. It’s literally illegal.
She’s just a horrible liar.
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LMFAO sure Jan. You can’t do makeup for shit, what kind of YouTube channel would you have? “Oh here’s how I smudge on my eyeliner and throw on fake lashes poorly, I’m an ARTIST!” You don’t even know how to cover your dark circles or put on foundation properly. You don’t even use blush, kek. But yeah let’s get Shay drunken aunt makeup tutorials.
Make sure you drink at least one bottle of wine before finishing your makeup, or else you won’t think it looks good, kek.
Shayna "so glad I've improved my eyeliner game" Clifford
bitch what the fuck is on your eyes
Yeah, I do it too. I find it strange how so many of you here think it's weird.
Didn't know there were that many dudes on lolcow
she is hammered in this >>728606
lmfao ty for this anon
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i love how she thinks this is because she's a sex worker and not because she's a lazy piece of shit
especially since she just reblogged a five month old photo from the alien video that is never going to happen
and never delivered on 3/4ths of the Halloween content she promised
and keeps limiting her hours on cam
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this is a really snarky response for someone that made videos putting easter eggs and a frying pan handle up her ass
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she posted a set of her smoking on tumblr and the absolute state of the rash near her pussy even with the bad lighting is just wow. also kek @ those scratches. were the tinfoiling anons right about her cutting when she was in her ~uwu im depressed, give me attention fupa~ feelings?
I mean absolutely perfect way to contract an sti, already trailer trash who don't seem to wash and now we know fupa has period blood in his dickhole and she takes it raw while on her period because (?) Who ever needs to live a healthy, somewhat clean living when you can take bong rips from a literally black bottomed bong (Its disgusting, she never cleans the piece and whoever thinks its ok/norm; im glad its not in my circles cause even if the water just appears
black you know that means theres extensive build up or her water is dirty: both nasty) while period blood smears over your vag boils & asscrack, left to dry up while she debates sitting her ass down in the shallowest tub water imaginable.
you meant a uti i think
also – don't forget the glitter bath bombs
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How is any of this attractive? Her disgusting mess of a vagina, her ratty nails, and she’s even given herself a double chin I’m dying
kek sexualizing thanksgiving too problematic
for shay. such morals.
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What even are those expressions. It's like she has never enjoyed sex in her life so she genuinely has no idea of how to at least feign pleasure…
She looks really old, too. Matilda's mother at it again
Didn’t she post a photo a couple years ago with a caption about being at thanksgiving dinner with her family and wearing a thin white shirt without a bra on?
What’s the sudden change of heart about sexualizing thanksgiving ?
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She did, didn't she? I had almost forgotten that.
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Gotta be next thread pic.
so.. shes trying to pretend thats shes suuuuper sensitive but it looks like she never came in her life. How do you fail acting in PORN
does she never actually personally masturbate without cameras on to feel whats good
tinfoil: shay is almost asexual and doesnt care for sex whatsoever
'plz pay for my snap'
also posts snap pics on tumblr
File: 1541803972708.gif (1.07 MB, 255x192, 1402406425598.gif)
while everyone is making fun of her tard faces, i'm over her terrified seeing a willing participant licking that yeast infection ballsack. i hope that pornstar is getting paid well.
I can't believe this bitch is getting triggered
over a thanksgiving porn when she's sexualized children stuff. fuck off, shay.
More like she probably never watches porn so she absolutely has no idea what to do with her face. She probably doesn’t like watching porn and she told Fupa this and that’s why he has this lie of “I don’t watch porn”.>>729724
I actually didn’t think the other girls tongue even touched shay. She’s barely in there. Which makes the faces even more tragic.
File: 1541809173175.jpeg (225.02 KB, 1242x959, A2F37BC3-7853-438C-8E34-8C5940…)
So yeah, she was just lying that it “wouldn’t fit” so she didn’t have to make the video.
File: 1541812453059.png (Spoiler Image, 1.29 MB, 750x1334, IMG_5908.PNG)
Imagine this sitting on your penis that is so horrifying
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In every front shot where the top of her pubes are visible
Something is covering where her sores typically are—from Reena’a hair, hand to Shay’s own hand
We never see the cluster where her outbreak usually occurs
Honestly this video is actually bearable to watch. Like I didn’t want to puke. The editing they did to make Shay watchable is incredible. I mean it’s still cringe but it’s not downright disgusting. On top of that, this other girl is actually hot so she makes every second of this.
