File: 1690493443670.png (598.08 KB, 1215x562, Capture.PNG)
No. 1646619
reposting my comment from last thread-
Anyone remembers when Nicki Minaj first came out/got big? I remember it because it was the first time a girl told me she was bisexual. I was in 7th grade and I was in a alternative school. I'm black and almost every school i went too was like majority black in a urban area. Very few white kids and most the kids I thought were just white, would often be Hispanic/Puerto Rican. We had a large India/Muslim population but it was majority black/hispanic. Anyway, so when this girl told me she was bisexual, I didn't care. Like it was so normal. I remember going to a bigger hs, and there were so many butch/tomboys who'd cross dress, some would hang with gangbangers (like this one Korean girl who dated every single feminine black bisexual/lesbian girl in the school it seemed like kek), or they hung with a bunch of feminine/popular girls. It was so normalize to be in class with a cross dressing girl, whose name was like, "Sierra".
We had very few openly gay dudes, but a lot of them were hispanic, the few black ones we had just hung with the girls.
It's very weird to me to think how, I'd go downtown and see adults making faces or talking shit about the butch/lesbian/bisexual girls from my school holding hands or just dressing how they dressed. Vs. so many of us just thinking it was normal from the jump. I didn't even grow up in a household where lesbian/gay shit was discussed/encouraged.
I often wonder if the butch/cross dressing girls were treated well at home, because in school it was pretty fucking normal to me, even the ones who hung out with Boys weren't treated poorly to my knowledge. I don't know why i'm thinking about this kek.
No. 1646721
>>1646702I will be fine, just sucks a little extra because he's the 1st person I've ever felt so close to and it will probably take me ages to find a replacement considering how big of an antisocial loner I am kek
I also reminded myself of all the red flags he had so honestly speaking, it won't be hard to find someone better than him.
No. 1646757
File: 1690504045257.jpg (15.25 KB, 1200x675, rage.jpg)
>Mom was a neglectful drug addict
>Cut off contact at 18, used to hate her now I understand she went through severe trauma. Don't excuse it, but I understand why she is the way she is.
>Don't love her either, just don't care. Went to therapy and accepted my childhood as it is and I'm at a stable place in my life
>Brother is older than me by 10+ years and took longer to cut off our mom, not until his early 30s
>Says she deserved to get beat by her 3rd husband, she's an evil cunt blah blah whenever he starts ranting about her randomly
>"We love her cause she's our mom but"
>Say I don't love her I just don't care
>Yeah you do! She's our mom
>Ok and, I don't love her. I love my husband, not her
>You love her sis, I know you do
I literally don't. I don't know why this manbaby faggot keeps projecting his mommy issues onto me. It's embarrassing that I'm significantly younger than him and yet I feel so more mature than him. Like I hit all these mental goals that you're supposed to when healing from trauma quicker than he did and I don't get it. I'm waiting for him to do this yet again so I can finally tell him to stop projecting his own feelings, I genuinely don't give a shit about her, and to get help for his mommy issues. Nothing pisses me off more than people thinking they know who I am, and try to speak for me. It's like after we "reunited" and really bonded after I was 18 he just desperately tries to keep projecting his own feelings onto me to justify the way he is.
He unironically befriended our mom's 3rd husband who beat her because he reached out and I guess he's desperate for any father figure (his dad left him and mine abused me). Then he couldn't comprehend why his wife told him NO when the ex husband offered to give them his old house. I had to tell him you retard he literally beat our mother why WOULDN'T she be uncomfortable, you want your wife around a wifebeater? And he was like oh..Now I get it. I straight up don't feel like his little sister wtf, I feel older than him because he's so fucking stupid sometimes.
No. 1646763
File: 1690504432286.gif (2.64 MB, 640x640, mad-monkey.gif)
>mfw he invites himself to my house to cook dinner together for the third meeting
Maybe I'm just a bitch but I find that presumptuous. I dunno
No. 1646769
>>1646763Ew, he invited
himself to your house? Has he been over before? Not bitch at all, that's pretty weird.
No. 1646804
File: 1690506453361.jpeg (365.74 KB, 1242x1242, 86AD1E90-4D07-4E81-A2F4-401DBF…)
Would it kill everyone in my family not constantly lecturing me 24/7 whenever anyone else commits a mistake? This is why I never tell them anything or ask for anyone for their help, because in the end I will be the one getting a whole hour lecture about why something I did was wrong, then it will turn into a joke because “haha, remember that time you did something wrong and asked for help? That was so funny lol”.
I love my family, but my aunt is driving me nuts because she’s mad at my parents and my brother for the decisions they make.
I wasn’t the one who told my brother to get a girlfriend, I was never asked if I wanted a fancy water filter at home so it could filter all of the water of the house, I was never told to choose from a type of water tank or another, I was never asked for my input on a huge amount of decisions that my brother and my parents makes. Then why am I the one getting lectured? I don’t get it, it’s tiresome because while I like to know what’s going on at home, my aunt repeats the same things over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. Was that annoying to read? Imagine listening to the same subject all of the time, I’ve memorized al that she says, and she’s right, and I support her, but gosh I get tired of listening to the same argument all of the time.
No. 1646874
>>1646739there is only one option, they must
sexily fight to the death of one.
No. 1646950
I saw a young girl crossing the street with her mother today, the girl was maybe 10? Not sure, I’m pretty bad at guessing ages. Regardless she was very young, noticeably young. Short, small build, still at an age where her head was disproportionate to her body, there would be no world in which you would mistake this child for even a young teen. She was a baby
She had on pants and a white tank top that was twisted up into a knot to show like half of her stomach. Super inappropriate for her age but i’m not this child’s mother. She’s holding her mom’s hand as she’s crossing the crosswalk and all of a sudden her other free hand starts frantically trying to pull her shirt down to cover herself. She’s like tugging at it uncomfortably trying to cover her stomach. I think it’s weird but like immediately I just knew, and when I look up there’s a white truck sitting at the cross walk waiting to pull out
I drive by it as I turn in and it’s a man old enough to be balding fucking breaking his neck to turn and look at this girl as they get further away from his truck going the opposite direction. Like he was full on body turned, neck twisted, grabbing the seat for leverage gawking at this CHILD. This is not “uhhhh uhhh I thought she was 16” this is a baby, unmistakably so.
I got so mad that I started tearing up because of how blatant it was, how confident this man feels to perv on a child like that, to make her feel so uncomfortable in her own body just walking down the street with her mother. I wanted to stop the car, throw something through his window, scream, cuss, anything. It wouldn’t have done any good though. I’ve been angry ever since. I’m starting to hate and distrust men to a scary degree.
I hate I can’t do anything. I hate that so many little girls are going to end up in the same situation I was end. Forever fucked up because some degenerate subhuman man put his pleasure above the rights and safety and well being of child. He didn’t technically do anything illegal but the way he was looking at her in my opinion is a sign he’s too dangerous ti he around children. Men like that it’s only a matter of time before they try. He shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near them
No. 1646966
typing this here bc i have no one to vent about this lol. i’ve been taking phlebotomy classes and i have been paying attention to the classes, making sure i have proper technique and don’t hurt anyone etc. my partners have been great too, they were all good at what they were doing and clearly paying attention to class. But this week i got paired with a girl that always sits at the back and never pays attention, and she hurt me like, really bad. She stuck the needle before letting the alcohol dry, the tourniquet was too tight and was on for too long, she broke the capillary blood sample tube while sealing it, the blood splattered on my face and clothes and pieces of glass was everywhere. It was such an unpleasant experience. I was in such discomfort but then she started crying after failing at literally every step so everyone was consoling her, asking her if she’s ok like i wasn’t sitting there, already bruising, blood all over my clothes, and she didn’t even give me gauze so my finger was bleeding all over the place. Why would such person pursue a career in medicine anyway? If you are not going to even bother paying attention in class or care about your patient’s well being, why bother? Go work at a burger king then. Do you think sticking needles to people is a fucking joke? You put me through so much pain for nothing. So annoying
No. 1647030
File: 1690520207763.jpeg (48.52 KB, 420x294, IMG_8670.jpeg)
>bday dinner (one day late cuz work) was delicious
>carbs and southern food galore
>biscuits, grits, holy fucking macaroni and cheese
>one alcoholic drink thinking it won't kill me
>oops I consoomed too much
>get home and bloat is unreal
>drinking water does not help
>take walk to counteract the dough knot in my stomach m
>only worsen the discomfort and almost vomit and defecate myself by walking too fast
my gastro issues have me tempted to punch walls
No. 1647037
>>1647030Picrel is literally me.
Also you should probably see a good doctor for that. Went to one once for my gastro issues and he gave me drinkable bacteria to fix the balance of bacteria in my guts and it did help, and he told me to eat probiotic foods like pickles and greek yogurt and later on introduce more onion and garlic into my diet. It did help a lot. Avoiding unhealthy foods or foods that irritate my digestive system as much as possible also helped. But I still have another issue of parasites but that's another can of worms (pun intended)
No. 1647040
>>1647037I'd cry about having to change my diet if that was anyone's recommendation (it's not the best, but it does taste good)
also what the fuck does drinkable bacteria taste like
No. 1647042
>>1647030I’m sorry
nonny, tummy troubles suck, but I hope you had the happiest of birthdays
No. 1647201
>>1647170Whenever a man there tries to argue with me I tell them they're too old, will never be loved and that it's over for them because they're genetic dead ends. You can never truly lose an argument against a man who's in his 40s and still wastes his time watching anime shit anf fantasizing about the perfect girl who will come and fix his life. All of them are already severely fucked.
Don't argue with them seriously.
No. 1647252
File: 1690546555585.jpg (27.84 KB, 720x488, 1685661619798.jpg)
I hate dating profiles that are full of hot selfies but nothing actually about themsleves or it's just generic shit like music is my passion, I like to go to the gym, coffee is my life. Like damn, give me something to work with. Boring normies are the worst, I'm boring too but at least I know I'm boring and make an attempt to give something you can start a conversation about.
No. 1647366
File: 1690561388121.jpg (806.12 KB, 3667x1305, Notes_230728_111658_159.jpg)
This is Mrs. West. She was my first grade teacher. I can't find her first name anywhere, and boy are my arms tired!
Mrs. West of, what was now formerly, Pick Elementary school was extremely integral in making me the person I am today; so that's why I'm trying so hard to find her.
You see; Mrs. West used to not only allow and watch me be sexually violated, she also encouraged it and covered it up.
When I would tell her or my mother or the principal what he did to me, she told me it was my fault for not trying hard enough to get away, and she would punish me. So would punish me by making the other children hate me. She would also tell the principal and my mother that I was lying and she would never permit anything like that.
Well, there's a hole lot more heinous she did than that.
She was a teacher for over 20 years.
If you recognize this rancid fucking heifer, and wanna do some stranger the biggest favor of her life; just give me her name.
No. 1647367
File: 1690561657044.jpeg (58.18 KB, 750x1115, c62ae74b-5d59-4cc3-896f-8bacb8…)
Why is it always something that tastes REALLY REALLY good that gives me diarrhea? Like wtf at least taste like you was cooked in hell's cauldron.
No. 1647376
>>1647368The school doesn't exist anymore, and I've beed in contact with the schoolboard for years now. They will not tell me.
Btw, very telling that your mind jumped to violence rather than court, "ma'am."
But none of that really matters because this is the vent thread and it's not about you, you vain cunt.
No. 1647382
>>1647378I've tried eleven different therapists and four different psychiatrists.
I do not feel better.
There are other children that she hurt before
and after me.
What if she still works in childcare now? She couldn't possibly have been older than 55 at the most, she could very well still be torturing children.
I
must find her.
No. 1647397
>>1647391Oh no, you're right, women should only get angry in a prim and proper way, we should never imply we wish ill upon people who harm us!
Fuck you. Eat shit.
Don't be surprised when you try to dunk on someone who's fucking actively upset because of child rape and they don't flip over and show you their belly.
Moid. If not a moid, a disgrace.
You don't fucking tell me how to fucking express my rage in the thread designated for expressing rage.
Again, eat shit.
No. 1647406
>>1647393Yeah, you right, I'm a
female so I shouldn't express anger above like, crying anfld hoping Father takes care of it for me.
Please, go on, tell me how I'm
supposed to vent about being fucking sexually violated as a child, please help me to understand why other women find it more important that I don't "act foolish" than, you know, vent in the vent thread with words not actions.
>>1647394>>1647400jfc, thank you, can't fucking imagine why no one wants to try to deal with this and when you do, you get run through so many hoops, you lose your fucking mind, and then people blame you for being crazy
No. 1647420
>>1647391Reddit or 4chan is a better place to vent with no interaction? Lmao. She got a Reddit response already with the “go to therapy” comment and then she got a 4chan tier response by essentially getting told to calm down talking about her rape.
Definitely feeling the moid influx too lately, it’s like a lot of men are suddenly discovering this site
No. 1647447
>>1647444I literally never said I intend to cause her physical harm, you absolute psycho.
To wish ill upon another person can mean anything from stubbing their toe to being decapitated by an elephant to going to prison for the rest of their life.
You literally are the only one talking about violence. I think it's super fucking creepy you're this concerned with policing how some random literallywho is pissed off about getting raped.
Maybe shut up.
No. 1647455
>>1647448>>1647452I don't even want a witch hunt, I just want her name
there's a chance someone else here was abused by her too, I figure if I ended up here because of all of that, 20+ years worth of other women after me, somebody else might remember
No. 1647458
>>1647454You're right and you're right to say it, I'll never try to find my abuser again, I'll just cross my fingers that she decides to stop harming children. Thanks anon! You really helped!
Eat. Shit.
No. 1647476
>>1647467Please stop taking this moid's bait, he is literally ignoring every single point made by anyone responding to him, and is blatantly mocking us by saying we're trusting his words after he just word-diarrhead a complete lie that anybody in the thread had suggested violence before he did
Mods are asleep, ignore moids
No. 1647495
>>1647455Sorry nonna I wasn’t trying to say you were, just that asshole McGee could’ve left it at that and stfu but instead decided they needed to cape for a predator for some deluded reason.
Hope you get the justice you seek.
No. 1647507
File: 1690568840842.jpg (132.07 KB, 478x360, a.e..jpg)
i cant afford to pay my mother rent and im in college fulltime and my job is really stressful for a pay that isnt worth it…our hours have also been cut and i also have bills coming out and my boyfriends mother fucked over their living situation and cant afford to pay their cars. he does have a job and is in college as well but im heavily considering picking up waitressing and working a bunch to try to help him and myself out…im just worried because i get very anxious and dont do well working with customers but the money is good and im wondering if my fight or flight could force me to suck it up and just fake it. ugh i wish i was a fucking tranny so i could ebeg. i was trying to focus on my final assignments right now but in a little bit i need to start looking into some ways to make money asap :( im so worried nonnies ahhh fuckfuckfuckfuck(:()
No. 1647550
File: 1690571230644.jpg (9.72 KB, 275x146, 1655740929685.jpg)
Goddamn it I hate being autistic and ADHD I hate not being able to relate to people I hate having to contort my face into expressions that aren't natural just so people won't think I'm a bitch but I'm also afraid of emoting naturally because people think I'm weird or judge me for getting overly excited or laughing at things that don't make sense to normies. I just want to exist without having to put on a fake face, I want to be genuinely nice to people but they just take advantage of me because I'm naive or I want to trust people but they disappoint me. I wish people would be nice to me but they can tell I'm a sperg within 1 millisecond of seeing my face for some reason, sometimes I wish I had a physical disability instead at least then people would be universally considered shitty people, instead of making fun of retarded or socially awkward people because they think we can control it. I cry almost every day when I think about how fucking hard it is to exist around people that don't care about me or think less of me. I can't just do shitty small talk even though I try because they see right through me. I'm a shut in with very little social contact even going to the cafe to get a drink I can tell I don't belong there, I don't deserve to exist amongst people, just because I don't follow the same social contract and social mannerisms and I don't dress feminine I either stick out like a sore thumb or I'm completely invisible. I really just want to die I have no connections no hope for my future no support group, my family gives the most shallow superficial 'just bee yourself' advice, meanwhile my normie sister used to make fun of me constantly and that was just a reflection of how every other person treats me, especially people near my age. I only exist by coping with my sad existence trying to regulate my nerves because I'm mostly on edge if I think about my reality too much, I use escapism and used to use drugs and alcohol but I was too afraid of the health consequence, now I'm just addicted to the internet and browse it constantly to try and avoid the negative thoughts. I should write this in a diary but it is cathartic to write here, even if I get made fun of or if this post is completely ignored, at least I wrote and posted it, I don't want to be a ghost I want someone to know I exist and I have feelings and I'm tired of pretending I don't need human connection
No. 1647588
File: 1690573779885.png (Spoiler Image,137.2 KB, 2374x1176, screenshot.png)
>>1647366Nonna, I think her name is
Candice. Pic is a cap of the Pick Elem. school website on wayback. I hope this is her and that this helps you out somehow!
No. 1647677
>>1647671samefagging, women are not men, we don't end up on the news because we don't do physical violence
One of the posts literally says something about taking it to court
No. 1647705
>>1647691you sound like a great friend. I'm sure she will miss you too very much.
>>1647690happy birthday
nonnie, hope you do what you want and have a great time doing it-don't feel pressured, it's YOUR birthday and no one elses. as long as you're enjoying yourself!
No. 1647902
>>1647901>mourning the loss of a pet at the hands of a pitbull.lol where
Typical psycho behaviour, using some sob story as an excuse to be an unhinged psycopath
No. 1647933
File: 1690606742519.jpeg (97.28 KB, 896x884, 086915CE-C259-4FEA-A2CC-9EBE17…)
when i was 15 and thought i was sooo different from my peers, i knew to some degree it was just silly adolescent egocentrism. yet here i am 7 years later and i still don't know what the fuck my fellow zoom zooms are talking about because i was a shut in for 4 years with little social media before i got my most recent job. my favourite coworker is sweet but a fag hag and always going on about drag scene despite being a straight girl. everyone references tiktok videos and how mentally ill they are and fuck the system (but not doing anything about it to any degree). spend 35 dollars on a lunch but then complain they're poor and they can't cook because groceries are too expensive. wtf happened? is generation z genuinely a deeply fucked up well of incompetency and trauma or is this all a grift for attention because being autistic is the new fad of the year? a little of both?
and don't get me started on asking people off the bat their pronouns and pronoun policing.
i am so tired.
No. 1647949
>>1647941memes are brought up a lot. but moreso i just hear "oh let me show you this tiktok" or "do you know that one tiktok where…" i truly don't understand it. i want to talk about life and music and art and DOING shit. i dont want to be sucked into that hellish app with its algorithms that have perfected fucking up memory spans and encouraging self consciousness and extremist lunacy.
we'll be feeling the psychological effects of the lockdowns for a long time.
No. 1647955
File: 1690610009894.jpg (74.77 KB, 700x859, ♡︎ (1).jpg)
Why don't cute (but not too handsome) men with the humor and personality of a ugly guy exist? It's like the ugly guys, ime, have to develop more personality because they can't rely on looks. Then I end up becoming attracted to them anyway (especially if they have confidence despite being fug) because I like men who can make me laugh. And now I feel like my type is ugly men but it's not. And then the ugly guys who can't develop personality just become incels. We need to start telling attractive men that they're ugly so they're forced to have to get a personality.
No. 1647989
File: 1690616986555.jpeg (305.75 KB, 1279x1258, IMG_5423.jpeg)
just found out bodyvisualizer.com doesn’t let you look at underweight bmi’s anymore and i am literally moments away from punching a hole through the drywall
are you FUCKING KIDDING ME
like i just want some vague fucking idea of what my fucking body looks like and they really said wow that’s too bad loser
what kind of ana fucking snowflakes contacted these bitches to say “actually ummmmmmm ur body visualizer let me imagine my obese fucking self as an individual of human weight and that’s too triggering”
i literally have no concept of what my garbage body looks like anymore and i try to get some outside perspective and they fucking nanny state my ass, i’m frothing at the fucking mouth
i am truly not even trying to rattle my bullshit bones, i’m just so upset that the internet has become even more worthless as a result of useless retards
if you’re not going to model underweight bmi’s on the basis of ~health~ then you shouldn’t model obese bmi’s either, very fucking simple, but clearly some braindead anachans threw a loud enough temper tantrum to eliminate one of the only things that let me combat my BDD
i am ready to start biting
No. 1647991
File: 1690617386093.png (1.56 MB, 1124x1124, oh no why dog.png)
I skimmed through the "cow yourself" thread since someone had bumped it and jesus christ what an userbase we host here, I no longer wonder about the schizos since we have nonnies writing an open essay about being a drug-addicted mentally unstable BPD-chan obsessed with stalking and provoking people to make up for their insecurities like it was a quirky character bio. Helped me to put a lot of posts here into perspective.
No. 1647996
>>1647955i feel this so aggressively
my “type” has historically been ugly fucking losers and i didn’t realize until recently that i just like funny dudes
my current bf is so kind and smart and considerate and Crazy Hot but truly one of the least funny people i know and it’s torturous to consider that he has just always been too hot to have to actually be funny
No. 1648001
>>1647993that’s what i’m fucking saying man, like even fully ignoring mentally ill trash cans like me it just feels totally pointless
why even have a body visualizer if it won’t show you the human body in a particular condition that isn’t normal weight to morbidly obese
at that point you just have a target stock photo generator
No. 1648006
>>1648001>>1647989You sound like one of the mentally ill anachans that'd benefit from not being able to see the underweight bodies so you couldn't
trigger yourself further.
