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Townhall is scheduled for May 22nd, GMT 2PM.

File: 1589980775684.png (1.17 MB, 750x542, GM5c4us.png)

No. 555948

The more secrets you feed the farm, the stronger the farm gets. Lay yourselves bare before the farm gods.

Previous thread: >>>/ot/541792

Commentary is allowed.

No. 555951

In elementary school, my friends and I sneaked onto the roof after the janitor forgot to lock the door. We threw stones at the other children in the playground and then ran away without getting caught.

No. 555953

Back in 2016 I did weed, xanax and cocaine and I was also very into that "cool druggy aesthetic" but now I regret everything and cringe whenever I remember it

Thank fucking god I didn't end up as an addict

No. 555954

When I was working retail, it was just a part time job in a big clothing store that's well known in my country for attracting the weirdest customers ever. I had a mentally disabled coworker I just couldn't stand, I don't know what was up with him exactly and it's not like I get his diagnosis or whatever but he was basically acting like an overgrown child who never showered because for some reason he always smelled like saliva, shit was foul. Since we were understaffed it felt like I was basically babysitting an actual, literal retard while working for two people at once and being insulted or harassed by customers all day long. No way in hell I'm ever working with a retard ever again. I'm sure the company just wanted to reach their quota of disabled workers by hiring him.

No. 555961

>I did weed, xanax and cocaine
>I did weed
>Thank fucking god I didn't end up as an addict


No. 555963

I took my own virginity

No. 555965

>>555963 what do you mean?

No. 555968

If you mean with your fingers/a toy, I did that too. Didn't want a dick hurting me

No. 555970

I knew a cunt like you was about to gatekeep a bunch of drugs lmfao. Should've said that I did it more than once and there were times where I was just completely high out of my mind nearly every day uwu

No. 555972

"you'll cowards dont even smoke crack" is a great look, tweaker-chan

No. 555973

jesus anon, shut up. just shut up. i'm so tired of this ahahahah you haven't even done hard drugs? how does it feel to have doing shitty substances that destroy your body be your only achievement?

No. 555976

i'm the laziest fuck on the planet and if i had the opportunity to be a NEET i'd scoop up that opportunity in a millisecond.

No. 555980

I wish [redacted] gets the virus and dies already.

No. 555983

I grew up in a house where my dad was like "Well you're 18 now, time to move out!" I'm grateful tbh. I was depressed and would've gone NEET if my parents enabled it.

No. 555984

NTA but I think they greentexted the "I did weed" part next to "Thank fucking god I didn't end up as an addict" because it's commonly understood that there is no physical component that makes weed addictive. I don't think anon was saying that coke and xannies aren't bad, just that one of those things is not like the others. It's just a meme that 'weed addiction' sounds silly.

No. 555985

Nta but who tf didnt

No. 555987

Most of my friends didn't and had to deal with a painful first time. I bought an average sized dildo because I wanted to get it done myself.

No. 555988

I wish this on my ex's ex who constantly interfered with my relationship and attempted to manipulated my boyfriend at the time against me. Really hope she just drops dead

No. 555995

weed dependency is so bad though idc i was a xanfag for a minute so glass houses but people who depend on weed are generally leading terrible lives like shayna

No. 555996

same i was fuckin myself for years b4 i lost it and the guy i lost it to didnt even believe it was my first time like why? just because it's my first time doesn't make me completely innocent at all it just so happened to be the first time i had had sex with another person. it's all so stupid do they think women aren't aware of sex

No. 556029

Similar here, it took quite a few attempts to manage my first toy because the pain was so intense. I continued to have sharp pain and some bleeding the first dozen or so times that I fucked toys. I'm generally good with pain but my hymen was a bitch to stretch.

Years later when I eventually had sex with a guy I only told him it was my first time afterwards.. he didn't believe me so I explained that I had used toys for years. He seemed so disappointed! I hate that men have this thing about 'popping it' as if our pain is their accomplishment. I'm glad I dealt with it my own way.

No. 556032

honestly! and what was left of my hymen didnt even break the first time i had sex it happened another time they're all just so dumb

No. 556048

the only sex i genuinely was enthusiastic about and felt was passionate was with my recent ex. i think about him constantly and can only get off to thoughts of him. i love him fully, wholly and completely. hes the only guy who got me off, ive never been so deeply in love with anyone and never will again.

we broke up and it's difficult for me cos his ex gf is still his best friend but is still obsessed with him and hated me for dating him. he also moved to another country to be with me, so they dont see each other. he denies the extent of her infatuation with him and dismisses obvious flirting (eg sexy selfies, disparaging me) as 'friendliness'.

i tried to be friends with her, but when we broke up she wrote a callout post about how toxic uwu i am, even though she supposedly abused/raped him in the past. the only reason she hates me is because im dating someone shes hung up over, i really wish she gave me a genuine chance and i feel sad that the progress i made with her was lost that day.

i just want to get back together, but this time just make peace with her obsession and ignore it.

its been a year and he moved transatlantically to be with me, they see each other barely once a year. so why is she so delusional and unable to move on?

her friends should tell her: let him go, he let you go a long time ago.

No. 556066

i think i learned to be more cautious, no one really teaches you that that kinda stuff happens

No. 556076

I watched an old program from the UK recently, it showed someone following men who were on the sex offenders register to see how they deal with issues like employment and living restrictions after leaving prison. One guy was 'into cameras and recording things as a hobby' and he had a camera pointed out of his window. They asked him to show the recordings and it was little girls from his road doing handstands while wearing dresses… all very innocent. He just loved photography! Pretty pathetic

No. 556081

I'm kinda wary of bisexual women who are in relationships with men and can't stop claiming how bi they are, especially when making comments about random women's attractiveness, it feels like they are overcompensating or feeling bad about dating a guy. Also, extremely unpopular opinion among bi people, but I think we get some sort of straight passing privilege if we date a member of the opposite sex.

No. 556083

sometimes I want to be a Christian again

No. 556090

i believe him! good point sir. i heard that excuse recently but i forget where.
i looked up my grandma's house on the registry and there were 3 on her street, but not the house i was scared about. but it did say 1 offender not registered? in a town of >1000 kinda spooky to think.

No. 556091

>extremely unpopular opinion among bi people
is it really

No. 556093

I once took a really huge shit right outside our house's main door because I couldn't get the key in in time. I was 13.
And later my mom was cursing whoever took the shit there while cleaning it and I think that is why my life has gone to shit.

No. 556095

lmfaoo. when i was in 6th-ish grade, i dropped my back pack the second i got off the school bus and booked it home. i ended up shitting my pants (i wore boxers to make matters worse) as i opened the door and left my fucking caked underwear in the bathroom for some reason. i know my mom cleaned up but it hasn't been brought up again. i don't even know what the hallway looked like i just changed and went back outside to get my backpack

No. 556101

I shit myself the other day. we only have 1 bathroom and my mom loves to take 45+ minutes every time she uses the bathroom. I couldn't get in in time and the poop just forced itself out. had to trash a pair of underwear, wash my pants and wipe of my belt (yes, it got on my belt).

No. 556102

I don't love my mom. If I had it my way, I would not be in contact with her at all. She's extremely clingy and abusive and I have to walk on eggshells with her constantly. The only reason I haven't cut her off completely is that I'm afraid she'll get really depressed or even suicidal. She used to say subtly manipulative shit to me all the time when I was growing up, like "I would have killed myself long ago if it weren't for you kids." It really fucked me up and I still feel somewhat responsible for her happiness even at almost 30.

