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2021 will be your sucker
As an added note, don't infight ITT. It's one thing to comment on an anon's post, but it's another to try and start infighting with an anon by replying with a snarky response (ex. "what did you expect to happen anon?")
just let anon vent, if you want to be a nitpicky bitch head over to /pt/ or /snow/. no1currs about your shitty input.
previous thread: >>>/ot/695462
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I grew up isolated by overly religious parents. They "homeschooled" us. But they dropped the ball on schooling us, so we basically just did fuck all all day as kids. Had hardly any friends and the friends I did have (minus one) were manipulative assholes who gaslit the fuck out of me. Had to get my GED at 19. Tried going to college but couldn't get funding and failed most of the classes I was in and didn't know what I wanted to do anyway. Got an extremely lowpaying wageslave job that was also "union" (in spite of that we were still treated like cow shit and they took "union fees" out of our paychecks).
I also live somewhere far north/west which has a pretty small population. All anyone cares about here is either religion, hunting/fishing, smoking weed or a combination of those. Living in a small city makes me feel even more isolated. I really want to move to a different city, maybe even country, but I don't have the money and I honestly don't know if that would even help.
I have symptoms of different personality disorders like BPD, NPD and most of schizotypal PD. I find it really hard to make friends because I have nothing in common with anyone, and I'm really paranoid that everyone hates me. The more close I get to people, the more paranoid I am. I was severely depressed as a teen and an adult, but my sister was even more depressed than me and would act out (as in throw adult tantrums and kick/punch the walls) which took attention away from me. I begged my mom to get me a therapist at 17, but she never got me one until I was 25 and I just turned 26 which means I got kicked off of their insurance and can no longer go to therapy unless I pay for it. I briefly had a boyfriend but he turned out to be a porn addicted weeb who was in a circle of friends who were porn addicted weebs and they had a group chat where they'd share lolicon.
I'm pretty sure I'm retarded, too. I take things literally and have trouble understanding simple things. Ideally I would go back to college, but it's fucking expensive, and I've failed most of the classes I've taken because, well, I'm retarded. On top of that I don't even know what to do. My passion is linguistics but I've heard it's hard to make a career out of that.
I've been a NEET most of my life. I'm working now and I make roughly 2k a month, still not enough to live on here. I want to move out so bad because I'm so fucking sick of living with my parents. But I don't know how to make enough money. I'm in vocational school right now for medical billing and coding, but it's still going to be 10 months before I'm going to be able to get a job in that field.
I have so many things I wish I could do if I had friends. Like, I really want to get into table top gaming like DnD… but I have no idea how to meet people who are into that. I'm also afraid because it seems like gaming communities are full of guys like my ex and I don't want to fuck with that.
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PLEASE SOMEONE COMFORT ME.
I feel so sick right now. Today I confided to my mom about my ex being a manipulative pathological liar. I told her to not contact his family and she said she wouldn't. The SAME DAY, I get a long apology text from him. This wasn't a coincidence and she obviously reached out to him or his family. I seriously feel fucking nauseous.
I don't know why I even bothered trusting her after he repeated violations of my privacy in the past. I feel so fucking angry, sick, and regretful right now. Fuck my life.
male subs cope with their low status by turning it into a fetish would be my guess
But it's something I've observed as well, my less-than-sexy friends seem to be more openly kinky, meanwhile the attractive ones are "vanilla". It's kind of funny because the kinksters bitterly shit on the hotties whenever the subject comes up, "ugh it's such a waste! You could have whatever you want but you're a boring normie cishet!" as if they could shame them into degeneracy.
I posted a question about trooning out friends in the stupid questions thread but will turn it into a vent instead: >>703240>>703241>>703243>>703363
My thing is kinda weird, we have a few mutual friends, one of them is very close to me and this dude was pretty close to me up till shit happened with my and a few other friends health that made us too tired of his constant sad boy posting. He is a insightful dude with an actual brain but he is just like any other depressed scrote and thinks he has it the worst and can't seem to understand that therapy is pretty easily obtainable for him and would help, especially if he were to move. We used to bond over shit parents but after my dad died, in a pretty tragic way mind you, he never said anything, it almost seemed like he was jealous. He has a past of trying to talk sexually in the middle of deep convo, usually disguised as "these are the experiences guys go through" and it's icky and gross, especially because he has a gf who he never fucking opens up to. He has also jokingly bodyshamed the gf online in a reply to me, knowing she follows me and can see it. This dude is a teacher. Morbid curiousity tells me to keep him around but i will be careful not to give him any clothing or makeup advice, i had to learn that shit on my own too.
hell, that describes my own relationship with kink/sex perfectly
whenever i have very bad body image episodes i hook up with guys who will beat me and insult my appearance during sex but on a decent body image day my sexual desires are pretty normal
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So I’ve been talking to this guy for a while as friends we ended up liking each other.
After meeting for a weekend and deciding we still wanted to pursue things romantically.
During planning me going to his town I mentioned being interested in a place close to it that he didn’t know about and even sent him a video about it, I was super exited as I had seen photos of it before and specifically said “I don’t mind what we do but I’d love to go here and maybe this restaurant during my stay”
Cut to a few weeks ago trip is cancelled due to COVID and we continue talking as often as we did before.
The day that I’m supposed to arrive he sent me photos of the place and said he got me something from the place, instead of waiting to go with me.
Once I said that I was hurt by his decision of not waiting for me his response was asking me if he couldn’t go places without me.
What the fuck
welp, maybe I can just blame the drugs then
and steal and flush them down the toilet, not like she can remember anything anyway
Nah I'm kind of just into lighter bdsm, not like nipple clasping upside down with hooks while someone motorboats my chest wearing a latex mask thing. While I want my boundaries pushed a bit, I don't want to go too far.
I honestly think I just want someone as a dom giving it to me rough as a coping mechanism after being in a relationship where I got continuously raped a few years ago. So with bdsm no matter how rough my partner is I have the power to say "no" or "stop" and having a partner that would actually respect those boundaries.
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Posted in the old thread cuz i'm a dumbass.
I can't complain about this irl because I don't wanna be ungrateful but ughhh. I lost my job because of the pandemic and so did my mum, so her, my brother and I are going to move into my grandma's house because it's empty.
It only has two bedrooms, and we planned to make another one for me using space from the living room. Now she wants to just divide one of the two bedrooms which are very small and make two fucking cubicles for me and my brother because she doesn't want to lose living room space to decor.
I will have basically no privacy and no space to put most of my shit so I'll just probably have to somehow find another job and move out in like 2-3 months which is so stressful since I have no job and no one to live with. God, I hate this.
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>me, on december 23rd
>"Wow I have a four day weekend and so much time!"
>me, on december 27th
>"Wow I did fucking nothing except getting high, sleeping, and attending an awkward and unfun family dinner and already my last lolcow post was 2 hours ago this day will be over soon and tomorrow it's back to work."
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I really prefer when my drunkard uncle is in a depressive slope than when he’s manic and utterly annoying. I wish he could just die already or something, even though I shouldn’t but he only gets the family in trouble and worries everyone all of the time.
I'm so fucking sick being resented over the fact I had the "privilege" of having parents who aren't horrible and were half-way financially responsible. Like, I get so much misplaced contention over the fact I had certain leg ups, like help paying for college and being taught basic economic shit like investing in the stock market. It's not my fault their parents had three or four kids, despite working minimum wage jobs or barely any higher, and blew any potential savings on daily cigarettes, alcohol, scratch tickets, fast food, and whatever other white trash vices were more important than investing in their children's future.
Before anyone screams "classist"- I'm well aware that not every family is poor because of really bad choices and there are obviously countless scenarios outside of people's control. However, a lot of people are as bad off as they are because of bad choices, and the people who resent me for having a decent upbringing financially almost always come from backgrounds where their parents were just horrifically irresponsible.
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This is the second time I've written out a post and then backspaced it all because I feel like I was getting too thoughtful to the point of sentimentality and cringe.
Also if the posts weren't taken well that would have really hurt my feelings in an unironic way.
I know that feel, anon, it’s so fucking annoying how all people do is seethe when they see anyone having a decent life and making progress on their goals because of their retarded resentment, one can’t really have decent friends because of this shit, maybe one or two, because the moment you get to talk about something relatively high class whatever the fuck that means
they all get triggered
and start reeeeeeing about privilege and shit.
Why is it so difficult for them to just stop being so resentful? Just working on themselves and setting up goals to accomplish can help a lot with progressing in life.
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My sister's about to ruin her life and there's nothing I can do to stop it
>married a stable but controlling guy, got a divorce after trying to make it work, seemed to become far more mature while single and living alone
>hooked up with a single father of three kids and fell ~madly in love~
>guy is blue-collar good old boy (think cop) and seems nice but is dumb as rocks and has a drinking problem, believes in at least one easily-debunked conspiracy theory, sister says he's apolitical but I suspect that he's a Qtard or white nationalist or something similarly abhorrent
>moved in with him after like 4 or 5 months, is planning on eloping within the 7-month mark and is already house shopping and actively trying to get knocked up
>is engaging in risky behavior that puts her in danger and damages her health, new guy encourages it; she is encouraging his risky behavior in turn
>seems to have lost contact with old friend network, is now surrounded by local govt drones, cops, etc. who are likely encouraging her impulsive behavior and general mediocrity
>parents have not only given up on trying to tell her to take things slow but are encouraging it by helping her look at houses and shit, dad seems to like the guy because he's a salt-of-the-earth line of duty meathead
>I'm expected to shower her with attention when she does ruin her life by getting knocked up
This holiday season has been the fucking worst. In addition to COVID and all of the horrible shit associated with someone in my SO's family slowly succumbing to a particularly awful form of cancer and having to face the fact that my belief system and values are fundamentally different than my family's, I have to watch my sister happily destroy her life in pursuit of dick and the white trash prestige of being a '[dumbass' profession] wife'. I can't even take short reprieve from all of this shit + my demanding job because of the 'rona. I feel like I'm hanging onto my composure by a thread and that the slightest additional weight will cause it to snap.
My sister >>703564
said the same thing under the argument that her annoying neighbor isn't looking for work because he likes being on unemployment. I tried to see how low she + my parents would go and argued that people who live on benefits should be rounded up and gassed, and she said she was proud of me for holding such beliefs and agreed. Some people are too self-centered and comfortable to have empathy.
Sounds like your family is afraid that she isn't able to care for herself well or will be lonely, so they're placing all their bets on the guy who's going to promise her a house and a family even if he's got issues because they figure it might be her best chance at happiness. They falsely equate his career status to stability for your sister, even though he sounds unstable in other ways.
Forgive if I'm off about that, there would just be no other explanation I could think of for why everyone else is okay with this except you. Clearly you're one of the only people who holds your sis to a higher standard. It's a shame his views are already rubbing off on her. I don't know what you could do or say to change her course but I do empathize.
I feel a bit like your sister. Not that I've married a scrote before but I do feel like at times what's supposed to be my 'support' circle has given up on me. Like they encouraged me to go forward with bad matches while negging whoever was good because they had some vision of who they saw me with versus who would actually be good for me in the long term.
Guess I'm trying to say that she's lucky she's got a sister like you batting in her corner.
The weird thing is that she has an extremely stable middle-class job and could easily find a guy who could 'provide for her'; in fact, before meeting this one she was basically cycling through medical residents. You're spot-on with the family part; they probably just want grandkids and are enamored with the idea of the salt-of-the-earth working-class hero the guy embodies.
Thanks for the kind words. It sounds like you could definitely use some new people in your life, people who want the best for you instead of trying to mold you according to their own ideals. People who do that are shallow and selfish.
Well yeah. I think in a time where people are struggling more than ever, you guys are acting a little tone-deaf.
Not saying you can’t exist this way or that it’s inherently wrong,—just most ordinary people don’t live in any type of opulence, and don’t want to hear about it either. I think it’s natural, and just something you’ll have to learn to deal with. Maybe make more wealthy friends, idk.
That’s some really salty shit, so friends should only talk about their bad and depressing moments because the happiness of their friends triggers
The success of someone close to you shouldn’t be something that makes you stop talking to them.
How is it success if you were born into it? You literally did nothing.
Just talk about everyday things and interests, surely you can't be that obsessed with being rich?
>>703688>How is it success if you were born into it? You literally did nothing.
Original venting anon here- I got a degree in a lucritive field and make 110k a year. I have been very smart with my money and have made very good investments, which have lead to a decent amount of money beyond my salary. However, I was able to do so because my parents helped me go to college. Does that qualify to you as doing "literally nothing"? Because to a lot of people, it seems to and it's honestly just irritating and factually incorrect. Completely devaluing a person's success because their parents did what parents are supposed to do is rather stupid as well as assholeish. Especially if you're supposed to be their friend. This also is not new to the pandemic era by any means.
I also don't believe I'm tone def. I don't talk about luxury shit unless it's relevent (for example, if someone mentions a place I've been to, I will mention I travelled there, amd things like that). However, I'm not going to dress differently or buy a lower end car because it makes some people feel bad to ve reminded that some people can afford nice things. That's a them problem.
I get what you're saying about keeping my friends group within my class so that I don't have this issue, but that feels like a really shitty thing to do. It also isn't really practical to execute.
My stepfather made more money than my bio dad, but was consistently worse off in terms of lifestyle, despite living in a location with a significantly lower cost of living. After growing up observing them both, as well as my wealthy and poor friends parents, and a sibling who dated a guy who won the fucking lottery, I have to agree that decision making plays a larger role than people want to believe.
The brutal reality is that it would not matter how much money you gave many poor people. You could give them 50 million dollars in a settlement (actually happened to someone I know) and they would spend it all. Every fucking penny. And in a few years they would be right back where they started. They could have 20 dollars left in their bank account, and KNOW that they need it for gas to get to work tomorrow, but instead they would impulsively spend it on fast food when they have a freezer full of overpriced TV dinners. Then of course later that night beg friends and family for money for gas. The wealthy people I know are frugal as fuck. They shop at costco. They have money because they don't spend it on stupid shit, and when they do buy something they don't need they make sure it's nice as hell and going to last.
My friends who grew up in wealthy environments but exhibited the qualities of my poor family members ended up poor. My friends who grew up in poor environments but exhibited the qualities of my wealthy family members ended up middle class. The ability to delay gratification is a severely necessary trait if you want to keep any of the money you earn. Yes shit is unfair, but it's also not entirely outside your control. You're not a helpless dandelion puff in the wind, you can orient yourself in the right direction. Doesn't mean the wind will always blow, but it's more effective than blaming everyone else and continuing to piss away everything you've got in a vain attempt to mask your insecurity.
I know my experiences don't speak for everyone, nor encompass the entirety of the issue, but that doesn't make them untrue.
are you >>703339
? ntayrt but i'm rooting for you. also im speaking from experience here, for dnd i would look into places on reddit, like r/lfg, pretty diverse and you could find something that interests you
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Why the FUCK do you always act like anything asked of you is a big inconvenience? Mom just simply asked you throw the trash out who the fuck do you think you are just saying no to her like that. Half the time I want to smack the shit out of you for talking to her like that. When you left for school was the most peaceful 2.5 years in this house. Get some Prozac and meditate or some shit and calm the fuck down.
