[ Rules ] [ ot / g / m ] [ pt / snow / w ] [ meta ] [ Discord ]

/ot/ - off-topic

Name
Email
Subject
Comment
File
Youtube
Password
(For post deletion)

Welcome former PULL users!
Click here to start migrating to our sister forum
Farmhand applications are open

File: 1599189603091.png (118.21 KB, 275x275, 1597743050349.png)

No. 622665

Last thread >>>/ot/614253

Release your inner anguish

No. 622674

feel like shit all i do is play vidya all day cuz i'm too afraid to leave my room bc i live with my boyfriends family and am scared of them judging me

No. 622677

>>622674
Bitch get a job and stop caring what other ppl think

No. 622679

File: 1599191801273.gif (4.95 MB, 300x300, 98C27A4C-856F-48C5-B880-A05C3B…)

i'm so done. my teeth chipped a bit now im even uglier, and can no longer smile. i can't afford a dentist right now. please end my life. should just sell feet pic to make money for a dentist idk, shit sucks.

No. 622682

>>622679
uhm anon I think people with chipped teeth are unironically cute, please post a pic

No. 622700

loud noises and loud people fucken piss me off so much i swear one day im going to be that person who goes to jail because i fucken stabbed someone over the tv volume and their unecessary stupid comments they make.

No. 622702

>>622700
It's the autism, anon.

No. 622706

>>622679
Don’t feel bad anon, unless it physically effects you with pain you should be fine.

No. 622707

File: 1599194714096.gif (50.72 KB, 220x165, mikucryingnor (1).gif)

I was just listening to old vocaloid songs I used to listen to in the 2010's and I got so depressed. I miss the days where I was so happy dancing in my room for hours upon hours on end to World is Mine and Po Pi Po, learning the lyrics to Hello, How are You? and crying over Reboot like a happy little weeb. Now I feel like that old scene has died out and most of the people who listened to and loved that era of Vocaloid have completely forgotten about it, the newer music just doesn't have as much inspiration and amazing story-telling, and it's reminded me of how fast time passes. I would give anything to go back to that time and just be a happy little idiot teenager for a while. Pic absolutely related

No. 622709

People come and vent here on the vent thread and then people come here and get pissed about such vents, like, why? why even? just let people vent in peace kek

No. 622715

>>622707
same. wish i could go back but being an adult fan of anything will never beat the feeling of being an idiot weeb in middle school finding cute, cool, catchy or edgy vocaloid songs and thinking they’re the absolute peak of music. sigh.

No. 622716

File: 1599196737313.gif (493.25 KB, 496x279, 1391203998831.gif)

Man, working sucks ass.

Me and my bf are starting new jobs, so our scheduling's a little weird/busy. Tomorrow our mutual friend invited us to watch a movie at like 8pm but my bf said to me that he needs like an hour or two to decompress after he leaves work at 7 (he starts at 11am) so he's not coming. But, like, come at 9 then?? He could've also asked his chill managers to accommodate since it wasn't super last minute. My previous long-term, relationship fucking exploded bc we never hung out unless it was like around midnight cause I worked so much, and eventually he never wanted to hang out with me anyway since "we live together so we don't need to." I'm crying so much atm… it's embarrassing that I'm still letting it affect me this way even though my bf is an angel and this objectively shouldn't be a big deal.

God, I didn't before but now I'm having so many doubts above moving in with him next month. He's trying to make me feel better but I don't know what to say.

No. 622729

I wish I could enjoy more carefree moments in my relationship with my partner, he has a lot of wonderful qualities, but he suffers from frequently reocurring false memories which negatively impact his sense of trust in people. I don't know what I can do to support him. Showing him evidence that contradicts the narrative of his false memories doesn't really help. It's become stressful for me because it feels like a dark cloud is often hanging over our heads. I guess I should probably break up with him, it's just so hard because I love him deeply and we rely on each other in many ways.

No. 622742

>>622716
Sage for samefag, we talked it out on the phone and I feel so much better now. He even sang to cheer me up. I feel so lucky to have this affectionate person looking out for me and understanding my dark moments.

No. 622743

Today I woke up and cried. Had a huge fight with bf yesterday and now I'm going to my mom's (unrelated to the fight) for almost a month to keep hep dogs while she's not here.

Yesterday he made me feel naggy for being disppointed and bowling my eyes out because after months of (mostly me) talking mariage, he was apathetic at best. I would have taken a FUCKING no and changed my plans accordly, but nope, he looked "kinda" on board.
He "offered" me something that was something HE liked and I noped that bs, said he was fucking selfish and lazy and to get me something else I like (we've been together 10+, how hard could it be? I got him a pendant with meaning in the firt 5-6month of our relationship and he's still wearing it).
He made me gave him a fucking ultimatum, making myself hate even more for being a fucking cliché cunt.
He finally got a necklass right. It made me happy for a day. And then it dawned on me that I shouln't have to fucking scream and cry to get a proof we're together for realsies.
I just wanted a trinket and him on one knee asking not jockingly ffs. I feel so cheated and sad.

Now I'm the villain, apparently I only say this stuff because I'm tired (I am, really tired, and tired of his antics) and that there are "ton of other thing he does for me I neveraknowledge".
He tried to bargain and gaslight until I ultimately said just plain NO, ok, you win. No marriage. Ok, no symbolic bond (it has no symbolism to him, of course). I said I'll stay for the time being but if I'm not married to him, maybe I'll choose another guy over the next few years, because if you're not married, tha't how it is, right?

So yeah. Kinda need a hug nonnie. I know I'm stupid. I know I shouldn't have hoped anything from a man. But I'm so fucking sad and dispppointed.
I guess it's true I'm the only one that can myself me happy.
I'll find a really nice piece of jewelry and just buy it myself. Maybe that'll help the sadness and disappointement. Or maybe something else that won't make me think about being this miserable.

No. 622745

>>622743
Anon I"m sending you hugs during your tough time and hope you feel better but I gotta be honest, I read that whole post twice and have no idea what you're saying.

The only thing I think I correctly understood is that he tried to gift you a piece of jewelry but you threw a fit and told him to go get you something different because you hated it, which is honestly not how you should act if someone tries to give you a gift. If he was hurt he has a right to be, maybe you should just reach out and make up?

No. 622747

File: 1599202332258.jpg (62.19 KB, 720x980, FB_IMG_1597171646172.jpg)

I can't sleep unless I count my inhales and exhales or else I will start thinking too much (usually about my parents dying) and a breakdown, start crying and such. If I get distracted for even 2 seconds it's this all over again. It's so exhausting. This has happened 3 times tonight already. I wish I could sleep normally again.

No. 622751

>>622745
NTA, seems like the jewelry thing is just symbolic of anon's real issue - that they've been together 10 years and he doesn't seem to have any interest in marrying her. And she has every right to be concerned tbh.

>>622743
Don't get stuck being a forever gf anon. If he doesn't want to commit and marriage is important to you, you need to seriously reevaluate your relationship. I can't imagine being in that situation because that's a long ass fucking time but you shouldn't have to cajole him into marrying you. He should want it too.

No. 622752

>>622729
Can you give an example of those "false memories"?

No. 622753

My boyfriend keeps liking this one womans instagram pictures and I know that I shouldn't be jealous because we've been in a relationship for over 5 years but I still feel like I want to burn that bitches hair and skin off and then feed her to the pigs.

No. 622754

>>622753
Is she just someone online or actually someone he knows irl?

Either way if you’re having those emotions they should be directed at him

No. 622756

>>622745
I was rambly, sorry.
He got me a first necklass (I don't like rings). It was a necklass about something HE only likes and I don't care about (and he knows it).
I know I sounds like a 5 yo and that he tried and shit, and that you should be gracious about gift.
But it was a 20/30€ necklass (again didn't care about the price) but it's fucking reasonnable. It was supposed to be my engagement gift.

But honestly, after all of this, it was just too much. He could have gotten me a cheap pendant of a cat and that would have been awesome. But he chose somehting symbolic to HIM (and only him and he knew it) (also apparently pendant have symbolism but not marriage).

Maybe I'm throwing a real tantrum and I'm asking too much? Is that it nonnie? I don't even know. It just hurt so bad.

No. 622757

>>622743
Why would you tell someone that they're "fucking selfish and lazy" for giving you a gift you didn't like? That's a big no-no for me, but I guess it depends on what the gift was. I see your yearning for love and commitment after 10 years in a relationship with this guy, but… are you always this insolent? I feel like there's more going on here. You two need to try to communicate without these unexpressed expectations and wishes and without calling eachother names.

No. 622760

>>622754

She is the twin sister of his friends ex-girlfriend. There is no good reason why he should be liking her pictures. Thankfully she lives really far away. I also noticed that she also likes his pictures with the exception of the ones I am in.

No. 622761

>>622756
My best advice is to put it all out there. Don't expect him to know what you want, tell him. Tell him what you just told us, without yelling or name calling, that marriage is very important to you, that he seems to be on the fence about it, how it hurts you and ask him to talk to you about his feelings regarding marriage. Try to do it calmly, but be honest with him. Tell him that you feel completely disregarded.
If you don't reach a conclusion that leaves you both feeling closer and more understood or he doesn't want to work through it at all, it might be time to consider ending the relationship.

No. 622762

>>622756
Anon, my sympathies go out to you, but if you have to coerce someone into a marriage, that marriage is doomed to fail. It seems you've come to a point in your relationship where you need to decide exactly what will make you happy and move forward from there. If marriage is important to you but not important to him, it may be time to decide whether a.) You're willing to move forward with the relationship with no expectations of marriage but try to make it healthy and happy or b.) End the relationship and move forward with your life and pursue a relationship where you and your partner have similar values.

Also it really isn't right for you to lash out at him just because you didn't like the jewelry he gifted you, it comes across as spoiled and immature behavior and if I were him, I'd be upset too. My ex gave me a gift while we were together that had a correlation with Harry Potter, and even though I don't care about Harry Potter I still cherished it because it was something he saw, thought was beautiful and thought would look lovely on me.

No. 622765

>>622752
Paranoid stuff, like that he's overheard our friends talking bad about him or that he's being targeted by a malevolent unknown stalker (both extremely unlikely scenarios). Sometimes he will have memories of really banal details too that are also totally falsified. I can't just tell him "you create memories of events that never happened, they stem from your anxieties relating to childhood trauma", because he will feel he's being gaslighted.

No. 622766

>>622762
You're right. He never gives me gifts and I respect that (it's just not who he is) but I just wanted him to make a tiny effort so I would feel like he gets me? At least for this one big occasion.

Idk. I guess I can't explain it more and yes, I probably have thrown a tantrum now that I look at it your way (It wasn't really the only thing going on but still not a excuse).
I'll try to be less of a spoiled brat in the future.
Thx for advice nonnie, I really needed the perspective.

No. 622769

i'm 600 kilometres away from my ex's dirty floors, empty life and unseasoned pasta meals. until i can make friends here, i wish he could come be my rental bf in the meantime. he really wasn't bad aside from those things…

No. 622777

I'm slowly getting to the point where I can't handle people who don't have their lives together. I got laid off in June, now I'm about to start a new job. I did that by literally making applying to jobs my job. It was absolutely miserable especially since I knew I was competing with people with double my experience willing to do a job at my level because they have kids or whatever.

I finally got a job, actually a fantastic step up from my last job, yet I have friends older than me who complain about being stuck in their retail jobs yet won't even submit an application to a job that sure, maybe will be just as miserable, but at least it PAYS MORE. Then they have the audacity to tell me how lucky I am. Lucky! As if I didn't pay for my own university and take out loans for what I couldn't cover and work my ass off to get to where I am while half of these fuckers dropped out of college/uni even though their parents were paying for everything. I'm not lucky. I just work hard. The trick is to keep fucking smiling instead of focusing on every failure.

The worst is when you get the people who can't even not keep their mouths shut when they hear about your new job talking about how they could never do the office life. Well I could never do the begging for money on Twitter because I'm a "professional" artist who can't get anyone to spend $20 on a full color commission because my art is so damn ugly life, but you don't see me saying that out loud (well, except right now but I'm civil normally I promise).

I think I just need to cut it all out. This has been more of a ramble than a vent. Sorry.

No. 622796

>>622766
I don't know why everyone is giving you so much shit. It sounds like this guy doesn't respect you very much and is jerking you around by not giving you a straight answer in regards to marriage. Maybe you're not acting in a way that serves your best interests, but it makes sense that you'd be upset and lash out given his treatment toward you. You're only human.

No. 622799

>>622760
>There is no good reason why he should be liking her pictures.
I had something similar happen to me. It was really eating me away, so finally I sat my bf down, told him I feel insecure especially because I'm seeing her liking only the pictures that exclude me, he understood my worry, said he didn't even think much about it and didn't realize it may look like this, but undrestood my worries and suggested himself he can delete her from his friends if I prefer.
tl;dr try being very open and communicate how exactly you feel, being a "cool girl" that never gets jealous is very self destructive. Hope it works out ok!

No. 622831

Uni is starting soon again and I’ll have to endure another semester online. I had a terrible experience last semester so I’m really not looking forward to it. I’ve been home for too long. I’ve been having high anxiety for the past few days because I’m so worried and nervous. I can’t even eat properly. Hope I’ll feel better soon.

No. 622835

>>622760
this >>622799 is the best advice, so seconding it by suggesting you tell him it make you feel insecure. 9 times out of 10 guys really don't realise how it looks, so give him the opportunity to fix the problem before it builds into something much bigger.

No. 622838

>>622777
I feel this. I worked my ass off to get through university and to create a career for myself, stressed to the point I'm surprised I didn't start balding but I made it and now I have a position where I'm paid extremely well. The salary of course comes with responsibility and sometimes un-paid overtime. Yet I got people my age constantly being jealous of me and making snarky remarks about me being spoiled and privileged. God, while I was sweating through the mud verging on a mental breakdown you lazy fucks were busy playing video games and enjoying your time being hedonistic slackers while mommy wired you money every time you were in a trouble so you didn't have to take responsibility.

>The worst is when you get the people who can't even not keep their mouths shut when they hear about your new job talking about how they could never do the office life.

This is such a cope for them. I worked underpaid shit retail jobs before and I'm much happier in a stuffy office than going through that hell again. And I don't have to sacrifice my self-respect to e-beg people because I spent the last $400 I had on shitty merchandise I'm going to get bored of in 6 months.

No. 622839

I'm on my period, everything fucking sucks, I don't want to work.
I just wanna fucking cry. This is awful. I'm on ADs ffs, aren't those supposed to numb you the fuck out. We just doubled the dose? I should be a robot by now, not a human fontain ugly crying about stupid shit.

No. 622851

>>622839
Periods do suck! Idk what medication you're on but I find on pms or during my period I can never get properly high. Hormones are a bitch I wish you well

No. 622852

File: 1599219208792.jpg (117.98 KB, 750x432, 20200207_230048.jpg)

I'm having a really rough day and I know it will pass but it still sucks.

I feel so unlovable right now. I'm a poor fuck with a dead end job, bpd fag that lives at home and despite trying isn't going anywhere in life. I told myself I'll try my best to fix my life until I'm 30, if it doesn't work then I'll just off myself. I've got 4.5 more years to go and am trying hard but not acomplishing shit and since I don't have anything worth offering I feel like I can't date. Not to mention I don't want kids and have a preference for women, which makes this x times more difficult. I just fucking hate everything right now.

No. 622863

Day 2 of having no water. They're changing the main water pipe in the neighbourhood, it's a necessary upgrade but a pain in the ass until it's done. They turn the water off at dawn and only turn it back on in the evening. It wouldn't bother me as much if we weren't in the middle of a pandemic. I just want to be able to tend to my hygiene properly, waaaah!

No. 622884

My biggest fear in life was no getting a degree and having to struggle for the rest of my life living in a shitty apartment and constantly moving out once the landlord doesn't want me there anymore and only having £50 at the end of the month. My fears are becoming realty. I've completely failed university and I've only discovered I probably have adhd and there's nothing I can do about it. I hate myself so much for listening to my parents who kept pushing me to finish university, when I could have gone when I was ready and could have done well. I will never have 18,000 to be able to get a degree. My life is over, I have too much social problems to try and get my own income. I want to die. I hate my family, me and my shit life. This isn't the life I wanted. I want it to end.

No. 622886

I was playing league with my boyfriend and friend and noticed my ADC was a girl so I invited her to play w us. I was so fucking awkward and too scared of playing bad that I ended up playing like shit. Man, all I want is a female friend to play games with but yeah I somehow feel like a fucking incel who is unable to talk to women

No. 622891

>>622886
league is super fucking lame.

No. 622893

>>622886
Which server are you on?

No. 622894


No. 622916

I realized I gained back all the weight I lost in the spring and I want to die lmfao why am I such a slob and how do I even manage to gain weight at such a rapid rate???

No. 622928

I'm ranting to you girls YET again because I honestly trust this place a lot.

In a university club I am in, there's a couple people I met that I do a D&D group with. A few of them are regulars, some I just see when we play D&D. Within the uni club, there's been new comers, which is always welcome but someone else has joined and is getting rather chummy with someone in the D&D group. I wouldn't care so much except for a lingering vibe that feels 'off' about this guy. I feel annoyed by his presence even though he hasn't done anything wrong. Somethings he does, such as repeating rules that have already been said and long and dirty fingernails are my only grievences. Just today at the uni club, he gave my D&D friend some maps for the group and wants to guest. It's a nice gesture but I cannot find any apprecition or gratitude that I would of found if anyone else bought them. I almost want to tell my group 'this guy feels off, do not let him play'. No one else seems to have an issue with him, which makes me feel bad for feeling this way. I'm probably being a huge bitch but I cannot shake this weird vibe off of him. What it is that would be an issue isn't known.

No. 622930

>>622894
Aww, I play on EUW.

No. 622938

My boyfriend is gaining weight from working too much, sleep deprivation and eating shitty foods, and just being lazy when he gets off work . I'm not attracted to it.
When I got with him he had a dad bod in the muscle way. He was 19 so he could be like that while eating junk and being less active. Now it's catching up and i keep trying to get him to go running with me or some shit but he's so burnt out from work? I love him but I just get less and less attracted to him as he gains weight.
What do anons?

No. 622941

>>622938
tell him you're losing your sexual attraction to him. He needs to change his diet to lose weight and honestly, if he doesn't want to, you should consider other options. People that don't care about their health aren't worth the energy.

No. 622944

File: 1599231371801.png (1.22 MB, 1080x1079, Screenshot_2020-07-17-14-59-17…)

Im fucking pregnant and getting an abortion next week. Having trouble deciding on a method… Any anons got exp?

No. 622945

>>622928
Yes, you are a huge bitch

No. 622946

>>622886
Don’t give up!!! I was literally in your seat and have finally found one girl to play with who’s not only good at the game but she’s so fucking sweet and funny. it wasn’t easy tho and it was so fucking awkward to ask “hey are you a girl?” Because there’s no way to ask it without sounding like a mouth breathing incel but now we play together quite often and even talk on discord! Good luck to you! If you find out a player is a girl then there’s a 80% chance she’s also hoping to find some girl to play with!

No. 622948

>>622944
If you're under 6 weeks the pill option will be easier on you and cheaper. Years ago I got an abortion but I was already at 8 weeks so I was given only the surgical option. I was young and scared as fuck but the doctors and the nurses were really nice, they went with full anesthesia and according to my ex it took only 15 minutes for me to leave the waiting room then come back while I felt I slept for hours.
Get ready to bleed for a month tho, no tampons/cups or sex allowed.

No. 622949

I wish I could snap my fingers and kill every man I have interacted with sexually and romantically.

No. 622951

>>622938
Regardless of your attraction to him, that lifestyle isn't good for himself nor is it good for you. Do you live together?
Just tell him you're concerned because you see that he isn't eating right and seems more tired and it's not doing it for you anymore. Unless he's ordering out, make it so there's no junk food he could eat in the house and urge him to go on walks with you. Exercise may help his sleep regulation. If nothing else changes you're going have to be blunt and tell him you aren't attracted to him anymore unless there's effort being made.

>>622944
Do the pill. For some reason this anon >>622948 was lucky with her surgical option. On both occasions when I've had a surgical abortion, I felt pain even with so-called intravenous pain relief. I never got knocked out, maybe the places I went were sadistic idk. Whereas the pill is basically a period.

No. 622955

I need more friends irl my only friend is my ex and I keep having the stupid urge to vent to him. Basically my anger as a result of us both thinking we were trans in the past and other shit.. I'm trying to apply the same disdain for him that anons have for AGP weebs but he's really a good person. Idk why i feel the need to blow this shit up on him years after.. Guess I hate that part of his past, scared for him to never see what I see, but he still means a lot to me should I just let it go? I need other friends lol

No. 622956

>>622949
Teach me your ways if you ever gain this invaluable skill

No. 622957

>>622951
>both occasions when I've had a surgical abortion
Nta and this might sound dumb but does having it done multiple times affect your ability to carry a preganancy later?

No. 622962

>>622949
There's a few that I would spare. Much as I vent about men on here, it's a mixed bag for me.

I have one ex where everytime I hear about a car crash fatality in his area I check the article and hope that it's him. Not just because he abused me but because word got back to me that he's abusing someone else right now. And there's kids in that house stuck witnessing it.

No. 622965

I can stand period pain, I lived with that shit for 16+ years and I'm used to it even if I want to die every time.
But ovulation pain? Seriously? Why does my body hate me so much?

No. 622966

>>622957
Nope. The only way it would is if you've had scarring from malpractice or not taking the antibiotics afterward and getting an infection. It's like asking if pregnancy and childbirth affect your ability to get pregnant again in the future. Maybe if you've had a traumatic injury and infection, but otherwise nah. Your body goes through way more traumatic shit giving birth than having an abortion.

Anecdotal evidence, but I know I can get pregnant after having those surgical abortions because I got pregnant again after those and opted for a pill abortion which was way easier. I've been on really potent bc for the past several years so I couldn't tell you now, but maybe if I get it removed and try for a planned pregnancy with my current bf, I will let you know results.

No. 622969

>>622966
Ah ok. I just wondered because I had cervical cancer, had a procedure on my cervix recently and was surprised when they warned me about it possibly affecting my abiity to carry.

No. 622975

>>622969
That's different because that has to do with your actual cervix.
When you have an abortion or childbirth, your cervix needs to dilate and contract but other than that there's not much else to do with it during those matters.

No. 622982

>>622743
The fuck? Do you have a bunch of femcels and LARPers replying to you lol
You’ve been with this scrote for 10 years sucking and fucking him but not only does he not want to commit to you, just keeping you on the hook. He went out of his way to throw you a passive aggressive ass 20€ “”””gift“””, literal bone, only after you got upset???
>>622766
>He never gives me gifts and I respect that (it's just not who he is) but I just wanted him to make a tiny effort so I would feel like he gets me? At least for this one big occasion.
You’re settling so fucking hard it’s depressing. It’s supposed to be an engagement gift but it is literally something my 14 year old boyfriend gave me in high school. He’ll give you a ring pop in church because it’s meaningful ??

Time to start planning a different route anon. This man has gotten too used to your low maintenance nature for a decade, he is not going to change. You will not be able to ask for anything without it upsetting his comfy zero effort idea of a relationship. He’ll resent you more every day. Thank god you’re not married.

No. 622983

The dinner I worked so hard to prepare last night for bf and I turned out to be a complete disaster and I'm still salty about it. Normally I'm a very good cook, it's my first failure in awhile and ofc it's gotta happen when I'm trying to feed someone other than myself.
My beef roast came out tough. Cheap cut + motherfucker bled even though I let it rest + I cut against the grain accidentally bc I felt rushed to serve food since my bf made a comment about not typically eating so late (and it was very late). We barely ate it, I horked down a slice but he apologized bc he couldn't finish his, said it reminded him of his mother's roast meats (and she cooks poorly so omfg). This was the first roast he claims he had in years and it was nasty and chewy. My stupid roasted vegetables barely fucking cooked because they were difficult faggots for no good reason. I threw them in the microwave and stirred them around trying to speed up the cook time, only for it to become wholly unappetizing because the purple carrots stained the other veggies (bf made a comment that it looked like blood..). I attempted to make gravy because I could tell the roast was gonna be leather, half of the drippings spilled on the floor. I used way too much flour and a lot of water and worstechire and wine to compensate. It was thick like pudding, and tangy from the wine. Just gross.
The entire dinner was a trainwreck. Had he not gorged on the leftover garlic bread I made from the other night while we waited hours for this shit dinner to roast, I would have taken him to McDonald's because he would have been so hungry.

I managed not to rage but I wanted to take that pathetic fucker roast in one fist and slam it into the wall. I'm heated and livid just thinking about that worthless slampig I slaved over for nothing.
Now I have a bunch of tough meat. I was going to braise it and put it in a stew, or maybe throw it in a potato hash.

No. 622985

>>622743
this has to be copypasta

No. 622988

>>622884
It’s not the end of the world, anon. Are you on meds for adhd? It’s possible to learn to cope with it better, you just need time and the right treatment. Might be a good idea to go to your gp about mental health stuff too if you haven’t already

I was in a similar position to you, dropped out of uni due to mental breakdown though. Felt shit at first but on reflection I realise how ill I was. When Covid stops fucking life up, I’m going back to do a healthcare degree - Student Finance allows another loan for those and some other science degrees as they’re considered valuable. Might be an option for you once you’re feeling better and if uni/career is really important to you. Thought I’d mention it as I didn’t know it was a thing until recently

I hope life gets better for you soon

No. 622989

>>622975
There's a lot of misinformation and scare mongering where I live around abortion. It was only made legal here two years ago but one of the arguments against it was
"women will use abortions instead of birth control, then they'll become infertile from all the abortions and the tax payer will have to fund their IVF then too"
I was having my own issues at the time and I'd walk past these prostesters every day. Old men wanting to talk to me about reproductive rights while I'm on my way to a fucking colposcopy clinic. Which they probably don't want the tax payer funding either.

No. 622990

>>622983
you need to cook cheap cuts for hours, anon, not like a regular roast. everything else you said makes it apparent that you don't know how to cook otherwise.

No. 622991

>>622990
Bitch.

No. 622992

>>622982
based, thought i was crazy reading all of the initial replies. get some standards you bitches, my god.

>>622743
listen to her, anon.

No. 622996

>>622743
I'd cut my losses if I were you.

No. 622999

>>622990
Or that she was rushed and flustered while making the other things so it came out bad overall? It happens, one bad meal doesn't mean someone can't cook overall.

>>622983
Hopefully someday you can look back on this disaster and laugh about it. Maybe when you succeed at making a roast next time! One time my sister made meatloaf and ended up dropping the entire thing in the sink when it was finished. It's alright.

No. 623000

>>622983
The longer it went on, the more of a disaster it sounded like, please start simple and learn how to cook before you attempt this jfc

No. 623002

>>622989
I figured but I didn't want to assume. "Abortion is dangerous" is a favorite talking point of the anti-choice, despite the fact that pregnancy and childbirth are much more damaging and likely to result in death. They hate hearing that women are way more likely to die in childbirth and are statistically safer with abortion.
I'm really sorry you have to put up with that level of ignorance.

No. 623004

it's fucking bs how being in this environment makes me what to do bad coping mechanisms, but I can't do them because of this environment and the lack of privacy. I used to just do them in a private public place, but I can't because of rona fs.

No. 623005

>>622743 get the fuck out whilst you can anon seriously

No. 623007

>>622990
Lmao dead ass, anon sounds like she needs to go back to canned spaghetti sauce

No. 623008

>>622743
Is this one of those relationships where you've been together for so long that you fear you'll lose that time-investment if you walk away? I mean your ultimatum was that you'd stay for another few years and then see? That's one pushover ultimatum.

When was the last time that you'd say you felt really content within the relationship?

No. 623011

>>622990
>>623000
This must be the same troll from upthread telling that poor anon to quit being upset about her scrote giving her a thoughtless necklace after 10 years of being together.

Fuck off.

No. 623013

I be fucking up ladies

No. 623014

>>623007
Sounds like all you eat every night is canned spaghetti. What's your brand anon?

No. 623022

>>623011
anon microwaved roasted veg. she is a shit cook.

No. 623024

>>623013
Same, sigh

No. 623025

>>623014
damn you are salty. too bad you didn't put some of that salt on your shitty roast, it would have been more tender.

No. 623026

>>623025
>>623022
>when people who don't cook try to troll

No. 623028

>>623026
let it go.

No. 623030

File: 1599238679558.gif (356.87 KB, 245x248, Shut up slut.gif)

>>623028(Infighting)

No. 623046

>>622983
Idk why people are angry at you and not your bf. You went to the trouble of making an elaborate meal and he just sat there watching you get stressed instead of helping? He pigged out on garlic bread and then compared you to his mother? The only detail missing is him banging his knife and fork on the table like a spoiled toddler. Girl, you're doing way too much for someone who isn't even giving you an ounce of respect back. He could have offered to make the gravy or keep an eye on the roast while you had a drink or something to relax. He could have also pretended to like it, like I do when my bf has a cooking disaster.

Like some anon said above, hopefully you can look back on this one day and laugh. That's the best attitude to have. It's one roast out of the many you will make, that one meal doesn't define your cooking skills. Everyone has off days. You'll always have another opportunity to impress people.

No. 623048

>>623046
who cares she's a shit cook and sperged out on people calling her out. the whole post reads like some copypasta anyway.

No. 623056

>>622944

Depends how far along you are and where you are. I was nine and a half weeks and the NHS hospital just went ahead with the pill + pessary method. Got it and all done and dusted but not going to lie, it was pretty traumatic. Discuss your options in full with your healthcare provider. If you're in the UK like me honestly I'd advise going private.

No. 623057

I see my dad once or maybe twice a year and whenever his visits approach it sinks in slowly that I don't even want to see him. He's spending money to travel here but.. I don't want to be in his company for these next few days. I'd be happier if he just never visited but I don't have the guts to be that blunt.

No. 623061

>>622928
I don't think you're being a bitch, but it may be too soon to say anything about it. Also, whatever may be off about this guy may just not bother others in the same way it bothers you. I'd try and really dig deep and come up with some possible reasons as to why his mannerisms bother you so much. Does he remind you of anyone from your past, for example?

No. 623064

Why are there so many femcels in this thread

No. 623072

>>623061
He doesn’t remind me of anyone to memory. Maybe subconsciously he does.

No. 623077

I feel a little bit teary eyed, only happens once a month now, always because my period is really close to starting.

But it reminded me of how much I cried before. In my last relationship I can't believe how much I used to cry. My ex thought I was using tears to be manipulative, he accused me of that a few times… screamed at me for fucking crying. No dude I was just miserable. I thought I had depression but it stopped the moment I moved.

I have soo many memories of us going places and me looking in the car mirror to check if my eyes were still puffy. That was my norm for 3 years.

No. 623085

>>623077
Same thing happens to me around my period. I cry over literally everything whereas normally it's actually an effort to cry kek. Also fuck your ex. Fuck men in general who act like women are manipulative for having any emotions at all.

No. 623087

>>622886
Same here, except I play Dota. Every now and then a girl will talk in a game and I immediately want to befriend her like a gigantic dumbass.

No. 623095

>>622777
God this is me. I can't stand being around people who whine about their lives yet have no motivation to better themselves. I've spent days looking up colleges and scholarships for people only for them to complain. Surround yourself with motivated people and they inspire you to succeed. Some people work in a grocery store and are taking every opportunity to better themselves and have a plan to get out. Nothing against them. Others work at a grocery store then spend all their money on anime conventions and talk shit about their parents whose home they live in rent-free. Embarrassing.

No. 623105

>>623095
To be fair, these people y'all are complaining about probably have no positive influences in their lives to motivate them to do better, either. I get the frustration, but let's not pretend that people who lack motivation are that way by choice.

No. 623125

>>623077
Anon are you me? I used to cry all the time over everything and I just thought I was a really weak person, but I left my ex and went off birth control and now I only cry about once a month. I used to break crying on the floor sobbing if my ex sent me a text cancelling plans at the last minute to hang out with friends, but now I can hear really bad news and not even cry, just think about how I can handle it.
I’m happy for you for getting to a happier place too!!!!!!

No. 623134

I don't like my bf's dad. He's married to a woman 20 years his junior, is a Trump supporter, racist, etc. What's worse is the step-mom is non-white, which makes me think he fetishizes non-white women in addition to being racist. Also he's just a rich, bougie asshole and one of those unemotional bootstrap-types. He treated my bf and his sister like shit growing up and was the source of a lot of their problems. My bf apparently isn't bothered by this anymore but I am. I hate going to visit them. I don't think they actually like either of us and just see us as charity cases. The step-mom is always trying to pawn expired food off on us like she's doing us some kind of favor. Like bitch we're not so poor that we want to eat your kid's expired goldfish crackers.

I guess I kind of wish I had my bf's level of tolerance but at the same time I think it's kind of pathetic that he puts up with them.

No. 623136

Some scrote who I had sex with months ago, texted me out the blue asked me do I have stds.

1. If I did have stds why would I tell you?
2.And if I've never been tested how would i know?

I told him to fuck off and go get tested if he had something and if would have actually taken the time to get to know me, he would know my sexual history. threatened to sue me if he has something kek

Unlike scrotes I actually go and get tested and dont just go around fucking everything raw and asking "are u clean?" And expecting the truth. This is why I dont so casual sex.

No. 623148

>>623136
So you got tested after him yeah?
Cause him accusing you of having given him something could either be seen as a warning (meaning he's been a carrier for awhile and genuinely believes he got it from you), or dangerously pathetic (meaning he doesn't keep track of his testing enough to know when he got it and is just going down the list of women he's slept with recently hoping one of you freaks out and owns up to it).

No. 623150

>>622992
>>622982
Dunno what to think anymore. We had another dispute where he weakly apologized for being such a flake and I flat out didn't accept it.
Looks like now he's chasing me because I look like I do want out. He outright lied to my face that he wanted it all along but it's oh so hard to get on one knee and show feelings.
Marriage is now off the table for me, for sure. I feel done and it's a blessing I had to travel back to my own country just now anyway.
What bothers me is that I still love him, he's still my best friend. We also have financial ties and pets. This really sucks and I still want to wail my disappointment and sadness. I need to get it out but also have to zip it.
Can't even tell my mom tomorrow and cry on her shoulder, I can't worry her before she goes to the hospital. That would be fucking cruel. Gonna have to look all cheery and hope she can't see though it.
The kicker : it's his rpg night so welp no time to even try to mend all of this before I'm gone. I can have some peace at least.

No. 623154

>>623136
I had a guy contact me soon after sex saying that he had hep C and to go get myself tested. I looked up hep C and it said it usually comes from injecting drugs and it has such incredibly low transmission rates through sex that even my anxious ass didn't flinch once I read the numbers. He said this after I'd already lost interest in him and stopped responding so to this day I think it was some weird revenge plan to get me stressed out and rushing to a clinic.

I tested for everything eventually and all good. Put me off casual sex knowing that the moment you move on (y'know no commitment so we're not fucking forever anyway) that they'll play mind games or pull weird stunts for attention.

No. 623155

>>623030
How come this got a redtext for infighting when anon(s) responded to OP's vent baiting and being a cunt in the first place?
Why is it okay for people to be assholes with impunity in this thread, but if the person being attacked claps back they get a ban for "infight." Moderation fucking sucks.

No. 623157

>>623150
Anon that sounds depressing, he knows you're upset yet he can't put off his fucking rpg night to try and mend things with you even though you're leaving tomorrow for a month, that's a huge red flag if you ask me. As the other anons said, he's gotten used to you being low maintenance.
Sounds like you feel codependent on this relationship because it's all you've known for the past 10 years and you're afraid to call it off even though you seem to be miserable

No. 623159

>>623157
Yeah, sunken costs, fear of being alone, having to start again…
I feel like a toddler shooting that it's not fair. I worked so hard, tried to be a good low maintenance gf and this is all I get for it?
I guess I'm just an idiot.

