/sty/ - pigsty

>>2176
I've been in the same boat, anon. I tend to fantasize about youtubers because they're more "relatable" than other celebs and because I just don't have a ton of intimacy in my own life. I'm not really interested in dating or anything, at least not right now, so I just leave it to fantasy. It hasn't taken over my life in a destructive way or anything so I just let it happen tbh.

>start playing Sims 4 as a distraction from severe depression
>make perfect Sim husbando because I'm lonely and IRL relationship isn't great
>develop legit crush on him over time
>make depression worse over the fact that he's not real

How the fuck did I sink this low? At least your crush is a real dude, OP.

>>2183
It's okay anon. I know this feel for imaginary men. Because your relationship IRL isn't great that's probably why you've latched unto it and while it seems really dumb, it's not, really.

What's wrong with your relationship atm?

>>2186
Thanks, anon. My relationship has been pretty rocky for the past 3 years. There have been so many problems that I don't even know where to start, but our problems basically boil down to my boyfriend not being honest with me in the past about stupid stuff, gaslighting me when I called him out, and a lack of intimacy and affection on his part because I had gained weight when my mother got sick/passed away and he wasn't attracted to me sexually anymore. I pretty much ran myself into the ground trying to fix everything by myself simply because he couldn't be honest about how he felt/what he wanted.

It pretty much killed my self-esteem and trust in him, yet I stayed with him all this time because I was scared of being alone since he was the only person left in my life. Eventually, I finally got through to him that his bullshit was killing our relationship, and he's been breaking his back trying to fix things in every way he can. I told him this is his last shot before I throw in the towel. Despite his efforts to change, I feel so guarded and don't like when he gets too close. I worry that too much time has passed, and that things can't be repaired because of all the emotional damage that's been done.

I guess when you look at it logically, the whole Sims thing isn't really dumb, but it makes me feel pathetic as hell. I'm no stranger to joking about having anime husbandos and stuff, but I guess this feels different because it's something I actually created, indulge in, and turn to when I feel lonely. It's sad that a character in a game has made me feel more loved and attractive than my real boyfriend. I wish my boyfriend was as kind and romantic as him. I miss feeling important and desired.

Thanks for listening and letting me talk about it. I don't have any friends or family anymore, so it's nice to find support on lolcow.

>>2188
I think it's a good sign that he WANTS to change, though, and is actively trying to. Men who don't want to put in that effort just won't because, well, they're stubborn.

But I think you also have to do a little work too maybe to kinda let your guard down and try to just let him love you / love him and not dwell on the past stuff. It's really hard, though. That past emotional baggage of him not being honest is difficult to get rid of but if you really want to move on, it might be best to try to let it go and focus on the fact he does want to change.

As to that all important 'feeling special/attractive' thing, we all chase that when we've been with someone a long time and I did too until I realised that if I put in a little effort to make my husband feel special, he was actually more likely to do the same. I saw a big improvement in terms of his reactions to what I was wearing, saying I looked beautiful, etc etc, when I was giving him the same and showing him affection in a way he understands. If you start doing that and you're not getting anything back, then yeah, this relationship isn't worth the effort you're putting into it and it's a drain to you.

I hope that helps. I'm sorry about your mom. I know I would be pretty beside myself and gaining weight and stuff is really understandable. Grief/depression cause those spanner in the works of just every day life and motivation. It'll get easier in time, hopefully.

>>2189
Thanks a bunch for your advice and support. I really appreciate it a lot.

I know it's not fair to keep him at a distance. It's been difficult because my father was abusive and a pathological liar, so he pretty much set me up for a lifetime of trust issues. It pissed me off that my boyfriend would continually lie to me, knowing how important trust is because of my childhood abuse.

As for me pulling my own, I've always showered him with compliments, did romantic/cute stuff for him, and never "let myself go", other than gaining about 30 lb. like I mentioned before. I've never been a high maintenance person in terms of dress or makeup, so it's not like I suddenly changed for the worst. That's why it made me so angry when he basically told me that he lost attraction to me about a year after us dating because I didn't look like X,Y, and Z. You know, why date me if you didn't like how I looked right off the bat?

I'm really working on opening up again and have been in therapy for a few months, so I hope that helps in the long run. I really am glad that he's putting in some much effort to finally fix things.

>>2176

It's okay op, I don't this is crazy to like them.