I also know it's you that leaves piss streaks on the toilet bowl and CLEAN OUT THE SHOWER if you insist on taking a shower everyday after work! YOU PIG
I also don’t like that some people act as if the rich are soulless demons who don’t work, while the poor are all these hard working, sweet angels. Plenty rich people worked hard for what they have, and also just because someone was born into money doesn’t mean they’ve had a perfect life.
I think a lot of the hatred of the rich is because people are unable to process their envy in a healthy way, so they paint a wealthier person as bad. Lot of it is just cope.
Fuck this shit. Just because you’re mad at your husband doesn’t mean you can put your anger out onto me. It’s not my fucking fault the both of you are retarded as shit and can’t talk things out like normal adults without flipping shit and breaking everything in the house. I can’t even bring myself to call you mom or dad because of all the pain you’ve brought me throughout my childhood, and you really have the audacity to compare me to my brother who you’ve never even tried to beat not once in his whole entire life. I literally have no emotional bond to either of these people. I remember the last time my dad touched me, it was so he could try to beat me. And that was just last year. Do you really think I want to help you out? When your husband doesn’t even want to clean up after himself, you need to take it up with him. God, the both of them are so goddamn retarded it leaves me speechless. I literally try to have as little contact with them as possible, but she tries to start shit with me by the littlest things. Fuck, I really don’t give a shit about either of you. The both of you never really cared about me, so why should I give a shit about you? I cry, you call me crazy. I don’t react, you say I’m retarded and I don’t care. Go and pamper your son who you love so much. Not once in my life have I ever been happy in the presence of the two of you. The only thing that I feel when I’m around the two of you is my flight or fight response. I hope the both of you forever live together in misery, just as you always have.
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you bitches have absolutely no fucking taste. SHAYNA? As milkiest cow? Over GIMPGIRL?? I genuinely will never understand what people find so interesting about shaytard, there’s only so many different ways to comment on her fatness before you start repeating yourself. Her thread literally looks like:
>pic of shayna looking fat
>”holy shit she’s porky”
>”oh no she’s so fat”
>“lay off the lunchables shatna!”
>screen cap from her bad porn
>“wow she looks like a lunch lady here”
>”iS tHaT a BoiL oN hEr vAgiNa??????” x5
>“She looks haggard”
>pic of a lame tweet she made
>”she is so lame”
>”look at the likes, no one wants her kek”
>”$3 only fans, sad!”
>repeat for 17 threads
>>703701>However, I was able to do so because my parents helped me go to college. Does that qualify to you as doing "literally nothing"? >Completely devaluing a person's success because their parents did what parents are supposed to do is rather stupid as well as assholeish
Anon, you are literally admitting that your parents helped you go to school. I'm not saying you didn't work hard (idk you, so maybe you did or you didn't), but you can't deny that someone having well-off parents can help a lot. If you didn't get into the school you got into, and didn't have the parents that you have, do you think you would still be in the place you are? Nepotism can play a big role in a person success, and that's usually luck based.
I'm not saying it's wrong to use nepotism to your advantage (that's what networking is for), but no one of "devaluing" your success by acknowledging the fact that you didn't completely do it on your own.
I hate when I tell someone that I got something new, and the first question is the price. Like fuck you for asking that, I didn't wanna make it about price or wealth, why everyone always gotta make it about that?
Now I just keep purchases to myself
I am flabbergasted how she's so popular too. I guess people really enjoy laughing at fat whores.>>703845
I'm extremely relieved she's not talked about here anymore. It's obvious that being posted on gossip sites triggered
her to upgrade from bloodletting to getting her legs amputated. I don't want to participate in that horror in any way. She's doing it for spectators. I refuse to be one.
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I know I just made a post about my brother a few days ago, but I just came to a realization about him.
Could it be that what he wants is a brother? We have an older brother, but he is barely in the house, our father died years ago and we don't spend much time with other family members. I said this because, just a few weeks ago he had a slumber party with his male ex-classmates, and I can swear, he hasn't been that happy with neither my mom or me, ever since a long time ago. He was laughing and having a fun time. That made me remember one of his birthdays, where he wasn't happy at all when we gave him the meal he asked for but when his friend came over, he suddendly was into the mood to celebrate. While mildly disappointed, I just thought that it happened because he was his friend; but then I got told by our mom that he may need another male figure in his life. I always believed that he thought that I was enough of a family to be seeing as someone he could trust on, but I am begining to fear that I may not be enough. Besides, he has made derogatory comments about me being a girl before.
I always wonder how different my life could have been if I were born as a guy, what kind of person I could have become, but now I can't stop thinking that if I were a man, maybe my brother would treat me less coldly, maybe he could like me more as another friend of his.
I know this is stupid, I don't want to believe that the reason he has been acting so badly is because of that, but I can't help but wonder if we could get a better relationship if I wasn't a girl.
I just want to go back when we were younger and we could have fun together.
I didn't? Read >>703866
. I literally never said it was a bad thing anons parents helped her go to school.
You sound like my relatives who think homeless people don’t deserve help because they didn’t try hard enough or are just lazy lmao most rich people already had a leg up like you and it’s a privilege in the first place because many people can’t afford an education/have to work full time during. Poverty is also more complex than “you should’ve invested in stocks instead of spending 20 bucks on some beer” as if the issue starts and ends with how people spend their minimum wage.
Reminds me of those “how to get rich” videos that bootlick because they somehow believe that they can also become Elon Musk with that attitude and poor people are only poor because they buy stupid things to show off.
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nta, lmao at “because of the pandemic”. Just admit your braindead parents screwed the pooch and failed to give you a more comfortable life
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>>703515>It's not my fault their parents are poor losers
Yeah, its obviously the fault of the kids who were born and raised to be wage slaves in a country with horrible and decreasing upwards mobility (assuming because this post sounds American as fuck). Plenty of rich people buy exactly the same vices and the only reason they can afford to get away with their shitty choices is their parents. Boo-hoo, so sorry people keep disrespecting the baller life choices you were able to make with your generational wealth. You are clearly the victim
here. There there. Dry your tears, perhaps with some of daddy's cash
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You sound so stupid and arrogant. At this point I think this is a bait, nobody can be that oblivious I hope.
Also should I stop caring about other women and their leaked nudes when they’re traumatized?
Idk it never turns out good for me when I defend thots, I’m just their free tampon and then they toss me away
Similar thing happens to me. I stick my neck out for women in my mutual circles who claim harassment and give them encouraging words, only to find out they deleted me off socials later???
The only conclusion I can come to is that they think I'm nose deep in drama (despite never posting anything drama related on my socials) and am two faced or something. Maybe I'm just an emotional tampon who comes to know too much about them and they think they need to get rid of me. Obviously I get put on the shitlists of the people they're accusing for siding with their victims
, only to somehow make it on the victim
's shitlists too for no actual reason or offense.
It's somewhat irritating but I don't know what there is to be done about it. I either look weak or hypocritical for not taking a stand for issues I care about, or I get slapped in the face for it later.
Is it okay for me to feel angry over this?
> A family member who doesn't like me ends up being forced to give me a gift on my birthday, the gift itself is obviously meant to be for mother because it's heavily related to her work. She wanted to just come to celebrate my birthday without giving at least a bar of chocolate idk.
> Time passes, its Christmas. I bought nice, thoughftul gifts for everyone, looking at their tastes and lifestyles. For her I bought a cute blanket and box of nice Japanese snacks that also had a cute plush charm in it. I don't like her too much because she's rude, but I think everyone deserves a nice gift and its best to be polite.
> … I end up getting a 3$ notebook from AliExpress. She given 5 gifts to each person in the family in front of me, all of which costed at least 30$. One of the gifts for mother also turned out to be the exact same thing she was forced to gift to me on my birthday.
I felt sad for the rest of the Christmas, because I putted so much effort just to get nothing back. Also everyone, including her knows that I do not use Notebooks so I feel like as if it was done on purpose.
I also wanted Christmas to be family-like, play a boardgame with everyone, but the second I suggested a game she left, along with other person (but with them its understandable, they are not good at english) so in the end I had to play a 5player game with 3 people in total. I just wanted to feel like an actual family because my own is so far away. I hate it.
My mom told me to not sympathize with whores she learnt the hard way she went through similar stuff.
Obviously I shouldn’t refer to them as whores but I’m angry how much I’ve gotten betrayed. I knew it by the sexual abuse threads and the vent threads that the feminists in here are 2faced as fuck.
and if the bitch i ranted about told me to not metoo the guys because they have too much on them…. but why was she ok to throw me in a lion’s den and screencap petty shit i said about the guys who have my info?
Honestly I do not sympathize anymore with women who are like this. Help me anon, what should I do? I’ve helped so many thots who were suicidal but not once have i gotten a reward
I never said it was their fault they were born to irresponsible parents? I just said it wasn't mine and it's stupid for them to take their frustration out on people who had more responsible parents.
>Plenty of rich people buy exactly the same vices and the only reason they can afford to get away with their shitty choices is their parents.
I am failing to see the point you are trying to make. My point is, it is financially irresposible (and bad parenting, quite frankly) for parents to be wasting all their extra money on such unneccesarry vices instead of investing it in their child's future. What you're saying is completely irrelevant to that point.>>703866
I do acknowledge it's an advantage, but I don't see how it's justifyable or necesarry to resent people, especially your friends, over getting help paying for college? And yes, the friends my OP is about DO devalue my success. They don't just acknowledge that parental help is an advantage, they straight up devalue everything I've accomplished or decions I made. And they get angry over me merely existing around them wearing nice things or driving a nice car. Like, they're letting their misplaced anger get in the way of our friendship.
Also, not trying to be snarky, but just so you know- you're using the word neoptism wrong. Neopotism is when you're given favorable treatment that you wouldn't otherwise get, because your parent is an authority figure. For example- if your dad is a CEO and hires you for a job you are underqualified for, just because your his kid. >>703989
No I don't and nothing about my post implies I do unless you're REALLY oversensitive.>>703959
No, you're not supposed to feel bad for me. I'm venting about something that bothers me… because this is a vent thread. Also, this is not new to the pandemic.
Also, I wanna clarify that this >>703701
was my last post and none of the other anons replying to anyone since then are me.
Well a small thank you for listening to them
Maybe even a smallfriendship
Or if that’s too much asked
Well enough for not getting my messages forwarded to the guys that give no shit about her trauma
She even screencapped that shit on snapchat secretly and I don’t get why she did that.
But you’re right. I’m gonna just be more selective about my circles. Those people are not gonna make me a misogynist.
Lmao, they sound like an underage edgelord sociopath, but not the person saying they should have their head chopped off?
Bitter poorfagism is one strong mental disorder.(infighting)
I can see why you're annoyed, but hey you did your duty and satisfied your conscience for this year. Next year you know to just give a thoughtful card with nothing in it.
I keep getting scrooged by my cousin every year. This year I sent a $20 gift card with a nice card and all I got was a crappy card that her parents obviously sent with nothing much written in it. So I decided next year a thoughtful card will suffice because spending $5 to buy a card and pay for postage is no skin off my bones. I used to enjoy spoiling her with Lush giftsets and Starbucks cards, but she's past 20 now, employed, and is fully capable of reciprocating my efforts if she really wanted to but she doesn't.
Maybe my mother who I went no contact with is poisoning the well in regards to my relationship with relatives but regardless I'm done feeling bad about them. I only give what I can logically expect to give back. That system doesn't tend to disappoint me.
Anon, just replying to say you're not alone, I have gone through this as well and am currently debating whether I should bother going to the doc for ongoing stomach issues myself. If you do go, don't give up on advocating for yourself, especially as a woman. It's well-documented that doctors don't take the medical issues of women very seriously, and that's only more true if you happen to be a woman of color
. Best of luck, I really hope you feel better.
Thank you. I was really having a dilemma on my morals, but it makes sense what you’re saying. I guess I should find friends who think like me. I was also scared I’d get harassed so that made me stressed out. But they have nothing on me that makes me a bad person aside from my bad language which I have coz mento. (i’m working on it)
A big relief. I’ll just get focused on my goals. Best wishes to you anon, thank you for giving me a good perspective.
Maybe I'm just petty, but I would ask her to give your gift back, and return the notebook to her. It's clear she dislikes you. In the future maybe you two can just agree to not give gifts to eachother? Maybe asking for the gift back will incite drama but, like I said I'm petty so that's just what I though of.
If she doesn't wanna give the gift back, then maybe you can give it to younger family friend or donate it or something.>>704147
I agree with this 100% and I don't see how anyone who grew up poor around other poor people can genuinely see them all universally as hardworking down on their luck angels. I've noticed a lot of the putting the poor on a pedestal comes from middle/lower middle class people who haven't actually been heavily exposed to poor people.
Just like with any group, there are some shitty fucking poor people. People who will steal from individuals, even friends or family, people who will spit out as many kids as they please with no fucks given about that child's quality of life, people who will make bad decisions every step of the way but still make where they ended up someone else's fault. Not to mention, tons of poor people are racist AF and vote against their best interests all the time. They will literally vote for politicians who openly want to slash benefits they use.
So yeah. This meme of putting poor people on a pedestal needs to fucking die. A lot of rich people suck and a lot of poor people suck. A lot of people in between suck, too. Your financial situation in no way reflects how good of a person you are.
>>703886>I guess people really enjoy laughing at fat whores.
Because it's low hanging fruit.
The tears happen when the cow starts to become better than the lolcow audience. Most farmers can not spread their legs while telling the internet about it and maintain an average weight at minimum.
nobody puts poor people on a pedestal, except for other poor people. literally every group does this for themselves and their peers.
it's not comparable to middle class people simping for billionaires, for example.
I don't get it, she's a blast. Maybe because she's a relatively new and slow cow?
I hope she unprivates r/pickmes, I miss her insanity
God I hope not… is it normal for it not to be constant? sometimes I can look at myself and think I look okay. one time I took a selfie, a very rare thing for me, and thought "wow, I don't hate this" and made it my pfp on my socials. I even got some compliments and felt pretty good about it. then again, i woke up the next day and i swear it looked completely different to me. I thought I could push through it and kept it up as "exposure therapy" hoping I could learn to like it again but I was just absolutely miserable every time I'd get a message and see my face.
I also don't think about or obsess over my appearance often… but that's more of a choice to spare myself the grief, I think. as a teen I was always body checking and looking in mirrors and I guess instead of learning to deal with it I just stopped looking at myself entirely so I wouldn't think about it as much. my skin/hair routine has suffered as a result though… making me more insecure about my features… I hate this
**Way too old
I used to be pretty close to my cousin, until she married a giant manchild with a rotten walnut for a brain.
He has no respect for her, and has openly admitted so to everyone who comments on his attitude towards her. If a woman tells him that he's being a giant asshole, he just laughs in their face.
Apparently my cousin married him because she enjoys having someone to mother and take care of (ick). Nevermind that now when they have three actual kids, he's still not holding up his end as a father. Women in my family applaud him on the rare occasion he does change a diaper or put the kids to sleep. My mother knows how much I hate him, and updates me whenever this happens as some sort of "proof" that he actually does care. I'm told to not be rude towards him, nevermind that he can make all the jokes he wants about women and horrible "feminazis" at the dinner table, in front of his kids.
