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No. 1655965
No one came to her party.
Previous Thread:
>>>/ot/1646614 No. 1656072
>>1656066Uh no, I'm not going to do that. My grandmother isn't a pickme, and I like I said, I love her a lot. She's not a terrible person or anything and for a long time she was the only person I could rely on while dealing with my
abusive, extremely mentally ill mother. and I'm definitely not going to use her for money either. She's just one of those older women, but she's still an amazing person.
No. 1656089
File: 1691346787625.gif (2.57 MB, 275x202, 1664106722303.gif)
My cystic acne medication which had been keeping my skin successfully in check for well over a year decided to glitch out the other day (after I consumed milk) and I wound up with two cystic zits on my face. One being a second head swollen on my forehead right above the front of my brow.
Just in time for an event with friends outdoors. So I chose to break out my full face slap for the occasion, which was consequently sweated off in the humidity and several miles of walking. Do I sweat so profusely anywhere else like on my back, butt, or pits? Nope, just my face which added an element of humiliation on top of uncovering the red hue of the unpoppable mass.
I look crusty and disgusting in the pictures I did take. It wasn't even the most humid it could have been, but my body gave zero fucks and unleashed the sweat dam on my face regardless.
The only thing I can say about myself is that outwardly I took it in stride and didn't let on to my group how bothered I was. Tried to have a good time in spite of my insecurity, since I did all that I could do.
I just hate my body and the stereotypical fat girl shit it does.
People in the group were complaining about their sweaty backs but I would have traded with them in a heartbeat since their faces looked dry and did not have runny beading ughhh.
No. 1656121
>>1656115Why are you haunting the thread just to infight. Go cry in get it off your chest if you don't want people commenting about your precious wittle gramgram.
Damn, that's what anons get for trying to give some advice.
No. 1656171
File: 1691350202207.jpeg (70.34 KB, 720x720, IMG_9387.jpeg)
>>1656164My irls and even most of my online friends have been ignoring me lately and I've been awful about reaching out. I feel like the shittiest person
>>1655601I also want that (from the last thread, sorry)
>>1655623It makes me seem like a pickme but there's a part of me that yearns for intimacy. All the men I thought love me have trashed me and I grew up around loveless parents in a crappy household. It's not wrong to want love, right? To have all this affection pent up inside and nobody to throw it at. My friends mostly ignore me too after I had a mental break last year and I'm in no position to be in a relationship, but I want one when I'm healthier. Then there's the part of me that wants to be alone so I never bother anyone with my problems, because nobody deserves them.
No. 1656179
i wish there was a world in which men were not real. i want to see women playing music and producing it and mixing it and mastering it with no men in the signal chain whatsoever; i want to see women "geniuses", women doing as much of "men's work" as we want without men even being part of the question, without them even being ornamental. i want them gone or i want a version of life where they do not exist and therefore do not stand there like hulking, overpowered retards,blindly and autistically setting the standards for how people should value things in the world. i hope the next male drummer i see kills himself. (i accept my ban). i hope every "sound guy" in the world trips on his cables and dies instantly. so much talent and joy has dissipated into the ground through the suffocating, oppressive fog of male sensibilities, male values, male standards, male interest and male history; it's so pervasive that even we can struggle to articulate to ourselves and accept the extent to which we've been discouraged, herded away invisibly from hobbies, careers, friendships, fields of study and art, because men rule the world.
No. 1656181
>>1656171Nonna, I hope you don't take this as me trying to lecture you, I just maybe want to give some advice and a little perspective.
First of all
>part of me that wants to be alone so I never bother anyone with my problems, because nobody deserves themThis is a pretty unhealthy mindset, and as somebody who has been a friend to someone with that mindset, it SUCKS. It results in the person constantly pushing you away and then "fishing" for connection/compliments/coddling in the most drawn out way because they feel like they can't ask for it. Idk, if I were you, I'd do your best to do therapeutic work on your issues, whether self administered or in a professional setting, and then let go of that impulse to "not be a burden". People naturally need to be around others and seek community and connection, so let yourself do that. If you're worried about overwhelming a friend, just have a conversation with them. "Hey, I know I look to you for support a lot, so I wanted to check in and make sure I'm not overwhelming you. Please be honest about it so I don't do that".
Make sure YOU'RE supportive of them, too! Nobody wants to be an unpaid therapist in their free time!
>My friends mostly ignore me too after I had a mental break last yearGet new friends ASAP
>It's not wrong to want love, right? To have all this affection pent up inside and nobody to throw it at.It is not wrong, it's how you were built, and it is natural to feel that way. I know people think it's overdone, but see if you can get a little cat to spoil and love while you work on meeting new people and cultivating friendships. It really helps and makes you feel less desperate to "alleviate" your loneliness.
I really hope things look up for you soon, nonita. Don't give up!
No. 1656186
File: 1691351465080.jpg (17.15 KB, 454x337, d6002ac7d5e9ea8a0f89a0a6f50ba7…)
>Never bought anything expensive for myself other than computers and phones.
>Favorite character has an affordable figure released and it's surprisingly well made.
>But I live in a shit third world country.
>I know I would end up paying 4x the price of the figure since my country has high taxes.
>I save money for months and wait patiently for the pre-order, checking it everyday.
>Pre-order opens I order and as soon as it's done I refresh the page and the pre-order is out.
>Feel good about it, like it's meant to be!
>The figure is coming out this month and I religiously check my email and the website.
>They just announced they will stop most shipping options to my country with the only option being the most expensive one, making it impossible for me to pay for it.
I don't even know why I try anymore. I am devastated. Why can't I have one single fucking thing.
No. 1656192
>>1656186let me guess, DHL is the only option?
you can try a shipping forwarder that declares it as a gift so you don't pay any taxes.
I assume it's a japanes figure?
I feel your pain nonna.
No. 1656294
>>1656204I hate DHL with a burning passion, I'm europoor and I avoid it like the plague if it's from outsid the EU
you're not pathetic and I understand you, you just want something that makes you feel happy
if it's not too much too ask what figure is it? maybe it's available somewhere else where it would be easier to order from
A shipping forwarder can also declare the value LOWER than it is so that can help in paying less taxes
No. 1656295
File: 1691359422745.jpg (102.54 KB, 900x506, Tumblr_l_313382348511349.jpg)
I am missing my mom so much. She died last year and my heart is still broken. Other than missing her as a person and our relationship, it's also just so weird that the literal place you came from - her literal womb - is gone. I know that sounds fucking weird, but it's something I've felt since she died. I really feel on my own now. I love you, mommy.
No. 1656406
File: 1691365059588.png (75.99 KB, 516x470, 1679773752213.png)
I hate being allergic to eggs so much it's unreal. There are so many things I really want to eat but simply can't because it all contains eggs. I can't have cake, cookies, omelettes, tempura, etc. Shit. I hate this so much.
No. 1656436
Preface: I'm in my 30s with a professional career.
Met a really wonderful man recently but all his friends are childfree and anti-natalist, to the point where I don't see it working out between us because his circle doesn't want the responsibility or outright hate children and I think it has rubbed off on him. I went through a childfree phase in my 20s–rightfully so, I don't seriously believe the majority of people are mature and ready enough for kids in their mid 20s or younger–but I do feel I have something to teach and offer children now. Not to mention the selfish goalpost reason of feeling like I have a "redo" to give everything to a child that I never had just to prove that it was always possible if only my own parents ever gave a damn. But I digress, I don't want to cause infight over the reasons why people choose or choose not to have kids.
All I know is that on a recent trip with his friends to an event where children were to be expected, I felt so embarassed. One of his friends went into a catatonic, panic-like episode just because kids were being kids like being loud and crying. Even at the peak of my childfree I would never react that way to the presence of kids and always found their antics kinda amusing. What this friend displayed was akin to massive social anxiety (which is what I thought at first) or a panic attack, until it was explained to me that the children were the actual issue. It's not even that they did anything to bug her, just that they existed within her vicinity which is what sent her. I could understand if we were at a museum, or a bar, but it was an entertainment venue that traditionally includes children so wtaf? I was supportive but inside it just made me cringe at how immature her reaction was, and her manbaby bf too. We all gathered for a break and a snack and they had a roundtable discussion about how much they despise and don't want kids, and I watched this man, who considers me his girlfriend, nod his head and agree and laugh along. I think they expected me to chime with my agreement but I did not. He stood for nothing about his desires or wants, which according to him when I had this discussion he said he was open to a child but would only want one. We fuck with a condom even though I am 30 and on bc which gives me ick vibes. Well, after meeting these friends and a different friend couple who were openly boasting about the dude's vasectomy aka his "snipday" (re: another attractive girl cucking herself for a dorky manbaby clearly beneath her), maybe these are his true intentions. I just don't want to be part of it. Maybe if I thought their interests were refined and noble I could see why kids would not be appropriate for their lifestyles, but no. They just want their spare income for card games and video games, and based on their personalities like being triggeres over inconveniences I agree that they should not reproduce. I'm sorry, but I just think there is more to life than being a nerdy consumer. It's fine to not want kids but their mere existence shouldn't bother anyone to that degree. Not to say children are the answer, I just feel his lifestyle and friends have painted a very unflattering picture.
I think I'm gonna bail and it's enough to state that as a reason why–after all, men cannot expect grown ass women to play the "maybe" games when our 40s are right around the corner as well as theirs. He's nice, and he loves me, but he isn't for me and he should admit it instead of subtly trying to get me to convert.
No. 1656448
>>1656437Are you me,
nonny? I had to stop going to the lesbian thread and any thread circling the topic for that reason. It's really hard for me to find online friends in general, trying to find another woman to talk to that isn't mentally ill or nlogish often feels like looking for endangered species. I just want another online lesbian friend that I can sperg with about media I enjoy or art I make. It sounds kinda weird when I write it out like that, but I get tired of hanging around with my straight friends and often can't relate to their gossip or interests.
No. 1656459
>>1656456>snip dayLmao please fucking stop.
Men who are proud to be neutered instead of just taking reasonable precautions and not knocking up women they don't want to is fucking embarassing.
No. 1656467
>>1656444Tbh I really disliked Tumblr radfems for this reason, I assume there are nice women there but the obsessive policing of other women is really exhausting to me. Like I can get on board with some of what they're saying, but they always take it waaay too far. But maybe I will try again.
>>1656448I also don't like the lesbian threads for this reason. The vitriol towards other women is just so bizarre, like are you all sure you like women? But you don't sound weird, I feel the same way kek, I just want to sperg about fandom and art
and yaoi without it being interrupted with tirades about how OSA women are subhuman or extreme condescension over my interests for "not being feminist enough."
No. 1656508
File: 1691371457628.jpg (27.12 KB, 482x427, ErjByxtWMAAayvM.jpg)
This guy I'm dating has me wrapped about his finger but his eating habits are triggering me a lot. I act cool about it but after we are done hanging out I'm a mess. I love his body and smell his diet really does work well.. god I'm such a failure..
No. 1656533
>>1656531MY LIFE ☠
MY RULES
MY ATTITUDE
MY STYLE
(emoji) No. 1656541
>>1656467Same
nonnie, same. Or the classic sperging about
fujos or whatever. I pretend I can't read english when someone starts that up kek.
No. 1656559
>>1656508Nonna, I don't think you are a failure. If you really like that guy, would you consider talking about what is upsetting you with him, or would you consider talking to a therapist to try and help yourself with what is
triggering you? I know it's easier said than done, but we all have mental struggles, it doesn't make you a failure.
No. 1656579
>>1656576I have this issue too except it's a Tiktok mom and a Reddit dad. It sounds like satire, but my dad very indignantly asked me if I was a
TERF and mansplained JKR crimes to me. It feels like this shit just cannot be real. Sending my support to you nona.
No. 1656599
File: 1691383110460.png (17.31 KB, 511x188, leave her alone.PNG)
why are there males on a lingua ignota group??? wanting her to collab with a fucking tranny is insane
No. 1656644
File: 1691388171736.jpg (73.49 KB, 680x390, Tumblr_l_313384269940193.jpg)
>>1656355Thank you, sweet anon. It's hard to lose them when we're young. Wishing you the best.
No. 1656654
File: 1691388971837.jpg (152.31 KB, 1048x1051, Tumblr_l_2450519754638429.jpg)
>>1656509Nona, me too. I relate to everything you said and you described it really well. I think that my inner experience is via concepts/images. I cannot imagine hearing my own voice inside my head and yeah, it sounds like a very clunky (to me) way to process info. Words are just representations of concepts.
No. 1656680
>>1656399aww
nonny don't worry it should still work plugged in (mine has for the last 6 years lol). Or is mobility an issue? I'm guessing the warranty has already expired and the battery alone costs like 50$
Worst case scenario, nowadays you can use your phone for practically everything. Banking, documents, even spreadsheets. You'll be fine nona!
No. 1656748
File: 1691401261853.jpeg (92.36 KB, 828x818, CF770251-468E-4C78-A994-07F006…)
>tfw thinking back to when my ex was threatening to kick me out. neither of my sisters offered to help me.
>Even before this Trying to get one of my sisters to help me with anything was impossible.
I genuinely think it’s because of some kind of trauma. I won’t go too into detail but I think she thinks that because she struggled a lot that I need to struggle too.Even though she works in and has extensive knowledge about the thing I needed help with. She acted like it was a big chore to fucking help me. I just feel bad because whenever they need help I immediately always try to help them. But sometimes it seems like they struggle to do the same for me and it hurts so much. She use to bully me so much too. And looking back it’s no wonder I have so many issues now. It’s depressing.
No. 1656764
File: 1691404059873.jpeg (197.78 KB, 500x528, fetchimage.jpeg)
Anxious as fuck and can't pinpoint why. My chest hurts. I want to scream.
No. 1656805
File: 1691410019336.jpeg (107.34 KB, 500x631, IMG_7074.jpeg)
>>1655965my medicine ruins my libido, makes me feel a bit apathetic at times (working through it) and has lowered my metabolism and made me hungry even with a stimulant in the mix and ive gained some weight that has really taken a toll on me mentally after working so hard to lose it all. ive seen reports of people on this medicine lose weight, be neutral, but also keep gaining/not losing despite calorie cutting and exercise.
i have recently started exercising again and im going to be strict and borderline starvation calories to see if it helps. i also think the sedantaryness from online school work and the stress causes me to go into the kitchen to eat more and cope…
maybe i can outrun (literally) the medications effects if i return to my strict diet and exercising and enforce a new habit when i get stressed with school work. i am just very sad and ashamed as it is to be on medicine but i went so long denying medicine after so much trial and error while ive finally found a neutral one that doesnt make me want to kill myself/has stopped suicide plans. i can handle obsessive thoughts better too! my mother and boyfriend want me to stay on but what is ok for me?! doesnt the government poison this stuff anyway? im relaly scared and working myself up again nonnies. i want to be rational but not dumb going down the road learning i fucked up my brain and body from medication…
i also dont know what to do about my libido. my boyfriend is never ever pushy or mean to me about it hes wonderful but i miss being sexual and i am certain he does too. i feel really sad this morning.
No. 1656815
>>1656805Meds shouldn't ever be a long time goal, all medicine is poison and you only take them when the benefits outweigh the negative effects (there are always negative effects). You should now get your life together to the point where you can handle obsessive thoughts on your own instead of having to suppress them. Meds are a GREAT tool to take while you sort those things out! You get some clarity of where your brain "should" be by living it. You clearly have some issues with weight gain and body image, please don't indulge in that. Exercise moderately for health but don't starve yourself. Try to pinpoint exactly what in your thoughts make those obsessive thoughts easier to handle now. Are you less stressed overall so they don't happen as much, or do you calm down easier once stressed, or is the stress equal but the obsessive thoughts just don't come now? Find the "true" solution and then find a way to replicate it on your own, you know?
Then do that for every issue you're trying to fix with meds.
Also your brain isn't done developing until your late 20s, so still feeling like a mess at like 25 is actually normal because there's a few years left for your brain to finish, you're still partly in that "teenage angst" period. You hear it all the time from older people, at around 30 they suddenly stopped giving a fuck about certain issues. They think it's because they "matured" as a person, and in a way it literally is that - their brains just finally finished developing. Of course starting early is better, but don't beat yourself up even if you struggle in your 20s.
No. 1656845
File: 1691413805265.jpg (27.19 KB, 449x449, AH.jpg)
I am so anxious because I currently have a pregnancy scare. Moid and I did it with a condom (I stopped taking the pill two-ish weeks ago because I want to get an IUD by the end of this month) but it ripped and he pulled it out instantly (he didn't come inside me though, he finished after I gave him a bj 10 minutes later but I'm still scared because of precum) but that happened two days before my ovulation. I took plan b like 9-ish hours after we had sex but I'm so paranoid that I'll get pregnant because my boobs feel a bit sore (not sure if it's from plan b, they hurt a lot after I took it but it's a bit better now) and my period is supposed to come in two weeks. Please pray for me nonnies I'm gonna cry because getting an abortion here is expensive and not available everywhere.
No. 1656850
>>1656805No, the government does not poison prescription medications. You are not actively poisoning yourself by taking medications for your depression or other mental illnesses. Please do not stop taking them under this assumption.
It is also not a bad thing to be on meds "for the rest of your life", as the other anon claims. Medications are used as supplements to help you when your body is having trouble maintaining or producing something. Think about the same way old people go on meds when they reach a certain age until they die. We're not acting like they should be actively trying to stop taking those supplements, they need them.
Also, "your brain isn't fully matured until your 30s" is a myth. If you look it up, you will see many articles debunking this, here is one of them
https://slate.com/technology/2022/11/brain-development-25-year-old-mature-myth.htmlYou seem to have disordered thoughts about eating and weight gain, I would seek out help for that. I personally would take some weight gain over having the urge to kill myself, but I would talk to your doctor about the libido issues. Say it's impacting your quality of life and harming your personal relationships. The solution might be to go back to more trial and error. I'm sorry that may not be what you want to hear. If you are currently starving or cutting calories in order to maintain a lower weight, that could also be contributing to your lowered libido. Stress can also contribute to it. Again, consult your prescribing doctor and seek out a therapist to help you juggle all of this if you haven't already. I think it would be really good for you.
Good luck, nonna. I hope you can find a solution. I know it can be frustrating, but keep working at it.
No. 1656862
>>1656852I understand how you feel, nonna. I had a tough time getting a decent therapist for a few years there, but I'm going to try again now that I've moved to a different area.
Have you tried a different form of therapy that isn't CBT or DBT if those aren't working for you? You might also try seeing if the therapists have specializations to do with your specific needs, like someone who does work with childhood trauma, or domestic violence.
>>1656855>>1656857Kekk noooo you scared off the 18 year old…
Anyways, I personally recommend weed if you're going to try something like that because it's pretty low stakes. I go to sleep if I accidentally get too high kek. Also because one time I bought a shroom bar and it never fucking kicked in.
Just be aware that if you have a family history of schizophrenia or BPD (I think it's BPD), then there's a small chance taking drugs can exacerbate that or
trigger an episode. I don't know, I'd consult in stoney baloney thread, it's hard to give recs off one vent post, just be aware of the mental health history risk.
No. 1656874
>>1656869What are you talking about? Nonna was just teasing you… You kind of sound like you have a persecution complex.
And tbh, I agree with
>>1656863 recommending strangers try out psychedelics so casually is not the smartest move, considering what happened to her isn't unheard of.
>Weed is a temporary fix to a problem that will be permanent if you don’t address the root of the problemYou sound pretty pretentious kek. I'm not suggesting weed can cure all ills, I just let her know it was useful for me. Why did you suggest psychedelics in the first place if this is how you feel? Also what about my response was "Nixon-level fear"? You are being kind of weird abt this
No. 1656878
>>1656874I don’t have a “persecution complex” I’m reasonably apprehensive about people dogpiling on me for recommending something that could potentially help people due to its bad reputation formed from posts like
>>1656863 when stuff like that only happens if you had psychosis to begin with, it was just dormant. If you don’t have that then you’ll be fine. I said what I said about weed because it’s expensive and I was dependent on myself for a while but I got tired of being so reliant on it just to survive. Mushrooms helped me come to terms with my trauma and as a result I haven’t done drugs in like a year. In my og post I did “have you considered psychedelics” not “you should try psychedelics” and yet that was enough to stir the pot because again, people are ignorant on this subject. I’m not pretentious, I’m just educated enough on these substances to know there’s no reason to get your panties in a wad over the mere mention of them.
No. 1656884
File: 1691416877380.jpg (238.83 KB, 673x715, 72jjud.jpg)
I bought a tshirt that is too big for me out of frustration, it's a damn X and I'm XS now I've to tuck it for it to fit right, this wasn't my plan at all plus its sparkles will fade away no matter what I do so even if the sparkly design is cute it's a waste of money. I'm sick of buying bigger shirts just because I can't find anything on my size, I feel like a kid again.
Should've bought more makeup, perfume or a nice hat, not waste my last 5$ on a damn t-shirt that doesn't even fit me, that's why I buy shirts online at least I can actually find my size with ease. I fucking hate being this slim
No. 1656885
>>1656878Ok but you sound pretentious and like u have a persecution complex
>this drug isn't bad, it can just really fuck you up if you have a condition you may not be aware of having, why are you all pointing that out. this is dogpiling and ignorant.>i never suggested psychedelics, i just asked if she considered them in response to her problems>weed is too expensive!!ok. kek
No. 1656899
>>1656885Idk how any of these statements contradict each other. She never said she has psychosis, just depression, which is what I had. Learn the difference between a suggestion and a recommendation please. I would have accepted a no from her.
>you have a persecution complex, no one’s dogpiling on you>is currently arguing with me for daring to suggest another option for no other reason than it saved my lifeOk. Kek.
No. 1656904
>>1656436I think I would not want to wait for a man to come around to wanting children if I knew that was what I wanted. Men who want scores of children ardently vs men who do not want children are probably two sides of the same psycho coin, but I wouldn’t hedge my bets that he’ll come around from being “open to a child” to actually being a good, present father. If you want kids I feel as though part of your obligation to them (and to yourself lbr) is to provide them with a father who’s not a total emotionally barren deadbeat to his offspring - especially as a mature, established woman with options such as yourself. No need to feel bad about it either. In your 30s is when you start looking to “settle down” and an intended lifelong relationship can’t really outlast disagreements on whether or not to have children. Not to sound like a moid so I’ll just say from my personal POV: I think a man running out a woman’s biological clock with his inability to make a fucking decision is one of the more sinister things he can do. Rue the day I may be 39 and some chump says “let’s have a baby I’m ready NOW” like fuuuuuuuck yourself. Also
> I just think there is more to life than being a nerdy consumerI was also relatively childfree in my 20s but I have felt this so fucking hard since I turned 30. Life is really just vidya match wait times? Until you die? New Marvel movie until you die? I’d rather eat lead.
No. 1656986
File: 1691422115207.gif (1.66 MB, 583x405, 2331E5C4-D83D-4340-9ABD-6F925D…)
>>1656683Send him a glitter bomb anon, I did that to my ex and it was fantastic
No. 1656993
>>1656970I would just let him know you genuinely appreciate him trying but you treat the gym time as a solo- you time, Im sure he would understand.
Its happened to me before, and this guy helped me with a technique. I said the same as above and he shook my hand, and let me be. We wave across the gym now and its all good.
No. 1657028
I suffered from anxiety since I was 10 (27 now), I’ve been on and off medication but in the last month I suffered a lot from psychosomatic symptoms. I felt my throat closing all the time, my nerves “tickled” (not native speaker bear with me for this) around my face, mouth and inside of it. My muscles were so fucking tense it made my neck ache and since I also work under a costant cold air conditioner, my chest nerves got irritated to the point I was afraid to breathe due to the pain.
I got checked: I don’t have anything. Zero. Checked twice, still nothing, I’m just very, very anxious and my body started to break down. Now I’m healed or sort off (I still have to relax my neck and throat muscles) but I had some panic attacks due to these symptoms and that left me scarred to the point that I think that’s suspicious if I’m healed, now. I constantly check my throat, my lynphonodes, the color of my tongue, how I breathe, temperature, oxygen saturation, if I’m bleeding somewhere.
I’m aware that I need therapy, but right now it’s very expensive and I don’t want to bother my friends about my costant ill feeling (and that doesn’t even makes sense because I’m okay and I know, on a surface level), I’m afraid for my life and I’m scared I wont achieve anything due to my health but again, I’m fine. I hadn’t had a fever in two years, I’m feeling okay, I’m breathing perfectly, I can eat and drink perfectly and more importantly when I have fun all of these things disappear, so yeah, I need help for my anxiety and still I feel, aside from money problems, I’ll just waste the therapists’ time but saying over and over that I’m okay, I got checked twice, I’m not feeling ill at all but I feel that something is gonna happen.
