File: 1577239582924.jpg (170.85 KB, 500x335, carVentCleaningAndAirFilterRep…)
No. 498072
File: 1577253372061.jpeg (94.48 KB, 736x732, 1559185358386.jpeg)
>>498054op image sucks anon pls
No. 498078
File: 1577256149927.jpg (122.82 KB, 1920x1080, 1524468854600.jpg)
>tfw won the christmas raffle at my work>take my obligatory picture>gets posted on the gram>looks fucking awfulkill me
>>498072Better than watching two bitches fight for no reason
No. 498094
File: 1577262566949.jpg (112.43 KB, 1024x768, eGZfdYMfASDHh1jFcYtA6PLJi4zLW4…)
I'm so dreading going to see my family tomorrow for Christmas… It's gonna be so miserable…
No. 498098
File: 1577263043037.jpeg (28.21 KB, 360x270, 998F0069-2AB1-4E7F-A1B8-7E24E0…)
I didn’t get shit for anyone this year. We’re moving at a really inconvenient time and all me and my bfs money has gone to out new place. I feel so bad bc I was at my parents earlier and I saw some gifts under the tree with my name on them omg help I feel like a helpless retarded kid just getting gifts and giving nothing back.
Merry Christmas, anons!
No. 498111
File: 1577266152306.jpeg (59.38 KB, 574x366, FAB9BFF4-A05F-4010-92C6-50F789…)
>>498092Amazon is gonna kill us
No. 498116
I'm so fucking pissed rn. A few months ago I talked with two of my closest friends so they could keep in touch again (they were distant for a pretty long time before) because I thought it would be nice for them to be friends again.
Well, they started talking and obviously things were going pretty well…yesterday (Christmas Eve) they decided to have dinner together because they were alone and I wasn’t invited. I had dinner alone too. They know I have no family left and I am all by myself at this point, which makes it worse for me.
What hurts me the most is they both asked me what were my plans and I told them, and they couldn’t even tell to come afterwards to drink something, not even that.
I feel terrible because I know they were together BECAUSE OF ME, if I hadn’t talked with them they would be all alone, as I was. I’m beyond mad at this point and I don’t want to talk to them ever again. I’m tired of being all kind and nice and people acting selfish towards me.
I’m not asking that I was invited to dinner, I’m trying to think that maybe they wanted to spend time together for the time lost but fuuuuuuck, not even after? Just to hang out?
Yesterday I cried like a little child because I feel I’m alone in this world, that I won’t be a priority never for anyone, no one cares about my happiness anymore and it makes me miss my mother, my grandparents, it makes me miss to feel loved.
No. 498135
File: 1577277806259.jpg (52.99 KB, 496x482, fam.JPG)
Another anon joining about being miserable about the festival days.
Today we are going to spend at my uncle's place and I absolute H A T E being there because his place it's just such a fucking mess. He has a daughter (11 years old) that can't be controlled. She is the loudest and spoiled child I've ever met in my life. She screams, she does not listen to anything you say to her and she likes to bully the family dog of them. My Uncle and Aunt know that she is out of control since forever but they absolute do NOTHING about it. On the top of that that my uncle is also somebody who barely listens to you when you talk to him. He asks you all the time the same damn thing, like for example: he kind of thinks that you want to drink alcohol even when you said SEVERAL times that you don't want to. So he goes on every five minutes to ask you if you want a beer. I always end up getting one so he can stop asking me if I want to, but when I don't drink it he asks me why I don't want to drink it. I know it sounds weird but it just PISSES me of every time I'm there. I could write an entire novel why I hate being there but another thing is that I'm sick af right now and being around my fam in that state just isn't too thrilling for me because I'm already drained and tired af.
Now you could think: Anon, why don't stay at home then? It's simple. I work with my said uncle and I know when I don't show up the the fam gathering, he will annoy me the next weeks at work with telling me that I hate the family and such things, even when I have a valid reason not to be there. No matter what I do, it has it's down sides …
And the funny thing is, he will complain about how don't want to be in touch with the fam but he won't respond to emails or so when you write to him lmao ughhh anons I just want to stay at home, recover, eat my christmas tiramisu and play with nintendo switch.
No. 498139
File: 1577279048641.png (132.9 KB, 528x321, 83a.png)
>>498135>I just want to stay at home, recover, eat my christmas tiramisu and play with nintendo switch.Pic related tbh
;_; No. 498153
>>498146I’m so sorry. The same thing has happened to me half the time I take my dog running on public trails. He’s a really high energy breed so he needs it but half the time there will be someone with a pitbull. My dog is extremely friendly with a happy and sweet demeanor, shies away from threats, doesn’t bark etc. Every single time any pitbull is there it attempts to attack my dog while the owners tackle it and struggle to hold it back yelling “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, he’s actually such a sweetheart, this isn’t how he really is!” Even when we stop running well in advance and walk slowly, even when we try to keep our distance, even when I wave and greet the owner in a friendly tone from afar first. They attack. And I’ve seen them attacking each other too.
My only advice would be to try to find a different walking route, and dog park to exercise your dogs at and if you see one of those dogs, don’t go in, or leave ASAP. If you see that vicious dog free roaming again call animal control.
No. 498162
File: 1577289654481.jpeg (45.11 KB, 552x532, AFA56D6E-0D6C-44CB-B8B6-D63F6B…)
I keep having sex dreams about my prof from this last semester. I haven’t gotten any in awhile and he was really nice, engaging, and fun to be in a classroom with. It was super annoying that the light just switched on and my body wanted to bone him. I’m just frustrated because it’s not gonna happen no matter how much I want it to because I know it would end in tears for everyone involved. I just want the steamy dreams to stop so I can stop getting embarrassed when I see him and prevent me from doing something stupid like pursuing. Wish this didn’t make me so flustered, I feel 13 with a crush again.
No. 498220
>>498135I did it! I've survived it!
What a wasted day …
No. 498284
>>498276Yes, some people can be super myopic about it and it's really annoying. I used to live in India until several years ago and have grown tired of people in Western countries pointing fingers at "India and China" as the main polluters. You know why? Because most of the world's population lives there, and guess what, tap water is not drinkable unless you want cholera, and guess what else, most of the population is really poor and can't afford to care.
Those who can afford to care, don't because "it's all the big companies' fault" and "I don't care about being more eco friendly because India and China will destroy the world anyway", and then they run off and buy shit made in India and China and keep driving everything into the ground.
Just download Depop or some shit and stop drinking soda, it's not that deep.
No. 498306
File: 1577343345239.jpeg (56.83 KB, 500x333, tumblr_oiban468zr1rtntdlo2_500…)
My day was amazing. I spent so much time with my boyfriend and all of our loved ones. He gave me some really thoughtful gifts and we both got to have some really good quality time with each other's parents. It felt like my first real Christmas in years. It felt almost surreal, like this is what Christmas has always supposed to have felt like.
One of our friend's Aunt, Uncle, and two cousins were murdered today. He had to make the 911 call. Reality always comes back.
No. 498314
>>498306Christ thats so fucking terrible. I'm so sorry he had to go through that anon.
Its hard enough losing somebody around the holidays to natural causes, I couldn't imagine losing an entire family to a murder.
No. 498344
>>498331And he won't improve. Don't trust any promises because I guarantee he'll sneak if he thinks he can get away with it. I empathize, anon.
My ex of 4 years pulled this shit when we had a dead bedroom. It wasn't just regular porn videos either, it was god damn camgirls which hurt worse because there's the interaction/personalization aspect that made it feel more cheaty. Not to mention sometimes donating to them, while turning around and whinging to my face demanding I make more money cause funds were tight. Sometimes that fuck would be in the bedroom jacking it on my bed when I was sitting in the other room feeling so lonely and undesired. I only found out cause I cracked his chromebook and looked at the history. Even watched porn from his mobile device.
No. 498346
File: 1577366405314.jpg (31.12 KB, 759x604, 1508968269565.jpg)
I get so worked up to dump my Nigel IMMINENTLY and then I just lose all motivation for it. He proves to me everyday he doesn't give a fuck about my feelings or needs, am I scared of hurting him or just lazy/cba with sorting him moving out etc?
I feel so dumb for being annoyed about it but Christmas presents yesterday, he spent about half on me that he did on my sister for our family secret santa, and almost a third of what I spent on him. It wasn't even the stuff I showed him when he incessantly asked what I wanted. He made a big show if getting rid of the postage packaging to hide the receipt enclosed but then didn't bother to take off the internal packaging before wrapping, so left all the price stickers on anyway.
He also a few days ago booked a weekend get away with one of his friends. This is after he told me he had no money or annual leave left to come away with me early next year because of the 3 weekend long stags he's already been on this year. He denies every saying it of course.
Goes without saying I am practically maid of the house. Why am I still with the gas lighting prick? This is just the tip of the iceberg. Guess my standards are so low after coming out of the classic aboosive relationship before him. Ugh.
I was gonna do it after New Years but I really want to do it right now after this past week.
No. 498351
>>498346There's no perfect time to dump him except for now so stop waiting for it, just start separating out your stuff now if that helps.
Do you have friends or family you can spend nye with? If you do spend it with them, start your year right without him.
No. 498353
I feel really awkward about this now but I kind of had a crappy Christmas where I worked on the 24th and the 25th, and yesterday my mom’s side of the family had a party no one told me about…I asked her about it and her reasoning for not saying anything was “you already said you were working that day”
So I was in a bad mood and her presents to me are still unopened. I don’t know if I should wait for her to be here to open them but we have one more family get together today
>>498306Holy fuck that’s terrible. I seriously hope your friend and his family have the support and resources to get through after something that horrifying.
No. 498358
>>498350Thanks, I know. Irony is he was the dude who gave me the strength to break up with my last ex.
>>498351Very true. Luckily there's not much stuff to sort. He lives in the same clothes, 99% of the house stuff is mine as I rented this place before he moved in. Just his PC really. He's have no problems moving back in with his mum who lives 10 minutes walk away.
Idk what I'm scared of. This is such a common occurrence and I always thought I would be strong and take no shit but here we are. NYE would be at my sisters, or my friends are pushing me to have a party here so no worries in that department. Maybe I'm just subconsciously too attached to his Netflix, mans got nothing else going for him. Bar his dick, but god forbid I even see that anymore.
No. 498360
>>498346>>498358Anon, I have been in a relationship like this where I dragged my feet in dumping him for A YEAR because it was never the "right" time - just do it now and save yourself the hassle. Guys think that just because they aren't directly abusing you that you should be happy, and some even purposely date women who come from
abusive situations because we're easier to manipulate. You're attached because you're traumatized and still see him as someone who helped you. Get out and get therapy and avoid relationships until your self-esteem in higher.
No. 498371
File: 1577376531894.jpg (29.48 KB, 424x283, 2018-07-04-16-54-8_cropped_80.…)
I actually hate the uwu sustainable fashion trend, its all holier than thou virtual signalling oh look im saving the world by buying these reformation pants uwu.
And im dreading if it caughts up so low midclass and poor people like me will be stuck wearing the ugliest second hand shit since we can't afford "sustainable clothes" trendy thrift stores, or if theres just no good thrift stores like in many smaller cities, and get bullied for it ala 1980s.
No i can't shill out 100 dollars for a pair of jeans you stuck up fucks, stop guilting me into it.
No. 498373
i think i might have bpd. which is funny because for so long i thought it was the dumbest mental illness ever. but i was reading the symptoms and i have all of them. when i was a kid my older half brother molested me and then my family took me away from that side of the family forever and i haven’t seen him since then. despite what he did i missed him so badly and realized all relationships, even ones with family are temporary. i didn’t consider bpd until i recently got with my boyfriend. him and i have been on and off together throughout high school for nearly 5 years and now that we are both “adults” we are trying our hand at a serious stable relationship and doing things we have never done with each other before. having sex, meeting each other’s families, he posts my pictures up in instagram and shares to people that i’m his gf which he didn’t really do when we were teens. going on real dates and spending much time together. we also text literally all day long. but i can’t let go of some of the shit he did to me when we were at that age. he left me two times and got with some other girls, both being russian for some reason, which has made me paranoid now that he has some russian fetish. he’s majoring in the language and going to russia this summer so i am worried. besides that i’m always worried he will abandon me and i have frequent meltdowns or crying fits about it in my room. if i think of him and his past relationships i feel hollow inside. if he upsets me somehow, didn’t say i love you back or make a correct reply to me, i have an urge to do something awful to him like flirt with a guy or something. i always think about how he will just leave me in the end. when we are together i feel just fine, although we had a spat about those two girls he left me for a while ago when i was at his family home for christmas for 5 days. all he had to say was “they were crazy bitches who cheated on me” but didn’t even think to say sorry for hurting me before or breaking my heart in a way. i tried to act okay, i teased him for dating those girls, they had really stupid instagram accounts and stupid interests which normally my bf and i would look down upon. but really i am hurting. i wish he took my feelings more seriously sometimes. he is really a great boyfriend right now but he is a guy who is not so emotional, doesn’t share his feelings often. it’s hard for me to deal with sometimes because i feel like i’m the one who’s always feeling things and he’s not. last night i peeped at his vk account that he doesn’t know i know about, and went all the way back to when he was dating one of the russian girls. i saw their communications and how he was clearly infatuated with her and i felt so jealous. but then i remember he’s always come back to me every time, i’m the one who has stuck with him the longest. despite everything. for 5 years i couldn’t move on because i felt like he is my soulmate, i won’t find anyone else. i have frequent fits of rage when i think about those girls, sometimes hit myself or scream and cry. i just feel so screwed up in the head. sorry for this long rambling post but this is the vent thread after all
No. 498374
>>498373Many people have cluster B traits, it doesn't mean they have bpd or anything else.
Personality disorders must be impairing your life on a daily basis, it's not just a checklist.
You probs just need a hug tbh
No. 498376
>>498371Nigga save up and shop online. If anything it'll make you have a better sense of fashion since you won't spend it on overly styled frou frou crap with stupid prints and sequins on it.
People made it work before fast fashion was a thing, you're just spoiled. If my mom could be fashionable in 1970s Yugoslavia while being raised by a single mom, so can you. Stop ruining the planet because you're lazy.
No. 498378
>>498376Its 2020 not the 1970s, do you realize how much more expenses people have nowadays? Or how expensive shipping can get?
I buy a stupid ass cheap F21 Top every two months and try to make it last over four years, I’ve been wearing half the same clothes since i was 15.
Do i need to have an emergency saving for jeans if mine rip and i have to shell out 140 dollars that i don’t have just not walk around with my ass bare? Im just scared of having to go through the same judgey bullshit about looking ugly and poor that i had when i was a little kid wearing hand me downs from male cousins.
No. 498384
>>498378Lots of places have free shipping/stuff is so cheap even with shipping the item is cheaper than buying something from a store. Buying a used (usually barely used) piece from a decent brand online costs basically the same as buying a shirt from F21.
It's easier than ever today to look decent without much money. If you dress like a poorfag people are going to see a poorfag no shit.
No. 498390
>>498384I live in bumfuck nowhere not america so yeah no, shipping is not acessible and it will usually cost the price of another garmet.
>>498385THIS. Im Lower middle class, not poor, i can buy a cute 20$ garment every once in a while, i can't even concieve how hard it must be for someone who is actually poor.
No. 498396
I don't want to move out with my best friend anymore but I know if I tell her this she'll be upset. She's not realistic at all about what we can afford and what we have to sacrifice in order to get what we want out of an apartment. I'm so sick of her being uncompromising and thinking that once she finally gets a full time salaried job in her field, that we'll be able to afford what she wants, where she wants. Guess what bitch! We live in NYC! We can't have nice central housing near a subway and markets/restaurants AND 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a balcony (and/or backyard), and in-unit laundry!
Anyway, I went to visit a friend who lives in Staten Island, and the travel over there sort of sucks but I'm willing to deal with it because his apartment (and a lot of other listings in the area that we saw online) are so incredibly nice, while also being so affordable (by NYC standards). I know I can't even suggest it to my best friend because she'll throw a bitch fit over the ferry. I made the commute from his apartment to work today (didn't to do all that travel back home last night) and while it was a lot longer than my regular commute from home, it wasn't the worst thing in the world. I'd definitely be willing to sacrifice a very short commute and easy commute to not live in a place the size of a fucking broom closet while also costing an arm and a kidney. I don't expect her to be willing to put up with the same things I'm willing to put up with, so why shouldn't it be the same the other way around?
No. 498398
>>498378>do you realize how much more expenses people have nowadays?Like what, your Spotify subscription?
>Or how expensive shipping can get?It's literally as cheap as it has ever been. In the 70s if you lived in a small town you were limited to whatever was available there, nowadays you can be a gothic lolita whilst living in Podunk, Alabama.
>Do i need to have an emergency saving for jeans if mine rip and i have to shell out 140 dollars that i don’t have just not walk around with my ass bare?Many companies that sell pricier jeans have a lifetime warranty policy and you can just return them and get new ones. LL Bean, Patagonia, most denim vendors, Fjallräven all replace your stuff for free.
>Im just scared of having to go through the same judgey bullshit about looking ugly and poor that i had when i was a little kid wearing hand me downs from male cousins.Even if you aren't ugly and poor you'll still have people calling you ugly and poor because they're shit people. I grew up in abject poverty and now I have a great salary, and the same people who called me ugly and poor then are calling me tacky and selfish now because I have more than them and don't give them free money.
>>498385But thrifting is great? Nothing wrong with that. You also have Poshmark and Depop if you can't find good stuff at physical thrift shops.
No. 498399
File: 1577384162895.png (173.49 KB, 896x459, n.png)
>>498346>>498331OP from pic related? If so, I'm sorry to hear.
No. 498413
>>498398>You can be a Gothic Lolita while living in Podunk, AlabamaWhich literally means the person buying the clothes has some money and isn't a poorfag
I don't think you know what a poorfag actually is and you're just lumping us with lower middle class individuals assuming we can afford Spotify subscriptions
No. 498416
>>498411>thinks it's completely normal that I cry from pain that's never a flaw that you should accept anon
and tbh same for lack of basic hygiene, that's disgusting
No. 498422
>>498416Should I say something about things like that?
He often showered like twice a day even more often in summer and if he has time and he once sort of implied I wasn't as hygienic or clean because I only shower once a day
But I'm noticing that in some aspects he is also not very hygienic or clean and sometimes I worry about bacteria causing an infection or whatever
Although I also live with parents who are pretty unhygienic and make the house dirty and afaik I haven't gotten sick from that in all these years.. So maybe I'm worrying too much..
No. 498435
>>498427Saving this because I know I'll get a lot of use out of it. The number of anons who come here to post about their nasty, horrible boyfriends is crazy.
>>498430Girl… his bad intentions are not giving you an ounce of respect, and not giving a single fuck about your health or happiness. Stop fooling yourself.
No. 498443
File: 1577394777908.jpg (75.99 KB, 594x643, not my nigel.JPG)
>>498399Bless your cottons anon, if you're implying these posts are the same person due to 'Nigel', it's actually a colloquialism. I don't know where it came from.
>>498360Thank you, I know I'm being a pansy. I've certainly considered therapy, maybe this time I'll do it. Luckily my self-esteem is okay, it's the classic female trap of 'ooh can't hurt his feels'.
No. 498444
>>498439>He doesn't enjoy seeing me in pain he just thinks it's normal >He doesn't enjoy seeing me in pain he just thinks it's normal >He doesn't enjoy seeing me in pain he just thinks it's normal Anon, stop and read this back to yourself. Don't defer to "I just phrased that badly". Think about it very well, and try to make it make sense. I don't think you can.