Let me tell you how you look though, you look very bad and your organs look even worse because you're starving them. Your limbs are small but your stomach stands out, your face is sunken in and lifeless. You look ill because that's what you are and you deserve treatment. Your hair has fallen out, your eyes are sunken in, your body doesn't look model-esque as you lack the care they receive to "pretend to look" healthy, you just look like an older ill woman.
Once I gained weight I looked at old photos of mine where I was severely underweight with disgust. You'll do so as well.
No. 1648007
>>1648003>>1648006i am actively in therapy you absolute smoothbrains, i am in recovery, i beg of you to think outside of yourselves for once in your miserable lives
i’m not even underweight enough to be this ghoulish caricature you’re projecting, i am literally five fucking pounds underweight and that is apparently Not Acceptable according to this website that i was at least able to use to get an idea of what my fully imperceptible body looks like
No. 1648045
File: 1690625964197.webm (6.77 MB, 576x1024, tonidrivera_20230717_reel_3148…)
I hate living on the same planet as men so fucking much. This is so creepy, weird and terrifying.
No. 1648086
File: 1690630775299.gif (2.04 MB, 640x510, cat-wet.gif)
I'm almost 30 and it's made me reflect on what a loser I am. From an early age I struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts and just now decided I want to live. I'm so behind everyone, my peers are buying houses and cars and have careers. The length of the depression probably permanently stunted my brain so I have poor memory and find it hard to learn new things. I didn't go to college or save money or really try in life because I figured I was going to off myself anyway. I have no skills other than art and I'm not even that good at it. I like my job and it allows me flexibility to sell my art on the side but it's a dead-end job and I can't stay here forever, but at the same time I'm scared to waste what limited time and money I have on trying to get a career I could potentially end up hating. The clock is ticking. Soon I'll wake up at be 40 with nothing accomplished.
No. 1648137
>>1648127It's only natural that the ~blackpills~ on this site routinely calling women whores are just cuckquean pickmes and 4ever alone hikkis both without any female contacts in their lives but it's still pretty jarring for them to admit it.
Anyway it's really an eyeopener to see what kind of broken minds post on this site. Anons who dropped out of school and went on a drug binge being doormats to their discord daddies and male orbiters seething about other women nonstop. I'll never take another post seriously again.
No. 1648205
>>1648202Samefag, Laying anons. There was no
>>1648127 type of post in there. Why you lyin
No. 1648238
>>1647991I shouldn't be surprised when this site is specifically made to observe, stalk, and rant on other mentally ill people. Only other mentally ill people would find joy in a hobby like that. This site is a negativity magnet so of course it attracts unhinged hateful people. Misery loves company after all.
Also there was another 30+ yr old anon who was stalking another anon from here and making fun of her nudes with her nigel. That's the kind of sad and pathetic psychopaths we have on here.
No. 1648295
>>1648287>Doesn't it end up smelling like BO everywhere due to sweatNo?? What the fuck? Take a shower, for the love of god.
>How do people not sweat off their makeup?Honestly, I only know one woman who wears full face makeup. The rest use only eyeliner and lipstick. I've never seen them sweat it off.
>75That's 23°C. Not even close to hot weather, and many people would wear an extra layer like a long-sleeved shirt or a hoodie. Maybe your region has very high humidity?
No. 1648299
File: 1690654321024.jpg (86.71 KB, 620x360, ted.jpg)
>search something on google images
>at least 1/3 of the results are AI generated
No. 1648305
>>1648287I don't know about the mediterraneans for example but I live in a mild climate, our summers are cool to warm not hot so we don't need AC here. Or at least didn't use to until the extreme heatwaves and droughts from recent years but still, it's been like 20 degrees and under and rainy for over 2 weeks now which is nothing out of the ordinary for our summers.
>>1648295Nta but that really depends on what you're used to, isn't it? 23 degrees is definitely not wear-an-extra-layer-weather here.
>>1648298Where is that? Like general area of (presumably) Europe if you don't want to be country-specific.
No. 1648318
>>1648287people will stink of cheap perfume or deodorant, sweat most likely not. The architecture isn't better for temperature regulation here in my country, we build houses to keep the heat inside in the winter, no one was thinking about long, hot summers with nights that won't cool down. I have around 25°C in my flat for weeks now, even though it is below that temperature outside, my flat just won't get any colder and I hate it.
>>164829523°C indoors is hot and it's very uncomfortable when the humidity is high, at least for me. I can't sleep or think straight having these temperatures in my room. But I will wear a t-shirt while it's freezing outside and the best room temperature for me ist around 17°C. It's just what you are used to and where you grew up and I can't stand heat or sunshine, while I enjoy rain and snow.
No. 1648332
i get impatient and annoyed with books way too quickly. if it doesn't catch my interest within the first 5-10 pages, i immediately drop the book. unfortunately a lot of books have a slow start and don't draw you in immediately and i used to be able to deal with that… but it has gotten way worse in the last few months. i also get sooo picky with books - i hate moid writers and coomerish language/characterization, i hate tiktok hype books, i hate romance if it's the primary and only genre of the book, i hate queer/trans stuff, i hate 99% of all YA books. i like suspense and thrillers, but a lot of them contain cheap resolutions, include too much about the investigator's private life, or have to contain dumb sex scenes every few pages so everyone knows it's a book for adults. i like dark stuff about demons, hauntings and witchcraft, but a lot of it boils down to "femc has magic in her veins and graveyard soil between her toes." it doesn't help that most bookstores only have mainstream trash. my local library only has old stuff and caters mostly to YA loving tiktok addicted teens, bored housewives, and old men with hobbies such as trains or gardening. my tastes aren't highbrow by any means, but god, is today's book market really as shitty as i perceive it to be?
this post is brought to you by me giving an ali hazelwood book a try, thinking that it was alright-ish enough to read, and then slamming it shut because she's soooo tiny and petite, and she also has blue hair and septum ring.
No. 1648364
File: 1690660061881.jpg (46.91 KB, 500x667, Cats Who Just Wish You Would K…)
I realized I've never been interested enough in the Cow Yourself thread to actually read it, so I opened it up thinking there would be some funny stuff in there and there was…anons saying they groomed a 15 year old.
No. 1648369
File: 1690660433531.gif (1.99 MB, 1080x1080, zoomies.gif)
Anons! I ate chocolate and now I'm going crazy!! I'm walking circles around the house, my heart is beating so fast and I feel so dizzy! What's going on?! Aaaaaaaah
No. 1648409
File: 1690663196579.jpg (71.53 KB, 564x563, sick of it.jpg)
I'm starting to remember why I hate certain anons again. You see it'd be one thing if you simply found some piece of shit attractive and nothing more beyond that, but constantly out right denying the things he's done and defending his actions while saying disgusting shit about a young girl is bordering on scrote-tier. I want to a-log so bad. Maybe this is my start in growing out of celebrity crushes, because seeing some of the shit fans say about victims of those celebrity men (and in some cases their wives/girlfriends) is making me homicidal. This is why so many victims don't want to speak up in the first place.
No. 1648412
>>1648400They're alcoholics or at least "problem drinkers", you should avoid them. Also they're stupid. Driving drunk is unacceptable. A person could have one single drink and still drive but anything more is reckless and gets more reckless with every drink. Don't go anywhere with them where you are reliant on them for transportation.
In some areas driving drunk is culturally acceptable but it's really not okay, people just start to think it's normal (Pittsburgh PA for example lol). You do NOT have to go along with it.
No. 1648418
>>1648400For normal visit days and birthdays that seems too much, and they should have rented a room or stayed somewhere nearby for the wedding.
I went to a party for a relative’s side of the family once and it freaked me out when I found out everyone there was expected to get wasted and just sleep over at the house (including me), acting like it was a totally normal party thing, I left early and never met up with them again.
No. 1648425
File: 1690664696510.jpeg (47.15 KB, 750x744, d;kkfd.jpeg)
I hate Pinterest so much. I have had an account with them for so long and recently they suspended me for "posting spam" which is BS because I have never. I have appealed to their stupid robot help center everyday for more than a week. Today I got a "decided not to reactivate" email and it was like a knife to my chest. I heard that if people are persistent, they can get past even that, but it's still heartbreaking for me. I had a lot of boards for my creative outlets and fandoms, and losing them hurts. All of my references, tips, and my beautiful memes. I could do it old-school and save the images on a hard drive but it would take up so much space so quickly! I don't know a good substitute to Pinterest… and recreating my boards is daunting because I had many curated folders and ~7,000 pins. Pinterest is garbage, but there really isn't a good replacement/competitor out there. It's trivial but I wanna cry every time I think about my lost account.
No. 1648487
File: 1690668986148.jpeg (36.99 KB, 348x324, IMG_8628.jpeg)
>go to see barbie with narc mom
>she keeps bringing up parts of childhood I don't care for
>try and deflect it by bringing up barbies in a happy context
>instead brings up how she basically forced me and sis towards giving away our toys during the family debt and divorce era
>then blames me and my sister for us not keeping our toys because I told her very passively it's sad we don't have 99% of them
>bitch you wanted us to sell them in a fucking estate and garage sale and to consignment for bottom dollar because you were a shitty parent who accrued so much debt
>you really took your daughters childhoods away in general by being a fucking psycho bitch who abused her in the first place
>and god forbid she bring something nice up about it and all you can bring up is how you ruined it
>in the context of you appointing yourself the savior
>enjoy barbie but have thought cooking at the back of my mind that being around her is never without fucking apprehension
>why can I not just enjoy the pink silly movie
No. 1648626
>>1648599I thought some of the ezrafags were more self aware than that. If you're going to like the guy's work and looks, can't you at least admit he's scum? That his personal life is scum? That much is undeniable.
Does it not register to some of these people at all how often indigenous girls and women are targeted either?
No. 1648639
>>1648615We're going backwards. If they're conventionally attractive or white enough it's like they can weasel away from anything. Drives me crazy. Even the Depp Heard trial threads on here could be complete shitshows in what thought to be a mostly a safe place to take the woman's side. I still see so much online discourse pushing the both sides narrative like the twenty some woman truly held the power in that situation. She lost her whole twenties to that freak and then he spent years more trying to bleed her dry with litigation.
Rich, famous men know what they're doing "dating", using, abusing and disposing of all these women like rags. especially if they're already
victims of childhood or industry abuse, and then they erupt trying to silence them when they fight back in any capacity. Or if they just vent about it and don't say the man's name. Why does the blame always rest on the woman, though?
No. 1648640
File: 1690685078552.jpg (164.26 KB, 2000x1000, RwSySrs.jpg)
>>1648620nonnie those are clearly women attracted to ezra who think the women he abused aren't pretty enough to deserve his attention. he goes out of his way to date non-celeb women the closests he got to a celeb was mia solange who is an ig model.
Growing up is realizing that most women would screw over other women for a man they like, most people are cowards saying this as a SA survivor
No. 1648648
File: 1690685511946.jpg (39.77 KB, 492x534, tumblr_be2008b64b046330b9b75f9…)
MY FUCKING MENSTRUAL CUP. came OUT. when i was taking a SHIT. at my boyfriend's PARENTS HOUSE. and i had to REACH IN. TO THE TOILET. TO TAKE IT OUT.
AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
No. 1648654
>>1648644Weinstein's ogre appearance was pretty much the only reason people believed his
victims at greater face value. He also was behind the camera. Two papers and multiple journalists were also working on his story at the same time by coincidence which means it actually stood a chance of breaking. When has the same amount of investigation ever been extended to another famous sex offender besides maybe Cosby or R. Kelly, and why are so few of the offenders who are actually punished white men?
It's the pretty people in front of it: the charmers, the movie stars, the nostalgia acts, the quirky, the handsome, who need to be put under microscopes and watched. The straightest, whitest, and privileged men.
The higher the listing and the more popular they are, or were, in the cast of falling, fading, weekend at bernies looking corpses like depp, the likelier they are to be a chauvinistic pig. And the more they lean into a soft, artful image and insist how much they love and appreciate women, the more suspect one should be
No. 1648659
File: 1690686548141.jpeg (512.41 KB, 1028x1500, dfsjdfj;s.jpeg)
>>1648648Oh my god
nonnie rip, I'll pray tonight to our girl Mary for your spiritual cleansing and healed emotional trauma
No. 1648665
File: 1690687225400.jpg (244.17 KB, 960x720, NINTCHDBPICT000560153423-2.jpg)
>>1648654The description of his penis is making it click why I've seen transman conspiracy jokes about him for the first time OMG. This is wild
No. 1648670
File: 1690687454495.jpg (233.13 KB, 959x714, NINTCHDBPICT000560257270.jpg)
>>1648665The repetition of illustrating the photos was a CHOICE kek
No. 1648678
File: 1690688647193.jpeg (872.2 KB, 1600x1200, IMG_8817.jpeg)
>>1648665>>1648670Give the court artists from his trials a raise
No. 1648730
>>1648711Lol, I've asked myself that a lot but I'm pretty sure I'm straight. I think I just really hate the idea of public affection. Obviously I shouldn't care if other people enjoy it and do it, but I think whenever I see straight couples specifically and the guy is being overly physically affectionate I get grossed out because I imagine that the girl must be feeling really patronized and objectified because that's how I'd feel (even though I'm sure if they're dating she's fine with it). And then I spiral and it makes me sad because your boyfriend randomly kissing you in public or putting his arm around your waist should be a sweet form of showing affection, but it would make me uncomfortable at best. I always spiral whenever this happens and feel unlovable lol. Like who would want to date someone like me?
your protectiveness of women is cute though lol. your favorite celebrity deserves better than to be dragged around by some moid…>>1648712I am. I wish I was normal and could see a picture like that and think "aw cute, wish that was me" or something along those lines.
No. 1648732
File: 1690692504417.jpg (91.26 KB, 456x810, tumblr_bbbd13c18ec3c9bc58dbfa0…)
Just had to frog a project I was working on for like 2 hours cause I realized I wouldn't have enough yarn. Uuuugh. I'm about to start again with a different yarn. On the brightside, frogging it with my yarn winder was very satisfying.
No. 1648765
>>1648654tbf weinstein got caught because he was no longer deniable. there's a sea of offputting corporate men who will never get visibility. it's less about pretty privelage and more about people believing stereotypes about rape only happening in back alleys by strangers. when it's coworkers, boyfriends, husbands etc. people refuse to accept the domesticity which makes it easier to for rapist to
victim blame or gaslight
victims into denying rape
No. 1648782
File: 1690697293082.jpg (56.68 KB, 1024x551, 3.jpg)
I have lost the ability to talk to others. My social skills have eroded so much over the years. I talk to two people from time to time out of obligation and my mom, that's pretty much it. I would like to make friends but at the same time it feels impossible. I feel so alienated from everyone.
No. 1648796
>>1648620>so fucking dumb they think rape or abuse is about attraction and not psychopathyabsolutely.
>>1648599>>1648615it pissed me off too. i even debated this with an admittedly moid friend earlier this year. these people are willfully being fucking stupid.
abusive men who want to kidnap and/or rape/abuse a woman do not typically go for the girl they find the most attractive, it's about having the opportunity and the vulnerability of the target. they get off on the power/abuse/control itself. apparently idiots cannot get that through their thick skulls.
No. 1648802
File: 1690699211492.jpeg (110.35 KB, 828x802, 2CF4841C-A0F5-486E-A779-AEB05C…)
The “dog pill” meme makes me sick to my stomach. Men literally parrot it every time some white woman is photographed petting her dog or whatever. It’s just a joke to them! Fucking bestiality is just a stupid sexy sex porn sex fuck joke to them. Not to mention that a large majority of bestiality porn is forced sex by human male producers satisfying their fetishes. These men are memeing a terrifying rape porn genre just because it’s le funny.
Few things on the internet will make me feel as insanely frenzied and violent towards the OP/commenter than dog pill stuff. It makes me feel absolutely deranged with total annihilation anger thinking about how hard men project THEIR deviant sexuality on women. I don’t know how these subhumans even wake up in the morning knowing that they are one porn search away from being a committed zoophile or pedo or necrophiliac or whatever. My hate overtakes me. I could not a-log these genetic failures enough, but the end they deserve is certainly coming to them.
And the worst part? My disgust as well as the disgust of other women gives the “joke” life. I can’t ignore it - then it goes unchallenged. I can’t engage with it - then I’m automatically a white girl who is denying her “attraction.” You can’t joke back because you get gore sent to you if you make a joke saying that men are actually the quote unquote dog pilled gender and are actually typically into much worse. I’ve seen more dead bodies in my DMs in a single year of QTing failmales than I did in my entire life on the internet before that.
I wish I could go back in time and stop it from being created. I can’t, sadly. So now, every time I see a post online about men’s mental health or men’s rights, I immediately think about the dog pill and Ian Watkins and any sympathy I would feel is removed from my mind. It sucks that these people are just allowed to have everyday jobs just like you and me, you could be in your local bodega behind some dog pill moid scanning his EBT card and you wouldn’t even know. It doesn’t matter who they are. It doesn’t matter what they do. They don’t deserve to be within 15 miles of any woman (or dog, or animal, or corpse, or child……). Until we have a way to guarantee that……. i can’t take this anymore nonacitas women only planet when
No. 1648811
>>1648776i love dogs, don't particularly like children (low tolerance meter, can only be around them so long), and i dislike shitbulls, i'm tired of the pitbull defenses. if some breeds were bred to have particular traits and we can see that, why do so many people sperg that pitbulls are "just misunderstood uwu". i know several people that do work with dogs and they decline any work with pitbulls.
>>1648802based. im sick of seeing this too. it's connected to the "women can't purely love" meme they like to push (obviously just projection), they're convinced a woman being fond of dogs means she's some kind of sick pervert when really they're sitting on 4fagz every day and deathgripping to porn so every single thing they perceive with their warped mind is pornified.
No. 1648823
>>1648659You're an angel nona thank you…
>>1648802I always thought I was being irrational or overly sensitive about those "jokes", I'm glad to see I was actually being normal. That shit is so fucking disgusting. I knew a guy who I'm 99% sure actually liked that shit. He showed me a split second of a video of it once to get a reaction out of me. I hope he's a rotten bloated corpse by now.
No. 1648901
File: 1690706462854.jpg (70.83 KB, 563x558, 93825732647.jpg)
>Like doing a hobby
>Remain pretty mediocre in it
>People give me pats on the back and support my efforts
>Get inspired and work really hard to improve, gradually get better, become actually good
>People aren't interested in supporting anymore and they start ignoring your efforts
>Get stuck in the limbo of being too skilled to receive any encouragement and support from your peers but not skilled enough to be an idol people look up to
>Get discouraged
I know I shouldn't give up (and won't) as I'm doing the hobby for myself and because it's fun but god damn it does sting.
No. 1648975
File: 1690716246876.jpg (67.46 KB, 600x600, Hatsune.Miku.600.286392.jpg)
i dont want summerbreak to end. I don't wanna take my exams. I don't want the new university semester to begin. I loathe this.
I wish it wasn't so hard. I wish I was attractive and likable enough so I could just marry rich and stop worrying about these things. But then again those types of marriages requires that I birth children and im bad with children and would end up neglecting them. Plus im also super sex repulse so i can never get married.
My fear of marriage triumphs over my fear of studying so i just have to power trough this but i wish everything was easier. I wish I wasnt so stupid
No. 1648989
File: 1690717732323.jpeg (38.95 KB, 192x291, 607B95A2-583D-40C7-861A-6335EE…)
I’m so scared of everything. I want to talk to my dad. We can’t ever talk long due to issues with my mother. We talked last night and I told him I’m scared of this new medication I’m supposed to take. I just want to be a kid again, even though my childhood wasn’t great and I was neglected and shit but I wish I could snuggle with my dad in the comfy chair while rewatching Stargate SG1 again. Idk how he even puts up with me but I want my dad
No. 1649002
>>1648979>Marry for love and affection>Date for a couple of years before tying the knot>Wedding costs are expensive but you've always wanted one>No rich groom or family to help you pay so you have to save for years to make modest wedding happen>Both of you work full time but just like every other woman your age, you do most of the cleaning, cooking, and management>Husband whines that his love language is physical affection and that you're not giving him enough sex>Have sex more often because you feel guilty about not maintaining the relationship>Birth control fails/you decide to have children>Like most men, he's a shit father who takes on minimal duties and never wakes up>"Why didn't you ask!" when you freak that the baby hasn't been changed while he games>You're constantly exhausted and living in hell from having to work full time, take care of a newborn, and do all the cleaning and cooking>tfw no money for nanny or a maid or eating out>Baby and husband are constantly sick because you married for love and didn't evaluate your mate as a potential genetic source for your future children>Husband gets mad that you're not putting out as much because you're too injured from childbirth, that you still have the baby weight (it's only been 6 months), and that you're constantly angry and snappish from having to do everything>Starts cheating because "he's neglected!">Leaves you for fun younger woman who doesn't ask him to do things like take out the trash>No alimony because he was too poor for that>Barely any child support because he's poor>Drowning in medical debt and having to pause your career to give birth to his offspringLove is a chemical reaction that can be recreated anywhere with the right conditions. Study hard and focus on your career and make sure you cuff a husband who can afford alimony. Don't settle for an average man just because of the fairytale of love conquers all. That is a luxury that only men, who get a mommy and a bangmaid when they marry, can afford.
No. 1649011
>>1648975Anyways… sorry about that miserable dick who can't cope.
I'm sorry you're going through this. I've always had a very difficult time with studying and school; it came so naturally to everyone else. I'm sure you're feeling pretty frustrated. If you want some advice, I would see if you have ADHD or depression, and do your best to treat those. Look into learning disabilities. Guidance counselors can be hit or miss, but they're better than nothing. It's been some years since it was my time for college, so there may be more resources now. Maybe other anons will know.