I need to hear some nice words from time to time and I feel horrible about asking for comfort but I really want to be assured that I’ll be okay, somehow.
About what happened to cause all of things. Nothing. Fucking nothing.
I’ve had a rough past but since I was 20 I’m away from any abusive situation so I’m alright, but then I changed my job and all of this started and ended after a month.
Sigh nonnies I hate this….
No. 1657065
File: 1691426276572.jpeg (83.21 KB, 1200x673, 8519D37C-3930-4D9A-B706-31E3C2…)
>>1657007The companies that send glitter bombs also send realistic shit in a can. I also sent him one of those but that didn’t get the reaction the glitter did. The glitter pissed him off so bad that his gf and her family started contacting me and saying I should go to jail KEK it was wonderful. Apparently some got in her eye. And now they will have glitter in their apartment until they move tf out.
No. 1657069
>>1657063Sure, I’m shitting up the thread when it’s you who’s choosing to argue with me, when all I ever did was make a suggestion. You sound pissy anon, maybe try some shrooms.
>>1657065Was just about to say this, this happened to me in high school but the only reason I got away with it is because there were no cameras, and I kept my mouth shut. Maybe go with the classic bag-of-shit-on -fire plan after all
No. 1657107
It pisses me off so badly when people try to be like "Um, actually, air conditioning is really bad for climate change so you shouldn't use it" yeah okay we should all just fucking get heat stroke instead I guess. It isn't like it's some superfluous thing like fast fashion, it's an actual health issue, you will get fucking brain damage from excessive heat. And just in general, it just makes me so mad how we're constantly being told to individually stave off a systemic problem. It's always on us, it's always about how we should take 5 minutes showers, stop using air conditioning, stop going outside during the daytime, stop eating meat, stop using straws, stop flying out to see family, stop buying from grocery stores, stop using dryers, stop driving and bike instead (as if this makes any fucking sense in the blazing heat). Like fuck you for real. I want to live an actual real person life. In what world is it more reasonable to be like aw shucks, guess instead of regulating the most egregious pollutors we ought to tell people to just not go on their patios between 10AM and 5PM like are you serious. It's just so retarded because it's like, "Hm, we designed cities to force Americans to use cars, but it's so bad to use cars so you shouldn't. But also we're not fine with remote work, and our public transit is garbage, and so uhh yeah." And practically every conversation about individual action against climate change is like this. The system is literally designed to be used a certain way and makes alternatives very financially inaccessible and time consuming, but if you participate in the system as it was designed, you're the asshole. Sorry if this sounds like a Redditor rant, got hit with a "AC is bad ya know" and it pissed me off because it's easy to fucking say that if you're not the one melting alive with daily heat advisories where people are getting hospitalized from the heat. Yes I am turning on my air conditioning instead of a goddamn fan, I don't care. You try hanging out in 100 degree weather with 80% humidity and see how much you like it. Bitch.
No. 1657151
I wanna move back to my old city, I hate freeloading off my mom, but I also don't feel super bad because she's been living at my grandma's house, now my uncle's house, for the past 15 years and has probably gambled enough money away that she could've gotten her own house by now. It's only been for the summer while I've been recovering from an injury, my uncle is already tired of me being here and sending me apartments to look at. I never liked my uncle, he was a real oppressive asshole in my childhood and made living here miserable, and my grandma treated him basically like her husband/son, it was gross. I wanna help my mom get a place, but I also don't. I guess it's because I feel bad for my younger sister and her baby, but I got an abortion at 19 to save me the trouble. I hate saying it but it's not my fault and I don't feel sorry she had a kid with some fuckboy who doesn't want to care for the child. If anything, I just feel bad for the baby who will probably grow up without stability. I just wanna move somewhere comfortable instead of in this trash state. I don't think they'd understand and would hold it against me, but I've better off down there. I got fat since moving back to my old city and I'm just been regularly depressed, lost my apartment/job due to an injury, got entangled with some loser dudes, all dumb shit. I was physically active down there, I was fit, and I was making moves to make my life improve. Not sure what to do with myself here, don't wanna be here.
No. 1657162
>>1657107Piggybacking off your vent.
I know someone who works for a big tech company and I got a tour of the premises. I got to see first hand the scale of corporate waste. I realized that even if I dedicated my entire life to conserving resources and energy, it wouldn't put a dent in what this one company produces in a single day. We don't live in a world where the common person's efforts can affect any type of change whatsoever, and guilt tripping us over it is just another way to keep us from paying attention to what the people at the top are doing. Systemic problems require systemic solutions, but we're too chickenshit to put anyone in charge of those solutions because they always end up being pieces of shit who don't do their job and steal from us. It's an unwinnable scenario and I'm done playing. I'll still try my best to be considerate, but I'm not going to gimp my life or lie awake at night worrying about the future of the planet when I couldn't change it if I tried.
No. 1657235
>>1657196I'm sorry to hear that, nonna. I haven't experienced that at all so I didn't know that could happen. In that case it sounds like a tolerance problem, so I guess the solution would be switching between two or three of the most effective meds as the need arises. Which sounds like a lot of trouble, but it's better than roping, kek.
Of course if you can get off of meds then that is a viable option, but the stability meds can bring shouldn't be overlooked. And building up a med tolerance =/= it is bad to be on meds for life. I didn't want nonita to feel any shame if she needs to stay on meds longterm; that's a reality for many people. And always striving towards "getting off my meds" can really harm someone's health if it isn't feasible for their situation.
Again, I'm sorry to hear about your experience. I hope you were able to find other solutions.
No. 1657256
>>1657247Okay, but an infight is an infight, and responding to bait is still against the rules, no matter how mad or butthurt you are. "You're in the vent thread, so obviously I'm mad and it's your fault if I make angry posts at you!" is a dumb excuse. I'm not saying that the annoying baitfags don't suck, I hate them too, but that is a poor excuse that doesn't help the thread.
If you find yourself unable to control your fingers, then close the window for a while. Or post in get it off your chest next time.
No. 1657259
Nonnies it’s so hot nonnies I wanna die. I can’t think straight, the ac is set to 75 but it’s 82 in here (yes the ac works and pumps out cold air it’s just really hot outside and I got shitass insulation). I’m laying on my couch in just my undies with an ice pack and two fans on me. I still am hot, I hate this. Fuck August, all my homies hate august.
>>1657257Yes sorry the heat is making me retarded
No. 1657284
>>1657162Corporate waste is awful and it's not even necessities. So many companies,
especially hip tech companies, yak on and on about being sustainable and caring for our environment yet have shit like tens of soda coolers per floor, electric massage chairs, random office crap and quirky plushies their in-house "pep squad" gives to their employees, it's ridiculous. My boyfriend's company is not only polluting the earth with millennial cringe fake positivity and cat memes, their totally cool fun offices consume ungodly amounts of energy per hour and they throw perfectly good office furniture out almost monthly. I hate capitalism, I hate tech bros.
No. 1657339
File: 1691448809527.jpeg (20.01 KB, 275x255, 04B897B3-D4FE-4C32-835A-4B21B7…)
My ex broke up with me forever ago to work on himself and even though it’s almost been a year I think he’s actually stayed single? I don’t know if that’s better or worse than it being a lie honestly
No. 1657358
File: 1691450873375.jpg (45.16 KB, 600x578, 130221984383.jpg)
>spend 3 days in a row with guy I'm casually dating
>he wants to introduce me to his friends
>wants to take me on a double date
>wants to go kayaking
>keeps gassing me up about how interesting and cool I am
>just texts me kiss emojis and "(heart emote) you" today
I know what is gonna happen I'm gonna develop feelings for him and he will never make me his gf and I'll seethe
No. 1657360
>>1656878Fellow shroom anon here, I agree that despite the recent studies backing up the responsible use of psychedelics and their effectiveness in treating certain mental health conditions (OCD, Major depression, PTSD, substance abuse disorder, etc.), especially alongside therapy, it's frustrating to see that psilocybin is still in its reefer madness phase. Dose matters, psychological background matters. Those with a family history of schizophrena/bipolar disorder or those directly suffering from it should avoid it so as not to
trigger psychosis. One definitely shouldn't start with a large dose off the bat (anything above 1g), although it has worked for some people. It's not something one should risk. Starting small by microdosing (anything from 100mg-under 500mg which will generally have subperceptual effects such as a mood boost mood, focus, calmness, and the like, no hallucinations) with adequate tolerance breaks in between is the way to go, and after finding out what works for them, one can later consider working their way up to a higher dose. 4 days on, 3 days off is a popular dosing schedule. I'm someone who's benefitted from a combination of light dosing and microdosing psilocybin here and there, and can say that the daily depression and anxiety that was in the background has quieted down quite a lot. The problem is its reputation as a wild hallucinatory party drug and hippy dippy retards out there who think taking a heroic dose and blasting off all at once is a test of pride and courage. For the most part, however, the psychedelic community (as far as psilocybin at least) tends to be more responsible. It's the undereducated newbies and fratbros who tend to think it's a good idea to "go big or go home" and end up overdoing it. I suggest people try watching How To Change Your Mind on Netflix to at least get a better idea of the history of psychedelics and how they're being used to treat certain patients with great success. It's not for everyone, but it could help a lot of people if we were able to educate others to get rid of the stigma and misconceptions.
No. 1657388
I'm tired. I want to stay away from people and have nothing to do with anything in the world, and live alone in some cottage in the mountains. I want to throw away my electronics that aren't necessary for survival (including this phone I'm typing this post on) and grow plants, flowers, fruits, vegetables in my garden and just wake up, bath, cook, enjoy my hobbies, bath again, and then sleep. But it's not realistic at all, perhaps even cringey, there's no way someone can suddenly start living in the mountains without any problems, there's no way I'll ever be safe and sound — whether from wild animals or from criminals (moids). Sucks that living such a life is my only dream since childhood but I can never archive it. I can't even seem to enjoy anything or find happiness in things I used to like. I'm constantly weighted down by my shitty brain that won't let me forget about my CSA, this shitty third world country, my shitty family and their shitty financial problems that are somehow something I need to help with and do 3 different kind of jobs for, otherwise they'll marry me off to some moid thrice my age as long as he brings in the money. I'm so fucking tired. I wish I wasn't born, no idea why I continue living anymore when I'm never going to have the peaceful life I want.
No. 1657395
File: 1691454886711.jpeg (99.87 KB, 933x1035, 1677492908545.jpeg)
>>1656210>>1656294Thank you nonnas, I feel a bit better and reading your replies helped too, sorry for the late reply. I looked up the shipping forwarder and I don't think it will help in my case. My country has a specific issue going on that I doubt I can bypass it without paying for the DHL shipping. Since the figure is coming out this month I will probably loose my pre order before things go back to normal. I'm upset but something inside me knew something would come up. I appreciate the words though.
No. 1657416
File: 1691457552422.gif (139.44 KB, 278x310, 72990dfadc0c8ee686b701e0fafbcb…)
i feel so guilty i cant fall asleep. Everyone is so nice to me and all I did was waste their time and get them worried for nothing. Im still so so so happy that they helped me and i know they dont mind. but I still have this nagging voice in my head that says that if i hadnt been so stressed then they would had timed their help differently in a way that was more convenient for them.
its stupid because I know they helped me because they wanted to and not because I pressured them but… dunno i still feel guilty
No. 1657430
>>1657414You need to go to the hospital and get rabies prophylaxis. Bat bites are legitimately unnoticeable and you wouldn’t feel it if it bit you. You can’t be sure it didn’t if you weee in a closed room with it. Please don’t die
nonnie please take yourself to the hospital I wish I was kidding I’m really not
No. 1657436
File: 1691461576388.png (533.83 KB, 551x543, livelaughluv.png)
i didn't know whether to put this in vent or stupid questions. nonnas when are you too old to pursue your dreams? are you ever too old? i've been terrified of ageing since i was 15, that was ten years ago. i've struggled with mental health bullshit and psych hospitals thats kept me unemployed until recently and i'm slowly working up to full time and the job i'm in makes me feel really optimistic for the future sometimes but i don't know if i'm kidding myself. i'm trying to get myself to take online certificate courses in the industry (corporate side of fashion/fashion merchandising) but i also feel hopeless when my mental health feels like i'll never have a full grasp on it. i dream about moving somewhere else and starting over and even to another country but deep down i feel destined to rot away in this hellhole i grew up in and never amount of anything but binge drink and minimum wage jobs. feelsbadman.
No. 1657441
File: 1691462599038.jpeg (300.11 KB, 1170x803, 912606D5-7CE3-4E1F-888C-E20207…)
>>1657438Nonnie I’d call another ER and lie and say it nipped you. Bats are rabies reservoirs everywhere, you don’t want to be the first rabies death in your country in decades because you spoke to literal retard nurses.
No. 1657450
File: 1691463981690.gif (1.12 MB, 275x275, 5FA27405-FF93-459E-95FA-6CA755…)
I think I have a fucking staph infected bug bite on my fucking thigh. I didn’t itch it or mess with it. Why do bug bites give me staph infections?!?!?! Fucking mystery I hate this shit. It’s been a decade since this happened but it was a fucking mosquito bite last time, too, just on my knee not my thigh. Fuck summer and fuck mosquitoes I do not want to go on fucking antibiotics I swear to god I might just let this kill me. Anytime I go on antibiotics I have to finish up with a course of antifungal medicine cause I get CANDIDA all over my chest. And I invariably have to convince the doctor to prescribe me the antifungal and they’re usually barely willing and lecture me on how it’s bad for my liver and to try topicals first BITCH I KNOW ITS NOT GOOD FOR ME and topicals DONT DO SHIT no matter how religious I am about application. AHHHHHHHH
No. 1657454
>>1657438Third anon here.
Nonnie, PLEASE go to a different ER, lie if you have to. Don't call ahead, just go. There have been so many cases where someone saw a bat in their room, let it out, went to bed, and ended up contracting rabies because they didn't know they were bit. You need to get the shot for it. It is time sensitive.
No. 1657459
>>1657454Yeah I really hope
nonnie goes and gets the shots, getting into peoples’ homes and rooms is not normal bat behavior to begin with. And bats that are acting abnormal are most likely to have rabies. Getting bit by a bat is like getting bitten by a fucking ghost, you wouldn’t know.
And the only way you’ll know you have rabies is if you develop symptoms, at which point, there is no cure and you cannot be saved and it is 100% fatal. And that could happen anywhere from like a week from now to a year from now depending on where you were nipped.
No. 1657492
>>1657481I am so glad, nonna. I know we're all strangers, but I was so worried about you, especially because we'd never know what happened to you unless you came back to tell us. I'm glad you did.
>>1657477Yes, as
nonnie said
>>1657459 it is like getting bitten by a ghost. Sources say that the bite closes up within hours. So you'll never know if you were bitten, if you didn't actively observe it. Doctors can be really dismissive and condescending about it, but you do not want to be the one person who got bitten and didn't know it and didn't get PEP. The most recent string of deaths in the US occurred in 2021.
https://www.cdc.gov/media/releases/2022/p0106-human-rabies.htmlA rabies death is a really bad death, you do not want to experience it. And its come out in the past decade that our one post-onset treatment, The Milwaukee Protocol, was likely just a fluke. The sole success case, a 15 year old girl, has not been replicated. Her name was Jeanna Giese if you want to look up more about her and the treatment. Here are a couple of links to more info on rabies in bats and what you should do if you wake up with a bat in the house (answer: get the freaking shot).
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/bats-rabies-prevention-shots_n_598c8046e4b0a66b8bb19fa9https://www.cdc.gov/rabies/exposure/animals/bats.html No. 1657510
>>1657481Good.
Not being bitten doesn't mean you're not infected, there have been cases of people getting rabies from bats spitting at them and spit hitting them in the nose, mouth, or eyes.
No. 1657733
>>1657702you're not alone
nonnie, i pluck out my eyelashes and it's horrible. i can't stop because my eyes itch a lot so i pick out my lashes because i think they're falling out causing the itch. fuck it, i should stop, it's just awful and makes me look visibly insane, i should just cut them all off and wait for them to grow back and stop touching them ffs
>>1657727plebbit is for pickmes (pregfag handmaidens) and trannies, what did you expect? go to the friend finder thread i guess
No. 1657737
I am just too deeply nostalgic that it hurts most days and I can't relate to anyone around me who feels the same. I crave the 90s/00s era so badly. The media and internet were peak and honestly I hate that we have entered the internet tiktok, onlyfans, minimalist hell that we're in now. The internet is a career place now, video sites are oversaturated, no one cares if you have a blog, no one cares about anything the same way. I miss the random patient effort we had a few decades ago. I miss the music, granted shitty pop always existed but even the pop was bearable. And we didn't read into all the satanic crap like we do now. Troons used to hide in their basements and now I literally get forced to speak in pronouns at my workplace. I hate the pressure of today, and I've really thought about whether I'm just being a sour older person but I'm only in my mid 20s and I shouldn't feel this way. I'm sad for the current kids who don't have cartoons to make them laugh but have fucking cartoons that force them to learn. I miss when you could go to the cinema and you didn't have to read reviews about a blockbuster going in because you knew whatever was on would be pretty good. The internet was still full of cringy people but it "felt" different. Even fucking 4chan was funny back in the day, I remember the draw threads. Early mmos were super fun and there was no paywalls involved every new update. I miss when you could pass by dressing ugly and not feel self conscious about it. Everyones faces weren't tarnished with mild plastic surgery and weird massages and everyone looked unique and crooked in their own way. I miss when people didn't record every living moment and stare at their phones for everything they do, shopping lists, googling something etc. I miss going to the library and seeing lots of people there including teenagers. I miss malls and the less consumerist feeling they had, it wasn't perfect, but it had a vibe. A lot of malls retained the 80s arcades and cafes and architecture and now its all gone. I miss the neon colours everywhere, I miss the awkwardness of fonts. I miss the stupid paperclip on my word document. I fucking hate how much I'm tracked now, like a wounded animal with a tag on it's neck who's constantly being watched. Then having bullshit ads thrown back at my face for a product I stared at a little too long on facebook for. I miss the comedy of tv shows and how you could get away with being rude or showing slapstick.
I am so painfully angry at myself for not realizing how good it was back then. I tell myself to enjoy the current years as I will surely feel this way about the present in the future, but how can I when everything now DISGUSTS me? It's not just cringe like it was back then, I am genuinely disgusted at people now. At how men and women have become, at how preachy films are, how saturated and boring the internet is, how lifeless architecture is, how I have to see groomers and troons everywhere I go in my city, at how sad peoples faces look now. This soft, smooth world is fucking awful. I'm sick of hearing about nutrition, and the gym, and girl bossing, and dropshipping.
I am so painfully nostalgic, and it honestly hurts. I get such good feelings whenever I run into a book or a website or a toy from a few decades ago. I could ride that high all day before the feeling trickles away and I am reminded in the morning of the living hell I am being forced to be accustomed to. Nothing will ever go back to the way it was. The sun won't glow the same anymore.
No. 1657746
>>1657742Last time I did that we found out the fridge was infested in cockroaches. Never again.
>>1657743I always forget…
No. 1657748
>>1657740I began watching a lot of strange movies from those eras especially independent films. I'll have to make a list and post it.
I'm also going to a toy show this weekend featuring 90s/00s toys which is hopefully going to be super wicked.
But your current hobby sounds amazing nonna, when you say collecting old tapes do you mean like you go to op shops and buy them or at garage sales or something? The feeling you must get from seeing these tv segments is awesome. I attempted to watch current tv at a friends place and I couldn't bear how awful it is now, even the ads back then were a work of art worth watching lol
No. 1657750
>>1657749that sucks, maybe a convenience store then? if you haven't made another mcdonalds order already
also you could buy a pack of candy and carry the candy with you, it's better than just one snack and you'll run out of it slower
No. 1657754
I really hate when you think you have changed or become bigger or stronger and then something happens, someone challenges you, and your (((rational mind))) starts thinking and instead of acting (of course) you carefully, sensibly, slowly choose how to respond (((maturely))) i.e. stand there silent, still, and like an idiot while someone walks all over you, and you shut your mouth to keep the peace. And you realise the whole time you were just as big a coward as you always were you just got lucky and didn't have to deal with it. I got slapped in the face in front of everyone by a child a birthday party and I didn't say anything because I didn't want to make a scene and the kids parents and no one stepped in to discipline this kid, so the kid got off scot free and everyone just looked at me with this weird mix of pity and yet they clearly seemed to accept the hierarchy with me now on the bottom….. I didn't even know how to respond afterwards, I just went and sat off to the side and stayed quiet, fucking humiliating.((((learn2integrate))))
No. 1657793
>>1657787sorry i think i wrote it vaguely bc im so upset, he left me shortly before i was raped and i hid it from him because i was worried he’d blame himself for me getting raped
but no his immediate response was being frustrated with me because i wasn’t “careful enough” and my family “failed me”
i’m not saying it was his fault it happened bc it wasn’t but i hid it for so long partially because i was worried he would blame himself and when he finally found out he didn’t even reflect over it his kneejerk reaction was just “your fault” and when i told him that was the reason i was often reluctant to have sex his response was “well i didn’t know that” when he was always the one who instigated it and basically guilted me when he could tell i was reluctant
i once called this man “the love of my life” i want to kill younger me at least she wouldn’t have seen him for who he is and be dealing w all this shit now
No. 1657803
>>1657793my point still applies because he still saw you as "his property" because of the sexual relations that happened between you, especially since he
>guilted me when he could tell i was reluctantalso
>his immediate response was being frustrated with me because i wasn’t “careful enough” and my family “failed me”can't tell what's worse, him would being upset that it "was his fault" (seeing you as his property) or what actually happened (seeing you as the property of your family - old-timey religious brainwashing type on top of the "wasn't careful enough" victimblaming)
No. 1657819
>>1657810if you don't want to fully waste that money, pick out the meat and use that for a stir fry or some other meal tomorrow
at least that's what i'd do, but i'm also cheap af
No. 1657899
My sister. Had a mental breakdown about 3 years ago when her bf left after being locked down with her during covid, and basically just gave up on life it seems. Decided that me and my mum were the cause of all her problems because sometime during covid she decided she was 'trans' and 'autistic' and we never understood it, well forgive me because you seemed completely neurotypical and social before, just depressed. Started having delusions about us and her ex bf conspiring against her with the police to have her raped and killed, to this day said i 'pathologised' her by trying to get her help for psychosis. Bent over backwards running after her in the street when I was 8 months pregnant when she decided she was driving to her exbfs to attack him outside his house. We eventually after 2 fucking years managed to get a team into her flat, and they found the worst case of self neglect they'd ever seen. She was admitted to a crisis unit for 3 weeks. We went in and cleaned up. Her bedroom was a 6 foot pile of literal rotting rubbish. Compost, soil and ants on the bottom layers. Bathroom covered in a thick layer of cat shit with layers of clothes sandwiched in between, with maggots living in the shit. Flies everywhere. Her black, wet rotting bed covered in fleas. We cleaned it up. Since she got out she has kicked off on me because I "betrayed her trust" by telling our dad what was going on and that she was now iding as trans, he tried to support but that was wrong too. He was abusive when we were growing up but just paid off her mortgage that was 8 months in arrears and is helping with the 20k debt she racked up with no means to repay. Says she won't ever work again, working is stupid, and besides she cannot leave the house because shes autistic. Believes benefits will pay for everything, she'll get a new car on disability and debt is fine. Allows mum to spend her retirement money on buying her food and paying her bills. She had the gall to say to me that "I justify hurting those around me" because I reminded her that she publicly came out as trans and never asked me to keep it a secret. No response when I said if I don't care about you why am I one of two people in the world who would clean your flat in the state it was in? This is after telling me when I got pregnant that I was selfish and the only people who deserve to carry a pregnancy are trans women who CAN have uterus transplants, to 'alleviate their mental illness'. her words not mine. No interest in my daughter, her niece, because she hates children and finds them annoying and trigger her sensory issues.I really just feel like I can't understand her illness and thinking about it is like looking into a deep, ugly and dirty place. I genuinely feel like I hate her and just wish she would get better so I could fuck off and never speak to her again.
