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/g/ - girl talk

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Hellweek begins Sunday, April 5th

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No. 134794

No, he's not stupid, he just doesn't give a fuck.

Old thread:

No. 134797

>No, he's not stupid, he just doesn't give a fuck.
thank you, op. it's true, in my case and so many others.

No. 134807

I'd like some advice. I'm a cishet who's almost exclusively dated straight guys. I found my dream man and he's bi. We've been going out for a few months now. He's everything I've always wanted in a partner. But he's almost exclusively dated men and I have a weird hangup about it that I'm having a hard time kicking. He deserves a partner that doesn't have this hangup. I'm trying to work through it. Sometimes when I go down on him, I think "a dicks been here" and other weird shit like that. Why am I like this and how do I stop being like this? I feel like there's a part of his body that I can never satisfy, despite him telling me unprovoked how much better I am in every way compared to all of his previous partners

No. 134815

is it a hangup or is it kind of just a reasonable thing to worry and think about

No. 134816

i wouldn't think that way, you're overthinking in my opinion. you can literally think this way about anyone you date. they are exes for a reason and he is with you for a reason. unless your hang up is being grossed out by gay sex, you just need to be more confident. bi dudes are great because you can fuck their ass and reap the benefit of seeing a guy in a really vulnerable state, but it's not with a real part of your body so it's not dirty. just buy a strap on.

No. 134818

> He deserves a partner that doesn't have this hangup

I mean if you can consider that 'a hangup' then it's a hangup that an awful lot of women share too. I would think most women.

Even if you two don't work out.. this is something he'll have to face any time he approaches datng a woman.

No. 134819

Maybe most women on this site, but most women aren't homophobic.

No. 134823

I think youre being honest and trying to work through this. I've had similar thoughts when being with a bi guy and it made me question if I'm homophobic. I knew the guy had been with girls and stuck his dick in their holes so why should I care if its a man he's fucked as well? I think it's normal for all us at times to feel insecure about previous exes, everyone is different and has something different to offer. If your bf says he prefers you you either have to believe him or you don't and it might ruin things.

I can understand if he's only dated guys it makes you hesitant because guys and girls are actually different. Just don't apply any other pressure to your relationship for time being and feel put if you trust him or not because that's what it comes down.

No. 134825

> but most women aren't homophobic

I think it's more complicated than biphobia or homophobia though, it's like having a flat chest and hearing about all the large breasted women that a guy dated before you… women worry about being enough to keep a guy sexually fulfilled and faithful long term.

No. 134830

You're not homophobic for not wanting to be with a guy who likes dick up his ass. There's a difference between not liking gay people in general and just not wanting to be part of gay men sex. I couldn't be with a bi guy, some women can, but if you also can't that's certainly not your fault or a reason to beat yourself up.

No. 134838

Yeah you didn't mention what his role was with his previous partners, did he ever bottom? Is that something he wants and would struggle without? Is it something you'd be into or is that type of play a no-go for you?

No. 134855

Anons, I'm genuinely cringeing as I type this because I'm fully aware of how pathetic this is but I can't stop feeling unnecessarily jealous over my boyfriend's exes. I don't have any logical reason to be jealous, he loves me, we have been together a year and he has only ever mentioned them in passing if it was relevant to the conversation, and never in a wistful way, but I've done the girl thing and facebook stalked some of them and they're all thinner and prettier than me. It's making me go slightly crazy because now I can't stop worrying about whether sometimes he wishes he was back with one of them. He has literally done nothing wrong here, I know this is very much a me issue, but do you guys have any advice on shutting these thoughts out?

No. 134857

Think of the ex as similar to you rather than competition. It's not like guys date in a wildly varying group of women; essentially you have the same /10 score as they do and you are just more critical of yourself than you would be of other women. Also, importantly, it's over, so it's just strange girls living their lives who probably don't have a passing thought about him.

No. 134858

You just need to force yourself to not check up on them. Never view their shit intentionally again. You don't want to have them on your mind and bring them up some day to him. I've done this before in fights and it's not cute.

No. 134884

You know I've never thought of it from that perspective, but that definitely helps, thank you
Thanks, I'll make a point of not doing this anymore - no good can come of it.

No. 134887

that's completely different from like say >>134830. someone feeling insecure because they think their partner likes something else is totally different than passing judgement (and implying that anon is somehow a part of gay men sex??)

No. 134888

Well I'm bi and sometimes women don't want me because a dick has been inside me. Sucks but it's how some people feel.

No. 134893

it's not the same. obviously it's upsetting to know you can't provide for your partner because of your physiology and know that they probably are desiring other people because you don't fit their "type" (be it that you're small boobed and they prefer big boobs, that you're not the race they 'prefer', or just that you're a woman and they usually prefer men), but also, bisexual women and lesbians aren't 2 cumbrains enabling each other the way bi men with other men are. also, the whole disease thing. let's not pretend they're the same, especially when men are very short-sighted and impulsive. i would be both afraid for my health, and concerned that i couldn't satisfy. all of my bi male and gay friends have cheated and don't care, there absolutely seems to be a very "whatever" culture around sex with these men, etc. people who aren't living in their fujoshi fantasies have these concerns, and it's normal.

No. 134896

Leave him, anon. If it bothers you now it will always bother you. Most men think other men are superior lovers because they know how deal with a dick. I think it's horse shit but I've had this thrown in my face when asking why my bi boyfriend cheated on me. Other excuses I've heard from men who cheated on their wives is that they need both, male and female. Most bi men will eventually crave dick and then you're really fucked.

No. 134903

This probably has enough replies but if it makes you uncomfortable then who cares what your bf deserves, what about what you deserve?
Don't you deserve to have the mental security that a man likes you for you, and wouldn't leave you to go fuck another man?
>I feel like there's a part of his body that I can never satisfy
That's called the prostate and unless you're willing to peg or fist you're correct on that. If he's never been with a woman until you and has been a gay man up until this point, then why you? Why now? What does he gain?

No. 134981

Hi, I'm a big time lurker here. I think I need some advice or maybe I just want to vent since things are actually pretty clear. Met my bf 2 years ago at university, we start dating after I push it for weeks. First spoke to him online making up a lie since I'm very shy and I had a crazy ex in the same class who was still obsessed with me and was controlling me all the time. We spent 8 months in my country together and 1 year apart. We were seeing each other every 2-3 months. I graduate, he comes to my country and put me in a very stressful situation which had me studying and preparing for graduation while he's at my place crying and screaming how much of a bitch I am. We had just planned I would go to his country to stay together and enroll in a master. I noticed the Red flags but I didn't mind since I was in a very stressful time due to my graduation. I went to his country and start university. He started to be very abusive with me. Words became gradually more offensive with him calling me crazy, dumb, bitch and useless. He would scream at me for petty reason like not closing the wardrobe door or forgetting to buy tomato, the top one was for changing my jeans before going out. That was it: i changed my jeans and he called me insane and a whore bc of that. On top of that, he started to become physically violent, he tried 4 times to slap me and even said I would deserve it. I got away for out rented place and I payed for the 2 places this months: the one in which I am right now and the old one. Some weeks after I notice he wasn't screaming nor insulting me so I thought he had changed a bit, I said I would come back to our old place. As soon as he thought I was going back (after he begged me to come back) he started acting like before, calling me a piece of shit and hoping I would die. Coronavirus breaks here too so we got quarantined, he called me to ask if I was gonna come back and I said no, he got angry and smashed his phone and blamed me for it. He went to his family house to quarantined, all while suicide guilt-tripping me for 2 days. We still talk and he was ok. All until today, we were talking peacefully on WhatsApp but suddenly he brings up suicide and starts to blame me for moving, saying I was a bad person for leaving him alone and destroying his life. I tried to calm him down but it was useless so I told him he had no right to mistreat me that way. He replies by saying I deserved everything bc if he got angry it was my fault. Example: I'm a whore bc 1 day I was looking at people in the bar we were at (bars here are very small and I have social anxiety so I was looking away to snap out of it, as usual, he didn't let me explain nor talk and proceedes to call me a filthy whore. He keeps saying I am the insane one bc he think I'm overreacting and I like drama. I positive I have my fault in this but I surely think I don't deserve having to be insulted all day (no one deserves this).

No. 134982

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Wow. he seems pure evil. I'm glad quarantine has graced you with time away from him. the suicide-baiting and whatever he's putting on you is not your responsibility. calming him down, etc., you shouldn't have to do that, and don't have to. he won't ever change, it seems a cycle of abuse. you definitely don't deserve this even if you played a part. are you planning on leaving him behind for good?