I'm not gonna say "Dump his ass", since you clearly feel attached to him, but I encourage you to think about whether someone who thinks your pain is normal is someone you would want to spend your time with.
No. 498449
>>498448So, it's not that he goes out of his way to hurt you, he just doesn't think it's worth listening to you about
your own body, or finding a way to actually make things pleasurable for you? He seriously thinks it's normal for you to be in pain and literally crying?
There's no defending this, please wake up.
He sounds like he also unironically believes that hymens leave the body, and that you're not a virgin unless you bleed and/or weep during penetrative sex.
No. 498452
>>498448Ah, okay. So he just thinks you're an idiot and wont listen to you while he's labouring under the delusion that he knows your body better than you. Because that's not a red flag or anything. The fact that he's dumb enough to think a virgin couldn't possibly be familiar with fingering is bad enough.
If you want to be told you should stay with him, you're in the wrong place.
No. 498459
File: 1577396867134.jpg (54.85 KB, 500x500, avatars-000057971461-6btzvv-t5…)
>>498443LOL. Oh, this is where that comes from.
Whenever farmers said this I just pictured Nigel Thornberry.
No. 498473
>>498466Anon, he might have a good heart, but let’s look at this long term - can you truly rely on someone who’s got a double digit IQ? Will he in any capacity make your life easier? Or are you going to forever having to be picking up the slack because he’s dim?
Don’t date retards unless you yourself are a retard and you’ll pool your resources for a carer.
No. 498485
>>498382It is cheating. He is sexually pleasuring himself to another woman.
>>498411>thinks it's completely normal that I cry from pain when he puts his finger in me in the wrong angle and while it's fucking dryjfc. Why are you still with someone who is obviously incapable of empathy?
>>498483If your boyfriend/husband was wanking to another woman who was in the room with him would that be cheating? Just because the woman is on a screen it doesn't make it any different. It's cheating on emotional level.
No. 498491
>>498488Thank you kind anon!
Unfortunately where we took the bus is in the middle of buttfuck nowhere where my boyfriend is from. Greyhound's beyond shit and I wish we could have drove there this year.
I'm fucking freezing right now.
No. 498506
>>498466Yea I'm just gonna say that if you stay will him and call him a literal retard then you must be one as well. Sorry you decide to have low IQ children with him, you're the type to just stay in the relationship even though you hate it.
>>498476Oh wow, the bare fucking minimum, let me guess, Mcdonald's chef?
No. 498507
File: 1577409254771.jpg (66.39 KB, 620x600, 1516204514163.jpg)
The holiday patronizing continues with a member from my family sending me a christmas card. Not to ask how my new job is going, or how I'm feeling, or how I'm doing in general. Not to just wish me a happy holiday and leave it at that. Nope.
He writes to scold me into "reconciling" with my narcissist mother after cutting her off several months ago. She's made her rounds telling everyone who will listen how rotten, spoilt, and ungrateful I am. Playing down her wickedness and making me out to be a petty brat no doubt about it. Not one of them even cares to ask me what happened that night to had finally caused me to pack my shit and be homeless in my car for a couple months afterward. They don't question the situation or her because she's already painted herself the perfect victim, and they don't want to hear my side of matters because that would disrupt their 'correct adults and wrong children' narrative. The ones too far up her ass don't bother contacting me thank fuck, but some are more self-righteous.
This card from my uncle (one of her brothers) is infuriating in particular.
>I understand what you're going through
No, you don't. You lived a cozy life with an intact family unit that never divorced. You never had a biological parent abuse and abandon you. You were heavily favored as a male due to this family's internalized misogyny and rode life on easy mode without ever having to lift a finger, or wash a dish. You didn't have to go the extra mile by having things like perfect manners, perfect grades, and pursuing advanced college education because being male already made you a complete human by default in their eyes. AND you lived in your childhood home with my grandparents (rent-free) until they died when you were in your 50s. You have no fucking clue. Even IF all the former weren't true and you did go through an iota of what I had to, you evidently don't understand well enough to give me my fucking space and respect my decision.
>and it's been hard on you
Yeah no shittin' understatement there, next.
>However, in time I would like to see you reconcile with your mother
I'm not much into the business of setting myself up for more emotional abuse to appease what you'd "like" to see. Again, it's not about my hurt or wants, it's what everyone else in my family wants because I'm the object that belongs to the bitch and I gotta do what everyone else says.
>She is the one person in your life who loves you unconditionally
Alienation and isolation tactic. No one else could ever love me because I am inherently unlovable. It is only through my truly goodly, sweetly, godly mother bitchest who could ever love such a scum like me. Guess it's a slip that my uncle is too stupid to pick up on, but he basically admits he doesn't love me here either since she's the "only one" who could. Even so, her love is not unconditional. Her "love" giving is dependent on how I perform and that's how it's always been, and always will be. She's only in a spiraling panic mode now trying to hoover me back in because she knows she done fucked up bad this time.
>and is always there for you
Except when she's not and she's screaming at me that she has no time for my problems because hers are so much worse than mine. I've learned over the years that she is emotionally unavailable and hasn't been nurturing to me since I was a preteen when I started to gain some individuality beyond her control. If he means financially, also no. The few times in my life when I've asked her for petty financial support she acted like I was robbing her, and afterward I was reminded of my unrepayable debt that I was to show immeasurable gratitude for lest I was an ungrateful wench.
>and is your flesh and blood
Who cares? If anything my life has taught me that my biggest enemies have come from flesh and blood. The kindest people in my life have been complete strangers who owed me nothing.
>We all love you
You sure about that? Is that why, even when we were all pretending shit was good, none of you ever talked to me or bonded with me beyond superficial small talk per protocol at holiday affairs? Or how, even now, you don't seem to give a shit about me without relating it to be about the bitch because all you want back is your sense of normalcy?
He sent $100 with it too. Even though I need it, I want to send it back. It's so revolting to me.
No. 498511
File: 1577411088177.gif (394.35 KB, 305x185, f9e.gif)
>>498443Thanks for not calling me a retard, anon.
No. 498539
>>498531>>498532You have to be at least 18 to post here.
>>498533I agree with this anon.
No. 498540
>>498533no shit anon, i pointed that out
>>498483. anon saying it's cheating is fucking insane though.
No. 498542
>>498533Gonna be real with u fam, I didn't read the context of what anon was replying to just 'porn is cheating'.
Anon's boyfriend shouldn't have lied to her and was shitty for trying to save face by pretending to agree with her about its toxicity.
Porn still isn't cheating though kek
No. 498551
>>498541It's what they gotta tell themselves to get through the day.
Porn has really removed people from a sense of decency.
No. 498552
File: 1577426109317.jpg (415.77 KB, 1194x1194, NzuQV0u.jpg)
>>498549
Anon, I love you. Calm down. It's going to be ok. Those people that don't like you are always wondering what YOU think about them. They may come off as confident, but they truly aren't. This is coming from another black girl. Please, please. Take time off from media. I mean all of it. It consumes us and makes us think nothing will change. People who are passive aggressive / aggressive in public are afraid. They are pathetic and they know that society structured as it is is fragile. It takes psychology. A mindset, and a very strong support system to just get by, day to day.
I've been there, and I struggle with it every day. The way we win is if we continue staying alive. AT least, just to spite those that hate us.
I love you anon, please, find support irl for people to talk to, friends, family, places of worship, even a therapist. Just remember, you are not alone.
No. 498574
>>498399Fuck anon, I'm not the same OP as picrel but that does sound an awful lot like him.
Thanks for your responses everyone, I was desperately looking for some validation.
No. 498583
>>498507Just send him a thank you card that also rebuts all his points just what you wrote here.
Share your side of the story.
No. 498591
>>498373Samefag
>all he had to say was “they were crazy bitches who cheated on me” but didn’t even think to say sorry for hurting me before or breaking my heart in a way. i tried to act okay, i teased him for dating those girls, they had really stupid instagram accounts and stupid interests which normally my bf and i would look down upon. Whatever a guy describes women as
to you he will also describe you as
to others. Ergo, you are also a "crazy bitch" and he would normally "look down" on your interests. Sounds like good riddance
No. 498593
>>498591Honestly since you have sunk your time into this person who "always comes back to you" and makes you feel hysterical - not even sure you have bpd, you say you are talking to him all day long via text, it's pretty easy to push your buttons when you have a direct line in all day. You might even be hysterical
due to this awful sounding 5 year relationship with a Russiaboo who "always comes back to me"
You should be his fuckin' fetish, not some Russian girls who clearly don't even want him. Please look for a new boyfriend.
No. 498597
File: 1577438038403.jpg (48.87 KB, 1280x720, 1477624495903.jpg)
Dating is exhausting anymore. Even after wading through all the nasty married men trying to cheat on their wives, it's still hard to find single quality men who are emotionally available and will make appropriate prioritization for a relationship.
Been seeing this guy for a month now and while he's funny and seems compatible at surface value, he's also got a giant ego and doesn't seem likely to be committal as it's clear he'll prioritize his friends and hobbies over his romantic partners. Who wants it rubbed in their face so blatantly that they come last? I'm lucky to get a 15 minute phone call a day but even that is usually interrupted by him having to put me on hold to do or talk to someone else, while having to cut the convo short cause he's got other shit to do. He used to do this annoying thing where he'd call me and then say that he had to go and he didn't stop until I called him out like 'Retard you called me first.' Okay he's legit busy and has got some major stuff happening right now, yet in that case he was never in a position to be pursuing a romantic relationship with women looking for someone who could get serious then. It makes me bitter. He wasted my time. I know I don't deserve that. So many guys are like this, and treat women like clingy psychos if we expect to be shown interest and interacted with.
No. 498616
>>498514I'm sorry anon, same thing happened to me and more than once or twice.
Just try to think you’re the better person in all of this…if your so called friend can gon and talk bad about you with other friends (not a smart move anyway) it just means they’re fake and mean people…I would never trash talk about my friends with other friends AND (more important) about these petty and childish things…
Tbh I think they may be jealous of you and they’re searching an excuse to say shit about you anyways
No. 498635
File: 1577455526091.jpeg (55.43 KB, 640x640, 1570244704553.jpeg)
Fuck me, my period just came, a week early. I'm running on a solid two hours of sleep so I already feel like shit and I have a mountain of things I need to get done that I'm so fucking stressed over but keep procrastinating and getting my period is just the cherry on the shit sundae.
And I actually have plans for New Year's Eve for once and I was looking forward to wearing a cute new outfit I bought on Black Friday… I swear to god if I'm bloated that day I'm gonna kms
No. 498649
File: 1577458177673.jpg (7.76 KB, 210x230, poster,210x230,f8f8f8-pad,210x…)
I'm so pathetic. I got upset yesterday because towards the end of the day the president gave me a card to mail out. Just a single Christmas card. Everyone in the admin department (plus his assistant) is out on vacation, so I'm the only one left. I regularly mail stuff out but only through fedex because I don't deal with small letters (people usually do it themselves/his assistant handles his mail).
Literally all I needed was a stamp but my supervisor uses a postage machine and has never taught me how to use it (no one else in the office knows how to use it either lol), and I don't know where the assistant hid her stamps. A nice coworker gave me one of hers but I'm so sad that I'm so useless that I can't even mail out a single fucking card properly. I hate emailing or texting my coworkers when they're on vacation because they're on vacation and shouldn't be doing anything work related but I had no choice but to try and ask my supervisor where he kept stamps (if he had any) and while waiting for his reply my coworker swooped in with stamps for me and he just replied 'k' after I told him it was okay now. I just hate it when people reply with just 'k' aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
No. 498688
File: 1577468290256.png (645.55 KB, 720x720, 52A4880D-375D-435B-8D52-CE05E3…)
i’m so painfully lonely. i have quite severe autism and for anyone other than my family who have grown up with my weirdness i have a hard time becoming close to people. i’ve recently been thinking about how much i love singing and dancing and how i’m too ashamed to even dance by myself at home or hum a song for too long, i think it’s manifested into me daydreaming about having a small group of friends who i’m so comfortable around that i can make a dancey/singing group with them, like rent out a space just to have fun and do something we all love together with no judgement. it’s gotten super depressing now because i know in reality that will never happen. i’ve tried finding friends however i’m able (the bumble friends app, joining twitter group chats or discords) but nothing works and i end up feeling even worse about even fantasising about being able to have friends and shared hobbies. i’m so alone and depressed with my life as a whole. i tried to kill myself a few months back and my ex partner only found out because he started pestering me because i was already out of it from the pills i took and i didn’t want my last memory alive to be him being horrible to me so i told him and i ended up in the hospital for three days (i’m an idiot and just took my whole box of sertraline which doesn’t work quickly at all, another thing i beat myself up over because i had nytols next to me as well but didn’t take them because i hate dissolving tablets and i throw up if they dissolve in my mouth) and then seeing the overworked nurses and the patients who were struggling more than me made me ten times more depressed and i lied and said i didn’t want to die anymore. now i want to kill myself again and i’m planning to just take a bunch of sleeping pills near a river i live by and just pass out into that so that no hospital or family members have to find me. my doctors didn’t help me find counselling after i got out of hospital, just gave me a bunch of paperwork and sent me away to do it by myself (which i can’t do because of the tism and my inability to talk to people about serious things) the hospital even tried to prescribe me high dosage sleeping pills because i didn’t sleep for the three days i was there (they thought i had issues sleeping but i told them it was just the stress of being away from home that kept me awake) after telling me that if it was sleeping pills i took in the same volume as the sertraline then i would definitely have been dead
i’m a lost cause and i really think the universe is telling me it’s my time to go
No. 498695
>>498511It's no problem, we're all in this shitshow together.
>>498350>>498360>>498351You'll all be hyped to know a certain someone should be moved out by the time I get home today.
No. 498704
File: 1577471483899.jpg (9.92 KB, 400x400, 1411252506156.jpg)
This ugly fat guy who burned me this past summer after I gave him the proverbial chance recently popped up in my dating profile feed.
I checked it out of curiosity. I hate what he wrote.
After getting strung along, and tiring of his hot and cold communication in July, I asked him the pointed question as to where I stood and he basically rejected me. Cited emotional unavailability for a serious relationship along with incompatibilities he didn't specifically name. I blocked him and unfriended him from my social media. I felt lied to and used. At the time we were dating he told me he didn't have desires such as children. He hated my intimacy and was a pretty cold person, like if I were cuddling with him he'd sometimes flick my nose and tell me to get off as if I was a fucking dog. He treated me like I was clingy even though I was lucky if I saw him once a week and received a text from him every few days.
But on this profile? Oh, he wants a supah sewious relationship now that he's so totally ready for it. Oh, and he loves physical intimacy and touch. Oh, and he might actually want kids now.
I hate this lying fucker. It would be one thing if this were years ago, but I don't buy this guy changed in a matter of months and who knows how long this profile has been around for, maybe sooner than that after I blocked him. It disgusts me so much. It makes me want to create a fake profile just to fuck with him and get his hopes up and make him show up for a date someplace just so I can laugh at the ghost but even temporarily entertaining him with the belief that women would reach out to him is an ego boost he doesn't fucking deserve.
No. 498706
>>498703Water pipes are sketchy? Home Depot's got the hookup apparently! D:
Also, you do realize 90% of your new job is going to be cleaning up animal throw up and animal shit… I mean, I'm just sayin. Grass is always greener and something, something.
>>498688…I don't think you know what autism is. Autistics don't really get lonely in the traditional sense and they don't normally have suicidal ideations either (in fact most autistics tend to be pretty high on themselves).
Your problem isn't that your autistic, your problem is you're a spaz. You get all caught up in fantasy and day dreaming a better life rather than fixing the one you have. Your problem is you hate yourself and rather than deal with the underlying problems and issues that are driving you to that self-hatred, you keep retarding back into easy bake fantasies to float you by, all the while constantly trying to throw yourself a pity party, when in reality your life is actually pretty good… maybe not by comparison to the bizarre, unrealistic fantasies you keep retarding back into… but, on the whole, your life is actually pretty good and you should learn to appreciate what you have, live in the moment and stop giving in to the addiction of escapism.
If you simply got your head out of the clouds for a little bit you could realize how great your life really is and just how much amazing shit is all around you every day. Stop abusing fantasy or you'll either wind up dead or you'll wind up like this…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAk5VfBr53c No. 498710
File: 1577473326707.jpg (28.83 KB, 480x712, 58461408_1034751746722319_4173…)
I feel like a dumb fuckin idiot because studying is so hard and i'm afraid i'll fuck up all my exams in january
i'll read through my notes and think "yeah sure, i get this" but as soon as i have to apply anything i dont get it at all anymore
i should give up on law, im just wasting money, but i love this subject and really really wanna pass
No. 498716
File: 1577475835681.jpg (46.71 KB, 500x413, pjz1gqIzWl1s7xf6h_540.jpg)
Bitches from high-school I've avoided for 10 years found my IG and followed me.
No. 498725
>>498719Thank you, I'll consider that option. Maybe I'll wait a month until they forget about me and quietly get rid of them. I'm actually kinda over it now. I posted in the heat of the moment lol.
>>498720I suspect that's how it happened - yesterday I went out for coffee with my old HS ex because he was back in town and DMed me. In the evening I followed him back on IG (he used to follow me from before but I never remembered to followed him back) I think by doing so I popped up in their recommended since they all follow each other and I was oblivious to the fact.
No. 498752
>>498751Severely brain damaged retarded people get diagnosed with autism and so do people with literally nothing wrong with them.
There is no physical test for autism, the diagnosis is completely un-scientific.
100 years from now, the medical community will look back on the current state of psychiatry/psychology, including the phenomena of autism diagnosis, and view it is a barbaric pseudo-science, and a quackery.
People won't believe that people actually gave them authority or respect.
So you not telling him that some quack diagnosed you with ASD, is no different than you not telling him someone on the internet once called you retarded, because both are equally non-scientific.
No. 498754
>>498752Nta but you seem to have a lot of strong opinions about spectrum diagnosis and the current mental health establishment.
Want to vent about it anon?
No. 498759
File: 1577493424177.png (147.38 KB, 302x302, 150378117757.png)
I've been scammed out of some money and I'm not sure what I can do next. So if anyone has some words of wisdom I would appreciate it. To sum it up:
> be me, slightly overweight and decides to join a fitness bootcamp
> doesn't think much of it since it's highly rated and website states 100% guaranteed they'll give the money back if you don't lose the weight after the bootcamp
> "why not?"
> does the eight week bootcamp
> waits two weeks after and messages them "haha, where's the refund?"
> says I don't qualify for the refund
> none of the waivers I signed say anything about not qualifying or the points needed on the weekly checklists, etc
> screenshots the website and tells them where it says money back 100% if you don't lose the weight
> they tell me I'm wrong and edits a portion of the website I didn't send them as proof and says it's point based but never tells me about the amount of points I needed
> I'm fucking furious at this point
> They haven't replied back to my response back about the points or their website change for the past week and a half
I messaged my bank but they can't guarantee the money back as the gym was smart enough to do it in small payments starting from September so it's too far to get all the money back but I'm so bitter about it especially after being in such a rough financial situation and was really hoping on this full refund. Should I just accept my loses or bring up hell? I can't really do anything legal as obviously that's just more money than it's worth. Thanks for your help in advance, anons.
No. 498763
>>498752Thanks anon. This made me feel a little better, even if I don't entirely agree with you.
>>498753Why would I put a blame on someone else for my own neglectful behaviour?
>>498757Thanks anon. After reading that anon is considering to dump her bf bc he confessed he is autistic (on /g/), I've started to think that maybe he would feel like that too. He wants to eventually have kids, and since autism is genetic, they would have higher chance of being autistic. I feel so dumb now. I've never thought how my disorder may affect him and our relationship.
