File: 1680241385814.jpeg (39.7 KB, 770x620, B71D63E8-BF63-4A2F-8F9C-324125…)
No. 1537553
File: 1680244060632.jpeg (56.87 KB, 680x383, 892ED6C0-7C2C-43C2-9B52-0E8780…)
My boss told me yesterday I was getting an EOFY $1000 bonus which I was thrilled about, but today my payslip came in and after taxes, student loan payments and mandated retirement contributions it was just over $400. I wouldn’t be mad if my government wasn’t as bloated and useless as a beached whale and that the consultants whose salaries I'm contributing to weren’t working half has hard as me for twice the pay. And to top it all off my satisfyer died when I was right on the edge and I nearly smashed it open with a hammer because I was so furious. I’m writing this while I wait for it to charge kek
No. 1537566
File: 1680246366179.jpg (18.72 KB, 275x253, thisisfine.jpg)
sober for a week cold turkey just because alcohol was making me too fucking fat and god is it boring being sober
legit want to off myself at how boring life seems to be. alcohol really did make everything fun, or at least, more tolerable. i cant sleep either its fine this is fine
would rather be miserable for a little bit than fat forever(Reddit spacing)
No. 1537639
I'm going to hell for sure. Roughly two years ago, a friend of a friend accidentally gave me bedbugs. I had 4 extermination sessions, one steaming session, and I also experimented with diatomaceous earth. The exterminators told me that there is no chance that the apartment has bedbugs as they did not find the usual sign (bloodspots on the sheets, dead bugs, feces, etc). It was such a hassle, the extermination, the dusting, etc that I sort of stopped caring if I have them or not. After a while I started getting itchy spots again but they were different - they didn't swell up, they weren't painful to the touch and they didn't itch that much so I got convinced that the exterminators were right and these couldn't be bedbugs after all. Also, there were still no other signs - no feces, no bloodsmears, nothing. My boyfriend recently moved in with me and I noticed he's getting the same itchy spots but he never mentioned and I was afraid to bring it up at all because I was afraid that he would think of me as unsanitary or something and would want to break up with me. He's been complaining that he feels tired and needs to nap several times a day and if it is bedbugs after all, I'm afraid that it could be from the blood loss perhaps??
I feel guilty and ashamed and unsure what to do. After all the extermination attempts I feel it's pointless to call the exterminators again - especially since there are still no signs of the bugs. And I mean I look for them on a regular basis - I screwed the bed apart, examined the nightstand, sprayed every crack on the walls I could find - and nothing. I just feel awful that I dragged my innocent bf into this and he's affected by it. I was thinking of maybe arranging a heat treatment secretly but I just don't know what to tell him to not come home in that timeframe? Gosh I hate myself
No. 1537654
File: 1680259871232.jpg (19.38 KB, 300x300, il_300x300.1827104927_f32n.jpg)
>>1537566Same, been having an extremely rough time in life with people who keep trying to antagonize me in my work and personal life, and alcohol is really the only thing that helps given weed makes me anxious, I gained like 12 lbs over the past few mos between drinking and stress eating junk food + my friends continually buying and giving me Gatorade and high sugar drinks as chasers/hydration drinks so I'm in the same same boat. I never really drank much but fuck, people who really want to fuck up your life really make rawdogging life impossible. I have no issue giving it up but it really is great just to have a shot to take the edge off every so often. Not fat but 12 lbs feels like absolute shit on my frame and I feel like my body is weighed down. Also hate having boobs now and needing to wear a bra instead of being able to go without one
No. 1537679
File: 1680264222980.jpg (12.34 KB, 236x236, 16cc251f394a53e229fd250abac660…)
>realising im growing up
>realising my family will get distant from me because i'm an adult and don't need their help or love
>realise i need to stop dressing comfy and tomboyish and start dressing like a proper woman so im not a joke, i don't even know how to wear makeup
>realising im all my family will scatter, either university, work, we won't see each other
>realising the past is getting further away and the present does not yet make sense
>realising how ungrateful i have been, my lack of perspective, my defensiveness
>realising how lonely early adulthood is
No. 1537685
>>1537639I wonder if there’s something else in the apartment that’s making you react. Gas leaks can cause skin irritation and fatigue. You need to contact your apartment management so they can check into it
btw how did you go your whole ass relationship without mentioning the bugs, extermination attempts, or your skin irritation or long enough to get your boyfriend to move in with you??
No. 1537686
File: 1680265094327.png (14.31 KB, 275x248, pepenona1.png)
>>1537540>>1537684You sound like twitter tards, there's nothing inherently scrotey about pepe.
No. 1537689
File: 1680265366747.png (83.34 KB, 1834x721, Screenshot 2023-03-31 at 14.21…)
>>1537640I never minded redditspacing before but in the past weeks there's been a few distinct users whose posts fill up the entire screen. I think it's half kiwitards (they can never stop themselves from posting their smug essays) and half newfags from Twitter/Tiktok who censor words like vagina and suicide
Sorry I meant self deletion No. 1537706
>>1537698You remind me of this anon
>>849399>>854513Her update
>>857713 No. 1537711
>>1537710There is a picture of Elsie ITT
Pepe Elsie kek
>>1537686 No. 1537728
File: 1680269651141.png (709.01 KB, 2000x2500, bumpdontscroll.png)
do not scroll
No. 1537755
File: 1680272397073.jpeg (446.41 KB, 1284x1622, 00B22F92-7460-408E-AEB0-736E9F…)
i posted here a few days ago really panicking & sadly things have not improved. nonnies gave sweet encouragement for me to try an snri that worked in the past but my psychiatrist has not even responded back for 5 days now (the office is so bad, they hardly refill my current medicine on time) and im just starting to feel put off from the idea of trying medicine. wondering if i should just keep trying to push through & take baby steps with as much self compassion as possible, and maybe i can increase therapy sessions temporarily.
i feel very tense, panicky, sleeping too much, cant focus. i eat enough & very clean, maybe could use some more water lately…i only take a stimulant the same one ive been on for years and supplements that have had no bad effects ever but i have noticed its been less effective (the stimulant) & i dont know why. im sober and i was drinking a lot of caffeine last week so now i havent been incase it was making things worse. i went for a walk today, trying to keep myself busy, working part time & maybe things will feel ok again.
i just feel so burnt out & stressed..so much to do, so much i truly want to do, but at the same time fighting some weird cognitive issues & brain fog & feeling of anxiety and depression yet i really want to live and feel happy?!
im trying to talk to friends again because ive been isolating myself a lot so i can try to get things done ive been slacking on but then sometimes i feel like i dont deserve to talk tot hese friends when i have so much i need to do. i make to do lists, i try to be mindful with the task at hand, i just feel this constant tightness in my chest. it wasnt like this before. i had improved so much so i just dont understand why all of a sudden this is how it must be. my period is over. i dont know what more to do. i feel bad my best friend has to put up with me being such a shell lately.
it feels nice to vent this all out…hopefully i can feel ok again if i just keep doing my best.
No. 1537769
>>1537698bedbugs are nearly impossible to get rid of. you're better off just burning the mattress in gasoline and getting a new one if you can afford it lol. they burrow and lay eggs deep inside the mattress itself, so it is very easy to miss them. you may want to try buying a really powerful steam cleaner and see if you can steam the bed a few times in the hopes that will roast them muthafuckers alive. even if it doesn't, at least your bed will smell nice.
idk if you are a burger but when we had a flea infestation in my grandparents' home a few years ago, my mom and i went to home depot and bought those diy flea, tick, and bedbug spray kits with the gallon of insecticide that you put the spray nozzle in, and i went around the house and did a full treatment every 2 weeks (which is around the time it takes for flea eggs to hatch). we also took all our bedding to the laundromat and washed everything with at least a cup of borax per load (dries out their exoskeletons). then as a preventative measure, i sprinkled diatomaceous earth on the mattresses, around the baseboards, over the carpet in the corners…all the places i read that bugs like to hide. i even went in the backyard and did this, which was sad because i ended up killing a lot of good buggies in the process, but i was so traumatized by being bitten by fleas because we were covered in bites like you were describing. the only difference here is that fleas are a little bit easier to kill than bedbugs, but the process to get rid of them is similar in many ways. it's doable but you will need to continously do this for a few months, if not a year.
No. 1537794
>>1537769oh, i forgot to mention. i also treated all of our cars, washed all our clothes (literally all of them), pillows…anything with fabric you have to treat or else dormant eggs will hatch again. the bugs will usually hide themselves in places you wouldn't expect, like car upholstery, bath rugs, even curtains can have eggs. spray down cracks in the house too, along the seams in the flooring, underneath cabinets…everywhere. anything in the house that was fabric got the run down. if it couldn't be washed i would try to steam it, take it to the dry cleaners, or spray it down with the bug treatment and then borax and diatomaceous earth. we also replaced some of our bagless vacuums as they will crawl down through the filters and just re-enter the home if you don't clean them right away. if you have bagless vacuums, you have to spread diatomaceous earth and borax over the entirety of the floor, let it sit for an hour or two, preferably overnight and then vacuum. take the canister out immediately once you are done, and dump it. if you have a bagless vacuum it is better because they get trapped in the bag and can't escape.
No. 1537914
>>1537906How to ruin a Worker's Movement, by USA:
Associate it with degenerates
No. 1537960
File: 1680289946776.jpg (47.03 KB, 680x436, 1679509393755.jpg)
I met a guy at work and he's autistic like me, he's also a gnostic like me, a bookworm and cinephile and a lefty but not the mainstream type, more like a Hegelian one. He scares me, not because he's creepy or something, it just scares me to meet someone similar to me. I don't know how to behave around someone as autistic and interested in the same stuff, like it's great on one hand but idk. I genuinely want to have a friend in him but I'm scared that if I spent more time with him he will develop feelings for me and I'm not interested in relationships with anyone. I still can't believe I met someone like him, after a lifetime of existential isolation. I wish I was a man, just to have a friend in someone like him, without the fear.
No. 1538002
File: 1680293210900.jpg (33.95 KB, 686x720, c5e1168a83ea384e8ec586eced15c0…)
>Find this artist on Reddit
>She seems nice
>We share husbandos
>She makes a Twitter account
>Follow her
>3 months in
>Most of her tweets are complains and very little art
>Tired because this fandom already has drama every week
>Debating if I should just unfollow her
No. 1538027
>>1537960lucky you! I think you should go for it. If you have much in common then he will most likely want to be your friend too. I'm autistic too so I understand having trouble with making friends though a potential romance can be troublesome. I say try to befriend him and if he does confess to you in the future then tell him you are not interested. I think losing a potential friendship because he might fall in love with you is a shame
>>1538002>Most of her tweets are complains and very little artthat's just how twitter is. It's a platform designed to tweet whatever comes to your mind plus the whole culture on there encourages it. It's dreadful that it has become the main hub for art
No. 1538043
File: 1680296990148.jpg (53.13 KB, 556x700, 422fac415f9903fa98a838aa41b956…)
He treats me like a burden. Only wants silence and to be left alone. Does he expect me to not find appreciation and love elsewhere? My mind goes back to my ex, who was never any better, but in my daydreams he is perfect. In this reality he knows how to love me and it makes me somehow miss him, but the memories I have aren't real between us. I wish I never met men.
No. 1538147
File: 1680305304129.jpg (23.51 KB, 275x220, 1663529738636.jpg)
>CONTINUOUS GLUCOSE MONITOR HAS ONE DAY LEFT
>ACCIDENTALLY RIP IT OUT AT WORK BY RUBBING ARM AGAINST CHAIR IN BREAK ROOM
>GO HOME
>PUT ON LAST FUCKING CONTINUOUS GLUCOSE MONITOR
>SUPPOSED TO LAST ME 14 DAYS
>RIP IT OFF ACCIDENTALLY PUTTING ON A JEAN JACKET
I'm going to kill myself there is no fucking way the pharmacy isn't going to ask for my soul, firstborn, and ten trillion dollars because it's just not possible that the prescription renewed already I fucking hate America and I want everyone making money off of diabetics to fucking explode PAINFULLY.
No. 1538190
File: 1680315218092.jpeg (47.38 KB, 750x741, E4695A9B-B1D8-4B45-B644-8CF408…)
I have experienced gender dysphoria since I was 9 and I’m starting to realize that this is something I’m either going to have to repress for the rest of my life or give into the urges and troon out. If I do go on T I wouldn’t go out of my way to force everyone to use male pronouns for me, but I have this fear that no matter which path I choose I will always be miserable, and it will never be enough. My greatest fear is that if I go on testosterone, I’ll end up wanting top surgery, and if I get top surgery, I’ll probably still feel like it isn’t enough and I’ll get bottom surgery or something. But if I don’t go on testosterone, I will be miserable and suicidal. I have read all of the radfem/GC literature in the world and nothing has helped. I’m starting to think it’s a genetic thing bc my dad is a closeted tranny too. I am so scared, I already get sm shit as a gender nonconforming woman, I can’t imagine how much worse it is for trannies
No. 1538203
File: 1680319253080.jpeg (55.52 KB, 1284x695, 74F700D4-3742-4521-8626-F24F5F…)
>>1538197Same fag but anons bitched at me yesterday for thinking the post was sus but I found the same post on a moms forum that was deleted for being inappropriate. I knew I was right!
No. 1538206
>>1538190Or you could:
a) hang around some detransitioners. Hearing their stories could help you deal with what is causing your dysphoria
b) find a therapist is willing to work with you and not affirm you
c) both
No. 1538220
>>1538205>>1538198I already know that I will never be man. If I’d didn’t know that I was a woman I wouldn’t want to troon out
>>1538206I think it’s a combination of genetics + internalized societal misogyny + just liking the way the way that androgyny/masculinity looks
>>1538199I will try this. Read a little bit into it when I was in ED residential but not much.
No. 1538255
File: 1680327952308.jpeg (36.86 KB, 828x529, 0247DC45-AB8E-4D5C-A836-06F074…)
Why are so many scrotes anti tattoo?? Maybe I hang out with a lot of retards but they shit on tattoos every chance they get. It’s always with they’re so trashy and make you look like a cheap prostitute.
I just want to have to tattoos man. I’m a big retard who cares what my bf thinks and he along with our scrote friends think tattoos are gross.
I’m in pickme hell and wish I could liberate myself.
I mean I see the logic and rationale about not caring what men think and not letting your bf dictate what you can and cannot do with your body but I can’t help myself and yearn desperately for their approval.
My ex chimped out and treated me like I cheated on him when I got my ear piercings. I felt like shit and worthless from his disapproval but still left my earrings in cause I liked them.
I will probably end up getting my tattoos I’ll just have that sad period male disapproval and continue on with my life.
No. 1538273
>>1538190I'm going to preface this by saying that I myself am a TIF. If you have Bulimia or Anorexia, you probably do not have dysphoria whatsoever and moreso have a problem with your fat deposits, which can be fixed with therapy. If you do have dysphoria, no amount of therapy has any scientific evidence to help, and HRT is not much better in terms of research, but since it's 50/50, I guess that means most doctors jumped on it instead of doing actual research on other methods or considering trying everything in the book before settling on something permanent.
Essentially, try everything you can besides trooning. Usually people detransition because it was another issue than dysphoria, they ran out of money, or they had such severe side effects they could not continue. If it helps, that's lucky. If it hurts, it's permanent. So rambling aside, try to recover from your ED first before bringing up your dysphoria whatsoever. If it helps it go away, you were dysmorphic, not gender dysphoric, and you dodged a bullet.
>>1538235Most therapy offices in the states fire TERFy therapists on the spot if they ever say anything even mildly anti-troon. Like, it's explicitly against most offices ethics codes, so the grand majority are pro-troon and those that are not usually get fired and blacklisted the moment they say anything. The exceptions, I think, are Oklahoma, Florida, and Utah which are massive shitholes for women, especially lesbians and GNC women.
It's sad, really. I think they should at least be critical of children trooning, even if they're fine with or support adults doing it.
No. 1538313
File: 1680336425926.jpeg (174.09 KB, 750x1265, AD843DC3-B63E-4546-8FD6-A5E8F7…)
>>1538190people have compared trans shit to being a form of OCD and I think viewing it that way might be helpful. Be wary of thinking "it must be genetic", if your dad was a closeted troon growing up that surely must've had an effect on you. pic is from a lesbian with dysphoria, she links to this site for help finding a therapist.
https://www.genderexploratory.com/find/?amp=1 No. 1538314
>>1538255I've had tattoos for 15 years. I always went for the least visable areas. I hate anything that brings attention to me in public so I was wary of that opening me up to strangers feeling like they had an 'in' to randomly critique me. Becuase it happens to women. I know why I got them.. I love them just as much now as I did all those years ago and the last thing they're about is sex or attention from strangers.