No. 556103

I pissed myself twice; six years ago at the mall while trying to run to the nearest bathroom which I never made on time and last year while outside at my university campus while taking the stairs in front of anyone nearby.

The first time, I bought a pair of tights and nobody really noticed while I stood there, frightened as piss was running down my legs but the second time I had a feeling people saw as I was wearing bright blue jeans so I tied my big ass parka around my waist and strolled away.

No. 556105

Same except I actually love my mom and cannot bare living without her. I have a feeling we’re codependent of each other

No. 556106

school bus anon here. only time will take the embarrassment away..mostly

you know what, i actually did shart in front of my girlfriend a few months ago. she'd literally been trying to get me to do it because she thought it would be funny. then it happened and all she could was laugh her ass off while i was yelling at her to help me because this was her doing

No. 556108

File: 1590005628713.jpg (16.19 KB, 716x724, 1418940653001-1.jpg)

No. 556110

Do you guys actually have things in common? I sometimes wonder if I'd feel any inclination whatsoever to stay in contact with mine if we did.

No. 556118

weird hill to die on

No. 556132

Our looks…? And some personality traits I believe

We have some interests in common and do have heart-to-heart convos bu t we never really talked about nor gone over the past and current toxicity of our family life, I don’t think either of us want to tbh.

I remember back in 2011 when we were waiting for our ride for my sister’s quinceñera, we were completely alone and it felt so awkward while talking about bracelets.

2018 that awkwardness wasn’t really bad when I had to spend the nights with her at the hospital during her ankle surgery. I was comfortable being by her side and happy being away from my stepfather but sometimes I got the feeling she didn’t want me around much and was asking for my sister (see above) or my stepdad to spend the other nights, I didn’t felt wanted and it still hurts to this day despite trying to mend the relationship.

No. 556174

Idk why people are shitting on you. Weed addiction can be a thing. Sometimes you’re not addicted to the substance itself but the lifestyle, the friends and the rituals around it.

Kinda in the same boat at the moment because all of my mates take one thing or the other and every get together or party I join there’s drugs. I have no self control and the only thing that doesn’t tempt me in the slightest is crack or heroin.

I’m almost tempted to start dealing because I lost my job to Corona and everyone around me is too dumb to figure out how to buy shit online so they just buy it overpriced on the streets. I could make hundreds every weekend with just a few grams.

Sometimes I’m tempted to leave the country and start over somewhere else to get away from it all but now all borders are closed until at least next year.

No. 556180

I feel the same way about my dad. Even told me the same spiel about killing himself. I think he's dumb enough where he doesn't even realize just how insanely manipulative that is even if it is true. Good times.

Don't let her drag you down. You deserved better anon.

No. 556181

It could be anon. I knew a person working in an asylum and she’d have all kind of people, ranging from depressed but sane to pyromaniacs. Those people often can’t hold a job and she’d work hard to place them in shops and stores. Sorry you had to deal with that, we tend to think of slow or disabled people as sweet people but sometimes they’re straight up nasty and assholes that add onto your workload.

I feel a bit bad because I’m leading on several guys and part of me feels that it’s wrong but the other part just thinks that I never specified anything and it’s their own fault for falling for me when I never made any promises.
In reality, I don’t mind hooking up with men but romantically I only fall for women.

I have this bad habit of “flirting” and hyping up people when I’m tipsy and they fall for it every time.
So if any anon is out there trying to figure out how to flirt with straight dudes, just find a legit thing about them that is nice, look at them straight in the eyes and say crap like “I think it’s amazing that you did X! I’m really impressed”. Or just say shit like “You’re absolutely right” when they say something. That’s all they need really.

No. 556184

File: 1590023665695.jpeg (18.71 KB, 164x250, 4CA1159A-E615-4C40-B2FA-C7C2CE…)

My son is three months old; I’m breastfeeding. (Attached to baby 24/7) So like my body’s fully healed and such. I can only have sex with my fiancé when we’re both not tired and it has to be all quick. I love my son but I want some nasty stinky monkey sweaty, naked SEX. All I can think of all day.

No. 556235

What? Is it a fetish or did you really just not make it?

No. 556238

Yeah that's what I suspected at first, but then I remember how many other disabled workers there were who had physical disabilities and who did their job just fine but were pressured to do impossible shit by managers and made to feel guilty for stupid shit and it pisses me off even more. I remember one of my former coworkers with type 1 diabetes who felt like she was going to pass out all of a sudden (most likely hypoglycemia but I don't know much about type 1 diabetes to guess for sure) and I told her to go to the locker room asap so she could get her insuline injection and I was reprimanded by a manager for that because I didn't call him before letting her leave. Even though I wasn't even trained properly in the first place so I had no idea I was supposed to call him. My former coworker is considered a disabled worker by law in my country and there are a bunch of disabled people who can hold jobs just fine AND feel quotas but companies hire adults who act like super stressed 5 years old kids and who don't do anything valuable.

No. 556252

I love my bf but I will always regret that he's poor and without a family just like me so we'll always struggle and have no one to rely on. He's also even less street smart than me so we're really fucked and it stresses me.

No. 556256

I can't stand my bf but I love what I've done to the balcony so it would be hard to leave, especially with summer around the corner.

No. 556257

what the fuck, can you elaborate

No. 556259

This is personal drama I dream about. Fuck you but not really.

No. 556260


Elaborate in what way?

Bf bad
Balcony good

And before you ask, yes, I am 100% lacking in empathy. What benefits me and material wealth always matters more to me than other people. I've come to accept it even if I'd never confess to it irl.

No. 556271

Balcony pics?

No. 556279

i can get off to memories with my ex, and quickly. he is extremely hot, ive never had this with anyone before. he is the epitome of sexy to me. i would do literally anything for him back.

No. 556281

Hahahahaha I have the exact dilemma rn except I’m inlove with my room, I think if we broke up he would be the one to leave but I’m not sure as his name is signed for the apt
Good luck anon

No. 556282

> I've come to accept it even if I'd never confess to it irl
>I’ve come to accept it
Yeah, because with all the empathy you lack, it just eats you up inside.

No. 556286


I just hate the thought of people seeing right through me so I can't leech off of them anymore.
I live rent free in the nicest apartment building in town, you can't just throw that away

No. 556306

lmao you’re a psychopathic cunt. Be single, for everyone else’s sake. And stop mooching

No. 556316

Lmao what's so great about a fucking apartment balcony and a room that you'd stick around to perform and put up with a guy you dislike. You're a couple of weirdos trying to play up the cold unfeeling sociopath act because in reality you're either too incapable or too cowardly to start over yourselves. No one here above the age of 25 thinks you're cool haha it's pathetic.

No. 556328


Obviously jealous of my balcony

No. 556363

I couldn’t make it on time and these events are separated by five years, except the third time at the mall which happened again either before or after the uni event

No. 556378

You sound like a bitch, should probably stick to eating pussy

What if he decides to leave you instead? Are you gonna Ted Bundy his ass just so you can keep your precious apartment?

Nobody is jealous of your stupid balcony, you stupid cunt.