He also made the argument that he can't change his daughter's diapers because seeing her naked makes him feel like a pedophile, which raises enough red flags for me already. I was scolded for telling him how creepy that was. No matter what I say, my comments are constantly shut down by the other women in my family. My cousin just sits in silence and neither agrees or disagrees with anyone, but it's clear that she's depressed because she's stuck in a full time job with four children, two of them toddlers, tons of debt and no savings.
I have barely seen them this year due to the pandemic, but a few of us in the family have a group chat where we post pictures and updates about our lives. My cousin posted a picture of the oven having burnt cheese stuck to the bottom because her husband didn't bother to use a baking sheet for his frozen pizza. I asked why is she cleaning up his mess. He told me to mind my own fucking business, because apparently he doesn't care if the kitchen smells burnt, and if my cousin does - it's her problem to deal with.
I have now blocked him on every social media, and plan to barely talk or look at him whenever we meet in real life. If I'm not allowed to tell him what I think of him, I'm not gonna give him any attention at all.
The most popular cows seem to be the ones that farmers can identify with or have a self-serving reason to tear down (e.g. the e-whores in Shay's threads and jelly weebs in wenus' threads) or drew a lot of new farmers onto the site. GIMPGIRL is so fucking weird that she's hard to identify with and there's no self-esteem boost to be gained from tearing her down; as such, the only farmers that enjoy her are probably the ones that are here just to gawk at trainwrecks and drama.>>704315>Can not knowing if you've experienced CSA cause vaginismus?
If you're hyper-fixated on CSA then yeah. The condition isn't caused by the act of being abused, it's psychosomatic, basically a harm-avoidance behavior gone wrong.
>>704345>I have now blocked him on every social media, and plan to barely talk or look at him whenever we meet in real life. If I'm not allowed to tell him what I think of him, I'm not gonna give him any attention at all.
Good for you. The people in your family allowing him to be a giant fucking asshole, the women including your cousin, are at least part of the reason he's so flagrant about being the way he is. It sucks that no one supports you, but he's not worth your time at the very least. Try not to let anyone in your family guilt you into keeping the peace along with them. He's getting plenty of coddling without you and will unfortunately
live kek. Fuck that guy.
lololl I like to think I typed fast enough for them not to have read anything but i dunno. I'm actively trying to quit porn too I don't want to watch porn and even if it's vanilla, all porn is degenerate and not something I want anyone to know i watch because it's as if I support it.
I feel better now though lol
Wow all these choices are shit
I’ll never understand why so many people give a shit about shayna.
Also unrelated but they should really lock that egirls thread or whatever the fuck it is. Seems like it’s just them self posting.
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I've been sitting on this stupid handheld bidet for a month cause the valve connected to my toilet won't unscrew and it's so close to the wall that I'm hugging the bowl every time I try. I bought like three wrenches already and none of them have the right grip.
So close to paying a plumber an exorbitant amount to install it for me. I just want a clean butt god fucking damn
I don't hate myself, my self esteem is actually pretty good with a few specific insecurities. But I would STILL feel uncomfortable giving a man a front row seat to my flaws by dating him seriously - like, I feel attractive enough generally but when it comes to getting naked and being touched, it's too confronting. I keep putting off dating until I lose a few more kg even though I'm already pretty slim, idk how fat or bad bodied people (who aren't super confident) can stand to have sex because I'm too self conscious about my imperfections as is.
There are lots of women who seem to get legitimate self esteem boosts from male attention though, I rarely trust a man's compliments but maybe if you're willing to believe them it's possible to both hate yourself and want a guy around.
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Would something like this help?
My bf did something super cunty with plausible deniability that he's just an oaf. But it felt like he tested me or basically did something on purpose so I wouldn't ask for his help again.
I drove my car with him to pick up a sushi order. He didn't want any. I realized going out to the car that the server got my roe nigiri order wrong and rang it as sashimi, so the roe sat precariously on these dumb cucumber boats. It was super busy and I didn't want to wait inside while they remade it. I explained and asked bf to be super careful cause it was two containers stacked on top of each other. When we got to the apartment, before getting out of the car I reminded him to be careful. He just looked at me so slow? As in he couldn't comprehend that I had asked him to carry the food up. It's like the wheels in his head were turning and making decisions about something. I grabbed his thermos for him and was waiting for him to open his door and get out so I could lock my car. He didn't hold the bag by the plastic handles, he held it by the sides as he fumbled. I didn't want to tell him what to do cause I thought he had his grip. I didn't want to be a naggy mommy and tell him how one gets out of a car and holds a bag. It was like he forgot how to do both but he finally unbuckled, opened the door, and turned to motion to get out. So I turn to my side to get out and I hear my damn sushi container drop and spill out to the pavement after I just cautioned. Really?!
Half of the roe spilled to the road and the rest was in a pool at the bottom of the container.
I was really mad. He's all like "I'll pay you back!" So what? $8? I make free homecooked food for you almost every night dude, and sometimes I even make free lunch for you to take to work. I just asked you to be competent for a minute and you failed that. I stormed away with my sad carry out bag and he follows me behind saying "This is why you shouldn't trust me with these things." How convenient, so this is all actually my fault! So I said how yeah, I won't be trusting him to do shit for me anymore if that's his excuse.
I feel like he was trying to test a script with me. Like he wanted me to mollycoddle him and tell him that wasting half my food was okie dokie cause it was just an assident, with the added bonus of me subvertly never asking for his help (aka shit he doesn't want to do) ever again lest this be the consequence. But fuck it. I'm glad I was upset and told him exactly how I felt, he should feel a little bad. I'm still gonna ask him for help if I need it and be real shitty if he gives me trouble about small shit like helping me carry a fucking bag. Call me a bitch, idc.
Omg I feel so frustrated for you! He needs to straighten up anon. I came here because I have a similar gripe about my bf,
Today my bf offered to help me set up an irrigation system,I explained to him 3 times how to lay out tubing because it's crucial to lay it out in a certain way, & he manages to still fuck it up. Then when I reprimand him about messing it up& setting us so far back,he says it's my fault for 'not watching him.' like, you're a grown ass man! How is it my doing if you can't take direction?
I feel this. hard to find a guy you enjoy being around who isn’t a loser in other ways. Like if you want kids and don’t feel like a single mom, you need a guy who is responsible and ready for that.
I’ve only dated guys my age though. Maybe the natural solution is to go a little older to find guys who (supposedly) have their shit together a little more.
smart, attractive, ambitious, reliable, responsible, respectful, shares similar goals and worldview to mine, is not a cumbrain degenerate. I don't have impossible standards, the problem is that the clock is ticking>>704549
Yeah it's exactly that. The other aspect is that the pandemic makes it almost impossible to meet new people, so I feel even more intensely like I'm losing time
Yea exactly, I meant more like 5 years. I would be weary of anything much more because that’s not the type of relationship I want.
Regarding large age gaps though, it’s often transactional to begin with. Woman uses man for money/connections, man using her for youth. So inevitably when woman gets replaced, it’s not like some huge heartbreak because she never truly loved the man.
I've been in the same relationship for nearly a decade. You obviously won't know what somebody is really like until you move in with them, but you can mitigate risk, i.e. make good decisions about who to invest your time in before then. If you're so worried about shacking up with a loser that you either don't use good judgment in determining who to date or avoid dating then you're going to end up screwed or alone.>>704587
You're doing the right thing imo. It's way better to bond organically than to flip through a bunch of men in search of someone who meets a shallow set of criteria and meet up with them in hopes that they're not shitty.
That reminds me of my abusive
older cousin who would steal my 3ds to watch porn/lol I hentai on it and cum
on it fuck him
I saw another anon mention this a while ago when I was searching it, but it's too late to reply now, so here I am
Anyone saw those devacurl hair damage videos by Ayesha Malik? I saw those when they came out, and it's sad and all, but something about her rubs me the wrong way. She's just so melodramatic and talks in a way like no one could possibly understand her pain, because her hair was sooo much prettier than anyone else's. Maybe I'm reading too much into her presentation. BUT, the part that pissed me off, was her saying she's going to have to cut off all her hair/shave her head, before disappearing for months. Then a youtube friend of hers, India Batson, actually played a voicemail from Ayesha saying she had to shave her head - meaning, she had, at that point, ALREADY shaved her head. Then she pops up, a few months later, to show how her hair was perfectly back to normal - still long and barely changed.
I mean, lots of girls/women listened to her and used devacurl because Ayesha promoted it, then stopped using it because she said it was damaging her hair - so she knows her influence over her audience. But she blatantly lies and said she cut off all her hair, which was probably imitated by some of her viewers who thought they needed to do that to grow back healthy hair? That's so fucking disingenuous and stupid. Ughhh I don't even have curly hair I don't know how I got so invested in this drama
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when I was a housekeeper (I'm a highly educated immigrant, literally nobody here wants to hire immigrants where I live unless it's to work in fast food or cleaning firms) people used to treat me like garbage and assume I'm stupid just because I speak with an accent and work as a housekeeper. We also operated on a review-based system so even if someone was an absolute cunt to you and gave you a shit rating, you had to be nice or they would complain to your supervisor.
at some point a rich fucking woman who lived in a literal mansion hired me for 1 hour to clean her mirrors and threw a tantrum when I didn't also clean the floors. the house was spotless, there was nothing else to clean, because another cleaner had been there that day (she didn't like how she left streaks on the mirrors so she hired me). she called me stupid, I told her if she's so much smarter than me she should be able to clean her own floors and mirrors.
people who have never had to work a day in their lives love to shit on min wage workers because they know that will never be them.
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I think that if you're not feeling well in a group or place you should not leave, you should insist until things are good. But everybody says the opposite, that you should leave and forget? It's frustrating. I want to win them over.
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I wish I could get plastic surgery, but everyone around me is against it. My boyfriend said that he loves how I look and that he thinks it's unattractive and unnecessary to get plastic surgery. While I'm really happy that he loves me the way I am, I am probably average or slightly below average (I kinda look similar to Kirsten Stewart… or Venus but with a longer face, fuller lips and less mousy) and could go for a nose job and some lip fillers. Probably never will and will try to love myself more, but damn, I could look so much better.
Plastic surgery isn't worth it in most cases. A lot of people who get it either regret it or later on need to get it fixed and dump more money into it to remove it because it warps over time.
Instead focus on working out, drinking water, using carmex. (I like putting on a little carmex before I sleep and then waking up to naturally plumped lips) Selfcare/working out is more healthy for you and you can look so much better inside out and feel good about it.
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Card from me to you. Print it out and put it on your bedside table. Make sure to use gif paper.
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I know and hate this feeling
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I just feel so alone, I feel like I don't belong with people at all, im a tard with neuro-developmental issues and its been getting worse as me and people my age grow older, I could pass as just slightly weird when I was 18 but now on my 20s I feel like people just don't have the patience or interest to be around me, truth is no one wants to be around people like me, and online friendships just don't cut it, im really horrible at texting/sending dms frequently enough and I need the real life stimulus.
I have no family, no friends, my job is fine but im not really passionate about it to make it my joie de vivre, I wish I could just die silently and painlessly in my room, why does de the universe allow people like me to exist?
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I have a sneaking suspicion my co-workers think I'm stuck/rude because I don't drop everything to interact with them while on the job. When I get focused in on something I put all my mental focus
into finishing my task while they have time for small talk, I'm usually left out of it. I'm terrible at having chats while doing something and if they do try to talk to me like "How are you doing? How was Christmas for you?" I usually give them a one word response like "Fine" or "It was good" and then they react like that wasn't the answer they wanted when that's all I had to say. Fuck I just have terrible social stamina compared to everyone else.
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I don't get people who claim that talent and hard work is all you need to success in art. It's bullshit. Your class/economic background and connections are just as important, if not more. Here where I live, the majority of kids who got into drama school or fine arts academy had private lessons or paid courses. A working class 15-20 year old won't have 2k to spend on a 3 months course. Becoming an actor here is impossible without higher education. Even actors playing in shitty tv dramas graduated from drama schools. I remember Christopher Eccleston talking about the lack of working class representation in the arts. He said he could not have gone to drama school today, because his parents could not have afforded to pay for it. But in my country, where we have "free" higher education, the wast majority of kids who got into good drama or art schools had months of training in paid preparatory courses, and that's something a working class kid wouldn't be able to afford. So there's more to this problem than just whether higher education is public or not. Art became completely commodified by the upper class.
Now, when you take playing an instrument seriously, not just as a hobby. Even something "pleb" tier like a guitar (one of the cheapest options). If your parents are well educated and upper or middle class there are higher chances they will take your art-related interests more seriously and they won't force you to go to work right after high school, you can just get your instruments and focus on creating bedroom pop or some other normie shit, and you can still live with your parents who will pay for your food etc. But if you don't have this privilege and you have to work 8 hours a day 5 days a week to support yourself, you won't have nearly the same amount of time for practice. There's a couple of industry plants who started like this because their parents paid for everything and some of them also had connections in the music industry as either artists or corporate marketers. And yet, their rise to fame is painted by them and the media as organic and humble. "Hey look, this young person is JUST like you! You can just create a couple of songs in your room and become famous out of nowhere!" They will never ackowledge their privilege, they're disconnected from reality. I won't even mention the difference in mentality and motivation of someone who had parents doing art-related stuff and showing them support, and someone who not only didn't have that but was also constantly discouraged by family who could never-ever see art as a serious career path. Although industry plants existed for many years, in the 90s and even early 00s it was still possible to have an organic, mainstream success. But now it's almost impossible or highly unlikely. The music industry is 100% controlled and saturated. They perfected the recipe for a star so now stars are made, not born. Why would they take risks with an "outsider", especially from a working class, if they can just create a star from the scratch and have full control over them. I'm so pissed thinking about talented and sensitive people who just gave up at some point because they weren't able to focus on art because they didn't have the class privilege
I feel these days it's getting harder to be an authentic artist because so many people claim to be them when they're not or have little talent. These days with music it's just having a weird aesthetic, create some shocking ass lyrics and thread together a song. Go viral.
Ppcocaine, Melanie Martinez with their weird kiddie vibe. Gaga did it by being a freak back in the day. You've always got people who go with their niche and they run with that.
There's no care for proper talent anymore I find. It's all what's catchy, what's popular for the sake of it being popular really.
Acting is just now anyone who is already famous getting a role despite not being able to act all that well or they've got the right connections. That's it.
I can't even name a movie that I last enjoyed either because everything feels the same these days. Music, movies. But I can watch stuff from the 80s and 90s and it's actually fucking good.
That's the set precedent, anon: nobody can make money or a name for themselves in arts or entertainment as long as they have bills to pay. It doesn't matter how many people you know or how dedicated your fans are, it's about who in the existing industry you know. Gatekeeping, Nepotism is an economic tool just like poverty, but until it's well known enough that people get collectively angry and laws start changing that's the way it's gonna stay. Young people create trends that older, fading rich assholes buy into so they can cling to relevance, they have a vested interest in making sure each new generation of young people can't take their lives into their own hands. Trying to fund your own dreams is impossible when working normal jobs won't even cover standard living expenses like rent, food and healthcare, now imagine trying to produce and promote yourself with no money after working all week? You can't. And sure, there are ways for new talent to make it but they're basically casting couches.