No. 134984

He says it's my fault for his rage but I find it impossible to explain myself. I used to keep quiet bc he told me to shut up so I spent hours listening to his monologues about why I'm a shitty person and insulting me. If I tried to leave and lock me in another room not to listen to that we would follow me and get angry if I didn't open the door. I tried to leave to walk and he used to threaten me he wouldn't let me come in at night. I got tired of letting him get away with this so I spoke up and told me he should let me speak when I want to speak and to stop insulting me with out listening to any reason. He got mad and That's when he started being violent. I got scared and I moved out bc of it, but apparently it's all my fault.

No. 134986

this is sounding like a restraining order and cops need to be involved, that's really scary

No. 134987

Ty for replying. Yes, I want to leave him bc he's getting worse every month and I can't bare all of this. He's the one who would always comeback and act like nothing happened, but I can't do anything to get him to appreciate me. I left my country for him and he's calling me a whore bc he thinks I have another bf in my country (?). I've told him many times multiple things so he could try to understand why I act in a way he maybe doesnt understand, but he still doesnt listen and just labels me as evil and a bitch so I think I'm fuckin wastin my time

No. 134989

Cut him off in every way.

No. 134995

I want a boyfriend and to be lovey-dovey with someone but at the same time I want to date more and meet more men before settling down. But I can't get over the "I'm a whore if I see to many men" feeling, probably something I developed from reading too much 4chan posts from incels.

I've never been in a relationship, only kissed 3 people and slept with one (it was appalling). What do you guys suggest?

No. 135004

Dating is good because it lets you see what kind of traits and personality you're looking for. You don't have to sleep around if it's not what you want. It's a lot easier to get manipulated when you have no experience in relationships. Incels want an innocent virgin because she can't compare them to anyone else and realize how shitty they are.

No. 135006

You can’t find a nice boy to settle down with if you don’t date around to get perspectives about what are truly important to you in a life mate. Absolute pink pill to know how many women literally don’t know what’s healthy or not because they only dated one or two shit men, just check the /g/ thread… Don’t buy the hurr durr cock carousel whore meme. Men want you to devote 100% to the first man that shows you attention when these are the same faggots that get “practice girlfriends” and dispose them without second thought when Stacy walks by.

No. 135007

any advice with detaching from someone prior to breaking up? been involved with a guy on and off for some time now, the ‘relationship’ is going nowhere and at this point is just filling me with constant anxiety and emotional distress

i need to end it for my own mental wellbeing but i’m a BPDfag so attachment is a huge issue and leaving someone seems almost impossible

No. 135011

But uh flirt with at least 2 new guys. Having multiple rebounds helped me a lot in leaving my fp, also stopped me from latching on to one person too quickly. Also make a list of all his sins for when your own brain decides to gaslight you.

No. 135080

I miss a guy I met on Tinder in September. We were both traveling through the country so didn't go on any further dates.

It wasn't even what he looked like (he was really good looking though), we spent all night talking and watching TV, our goals align, we both travel and run businesses. And a billion other things, I've never matched so well with someone before.

Probably never gonna see him again because like I said, we live in different countries. Given that we both can travel anywhere we want at any time, I guess it's possible. But it'd have to be a coincidence.

No one I meet compares to his personality. :(

No. 135084

My boyfriend is really lovely….when he’s around. Which is rarely. It’s a sad state of affairs when your bf isn’t excited to hang out and can’t be arsed to make plans. Just want him to want me. We haven’t texted or anything for a week : (

No. 135086

Dump immediately before you get even more attached. No, fuck off dumbasses with your "just communicate" bullshit.

No. 135091

My ex was so hot I can't date anyone else. He was a 12/10, no one compares in looks and that's now destroying my dating life.

What do I do?

No. 135093

(Guys communicate freely and w/o prompt when they're with someone they actually like and are attracted to).

Sorry sis, if he wanted to he would. You think men miss their video game appointments?

No. 135094

Accept that you have high standards and might be single for a long while or try to appreciate other types of looks?

I'm honestly in the same boat, my ex had long hair, a beard and was muscular, that combination is rather hard to come by where I'm from.

No. 135095

Yeah I have ridiculously high standards.

My ex was a 6'4 ripped blond with blue eyes. Literally hitler's wet dream, every time I looked at him I wondered how the fuck someone could be that good looking. Now if I like anyone it's because they vaguely resemble him.

No. 135106

Can’t you still message and call him, anon? If you really liked him you could always find a way to keep in touch until you can meet in person again. Don’t give up!

No. 135117

I have his number, but I don't know if I should. He mentioned not looking for anything serious on Tinder. Even though we clicked I don't want to bother him.

No. 135121

I have an annoying problem. Whenever I get along really well with a guy, I stop being able to be sexual with him. Like I friend zone him because we get along too well, even if he's a super hot Chad. But I WANT to get along well with a potential boyfriend. I want to be best friends with a partner. My stupid brain automatically friend zones him if that happens.

What do I do? Why do I have this issue?

No. 135123

So you're only sexually attracted to people who treat you like shit? Go see a fucking therapist.

No. 135124

No, cmon.

What I meant was if I get along too well with someone I stop being sexually attracted to them.

No. 135125

Like I said, see a therapist. People who feel that way have serious self-esteem issues.

No. 135126

I'm not attracted to people who treat me like shit. It just feels like my mind can't be best friends and sexually attracted to someone at the same time. But maybe you're right idk. I don't have self esteem issues

No. 135127

Maybe you're afraid of intimacy? Like, getting really close, vulnerable with someone, trusting them. Or there're some other fears concerning romantic relationships. So you prefer keeping the distance and not getting to the next stage.

No. 135129

I think you might be right. I don't know why though, because I crave intimacy. How do I even go about fixing this? Dating more?

I was a late bloomer and only had my first kiss at 21, maybe it's the inexperience too

No. 135141

Am I being a bitch for asking my boyfriend not to drink?

My boyfriend goes out and gets beers every time he has a bad day or has any small amount of stress (like normal workday problems). He recently was laid off due to coronavirus and his first course of action after freaking TF out for a solid 30 minutes was to go out and get alcohol while I went to work. Every day since, I come home and he has a beer in his hand.

This has been an ongoing issue with him even before this–he knows how I feel about the drinking (For the record…if he was drinking in a good mood around others I wouldn't give a fuck. It's the using it as a coping mechanism that I can't stand. His dad was an alcoholic.) but he doesn't stop. He always tells me he's done drinking just because he's upset and that he doesn't need to, but invariably the very next day I come home and he's drinking alone again because "he's stressed". He doesn't think it's a problem.

Now…because he was laid off money is going to be tight, tight, tight. He is saying we need to ration what food we have because we might not be able to afford more and rent. I agree FYI. I have stocked up on our essentials and spent nothing frivolous and put everything I can into our rent fund. He has basically 0 dollars and 0 cents to his name right now until he gets paid. I have a little money, all of which was put into rent for next month and for essentials like our heat bill, etc. etc. I put a 25 aside in the house for the heat bill, which I normally pay. I came home the other day and found some of it missing. Since he had bought beer that day, I asked where he got money for it, and he tried to pass it off like he had a few bucks left. He had given me the last of his money for a dinner he wanted a few nights previous. I point blank accused him of taking money from me. He admitted it.

Am I being a bitch for being absolutely fucking LIVID? He's literally telling me we won't have food but he's TAKING MONEY FROM OUR BILLS TO BUY BEER. And was trying to lie about it straight to my face. It's not a lot of alcohol–it's just beer. It's not hard liquor. I can't tell if I'm overreacting because his dad was an alcoholic or if I'm justified at being pissed off. He's drinking while I'm getting shit done. It pisses my shit off.


No. 135143

I think deep down you know the answer, anon. You were not being a bitch. That’s troubling and irresponsible behavior on his part. And just because it’s beer and not hard alcohol doesn’t mean it can’t be alcoholism… it still gets you drunk. Drinking every day is a red flag. Using the money YOU set aside to pay your bills is a bigger red flag.

No. 135147

His father was an alcoholic and your bf is allowing himself to go down a similar path. He took your money to buy alcohol in such precarious times, when you say he has nothing to his name. Even if it seems a small amount, every dollar counts because you have no idea how long we have to social distance.

No. 135155

My boyfriend can't get over the fact that I'm not a virgin. I lost my virginity at a pretty young age, 15, to my long term boyfriend at the time. I do regret it, but I also know there's nothing I can do about it now. My boyfriend on the other hand is KHHV due to being homeschooled all of his life. He doesn't want premarital sex and sees sex as a very personal and serious thing, so he's upset that I gave mine away and he says I'm easy.

We don't argue much, but all of our arguments so far have been over this. I don't know what to do, anons. I love him and I don't ever want to leave him. I know that it's not easy, but I wish he'd just get over that it happened because I'm tired of talking about a thing I cannot ever change over and over again. I'm really stuck on what to do.

No. 135156

If he's stealing your money to drink he has a serious problem with alcohol. He needs help before he goes down the same route as his father, or perhaps he already has.