On the (very rare) occasions where any of mine show in the slightest.. the rate of me getting approached by men goes through the roof. Though its usually them chatting you up and dying to see what else you have. Men are the ones who think tattoos equal 'ooh she's kinky' They're the ones making it sexual. They're the ones that want you to lift your clothing to show them rest of the tatt. If you're someone who hates attention or has anxiety oevr strangers approaching you.. it is something to consider when you're chosing the placement of them.
No. 1538315
>>1538302Because I like hearing out the opinions of others and part of me hopes there's another way out than permanent alterations to my body, although my expectations are low. Very, very low. In fact, I hold significant doubt another way out exists and I'm actively suicidal every moment of every day because I do not recognize the body I am in as my own, but it's exclusively affecting the female exclusive bits, and I haven't taken HRT because I have to travel over 3 hours just to see a doctor for it.
>>1538310Yes, this is based on personal experience, the only other detrans people I've ran into detransitioned after getting into radical feminism and feeling it was hypocritical to not detransition. I hold no ill will to detransitioners, and I think their stories are worth just as much as people who still troon out. I understand the horrors of dysphoria, just like I understand that some doctors force transition on people that don't need it. It's interesting that you had a completely different experience. The only times I think detransitioners are full of it and need to fuck off are when they think it isn't right for anybody and should be banned for adults. I understand why they think that, but that's selfish and retarded.
No. 1538337
>>1538330That makes sense, too. I have a lot of other problems, like autism that was diagnosed over a decade ago. I don't have any trauma related to being female whatsoever, so it isn't that. My dysphoria is so severe that most people struggle to understand it, on top of that, taking basic care of myself is very hard because seeing my breasts, vagina, and lack of body hair makes me panic due to feeling like my head was screwed on some innocent woman's body.
But, I'm glad you're doing better detransitioned. We need more methods of treatment than jumping straight to HRT.
No. 1538368
>>1538190Are you an autist by any chance? I think it makes dysphoria so much worse, you are more likely to develop ED and body dysmorphia if you're an autist anyway. I wanted to be a boy since I remember, I still would prefer to be born a man, but I know there's nothing I can do, I'm just coping with it day by day. I find human body disgusting regardless of sex, and if that was an option I would prefer to have no sexual organs at all, and I have no sex-related trauma. Female bodies just have more of the stuff that gross me out, like period blood. I hate when I feel like the integrity of my being is somehow violated, and that includes things I have no control over, like period pain, or any other kind of pain, that's also why I will never have sex with anyone because I don't want anything or anyone to inferfere with my body, I don't even go to hairdressers because I can't stand how they touch my hair and my scalp. I think autists are detached from their material form and they hate when something reminds them they exist in a body, it's just the natural reality of autism (for the same reason I don't like eating or grooming myself, and I never liked it, but I do it anyway because I know I have to, although there were periods of me not taking a bath for like 3 months when I was a teen, or not eating for days). It just so happens the female body has more of that stuff, from both biological and societal side. More things to remind me I exist in a body, which I hate. I just find male form more comfortable and agile, although not free from being gross. Of course, society also plays a role here, I preferred "boy" toys and I didn't like girly clothes and toys and I didn't like group activities and taking care of others, except for animals, and I was treated like a weirdo for it, but I think I would be dysphoric anyway, due to 'tism. We are able to do the math pretty early and understand that boys can like girly things and girls can like boyish things and it doesn't fucking matter, society is retarded. But that doesn't change the fact we still have dysphoria. I heard physical activity helps, but it depends with me, sometimes I feel like it indeed helps for a moment, and sometimes I feel like it makes things even worse.
Therapy is a meme, don't bother. My therapist in high school literally told me I can't be dysphoric because I don't want to cut my tits off and I don't "present" myself as a male. I already knew it won't do shit, I knew the radfem literature, I knew the suicide rates won't drop after surgery, I knew I was autistic etc. If you don't want to medically troon out, they won't take you seriously.
There's no way out imo, just cope and focus on your hobbies and physical activity if that ever helps. Also cutting off carbs and going on ketogenic diet helps.
No. 1538384
File: 1680347779563.jpeg (95.41 KB, 1169x1213, 2AC9D1B6-1339-401F-B14E-A051A1…)
It really warms my heart to see these brave straight people fight for their right to call themselves gay
No. 1538387
>>1538336I'm hoping this isn't the case, anon.
I also had a cancer scare but it was in my breast (lump, then doc found another when examining me). For 2 weeks while I waited for my appointment with the breast clinic, I was a fucking mess to the point where I needed to be prescribed benzos so I could sleep and not be anxious because I was just freaking out and convinced I had cancer. Luckily, the lumps turned out to be nothing nefarious/likely a cyst or something benign. I know it can be terrifying to be in that limbo of knowing something isn't right but not being sure what it is, but please try and relax as best as you can. If you can, seek specialist counsel regarding this if you feel like your doctors aren't taking your concerns seriously.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.
No. 1538423
>>1538403The only thing you can control is getting rid of the boyfriend, he's a shit one and probably an incel like all the young ones seem to be these days. If you don't, guaranteed he'll make your birthday worse.
It feels like you're equating the shitty things happening in your life with growing up, but once things settle down and get better you can experience simple pleasures all the same. Sorry to hear you're going through it nona.
No. 1538458
>>1538445I had an autistic peer like this who enraged and disgusted me all the time too. Peed with the bathroom door open, farted in front of everyone constantly, needed everything done for him while bragging about being a genius.
Not even the worst autistic moid I knew by far, I swear most autistic women are okay or even rather pleasant to be around, but the vast majority of autistic moids reek, never got taught social decency or grooming, no shame, look at hentai in public, blatantly sexually harass women, depend on women to do things they’re capable of doing themselves and just don’t out of ease and habit, hit and kick people, etc.
No. 1538459
File: 1680357902149.jpg (25.68 KB, 264x373, Bawwwww_bunny.jpg)
Left the window open while sleeping, it rained on my computer and now it won't power up
No. 1538480
File: 1680359488631.jpg (10.82 KB, 500x375, 1acaa4d6-17a4-4659-b010-3cb8f6…)
GOING TO MY FIRST GOTH/PUNK/HARDCORE SHOW TONIGHT. Its in a city known for hardcore, and in a house (which I just found out a while ago), so its my first house/basement show too. Wish me luck nonnies, have any advice? I have no idea what to do other than go in and see the band I want. I saw "crowdkilling" teens and girls is a meme/truth, as someone who still looks like a teen girl that was nice to learn.
No. 1538482
File: 1680359631231.jpg (74.56 KB, 610x406, mosh-pit1-610x406.jpg)
>>1538480kek don't worry, most real hardcore died in the 2000's and now you'll see a lot of posers, though who knows maybe the concert your going to is an exception
No. 1538612
>>1538535"This is my rendering style, I don't take criticism"
"If you are upset by my reaction to feedback, it would be best if it could be handled in private. I'm happy to open up my point of view, no need to bring the whole server into the conversation"
"I have attended different art schools several times, but I only accept feedback when I need and want it. In no case do I accept it from strangers, which is why I commented like that."
Plus condescending ass emotes after every message. All i criticised was how this person shaded and highlighted hair which looked so simple and messy i wouldn't even call it "rendering"
No. 1538620
>>1537960Damn nonnies, he messaged me and aksed if I would go to a museum with him tomorrow. Until now we were just talking at work and texting about our interests. Do men
always perceive going somewhere together as a sign of being romantically interested in them/date? Is this situation neutral?
No. 1538625
File: 1680371366590.jpg (Spoiler Image,125.54 KB, 997x1180, FpOeoFqWIAAJKt9.jpg)
I disagree with a lot of the outright disgusting homophobia I see on here lately and find it ignorant and pathetic but I am tired of that one specific brand of terminally online homosexual male that conveniently twists any critique of their embarassing arrested development into alleged homophobia. People don't dislike or insult you because you're gay, they do so because you're at the tail end of your 20s (often 30s too) and your entire vocabulary and personality is based upon online social contagion. You would not be keyboard smashing every sentence and posting constant ~shady asf comebacks~ at your ~oomfs~ if you had a fucking life or a backbone. All your language wasn't learned from being gay, it was from spending every waking hour online copying other people you admired or thought was funny. Your vernacular in totality is just you emulating another man emulating an annoying teenage girl. No, it isnt homophobic to tell you to grow the fuck up. Nobody is calling you a faggot or fantasizing about hatecriming you, you are a boring soulless Caucasian man with nary a hint of original thought and it has nothing to do with your sexuality, you just need any reach for victimhood online you can get so you can continue to shit on everyone else while being treated like a protected species. Just coddled your whole entire life with so much arrogance for no reason.
No. 1538645
>>1538616Anon, I mean this in the nicest way possible: I don't think your boyfriend being unable to get hard is the biggest thing to worry about here. What's the point of being in a "relationship" that indefinitely prevents you from seeing each other for literal years? Are you guys planning to move to the same city any time soon? Who knows what your bf is like 99.9% of the time you don't see him, he might have an entire double life and you'd have no way of knowing.
But to answer your question, yeah this can happen to men just because of nerves. He might also be gay and using you as his beard though, there isn't really any way of knowing. Either way, don't take it personally or let it affect your self esteem. I'm sure you are very lovely and attractive.
No. 1538646
>>1538617I think proship discourse is retarded because as long as it's not lolicon or feral, it's a non-issue. One of my favorite ships is from Danganronpa and is mutually
abusive, but it's helped me cope with my rather bad attatchment issues. For those curious, it's Junkan (Junko x Mikan) and I don't post about it because I'm scared of scrotes and children trying to harass me off platform over it. I also can't post any Vocaloid or Utau ships I like because the fandom is infamous for blacklisting and harassing proship and ship neutral community members.
No. 1538678
>>1538657>saying he's sorry about not being there but now that I know all these things about him I don't even know if I can believe him.You shouldn't believe him. Or rather, your dad isn't contacting you because he wants to make up for how he treated you. He's doing it to lessen his guilt for abandoning you. He most likely just wants you to forgive him so he can feel better about himself.
Also, abandoning you is mean. And ignoring when you were a teenager, also mean.
No. 1538690
>>1538617Since the beginning of time humans have worked through their feelings and made sense of their experiences through art, stories, fantasy, things that are made up and not actually real and occurring in real life. These are the same people who are so retarded that they think a character in a TV show saying something
problematic means that's the literal views of the writer coming out of the character's mouth and the writer needs to be put in jail. They need people to put tone indicators on their posts because they can't process the meaning of a reddit comment without help. I wouldn't take their opinions to heart.
No. 1538772
I don't understand why narcissists "like" me. They just fluctuate towards me and I feel like they show me a glimpse of their vulnerability and sides of their personality that they don't show to others. Like a girl literally tells me she's fake af by telling me a person should always say what others want to hear and keep their true thoughts to themselves, and I'm the only person she openly says it. She's faking it around others, being super charming and chatty and then calling the female coworkers who love her "bitches" and "cunts". She can't stand when I object her or I do something she doesn't like, she literally looks at me like she wants to kill me, with her bulging, creepy eyes. Another moment she can be totally sweet and caring towards me, touching me etc. I don't get it. I'm an autist, shy and quiet and I don't engage with people much, but if I have to express my opinion I always do it honestly, I said I will never pretend to be someone else, even if that means being alone my whole life. Maybe I feel like a safe option for narcissists because they know I won't tell anyone anything about them because I never engage in gossip, cliques etc.? It's tiresome, I wish I had healthy non toxic friends. I feel like this particular person often drains the life energy out of me, talking to me about other people, or passively-aggressively mocking me and criticizing me, then playing sweet with me, and then making me feel inferior again etc. It fucks with my brain
No. 1538776
File: 1680380840497.jpeg (1.63 MB, 4032x3024, EA708461-B4E9-4ABB-B34D-027F24…)
DAMN I HATE BEIN’ SOBER
No. 1538804
I haven’t seen my father in a long time (+5 years), now he’s staying with me for a few weeks and I reckon he’s such a boomer. I wonder when he got so bitter about literally everything. All he does now is complain and make awful remarks every chance he gets.
For example, we were at a restaurant ordering and our waiter was busy with other table. He asked another waitress to take our order and she specially and kindly explained that she couldn’t take our order because that wasn’t her table. Then my father proceeds to take his plate and ask her if she could take it away (mind you, our table was EMPTY), he only did it to make her feel obliged to do something for us.
We took the metro (which I usually never take because for me it’s not necessary) and it was delayed and pretty full (the timelines here are a mess compared to the country he comes from) and again with the long face, the sighs, checking his watch every 20 seconds and of course looking at other people in a very rude manner. I got fed up and I told him we could just leave if he didn’t feel comfortable and he goes “no, I’m perfectly fine”.
He did it again when we were taking a walk and he started complaining about the people who surrounded us and how everything has changed since he was here. He also told me that he knows he always complains about the place where he lives, but seeing the things he’s seeing here, he wouldn’t complain so much. That was kind of my last straw and I came back again at him with “yes, you’re pretty lucky you’re not living here then, eh? The misery is just for us after all.”
At this point I’m convinced he has some kind of borderline personality or something, he always has to find a reason to complain about everything, when he’s in his country, I have to spend more than one hour listening to him rambling about the same things over and over again. Here, he complains about whatever reason he can find.
It’s like he always has to be angry about everything, acting all defensive as if it was the world against him.
No. 1538829
>>1538646the character is young but i don't look at anything where she's her canon age in the series, only stuff where she's depicted with breasts/taller/a more adult figure because anything else makes me feel gross (some stuff does border on loli because she starts the series as a thirteen year old, it's too much for me that way) but i relate really heavily to what you're saying in regard to attachment issues and coping with them. i have some fairly serious trauma so just being able to project my desire to seek out my groomer/lack of closure onto my ship helps me cope. i relate to the vocaloid/utau stuff, im straight up afraid of that community.
>>1538690thank you.. from an objective perspective, i totally agree, it's nice to be told this and reminded. i just struggle a lot with internalizing it when i see so much hatred.
No. 1538847
File: 1680388881999.jpg (33.42 KB, 640x360, 3izk9y5h52161.jpg)
I'm afraid I'm too autistic to play any games other than Minecraft in peaceful mode. I'm very interested in Souls games and RE games and a bunch of others, like I know a lot about the lore without even playing them, but I know from experience I get too anxious over combat, I played Breath of the wild for some time and while I loved exploring, every time I had to fight something I felt like at the verge of a panic attack, it's just really unpleasant with my heart racing so fast and feeling like I'm in actual danger. Like my brain can't separate real danger from fake one, and the medium itself being too overstimulating for me. I didn't finish the game because of that. I finished Mario Odyssey but even there I got so stressed during every encounter it's absurd. But the worst was when I fallen into the pit and I had to hide from a t rex and there was no way to get out of there without having to sneak around him and risk getting killed. It was literally my childhood nightmare coming to life, I was super scared of t rexes and aliens as a kid. After finally getting out of the pit I put the game away for a few days kek. Why can't I just enjoy video gaaaames
No. 1538850
>>1538814Jesus, that's fucked anon.
Can you take a man with you to an appt? If you have a man there, they will probably listen.
Also, make another appt, and if they still don't do it, tell them you want it written in your chart/records. Sometimes, this prompts a doctor to order the testing, because it can open them up to malpractice charges if it's written down they denied your request.
Can you escalate this and file a complaint? If you have insurance, private or govt, file with them. Also, you can file with one whatever organization employees your doctor.
Another suggestion is to suggest that someone else is making you ask them about getting a brain scan. For example, Do NOT say: “I think I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome.” Instead, say: “My best friend wanted me to ask you about something. I don’t even think it’s a thing, but she thinks I might have something called EDS. Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, I think? I don’t know. It’s probably rare. But have you heard of it? Do you think I might have it?”
Other examples: "My husband made me come here to get this chest pain checked out." or "My roommate said I had to ask you about having my thyroid levels checked." This approach puts you on the same side as the doctor — the two of you against your loved one.
Phrase it so that someone else is worried about you and insisting you getting the scan. Best if you can pretend it's a man and then have a man with you at the appt pretending that he insisted you come.
No. 1538861
>>1538814Anon
>>1538850 gave you some good advice so I just wanted to tell you, while I understand your concerns, it doesn't have to be something as serious as a brain tumor, I had the same thing and I was also scared shitless and my first thought was also that there's something wrong with my brain, like a stroke. I just wake up and I looked at the lamp across my room an I saw it lying down and standing up, again and again, it couldn't stabilize. I wasn't able to walk straight, I felt like I was moving even when I sat on my bed, I felt like I was about to vomit too. It turned out I had bacterial labyrinthitis. It can develop without any pain in your ear and it can last from 1 week to like 2 months if not treated, especially if it's bacterial, and symptoms maybe be either light or severe. I was prescribed specific antibiotics and it stopped after like 4 days, but I had to take the antibiotics for 10 days. I really hope you will get examined as soon as possible and it won't be anything serious!