No. 556380

lmao. i like you anon

No. 556388

are you having a bad day, nonny

>What benefits me and material wealth always matters more to me than other people
fucking queen

No. 556403

File: 1590078669897.jpg (45.58 KB, 750x500, perro-cara-hinchada-por-comer-…)

Late response but I did it with a dildo. Tbh I was kinda embarrassed of still being a virgin at 21 and also didn't want a man to take it so I just did it. Feels good knowing other girls did the same because I was feeling like such a weirdo. My friend's bf kept pressuring her while we were at a school trip and it went really bad, she ended up crying and he was actually mad at her after. It gave me a big impression at the time

No. 556407

you're staying with a guy you don't like over a fucking balcony or whatever? whole new level of pathetic.

No. 556434

File: 1590082407805.jpg (63.75 KB, 681x388, Bonyboi.jpg)

I attract anorexic men and I'm not sure why because I'm quite fat and love food. Is it because I'm into the brooding boi music scene types?

The new man I'm dating is over 6' but is only 140 pounds when wet, he's pretty skelly(like even more than far left of pic related). I feel ashamed to eat or mention food around him because he only eats once a day and is a picky eater. Like he doesn't eat junk food-which is good-but he also doesn't like a lot of normal foods either. Sometimes when I smoke weed and we'll be talking on the phone I'll be like "Awwwwwh yeah doesn't _____ sound great to eat right now?!" and he'll reply that he isn't hungry kek. I hate being fatter than my boyfriends but idk maybe I'm like thinspo to them or something. Which doesn't make sense because they're romantic and are sexually attracted to my body. They never ask me to perform fat fetish-specific activities like face sitting or belly squashing plus the sex is always fairly vanilla so I'm not sure if it's sexually motivated either.
>inb4 I'm exaggerating
I did legit date a diagnosed anorexic male like several years ago but back then I wrote it off cause he did have a phobia of becoming obese after a brain tumor had caused his obesity, so I didn't think that had anything to do with me.

I tried googling "fat women with skinny men" but all I get are articles talking about skinny women dating obese dudes, or a bunch of people shitting themselves because a 400 pound woman said she only wants to bang skinny dudes. I'm not terribly insecure about it cause I am making better dieting choices as of late and am losing, but I was just curious about the psychology.

No. 556438

I can't help at all anon, but I am basically like you and.. now I don't feel alone anymore. (Being overweight and dating underweight/ twinkish guys is my Tradermark for years.)

No. 556442

Maybe I'm thinking about it too deeply, but I wonder if it's because being underweight seems like the male social equivalent of women being chubby? Like, they're both viewed as "why don't you get up and do something to fit into the standard of beauty??" but it's either too difficult or they just don't want to. Being big/chubby for men is acceptable and masculine, while being super unhealthy thin is acceptable as "feminine" for women, so skinny men and fat women are on opposite ends of the same thing. Am I making sense?

I feel like this experience potentially makes skelly dudes have more open-minded ideas about beauty and attraction. I also date skinny dudes and I feel like they're less stuck up about what women should look like. Idk, this is interesting, thanks for listening to my podcast

No. 556443

Scrotes mad

No. 556447

i'm thinking of using a dildo too down the line but god i hope this isn't me

No. 556462

>What benefits me and material wealth always matters more to me than other people. I've come to accept it even if I'd never confess to it irl.

Anon please stop embarrassing yourself. You're literally just afraid of intimacy and fixate on the fleeting joys that material possessions bring you as a cope. There are no less than 50 million other people on this planet who also do this. Nobody who lacks empathy to the point of being an actual danger to others goes around subtly bragging about it for edge points.

People who larp as sociopaths internet are harmless to the point of being pathetic.

No. 556470

Aw you’re deflecting, how cute!

Why don’t you go find a sugar daddy if you like material wealth, or are you too much of a pussy to go through the ordeal of sacrificing whatever dignity you may have?

I’m sure rich old men are okay with you mooching off them if you give them what they want, know what I mean?

No. 556475

I just heard there was a covid spike in maryland where my ex lives. lowkey hoping he gets it.

No. 556479

I think you are overthinking it, they're actually unable to gain weight due to low appetite and forgetting to eat.
There is probably more things about you to like than your excess weight, to assume that they are into you because they're chubby fetishists would be quite a stretch, i think, they most likely wouldn't mind if you dropped some weight, they might be self-conscious over not being enable them to perform some more advanced gymnastics in bed due to being skellies themselves.

No. 556480

Not OP keep seething brokefag scrotoid

No. 556500

My husband wanted a prenup when we first got married, a few months later I wanted a divorce but didn't want to be in the streets so I asked if we could vacation to Japan because I know like a typical male he would cheat, now I get 1200 in alimony

No. 556502

same, anon. when he first got together one of the things I liked about him was how well put-together he seemed: he had a stable job, nice friends and cool hobbies. A year later and I´ve gradually found out that he constantly calls in sick because "I couldn't sleep last night" because he stayed up playing cod with his friends. He spends money on things he never uses and has to call his parents at the end of each month to get help. And a lot more. I feel tricked and dumb and completely embarrassed to be his gf. I can't stand him and I want the break-up to really sting and I´m working on my speech to reach maximum impact. Not really proud of my maturity level

No. 556505

kek I know I am! And this is a confession thread, I don't get why people get sandy pussies over this

No. 556507

No. 556521

I’m in Maryland and my ex lives in the city that’s still on lockdown and I’m BIG hoping he gets it, he’s one of those boys who get a cold and calls out of work for a weekend but expected me to still give him head when I had mono. I’ll pray for your ex & mine <3(<3)

No. 556522

Aww u mad?

My point still stand, go find a sugar daddy you whore :)(go back to kiwifarms)

No. 556529

File: 1590094042617.jpg (28.97 KB, 480x420, 7a3ea51f194d6f386dd8966e02c559…)

I would like to see your balcony anon, i'm sure it's lovely!

No. 556592

I'm jealous of her balcony. I want pics, anon. What did you do with it?

No. 556609

Why do I feel like these posts are the actual mad scrotes, trying to get the balcony pics so they can dox OP and out her..("hi scrote")

No. 556615

u look like u have dirt neck

No. 556618

Pretty sure it is kek

No. 556624


No. 556631

is doxing a serious concern people have on here? who cares. just don't post your actual face or exact city and you shouldn't worry

No. 556638

I didn't ask but I'd be curious to see the balcony anon was making herself miserable over.

No. 556652

I never posted this with the intention of her ever posting her balcony. It was mainly because I thought it was funny the scrote was crying over a balcony. Anon hyped up the balcony so much I can't help and be curious as to what she did with it.

No. 556654

Calm down, paranoia-chan. I just wanted to see flowers and herbs and shit.

No. 556681

Sure jumped to defend yourself quick lol(continuous "hi scrote")

No. 556821

I like my face and my body, but I don't like seeing pictures of me, I am tall, I have a strong jawline and bony shoulders, I really look troonish on many of them.

No. 556825

worry not anon. you're not troonish. women vary so much. there are so many different kinds, we're not all petite with t&a to boot. i'm like 5'11 and stocky myself and masculine but it's okay. we're still women. no wrong way to be a woman!

No. 556827

Pictures aren't accurate most of the time, selfies almost always look fucked up because of the lenses, and if someone else takes a picture of you from far enough there's still chances they captured you when you were in an awkward position or in the middle of moving. I hate pictures of myself too because my face always looks deformed in them (either I have a baby face or I look like an emaciated zombie, no in-between), but I also dislike being filmed because I hate my voice.