>>1648979 and
>>1649002 are right. You really do not want to marry for money or stability, and get trapped in hell. Take a look at the reddit hate thread for awful examples. It sounds terrifying, but there are other options that don't involve becoming dependent on a moid (and NO, I am not talking about sex work).
No. 1649081
File: 1690727796929.jpg (266.67 KB, 1012x1200, Spotted pressed openended_000e…)
>>1649003>>1649015Aww, mad that your nigel is a failson and now your fear of sunk cost keeps you trapped? Don't be a crab Nona, warn others of your mistakes, don't demand they make the same ones.
No. 1649093
>>1649011thanks
nonnie. Im diagnosed with add and i do have a counselor. which is why it makes it more painful im failing so much.
The other anons are right i shouldn't drop out, which I have no intentions of doing but this is a vent thread and i was venting about how my life could had been different
No. 1649103
File: 1690730475633.jpg (115.05 KB, 692x825, 1671717253320.jpg)
>>1649086Sure thing Jan. You're so happy and fulfilled, that's why you're on lolcow trying to convince girls that a poor man is "just as good!" kek
No. 1649123
File: 1690731858290.jpeg (120.48 KB, 450x727, IMG_7323.jpeg)
today it is getting to me just how much of a loser i am. for a while it hasnt been, and i wont let it ruin my day, but im dreading turning 23 in a few months with nothing to show for it. i have a shitty part time job while others my age have big time jobs, are moved out and have stable income. meanwhile i wont graduate for another two years. i dont even know how to find a better or “big girl” job. i live with my mother and our two dogs and help pay rent and im grateful for that. i have a long distance boyfriend i get to see sometimes. i have no friends, just a few online. i havent been so good with my diet and exercise due to college and moving stressors but i want to start again. i have no money i feel i look frumpy too but cant afford nicer clothes right now, or eyelash extensions or to fix my hair up. all i can really do is inner work with my therapy and exercise and eat well. but i feel like i dont look womanly enough. i dont know how to. i cant afford my hobbies aside from a couple anymore but i know i was lucky to have them for when i did. i miss ballet the most. a little adult class id take! anyway i just do not know where i am in life or where i should be. i know what i want but im unsure how to map it out, where to begin while avoiding burn out because i am already taking more steps but feel sometimes im ready for the next. am i a lost cause? do i embrace that? i want to do more for animals, for the environment for others but also i want to work on my appearance and figure out how to get a real job one day and build a better morning and night routine. not to mention im very shy and have little confidence, if anyone new met me i think itd be hard to fake it. i want to fake it and believe in myself because maybe i can waitress or babysit for money. i am stable and medicated now so. idont cry or hurt myself or feel suicidal these days i have HOPE but that hope is misplacced and confusing. i will be healing from childhood trauma forever and accept that it made me fall behind but how do i catch up or ensure im meeting milestones? i want to doll myself up and wear nice clothing and have a proper routine again and feel confident that i can do what i set my mind to. im ready. i am ready. but where do i begin. if i am going to turn 23 id rather embrace it than dread it.
No. 1649130
>>1649123I’m sorry you’re feeling so low about yourself, nona. I don’t think you sound juvenile or like coming from a teen, you’re an adult who knows what she wants in life, and you deserve it.
Fresh new clothes would be amazing; do remember that you don’t need lash extensions or accessories to be “womanly enough”. You’re as womanly as you can be already by sole virtue of being female, and any “add ons” are actually and ironically pure masculinity, because it’s male-owned industries pushing a male-fantasy onto your female body, your hard earned money is better spent on things that don’t try to modify your already perfect body!
No. 1649134
>>1649123>am i a lost cause?>23you're a child.
>i have a shitty part time job while others my age have big time jobs, are moved out and have stable income. that's not even remotely true. have you been hanging out with someone who makes you feel inadequate? maybe following some social media accounts? maybe the online friends constantly brag to you?
>eyelash extensions…are bullshit and a waste of money. most people look just as good or even better without them.
>i feel like i dont look womanly enoughwomanly enough for what?
>balleti've known some ex-ballerinas, and i think it was ballet that instilled the unhealthy perfectionism into you.
>how do i catch up or ensure im meeting milestones?it's not a race. there are no milestones.
No. 1649138
>>1649123i'm only a year older than you and i'm going to be 25 when i graduate. i used to feel behind my peers and sometimes i still do but i've finally found the career i want to enter and i remember that most people pick a career they get burnout only a couple years in. i worked a job i was given because my mom worked there for years which was very dead-end but working helped me stay on top of things but don't be like me, save the money you can set aside until you're absolutely certain you want to purchase x or y item for your wardrobe, etc.
just keep studying to graduate and keep working. and keep in mind, a lot of people in our age group who are ahead of us likely had rich parents and/or parents with involvement in their children's field of choice and it's very likely that's why they seem so ahead.
try to research possibilities with your degree and keep in mind any job that just requires a degree and doesn't care what it is in case you don't like any of the options
lastly, this really helped me: research on your own and/or talk to professors in any field you're interested in. call/email people in that field (at a local place or somewhere you'd like to move) about any job shadowing/internship/entry level jobs for students. job shadowing has helped me a lot as it can go on your resume and i saw first hand what i'd encounter at the job i want and solidified my choice. it may also get you an entry level job if they like you.
don't let the feelings of being "behind" get to you. if they're friends, be happy for them. if they're strangers online or people you went to school with and don't even know, who cares.
No. 1649151
>>1649129>>1649130>>1649134>>1649132>>1649138thank you for the kind words nonnies. i have been lurking some social medias as of late (despite not having any of my own) and i think it subconsciously
triggers me to feel a bit bad sometimes.
i agree, the people i know or have met that are ahead mostly have not had childhood traumas or events that held them back. in fact, they had college paid for/were well socialized and knew people that helped them get said job. im not jealous of this! i know they had their own issues in life. but yes thats an observation i forget.
i have considered sometime soon talking to professors or taking some career guidance course or seeing what resources i have. sadly my courses are online (im too far from the campus) and i reach out only to get responses that tell me x opportunity is not available to remote learners. like clubs/scholarship stuff. i really need to start accumulating references my professor recently modeled my essay to other students (can you fucking believe that with how im wording my post now..) and i think stuff like that will help me for my career.
all in all thank you nonnas ill do my best thank you for being so so kind.
No. 1649196
>>1647882As someone who was willing to accept anything to escape my
abusive scrote father, the only thing that would work is to offer her a place to live for free away from her father.
No. 1649215
File: 1690739988282.jpg (14.22 KB, 159x159, 2029741k6jfgmtnla.jpg)
>>1649204Kekk yeah I actually do
(infighting) No. 1649338
>>1649329I starved myself to an 18 BMI and still felt kinda chubby. Literally anything would make me bloated and I wouldn't even eat until after work because breakfast would make me look bloated all day. What cured the chubby look was working out a lot + low carb. My BMI is now 21 and I look skinnier because of muscle. Can finally eat without getting bloated.
I've seen other women say similar stuff before and I was like nooo they're lying, thinking my surviving off energy drinks was the only way to look skinny. If you're not ready to work out literally just cut the carbs it'll make a huge difference. Not eating less, but replacing carbs with other stuff.
No. 1649390
File: 1690755706271.jpg (8.44 KB, 269x187, download.jpg)
I'm going back to work tomorrow after a vacation that wasn't very good at all. So I am still mentally and emotionally drained. The saddest thing really was when I tried to explain it to a friend and she gave me the equivalent of the "Have you tried smiling more?" phrase aimed at depressed people, and my family is leaning hard into the "But at least you were off right???" I just feel sad about it, and not refreshed.
No. 1649450
File: 1690762132703.jpg (62.86 KB, 798x540, 36336n.jpg)
Falling back into some kinda cringe age regression phase again. Only listening to early 2000s pop music, playing old flash games, got some new girly decorations and thinking about painting my room pink, trying hard to think as little as possible, dressing like a teenager. It sounds like no big deal but I always do this when the depressive thoughts get extreme. I'll literally lay on the carpet blasting Britney Spears and pretending nothing is real and I'm absolutely not a failed loser I'm totally a young teenager with lots of hope and potential. Not the late 20s shut-in loser I actually am. I feel like going all in and full delusional mode. I just put pink highlights in my hair and have glittery nails. I feel like Pixyteri. I can't cope anymore, I want to be a full-time delusional, borderline schizophrenic, womanchild. Everything outside of my house is so uncomfortable and wrong and unnatural. I only feel good here. Yes, I have autism and I'm extremely cringe. Would you like to see the MyScene doll I just got? Yeah I didn't think so
No. 1649458
File: 1690762687110.jpg (71.24 KB, 1014x570, oscar-noms-2020-charlize-thero…)
>>1649450Is it really delusional or cringe if you aren't spending out of your means or doing it solely for social media attention? Indulging in things you didn't have access to when you were a kid is pretty normal in moderation and this hardly sounds unhealthy. You might look a little silly with pink highlights but idk you or what you look like so it could also look cute. Don't feel embarassed. The dressing like a teenager part might make you a little weird though.
No. 1649470
>>1649450You sound cool I'd love to have a friend like you
nonnie.
No. 1649475
>>1649458I guess it's the reason why I'm doing it that's bad? It's not my actual style, it's just a coping mechanism. Your pic is who I want to be.
>>1649460>>1649467>>1649470Thanks nonnies. Maybe it's not so bad after all and being cringe is okay.
No. 1649553
File: 1690769726178.jpg (45.04 KB, 637x479, 1690341244071278.jpg)
I know I am going to have a bf in the future but like. I want one now.
No. 1649692
>>1649663>>1649667Sadly I know he isn't lying because I receive notifications for 30+ missed calls and a bunch of frantic texts hours later when it happens, and I've tracked his suburb's outages. The net is already crappy in his area and the company found a longstanding malfunction when he called (apparently it affects him and 11 other houses, if he hadn't called it probably never would have been reported because all those neighbors are 70+.) He is, however, completely spineless and won't cause a fuss until I make him, so his worthless butt has been sitting with internet problems for months and I've been slowly losing my mind.
Can promise I'm gone if this happens again after it's supposedly fixed though. He could be 100% telling the truth by then but I'm impatient.
No. 1649714
>>1649692Well
nonnie, I trust your judgment. I hope your moid gets internet soon. I've lived without utilities for a while and it sucked.
No. 1649781
File: 1690780982946.jpg (10.83 KB, 275x275, 1664927616581.jpg)
>>1649737sorry anon…. that was me actually……
No. 1649785
File: 1690781063879.jpg (93.48 KB, 686x768, 1690334911217422.jpg)
>>1649781That is.. entirely too many………
No. 1649786
File: 1690781070516.jpeg (183.66 KB, 1152x1337, 1647397334719.jpeg)
>>1649781Thank you for coming forward. Now stop it.
No. 1649887
File: 1690788893636.jpg (132.29 KB, 1076x565, 1647566062507.jpg)
>>1649669>>1649702I feel you both!
Every time I start drawing I get frustrated and stop, saying I won't ever draw again, because I will never be good enough. Let time pass and I try again. I often have to think of Sisyphos.
No. 1650098
File: 1690812349958.png (241.67 KB, 720x665, 29D559CC-0F60-4DA4-8C80-C943F9…)
Why aren’t these faggots ever open on time holy shit I’m so annoyed
No. 1650115
>>1649836Ugh, how disgusting. I'm sorry you have to deal with those people, they make young womens' lives hell.
Good men who you want to date aren't going to be aggressive like desperate creeps and old perverts are. It may feel like those are the only guys you're attracting, but you never know. A dateable guy could be building up rapport with you and taking it slow. Or maybe you just haven't met anyone worth dating yet!
No. 1650117
File: 1690813826720.png (533 KB, 984x567, 1646392586185.png)
I fucking hate moids but my most comfortable way to live is to be nice to everyone. It's so strange, I feel the rage, I have no issues shitting on men online, I fully recognize dealing with them is a worthless and thankless endeavor. But as soon as I have to interact with one irl, I still default to trying to be polite and trying to uplift or help them when they're troubled. Like why the fuck am I doing this, statistically this faggot probably jerks off to women who look like children getting slapped and crying and would rather take sides defending any random man then a woman. Yet here I am consoling him.
No. 1650121
i always had more female friends than male, despite being a tomboy all throughout childhood/adolescence. i think because i wasn't seen as a girl by the boys i could navigate through their groups and kinda thought of them as low level citizens, or less important overall lol
however, now that i'm an adult and lost a bunch of friendships, i really feel like i'll never connect deeply with another girl and i'll never have a bestie again. it's so lonely out here nonnies. i used to have a group chat and it was so nice, we'd talk about anything, plan things to do together, gossip about everything, tell the weird dreams we had, send pics 24/7, it was the first chat i'd check in the morning.
i have a few female friends but they are not from a same friendgroup and they have other friends as well.
anyway, i think because of that i got a really weird habit of overanalyzing every female friendship i see, be it irl or in media. like, i'll analyse if they feel "real" or if they are too centered on boy's talk. i keep analyzing even my mom's female friends as if they were fake or something.
i keep getting into situations where i can only talk to women on a very shallow level and it feels awkward when there's no man around, as if we can only talk to each other without putting on a overly kind persona when there's a man involved.
No. 1650126
>>1650121I can totally relate to the first part of your post. I have two female friends, one from high school and a more recent one, but I almost never see them and I'm bad at texting and replying quickly. I love them and I'm glad to have them around, but I know they have stronger friendships with others or hang out with them more than me so I always feel like the second choice that's only there for advices.
When I meet women with similar interests, I might come off too strong and I end up being the only one asking to hang out or initiating discussion, although when we do it seems like they enjoy my company. What I wouldn't give for a sister-like relationship like I used to have.
No. 1650127
>>1648547I notice this all the time when watching older movies.I think my love of 70s/80s movies inoculated me from the outsized fear of aging a lot of my millennial cohort struggles with. The actresses look so womanly and confident.
I think the augmented permababy look will be the butt of a lot of jokes in the future, a la 80's frizzy perms. Like
>>1647606 said, these procedures end up looking kind of bad over time.
It just sucks that women have been beaten down by insane men and internet culture (perpetuated hardcore on lolcow lmao) about our looks to the point we're slicing ourselves up. The extreme dieting was bad enough.
No. 1650137
I don't know what the fuck to do with my moid. Just had a vet emergency, managed to get a vet appointment but the chicken kept looking worse by the minute, so I just asked him to drive me there earlier. He kept fucking around. So I called another vet, got a "come here immediately" and would've already driven myself.. Then he finally decided to help anyway, slow and inefficient and fucking stupid as always. "here's the towel you asked for" yes. For the grate. Not to god damn hold while I got my hands full of chicken.
Got there, the vet had relocated, new address. Google maps let's go, chicken keeps coughing and sneezing up gunk all over me. We get to the place Google maps said, place ain't there. He drives off to keep looking, I go on foot. Eventually back in the car and there he's starting to not scream but be very loud. "well where is it? What's the address?" I keep telling him the number, but he doesn't even register and just gets pissy at me for not knowing. Like you god damn fucker. How should I know?? I saw the same map on the door of the old vet office as you did. I'm holding a barely breathing chicken, try and keep cool and find the place and that shit stain just gets pissy and snappy and fuck that smegma filled piece of shit. If anything, I'd need your damn support right now, like how is it my job right now to keep calm while you loose your shit but it's my damn chicken close to dying in my arms.
The fucking ego and bullshit on all those crusty assholes.
(we made it. Vet immediately made time as I would've known with the other too. Bertha got a shot, and within seconds was hooked up to oxygen. The vet will call me if they know more.)
But then he got pissy at the supermarket too when I just.. Couldn't look at him. "so what, now you're not looking at me with your ass anymore?" like yes. Figure out what the fuck you did you waste of air.
I wasn't entirely calm either, but I did ask him not to snap at me and to chill. I was only hectic about holding Bertha and finding the place, I would've just gone the last few metres on foot too and all since I could already tell where it was.
Did manage to not cry in front of him for once. I'm too fucking angry and needed to control my breathing.
Hiding out at my neighbours who's not home right now. Might have stolen a bottle of booze of them but I'll replace it first thing tomorrow.
I just hope Bertha will be okay. I know it's "just" chickens. But they mean a lot to me. I've lost so many baby chicks this year, I just feel like I keep failing them all.. And I'm starting to truly resent my moid.
Thanks for reading. There is no reward sadly..
No. 1650147
>>1650137Tried to talk with him about it, he just can't even talk without getting pissed and snappy.. "well you were rude to me first!" I apologised, asked if he could remind me what I said so I wouldn't repeat it, I don't want to hurt him even if I despise him rn.. He can't fucking remember apparently. Just that it was supposedly horrible.
I know for a fact I didn't say much of anything. What a gaslighting piece of shit. I'm just.. He doesn't even know how close I am do being done. Moids can never really tell, can they? Then they're surprised when it happens. Suddenly you do get all the apologies you were hoping for, all the platitudes.. But once the mind's made up.
AND BERTHA IS FINE AND I CAN GO PICK HER UP. HAH. one of my first rescue chickens.. I'm relieved. But still fucking pissed, I'll drive myself this time.
No. 1650210
>>1650145Comfort and habit I suppose. The whole "no-one will want you over 30 anymore" and feeling lonely at the ass end of my country. We're now 1 1/2 years but I'm fucking tired.
It took half an hour of arguing that he finally admitted: that yes, I'd asked him to drive me to the other vet too and that I can guarantee this is an emergency they'll take us on immediately. He just didn't feel like waiting for an hour.. My vet wouldn't have watched as my chicken died in the waiting area.
Half an hour argument over that.. Until he finally admitted that yes, he heard me ask him to drive anyway since the vet will make time for us.
I'm struggling hard with alcohol rn, this is just so much bullshit and gaslighting. But I'm too scared to say: "alright. That's it. I'm done."
No. 1650269
I'm so tired. I'm helping my adult sibling escape a bad home situation, but I'm one of their only resources. It's not as simple as just packing them up and leaving, there are animals involved too that neither of us will just ignore. The whole thing is stressing me out to the point I've been losing sleep the past few weeks and it's all I think about. My sibling is so developmentally delayed from being denied the help they need and they don't have any life skills other than cooking and cleaning. It's so much harder than when I left but we can't just leave it like this. Our dad is the only other person actively trying to help but he's dealing with so much shit in his own life that he can't focus on this situation as much. I don't resent him for it, because he can't control what he has to deal with, but it's very frustrating. Or maybe I do resent him a bit. I don't know. Staying on top of my bills, dealing with a physically demanding job, trying to rehome an excessive amount of animals, and getting my sibling out of that house, all while trying not to spiral and make sure my sibling is going to be okay. I feel like a zombie, barely existing. People at work constantly ask if I'm okay because I just 'go elsewhere' mentally and run on autopilot.
Alongside the exhaustion, I'm fucking terrified of when we do finally manage to get them and the animals out, because who knows what hell is going to rain down upon us as a result. Yeah, it'll probably be a quick explosion and the fallout may not last long either, but there's an ingrained fear in me about what might happen. I just want to get it done and over with so we can move on and start looking at the future positively. And I want to sleep again. I really wish that our mother would just die already.
No. 1650327
File: 1690834439358.gif (219.54 KB, 400x288, spongebob-work.gif)
I really feel picrel right now. All I've been doing is just wake up, commute, go to work, commute again, and sleep. I don't do anything fun on the weekend. I don't go out or have a social life or make friends. I have nothing to look forward to. I feel some kind of existential dread crawling under my skin and it makes me so uneasy and anxious. It feels like I'm just existing, not really living.
No. 1650366
File: 1690839094031.jpg (131.04 KB, 1024x1018, E_1YymDVEAIYAlh.jpg)
Lately it feels like my work friend is being weirdly passive aggressive and competetive towards me and I don't know how to navigate these things as an autistic woman, said friend is self-diagnosed autistic too and gradually seems to be passive aggressive, copies me, and it feels like she tries to show me up around others for seemingly no reason. We were getting ready for a night out recently and she put her wedding ring on and snarked at me "Men only look at YOU because you don't have a ring on", as if men don't sometimes just like me, or vice versa, and have different types. She is an angel to me around her husband and in private she's been snarky with me and competetive both at work and over things like appearance and goals. She's also started copying aspects of my hobbies and personality and things she never cared about before. What gives?
I remain really neutral towards her but I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt me a bit. She's also been increasingly bitchy at work and my colleagues are starting to get fed up of her. I don't know where I'm going with this, just sucks.
