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Please keep posts focused on women and female homosexuality! If you want to talk about attraction toward males it probably belongs in the bisexuality thread or questioning thread (check the catalog, they're usually not on the front page but I promise they exist!). Please ignore obvious bihet/troon/tradthot/etc rage bait as well. Running low on vintage pics so I hope retro is fine!
Topics of discussion may include but are not limited to:>first crush?>what’s your local lesbian scene like?>cute stories about your gf>favourite lesbian media? lesbian media you hate?>coming out stories>are there any cows you’d uhaul with?>bitch about being lonely>tips for coping with being lonely>butch? femme? how do you feel about labels?>top? bottom? how do you feel about those labels?>what's your type?>when did you know you were gay?>which lesbian stereotypes do you fit? which ones don’t fit you at all?>what were you like as a kid? tomboy? girly girl who made her Barbies kiss?>what do you wanna be like as an old lady lesbian? >get mushy and describe your dream relationship/date/etc>best date/match? worst?>how homophobic are your family/friends? is it woke homophobia or oldschool homophobia?>dating app horror stories>f/f fanfic recs (pls)>everything we hate about every other online lesbian community
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Twitter would consider her full butch for wearing pants and no drag makeup. I've seen picrel described as 'butch vibes'
I don't think that online lesbian spaces were much more better in the past, maybe less overrun by trains but imo there never was a high quality stuff. Basically don't beat yourself up too hard for not being involved earlier.>>247573
if these women are going to embarrass themselves by simping for a man, they could have at least choose someone who is not offensive to look at.
She has a nice voice but I'm not sure if it's just the studio quality reverb or her voice anymore. It's clear 90% of TikTokers only like her bcuz stanning POC
because they're POC
= good uwu and as an Asian this genuinely gives me the creeps.>>247573
Why do these people claim that Hozier's music is perfect for lesbians like…he's a man kek.
I'm so bitter about the "women in suits" trend because I've always worn a suit to all occasions since I was 15 and been considered a freak for it, now you got all these kinsey 1 women having girlcrushes on top supermodels wearing pantsuits and calling it being a lesbian. >>247524
Soon I hope nonna>>247579
Don't think so, we just moved to "two femmes or two they/thems" instead and killed butches off completely.
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The pillow princess discourse drives me nuts. Like obviously women are entitled to their boundaries and nobody should be forced but literally everyone except stone tops wants a partner that reciprocates and that’s not predatory or entitled. Even the mildest criticism of it gets you branded a predatory lesbian who wants to literally assault them. If a het male refuses to reciprocate because pussy is icky we’re allowed to call it dumb and make jokes about it.
My ex was like that, and it genuinely traumatized me. I made her cum like seven times, and when I asked if I could get something too, she just looked fucking disgusted. I started crying, she called me overdramatic and a rapist. This is just one example but it happened so many times. Ironically she was the ""butch"" in the relationship, you would think it was the other way around.
I know it's stupid but it kind of made me give up on women ever finding me attractive.
Fat men being lazy in bed too, shocking? No. Not really.>>247733
It's not about you being attractive or not, your gf was just selfish and even mentally ill. Calling you a rapist whenever you disagree or want some attention is such a low blow and quite retarded since women can't really be rapists, no I don't care whatever anyone thinks it's just almost impossible. I hope you find someone that values you and cares about your pleasure
Also are you a man or a newfag who discovered this site from reddit? Your writing style in both >>247737
really stick out and it's easy to tell you from other anons because you don't interrogate. I thought you were the original anon at first and tried the assure you you it isn't rape to ask your gf for something you want to try in bed but your talking points make you sound like a pickme or a mra crying women rape too who has no place posting in a lesbian thread.
Yeah I know logically it's not me not being attractive (I know my ex was not some "sex bomb" on societys standards but I found her hot anyway).
I just feel like it's impossible to find a woman who likes my body as much as I like hers. I don't know if it's fetisization but I am constantly telling a gf how pretty and lovely and beautiful aaah she is because I genuinely think so, and always handsy with her body because I like female body so much…. Basically with women I'm like a teenage hormonal moid, idk what the hell is wrong with me. I have just never met a woman who likes me the way I do her, I feel like a freak. I even tried drinking spearmint tea to tone my libido down last time since it's so annoying.
Spoiler moid mention; And I did basically give up, and I know it's haram (please do not strangle me) I did find someone who is excited by my body the way I am about women, a fucking moid. But now I do not feel anything like I did with women, I do not feel anything at all. That's why I am puzzled if my attraction to women is just a learned thing from scrotes, some fetishy stuff from porn. I do not know if it's normal to be so obsessed with women.
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>>247754>men have higher standards
And obviously not looking for advise with muh naigell! Just do lesbians feel they are the embodiment of picrel too
Maybe I'm a man on the inside, time to go on T uguu
In my experience a lot of lesbians have had a lesbian relationship that traumatized them, more often than not it's being a servant to an unstable pillow princess who mentally abuses them and makes them feel like rapist for having normal sexual needs and desires. I seriously don't know why this is but so many that I've met have issues with their sexuality or fucked off to a miserable dead bedroom relationship with a moid simply because they feel too predatory for finding women attractive.
Whichever the case, it's not your fault and wanting sex with your partner you find attractive is completely acceptable. I wish
I had a partner with a high libido, it feels like finding lesbians or febfems who aren't shamed into borderline asexuality is impossible.
Not trying to start any fights but I posted it specifically here to get opinions from the pussy fandom. Ok now that I wrote it out I do sound like a troon trying to force my way into a women's locker room.
I just saw "pillow princess" in the first page of /ot/ and got TrIgGeRed
and just HAD to post my sob story, I'm sorry, I should not have.
That's textbook racebaiting nonnie
First of all I'm pretty sure nobody forced her to put on that shirt and that's simply her identifying as a femme, maybe she dresses in OTT frilly dresses outside of this photo to pass as femme by zoomer lesbian standards, we don't know. Secondly, does she even have lighter skin? Looks the same to me as the girls in the front, only she's wearing a white shirt and standing in the sun while the others are wearing black and have more shadows on their faces. It's a black and white photo so it's impossible to tell.>>247846
It's such a retarded thing to get so worked up over anyway because like you said we know nothing about the context of this photo and I think it's in extremely poor taste to bring racebait brainrot in the lesbian thread of all places. There's a reason why it's a banned topic on Lolcow, it always ends up in infighting and uncontrolled spergery. Like someone thinking you can't be a femme if you're wearing a sleeveless shirt and jeans in one photo unless racism.
I don't know any other lesbians but this has been my experience to a T with my exes. Bi but prefers men, none of them interested in reciprocating, all of them abusive
and making me feel like a predatory freak for wanting them sexually, and the relationships ending and I feel like I'm gross and unloveable as I watch them go on to date men. I have never been with a woman who desired me as I desired her. I hope one day I'll find another butch who can love me the same way I would love her. Where do we even find each other nowadays? It's all bisexuals and trannies.
if you look closer, the femme is obviously wearing makeup and her hair is considerably more stylized compared to the self proclaimed butch women in the pic
To be fair,I get the confusion - the butch on the right doesn't show any particular masculine qualities at all - maybe she was a baby butch just starting out?
>motorboat her boobas
Best thing I've heard today, same nonna>>247962
Yep and basically any woman who talks about woman empowerment or advocates even the slightest towards having women in a strong position within society is now a "lesbian/wuhluhwuh icon uwu"
Aw it's okay nonna. May you get that perfect chance one day. >>248041
Same with "non-binary lesbians". I don't get it. I thought the definition of lesbian was a "homosexual woman".
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I really need to go into dating since I'm in early college. All the lesbian girls are either ocd-autistic which I hate or giga normies. I get along well with east asian student since I like to teach them my language, but you can never know things about their love life. I was thinking about finding a girlfriend trought hobbies/fandoms but I know I will only find genderspecial or ultra autistic ones like in the past. Please nonnas help
RIP sorry but that's basically all there is nowadays. Why don't you just go for normies? They're easier to deal with.
Also as a fellow autismo I'd like to know where you find non tranny autismo lesbians bc I've never met one who didn't eventually turn into a he/they.
thank u anon for that hard fact. I never go for the normies since most of them are boring or non passionate about any subject or worst lazy rich meanies (fashion school in a nutshell).
Yeah I was surprised too by the autistic cis lesbian but they are quite normie-ish and into feminist politics and common lgbt stuff.
honestly I would like either a funny normie girl or a girl who as clear interest and are not OCD about everything ( I'm a fellow autist too but like I learn not to flip my shit it someone take a little too much space when we are working on bulky stuff ).
Funny thing, this evening I crossed a probably korean girl from my school near it and she kept making eye contact while her friend where talking. Idk if it was because I was carrying a fabric roll but it was so strange.
To piggyback I feel like I've been meme'd into only noticing girls into alt styles or have colorful short haircuts bc my mind instantly thinks 'Oh she could
be "qweer"' even if that just means they are bihet with bfs. Also I think a lot of time these girls are too young for me (like still in highshool). I don't take notice to most normie looking girls because I always assume she's probably straight. Honestly a shame I feel like I'm missing out on some hidden gems.
She 100% sounded like an incel though>straight
She literally admitted she sounded like an incel but sure
i'm about to graduate and in the same boat as you lol i'm so sorry. i'm too weird to get along with normies but too normie to get along with the genderspecials>>248798
honestly i think i'm finally going to suck it up and adopt an alt look for this exact reason. most of my interests match anyway so it wouldn't really be larping. i think i'm coming across as like a horse girl or something right now>>249027
i've hated it since its inception. kinda seems like it's going out of style though
Go back to Twitter or Reddit.>>249027
Not just you. Even when it wasn't a TikTok, Tumblr or Twitter thing it always irked me the wrong way. What's so wrong about saying lesbian or attraction to women that they had to come up with this? >>249045>too weird to get along with normies but too normie to get along with the genderspecials
Ah, same here nonna, sorry about that. One day, hopefully.
Can us nonnas just date each other tbh? >>249088
Holey shit that is the best description of the term ngl. So that's why I never liked being called a wlw…
I believe I experienced "comphet" when I was a teen, as I would convince myself I was into men, but I would suddenly get uncomfortable and turned off once I had a real guy being interested in me in person. Slowly realized I had actually been a lesbian all along, and that's why I could never bring myself to date, kiss or get intimate with a man, even though in my head I would think about having a husband one day (this all prior to realizing I was a lesbian). I believe that
But if someone has no issues being intimate with a man and they cry comphet, she's just a fraud.
It's fucking hard, I feel for you nona. How to meet normal lesbians has been addressed many times in the past threads so do check out the older posts on the topic. TL;DR is be in a city, use HER/bumble etc but swipe left on anyone even remotely annoying while including dogwhistles on your bio, go to meetups and suck it up. You have to
sift through the annoying genderfucks and spicy hets if you want to meet real lesbians. It's just how it is and fixating on the challenging aspect will only have you sinking deeper into isolation.
It's easy as fuck to get bitter (I was bitter for a long time too) but you can't bring that energy into your new friendships as an opener. Sharing woes is great when you're a bit deeper into the friendship but don't establish them on doomertalk imo. Also, sometimes people seem like turbolibs with all sorts of qweer ideology but most of them only have a surface attitude in favor of it, due to ignorance/apoliticalness. You can easily talk to them about specific issues and find out most of them have no clue about the TRA behavior. For instance I'm in a mega-lib city and none
of the lesbians I met think you have to like girldick as a lesbian, just that you ought to treat transwomen as women in daily life which is not a big ask. We already do that IRL in order to avoid altercation lol. The ones I deepened my friendships all only date "afabs" and are often horrified at the sick shit "terf
" women go through. I've mostly been pleasantly surprised with the women I've met, though I was very picky with who I spent time meeting in person. Btw you can totally only swipe right on lesbians and express that you want to meet other lesbians in your bio, nobody will lynch you for that. Just don't tell people the reason you're excluding them (like when a bi/troon wants to be friends) and focus on the positive. You want to bond with other lesbians. Nobody is owed an explanation for that, trust me.
If you're serious about ending your isolation, you're gonna have to work pretty hard and keep motivated. I believe you can do it, though I know how hard it is first hand. Good luck out there.
I definitely feel the loneliness. I'm an unapologetic weeb and 10 years ago it was as easy as just walking to a convention group to find other lesbians or bisexuals to hang out with but now so many of them have trooned out or started dating men out of convenience, it's much easier to introduce a boyfriend to your parents. The rare "lesbians" (or at least those that identify as one) are underage yuri manga addicts or straight out transbians. I don't like hanging around normie style lesbians either because I'm an autistic nerd so dating apps or meetups just don't work for me as I genuinely can't connect with them. It would be nice to talk to someone about the woes of growing up a GNC lesbian and the baggage that it bears but the well-adjusted ones who have been dating the same girl since high school just don't understand where I'm coming from. The only people who seem to get it are those who identify as nonbinary transmasc genderspecials and they coped with it by picking up he/him pronouns instead.
Related but I'm more of a tomboy than a butch, due to this my coworkers don't clock me as a lesbian so they feel comfortable spilling out their homophobia and/or butchphobia in my presence. It's depressing to listen to jokes about ugly bulldykes and lesbians in general so instead of diving head first into conflict and making things awkward for everyone I just try to reason with them a bit and change the subject as fast as I can. Hearing peoples' unfiltered antigay statements like that makes me want to unironically rope.
God, yes, I feel this so hard. It's so difficult. Every single woman I meet that I click with is straight or bisexual and taken, and all lesbians I meet don't mesh well with me… and then the bisexuals who aren't taken are always genderspecials or anti-terf
. Sometimes I wonder if I really will be alone, and part of me wishes I could magically turn myself bi and date a man. It's so tough.
NTA but before I became more politically/feminist aware I used to be able to mesh with guys as friends, but not being into the moid aspect made feelings impossible, and I hated myself for that. I don't seek male friends anymore since my last male friends inevitably revealed themselves as coomers (which I guess is why if I woke up bi tomorrow I likely wouldn't date a man without extreme vetting, but past libfem me would) but I hate how it's easier to find a not completely hideous guy my age with similar dorky interests to drink with than a woman who is those things>>249960
At this point I'd love to meet a GC/Febfem bi woman but a lot of bi women within my interests or on apps are woke "pansexuals", she/theys, have a boyfriend and want a gf on the side…Even rural areas have queerios on the outskirts
when i realized i liked women i thought i had liked men because of comphet. in my experience it does seem to be easier to be one or the other instead of trying to explain you are bi with a preference for women. so in a way I get it for newly bisexual or questioning women. however, i know a lot of straight women who use it to explain why they suddenly overnight have an interest for women when they've exclusively slept with or dated men.
sage for blogpost
lol I follow a couple personal cows on radblr who have done this. It's funny because it's always the most loud, outspoken, aggressive 'lesbians' who do it. I get that sexuality is tough to figure out and I don't have anything against bi women who assume they're not into men because they haven't met an attractive one yet. But there's this very specific demographic of bi women who flock to radfem spaces and spend 50% of the year posting about how wonderful Nigel is and 50% of the year melting down about how they're really valid
lesbians for real and we're all goldstar incels for questioning it.
It's crazy how fast things have changed, i met my gf like three years ago on tinder, and back then you'd only see them every so often but now they're everywhere
I can't imagine what it would look like if I were to go in tinder rn, i think I would quickly give up ngl
I think people go with the dynamics they're most familiar and comfortable with, which explains the subculture.
I don't know if this is naive but I do think most relationships have a decision maker/doer and then someone who lets the other person do stuff. >>251381
Is a safer bet using fansites for girls love/manhwa/yuri? i just feel like at least you have something to talk about already if it's a hobby site, it's not upfront, it's less awkward, but you could meet girls like you there.
i know most shoujo ai/gl weeb spaces are full of men, but i think manhwa are at least more likely to be created and appreciated by women.
If you’re a lesbian looking for another lesbian, the chances are small. If you’re looking for another lesbian who likes the same stuff as you? Very difficult. I sometimes think you can have chemistry with someone you’re quite different to in interests. It’s sometimes necessary to adapt.
But yeah the internet is here so I’m sure there would be fansites to help you. What kind of nerdy stuff do you like?
I agree on focusing on chemistry and not too much on hobbies. Focusing on long term life goals (family, living arrangement, job), politics, and attraction would be far more beneficial for people in my view. Hobbies/interests can be shared in time and you may even discover something new that neither one of you expected to enjoy.
But maybe that's just my bias showing because I met my girlfriend thinking we didn't have enough in common on paper and turns out, we were extremely capable of the full spectrum of being into each other's lives. I was kinda guarded on hearing about one of her hobbies for a bit but it's just sweet hearing her talk my ear off about it now. I'm not gonna participate much myself but I love seeing her happy and it's good that she has something she can share with her friends which will help her be social. I don't want to be her sole provider, even though sometimes I want to be the only person in her world from how much I love her.
Ultimately it's helped us to be a bit different.
Ok i get what you’re saying. Yeah it sounds like you’re in a difficult place and I have absolutely no advice. >>252250
had a cute anecdote though, like plenty of straight couples have different interests but one small thing they both like. >>247569
I think I’m a little too late to seethe but she really made angsty 15 year old me feel understood with all the rage in her music. >>252334
To be honest growing up as a geek doesn't necessarily mingle with the so called normies due to the life experience typical to both demographics. I'm a functional person but have chronic depression due to being bullied for my eccentricity and ostracized and isolated to the nerd community that accepted me has affected both my character and world view to the point it's often impossible to have a meaningful relationship with someone who led an average life with its generic ups and downs. I can be cordial and make small talk with my coworkers for example and have good chemistry with them, but I would imagine them becoming frustrated at how I perceive things or even embarrassed by me liking weebshit. It's usually a normie party being judgmental.>>252355
Ellen Page is a lesbian, isn't she? Her girlfriend dumped her just before she trooned out iirc.
kek she would be my first choice too. detrooners aren't usually treated too kindly though but to have a celebrity detrans would certainly cause some discussion. i definitely wouldn't want jkr to come out as anything since lesbians have a hard enough time as it is without queen terf
saying she's one of us.