No. 556847

Haha, I know, I really like my androgynous features, I think they compliment me really well, I'm just frustrated that I don't have any decent pic of me. It doesn't help that I never know how to pose and smile, so I tend to look like an autistic agp, especially next to other women.

No. 556897

This guy I'm friends with gave me chlamydia and I'm so embarrassed and mad about it.

No. 556940

i'm in love with invadervie's voice and mannerisms

No. 556942

I thought she was cute, she’s just a bit sanctimonious and sometimes tries too hard to play “nerdy elf waifu” thing. I lurked some of her streams way before the whole retarded crusade against her even happened. People really use her age and personal style as talking points, undeserved and comes of as incel MRA shit to me.

No. 556971

Ew did you talk to him? If it was me he'd hear it

No. 556972

Yet another reason hookup sex is gross.

No. 556976

Yeah I did. He was the one that suggested that I go get tested but he made it seem like he wanted us to both get tested to make sure we we're clean before having sex again bc he does have multiple partners. But he never told me that he came back for anything and I'm pissed he wasn't up front with me about it.

He said he was scared to tell me bc he didn't want it to ruin our friendship (we have a long history and have know each other since middle school and only have sex in the occasion).
So while I'm mad at him, there's not much he can do but say sorry. He didn't know he had it when we had sex and I should've been more responsible for myself and asked about how many partners he had, if they were using protection and probably should've used protection myself.

No. 556983

Anon, you need to love yourself. It sounds like you were literally letting this guy use you as ass on demand. Also, he's a horrible "friend" if he lies to you about something that serious. Cut him off.

No. 557001

I'm so afraid that I'm going to end up killing myself. I am a deeply broken person and I get virtually no joy out of life anymore. I'm afraid if this goes on for much longer that I'm not going to have a choice.

No. 557013

My chiropractor is a 32 year old Chad.

I want to sit on his face.
Why do I do this to myself. Now my face gets red whenever he looks directly into it EW I’m like an awkward 10 year old save me

No. 557026

I don't get this? do you want him to eat you out or do you have want to just sit on his face(like how the fuck does that have give any sexual pleasure)

No. 557030

i rly liked the movie glass.

No. 557036

…Are you underage?

No. 557038

no I'm just not a degenerate, I'm sorry I don't understand the nuances of face sitting

No. 557042

Face sitting implies being eaten out, yeah.

No. 557048

eww. i thought everyone that shit is a bullshit new age pseudoscience that gives you arthritis when you get old.

No. 557071

I know I might get called selfposting for this, but I really think Brittany Venti is pretty, and I'm envious of her looks and hair.

No. 557072

are you that ugly

No. 557075

I'm sorry what???

No. 557088

she looks like a raggy meth head who was blessed with a pair of decent boobs

No. 557096

She looks like Splice (2009) in a wig

No. 557104

Sorry but selfpost, kek.

No. 557107

Tbh, I have little to no confidence, and I do consider myself ugly, however I also have a low expectations rate.
Understandable, a lot of people call her ugly and she has been caught reading and posting here

No. 557116

I agree w/this. Her personality makes her ugly.

No. 557132

File: 1590213180960.gif (1.7 MB, 320x294, 1590011706341.gif)

When I was 11 years old, the most hated girl in my school called me a nigger and told me I was going to hell because I wasn't a Christian. I sat behind her in class so I had fun sticking messages on her back with another girl I didn't like. During recess, we would throw water on her and trip her up. I also pretended to forgive her and be her friend in order to talk to her and thus push her to say ridiculous things to make my friends and I laugh, which was easy because she was socially inept. The teachers noticed us but didn't say anything most of the time, which is funny because I used to get yelled at when I was behaving/being bullied before. I feel a bit bad for the girl now, she was poorly dressed and clearly from a poor family. Even the younger kids made fun of her.

No. 557155

I'm developing a dumb platonic crush on a friend's boyfriends. I'm almost sure this is all because we are getting closer thru chat because of the quarantine. I know this feeling is very one sided since I'm happy in a relationship and probably this all going to pass when the lockdown is over but still.

No. 557168

I danced alone to the new 1975 album in my room last night like a fucking crazed fool and today I woke up with severe body cramps and stiffness in my neck. Like can't get out of bed type of pain.

No. 557194

File: 1590234095972.jpeg (523.18 KB, 750x1117, C5291A60-E408-4254-8D34-51ADF9…)

Fbeing tall. Everytime I see a girl complain about being short I wanna fucking die. bitch what is it, you’re so feminine? You’re seen as such a womanly woman. Must be so difficult also you can just wear heels what can tall girls do to erase their stature? I wanna be like 5’3” and cute. I feel giant and intimidating, my shoulders are broad and rib cage is way wider than my hips. I feel attacked when farmers talk about trannies cause all that literally applies to me and I was born a biological female

No. 557203

How tall are you anon?
I'm on the taller side and wouldn't mind being a little more taller, being tall is the fucking best imo

No. 557206

I'm very short and wish I was taller tbh. It's so intimidating to be around guys because they look like fucking giants next to me.

No. 557207

Become a badass warrior princess.

No. 557214

wish i could have some of your height anon. being short is hell when your stature is chubby or fat by default.

No. 557218

i just dont go online through my phone that much since my friend keeps talking about the things she likes and i'd always indulge her with her interest but whenever i talk about mine she sometimes go offline and waited for a few hours until the hype of the conversation dies down so she can talk again or just give generic or short responses. I only realize this since last month when quarantine order took effect. I love her but… at least pretend or just bullshit a three sentence paragraph or smth, that's what i do.

For a few months or years, i had endured her ramble about kpop, her kpop shippings, bias and the group she loves to the point of death. Now, it's thai or chinese bl. I regret recommending her a series (even though i dont watch or like but only know due to popularity) that is now her obsession atm.

No. 557219

You’re not alone, this is literally the same situation I have with my sister down to the kpop. It sucks

No. 557221

i really wish i could voice out my opinion in the situation but then i realize she can be a bit stubborn or "blind." she literally thought this two actors in a thai bl drama are dating but when i tried to be realistic and told her that it could be publicity stunt with the gestures and other things they do with each other. she denied until one of the actors in the series stated that they were anything but lovers. it really broke her heart. now, she jokes about the 'delulu' fans when that was her before.

god, the kpop shipping was worse though but good thing she stopped talking about it when the group is currently on a hiatus.

she might not see our friendship the way i do and i don't want to fight with her considering she and i have been friends for almost a decade now.

anon, if you have the chance please talk to your sister. you're killing your ears and eyes off if it continues like that.

No. 557231

183cm / 6'0 tall anon here.
i understand how you feel. i refuse to wear heels because i hate looking even more down on people while i talk and standing out.
however, i hope you come to accept your height and your body. it's tough sometimes, but i've grown to like my height - we can't do anything about it so why stress over it?

No. 557238

First of all, tall woman =/= tranny. Being "small and cute" is overrated and imo, not that meaningful among adult women.
Personally, I like tall women a lot. I'm sure you look good.

No. 557255

tall women are the best and femininity itself is underrated. 5'11 anon with broad shoulders too here, you can become alienated from beauty standards simply by being outside of the norm but genius is never appreciated in its time lmao! i don't personally understand the appeal of shorter/slimmer women, but that's the beauty of people. we're all so wonderfully different

No. 557257

samefag, *overrated!