No. 1538867
File: 1680390950115.png (14.89 KB, 475x340, rollercoaster.png)
I quite literally do not know how to show human emotion, especially but not limited to happy ones. I had to force myself to not make many facial expressions when I was young, so now in situations where most people would naturally emote I have to force it sometimes. You know how at theme parks and such they take photos of you on the rides? There are literally photos of me on a rollercoaster with a completely blank expression. Not even throwing up my hands. I'm human though of course, so sometimes I have genuine reactions. I've thought about practicing in the mirror but that would be too fucking embarrassing.
No. 1538871
>>1538811>>1538813I'm so sorry that you are feeling this way. It's natural to feel overwhelmed and exhausted, but please try to find something that brings you comfort and joy in these difficult times. You are worth more than you think.
I understand how difficult it must be for you to feel so helpless and unable to make a change in your life. You don't need to offer positive qualities to world. Given the horrible things that happen on the regular, one of the best things a person can do is not make the world a worst place.
No. 1538877
>>1538867>>1538870You just sound autistic. It's a normal symptom of autism to not be able to express emotion well.
You could also be a psychopath, or schizophrenic, they have the same problem. But I feel like if you were, you wouldn't be worrying about this.
>I've thought about practicing in the mirror but that would be too fucking embarrassing.If you can get over your embarrassment, this is actually a good idea.
No. 1538883
>>1538847Sorry for the long blogpost but I grew up really sheltered so I was scared of everything and I wasn't allowed to play video games so when I started playing games I felt very similar to you. I would feel my heart race during combat and I wouldn't enjoy the experience. What helped me to ease into combat video games where playing pausable real-time games(where you can pause combat at anytime and get an overview over where the enemy is and you can get some time to think over your attack and heal your characters and so on, so it doesn't feel so overwhelming because the game gives you the opportunity to observe whats going on) and turn-based combat games(where your characters and the enemy characters takes turns attacking each other. That way you get some time to think over your next move since the enemy cant attack until you have attacked). That being said while I'm not as bothered by combat anymore I still have some games where I never finished the boss fight because bosses can be intimidating(specially in old turn-based rpgs). I also still struggled with combat in open world games, it doesnt feel scary to me anymore like it used to but I get stressed and forget what buttons to press. What helped me with this was not rpgs, but rhythm games. Rhythm games are good at making you familiar with a controllers/keyboard layout and teaching you how to response quickly to a prompt
But regardless even though I'm good at rhythm games I still fail at open-world combat because the stress makes my brain short-circuit. Alternatively try playing a Souls or RE game with a friend who is good at video games. Whenever I want to try a game that has a combat system I'm not familiar with I play it with my friend who is very good at lighting the atmosphere so I feel less stress, plus I can just hand over the controller to her whenever I start to feel too frustrated. Also it's important to note that music plays a huge part in game design. If a game doesn't rely too much on music clues then just mute the game and put on a playlist of your favourite songs during combat, it will ease the adrenaline that you would normally feel during combat and make it feel less scary.
All that being said, you shouldn't force yourself into playing something you are not comfortable with. If you decide that combat-driven games just aren't for you then don't play them and ignore everyone who tries to pressure you into it. There are gaming communities dedicated to comfy games without combat. What ever you decide to do anon, then goodspeed!
No. 1538891
>>1538772>I don't understand why narcissists "like" me. based on your description,
- you sound kind of submissive, like you don't have an aggressive, or even assertive, bone in your body and let other people run relationships.
- you provide an audience. You listen to them as they go on and on spouting their bs. There is nothing narcissists love more than an audience.
>I do something she doesn't like, she literally looks at me like she wants to kill me, with her bulging, creepy eyes. Another moment she can be totally sweet and caring towards me, touching me etc.> talking to me about other people, or passively-aggressively mocking me and criticizing me, then playing sweet with me, and then making me feel inferior again etc. It fucks with my brainBeing cruel then sweet then cruel then sweet is a very good way to manipulate non autists and get them acting the way you want to get avoid the cruelty. Sounds like your autism protects you from this, from craving her approval, even though it messes with your head, so congrats.
You want some advice? Stop hanging out with people like this as soon as they reveal themselves. Don't keep associating with them, tell them to fuck off/that you don't befriend two-faced liars/that you are too busy to do X/do a slow fade, whatever feels comfortable.
With this particular girl, I'd advise a slow fade, or grey rock technique, because she sounds like she could really fuck with your work life, if you piss her off, by smearing you to your other co-workers and ruining your reputation at work. Narcissists are really good at ruining other people's reputation.
Also, consider reading some books on assertiveness, taking an assertiveness class.
No. 1538896
>>1538847i can't play any video games at all unless i have some form of guide. the only one i got through was ib and my favorite game is fran bow but i can only play so long on my own i much prefer watching someone else do it for me. i'm ridiculously bad at them anyway so i'll save myself the embarrassment, frustrations and fears.
i feel sort of the same as you, i get so overwhelmed i can't play anymore and a big part of it is anxiety. i tried playing
animal crossing wild world kek and i literally quit the game after the first thing
tom nook told me to do which was make friends. i couldn't do it and i didn't want to "disappoint him" either so i quit legitimately stressed. i can't even play minecraft unless it's strictly on creative mode. that said i somehow could play roblox obstacle courses but only if there was no one else in the game or no one was interacting with me at all
No. 1539006
File: 1680399620900.gif (1.91 MB, 540x304, 462fd89649d21af492d1deda1f2bf8…)
I have an extremely important assignment that counts as my exam which I have not begun writing. I also have this book I want to read, but I decided it would be better to not read the book before I go to bed because that time could be better spend on writing my assignment. But then decided that I was too tired. But before going to bed I made the stupid decision to turn on my computer so I could at least find some sources for my assignment. But instead of doing that I ended up being a sperg on tumblr and going trough the tags of my favourite plays and before I knew it 3 hours had passed. It's now 4am, I have not slept, I have not done any leisure reading or any productive school reading. why do i keep doing this to myself
No. 1539021
>>1539006>>1539008I feel the same, nona. My internships gave me a taste of what could be (the free weekends and money to buy dumb shit) and it just made me more anxious to be free.
We will both graduate and have fun weekends!
No. 1539028
File: 1680403676310.gif (885.62 KB, 640x640, you-burned-my-house-you-burned…)
I just want to drop a ton of money on stupid things to make me happy, it's stupid and hate supporting a capitalist lifestyle but it's the only thing I feel like I'll be happy with atm. Stuff I've been wanting to get but keep depriving myself of to save it all for the future when I don't know if I'll be alive next month. I want to eventually move on from my situation and this isn't going to help me in the long run
No. 1539142
>>1538313Thank you, this is very helpful
>>1538368>>1538377I am not diagnosed but there is a possibility that I am on the spectrum. I have autistic family members. I always felt like an alien observing humanity from an outsider's perspective the way that people watch animals in zoos. I also have other symptoms of autism like having weird specific hyperfixations and intense sensory issues (part of the reason I have an ED is because I literally cannot stand the feeling of skin touching skin, I have to put a pillow under my arm when I sleep because if I don't I can feel a fat roll forming under my armpit)
>We are able to do the math pretty early and understand that boys can like girly things and girls can like boyish things and it doesn't fucking matter, society is retarded. But that doesn't change the fact we still have dysphoria.This is another obstacle for me. Every time I try to talk to radfems about my dysphoria, they tell me that I don't have to be a man to like stereotypically "masculine" things. I already know this and even if I didn't, acknowledging this wouldn't be an automatic quick fix. Besides, it's not about not wanting to be a woman, it's about wanting to be a man.
No. 1539156
File: 1680422209866.jpg (115.74 KB, 769x1024, cokehead.jpg)
it's always poor bella hadid, yolanda ruined her body image and not fuck bella hadid, like seriously fuck her for helping to ruin the body image of young girls everywhere just so she can live her 2014 pro ana tumblr dream of being the best anorexic. she dresses like a teen on purpose to appeal to gen z and young girls into fashion. she plays into the "i love eating" model meme and its annoying as fuck considering in reality she is a coked out anemic looking lipoed cunt who is actively influencing our teenage girls to starve themselves, and yes she knows what she's doing, and fuck her for being so narcissistic and having so little self awareness as to not break the cycle. anorexia is horrible and deadly and bella hadid deserves just as much flack as eugenia cooney if not more for glamourizing her starving body to such a wide and impressionable audience.
No. 1539203
>>1539156i feel like the people who claim that celebs don't have an impact on teengirls body image, self esteem and behavior, are the same people who also claim shooting games don't make teenboys violent…
literally anything can influence kids badly.
we know that gigi and bella are
victims of their mom but now they're close to 30 and negative "inspiration" for a million 15yos.
>>1539187no idea what your comment is supoosed to mean, sounds like you accuse her of being jealous..?
point is that all female celebs are skinny but there is a difference between simply being thin like most actresses and not really mentioning this or claiming you eat clean and workout, versus being a walking skeleton who has to showcase her hipbones during every wheather while claiming you love burgers and have never seen a surgeon in your life… it's their behavior that matters, somebody like emma watson also doesn't weigh much more but nevertheless dresses and acts in a way that likely never influenced one of her kid fans badly.
No. 1539273
File: 1680444628089.jpeg (43.57 KB, 265x470, 0033.jpeg)
>>1539179nonnas here unironically wanting women to cover up because they think seeing hipbones induces a mental disorder kek
No. 1539300
File: 1680446052941.jpg (75.99 KB, 1190x1280, D21Cgl7WsAAvjCt.jpg_large.jpg)
If I put on make up and fitting clothes and did my hair and wasn't anaemic and vitamin D deficient, I would mog the wast majority of people. Straight women and men, fags and lesbians, white, black, asian, stacies and chads, doesn't matter. If I converted my autism to normisms, it would be over for all normies. I have enormous potential, but I will probably never unleash it. So you're lucky. Remember that.
No. 1539305
>>1539179thissss i fucking hate when anorexia is viewed as a superficial auto induced quirk were you starve to look sKiNnYy and not the refuse of life drive because traumatic shit happened to you.
>>1539156cunt
No. 1539311
File: 1680446757928.jpeg (78.63 KB, 602x602, main-qimg-341b25ecdc005e2cd008…)
>>1539303You go Stacy I admire your absolute ability to put up with all of that and control your senses, I'm going mad from fabrics touching my body or feeling anything on my face, including make up, and if I try to do anything with my hair, like get a cute hairstyle, I feel like my scalp hurts etc. My autism is just too strong. But you go mog those normies!
No. 1539318
claiming
>>1539199while typing like
>>1539305…
No. 1539334
>>1539318Im not in an academic enviroment to type out of my internet informal way and also im in the vent thread. Do you want me to type correctly? Fine. And I will repeat myself: anorexics have an importan trauma underlying that makes them act in such a way against our self-preservation instincts denying the life drive and embracing unhealthly the death drive. Maybe the conscious justify this behaviour by "I want to be skynny like x celebrity" but in the unconscious the motives are very different and trauma rooted.
To conceive anorexia as a disease with superficial motives is to ignore the complexity of it and only produce harm. Also why do you think that women are more affected by it? not because we are dumb superficial people, its because or bodies are the only thing that we have control in a patriarchal society and thus we use it to express our negative feelings in an autodestructive way.
Thats enough maturity for you?
No. 1539348
>>1539339Im not a native english speaker so I don't get much of the semiotic clues in my speech.
>>1539344also for both of you, my opinions are not only based on personal and second hand experience, its based too in reading different authors with different perspectives. Maybe psychoanalysis isn't of the taste of you two but it sure has a lot of answers to human behaviour.
What, do you think that anorexia exists solely because beauty standards imposed to woman? or what is wrong with searching for more complex answers to this behaviour? Or what is wrong about what I said and how it is in reality?
No. 1539353
>>1539340But if that is the absolute ultimate answer then why not all women have anorexia? and why is more cronic and extreme in some women? and what if anorexia is used to archive the opposite of beauty? like many sexual abuse
victims do?
No. 1539362
Bella herself kind of proves the point wrong already, she's also influenced by false idols:
>starves herself because of her mom>gets ps to look like her fav Carla BruniNobody is safe from being incluenced into sick behavior
>>1539348>Maybe psychoanalysis isn't of the taste of you two but it sure has a lot of answers to human behaviour.lmao now you just sound even more like a kid (or like a reddit moid)
>>1539356yes, for example in ancient china court officials starved themselves to death because the emperor favored skinny people
empress sissi of austria was also ana and wanted the tiniest waist and everybody admired her for it
all
victims of sick beauty standards and ideals, just like women and girls (and some moids) nowadays
No. 1539372
>>1539354Alright. It really is just the simple fact that not everybody with an eating disorder has trauma or suicidal tendencies. Other factors can also lead into it, such as OCD and a need to adhere to certain rituals, autism/sensory issues around food or even a "special interest" in calorie counting or nutrition, catastrophic thinking, personality disorders tying into self-destructive behaviors as a way to either self-punish or punish those around them, having to stick to certain rules because it's quite literally their job and best current chance of making money (typically the case in Hollywood and the modelling industry, especially with child stars), a strong desire to be cared for/fawned over and ill, etc. And yes, sometimes it really is just a girl or woman who thinks she's ugly if she's not skinny, notices that restricting is "working", and just doesn't stop doing it because she's addicted to the high of weight loss to the point that it supercedes health.
From reading your posts, it almosts seems like you have a need to push reasoning that resonates with you personally to the entire subject, and it bothers you when a certain other type of reason is acknowledged. None of these are "less
valid" reasons behind anorexia. Multiple paths can lead to the same place.
No. 1539381
>>1539372I really like this reply more! But what if we add psychological concepts like conscious and unconscious, life drive and death drive? I think they expand more the picture of what anorexia is how works in our minds. And yeah, trauma may not be the only stem for such a complex disease but attributing it to only beauty standars is reductionist. So we can agree that anorexia has different stems with different
triggers and an important social component?
And yeah, in my last replies I focused in the approach more familiar for me, the trauma related. I don't think that are less
valid reasons behind anorexia but if you only atribute it to beauty standars and social norms really falls flat and more if you deny things like the existence and influence of the conscious and unconscious like another replies did.
>>1539369Also you have endless anecdotic evidence like what this anon share about her experience with anorexia that contradicts the simplis analysis of this
>>1539362 anon
No. 1539484
File: 1680461860573.jpg (120.83 KB, 900x506, 045-merry-christmas-mr-lawrenc…)
Today I'm so sad from a celebrity death and someone I was not close to but liked a lot. I know its useless but NONNA FRIEND PLZ CONTACT ME BACK, we talked about 2 clowns playing tricks last times and I really really like you.
No. 1539490
>>1539482Ok but should I insist on paying for the book or just thank him? We've been talking to each other for like 2 weeks and only about politics, movies, religion and similar shit and literally
never about anything personal, we are basically strangers, it's just weird. Also I think the guy is an autist like me, so maybe he simply doesn't understand it's inappropriate?? I don't know
No. 1539502
>>1539486I struggle pretty severely with binge eating too, the only way to stop it is to force myself to sleep.
I hate when trauma and stress cause eating disorders. Hope this helps, nonna.
No. 1539517
>>1539187>>1539179i do not care if a celebrity is skinny at all. not all eating disorders are anorexia, most aren't. most young girls who struggle with disordered eating most likely have an undiagnosed form of OSFED or BDD. i have spent several years on ed spaces and most of them are just young girls who have their minds fucked by celebrity and social media. the spike in eds among young girls since the rise of the internet is no coincidence.
>>1539203OP of the bella post. this is exactly what i meant by my post. her flaunting her disorder and making her entire brand about her starving body is just fucked. skinny people are not a problem to me in media or anywhere, but when your entire identity if your ed and it's being normalized, then you are actively harming people.
No. 1539556
Sometimes I feel so alone in this world.
I have a healthy and long relationship. I have long friendships too.
But I always feel like no one would truly know me at all, like no one can understand how deep my pain goes.
I see no point in living because I lost the only person that knew me like nobody else, and she’s not coming back because death doesn’t work this way.
Since she died, I knew I would live without a purpose and without a meaning and that’s what’s happening to me. Problem is that too much time has passed now and even when I search for help, I don’t truly think it’s working.
Pills and therapy can only make you go that far but then I have to find a will I don’t have.
I don’t want to live without her. I don’t want to wake up for the rest of my life knowing she’s not here, all my questions unanswered and all the things I didn’t say when I had the time.
And of course people could tell me how she would have wanted me to live a happy life and such but I can only think that I will never, ever hug her again, because she’s just nothing more than ashes.
And I knew it would happen. Every time we argued, when I went to spend time with other people, even when I took a nap instead of being by her side, I knew some day she wouldn’t be here.
We only talked about this one time. Of course she could see how depressed I was, and she told me that she wouldn’t want me to stop everything just to mourn and that I should move on. All I could do at that time was to look at her and ask her how could she live if she lost me. And she couldn’t answer, of course.
