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File: 1614906710472.jpg (119.68 KB, 1024x818, godiwishthatwereme.jpg)

No. 174105

Please keep posts focused on women and female homosexuality! If you want to talk about attraction toward men it probably belongs in the bisexuality thread or questioning thread. Topics of discussion may include but are not limited to:

>first crush?

>what’s your local lesbian/LGBT scene like?
>cute stories about your gf
>favourite lesbian media?
>lesbian media you hate?
>coming out stories
>are there any cows you’d uhaul with?
>bitch about being lonely
>butch? femme? how do you feel about labels?
>how did you know you were gay?
>which lesbian stereotypes do you fit? which ones don’t fit you at all?
>what were you like as a kid? tomboy? girly girl who made her Barbies kiss?
>get mushy and describe your dream relationship/date/etc
>best date?
>worst date?

No. 174111

Oh my god, thank you OP for keeping the photo vintage. Haha this made my day.

>first crush?

Phoebe Belle Cates

No. 174121

File: 1614933894121.jpg (84.8 KB, 750x931, 5feb9c6c4d9aaf423ca8492adbfcea…)

to the girl that i met at the beach when i was 12 years old who talked and swam with me for hours, laughed at my stupid jokes and told me that i was being cute, told me that she wanted to be my "very very good pal" then winked, held my hand, said i was cuter when i told her i found her very pretty, told me that she wanted to point blank kiss me, and made me promise to return back to the same beach because she wanted to see me again the next day but i didn't because i was way way too nervous.. where are you at now queen? no other lesbians have been that blunt to me and this memory still makes me feel like the simulation was glitching to help me realize i'm gay as hell. wtf. :(

No. 174129

Do any of you plan to emigrate partially due to your sexuality? I have been thinking about it but sometimes I have doubts, since I am not from violently homophobic country and because of that my reason is not valid enough. I just want to live a normal, quiet life with a shot at marriage and without getting dirty looks from neighbors or pretending to be a straight woman that needs no man in front of everyone, somewhere where you don't get shit on for being gay. I would probably be also a lot more happy and less anxious. And yeah, I know nowhere is perfect, but there are better places.

No. 174130

I think that when I’m finally interested in dating (especially for the long-term) I might want to settle in an area where people won’t look twice if I’m holding hands with my wife.

No. 174131

File: 1614942633371.jpg (658.39 KB, 1536x2048, EcAzAXJXQAAwLZa.jpg)

I'm curious, what kind of women are you all into? Any particular features or styles you go for?

Looks-wise, I tend to notice women's stomachs/abs and arms/shoulders, odd as that may sound. A nice pair of abs or some muscle definition in their arms really does something for me. My girlfriend thinks it's a little strange; she's very much into round booty and long legs, kek. I also have a weakness for black hair + tan skintones.

Girlfriend and I are also a bit divided on style preferences…she likes those sharp polished femme girls, but I really go for 90's grunge/skater/punk girls, tattoos, dyed hair, piercings, anyone who looks a bit rebellious. At least my girlfriend and I are united in our love for goth ladies and soft butch tomboys like picrel.

This gave me feels. Also reminds me of my best friend in high school who was drop-dead gorgeous, and also had black hair and tanned skin, ugh. This friend decided that I was her "daughter" and she was my "mom" and this meant it was OK for us to be hugging and kissing each other on the cheek and generally being super-affectionate. I figured out I was gay about a year after she got switched to another school and we stopped seeing each other.

No. 174135

I do, although I do live in a violently homophobic country. I also have economic and religious reasons that make me want to leave but homophobia is the main one. The only thing that made me cope with living here was the hope of finding a country where I can finally live instead of be in a constant state of survival. The entire TRA situation in the west kinda crushed that hope though. If that ideology keeps getting more popular there then I'd just leave a country where I'm called a deviant degenerate for one where I'm called a bigot for being a lesbian. What's the difference?

The fact that there's no good place in the world for lesbians has kept me up at night more than once. How do you girls cope with it?

No. 174139

File: 1614946600869.png (105.77 KB, 650x400, 54323454.png)

>I'm curious, what kind of women are you all into? Any particular features or styles you go for?

I prefer chubby women, as long as she’s healthy enough to like go for walks with me without dying. Big plus if she’s shorter than me too. I don’t really care about abs but strong arms make me melt. I love body hair on women too, I think it’s really cute.

Style-wise butch and GNC women own my heart. Especially if they’re a bit alternative. I love tattoos, especially sleeves. Also I know we’re supposed to find it cringy but I kinda love it when they dress like teenage boys lol. Like sneakers and band tshirts.

Lea DeLaria is pretty close to my ideal. If she dressed like a metalhead she’d be perfect.

No. 174141

>Also I know we’re supposed to find it cringy but I kinda love it when they dress like teenage boys lol.
Hehe same here.
Lea looks good for a woman in her 60s, she must be a happy lady!

No. 174143

You would fuck your pic related? Damn. The gays are not alright

No. 174161

Agree. All women are beautiful but God I wish the fat ones would lose weight. It's depressing just looking at them.

No. 174165

>The entire TRA situation in the west kinda crushed that hope though.

You could still come somewhere west and find sanctuary. There is a lot of TRA stuff, but it’s still relatively “online”. You could find someone without the fear of violence or death…

No. 174168

File: 1614968122191.png (67.52 KB, 1166x339, stats.PNG)

I get you, and had similar fears (mostly was afraid of some tranny going apeshit on me) but the reality is like the >>174165 said. Transgender ideology mainly exists online and for many of them it is a roleplay/fetish.
I just looked up related stats from Canada, because it is one of the countries I think of at least trying to live in and because everyone paints it as some transgendered hellhole where everyone gets puberty blockers on their 12th birthday. Granted, the survey was from 2018, BUT
>First, these results can be compared with the results from the Survey of Safety in Public and Private Spaces (SSPPS) conducted by Statistics Canada in 2018, which also contained questions about sex at birth and gender. According to that survey, 0.24% of the Canadian population was comprised of transgender men, women or non-binary individuals.
Less than 1%. In real world you would be interacting with straight normies that don't know anything about twitter gender wars that are happening every day. They would not be calling you a bigot for not sucking dick. You should look at it from another point and start thinking about normal people, not terminally online retards

No. 174169

File: 1614968409496.png (54.09 KB, 1160x260, stats2.PNG)

About the same 2018 survey from https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/daily-quotidien/200909/dq200909a-eng.htm. You can see non-straights are around 4% of population compared to <1% gender people. So reality isn't as grim as it looks on the web.

No. 174170

I spent a long time thinking I wasn't into butches, turns out I'd only really been exposed to the fat white ones kek

No. 174171

Yeah I know, that's why I haven't given up on leaving. It's just that I'm not as optimistic about it as I used to.

Thanks for the stats! That does give me some relief. My only exposure to the west and gay communities is online so I have no idea how it is irl. Honestly it's not the straight normies that I'm worried about. If you want to meet women irl (bars, meetups, etc), you'd eventually have to deal with wokies and gender specials wouldn't you? Unless you only try to online date or get really lucky and find a sane woman through other means. At least that's how it seems to me from what I gathered (for example: I hear that GSA assocs at school are mostly gay, trans and some bis nowadays).

How is it in your experience?

No. 174175

From you first post I thought you were worried about the general public calling you bigot, so that is why I found some stats to show that gendies are a really small population
I can't give you an advice rooted in experience because I am the anon that asked the original question about moving.
>If you want to meet women irl (bars, meetups, etc), you'd eventually have to deal with wokies and gender specials wouldn't you?
I worry about that too. Also, moving countries doesn't mean I would find a relationship (though chances would be higher) but my thoughts are - if I don't at least try, I will regret it. I know if I stay my chances at a happy romantic life would be lower not only because of being closeted and potentially lonely, but also because of my legal status. I couldn't just sit and try to build life with another woman while I know that legally we are two strangers and have to either jump through hoops or pay enormous taxes in some cases (inheritance, buying property together etc.). You can forget about having any children too.

>I hear that GSA assocs at school are mostly gay, trans and some bis nowadays

From what I've read, GSA is full of straight girls and gendies lol that don't shy away from witch hunting gays. Or maybe I am thinking of another association.

You could look into being an international student for example, and working at your destination country afterwards for couple of years and see how it is.

No. 174177

>I'm curious, what kind of women are you all into? Any particular features or styles you go for?
i like all types of women, but the average/healthy female body is absolutely beautiful. i wish more girls with that body type learned how to love themselves.