No. 1657906
File: 1691505839334.jpg (261.4 KB, 1280x960, tumblr_n98q1ek5zG1t0ltzso1_128…)
WHY do only my middle finger nails keep breaking!?! I finally grew my nails long and strong enough for a nice shape, why are YOU the only ones breaking!! You're a team, fucking act like it!! GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME! This makes me look like I am cutting one nail for fingering which tbh I wish I was but NO! I AM ALONE! WHO EVEn CUTS THEIR MIDDLE FINGER ONLY! I look like an INEPT lesbian!! REEEEEEEEEEEE
picrel mocks me
No. 1657912
>>1657727> i checked another 'woman' saying hi, and the profile seemed normal enough and then 'she' brings up her pregnant friend and how she's also pregnant.So it was a fetishizing tranny?
Also I get what you mean. I used to go on those Reddit friend finder subs. I found a couple of real women through there, and even played a game with one although it was kinda awkward, but those fizzled out like every other attempt at friend finder threads. Some of the men I've met are talkative and interesting enough to keep the conversation going but I ghosted them all because they're still men who use Reddit and it was only a matter of time before they revealed their true colors anyways. I stopped trying to make friends since then and a part of me wants to avoid getting too attached to internet people.
No. 1657923
>>1656668I disagree, I only have an internal monologue when I'm alone at home or on my own at work, and I feel that my workflow makes more sense and I can put together sentences quickly and eloquently when I'm just talking in my head. When I actually have to speak to another person, especially if I'm not prepared or the conversation is not routine, my monologue fails and I have to pause for several seconds to translate my thoughts into words. Especially if I am asked a question I wasn't prepared for, sometimes I have an answer but there are no words and I have to procure them out of nowhere because there was no monologue for it. I get tongue-tied very easily because of this but if I'm approaching someone with something I'm very direct and everything I say makes sense.
>how I'm imagining it is people envisioning their voice like reading out loudIt's like this, but very very fast because it's inside your own brain. I often repeat myself in my head because I think too quickly and I either am working through something important or even just having thoughts that I would like to savor more.
No. 1657928
File: 1691507918999.jpg (35.79 KB, 736x720, Clown cat.jpg)
I probably just ate like 700+ calories in granola cereal (that I didn't even enjoy! I made it too sweet!) because I didn't weigh it and I kept eating more than I should've. Arrrgghhhhh!
No. 1657943
Attractive people who complain that pretty privilege is just as hard as being unattractive because guys only approach them for shallow reasons, underestimate their intelligence, or because their female friends act jealous and shady towards them can cry me a fucking river because if you don't know how to use good judgment and utilize your gifts, you're not only dumb but lazy, perhaps because ironically your good looks have propped you up for so long that you take it for granted. I don't believe that attractive people lack developed personalities though, that's some of the stupidest coping BS i've ever heard. If some nasty bitches act shady towards you, take heart in the fact that they feel threatened by you thereby admitting your superiority and are petty to begin with which has nothing to do with you. Get better friends. As for men, well, you can pick and choose to your heart's content for the most part. You're getting all these options brought to you so if he turns out to be a shallow dickhead, hone your judgment skills, because there are ways to know if you're wasting your time much sooner. Even the ultra rare "decent" guys will typically be more inclined towards those they find attractive while also taking character into account. No one understands this better than women who've had a glow up or a glow down.
No. 1657952
>>1657793Wait, I thought you said he left you shortly BEFORE it happened. But you also say you told him the rape was the reason you were reluctant to have sex. But you guys were already broken up by the time the rape happened.
Did I misread something? Were you still sleeping with him even after he left you?
No. 1657958
>>1657899Her only illness is being a miserable selfish narc who is willing to humiliate herself so she can leech off of your elderly parents. Disgusting.
If I were you, I would look into conserving her. The team who took her dumb ass in for crisis would be excellent witnesses, and all the pictures you hopefully took are hard evidence. Get her on the tardbux since she's so adamant she's too retarded to do anything for herself ever again. Stick her in a group home and leave her there to rot. She'll magically find she's cured of that crippling autism and find herself a job, bet.
Your parents might fight you on this, but fuck them spending their money on her. Look into declaring bankruptcy for her as well, for the 20k debt.
No. 1657968
>>1657951More than sympathize with you. I've been friends with people like that and they SUCK. Absolute losers. Will randomly start seething with resentment because you did something innocuous that
triggered them but they're "too afraid" to just go "Hey, please don't do that nonna, I didn't really like that." Everything becomes about their anxiety. If they fuck up, they cry in your face and promise they aren't trying to make you feel bad. Annoying as. Get help
>>1657955>Can't imagine being this angry at someone else's anxiety or nervousnessSounds like someone's been walking through plants like a fool
No. 1657985
File: 1691512965560.gif (1.09 MB, 500x281, 7cb.gif)
>living at home again
>can't jill off because my room is still too messy (and my mom will bitch hardcore if i go in there and try to clean – i can't clean correctly, apparently)
>so i'm with my mom in the living area all the time
>and she's a crazy narc born-again christfag
>think i can just jill off in the bathroom sometimes
>do it yesterday
>"yeah, this'll work"
>try to do it today
>like a bunch of weird black bugs running around (we live in the country)
>so i can't lay down on the floor
>so i can't jill off
>right back to where i started
>toy needs charging anyway and i don't know where i'd even charge it because she's crazy
>can't jill off when she's out of the house either because she insists i go with her wherever she goes
i feel so miserable to be back home. she's a tough person to live with for more reasons than this but this is REALLY getting me. i don't have many joys in this life so the simple denial of my ability to get off is driving me insane. i NEED job right now holy shit
the way i see it i can jill one time at my aunt's place when she goes to sleep (my aunt is giving me driving lessons on the weekend – i crash there after we're finished).
anyway when i get my own place i'm just gonna jill for an entire weekend. hoping it's before the year ends, i hate this
No. 1657995
File: 1691513386799.png (224.62 KB, 500x375, 371442D9-3F30-4A0E-92B3-BE5874…)
Worried about my pup.. Who is actually 16 years old. She's still my little baby. Recently took her for her senior wellness exam at the vets, and she passed with flying colors. Just today they called with blood test results and asked for a urine sample asap, and I'm just so worried now. Can't get home to her until tomorrow night, she lives at my parents house. But I figure if I stay the night tomorrow and get up early with her, I can collect the sample and drop it off on Thursday morning.
I know she's old but to me, she's still a puppy. She has the energy of a puppy.. Even with her powder sugar face and cataracts. It hurts so much to know she's close to the end. She was my 10th birthday gift. The best gift I've ever received, the most perfect little pom-chi.
I don't think I'll ever want another dog. I just can't do it again, it hurts so, so badly at the end. I hope her liver is ok. I hope my baby gets to stay with us as long as she happily and comfortably can. God, my heart.
No. 1658002
File: 1691513694412.jpg (16.92 KB, 300x310, 300px-Professional_Retard.jpg)
>>1658000KEK you got me there
No. 1658015
File: 1691514367920.jpeg (48.76 KB, 563x549, 7AB52C7A-23B1-4214-814B-7E88B3…)
>>1658011Still cooler than you
No. 1658040
>>1657952i was still sleeping with him after he left me, because he wanted to and i was a socially retarded autist who let him take advantage of my love for him because i clung to the hope he just needed time, he hinted at that being the case several times. it was absolutely retarded of me, i know that now.
at the time i just clung to this hope that he’d change his mind and so i gave him sex whenever he wanted it, even though i felt reluctant (and i showed it) i didn’t put my foot down when he went ahead anyway because i wanted him to keep loving me
No. 1658068
>>1658040I'm really sorry to hear that, nonna.
You should cut him off asap. The comment about your sexual assault alone would be enough, but a man who would take advantage of you like he did is just disgusting and will continue hurting you for his own selfish needs. Focus on yourself and your friends right now. It might be difficult, but don't let him worm his way back into your life.
No. 1658069
File: 1691517924691.png (233.39 KB, 540x302, 1648197566795.png)
I've been dating multiple men at the same time. Too many times I have told my other options to fuck off to dedicate my attention and "loyalty" to one moid only to be completely fucked over by him intentionally or not. It works out better for me because I can get my needs met through multiple sources while appearing 'distant' and icey towards these men so they'll be tempted to chase and impress. I'm also a career professional and am legitimately busy a lot. Sorry, but men only abuse nice girls with good morals because they come off as too available which to men translates to them disrespecting you cause they think you are desperate…I would know. I ghosted a moid for a whole month because he was a drunk asshole to me and he begged and begged for me back and then even admitted he gained respect for me for putting him in check.
Anyways.
The latest bullshit is that I am selling a property and was dating around to see if a partner existed who would be willing to house me for a time so that I could pay off some debt–contributing domestically ofc because no moid does shit for free. I don't go into relationships with intention to use anyone, however, I am going to vet before I hand out titles and be sure that the next man I'm with is truly compatible for my long term aspirations.
One man I am seeing seemed genuinely sweet until I realized he has no hobbies outside of games and hangs around a bunch of other Peter Pan losers. Also he is not that fashionable and has ugly hair, I could do better. Still, he put in effort and even wanted to change for me, and his career was at least professional and his apartment was clean. He promised me that I could move in with him so I kept him as an option in spite of the cons.
Except he blew it by going to his rental office to talk about adding me to the lease and then foolishly confessing that I had a mixed dog on their "banned breed" list, which they then declined. I've seen fucking aggressive ass PITBULLS at this apartment complex, but my sweet and socialized dog won't be allowed cause this moron just couldn't say "Acceptabledogbreed-Mix." It was so hard to believe he didn't do it on purpose because I don't know how anyone could be so stupid or not be aware that apartment companies don't like certain breeds. So now I cannot stay there and it'll be a cold day in hell before I ditch my pet for a moid, and he's too much of a coward to have me stay with my pets under the table like what others in the complex obviously do. And furthermore he is not powerful nor brave enough to break lease to find another place that would accomodate me.
I cannot date someone this retarded and too thick to tell a white lie for the sake of our living together and my well being.
Idiot. Fucking idiot. Even mentioned how he'll "drive out to me" when I move away. LMAO as if!!!!!
Now imagine if I had put all my eggs in this dumbass's basket? I'd be fucked.
Thankfully a different moid has offered me his place to stay rent free and I might have even found a better paying job out his way. He's more attrative and seems to be on the same page insofar as marriage and kids. I still need to vet him, but I'm glad I have him as a backup.
But the Pickmeishas would screech and have my ass for daring to date multiple men at once cause that's not being LOyAlLl and CoMmMuNIcAtInGgg! Fuck around and find out how men will repay you for your fidelity and good will.
Don't give them that power.
No. 1658091
>>1658087It's the truth.
What's so unfathomable about it anyway? Do men not pay for things for you or something?
No. 1658105
>>1658097>>1658099I even said I was vetting and making sure these men were who I wanted to be with long term. Nowhere did I say it wasn't about quality when that's literally what I am after while I try to juggle problems that I have no family or friends to help with.
You're sounding very bitter.
No. 1658113
>>1658104To clarify I turn down men quite often.
And yeah, I'm looking for a new job because if things work out with this guy I will need a job in his area.
Don't you have a job lined up for when you plan to move new places? I haven't even accepted the offer yet, and again that's granted I wanna continue a relationship with this man.
Weird assumptions.
No. 1658124
>>1658119I turn down moids I don't like all the time including the one who blabbed about my dog.
Why are you so pressed about "flexing" and think you got one because you don't fuck moids you don't like? Get a grip.
>>1658120How do I "center moids" when I am just talking about my dating situation and how it pertains to my living one? I was just here to vent, not kick up an infight because you perceive some kind of "flex" threat here. Seriously just scroll on if you think it's bullshit. What's it to you?
No. 1658207
File: 1691523428808.jpeg (1.07 MB, 1125x1880, IMG_2082.jpeg)
Today I just really despise men
Pic very rel
No. 1658278
>>1658266say whatever you want. i may find certain terms annoying and want to voice that opinion, but it's not like my goal is to control others.
fwiw i don't find "masturbating" or "getting off" cringe inducing at all compared to "jill off" "jerk off" "schlicking" or "flicking the bean"
No. 1658307
File: 1691530830343.jpg (48.48 KB, 640x640, download (10).jpg)
I'm trying to paint lineart similarish to picrel using ym non dominant hand, and jesus I think I'm on the verge of killing myself. I'm just glad I only have to do it on one finger.
No. 1658311
File: 1691531078868.jpeg (28.19 KB, 370x496, Fvy6i2UaIAAGFJt.jpeg)
Damn this game (the tale of food) is showing no pity on a friendless loser like me. I only wanted the cat avatar but I need to invite 6 'friends' into this mini-event for it? They should've asked for my death instead, even that would've been easier. I want the cat so bad ugh.
No. 1658319
File: 1691532061337.jpg (9.49 KB, 300x300, 889f071a5ea4d14e457ccb4efb455c…)
Omg nonnies plz respond my friend just had a miscarriage I wanna know if I said the right things
>told her I'm sorry that happened
>I don't know if you are but don't blame yourself every mother I know has had atleast one and it's very common (I hear a lot of ladies blame themselves or other people might blame them so that's why I said this)
>take care of yourself and I'm here for you if you need anything
>told her I understand it's a traumatizing experience and will take time
>never apologize for suddenly disappearing sometimes all we can do is get through the day and that's okay
what else would be good to say ??! She is the most baby crazy person I know respectfully. she has always wanted to be a mom so I feel extra sad for her omfg. I'm fweaking out
No. 1658321
File: 1691532147093.jpg (213.04 KB, 828x1571, 1690651542334354.jpg)
Today i fought with my friend again. He's the type of over positive person that makes me really mad. I know he means well, but it makes me angry that whenever i complain about the state of the world and how shitty and dystopic it is his only response is ''tehe it depends on how you see it, you are just being negative''. He's a psychology major so he spews bullshit about muh meditation muh things you are grateful for. I swear to good i tried to do all his psychological bullshit and it just made me more depressed, as it i was trying to lie to myself. At this point i have accepted this timeline sucks and things are going to get worse, so i just spend my times drawing and playing vidya, waiting for out inevitable doom, but it still annoys me that he tries to convince me of his pseudo science bullshit, it's like he's trying really, really hard to convince me that the problem is me and not the state of the world. It's very annoying.
No. 1658328
File: 1691532769314.jpeg (27.37 KB, 522x588, hug.jpeg)
>>1658314Aww thanks
nonnie you're so kind ♥ But it's too much work signing up for a game and I don't really think I deserve the effort, honestly I'm not even completely sure how this event works so I have no idea if the link would keep me anonymous too. I'll just try making new 6 IDs or something.
No. 1658336
File: 1691533701004.gif (1.92 MB, 498x373, cat-computer.gif)
I fucking hate gatekeepers I met this autistic troon who fucking cries in the discord server im in about me blocking him since he was being a retard then fucking crying to mods who force me to talk it out (I don't even want to? But I get work there so) fucker just cried about waaah diz waz my safe space and You are making it unsuitable for me
I don't care? Nobody likes you because you whine all day your drawings are just coom rope yourself already troon.Just don't talk to me. I blocked him again
No. 1658380
File: 1691537432130.jpg (29.04 KB, 647x590, 1671259357001.jpg)
>>1658362yeah, exactly. It wouldnt even bother me if me if he just said ''well i dont see it that way'' but it's him outright saying that i am wrong and that his way of thinking is the only correct one that bothers me, specially because i end up telling him in detail the objective facts and he's still just ''nope, you are just too pessimistic''. I wanted to punch him when he started talking about a book of a guy that fought nazis and lived several wars, when my point was that we shouldnt be living in such a shitty timeline considering we arent on fucking world war times anymore, and that it's beyond crazy the world is such a clown world were trannies can assault little girls in bathrooms and billionaires can buy our identity for 50 bucks without repercusion(the talk started because of world coin). At least it showed me how much i like him as a friend because i have cut people out of my life for way less.
No. 1658422
>>1655983You know what anon, I know it’s a couple days later but I totally get how you feel about your grandmother. Mine is the same about my appearance but it’s not enough of an issue that it impacts our relationship, you just know it’s something they’re going to say is all. My oma hates my dreadlocks that I’ve had for over 12 years. Always says she wishes she could cut them off. But that’s it. It’s just the one petty issue that you just want to vent about and that’s it. It’s not the advice thread so other anons ought to lay off. Sometimes a minor annoyance just needs to vented about and now you (hopefully) feel better. Same with my grandmother, they are of a different generation and are always going to have their opinions and we have ours. This thread is supposed to be for venting, which you did. My oma isn’t
toxic in any way, but it is annoying having to hear about my appearance constantly. Once again, they are from a different generation so all we can do is take it in stride, much like the anons in this thread need to do. It’s venting. We can say our piece without being judged, that’s what it’s supposed to be for. There’s an advice thread for people who ask but it was my impression this particular thread is for being able to get shit off our chest without opinionated responses. But you can’t please everyone so it’s pointless getting upset. That being said, anon, you should also remember that your grandmother is much older and bodies change, it’s much harder to lose weight as an older person on top of medical issues that come with age. Don’t hold it against her, time is too precious to waste being upset. I hope you continue your weight loss journey and also hope you can come back to this thread and vent when you are annoyed by something again without other anons being too critical.
No. 1658441
File: 1691541412182.jpeg (135.04 KB, 750x901, E528FB27-C438-44A5-A8B4-B56BCF…)
My Twitter account got locked for a tweet I made weeks ago that just said “are you ready to die (insert Twitter user who was terrorizing radtwt). My account was private at the time of tweeting it. Are the cops going to show up to my house and arrest me for threatening some Twitter theyfab I’m freaking out how did she even discover that tweet
No. 1658453
>>1658441a lot of twitter users will search for whatever the name people are referring to them with on the site itself. she probably self searches 24/7
>>1658433it's extra sad when a woman loses a baby she really wants and is prepared for. i hope your friend can have a baby someday
No. 1658458
File: 1691542220078.gif (345.44 KB, 112x112, smooch.gif)
>>1658355Oh, then here's the link:
https://taleoffood.madfungame.com/recordmycatlife/?code=vLbi4dj6You apparently need to create a madfun account, then the game account, click on the link while you're logged in and share the cat card, that's why I believe it's a bit too messy and takes too much effort, so you don't really have to do that if you don't want to, but thank you so much anon. I'm honestly surprised you nonnas are helping me, sometimes I wish I had you all as my friends irl.
No. 1658463
>>1658422Thank you anon, I appreciate this. I'm sorry you have a similar issue with your grandma nonna. I think a lot of people have that one older family member who makes comments they don't really appreciate, but it doesn't change the other aspects of their person that make us love them so much.
I do want to talk to her about it next time we hang out we eachother, which will be hopefully soon. I admit that I don't know how to handle conflict or a disagreement without being dramatic so I just avoid it. I think it will be good for me to tell her how I feel about it though. I know she doesn't actually mean to hurt me and tbh in her head I think she's just giving me tips. And I do feel fucking terrible for saying that she is fat. She has diabetes and like you said she's obviously older. I just run my mouth when I'm in my feelings, but I would never say that to her.
>>1658427My initial reply shouldn't have been so aggressive, true, but the way those anons acted was just kinda bizarre. Not to mention I was obviously already irritated and upset when I made that post. It's not even about defending my grandma from strangers on an imageboard really, it's just that anons like that fuck up this thread and site in general and you can tell they're the type of anons who like causing infights because of them accusing another random anon of being me.
No. 1658509
File: 1691544115267.jpeg (228.48 KB, 719x468, F6FF8433-78BF-41E3-9ECF-377270…)
I can’t relate to 99% of the female population and I don’t mean that in a quirky NLOG way I mean I fucking WISH I could be a normal woman but I can’t. The only people who have ever been consistently nice to me are autistic scrotes and MTF trannies but there are no men on earth who want to be friends with women they don’t want to fuck. I relate to the women on here sometimes but only the most insane women ever visit this website because it’s literally 4chan for women. I immersed myself in radfem spaces thinking it would get rid of my desire to be a man and I try so hard to not hate women but holy FUCK it gets hard sometimes. I hate these Onlyfans thots who post half nude photoshoots of themselves wearing toddler clothes and try to gaslight you into believing they’re not profiting off pedophilia by telling you that you’re the pedo if you see anything wrong with it. I hate and I mean HATE these teenage mean girl Regina George types who audibly mock me within earshot and harass me on the street that won’t let me be a GNC autistic goth freak who is covered in self harm scars in peace and I hate that I don’t have the balls to talk back to them and I hate that even if I did that would probably make it worse and this is 99% of young girls. I hate these retarded GSA libfems who walk up to me at a party and ask me what my fucking pronouns are before even asking my name. I hate the conservative redneck chicks I’m “friends” with who I had to prove my worth to by acting homophobic around them because they automatically assumed I was a genderspecial tranny. I hate these bihet libtarded women who gush about their “golden retriever boyfriends” and complain about how they “don’t feel visibly queer enough to be welcomed in queer spaces” when I’m “visibly queer” and I have to deal with the social consequences of it every day and even though this is partially my fault because I dress androgynously my personality is so offputting and intimidating and “masculine” that straight women basically treat me like a defective dickless man anyways and they act more scared of me than they do of their moids even though their moids are 100 times more likely to actually murder them in cold blood than the most masculine autistic horny violent woman alive I fuckin ghate everyone and everything and I want to rip my face off and throw it at someone
No. 1658536
>>1658530Nayrt and this is kind of retarded but nona please break my desire to be a moid, I know it’s disgusting but I feel so vulnerable and uncomfortable in my body that I just wish I was a huge strong intimidating moid so I didn’t get sexually harassed or targeted because of my sex. I know its a downgrade because moids are fucking retarded and I despise them but at the same time I feel so unsafe in my body that its scary even leaving the house after what I’ve experienced, and I know I wouldn’t have experienced it if I were a moid. I need to break this feeling out of me, I want to love being a woman but its so fucking terrifying to me, to even look in the mirror and see my small body. I’m not even 5 feet tall but then I see these huge 6’5 moids who can work out and be strong as fuck within a few months and it takes me years just to be half as strong as them, and its like… I really hate my body but its biologically impossible for me to change it in the way I want to. How do I stop this feeling because it’s really disgusting and I hate feeling vulnerable every fucking day
I need to know how being a moid would be a complete downgrade because to me the thought of not being targeted or sexually harassed due to my sex would be a way better upgrade and negates all the downgrades I can think of
No. 1658541
File: 1691546700468.jpg (17.12 KB, 260x480, 331073899_1192720591562054_691…)
I hate that I never learned how to take care of my hair. We were only allowed to shower/bath once a week and it's not that my hair does mind that, it would have been nice to have the choice to just wash my hair whenever I want. My mother could tell me nothing about getting healthy and nice hair, care for it, styling it, and so on. The only thing she ever did was tell me how much she wished to be born a man (she should have transitioned back then and die). The hair dresser was a "friend" of my mother and came to our house. I've always had curly-wavy hair and I got a haircut as a child that looked so horrible, people at school would bully me for my hair until I graduated. So, the only thing I learned about my hair is how to hate it. I haven't been to a hair dresser in 20 years and I don't have the money at the moment, I have been wearing a ponytail 24/7 for the last 20 years and I just don't know how to care for my hair. I want a nice haircut, maybe a new hair colour, I just want to know how to care for my hair and how to style it. I'm still not over the fact that my parents taught me nothing except how to lie without anyone noticing it.
No. 1658545
File: 1691547146316.png (553.61 KB, 549x644, trannies.png)
>Look at some top 7 list for highest grossing films with female directors out of curiosity
>The only ones directed purely by women are Wonder Woman (2017) and Barbie
>The rest are directed by both a woman and a man (Captain Marvel, Frozen 1 & 2, and Brave) which was ok but kind of misleading
The most infuriating thing tho is that they had the fucking tranny Wachowski brothers in there. Don't get me wrong I liked the matrix but these things are not women.
No. 1658559
File: 1691548188982.jpg (34.41 KB, 412x639, 050df21a0e9e932a96e85a1f43a915…)
>>1658541I'll help you out anon, I've the same texture as you.
>HaircutsShort hair is a bad option for us because it just "puffs" automatically. Length weights down this type of texture making it more manageable, so I suggest you letting it grow a little. Don't do layers unless you want your hair to get curlier
>StylingDon't use too much heat, use serum/ hair oils to keep it shiny and neat. Don't brush it when dry, only when damp, use a wide tooth brush, to avoid breakage
>ColorsUnless you're a natural blonde don't go for lighter colors, go for colors you can maintain with ease
No. 1658589
File: 1691552226761.gif (1.73 MB, 200x149, w.gif)
In love with someone overseas but also deeply love my gf of many years. Want to go on the hero's journey to meet my crush but don't want to wreck this happy home. Yes I know this is shitty to even entertain, I will get right with God and do the correct thing but this crush is pretty overwhelming rn.