No. 135159

Dump the stupid fuck, why is this even a question? You're dating an incel. Do you honestly think staying with this retard forever is a good idea?

No. 135160

Are you dating some kind of religious fundamentalist??
>I love him and I don't ever want to leave him
I just want you to know that this is a fallacy by your brain. You can and should dump him.
He sees you as used good. But don’t you dare buy into it. Unless he himself seeks to dismantle his Madonna/whore hang up, and whatever sexuality issues he has, there’s nothing you can do make it better. You have literally done nothing wrong. It wasn’t as if you lost your virginity frivolously in a one night stand, you gave it to a long term romantic partner, there is no possible excuse for him to have his scrote in a bunch.

No. 135161

Honestly it sounds to me like he's highly insecure about his sexual inexperience as an adult and wants you to feel bad about your sexual experience instead to mask his own insecurity and inexperience. He hides behind "I value sex so much I want to wait until I'm married" because he's scared and insecure about his inexperience.

No. 135165

I really cannot emphasize enough how little he thinks of you, if he's calling you easy and bringing this up repeatedly. Men who flip out over their gf's past think of them as disgusting used goods who have waived their rights to any respect or decent treatment, and feel fully justified in treating them like shit. Unless he's legitimately religious, it's highly unlikely that he actually takes virginity seriously. More like he has developed sour grapes towards sexually active people because he failed at becoming one of them.

It's not fair nor deserved, it's a major defect in the male psyche, but it is what it is. He will never get over it until he gains experience of his own, cut your losses.

No. 135168


Sounds like a pretty sweet deal for him that you've only had one boyfriend before him. I'm afraid the insecurity is terminal, there's no pleasing someone like that.
>change the past
>I can't

No. 135169

Thank you girlies, needed someone to tell me the truth.

No. 135189

Boyfriend has a great personality and we get along super well. We've been together for 4 (almost 5) years. However, I found out recently that he cheated on me with three different women about 2 years ago. He hasn't cheated since, but I feel like things just will never be the same. He's also a complete pornstick and can't cum when we're having sex. He refuses to stop his obsessive porn shit. I'm scared to break up with him because I feel like I'll never have a boyfriend with a personality like his ever again. Previous boyfriend did the same shit to me. Worst fear is that it'll happen again or I'll end up alone period because I'm not very attractive. Feel like I deserve better, but I won't get it.

No. 135190

Dump him. What would you tell someone else if they were in the same situation?

Find someone who won't cheat on you. There are billions of men out there. If you've had boyfriends before, you'll have another one again. I'm sure you're not as unattractive as you think.

Imagine your perfect guy is out there but you'll never get to be with him if you stay with your dipshit boyfriend.

No. 135195

Is him cheating on you and being pornsick not indicators of his actual personality? What kind of person with a "great" personality would cheat on their SO…

No. 135196


you’re holding yourself back from the happy, healthy relationship you deserve anon, keep that in mind when you hesitate about leaving. you DO deserve better and you’ll find it one way or another if you make the first move toward a better life for yourself

i’ll share my own experience so you can see how bad it can get, keep in mind that on a personality and humour level we were perfect for each other but in reality that’s not enough for a healthy and well functioning relationship

i wasted three years of my life with a pornsick loser, even moved into a flat with him and by then my brain had convinced me that his behaviour was normal because i couldn’t deal with the stress and insecurity that the reality of the situation gave me. he didn’t physically cheat on me (that i know of) but spent hundreds, possibly thousands on cam girls and even recorded them during his live jerk of sessions and resold their content like a true piece of shit. our “sex life” was me jerking him off while he stared at his phone screen with noise cancelling headphones on and he had the nerve to make jokes about my lack of sex drive/lack of wetness when we tried having sex (aka when he spat on his dick and tried jackhammering me with no foreplay or romance/intimacy) they DO NOT change. porn will always take priority in their brains. they will choose porn over an actual human in front of them who love them without a second thought. you have to gather a bit of self respect and run far away, i wish i had done it sooner. i sat there with a bunch of safari tabs of research open that explain the real life effects of porn/sex addiction and the moron pretended to listen and change his ways and tried to do it behind my back instead. your dude will be no different, PLEASE leave anon. what i talked about was the tip of the iceberg, you’ve got two years on the relationship i had and i’ll tell you right now that it’s going nowhere slowly. there’s a very real chance that if you tried to confront him about how much it’s affecting you he’ll get angry because he would probably rather have no one than not have porn. you could always give him the choice: you or porn, and see how he reacts?

i hope you heal and move on well, i’m rooting for you. sorry if this comes across as aggressive it’s genuinely from a place of love

No. 135201

My ex treated me badly but he was the first person I was with so I can't get over him easily. It's been 6 months and I still miss him.

I know he's useless and I should forget him, but easier said than done. Any tips on how to help myself get over him quicker?

No. 135204

>Boyfriend has a great personality
>he cheated on me with three different women
>He's also a complete pornstick and can't cum when we're having sex. He refuses to stop his obsessive porn shit.

For fucks sake anon, what kind of good personality is that? Cheating and getting off to rape on tape to the point he can't even enjoy normal sex no matter how you feel about it?

These threads are honestly like a parody of themselves at this point. There's a reason it says "Break up with your boyfriend" right there in the OP, because like 90% of the time these men are just garbage and the only solution is to drop them. idk what other kind of answers you're looking for.

No. 135208

Wake the fuck up you retarded faggot.

Be a big girl and actually follow through with some conviction and break up with him. Are you really this mindless?

No. 135209

anon please leave him, being alone is better than being with a cumbrain like him and you are worth more than this. i promise it gets better even if it hurts at first. you're here to get a new perspective, right? leave him. no matter what he or anyone else says, he doesn't respect you and youd be better off long term without him. you talk a lot about how youre unattractive and you're scared no one else will love you, but that's what he and your trauma have conditioned you to feel. someone else is out there for you that's going to respect you and love you, and even if not, being alone is better than being with trash like that. you deserve better. he sucks.

No. 135211

This guy is not normal whatsoever, have some hope

No. 135305

Why did you break up?

No. 135307

File: 1585664114502.jpg (7.86 KB, 302x167, aggr.jpg)

My SIL is making me feel uncomfortable. I hope I am being delusional.

- She seemed nice and totally a-okay before we met eachother IRL, was polite, supportive and acting like a decent human being.
- Meets me IRL. Is actually a spoiled 29yo woman who have never studied or had a job. Got kicked out by her bf.
- Ever since I met her IRL she has always been staring at me, checking me out in a jealous way. Would make compliments by only using the same tactics:
Ah I wish I had your Face! - kind of stuff
Compliments me and right after starts throwing herself a pity party by comparing herself to me or immidatley saying a negative comment about herself Both of these things she throw at me make me uncomfortable and I do not know how to answer but smile gently n wish for it to be over.
- Can't stand it when things are not about her. Starts making every conversation and topic about herself. ME ME ME. If not about her, she just leaves. After we go to her room after some time, she starts being 'wahhh i was feeling so lonely / i thought i was so boring ' with a TERRIBLY BAD acting. Its always obvious she wants attention.
- Admits herself that she is a huge attention seeker.
- Call me quirkyxdxd but I always use emotes in my messages. She aske d why, I explained. After that she told me she is going to do that to steal my cuteness away. Does that now.
- I took a picture of my new setup and sent it to gc because MIL was curious about it. Day after we go visit them… She replaced everything to look exactly like my setup does.

I am not going to be surprised if when she goes outside she's trying to dress up the way I do. I am scared and I deeply hope I am just overthinking, but I swear to god. All the stares and comments and the fact how much she uses her 'low-self-esteem' as the way to get showered with compliments (everywhere, even on internet) is crazy.
Is she trying to copy me now? I am speechless because I am 7 years younger than her. I want to talk to her as less as possible, but she lives with MIL and my husband is obsessed w her because wah sister sister. I think I just need support. Maybe she could also be jealous because her mother and grandmother loves her and she said her bfs family hated her.

No. 135312

Different ideals and goals in life.

No. 135322

File: 1585675276262.png (14.33 KB, 100x96, limit.png)

I finally broke up with my bf who both dated a 15 year old and didn't use soap, ever. Those were both pretty popular posts on here so maybe some of you will recognize them. Right now I just feel so angry and I can't eat. He was my only real friend and now I have no one. I am a clown.

No. 135330

I think when you truly find the right person it doesn't matter so much. I thought I felt like that when I dumped my ex, who (according to others) looked like various kpop stars and esports players. But when I met my current bf all of it melted away.
How long has it been for you? After a year+ I can no longer tell if my ex is attractive or not, I can't even really picture him.

No. 135331

You're right - people always become more attractive when you fall for them. But I can't get myself to fall for anyone in the first place.

>How long has it been for you?