No. 174180

File: 1614985293909.png (1.04 MB, 640x771, unknown (1).png)

I used to be a nonbinary and my gf peaked me. We're both farmers now. Literally living the dream

No. 174181

I'm a tomboy, the kind with sneakers, oversized t-shirts and snapbacks and defined muscle. I'm either into really femme-presenting cute girls that have a mischievous side and can be brutal when in trusted company. My dream gf would be a femme girl with small stature but a foul mouth, a good sense of humor, a relentless manhating terf who's into smutty sex. Always been a huge weak point for me and I dream about someone like her all the time.

No. 174182


No. 174185

File: 1614992323807.jpg (94.71 KB, 794x794, nana.jpg)

Great thread pic and I like your prompts in the OP as well, cheers.

>are there any cows you’d uhaul with?

lmfao love this, though i got no cows i'm that fond of. Dasha Nekrasova is cute to me but she is upsettingly retarded.

>bitch about being lonely

I AM LONELYYYYYYYYYYYYY the woman i want seems to reciprocate but it's complicated. i wish i had a magic wand

>butch? femme? how do you feel about labels?

I feel the labels are unnecessary and cultish. I particularly dislike the sorta butch that larps as a fuccboi, though I find them hot in general. Just not into anyone that wants to meme themselves into male socialization. I'll take any fit/slim woman with nice skin and a good brain really, it's not about the butch/femme scale for me.

>how did you know you were gay?

I've always known that I was attracted to women but it took falling in love with one in my mid 20s to realize men aren't included in my sexuality. The way I felt for her romantically was just completely above and beyond any man I thought I loved. I realized I only felt close friendship to men.

>which lesbian stereotypes do you fit? which ones don’t fit you at all?

I rant about how gross and useless men are when drunk. Is that a stereotype? It certainly makes the men in the room uncomfortable which is a good thing.

>what were you like as a kid? tomboy? girly girl who made her Barbies kiss?

Pretty girly in style early on, though I began to wear baggy male clothes once my body developed and men started to give me too much attention. Tried to hide it.

No. 174193

No. 174194


No. 174204

So uh… where do you live anon?

No. 174230

I like tomboys/butches and femmes as long as they look natural (not much make up, fake lashes or stuff like that, dont get me wrong it can look really pretty and cool but isnt sexually attractive to me.) Dark hair and being shorter than me are also common on the women I find attractive.

No. 174240

File: 1615040482720.jpeg (33.74 KB, 500x750, 3e3dd6b2-b2de-4106-9972-046adf…)

I really love the soft gamine style with some punk elements. Dresses and long skirts sometimes are cute, but I'm not really into heels and long hair. Buzzcuts make women 100% more beautiful and noticeable to me. Someone similar size to me, maybe a little shorter
Bonus points if she's short with a fiery temper kek

My other type would be someone slightly chubby and taller than me, I think it'd be nice to cuddle.

My style is pretty basic, a lot of turtlenecks, oversized sweaters and pants, and boots almost all year. So basically Daria

No. 174243

so i'm mostly butch (buzzcut, wear men's clothes, no bra or a sports bra/binder + boxers) i don't shave or wear makeup, and i'm 5'11'' so people think i'm male 90% of the time until i speak.

recently i caved in and bought a few dresses for when the weather gets warmer, as i used to love wearing dresses as a kid and it gets pretty warm here. i haven't worn one in years now, i trooned out at 15 and then desisted a few years ago, just when i was about to get approved for HRT.

anyways idk i'm just worried people are going to stare at me a lot and think i'm a transvestite. or even worse that someone's gonna attack me because i live in a homophobic country lol. any girls went through something similar?

No. 174247

I haven’t had the same experience as you. But maybe accessorize when you wear a dress? Like add on a hat or scarf. People might not think of you as a transvestite, but rather just fashionable and edgy. But honestly do what you want and fuck other ppl. You sound cute btw lol

No. 174255

File: 1615048193207.jpg (102.74 KB, 1280x720, tomboy.jpg)

> I know we’re supposed to find it cringy but I kinda love it when they dress like teenage boys lol. Like sneakers and band tshirts.
Is that cringe? I'm very cringe then, kek.


Love it. I really wish there were more tomboys and gamines out there in the media; I know they exist IRL. But scrotes can only fap to femme lesbians so that's what we've mostly been getting. And I'm worried that a whole lot of young girls see all boyish women as fakebois in denial. Like girls are having a whole gender identity crisis over wanting to cut their hair short and stop wearing makeup or smth.

No. 174292

Anon, your pic… they look like they are about to bully me. I'm scared

No. 174441

I know this SuperStraight thing is mostly satire and all, but dae think that this tactic has potential to help out lesbians? It has already made the cotton ceiling crap a bit more visible to straight normies. We could also take advantage of this loophole if normal means don't work.

No. 174448

And give nazis from 4chan who started it the satisfaction? Nope. I don't believe in "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" rule

No. 174450

It was actually started by a 16 yo kid on Tiktok…

No. 174453

As >>174450 said it was some kid on TikTok who did. The people smearing it with Nazi shit are probably angry troons themselves. Not an uncommon strategy of theirs

No. 174454

File: 1615161920848.jpg (234.42 KB, 996x2048, Tumblr_l_191749801308621.jpg)

Maybe he started it but 4chan helps spreading it and they even made the colors of the "flag" that's now used on Reddit

No. 174456

4chan is right sometimes. This is one of those times.

No. 174459

But it's the same people who would want to kill all gay men, rape lesbians to fix them and take voting rights away from women lmao I don't care if a nazi is able to notice that a male tranny is not a real woman, such observation is as obvious as poiting out that water is wet. Doesn't mean I should enable anything that comes from those subhuman men.

No. 174460

Regardless of who started it and for what reason, it's pretty obvious that people from all walks of life are sick of tranny shit and this makes it way more visible. So yes, I think it absolutely can help out lesbians, even if only to make it obvious to everyone how prevalent and awful the 'not wanting to fuck me is oppression' party line is.

No. 174468

of course twitter hijacked the hashtags and are uwu upset… can everyone just peak already, im tired.

No. 174484

not everything on the internet is from 4chan. you give that site too much credit.

No. 174485

they did not make the flag, that's not even the official flag and radfem lesbians are active on that sub too. you're giving 4chan way too much credit. the only thing they did is their usual mediocre thing of slapping nazi symbols on everything.

No. 174527

Do Superstraight stans actually think that once trans are taken down, straights are going to leave the rest of LGB alone? Are you seriously that naive? After mass peaking they are going to come for us because we are from the same community. Normies do not see a difference between a lesbian, gay man or a troon. Ffs, the LGBT acceptance rates are dropping, you really think this has nothing to do with you and after dropping the T we are going to enter gay utopia?
And yall who are ready to jump on the enemy of my enemy is my friend bandwagon, lmao good luck sweetheart, but straights are never going to fight for lesbian rights.

No. 174528

I think most people behind this movement with a working brain understand that 1), being same-sex attracted is not even in the same universe as being a troon, and 2), lesbians aren't forcing anyone to sleep with them or trying to convince people to "unpack their genital preferences", or call people "genital fetishists". People have created the "LGB drop the T" movement for a reason, and i think most straights understand that being gay is a natural state, while being trans-identified is a mentall illness.
People that used to discriminate against the lgb community will continue to do so old-fashioned style, why do they have to have a 'super'-movement to prop up their hatred? Besides, I dont think people who support homosexuals will suddenly 'peak' and stop supporting, we've done literally nothing except for exist.

No. 174529

Which lesbian want straight men to fuck her, lmao?
Because that's the whole point of the superstraight thing. It was caused by trannies insisting that everyone must validate them sexually. No one else in the LGBT does that shit, only the Ts.

No. 174531

Replying here because the thread got locked.
>Go lick some tranny gash or suck some meat sock cock nonnie
That's funny you say that because the majority of "lesbians" here (and "lesbians" in general I bet) sucked dick in the past out of their own will and they believe that "compulsory heterosexuality" is a thing, even though it was a term made up by a polilez. So what we have on "SuperStraights" Reddit is a bunch of fakebians and hetties wanting to feel special and MAYBE a small group of genuine homosexuals lmao

No. 174548

>Normies do not see a difference between a lesbian, gay man or a troon.
Stop acting like sexuality and gender are the same.
>the LGBT acceptance rates are dropping, you really think this has nothing to do with you
Yeah it has to do with the people telling others that if they like bio men/women they are "genital fetishists". Or the people getting women's shelters closed down because they don't want to accept men. Or the people giving hormones to kids who aren't even old enough to drive but can apparently make life changing decisions.