No. 623164

>>623150
>>623159
Sorry you're going through that anon. At least now you know for sure the degree of 'selfish' this guy is being when he can't even call off game night to focus on your relationship when you're clearly upset. I'm glad it's the push you needed instead of waiting another few years hoping he'll change.

No. 623169

My boyfriend is an extremely selfish person. Every time I have to ask him to do something for me, he accuses me of being useless, dumb or similar. He always claims that I only want to take advantage of him when actually I have to choose the best moment to ask him for things or I even have to give him something in return or he just won’t do it (I.e. if I have to buy something specific of one shop, I have to tell him that we’ll get lunch later or he won’t feel motivated). He’s lazy, so lazy for things that he doesn’t want to do or get involved with.
When it comes to things that he does want though, he’s the fastest he has ever been to do it. And it hurts me. Because when he wants to see his friends, he will always wake up early, go to their friends’s and of course will spend the whole day there if they ask so, not even complaining or deciding not to go.
Right now he screamed at me in front of his father, calling me useless and his father of course defended me because he knows how his son is a lazy piece of shit (he’s also tired of having to ask him to do things for him), and then he got mad at us and throw a fit.
Sometimes I wonder why do I keep trying, my fear of being alone is more strong than anything, I’m afraid I won’t ever find anyone that will love me but then I start to think that maybe out there is someone for me who won’t scream every time he gets pissed, someone who doesn’t call me useless day after day, someone who will be proud of having me as a partner and not ashamed.
Idk I just can’t stop crying and asking myself of did I end up like this, being this miserable joke who accepted and assumed this abuse as love.

No. 623174

>>623169
This guy is straight up abusing you. Nobody deserves this type of treatment and I hope you can find it within yourself to leave him.

No. 623176

>>623169
You're already alone anon, all you have is the title of saying that you have a boyfriend and he's a piece of shit.
You might as well be single, if not to make your life easier, but so your chances of meeting someone who may treat you in the way you deserve won't be at 0 like it is now.

No. 623177

>>623169
Being alone is way better than being abused, speaking from experience there.

The break up is always hard, initially you might find it incredibly hard to let go but wait til all that weight gets lifted off you. Day after day of nobody calling you useless. You'll start to believe in yourself again.

No. 623180

>>623169
Oh anon, please, please leave this man. Whatever good things there are about him, which there doesn't sound like any, they do NOT outweigh this horrendous behavior and how it makes you feel. Like >>623176 said, "you're already alone," in this relationship, and it IS so much better to actually be alone than with someone who makes you feel lonely, and worse, abuses you. Rooting for you. Scrotes die.

No. 623192

He just said to me “you’re retarded, see, from now on I will address you as retarded and every time you speak to me I will tell you that you are retarded so you don’t forget how retarded you are and you will have it clear.” I don’t think it can get any worse than this.

No. 623193

>>623192
What's your living situation anon, are you renting together? Do you have things like that complicating you just walking? Because that kind of hatred will escalate to into something worse soon

No. 623194

>>623192
>“you have a small dick, see, from now on I will address you as short cock and every time you speak to me I will tell you that you are a short cock so you don’t forget how small you are and you will have it clear.”

No. 623199


No. 623200

>>623193
I don't have anyone else, I wish I could say I have family or friends to run to but I don’t. Not even a home. Nothing else. Nothing else.
He tore me apart and now I can hear him laughing while watching YouTube videos, while I’m having an anxiety attack and I can’t even tell anything else (or breathe loudly) because he’ll start screaming again.

No. 623201

I'm feeling very frustrated and just so done with everything anons. My life keeps spiraling more and more out of my control and it's so exasperating because I have a faint idea of how to make things at least a bit better, but it's like I have a fucking lock that won't let me move forward. From my childhood, to my teenage, to my adult years I've been looking forward to that one moment I would finally find a bit of "emotional relief", but at this point I have so much baggage I can't see a future where I'm actually happy. Nothing, not a single thing I dreamed of became a reality. I don't know, I wasn't dealt a good hand at life and I was always aware of it, but I always thought I would sooner or later be able to figure shit out before it was too late, and now it is late and everything is exactly the same as it was 15 years ago. The worst part is I've been toying with the idea of just ending it all but I'm not even brave enough to do it, so instead I keep wallowing in self pity hoping that maybe if I wait a bit longer shit will get better. Dunno, just wanted to vent a bit, I will probably feel less shitty tomorrow but today is one of those days.

No. 623207

>>623200
I went to a shelter two years ago, no family to fall back on. Had
a few stressful weeks after that trying to sort out housing but these things only escalate if you stay.

No. 623208

>>623200
Pleazs seek women’s resources near you.

No. 623216

>>623194
>short cock
I'm in tears anon

No. 623218

>>623201
Hey anon, you're allowed to feel the way you're feeling right now, but you don't deserve to feel so downtrodden and fed up with life. Please don't give up. Take it from an old bitch like me who thought everything was awful and spent days fantasising about killing myself. It took time for life to give me a break from all of the bullshit, but it eventually eased up and I had a moment of clarity and knew what to do when the opportunity came into my grasp. Life can change so quickly, for better or worse, but I believe you will be given your respite soon, anon. Don't let your negative feelings go entirely - use them to propel yourself through life. Get angry and fuel your passions. What do you enjoy doing? I find I am most creative and alive when I am feeling the way you do, but I make it into a positive and it restores the balance I need. I'm sorry if I am rambling on, but I do truly believe that the world wants you to stick around and keep kicking ass. And you're right, today might be diabolically shite, but tomorrow might be your day of change, too. You got this, anon. We're all here for you.

No. 623221

I keep feeling like I'm having trouble breathing and it's making me panic, can't go to the doc cos I have no insurance. genuinely can't tell if it's all in my head or not. I just want to feel normal

No. 623224

>>623192
I didn't read your full post but fuck that guy. You're not at fault here and you shouldn't be shedding tears over this fuckhead. If you can, leave him. Seek out women's shelters if you have nowhere to go. Steal some of his cash if you gotta. He doesn't deserve you, honey.

No. 623244

>>622863
fill up pots and bottles and try to stock up before they turn it off. Hope it's completed soon

No. 623252

>>623200
Agree with the other anons about the women’s shelter. Just get out as soon as possible. Your abuser can and will turn physically violent. Your life is at stake here so please please get out asap.

No. 623256

>>623252
Same OP but of course you have no money, no family, and no assets of your own. Abusers froth at the mouth for women like this. If you do have any semblance of independence then they’ll take it away from you. The point is to isolate and own you so that you can’t leave.
Well the truth is that you can leave. And you definitely should for your own safety OP. Please keep in mind that around 33% of murdered women are killed by their romantic partners.

No. 623259

Not sure if any anons have read 1Q84 but damn do I wish the Willow House (the organization for killing abusive men and housing DV victims) was real rn.

No. 623265

My boyfriend randomly offered to buy me food since he was going to run errands. I said yes and thanked him and then he started going on about how expensive that place is and he only offered because I looked sad and he wanted to help??? Was I supposed to say no because it's too expensive?? You fucking offered? He used to be such a kind man but it's like he has no patience for me anymore.

No. 623268

>>623265
That's a #niceguy if I've seen one

No. 623272

Told my mom kinda offhanded that no one gets cured of depression, you may get better but you will never truly 1000% get rid of it and it's better to just accept that and still strive to be better. Kinda like no one is an ex alcoholic, you can be an alcoholic who hasn't drunk anything since who knows. She looked at me with such, I don't even know, like she realised I may not be as sunny and okay as I come off as. Can't really describe it but it was a weird deep vibe mann.

No. 623286

I loved my ex so much. Now I cannot connect with anyone else. My love for him died as well and I'm left as an empty shell. I just really miss getting butterflies in my stomach.

No. 623297

>>623259
I always think about how Aomame would be doing god’s work irl

No. 623339

Sorry for the wall of text, but I need to get this off my chest anons.

I hate feeling like I never had a chance to even feel genuinely happy and "normal." Because ever since I was kid, I always felt extremely depressed and daydreamed about killing myself for most of the day. What sucks even more is that nobody around me gave enough of a shit to fucking help me get better. Like, I think people can agree that it's not normal to have a 6-year-old self-harm by hitting herself in the head and talk about wanting to never wake up, yet my family didn't think twice about that! They never tried to get me help, instead they would just emotionally/physically abuse and neglect me until I did something drastic enough to have the school call them after they baker acted me. They'd temporally care about me before, so their reputation wouldn't get ruined before going back to ignoring me and treating me like I was expendable. They couldn’t even tell my grandpa (the one who loves me the most in this shitty world) that I was in the hospital for a week in a comatose state because of a failed suicide attempt out of fear that he would look at them negatively! And because I was so used to be taken advantage of by the people who were supposed to care about me the most in life, I let others, men and women, use me as well! All because I have this innate drive to please others and want to be considered “good” by them, because I wanted my existence to be validated by them. And because of that, I've been so traumatized by men taking sexually advantage of me, that I’m only comfortable enough to date women even though I’m bisexual lol.

Nowadays, at the age of 23 I'm so depressed and numb that I don't even have the energy to call or text people anymore. All I can do is force myself into a routine where I do nothing but go to school and work full-time. Nothing in my life brings me joy anymore and I can't focus on shit without being distracted with thoughts of wanting to off myself, unless I abuse the fuck out of my adhd meds so I can focus on doing things I used to love, like playing video games for a couple of hours. What's even more sad is that I only imagine myself living to the age of 25 which fucking terrifies me but also excites me because I only have to keep up this charade, I built up for a lil while longer.

Honestly though, a huge part of me is so goddamn tired of feeling this way and wants to seek desperate help. That part tells me that things will get better in the future, that I just have to stick around long enough to see it. But the other part of me just accepts that this is how I'm supposed to feel for the rest of my life and hopes that I'll have better luck in the next life.

No. 623346

File: 1599271171605.png (371.57 KB, 540x540, tumblr_eb77fcf2832b739a738ddb0…)

>started talking to cute guy earlier in the spring
>first few months he's super sweet and complimentary, engaged in conversation and regularly makes effort to text in the morning, periodically throughout the day and say goodnight, acts really interested in getting to know me and convos never feel forced
>6 years older so seems more mature (in hindsight this should've been the first red flag tbh gals, i'm in my early 20s)
>things start to get a little spicier, start giving him nudes/sext, he's really happy about this and most convos soon always come back to sending nudes/sexting
>time progresses, original sweetness and majority of effort wears off, endearing nicknames replaced with 'bimbo' 'slut' 'his bitch' etc etc., compliments now rare and replaced with degrading 'teasing'
>barely texts first now, takes days to respond unless double/triple text, doesn't seem interested in getting to know me anymore and mainly only responds to dirty talk

This dude's got so many nudes of me and I'm so mad at myself for not seeing that he's just using me for fap material sooner. He seemed so genuine and sweet in the beginning and I wish I could erase his memory because I don't want him to know me like that anymore. Wish COVID would end so I could fight him on sight but he'd probably like that too

No. 623351

File: 1599272075975.jpeg (47.63 KB, 480x434, 20760B5C-AE40-4765-89B5-9094D9…)

>>623346
Stop.
Sending.
Scrotes.
Nudes.

Unless you have something from him of equal of greater revenge power fucking stop.

Ghost him assess your losses and know you deserve better because you do

Don’t let anyone speak to you like that because you should already fucking know you don’t need his reassurance/attention to feel happy

No. 623355

>>623339
I don't have advice to offer. I just wanted to say that much of this resonates with me and I'm very sorry you're having to experience this. I thought that maybe just knowing someone read it and that you aren't alone in feeling that way could help. I'm wishing the best for you.

No. 623356

>>623346
I swear you posted this exact same response with the same reaction pic in another thread.
Also, you're really pathetic for sending a dude nudes for no reason. Love yourself

No. 623357

>>623346
anon please don't respond to him when he pops back up. I know it's super hard but come here and vent if you need it.

No. 623359

Starting to believe that I have failed as a sister. My brother is hardcore schizophrenic, and he's been calling me non stop as of late, idk what for. He has caused me so many years of all types of abuse and I suffer from PTSD, but I feel horrible for not picking up. Kinda wish he'd just text me, but I feel like he's just gonna call me to yell at me. Might throw my phone down the toilet, I'm so fucking paranoid.

I got a call from a private number, and I'm not sure if it's him but I refused to answer.

No. 623364

>>623359
You're not the problem here. Love yourself anon. If you want to meet him in the middle, do so by texting him that you care but that you need distance. And that anything he has to say can be said through text. If it gets unhealthy or aggressive, say you'll cut ties with him. Say he needs to get help from a professional in order for the two of you to have a relationship.

No. 623366

File: 1599273502481.jpg (36.93 KB, 622x394, tumblr_dcece80b59f8763f1544440…)

I've barely gone on here the past month and coming back I'm realizing just how bad this site is for my mental health. I like a lot of the unfiltered opinions and actually being able to speak my mind without having my gender used against me but fuck some of you are so miserable and joyless it bleeds into everything else.

No. 623367

>>623355

I know it shouldn’t do much, but reading your reply honestly helps tremendously and it really means a lot to me to know that I’m not alone in this world when it comes to these feelings.

Anyways thank you for reading and taking the time to reply to me, I hope good things come your way, kind anon!

No. 623370

>>623359

You shouldn’t feel like you failed as a sister when you’re trying your best to help your brother despite having PTSD from the abuse he’s done to you throughout the years. And I know you feel guilty for not being able to help him, but it’s honestly difficult to help people who are hardcore schizophrenics. Plus there’s only so much you can do to help him without having to jeopardize yourself and your mental health.

And these might be dumb questions but is he currently seeing a doctor or taking meds? And are you the only family he has or does he have others he can rely on?

No. 623373

>>623366
You know what? That's a valid way to feel. Some people find sites like this cathartic, but for some people they find it bad for them like you do. I hope you can stay away for good one of these days. I think there are some sites that block you from other sites (usually social media focused) that you might consider using?

No. 623380

File: 1599274948665.png (227.73 KB, 880x756, 85-852239_emoji-emojis-emotico…)

Really sad right now because I found out the manlet I was crushing on at work quit (or maybe he got fired Idk, all I know is he's not on the schedule anymore)
I'm also sad because he never asked for my number. I'm never gonna see him again

No. 623382

>>623366
If you think this place is bad lemme tell you about the waste of time lurking r9k was. Idk why I did it.

No. 623384

>>623382
Nta but I did that for like 2 days to find out what the hell was the deal with that board and I couldn’t take it. They would post so much shota/mommy shit lmao
They really are just a bunch of psychos with mommy issues.

No. 623402

My 14-y/o cat is real sick. Just happened today, out of the blue. Thankfully I actually already had a vet appointment scheduled for a different minor issue she was having. She’s feverish and dehydrated and they aren’t sure why. Loaded her up with fluids and antibiotics and sent her home to see if things are better by tomorrow.

She’s laying at the foot of my bed breathing fast and feverish. Won’t eat, won’t drink, won’t use the litterbox. I’m really afraid I’m gonna wake up tomorrow and she’s gonna be gone.

No. 623403

>>623380
I'm sorry anon, that sucks. You should have just stuffed him in your purse when you had the chance

No. 623407

>>623402
this happened to my cat. she ended up having hyperthyroidism but had some infection but ended up fine. hope your cat gets better, she probably will!

No. 623413

>>623403
I know right
I found his Facebook, but I feel like contacting him there would come off as weird/stalkerish

No. 623414

>>623413
do it anyway what's the worst that could happen?

No. 623418

I just got 14/20 in a fucking online quiz. I have my fucking notes with me and I still fucked it up. I'm done with Physiology. Fuck the cells, and fuck homeostasis.

No. 623433

>>623418
If it makes you feel better anon, I recently got a like a 4/19 or something. I didn't even properly look at the score cause I already knew what was up.

No. 623441

I feel like therapy would be useless for me. I've been told countless times to seek therapy but I feel like it would be an expensive waste of time. More or less. What can the psych even do? Tell me the abuse wasn't my fault? I know that already. Tell me I was too young to consent? I know. Tell me about my daddy issues and how they affect what type of men I feel attracted to? Bitch I know all that. What're they gonna do? Tell me to practice mindfullness? Accept my feelings and analyze them? It's all such a waste. The only thing I would benefit getting help for would be the constant dull sadness I've been feeling for the past 3 or so years. Also I just distrust people in the mental health department in general. A psych who told me that she barely cared for any of her patients and wanted them out of her office the moment their time was up. Like, imagine I'm pouring my heart out and my deepest feelings to some therapist and all they are thinking is 'can't wait for this bitch to finish so i can check twitter' or something.

No. 623461

Is it normal to keep thinking you see your ex in public? I swear almost every time I'm out and I look around I see someone who looks very similar to my ex girlfriend and for a few crazy seconds it's actually her and I make up this elaborate fantasy of going to her and striking up a conversation. It's been 3 years since our breakup and this still happens ffs lol. I saw a girl on the bus yesterday who I swear looked incredibly similar to her, and when she talked on the phone it even sounded like her, and I keep thinking now it was really her this time. These mind games of mine are exhausting

No. 623477

I want to kill myself anons it's getting fucking ridiculous. I dreamt such a long elaborate dream about fucking my sister. It was so fucking gross anons i woke up and drank some milk and puked it because the dream is still in my head. This is not even a first time thing, i've dreamt about gross stuff with her a few times and my mom too. And my fucking dad too; who i have only met once. I wanna cry again i feel so bad i just want it to stop. Please. I hate this. I'm almost lucid in some of those dreams where i'm aware i'm dreaming. How can i make this stop anons i'm tired

No. 623481

>>623461
Is your fantasy to get back with her? Took me a long time to give up on that possibility with my ex.

No. 623482

>>623461
You seem to be really hung up on this ex of yours. You're not over her at all. I've had this happen to me after a bad breakup, but it only lasted for a year.

No. 623483

I'm refusing to ever see my extended family again and I feel great about it. Considering even removing the few I have on social media or just blocking them from seeing my posts because fuck them. They never cared about anything I achieved. I went through tech school, have a great paying job, but nobody ever cared despite that being more than anyone else has done. But they think my idiot female cousin is the best because she works at a factory, can operate a machine and dates a supervisor. Not to mention she's an absolute asshole to everyone and treated me like shit when I was working with her years ago but in there eyes thats a "strong independent women". No matter what my siblings and I or our other cousins do, grandma is still giving everything to the one set of cousins. They're huge liars, thieves, talk grandma into signing car loans or getting new things she doesn't need so they can use, and they fucking gloat about how great their life is all the time.

I always knew something was off but didn't fully acknowledge it until my dad told me about what how she's always done this since we were kids. I'm not wasting my time and money on gifts to impress her if it's never going to change. Fuck them all.

No. 623489

>>623339
Do an internet search for anhedonia. It can be a symptom of other conditions such as dysthymia. I dealt with it by forcing myself to exercise because exercise releases dompamine in the brain and by supplementing my diet with increased amino acids, particularly tryptophan and tyrosine. This didn't suddenly cure me but it gave me enough relief to do what was necessary to change my situation.

No. 623513

>>623402

She’s still here! Her fever broke I think and I got her to drink a little water this morning, and she’s willing to purr again. Not 100% but improving. I’m so relieved. I think I spent more time laying in bed awake than actually sleeping through haha.

No. 623519

>>623513
That's great anon! Sick pets are the worst, it's so stressful to see them suffer and them being unable to communicate what's wrong. My cat has been pretty sick for the last couple weeks and had to stay at the vet for a couple nights too, can't say I have slept much either. We still aren't sure what's wrong with him (and we've spend over $2000 so far trying to find out) but he is slowly improving thankfully. Glad to hear your kitty is seems to be on the mend too.

No. 623528

I have lost all my friends since I started to get depressed. One by one they left when they realized they could no longer use me as a trash can for their problems. I just wanted a friend to have silly conversations and laugh from time to time.

No. 623540

>>623402
My cat had the exact same symptoms and when I took her to the vet she had diagnosed pancreatitis.
It's important that she eats because it can lead to liver failure which is not only deadly but extremely painful.
I know I'm scaring you but mention that to your vets.
In order to determine that they need to do a blood lab test which is kind of costly.

No. 623586

Anons in therapy, is there any circumstance in which it would be acceptable for your therapist to go apeshit on you? By that I mean get so angry that they raise their voice, curse at you, and try to start a fight by taunting you? I just experienced this with my therapist and I still can't believe that I had to be the one to calm him down. I've been having issues with him for a while now and I think this might be the last straw. I've always thought he was defensive and had a fragile ego and this kind of just confirmed it for me. All I did was ask if there were any other therapy models we could try since the ones we had tried thus far haven't been right for me and he blew it out of proportion saying I called him worthless and I was just projecting my failures as a person onto him.

No. 623594

>>623586
Never, this shouldn't even be a question. Change therapists and try to get some of your money back over these lost sessions.

No. 623596

>>623586
what the hell? that "therapist" has major issues himself. find a different therapist and never look back. no one should treat you like this, period.

No. 623597

Just watched "I'm Thinking of Ending Things" on Netflix. I don't know why I thought watching a Kaufman movie would make for a relaxing evening but that's on me. Now I'm just going to bed confused and depressed lmao.

No. 623600

>>623586
Drop this dude. If he's part of a bigger organization or company send an email to his employer to complain.

No. 623604

>>623586
Anon I've never heard of something like that happening, what the fuck. You should change therapists immediately and do what >>623600 said, that's disgusting and he could get his license revoked revoked for it.

No. 623605

I hate that no one at my job even responds to requests to cover shifts. When I can’t, I say so, or if I can, I always do, but these people literally can never be assed to respond. Also absolutely annoying that our owner keeps us unbelievably short staffed but whatever.

No. 623607

>>623600
And report him to the board/make a claim against his licensure if he’s licensed

No. 623632

>>623594
>>623596
>>623600
>>623604
>>623607
Thank you so much for all the responses on my post, I really appreciate it. I don't have a big support network so I didn't have a lot of places I could talk about this.
To >>623594 I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply anyone should have to go through that. It's just that even after I calmed him down, he said that his anger towards me was completely justified so for a moment I was wondering if there was any situation in which this could possibly be justified.
Also >>623604 unfortunately I'm no stranger to seeing this kind of behavior in therapists. It's unacceptable but it still happens because at the end of the day therapists are still people and they can be just as stupid and cruel as the average person, even though they're not supposed to be.
He runs an independent practice but I found him through the Psychology Today website. Should I send them a message about it, or would that be stupid? I don't expect them to take him off at all, but if (God forbid) more people come and complain about him over time it could build a trail of sorts. I'm not sure which licensing board I should be going to about this either, should I just go based off our location? Sorry if these are stupid questions, of course I will be looking into it myself as well.

I found a therapist who seems like she might be a better fit for me. I hope she will be able to take my insurance but if not I think I'll take a break from therapy and just try to help myself, as unrealistic as that sounds.
Thank you very much again to everyone who responded. I would be glad to come back and give updates after I leave him.
And if anyone is reading this who's in a similar situation, please don't be like me. I've been seeing this guy for two years now, and I tried so hard to make it work the whole time. But you shouldn't have to do that. I kept wondering what was wrong about me that I wasn't receiving the kind of care other people were talking about with their therapists. But you will come to realize that a therapist's ineptitude doesn't necessarily have anything to do with you.

No. 623647

Holy shit the rainforest really is gonna burn away and the Brazilian president really couldn’t give a single fuck aaargh

No. 623661

>>623632
are you american, anon? the procedure for reporting therapists depends a little bit on which country you are in (more the continent, really. it's fairly similar for both america and canada, different elsewhere) you should report him to his licensing board, and you can also report him to the ethics committee of his professional association if you want to go through multiple channels. they will take this seriously and it could help prevent someone in a more vulnerable position get badly hurt, maybe even traumatized if he escalates his outbursts or takes them out on a suicidal or already freshly traumatized patient.
not that it was acceptable or "less wrong" to do this to you, of course, just emphasizing how horrible his behaviour could become, left unchecked, in case you're apprehensive or having doubts about reporting him. so sorry this happened to you, anon. i hope this pattern of therapists being inappropriate with you ends here. you didn't deserve this and it was not justified. seems like a precursor to him escalating things later, in my opinion

No. 623670

>>623632
Anon I'm >>623594 and that's not what I meant, sorry for my poor wording! I just meant that; of course it's not acceptable in any circumstance and I was surprised you even had to ask because it's so obviously never okay. I hope I make more sense this time.

Good luck!!

No. 623683

all throughout lockdown I spent a lot of time thinking about this one friend of mine, and I'm just so angry at myself for putting up with his shit. Losing his shit at me over 1 second hiccups that NO sane person would even mention, Shit talking my interests to me, constantly treating me and other friends like we're retarded, generally being an insufferable fuck. I've realized the only thing I can stand about him is that we have some similar interests (video games) but even then he's obnoxious. He's a sore winner, finds a way to make any game unfun, constantly gives unwanted advice (literally he came up behind me at an arcade once and said "I'm pretty sure ______ is the beat" because I missed like 2 notes.) He's fucking stupid but is such a pain in the ass no one ever wants to argue with him so he just constantly thinks he's right. I put up with this prick insulting me for years because I was so spineless? Desperate for a friend? I don't know what I'm worth but it's more than this christ

No. 623702

I destroyed a friendship with my actions and oh boy am I in shambles about it. Holy shit it's like I was sleepwalking, woke up and finally realized the scope of what I've done. What the fuck. I need therapy yesterday. This is the worst thing that has happened to me.

No. 623716

>>623702
Hey anon, don’t know the details of your mistake but I’ve been there. Destroyed my relationship with my best friend and ended up going to therapy. DO go, because learning why you did what you did will let you grow as a person and not make the mistakes again. Things will get better and you’ll make new friends and you’ll be better to them because of what happened x

No. 623735

>>623716
Thank you so much for your words, anon. You have no idea how much that means to me. Knowing I'm not alone makes all this pain a little easier to bear. It's teaching me such a valuable lesson. Thank you thank you thank you.

No. 623750

File: 1599339352528.jpg (Spoiler Image, 40.13 KB, 402x514, 20200905_165407.jpg)

Someone in the trading card community i'm a part of got sent a photo of a dead/taxidermy mouse in a DM and she's really upset about it. The person on IG who did it is apparentrly 13 years old and is being called out on it by multiple people, but there's seriously one bitch replying to me and telling me not to be mean to this person because they didnt know any better. I honestly hate the super young generation of forgiving someone's actions because their age. 13 is def old enough to know not to send a dead mouse photo to a trading card community. it had nothing to even do with the purchase. I called her mentally unstable and the person told me that was 'wrong to say.' What the fuck is WRONG with these bitches

No. 623761

>>623750
>she's really upset about it
Why? That image is so mild that it's a waste of spoiler.

No. 623767

File: 1599340570137.jpg (28.59 KB, 690x720, FB_IMG_1597174091543.jpg)

MOM WTF STOP LEAVING HOME YOU CAN BARELY WALK 3 STEPS WITH A MASK WITHOUT FEELING THE NEED TO SLIDE IT DOWN

WHYYYYYYYYYY

WHENEVER SHE DOES THIS MY ANXIETY SPIKES SO MUCH I WON'T SLEEP EASILY AGAIN FOR DAYS

No. 623768

>>623761
I spoiled it just in case someone was sensitive to weird taxidermy images. Not all of us read the Plastic and Proud threads. Anyway, the point is that mouse was a completely unrelated reply for a trade. You either trade another card or just send money.

No. 623769

>>623767
I have a boss who is always talking with his mask on his chin. i wish i could honestly punch him in his ugly face.

No. 623778

>>623750
>tame ass picture of a dead mouse
>13 years old
>being called out on it
>trading card community
yeah gotta be real with you here anon but you're all severely autistic in this situation. do something else with your time

No. 623780

>>623750
you're overreacting and taking a dumb troll way too seriously

No. 623793

>>623767

I hate penis-noses, they look so dumb.

No. 623826

>>623769
just cough around him

No. 623829

>>623750
>>623768
Go back to your safe zone autist before I show you something to be triggered about

No. 623832

I fucking hate when I talk about a movie to someone and I say "I don't want to spoil anything" and the dumb cunt looks it up. In fact I hate when anyone looks up any fucking movie. just enjoy the film, retard. you don't need to read the entire plot to understand what the movie is.
If we have plans to watch a film and you tell me "Oh I googled it" the movie plans are cancelled

No. 623834

>>623829
More of this energy on lolcow please

No. 623836

>>623834
It's actually very cringe and not energy lolcow needs

No. 623838

>>623836
Do you need me to tell you to go back to your safe zone or what

No. 623839

>>623838
Don't look to me for advice on whether or not to embarrass yourself, anon.

No. 623840

>>623832

If there’s a movie that I know I’ll see in the future I avoid the trailer and any other details. Makes it much more enjoyable. In an ideal world I know nothing about a given movie except that someone I know thinks I’ll like it.

No. 623841

>>623839
What. I just think farmers are sensitive

No. 623844

My bf lives with his mom and she had a heart surgery this week and two days later he was going out maskless to play magic with his friends. Wtf is wrong with him

No. 623845

>>623836
What's cringe is shaking and crying over a pic of taxidermy rat then bullying a 13 year old child

No. 623847

>>623832
I don't even want people to watch trailers! Just, trust me you stupid bitch.

No. 623851

>>623832
you need to chill. people are allowed to enjoy and experience movies in a different way than you

No. 623853

>>623851
NO YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG

No. 623857

File: 1599349094025.jpg (78.58 KB, 1100x619, only judy can judge me.jpg)

I was in a situationship with my prof for way too long and now that he has moved on to at least one other former student of his, he refuses to return something that I let him borrow. I've been asking him for months now to mail it to me since we live in different cities but he clearly has no intention of doing so. I'm literally going to take his ass to small claims court and drag the fuck out of him with the full force of the law.

No. 623865

man when the thrill of shitposting for stress relief wears off im gonna have to start doing heroin or some shit

No. 623872

>>623865
Unironically would try heroin once, all the hype better be true

No. 623875

File: 1599350110209.jpg (70.95 KB, 512x488, unnamed.jpg)

I said I wasn't gonna browse LC anymore, but here my dumb, clown looking ass is again

No. 623878

>>623872
Same except I want to try coke

No. 623879

>>623878
Cokes overrated, you’re just going to destroy your sinuses and have to shit

No. 623881

>>623878
Most overrated and underwhelming

No. 623884

I think the (blog) ban is stupid. There are some autists that provided genuinely good, highly detailed posts with info and just to get banned for (blog) is such a shame. You shouldn't need to sage if you're providing useful shit to the thread

No. 623894

>>623884
>blog
>useful info
Not possible.

No. 623957

/ot/ is as slow as /g/ these days urgh

No. 623960

>>623884
or just learn how to phrase it that it doesnt sound like one.

No. 623963

i wanna be a doctor so fucking bad but i'm scared that i won't get into medical school hmhmhhnh

No. 623970

>>623750
holy shit this is the most childish thing I've read, should of just blocked the lil retard, I hate 13 year olds they always think dumb shit like this is so "kewl and edgyy hurr durrr im such a trollzzz" honestly lol never engage with dumb ass kids because then you will be seen as a the bad guy and people will say shit like "youre the adult you should know better" "youre older than them set the example"

No. 623971

>>623957
so true omg just a few days ago or a week ago i feel like it was way more busy! what happened?! i hope theres more movement soon

No. 623973

Ughhh I hate scrotes my age (early 20s) they’re so fucking rude. I work retail and some scrote came to my cash and he was rude af. I’m probably nitpicking but this dude was so brusque like try to answer my questions so I can make this transaction easier for the both of us?? You can get out faster if you answer my questions properly. Like ffs would it hurt you to be nicer? It’s literally my job to be nice fucking get over yourself. He even had the audacity to act like I was dumb when I’m just following the company script.

No. 623976

>>623875
I can't even count the number of times I told myself I wasn't coming back here this year alone

No. 623997

I'm incredibly frustrated with gay men invading women's only spaces. I was in a female gaming group and a gay guy came and said

"I know this is all women's but I don't have anyone to play with! Hey yaaalllll!!"

Fuck off. It's women's only for a reason not "feminine people". You could easily play with men and not once have your skills doubted or patronized because of your gender, just keep your dick sucking cravings to yourself.

No. 624003

I've been self conscious of my stomach pooch ever since I was 12 and an older girl pointed it out. The insecurity that one comment caused is INSANE. I fucking hate being skinny-fat. Once I earn an iota of self-esteem I feel my stomach and I just lose it all.

No. 624006

boyfriend said it sounded like i was developing sleep apnea and should maybe think about losing a little bit of weight. i know he's not wrong, i had bad snoring issues when i was a higher weight but lord if i am not embarrassed to all hell. i never want to eat again.

No. 624007

>>623872
Bruh just take a nap it’s the same shit lmao

No. 624026

So I saw a post on instagram that reported that a pedophile sex ring was busted and more than 30 children were recovered, horrifying. And some bitch in the comments was like 'i dont care ACAB ACAB ACAB ACAB'. I hope for her sake she is just a dumb teen who'll realize nothing is black and white but god, I was so angered.

No. 624033

>>623064
There are a lot of them on the whole board.

No. 624034

Has anyone ever been arrested? Was it traumatic? I have "technically" been arrested but wasn't put in the system or anything. It was a very small town town and the cops and CPS came to my house because we were going to be taken away. I was 15 at this time and instead of being cooperative I sat in front of my bedroom door and had my legs straight with the bottoms of my feet pressing against the wall in front of me (I was wedged in perfectly.) They were not able to open it manually no matter how hard they tried and eventually broke through the part of the door above me and pulled me through. I was put in handcuffs and screamed at. When I got to the station they put me in one of 3 cells and took my glasses and my bra (forcefully.) I had to sit there feeling so fucking exposed and helpless for hours until a social worker came to pick me up. This experience has been popping into my head lately and fucking me up. I've never been considered a "bad" kid, not that they deserve it either but I really was just a greasy weeb who didn't want to acknowledge how bad her life due to shitty parents which is why I stayed in my bedroom. I fucking wish this was in the time of cellphones and social media because I know there were so many better ways to handle that.

No. 624044

I hate how the housing market is so fucked up and wages are so low even when you have a master's degree and you're working full time. It's where I live but I've seen many other Europeans and north Americans with the exact same problem so I don't need to say where I am now. But when my parents told me how much rent costed them in mid-2000s for our previous three bedroom apartment and yet still bitch about my siblings and me still living with them. When I left they were pissed and wanted me to come back asap and they were almost happy I nearly died of covid abroad and had to come back home because I couldn't work anymore but now they're bitching again because I have a hard time finding a job in our country, which is why I left in the first place. Nearly all the people I was studying with in university were living by themselves or started living by themselves after graduating but their parents helped them a lot financially until they found a job (which they helped with too) but my parents didn't believe me until I had to show them some reliable statistics.

With what they used to pay (before it literally tripled and we had to leave) I wouldn't even be able to find a one-room apartment and still be able to pay my bills. When I say one-room I'm talking about these small places where your room and the living room are the same place, not sure what the word is anymore. I feel like I'll be stuck forever with my family and never have a private life.

No. 624049

>>623750
yOU forgot the trigger warning omg anon I almost had a panic attack time to cope be age reggressing and suicidebaiting on instagram, while posting pink political demographics on my story. Everyone is valid and has their coping mechanisms!!! This person is so ploblematic,,, they should totally be cancelled and deplatformed, they need ro be held accountable. I understand theyre. But this image is kind of ableist and classist, they/them should learn anyways ACAB(back to twitter with you)

No. 624051

>>624044
Same where I am, anon. The older generation bitches about how we would be able to afford houses if we stopped buying takeout coffee, ignoring the fact we’d have to stop that for like 120 years before we’d save enough for a property lol

I think the market has to crash at some point though. Like rent and other expenses can’t get much higher in some places, most people won’t be able to afford it at all and those with the option to will go back to living with family and landlords will get fucked if they don’t lower their prices

That’s what I’m hoping for anyway

No. 624055

>>623832
i do this and i don't understand how it takes my enjoyment from the movie.

spoiler autists are insufferable retards.