6 months. I go through phases of not caring then feeling terrible again. We weren't compatible. Every time I thought about our different ideals my heart sank because I knew it wouldn't work. But he was very attractive and very nice, so my dumb brain can't get over him.

No. 135332

everyone is a chump at least once in their lives, it's for the best you aren't together anymore

No. 135338

you're not a clown anymore, anon. you're bettering yourself and your life will only get better now that you've cut that garbage excuse of a human out of your life.

No. 135340

>download dating apps
>having some okay convos, but mainly disappointing
>stumble upon ex's profile
>feel sad again

ugh, guess it's still not time to start dating.

No. 135346

I'm not sure if this is the right place to put this since it's not much of a relationship (yet). I met this guy on Tinder and he's surprisingly really interesting. Since matching we've talked for hours on end. There's a couple problems though and I need to know if it's my fault or his. I'll preface this by saying we havent met yet due to the quarantine. One issue is that majority of the time I'm starting the conversation, whenther it be Facetime or starting a text convo I feel as if I always initiate it. Another issue is that when we are on Facetime, he is the one to always exit the conversation first and majority of. the time it's because he "needs" to play video games with his buddies. I find this kind of a red flag because it screams man-child to me but he doesn't come off that way at all when we're talking. I've asked him if I'm bothering him at all with all the contact I've been trying to make and he just kind of shrugged it off.

I feel like I'm being dramatic because I don't even know the guy yet and I'm already feeling entitled to his attention but I really just can't get him off my mind and it's driving me nuts.

No. 135348

You may be coming off as clingy, or worse a bpdfag. You said he talks with you for hours, that’s a good sign. I don’t see any issue with him playing vidya with friends unless he plays excessively. At this point in time, you’re less important than his friends… Try not texting first and see if he reaches out.

No. 135349

Thank you, this is really helpful. I really don't want to come off as clingy because I'm usually not like this. But yeah, I'll definitely try waiting for him to contact first, I didn't even think of that lmfao.

No. 135515

Advice for a virgin:

Never been in a relationship, never found the kind of love I'm looking for–
But with this pandemic going on, it seems like more and more people are getting online to date someone

How feasible is it to start an online relationship with someone? It's going to be long distance to start with, but what if they lived in another country–the next country over?

Should I try and find someone closer just because it's easier or should I find someone I actually like regardless of distance?

No. 135519

No, don't. It'll be exciting at first then quickly become incredibly frustrating because you can't see each other.

Just wait 1 or 2 months for everything to open up again. People will be so tired of being quarantined it'll be the easiest time in existence to get laid.

No. 135523

I don't want to get laid (I mean I do but that's not what I mean), I want an actual relationship

I will totally heed your advice and expect to have a bit more success when the pandemic calms down–but ultimately, I never had that much success beforehand
Even if people are touch-starved, I really don't see myself finding someone once everyone can find someone they actually like near them

No. 135524

The problem is you're gonna get a lot of people that start off wanting the same thing then drop off and ghost along the way because texting for months without meeting is tiring no matter how well you get along.

Honestly I haven't had any relationships either. I just lost my virginity to a Tinder hookup because I couldn't stand being a 22 year old virgin anymore. It was destroying my confidence around men. I'm pretty, I just have the same issue with finding someone genuinely compatible. The only person I've ever gotten along with perfectly lives in a different country, and we met while traveling.

I'll keep doing casual app shit until I meet someone by chance.

No. 135525

yes, every single person will pair up just like in middle school PE and you will be the only one left without a pair. come on, like give it a try at least. be very upfront you want a relationship only and maybe something will come of it. more likely than if you did nothing anyway.

distance wise, probably would be wiser to look for someone closer to you so meeting up can be more feasible as LDR sucks and you cannot really gauge a person through online/calls etc. maybe you live in a severely underpopulated area or like idk Luxembourg, in that case never mind, but surely you can find someone you click with in 1 country's radius kek.

No. 135526

File: 1585865317583.png (429.47 KB, 633x619, original.png)

I broke up with my boyfriend of one year today after I told him last night how it bothered me that he told me I wasn't his type and that he was liking pictures of half naked women on Twitter on top of (literally) thousands of half naked little anime girls. His response wasn't loving or understanding. The only thing he did was defend himself saying he didn't think it was that big of a deal that he did/said those things to me and saying to stop painting him as the bad guy. After that, he ghosted me and deleted me off social media (we are LDR due to school). I felt crushed and I realized he wasn't in love with me and didn't even care about me.

I added him this morning to end things like an adult. It did feel better when I did that and his response was still the same - uncaring and just wanting to be right. He could do no wrong. And still not making effort to understand why saying such a thing and doing those things would hurt me. So I thought, well I don't see a future with this man then if this is how he handles things.

I'm sorry if this reads like a mess. I'm definitely feeling broken. I still loved this man and would have never done the things he did to me. I gave him my best effort towards our relationship and I realize now that he didn't give much back in many aspects. He often used me as his therapist but would ignore if I tell him my personal thoughts problems so I rarely did. The night before, he told me how he loved me, wanted to go through life together with me, and would never leave me but it was only after he came twice from sexting with me. These were things I would say to him when we weren't lusting. I feel foolish and disgusted thinking about this.

Could I please get some supportive words or any thoughts, anons? I would very much appreciate it and could use it. I haven't posted here in years but I remember you guys being quite supportive. It feels sort of free not being with him anymore but also a little sad of course.

No. 135528

aww anon. he is a colossal dick and not worth your time. in the long run this is for the best as evidently he didn't care about you in the way you did about him. plus the hentai and ethot bs on top of it all, like if seeing drawn child tits is more important to him than you, the relationship was kinda doomed anyway, i am glad you stood your ground. wanting to be constantly in the right is such an annoying and selfish trait, well done not succumbing to it.
break ups always suck, there is no way around it, but i hope you don't feel too lonely in these corona times and if you do live alone, maybe take time to reach out to friends and family more? hang in there, i hope you heal soon!

No. 135529

>like give it a try at least
What do you think I've been doing these past 24 years?
I just mean, the chances of me finding someone after the pandemic will probably be the same as the chances I had of finding someone before the pandemic

I probably do have the option of hooking up with someone, but that's still not really what I want.

Like do you seriously think I was just twiddling my thumbs indoors waiting for someone to discover my presence through magic?

No. 135531

Thank you so much, anon. You are very sweet. He made it clear that he was selfish when he kept making it about himself and ignoring my feelings. I know it was only a year, but I was so devastated to realize that I was spending time trying to make things work with someone like that. He tried adding me back again after I said my farewell and I ignored his request and changed my username so he cannot bother me anymore. I think he was just having me kind of there at this point because he told me how he didn't have a strong connection with anyone he talked to and he just left his parents' house over the weekend due to fighting with them daily. I think I was the only person who was showing him love and affection anymore and he took me for granted.

No. 135536

I've read your thread and honestly no you won't find someone with that attitude. If you keep saying you with find someone then you won't.

As far as online. It's a gamble. You might get someone close or someone far away. LDR suck ass and can be a big headache. If you do decide you want to try online go for ones where you can choose how far or close they are from you. You'll have to endure the possibility multiple ghosting and even more after the pandemic over and you are able to meet each other. Realize with online most men aren't talking to one girl only, even if they seem very interested, so you should too.

No. 135537

Does attitude really have anything to do with it?
It's not like my profile is filled with stuff like "you probably won't like me… :("
And like, I'm allowed to have an attitude

Sorry if I'm coming off as mean or rude, it's just, everything you're saying about finding someone is kind of a cliche and I've heard it all before and even when I do make changes it's never worked out.

I'm allowed to be frustrated about how unlucky I've been in love.

No. 135540


Then get the fuck off this thread if you don't want to hear anon advice that you don't agree with. Have some patience with yourself and your timeline

No. 135549

Nta but
>Does attitude really have anything to do with it?
Yes. Attitude has everything to do with it. Because even though you say
>It's not like my profile is filled with stuff like "you probably won't like me… :("
…it comes off in your affect & attitude, it's unpleasant and unattractive, and it's most def easy to pick up on irl. People that come off that way are a pain to be around.
These comments you made:
>Even if people are touch-starved, I really don't see myself finding someone once everyone can find someone they actually like near them
>everything you're saying about finding someone is kind of a cliche and I've heard it all before
>even when I do make changes it's never worked out
>how unlucky I've been in love
Are completely self-defeating! You're fucking it up for yourself before you're even able to make a connection with someone else.

But to answer your original question about LDRs… I mean, it would open up your dating pool so you may find someone you're more compatible with vs. the people in proximity to you, so maybe it'll be fruitful. I agree with the anons saying it's not worth the headache though. Something about not meeting people face-to-face leaves too much room for deceit and weirdness, but to each her own.

Also, what >>135540 said. It's harsh but true.