Anon don't be obtuse, don't try to waterdown all our issues into the same thing like this is "all lives matter". this superstraight thing has plenty of push from both lesbians and gay men who saw their spaces being coopted.

No. 174553

File: 1615226251857.jpg (498.66 KB, 1439x1402, 2fmCY4h.jpg)

I don't understand why we should ignore woke homophobia. My life doesn't revolve around straight people who were never supportive in the first place. I'm not staying in a toxic social alliance and ignoring homophobia just to have woke points.

No. 174563

There is a strong number amongst gay men that specifically want to sleep with straight men but yeah, largely I agree.

No. 174567

From experience more people disagree with this stuff than they let on but they don’t speak up because they don’t want to get attacked over it

No. 174573

I think most sane people think "If someone doesn't want to fuck/date you move on" but that means you're transphobic now. It's the same shitty argument the body positivity people made "You not wanting to fuck an obese person is fatphobic. Fuck them until you like it." Yes they said that and it sounds ridiculous. So why do they think this argument works just because the topic is trans people.

No. 174590

>Normies do not see a difference between a lesbian, gay man or a troon.

Wtf they absolutely do. A lot of straight people like opposite sex homosexuals (well fetishize them or want a gay bff) but dislike homosexuals of same sex. And even my ultranormie dad knows gays and trans apart. (His opinion on trannies is "cant they just be gay?" though.) LGB people arent denying basic biology and demanding everyone to play along, calling you a nazi for using wrong pronouns or not dating them, spending your tax money on hormones and plastic surgery.

No. 174599

File: 1615250933736.gif (495.95 KB, 320x240, tumblr_mjyzt6VEb81s6vvcuo1_400…)

Monday night, getting drunk and watching Strawberry Panic. Yeah I know its scrote shit but I'm lonely and a weeb. Haven't watched this shit since middle school so kind of excited to see how much my taste has changed.

No. 174601

>you really think this has nothing to do with you and after dropping the T we are going to enter gay utopia?
No but we’ll have our community to ourselves again and that will be a big improvement

No. 174602

>we’ll have our community to ourselves again and that will be a big improvement

I'm afraid that will never happen again due to the huge amount of gay trans men (codeword straight women) and transbians.

No. 174606

File: 1615253894139.jpg (20.16 KB, 300x225, spica-171.jpg)

That was the first yuri anime I ever saw. I hate the main couple too much to rewatch lol but Amane is still waifu material.

No. 174635

wow, this character is very cute…

No. 174660

File: 1615302365299.jpeg (841.52 KB, 1200x1405, 69DF1BC2-5A3A-4A29-BCB4-C899ED…)

Anons, do you believe in love at first sight? Somehow I instantly knew that my GF was the one— or at least she immediately piqued my interest. I couldn't stop thinking of her and made any excuse to talk with her. Of course, after getting to know her I've come to love her even more, so much that the initial spark can't even compare. But I do believe it was love at first sight.

No. 174688

I honestly don't understand why so many anons care about scrotes and what is pandering to them and what's not. If you enjoy some piece of lesbian media shitty or not then just enjoy it and if you don't then don't? why let scrotes live rent free in your mind?

No. 174719

> I think anons forget that some of these "scrote pandering" shows also have female writers behind them. Some people think that disliking something only because a certain group likes makes their taste better (it really doesn't).

No. 174747

>(it really doesn't)
Why do I get the feeling that you think coomershit is a high work of art and everyone else has "shit taste"

No. 174758

No, I just think that type of argument is as shallow as the notion popular/mainstream is automatically vapid and inferior to "high art".

It's also naive to think that coomers can't like something that isn't even trying to appeal to them and base your in relation to theirs. The whole point of them being coomers is that they sexualize everything. I'm not going to stop liking something just because they do too.

No. 174761

It's one of those things where I'm not opposed to believing it, but I'll only say I believe it when I actually experience it. Happy for you, though!

No. 174791

File: 1615388483275.jpg (17.59 KB, 446x377, EmXPBzXUYAEJC_B.jpg)

This is really sweet and I really wish to experience it . Idk about love at first sight thing though, I more believe in a spark at first conversation
>Somehow I instantly knew that my GF was the one— or at least she immediately piqued my interest
But maybe the red thread of fate is real though.
This will sound stupid, but I know my soulmate exists. I don't know if I will ever meet her but I know she is somewhere there and I am pretty sure she is aware of me.

No. 174804

Really sad that r/superlesbians was banned too. It was actually a really nice community, they had already started non-troon related discussions and sub in general felt cozy. Wanted to visit it today and the ban kind of ruined my morning. Oh well, men really hate lesbians

No. 174819

Orange is the New Black

No. 174824

Did they ban the straight one too?

No. 174828

nta but yes

No. 174849

i just want gf. ok not just any gf. her.

No. 174857

I love tomboys/butch/masc/androgynous women so much. Undercuts and alternative fashion are huge pluses but teeters into weirdo territory pretty fast. Someone who's active and will indulge my impulsive need to go on long walks and maybe take a trip out to go hiking or camping. I love women who are taller than me but it's not that hard since I'm short lol.

I like to dress really feminine and "proper" (e.g. long skirts/dresses) and like the contrast of alternative vs traditional fashions. I feel like liking more butch women while being femme plays into traditional gender roles, it doesn't look the best on me as someone who thought she was bi for most of my life but I like what I like (and it definitely is not men).

No. 175022

Went on a date last night after talking to a girl online for a bit.
I'm falling so fucking hard for her it hurts.
She's way out of my league. Charismatic, talented, experienced a lot in life… And I'm just some socialy awkward autist. I'm already afraid I screwed up yesterday, I know I'm overthinking it, but oh my god, this woman is amazing, it's intimidating. I couldn't even sleep at all last night, I just want to see her again.
Ugggh please give me advice on how to be more confident. I've never actually dated before.

No. 175030

Good for you! Even if it leads nowhere, you will still gain experience and some confidence from finally being on a date! Does she know you are inexperienced? If so, she probably expects you to be awkward. Also have you talked after the date?

No. 175099

Just popping in to say that if any of you are looking for lesbian spaces online, I've been lurking r/latebloomerlesbians on reddit for a few days now and it seems to be pretty void of girldick uwu troons. It's full of women that are married with kids and have no intention of leaving their husbands but while it's sad, at least they're not obnoxious. Seems like a chill sub for actual lesbians.

No. 175101

I feel like I've trapped myself in the closet. I'm in my 30s now but spent my early to mid twenties dating men because I don't know how my family will react to me dating anyone else. I have a dad who still somehow puts fear into me even though I rarely visit him. That's just the dynamic he set up. I'm scared to tell him about other aspects of my life too but this is the big one.

Both my relationships were sexless/near sexless disasters where I basically brought trauma on myself by staying in such unhealthy dynamics where the guys resented the lack of sex so raged out at me, or they forced sex on me. I blamed myself for their raging and their abuse because 'well I shouldn't be dating men' The funniest part is I had moments in each relationship where I blatently stated that I was gay and that didn't even end things or concern them? I played that out twice and then I just up and moved to the far end of my country to either be forever single or to have the chance to secretly date women if I want to. I've never come out to any family members and I feel stuck now because those relationships will only be used to discredit my gayness. I played myself.

I haven't had sex with a woman in ten years, I chose a really poor path. I could've just kept secret gfs that whole time (or stayed single) and avoided the insane amount of pain I went through.

No. 175109

This seriously sounds like a joke. That sub only makes me depressed because those women call themselves lesbians and in the same breath talk about how their husbands are the love of their lives and soulmates. Ew. While there are several lesbians that have come out, the majority are middle-aged women that spend all their free time on reddit and twitter, so they think liking She-ra makes them lesbian or something
>pretty void of girldick uwu troons
True, so I guess it is one of the best spaces for lesbians on reddit. Only you need a lot of patience for all the married women.
Anyways, I love saidit.net Lesbian sub, only it is really slow and has small amount of members. It was created after truelesbians were termed.

No. 175110

I mean I agree, but I find it way easier to ignore the married women as opposed to ignoring troons. I've yet to find a lesbian space online that's not infiltrated by troons and/or straight/bi/questioning women to at least some degree.
I'll check out the site you mentioned, thanks for the rec!

No. 175123

That sub is "My husband is bad at sex, am I gay?", it's bi women in denial at best.