No. 1658604
File: 1691554128012.jpeg (25.67 KB, 400x379, IMG_2590.jpeg)
>>1658597Good question
nonnie, infatuation would maybe be a better word- physical attraction at first sight? I know it’s obviously surface level and fleeting that’s why I won’t grenade my whole life over it, just something I have to go through.
No. 1658667
>>1658509>>1658536I don't get people like you. You say you don't relate to women yet complain about the same things every women complain. Why do you all think stereotypes from movies come from? Because we all had to deal with a Regina George, we all had a jealous friend, we all struggled to relate to what society sees as "feminine" at some point, we all have to balance different groups of people in our lives with different interests and stands, because there isn't such a thing as finding a perfect group of people who you connect 100%. You might find very close friends over the years, but those are very rare and will be very few. That's not a woman's exclusive experience either. You feeling vulnerable and scared of it is unfortunately the most female experience you have, we are all scared and frustrated. The issue is that you all keep saying the solution is being a man, when men are the fucking problem. If men didn't rape and beat women, we wouldn't need to be scared. You know you won't be a man and focusing on this idea is delusional and futile. Look for viable solutions to your fears, like carrying a gun, self defense classes, being aware of the places you go, always send your locations to friends and so on. Life is full of uncertainties and what if you were a big hulking man, you could still just get hit by a car or get cancer. They aren't the undistructable gods you think they are. Living is being vulnerable,its uncertain and scary. Moid should be accountable for becoming extra variables to our fears in life,THEY are the issue, it's not our fault. Stop blaming yourself for being short or vulnerable, start blaming them from taking advantage.
No. 1658676
File: 1691564965674.jpg (35.37 KB, 498x400, 0664.JPG)
Anons who thirst for people like XQC or idubbz are gross
No. 1658700
File: 1691571508102.png (90.03 KB, 309x319, pain.png)
At what point do you stop trying to pursue someone? I met this cute girl at a party and she gave me her number. I was supposed to meet up with her last week, but she flaked out at the last minute. I asked her if we could meet up this week instead, but she said she's busy too. She also takes forever to respond to my texts and I always have to text her first. I thought she was genuinely interested in me but maybe she thinks I'm creepy and weird IDK
No. 1658712
>>1658667AYRT Thank you for this, it helps to hear that, you're right that they are the problem. It's hard not to wish I could be something different to feel less scared, but it is futile. I'm just so terrified of being around them and even going outside, and its all due to my sex so it really is hard not to wish I was not a woman, but you are right. I'd buy a gun to feel more secure but I'm legally not allowed to (i'm not a felon though), but taking self-defense classes is a good idea.
When I think about myself without thinking about the outside world, just myself as a woman, I do love myself, I appreciate the body I have been born with. And now that I think about it more I am happy being a woman. Its moids who ruin everything. Its moids who make us hate being women and I can't let those scummy
abusive pieces of shit take that away from me too.
I just want to go outside without feeling scared and always on edge.
No. 1658725
My mom is a certified caretaker and has been taking care of my grandma who has dementia.
Recently, she asked me to help her because she had an appointment and didn't want to leave my grandma alone. She said all I would have to is sit there, and that she would make sure my grandma had bathed and eaten before hand. I said okay, but I was a bit worried because I'm a paranoid fuck that kept imagining all the possible ways I can fuck up.
Nothing terrible happened, but in all honesty I don't think my grandma has much time left. My grandma is incredible at hiding her poker face, but whenever I left the room I could heat her starting to cry. Whenever I headed back it would stop and she'd smile as if she was completely fine. I just didn't know what to do, so I tried to sit by her and stuff.
I'm scared that my mom will have to be the one there alone when my grandma passes on, it's not fair. She already was the only child there to see her father die in hospice. She took care of the funeral and everything.
That being said, from what she's told me, it's a complicated relationship, my grandma was very physically abusive to her as a child, but nowadays she's very docile. I just don't know how my mom feels about it, she doesn't like talking about it.
I wonder if I should be helping her more, should I ask if I could help? But am I even able to help? I have no training, what if I end up making shit worse? What if I'm not careful enough and my grandma falls? What about medications? And at the same time, I'm a coward, I don't want to be the one to find my grandma dead either. But I don't want it to be my mom.
No. 1658758
File: 1691581156235.jpg (20.43 KB, 563x417, 07deb76b12b839debbee5eb7c70166…)
>>1658700cut her loose, sorry nona. she sounds flaky and annoying and probably will only become moreso if it goes anywhere
No. 1658761
File: 1691581319703.png (44.41 KB, 705x428, IMG_2301.png)
What do I do if a mentally disturbed boy has decided to 'stalk' me at work. The thing is, after a while of him clearly and blatantly doing this, I've decided to 'stalk' him back (social media). So it's a game of fucked up hide and seek. But I don't want him stalking me and I don't understand how he even knows I'm there half the time. I know he's mentally disturbed because others have told me he's very autistic and neurotic, and a close family member of his has died in the past few years. He also seems to be a serial crusher, anywhere from girls his age to actual MILFs. I looked at his Instagram follows and basically have a good gauge of his mental illness. Why me, though? Because I accidentally talked to him once? He sat across from my water bottle when I went to go to the bathroom and it felt too awkward to move it.
The thing is, the few times we've spoken, the conversations were mostly bearable. They were just about work or about mundane things; nothing inappropriate. He asked polite questions and didn't focus too much on himself. The only reason they are kind of annoying is because he's mopey and sad. He sighs to get my attention, but I don't give it to him. He started stalking me around the workplace a few months ago then stopped but now he's started again. All he really does though is smile at me. I've taken to watching him when I can, and he seems like a hard worker and kind and helpful to others, and he talks a lot to older male and female coworkers. But the other things I've heard about him are concerning- not mean or violent, but just demented. I feel sorry for him and pity him, but I don't want to. I want him to be strong enough to just focus on himself and not focus any of his energy on looking for me just to glance at me.
Anyone else experience this? If so, I have questions:
>is he using my eye contact for dopamine?
>should I just ignore him completely?
>should I ask advice from a girl he once had a crush on?
>should I beat him up?
No. 1658769
>>1658761Go to HR and start building a case, in the event your "stalking back" games and no hard boundaries with this fool makes things escalate.
You're treating a potential threat like a quirky anime episode.
No. 1658777
File: 1691582028688.png (111.88 KB, 1024x868, P6AqdK-1503167594.png)
>>1658769I dunno if I want to report this poor sod to HR, you're right though that I shouldn't stalk him back, but I just hate being left in the unknown. I should just start ignoring him and see if he stops first. I dunno if he's that much of a threat, but he is male so who knows.
No. 1658782
>>1658777So you'll joke around bullying and beating up the poor sod but reporting his behavior to HR is crossing the line somehow?
I don't just mean "threat" as in this guy will go insane and cause physical harm. I mean a professional threat as in this fuck starts to have unrequited feelings and spreads rumors about you and does things to make you consider quitting your job if his bullshit wouldn't get you fired. It's no joke.
No. 1658788
>>1658786I
think he's the type to keep it to himself. There were others before me that weren't the
victims of vicious rumors but I guess there's always a first. I should just ignore him and see if that works. It probably will. He's probably used to being 'rejected' that way. If that doesn't work, HR it is. I can always get other coworkers to vouch for me, in HR or outside of HR. Apparently he once fell in love with an actual mother who was in a bad relationship with her husband and offered to like, be with her and help her. The fuck? I wonder if he was reported to HR for
that No. 1658799
File: 1691583800030.jpeg (10.58 KB, 211x239, images (1).jpeg)
My family are my biggest haters. If I had a thread on here, they'd spam it all day. Kinda sad I will never be able to have an online presence because my mother would pull a full margo.
No. 1658863
File: 1691591267614.jpeg (90.92 KB, 638x947, IMG_4543.jpeg)
>making breakfast
>father insults my appearance
>”wtf you’re an ass”
>mother backs him up
>sister insults me too
And I was having an okay morning
No. 1658870
>>1658786It also pisses me off because I told my sister about all of this and she told me I
have to be nice to him. Why does she care more about some random boy she has never met’s feelings over my own? She still thinks I should be nice to him. Even worse, she wants me to date him.
No. 1658888
File: 1691593585209.jpg (91.75 KB, 1241x1207, 20230307_180125.jpg)
I started thinking about my sister and her adhd having ass, then I started thinking about all the other people who can never be patient about shit, simple shit such as growing your hair out. No, gotta get extensions that eventually fucked up her hair, now she's throwing a pity party because her already naturally fine hair is fucked and has to be cut into a very short pixie due to the damage. She cannot possibly just grow out her own nails, so: see above. I don't have that much against these things but it's with these adhd types that it fucking annoys, especially when it's stuff you can genuinely just wait out, you don't even need to DO anything, just fucking wait? No, never, you HAVE TO HAVE IT NOW, even that would be okay I guess but then there's damage and they act like it was such a big surprise. Gotta change hair color monthly, do it in the most dumb way, oh you wanna go from black to platinium in a day? You wanna do it the heathier way, so you might have at least more than 2 hairs lef- okay no, let's fuck it up and then cry. I've gone through all colors as a teen and I always used color theory and had stronger hair, but a lot of it was just waiting around and being realistic about it all, same with everything really. She whines how she cannot lose weight, still eats like shit and when she's seen me lose ungodly amount of weight due to hard work and actual self discpline, she just says it's so much harder for her, bitch I was so much bigger than you. It's not harder for you, my shit doesn't even work well, I actually had stuff against me, stuff you do not have, you are just fucking impatient and immature. I know I sound petty but I'm sure at least one nona can get what I mean by this "I want it now and I refuse to do it the smart way", Jesus fucking christ I'm so annoyed today.
No. 1658921
File: 1691595878946.jpg (95.19 KB, 700x1064, Unexplainable-Cat-Images-Memes…)
>>1658566This a lovely idea, actually! Thank you anon. I love cooking and especially for her, so that would actually be fantastic!
>>1658863I'm sorry anon, that's terrible. I hope your day gets better.
No. 1658933
>>1657295Sounds like an attempt to enmesh you in mom and brothers emoshuns Mom sounds emotionally immature im sorry
The passive stuff is in hopes you do the hard work for her. If you’ve intervened in the past, like asked what’s wrong, did you find yourself taking on a therapist role?
No. 1658967
File: 1691598753617.jpeg (56.54 KB, 543x429, IMG_2201.jpeg)
I did some bad psychs (possibly research chemicals sold to me as “mushrooms” in a chocolate bar) almost a year ago and had drug-induced psychosis. Episode lasted maybe 4-6 hours? Ever since then I’ve been mostly sane and I’m always aware when I start getting psychosis thoughts (I quit weed because of it but occasionally I even get them while sober). Like I know it’s fake paranoid stuff my brain comes up with and I don’t allow myself to fall for it but I still get those thoughts. I had a therapist and she validated me but at the end of the day talking about it to someone who doesn’t fully understand doesn’t help. Is there any nona here who has been through a traumatic psychotic episode whether it’s drug induced or through mental illness? It’s so lonely and I just want to know if things get better or if I have to adjust my life around this.
No. 1658973
>>1658970I literally mentioned having a therapist already kek. All I want is to know if anyone else has had this experience. I guess I should be clear. I don’t have ongoing psychosis. It’s like I get randomly
triggered by something that reminds me of my psychotic episode and it makes me feel weird and paranoid. I’m already diagnosed with PTSD from this. Again, just want to know I’m not alone.
No. 1658985
>>1658967there is a mental health thread here
>>>/g/141299 maybe it's a better place to find people with the same experience, as I don't think you are alone in what you going through
No. 1658986
>>1658967Aw,
nonny. I have PTSD and when younger I had minor hallucinations. As I got older I only hallucinated when I was stressed and started having constant nightmares that made me really tired. Sometimes back then I would be fine for months and then just randomly think about something creepy and suddenly feel extremely scared, like when you’re a kid and you randomly get scared in the dark and feel like the blanket will protect you. I always knew when I was hallucinating. Now I haven’t had one in several years, I think because through journaling before bed I vastly improved my sleep and my living conditions are much better now so I’m not
triggered as much. Basically for mental health induced stuff you can recover basically completely, but I don’t know if it’s the same for drugs.
No. 1659007
>>1658985That's a good suggestion, but nonna was specifically looking for anons to talk about drug-induced psychosis with, which is not as common as non-drug related mental illness. I'd suggest she make a thread, but idk if that's too niche. But it's not like we don't have other niche threads floating around, waiting to be revived?
>>1658967>>1658981I'm sorry about your experiences, nonnas. I know there was another anon who experienced what you're talking about, earlier in the thread when the shroomfag was acting up, so I do think there are many others out there to talk to. Hopefully they find you! Maybe try making that thread.
No. 1659046
File: 1691604319773.jpg (127.79 KB, 1080x1177, Screenshot_20230809_135502_Red…)
What is with men and the weird revenge fantasies, "oh yeah, you don't want me? Now you'll end up old and alone!"
passport bro thing ive been seeing has been less about them finding wives and more about sticking it to the "American whores" who… didn't want them anyways. It's like they are trying to reject preemptively to save themselves from rejection. The cope is unreal. "Please don't go!!" At least I didn't have to go overseas to get married. Frustrating part is they won't actually leave because they're all poor anyways, they'll just cope about how they're going to do it any minute now and then continue to make sexist remarks on social media
No. 1659052
File: 1691604570502.jpeg (17.99 KB, 198x158, IMG_2540.jpeg)
>making conversation with mom
>'oh, i had to go to the doctor again today because my piercing is infected again, i got antibiotics'
>'who took you?'
>i tell her it was my boyfriend
>'so you made him take time off work to pick you up and drop you off?'
>'…no, i told him and he offered, we went during his lunch break'
>she scoffs
>'oh, sure he did'
>i say okay and leave because he literally did, i don't know what else i'm supposed to say
>in my room thinking about it
>remember a memory i buried of when she stalked my boyfriend on facebook after i mentioned he was my boyfriend
>remember her telling me she did it with my golden-child cousin she's obsessed with
>remember her mentioning they thought he photoshopped his pictures because 'he was too good looking' [the 'for me' implied]
>realise she literally must have said in front of my cousin that she can't believe my boyfriend looked like that because i'm such an uggo in her eyes
>also just yanked my hair around my infected piercing and it hurt so bad
>mfw
No. 1659070
>>1659065thank you
nonnie! i especially appreciate your well wishes about my piercings! you're very cute ♥
No. 1659143
>>1659134Based.
You know when something is completely scrotey? Farmers will understand what it means, but I doubt normies would.
No. 1659145
>>1659102we are very similar, nonna, except that I finally overcome being suicidal most of the time, only took me over 20 years myself, kek. Maybe, be yourself? I know it's a tough choice if people always like you for being someone you are not, but it seems to make you miserable to have to act all the time. It helped me to accept that I have these thoughts and that I'm not this friendly, funny girl without emotions people thought I was. If they are your friends they should be able to handle the real you. Maybe try to look into the meds you are taking, perhaps there are some that are better for your brain. Don't know if you are more suicidal around the time you get your period, if so, it helped me to change the things I eat and taking iron supplements, sounds stupid, but it helped so damn much and I wish someone would have told me that years ago.
If you can, maybe take a week or a month away from all the people around you, so you wouldn't have to act anymore and can focus on healing. I seriously believe that you can find a way to survive these suicidal thoughts and I really hope you will feel way better in the near future.
No. 1659151
>>1659120>>1659145Thank you both for your kind words. <3 they mean a lot, trust me, I appreciate your advice.
Today was the first day that something clicked inside of my head and I thought for the first time that I wouldn’t care that much if I lose them all because they don’t know the real me (even if I’m the one who’s hiding all the time).
While I was watching her, I just kept thinking that if they don’t like the worst part of me or if they can only see what they want to see, maybe they don’t need me at all and I’m fine with that. I was so afraid of being alone that I lost myself being someone likeable instead of being myself.
Again, thank you so much.
No. 1659206
File: 1691616130863.jpeg (17.02 KB, 265x275, 752F1261-65F0-4891-A5F3-126FD3…)
Tried to vent on Reddit in a sub about people undecided about kids and that my reason was less that I don’t want kids at all and more that I don’t feel like I could find a good father for my children. All I got back was “It’s 2023 you don’t need a partner to be a mother”. Like how dismissive and delusional do you have to be to think that purposefully choosing to be a single parent is a good idea for most people? It’s not a life I want to live and either I find a decent moid (extremely unlikely) or I just end up alone. Financially I have a good nest egg but my current cash flow probably won’t really ever be enough to support two humans comfortably. I can make a good life for myself but I don’t know if I’ll ever be making the big bucks which isn’t fair to a child. I barely have a support system as a single woman, so I’d either end up dropping off the kid at daycare or hoisting them on my mother a majority of the time which isn’t fair to anyone. I hate the idea of tying myself to some shithead moid for the rest of my life but I also hate the idea of having a kid by myself and not being able to actually be there for them because I had to girlboss motherhood or whatever. Yeah I’m playing by patriarchy rules but I don’t feel like I have a choice.
No. 1659216
>>1659206Reddit is always delusional about real life, you can see it in the AITA posts where someone is very clearly an asshole but the posts are "NTA!! Prioritize yourself above all others! Being accommodating to any degree is not your problem, but also everyone should accommodate you!"
They're also delusional about what single motherhood is like. I've seen people say the most outlandish shit talking like they know everything and then I check they're profile and they post to teenagers
No. 1659220
I'm one of those people who have pretty low standards for looks. I had this mindset for the longest time, because I used to think that you should try giving someone who is being earnest about you at least one chance. But of course, over time from early teens to now, I went through some pretty garbage people in order to figure out what I wanted from a partner. And after those horrible experiences, started laying down some healthy foundations. But still, right now my standards are still depressingly low. Well, at least that only comes to looks. I am okay with moids who are overweight or even borderline obese. In fact, I prefer that (because their self esteem is stupid low and I'm all they have in their world and I don't care enough to care. And clutching some fat is pretty great.). However, my biggest issue right now is with personality. I'm like the hyper steroid version of expecting a 6 foot chiselled statue but with their behaviors instead. I love spergs so much, I am one as well. It's so much easier to connect with people who think the same way as I do. Especially moids. I get it, but there's such a flavor to women spergs… Obviously I don't relate to every single one of those and even hate some of them because of other reasons… but the ones that do work with me because our interests ever so slightly overlap and thethinking goes the same way… It goddamn turns into fireworks. It's usually women too. Cause sperg women can't get fucking 'hi what's up?' from a stranger until you know what they want and then a whole ass logical explanation to any rant or topic the both of us likes. Goddamn, I'm disabled in empathy too but the moment you sperg to me in a feminine way, I'll fucking melt. Am an uncover terf, seen TiFs and TiMs, they can't fucking capture the harshness and empathy that's so special to these women…. I know EXACTLY what they're doing. It is half performance but also mostly genuine.
Sadly I gaslighted myself because sperg women are so hard to find with my hobbies and all that I went out with a moid and had a decent few years until I realized that he was a doormat and then I started to fantasize about women while I sucked on his tits, pretending I was sucking on a woman's. We're not together now, so whatever. But alone… I think about getting close with a fellow female sperg that is somewhat like me… and then getting with her, all that shit. I'm not a lesbian because of my previous crushes and shit and because of the spicy straights and the scrotes and my flat mindset. I started to hate everyone and become a ~ femcel ~. I get the stereotype of bi girls, but I really want those shitty bis to die too. For real, even when I was into men, it was so pragmatic. But for women… Am I moid brain poisoned? But anyway,It hurts to even say that all of my past horrible experiences were with men in the first place. I know lesbians will call me a slut anyway, but fuck it at this point I… I just want some comfort from an autistic woman who likes me platonically… Like me.. Who speaks the same language… I don't care if you're far away… I'm from a place where I can't connect without running into TiFs who hasn't transitions aka lmao South East Asia.
Anyway my main point of my vent was that I met a cool girl from here, no less that I thought was really cool and she hasn't replied to me in 4 days so I should assume she ghosted me even though I loved sperging to her and she also replied to me in long messages… I guess she just wasn't into it. Kind of hurts, because I could tell from the get go that we would be great close friends, purely platonically. But I also won't deny that I had all sorts of e-dating fantasies about her even though we knew each other for barely months plus, I need to an-hero I am so pathetic FUCK
idk if you'll ever see this nonna, but if you don't want to see me because it sounds like I love my ex crushes when I sperged… I don't. Ask me and I'll give you the most direct report ever. I can only hope that it is so direct it wraps from weird to normal and quirky again. I WILL sperg about how you… literally made the chemicals in my brain rise when you replied and when I thought about you in impossible situations…. While I sound like I'm in love with people I knew and whatnot but I'm not… Honestly. I wanna know more about you platonically. B-But I think about you romantically too… But I worry that maybe you rejected me because I didn't want to de-anon that quick? I… don't know…
Anyway I realized that moid spergs are even more self centered than I am, and they're so retarded that they can't even vocalize their emotions and wants in words. Which led to relationships where I was the only the person bringing up issues and the future because apparently I'm the only one who has a brain to think that far even though I am FUCKING FUCKED IN EQ? WHAT THE FUCK?
I really want a nona to love me like me who isn't ill as fuck
No. 1659275
>>1658422Actually
>>>/ot/1650373 is the thread for that. People post in vent bc they WANT interaction, otherwise they'd use the other thread.
>>1659249Anons were responding to a post in the thread while staying on topic. The actual "wrong" move is getting pissed off and starting an infight because you're "sensitive"; don't make excuses for not being able to control yourself.
No. 1659285
>>1659281That should be what it is, but like last year (or whenever that thread what made) anons antagonizing anons who were trying to vent and derailing thread became such an issue that we needed a thread to curb it (cause jannies suck). Then they would
still go to the Get It Off Your Chest thread to infight and it didn't even become a bannable offense until like the last two threads.
No. 1659301
I was literally on my way home from work today when my dad texted me to ask where I was and asked me to join him for happy hour because he was at some spot close to where I worked. I snubbed him off at first but then I felt guilty about it so I was like 'ok fine' and took the next train back down and met him at the bar. It wasn't rowdy he was just on his second drink (he's not really a lightweight) but I was just… so fucking uncomfortable the whole time. He was going on and on about when I was just a baby and he would record my first steps, and how he just wanted to make memories and have a father-daughter moment. That's fine and dandy, but I think we have just find father-daughter moments when we're driving somewhere and having banter in the car. I absolutely hate dealing with my dad when he's drunk, actually I just hate dealing with anyone when they're drunk.
We finally leave and on the way home he keeps telling me I have to drive to Costco and I refuse. I do have my license but I rarely get to drive and we live in a not very car friendly city. I know the route to Costco and I've already noted that it would be a difficult drive for me (highway, this one really tight turn under this bridge, it's also evening rush hour so LOTS of cars and I'm already an anxious driver). I've had some practice in my dad's car but I mainly learned in a small dinky little sedan and his car is a big ass SUV. It's like, I'm already on a learning curve trying to relearn how to drive in a much bigger car, and now you want to throw me on the highway and even simple side streets absolutely riddled with cars? We were just at the supermarket and I told him we could've just gotten milk at the supermarket instead of going all the way to Costco for it and he INSISTS that he also NEEDS his croissants from Costco (our local markets don't have croissants and he eats them every morning for breakfast). This was the last straw apparently. Now he's throwing his tantrum and is yelling at me, saying "WHY ARE YOU SO MAD?" like I wasn't forced into accompanying his drunk self at the bar and on the subway ride home and being extremely uncomfortable and annoyed the whole time. No, the man needs his croissants.
I know I have to figure out how to drive his car anyway, and it's not that I mind driving, but it's like I'm being thrown off the deep end. That, and this whole evening has been a shitshow.