All musicians in the insudtry now were vouched for by someone else or is being used to make money by someone else. Music is a business, so if you want to be a real musician and live for the music and your fans, you cannot
give a fuck about fame.
Case in point, George Clooney is one I considered a good actor, but Midnight Sky was fucking awful.
Music, fashion and movoes such because the last lineup won't let sny new blood in to freshen things up and eveyone is getting sick of watching aging narcs steal youth trends for relevance because they have nothing else going for them. Imagine being rich and famous, and still having as much personality as the average nobody.
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I know I'm not liked at my new office job but sometimes their passive aggression is ridiculous even if it's expected that I be shat on for the basis that I'm the newbie. It's hard enough to have to force pleasant greetings, banter, and smiles unless I want to be labeled things like 'mean' and solidary just cause I have a bitchface and look serious/intense. I say good morning to these bitches and they barely acknowledge me, and never greet me. It really fucking sucks, I consider myself friendly and helpful in my interactions so I know I've never given them a reason to treat me that way. Just typical hostile work environment politics bs.
This morning they had a go at me because apparently I was typing loudly. The only email I wrote all morning. Idk, I guess I can type loud sometimes but usually it's because I'm focused, and having long nails doesn't help. They joked about how I must've been going off on someone and to calm down hA aH HA HA haha!
Crickets for the bitch CHEWING ICE ALL FUCKING DAY two cubicles behind me. Cause you know, how dare if my keyboard should clack doing something job related, but hearing someone chew, munch, and crunch all day is perfectly okey dokey smokey. Fuck me dead fam.
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I’ve been unemployed for about a week or so now and I’m trying to find another job, but I can feel myself withdrawing back into NEETdom again. Getting anxiety thinking about leaving the house, having to talk to an employer, make myself comfortable in another strange environment. Why am I like this? I’m totally fine and normal and even look forward to going to work when I do have a job. It only takes a couple of days for me to feel like an average working stiff. But when I have any length of time off work, I get sucked back into how I was before “becoming normie.” I fucking hate it.
>>705485>Why am I like this?
Short answer: Because you can be.
People are a lot more urgent and desperate for any work when they have bills to pay and the consequences are no food, no home, no car, etc. Most people don't like work and feel like stiffs doing it, the difference is most people have to or else.
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Stupid ass earthquakes, I'm so fucking tired of the shit. They've been happening 3 days in a row now and while I'm in no real danger I'm still a bit scared to go to sleep because I imagine that the bed is shaking again and it freaks me out.
Stupid thing stop moving and shaking my house I want to sleep and not be scared of dying.
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Just wanted to share that my bitchy, unaceppting family member didnt show up on today's meet up. Had a very nice, comfortable time!
Theres still hope, everyone. Don't give up.
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its so annoying when people call you a prude for not liking sex scenes or porn all that much, sex is cool but people frothing and screeching at you for not being as horny as they are is so annoying.
I know you deleted but I just wanted to say that I feel the same and suffered similarly.
My mom was a middle school teacher with a narcissistic personality so on top of thinking that she already knew better, her image couldn't be had with admitting she fucked up enough for her daughter to merit some therapy. She only wanted therapy for me when my bio dad was being a shit to me but that was just a session so she could confirm her victim status and assign blame for my state on anyone else but herself. She spent most of the time stigmatizing that therapy was only for the uber crazies, and she would get super pissed whenever I'd imply she needed some herself. I didn't know what personality disorders were when I was a young teen outside of depression, but she acted unhinged enough sometimes where I'd say that she was crazy, overreacting, or behaving irrationally. That was enough to stoke her rage screaming "Don't psychoanalyse me!" I was like, 15, lmao. I couldn't imagine being so threatened by my own child.
Well, I spent most of my teenage and early 20s mimicking her same traits and bullshit because it was normalized to me. I had disordered and unhealthy romantic relationships, shallow friendships, and zero coping skills for stress because seeing her act and put on a fake face for the outside world was all I known. People were harsh on me, and I endured some pretty severe consequences. It took doing extreme introspection and reading before I started to change.
But you know I'm happy when I see teenage girls batted for. I wish so badly that I had someone truly in my corner growing up. It upsets me that I didn't have that lot for myself, but I see people standing up for girls and women as a net benefit for our gender. The more we're understood, the less we're written off and dismissed and told to just keep quiet.
My sister and I having another fight, circlejerking to the same points again, and me being reminded why I can't stand to be around her at all. Why we don't hang out. She's a selfish narcissistic bitch who's always accusing me of being one, and I'm tired of it. We have no mutual interests. We can't bond worth shit, it hurts to be around her, it hurts to talk to her. She acts like she knows me, she doesn't know me worth shit, if she did, she'd actually care to take an interest in me. She doesn't. To be fair, I don't take an interest in her either. We might as well just both fuck off and die. There's no salvaging this shit. Once I leave my parents house and leave her I'm gone. I'm gone, fuck these people who've raised me to feel like this retarded piece of shit who can't do anything. It's exceedingly hard for me to save and spend money but now I'm banking on getting out by next year. I can't stand it anymore
I can relate. I've thought off and on about just committing and really trying to submit somewhere seriously though. You see how much shit is published, right? I fundamentally agree with you about connections and stuff, but sometimes those things can be developed over time, or they can start somewhere small and grow into something else.
What kind of work are you pursuing in the meanwhile? Have you thought about keeping a writing blog or journal for yourself? It can be fun to play with ideas and maybe something will really take off. There are also some financial scholarships and funds for creative writing. I've never applied for any of them but some real dipshits sometimes get them so there must be a way to do it.
I"m sitting here trying to finish a grad degree and I know that my field needs people like me. The way I think is different (sorry if that sounds self-absorbed, I just mean that I'm interested in bigger cultural themes while operating in a field that tends to focus on small details). I like to take on interesting topics, but the lack of support and excitement during the "development" phases of my projects is frustrating. I take a lot of pride in how I write, too, and I like my work to be elegantly presented. So if I don't like how I'm writing, I end up not writing anything. This is pretty bad for depression and progress. I'd like to commit to something in 2021 for myself - a kind of writing schedule - and see if anything comes of it. Maybe you'd like to try the same?
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Holy crap anon, my dad is the same way with me. I was pollyanna about this for years, believing he loved me in his own way, but over Christmas this year it just hit me that I can't take it anymore. Anything personal or an anecdote I share to him, over text or IRL, is met with exaggerated boredom and disinterest, as in "yeah, and?" Like who talks to people like that??!! Sharing problems, forget it. Ignored, or told it's my own fault. Never, ever, a word of sympathy or kindness. Yet I'm supposed to grind it down and live with it and never react. And yet he loves to spend the little time he does communicate with me, complaining about his own problems, never accepting solutions or even sympathy from me, his own daughter. It's like he never gained respect for me, ever since I was fucking born. Or something went so wrong that I once was an addict, I never stole from him or lied, yet I'm trash to him forever.
I have children now that he doesn't give one shit about. Never makes time for them, and when I used to invite him he would blow it off.
He's awful. It's like what you said, every comment I make is an excuse to put me down. I talk about a job, it's "No way, you can't do that, you're not capable." Mention the kids and he practically yawns in my face.
And yet if I start calling this out, the rage and denial come in to play. His childhood was fucked up allegedly, he left his siblings and mom for decades, bc they drank and used, and now he wants to be close to them.
He went from straight edge Evangelical christian family man, to depressed, weed smoking boomer. He says the church was a cult and there is no God.
Living with him during my addiction, I felt like I deserved to die, because he would silently rage slamming kitchenware. And yet for years in early recovery I gave him so much credit, just for not tossing me out on my ass. That's all he did though. I praised him to the heavens for it. And now I'm tired and I see through my previous blinders that I wanted to believe he has affection for me that will one day open up. Now I'm done. Fuck him, he wants to die alone so bad. He makes me feel like an outcast in my own family that they don't need or want me around, nor my children, now that we're happy on our own.
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I feel so insecure now and paranoid venting about things that genuinely make me feel depressed or hurt in general. I think a previous vent thread i vented about something that i felt hurt by, and people just came at me with snarky comments and just mocking me even going to the length to screenshot it and post it onto another thread mocking me.
Maybe im just being petty but, that shit hurt even more than the thing that hurt me i vented about. Im really trying not to vent about anything i feel very hurt by that people might take advantage of to make jokes that aren't even needed just because they think it shouldn't affect me and that it sounds dumb when in actuality it does affect me and it sounds logical to me to feel hurt by. I literally just want to vent without any judgement, i just want people to have a sort of understanding about my situations and just try to tell me what to do to make things better or what i should try to do instead of straight up clowning on me.
I do not even wanna say what i vented about because i just fear that the people who mocked me for it will try to mock me even more, it just gives me so much paranoia and i really fucking hate it.
I'm sorry you felt that way anon. Maybe you can try writing about it or speaking it aloud but alone? Or a therapist. Venting to ordinary people (especially to anons) can be hard and we can never expect their reactions. Your pain is valid
and I hope you feel better!
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im aware of it, trying to cope somehow that there are people who can be mean but i try to look on the brightside, i have seen anons here who are pretty laid back so i try not to let anything get me down. >>705747
Thank you so much that means alot, im currently seeking a therapist for the next year since we have lockdown, hoping to look forward to get my mental health better>>705748
Thank you so much! i appreciate that, i wish i could try to link the post somehow but im too scared of that, but i can say it's some situation i had with my boyfriend that really hurt me and even made me feel uncomfortable, tho im long over it and actually spoke with him about it things are good now. Some anons can be mean i agree with that, but i won't let that get me down. Im so sorry you went through the same thing, hope you are doing alright. Anyway, it was nice hearing those things dear anons, but i must go to bed, hope yall have a great night/day!
I'm finishing up my BA in the spring, so not looking for work atm. I'm hoping to find something writing-related, but I studied psychology, so idk how well that's going to go for me lmao. I do have experience in tutoring writing and some freelance stuff, though. Hopefully that plays to my advantage.
I literally get up every damn day with some sort of plan in mind for what I'm going to write/how much I'm going to write. Anxiety, depression and general imposter syndrome interrupts those plans approximately 70% of the time. At this point, I feel good if I can even write anything at all. Lockdown has really got me bummed out. I already hated school and am over my field of study, but having to do it all Zoom-style is just fucking abysmal. At least I'll be done soon.
I wouldn’t worry about it, some of these people who claim to have a bunch of crazy hobbies or interests are literally just narcissists who are lying or exaggerating to seem more accomplished/intriguing. Then the others are type A control freaks who can’t just sit and relax a minute so they need to fill their lives with noise .
Very few people on this earth are really THAT unique and interesting while also managing to be decent people in other areas of their lives. Just try to find things you like and don’t worry about it so much.
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this is going to sound so cringe but. Throughout the last 10 years I’ve had many male friends confess they “love me” or like me. While more than half were online it was still a pattern of me simply thinking I finally found someone with common interests and getting out of my shell a bit. I know this isn’t a unique situation. I’m really shy and dry on the surface but once I’m comfortable I’m borderline like. annoying autistic anime girl trope? which is why I think men feel the way they do despite me not flirting or anything. All I do is give support, encourage their positive interests and I’ve been told I’m quite “bubbly” when I’m myself.
Not gonna lie it’s a bit annoying. I don’t want to be their mothers, their gfs, their saviour. I just want a friend. And every time it happens and I inevitably don’t feel the same or already have a partner they either get really sad, block me, cling onto hope or other things. I’m not trying to shit on these men because obviously I liked them enough to spend time with them on a platonic level and get some good laughs, but idk what it is about me that makes men feel this way. Is my dumbness and nativité what’s doing it? I heard that sometimes when a girl isn’t sexual at all it makes men want to dirty them or something.
I probably sound like a 16 year girl but it was nice to get it off of my chest. I just wanna shitpost and play games to forget about work and and the effort it takes to glow up emotionally, mentally and physically.
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>got covid and recovered
>decided to go give plasma because the local blood drive was asking people recovered from covid to donate plasma
>turns out i cant give plasma because i have antibodies in my blood plasma that can destroy peoples lungs
>tell my mom and grandma about it thinking its nbd
>they look it up online
>first result says that the main cause of these antibodies is pregnancy
>they both get really pissed off and start questioning me
>mfw im literally a virgin and there's a 0% chance im pregnant or have ever been pregnant
>mfw im physically repulsed by 99% of men and wouldn't even want to have sex with them
Girl, please unload on the university. They have mental health care professionals that cover students. If they suggest trooning out, book with someone else. It’ll take a while to find a good fit.
Spend New Years with your animals. It’ll be nicer. Look at amazon for a lock for your room door and then also see if the university can accommodate a dorm for you in a vulnerable situation. Have a bag packed and ready in-case you need to leave at a moment’s notice. Basement apartments are not ideal but they’re cheap and can provide solace. Keep fighting.
About a year ago, one of my closest friends and I started flirting with the idea of committing to each other and starting a family in the future. We make a good team, we understand and empower each other. He later confessed that he had developed romantic feelings for me. I was getting the feels too, but reluctant to admit it. Shortly after, he started to reconnect with an old flame. He was upfront with me about it and our dynamic returned to being strictly platonic. Their relationship has been getting more and more serious, they're very much in love at this point. I want to be happy for him, but I feel jealous and bitter. I can't even engage in conversation with him. When he messages me it's to talk about world events or music or art, nothing inappropriate, but my responses are so terse and passive aggressive. I've known him for years, I never felt this way when he was in relationships in the past. His friendship is important to me, I want to remain friends for as long as possible, but I don't know how to get over these jealous feelings.
thank you anon, you’re really sweet. i wasn’t expecting any replies. thankfully i’m only home for a few more weeks and i’ve already got my bag packed (i never really unpack bc the environment is so unhealthy tbh). i’m at that weird age where i’m both an adult renting out an apartment in another city, but where i’m still young and unrooted enough that i’m expected to come home for the winter/summer every year (which is always traumatising in some way or another).
thank you for the encouragement wrt speaking to someone, too! it’s a difficult situation because i feel like i’ve both made it up and like i’m being overly dramatic and like nothing bad actually happened/the situation was totally normal, but something in my gut just tells me it wasn’t. i don’t know. it’s scary too because i feel guilty and anxious even talking about it on here anonymously, like the person who did it will find out somehow. i’m going to push to get help in the new year though, so hopefully i can manage to tell someone irl. thank you again, you’re really kind ♥
this is nowhere near the peak of his insanity. i don’t feel bad about my boobs at all, i never even gave them any thought until he entered my life and started mentioning it.
i think about strangling him to death every day
Scrote here. Small shapely breasts are the best. Your bf is retarded.(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
Please leave his ass, for your own good>>706226
You fucking ruined 2021, can you leave?
i want to but i basically cant. he has an unflattering picture of me that he holds as blackmail if i step out of line and not to mention the fact that he is willing to falsely and publicly accuse me of rape on facebook, a platform on which we share a lot of friends.
during one of our breakups, he outed me as an abuser and told everyone who would listen that i abused and controlled him.
i honestly am afraid of him and i’m still sort of in love with him so i just stay with him bf keep him at a distance which is surprisingly easy during this lockdown.
is the unflattering picture pornographic in nature? could you also attempt to get any of the things he says to you in video/audio/text messages or some other form of proof so you at least have something to fall back on (especially since i’m pretty sure you could go to the police about some of this stuff)? either way, i would really recommend still making a back-up plan for some point in the future, anon. you can’t stay with him and i think you know that too - he sounds scarily abusive
i have a friend who was in a really similar relationship to yourself, and she managed to use the pandemic to her advantage and got an apartment behind her boyfriends back - she moved away and ghosted him. i really can’t emphasise the need for a back-up plan he doesn’t know about. you can make new friends, you can move away, and it’s likely a lot of people can already tell he’s not quite right in the head. it’s not worth ruining yourself over such a mentally ill, evil fucking creep. i’m so sorry, he genuinely sounds so so so hellish.
i have an email where he says he will release details about the ‘unclear consent’ situation which we never had and had already falsely confided/implied to someone that i raped him.
because this email doesn’t explicitly threaten to falsely accuse me and instead words it as if i’m some sort of sex criminal, i’m not sure it could be used to show to police, and if i did, he could just tell police i’m a rapist and then i could be on the hook for that.
his mother is a lawyer and i’m afraid that she could not only help him prosecute me for ‘abuse’ which never happened, but she could falsely testify that i raped him seeing as i lived in her house.
he’s insane and i’m afraid of him. i also have very strong feelings for him and don’t want to disconnect completely. i also feel like it’s my fault because i’ve begged him to comeback to me so many times.