No. 175127

I got married in my early twenties back when I was hoping to just supress that shit. The marriage lasted all of two years as we never even consummated it so one day he snapped and broke free of our non-relationship. So I can understand covering shit up but how do you cover it up THAT well and partake in a lesbian space all with no intent of actually leaving him?

It's like when 'proud asexual' women have marriages with regular sexual relations for the mans sake…like get out of there. Sex you don't truly want will fuck you up for years to come. Are we normalising that?

No. 175240

I used to think me seeing women as more beautiful than men had to do with men being utter slobs.
asexual has lost it's meaning. It used to people who didn't have any desire for sex. Now it's anyone who isn't a coomer. I blame the media for painting out the general public as sex-obsessed when most people aren't. This wouldn't be such a big deal if so many straight people who aren't asexual didn't keep using asexuality as an excuse act up.

No. 175259

It is true though, men are less attractive than women on average, which makes everything even more confusing.
For me it was understanding the difference between seeing an attractive woman and attractive man. For women I have instant pull, sometimes it is sexual and sometimes it is straight up thirst for men - I can look at them and anything beyond 'huh, nice' has to be consciously created in my mind. If we went by the everyone is bisexual ideology, then I would say my attraction to men is a lot more cerebral and has to be actively created and maintained by my mind.

No. 175270

Every time I go and get coffee, I feel nervous thinking about the cute girls there. Before covid I would frequent cafes and chill there with a book or my laptop, I would dress up a little bit but I was too autistic to engage with other people. I was pretty much a "regular" and there was one barista who I had a few good interactions with. She remembered my name and was really nice to me. I complimented her glasses and I think that was the most bold move I made. Later found out she was engaged to a man, ofc every girl I've had a crush on is in a committed, straight relationship. I just want a cute barista gf

No. 175367

She is aware, so hopefully whatever (probably weird) first impression I made can be made better over time. I'm the kind of person who has to warm up to people.
I'm seeing her again this week, I'm so excited but still nervous. At least now the initial first meeting is out of the way.

No. 175375

Anyone struggling with confidence when it comes to women? Men are of course horrid I'm not surprised when they like me but women? I can't imagine a confident lesbian woman liking me, I don't look very lesbian and I'm not super up there in looks but I think it might just be because of how gorgeous women are?

No. 175380

I struggle with it too. Granted, I always had issues with self-image. Now generally I have more motivation to look after myself be it through fitness or my clothing because I want women to find me attractive. I still think that no well-adjusted lesbian will like me, but a lot of it comes from not knowing what women actually like…like wtf do I do with my personality, idk. It is easier to know what to do to attract men and what they like. It doesn't help that a lot of lesbian spaces on the internet have very idealistic and skewed perceptions of f/f relationships because of lack of experience (the ~~uwuuu women are perfect and gorgeous queens and lesbians never argue and have perfect sex~~ crowd)

No. 175447

File: 1615893274322.png (1.59 MB, 949x858, F2D65898-8576-47B6-8A3A-BB1754…)

I believe in you! One day soon you'll live in the Coffee Shop AU version of your life.

No. 175708

i dunno if i'm posting in the right thread or not considering i'm questioning if i'm a lesbian but still like 80% sure of it. so i'm 19 and i've dated probably like 7 guys. none of them i've been happy with. i've talked to guys as well and hooked up and whatever but genuinely never felt anything, i felt uncomfortable and i always get this feeling of like .. just aching in my stomach. i feel like i'm being forced to do something i genuinely have no interest in. i only like guys when they play ''hard to get'' but as soon as i get them, they're out and i feel disgusted by them. i can't fathom being in a relationship with a man and i've always been more attracted to women and the concept of dating a woman, but i've been repressing it in a form of internalized lesbophobia because while i didn't grow up religious or anything, i just feel ashamed. i won't be able to bond with my girlfriends with 'boy talk'' or whatever and i feel like i might lose a lot of friends when we sort of lose that grasp of bonding in the form of ''boy talk'' it sounds genuinely stupid but i'm just scared that people might not be accepting. i'm just so confused because i've heard of comphet and stuff but i've only slightly considered myself to be lesbian, i'll see myself as lesbian one day and bisexual with a strong female lean the other day. i just don't know what to do because another guy is interested in me but i just can't provide to that, this is all so much to process and even though i'm an adult granted, i just turned 19 last month i still feel fucking scared. like i'm supposed to know what to do, i'm supposed to know how to handle this but i just can't. i just fucking don't know what to do. sorry for sperging and kind of a blogpost, i don't know anyone who's felt this way before so any reply, like literally any reply is appreciated.

No. 175741

> i've been repressing it in a form of internalized lesbophobia because while i didn't grow up religious or anything, i just feel ashamed
Yeah, I understand - was always accepting of gays until started to think that I may be one of them. It is harder, because now you will have to experience all the negative parts of being homosexual too, not just the fandom tier acceptance and fetishization
>i won't be able to bond with my girlfriends with 'boy talk''
A real fear for me too, but I am afraid I won't be able to pass as a straight woman in front of acquaintances. As far as friends go, there are het women out there that are are not men-obsessed. And yes, I think there will be people that will leave you because they can't accept your sexuality, sorry

Idk, if you don't want the guy, don't do it, really. You are only 19 and one missed dick is not going to ruin your life.
>as lesbian one day and bisexual with a strong female lean the other day.
I think the distinction doesn't matter here, if you are so much more attracted to women. Like, even if you are bi in this case you would still be happier in a relationship with a woman; a possible occasional male attraction is not going to save you.

No. 175743

File: 1616072135483.jpeg (29.92 KB, 563x387, original (3).jpeg)

thank you. like seriously thank you because i have been thinking of losing friends for being lesbian because they'll think i have a crush on them or something but i think me being happy and comfortable with my sexuality matters more than some straight girls stereotyping me and thinking i'm in love with every girl i see. i'm going to think about it for a while, but at this point i'm sure. so, so sure that i am a lesbian. and even if i'm not i still appreciate you replying and helping me out. ty anon

No. 175842

File: 1616126582049.jpeg (73.28 KB, 976x850, D062883D-B56F-4CBC-94C8-19A0E6…)

>questioning if i'm a lesbian but still like 80% sure
>i've dated probably like 7 guys

For fuck’s sake anon.

No. 176045

All my friends are the straight, "normie", slightly religious type and they've all accepted me when I came out. Best of luck to you nonnie!

No. 176082

File: 1616321337109.jpeg (916.23 KB, 1242x2016, BF4CC982-C9DE-4228-9421-65A158…)

Went to Reddit because I was curious just how bad it had gotten. Incredible

No. 176083

so if im bi and fucking men i can still call myself a lesbian? awesome, words have no meaning anymore fuck leddit

No. 176142

Any good lesbian romance novels out there? I'm lonesome and looking for something mushy.
>bitch about being lonely
All of the lesbians I meet are either fuckbois, too young, or taken.
>butch? femme? how do you feel about labels?
I've never been fully either one, my casual clothes are very butch(I have a manual labor job) but I like to dress up femme from time to time
>which lesbian stereotypes do you fit? which ones don’t fit you at all?
I have a drawer full of flannels and drive a subaru. I have a high voice and like "femme" crafts like lacemaking and sewing
>what were you like as a kid? tomboy? girly girl who made her Barbies kiss?
I ran around in the woods in boy's clothes, but also liked to wear dresses. I did make my barbies kiss and played out fantasies of them running away together to live in a cottage in the woods. I didn't really think of clothes as masculine or feminine, my parents didn't really care as long as they were clean.
>get mushy and describe your dream relationship/date/etc
My wife is tan and muscular, her breath smells like the sweet mint gum she chews while we spend the day working on our farm. We're sweaty and filthy from work and take a water break under a tree. She falls asleep on my shoulder and her hair is warm and smells like sunshine. At the end of the day we walk back to the house and eat crockpot stew while listening to folk music.

No. 176150

I love your dream relationship. You made me feel all fuzzy and warm!