No. 557391

I miss going to the library

No. 557410

File: 1590265326639.jpg (26.47 KB, 500x314, 08298648f4cd94f81787b470771d67…)

Try being 5'3 yet still having broad and mannish features WITH the added bonus of looking like shit if you gain five pounds who no one takes seriously because you're child height.
That's life as a 5'3. Seriously, you don't have it so bad. I've been called 'tranny' by incels too at this height. People who are calling biological women trannies don't give a shit how tall or short you are, they're saying it to hurt you.
>all women in pic related weigh 150

No. 557436

Most short women I have seen are fat, it's socially acceptable to be fat for short women because logically you know they didn't put on that much height.

No. 557438


No. 557512

It's socially unacceptable for anyone. For anyone young at least.

No. 557521

I hope to kill myself within the next 3-5 years, if I can stand it that long, simply because I am not pretty enough for my own liking. Probably the most disgusting part is that I know I am objectively not that bad, maybe even beautiful for some tastes, but it's not good enough for me. I hate my face and cry over it daily, which makes me feel worse because it's so vain and stupid. I'm so ashamed and I'm sick of feeling ugly and I'm going to kill myself before I turn 30, I'm set on it. This is retarded

No. 557522

File: 1590277742636.gif (1.64 KB, 26x25, 0Hs9zTRBM.gif)

at least you know how retarded you're being rn

No. 557527

Well you'll just be another one for the statistics.

No. 557536

That's like killing yourself because you're middle class rather than a millionaire, or just smart instead of a genius. There is more to life than looks, and feeling sorry for yourself for not being 10/10 is pure greed.

No. 557565

What if you're reborn as an ugly person? There's plenty of things you can do to make yourself more beautiful anon, don't give up yet.

No. 557570

you're not going to kill yourself if you're posting it on lolcow but you're clearly at a certain level of distress so i understand. look, who gives a fuck about being ugly? seriously, you're brainwashed. you don't have to look pretty just because you're a woman. we're all just evolved animals and you don't deserve anything negative to happen to you just because you don't think your genetic features align with some standard people thought up and a standard which varies widely across the globe. anon, watch a documentary on women in india who have survived acid attacks. some of them don't even have a face but they're still alive and they are trying every day. it's cold for me to just call you retarded because it's been instilled in you from a young age that if you're not pretty, you're not good at being a woman but fuck that. seriously. you do not have to look like anything. just be a decent human being

No. 557583

Ugly people absolutely deserve to die. Appreciation for aesthetics is what sets people apart from (other) animals so if you're ugly, how different are you from an animal?

No. 557590

Nta but get help

No. 557595

Have thought about all of this and come to the conclusion that since my specific face is what bothers me, 1.) I think I would be fine with a different ugly face, if reborn 2.) I hate any other form of vanity and consumerism/materialism and I think it's fine to be "ugly", I genuinely don't find anyone other than myself ugly 3) I don't feel sorry for myself because I know I'm being a dumbass, I'm just very exhausted

Thank you. I know you're absolutely right and when I think about women in the world who actually suffer injustice and real strife, I feel ashamed of myself for feeling this way. That's why I posted it here. You're right, I probably won't kms. I'll try to focus on being a good person.

No. 557602


No. 557637

Sometimes I kind of wanna be a cow

No. 557640

Anon, you already are
Jokes aside, is it the attention? People checking up on you? Being followed and commented on?

No. 557651

I don't really know. The attention I guess and making people laugh

No. 557665

For the first time in my life I'm proud of something I’m accomplishing and not in the healthiest way but part of my motivation comes from wanting to prove the people who questioned me wrong.
It may sound dumb but I get so much satisfaction day by day and even when they try to demotivate me by snarky remarks, it only adds fuel to my goals.

No. 557703

living well is the best revenge keep it up anon!

No. 557740

I started a twitch just for the hell of it and I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone but my boyfriend. It's only been a week but it's fun even though no one watches me.

No. 557747

my attention span is so bad that I will watch 2 youtube videos at once, one on my computer and one on my phone

No. 557767

i always wanted to try being a fakeboi or a transtrender because I envy the "freedom" they get and this camaraderie they have with one another.

No. 557773

Don't, the freedom is an illusion because they are the ones to set up barriers about what are men and women, no place for being gender non conforming. Also, the camaraderie is fake and only for the camera, deep down they all hate each other, it's a competition to see who is the most trans of them all, and there's a huge crabs in the bucket mentality, once somebody leaves the cult, they are branded excommunicate.

No. 557777

i see. i kinda notice from a group of fakebois that i follow on instagram that they stopped talking to their friends who left the trans scene and became girls again. idk why, i always thought that the girls were living somewhere far and couldn't communicate with them longer but there was one who came back from university but only have few pictures from one location and it's because their fans were demanding for a reunion.

maybe i was seeing things from the shallow point of view. especially since i'm in a place where being a tomboy meant you're a lesbian, and also a disappointment, and not just someone who likes things far from the norm. it took years for my mom to realize i could never be like her. thanks, anon.

No. 557779

I love my mom but when she cooks anything but Mexican food it is the most bland unseasoned food.

No. 557881

File: 1590336369415.jpg (182.33 KB, 740x551, lol.jpg)

I use space e-mail still to this day. It used to be a huge part of my Tumblr phase back in 2013-2016 and I still haven't grown tired of using it. It's nice to say whatever I want on there and send it. Most e-mails are from so many years ago though, I wonder what happened to the people in them.

Pic attached is a random email I just got from someone who's kin with Jean SNK and writing this to Marco aka their "kin mate" and it made me laugh. It's very cringe but I kinda find it endearing, because it's just so crazy to me how it's from 2013 and back then the SNK fandom was peaking so hard.

I'm feeling pretty nostalgic and sad right now, because I miss those times so much even though I used to be a genderspecial fakeboy back then. At least I had a lot of friends, was popular on there and had the time of my life with my blog aesthetic and fandoms I participated in. Nowadays you don't even have anything like that anymore.

No. 557884

hey, me too! that's crazy! it sucks how all the emails are from 2013-2016 though, there are new ones but the sheer volume of space emails from back then means you never get to see em.the joke/kin ones can be kind of annoying but one in every 50 emails is really, really good

No. 557901


if you want to try to do it, do it. if being a fakeboi means cutting your hair short and changing your clothes or name, do it. those things aren't permanent and you might even find out something about who you are and how you express yourself.

sorry to sperg but ill even share my own related confession. despite the fearmongering and clearly biased attitudes and perspectives you'll get here, I know quite a few trans elders and older trans folks, including transmen at all stages of transition, and talking with gender nonconforming or trans people provided me with a perspective I never thought I would've had if I continued to browse boards like gc and other sites. depending where you're located, you either have a lot of barriers to go through, or you may have it easier than others when it comes to transitioning (socially or physically). but there really is a sense when having a deep philosophical conversation with an ACTUAL trans person (and not an internet persona or strawman) that they have a more free and open understanding of themselves and others. Just seeing the dedication some of the trans ppl I've met have gone through just to be able to physically transition or discover who they are is impressive regardless of someone's own personal thoughts towards troons. definitely educate yourself and open yourself up to new perspectives, actually transitioning takes a lot of dedication, time, and self discovery. even if you turn out to not actually be trans, if you're not making irreversible decisions like medical transitioning, you can still learn a lot about yourself. I've met de-transitioners who de-transitioned/no longer identify as trans but still appreciate the journey they went through to realize who they are. of course not everyone is able to say that, but if you really believe you have gender dysphoria or euphoria, I'd definitely talk to a gender therapist or reach out to a local LGBT+ center that may have educational resources.