If you're questioning, bring it to the questioning thread. It's generally frowned upon to assume being lesbian is a 'phase' to grow out of, if you're feeling attractions to men then call yourself bi, there is no shame in being bi as long as you don't still pretend you're totally
lesbian and still talk about how you want to be with dudes.
Though I relate to the feeling. Before I understood my own feelings I dated a guy in school because he had a crush on me
and I thought I had to. Looking back it was awkward as hell, I didn't really let him touch me and I knew I didn't like him but he was the only person that asked me out so I felt like that was my only option. I still think to this day my family believes a man will come along and I'll be married to him like a good southern wife but I've always been adversed to marriage when imagining my life with a man. Obviously if you are looking for advice from these type of people they would tell you this, I can't tell you either way where your attractions lie, that's on you, but I will say don't just go with an option that is acceptable to other people.
I don’t feel any attraction to men. Don’t want to do anything with them, fictional or real, they just look boring and a little weird. I wanted to like men for a long time because i wanted to be ‘good’ and not be told I’m gross, and even then i didn’t get attraction to men. If i saw attractive women or women with attractive figures i would look away and try to think of something else so i wouldn’t pervert myself. I’m not questioning, I think I’m just beginning to accept myself as a homosexual. Also, I feel like I’m not masculine enough to be gay. Like my family sometimes says women with short hair ‘look gay’ so because mine is long and i. like skirts i feel like a sussy gay impostor. >>252651
That’s the thing, how do you know you yourself aren’t bi? For some of these women it takes like 30 years to ‘realise’, so could you say all lesbians could just be very very picky bisexuals? Or did these women just prefer women but choose to identify as Lenin until they found the right man? I hear so many people say that sexuality is fluid, but I’ve only liked one gender as long as i have felt attraction.
That being said i am kind of just playing the devils advocate here, i do believe a lot of these ex-lesbians were bi girls with a preference.
And definitely i wouldn’t be visible in any way, it’s not that I’m scared of violence, it’s more that other women may see me as an outsider/not one of them. >>252656
Based, inspirational, and a reminder to all of us to workout kek
AYRT (late reply), it's tough, so I kinda settled that I won't find anyone. Technically I'm opening my horizons to non-lesbians, I'd love to date a "terfy/queer-phobic" bi woman/febfem that's my type and creative-minded like me too (especially if we could collaborate on original fiction), but then they tend to be too old or too young. I really wish I came out a decade earlier. I try not to be bitter but it's frustrating how half of my younger (early 20s) friends can score a date on Tinder relatively easy (and yes, I've tried that too and almost got catfished since I'm dumb with these things) but women my age are already in LTRs with their sweetheart.>>252457
Heh, I relate a lot although I have autism/ADHD and other "cringe" disorders that affect things. I can LARP as normal pretty easy but I feel like a "how do you do, fellow kids" when it comes to the women I like who are the opposite of me and therefore chemistry-less.>>252388
Sage for slight derail, but didn't Cathy Brennan say she was nonbinary as a way to troll? I'd prefer JKR not come out as a lesbian, because she isn't (and it would have both bad implications due to her being the "terf
queen" and a domestic abuse victim
), but it would be funny if she tried to play TRA's game and be "you know what, I have no gender technically, so I'm agender". Or even, "I identify as a man now you can't call me a terf
since men can't be feminists".>>252661>That’s the thing, how do you know you yourself aren’t bi? For some of these women it takes like 30 years to ‘realise’
I've known some people like that and it's not the majority. You're probably young, so I don't want to be harsh, but in the last thread there was a similar girl who talked about how she only enjoys thinking about women but thinks not liking men is some mental block she can grow out of. Women who realize they're attracted to men later in life tend to have already known in some way but repress it for one reason or another, like guilt or being so attached to "lesbian" as a label. Sexuality is only fluid for bisexuals, some bi people feel like they're 50/50 but go to 90/10 and label themselves as something else during that period.
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I have such a painfully intense crush on my best friend, anons. She said that she feels the same way but we're at very different stages of life, so it wouldn't work. Ughh I wish she wasn't so perfect
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For real. Same with Kendall
Is there no way you two can work to get to a place where you could be on similar stages in life? I can't help but root for shit like this nonita!>>247457
Femme has completely lost its benign meaning, it only means a doctored, synthetic femininity (a la insta models with pounds of makeup and a totally contrived attitude) and every woman who is actually femme but just normal looking now gets gender dysphoria because they feel too masc to be femme. So stupid. I do think the gender-coded sublabels for lesbians is not really necessary anymore since we're not in a place where we have to conform to heteronormative dynamics every time.
Zendaya and Kendall are ever-so-slightly masculine sometimes, but butch?? lol. Zendaya in particular does have mannerisms that are not calculated in the delicate, hyper feminine way we're used to seeing from women in her status which is probably the main reason so many get "gay vibes" from her. Like she behaves in a blunt and kinda dorky manner often times. That and her utter failure to establish chemistry with anyone that she shares a scene with. I wouldn't say she has sexual chemistry with any women either though, she gives me asexual.
>>252936>There is nothing empowering about not shaving, cutting your hair short or wear ugly baggy clothes imo.
It may not be super "empowering" in the sense that women's rights will be pushed forward if I do it, but speaking from experience as someone who was pressured by family to do these things or else I would be ugly or unwomanly, it feels a lot better to dress comfortable and not shave or cake my face with makeup.
I only like fem women too, but not hyper
feminine. You can still look fem or have a naturally feminine body type/demeanor without shaving or wearing makeup (which I highly prefer), since you can still have good hygiene and groom without those things.>>252941
The butch4butch lesbians I know would also love to know where these masc buzzcut dykes even are, lmao. Even on TV most lesbians are mostly fem-looking.
Pretty sure you just pay more attention to them because they stand out from the crowd, plenty of lesbians look like normal people but they don't catch your eye because they're not kweer activists with a billion flag pins and alternative clothing, and most of them don't visit LGBT places for obvious reasons. For example I look like a completely average woman to the point I always have to hear this "Ew why do all
lesbians dress up so weird???" bullshit from people not aware of my sexuality.
You sound mentally ill kek
Lesbians are allowed to prefer feminine women
Well yes they're not normal meaning not conventionally styled. Also why shaving is considered male gaze ?… Having pubes while cunnilingus is a pain. And baggy clothes don't enhance the natural figure of a woman.>>253067
Yeah I was talking about LGBT spaces, bars more specifically.
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very obvious male bait, please nonnies stop responding to the moid
You can like whoever you like but calling women abnormal because they don't fit your standards and constantly running into mentally ill people means you're not that healthy either.>>253080
Do you know the definition of normal ? It refers to a norm. I said it was an unpopular opinion but damn I didn't except so much offence.
And if I don't have the same opinions as you I'm necessary a man, right. Ok nice lol !
So short haired women and women who don't always shave are out of the norm? Have you ever seen women irl?>>253121
My friendgroup consists of straight women and they don't wear makeup, do their hair or shave every day either. Yeah they'd do their makeup and style their hair if we were going out to somewhere fancy or there was an event but otherwise not really. It's not normal to be this obsessed with performative femininity. She's not attracted to women if seeing bodyhair or natural beauty disgusts her.
I don't think homophobia shouldn't appear in media at all, but it's really nice to have more light-hearted representation too. I like watching sitcoms to unwind, for example, so I'd love a good sitcom with a lesbian main character whose sexuality isn't the butt of a joke.>>253067
This. I'm pretty normal looking and when I go to lesbian events (especially outside of pride) 85+% of the women there look really normal. As someone who prefers butches it's honestly annoying how rare they are and how much competition there is for their attention.
I prefer when stories don't have homophobia. I respect that it helps you process your stuff but for me it does not help.
I like heavy subjects and hate romantic comedies though so finding a lesbian film/show that is both angsty but isn't about homophobia or lesbians being "crazy" (looking at you Duck Butter) or porny is like… yeah it feels impossible.
have you considered that some lesbians don't want to be lesbian
like i don't get it some insane women literally go and mutilate their own bodies because they don't wanna be gay but straight instead and try to become men and that's understandable and something that people agree with, yes of course some women go and get their damn tits cut off etc bodyhorror shit because of homophobia, but somehow trying to become straight by having straight sex is completely unthinkable behavior
>>253135>wants shaved long haired women with makeup>well it's not a bimbo!
There's definitely a moid baiting, this is one of his posts along with calling lesbians ugly and unkempt. He's trying to start an infight, please don't fall for it.
Stop trying to start infights. If you wanna bring bisexuals do it in the questioning thread or vent in the vent thread if you just want to vent. >>253215
This is true and very sad.
>>253079>Also why shaving is considered male gaze ?
I can't tell if you're dumb or a moid baiting, but do ever remember having your mom force you to shave because it's "gross"/"unladylike" and whatnot? And it's male gazey because moids tend to think being a hairless Barbie doll is peak attractive. Also I don't like crazy forest bushes either but I'd rather a woman at least trim than imitate a child and wax her crotch completely.
>And baggy clothes don't enhance the natural figure of a woman.
Ok? Women don't have to always look pretty for you either… Like I said in another post, I only like fem women too but I also like natural femaleness too (no makeup or waxed hair).>>253145
It depends, however I personally find it cathartic when fantasy does have homophobia. I don't have full-on magic fantasy OCs but my worlds do have some form of -ism since I use it as an outlet to vent.>>253168
I'm a "non gold star" because I was assaulted. Does that count as being "pure enough" or should I have just known better, lmao?
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bump, be careful with scrolling
I love piers and arcades lets go on a date ♥
things I would do w my gf if I had one:
go on road trips
start a really bad girl band
rent airbnb in mountains and go skinny dipping at some waterfall
go for long walks in middle of night
make out by a nice bonfire or fireplace
what would you do?
Then talk with your gf about it, how you feel uncomfortable. Your girlfriend isn't mentalist, give her a chance by expressing your feelings to her. Otherwise you'll end up resentful.
I would personally tell her to block him since I don't value online relationships+this guy clearly wants to fuck her. But that's a very personal opinion as I don't know you, her or the guy. But the first step is to tell her your feelings are hurt.
It's one thing to have unrequited feelings for someone who you know isn't attracted to your sex full stop.. it's another thing to voice those feelings repeatedly. He's trying something there. I had male friends do this shit when I was younger and looking back I wish I had cut them off sooner because it's disrespectful for them to keep trying to plant that seed in your head. There's no grey zone where him voicing that over and over again is somehow innocent and not just passive aggressive horny male behaviour. Most people feel unrequited feelings at some point but he's handling it in a douchebag way.
Is she young enough to legit be naive about his nature here? In my early twenties I was legit that naive and I wasn't enjoying the attention, I just didn't see it for what it really is.
So weird. It can happen to have a male friend crushing on you and shooting his shot, but him trying it over and over? I would be really uncomfortable and cut him off myself. And the fact he even tries to break you two up makes things worse.
Don't even know what to say, I don't understand why is your gf allowing him to be so disrespectful both to her, you and her relationship. She's either bi and keeps him sniffing around because she's half-interested, or she really needs to strengthen her self esteem and set boundaries.
I would honestly not stand for this and would confront the guy instead of my girlfriend if she's not comfortable enough to be direct with him. Even if they've been friends for a decade it's still extremely inappropriate behavior and very disrespectful. Agree with >>253928
too, she's either keeping him on standby or needs your intervention.
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I've never had sex with any other girl than my gf and lately I've been fantasizing about having a hoe phase. I love my girl and I'm not even the kind of person to hoe around but damn, these fantasies are hitting rn.
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oh shit this is so cute nonnie
, it's gonna hurt but I will answer too
-go to the cinema/watch movies at home and spend hours talking about it
-go to museum together, and I take tons of photos of her and all the art pieces
-read in confortable silence in a dedicated comfy area
-take long walks together, especially in nature
-massage her head and play with her hair if it relaxes her
-furnish and decorate a living space where we can feel at home
-encourage eachother to do all sorts of weird art and crafts
-kiss her hands at any moment of the day if she's ok with it (it sound weird but I really love this medieval display of affection kek)
-cook her her favorite food
Feeling very maidenless today kek
you sound very online, maybe surround yourself with less toxic
content. i'm sorry your parents are homophobic, im sure that doesnt help.
I think your partner is supposed to also be your best friend. there are many different forms of intimacy, maybe you can build them up over time. also you dont have to do anything you dont want. sounds like you dont feel comfortable dating a woman even in your personal space, so it makes sense youre not comfortable being out in public. thats fine, maybe work on your inner acceptance and confidence first and then take some small steps.
btw its okay to be gay and work with children.
if this has happened to both of you before it seems extra insensitive that she would keep being friends with this guy. i think you need to talk to her and explain what you’re feeling.
i was in a similar situation where i had some casual guy friends who were clearly trying to hit but as i was young and naive at the time (i was 19) i didn’t really realise it for what it was. i told my girlfriend about it and she was told me they clearly don’t have good intentions and are just biding their time so i broke it off with those guys because i ultimately didn’t value their “friendship” as much much as i valued my girlfriend and i also didn’t feel comfortable being friends with dudes who i realised are only sticking around on the off chance they could fuck. it also just wasn’t respectful to my relationship to my girlfriend. it’s different here because this dude sounds like he’s closer friends with your girlfriend but i think any self respecting lesbian wouldn’t keep guys like this around. maybe she’s insecure or maybe she’s secretly bisexual i don’t know but i know that i wouldn’t want to keep being friends with a guy who clearly just wants to fuck.
i used to be naive and projected my own experiences onto these guys. i used to fall for my straight friends and i was able to continue being friends with them whilst i got over my feelings so when i was younger and didn’t really know any guys (went to an all girls school) i assumed men would be the same. they’re not and i was in for a shock as i entered the adult world and realised that plenty of guys only act friendly with girls if they think they can hit.
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made me chuckle
Sounds like a load of excuses on her side and the story seems inconsistent as fuck (now she sexted this guy, now it's another guy, now it was just looking for attention, now it's "self harm") and the trying to turn it around by saying "No actually I
worry that you will drop me for a man" despite what's happening seems textbook bullshit. I've seen this before.
I got a bad feeling about this, and you probably have it too since you mentioned getting bad vibes from this, but I do hope we're both wrong and there's nothing going on between your gf and this guy. Did you settle the thing about this guy sniffing around and trying to break you up? Is she going to cut him off or stop his insinuations in any way?
She knows. Her outlook on her past was that it didn't matter but for me it does, so there was some misalignment in terms of expectations on disclosure between us. We had a talk about all of it. Bottom line is neither one of us wants a bi partner and we agreed to confront the other if one of us has a late bloomer situation.
Also just wanna clarify on an earlier point made, it was my speculation
that the sexting was self harm at a time where she was dealing with being dumped by her transitioning gf, not something she said as justification. Also there is only one guy involved in this whole thing, it was never multiple guys. Not sure what gave that impression. Again thanks a lot to the nonitas that chimed in regardless. It means a lot to get perspective and I feel stronger as far as facing future consequences go.
the mental illness is you being pressed at other people's sexual preferences and constantly talking about how horrible men are while comparing lesbians to them at every chance you get just because some don't want to date bisexuals you lesbophobic creep>>254265
yeah and it's the bis
You don't get why men and lesbians get mad about being cheated on
? Did you even understand what was being discussed or did you just drop by to insult lesbians
>>254305>you're just like men for not wanting to be cheated on or lied to about your partner's sexuality
they think it's fine to casually call lesbians psychos just for openly daring to say they've never dated/fucked a man, and it's perfectly ok to call lesbians incel men every 5 seconds for having a problem with literal cheaters, but i can't call them a bisluts and dick suckers for those things or else they jump to the lesbophobe's/cheater's defense by saying >>254264
"lesbians behaving like incels. not even surprised" as their big feminist gotcha lol
Because there are newfags/moids who intentionally try to start lesbian/bisexual infights. I don't care about goldstar shit and hate how it's brought up as a gotcha in every retarded infight. Literally a lesbian refusing to date someone because they've been dating men for years isn't lesbo/biphobia, it's a preference and lesbians probably know most of those girls will attempt to settle down with men later so wasting time on them is useless. >>254303
You sound like one of those kiwifags who are upset lesbians won't date him to resort to calling them incels in a poor attempt to uno-reverse. Kek.
lmao i’m a gold star too and it’s not because I figured it out before men it’s because the few times men tried to be intimate with me I sperged out and left.
It was a literal “dad come get me I’m scared”
you know that acting like an incel has different meaning nowadays ie you act like a misogynist and calling women dicksuckers is exactly that. you are a misogynist.
but you know what since both of you >>254355
focus so much on the incel quip instead of what i actually said, that calling women dickriders and bisluts is indeed psycho (and dare i say it again, incelic) behavior, i kinda think that insult hit the target! hope you get dates soon(infighting)
Except you are just like men for caring about the gender a woman leaves you for. Stop being gross and entitled. Bisexuals date both genders so who gives a shit? If she dumps you then it doesnt make her bisexuality any less valid
. Some of you lescels are insane
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No one wants you kek
I dont give a fuck if lesbians dont date bisexual women but if you date one and she leaves you for a man and you act as if it invalidates her bisexuality then youre just as gross as an entitled moid who rages. For people who whine about “MUH HOMOPHOBIA” so much you have no issue invalidating someones sexuality all the time and acting just as insufferable as straight people(infighting)
A bisexual woman dumping you for a man isnt being cheated on kek
You truly cant read. All i said was it doesnt fucking matter if she dumps you for a woman or a man shes still bisexual and it doesnt make her attraction to women any less valid
Dear BPD-chan, the topic of discussion was a (possible) lesbian-identified bisexual woman cheating on her gf with her male friend. It's you who can't read.