No. 176270

I really don't fucking get WHY they want to be gay so bad. It come with way more drawbacks than it is worth to larp as one irl. Once you are out of your kweer safespace, people either don't care or don't want to be around you. Do those wokesters have so much social capital, that their opinions and acceptance matter so much? Do they just have a Peter Pan syndrome and don't want to grow out of their tumblr phase? I don't get it

No. 176288

Thanks anon, I hope I'll meet her one day.
This, I was an out and proud tumblry type in high school but once I went out in the working world I had to be much more cautious.
Kind of related- I hate how coming out is portrayed as this big event done once. You never stop having to come out with every new person you meet. When your co-workers talk about relationships or ask if you have a big you have to read the room every time, and usually in my case, deflect the questions if you're not sure. Sometimes you can be pleasantly surprised by acceptance but sometimes people you thought were accepting actually aren't. As an adult there are more consequences.
>I don't have time for a bf haha
>Oh I'm picky, you know how guys are
>I'm taking some time for myself before I get back out there

No. 176299

I feel so lonely. I don't know any other lesbians irl, and I'm not out due to homophobic surroundings. I think some people realize (I'm butch and also hilariously bad at pretending to not be completely disinterested in men) but everyone is polite and acts like I'm not. I had a lesbian friend online who lives half a world away and she was my everything, but we had a falling out some months ago and ever since I've been so lonely. I don't know where to find others like me. Every space is either completely political or it's filled with TRA ideology where saying you're a lesbian gets you dick pics and death threats. It's so lonely. I thought that if I focused on work and hobbies I wouldn't feel so bad about it but it affects me to the core. It feels like I'm gonna die closeted and lonely, and like lesbians around me either don't exist or somehow manage to avoid me personally. I don't want to live like this, how do you deal?

No. 176307

Date and date until you mate

No. 176329

I'm in a relationship but I think about this a lot. I'd be afraid if my fiancee died or left me somehow and I were forced to start over again. Society has gone totally batshit with TRA and other political nonsense, I can't imagine what it'd be like to date nowadays. The stuff my exes and I said and did to each other 10+ years ago would get us cancelled today.

No. 176480

I feel ya. I'm in some gay and some supposed female-only spaces but they have trannies in them and I'm not sure who else is like me but I personally pretend I'm pro-trans just to get by. It is my hope that many of us are merely pretending to humor these sick scrotes but it's frustrating as shit having our already tiny spaces invaded like this. It saddens me further that maybe someone who also hates tranny presence in our lesbian spaces thinks of me as a handmaiden just because I'm hiding my true feelings. Anyway, getting rambly. It sucks.

I don't really care if people wanna self mutilate, doesn't affect me and I'll use the pronouns regardless of context but I want my lesbian spaces back. It's too much.

No. 176482

anon be the change you want to see! i met my gf by being openly terfy

No. 176485

The risk of being shut out of my communities is too daunting for me at the moment unfortunately. The leadership in these groups happen to be very handmaidy.

No. 176739

File: 1616797860445.jpg (21.52 KB, 548x366, cbfc1bb0ff7b6634322283a6dd820c…)

I want to be the buff, protective, 6'+ tall girlfriend, but I am just a 5'4" midget. feelsbadman. I want to know what the air up there is like

No. 176768

5'4 isn't short, you're literally average height

No. 176769

Just lift and get a 5'0" gf.

No. 176776

Maybe she's nordic.

No. 176787

Trojan horse, anon. They're straight white males who got mad over being called out for being the most privileged group in the western hemisphere and saw gays gathering together to gain power. Slap on a shitty wig and change your pronouns to she/her and now you're there to drive the LGB community into licking your boots and pampering you instead of fighting for their own rights. Whether they're doing it consciously or not is up for a debate but that's basically the reason. Porn brainrot plays a role as well but without the troonism shit they would be just nasty fetlife crossdressers.

No. 176797

y'all can tell the difference between a woman with facial hair and a troon right? I’m fairly tall and usually have stubble because waxing hurts like hell. It doesn’t bother me if women find it unattractive but sometimes I get really nervous they’ll think I’m MTF and feel afraid/threatened by me. I feel like it should be obvious that I’m biologically female but the constant “IF WOMEN WITH PCOS CAN BE LESBIANS SO CAN MALES!” gets to me I guess.

No. 176805

You can still be my protective gf
t. 5'9"

No. 176808

women with pcos don't have a dick, so

No. 176809

Don't fall for the retarded "PCOS women look like men" meme, anon. If you put a tranny and a woman with PCOS next to each other you would absolutely be able to tell the difference due to facial bone structure, size of the hands, body shape, voice, the way they walk and carry themselves, etc., all of these put together, not just a few features. You still have a vagina, they don't.

No. 176818

What do you think about dating born again lesbians aka late bloomers? Would you date one/see dating them once you are older? The 40+ year old women that have several children, at least one ex husband and extensive amounts of baggage suddenly going lesbian once their white-picket fence dream has shattered rubs me the wrong way. They have spent their entire lives being with men and now that they are tired of them, suddenly other women are good enough to date and be in a relationship with. These women not only are supported on every feminist space I see, but also told that actual lesbians would looove to date them and help raise their children. And I seriously question the last part.

No. 176823

What it comes down to is very straightforward, but for some reason acts as a huge point of contention both ITT and every other LGBT community. Lesbians don't have sex with men. Simple as that. Keep in mind I'm a fairly young woman (early 20's) who has known about and accepted her attraction to women since childhood, but seriously. This is not rocket science.

Honestly, I could only believe that a late bloomer of that sort is actually a lesbian under very extreme circumstances. For example, if the marriage was forced or otherwise arranged, the husband was abusive or otherwise difficult to escape, and she lived in an extremely homophobic area all her life. Personally I can't fathom having a prolonged romantic relationship with a man, much less having sex with one (on even a single occasion!)– and God forbid I bear his children. I would rather die a loveless, KHHV than suffer that fate. And to be honest, that'd be only slightly less hellish than dating a self-proclaimed late bloomer "lesbian."

Like, God. Nobody will hate you for being bisexual, so there's no need to pretend otherwise. I wish they'd just hook up with each other and leave us out of it.

No. 176832

>I would rather die a loveless, KHHV than suffer that fate
Funny you say that, because historically many homosexuals ended up being celibate. And both Christians and Muslims kind still say stuff like
>being homosexual doesn't mean you have to act on your sinful desires, you can just dedicate your life to God

Also would love to know once and for all why so many bisexuals unashamedly call themselves lesbians while they have been with 0 women in total but have several ex-boyfriends. First cross that pussy bridge and then start calling yourself a raging gay bean

No. 176873

We can definitely tell you're not male, don't worry dog. PCOS looking like trans is just a tranny cope.

The vast majority of those closeted straight marriages have completely dead bedrooms. The children are made for the purpose of having something to pour your love into (or whatever other reason people have to spawn em, idk) but they're not like, accidents from having hella sex. But yeah the odds of a gay woman that grew up in a non-homophobic family/community that somehow ends up in a straight marriage for most of her life are very low.

No. 176897


Fuck no is your answer.

No. 176927

I wouldn't date someone with kids just because kids aren't something I want in my life. But I married a man when I was 21, spent a lovely 4 sexless years together before we split and I would of course date someone with a similar experience to that. My marriage was entirely sexless though, entirely. I would think that any woman partaking in m/f sex for years is maybe bi but I would happily date a divorced bi woman too so doesn't make much of a difference to me.

No. 176928

Not sure if I'd date one with kids but without kids, I wouldn't mind at all. I do believe a gay woman can have a ltr with a man. There are a ton of reasons a woman might feel pressured to date/fuck men, and from what I've seen latebloomers are usually women who got married and had kids really young and are then essentially trapped in a sexless relationship with a dude they only love platonically. There's often stuff like financial dependency etc that makes them stay in the relationship even years after they've realized they're actually gay.
Also, unpopular opinion here, I do think a persons sexuality can shift over time. Maybe they were bi to begin with and over time, as they get older and experience changes in hormone levels etc they find themselves more attracted to women than before. But that's just how I see it. As long as they're women in relationships with/pursuing women and they eat pussy they're gay enough for me and are allowed to call themselves lesbians, I don't have any weird hangups over them having had sex with dicks before even if I haven't.

No. 177039

No. 177350

did any other anons have a hard time coming to terms with the fact they were a lesbian? I knew when I was very young but it was beaten out of me when I first came out at 13, I was 100% convinced I was straight for years until I dated a girl as a dare and realised I'd been pretending to like males. sage in case it doesn't fit here, there are very few places for lesbians to discuss this stuff these days it seems

No. 177405

me. To the point where I just tell myself I'm asexual. Which I know is ridiculous. But living in a pornified socitey is my personal scapegoat as to why I'm attracted to women. Being a lesbian seems like it's always been bleak on this planet. Sorry for the self-homophobia anons, I'm working on it.

