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Don’t ask for Tesah’s nudes and don’t involve her family or her exes (with the exception of Dahvie). Don't involve Canyon’s other exes. Don't contact/post about other sex workers connected to Tesah or Canyon unless they provide milk. Don't acknowledge Canyon's selfposting; just report, and remember that this is an imageboard
Tesah Jordin is a SW/dancer , formerly of Chicago but now based in Raleigh, North Carolina, whose initial claim to fame was sleeping with Dahvie Vanity. She's an obligatory BPDfag and has a taste for shitty scrotes with face tattoos. Enter Canyon Monfrado, her cuck tryhard BF who spends his time trying to go viral and failing miserably when they're not both filming cringy, small dick, Hank Hill ass OnlyFans porn or having screaming matches and throwing furniture at each other.
Last time on "24 Hour Lolcow.com People"…
>Canyon dumps Tesah (the first time), Tesah immediately posts stories with another guy >>926515 >holds Canyon's documents hostage while manipulatively texting him >>926520>Tesah sneaks off to Florida to fuck Dahvie again >>933921 and then goes on Chris Hansen six weeks later >>963757>is straight edge for two weeks >>928536 before going back on booze >>933923>gets back with Canyon and breaks quarantine to travel with him (an essential worker at the time), he breaks up with her during and records her freak out which includes suicide baiting >>958229>Someone cowtips Tesah, who in turn cowtips Canyon, and Canyon begins self posting his autism>Canyon samefags to try to bait farmers to call his dick "nice" and "not small" only to self post his dick and prove us right >>976197>Tesah gets arrested for assaulting Canyon >>984578>RIP LEGEND >>984580>Canyon promises his dad to not get back with Tesah; immediately breaks that promise >>984944>Tesah gets not one >>1007780, but two face tattoos >>1015262, as well as a chest piece that she leaves unwrapped and lets Canyon cum all over the chest piece while it is healing >>1017548>Tesah uses TikTok to make softcore kink content >>1015239 and promote her OnlyFans, exposing potentially millions of young girls to sex work>Canyon starts cringe Facebook meme pages to try to go viral; fails miserably>says they're gonna start a metal band called "Arch Enemy" without realizing it's already a group >>1021326. It could very well be a troll but who knows with these two.>Anon brings milk that Tesah skinwalked Dahvie's ex-fiancee during his entire relationship with her >>1023270>anons offhandedly discuss Tesah's forehead mole; she proceeds to sperg on IG about it confirming she lurks>they get a new kitten and Tesah constantly posts about how the kitten supposedly loves him more than her >>1026203
BACKUP >> https://www.instagram.com/tesahjordinxx
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I got this but not much else.
Then gtfo the Internet, no one wil miss you.
Also yeah this thread pic is shit, the caps are unreadable
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Ravine’s job venture that he hyped up turned out to be nothing lol shocker
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At least he admits it
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that cat is most definitely not 4 months old
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Sage because we all knew the cat wasn’t 4 months old… but here is Tesah saying that it’s 8 weeks old.
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That's funny becausee posted this only the other day kek
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Fucking idiot. Made a whole page for attention and now covering his tracks
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??? How is this relevant to the question
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I thought that I was retarded too. Since we're still giving him the attention he's so desperately reaching out for, here anons, we've got another mention>Alex Jones
Well, I do worry about the chemicals in the water that are turning the frogs gay
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it was deleted but since when was he "a guest on many podcasts"??? lmaooo dude is so delusional I can't……
and there is NO way he isn't asking himself some of these questions like the one asking about his music (also fucking deleted)…kek this song is fucking horrible i've never seen a more punchable face….
sorry for fucking blogpost but link for the curious…be warned:https://soundcloud.com/canyonmonfrado
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The obvious photoshop on her tits
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To the anon who said Tesah was skinwalking Fallon, does this count?
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Orly?? I mean hey, I'm all for anyone doing whatever the hell they want, but this retard literally posts shit like this to bait I feel. He's so obsessed to see what is going to be said aboit him. I've never witnessed someone so hungry for attention, even if it's the worst kind of attention possible. What an absolute babydick fuckbuckle. Kek
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He is baiting. Crayon gets desperate everytime we stop talking about him for half a day. Case in point.
>This drink is super salty bro, tastes like L.O.Lcow farm faggy laugh
Not being able to comprehend the makings of a good joke only makes him more of a gayfish kek
I know I'm giving him what he wants, but the dude's so retarded it's hard to restrain myself. This "man" is nearly 30 and he reminds me of an adhd diagnosed preteen. From the the autistic dick sperging/posting, samefagging a vendetta against his own girlfriend - to continually posting fanfics about the user base here under the guise of "trolling". (We all know he sends those asks to himself). This creature is an anomaly, and it's a struggle turning away from the entertainment.
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Slightly better with makeup and extensions but whoever said she's skinwalking Fallon is bang on
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>I wasn't made for you
True, but the foundation of your business is your looks.
Bimbo fetishists aside I like her new Fallon 2.0 hair, it looks much healthier and like >>1029973
said the fringe does a good job of covering the shitty tat.
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that might be intentional - looks like she's exploring daddy kink again
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She looks hideous without makeup and all her little Instagram and Snapchat filter
Can't unsee it now
Congrats on looking like a tranny Tesah
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The comments on this are fucking hilarious
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Most recent Twitter post. I thought I was seeing things, but nope. She’s literally pissing while posing trying to look “sexy”
She just gets more trashy every day.
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Soz for samefag but I found AIDS
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How her body actually looks without photoshop
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Implants almost to her neck
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Did she fuck up the shoop on her socks or am I having a stroke
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Imagine this was your life
What a weird cope. She’s not wrong, but you don’t have to go to Instagram to set the record straight about your blown-out pussy over a single two-letter comment, insecure ass weirdo.
Also we’ve seen Crayon’s crayon, we know full well it’s not doing much damage.
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Bitch Daddy is in the hospital and doesn't know what a gallbladder is
So I'm "sick", the "doctor" thinks it's my "gallbladder" or "gallstones". I'm "excited" to lose "weight"…
Don't worry Crayon you've already lost the weight most people carry around… In the cranial region
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Cringe. What grown man fucking uses "vewwy"
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I smell desperation>>1031598
Also, get off the thread Narco you can't integrate to save your life. Kek at you doing the opposite of what you wrote on IG.