No. 624056

File: 1599389335680.png (102.18 KB, 252x260, tumblr_inline_mht6mpdYbU1qz4rg…)

I'm so so stressed, and sad and lonely. This pandemic, this entire year has been a complete shitshow and I'm so close to kermiting because god it's so overwhelming.
I have no job other than the odds and ends I'm able to do online and I have to get my life together in the next months because I have to find someplace new to live and mentally I can't process it because it means a new chapter of my life and leaving a lot of things I'm not ready to leave/cope with. I don't know how the fuck I'm going to be able to afford this during this dumpster fire of a pandemic when I can't even handle going to the store before getting incredible anxiety. The cost of everything is so, so expensive and its so defeating, I am truly at a loss of everything at this point and its tearing me up. What the fuck am I going to do

No. 624060

>>624055
infact, samefag, spoiler autists are the ones who ruined movies by making creators wanna come up with "unspoilable" plots with soooo many twists and turns i bet you didn't guess what's gonna happen next!! let's all speculate on reddit about the surprise villains!! i bet you didn't guess that, spoiler warnings ahoy!

it's pleb tier. there is more in movies than just about how oooh so surprised you can be by one.

No. 624064

>>624060
>infact, samefag, spoiler autists are the ones who ruined movies by making creators wanna come up with "unspoilable" plots with soooo many twists and turns i bet you didn't guess what's gonna happen next!!

Bitch please. Movie writers did this because they kept shitting out the same plots that movies became predictable and repetitive and critics didn't like that. Shame on you for thinking "le people of reddit" have any influence over Hollywood writers kek holy fuck you actually sound retarded

No. 624065

>>624063
and yet nowadays "hur dur i bet you didn't guess this was the surprise villain" has become predictable too.

it's not just movies, tv series too get ruined by creators not wanting their fans to guess what the plot will be because being able to see how story logically progressess is wrong and bad so writers gotta shit up any logical progression of the stories for muh twists

No. 624067

>>624063
To be fair, a good amount of directors have come out and said that they changed the plot last minute because they really wanted to SHOCK the audience which is a really poor method of writing.

The Russo bros are pretty famous for doing this to their already boring plotlines so they could be hurr durr edgy.

No. 624068

File: 1599390322810.jpg (42.44 KB, 748x711, Efrx5E5VoAEyaSN.jpg)

Why the fuck do I always get "woke" men mansplaining stupid shit to me and why are they always such whiny, bratty pussies when I debate them back? Whoa, it's like the Male Feminists are actually just bitter incels who try to hide their insecurity and scorn for women behind layers of wokeness. Sorry for sperging but I'm just so sick of this happening all the time.

No. 624069

>>624055
You can do that and watch the movie by yourself.

I don't give a fuck about your experience, I care about mine and I don't wanna hear "omg you'll never guess what happens now!!" or "hey pay close attention to what happens here" every time something suspenseful happens or plot changing (which I have experienced and that's why I don't watch movies with people who have already seen it) because it just ruins the whole movie if I am being prepared for anything shocking.

That OR something actually interesting happens and the person I'm with is like "yeah haha I read this was gonna happen on the plot" and at that point they're not feeling the same "in the moment" excitement/betrayal/sadness so I'm left there by myself looking retarded because "what anon?! You didn't see that coming??? when I read the plot it mentioned that the clue was xyz" it's fucking shitty and I hate that feeling

so, I don't care if you spoil things fr yourself but if you're gonna talk me through the movie or not even have the slightest of emotions then fuck you, you're not coming

anon you can't come to the movies with me sorry

No. 624074

>>624068
Based take anon. They're autistic wolves in sheep's clothing.

No. 624077

File: 1599391957729.jpeg (41.14 KB, 750x188, 3A6CBBD4-E90B-424C-90CD-DD01A7…)

Sorry to be anachan but I can’t post this anywhere else without my friends trying way too hard to make sure I’m okay and I just need to vent.


Had eating disorders since I was 13. 21 now. I have always been underweight, sometimes severely, sometimes minorly. Lost my job over quarantine which is where I got most of my exercise, running all over a restaurant, up and down stairs to get everyone’s food. I also decided to learn to properly cook for myself and discovered the joy of weed. This has resulted in actually discovering a love for food. I’ve never known what healthy portion control is because of parents who treated food like a punishment, so as long as I’ve been living by myself, I’ve eaten tiny portions and stayed away from restaurants so people wouldn’t make fun of me for never finishing a plate.

First time I ever finished a normal plate of food was in May. I was so fucking proud. I stopped feeling guilty and wanted to be healthy. So I’ve quite quickly managed to gain about ~15 pounds. However, I’ve always hated exercise so I let that slide a lot. Obviously that’s completely my fault. I noticed my weight gain, but for the first time ever it didn’t bother me. I’m still on the low end of healthy, but I’m actually HEALTHY. I felt good.


Yeah, all of that out the fucking window within a few weeks. First thing my roommate asks me when she came back from quarantine was if I’ve gained weight. Cool. Nice to see you too. Then came the snide comments about me having two bagel thins (not even whole bagels) for breakfast. She couldn’t POSSIBLY put away that much food, how on earth do I do it? Wow, that’s a lot of potatoes with your dinner. You ate a whole medium pizza by yourself? Normally that gives me enough for leftovers!


I finally said something because I was starting to feel guilty again. I completely avoided being in the kitchen with her. If she was cooking when I was hungry, I’d skip that meal. She hasn’t said anything since I snapped at her. I felt bad but I couldn’t take it.


Now, today, it’d been a couple weeks and I start to feel okay again. I even cooked for both of us last night and we had a nice meal and a chat. I posted a photo of myself on Snapchat last night in an outfit where you can clearly see my body shape. It was Saturday, I felt good.


Woke up to a message from some dude I don’t think I’ve ever even met who follows my snap. Pic related.


I don’t fucking know him. I shouldn’t care. I’m 99% sure he’s an asshole who’s trying to neg me so I feel insecure enough to send him nudes and beg for his validation. But I feel like all my progress has been undone. I’ve always seen weight gain as failure. This is the first time in my life I’ve seen it as recovery. I know for a fact I’d have to gain another 40lbs before I have to ever start worrying about my weight. I guess I’ve already been fragile but this message just broke me. Now I feel like a disgusting pig for ever even considering getting up and making breakfast.


Vent over I guess. TLDR I’m a snowflake who let a random man’s opinion make me feel worthless.

No. 624078

>>624051
>how we would be able to afford houses if we stopped buying takeout coffee
Not only what you said about waiting years for it to be true is correct, but that's also implying all of us even go out and get expensive takeout coffee on a regular basis to begin with. Sometimes when I'm bored I try to look for tips and advice online on how to save money and places where I could sell things I don't need anymore and I keep seeing blog posts written by trust fund kids where they just repeat this type of advice.

Same shit with online services like Netflix and how we should unsubscribe from it if we don't plan on watching things all the time. Why do these people all think we even pay that type of shit to begin with?

No. 624080

I hate how codependent I am on my boyfriend.
I had an apartment and missed him so much nightly I would often cry and then eventually go to his apartment at like 2am every time.

I'm about to go out of town for 5 days and feel like crying. Anons how do I stop feeling this way? he is truly the only man who has ever really treated me right so I just don't know what I can do to stop clinging to him

No. 624082

This is going to sound narcissistic I used to be very shallow, exercise, do my make up every day and all that because I believed life is easier when you're pretty . I lost my job due to COVID and once the gyms closed I started piling on weight and wear sweatpants every day, shower once every three days and all that. I never felt safer in public, no men staring or chatting you up. I feel almost invisible and I love it.
I also grew an unhealthy obsession with true crime. I always knew most of the victims were female, but holy shit it gets worse once you learn to know the details. I am surprised I never got in trouble walking home at night from work or a night out. The worst I got was people following me off the public transport. Women get abducted and tortured just for being women and the widespread use of porn and accessibility to gore is making men feral as time passes. Whenever I catch a man staring at me the only thing I think is how he's imagining all the ways they could torture me.

I recommend becoming unapologetic goblins to all anons. For your own safety.

No. 624085

>>624082
I'm sorry anon but I consider myself ugly and fat. I dress frumpy all the time and do my darned best to not make eye contact with men for the exact reason you do (my aunt grew up glued to the ID channel and true crime shit).

And yet, there are two times men have made me very uncomfortable when I dressed and looked horrible. The first time, the guy forced me to kiss him by refusing to move and grabbing my arm so that I couldn't get out of his grip. I couldn't believe it because I was sweaty, my hair was the worst it ever looked (literally bedhead) and I was lugging laundry so heaving and out of breath.

The second time, I was picking up a food order and the old guy kept insisting that he get my phone number and spent the whole time talking to me about where I live and what I'm doing later that night.

See, some men do this thing where they look for a woman that doesn't take care of herself or might not consider herself attractive because they think it makes you an easy target (low self-esteem) so they will consider you weak enough to fall for their shitty male ego. "Omg he wants MY number?? Wow!" And chances are, it works for them most of the time.

Please still always be vigilant. Men know no fucking bounds and chances are that even if you consider yourself your worst, you could still be a target for a very dangerous man.

No. 624086

>>624078
100% it’s bullshit but if the media didn’t sell this version of events, boomers might have to acknowledge that it’s a massive fucking problem that didn’t exist when they were younger

No. 624087

>>624085
NTA but I agree with you both, the amount of unsolicited attention men have given me lessened immediately when I started going out with no makeup wearing shitty jeans/sweatpants and hoodies and my hair all messed up. However I've still gotten men approaching and refusing to leave me alone so it's not a silver bullet to get rid of scrote bullshit. The only way I usually get rid of them is being rude and dismissive because some of them get embarrassed and leave, but then again some of them get even more aggressive and start calling you a whore or turn violent.

But I think back to that one based anon who told a story about how a guy cold approached her while she was on her way to her workplace so she started faking being autistic and made the guy uncomfortable. That was fucking hilarious and I need to try it next time.

No. 624092

>>624087
I find it so strange that women are expected to behave normally in reaction to men being really fucking weird. Pretending to be autistic is a more appropriate reaction imo. It’s sad that a “no, leave me alone” isn’t enough but I guess if you can’t beat them, join them

No. 624093

I just want to be one of those people who always eats well and gets good sleep, and feels healthy and well-rested as a result. Sick of always feeling drained and lethargic, with inconsistent appetite.

No. 624094

>>624093
Same. I've almost forgotten what it is like to feel good, healthy and headache-free.

No. 624095

>>624080
Uh, being attached to someone who treats you right isn't "clinging" - the crying is a bit weird though. How old are you, because the last time I did that shit I was like 15. Maybe just grow up a bit, and express that you miss him in an adult manner?

No. 624096

>>624094
Honestly anon I'm on the verge of a mild breakdown. I just want to feel comfortable and happy in my own body.

No. 624097

File: 1599396773731.jpg (214.29 KB, 968x968, 375910000.jpg)

I regret looking at Soren's recent thread and the thread of that woman with the rotting legs

Why are they like this

No. 624100

>>624095
I'm 24, but I have been through quite a lot. I told him I love him, and that I'll miss him. Still very incredibly difficult to be away from him.

No. 624104

>>624097
who's rotting leg woman?

No. 624105

>>624100
Get therapy sis this isn't normal at all.

No. 624109

Meh, don't listen to >>624105. It's honeymoon phase, it will start to be worrying if it doesn't stop in a few month or so.

No. 624114

>>624109
Um no. >>624105 is correct and anon should be going to therapy. The anon even says that she's codependent… It would be understandable that anon would feel like this if she were 5 or a dog, but she is a 24 year old woman who had to go to her bf's place at 2am! Because she missed him. This isn't normal at all.

No. 624115

>>624114
this. i'm the "correct" anon and i was crazy emotional during my honeymoon phase, but that just seems like going too far. wanting to spend all your time together at first is common, but being absolutely distraught because you can't sleep together isn't.

No. 624118

Before COVID I had my agoraphobia under wraps as much as possible, I was able to go out and whilst I still panicked I could ignore it and do things. I have to go out and to work for the first time tomorrow since COVID and I feel so anxious and scared. I have barely left the house during this entire time and now when I do I just panic and feel scared. I hate this shit.

No. 624121

I dont believe all men are trash but I've had very few good experiences with them…
>age 9 molested by brother
>age 10 dropped on my face by dad now I dont have two front teeth
>in middle school random boys bullying me or sexually harassing me
>age 19 lose my virginity to a guy who told me he loved me. Proceeds to ignore and use me for sex
>go through a sterm of shitty abusive guys
>take a trip to tokyo and some Indian guy tries to rape me
>have to deal with guys in dating resenting me because I'm not up to their standard physically or socially, even though it was THEIR CHOICE to date me. Why dont men just leave women they dont like alone in peace?its not my fault you cant get stacy dont take it out on me
>end up married to a man child who cant even fry and egg
>get divorced and try date again and I see the same bullshit from previous relationships but now too old and smart to be taken advantage of
>every guy I've come into contact under the age of 30 cant do basic shit like cook their own meals

I just wish I could be lesbian or meet a woman who is ok with platonic intimacy

No. 624135

>>624080

It's important to realise clinginess and codependency can push people away, especially men. Of course there's nothing wrong with being sad because you miss them, but the fact it's affecting your ability to spend one night alone and you're seeking advice shows it's at least getting to a point of concern.

Honestly, best advice is to just learn how to enjoy time on your own. Often when I get the clingiest to my bf it's because I don't have any hobbies or interests on the go that keep me entertained and my self esteem suffers cos of it. Meet up with friends, family. Pick up new hobbies or revisit interests and things you haven't done in a while. Do things just for yourself that make you excited to get home after a long day. He will probably appreciate it too if it gives him a chance to do things he wants that maybe doesnt interest you. Sounds like you haven't lived together for too long but you will come to cherish time apart.

No. 624163

>>624086
Yes it's a weird mix of boomers in denial and the media making them think they're actually correct and previous economic issues all over the planet still don't have consequences right now. Even though the pandemic ruined everything for a lot of people, me included and probably for many anons here too, it's just one more issue to add to the list, even if it's a bigger, more obvious one.

No. 624174

Animal crossing was such a waste of money. It was fun for the first week when it first came out, but after that..boring.

No. 624183

>>624174
You should have sold your switch for a 3x return like I did during the big pandemic Switch shortage

No. 624189

>>624174
The one on the Switch? I kinda agree, I only got it like last month and accumulated 70h of play time so far but I can't be bothered to go back to it. I barely touched it these past two weeks and I never really time traveled except for when I wanted to have more resources like stones or sticks and didn't want to wait 24h for them to reappear. I'm having way more fun with other games right now and if I don't feel like going back to it in a few months I'll either give it to a friend or sell it.

I spent so much time and had so much fun playing on the DS and 3DS though, I don't get it. Like I think I have 200h of play time with New Leaf and I never time traveled, I just played a few minutes everyday for a few years.

No. 624192

>>624189
can I ask what other games you are enjoying? Are they on the switch?

No. 624199

>>624192
On the Switch so far I've played FE3H, Bayonetta, Bayonetta 2, Catherine Fullbody, I preordered a physical copy of Super Mario 3D Allstars because I want to be able to replay Sunshine and Galaxy on the go. And I plan on getting more stuff like Astral Chain, the Wonderful 101, Xenoblade Chronicles 1 and 2. My sister is ok with me borrowing Zelda Breath of the Wild and Super Mario Odyssey, they both look very fun but I want to play what I already have because I also want to play some 3DS games I've never had time to start.

I'm not sure I'm gonna buy Pokemon Sword Shield because I've played all the mainline games in the series, remakes included, and I feel like I'll be even more disappointed with that one than with Sun/Moon. If I can get a cheap second hand copy then why not, but I don't like how Game Freak has to release half-assed games once a year just so the Pokemon Company can sell merchandises asap. It feels like they're turning into Disney and I don't want to support that shit.

No. 624246

>>624174
I just opened the game after a couple months of not playing and god it feels like a chore. I want to get rid of a lot of my flowers and maybe terraform but it will literally take hours so it’s not worth it.

No. 624249

I take great joy in the fact that my abusive ex-stepmom is botched af from her numerous plastic surgeries. She's got one nipple an inch higher than the other, a fucked up nosejob which gave her one gaping nostril and one slit nostril, and her two brazillian butt lifts made her ass a square molar. Not to mention the litres of filler and botox in her face that make her look like a shiny bloated wax sculpture.
Petty, but after everything she did to my brothers and I, I'm glad that appearance-obsessed bitch looks a permanent mess.

No. 624250

>>624246
OT but I'm like this with every game, if I a long break (months) from it I can't play anymore.

No. 624271

I just feel really fucking depressed for no reason. I'm on my period too so I don't know if that's why. but I also ran out of abilify. I just want to fucking die

No. 624275

>>623735
ah you're welcome anon, I really do understand how you feel rn. It's awful to deal with so much guilt, but you're human and you will make mistakes. The truly terrible people aren't those that fuck up, but those that fuck up without taking accountability and changing. GET your ass to therapy and eventually, these overwhelming feelings will pass. Good luck!

No. 624283

i just dropped my fucking computer bc i put it on the edge of the bed and then sat on the bed, which made it dip and the computer slid off. thank god it's fine but i could've fucked myself over bad if anything broke. holy shit

No. 624306

I can't stop eating. I have been sick for a week now and i'm much better today. My appetite is never satisfied (started being that way yesterday) and it's starting to get very annoying. I ate half a watermelon after supper yesterday and was still super hungry. My stomach feels like it's constantly burning from hunger and I have no idea why and it's stressing me out.

No. 624312

File: 1599427350274.jpeg (19.33 KB, 235x275, FB0AAB16-A122-459E-A4E8-C3DE08…)

shout out to the fuckhead loudly commenting on the length of my shorts at the store today.
sorry you have a gross man ass no one wants to see, now shut the fuck up

No. 624316

>>622665
Fuck this dermatitis or whatever other skin disease is plaguing my face right now, this anti fungal scream stings.

No. 624326

>>624312
Ew, what a dickhead.

I will never understand why people do that, there was this vid of some old guy and meth head looking girlfriend harassing some teen over her shorts lenght. Poor girl looked like she wanted to cry.

No. 624350

>>624326
Seriously, it took me by surprise. When I do dress boldly (or comfortably in this situation), I’ve only ever gotten looks. I’ve never heard a stranger just blatantly criticize me like that. Just let us live our lives, damn.
what’s even better is that he was with what looked like a preteen boy, great thing to teach a kid!

No. 624358

>>622665

i hate myself because i feel like i'm literally proving incels right by being so attracted to "dark triad" men

No. 624380

File: 1599435727442.jpeg (91.39 KB, 682x670, MY.JPEG)

>>624312
Fucking scum that guy. At my fucking limit with men who do this. My sister moved out into a big city with her bf and recently had some guy follow her around in a pharmacy store making comments about her dress.
Couldn't fucking shop for her chips in peace. She also has some old ass fucker making kissy noises at her from his car. Ugh, makes me wish I was there with to accompany her.

No. 624399

hahaha i was in a steady hookup situation and just got bailed on.

the last two times he wouldn't fuck me because he "forgot a condom.

pretty sure he was fucking around the whole time. god damnit.

No. 624401

File: 1599442619694.jpeg (732.32 KB, 1242x973, 1596866135100.jpeg)

My dad once told my sister, who had just lost a friend/boyfriend in a fire that maybe it should've been my sister instead. What the fuck is wrong with men. He also drove my sister to the funeral, waited in the car and hurried her to get back, I just do not understand why he was so unbelievably cruel. I know we all have our traumatic backstories but what the hell did anyone gain from that, my dude?

No. 624402

>>624401
What the fuck is wrong with him? How did he justify his shitty behavior?

No. 624405

>>624401
lemme guess, narcissist?

No. 624407

My mom is getting out of the hospital in a couple of days after two minor surgeries (she's been in there for about 2 weeks) and her job is forcing her to quit because she ran out of sick days and vacation days a week ago? Like I'm legit pissed off because they expect her to come back to work when her doctor explicitly told her she can't work. I'm having massive anxiety attacks because even though she was planning on retiring next month, her ssi won't kick in for 3 months and we have bills and shit to pay and I've been looking for a job with no luck. I'm fucking useless, because I have no experience no one will hire me and I'm nearly 30. I'm such a fucking joke jesus christ I hate being mentally ill.

No. 624410

>>624407
You're beating yourself up for being 30 and not having a job, but your mom is retirement age and can't cover 3 months of expenses? A 6 month emergency fund is a pretty standard expectation for being financially stable. Sorry to be harsh but that's concerning and it sounds like she can't actually afford to retire.

No. 624413

>>624410
Are we shaming people for not being able to retire? Christ.

No. 624417

>>624410

If Anon is American, you understand that having that kind of savings is a luxury for the majority of people, right?

No. 624419

my friend is becoming an autogyn. he recently "came out" nonbinary. saying that dressing like a girl and getting confused for one makes him feel powerful. even my weird liberal friend is super put off by it. shit is creepy and gross dude.

No. 624420

>>624413
>>624417
I'm not trying to shame or judge anon's mom, I can see why it came off that way but I know it's normal and not some failing on her part. I'm saying if anon's mom isn't financially stable yet, anon shouldn't be taking all the blame for their financial difficulties. It's a shared burden. And unfortunately the reality is that not everyone can afford to retire just because they're old enough.

No. 624423

>>624410
>>624410

Anon, I'm american and from a poor family. How can you save when after paying rent and bills and putting food on the table doesn't leave you with much of anything. Also doesn't help when you make just over the threshold limit for government help.

No. 624426

>>624410
You know how fucking bad the American economy and poverty line is? Yeah most people literally can't afford to retire, it's a form of economic slavery and not even federal mandated minimum wage is enough for most families.

No. 624427

>>624420
Hi anon with mom in hospital/poor background post as well. Yeah no you came off as very shitty. My mom was planning on getting a part time after some time to help with financial strain (you can't start working for a certain time period after ssi? If I remember hearing her correctly, also can't earn more then your ssi income.) So she wasn't really retiring in that sense of the word. She was planning on having some extra cash because of retiring in October. Buuuuut since she wouldnt be able to go back to work until hopefully October, there is no income. And no savings because can't save what you don't have.

No. 624428

>>624427
Anon, it might not be the most helpful but has she considered talking to her employer?

Look into FMLA law in your state:
https://www.dol.gov/sites/dolgov/files/WHD/legacy/files/employeeguide.pdf

No. 624429

>>624428
Same anon here. Sorry for assuming you're American if you're not - just sounds like shitty labor practice so I'm assuming American by default.

No. 624430

Got myself on Tinder and within the night had two twenty something able to hold really decent conversation wanting to fuck me.
I guess I'm not as repulsive as I thought and the whole 30yoISTHEWALL and nobody will ever want to touch you again really fucked me up.
wtf.

No. 624431

>>624429
Naw you're correct. Also there would be no point in going after them legally. Cause if she won, and was able to go back to work in October, she'd be retiring at the end of the month and she wouldn't be getting any income for this missed month. She doesn't have benefits or a pension with them either so I doubt she'd see the point in doing it.

No. 624432

>>624431
>>624429

Also to add to this I am going to talk to her about it anyways, sorry I'm really spacey at the moment.

No. 624433

>>624430
I'm 30 and I've had tons of younger guys try to fuck me on tinder. Even got cat fished by a 16 year old.
It is me who is repulsed by them, not the other way around.

No. 624435

>>624433
Welp, I guess if I got them all the time, it would be grossbut it's new so let me have it ffs.

No. 624436

>>624430
>>624433
>>624435
young guys are the best. not under 20 though.

No. 624437

>>624435
No matter how old we get men will always desire us sexually. That's just how it is.
The wall really only applies to men.

No. 624439

Kinda resent the fact that my mom won't agree to euthanize our elderly dog. I love the shit out of that dog but damn, she can hardly walk, we have to lift her to go outside or to go to another room and she's 70lbs and hardly has the strength to at least stay standing when we do lift her. She pisses off and on in the house, her ass is crusted in shit because she can hardly get off the ground, she fucking breathes like she's suffocating, and her teeth are in such poor shape it honestly looks painful when she eats (and she only eats soft and moistened food). All she does is lay around all day. No playing, nothing. I only see her motivated when we're eating food, and all she does then is just stare at us wide-eyed with her cataracts. I'm surprised she can even see anything tbh.
I just want to give her a really good last day full of treats and love but instead I just have to watch her suffer every single fucking day because my mom can't look at the situation from any other perspective than her own.
I've shared my thoughts, fucking cried about how horrible it is to see her the way she is, and it doesn't change her mind.
I'm afraid of it, but I also wish she would just pass away in her sleep already. I'll never be ready for when she does go, but I hate this so much and I want her to have peace. I'm also just afraid that she'll just pass without any proper goodbye. Like, what if her last day is just like every other day? Painful and boring, and she just watches us play with and hug our younger dogs?
Elderly dogs are sweet yet so sad ugh

No. 624440

>>624077
Anon I’m really not trying to fuel paranoia but is it possible the dude account is someone you know? Block it regardless, whoever it is doesn’t actually think that and ONLY said that to upset you. Don’t let it discourage you. Keep making progress, fuck everyone else.

No. 624462

I feel like more and more often people just don’t respond to stuff I send them or my messages to them. It makes me feel really annoying and then makes me want to just pull away and stop trying to say anything to them.

No. 624463

>>624462
And I should clarify it’s not just ignoring me because they just send me something else completely unrelated

Like… do you actually want to converse with me? Am I just obnoxious even when I’m talking about a thing you like? Am I taking this way too seriously because the pandemic is driving me insane? Who knows.

No. 624468

>>624439


Your mom makes me so angry. Honestly, if I was in your position I would contact animal protection.
Taking a pet also means letting go when the time comes and that poor dog must be suffering.

Make every day to your dog like it would be her last. Give her lots of love and treats.

No. 624470

I wish I felt empathy. Like I don’t want people who I like to suffer or have a bad time, but if they do I really don’t care. It’s exhausting to have to pretend so many feelings, and I feel like you can hear it in my voice when I’m trying to console someone that it’s disingenuous.

No. 624478

File: 1599459213782.jpeg (157.27 KB, 960x960, A90C1466-79E3-437B-BD6B-6B4F49…)

Sent nudes to my bf, he asked for them cause we were sexting and I was feeling insecure, he didn’t even say I looked good or anything just continued sexting me. What’s the point of me sending the picture if he’s not going to at least tell me he likes it. Idk anons maybe this isn’t a big deal but now I just feel kinda bummed especially since it’s my second time sending them ever, so it took a lot out of me.

No. 624482

>>624478

Aww anon I get it; I'm in the same boat on the body insecurity thing. Compliments mean the world especially when you're sending nudes of all things. Like…I've sent nudes to my boyfriend and I will sometimes feel bad about my body when I do it but then he'll give me a compliment on it and I'll be over the moon and not feeling so bad. Maybe talk to your boyfriend about it, maybe he doesn't realize how it makes you feel, that's the only thing I can think of, just be honest and tell him whats going on.

No. 624489

I have this strong need to defy my parents in the form of telling them how they fucked up with me and how much I hate that they didn’t care or put enough effort into my life. I never did this as a teen or even a kid. I never complained, never was rude or demanding, I was very quiet. I think I’m acting like a teen mentally, except in my early 20s. I hate that I feel this way, but I’m so upset with life and I feel like so much of my hardship is linked to them not providing or being emotionally available. I already told them once about it and they just kind of dismissed me/ said a half ass sorry. I keep feeling the need to do it . It’s so embarrassing.

No. 624491

>>624478
I feel you anon. If you can stomach it then tell him you'd like some positive feedback. I know it's weird to ask but men usually don't pick up on those things. It's worth asking for!

No. 624495

>>624489
Their response definitely wasn't near satisfying and that's all we want from confronting those who've wronged us, a satisfying conclusion whether it be through apology or whatever. Unfortunatley people aren't on the same wavelengths and they're probably confused as to why you're doing this suddenly which is dogshit but also means a satisfying response from them is hugely unlikely and at some point it has to be let go for your own sake. Not saying get over it right now, just be aware. I'm sorry anon, oblivious parents are certainly something.

No. 624501

>>624489
Sounds like you’ve repressed your feelings for a long time and finally cracked. They probably won’t understand so it’s best to prepare yourself for that and validate your own emotions and experiences

No. 624507

I think the inconsistency of my partner triggers my anxious attachment style. Maybe I'm addicted and not in love.

No. 624518

>>624121
>end up married to a man child who cant even fry and egg

Why the fuck did you marry him?

No. 624519

>>624433
If you're repulsed by them, why do you swipe them?

No. 624527

>be me, 18
>start having stomach problems, like strong nausea
>go get tests, nothing shows up
>still goes to doctor because everything still makes me retch
>i put strong emphasis on the fact that I have strong physical symptoms
>"you're lying anon, you have an ED and that's just an excuse"
>my parents believe that as well
>stop going to doctor and just wait for it to pass on it's own
>it doesn't, I lose a lot of weight in the span of like a year because it's difficult to eat
>get dragged to the hospital
>they see that there's nothing wrong in the tests as usual
>they don't let me leave
>i get forcefully hospitalized in the ana-chans recovery place, I explain my symptoms and they don't believe me
>i get threatened to be put in a mental hospital if I complain any further
>shut up, 5 months pass as i get treated like an ana-chan
>at some point therapist guesses it was just anxiety lol, you don't have ed now get the fuck out of my office
>gets out of treatment, still feel like shit, but now every hospital in the province knows i've got that diagnosis
>mother still believes it's ed, controls everything i eat and threatens me to bring me back to the hospital if i dare to say that i'm not hungry or nauseous

My early twenties sure are good.
At least i still got the xanax from when i was in treatment.

No. 624534

File: 1599471524277.gif (2.67 MB, 336x252, dental-anxiety.gif)

I'm 25, I've never been on a job interview (social anxiety, worked for years but I've always gotten those jobs through contacts) and I dread the day I have to do one.
I'm shitting my pants just thinking about all those weird questions I'm told they ask, like "What are your biggest strengths?" and "Where do you see yourself in five years?" and all that shit. A friend of mine even told me they asked her what animal she would be and why.
I know, I need to get over it and grow up, but man, I know myself and I know that I will probably just go mute, start to stutter or act too casual. How the fuck will I ever get a job?

No. 624539

I hate my fucking job and I've been shitting on it for months but can't bring myself to resign. I've been looking for a new one, but not getting callbacks which sort of affirms my belief that I have no valuable skills whatsoever. I'm thinking of making up jobs on my cv or just omit my useless degree altogether and work in a kitchen or something. I just need money for fucks sake

No. 624542

>>624539
It's not about your skills, it's about the market. I know a lot of people who had no skills and qualifications getting nice jobs just because they knew the right people or randomly sent one application in total at the right time and place but now with all the things going on all over the planet it's difficult to find a job even if you're qualified and have the skills employers are usually looking for and it's super frustrating.

No. 624544

>>624534
There was not a single interview at which they would not ask me these two questions you've mentioned, so since you already know it will happen, why not prepare yourself? There's a lot of resources online on how to answer them in the best way, so just spend some time to research, and once you feel more prepared, you'll feel more confident too.
People getting nervous during interviews are a normal thing, so don't worry if you happen to stutter. And casual approach is very often welcomed, depending on the atmosphere in the place you'll be applying to, so that might work as your advantage. You'll do fine.

No. 624548

File: 1599474115293.jpg (104 KB, 1024x768, bear-hug.jpg)

>>624527
I'm so sorry anon. I would be fucking livid if this happened to me. Have a hug

No. 624551

>>624544
Thanks for your reply, anon, that was actually pretty helpful!
I'm not currently looking for a new job but I'm gonna move soon so that's probably when I'll have to go on my first job interviews, so I have some time to prepare myself for the inevitable…

No. 624553

>>624548
Some days like today I'm still livid about it, but I know it's better to move on. I'll take your hug anon, have one back.

No. 624559

File: 1599477791713.png (99.78 KB, 352x345, 024.png)

My drawings got posted on 4chan again, for the second time now. It makes me want to stop posting them, I wish only girls could see my drawings.

No. 624562

>>624542
>it's about the market
I want to believe this, but two of my ex-coworkers were fired and they both managed to find a job in two weeks and they don't even have degrees. I think I am the problem

>>624534
>they asked her what animal she would be and why
Wtf…I wonder what the correct answer to that question is. What did your friend say?

No. 624567

jesus fucking christ why does everything small thing turn into a giant fight in this house. It's exhausting. My mom misinterprets something and then fucking erupts, and when you try and explain to her whats actually happening she gets even more angry at the thought of being wrong.

No. 624568

I am an absolute train wreck of a human being. I'm an unstable, manipulative, dishonest bitch of a cunt and should probably just kill myself. I use people to try and ease the constant emotional pain I'm in but I (obviously) end up hurting them a lot. I don't do it out of malice but it doesn't matter because the end result is the same anyway, right? I hate myself. I've hurt so many people this year alone.

No. 624574

>>624402
>>624405
He never felt the need to explain shit to us, I just pieced together that his family life wasn't easy so he was a rich sad boy who grew up to be an asshole drunk. In my humble opinion he was narcissistic and possibly bipolar, a very draining scary man, rip to his ass I guess.

No. 624575

Just rejected a cute girl because I'm so ashamed of being bisexual. I feel so disgusted at myself for not being straight. I try to live as a straight woman but the missed connections really hurt. I don't feel worthy of a womans time when it comes to dating. I feel like some creepy predator for being attracted to them.

God she was exactly my type

No. 624576

>>624575
Anon whyyyyy? I'd say try to make up with her and ask her out otherwise it's gonna haunt you

No. 624577

>>624575
Anon you're stupid as fuck, she's the one who asked you out to begin with. Go talk to her like >>624576 said.

No. 624578

>>624575 agreed, go talk to her and go for it

No. 624581

>>624568
Apologize to the people you've hurt if you're still in contact with them and get DBT NOW. If you can't access it, read some self-help materials and try to work on yourself. You're going to ruin your life if you don't stop acting like an impulsive retard. Borderlines can become less destructive to themselves and people around them. Just commit to therapy anon, you still have hope.

No. 624584

File: 1599484759025.jpeg (25.04 KB, 300x250, 9B33DC1A-99ED-4C73-BBD9-1A3CA6…)

Had another exploding head syndrome episode last night and it was so fucking scary. It’s like I’m having sleep paralysis and dying at the same time. Now I’m even more sleep deprived.

No. 624587

My whole family abused the shit out of me and raised me to be a failure. My life fell to pieces in high school with a string of deaths and sexual abuse at home. Now everyone I know has a career and all I have a failed suicide attempt that I didnt really bounce back from. I never fit in at my shitty entry level jobs and I’m never taken seriously. I wish I could have just died!!! I’m proud of myself for being here and working through most of the shit but I still don’t feel like anyone would be my friend. Other than to be their personal cow

No. 624590

Holy fuck the best buy website is absolute garbage. For a fucking tech company their website is fucked. Constant page reloading, I keep getting sent to random pages I didn’t click on, it keeps scrolling me back to the top of the page, and their magnus opus is the fact that my cart keeps emptying itself. I’ll put something in my cart, the hell website will take me to my cart to show me my cart even though I do not want to see it I just want to fucking add something, and then when I click the “continue shopping” button, MY CART FUCKING EMPTIES ITSELF. I’m just trying to estimate the cost of a new laptop and things before I go in to spec search but holy fucking hell I’m about to punch the screen out on my computer.

No. 624593

>>624587
I know you feel like you are falling behind but most of the people around haven't gone through what you have, I am glad you are still here fighting the darkness mo matter how lame that sounds. Bitch, you don't need to be doing the same stuff others are doing at the same exact pace, you are so good and tough for keeping up even though you've wanted to die. Please be gentle with yourself sometimes, you're a tough bitch but take it easy on yourself too.