My biggest phobia was to lose her. She was everything. I know that’s something that people tell specially when someone is long gone but it was real for me since the first day. I would never, ever love anyone like I loved her, and no one has ever loved me the same way, unconditionally. And I lost her. She’s not here anymore. And I can’t try to sugar coat it, tomorrow I will wake up and she won’t be here, even if I start talking out loud. She’s. Not. Here.
I’m still having panic attacks more than 8 years later because my mind can’t cope with the pain.
I’m sorry for my rambling. I tried so many times to explain this to everyone and it’s not worth it at this point. Nothing is.
No. 1539563
>>1539532You're right anon, I'm gonna do that
I hate men fuck I had the same situation a few months ago, I was talking to my coworker about anime and video games and I was so happy to have someone irl who shares my love for specific titles and then he invited me for a dinner and I refused and it became awkward between us ever since. Now this guy, it was the first person I met here able to have deeper and more intellectual conversations with me and we were talking about philosophy books and shit and I admired his intellect and I wanted to be his friend and he had to ruin it and now I will never feel comfortable around him again. Men just can't see women as people because befriending a woman for nothing than intellectual qualities just doesn't exist to them, they just want to be in a relationship with you or sex you, they never care for women unless they're potential partners, their sisters or mothers or their male friends' girlfriends. That's it.
No. 1539569
File: 1680466851265.jpg (24.33 KB, 400x400, daw.jpg)
This girl has been asking me for help with a college project for the past two hours and even though I usually like to help because it's my favorite class, I can't find a way to tell her I don't want to help anymore because I've been spending the whole day shitting my guts out after taking laxatives for a transvaginal ultrassound I have tomorrow and the last thing I want to do right now is teaching a college kid how to calculate means.
No. 1539609
>>1539511>someone bought a sofa bed from me and she complained about it smelling of smoke and asks for a partial refundIf you smoke and it smells like smoke, you should definitely offer a partial refund if that was not stated in the description. It's a no brainer. The other two situations suck.
t. long time seller
No. 1539630
>>1539556I can't imagine the level of pain that must be. Anon, it's so rare to love that much and remember with such intensity. What you two had must've been the real thing, what a blessing to have had. I'm so sorry that you're separated now.
I honestly have nothing to say, but I sincerely wish that the pain isn't a constant burden. I hope that one day, you're back together, and that you find warmth in other people whilst cherishing her memory. I am sending you a big warm hug that you'll just have to imagine, and proud of you for having the strength to live with this pain.
No. 1539632
>>1539556I can't imagine the level of pain that must be. Anon, it's so rare to love that much and remember with such intensity. What you two had must've been the real thing, what a blessing to have had. I'm so sorry that you're separated now.
I honestly have nothing to say, but I sincerely wish that the pain isn't a constant burden. I hope that one day, you're back together, and that you find warmth in other people whilst cherishing her memory. I am sending you a big warm hug that you'll just have to imagine, and proud of you for having the strength to live with this pain.
No. 1539633
>>1539556I can't imagine the level of pain that must be. Anon, it's so rare to love that much and remember with such intensity. What you two had must've been the real thing, what a blessing to have had. I'm so sorry that you're separated now.
I honestly have nothing to say, but I sincerely wish that the pain isn't a constant burden. I hope that one day, you're back together, and that you find warmth in other people whilst cherishing her memory. I am sending you a big warm hug that you'll just have to imagine, and proud of you for having the strength to live with this pain.
No. 1539636
>>1539556I can't imagine the level of pain that must be. Anon, it's so rare to love that much and remember with such intensity. What you two had must've been the real thing, what a blessing to have had. I'm so sorry that you're separated now.
I honestly have nothing to say, but I sincerely wish that the pain isn't a constant burden. I hope that one day, you're back together, and that you find warmth in other people whilst cherishing her memory. I am sending you a big warm hug that you'll just have to imagine, and proud of you for having the strength to live with this pain.
No. 1539681
File: 1680477457619.gif (1.61 MB, 270x368, external-content.duckduckgo.co…)
It's still such a tough pill for me to swallow that I won't have my own place anytime soon, after I was delusional enough to think I could for the past couple of years. Rent is climbing and my wages just aren't enough, and I realized how much help my grandpa needs and there's no way he can live alone safely. I don't make much, but it's a comfortable living situation since my bills are minuscule here. Even so, I yearn for sweet solitude. I want to be able to parade around in my panties, to never have anyone calling for me, to never have my diet affected by someone else's picky eating, to never come home to a mess to clean up, to decorate how I want and not have towels and rugs and shower curtains I've carefully curated to be thrown out and/or replaced without warning, to not have to hide my things for fear of them getting ruined, to never have anything cluttering my space that I don't want. I know I will look back on this time of my life fondly though, so I'm trying to be mindful and practice gratitude.
No. 1539740
won't lie i hate when people say, "I'm so ugly omg i'm so ugly" no the fuck you aren't. And no i'm not unvalidating you or whatever.
You just aren't, IM fucking ugly, i'm fat, i have bad skin, i'm built like a big bodied ugly woman.
I AM WHAT UGLY LOOKS LIKE. Not you sally whose thin, with nice skin, sure you may have a big nose or some acne spots, maybe your hair is too thin or something but you aren't fucking ugly.
I am. I'm ugly. I think I unlocked a new way to cope with my agrophobia and get out, I need to truly train myself to view myself as deformed. Being as ugly as I am, while being fat is my personal deformity. I need to tell myself, "anon you are ugly, nobody cares about you, just go on with life. Who cares if someone thinks you are ugly or fat? Wonders why you have dark skin on the side of your ugly pie face? You are ugly. You need to get the fuck on with life or die".
And in a way it brings me comfort. I'm ugly and it doesn't matter anymore. I've been agrophobic since…2014 and I believe it picked up as extreme in..2016 or so. I have never worked, I've only gotten fatter and more mentally ill.
Maybe I should get a therpist, but I do know I have to brace myself. It's a way to cope. I'm ugly and I can do something. I'm just a drain on everyone.
No. 1539832
>>1539825I made one single post saying there were tifs in the thread, but never called anyone a bitch. I got called plenty of names myself, though.
>>1539821I think it’s still important to get their perspective, they’re helpful in highlighting the dangers of transition and didn’t deserve what they went through. Doesn’t change the fact a lot of them are annoying though.
No. 1539879
>>1539832As the TIF who accidentally blogposted (the no1curr redtext) and a resident cow, you have my word I left the thread when told to fuck off, and it helped clear my head. I think I'd benefit by not discussing semantics while on one hour of sleep. What I said made no sense, but in an autist's sleep deprived brain it seems plausible in the moment.
I think detransitioners have a very good reason to discuss the dangers of transitioning, but them acting like just because it was right for them doesn't mean it's right for others, is retarded. Trooning out should be the very last resort, when all options were exhausted, for full grown adults, and nothing else, but it should not be banned. Risperidone, for example, worked for me when all therapy options were exhausted with little to no results. But that finally did the trick. I feel like detransitioners would benefit by realizing all things have nuance, as should other troons.
That's why I like the radfems here. Outside of /2x/ and the tranny threads, they're usually very insightful and help me learn both about radical feminism, and of their takes on everything. I genuinely love the nonnas here and want the best for them, even if they disagree with me on some things.
No. 1539904
this is so stupid but i hate myself so much.
for some context, i'm disabled… actually disabled, i had major surgery on my legs when i was 10 years old and that was pretty much a predictor for the rest of my life. so i can't do a lot physically, which is bad enough. but on top of that, i have a lot of foods i physically can't eat, the details of which mean it's hard to eat healthy. i try. i try so fucking hard. but trying to stay healthy when i'm like this is sisyphean. long story short, i'm a little heavy. i'm not obese, but it's enough to be seen. and i hate it. and i hate myself for it. and i don't know what to do. nothing i try seems to work. every time i look in the mirror i feel disgusted. i'm not pretty even outside of that, i know because i used to be thin and i wasn't pretty then. maybe i was too thin though, that was back when i never wanted to eat at all. but even so. i don't think i've ever looked at myself and thought i was pretty. maybe 'decent' at times, in really good photos, but never any better than that.
it makes me feel hopeless. especially regarding potential relationships. at least i'm not into men, i know how they get about womens' appearances, but sometimes i don't think any woman would want me either. i have issues even beyond what i've said here and it all just crushes me. why did i have to be born with such a fucked up body and a fucked up brain?
i don't know. i just wanted to say this. my next therapy appointment isn't for a while and i feel really alone right now. if you actually read all of this then thanks. i appreciate it.
No. 1539930
File: 1680514235792.jpg (88.14 KB, 680x654, 1677510901120.jpg)
I skipped class today and am now spiraling into one of those "i'm a piece of shit, a disappointment, a low-life, don't even deserve to live" moods
No. 1539950
>>1539948Do you live in the US,
nonny? Apparently there is this thing called "hard water" where minerals can buildup on your scalp and cause hair loss. Just wtf
No. 1539952
>>1539950No I’m from Europe.
>>1539951Yeah, I definitely thought about it being covid or vaccine related. Didn’t want to get the tinfoil hat out though, but is it even tinfoil anymore that there was something fucky about covid etc.
No. 1539958
>>1539948>>1539952>>1539951>>1539941Cut gluten from your diets, gluten sensitivity and celiac disease are being activated by covid and the vaccine. One of my symptoms before diagnosis was thinning hair and losing huge amounts. Be wary of cross contamination cause depending on your sensitivity levels even the tiniest bit of cross contamination can fuck you over.
I started seeing differences immediately upon going gluten free and my hair stopped falling out within a couple weeks. Took longer for my hair to be full again. But if I get hit with cross contaminated food I will lose a decent amount of hair in the shower in addition to many other symptoms.
No. 1539975
File: 1680522480582.jpeg (12.74 KB, 400x246, C65C8E07-461C-4AC4-A1A8-ADC3F3…)
I’m having a fucking awful week, when will this end? Is mercury in gatorade again?
No. 1539980
>>1539904Don’t be so hard on yourself
nonnie, I’m not even disabled and I’m fat as shit. And I know it’s hard not to fixate on appearance but being attractive isn’t the most important thing in the world.
No. 1539988
>>1539958Oh god those ass suckers gave me celiac disease I knew it was a bad idea to get the vax. REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Can confirm my hair is coming back after going Gluten free. My moons on my fingernails just went away though so I feel like I have a lot more problems, it’s like I’m falling apart. I bought iron, b12 and selenium. My blood draw came out ok but I’m obviously not ok. REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I’m so mad
No. 1539991
>>1539904Don’t worry,
nonnie, women are honestly different. Like I’m not pretty or fit and lots of women in college have been interested in me, because what matters is just you, this time is literally, like as long as you’re yourself, a woman will love you because you will be her best person ever.
So don’t be hard on yourself, just try to find a balance, maybe go to a nutritionist or an endocrinologist so you can actually know what is it that your body actually needs.
No. 1539998
Does anyone else have parents who try to control you over the smallest thing and then lose their shit and want to destroy your life if you try to express that you don't want to do whatever it is they want that is inconsequential, all of the time?
For example, my parents constantly DEMAND constantly when I'm allowed to see my friends, when I'm allowed to stay out, when I "NEED TO" to go back to my MY OWN house after going out with my friends, or that I "NEED TO" go see them by x time and stay away from my own house or friends, etc. If I try to insist that this is rude, they start screaming and acting like I'm out of control for not doing every single thing they want. It's not as if I am putting off an obligation for it, but they still act like I am if I tell them they need to respect my boundaries. I don't tell them what to do, ever.My parents were barely around when I was a child and teen and kicked me out of the house all of the time, abused me, caused constant chaos. I was usually living with my exes or my girlfriends because my parents did not want to be parents. Now suddenly they want to act like they've always been dedicated parents who somehow have the right to control everything I do and when I do it, what friendships I'm allowed to have… It's really getting fucking insane. I'm going to be 30 soon. What the fuck is this.
No. 1540016
>>1539998Yes, I grew up with a mother like this. We barely speak because she'll start trying to boss me around long distance. She used to forbid me to see a doctor about xyz issues because it's bad and she heard from a friend/TV it will give me cancer. One of these was the actual HPV vaccine, so by the time I had control over my own life I was too old to get it.
The only solution is cutting them off. It sucks because you'll be faced with people who come from normal families with nice parents, and you'll feel jealous, but that's the only way to make them stop.
No. 1540026
File: 1680528693362.jpg (61.51 KB, 826x710, jdfUMds.jpg)
playing otome games make me feel happy while im reading the story but then i look at irl scrotes and i feel sad that ill never feel that kind of happiness because theyre all retarded animals with only sex in their minds. ive been liking marius from tears of themis and when i remember no irl moid will treat me like he treats the game's mc unless hes desperate for sex, i just get so unmotivated about dating, it's starting to creep into my mind while reading his stories too so i cant even enjoy the game in peace. i feel like ill never find a proper man at this point. relevant that i live in a 3rd world country where i cant say women should be equal to men or men should do housework without everyone laughing or arguing against it.
No. 1540030
>>1540026Your pic
triggered me
No. 1540032
>>1540026What otome games are you playing
nonny?
No. 1540046
>>1540029I wish I could just kill myself too
nonnie, I feel like I will never escape my shitty life, I have extreme anxieties and feel like I’m basically retarded.
No. 1540048
File: 1680532866232.gif (658.58 KB, 220x220, 54a35e656r870870.gif)
The biggest blackpill is learning that even the nicest, most talented men still end up dating or marrying a woman decades younger than him at least once, no matter the time period, pre-internet, post-internet, pre-television, no matter if his previous girlfriends/wives were closer in age, no matter if his image is 100% non-sexual, family-friendly, nothing. literally ALL of them, oh my fucking god. even the rumored "gay" "um ackshually it's a PR relationship!1" ones you all lied to me i hate you. some of these "gay" cinnamonrolls were even cheaters (with female mistresses not even male). never google nothin again. never ever ever ever
>even X anon? even my favorite
YES even X
the worst part is i still like some of them but i just can't ignore that aspect of their life. i really wish i could though..my day is ruined again my hopeful dumbass always thinking "maybe this one is the exception this time" nope. never look up anything. just don't. burn all biographies.
No. 1540053
>>1540048Did you also just learn that
Buster Keaton started dating a 19 year old when he was 42? Because that bummed me out
plus the weirdness of her loving “”raising him”” No. 1540063
>>1540059LOL
nonnie rip I can’t believe I guessed it. Sorry it upset you so much, scrotes gonna scrote no matter what sadly.
No. 1540102
File: 1680537348533.jpg (81.92 KB, 719x719, 8fa9a194d8beb3b7d46e8a9c1642d5…)
I was walking home today and some kids told me I look like trash, why are they so mean
No. 1540121
File: 1680538602934.jpeg (89.61 KB, 750x582, EDE52269-F806-4EF3-B8C1-72C5C7…)
NONNY EMERGENCY NONNY what can i do for a cat that is currently!! giving birth outside of my apartment building right now? do i get some water for her after she's done to replenish energy? what can i provide her with? picrel kind of looks like her ( on the right only she has white on her ) and her husband ( actually bonded cats ) who is also laying near her
No. 1540210
>>1540202I told her I think he’s just using that as an excuse to be busy all summer and this is what she texted me.
“No, he’s really focused on work, so I believe him, I met his coworkers, and he’s always reading sale books, I always see his index cards for his pitch. He’s really big on self improvement and productivity”
No. 1540212
>>1540210I feel bad for her naivete but there is nothing more you can say to break her delusion of this man.
She will have her heart broken to learn this lesson. Just be a shoulder for her when the shit hits the fan, or maybe she will keep the drama to herself being too embarassed to admit she was wrong.
No. 1540238
File: 1680550882257.jpg (155.78 KB, 1600x1200, 3QUFUNZ4KTBKW5QA46ZET76RQA.jpg)
>>1540048Is Keanu still safe?
Sometimes I worry about the overabundance of positive PR around scrotes cause it feels like a manufactured mask to bury or hide unsavory bits about them.
No. 1540239
>>1539980>>1539991thank you both, i appreciate it. i guess part of the reason my appearance worries me is because at least i can change that, i can't change what's going on in my head… 'being myself' scares me because people just get annoyed when i do that. i'm autistic you see. professionally diagnosed, to be clear, there's literally no question on the matter. and although i've improved a lot i still occasionally find myself rambling on about my current fixation and it stresses me out. i know eventually i'll probably find someone who likes to listen to things like that but right now the idea of coming across anyone who actually wants to hear me going on and on about a politically-charged spy-genre video game series feels very far off. lol.
but i'll try to not be so hard on myself. thank you for the encouragement, really. mental illness makes it hard to keep things in proportion but getting an outside perspective really helps.