No. 498764
File: 1577495080675.jpg (39.07 KB, 360x460, -1.jpg)
Tiny livestreamers can be salty as fuck and I do not understand how they can be so clueless. They'll act like this and still feel so deserving of an audience for mediocre gameplay and dialogue. The fuck is going on in their heads? Nobody wants to hear you bitch about low view count for 4 hours, they literally all do this. I don't know why I browse through this hellscape of entitlement for entertainment.
No. 498775
File: 1577497827626.jpeg (246.98 KB, 1680x1662, 7799B0C5-48DB-4D26-90F0-D6E2AE…)
My boyfriends cat died today under the bed while i was asleep, how do i cope when im just crying every 10 mins and wanna die. Send help.
No. 498777
>>498767Aw man anon I feel your pain. I have chronic constipation, which eventually resulted in hemorrhoids. Every time I poop it's like I'm passing gravel, and I bleed about half the time.
No matter what I do, I have issues. Exercising, drinking more water, nothing. Plus I'm tiny. I only weigh 105 pounds.
My fucking doctor's response was to just say, "welp yeah that's just happening because you're a woman, suck it up." I didn't believe her at first, but literally one of the "risk factors" on WebMD for constipation is "being a woman." What the hell kind of crap is that!? Clearly there's something more to it than just "being a woman" because plenty of women out there don't deal with this shit.
No. 498803
>>498796Uh, how are you talking about this like your hunger is the issue? How about having an
abusive asshole of a boyfriend who is pressuring you to stay off MEDICATION and maintain an underweight BMI? Fucking hell, love yourself.
No. 498820
File: 1577507617045.jpeg (222.92 KB, 1152x956, 53DACC3B-B2B2-40A7-A67F-0FE598…)
Just stop giving it attention. The poop will get scooped up soon.
No. 498833
File: 1577509539243.jpeg (99.36 KB, 1024x573, 591331B4-171A-4FC2-9085-1FE917…)
I want to hurt myself even though I know I fucking can’t
No. 498840
File: 1577512932915.jpeg (37.89 KB, 512x397, 3F2E30BB-8ADD-4961-9074-F58010…)
so it was a scrote in the thread the whole time, i was wondering why a bunch of retarded, self important unsaged spergs started happening. cry more about how big brained and smart you are namefag, we all needed something to laugh at
No. 498842
>>498775Omg that's so horrible, im so sorry anon. Was he/she an elderly cat? Did they appear sick?
My cat died earlier this year at age 16, had him since i was in 1st-2nd grade. We've gotten 2 cats since but they'll never replace my little baby. Im really sorry for your loss, i hope you'll eventually move on. Losing a pet is just heartbreaking.
Also what's with the scrotes popping here? Mods better get to banning
No. 498862
File: 1577523634807.jpeg (54.48 KB, 610x457, 1B262F1D-CE2F-4624-AD48-E958F0…)
>>498842He was only 7 but definitely had cancer of some sort, we just didn't find out until it was too late. He passed 4 days after going to the vet so we didn't have a chance to help him.
No. 498866
File: 1577525205158.gif (3.23 MB, 500x281, 1558289996257.gif)
knowing that how little i know and how it is to learn things sucks. im not unwilling just have a fuckin learning disorder sucks. i try really hard but my boyfriend is so much smarter than me. hes a physicist. i guess thats my insecurity..
No. 498906
>>498888>My mother keeps dragging me for being a kissless virgin Your mother sounds like the actual asshole here anon.
How can she think that you being how you are has nothing to do with her and her ability in raising a fucking human being.
Also, being kissless and etc has a lot to do with self confidence which it's kind of hard to develop when your main caretaker drags you for behavior that's most likely a coping mechanism you adopted to deal with your environment.
Don't be so hard with yourself and it's ok to feel angry with your mom, and not yourself, if she makes you feel bad.
No. 498910
>>498903>>498905comrades
>>498906to be fair, she knows it's her fault as well, but instead of simply not talking about it she keeps insisting on it, then goes and says I'm too sensitive when I ask her to stop. Like duh? Am I just supposed to take it and laugh at the third joke about it today? No way.
No. 498913
>>498910>says I'm too sensitive when I ask her to stopWhat an ass. So she just disregards your feelings and gaslights you into thinking you are "too sensitive"? That's a very narc-ish behavior. My parents always dismissed my feelings and requests like that also, but after living with other, normal and respectful people, I realize that when someone says you are too sensitive they are just trying to manipulate you in feeling guilty because they can't respect boundaries or you as a normal human being that's able of getting hurt if ridiculed.
You are not too sensitive anon, if anything it's your mom that's too sensitive getting
triggered over someone not liking to be the butt of her jokes.
No. 498914
>>498904I live in a pretty bad area so the chances for it happening is greater than average, and maybe I am a bit paranoid. One time when I was going home around 1am this dude came up to me and complimented my looks and asked where the train station was, so I pointed him towards the road as you literally just had to walk down it to get to it. He then said he was blind and asked if I could lead him there (???? he complimented me how I looked what???).
Another time a dude got up into my face and asked me to suck his dick and then grabbed my hand and tried leading me away from my buss. So I think it's reasonable I am paranoid.
No. 498921
File: 1577552935550.jpg (65.41 KB, 800x800, product-image-978105388_1024x1…)
>>498916guns are a great way to have your own lethal weapon turned against you. fucking stupid. if anything, a taser or stun gun is preferable, or mace or even those cat keychains that are like brass knuckles. anyone who jumps to "gun" is terrifically shortsighted and overestimating their own ability, and the abilities of others.
No. 498966
>>498054I have a man who is interested in me who is just checks all the boxes; he really sweet, loves my body and doesn't care about my flaws, great dick, he is handsome and fit, artsy, we share similar interests in everything, understands me very well, knows how to please a woman, and we grew up in somewhat similar situations so we can really relate to each other's issues. He is just the obvious choice but I can't help but fantasize about a loser unathletic wimp who doesnt appreciate me nor my body while he has one of the smallest dicks I've ever seen in my life, has anger issues, still dependent on his parents, faps to hentai, and is close minded conservative who thinks pubic is repulsive.
I still think of the first guy when I masturbate because I experienced best of my orgasms with him but I still catch myself fantasizing about the second nerd through the day it fucking kills me, how can I stop daydream about someone I don't even want to be with?
No. 498985
I detest my mother.
She has always compared me to other people whom she perceived as better and made me feel like as if life was a freaking race I had to win. I never felt good enough. Even now, during Christmas dinner she was spewing the usual things 'X and Y are already married and popping out kids' (…I am their age and single), 'Z has a masters degree' (…I don't), 'W bought the latest ipad for her mother' (…I bought her a cheaper Samsung one, because that's what I can afford). Like a broken record.
If you behave the way she wants you to, you're a good person, you're loved, and if you don't, you're bad and she will criticize you until you do what she wants.
She also bullies her ex-husband she is supposedly taking care of and tells him he is free to commit suicide (he's depressed and constantly says he wants to die), but if he does, he shouldn't do it in her house but go somewhere far so the police won't harass her later with questions. She has no empathy.
It took me some time (and several therapists) to realize that my depression, general feeling of inadequacy and suicidal thoughts can all be traced back to her and the way she 'raised' me.
No. 499011
>>498999Omfg it’s crazy how many nice kids grow up to be criminals or dangerous, everyone swore that when I was a teen, I’d wind up in jail or whatever when I grew up or a crack addict, prostitute, delinquent, whatever, but no I turned rather boring I’m a mom who likes to knit and works a boring office job, but as a kid I snuck out of class a lot, smoked and drank, ran away a few times, etc., I don’t regret any of it, and I bet you those dumbasses who would say I wouldn’t become anything other than a street rat are eating their words.
No. 499050
>>499015im into true crime but Ted is the basic bitch of the true crime community. Anyone overtly interested in his story is lowkey admitting they only find it so fascinating cuz he was a ok looking white guy and his
victims were "beloved in society" white girls
No. 499101
>>499095I think I worded it badly.
I have no issue with the game, just creeped out by anyone who's an adult especially going after the way young characters. It's weird. I self insert in most games, but stop it when I'd be self inserting to pretend to date kids.
No. 499120
>>499106Anon is saying it's creepy because it's an adult roleplaying that they're dating teenagers, regardless of how old the main character is.
I see anon's point, but it's a weird area. I don't think there's anything wrong with enjoying stories with younger characters. Plenty of popular stories are written about teenagers who have romantic situations with other teenagers (Hunger Games for example). Most fiction involves some self-insertion by the reader. It's not necessarily an issue unless your bf is constantly playing dating sims with high schoolers.
No. 499124
>>499093Unless he is specifically fixated on her youth, I don't really think it's an issue. I'm not familiar with the game but I googled her, she could be literally any age from 13-30 by anime design standards. I wouldn't be able to guess her age because any attractive young girl in anime is drawn the same way.
I mean, most men would be totally fine with fucking 15 year olds as long as they didn't get caught/punished, so I'm not saying he isn't a pedo. Statistically he probably is, so I would keep an eye out for more red flags. But anime is just too vaguely drawn (loli/shota aside) to be sole proof of it.
No. 499144
>>499093>>499124>>499130Is your boyfriend obsessed with the character or talking how he would like to date her for real? If he is not into some weird waifu business, you are getting angry for no reason and misunderstanding a situation. Dating characters in rpg or visual novel games (excluding bullshit like Love Plus) is all about enjoying the story and not pretending that you are in a relationship. Would you get mad at your bf for watching a romance movie? If he's not a waifuist creep about Futaba or her being 15, there is nothing to worry about.
When selecting a route, you are just deciding which kind of story is the most interesting to you and which character you like best. Doesn't mean that you want anything to do with them outside the experience.
No. 499156
>>499148gardening, playing the guitar, magic tricks/cardistry, and we do crafts together. and being so disrespectful as to talk about dating other women is not an interest, and failing to do so does not make someone less interesting or well rounded. it just makes them somewhat emotionally intelligent.
>>499149hopelessly delusional thinking if you think most men aren't self inserting. it's possible he was just talking about it to her in terms of his character and anon overreacted, but either way, i can guarantee he's self inserting, regardless of how he was speaking to her about it. men basically always self insert, and the likelihood of it goes up tenfold when it's a game about taking your pick of sexualized anime girls in shorty shorts and tiny outfits.
No. 499194
File: 1577629859919.jpg (58.26 KB, 635x846, 1516049503146.jpg)
>>499190The disrespect is palpable. That's not just a useless man, that's a downright bastard.
>>498695Following on from this, my man is now out the house after a mutual agreement but is refusing to tell me where we stand. I'd be happy to try and work on it if he'd suggest some keenness but the two messages I've sent (are you collecting anymore stuff and do you wanna talk (he told me his brain was a mess)) haven't been replied to in any reasonable time frame with anything more than a few words. So I guess that's a no go, just wish he'd say so I can just begin moving on.
In a farcical turn of events, I walked in to my small town today to get a few things I'd forgotten yesterday. I looked like a rat because who am I going to see in a small town on a Sunday? First shop I enter, who do I end up stood behind, the ex boyfriend I haven't seen since we broke up two years ago. With his girlfriend. They ended up hanging around in the aisle I wanted. Feels like I'm in a fucking romcom, complete with a soundtrack chosen by Spotify as I dodged through the aisles.
No. 499243
File: 1577644899149.jpeg (81.84 KB, 933x933, 1570525585384.jpeg)
>>499237yes, and who devises the campaigns and lobbies for policy meant to pit the poor against themselves and the .00002% people left in the middle class, against the poor? who creates decades long anti-union propaganda, supports union busting, etc, so there is no fucking middle class?
No. 499244
>>499237Rich people suck lmao
I mean most white people are rich bc their great great grandpops owned slaves or factories with inhuman conditions that employed pregnant women and children, oopsie.
If they got rich recently ie 70s-90s they have ties to organized crime, then if you got rich in the 00s because of the internet you probably have ties to pedos.
Most decent rich people are doctors and even then using your so called heavenly good will and need to help people to make millions when there’s people who can’t afford medical care is just disingenuous.
No. 499245
>>499237If only the only thing the poor had to worry about was what was being said about them…
I hate rich people and I'm not even poor, they're genuinely awful and/or spoilt, any form of philanthropy they do is either for posturing or tax breaks, or both.
No. 499257
File: 1577649113221.jpg (43.59 KB, 680x685, s9tr2jo4nx811.jpg)
I can't tell if I wasted my youth or if I'm just afraid of change. Everything in my life is going pretty well, and yet I find myself wishing to go back and keep reliving everything over and over again forever.
My lack of experience has also made it hard to accept that I'm no longer part of the younger generation anymore (although I am on a technicality, I'm an old zoomer). I've never partied, used any substance including alcohol, or dated anyone. It feels as if I'm emotionally stuck because of it, especially the latter (the former two I never want to do anyway).
Idk I've just suddenly become so reflective lately and it's scary since I've never been this sort of person. Thinking of the past has always made me anxious and now I'm in fear everyday, yet I cannot stop.
How to get rid of sudden onset chronic nostalgia?
No. 499264
>>499243Right, because every single rich person ever is involved in doing that and not a handful of exceptionally powerful people.
Also, can we ditch the "pitting poor people against each other" narrative as if we're all a bunch of helpless mindless sheep who have no power to keep ourselves from falling
victim to Fox News brainwashing?
>>499244>>499245>>499249You might wanna take a break from the Chapo subreddit.
No. 499278
>>49927325 is a baby still. Your idealistic beliefs of "wasting youth" are going to keep letting you down if you don't let them go, many people have shitty youths but obviously those aren't fun stories so we don't hear about it.
You have plenty of time to work on yourself, start now and keep going
>>499257Also the same to you, you're not dead yet, stop acting like you're a 90 year old who gave your whole life to coal mining
No. 499280
>>499262>>499262Go live and pretend bad things are just conspiracy theories then, Ignorance is Bliss.
>>499264>>499264Not Every Single Rich Person Ever, but a vast, VAST, majority.
I know plenty of rich people (about 10) whose parents have some hands on the narcotics business.
Im personally not a leftist but you gotta be retarded if you think people got such money doing things morally and in the law.
No. 499312
>>499293Are you joking? Have you ever had a job in your life? Half a million net worth is barely middle class for a family. That might buy you an average house in my low socio economic area if you're lucky. Millionaires are nothing special anymore, it's comfortable and well off but far from rich, letalone unreasonably rich to the point of being a bad person.
Bilionaires and millionaires in the upper 8-9 figure range shouldn't exist, that is hoarding money and is more than anyone needs in a lifetime. But up to, say, 10 mil or so is not unusual for completely normal people with good jobs and investments.
No. 499313
>>499306>implying people can just “have decent salary and good at this investment” without getting in bed with bad people I guess being worth half a mil is only decent, fucking poorfags imirite?? Wish they’d just
get a decent job and make good investment!!… Lol wanting to live lavish is one thing, all the salty anons in here want it. But take your tongue of that boot.
>>499303Today on “All observable facts are lies”.
No. 499315
>>499313I honestly have no idea what you mean by 'getting into bed with bad people'. Like, it's morally wrong to, for example, work for Amazon or own Amazon shares because it's run by a bad person? Because it sure af doesn't require direct involvement in any corrupt or unethical practices.
Literally nobody is blaming poor people for their situation, what a dumb strawman. The existence of well off people isn't in inherent insult to people with less money.
No. 499317
>>499313>implying it's impossible to have a net worth of 500k without being a criminal>implying anyone who points out otherwise is poor bashing
>Today on “All observable facts are lies”.Lolrite. Because it's so totally believeable that some random low income anon casually knows 10 millionaires, all in the drug trade and open with her about their criminal enterprises. How could anyone question the validity of such a claim?
Clearly I am not debating a rational minded person, so I will be on my way now.
>>499312I agree with you. These anons simply don't live in reality. This is what happens when you spend too much time on the Chapo subreddit.
No. 499322
>>499316No shit they have a mortgage, which will eventually be paid off, and at that point they have an >500k net worth and become evil according to you. Who tf has 500k sitting in a bank instead of invested somehow? Why would I assume that is what you mean?
I said middle class, not average. The average person might not be middle class. The median net worth in my country is $558k.
No. 499404
File: 1577688819807.png (10.15 KB, 132x125, whathrefuck.png)
I keep jumping from shit relationship to shit relationship. I used to be with a neckbeard-type who was sociopathic tier and couldn't be bothered to give a minimum fuck about my problems. Now I am with a mentally unstable scrote who has now recently come out of the closed to identify as a troon (after we got together of course). This one pretends to be the sensibluwu type to give a shit about my problems so I keep giving him minimum attention in exchange (bc that's as much as I am disposed to give him, fuck that shit, not even nudes) and when I don't he throws temper tantrums on social media about how lonely he feels and how life is definitively not worth it and literally everyone omg is a fucking bitch to him until I confront him and he pretends all his shitposting wasn't about me and goes back to his former extremely clingy self with his cringeworthy lovebombing. I could buy into this one's I CARE SO MUCH ABOUT UUU UWU bullshit if it wasn't because he's clearly another pushy type who only wants me to get into the stuff he's into and then couldn't literally give less shits about the stuff that interests me ('cause remember: women exist to pander to your needs and interests. Anything they may be interested in their own is irrelevant to you and not worth even a try). This fucking self-absorted motherfucker can't even be bothered to watch some fucking meme or pet videos I find funny so we have virtually something else to talk about aside from sappy emo bullshit and his 15 year old tier lovebombing posts but he's so deeply stuck inside his own arse he can't be bothered to do this very bare little minimum.
This one is (luckily) a LDR (and I'm talking about a HUGE distance) so as soon as I'm partnered irl I can run away from this psycho but holy shit. Before you guys ask, they were both years long friendships who seemed to be safe to my young adult innocent self compared to the crazy amount of scrote fuckery you can find on the rest of the net. What the fuck. I am fucking disgusted. If this is what I can expect from the males I've been friends with, then what can I expect from the ones I don't even know yet??
No. 499497
File: 1577731390096.jpeg (6.49 KB, 225x225, images (3).jpeg)
Over Christmas one of my pen pals shot me a dm basically asking to talk because she hasn't had the easiest time emotionally lately. I already kinda knew, but in any regard I sent her back a message that was pretty schmaltzy itself but totally good intentioned. Basically left the door open for anytime she needed me to talk about anything. That's what a good friend does.
She never replied and it has me a little anxious. Upon rereading her message, it kind of seems like she might have sent it to the wrong person. There's certain word choices and tells that would indicate she meant to send this to a local friend, not someone living several seas away. I'm not sure if that's the case or if my mush scared her off. Either way I hope she's okay, I wouldn't be offended if she unintentionally sent me that last message, the radio silence is what gets me. I really want to know if she's okay without making her feel pressured and pryed upon.
No. 499500
File: 1577732015877.jpg (21.85 KB, 275x274, 1574119266473.jpg)
my bf broke up with me like near our anniversary and christmas. he couldnt accept my ''bad side'' like me being really depressed , for him its apparently too much so he decided to break up with me whilst when he was really depressed i got him out of it and i sacrificed myself for him to just get better. so i feel like i was really used and feel like shit. 2 years wasted , because hes really selfish. its like he didnt love me at all
No. 499526
File: 1577742396581.jpg (64.28 KB, 500x378, 1550776480948.jpg)
Two friends from my circle are hosting opposing nye parties and it's making shit complicated and super inconvenient. For one thing, they both live in completely opposite directions, if I want to be a nice friend it would require an hour's commute just to hit both spots. I also have gifts for all of them so unless I wanna pay stupid postage, I need to see them and hand the gifts in person.