No. 624599

>>624567 same anon. After I wrote this, another situation happened which again involved misinterpretation. I smelt gas outside, which is obviously concerning, but I phrased it like 'god, it smells bad out here' and my mom thought I was telling her that she smelt bad. I then tried to explain that I was referring to the smell of gas, but it was too late and she had already exploded.

No. 624601

>>624581
Thanks anon. I'm in the process of starting therapy and I do also read self-help books. I'm not borderline though, I'm bipolar but it manifests similarly in relationships. This year has been especially rough for obvious reasons though so I've behaved way more destructive than usual.

No. 624636

File: 1599493417595.jpeg (29.65 KB, 300x250, 336986DD-FB8C-4BF5-8115-1308C3…)

>>624593
Thanks anon! You helped lift my spirits. I’ll try to remember what you’ve said when I’m being hard on myself

No. 624637

File: 1599493720511.jpg (28.08 KB, 700x700, cca4d418f806e0a03eb42031239200…)

My feelings for a close friend of mine haunt me. Each time I thought I'd gotten over it and moved on, we spend some time together and everything comes crashing back.
It's become more manageable with time since my care gradually exceeds my need for romance, but it isn't going away permanently as I'd hoped. Logically, we aren't even compatible and the situation is bad, but I think I feel genuine love for once.

I want to continue the friendship forever of course, because of the love, but I just wish it was different. And of course I'll always wonder what it is about me that prevents him from feeling the same.

No. 624642

my parents don't know that my brother molested me when i was 8 and tried to do it again when I was 16 and whenever i try to avoid him they just think i'm being unreasonable/ a bitch for no reason. i love my parents but i can't tell them about what happened because they'll disown him and he'll probably kill himself because he's really depressed. i don't know if he's aware of what he's done because nowadays he's acting as if we're best friends and confides in me with all his secrets while i passively listen to him because i like to think that he's trying to change, even though i am really fucking afraid of him and he's one of the reasons why i don't want to ever have children.
no one irl knows this and i like to think about this as a secret i'm taking to my grave.

No. 624648

>>624642
You shouldn’t take this to your grave, anon. You yourself said he tried again when you were 16–he’s aware of what he did. I don’t know how old he is, but if he were just as young when you were 8, there’s a chance he was also molested and was only acting out what he experienced. He needs help. If that isn’t the case, he is dangerous because he attempted to molest you a second time and there’s always a chance he will offend again. You don’t want it to happen to another girl, I know you don’t.

No. 624649

Slept most of the day away on meds. I'm still so fucking tired. I feel like could sleep for a damn week if people would leave me alone. I'm taking my fucking meds (bupropion). Why do I still feel like I've been up for wekk ? (well, maybe I've been but you can't really use it as an excuse :/)

No. 624652

ugh okay I have this male friend who really doesnt have a clue about anyhting he is as selfish as it gets, he says he is all about kindness and wokeness and what not. but when him and his roomates found a stay cat that followed him home he right away shoved that cat to one of his roomates, lol so much for being woke and caring for the animals! whatever. this guy is such a fucking fake about everything he says, from being there as a friend but its always about him. he lacks empathy 100% but then again most males lack empathy. He also says he doesnt care for apperances but when this landwhale confessed his feelings to him he right away was like "nah fuck that" and he told her shit like "I am more in to people with smaller figures" lol yehh! seriously I cant stand him anymore! I hope he finds a girlfriend soon so he fucking leaves me alone.

No. 624656

>>624562
I don't remember what she said, unfortunately, it was last year and I was too shocked to hear that they ask these kinds of questions at a job interview to really remember what else she said.

No. 624657

File: 1599496573039.jpg (48.75 KB, 670x680, IMG_20200907_183511.jpg)

Am I a horrible person?
A family member of mine is going through depression because they prefer their NEET lifestyle rather than working (to a point where she quit a job that was offered by a friend 3 months after), and she is that kind of a person who would prefer everyone to throw pity parties around her so she would get attention rather than actually trying to do something about her life, even therapist nor pills don't help because she always prefers trying to bait people into attention bcz muh mental illness, along with using that as a card to avoid helping her family and be a rude person.

Her lovely mother and grandmother are distressed and worried about her, they are amazing people but they do not know what to even do and I hate seeing them hurting all because all this woman does is locks herself in the room, plays videogames until morning and makes up dramas on her discord server.

I couldn't sleep all night thinking of how horrible I feel by seeing their whole house feeling sad and whatnot. Kept debating all night If I should buy this NEET-chan a comfort gift, thinking it'd make the situation better but then I remembered all the two-faced stuff she did to me because of how obsessed she is with being the center of attention (along with her jealousy of women and complex of seeing them as a threat like shuwu-chan, just the rightwing version that is also convinced that no woman has to work a job because they are built for men and housework) I decided to not to. And it still makes me feel horrible even though I know I would rather take care of someone who actually respects me and is worth caring about.

No. 624658

>>624648
he's 5 years older and the thing is, nowadays he's going to therapy and i do hope everything is going well for him with that. that's basically one of the reasons why i feel like i can't hold what he did against him, because he's getting help so he can sort out his life. from what he's told me i feel like he's in such a fragile mental state that he's one last push away to killing himself. i know i might sound like a whiny bitch but believe me anon when i tell you i've thought about him doing this to other girls and that just added to my disgust and self hatred because of my inability to tell someone.

No. 624673

I hate that I can't be braless at home because then my mom starts yelling at me for having saggy boobs. In a bra they are supported so they don't look saggy and it keeps my mom's anger at bay but man, I tried going braless one time and I really liked the feeling till mom started insulting my tiddies. Wanna move out but I'm poor

No. 624682

>>624636
I hope you do! You are your worst critic and forget how unnecessary strong you have been and are, i fucking care for you and am rooting for you sis.

No. 624684

File: 1599499424682.jpg (41.89 KB, 680x507, EO6yJRAWAAAaHFD.jpg)

it's so fucking annoying how things i like remind me of shitty scrotes even just for a second, whether it be music, art, or games. i don't even want to spend more than a second thinking about them and i just get triggered so easily. i wonder if i'll be a bpdfag who enters the same cycle of being in shitty relationships for the rest of my life. it's hard to not have my self-esteem completely destroyed after this shit happening to me consistently. i hope i can somehow pick up getting more in touch with my love of fashion (which then spurs me on to get attention for good fashion taste or looks, lol) and learn how to finally do makeup… christ

No. 624688

>>624673
I'm sorry you have to deal with that. That's incredibly awful, especially coming from your own mother. Mothers should help build self-esteem, not try and tear it down.

No. 624698

i feel so trapped. i've become depressed living with my family and know i need to move out for my own mind and heart's sake, but i live in a "Trendy" city so rent is astronomical (or it feels that way). if i want to pay less than $1000 for rent for a one bedroom, i'd have to live in the part of town that everyone regards as unsafe and scary (or i'd just have to move pretty far away to get out of the high rent bubble. but i work in the city so i can't go that far). i don't even know what i can afford, i bring home $720 a week so i guess i could afford a one bedroom, but i'm not even sure since i have monthly student loan payments too. i have no friends that i could be roommates with. i'm scared to find random roommates to live with in the middle of a pandemic. i wish i could talk with someone knowledgeable and learn about what i can actually afford and realistically what my options are

No. 624710

I'm so afraid and paranoid that my ex is tracking me somehow. I've scanned my computer dozens of times and it came up with nothing, but I'm still angry and worried. I wish he would just die so I don't have to think about this anymore. I also wish that everyone would stop telling me to get over what happened.

No. 624712

>>624673
Your mom is an insecure twat. Fuck her. I'm sorry anon.

No. 624713

>>624649
Oversleeping can actually make you feel tired rather than well-rested. How long have you been on the meds for?

No. 624720

File: 1599504038911.png (132.67 KB, 500x519, 1595445596171.png)

My stepdad (is he even my stepdad anymore if he and my mother are divorcing due to his infidelity?) is literally a nightmare to rent with but between him and either having roomed with my emotionally toxic mother, or a complete stranger after my last breakup, he was the lesser of two evils at the time. I wish I made enough to live on my own.
I'm in a relationship with a new guy and I feel vindicated that he's starting to witness the nonsense behavior I put up with from my stepdad. For one thing, my mom spoiled him in that she never demanded he do any share of housework. So not only does he not do chores on a consistent basis, but when he finally does one thing, he acts like a fucking martyr for it. He behaves like I don't do shit because I refuse to pick up after him and instead treat him like a roommate and not a spoiled husband just getting to flop at home after he gets back from work–which he does anyway. I work too and no one does my laundry, cook my meals, or cleans my apartment. Boyfriend has stayed over a couple of nights so we have used the kitchen to cook meals. We've been doing the dishes consistently, cleaning the kitchen, and taking out the trash for the past couple of weeks. Stepdad decides to "deep clean" the kitchen the other day. But really: just cleaned off the countertops and wiped off the dishrack and then acted indignant that the kitchen was a "disaster" until he fucking cleaned it. I wanted to punch him in the mouth. Even my boyfriend thought he was full of shit but we can't say anything to upset King Shithead and remind him that the one chore he did in the past two weeks isn't a big fucking deal while we were the ones taking out his pizza boxes to the dumpster and putting his cereal bowls and coffee mugs in the dishwasher, then restocking them in the cupboards when they are clean!

Then there's the living room situation. Since we rent a two-bedroom apartment, the living room/kitchen area are combined in the same space. Well, King Shithead gets reign over the entire area including the patio from the time he gets home from work everyday 4pm, to when he goes to bed (if he doesn't sleep on the couch) which is 9-10pm. I work 9-5pm so I never get that fucking tv unless I want to begin watching something at around 10 or 11pm nightly. Weekends? Forget it, he gets the living room all day because he's a loser and never goes out unless his floozy gf who totes isn't just playing him invites him to go do something on his dime with her like once a month. Speaking of, he's driving her and her rugrats to the beach today so they can go play house, meanwhile I'm never invited on their outings–I'd be completely alone if my bf wasn't here with me (same King Shithead who made me stay at a roach motel for a week before Christmas and made me buy him weed for him and his gf so they could fuck at the apartment uninterrupted). He doesn't love me, I'm just convenient…but I digress.

The living room/kitchen situation pisses me off so much because if I dare ask for it during his time he tantrums and acts like a petulant toddler. Like if I let him know the day before that my bf is coming over and how I'd like to have the tv in the evening so I can watch Netflix with him, he goes "Oh, gonna make me go to my room HUH." in an insolent tone like it's a fucking punishment for asking him to relinquish the tv for an evening. As if he can't entertain himself some other way! I'm in my room all the fucking time when I'm here because he's hogging the living space but I can't dare complain!!!
The other night he had some weirdo ripper movie streaming on the tv and the volume was so loud that me and my bf couldn't eat the delicious dinner I prepped for us without being able to hear ourselves think.
The next night when me and bf got dinner, while King Shithead was out on the patio having his half-hour cig session, I had the audacity to turn the tv volume from 38 down to a dull roar 15. The second we open our dinners, that shithead comes back inside and was posturing to turn the volume back up right as we were about to begin our meal. I quickly said to keep the volume low. "HUAAAH?!" he said. I repeated to keep the volume low and again he went "HUUUH?!" He looked so fucking annoyed and irritated that a demand had left my lips. He was pretending like he didn't get what I was asking so I had to explain it out. I said how I turned the volume down and I didn't want him to turn it back up again. He became so fucking angry at me. "WHY!!!!!!!" he demanded. "Because we're going to eat dinner and we'd like to be able to talk to each other and actually hear." I turned around to gets us drinks, stepdad whined "OH SO IT'S ALLLLL ABOUT YOU HUH?!!?!" I just muttered to myself like oh god…"YEAH WE'RE NOT GONNA ARGUE ABOUT THIS RIGHT NOW," he snapped.
My bf didn't say anything cause he doesn't want to upset the manbaby and pour gas on the fire, but it's so hard to ignore the mistreatment. Sometimes when he treats me like shit, I want to turn around and ask if he'd talk to his girlfriend like how he talks to me? Seeing him being so nice and accommodating for her and playing house with her young brats makes me want to be sick. She's just using him for trips and dinners, but I'd seriously laugh if she would commit the mistake of moving in with this no value man because I reckon his mask would slip with the quickness like it did with me.

No. 624724

I fucking hate when people make that noise of tongue unsticking from the roof of their mouth and their lips opening before they speak. I literally see red, my body physically reacts to that sound. Visceral disgust.

No. 624729

>>624658 you shouldn't be feeling bad, when he's the predator though. Depression or whatever doesnt excuse his behaviour. He might just be telling you that shit so you don't tell anyone.

No. 624730

I never know where I stand on the social scale. Sometimes I think I'm equal to my peers and respected, then someone will say something that completely makes me feel inferior or shit about myself. They'll make fun of me for something, or call me weird, and it just makes me wonder who I am to other people. I will think I'm being completely normal and someone will be like "woah, you're at a 10 , take it down" and other times I'll be told that I look pissed and that I need to talk more. fuck.

No. 624737

>>624642
>because they'll disown him and he'll probably kill himself because he's really depressed
That seems like a good thing to me though.

No. 624768

I am so tired of nobody taking the effects of my former abusive relationship seriously. It doesn't matter how many times I explain how bad the situation was, how many details I recount, everyone still seems to think that it wasn't that bad and that I should be over it by now. Because I didn't have a huge emotional melt down while I was IN the relationship, because he left me and not the other way around, and because he never hit me or sexually abused me, it couldn't have POSSIBLY been that bad. You know, discounting the fact that I was completely isolated from my support system and had virtually no means of leaving him. My last therapist just silenced me whenever I tried to bring up the relationship and would be like "let's focus on you." She chalked all of my issues up to me having a "self-esteem problem." It was fucking humiliating and invalidating. People just refuse to acknowledge the insidiousness of emotional abuse. The only people who have ever understood where I'm coming from are those who have been through similar relationships.

Nobody gives a fuck about your pain unless you were hit or raped. Well, I fucking wish to christ that he had. Things had reached a point towards the end that I was actually begging him to just hit me already. I wish that he had so that I had some fucking proof other than just my words, which are just never enough for anyone.

This man wanted to see me suffer. He targeted me at my lowest point and just twisted the knife in deeper. He got off on my pain. I have screenshot fucking proof of him admitting that he gets off on hurting women, but I can't show it to anyone because he has them all convinced that I was the crazy one. I'll just look like a vindictive ex. I will never convince anyone of this because he's so good at hiding it. He only treats his partners like this. Nobody else sees it. He'll do this to another girl and because he's still deeply ingrained into my social circle, I'll have to just sit there and watch it happen, or someone will just fucking casually tell me about it because they don't give a fuck about my feelings. I don't have any power to stop this and I wish I had the courage to just kill myself already. I can't bear to live in a world where men like this are allowed to get away with their behavior without repercussion.

No. 624771

My boyfriend is maybe going to be homeless and it's killing me.

He's not from my part of the country and used to live at my parents a few months until we both moved in, and basically our housing situation was horrible and he was in a very bad streak mentally, couldn't take it anymore and we broke up and I moved back at my parents.

We ended up back together after talking a lot more because the break up snapped him out of his way, and now we obviously want to move back in together but he hasn't got a job yet and lives at a friend's apartment, paying him rent.

We don't know how much time it'll take for us to move back in and it's hard for him to live with this friend who is very loud at night and well, we don't know how long that friend will want him there.

My step father doesn't want him in the house again, which is fair enough but then the other option is for him to live in his car which terrifies me.

I'm doing the best I can to find something, and it's hard because students took over most of the apartments, but this is constantly over my head and it's stressing me out so much.

Please tell me it'll be fine nonnie.

No. 624800

"hi anon, i value the time we spent together but i've started seeing someone seriously."

"ok cool, hope it works out for you. good luck."

half hour later:

"i shouldn't have texted you, thinking about how good your mouth is :)"

i feel half blessed that it took this long for scrote shit to come out so i can just block the number and move on, and, as a plus, makes this person being gone feel 1000% less shitty.

No. 624801

File: 1599510989847.jpg (44.06 KB, 940x481, side-effects-movie.jpg)

So I alienated my only friend. She told me that because I'm unreliable and disappear from time to time she feels she cannot trust me and she doesn't see me on her 'top 3 friends list anymore'. She was the best friend I've ever had. I just realized it now that this is a pattern in my relationships, where I basically force people to abandon me. They get too close, I feel uncomfortable, pull away, they get weirded out and back out. I know this comes from my relationship with my mom - she abandoned me emotionally and now I have this compulsion to repeat this infinitely. I've always been socially awkward and I see no hope of finding new friends or let alone a romantic relationship.
I don't know what to do. I hate intimacy but I also hate being without it. I feel like I never learned how to fucking relate to people and it's too late to learn it in my fucking 20s. I just want someone to hold me. I feel so worthless. How the fuck do I change

No. 624807

This probably goes without saying here on lc but I'm going to say it anyway: Anons, don't ever let any piece of shit scrote (particularly white scrotes) try and convince you that they're a victim of society, or women, or what-have you. Literally the worst thing the average white guy has ever gone through is having one or both parents who didn't meet their emotional needs in the exact way that they needed them to. It does not justify their rampant abuse and exploitation of women. It does not justify misogyny. Please do not hesitate to tell any scrote who tries to use you for emotional labor to get fucked and pay for an actual therapist if they truly feel so victimized and pathetic. These retards will externalize their problems onto everyone and everything except themselves. They expect the whole world, particularly women, to cater to and coddle them. Don't buy into their bullshit.

No. 624815

>>624801
Hey, I can relate. I lost several friendships in my late teens and through to my middle 20s because of similarly frivolous and unreliable behaviours. I'm in my late 20s now and I've improved a lot, but learning how to support your loved ones is a work in progress without a point of completion. Consider that every day is another opportunity to make better decisions. You have your whole life ahead of you to learn from your mistakes. In my experience, practicing mindfulness activités such as CBT were critical to managing my own social behaviour. I can't afford to see a therapist but there are a lot of resources online. I also like refer back to a book called the Body Keeps the Score which describes the neuroscience behind ptsd and how to develop healthy coping mechanisms. Please don't lose hopr anon, I believe in your capacity to make a change for the better.

No. 624821

>>624801
>They get too close, I feel uncomfortable, pull away, they get weirded out and back out. I know this comes from my relationship with my mom - she abandoned me emotionally and now I have this compulsion to repeat this infinitely.
Have you ever told any of your friends this? Do you feel like they would be able to deal with your need for distance? It's actually pretty common for people with abandonment trauma to attract each other, which unfortunately ends up being a disaster because one person's needs are unintentionally triggering the other's. Often what happens is that one person with abandonment trauma will disconnect and distance to avoid pain, while the other will get really clingy and insist on more closeness.

Best course of action is to make friends with people who are emotionally stable and have a good support system as is, and don't need you to constantly be there for them emotionally. Try and familiarize yourself with red flags that indicate a person has abandonment trauma that they haven't healed from. These types of relationships are going to be too much work for both of you to deal with.

At the same time, you need to be willing to at least communicate in some way that you're uncomfortable getting too close to people. That way, people won't be so puzzled by the behavior and think that you don't want to be around them. If you don't feel comfortable doing so, that's probably a sign that the person isn't a good choice as a friend.

No. 624830

File: 1599513414630.jpg (27.68 KB, 400x290, 1572838705039.jpg)

No idea if that counts as a vent but whatever. I was suddenly wondering right now why I was secretly following a guy I knew from university on twitter for some time before deleting my account a few months ago, because it's been a while since I did it. I remember that he managed to get a nice comfortable job thanks to a friend and complete, sheer luck and his company was looking for an intern. I needed that internship asap to graduate and since he talked about it on fb I sent him my resume and asked for info. He then said way later once I came back to him and asked for news that because, according to his manager, I didn't have the right degree (even though I had the exact same one except it's a master's instead of just a bachelor's so it's even more valuable in general and actually made me actually qualified to work in this field, unlike him) and I don't have experience yet (even though an internship is meant to be a first experience AND he got the actual job as opposed to just an internship despite having no exp whatsoever in that field anyway) the manager wasn't interested in my application and looked for someone else.

Before that, I found his twitter by coincidence, a fb friend/mutual/whatever also from university advertised his twitter for his small company he just created and I noticed they followed each other because the guy had a selfie as his icon. If the guy didn't have his selfies all over his twitter I wouldn't have recognized him at all. I was curious and went back to both these guys' accounts at some point because I had way too much time to waste from not being able to graduate on time because I had no internship and the guy was bragging about how he, and not his manager, was recruiting the intern he had to train and he made sure to specifically look for guys, and he hired a guy just because he found him hot. He spent the next 6 months complaining about the intern being an incompetent idiot who only caused problems and slowed everyone down but it was ok because he was supposedly really hot. I guess I was so mad after seeing that that I started following him later so I could know more about the situation and he was sometimes posting confidential info about other employees and forgot to blur out some parts of some documents like full names or the company's address and name and I regret not archiving that shit just in case I could use it against him. I'm dumb. Anyway, the morale of this story is, never trust male feminist, even the 100% gay ones. I can't believe the guy actually used to be so nice irl and brag about being a feminist and standing up for his "sisters" and would do something that fucked up, I thought he would just stick to trying to make me his fag hag for being a tomboyish """sassy""" ethnic minority while shitting on my other tomboyish friends for not wearing makeup. He started following me soon after I did and he was always trying so hard to joke with me and be nice me despite me ignoring him most of the time because he had no clue who I was online. I also found his tumblr in which he was shit talking many people from university like a two-faced little bitch as well, and over things where he was worse than the vast majority of us.

Speaking of, his friend I found on twitter first was also an arrogant piece of shit and I wish he never deleted his twitter because I wanted to see how and why exactly his company failed. Dude was spending his time being so condescending and treating people like idiots for no reason (except me, he was just avoiding me while shit talking and making fun of my friends) and I was a bit happy to his life project crash and burn out of nowhere.

No. 624833

>>624830
Oops, sorry it's so long. tldr; I was spying on a guy I knew from university after I found out he discriminated against me and other candidates for an internship at his company because he wanted to have a sexy male intern/assistant and "secretly" bragged about it on social media and it made me super salty.

No. 624835


No. 624838

I’m tired all the time. From the moment I wake up it’s just exhaustion and so don’t know what to do about it. It’s so fucking as lying because I want to get things done but I can’t because I feel like I’m dying all the time.

No. 624853

>>624838
have u been to dr anon?
I have severe fatigue from hashimotos disease and everyone just thought I was making it up (“lazy”) until I got diagnosed. hope u feel better soon.

No. 624876

You fucking stupid retarded literally autistic bitch

you will never get a job and never succeed because you have fucking potato worms for brains and I honest to God hope you get some help but you're such a fucking coward that you will likely never

I hope you don't expect a lick of money from me. You aren't eating my food or touching my shit, you're not gonna have a motherfucking say in anything ever so don't expect that

No. 624878

>>624876
Who is this about

No. 624879

>>624853
Thanks anon, I know I really should call but I always put off making appointments bc doctors have been useless in my experience. Gonna call them tomorrow morning to make an appointment, hopefully they can figure it out.

No. 624880

>>624876
Be the change you want to see in the world anon

No. 624881

File: 1599517038195.gif (566.57 KB, 295x207, 1515562508873.gif)

when i came to clock in this morning, my coworker wasn't wearing a mask and i freaked out and asked her to please put one on. she got paggro with me , so i waited for our boss. When he got there, he had to have a talk with her about safety and policies. finally, when i had to clock in to work with her, she gave me stank attitude all day, so they just called the person in whose shift i was taking without notifying me.
Now she's pissed off at me, acting like i planned this entire thing like some plot to ruin her day. what the fuck. now she's being passive aggressive af

No. 624882

>>624838
Could be anemia too! When you go to see a doctor you'll definitely have to get your blood tested and then you'll know. I get that tiredness every time my iron levels fall too low, takes about 2 weeks of supplimenting to fix it, v easy and I hope it will be just as easy for you

No. 624888

Bitch if you have a problem with me, fucking contact me. Don't do this petty shit, because I know damn well who you are.

No. 624893

>>624878
My retarded troon friend, she wouldn't be caught dead here

it would give her "too much anxiety" and she worships certain cows here

No. 624896

>>624888
You sound paranoid and insane.

No. 624902

Anyone else full-body shudder whenever someone you don’t like at all and don’t want anywhere near you at any capacity say they miss you? Like die please.

No. 624908

I've started being super nitpicky with people who are nitpicky with me. Like bitch we are supposed to like each other! I could easily call you out on dumb and annoying shit all the time but the good outweighs the bad and I don't want to make you feel bad. Maybe it's just me. I know I'm easy target for people's passive aggressive behavior because I hate confrontation and generally let stuff roll off my back. I really need to stand up for myself more. The most I've done is said something like "you don't always need to be so critical" in a casual manner. But whatever I don't even want to have relationships with these people anymore I just want to be mean to them a little first.

No. 624910

I was on Twitter and saw a man shoot himself in the head with a shotgun. I feel fucking sick and furious.
I can't believe there are people out there who take the time to edit cute animal clips in before gore. Like….. why?

No. 624912

Dear god nonnies, I feel like I really fucked it this time.

I'm a music major, first of all. And typically, it's considered poor taste to date someone who plays the same instrument as you because you have to be around them for a while. Guess what I did? Fell for the top-performing guy in my studio. Fell for him a year ago, actually. To cope I tried pushing him away and actively not talking or being nice to him and I definitely dated another guy just to get my mind off of it. But here we are and that other guy ghosted me out of nowhere. My feelings come back full force, as they do.

I dropped a couple of hints and then finally got coffee with him. We chatted for a few hours and it was great! Wonderful! But then when he said he needed to drive me back to my apartment I fucked up. I slammed the car door and blurted out that I had liked him for a long while but I knew the circumstances were terrible but maybe he would want to be more than friends anyways? He told me that yeah, the circumstances were godawful but he actually liked me back. We talked for a little bit about this new precarious situation, about how we can't do anything necessarily but wouldn't it be nice? Maybe it's just my BPDfag ass talking, but he said he didn't want to break my heart when he graduated next semester and I melted a little. So we came to a sort-of conclusion that we would keep talking and hanging out and, I'm quoting him, "if something happens, then it happens". And so I swooped in and asked if I could kiss him and Christ! He's really fucking good at that and I wasn't expecting it! So I'm like double-fucked.

That was three days ago, and he's been not necessarily ignoring me, but definitely waiting a while to reply to me. The worst. And like, that's not even what's upsetting. It's the fact that if the circumstances had been any different, we would be what I want. Here I am, with a guy that actually likes me back and is available, but I can't have him because of the circumstances that brought us together in the first place.

I'm a dumbass and I'm working myself into a tizzy trying to make sense of everything and I wish someone could just slap some sense into me. It's like Plato's allegory of the cave up in this bitch. Hopefully this was coherent, I'm really intoxicated right now and I wanted to cry at someone who wouldn't judge me because "it would never work out!"

No. 624913

File: 1599519687418.png (257.77 KB, 500x375, 1593927948706.png)

I realized that I very likely have ADHD and I'm trying to get a diagnosis for it. I don't have a family doctor so I had to get referred to a GP by a walk-in clinic. I was told that the GP would contact me within the next 10 days, and if I didn't hear from the GP, to call the walk-in clinic again for another referral. Suffice to say the GP never did call me. I understand they are incredibly busy, but it's proving to be a pain in the fucking ass to get the ball rolling towards diagnosis, which is made worse by the fact that I'm going back to school tomorrow after a 4 years long hiatus. I had to drop out because of mental burnout, I couldn't be arsed to complete a single deadline, it felt horrible. I don't want to be in that position again. I fucking hate how complicated it is to seek help. I just want to reee into oblivion.

No. 624917

>>624910
And here is my disgusting ass trying to find it

No. 624918

>>624913
If you're a UK anon idk if this would apply to you but they sometimes have to be extra skeptical with people seeking an ADHD diagnosis. It's because of the easily abused meds of course.
Sorry you have to go through this but don't let it drop.

No. 624920

>>624917
Don’t worry. I have morbid curiosity too kek

No. 624921

File: 1599520051591.jpeg (154.92 KB, 750x1000, 636BE582-34B9-4D20-8617-13FFB9…)

>>624902
I usually solve that like pic related.

No. 624923

>>624921
Oh I just meant like they proclaim it in some setting you aren’t involved in and then you see it by accident/ are told about it later. Abhorrent.

No. 624924

>>624917
ME TOO BITCH i know it'll make me sad but I just wanna seeee

No. 624925

>>624920
Same, anon. Same. If you ever want some real dark shit (that won't get you on the fbi most wanted list for looking at) go on r/crimescene on reddit. Yes I know, ew reddit booo incels whatever- this is the only subreddit worth looking at. It won't let you down.

No. 624926

>>624913
I'm really sorry anon, as a person who also has ADHD my diagnosis was more like a battle. I hope you get to speak to a doctor soon

No. 624928

>>624924
Like it won't make me happy but I do enjoy being reminded of how fragile my meat cage of a body is

No. 624931

>>624912
> typically, it's considered poor taste to date someone who plays the same instrument as you
what kind of ridiculous rom-com reasoning is that?

I'm happy for you that you got a good kiss from a guy you like but to be completely honest if he really liked you and wanted to be with you, he would, graduation or not. So don't get too attached to the idea.

No. 624932

>>624928
Found it on hoodsite. Damn, his head's just gone. I feel bad for the little dog walking into frame at the end. It looks scared and confused.

No. 624935

Why the fuck do people say that life gets better in your thirties? I'm not there just yet but I just don't get it. I want to understand, I want to be happy, it just neither makes any logical sense to me nor is it experientally true for me in any possible way. Each passing year is worse and worse.

I'm lonelier than ever - it's ridiculously difficult to make friends as an adult compared to in your teens, you don't have the same diverse, structured social lifestyle that comes with being in high school / university etc. Most people are exhausted from their jobs and don't really have the energy to be social anymore. The little they have left they spend on their family usually. I have no interest whatsoever in procreation, raising children or being around them, and that feels alienating. I just Do Not Get It.

I do things on my own but I've been doing the same things on my own for 10 years now. This isn't something I'm able to do now that I wasn't before. On the contrary, I had a lot more spare time before I had a full time job. Sure, I have money, but I find it meaningless past a certain point which really isn't that far up. I was happier when I was relatively poor but I had spare time and people to do things with. What can money buy to make me happier, on my own, past the basic comforts of life? Experiences? Experiences are fun when shared. I had memorable experiences with friends on a shoestring budget in my early 20s. Experience what on my own now? Alcoholism? I have a relative surplus of money and cannot think of anything to spend it on that could add value to my life at this point.

I just fucking hate being so lonely. I wish either I was like most people, able to be content somehow with what they are content with, or that more people were like me and we could do things together. Before anyone jumps down my throat because it's apparently a Controversial Opinion nowadays to say you get lonely on your own eventually, I do things on my own and have done so for a long enough time, it just does get repetitive after a while.

My health is shittier, I have to watch what I eat now lest I feel gross most of the time, I need to sleep more, my face is starting to wrinkle, I get random pains I didn't have before.

The grind of the capitalist workplace has removed any hopes and dreams I once had of doing something fulfilling and meaningful. I had hopes and dreams in my teenage years and early 20s, now I barely do anymore. Just some sort of childlike innocence I guess that is now gone. The great things I wanted to be part of as an adult don't even seem to exist in real life. Everything is just a massive disappointment. And that's the thing. I'm not jealous of anyone around me. I don't really have any major regrets. I don't think I have it worse off than most people. I'm aware I don't. I'm sure any number of things feel fulfilling to different individuals but I, personally, can not see myself happy doing any of those things.

And it's not even like I had an amazing young adulthood. It's truly not about that. I wasn't ever popular or outstandingly succesful at anything and I was extremely self conscious. There were periods of fun though and of feeling like there's some purpose to it all.

Now there's just no light at the end of any tunnel in any direction. Life feels like a merciless meat grinder. The walls are closing in more and more each year. And the only way we can go is forward, into the endless claustrophobic void.

I just don't get it. I want to get it. I want to get it so badly. I just absolutely cannot empathize at all with enjoying anything about this life period (and probably any of the ones that follow it as well). What the hell am I meant to do for another 30+ years of this? Literally how exactly could it ever get better?

I can afford matching furniture and to turn my heating on more during winter, as I rot indoors doing nothing of any value to anyone including myself every day for the 4th year in a row. What a great, fulfilling adult life. I don't even fucking want matching furniture anymore. Who gives a fucking crap. I literally haven't experienced the feeling of fun in years.

Fuck I know this sounds awfully self complacent but I need to let it out. I just miss simpler times and the luxury of shared spontaneity with friends. I wish anyone else around me wanted to experience the same things I want to experience.

No. 624936

>>624931
It's just a thing. Sounds like rom-com reasoning but I don't know anyone who dated within their studio.

I guess you're right, but he's getting his master's in Nebraska or some shit while I'm stuck in Not Nebraska.

No. 624937

>>624932
Ohhh fuck there's a dog? I hope someone took the doggie in, this is why the fuck you need to prepare before offing yourself, fucking scrotes.

No. 624939

>>624937
I can't imagine ever offing myself in front of my dogs. They're sensitive to my emotional breakdowns, so I make sure to leave the house/get our of sight for that shit, so blowing my brains out in front of them would truly terrify them.

No. 624940

>>624935
I would say start hanging out with younger people. I know it sounds creepy but most older people just arent easy to make friends with.

No. 624946

I'm really lazy and introverted and I can't seem to change this no matter what. Im surprised I haven't failed out of uni. Surprisingly I still manage to scrape by with Bs. No matter what, I can't seem to motivate myself. Habits don't stick, bullet journals seem dumb, stoicism is hard. Im so fucking lazy I can't stand it. I feel like shinji when he is supposed to get in the eva but can't do it. I don't know what to do. Im too lazy to even try to find something that works. I just do bare minimum to keep myself alive and afloat. Fear is the only thing that can nudge me into action. I just don't understand how everyone else seems to fling themselves into action consistently. I guess all I can do is learn to accept that this is a part of my character and move on. But it makes me feel ashamed and disappointed in myself.

No. 624947

Being cheated on sucks, but some people take their victim complex over it way too fucking far. I opened up to a friend about my ex who violently attacked me several times and she said "I totally know how you feel, I was in an abusive relationship too. He never hit me, but he cheated on me."

Like seriously, fuck you for thinking getting cheated on is comparable to being beaten by your boyfriend.

No. 624948

i spent an hour memorizing a presentation for a zoom class, pulled up my notes as a safety thing and still got so nervous i ended up reading them and people noticed i want to kms

No. 624949

>>624948
i swear mr. teacher man i'm not a lazy pos i'm just insane

No. 624951

>>624947
She was insensitive making this comparison but so are you.

No. 624953

>>624947
People who cheat in relationships tend to be abusive too, to be fair.

No. 624955

>>624440
I’m fairly sure it wasn’t, I get a lot of random insecure dudes following/DMing me on snapchat because I have a (very modest) following from doing some goth modelling on insta. I get a bunch every day calling me an ugly bitch etc and I can brush that off, but this is the first time where someone’s called me fat and I felt like they had a point. But I know he’s probably only saying it because he’s insecure himself and is trying to neg me. I’m trying to be nice to myself. My body needs food and I deserve to be healthy. Thanks anon :)

No. 624959

Elderly dog anon back again. Confronted my mom twice today about the dog’s quality of life. She said, “Her time is coming. She’s my dog, I’m not putting her down”
Does she want her to really fucking suffer before she dies? I told her I can’t keep ignoring something like this. I’m hoping my persistence will make her understand but so far nothing.
She woke me up at 4 am this morning to help her down the stairs outside. She was so weak, it was a struggle, and I’m sure we caused her some pain in the process.
I’m fucking angry.
I think I’ve gone and upset her now, but I really don’t fucking care. Losing a dog isn’t supposed to be easy, making this decision isn’t supposed to be easy. But you do it because there’s no point in prolonging suffering. Quality of quantity.