No. 135632

We aren't officially together yet atm but my SO watches hentai and plays weird 3D games on steam that have sexual stuff and it makes me uncomfortable
I can't change what he likes etc and he isn't harming anyone but how do I feel better

No. 135634

>aren't together yet
Are you underage? Get some self-respect. Also he's not thinking of you as SO so keep that in mind.

No. 135635

He literally called me his SO and we were in a relationship for several months but broke up due to issues. I don't know why you're calling me a child over something like this. And him playing porn games has little to do with how he sees me, you think no guy in a relationship watches porn? I think you're underage if you believe this

No. 135636

I wouldn't date a cumbrain to begin with so. I see your on and off relationship is gonna go well this time seeing that you're already uncomfortable before you even got back together. Have fun getting cucked by Projekt Melody lol

No. 135637


Uhh did he call you his SO while being in your relationship, or is he calling you his SO right now? If that's not the case, then he's not your SO lmfao.

Seconding what anon >>>>135634 said

Please, raise your standards a little, have some self-respect and remove this cumbrain from your life and thoughts. Clearly not worth it.

No. 135639

He called me his SO a few days ago so now. We are on the same page. I mean I get that most men have sexual urges and usually more than women do. You know most of them watch porn even in relationships

No. 135641

>she never dated a man who isn’t coomer
Tragic. Anyway, women get sexual urges just like men do. But we prefer to actually have intimacy with our partners instead of giving ourselves sexual dysfunction with rape on tape or loli tentacle hentai. If you’re gonna cape for your man porn addiction this hard then why even post to begin with, keep feeling bad, SIMP.

No. 135642

SIMP. Most normal, cute functioning women would leave a guy who plays anime porn games cause they know they can better.

No. 135649

How the fuck do you prepare to break up with someone?
Ive already secretly purged my nudes off all his stuff

We’ve been dating for almost 4 years and I’m sick of his shit

No. 135666

Do you say the same about women who watch hentai/porn? I don't know why you all still haven't learned that most people do this kind of stuff.. And calling it an addiction? Just because you're interested in something doesn't mean you're an addict. Do you ever drink alcohol or coffee? If yes then apparently according to you you are an addict

No. 135674

>You know most of them watch porn even in relationships

Which absolutely shouldn't be as socially accepted as it is. You wouldn't want your SO/boyfriend to jerk off to a naked woman in real life in front of him, but when it's a porn actress/model/manga on his screen it's suddenly okay?

No. 135677

>Do you say the same about women who watch hentai/porn?
Yes and no. Women can be cumbrain. Difference is women internalize (want to be abused, self inserts as female performer) while men externalize (self inserts as the one abusing the female performer). Porn makes men objectify women, but makes women objectify themselves.
>Do you ever drink alcohol or coffee? If yes then apparently according to you you are an addict
Brainlet analogy. I don't lose my ability to function if I don't consume alcohol and coffee. Your "SO" on the other hand can't have sex with you without fantasizing about anime titties and comparing you in his mind kek
Don't know why you're still defending this when you said it makes you feel bad. Is your lord looking over your shoulder and praising you for being a good pet?

No. 135686

Apparently you did lose your ability to function, seeing as you can't talk to someone with respect and without all those belittling sad insults. Ironic how you don't even notice your own bad behavior while complaining about others.

No. 135687

Okay but what can we do? This is the standard and it's what people do, and it's human nature

No. 135690

Doormat wants respect all the sudden, huh

No. 135691

Sort your own issues out first before attacking randoms for no reason, this isn't high school, petty insults don't make you a cool kid sweetie.

No. 135692

fuck sake stop enabling the normalcy of porn. No, there are men out there that aren't as sex obsessed as your SO, but you've decided to say 'fuck it, I must be okay with this' because you have no self-respect. Get a grip and put yourself first, you said yourself it makes you uncomfortable and makes you feel bad so why tf are you sticking around.

No. 135694

B-b-but muh human nature,,wahmen watch porn too! Nothing we can do uwu,,,
Oh no I'm not cool girl like you. Evidently, he's a vinyl hipster who loves fetish manga.

No. 135705

File: 1586014797589.jpg (1.08 MB, 500x208, UyTpOS7.jpg)

No. 135706

File: 1586015870299.png (525.35 KB, 479x530, h.png)

Is SIMP just another way to say "pickme"?

No. 135714

gb2twitter faggot

No. 135754

i dont get your meaning? simp is another word for cuck or whiteknight

No. 135793

File: 1586096543719.gif (2.41 MB, 498x281, haru.gif)

So, I met this guy on a dating app a few weeks ago, and we've been texting regularly since. We just had our first "date" on Zoom (lol) because we both agreed that we shouldn't go out with each other until after quarantine.

He's been playing this "wholesome good boy" angle since we've been talking, which I found to be massively endearing after wasting months of time talking to cumbrained fuckbois and old shallow assholes who were looking for a no-strings attached FWB. But enough of that, and more on this particular guy:
>only had two previous girlfriends
>claims one of them was physically abusive
>says that he's "basically" a virgin despite having had intercourse
>says the most important goal in his life is to become a good husband and father to his children
>already talking about "catching feelings" for me and his friend's already been calling me his gf (uh…)
>unapologetically a weeb (and constantly calls me a tsundere which i may have been passively enabling by not telling him to stop outright)
>raised Hindu but recently converted to Christianity for reasons he didn't get into
>Scored libertarian right on an online political compass quiz i made him take last night (lol)

But the main reason I'm making this post is because some his most recent hot takes on… I guess women's issues? Two days ago, he invited me to a video call with him and his best friend. And I forgot exactly how or why the topic of abortion came up, but he established that he was strictly pro-life. His reasoning was something like "A poor quality of life is better than no life because all life is inherently valuable", and when I said that I thought women's opinions on this subject should be valued more than men's, I think he was like "Our opinions should all be equally valued as human beings" or something in that vein. I restrained the urge to chew him out in front of his (pro-choice) best friend, but just last night he told me some things I found even harder to brush off.

>says "don't drop me for this okay" after i send him the political compass test

>a "close friend" cut him off after they had a debate
>close friend was female and the topic of the argument was related to feminism
>says she got emotional and accused him of mansplaining
>thinks that she got upset over "something about kavanaugh"
>"i don't think my opinions on feminism are that controversial"
>says he only likes having arguments with "the boys" because with them the discussion is free of animus(?) and "nothing, feelings or otherwise, extends outside of the discussion"

Maybe it's internalized misogyny and my fear of coming off as an "emotional woman" , but I've been avoiding asking him too many questions about these kinds of things despite the fact that knowing this is starting to make me question the prospect entering a serious relationship with him. Should I figure out a way to make this work, or should I drop everything and run? (cuz we haven't even met irl yet lolol)

No. 135794

If she allows her bf to watch porn then it means she's a pickme

No. 135795

test the waters and tell him your political views, if he is not acceptable and obviously not willing to change cut it short and dump him.

No. 135798

Okay so a couple of months ago I was very bored and went on Omegle. I used only text because I didn't want to see any penises and filtered people by adding an interest. I briefly talked to some boring people until I found this one guy who lives in the other side of the world that wasn't absolutely stupid and we talked a little bit more. After a while I don't remember why we both confessed we browsed imageboards so we started to feel more comfortable and it was genuinely fun. At some point he says he has to leave but asks for a way to contact me and we exchanged numbers. We have been talking since then and it has been mainly ok/friendly (although we already fought over some political views). We are both self isolating because of the virus so we have even watched movies together and read some books, and sometimes he's so into me, messaging me all the time and being sweet, but other times he's cold and doesn't say much. I'm kinda the same so I don't take it personally but I'm starting to think about him more and more often and feel sad when he doesn't talk to me.

I guess I'm just venting here to rationalize and accept the fact that I should just stop talking to him because this won't end well or go anywhere.

No. 135805

drop. him.

abortion is a huge issue and if you're not on the same page then you shouldn't be together. if issues are arising this early on, there's no point carrying it on.

No. 135806

Dropping everything and running would be the same outcome as if you confront him about these things, and it goes wrong. So if you're prepared for that outcome anyway, then why not confront him? I wouldn't enter into a relationship with someone who has opinions that make me mad or uncomfortable.

though tbh he sounds like a simp. he might just back down on those views once you tell him how you feel about it.

No. 135809

File: 1586107818937.jpg (38.39 KB, 409x277, full.jpg)

hey so, i find this guy to be 10000/10. i'm just curious how attractive do you find him? i just wanna know because if you don't find him attractive that'll make me happy, because less competition. anything that looks like this, i'll cream all over for. anything that doesn't look like this i find totally disgusting. i guess i wanna know if i have 'too high standards' or if i just have a very specific 'type'? if i had to describe him.. apart from trashy pretty white boy, he has the deep-set eyes and prominent brow you see in a lot of male models, in general his face is just pretty lol but not as much as the instafamous prettyboys if you get me? still a bit more masculine looking than that. also blond and tall/skinny.