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Double kek at how this random coke head thinks Tesah is copying her. The established narrative is she's copying Fallon, how narcsessistic of her to co-opt that despite reading here.
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Lastly look at how tilted pointing out her narcsessism months ago made her. She made a story dedicated to it next to the narcsessistic sperg about Tesah KEK.
You can have BPD and be narcsessistic, the two aren't mutually exclusive and one isn't necessarily an illness (it's an adjective kek) unless heightened beyond the norm. Too lazy to point out the autismo logic any further so I'll just leave the quote here:
>Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder that frequently co-occurs with borderline personality disorder (BPD). The addition of NPD into the diagnostic picture may complicate the treatment and course of BPD.
The months old shit this cap is referencing:
My post >>977993
Her response >>978025
Post exposing her vendetta >>978056
Her obligatory chimp out >>978547
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Bitch Daddy made it to Atlanta last night and now can't get out bed because of his "?gallbladder?". He said he's going to have to have surgery and recover there. Cue Tesah having a co-dependent meltdown shortly.
Because her chimp out was funny and she thinks Tesah is copying her >>1031674
It is just that though, a side quest.
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Canyon made a post about this chick because of that other anon bringing it here lol. I hate to side with these 2 but that girl is gross is clearly jealous of Tesah
I don’t know why you’re still here, but if farmhands don’t see fit to ban you, please try to integrate.
Click the number of the post you are responding to and it’ll automatically link it in your reply. Type the word “sage” in the email field if you don’t have anything meaningful to contribute (which so far has been every single post you’ve made.) Double (and triple) posting is generally discouraged; say all you have to say in a single post. Delete and repost it if you’d like to add more, but also remember that not every thought that flows through your stream of consciousness is valuable nor needs to be said.
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Is that… canyons music….
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Holy fuck those tits are ghastly. The angles that those cockeyed frankentits are pointing individually fucking killed me lmfao tesah girl you absolutely got played kek
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Sorry guys, im starting to like this guy
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We're not going to praise you for the bare minimum, Crevasse.
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I've always thought he looked like sid the sloth
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If anyone was wondering, we've got like 6 stories of sadposting lyrics and music on Tesah's end, that's why Crayon came and posted this about her >>1032927
Ladies and gentlemen I give you two perpetual children LARPing as adults.
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Now he’s a writer??
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Her nose is huge is these "natural" selfies
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Shut the fuck up
Is this a wig? It just showed up like this and I don't remember anyone talking about it. Maybe it's just extremely damaged but it looks fake. Like it doesn't work for her skin tone.
Was this what Michael was referring to when he said he told her to change her hair?
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SOMEBODY FUCKING SAY SOMETHING ARE WE GOING TO JUST TAKE THIS FROM THIS TWAT(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
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Oh my god he’s doing it again. SOMEBODY SAY SOMETHING THIS ISNT OKAY! I HATE HIM! FUCK YOU FANYON(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
Learn to integrate, retard.>>1034021
I didn't even know that was Tesah at first, she looks completely different, jesus. I prefer her blonde hair
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Canyon thinks he's accomplishing something. I wonder how he feels about his girlfriend getting dogged out on this site on a daily basis
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Sure thing, Crayon
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Gee roseart, way to shit up your own thread larping as an anon offended on behalf of an imageboard.
This thread needs to be nuked
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Rearrange her guts as in punch her back when she hits him when she gets blackout drunk? And everyone wants to fuck you? Is that why you have 50% off on your of like all year long???
Contrary to what Ravine posts on IG, a lot of the anons in this thread are himself desperate for grains of attention from random strangers. He was outed for shit talking his own girlfriend (whilst sympathising with himself) in the previous thread, and for posting his own dickpick for gratification. If he didn't enjoy the moderate attention he wouldn't have hijacked his girlfriend's stagnant thread resulting in the one you're currently sperging in. Nor would he constantly post here, screencap it, and then upload it to his IG the moment we stop discussing him. We're not some club dedicated to hating the public trainwreck, most of us just pop in from time to time to observe the mess.
I can't believe I'm bothering to respond to this but we're an imageboard filled with women. I don't think anything needs to be said further about our capacity to "get banged" kek.
Oh wow I just went through the new thread and can't believe Tesah's boyfriend actually spams his own stories with lolcow posts now. That's so…Sad. He obviously cares so much about this thread that it's taking over his personal life >>1029896
this one is particularly bad because even in his downtime and in public he's obsessing.
Even if you did embrace it, like some sort of onision vibe, it's such a tiny thread in comparison to other cows. Theres literally no way to be proud whatever way you look at it. Then he goes and advertises that to his followers. How embarrassing.
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This is what irritates me about "sex workers"…it's the lazy way out. Its not hard work. Its not hard work to take off your clothes and have a camera on for what u do on a daily basis. Jobs have people laid off all the time, they figure it out. Yall wanna call it a job, well this is reality. Suck it up.
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Looks like Tes.t.d. forgot to photoshop her waist. We see you Plank from ed edd and eddy looking ass. Kek
Whores like that like to pretend it's an actual job that deserves respect.
I think only a handfull of people are posting in this thread on a regular basis but I think there are a lot more anons silently lurking the cows so I can imagine Tesah's boyfriend whatshisname actually saw an increase of views on his insta stories after interacting with the forum for the first time, so this is what makes him act out like this ever since he got the sweet rush of bigger views.
I stopped lurking his stories because of that. thanks for the kind anons bottlefeeding me his latest cringe here though.
I actually got a few more where he spergs for a for a paragraph or so, and then hours later alleges that he's turning over a new leaf and leaving LC alone. Although I'm sure he'll still read here. He's just trying to persuade his audience of his innocence in typical Crevasse fashion. I'm not sure if anons want them since we're trying the whole "give Tesah her thread back thing" but the take away is:
>Pointing out his selfposting made him sperg into defensive mode>Tries to rewrite the narrative as le epic troll>Following obviously sick of all his constant sperg outs>Omg sorry guys I'm actually not obsessed with LC and rising above I love you!>Sends self LC related ask to have an excuse to press his innocence further>I only responded constantly because there was a whole message board dedicated to me and now I know it's just what comes with being famous uwu
Even when "apologetic" he can't seperate himself from his delusions of grandeur kek.