But also I feel like this is just such a better thing for Shay them those gnarly decrepit someones basement-esque dungeons she keeps appearing on looking like a lost kid off the short bus.
They have all different download options for different phones/viewers. The uploaded probably just downloaded the one that works on their device, hence why it may not look the same on other devices.
Whatever. I still think it makes her look like a daddy long legs, kek.
sorry if it was unclear, what i meant is that i agree with you, that's why it looks weird, i was just confused as to why it would look normal on someone else's desktop but warped on mine. >>729836
anyway you're probs right anon
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buy a whole month of sexting, only get 15 minutes. That’s such a horrible rip off, my god.
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at least he didn’t say anything about her funky looking pussy.
SN: I hope that Reena got PAID for this shoot. They shoukd have given her gloves and a dental dam.
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Hey when fupa cuts her off maybe she can go work at what a burger
This looks like an outtake, jfc.
I was expecting this to devolve into him forcing his chode into her dry asshole or something, but this is surprisingly wholesome.
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Same view during the day
you sound like Shayna trying to figure out why so many people dislike her. “It’s just jealous haterz on lolcow! No one could ever really dislike me.”
If you don’t like the thread, no one is forcing you to stay.
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It’s like someone went and made a porn version of “Wrong Turn”!
the most recent comment calling her bangs "funky" is pretty obviously not a farmer if you bother to look at their post history like >>730046
>random joe thinks Shayna has funky bangs>Shayna has always had terrible hair>farmers: REEEEEEEE COWTIPPING
Is it that much of a stretch to think that this guy had a totally honest opinion about her shit hair and he has no idea lolcow exists?
I know this thread is shit most of the time but please.
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Why even bother posting something so dark and potato quality? I'm still confused on this ~alcoholism is an asthetic~ thing she's on lately too
She’s really bad with lighting. This could have been a good picture if it was done by someone who understands how to edit it properly and use the lighting to their advantage.
Unfortunately we don’t get any of that with Shayna.
bacterial infections can be overlooked easily by docs actually. Maybe she has a bad doctor and I can imagine she doesn’t do routine visits there if she looks like that.
I bet she has
(which can be really common if you don’t clean your toys)
When you see the reflection of her lips on the mirror…
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lol, I’m sure whataburger and alcohol is really the way you’re gonna get that body back, Shay.
lol look at her powerful stomach sucking in skills and flat butt
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They probably don't like Shay and Fupa either.
>>730314>implying horny dudes don’t roast girls on the web all the time
Why don’t you look at the guy’s posting history? Actual non-farmers can have an actual opinion about a cow and it not be a farmer, regardless of how often a cow is tipped. And it’s pretty obvious when it’s a farmer vs not. And some anons are out for blood with the one horny dude who’s probably not a farmer.
If you have proof otherwise I’m all eyes.
people who watch porn typically pay attention to whether the stars are actually attractive? Also Shays bangs are fucked in the video its not really a "small detail"
It's obvious when it's a tumblr anon or throwaway mfc account but not when it's a reddit user with a post history
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From full time stoner to full time alcoholic? Goals.
Damn, what we are seeing from this chick is her being the "best" her? Sleeping on the floor, not washing, infected puss, alcoholic, shitty personality, scamming people, etc is the best Shayna can be??? I think all those things are actually what mental illness looks like. What would be best is getting some help. Drink some water, shower, put down the bottle, and get some help.
what i'm learning here is i don't watch porn, go where men go on the internet, or spend time in their presence whatsoever enough to think about these things, and my impression of them is that they're so absolutely retarded by nature and have zero standards that they wouldn't notice or care.
i still think some people are cow tipping and self posting sometimes. this is the last derail from me. sorry.
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…… Why would he take the etra unnecessary step of marrying her when hes just going to do everything theyre already doing now, only with a ring on her finger lol
Hes comfortable and in a position with someone who's so willing to give everything she has to someone, he wont ever propose lol
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Reference photo I found from back then. Looks fine skin-wise, only started getting visibly fucked up after she became dumdolly/dollymattel
Tbh I really don’t know why she got rid of the bush. If she kept it trim it would have been fine.>>730692
There’s definitely pics from her early cam shows where she did have huge noticeable pimples through her bush, those were closer to her asshole. It was nasty. It probably just spread now that she waxes and the pores are open to infection easier.