One friend hosts a nye party every year at her place under the excuse that it's her hubby's bday. It's alright, but she never lets anyone else the opportunity to host. It's pretty much the same ol. Which is why this different friend wants to throw a party at her place this year. I was on board with it until I looked at her guest list and discovered she invited the guy that literally fucked me over. The tldr is that she introduced me to this dude trying to get us together, but he turned out to be two-timing me with his gf while telling everyone else I made him 'uncomfortable' even though he was doing shit like sending me dick pics and fucking me. He lured me into a false sense of security by telling me they weren't really together, which turned out to be part of his elaborate scheme. He's some rich boy with status, so my friend is still friends with him because she knows him through her husband's work which…kinda hurts my feelings considering she knows the truth about what happened. Just because he's invited doesn't mean he'll wind up going, he's extremely anti social so at least I have that in my favor. But if he showed up it would honestly ruin my night. I really don't want to see that guy ever again. When he blocked me I thought it was over, but I just checked and he unblocked me so I really hope I'm not expected to "be cool" about this. There's this pit of disgust in my stomach thinking about it.
I wish it were as simple as inviting my date to the aforementioned party so I wouldn't have to potentially face him alone, but he already made plans to go see a band in a different city with his friends. I pretty much got left in the dust this year. We haven't been dating for that long so I can't force him one way or another to stay with me. I really want someone to think about me and treat me special, but it's not happening. I'm not sure what to do.
No. 499576
File: 1577752856880.png (825.01 KB, 730x1373, 1568943012211.png)
Getting ready to flush this dude I've been seeing who treats me with ambiguity and passive aggression. Acts like he's so "busy" all the time and can never commit to any plans with me. If I can peg him into a plan, he constantly changes it last minute. I'm lucky to get an hour's visit from him once a week (to fuck, of course) and maybe 15 minutes on the phone a night, but only at the very end of the night before he must abruptly go.
I have zero idea where I stand, and you know what? Fuck it. I shouldn't have to bitch and moan to be prioritized. I should be made to feel happy and wanted, not to feel like I'm clingy and insane because I expect human decency and inclusion from someone romantically and sexually involved with me.
He's future faking me. He keeps going on about how I caught him at a busy and wild period in his life, the implication being that this will get better but it's not showing any signs of improving. He's only gotten worse. If he's comfortable treating me this dismissively after only a month of dating then who knows how worse this will get. He didn't start out this way, because he wouldn't have gotten this far and have gotten laid if this were the way I knew I'd be treated or had he been this much of an asshat to me off the bat. He routinely chooses his buddies over me and I'm way down the list. Worse than being made to feel like an option, I'm basically a standby. He didn't even think to ask me about my NYE plans, and he's spending it with his buddies anyway. He actually had the audacity to point a finger back at me when I got upset about it, "Well you didn't ask me first." As if men who are actually interested in women wait around to be asked by them for plans. Cop out. He's going to be with friends because that's who he values in his life, not me.
So once again I have to pick myself up, deal with the fact that I was tricked, and try to move on in this lonely world. I'm just so sick of it.
No. 499580
File: 1577754001738.jpeg (33.42 KB, 564x564, A0F41051-8590-49FC-92CA-15D826…)
My Dad walked in on me getting dressed for bed with my earphones on, and I was fucking dancing. And badly at that. He quickly left and apologised but FUCK if I don’t feel intense embarrassment.
No. 499598
>>499586Oh man I know so many people like that from an organization I was in in college. I met a lot of great people through that group but also a lot of shit, and they did the same thing where they were very well liked by members outside of our chapter but pretty much despised by everyone who knew them. One continues to be super emotionally
abusive to every partner she has, and the other was constantly cheating on her long distance SOs and then telling them it was sexual assault. We all knew that she wasn't sexually assaulted because she always cheated while drunk at parties, and several times I had to look after her sober and try and pry her off whatever flavor of the night guy she was trying to bone. Everything looks perfect on social media for them but in reality they've both ended up alone and depressed because of how shitty they've been. They may be getting away with things now but those closest to them will start to fade away once they've been burned.
No. 499609
>>499602They are more concerned with having the image of being a reader than actually reading. Any reasonable person will think like you, that having countless books on one device is a great way to get a lot of reading done. But people won't know what you're reading or see your bookcases with a kindle, and it seems that is vitally important to snobs.
I actually prefer physical books because I need encouragement to read more. It's easy to close a tab and forget or get distracted on my phone, but I'll never forget a book sitting on my table. That's because I'm not a very avid reader to begin with, people who really love reading wont have the same issue.
No. 499626
File: 1577761470920.jpg (69.17 KB, 500x578, DqhEULRXgAAAo-p.jpg)
>>499093you're disgusted at your bf for self inserting because she's fictionally fifteen and not because her dating arc is about babysitting her emotionally stunted, sheltered, naive, and codependent personality?
No. 499677
>>499383Those Facebook pages called Autistic Smol Thicc Loli Goth GF come to mind and a few meme accounts I follow on instagram that are ran by girls, they’ll say stuff like “women aren’t funny haha I agree with you guys!!”
Hate those cuckqueans
No. 499686
>>499685I mean most 22 year olds are also students, just in college instead.
A three year gap is nothing to worry about.
No. 499758
File: 1577804739028.jpg (141.07 KB, 1221x1157, fffffuk.jpg)
I am invited to a new years party at my best friends house but his other close friends will be there and all of them together are so fucking weird im telling you.
They all have this autistic dynamic where they all control each others lives like the romantic, social aspects and literally everything else.
>none have proper jobs, one is on the doll the other two are currently living with their middle class parents and unemployed
>all go to the gym at the same time, always, these men are 26 years old
>when one of them manages to score a partner all others will push for them to break up
>when they do break up that girl will get yeeted the fuck out every social event including them, if the event is not organised by one of them they will try to pressure the organizer into kicking the girl out
I never used to have a problem hanging out with them because we weren't so close? But recently I fell like my so and I have crossed the 'comfort zone' for them and have been accepted into their tribe which is both funny and mostly frustrating and disturbing.
>all three share EVERY SINGLE detail about their kinks and sexual preferences, so I found out that they think lolis are completely fine and apparently normal
>only get mad at women/blame women for any of their failures - hate all female characters in everything ever however they are unable to see the pattern and claim to be 'feminist'
>my friend opened up to me about his sister being molested by some guy, I assumed he wanted advice on supporting her, instead he told me he did not 'trust her' anymore wtf
>i am fucking done with these people there is so much more i wanted to type but just typing this makes me think wtf am I doing I have other shit to do with my life
good rant
No. 499846
>>499845Also I know it’s just a comforter and comes off and super selfish but I honestly wish all of these relatives would drop dead and just the very fact that my parents don’t have the decency to ask/let me know that they’re just giving away my possessions like I don’t exist/have my own use for them really fucking hurts.
Yknow, god forbid my relatives (who dont financially struggle at all) spend any money, but fuck me right?
No. 499850
>>499835Not even like nerd lore stuff? Honestly if he doesn’t read, he’s likely to not think very critically. He probably will never be assed to educate himself on topics that are important to you. He’s probably susceptible to memes and dumbass takes. It shows he has no desire to know more. You know what I’m saying sis
dump him.
No. 499851
>>499849I don't know. Its a really long story so I obviously can't explain everything but its very unlikely I'm ever going to be let go. Like the only way out at this point is literally killing myself but I don't want to upset the same people who keep me here.
Basically the thing is that I'm being forced to pretend to be a small child (I'm 23) and kept from leaving the house (except for small errands or work) and I'm not allowed to have friends or do anything that resembles anything an adult would do. The second I do anything which would indicate me being over the age of like 10 gets me punished in a way that intentionally exploits and
triggers my bpd and ptsd (I'm a
victim of child rape by my father and cousin). I apologize if this
triggers anyone because its quite heavy but I literally have nowhere else to post this. I'm not okay and I can't survive this any longer.
No. 499860
>>499857Thankfully you have the internet and could chat or reach out to someone if you need help. Have you considered just up and leaving WITH your brother?
I truly hope you can get away.
No. 499862
>>499857Look for women’s shelters near you anon. They are trained to help women who, like you, are fleeing from long term
abusive situations with presently little to no ability to be independent. How old is your brother? They’ll likely give you resources to help both of you.
No. 499864
>>499860Me brother wouldn't do that with me because, even though he loves me and is probably the only one here who doesn't deeply detest me in some way, he is trying to live a normal life and is wilfully ignorant of whats going on. He is the only well adjusted and mentally healthy one in this entire family and I don't want him to get involved in this. All I want for him is to move out and go far away and live like a normal person would.
For more context (and also because I need to vent and I know this is heavy as fuck but please don't ban me), my family are extreme rightwingers to the point of being cultish. Basically females are lower than dirt and when I was a very small child I was raped by male family members and also intented to be sold or used in cp. My father died in 2012. My mom is now forcing me to act like a child and keeps me locked up here because she doesn't want to confront the crimes of this family. Its sounds crazy but I swear its true.
No. 499877
File: 1577839764508.png (155.16 KB, 418x344, iui-.png)
Happy new fuckin year. I decided to bake a cake for my family today. I stayed in the kitchen all afternoon, not to mention it was the first "real" cake I've ever made so I worked pretty hard on it. I told my family to wait until it cools down in the fridge and specially to wait for me before eating it. They didn't. When I came back for a slice, they already ate theirs and they even finished the whipped cream I FUCKIN BOUGHT. Like, can't you wait?? Are you that fuckin desperate for a cake??? I hate it. They can fuck each other next year, I won't do shit. I'm so mad.
No. 499952
I'm so fucking tired of my friend, anons. I love her but she can be the most vapid and on the surface person I ever met.
>Always rambles about her personal insights based on her personal experiences and makes intensive theories about them and says this is how she finds her "truths" or whatever
>I listen to her for hours and even engage in the conversation despite it not being my 100% focus or interest because I am polite and like to always know what people like and think about since I'm a very curious and like learning new perspectives, and sharing that interest with them
>When we were discussing gender roles today, I said I find it annoying how women are expected to be super perfect while men have no beauty standards at all. She asked me why do I care about it and why do I get worked up over society's opinions?
>I told her because it's harmful to women and she was like so what, it is the natural role of attraction and she likes rugged men and men don't need to be hygienic and pretty like women do
>She thought me disagreeing with her on this was me being angry and I asked her why does she dislike literally ANYTHING relating to history/society/culture/law/politics and she said because she just doesnt care about it at all and it doesn't effect her personal life. I'm like okay which is why I stopped getting super political with her but saying this little comment I did, I don't feel was wrong?
>She also got annoyed at me and asked why do I care when I said these people in this online community I'm in discuss the same person over and over again. And I'm like.. okay?
>It doesnt make sense because she DOES indeed discuss politics, like gender roles for instance, but she said not in the same way I do and not as angry (meanwhile she rants about how women are sex objects for men and it annoys her, and she is ignored if she is fat/ugly, but also she is turned on by being an object for men and think men should be kingly or fatherly, but a few times said she hates men and wishes they could become slaves for women, but yet me saying beauty standards are too high for women and too low for men is too political/angry)
>She also made a smartass comment that I "shouldn't shave my armpits and legs then if i don't like it".. like what the fuck ? And somehow turned around to saying I am angry about women not liking what I like (lol)
I'm so fucking tired, man. Every little fucking insight I make she just jumps on it or ignores it, like I have to be shallow and limited in what I think about. She even got mad at me and was skeptical because I told her a certain music genre created a music subculture underground for people who wanted to come together and escape to the music because of the political/social turmoil in that decade, even tho this is a well known fact and she told me to stop focusing on history, lmfao.
I'm thinking she might have Borderline Personality Disorder. Considering she has "triggers" for her PTSD and it makes her change mood completely and gaslight and deny and act tox ic as shit at times, which is ironic she said I blame everything on me being mentally ill (I'm bipolar) but she always says she can't do this thing because of her PTSD/Paranoia, like how is it different?
No. 499957
>>499952Anon dump her as a friend, I knew someone exactly like this and she was the worst fucking person to deal with. All of my other friends were constantly walking on egg shells around her. If we ever shared an opinion that went against one she had she would spend the whole night ranting on how we are wrong, how dare we have different views than her, if we tried to debate she would stone wall.
Getting rid of her is best for your sanity in the long run.
(also sorry if this doesn't make sense since I'm drunk)
No. 499965
One particular friend always wants group selfies using those damn meitu/snow apps. She makes everyone look uncanny. The filters she uses pinches our noses, makes us look bruised and deformed with all the weird contouring, thins our lips, and enlarges or shrinks awkward parts of our bodies. It's not exaggerated enough to be super noticeably edited, but it's subtle enough where one would think they took a horrid photo of themselves if they didn't realize the filters. She always looks the most 'flattering' but that's not saying much, these filters actually make her look super creepy as well. Her eyes always look psychotic big, and when she grins with teeth she looks sharklike from the mouth enlargement, She just comes out with the best of it because she has control of the editing and touches herself up the most.
It's not a big deal in the grand scheme, it just strikes me as something petty she subconsciously does because she must have pictures where she feels she looks the best. There's absolutely repugnant candids of me out there, but even those bother me less than these because of the fact that someone wanted to capture a moment and didn't have ulterior intentions. Obviously people try to take pics with their own phones when they can, but she always gets a few slips in.
No. 499967
>>499966God, right? I couldn't believe people are actually trying to turn Qinni into a cow. Fucking leave her alone.
>"hideous art" thread in /m/ might just as well be renamed "post your vendetta here"100%.
No. 499969
>>499942That’s insane, teens are retarded and shouldn’t be hounded on every stupid thing they say. I don’t even think average joe adults should be either. Unless you’re a celebrity/role model who tf cares? People will always be racist or sexist or retarded, we should just ignore it and let them figure out on their own that they should change.
Source: I am a former edge lord retarded teenager who posted gross, cringe edgy shit, if someone dug it up to”expose” me it would look bad to see me as a 14 year old post “the Jews r evil” and other stupid stuff I didn’t actually think, I just parroted things I saw on 4chan
No. 499974
File: 1577875310908.png (673.15 KB, 803x457, 786BABAE-E372-43BC-AFEF-D7570D…)
Okay so I have two different topics to vent about.
1) Paycheck comes in this Thursday, but man it’d be nice to be pretty wealthy. It seems like no matter where my family and I go we are still struggling. To be honest, if I didn’t have a boyfriend I would consider sucking dick for money. At least then I’d be able to provide more groceries and such. And something is wrong with our only vehicle. I’m not sure what’s wrong with it, but it needs work done. Thankfully it’s still running. My parents also own some loans. If only I could sell my organs, lol.
2) My gay friend. I’ve been friends with him since the 8th grade and I’m not sure how he feels about me. I constantly feel like he hates me. I guess it’s just my insecurity speaking. I just wish I knew how he truly felt about me because there was a period where we stopped talking because I isolated myself and I never felt the same when we reunited a year later. He was happy to see me and stuff, but me being socially inept I felt like I was meeting him for the first time. We used to be so close, but then I isolated myself and he moved away (he visits our town sometimes) and I wonder if he still sees me as his best friend since we barely speak to each other. Probably not. I don’t know. I’ll figure it out.
No. 499976
>>499942Incoming sperg:
Social media causes people to dehumanize everyone else sharing the platform. People become just words on their screen and ruining their lives is like a game they're playing. Getting notifications is a quick dopamine rush and the easiest way to stir some shit to get recognition is a callout. People love to be outraged and you sacrifice someone to the wolves, simply in order get your own 15 minutes of fame. A handful of new followers and 20k RTs is worth thoroughly fucking someone over for life. But like I said, they're not a person, they're just words on your screen. You're not there to see the consequences, you're not there to witness them being traumatized, you're not there when their opinions become radical and destructive due to bad experiences. I know "Hate creates hate" is a busted old saying but I'm always reminded of that one article written by a mother whose 13-year old kid became the
victim of callout culture for something relatively innocuous that could've been taken care of in private and was blown out of proportions, so he gradually turned into an alt-right extremist due to the trauma he was left with.
When people defend the callout culture they forget that one day they might become the
victims of it themselves, in case they already don't realize that and are just hastily trying to pull some smoke and mirrors to hide their own trail. Imagine someone digging up that embarrassing, edgy post you made as a 15-year old and you're made to apologize and grovel for forgiveness at 25 because of it. And no matter how much you beg, it won't be enough. You'll become a non-person, your friends will drop you, you'll forever be judged for that one mistake you made years ago and someone decided to dig up and you had forgotten eons ago.
The most depressing part is that it's all a big performance for the people inciting it. They don't really give a shit about social justice, they're not doing it to make the world a better place. They just want to feel powerful and in control. It isn't even a kangaroo court, it's straight out punishing someone without a process. And that's a very dangerous direction to take. If they actually cared about their battles beyond the superficial social media clout, they'd pick one of the
multiple actual, legitimate nazis or confessed pedophiles online instead of harassing some 15-year old kids.
No. 499987
>>498092I don't think she'd be going in if she didn't need the money. I worked the the amazon warehouse for christmas and had what turned out to be pneumonia. If you were off or late for 3 days, you were fired, no matter what the reason. I took one day off when I didn't have the energy to move, and I remember my parents yelling at me to not go into work after, so I told them either they could pay me what I'll lose for being fired or I'm going in.
Blame Amazon tbh.
No. 500002
>>499969Same with me. I used to be a fucking edgelord up until I turned 20. I lived on the internet and at school repeating offensive shit I saw on ebaums world, 4chan, and YTMND. Tumblr funnymen used to throw around the n word so casually in late 2000s-early 2010s, now they're advocates for Chapo Traphouse.
The tweet thread I mentioned currently has 77k likes and 19k retweets. Like nothing actually racist was said, just some black girl saying "I give my white friend here the n-word pass! She's not hurting me when she says it!" And her friend just saying "Yeah, she says it's okay!"
No. 500004
>>499993I had her for under 2 years, I have tons of pictures of her but I also had a very distinctive tank setup and lots of pics of her on my personal insta so I am a little too nervous to post on lc in case I get recognized by anyone.
I have so many favorite memories with her, like how when I would dip my fingers in the tank she would kiss all over my hand and stay close to me. Or how when I got out her favorite frozen worms she would wiggle around like she was dancing with excitement. And how when I would walk in the door after work and called her name no matter what she was doing she would rush to the top of the tank and zigzag around while I came up and talked to her. She loved the color blue, too, lots of her plants and toys were blue cause of it and once I had some blue flowers next to her tank and she would stick to that side of the tank to watch them. I got her a big blue plant as a present this summer and I remember how excited she was when I put it in the tank.
No. 500025
I'm getting a little better at weeding out shitty dating prospects. Basically I'm conventionally unattractive, but a lot of guys think that's a green flag for I'll take their shit, accept their low effort behavior, and be grateful for the breadcrumbs. So far I've pissed a couple of them off for calling them out on their shit early. It always hurts my feelings initially because a little voice inside my head wants to believe eventually I'll be lovable to somebody. Like maybe these guys will care if I give them enough chances, but I know it's not good enough for me. Familiarity won't breed better behavior, and likely if they're starting out this way with me–when the initial months are all about impressing each other–then it doesn't bode. I hope, but I'm wiser.
Technically this last dude I saw "had" me because I did fuck him, but the upside is I was only on the hook for one month as opposed to wasting multiple months to years of my life chasing this feck. My crime? I asked him to attempt to communicate with me more, and when that expectation tripped him into spiraling at me with excuses, I asked him straightforwardly if I should just move on. I don't like being gaslit by lying men as if I'm clingy because I expect to be treated with consideration and decency. It ended with him hanging up on me because 'he didn't need this.' The scumbag didn't even contact me nor cared about me over the holiday, which told me everything I needed to know about him.