No. 624964

>>624940
I have in the past, I don't mind that as long as it's not… teenagers. Sure there's a disconnect on some level but there's even more of a disconnect with people my own age sometimes.

The issue is that I also live in a shithole country where nothing ever happens. Making friends in general isn't easy here. I'm pretty sure the issues I'm having would be less pronounced in a slightly more… Diverse, modern place. There literally are no active communities for my true interests here. Guess it's up to me to get something going. Fuck it.
If nothing works out by the time I turn 30 I'm beginning to seriously consider hauling ass across the globe and starting over somewhere less… medieval.

No. 624967

My foot always hurts in different places after I‘ve been exercising (running, dancing, elliptical). My doctor just told me to wear wider and better fitting shoes, but I have no idea where to get shoes that don‘t make my feet hurt, all shoes seem to do that for these past couple of years. I don‘t want to fuck up my feet and end up getting injured during a workout… I guess I need to go to some kind of a specialist?

No. 624970

>>624967
Go to specialist and have insoles fitted, helps a lot with a lot of things from feet to back issues.

No. 624983

File: 1599527998338.jpg (8.26 KB, 236x229, 41781c483c8b2d0a56feaa0bc4bd68…)

Im still very affected by my abusive relationship from 2 years, i never really got therapy because im really low on money for therapy sessions. I get frequent dreams of him, it is mostly my family being killed and myself since he threatened that once and it still fucking scares me a lot even tho i will never fucking see him ever again.

I just hate getting random depressive episodes, panic attacks and night terrors. I just fucking hate myself for not leaving him sooner, i could have prevented myself from getting hurt. Even my close friends told me to leave him, they were right there was some red flags but i was so delusional.

I really love my friends for warning me and telling me to break up with him, even if i broke it off later. I still have major respect for them. I just wish i wasnt so selfish and blind.

Also, i just realized that my ex abuser is a pedophile. He was 2 years older than me, i was 17. He made me sent explicit pictures and im really disgusted of myself, i still have his address and such but im not sure if he still lives there or lives at all (he suicide baited alot too). He still probably has those explicit pics of me when i was still considered a child, i could report him for possesing child porn.

but im not sure if i can even do that…im just too fucking scared of him.

i know im a coward, i really am.

No. 624990

>>624983
I'm sorry anon. I posted about my abusive relationship further up in the thread. It ended 3 years ago and I still get exactly what you described here. Depressive episodes, anxiety, attacks of paranoia. More so than anything I'm just really fucking angry. That being said, I feel like these attacks are happening further and further apart, and it's easier for me to come back down from them. It takes time to heal, but it does get better. Have you looked into low cost therapy centers in your area? They offer payment on a sliding scale since their therapists are all still in training and aren't licensed yet. I've had pretty good luck with my center and I only pay $5 per session.

No. 625007

Damn , I'm such a bitch to my parents because they are and have been completely emotionally unavailable my whole life and I'm a hot mess bc of it , but I live under their roof and that's really been helping me considering my job pays shit despite having a uni degree and a teaching license. It's the norm for kids to stay in their parent's house in my culture, but technically they could tell me to piss off. I need to be nicer to them .

No. 625011

My dad is a fucking retard. Like, he's not outright abusive or anything, but he genuinely has no idea how to be supportive and just says ridiculously inappropriate things if I open up to him about any struggles. Like even if I directly link an emotional problem to an actual ongoing issue in my life, like my shitty job or my abusive ex-friend, he'll start playing arm chair psychologist with me and tell me he thinks I have undiagnosed Bipolar Disorder or something. Ffs he had the audacity to suggest that he thought I had BPD because one of his friend's daughters is diagnosed with BPD and "remind him of her sometimes." The fuck?????

No. 625028

File: 1599534108961.jpg (59.7 KB, 650x650, 1DerExjN60.jpg)

I'm finally cute on top of having some skills, but most women I see irl and on dating apps (I'm a grimy bisexual) are also very cute and have cool skills.
How could anyone ever love me if there are so many options? This conundrum finally hit me after all the weight loss and bullshit. Being attractive isn't anything special because it is the expected baseline.

How can I ever deal with feeling so replaceable?
I just want to be married but people and their feelings are so confusing to me because I'm socially rarted.

No. 625029

>>625028
it's okay, you can't even find women on dating apps bc it's all couples.

No. 625030

>>624918
>>624926
I appreciate your responses. After contacting the clinic I read a few testimonies of women who sought diagnosis as adults, and they all mentioned how challenging it was for the reasons you mentioned. At the same time, I can't help but find it cruelly ironic that receiving treatment for a disorder which impairs time management and organizational abilities requires so much bureaucratic hoop-jumping. I am going to continue pursuing it, even if I have to take a bit of a financial hit in paying for a psychiatric examination

No. 625077

File: 1599543869976.jpeg (20.77 KB, 275x206, CC4D020B-4AC0-438E-911E-081B45…)

It’s just now clicking in my brain that I accidentally found cp on google images when I was a child. jesus christ

No. 625092

Overly edgy adult people who say shit like "I wish the whole humanity was wiped out, WE'RE the real monsters!!!!1111" make me cringe so bad I want to curl up in a ball. You're not in 7th grade anymore you idiot, there's no need to try to shock your parents and teachers.

No. 625093

>>624935
Let me guess, you're 24-26 so "almost in your thirties" and you're already decided on that your life is shit and will be shit even when you're still not there. Because you sound like you're in your late teens.

Seriously the people in their mid 20's trying to pass themselves as being 30+ and then bitching about how they were lied about the 30's being better and how they're still miserable are becoming a meme over here.

No. 625094

>>625077
same. post-rape CP on 4chan. i must've been 12. i vaguely remember the picture but i tried really hard to forget it.

No. 625101

>>625092
I agree omg. I feel like it was still cringeworthy even in 7th grade but hearing it completely sincerely from grown adults it’s so embarrassing.

No. 625104

I’m truly the most awkward and embarrassing person that has ever lived. I’m literally too socially inept to even just log into a minecraft server because I hate when it says ‘anon joined’ and then everyone says ‘wb’ like even that makes me feel so embarrassed and anxious and seen.

No. 625112

>>625104
I know what you mean. I've avoided online games my entire life because of this.

No. 625150

>be me
>25, bf 30. Been together 3 years by now.
>has a standard job but mostly wants to get married and settle down, have children, in the next few years. Ideally before I hit 30.
>bf doesn't want children so soon, says further in the future but rn wants to enjoy his life with me and focus on career.
>fair enough
>few years later I start getting into my career too and it fucking takes off
>accomplish more than I ever thought, currently gearing myself toward a top level position at my company that would pay big bucks and is super exciting
>bf now wants to start a family
>tell him I want children one day too but rn I'm also focused on my career
>continuous fights start happening over it, about how he's worried he won't have kids until he's 40 now
>still happening, thinking we need to split

Iunno, I've been with him for so long it's impossible to imagine. The time we were spending together, travelling and doing new things, was amazing. I do want to be a mum but, now I'm thinking in my mid 30s. I don't want to halt the trajectory of my career now. Why do men think they get to make all the timely decisions. I didn't pressure him in anyway when I wanted kids 4 years ago fuuuuck

No. 625159

>>625150
oof that’s a tough one. You said it urself that u want a family and now ur partners finally onboard. Maybe the career climb would make u a better provider for your family, but maybe ur partner would shoulder more breadwinner responsibility bc they rather u focus on cultivating the kids. Put it all out on the table and look at the bigger picture

No. 625162

Why is everyone so mean just.be.nice. I just called the doctor and she went off on me so hard for no reason even though the problem was her fault.

No. 625170

asexuality is fucking annoying to deal with and the only people who are proud of it are autists trying to cope online because they can't have relationships offline. fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No. 625175

>>624673
Why the fuck is your mom angry at your tits?

No. 625176

>>624710
Do you have dirty laundry he could access?

No. 625180

>>625175
I have no idea why they make her so angry, she hates that they are kind of big and kinda saggy because 'girls your age have firm perky tits and yours are so floppy and gross anon and it is all your fault!'. She feels disgust at them and I wear tight bras so they aren't as visible. Because of her, I kinda hate them too now, I dropped a lot of weight in hopes they'd become smaller but they remained the same. She points them out in every clothing I wear to say they look awful

No. 625183

>>625180
Wtf?? There is nothing wrong with your titties and everything wrong with your mom

No. 625187

>>625183
I try not to let it get to me anon, but it's tough

No. 625190

I should have fucking told someone what was going on when I was younger, but I didn't and now I'm paying the price.

No. 625195

Does anyone here have trouble deciding on which hobbies they've wanted to pursue? I don't feel like I can keep track of them

I've dabbled in various hobbies over the past couple of years from makeup to fashion to Magic. I've never managed to keep at anything for an extended period of time because my life gets too busy and I lose track of things.

I moved back in with my family this summer because of COVID and they moved. Seeing all of my shit together and wondering where all the stuff I can't find really puts into perspective how much stuff I've accumulated trying to pursue my hobbies. But now I feel so overwhelmed I don't know where to start in sorting through my stuff and actually using it. For example, I have a ton of alt fashion clothes but I can't decide what to wear so I just end up wearing my normie clothes all of the time instead.

Part of me feels like giving everything away and just starting over with a minimalist lifestyle instead. I wouldn't do that because I know I'll just start accumulating things again. And I just can't figure out what to do so I end up gaming for hours a day. Ugh.

No. 625198

>>625180
Your mom is a fucking nutcase. Don't take her shit!

No. 625200

>>625180
Your mum sounds like a jealous narc. Sorry if I'm overstepping the boundaries but wtf is her problem?

No. 625207

>>625180
Women have all sorts of shaped tits even in our early twenties. Grown women really shouldn't be shocked by that fact?? or offended at the sight of them.

The issue is obviously her and I hope you learn to feel better in your body down the line. Tempting as it is to tell you to stand up to her and call her out on her BS.. I know how hard that is with parents. Being both braless and in old pjs 16 hours a day somedays .. is one of my fave parts of living alone. I have memories of my dad screaming at me to get out of my pjs a day after surgery. Hate that shit at home.

No. 625209

>>624673
Your ma sounds jealous of your big beautiful boobs anon. Try not to internalise what she says always have your counter narrative in your head. I hope when you get out you can be comfortable in your own skin.

No. 625253

File: 1599574267209.jpg (116.86 KB, 1024x860, ad92ad1fdf81003711dc0ebfa3476b…)

>>625198
>>625200
>>625207
>>625209
You ladies are so nice, thank you!! I hope I can let my boobs be free one day

No. 625259

Fds is really right about never helping men. I have a fwb who is really mentally ill like it's not even a joke. He disappeared for a while and then came back and said "sorry I was just focusing on myself". The fact that he was focusing on himself really dawned on me that he couldnt give two shits about me, he never asks how I'm doing or about my mental health. He came back and all he has to say is "I was focusing on myself" no "how have you been?"…I noticed he never asks how I've been. Men do nothing that doesnt benefit them, so I proceeded to block him with no guilt. He did try to guilt me with his mental illness excuse but tbh I didnt even give a shit. I see why some bitchy women just tell men to "man up" when they come to them with their problems.

No. 625267

>>625259
I'm noticing a similar thing with the guy I'm dating (not fwb). I really like him, but I am always asking him how he's doing, what he's up to, how work is going, about his interests etc, and he barely shows me the same interest. Like fuck, I'm not a boring person! Ask me about myself you fucking idiot.

No. 625270

>>625267
In most relationships I've been in the men would have had no idea what was going on in my life if I had not told them. Is it really hard to ask "how have you been?"….

No. 625274

>>625259
>>625267
>>625270
where tf do you find these people? even when i could tell the guy was trying to use me, they made some kind of effort to be interested in me.

No. 625275

>>625150
Idk anon somethink irks me about him wanting kids right now when you're thriving. I don't want to be that crazy bitch who tells you to dump him but please be wary. It kinda sounds like he wants to trap you.

No. 625278

>>625275
it sounds more like he is worried about being too old with kids to me.

No. 625279

>>625170
Omg the worst is when there's any media or post that celebrates sex or a sexually attractive person and some rando comments "As an asexual, can't relate" just for clout. Like literally shut up kek

No. 625281

>>625170
Who hurt you, anon? There's nothing wrong with being asexual. I'm guessing people you know are just being obnoxious about it?

No. 625282

>>625259
I'll agree that men are socialized to be more selfish in general, but mentally ill people being self-centered cunts is absolutely a problem for both genders. Maybe in different ways.
Most mentally ill men I've ever encountered acted precisely in the way you described. They check out/check in whenever they please, believing that mental unwellness gives them the right to behave however they see fit, and if anyone has a problem with how they are treated by them then they can turn it around and make others the bad guys because their mental conditions are like the perfect excuse to avoid all accountability. It used to upset me, but now I'm kind of glad that these types of weak men effectively weed themselves out of social circles leaving only the most doormat, beta people who will blame themselves while taking their abuses.
Anyone with a bit of backbone or self-respect won't handle more than a few interactions out of basic human decency and no more after that.

No. 625283

>>625259
I just had a guy do the same thing except he isnt fwb just a guy I've known a few years. The only difference is he does ask how I am, but still seems to use me as a call-therapist. Guy has enough money to pay for all the therapists, pills, counseling he wants. My life was going straight down the drain when he ghosted for 'his mental health' but I wasn't even using him as a therapist. If it continues I'll have to block him everywhere. Thanks for posting this view point anon
>>625274
Shit you're right too anon…

No. 625284

>>625278
Have you two discussed freezing sperm? Not sure frozen is better quality but at least it would be young.

No. 625308

>>625281
i was venting about actually being asexual rather than interacting with asexuals. being proud of it is just cope. and no amount of asexual awareness is going to convince people to give up on sex to date an asexual autist. i wish i could go back to being aromantic.

No. 625320

>>625308
I wish you would fuck off to tumblr.(Infighting )

No. 625323

>>625308
Oh I see, I'm sorry I misunderstood you. I know that it's harder to find a relationship because the majority of people are not asexual, but I hope you know that it's possible to find someone who's compatible with you, and most importantly come to peace with yourself and the way that you are. There's nothing wrong with being asexual and there are people out there who would date you, they are just harder to find.

No. 625327

>>625323
stop. don't engage with genderspecials.

No. 625334

I wish this really sweet and attractive girl I've known for years would just leave "sex work" aka camming and sugar babying already because she writes a negative status about it seemingly every day. It's obvious she hates it aside from keeping her out of low paid traditional employment.
She's constantly complaining about scrotes. Constantly complaining that people don't take her seriously. Constantly complaining that no one pays her for her time (because she's made herself into such a commodity that she doesn't want anything to do with others unless they're established sex workers who will boost her).

She just seems so miserable and unhappy with it aside from a few trinkets she buys which she could afford with a normal job had she put the past few years working to build her resume instead of sitting on her duff demanding men with small pee pees send her gibs. Jesus.

No. 625339

>>625327
I hate genderspecials as much as the next person but being asexual is considered genderspecial now?

No. 625356

>>625339

Idk it doesn’t really have anything to do with gender.

No. 625358

>>625334
This is the life almost all "sex workers" live. Popular camwhores make it seem like a glamorous profession with money coming in all the time while men worship the ground you walk on, but in reality it's you who's begging men to give you the buck and it's you having to jump through degrading hoops to scrape together maybe $100 tops by selling nudes. Smug e-thots might say "at least I'm not working at mcdonalds" but at the very least you get paid regularly and build up your resume. "Spread pussy for $10 on my onlyfans when I'm not having a mental breakdown on my bathroom floor" isn't exactly a stellar trade skill to have.

No. 625359

Is it more than just laziness if I'm suddenly having trouble completing data entry tasks at my job cause I'd rather browse my phone for hours? Or daydream about doing anything else but this? I have thousands of inputs to complete that I have to focus on for hours, but I've been letting them slack until deadline just because I find it harder to push myself to do it even with music and audio books playing. I feel like such a shit.

No. 625362

>>625359
if it's not some kind of anxiety or sheer dislike of your job, then yes, probably laziness. you might be hyping up how bad it is in your head, we're in a pandemic you need to work to live. you have to start somewhere anon. don't bring your phone to work if it's that bad.

No. 625364

>>625359
It's typical inertia, happens to the best of us, anon. Try to set an extremely easy, simple goal for yourself, like entering just 5 "units" of data. After that, you'll find that you have the energy to do even more just because you're already doing it.

Re: phone addition, if you're on an iPhone, the Downtime feature helps me IMMENSELY.

No. 625394

I'm trying to see a psychiatrist and where I live all the consultations are by phone and every time I give them my new number they keep trying to call my old number they have on file. I literally made an appointment for half an hour after I called and gave them my new number and they still tried to call the old one jesus christ

No. 625406

>>625320
i don't know how any of that sounded tumblr-y, but k.

No. 625428

>>625406
There's one farmer going on tirades lately about how asexuality "isn't real" and that it's simply having a low libido. (Which begs the question, what is the difference, even? A low sex drive is a low sex drive regardless of what it's called. It's sill real.) They were doing the same thing in the last Unpopular Opinions thread.

No. 625430

>>625428
They’re right tho.

No. 625435

Just when I finally decided to get out of my comfort zone and find new friends, the meetup I signed up for got cancelled because of COVID. I'll be forever alone

No. 625504

>>625428
It isn't real.

No. 625507

>>625428
But that's the thing. You experience lack of attraction bc of low libido. It's not a sexuality on its own, if it was then hypersexuality would be too I assume.

No. 625510

>>625430
>>625504
>>625507
Then what would you call their sexual orientation if they have no sexual attraction to either sex? I don't mean simply "no libido," I mean categorizing them into straight, gay or bisexual because you don't believe asexual is the apt description.

No. 625511

>>625510
Questioning lol. Most of them are also a kind of ___romantic so if they fix their libido that would be their sexuality.

No. 625512

>>625507
no libido and low libido aren't the same thing. i have 0 libido. i use the word because it's simply convenient when i'm screaming into the lolcow void.
but using it as an actual sexuality is retarded. if you're straight, stating you're "asexual" is TMI unless you're using the word to describe your situation to a friend, doctor, therapist or whatever.

>>625510
personally i think using general words (straight, gay, lesbian, bi) is more useful. why do people need to know i don't fuck or only fuck on wednesdays? (grey asexuals kek). it's not so much about my sexuality as it is about my general orientation for a partner.
the split attraction model is retarded anyways. got lesbians convincing themselves they're bisexual homoromantic.

No. 625516

Imagine being so attached to your low libido that you label it a "sexuality" and parade it around as something intrinsic to your identity.

No. 625519

>>625511
What about the people who are not romantically attracted to anyone?

No. 625520


No. 625521

Telling someone you're asexual has functionalities outside of talking to your closest associates. It's a sexual orientation because it aptly describes who you're sexually attracted to–no one. If you're asexual and try to use a dating app, chances are a person who does experience sexual attraction is going to get pissed if you wait until they try to initiate to be like "yeah, I'm not attracted to you like that." Most asexual people only really end up with other asexual people anyway (not that there aren't couples made up of asexual and allosexual people). Sure some people have some kind of hormonal imbalance, but that isn't the case for every asexual person.

No. 625523

>>625519
Eventually they grow older than like 13 and that's no longer the case anymore.

No. 625525

>>625519
Mental illness.

No. 625526

>>625521
Nobody cares.

No. 625527

File: 1599593925513.png (207.6 KB, 324x470, 1_HI4kj-TPAQrfQkAdrw2KTA.png)


No. 625529

I've never seen someone seethe this hard over people who don't have sex

No. 625530

Saw my dad for the first time in about a year this weekend. Spent 3 days with him and had multiple moments where I considered slipping my gayness into the conversation gently..didn't happen. I didn't want to ruin his dinner. Didn't want to say it and make the trip awkward.

I am 32 years old and still waiting for the right moment lol

No. 625531

>>625527
Seriously. Ffs imagine using a dating app when you supposedly have no sex drive. Do you really not understand what these are primarily used for?

No. 625533

he never writes me but he is so cute when we go on a date (once a week)
actually he isn’t cute fuck him i do all the planning but I crave human contact

why am I like this

No. 625535

>>625529
This is such low quality bait, c'mon lmao

No. 625536

>>625529
No one cares about asexuals not having sex. The point being made is that choosing not to have sex isn't oppression, it's not interesting and it's not a personality.

No. 625537

File: 1599594285995.gif (141.64 KB, 220x221, isthisabait.gif)

>>625521
>>625531
Chill the hell out and spend your precious time doing something productive, rather than being one big public embarrassment. You really care too much, especially on an imageboard. Arguing on twitter / reddit would make more sense because It'd give you good old karma and whatever.

For a long time now, Tinder and all the POPULAR dating apps has been nothing but thirsty men who want to fuck or taken women who need a threesome.

No. 625538

>>625537
We're both on lolcow, dude. I think we could both use a better hobby. Got any suggestions? I've seen this same discourse twice in the past month and yet anons still find a way to argue about it all over again. Tinder literally has a filter so you can see who's asexual. I'm not sure why so many of you think everyone needs sex to have a good relationship.

No. 625539

>>625521
I'm older than the average userbase here, and we didn't have the term "asexual", so my male best friend just calls himself "impotent".

With that in mind, I'm happy that there's a better, less negative way to call such people than "impotent" for men or "frigid" for women, which were the only labels we had for them until recently.

I don't care if saying "asexual" is ~cringy~ or whatever, at least it's not as needlessly cruel as "frigid/impotent". From a historical perspective, the term "asexual" brought in positive change.

No. 625540

>>625529
>seethe
oh shit, the anon who spergs about asexuality is back.

your bait is stale and your pussy sandy(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)

No. 625543

>>625539
Nta but oldfag here too. You're giving me flashbacks to when I was 11/12 years old and called "frigid" by bullies. I had to ask my mom what it meant. That was an awkward conversation..

No. 625545

>>625540
How'd that post manage to make you angry? What nerve got hit?

No. 625547

File: 1599595611967.jpeg (20.03 KB, 300x262, B8A1CF34-65DA-4B73-83C4-9136D0…)

>>625540
Personally I think we should ignore and change the topic to something less retarded

No. 625550

>>625428
>only one farmer
Keep coping acefaggot

>>625521
>nonexistent sex drive is a sexuality
Jesus christ the stench of twitter is repugnant today, next we'll get underage anons explaining to us how demisexuality is an oppressed social class and needs to be included in LGB(infighting)

No. 625553

File: 1599596101787.jpeg (34.58 KB, 720x480, 9560C494-D09C-4B0D-BC14-D8A6A2…)

>>625550
Hey anon, what’s your fav shampoo brand? Personally I like cheap brands like herbal essence, although I miss the smell of garnier. Jasmine, honey, and rose scents are usually my fav. I’ve also been using hibiscus to tint my hair with a sheen and it’s working out nicely.

No. 625555

File: 1599596394985.jpg (6.14 KB, 275x183, images3f415.jpg)

>>625553
NTA but I was just thinking about buying drugstore shampoo and conditioner today after using Lush bars for like 3 years! How does your hair feel/smell and do you wash your hair often? I have thick Asian hair that I wash every 3 days approximately. I'm always such a slut for the scents, though, they're wonderful. What's your fave genre of smell? I like apple-y.

No. 625557

File: 1599596547216.jpg (127.07 KB, 1024x1024, nothingtoseehere.JPG)

>>625547
>>625553
>>625555
Have any of you tried Mane 'n Tail before? I heard it works wonders. It'll have you growing inches in no time!

No. 625562

File: 1599596707918.jpeg (62.95 KB, 1200x674, 6C2693D6-829B-4CB6-80BC-FBEAE7…)

>>625555
I wish I could use shampoo bars! They never work out for me. I started ~the curly girl method~ awhile ago and I like Hask and Herbal Essences because I think splurging on shampoo constantly is retarded, a lot of shampoos give you a nasty build up or residue. I love apple too! Or the hask coconut line. Anything tropical reminiscent, even tacky smells like Brazilian bum bum.

No. 625564

>>625557
>>625555
>>625553
>>625547
This is the vent thread. Fuck off to the dumbass shit thread with this dumbass shit please

No. 625567

I hate thermodynamics, fuck this shit i'm gonna get an f

No. 625568

>>625564
I think the whole point of this is that the derailing about asexuality needs to wrap it up.

No. 625570

my brother is late to fucking everything and i hate that i let it get to me considering it barely affects me and its his own life he's fucking up. was late to school all the time as a teen, then was 15+ minutes late to his first job almost every day (he had shit management so he never got disciplined for it), then got fired from his next job in a couple months for the same behavior. i can hear him right now getting ready to leave for a job interview, and surprise surprise he's running late. itd be one thing if he was waking up late or having a hard time getting out of bed but hes been up for HOURS.

No. 625571

>catch a redtext ban for infight bc I responded to anon being fucking mean to me
>meanwhile shitposting about asexuality allowed to go unfettered for multiple replies with no redtext ban for a single one of these cunts

Classic lolcow moderation.(>>>meta)

No. 625576

>>625568
It's a vent thread and asexuality is a fucking retarded meme. A lot of people felt the need to vent about it. If you don't like it at least try and change the topic to something vent-worthy. Autistic shampoo brand discussion doesn't bong here you butt boob idiot

No. 625578

I'm so much of a clean freak that I can't even masturbate whenever I feel like it. I go through phases where my desire for penetrative play is quite high and having been single for a while I own a toy for that. Played with it in the bath earlier. Few hours later and I'm horny again but shit like wetness, dripping and having to wash a toy off afterwards.. bothers me a weird amount.

I have all the privacy in the world and I'm still stuck masturbating in the bath.

No. 625579

>>625576
>a lot of people
Lol.

No. 625580

>>625576
Hmm I think we’ve all discovered the autistic one in this situation. It’s you

No. 625590

>>625571
Once I got banned for racebaiting when I stated a neutral, verifiable fact that affects my community and both my countries of origin directly, don't think too much about it lol.

No. 625598

>>625553
>although I miss the smell of garnier
I thought this read "although I miss the smell of gamer" at first, lmao.

No. 625624

My Intro to the Study of language class is fucking preachy and irritating. I just want to know the basics of language formation, not having 5 million discussions on how grammar is classist and racist and other variations. I fucking hate college.

No. 625668

Really upset right now. I was hanging out with a family friend and out of nowhere she mentions my sister and goes "do you think she's autistic?" and it really just pissed me off. My sister is definitely weird and I myself have thought she might have something similar to autism (she was tested when she was younger and was told no) but even so, it's no ones place to openly and verbally speculate what is wrong with her. She's doesn't exhibit any of the symptoms of autism or aspergers because being really reserved and excessive blinking when talking to people, but that could be social anxiety or literally anything else. it just makes me sad for her, I don't want people looking at her in any way besides a normal person deserving of respect. I can't deal with people googling shit and assuming they know what someone has.

No. 625669

>>625668
*besides being reserved

No. 625673

File: 1599606430844.jpg (69.15 KB, 300x300, 2ok8ph.jpg)

my and my sisters's birthdays are close to each other and while my sisters got all kinds of stuff related to their hobbies from my aunt for me she gave 20 dollars and while my sisters have gotten birthday cash from my grandmother for years this was the first time in years i have gotten anything from her and it's still less than what my sisters have gotten

No. 625680

>>625673
Why anon? is there any reason? (not that I can think of a valid one) is she the younger one? More involved one? I feel this though, 100%

No. 625682

>>625680
I'm the middle child, and I don't know it's just always been like this. I mean it's the same with my mother too she gave me 10 dollars and my father still hasn't remembered my birthday but he will when my big sister has her birthday later this week. Same thing happens in christmas too.

No. 625691

>>625668
I'm sorry, anon. I can relate. My brother has a really severe stutter that makes his anxiety pretty bad and I've had people ask me if he was autistic or mentally challenged. It pisses me off when they speculate that shit without knowing him.

No. 625693

>>625682
>>625673

Bruh middle child syndrome is such a curse, it's the reason I refuse to have more than 2 kids if I ever end up having kids lol

Like last year I went to a family member's birthday party and later I got a text from someone "wish you could've made it we missed you <3" like bitch we spoke to each other?

I think middle children are supposed to be the ones who detach a bit from the family and are more fulfilled by relationships with people that we have to form ourselves, sad to say but it's true

No. 625699

>>625668
Autism is a fad diagnosis. It's become the new ADHD and everyone and their mother apparently has it now. Hopefully the craze will burn out within a few years because it's gotten to the point that I just roll my eyes every time someone tells me they think they have autism, or they think a family member has autism, etc. I really only think a small percentage of people qualify for a true autism diagnosis, but armchair fags keep spreading misinformation and trying to extend the diagnosis criteria so that anyone can qualify.

No. 625711

>>625699
My nephews mum likes to tell us he has autism because she'd rather spend her benefits on drugs and partying than potty train her son. Her mother is in social services too and is just as bad if my nephews mothers stories from childhood are to be believed. Although she lies, her own mum seems pretty incompetent in her roles since my nephew is constantly lacking things, even properly sized shoes. Guess him limping is cause he's autistic too

No. 625730

Decided to join my neighbourhood's FB page because I want to support it, and also know what's going on. We have a few politicians in the group itself who are currently in, and boy oh boy is it ever a mess.

Every second post they're bitching about something, and tagging the local politician calling her evil and "can't wait to kick you out" type of shit. They keep bitching about how the bike path is a bad idea, and keep bitching about cyclist. It's so fucking annoying. I joined to see shit happening like festivals and events, not old Italian men complaining about some stupid politicians in full caps.

No. 625750

Man i feel like shit. I hate being pear shaped but not having a clue wht my body really looks like, cause mirrors and selfies suck and my clothes suck. I look like shit in everything i wear. Then i look up pear fashion and its like.. I'm not opposed to it exactly but sometimes i wanna look androgynous and just wear t-shirt and be a cute tomboy kind of look. But I cant cause t-shirts make me look so fuckin wide and like shit. Everything I own makes me look like shit i hate that I cant be like proportional girls who can wear anything. Im not sure how much is in my head cus i got no fucking clue what it truly looks like but I hate my body i feel ugly and wide when i grew up skinny and im not even overweight, just weirdly shaped with shit style and thicc~ thighs (fuck that)

No. 625752

>>625750
samefag anon Im dropping my measurements cus idc, if I trigger anybody by having BDD after all then sorry. But I really think im way to wide and small tits

I'm 5'8, weigh like 139.2lbs if I believe the scale we have (thought I was less it's a big jump from what I used to at the doctor). I measured myself so its probably off but bust- 35.5in without bra. Waist 30 in. Hips like 41in super wide at the thighs. inseam like 29 according to my pants?

Im including that in case any kind anon hasa realistic view of what that looks like, cus I hvae no clue. I know im not fat but it looks really bad in my clothes. I wish i was not wide-hipped. I know i could post in some thread in g about this but i am way too upset to sound neutral and naive

Also if anon thinks thats normal thats great, but it really looks weird to me, if my body turns out to be ok then is it my clothes???? my small head and bad hair?AHHHHH

No. 625756

>>625699
Back in the day doctors would actually refrain from full on diagnosing kids with autism if they were high functioning little weirdos because what good would do slapping a medical label and othering them from other children? Being a “special kid” was not seen as a good thing and living a life as normally as possible was the main goal.

That was the case with me, I genuinely have issues, my mom had a placental abruption at 7 months and i had a handful of developmental issues in childhood, but i was functioning enough that i could socialize with other kids and make friends and didn’t need special attention in school, so the pediatrician thought it was best to leave it at that and not slap a Token Spazz Kid label on me.

Of course I was seeing a therapist on the side to overcome my problems but there was no need to diagnose me with a syndrome and other me from other kids.

No. 625760

>>625756
In your opinion, do you think that was the right decision? How do you think it led you to turn out? You dont have to answer im just curious your view.

Myself I'm particularly annoyed with the current trend (for lack of a better word) because my relative actually has autism, along with another serious disability. He's very low functioning due to both, and when I see people talking about how you should "just listen to disabled/autistic people, it's not something bad, they shouldn't be under someone else's control"– like I generally agree and think that's a good message for many of those people. I listen to him, I don't curse his autism for existing I love him a lot and want for him what makes him safe and happy. But it's not that easy for people like him. My relative is non-verbal, has some harmful behaviors stemming from autism, and if you left him to fend for himself… I can't imagine. I know he's a special case due to his situation, but I've seen people act like low-functioning/non-verbal/etc. autistic people are less important, and brush over that issue. And I feel like that's a result of so many high-functioning cases being in the spotlight, or something

No. 625768

>>625760
Definitely was the right call, school wise I had a very happy childhood even if I wasn’t the most popular kid i felt well loved by my peers and teachers, never was picked on for my weird speech patterns or being kinda wobbly (I didn’t do sports and was prone to falling alot, i had some issues with controlling my legs properly) I personally never felt Different from other people well until I hit my later teens, because tbh all kids are kinda weird and if its a good school where behavioral issues aren’t a problem they won’t single out another kid for being quirky in a different way if the kid can socialize properly, my classmates didn’t care that i spoke weird when we were playing pokemon together or poking anthills with sticks.


Eventually I got bullied really badly on high school but I was just dealt a bad hand in classmates, most of my friends nowadays say their classmates would’ve never allowed something like that to happen in their school, I wish i had received more support during that time and maybe a professional diagnosis in my medical file would’ve made a difference on the school at least making an attempt to ensure my well being because letting people bully a retard is always bad press, they simply abandoned me to the wolves because my bullies were rich and their families donated to the school board.

Autism has a bad rep of being the disease of model spergs in a way, people expect people with autism to be super smart little genius that are oh so quirky and a tiny bit socially awkward, when the reality is that most people with serious autism wont ever fit in society and will need a caretaker who will basically sacrifice their lives to care for the other, and these are the people who need autism resources the most but soccer moms copted out autism because they think their special little boy who throws tantrums, ops sorry, “sensory meltdowns” because she’s too busy drinking is going to be next Sheldon Cooper.

No. 625817

My cat is sick and I'm just.. freaking out. I'm taking her to the vet as soon as it opens which is in 30 minutes. I'm hoping she can hold on that long.
She's an elderly cat so I've been sort of preparing myself mentally for her passing. But I'm not prepared. I don't want her to go. She was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism a little over a week ago and she got medicine for it, her current symptoms match the common side effects of the medicine so I'm hoping she'll be fine if we just stop the meds and try another form of treatment instead. But a part of me is scared that her kidneys or liver is failing.
I've never lost a pet before. I feel so helpless.

No. 625822

>>625817
It's ok anon! I was sure my cat was going to die when he went missing (family member's fault) and came back with a broken jaw, head trauma, and severely underweight. 3 years later he is alive and well and extremely happy and energetic. I was sobbing in the waiting room the day I took him to the vet. The vet even told me to put him down and I said no. Things will be okay!

No. 625839

>>625817
hey anon, im sorry to hear your kitty isnt feeling well!
I had to put my elderly cat to sleep in June. Her name was Zoey, she was 18 years old and even though i knew it was time, it was still so hard. She knew i was there for her, and i think if i were dying, that is all i would ask for too.
You sound like such a caring owner, i am certain your cat knows you love her, and i hope she feels better soon!!

No. 625843

I posted a couple of days ago about my mom being in the hospital. They might be releasing her tomorrow…but its entirely still not sure if she's going to be released or not. Especially since we can't afford the medication she will need for eight weeks. It costs $1k usd for it a week. No insurance and all that. The doctor is gonna see what they can do but I'm still worried everything is gonna go to shit.

No. 625845

My father is such a slimey asshole. I've already been paying my share of utilities and food, but my father now dumped all of his bills that he hasn't been paying for 4 months. I know he's doing this on purpose because he definitely has the money. I asked him to wait because a, I'm saving to move out and b, my current job is most likely to shut down in 2 months. But he doesn't care.
I could move out now but he's blackmailing me with 'you wouldn't want your mom to be without water and electricity'. Just fuck him. Fuck him. If I ever find out I have an incurable disease I'm going to dig my knife deep into his eyesockets and make a necklace out of his intestines.