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I just sent my ex a paragraph about how abusive he was and immediiately blocked him. I know a lot of anons think stuff like that is futile but we were together as teens and at the time I had no idea I was being abused. It just feels good telling him I know what he did. My hands are also shakingj though..
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Me too. His music brought me a lot of relief when I was struggling to get through high school. Rip to a great one.
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I think I might have BDD. I just found a bunch of pictures of myself from when I was swimming 8 hours a week in high school and I remember how huge I felt then and how I'd buy clothes in a size or two too large because I didn't really understand what I looked like, and I have felt this shitty ever since no matter what weight I was at or how active I was. I've stopped swimming (it gave me massive anxiety attacks lol) and have like 10-20 pounds of extra fat on me and I just feel like a total sack of shit even though most people I know say I look fine. I'm like 175 lbs or so but I'm 5'8" so I don't really "look" overweight but I just feel so disgusted with myself.
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My sister and her bf just announced their engagement and even thought he's a decent dude and they're a very mature & smart couple I've spent the last 24 hours grieving because I feel like I'm losing my little sis
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i can't take customer service jobs because everybody is a fucking dick. when the customers are nice, the coworkers have to be bitches. when the coworkers are nice, the customers are assholes. i have not worked a single job in this branch that did not have a toxic ass environment. the people gossip about each other, the customers get pissy over anything. it's more stressful than it is worth it. i unironically like simple jobs like packing and cleaning better, but those only have shit shifts and tend to hire only men, or older women. i want to be cleaning a nice house again. it sucks that people treat cleaners like bottom of the barrel idiot scum. but if i keep it lowkey, and make sure to communicate well with employers it might just be okay. doing these jobs is was the main motivation to get my degree. i can not bear most of these petty people. can't wait to graduate and enjoy not having to break my back.
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I'm genuinely afraid that I'm developping selective mutism. I realized that I never ever talk when there is more than 2 persons listenning to me. Sometimes if I feel really anxious I can't even answer or look at my parents in the eyes. I have this deep rooted insecurity about the fact that I have nothing interesting to say, few years ago I would rehearse my sentence to the point that I will come across as robotic, and people would not be interested or simply cut me off. What fucks me up is that every time I really thought that what I had to say was helping the conversation but I realize that I was probably wrong. Now I think that everything I say is worthless and that I'm making people feel akward. I also can't read a room, one day I litteraly walk out of my classroom in front of the whole class because I genuinely though that the teacher had finished talking.
I have recently been accepted in an intership that I really wanted but they have accepted me by just looking at my art and a really messy 5 minutes zoom call when I stuttered like crazy. I'm so afraid that I will screw this amazing opportunity. I need to train myself to talk in front of more people.
sorry for rambling
Why did this have to be one of the first things that I read today? Damnit. I know they got rid of the tostada, but I didn't realize that they got rid of that too.
Why are fast food places taking so much shit off? They have to be raking in more money than some nations now, so why?
Someone who was in my social circle from like second grade to college (small town) trooned out a few years ago (FtM). I don't actually care that much about the transgender movement, but it really upsets me that this person was a fucking horrible abusive bully since we were in grade school, and now everyone, including my own family members, are just chalking all of that behavior to effects of ~*~trauma~*~ from being born in the wrong body. Fucking bullshit. This bitch bullied an overweight girl in our sixth grade class to the point of attempting suicide at fucking twelve-years old. When we were in high school, she gleefully told me about how she coerces the women she's seeing into having sex with her by threatening to never talk to them again if they don't comply. When we had sleepovers in elementary and middle school, she would sometimes wake me up in the middle of the night by shoving me out of bed, hitting me, screaming at me, etc. I'm not even someone who necessarily believes that all trans people are terrible and faking it for attention, but this one in particular is so fucking deranged it's terrifying, and I don't believe for a second that taking T has changed any of that.
I can't wait for some narc to come and defend that person/blame the victims
Thank you, anon.
I'm not sure if I'm depressed, but I'd try to look for help one day.
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Thank you for the encouragements! You guys are right I need to see talking as a skill that I can change and improve on, I still have a couple of months to get better and I will try my best! Thank you very much for your answers, I'm wishing you gals the best for this new year!
According to people who are still friends with her, she has supposedly calmed down a bit since taking T, but still has moments where she blows up and shows her true colors. The whole trans thing aside, she honestly just comes across as a toxic
person who, like all toxic
people who aren't actually capable of change, just learn to mask their behaviors better as they age.
It's because the never ending glut of violent, debasing pornography has made it common for the average male to be a misogynistic sexual sadist, and women have been groomed by the culture into thinking it's exciting and hot to be erotically brutalized. Any idiot should be able to admit this but mysteriously, it remains to be the most widely denied and obscured social issue in existence. >>706732>wtf are you on about??>I'm confused
You're either retarded or being deliberately obtuse.>>706751>kinkmeisha
>>706763>It's because the never ending glut of violent, debasing pornography has made it common for the average male to be a misogynistic sexual sadist
Porn alone didn't cause this. Misogynistic, sadistic impulses toward women would still have existed within these men whether or not violent porn were widely available. I'd argue what you're discussing is merely an extension of a bigger issue that typically begins in early childhood.
There is a difference between exercising a kink in a controlled, safe environment, and using that kink as an excuse to fuel abusive
tendencies toward women. The latter is absolutely a problem, but getting rid of porn entirely, or insisting that we label all "non-vanilla" kinks as bad and/or encouraging violence against women, is not going to solve much.
Just curious, how much CP and actual torture/abuse of trafficked women are you willing to ignore for the sake of your kinks?https://life.shared.com/mom-spots-adult-videos-of-missing-daughter-pornhub-snapchat
Can you guarantee you've never watched any of these 58 videos?
>>706785>beating the shit out of women
What do you mean, specifically? I don't personally consider something like spanking or flogging to be "beating the shit" out of someone, especially if the person is aroused by it and consented to such activity. If you're aroused by, for example, watching a video of a women being within an inch of her life and the context is clearly either non-consensual, or non-sexual, I think that goes beyond the scope of what should be considered appropriate in terms of a sexual kink, and is absolutely a cause for alarm. >>706787
What does any of this have to do with the post you're responding to? I said that getting rid of porn entirely isn't going to stop men from doing bad things to women, because the issue doesn't stem from the fact that porn exists.
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The fact that this is becoming "normal" is so sickening to me.
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I spent nearly the whole first day of 2021 on my ass reading lolcow. Fuck I'm gonna try and draw a picture after dinner or something
Porn is not the only reason, but it's part of the problem. It literally monetizes it.
So, why are you arguing with anons who point out it's bad? If you think there are merits that warrant defending it, go ahead and answer the two questions, so we can all know exactly where you stand.
NTA but actually there's a scientific reason to how being on the receiving end of pain can actually bring pleasure but very MILD pain like a spank on the butt.https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20151001-why-pain-feels-good#:~:text=The%20link%20between%20pleasure%20and,to%20induce%20feelings%20of%20euphoria
An anon implied that violent porn is the reason that it is supposedly more common these days for men to be sadistic and misogynist toward women. I disagreed that porn was the sole
reason for this, and explained my reasoning. I never even outright disagreed that porn was an issue. I don't think porn consumption, in general is a serious problem, but I am mostly against the use of porn currently
because the industry is so poorly regulated. Even with amateur porn, you almost never know for sure whether or not both parties consented to having the video uploaded. If there were some way of knowing for certain that nobody was hurt during the process, I'd say porn is like any other self-indulgent activity: it's fine in moderation.>>706800>Its mental illness
Considering most studies don't suggest that BDSM practitioners are any more or less mentally ill than the average person, I'd beg to differ. Why does it turn them on? I don't know. I don't think there's a consensus on why people like to combine pain with pleasure. Some claim that it's connected to some kind of abuse they suffered in early childhood, but other practitioners don't report any sort of abuse.
and rapey was once considered something you should be ashamed of and only do behind closed doors. Porn made it hot and anything else is vanilla.
Agreed. I remember my psychologically abusive
bf loved bdsm porn where the women would be crying. Men who are into that aren’t right in the head.
>>706816>Porn made it hot
What's with the belief people like this hold, that for all of human history everybody had exactly the same Normal Socially-Approved Sexual Tastes™ and that no one was ever attracted to something seen as Degenerate™ by their culture, until modern internet pornography was invented? And why do they think there wasn't pornography prior to the internet, or that people couldn't have been attracted to certain things that would later depicted in porn, before porn depicting it existed? There was a world before the internet, you know. There are museums dedicated to these kinds of artifacts, and with simple Google searches you can find historical archives of late 1800s BDSM, bondage, and spanking-themed erotic photography that was made solely for consumption.>>706819>Men have always been degenerates but in the past it was something to be ashamed of, now it's something to show
Pick one, anon. Either the misogynistic oppression and abuse of women was a prominent problem of the past that current progress towards women's liberation is attempting to change, or the misogynistic oppression and abuse of women was "totally shamed in the past but now it's normal and seen as cool!!". Do you sincerely, legitimately believe men used to treat women better, that men would reprimand other men for being sexist because it was "degenerate", that the routine subjugation of women and their rights wasn't commonplace in our violently patriarchal, puritanical, regressive past, and that when late 1990s internet porn came into existence it suddenly made men sexually aroused at the idea of hating women?
It seems common in discussions like these for there to be a significant amount of people who naively believe the reactionary mentality that there was any point in the past that was better for women than the present, and incorrectly correlating what they perceive the ills of society to be with modern inventions (like correlating pornography or erotic content with the internet and social media) despite those things existing long before the inventions they're attributed to. If you think porn is what causes sexism and want to go back to a false image of a "traditional" past, just become a /pol/cel. If not, learn to think about history and culture in a linear way, instead of interpreting everything that happens or has ever happened as a "specific to exactly my lifespan" thing.(enough)
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i don't know how to carry a conversation over text. i'm suffering. why can't males just be more interesting.
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i belive in you girl, be honest about it too, he should know exactly what kind of porn sick shit is wrong with him.
I didn't mention it because I figured it's one more thing I'll deal with in my imaginary future counselling but to be perfectly candid I'm scared of that too!! I just pray my husband would balance things personality wise; I know he has his own struggles but he seems to have had a better socialized childhood than my weird feral gloom so I can only hope.
>they have autism or some other issue, as bad as it sounds to say.
oh boy do I know what you mean. I have so much pre-guilt over the idea of potentially having a kid with developmental issues because I'm not sure I'd be able to handle it.
Stop thinking about it and forget the ted talk inserts catface
I wish I could help you but I’m a psychotic bitch so idk.
I've hit my husband in my sleep, and once tried to accidentally suffocate him with his blanket. Take this with a grain of salt, and I get why you're upset, but I wouldn't let something he did in his sleep affect your day.
To stay ot with thread, I'm tired of night terrors and other stupid sleep problems. I would take the trazadone prescribed for it, but trying to wake up from that stuff is like shaking yourself out of being stumble drunk
If he does it again you need to have a serious talk with him. Once is a reasonable accident (even though he's acting like a dumb crybaby bitch about it), twice is suspicious.
Even the "did I do stuff to you last night when you were asleep." is sus. Does he usually do stuff during his dreams? If not then why would he even think he could've done something just from a wet dream. Anyway, not trying to make you doubt your relationship, I hope your bf stops acting like a child.
He has once kicked me in his sleep before and put me in a headlock but that's it. I asked what he remembered and he only remembered part of it so I told him the rest and he started crying. About to tell him I don't want to have sex tonight so we'll see how that goes. >>707049
That's true, he's usually good with consent so I don't want to make a big deal out of nothing you know? Just really disconcerting waking up with a dick in your hand.
Even if he was just sleepassaulting or whatever you wanna call it, he should understand why you want some space and not get grumpy because he’s temporarily not getting sex. Him being grumpy to you
about the whole thing is the most concerning because it shows a huge lack of empathy.
How do you accidentally slip your dick in someone's hand while you're asleep, or slip their hand precisely on your dick? Both hands in their pants? Humping them instead of just a pillow or the blanket or something?
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>>707070>dude who sexually assaults someone in their sleep, knowing they have a history with a assault, makes it about himself>sulks, cries, and self harms in order to guilt the other person>"Next time I won't say anything"
I genuinely hope you reconsider this relationship anon. None of that is normal behavior. He needs professional help, not someone who won’t bring up problems because they’re too triggering
This just keeps getting worse.>My boyfriend assaults me in my sleep by making me grab his cock and putting me in a headlock >He starts crying and makes it about him when I confront him about it later>He self harmed so lol I guess I'm not going to bring it up to him anymore!>Oh right he has BPD and threatens to kill himself if I ever leave her
Anon, love yourself. BPDcunts won't kill themselves, I swear. They always
suicide bait but will never follow through so just either leave right now (the preferred option) or get him into therapy and don't get into his stupid games. Your life is too precious to be wasted in this loser.
Agreed. People with BPD are toxic
af to have relationships with, you will never be able to bring real issues up with them without them making it about themselves and doing the whole “woe is me” and making you feel like you’re in the wrong. BPD people are super nice because they do the whole love bombing but then switch and manipulate intentionally or not. Honestly it’s not worth the hassle, dump the unstable manbaby and if he threatens to an hero, call the police.
>>707101>they do the whole love bombing
Shit. I’m feeling down lately and think there’s something wrong with me but this is seriously concerning. No wonder my mom disowned me. I’m glad I’m isolating myself however.
And nah I’m not OP, I feel for her. Don’t know what to give advice for her though. I wish people would understand and respect consent.