I didn't catch feelings. What gets me down is the principle that there's people out there that are so gutless and heartless that they'd do something like this to somebody. It's really sad, I'm trying my best to prevent being victimized by these people but they truly are insidious liars and manipulators. They weasel their way in.
I've got two dates lined up for the weekend, so at least I can take my mind off this jackass.
No. 500028
>>500025fuck yeah, fuck losers like that. absolutely pathetic, men can be utterly spineless at times. well done for standing up for what you want, it's not like you were asking for anything unreasonable.
I hope your dates go well! tbh it doesn't sound like you're that unattractive as you've literally got men lining up to date you
>>500027happy new year!
No. 500089
>>500007She would hide in the plant sometimes, but I had a little fake rock cube for her to use as a hiding place when she wanted privacy and she liked to go in there to nap sometimes too.
>>500018>>500030>>500031>>500048Thank you all so much, it means a lot to me that you all understand what our bond was like and believe in it, and your condolences are so kind. I just know nobody at work tomorrow or any of my family members if I called them would get it cause they don't see fish the way I do. To the anon who hopes I can keep more fish in the future, that's very sweet and a nice idea but I can't even fathom it right now cause I know I will be in pain for some time. But maybe one day I will have a pet again once I can come to terms with my feelings. Thanks so much again to all of you for your support.
No. 500102
>>499952>>499957>>499961Thanks guys.
Update: I told her that we shouldnt talk for a while because she keeps acting shady and rude to me for the past few weeks and then we argued after she said "i see why your family dislikes you" after i told her about the drama in my household where violence happened, then I told her to kill herself and said basically she shouldn't say that shit if her mom beats the shit out of her too.
I feel bad for telling her to kill herself like a
toxic shit hence why I deleted it and apologized immediately, but I find it so intensely fucked up how she always throws my deepest insecurities I confide to her in my face when we disagree about stuff esepcially when she's in her "PTSD" moods. Meanwhile I dont know her real name, her face (she has been sending me photoshopped images all along because she's paranoid). She also refuses to take my mental health or problems in my household seriously yet always goes on about hers (her PTSD) and her family problems..
She ended up blocking me and honestly I could not feel any better. I have been so tolerant and patient with her for months, and even limiting what I discuss or do with her (like she has ptsd
triggered by images, but she can send me screenshot/images), so to be treated like this and have my insecurities taken down was disgusting.
I just hope she holds her tongue and never speaks to me again.
No. 500107
File: 1577921573003.png (856.96 KB, 885x850, 1577915434777.png)
So, sometimes I browse comic book image boards, and and I saw this chick being literally fawned over even though shes dating a guy who fucking raped his baby cousin. He consistently draws herass some busty thick anime girl and I dont get the appeal at all. Like I'm sorry how can you wanna fuck someone who is directly supporting a pedophile?
Ps The image is from her insta and the channel they go by is Clair and James. It's aaanimation channel if you can even call it that.
No. 500109
File: 1577921759368.jpg (23.06 KB, 714x493, IMG_20191226_001110_564.jpg)
Why the fuck must scrotes be disgusting pigs. Jesus fucking christ I swear I am going to fucking beat the shit out of this horrendous subhuman, one day.
I share my flat with three more people and no fucking one is not disgusted with this dirty asshole. We can't kick out this fucker and he won't do shit even after we tried gently to ask him to fucking clean after himself, got into fights because this fucking asshair can't even wipe his ass.
I was about to share a photo of how he left the goddamned shower but I'm too ashamed of sharing my house with such a shitbag.
He's a fucking parasite, eating our food, destroying the stuff in the house and annoying people by costantly lamenting how miserable he is.
At least he fucking stopped talking about 15 yos while being 20 years older with absolutely no life, no job and still sharing a house with college students.
I want to fucking move from here, but real estate in my zone is hell and I can't afford a new room, let alone a new home. I'm killing myself or him, sooner or later. Keep your news tuned, sisters.
No. 500126
>>499988nah anon similar shit happens to me too. Let it be if I initiate the planning or my friends do.
I always have to be the one to reach out to them a day or two before to reconfirm shit just in case.
Tbh when they initiate the planning its a pain too because they go mia.
My friends never tell me when they leave the house to meet up or if they might be late, I always have to ask if they are coming half an hour before the planned time. People dont know how to communicate. Turned this into my own vent but Im extra salty because I waited for my fried for an hour because we agreed to met up at 2pm but she ended up arriving at 3 because she overslept, she lives 10 minutes away by bus and I live 25 minutes away by car, ffs ahh
No. 500134
File: 1577929723018.jpg (114.09 KB, 1080x1622, ENLHOhuXkAA6oOM.jpg large.jpg)
Was watching new years eve on TV and BTS was there
Never really cared about them, my aunt called them "little Japanese boys"
This guy made me decide to become gay though
No. 500219
>>500178fuck your friend, she's a shit one for trying to drag you down with her.
send her some anti mlm shit, it's always a sure way to get yourself blocked with relatively no stress on your end and hopefully they take some of it in lmao
vids related (not trying to shill, I personally drop these when someone wont give up on pushing their shit)
good luck keep us updated!
No. 500232
File: 1577951183445.jpg (150.31 KB, 799x602, 122212122.jpg)
How do I deal with getting older and feeling like I've already 'missed out'?
I'm in my mid-20s and I can just imagine how fast the next few years will fly past. I'm terrified I still won't have my shit totally together & still be a single virgin without any real friends. I'm already worried I'm too 'old' for a lot of my current hobbies. Plus there are so many other hobbies I should have started when I was younger. On my birthday last year I listened to Mitski's "Class of 2013" and cried at "Am I still young? Can I dream a for a few months more?".
I used to never even imagine living to my 30s. But now that my mental health has recovered and I'm somewhat 'normal' I just feel so, so far behind what everyone else in my life has already achieved and that time is running out for me. I'm also still worried I'm just too fucking stupid and uselesss to actually be successful in anything I want to do or learn.
No. 500234
I am a big advocate for "adopt don't shop" and my pets are all rescues, but some shelters make it borderline impossible to adopt and it's ridiculous. Reading some horror stories online recently reminded me of when my best friend, who had never owned a pet before, went through the vetting process to adopt a dog at one of the local shelters and she might as well have been adopting an actual child. She and her dad bought her house together, but when she filled out the form she didn't put his name because he doesn't live there and she didn't think it was relevant. I guess they looked it up and saw her dad's name, because they called her and chewed her the fuck out. She told me that they called her a liar and demanded his number, which she gave, and apparently they were psycho to her dad too. She's had to have two home interviews, one where they inspected every inch of her house and yard and then gave her a list of "fixes" she had to perform before she could be approved. They required a criminal background and credit check and both professional and character references. On top of that, she was required to pay to go to their seminars for new dog owners. On top of THAT, the adoption fee was 400 dollars. After a month of this bullshit, she told them she was no longer interested (again got chewed out for 'wasting their time' and they had 'a long waiting list for that dog') and bought a purebred lab puppy from a farm for the same price and none of the hassle. The dog she originally wanted is still languishing at the shelter months later.
It just sucks because these kinds of processes hinder the ability to rescue animals so much. I understand they want the pets to go to a good forever home but when you can just find a breeder in the newspaper, rock up with cash and leave with a cute purebred puppy in hand, why would anyone choose to jump through the hoops for a mutt? Adopting should be incentivized, not made harder than passing an interview for the NSA. More expensive adoption fees are understandable, but the rest of that shit is unnecessary and excessive.
No. 500244
>>500235i was in that thread (dumbass shit) and it
was mentioned, retard. that's probably where you found it out from. when boy dolls start pushing unrealistic expectations onto young boys about their bodies we can talk about that more, but of course the conversation was about the girl dolls more.
No. 500245
File: 1577955939193.jpg (60.22 KB, 875x492, AC.jpg)
I have a lot of trouble watching horror movies these days even though I used to enjoy them a lot as a teen. Just reading the synopsis for Midsommer made me panic to a crazy ass degree. I can still watch the classic slashers and stuff, so I'm not sure why these movies have such an effect on me all of a sudden. Freaks me out, man.
No. 500246
>>500239Gluten-allergic anon here, it's not that bad. I only get weird looks at taco stands. Just stand your ground and take yourself seriously, social pressure isn't worth feeling that awful over. The jokes people make are the hardest part. I try not to mention being gluten-free unless absolutely necessary.
You get used to it. Just order the eggs and bacon and potatoes, & make a hamburger bun out of french fries and lettuce. Bring your own slices of bread if you gotta. If you tell them you have an allergy, sometimes they'll let you request a la carte items off the menu. I survived an italian dinner that way. Pizza shops make me terribly itchy though. Also, find a good health food store, there's lots of alternatives out there nowadays.
Sorry if that was a lot, I just wish the best for your health anon
No. 500250
>>500096But that's the thing, back then, you could be retarded on main and no one would say shit. These past 5 years or so, both adults and other kids will hound on kids for doing shit that's not new only because it's trendy now. It probably doesn't matter to you now because you haven't been a
victim of it yet.
A but OT, but related, I've had my employer emailed and the police show up to my house simply basically because I stopped being friends with someone. They got my info from another person who I had sent mail to and made up a whole story that I posted private information of them online when all I did was talk to someone else, months after I stopped being their friend, about how they weren't that great of a person they make themselves out to be. Another person in this friend circle made a "call-out" post about me saying I was a fascist, literally unrelated shit.
I had to have an interview with a cop who came over to my house and basically explain this stupid shit was them overreacting because I was just discussing my past friendship. I'm honestly surprised they didn't dig up things I said in 2010 and before that when I was an edgelord. I ain't a celebrity or anybody popular in the slightest. It was a really odd and frustrating situation and it really changed the way I presented myself online afterwards.
I used to be like those people who would make call out posts. I would find rando racists on Facebook in the comment section of SJW videos and find their home addresses and employers and post them in the comments. Screenshot "gotchas" and make posts in Facebook groups outing them as terrible people. I don't do that shit anymore simply because I was on the other side, even though I didn't actually do anything morally bad, it's still the same treatment. I can't imagine how many other people have been
victim for mundane shit, especially young adults and teens.
No. 500255
>>500232Same, I feel like I missed out on so much. This summer it's going to be 6 fucking years since I graduated high school and I basically did nothing all these years. I'm going to be 25 which sounds so horribly old and I'm absolutely not ready for that, I'm an immature loser.
I'm now entering the stage in which people should get married, yet I have zero experience and I also didn't fulfil any of my dreams when it comes to what I wanted to learn or do as a young person. Stuff like making friends, dating, going out lots, finding a personal style, learning guitar, studying languages, becoming fit, traveling the world… All those are things that people start doing when they're 18 and get tired off a couple years later, because they have a partner and a career, but I didn't even start yet. I feel like I'm so lacking, I haven't even kissed anybody yet, who will accept somebody like that at my age, or when I'm even older? Plus, most men my age aren't single anymore anyway.
I know that sounds weird, but I also absolutely can't deal with the fact that people no longer treat me like a child. And the thought of turning 30 and therefore no longer even being a "young adult" in less than 6 years makes me sick.
No. 500264
>>500261This, I used to be so melodramatic about aging up too and honestly I'm still a bit wary of turning 30 soon so I can understand where these younger posters are coming from but also I've made so many friends with older women at this point who are badass individuals that I would never think of calling 'old'.
The idea of hitting certain life milestones by 30 is outdated, independently minded women from other time periods would have killed to live in a time such as now where we can have so much control over our own lives. I hope oneday freezing eggs for ivf becomes cheaper and more commonplace so that we're free of that last concern too.
No. 500274
>>500261>>500264I mean, even if you leave the aspect of media only supporting very young women aside, my grandma got married and gave birth at 22, my mom started dating my dad at 16, got married and had me when she was 26, I'm 24 and have zero experience. Every day I hear about young teen girls already having boyfriends or people my age getting married, many people graduate at younger ages than me, are buying or building houses, how could I
not feel like a loser?! Everybody is super attractive and has everything figured out at a crazy young age, while I'm a mess. Plus all those normal/successful people don't have as weird interests as I do.
Everybody tells me they cried when they turned 30 (and that they were already mothers), our neighbours are childless and imo seem to be living a very nice life, different from my parents, but everybody else just says that they definitely wanted children but aren't able to get pregnant, that it's not their choice. All people who aren't married and don't have children are only pitied (my parents' friends are probably already talking shit about me too), so I really don't have anybody to look up to, especially not an older woman.
I'm scared that if I don't get my shit toegther, I will end up like one of the many pitiful old and lonely customers at my retail job.
No. 500290
>>500281I feel the same way anon.
I’m 25 and I haven’t had a real relationship. I’m sick of tinder, I’m tired of just dating and wanting sex to just feel better.
I feel disconnected to my family. Everyone’s miserable since someone died two years ago but even then it was still shit.
I’m sick of my weight, I’ve put it on due to university. I’ve graduated and I can’t find a job. Two years since graduation and I’m working part time but my family want me in full time and a new job. I can’t find fuck shit in this city and the only things available is call center or recruitment or retail.
I hate my city it’s just grim and gross and the crime rate is increasing like mad.
I feel alone and I’ve felt it for years. When I was 14 I tried to overdose and even now I still feel tempted but I don’t.
So much bad shit had happened.
I’ve got no savings due to spending like mad when I lost someone and gained weight. I was just miserable. I had 11 K saved up and blew it on shit. 11 fucking K guys. I was 22 and I had that in the bank. Now I’m lucky if I’ve got 200 at least.
I don’t know I’m just sad and miserable. I’m trying to save, I want to get a new job and loose weight. I want to travel more places. I want to just be happy.
I wanted to be an actor when I was 12 and my family always said to me take up drama school. So it’s something I’ve got in mind and to do it in the evening after work.
And just get back into the gym and just balance shit.
I’ve also started applying for tv extra roles and running a small shop online just to gain cash back from what I’ve lost.
It’s a start I guess. It can’t get any more worse than what has happened.
But with my
toxic ass family and just inner sadness I feel like it’ll be impossible
No. 500303
>>500282What are you talking about? You sound insecure.
Anyway, not having a lot of partners doesn't mean you're have less or more baggage. If anything being single for a long time is a sign of being unhinged and having even more baggage. Most men I know don't like to date virgins for this very reason. Plus attractive women just tend to have more partners
No. 500441
>>500329And how exactly does that correlate with not dating or dating a lot? You can be disrespectful towards yourself by being in a LTR with a loser and not have a long dating history. You could have just dated a lot of people who are not losers. Nothing to do with how much or little you have dated
Are you also implying women who were in
abusive relationships aren't allowed to be happy in future relationships?
No. 500448
>>500446I bet you'll piss her off by saying this, despite that these le chronically abused women are in fact not realizing that the kids they may bring along with are the only
victims just because they needed a scrote so badly.
t. watched too many trailer trash documentaries
No. 500451
>>500446So why doesn't she deserve to be happy once she gets help? Why can't abused women date men who aren't
abusive?
>>500448How about we focus on scrots who are actually doing the abusing instead of villianizing abused women?
No. 500452
>>500451Sounds like my mom, she would complain about how
abusive men were to her but still invite a new one after another. If you can't take a break from dating and work on your issues than I can't feel all that bad.
No. 500455
File: 1577994945164.png (315.14 KB, 700x990, 08fe01b5-45f2-490f-b4dd-927657…)
when will my flatmates family finally fuck off!! I just want to make food freely in the kitchen I pay rent for and not be awoken by loud talking in the hallway for once! this holiday season has been absolutely shit. am prolly flopping uni, terrified of exams and dissertation, developed a hemorrhoid, have 1 (one) friend in this town, can't even chat shit with mom cause she got in a new relationship and has no time for a semi-weekly phone call etc. honestly, going to work was a highlight, at least had people to chat shit with there, plus some replenishment to my non-existent savings. uni starts on monday and frankly am ready to kms, I hate my life. if only I was less retarded and made some friends in my courses! then at least I wouldn't need to room with some rando who turned out less than considerate and my living situation would stress me out less but alas am stuck here until August.
No. 500458
File: 1577995860116.jpg (32.53 KB, 554x477, m7e6Z6r.jpg)
>>498054it seems like my ex whom i am still friends with was emotionally manipulating me all along, lately only texting him makes me shiver of anxiety and when i opened up about it reaching out for help he began gaslighting me, and i only realized that he has been gaslighting me literally every time we argued since we first met each other and i didn't notice it for years it drove me nuts, gave me lots of breakdowns and costed me lots pain, tears, and time. it explains a lot of stuff that i've been feeling, he never cheated but he had lots of problems including porn addiction, he was neglectful towards me and he almost never brought me a proper present (even for my birthdays) i used to always brush it off as him being stupid but god damn, he is bigger of an asshole than i originally thought.
No. 500468
File: 1577998030595.jpeg (113.35 KB, 1920x1080, D07D502D-043C-493C-9361-3DCFCC…)
Holidays/time off is always horrible for me unless I work full time. I’ve been waking up at 11 and 12 rather than 6-8:30 and I lull around all day until I have an event or obligation to go to. It really sucks. I haven’t had any motivation to work on my portfolio or go outside. I feel like every day this break has just been waiting around until I have to go somewhere. I’ve gotten some vidya time in thankfully and kept up with my gym routine but eating sleeping and just feeling alive generally has gone out the window.
No. 500481
File: 1577998717805.jpg (36.63 KB, 466x500, 718kgLcXydL._SX466_.jpg)
I'm like 80% sure my freeloading flatmate stole the metal lunchbox that I keep my weed in (pic related) along with 2 grams of weed. He's been staying with me and 5 other girls for a few months after he got kicked out by his mum, said he'd get a job and apply for benefits in the meantime but hasnt done either and we're pretty sure he's lying. He's been stealing bits of food from us and we thought he had no money so my friends actually bought him like 2 weeks worth of food without recieving any kind of thank you. We just thought he was kinda prideful and embarassed about his situation but this is just taking the piss.
Everyone but him is at university, so the day I was going to leave to go home for winter break the tin went missing. I only ever keep it in one place and I'd used it the night before, and it just disappeared. I spent two fucking hours looking for it, tearing my room apart until I physically had to leave to catch my bus. There is literally no place left in my room that I hadn't checked, as well as the rest of the house. I asked in our house group chat is anyone saw it and nobody replied. At a new year party some of our mutual friends who are closer to him and speak to him every day warned me about his compulsive lying, his drug abuse, and questionable financial decisions in the past. They divulged that he has spoken about smoking weed since he's been there (he doesnt know anyone in this new city so I doubt he has a dealer contact to get it himself) and that hes been ordering takeaways and food when we were lead to believe he had no money. I'm like 80% sure he took it, but part of me still doesnt want to believe that he could sneak into my room while im naked and asleep just for a little bit of weed - but the facts are he's the only other person in the house that smokes, he knows thats where I keep it, he knew I was leaving that day, and the thing didn't grow legs and disappear all by itself.
This is such a longwinded post but I've been thinking in circles just stressing about how im gonna have to confront him about this. I sent a very strongly worded message implying that I had no doubts it was him (thinking that would make him confess easier) but he hasnt even been online to look at it and I know im gonna have to confront him in person tomorrow morning when I get home. I just dont know what to do and the idea that he might just deny it and still be in my house just freaks me out.
No. 500506
>>500290God same! I don't feel a real connection to my relatives anymore since the passing, everyone was awful and it left a terrible hole in my heart, the only reason I haven't fucked off somewhere where I could do a heavy reset to my life is out of guilt for my mother despite her constant emotional abuse.