No. 1650399
File: 1690841600991.jpg (65.68 KB, 1024x768, creme.jpg)
One of my friends wants to come over for dinner and I like the idea of cooking meals and entertaining people, so it sounds nice. But she's a literal anachan and can't even finish a kid size ice cream. She takes a few bites of food and then is finished. On the flipside seeing food wasted bugs the shit out of me. So I keep avoiding the topic and I feel like an asshole
No. 1650411
File: 1690843181538.jpg (41.66 KB, 473x465, Tumblr_l_133649118862504.jpg)
I feel like my boyfriend's love for me has just slowly seeped away. He used to care so much about me and do these big loving gestures but now he just treats me as a stupid burden. He just ignores me or yells at me or acts fake af to me. Fr I just wanna die I just wish he would love me again
No. 1650423
>>1650418Yeah you're right. I feel like I should maybe talk to her about this beforehand and see what foods
trigger her or are ok and how much to serve her but I'm also afraid of embarrassing her
No. 1650432
There is something wrong with me and I think that I will die soon. I am losing the capacity of expressing my thoughts and my body is breaking down. I have nobody in my life. I don't have friends, family, siblings, most men of a similar level of intelligence reject me, I cannot work due to mental and physical illness. I live in a third world country it would be so much easier if I gained something material. Like if I had family. If I was able to work. If I had a boyfriend or friends. Basically I have no form of social status or integrity and my whole life I've been degraded or harassed for things people recieve empathy for. I am deprived of anything that is necessary to stay alive and nobody is helping me and people on the internet, past friends are slowly watching me decay from mental illness and lack of a support system and nobody is intervering. My whole life I've been ignored, gaslit, abused even by my peers, objectified. I have never felt what it is like to have love, companionship, authority, integrity, freedom. I have been reduced to an animal my entire life and it won't get better. All people treat me the same, they spite me, harass me, lie about me. Have you ever heard of someone being harassed for suffering from mental illness/physical illness and poverty. People in those situations usually recieve help and support and empathy. I have never. I have nothing to hold onto. I am isolated from my peers. I sit in complete isolation for 5 months in a room completely desolated and from isolation, harassment, from not having my needs met I end up beating myself with fists until I faint out of deprivation. Why is my life like this? Sometimes I look at animals on the internet and they recieve more care and help than I ever did or will. Nobody has ever cared about me or offered me love or support. I have been degraded, abused, objectified my entire life. My whole. Life I've had to chase people and ask them for crumbs of attention. My emotional needs have never been fulfilled, my desires have never mattered. I am. Filled with rage towards everyone and I just cannot form connections with people or get people to help me or do things for me. I wish I could get a boyfriend or a girlfriend. It is so fucking devasting to me that I am. 25 and this is my life. A lif of never-ending humiliation instilled onto me by my family in my childhood, by my peers in school, by people on the internet. Nobody has ever loved me or offered me care and I have never mattered. My feelings never mattered. It feels so weird to realize that my life is lesser than that of an animal and the humiliation and harassment from everyone continues. People are taking pleasure in torturing me and I don't know how to stop them. I am actually a very loving person, I am well read and I know a lot of things I am incredibly sensitive it is just getting harder and harder and I live In solitude because everytime I reach out to someone they somehow end up fighting with me, degrading me, not listening to my problems, stealing something from me. It feels like I have to walk on eggshells with everyone while everyone crushes me. I am dying from deprivation and people are enjoying it. They like it and they like to torture me even more. I have never ever been listened to it is almost like my words and what I. Communicate doesn't reach anyone. My problems, needs, desires have been ignored and neglected and the isolation and deprivation hurts the most. It is so painful being completely isolated and the only. Time someone noticed you they tell you to go somewhere else or that you don't deserve help or they decide it is proper to. Torment you even more. I have never ever been taken seriously and my entire life my experience had been denied or I have been gaslit. I have been abused in mass, on a global. Level and I'm dying from deprivation and nobody cares. Nobody. I had dreams and aspirations why do I have to die like this in utter loneliness and nobody has ever even listened to me. Or understood the kind of person that I am? Why have my boundaries been crossed my whole life?
No. 1650491
>>1650479Most people have family, significant others, friends that help them. The internet is filled with munchies that have friends, families, support systems and trannies that get showered in money. No, I cannot work. I have catatonic episodes and I'm losing the capacity to move my body. Thanks for telling me I don't deserve dignity, help, love and compassion. Chronic illness doesn't work like this at all. You have no idea how. Much effort I've put into getting better since I was a kid to improve my health. All people have family, friends, significant others I have nothing plus I am chronically ill. I am just astoished at how people don't even read or listen to what I am saying. Do you think I wouldn't work and I'd choose to die on a couch in a room that I've been trying to escape for 13 years. You're gaslitint me and showing no empathy towards my sitwtion which is just fucking shocking to me. I haven't witnessed anyone in a similar life situation be abused by peers and society as I have been. You are saying I am not worthy of help of friendship, of love. You are not even listening to what I am saying. You are literally not reading or being receptive towards my issues.
No. 1650510
>>1650488Nobody has been kind or helpful towards me. You are constantly telling me that I am lying when literally everything that I have said is true. You're telling me to "just get a job" and that I am lying when literally I am fucking dying with no. Help and nobody by my side and I have nobody to talk to because all people antagonize me and tell me I'm lying or that I didn't do enough or that I don't wanna work. I put in so. Much fucking effort into everything. I am not even allowed to rant on an imageboard without being told that I'm lying or without being harassed and not offered empathy. Simply I am dying I tried my best to work, to access medical help, to get friends or anything a boyfriend or girlfriend someone to help me or. Love me all. People reject me and objectify me. Literally everyone, even like minded people. Within society usually people offer each other assistance and empathy and I have never felt that. I have never even felt like anyone has actually listened to me.
It is degrading watching pets on social media that have more love, resources or support than you ever will and realizing your death is at the corner and you cannot even complain about your problems without being relentlessly harassed. My issues are actually quite major
No. 1650799
File: 1690881561046.gif (1.81 MB, 500x370, fumingif.gif)
I started using an anti-aging eye cream about three weeks ago because I have crows feet despite only being in my mid 20s and I've gotten increasingly self-conscious about it. Today I noticed I've developed crepe-y wrinkling on my lower lids that I have not had before. Fuck eye creams. and no, i haven't applied it by rubbing, i pat it. i'm not a complete fucking idiot.
No. 1650815
>>1650597Depending on where you’re from it can be a cultural thing. Like if you’re a burger individualism is a huge cultural pillar in people’s personal philosophy. People are very protective of themselves for fear of betrayal and etc. Sometimes their circle of trust only extends to immediate family but that’s it. Then they’re people who are more communal but usually that is a state of being that never leaves their family. These people place family first extended and immediate alike.
I’ve noticed as someone who hates her family and puts friends first people like me are rare. You’ll have to try to find people similar to you if you want lasting friendships because normies will push you away since they can tell you’re different right off the bat.
No. 1650821
>>1650597If it makes you feel any better I have the same thing happen to me, but I've managed to connect with at least two people in the last 10 years and that's better than nothing. Never stop trying to connect
nonnie, never stop being yourself, it will pay off eventually. I know I'd appreciate your friendship.
No. 1650912
I genuinely don't know if me crying rn is because of self pity or because there is something deeply wrong. I've always had some extremely deeply rooted procrastination issues, but now they've taking on massive proportions. At my last job people were happy enough about my work, my manager thought I was a dummy but everybody else (colleagues and bosses) liked my work well enough. At this new (~1year) job, I started off strong but this current project is really going down the shitter, I'm basically working alone on a piece of code and I have to do regular presentations of analyses to show my progress. The people who are using my work weren't pleased with me because I was too slow (didn't get any deadlines really). I got stressed when my manager told me what they were saying, I tried to fix it by being better but then I made a huge mistake and got turned down for a PHD offer by my manager. Since then I have lost a big chunk of my motivation and confidence. I've tried to correct it but my procrastination has gotten worse and my mental health has really been going down the shitter, I've made the same careless mistakes and nothing really changes, I oscillate between being optimistic and happy, failing at work, and being almost depressed, I feel like I'm not cut out for work. I don't want to quit and just flee the situation but I don't know what to do, but I know my manager has half given up on me. Now I made ANOTHER really dumb mistake in this morning's meeting. I mistook june for july and did a full analysis that made no sense, because I was trying to be quick as I didn't plan properly. I'm such a careless procrastinating dumbass. I just have one thing to finish and then I can go on holidays.
No. 1650916
>>1650892just wait before some nona comes out calling you a predator here too, kek. So many people infantilize moids, even here, its so fucking sad. Enjoy your pre-wall moid
nonny, dont let retards with internalized mysogyny force you to settle for bald heads and wrinkly balls.
No. 1650925
File: 1690899185105.jpg (71.2 KB, 735x708, 1670483001018.jpg)
>>1650921let her enjoy pre-wall moids you retirement home robber
No. 1650958
>>1650892Because you're making them feel othered. A lot of women who go for older men kid themselves that it's "natural" and unironically say or think things like "All women want a daddy replacement, older men are just hot, men who are actually my age or younger are like babies".
If more women dated men their age or younger, it just drives home the point of how weird it is to be dating old men who are often actually predatory, only getting their way because they have a financial advantage over said women,
abusive, the "replace or cheat with a younger model when the one you're with gets too old/is no longer fun" type, etc. The hypocritical women you know probably have stories of their older men cheating on them.
Also, due to misogyny and the way society is set up, women are typically more infantilized and socially treated as "younger" up until they're in their 40s, or if they're mothers (and look the part). There are unironically more women in their 30s who think/act/look like they're in their 20s than can ever be said for 30+ year old men.
No. 1651055
>>1650892You're only getting judged because you're a woman, no one bats an eye at an under 10 year age gap when the man is the oldest. Double standards at it's finest. Even on here.
>>1651006Hope you re-directed him to a prostitute. Nasty moids really be thinking they can pay for sex with dinner under the guise of a date.
No. 1651089
>>1650892I'm 23 and if a 31 year old tried flirting with me I'd think she's a weirdo. Both you and the moids that date young women with underdeveloped brains are weirdos. It's either funny that women that married a decade older men at 18 judge you or alarming if they realised they've been
victims to a groomer all along. And that 30 year old moid you dated was the retard that had the younger mental age, doesn't mean normal men don't get properly mature. Maybe your mental age is also too low to match up to people your age
No. 1651165
File: 1690918920903.jpg (47.34 KB, 563x774, ef1726f63979748b7aa024b2166160…)
>be me
>get dumped
>horny and touch starved 24/7
God I hate this. Sometimes I wish I was a moid so that I could just sleep around whenever I feel like it.
No. 1651170
>>1651165That cat is howling
and so is yours, apparently, oh my god. I wonder what he/she was saying.
No. 1651194
File: 1690920543706.jpg (1.1 MB, 2598x4458, Picsart_23-08-02_01-26-11-426.…)
My mom likes sending me random yt videos and just now, she sent one saying "look, even a baby is smarter than you", it was a video of a reporter not being able to hold back her laughter after seeing a toddler seriously try to perform CPR on a dummy. I knew the video was cute, but the comments won't be. Still checked them out because I'm retarded, and now I'm going to spend rest of the night wanting to kill pedos with my own hands. I despise them so much and hate that they're free enough to leave behind their disgusting comments instead of being locked up somewhere and suffering for the eternity. They deserve the absolute worst but they never fucking get what they deserve.
No. 1651202
File: 1690920965924.jpeg (20.93 KB, 320x260, IMG_2649.jpeg)
I’M SO TIRED OF BEING THE ONE TO ARRANGE STUFF WITH MY FRIENDS AND EVEN BEING THE FIRST ONE TO EVEN GET IN TOUCH WITH THEM MAJORITY OF THE TIME!! Feels like I could die or completely disappear off the face of the earth tomorrow and nobody would notice, and it legit makes me want to die. I want to be honest with them about how deeply I feel about this because I know it’s not because they don’t care - they’re just unaware and caught up with their own stuff - but I feel like I would come off as dramatic or manipulative so it would just backfire. I hate this. I want to die. Hell I even want to self-harm because of how the more I think about this the more lonely and worthless I feel.
No. 1651227
>>1650873Hey, nonna, I'm sorry you went through that. I was in the same situation since I was very young, but unfortunately my dad never mellowed out. He's been screaming and cussing both myself AND his fiance since I moved back in a month ago, so I've been dramatically wishing both of us were dead (not his fiance, she's annoying sometimes, but sweet lol). More likely I'll just start growing my own weed in the sideyard to torment him since I can't escape this hell kek
I think an important thing to think about is whether he seemed to only lose his temper with you. People who can't help who they blow up on probably have intermittent explosive disorder. But I noticed my dad never blows up on his coworkers, clients, my friends, or certain relatives. That behavior in particular really made me start thinking it was intentional.
If there aren't similar patterns to your dad's behavior, then he might just be an asshole who feels guilty about screaming at a little girl and identifies with the shitheel parents you bring up to him kek
No. 1651242
File: 1690923538559.jpg (20.56 KB, 320x427, 34a5bd55f5e56940c472ce744f62c8…)
Just discovered that my ex follows half naked girls and titty streamers on IG and I just want to vomit and jump off a cliff. No one would've guessed that from interacting with him irl. Fucking hell. Can't trust any man. Disgusting.
No. 1651254
>>1651252You can just see through all the bullshit
nonnie, same thing happened to me. Even the cute ones give me the ick.
No. 1651264
File: 1690924513828.png (621.94 KB, 680x464, me.png)
Went out today on vacation and I don't think I've ever had this much caffeine in my life. I was trying different teas. I am actually vibrating. Holy shit I regret this.
No. 1651268
>>1651237Kek sorry about no responses, nonna. I'm not always in vent thread but I sometimes am astounded by what anons ignore to infight over something extremely stupid. That's why I've never posted my own vent, but I think others are pretty brave for doing it.
You can't choose your family, and you can't control the healthcare professionals around you, but you can choose your friends. If they ignore or belittle you, find new friends. You also need to do your part and communicate your needs, and be sure to reciprocate care. Nobody likes being forced to emotionally coddle someone all the time bc it's draining.
I know it sounds dismissive, but just be more selective with friendships and stay mindful of your own behavior in the relationship. It may take a while to find an excellent friend who supports you, but it will always be worth the wait.
No. 1651269
>>1651264Oh man. Tea drunkenness is something else,
nonnie! It’s not just the caffeine affecting you. Google tea drunkenness, tea by itself has so many psychoactive compounds that a mfer can really feel after a while kek
No. 1651280
>>1651268It’s fine anon, some people need that tough love and I usually prefer having someone being gentle but straight honest instead of coddling.
I’m typically the person everyone relies on for advice or just a listening ear because I’m known in my circles for being very down to earth and apparently give great advice, but since I know I am secretly a bit unstable I once every blue moon end up having EXTREMELY rough nights where I honestly just want some validation on my personal griefs and a pat on the head so I can take a break from being everyone’s mom. Just being seen by you made me feel a wee bit better lmao but I do admit I am awful at properly conveying what kind of help I want from my friends when I reach out, because even if I never really feel burdened by them I feel like I would be a burden on them.
No. 1651281
>>1651198>strange/unheard of for younger people to have all the same experiences as them (or even more)It's literally impossible for someone young to be mature in the same way an older person is. Some things in life just take time, you can't speedrun it. An older person can definitely be sheltered and immature, but it doesn't work the other way.
I'm inclined to agree with
>>1651192 No. 1651303
>>1651254I guess we’re just too pinkpilled that men aren’t attractive anymore kek. I feel guilty when I talk to someone who seems really healthy (no weird/
problematic opinions, emotionally open, lots of things to talk about), but I’m not attracted to them at all. And I obviously don’t want someone who treats me like shit either. Well, the search continues…
No. 1651324
File: 1690928338847.png (152.47 KB, 721x968, Screenshot 2023-08-01 at 18-19…)
>>1651311>>1651296Women generally prefer and perform better in higher temperatures and "feel the cold" more.
No. 1651326
File: 1690928524653.jpeg (25.94 KB, 818x568, 1684828200171.jpeg)
I feel like I'm never gonna be able to find love as long as I don't have a visa. My life is split between the EU and US. I can't get the right visa yet for the US and even after jumping through hoops to finally get it, it will be insanely hard to find a local job that pays enough in my industry to live in the city where I come a few months at a time. I have friend groups in both countries and my whole family in one. It's so fucking hard to leave and come back each way every time. I feel like no one wants to actually get serious with me because they know I'm not here basically half the year. In each country I feel like I'm too influenced by the other to truly fit in. There's a ton of things I culturally don't understand because of time (not) spent in both countries. Also I feel like all my friendships eventually decay because I can't be in one place all the time. I feel so damn alone.
I just want the stupid visa already, but the idea of leaving my family and oldest friends on one continent and visiting less often is making me so upset I wanna cry. I've already accepted that (with any luck) I'm probably gonna settle down with a burgerfag, but there are things about my birth country that simply can't be replicated here, cultural references Americans just can't understand, all this shit I know could be heavy to deal with for my partner. I can't force someone to learn a language, but having to speak only English with the person I live with would eventually make me sad.
It's always easy to date in burgerland but they get scared the second they understand I'm not here all the time right now. I get it, I also couldn't do long distance. But I feel like I'm going crazy being alone through all this and only getting affection through sex, when there are so many binational couples that quickly moved in together. I wish it could be me so bad
No. 1651413
>>1651395I am not a man but usually most people will gain an emotional relationship or fulfil a need in someone they see as being able to provide a service, and then start out with small requests such as "can you hand me X" or "can you ask Y about Z for me" to test if how the person reacts, how willing, how resistant or eager, if they are careful or careless, etc. Then they add in bigger tasks ("this is important document/valuable, don't lose it" or if in a position of power they may make them their assistant, callback, etc. or may use vague statements to provoke insecurity, but comes off as secretive or special "when Jane Doe did this position, she couldn't lay off the candy bars" "when Jane Doe worked for this other company, she was lazy at her work", eventually they may ignore or disregard you sometimes for other people, other employees, or ignore you completely but then they'll "rubberband" and if the person comes back, usually, if not always, they do since they're desperate for the validation you provide, and you'll know they're hooked on you. From here you can work up again or get them to accomplish the big task, which by now should 100% work and be successful because now they know what it's like to lack you.
No. 1651454
>>1651450A lot of countries differ on those laws. Also, a lot of it isn't based in logic or any scientific evidence, but the weird and arbitrary opinions of those in power (eg you can go to war at 18, but not smoke a cigarette, drink or rent a vehicle in the US).
In any case, we're not talking about minors, but adults in their 20s.
No. 1651475
File: 1690943656463.jpeg (9.13 KB, 275x221, 1669743679747.jpeg)
I can't decide whether to go into business analytics or data analytics. They are both very appealing to someone like me, however, I can't just decide since they're both so damn good. I'm currently in a program for an associates in data analytics so I have this year to decide whether to switch to business analytics or stick with my current program since the prerequisite classes I'm taking overlap with prerequisites for the associate degree programs for business analytics and data analytics. Any nonnies here have experience with both fields and wouldn't mind sharing their experiences? Deciding on things is such a pain.
No. 1651510
>>1651482I totally get what you mean. I still can't bring myself to delete the DMs I had with my ex even though we broke up more than a year ago. Sometimes I read them to remind myself what I had lost and to remind myself to not repeat the same mistake again so I can grow into a better person. But sometimes it's also to remind myself that my ex wasn't a great person either so I feel less bad about the breakup and to convince my brain to dislike her. But that doesn't really work for me and it feels like I'll always idealize her and our relationship. I know it's not healthy to keep living in the past especually when she has already moved on but it's just hard.
What did you two have a conflict with? Maybe you'll move on once you find better friends.
No. 1651603
File: 1690953401090.jpg (51.03 KB, 634x951, 73099347-12288285-image-a-132_…)
>>1651599
No. 1651745
File: 1690975578897.jpg (488.17 KB, 1500x2275, axel-sauerwald-lost-ones.jpg)
I loved him, I saw beauty in him, I stayed with him for 2 years… he was finally starting to get better…
I am a loser like he is, and I am 30, I realized if I didn't start fixing myself, I'd be up shit creek…
I am scared of socializing, I am a NEET, not as bad as he is…
I started to go outside, I am terrified but I am fighting, I am doing it…
He lands a possible job, hasn't even done the interview, and he won't go turn in more interviews, he just sits on his fucking ass and signs up for sites that he most likely won't get any money from…
Refuses to EAT SHIT TO BECOME A BETTER PERSON, LIKE I AM TRYING TO DO… we will never meet, it will never happen… I will spite him by becoming better than him, I hope he rots in jail, because it's the only place he will be going…
I am not holding out hope that he will get his act together, I don't have enough energy these days… because I am loving him with all my heart by becoming someone that can actually become something in life…
He'd rather rot that be with me… even after all we went through, all the time we spent together… My heart is a pit of heartbroken angry vipers…
Picture is unrelated, it just fits my mood right now…
No. 1651781
File: 1690980954491.png (783.52 KB, 900x600, 1537636788008.png)
Sometimes I wish that I had actually gone through with killing myself. I'm not exactly suicidal anymore, but I feel like I completely fucked my life over in the months leading up to it- cutting off and ending relationships friends and family members and getting rid of a majority of my shit in order to prepare, only to then chicken out the week I was supposed to do it. I never told anyone what I was going to do, and now it just seems extremely embarrasing to bring up.
And now after years of fantasising about it and preparation, I feel almost completely empty and have zero motivation to do a single thing. I suppose I'm just going to keep on existing until I don't because I royally fucked my life up that bad. I don't see much point in seeking help either.
No. 1651788
>>1651781Are you me? I was in the exact same situation, I even deleted all my favourite movies and pics from my laptop, as I wanted it to be a given to charity
I talked about this with my father a years bac, he then opened up to me and told me about how when my mother was pregnant with my older sister he was in special forces training at that time and he was half way though when he got a call of how my mother's physical and mental was deteriorating and regrettably he dropped out of SF training course to be with his pregnant wife and he was labelled as a coward and quitter by his other friends, he told me that for a long he had always wondered about "what If" he stayed and how much cred it would have given in but after a while he realized that the was the decision he made and he can't change that but he can always change what direction his life is headed as long he was still alive and that I can too
That's all we can do really.
No. 1651804
>>1651568You're an idiot and the way that you write is unapologetically retarded. It is like saying someone that has been raped or bullied or a child starving in Africa are "manifesting" their problems. Sure, I manifested being born in poverty, having no support system, being harassed on the internet and in real life, being born with terrible mental illness and physical illness, being abused so badly by my peers and by my parents that I am considering suicide. It is all my fault, it isn't like I actually want to be happy and have friends and a family and support. It isn't like I have been attempting that for 12 years but literally almost everyone harasses me or sodomizes me and nobody no matter how much effort I put into my life has ever been there fully or made me feel human and all people give me scraps of attention like I am a fucking beggar and since I was a kid I have been blamed for my problems by everyone. It feels so nice to actually have people listen to me and empathize with me and not blame me for my problems. I just have never witnessed anyone being treated the way that I have.