No. 135810

no, manon. you don't look attractive. gtfo

No. 135816

Don't be daft, that message didn't sound like it was written by a man at all.

You're in luck anon, because your dream boy is nothing to write home about. Go after him kek, the heart wants what it wants

No. 135817

he's handsome but he's too elfy looking for me. i wish he had a bigger nose or something kek. i would say you have a type and you should go for it. it's not too high. i'm the same way with a different type. i love deep set eyes/prominent brow bones too. they're not THAT rare, you just have to be on the lookout.

No. 135818

Looks like a troll

No. 135820

ugly albino

No. 135823

He looks like white trash and about to OD. Kinda cute.

No. 135824

File: 1586112900683.jpg (58.4 KB, 960x539, MV5BNjRiOWUxYWItODg1MS00MzExLW…)

cute in a slightly trashy way. reminds me of this russian actor I find kinda cute. he has a weird nose that keeps getting him villain roles

No. 135826

please don't feel guilty for having a type with like one conventionally attractive feature. do you think the average man feels guilty for finding a pretty girl next door attractive? it's not selfish to have a type like that, especially since if you do find someone who fits, you can make him feel incredibly wanted. that's like a rare gift you can give someone. besides, clearly plenty of other women have the opposite type or no type, there's plenty to go around. it's perfectly sane and healthy to have a type that can be summed up as everyday run of the mill handsome. instead of feeling guilty or high maintenance, i suggest feeling excited and happy that you have enough passion to even feel this way about anyone. many people don't. i say really let yourself get into it with no apologies. it's fun.

No. 135831

Not my "10000/10" personally, but not unattractive at all either. His light complexion looks rly nice too, a bit "elfy" like >>135817 said.

No. 135832

Would cheat on/10

No. 135847

Thank you sis. Seriously, it’s weird. I tried going on various dating apps and I found all the men so gross that it made me depressed. Like I’ll never be happy because I’m not attracted to anyone. I even got matches from men who I’m sure are conventionally attractive by most people’s standards, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable even sitting next to them on a date. This guy is perfection to me. My brain is too wired to think of him as perfect, but logically I’m pretty sure he’s not everyone’s cup of tea. That makes me happy because it means someone like him is not as high up in the desirability scale in real life as my brain thinks. You guys calling him an albino troll, I love that lol

No. 135848

dating apps make everyone with any kind of tastes or standards feel like that. you're literally being asked if you find random strangers dateable or not, ofc you're gonna say no to most of them. not to mention how horrible men are at taking hot pics of themselves. don't feel guilty or unrealistic. just keep a sharp eye out for your dream man and be confident in your sexuality. even if other women found him perfect too, why be ashamed? it's not wrong to have conventional taste even if jealous men make you feel that way.

No. 135849

samefag but you're talking about yourself like you have some weird brain disorder or fetish but you're literally just describing having healthy sexual preferences. you have neither low/pickme tier standards nor do you have delusionally high ones and you can make some blonde elf guy out there very happy one day. that's great. ffs. embrace it.

No. 135858

>not to mention how horrible men are at taking hot pics of themselves
lmao this, why are men so appalling at taking photos of themselves? they all look miserable, angry or like lunatics. the hottest guy I've known took terrible photos of himself that undermined his attractiveness severely. they're really doing themselves a disservice

No. 135859

plus they know nothing about angles so even a guy with good bone structure will take a pic where he looks like an egg with a double chin. men really need to learn to self objectify a liiiitle bit. it would do both us and themselves a favor

No. 135861

He maybe somewhat cute now but he 10000/10 will not age well. Also you're a slut for Cook from Skins.

No. 135864

I work in a store in a trashy neighbourhood and he looks like all of my skelly male costumers who are 25 yet look 40, have god knows how many kids, don't think they need to wear shoes nor a shirt if the weather is nice and carry beer bottles in the pockets of their pants.
I'd usually wish you good luck, but here it's not needed, just go for him anon, he's virtually yours already lol

>he 10000/10 will not age well
Definitely this

No. 135867

tbh i see so many anons drooling after pink skinned guys. idgi. literally cannot understand the attraction of very white men. pink skinned men are honestly so unattractive, no matter the haircolor.

No. 135869

they cute now but yeah they be aging like shit. always fucking balding.

No. 135872

File: 1586133994250.jpg (74.64 KB, 450x234, NakedMoleRat-01.jpg)

they're not even cute now tbh. they have molerat skin even when they're young…

No. 135874


Oh my God my sides

No. 135875

File: 1586135242536.jpg (150.58 KB, 1021x546, sd.jpg)

There are both ugly and attractive men with that coloring. Let’s not generalize so much.

No. 135878

i agree with you but that pic isn't a good example. guy on the right doesn't even have pink undertones, he has kind of a tan, and doesn't have any ginger in his hair lol. no fair.

No. 135888

File: 1586158602475.png (728.1 KB, 1023x544, 203923828932.png)

No. 135891

File: 1586165344397.jpg (54.29 KB, 600x600, f7f54be048f339562e033178ee7a1f…)

I love blonds so much, it's such a satisfying look when they actually look good. But I've noticed the key difference between good and bad looking blonds (guys):

The bad looking ones have cool undertones. Pinkish look, see through skin, poor hairline. Hair color is more mousey. Probably of British descent.

The good looking ones have warm undertones. Their skin has a more yellow/tan look naturally, it looks "thicker", their hairline is good. Hair color is more hay-like and "pure" blond. North European but probably with some South Euro genes.

No. 135892

Yeah I used to wonder why blond women are so lusted after but then 'tall and dark' men are equally such a thing. Like you said I'm guessing it's to do with skintone and looking 'healthy' based on complextion and how hair brings out different tones.

I was blond for about six months of my life, didn't think it suited my pale look all that much but then men still showed way more interest, probably all based on some assumptions they have about bottle blonds though.

No. 135893

blonde haired men are so ugly to me lmao. they have to have dark hair. so much sexier.

No. 135895

most of the blonde guys i've met looked nothing like the pic you posted, i guess that's why i never really liked them
also the combo blonde + blue eyes makes they seem cold imo

No. 135899

Let's not derail. But yeah, anyone who says river phoenix isn't hot is out of their fucking minds lol

No. 135903

File: 1586188712246.png (2.55 MB, 1102x1664, Screen Shot 2020-04-06 at 10.5…)

How do I get my boyfriend to present himself a little better? He's naturally slim and very cute in the face, but if he doesn't shave his face and wash/style his hair he looks quite…junky and greasy? More so than other guys I've dated, like his skin is naturally more oily maybe.

It doesn't help that he has this cool vintage almost sleazecore style of dressing like pic related, while it's very appealing when he's clean-cut, it sometimes adds to the dirty look because vintage clothes tend to look worn-down. Sometimes he even has tiny holes in his clothes.

I feel really bad for expressing this because 1, I myself have gotten quite slovenly while working from home too, and 2, he has a lot of student debt and says things like "ah, when I've paid off my loans, I'll get some nice pants and shoes." So I don't feel like I can really say anything. Should I just buy him clothes and be really meticulous about my own hygiene to set an example?

No. 135906

Suggest doing nightly skin routine together. Suggest going shopping together. Basically, dress up his training as cute couple activity.

No. 135930

How do I get a bf at all?

Everyone in this region is gross and the guys I meet online all end up being losers. I have never felt so hopeless.

No. 135934

File: 1586222226334.gif (494.77 KB, 263x197, samphone.gif)

My bf goes to strip clubs without telling me and then confesses after the fact. I honestly don't know why I'm fine with it and I kind of suspect I just let him cause he gets really self destructive and panics when he feels guilty so I just assure him so I won't have to deal with him freaking out. Since I'm bi he wants me to go with him and he wants to pay for me to get a lapdance and idk I just think I'm too awkward to be in that kind of environment. Every time he tries to get me to go I chicken out.

How much of a turbocuck am I for letting it get to this point?

No. 135938

Quite a colossal turbocuck here. Him "packing" and being self-destructive aren't reasons to go to strip-clubs without even telling you, sounds like he's an abymissal wimp at that. Aren't relationships based on trust and communication? How can you let your man get away with this? How can you even tolerate that? Sounds more like you lack self-confidence to show your discomfort and trying to justify it because he has "issues". That doesn't justify it at all.
Don't do and tolerate things that make you uncomfortable.

No. 135948

This is pretty pathetic anon, he only sees your bisexuality as a fetish for himself. He literally gets lapdances and chills in his spare time wasting away his money on strippers and you let him.

No. 135950

He's using you for his fetish and he sounds like a pretty pathetic guy that can't own up to what he likes. Do you really want to be with someone like this?