I'm 28 and I haven't done anything with my life, the career path I wanted to go down and go to college for my mother shot down and said it was too expensive and not worth it despite pushing me to go to college for years prior. I gained so much weight due to stress and I don't feel like myself anymore. It feels like I'm a sad disappointing shell of who I used to be and it's crushing. I don't know what to do anymore and all the things my relatives hammer in that I need to do with my life just makes me crumble now, it's embarrassing and I can't handle it anymore.
I'm so sorry you're suffering alone, I truly hope this year ahead will bring some good into your life or that you can escape the daily grind of bullshit to get some help and happiness. You're already taking a new step by applying for those roles, I'll be rooting for you that it brings you a good change ahead!
No. 500518
>>499990what were some of those quirks she had?
i dont think ive ever looked at fish for long enough to notice differences in behaviour
im genuinely curious and feel for you, my condolences
No. 500528
>>500519My cat is super picky like this. I decided to start giving him higher quality food because he deserved it and needed some chunking up, out of nowhere he just didn't like anything that wasn't chunks in gravy. He used to eat pate like no tomorrow, then after a while even the gravy in chunks was too much for him and he'd just leave it sitting out getting nasty!
I switched him back to dry food and found him something that was marketed as a gravy flavor mix and it was nice for a good 2 months… Now he doesn't wanna eat it anymore! Thankfully I had only a 1/4th bag of food left and mixed it in with another flavor of dry food, fingers crossed he'll like the gravy kind again, because I have two other cats that liked it.
No. 500547
>>500528kek our cats are like this too. well, one is bit better because he has been homeless for the majority of his life so
most things pate are fine by him, however, the other one is literally a fussy victorian child and guessing what food he wants today is like playing a
very rigged wheel of fortune. last two weeks he has liked those sheba soup things (he generally prefers wet food with lots of jelly and this is just that, basically) but I fully expect him to boycott them anytime between tomorrow and next week kek. love them both dearly, and spoiling them rotten is my only goal in life, just wish there was a way for me to actually know what they want!
cat to human translator when
No. 500593
File: 1578026114221.jpg (46.39 KB, 597x404, Pred 1.jpg)
I had to take Prednisone for a couple of months and it ruined my appearance.
I gained a lot of weight, specifically my face giving me a "moon face". I had a chubby face already and it made it significantly worse. It's been almost a year now and I lost all that weight but I feel as if my face is now permanently fat, like the steroids redistributed my facial fat in a permanent matter that will always make me look chubby. I can't help but feel extremely depressed about it.. like I aged 10 years.
I don't know if I'm being dysmorphic or something because I'd imagine that ~50mg prednisone for a couple of months cant do that sort of damage but it's now permanently ingrained in my head. Sometimes I can barely leave the house now for weeks at a time.
No. 500602
File: 1578029504353.jpg (557.73 KB, 749x866, cat soup kitchen.749x866.jpg)
>>500564The thought of a cat eating soup makes me smile.
No. 500618
File: 1578034871662.png (185.9 KB, 500x380, No!.png)
>>500601Same, anon. Everybody joking about it on twitter makes it even more bleak.
No more war, goddammit.
No. 500628
>>500601Wait the US attacked Iran and this is the "World ward 3" everyone is talking about?
Jesus christ I hate melodramatic americentrism so much.
No. 500637
File: 1578039545446.jpeg (68.59 KB, 1242x717, ENUquFfU4AApz5a.jpeg)
>>500628How exactly is that melodrama anon? This is a huge world event, and could actually be the start of WW3. Don't be so fucking dense.
No. 500647
File: 1578042661866.jpeg (149.3 KB, 640x640, 37AC313E-2A78-463C-9F45-5D926C…)
>>500622Life as we know it is already over
No. 500663
File: 1578045495992.jpeg (86.68 KB, 1125x970, 6FA301D4-94BB-4D19-84FF-8FD4D9…)
I decided today would be the day I use mic. Started getting an anxiety attack before I even opened the game. Fml.
No. 500714
>>500528My dog has always had a sort of sensitive stomach so we've switched up her food throughout the years as she's gotten older and it's gradually gotten more and more expensive as we keep switching to higher quality brands. We're at like… the top of the line fresh dog food now, I don't even know what to switch to after this lol. She's such a princess, I know she'll be offended if I dare switch back to anything else. She excitedly follows me every time I have her food bowl, but if it happens to be something she doesn't like, she looks at the bowl after I set it down and then her tail drops and she looks at me with the most disappointed look, I hate it haha. I know she won't die after not eating for a day or two but fuck.
>>500575I was considering mixing in some boiled ground beef… hopefully it won't be easy to pick out because she's definitely successfully picked out bits of food/treats before when we've tried it haha. She ends up leaving a huge mess around the bowl because she'll pick up all the food she doesn't want and then sets it outside the bowl. She's only smart in the worst situations and then plays the act of the world's dumbest dog the rest of the time lol. Absolutely love her, but why is she like this…
No. 500748
>>500742This is a cute post, anon. I hope you can overcome your social anxiety and get some good friends! From someone who has, just know that it
is possible and attainable.
Have fun painting.
No. 500767
>>500628They didn't even attack Iran, they attacked Iraq LOL. I am lolling because the USA is being a cunt again.
t. ameriboo
No. 500771
File: 1578075675041.gif (97.38 KB, 480x360, EfcLDDAkyqgtn5aR4fuHJyEizhW27w…)
Yay 2020
I just lost my job (I was in training I'm a complete newbie but fuck that's not a damn excuse to lose a $600 job) now I feel like a worthless shitstain
No. 500856
>>500845People will die because of this.
It's easy for you to say you're not scared if you're not particularly high at risk a la being a nobody living in some flyover state in whogivesafucksville.
Again, people will die. There will be retaliatory attacks, consequences, and repercussions.
No. 500863
>>500856I'm not scared for my own safety because I know it's nothing compared to the fear and safety of the people over there. We're sitting here in our cushy office while they've been living in a region riddled with political turmoil for years. My coworker and I will not directly feel the consequences of Soleimani's assassination, but the people over there (Americans or not) will.
I'm venting because my coworker doesn't seem to understand that people do in fact exist outside the bubble that is the U.S.
No. 500878
>>500656delulu post, anon. pointless, difficult errands that result in the casualties of both american soldiers and contractors, and me civilians are scrumptious morsels for warhawks. anything to siphon tax dollars into the hands of war profiteers, and distract and rile the american populace into voting for those warhawks.
>>500874i think this is highly unlikely. what is super likely, however, is a sharp increase in terrorist attacks, not linked to their respective governments, on innocent americans as a result of this manufactured and pointless bullshit.
No. 500906
This sounds like some soap opera bullshit, but I swear it's not. In November, my dad caught his new wife cheating on him at a friend's house in a whole other country, and it turns out she may or may not have been plotting to have him killed with the person she was cheating with. This is after a track record of insane cowlike behavior from this same woman. They have a 3 year old daughter together that she constantly leaves alone with a nanny, and she threatened to haul her off to Malaysia (she's Malay and French) and change their identities because of some argument she and my dad had that I can't even remember. I don't know what mental disorder she has, but it's a headache. I was getting all this information secondhand, so I didn't know what to believe, but then I personally witnessed one of the nannies she employed go completely apeshit at her, call her a stupid bitch and quit on the spot, and I knew.
I've mostly checked out of any emotional investment with my dad for personal reasons (he has a track record himself), but he promised to pay my college tuition, I have no other options, and it's making me extremely bitter that he's been throwing all his money on some woman who has physically attacked him multiple times (at one point while holding her baby), neglects her own child, and would even go as far as arranging to have him murdered to take his money. He even supported her family. They were poor before he gave her a chance, so you'd think she'd be more appreciative and just stick to secretly cheating and playing nice when she gets sick of him, or just dumping him once she's made links with some other rich old guy, but nope. She just had to try and scheme on his life, render her own child fatherless, fuck over his children (because to hell with me, right?), and try to take everything.
As of the new year, and with much deliberation, he's supposed to have dropped her after this, but he also dropped all the legal charges (even though the police have it on record), and the fact that he was so incredibly stupid that he got with such a person in the first place makes me doubt he's done with her for good.
I fucking hate my family. I hate that I was deliberately kept isolated so I'd have no marketable skills for a well-paying job. I hate that my only option of getting out of their grasp and becoming independent is so far from me because of my idiotic father's fuck-ups. I hate everything.
No. 500930
File: 1578100224096.png (627.24 KB, 527x578, bw.png)
I'm in mourning and this annoying asshole keeps messaging me. I don't want to tell him about my loss because it's none of his business and I'd feel dirty telling someone like him, knowing he will try to console me. I can't tell him to fuck off because he is someone I have to see regularly and I know I'll be painted as the bad guy because he's autistic. Not the low functioning type, but the greasy smelly socially retarded type. I can't mute my phone because family members are also contacting me constantly. I'm so tired of this shit. I never even gave the dumb cunt my number, he got it from someone else. How can someone be so persistent after being ignored so often?
No. 500948
>>500933>>500932I hadn't thought of it, I'm technologically illiterate and not in the right state of mind lmao. Thanks anons.
>>500934I complained about him to a mutual acquaintance and she told me.
No. 500949
Is political discussion allowed here now? Just double-checked the rules and didn't see anything about it. Don't ban me please, I'm not usually an /ot/ poster but I saw a post about terrorism on the main and thought I should contribute. Won't blogpost why.
>>500895>There's two large oceans between America and the rest of the world, which makes an invasion of US soil by a country hostile to them virtually non-existent.I agree with your larger point, but this is exactly what Lindbergh said about an air attack before Pearl Harbor.
Geography is slightly less relevant now anyway, because terror groups act via online propaganda more than ever before. So, for example, some mainstream outlets like the NYT count the Pulse nightclub shooting as a Daesh attack on US soil.
>>500863>I'm not scared for my own safety because I know it's nothing compared to the fear and safety of the people over there. That's extremely obvious, but not really a mark against your coworker. To see your truism and raise you one of my own, people can be concerned for their own lives while being less at risk than others. Hopefully you wouldn't say that about a DPRK attack if you live in Japan, HI, a even CA, just because we're better off than people living in the DPRK.
>>500878>what is super likely, however, is a sharp increase in terrorist attacks, not linked to their respective governmentsBasically exactly this.
>>500944That's probably correct. Additionally, now more people are likely to be radicalized.
No. 500950
>>500878terrorist attacks
are the war coming to our soil.
No. 500974
I'm going to a funeral tomorrow for a relative who my family was extremely close to who passed away exactly a month ago.
Right now I'm at an age where many of my friends haven't experienced death at all, still have all their grandparents etc., so I'm in the uncomfortable position of grieving around those who just like… don't get it, at all. My boyfriend, who's never even lost a pet, said after I reminded him the funeral was tomorrow 'I hope tomorrow goes well!!". it was a nice sentiment, but its so hard to know other people that have never been affected by death, and don't personally know just how much everything sucks, and will suck so bad, and there's nothing you can do about it cause you can't go into a funeral having a positive mindset about it.
now i just feel awful cause I know i've been a bummer for a month which is understandable to those who've been through it, but a lot of the people close to me don't have anything to compare it to, and have told me that they don't understand how it could affect my day to day life. I know eventually everyone will experience grief but its just crazy to me how some people can be in their twenties without ever attending a single funeral.
No. 501117
File: 1578137910246.jpg (32.1 KB, 472x649, rosie.jpg)
>>501101You're a woman, they won't draft you. At least not to to front lines. At least not until there's no other men left standing. Instead you'll be put to work building tanks or packing ammo - which is really not the bad unless someone close stuffs up and blows you up as well. There's a very good chance that your father, your brothers your partner, and sons will be killed, but at least you'll stay alive to remember them as heroes. Well unless we lose the war, that is. In that case I'd recommend suicide over gangrapes and starvation. Keep a grenade under your dress and take some of them out with you.
>>501115Oh shit dude, Daria, of course. I wasn't even thinking about cartoons. Yeah just watch that instead.
No. 501124
>>501119In Israel they briefly tried forcing the female conscripts into combat roles, and then abandoned the experiment when they found (most) women would first put lives at risk by freezing under extreme pressure, and then put even more at risk by
triggering the protective instincts of many male squad mates. There's still mandatory service for all Israeli citizens, but significant care is taken to place its citizens in the roles they're best suited for based on stated preference, psychological testing, physical aptitude, etc.
No. 501143
>>501140>and almost all because they care about female loved oneslolwhat? No, it's because it's their job.
>but on the whole I absolutely believe it's in male nature to tend towards sacrificing for the sake of women and children since the men that actually gave a shit would have been the ones whose genes had the best chance for survival.Anon, that is a ridiculously wrong understanding of evolutionary psychology. Also, even if I accept what you are saying, which I don't, that would only be the case for HIS woman and child, not random ones. So the point is still moot for the army.
No. 501147
>>501141Fuck yeah they do. Lyudmila Pavlichenko is my favourite Disney princess. Just I'm talking generalizations here. When push comes to shove they won't have time to assign to assess all people as individuals and will fall back on cruder heuristics like judging folk on gender. Ultimate badass women can still volunteer, and still prove themselves exceptional, but those that don't will not be held to the same standards as men.
>>501143>it's their jobThey're volunteers.
>Also, even if I accept what you are saying, which I don't, that would only be the case for HIS woman and child, not random ones.Random ones from the same tribe can count as kin by proxy. The tribes that produced men that sacrificed for the tribe would have outperformed tribes where each nuclear unit was only in it for themselves.
No. 501149
>>501147>They're volunteers.Ok, that's different. Still, nothing to suggest it's natural, men are socialised to take on these roles.
>Random ones from the same tribe can count as kin by proxy. The tribes that produced men that sacrificed for the tribe would have outperformed tribes where each nuclear unit was only in it for themselves.Anon, we KNOW men don't sacrifice their lives for strangers, there have been studies about shipwrecks for example. Men will absolutely get in lifeboats before women and not offer their seats, the Titanic was an exception. Basically, men are not stupid, dying for a stranger is stupid.
No. 501171
I’m tired. I’m so, so tired. I’m exhausted.
All my teens and nowadays it seems people only see me as someone who they can talk to but only to explain THEIR problems.
I have a shitty life. I don’t want to go into details but basically I’m all alone, always. There’s nobody out there for me. No family. Almost no friends. I have so much responsibilities and I’m only on my early 20s. I didn’t want any of this, I would trade my house, my car, even the money I earn for just one more day in the past, where I used to be suicidal and I didn’t know what it was coming.
And all this people. All my “friends”. Everyone who ever approaches me can’t see any of that, even when they know what happened to me. Even when they know exactly who I lost, how it was, no one can ever reach to me even on Christmas and ask me just how I’m fucking do it for once.
I heard them complaining about Christmas time being all sad and nostalgic, wanting to run away if they could and just because they don’t like it. Just because they can run away, travel the world, just because they can say how sad Christmas was but they have no idea about how I feel, how Christmas was just a little more painful but it doesn’t stop hurting never.
I used to think giving them my attention and “presents” meant something but they don’t give a shit anymore. Of course if someone else bring them something they would post it and be all proud and smug, but coming from me? Even if I put all my good intentions? Nah, not worth it.
Sometimes when I’m with people I feel like I want to scream and never stop. Like, I feel it inside my chest, I can feel all this anxiety creeping up on me and I know when I’ll get home I would cry my eyes out until I can’t breathe anymore. Of course what they see are my messages explaining how nice the time with them was and how I’m hoping to see them again soon.
And I know it’s my fault. I know it because I did it to myself, I acted this way just because I wanted to fit in, I wanted to be…Loved. But this is not the real me, the real me is someone bitter, someone who wants to die day after day. And I know I should search for help but I also know I don’t want to be alive. My world stopped on a very specific day and I won’t be happy anymore, ever. I can have some moments, maybe some days when I think it will be okay but deep inside I know that something irreplaceable was taken from me some years ago. And I don’t want to live with that hurt because I just can’t accept it, I tried for years and I can’t, I just…can’t.
I let people think this is the way I am instead of letting them actually see me and I want to run away every time someone tells me how good I am, that I’m the bravest person they know because it’s not real, that’s a lie and just pure character.
Some people even idealise me to the point I don’t want to meet them ever again because I despise myself when people see me like that. And every time I tried to explain it to someone, they told me it’s okay to feel bad and I should let the world see me hurting but it’s not like that at all, I don’t care about being sad, I want to die.
So many smaller things trigger me, it’s pointless. My “friends” ignoring me. Looking at me like I’m stupid when I talk. That superiority they think they have just because I don’t tell them anything of what I see.
I don’t ever feel like crying anymore, I’m so tired of everything I think it’s just absurd at this point.
No. 501194
>>501173Maybe if the gifts were emotional and personal she didn't want to post about them and have randos comment. With the small gifts, some people feel the urge to over-thank for cheap things for fear of appearing ungrateful like the cheap things weren't "good enough".
Hard to say much else not knowing the situation, just posting from the perspective of someone who shows more excitement over trinkets than the big important things I deeply value and show little emotion over.
No. 501196
>>501173Similar thing happened to me. I gave each of my friends custom made spa day kits based on what they like. It wasn't super expensive, but each bundle I put together was around $20, enough that for a few friends it did require me to budget and put in the effort at work.
They seemed to like the stuff, but I felt my gifts got swept under the rug too. If anything it was like they just felt guilted that I had gotten them something nice.
What they got me? Nothing, except one friend was so careless that she got me some dollar store lotion set that wasn't even mine. She had wrapped it up but forgot which friend's name she had written on the 'to' tags underneath the wrapping paper and I had gotten someone else's gift. Not that I think she bought them with any particular taste in mind like I had. I just left it at her house. Then there's always the token friendo that didn't get anyone anything but claims they ordered everyone's gifts "late" and the gifts mysteriously never come in the mail because they didn't actually get you anything and just hope you forget. Sigh.
Somewhat else related but I had to endure a friend's retelling of a recent vacation she took over the holiday. It pissed me off because she was acting so materialistic while describing all her luggages full of shit she bought herself. Meanwhile I went to the same destination scant broke and backpacked with no luggage. Yet still managed to bring her and other friends back a decent souvenir. It makes me mad that both friends I had bought for on my trip didn't get me anything when they went despite having the money and the room to do so.
They're honestly quite selfish.
No. 501199
>>501188Thank you for your answer. It’s hard because I feel like I invest too much in this friendship, of course much more than her.
>>501194Thanks for replying! I get what you mean but she’s not like that…she could have used one of the presents with me on a very specific day but she didn’t, also she posted something about using it with other people (who aren’t that close with her) and didn’t even mentioned anything about me.
She always takes me for granted because I don’t ever say anything but I’m getting annoyed because it’s not nice to be always someone’s third or fourth option…
No. 501200
>>501196I know exactly how you feel because it always happens to me too.
I know it may sound dumb but it feels nice to know people think about you sometimes. I think it deceives me because even when I try to remember it’s just small things and people shouldn’t act like I expect, it hurts investing time, money and “feelings” and just receiving a polite answer in return, almost as if it’s forced.
I’m sorry you had to feel like that, anon. <3
No. 501213
>>501199Eh well, guess all I can say is most people just aren't that great, and to remember their actions are reflecting poorly on themselves, not on you.
Whenever stuff like that happens to me or I watch allegedly close people talk behind each other's back, I always think of Generation Kill, idr if it was in the show or just the book but Alexander Skarsgard's character is talking about his best friend stealing his wife and going over to their house and seeing pictures of them doing all the things they used to do together. And he delivers 'It's nice having friends.' with a straight face. It just makes me laugh.