No. 1540240
>>1540158I want to outdo my enemies but my enemies keep outdoing me or refusing to play the game
Spite and the desire to outdo those who've abused and degraded me is one of the few antidotes keeping me alive
No. 1540241
>>1540238I have met and heard stories of industry adjacent people who claim he's a good person… the only weird thing is him having a tumultuous relationship with one of his girlfriends from the nineties who had a miscarriage. I don't think he ever outright abused her but they definitely had issues. Outside of that I've never heard stories of him being as
abusive and scrotey as 99% of male actors with similar good publicity junkets. He might be one of the few safer ones
No. 1540344
File: 1680560125548.gif (2.85 MB, 498x356, persona-persona3.gif)
Just got a rejection email from a company after a 2nd interview. I was so close and yet didn't make it. Looking for a job is so hard. I'm so tired nonnies, so tired…
No. 1540381
>>1540375It could mean he’s trying to make 200k
in sales meaning he would only take home a percentage of that depending on his commission.
He’s still full of shit though.
No. 1540396
File: 1680568757133.jpeg (417.7 KB, 2048x1356, 55B0CABD-3633-4BBE-B5FF-D99D71…)
HATE THAT ITS HOT AND THE BUGS ARE BACK
HATE HAVING TO COVER MYSELF IN STINKY BUGSPRAY TO GO FOR A MOONLIT WALK
HATE HAVING TO SHOWER AND WASH OFF THE BUGSPRAY BEFORE BED CAUSE I PREFER MORNING SHOWERS
REEEEEEE the only consolation is at least they have those lemon eucalyptus sprays that are approved by the CDC and actually work well and I’m not allergic to them like I am to DEET
No. 1540414
File: 1680571824789.jpeg (97.45 KB, 1170x1405, 719ED21F-65A1-49A9-AAF1-00AAF5…)
I don’t know where I should post this, but fuck this nasty troon and his nasty bong and his madams apple shitting up one of the only decent female subs that I hadn’t seen troons infest yet. Fucking nasty.
No. 1540503
File: 1680585774694.png (637.38 KB, 1600x1200, ibra26caviesfun038.png)
>>1540501I've seen it pointed out online that gen x looks their age, gen z looks old, and millennials either look 15 years older or 15 years younger. the more i observe those around me the more i see it
No. 1540536
File: 1680590108864.jpg (3.45 KB, 225x225, catdisgust.jpg)
i forgot how men stink SO fucking much, fuck damn. it's going to be a long year commuting to work.
No. 1540548
File: 1680590999119.jpg (11.42 KB, 500x500, s-l500.jpg)
>>1540514I had this old blindfold laying around and realized it's basically the same thing as those sleeping eyemasks. A proper curtain situation is also important, but if you can't do anything about that I think a sleeping mask is an affordable experiment. I work all kinds of hours and blindfolding myself before sleep has really helped when getting home from night shifts. There are also additional fun things you can do with it.
No. 1540629
File: 1680603131911.png (5.75 KB, 335x292, tumblr_pfgm6psOGA1w90ssno1_400…)
I want to self harm again. I do not self harm since january and before that I was like a year and a half not doing it.
But today i feel so disturbed, so devoid of any happiness or hope for the future that I only want to spend my day in my bed, crying, self harming and taking pills.
No. 1540640
>>1540501that's impossible , men age like fine wine and women hit the wall at 26 /s
yeah I get what you mean, men who let themselves go are just as, if not bad than the woman equivalent
yet they still feel entitled to young hot women lmao
when I had my 10 year highschool reunion the girls looked the same, if not better than when we graduated (mind you a lot of them had at least 1 kid too), it blew my mind. most guys however looked so tired and washed out, it made me sad because they used to be really good looking.
I don't blame men for balding though, that shit is devastating for both men and women and I hope a cure will be found one day
>>1540452>>1540489I was a software engineer, took a break and don't know if I really wanna get back into it
the pay is good and Work from home is comfy but standing o a chair 9-10 hours a day with my eyes in a monitor has ruined my vision
i hate it, i want to go out and enjoy fresh air and my hobbies, not be a fucking modern wage slave, because that's what programming really is
a lot of my former colleagues are still into it, good pay and comfy hours for them, but they lucked out, i know others who are under a lot of pressure and stress
imho there is nothing to be proud of if you're an engineer
and this is coming from someone who used to absolutely love technology
corporations are the devil, don't get me started on how everything is on linkedin and you have to do asskissing to get promoted
No. 1540657
>>1540603it comes off as interesting, willing to discover other things, or having experienced them, but i wholeheartedly agree with your post, not that i like to say
inside that much, but i just like my place and don't mind mostly staying here forever.
No. 1540658
>>1540634funny how that goes, for me it's inaudible, i find it really pointless, i like most sounds i think, some more than others but none come to mind as unbearable (besides loud mouth sounds perhaps), i suppose scratching can be godly on some surfaces but shitty / meh on others
i looooove scissors sound by the way, and i guess lotion on mic too, or good tapping
No. 1540815
>>1540803>mid 30snonna I don't know if you want a kid or not but either way that is NOT normal but I've seen it happen many times, if marriage is super important to you he needs to be given an ultimatum
related to this, I'm super jealous of those couples that meet,date, then get married all in the spam of 2-3 years
No. 1540817
>>1540803I say this lovingly, nona.
If he doesn’t want to get married and you have to pretty much beg him to do it, what makes you think the actual marriage will go much better?
No. 1540824
>>1540817He's a great partner in almost every other way, though.
>>1540815I wouldn't say it's "super important" and in fact I didn't care until this year, when I turned 35. I've been having a bit of crisis over aging. I don't want kids or anything.
>>1540818He's an engineer, it's not unprecedented but I do think it's unlikely
No. 1540880
>>1540871I'll be honest, I cried a little reading your reply. While I am unfortunately beyond obese atm (it wasn't so bad until something traumatic happened 2 years ago) and you're completely right that it's a coping mechanism. There's a lot right now that's making me anxious and stressing me out, and I deadass don't know how to cope unless I'm gorging myself on food.
And you're right, I should just take it day by day for now and not worry about the bigger picture (aka losing weight) for a moment.
No. 1540881
>>1540853Nona your body is a beautiful complex vessel for your consciousness, don't let society's indoctrination do that to you.
As an aside, if you think so lowly of yourself what do you think of people the same size/fatter than you? Also worthless? I don't know what size you are but i'm assuming it's not morbidly obese.
No. 1540887
File: 1680632148649.png (19.78 KB, 448x337, C05AF171-9E61-4BF4-BC20-BA1405…)
I hate my garbage job and career field. I want to learn software technical writing but I’m so exhausted after working 9-11 hours a day, plus I’m in my thirties and I’m genuinely afraid I don’t have the ability to learn anything new anymore.
No. 1540906
>>1540889reading posts like these and others complaining about flatmates make me even more realize how much I lucked out by inheriting my old grandparents apartment in my old 20s, sure, old furniture, old flat and nothing trendy that zoomers would like, but it's my own place and I don't have to feel like I want to strangle some retarded flatmate on a daily basis
I'm not from the US but the housing problem has gotten bigger worldwide and I can feel your pain, especially the "work to the bone and get nothing in return" , it could be worse , they could work you to the bone and fire you under some retarded pretense, as it happened to me
No. 1540925
>>1540914>This economy legit makes me jealous of some cowsgod i feel you so much
nonnie, twitch thots and ewhores make more in a month that i make in years
sometimes i curse myself for being such a good girl
the inflation is fucking wild and the prices won't stop rising, i am so sick of it
living with parents may be frowned upon but it's so good when it comes to personal finances and maybe even mental health, especially for those who don't like being alone
> I don't think it's possible for my mental health to get even worseI hope it will get better at least a bit in the future, I'm at floating point and I can't allow myself to go lower otherwise I'll crack
No. 1540928
>>1540913Negative- I would be sad and we work together
Positive- I would stop feeling ugly all the time and jealous
No. 1540931
>>1540830Him being an engineer on its own is a redflag. All engineers I've known have been porn addicted mentally ill men who had commitment issues. They also couldn't get laid in highschool or college so they're very likely to chase after women once they earn good money.
If you want marriage, he isn't the kind of guy. Marriage isn't solely for kids, it's like some sort of support for you as well since him dying or leaving you would leave you with money whilst now he can just fuck off and you wouldn't get anything in return of the ten years he stole from you.
No. 1540938
>>1540931He's pretty normal for an engineer.
I'm just not sure if I feel the same way about marriage. We both make 6 figures, its not like I will fall into poverty if he leaves. If he leaves me later, am I entitled to his money? Did he really "steal" anything from me? He pays for a lot of stuff as it is so idk seems fair?
No. 1540942
>>1540938Women in general have a harder time dating or having kids later in life which is why women are the side that'll be compensated financially during divorce. If you don't feel the need, then it's not a necessity, especially if he already pays and you're stable enough on your own.
Why do you want to get married then, if not for the economic advantage, kids or the title?
No. 1540951
>>1540803Why the fuck do you want to even be with someone who is bullshitting you so hard
Sorry but "I don't want to marry you because I might get sued" is incredibly insulting in all its bullshittery
You don't let yourself be bullshitted like that
No. 1540953
>>1540932don't talk to him. sorry to say but he probably already posted them somewhere. get him in trouble legally if at all possible / do what this poster says
>>1540937In my mind personally the point where someone leaks my nudes is not even embarrassing for me anymore, it makes them look way worse than me.
No. 1540969
>>1540931former engineer here and I can confirm A LOT of them have issues, some of them very big issues
>>1540961I have some retarded stories with some engineers that liked me, if you're interested nonna
No. 1540984
File: 1680642345873.png (73.33 KB, 500x375, tumblr_mknk1cDReQ1rp0n56o1_500…)
Eastern is approaching and I'm already fucking done with everything because my mum just told me that I shouldn't be rude to my brother aka not telling him that I do not like it that he shits and pisses all over the toilet seat for example BECAUSE, according to my mum, it could "trigger" him because of his mental problems. So when it happens again, I should tell her so he can explain him not do it, like if he would be damn toddler. She also told me that last time I saw him I was also unnecessary mean to him because I pointed out that he did not wash his hands after taking a shit and just walked out of the bathroom and touched all the food during dinner. When I called him out my mum got mad at me and said I was overreacting. He also tends to not shower himself for days and smells like old sweat and cigarettes, combined with the artificial smell of his energy drinks that he drinks all the damn time. When I still used to live with my brother I was always the one that had to wipe the toilet seat because nobody else bother to clean it up I'm fucking done with his nasty ass. My brother is 26 btw and not autistic or so. Also fuck my mum to give all the excuses for him.
No. 1540986
My cousin has texted a group chat we're in with a few friends about "donating to her puppy fund." She seems to have decided to get one with her current bf (of 2 months), despite the fact that she dropped out of college, moved back home, and is now working at starbucks full time.
She was coddled growing up in terms of how money people gave her and responsibilities they took on for her, and now that she's an adult, and people have tried being more real with her about how things work, she still does not comprehend it. Her previous bf from when she was still in college bought her a baby bunny despite the fact that she a) lived in a dorm and b) had no money/job, just the spending money her family would give her. She had a meltdown when she was told she couldn't bring the bunny back home during breaks because her family has two cats (one of whom has killed small vermin) and a dog (which granted, is very sweet and retarded and ignores squirrels, but you never know).
Our family isn't some sort of redneck animal hoarders either, she just has some mental health issues and refuses to be realistic. She doesn't save money, she dropped out of her college (biology) because she got in to a "top ten" fashion school, which turned out to be an online course. Thankfully she was convinced to take a gap year, and from there, moved back home and is going to community college, which is much better for her. She's a bit of a hypochondriac, and her mental health issues exacerbate actual medical issues. She's had several surgeries for very easily preventable things. She refuses to walk and hardly goes outside besides work and dates, which is troubling when she thinks she's going to get a dog. If, somehow, she's able to get her hands on one, and her family actually lets her bring it home, I can guarantee she'll forget about it after a few months, and her parents will take over.
I think what's the most frustrating is that she's literally not someone with serious problems (like there's no serious obstacles in her life), a lot could be solved by some amount of self-introspection. We grew up together, I know her family, our upbringings were very privileged. Obviously that doesn't mean she can't have mental health issues, but the audacity of some of the things she says makes me so angry. Unironically calling our grandmother "abusive" because she's a no-nonsense old lady in the bible belt who told her to stop making a fuss over "the pasta tasting different" (cousin has ARFID). Not even forcing her to eat it, just to stop acting like a petulant child and mushing it and pushing it away and whining in front of guests. When I got in to a private school on a scholarship during middle school, she insisted on being sent to private school. From there, her family wasted thousands to send her to a private college she was obsessed with, only to drop out. She still insists that she's going to be a designer for high fashion brands in paris and italy (her words not mine), while not knowing how to sew. She's great person, but she has no self awareness and any attempts by our family to push back either don't last very long because it's easier to give in, or wind up in her flipping out, like when she was told to start buying her own gas. I snitched to about her plan to bring the bunny home (her mom didn't even know she had gotten one), and I will 100% do the same for the dog if I see signs that she's actually gonna get it. She fundamentally cannot handle that much responsibility and I refuse to let her subject her family, her well-intentioned bf, and an animal to her own retarded whims.
No. 1540996
File: 1680643636327.jpg (53.44 KB, 540x515, tumblr_d76be42fc52ba390b5b284b…)
Im caught in a pointless waiting for you to Love me and change, Im even supporting you, but day by day I become more hopeless and starting to wait for me to give up on you already.
No. 1540999
>>1540935My face was never in the pictures and I don't have tattoos or anything particularly unique
>>1540937I just called and she said my first step is to call the police. I have a screenshot, the thing is the threat is a follow request from an instagram account that has the threat in the name so there's no proof it's him. I know it's him though because no one else calls me by the name he used and he's been harassing me and my friends/family on all possible platforms
No. 1541000
>>1540989I'm reading some german articles
nonnie where does it say in one they're immigrants?
No. 1541002
>>1540999Same anon my bf is offering to talk to him but I don't think it's a good idea.
I think the ex wants something he left at my house back, we already tried sending it back but it got rejected and came back to us. A family member is trying to resend it right now. Should I not be doing that?
No. 1541003
>>1540994>>1541000their skin color wasn't white, phillipina and a brazilian afaik, before i'm called a xenophobe there are serious problems in europe with the immigrants (not only the muslims)
it pisses me off that they pretended to be worried about the missing girl AFTER they stabbed her and posted themselves dancing on tiktok
this is one of those cases where eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth should be applicable
jesus fucking christ i am livid with rage
No. 1541005
>>1541002Zero contact from any of you.
Only interact through official channels, like the police, court, social services
No. 1541020
Was going to post this in the confessions thread but whatever, this is probably more appropriate
Basically, I gave up a long-distance online relationship, because you know, usual long distance problems. Was honest about it with the guy, he was very understanding about it but obviously felt hurt, and decided to cut me off completely. After that I kind of got attached to a somewhat local moid, we saw each other irl, had sex, was really hoping for something real with him. But nah, he's ghosting me. And now here I am crying about it and missing that online shit. I am officially retarded. I'll just see this as karma and a sign for me to stop fucking around with men.
No. 1541034
File: 1680648190261.jpeg (29.52 KB, 800x534, 835EC2A7-C199-4FAD-B4A2-57B0F9…)
I make more money than I ever had in my life, I am solidly middle class all on my own, and yet it seems I can still never fucking get ahead. Everything’s $100 here, $200 there, $50 here again, and then three days after payday I’m broke again every time
I’m retarded with money I’m not gonna pretend like I’m not but things really do keep fucking coming up and it’s so tiring. I’m even looking for a second job, but no bites so far. Is this just life forever? Should I snag a rich moid to pay off all my credit card debt? What do nonnies
No. 1541048
File: 1680650875440.jpg (41.92 KB, 641x680, tumblr_74552a57d38ec8edb48a8d6…)
>feel sad because not enough male attention
>do anything for male attention
>get male attention
>wtf this is literally worthless
>stop interacting with males
>feel sad
>oh i probably just feel sad because…
>repeat
No. 1541057
File: 1680652175730.jpg (605.55 KB, 2226x1534, 6KAC93U.jpg)
>>1541048Me every month without fail during ovulation. I wasn't even brought up to care about male attention, but biology came and did her thing
No. 1541061
>>1540934Are you the same retard that told an anon in an
abusive relationship to beat up her boyfriend recently? Stop giving this shit tier dangerous advice to women who are obviously dealing with unhinged scrotes, they'd just get beaten to death if they did anything like this
No. 1541099
File: 1680660587453.gif (1.03 MB, 1000x600, flowers-on-december.gif)
I feel so disappointed and not even in the fuckyoucoolchill way. Bitter and sad
No. 1541110
File: 1680662981927.jpg (19.43 KB, 400x400, FAf6gnkWEAgzEym.jpg)
>Gender neutral bathrooms argued for in my school, will be taking over existing bathrooms
>Don't voice agreement, pass along petition without signing, just nod along with the other few women and laugh at jokes against it
>2 classmates sit far away from me today, when put into groups act like they didn't do anything
>3 people sitting in seats not theirs now, pretty sure a TIM is sitting next to me
I stand by what I did, my only regret was not speaking up against it. If the seating change was somehow because someone recognized me and told them, we'll we were friends only by seating choices and common circumstances anyway. If it did happen I guess I'm not getting that club position I only want for experience. Kek what an eventful 2 days
No. 1541115
File: 1680663523947.jpg (17.31 KB, 355x307, fuckit.jpg)
I love the results of dying my hair with henna I just hate the 4+ hour processing time of sitting here with runny shit on my head.