No. 177481

>lesbian meetup comes up in a convo with women
>cishet asks "can i come too?"
fucking.. no.

No. 177488

wow how cucked am i in masking my peak that i said cishet in the one place i can just say het. kms i want out.

No. 177493

kek it’s okay anon. Embrace normiespeak.

No. 177502

maybe she is not so het

No. 177516

She asked if straight women can come, I don't know why she'd phrase it that way if she were merely closeted.

No. 177525

My ex came out as a "femme FtM" and called me bisexual even though I am not and got pissy when I told her I was a lesbian because my sexuality is now invalidating. I don't care about what she wants to be called now but I fucked a woman not a man. It's like she wants to change my past along with her present.
I felt sorry for her fucked up upbringing and abuse and refused to allow myself to get pissed off with her but I've had enough. It's not my job to save her anymore and it's not my job to validate her. I've been waiting for her to snap out of this shit but she's only dug even deeper. I'm done.

I'm scared I'll get stuck in a victim-savior relationship again or that my next gf will troon out.

No. 177529

There’s got to be cute fluffy /lesgen/ approved GL manga right? Sorry if this has been asked before, I’m jonesing for soft love stories.

No. 177532

i kind of wish dating ftms made us truly bi in other people's eyes. it's pretty obvious from the way people talk about lesbians that they don't think we deserve respect unless we sleep with penis havers.

No. 177535

Anon your ex is terrible I'm sorry. She doesn't get to redefine your sexuality just because she can't cope with being female, that's insanely narcissistic.

>I'm scared I'll get stuck in a victim-savior relationship again or that my next gf will troon out.

I feel this so hard. I'm mainly into butch/masc women and it feels like they're all ticking timebombs now for transition. I won't date anyone who's not openly terfy.

No. 177536

There is Tamen De Gushi but it struggled with censorship because China. There's also Gentle Flutters, also by a Chinese artist but quite nice.

No. 177549

Thanks anon, I'm mostly into femmes and even then I've met a few he/him/theys with cleavage and makeup. I don't get it.
We broke up a while ago but I stayed friends with her because I still felt responsible to make sure she was okay and because I still had feelings for her , so I've been dipping in and out of the dating scene and running into the same thing. There are no real lesbian only spaces left online or off it seems. Some of my close friendships are actually with gay men, partially because they don't accept this nonsense either. We can chat without some weird tangent about validity or checks to see whether you're woke enough. Gay men get away with ignoring those types more than women. They have apps like Grindr for men only, but any women's sites have to be "queer" and accept everyone. I hate the word queer, and don't understand how quickly a reclaimed slur became a standard term.

No. 177555

Nta but you mentioned grindr which reminds me I just downloaded her dating app. It has a million gender options to choose from but no woman. Only womxn. Like enbies get their special genders but women cant just be women in lesbian dating app? Also trans man was an option, not trans mxn.

Im more masculine myself and one girl I dated said it would be "so cute" if I was a trans guy. Now Im worried I attract trans chasers when I am not even trans.

No. 177561

Me too, but it is better now than it was a couple of years ago. Still wish I was bi though and have a hope that my sexuality is just a phase that will end with the lockdown.
Wait till you get to the 'homophobic homosexual' phase, though imo I have a good reason to hate American lgbtq activists since they are setting back our rights big time

No. 177586

Nah, I’ve already gone through that phase when I first realized my homosexuality. It was mostly out of envy though. thanks for responding.

No. 177589

What aspects of the gay(males) community do you wish we could steal and incorporate into the lesbian community. What aspects are you glad we don’t share with the gay community?

No. 177598

the "token gay male friend" trope

No. 177615

Check out Ring My Bell

No. 177623

kweer people seem to expect gay men to cater to everyone less than lesbians, so that

No. 177654

I'm sorry you went through that. Someone trying to redefine my sexuality because they started calling themselves a boy would piss me off so damn much. I'm not usually open about how TERFy I am (except around my gf, since she is too) but I'd get a lot more open very quickly if someone tried to convince me that I'm "bisexual" because I'm into soft butch tomboys who also might someday think of themselves as dudes.

We're not attracted to "gender identities" or the fantasy roleplay alter-egos that some people hold in their heads, we're attracted to the physical reality.

I swear I'm not some kind of lesbian fuckboy (fuckboi?) but I fantasize about a lesbian hookup culture more like what gay dudes have. Lez bathhouses and the like. I'm sure IRL it's actually pretty loveless to go around screwing random strangers but hey, it's a fantasy. Besides, if something like this existed IRL it would be colonized by gurldick in less than a week, ugh.

No. 177656

I want there to be lesbian hookup culture only so that my status as a virgin can end before it gets embarrassing.

No. 177698


Bicurious/straight leaning bi women seem to be looking for hookups a lot. Why not try them if just sex is what both want? (I hope this doesnt start les vs bi infighting again.)

No. 177701

You're lucky to be a virgin, no matter how old you are. It gives you the chance to experience your first time with someone you really love who loves you in return. Sex is not something you have to try just to get it over with and join the sex-havers club. Look at the "losing virginity" thread on here. So many Anons feel disappointed in themselves for being impatient, getting pressured into it, going for hookups, etc.

I never intended to wait till marriage and I don't care for the "purity" narrative, but I feel enourmously lucky that my first time will be with my fiancee who loves me so much. (Honestly, we'll probably bang before the wedding, but I digress.)

No. 177709

Not that anon, but I observed that women tend to look for someone with experience. So many women I talked to straight up consider it "sus" or weird if you're a virgin/don't have enough sexual experience past the age of 20.

No. 177719

sperg but why are all lesbians fucking ugly? feminine lesbo here who specifically likes very feminine, soft looking pretty girls, but all the girls on dating apps and the such are so… ugly. on top of the fact they're all hyper-woke, vegan and holier-than-thou. or trannies

terf anon how did you find your gf

No. 177724

>asking terfs where to find women that blindly follow patriarchal beauty standards

oh the irony

No. 177726

Are you sure you not just very picky? I see conventionally attractive femmes on dating apps all the time.
t. ugly fuck

No. 177727

go outside then narc chan

No. 177728

Not saying you think like this or pointing any fingers at you Anon, but that just seems so shallow to me. I can understand some suspicion if all your past sexual experiences were with moids and now you suddenly want a taste of pussy before heading back to Scroteland… But virginity is seen as a red flag too? Is it based on the assumption that a lack of romantic/sexual experience means you've got some fatal, undateable flaw? I just can't understand that, especially since society is so homophobic and many lesbians grow up closeted. I wish we wouldn't hold ourselves to such standards. It's like we can't win no matter what.

No. 177731

Oh no, I don't share that opinion at all, and I agree it sounds very shallow. Just reporting what I've heard from lesbians around me and on different online communities. I wouldn't be prejudiced against a virgin and I'm sure there are others who think the same way, but I've heard that prejudice from normie lesbians in a particular way.

No. 177737

Anyone in here struggle with giving a shit about relationships? I always read internet lesbians whinging about not being able to find a girl and I wonder how much of that is just not trying? I know I'm not trying and can honestly say my "not giving a shit" is more a fear of intimacy at this point lmfao. Anyway I'm lonely too but seeing as its self imposed loneliness I feel like I should suck it up, since I don't actually want/actively sabotage relationships when they potentially pop up.

No. 177738

No. 177742

Once you’re about 21 people really expect you to have lost your virginity except men fetishise it so it’s not a problem for women who do fuck men. I lost mine at 21 from a girl hookup and can remember just feeling so relieved.

No. 177751

i've only ever met narc bis who misidentify and think they're hot shit among lesbians because they're "so much more feminine" even though they're completely average and expect their partner to look like 90lb hyperfemme plastic surgery popstars. try not to project whatever damage you have with yourself onto lesbians. it's offputting. if you can't find your preference then date bisexuals or move because hyper-woke vegans is a location issue, not a lesbian one

No. 177752

wasn't gonna comment on the obvious bibait but this.

No. 177767

Damn are you me?

No. 177769

Have you been single for five years and cringe at the idea of sharing your feelings with anyone besides total strangers on the internet?

No. 177772

Pretty much yeah.