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Flags redder than China's
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Kek he called someone out and then deleted it. Thankfully I managed to get a screenshot. Rasha is by no means my favourite person, but what a trash way to lose your job.
Her reputation in all the strip places has gone to shit because she keeps accusing people and management of harassment. She's damaged goods.
Get a different fucking job, you absolute airhead.
Enlighten us on how much stress she's under…Since you seem to know her so well.
50 onlyfans subscribers means nothing if you're constantly reducing/discounting how much you're charging kek also most of us have real jobs; defending your swollen vagina and frankentits from your own neckbeard subscribers isn't a job anyone here would be jealous of. Try harder.
My point was that numbers mean nothing when you charge a pittance for a subscription.
Very cool, thanks for explaining how shit it apparently is to be an online whore, makes me wonder wtf anyone with two brain-cells would ever want to be one…And you think we'd be jealous of that? Fucking LOL! I guess if you're not smart or motivated enough to do anything worthwhile with you life…
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Also that still applies in civil court dumbass
It's funny that you deleted your own OnlyFans and won't make content with your alcoholic girlfriend anymore. Are you that self-conscious about shortcomings?
Hope you got your investment back on that sure thing of yours.
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I'm sure by now you realise everytime you come here to sperg you bump the thread. You're sending it to the first page of the board thus continuing the cycle of interest. It's either you're (both) really stupid, or intent on keeping us talking. I'm gonna go ahead and guess mostly the latter but I won't knock a combination of both kek.
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Soz for samefag but this aged like milk
>I'm rising above all that
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he sounds like an alt right scrote here
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Refer to this autistic sperg about being God if you want some mild entertainment >>1035321
The divine comparisons only makes his shortcomings even more evident kek. Maybe he should try something more within his league? I'm sure being a Gayfish is plenty glamourous, otherwise he wouldn't have gotten that epic
Southpark homage tattoo.
I’d just like to point out for the keks that roseart started sperging right after the Sid the Sloth comparison & in this here sperg he addresses everyone as ‘Sloth Aids’
It’s like when Chris Chan made personal callout videos while he was drunk calling his foes “naïve retarded bastards” when he’s admitted that those are insults that hurt him the most kek
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He's like a child parroting new words and phrases he sees here. Case in point.
“my homies who are big on youtube”
how much you wanna bet he reached out to some of the other cows on here? lmao. dudes such a clown.
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this is true, i rarely post on the thread but i am constantly checking this one and i always have to check his stories even though i don't want to!!! i…can't…look…away….gets uglier and uglier as time goes on though
kills me that this couple from 2005 got warped into 2020
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Ladies, I've found the answer to our question KEK
Omg anon my sides.
That dick looks like full on tissue necrosis. Gross & sad.
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tesah's real face. one of her nostrils is twice the size of the other.
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also theres this old pic of her, not too sure it was posted already but even so, it deserves to be seen again. her "good looks" is smoke and mirrors.
I've pointed out her nose in her 'natural' selfies before. She obviously, aside from the makeup, relies on filters and FaceTune.
Also she's admitted to coke use, while I've never seen that make someone's nostril bigger, look at the bump or enlargement on the same side of her nose. Cocaine will do that, it inflames and enlarges the "coke dominant" side i.e. the one you use most to snort with. Good luck to her as she gets older because she also has a septum piercing. All that combined is eventually gonna lead to nasal collapse.
at first I thought this was a nitpick but after checking the photo again… yikes. the insane and badly done face tats, the bolted on tits and a collapsed nose… she will be a real treat to look at by 35+.
also I am pretty sure she's not the best dancer either so maybe she should care about a career fast. one without contact with customers or people in general, of course.
Ot but I just realised the self aggrandising sperg exerts I quoted >>1036188
don't once use "your" correctly despite being written by a nearly 30 year old man kek.
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This has gotta be him talking about himself…
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Kek went to dudes profile and he’s real… a real dumbass for simping over coinyac alfredo
Bad news: You have a small penis even when you pump it.
Raleigh is pretty progressive in comparison to other parts of NC but I doubt anyone would want to be your friend now that when they search your name they'll find your self-posted dick pics and the embarrassing tirades of you and your equally useless druggie bitch with the uneven plastic surgery. The only people who are going to be associated with you are the learning disabled like >>1036395
because their well-meaning naivete prevents them from seeing the truth. You look like scum, anyone doing anything worthwhile with themselves isn't going to touch you and your retarded drama you've created for yourself.
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This guy really thinks he's so interesting doesn't he?
I don't understand why all these mid 20s idiots think it's like some badge of honor to constantly delete their pages and recreate them too? Is that like a new trend or something? You'd think with being so obsessed with having followers you'd stop deleting your pages
It's probably less to do with thinking he's so great, and more like he's trying to cover tracks and ditch the papertrail of receipts per >>1036415
mention that his antics are showing up in Google searches. He's a controlling narc that likes to have a tight circle of kiss asses he can keep tabs on. Bet the drug use and free time from being unemployed don't help ease the paranoia either.
I love how he's inability to sage is basically the same as farmhands marking them.
I thought about posting his name and linking to his dick pics as reference for potential employers but let's be real: there's none. tesah and him truely are a match made at hot topic.(don't suggest cow tipping)
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Lmao he must hate being with her to get this tilted
I don't really know if, by your post, you're assuming I'm canyon, but I'm not. If you're not, though, I'm just a retard, kek.>>1036551
Don't feel bad. Canyon is doing this to himself.
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But dont you know that every woman's dying wish is to suck crayon's purple micro-peen.
Side note: I wonder if tesah's snatch is all sore and red looking because they've passed on something to eachother. Both their genitals look medically concerning.
>>1036461>I'll review every person who tries to add me
Translation: nobody gives a shit about my stale humor anymore so I'm pretending that I won't be accepting people to mask the fact that very few people are actually adding me.>but I don't care about numbers!