No. 557928

agreed..i didn't know this was such a divisive opinion

No. 557930

At least you’re honest about being trans is as easy as changing hair and clothes and name kek nothing permanent, just like trying on a costume.
Can you tell me more about these deep philosophical conversations? genuinely curious.

No. 557933

i'm in the same boat except he's not dating anyone, just a long time friend. if we hung out irl, i wouldn't be feeling this maybe. actually, i think it the platonic crush started right before the virus hit the US then quar escalated my feelings. i have a gf and she's the same way with him. it's caused some issues

don't think suicidal people care

could it just be really bad dysmorphia?

i understand the need for camraderie, but they easily cast people out for a slight differing opinion, etc.

No. 557939

Doja Cat could be revealed to be Hitler himself and I would happily continue to be her most loyal simpette because I am so fucking insanely attracted to her

No. 557943

late reply but this made me remember that i pissed myself a few weeks ago at an airport! it was a two hour drive and i was drinking water as well as a large ice coffee from dunkin donuts. about half way there it hit me and i had to pee SO BAD like it hurt thats how bad i had to go but i didnt want to pull over at a gas station or anything bc i was worried it would make me late for my flight (i was already cutting it pretty close) anyway as soon as i got to the airport i ran to the br. i made it into the stall but i couldnt pulll my pants down in time and ended up pissing myself lmao. i just couldnt hold it in anymore and i couldnt stop the pee flow omg. luckily i had clothes in my carry on bag so i changed and no one knew haha

No. 557950

I still use space email too! I've been waiting for that update for.ever. An app would be amazing.

No. 558013

I get really anxious going to Asian restaurants (really any restaurants honestly but Asian ones moreso) to pick up food, so usually I send my mom to get it.

Apparently the place I sent her to didn't have the order I put in so now I'm worried that she's going to yell at them because she called me and said she didn't understand them.

I'm sorry to the Korean woman that is dealing with my mom right now. If anything this makes me want to get over this weird anxiety more.

No. 558019

Update, mom did not yell at them. They got along, bless.

No. 558085

I wouldnt mind being a bang maid for a cute guy. I wouldnt mind him playing video games all day and being a man child who needs me to cook and clean. As long as he has a job and helps with the Bill's.

If he isnt cheating and hes giving me attention at the end of the night I'm fine with it

No. 558086

Said no woman ever.

No. 558088

I'm sure most women would be happy to have a cute, faithful guy who pays the bills and all he expects you to do in exchange is cook and clean. That's easy mode. Too bad reality is he probably wouldn't be attractive or faithful, he'd resent you for not making money/use finances to control you, and eventually expect you to have his kids. Then you'd be stuck with one manchild + actual children, with 10x the work and stress and zero help.

No. 558092

could you do that for me

No. 558098

Eh I've been there and it became exhausting after a while. I always thought I would love to be a mommy gf to some sad ass robot neet, until I dated an older software developer and let him waste my time for 3 years. Manchildren have insane expectations for you and will gaslight you if you don't comply perfectly, most of them are emotionally fucked and irrational/delusional especially if their actual mother coddled them.

No. 558099

I have a weird crush on Hozier and it feels bad.
Wish I could spend my time doing something productive instead of daydreaming about love with unattainable men and fixating on but I’ve been this way literally since I was a child.
All my fantasies revolve around meeting someone and living happily ever after. It’s truly sickening.
I can’t handle the reality of life and certainly not the reality of dating to find the imaginary One.
I’m hopelessly obsessed with love and I don’t want to be.
Could use a hug.

No. 558102

This Bill typo just made me picture a room full of guys named Bill

No. 558113

>manchild who plays video games all day, never helps with household
>but somehow has job, pay bills, is attentive and faithful
Kek bitch you want a fish that don’t drink and a dog that don’t shit as well?

No. 558127

i think i peaked in high school. i have a clinical doctorate degree in a very practical med-related field that i have no interest in. whenever i think back on my greatest accomplishment, it's getting a "very well written…" on a creative writing assignment from my english class in junior year, when i had a very challenging teacher. i basically soared through college (minus physics, which i didn't give a shit about lol). i haven't cared about anything but writing, which i gave up as soon as i went to college.

the sad thing is that i know my future career is much better, much more stable, and will give me good research and teaching opportunities in the future. i just hate it

No. 558135

I literally live this life and it's not too bad. (If you find the right guy, that is. It's easy to be abused by these type of people.) It's only frustrating when I leave town and come back to a filthy-ass house.

No. 558139

fuck you

at least you can become a model if you really wanted to

I will never have that chance.

No. 558141

My issue with being 5'4 (which I realize is petite and not that short) is that I weigh 120 yet still have thick thighs that make me look even shorter. It's like there isn't enough me to spread that weight around evenly. It could just be my frame (pear shaped). My other issue is that I am in my 20's and still get mistaken for a freshman in high school. I work in a very professional field so it's annoying to be undermined/not taken seriously because I'm smaller.

No. 558143

This freaked me out to read because I swear I could've written it exactly. Been maladaptive daydreaming my entire life. I can't remember a time where I didn't do it. And unfortunately, a lot of my daydream scenarios are embarrassing romance fantasies usually centered around a celebrity or someone otherwise unattainable. And sure enough…Hozier has been one of the latest ones. He's just such a beautiful singer/lyricist and seems like a really nice, genuine person - operative word being seems.
I can reason out why I do this all day long. I know I'm just projecting qualities I like or desire in a person onto someone who appears to embody them, but I can't seem to stop myself. I feel pathetic even typing this out.
Hopefully you can at least take some comfort in the knowledge that there's another person out there doing the exact same shit

No. 558144

do any other tall yet clearly conventially unattractive anons get a little weirded out by comments that "you could be a model"? i know this is such a silly thing to say but it's so weird when someone says that when i clearly have self harm/trashy tats all over me and am just generally strange looking. i get that it's being nice but it always makes me feel bad because no, i couldn't and i very obviously couldn't so why say it? can anyone relate or am i stupid

No. 558145

it's not pathetic to have romantic daydreams lmao

No. 558147

my boyfriends long quarantine hair and mustache are not attractive to me and it's making it difficult for me to kiss and be intimate with him :( idk how to talk about this without making him feel sad bcuz he loves his mustache but I hate it

No. 558151

lmao anon i feel like i can relate in some way; i'm not hot enough to be a model but i'm also 5'8 and had a pixie cut for awhile, so i got a lot of "lmao u look like a man" or "lol ur so brave…" comments

i'm not particularly feminine, i'm just tall and skinny with an average face. people don't respect me more for my height, which isn't even out of the ordinary but is still somehow too tall

No. 558152

gently caress his mustache for a second to distract him before ripping it off in one go

No. 558153

I feel like I have them way more often than is normal or healthy. That's why it makes me feel pathetic.

No. 558165

Don't be a dickhead about it but you should definitely just be honest and tell him you are turned off to the point of not wanting to be intimate. I doubt he cares more about his stache than his penis.