No. 135953

Seriously girl, only breaking up with him is not enough. There's nothing worse than guys like this, first being driven by his dick and then guilttripping you by playing sensitive little boy who loves you sooo much. And then instead of lying and saying it was a one time mistake he thinks confessing is enough to absolve him from any wrongdoings and then on top of that he has the audacity to try and make this into both of your "thing"? Imagine you ordered a male prostitute, he comes home and you say "uwu I'm so sorry but hey, why don't you just watch while he goes down on me? Oh, and how about he does you later on? Otherwise I will feel so guily and you don't want me to feel sad, right? Right?!"…
>he gets really self destructive and panics when he feels guilty
My suggestion (although it's doesn't sound like you'd ever do that) is using this to make him suffer as much as possible, let him have the panic attack of his life, absolutely destroy any ounce of confidence he's ever had.

No. 135954

Ask how he'd feel about a male stripper gyrating on you. No reason why he should oppose that.. unless he has one set of rules for you and a whole other set of rules (none) for himself.

> How much of a turbocuck am I

You're choosing to stay in a bad relationship where he doesn't respect you and by extension you don't respect yourself either. The sooner you get away from him the sooner you can work on growing a backbone again

No. 135967

Doesn't matter if you're bi or aren't bi. He shouldn't be doing this and I wouldn't doubt he's asked you for a threesome with another woman. Fucking find a man who respects you and cares about you, anon. Cuz this shit is just sad.

No. 135984

how much are you trying? sign up to every dating service you can and look for them on a daily basis. compile a large stack of potential bfs and narrow them down by the best suitor. what part of the region are you from btw?

No. 135985

Is it normal for all women to get "99+" tinder likes in about 10 minutes? not trying to brag. i've never used the app before, but i signed up using my sister's photo (she doesn't know, just for experiment to see what's it's like and what's out there, i don't intend on talking to anyone) and that's what I got in 10 minutes. I did widen my area to include multiple cities near me though, also i live in a big major city. I just often read on reddit about how men sign up and some are lucky to get just 1 match in a whole month. I only swiped right to the ones I actually like, and got around 10 matches and about 8/10 sent me a message first. this seems weirdly too good to be true, but if it is i'm really excited. i know the majority are going to be booty calls but still, that's a really wide net to find a good fish.

No. 135986

If you're pretty, yes. I got 400 in like half an hour. Men swipe on everything. They just swipe right endlessly

No. 135987

describe the toppest tier match you got? was he hot/rich/fit?

No. 135988

Can confirm. They are desperate and do not read profiles.

No. 135989

6'4 fit blond blue eyed Chad. we had dinner while traveling and he was a sweetheart but we live too far apart. I still miss him and anyone I like has some of his features. I'm gonna go cry now.

but yeah, I only swipe on guys that I find extremely attractive, because I know people use their best photos and are likely to look slightly worse in person.

No. 135995

There is such a thing as "fake likes" so they can sell you the premium/gold version. But yes, it's possible, men will swipe right on literally anyone (and then complain later like retards about women getting more matches)

No. 136002

>I live in a major city

It's mostly this.
When I lived in the depressed part of the country I used to get no dating app matches. Then I moved to a highly dense suburb near a city with thousands of people moving to the area every month, 99+ matches usually within a day. Boom.
Ditto what everyone else said about men shooting their shot to every woman though. That's why I only use a dating app for dinner and dick, I don't expect to find any special man on there cause none of em are thinking that way about women.

No. 136003

>That's why I only use a dating app for dinner and dick
Lmao sounds fun

After this lockdown shit is over, I plan on filling my schedule with Chads from dating apps and having some fun until I meet a genuine, HVM Chad away from an app.

No. 136004

me and my girlfriends' 1 year is coming up. i'm having trouble thinking of special things to do during quarantine. i can't buy her anything and we're limited to only doing things in my apartment. i want to do something more than make dinner together. any ideas?

No. 136006

You both sound pathetic

No. 136007

And you sound jealous, anon-kun.

No. 136009

what's the problem exactly?

No. 136015

File: 1586288168463.jpg (131.05 KB, 736x920, 7c636e5f2883b7e52e1a6c62c93981…)

I'm so sorry if this is way lame and not your thing but I think it could be super cute and romantic to build a blankets-and-pillows-fort inside and decorate with some cute lights and (fake) candles and watch movies or something.

congratz on your anniversary!

No. 136044

north-eastern US.
I have not tried at all frankly as dating sites depress me and I am not very photogenic.
everything is about appearance now

No. 136047

I have the same issue.

I can't find anyone. All the men here are absolutely disgusting and very low quality given how large this city is (London, UK). ANYWHERE I've been to in this world has had more attractive people, i don't know what's going on.

No. 136049

Jealous of what? Whoring yourself out for free meals? Anyone can do that except males, kek.

Libfems glorifying dumb shit.

No. 136058

Why are you so salty.
Its a cute idea especially being the fact they can't go out and celebrate

No. 136060

File: 1586319379029.jpg (90.73 KB, 1200x1252, Link reaction memes_328bb7_744…)

Anyone else tired of being an absolutely psychopathic and paranoid gf who has 0 trust in their partner for no reason

No. 136061

Why do you care? Only salty scrotes get pissy at the thought of a woman getting a free meal out of their bullshit. There's women who do it for men every day for free because they call her "girlfriend." Eat shit.

No. 136063

>only men care that women objectify themselves for food

No. 136065

Why's it so hard to find a guy that I find attractive and has some backbone/integrity?

I don't even care how much money they make or how tall they are.

No. 136066

Psychopathic is surely a strong word for whatever it is that you mean. A jealous type?

No. 136067

>women getting what they want is objectifying
>no comeback to the fact that women do sex for nothing in return all the time in "relationships"
I use the salt from scrote tears to season my free food chef kiss

No. 136082

How the fuck is whoring yourself out for food cute? Do you have brainworms?

How about you actually find a decent man instead of putting up with scrotes' bullshit for food in the first place? Like holy god damn shit, you'd rather please random men for $40 when you can just pop down at a nice restaurant on your own, and enjoy the meal on your own bullshit-free?

But no, you'd rather risk STDs, pregnancy, and on top of that he gets more physical pleasure out of the encounter than you do because men don't give a fuck about their casual lays. That is absolutely pathetic. Take better care of yourself.

No. 136085

>implying we fuck them after dinner

No. 136087

13 year relationship.
Many ups and downs.
Recently I gave up my high paying department head job and my home to move 500 miles so he can be near his family and feel better.
He is one of those fatalist "everyone/always noone/never" people.
We have not moved yet. I want to send him packing home and move down south to be with my sister.
He gets very loudly angry and yells while flailing his arms. I was severely abused as a child and this sends me into a meltdown.
He says he's lonely, but feels crowded. I think he wants out too but won't admit it. I wish I was brave enough to admit it to him.

No. 136088

Fuck's sake, I don't even plan on sleeping with them, I don't even necessarily want them to pay for my dinner. I just want to spend time with attractive men because flirting is fun.

>find a decent man

one day. until then, I'll have my fun.

No. 136089

You sound like you would be very uncomfortable doing those things, and that’s fine. But other women enjoy doing it and can look after themselves just fine. So to them it’s not putting up with bullshit, they’re having fun and getting perks at the same time. Seriously, this is the definition of projecting. You’re putting yourself in that anon’s shoes and reacting angrily as if it’s you in that position. Let hoes be hoes if it makes them happy and they know what they're doing.

No. 136092

this is literally the same logic that robots use about relationships, anon. this is how women get murdered.

No. 136097

honestly i dont even care about the sex part. doing the whole 'tee-hee i can get free food by going on random dates with dudes because im a woman' is embarrassing. framing it like its some kind of victory is just incorrect. you pretend its somehow empowering because you want to keep getting the short-term rewards. don't take advantage of other people.

No. 136099

ya'll took it too far. I just want to go on dates with attractive guys. i'm more than happy to pay my half.

No. 136104

Forget the relationship aspect at all, and see what this anon truly desires.
Gorging on vapid material experiences and meaninglessly satisfying her base senses. Degenerate men, luxury food, indiscriminate sex, all grotesque indulgences.

Why bother with criticism of a person like this, when it's obvious they are beyond guidance? Take this as a motivator for yourself and to strengthen your own resolve.

No. 136106

>degenerate men
who says I'm gonna meet degenerates?
>luxury food
oh c'mon anon, I have no desire for luxury food, and said several times I have no issue paying my share.
>indiscriminate sex
I only want to date, not sleep around

Maybe you were referencing someone else. I just want fun dates, to date around and gain experience around guys so I can learn what I want in a guy and tell when I've met the right one. Many people stick with one man for all their life because he's the first that they met.

No. 136110

Don't let that anon shame you. Make the man pay.