No. 625848

i have to try to go to canada with my aspergers fiance to look at apartments since his visa has run out. he's canadian and i am from the us. he is here in the us right now and we have to leave in a few days.

No. 625854

>ask fuck buddy his reason for not wanting to send nudes when i asked him for them
>says he thinks taking a pic of his dick is stupid
>offer to send him nudes
>says he doesn’t masturbate a lot
on one hand, he is kind of based for not being a coomer. on the other hand though, i am incredibly disappointed.

No. 625855

>>625848
I have no idea what the vibe of this post is but the asperger part took me out, hope you'll find a place though.

No. 625862

>>625855
i am stressed because the border is closed. but i need to go with him. he can barely perform basic tasks like cooking and cleaning. like he can't get how to cook even with instructions.

No. 625871

>>625862
Which province? Ontario is fucked for rent right now, but that's the usual I guess.

No. 625873

>>625871
ontario haha. we live in a super expensive city right now so it's not a big difference. but i am just super scared i will be turned away and we will be separated or something.

No. 625877

>>625873
Another ontariofag here. I think people have been turned away when they are attempting to drive into Canada, not when they are flying in. Good luck anon

No. 625878

>>625839
>>625822
Thank you for the replies anons, you're so sweet! Being a pet owner is really hard sometimes.
I took my cat to the vet and it turned out like I suspected, her thyroid levels had gone too low which is making her really nauseous. She got medication for the nausea and we halved her dosage for the hyperthyroidism medication. If it turns out the problem isn't the dosage but that the medicine just doesn't suit her we'll have to consider other treatment options. All of her blood work aside from her thyroid levels came out normal though, so that's a big relief.
In any case, she's home with me now and I'm just waiting for the nausea medicine to kick in and her to eat something.
Sorry for my awkward English I'm ESL.

No. 625884

Why did I accept to come 3 weeks in the backwood to feed my mom's cat?
She already pushed me to a semi panic attack because everything has to be looking fucking perfect.
Why does it matter? It's just going to be me all alone and I don't fucking care at all if the cushions are at perfect angle.
Ended up drugging myself for the first 2 day so I could sleep away (still fed the cat and took care of course).
Now, I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm already panicked at the idea of her coming back friday and poiting and putting back in place all of the things I did wrong (And it's probably all of them).

No wonder I have pathological anxiety and ran away when I could. I can't handle this. I don't want to live in a picture perfect house. What's the point. I'm living here, of course it's going to be a little messy even if I clean and tidy everyday.
This is a fucking nightmare and I chose to do it because I feel guilty of running away from all of this in the first place.

No. 625888

Hopping on the sick cat train I guess? Scared my cat has a urinary tract problem, he's been licking himself frequently for the last week or so and earlier tonight he shit and pissed on the floor (which is really unusual)

I should be able to take care of it financially if he needs treatment but I'm also not sure if I'm overreacting and working myself up over nothing? But I guess I'd rather overreact than under-react.

Just scared, is all. I love my cat so much and he's given me a reason to live in times where I haven't had many. The idea of losing him terrifies me.

No. 625892

>>625888
You should call your vet. They'll tell you whether you're over reacting or not. IMO shitting and pissing on the floor is very alarming because cats are clean animals and they only do that if they're sick in some way.

No. 625893

>>625888
I had a similar incident and brought my male cat in for a presumed UTI, but the vet said less than 10% of cases she sees in relation to piss is a true UTI. What they might do is check the urine for signs of trouble like sugars or WBCs and preform an xray to check for blockages. It ran me just under $300CAD to find out my cat is an asshole and terrified of the ceiling fan near his shitterbox.
It's always a tough decision because kidney/bladder issues in male cats can take a quick nosedive if left untreated. I'd recommend getting them checked out juuuuust in case, because it's always better to spend $300 and have a neutral outcome than risking anything else.

No. 625897

>>625888
I don't think you're overreacting, you know your cats behaviour best, and these are some signs of UTI/blockage so it won't hurt to go just to make sure.

No. 625902

>>625843
I think I remember you anon, can imagine how stress inducing it is. On the positive side, you know the exact amount of time your mom will need this expensive medication, knowing the specific amount of money needed will help you with figuring out the next move, because at least you know it's not going to be an infinite debt. I hope everything works out fine.

No. 625909

>>625845
Does your mum not know about this?

No. 626025

>>625862
> i need to go with him. he can barely perform basic tasks like cooking
People with aspergers can cook and clean. I mean it's called 'high functioning' autism for a reason.

No. 626061

Don’t you hate when you’re craving a food from a place that’s not opened yet? I know it’s 6AM but can I get your lunch menu already!

No. 626062

I'm thinking about writing my therapist an e-mail that I want to quit therapy.
She came back from her vacation and I thought that our first session together was on September 1st, because I was certain she told me this, but according to her my first appointment was two weeks earlier, so she gave me an 80€ bill for missing it, even though it was obviously a misunderstanding (it might have even been her fault, because I really don't remember her saying anything about this earlier appointment).
Then she spent the next session on trying to get me to talk about my feelings regarding the bill. At the end of that same session, I told her that I might move next year because this city really is horrible and neither me nor my boyfriend like it here or feel good about the thought of spending the next 4-5 years here. She felt attacked because then our "work" would come to an end, told me that it's not a good decision and spun it around like it's my boyfriend manipulating me into moving to the other city because he wants to go to uni there, which is not true. Of course him wanting to study there is one reason we want to move, but it's not the only reason and I'd say that I'm probably even more excited to get out of this hellhole than he is. (We literally live in the poorest, most run-down city in the whole country so I don't know why it's so hard to fathom that we want to move.)
I get that she's still a human and of course she doesn't want to lose a relatively easy patient, and of course we won't be able to continue but does that really have to mean that it was all for nothing? I think that it was kinda out of line for her to take it so personally. It wasn't the first time either. She doesn't talk a lot about the deeper thoughts I express to her but always tells me what she thinks I should do in regard to life choices, like if I should study or learn a trade (she pretty much told me it would be stupid of me to learn a trade) and compares it to her own life.
I thought we clicked in the beginning but I feel so uncomfortable about the whole thing now. She wants me to start psychoanalysis two times a week but I definitely don't want that anymore.
I know that this isn't anything severe, like that one anon who had her therapist literally scream at her, but I still feel like I've lost my trust in her. I don't feel like I can be real with her, I always feel like I need to justify my actions and thoughts and if I want to do that and be told what to do I might as well just talk to my mom. It just feels like I could find a therapist that's better suited for me.
Now I'm uncertain on what to do and it stresses me out. I have other important things on my mind and just want to get this out of the way but I don't really know what to do or say. And I don't even know for sure if she was even really out of line or if I'm just paranoid.

No. 626064

Say you don't want kids
>I'm totally with you, kids fucking suck
Say you don't want a husband
>I'm totally with you, men fucking suck
Say you don't want friends
>ANON YOU WILL LITERALLY DIE IF YOU DON'T HAVE FRIENDS

No. 626067

>>626061
I feel this but with breakfast. I don't get hungry until late in the day, and thank god mcdonald's has all day breakfast now because it'd be so heartbreaking to finally be ready for a bacon egg and cheese biscuit at 1:30PM and not have them served. go get your lunch at 11AM queen!

No. 626068

I feel so fucking miserable. Got the shop and got some cat found and hair product.
Can't get food, I can't eat it. Can't get anything else, I know it's a waste of money and won't make me happy.
I know I can't tell anybody, they'll be no help, I've tried already.
I guess I'll take a xanax and hope I look well enough for dinner with the dad who abandoned me at 13 to care for the girls of his new wife (they were the same age as me) but suddenly want now to be in my life again.

No. 626069

>>626064
I think people feel this way because they assume that your life is enriched by your friends when the other things are absent. If you don't have friends, do you have a partner, kids, or both and just prefer to tend to your family? Or even your immediate family? Do you prefer to be entirely alone, or do you have at least one person that you can talk to? I've never come across a friend-free person that prefers to be that way, so I'm curious in the most genuine way possible if you want to elaborate.

No. 626070

>>626064
It just reads like there’s something wrong with you seeing that humans are social creatures and friendships are less likely to be the level of toxic stressors like kids and marriage

No. 626075

>>625150
So what if he doesn't have kids until he's 40. That's the choice he made when he settled down with a woman five years his junior. Don't let him guilt you into having kids. TBH there's nothing unusual about having kids in your late 30's or even adopting an older child if you think you're too old for a newborn.

Deep down you know once you have kids, you're the one to sacrifice your career. I'll even put on my tinfoil hat and say he's jealous that you're on track to out-earn him and he wants to knock you down a peg. Ask him if he'd be a stay at home dad and gauge his response kek. But you know best.

No. 626078

>>626064
I'm a loner by choice, was talking to a relative lately about how there's a few people in our family like that. We've created these lives of near isolation for ourselves and we're thriving like that. I don't know if that's high functioning autism or what it is. I talk to a local cashier every morning as I'm buying a coffee and that's all the interaction that I need for the day.

No. 626084

>>626070
it still requires a ton of energy and effort just like those things though

No. 626087

>>626084
Yeah duh every relationship takes work to nurture and maintain, most people don’t have trouble reciprocate companionship. Friends certainly aren’t as much work as kid or marriage lmao
If you’re too lazy or depressed or autistic to invest in human connection then that’s fine bruh, it’s your life. But don’t act like others are weird for thinking you’re weird lol

No. 626089

>>626069
I have a partner I've been with for 6 years. We don't want kids, but I consider him to be enough social interaction for me and when I need conversation he can't give me, I just go on here and other sites. I prefer to spend my time engaging in my hobbies rather than being around other people. I think I might also have low key PTSD from my previous friends group, which was just a toxic cesspool of people, some of who would probably end up on /pt/ of their antics were online.

No. 626090

>>626087
>you’re too lazy or depressed or autistic
>don’t act like others are weird for thinking you’re weird lol
Nta but it's the vent thread, your reply was to basically hit them up with the exact shit they just vented about.. who is the autist again?

No. 626092

I'm becoming really vain. I hate who I am as a person no matter what I do, so I feel like my outer appearance is the only thing I have control over. I dress to the nines even when it doesn't make sense to, I mentally compare my weight to others as well. I was never like this. I feel like everyone is better than me so I look for outer things that prove we are at the least on the same level. Sucks to be a sucky person.

No. 626100

Anons what would you do?
My neet brother told me that he wants to get a tattoo. He still lives with my mum and only gets money via unemployment benefit. My mum recently got the water bill and complained about how much she has to pay. So he says to her that he has no money and she also said that she feel unfair to charge him money for the water bill because he is currently in a difficult situation (no job and will soon go into a day hospital because of is borderline). Now on the other side is my mum who pays everything for him (still buys him clothes, shoes etc. even when he is 24yo) and on the other hand there is my brother who spends every cent he can get his hands on stuff like 500€ tattoos. Now he told me not to tell my mum because he knows she will hate it and my mum told me I have to be "careful" with him in those times but at the same time I can't stand the idea that he leeches my mum off and does nothing than playing vidya games and cost her money.
Should I tell her or tell him before honestly that it's a shitty situation and idea when he should spend his money on paying his part while living with my mum.

No. 626103

I did like 5 interviews for jobs in the past two weeks and not a single one contacted me back, just yesterday I was told I got the job, and I quote "would be getting a call from the higher manager and an email with paper work" but that never happened. This is ridiculous, why are employers so immature?

No. 626108

>>626100
>my mum told me I have to be "careful" with him in those times
Is there someone at that daycentre that your mam could talk to if she's feeling threatened or intimidated by him? A social worker could work on getting him independant housing. This sounds like abuse waiting to happen

No. 626111

>>626089
That makes sense! I felt that way when I was with a long term partner. It sucked when we split (not saying that you will, we had plenty of issues lingering), but when I did branch out from that relationship, I was able to make high-quality friends, and it makes a huge difference. I'm happy that you're happy anon, and I'm sorry you had that poor experience with those people before. If you ever do make friends in the future, may they enrich your life.

No. 626112

>>626100
I'd talk to your brother about how it's unfair towards your mom (and that considering he has no job he should be more responsible with his money anyway) and give him a chance to do the right thing. But I don't think it's your place to snitch unless your mom has difficulties affording the waterbill herself.

No. 626117

>>626108

my mum has her own psychotherapist who guides her on how to deal with my brother because he seems kind of unstable and she is very overwhelmed with this situation.

>>626112
yeah, that's the way I feel as well. I mean he still has the chance to get himself a tattoo later down the line but he says he needs it now because it will help him in his current situation so he needs to spend all the money on it.

No. 626122

>>626100
I think most anons will tell you to rat him out, but that will definitely piss off your brother and sour the relationship. Your mom likely has an idea already that he's wasting his money, unless his tattoos are super hidden.

You should definitely talk to him privately and tell him it's unfair that he's blowing his money while not helping his mom at all, but if he's going to the hospital for his mental illness, it sounds pretty bad.

Frivolous spending is actually a symptom of BPD, so you could mention to your mom that you think his illness is making him spend money unwisely without giving her all the details. It doesn't like he's well enough to be in control of his finances, so that could be a talk with his doctors as well.

No. 626130

>>626067
McDonald's breakfast is all day in the US?
This is so unfair.

No. 626135

I don’t know if it’s because I’m darker after summer or if it’s because they think I look homeless but I got followed around by lp who look pics of me when I wasn’t even doing anything weird and now I don’t want to leave the house. I’m insecure about how ugly and bad I look already now it’s so much worse. My clothes look shit but they’re not gross or cheap I just have a weird body idk I’m stupid I hate how I look in public compared to normal people I feel subhuman

No. 626138

had a falling out with a colleague a few months ago (outside of work, we became friends and used to hang out), but now we don't talk. Except I swear she makes everything as awkward and uncomfortable as possible? Like we have this work group to exchange ideas for feedback and I was added the other day, and apparently she started bitching to another colleague about me ruining the group for her and like fuck, I get you don't like me but can we PLEASE keep it OUT of work. I hate that my boss or other higher ups might just get wind of this petty bullshit and it might mar their opinion of me.

anons, never, never make friends at work. Keep em as colleagues I swear, when it goes sour it's too much stress.

No. 626141

>>626122

>unless his tattoos are super hidden

he wants to get it on his under arm, so it's super visible. At the same time I got the impression that he wants a visibel one because he knows that my mum will hate it.

I will def talk to him again. I'm just super confused on how to react to anything right now so I kinda forget to tell him the first time around. He says that he wants to get his tat in around 3-4 weeks, he will start going to the day hospital next week. Maybe he could change his mind a little on that? Idk I will also talk to my mum again because she has not that much money as well to feed him for god knows how long.

>It doesn't like he's well enough to be in control of his finances

before that my mum was the one who got the child benefit for him because he is under 25 and went to school. That way she could get him money week by week but now he gets all the money because he is as mentioned a neet so suddenly he has a lot of new opportunities to splurge his money on useless things.

No. 626170

>>626135
I've been followed in a store once but idk if it was because of my appearance or because there's something autistic about my manners or that you can see the anxiety on my face.
Anyway, you're not alone kek.

No. 626174

>>626141
> but now he gets all the money
Bpd or not, if he has money coming in weekly he should be paying for his own basic needs. Depending on what country you're in.. some pay out 220 euros a week to unemployed neets. That's meant to cover living expenses… so why is your mom covering his living expenses?

No. 626188

>>626174
>so why is your mom covering his living expenses?

???? That's what I've asked her as well and as I said above, she says that it's unfair towards him because he has a hard time right now but it has been like this since forever so. I mean if there wasn't my mum, he would not have new clothes because that's just nothing of importance for him (or other stuff you need). I told her once that it isn't normal for a now 24 yo old guy needing his mum to buy basic clothes or shoes and she said that's she is aware that's it isn't normal and shouldn't be like that but isn't changing it either idk

No. 626189

>>626135
>>626170
>>>r/gangstalking

No. 626243

>>626100
>>626117
>>626141
>>626188
Brother is
>too unstable for even part time work and will require day time hospital visits
Brother is not
>too unstable to place a tattoo that he might not even like in his right mind and get his skin stabbed over and over again while spending money he didn't earn on this non-essential

You're doing him no favors keeping this a secret, just another day he loses more self-respect by being a comfortable little boy. He needs to pick a narrative and stick to it or else start admitting he can take on some responsibilities…he's of sound mind enough to scheme a hoard of money behind his mother's back and motivate to go get something permanent put on his body, I think he could stock shelves.

No. 626258

Holy fuck my mom is fucking crazy. Today I told her that I have online zoom lectures to attend so I told her to please leave me alone. She keeps nitpicking everything I do it's so fucking tiring to be around her. I can't even eat some chips in front of her without her saying something about it. Yesterday, I came back from work after an 8 hr shift and my whole body was sore so I was fucking tired and she kept telling me to do shit for her when i'm just trying to rest for a little bit. Now, I tell her to leave me alone because of my lectures and she's just yelling at me because I tell her to leave me alone. I can't fucking focus rn and she won't stop. ffs all I said was one little thing and she just goes off.

No. 626259

>>625730
>Joined a neighborhood watch FB page
Anon this was a mistake. They're all like this.

No. 626262

>>626258
I'm sorry anon. My mom was exactly like this to me growing up. Like to the point that I had to lock her out of my room because she wouldn't stop bothering me and giving me shit about everything. I hope you can move out soon.

No. 626271

Sometimes I get really paranoid that my ex and his shitty friends are stalking me. I don't think they actually would go to that much trouble though. I don't know why I'm like this but even on lc, I always find myself changing a ton of details about stories I tell out of fear that one of them is on this board, would screenshot it and they'd all laugh about it. Then there is a part of me that's like "nobody cares about you enough to put that much effort into something like that" and that somehow makes me feel worse. I wish I was not like this but alas

No. 626288

>>626271
I have that same fear & I don’t even use social media so idk how he even would

No. 626293

File: 1599678628213.jpeg (9.75 KB, 259x194, download (8).jpeg)

I ate a giant meal at work and now I've made myself sleepy while having 3 hours left at least.

No. 626294

everytime I post an opinion somewhere online I get owned in comments and it makes me feel like a moron. I know a lot of them must be bad takes and I accept that, I make impulsive comments a lot. I wanna learn to be okay with the shame and embarrassment that comes along with it though. And I want to stop doing it. I need a break from social media.

No. 626299

>>626294
At least you can admit that you get your ass handed to you. It just means you have a lot to learn and need to listen more before you speak, not a huge deal.

No. 626304

>>626294
A big part of it is the wording, tbh. There are so many bad takes on the internet and people take them seriously because they are worded in a certain way. It's even more obvious in "debates", where they use all these tactics to make a "comeback" and look cool in that context, but outside of that context what they said doesn't have much value.
that's how sjws gained power

No. 626306

>>626294
I assume you're not posting anonymously? If it's just anon be grateful that you have the opportunity to stage your opinions and receive feedback with no real consequence (except the blow to your ego).
If it's under your identity, pretend you're a lawyer and give yourself a minute to think of an argument against what you're about to post. If you can't poke any holes in it, then post it. On the other hand, if you can think of at least two counter arguments that you wouldn't be able to refute, don't post it.

No. 626311

>>626299
>>626304
>>626306
thank you guys, i appreciate the good advice. I will be keeping these in mind. Made me feel a lot better about it.

No. 626316

Is anyone else deathly afraid of doctors and hospitals? I avoid them at all costs because I don't trust them. I've never had a doctor take the time to actually listen to me. They don't even look me in the eye, start talking over me immediately, and always give me shit about researching symptoms, or having even a vague idea of what might be wrong with me. It takes upwards of months to get a fucking appointment with you people. You really think I'm just going to twiddle my thumbs the whole time and not even bother to look into the problem myself? Plus, as an Amerifag, I am very aware of the fact that our medical industry is entirely profit-driven and that virtually everyone involved is in it for the money. I don't believe any of them truly care about helping people. If I have to get some sort of procedure done, they are always so rough and callous with me, even the female doctors. I almost always leave a doc's office crying after even just a pap smear. God help you if you cry during the procedure, they just stare at you like you're crazy or make fun of you, telling you "it's not a big deal, what's wrong with you?" Fuck doctors. They're all sociopaths.

No. 626324

>>626316
I had a doctor get a semi while putting his thumb in my rectum after I went to the ER with internal bleeding at age 19 and I haven’t seen a doctor since.

No. 626329

>>626324
Jfc I'm sorry anon. Why did he even need to do that for internal bleeding?

No. 626331

>>626329
He said he had to do a stool check. I wanted to kms.

No. 626334

>>626316
I work for my state’s physician regulatory agency and can confirm many physicians are fucked. Even if it’s not something overtly egregious many have substance issues or malpractice. If you’ve ever been to an urgent care, chances are your doc was on probation or faced action from their licensing board

No. 626336

>>626334
I had a friend who dated an anesthesiologist and it’s made me fear surgery as a young woman. They don’t give a shit about HIPPA. Supposedly they’d take selfies with hot women once they were under etc.

No. 626337

>>626334
Not surprising. I think a lot of truly psychopathic people go into medicine because they can thrive in a high-stress environment due to lack of empathy, but I imagine even the most well-intentioned doctors inevitably get corrupted by the hierarchical, profit-driven structure of the American medical industry. I wonder how we compare to other countries in this regard.

No. 626339

>>626316
Pap exams are a scam and are rarely performed with full informed consent. It's foul how we are strongarmed into what basically accounts to medical rape for no reason. Imagine if men were treated like that about prostate cancer. My body is not a ticking cancer bomb. My body, my choice. It's disgusting how other women act about this, too. They treat me like a petulant little girl, just let the good doctor rape you and be quiet. Miss me with that shit.
I went to planned parenthood for my first and only pap exam and the doctor was a complete bitch to me. She used three different speculums, told me I have a "big vagina", and told me, "You know you have a vein here on your labia, right?" and I'm thinking yeah I've had this vagina for around 23 years I'm pretty familiar with it you stupid bitch. She mashed my breasts like they were modeling clay so hard I had bruises for weeks. I was basically assaulted and had to pay for it. I left the exam crying and in pain. Never again.

No. 626340

>>626336
In the USA it is legal for them to perform a pap exam on you when you are under, without your consent. You could wake up with a sore pussy and have no idea it was because 5 medical students had their fingers inside you when you were knocked out.

No. 626342

>>626339
Women who make comments like that know what they’re doing.

No. 626344

>>626340
Jesus christ i hate this world

No. 626347

>>626340
When I was barely 14 I had to have a sinus surgery. I happened to be on my period at the time and the nurse said I could wear my underwear. When I woke up and came to my tampon wasn’t in anymore. I wasn’t a heavy bleeder, I still have no idea why.

No. 626348

>>624935
This post made me feel suicidal and I can’t stop thinking about it days later

No. 626356

>>626339
This belongs in the tinfoil thread

No. 626357

>>626316
I went to the doctor for something (weird chronic problem I’d been having) a couple years ago and the doctor literally GOOGLED my symptoms in front of me and read off the “treatment” section of webmd. Like the goddamn audacity of that bitch.

No. 626358

>>626336
Sorry to nitpick but it’s HIPAA

No. 626360

>>626357
This isn’t in any way me trying to insult you, but are you overweight? I’ve noticed that doctors seem to treat overweight people worse.

No. 626361

>>626358
Girl idgaf, either way that man and his colleagues were scum

No. 626362

>>626356
It's a vent in the vent thread, but you are entitled to your opinion. I know I said some things that are hard to face

No. 626364

>>626357
Are you sure it was webmd? It’s pretty normal for primary care doctors to look things up while you’re there but not with webmd

No. 626366

>>626357
Lmao I had that happen to me too. It's hilarious because they usually give patients shit for googling their own symptoms.

>>626356
The first part of the post is pretty paranoid, but I had something similar happen with a gyno who shoved about 5 speculums into me, told me I had a massive vagina and was so nitpicky throughout the whole thing that I started crying and shaking. I didn't go to a gyno for years after that. When I started going again, I'd always ask if there was something wrong with my vagina and they'd say I was fine. Some doctors really are just nuts.

No. 626367

>>626356
While anon could have been exaggerating, Americans women are told to get exams and smears a lot more often than in any other country, and some doctors are objectively cruel to people especially if they see them as different. I’m more apt to believe that anon had a bitch doctor because they do exist. Not everyone is morally sound, and medical professionals have a business economy to maintain just like any other cash cow.

No. 626368

>>626360
Nope, normal BMI. I was working out regularly at the time (I’ve been lazy in quarantine though) and she still told me to manage it with “diet and exercise.” Like I was obviously already doing that and had been having this problem for several years, sucks to feel completely disregarded.

No. 626371

>>626366
No obviously I agree some doctors have awful bedside manner. I’m talking about the part about pap smears and ‘rape’. It’s objectively wrong, anti-vax tier conspiracy.

No. 626372

>>626366
Was the gyno male or female? Age range? What a cunt

No. 626373

>>626371
The "rape" part was hyperbole but I stand by what I wrote. Many women still think they need a yearly cervical cancer screening or they will for sure get cancer and that simply is not true. It's fearmongering and profit-based, at that. Look into it or not, I was venting, not looking to change any minds.

No. 626374

>>626367
What do they do in other countries? In the US they suggest pap smears every three years beginning at the age of 21. I hardly consider that excessive tbh

No. 626375

>>626368
Yeah that's doctor-speak for "I don't know what's wrong with you and don't care enough to look into it further." In their defense though, a lot of chronic issues, particularly pain-related inflammatory issues, don't have a direct medical cause that we know of and are often linked to stress. Changing your diet and lifestyle is actually the best scenario on this case.

No. 626376

>>626364
It might have been another site, but it was one of the first results on google when searching the symptoms. I don’t remember if it was actually webmd or a similar site.

No. 626377

>>626368
Was it a specialist or just a GP? Bc if it’s a GP that’s standard practice to look up the patients symptoms (not on webmd). They don’t memorize every single one of the tens of thousands of possible illnesses/problems someone can have and all the symptoms associated with them.

No. 626379

>>626372
Female. I'd say she was in her 50's. It was a really long time ago.

>>626373
Interesting. I've never had a gyno tell me this. I was always told to get one every 2-3 years. Once a year is super excessive.

No. 626380

>>626374
Burgerfag, my gyno told me I needed a pap at least once a year.

No. 626381

>>626374
5 years after 40 where i am from.

No. 626382

>>626367
Where I live pap smears start at 25 and only happen every 3 years if normal (all paps are free here too) I delayed my first pap and at my first smear I had cin3 cells. Feel lucky to live where I do.

No. 626384

>>626382
Canada?

No. 626387

A few years ago after I started university I also started going to the local anime con twice a year because that was a good way to spend time with friends on the weekend. I grew up poor and since I entered university I was eligible for a small scholarship but since I lived with my family at the time I didn't have to spend a lot of money so could save a lot of money. Because of that I spent a lot of money "treating myself" on figurines, prints, posters, merchandises, manga, etc. because that seemed like a new luxury and I was so happy to have this much money to spend on things I always wanted. And seeing American artists I liked on tumblr posting everything they bought and sold in their huge cons kinda encouraged me to do the same thing.

Now I hate that I bought so many useless things back then and I wish I never did that because that was a lot of money when I think about it and try to imagine how much that was in total, and it takes too much space. I sold a lot of books, threw out many badges and all my big posters, and I wish I could easily seLl my figurines and plushes. My friends are interested in them but I'm still angry at myself somehow for spending so much money on stupid shit. I think being unemployed is getting to me.

No. 626388

>>626377
I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a specialist. Not really expecting them to know everything, but it felt like a waste to go there after years of dealing with something to be told “lmao just eat better and walk more bro, pls pay me $60 for your googled diagnosis.”

No. 626393

I feel like civilisation is going to collapse. Like I can’t imagine life 3 years from now.

No. 626395

>>626393
Because of COVID?

No. 626396

>>626393
It’s not. Things are super crazy right now, but it will pass.

No. 626398

>>626395
Yeah, more so the economic fall out from it

No. 626400

Overall I have a good partnership with my fiancé or 3 years, but our sex life bothers me. The issue is he doesn’t touch me at all during sex. Sex for us is either me blowing him or him penetrating me from behind while we lay on our sides. Very occasionally we kiss (like once a month or so) during sex and sometimes we hold hands or caress each other. In the beginning of our relationship he would touch me or finger me occasionally but this hasn’t happened in like a year… I know sex is by no means our only avenue for intimacy, but sex has become cold and robotic for me and I the last few times we’ve done it I’ve felt very shitty afterwards. I don’t know how to broach this topic with him, I don’t really like talking about sex and have trouble communicating my needs in general

No. 626401

>>622665
Why are males so oppressive? So gross in their treatment towards women? I want them fucking banished

No. 626402

I can't stop thinking about this girl I used to talk to. We met on bumble and never irl but we'd talk like everyday. She wanted to date me, but I didn't feel that way for her. She was cute but overweight, a lot younger than me and super naive about a lot of things, so she felt more like a little sister. Anyway, after a while my mental health started getting worse and I had a breakdown and got rid of my phone and just ghosted everybody. Now I'm doing better but I don't remember her number or last name so I don't think we'll ever reconnect which is probably for the best. I just feel so bad for her, she was really sweet and had just recently come out and I hope I didn't fuck up her confidence

No. 626405

>>626393
Same. At best in some countries that weren't too affected by current events things will just stagnate.

No. 626406

>>626393
I've been feeling this way since I was like 17 or so. The fact that it hasn't collapsed yet and things continue to ebb and flow in terms of bad and good leads me to believe it's a personal problem and not actually indicative of reality. You're probably just experiencing a lot of anxiety anon.

No. 626415

>>626316
yes!! Holy shit I went to the er last year because my eczema was so bad and the doctor didn’t even bother looking at me. He just prescribed the strongest steroid he could which made it even worse.

No. 626421

>>626400
Anon, the only way your fiancé will know about your feelings is if you share them with him. Sit down and talk to him

No. 626435

File: 1599687680121.png (77.73 KB, 1798x360, raid on cc and lolcow.png)

>>626401

why can't men just leave us the fuck alone???

No. 626438

>>626435
Lol this guy has a lot of time on his hands

No. 626441

>>626339
agreed. I've never had a pap smear and I'll probably never get one until they have a less invasive method of cancer screening. Which will probably be never because most women have so spine and are willing to put up with this shit.

No. 626442

>>626435
He really sees this as an epic pwn

No. 626444

>>626435
Is this what people with no jobs do on their free time?

No. 626449

>>626339
Not trying to discredit you or anything, but that doctor just sounds like a bad doctor. Don't lump her with with the rest of gynos who are great at their job.

No. 626455

>>626435
Tbh nigger dicks are exactly what this place deserves for coddling moids and trannies. Not like it didn't kill off most of its userbase anyway.

No. 626457

>>626455
The fact that we didn’t do anything to deal with spergs like you sooner is what killed most of the user base off

No. 626459

File: 1599688707422.jpeg (63.16 KB, 480x360, 9A6C77FC-34EE-476E-98C1-95B7EF…)

>>626455
Oh fuck off

No. 626461

>>626457
Sure, have fun being c.c 2.0

No. 626463

>>626441
Trust me, I’ve had Pap smears and I have no idea how you could make it less invasive? 100% there’d be a quick and absolutely more comfortable method if men needed those but cmon, there are doctors who are gentle as fuck and you actually do not feel shit even without a healthy cervix

No. 626464

File: 1599688851743.jpg (287.01 KB, 1500x844, GettyImages-a0041-000589-5a127…)

>>626435
so now lolcow will be this but with black dicks

No. 626466

>>626449
Different anon, but I had a similarly bad experience with a pap smear too. My old doctor "strongly encouraged" it even though I was well under 21. Not saying it's everyone, but a lot of women definitely have shitty experiences with doctors.

No. 626469

>>626463
I mean there’s not a quick or comfortable method for prostate exams

No. 626472

I wish I had as much time on my hands as these stupid jobless failsons do

No. 626476

>>626463
wouldn't it be possible to do the cell scraping yourself at home and bring it in like a pee test? I know you have to stick it pretty far in but I mean it's not hard to poke your own cervix with a long q-tip

anyways relating to this pap smear talk I just remembered how when I was 15 and went to the doctor with my mom she literally asked my (male) doctor if I needed to get a pap smear. He said not until I was 21 but jfc I can't believe my mom basically asked the doctor if he wanted to stick a spoon up her teenaged daughters pussy

No. 626478

>>626457
All you did was prove anon right. Lolcow has gone down hill so bad since they started coddling moids, trannies and doormat lib fems. The cow threads are fucking boring, ot is fucking boring, just pull the plug on this shit website.(>>>meta)

No. 626484

>>626469
Yea i bet that's not lovely either but in general men are taken more seriously, don't wanna get into the whole do men need to be a certain age or convince a doctor to get treatment for that prostate cancer to be removed or treated properly like women do with cervical and ovary shit. I am very ot with this sorry, I just been in the gyno limbo and been surprised by how gentle different doctors can be.

No. 626485

>>626476
That’s a perfectly normal thing for your mom to ask

No. 626489

>>626485
wtf really? I would have been traumatized if I had to get a pap smear. Doesn't anyone think it's fucked up to force a minor to take off their pants and have someone touch their genitals? Just me? ok

No. 626491

>>626489
She was just asking what age people need one as she probably didn’t know and was just worried. It wouldn’t mean you’re forced against your will to get one on the spot?

No. 626494

>>625897
>>625893
>>625892

thanks anons, i bit the bullet and made an appointment with the vet. taking him in about an hour – realized it's worth the $$$ to get the peace of mind and know that he's not suffering. also ty >>625893 for the cost estimate – I'm in canada too so that actually helped a lot. Sorry your cat is an asshole (but aren't they all)?

anyways if any of y'all are religious pls pray for my boy while i take him to the cat dick doctor.

No. 626495

>>626469
They developed blood tests, google it

No. 626496

>>626484
Objectively there are problems with women being taken seriously in the medical system but at the same time, everything isn’t some sexist act of ‘medical rape’ or whatever. Some procedures are necessary and unpleasant for both genders and it’s just the biological reality of it. A lot of the posts about pap smears itt are extremely conspiratorial and inaccurate.

No. 626499

>>626491
I guess that's more for me personally, if the doctor said yes I know my mom would have forced me to do it even if I didn't want to, but I guess my own mom just doesn't respect my boundries. Still, I assume some teenager do end up getting "routine" pap smears and probably don't feel like they have the option to say no.

I'll stop sperging about this now but I just think it's all kinda fucked up

No. 626500

>>626495
It’s inaccurate and not done as a replacement to the physical exam, it’s usually done as the next step

No. 626501

>>626496
I have no idea why the hell anons are raging against pap smears, or refusing to get those, that is literally the only way to know if you have cells changes, well that plus biopsy. I went a year later than I was supposed to due to shit and am grateful that they caught my shit early on. Medical rape my ass, uncomfortable at times, yes, rape, no.

No. 626503

>>626499
I don’t know any country that is pressuring teens to have ‘routine’ pap smears

No. 626507

>>626499
> Still, I assume some teenager do end up getting "routine" pap smears and probably don't feel like they have the option to say no.
But you can say no? You can tell your doctor that you feel uncomfortable because of it and, a doctor with ethics, might explain to you why it’s important that you get certain tests done, and if that doesn’t convince you, or your mother, the ethical doctor won’t pressure you into it.

I mean, there’s a bunch of people that I know that have never gone to a gynecologist, you can also just do that and hope that nothing’s fucked.

No. 626508

From dawn til dusk my boyfriend sits at the computer in the living room playing Old School Rune Scape. I don’t understand the appeal whatsoever, he’s been playing it since he was little & I get that it probably has a nostalgic factor that keeps it cool to him, but it is just SO damn boring I don’t understand.
When I got lost in games it was usually due to he roleplaying aspect & making friends. He literally just grinds on tasks all day long.