No. 1541139
File: 1680669013756.jpg (49.09 KB, 750x563, shrek-red-eyes.jpg)
>>1537536Everyone is leaving me. My parents, my sister, my best friends, and bf. They're too concerned with their own personal lives to spend time with me or make sacrifices for me. I'm always the one that has to sacrifice something for attention or affection. I'm never anyone's top priority. And whenever they're feeling sad, they always come to me with their problems. But no one cares about how lonely I feel. No one cares
No. 1541152
File: 1680672325118.gif (321.02 KB, 220x223, sushichaeng-reaction.gif)
Fuck I'm so tired of being the one to always reach out to most my friends, whenever I want to chat or hang out I am the one that has to initiate. And it's not like I'm the friend nobody wants to hang out with, we are all very close and they're always exited to see me. They are just fucking awful at getting in touch with others (something they are fully aware of themselves and make notes on at times). But fuck, I could die or disappear and they wouldn't even notice until they get invites to my funeral, and that honestly hurts.
Why are some people just so fucking awful at getting in touch with others? Why always rely on that others will do it for you and then blame everyone else when you lose friends? I'm tbh considering cutting off these people because I can't be bothered anymore, but then I'd just be left with 4 friends.
No. 1541166
File: 1680676429756.jpeg (84.19 KB, 680x656, Fse-GSXXsBIHLrz.jpeg)
Bf went upstate for a group vacation with our friends. I'm going to be joining them all in a week (I am an accursed wagie and must labour) but I'm getting mopey because instead of calling or texting me to let me know he arrived safe he just messaged the group chat at the halfway point to mention he was eating a snack and then got too distracted when he arrived to tell me?? I'm your gf of several years you fuckin bum, at least pretend you miss my clingy ass!!!
No. 1541178
File: 1680679110388.jpeg (57.5 KB, 828x810, 43E42F82-6DF2-459E-A4CD-302419…)
I am way too broke to spend my upcoming check on two major expenses and not being financially stable enough to save up because the debts get higher with each passing day that I just might as well throw in the towel and treat myself to something I can actually afford.
My debts don’t accept payment plans and want the whole amounts in full. I already called and tried to reason with them so fuck it. I’m getting myself tacky discount easter stuff the day after Easter. Give me that sweet bunny and egg decor.
No. 1541182
File: 1680679602078.jpg (13.51 KB, 445x502, EzvJAdaVUAAQpM8.jpg)
one of my only real hobbies (obscure internet thing, think of it as d&d) causes me such stress. it's art-based and i'm constantly getting messages like
>oooh i love your stuff so much!
>oooooh i'm so flattered to even have a crumb of your attention!!!
>ooooh i always have space for you!
but i never interact with these people outside of the table. even then the interactions are clipped, and i can tell i'm usually more excited about them than my partners.
i kind of want to do a hard reset and just wipe all my "friends" from the hobby and move on to something else, because at this point it makes me miserable to see people i've hung around for years form cliques and friendships while i'm still alone, but i don't even know what i'd do. this thing has given me such joy in the past. but the past few years? kek, they've been awful
doesn't help that there are so many gendies fucking everywhere. so i hate them for being that way but i also hate myself for not being able to connect
No. 1541186
>>1540344same lmao
>your application was wonderful! your background was impressive! but we got like 1002349203940234 other applicants and well ^__^" ! oopsie woopsiei need money quick too. but it's a good thing i live at home still or i'd be utterly fucked
No. 1541196
File: 1680681609391.jpg (13.95 KB, 342x508, 1628123033598.jpg)
>>1541182Is it something like arpgs by chance, because I'm in the same boat
nonnie. I've tried to move on to actual DnD but I find it kind of boring with strangers and not people I care about. I'm sick of people not actually giving a shit about me in my current hobby the way I do them though kek, it's all so performative.
No. 1541202
File: 1680682349589.png (190.41 KB, 720x540, template-drowning-high-five-0c…)
>>1541196it is something like arpgs yeah.
>it's all so performative.and this strikes a real chord with me. i mean, i wouldn't even feel this bad if it wasn't for the nigh-constant sweet-talking; it feels kind of like picrel? or that they're taking me for a gullible retard…or even handling me with kid gloves for whatever reason.
like man, i know you don't really enjoy me that much. if you did, we'd hang out more! there wouldn't be awkward tags in the server to your friends about playing with me. and these tags wouldn't get responded to with nonsense like "um i'm way too shy to speak to
nonnie tehe" while they're speaking to everyone else in the group, new faces absolutely included…
you don't need to "be nice". just be honest so i don't get my hopes up
No. 1541207
File: 1680683278189.png (42.9 KB, 569x210, toxiccloud.png)
>>1541202I feel you
nonnie… that really sucks. It's the worst feeling too, because you know these people won't care if you fell off the face of the Earth despite how much time and care you might have spent in their group. I used to be a big hypeman for other people's ideas, writing, and art. I got burnt out because of this same reason - it really hurt.
Honestly, why not just shop around for similar hobbies or a different group? Or even just taking a break. I finally left, and while I haven't found a good replacement, at least it doesn't feel like picrel anymore.
No. 1541246
File: 1680688794278.jpg (36.81 KB, 750x648, 1644708912256.jpg)
I keep on watching how all of my hopes and dreams for the future that were so close to fruition are now shattering in slowmo, because of one retarded ass moid who is in charge of the country me and my closest people were born in, when we literally never voted for him. Like why the fuck would you want to have more land when the country is already the biggest in the world and is mostly a fucking shithole because you and your besties decided that your own people are trash, don't deserve to live good and you can steal all of the fucking money possible. What is the point of "protecting our country", when no one is fucking attacking us!! It's only you who is doing this shit to other people. Oh, these pesky Ukrainians that just decided to go their own way and not be your colony, why not just destroy them cos' we're soo stronkkk and best army in the world. SURE. Literal retards who should be in jail long time ago. Now you suck ass in Ukraine, you keep on borrow more and more time, when you already lived too long for a sack of shit like you. If you wanted NATO to stay away… You are the most embarassing failure of a person, since now you are the reason for NATO to exist. And of course, our main issue is these LGB, TQ, feminism, video games, anime, пендосы, opposition… children are watching all this and become nazi gays and commit suicide!! Of course our problem is not old ass moids and their asslickers trying to push for more restrictions and more escalation, right?
I hate this shit, I hate that now everyone blames people like me, who can't do shit to fix the situation. I was like a half year old when he became the president, of course it's now my fault that he's still a president. It's unbearble, there's no hope for the future, what's the fucking reason to continue pushing through? I've been depressed for a very long time, but I had hopes for the best, that good times will come and we will be able to live like normal people do and feel happiness. Nope. Fuck that. I keep on thinking about it and whining to everyone who can listen, but nothing is going to change. I don't know why I even decided to continue living. There's no point. Even if it ends like tomorrow, nothing will be the same for a very long time. Insane shit. Nonnies, when you'll respawn, never pick the мухосранск point, worst mistake of my life.
No. 1541297
File: 1680695892670.png (44.54 KB, 720x1520, Screenshot_20230405-045538.png)
Who else think Obamas dressed us in bad clothes on purpose and made us fat.
My home smells horrendous
I can't work in a compassionate sweatshop now.
They feed me too .uch durian
No. 1541299
File: 1680696485526.jpeg (52.83 KB, 560x589, e31308e7-02dc-4ced-9694-796e7a…)
I feel so drowsy since I didn't sleep well last night, but I'll just have to deal with it for rest of the day I guess. Because I just can't sleep right now, otherwise I'll wake up around the night-time and that'll mess up my routine more. I also can't manage to take a fucking nap, I either end up sleeping for a lot longer than I intended to (even with an alarm, I'm a heavy sleeper) or rather than helping me out with sleepiness, it feels even worse whenever I wake up from a nap. Fucking this shit. I wish sleeping wasn't necessary.
No. 1541308
File: 1680697121950.jpeg (79.44 KB, 1152x1441, FZ2vCeHUEAAchzh.jpeg)
>>1541300>His dick isn't nothing>Vagina superiorityI agree with the sentiment but take your meds anon.
No. 1541317
>>1541246I'm sorry
nonny, I'm from Finland and know plenty of Russian people who feel the same way and I'm extremely sympathetic towards you. You don't deserve such a piece of shit dictator oppressing you decade after decade and ruining your future. It's truly tragic and I wish I could give out easy answers but the only thing I or anyone else can hope for is that people like him won't live forever.
No. 1541321
File: 1680698042634.jpg (64.45 KB, 590x738, michelle-obama-inauguration-ou…)
>>1541297Idk, Michelle's outfit looked pretty good at Joe's inauguration.
No. 1541354
>>1541152What's wrong with 4 friends? I only have 2 and I think it would be difficult to keep up with many more.
I think people who have issues contacting others first are maybe just used to everyone else putting in the work to keep a relationship going. There are people who don't ever have to lift a finger to have a full social life.
No. 1541422
>>1541246My condelences anon, not that it helps much but plenty of foreigners understand your plight and realize you are all being horrifically abused by that sychophant.
Hopefully he will be dead soon, he looks very unwell in the media appearances.
No. 1541452
>>1541381I heard that, but I don't think this will actually happen. They are a bunch of clowns. Still, it's such an annoying pattern with them all. These politicians are always looking for something to restrict, as if this %some random shit of the week% is the only problem in the whole country and if it'll be outlawed, then russia will be a heaven on earth. It's already not safe to be a feminist sometimes, like one woman was put in prison for painting vulvas, meanwhile they barely give a shit about russian men's rights retards (only cared when they started show their nationalism, like bullying a woman with a black baby, but still not much has been done, ofc). I hate this trad shit, can't even be gay in peace, because PrOpAgANdA of ew ew ew ew non-traditional s*xual relations(how horrible).
>>1541317>>1541422Him dying is like one of the only hopes for now, though idk how much it'll help
>>1541400IKR, Russia is huge, has so many resources and so much shit needs to be done to improve the lives of people. But no, fuck making people's lives better, fuck being actually a good country, only legacy there is ussr's old ass dusty weapons and a scary reputation, so let's make an ass out of ourselves on a war and ruin everything for everyone, because it's so cool and epic.
>>1541341Yeah, at least your presidents don't have enough time to get bored to the point of randomly declaring a war, so there's that at least.
No. 1541484
File: 1680713951382.jpg (124.94 KB, 1080x782, IMG_20230405_185411.jpg)
I'm scared it's true. I always attract narcissists or creeps or losers or broke guys. I never sleep with those guys and I never seriously date them, but I'm around them and they hit on me and I know what they want from me. People often tell me I look vulnerable and I'm too quiet and shy and I don't have any friends, but am I really as bad as those men? I really don't feel worthy of anyone decent because nobody decent shows interest in me
No. 1541485
>>1541484Of course having exploitable traits doesn't make you as bad as exploiters.
I can guarantee that Francis is the type of worm who bitches about women needing to have more accountability because he himself belongs to a group of men who don't want to change their behaviors aka "be accountable" for the hurt they cause. He'd rather say "Well you deserved it." Because it would take guts and hard work to step up and be a better man for women. Classic
victim blaming behavior.
No. 1541519
File: 1680717819314.png (75.38 KB, 418x498, 1536152818819.png)
I had two "best girl friends" since high school, with the first one I genuinely loved talking about anime and nerdy stuff, we had very similar interests, but then she became a tumblr TRA and didn't like I disagreed with her so we split ways. The second friend was an older girl (late twenties, when I say older woman it sounds way out of my age group) but she was fine with talking shit about some things I liked while she was very sensitive about the things she liked, so after being quiet about it for months, I just went my own way.
I miss having a nerdy friend into anime with who I can talk about my favorite boys and plots that tug on the heartstrings, but going into fandom spaces nowadays they are full of politics and cancelling people over different takes (omg you ship A and B? C is his canon ship!!!!)
No. 1541520
File: 1680718005665.jpg (107.68 KB, 1440x1715, b80.jpg)
Please validate me that I'm not wrong here.
>cuddling with bf on bed
>bf getting into rough play with my dog whose fur is a black color, he is always nice to his own dog
>hear bf call my dog "little black nigger"
>please don't call my dog a nigger
>WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY ANON? I SAID 'NIGGA' NOT WITH AN R
>explain I heard him say with an R and that either way he really shouldn't be saying that
>WHY DO YOU WHITE WOMEN THINK YOU CAN SAY THAT WORD? I CAN GET (BLACK FRIEND) ON THE PHONE RIGHT NOW AND HE WILL TELL YOU I NEVER SAY THAT DON'T YOU EVER SAY THAT WORD AGAIN!
>explain that I was just repeating what I thought he had said and I didn't say it cause I thought it was cute, idiot
>I'M NOT GONNA LET YOU CALL ME AN IDIOT
>he walks out
Does my bf just hate me? I cannot imagine having this much contempt for someone I would love.
Btw he isn't black, he has some hispanic in him but he is totally white passing.
I don't like my bf, I think he is an asshole.
No. 1541544
>>1541529I think he realized he might have let an r slip in there but rather than admit it could have sounded that way, bury his shame by accusing me of being the bad guy.
What kills me is that he acts like there's a fucking audience who gives a damn in my own house.
The root issue is that I asked him to stop disrespecting my dog and he found a way to make me the disrespectful one of the situation.
>>1541538I'm not sure either but he insists there is a difference between "nigga" and "nigger." I once pointed out how some black people wouldn't appreciate him using either of those words and he told me then they must be ignorant. Like wtf? Do you care about their feelings or not?
Even the most touchy person would also realize there's a difference between saying something out of nowhere and repeating a phrase someone said to make a point.
Maybe he just didn't want to hear how "nigga" sounds pretty much the same thing to others? Who knows.
I just want to go to the dog park alone with the dogs, but I know he will accuse me of ignoring or abandoning him even though he is the one who left me to go play on his computer.
No. 1541554
File: 1680720200285.png (Spoiler Image,238.8 KB, 800x600, 0DF13F28-821B-4CE2-BC83-1A6655…)
A man I otherwise found decently attractive has gynecomastia. He’s skinny too. I didn’t think it was that bad at first but it’s worse than I originally thought. I feel like a psycho for being disappointed but that’s what I am. I have the ick. Picrel is a disgusting example
No. 1541556
>>1541544>but I know he will accuse me of ignoring or abandoning him even though he is the one who left me to go play on his computer.He didn't leave to cool off or because he doesn't want to be around you right now - he is ignoring you to punish you. He will get mad if you leave too because it means that his punishment isn't working. He wants you to pay more more attention and beg forgiveness. People like this can't be placated. It will never be enough. Please for your own safety and sanity get out of that relationship. I'm not the kind of
nonny who spams break up over every little thing, I barely post here, but these are telltale signs of an
abusive relationship.
No. 1541571
>>1541556Yep and that's exactly what he did to me.
I quietly moved past him as he sat on the couch watching his phone. I loaded the dogs into the car and that's when he started shit.
I told him he could go with us to the dog park, although earlier he bemoaned me for wanting to go on hikes and the dog park.
He was still stuck on me calling him an idiot and whined about how I would have left had he not confronted me.
Basically I told him yes and yes. I wasn't sorry he got called an idiot because he is acting like one, and yeah had he not said anything to me I was going to go alone because he was the one who left me alone. I was angry he called me a racist, but then he tried to play like he hadn't called me one and that I was self-telling. Lmao whatever, sure dude.
He got his dog from my car and threatened to leave me if I didn't resolve this. Oh well. I left anyway.
He called his momma. I'd be shocked if anything will happen considering how good he has it at my place. His mother will probably say whatever to placate him because she doesn't want her shitball son back at her place.
He actually ordered me designer sneakers because I did all the house chores by myself yesterday, and I'm sure as punishment he will rescind that too.
No. 1541578
>>1541484Being vulnerable doesn’t mean you deserve to be taken advantage of, but if you keep attracting shitty scrotes it
is a sign that you should work on your self-esteem more. Find things to like about yourself, find new hobbies/interests, and find new friends (preferably female ones bc male friends are rarely genuine or reliable). Men’s disgusting behavior isn’t your fault, but there are things you can do to make yourself less susceptible to it.