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How do you let your pets get obese? Is it really so hard to keep them a healthy weight? Lacking the self control to keep yourself from getting fat is one thing, lacking the disipline for saying no to a child is another (still, not ok), but a pet is the easiest thing in the world to keep a healthy weight. Stop equating love with food you're killing the fucking animal you dumb bitch. Dont get mad at me when I passive aggressively tell you it's a shame theyre so unhappy and going to pass away in a few years. Side note : Its not an owo mega chonking chonker it's an unhealthy, unhappy, abused animal.
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i had a date with a girl that went really well (good chemistry, great sex, begging me to stay longer) and we have been messaging lots in the past few days being very flirty and we were supposed to be having another date this evening but she’s just texted me that she isn’t massively over her ex and doesn’t think it’s fair to me if i don’t want something casual which is fine with me and i told her that but it just came out the blue and she hasn’t answered my text…. now im panicking that there’s something wrong with me and i would rather she just be straight with me about it
feeling like picrel
You can only be diagnosed as having BPD by a qualified professional and often it can be mistaken for depression and bipolar. If you still feel like this you need to see a doctor/therapist/psychiatrist.
I think there’s a difference between being suicidal and suicidal bait. If your intention of telling people you feel suicidal is to manipulate them in to staying with you or other things as a means to an end then this is toxic
(doesn’t always mean you are evil or bad but need help, and others should not have to be manipulated in to complying with the demands and can walk away) If it’s because you feel like you actually need help and not to gain something from the person you’re telling then that doesn’t make you a bad person, but equally for both you need professional help.
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aaahh my bf always goes to the toilet seconds before I'm about to go and then keeps it occupied for at least 30 minutes no joke
then when I finally get to go I can't because I have to wait for the smell to go away
he's on there right now what the hell is he even doing for this long rreeee
I gotta say I don't really understand tipping culture as a whole. I live in a country where tipping isn't much of a thing. If you eat out at a restaurant and have a good time it's appreciated if you round up your bill by a couple euros, going from 47 to 50 or something, but it's never expected of you. Obviously if I'd visit the US I'd be mindful of tipping, but I've heard so many different stories on how exactly it works.
Do restaurant owners just not pay their workers minimum wage? If so, how is that allowed? If tips are just a bonus on top of a normal wage you'd get elsewhere, I can understand how people think it's entitled to always expect a tip of a certain percentage. I've also heard stories about the tipping thing causing huge inequalities in wages just because some servers work in better timeslots or restaurant sections than others. And that way, servers get all the extra money while kitchen staff get nothing. Is it common for US restaurants to pool all tips and distribute them equally across staff? Because that's how it's mostly done where I live.
Sorry for all the questions, just kind of baffled by this phenomenon.
Thanks for the explanations. How about deliveries or fast food? I've heard that it's common to tip your pizza delivery guy but I don't think I've ever heard about tipping fast food chain employees. Do delivery people also get a lower minimum wage with the expectation of it being topped up with tips?
To me it just seems strange to have these sort of arbitrary standards for what the tip percentage should be. If you eat at an expensive restaurant that doesn't mean the servers have to work harder than at a cheap one. So generally the tip is something you have to keep in mind before ordering something, knowing that the dish is going to be ~20% more expensive in practice? Similar to estimating the added tax before buying something in a store (which is also something I only recently discovered they do in the US)?
In America, servers are legally allowed to be paid significantly less than normal minimum wage (like less than half of it) because customers are very much expected to tip. The standard tip is 20% for good service, 15% is considered the minimum you should give if the server is decent. 25% if you make them do a lot more work than normal. The vast majority of people in the USA understand that, like it or not, tipping is a responsibility you sign up for when you eat at a table service restaurant in America. However, there's some degenerates out there that will happily get table service then refuse to tip.
>I've also heard stories about the tipping thing causing huge inequalities in wages just because some servers work in better timeslots or restaurant sections than others.
Yes. The better/more experienced servers tend to get the more busy (IE more lucrative) shifts and sections. In all fairness, these require much harder work, so it makes sense they would get more money.
>And that way, servers get all the extra money while kitchen staff get nothing. Is it common for US restaurants to pool all tips and distribute them equally across staff? Because that's how it's mostly done where I live.
Different restaurants do it differently, but usually cooks don't get any tips because their full wage is paid by the restaurant. At most places I worked servers end up making way more money than cooks, which I don't think is fair, because even though cooking is a lot easier than serving it is a lot more dangerous.
>>707154>How about deliveries or fast food?
Delivery drivers also get paid less than minimum wage and expect tips. You aren't expected to tip fast food employees, though.
>So generally the tip is something you have to keep in mind before ordering something, knowing that the dish is going to be ~20% more expensive in practice? Similar to estimating the added tax before buying something in a store (which is also something I only recently discovered they do in the US)?
Is public self loathing venting on lolcow? What do you mean by self loathing in public? Halp>>707114
Everyone keeps telling me that but what’s the reason professionals don’t help me and just let me ramble (coz i’m nervous and dunno what else to do there i’m clueless) ?
What can they even do? They neglected me when I were a kid and even more as an adult? Help me fix myself pls by explaining to me what psychologists can even do for me and how I can ask for help even if it’s not bpd?
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brain fog is killing me, i literally feel like a dead man walking. feel like i could just fall asleep at any time, other people can tell because i get confused and make tiny mistakes all of the fucking time. only thing that helps somewhat is exercise but the effect fades quickly
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Dead "man" walking, you say?
this is such a brain-dead take. trauma that happens to people in their formative years (and trauma is very common among people that have had to grow up poor, with drunk and broke parents constantly pissed off about being drunk and poor and seeing children as "crumbsnatchers" or a waste of space/money rather than children) isn't something that just deletes itself once they turn 18. it's shit that affects every single thing you do throughout your entire life
plus there's the whole deal that life isn't, and has never exactly been kind nor fair to poor people…damn bitch get some empathy lmao no wonder people hate you irl
You don't want to romanticize opioids, anon. Learn from Luna Slater. It's a slippery slope.>if I can't reliably numb myself
The key word here is reliably, because you can't. Think of it like this: unless you can somehow literally stay high 24/7, which is impossible, the shitty feeling is just going to be that much more intense whenever you're not on it. In the end, it's still the same amount of shit, just portioned differently. Equal exchange and all that.
Then soon enough you'll develop a tolerance and your usual dose makes you feel just as shitty as you do now, except if you take nothing you feel twice as shit. So you'll have to up the dose to keep the numbing going. You have to keep periodically upping your dose, and eventually you'll arrive at the highest dose you could physically (or financially) handle. Except after some time that too means you feel just as bad as you did before. At this point you're effectively held hostage by the drug: your only choices are continuing at that highest dose, which doesn't even make you feel better than you do now, or taking less and making life a living hell.
So you keep taking the drugs because it's the only way to keep you from feeling even worse, instead of it making you feel better. Then you laugh at your former self because you understand that you actively turned the feeling you wanted to get away from into the best feeling you're capable of anymore.>better an addict than dead, right?
The former will seal your fate of the latter.
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damn that's awful and really childish anon. I don't want to judge too much if this is really impacting your mental health but distancing yourself from her won't change the root of the problem. You really need to stop seeing women as competitors especially for something so shallow as looks. The only people who are benefiting from competion between women are men. You can be better than that and I'm sure that you are not nearly as unattratctive than what you think you are if you are putting all that efforts into your look. If your friend is beautiful without trying then good for her !
Also is she a good friend ? Because if she is what you are doing is really shitty and she probably won't understand why you are acting like that.
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WHAT THE EVERLASTING FUCK??? HOW THE FUCK IS THIS LEGAL!?!?
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I have nothing specific to say I just feel sad I hope we all can feel better.
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Today at work a woman came in with 8 industrial sized duffel bags that each weighed 50lbs+ as well as 4 other smaller suitcases, made me lift and wrap every single one by myself, paid over $1k for shipping and didn’t leave even a single fucking cent as a tip. It’s 2am and I’m still fuming over it, can’t sleep because of the back pain it caused.
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Samefag cause of editing
My fucking loser of a brother phoned me on NYE. He was obviously on drugs (which I dont have issues with) and it was all he wanted to talk about. He did MKAT that night, but he also wanted to talk about other times that he did other drugs. Really humble-bragging like, as if I would be impressed. He used to be a neckbeard and would not fit in with the cool kids, so I think he tries to compensate now (he is 29 years old, jobless). It is pathetic. We are both way past the time where drug use is something to brag about. Besides, people that do them dont brag about it to the extent he was doing it. Every time I would try to change the topic, he tried to steer it back. And fuckibg MKAT? He tried to paint it to me like some cool drug that all the kids are doing, but I have experience with it myself (as I am a casual drug user, but he would NEVER hear that from me) so I kept shutting him down.
He also talks the same way about women he fucked (teenagers mostly, because an adult woman would never touch him) but he does not call them women, just "pieces of ass" (I know, cringe). He once expressed to me his desire to fuck my godmother, cause she "still got it".
I cant stand his poser ways. I miss my brother.
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my partners ex trying to message them. like bitch havent you done enough damage? its been almost two years, fuck off. ill fuckin fight
The real advantage is being introduced to the concepts of saving and making rational decisions, knowing what a functional relationship looks like etc. I had the same advantage, parents were fairly high wage earners who lived below their means and saved a bunch. My primary role models had good traits i could latch onto without having to think too hard about.
But I do take some issue with the amount of 'poor people' who live their lives pay check to pay check blaming the world without trying to improve their situation. Boomers having it easier and you being financially irresponsible are not mutually exclusive things. But i guess i also struggle to empathise with people who have never had to think hard about stretching a dollar.
It just kills me inside when i'm making myself homecooked meals for $1.50 - $4 while people are eating out for minimum $15 and they complain about being poor. Like i earned 40% less then what they earned and I was still doing well on savings. It just seems like every time the discussions of finance comes into orbit the information is either ignored or rejected out of insecurity to protect whatever miniscule amount of pride they have left.
Anyway, i'm pretty much done with people who blame their financial situation on whatever they want. Too much negativity and the friends i've made who are working towards financial security are more interesting and enjoyable to hang out with. Still a couple of people i am hoping will change but i'm over people who are unwilling to improve their situation. I don't want to be dragged down to thinking their level of mediocrity is acceptable.
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The difference between a 5'4 girl and a 5'9 girl of the same age when it comes to calorie intake is about 200 calories.
I recommend reading this:https://health.usnews.com/health-news/blogs/eat-run/articles/2016-06-14/who-actually-needs-a-2-000-calorie-diet
The 2,000 calorie thing isn't normal at all. "Moderate activity" only needs 2000 calories to maintain weight if by "moderate" you mean "very active", or if you're talking about a tall man. For other people, 1500-1800 calories is maintenance unless they're fat and trying to maintain it.
How is it moralising? Chill out. An “unspecified normal weight” is subjective and amorphous, making the argument kind of pointless here, and 1200 calories would result in slow to moderate weight loss for an average woman, or be complete maintenance if they’re completely sedentary (unless they are tall, like I said before).
I don’t know how my post about tall people being able to eat more caused this mess lol
I don't even have a foreign accent yet other americans still pick on my american accent cause hurr it's from a different part of our country and like SO FUNNY!
It sucks but people are idiots. It's not a reflection on you.
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I am becoming a hoarder. It started with being disorganized after a move in september and now I really do be living with huge piles of stuff in every corner of my house I wanna die and I can’t seem to figure out how to problem solve and clean it myself. Like I manage, I pick through the piles for what I need but it takes so much longer and I feel like I can’t have anyone over I know because I feel so ashamed so I just sit here in my piles of stuff. I’m in therapy twice a week and we’ve talked circles around this issue and tbh idk if it’s my therapist or me or both but I am not making any progress. Like I’m so close to hiring a professional organizer. But I also know that wouldn’t solve my disorganized habits. And I’m afraid it’s gotten filthy under the piles because I Only clean the center of the room, so that’s embarrassing and again I wanna die and feel trapped
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My roommate's cat is cute as fuck but she keeps chasing me to grab my feet when I pass by like they're toys, sometimes with her claws.
Most anons usually just say it doesn’t suit the cow
not that whatever features they have are inherently ugly and that everyone should look like some celebrity.
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So uhhh samefag anon from the vent where i said im insecure about venting because of mocking etc.
Im really trying i think im at my limit. My boyfriend is berating me today, because he wanted to look in my email for some reason and he found tons of spam from wish. That email is pretty old and my wish account was when i was a small kid.
I forgot the password to it so i get daily spammed from that site, and he saw that they spammed "recommended" me sex toys even tho im asexual and really repulsive towards sexual things, i dont even buy sex toys or want them. Hes now saying that i look at dirty stuff and doing this behind his back which i do not and i know im not.
Now hes telling me to explain to him why wish is sending me these spam mails and if i dont he will leave me and its making me confused and also panic alot. i even dropped my energy drink on accident over my whole keyboard and drawing tablet and it literally made me shed tears and make me go into a much much more terrible mood than i was before.
Was called pathetic too by him because i apparently just staged that and told me im over reacting and just acting when in reality when i have anxiety my emotions just tend to go very very wild. He knows that, he also has anxiety so i thought he would show some compassion.
I know hes loving,but something in him changed today im not sure what and its making me scared anons, i really dont wanna lose him, we are 3 years into this relationship, it is going great, we do have some bumpy roads sometimes but they get worked out fairly quickly. today just feels off.
Im also scared that i might hurt myself or others im really thinking about going to my mother and asking her to call the hospital. Im really just feeling like garabge right now.
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Urgh anon I am so sorry that this is happening to you.
Who the fuck cares about what emails you get from shitty online stores, it sounds like he wanted to start a fight over nothing to make you feel lesser than him. Someone "loving" doesn't do this. Miss me with that shit.
Ultimately you do what you want, but I strongly
recommend dumping his weenie ass.
Yeah, im trying to explain to him why its recommended to me it even says "that could interest you" meaning they are recommending me weird shit that i dont even need or want like a youtube add or video recommendation.
The emails even say "2020" and he asks why they are from 2020 when i said to him that its because i cant access that account so i get spammed obviously, unless i delete my wish account so i wont get spammed.
It irritates me, and frankly it does give me a headache. I just feel so controlled and misunderstood by him and like he doesnt wanna hear me out, says im lying when i actually tell the truth and dont even change up what i say. Threatens to leave me if i dont tell him what he wants to hear, which mind you makes me scared because i got left and ghosted ALOT back then which fucks with my mind and makes me feel like shit.
i just feel so unappreciated by him right now and it hurts.
Huh, why would he even overreact like this? I mean, you can still tell him to set up a fake email and wish account so he can see for himself how much he gets spammed with the most random items? I mean for fucks sake, wish is notorious for their crack pipe and fake silicone feet ads (just to name a few examples).
But yeah, him being such a massive pissbaby is just bizarre behavior.
i am asexual, i dont really want to be sexual with him, never will be since of some pretty disturbing stuff i witnessed as a child and had to go through so its completely out of my book. He told me he is asexual too but he does alot of sexual jokes or comments on my thighs or butt which sometimes i just brush off because im not interested in sexual things.
anyway, bigger problems came, hes doing drugs apparently, he said it isnt a "bad" drug hes taking but it apparently makes him more calm or something. I'll just take care of that for a while.