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i didn't give a fuck about these two but this guy coming in making the most unconvincing posts ever has me checking this thread just for it. i'm fucking rolling, my sides are in orbit, i can't believe he came back to post a second pumped pic of his shrimp chip jfc
saged for OT but some people delete/remake regularly to avoid stalkers or getting canceled. A lot of grooming scrotes do this but so do abuse survivors.
Makes me wonder if Mikey is pulling an Onion
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I've been popping in this thread once in a while to catch up on this tire fire train wreck of a relationship and I'm not even on here for 10 seconds and I see a fucking purple mini mushroom clogging up my screen. That penis looks like it needs to be checked by a DOCTOR… I'm am rolling at the fact this douche keeps commenting on this thread trying to uhhh troll us? Nice try you absolute fucking walnut. You look desperate for attention and just deranged… Like who posts a pic like that. If I was suffering from some sort of std I wouldn't plaster it on the fucking internet. Kek
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The narcsessistic Saint act continues and somehow gets even cringier to read. This is the type of thing a teenage tumblrite would make up for asspats but the plot thickens, because it's actually a deranged 30 year old man wearing a zoomer's skin.
Also pic related, he's big tilted his posts got marked. This is the most twitterfag attempt at being funny, they might as well have hired him for the emoji movie.
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Trying to look cute while yawning lmao
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Whoever said this up above was spot on. Tesah = Dahavie confirmed?
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AHHHH WTF CRAYON. It's so angry, gwt that shit checked out asap. I haven't checked this thread in days and this is what I am so unblessed to see? God, my poor eyes. This walnut is something else. How could he possibly think this is hot? Lay off the penis pump… oh wait… but then it would be non existent. Must suck to suck.
"Oh Hi Mark"…
For real though Crayon, how is posting a pic of your own gross dick in here "baiting" anybody?? You're really slow aren't you?
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Chile, anyways, so
Here's Tesah realizing she has no friends (at least not locally)
Depends where you live; American IG hasn't implemented it yet>>1036858
This is why you never attach your real name to sex work retard
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we go apeshit laughing bc it's the funniest shit to happen on this board in a minute, not because we're 'being trolled' lmao>>1036891
why are you so desperate to get us to stop talking about him, huh? almost like you have some investment in shutting this down now that ravine is getting clowned and his posts marked…
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Since you read this tesah here’s your boyfriend telling me how he was gonna get your account deleted and guess what it did get deleted. No icon cause he’s since deleted this account. I’ve known tesah since I was 16, He told my sock puppet account he was going to delete her shit while he was simping for sympathy.
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This is gonna end in someone going to jail
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>>1036917>in this chat
damn i'm so mad about the hi cow rule rn. imagine being so desperate for attention that you willingly become a court jester
You sound like either a whiteknight or Canyon himself, due to lack of ability to Sage and the fact that you type like the samefagging retard that got banned earlier.
I completely believe that Canyon would try to delete Tesah's account, he's a jealous prick that can't stand when the attention isn't on him. The thread seemed to light up when anon posted the screenshot.
Do you have an iPhone? If you take a screen recording, then you can shorten it easily.
Find the video in Photos, click on “Edit” in the top right corner, and then drag the arrows at the bottom to adjust the video length (then save it, obviously). You should be able to eliminate the part that shows your inbox.
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Looks like he’s sperging out on the board too very clearly the screenshot has him bothered
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Confirmed. You know they lurk
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So if canyon has never messaged my sock puppet… how do I have the screenshot of a text he screenshotted to me with ur Number? The number could be a fake cause he was saying she was using fake numbers but I’ve covered the number just Incase it is her real one (don’t want to dox her) from their fight in jan when she brought that other dude over
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Should probably learn the definition of defamation first Ravine
> the action of damaging the good reputation of someone
Emphasis on the GOOD
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Crayon, you have to have at least some intellectual capacity to bait effectively. Until then I'll continue to kek at whatever pathetic attempt you come up with. It's only funny because it's like watching a Facebook boomer with the grandiose notion they're ~le epic troll~ whilst simultaneously ruining their public image for specs of attention.Also, it's "niche" (pronounced neesh) you brain-dead burgerfag>>1036855>Chile
Back to Twitter you go
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Holy fuck I'm dying. Does this retard really think he's the first person to try and sue LC? The only things we discuss are the ammunition he provided. It's not defamation if we aren't falsifying your character. Kek, not even taking that into account, he doesn't have a leg to stand on.
Who cares about her anon, she'll eventually come around when they have a fight or something. Deep down she knows it's true. Personally, you've peaked my interest and I want to kek at how pathetic Crevasse is. He's already tried to make the thread feel sorry for him whilst shit talking Tesah anonymously so it's more than in character. I say post it so we can watch the "WKs" squirm to find anything to disprove it.
Btw you can also convert the file to "webm" online and then upload it here directly.
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I am fucking HOWLING. I don't think I've ever laughed this hard at a cow post on a thread before, the fact that he fucking days he'll sue for adsense when this board doesn't even have ads has me screeching. The fact that he even thinks
he has a case when we've only been making fun of the posts Canyon fucking made
, and the fact that he's been heavily interacting with this fucking board and had himself said he's been "trolling" us has sent my sides to another realm. I love this thread
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Terrible attempt at backtracking when you realise how idiotic you sound. If it was really a case of "trolling" then he wouldn't have deleted >>1037244
this. Oh man he must be freaking out right now, that screenshot about him getting Tesahs account taken down is damning.
"Its ya boy, the pedo rapist of fb"
What an idiot
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Kek! 'they post the most homophobic and racist stuff's um since when? Someone's reaching now cuz his little purple crayon is hurting
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Lmao look at the floor and the arm
Omg the fake legal notice sent to the site was so fucking hilarious. Fingers crossed Crayola does something that's equally as retarded.>>1037452
The best part is the milk used to be a dry, practically nonexistent. Then Ravine went on a spergfest in the original thread trying to persuade anons his penis is big. When that failed he posted it himself pretending to be someone else. The milk has be flowing ever since.
If by “buzz buzz out of our bee hive” you mean “fall out laughing”, then you’re damn right darlin’. Do you have any idea how many Cows have threatened lolsuits? I don’t even know, but it’s been lots. But I CAN tell you how many have been successful.