>>1651602I tried really hard to quit this shitshow called the internet that has inflicted more irreparable damage onto my already fragile psyche. It is just impossible for me. Most of my life I have been rejected and isolated by my peers no matter how much effort I put into it. People in real life sort of push me to the side or ignore me even when I place incredible amounts of effort into the interactions or try to make them feel good. Literally nobody in my life has ever messaged me first or offered to help me with anything or just assist me. People assist one another all the time in society and in my care even small things would help me. Not only am I in a horrible situation literally my entire life people and friends have asked me for money and things…I want meaningful relationships and connections. I have been seeking them but they never happen and usually people that have a similar level of intelligence or similar interests reject me because of the way that I come off.
No matter how hard I try I cannot land any respect, love, support or stability within my life. I have no living quality literally and everything people tell me is just "get a job" kek it is almost fucking surreal. People that don't have jobs, that are relatively privileged or have houses and have stability from their parents just tell me "get a job" and ignore all the circumstances that make up my life. I just wish that I could get things out of people like most people do but I'm unable to. I just wish I could scam dirty scrotes on the internet out of money with no actual repercussions or that I'd get men pouring hundreds of dollars into my stream daily simply for existing like it happens to a lot of women. Hell, I wish that I just had people to talk to that don't deny and undermine my life situation and that I can actually be friends with. Even on the internet! I don't know why I have to leave everywhere I go because I end up being mocked and harassed by people that are literally dumber than I am. I don't know it is like I am unable to get anything good out of any situation…
Anything would be better than this.
No. 1651805
File: 1690984434020.jpeg (238.96 KB, 768x1100, a532e876-cee9-4ff9-bc23-095014…)
>>1651677silly anecdote incoming: the way CLAMP use to draw everyone with meaty arms (relatively speaking for manga and in proportion to their bodies) made me stop feeling self-conscious about my own arms. granted I was a teenager and had no perspective on what was normal… but maybe you just need to see some big arm representation? it sounds like you actually look good.
No. 1651810
>>1651804Not the same
nonnie you were talking to, but you might be suffering from expressing your sadness far to often. It sucks ass, but I started seeing people enjoy me more when I stopped dumping my trauma at their doorstep.
Most people are dealing with a fuck ton of bullshit in their own personal lives, so hearing about yours might be why you never get positive responses to things you say.
I had to learn the hard way after years of isolation to realize that complaining or acting sad is a major reason why no one gave a fuck about me.
I feel yuh
nonnie, I really do. Not everyone is an asshole, but most are.
No. 1651823
>>1651781A bit ago I posted here about wishing I had gone through killing myself early on, and someone came saying I’m insane and retarded and that I needed therapy (already on it) and a job and that no wonder why I’m alone because I sounded socially inept and “nobody has thoughts like that” kek. I guess your post is validating, though I’m not happy you’re feeling like this.
Anon, please do seek help, you deserve it. You don’t sound like a bad person at all, you care about the friends you cut off and that sounds like they cared for you as well. It’s worth it that if you’re gonna stick around, you do it with things in your favor: eat healthy, excercize, try to socialize etc etc… AND look for someone who can help you get through this. You may need medication, wouldn’t you like to at least be able to bear with those feelings? I think you should feel freer. I believe in you.
No. 1651826
>>1651820I understand he has a lot of mental bull crap to go through, but understanding doesn't remove the absolute broken feeling I get whenever I am reminded that he could care less.
He says shit like "I have things I want to do before I die." Cool then actually get a fucking job you dumb ass, so you can be with me and do your dreams.
I am under the conclusion that he never gave a shit. I am suffering just trying to function like a normal adult in public. GOD IT BURNS, that's why I know it will kill me if I don't fight it. I know it will kill him as well, if he doesn't attempt to overcome it.
It's not fair that I am the only one struggling to force myself outside each day.
No. 1651827
>>1651820Same
nonnie, thank you for the care, I appreciate it.
No. 1651867
>>1651862few more sites worth looking into are
www.workaway.info
www.helpx.net
Always do your research into the hosts and site itself, things change overtime.
No. 1651997
I never felt like this about starting a new diet, this isn’t exactly negative but it isn’t positive either. Maybe it’s this constant headache I’ve been feeling these past weeks, but I feel like this nutritionist explained to me some shit that makes sense? All of my life, ever since I was like 13 years old, I was told that all that’s happening to me is my fault and that I just needed to be more serious, and I am, I’ve been sticking to different diets and lost some weight, but then I gained it again.
And I always thought it was entirely my fault because, maybe if I just worked out while sick I would manage to fulfill my quotas and such, or maybe because I couldn’t workout because of my period I could just not eat for the day.
And that’s not what works after all, in the end my problem is that I actually have hormonal issues, that I actually need the Liraglutide, not because I’m fat, but because being fat is a symptom that comes with my hormonal issues, because it helps with the insulin that my body isn’t managing properly.
I really hope that this new change of habits works, mostly because I’m worried about not being healthy, I just don’t want to be unhealthy anymore, I’m sick of this constant worrying and always being told “yeah, just lose weight” like I’m not even trying, like yeah, I’m trying, but I’m here because of a pneumonia, not because I’m fat.
No. 1652070
>>1652060That would have been a great idea but the leftovers are 4 days old now sadly. Thanks anon
>>1652063Yeah…. It's called "skinny spinach lasagna"
No. 1652116
>>1652098Yea, I am such a cow. I live in utter social isolation. I was abused my whole childhood and born In poverty, most people reject me and harass me for no actual justifiable reason. I am a cow because I am aware of complex social issues that affect society and because I am suicidal and because literally almost all people inflict irreparable mental damage onto me and people have never been aware of my situation and nobody has ever cared about my wants an needs. I am a cow absolutely. Women that have been abused their entire lives and are being bullied by society for being weird are COWS just like me. Sorry for venting about the abuse I have endured at the hands of my parents, people on the internet and people in real life. I am a cow.
This place is litelly filled with BPD Chans that are obsessed with harassing and stalking other people (especially women) and other women with regina George bullying complexes that take it out on anyone that is vulnerable because they weren't cool enough in high school. This place is vile just like the rest of society and I don't think there will be a place where I will have peace because something about me makes me into a scapegoat or it literally causes people to bully me and literally lie about me everywhere I fucking go and have no. Empathy or actual real considertion.
The "radfems" In action. How the fuck do you not want me to insult you when you insult me? I am so fucking tired of all the BPDs and their endless fucking abuse and the lack of care and love from all fucking people and empathy.
My whole life I have had to listen to the problems of other people and people whine all the fucking time and you have to offer them constant empathy and make them feel "
valid" my whole life I have had to repress my problems because they are "too much" my whole life I have had to keep quiet. Simply, I have never witnessed anyone be harassed for being mentally ill and abused or being in a bad life situation.
"get a job" that's everything I will ever get. Sorry, I am such a huge cow but all the fuckimg people with horrible mental fucking issues that are part of society and people coddle them and offer them support are not Cows. I guess it only applies if life actually weakens you. It is only ok as long as you don't get caught.
>>1652111Fix yourself first.
No. 1652118
File: 1691010928594.gif (2.15 MB, 320x430, tumblr_2374461b115b19c979c91a1…)
>>1652116im not reading all of dat
No. 1652121
You all complain about how shitty your lives are, how your parents abused you, how shitty your siblings are, how shitty your jobs are, how shitty your friends are and you pat each other on the back even if you are in situations of relative privilege but God fobid I complain about my cursed and abusive life because then I am a cow and I need to off myself and I am trauma dumping and just get a job. "get a job" "sad" "you are insane" the level of gaslighthing I have received over things that are actually justifiable is fucking insane.
This place is full of rich NEETs that have never have had problems in their lifes. Ex /r9k/ whores that shared their nudes with scrotes simply because they wanted attention, BPD Chans, insane fucking women with mental complexes because they weren't cool enough. Women that literally fuck their scrotes in the ass and lick their assholes. This place is full of COWS look at the posts in the Cow yourself thread. But just as society goes some people don't get held responsible or harassed for their actions while others are just persecuted. 80% of the user base of this board is women that are cows. Radfems my ass. Most of you are LARPING.
My whole life I had to walk on eggshells around others and make sure they feel valid and That I don't make them uncomfortable while everyone has crushed me. I have never been allowed to talk about my problems, my feelings, my situation.
There is a reason to why I am not leaving. That is because I get harassed, ignored, blamed, rejected everywhere and I got used to this place but the vast majority of the user base is just vile. I am not talking in the name of everyone but I cannot stand being treated this way anymore and if you go over it, my arguments make complete sense. You are literally mentally abusing me, gaslighting me.
All the posters in the Shayna thread in the Luna thread in the Venus thread in Lucinda's thread are cows themselves. This is the kind of user base this place attracts probably only 20% of women here are actually OK. You call me a Cow but the things That I say make sense and are reasonable while yours lack empathy or basic understanding over human psychology. I live in a society of sociopaths the average person is incredibly twisted.
No. 1652138
>>1652130A lot of the lurkers and posters On lolcow surprisingly are PUBLIC Figures or have done weird fucking shit on the internet but again we live in a society where some people get called out and others don't. I have never posted my face on lolcow. It all started when I was in a discord server from lolcow and it was full of drama and pettiness and I felt mistreated so I left and I started posting about how I think lolcow "radfems" are hypocrites and just simply suffer from cognitive dissonance and I have been getting horribly harassed since then and people are stalking me on the internet. All posters in Shayna's thread are sex workers and cowish themselves and they have online presence. Luna's thread is full of ex Tumblr art chan fags That also had an internet presence and they were jealous of Luna for having a lager internet presence. 90% of online figures or people that post their shit online are COWISH and hypocritical themselves but again we live in a society where only certain people get harassed/persecuted while others get away with shit 100 times worse.
90% of the internet celebrities and public figured are just super cowish people with skeletons in the closet and I tell you a shitload of ppl on lolcow have sketchy internet presence. A lot of it is Schadenfreude or just the twisted nature of human beings.
No. 1652142
>>1651649Thank you so much
nonnie! ♥
No. 1652152
File: 1691015067887.png (318.41 KB, 564x723, pngwing.com.png)
My family shifted to a new house and moving all the furniture alone got my arms and legs screaming for help. I'll never understand why my parents think I'm strong just because I'm tall. I'm weak as fuck and carrying this shit hurts. Feels like a bus went over me, and to make the matters worse, I can't even have some peace and quiet because there's an old fart who lives next door and he's so annoying I wish he'd just die. Fucker can't shut up for a minute and is always nagging at the neighbourhood kids — mainly at the young girls who aren't even making much noise, it's like he hopes for them to lock themselves inside their house or something. I wanted to wake up to the sound of birds but instead I wake up to his grumpyass screaming like a bitch. I hope he drinks tea because I'll fucking poison it.
No. 1652200
File: 1691020693613.gif (935.85 KB, 160x263, image0.gif)
>>1652138Hey romanianon!
Wanna take a girls trip to Los Angeles and break into a $26 million house? Everyone else welcome to bandwagon, the more of us there are, the harder it is for all of us to get caught! And the faster we can find the trapdoors that lead to the catacombs beneath his heinous mirror bathroom
No. 1652231
>>1651483I know that's the best thing to do but I have a shitty memory and want to keep them to see the exact words we used.
>>1651510Yeah, I do the same. I have other friends who are way better than him but I think the reason that I'm still not over it is because I'm not a social person and tend to get lonely a lot so I go back to thinking about the friendships I have lost as a result of my cold and somewhat distant behaviour but that's a whole other thing.
It started with me noticing that we were not talking as much as we used to when we first met so I asked him about it. He said that he hadn't noticed it before and the reason why we didn't talk as much as we used to was that he had other friends now so he didn't need that much affection from me because he was not needy anymore but he said that I was still his best friend. Genuinely made me lose my mind at that moment like wtf is that. To me it meant that he was talking to me only because he had nobody and I was the only one giving him attention. I felt like the second choice and I told him but he kept denying and got mad at me so we stopped talking.
No. 1652242
>>1652121This anon Romanianon was a ex-whore who used to be a camgirl and would gossip about other camgirls and even posted false rumors about some Ukraine cam girl she hated and wanted her life destroyed. If you really are romanianon, then you are the problem. You are all the bad things you accuse others of being, you call out others for being "regina" yet when you do it to other women then that's okay, you call others whores yet you were a actual whore, you talk about your high iq yet all your posts sound like schizophrenic mumbles, you call others bpd yet you have mental breakdowns regularly.
You're a literal covert self-pitying narcissist.
You have hurted actual children and even animals and admitted to that. You are a whore,killer and a molester
No. 1652249
File: 1691025377498.jpg (9.8 KB, 236x233, 59d6615bfb3e7f3b87b920ce3c249d…)
I will never be beautiful because of my big nose. My big nose is what stops me from being a stacy
No. 1652293
File: 1691028465083.jpg (65.28 KB, 911x865, 1689533001172.jpg)
>Be somewhat known in niche subsection of a fandom
>My paranoia, self loathing, a delusional epiphany, inability to connect with others, lowing mental health, intense shame brought on by my religious background and poor self esteem culminated into an episode that led me to burn bridges with all online semi-niche fandom acquaintances and friends, write an extremely incoherent email to one of my closer online friends before deleting any and all of my presence online and going completely MIA.
>Now even more lonely and isolated than I was before.
>Now have nobody to talk to about my niche interest anymore as I am too ashamed to return.
Why am I so retarded and why can't I be normal? To be honest, maybe this was a good thing. I'm going to give myself three years to get better before I go back to having a presence online and getting into fandoms again.
No. 1652297
>>1652293WTF are you me? This is basically my story. I think there's still a chance they remember and miss you. I was surprised when browsing a certain forum and seeing that a few people mentioned my name like a month ago, even though I stopped interacting with them in 2020. I felt like an asshole, I thought they forgot about me
I sympathize with the desire to get better before going back. Good luck anon!
No. 1652300
File: 1691029141610.png (210.64 KB, 496x269, help.png)
>house is shit, want to move
>one year left of undergrad, classes are gonna suck but at least it will be over
>had to leave old job, girl who replaced me got put on a $3k salary after working there a year, double what i got after working for 4 years
>rejected from temp job from place i want to work at
>sexless
>questioning my life
it could be worse i suppose
No. 1652323
File: 1691031007003.jpg (14.52 KB, 360x352, 632.jpg)
when i talk about what my family is like online people are like "wow that's fucked up" "you should leave them" "they're abusive" but when i address those things to them irl they (especially my parents) say that i'm spoiled, that i don't realize how lucky i have it, that i'm being too negative and dramatic, and that my life is better than most people's. i don't know who to believe.
they did sort of physically abuse me when i was very little but it was so quick and long ago that it feels like a footnote in my life more than anything, plus they often bought me lots of toys and basically anything i wanted. even in adulthood they still pay for some things and take care of me. but even besides the brief physical childhood abuse, there was poor emotional treatment, being overly rude and generally flipping their shit and throwing fits/tantrums towards a child overall. i never figured out what made them so angry but they strangely mellowed out as i got older.
tbh i would pretty much agree with what other people said about them being shitty if it weren't for the buying everything for me part and letting me stay at home and helping me with tasks in adulthood. it's like my parents had split personalities or something. i felt like they treated me terribly and spoiled me a lot at the same time, is that even possible? to be both privileged and abused. i made a post in the "cow yourself" thread that went into more detail (before realizing it wasn't even milky) but i won't link which one
No. 1652326
File: 1691031125941.jpg (10.26 KB, 474x331, maruchan.jpg)
i only have a few days left to turn this in and im far from done. what i have written so far is an incomprehensible mess so editing it is a pain. and there are so many spelling errors and grammatical mistakes and i cant spell to save my life so im not gonna catch any of them but its too late to ask someone to edit it for me. i also need to write two more pages.
its 5am and i have been staring at this for days with minimal sleep and i havent achieved anything. fuck my life
No. 1652347
>>1652323Nah nona it definitely sounds like they were
abusive especially considering how much of this happened during your childhood. It's not okay to do that to a child. Them buying you material things is a clear excuse for them to pardon their poor treatment of their child. In the end, belongings won't give you back the love they robbed you of. My parents went into debt trying to overcompensate for their loveless marriage and
abusive and neglectful treatment of their children thinking greed would fix it. It never does. That type of behavior also doesn't help you cultivate proper skills and echoes in the remainder of your life and relationships. The toys, the gadgets, doesn't mean anything. I'd rather have had poorer parents who lived within their means and loved me than ones who cosplayed as rich and were incapable of caring for their children.
No. 1652366
>>1652242Not to be a grammar fag but you need to learn proper grammar. It is you have hurt. Not hurted.
Again, in my defense. I was an 8 year old child living in extreme third world country poverty, In a horrible environment. I was being raped constantly. I saw animals being tortured around me. How can you use this card against an 8 year old traumatized child???? I just don't understand how you can literally tell and abused, raped, beaten child that they hurt other children? I was literally being tortured. How can you fucking accuse an 8 year old girl of hurting children????? I was being abused too. Do you understand how poverty and extreme abuse works on the minds of children? Simply you are saying an 8 year old CHILD in horrible living situations was an ABUSER when I had my skin punctured with dirty needles by older kids, w had no toilet, I was raped daily by a 20 year old man, I saw animals killed in front of me. I was beaten with stones in my head until I lost counsciousness. How can you accuse an 8 year old child being surrounded by rape, poverty, abuse, lack of authority. How can you accuse an 8 year old girl surrounded by chaos of being an abuser? You're inflicting horrible abuse onto me right now…by using this against me it is also non sensical to accuse an abused child of being a rapist or whatever you are saying. Children living under extreme stress and that are surrounded by abuse replicate that abuse. You literally have no empathy or theory of mind. You are incapable of having empathy towards an abused 8 year old girl or you just don't understand human psychology. Simply, I don't know why my abuse or living conditions are ignored and why nobody has ever cared about my abuse. How can you demonized an 8 year old girl that was violently raped for 1 year? Do you understand how sexual abuse, poverty, a horrible environment acts on the psyche of a child? Simply it is like people lose common sense around me and accuse me of the most insane shit. The way you phrase it is like I am a 24 year old woman abusing children. You are quite literally slandering me and lying about me. How is an 8 year old little girl that is surrounded by chaos and replicates that chaos an abuser? You are just mentally torturing me and pushing me to the edge and offering me no empathy. I was a child too.
The woman I posted is a literal sex trafficker and you are acting like I posted her out of jealousy. There are women on lolcow that have posted their nudes to moids on /r9k/ because they wanted attention and they come from rich families. I was literally sex trafficked out of a mental hospital when I was 18 and pushed into sex work and drugged up and the woman I have posted was tied to the sex trafficking ring that sex trafficked me. Do you know Andrew Tate? He lives in Romania for a reason. He became a millionaire after trafficking women for his camming business. This is exactly what happened to me and the person that trafficked me was a woman.
How can you accuse an 8 year old child that is literally being relentlessly raped and has animals killed in front of them of being a child molester and an animal murderer???? Do YOU LACK BRAIN CELLS OR ACTUAL COMMON KNOWLEDGE.????HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU PERSECUTE A CHILD???? The way you phrased it is as if… I DID IT NOW AS A FUCKING Adult
You're literally lying with every little thing you are saying about me. You are relentlessly mentally abusing me and showing the incapacity to have empathy towards a person. I am not sure why people seem incapable of having common sense or empathy towards me.
Do you remember Steven? The man larping as a radfem in the friend finder that abused me and is now IN PRISON???? He is in prison for molesting an innocent woman and you all defended him and his abuse against me and dogpilled me and used the same retoric that I am a child molester and an animal killer like I am doing it now. I was an 8 year old child being abused. Have you ever heard of someone talking about how their traumatic childhood has caused them to he
abusive in their childhood and they get blamed for it? Who the fuck blames an abused 8 year old girl surrounded by chaos for acting according to their environment. You are literally inflicting horrible mental abuse onto me and reframing my reality. You will do anything in your powers to slander me, reshape my reality, lie about me, harass me, deny my abuse. You are purposefully baiting me and harassing me.
You literally ignored a 26 year old man that has been residing here and blending amongst you for 3 years that molested a woman and is now in jail. Do my words actually reach you or are you emotionally crippled?
No. 1652382
>>1652366Is things some bored larper?
Romanianon we all saw your unhinged post history compilation of the depraved insane shit you posted that contradicts multiple statements you made. So quit acting like a
victim, its too late for that. In fact someone needs to find those posts of yours again.
You are just like that Troon Blaine, you too have been permabanned yet tou keep on finding new ips to ban evade all the time. You have the time for this but not for a part time job.
You're a fucking loser, and I can see that my post had some truth to it considering it obviously struck a nerve in you.
Daily reminder that you only became anti-bullying once your pictures got posted here but before that you had no problem engaging with bullying and gossip of other women and camgirls. People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Pathological liar attention seeker with a failed twitch career. I'm reporting all of your posts by the way.
No. 1652400
>>1652392I sound like a cow?
Most anons here who have kept up with her since her Steven saga had enough of her shit.
She has been shown the most niceness and accommodation out of all the cows here , jannys allowed her to make threads about people she has problems with, they let her vent, took her side during Steven saga (and I was also one of the ones who defended her) and that still wasn't enough for her and she proceeded to spam this whole site, white manifestos and dates in when she was going to go and k!ll people, try to use us as her personal army to go against multiple cam girls she hated etc etc etc. And it all ended up in her getting perma-banned so now she ban evades.