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I have no link to "my" culture whatsoever. I genuinely feel like I'm completely alien from people in my country.
I look at their interests, local politics and celebrities, the fashion and aesthetics, and there is just NO APPEAL WHATSOEVER. Maybe my brain has been rotted from too much isolation (thanks mom & dad) and foreign media all my fucking life. I don't care about anything here, and trying to care feels like giving myself homework. I'm in my own little world. I don't even like going outside. The scenery would be beautiful if there wasn't so much trash littering the place. Fine, it's not a first world country, but why must there be plastic wrappers and other garbage everywhere, marring the beauty of nature? Why are you blasting loud fucking music and some shitty preacher when it's already too hot outside for such bullshit, or when it's a beautiful, peaceful afternoon that's better off quiet? Why are you selling raw dead animals on the street as meat, holding up their corpses? Don't you know that can spread disease? Why are so many things caked in dirt and mud and shit? Can't you keep anything clean? Why doesn't anyone care? Why are there open fucking sewers? Why are some people pissing and shitting in the streets like animals? You are not stupid, you are not subhuman, stop acting like you are.
People constantly think I'm a foreigner just by my appearance, and I've even talked like one ever since I was a child because I learned to speak from my stupid expat dad and foreign media. I was never taught what's meant to be my native tongue, and I genuinely don't have the motivation to learn now. I have been here for years, I have never integrated, and I probably never will.
What if the fucking transracial shit is true? I don't feel like I fit in anywhere. Maybe I should just illegally immigrate, change my appearance and make up a fake backstory for myself. Fucking identity crisis.
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i fucking miss dunking on holly brown. apart of me wishes she can her act together with youtube and shit because dunking on her nowadays feels so lame and depressing
This year has been shit so far, mainly because my mom has been horrible to my family. She ruined New Years over some small stupid thing, and has taken to her bed for the last three days. She’s so manipulative, was completely in the wrong in this situation, and yet expects everyone to come crawling to her apologising. The atmosphere of the house is dictated by whatever fragile mood she’s in, and I’m so sick of it.
It’s so hurtful how she can’t realise how it’s always her that starts arguments and fights, and she point blank refuses to apologise first. Even when’s it’s got to the point where we’re fighting, I’m sobbing and hiccuping and shit, I’m ALWAYS the one who’s had to make the peace and say sorry first.
It feels like a curse, we had a lovely Christmas, therefore she’s stored up enough energy to become an insaniac at new year and spoil everything. There’s no winning.
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I miss 90's couture. Couture these days is so boring, it's like the goal today is just to look expensive and the artistic part has been forgotten. Even Iris van Herpen is starting to get boring
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This happens to my bff so much, I don’t even know why, she tells me I’m the only one who actually listens to her and I’m like why, how does that even happen
but it’s the truth.
She could have a solution for an issue at work but no one will listen to her, she could also have something interesting to say about some topic and people will ignore her even though they want to hang out with her????
it’s fucking annoying and I’m not even the person going through that shit.
I’m so sorry this is happening to you, anon. I truly wish there was a way to change that, but I honestly think that people are just fucking disgusting, it’s like they target a nice and quiet person to use them as some sort of dummy to vent their frustrations on them or something? I don’t even know.
It has a CSS option that mimics lolcow. I think it’s called laughing bovine ranch or something like that.
I tried to get into it once but I feel like it’s too obsessed with politics and social issues. I don’t care about that stuff, I wanna talk about the coziest blankets and complain about when farts get trapped in your vagina.
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>add guy on /soc/ femdom thread
>get along great, have lots in common ect
>send my pic, he loves it i’m so qt etc
>he sends his pic
when will i learn my lesson and stop being so desperate and pathetic online. oh well, such is the life of a mentalcel online.
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My parents just got ready to go out, but haven't invited me along, only asked me when they were already in winter coats and I didn't want to make them wait. Now I'm beating myself over it and crying, because I did want to go out. Why am I so retarded? I'm always more worried about causing inconvenience than getting what I want or need.
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That sucks so much! The worst part is that when you treat them the same, they think you’re the crazy one.
I actually got so mad one day that I started doing exactly what they were doing to my friend, I only said hi to her in front of them, I would ignore whatever they said and ask for my friend for more information on anything she was saying, I would also be like ah, okay so, what were you saying?
But what happened? some bitch
had the audacity to ask>anon, are you mad at me?
Like, what the fuck? I’m doing exactly what they have been doing to my friend and it’s like they didn’t even know?
If it wasn’t for my friend that asked for me to stop, I would have told her that I was being just like how they are around my bff, but I didn’t have the courage.
Awww poor anon, are you me?
Stop beating yourself up over this for starters. Sounds like you could use some more self-confidence and being angry at yourself isnt gonna help.
I'm sure your parents love you and they wouldnt ask you if they didnt want to wait. I find it hard too but when someone aks you "do you want this" you have to answer what YOU want an not what you think someone else wants. You dont know if your parents would mind waiting and you dont have to know. I'll tell you waht everyone tells me….stop trying to think what other people think!!! Oh and try to get more self-confidence (if you figure out how, tell me)
And dont be angry at yourself anymore, instead learn from this so that next time, you're doing what you want instead of trying not to be an inconvenience to anyone.
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Anon, same. Let's you and me escape to another country. I've always felt like an alien in my own country. It's tiresome and lonely not being able to connect to your own culture. You try your very best to be with your own people but you just can't because deep inside your heart you know there's a better culture/country out there that fits with your mindset/behaviour more.
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I just want a boyfriend who looks at me weird when I use internet lingo.
Nothing to do about that but wait and suffer. Set your clock to when its the next time to take your pain killers so you'll be in time.
You can do this anon, the worst is over.
Might advice for some other pain killers in the future. I personally love nerufen fastcaps (based on ibuprofen) or perdolan femina (also ibuprofen baded, specially made for monthly cramps as the name suggests)
Ofcourse I have no idea what medicine is possible in your country but you can always ask your apothecary. (I once just straight up told her I have very very heavy cramps, please help me)
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I took it the second i woke up, managed to go to the bathroom and wash my face then the hellshow started. I have a bad tendency to bleed profusely with other medication than this but I appreciate the advice, some other anons may get something out of it! I am already feeling loopier and under a heated blanket, gonna roast the pain out of me
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Awh that sucks. Any chance your doctor can give you some faster working pain killers?
I wish you good luck! Take good care of yourself and relax a bit. Tomorrow will be better.
I am this close to "misgendering" my troon friends and losing what few friends I have because I'm so tired of the obnoxious mtfs wanting to wear my skin>>708176
. You and me both.>>707974
I might be a lil late, but holy shit. I posted something like this a few times on some threads on /ot/ and I understand you, believe me. I have some friends who also just feel like an alien where we live, so you're definitely not alone. I can't say i'm not completely to blame for isolating myself from my country's culture, but damn it, i've always felt i'd truly be myself if i just moved to a different place (where people speak in the language im more comfortable speaking). We just need to wait it out until the borders open, and get to where we need to be, because im assuming you've already given up at re-integrating.
We'll make it someday, anon, just you wait.
Anon, I laughed, i am sorry that your dog is a perv, but I could not help myself.
Just tell people what to expect, it's a dog, behaviour like that is not going to make you seem weird, dogs are animals and do not behave like people. Make it into a joke, tell people you suspect Fido has a foot fetish, I promise you it is really funny.
Old fart here (34)
I spend my 20s being depressed because of undiagnosed autism. Now I'm making up for it by finishing my studies in combination with work and its going great. It's never too late, you guys are still very young.
It gets better as you age, trust me. Taking to a therapist might help too. Just don't give up.
not that it's any consolation, but everything is going to be fucked for the next decade or so. If the vaccine timetable can be met - which I wouldn't usually be confident of because these targets never are met, but given how important it is - and those four groups are done by February, then covid deaths should drop off massively, since it's them doing all the dying.
It's been a shit year that has torpedoed my masters AND the industry I'm hoping for a career in, I just want it over too.
You will most likely be assessed through teacher assessment/coursework or other means that your college/sixth form decides:
- Get your target grades in any coursework (make it stand out if you can, go the extra mile)
- Again, with homework, try your best
- Show your teachers your best effort in zoom lessons and communication with them. If you don't get the content, make such to ask for help (and prove your dedication through your progress)
- Attend all online lessons and complete all homework/assigments
- Make a realistic timetable for yourself (include breaks and I don't recommend studying late)
There will likely been no formal exams, but content you learn will be helpful in other assessment areas, as well as in Uni.
Lastly, and most importantly, take care of your mental health and try to have a positive outlook. You're doing a-levels in the worst time, you have a goal of going to university and I'm sure you are interested/passionate about a subject, that in itself is something to be proud of. Also, it helps to know lots of kids are in the same boat and no one will look at your co-hort negatively - the provision for learning has not been great. If you feel you haven't done so well so far, there is MONTHS to change that (and lockdown will end way before that so more in-person learning at school). It's awful not feeling in control of our future, but you can't control what happens with covid, but you can control what you do in this (abeit terrible) circumstance. Learn at your own pace, but again, do all homework/assignments and attend all online class.
Sorry for rambling, I believe in you anon!
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I wish we were ruled by an AI already. Pretty sure she'll castrate 99% of scrotes.
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after being a full time student, i decided to go on a semester break since transferring was weird and because i think i needed it. i decided to apply for some shop opening nearby and i think im excited. i would like to start 2021 doing something instead of sitting around playing games. i'm just worried about working with creeps again. my last job had so many disgusting scrotes and i got sexual harassed by one in specific. i ended up leaving that job and moving to a different city because of it. after that, i just dedicated my time to school fully. hoping for better changes in 2021.
i hate myself too much and have shit genetics so even working out wouldnt help that much. if i was ever posted to lolcow id be dubbed the ultimate fridge waist. i look really masculine without a lot of makeup on and clothes to hide my figure.
i wish i had an odd face. i think having an interesting face would be better than to be plain.
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People always sperg about returning your cart to the cart corral after you finish shopping like it's the greatest evil to leave your cart sitting around, yes you should return it obviously, but I grab carts all the time at work and one billion percent more annoying than people leaving their carts wherever they want is people who fucking saunter around the parking lot and cross the street without looking, and then get mad at ME when they nearly stumble into my row of carts that I'm pushing inside. Especially when they say "um you could have stopped" like no bitch actually I couldn't have?? Like jesus christ have some common sense, you can stop walking and move out of the way faster than I can stop this row of seven carts, there's only so much I can do when you aren't paying attention to where you're walking! The worst are people who literally cross the crosswalk without looking up from their phone AT ALL and nearly stumble into me and then act all huffy about it. Smh I love volunteering to bring in carts when the cart dude isn't in yet because it's nice and vigorous and I get some fresh air but I swear people do this shit on purpose to be cute or something.
The moment I get home after going somewhere else for a few days after having a fight with my psycho sister where she started punching and hitting me and then I retaliated, then proceeded to punch me out when I escaped somewhere else two hours later and tried to come back and resolve it, she starts bitching at me again about how I'm a horrible person and how she doesn't want to be around me and that she feels so ~victimized~ that I slapped her in retaliation for her hitting me the first time. Frame yourself as the victim all you want, you power tripping narcissistic psychopath, it isn't going to make you capable of empathy. If you're just going to get into another fight that results in more physical injury, nobody cares anyway. But since she's the "preferred" child and the one who's never gotten proper psych help or meds, as well as younger than me my parents treat this cunt like a saint. One day karma will come for her ass, I know it. There's no repairing this relationship at this rate, she has said and done too much. My father really is insistent "you can forgive her verbally berating you, putting down your degree and profession, comparing you to a serial killer, and calling you a basement dwelling loser!". No faggot, I can't. And moreover my faggot parents not being the ones who'll let me move out when they let this terror move out at 19 is beyond me, but I guess she's good at keeping her abusive rage capped for all but one person. And that person happens to be me. I spent five years of my life living with a different parent and I don't care once I move out if I don't see her for many more beyond five years. She's said and done too much shit for it to be forgivable. I regret not trying to help and be a better sibling earlier on but I'm not gonna be friendly to whatever psychopath in my sisters skin she's becoming because this thing isn't even the sister from my childhood I remember (didn't even like her that much, but she didn't try and give me literal ass whoopings). Fuck my family, they're all awful people and I'm leaving them behind within the next couple years for facilitating this and my mom and dad for additionally abusing me. Anything has to be better than this. But for now I don't feel safe in my own house for another few days before this bitch goes back to uni where she can gladly live away with no parents while I'm stuck here
Im watching "abducted in plain sight" it's about an guy abducting a little girl of a family he's friends with. This shit is making me so fucking mad.
Firstly, the PARENTS allowed this man who just said he was molested by his aunt at 4 to sleep in their underaged daughter's bed and listen to these weird tape for "treatment" because his therapists recommended it, then both the MOM and DAD admit that they'd were both had sexual contact with the man.
The mom said that he'd given her compliments and ended up kissing him and the dad said that he'd told him he needed "relief" and the dad jerked him off in a car. Both tried to make themselves look like these huge victims of this man in these sexual accounters.
Then he takes their daughter horseback riding, he's gone for DAYS before they call the police. Then they get a call from him eventually saying he's in mexico and he wants to marry their 12 year old daughter, thats the only way he's coming back.
His brother was the one who got the molester caught. The guy had raped and grooomed the daughter into thinking she was an alien and they had a "mission" and if they didn't solve it bad things would happen to her & her family.
She gets saved, but lies for the guy, the doctors say her hymen wasn't broken (she said she was raped in present day) and then she goes back to school.
They tell the parents to have NO contact with the Molesters wife or kids, but what do they do? The
molesters wife comes in on Christmas like, "If you don't get my husband out of jail, then I'm going to tell everyone you fucked my husband"basically.
So the parents decide to get the molester out of jail to protect their "secret", so tell me why the molester calls, the mom speaks with him, he tells her he'd tell her what happened, and she meets with him and THEY HAVE SEX.
She fucks a man who kidnapped her daughter, whose a pedophile who told her he wants to marry her daughter.
I'm not done with the documentary but i'm so fucking disgusted. Her parents have to be the dumbest people alive.
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Anons…thank you. I didn't think anyone else would relate to my dumb vent. Feels good to know I'm not alone with this. I hope for the best for all of us
and then the molester TELLS the dad after they fucked and she said she was in a sexual relationship with the molester for 8 months, reminder this dude JUST kidnapped her daughter and said he wanted to mary her and the mom goes on to fuck him.
And she says she was in love with the kidnapper/rapist/pedo, you cannot make this shit up. They failed their daughter on all levels.
I've seen that documentary. It's one of the most fucked up things I've ever watched.
I honestly think the father purposely handed off his daughter and wife to the man. It was all some fucked up fetish "play" they were doing that resulted in trauma for the child, and they're passing it off as "Oh we were all victims
of this great manipulator". No.
Just the way the mother even describes him and moments with him fondly, and slightly sounds jealous of her daughter is horrifying.
and then they STILL LET HIM SEE HER, they are fucking retarded the mom's like, "he says she's going to hitch hike, if I don't let her go what do I do?" and she lets him SEE HER.