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I can't think of anything more romantic than my bf calling me a boot licker
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If the boot fits…
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Samefagging to post this pic. All pics of purple crayon are gone on Tesah's IG
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The anon you replied to posted and deleted this. Pretty obsessed to post and then delete when called out for it
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i'd put money down that he tried to delete the dick pics, realized he couldnt, then panicked and went to this as his solution. it's amazing to watch him evolve so quick, he's already on the vicky shingles stage. what's next, a pivot to lilee for a cyberbullying victim
saga? or onision for a truly reprehensibly disgusting only fans saga? >>1037651
can you imagine the meltdown if the farms truly caused their next breakup? i'm salivating
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Thinking he cracked the code by posting somebody's sock.
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I don't think she wants the help, anon.
no, see, you dont understand her contrarian type. the more she's told he's a loser, the more she's going to double down with shit like >>1037747
and insist he's everything he selfposts on lolcow about. i'd wager that her whole current life came from choosing to steadfastly pursue the red flags she's warned about just to prove that it'll be different for her/she's special for it somehow. both of them have terminal attention-seeking disease, she'll stay with him until it gets her more attention not to.
She won't. They're both terrible, low key unattractive, and just shitty enough that there's really no one else out there that would want to be with them.
I mean, Tesah has to photoshop herself and paint makeup on her face just to be passable, see >>1036057
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I can absolutely picture Canyon pulling a Patrick Bateman while he has sex.
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It's either he thinks he's a "troll god" or a "troll Bob", I can't decide which kek.
This is so cringey, imagine being over the age of 11 and calling yourself a "troll god"
Also laughing so hard because I had no idea he only had 5,220 followers. I thought he had around 20k ik r something, not that that's remarkable either, but oh my god that's hilarious
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Looks and acts like Dan the Meme Man's "I'm a clout god" shit
He really is the living embodiment of >I was just pretending to be retarded!!
It's obvious he's embarrassed and doubling down to save face. It's gotta sting to see a whole board of girls laughing at his little dick and exposing his selfposting, and the way he threatened legal action then pretended to be trolling when he realized nobody was concerned was just the icing on the cake. It's been hilarious, I'm yet another anon who never paid attention to this thread until he started sperging.
No I dont remember somebody who I've never heard of, sorry? I dont know this guy's history but all I know is that currently that's how many followers/friends he has. And those numbers are pathetic. Couldn't give a flying fuck about how many he "used" to have…
Also I don't believe you kek
9gag? Oh boy you must be someone special to be posted on 9gag!
If you had an organic following of 200k, you would still have 200k fans. This just tells me that only 2% of those were real.
No idea what you were "famous" for but I'm sure it's hard for you to stay memorable when you're a do nothing slob and there's a flood of new eboys that look just like you doing interesting things with their lives.
I mean, really. What is it that you do? You don't do art or music, you have no special talent. You aren't really attractive. You don't shower. There's nothing of interest going on with you. You have bad tattoos and a psycho girlfriend. Jimbo down at the trailer park has the same appeal.
You do realize the entire premise of this site (that by the way has hundreds of other threads that aren't for Crayon) is to mock and laugh at people like Crayon and Tesah? Like you get that right? The milk is entertainment. These idiots who are so desperate to be interesting and "famous
" and they just fall flat on their faces because they're retarded. The self created drama is amazing too. Nobody is here talking about their either of them because we actually like them, it's because they're drama is like watching a train wreck happen in real time
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I know this is bait but “a simple google search” only comes up with images from these threads and obvious self-posts like pic related.
Also your home address, which is interesting. Why does half your family spell their name Monfredo and the other half Monfrado? Is your whole family retarded too?
Damn dude you can't even make something up? I asked you what it is that you do successfully. Just curious what it is you think you should be famous for. Is it this >>975783
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Only Gulch simps for Gulch so there's something wrong your statement and I think I know what it is KEK
Also >Thread goes quite for a few hours>Suspicious flood of low IQ energy posts>Anons have a jolly good kek>Rinse and repeat
The predictable milk flow here is delicious. Here's a hilarious cap from his insta describing the deeply meaningful tattoos he vandalised his face with. I am in awe of his intellect.>>1037947
Wtf anon I swear this is repost but it says "6h". Is the autist trying to go viral with this pathetic heart of gold copypasta because I've read this exact story before, word for word?
Samefagging but yeah googling him proved nothing to me. A YouTube account with one retarded video with low views came up, alongside some shitty "modeling" photos and then as you say, just shit here or screencaps from Reddit.
The only interesting thing I found was that he also showed up inna Vicky Shingles thread 2 years ago because I guess she was trying to get a piece of his purple dick at one point kek
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Holy fuck, I just found the cow crossover we never knew we had. We weren't the first anons to make the Vicky Shingles comparison, and I doubt we'll be the last kek. This is my new favourite ship.
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sorry for samefag too, I should have read your post. I guess you beat me to it kek. And I mean he recently reposted that exact same story on Instagram, like literally this week not even joking.
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HAHA what a twist!! now we know how low his standards really are, lmaooo. >>1037986
of course it's him selfposting, this is the most attention from a group of women he's gotten in his whole life
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Why do all these shit, pointless stories keep ending up in the thread…
I have my suspicions.
Also I hope Vicky reads this thread and realises that her and Crayon should can finally be together. They're perfect for eachother. Rasha who?
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Forgot to photoshop your waist again Plank. If ur gonna shop at least be consistent and decent at it you fucking twat.
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Since we're talking about shoop-jobs…Look at this disaster. What size do you want your waist to look, Tesah, make up your mind!
This thread is gold and I love it. >>1037971
I love the fact that Canyon is so uncreative he steals well-known copypastas, makes a few tiny changes and then posts them as if they were his own.
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This chick does herself no favours going au natural. It's cute when actual attractive people do it, it's just jarring otherwise.
Wait. He dated Morgan Joyce??
What actually happened? I didn't see that in the other thread if it's in there.
Never heard anything about that.. Plz spill.
So when the next trashy e-girl comes around with even more tattoos and shittier photoshopping then he'll be moving on? My guess for the next victim
is Sophii Saturn because he so clearly has a thing for her, and she's thinner and more tatted than Tesah.