You can also reply to multiple posts in the same post, you don't have to shit up the entire thread with your non-sequitur ramblings every time you browse it.
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Sorry to sperg but I'm so tired ladies, so fucking tired of the lack of decent (or actual) lesbians in my city, it's all either fucking troons (ffs even if you chopped your disgusting dick off hell no will I EVER want to sleep with a scrote at all, and no one is going to gaslight me into thinking this is acceptable, nasty ass incels) but the only other options is a specific type of butch lesbian I just can't stand (short/obese/dress and act like 13 year old boys and come with the same edgy "humor" and shit, like I went on a date with one but she didn't realize I'm just a pale af Arab and called some poor hijabi girl minding her business a sand ni**) like where can I find a cool, tall woman with nice arms who will let me eat her out and we can watch my awful turkish dramas and knafeh with?
Obsessed BPD-chans shitting up a thread that's not even theirs.
Stop crying about how leaving a woman for a man and cheating on her with a man is based in the same sentence you call any lesbian that rejects you incel. Kek.
Anon is right you really are cockbreaths because you simply can't keep cocks and men out of your mouth, everything has to be about them and you need to shit up threads about how it's so based normal that bi women will leave and cheat on lesbians with shitty men and that this totally doesn't mean lesbians can "invalidate" their true and honest homosexuality.
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88% of bisexuels are in a heterosexual relationship. It's then understandable for a gay person to not engage with bisexuals. Especially since with age, the social pressure to be with the opposite sex increases.
Before judging the fear of some lesbians, check the facts. Their fear is valid.
It's a moid baiting once again. "You're just like genderbent incels!!111" is their go-to insult they love to throw around like confetti.
That said it's annoying when bis don't understand how hurtful it is to be left for a man, 90% of bisexuals are in a heterosexual relationship because so many have a lesbian bout in their 20's and then once their biological clock starts ticking or they leave college for regular work life with normies they swiftly marry the first Nigel they come across. So a lot of lesbians just don't see the point in wasting their time with them. Plus as someone who actually is dating a bisexual girl it's gross when she's gushing over sexy moids that I find hideous or tolerable at best.
No advice to give but you sound cute nonnie
. I hope you can find the cool, tall woman of your dreams soon!
Come to Paris anon, I adore kadaif.
Now that I'm thinking about it. What's your typical first date anons and do you pay ? I like gallantry but not many women returned me the favor lol. Usually it's a beer in a seedy bar dressed in jeans. Which is sad. I think getting dressed and going to a nice place is so seductive.
>>254523>you expect anyone to believe you're either not a moid or that fucking so many has done irreversible mental damage
Kek. I love you anon. That dumbass has been mocking lesbians the whole time but got so triggered
when someone called her a dicksucker or whatever which is actually supposed to be a valid
part of her sexuality.
thank you queen, hope nothing but love and good arabic food for you >>254486
very diff but I once dated a Native girl and she took me to her families potluck and it was so nice and fun for our second date after I paid for our first date. They kept on feeding me and I really loved the hospitality (also she had these amazing abs, like damn I miss her so much now)
again, what schizophrenia is this.
once again i see the incel insults hit the target, hope you get dates soon you incelic misogynists and so on.
lescel meme is real sometimes, you can cry about lesbophobia but i am a lesbian myself and i actually do not date bisexual women myself either kek, i just can go on about it without throwing tantrums about it.
i can reject women without calling them cocksuckers and other unhinged INCEL LITE behavior, and i personally never even said anything about lesbians having to date bis, just that you don't need to insult women but you are so unhinged in your paranoia that just saying that mayhaps calling women dickriders is wrong it makes you lose your shit over it, which honestly is way more BPD-like behavior. the black and white thinking and all that, you know.
and funny thing that i have noticed during the years especially in online circles is that the most unhinged cockbreath insult throwing maniacs often turn out to be bisexuals themselves kekkkk
>>254814>Why are you calling lesbians misogynistic men
that's your own insecurities speaking. i never called you a man, i called you incel like. i happen to be one of those people who thinks women can be misogynist too and i don't think women are good people by just the virtue of being women, and that women have some responsibility over their behavior. like i actually do think some bisexual women uphold lesbophobic things with their behavior like calling themselves lesbians while dating men
if you read that calling you a man that's your own damn problem and your own insecurities speaking. again and again, what i said was "calling women dickriders and cocksuckers is wrong and misogynist" and you throw a tantrum about it
I like your energy anon. I wish I could say I'm super picky with personalities but for me I look for intense physical attraction first. If that's not there, I'm out. My attraction isn't for a narrow type so I just meet people and sometimes there is a magnetic draw, none of these women even look similar besides being slim and having nice skin. After the initial attraction I start to discern traits more and see if I can make a relationship work with her. Things I look for are an ability to function independently, ability to set boundaries and respect them, self confidence or at least an interest in self-care. Intellect and sense of humor are big too, I want there to be wit in our conversations. I look for tenderness less than I should. Sometimes I get stuck on a woman who is so cerebrally compatible but does not have the emotional bandwidth. Emotional connections are hard for me to forge due to fear as well, I hide myself sometimes. So a certain disarming force from my gf is a huge plus.
I was lucky enough to find someone who fits what I'm looking for and she has actually avoided dating for years so she could find someone she is truly invested in and impressed by. It's a little overwhelming to be told I'm exactly the kind of woman she has been looking for but it also makes me feel kinda proud.
I really can't think of a better choice. I assumed it would be easier to hide since we'd be living in different continents. I know they'd never hunt me down if they did find out, they're lovely people who were victims
of indoctrination. It's just that they're very old and frail and telling them that I'm gay is basically saying "Hey the daughter that you raised and love is going to suffer in hell for eternity". That would destroy them, I don't want to risk making them go through that. Cutting them off isn't much better either because I still love them very much despite everything. This issue has been on the back of my mind for years now, and it's only gotten worse as they age/get sick and need my help more. All I can do for now is prepare to leave and hope I figure it out once I'm more or less stable abroad
NTA but it's extra hard to find someone in the west willing to live a double life like that, especially if you move to a city and not somewhere more rural. I personally would not date someone who needs to keep me a secret in any capacity. I want my partner to be fully out and able to include me in any reasonable activity like work parties or family functions. I'm an immigrant from a Muslim country, though grew up with a non-muslim family
. It isn't your responsibility to coddle your parents but I get why you don't wanna come out to them anyway. Tough situation, you're totally right to just focus on relocating for now. Best of luck!
Happy and proud for you also! >>254841
I hope you focus on yourself and escape asap also! Check out Rainbow Railroad in Canada, they help LGBT people escape their own home countries, if you can write to them or similar organizations to help you? For me I was lucky in that while my mom is Christian but ironically more disappointed in me but thankfully she has come around, my dad who is Muslim didn't mind at all, but that's more for a sad family history, where his brother/my uncle who was gay was sadly killed for it back in the 90s.
But for me the situation wouldn't turn me off, I dated women who have had to hide it from their families, but they were low contact with them and I wouldn't want to ever pressure them into revealing themselves because I know how dangerous it can be but it would be frustrating (and was for me at times) I know to have to live your life hiding such a big part of it, sorry habibi nonna I don't have any solid advice really to give I guess but I hope your situation really does improve and you find love and acceptance wherever you end up!!
lmao no several anons commented calling lesbians men, just as bad as men or simply categorising us as the same as men for caring about being cheated on and the only reason anyone called you dickriders and cocksuckers (which is supposed to be a valid
part of your bisexuality anyway so what's with the shame?) is because bigen was busy calling lesbians who've never been with men psycho shit, nutters, moids and saying they harass women when clearly the opposite is true. now you're here with the "incel militant secretly bi" projection when it's actually bis who want lesbians to date them and flipped out because some of us said no
. Unfortunately women here have no problems using incel words (like cocksuckers, talking about how women suck dick etc) just like moids but will get upset if you call them out on it. Just typical incel lite behavior
You're ashamed of your own sexuality. Sucking dick is literally a part of your sexuality and it's not an insult because of that fact alone.>>254875
Some bi women mocked lesbians who weren't "goldstar" because of abuse or wrong choices and tried to argue they must be bi too, since they fucked a man once. They also called lesbians psychos if they were goldstars. Anon called only those bi women cocksuckers, she didn't randomly attack everyone and even then, her calling them cocksukers isn't much different than bi women thinking most lesbians would fuck men because they themselves don't.
my girlfriend is from east asia and from a very conservative christian family. she was straight up with me when we first started dating and said she can’t tell her family she’s gay. they wouldn’t understand and she’d likely be disowned. she actually broke down in tears to me like 4 months into our relationship because she didn’t think we would be able to get married and she didn’t want to disappoint me. now three years on she is planning to fully immigrate to my more liberal country where we will live together. not so sure about marriage yet - she said she’d feel weird if we got married and my entire family was at the wedding and she just had a few friends who knew she was gay, but i’m not too fussed.
really you should be honest straight away about this, especially if you think the woman you’re into is looking for a serious relationship, it’s just a waste of both of your time if you’re not. and don’t stay with anyone who says they’re okay with it but then pressures you into coming out
>>254870>which is supposed to be a valid part of your bisexuality anyway
again with the schizophrenia. anyone who says calling women cocksuckers is wrong must be a bisexual evil witch bitch woman or whatever, you think lesbianism is some sort of political identity instead of a sexuality so you cannot accept that some lesbians like me disagree with you. you think lesbianism is some sort of political identity.
you are blaming me for shit i never said. all i said is that calling women dick riders is wrong and incel like, but because you think lesbianism is a personality or some sort of act you personally follow instead of just simple sexual attraction to women you cannot accept that some lesbians think differently from you! sorry polilezzie but it doesn't work like that>>254884
plike here. polilezzie bullshit, if someone disagrees with you you cannot comprehent that they share a sexuality with you because you view sexuality as a personality and a political identity
oh now we're at the "i was just acting retarded" part of polilez bullshit.
i dunno you seem to think calling women dicksuckers is hurtful enough since you wanna use those words as insults towards other women, don't try to act as if you never thought you weren't trying to hurt others when you used those words. we live in a culture in which women are made feel dirty and disgusting about their own sexualities and reducing women into nothing but "dicksuckers" or "cockbreaths" is also centering those women around men, that they as persons are nothing but servants to males and their cocks.
and speaking of insults, rugmuncher was/is an insult that lesbians heard very often and lesbians were insulted for wanting to lick pussy but hey if being a lesbian is nothing but an online identity for you i guess you never ever had to hear those insults. like sure i "munch the rug" but still people who called me a rugmuncher used that word to insult me, to make me ashamed of my sexuality, to make me seem perverted etc no matter how that describes my real sexual behavior. they meant to insult and shame me, you meant to insult and shame others at least be honest enough like the homophobes who happily admit that they invent and use words like rugmuncher to insult others and don't try to act coy like "well how is calling women cockbreaths insulting anyone" fucking own it at least coward
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Everybody shut up and look at this
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offtopic but andrea dworken never even been translated to my language now that i googled her smh should have been born 40 years earlier and i could have been a feminist scholar
ANYWAY let's talk about happy stuff i post granny dreams of life being together with your wife pictures
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i want this life so much
Excuse your ignorance, but as a lesbian it's pretty hard not to know what a feminist lesbian is and who their influences are.
Why? Because your types have invaded our community since the beginning of time to be the shining lights and anti-misogyny guard dogs for the poor minority of women who suck dick. Yes, straight and bi women tend to suck dick. Sorry that trigers your polilez spidey senses.
Keep writing essays about real lesbians being men lite or incels because lesbians are grossed out by their girlfriends lying about their sexuality and cheating, or because lesbians can beat lesbophobes at their own game by dishing out some deserved backlash, cheapshots or not.
We don't exist for you - or the victims
of men that you're whiteknighting - to escape the evilness of men which you just ranted about here like a safe space. Lesbianism isn't your radical feminist haven where we have to accept being stepped on because a man was mean to you once and lesbians standing up against your bullshit reminds you of it. Get help.
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i can post more of this artist if you want but if you don't like them sorry for the spam but this is like my granny dream to have a wife to have fun with as a granny
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>>254932>Keep writing essays about real lesbians being men
never did, you are letting your own insecurities speak again. blahblalbhalblah we dont exict to you blaablaa paranoia shit just because i said that calling women cocksucker is wrong take your victim
shit and shove it up your ass idiot
>>254935>Keep writing essays about real lesbians being men lite or incels because lesbians are grossed out by their girlfriends lying about their sexuality and cheating, or because lesbians can beat lesbophobes at their own game by dishing out some deserved backlash, cheapshots or not.
In the future, avoid butting into /lg/ conversations that you're not a part of, just to use single words from them as an excuse to spam unrelated tirades for days, and then pretend to act surprised when multiple people tell you you definitely don't understand what was happening and only sound deranged.
That way you won't be warned by a mod for infighting once again.
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perhaps multiple people are idiotic and at least it is me who actually has dreams of growing old together with a woman i love! report me again for saying that calling women cocksuckers is wrong lmao polilezzie
I have to give you credit for how dedicated you are to projecting.>>254440
Why does every BPD chan on this board type exactly the same too? I always get a good laugh from the frenzied low caps stan twitter girlboss hysterics.
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bpd obsession kinda screams like projection, once again, black and white thinking. you cannot accept that people who share your sexuality could have different opinions from you
and i at least tried to bring this thread into more positive place with my art posts but i guess it is in vain! anyway
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be happy and become a granny with your wife like i said this is my dream life to be fat and old and wrinkly and happy
When at least three different anons can see the BPD in you from miles away, it's time to take your fingers off the keyboard for a second. Just one second.
And your self-righteous feminist lectures against lesbians - for not coddling bisexuals being lesbophobic - rest on your own inability to accept lesbians have different opinions from you on these subjects, and cries of "but I'm defending women from misogyny by calling you incels" aren't your get out of jail free card for literally just defending lesbophobes from backlash.
You do not even understand what the conversation was because your personality disorder wasn't part of it before it started bombing the thread to shreds with buzzwords.
>and i at least tried to bring this thread into more positive place with my art posts but i guess it is in vain! anyway
You mean by continuing to spam? The past 20 shitposts are yours.
me: "calling women cocksuckers is wrong"
you: AAGAHGUHAHGAHAH BPD BPD INSANE ALSSADHSDGDSAJ
look i don't give a shit what you mentally ill women think, i know i am right: insulting women is wrong, no matter what great cause you have behind those insults, i don't create all these conspiracy stories inside my head about you or anyone else. i just say: insulting women with terms like cockbreath is wrong, never questioned are you a woman, never came up with these conspiracy theories of you being a kiwiperson or something, or being a person from some other thread
i just judged your behavior in this thread, called a spade a spade, you throw a tantrum, put words in my mouth, form whatever enemy image of me about me inside of your head
because i said calling women cocksuckers isn't very nice
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anyway i came back to post more art
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like you are not actually responding to things i say but things you think i say? my esl of course makes my words unclear but my point wasn't anything about heterophobia?
weirdoes you are
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unhinged? lol. you are not arguing with me but with some imaginary person?
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this is legit weird behavior like i might have beenb funny funny womaning here before but you are WEIRD
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Both of you shut the fuck up.
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i'm screaming because of this thread i was trying to find work from this one lesbian artist from my country but instead i found this many years old article from this one person i know in real life in one of my country's biggest newspapers talking about how she is a lesbian who fell in love with a man?
okay i gotta admit i understand why people are so paranoid but oh my god lol never thought that she would be like that
but i try to bring more happy things so more art
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"for hygienic reasons i will become a lesbian"
oh yeah did you know smoking was seen as a lesbian thing one point so in old movie smoking woman was a dog whisle for a lesbian
rökande kvinnor är lesbiska
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love this art, anon. keep em coming
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this artist made a lesbian comic but i don't know if it is in english?
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at what point do you consider age gaps to be problematic in a lesbian relationship? 5, 10, 15, 20+ years? do you think is the same as heterosexual relationships?
It's not the same as het age gaps. If both parties are past their 20s it's not really problematic
imo, but while in one's 20s it's important to avoid age gaps bigger than 3 years imo. I personally don't like the idea of dating someone other than my peers.
Even though I know it happens, I don't think women generally can be as predatory as older men dating younger women. But for example someone in their late 30's dating a girl in her early 20's for example is sketchy in other ways, it makes me wonder if she has some emotional problems that cause her not to connect with people her own age, not that she's outright exploiting the younger girl like a man would. But stuff like someone in her mid 20's dating a woman in her early 30's isn't problematic
at all to me. It depends a lot of the context and their age group, like once you reach your mid 40's there doesn't seem to be a limit to how much older your partner is.
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I'm 18 but mostly attracted to women who are 45-80. I don't think age gaps are inherently bad if the younger person is over say 25, so right now (even though it's my fantasy) I'd side eye the shit out of a 50 yr old lez who wanted anything more than a one night stand. I can't wait to get older lol, women only get lovelier with age
Are you saying you would date someone up to 80 years old?!? Not judging I just couldn't see myself
dating anyone as old as my mom or older than my grandma. I'm in my early 20s and would probably only date someone in their early 30s at most.
I saw a video with a large age gapped couple they were getting a lot of flack because they wanted to have a baby. People were more mad about them wanting to have a baby with their age gap than they were about them being a lesbian couple which is kinda funny, no one bats an eye when there is a big age gap hetero couple and the moid accidentally gets the younger girl pregnant, if there's nothing wrong with that what's the problem with this?