She's also been caught lying and fabricating things multiple times. If you don't know who romanianon is then don't post whiteknighting a horrorcow.
No. 1652413
>>1652400I have been allowed here since the Steven saga???? ALLOWED??????? Steven is a moid that has been here for up to 5 years blending amongst you. There was actually a period of time where moids were allowed on lolcow before the radfem thing began. I was on lolcow way before the radfem thing began. I have been on lolcow for 7 years.
The way you Word it is like the Steven stuff is my fault and like I did a horrible thing. Dude, this man is in prison for molesting a woman on a jogging trail and he did it 6 months after I posted him on here because I felt he was fucked up. He has been here for 3-5 years and would constantly partake in threads and even talk with many other women. He groomed an autistic girl from lolcow and I tried to help her. This man has been a resident on lolcow for a long time. Yet, when I posted him you said
>why did you bring Steven here>You are a child molester and animal abuser.This man, 6 months after I posted him is in jail….. For RAPING A WOMAN. Yet, you keep saying I am a child abuser for being an 8 year old girl being abused and in an extremely bad living conditions. Of course I am going insane at your lies. You ignore everything that I say and reframe my reality.
>have kept up with her since the Steven sagaYea, the man that is now in jail… For molesting an innocent woman. You frame it like I did this weird thing for posting Steven a fucking narcissistic psychopathic moid that has been on lolcow for probably more than you have been. Even when I posted him you kept abusing me saying I am a child molester and that I brought him here. Which were lies.
Of course I am going insane after all the abuse and lies everyone has put me through and lack of actual empathy and common sense.
You keep repeating the same mantra that I am a child molester and animal torturer (untrue). That I brought Steven here. That I posted camgirls out of jealousy and no matter how hard I try to actually tell you the truth you ignore me and repeat the same insane shit about me. The mental abuse people have put me through is insane and I don't have where to go to vent or talk because everywhere I go I just don't recieve empathy and I end up being mentally abused by everyone. I am not sure why.
>>1652403I don't know. It might be possible. Right now I am being harassed by a handful of people in real life and on the internet. It is actually terrifying even normal people downplay my issues and harass me and usually what I say gets ignored all the time
No. 1652436
>>1652429>I think it has more to do with the fact that you want to monopolize every single conversation you ever have around Woe Is You. You don't want to talk about anything else, you want to talk about how pitiful and sad your life is, even to complete strangers, all of the time, round the clock.Like, when people accuse me of insane shit and I have to stand up for myself? Like when I am being told I am a jealous ex camwhore and a child molester and an animal murderer when I was sex trafficked at 18, when I was 8 I was being abused horribly. It is just how conversations work. When you are accused of something untrue you have to stand up for yourself. This is how conversations work.
Or like when I vent in the vent thread… Make it all about myself in the thread that is about… Stuff you are going through and you recognize my writing style and you go on another rampage where you tell the same lies and I have to say the same stuff? Or you have very unempathetic replies to my posts like "get a job". Anons that complain about their issues usually get actual empathetic replies I get told the worst shit… And then of course it is all my fault if I talk about it.
I'm actually incredibly people centered. I care for others and I care about social problems I understand complex social issues but yea… All people talk about their life. Most people get empathy. I just get… Harassed.
No. 1652535
File: 1691053348749.jpg (95.21 KB, 564x1002, 1e7e53f788719b9abbcb208d46742e…)
Okay, the new AC game has been dead for 3 years by now but I'm still very salty about it.
I grew up with AC, I spent my late childhood with my WW copy and ran that city for years, I never got bored because there was always something to do and someone to talk to. I enjoyed my villagers and always kept them from moving out (basically if I found out they were moving, I'd send a letter to them so they replied to me and stayed - stressful but nice.) and growing up painfully shy, that was my safe zone for a while.
NL was nice. I didn't like being "in charge" of things but nice game, I like it.
But oh boy how I fucking despise New Horizons.
New Horizon is just a cutesy minecraft, nothing happens (in fact the events are very irregular and that doesn't bring surprise, it brings frustration), the villagers are cute trophies to show off and I cannot count how many of my friends got frustrated with it and restarted their island due to them being "bored" of their current one when surprise surprise, it's the game that's shitty, not you.
New Horizons is nothing. No side stories, no dialogue, no development, no events. There, you have a island, do stuff lol. Nintendo hyped up so much the terraforming feature and that feature was the one who completely ruined the game, making people frustrated, easily bored, never satisfied and striped it down from its comfy personality. I don't want to build stuff, I want to play Animal Crossing to have my own little home and to talk with my animal friends, in the first games you used to join an already estabilished community and you had to work your way into being a good citizen (by talking to your animals) and could feel your progress and help (for example the Nooks expanding-in the new game they don't expand.), New Horizons is just like: get on a island, fetch some animals, put pinterest tier decorations around your home and there, done, the game is done.
If people need lists and motivation to boot up their games like picrel, it means that the game is pure shit and I hate to admit that. I hate that I got the switch only for AC and now it's collecting dust. I hate not having fun with a videogame.
"But nona, you're almost 30, it's normal, you're not a child anymore, it's normal to not enjoy games!"
No, it's not that. I can still enjoy my pre uhh let's say, 2012? Games?
The selling point of new games is either walking cinematic simulators or a hellhole of customization options that don't add anything to their games. For examples, I really enjoyed HiFiRush due to their charming characters, simple but fun gameplay and good (not the best but enjoyable) story. I loved that but that was the only game I really enjoyed in years.
Sorry for the rant I just hate seeing a hobby I had for so much of my life being turned into soulless but photorealistic corridors made by developers and writers who sniff their own farts and boring sandboxes that could cater only to autistic lego children.
No. 1652583
>>1652572You're talking bullshit about her. She was into neo-nazis yea but the central point of her spergs was how privileged westerners are although she said multiple times that she has family in America and she can immigrate there any time so obviously for a Muslim woman in the middle East she was incredibly privileged maybe even more privileged than some western anons on lolcow. Lolcow is so fucking annoying you literally just twist the information regarding anyone. Pakichan was super privileged.
>>1652568I confessed that I was brutally abused as a kid which conditioned me into horrible behavior that makes me dissociate when I think of it? I haven't committed any heinous act in my adulthood but I feel like the entire society is pushing me to do it through the harassment and gaslighting and lack of empathy. I am mentally ill like? A lot of women on lolcow? That post their trauma and about their mental illness and they don't get harassed for it.
Can you shut the fuck up? I have no friends in real life and nobody listens to me. Can I please have the privilege of using the vent thread without you immediately personality faggimg me and harassing me and then blaming me for spamming the thread when you are the ones literally arguing with me non stop and telling me I am a whore for being sex trafficked that I am a child diddler and molester that I brought Steven the resident moid of lolcow here. A man that is in JAIL now…. A man that groomed an underaged woman from lolcow that I protected. Do you remember when I warned you about Steven? Now he is in jail for sexual harassment but I still want to kill myself because of the mental abuse and the lies
(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE) No. 1652588
File: 1691062009036.png (111.61 KB, 468x468, E2D0C269-E55D-4301-920A-65AF94…)
> Goes on AO3 for some mindless x reader fics under a certain trope tag
> Sees the name of someone from my country currently under investigation for war crimes
>thinks it can’t seriously be a fic about him
>it is
>author is a minor he/they rats/ratself goblin uwu TIF with 15+ true crime fics about the fucking columbine shooters, dahmer, the Boston marathon bomber etc
I thought I’d seen it all anons… fucks sake
No. 1652605
>>165294Jesus fucking christ, nothing has made me want to a-log faster than that. That's not even TCC orientated, that's just disgusting.
I didn't think our zoomers were THAT brain rotted (I'm assuming the TiF is, because I doubt any non ausfag would have heard much about the case)
No. 1652606
>>1652583I literally saw her bash both black women and feminists in general, but I'm talking bullshit? Nope, fuck off. She's made vent posts about worrying about her family marrying her off, the fact that she brags about being able to immigrate to America means nothing to me because it just makes her a spoiled piece of shit who cryposts about how Pakistan sucks and no one can possibly be in pain in first world countries. She mocked women for losing their abortion rights and has been shitting up /2X/ too going on about how so and so feminist is a fat waste of air or whatever, and she admitted to doing so.
By the way, I'm not a westerner. My country is literally poorer and worse than yours, so don't try to lecture me on a thing. Th difference between me and paki is that I will never post retarded rants about where I live here because my life is not a fucking sideshow for burgers to gawk at, and I'll never turn against other women and simp for shitheaded moids. No matter how angry I get at tonedeaf white feminists or fake radfems on Lolcow and elsewhere, I'm not going to become a tradthot pickme moron who yells about fat women but worships fat (white) moids, bashes women of other races in hopes that Nazis pick me as "the exception", and I'll always look down on anyone who does those things. There's no excuse, dumbass.
No. 1652624
>>1652568none of them are endearing, they're just retards who can't shut up about themselves and try to bruteforce any kind of interaction. constant toddler tantrums. if they were endearing they'd at least feel bad about it and stop forcing their way into community by ban evading every time.
we had a lot of board cows over the time, one that comes to mind was one who did dd/lg camgirl and prostitution only to alog fellow prostitutes she was irl friends with on lolcow all day and tried to fake multiple suicides to blame us for them.
No. 1652656
>>1652648Yes, that does count as rape or sexual assault. I think in some places
legally it has to be a penis for it to become "rape" and a finger would be "sexual assault". In the USA that would be rape and in the UK it would be assault. I'm not a lawyer but that's how I understood it. Either way it's a serious crime.
I find it very hard to talk about trauma out loud and I usually have to write it down on a note and hand it to my therapist. Maybe that will work for you.
It may not lead to anything depending on how shit the cops are where you live but you should report him to the police, in case there's any chance they can prevent him from assaulting more women.
No. 1652664
File: 1691069024648.jpg (12.42 KB, 564x564, bd0d382bcaef6f0a2ce96ff812a0c1…)
My entire life I've struggled with "being late to success™" because my abusive brother would hammer on me, as young as 5, that I've been late to everything I wanna pursue. I know he's wrong and a fucking miod retard for projecting his failures on me but that shit marked me for life. Since I was a child I only wanted to make art, music and dancing, I never wanted to be famous™ or anything of the sort, pretty much just didn't want to end up on the streets. Now that I'm grown I have a normal job to pay the bills and I've been trying for some good 5+ years to make art regularly, to get better at it, so hopefully in the future I can live off of it. But still, that ghost is behind me, in my mind, feeding off my anxiety. I'm in my late 20s and still can't shake out the useless disturbing feelings of inadequacy because I'm not a super star millionaire artist known by everyone(even tho is not what I want from life at all). Everyone around me tells me over and over again it doesn't matter, and they're absolutely right, yet my brain either doesn't get the memo or doesn't want to. I'm so tired of this bullshit creeping into my mind all the time, how do I make it stop for good? which type of behaviour can I practice so my thoughts about it will stop?
No. 1652670
File: 1691069769043.jpeg (54.3 KB, 1170x1170, ᑉ³.jpeg)
>bought a new pillow online
>reviews praised it as if it's the second coming of jesus but in a pillow form
>the pillow is too fucking thin, I can literally feel the mattress under it
No. 1652696
>>1652684>I'm also a diagnosed autist but we are just so differentfemale socialization, anon
>if I don't tell him to do it, he won'tweaponized incompetence
>I couldn't move out because no one takes care of him but mewhere the hell are your parents? he's not your son, what the fuck. get the fuck out immediately and don't look back. cut off all contact with those parasites. you're your own person and deserve to live for yourself
amazing that it doesn't matter if he's autistic, he's still a man through and through. hate this clown world, you deserve better anon
No. 1652709
i’m
>>1652648 and i wanted to say thank you so much to the supportive nonas. i wanted to let you know i’ve reported this monster to the police now.
No. 1652710
>>1652625Truly
victims of their own design. Whenever I start to get mad at them, I remember that they are miserable irl and I kek.
No. 1652718
>>1652701that sounds terrible. they're terrible for leaving him with you and living the things you should be living, not them.
baby steps, anon, you will claw your way out of this. picture this: not very far from now, you will be looking at the ceiling on your shiny new place and thinking about how much has changed and how glad you are to finally be living your life.
think about what you can do every day to bring you one step closer to this… any further now and you'd probably end up feeling overwhelmed.
if they have enough money to spend months on another place, they have enough money to hire help. even a nanny, or someone to help you clean once a week - remember that you hold all the power on this situation, because they know that if you walk away, they'll have to face their failure and that's the last thing they want.
you already know that you have to get out. that's a big step. rooting for you. take care
No. 1652724
>>1652709wow. I'm glad you were able to do that I hope he gets in serious trouble and you get the support you deserve. he is a monster.
when it gets back to him he may call you a liar. it can help if you have people around you who know the truth, find them now to protect yourself and help support you.
No. 1652854
>>1652701if your parents leave for months at a time call child services or something what the fuck. no wonder the kid is glued to his screens, he can't rely on your parents at all.
not to scare you excessively, but adam lanza was a retard completely dependent on his parents whose family planned on moving soon which contributed to him committing the sandy hook shooting. someone needs to reach that kid because if your parents won't take care of him, he is going to be fucked when he's older.
No. 1652930
>>1652854I mean they leave him with an adult (me) so I doubt CPS would give a fuck, but that's the exact sort of thing that scares me. I've heard this story before. I try to compensate by giving him a lot of attention, but I'm not his mom and so I don't have as much credibility. Like if I try to take away his screens he just shouts I'm not his mom. It just feels like a recipe for disaster–what good has ever come from an autistic isolated boy being raised by YouTube? I try to take him outside a lot, because I feel like if he goes out, he'll see other people and learn how to integrate better, but he never wants to go and I have to practically force him. He doesn't even like to play with his friends, and my mom retardedly pulled him out of public school so now he's being "homeschooled" (it's an absolute joke tbh.) I'm also constantly checking his browser history because I'm so fucking paranoid he's gonna end up on 4chan or something, but it's literally all gamer YouTubers and Roblox wiki shit. At least for now. My parents do not take my fears about online radicalization seriously and think I'm overreacting because "he has a good heart." It's also why I've been so reluctant to leave even though I'm well into my 20s now, I just feel like something bad is going to happen, but I'm also an anxious person in general. I just keep thinking if I love him as much as I can, keep trying, and teach him how to do household stuff like laundry and cleaning, maybe he won't be so maladjusted. But it's hard, he's about to be a teenager now…
No. 1652979
>>1652930why the fuck is he not in school? this of all things is the biggest problem. get him into school whatever way you can.
you need to move out to force them to better take care of him. you are his sister and he clearly doesn't respect you as an authority.
chris chan probably didn't seem irrevocably evil before, but he ended up raping his mother. i'm glad you take the risk of radicalization and what he does online seriously. he clearly has an internet addiction, there exist programs for that and maybe something like that can help him. does he understand how terrible your parents are and what it takes to survive?
No. 1653013
>>1652854My parents give him whatever he wants (except attention) and he begged not go anymore and said he can't get along with other children. He vehemently denies being bullied and his teachers also say he wasn't bullied, just a loner. I don't think he'd be so internet addicted if my parents spent more time with him, I think he feels abandoned by them (and maybe that's why he wanted to be homeschooled, for more chances to spend time with them?)
He idol worships our father (who is never ever around and is a genuine piece of shit) and lashes out at our mother (who used to spend a lot of time with him but has drifted as he's gotten older). But I think part of the issue is my father undermines us both constantly. I say he needs less screen time, he puts a high end computer in his room and starts talking about getting him a phone. I say he needs to do more chores to become more responsible, my father lets him off the hook and says that's girl stuff. My mother says they should bring him on trips, my father get furious and accuses her of sabotaging their plans because the trips are to "work on their marriage, not entertain a child." My father can't even remember how old he is and knows nothing about him, and doesn't seem interested in finding out.
I think my moving out would cause a lot of things to collapse because the house would go to absolute shit, my brother's education and grooming would stop, and all the cracks in their marriage would be obvious, but at least they couldn't deny the problem anymore. So I guess it's just what needs to happen. It feels wrong to do something I know will cause so many problems, but something has to give.
TLDR I think you are all right, moving out is the best thing, as counterintuitive as it feels.
No. 1653024
>>1653013Samefag, meant to reply to
>>1652979 and can't delete my post for some reason, my bad.
No. 1653094
>>1653013>I think my moving out would cause a lot of things to collapse because the house would go to absolute shit, my brother's education and grooming would stop, and all the cracks in their marriage would be obvious, but at least they couldn't deny the problem anymore. So I guess it's just what needs to happen. It feels wrong to do something I know will cause so many problems, but something has to give. Your brother (like all men) has received male socialization that men are to be respected as authority figures and not women. Even autists pick that up. He wants your father's love but your dad doesn't care about him. At 13 it's probably too young to make that clear to him. I don't have much more advice except to see if you can find more specific support services or forums like on reddit, and start tracking/taking notes of how your parents neglect your brother. How autistic or intellectually disabled is he? Do you think he could hold a job ever or will he need to go on benefits?
Moving out is a move with risks, but seems like the main way to get your parents to seriously raise him. How is he doing school wise? Can you call child services if he isn't actually learning anything while being "homeschooled"?
No. 1653348
File: 1691123645105.jpg (38.09 KB, 735x704, 71760865d92244734f202c68b898f7…)
I made a very stupid mistake and I think I'll get fired. If I can't even keep a simple job like that, what the fuck am I supposed to do with my life?
No. 1653437
>>1653138hey nonna, you are getting clean for yourself, so you can get a second chance at life. don't stop and don't give in. is fucking hard
I used to do heroin and it took me almost 2 years to get fully clean but is all worth it, don't give up.
No. 1653440
File: 1691133466248.jpg (12.58 KB, 300x250, axNnqxoR_700w_0.jpg)
>friend always comes to me for rants, advice and help
>"Sorry for always coming to you with these things, anon. I don't mean to burden you with my shit"
>It's okay friend, I love you and I love to help
>Really struggling one evening and decide to write to her for support
>No response for two days now
>Not even left on read
No. 1653492
>>1653437Thanks
nonnie, and congrats on your sobriety! I'm not going to blame everyone around me but the first few days everyone treats you like a princess, then it's 'get off your ass already'. I started when I was still a teenager so I feel like I never fully developed a personality and some core values got lost. When you're tranquilized 24/7 it's easy to go along with people's shit but now that I'm not out of it it's hard not to be annoyed by everyone. Probably a side effect but I feel down in the dumps already, I just try to go to sleep when I get thoughts like these but now sleeping is the only way I can avoid life. This is going nowhere, I got through the worst of it with being sick and bla blah but the after effects aren't fun either. At least I have a good psychologist, sucks she's on vacation right when I need her.
>>1653440Sorry about that
nonnie, that really sucks. You've been a good friend and you deserve the same in return, I'd just send her a message asking why she's not responding. She has to text you back someday.
No. 1653516
>>1653494I'm so sorry
nonnie, that hurts to hear. I hope she can treat it and recovers from it.
No. 1653559
>>1652602Pakichan stop posting about yourself. You said you wanted to be a cook and a sexslave for a nazi and that white women don't deserve rights to abortion. Romanianon is a mentally ill woman who isn't nearly as bad as you.
You pretended to be a black woman for a year to be racist, that's schizo shit.
You hate white, black Muslim and Jewish women and think they deserve no rights. You're literally the worst namefag to this day.
No. 1653565
File: 1691149051899.jpeg (86.75 KB, 950x964, IMG_1015.jpeg)
I’m visiting relatives right now and its made me suicidal. My uncle silently stared at my boobs for than 30 seconds in the middle of our conversation and then asked me if I had a boyfriend. I feel so fucking violated. I want to go home and never talk to these people again.
No. 1653685
File: 1691159055506.png (70.49 KB, 179x275, 1665329539287.png)
I'm going to kms because my butch girlfriend said she's thinks she's FTM trans
There's literally nothing I can do to convince her otherwise. I love her so much I would even deal with enby, but her turbo level mommy trauma has her disgusted with the idea of being female. She's getting the titchop too. If i don't kms before she goes through with it, having to call her he/him or "my boyfriend" is going to give me a stroke and kill me
I've tried every talking point with her, internalised misogyny, escaping female socialization, mommy issues, feminism, everything. She understands, but doesn't think any of it applies to her. This is the end nonnas. Its over for me
No. 1653719
>>1653692Without giving too much away, personally it would fuck up a lot of my life and make it hard to get back on my feet while I'm already juggling a lot. Emotionally, I seriously love her more than anyone I've ever met and she's basically my best friend. I know I make her sound like a potential nightmare but other than the trans shit she is the nicest, most patient and kind and giving person I know. My family love her and so do all my friends
It wouldn't be a messy breakup, but a really difficult one because neither of us want to break up but if she goes through with this ftm thing we have to
Feels like a nightmare kek
No. 1653784
File: 1691166623140.jpg (55.64 KB, 732x732, lkmjnhbg.jpg)
>"teehee just face it fellow foids all men are pedophiles and you just need to accept it. just look at this unsourced graph/screenshot with no link to the original source, but when you reverse image search it, it's been reposted on 48 incel sites"
>"you actually bothered to look up what i posted and even pointed out it's completely made up? uhh, uhhhh, you sound like a scrote, you are actually defending pedophiles sweaty!!"
>doesn't understanding how posting on imageboards works
>spams racebait about black women at the same time he starts making antagonistic posts
>didn't even bother to read the last thread to understand references to it, but insists he's not a newfag scrote
I really wish all the retarded men who come here to try and "fit in" and shill their own agendas would kill themselves. I know it was probably the schizo troon from months ago attention whoring, since whoever it was accused me of being him, but it really doesn't change shit. They swear that they're smart, but they're so obvious every single time.