No. 1659306
>>1659278nonna its obvious but you gotta let him go. If he can't even bother to have a 15 min phonecall with you he doesn't give a shit. Its a huge red flag bc when you really need him, he will not be there for you
Don't waste your time, effort and feelings on a moid who doesn't treat you like a queen nonna
No. 1659321
>>1659313yeah, I guess I just need to learn to ignore her voice in my head
(blogpost continues)
I also need to figure out a plan for something, she is a nanny so she puts this baby bed in my room and it's bright red and damn large and really
triggers me
there is no baby in it but it just reminds me the babies in my room growing up and the lack of privaxy that followed, I just can't stand its presence besides it being ugly
she has to keep it for shows when her superviser comes because she pretends the baby sleeps there (she was kind enough to put all the babies in her room)
I feel like I could fold it and put it away when I'm here, and unfold it when I leave, I hope that won't be too bothersome for me
No. 1659324
>>1659321I mean I wish I could just permanently put it away and have her unfold it herself when the supervisor rings our doorbell
but I know what her reaction will be if I say that, she'll yell and scream
She's just very stressed about that supervisor (understandable since she could lose her job) but I feel like having to bear that ugly bright red bed 364 days a year when it gets seen once or twice a year is pushing it
Am I the asshole?
No. 1659338
File: 1691626221165.gif (1.26 MB, 360x270, 1685279871494659.gif)
Over the last year or so, I've had increasing problems with sudden excruciating back pain while walking even short distances, dizzyness and confusion and in extreme cases, my legs and arms stop working and I fall to the ground and can't move for up to ten minutes. Like suddenly, I'll double over in pain and start staggering instead of walking and it's humiliating because people have pointed and laughed, saying I'm drunk/high instead of thinking I'm having medical issues. I've collapsed several times in the local supermarket, to the point that they offered to have a staff member follow me in case I have one of these falls again, which is very nice of them tbh.
It makes me scared to go out to just get groceries because it feels like Russian Roulette whether I'll have one of these episodes or not. I've got college soon and I have to walk a lot to get back and forth, so I'm nervous that I'll end up not being able to attend, just as I'm climbing out of NEETdom.
I've been to several doctors, one just gave me anti-inflammatories that didn't help, another said maybe I won't have back problems if I get a breast reduction and lose the weight I put on from some meds I got given last year. Yesterday I finally talked to a doctor who is sending me to a chiropractor and physiotherapist along with getting an MRI of my spine. I'm glad I'm getting somewhere with this, but it's really scary sometimes. What if I fall while on a stairwell or something? I've fallen over while walking across the road once but the driver got out and helped me to the other side of the pavement so I could call someone to pick me up.
There's neurological problems in one side of my family, my mother used to have a lot of seizures for example, so I wonder if it's something related to that. I don't black out when I collapse but I do become really disorientated during bad episodes, like once at the supermarket I was trying to phone my mother to drive me home and I forgot how to use my phone for a few minutes…
I really hope I can find a solution to this problem soon. Maybe it's the 15+ kgs of books I used to have to walk 4km a day back and forth from the bus stop? I've always wondered if that was going to give me back/spinal problems in the future.
Thanks for listening to my TED talk nonnies, look after yourselves for me, okay?
No. 1659357
File: 1691627803265.jpg (52.53 KB, 500x500, artworks-dxNTbRrHY12Imhd5-vr6s…)
I just coomed to the idea of a man fucking me while I hold a tablet where he watches porn and barely able to get hard because he can't forget it's actually me he's fucking
No. 1659391
File: 1691629795155.jpg (Spoiler Image,778.51 KB, 3024x4032, RDT_20230809_21120729630785193…)
>>1659377This the kind of man you're thinking about huh
No. 1659397
>>1659388I guess I'm just venting but confessing would in fact be more appropriate
>>1659391more lean
I guess I have internalized this sexual fantasy as a weird cope because of my shitty ex who was a weird coomer
No. 1659406
>>1659404yes
nonny please correct my wrong behaviour
I don't want to goon to degenerate ideas anymore
No. 1659409
>>1659407no I got off already now I'm seeking true redemption
besides I'm heterosexual sorrry
nonny No. 1659414
>>1659391Dicks on obese/fat men is just so weird looking kek
It's like the penis is being swallowed by the fat lol
No. 1659421
File: 1691632205321.jpg (25 KB, 579x550, 053714c12258fe707aa697d9919a66…)
>>1659406SNAP OUT OF IT IMMIDIENTLY!!!!!
No. 1659435
File: 1691633322269.png (248.88 KB, 797x813, mewhenhamter.png)
I've become so much worse mentally in like the last month or so. I've never been a super mentally sound person, but this past month I've gotten exponentially worse. I basically am a shitty NEET (who's trying to find unemployment but can't) and basically I have been sleeping everyday from like 3AM-11AM for the past few months. My sleep has normally been fine, and for my whole life I used to be able to sleep through the night, but recently, I wake up every two or three hours, and when I wake up, it is usually because of some vivid nightmare I am having.
I don't want to go into details, but these dreams have been ranging from super violent and upsetting to extremely bizarre. One of the worst ones I dreamt my mother died and I woke up convinced she had died. I was convinced she was dead for a few hours after I had woken. WTF… how could I be so delusional to believe she actually died for a few hours? I only realized she was still alive after my sister came home. I was so upset about it. I was on the verge of tears and manic for hours.
And just last night I had another delusional dream where I met someone I didn't really know- Point being, that the dream felt so real. I thought all day about that dream, even though I knew it wasn't really. My weird obsessions are getting worse. I'll get caught in my thoughts for hours, as if I can't move. I understand logically that my grip on reality seems to be fading, but I don't know what to do. I think it's related to me being a NEET, (and partially from receiving physical abuse as a child, likely)… but I have no money, and no job. I think I might benefit from psychological treatment, but there's no way I could afford it.
I swear I'm not saying this all for attention, or that I'm "literally soooo mentally ill teehee", but I'm seriously concerned for myself. Why am I having so many nightmares? I've never had this many (vivid) nightmares in my entire life. It's making me not want to go to bed, or to try and sleep for as little as possible. I never thought I would say this, because I usually love sleep, but the nightmares have been so awful, I'd rather be awake. It's makng me so much worse.
Has anyone else ever had this? Have you all of the sudden had a string of really bad/hyper realistic nightmares? Was there anything you could do to fix it?
No. 1659451
File: 1691634641210.jpg (28.75 KB, 564x704, 1a942b5b476655417e5a5e7e09b22c…)
Buying games to ease the crippling loneliness
No. 1659457
File: 1691635068886.png (1.31 MB, 950x631, asedgjklwaejgewa.png)
>>1659454Honestly I need a hug to, so you can hug me…
No. 1659458
File: 1691635070259.jpg (314.82 KB, 1024x768, 11570549.jpg)
>>1659454Of course anon, big hugs to you.
No. 1659460
>>1659454I love you
nonny. What’s your favourite band? What dog breed would you like to reincarnate as, if you had to? Smooch.
No. 1659462
File: 1691635242914.jpg (109.8 KB, 564x752, 4537593625325.jpg)
>>1659454It's gonna be okay nona, I'm proud of you.
No. 1659501
File: 1691638000228.jpeg (49.03 KB, 655x468, IMG_2921.jpeg)
It feels like such a losing battle to make myself look even semi presentable.
I spend so much on beauty products and my hair is shit, my skin is shit, I just look like shit. The only thing I have going for me is height and not being fat.
No. 1659568
>>1659435Yes, this happens to me occasionally, and I still have no idea what
triggers it. The longest it has gone on for was a few weeks, maybe longer. You just have to get through it.
There are solutions via psychiatric meds, so maybe once you have a job again you can look into trazodone. Until then, try not to eat up to a few hours before bed, leave a small lamp on in your room so you have a better chance of recognizing your surroundings on waking, and hold strong. You can also try getting into lucid dreaming. If I realize I'm in an awful dream, I can force myself awake immediately. Sometimes I start changing the dream without consciously realizing I'm doing that, and I remember it when I wake up later.
Good luck,
nonnie. I hope your sleep returns to normal soon.
No. 1659582
File: 1691643752589.jpg (44.82 KB, 500x635, 272722773.jpg)
im so fucking gross i hate my body i despise it so so much
every single day i wish i could be tiny and petite and fragile and cute i wouldn't make my boyfriend so miserable if i wasn't so disgusting
i eat 800 calories a day and im still so fat i hate it i hate it so much i just want to be attractive. my life is not worth living unless im dainty and small
i wish i could afford weight loss surgery i would rather die under the knife than continue living like this i just cannot take it anymore i hate being poor and ugly im destined to just die alone in a ditch
No. 1659599
File: 1691647175269.jpg (51.27 KB, 564x609, 1671916358057.jpg)
the bathroom is right next to my bedroom and i can hear that my mom does not ever wash her hands when she uses the toilet and then she ges angry at me when i don't want to eat her food. she calls me if i decide to go out and don't tell her exactly where i am. the house has decades of of grime and i feel overwhelmed at the idea of cleaning it esp when it wouldnt be maintained. i feel like a perpetual teenager since moving back in after a breakup, i need to get fulltime work and move out so badly.
No. 1659600
File: 1691647385991.jpg (151.13 KB, 828x1104, ssbbw_chunky_and_fat_____by_tr…)
https://www.deviantart.com/tracyporker/art/I-m-Fat-Cute-and-Curvy-864283958This faggot is the most degen thing ive seen all day
No way this is a woman, women dont do this to theirselves… Look at its fucking face.. LOOK AT IT..
(newfaggotry) No. 1659614
File: 1691649589418.jpg (36.93 KB, 702x474, IMG_3433.jpg)
kinda fucked rn but its also my fault. its like im holding myself back from functioning and moving on properly in my life to sort out some emotional thing and i dont get it and dont have shrooms or whatever. i cut a chunk off my finger recently trying to break a tardproof razor to cut myself. literally just clowning around shirking responsibilities rn
No. 1659630
File: 1691652364558.jpg (201.52 KB, 1024x794, reflection_odilon_redon-1024x7…)
I am terribly afraid of early onset cognitive decline. I was diagnosed with AD(H)D but sometimes I wonder if it might be something worse like dementia or Alzheimer's or something. I have difficulty following conversations, I get told things only to promptly forget them, I ask the same questions a hundred times at work, I find it difficult to follow movie plots or have conversations with people (I forget what I wanted to say or lose my train of thoughts mid sentence). I assume being depressed and socially isolated does not help either. I feel like an 80 year-old mentally and I'm in my late 20s
No. 1659639
>>1659636Samefag as I can't edit post but even my mother commenting on what she heard about that case and mentioning the fact that the girl lied to her parents she's going out to dump the trash away said about the girl "probably she was trash".
Not even mentioning this bitch who dares to call 11 year old a trash is obviously the same person who abused me psychologically for years.
I will be really happy when she will be dead.
No. 1659652
File: 1691656132880.jpeg (11.26 KB, 170x158, IMG_0057.jpeg)
>>1659594I’ll pour one out for you too Nona. I hope your cystic acne clears up and you feel better about yourself.
No. 1659658
>>1657737I feel this so hard down to the architecture. Why the fuck is every building a gray cube and prison-esque? Everything is bleak and for money now. Weird new slang every week, internet speak irl, obsession with porn and sex that somehow multiplied the last 6 years, white and gray furniture everywhere, no sense of community, talking to strangers is considered weird now, people glued to the phones which are out in hand all the time, no authenticity, no new subcultures can even form because strangers can't get together and bond like previous decades…just burn it all. The world is so fucking apocalyptic and weird now. No wonder everyone is depressed and it's just gonna go downhill from here. Humans are not meant to be living like this. Future generations are fucked.
I am so sick of everything being about sex, porn, murders, negativity, and vapid bullshit. It's soul sucking and demonic. I do feel like things used to be a little more innocent, well not as explicit as stuff nowadays. Society used to shame people and there isn't any of that anymore so now everyone is just showing their degeneracy. Shit makes me want to buy a squishmallow and a puppy and cuddle up with them to shower myself in innocence.
No. 1659673
File: 1691658527346.jpg (33.73 KB, 720x540, vlcsnap-00570.jpg)
>>1657737I've been thinking about this lately myself. I noticed that fashion is getting more bland and outside of depop kids cosplaying the previous decades or some subculture gone by, "that girl" fashion is just… top, pants, bag. But it has to be a specific top, pants and bag. Fashion also moves so much faster yet it's so much more expensive to have "that girl" items (clothes, makeup, haircare and skincare products) compared to just a decade ago. Back then it was Babylips and EOS, now it's Charlotte Tilbury and Drunk Elephant. Young girls in my area also used to dress a lot more fun and colorful, now it's just beige, white and black with the occasional pink top.
I won't even mention home decor, it's so sterile now. I'm mid 20s and buy everything second hand now. Furniture, clothes, everything. If I ever want my home to look like a prison hospital I'll just rob someone.
No. 1659685
File: 1691659445137.jpeg (80.98 KB, 1200x1079, IMG_1131.jpeg)
Samefagging to add picrel
No. 1659690
File: 1691659665632.jpeg (27.13 KB, 622x350, IMG_1884.jpeg)
Do you ever want to fuck someone so bad it hurts? Someone who doesn’t know who you are?
No. 1659781
File: 1691669739161.jpg (94.02 KB, 800x600, drunkkitty.jpg)
im supposed to do online coursework but im too anxious… i hate that im a retard and my life will never get better
No. 1659808
>>1659771This is gonna sound mean and i should just keep it to myself but since we're anon… you should never have hired an obese person for housekeeping, that's on you! Everyone who has done the job knows it's fine to be fat, overweight even, but not obese. They never make it and they always slack or have to quit because the work is too physical.
She's gonna be complaining about her arms and back and have bruises on her shins from manhandling the roll-vac…
If you are frustrated by having to write people up and all the tedious shit that goes with that, have a meeting with them where you just say straight up that they aren't doing the job and they're at serious risk of being terminated and if it's not for them that okay but it's not fair to the team to stay and do a bad job, offer them the
option of resigning right there and getting a letter of recommendation from you or a good reference or something. really cuts out a lot of the bullshit. obviously tell your higherups about it first because the employee will understandably often want to speak to your boss if the idea of being written up upsets them. actually you would ideally have this meeting with the first warning letter so there's something to sign and it's pre-approved by your boss so they're aware of the performance issues. whatever you do, do not leave your boss in the dark because the employee will go to them and you will get accused of bullying for literally doing your supervisory job.
No. 1659950
>>1659808NTA but I'm technically obese (don't look it, most people would just think overweight) and never had a problem performing physical labor and I've always held myself accountable. Sounds like a character flaw if you use your weight as an excuse to not do a job, though I'm sure being obese correlates to making excuses in general and anon still should not have hired her.
Same with older folks, unfortunately.
Not sure if anon is in the same boat, but I've known employers who keep dogshit employees on because they struggle to fill housekeeping positions with reliable folks. Maybe anon just can't position to threaten termination without losing everyone on the team.
No. 1660142
>>1660095Miserable fucking day, nonita! I'm sorry about it. Imagine that old pervert slipping on some spilled coke and throwing his back out.
I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.
No. 1660208
It sucks to work full time at an office 8am-5pm but still have to live with your annoying narcissist mom. It was so nice when she was gone last month, and now she's back and now I'm yet again dreading going home. She does the dumbest shit and always needs help, yet acts morally superior even though she doesn't even make 20k a year more than me. All the immigrants are stealing the affordable housing, so now I have to hustle even harder to get a job that pays EVEN MORE in hopes of being able to afford a fucking 1.6k month studio apartment. I hate New York. I wish she's retired and move into the condo my GMA left, but she's only started thinking about saving for retirement THIS year, so unless me and my friends can finally find a place to rent together soon, I'm stuck until she "thinks she has enough money". Pisses me off because all she's ever talked about for years was retiring and moving out of state, but ofc, since all boomers are fucking retarded children, it's all fucking talk. Ugh. Fuck this gay earth and the American housing crisis, I wish the Presidents and mayors and people in charge would give a fuck about tax paying citizens who did the right things by going to college and getting jobs and paying taxes over stupid optics and the American savior complex, but they don't.
No. 1660369
>>1660239Less for the "taking too long to get me my food" and more for the "putting his hands all over my salad". A lot of men will mess with women's food just because they get off to the idea of her ingesting it. Obviously putting your hands in someone's food is the lower end of the scale from bodily fluid contamination, but after reading a lot of nastiness online, it's usually in a similar vein. Plus, men NEVER wash their hands because they're fucking pigs.
I wonder if he was a diversity hire though, since they didn't hire you. You probably already know this, but the gov sometimes subsidizes tard wages so the company only has to pay them very little, way below minimum wage. That's why they hire downies at goodwill; goodwill only has to pay them about 50c/hr.
No. 1660393
File: 1691702411066.jpg (246.95 KB, 720x1313, 20230810223604387.jpg)
I'm so done with online dating. The moids on there are so ugly.
No. 1660491
File: 1691708230316.jpg (14.09 KB, 275x273, 1675247415289.jpg)
CP bump don't scroll
No. 1660519
File: 1691710450495.gif (771.44 KB, 220x220, spiderman-crying.gif)
WHY THE FUCK IS SOLDERING SO FUCKING DIFFICULT WHY WON'T THE SOLDER STAY ON JUST PUT THE TWO PIECES OF METAL TOGETHER I NEED LIKE SIX HANDS FUCK I'M A RETARD
No. 1660544
God I can't fucking stand flakey people like if you're flakey don't even fucking bother committing to anything ever. I hate having to work on a team, nobody ever fucking does their part of the work and I have to pick up the slack for everyone, all the time. Sometimes people try to bitch at me like, "Oh come on anon you miss deadlines too" yeah you cunt because I was doing YOUR work, which had to be done before I could even START mine. Like how hard is it to understand that this is the sort of project where people depend on you to do your job or else they can't do theirs. If you miss your deadline, the next person will miss theirs, and so on. That's not fucking hard to understand. It's literally the entire point of our timelines and role delineation. Why do you think we even have bother?
I will run a timeline by the team 3 times, force them to repeat it to me like they are actual kindergarteners, and then announce it once a week for months and then when the deadlines roll around everyone hasn't even started their shit and is begging me to extend the deadlines. And I inevitably have to extend them over and over and over and over, like we are missing deadlines by fucking months. I shouldn't have to mommy you to make sure you have basic time management skills, you're fucking adults. I have my own work to do! There's just no excuse but they always have a trillion reasons as to why I have to do their work for them, wahhh muh ADHD wahhh muh autism muh work issues muh moving okay yeah I have dealt with all that shit too, I'm not saying it's easy, but all I ask is you just take some fucking responsibility and say, "Sorry anon, I fucked up, I will do better." Is that so hard? No matter what is going on in my life, I try very hard to make sure I don't drop the ball and if I do, I apologize profusely and sincerely reflect on how to make sure it doesn't happen again. I have been drugged out of my mind on antipsychotics, I've been in psych wards, I've been at funerals, I've been in hostels, and I have still fucking managed to communicate my availability and make sure I do my part, so no I really do not think there is any excuse.
Meanwhile, the first time I gently pointed out to a staff member that maybe her fucking off for a month around pre-established deadlines to vacation in Europe was a massive oversight, especially since she'd apparently entirely forgotten about major tasks that she'd committed to and were literally required to finish the project, she got defensive and quit on the spot. Fucking good riddance, I hate you people. I've tried everything too. I've tried being nice, I've tried being a hardass, I've tried being hands-on, I've tried being hands-off, I've tried polls, surveys, voice calls, heart-to-hearts, nothing fucking works. It's like pulling teeth to make anyone do anything, ever, and they always treat me like I'm so unreasonable for asking them where the work they promised is and it's like why the fuck did you even join? And then they have the audacity to ask me be a reference. Tf do you want me to say, "Yeah she never met a single deadline, in fact she fucked me over so badly I gave myself wrist issues trying to do her work and mine." Fuck off.
And I can't even say it's just the current staff, this has been a pattern since we started this thing like 5 years ago and the staff has changed a few times since then. There have been 2 exceptions and I miss them both so much. Everyone else has just been jaw-droppingly unreliable, no one ever wants to take responsibility for their shit, there's always a reason they can't do the things they commit to, if someone says their work will be done on Monday, they actually mean Friday, and the work will be half-assed and riddled with typos, and they don't take it seriously or see any problem with it. And there's also such a lack of curiosity, it's always like the very first challenge they face they just stop and never return to the project because "I didn't know how to do xyz", bitch have you heard of Google or idk asking a question? Like come the fuck on. I constantly run into shit I don't know how to do and I just fucking–here's an idea–learn how to do it. Isn't that the point? Are you an actual fucking toddler?
I'm sitting here having to push back the timeline AGAIN because of course this person flaked and is telling me she'll be ready in a week (which means two weeks) and realizing that this is actual months later than our original deadline that everyone agreed on and I just want to give up, fuck this. Like this actively ruins our second half of the year timeline, why don't they see that? We're fucked. Granted, we are all zoomers, I've only ever worked with zoomers on this project, so I wonder if it's because of their age? I don't remember this being a problem when I worked with older coworkers in other team-oriented projects. I don't know, I don't get it, I keep wondering if I'm the problem but I literally cannot think of anything else I could possibly do. I've tried so hard, I am just out of ideas. Maybe I'm just not meant to be a leader.
No. 1660563
File: 1691713535445.jpeg (19.55 KB, 474x474, th-3067553954.jpeg)
>>1660519Do you have "helping hands" like picrel? It helps a lot hold to hold things in place for soldering. Also, you might want to get one of those perforated prototype breadboards to practice soldering joints until you feel more confident with it. They're pretty cheap and it only takes burning through 1 or 2 to feel like you won't destroy actual expensive hardware with globs of solder.
No. 1660580
File: 1691714372923.jpg (53.3 KB, 1000x1000, 510iLXSYGFL.jpg)
My ocd is being so fucking retarded right now. I went to the grocery store, they didn't have any coconut milk yogurt so I had to pick something else. Ended up picking up this yogurt, opened the lid to make sure it was sealed and saw some brown-ish liquid spot on the seal. My finger accidentally wiped across it and I tried not to think to much of it. like 10 minutes later after looking at the yogurts I finally decide to just get the Noosa yogurt and ended up picking up the same container. I got home, realized, and now my mind is making me think the dark spot is old blood from someone who has HIV/AIDS. Now I have to sanitize everything I touched and I'm gonna pour hydrogen peroxide over the spot to see if it's blood.
At least the yogurt is yummy. My life sucks man.
No. 1660639
File: 1691718668898.jpg (90.14 KB, 736x1041, 56db1651853f38d441be95aaacb2d5…)
>>1660580Samefag, I poured hydrogen peroxide over the little bit left over the spot, and I don't think it bubbled up. Still sprayed everything down with alcohol, but I'm happy.
No. 1660651
File: 1691719890590.jpeg (24.82 KB, 275x237, IMG_9823.jpeg)
I literally dropped out of school because of a mandatory group project. I got too nervous to join a group, and felt like an outcast/didn't belong so I dropped out
No. 1660684
>>1660526Thanks anon.
>>1660563I caved and bought one, it's shipping to me. My father insane man that he is manages to perfectly freehand it somehow, he's had years of practice but still. I keep burning my poor LEDs trying to get the wires connected to them.
I have a breadboard that I got for free that I'm not using, maybe I'll practice on it.
No. 1660692
File: 1691722814920.gif (194.77 KB, 220x220, cat-screaming-cat.gif)
I NEED IT TO BE OCOTBER I CANT HANDLE THIS 43-44C HEAT ANYMORE. I WANT MY PUMPKINS, FALL CLOTHES, LIGHTS, AND RAIN!!
No. 1660782
File: 1691733628386.jpg (354.07 KB, 720x1291, 20230811075627191.jpg)
Translation:
I'm keen on a travelling buddy
Or someone to grab a drink with
Jfc a literal cripple with some genetic disorder(s) on Tinder. I'm so done. Like go to an app for the handicapped or something. I'm tired of swiping left my hand hurts. It shouldn't be this hard. There's so many moids and 99.9% of them are bottom of the absolute barrel, like I'm offended that I'm exposed to the ugliest creatures on the planet.
No. 1660807
File: 1691738248047.png (805.95 KB, 622x814, pls.png)
my husband said that he feels like i'm "trying to get pregnant" by me wanting him to come inside of me. I GOT A FUCKING IUD THAT HURT A FUCK TON AND IS FUCKING WITH MY HORMONES AND STILL IS FUCKING WITH MY CYCLE OVER TWO YEARS LATER. I GOT IT BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO GET PREGNANT YOU ABSOLUTELY IDIOTIC DUMB MAN. I HATE MEN. i want to orgasm at the same time as you. there is literally no chance i can get pregnant. it will take six months after removal before i will probably be able to conceive again. he was flabbergasted why i was pissed off and took a walk for the rest of the night. i know there is like a .01 chance but that's not the issue. why would he be worried about me 'trying' to get pregnant when i have said the whole reason i got an IUD was because i am scared of pregnancy, and want to make sure we have it planned out beforehand?
thanks for reading i'm angry and he is sleeping on the couch
No. 1660844
>>1660812I never trust men when they call anyone crazy, least of all a woman, even less if it's a woman they have some form of history with.