No. 136111

what I loved about dating european men (non western) is that they straight up don't let you pay, it's ridiculous to them and an insult. western men I've dated fucking eye you up as the bill arrives

No. 136112

Why do men have photos with their much more attractive friends on their dating profiles?

God guys are so terrible at online dating it's hilarious. The hottest guy I know has a SHIT profile, he's missing out on women because he can't put proper effort in.

No. 136114

He may be looking for women who aren't shallow

No. 136115

at the consequence of missing out on hot(ter) woman, I doubt it

No. 136116

You still don't know whether he cares about getting hot shallow women or not

No. 136117

You can be hot and a good person

No. 136122

Any anon with experience in long term relationships?
I'm going to be brief: my bf and I've been together for 4 years and we've moved on together for 1.2 years. Obviously we have some problems, nothing too bad. Just domestic stuff but we both have some communication problems (we both lonely and friendless losers 28 years olds). the problem is that even tho I absolutely love him and see a future with him, I have problems having sex with him. I'm attracted to him but sometimes when we are about to have sex, it takes me TOO long to get really aroused. He knows what I like so he does it but still, it's hard for me. I'm not in love with him anymore or what? does any anon have experienced something similar?

No. 136123

Mm I was in the same situation with an NEETish guy your age who was terrible at communicating. We dated for 3 years and moved in together at the end. To also keep things brief, the best advice I can give is to force yourselves to discuss this together regularly. I would usually prompt my ex to tell me if he thought we weren't having enough sex, and then use that to start a discussion about what we can try. One time it just turned out we needed to try a new lube because our old one was causing me discomfort so I started to have a negative association with sex. But I think I just don't like sex in general, so take this with a grain of salt.

No. 136124

I went out with asian men, korean/chinese/viet (not asian-american), and paying is natural for these men, they don’t even think about it. Even the broke college student, he doesn’t have a lot of money so he suggested we hit a bunch of street food spots and saw a local band. They feel it’s a privilege to go on a date with you, they just want you to have a good time. Not this pseudo-feminist numale shit in the west where going on a fucking dinner date felt like getting in debt and having pressured to pay in sex. Wild.

No. 136125

Exactly.. I feel like in the west men don't actually do it to be "feminist" or whatever, they just do it to benefit themselves and for social justice brownie points.

A guy I went out with wouldn't open the door for me because he thought I'd be "offended" as it would imply I'm not strong enough to do it myself. ffs

No. 136126


First of all it's normal to have periods of time when the libido is lower. Just communicate it openly. But as for more active attempts of facing it, obviously changing up things is something worth trying, routine is the biggest enemy. I don't know what your comfort zone is but roleplay is always good, even approached very lightly in a joke manner, not some serious acting. Or maybe trying to put an additional effort you normally wouldn't? I'm talking a long shower together, getting dressed up in something fancy, massages, general not straight-up sexual foreplay.
I hope you figure it out. :)

No. 136127

Maybe it’s an attempt at the “cheerleader effect”. Like a k-pop group, member who is 5/10 on their own but standing in a group he seems like 7/10.

No. 136134

Yeah I probably should've just said that. But it's really extreme. He has so many attractive female friends that kind of simp for him and it makes my blood boil. But every time I bring it up out of insecurity he gets mad at my lack of trust. I'm forced to just deal with my insecurity about it or argue with him/make him lose respect for me

No. 136135

>why don't you find a decent man?
Never thought of that anon! Lol. Because that requires a degree of emotional labor that I have no desire to entrust with a designated man right now. Relationships are tough work for women and most of it is thankless. I'd rather have my little dates and have fun with no pressure attached to it. I got out of a LTR of almost 4 years from a man who I loved but always took me for granted. Please stop acting like relationships necessarily protect women from being used and having their feelings hurt.
>putting up with scrotes' bullshit
I don't put up with any bullshit. And certainly way less than when I was a pickme begging on my hind paws for that 'decent man' you lectured me about to throw me a fucking bone.
>you'd rather please random men for $40
Please? Do you assume I kiss and have sex with anyone who asks? I pick and choose sis, if the guy bores me or doesn't turn me on then he doesn't get sex from me. End of. 
>you can go to a restaurant on your own
I do that sometimes too.
Sometimes I want romantic company.
>You'd rather risk STDs
I have a very high body count and don't have STDs. Meanwhile a very nice girl I met in grad school wound up with HPV from one scumbag boyfriend she dated who knowingly gave it to her, before she met her husband. Did she deserve it cause she 'risked' it by having sex with a man? No. Life's unfair and there's no guarantees. 
I have a nexplanon implant that has a better protection rate than sterilization. I've had it for 6 years and also got the added bonus of no periods. I'm good.
>on top of that he gets more physical pleasure
Well if you just let men use you like a starfish, sure. I make sure a man wants to do things that please me beforehand, don't you have those discussions? Sex would be pointless if I got zero pleasure from it, I don't give a damn what the man feels. 
>men don't give a fuck about their casual lays
Neither do I. That's why I'm not looking to husband them lmao.

Don't be mad.

Women specifically get murdered from dinner dates? Funny, most of the raped and murdered women I see in news articles were just carrying about their dailies without a thought in the world about men. Like women going out for jogs, or dancing at a bar with their girlfriends, or sitting at home in their houses.
Life is fucking unfair and nothing you do guarantees shit.

Lmao, mom?

>this is the definition of projecting
Agreed sis, thank you.

No. 136136

Then that's fine.

They're rewarding shitty men with sex. I don't care what you say, any man who has casual sex is inferior scum to begin with because they are looking to use women.

Lmao, relationships don't take emotional labor from the woman unless you just suck at choosing men. Which at that point you shouldn't be fucking random dudes because you have poor judgement.

>I have a nexplanon implant that has a better protection rate than sterilization.

Imagine fucking up your hormones and body just to get fucked by random dudes. That is really the ultimate pick me act. Something really messed up your brain to the point where you think getting used by shitty guys is better than having a devoted partner who actually cares for you and would do anything for you. No, I don't care if you get "pleasure" from it or whatever, he still sees you as a cheap, easy lay and looks down on you along with the 50 other men you fucked.

No. 136137

>relationships don't take emotional labor from the woman
Why are you chewing me about anything when you've clearly never been in a relationship before to think emotional labor never happens? I'm getting embarrassed for you.
>you get nothing from your birth control implant besides fucked up hormones!
Well also the part where I don't have to deal with the cost and pain of periods, and it made my adult acne better. But sure anon, you know more about my life than I do.

You scrote? You're behaving like a scrote, which is way more pathetic than even the most degenerate thots who've sucked 10,000 dicks.

No. 136138

>Why are you chewing me about anything when you've clearly never been in a relationship before to think emotional labor never happens? I'm getting embarrassed for you.
Have you only been with manbabies? Because otherwise there is no emotional labor. Unless you consider listening to the person and helping occasionally to be labor, in which case, you shouldn't be with them.

>Well also the part where I don't have to deal with the cost and pain of periods, and it made my adult acne better.

You're still fucking up your hormones and it will have long-term effects you absolute retard.

No. 136139

No. 136140


Christ, why are you so invested into her business? Stop sperging like a retard, you don't pay her bills, she's safe, protects herself and doesn't harm anybody. Totally projecting.

No. 136141

Because this is the relationship thread. She could've posted her shit in the sex work thread instead.(infighting)

No. 136142

Not a prostitute. Have a decent day job or did my mention of that friend being someone I met at grad school not clue you in? You're assblasted.

No. 136144


God how is it even related to sex work? I believe that she talked about her experiences and relationships with men, so it kinda belongs to the topic. What's so wrong with dating around if both parties involved are ok with it, do their thing in private, and are safe? What harm is done here?

You're so pressed about it for absolutely no reasons, it's beyond me lmfao. Ah, whatever.

No. 136145

Reminder that infighting is highly penalized on this board, and it is hellweek. Feel free to report excessive infighting.

No. 136192

anonette, do you have any side effects from nexplanon?

I really hate having periods, and pretty much everything gives me side effects. I also do a lot of sport and lift weights, and the lowered testosterone from the pill is something I wasn't happy with.

I also have a huge fear of pregnancy, I don't want kids at all and I don't trust condoms.

No. 136204

>A guy I went out with wouldn't open the door for me because he thought I'd be "offended"
Wtf, the state of western men. Although I totally believe they purposely do this shit to be lazy and conveniently blame the "feminists".

No. 136210

Yeah cuz eastern men are so much better right…they're worse lmao look at all the sexism and problems they have.

No. 136214

Appetite increase and weight gain but I'm sure if you're sporty you'll manage it better than I did. People get different side effects sometimes so I don't want to get your hopes up but I've really liked what this implant did for me. Before I got it I was always very anxious about accidents.

No. 136215

Literally no one said that. Just that aspect of dating retard, westfags are just as sexist but they dress it up as progressive or whatever

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