It's literally always pedophile moids and clinically retarded pickmes who are obsessed with convincing women that it's "biologically hardwired" for men to be pedophilic, or that children are somehow "sensuous", or that middle school girls actually definitely want to sleep with their old ugly middle aged headasses, and the shit makes my skin crawl. Tardwives and "hyper-progressives" (like that one sci-fi novelist woman) who help their shitstain husbands groom and rape children do it, too. Nothing new about it. Had what they posted as "proof" actually been true, I might've believed it, because very little about men surprises me anymore, but it's not, it's just the same rehashed nonsense from their MRA groups, and they feel attacked at having it called out because this isn't about the truth, or about opening women's eyes, but their own disgusting copes that they live by. They don't care that posting and disseminating verifiably fake bullshit makes radfems look retarded, weakens any arguments used in the face of libfem bullshit and shits up the movement as a whole because they are not radfems or even women.
This was my experience with the so-called "blackpill feminists", too. They'd pride themselves on being "different" from other women because they "understand men's nature", they'd go around calling women "cocksuckers", laugh at them being raped, boast about being friendly with men, ally themselves with gay pedo scrotes and eventually some of them would happily post about being pedos themselves with rape and abuse fantasies for other women and young girls. I don't entirely believe most of them are or were women, the only ones I ever saw verify that they were (through voice, or they were already YouTubers or something) weren't the edgy pedo posters simping for male friendship. Idk I'm on a tangent, I need to take a nap.
No. 1653803
>>1653784Do you give blowjobs
>>1653801How if it's women who are actually the ones sucking their dicks and bragging about it online daily
No. 1653807
>>1653801No that post is unfortunately from the hidden feminist board 2X which recently got invaded by newfags who have been writing much worse stuff than the one I linked(women deserving rape, our biology making us subhuman incubators, paragraphs of oral sex porn etc), I chose that one because it's funny and shows the moids obsession with black men.
Most stuff I mentioned happened in 2X, some in tradthots thread, some in /ot/, etc.
No. 1653816
>>1653812At least not in the mouth like most women do
>>1653813Thank you blackpill Queen for admitting that sex is violence. The job is done.
No. 1653822
>>1653807These men are depraved beyond repair.
>>1653814 Just because the women in your family do that doesn't mean it's universal. I see more women complain about unsolicited dick pics than them bragging about oral sex. Actually most women don't even enjoy it and only do it out of pressure from their bfs/husbands.
No. 1653864
File: 1691170748426.gif (482.36 KB, 400x400, 498393919_487958.gif)
>>1653851sorry to hear that nonners
No. 1653872
File: 1691171212743.jpg (1.2 MB, 2500x1406, 1690488468648.jpg)
But is sucking cock so awful? I'm a virgin so I'm kinda out of the loop, does it taste bad? I suppose it should feel arousing if you're into dicks I guess?
No. 1653883
>>1653872That's a gay moid or blaine who's using that specific sexual act he has a fetish for to explain why he sees women inferior, don't take it seriously.
>>1653873His mother probably wishes she had swallowed that instead given her son is a pedophile who thinks hes a woman.
No. 1653906
>>1653905Srsly call the fbi on this guy.
https://tips.fbi.gov/home You can give an anonymous tip to them online.. if he owns CP he should be locked up asap.
No. 1653914
>>1653685Nona, this has happened to me three times. She may come around someday, but it's the sort of thing she'll have to realize herself. I know it hurts, but if this is a bridge you can't cross with her, it's best for you both that you leave now. If you do stay, be prepared for tension that will simmer in perpetuity; it will be the elephant in the room. If you do put up with it, she'll be able to tell your heart isn't in it, and it will hurt her, and that will hurt you. You'll second guess your beliefs, try really hard to twist yourself into pretzels to see it her way, and when you can't, you'll just be left wondering what the hell is left to be done. It's really sad and heartbreaking, especially when you know exactly why she's doing it, but there might not be much more you can do. The longest I stuck it out with someone like this was a year, but she surrounded herself with like-minded people who made her change from someone empathetic and kind into someone I couldn't recognize. Good luck no matter what you decide, I know how hard it is when someone you love, truly love, is hurting themselves like this and there's nothing you can say to make them see it for what it is.
No. 1653923
>>1653880Germans are still prudish, prostitution is just a business that makes some people rich and who doesn't like money in a capitalistic society. I would love for it to be prohibited here, but I guess it will never be the case.
>>1653892Most of the comments just show that the scrotes are looking for very young, unwilling women and see them as a product they bought. After the war in Ukraine started there were a lot of comments that they now get new "meat", something else than the "boring" Romanian, Polish or German girls, I couldn't read all of them as I try to save some of my own mental health. Germany even changed laws to make it "saver" for the prostitutes, according to the politicians, it did nothing. We have young girls that will be groomed into prostitution by adult Arabic guys, but as prostitution is legal if you are older than 18 and those girls "love" the guy, how will you tell that it's forced prostitution?
Some feminists are fighting against it, trying to get the Nordic model here, but there are a lot of women talking about how liberating it is and that it's the choice of the women, just the regular blabla you would hear from your next onlyfans whore. I live close to street prostitution and the most women I saw so far are not older than 25, mostly from Eastern Europe and they don't look like it's so liberating for them to stand next to the streets for hours, having to get into a car with a guy they don't know. I also saw "women" that looked more like 16, so I would say that not everything is legal here and many women suffer. Some months ago they raided a Thai massage spa and guess what it really was, a brothel, why do you even need an illegal brothel if it's legally allowed to have one, probably not because the women worked there against their will…
No. 1653936
>>1653685did she live as a guy for some time before even doing any irreversible damage to her body? Is she in therapy and not with a therapist that supports all that trans shit or sees it as a solution for body dysmorphia, anorexia or other disorders. Have you showed her the horrible ruined bodies of women getting their breasts cut of or the stories of women regretting what they did, with all the physical consequences they have to suffer until the rest of their lives. If she is disgusted of being female there has to be something wrong and if this happend only very recently, there is no way that she always believed she is a man.
I hope she will change her mind some time soon, you really seem to love her very much.
No. 1653955
>>1653937they didn't mean the sex workers, they meant the regular women finding refugee here. They just hoped that the women would be so desperate for money (bullshit, because they get support here) that they would have to work as prostitutes. Not that men would care if they had diseases, the prostitutes working behind the central train station in my city most likely have one or more STDs.
>>1653945prostitution is mainly about power, if it would be about sex, they could find women in clubs or on tinder, but they want the power and the knowledge that they have bought the women and can do whatever they want to them. And I agree, who needs very rich people, they do nothing to help anyone and still cry that their lives are horrible and hard.
No. 1653980
File: 1691177311710.png (73.21 KB, 621x273, D76E54D7-8A63-4569-9913-7F4E12…)
I feel like I’m starting to give off a lot of weird 30 year old woman energy, I’ve noticed in a lot of places I go to the employees won’t engage with me at all compared to other people. It’s kind of awkward because I don’t mind being weird and independent, but sometimes not having friends and doing stuff by myself isn’t as enjoyable as my relatives assume.
No. 1654045
I hate that everyone blames me for how troubled I was as a teenager
I wasn't even that bad, but let's get into it
One of my worst years was probably 9th grade.
I was really not fitting into my school, which was filled with either hood bitches either white bitches, which I didn't fit in anybas a well raised mixed girl.
Anyway I was struggling to make friends and some hispanic bitch the teacher hates got interested in me. I was so desperate for friends and a sense of belonging I just went with it.
We would chat in class which this one PE teacher hated. He really hated me and categorized me as "evil". For example, one day I got detention for sharpening my pencil with a pair of scissors (??).
Anyway, that one day I was chatting with my new friend I was trying to win over, while the PE teacher was explaining some basketball rules, and he wasn't having it. He put us in separate corners, afar from the rest.
I ended up joining my friend in her corner. He got really mad when he realized and started yelling like crazy. Later that day, he went to the principle to get me kicked out of the class trip.
I think, even though I was out of the line, that this was way over the top of a punishment and he was really just venting out his deep seated hatred for me. This wasn't a pedagogic decision but just a petty revenge from an ego tripping teacher.
What I needed was not to be kicked out but a seeing with the school psychologist to tell me it's OK not to fit in and to stop talking to weirdos online.
Anyways, I was surrounded by adults that suck and that made my teenagehood suck even worse.
No. 1654063
File: 1691185433990.jpg (70.23 KB, 564x846, perch.jpg)
the past couple of months i have been overeating a lot, borderline binging. i thought i was cured because for a solid few months before that i was exercising regularly and sticking to my veganism. i was on a "starvation diet" of 800-900 calories but i never felt hungry, i was very happy and satisfied! my boyfriend would encourage me to eat more and worry for me and when i went to see him recently i pigged out really terribly. it was all vegan but more than i usually consume.
i have gained 4 pounds in the past 2 months and im really panicking. i had a childhood history of obesity and now i am a healthy weight but i wanted to lose 10-15 more pounds because i am short and even a couple of pounds shows terribly. im just at a loss. sometimes i even ruin my veganism to eat a junk food item…the only changes that have happened are starting school, being less active, and going onto an snri but i know it isnt the medicine because these problems were showing before i started it last month. i miss being neurotic about food and calories as fucked up as it is to say…i also consume less caffeine now. its like im so fucking relaxed and my boyfriend loves me so i feel comfortable and fine eating what i like.
im just panicking. i dont know if i should pathetically try to trigger myself with thinspo. ive tried to get more into being active again little by little and i guess it helps sometimes but not enough. i really shouldnt be making any excuses even if im bogged with work and school. i just need some sort of plan to work with and do the things i like.i guess i can figure it out. i feel like theres some underlying issue, but feeling bad about myself fuels me to eat more. i have very little control over it, but at least i have some. i used to smoke or exercise the stress away. im trying to get back into my hobbies which help but dont fix the problem. its like i need some dopamine sometimes, and i need something in my mouth or hands. there are plenty of times i eat just to eat…
luckily i dont eat to feeling sick but i eat past satisfaction. i just am so disappointed. i need to fix this and fast. i dont want to go on a starvation/restriction diet again, i think i might be eating exactly at maintenance or slightly above but anyway its still caused weight gain im so disappointed. while im the most stable and happy ive been, the overeating makes me unhappy and insecure often. maybe this is just the last step to balancing it all out? i even considered going on le ozempics lol but i know that wouldnt be good :( i think the only true and decent appetite suppressant is a little caffeine and consistent exercise i dont want to go into drug usage i already take a small vyvanse dose but i can eat through it most of the time since ive been onit for years…ahghgg fuck nonnies agghgh
No. 1654090
File: 1691187891022.jpg (31.16 KB, 283x320, 7777777.jpg)
sad n horny today
No. 1654114
File: 1691190029312.jpg (42.56 KB, 320x344, Tumblr_l_1148482157671939.jpg)
I wanna text him so bad, someone smack some sense into me
No. 1654117
>>1654114He's not worth your time
Better things and people are ahead
Keep yourself from talking to him for two months and meet new people, and if after that you still want to text, go ahead, but most likely you'll have forgotten him and realized how foolish it was to even waste a second with him
No. 1654132
File: 1691191680901.jpg (40.65 KB, 680x679, c22.jpg)
>>1654117>>1654119thank you nonnies, it was a moment on weakness but I'm staying strong, I've already showed him too much weakness lmao
No. 1654145
File: 1691192651427.jpg (6.17 KB, 275x163, 1679407984042.jpg)
Finally getting over being sick just to get my period a week early. I took some midol but it hasn't kicked in yet. Kill me, my cramps are horrible and I want to throw up.
No. 1654152
File: 1691193184887.jpg (46.73 KB, 212x275, 1636853864415.jpg)
lol everytime i try writting some huge ass vent here i end up deleting it all because im that avoidant lol it's just everytime i even try to get out my rut that ive trapped myself in, just even make the tiniest smidge of attempt, i get blocked! to live is to suffer, nonnies
No. 1654179
File: 1691194952514.jpeg (14.32 KB, 433x450, peter.jpeg)
met up with my cousin after a few years of not seeing him and he roasted me for having switch lite
>The only correct way to play switch is to have it on a big screen with friends
>I don't have company over, so I'm good with what I got
why are moids like this and why the fuck did I say that, I mean I don't have any friends near me and I fucking hate having anyone over ever but good god wth
No. 1654248
File: 1691199494887.jpg (Spoiler Image,128.36 KB, 1035x247, Screenshot_20230805-033457_Ope…)
I would gladly jump on the first opportunity to skin those disgusting troons alive. A bunch of filthy parasites infecting the world with their existece. Why the fuck would anyone put their degenerate fetish tags on display for every person in a fandom unfortunate enough to stumble onto this…
No. 1654252
You know, I think I'm pretty much done here, nonnas. I was born disabled (receiving tardbux) and my dad has told me point blank there's too much wrong with me to hold down a job. He was so fed up with me a while ago, he stuck me with a pos family member out of town who I basically had to take care of. And of course when I couldn't do it anymore, I couldn't afford ANYTHING but literal ghetto areas because of the economy. So here I am moving back in, and it turns out, he really HAS been a terror my entire life. I've been getting screamed at and even cussed out the month I've been here so far. He made his girlfriend cry when she witnessed one of the times it happened just half a week ago. Housing crisis means all the waitlists for housing are 3+ years. I've only gotten a response from one letting me know I'm on an "interest list". I don't have any time for myself to do the things that keep me going because my dad keeps using me like a manservant. If I complain, he starts having meltdowns about how I'm ungrateful and am living off of them for free (not true, he is going to get most of my benefits, even though it's not a lot). He wakes me up, I do comparatively heavy labor or clean, he talks and talks about what he's been doing, I try to talk to him and I'm told to leave him alone because he is busy, we come home and there's a few hours of downtime where he pops in and out of my room, I finally go to bed, I undersleep, he wakes me up, rinse and repeat.
I think I'm ready to tap out. I'm still in my 20s, but I haven't had a very good run so far, and I don't think I'm going to improve past here. My dad says I've "improved and matured" but what he means by that is I don't have autistic rage meltdowns from getting constantly attacked by him because I'm not a teenager anymore. Sometimes I'll feel a rage that it's ending like this, but I just console myself that I had a really bad start, like a video game or something, and try to calm down.
I'm not gonna do anything right away because I'm going to get a notarized will that says if my dad sells any of my stuff, 50% of it has to go to my best friend. I'll slowly send stuff to her like my hard drives and computer parts and laptops. She lives in another country with a poorer economy, so she'll be set up for a bit with the influx of money and things she can sell. I know she isn't a catfish, but I really wish she was because I don't want her to feel bad for me when it happens.
I'll keep using lc until I'm not kek, I'm just not telling anybody, so I figured I'd throw it into the vent thread kek. I do feel a lot better now. Just really sucks. Nobody thinks this is how it's going to go when you're a freshman in high school lmao
No. 1654260
File: 1691200779586.png (61.19 KB, 739x460, Screenshot 2023-08-04 at 22-01…)
>>1654248Oh this is honestly really common on AO3 because the site prides itself on little to no censorship. If you use AO3 regularly at all, I highly recommend downloading the AO3 Savior script (and the accompanying config script) to filter out tags. You need something like Tampermonkey to do it, but I refuse to browse AO3 without it.
No. 1654267
>>1654252Seconding other anon. If you're already being forced to do all this labor, you may as well just get a normal job. It'll help get you out of the house too, away from him, and then he can't bitch about you not helping. It'll also help you pass the time while you're trying to get your own place. You might lose your benefits once you start making a liveable income, and it's possible your dad will try to squirrel some of your money away, but it's gotta be better than dealing with what you've got right now. Many places legally have to accomodate your disability (they might not actually respect it, but still), so seriously, there is a way out of this. If transportation is a problem, see if you can find a carpool, public transportation, if there's any remote work you can do, even just Ubering there would probably be better.
No. 1654268
File: 1691201641248.jpeg (62.82 KB, 736x736, EB96CC44-26B4-4F61-B25B-1CD5E6…)
Goddamnit I scared myself thinking I was suffering some form of celiac disease or that my pancreas/liver was fucking on the brink of collapse and now after eating some soup im suddenly fine. Why the fuck did I suffer with bloating and lava lamp shits just for it to go away immediately after a day and a half of worrying. Thank god the one time I couldn’t go to the doctor and waste time/money this happens but I hate that whenever I get sick like this I feel I’m proving to everyone that I can’t even take care of myself and I’m a huge hypochondriac to boot
No. 1654271
File: 1691201899609.jpg (130.63 KB, 564x835, cinnamon.jpg)
i used to be very bubbly and kind. i was very positive. i had so many dreams and goals. i have learned too many lessons and now i speak up more and am more aware but cynical, negative, jaded, depression and anxiety play even bigger roles. is this just how life goes? will i ever return to how bubbly and positive i used to be? do you think adderall has made me even worse? ive been on it for a few years but i dont really feel like i became this way until a couple of years ago. and the adderall helped me very much with binge eating disorder as a child and to focus more but now im on the verge of abreakdown wondering if its what broke me? but before it i was pretty much the same, even worse id say. im medicated for my depression now..and n therapy…i feel flat but its better than suicidal. it hurts a lot. this is no way to live. i kept having hope again and dont know why nonnies. oh this feels awful. i used to be so witty and smart, so full of life. id always check in on everyone and chat chat chat. would not worry as muh about things. so much less stressed. school work? meh. sleep ? meh. so many dreams of what i could do. i loved to have fun with my hobbies. now i feel useless, confused, cynical. i cant allow myself to relax or do whati love most days because it isnt productive. oh this is a terrible feeling. im not even creative anymore. who am i? please
No. 1654292
File: 1691203071617.jpeg (60.36 KB, 600x786, IMG_0912.jpeg)
My dad fucking stinks. He’s been visiting and for four days he’s worn the same clothes and he’s only showered once. I have to tell him to brush his teeth like he’s a child. What the fuck is this? He’s only in his late 50s. Is this an early sign of senility? Am I supposed to just grin and bear it? Yeah I have a really sensitive nose but it’s been 110 degrees outside and we literally went to a zoo today and he smells like a goat. I’m totally floored. I’m not even that precious about hygiene like some anons are, I even half-agree with Grimes’ “you can wash your armpits in a sink” but holy fucking shit if you actually fucking stink you need to bathe. If you’re a guest in someone’s house you should probably fucking bathe. You should definitely no matter what be brushing your goddamn teeth. How do I even navigate this?
No. 1654293
>>1654259Sorry nonna, he's hovering. It took over an hour to write the last one.
I'm not scamming the gov or anything, I really am a pretty big retard. I have a lower threshold for emotional distress and can get snappy pretty easily, which is why my dad says I'd get fired from any places that hire me. As an example, I got really upset at the pharmacy because I had ordered my meds in 5 days early, and she was pretending they never got my call. My dad stepped in and apologized over my head a couple times and then scolded me in the car for being a dickhead.
I said "comparatively" because he knows I'm physically disabled as well (have a placard) but still has me doing stuff. Lately I've been helping him work on a house he's fixing, filling up trailers and then unloading them at a storage facility, putting together cabinets (one step above Ikea, I need a drill), and cleaning up all the shit he has in his house which includes moving a bunch of storage bins. I'm sure normal people can do this regularly, but I get to sit down when I like and we get breaks when we drive for like 20 minutes between locations. He also will sometimes jump on the computer for a few hours, so I get to try and nap for a bit. When I first came over, I was actually in a lot of pain to the point where I was having trouble sleeping, but I couldn't say anything because he gets mad at snaps about how he's "tired too" kek. I do have intake appointments for pain clinics and physical therapy this month and next month. So this isn't me just wallowing in misery. I'm just genuinely unsure what jobs I can do that won't end in tears and termination.
I wouldn't mind a filing job or something like that. I am such a huge autist I love organizing and filing and scanning and stupid bullshit like that. But I'm told you need experience and some sort of schooling, and there's a huge gap in my resume since I was on tardbux out of high school. I honestly feel trapped and doomed.
No. 1654309
>>1654267I think the thing that makes me nervous is I suffer from burnout really easily. I guess I'm scared of getting burnout, getting fired for being a shit tier retard worker, and then having that on my resume when I try to get another job.
Transportation is definitely not an issue. I have "my own" car, but it's under his name bc I'll get the shit kicked out of me in so many different ways if I report I own a car. He also bought it, but he has no problem with me using it however I want and we call it "mine". He's honestly pretty financially
abusive (meltdowns when I say I want to order takeout, drive unnecessarily, or upgrade the internet plan), but I tell myself he's just protective because I'm a neet tard who is living extremely below the poverty line. If he ever tries to stop me from using a car to get to a job, I will be surprised, and then call the cops on him.
Do you have any idea how I would find remote work? I've never done a job search and my dad pretty much gave up on me when he realized I was never going to college. He's convinced I'll end up in a group home in 20 years, but I think he says that to scare me into doing what he says. I don't know.
Thank you for helping me and responding btw,
>>1654259 as well I suppose, kek
No. 1654334
>>1654306Ugh. I really hope that's not true. I feel like it shouldn't be true because he always talked like I was going to get a job someday and "get better". "Grow out of it".
But I was also very naive about his abuse. I used to really excuse it and empathize with him. But after this month I've been with him, I'm realizing his anger only comes out with me and his gf, and he does make up excuses, and he rarely apologizes and always tries to pretend like it didn't happen.