Seems to me like he's social climbing. Once he's sucked the life out of whoever (that includes their following), he moves onto the next victim
with a sob story about his aboose.
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A Google search of Morgan Joyce and Canyon Monfrado brought this up.
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Did some digging and found Canyons tiny crayon.
This is real, I remember it myself when I followed his old account! His boomerang glitched and you could see his cock and balls. So I can confirm this is 100% real.
Also he needs to clean that mirror fucking gross
Yes I know that, but it was so quick in the boomerang that it obviously didnt detect it. I don't know why you're getting so defensive, but I can confirm that I did see this post on his old account and you got a split-second view of his bee-sting.
>every picture of crayons dick is shaved and purple
Well I don't know about you but I've only seen the two from the threads kek
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This is not that lol
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Maybe he doesn't know what an erection is because his bee-sting isn't big enough
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>>1038465>>1038467>Bigger than all you losers
Your lack of intelligence is showing, again. Firstly, that's not hard since we're women
. Secondly be less transparent, you've got to give us more of a challenge here. Thirdly, put your penis pumped baby carrot away. It looks like it's about to fall off.
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Sure thing kek
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Says the chud who has no content whatsoever…
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Cumrag when is his caught redhanded selfposting
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>>1038484>Omg can y'all stop defending me on these threads>Canyon self-posting
MY FUCKING SIDES
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What are you talking about anon, no content? What about these zingers? Some of them are close to 40 whole likes!! Kek
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Social media culture for sure. Social media fuels the narcissism as "self love", whilst also condoning the car crash that is their existence in the form of attention, and ass pats for their "twauma". They're the kind of people who would've got their 5 minutes of fame on Jerry Springer in the 90s and then faded into irrelevancy. Now everyday is a low budget sequel as they chase that dopamine hit like a hamster on a wheel.
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Look at these levels of irrelevance- all he does all day is post in Facebook groups for shreads of attention…Unsuccessfully I might add. People find this type of humor so outdated and unfunny. Change it up a bit if you want to be funny, Canyon! For your own good!
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>>1038556>People say me and Robert Patingson look identical>Patingson>1 like
The rest are 2006-tier normie jokes with a little twitterfag thrown in, the absolute state of this man KEK.
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Excuse me Chode where the fuck is this juiciness in other groups. Don't be fucking shy now you ass hat show us then since you wanna brag so much. kek. We see your irrelevance all over Facebook. You're a fraud. You Super Weenie Hut Jr. looking ass.
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This is the "juicy" group he's talking about. Just a mixture of people who wanna play with his chode. And people who find him insufferable. The memes are cringe as fuck. Someone cowtipped in this group previously but no real milk in there just some cringy ass pathetic memes.
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Saged for possibly not milk but DAE notice that Tesah deleted all her old pictures as a blonde?
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Both of them posting baby emojis in their stories to try and pretend/give off the idea that Tesah is pregnant or some shit.
Took the bait just to point out he posted about her period this morning.
Unless he was talking about the other women he's currently fucking, in that case don't mind me.
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@crayon …. would a site for men really have this as a topic/thread? it's literally called "The Pink Pill (Man-Hate #22). NUMBER TWENTY TWO!!!!
22 threads all dedicated for hating on pathetic men. a lot of the women here hate men. men are also banned on site. even fags! i've seen it happen a few times.
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samefag but i want to make it very clear to this idiot that this an IMAGEBOARD (not chat, you absolute retard) for women & women only.
you'll notice at the top of the site a link simply called "g". this stands for "girl talk". you know; hair, makeup, what dudes you find hot, ideal penis size…. things like that.
its undeniable that this site is for woman and it speaks to your overblown ego that you just cannot accept that, because in your mind every single woman is swooning over you and all the men are jealous. sorry to burst your bubble, but you need to humble yourself. there is a large portion of the female population who'd only need to take one look at you to come to the conclusion that you're a scumbag.
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And I fucking keked again, Crevasse is on a role.
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LoL So EdGy EkS DeE
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gulch do you know that it's not 2007, no one's impressed by your edgy fb memes and tiny purple weiner. why do weak bitch boys like this have so much unearned confidence? i guess no one bullied him until it was too late
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I almost feel like she’s trolling sharing this pic of him he actually looks like he has Down syndrome??? Wonder what the sticker was covering
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>>1039496>If you don't have a dark twisted sense of humour, don't add me. Because I don't want to know you.>>1039618
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The ship is beginning to sail kek
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Sorry I'm an idiot and accidentally deleted the screenshot
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You're right, anon.
C'mon girls, let's just delete this thread because we're mean to repost all the milky stuff they post/crayon coming into the thread and post his penis(?). Anon is okay with the rest of the cows though.
Tesah has been posting for months about wanting a girlfriend, although I imagine it's like a teenager just wanting more attention from boys for being "bi" and isn't actually at all. Who knows though. Maybe this will be their new schtick kek
(In reality Tesah's probably been throwing a shit fit since Vicky popped up in here and this was crayons way to get her to calm her frankentits while also reigniting conversation with Vicky)
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Ignoring the typical moral saviour crap he pulls in nearly every story, I'm interested in the fact he still hasn't learnt the difference between "your" and "you're". Just imagine the level of disadvantage of his and Tesah's theoretical offspring.
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Have any of u seen (or heard) tesahs soundcloud lol
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Good god the related pictures for soundcloud
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When you go to her actual soundcloud profile, this is the picture that it shows, and then of course right underneath that is a shitty botdf song kek
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Please tell me this cow didn't share her toothbrush with the cat
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Just when you thought Gulch couldn't get any douchier, he starts sporting a twat knot kek
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Take away the filters and photoshop and this is what you're left with
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What the actual ever living fuck is this autism? Murdered my pussy? I'm fucking dead. God, imagine being so low tier that you'd let his tiny purple mushroom within ten feet of you.
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Is that a fucking Hitachi wand?!?
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His new schtick is being a 30 year old man larping as a teenage Zoomer who's larping as 2008 millennial.
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I just realised I don't see his fatloss posting here anywhere. What's the bet anons are the reason he's been feeling self conscious?
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They look so coked out here. That could attribute to crayons sudden weight loss
Wtf is wrong with her nose? >>1041112
also fat loss where? Very easy to hide it when you're laying down and even then it's so obvious how much of a soft body he has. You ain't foolin' no-one, Crayon!