I have a huge crush on a girl in one of my classes. She comes off extremely stand offish and snobby, especially when the instructor was giving introductions and she exclaimed "You know I hate art people"

>This is literally art school
>This was a studio class when she said this
>Everyone went quite
>awkward for her after because we had to get other classmates numbers as a requirement and nobody went up to her but due to her very confident personality she just asked me and two other people for it.

Personality wise I just think she is forward/blunt and due to artzskoolz everyones pretty much an introvert. Intially I thought i just admired her a lot, since she's everything I'm not

>Have long think black hair to her back
>gives off sex appeal without trying
>extremely confident
>Can just say whats on her mind

But I'm pretty sure I'm just crushing hard at this point.

Yesterday she went out of her way to sit next to me, I didn't think much of it since why wouldn't you sit next to people who you go your numbers from the class before?

But she legitimately was nice and warm to me, and complimented me on my work. I don't think she swings that way and even if she did I hardly doubt I'm her type. She makes me want to turn in amazing homework each time so I can hear praise from her though.

My friend has a hot neighbor I've been secretly in love with for years. We chat here and there but I don't think I'll ever have the balls to ask him out.

I have a huge crush on a really popular person in the undertale nsfw community.
He is like the top producer of smut
But he lives in another country, out of my league, has thousands of people in line swooning for them.
Classic case of senpai will never notice me.

I always get the mega hots for random strangers on the street and sometimes I can't stop thinking about them for a few days while having kinky, fucked up fantasies about them. While doing this, I learned that I have the oddest taste in men. I've crushed on a security guard who straight up looked like he was a nerd from the 70s, a cashier who looked like he was from the 1800s, any guy with super long hair even if they're ugly, a tall asian pharmacist with the deepest voice ever, and another security guard who looks average and a bit like Sam Hyde. Kill me tbh

>tfw I cant like any band without having huge crushes the main singer/songwriter

It would be ok if I was into like… boy bands. But most of them are old folk/rock singers who aren't attractive and are already married

>>2243
The only sensible experience.

Everyone else
>Muh celebrity

>>2353
This person's crush ( >>2243 ) isn't retarded and I'm sure it's most likely possible to evolve depending on the circumstances. She doesn't have the balls to ask him out. Talking about it in the thread is absolutely okay and fine but the main topic isn't that.

So all other posts aren't >muh celebrity.
They're actually what the OP post is about: impossible/retarded crushes.

>>2360
yeah man he had one of those curly staches like in this pic but it was more kempt and perfect. he looked like he had time traveled to current day. he kept staring at me and i genuinely got chills when i looked at him, it was really odd. he was young, tall, and super handsome tho so i would still tap that hipster ass.

>>2371
I think that according to the current trends your guy would be classified a hipster

>>2176
I'm falling head over heels for my co-worker. No surprise since we spend 8+ hours alone in the same office every single day tho.
But it's pretty sad and shitty of me to feel this way because i have a boyfriend and he has a girlfriend as well.
My boyfriend however is only interested in videogames and often says i talk too much. I'm very passionate about my career while he doesn't really care about anything other than food, videogames and memes. Basically a manchild. We've been together for years but while i grew up and moved on in life he kinda stayed the same idiotic teenager. An endearing idiotic teenager tho.
This other guy however, we can spend hours on end talking about books, life, art and human emotions, i've learned a lot from him and even tho i've read a lot less than him he actually listens to me and reflects on what i say like it's important. He's very passionate, humble, sensitive, super smart, is 8 years older than me and his girlfriend is beautiful.
I feel so stupid writing this.
Sometimes i think he also has a bit of a crush on me, but it's probably just my emotions making it up, he's just gentleman-like. He drives me to the subway station every day and drives me home if it's dark outside (we often have to work overtime). One time he called me by his gf's name by accident but our names are similar to begin with.
I'd never act on it tho, and i know he'd never cheat on his girlfriend either. I tried forgetting about it and moving on but it's been almost a year since i started working there and i like him more than ever. I'm okay with it just being fantasy, but it'd just be amazing if it was his impossible guilty fantasy as well. Then it wouldn't just be this one sided platonic thing but rather a complicated painful feeling we shared.

Sorry for long post + bad english. I haven't had the courage to talk about this with anyone. I feel really really stupid writing all of this tbh. I'm just trying to enjoy human relationships for what they are. I think that unattainable crushes are a beautiful part of life and that platonic love is best love.

>>2423
Yeah, Im op and wasn't sure where I should make it because I thought this topic could be shared in the other thousands threads about shame, rants and confessions that were going on when I made it. Im gonna ask farmhands to move it, not sure if they will tho.

Moved to >>>/g/55352.