Actually scratch that, I will never trust men on anything. I've yet to be proven wrong.
No. 1660894
We haven't talked for 2 weeks, but last night he messaged me. Basically, it was him saying we should go true no contact, which I expected. He'd been hiding on all socials during this time, but I noticed he was online, so I had a feeling he was gonna message me and I was right. On one hand, I'm fucking relieved to hear he is in both solo and marriage therapy because this is necessary and should've been a thing before he got involved with me. On the other hand, I'm appalled that he still has the gall to say that 'he doesn't regret anything except hurting me'. Bro, you betrayed your wife and were already making plans to leave her until she blindsided you by accepting (in his words: not freaking out about) you being completely dishonest about who you were for 10 years (their whole relationship), amongst other stuff that has definitely traumatised her. He hasn't told her that he cheated, and he never will tell her because he told me that is the one thing she won't tolerate and he knows that. How can you not regret hurting her in this way, even if she has no idea?
So, he's cutting ties with me because reminders of me 'hurt to look at' and he 'needs to move on'. My friends and I have basically sussed out that he is a sociopath or has sociopathic traits (idk why I was blind to this for so long). I do feel terrible for his wife because if the topic of cheating is brought up in their therapy, I just know he will lie to both her and the therapist's faces about what he did. My best friend also said she thinks he will try to reach out again at some point in the future, probably if the therapy doesn't work, or if it does work and he feels like 'he's in a better place to talk to me' because she thinks he still has feelings for me (whatever that means to a sociopath). Even though I said distancing was for the best, he was still saying shit like 'I would (be with you) if I could, but I have to try to save my marriage'. For context, this was said to me while his wife was in the other room still shaking from his admissions. Like his immediate reaction was to hop on his phone to message me and give me a play-by-play of what had been discussed and the outcomes, etc.
Ngl, it's scary to know that people like this exist. I hold myself accountable for getting involved with him because it was wrong. I fell for the whole 'relationship was on its way out' spiel, which doesn't excuse it, but it helped ease my guilt. I guess he's able to feel no remorse because of the sociopathic shit, but I can't fathom it. He and his wife are sexually incompatible; he likes things she doesn't (he is HL and has a lot of kinks - some are hardcore, and I think she's the complete opposite) which frustrates him, and idk if therapy can fix that. I just hope that therapy will lead to them separating because she deserves better, and I think he needs to work on himself with extensive therapy for his trauma and presumed ASPD, but I doubt it.
Sorry for the wall of text.
No. 1660979
File: 1691761923225.png (424.76 KB, 640x640, IMG_9107.png)
Ordered delivery from a restaurant I frequent but there must have not been enough delivery drivers because they sent it to me through doordash and of course despite leaving a 20% tip and detailed instructions I get a call from some scrote whose like “come down the the parking lot to get it.” I told him that it needs to come to the door and that the gate is open only to hear him sigh loudly and go “whatever just come down here”. Hunger got the best of me so I went down and he just shoves the bag into my chest without saying anything then drives off. This is why I never use doordash. They hire the most retarded people who can’t fucking read and honestly I’m the bigger idiot for not canceling the order and telling him to fuck off. Also because I didn’t originally order through doordash I never got his name and can’t report him…
No. 1660994
File: 1691763974741.jpg (19.96 KB, 564x544, 0931d98e45a510a6848500cbbc0995…)
I have a crush on someone in a poly relationship and because I don't like polyamory conceptually I get schadenfreude when she mentions her "partner's partner". She loves her partner and doesn't date anyone else herself so I just know it has to hurt.
It would make me sad if I wasn't bitter.
No. 1661021
File: 1691766240978.png (444.37 KB, 635x465, bitemyshinymetalass.PNG)
wtf is with moids and wheelchairs? last couple of times I've had to walk anywhere randos ask if I want them to push me and it's always moids who can't take no for an answer. had one dude grab my bars to 'help' me through a door and the hoebag got all huffy when I put my brakes on and told him to let go of me. stg the next male who touches me is going to require a chair himself.
No. 1661069
File: 1691769189679.jpg (29.45 KB, 564x821, 2445fb40fbb0b5fce33b3d0de81050…)
bump for cp, don't scroll
No. 1661072
File: 1691769373489.png (72.84 KB, 500x314, 1531865475354.png)
I hate it when I hear my father coming home. Not as in, it'd be better if he never came back or something, but literally as in coming home from anywhere. I never know what mood he'll be in, and until I've spied it out through the door, I can't calm down and feel my heart racing myself shaking. It's also just when it's him coming home, when it's me it's totally fine; I'm glad that at least it's me coming back later usually. Otherwise he's even an okay-ish father, so idk why this gets me so bad.
No. 1661077
File: 1691769696889.jpg (46.41 KB, 736x915, EgRqBxHWkAAC4bb.jpg)
>>1661072I remember growing up like that. One day you will have your own home that you can fully relax in and this part of your life will be a distant dream.
No. 1661191
File: 1691778917554.png (716.19 KB, 914x706, imdoneuwu.png)
pic is funny and related im not a kpopfag
im so embarrassed of my anachan tendencies. im a normal weight trying to cope with it but i hate how it looks and my final year of undergrad is coming up and i just know the stress is gonna make me revert again. i didnt even realize it affected my relationship until my bf told me and damn it really does. my stretch marks are really bothering me still and i got them back in 2014 and some still havent faded? last time i had sex (last year kek) i just felt fat the entire time and wasn't "present". i want to have sex again soon but im gonna weigh myself and be anachan again. idk why im like this noones ever called me fat and i understand why people with eating disorders piss people off. im retarded idk.
sorry bf sorry family sorry organs
No. 1661216
File: 1691780784697.jpg (35.81 KB, 423x474, 1458224231841.jpg)
On twitter I keep seeing young Black women from all over the world talking openly about being divestors and about the issues they face within their own communities and I wish these issues are very relatable. I wish I could find women from my race to talk about these things and feel less alone, even just online, but they're usually hiding for pretty good reasons. I started reading a book at some point from a young journalist talking about issues such as dating within your race and outside, religion, family, sexism within the community, racism, etc. but she was also saying really dumb shit between her many good and interesting points and it was so frustrating. Before that she and another girl wrote an online article for a well-known newspaper in my country when they were students, the article was published anonymously for months and was behind a paywall and everyone seethed hard and assumed the writers were White supremacists fetishizing Brown Muslim women when it turned out that it was written by young women saying many of us are fed up with being forced to not drink alcohol, to wear the hijab and to not have sex out of wedlock with their White boyfriends kek.
Anyway it wasn't coherent at all but tldr; I wish I could talk about the issues that affect me personally with like-minded women but we're too few and hiding from each other because everyone assumes we're crazy racists for not liking sexism done against us by men from our race.
No. 1661236
My recent worries over my bf's plans to visit has me feeling like the pettiest and least generous soul on Earth. I've had a long-distance relationship with occasional, shorter visits on for like two years now. Lately he mentioned that with the rising plane prices he wants to stay longer (travel expenses are fully on him). Now between last time and now my life circumstances have somewhat changed. I have my first stable job and am doing university at the same time, and he picked the worst time of year to visit with work being the busiest while I also have to do classes and projects for school. He originally also planned to stay 3 whole months, but I told him that was impossible.
I also live on my own now while before we've been staying at cheap apartments for like 2 weeks at most at a visit or stayed a week at my family's.
Honestly the first time he expressed that he'd plan on staying with me for 3 months I instantly hated the idea. It'd be one thing if he had something to do while staying here, but his plans are basically just going through the backlog of his games and working on some of his creative hobbies. Am I a monster? I can't imagine coming to someone after a 10-12 hour day only to listen how they just gamed all day, and wanting to have sex with them. He did offer to clean and cook, but I live in a fucking two-room apartment, there isn't much domestic work involved, I don't even keep pets and he doesn't speak the local language, so he's of no use to run errands. For him to even suggest basically a three-month vacation for himself is making me lose all attraction to him, even though I know some people would gladly give their partners some time off to recover if they could. I also expressed something like that back when we've first met, but I feel like that was really naive or I might not just love him enough for this.
No. 1661255
File: 1691783355959.jpg (56.87 KB, 620x827, Funny Cats - 30 Pics.jpg)
It's like I get rid of one pussy problem and then another springs right up
No. 1661302
>>1661236If all travel expenses are on him you should recognize that and be grateful for his investment in the relationship, but I understand your point
Would he pay for the groceries and electricity too while he's with you? I think then it would be fair for him to laze around for 3 months
No. 1661382
File: 1691792050367.jpeg (75.13 KB, 828x801, F2opmqOWYAAkalK.jpeg)
I wished I could mentally block my face from reflections and photos. I fucking hate myself.
No. 1661394
File: 1691793264852.jpg (250.43 KB, 1080x800, kitty puff.jpg)
>>1661382Awwwww have a hug, cat
nonnie No. 1661395
File: 1691793299087.jpg (725.39 KB, 3024x4032, cat cow.jpg)
I get that people want acknowledgement but what about? I'm willing to compromise but I'm not a mind reader.
No. 1661400
File: 1691793681988.jpg (30.98 KB, 564x564, dc98816a19f1ce17813fdd2d7d22ca…)
>>1661394aww thanks nonna!
No. 1661446
File: 1691797658103.jpg (25.38 KB, 600x375, FfIgEJQX0AMan8F.jpg)
Lately I'm meeting many people who think they're the main character. It's starting to wear me down.
What I hate most is that it seems to work, people believe them and give some of them opportunities that those more qualified can't get. I really don't mind confidence when it is warranted, I think it's great. But these schmucks talk like snake oil salesmen and paint themselves as the bestest greatest smartest boys in the world that everyone loves and wants to fuck.
In one week I've met
>middle aged tech bro from California who "thinks logically because he's an engineer so it's super easy for him to learn languages quickly", claimed he was fluent in mine, did not speak it well. Passionate about climate tech, flew to Africa for a charity, did not know anything about climate tech despite acting like he did.
>28 year old college classmate who is super successful and talented and a fast learner and everyone says she's so pretty and smart and every guy in every room is totally flirting with her and her boss is hitting on her and she has so many friends and her life is so perfect and
>woman who is "so inspirational" and a woman of many talents, climbed Mt Kilimanjaro and went on a "prestigious polar expedition" that "few people get selected for". Expedition was a paid (like all her other achievements) hike of several days organized by a company and there was nothing polar about it. It was in Sweden.
>another self-proclaimed "adventurer" who loves traveling "off the beaten path" (Eastern Europe, by plane) and is yet another smartest boy software engineer. Did not let anyone else talk, aggressively mansplained everything.
I guess I shouldn't fault people for knowing how to sell themselves but they're so overconfident that it circles back around and sounds like they're insecure and compensating for something.
No. 1661483
>>1661475Yep men use manipulation, lies, and sexually coerce women so frequently that it's brushed off as normal and women are told they should have been smarter and that they're not a
victim. Men even have weird slang for their rancid
abusive behavior which normalizes their abuse even more.
No. 1661552
I feel like all the deaths, illness and trauma should have made me way more fucked up, why do I see people with way less traumatic events around me in absolute bits, on so much medication, they try so hard yet they seem just fucked. I don't know if I'm just used to everything being so terrible and absurd that my almost 30yo life just seems so good, yeah I'm still dealing with the trauma but most of the time I get into deep stuff with people, I listen and care, sure. Then I tell a morsel of my life, and they get that look of shock and they get kind of uncomfortable because it is a lot and I always hear how I seem "so zen, so calm and collected" basically like I have my shit together, I'm not sure if I do but I do wonder if I'm just dead on the inside. I've gone to these support groups for some of the things I've been going through, therapy and they always surprise me and make me feel like on paper, it would expected and oh so valid to be so fucked up in the head yet I'm here, yeah I have my moments where I wanna die but I just kinda ignore it? My therapist told me about how some people just can bounce back better than others and how someone crumbles after situation a as someone can go through a-f before crumbling, of course I know that but I think she must think I just refuse to think about the awful things but the thing is that I have hyper analysed them ever since I was a small child? I am fully aware, I just feel like this is an odd wall when it comes to bonding with other people, they always end up opening up to me and I do appreciate it very much, its nice to be a safe person to others but not once has anyone not done that mix of shock, shame and awkward "you must think I'm whining about nothing, anon, sorry I didn't know you seem so carefree". Bitch, I wouldn't think that but some of these people have turned their one trauma into their whole personality and they visibly get shaken up once they realise that people around them might be going through shit as well but they don't make it into their whole thing? This has been a fucking word vomit, I'm very sleepy but a lot of thoughts I don't feel like sharing with the people in my life.
No. 1661580
>>1661552Different people have different sensitivities to things, I think. Some of what you do may be repression, from a couple sentences you said. But you have a therapist and you clearly talk about these issues, so probably not. Another thing that influences whether or not someone is traumatized by an event, is how much support they get after it occurs, and how. If you have supportive or understanding family or friends, that could have affected the way you process things better than others. How someone was raised will affect their resilience, of course. You may also be autismo kek.
The hyperanalyzing when you were younger probably helped, too. When I just sat down and thought through a lot of shit, processing the anger and "unfairness" ended up helping me a lot. Many people just continue retraumatizing themselves by thinking about what happened, but never practicing "radical acceptance" or whatever it's called. Constantly subjecting yourself to huge emotional meltdowns with no resolution can wear someone down.
Anyways, just thought I'd share my thoughts on why it could be. Something to think about bc there is no way I could know, but are you maybe oversharing when someone seems shocked? If not, they're probably just weird about thinking women who have been through something difficult are typically fragile baby birds kek
No. 1661937
File: 1691826141014.jpeg (276.23 KB, 1292x2048, 2E492D45-E409-46CF-B4B9-2BC2C1…)
There needs to be a support group for lesbian incels or something. I swear to fucking god the ugliest moid alive still has an easier time getting laid than I do. Even on the rare occasion I run into a lesbian IRL they always seem to reveal themselves to be LARPers eventually, they’re all uwu cottagecore sapphic types who are intimidated of any sort of actual gender non conformity in women. Maybe it’s a good thing that women don’t operate on the same level of depraved horniness that moids do 24/7 but sometimes I fucking wish I liked moids because all the gay men I know had 226151717 coomers sliding into their DMs within 30 seconds of downloading Grindr
No. 1661944
File: 1691826228082.jpg (10.1 KB, 300x309, 540a0de79d9e63fef2df0949acf7c9…)
>>1661749Samefag, my foot got way worse in 2 hours than it was all day. My toe is throbbing and literally feels like it's going to burst when i walk. I'm going to fucking bed, can't do this shit. If it forms an abscess and I have to go to the ER I'm gonna be pissed.
No. 1661962
>>1661947IMMEDIATELY tell my sister what he did, and emphasize that he came back to basically ask if you would let him fuck you after you already told him that was inappropriate and never happening. He's a creep and your sister deserves better.
I hope you have a good relationship with her, because she might get upset. But your conscience will be clean and it will be on record he is a sex pest. In fact, tell your more discreet friends what happened so somebody knows. And don't spend any time around him. Sorry this happened to you,
nonnie.
No. 1661971
>>1661967Well. I think it would maybe just hurt you a little more?
When I got an ingrown (twice), I mostly took ibuprofen, squeezed the pus out, put antibiotic ointment on it, and GENTLY iced. You might also see if you can gently trim away the edge of your ingrown that is cutting into your toe.
If you go to the ER/urgent care, they will offer to stick a numbing needle into your toe, and then cut the side of your toenail off all the way to the quick. I said "no thanks, I'll take my chances" and left. My sister wanted to get a pedicure a couple weeks after that and the nail lady was so nice and careful and fixed my toe for me. It healed up over the next two days. So you can always try that as a last resort.
Good luck, nonna. Sorry this is happening to you.
No. 1661980
>>1661962We are close. She does deserve better. I don't want her to be hurt, she doesn't deserve that. He lives with us so I don't know how I can find a good moment but I will try. I don't think he will be home tomorrow so I will try before work. I want to puke.
It WAS weird, right? I know in my heart it was weird and a friend I confided in also confirmed it but i so badly don't want this to be the case. My sister loves him. My brain can't and doesn't want to process what just happened. I hate this, I hate men, I hate it all so much
No. 1661986
>>1661970Thanks anon, I'm actually comfy in bed right now so tomorrow I'll just see if I have any Epsom salt and soak my foot. Sorry that happened to your toe anon, that sucks
>>1661971>>1661975I don't think I have an ingrown though, at least not one that I can see. I also don't see any pus at all but if I do I'll go to the ER cause i don't fuck with anything that could be an abscess. Thank you nonnas
No. 1661998
>>1661982Older than me by 3 years, I think? I don't even remember. My head is so foggy this was so fucking WEIRD
I hate this. He seemed like he was about to cry when he was telling me, like he's been really distressed over this. The behavior and disposition didn't match at all with what he was actually disclosing which made it so much weirder. And before he got into it he said that he was starting to trust me and would like to trust me more. When he was done he said that he didn't want anything to change and that he meant all the nice things he'd said about me in the past and that he was really sorry for dropping this all on me and overwhelming me. I hate it. Men always think they can compliment me while acting a bit sad and I'll roll over and ignore their insanity. I won't let my sister be manipulated like that.
No. 1662012
>>1661998Christ, what a psychopath. He was trying to get a pity fuck out of you. This is shit you take to your grave, you do NOT tell your girlfriend's little sister you want to put your mouth between her legs EVER. He knows that.
You need to tell her ASAP. Text her an excuse like needing to go bra shopping and you need her help. The key is to make it something that would be inappropriate for him to tag along to. Tell her in the car.
Exactly what
>>1662002 said. If he felt so bad and was distressed, why would he ever ask if you would sleep with him anyways. I don't know everything about this situation, but I think you should not be around him. If your sister doesn't break up, you should seek out new living arrangements. You don't know if he's being a run of the mill perv or if he has been having fantasies about you for a while. Either way, disgusting.
No. 1662092
File: 1691834120489.png (143.5 KB, 658x613, minus6.png)
>mfw he blocked me on everything and told me to "have a nice life" because I was mad at him
I doubled down and just called him gay for that but it hurt not gonna lie. Nuts how he was telling me he loved me just 24 hours before
No. 1662187
>>1661713Resilience is exactly what my therapist told me to look up more, this is wild. It has made a lot sense after I've read a bit more on it.
>>1661580I never really had any support, I had two friends as a kid and I was covering up the homelife so I wasn't able to tell anyone really because that's what I always thought as well, that of course the people with the best support system would deal with situations better than those with none or poor ones? My therapy is liked to my cancer diagnosis but it's more like regular ass therapy, but I really don't go into my past like I would if it was any other time because I feel like I have some other more current issues but they do often wrap into together, big shock haha. For the oversharing, believe me I have thought about it, same with the tism but the thing is that they react that way after they're sharing their absolute worst and maybe I don't react accordingly, maybe they like how I wouldn't cry and look at them like they're bumming me out because no one ever cut contact or started acting weird, but they get clearly embarrassed after I share one tidbit. I wouldn't say that was oversharing because I've always had to be so careful of letting people know too much but I do know that I have issues with not really knowing how I could "reveal" anything when people get like that even from the little I tell, especially now when I'm like "oh yeah I'm sick right now but it is what it is, I'm just trying my best you know". I need to work on this stuff because I do think talking with people, it's nice to have people be open because I understand them more and I just need to get over myself and just read the situations better, learn what to say when people do get shocked without belittling my own experiences or theirs for that matter!
No. 1662237
>>1661990>>1661995You're right anon. I didn't do a soak but I I ended up wrapping my toe in wet toilet tissue covered with salt and tape overnight. My toe feels much better today, although idk if it's because of the salt or because I was off of it for 6 hours. The only new thing is that there's now a little yellow spot near my cuticles, which probably is pus but I'm not sure. I know I said I would go to the ER if I saw pus, but it feels so much better that I don't even want to. I've seen people say it's okay to lance paronychia to relieve the pressure but I'm not even going to try that. I'll do another soak later.
Thank you again anon!
>had a gimp for like a week>gimpLike those people who wear latex suits?
No. 1662347
>>1662259Yeah, it's fucked, and you're not being rude at all. I know I've got zero place to judge him because I was complicit in everything. I didn't wait for him to cut contact - we stopped talking because I said that continuing to confide in me (by that point, I was his confidante/pseudo-therapist, and had been talking him out of physically cheating on her with strangers/encouraging him to re-pursue therapy for his problems) when he was working on trying to fix things with his wife wouldn't be wise. In spite of everything, we wanted to try and remain friends because prior to the affair, we had a good relationship. That was a difficult, if not impossible thing to wish for because of our history, and I even said that to him. The 2-weeks of no talking happened because I'd already meddled enough and I didn't want him to turn to me for further support/comfort because that's what he'd been doing for the past few months, and I know that if that door was opened again, he would've walked through it. He told me that it was my support/advice that got him to finally speak to her about these things, and that is partly why I don't think he regrets what he did with me. He rationalised it as something necessary that'll lead to him having a healthier relationship bc he was able to learn more about himself/have experiences that were absent from his marriage.
I have no way to tell her; this was a long-term online/LD emotional/physical affair. I'm hoping that because she finally knows who he is (which was his main reason for cheating), and because the therapy is ongoing, what happened with me will remain a singular mistake. Or he'll come clean during therapy and allow her to make an informed decision about what to do because she won't be playing with a partial deck of cards. Or if he does end things, it'll be done without hurting her with the truth because it won't actually help her, and would only assuage his guilt (which I don't think he feels - maybe he will with therapy, idk).
No. 1662424
>>1662410>>1662412thank you so much nonnies. it was an older post but i saw it and i saw his face and he looked exactly the same and i feel sick to my stomach
i’ve reported him to the police but nothing has happened yet, praying he pays for what he did but i’m not hopeful
No. 1662456
>>1660894Isn't it funny how men don't grow a moral conscience until they have gotten exactly what they wanted from you?
Isn't it a coincidence that he wants to cut ties with you after you gave him his validation and know a little too much about his wife?
If him not being in your life ends up all the same–then tell the wife. It isn't fair for her.
But don't let the internalized misogyny moralfags of lolcow convince you that you are responsible for the failure of this scrote's marriage. Hate to say it, but 1. Don't assume you are the only woman he's fucking around with and 2. If not you, he would have lied and lied until he bagged somebody else.
His wife isn't special to him anon.
No one is.
No. 1662520
>>1662456You're right. I'm sick of men being like this. I don't have any means of telling her what happened, so I can only hope for the best for her and silently apologise.
When I rejected his advances and made it clear I was only going to support him, that's when he escalated things and started talking about planning to meet up with other women more local to him. He even signed up to a cheating website and was gonna hook up with a woman who was in an open marriage and amenable to his litany of kinks his wife wasn't into, even the fucked up ones. I told him that he could give his wife something if he did that, yet it wasn't enough to dissuade him. She's not wired for what he wants, he's broached the topic with her many times and she's shut him down each time but since their talk, she's apparently said she's willing to try and do the 'non-horrible' stuff with him. Part of me wants to know why she's agreed to this, because after what he's told her, she'd be able to file for divorce - but I think she's hoping therapy will fix things. I don't really understand their dynamic.
I very much believe that he's primarily staying with her out of convenience, and him coming 'clean' was basically him doing a hail Mary because he was still breadcrumbing a future relationship with me. While I do think he loves her in his own way, he doesn't respect her. When the topic of divorce was brought up, the first things he talked about were the things he'd lose rather than how it'd affect her.
>>1662483I'm unable to tell her anything. I don't want revenge, either. I just want to move on from it, and venting here helped.
>>1662494Surprisingly, in spite of his litany of kinks, I never sent him nudes or anything like that (for which I'm thankful). It was basic phone sex, nothing extreme, him sending me explicit videos/photos of himself, and buying me things/wanting to buy me clothes. He was ready to fly out/fly me in for sex/to be spoiled, though, which is probably when the other kinks would've been explored, I'm guessing. I spoke to my friend about this and she thinks he's very repressed, idk.