No. 501251
>>501224I feel you anon. I moved to a nice country at 18 all by myself and stuck it out until now (7 years), I went through a war as a kid, and it's impossible to explain to people that my country isn't the way it is because its citizens are stupid, we're not incompetent, we're not uneducated, and we're not evil just because some crazy is in charge of the government back home. People here have no idea how good they have it and I'll never stop being bitter about it. It's so easy for families to stay together here too, because it's peaceful and nobody quarrels about money, and the government pays for so many things.
It's a history of gerrymandering and foreign forces having their fingers in our proverbial pie, being forced into "democracy" that is actually just the US wanting to reinstate a puppet government that will dance to their tune, the bad system breeding corruption and violent behaviour, etc etc. Yet whenever I say how it is back home people just ask "so why can't you like… elect a
good leader now, what's stopping you?" or "why can't you just xyz", they make it sound like it's so easy and we're willingly up shit creek because we fancy being miserable. It's one step away from "lol just stop being poor".
No. 501270
File: 1578177520547.jpg (824.15 KB, 1024x768, 43d6a17e457a8e25b4.jpg)
>>501251At least you managed "escaping".My father's been working abroad for most of his life and he's always been paid less than people from developed countries, he always had to do more and most of those from developed cpuntries treated him like a less than human being and a Neanderthal just because they have a bias against my country for Being less developed. He's had trouble finding work and his current field became too much for him as he is getting older and developing more and more health issues, so he tried finding a stable job in the Netherlands and it was basically a big scam where he got put in a house full of rats and cockroaches with other immigrants from poor countries, he was promised decent working conditions. My father is also educated and has a college degree and is an electrical engineer. He's been getting more and more depressed lately because he's running out of money and things are stresful for him and recently he told me he's been contemplating suicide.
My mother suffered mental ilness since her youth and the system just made it worse she developed a hospital fobia because one time when she had a mental break down they tied her up at the mental hospital and then she got an injection that was supposed to make her fall asleep but she didn't fall asleep completely she was half aware and one of the male nurses raped her, I believed her because she would never lie about something like that and because she was an outstandingly smart person, I tried suing the hospital but I've just been told my mother does not have mental capacity and that she was delirious so basically she lied. My mom is unfortunately dead from suicide now.
My grandmother has had gastric issues since 5 years ago and I went with her at the GP and I even insisted she should investigate my grandmother and do some scans etc she just gave her some medication and looked at me like I was the devil, 5 years later my grandmother is dead from stomach cancer that was diagnosed in the last stage and moment she died 2 months after her diagnosis.
I've been in and out of hospitals since I was a child I've probably spent more than 3 years of my life in total in hospitals full of grime and bacteria where the toilets were broken and shit was smeared everywhere. The doctors never gave me a diagnosis and just called me hypochondriac, a liar, faking my illness. They always told my parents I was manipulative when I had panic attacks 6 times per day and I would call the ambulance because I genuinely felt like I was having a heart attack or stroke. They even made my parents persecute me for my illness and they made me believe I was hypochondriac when actually I just suffer from high functioning aspergers and I've always been suffering from this and it caused me a lot of issues and instead of being helped I got tormented
When a country is poor and underdeveloped and corrupt it fails it's people. Poor educational system, poor medical system, poor awareness system, only stupidity and ignorance.
Picture from the hospital I've spent at least 2 years in total.
No. 501271
File: 1578177802984.png (2.29 MB, 890x1200, mcsuicidal.png)
I'm 104 days sober. I don't know if it's worth it.
Drinking kept this angry monster I didn't even know I had inside of me at bay. Now I can't drink, I can't smoke, I can't cut myself, and I'm full of hate. Removing all these crutches may have been the biggest mistake of my life. I'm repulsed by who I am as a person. I've been directing this inner hate outward and being a bully. A bitch. Selfish. Rude. A hypocrite. Whatever it is that's making me so miserable is crawling under my skin and trying to break out. It's telling me to make fun of people and hurt them. Telling me I need to punish myself. It won't let me sleep. Nobody can help me to make it quiet.
I can't do this anymore. The people who love me are already tired of me. My guess is they are desensitized to my pain because I fucking complain so much. If I indulge in one of these vices my boyfriend will most likely break things off with me. He'll be able to tell if I smoked or drank and he'll see the scars. I am under so much stress for no good reason and I can't talk to him about it because I don't want to be annoying or seem crazy. Any time I try to talk to my mom she offers some generic advice and proceeds to vent about her own shit like she's done since I was way too young to be playing her therapist. I am a lot like my dad in the sense that he is completely inept at dealing with emotional shit so it's useless to try and talk to him. My best friend is dealing with her own shit and I don't want to bother her. I have nobody to lean on.
Should I just fucking buy a pack of smokes and some whiskey at this point? It's the only thing I can think of to help me calm down and appear normal for the people who love me but can't help me. It's lying, but I need to hide what I'm dealing with because they're all sick of my shit and aren't obligated to put up with me. Should I start going to AA? I don't think my alcoholism was severe enough and I'd just be taking up space.
If I still feel like this after a scalding hot shower and a long drive I don't know what I'm going to do. If anyone reading this wants to be armchair psychiatrist go ahead because I can't afford therapy and have no idea what's wrong with me but I think I might just be retarded.
No. 501275
>>501270I don't have the words. What can we do to help?
>>501272Don't worry about the dyslexia. It's your words that others will care about. So long as you get them out they can be edited to professional standards after. The world hasn't abandoned you. It just doesn't know you exist yet.
No. 501279
>>501273Romania. The living conditions aren't bad especially if you are a foreigner because a salary that makes you poor in America makes you rich over here. As long as you don't have to deal with the public sector you are fine everything that has to do with the public sector is fucked, hospitals, schools etc. It's also easier to evaluate the living conditions incorrectly as a tourist because once you have to live in the country you will see the living conditions for the average citizen are shit.
>>501275I'm not expecting people to do something for me, I'm just venting because that's what I do when I can't take it anymore. I like venting on lolcow because it makes me feel less alone at times like the anon that replied to my initial post. I'm not writing because I wanna become famous, or because I want people to know my pain. I'm writing because I've always wanted to write a book and I have so many thoughts about bad things in my life and memories so writing those in a book and taking them out of my system will help me. I've always thought I would start writing around 30 because I feel too stupid now but who am I trying to fool I've been the same person for years and years I'll probably not be more capable at that age. I started writing now because I feel like I may sudoku very soon.
No. 501299
>>501270shit like this is why I feel like validation culture is so dumb. it's like …uh yeah you look so dumb complaining about your first world problems. your issues are NOT as
valid as people in legitimately worse conditions. it just seems like a way to pat people on the back for being ignorant about the world. like, I don't think people should be shamed over it like boomers do but…be humble. I don't know.
No. 501362
>>500029Just don't use others' things without permission…
You're in the wrong here
No. 501368
>>501362I would agree with you but the roommates took anon gf's food without asking as well. On the other hand maybe the alcohol was more expensive than the egss. I would also not want to share stuff that cost me a lot of money with someone idgaf about.
>>500029The situation sounds
toxic, your gf should gtfo and live with you instead
No. 501372
File: 1578219087962.jpg (31.59 KB, 444x365, 1cr2z3.jpg)
I love my dog so much but I have been diagnosed as allergic. It's getting really bad. I might have to sell her.
I just can't deal with this, I'm heartbroken.
No. 501377
>>501357It depends on the cow. I've seen most people in the Venus thread say they liked her better with blond hair and that with dark hair she looks like a weeb. They said the same about Poppy, though I think Poppy actually suits brown hair better and it's her natural color.
When anons say they should dye it darker, 9/10 times it's because their hair is tatty and damaged and dark hair shows less damage, not because they only think brown hair is acceptable.
No. 501378
>>501372I'm sorry anon. I second going to a specialist. I also have a sibling with an allergy to animal dander. We had a cat for 16 years. I don't know if your living situation would allow for it, but he was able to deal with it with a combination of antihistamines and keeping her out of his bedroom completely. He did find it hard at first but both he and the cat got used to it eventually.
>>501377>When anons say they should dye it darker, 9/10 times it's because their hair is tatty and damaged and dark hair shows less damage, not because they only think brown hair is acceptable.Yeah, it's more about the condition. When kiki was still producing milk most anons agreed that she looked best with peroxide blonde hair.
No. 501418
>>501397I'm so sorry you went through that anon. I hope you can surround yourself with more sensitive and emotionally intelligent people.
Your very strong for rising above that kind of behavior.
No. 501421
File: 1578237093626.jpg (7.6 KB, 195x194, 45fc9ded-5368-468b-90e5-297cfd…)
>>501412back off from my stupid wife and her retarded filler choices!!
No. 501453
File: 1578243336178.gif (3 MB, 498x278, Sammy.gif)
I have to put my foot down when it comes to my (childhood) friend. We were fwb and it was great, but he's basically trying to cheat on his new gf with me. She already met his parents, they are pretty serious about the relationship and already want kids in a few years.
Sadly for him she doesn't have a high sex drive or just doesn't want to fuck him as often, as him and I used to which makes him frustrated, and in return it makes me pissed because he's obviously trying to use me. You don't get to fuck me or get nudes from me to jack off only to turn around to her, tell her how much you love her, buy her gifts, take her places and other shit. He doesn't get that he's hurting both her and me, which is telling.
I don't want to lose him as my only friend but I might have to if he doesn't stop. God he's an idiot.
pls no bully anons, I didn't send him anything and I know he's dumb etc
No. 501473
>>501457I have no way of contacting her unless I make an Instagram, I guess. Even then idk if she'd believe me or just get mad, shit talk or even share my nudes that he has from when we were fwb.
It just sucks that someone I've been friends with since childhood days sees nothing wrong with wanting to "pump and dump me" while being with someone else. He's also the type of friend who I can call at 3am if I had to hide a body, so it all just makes things worse.
No. 501487
>>501473something something men barely human.
in all seriousness though, i'm very sorry anon, kinda losing a friend like that must suck so much. i haven't had any very close male friends but whenever the casual male friends i do have prioritise their dick/male ego over our friendship it's just such a hollow feeling. i think you should try to contact the gf tho, esp if she thinks their relationship is that serious i reckon she'd want to know.
No. 501520
>>501372>>501373>>501447Can't you overcome animal allergies/other non-severe ones through exposure?
I used to be allergic to my cat but after 14 years of him (it probably ended before then but I wasn't keeping track since I was a child) I could stuff my face in his fur nbd. And my allergies to things in general have diminished as soon as I
stopped taking antihistamines like no tomorrow. Which I did at 21, so it's not even puberty affecting that part.
No. 501534
>>501520yes, and allergies are also pretty unpredictable so anon could potentially get anaphylaptic shock one day and die with no warning (although tbf this is unlikely).
like
>>501447 said what kind of crazy ass nutter takes pills for life just to own a pet lmao
No. 501539
>>501536i fucking hate people who do shit like
>>499704 tbh. taking care of someone when their sick shouldn't be on
your terms. everything else anon said about him being sick is gross too.
No. 501586
>>500234I wonder if they have all these checks to prevent people adopting animals and doing horrible things (torture, using them for fighting etc)
It seems really over the top. I feel bad for the dog she wanted to adopt.
No. 501606
File: 1578272500179.jpeg (10.49 KB, 666x417, 5d9213774209f.jpeg)
I'm a snake owner so naturally I joined a couple reptile pages on fb. There's this one snake page that's mostly for posting funny memes and cute snake pics and that's cool. But whenever the topic of husbandry comes up, the page legit makes me stressed. Not even nitpicky stuff, like someone full on wrapped their snake around their pet dog (who's eyes were huge and scared looking) because they thought it was cute. I feel like if you say anything slightly like "hey maybe that's not a good idea…" you get slapped with the hater label and you're just being mean, it's totally fine. Post an obese snake? It's so cute and beautiful, that snake isn't fat and shouldn't lose any weight at all!
I don't understand it. These are living creatures, not some accessory or toy. This page also encourages the adopting of tons of snakes to the point of hoarding, and getting a snake under your partner's nose if they don't agree with adopting one. It's not just snakes or reptiles either, that's just the pages I personally frequent.
No. 501610
>>501576Try cloves? You'll get them in literally any shop beside the flour and baking supplies.
Chew/suck some cloves, keeping them close to the pain with your tongue. There's a mild anaesthetic in the cloves, so it'll take the edge off your pain.
No. 501638
>>501633Step 1: get a Twitch & Twitter
Step 2: do some uwu
Step 3: demand that one of your new orbiters DMs you a prepaid visa (or their cc number)
Step 4: Profit and buy airplane food
No. 501685
>>501458Yeah my gf does the same. I avoid talking about any issues now cuz I know she'd reply once an hour at the very best, but nothing for days at the very worst. Very
toxic, but if I talked about it with her I'd get ignored for a week at least.
No. 501726
>sister breaks up w bf last summer
>ex bf won't leave her alone, shows up at our house, manipulates her, keeps calling her and demands to "hang out", otherwise he'll harass all her friends
>sis tries to follow said "rules" but wants to be left alone and get to live on
>tries being his friend, he can't handle it
>he tries to control her every move and will get violent if she look at another boy
>he has stalked her and bygone the blocks on social media
>she went to police to try to get some help, as all her friends have been driven away by ex bf
>"u didn't block him at first, so yeah, it's your own fault"
>the stalking and harassment get worse every day, she can't leave the house w/o him complaining or trying to get in touch w her, only contact over cash app
>mom very ambivalent abt it - won't really help
>i'm ready for a prison sentence if i get to slap that fucking little shit down
>finally gets mom convinced to go to police again … she doesn't seem to really care or want to do anything abt it
>sis really only has me in her corner …
No. 501738
File: 1578330725986.jpg (55.2 KB, 330x313, 20200106_121230.jpg)
This dude from one of my classes is now messaging me obsessively and I have no idea what to do. He was telling me how depressed he is and how he doesn't trust girls because this one girl didn't want to be his girlfriend? I was trying to be sympathetic but I feel like I only made it worse. Now I think that was his awkward attempt at flirting.
He told me "I should sew a dick to you so you'll have some meat to play with" like seriously what the fuck. Who types a vile message like that and thinks it's okay to send, to an aquantiance no less. I didn't reply to him for a few days after that but I still don't think he got the hint, judging how he was joking about me not replying to his disgusting messages in class today.
I'm really scared of saying anything to him because I'm worried he'll get physically violent, he's much bigger than me and his attitude towards women seems particularly shit so it's not out of the question.
No. 501744
Did
>>501633 die of starvation tho?
No. 501753
File: 1578334347759.gif (706.67 KB, 500x550, 637ec6c1816a6ad2e594616c7f7354…)
We don't talk and your boyfriend seems nice… I wanted to be the one to save you.
No. 501758
File: 1578334965851.jpg (35.27 KB, 500x500, f57abc86ecb42d01bd5b358e965b61…)
I was currently in training and now I lost my damn job for passing a few exams and now my piece of shit father has verbally abused me calling me worthless and calling me a mentally ill good for nothing
Now I have to go back to the ghetto shithole I call home back in Texas
Because according to him it was my last opportunity to get a job in a tiny third world country (he was born in) now I am hopeless and depressed
No. 501786
>>501738Don't ignore him but slowly distance yourself naturally. Reply little to his messages, or not at all and if he asks say you forgot. Don't choose to hang out with him. Eventually he will back off without getting violent.
This is the only way I have found to deal with guys like him in a way that doesn't backfire.
No. 501803
>>501800I would pee in her mug, fuck that lady.
I try my best not to buy from Amazon because I feel so fucking bad for the employees. It's no secret that their working conditions are ass, but I read one particular article recently that just really hit me in the gut. I can't help but imagine my poor older parents, having no place else to go and having to end up working for Amazon and being subjected to people like the lady at your job. I don't care how convenient Amazon is, I can't bring myself to buy something off of there knowing that I'm just contributing to someone's pain. It feels like an empty and hollow effort considering the amount of sales Amazon makes per day, plus I probably come off as holier-than-thou with this post, but it really makes me so sad. I worked in retail for a few years and it was so soul sucking, I can't imagine how it must be at Amazon. Some people really need to fucking piss off.
No. 501807
File: 1578350173127.jpg (31.99 KB, 539x480, 1448147831735.jpg)
It has barely been cold this entire winter in my fucking shitty city. It's never been like this. I don't care what people "might" remember because stats don't like. 60-70 degree had to be the average for Nov-Jan. Sun sets still early but holy shit its like Spring time here with the boiling sun hitting at you. Why aren't there more people complaining about this and seeing something is wrong!? Im living in a clown world
No. 501817
>>501807I live far, far up in Northern Europe and I have been going to work every day with thin office blouses under my coat… It has never been this warm before.
Fuck climate change deniers, Australia, boomers, whoever, just fuck everybody. Where's my snow?!
No. 501854
File: 1578368832690.jpg (62.84 KB, 748x602, EMaZcCRWwAASWxK.jpg)
I'm about a month into a downward depressive slide and I'm scared how far I might go. I just moved to a new state and have been trying to find a new therapist but no one is responding. The funny thing is that I'm a freaking therapist myself, so then I feel embarrassed of my field on top of just plain frustrated. Nothing feels ok. I can't sleep. It's making me feel like I've fallen out of love with my fiance, which freaks me out. I just want to isolate and die.
No. 501855
File: 1578369031408.jpeg (90.69 KB, 466x304, C118CA0C-F988-4C15-957A-C5C92B…)
I just want to stop being such a fucking friendless loser, but holy shit is committing to a friendship fucking terrifying
No. 501857
>>501856I have terrible luck with friends, most of them were extremely
toxic,(probably due to my being raised by a mother who abused me non stop and ignored me being sexually abused by family members.) I collected a few people who basic ruined my chances of making friends in my home town because it’s rather small and everyone seems to see me in a bad light because of my my ex boyfriend and few friends I had
No. 501860
>>501856Sorry to samefag.
I just feel like I’m just a stupid fucking neet loser who only cares about the the dumbest shit so I’ll never really have friends again because I’ve outgrown the age range in which you make friends through dumb stuff
No. 501906
>>501887Have you ever said no to a man that hates women? In a world where women literally get killed for rejecting incels, this is the best way to slowly and carefully reject a creepy man. If you humiliate them too hard who knows how they could react.
Fuck what you said, life sucks for women and we have to be careful.
No. 501923
File: 1578410260656.png (70.23 KB, 218x165, 1577892133015.png)
So I've just had an argument with the girl I've been talking to and that seemed such a good match for me, because I found out that she was just leading me on.
She's been openly flirting with me (even agreed with me when I said that people that flirt without being interested are cunts) and messaging me all day everyday until night, yet she denied the flirting and said she was just "being nice", I wasn't having none of it and called her out for gaslighting me.
Then she admitted liking me but said she's not emotionally available because she had a breakup recently and is only looking for friends, but she knows that I'm looking for a girlfriend. Said she doesn't want a rebound or a gf, yet we met on a dating app that she even paid for to unlock the premium features.
Even one time that she mentioned talking to another woman, she immediately clarified that it was an old married woman that she only talked to because she was a professional giving her tips for work, so not a dating option. Why would you feel the need to say that to a friend?
Basically I've been played with three times in a row within 12 months, each time because they flirted as a joke or as a way to get validation.
I'd question my own sanity at this point, but I've had my friends looking at the texts and everything and told me that I was right for assuming those girls were interested, and they're not the types that lie to me to make me feel good, they call me out when it's the case so I trust their judgement.
It's just so disappointing and I'm so pissed. Dating as a lesbian is already so hard because our dating pool is so small, but when you add this stuff it gets to nightmare mode. Feels like everytime I find someone who's a good match for me, they always turn out to be either boring, crazy, poly, living on the other side of the world or emotionally unavailable. Especially emotionally unavailable. It looks like destiny at this point, that I shouldn't have a partner now.