No. 177774

Going into lesbian thread and starting off with the
>why are all lesbians fucking ugly
and thinking you will find support here was really not the brightest decision. Hope you are pretty enough to offset that retardation

No. 177778

starting to think most terfs on here are just libfems who draw the line at sex work, but still depend on increasing their attractiveness to solidify their value and pull that "makeup is fun, being feminine is fun and just for meeee" bs

No. 177785

does anyone else feel uncomfortable with the way people seem to shit on women who haven't slept with men (not going to unironically use the term goldstar because i don't want this to devolve into wank) at any opportunity? if there's ever any post criticising certain lesbians someone almost immediately brings it up even if the original topic is entirely different. GOLDSTAR SUPREMACISTS, SLIPPERY SLOPE TO GOLDSTAR LESBIANISM etc. as if it's some ideology. is only having fucked women really so terrible that people deserve to be constantly snidely shit on for it?

>inb4 goldstar supremacist

no, i'm not one, i've fucked men. it's still disturbing behaviour.

No. 177787

Is there a good app or site to find mainly online/distance relationships that's relatively troon free?
I'm afraid of intimacy so I though maybe starting something purely online could help me get past that.

No. 177789

In the kindest way possible, go outside.

No. 177792

don't dating apps have something akin to an elo score system? if you're getting matched with uggos then.. sorry anon

No. 177794

Don't fret anon, probably an internet thing.

No. 177799

Good advice. I'm not really looking for hookups rn because I'm not single, but I have nothing against bi women either. (Current gf is bi.) I did hook up with several bicurious mostly-straight women when I was younger, all fun and good times.

Now, I would absolutely hesitate to hook up with a bi woman who's currently involved with a dude somehow, because you just know he's going to try to butt in at some point, even if she swears he'll stay far away and is cool with her exploring herself and so on. Seems like a number of women on dating apps are like this; they're not openly unicorn-hunting but they're not 100% single either.

TERF anon here, I met my gf at an anime convention. kek I'm also not up to your soft-pretty-femme standards, though my gf might be. TBH I peaked because I look so butch/dykey that I got constantly mistaken for a fakeboi, saw lots of butch acquaintances troon out, and it got to me.

No. 177825

That's fair.

No. 177844

Madonna's arms in this are doing things to me omfg

No. 178007

Absolutely based post. Tired of these coomers thinking they're entitled to the lesbian fantasy gf who looks like a breathtaking porn star or a runway model simply because they're "femme and not ugly" themselves.

It's called the useless lesbian syndrome. Lesbian women know how scrotes creep on women and how awful it is, so they're scared of being the predatory homosexual. After you've grown up in an environment that doesn't encourage same sex romance and fetishizes lesbian relationships to exist only for sexualization purposes it's hard to care about having relationships. Also because a lot of us didn't have the chance to explore the romantic and sexual side of our personalities during our teens for obvious reasons we never got to find out our needs and develop the necessary skills for relationships.

No. 178028

Oh I thought the trope was “whaaa idk how to talk to women and initiate romance” nvm that’s what you said.

No. 178094

Imo it is just a one facet of a bigger problem - lesbian spaces being overrun by political lesbians. Also would explain why comphet is so popular, since you can claim that you had relationships with men because of le ebil society and not because you willingly engaged with them. Gold stars disprove the argument that every single woman is violently pushed into het relationships (and women have no choice but to submit to the pressure), which makes polilezzies seethe since we are ruining their larp.
If you look at the ones that are mad at gold stars, it is never lesbians that had sex with a man once/women with actual gay experience, it is always women with an extensive history of dating men that now want to retcon their lives

No. 178104

Agree with this. However comphet is undeniably a real thing, but I think it's more like "I thought I had no sex drive or there was something wrong with me as a heterosexual because I wasn't able to find men attractive, then I realized I was just gay" a la celibate nuns and not "I had multiple long-lasting, fulfilling heterosexual relationships and then poof suddenly I realized I'm a lesbian in my late 20s! #JustCompHetThings!". I think your ship on blaming comphet sailed a long ago, it's okay to just be bi for crying out loud.

No. 178110

comphet turning into this mystical term is weird. fuck the lesbian masterdoc or whatever it is. women need to actually read Adrienne Rich's Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence. It's only around 20 pages ffs.

No. 178113

No. 178138

File: 1617735470864.png (127.29 KB, 453x506, compulsory heterosexuality and…)

Wasn't Rich one of the feminist activists that basically invented political lesbianism? And comphet is a polilez term? Therefore women need to actually read the work and educate themselves on what comphet actually is? I don't understand what you meant exactly.
Picrel quotes from the pdf, where Rich implies that being a lesbian is a political action and more of a refusal to marry than inherent sexual orientation. Associating lesbianism with political choice and movement opens a whole new world of spergs that inhabit lesbian spaces

No. 178139

Thank you for putting into words what's been frustrating me for quite some time. The thought of being with men has always been disgusting and unnatural to me even in a straight, strongly religious environment.

No. 178149

Agree with this 100%. For me, comphet was about having "crushes" on fictional anime bishounen or otherwise unobtainable male pop idols. (Bonus points: I got to gossip about these guys with the girls I had actual crushes on.) As a teen I concluded that I was asexual because all IRL men were beyond revolting to me, with the purely theoretical exception of certain androgynous-looking celebs who were safely out of my league anyway. I never felt compelled to date or sleep with a guy at any point.

I've got nothing against bisexual women, and I'm not going to take away someone's gay card if they tried dick a couple times just to make sure they really hated it, but JFC you're not a lesbian if you've got a string of ex-boyfriends.

I think some of the anti-gold-stars are bi women who have sworn off dating men due to multiple bad experiences; they might even prefer women, but that doesn't erase their past history of apparently finding men attractive enough to date and sleep with multiple dudes.

No. 178161

yea women should be aware of it's polilez association and usage for all women not just lesbians, so lesbians can find a term to describe their experience without all the baggage. Ignoring the polilez stuff I thought it was a good essay how women are pressured into dating men.

No. 178166

idk i thought csa made me gay and if i have sex with a man that will turn me straight? like i thought that just because i masturbate to women that doesn't mean i am actually sexually attracted to women, that it is common in straight women and just a trauma response that will go away when i have a positive sexual experioence with a male. that didn't happen but that's how i ended up not being goldstar, it's kind of dumb in retrospect.

No. 178235

This is probably gonna get me banned for blog but but I need advice. How do I get my mom to accept that I'm not going to ever have grandkids? I came out to her as a lesbian when I was about fifteen and she's been telling me to "try to have an open mind when it comes to men for her sake" ever sense. She doesn't mind my female celebrity crushes or my wiseacre misandristic remarks I make from time to time but whenever I vent about my experiences as a woman who isn't into men she starts acting weird. I've got a lot of straight girl friends and a lot of the time I feel like I don't fit in with them because they've all got boyfriends. All the time I end up fading into the background when they talk about the guys their seeing and the guys they wish they were seeing, it's isolating as hell and it makes me feel awkward about myself but there's nothing outright wrong with it so it would be irrational to ask them to shut up about it so what else can I do but vent about it in private? Or sometimes I feel like the reason I'm so lonely is because I refuse to date a bisexual woman, not because they're "tainted by men" or whatever. I've been put through a lot of traumatic experiences by men who try to challenge me based on my lack of interest in dick and I can't imagine myself connecting with anybody who doesn't know what its like which obviously someone who's bisexual never could.

But she just starts playing with her hair and avoids looking me in my eyes while she tells me "Oh, well couldn't you just play along just to humor them or something? What about so-and-so from that show you like, you gotta admit he's really handsome" or "They like girls too so they're still discriminated against, there isn't anything wrong with being attracted to men". It's like she's trying to sell me this diet brand of homosexuality so that she can continue her bloodline. I have no doubt that's what this whole thing is all about. Most of the time she's more than accepting of my lesbianism if not downright happy. She's been post-menopausal for quite some time and she's talked to me about how she's realized what shitheads men are since she's lost her sex drive so she's glad I don't date them. Its an old straight lady way of looking at it but hey, at least she likes it! Aside from this one thing. "Maybe you end up with a girl, maybe you end up with a guy" and "if you decide to find a man and settle down and make some babies", she's always saying shit like that. If she knew about some of the things that have happened to me by guys who ALSO thought I should be more open-minded she would probably stop right away but those things involve some pretty credible anonymous rape threats, groping, and being flooded with, like, a thousand unsolicited dick pics all at once (that last one at the tender age of 14 all from boys I went to school with I might add). Its an uncomfortable topic and I've only ever told my ex girlfriend about it whose reaction was surprisingly less than compassionate so I'd probably have quite a bit of trouble going over that again.