Probably healthier than basic age gap hetero couple where moid gets the girl pregnant to trap her or has a weird fertile young girl fetish and only uses her for that. Ew.>>255280
You and me both, anon. It's one of the reasons I'm not afraid of aging, I see older women as beautiful and every sign of aging only adds to women's beauty.
nooo anon…i want this so badly. i want our hallway to be filled with pictures of stuff we did together, and to slow dance in our living room in candlelight>mfw i just realised im describing Ellie and Carl from Up if they were lesbians>>255398
when i was growing up i remember being like 'omg booba booba' and now i still appreciate them, it's just a little calmed down. i do think we get used to our own bodies. anyway i've become a thigh enjoyer
but if i really like a girl everything she does is attractive and looks matter less
I feel this way about nudity too, I took a bunch of art classes and I don't really view a fully nude body as inherently sexual or provocative like moids do, it's literally just the human form. I think it's hotter if someone is halfway in their clothes if that makes sense. I saw this female firefighter in the store the other day halfway in uniform doing casual shopping and thought that was extremely attractive to me.>>255416
I wonder if we're attracted to traits we don't have, like I used to want darker skin so bad and now I find tan skin super attractive. I'm also kinda average height and like taller girls, but I'm not picky about heights either. >>255419
Yes personality makes or breaks attraction for me, it doesn't matter if they are cute if they are annoying. But their appearance can grow on me if I like their energy. I still do hope whatever physical traits I have someone will enjoy and i will enjoy hers too
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I have a faint memory of this being discussed before but do you nonnies think you can be butch with long hair? I usually identify as butch due to having masculine mannerisms, way of dressing and all the other things but I like keeping my hair at almost waist length. I don't feel long hair is necessarily "effeminate" because plenty of masculine men like to grow theirs out but very often the classification seems to be based on hair length (I'm also a bit of a metalhead so I'm biased). I used to date a girl who had short hair and despite dressing and acting super feminine she was read as a "butch", does having long hair but otherwise masculine vibe just automatically make you "just" a tomboy or a futch?
I'm probably just insecure but I often feel like the cute girls I meet are borderline disappointed that I sport long hair because they want a Male Light complete with an undercut and a pair of gigantic biceps.
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Butch to me doesn't mean short hair and cargo shorts, it can be more of someone's mannerisms or they way she talks. Long hair length isn't always associated with masc/femme energy just as an example Audrey Hepburn characteristically had short hair and I doubt anyone would call her butch for it.
The hair alone doesn't make or break it but like you said to outsiders it can often be the very first thing they see. I'd never look at a woman in a dress with a pixie cut and think 'ah yes butch' but I feel like some men might manage to. It's a combination of things that come together.
Maybe getting ot but butch mannerisms and body language like in that pic.. I'm butch leaning myself and I sometimes get second hand embarrasment from how ott some womens masc body language is. Idk why I get like that but I do. It's not like I don't have a bit of it going on myself but sometimes it reaches a level that feels too put on?
idk, i date butches almost exclusively and i think it's kind of cute. it's a social signifier like any other, so it makes sense that they want it to be immediately noticeable - even when they're obviously playing it up i think it's more endearing than cringy
i'm not trying to condescend or armchair psychoanalyze you or anything but it sounds a little like you're worried other women will see you the way you see them.
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I'm fucking tired of people policing what lesbians can and can't do. Why are we always living in other people's heads rent free? The only people that should be concerned with what lesbians are doing are other lesbians. Fucking exhausting.
Picrel whenever a lesbian mentions doing anything at all to men, bis, hets, troons, and normie women.
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Related to the discussion above but god, I need to vent. I fucking HATE it when obvious bihets butt in to the discussion about LGB rights to act like bigoted straights. You know the type, the one who says shit like "I agree that Pride is unnecessary, gay people have enough rights already" and "I'm bi and I don't mind homophobic jokes tee hee" or "I'm bi and I agree that LGB people are encouraging dangerous heterophobia". Sis you have been dating men exclusively for the past decade and you're engaged or married to a moid so keep your fucking mouth shut. You have never been subjected to legitimate homophobia and this """hate from the LGB community""" you get for being """bisexual""" is because you're a straight person completely unempathetic and oblivious to the struggles gay people face and thus unable to understand the nuance in making an ironic joke about straight people to demonstrate what gay people have to deal with on a daily basis. Not because you're """bisexual""" (or more often "pansexual") and mean lesbians and gays and other bis are bullying you for no reason at all. Fuck off.
How can you tell whether you are attracted to someone or you just really admire them?
i thought i just wanted to be this woman's friend but now i'm psychoanalyzing a text i sent her. i think i'm might be infatuated to her.
btw i'm not questioning, i know i'm lesbian.>>256331>Is it going to end when they make normies start to hate lesbian and gays again?
no, it's when the generation that calls themself queer to look quirky gets to the marrying and starting a family age. then it's not cool to be lesbian/gay anymore.
There's a lesbian bar nearish to me called Pearls.
I like >lebanese
Lmao the contrast between woman enjoyer and pussy faggot you’re like the jeckyl and hyde of lesbians>>256967
Yes but the one positive about being in a minority group is that you are allowed to say more slurs, and that is epic>>256963>Lebanese
Added to the list and that gave me a kek
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very nice flier i saw. i love butches in denim
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In your experiences, which do you think is more prone to hookups, butches or femmes? I really want to just hookup with someone to get this out of my system, but I'm also at odds about my monogamous feelings, I don't want to be just an 'experience' for someone. I wish it could work out and turn into a relationship after that, but usually that's not how it pans out.
Just be honest and end it, I'd be so depressed if my girlfriend talked about me like this. >>256967
Idk anon I thought pearl divers and lady gardeners were cute lol
Because oddly, I’m the one not wanting to be intimate not her. And I don’t exactly know why.
All of you tell me Im disgusting and that I should dumb her but its been years we’re together. I love
*I love her.
I wanted to know if there was any of you who went through a similar experience and how you dealt with it. Not judgement.
we deal with it by not being pieces of shit
damn I feel bad for your girlfriend. just let her go, she deserves someone that wants to touch her, doesn't want to cheat and make excuses for it, someone better than you.>no judgement
then stop being so shit
you're flirting with other girls behind your girlfriend's back and contemplating cheating on her, did you really expect not to get judgement? fuck outta here with the victim
mentality, your girlfriend is the victim
here. break up with her if you really love her because as other anons said, she deserves better than you and you're wasting her time
I get the hostility, I'm definitely not the victim
. But some qualified advices would be great. I can't be the only one to have gone through intimacy issues in her relationship, right?
Do the decent thing and break the news to her now before it escalates to you fully cheating. Being consumed with those thoughts isn't something you can work your way back from or salvage esp as you're flirting already. Be mindful of how it would feel to be on her side of things, kept in the dark about this, your time wasted. Even that is insulting. There's a reason why you're being judged, it's because she's in a worse position than you right now, you're in a position to either really hurt her or be better than that.
It always sucks to end a relationship (first love in particular) but being cheated on goes on to affect that other person for years into their future. Leaves them with trust issues and sometimes image and self esteem issues that affect their future relationships too. It's kinder to end it now because wasting her time or letting it escalate is legit a really shitty thing to do to someone. This is bigger than just you and her. This is you contemplating damaging someone in a way that will stick with them. And you've already crossed lines. Like listen to the judgement because you need to hear it.
stop acting like a scrote and break up with her
you already hurt her by not being intimate with her and not communicating, she probably already has some issues because of it you moid
I can't imagine being jealous of gay men and their std-infested asses but you do you anon
your best bet for casual sex tho is probably lesbians that are in open relationships, I see them all the time on dating apps
I confess: I love cavewomen.
Not real cavewomen. I mean Eep from The Croods was kind of a baddie but I digress
There’s this really tall and awkward girl from my old workplace. Romanian, doesn’t speak so much English. We’re the youngest there, most people our age wouldn’t work like this. And she’s so. Bloody. Awkward. Can’t make normal eye contact, can’t sit in a chair on lunchbreak without stretching her long legs in every direction. But she’s so comfortable with her gangly awkwardness, she reminds me of a cavewoman. She’s awkwardly taking up space and it reminds me of a cavewoman in a city for the first time. I can’t explain the appeal, but I became rather infatuated from afar, or close, as we sat opposite each other and she didn’t know how much eye contact was appropriate so she just stared straight at me like it was normal, no fear, but without vitriol. I think I adore awkward women. Especially when they own it so fearlessly. Gosh I want her to throw me ooga booga
Sorry in advance if this confession was bizarre and offensive.>>257904
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I get you
Enough. Shut the fuck up. Read the thread already.
Anyway what kinda flowers should I buy for my gf this weekend? It's out first spring together so I wanna be sweet.
A big beautiful mix with lots of texture and a warm color scheme, I'm thinking white, orange, yellow, pink. Sunflowers, dahlias, daisies, wildflowers, carnations, sprigs of lavender, maybe black eyed Susans.
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I'm going to suggest to my gf that we make lovers eye jewelry! I think it's so lovely and personalized and romantic, plus we can have a day where we make them together. I love her so much anons
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That's a lovely idea! I've always wanted to do the same thing.
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A lesbian march is taking place in Paris today. Guess who was chosen to represent it? A Muslim and a man.
Everything is fine ! Crazy how we're going backward.
What a joke.
How many out and proud hijabi lesbian muslims are there btw? Considering the entire religion is based on not saying no to men.
Nonna, I think you've really just had terrible luck. I absolutely can't stand men, not their smell, or their voices, let alone the way they look (or act kek.) I'm not really into femmes either, I just can't stand men and want absolutely nothing to do with them, I don't talk to them and I don't go into their spaces.
I'm with a longterm gf and she feels the exact same way and has since she was very young. Please believe me when I say you've just had very bad luck with women. Rough women or soft women, I would prefer ANY woman over a scrote and I think any lesbian would tell you the same.
I kind of think this is a view every woman has had in teenage years/ early 20s. And then as you slowly learn to love, trust and be proud of yourself that societal pressure to look up to men and think they're always "right" goes away. Reading pink pill etc also can help not feel below men.
And some lesbians (especially young ones) like to really adhere to the butch/femme (top/bottom)dynamic. So you might feel you have to put yourself in these boxes or else. Not all lesbians are like that and would like you however you are as long as you are the genuine you.
I can sort of relate. I made the mistake of sleeping with several straight bicurious women in the past and they of course all went back to men. I've only had one real girlfriend who didn't go back to men and actually turned out to be a lesbian too. Of course you're never going to be good enough for a straight woman or a Kinsey 1-2 bisexual. Even a hook up hurts when they go back to men afterwards and I started to question myself, wondering if I did anything against their consent, since they weren't really into women apparently. Other times I stopped an encounter before it even got that far, because I noticed that she's probably just straight and wanting to ~experiment~. Right after that one of my best friends decided to transition and tried to encourage me to transition too, which caused me to cut contact. Now I'm mainly angry that scrotes have it so easy and they still fuck it up. Women put them on a pedestal and will go above and beyond for them, but even washing their own ass and doing nice things for women is too much to ask. They can't give women orgasms, but it doesn't matter, even when they don't know how to use their equipment and think oral is icky, most women just prefer them anyway. Even most bisexual women do, because they're brainwashed through female socialization and there's less societal backlash when dating men. My ex is the only other lesbian I have ever met irl and I still have difficulty believing other lesbians exist due to the isolation. Going to events doesn't help much either, because you just find AGP's, straight Aidens and 'asexuals' who love talking about BDSM for some reason. What helped me were books like the Well of Loneliness, because it helps to know this is a tale as old as time and it's not just me. It doesn't change that I'm practically a (partially voluntary) femcel, but it's something.
Absolutely, I've definitely developed a fear of dating over it. It sucks to put yourself in a vulnerable position being emotionally involved with a woman when there's a chance she dumps me immediately for a Nigel. I don't have anything against dating bisexuals per se but with them you know there's a 90% chance of them treating you as a temporary solution until they find a moid to marry. I'm still haunted by the girl who said "If you were a man I'd date you" to my face years ago and it triggered
my then tranny period.
>Groomed by male dominated culture or not, it seems like women tend to crave roughness and I’m just super full of estrogen.
No, I think they do
sincerely want to date you and other women but it's made too hard to stay in a same-sex relationship when thinking about the logistics of having children and dealing with homophobia around you. Some of the women pick the worst fucking low value males ever just because they want to be accepted in society's eyes.
discord is for peasants, queens use the bathroom wall. >>258592
she sounds like a very lucky lady
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>>258525>does anyone else feel kind of inferior to men?
I don't think men are superior. However I always wanted to be a guy. I remember being 5 and wearing suits in my room imagining I was a gentleman. 20 years later I still daydream about being a man.
But I know I will never be a man. So I prefer to look feminine.
Yes, and it has the stench of black and white teenage polilez bullshit. I don't have the need to cape for gay men but I don't have the need to really hate them either because I've sometimes found more solidarity with them than with straight women for example. Sure there are catty misogynistic gay men but just as much there are plenty of lesbians who aggressively cape for AGPs and LChat staceys who have a solid hate boner for any GNC woman. To me straight/bi men are the worst option but putting gay men in the same category is being dishonest in my eyes. Despite everything they don't have the same incentive to abuse and oppress women as female-attracted men do.
>especially as i feel like lesbians get viewed as being “on thin ice” just by association.
Ditto. It's obvious that those anons have it out for lesbians as well and consistently try to throw sly spergfits about them, but instead of claiming them as pedo degenerates they always try to force that "why are mean goldstars always bullying me, a bihet" infight even in this thread or bitch about "ugly manlike yaoibrained pornsick TIFs" when talking about tragic butches who were pressured into transitioning. Not to mention how they clearly hate troons for their association with homosexuality, not because they're psychos appropriating LGB and female spaces.
To be perfectly honest it's why I've lost more and more interest on this site. It's exhausting when the topic seems to come up more and more and you know no matter how nonchalant they try to be about it you know there's unironic homophobia hidden behind it.
also i forgot to mention but she told me if she knew my parents didn’t approve of her she wouldn’t have stayed with my family in the first place. i could tell that talking to me was making her annoyed so i didn’t press this but i think if she hadn’t have met them it would have completely soured their opinion of her possibly beyond repair.
i just don’t know if telling her that what she’s experiencing now is what i’ve experienced since we first started dating. i know and have come to peace with the fact that her family will never approve of me as a partner to their daughter and i’ve extended her that grace but it’s like she can’t do the same for my family.
i don’t know. i guess i will give her space and try not to be too much of a nervous wreck
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I'm not sure what's the "fuck up" here, but I see you're feeling bad about your situation and it's very hard for you. I feel like I'm getting two storylines here.
First one is that your gf is hurt that you haven't told your family about you two moving together, and that you didn't tell her about the hurtful comments your family has made about her. When it comes to the family comment, I think all you can do is say sorry and maybe reflect on why you feel responsible for managing others' feelings (I assume you didn't tell her to spare her from feeling bad). (I realize you said she doesn't want you to apologize - it's not unreasonable to ask her what other action you could take for her to feel heard, understood and feel better). I think this moment is not the time for you to defend your decisions. Yes, you may have perfectly rational explanations which you feel should make her understand - and they could make her understand, but what they won't do is undo her being hurt. Just be there for her and validate her feelings (it's ok she feels one way - and it's also ok you feel differently), and try not to take it personally. It doesn't (or shouldn't) mean that she thinks you're a bad person or a bad girlfriend. However, I hear that she set a boundary with you: she doesn't want to talk to you until you see each other in person. This sounds like a boundary that is hard for you to accept, and honestly, you should be open with her how that makes you feel, without being accusatory, and what would you prefer. Maybe not talk about the conflict yet, but still be in contact?
The second storyline are your grievances with your girlfriend. I'm hearing that you sacrificed a lot for her by coming out, and that you're disappointed her family is not accepting of you. These are very valid
feelings and are very much worth discussing, but maybe at a different time, when you two aren't both in high arousal state, maybe even trying to "one up" the other in terms of being hurt. When people argue, I think it's important to keep in mind a singular issue, otherwise the argument gets confusing and messy easily.
Basically what I'm trying to say is: most conflicts are not about the specific things that happened but more about the feelings and thoughts that they trigger
. When it comes to conflict, I like to try and use non-violent communication skills. It can be hard sometimes but also so rewarding, especially in a relationship (both person must be willing to try to use these skills though, and not fall into fallacies).
I believe you two can get past this situation, and that you can stay true to yourself while listening to the other person. Best of luck, anon.
thank you for this well worded response. i couldn’t sleep without getting this somewhat sorted so i sent her a message and then we had a chat about this. we’ve dated for long enough that i know she likes to do this when she’s mad - go radio silent until she feels better. that’s really hard for me to do so i’m glad she went against her own preferences to talk to me.
i do realise that a lot of what i initially posted about was me making excuses and venting so i really tried hard to listen to what she wanted to say.
as it turns out she was planning on proposing to me as soon as i arrived in her city and my more flippant comments made her think i wasn’t committed to her or something. in hindsight it seems so obvious but i honestly am still in disbelief that she loves me that much. i think it was this insecurity in myself that made me reject even hoping we’d take the next step in our relationship.
anyway i’ll spare you the details but we talked for a while and got things straightened out (lol) so to speak and i think we’re better now. it’s now nearly 4am and i think i can sleep soundly.
Why do we try to shut up other lesbians whenever their posts include mention of how other gays can feed into a negative view of gays in general and come back to hurt us too. Health, stigmas, social overlaps. Things that we are affected by. That's usually still relevant to the thread tbh. Being a lesbian doesn't mean pretending that men don't exist.
There's a difference between say bicurious anons shitting up the thread with 'omg I think I like a man all of a sudden, lets discuss' and what you're so upset by here. I mean anons often act like this is the relationship advice thread (which it's not) but nobody complains, we're chill.. no nitpicking.. General talk about gay community stuff though is considered a no go? How does that make sense?
Yep and yep. It's been happening for a little while now, which is really fucking annoying, and there's been a weird conservative bend happening at the same time. The two don't have to be related, but both viewpoints embolden the other to appear. So we get people shitting on gay moids and ftms for the completely wrong reasons under the guise of 'based troon/manhate.'