No. 1541608
I had a meltdown this morning because my mom was giving a lamp of mine to one of her friends without telling me or even asking. She does this a lot, as in she'll throw something out out or try to donate stuff because she assumes I don't want it. Sometimes it won't even occur to her that something's mine, even though we're the only two people in the house and she knows it's not hers. Crying over a lamp may seem dumb, but it was from my best friend in high school. We were like sisters, and after a really terrible situation our friendship became unstable until it eventually ended in a pretty messy way. I don't really talk much at all about the situation and have moved on with my life, but my mom knows how upsetting it was (I still can't even say her name).
I asked her why she wouldn't ask me before giving away my stuff to someone else, and she asked why I even cared seeing as I wasn't using it and "it wasn't special." I calmed myself down, and then asked for her full attention and explained that the lamp was important, as it was from my best friend (I haven't even said her name to my mom since 2021). My mom said she knew. I do not understand how she could know and still not think I might find it special? Her argument is that I wasn't using it. I got it in 2019, my room had a completely different layout with no space for it until late 2020. She stuck it in the basement, and I'm a little forgetful. I've had diagnosed ADHD my entire life, and she knows that out of sight = out of mind is very real for me and typically understands, she'll put things she knows are mine right where I'll see it, like if I leave a calculator out she'll put it next to my car keys. Sometimes she'll immediately put something away on autopilot which I completely understand. But still, it's not like I was completely unaware as to the existence of the lamp. If she had asked me last year or the year before I would've been wanted to take it out of storage.
All that aside, she acts as though I'm a hoarder when I'm not, because I hesitate to throw stuff away immediately. I'm very busy with classes and sometimes my room might be messy for a few weeks as well, or I might have random stuff scattered around the house (all things I use for classes btw). My mother is a clean freak, and I'm much the same, except for when we start cleaning stuff out. I still throw out a ton of stuff, but I'm meticulous and will make a bag of things that I'm unsure about, like if something could be fixed or if a friend might want it or if the item actually goes with another part. I'll steadily eliminate things from the temporary bag over the course of a week or two. She instead goes wild throwing everything into the trash or donations. I've had to go through donation bags before and take out items I know she wants/needs that just get caught up in her frenzy. When I was a kid and we were moving, the morning we left our old house she was going through the last small pile of things. She put the dog's food and water bowl frame in the trash bag and I had to wander over, take it out, and pack it in the car. Thankfully I had saved it, because at our first hotel she started getting stressed as she thought she had thrown it out. She does this regularly with things she either doesn't know the use of (technology stuff) or her own clothes because of her autopilot cleaning.
I know she hates clutter, and I know that due to my forgetfulness, there's times where I might leave something out for a week or two. It's just so frustrating to have her put away my things at random times, meaning that best case I'm stuck searching for them, or worst case, I forget about them. In the former scenario, she'll remember it's mine and ask me if I want it before she tries to get rid of it, and the latter scenario, she goes ahead and tries to get rid of it. There's not really a good option (especially as there's times where I have to leave something out in order to remember it for something a few days in the future). I try to bring all my stuff into my room asap, but there've been times where I drop something off, go out, and by the time I come back it's gone, only to reappear several days later when she gets it out of a cabinet and asks me "if I still want it." I do not appreciate being called a hoarder, she knows I have a bit of a complex about my own cleanliness as I'm very organized, have (mild, diagnosed) contamination OCD, and literally stress clean, while at the same time, I used to be very messy during middle/early high school (which I have a lot of shame about), and can let things pile up for a week or two before getting to properly tackling it. Our house isn't messy, my room is cleaner than a lot of people's, even when it's dirty. It literally all depends on if she just gets into an autopilot mood. I make significant effort to automatically clean the kitchen, and put my things in my room. Why can't she just ask before she stashes things away? She once lost a piece an expensive piece of tech my dad left over and need back because he had to return it, all because she packed it away. I got accused of losing it, because "I'm the one who is messy and loses stuff," even though it was entirely her fault for not asking someone about an item she's never seen before and knows isn't hers. That label is also frustrating because I don't lose things, she pretty much hides them. Jesus Christ I feel crazy for writing all this over a lamp
No. 1541645
>>1541583I’m generally pretty bored and understimulated so if you ever felt like sending a question or whatever with an estimated word count I could give it my best shot! Not until after Easter though. I’m joking, just half ass it. Actually it would be cool to try but I’m just being dumb.
>>1541585Maybe they just have a pleasant agreeable attitude and don’t find misogyny
problematic. If you reject a man at the first sign he’s a shit, you’ll either be single forever or land a good man. I’ve had few long term relationships but they’ve all been decent quality. But I’ve rejected 5x more usually before even an official first date. There’s no giving a man a second chance.
No. 1541651
>>1541520lmao wow
I give you my validation, you aren’t wrong
No. 1541655
>>1541608you're not crazy and your mom sounds somewhat rarted. it sucks with ADHD but sounds like you have to make it a priority to put everything important in your room because first and foremost you cannot trust her. it might seem a bit excessive but maybe literally labelling or putting stickers on your things with your initials, so she knows not to touch or to put them in your room would be helpful. is your house super cluttered, poorly organized, or is your mom just obsessed with decluttering? maybe you can try to do like weekly or biweekly declutters together.
if it's a lamp you weren't using and doesn't seem special, i get her being confused. if you don't greatly like or need the lamp, keeping it around just for the sake of a former friend giving it to you might be cumbersome, if you literally didn't even have the room for it until now. you have other ways of remembering the good times no like smaller mementos, no?
if you're messy and have adhd maybe you will benefit from the clutterbug youtube channel. you probably would benefit from reorganizing your stuff with open storage and more visible like the "butterfly" style. Also using big bins for storage (easy to put things away) or having designated places to put your stuff (like a tray) in every room so you can put your stuff there and pick it up later.
No. 1541666
>>1541608I know exactly what you're going through, my mother is the same. The worst part is that you don't have
security when it comes to your personal property. That is not only stressful but impacts your entire future life, growing up insecure like that.
It could have gone a few ways with me, I was concerned I would become a hoarder when I moved out to compensate. I did not, in fact I became the opposite, a total minimalist. I guess that was my defence from her throwing away everything I care about - just not caring about anything anymore.
It's not great, but it could have been worse. I love my mom to death, I really don't hold a grudge, I have now lived on my own for much longer than I lived with her.
No. 1541707
>>1541655Thank you nona, I probably should label some things. Our house is very clean and pretty organized, she just cleans on autopilot, I've literally had her vacuum something up during conversations. She's not a germaphobe or anything, she simply puts things away when it catches her eye.
I've had the space for the lamp for ~3 years. I think I said in my post that I kinda forget about things, especially if they've been tucked away completely out of sight for a while. I'll forget about things even when reminded if they're not immediately topical, like adding a lamp to my room. I actually could use the lamp, but I think you're getting at clinging on to stuff. It's definitely true that I shouldn't insist on holding on to stupid lamp (I do have other, more meaningful mementos), it's more the principle that she would give something of mine away without even asking me, especially knowing who I got it from. It's also frustrating in general, I've had things lost for weeks, and then finally come across them, and she'll be like "oh,
that's what you were looking for, yeah I put it there."
I'm very organized and quite clean, I just have a tendency to let things pile up over the week and then address them in one big go. It only takes me about an hour to get through putting away stuff, I actually do the very thing you mentioned in the last part. I have several bags, one for uni, one for a ballet studio where I work, and one for my folk dance costumes. The only reason things accumulate is that I need everything in them on different days throughout the week. The bin/bag/tray method works really well, I highly recommend to anyone who struggles with putting stuff away or forgetting items. I can pretty much grab what I need throughout the week and go
Sorry if I come off defensive, as I kinda said in the post, I was pretty messy when I was 13-15. It's been years since I was like that, but it still feels bad to be called messy, and I don't want people to think I'm some sort of slob. Again, I promise I'm tidy
No. 1541713
File: 1680736772565.jpg (56.95 KB, 500x665, cat.jpg)
Beyonce starts her tour in less than 40 days and I still haven't got tickets
No. 1541719
>>1541666>The worst part is that you don't have security when it comes to your personal propertyYes! Oh my gosh that's exactly it. Dare to leave something out and it's packed away at best, or given away/thrown out at worst.
Luckily, I've never been a hoarder. I do worry that I'm developing emotional problems around losing stuff temporarily. I'll get really distressed once I realize an item isn't where I thought it was, I
have to find it immediately and put it away before I can do anything. Especially if I just saw it, I start panicking because of my own complex and the very real fear that my mom got to it and it's now at the bottom of a goodwill bag. I've been late to things and have had times where I'm unable to sleep because I'm so desperate to find something.
Thank you for your words, I really love my mom too and in a way I'm grateful because I've learned well about maintaining my living spaces and letting go of items (just not the lamp though), especially compared to a lot of young people. I was still pretty upset when I vented earlier, it's pretty rare for something special to get caught up. 90% of the time the only items that fall
victim are new purchases or transient items that go with me on different days (rip to all my sunscreens she didn't think I was using).
No. 1541754
>>1541608I got flashbacks reading this of my mom selling my GameCube at a yard sale. She "convinced" me to at first sell it for $40, then I remember being half asleep and her asking me if we can sell it for $10 and I said "Fine, whatever." I remember the days after that realizing how I got rid of something I used almost daily and my mom tried to make it a game of us being "so fucking poor" it got put onto me. My current life is still affected by my mom and dad crying about how poor we were, despite us not really, they were just financially irresponsible, and how I currently struggle to spend even just a little on myself without freaking out about saving.
I'm just ranting at this point now, but Jesus Christ I'm so glad I'm so much more financially responsible and making more than my parents could in a short amount of time. Still struggling, but I have a bit of a safety net now.
No. 1541758
>>1541755Same situation here too, I feel you anon
It's my graduating semester and I'm just so ready to be done. We're at the home stretch so let's push hard and do our best.
No. 1541760
File: 1680743608652.jpg (68.58 KB, 676x900, FdiD7SyXEAAsoCE.jpg)
after this fucking dumb shit sickness is practically gone I finally get it and it basically deleted my sense of taste. fuck covid honestly
No. 1541772
I have no sense of belonging, this used to be my only comfort place but now it's just an echo chamber and so is the regular internet and everyone around me. There is no counterculture left, no nothing. I want to move to a forest and talk to the fucking birds. I'm done being nice, I'm done being the bigger person, I'm done with everyone and everything. I should have killed myself years ago, would have saved me trouble. I would feel guilty now, I wish I went through with it back then.
>>1541769Hope you feel better soon nona
No. 1541782
File: 1680746034722.jpeg (47.24 KB, 750x750, ED9A385D-0E9E-4E11-906C-243A1E…)
>>1541779Thank you for sharing, that helps too. I really appreciate all the replies; I really fucking love this place and how it can be a place of support and shared experiences
No. 1541784
File: 1680746646870.jpg (12.81 KB, 318x307, FrtBQSNWcAEa-JP.jpg)
Getting my pre-permit + exam permit tomorrow afternoon, in a walk through video it says bring in a signed form. Said form is nowhere to be found, not linked on the step-by-step page, just 5 seconds of the video. Stupid MVC if you fuck this up for me because I don't have an unattainable paper it just proves how incompetent you are with technology.
No. 1541807
File: 1680749659830.jpg (29.86 KB, 474x454, th-3660842090.jpg)
Went to see the Mario movie with my aunt and my cousing, the movie was fun and my husbando Bowser was adorable. However, the experience was ruined when my aunt started bitching about me having 0 contact with my abusive brother. The thing is, I don't talk to him because he's a moody unpredictable asshole that has made my life hell. He yells and punches walls and acts insane. But my aunt insists on me talking to him because I need to experience what a family is, whatever that entails. I'm tired and I just don't want to keep living near my family anymore
No. 1541830
>>1541807I hate your aunt used an outing to tip toe past your boundaries this way. Tell her straight up that your brother is no longer a subject to discuss anymore.
Personal experience, except with a mother not a brother: the stronger a boundary the more upset it makes others who lack the ability to set boundaries in their own lives. Protect you, your mental energy, and your happiness. Proud of you nonna. Im proud of you regardless what family may say.
No. 1541839
>>1537536I hate to use this word but this girl I know is the biggest attention seeker I know. This will be a long rant but I'm really done with her.
- She started dating this girl and now everything has to be about them and their love. Everytime something goes wrong she asks me for advice which results in me giving her and/or her girlfriend free therapy for an hour, but when I went to ask her advice about feeling lost in college she only told me to drop out and said it's ok to quit.
- We lived together for a year until I had to kick her out for repeatedly cutting and also attempting suicide resulting in me having to take her to ER every other week.
Now for some petty grating shit:
- Sitting next to her, quickly look at her phone she is listening to anime rap (it was a rap on Sasuke's POV).
- Points and laughs at me, basically. Yelling "WHAT'S THAT ON YOUR EYES? IS IT CRUST?" more than once (we have classes at 6am and I yawn a lot). Pointed at my jeans and made everyone notice there was a stain on them, saying "I really like the pattern on Anon's pants today".
- Keeps yelling irrelevant shit in class to get attention. We had kidney failure class today and she kept yelling "COKE IS MY WATER! IF I DRINK WATER IT WILL POISON ME!" in an attempt to get the professor's attention, who stayed quiet for a few seconds and completely ignored her.
- Trying to study and she kept poking the back of my neck. When I looked back she and her girlfriend would point at each other and giggle. Repeat 2-3 times.
- Finally, today I decided to start ignoring her and she spent the whole class poking my arm and slowly putting her finger on the off button on my laptop pretending like she was going to turn it off. I didn't look at her once even during this stuff, and she kept doing it.
I fucking hate this bitch.
No. 1541865
File: 1680759531450.png (497.99 KB, 1710x900, madeinanus.png)
What's at the bottom of the abyss? The fact that you spent hours of your life watching kiddy torture porn written by a pedophile. It only seems good because he's set the ultimate bait - the literal unknown. People are so starved for decent media that a narrative with an eldritchian mystery and decent pacing is seen as a masterpiece of storytelling. The reality is that everything that happens is merely a setup to enact the author's various violent fetishes upon a cast of terminally innocent and unbreakable children. They never learn. They never grow. They never mature. They traipse about haphazardly into one abuse after the next. Occasionally a narrator reminds us that the abyss is a spooooky place, as if we forgot inbetween the gargled screams of anything remotely cute and childlike. Once the facade slips it becomes remarkably predictable and stale - despite the otherworldly setting. I'm somewhat ashamed to admit it became a comedy of sorts, predicting which sick fetish would next beset our poor protagonists. Nothing could even surprise me after a point. I started to wish he'd turn them into sentient soup again, that was at least interesting. And it's here that I realized that I had become the meme. I had gazed too long, and Akihito Tsukushi had gazed into me. 4/10 the background art and ost were alright I guess.
No. 1541881
File: 1680764325519.jpeg (52.56 KB, 750x713, C32263F7-E021-4B66-A9B9-2EFBF7…)
I have so many incredibly sexy ideas for off the wall lesbian erotica comics that I wish I could bring into the world, but my art style is not sexy at all. I know the only way to get it there is practice but I cringe so hard when I try to draw something sexy and it doesn’t give off sexy vibes that I wanna jump out a window and burn my sketchbook to hide the evidence. TFW you’ll never be able to create the female suit-wearing classic spy drama erotica you know the world needs.
No. 1541889
File: 1680766417313.gif (64.14 KB, 180x129, 1658860074688.gif)
>buy cute silk dress off ebay
>seller says they're out of town and won't be able to ship until april 1
>okay
>ff to april 4, dress still hasn't shipped
>open up case on ebay because i'm paranoid and want the seller to acknowledge and be held accountable in case my moneyback guarantee window expires
>seller whines that they already told me they'd be away and now they "can't do a refund" because i opened a case
>pretty sure they still can or just give me a tracking number instead
>look over the seller's sales ratings and they're all positive
>okay…
>decide to close it because there's no way the seller can ship it within ebay's 3 day window (said she can't ship until another week)
>…
>order now says it cancelled (but still says it's paid, no refund, but has a delivery progress bar like it could be shipped still?)
>pretty sure the seller is peeved at me because i created this headache while she's probably on her beach vacay at the bahamas or something
>am no longer covered under Ebays money back guarantee because you can only open a case once
God fucking damnit. In hindsight, I should've waited a bit longer since I still had about two weeks left to open up a case but I didn't know until I fully read the policy guidelines after the fact. Fucking hate retail headaches, especially since I brought the situation on myself instead of being more patient and messaging the seller before jumping to opening up a case. I guess I'll keep this in mind next time but I just hoping I can still get the dress and not be totally fucked over.