No. 1662562
>>1662543I don't have enough information to find her. I didn't want to pry about her at all when I was involved with him because it would make me feel more guilty about what I was doing if I knew. I know he's already hurt her by cheating, but I don't believe he would do those things to her - he wanted to cheat with me/those women IRL to get that gratification without pressuring her because I guess he'd given up on being able to be sexually experimental with her. He told me that he thought that maybe she would become more amenable to it over the years, but realised that wasn't the case. He justified wanting to cheat because he wanted to remain respectful of his wife's boundaries whilst still getting what he wanted like it was 'ethical cheating', I guess. I disagreed and told him that he needed to have therapy with her, or if it was that much of a dealbreaker even after getting professional help, to end things. If I were in her position, I'd want to know the truth but it's not a matter of me not wanting to inform her; it's that I simply can't.
>>1662551Because I don't have a social media presence beyond gaming platforms, and that is where we communicated and AFAIK, she isn't on those. I'm not bragging because being a side chick isn't anything to be proud of or brag about. I know what I did, and I have to live with that.
No. 1662567
File: 1691864173220.jpeg (27.38 KB, 720x480, IMG_2429.jpeg)
My mum just randomly told me over dinner that she watched a video online that said Michelle Obama is a secret trans. She got mad when I told her that she’s probably just watching weird MAGA propaganda shit. Why are older people so quick to call us naive but will then go and believe everything they see on the internet?
No. 1662568
>>1662562can't you make a throwaway account? theres even temporary e-mails and phone numbers if that's your problem. then you can have your proof then too
also
>he told mei don't know why you would believe anything that man says
No. 1662585
File: 1691865347241.gif (188.52 KB, 220x165, just-go-on-the-internet-and-te…)
>>1662567could you show her this? I honestly feel like it helps people stop and think about what they're seeing online lol
No. 1662648
I was anxious about my boyfriend's mentally ill mother inviting herself to dinner today (it wasn't planned), and somehow she made things even worse than usual. Shows up, complains she's hungry and has us wait on her and bring her juice and baked goods, watches us cook extra dishes for her sake, then complains she's not hungry and refuses to have dinner. Why couldn't she say so before we cooked everything? Why does she then stick around for hours being loud and annoying? I really do try to have empathy for her because it's not her fault she's mentally ill and her meds don't work but she's truly unbearable. I get why most of the family never interacts with her, she's not just a weirdo who constantly mumbles to herself, she's not only mildly scary (when she does things like randomly unlock and open our front door, look through my belongings and put them back in different places, and wave knives around), she's also insanely demanding and ungrateful for everything people do to accomodate her. Sometimes I don't know if it's worth it staying with my boyfriend even though I love him dearly, because she's just so awful and requires so much supervision that there's no way we'll ever distance ourselves from her. I know it weighs on him too but he does nothing to try and pursue a change of meds for her (and she won't do it herself because her moments of lucidity are so rare that she mostly thinks she doesn't need them), so things will never change.
No. 1662695
Neighbor asked if I was having twins. I'm not insecure about it because 1. I Weigh 120 pounds, 2. I was wearing baggy clothes, 3. I wasn't even showing really. What the fuck was her angle?
>>1662671You can do both. Tbh ugly women get treated by absolute dirt. There's no reason she can't try to get the privileges granted to beautiful women while also complaining about that being the case. Its like complaining about how people hate slave labor while owning an iPhone. The slave labor is the issue not the phone.
>>1662632Honestly the hentai is a bigger problem then the furry. I looked at a doujin website once and couldn't believe how fucked up literally everything was. I just wanted something semi-normal and could not find it, gave up. Hentai is the most depraved form of porn out there. Having a big interest in anime was always a red flag for me. Idc if I can't talk about death note with him, at least he's not watching whatever that anime megumin is from.
No. 1662709
File: 1691875337309.jpg (160.67 KB, 1600x1071, hammy.jpg)
I feel so dumb for being so heartbroken over a moid but I've been crying for days now and my chest hurts and I just wish I could move on or distract myself with other things but he's on my mind 24/7. Why am I acting like a teenager who got her heart broken the first time aaaaaaaaah this sucks so much. I know he's not worth it yada yada TELL THAT TO MY HEART AND MIND NONNIES. I'm a mess.
No. 1662728
>>1662695my ex moid watched porn prior to getting together with me and that was enough for him to guilt me into doing anal on a regular basis, porn damages their brains. hentai has to be the most unhinged kind of porn out there because there are literally no limits to how depraved it can be.
if ‘regular’ porn can get a moid to guilt his girlfriend into anal i don’t want think about what hentaifags want to do to any woman unfortunate enough to be with them. run anon
No. 1662787
>>1662782Oh my god
nonnie, I'm so sorry. Are you at the hospital right now? Do you know if she's in surgery?
No. 1662797
>>1662795You're making me cry thank you so much.
>>1662788I forgot to reply earlier but thank you. I'm so sorry about your father and it's wonderful that you were loved by him.
No. 1662815
File: 1691885767065.jpg (50.43 KB, 735x702, a45e802d66da0ef51696a563c8c19b…)
God saved me from dying, yet, it seems my life is going nowhere it just keeps getting worse, my heart aches deeply as my regrets and all the pain around me increases again, I want to scream and cry, I want to kill, I want to destroy, I want to heal. God makes me go through trauma just to keep me alive another day anyway and I just don't get it. What should I do? Is this supposed to happen? What's the endgame? I don't want to suffer anymore, I don't want to witness pain and injustice over and over. Why did you save me Lord? I'm so full of pain and sadness, I hate myself and the world around me, I'm full of fear and hatred. I'm hurting…and I'm lost
No. 1662840
>>1662816That's a good resolution, nonna. I hope she stands by your side, but if she doesn't, don't let her beat you down or badger you into saying it wasn't wrong. Because it was wrong. He was being extremely nasty and trying to coerce you into sex. If you find yourself doubting, remember that multiple women have your back. Keep
>>1662017 in mind and take care of yourself.
I know it feels impossible, but try to take your mind off it for now. If you can, buying yourself a smoothie or similar treat can help you feel better. Good luck, let us know how it goes.
No. 1662854
File: 1691888713106.jpg (56.67 KB, 431x600, et-david-coulier-que-l-on-conn…)
>>1662117The real public enemy no.1
No. 1662902
File: 1691892650568.jpg (36.55 KB, 448x511, 778.jpg)
>Go to doctor for extreme social anxiety
>Describe my problems
>Nona it sounds like you have autism spectrum disorder, you should get evaluated. Here, let me write you a referral
What the fuck
No. 1662943
File: 1691897521806.gif (1.19 MB, 368x368, su-zaizai (1).gif)
Welp. I'm about to do something extremely stupid. Nonnas may think "ok? this post makes no sense in the vent thread because you aren't even venting" but trust me, once I mess it up, I'll come back crying here with an update and then vent to my heart's content on my favourite mongolian basket weaving forum.
No. 1662966
>>1661947what the fuck… why are men such pigs
>>1662947what's her take?
don't take her immediate reaction as definitive, she is probably hirr and confused and will come to her senses
No. 1662973
>>1662970it's her decision, you can't force her to make the right one
she'll realize sooner or later that he's a pathetic manipulative coomer and you'll have to hold back your "told you so"
do you have other places to live in? can you move out?
No. 1663010
>>1661947Report him. Can't you do that? Next time he does it, try to get proof by having him text you that stuff, bonus if he mentions your sister being involved. Incest is illegal imo and even if he doesn't get in trouble for that, he will get in trouble for sexual harassment.
I'm sorry that you went through something like that, no one deservesthis.
No. 1663065
File: 1691911715755.jpeg (14.44 KB, 300x300, 11A7CBAE-178E-46C8-8DE3-2E653E…)
I never want to see a jort ever again in my life. Why did jorts suddenly come out of nowhere, like I saw people talk about how they were going to be huge this summer, and I suppose to own looking foolish, have decided to wear them out of spite and I guess everyone is just wearing them. I have to see them in real life and online. I really do not understand. You are lying to yourself the second you out on a jort. I can let some cases slide, that’s not really what I’m talking about. It seems like these pants and this type of silhouette has been constant lately and I don’t get it. I also never want to hear the phrase babygirl ever again. It’s been run into the ground and people don’t have enough courtesy and decency to know when to stop pummeling that shit into the ground. Every single anime character I know regardless of whatever the fuck is being called babygirl and I just don’t have enough tolerance. I don’t know if I can handle geto being called babygirl for the 25,473rd time, I really can’t. You’d think after a while people would just say it in their heads but no. They have to say it out loud.
No. 1663126
>>1662947>>1662970I'm sorry but she's so fucking retarded, everyone here is being lax with her but I can just
feel all the bullshit she will allow him to do, she has zero backbone and doesn't respect herself nor her own blood, this could go south faster than you think. If a dick is more important than your sister's safety you're less than dirt in my eyes, mark my words the moment that faggot assaults you and shit hits the fan for real, she's going to side with him again, pathetic
No. 1663173
>>1663164>he looks annoyed every timeUgh that's so unattractive. Don't have sex with him.
>>1663172>He's having sex with you in public she never said that
No. 1663174
>>1663172In public? What are you talking about?
>>1663168I'll tell him, thanks nonna. If he doesn't listen it's out the door. I'm not gonna cry over this shit any longer.
No. 1663176
>>1663173>>1663174She said
>>>1663148>we just can't have a nice day out without him wanting to have sex or touch me or whateverI understood that as him doing it in settings outside of home. But still she shouldn't just write it off as "I love him and I'm too stupid to say no and I don't mind but I do but…"
No. 1663181
File: 1691923146259.jpg (32.2 KB, 640x508, happu.jpg)
I had such a sad dream tonight, sage4no1curr
I often get these dreams that for some reason I have to return to school for another year because "a mistake happened" or something and I actually haven't finished, well, this time, I was brought back with my old classmates that I had before I changed schools in high school due to bullying. All of them plus some randos were there.
What I remember is that something happened and they ended up being snobbish and dismissive and I remember blowing up at them (something I never had the courage to do back in jr high) and I yelled at them "Well fuck you, you and everybody in this class I used to go to school with bullied me relentlessly so why are you talking now?" and I looked over the classroom and I saw my old best friend from back then acting exremely embarassed of my reaction, this friend actually stuck with me through thick and thin and then later on completely betrayed me (I've actually talked about her in another thread) and then I said "Except [her name] who now won't even speak to me". Now that I remember, I initially did not recognize them but I ended up being ostracized from that imaginary classroom and I was thinking "it has happened again, I am the problem" and then their faces morphed into them and dream me realized it's them.
I have no idea why this dream stuck with me so much. Growing up we became really different people and I kinda feel sorry for their yuppie boring cookie cutter lives and I wouldn't say I'm jealous of them at all. I just think, honestly, that all I wanted when I was a kid was to be accepted and be cool with everyone and maybe that's why I'm sad. To end this on a positive note, when I changed schools I had so much fun and while I still didn't completey fit in I had people around me which we shared insterests with and the people that I wouldn't get along with would mind their business and so did I.
No. 1663198
>>1663117>>1663126Why are you being such an aggro weirdo. She's heartbroken because she has said she is very close to her sister, shitting on her sister isn't going to help. She knows her sister is wrong. Everything you've said about the boyfriend is what we've already told her.
>If I were you I would be openly hostile to him every chance I got, like if he says “good morning” when you cross paths in the house I would deadpan him and say in a clear loud voice “hey remember when you asked me if you could eat my pussy? Remember how you asked your girlfriends little sister if you could eat her pussy? How’d that go, are you still thinking about that? By the way when are you getting out of my fucking house you fucking scumbag?”This is shit tier advice. All this will do is anger a dangerous scrote and further alienate her sister who has already refused to give up her boyfriend. Op never clarified whose house it is, but she wouldn't be moving out if she had any other choice. This isn't helpful.
No. 1663209
>>1663207Are you the person who also posted
>>1663070 because you are not trying to help, you are mocking her. She was shaken by the encounter and came to anons for advice, and then came to the conclusion that he was behaving inappropriately and she needed to talk to her sister about him. That's not "being manipulated", she doesn't need to "snap the fuck out" of anything. You seem like somebody who just wants to be condescending to people who don't need your dangerous and out of touch advice.
No. 1663213
File: 1691925929124.png (81.24 KB, 398x302, 1c418b660b8672d37fddd8f207cf52…)
I can't fucking stand my personality. It's the only aspect of myself I haven't been able to mould to my liking and it's killing me. I've managed to stop myself from being romantically attracted to other people because the way I used to act when I liked someone made my skin crawl out of shame and embarrassment. I'm no longer interested in others like that, probably not even as friends, but the way I act around people who are my friends (mostly online) is tearing me apart. I say the most out-of-pocket, autistic, retarded nonsense or overshare info about myself that makes no sense to share and makes me look like a drooling, attention-seeking retard. I hate it so much; and no matter how hard I try, I lose the little control over my behaviour I have insanely quickly. I don't care if some might find it charming or funny, I just want to be as neutral of a person as possible.
I'm seriously considering taking some kind of drugs that turn me quiet and normal. What could help with that? I've heard that small doses of amphetamines like xanax tend to completely shut people's brains up and let them be just as efficient as they are when not under the influence, but without the hyperactive personality/behaviour they normally have. I'm getting desperate–I've hated my behaviour since I was a kid. It used to annoy the fuck out of all the other kids and now I'm worried about it being the same. I just want my online friends to think of me as a regular person, not as if I'm erratic and have some kind of cluster-B personality disorder. Do genuinely recommend me something, nonas, I don't care if I have to turn into a druggie at this point.
No. 1663217
>>1663213I am just like you. I have just coped by not involving myself so much in communities where I might overshare or act dumb, and I've taught myself to be VERY cautious of what I do or say. I always give myself time to think "what could happen if I say this?" and then after going through it I don't say it at all. I also write my stupid ramblings on Libre Office. I don't share these texts with anyone but I can vent out that way and then later see how stupid it was.
I'd suggest to keep yourself busy with activities that don't require the presence of other people. For me it's going to the gym, taking walks, cleaning, drawing and reading. I check Discord communities once a day but most of that time goes to reading what other people have said so I don't say anything stupid myself.
No. 1663231
>>1663216>i hate i can see myself in them sometimesThis is something I notice with certain friends I have, too. It's always the same thing about how much they annoy me at first, but then I realise I'm barely any different. I'll look into ritalin, thanks a lot, nona.
>>1663217I get what you mean, and playing video games, walking, listening to music, working out, reading, etc. do help a little. My problem is that while I generally don't talk to people a lot and I spend most of my day completely on my own, when I'm having a game night or a random discussion with friends, the sperg in me will just unearth itself. It's like it's waiting for the right time when I'm around people and I just suddenly can't shut myself up. I was saying these kinds of things in a 4chan general I frequent at one point in time, which made me snap out of it and calm down a little, but my behaviour is still not fit to my liking.
>>1663220>meds can help you be less impulsive and more organized but they don't stop you from being a self-hating idiot, unfortunately.Yeah… I feel that a part of this definitely stems from self-hatred. I've never been a big believer in things like ADHD (because everyone and their mother gets diagnosed with it these days), and the place I live has no psychiatry infrastructure unless you have problems so severe you basically need horse tranquiliser to function, so a diagnosis like that most likely wouldn't be possible, anyway. But I have a friend who could help me get my hands on meds like that, so not all hope is lost.
No. 1663361
>>1663198We are not the same anon. Also this
>>1663221, if she doesn't leave that moid she's putting her sister on danger by allowing him to stay further, I will
not respect such trash behavior, her failed relationship with a creep shouldn't be more important than her own family's safety
No. 1663426
>>1663412maybe did you think it's potentially like weaponized incompetence? like weaponized ignorance? hate to say it but does this man actually know anything? I'd say FUCKING LEAVE but the whole reeee nigels shit here is 1. tiring 2. unrealistic.
in the mean time 1. leave him or 2. teach him. somehow the responsibility is always on us.
p.s. don't get knocked up, if he's this useless already he's probs gonna troon out
sorry to be mean I know it's a vent but HOLY SHIT men are audacious
No. 1663432
File: 1691947847924.jpeg (39.32 KB, 750x725, FzPXxiSaMAEZLJ8.jpeg)
I've been having these weird and awful nightmares for the past 3 days, it isn't even like one or two dreams, more like 3-4 dreams in just one night that are quite vivid and I can't help but remember them, which makes it even weirder because I usually don't remember dreams this clearly. I have no idea why it's even happening. The nightmares mostly tend to be about people close to me killing me or betraying me, and it's really awkward looking at those same people in the morning…
No. 1663433
File: 1691947865810.png (288.63 KB, 540x679, Your awesome 2 thumbs up.png)
>>1662237I'm back to say that my toe feels so much better. No even anymore pain, just a sort of tingly feeling when I press on it. There's still pus that comings out so I just pour some hydrogen peroxide on it when that happens.
No. 1663445
>>1663433soak that bad boi in bi carb or hydrogen peroxide for like 5-10 if it's feeling painful and/or gooey. hydrogen peroxide is a legit godsend. glad it feels better sweet nona!
>>1663437ayrt sorry cutie you're right, you're here to vent and I kinda did the whole kill all nigels thing while complaining about it. sorry to be a hypocrite
that is fucking annoying and you just came here to blaze and vent sorry bby
how is the old (no funny word for uterus) mine sucks and it is 100% in the uterus not the head
No. 1663509
File: 1691951355982.jpg (23.64 KB, 474x486, th-1875683174.jpg)
My scrote has been saying that we should recosinder our relationship since I said him that I will be diagnosed as autistic.
I know that I wasn't the perfect girlfriend because I used to vent a lot because of my anxiety.
He tells me that he loves me but he is not sure how to take care of me and that things like these are starting to worry him.
He has been acting distant since I told him about my autism. We are going to meet this tuesday to talk, but I don't know what to say. I love him and I don't want this relationship to end.
Please nonnas help me what to do.
No. 1663544
>>1663509How's your relationship otherwise? Is he loving and supportive of you? I can only judge him by your post but if he seriously considers this a dealbreaker, despite all the love he has for you, then I'd leave him. What if you get sick or have an accident in the future where you'd need his care and support but he decides to leave you because it's "too much" for him? It would be better to find someone who truly cares for you and will be there for you in times of need. I know you love him nona, but you deserve someone who love you too and who won't use your autism as an excuse to possibly end the relationship. A diagnosis is just a confirmation for your autism but you spent all this time with your boyfriend but
now he wants to consider ending it? Not before? I wish you all the best and I hope I'm just wrong about him but please consider this.
No. 1663644
>>1663509Not sure how to take care of you?
Are you asking him to be your caretaker and to have a life plan?
Jeez, if he doesn't want to date the 'tists that's fine but he shouldn't be so patronizing. I presume not much will change post diagnosis? What difference does it make? He was attracted to you fine before…
No. 1663716
File: 1691965369024.jpg (54.64 KB, 600x600, krabs.jpg)
Lately, everytime I eat something high on sugar, 10 minutes after I feel sleepy, anxious and my feet run cold. I'm not fat, but I do suffer from anxiety and IBS, maybe those are the problems, but I do fear I've something fucked up on my sugar levels, I don't think that's possible neither tbh but I'm just pissed I cannot eat fun sugary stuff without getting knocked out. It happened with a choco bar, then a pudding, now a Kool-aid drink. Aight
No. 1663741
File: 1691967309568.jpeg (32.06 KB, 648x670, art.jpeg)
>posts pretty floral tattoos that I loved
>"these remind me of shayna's veiny tit"
Ugh. I hate anons who bring up her and her tits in random places, the tattoos didn't even look like veins or anything? but then again, I've never really visited her thread so it's not like I know what her tits look like and why them being veiny is such a big deal.
No. 1663745
File: 1691967661380.jpeg (7.49 KB, 378x480, images.jpeg)
>>1663743I won't roll and you can't make me roll.
No. 1663753
File: 1691968523952.jpg (91.33 KB, 680x680, ezgif-5-83b7fd5bf0.jpg)
I start classes again tomorrow and i am DREADING it. I don't want to go, i'd rather die. Sure it's a choice, but is it really?
No. 1663766
File: 1691969321561.gif (37.12 KB, 106x105, FHJOKTNVZWOLH.gif)
>>1663762Where the fuck do you live anon I just wanna talk
No. 1663771
File: 1691969762710.webm (475.12 KB, 576x1024, w-4SWeaR9uBoHwrx.webm)
>>1663768Don't you dare complete that sentence
No. 1663855
Something has happened today that has me more shaken up than I think I've ever been.
The big back story:
Several years ago I met a man that was working with my (at the time) boyfriend. This man, married, immediately began sending me inappropriate pictures and messages. Curious though I was, I sluffed him off out of dedication to my partner. Eventually he backed off.
Fast forward to about 3 years ago now - he's single, I'm single..we hook up. I had no idea what I was getting myself into and was immediately overwhelmed and backed out of the interaction.. inevitably leading to him telling me I was too insecure and needy, that our beliefs didn't align, and he didn't see a future with me.
But he continued to poke around every so often and now I'm here. After talking with one of his other conquests last summer, I discovered he is heavily involved in the occult and sex magick. I had suspected this for some time and, to be perfectly honest, was very curious. Beginning of this July we hang out, nothing sexual at all. It was a really good night, he agreed. A couple weeks later I approached him about a sexual fantasy I'd had for a very long time and he was very excited about making it happen. In the process of negotiation, and me learning and exploring, him and I hooked up a couple more times.
Sex with him is.. like nothing I've ever experienced. I threw myself into the unknown and swam around.
To my knowledge, he had been seeing someone for a while the beginning of this year. Currently, he told me they were not in contact. I found out last night that is not true and I found out completely my accident. Got curious about FetLife and stumbled down this whole ass rabbit hole. Mind you, he knows I'm curious and go poking about and ask all the questions…he's always encouraged this.
I spent last night in a k-hole - distraught, confused, deceived. I brought it up today in probably a bit too defensive of a way and he was not happy with me. Told me he didn't appreciate people prying around in his personal life (despite the earlier encouragement..). He told me we'd always be friends but no more intimacy.
I thought I understood what I was getting myself into in giving myself to him. But the way I'm feeling this evening is near impossible to wrap my brain around.. I want pain more than I ever have. It's taking quite a lot of focus and effort not to hurt myself in some way. I want to grovel and undo and atone. I apologized for breaking a boundary.. because I have always felt the need to apologize me entire life when things go sideways no matter how at fault I am.. but tonight I want to throw myself into the fire. It's been several hours since I've spoken to him and I've been fighting muscle spasms, mind convulsions, and gut wrenching guilt. The logical part of my brain knows I'm being absolutely insane, but I really don't understand what's going on.
If anyone has any insight, advice, or guidance I would be most appreciative. Am I just going insane or is there something darker at play here?
No. 1663869
File: 1691981101610.jpg (130.44 KB, 1200x859, E8sdajyXIAIhT2y.jpg)
The people of my country just elected a racist misogynist as president and I couldn't be more sad and angry. All the rights won by women and minorities are going down the toilet and there's nothing I can do about it. I wish I had money to go to a better country but I don't have it so I have to live in this fucking shithole.
No. 1663918
>>1663900Tell your mom anyways. Even if your sister resents you for awhile, it doesn't matter. Her boyfriend has an infatuation with you and literally came to you under manipulative pretenses mentioning loaded insinuations of wanting to
trust you more and trying to get you to let him perform a sex act on you. He's going to lie abou the whole thing and revise it soon, whi is why he is in your sister's ear. They're both living under your mothers roof and he doesn't deserve any of that charity. Stop pussyfooting around it because with the amount of consideration and subservience you currently have about the situation, you are going to be buried. Put your foot down. Your sister is a cuck.
No. 1663926
File: 1691987500313.jpeg (59.15 KB, 880x542, IMG_0439.jpeg)
I’m so lame. I have no personality. I get obsessed with things and give up so fast so I can’t even make friends based off my hobbies and I’m too weird to be a normie. I’m so ugly and autistic and retarded. I wish I was literally anyone else. I hate myself so much.
No. 1663942
>>1663544He loves and supports me, he says is the fact that sometimes is too much for him when I have panic attacks because of my anxiety and tism, he just doesn't know how to help me further and is startling him.
>>1663585My best friend agrees with you, he doesn't knows how to commit when someone is sick. Bonus info, his mom is bipolar and he also had anxiety's problems.
>>1663644Yeah, I know. He was attracted to me before when I wasn't treated for my anxiety but now a tism diagnosis changes everything? I don't know anymore. I love him and I would be by his side if he was afflicted with the tism, but my biggest error in my life is to think that people will be as nice as I am to them to me, especially moids.