I only keep tabs on a few threads here anymore, because the blatant baiting/astroturfing that gets genuine responses and support is lame as hell.
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Now that we've established that Sam and Cat were a lesbian couple, which of the pair do you see yourself as in a relationship?
Yeah, men make up 50% of the world population and a lot of us have to deal with them on a daily basis and seeing how the lesbian experience of an interaction with a man is very different from a straight woman's it's appropriate to talk about it. I can't talk to my straight Nigeltending female friends about how I see men and their presence and have them understand me. Even my girlfriend is bi so she doesn't fully "get" me.>>259169
I wonder why it's happening tbh, sometimes it sounds like a purebred scrote or an edgy cool girl and sometimes it sounds like those domineering twitter sapphics who pretend to love women while crying into their pillow for never being able to marry Jungkook. Either way I don't trust them at all when they say they're "okay with lesbians", especially how often their masks slip off.
I once tried explaining the predatory lesbian issue to my friends who were lesbian, straight and bisexual respectively and only the lesbian understood what I meant. The straight and bisexual women didn't get it at all, they sincerely assumed that women could just compliment and touch each other all they wanted and never be considered rapey because that's the reality for them, not for lesbians. They didn't have to deal with being considered a rapist for existing in the same locker room growing up.
The same goes for the appeal of trooning out for GNC homosexuals, only gay people seem to fully understand the mechanics behind it. While I will always unconditionally defend women's rights and feel physically safer with a woman than a man, I still don't fully trust straight women when it comes to LGB issues. The people I see caping for trannies the most are heterosexuals, both men and women, because they don't have to deal with the full consequences.
Anyone struggle with what you're attracted to vs what traits you want for yourself? It's stupid because I know
you don't have to have a different dynamic for a relationship but I find the differences kinda cute. Like I find muscles and tomboy aesthetic hot but I am also into working out so would it be weird to find a gf like this as well? >>259383
You don't have fit in all her clothes nonie, if you want you two could share a couple of pieces like oversized jackets or jewelry.
It wouldn't be, I just think it would be nice to admire something I don't have (or vice versa) Kinda like height differences, I don't care too
much about it but it would be cute to be held by someone taller than me and she liked me for being shorter if that makes sense
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It's not looking good. Can someone please help me on the ethics of this? I honestly don't want to die without ever having sex again, but I don't think it's fair to put another woman through that. Even if it's a one night stand, I can imagine it's still fucked up if your temporary bed partner dies not super long after. Unless they are a tourist I guess and have no way of finding out. I don't even know how I'm going to attract anyone, I lost so much weight and muscle, I look like a ghost with a slightly yellow tinge. I'm honestly even considering contacting the lesbian escort agency, I hate that my brain even went over that as an option, but what if I don't even get to have a PCHP? I keep getting more bad news after doctors say "oh it probably won't be that bad".
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I hope you make it nona. Don't leave us.
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I started to follow a smaller celebrity on social media and find her irresistibly pretty and she have a shy/akward charm and personality but is not a doormat. She very rarely post stuff or interact with fans, but commission art sometime. I was thinking about doing a drawing of her for her birthday but it's super cringe right ?
She is like the only celebrity crush I ever had who is active now and not 30+ years ago.
sage for shit blogposting
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>>260277>She's an ultrafemme, lowkey disgusted by butches and GNC lesbians and doesn't know how to keep her fucking mouth shut about it, thinks she's oppressed for "not looking like a lesbian"
I hate this oh my god. Fucking where? Where is this magical land where society respects butch lesbians more than conventionally feminine women? Where is this secret lesbian island where butches get all the positive media representation and femmes are reduced to punchlines? Is that where all the butches are hiding? Is that why I can't find any non-trans butch women on dating apps? Are they all living on the secret butch supremacy island?
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I'm trying to see how quickly I can get myself banned from Lex because that app isn't even good for shitposting. It's all deranged troons, slightly less deranged ftms, and really young she/theys who would probably be disgusted by actual sex with a woman, and almost everybody is overweight and/or fugly. My profile is blatantly TERFy without actually using the word and I still get random trannies like picrel messaging me. Maybe if I succeed here I will move on to trolling on Her but I don't want some creepy troon dev to hold onto my IP and account details.
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>>260277>She's an ultrafemme, lowkey disgusted by butches and GNC lesbians and doesn't know how to keep her fucking mouth shut about it, thinks she's oppressed for "not looking like a lesbian"
Oh god. I can't express how much i hate those kind of woman
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Realistically I have a great shot due to my age and prior fitness level, but I'm just scared shitless either way due to how much I've deteriorated in just a couple months and how much seems to be affected.>>260277>She's an ultrafemme, lowkey disgusted by butches and GNC lesbians and doesn't know how to keep her fucking mouth shut about it, thinks she's oppressed for "not looking like a lesbian">"I would date a trans woman no problem because trans women are women!"
What the actual fuck.>>260369
Oh god the Lword did butches so dirty. All we got was a troon who ended up sleeping with a man and Ivan who ended up being poly and trying to get with straight women. Shane barely even counts as some form of masc and they did her dirty too. People who complain about butches, are living in the past, which they weren't even a part of. The 40's/50's were a weird time from what I've read and femme4femme was rare in working class communities for a while, but that hasn't been the case since the 70's at the very least. Ruby Rose as Stella in OINTB was thrown out real fast, the other butch Dominga "Daddy" Duarte literally went to prison for being a pimp and getting one of the women killed after pressuring her into it. She also got other women in prison on drugs. Which is worse than whatever most of the other women in prison did. Let's also not talk about Big Boo and what they made her do with the dog and why Lea Delaria has some weird hatred of other butches (idk if she's even actually butch). They consistently do butches dirty.
Not about to dox myself but I more or less wrote "I hate men". Considering just nuking the whole venture by making a post about JKR for the lulz.>>260400
Your guess is as good as mine. I think he means he's going to attempt some sort of fertility ritual on a chaser he's been talking to but who even knows.
Butch is a lesbian identity or description and refers to a (considered by general society) masculine manner of dress and behaviour. It's more than just an aesthetic or 'look'. This shouldn't be misinterpreted as "butches have to act like scrotes", which isn't the case, but a femme with short hair is a femme with short hair, not suddenly butch. I don't know how "dyke" describes a look? Tomboy can refer to women of any sexuality, usually children, implies that it's something you grow out of, usually not seen as masculine as "butch". Often used by people who believe that "butch" is a dirty word and they think it refers to fat ugly women who don't know how to dress well; it feels like a cowardly copout. People who call everyone who wears a suit or has short hair "butch" are retarded too and should stfu, because that's not how it works.>>260565
Stud refers to black butches specifically, it doesn't mean "classy butches". Butches can be classy too.
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>>260538>Oh god the Lword did butches so dirty.
Have you seen any of the reboot yet? They made Shane fall in love with an AGP. Finley is cute though so I'm still watching.
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Pride month is one month away. Have you anons prepared your nuclear bunkers yet?
Shane fell super hard unfortunately. They also added one true butch to the series but she's old and annoying and kind of an idiot. The L Word only "improved" in terms of shoving even more trannies into storylines.>>260634
You need to work on trust first. Don't set up expectations of sex (or later, orgasm) from touches and just focus on going as far as you can handle. Talk to each other, a lot. She will need reassurance and feel bad for it, so will you. But looking in her eyes you'll find reassuring her comes easy, and she will feel the same. Imo stop escalating as soon as one of you starts getting in her head and learn to communicate that effectively. Sometimes you will misread or fail to speak up but you need to be patient and focus on feeling safe. Just support each other and slowly explore intimate interactions that feel good and safe. Trust comes first, there is no special technique that will make sex easy.
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lex has banned my burner accounts 20+ times. i dont care. i spammed their servers w accounts and set location to coordinate in antartica.
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They made her go from Quiara to an AGP? While I hate that Quiara constantly pressured Shane into having kids together, when it's been clear Shane is extremely terrified of that, at least she was an actual woman and quite hot.
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The writing was on the wall already tbh from the beginning (gif related), but I hate they went that route anyway. I think Ilene Chaiken hates any kind of gnc or slightly masc lesbian and has made it her lifegoal to give the shittiest representation ever.>>261290
I'm sorry for reminding you, kek. Thank you! I had another test procedure done today, they've taken some biopsies and the waiting game is starting again. I think they want to do a Whipple procedure, but are still looking at how much to remove. I hoped to get away with a simple resection, but of course not kek
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Also I'm glad the person you're caring for is doing better now! She's lucky to have someone like you caring for her and I hope things get only better!
, you are right. Do you listen to any podcasts from non handmaiden lesbians? Any nonas have any suggestions?
Got it from my grandma, it's a cheaper 80's office lady ensemble but this time I had to swap out the skirt for a custom made formal pant (no ready to wear pant will ever fit me well). Honestly I'm lucky because the vest stop at my waist, and the jacket is curvy enought for my hips. Honestly a 3 piece suit off the rack can't really work for any woman who is not build like a runaway model. Appart from this jacket, the only that fit me is one I did with a custom pattern.>>261474
True! There really need to be some kind of revival in butch fashion that is not just man sportwear or skater boy stuff thrown on a woman.
I wouldn’t worry about it. Online dating if full of tims, gender specials and handmaidens anyway. Oh and spicy straights looking for threesomes>>261684
i feel you. i want a gnc terf
gf to be cat mum with.
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How do you deal with family member's passing by homophobia? Not even always directed towards you. My mom is generally an accepting person (I'm not really out to her but hinted at it and suspect she knows) but every so often will make jokes or remarks about lesbians and it kind of stings every time. Like she's pretty traditional so when she saw Jojo siwa dancing with another woman on Dancing with the Stars and said she thought it was 'unnatural' for the competition because all the other contestants were man/woman. She also believes strongly that kids should have a mother and father, not two mothers or fathers and doesn't think they could be raised right. I've never told her that if I ever wanted kids it'd be with another woman, it somehow makes me feel like I'd be an incompetent parent if I ever did want kids one day. I have other family members make fun of lesbians' sex preferences which always makes me wince like heterosexuals don't do disgusting things too?? Idk I just feel embarrassed everytime it's brought up like I'm the butt of the joke
i used to think i wouldn’t invite them to my wedding but i’m just going to elope lmao
i moved away from my family and only keep in touch by calls. i never share more than i need to.
What color do you want to dye it? Unless you get it cut weird most normies won't suspect you're trying to be gendery, a lot of straight girls I see have colorfully dyed hair nowadays.
I think makeup and clothes affect this though, I wore and oversized jacket and colored lipstick together once and someone had to confirm my pronouns were female kms
ayrt. like a slicked back mohawk? sides are shaved in tight. and the kicker is my fav colours are green, blue (the danger hair colours) or purple.
I’m so ducking angry for you nonna. how is it lesbians have been gnc for literal centuries but it’s only of note when it’s done by non-binary/tif kids. If i wear green lipstick i don't want to be they/them’ed. I want to look like Jolyne Jostar.
god it was green lipstick. I don't want to hate the color now either because I [thought]
it looked cool
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We need more lesbos
There's nothing wrong with single moms. I've seen masculine guys who were closeted from both their parents. Men act hyper-masculine to hide their desires away, these are the same men who compare dick sizes and talk about them more than us, and they decide to talk shit about us. Pakistan where being gay is haram, they watch alot of gay porn. this triggers
me. Men place women in different hierarchies when we do more or equal
I'm embarrassed of my nickname now because I worry it makes me look like a gendie but I also haven't gone by my birth name in five years kek. Just do it anon, people will always make assumptions about you. And you're right, >>262186
lesbians have always been gnc. We're the blueprint, they're copying us.
So don't let them take your self expression just because you're embarrassed you might be associated with them. We do it better lol
Internalized lesbophobia and somewhat explicit What is the actual difference between attraction and objectification? How many women are you allowed to be attracted to before it gets gross and a cliché? Is it bad to not have a type, but have very broad interest, from high femme to even SOME TiFs, various bodytypes? Is it objectification and degrading if you want to go down on a woman, but wouldn't want them to go down on you (I'm not completely touch-me-not, just a weird hangup)? I don't want to transition, but I also don't want to perform femininity because it makes me feel like an AGP and look like one (imo). Dressing gnc makes me feel like I actually look like a woman, because the contrast brings out my feminine features. Meanwhile if I do anything feminine, I feel like my ogre bonestructure comes right out. Same thing with short hair, I actually think my face looks more feminine and soft with short hair and less harsh and sharp than with long hair. Is not wanting to perform femininity internalized misogyny? I feel like a gross hypersexual scrote who is just larping as a feminist. How can I shit on scrotes, when I'm basically seen as scrotelite anyway and I have a very high libido? I never use misogynist cuss words iirc, I don't comment on women's bodies irl or even online really, except something vague like "oh she's beautiful". I would never talk about "owning" someone and I'm not a jealous type afaik. I don't watch porn, I've never been interested in actual porn, there's enough mainstream media which is already borderline softcore. I'd be fine with a completely monogamous exclusive relationship, but I think my sex drive is too high for that and it would've been better if I were asexual, because who the fuck would want a gross horny simp around all the time? If I were actually attractive, I would totally want to be some sort of stripper for women exclusively or even an escort (I saw something about a lesbian escort bureau on the news) and I feel like a scrote over it. I wish I could nuke my libido and become asexual. I almost feel like the polilez are right and it's better to be a cottagecore asexual, because it's hard to marry feminism and my scroteishness.
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>>262343>because it's hard to marry feminism and my scroteishness.
Maybe you need to step back from feminism a bit? I read your whole vent and I've had most of those feelings too. When I spend too much time thinking about radical feminism (and especially if I'm participating in radfem communities full of straight women) I end up with this weird OCD about my sexuality where I obsess over rooting out the 'problematic
' parts. It's not healthy.
I don't think you sound like a scrote at all. I think you sound like a normal lesbian. Thought crime isn't actually a thing you know? You're never going to be scrotelike just for being attracted to women. Men are disgusting because they turn their thoughts into shitty IRL behavior like leering and harassing. And then patriarchy enables that shitty IRL behavior and makes it worse. It's not even comparable to you like, seeing a woman and privately wishing you could go down on her.
I'm so sorry you feel this way. I wish I could type more but I'm stoned and barely functional, I just wanted to make sure someone replied. I wish I could give you a hug.
I think I've internalized it on top of the religious conservative and TRA stuff. I had supposed other lesbians in radfem spaces send me links to polilez articles, it all honestly sounds very similar and has blended together. I've left all radfem online communities quite a while ago and I try to avoid general lesbian communities too, because that is either filled with TRA's or more conservative types who think butches
give lesbians a bad name and should transition
already. I feel like because of the gnc/butch
thing I have a bigger responsibility to root out the problematic
parts, because we have such a bad reputation already
. So now every time I realize I feel attracted to a woman, my mind immediately goes down the list of how I'm a fucked up gross predatory monster and I probably traumatized her with my presence, I'm being a bit hyperbolic, but it does feel that way. I know realistically speaking thought crime isn't a thing, but I remember that back in the day there was discourse about how it feels like thought rape if someone does have private thoughts like that and that it's fucked up and objectifying either way. What even is the difference between leering, staring and just looking? I try to glue my eyes to the floor or ceiling, but then I catch myself looking anyway and sometimes I think I do stare because I'm trying to get my gaydar to work and wonder whether it's just a straight woman with a spicy haircut or maybe a lesbian too. Sometimes I've complimented other women on their arms or hair and maybe that's harassment? I usually try to get away as soon as possible afterwards I probably look like a tard running away
so I don't make anyone uncomfortable, but maybe it feels threatening and predatory anyway when it comes from someone like me. Your stoned thoughts were very coherent and I do appreciate you taking the time to type all of that out. Thank you.
I never wanted to transition really. When a fujo ex-friend transitioned when we were teenagers, I reacted really extreme to it, so it's never been an option to me. Though it doesn't matter, because people have always compared me to men anyway and everyone from christians to TRA's think I should've been a man, conservative lesbians would prefer if I'd transition, so I wouldn't give the community a bad name and add to the stereotype of the "mannish" lesbian
. I don't necessarily take all of society's bigger problems on myself, but I'm worried that my existence makes other women uncomfortable and that's the last thing I would want. I've not really met another lesbian since my ex (and I dumped her to save her from my horrible monstrous predatory ass, but she turned out to actually be into women), even when going to progressive spaces. Actual bi women seem rare too. This is going to sound insane, but it makes me sometimes doubt whether others even exist. I see it online, there are some tv shows and movies, a book here and there, women on dating apps who only want to chat, but irl there's nobody.
Straight women seem so unbothered, they hug each other, give each other compliments, stare at each other all they want and it's fine. Meanwhile I haven't shared changingrooms with other women since late primary school. The mind might be a lonely place, but irl is not much different in my experience. I'm not even sure whether those "other people" exist. I've come across gay men in passing, but never chatted for longer than 15 minutes. The guy who I knew for a decade and who I thought was gay, ended up being bi, so I'm completely ignorant.
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This is such a retarded question but would this still be considered somewhat femme or just tomboyish?
>>262343>Is not wanting to perform femininity internalized misogyny?
Even if a fear of femininity in presentation does come from a place of internalized misogyny, I think a lot of women are simply afraid of experiencing misogyny from other people because of the way they look, which imo makes it completely fine to want to avoid it. Feminists before us fought for the right for women to have more freefom over their bodies, clothes included. Also, if anything, I think being gnc is very beautiful and admirable. I'm very femme myself and sometimes I do wonder if I dress how I do because I've been brainwashed by society, and I admire women who don't try to fit into that mold and just do what looks best to them.>I don't watch porn, I've never been interested in actual pornI actually did/do suffer from porn addiction and it really just worsens everything. I've always loved and admired other women and their bodies and absolutely hate even getting compliments from men, but it makes me feel just as bad as any man when I would objectify porn actresses or just fantasize about having consensual vanilla sex with other women. I hate being objectified myself but I also am terrified of objectifying other women even though I don't think my own thoughts would be disgusting if another woman thought of me that way. It's just an all around upsetting and confusing experience sometimes, but there are definitely other lesbians who have high libidos, I hope you can find someone who would be happy to be with you.