I guess I just can't understand why he would try to make me codependent. I don't understand how that would benefit him, esp because he gets angry when I need more help than other people. Nobody wants a loser daughter leeching off of them for the rest of their lives. And he definitely doesn't need my benefits bc he makes enough money.
Something to think about I guess, thanks for bringing it up.
Also I am really sorry you had to work with a violent moid, that would be a terrible job to go into every morning.
No. 1654338
File: 1691206740193.jpg (5.45 KB, 184x184, images (3).jpg)
>mfw fwb and I hung out all night went out to eat drove around and he only kissed me sweetly a few times no sex and he talked about introducing me to his friends
Wait are we dating now
No. 1654361
File: 1691209132702.jpeg (32.98 KB, 678x452, IMG_3226.jpeg)
I have developed an all-consuming crush on a small time celebrity. It’s painful because it feels so hopeless but the delusion is the closest thing I’ve felt to being alive in years. How do nonnie stans do this?
No. 1654417
File: 1691210904389.jpg (57.4 KB, 717x468, lorh2fuhwcj71.jpg)
Havent gotten laid in 3 weeks. Moid ive been fucking is being a hermit. Im going to die
No. 1654449
>>1654309I don't want to make it sound it'll be easy, because it actually takes a lot of effort to get yourself started, but think of it this way: you are already getting burnt out by staying with your dad. You are already being yelled at and abused by some power tripping asshole. This is the worst case scenario, not you maybe being fired. Honestly, and I know it might be unethical–but just lean on the physical disability thing if they ask about the gap. You can make up a story if you need to. There's an expectation to lie anyways, so just say whatever you need to say to get in the door. I think an in-person job might be good for you, even just a simple sorting job. You can probably land an in-person file clerk position with just a high school diploma, but if not, there might be other entry level positions in your area that could work for you. As for remote positions, Linkedin is a good place to start for networking and even just seeing what's available.
I know it's really overwhelming, especially when you're starting from square one, but you seem like you don't want to live like this, and you shouldn't settle for it. This doesn't have to be your life, and even if you just set small goals ("by the end of 2023 I will have my resume complete and an account created"), it still gives you something to work for, something to look forward to. Don't get discouraged if you get ghosted, or even if you get fired. Just be proud that you're even trying because a lot of people don't even do that. I think whatever relationship you have with your Dad is fucking with your head and your sense of autonomy/agency. It will be hard, maybe really hard, but so is living with someone who treats you like shit, and you've survived that so far.
No. 1654552
File: 1691216327419.jpg (571.91 KB, 1080x1641, Screenshot_2023-08-05-08-17-09…)
>>1653806>The average woman isn't online bragging about that kind of shitMeanwhile women are being a dick hungry cum guzzling pigs
(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE) No. 1654563
>>1654552honestly fuck all of you. Historically, women have not been allowed to express sexuality or their sexual desires. They had to cover their bodies, were married to a man and could have sex only with one man and they would be burnt and called WHORES if they tried to have sex with another man.
Fuck this shit. Let women suck dick on the internet and be sexual and express sexuality.
No. 1654579
File: 1691217465081.jpg (49.82 KB, 750x979, Lost in the sauce.jpg)
I'm really overate today and I literally just ate an ice cream cone. I'm very discouraged but trying to remember that it wasn't one day of eating that made me fat, it was doing it consistently everyday for months and years. Tomorrow I start fresh again at 0 calories.
I feel like days like this always go the same for me. I do well with eating under my calorie limit for like half of the day, then late afternoon/night comes and I either go over my limit or do what might be considered a binge to some.
No. 1654635
>>1654334>>1654309Anon, trust me, you’re not to disabled or weird or anything to get a job, you’re dad is just gaslighting you. Definitely look for an irl job and not something that’ll keep you in the house. The more regular time you spend away from him the more freedom will slowly open up to you. Burn out and gaps on your cv are no big deal. You won’t get fired for being sensitive and zoomers are so flaky these days, employers have a lot more leeway for staff taking off days all the time. It may not seem so to you but your living situation is incredibly sympathetic and if you get burnt out or overwhelmed you will definitely be given time off. If you don’t care for a job, you can just leave and try another one. CVs don’t matter, they’re just letters to say hi to employers, at most you extrapolate whatever necessary skills you need from whatever you’ve already done, be it a 2 month job or a made up hobby. Did you say you like assembling IKEA furniture? You can sign up to TaskRabbit and have a go doing that for people. You sound like a bong, honestly speak to your GP about this and they will support you with a plan to work towards independence. Confidence, overcoming any difficulties with your disability, freedom and therapy for his abuse. Get an appointment and tell them you need help with your mental health in your living situation, write a list of your issues if you need to.
No. 1654655
>>1654644When it was scarily hot in here, I used to sit in front of an open fridge and drink salty water in tiny sips (1 tea spoon of salt per 1 liter).
>I really really don't want to go to the hospitalIt's your call, but please be careful and do go if you need to.
No. 1654698
File: 1691228935990.png (949.36 KB, 866x754, 169.png)
>>1654659sometimes I get the feeling that it's a female version of the "few millimeters of bone" incel thing. Like it's something to fixate and blame all of your problems on that's fundamentally unchangeable, which means that it doesn't demand any effort or lifestyle changes.
No. 1654761
>>1654659Blue eye obsession exists in two groups, ugly people whose only good feature is blue eyes or people who again believe blue eyes will save them from ugliness because they either have body dysmorphia or internilazed racism/racist beauty ideals.
Also a lot of men usually mention women with blue eyes and blonde hair to their gfs as their ideal type when they wanna make her jealous. Idk if this is common in other countries but it's common in mine especially if the man is nonwhite himself and knows he actually has no chance with those women as he's too ugly for them so he settles with a woman like himself.
No. 1654807
File: 1691244340846.gif (3.36 MB, 540x303, Hide.gif)
It's strange. I read so many posts of women talking about their ex boyfriends contacting them out of the blue after X amount of time, and my ex recently tried to add me on Steam. It's the only contact method he knows of mine. What for? Why do men this? It's bizarre to me. We dated over 5 years ago too.
No. 1654816
>>1654801Does he have an actual disability? How is he this gross and retarded? People with disabilities aren't even this gross and retarded.
People quit trying to marry your retarded/useless sons to women. It's sick
No. 1654957
File: 1691256057548.jpg (69.12 KB, 600x450, 21615138_600.jpg)
Fucking noisy neighbors, in their 40 looking like club druggies from 2000 with this stupid gelled hair.
Hope these brainless cretins fall off a balcony while drunk.
No. 1655043
File: 1691262204974.jpg (141.7 KB, 1438x1395, 0dc5f96863f77085188c29d0d9ebc4…)
First i have to wait 1 hour for the bus, then the bus is 10 min late, then the bus arrives is full of drunk teenagers who reeks of alcohol and wont stfu. Then one of the retard teenage boys burns something and now it reeks even more. im this close to murdering someone. And i still have 30 minutes til im home ughhhhhhhg
No. 1655104
>>1655047I'm not saying it hasn't always been bad, I mean I feel it's gotten way worse in recent dummy.
>>1655093I guess everywhere, like even on the most simple of platforms if a woman says or does something even slightly inflammatory it will be met with vileness and three woman coffee emoji comments.
No. 1655135
>>1655129a huge group of drunk moids who are also puberty-roided teens? that certainly won't end well
and please tell me there aren't any girls with them
No. 1655256
>>1654801>my dad makes me and my sisters clean his room and change his dirty ass sheets.It's not your brothers fault he's gross and coddled, your parents failed him and his autism.
Tell your sisters that it's not fair to you guys and you should all refuse to do things for him from now on. He's your fathers son, he's the one who has to take care of him - not his sisters. Leave the room smelly and gross until your dad deals with that literal shit himself, or chooses to mistreat his son. If your sisters feel bad and still do it that's on them, but you can still refuse so at least you get out of it.
He doesn't want his son to get married to be happy, he just wants a replacement for you girls to clean for him. What your brother needs is supported living from paid professionals. Which is up to your parents to pay for and arrange. If he becomes homeless that's your parents fault.
>>1655202>my mother seems to be under the impression that i will take care of him or help in some way whenever she's too old or sick to do sohonestly just straight up tell her you won't do that, it's on her to make sure her son is ok before she can't do it anymore
No. 1655291
>>1655255That's fucked up nonna. I don't know why reddit is so much worse than even places like Tumblr or Twitter for that kind of shit. I mean, I guess they are less likely to believe
victims because reddit really is mostly men but is pretty abysmal there
No. 1655337
File: 1691279251415.jpg (101.12 KB, 735x905, dd514e1938728df8f7ad03434d5e10…)
BITCH WE MISS YOU GET BACK IN THE CHAT LIKE HOW MANY GIFS DOES A GIRL GOTTA SEND YOU DAMN LIKE COME ON
No. 1655390
File: 1691282004489.jpeg (44.02 KB, 500x502, 321774f8-18f5-4e39-bafb-7e0fa7…)
Evertime I make an embarrassing typo it makes me want to kms
No. 1655451
>>1655444Instagram? Who TF even goes there and bothers to leave a comment for the vapid women who post there.
You're basing you opinions on a few incels that have nothing better to do than post comments on instagram reels. And you of course have nothing better to do but read them.
No. 1655453
>>1655438I know this feel,
nonnie.
No. 1655454
>>1655448Leaving takes time and money
If it's the other way out, it's a shot in the dark it even works
I understand you anon
I wish I weren't here right now
No. 1655463
File: 1691292065271.jpg (487.8 KB, 1200x1586, Arts_706b6c_6410925.jpg)
I want a baby so badly, I am extremely maternal person and every cell in my body is driving me to get pregnant and become a mother. But I can never become one. If I give birth to a male he is guaranteed to be subjected to porn from a young age, will probably grow up addicted to porn, will probably get off on the most disgusting shit. Even if he doesn't physically abuse women he'll still treat them as shit, as males do. He will be told from pre-school age that he's probably a tranny or gay and its normal to have casual sex with every other male he meets. There would be nothing I could do whatsoever to stop this happening to him. If I have a girl she will be destroyed by this world, she will be twerking on Tiktok, she'll be getting lip fillers because of her deep hatred of herself, because the outside forces that are society will consume her. Again, I am powerless to do anything to protect her from it. So every day I feel like I am grieving for children I have never had. My sister is trying to get pregnant and I have to bite my tongue about all of this and pretend I am happy for her when all I can think is "she is birthing more lambs to the slaughter." She is a bit of a pick me so wouldn't care if her son was a porn addict at age 10. It's so unfair. She asks me why am I not going to have children despite having said I would love to, and I just tell her I can't inflict this world onto any child of mine. My boyfriend wants children, of course he fucking does, males get handed a whole free child, there is no work for him. He can dip out at any time. Anything that happens to our children will be my fault. I am stuck grieving children I never got to birth for the rest of my life.
No. 1655504
File: 1691300322134.jpeg (59.88 KB, 500x644, IMG_0302.jpeg)
im in a rare "horny" period, since my birth control tends to ruin my libido. im in a long term relationship but im uninterested in partnered sex, mostly due to post-iud sex has been painful and because frankly i just want to do my own thing and not have to think about someone else or even have to communicate to them. i just really want to do my own thing, but what's driving me crazy is that i just want to masturbate for like hours on end, which is hard and kinda embarrassing to do when someone else is around but i'm so fucking frustrated!!!
No. 1655582
>>1654449You're right, nonna. This is the worst case scenario, I wouldn't take this from a nigel or another moid. I keep getting lulled into a false sense of security because he's my dad and he acts caring the rest of the time. Idk maybe for some people the "good times" would be worth it, but I feel like the disrespect alone is over the top. I don't want to be spoken to like a fucking dog.
My dad said most places that pay what I need to live on my own would never accept someone with a resume gap, but I'm going to try anyways. I don't really care about being "unethical" when most companies don't care about being ethical, so I'll do what you're advising.
And thank you for the filing clerk recommendation. I looked into some jobs along that line and they sound like they can get very stressful, but their bare minimum is a diploma (+ experience which I am going to lie about having), so I'll go for them when the time comes. If they think I suck, then I just have some more training for my next job. I think I'll also post in the career/employment thread to see if they have any ideas.
Suggesting "by the end of 2023 I will have my resume complete and an account created" was helpful, I am going to set that as my goal for now. (I'm assuming you meant LinkedIn account!)
>>1654635My dad has been in his line of work for like 30+ years, so thanks for informing me about the actual job climate. I'm so relieved knowing my autist ways aren't a one way ticket to getting terminated. I also feel a lot better about that long gap; I was made to believe it made me near permanently unemployable.
I do like assembling furniture! I know Taskrabbit isn't really a steady income situation, so maybe I'll use that to try getting used to being around people in a "professional" setting again, or between "administrative" jobs.
I am not a bong! I'd love to know what made you think I was kek, but I am a humble burger. I will take your advice and get a therapist, to help with job stress at the very least. I was really discouraged from seeing one for multiple reasons, but I'm in a new area so I will try again. My state also connects you with services if you're a tard, so I will try contacting them and see if they can help me with a work plan.
Thank you both so much for responding. Your posts really helped me and I feel a lot better now about trying to get out of this mess. I will be forever grateful to you, nonnas, and I hope you both receive tenfold the kindness you've shown me.
No. 1655597
File: 1691305928968.jpeg (68.51 KB, 748x421, IMG_9392.jpeg)
>>1655554I want a nigel who's got all my ideal looks in a man, is less of a loser than me, loves me unconditionally in all my brokenness, and he'll never exist in a million years
but it could happen No. 1655609
>>1655601the bar is in the basement
godspeed
No. 1655623
>>1655597It can happen anon. I am a
femcel autist who’s been unemployed for a few years after a mental breakdown. Still unemployed now but took a year to focus on therapy, rebuilding hobbies and skills. I have a Nigel bf who pays for everything, only ever comes online to watch cat videos or message his family on Facebook and spends all his free time travelling (and paying for everything while bringing me with him) or playing yugioh or going to the gym/walks in nature. Men truly do not care if you make zero money, as long as you are a good gf to them
No. 1655686
>>1655680nta but isn't the whole point of
femcel being unable to get a bf?
No. 1655735
File: 1691316483796.jpeg (1.16 MB, 4032x1857, IMG_4498.jpeg)
>at bbq with bf and his friends
>his mates drink and take Ketamine every day
>ask bf not to drink and drive me home
>he has two DUI car crashes from years past
>confiscate the beer his friend gave him
>his friend kicks me out of the bbq over this
>they tell him i’m an abusive whore and give him an ultimatum
kek druggies really are so fragile and easily triggered
No. 1655750
>>1655623>femcel>bflol
anyway, how did you meet? Did you just ask him to pay for things or what? What exactly is he paying for? (small things or big things like your bills and trips?) I'm a moron when it comes to men and money.
No. 1655759
>>1655750I think I just move in different circles where
femcel has taken a different meaning to what it means here. But yeah we actually met through yugioh. He is conventionally attractive and looks very normie so I was attracted to him. I laid out from the very beginning that I will never go 50/50 with him, that I have more traditional values and I expect my man to take care of me financially, and I understand if he is not comfortable with that he is free to move on, no hard feelings. I explained my goal is to be a house wife (although I am working on starting a small WFH business but it won't be my priority if I'm housewifing) and I'm not interested in any other type of relationship. He is quite masculine and said he is looking for something like this also, and has no problem being the provider. I understand this type of relationship isn't for every woman, but it is for me. He currently covers my phone bill and Apple Watch bill each month which comes to about $70, he offered to pay more bills but I declined as we've only been dating a year. He then puts away a decent % of each check into savings to pay for my travel. He sends me money each week usually for me to spend how I want just to let me know he is thinking of me. Any meal we have together, anything we do together, he pays for all of it. If we end up living together he will be responsible for 100% of the bills. Masculine men seriously love providing for you, it makes them much happier than if you were paying for them. Again not everyone's type of man, but definitely mine. Unless a man is extremely wealthy he will be hesitant to spend on you (and I don't just mean the first few dates) so being direct about this weeds the time wasters out fast.
No. 1655778
>>1655759>traditional valuesdo these "traditional values" include being submissive to your husband? He's the head of the household who makes the decisions, you listen to him yada yada you know how it goes.
I'm not trying to be catty or anything, I'm just fascinated with women who claim to have traditional values. I sort of get wanting to be taken care of (the risk of dependency would never be worth it to me personally) but not at the cost of being "submissive" as would be expected in a truly traditional household.
No. 1655782
>>1655759>laid out I'll never go 50/50based
I love yugioh, you're lucky
was it online? What yugioh platform? I gotta start weeding the men out more.
I'm actually pretty disappointed that my parents didn't teach me any of this, and I've been surrounded by losers who set the "normal" for me. Watching women bend over backwards and drive around men and pay bills and pay for dinner etc. I'm shy around moids too (cringe) so it makes it harder for me to be direct.
No. 1655790
>>1655778Truly traditional would be a woman juggling multiple suitors who try to impress her.
Real submission imo is all the women who have been brainwashed to bend over backwards and work then hand over half or more of the bills while maintaining status quo in other areas too (not OP but I'm the other person asking for advice from her) at that point he's a roommate getting access to your body
No. 1655800
>>1655793You have a point but I'm not trying to be "trad" in the "1950s American housewife" sense.
I mean men helping me level up. Men bending over to please me. Men spending their money on me, while both encouraging me to continue my education/business/work but also very much supportive if I want to be a NEET.
But thanks I guess, makes me feel a bit better… ;_;
(;_;) No. 1655805
>>1655793Oh sorry also I read this just now
>bend over backwards for menOh no no no. I mean men bending backwards for ME. Giving me money while he's also cleaning and cooking is the dream.
A submissive working bf/husband.
No. 1655808
>>1655793I wouldn't say used but I'd say autistic, disabled or unemployed women are much more likely to become
victims to abuse. So you're correct. An autistic unemployed woman without education won't be able to leave an
abusive marriage because she won't have the financial or social means to do so. It's a very difficult situation to be in as a woman but anons won't accept that because it ruins their fantasies of being a based stacy tradwife.
No. 1655810
>>1655778When I say traditional I don’t mean tradwife, I just mean traditional leaning. For me I am sick to death of watching men get paid more for the same work as women, women systemically rejected from higher paying jobs, workplaces being designed by men for men with no consideration for women’s happiness or safety, women’s work in the home being reduced to worthlessness, women who do work full time still doing 80% of the housework (even if her scrote is unemployed!) all to give life to another human through her body to be pushed off back to the office so she can get half that rent paid while all her husband had to do is cum, sit back and relax and wait for his free baby. Money is a system designed by men, for men. As my man you should be paying that benefit to me. The whole purpose men even want money for is to get women. They want to be rich to either get many women or access to one good woman. If I had a daughter I would only want her to have a man who used his privileges to protect and provide for her, and that is even if she is a career woman making a lot of her own money. My daughter would deserve a man who values her and isn’t a gold/baby digger using her as a work horse. So I am leading by example. I can support myself just fine, if any man wants to come into my life he MUST protect and provide or he is pointless to me. I do think it’s healthy for men to do this, they genuinely enjoy it, it sets off their monkey brain and gets their testosterone flowing to provide for their women. Men who don’t have this response tend to be more feminine, which is fine if you like that. I do not, I like a masculine man who takes charge of things and takes care of things. I personally prefer a support role, I like to nurture and support and follow his lead most times. But this is after heavy, heavy vetting. I am not his slave, I refuse to cook or clean until we are married and even then if I don’t feel like it I’m not doing it. It’s ofc very dangerous to fully depend on a man and opens you up to a lot of risk, I am extremely fortunate in that I inherited my own house and have skills to make money to support myself (when I’m working again every penny will be going into my own pocket except on his birthdays and Christmas) so I will never ever be needing him to survive and my advice would be to build skills and a job you can fall back on if things go wrong if you marry into this situation. I’d actually advise to keep working and make your own money if it’s possible until you get pregnant and be sure you lock it away so you man doesn’t see a penny. Lay out an agreement before you marry he will pay you a monthly housekeeping check so he is paying you for your labour, save a part of it so you have a nest egg for yourself. But yes, I truly believe men should pay for everything and all money women make should stay in their own pocket. So yes, I wouldn’t say I’m a trad wife, just traditional leanings
No. 1655815
>>1655809No man would, it's a
femcel fantasizing let her be. If incels can fantasize about their virgin tradwife who cleans cooks and births then 10 kids,
femcels can also fantasize about the same thing.
No. 1655819
>>1655782It was online! He is really serious about it, I am more casual. He has a lot of friends who play and a lot are similar to him, nerdy but fairly normie guys who aren’t very online with good jobs. A lot of women overlook them purely because of their “loser” hobby but for us it’s actually a positive.
We live in a world where everything women do has been so devalued that even producing another life has zero value and not enough to stop women being forced into a workplace designed for men and away from her baby so another woman can raise it. You do need to have a level of cut throat if you want a relationship like this, you have to tell them outright this is what you want and that’s that, and if he falls behind on your expectation you will drop him and move onto the next. You also do have to be financially literate and know how to protect yourself or youre opening yourself up to abuse. You need to be confident and an asset to a mans life tho being shy is prob a good quality for many as long as its not insecurity. Id genuinely not be able to be attracted to a man that wanted me to pay on a date tbh i may as well just go out with a friend at that point
No. 1655867
>>1655833No they wont. I knew a few guys with femdom fetish and had them send me money with nothing in return but I'd rather kill myself than date those porn addicts seriously. They wouldn't clean or cook for you unless it was sexual in nature.
Though you're wrong in the younger part, a lot of femdom or findom-fags are men with severe mommy issues and most prefer older women in my experience. The few I knew chased after 30-40+ year old women when they were in their twenties themselves.