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how is it possible that she’s just now seeing Harry Potter? maybe she wasn’t a big reader but Harry Potter was and still is everywhere.
she was too busy watching spongebob>>730724
she can't take dick, period. she can't suck dick. can't ride it. can't even jack a dick. she's even more awkward when with a woman. nothing about the way she moves, talks, or does anything is sexy. who lied to her and told her she would make a great sex worker/porn actress?
it's so funny comparing how reena does doggy and then how shayna does it. had me laughing.
girl can't even do that one thing right lel
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Shays body looking like a penis wth is that
Also the contrast between these two is wild, reena actually fucks the guy while shay is there perfectly still lmao. Also her stock porn dialogue is so dated(use the spoiler feature)
A reasonable response in any other situation, but you could say the same thing about her moving cross-country into a house with him after seeing each other twice. >>730726
Eh, can kinda let that pass, it's not like she's claiming she's never heard of it. There are people who haven't seen it or just don't care.>>730760
Reena looks like she's about to tell her to get her shit together.
Remember when he made a remark about marrying her and she lost her mind with excitement only for him to go "It was a joke". Good times.>>730760
Shay is the type to just lay there and make faces and noises then expect to get paid for it. Probably why she got into BDSM. You have an excuse to do nothing if you're tied down.
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i know people keep calling her matilda's mom, but for real
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I can’t tell if she’s trying to suck a nut, lick it’s ass, or is licking that yeasty area between the groin and thigh.
and hey Shayna, take some blowjob tips from Reena.
Reena is so gorgeous here and Shay makes the worst faces. Also, her fake noises are extremely obvious. She has zero idea how to be sexy, which is odd, since that's her 'job.'
so much yikes
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She surely can’t be making enough money to be working nine hours a week
lol "MV Live"
at some point maybe she'll realize it's her, not the platform she's using
Fupa isn’t charging her rent(most likely) and, judging from comments he’s made, not likely charging her for utilities. Her parents likely pay her cellphone bill, she doesn’t have a car so she doesn’t pay for car insurance or a car note. She begs for money for her nails and her hair, and her diet consists of Walmart wine and the dollar menu.
Yes. She makes as much as she needs which is literally a handful of 20s.
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She’s on MFC. Sick in sweatpants. BUT with clean bong water
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Complaining that no ones talking to her and that everyone’s boring then proceeds to talk about grapes.
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she's been sneezing for like the past two minutes. It's probably the most interesting two minutes of her ever
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only one, the boy
lmao i made a joke in response to >>731702
i'm not actually religious, they might be though.
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I really can’t stand this fake positivity “I love everyone” bullshit she’s been trying to push. She’s been a racist cunt,has talked plenty of shit about other sex workers, had praised hitler, has used her high follower count to get away with acting like a deplorable person, and now acts like she’s some beacon of positivity in the sex work community.
She’s just a disgusting lying pig. Go choke on you fake positivity, Shayna. You don’t actually want anyone to be happy but yourself.
please refer to >>731845
it fully applies to you lol
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past thread pic related
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I continue to be confused that whoever hires her doesn’t set her up with even one of these many things.
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Also. Why is this visual so jarring. Snap people where’s the milk?
It’s very rare to find a porn agency that will pay for those things. Especially if you’re a new performer. It’s funny how at first she really thought those things were paid for her, and she was bragging on cam about it. They paid for her first trip, so she could take promo pics for them and stuff. And she assumed they’d continue paying.
If you know you’re going to be going back and forth to LA, and you claim to make so much money, why the FUCK don’t you have some saved for those times? She is such a pathetic piece of shit.
Ah ok. I’m not in porn but other fringe SW and if I get brought somewhere to shoot, I either get flight lodging or both paid for as well.
Regardless. Imagine if she had gasp
friends in the area and could stay with them for free?