Samefagging to add, not wanting to perform femininity is not misogynistic. The imposed restrictions and standards of femininity as dictated by men is what's misogynistic, and wanting to exist as your natural self in comfortable clothes with an easy to maintain haircut is definitely not misogynistic in the least. If some women want to perform femininity, that's fine, but femininity is not synonymous with womanhood, it is something that's expected
Anon, I recognize a lot of myself in what you're saying and I can tell you carry a lot of guilt and shame. Please trust your heart and body. None of what you're describing is wrong, it's only homophobes that have a problem with what you're saying. Being able to self describe this as internalized lesbophobia is the first step towards healing. There's nothing wrong with you at all.
Fuck, sorry, samefagging one last time.
I am also a horny simp. I have a wife who I love and I could cum just from eating her out. When we first got together we were having sex like three times a day. I am foolishly over the top in love with her, and before we met I also had thoughts of wanting to strip for women, serve them, be used by them. Now that I'm in a stable, loving relationship I no longer feel like a desperate horny little freak because I've learned that mutual attraction actually exists and it's not just me acting like an incel. We've both had past sexual trauma that can make things hard for us but we're understanding of each other and we make each other feel safe.
Other lesbians exist and they're horny for you as well, I promise it's a fact. It's going to get better. Please don't be afraid to put yourself out there because I guarantee you will feel so much better meeting other women like you. Nothing has helped me like finding community with proud, established, gnc lesbians. Just keep looking until you find them, whether online or irl.
>>262485>>262486>Radfem lesbians are great>radfem lesbians are good for the soul
Nona, all I've gotten from radfem "lesbians" are polilez articles and constant shaming. There's an approved gnc uniform, but anything more gnc or overtly masculine than just being lazy, is seen as male aligned. You're also still expected to perform some femininity to fit the uniform and there is a list of approved behaviors that comes with the uniform. Handing a tissue to a femme or opening the door? You're upholding heteropatriarchy, infantilizing her and oppressing yourself! Getting sent Bev Jo articles and podcasts, where she talks about how anyone can choose to become a "Lesbian" and having her kiss Terri Strange's ass. You can have a sex drive, maybe once a month, but you HAVE to let other women go down on you
or you're basically a trans man
already! If you're attracted to overt femmes? You're practically a scrote, that's male gazey, go think about what you've done! Attracted to TiF's? Straight to the gulag with you! You can only find other enlightened radfem "Lesbians", woman-identified-women attractive and whether it's a butch or a femme, they uphold heteropatriarchy and aren't true woman-identified-women. Also if you're not an open terf
everywhere, you're not even a true "Lesbian" don't you know?! Nah I don't think I can be around radfem "Lesbians" (you have to capitalize the l don't you know? To signify how you're better and different from those "lifelongs" who didn't CHOOSE to be a Lesbian!!). They even tried to pressure my bi friend into identifying as a lesbian, because if you know you're bi, you must be a disgusting slut who is open to men, you have to call yourself a lesbian to signify you're not open to men! Can't just call yourself febfem! I swear straight radfems are more sane than them and any actual non-polilez lesbians run away very fast and don't last long in such an environment.>>262487>Please don't be afraid to put yourself out there because I guarantee you will feel so much better meeting other women like you.
Well radfem Lesbians aren't like me, because I didn't choose any of this and I don't want even more pressure to hyperanalyze everything I do. I'm glad you found happiness and all that, but those radfem communities are a minefield. I'll have to look in other places which aren't explicitly radfem.>>262484>and sometimes I do wonder if I dress how I do because I've been brainwashed by society
Humans have been painting their faces and decorating themselves since the very beginning. I think even if we were on a planet with just women or with no patriarchy or whatever, you'd still have women who would dress in what we consider now feminine. Crows like shiny things, humans can like shiny things too and put it on themselves. I hope you'll recover and will no longer feel shame from it. I lucked out, but it's difficult to avoid porn in today's society™ and even mainstream media seems to be full of borderline softcore stuff.
it's not your fault!>I hope you can find someone who would be happy to be with you.I feel like I'm too late, I don't know how long I have left, whether I can even recover and I'm probably spending the rest of my 20's in treatment and what if I need chemo and it'll wreck me even more? I'm already not very attractive, have low confidence and a femcel attitude, so I've kinda resigned myself to the fact that I'm probably going to stay alone. I don't even want to go on dating apps anymore, I'm gross skinnyfat and look like a junkie teenage boy since I lost weight, full of bruises and a sickly skintone. I feel guilty anyway for not having my priorities straight. Why is this the thing that bothers me when there's so much other shit about life I'll be missing out on? It makes me wonder if I deserved this, for being this messed up. Like karma for being a coomer.
What you wrote about radfem "lesbians" is so spot on. I actually came out feeling worse
about my sexuality after spending a few months on the radfem scene. I remember talking about extravagant fashion purchases with one woman and I mentioned getting expensive designer boxers as a treat and she flipped the fuck out on me telling me I'm gonna troon out and I'm a misogynist for preferring male styles of underwear. Absolutely batshit insane and that's the tip of the iceberg for the mad shit I heard from these women. I agree with a great deal of their politics but you could not pay me to hang out with radfems again. I don't even want to label myself a radfem or radfem adjacent, lest I attract more polilez freaks.
Finding radfems who larp as lesbians is easier than finding actual lesbians somehow. I even went to a party in a progressive area a couple months ago and the only technically lesbian women I saw, were TiFs with a beard and everything. Every androgynous woman I came across was a straight Aiden and thought I was one too for just being a babyface butch. The only person I came across who was actually into women, claimed to be asexual, while also talking about going down on women and playing choking games with her friends. Though I don't know if she meant an actual woman or an AGP, because she was sitting next to one. I feel so fucking out of touch, they were older than me, practically millennials, but they were acting more like zoomers than me the zoomer. I feel like a fucking boomer in comparison. A gay guy took pity on me and was the only one who actually recognized me as a normal butch woman. I think I maybe saw one butch4butch couple leave early on from the corner of my eye. Why is it so fucking difficult to find other lesbians? They're not with the radfems, not with the queer TRA's, I feel like everyone is already coupled up and hiding in their bunker in pure bliss.>>262678
They also freak out if you want to read about lesbian history, because they are deadset on the narrative that true lesbians didn't exist before them and that they invented being gnc. Sharing fucked up articles with a religious undertone some polilez writers were theologians, there's a reason polilez lesbophobia is similar to what religious nutjobs preach
is fine, but please don't read about female masculinity or lesbian history, because that is icky!! Their politics are fine on the surface, but for some reason they want to control the tiniest details because of the "personal is political" thing, everything is under a catholic-guilt-like scrutiny. It's how you just know they're not really lesbians, because if they were, they'd know that we are already hard enough on ourselves and don't need even more of that shit, we already got enough shit from religious conservatives and all sorts of lesbophobes screeching about how we're wannabe men over a clothing item.
I'm sorry my suggestion wasn't helpful anon, I didn't mean to bring back any bad memories for you. I've never had this experience before honestly, the radfem lesbians and bi women I know are really nice understanding people and are strongly critical of the type of behavior you describe. Maybe I was wrong to suggest seeking out a certain group, I more meant to look for other women who are proud of their sexuality, who value and center other women and their autonomy. I hope things get better for you. We don't deserve the harsh scrutiny we receive.>>262754>>262833
I'd never heard of them before this thread, is this like a new tier of separatism? "Choosing" to be a lesbian because you hate men? Why not just be celibate, I don't understand this.>>262733
I hate that sexuality is tied to political identity, ffs. I don't like associating with the lgb community sometimes because it's so tied to other politics. I get that it had to be in order to have like marriage rights and to not be killed in the streets, but making it revolve around every othe aspect of your life is crazy.
I live my life in the closet mainly because of this and never bring up my sexuality unless its relevant because I don't view it as my whole personality, literally just as who I want my partner to be.
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Sheila Jeffreys, Julie Bindel, Andrea Dworkin, Mary Daly etc. are political lesbians. >Political lesbianism originated in the late 1960s among second wave radical feminists as a way to fight sexism and compulsory heterosexuality. Sheila Jeffreys helped to develop the concept when she co-wrote in 1981 "Love Your Enemy? The Debate Between Heterosexual Feminism and Political Lesbianism" with the Leeds Revolutionary Feminist Group. They argued that women should abandon support of heterosexuality and stop sleeping with men, while encouraging women to rid men "from your beds and your heads". While the main idea of political lesbianism is to be separate from men, this does not necessarily mean that political lesbians have to sleep with women; some choose to be celibate or identify as asexual. The Leeds Revolutionary Feminist Group definition of a political lesbian is "a woman identified woman who does not fuck men". They proclaimed men the enemy and women who were in relationships with them collaborators and complicit in their own oppression. Heterosexual behavior is seen as the basic unit of the patriarchy's political structure, lesbians who reject heterosexual behavior therefore disrupt the established political system.
Many of them never slept with women or even dated women, but still claimed to be lesbians, like Dworkin (love a lot of her writings, but she was a polilez). The ideal lesbian to them doesn't sleep with women, but just has a friendship and does some handholding once a month. It's also btw why Julie Bindel tried to convince JK Rowling during that lunch that she could choose to be a lesbian. That sadly enough wasn't a joke. It's not a "new" tier of separatism, is the original kind. "Lesbian feminist" is generally code for polilez and "Lesbian feminist" theory is ironically enough vehemently lesbophobic. A lot of radfem "lesbians" aren't actually lesbians, but people don't notice that when they just reblog memes and some fun quotes, but never read where those came from. Picrel some online polilez retardation, sorry for the shitty collage.>>262833
A polilez as a partner sounds like actual hell, being constantly shamed for your sexuality and actually being attracted to your partner.
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Yeah she did claim she's a lesbian and she also sperged out at a lesbian conference for actual lesbians, called them nazi's for not accepting her as a lesbian iirc
Awful, I hate seeing this. Thank you for the write up and collage, and taking the time to explain this to me. I had no idea this was going on. Blogging a little but it's been very difficult to come out of an extremely sheltered Christian upbringing (literally was not allowed to go to school) and land in the laps of various groups who don't have my best interests in mind, and then find out there's even more layers of this shittiness. Every day it feels like there's a new way to deny that same sex attraction exists and is unchangeable and degrade people for it.
I'm very disappointed to hear this about Dworkin in particular. I started reading her work recently, she was saying a lot of what I was feeling and that was comforting. I still think what she had to say has value, but still. Very disappointing. Again, why can't they just call themselves celibate or asexual?
AYRT, yeah same with the sheltered upbringing. I went to a school where parents had to sign a declaration promising that their kids aren't gay kek. Everywhere I turn I run into a wall of lesbophobia. A lot of Dworkin's work is still good and valuable though, don't have to throw everything in the trash. Just a thing to keep in mind. Some of the other writers I mentioned though, really did only write polilez bs and nothing useful. Polilez feel like they are the true lesbians and "lifelong born this ways" still uphold patriarchy, so aren't true lesbians in their opinion, which is why they won't drop the act and just say they're celibate.>>262893
It's not embarrassing to not have dated yet, I feel like it's common when you're SSA that it can take quite a while. I've had one relationship in my teens and I feel just as inexperienced as ever. Idk if lesbian bars and clubs even still have actual lesbians or any women who are actually attracted to women. So you might not be missing much. You could try dating apps, but I've not had much luck with that either. I might just be ugly and uninteresting kek, but many just want to chat and never meet up.
I was afraid of the same thing but was pleasantly surprised to see that the main character explicitly calls herself a lesbian several times. While there is queer/gender bs, it's not too bad one character is a T-voiced themlet and the ex of one of the love interests, but she's just a side character. There isn't much other than that
. I wasn't a big fan of the movie however. Most of the jokes didn't land. The plot is kinda meh. It has weird pacing, it starts off slow then shit happens too fast at the end, which I guess is typical of a romcom. There's also a weird focus on a very PDA straight couple who are the MC's best friends and they're constantly shown fully making out. It was really jarring and kinda nasty imo.
It's cute and watchable enough for a romcom, but you shouldn't expect much from it
>>262754>I feel like everyone is already coupled up and hiding in their bunker in pure bliss.
That's literally every actually non-trooned out lesbian that I know personally. They're with their long-term girlfriend away from everyone else, never wanting to interact with any other gay person outside of their bubble because why the fuck would you in this time and age of kweer brainrot. >>262866>>262833>>262886
Hundred percent agreed on all of these posts, polilezzies can go fuck themselves. They only muddy the waters and make it miserable for all genuine lesbians. The amount of bitter hatred they have for specifically butch lesbians and depressed Aidens is both heartbreaking and enraging. >>263168
I doubt they ever said they were lesbian, most of them are just heterosexuals who claim to be "fine with female homosexuals" only because it's easier for them to dismiss and ignore due to like you described, lesbians not being taken seriously by anyone. One of them even has had several spergouts tinfoiling how a HSTS will seduce/has seduced her Nigel so she definitely has a chip on her shoulder.
Even if I don't feel personally offended at the homophobia towards gay men, it still worries me because in the end we're all the same to (religious) conservatives. You're either seen as predatory, asozial or as a brainwashed victim
in need of reeducation, no matter whether you're a lesbian or gay man. Yeah sure, there are gay men who hate lesbians or are vindictive, but there are also enough straight women who hate lesbians and are vindictive, so not a great argument. Why do they even care about what homosexual men do in the bedroom? It literally doesn't affect anyone. Whatever is annoying about gay men is because they're men, not because they're gay, but homophobechans are somehow convinced that the gay part makes everything worse.>>263180
I get why they hide in their bunkers, but not all of us are coupled up and some of us could use some sane friends!
at least one of those posters said that they were a lesbian in the tranny thread>>263180
sorry but i find it kinda funny how people keep saying that polilezzies feel this big hatred towards butches when what i have seen they constantly have displayed this performative and fake love for butch women and their path to lesbianism many times seemed to involve shaving their heads etc like where do you see this butch hatred
though i'd like to add that these same women did always insult transmascs though so like i said, their love for butches always was performative but maybe it's just some tumblr radfem circles where these women would flip out at other tumblr radfems mentioning wearing make up and other stuff kek so while their love for female masculinity didn't come from a sincere place they didn't show love towards feminine women either? though i guess they only loved female masculinity when it comes to outer appearance but when it comes to behavior they always acted like real proper women are meek, non confrontational, behaved (in stereotypical) feminine ways while (stereotypically) masculine behavior was demonized like women in their heads couldn't show sexual desire because that is manlike, or women couldn't be aggressive because that means they are fake women or moidish for example because women are always meek, nurturing and good?
like there were these weird rules of behaviors like female masculinity is ok when it comes to clothes and hair but femininity is approved when it comes to behavior
Yeah it's quite obvious they're not hating gay men because they're misogynistic but specifically because they're homosexual, especially when they suggest they're "worse than straight men" which makes them definitely sound like larping, homophobic scrotes. I remember when my old LGB friend group involved an archetypal misogynist gay twink with pussy envy snapping at women and while it was annoying as fuck and I even slapped him once for it I would much, much rather deal with that shit than a straight incel. At least he wouldn't rape or sexually assault me and straight men don't back him up so we're on almost equal grounds, and I can somewhat understand his trauma while straight men become spree killers for not having a bangmaid. And besides, like mentioned, letting any kind of homophobia be normalized directly affects lesbians as well.>>263281>>263287
It's been discussed a number of times in this thread. Just go to any polilez-infested place and you see people either calling butches ugly and disgusting (like Lchat) or being more discreet about it (like Ovarit) in the fashion of treating them as gender traitors. At the same time those people go against the trans rhetoric by claiming that people should be comfortable not performing traditional gender roles but then lowkey shame butch lesbians while treating them as male lite and potential rapists. The worst I've heard some anon mention was doormat butches on Ovarit saying that they'd never
touch or harass women in the female bathrooms unlike male troons. Like what the fuck kind of feminist space conditions you to say something like that?
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On the surface they pretend to care about butches and they might even call themselves butch, but there's more to being butch than having short hair and dressing in a lazy way. Polilez have a gender neutral uniform, but they disavow female masculinity and still skew more towards femininity. Whatever the fuck Terri Strange or Sheila Jeffreys wears cannot possibly be considered masculine. The moment you actually want to look handsome or dapper, get a proper haircut, you get shit for it. You're not allowed to be chivalrous and you're not allowed to date femmes or be attracted to them. They can't decide whether the femme or the butch is the victim
in that situation even. Sometimes they assume the butch is exactly like a male chauvinist, other times they assume the femme is oppressing the butch and isn't a real lesbian. It's also a form of classism, polilez are generally (upper)middleclass bihet women, an actual butch is horrifying to them due to the working class connotations. They can't even pretend it's just about the butch-femme coupling, which they think is heteropatriarchal, because if two dapper butches would be dating and being chivalrous to each other and dressing up for each other, that's just as bad to them. Because don't you know, we're all supposed to be sexless or else we're exactly like men?! Even suggesting you're actually attracted to your partner and you're trying to look nice for them in any way shape or form, is just too much!>>263287
Oh yeah the hatred towards lesbians who wear make-up and skirts is a lot more overt, but that's because they're not afraid of pushing you to transition. They won't admit it, but I think polilez definitely played a hand in butches not feeling welcome in the lesbian community nor within feminism. They encouraged the isolation of butches at a critical time when the medical industry first started preying on butches and trying to push for transition. Now polilez are acting like a cult, constantly screeching that they are a safe space for butches, having their minions all over claim that butch women are on their side, when they're actually extremely lesbophobic and butchphobic. I feel like they even ruined the reputation of butches, because I've seen F4F lesbians complain that butches are against their preferences and presentation, when it are the polilez who hate femmes. You're right, ironically enough they seem to love female socialization when it comes to behavior, a strong assertive woman scares them, no matter what you look like. Or the only strong assertive woman is allowed to be their ring leader and the rest has to bow down to them.>>263290>The worst I've heard some anon mention was doormat butches on Ovarit saying that they'd never touch or harass women in the female bathrooms unlike male troons. Like what the fuck kind of feminist space conditions you to say something like that?