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From Tesah's Facebook, comment on that most recent pic of her and crayon looking cracked out kek
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I'm dying, Rasha's mutuals are savage.
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Typical horde scum. Regardless of what faction made it, they're certainly a bunch of fags, and it's probably on retail kek.
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Is it me or is the floor warped behind her
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Uh yeah sure… kek
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Every time he starts a new FB he gets big again and again
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>it's another canyon self-posting episode
This shit's getting old. Mod's need to tag canyon's posts, and canyon needs to up his game by bringing Tesah in, so we can get an in-thread real time slapfight about all the shit he's talked while claiming it was "muh haterz". Now that'd be funny as fuck.
I freaking love the mods and jannis on this board, kek
I really hope the mods redtext all of Canyon and Tesah's posts. It's about time, and we all know they're not going to stop posting
My dog gets more likes and doesn't have to act like a sperg to get them
Also it's pretty obvious that the self posting starts again when he's away from Tesah. She should sit her man child down and explain that his behaviour isn't acceptable just because he's alone.
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Kek he's got like 5 stories dedicated to this pic on IG saying he found it and calling himself a Karen. Now he's stealing our posts and insults
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Please post this one on your stories next, Crayon!
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Vicky attempting to defend Canyons microdick is everything…And no sign of Tesah standing up for him? Guess we know who the favourite is.
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His content is so dry he's claiming shit posted on this thread. Holy shit this is the saddest thing I've ever witnessed… And obviously Rasha is nowhere near creative enough to make this kek.
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Samefag but we finally broke him
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Imagine he goes "viral" using lolcow content
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>>1042932>2011 virgin can't break the law without getting caught. Karan af. 20 lbs underweight. Small dick. Vs 2020 Chad. Can break the law without getting caught. Still small dick though.
If it was anyone else I'd be genuinely surprised this wasn't written by a 14 year old, but because it's Crayola his stupidity does doesn't phase me anymore. Kek at how he only managed to get the last part right.
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Someone had to pop in because of the Vicky Shingles chatter from here kek
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Canyon shilling for twitterfag "politics" again because it's mainstream. Being irrelevant, he's gotta get that clout somehow. Everyone in that photo looks extremely lame (I only know of Milo and dude's a creep), but what's equally lame is the retarded laugh sperg laced with an overabundance of emojis. I am embarrassed he felt the need to post this but not surprised.
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Going back to stripping and drinking every night. This can't end well
I think he thinks that the thread has gone too quiet and he's bumping it for more "attention"
Crayon get off your ass and do some fucking work, then maybe your gf might not have to return to the brothels. Also you might actually be able to afford nice things like furniture and decent clothing! Wouldn't that be better than acting like a child on an insignificant forum? You could be a real, functioning adult male- not just an embarrassment to everyone who knows you.
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haha get a job.
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Well now we know why he was sperging about an anime filter. Wanted to look less like a tweaker
It must be so shit for Tesah to be in such a one-sided relationship, whoring herself out and paying for everything. Meanwhile her bf is doing…This? Making a show of them online? It would almost
make me feel bad for her.
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So was Tesah's "new stripping job" her going live on OF for 10 minutes last night? It seems that's what she spent all day getting ready for kek
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Translation: Crayon has become too insecure to post his teenie weenie online for everyone to laugh at
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A previous anon deleted evidence of the virus, but we have a duty to inform the public before it becomes a serious health hazard. 1 like = 1 prayer for Tesah.
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Samefag, forgot the ss
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That's not even what the show does kek WHAT
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What even is all of this nonsense? Suing? Catfish?
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You're not the first person to try this Roseart. Maybe you should ask your friend Vicky.
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The comments stopped?? So funny that he thinks he's got an admin to lolcow in his cross hairs from a fake profile kek
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I'm sure admin-chan is shaking in her boots.
Much like onision, Crayon is praying that someone with social media relevance (no offense anon) has interest in him. That's why he's claiming admin… because anyone would be better than us lowly peasants.
Dream big, Crayon, dream big!
"10 of my followers are sharing that voice clip" oh wow, all… 10 you say?
Well anons we can rest assured this site does bother him, clearly. The funniest part of all his shenanigans is him thinking he has this website all figured out too… Yes crayon there's only one mastermind admin here and her whole sole life's mission is to make fun of you by posting content you've made public yourself
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This is bordering on Shay-tier cringe
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It looks like he’s archived all his posts and deleted his stories. Good.
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Kek, what a retard.
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Those were truely magical times anon
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Nvm, I was right
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And so it begins… again
I wish I got more ss's but for realllll. It's probably him doing all of this just for more attention. It's so hilarious.>>1044358
Agreed. He deleted his content, ans Tesah completely deleted her profile. We all know that won't last long though.
His body is so flabby. Not an ounce of muscle. You can tell he puts in zero effort. Looks like he can't even lift a gallon of milk. If he got a job, he would be in better shape.
He's pussy repellent.
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Following a bunch of retarded lip syncing over two stories to a song about "saying shit to my face and I'll kick your butt" Crayon posted this.
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Samefag because I meant to attach this photo
Holy fuck same here. Huge oof
. But anon, it literally says in the rules to just copy and delete and then repost.
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Why would anyone cover this KEK? I can't think of a single benefit except for if she wanted to seem "so random XD"?
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She's baaaack… Can't make them dolla dolla bills without a platform to pimp herself on
Lmao how would they break up anyway? First of all, they rent together. Their living space looks like any other 'luxury' apartment rental in Raleigh, and it seems like neither of them have employment stable enough to support a place independently for themselves. If Crayon buys a new toy, then doubly so. He's so torn up about her sex work but knows that's the only way the useless bitch can make any income otherwise.
Tesah ain't gonna leave his ass until she secures another cuck bf who suits her aesthetic and doesn't care about her sex work. Not to mention she couldn't get her own place because OF isn't proof of income and neither is stripping.
Losers. Imagine exaggerating a fake breakup for attention as if they wouldn't be at each other's throats when that's their typical default.
When they're civil, they're bullshitting.