I've been staying with her until I get back on my feet for almost two years now and with all the COVID bullshit going on I don't see myself moving out for awhile so I really want to fix this. I'm growing increasingly and increasingly more uncomfortable with her bringing up the prospect of me "settling down", even unprompted. It isn't just that though. As pathetic as it sounds she's one of my best friends and I want her to fully accept who I am. What do I do?

No. 178276

You accept your mom is a lesbophobe like 90% of straight women and learn to compartmentalize? I can imagine it's hard living with her but just avoid the topic. It makes her uncomfortable and her discomfort hurts you (rightfully so, it sucks). My mom "fully accepted" me when I came out at 17 but I can see her almost cringe when she makes the mistake about asking after my personal/romantic life. It lead to me keeping almost every gf a secret from her and never getting more than a brief talk and awkward back patting after a break up. Find comfort and support for this part of yourself elsewhere, confronting or brow beating homophobes doesn't make them see the error of their ways it just makes them more defensive and uncomfortable.

No. 178371

File: 1617845474144.jpg (521.82 KB, 1125x1613, 1617844402464.jpg)

so what's the verdict. real or fake? also


No. 178373

scrote larp. no woman types like this

No. 178379

Fake, even a bishit wouldn't post something like this on r/actuallesbians. I hope, anyway.

No. 178403


>"when my hormones got the best of me"

anon's right, that's a dude larping.

No. 178426

this is 10000% a gay man(transbian)

No. 178481

File: 1617911678882.jpg (Spoiler Image, 388.42 KB, 1280x1330, 3EgxT3Z.jpg)

i want what they have

No. 178508

File: 1617917849734.jpg (82.15 KB, 1000x1000, EIQH190XYAA-U_E.jpg)

That's pretty hot, good taste anon

No. 178565

bro just give me boob already. I am begging you.

Do you guys think after the lockdown era they'll be a lot more meetups and efforts for us to get together?

No. 178566

esltard there'll*

No. 178573

Quite pessimistic, but - it either won't change or everyone will become even more autistic and reclusive. Might be my country's culture, but after the first lockdown I didn't see any changes in the amount and type of events organized (I'm talking generally, not lgb-related)
I also think that lesbians aren't actually motivated to create lesbian-only events and spaces. On average, lesbians are content with sharing everything with the lgbt community and being ~inclusive~. Even if you think that there are many secret terfs out there, they are just that - secret and silent, while still engaging with tras on main

No. 178591

Yeah your take is realistic. Majority like to pander. I kind of hoped during quarantine a number of them peaked and wanted to focus on themselves for a change.

No. 178595

>I also think that lesbians aren't actually motivated to create lesbian-only events and spaces.
problem is that they get invaded by troons immediately. nobody wants to suck girldiqué but you aren't allowed to be vocal about it so you just keep quiet and to yourself instead of dealing with harassment for being an evil terf.

No. 178597


No. 178800

File: 1618067440553.jpg (44.84 KB, 500x541, DL_GKq5UEAEopbJ.jpg)

Anyone feel kind of scrotish in their dating and attraction habits sometimes? I always used to shit on scrotes for only befriending women with relationship/sex on the mind but I recently fell for a really good friend of mine. We were getting super close and I thought I had a chance until I learned she was in a relationship of 5, almost 6 years with another woman. They're basically a forever couple and it drives me insane talking to her and dreaming of what they have so I've been trying to keep my distance. I feel just a little gross knowing she probably is really concerned about our friendship imploding but it's really because I can't stop the gay thoughts. Sucks.

Women I get along with perfectly are so rare AND she's gay but she'll never be single. Feels sad man. I feel like a dumbass incel just typing this, but I really hope one day I can get over her in a romantic sense and just be genuine friends with her.

No. 178841

File: 1618083974203.jpg (45.05 KB, 736x736, h9udaQm.jpg)

i'm so sorry you're going through this, sister. i get it though. when i meet a girl and i really vibe with her there's always this thought in the back of my head like what if she's the one? like you just never know when you'll find someone so just considering it instead of being a useless lesbian 24/7 is a good thing.

just remember that it's okay to have crushes and, no matter what you do, you will never be as despicable as a scrote.

No. 178856

File: 1618086960803.png (51.31 KB, 694x581, ovarit.PNG)

>you just keep quiet and to yourself
I would have agreed with you a while ago but then I noticed how many lesbians are vocally pro-trans and how trigger-happy they are to harass another woman for thoughtcrimes. There is a difference between keeping quiet to avoid confrontation and crying TWAW and many are in the second camp. So,
> they get invaded by troons immediately
because many women are happy to invite these ~poor, oppressed uwu~ troons themselves. Yes, nobody wants to suck girldick, but that doesn't stop TRA's from going full troon-train. Case in point - MichFest, that many radfems love to talk about as some Promised Land, has always been open to trannies, it's just TRA's are retarded enough to not do any research and just jump on one event where TIM was ejected from festival in 1991.
Img not related, but just another example

No. 178886

Why some wlws (esp form US) express interest in Russian/Eastern euro women? It is something I have noticed several times on the web. I have even seen
>I would not date a white woman, except if she is Russian
I get it when men say that, but why women?

No. 178887

Where did you see this? I can't think of any good reason. Maybe they think we need saving? Anyway if anyone needs a eastern euwuropean gf i'm here nonnetes.

No. 178890

I've seen it in passing on lc, the greentext in question is from lsa, here and there on tumblr. There are no overt displays of simping kek but it is something that sometimes happens. And more often that with other white ethnicities. Just came into my mind in passing. So maybe someone could answer, if they know it personally. If you don't notice it, it's ok, maybe it is just wishful thinking that we have a big appeal in lesbian world lol

No. 178896

Hoping it's not for predatory reasons US men seek Eastern European women; maybe it could be a belief if you're a lesbian from a known homophobic country you really MEAN it, not just claim to be a lesbian because it's trendy? IDK.

No. 178905

I try not to fetishize and be gross about it but I'm definitely into (my idea of, which I admit might be off base) Eastern European women. For me they just seem a lot less likely to be retarded about troon and libfem shit, since they grew up in a more misogynistic society. And less "spoiled", I'm a poorfag and I get along a lot better with the immigrants at work, they're a lot less whiny and consumerist than poor people from my country.

also I think early exposure to tatu had something to do with it, Russian accents drive me wild

No. 178924

Idk you guys seem less meek in posture. But that’s a generalization hehe.

No. 179344

File: 1618344104363.png (55.2 KB, 300x262, 3D2F720E-C498-4F90-93BD-BC188E…)

How do I cope that I’ll most likely end up with a girl who likes dick? It’s such a turn off but most girls who are into girls are bisexual or pozzed trans-inclusive queer types. The only ones that I know who aren’t accepting of dick in their lives are butch and I’m just super not into that.

No. 179353

Why is it a turn-off?

No. 179368

goldstar lesbians still exist, but yeah
speaking from experience you will need to date/hook-up with a few bi women in your life before finding a goldstar. bi women are a lot easier to find and date, so I'd say as long as you don't get invested with them you can gain some experience until you meet the woman you want.

No. 179373

Maybe irrelevant (not bragging or anything), but I'm a goldstar and looks-wise am kind of like an average college girl. So maybe not a lot, but there are women like that out there that are not butches

No. 179380

this is some redpill tier shit, like sleeping with "whores" until you find your traditional waifu. do you not realize you're being contaminated by dick that way?

No. 179407

File: 1618355819801.png (112.34 KB, 840x856, FT_19.06.18_Bisexuals_About-ni…)

>this is some redpill tier shit, like sleeping with "whores" until you find your traditional waifu.
it is what it is nonnie. most bisexuals do not end up marrying the same sex, so you might as well keep things casual instead of getting invested in someone who's gonna leave you for a man anyways.
>do you not realize you're being contaminated by dick that way?
I was simply offering her solutions. I've dated bi women before, so I'm not really hung up on the purity thing she is.

No. 179492

I came out to my Turkish, Islamic mom and she accepted me. I can't stop crying anons, all my emotions came out and I am so relieved. She responded very normally and rational. She said if I get a gf she would love to meet her.

No. 179498

So, so happy for you, anon!!! Better days are ahead!

No. 179499

Thank you so much. It does feel weird, like I feel sorry for her or guilty that I'm a lesbian… But, I know that she loves me unconditionally.

No. 179518

Yaaaaay, I'm so happy for you!! I wish I could hug you through the screen.

No. 179531

>lesbians are just scrotes in women's bodies

were the radfems right?

No. 179549

Just keep going, it's high time lc lesbians get redpilled on what radfems actually think of them

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