I've even seen some say that they don't mind conservative lesbophobes harassing them in the bathroom, as long as it keeps the TiMs out. Since when do TiMs look like butches? Also if they still try to kick you out after hearing your voice and everything, they're not uwu concerned radfems, they're lesbophobes.
LMAO what? what lchat have you been to, from what i remember they surely don't identify as feminists and aren't big on politics, they're just bunch of high femmes who hate everyone who isn't a skinny high femme if they're not moids larping. they invented the word bislut for fuck's sake what polilez uses that kind of word and they have no tolerance for non-goldstars at all, again, what polilez is like that
like lchat is bitchy and butch hating as fuck but calling them polilezzies??
i always thought political lesbians were the kind of women who choose to be lesbian and simp for bisexuals and women who have sex with men and call themselves lesbians
like on lchat they used to have long threads about tumblr queers and calling them polilezzies, now lchatters are polilezzies, polilezzies are everywhere and i have no idea anymore who they are supposed to be
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doubleposting, honestly i am just rambling here like i don't disagree with you guys i know what you mean. i also used to feel bad for being attracted to more feminine women like i am some scroteish predator or that i just have a moid taste because i like femmes or whatever.
at the same time though i felt like i am supposedly giving in to the patriarchy because i care what i look like, like yeah it felt like that unless you dress like hoboish slovenly middle aged woman like sheila jeffreys you are falling to the traps of femininity or something. i am not butch or femme the way i dress really varies a lot but when i dress more masc i want to wear nice shoes and nicely fitting clothes. though it is kinda impossible for me to look properly butch anyway, my body and face is too feminine and i end up always looking femme if i am not wearing frumpy baggy clothes and then i just look like an old auntie playing dress up. i'm just bitter i don't have more androgynous look
Polilez hate proud bi women. Febfem and not sleeping with men isn't good enough for them, they want bi women to larp as lesbian. They think calling yourself bi is a political statement which indicates you're available to men. They only like bi women who are polilez and call themselves lesbian. Majority of Lchat always came across as more conservative assimilationist, they think butches give lesbians a bad name and want us to transition so lesbians aren't being associated with being butch/masc anymore. They act like we're all that's standing in between societal acceptance. They also think butch=fat and if you're skinny you must be a tomboy kek, lots of coping. There are some polilez, bis and rf's on there, but it's not the majority afaik. They're absolutely insane on Lchat thinking Ruby Rose looked better in dresses and long hair btw.>>263310
I'm sometimes jealous I'm not curvy or petite kek. We all got stuff that works for us or doesn't.
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Anon wear what you want, as for that picture there are plenty of more feminine famous terves as well. I know she is straight but just look at Posie Parker.>>263323>Polilez hate proud bi women. Febfem and not sleeping with men isn't good enough for them, they want bi women to larp as lesbian.
This reminds me of Julie Bindel, I like her work but she once wrote an article about how she thinks bisexuals don't exist. I guess she is in denial of her own feeelings. Sad.
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KD Lang would already be too much for them. Omg a suit! Coordination, she thought about her outfit for longer than 2 seconds! Way too, dapper, off to the gulag!
hm i don't fully agree because plenty of l chatters sperg to death about how butches are man wannabes upholding unequal patriarchal gender roles to oppress "normal" feminine women like scrotes do, the femme4femmes there base their sexuality on being pure from anything that reminds them of men which is basically everything (their focus on men when talking about lesbian relationships is obsessive like a polilez) and they write essays bashing butches because "butches make lesbians look bad". that's political
i've even seen some start to bash femmes and say being feminine is just so normal it doesn't need its own word and femme was invented by butches. they think polilez only means bashing femmes for wearing makeup but they do the same thing to butches for not wearing it because it "aligns them with men"
>>263504>I see lesbians get told they're acting like gay men for using the labels and I don't think that's fair.
I seriously think that's a part of the obsession with desexualizing lesbians, even in straight relationship people have varying preferences with sexual behaviour. Leaning towards being more dominant or submissive isn't some BDSM degeneracy, it's just how things tend to be and I hate how some people act as if everyone sexually healthy is just a strict 50/50 when that's never the case. >>263511>They also think that it's a roundabout way of butch-femme, at least how they view butch-femme.
Agree. My girlfriend is femme and definitely the more dominant one than I am as a butch, and it's clear it's them projecting their manhate (or more precisely in their case, hatred of masculinity) to butches once again. Butches are evil, violent, oppressive rapist male lites to them and they treat lesbianism as some fun girl club filling whatever emotional hole they're trying to patch up.>>263513
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gay men have always called themselves gold star, there is an old joke that gay men who were born through caesarean section are platinum star because they're never touched a pussy in their entire lives
does anyone even have source for the tumblr claim that goldstar started as an insult, i only ever have seen whiny tumblr types to talk about it
pic related, some of you might not have even been born yet when this was added
>>263554>one woman acts out what we think a man is
You can't possibly say that, you know what men are like, right? They would never be as caring and chivalrous as a butch, they will never be able to empathize with another woman like a butch, they will never be able to pull off masculinity like a butch. Men rape, abuse, neg, expect their girlfriends to cook for them and do everything for them, won't wash their own asses, don't listen to their girlfriends and won't go down on them. Why the ever loving fuck would we ever want to act that out? You have no idea how fucked up it is what you just said and how misogynistic it truly is what you just said. Butches have a sensitive soft side a man would never have, not the way a woman has. If you want butches to transition, keep saying it's exactly like being a man or acting out what a man is. If you don't want that, then shut the fuck up, you know nothing.>another woman acts out in a submissive role
There are strong dominant femmes who could kick anyone's ass, there are femmes who only top butches, there are femmes who only date femmes, but a fucking lesbophobe wouldn't get that.
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ladies(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
I'd bet good money she is.>>263666
Give and receive what, head or strap? Or both? Either way you're not weird. My wife and I give and receive head nearly every time we have sex. Strap both ways not so much as I'm physically disabled and overcoming a big illness but we have done it a fair bit in the past and I'm sure we will in the future. I've also done it with a couple other partners. It does take a few hours and a lot of stamina but it's good fun. Don't let people meme you into being either top or bottom, stone or not. For the longest time I felt like I had to be the stone top because I'm a butch and no woman would want to do those things to me anyway but it's simply not true. I think there are more versatile lesbians out there than pure tops or bottoms.
No offence, nonny
, but do you have mother issues? 'cause I sure as hell do and in my late teens and most of my twenties I also preferred to date older women (most over 40) for their "maturity" but it was all a big cope. I've made my personal and professional life quite awkward by jumping into bed with any older woman who nurtured me in any way shape or form and mentally it kinda fucked me up too. I hope I'm wrong about you and I don't mean to offend you but I don't want to see anyone go down a similar path to me. I relate to not wanting a wokie or soon to be troon gf though. Just hang in there, love strikes when you least expect it.
It's okay nona, I appreciate your concern though! I don't believe I have mother issues, I had a good and present mother during my childhood, and overall never have felt like I needed the sort of nurturing, in fact that tends to make me feel belittled at times.
Maybe it's all just me not wanting a woke troon who calls everything problematic
or someone who's entirely dependent on me kek. Idk anymore, I'm waiting though lol
kek, but people talking about how a concept exists and isn't the most horrible thing on the planet, doesn't mean you're suddenly weird for feeling like it's not for you. You're completely normal, don't worry too much about it.>>263679>For the longest time I felt like I had to be the stone top because I'm a butch and no woman would want to do those things to me anyway but it's simply not true.
Which is why labels can be actually useful, because that is an assumption people still make. At least if someone has "pillow princess" in their profile I'll know to avoid and I have to indicate I'm "versatile", otherwise I will be put into that "stonetop" box anyway. Even without words like stone or top being in use, they will still project stereotypes from the 40's on butches, so actually having the language to explain what I am and what I'm not is useful. When I was younger I didn't even know what pillow princess, stone, butch, top or bottom was so I was just wondering why I was constantly treated like that and I just had no words for what was going on (I'm ESL and grew up sheltered).>>263692
How does one know they have mother issues? Asking for a friend.
Aight, sorry for sperging. Glad you had a good mother. Dating older lesbians is definitely safer politics wise. My wife and I are both 30 and the lesbian group we hang out with and go on outings with is mostly older couples as a way of keeping out wokies. It's a sad state of affairs that I don't trust lesbians my age until they've said something "transphobic", but you gotta insulate yourself from handmaiden shenanigans.>>263698
Oh don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of labels. Without the word "butch" I wouldn't have met so many of my friends. I just feel that LGB circles can pressure people to adopt them too fast, now more than ever which is why zoomers go through them so quickly and have like a 100 past labels before finishing puberty. I used to think I was a stone top but now I just say "top leaning" as I can only bottom for someone I'm heavily emotionally bonded with because I have capital I issues about it (dysphoric, nearly trooned out, say no more). I also grew up ESL and sheltered so I get what you mean about the importance of defining yourself.
I'm mother issues anon and for me what helped is deeply examining my attraction to older women. Don't focus on the physical, but the emotional. Are you seeking comfort? Do you feel a deep satisfaction from the most simple acts such as cooking for you, looking after you when sick, etc? Also, if you interact with your mother still, is it because you want to? Or because you feel duty bound? If you still live with her, think about moving out, would you truly want to see her still? Honestly though, it's not that easy working it out. I only pushed my mother halfway out my life two years ago, I'm 30 now and still falling back on old habits and letting my sense of "duty" rule my brain so I end being a sucker that sends her thousands of pounds because she's hitting me with guilt trips.
>>263704>now more than ever which is why zoomers go through them so quickly and have like a 100 past labels before finishing puberty.
Seems like that generally happens with the ones living in more progressive areas, I feel like a different species of zoomer sometimes kek>but now I just say "top leaning" as I can only bottom for someone I'm heavily emotionally bonded with because I have capital I issues about it
Yeah I get that. I consider myself a submissive or service top generally, which maybe makes no sense, it does in my brain. Factually speaking I'm versatile, but I also can only bottom for someone I really trust. Once that trust level is reached, I'm completely fine with 50/50 usually.>Do you feel a deep satisfaction from the most simple acts such as cooking for you, looking after you when sick, etc?
Hmm not really, I rather prefer cooking and doing stuff for others. I grew up without a mother, don't really know her and last spoke to her on the phone almost a decade ago. That role was taken up by other female family members since I was an infant and they did just fine. So personally I don't feel like I missed anything, but the mother figure is really revered in society. I'm practically hardcore ghosting her, because she won't admit she's an addict and won't acknowledge the reasons why she lost custody in the first place. So I wonder if that still leads to mother issues.>I only pushed my mother halfway out my life two years ago, I'm 30 now and still falling back on old habits and letting my sense of "duty" rule my brain so I end being a sucker that sends her thousands of pounds because she's hitting me with guilt trips.
Ah that sounds rough, I guess I'm not missing much then kek. It's a lot easier to cut off someone you barely know anyway. Alternatively I do have a sense of duty to those female family members, but they generally don't guilt trip me or ask me for anything. It's more that I'm grateful they were there for me and they keep telling me to not get them a mother's day gift and instead save my money kek.
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I'm sorry nonnie
, I feel this too, even though I'm not in a culture that has strict expectations to have kids. I'm the oldest girl of my siblings and I still feel like I'm the least accomplished, I'm not dating anyone rn so I don't feel like a 'normal' 20 something and I'm stuck in a shitty retail job while my siblings have more career oriented jobs. I know my parents would want grandkids eventually but I'm holding my breath they don't expect any from me soon. It's hard to not want to disappoint your parents but you have to remember you don't exist just to please them (or anyone) >>263805
I don't get why wanting a partner that is nice and to take care of you is mommydom stuff… Isn't that what you should want in a partner? I would get it if like you wanted a gf that did everything
for you, but I would try to take care of my gf whenever she needed it & vice versa, I wouldn't expect one of us to do everything unless she was better at it and liked doing it more. Though I get the older attraction thing, I think I could date someone a little older than me (like early 30's at max, I'm in early 20s) I think this comes from just being attracted to people who have their lives more together than mine though
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Sorry for the super retarded question but how do you protect yourself from std if your hooking up or starting a new relationship ?Obv most of the nonnas here who are sexualy active are in couple so it's not much of an issue for them. I only did stuff where I had no risk of std transmission longtime ago but now I'm a bit worried since I'm trying to date again. I know about the technical stuff ( dental dams or diy alternative ) but wondered how it actually roll out irl.
I remember they used to give out dental dams for free at a local lgbt centre I went to in my youth, I also remember hearing alot of jokes about them "so has anyone in history ever used one of these things" and sticking with that theme I never ended up using the stash of free ones I had on standby. Even went through a sleeping around phase and I found nobody was thinking of barrier methods when it got down to things.
If you're dating with no overlaps you could just test at the beginning of dating
tbh just the name dental dam surely did not helped it to be commonly used. interesting to know how it was>>264102
Thanks for the advice nonnies, since we don't see that stuff in sex aid and the online stuff is on the same level of text book explaination it help to have people talk about it more in context. Tbh I'm lucky the STD testing system is good in my country.
Also >Most see it as overkill but I used to put a condom over my fingers too during sex. Fingernails can retain a lot of germs over the course of the day anyway so I dread to think about adding sex to that equation.
Do peoples don't regulary use nail cleaning brush ? As someone who get my hands daily covered in ink and paint this scare me
Sometimes, it depends on the area like >>264055
says. Usually it are just nasty looks from old people and mothers who feel like they have to protect their children from the scary dyke kek. It rarely gets violent, but it's possible. In liberal areas you're a lot safer, but you will be aggressively assumed to be a TiF from both political sides and one will constantly ask your pronouns and the other thinks "woman" is an insult and not a statement of fact. I don't know if what I'm saying makes any sense, but they will legit try to use "woman" as an insult and it feels very misogynistic to try to turn a normal word into an insult. >>264080
When I was younger I didn't even know there was protection needed for lesbian sex because sex-ed acted like lesbians don't exist. Only straight people, gay men and trannies. So I was an idiot, but a lucky idiot. Even if people make fun of you for it, insist on using protection.
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I never knew wtf a dental dam looked like I thought it was something more like pic rel where is goes over your lips. That honestly is more appealing than the rubber sheet those look so clinical and unsexy it would kill the mood super quick. It does remind of those stretchy exercise leg things though I think I would just play with them like that the whole time kek
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While I was looking these up I found they have fang ones… ngl it might look stupid but it could be fun to play with different teeth shapes
I agree it should something fun to explore with someone and not take too seriously. I think it's one of the reasons why I'm not keen on hookups if I just met the person like that day. I'm too much of a introvert to really let myself loose around someone I just meet. I used to be envious of people who can jump into connections like this but I guess I'm just not like that? I'd rather wait and feel safe with someone I trusted.
>>264650>I'm not keen on hookups if I just met the person like that day. I'm too much of a introvert to really let myself loose around someone I just meet.
One thing I will forever regret is how the ~community~ in local gay bars told me to experiment and sleep around as a baby dyke. I'm painfully autistic and couldn't sleep with a random without being drunk and/or high (which naturally led to addiction problems) and as someone who struggled with being both butch and gay I got stuck in a cycle of:
>crave romantic and/or sexual companionship to tell me I'm not a bad person for being homosexual and GNC>need booze and/or drugs to talk to people though>end up having one night stands that do nothing to give me the companionship and acceptance I crave>feel disgusted by my sexuality and try to supress it by not going to gay bars and meeting up with my friends who support my sexuality>become lonely and depressed and unsure about my identity>rinse, repeat
Sorry for the blogpost but I just want to say that waiting around for the right person is so, so, so
worth it. I'm happily married now but if I could go back in time and do this all over again I would never have casual sex and only sleep with the girlfriends I had a real connection with.
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I would have questions about how the husbandofaggotry works for you specifically, but you had me until the last point.>>264668
NTA but how it went for me>be only butch in town>part of emo groups, where it had become popular for everyone to claim they're bi>became designated person to experiment with, get ego boost>most decide it's not for them and immediately go back to men>lonely, feel unattractive because of aforementioned and just want connection so keep allowing being used for experimenting
I'm still not sure if I've ever had sex with someone who was actually attracted to me and not because I was just available and visible. I feel like I've been really lucky not to catch anything from that time of my life. Now I feel so emotionally stunted, more avoidant and while I'm far from a virgin, I still feel like I haven't had any real experience. At the same time I've also let myself get strung along by straight women who used me as some sort of celibate female boyfriend, until they got an actual one and it took me a while to pick up on how much of a simp I am. Bit of a mindfuck.
The most important thing to me by far is having similar personality and interests so>nerdy af>openminded to trying new things, willing to go out of her comfort zone to experience new things>polite and well-intentioned towards people and animals>loves cats
but when it comes to appearance I'm way less picky. Honestly as long as we get along and have chemistry then that's way more attractive to me, but I do tend to have patterns in who I've dated before.>mid length hair, around shoulders or shorter, preferably curly/fluffy>strong fashion sense, can be either androgynous/masc or very femme, having a personal style in itself is attractive to me>chest on the smaller side>brown eyes>slim, but some chub is fine, especially around the hips/butt>cute face, big smile
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As young as I can remember how I think my adult life would have been, I never saw myself living with a man. I would like have a child or two but always live with a female, a sister or a "friend". Idk why it always appeared naturally like that in my mind, I always wondered if it was the same for other lesbian ?