No. 1663951
I don't think that others will ever treat me like I'm human.
For the
victims, this connotes a sense that others do not care about their feelings, thoughts, suffering and pain.
In sum, to feel less human is to experience the utmost devaluation and exclusion from the human status, moral domain, and fundamental shared superordinate identity of being human
https://bpspsychub.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/bjso.12633.
I was reading this article and I realized that all of my interactions with other people have been dehumanizing and that I am always being placed in a position of inferiority, devalued, that my feelings don't matter. That I end up being demonized and excluded over a simple opinion or disagreement hence that strips me of any humanity. Someone that is regarded less than human is not allowed to express disagreement
(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE) No. 1664072
>>1664017OP here n yeah i agree. I love zick and i wish they werent attached to juicy thighed retards
>>1663993Ily nonna
No. 1664089
File: 1692002773358.jpeg (111.36 KB, 1000x1000, 60d01ecd-7dcd-4949-81da-2a450f…)
>>1664086Okay so go be asexual
No. 1664163
File: 1692009912190.png (493.37 KB, 700x394, 426068-puddle-reflection-sky-A…)
I just read something that said there are indicators that a woman has respect for herself and was raised to value herself, that some of these indicators present as treating yourself gently and with care, "can be as small as stepping over water puddles."
Might sound kind of dumb but it blew my mind a little because I have a friend who does not have that self respect and I noticed one day she just trampled right through this big ass puddle. She knew it was there, just didn't bother to go around. I remember thinking it was weird and I kinda scolded her because her shoes were preforated and it would give her cold wet socks.
This girl gets a fair amount of attention from guys even though she is in a relationship, meanwhile I'm consistently fawned over for my appearance but I don't get that many guys actually interested in dating me and am told by male coworkers that they were kinda scared to joke around with me because i seem intimidating. I realized what I always suspected for a while, that guys prefer to go after easier targets and don't want to have to rise to meet a woman who has standards for her treatment.
No. 1664192
File: 1692011682727.gif (7.64 MB, 640x640, 200838FC-BE53-47C3-BB80-8B0665…)
I didn’t get the rental and it would’ve been the escape from my crazy family.
No. 1664196
>>1664180That mindset doesn't really help anyone tbh. If you're constantly holding yourself back to "not be a bother", you're doing yourself a disservice, and you eventually breed resentment
Idk if I was you nonna, I'd keep looking for friends until you find someone who lets you be a tard and likes it. I have someone who lets me sperg about all my interests, including new ones. It isn't a hardship at all to return the favor because I like her so much the conversation doesn't bore me
And like other nonna said, just get a bunch of different friends and acquaintances who are also deeply passionate about certain topics so you guys can dork out together. You don't have to form a deep relationship with every single person you meet.
No. 1664222
File: 1692015371837.jpeg (52.86 KB, 620x402, 63c615e7-b529-48c6-be07-76a071…)
Every month without fail I end up feeling extremely depressed and suicidal around my period. I’ve been up since 3 am crying my eyes out over family, friends, the state of the world, every abused and neglected animal, my own problems. Only one week more to go with this bullshit!
No. 1664227
File: 1692015816681.jpg (183.83 KB, 1024x788, apu.jpg)
I can feel the scrote influence and internalized misoginy leave my body little by little since I've replaced browsing 4chan by browsing lolcow
I'm not even a coomer anymore
Thank nonnies for this place
No. 1664242
>>1664238Anon, your situation is far from hopeless. I'd tell you to un-fuck your life step by step, but it's not particularly fucked as is. You have enough skills to keep a job. You can into relationships. You sound like a normal person. You're just unhappy.
From what I see, your main source of stress right now is your job. Focus on ditching it and finding a better one.
No. 1664363
File: 1692031231466.jpg (42.63 KB, 735x760, 83c31f71f38fd0f4204fc6d5e87d85…)
This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass This too shall pass
No. 1664365
>>1664328In a few days anon will update us with a story on how she had to escape her friend who is not human, but rather a creature that pretends to be human to lure in her
victims.
No. 1664389
>>1664386Hey, how did you find out? You can report him to the police bc sharing/uploading nudes without ur consent is a crime.
I'm sorry,
nonnie. What a disgusting predator.
No. 1664395
File: 1692032916206.jpg (12.16 KB, 340x272, 33b7704f7d8e8d010249a6cfaf3c8c…)
I fucking hate my hyperfixation phases. This is why I'm scared of pursuing interest in media, because once I do get into something I can't stop thinking about it and obviously I love the high but dear god the void that's left in me after I get burned out is painful enough to scare me out of watching/reading/playing interesting shit so I won't feel these intense emotions again. I just want to enjoy things like a normal person please brain
No. 1664402
>>1664395I'm the same way
nonnie and I also refrained from getting into things bc the way I like them is cringe, but now IDC anymore. You should enjoy things, shame is the life killer.
No. 1664415
>>1664386You're not ugly. Report them all, you didn't deserve this and I'm sure you looked much much better than those men all compiled together. Please don't send identifying nudes from now on, don't ever feature your face.
You're perfect as you are and you should never let some incels whose only source of women are their friends gfs determine your selfworth.
No. 1664476
File: 1692037225561.jpeg (37.93 KB, 735x396, IMG_0016.jpeg)
can't fall back asleep because it's too late in the day and my heart burns so if I do I'll probably die in my nightmares
tfw been stuck between zero sleep and too much sleep for weeks now and then my dads office is right next to my room, the walls are paper thin. he doesn't mean to but his loud voice during his work calls has no respect for my circadian rhythms and there's no other place or room in the house I can sleep in.
I want to punch my fucking mirror to pieces
No. 1664524
File: 1692039915088.jpg (39.54 KB, 750x717, confused distressed kitten.jpg)
Ninety. Five. Degrees. Fahreinheight.
No. 1664540
>>1664312thank you
nonnie, just wanted to say I feel a little better after having some food in my belly that or my antidepressant hit
No. 1664606
File: 1692044741674.gif (420.53 KB, 498x197, titanic-band.gif)
A painting I had been working on for two weeks got fucked up by me being careless, and for days I wasn't able to move past it. Tried to fix it. Made it worse. Ended up putting on the sad string quartet music from Titanic and mourning the loss while painting over the canvas in order to finally move on.
So I am sorry, dear painting, that my careless hands smudged you beyond repair. You were the one thing who was supposed to bring me out of my art block, and now you're dead. I loved the idea of you, and may there come a day again when I will find the motivation to paint what might be a newfound version of you once more. RIP.
No. 1664626
File: 1692045620057.png (231.63 KB, 700x700, E7ydZPsVIAEPf16.png)
Once again, as Ive posted before… I just can't find any girl friends. All my interests are extremely male and my way of bantering is extremely male. I've tried to befriend women in my workplace but it just fails completely. All the guys I can chit chat with for hours but women? It hits a wall immediately. And I'm not saying it's because of them, not the slightest, it's all clearly my autistic redditor ass' fault.
My boyfriend is starting to understandably find it problematic as I can't really go hang out with any of my friends. He finds it weird that I want to go to a show with 4 of my (obviously,male) friends and holy fuck I'd love for them to be women. GOD I would love if I connected with a woman, just one. But I have never had a close female friend and now in my mid twenties, I just dont know.
It's been this way since preschool- I remember my parents expressing concern with a teacher regarding my exclusively male friend group. Didn't change after puberty, just got more uncomfortable for obvious reasons. It's no wonder I fakeboi'd for a whole year.
No. 1664698
File: 1692049057616.jpg (76.28 KB, 1024x989, 1685142021930867.jpg)
I fucking hate this fucking job, I was supposed to work on upcoming sunday and I was so happy I'm going to earn extra money, also I've been planned on this particular sunday in fucking february. Half a year ago. And today I found out my coordinator planned another girl instead of me (also this girl belongs to my coordinator's family btw) and nobody even told me about it before doing it and nobody asked me if I agreed to this. I found out
when the deed was already done. The worst thing is I didn't have the courage to go to my manager and say I didn't agree to this and it's not fair to take from me working sunday that I knew about since half a year. It's not my problem someone is missing working hours. That doesn't mean they should take mine. And it wouldn't even happen if that girl wasn't my coordinator's family. I fucking hate this. Now it's probably too late since I didn't oppose this the moment I found out they did it and they would probably treat me like I did something bad and I'm a filthy egoist for fighting for this sunday. Also I'm scared how my coordinator might react if she found out I didn't "allow" this girl to work on sunday instead of me… Why am I constantly getting disrespected ffs?? Last year when I only had 3 or 4 working days nobody fucking cared and nobody took extra days from other people in order to give them to me. Now I can't even have one week of 6 working days a month because another girl has only 3 working days and that's "unfair" and that means they have to take from me one day that I reserved 6 months ago. I'm so angry I can't sleep
No. 1664716
>>1664467>"she don't like black people"I'm with you on this one. That sounds extremely awkward and uncomfortable with them bringing up race out of absolutely nowhere like that. I hate when
poc do that shit. Hilarious that he somehow tried to make himself seem like a
victim in this scenario.
No. 1664884
File: 1692068110828.jpg (74.42 KB, 640x543, 1f57152069250fc6e933c25218a7fb…)
I'm honestly shocked that my friends (who I really haven't known for very long, less than a year) were exposed to all of my craziness during my mental breakdown and still want to keep me around. I can't help but feel it's out of pity, though
No. 1664906
File: 1692069494058.png (106.87 KB, 275x236, IMG_2341.png)
>>1664884Maybe it’s not pity. Maybe u r a likeable person and fun to be around and deserve 2 be loved in spite of your craziness.
No. 1665047
File: 1692081715999.jpeg (632.68 KB, 2048x1785, bestcakerecipe.jpeg)
i'm going in to pack up the things from my office at my last job at 7am and i can't sleep. i hate that i'm not working there anymore, i wish i still was, i basically had a mental breakdown and should have taken FLMA but i never use my phone or anything other than my laptop, and my imessage via laptop didn't send (and i didn't get their message, resulting in my firing. my supervisor said you need to come to work at some point x date and i didn't because i never received said text.) basically i feel like shit. i finally worked with a bunch of women i respected and enjoyed working with. owners still were dumb but whatever. i could write a fucking poem about how much i loved my supervisor, she honestly is the best kind of person to work under. good constructive criticism, puts you in line, is soft when you need it. if i wasn't moving in a few months i would have tried to beg them to take me back. i kind of want to just ask if i can work part time without benefits until i move because i was in the middle of making them a training manual for my position (they didn't ask, but when i found out i was moving i didn't want someone else to deal with the literally zero training material that i dealt with when i started working there). i was only done with like 1/8th of it on page 15. this was during my breaks and downtime by the way lol.
fuck. idk what to say to her, idk if i should ask if i can just continue to work part time with no benefits since they haven't eliminated me from the payroll, i don't know what to do i know no one will read this but typing things out or just screaming into the void helps me figure out what to do or say.
i want to just go chainsmoke but when i walked out last night some weird man and his big ass dog just sat and looked directly at me while his dog took a massive long shit (over a minute) and then proceeded to not pick up the poop. i pick up my cigarette butts and you can't even pick up your dog shit? okay i am done i hate this place so much
No. 1665055
>>1665047it sucks too because this was the only place i have worked at in this current place that has made me feel good. before covid i worked at a female driven workplace as well and was super happy and fulfilled. when i found out i was moving and had to start all over career wise for the third time in five years and would be 3000 miles from any family member or friend i think my brain cracked. it's still cracked.
i'm so tired of starting over. once you're over 25, it's not fun anymore. i have so many fucking 401ks that i haven't joined, idk what the fucking term is for it because fuck you, i still have 24k in student loan debt that was inexplicably moved to a different loan servicer that says interest will be accruing by the end of the month YET THERE IS NO INTEREST RATE all it says is "interest rates are set by congress"
THANKS, THAT MAKES IT HELPFUL FOR PEOPLE TO BE ABLE TO BUDGET
No. 1665061
>>1665055not sageing this because i didn't realize this happened and that we need to be auditing it i guess: anyone who has federal loans through navient, they are through AIDVANTAGE but you can still use your navient loan through their website.
the beautiful part is they do not say what your loan rates are, only that congress will decide. and also the dates are very nebulous imo based off the emails and the website not making any fucking sense,
eg: if you sign up for autopay (i always do, as do most people because you already should budget your rent, car, insurance, phone, loans, hopefully on two different dates) whatever
if you sign up for autopay it will take .25% off of your interest (nice, cool, i appreciate that) but WHEN IT DOESN'T EVEN SAY YOUR LOAN RATE LEVELS ANYMORE IT'S SCARY. for subsidized that would be really helpful; pay off your unsubsidized first and use income based repayment for the subsidized. god i feel manic at this point because no one understands why this is so fucked up and so weird. the 'new' website they made says my expected payoff of 24k of student loan debt is 2034.
2034.
2034.
most people pay off a car loan in 3-4 years.
No. 1665068
File: 1692084116935.png (61.36 KB, 1432x338, savingonapileofshit.png)
>>1665064also what the fuck is this shit
i do not want to make anyone think that an education is not worth it, it is. i wouldn't trade mine for the fucking world and i have a very small amount of debt compared to most people. but i just think it's weird that i haven't heard anything about this. there will be a lot of people who could get fucked if they miss a loan repayment, can't figure out why their autopayments through navient aren't going through and are destroying their credit score, i could go on but you get the idea. this is fucked.
to anyone that has federal loan debts they do not have to actually be paid until the end of sept (they say oct but don't let them fuck you with the late fees/dates/trying to find your payment while your credit score tanks.)
No. 1665330
>>1665047Aww Nonna I'm so sorry. Idk if it helps but I'm
>>1664884 and my mental breakdown led to me bring fired as well. (It was really fucked up, actually, I took FMLA and spent 6 weeks getting my life back on track only to be pink slipped my 2nd day back. But I had a terrible manager who was harrassing me pretty badly and clearly wanted nothing to do with me, wihch ironically led to my mental state becoming worse lol)
As awful as this whole thing is, I do hope that you remember it as you go forward, because I know how nefarious mental health can be and how these things can sneak up on you. Also, I'm not sure how close you were with your coworkers, but there's nothing wrong with connecting with them on LinkedIn. Who knows, maybe one day you'll run into them again.
No. 1665368
>>1665199lol
nonny i have the same issue in my art discord. some overly loud condescender will always try to ruin innocent fun. i’m sure your art is lovely and more heartfelt than anything those losers can dredge up
No. 1665441
File: 1692111141267.png (15.45 KB, 540x480, tumblr_pdl0ptZeJa1tlgv32o3_128…)
This isn't really a vent but it didn't feel right putting this in the stupid questions thread. Earlier this year I got a refferal from my GP to see a psychologist. It was the student dean who recommended I'd go see my GP about how I felt and during those conversations I was crying non-stop and couldn't stop no matter how I tried because I felt that shit, it was really embarrassing. I was also crying a lot in private, had a tough time getting out of bed, a lot of anxiety, general poor outlook on life. So I got the refferal but was put on a waiting list and by time spring rolled around I felt better and cancelled and felt embarassed about even considering seeing a psychologist in the first place. The low self-confidence and general anxiety about things (not social) have been a constant for as long as I remember but I was feeling neutral rather than actively sad and angry, it was manageable. Now I'm again at a point where my anxiety and lack of self-confidence is actively interfering with my studies and making my life less enjoyable than I think it could be and I'm re-considering if I should go see a psychologist after all. I'm not on the verge of breaking down right now but I know it'll happen again sooner or later when I reach peak stress and anxiety. I'm sick and tired of this shit rollercoaster of feeling OK for a couple of months but the anxiety building until I break down again but at the same time I feel like my 'problems' aren't specific enough, too vague, not bad enough to bother a psychologist about. I don't want to show up at the intake conversation and come across as a whiny procastinating student. And how useful is going to a psychologist anyway when I KNOW my problems stem from a lack of self confidence/esteem, how is going to talk about that change anything? But I also just want to go through life feeling reasonably confident instead of having constant self-doubt gnawing at me. I have about 4 months left before my refferal expires so if I want to go afterall I should do it asap. I don't know what to do! Should I just do it and whatever happens, happens? Thoughts/experiences please.
No. 1665522
>>1664295My mom talked to him about everything while I was at work. He denied everything at first, but my mom said that I'm not a liar. He admitted it but said I was twisting his words, that I'm overreacting because I'm traumatized from my
abusive relationship, that he was just asking for help. My mom stood up for me and called bullshit. She wasn't going to kick him out until I came back from my trip but him and my sister decided to leave that night. My sister texted saying she still wants us to talk because she loves me but I'm still really hurt. I'm going to keep some distance for now and try and enjoy my trip. Thanks to all you ladies for seeing the situation for what it was and telling me so.
No. 1665623
>>1665522Nonita, this is the best news you could have brought us. I'm so happy your mother stood her ground. When you're heading back home, prepare yourself in case one or both of them shows up to try and talk to you. But for now, enjoy your trip. Make sure to thank your mom for having your back. I think you mentioned your mom being difficult sometimes, but I'm glad she's looking out for you.
Spend a little time with her to distract from your sister! Good luck!
No. 1665637
File: 1692125460912.jpeg (126.24 KB, 960x1020, 1692125412811.jpeg)
>"It's just fiction"
What they're based on are, in fact, very much real. I hate wherever these degenerates deliberately act obtuse to hide under a shit excuse, just to get off to children without being locked up in jail but then again, even those who abuse actual children don't get caught either, just like the two monsters who did that to me. No shit sherlock, they're indeed drawings, but drawings of what? Children, and you KNOW it! I swear each and every pedophile deserves worst torture known to the humankind. I'm sick of watching innocent shows, reading innocent novels, playing innocent games where a few characters happen to be kids and then having to see these fuckers going "muh loli, muh shota" why can't they just die. I'm not even trying to find them or dipping my hands into their pedo-pandering filth, they are just everywhere. Every fucking where.
No. 1665647
>>1665522I'm glad your mother called bullshit, based
>My sister texted saying she still wants us to talk Why is she so hellbent on making you interact with this creep? Something feels off with this whole situation tbh but they already left so eh, enjoy your trip don't sweat it
No. 1665668
>>1665522Hope your trip goes well and I hope your sister dumps her
abusive bf. Take care, try not to think about it during your trip and spend your time to relax
No. 1665718
File: 1692131398672.jpeg (51.61 KB, 643x733, A62C6AB0-5657-4F30-8079-3FF0C8…)
i dont understand why I have to be treated differently because of my race. i hate going online these days because my demographic is insulted unprovoked and nobody cares about us irl. there’s even twitter accounts dedicated to slandering us that have hundreds of thousands of followers but haven’t been taken down because Elon thinks hate speech is “political commentary”
No. 1665732
File: 1692132178787.jpg (164.95 KB, 2248x2236, alright i'll take my ass out a…)
i am so unbearably cringe i can feel people get second hand embarrassment through the screen and rightfully looking down on me. i read my posts back and i feel like dying from shame i always sound so retarded and i don't just mean that as stupid, i mean genuinely mentally delayed. i can't take it but i can't seem to stop either i'm so irritated with myself i can only imagine how others feel. people younger than me are leagues more (intellectually) advanced than i am and i am so behind, i'm so stunted, it's humiliating. i don't even feel envy i'm happy for them i just feel embarrassed for myself it's pitiful. i feel like i get even dumber and more embarrassing as i grow up i could swear i was a lot more mature and wise at fifteen than i am today. i really can't stand it i'm so disgusted with myself i feel sick and despite being acutely aware of this for years i only get worse at managing it let alone improving. i'm at a loss i just want to go away but here i am
No. 1665733
>>1665718>>1665726I don't know if I will ever experience racisim the same way you two do but I feel like I understand where you're coming from to a degree.
I have curly hair and am one of the only very VISUALLY mixed people in my area/racially ambiguious yet we are ethically diverse (indian, asian, white and black). Yet people usually ASSUME my ethnicity is their groups and will be racist towards other groups and try to get me to join in with them- and are very shocked when they discover I am a mix of (4+) cultural groups. I have had indians tell me they hate black people and I was lucky to be born with white skin- I've had white people tell me about how they hate latinos and their work is cheap, I've had asian friends call people who look like my father 'gangsters'. This is NOT racebait BTW, but it is extremely foreign to me that there are people who never experience racisim or bias ever.
I also always grew up being asked if I was adopted or "what are you" (yes at 22, grown adults ask me still). Very confusing.
No. 1665734
>>1665732Embrace your cringe
nonnie, once I did, life was much more fulfilling. Live your life for yourself and as long as you're enjoying yourself, I would not worry. I was quite cringe- and still am but I have accepted I am allowed to enjoy things.
No. 1665737
>>1665718I was feeling the exact same thing earlier today. I'm honestly tired of pretending I don't see it or that it doesn't hurt.
It feels like it's not even human beings saying these things, but I know it is. It's insane knowing that there are people who will always despise me and want me to die or kill myself just because of the race I was born, and that there's nothing I can ever do about it. They don't care that I'm a human being, or that none of the things they say apply to me. I don't care about having "clapbacks" for racists, I resent that my whole life has to either be spent on defense mode, or just taking constant abuse and blame for things other people did. And then other women will try to gaslight about it because they either don't know or don't care, since it doesn't concern them.
Sometimes, I really wish I could just change my race and be done with it.
No. 1665740
>>1665732Why's it so important that other people don't see you as cringe tho? There will always be people who look down on others (even if you act like a people pleasing doormat) but you should know that there's going to be an equal amount who think you are eloquent, funny, intelligent, cool, etc. the world is a big place. You might feel like you were more mature at 15 because you were mature for your age group but maturity kind of hits a peak around 20 ime and if you want to become more well read you can do that at any age. Don't give up
nonny.
No. 1665741
>>1665735>>1665738sorry for getting things mixed up nona, i reverse image searched your pic, got chinese sites as results and i thought you were talking about racist bias based on the countries' histories of doing bad stuff (not talking about the "bri'ish/frenchies/spaniards le ebil" type of jokes but actual threats and hatred) instead of historical dehumanization of the people of that race themselves. i don't go on twitter so i didn't know it was allowed once elon took over.
>>1665733imo it'd be nicer of them to ask "what's your heritage" (not in a rude "what are you" way like you've described) before deciding to hate on other races/ethnicities with you, not sure why they'd even need to express that to a random person they've just met though.
>>1665737this parallels a lot with hating being born female to me but unlike transgenderism, "transracial" is (thankfully) highly frowned upon.
especially the "constant abuse" and "life on defense mode" parts
No. 1665805
>>1665790Also even if they're not assholes, medical privacy isn't as sacred as people think it is. Depends on the area but in my country therapist notes can be viewed by:
>employers (you need to sign a release, but for these employers the release is a requirement so not really voluntary)>insurance (same as above, 'voluntary' mandatory release)>social workers and welfare system (same as above)>CPS/APS>justice system (even if you're the victim)>other medical professionals (good luck getting help for chest pain if you have an anxiety dx)Medical privacy only protects your information from random nobodies, there are loopholes for all the situations where privacy actually matters.
No. 1665818
>>1665817i’m trying to hard to be logical because no nut was inside me or anything but ive read some wild shit like “OH IF IT LEAKS THROUGH CLOTHES YOU CAN GET PREGNANT”
>>1665815but i’ve never had these symptoms before for pms, it’s so scary
No. 1665956
File: 1692152610342.jpg (12.91 KB, 320x314, 182900730_525300888879990_7681…)
>>1665874I'm bad at comforting so I don't really know what to say but anon, I really wish I could befriend you in real life. I could relate to your words so much, since I also feel like maybe I'm way too sensitive and I'm embarrassed by it sometimes. I'd rather be emotionless at this point, it feels like I can't live my life properly because my emotions are never in my control.
No. 1665981
File: 1692154788739.jpg (29.03 KB, 400x394, 844c657e1304f9d4b25a4a9f60f1dc…)
My brother tore up what is now considered a super rare Charizard card when we were little because he had a sore loser chimp out and I still remember it so vividly and the rage is still so real for me. I hate him for so many reasons but that was one of the very first.
No. 1666404
File: 1692207348063.jpg (68.5 KB, 384x500, D_NQ_NP_969825-MLB25509355858_…)
Can't take my obsession with fucking 70s willy wonka anymore i will fucking kill myself
No. 1666573
File: 1692216412908.jpg (28.09 KB, 533x534, tumblr_7bba3afa293c9d4df2076be…)
my stomach has been hurting for the past hour and i have no idea why. i didn't even eat anything funny but it hurts so much.