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Her hair is getting back to that weird blue/gray color. Why doesn’t she just go for a yellowy blonde if she really wants to be blonde? Clearly her hair doesn’t work with white blonde and blue toners. Or shit go back to dark brown which actually looked nice.
Whenever she makes that face I think she looks like a South Park character, specifically Butters>>732284
I'm so tired of seeing those damn calluses on her feet. Callus removers are not expensive…>>732286
Is Shayna still friends with Robin or did she fuck that friendship up too?
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The golden blonde with brown roots looked nice when she had it that way for Stoner Shay and so did the natural curls. Her hair can look nice when she doesn't abuse it with straighteners and bleach
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eh it's because her hair is naturally is naturally really curly and well she's never taken care of herself but at least it fit in with her aesthetic then
She looked better because she was younger and wasn't an alcoholic yet
It's too late for her to go back to this, damage is done
I'm horrified by how disgusting the undersides of those nails have to look after scraping out her rectum. I can't imagine it feels very good. >>732306
Getting rid of her wonky, messed up bangs would already be a huge improvement.
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is it learning??
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Derp face incoming.
Does she really think this is cute?
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>says living on a farm is a dream
>wants to simultaneously live a bimbo barbie life
okay she can’t be this fucking stupid. cows are nothing like puppies. she’d probably get headbutted by one or get some dirt on her and freak out.
double post, but the fact that Fupa is pushing and encouraging the alcoholism is just awful.
But ya know, he’s being “supportive”
Fupa's a piece of shit, anyone who cares about you would not encourage alcoholism. I understand enablers but someone who actively pushes you to drink when you have addiction issues with it is trash.
If my bf/friends/family did/say the shit he's doing to Shay I'd be disgusted and know that's not a person who even likes you, let alone loves you.
Yours truly, an alcoholic.(blogposting)
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She's really wearing the same red sweater and beanie from last years holiday video
because then literally no one would buy her porn. no one in their right mind wants to see a fat chode with a fupa fucking an infected vagina.
at least with the vids she makes now she gets some money because of all the pedos and weird people who like seeing girls punch themselves I guess.
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Why is a woman with just a head and no body biting Shayna's arm? Who thought this was good graphic design??
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Confirmed: she cuts her own bangs
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Why does she think she has anything but a flat hank hill ass? Plus this derpy “I have autism” face is NOT CUTE.
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Translation: I have no money and need to get to LA
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Rose is the only wine that is pink, Shayna. Stfu you idiot alcoholic.
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and then Fupa takes her out for food anyway. But she needs money for food. Right.
Maybe instead of trying to pretend you face tough problems real sex workers face (like not having food or being homeless) you could just be honest. At least TRY and remember your lies, ffs.
yeah lol for someone who hasn't cut their hair in years it sure hasn't grown AT ALL. stop killing your hair shay or soon you will be bald.>>733461
tfw your s/o is too embarrassed to be seen going out to an actually romantic
dinner with you, so he makes you stay in the car
shit, her skin is looking so
rough. you can wear makeup other than eyeliner and eyelashes, shay. although I guess that would take some tiny amount of skill to apply and would probably just make her look cakey and even more washed out.
lol but her “daddy” took her out for food so clearly it’s not like she’s going hungry and needs food. It’s just another ploy to get money for LA.
She makes fun of homeless and abused sex workers yet uses those same issues to profit for herself.
Cute that she's trying to style he hair the way they did for that shoot everyone thought she finally looked decent in. I see u girl. >>733475
If the whole theme of this video is her wearing pajamas, why take her top off completely instead of just pulling it up?
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how can you make a clothing line when you can’t even dress yourself in colors that match/work with each other? She literally thinks baby pink plus hot pink plus bubblegum pink is an outfit. Just….head desk.
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What Shay thinks she looks like vs. What she actually looks.
Nit picking but it bothers me so hard that she tries to be Barbie with BROWN eyes. Buy some fucking solotica lenses. Jesus.
Plus I’d love to watch her herpes eyes get all infected from not taking it out ever
This is probably one of the dumbest nitpicks I've ever seen.
If the fantasy is supposed to be "teehee I'm sucking your dick," wouldn't it make sense to go for a POV thing? Mount your camera and stick that dildo to the wall or something; make it more realistic than you just sitting on the floor slobbing on a hunk of silicone.