I'm starting to believe they were getting money or something from it, you cannot be this fucking retarded.
I'm not done but i'm so fucking upset, I've never seen this shit before, then they have the nerve to sit on camera and speak on it like it was nothing.
They act so fucking helpless, even the dad was like "You'll regret sending her" as if he has ZERO control, then the recording and pictures i feel so bad for her.
All the adults were shitty and even the brother was like, "they were happy" and kind of brushed off the fact he was fucking a little girl.
whether or not you can remember saying no you were clearly too drunk to consent. it is NOT YOUR FAULT. it doesn't matter that you were drinking, you did NOT deserve it or ask for it.
please please go to a clinic and at least get checked up physically for your peace of mind. and they can connect you with someone to talk to even if you don't want to right now. it's okay not to tell your friends if you feel that they'll just make it worse by not supporting you. you need to do the things that will make you BE safe and FEEL safe, and genuinely anyone who blames you can rot in hell.
i'm sorry this happened. you will get through this.
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(my english is shit, sorry) I fucking hate you asshole, i feel sick everytime i have to call you "grandpa", you're a fucking monster, you're trash and i hope you rot in hell forever, stop calling me "honey" and "sweetie" like you didn't beat and abuse my grandma in front on me for years, and now like it wasn't enough that other absolute bitch i've to call "mom" brought you to our house IN FUCKING NEW YEAR EVE and now you're fighting with everyone and pissing on MY bathroom every night and our house smells like shit, if i could kick you out i absolutely would i don't have empathy for literal criminals, stop bringing pain to my family and chaos to our lives. I'm sorry grandma, every time i think on what they did to you i feel the deepest pain and regret, i couldn't do nothing, i was just 12yo…i couldn't even fight them, i want you to know that i will never forgive him and i actively want him to die, i'm on your side and i'll defend your honor from anyone who dares shit talk about you, you didn't deserve nothing that happened to you, you were an angel. Rest in peace, now you're free.
Sorry. I’m not sure why I’m even pitching a bitch about it but he just keeps going on and on about wanting kids and I just want no part of it whatsoever and he knows this too and I think I’ve reached my limit with the whole thing, maybe with him too
I just want a quiet life with a pet cat and my future husband but he’s one of those people who thinks having kids will solve everything. No thank you
it was frankly my idea first since we were a LDR for so long and we've been together since we were teenagers without like any physical contact for years at a time but when i MOVED here i told him i wanted to be monogamous (we never even acted poly anyway, at most i flirted with guys i knew and that was it and he didn't do anything with anyone else while we were apart as far as i know) and he agreed to that
until he fell for a troon we both know l m a o
i know part of it is my fault for getting the idea out there to begin with and i haven't brought it up since, since we were talking about being a group for a while but now its like i'm the only one who's not okay with it and its just a lot, sorry for the sperg lmfao
but i should bring it up again since its been such a long relationship and mostly quite good, i don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water, you know? its just frustrating because i know both of them are gonna act like me changing my mind before we get too far into this is ruining their lives but like, i didn't really agree to this!! i'm your wife, like pay attention to me!!
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would u forgive ur mom for allowing bad things to happen to u as a kid even though u had told her about it but all she did was make jokes about u and him being married and him being your husband etc she apologized to me sometime ago and she was crying and looked really sad and i forgave her fwiw and i feel like i shouldnt so easily but it didnt really felt worth it to feel hate for her and to keep negative feelings in my heart for her
it was after, so it was technically emotionally cheating but at this point I'm so annoyed with the other shit that even that doesn't really bug me much, I just want it to go back to how it was when it was just us
thanks for hearing me out anon, I'm nervous to even bring it up w my close friends because I hate looking like a dumbass who let this happen so I've just been bottling it up
>>708593>kpop pic>types like a 12 year old
I mean it’s a vent thread but still.
Yeah you should forgive everyone because it’s an 18+ thing to do. Sorry that she made fun of you but still.
Could you say that you’re not okay with it because of the emotional cheating? I mean if you were in a monogamous relationship at that point and not poly he really can’t pull that card on you. That sort of mentality is the reason why men got away with raping their wives for so long - consenting to something once does not mean you have to consent forever.
To be honest I would be so turned off by all of this I’d leave. Sounds like he might be gaslighting and/or guilt tripping you, which is gross. Tell him you’ve changed your mind and if he doesn’t choose you, his wife, then leave because he doesn’t deserve you. Poly relationships only work if everyone involved is consenting and happy. You’re not, and it’s not your job to put up and shut up for a man and some troon.
Also the fact you’re questioning if you’re a lesbian should make you consider leaving too. If you’re a lesbian, you’re not attracted to men, so you shouldn’t be with a man.
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>found out family owns land by the sea side
>think about selling it so I might have a better life
>find out the shit is in the middle of nowhere and no on really wants it
Please kill me…
I was a neet for a long time, friend. In 2018 I was certain there was no more hope for me.
It's quite what happened last year, a LOT of people lost their jobs. I think your reaction is only normal. You gonna get through this, but you must seek some help
Why do you even engage the discussion with a hopeless freak? You two both are boring mortals and won’t change a thing. Either unfriend him and keep yourself to your own circles or shaddup and be a subhuman like him.>>708876>implying
She’s debating politics and serious problems with some 4chan loser so do the maths
Hmm, we've just been friends for so many years and I suppose I thought he'd be different since his sexuality leans more towards gay. But it turns out even men who don't want to fuck women have the same opinions about them, I guess>Either unfriend him and keep yourself to your own circles or shaddup and be a subhuman like him
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I’ve been on hold for 30 minutes
I just leased my car using this tactic:
Submit interest leads through the dealerships website using my email. The dealerships email back pretty much immediately. I then asked them to run numbers on the precise model I wanted (supplying my income and credit score). They sent me their offers and I compared them. Then I used two competing offers to get an even better deal.
I made sure to get the rep to agree to the terms in writing. Got my insurance, showed up to the dealership to sign papers, and drove away in 45 mins.
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tell him that engels was a terf
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This isn't really a vent, but I'm not sure where else to write this. I think I just realized that I've had a really bad habit of overcommitting to certain friendships and then becoming exhausted once I have to deal with all of the emotional labor. The reason it took me this long to understand is because the exhaustion comes in years later once the initial feeling wears off of me being excited that someone is so close to me and understands me so well. I guess in my childhood/as a teenager I was always so lonely and wished for one of those inseparable friendships where we understood everything about each other- and I was a weird kid so obviously it was hard for me to find people who liked me as I was. Now that I've had a few friendships where people have shared everything with me, I realize I can't handle the constant negativity that comes with it. I'm pretty sure it's just a boundary issue, but I also can't help but feel guilty because maybe I'm just selfish and not a very emotionally tolerant person.
In the past I think I was so afraid of being alone that I really wanted to have one or two people who I knew would always be there for me no matter what, but now that I'm completely content with being alone my tolerance for that level of emotional closeness is really low. I can't help but question whether I'm actually able to form a close relationship with someone that doesn't end up burning me out. I guess I still want to have close friendships, but how do I do it while still having healthy boundaries so I don't end up repeating the same mistake? Is this just me being selfish and unrealistic because I want the security of emotional closeness in a relationship/friendship without the emotional labor?
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>just be a doormat lmao
Lol the cope lots of men like that trait in women, especially since a lot of them (men) only have that trait when it comes to work or some other solitary aspect of their existence whereas dominant women are usually dominant in all areas.
especially>men don't like problem solvers because they're already problem solvers!!!
The cope lmaooo just say you're dumb and go, your bf doesn't like it as much as you think he does.
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i had this kid genius bf when i was like 13, and i'm still lowkey upset about the time he threw a tantrum because i got him birthday gifts he didn't like (logic puzzles and stuff… I WAS 13 I HAD NO MONEY). he yelled at me lol
he ended up going to stanford, working for google for like a year, and now has his own company that makes… enzymes? but fuck him he's still a manlet and i make more money and he DIDN'T DESERVE MY LOGIC PUZZLES
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Fuck that guy, will I base my opinion on him simply because he rejected your logic puzzles? Yes, I will, what a fucking asshole
You deserve someone who will appreciate your logic puzzles, anon
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I wish my mom had a better life. Shitty abusive and neglectful parents, abusive first husband and cheating/lying second husband.
Three shitty children (I'm included). No friends. Shitty siblings that lie and borrow money or gossip behind her back. I love her so much but I want to cry. She works so hard, 40 or more hours a week and has no time for herself, not even time to date. And any men in her pool would be absolute pieces of shit.
Wish I won the lottery and could give her half of it.
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How do i get over the fact that I dated a creep and gave my firsts to a creep? I don't know if anyone is actually going to read all of this, but i have no one else to talk to and i would like to hear someone's else's opinion about all of this. I don't want to get into my life story but from 10 to 12 and 14 to 17 I was a complete shut in so I lost life experience and I also never had a boyfriend. When I was 17 i pushed myself to change and get better. I had friends, i went back to school and I used to go to parties and get drunk sometimes too. When I had just turned 18 (he was 23 for context) all my friends already had their first kiss and lost their virginity so I feel like peer pressure was also part of me wanting a boyfriend and giving my first kiss. I met him at a beach party and our first encounter (after i had already seen him in two other parties and had a little crush because he was funny) was when I entered a tent to sleep and he was there as well, I was drunk so I started to drunk talk about music with him, he told me I was beautiful, he had never kissed a girl and wanted to kiss me and I was like nope. I guess that should have been a red flag since he knew I was drunk but he still asked?(we didn't kiss). After that he contacted me and we started to talk, we ended up going out and so he became my boyfriend. The thing is the first time I gave him a handjob was when I was drunk with friends at a festival. We distanced ourselves to a country side path and we started to kiss and he took his dick out, i was kind of shook but i guess I went with it but he started to get very pushy saying let's fuck over and over again but still i didn't want to, and after maybe two hours we went back. The next day he apologized saying i was drunk and he shouldn't have done that (so he knew he had done something wrong) and he was saying he couldn't control himself, beating himself up but i was too shy to say anything so I just told him it was fine. He was obsessed with his first love (they never dated, he liked her and she rejected him) and always talked about her saying i looked like her. He even used to go to her instagram with me etc. He was always pushing me to lose his verginity, saying it would have made us closer and bullshit like that, even back then I was thinking like, bro wtf are you doing…? Do you think I don't see what you're doing? There have been other three instances where he kind of pressured me to give him a blowjob when we were outside and I'm so ashamed of it I think it's gross and I want to forget. He also wanted to fuck outside and used to say bullshit like "everyone does it, everyone has places because ofc they can't do it at home c'mon" i was still thinking like wtf are you doing? It's making me mad thinking about it lmao, like he thought I was stupid or something (i guess I was, ugh). I went to his house two times, one time we went out for a bit(we lived in two different but close towns) his friends saw me and started screaming "woo hisname today fucks! woo" and he just laughed looking at them and told me "leave them be". One time we went to another party with my friends and I got very drunk. He didn't notice me the whole party, he was with his friends and I was with mine, then when I was very drunk we were together, we started to make out and i don't remember much of it until he put his hand down there, he was shit lmao, he didn't know shit but the thing is, for the two times i went to his house, he knew i was against him touching me there. I really hated the thought of someone doing that (still do). He also pressured me those times at his house saying "c'mon c'mon" but still i didn't want to. He stopped as soon as he realized how drunk i was but still it makes me angry and sick thinking about it. He was addicted to porn but he was aware and wanted to stop, he had talked to me about but I didn't know what that meant back then, i never watched porn so I was very clueless about anything regarding that (now I know more and i hate pornsick men ugh).
He told me another girl friend confessed to him but he chose me because I was prettier. This isn't to be mean but he wasn't attractive and he was short (I'm 5'1 he was 5'2) i didn't care back then(still don't to an extent) i always thought everyone is beautiful in some way but now I realize it wasn't the same to him or most men. I was pretty to him.
Around two years ago everything was too much and I started to become shut in again, i tried to shut it down at first, but eventually I gave into neetdom again. Since I couldn't go outside and i wanted to not talk to anyone and be left alone, i tried to break up with him 3 times. 1st time he got angry, 2nd he was no no no I'll wait for you let's just keep talking, 3rd time he completely ignored it. He was always saying bullshit like I'll wait for you forever but I just wanted him to leave me alone kek. I didn't know how to get rid of him, I've always been shy and a pushover(i don't think I am anymore, i got better) so I just accepted i had to talk to him. After a few months he told me he got drunk and made out with a friend of mine lmao. He said they were both very sorry kek i was relieved i could finally stop talking to him, i didn't want to fight so I just told him it was fine, we were already broken up anyway since I couldn't go outside, deleted everything and blocked him. (This isnt actually true, i don't really care anymore but it frustrated me a little bit that he was saying dumb lame bullshit like I'll wait for you forever when i wanted him to leave me alone and then at the first chance he got he made out with someone, it just showed how much of a coomer he is and makes me even more ashamed of dating him).
After two months, i created a profile in a forum, he knew the nickname i used for everything (very dumb of me using the same nickname for everything, i don't do this anymore but I'm very reserved, i have nothing to hide and i don't talk to anyone so I never thought someone would do something like this) and he found me right away. It was creepy. He wrote me he was suicidal and he needed to talk to me urgently. I unblocked him and he basically said he actually didn't have anything to say and he just wanted to talk to me, so i answered to his messages a couple of times but then i left him on seen. I didn't have the heart to block him again, but he kept contacting me so after two times i blocked him again. This was a bit less than year ago, around that time my phone also broke, since i didn't have any use for it I only bought one again 5-6 months ago. I didn't mention this earlier but I also had sent him 2-3 nudes when we were together. I don't want to blame everything on him pressuring me because it's not like that, i don't want what I wrote to be based on one side, but there was definitely him saying "c'mon c'mon" even here. This made me anxious, since i didn't know if he deleted them and i was scared he could have posted them somewhere. 4 months ago he sent me a message on my phone saying "it didn't make sense blocking me".
After thinking about it for a while, i decided to contact him to ask about the pictures. He said he had deleted them, to not worry, and to write to him sometimes. I told him no. Since then he contacted me other 3 times, so today I decided to block him again. So yeah this is basically it, I don't understand why he can't leave me alone, it's been two years. How do I get over being ashamed of having dated him and everything that came with it? I wish I could forget. I would like some other anons opinions about all of this. Sorry about how shitty this is written.
That’s understandable anon, seeing people maintaining longer relationships than you despite acting worse would make anyone question their worth. The thing is though, that’s not a good thing at all for them or their relationship. It may outlast yours but so what? Unhealthy relationships can drag on for decades if allowed to. They’re not desirable, and are rarely completely fixable. It’s a good sign that your chosen partners respected themselves enough to spare the heartbreak.
The thing I find really frustrating is comparing my relationships to people that act like you described, who don’t have a diagnosis and aren’t seeking one. It feels like they’re given a free pass to act completely insane because they’re not actually insane (on paper), whereas I’m under scrutiny even for normal behaviour because I’m not allowed to act insane even though I am insane? I don’t know, those are some mental gymnastics and it makes me feel bad. So I get how you feel. The only way forward is recovery and understanding that toxic
relationships are nothing to be jealous about.