>did you remember how you projected your adult life as a child?
>Did you saw yourself living with a man ?
When I was 6, my male best friend and I decided we were getting "friend married" when we were older and living together. Of course we didn't know back then that "friend marriages" weren't a thing so we never got joined together in holy matri-homie. Aside from that I was generally terrified of my future. To this day I don't really
know why. My only guess is that I was starting to realise I was "different" from the other girls and my brain tried blocking it out. By the time I was 13 I did know that I didn't want a man in my life but I didn't really want a woman in my life either. Thing is though, as a butch I've really struggled with female friendships my whole life. I was always the weird nerdy tomboy that none of the other girls could relate to so my experiences are usually different to more gender conforming women. I'm also autistic so naturally I was more inclined towards solitude. I did think about having a child, I thought it would be nice but I didn't want to do the deed with a moid and didn't know sperm banks existed back then. I always just assumed I would be comfortably alone until I got together with my first girlfriend and realised that I do enjoy companionship after all, with the right people. I'm now 30, happily married and my wife and I hope to start trying for a baby in the few months, fingers crossed.
When I was a child I wanted to become a plant or animal researcher who travels the world and goes on adventures, yes I'm a sperg. I didn't really think about children or marriage. I did self-insert as the guy in some movies, which didn't mean I want to be a man, because most men in those movies aren't like irl men at all, I just really liked the actress. At some point one of my friends got her period early and everything changed, she wasn't allowed to play outside anymore and suddenly everything was about her preparing to become a good wife and mother. I freaked out and had 2 weeks I told everyone I was a boy because of it when I was 7. When I was explained in detail how pregnancy works, I decided I never wanted to get pregnant. Family members started freaking out that I wasn't growing out of being a tomboy and almost sent me to their home country for some sort of femininity training, I managed to luck out and avoid it. I started pursuing other girls when I was 13 (though most came to me)? I insisted I was straight though, because I was basically told that lesbianism is an immature thing you need to grow out of and nobody stays that way. Which was kinda stupid, since I stayed gnc, it was obvious what I am to everyone else anyway. The lesbophobia and some mild conversion therapy made me feel very conflicted, because while I never saw myself living with a man and never wanted to, I did want to be accepted, to be (seen as) mature, so sometimes I did wish I was straight. Especially when my father started making thinly veiled threats.
! I read this thinking this would be a sad tale of solitude but hearing your happy ending made me ♥ hope your baby comes out healthy, I'm sure babby will be extra loved with two mothers. I am really excited to do that in the future too.
Honestly I found your post quite relatable. For me, as a little kid it was>cutting my hair really short because long hair was annoying>wearing boyish clothes>sometimes calling myself a boy (i am so glad 'trans kids' weren't accepted around 2011-2014>being friends with mostly males but wanting very strongly for girls to accept me>having one female friend who i was way too possessive over>feeling guilty about hugging girls and avoiding contact with other girls>never thinking about a future with a man but wanting a 'best friend' who i stay with forever and live with, pretending to be the husband of my best friends just for a giggle
Except for me, at puberty, I didn't think I was homo. I thought >'kind of weird I don't find men attractive and I think of women like a man would', but it will probably sort itself out by the time I'm…18? Yeah! I'll like men one day!
And I remember in school many people used to call me slurs and I didn't know why. So I chose my male friend and convinced myself I liked him, except when he got romantic i just felt disgusted and avoided him permanently, all whilst having a secret 'involvement' with this other girl (who was a blatant lesbo in retrospect kek). I also watched tutorials on how to act feminine, wore skirts, pretended to like things my friends liked, and it kind of worked for a bit! I felt like I was going to be accepted into girl world. I just wanted to stop being seen as a weirdo/not one of the girls/masculine.
These days I have only just started allowing myself to wear clothes that are more comfortable for me, like I can wear more masculine clothes if I feel like it, and don't feel the need to pretend to like different things. I now know that because I'm a little different I think my life may be a little lonelier, but I'm not pretending to be someone else anymore.>>264838
That's kind of sad anon. I think it's pretty normal for young lesbos see see themselves as men because they don't see other lesbians in real life, so liking women makes them feel like a man. I don't know where you grew up but it's heartbreaking that a little girl loses her childhood for the perceived responsibility of womanhood. I hope you're not in that environment anymore.
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>>264843>I think it's pretty normal for young lesbos see see themselves as men because they don't see other lesbians in real life, so liking women makes them feel like a man.
I unironically cope by reading books by butch authors where they explain in detail how x character in movie is actually based on a butch and not a man, so if you identified with that character, you still indirectly identified with butchness or something adjacent to it. Maybe it's a retarded cope and butchwashing, but it works for me. I did pick up things from those men in movies and shows, because sometimes I did admire them, but someone like Gomez Addams is not exactly a source of toxic
masculinity, so I think I'm fine. I still don't feel connected to womanhood, because I grew up in an environment where that meant straight housewife and it was always tied to reproduction, fertility and femininity. At the same time I've never actually felt like a man or truly wanted to be a man, because I started hating them pretty quickly and got upset when I was introduced to the concept of transitioning for the first time. I just feel like a butch female.>I don't know where you grew up but it's heartbreaking that a little girl loses her childhood for the perceived responsibility of womanhood.
Biblebelt, it was genuinely shocking. It felt like living in a place where everyone is Carrie's mom (Margaret White picrel). The whole neighborhood was speaking shame of her getting her period early, as if she caused it herself through sinning or something.>I hope you're not in that environment anymore.
I'm not in the most extreme part anymore, but also not exactly a liberal area. Though I don't know if I'd enjoy a liberal area either with all the pronoun stuff and I don't want to be interrogated about my gender (expression).
I'm glad I could show you there can be light at the end of the tunnel! Also nice to know I'm not alone with wanting to be a mother. I feel like modern lesbian circles are slowly becoming against the idea of having children. From my experience a lot of women will turn it into a political slapfight and insinuate you're a misogynist for it. I don't mean women who simply don't wish to have children (I have plenty of friends who don't and I get it), what I mean is those who ideologically oppose it and are the types to post on r/childfree about how much they hate kids.>>264846
Drop the butchwashing book links, I could do with some copium. I've always had periods of obsession with movie men since I was a tween where I've either been like: >"Whoa, he's literally me! Except he should be butch instead!".>"Whoa! I want to be him! Except butch!"
I also went through a phase of wanting to be called Johnny. Not in a troon way, but in a cool, butch way. Kinda still do, ngl.
wtf? i don't get why there are places where girls are made to feel guilty for their biology. and when women go along with stuff like this it's extra sad.
i get not feeling connected to womanhood. it helped when i found a circle of dorky weird girls to be feral with, and a sports coach who was a masculine woman and mother who lived on her own terms. if i grew up somewhere like that i would have hated it too. i think 'biblebelt' means america? i always assumed america was really fair to women and that you had freedom, so it was sad to hear some people grow up like that. but yeah i know i would hate being around pronoun people too. it's a fine line kek>>264850
the r/childfree types creep me out tbh. motherhood is very admirable, you're helping build society, and it's not like you stop being a human who does other things after motherhood, especially if your partner is supportive.
Sorry but whats the point ? there are very little chance to get std and the dental dam are gross and a pain in the arse.
Just be careful if you have cuts in your mouth.
>>264850>Jack/Judith Halberstam - Female Masculinity>Jack/Judith Halberstam - A queer time and place>The Butch Woman Inside James Dean or ‘What Kind of Person Do You Think a Girl Wants?’ by Marie Cartier (her theory is that he hung around butch women and based his characters on them, because he was gay himself).
I was given a gender neutral nickname which I still prefer, so I get it.>>264854>>264875
Other countries which seem progressive have biblebelts too. I basically moved with catholic family to an area with the equivalent of FLDS or Pentecostal types. All the women had to wear long dresses and skirts, long hair is very important to them etc. My family is conservative too, but holy shit biblebelt places are on a new level. They even caused my family to walk out during mandatory (because of school) Christmas church service, because they implied Mary is a whore, like no woman is safe from scrutiny, not even fucking Mary.
Honestly if gay men were larping as anime girls together with no interest in IRL women I would think that's the gayest fucking thing I've seen, it's no different with lesbians. Don't know why so many anons choose to die on the "liking unrealistic cartoon men means you love and desire actual men" hill when they probably wouldn't have a problem with anons simping female characters created by and for men.>>264705>>264775
Yeah personally my experience with bi women has been being treated as "male lite" i.e. someone they don't quite see as a woman but a more emotionally available version of masculinity. It's painful to listen to them gush about men that you can never become and you know they're most likely longing for the muscular, tall Nigel that they'd be proud to date and show off. I mean I absolutely understand why bisexual women end up with men out of convenience, it's much easier since you don't have to deal with homophobia anymore and having children is much easier, but they shouldn't act all hurt and offended when lesbians don't want to date you and don't start whining about how much you hate straight sex and miss having a girlfriend. You made your bed and now you have to lie on it. >>264819
I had this weird thing where I subconsciously knew I was a lesbian but saw myself growing up to a straight marriage because I didn't even know you could have an alternative in my bumfuck conservative town. Yet at some point in my teens I realized this "husband" that I had made up in my head was actually myself and "me as the wife" was the girlfriend that I had dreamed of.
Anime isn't real. >>264933>I subconsciously knew I was a lesbian but saw myself growing up to a straight marriage because I didn't even know you could have an alternative
Yes same here. I was totally defeated by the idea that I'd have to marry a man because I knew from the start I could never love him. I'd be like "maybe it'd be fine if we were just really good friends…" kek. I feel grateful to have grown up in a relatively progressive area so I had the opportunity to date other girls and realise it doesn't have to be that way. >>264965
I check all of these boxes lmao. Let's date
Thank you! I'm incredibly nervous but also very excited and already knee deep in baby books kek. My wife and I have the exact same problem with donor ethnicity. When we were still trying to work out the specifics of when to try and where to have it done, etc, we tried finding someone who was my special blend of mutt but to no avail; and my wife was looking for months
. I did try telling her I don't mind using someone who isn't a perfect match, but I can understand how she feels. We're now going to do reciprocal IVF because it feels more natural that we're both involved in the process; thankfully finding a donor for my wife's ethnicity is easier.
Ugh i get so annoyed by ‘lesbians’ who can’t stop talking about men from books/anime. I hated myself for so long for not being attracted to the male form, or anything resembling a man, so I was so happy to find women who feel the same way. Someone is attracted to drawings of children, would you not think them a pedo? So why is being attracted to a drawing of a man not being attracted to the male form? You’re either biphobic, hate men too much to admit you may be attracted to them, or feel too ugly for a man so pretend you never wanted them anyway. To an outsider, someone who doesn’t use this website, they would think that someone who shlicks to a drawing of a man is obviously attracted to men. But some people here get so hostile about being told they’re not lesbian that no one wants to call them out. And with more posts about this here, I think people are going to get tired of it.
Then there are bisexuals who try to tell us that you can be attracted to the male form and be a lesbian as long as ‘it not real!’, and will come into spaces made for women like us to tell us we’re wrong. Just be who you are. Ok, so maybe you hate men. That doesn’t make you a lesbian. Being bisexual is fine, but lesbianism is not a political statement or a refuge from you issues with men. I just want to be in a space where I’m understood and there are people appropriating it.
I wouldn’t say a man who dreams of fictional men and has figurines of anime boys is straight.
Also, if you want to dress up as an anime boy because it feels more ‘you’, please go ahead. I’m happy to see butch acceptance in this thread. But if you’re attracted to males, fictional male included, and want to sperg about their bodies or how sexy they are, please leave.
I'm the OP of that dream girlfriend post and I find it very funny how many anons derailed to scold me.>>264975
None of the people defending fujos or yumes ITT were gushing about men or the male form or trying to convince anyone that they should be attracted to men, fictional or otherwise. It's literally just you samefagging and shitting up the thread. You are the only sperg here.
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>>264983>I'm a fujo but my girlfriend is a husbandofag who finds IRL men repulsive. She just asks me to cosplay as her husbandos all the time and I'm fine with it kek
I want you to reread this sentence about you masturbating to men all the time and letting your gf pretend you're a man from her animeys and reflect, dear bi4bi anon
You can't come to lesbian thread, talk about male characters and get upset people don't like it. Even this anon >>265073
got redtexted. Go to bi thread.
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>coming out story
So I was not coming out, but found out. In the worst way possible.
>be me, 13, hormones are raging
>i was mildly obsessed with mermaids ever since the tv show h20 came out when i was small
>so i doodle mermaids in my spare time
>think…what if booba…BIG BOOBA
>pretty much the babydyke version of the sketching scene from 'turning red'
>i cut out my booba mermaids and hide them in my schoolbag to look at later
a few days later
>my older sister is being a b word so i steal her tie and hide it in my schoolbag for the keks
>mum says i know you have it give it back or i'll scalp ur bahookie (ass whooping in scottish terms)
>i don't lose my cool
>she approaches my schoolbag
>i freak out a little too much 'MUM I'LL GIVE IT BACK NO'
>i give the tie back
>and my mum says 'what are ye hidin in there?'
>am covered in sweat
>she opens my bag as i freak out and procures my artwork
>'we need to have a talk about this'
>she shuts the door and we have a talk in another room together
>why did ye draw THIS? are ye gay?
>i am making some crazy excuses on the spot:
>i just…love art haha
>it's like societal commentary on how women are viewed (cringe)
>it's a present for someone?
in the end the drawings are binned and we never talk about it again. but i think since then my mum always kind of knew, and it was probably the most mortifying moment of my whole life. please tell me someone else has a more embarrassing story
I insisted I was straight to family while being a tomboy who pastes pictures of attractive women everywhere (bedroom walls, closet doors, school locker, school agenda, etc.), drawing big booba anime girls and I didn't hide anything, except my exgf, but it was obvious what was going on. I was wondering why people called me a dyke when I'm obviously the straightest straight who ever straighted, which straight doesn't dance with a girl at the school dance while wearing a suit and top hat? I think it's pretty cringe that I brought girls up to my coomer tier bedroom from back then. I don't know if I was too autistic to feel shame, but my family doesn't believe lesbianism is real anyway. They only started freaking out real bad when I turned 16 and they started to get suspicious that I might not grow out of it kek. Some family members have accepted it by now, because I'm such an aggressively obvious case.
>>265394>be you>trip>spaghetti falls out of pockets>your plethora of butts fall out your pocket>your great wealth of butts is guarded by the great dragon Smaug in a deep and hidden cave (shaped like a butt)>you squirrel away your supply of butts in a tree for the winter>>265412
I’m HOWLING at the imagery of the ass rat kekekek>>265367
That sounds embarrassing enough to make me feel better lol
Anime thighs are supreme and I understand your interest>>265408
Idk if we’re the same person here, right down to>why every1 calling me gay??
It sounds like you were kind of a player though, hopefully the rest of your family accepts you.>>265360
Not since that day, very tragic lol>>265382
if i did i would be good to her and never hide her skins
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LMAO i was also very insistent about being straight but i guess my dad suspected something when i begged him to buy me a ranma ½ book with this exact cat girl ranma in the cover, like my dad was just like "really? you want this?"
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i know i should not be angry but, when i was 12 i had this little middle school "girlfriend" and my older sister found out one day, and decided to tell our very religious single mom. she took me to her room and grieved in front of me, crying about how unnatural it was. i remember it weirdly vividly and i even asked her why it was wrong.
now 9 years later my sister comes out as bi & is dating a butch lesbian
>i don't really care if she was repressing or whatever she still threw me under the bus
typical polilez pearl clutching, lesbians that arent reserved and practically ace are akin to moids, hmmm? whats moidy about her post, specifically, enlighten me without pulling out seething lesbophobia. Plenty of women have come into this thread before and said they saw a hot woman they would like to preform sexual favors on her. Is it that she mentioned being turned on at her instead of going straight to describing her fantasies of sexual acts that triggers
you so? Women have described much crasser to a positive reaction, which leaves me to believe the problem is with you and your delicate (paranoid) sensibilities. What is the "good" lesbian statement when a woman confesses her attraction? "Omg girls are so pretty!!"? Or "i want to braid her hair and hold hands!!"?
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I was such a comphet when I was younger it make me want to kick my formerself in the jaw.
Also if it was not shit enought I have no "gaydar" and the only girl at school who show interest in me is bi and cheated on her boyfriend with girl.
I wish I was not a stupid autistic lesbian.
Doubleposting/samefagging because I just saw this but the agp literally samefagged so their sexual fantasy gets attention, see this where he >>265745
replied to himself two times and then got redtexted. It's literally a very obvious larp.
32 single virgin here. (man that’s gross). i am very pro-sex toys. self or with a partner. i’m scared of them cause they’re so powerful but so many women swear by clit suckers. i ended up giving mine away.
I don’t know how toys feel like with partners. but i could never masturbate acoustically. putting my own fingers in myself feels like when the doctor does it. or like trying to tickle myself.
When I'm with a partner strap-on play just isn't high on my list of things to do usually. Like anon above I mostly crave penetration close to or even during my period so I go solo with a toy. I can't personally be arsed initiating strap-on play with a risk of blood. Thanks body lol
I used to like Tantus toys alot but where I live now customs rates make them too pricey for me, I switched to Lovehoneys own range of silicone toys. Both have a decent range of harness compatible toys or offer bundles where you can buy the set together.
With my gf we quickly bought sex toys. A strap but also bondage and a whip. It's ok but the installation time is annoying kek. It's less spontaneous. My girlfriend craves penetration tho so she loves it.
Also quite embarassing but using a strap quite worsen my dysphoria about having a penis.
Since little I wanted to be a boy. Then porn kinda fed this dysphoria - since it's mens POV. And finally yeah using a strap on a woman doesn't help to fight the dysphoria !
But no worries I know I could never be a man.
and not to be too graphic but:
eating a girl out while I grind on her leg until she comes & she then devotes attention to me >>>>