No. 1541900
>>1541896>I’ve mentioned to him I think I might be fatally ill and his response didn’t seem very concerned… which I expect. >I know mentioning I have very limited time left still won’t convince him to move his ass into gear to spend these next precious moments with me.he is an awful, irredeemable person who doesn't give a single shit about you and you need to delete his contact info off everything and never talk to him again. Most normal people wouldn't even act that cold to a fucking stranger who reveals they're terminally ill and you're supposed to be his girlfriend?
>My life was wasted on someone who didn’t care and I’ve been the fool.You can't blame yourself for expecting basic human decency. you are not alone, many women stay with shit men because they project their humanity onto him, expecting and believing he has something inside his heart. It often takes a big event like this to reveal the illusion. Don't waste another second on him and do something nice for yourself.
No. 1541901
File: 1680768828141.jpeg (55.9 KB, 385x700, A8778465-E49F-4187-92D9-FE012F…)
>seeing comments from obvious teens on 14 year old videos I use to watch when I was a teen
>teens being jealous and wished they grew up during the early 2000s and actively trying to replicate the vibe .
This shit makes me feel so damn old. I will say those times weren’t super great and had their issues but I will always be thankful I got to experience and see the internet before it became the hell hole it is now. I also doubt these teens would last a day on internet during that time kek
No. 1541905
File: 1680769956437.jpg (135.33 KB, 736x1084, ea731c34bfc883f992907f158505f7…)
>>1541901> I also doubt these teens would last a day on internet during that time kekAs a filthy zoomer i can attest to this. It's so funny because the zoomies feeling second hand nostalgia for the 00's are the same ones with pronouns and ''antis/transphobes/etc DNI'' in bio, aka the same people that ruined the internet. It makes me sad that we got robbed out of a teenagehood we can feel nostalgia for, the 10's in my mind feel so plastic and boring.
No. 1541921
File: 1680771588784.jpg (78.08 KB, 480x674, f8c1d49cc830def3188a2a1040ffff…)
>>1541914>Yeah and alot of their interests, their fashion, is just superficial.i am glad i am not the only one who feels like this. The only zoomer fashion is ''e-girl'' which is just a porned out version of emo/mall-goth, that's attached to the ''porn culture(gross)'', there is no music/media/culture to it, it's just porn. It's sad because from what i heard emo/goth/punk used to be ''weird ugly chick fashion'' and now these pickmes and coomers turned it into another porntag. We literally cant have anything without it being turned into porn for male consumption.
No. 1541923
>>1541914There use to be more focus on being an individual back in the day now everyone's told how they have to behave in certain groups. Trannyism has put equality back because now humans can't be complex, because behaviours are actually gendered and if a person is more inclined to certain gendered things they should probably transition but also remember gender is a social construct? Pure retardation online these days.
I grew up on messageboards and they attracted users from all over the globe. The Internet was never quiet you were more aware of time zones. Euro fags would sleep and Americans would post then there'd be the crossover where both would be active. I miss messageboards, lose of my pals migrated to subreddits and I fucking hate the culture on reddit with the post scoring. There's no more unfiltered discussion cause of reputation
No. 1541941
>>1541932I remember that too but also things haven't changed a lot since. Even people defending 'sex workers' and
victims secretly think they're braindead thots and wouldn't actually treat them like people. If anything, since the whole uwu egirl thing began I've started seeing young women in their late teens and early 20s crying over getting old, taking their insecurities out on older women ('the wall' rhetoric that somehow made its way into their heads), and trying to look like fuckable children.
Bodyshaming was rife in the 2000s, but I've never had the popular body type and have made peace with the fact that I'll always be a fatty bombatty, but this new wave of face-shaming (idk what else to call it) is scarier imo.
No. 1541945
>>1541937Of course kids are still being groomed and abused, that will never go away. But these days it's not socially accepted at all for an adult male to have sexual relations with a literal pre-teen or even make jokes about it like it was back in those days, now you would be rightfully seen as a creep for hanging around teenagers.
>>1541941Imageboards aside, you absolutely would be called out in the mainstream for being stuck in the body shaming 00's mean girl mindset. People here have tunnel vision from spending too much time on gossip forums without realizing how the majority of online normies think and behave.
No. 1541967
>>1541246nonna,while I understand your frustration I don't think you fully grasp how politics work
I'm tired talking about this topic and this fucking war and as someone from a NATO country that shares borders with Ukraine I hate it with all my guts, but you have to understand that this didn't happen overnight, all the years USA instigated Russia has lead to this ( Zelensky is a puppet leader btw, Crimea was a huge red flag of the conflict to follow, USA building labs and facilities in Ukraine etc). Russia simply wanted USA to fuck off, they didn't, and now the whole west is caught up in this proxy war between USA and Russia. If Zelensky truly cared for his people he would be open to negotiations, but he isn't , and with every passing day this war costs both sides thousands of lives lost, costs the EU billions of euros funneled into ulraine, in the end, for what? to prolong a senseless war.
I have interacted with ukrainian refugees and while all of them despise Putin , a lot of them hate their president as well for condemning them.
No. 1541977
File: 1680780774724.jpg (505.49 KB, 2400x1808, dw.jpg)
My work friend and the only other woman under 30 in my office just handed in her notice and it leaving in a month to go backpacking through Europe with her husband. I'm gonna miss her so much, and when she's gone all that'll be left are me, a bunch of moids and wine moms who only bring up their kids to say how much they hate them.
No. 1541993
>>1537536crossposting from the shay board but i am trying to quit smoking high thc amounts (dabs/concentrates) and i am in a hell of my own making right now. ive been able to go 15-17 hours without smoking at the longest but then i start puking bile and having diarrhea and shaking. copy and pasting cuz sick and lazy: im this anon and im back cuz im in shaynus hell. having diarrhea, i puked bile this morning, and i feel awful. this must be what shayna feels like every day. ive actually smoked myself into a shayblivion. i even took dabs 4-5 times yesterday and still felt sick until late in the evening (last time i smoked was 3 pm and i did the same thing the night before. this morning i have sadly dabbed twice because i couldn't handle the pain and agony i was feeling in my body. i am running low tho so i think i will be able to successfully wean myself down to a point where i can stop and it wont be so bad. but i know smoking is prolonging my pain. i may have CHS and im definitely experiencing cannabis withdrawal syndrome. any nonnas have any any tips for me in this time to help numb the physical pain? should i repost this in /ot/ is there a good thread for this?
TLDR: need help with chs/cannabis withdrawal symptoms any nonnies been thru this?
No. 1541998
I just want to remind everyone that the most important thing is to be in good health.
I went out to pick up a package and I saw 1 child bound to a wheelchair , 1 adult with some kind of handicap, bound to a wheelchair and one adult with growth deficiency ( it seemed like a 7 year old, but when he turned he had the face of an adult) .
Acne, hair loss, weight and all these are other problems are superficial issues compared to what some people deal with. Hell, even if you're ugly, at least you can walk, you have both legs, hands, can think, can talk etc
be grateful for every little thing, you really don't know how lucky you are
No. 1542080
>>1542052If pseudoephedrine is legal where you live go get some. If ephedrine is legal even BETTER get some of that. Don’t bother if the only thing legal where you live is phenylephrine - it’s been proven to be entirely ineffective at doing anything at all when taken by mouth, it literally has to be given via IV for it to do anything.
And regardless of whether you can get pseudo/ephedrine or not, what the other nonna who replied to you said still applies! Cause she gave you good advice (idk about the banana thing tho, I’d have to look into that personally but everything else is solid)
No. 1542096
File: 1680790046028.jpg (52.4 KB, 738x738, 00f9ea007dcd6fb7c7d25e6b164a08…)
i used to be a hardcore shipper until a few years ago and i always defended fujos because god forbid women do anything but GOD fujos are annoying. it's come to the point that i see anything ship related and find it cringe. even worse when you try and browse normal threads in m and suddenly fujos are smearing their disgusting rape kink all over the thread.
No. 1542191
>>1542178people are very fake and unconditional love is super duper rare. Almost every relationship is transactional.
You being so vulnerable and having to grow and mature so fast through life's difficulties made you hard to "digest" and people could not tolerate that. Of course this can
trigger other's difficulties, but people will very often drop you if you're not within easy reach/easy to them.
It also seems like people don't realize that if you've had faced rejection from other from a young age, of course you're going to have behavioral quirks or things that may seem "off".
I'm not trying to make you more desperate btw, I've just had it with how fake people are and I resonated in my own way with what you said.
>>1542189It feels like if you're not performing your gender, the more you're seen as mature-looking and it may put off others.
They really do expect us to dress and act like we're 15 until we hit like 28 and then we've expired and are spoiled goods and we should immediately switch to granny attire lol
I understand that this post was made because you feel ugly, but from my experience, people tend to behave this way to women who are not gender performing as they should. They will immediately bring you down if you're not a caricature for the male gaze. I wish you had better self view, but I'm glad you're you.
Sorry if I sound pretentious or ignorant, I sincerely mean it.
(Redditor) No. 1542211
>>1542191Thanks. That's actually very empathetic. It genuinely gave me a sense of reassurance to have someone actually understand my situation instead of some fake "it will get better" or "I'm so sorry". Those types of answers or reactions annoy me simply because they are entirely useless and when I tell those people to fuck off. They act like I'm evil and unempathetic. Simply, that kind of advice does not work and it is self centered on the part of the person that is saying it.
Your reply is actually very understanding and empathic. I think most people do not understand what empathy is. It isn't telling someone "I'm sorry" "It will get better". It's much more than that.
No. 1542220
File: 1680799450738.jpg (57.2 KB, 880x480, IT-clown-.jpg)
I went through a lot of hassle to buy my crush a present, I went to a another town before work, then I missed a bus which wasn't my fault and had to take another one or otherwise I would be late to work but it stopped in a totally different part of my hometown and I had to walk for like 40 minutes to get to my house, and then take my stuff and go to work. Kek I finally gave it to him and he said thanks but like I didn't see any emotion on his face and then he said he's tired after work and he can't think straigh and that he will message me later or something and he walked away. I felt brushed off. Now I regret giving it to him, we're not even a couple and it's not his birthday or anything, I just wanted to do something nice for him but it really seemed like he didn't even want to talk to me, even though before it felt like he was really into me. Well I feel like shit now
No. 1542244
>>1542220it's nice what you did but if he doesn't like you at least a teeny tiny bit….this comes off as weird
I hope he gives you at least a proper thank you
No. 1542299
File: 1680806647029.png (3.73 KB, 151x149, ppod.png)
>>1542278obituaries are written by the family so it is anything goes. some say, some don't, some leave obvious hints like "in lieu of flowers, please donate to this suicide/rehab/awareness organization"
No. 1542350
>>1541967AYRT and I'm a bit late, but, sure, maybe I don't understand the politics. But what negotiations are there to discuss with this bunch of retards that are ruling Russia rn? Give away the whole ukraine like some of especially loud ones want? Honestly, Ukraine should just have all of their borders the same as pre-2014 and just have their own leaders that they'll choose themselves and idk if Zelensky is a puppet leader or not, but before him there were russian puppets leaders, which is not that much better. I only heard about bio labs from russian propaganda shows, so i really don't trust any of that since they only speak in a language of lies. I really don't want any negotiations with these people, i want putin, united russia, duma and the whole current regime gone. Hate to use this word, but they are faschist as fuck, bunch of old people, their nepobabies and asslickers who decide what other right to take away from people, what else to steal to buy themselves a new huge ass house in some eu country while pensioners get less than 10k rubles a month since "oh, there is some cheap pasta, that enough". I hate that to divert attention from actual shit happening in the country, they focus their hate on lgb people. Hate that they take children away from people who are not agreeing with the regime. I hate that people can't say anything or even fucking like a comment with an opinion that is differing from the "correct" by government's standarts. I don't like USA much but what USA instigates there that makes taking a piece of another country (Crimea) and, later, invading and trying to take more land okay? Especially when living in your own country sucks and has lots of shit that needs to be worked on. Russia is not just wants USA to fuck off. They want to be this another important country in the world, just like USA or China, since putin has some small dick complex and being irrelevant like that is not enough. But they can't do it any other way, they don't gave enough shit to produce something important without stealing shit, they can't help other countries to be noticed, they just can't do fucking nothing else to actually mean something, but they miss USSR times when everybody was oh so afraid of us. So the only fucking thing they can do is scare other countries, scare their own people, threaten everybody just so other countries would fucking give a shit and give them attention just like they think they deserve. Because being just a big country is not enough anymore, now the quality of living is a priority, which they just don't want to work on. Sorry, went on a whole another unhinged tirade here. But i really don't see any point to agree to any of their demands and let them continue acting this way, they won't be satisfied with anything, not after a whole year of this war. And it will only give them more power to do this shit again if someone doesn't do what they want.
No. 1542353
>>1540991sure nonna,I'll list some of my interactions with these guys, note that I've never slept with any of them (which made them very sour kek)
the age of everyone was 26-29ish, I haven't greentext storytime'd in a while so excuse my retarded way of telling things
case #1
>liked me as soon as I joined the company>shy introvert, asshole (as I would later find out)>mutual friend hooked us up, sort of>go on a few dates, we actually have quite some stuff in common, especially niche hobbies and shit>side note:I was depressive at the time and I'm not really the type of woman to chase men>dude actually wants me to cut my nails and not wear short skirts>wot.jpg , lolno>he stops talking to me all of a sudden and acts like a salty bitch>I don't know wtf is going on and I panic a bit and get saddened by this>break down and cry when he accepts to talk to me at one point>he labels me emotionally unstable>doesn't want to admit his judgement is wrong>later hooks up with the most hypocrite girl in the team and throws me some arrogant stares as if he's some kind of alpha when in reality he has a smol dick ( I know because he told me this and grabbed my hand and put it there. ew)>I,being emotional back then,cry again at one point>nonna gets her shit together later>realized she dodged on hell of a bullet>common friend later tells me how the faggot bragged that he thought I might kill myself (lmao) bcz of his rejection and that he could've pumped and dumped me>mega lol,as if he could, he was virgin (not saying it as a mean thing, but he had some retarded expectations and his sex brag was retarded)>he also says he likes one type of girl and hooks up with the COMPLETE OPPOSITE, the most vanilla boring manipulative bitch you can imagine>to this day laugh every single time i remember or when i see him and his gf on the streetlesson learned, bullet dodged
case #2
>after #1>meets me during some event and likes me>I know he likes me>opposite of #1 : extrovert, large social group etc>drags me in his group to various activities>I have 0 feelings but since I'm an introvert and I was adopted by an extrovert I figure I might as well play along>things are fun for a while>red flags start showing during the nights out with his other guy friends and how they treat him like the leader of the pack>everything he says is law>at one point accuses me of doing something I didn't>other guys don't say a word although they saw everything and what he said LITERALLY did not happen>he tells me to "get up and leave the table">lol wtf,I take my purse and leave, go home and enjoy my videogames and animu>the rage dies down and I am invited back into the group again>I'm just gonna fast forward here because a lot of shit happens, but I basically made it clear before that I am not interested romantically in him, everything culminates when all of a sudden I am not being invited to the gatherings and nights out anymore, when if some of the girls in the group (there were 2) ask about me, it's crickets>later find out from a former girl in the group and love interest of said alpha male that this happened to her too, she was kicked out when she wasn't of interest/didn't give in to their advances>nonna ends up realizing all those wasted nights out could have been spent doing things I actually liked>lessons learned: playing an extrovert when you're an introvert is so fucking tiring, I've since learned to say a big fat NO and do the shit I likeIn both cases I acted very nice, shy and sometimes sad (because of depression). Apparently you ARE NOT ALLOWED to be sad because then you are eMmOtiOnaLlY uNsTaBlE and something is definitely wrong with you!
Case #3 , during case #2
>friend of the alpha male>likes me but is afraid to tell me because alpha male has his eyes on me>dude is actually attractive and nice, shame he lets that alpha wannabe faggot walk all over him>I'm nice to him, he gives me hugs sometimes , I hug back> this displeases the alpha (kek)>he always pics on this guy and makes fun of him for liking me in their meetings ( I find out via someone else)>even if he still liked me after I was kicked out he was afraid and did not talk to me because of alpha faggotCase #4 is a copy-paste of #3, except I actually liked the guy but he always chose the alpha faggot and the group instead of me
If you're a woman in engineering and you're somewhat good looking you are fucked
>talk to guys>you're a slut>don't talk to guys>you're a bitchmy best guy friend said the same thing when I told him these stories, there was no win for me in these situations
There are some other cases too, those are the most notable tho
I was just being nice because this is how I was, I have since then learned that it's good to be a bitch sometimes and to say NO.
On the positive side, there were some really good and level-headed male engineers I interacted with, but all of them were married
then the pandemic came, I kinda miss the work shenanigans and retarded drama but everyone is prolly married by now except me lol
I hope this entertained you at least a bit, I surely was amused when remembering this.