No. 626520

It’s so stupid when girls are like ‘if she didn’t have x, y, and z’ she wouldn’t even be considered pretty like… okay? And if my grandmother had wheels she’d be a bike. She does have those things so what does it matter. Obviously if you take away all the things that make someone attractive, they won’t be attractive anymore, what point are you trying to make here?

No. 626526

I was scrolling through my YouTube recommended feed and see a suggestion for a video that stands out from the other ones that cater to what I normally watch.
"Study says half your friends don't really like you, here's how to tell"
Now obviously this is a great clickbait video which is what the algorithm mostly cares about to keep you watching but.. at the same time this felt oddly personal. Like the AI sees that I watch some mental health-related stuff sometimes and wants to really feed into those issues. Like it's sadistic.
Also my extroverted ass just misses seeing friends and acquaintances more often. I have my mum and my boyfriend but I just feel disconnected from the world and lonely the older I get and I'm just so stuck in life. I hate this year. I'm just not coping well.

No. 626528

>>626507
You can if you are past a certain age, but they still pressure you heavily. Also if you are uncoscious and a doctor deems it necessary they can give you one, or simply if they feel like showing the med students how it's done no matter if the patient consentend or not. It's legal to do this almost everywhere.

No. 626534

>>626528
There is good reason for them to pressure you though. It’s like the ‘pressure’ to get your kids vaccinated.

About the med student thing, I completely this is wrong but this happens with prostate exam practice as well, and other medical procedures being ‘practiced’ on you by students. It’s not a pap smear specific problem at all, and I’d be weary of anyone trying to paint it as such. I know it’s legal in most US states but not sure about the rest of the world.

No. 626535

File: 1599693288818.jpg (9.47 KB, 341x462, 18198304_1490384274368839_3154…)

A friend of mine is dead set on getting a cat in the future and I'm pissed about it. I'm not trying to be a bitch here, but they don't live in the best place. It's falling apart and has a lot of pest control issues, bugs, rats, snakes, etc. I've seen bugs in their fridge before even and there is actually rat shit on the carpets. Definitely not even an environment for people, let alone a pet. Plus, their financial situation isn't great and I don't think it's wise to get a pet if you can't afford emergency situations should the need every come up. I have two cats that seemed healthy when I got them but it turns out they both need special food and medicine for their surprise health issues and it costs me a lot of money each month just for that, plus random vet visits, flea medicine, etc.

I just think it's so irresponsible. I've tried to bring this up gently in the past but they are very flippant and think everything will be fine. Maybe they've just gotten used to living in a fucking hovel or something. I don't know. That poor cat.

No. 626536

My girl friends (who all have low self-esteem) posting suggestive pictures of themselves (just to be desirable and seen as "confident") and talking about wanting plastic surgery breaks my heart.
I wish they could understand there's nothing wrong with them and that they don't deserve to objectify themselves for men.
Fuck pornography, the cosmestic/plastic surgery/fashion industry and scrotes for making millions of girls feel bad in their own skin, seriously

No. 626540

I'm tired of the cycle of feeling bad about myself for not being conventionally fun (I'm asocial and use no substances) followed by defensively disliking people who are conventionally fun.
It's not even that I want to change or that I actually hate people who are outgoing and do normie activities. I just hate feeling like I have to compromise my happiness to be loved by someone.

Where are the uptight-teetotal-yet-not-religious weirdos?

No. 626547

>>626534
It happens and it's wrong with prostate exams too, but 90% of med students in a study admited to doing this. It's insane and i doubt they are doing this to men at the same rate. Any kind of exam that involves genitals should only be made if the patient is awake or consented beforehand.
Men are not pressured like this from a young age to get prostate exams every 3 years despite them being just as important and there is no epidemic of them dropping dead from prostate cancer, it's extremely rare even if there are way more cases than cervical cancer.

No. 626550

>>626547
You ‘doubting it happens to men at the same rate’ is based on nothing. This happens with many procedures and is done in extremely controlled environments. It’s still wrong, but it’s not being done as some specific attack on women and isn’t a Pap smear specific problem.

There is less pressure because prostate cancer is a lot less common in young men than cervical cancer is in young women. After 50 men are expected to get regular screening. It’s not some grand conspiracy to ‘keep women down’ or whatever by forcing them to get pap smears. It’s for their own benefit. If you want to sperg about this conspiracy theory more then you should probably go to the tinfoil thread.

No. 626553

>>626547
> there is no epidemic of them dropping dead from prostate cancer

Anon, prostate cancer is the most common cancer for men. 416,000 men died from prostate cancer in 2017

No. 626554

>>626547
www.nytimes.com/2020/02/17/health/pelvic-medical-exam-unconscious.amp.html

I have a hard time viewing this as ethical in any way. In 2017 they gave a nurse a pelvic exam during stomach surgery.

No. 626555

File: 1599694723096.jpg (153.07 KB, 1480x629, marquise.jpg)

Oh farmers, I'm going to vent to you because this shit is getting to my anxieties and I can't go to my real life friends because I'm so tired of feeling judged for romantic life predicaments. My boyfriend and I were talking about our relationship plans in the next couple years, and getting married is at least in the cards. He was picking my brain about engagement ring ideas and I half-jokingly brought up that I could make him a spreadsheet. He unironically agreed and we both came to the conclusion that it's better to be specific & communicative about the things we want. Confession, farmers: I'm almost 30 and this is the closest I've ever gotten in a relationship where an (atheistic) guy actually wanted to marry me and not keep me as a forever gf. I wasted half of my 20s with a fucking idiot. Not to digress too far into this issue, but before my current bf I've had exes promise me shows of commitment like this and ultimately never follow through. They just turn out to be shit and I break it off. It's why I can't go to my friends about this either, cause tbh, until a guy puts that ring on me I don't take his word for shit anymore. I wouldn't be able to handle gushing my heart to my friends again just to eat my foot when I'd have to end things later for a vetted reason. My friends probably look down on me by now and think I'm lucky to get whatever I can. Maybe that's irrational, but it hurts so bad. Albeit older, they're in marriages or have at least been in long-term relationships for awhile, and here I am having to start over all the while having had shit luck with men. It's hard not feeling left behind or like I've made the wrong choices. It's difficult getting over the trust issues I have about my current boyfriend while telling myself he loves me and isn't going to fuck me over like the others.

Anyways, anyways. Anyway, that was a bigger tangent than I thought. So the main anxiety comes into play over the fact that I don't know what to fucking choose. I'm laying out a bunch of information, graphics, and links in this spreadsheet but even I feel overwhelmed. How is he supposed to feel? I'm set on having a marquise diamond as the stone but I have several ideas for style and can think of pros and cons for all of them.
The biggest hurdle is getting over the fact that boyfriend wants us to have yellow gold bands, which is a compromise for me because I don't really wear yellow gold and would prefer platinum. He doesn't care for the color and it reminds him of what his ex wanted. I think the yellow gold has grown on me a bit, but should I insist on platinum? He did say it's about what I wanted. Whatever the case, I just know that at the end of the day, I will like a cool toned band over a warm one. So there's that.
Then the band itself, oh my fucking god I do not know. I think I want something fancy like pic related. I do wear a lot of cute and frilly things so it wouldn't be too far-fetched of a choice for me, but I'm afraid of it being impractical and prone to damage. Then I switch to wanting a more simple band like a pave solitaire, but then I worry I'll feel plain and will be wanting for more. Like I'll regret my ring down the line.
The kicker is I don't even know what his budget is. I should have asked. I'm putting a variety of shit into this spreadsheet but nervous that he'll turn into the typical man and shoot for the cheapest option without really considering what suits me best. I even hinted at a customization in one scenario, and all I can think is would a man really put in that effort for me? He did always put effort into our dates, and I think he'd do whatever I'd ask him to. But still, I worry.

I've been looking for advice anywhere on the internet, but the closest I've come to reviewing what other women have is r/engagementrings. I don't know what I'm doing.

No. 626557

>>626554
Where have I said it is? Ive said like seven times imo it’s not ethical. This happens with prostate exams, and multiple other procedures. My point was that it’s not evidence of pap smear ‘medical rape’ being done specifically to women, and to be weary of people specially using it to discourage people of getting pap smears. The problem of medical practice being done on unconscious patients is it’s own issue and not related to some conspiracy about pap smears.

No. 626559

>>626558
Ahh sorry I read it too quickly ♥

No. 626560

>>626557
Anon I wasn’t arguing with you, I was agreeing with you. Didn’t mean for it to sound combative.

No. 626561

>>626316
I had MILD cystic acne and after years just sucking it up I went to a derm. I went on one condition- I absolutely did not want to go on accutane for personal reasons (mainly to do with the birth defects it causes.) The derm I went to basically treated me like I was stupid and tried to get me to like the idea of accutane the entire appointment. I politely declined each and every time and the appointment ended with her giving me a cream she said "wouldn't work anyway" and the paperwork for an accutane prescription. I was dealing with 3-5 cystic pimples a month, not some extreme situation. I didn't even use the cream, I honestly wondered if she gave me something that wouldn't work intentionally so I'd have to come back. I know there are great doctors out there who have a love for their job and their patients but I really don't want to ever gamble with getting stuck with a shitty one. I consider myself lucky my bad experience was just over something cosmetic.

No. 626562

>>626561
Does it only cause birth defects if you get pregnant while on it though?

No. 626563

>>626562
Yes, but tbh that idea alone is enough to make me want to steer clear. I have so many fears surrounding pregnancy despite wanting children someday so I try not to add anything to my life that can cause paranoia.

No. 626565

>>626563
On top of that, so many people end up having joint issues from it and there have been plenty of cases where the acne came back. I don’t understand doctors that strongarm it.

No. 626568

>>626565
I just did a search and quickly found at least one case of birth defects that happened after the mother stopped taking it. Admittedly she conceived soon after she stopped, but it still contradicts the mainstream medical narrative that it's safe to get pregnant right after you stop taking it https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2703771/

No. 626569

>>626568
The mainstream medical narrative is to wait at least one month, or at least that’s what I was told when I was on it

No. 626571

>>626561
oh my god, accutane…my doctor told me to take it when I asked him if I could get a referal to a dermatologist. He told me it might cause depression since I had a history but claimed it would go away when I stopped taking the pills. Yeah…I could only take it for 3 months before I was not only severely depressed but also paranoid and anxious. I told him I was concerned and he told me again to stick it out so I quit.

Also what's with doctors always making shitty comments when you go in for acne like "dating must be hard for you" like, prick, this is why I stopped seeking acne treament

No. 626572

>>626569
maybe this is just due to having a shitty derm as I explained, but when she was trying to quell my fears she said it'd be fine to get pregnant right after stopping

No. 626573

>>626571
samefage forgot to mention that my depression didn't go away after I stopped taking them, years of taking antidepressants down the drain but hey now at least I'm fuckable lmao

No. 626577

>>626569
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19961047/

a case of fetal deformity 3 months after stopping accutane

No. 626579

>>626571
They want to feed into your insecurities obviously. Accutane is vitamin A, and just like excess of any vitamin in your body, it can do some severe damage. The kind of damage you end up doing on your joints may not be noticed at first, but it certainly is when you get older. That amount of vitamin a is just ridiculous and harmful.

No. 626582

>>626577
Idk, this study says it only proposes ‘the possibility’ there could be a risk. It’s over 10 years old the overwhelming evidence since is that it’s safe after the first month. Obviously rare side effects can happen with most medications though.

No. 626583

>>626579
It isn’t harmful for most people though, those side effects are considered severe and rare and they tell you about them before you start.

No. 626584

>>626582
My friends mom has always had strong opinions on accutane because she took it fresh out of high school, then about a year after taking it when my friend was born their was tons of complications and to this day she blames accutane.

No. 626585

>>626582
>>626583
I don't mean to be aggro about it or anything obviously it's a personal decision, I just get ticked that doctors treat this like the end all be all of acne treatment when there are less invasive methods that are also effective.

No. 626586

>>626583
Joint pain is a common side effect and isn’t at all rare. It isn’t something good for the body, point blank.

No. 626587

>>626584
I think for me it’s just that this kind of thing sounds like how anti-vax parents with autistic kids talk. I get why they feel the way they do but I’m not going to really be swayed when there’s no actual evidence to back up what they’re saying.

No. 626588

File: 1599696625520.jpg (135.76 KB, 1500x1000, il_fullxfull.581362234_64zq.jp…)

>>626555
Holy shit anon, you're making this too complicated. Who the fuck cares if you both have matching wedding bands? He can have his yellow gold, just get platinum for yourself. Ask him what his process will be, ask him about budget, communicate with him what you want.

When we discussed my engagement ring, I gave my fiance three ring choices. I would've been happy with any of them. Did I regret the ring I ended up with and wanted more sometimes? Definitely. But it's just a fucking ring and if I wanted to, if I really wanted to, I could just get another one.

Get what you like. Stop worrying about what he likes.

No. 626589

>>626586
Sorry I thought you were talking about long term joint pain, like after you stop taking it.

No. 626590

>>626587
why compare it to vaccines though? Acne treatment is completely elective and unnecessary

No. 626592

>>626587
For me the difference lies that vaccines are medically necessary while getting rid of acne is ultimately cosmetic. And as stated before, there are many other options for acne treatment.

No. 626594

>>626592
*I should say cosmetic in most cases, obviously in severe scenarios it becomes a whole different beast

No. 626595

>>626590
I‘m not comparing the diseases just the way of thinking about medication. I also don’t think it’s unnecessary because acne is a disease and severe acne can be physically painful and emotionally scarring for people.

No. 626596

>>626589
It’s fine. While you may be healthy and lead a healthy life after accutane, excess vitamin A makes you more susceptible to bone fracture, and that’s even well below the dose often used for accutane. It’s definitely a very serious decision. Personally, I regret taking it and I would not recommend it to anyone unless their acne was so severe they were on the verge of an hero.

No. 626597

>>626592
True, but they are often not effective especially for severe acne. I wasn’t saying acne and like measles are comparable, just that the reasoning they used was in that they both go about basing medical decisions on anecdotes that go against scientific consensus.

No. 626598

>>626595

I'm >>626571
I agree it can be physically painful because I've had cysts before and they were pretty bad, but I don't think it's good to encourage people to take meds with so many potential and adverse side effects to cure a disease that won't kill you. Especially when you can end up with a real debilitating illness like depression

No. 626600

>>626596
>I would not recommend it to anyone unless their acne was so severe they were on the verge of an hero.

That was my experience and I didn’t really have any side effects so that probably influences how I feel about it.

I remember talking to a dermatologist who said that recently there’s a growing consensus that it’s better to prescribe a very low dose but for longer, I wonder if the vitamin A thing was why.

No. 626608

>>626600
Vitamin A is stored in your liver and it can potentially stay there for up to two years. I’m studying science and a big part of my work has been with vitamins and supplements and the harm they can cause the body. Vitamin A is like magnesium in the sense that you can’t really know the possible damage you’re doing to you body long term. The body is an intricate machine and I think we should all be more aware of how impactful medications actually are on us over time, if at least to try to combat the complications that could arise as we age. I’m glad if you have your skin issues under control but I do urge you to be very careful with yourself in the coming years and take care of your bones and liver!

No. 626651

>>626553
For women it's breast cancer, we get constant screenings for that and are taught to feel for lumps etc. All good. The second leading cause of cancer deaths in women is lung, third being colon, but how many women do you know who have regular CT scans and colon tests done every three years? Hell you saw how many prostate cancer deaths there are and men are still not as pressured to test for it.
I'm not against them btw, i think they should be done and eon't usually cause harm, but the pressure is ridiculous when other forms of cancer kill at a greater or similar rate and are ignored.

>>626557
I call penetrating someone with something in the ass or vagina who is not awake and did not give consent rape or at least assault when done outside of an emergency, don't know about you.
The questionaire done for the rate that men get surprise non consenting rectum examination turned out that more than half or them were done in an unconscious guy and a quarter with no consent iirc. Really different from the 90% of women. Doctors have biases they carry on their work and womens consent is overlooked a lot.
Also i'm not against pap smears, it is an important screening tool. Have one every year or whatever your docs recommendation is if you feel safer like that and it causes you no issues, i'm mad at how some people act like if you don't get one religiously you have like a 50% chance of getting cancer every year when it's simply not true if you are not high risk. It's an invasive procedure, it's painful very often and it can be torture for someone who has trauma, fearmongering that they will die and pressuring them doesn't help.

No. 626654

>>626651
The original anon was saying pap smears themselves are medical rape not the unconscious ones. I personally also just do not see this huge pressure for pap smears, maybe it’s country specific idk. People will say you should get them but if you’re traumatised or something I don’t think it’s common for people to respond to that with ‘you have a 50% chance of dying of cancer’ or something like that. No one has to get a pap smear but even if someone has trauma they’re still at risk and it’s obviously best to catch things early.

No. 626656

my bf was recently in the crossfire of a shooting between two cars. a bullet did go through his car as he was getting something out of the back, but it was aimed at one of the two cars involved in the scuffle.

i go on instagram to see he’s posted pictures of his windshield and headrest where the bullet went through. he mentions there was a casing next to him. but here’s the kicker: he says he was “targeted”. wtf, absolutely not. he loves to spin a large tale when it comes to any situation he experiences, and he’s great at it, admittedly. but this was too far.

i called him, saying i wanted to “give him shit”. now he’s all upset saying he was the only one there, we never know if he was or wasn’t, etc. i agreed it was traumatic and awful, but he definitely was NOT targeted and to start off a post saying that is very misleading. i was also in my backyard when it happened. heard the car that fired shots say “who the fuck is that?!” when the other car came around the corner.

i may also be upset because i was pretty close to the line of fire as well and he never consoled me or said he was grateful nothing happened to me, etc. idk.

my roommate said i was “aggressive” but i was just being loud and also smiling the whole time i was giving my bf shit? ugh

No. 626663

>>626654
Oh, i'm sorry, i didn't see that. I don't see the normal procedure as medical rape too, it is invasive but it's not like there is any other way to test for it.
Personally i've seen people say that cervical cancer is almost guaranteed without pap smears to women who didn't want to. Maybe it is due to location ig. I think everyone should know the risks since there is a risk like you said but i don't think this huge pressure is helpful for something personal like this.

No. 626668

>>626656
Anon i don't think he was being very rational since he almost died. That really was not the time to call to nitpick on a word choice but to console him

No. 626670

>>626656
Maybe it’s just the way you portrayed it in the post but you sound extremely self centred and unempathetic. I would be so hurt if after nearly getting shot my partner calls to pick a fight with me about an ig caption, also if you were in the garden and not in the crossfire like he was I don’t think it’s bad that he’s not consoling you rn, realistically you should be doing that for him.

No. 626673

>>626670

i did give him support after it happened, weeks after. he joked about it and it didn’t seem so bad on him. i’m not expecting him to be over it, but i don’t think it’s right for him to say he was targeted and that “they’re out to get him” when it clearly had nothing to do with him.

No. 626676

>>626670

samefag the shooting was months ago. i know things take time. i’m an extremely empathetic person, pick up on emotions with ease, and don’t pick fights or see things logically very often, if at all. i’m trying not to “be nice” because well it’s lolcow lol.

we’ve talked about it, i offered my support, expressed how grateful i was that nothing did happen. and the bullet would have definitely ended up close to me in the yard if the car was just a foot or two further down the road.

No. 626679

>>626676
>i’m an extremely empathetic person, pick up on emotions with ease
>i may also be upset because i was pretty close to the line of fire as well and he never consoled me or said he was grateful nothing happened to me
>i was also in my backyard when it happened
yeah ok bro, just let him get his 5 seconds of internet pity ffs

No. 626680

>>626676
> i’m an extremely empathetic person
[ X ] Doubt

No. 626688

>>626553
anon where are you getting this number from? 416,000 men might've been diagnosed with prostate cancer that year but that doesn't mean they died from it. prostate cancer is the most common cancer for men but men who have prostate cancer are statistically more likely to die WITH it than FROM it https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/press-releases/prostate-cancer-adami-epstein/

not trying to sperg out and nitpick but this is a common misconception that I see a lot. compared to other cancers prostate cancer just really isn't as fatal to those who have it.

No. 626689

>>626656
>>626676
It's weird to give someone shit when they were caught in the crossfire of a bullet regardless if they were purposefully targeted or not. The second that bullet hit his car, he became a target. I see nothing wrong with his terminology, I see you being upset that emotional energies aren't focused on you and you reacting like real life is an imageboard shitpost. Yikes girl, yikes.

No. 626690

>>626656
Anons are giving you shit, but I agree with you. It’s awful he got dragged into it, and I can understand being upset about it, but for him to try to make it seem like he was the one who was targeted weeks later is pretty fucking shitty and I have no idea why anyone would do that. If you were just a bystander, why try to turn it into a different story? That’s already terrible and would have people feeling sorry for you. His actions are bizarre.

Inb4 someone accuses me of being samefag

No. 626692

>>626676
You seem to be making the shooting more about yourself now that you suddenly got criticism for your self-centered post. Reflect on that, anon.

No. 626693

File: 1599704299590.jpeg (285.69 KB, 750x881, 1FD60B82-0008-4DFD-96D1-CA7B08…)


No. 626694

>>626690
>bystander
>bullet went through his windshield and headrest
Legitimately, how do you figure? Had he been sitting in that car when this happened and not getting something out the back, anon would be here begging us for consolation about her dead/injured bf and not the attention whoring one she thinks he's being. This is some hood shit and I don't blame him for being traumatized.

No. 626695

File: 1599704358806.jpg (25.96 KB, 407x407, 1364217491759.jpg)

I have been working for my company for 5 years now and have come up as a manager role with the senior managers taking care of the wages. I've been given an unworkable contract for over a year, had an entire departments transferred to my responsibilities before that for 8 months while they hired a dedicated person to manage that side. I managed to keep everything stable with a lot of stress and i kept on getting praise from other departments saying i'm amazing at my job.

I am being underpaid about 40% under market value though.

I've told them that i am unhappy with my current wage at the end of last year and that i was considering quitting 2 months ago and that i could get paid 1.7x my current wage at another place. They admitted that i was being underpaid and that i may get that boost at the start of this year, even when i complained about it last years.
Anyway i just found out that my employee was getting paid more than me by 9%. I'm actually feeling sick and i am ready to quit. They haven't taken my quit threats seriously while knowingly paying my fucking employees who something similar yet significantly less than what i do. There is no winning with this company, it's time to move on like i was at the start of the year.

Fucking COVID prevented me from quitting at the start of the year but i've been saving up to give myself plenty of unemployment leeway if required.

While i could act like Little Ms Victim i've just kind accepted that i've let myself be taken advantage of and I can't expect the world to play fair when it comes to evaluating hard work. The best i can do is cast a vote in the federal election.
Anyway I have about 5 weeks worth of sick leave and you bet i'm going to take a few sickies in and about 10 weeks of annual leave they will have to pay out if i quit. I never understood why so many anon's got stuck in abusive relationships but i now know how it feels. Fuck this shit, i deserve better and this shitty company needs Me a lot more than i need it.

No. 626696


No. 626698

>>626690
I kind of see what you’re saying but would you really consider literally being in the crossfire being a ‘bystander’?

No. 626699

>>626690
The man is traumatized and it's not been very long. Anyway he could be handling it better than this one isolated word of choice that anon is centered on makes it seem.

No. 626701

File: 1599704772444.gif (2.12 MB, 728x546, file.gif)

>>626695
Just wanted to commiserate and say that you're not alone.

I've been kept on hold with the company I'm working for. They keep renewing a short-term contract with me (that underpays me) for almost a year now with no timeframe of when they'll offer me direct hire. Upper management and new management I run into at meetings always tells me they've "heard great things about me" and that I do good work, but I suppose it's not enough to offer me worthy pay. Or paid sick time. Or vacation. Or health insurance. Or any semblance of human rights.

No. 626703

Genuine Question. How do you go on with life when you'd rather die right on the spot than do anything? Even the things that excite you and make you happy; death is more appealing than going on another day of being momentarily happy, if at all.

No. 626704

>>626694
If someone says they were targeted in a shooting, it has a much different connotation. It’s sounds obvious he was trying to paint a different picture than the truth, which seems to be he was at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Not saying I don’t feel for anon and her bf, but it does sound like he’s purposely obscuring the story for some reason and I get why she’d be annoyed at that.

I’m not gonna try to sway anyone, I get what you guys are saying, but I think I know how OP feels. It was already an awful situation and it’s weird for bf to misrepresent it.

No. 626705

>>626703
didn't mean for this to sound suicidal kek. Not thinking of killing myself, which actually just means I need the answer to that question even more if I have to deal with this for another 60+ years.

No. 626706

>>626703
Mostly guilt about the idea of traumatising my parents and ruining their life

No. 626708

>>626703
That's a deep question. I would say that most people who have felt that intense sense of longing for death still end up thankful they're alive at some point. It could be tomorrow, in a few months, it can take years. Treat yourself with as much kindness as possible, try to develop some positive habits, ask for help. I know it's hard though. I'm really struggling myself but I don't want my darkness to totally defeat me so I'm holding on barely for now as best I can. I hope you will too and that one day your good times will outnumber the bad.

No. 626710

>>626703
find something that you love unabashedly. no matter what anyone else thinks of it.

No. 626711

>>626703
Because I legitimately think death is terrorizing and painful. I would rather have 60+ years of sporadic happiness and experiences that give me hope that I could get more, than endure a singular moment of anguish that will render me nothing when it's over. I'll put that off for as long as I'm able and igaf you can pry my life from my cold dead hands.

No. 626715

>>626701
On the grander scale i don't see this improving naturally for many western countries. People are so focused on taking a bigger slice from the pie rather than making the pie bigger so they naturally get a bigger slice.

If i'm not going to try and change the world, I may as well just play along with how it works. It goes against every fibre in my being which is 'follow the rules and work hard' and i known in my head that i need to be more cutthroat with employment, now i believe it in my heart.

No. 626716

>>626703
I like to plan stuff, I usually think about all the things I want to do before dying, the more specific they are, the better, because even if I know they’re not necessary like paying an orchestra to make a long version of a song I like I want them and I long for them.
Yeah, I can still think “Wow, if I got murdered right now in my sleep, I wouldn’t mind” or “I hope this mild illness I got kills me” but I will long for all the things I haven’t done/got, so I won’t actively try to kill myself, I will just wait for something to kill me while listening to my unavoidable instinct that asks me to not do retarded stuff and live.

No. 626721

do men care about boob and hip size?. I read a comment on Reddit a while ago of this guy saying that he dislikes and finds rectangle/straight down women unattractive and it got a bunch of up votes and people agreeing with him. Also when anons on this site call other women refrigerators and boxy shaped i feel terribly insecure despite having a slim body and average tits.

No. 626733

>>626721
Who gives a fuck what men like. Do you really want to win over a man who would call it off with you for having smaller hips?

No. 626734

>>626733
>Who gives a fuck what men like
Exactly, but you're on lolcow, home of pickmes who accuse every woman they don't like of being a pickme

No. 626735

>>626721
men don't like anything as a whole. get u a man who says he finds you alluring.

No. 626738

>>626721
Some men do, others don’t.
Just try to love yourself and appreciate yourself more, caring about what some random scrote thinks about you might just end up making you feel unnecessarily insecure about yourself.
Try finding your good points, like how some clothes flatters your body type a lot and how you have things that makes you unique.
When you get to understand that a scrote’s/random retards on the internet’s opinion/validation is unnecessary, you get to feel like there’s less pressure than before.

No. 626757

I feel like there’s just something slightly off about me that I don’t look like a human. Like despite all their differences everyone else in the world has a unifying thing that makes them look like a person but I just don’t have it. It’s not an ugliness thing that I think other people look prettier than me, but I just feel like I’m missing something everyone else has.

No. 626758

>>626757
confidence?

No. 626769

>>626757
Honestly you're probably not as ugly as you think you are. The others anons right, you're missing confidence.

No. 626772

>>626769
It’s not that I think I’m ugly I actually really like how I look, I just think I slightly don’t look like a real person compared to everyone else. I feel this way about people conventionally way uglier than me too. Idk it’s hard to articulate.

No. 626784

File: 1599709887126.jpg (53.58 KB, 604x271, etenerally suffering.jpg)

My basil plant looks like it contracted some kind of disease so now I'm going to have to get rid of it. Despite my black thumb, it lasted two months!

At least my mint cutting is thriving…

No. 626790

>>626772
It's mental illness

No. 626793

So many pics spoilered for no reason on lc that I mindlessly click them now. I just clicked on the asshole one fuuuuuuuuuu

No. 626809

File: 1599714047559.png (175.99 KB, 324x302, a picture of me.PNG)

my assignment was due at 11:59 and when i clicked submit it turned to 12:00
great

No. 626810

>>626809
it was such a good analysis too uGH. i hope prof is a sweetie and cuts me some slack

No. 626813

File: 1599715001598.jpg (113.99 KB, 1300x956, sad-woman-crying-and-a-friend-…)

>>626793
it's okay anon i fell for that one twice

No. 626824

File: 1599720681488.gif (2.82 MB, 500x264, 9f426350-cb2b-4309-b3b0-019856…)

I'm stressed as fuck and feel like crying. I had to lock the dog into the shed because we're having workers over to repair the roof and there is no other place for the dog since we also own cats that like to hide in the house. I feel so so so guilty.

My father, who is retired and usually spends 80% of his time is in the hospital, and idk if he'll even come back. Mother is still recovering from surgery she had a while ago so she can't handle him and my brother is scared of the dog. Idk what he did to him but the dog visibly dislikes him and males in general. I'm at work and can't leave so I'm at the edge constantly and feel like utter shit.

I'll get him a nice treat during lunch break so I can give it to him once I'm back and spend some extra time with him.

I just want things to go back to normal.

No. 626830

>>626809
That's why you should always submit at 11:58 at the latest.

No. 626832

>>626824
I'm sorry anon that's a lot to have on yr plate. Sending you virtual hugs

No. 626845

>>626809
>>626830
That's why you should always aim to submit asssignments a few hours early or even the night before.

My uni uses an online submitting system that automatically closes at 12:00 (or whatever the deadline is). Professors keep repeating to us that they can't help us if you didn't submit it by 11:59 even if you had technical difficulties and that you should submit early to be safe, yet there's always, without fail, dumbasses who thought they'd be okay submitting it at the very last moment and then end up screwig themselves over.

No. 626846

>>622700
Maybe you're HSP

No. 626852

File: 1599725876844.gif (218.07 KB, 500x280, penguinknitred.gif)

i realized that i've been knitting for over a decade and became really good at it (whatever that means–fast/accurate? advanced techniques? even stitches? making things that aren't ugly? idk how to quantify it), but it feels like… a kind of lame thing to know a lot about and spend so much time on. i don't tell anyone about it lol. i make pretty things that take weeks but at the end of the day, it's just a nice pair of socks and the craftsmanship is unappreciated.

i need knitting friends who care about my socks i guess

No. 626857

>>626852
this is probably not the reply you expected/wanted but have you thought about maybe volunteer-knitting with some elderly people? My grandmother is in a carehome and she loves knitting. My mom sometimes just spends an afternoon knitting with her and it's such a delight for my grandmother. I bet there's a lot of elderly women in carehomes with little to do who'd love to just sit and knit with someone over a cup of tea and they can appreceite the craftmanship because they were taught knitting as little girls.

No. 626859

>>626852
Haha I feel you anon I've been crocheting for a few years now and all my friends call it my grandma hobby. Otherwise they like it when I gift them amigurumis on their birthdays so that's cool. I don't think people would find your hobby lame, most of the people who found out I crochet actually asked me to teach them how to do it.
Also props to you for learning how to knit, I've been aching to knit myself a pair of socks but I seem to be unable to knit at all.

No. 626860

My awful father in law brough me a tiny kitten this evening that some asshole gave him. No prior notice. I had to run to ask relatives for kitten food because I didn't have anything for him and stores were already closed due to the quarantine schedule.
They said he's 8 weeks old but judging by his teeth and size he's clearly not older than 5 weeks and in really bad shape, very lethargic with a bad eye infection.
The pandemic is hitting hard in my country atm so the earliest I could get a vet appointment is in 10 more hours, and that after explaining that it was an emergency situation.
I haven't slept and i can't sleep. I don't want anything to happen to this little baby. This in law is such an asshole that he wanted to give him a bath right away because he has fleas. And wanted to feed him solely highly seasoned garlic chicken (from dinner leftovers) and laughed at me when I told him cats shouldn't eat garlic (of course I didn't let him feed the kitten any bullshit).
Also he doesn't believe kitten formula is real (or needed for newborn kittens). When he heard me ask the vet if I should be getting some kitten formula my in law was literally baffled as if I was crazy.
The kitten is in a warm room and has eaten a bit and drank plenty of water but he hasn't peed (nor pooped) at all in at least 8 hours and is very lethargic.
I know it sounds dumb but i'm beyond heartbroken for the suffering this tiny creature has gone through and I want it to survive and give it the absolute best life a cat can have.

No. 626863

>>626860
Your post moved me so much anon, you sound like a great kitty mom and I hope everything goes well, I wish you and your kitten best of luck.

No. 626871

>>626852
no way! i would really love to get good at knitting, maybe if you want to you could try looking into tapestries! there's this artist i follow that makes the cutest ones: https://seagullsandturtledoves.tumblr.com/tagged/knitting
i think your hobby is cool anon!

No. 626872

One week at my mom's alone and I think I'm going mad.
On the good side I lost 3kg in a few days from not eating at all. Wasn't even tempted and it's like food has become an alien thing I don't care about. Yay for bupropion.
I guess I'll be at least skinnier by the time this torture ends,so that's the silverlining.

No. 626873

Venture Bros was cancelled. There's no update on Rune Factory 5. No Story of Seasons that isn't a spin off or remake. I can't take it anons!!!

No. 626886

>>626873
TGS is coming soon! So there is a chance RF news are dropping soon!

No. 626887

I hate how I look, I have no redeeming features everything is disgusting. I hate to be so vain and conceited, I know beauty is skin deep and I preach that also I don't have any deformity so I feel so ungrateful for hating my face this much but god I detest it. I wish I could wear a paper bag over my head everyday honestly. I'm considering suicide because I can't stand to be looked at which is so selfish and vain but I get a feeling of dread and terror everytime I realise someone has to see the monstrosity that is my face. I'm so so disgusting.

No. 626891

>>626887
girl if pnp can afford to get her entire face remodeled so can you. in seriousness though consider some therapy

No. 626893

File: 1599737848787.gif (5.34 MB, 480x262, giphy.gif)

So I went to a meetup yesterday and it sort of reinforced my feelings that I'm missing something fundamental that everyone else has. It's not even one thing, its several things. Normal people have motivation, goals, a desire to live and and I'm jut sort of….a bag of skin and organs without a personality that just sort of…exists?? floats through life?? Additionally, all the other people had a lot to say, whereas whenever I opened up my mouth to speak, the words came out all jumbled and my voice was all strained and weak and I got the usual 'speak up please, we can't hear you' thing that all introverts are familiar with. Also it made me realize how…unconsciously I live life, it makes sense? Like all these people had reasons to do all kinds of things and I just do things because…I don't know. I just do things. I guess I need to reflect more?
It's funny because for the longest time I believed that the only deficit I have is my lack of social skills but this meeting realized that I lack much more than that. Motivation, warmth, liveliness, optimism, God knows what more. This is a truly retarded metaphor but it felt like I was Pinocchio surrounded by real, actual, flesh humans and I just want to become like them, I just don't know fucking howwww

No. 626898

>>626893
hard relate

No. 626900

>>626893
You sound like you're in a rut and I say this because I'm only slowly pulling myself out of one. I use to love being social and now I'm anti social due to fear and embarrassment mostly. I don't feel like I have anything worthy to add to others which is insecurity and low self esteem on my part. I've been soul searching heavily the past two weeks because I'm tirrd of feeling defective. I think to feel content with others I have to feel content with myself and not ashamed/embarrassed. So I'm working on myself, so I don't feel awkward around others. As I said I too have been in a rut and it's completely sapped my motivation. I'm unemployed and due to the pandemic have been allowing it to slow me down and not try as hard as I should be because I'm like, what's the point? But there is a point. I feel like shit, I feel lazy and I feel like a shit tier person. Only way to fix it is to sort myself out and start applying for jobs etc. Maybe there's something you know you should be doing?