You raise some excellent points, anon. I didn't think about how a breakup isn't even feasible in their current living situation. They're both so toxic
but literally can't even leave each other because they'd both be fucked.
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thank you! I thought she was 23. anyways, here’s a comparison pic
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spoilered as requested.
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Ravine has a new video up (top screenshot) about how he can't reply to all the messages he gets because he has arthritis in his hands and can't type that much… I guess he forgot about these recent posts. Dude spergs novels on the regular and then uses this as an excuse not to reply to "his fans". Clearly just an attempt to show off how many people message him. The desperation reaks.
The way he keeps breaking up with her, posting about being single and then getting back with Tesah must be such a mindfuck for her. No wonder the girl is a mess, she doesn't know where she stands because Crayon is too fucking braindead to ever make his mind up.
Their relationship seems like they're constantly walking on eggshells around eachother.
It'd legitimately hate to be them; their lives/relationship seems dull but so exhausting.
I hate using this word, but Crayon is toxic
to his core and I completely agree that he's ruined Tesah's life. She's completely in denial about how much of a garbage boyfriend/person he is.
Than you clearly haven’t seen the breakdown videos and screenshot texts between them both. Might need to do more research retard. Crayon is toxic
but tesah is the final boss of toxic
Calm down, there's no need for name-calling.
You can think what you want, I couldn't give the slightest fuck. I've been here since the garbagecore tesah/Fallon days and I've seen all the evidence. In my eyes Crayon is far more malicious and vitriolic.
Sorry if my opinion pisses you off (I'm not sorry at all kek)
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He really does just live rent free on this board
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Tesah posted this video last night. Looks like she started her new stripping job and crayon went nuts
Actually if u followed tesah prior to crayon she worked in the same bar always. When canyon started dating her they would usually have terrible fights every time she worked, she then asked the manager if she could just work on the bar I believe judging by the text screenshot shared of her saying she’d work in the bar if crayon came back, they had a fight after that anyway and then she quit and then crayon posted that her bar was toxic
which I think was just him trying to make it look like he saved her rather than made her quit her job >>1044694
Tbh I honestly think filming someone with mental illness having a break down and posting it online as proof of their character is even more toxic
lmao like she wasn’t some Karen freaking out in a Walmart she was his gf and he shouldn’t have done that??
She lied to the police and the internet about him hitting her and posted their personal conversations online BEFORE he posted those videos. He tried to get out before but cucked himself back in. She would threaten suicide every time he tried to leave. You say you been here a while but you forgot all the key points on this toxic
relationship and your simping for trasha isn’t going to fly here. Admins ban
No I agree Canyon is an attention seeking scumbag but every time he posted about her it was responding to her attacks on him via social media. He just won each one because he had actual evidence. Do I think canyon is also to blame yes. They are both toxic
beyond understanding and I’ll leave it at that
-It's obviously more than one person saying they feel (sort of) bad for Tesah.
-Calling for bans because you disagree with some of the points being made is retarded.
-nobody is simping, everyone has agreed that Tesah is garbage but some anons think Crayon is worse.
-learn to Sage when you don't have milk.
Tinfoil: He posted his own doxx.
Who would even have his address anyway? They don't have friends lmao.
>>1044803>y'all >internet personality
Because it's fun. Making fun of people who act like retards online is fun…Even more so when it's in a group.
You don't know how many people are on this board and how often they post so calling people obsessed is pointless.
If Crayon would stop spamming the thread then it wouldn't get bumped and then the thread wouldnt get much attention at all…
But he couldn't possibly let that happen.
>>1044803>muh white knight discourse
Fuck off. But also.>Internet personality
Kek, they wished they were as relevant as that label makes them think they are.
But again, fuck off.
I thought you guys were exaggerating but that is pathetically small oh my lord
btw newish to the thread
He had to have, honestly. Imagine doxxing a cow and coming back to say >>1044665
If I was that stupid I would just not say anything. Because this is an anonymous board and I wouldn’t have to fess up unless I wanted the attention… which sounds kind of familiar
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Samefag but look what pic is now visible again on Tesah's profile… You know why there was no Cops level blowout with this "breakup" anons? Because it never happened kek
1) hope you don't have a headache from stringing together these full sentences
2) you yourself are assimilating some image board culture - "autist"
3) it's always entertaining how your word use is just a bit off like a big brain high school dropout - "delayed"
4) you are such a dumbass, "sage" and "samefag" were around on boards far before the dawn of lolcow. noone here made them up. they are necessary on image boards, specific vocabulary to describe the saging action or a repeat poster.
5) hate to break it to you but dating a stripper, getting in public domestic violence disputes, posting your dick online, and pining for attention from crusty facebook groups makes you the degenerate here
>>1045450>>1045467> hope you don't have a headache from stringing together these full sentences>punched lasagna
I'm losing my fucking mind, I love the anons itt>>1045431
I mean, it's not lingo we made up, it's a necessary action being used on imageboards since the dawn of autism. I would figure since you hate this thread so much you would make every attempt possible to keep it from being bumped, including, you know…………saging. That's just me an my delayed autist brain though.
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If you're going to dox yourself again but this time whilst on the move, let us know when you travel through the
G r a n d C a n y o n
Lasagnanon here, glad u liked that lol. No disrespect to lasagna, even if its sloppy it doesnt deserve to be compared to Messah. I apologize to that tasty dish.
Honestly tho why do they bother coming here? Are they just trying to make people annoyed and alog them so they can cry victim
/call the cyber police? Or is any attention good attention? Maybe it's a weird way of using his cuckold fetish? The fuck are they trying to prove other than them being spare fucking parts? Spergs never make sense but goddamn.
He knows, it's obviously on purpose because this is the only place he gets a scrap of attention. His facebook and Instagram posts are all bombing, I'm honestly embarrassed for him.
What's the point when he can't make money from it? That's why he was always attempting to go viral elsewhere. I can see the point when cash was involved but now it's weird and sad. He can't handle his growing irrelevance so he bumps the board to make himself feel more important.
It's ok, Crayon, at least you've got your…Health?
>>1045570>He knows, it's obviously on purpose because this is the only place he gets a scrap of attention.
Can't we just ignore his obvious posts and just shit talk him to each other. Don't give his flabby ass any air.