No. 558170

I kinda want my old job back. I’m too lazy and keep procrastinating about updating my resume and LinkedIn account as I haven’t fully accepted the fact that I got fired yet.

I wish they call back and say “anon, we have new projects and we would like to give you your job back, do you accept?” after the quarantine is over, but I doubt it.

No. 558183

He definitely seems that way…god knows we would probably be let down. Never meet your heroes.
Daydreaming like this makes real life hit so much harder. Everything and everyone seems so bland and disappointing in comparison to what I think about. Even/especially myself.
I just feel stunted and dumb.
Anyway thank you. Let’s pray for our little maladaptive hearts.

No. 558187

Yes. I’m 5’10 and muscular. If I lose weight you can see my bones and I look like a manly Gollum. I’ve had the model comments since I was a tall child but I’ve always been weird looking so it’s patronizing as hell.

No. 558204

Maladaptive daydreaming anon here too.
I think the gist of mine are centered around romance and someone with a status (usually actor or singer) to show off.

I guess I kinda hate how “bland” I am compared to talented people, even though I’m neither stupid nor untalented, I always want to be an extreme something (Really smart, really good at something, wowing people with it or becoming extremely rich) or being associated with someone with those traits.
Kinda lame I guess but I’ll never let it out outside of an anon board.

No. 558205

my maladaptive daydreaming is out of control and always has been. At this point I'm not even aware I'm doing it until hours have past and I realized I didn't even finish one episode out of an entire season I planned on finishing by the end of the day. The problem with mine is that I have multiple worlds going on at once. There's one that I've had since I was 12 , and there's one that keeps changing with age. They're both realistic. Like another poster said, I also become fixated on a new concept or person and implement it . I literally hate that I'm admitting this but instead of hozier like the other poster said, I've been fixated on joji. I THOUGHT HE WAS UGLY LAST WEEK. Now he's all I can think about and it's wild to wrap my head around.

No. 558208

I feel you so much. It's not like I want to be super sm0l, I just want to be a normal woman. There doesn't pass a day without me dreaming about being shorter and thus more feminine. All the anons saying that this is "overrated" and that we should be proud strong warrior amazons are so delusional. This is the real world, who gives af about having slightly higher chances of becoming a model (sorry I'm no 15yo poor siberian girl about to be sold to sex trafficking) when it means having a shit social life in exchange?
As a child I was never allowed to be a typical kid, I was always held to much higher standards than others because everybody assumed I'm much older, as a teen I got bullied and starved myself to appear smaller while other girls started getting boyfriends and now as an adult I still! get rude comments. And it's not like men respect me more either, on the contrary, they might treat a smaller woman better because they thinks she's cute, no need to be nice to somebody you find disgusting.

>I’m 5’10 and muscular. If I lose weight you can see my bones and I look like a manly Gollum.
Same, gain weight and look like a massive monster, lose weight and look bony and manish as hell.

It's not just general height, it's everything. Your hands, your feet, your head, even your knee caps, everything is different, bigger and uglier than of a woman of average height, there are like a billion tiny things that keep making me self conscious that I wouldn't even have to think about if I was normal.

No. 558211

>shit social life
>got bullied
kek anon, it was never really about your height

No. 558213

>giant baby
Hm what could they have meant by saying that…(don't post about yourself in third person)

No. 558214

File: 1590392903003.gif (406.55 KB, 498x474, tenor (2).gif)

you said it yourself anon, third one down

No. 558215

The world is shitty and shallow and it has rubbed off on you. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll grow up and accept yourself and find a way to exist in this world as yourself. You have no choice. You're the delusional one. Stop trying to be someone else. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Other people's opinions WILL stop hurting if you do the work.

No. 558217

File: 1590393579813.gif (559.03 KB, 236x179, b23e552dc8c860417587f7106f7796…)

>It's not just general height, it's everything. Your hands, your feet, your head, even your knee caps, everything is different, bigger and uglier than of a woman of average height
Anon my sides

No. 558237

Same except 5'2 and 115 lbs. I feel like a gnome most of the time. Trying to get over my fear of gaining weight and make booty gains

No. 558243

i stare at cute guys irl so much, they probably notice too. i'm an awful creep or i feel like one

No. 558244

People can get bullied over anything though. Even average sized women get called mannish if their boobs aren't big enough/have wide shoulders/a wide jaw/waist etc.

No. 558246

What makes a person write that they are going to kill themselves? When I kill myself I have this strong urge for attention for some reason?

I won't see any responses to this by tomorrow.

No. 558255

it's a terrifying thought that is distressing. when you feel distressed, you usually talk about it. don't pretend like you haven't done it yourself anon, come on now

No. 558257

And others don't get bullied at all, even if they have unattractive traits. I definitely remember some 'popular girls' from school who were tall, broad or chubby but fun and likeable so nobody was mean to them, and they certainly got boyfriends.

imo personality and bad luck is what gets you bullied, mostly if you're quiet or awkward or weird and happen to be around particularly nasty people. Appearance is just low hanging fruit when it comes to insults.

No. 558260

You usually don't want to/can't talk about it elsewhere and you just want to let it out/for someone to know even if its in anon

No. 558261

If it’s really out of control, ie negatively impacting your life then yeah it’s time to look for therapy or self train yourself to snap out of it?

I usually keep it in check by “allowing myself” to zone out in places like the bus, shower, walking somewhere, cleaning around or right before going to sleep.

I usually have dumb scenarios going on and “scenes” that I like to elaborate on and replay in my head until they’re perfect. I also often do that with my exes until a new obsession arises. Which is kinda funny because it actually helps me stop thinking about them (by replacing them with someone else kek) but since it’s not rare for some of them to message me out of the blue, I wonder if they do the same thing.

No. 558265

Feeling suicidal doesn't mean you're actually going to kill yourself, it means you're at the limit and you need a change or help quickly or you can't function properly.

No. 558269

I also have maladaptive fantasies, but they're of becoming extremely rich and randomly running into everyone who has hurt me and flaunting my success as I blow them off.

No. 558295

I'v homewrecked at least 3 families by slutting around

No. 558297

Some of my classmates (boys) acted like I was ugly and weird only because I had short hair and resting bitch face. Also probably because I looked older, not sure about it though. At the same time I was getting a lot of positive attention from other men, in their 20's and older (that's why I think that maybe I really didn't look like a teen). Surely there were other reasons why some of my classmates didn't like me - I was introverted, listened to 'weird music', and so on. But the thing is, I wasn't ugly at all.

Bullies at school are mostly conformists and would always look at you through the prism of current beauty standards in their most primitive form. I was in high school around the end of 00's. The most popular girls were glamorous tanning salon habitues with dyed blond hair.
Sometimes it's not even about standards, an insecure person will taunt you just about anything that makes you stand out in any way to feel better about themselves.
Sometimes it's being done because their own self-esteem is threatened by something that you have and they don't. For example, you're smarter or more individualistic. They realize that they won't really accomplish anything after school and it makes them jealous of someone who most probably will.

TL;DR school sucks, bullies are losers

No. 558302

Not meant to be race-bait but I honestly don't care if I'm an affirmative action success at this point. I would feel terrible about it when Asian or White people talked about how it gave me an advantage in applications.

I finally just learned that to some people I'm always going an affirmative action hire or student, so I might as well prove that I deserve to be where I got regardless.