No. 626901

>>626860
People really act like pets in general are, idk, objects or some shit you can just replace, especially cats.

I hope all goes well anon

No. 626906

>>626900
nta but what if i've been like this my whole life

No. 626907

File: 1599740298332.jpeg (88.39 KB, 200x300, 200.jpeg)

My retarded lactose intolerant self after binging on 4 bowls of cereal with whole milk kek

fuck me anons, will I ever stop shitting?

No. 626913

>>622665
I’m thinking of leaving that meme site. The users there have pushed way too many buttons and I don’t want to co-exist with people who dismiss the idea that women are just exaggerating their experiences on catcalling and harassment.

I’ve been doing it for Twitter and I’m doing the same for that site.

No. 626917

I'm growing more distant from my bf and as I do it, I can see just how bullshit it is.

So he made a mistake. Not a huge deal (it's just some timekeeping issues on his part), but he's made the same one a few times and the resolution is it was on me to make sure he does the thing because I'm the one who cares about it. OK. So this time I DO X thing, I give him the reminder and the mistake still happens, so I'm annoyed as I was before and I calmly (and I mean it!) explain why I'm annoyed.

His reaction? I should do Y thing on top of that to make sure. It's not a big deal to do Y, so why am I upset? I tell him he could be more considerate and try not actually make the mistake and his reaction is HE WALKS AWAY.

At this point like I said, I'm more distant so I don't chase as I used to, it's a predictable response. I wait and he comes back, tells me it's not fair on him and why is it so hard to just do Y.

Cue me trying to explain I shouldn't go 100% to manage his mistakes and he's SO ANGRY, like he's literally shaking in anger and I'm just confused tbh. What have I done to be the target of such strong emotions? I just asked him to be more mindful. He storms off AGAIN and I'm asking him to come back to talk it through (I haven't raised my voice, I let him speak and didn't interrupt so I didn't antagonise him further) and he's shouting "NO" over and over while walking off.

At this point I'm really confused as to why he's so fucking mad. I wait a bit and approach, ask him why he's so so angry and let him know I just want him to put thought into fixing frequent mistakes instead of blaming me. He goes into all of this hyperbole and yelling eg. "so I'm supposed to never make a mistake again then?" "if you know what I should do to fix it why don't you just tell me?" "this is bullshit it was a small thing" etc etc.

It's just stunning to me because it feels like he blew what could've just been "you're right, I'll try be more mindful" into a full on meltdown when all I could've done to aggravate it is hold my stance that he should make an effort not to make that mistake. And when I cared more I used to be super upset that he'd walk away and chase him and explain my (what I think is reasonable) viewpoint while he uses reductive arguments like I stated above and I'm trying to bat them away while restating my core point until I'm so emotionally exhausted I take an "I'm sorry your feelings were hurt" and move on.

But this time I had more emotional resilience because I didn't chase, and I was surprised to see such unbridled anger as his defence mechanism when the usual didn't work. IDK I always thought I was too emotional and sensitive even if my points were valid, but his reaction this time has me rethinking it. I mean hell even if my request was unreasonable, his reaction still would've been super weird today.

No. 626918

Got myself a pixie cut and now I look like a fat gimpgirl555 down to the same hair color.
Never considered using wigs until now.

No. 626920

>>626917
He was angry because you asked him to be accountable. And how dare you ask men to do that and not mommy them instead, lol.
I really hope you don't stay with such a manipulative loser.

No. 626922

>>626917
And I want to add that through him getting madder he never once acknowledged that he could take some responsibility and try not make the mistake. He maintained with asking if I expect him to never make a mistake, me doing Y isn't much bother etc. And I'd say like "yeah doing Y isn't much bother but also…you could do something?".

It was a bit scary because his face was all scrunched up, hands balled up into fists, I could see the muscles on his arms flexed, he was talking through his teeth. And in my head I was like "whoa, chill".

venting here because idk that was such a stupid, thoughtless reaction on his part.

>>626920
Yeah, I'm applying like mad for well paying positions to live on my own atm. Until then it's something to put in the back of my mind. It's just the difference in reaction when I wasn't desperately clinging to his distancing was eye opening.

>>626918
Wigs have so much variety anon. Sometimes I wonder if I should shave entirely and just have a different style so I never get bored. If you are seriously considering it, I think it'll pay off! Also I'm sure nobody cares so much about your hair as you do.

No. 626923

>>626690
>>626704

this is exactly what i was getting at. the shooting WAS traumatic and awful. but i can also question why did he need to lie to himself and to others about what happened? it doesn’t matter if it was a social media post or word of mouth through our friends, it’s the simple fact that he’s purposefully skewing the story to fit his “so smart the government is out to kill me” self-made narrative when he was actually just caught in the middle of a hood shooting.

No. 626924

>>626917
Can you elaborate on what Y and X thing is? It's kind of a confusing read.

No. 626927

>>626923
He probably doesn't lie to himself; traumatic experiences like this can warp your reality so it wouldn't surprise me if he actually thinks that he was targeted. It will most likely pass sooner or later.

>>626656
Anon, I understand your frustration but this was very traumatising for him and he's probably not thinking clearly, cut him some slack.
>i may also be upset because i was pretty close to the line of fire as well and he never consoled me or said he was grateful nothing happened to me, etc. idk.
This is what got me tho. Makes you sound pretty self-absorbed.

No. 626929

Women who have children with abusers in this day and age really piss me off. It's like don't come whining to the internet when your child is older and resents you for reproducing with an absentee person that you're too embarrassed to tell the truth about cause you know you fucked up.

No. 626932

>>626929
This. My mom got with my father who is an abusive piece of shit and never accepted that he is one of the reasons I have various mental issues and blames it on my own self. It was until a police told her that she enabled his abuse, that she realized that she fucked up but even then, she says it was just ''a mistake'' and started to whine about ''the past is the past'' and that she just made a mistake. I deeply resent her for that.

No. 626939

>>626900
>I have to feel content with myself
Yes! I've come to the same conclusion, I have to change a lot of beliefs that I have about myself and life. Especially unlearning learned helplessness. I've always had this very passive attitude to life - university, friendships, jobs - they all just sort of happened to me. I have to force myself to believe that I'm an active participant in my own life. I also have become unemployed recently (today, actually) so I really have to get my shit together
>I'm like, what's the point?
I relate to this soo hard. I felt like an alien listening to other people during the meetup listing things on their bucket list, wanting to do this and that and I was thinking the same…what's the point. I think we have to force ourselves to believe that life is meaningful. I actually just realized that the passivity might actively reinforce the idea that life is meaningless…how could I value something that just happens and I don't feel like I control it?
I think we should take baby steps out of our comfort zone to gain momentum and then do the big, difficult steps. Good luck to you anon!

No. 626941

File: 1599744559143.jpg (9.23 KB, 168x200, toilet monster.jpg)

>>626907
Oh god, reading this made me have a flashback of that time when I forgot to take my lactose enzymes and necked down two lattes before work. Needless to say I spent 4 of my 8 working hours in the bathroom, alternating between shitting, throwing up and crying from the pain. Hang in there, anon, it's going to pass

No. 626942

>>626929
Spent three years in a relationship where I was sucked in thinking he was amazing and then it all fell south as soon as I was isolated and dependant.. I was real good about taking my birth control and then I talked him into finally getting that vasectomy he was always talking about getting someday .. his next gf had four kids from previous relationships so I guess I didn't save any kids from him technically, like I'd wanted to.

No. 626945

>>623597
I disliked this stupid movie enough to reply to a 5 day old post. The premise was interesting but I couldn't stop laughing at the ballet scene. For the most part though, it was just overly pretentious. If I wanted to navel-gazeI could do it for free and without the assistance of a 2 hour mess of convoluted-to-the-point-of-being-unintelligible symbolism.

No. 626946

>>626929
Yeah. But I don't know why we're supposed to hate the woman instead of the abuser. I used to resent my mom too, but I got over it.

No. 626950

>>626946
When men reach a certain threshold in terms of their 'assholery' we apparently just switch over to blaming the women around him, ie the other victims

No. 626961

File: 1599746990490.jpeg (252.5 KB, 2000x1123, B186AECE-DBB6-478D-A2C5-FD31A0…)

I’m packing up my car right now, getting ready to evacuate and leave everything behind. There is an alpaca farm next to me and I don’t think the neighbors will have enough trailers to take them all… it literally looks like an apocalyptic wasteland here. I know when I return (if I do) it will no longer be the beautiful green place I grew up in and loved. I’m just feeling lots of things right now.

I hope 2021 is better.

No. 626964

>>626929
I guess it depends on the circumstances. Some are too naive, some may see it as a solution, others are conditioned to victimhood subconsciously or consciously.

No. 626971

File: 1599747640829.png (408.19 KB, 800x450, osbeyaocp.png)

>>626961
godspeed, anon

No. 626973

>>626950
I almost never see people complaining if their dad got married to a abusive bitch of a woman

No. 626974

Ever since I got out of an on and off relationship with a narcissist, I can't feel anything at all. I tried meeting new people but no one can give me the same feeling he did. I am addicted to the trauma bond I had with him and I am afraid he ruined me. I just want to feel again.

No. 626977

>>626974
I have been in a similar situation anon you will eventually move on it will just take time eventually you will feel again

No. 626982

>>626946
Hate is too strong of a word. I don't think any outsiders actually hate abused women. But–and this is a big but–their kids have every right to feel how they do. It's a crock when those women pretend like they don't understand why they don't have good relationships with their kids even though they feel entitled to one due to the shit they put up with or sacrificed because of their abuser. Just look at what this anon >>626932 went through.
It's terrible to grow up being gaslit by a parent in your life, only to find out later that the reason why your life played out as it did is because one parent made the wrong choices, and the other was a piece of shit. There's empathy to go around there, but ultimately the child is the innocent one who didn't do shit to deserve that suffering so there's definitely accountability to go around as well.

>>626942
You tried your best anon, you did the right thing. A guy like that would be super dangerous if he had reproductive capabilities, you did the world a service.

>>626973
Tons of people have daddy/stepmom issues, you're being selectively blind.

No. 626986

I think my brother and I turned out narcissists from having a narc mother, or at least self-centered psychos. It makes me really sad because we will probably both die alone and disappoint our parents, I wish at least one of us had turned out right

No. 626999

I have a D&D group with a bunch of friends. The other day one of the members asked if her "friend" could join in on our next session. I found that weird because our campaign isn't necessarily beginner-friendly but said sure, why not. Turns out said friend is the dude she's been trying to fuck for like the last 3+ years. I mean girl you want this man to be sexually attracted to you and the course of action you take is to invite him to a dungeons & dragons session??? Kek

No. 627005

>>626982
>It's terrible to grow up being gaslit by a parent in your life, only to find out later that the reason why your life played out as it did is because one parent made the wrong choices, and the other was a piece of shit
I feel this, but then I also see that one of my parents (the abusive one) grew up being beaten by his parents and molested by a priest so I know that unhealthy parents just create an endless cycle of more unhealthy parents. I'm just not having kids myself. I have no faith that I can escape the cycle otherwise.

No. 627006

>>626986
i think you'd find that many children of narcs feel broken in this way. your mom probably taught you a lot of unhealthy behaviors, but please don't lose hope! you recognize that it's affected you, and i think with some work (either alone or with a professional if/when you're ready) you can reduce those behaviors and replace them with healthy ones. the outcome doesn't have to be bleak.

No. 627011

>>627005
I think what you're doing is noble if you really don't feel you're cut out for it given your upbringing. Yet I think the children raised by unhealthy parents can sometimes make the best parents granted they are self-aware of their upbringing and strive to be better than how they were raised. The problem becomes when adult children of unhealthy parents have the mentality like if they survived a shitty childhood, then that means they don't have to give their own children better cause they will turn out "fine" like they did.

No. 627015

I know I'm not pretty enough for most guys to want to date but I am pretty enough for them to come back and try to fuck. The thing is I'm not even nice to these men, I call them ugly, have bpd freakouts, tell them that they're shit in bed, point out all their flaws for no reason…so I'm not even the kind of pick me who guys can just have an easy fuck session with before they go back to chasing stacy.It takes a few months before they get tired of me being a psychopath before they fuck off. Its interesting how men will put up with a woman with a deplorable personality and on top of it they arent even that physically attracted to just for pussy lol. All of these guys are younger and better looking than me too, this is why I show no respect to men because they're all just desperate pussy hounds. Idk why women put them on such a high pedestal

No. 627022

>>627015
>interesting how men will put up with a woman with a deplorable personality and on top of it they arent even that physically attracted to just for pussy
Everyone knows this, men have no standards. You however should. Stop it, get some help.

No. 627024

>>627022
I have but men from back when I was spiraling still try to contact me for sex/attention even though I was awful lol

Ya know you can meet a man 3 years ago and he will just pop up randomly. They never really go away.

No. 627031

>>627015
>I know I'm not pretty enough for most guys to want to date but I am pretty enough for them to come back and try to fuck.
I'm dead ass not saying this to make you feel better: Men will fuck and marry anyone. Stop treating male behavior as if it's a reflection upon yourself. It's not.

I know lolcow isn't the best because of the platitudes the resident teenagers and mental invalids say like being prettier will make men treat you better (LOL), but you would do well to realize that men have no fucking standards. They just want you to believe they do so you'll jump through hoops being the best version of yourself for them, meanwhile they can carry on with their unwashed asses and emotionally unavailable antics. Men treat you the way they do because they know they can get away with it as you mentally are now. Your low self-esteem and lack of confidence is like blood in the water to their shark asses. So start ghosting them. Tell them no. Make them chase you. Have them spend their money and effort on you because at the end of the day you're what they want, and they go nuts without women unless they're fags milking each other's prostate.

Start believing it.

No. 627032

>>627024
I got rid of kik, viber and some other apps a few years back for that reason. They otherwise never stop reaching out to you

No. 627034

>>627031
When I was at my worse mentally I came to this conclusion because even when I was an awful person, sleeping on a dirty mat on the floor, there were still cute guys trying to fuck me. So, in a weird way that showed me how pathetic/desperate men are.

No. 627035

>>627024
Glad to hear you’re not a dumb bitch bpdchan anymore, never forget how shit men are

No. 627046

>>627015
>>627031
What does it mean if no men want to fuck me?
The aura I give off must be horrifying. Good.

Also grats to anon for getting hold of your mental health. That said, those men deserved whatever abuse you hurled at them since they tried to take advantage of an unstable woman. Shits.

No. 627051

>>627046
Maybe you just don't look like someone who can be duped and gaslit into serving them for nothing.

No. 627054

oh my god did this tard start texting me dry as fuck because i told him to keep some boundaries? i know he agrees with the boundaries but any piece of criticism makes him feel almost comically bad. i still can't wrap my head around it.

just reply to my dumb twitter memes!!! i didn't say i hate you!!! god

No. 627076

>>627054
Males generally see no use for a woman who doesn’t want to fuck them, anon. Welcome to earth & I’m sorry you’re being treated this way

No. 627078

>>627054
Yes he did, men can keep up this appearance of “wokeness” (gag) with women, but as soon as one calls them out or tries to enforce things they “agree with” like you with boundaries, they can’t admit they’re wrong. It’s not you, it’s males. My dumbass bf does this.

No. 627109

Someone my bf worked with just tested positive for covid. Ugh…

No. 627116

>>627054
Kek I had a friend like this a while ago. Kept texting me inappropriate sex stuff, I told him to knock it off. Got a "fine I'll only text you about the weather" type reply, said he wouldn't respond to anything else because "it's too hard to be appropriate around beautiful girls, I might say the wrong thing."

It's just a sad bit men do for pity to make you question yourself. "Oh no, was I being too hard on him?" No, you were not. Block and forget.

No. 627117

>>627054
>>627116
honestly I'd rather them do this because it's better than finding out they are shit later.

No. 627124

>>627116
this is about my ex. when he's drunk he texts me flirty stuff (like, the kind of stuff someone would send to try and test the waters if they had never dated) and he even sent me a song that was about a painful break up etc. he has only drunk texted me two or three times but i saw a pattern forming. i just told him to not use alcohol as an excuse to conveniently "forget" we're both trying to move on.

when we were together i could never tell if he was actually upset or pretending. i don't know how he was raised so non-confrontational where he's from. i've met some sensitive doormats before but he really brings it on a different level, geez.

ps i might be overthinking his texts but i'm just so over non-confrontational people who think they can go their whole lives without a single negative comment simply because they personally wouldn't say anything negative to anyone. grow a pair!!!!

No. 627138

>>626555
The good news is that I talked to him and he's okay with me getting a platinum band if it makes me happy. He just wants whatever will make me happy. So huzzah.
>>626588
You were right anon, I was worried over nothing. Is that pic the ring you got? It's lovely.

No. 627139

>>627124
You're overthinking it, anon. He's breadcrumbing you. You don't need him to reply to your dumb twitter memes or anything else.

No. 627179

I fucking left my debit card in a drive up ATM today FUCK. I have my banks app so I was able to report and replace it as soon as I realized but i'm still kicking myself for doing something so fucking stupid. I'm usually so careful about that kind of thing.

No. 627180

>>627179
At least you're not my alcoholic mother who put her card in an ATM to take $40 out of her account in cash, only to remove the card once the transaction was done, leave the $40, and drive off.

No. 627183

I miss 2016/2017 so much

No. 627199

File: 1599764516943.png (3.64 MB, 2278x970, Ameiurus_melas_by_Duane_Raver.…)

Found out someone has been catfishing creeps on 4chan with my pictures and its time for a social media purge and getting a different haircut and color.

Im so fucking terrified of getting Bianca Devins-ed for something I didn't even fucking do why are people like this?

I don't even have that big of a following just a small art account (16k) where i post selfies sometimes to keep engagement up, I hate this and I fucking hate the internet.

No. 627233

>>627199
Please be careful anon, you’re right to be leery and it isn’t paranoid at all to do all of this, given the track record of incels. I’m sorry this has happened to you, hope it isn’t someone doing it to you on purpose.

No. 627242

>>627233

The worst part is that the person was pretending to be 𝗺𝗲, they used every information i posted in passing like my college and major when people asked where I got my formal training in art, my name, photos i would post just lazying around with no make up, my country, its just fucking terrifying.

And then I get some weirdo in my DMs acting like they know me demanding to know why I stopped talking with them on discord.

I never felt so fucking violated.

No. 627244

>>627242
I hope you’ve replied to those dms explicitly stating it’s a catfish, and from the sounds of it someone who may know you might have done it, maybe a man. I’d be wary for a bit. I would make a disclaimer statement in whatever few socials you have, such and such are my only accounts and I do not use ___ or ____, whatever platforms are being used to catfish. Nip it in the bud.

No. 627249

>>627183
wtf no, that was the worst time ever, pre 2016 was a golden age

No. 627257

>>627249
I feel 2018 was around the time it started going downhill

No. 627260

what the fuck was up with those teachers from childhood who only wanted to see certain students fail? these bitches would make up reasons to punish me, and retaliated when i wouldn't stand for it. and in contrast, the teachers that truly supported me were the ones who inspired academic passions in me that i otherwise detested. they accepted me as the defiant girl i was and worked with it, instead of stifling it. fuck those angry old cunts who hate children who refuse to be submissive to their power complex.

No. 627263

>>627260
K-12 teachers are a special breed of incompetent. If they're not like this, they're just uncomfortably bad at their job and overstep boundaries with students, like talking about their personal problems in the middle of class, crying in front of students, etc.

No. 627279

>>627260
Tons of personality-disordered people become teachers precisely for the fact that they are granted authority over children which is the only opportunity they'll ever get in life to flex power.

My mother was a middle school teacher and I had the treat of being her daughter and seeing what an unstable, narcissistic control freak that she was at home firsthand.
Looking back, she didn't have her shit together at all.

No. 627287

This is extremely dumb but I'm visiting my parents and saw a bunch of pictures of me when I was a toddler and burst into tears.
That happy little girl didn't know what sort of shit life would throw at her. I looked so happy and full of life and now I'm a depressed gray blob due to abuse and mental health issues.
And what if I had killed myself years ago? Would my mom look at those same pictures in anguish?

No. 627296

>>627287
When I was a teen I attempted suicide for the first time but before I did I made sure to destroy every childhood photo of myself, jad a similar moment to what you describe. I don't think it's dumb. You can only repress shit so much.

No. 627369

>>627279
I agree with this theory. It's also not at all hard to become a K-12 teacher. The job is always in high demand and all you need to qualify is a bachelor's and a teaching credential you can earn in like 3 months. I have the "edgy" opinion that people in this field don't deserve the higher wages they're always whining and protesting about. You did the absolute bare minimum to get this job, why should you make more than someone who has a master's or higher in a specified field, and has spent years or even decades harnessing their skills? My mom actually makes quite a bit more than the average elementary school teacher and still has the gall to bitch to me that she somehow deserves more money. She was showing up to class hungover for 50% of her career ffs, and her colleagues that she gossips about constantly apparently aren't much better.

No. 627387

>>627369
Do you know what you're talking about? A teaching certificate cannot be earned in 3 months.. A teaching license requires at least a bachelor in education or a bachelor and 2 years of an education masters. A semester of student teaching and a huge and rigorous portfolio that costs 400 dollars to submit. This is the norm in most states within America today. It takes a lot to become a teacher today, I've seen my family members go through hell trying to get their license and honestly, in most states they are most definitely not being paid enough. Teachers who give even a morsel of a shit end up taking work home, coming to school early/staying later to go to bullshit meetings with parents/other teachers. People who sit in an office chair get paid more and even admit that they don't do shit throughout the day.

No. 627393

>>627387
Listen, wanna hear something that'll blow your mind?
There are elementary school teachers in other countries too.

No. 627399

>>627369
NTA . Kek I know you hate your mom and hated your teachers but it really isn’t that simple to get or maintain a teaching degree. Maybe in whatever country you’re in but I’ve lived in North America , Europe , and the Middle East and the requirements were intense and the pay was shit.

No. 627400

My bf won't stop wasting money on Onlyfans but got mad at me for having a Big Meaty Cocks folder on my phone??

No. 627402

>>627400
Kek good copypasta

No. 627403

>>627393
Can you say what country you're talking about? Because at this point I'm genuinely curious and would like to know what country hires teachers using those standards.

No. 627478

I love my bf and he's perfect and intelligent but it drives me insane that he wants to learn my native language and repeatedly tells me to teach him when he has the miraculous invention of the World Wide Web right at his fingertips !

No. 627482

>>627478
He’s probably trying to bond with you anon… Tell him to learn grammar on his own and you can help him with conversational

No. 627499

I put in a lot of effort Into a sock/cat fish to follow my own personal lolcows and some other cows and I lost the password. Instagram logged me out of all my accounts so I lost another hobby based one as well.
I never interacted with the cows just followed them with occasional liking of photos but since it was a pet insta (from a male friend who doesn’t do social media) I Interacted with a lot of other dog and pet accounts as if it was my own dog. I got legit and new content frequently too. I was also suppose to give him the password but I forgot the password before I gave it to him.

No. 627569

>>627499
I wish I could ask you to stalk some people for me with your sock kek

No. 627589

I want more girls to be friends with so desperately. I'm starting to hate men more and more and now one of my guy acquaintances just discovered the song Scott Pilgrim ruined a generation of girls and won't stop listening to it, he will probably find MGTOW forums and start shitting on women next week.

No. 627617


No. 627656

I have this visceral memory as a child of being at the park with a girl a year or two younger than me. She told me a teenage boy had raped her, and then this boy's white trash family pulled up in a van along the street and started yelling at her from inside the vehicle, calling her a whore and a slut and all sorts of heinous shit. I'm not even joking, she must have been 7 at the youngest. They thought instead of dealing with their fucked up son that they should instead harass a little girl when no adults were around. I wish I could remember who the family was so I could look them up and maybe fuck with them a little. I'm just so disgusted.

No. 627685

A good friend of mine has a really dysfunctional family and her mental health is constantly in and out of the toilet because of it. Her mom in particular is a narcissistic piece of shit who has been manipulating her since she came out of the womb. None of us can convince her to cut ties with them, even though she knows that they're awful people and will probably never change. I'm just so frustrated watching her suffer like this and I don't understand what it is that keeps her so loyal to them. They treat her horribly. It makes me fucking sick.

No. 627686

i live in a shiiiiiiitty student area in shitty accommodation and i have to put up with stupid drunk high dickheads outside singing and shouting all NIGHT. just wanna open my window and tell the stupid drunk bitches singing outside rn to shut the fuck up because it’s 3am but i know i shouldn’t. do we exist just to suffer?

No. 627695

I feel bad because earlier a drinking glass fell off the counter and broke, I thought I swept and vacuumed all the glass but I got a text later in the day that there was blood on the floor. There was no one around besides the two cats, and I didn’t have any cuts so one of them might have gotten cut by a shard. They were both acting normal when I got back from work but the blood was definitely paw print shaped

No. 627702

Another anon made me remember my time at a very, highly and awfully weird and gross daycare and all the abuse that went on. Feels like a movie or some shit in my head and I feel fucking guilty for being too tired to convince my mom to let me just go home after school.

No. 627712

Browsing Netflix. First thing that appears in the popular section is Cuties, the pedo movie.

All this outrage yet people still give that shit views. I genuinely thought people wouldn't watch it. Just the thought of thousands of men watching it right now out of ''curiosity''.. Fucking hell. It's feels reeal fucking weird knowing that you're browsing through jailbait child model shit when looking for a movie to watch.

No. 627713

>>627712
If you would actually watch it, you'd realize that there is nothing "pedophilic" in the movie. Sometimes it's better to see what a piece of media actually consists of instead of relying on Twitter to tell you what to dislike about it.

No. 627721

Thinking about how the last words I ever said to the English teacher I had a crush on in high school was "I hope so" after he said "See you around." In hindsight, I definitely sounded like a complete dumbass and I didn't even realize I had a crush on him until after I graduated ffs.

No. 627735

>>627713
> there is nothing "pedophilic" in the movie

Except for all of the pedophilic stuff in the movie.

No. 627736

>>627713
Nta but I stumbled across a scene in which all the girls are performing on a stage for their families? With clothes that barely cover them and twerking… I know the documentary is to actually spark the conversation on the sexualization of kids but doing it by sexualizing kids it's clearly not it. I feel so bad for those little girls, because they truly are fucking young and are being used by a filmmaker who is more interested in causing shock and generate revenue than actually spreading awareness.

No. 627743

>>627702
I'm sorry that happened to you anon. Now I'm thankful my mom was paranoid of daycare and babysitters and the like.

No. 627744

>>627721
I mean, depending on the tone of how you said it I don’t think that’s a totally embarrassing thing to say

No. 627753

>>627713
you'd realize that there is nothing "pedophilic" in the movie
Just saw it.
>little girls watch a stripper expose her breast
>little girl puts a condom in her mouth and inflates it like a balloon
>main character takes a photo of her vagina and posts it online
>main character steals her relative's phone and tries to apologise by acting sexual with him
>little girls dance and twerk on stage in front of masses of clapping adults, lots of crotch and ass close ups
>main character gets her shorts pulled down, revealing her underwear
>little girls twerk on a policeman
Just shut the fuck up, I bet you're French or something

No. 627754

I’m drinking alcohol adult beverage
Im rewatching death note
It’s alright

No. 627765

>>627736
>>627753
this. the movie isn't even filmed in a way that makes those scenes uncomfortable. it feels like the film maker wants to promote a message but also doesn't mind making it pedobait shit.

No. 627780

I stare at spreadsheets for 12 hours a day yet but because I live with my parents and everything is closed down it doesnt bother me
What am I missing out on? shitposting here?

No. 627783

>>627744
Unfortunately, my tone came off incorrectly and it basically sounded like I was desperate to see him again. I knew immediately after I said it. He chuckled, which tells me he picked up on it too. Thankfully, I won't be seeing him again after all.

No. 627784

>>627753
This. Repzion's a fag but he made a video about a pedophile community he found online… and I bet you can guess what movie they were discussing in disgusting detail. I highly doubt the instances you listed weren't included to attract pedophiles and normalise the sexualisation or children. People who say otherwise seem to be trying to cope extra hard with the fact this is the reality we live in.

No. 627796

Why the fuck is my city opening up gyms before restaurants? I wanna go back to work.

No. 627798

People who say they don't understand something just show they don't bother to think about things from different perspectives. It's intellectual laziness. You can learn to understand why something happens while disagreeing with it.

No. 627815

I'm the oldest of 7 kids and we grew up poor and in a really fucked up situation/family. I have had 5/6 of my siblings admit they think about suicide. 2 have made attempts but are ok. I don't know how to navigate this. I struggle too and have no idea how to help. I want to cry for them that I am their biggest source of comfort even though I feel like I was such a shitty sister and they deserve so much better. I wish I could fix everything. Also if everyone could please wish bad things on my mom tonight that would be cool. I hate that bitch.

No. 627817

File: 1599810077510.jpg (14.09 KB, 360x203, IMG_20200909_153437.jpg)

Tfw I can't seem to find friends to play competitive games because as soon as I mention that I am taken, half of them drift away from me. When it comes to girls, it's usually the one whom I'd meet around one of those "friends" and she'd always see me as a threat.

I just want to play ranked with some good, reliable people… Come on. I miss when this now dead game was popular.

No. 627818

>>627817
I remember when I'd play overwatch and the guys would leave when I said i wasn't single or they'd begin critiquing my partner??? and the girls would just be so loud and annoying and be quite aggressive towards me whilst being ''uwu'' with the guys. It was so annoying I just quit and now I play single-player games where I don't have to interact with any weirdos.

No. 627819

>>627817
God this shit makes me so glad I have a good group of irl older friends who are all married that play the same games as me. I remember the those days though anon

No. 627822

>>627818
This!! I am literally talking about OW, too. Everytime there'd be a woman like that it'd be either the one who would be passive aggro while always having uwu voice either some other fake pandering shit. Out of playing in many groups I have met only two nice women, which were:
A british lesbian Moira main who had an amazing sense of humor and I loved playing w her, sucks how our whole group got disbanded bc people got bored of playing;
A nice hitscan main that I met through steam recently from other EU country, she is a super sweet lady.

I remember the other day I had to encounter a 27yo Mercy main who would keep failing but still trying to have a high pitched voice and pretend to be all fragile, and whenever I'd say something she would for some odd reason sound even louder and make her pitch higher.

Honestly, out of desperation I even tried looking on 4chan to play, but OW /vg/ thread is nothing but people talking about how much they want to fuck x character and other waifuposting.
I do not want to try finding people on Discord again, because I feel like as if finding any1 on Discord is a doomed place, considering my experience I wrote earlier.
Doesn't seem like reddit is a good place either.

No. 627823

>>627024
Nobody forces you to reply to them.

No. 627825

>>627478
He probably wants to do it with you since he loves you too.

No. 627826

>>627822

Why do you hate women so much?

No. 627831

>>627736
It's not the film maker who wants to shock and bait people, it's the american marketing strategy used by Netflix. Compare the posters used in France for the theater release and the Netflix poster. I legit had no idea they were the same movie after seeing the French poster in a French theater the other day and then watching Americans complaining online a few hours later.

No. 627839

>>627831
But the other anons are talking about the content of the movie, not the posters

No. 627841

>>627826
What? she’s obviously talking about scrote pandering players. Unfortunately, these communities have a lot of them along with annoying as fuck men who like to yell the N word into the mic. Typical gamer shit.

No. 627875

File: 1599819290793.png (190.24 KB, 500x650, ?DOKE°88.png)

I don't care if I sound like a crybaby, I hate work and it makes me wanna kill myself, I wish I could spend my time with the people I love, crafting shit and walking in nature. I wish I could be free.

No. 627881

>>627875
Same, anon. I wish my contribution to this world could be to pick berries for the communal pie and just dream away and listen to the birds and smell the flowers while at it, and everyone would be okay with that because my role is to pick the berries and nothing more, and people would really appreciate that sweet, sweet pie enough to leave me be.

No. 627908

Anons, I am so sad, I need to bitch about something petty and dumb.
I'm studying and there's about forty or something people in my course (all women, so I was hopeful that I could make some friends!). They made a group chat at the start of the year I guess, and someone added it to me today. I was already like wtf they had a group this whole time without me, but then I opened it and saw that just before I was added to the chat, a bunch of girls had removed messages. You know how you can 'unsend' on messenger? They did that. I feel like they were saying something mean about me or why else would they delete it? I asked and they said they had accidentally sent a message to the wrong group chat. What, all five of you did?? I've felt like shit all day thinking these people are all laughing at me behind my back. I usually look forward to my classes but I'm kinda dreading it now.

No. 627910

File: 1599823912465.gif (1.54 MB, 360x234, a942d1dd-34cc-4185-a7c9-f02872…)

To be 100% honest, I regret not killing myself when I was younger. I never thought I'd live to be 18, now I'm 25 and my life might not be the worst but it still sucks, simply due to lack of money, location and social circle.

I can't fix most of these no matter how hard. My family lives slightly above poverty and there's always some stupid shit around the house that needs to be fixed etc and my parents are really immature so I have to take care of everything. I almost had enough money to get a car but had to give it all away to get the roof fixed because it was rotting and wouldn't hold for another year. I'm broke again. I can't find a better job ot education due location and lack of transport. I can't go and be a full time student because my parents need me to help them out financially. A lwa is or will be passed to allow employers to employ more immigrants to work so student jobs will suffer.

I'm trying to kind of learn programming and maybe try to get a certificate for it or some shit but fuck I don't feel like it's worth it at all. I have to suffer and slave away to be bearly able to survive. What's the fucking point?

No. 627911

Can a therapist bully their clients? I blocked my therapist

No. 627912

>>627910
kys poorfag(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)

No. 627914

>>627908
That sucks, they seem really mean. I don't think it's petty or dumb to be upset about this, since it's hard to come to any other conclusion but that you were mentioned in these messages. But in the end you were invited and maybe if some of them were maybe not convinced about you, whoever decided to invite you wanted to do it, so now just be yourself and they'll see you're cool.
And if they decide to be immature and act weird toward you, just leave the group, pointless to get into any drama.

No. 627916

>>627910
Same, 99% of my life is struggling. I wish I was born in a wealthy cell connected family who could just give me a job.

No. 627920

>>622665
Give me strength today, anons. I have been dreading this day all week. I have to work with this absolute creepy annoying fat fucking scrote. I don't tend to use scrote, but this useless fuck is the definition of scrote. The job is overseeing inmates doing their work. (Get paid very good money to walk around and sit). Day one and the first thing he does in complain about the job, how his old one was worse and how lazy and fat his wife is. Day two was him complaining about how he didn't have keys to things (even though he was told how to get them). Day 3 was him mad that he had to work a second shift and then a first shift the next day, even though he offered. When told, "hey just tell the boss, they will change things for you".. "oh no the schedule is set we can't change it, it's the bosses mess up not mine". Day 4 began the touching. Grabbing the arm or touching the shoulder to get your attention. Never the male employees , just the women.
An absolute cringe moment was when and inmate asked for tape. One of our employees said, "sure but don't cut yourself on the dispenser, I don't want to get a murder charge" after the inmate left she said, omg, I forgot he's in here for murdering his girlfriend.. Fat fuck said "oh I'm sure she deserved it".
I legit hate this piece of shit and I want him to quit, he just works there to try to get management experience, but he will never get the office job. There's too many very competent women ahead of him (and yes he has remarked how he should go ahead of them because women won't be taken seriously by anyone in a prison setting).

No. 627923

>>627912
This is what mental illness looks like.