Legit some guy in highschool implied I would get into my choice college only because I was Latino and a woman.

I think affirmative action can be unfair and I acknowledge that, but when I'm assumed to be only that it's hard for me to give a fuck.

No. 558304

>Legit some guy in highschool implied I would get into my choice college only because I was Latino and a woman.

That's disgusting of him, the next time someone speaks to you should reel off the disparity in education that you would have received just a few decades ago or even the solve rate of murders of Latino women in recent history. So what if the odds are in your favor in college applications? Thousands of women before you lived an incredibly unjust reality, the world owes it to make up for that.
I'm really angry for you anon. It's inspiring that you're dedicated to becoming a good student to show these awful people that you deserve your place, but rich kids whose parents buy their way into college don't make that effort, so don't put too much pressure on yourself for the benefit of others.

No. 558310

This is gross but back in my freshman year of college my first ever bf gave me chlamydia because he cheated and after we broke up I unknowingly gave it to my best friend and he's kind of a slut so it spread around and within a month it was such a big deal the school was organizing std seminars lol

No. 558324

I also do this but with fictional characters, lol. It's been a coping method for me when I go through tough times since I was a kid I and didn't even stop once I got a boyfriend. I used to waste entire days dedicated to my daydreams. These days, it's a little easier to keep in check but it feels really comforting to have my own world to come back to anytime.

No. 558329

> I'm not even aware I'm doing it until hours have past and I realized I didn't even finish one episode out of an entire season I planned on finishing by the end of the day
Nta but same! I watch youtube vids and zone out so much that I can't remember anything from the vids. Weirdly enough Joji has been one of my daydream crushes too in the last few months. No idea why I'm even into him.

No. 558375

regardless of how you or anyone feels about affirmative action, he fact is that it exists and you would be a fool not to take advantage of it.
just work hard and don't doubt yourself.

No. 558376

File: 1590429055484.jpeg (7.57 KB, 192x192, pensivewario.jpeg)

i think i have fuckboy tendencies (due to my attachment/mommy issues). i stay away from romantic relationships because they give me anxiety, but i always end up in some sort of weird gray zone with guys…

>i meet guy/guy dms me

>we start chatting (online)
>both are attracted to each other
>are friendly but eventually start flirting
>develop some sort of emotional relationship
>i lose interest
>guy gets needy
>we fall out

it has become a pattern and while i try to avoid it, it seems to happen somewhat regularly. maybe a side of me seeks it out to feel fulfilled somehow?

therapy is helping a bit, but it's so hard for me to develop deep & strong bonds with people i like, especially if i like them romantically. at some point i find some kind of a flaw and lose all interest and feelings i had for them. it's terrible, because i genuinely stop giving a fuck about them and their feelings.

i know it's a defence mechanism but i feel like i should feel bad for treating people this way, but i don't. this happens with friends too, i push people away, stop caring about them and move on.

No. 558393

I have this bad habit of picking my lips until they're seriously throbbing from the pain and bleeding and biting my nails ever since I was a kid. Tried growing them out so many times but it never works. At least they're not bitten down to the core where there is no proper nail anymore

No. 558405

same anon kek. I like the chase, as soon as I know he is into me I loose interest n drop him. Basically all my sexual attraction goes to 0 once we are fucking lmao

No. 558407

My period was late so I ended up taking a pregnancy test this morning and it came back negative and I started my period too. I know I should be glad since I'm only 20, single and don't really have the money or space for a baby. I'm thankful that I'm not, but part of me can't help but be disappointed. I want nothing more than to have a baby.
I've helped my sister take care of her kids since they were born and I want that for myself one day

No. 558416

What strangers are you sleeping with during COVID? Yikes.

No. 558421

nta but we all have our needs

No. 558425


that's not really an excuse to break quarantine tho lol

No. 558427

Not a stranger, long time fwb
Just because you're single doesn't mean the only people you're sleeping with are strangers/people that you hardly know.

The area I'm at is already opened back up and never had a mandatory lockdown. You can even go in to restaurants and eat.

No. 558433

File: 1590440063642.png (45.84 KB, 376x401, 1517329818296.png)

I recently thought about the value of life and how could things like Holocaust happen. Then I pondered how much should I be paid for me to kill a random person in the world Death Note style. I came up with an answer, 4 000€. Then I thought to myself, "What if instead of 1 random person I'd kill 60 000 000. If I put 60 million to death I could get away with something like 0.1€ per life.

Killing someone for a mere ten cents is just cruel but six million dollars would really change my life. Does it really matter if I kill ten or twenty? I'd feel just as bad for one as I'd do for sixty million.
>But what if you waste it, can imagine the guilt?
That's no reason to let an opportunity pass by.

I can't be the only one who thinks like this? It might seem psychopathic but I'm quite sane. It's just a hypothetical question

No. 558435

The point still stands that your fwb could be going out and fucking anybody, you have no idea what he's got and under normal circumstances you'd still have to worry about STDs and unwanted pregnancies. You're being a fool.

No. 558437

go back to the fds thread with this shit pls

No. 558440

i constantly tease my male friends and then indulge in sexual fantasies including them

No. 558443

god me i get off to bullying male friends so badly

No. 558444

Lmao you sound like a prudish sex ed teacher
Adults have casual sex. You dont have to be in love with someone to have sex with them sometimes you just want to get off

No. 558448

are you 12? anon is saying that fwb is somewhat dangerous normally because you have to be more trusting of the other person than in a relationship.

No. 558450

Clearly you suck at casual sex of you're worried that you're pregnant. I am NOT a prude btw, you just sound like a stupid girl who's going to fuck up her life and bring down an innocent baby into your downward spiral.

No. 558452

I got really into pink pill feminism right before my baby girl was born and it's made me feel guilty AF for bringing her into the world because idk how to protect her from moids

No. 558455

>you suck at casual sex if you're worried that you're pregnant
Lmao, what? You know the only way to guaranteed not to get pregnant is abstinence. No form of contraception is %100, both condoms and birth control fail sometimes. And if you're having sex with the same person, there's a chance you might not use a condom every time, even if it is slightly reckless.
But yes, me having sex with a fwb is me going in a downward spiral.

No. 558458

There IS a form of contraception better than tubal ligation, the arm implant, and I'd highly recommend it if you're gonna fuck around during covid. Because whatever you're using is clearly so ineffectual that you're getting scares. Stop trying to justify your retardation.

No. 558465

go back to fds seriously! some of us live in the real world we go out and get fucked! lmao

No. 558467

Wow, sure showed me! Clearly I recommend strong birth control cause I have no experience fucking whatsoever! #gotem

No. 558470

the hashtag…

No. 558477

The chuuni is strong here

No. 558479

>the joke
>your head

No. 558481

alright anon no need to take your birth control mood swings out on me

No. 558487

sheesh, that baby fever is making you passive aggressive as all hell.

No. 558489

>not being infertile

No. 558505

I'm not a chuuni, I'm serious.

No. 558520

That applies for literally any sexual relationship ever anon. You never know who is cheating and who's not. I'm against FWB but that's a stupid justification. A real reason why anons shouldn't have fuck buddies is because it makes men try less, a lot of dudes with FWB are lazy, slightly misogynistic and think they're too good to put any work in for a relationship even though they live in shitty apartments and work at retail and it's why so many men treat women awfully and expect women to be mommy sex slaves

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