Sorry if it sounds dramatic, but I'm just really fed up with everything.
Tl;dr: Girl is a cunt who played with my feelings, now I just feel like rolling up in bed and sleeping for two days straight. Happy 2020
No. 501942
File: 1578414265061.jpg (143.38 KB, 753x500, 238482391723982183.jpg)
I fucking hate seeing single, childless women driving these things around.
I just hate it.
"Look at how rich my parents are! Look at how I'm sitting up higher than everyone else like the queen I am! Look at how much stronger and more independent than other women I am!"
Bitch you are the female version of little dick men who drive big trucks around.
Your car is the car version of a "may I speak to your manager" haircut.
Your car is fucking hideous and wasteful and it gets in the way of other people seeing stoplights.
You cannot drive for shit and are so bad at it that you probably shouldn't even be on the road, but you choose to put everyone else's lives in danger by buying an unnecessarily large Karen car.
You feel cooler and more independent than other women for being single in a CUV but you just look like a fucking soccer mom. You're coping with being single by fueling your sense of superiority over other women with a big expensive new car that's not even visually pleasing. Stop.
It's literally the exact same thing as little dick truck syndrome except most women feel like they are not allowed to openly mock other women for things like this. But they should.
Because I do not want to live in a world where there are so many big, ugly cars on the freeway owned by people who will never fully utilize them and who cannot fucking drive. It's horrifying. It's a symbol of pure greed and selfishness to me, buying shit that you don't need and will never actually use just to feel better than other people. I genuinely hate SUVs and CUVs. 90% of the people who buy them do not fucking need them and have no business lugging these grotesque pieces of shit around.
What's next, is everyone gonna be driving a semi-truck with an empty trailer around just cause?
No. 501972
>>501906>Have you ever said no to a man that hates women?I'm not sure
>>501887 is a woman, it looks like there's been an influx of males on lolcow recently.
No. 501974
File: 1578421356329.jpg (265.08 KB, 834x1024, depositphotos_163735302-stock-…)
I'm so tired of working at my family's business that I went out on a whim and looked up jobs and I decided to send a-pretty luckluster-CV for a waitressing job.
Just fyi, I'm totally the type of person who cannot handle waitressing but I'm so fed up with everyone that even just sending it feels like I'm doing something.I have never been interviewed in my life and I'm the total opposite of a normie or what they ask for but what if I can manage to pretend and it goes well despite the huge-ass stress such jobs?
I have a little hope that breaking away from my safezone and family will do wonders to my behaviour and that since I'll be an unknown person I'll manage to pull it off somehow without exposing myself as an asocial weirdo.
Ofc, there's the flip-side where I do terribly because I'm awkward af and barely know how to socialise and apply to jobs and go through the various processes since it's something new.Also my family finding out and reacting negatively is a big issue for me and I'm afraid of the reactions I'm going to get.
However I'm tired of not even trying things because of other people's judgement and stressing over the "what ifs".I may make a fool of myself(which is what my mind tells me) but there's a small chance I do well and I won't even know if I don't try.
Probably all this talk is for nothing since I probably won't be considered anyways but sometimes it's nice to think positively about the future.
No. 501976
File: 1578421912531.jpg (59.82 KB, 1148x714, 1577515843639.jpg)
>>501928Thanks anon. It's just so enraging and so disappointing. We had so many things in common, a matching humor, mutual attraction, and the place where she lives is near the city I'm moving in in two months. It really looked like everything was right.
But no, she was just using me as a validation tool and justified it by saying "I like you, but I can't have a relationship right now". She even used the typical non-apology "I'm sorry that YOU took it that way".
Now the rage phase has passed and I can feel the sad kicking in. Time for an all-night crying session.
No. 502002
Ever since getting out of a 4 year relationship a little over a year ago, I've adopted female dating strategy. I admit I can't relate to my girl friend's man problems anymore. Sometimes even when anons vent here it's hard to resist saying D U M P H I M but omg, I just keep seeing the same things play out over and over. How these men don't change, lie, and take advantage of good women while feeling no remorse.
One of my girlfriends is currently in an emotional downward spiral because the fuckboy that kept leading her on for the past year with all sorts of bullshit excuses on why they couldn't be official, up and picked someone else to be in an official relationship with. Her Facebook is deactivated and everything, because she insists on staying friends with the scum but obv seeing pics of him with the new girl is painful. She is very upset about it cause she had oneitis for this player, and basically doesn't wanna date again cause she fears being hurt.
I want to tell her that seeing other people might help her get over him, but for the love of all holy she needs to stop throwing herself at the mercy of these men. He claims he can't commit to you? Bye boy.
He only makes time for you when he conveniently wants sex? Bye boy.
At the very least she told me he was good in bed, so at least when he was treating her like an unpaid prostitute, the sex was good at least. I can't believe she spent a year of her life to otherwise get nothing else out of the bastard. She put in way too much emotional labor for it to turn out this way.
No. 502024
I feel like I'm perpetually on my period and I fucking hate period brain!!! I feel like I'm only fine for one week out of the month, and the other 2-3 weeks is my PMS (or I suspect PMDD but what difference does it make, I'm still fucking miserable all around) and period driving me up the fucking wall. On a good day I'm just craving affection and attention, on a bad day (which is most), everything irritates me, my paranoia and anxiety levels shoot up to high heaven, I fixate on the stupidest bullshit that I know I normally wouldn't care about, I just feel like a prisoner in my own body again.
I've done so much for myself and have worked so hard to become comfortable in my own skin and happy with myself and living. I've worked so hard to figure out values and things that make my life feel fulfilling, and when my period comes along, all of that just comes crashing down and it feels like everything has just been a false hope even though I know it's just my stupid illogical brain going haywire. It makes me doubt myself, it makes me feel like I'm back to fighting with myself, and after years of having this be my personal hell on earth, I'm so tired of it. I'm so, so tired. I feel so helpless, like all my true self can do is lay down and cry until this passes.
Then when it's over, it just STARTS UP AGAIN. Like, hello? I thought this was over? No? I have to just sit here and feel fucking miserable AGAIN? Well fuck me. I hate this so much.
No. 502029
>>501974Good luck with your job hunt!! Keep thinking positively!
>>501962>no lawsThere actually is. But only really for products sold in brick and mortar shops. If they're worried about safety, the only place to buy their products is in one of the big brand establishments (or direct from the manufacturer, if they insist on buying online). Anything sold on Amazon, Aliexpress, taobao, Craigslist or anywhere similar has pretty much no safety or consumer protection standards. It might be cheaper but it might be poisonous too. (Consumer protection and product safety regulations for products sold online does exist, but enforcement/consequences are lacking and the regulatory bodies are slow to react and still haven't figured out how to hold Amazon and the like to account. That's in the states anyway. In Europe and Australia, online sales are regulated as strictly as b&m sales, so maybe it'll get better here soon?)
No. 502030
>>502012>The entitlement! The poor billionaire water company owners needed your bill payment yesterday to chip into their "yacht fund". How could you be so selfish by just not having money to pay that bill???I hate when companies cut you off over minor shit. Hopefully your city/state gov has a consumer protection dept that you can complain to?
>colloidal oatmeal Btw, what's colloidal oatmeal?
No. 502032
File: 1578433121544.png (609.05 KB, 1487x934, 1578097177829.png)
I know lolcow doesn't condone eating disorders but I seriously don't know how to deal with mine without messing everything up. I know it's "just eat" but my poor body image… if I eat then I literally can't leave the house. My family is very not-supportive and will most likely abuse me if they find out too. My university has help but I'm worried they will put me on file since I'm already on file for other mental illnesses.
No. 502038
>>502024Hey anon I hope everything will be okay. This uncomfortable feeling will go away, maybe not today or tomorrow, but soon. Hang in there! I'm dealing with PMDD
after my period just ended. I have PCOS so that may be a factor in this as well lol. Anyways, I hope you find some time to relax. Drink plenty of water and do some aerobic exercise, hopefully that'll take off the edge for now.
No. 502082
File: 1578444045181.png (71.62 KB, 283x268, 2651FB0E-C344-407D-9F51-517FA7…)
>>500509Holy shit, my dumb fucking neighbours are at it again, the same fucking loud Russian song. I actually know how the fucking song goes now. I asked them to lower it them, and did (for the day) but it's back.
I SHOULDNT FUCKING KNOW THE LYRICS TO THE SONG OF SONG I'VE NEVER HEARD
FUCKING CHRIST ANONS, HELP
ITS GETTING STUCK IN MY HEAD
No. 502092
I hate it when I have a shitty therapist appointment. sometimes the appointments go really well and other times not so much. my therapist just really wants me to get a job (I'm a neet). and like, I do wanna get a job, but I would rather talk about the things that make it hard for me to work (my anxiety, my social skills, my social retardation, my irritability, my lack of organization and low self esteem) rather than just talk about what jobs I could apply for. he wanted to talk about job interviews and was trying to help me with job interview answers, which again is nice of him but our appointments are only 50 minutes long and there are SO MANY other things (including non job related things) that I want to talk about. I'm 25, turning 26 this summer and when I turn 26 I'll get cut off from my insurance and not be able to get therapy anymore, at least from him and I'd like to get as much out of the way as I can. is it rude to tell him I would rather talk about other things? I feel like it shouldn't be because it's my money, but I have also heard people say the therapist is supposed to be the one directing the conversation.
No. 502095
>>502092Has he explained his thinking?
A lot of what you say your problems are, seem to be pretty much geared around your fears about dealing with people at work. But all of those fears are, right now, literally just theoretical since you're not working right now.
He could be trying to move your discussions on to a more practical basis by hoping for you to get a real job (any job) and then discussing what real (and thus, not theoretical) issues that arise for you when you're immersed in a real working environment.
Not saying that your concerns are invalid. But he might have a strategy here, that he's hoping can identify further opportunities to help you with targeted help for specific issues.
No. 502106
>>502092Your post inspired me to vent as well…
I will be finally going to see therapist in a week and I am very scared. I have so many issues I don't know where to start and which should be handled first:
1.Depression (currently in remission due to meds)
2.AVPD + low social skills which make it impossible for me to get close to people
3.Trauma that makes me ashamed to talk about it because probably it does not seem like a Real Trauma™ to people who are not me and therefore have not experienced it.
4.My recently developed asexuality which apparently might not be caused by depression meds but my mental issues (not sure if I am buying it, but ok)
5.Low self-esteem
6.Shopping addiction
7.Anxious/negative thinking (might be part of depression).
It's a miracle I have not killed myself yet though I still feel like a bizzare case as I am Not That Bad As Other People™. I feel boty like a human fuckup and a spoiled millenial.
I still feel like I probably forgot about something. I will have to pay for each session so I am even more scared that things will got wrong… I tried therapy once and it went horribly wrong as my therapist was a cunt to me.
No. 502130
>>502123The thing is I keep getting rejected by men after
I do the asking out. It's never right away, but that's almost worse since then I really have no idea what's wrong with me.
I don't even shoot out of my league, my taste in men would be laughed off the earth by farmers tbh.
Maybe these guys were simply too lazy to date even a girl who dropped into their laps though. I'll take that idea to cope instead of cry tonight, thx anon.
No. 502133
>>502030lol forreal anon, though I've never thought of calling and complaining. To be honest I haven't had the best luck with the water company (before they put locks on I would just turn it back on myself and pay when I could so they aren't too fond of me but how tf am I supposed to go days without water because they shut off mid-week and I don't have the money til Friday??)
& colloidal oatmeal is just finely milled oatmeal that you can use in a bath to soothe irritated/itchy skin. It's a life-saver for my eczema in the dry winter months!
No. 502136
File: 1578453148805.jpg (9.53 KB, 232x200, 3455.jpg)
My fiancé just has one year left in his service for the military, and I'm super worried about him being deployed.
Not to mention Im flying back to Canada now so that’s also not helping my anxiety
No. 502141
>>502113you mean to tell me even like, guys online aren't interested, or just irl? i refuse to believe that "femcels" can't find guys online or on mobile apps that aren't chomping at the bit to date.
>>502125ugh, i'm sorry. i deal with gastritis on the regular. i would suggest not taking any pain meds for them because it seriously tears up your stomach even worse. florastor helps, it's just expensive as fuck. see if you can get some kind of equivalent gastrointestinal supporting probiotic like florastor, not just any probiotic for general purposes. are you taking any proton pump inhibitors to help heal the gastritis? or like, cimetidine even, really helped me, but at high doses. like, 800 mg. all i know is literally every time i take painkillers it stalls the healing like mad so unfortunately i've found that the best results come from putting up with the intense annoying dull ache until it starts to heal, and eating foods to lessen the ache. the foods help a little. maybe try something like infant rice/wheat cereal with probiotics like Nestum. it's delicious and doesn't disturb the stomach.
No. 502151
>>501863i feel you anon. my best friend has an ed and constantly talks about how she hasn't eaten since yesterday or how she keeps losing weight and it's fully
triggered me back into a relapse. i don't blame her at all obviously, and i dont want to hurt/
trigger her so i never mention any of my thoughts/behaviors, but it's p unfortunate
No. 502197
>>502151To you and other anon: if what your friend says
triggers your own eating issues it's just fine to tell them to talk about it with someone else or at least tone it down. If they're good friends they won't get mad at you for it.
No. 502202
>>502196Does he throw that preference in your face? If he does, it’s a big red flag, that’s very disrespectful.
>>502199Anon, what exactly is going on with you (if you wish to speak more about it)?
No. 502207
>>502202He actually tries quite hard to make me believe he's not really into boobs and more of an "ass man", which I guess is kinda nice…
But we were in the same friend group before dating and I vividly remember him talking about being blessed because so many of his classmate had big breast and how he really wanted to see them, also he would sometimes talk about a girl he had a one night stand with who had "hypnotizing huge tits".
No. 502221
>>502032Same but I ain't ready to make an effort to recover, despite wanting to.
I have this irrational plan of getting to 95lbs and maintaining for as long as I can before I get over it.
I don't have the money to go to treatment and I haven't actually told my parents. They have suspected it and made comments but all I do is lie and lie. I lie to my friends my boyfriend my family. I can't be honest to my family because in our culture they don't understand. I'm not trying to be uwu smol and dainty and I'm just afraid of losing control of the one thing I have right now.
No. 502224
File: 1578485964122.jpeg (262.21 KB, 828x403, C6EB3C09-36BD-4BF2-83EB-30CDD7…)
Just finished my last college class for the day and I almost cried in class. I don't know. I just began to feel really lonely all of a sudden. I really have no friends, and it hurts seeing everyone around in their friendship groups. The girl who normally sits next to me moved across from me today. I know I'm overthinking it, but I can't help but just wonder why? Am I annoying? I rarely speak… it's so boring. It's much better being alone than being bullied or faking myself to fit in, but having to go through 8 hour days with no one to talk to gets really boring and lonely. I finish a lot of my work early, so I seriously just sit around refreshing lolcow over and over again because I have nothing else to do! I have to put up with this for another 2 years, ugh. I wish I had just one person to talk to. It would make the boredom and loneliness so much easier to bare at least.
No. 502246
>>502232I don't know what it's like to be a dude but I have a preference for small breasts because big ones remind me too much of my mother and close family, that's probably a weird Freudian thing but I'm almost flat myself so I just don't relate to them. I would never put another girl down for naturally having them though and I'm sure if I met the love of my life I wouldn't let huge tits get in the way of it (kek)
If someone is outwardly taking shit about big breasts they probably have a madonna/whore complex, ED or are a pedo
No. 502249
File: 1578493810776.jpg (96.54 KB, 870x740, original.jpg)
>>502038Thank you anon. Some other anons have suggested CBT workbooks for bpd anon and I have one downloaded so I'm going to work on it. It sucks having to live like this but gaining better skills at managing myself is all I can do I guess.
No. 502253
The double standards and excuses people make for my mom are minimizing to me.
I haven't spoken to her in a year come May. Her side of the family keeps pestering me to speak to her, and my stepdad does so out of guilt. Whenever I tell my family about the final straw she broke for me to not want to see her, and how up to that point she had done many things to tense our relationship before, they always got an excuse for her. Or a story, or a reason why she's had a bad time and that's why I just gotta put up with her behavior cause she liked tried her best, k? What about my bad time, and my efforts over the years to built a rapport that never lasts because she's a paranoid cluster B? Most of my family won't even hear me out and think I'm a traitorous disgusting person for turning on fAaAAamily. Even though everyone has always treated me more as a blacksheep or oddball. Is the lack of support I've gotten supposed to be proof of the strong familial bond I'm just not being grateful enough for?
Is it any wonder why I can be such a doormat. It's not like I was allowed to have boundaries, or to be right in my anger no matter how justified. I always gotta apologize to, serve, and excuse people who did me wrong for reasons. I've had it. If everyone wants to pretend I'm suddenly a bitch for standing my ground and sticking up for myself, then so be it. None of them have to sit and sleep in my skin.
What's especially shit about it is, that the things she allegedly went through to cause her to be how she is? Those are things I've been through too! If not sometimes worse than her. Where is my army of excuse makers for whenever I'm a shit to somebody? Where are my personal bullies that strongarm people back into my life regardless if they want me or not? Oh wait, no. Those powers are for she and not for thee.
No. 502254
File: 1578495770572.jpeg (1.21 MB, 1090x1920, 194570B0-5906-4E4B-B8B1-DDA553…)
Why did this jackolantern looking troon advertised this shit
His chest hair disgusts me
No. 502311
File: 1578508129328.png (2.48 MB, 3375x3375, sfegehghrr.png)
There was a highly upvoted thread on reddit where there was a graph (pic related), about the actor's dating preference for younger women which is nothing new. However, the comments are just awful. Most of them are gleeful about the fact that women "hit the wall" or that women are practically useless in their opinion. Even when a guy says that there's nothing to worry about because most men "compromise" on dating within their own age range it's not convincing at all. The consensus is that men would if they could choose a younger woman, almost in every case and that's terrifying. When I worked at a desk in a spa, I constantly got hit on men, middle aged and up to 4 times older than me, never mind that their wife was with them. I really wish I wasn't straight because it's downright terrible. Yet I want to have a romantic relationship but I know I'll probably end up with someone who's going to dump me the moment I'm in my 30s.
No. 502329
>>502311Old men are gross and i will never fall for this whole ~aging like wine~ thing. They feel too entitled to young women and they need to be put in their place.
Sad thing is that thanks to choice feminism shit like this is less likely to be called out.
I'm leo's current gf's age and i look like a fucking teen so imagine if this young woman actually looked a couple years younger than she is…how fucking creepy would that look….
No. 502342
File: 1578515647951.gif (1.33 MB, 400x201, tumblr_inline_ovl46k54Yt1t4o4z…)
>>502315 mood and a half, anon. let's end this timeline together.
No. 502348
>>502311I feel zero sympathy for the women who chase these big name men who KNOW the extent of their womanizing. These women know exactly what they're getting out of it–the attention and money–and when it's over they can move on as attractive women with options who slept with famous so and so.
What they enable for the rest of us peasant women to deal with is the attitude that we hit walls when we turn 30, and that older and less attractive men are entitled to bombshell young models.
I don't like them. They deserve all the wrinkled low effort dick that can be mustered.
No. 502352
>>502348Yeah me too. It's just depressing to see how many common men feel entitled to under 30 girlfriend even if they themselves are older. Spending a considerable time on chans and reddit has made me very wary of men and their ability to actually love long term.
>>502329The men that would hit on me at work were all ugly and less attractive than their wives but they still had audacity to bother me long after I told them a firm no. Their wives wouldn't even be far away. I used to look at older men with sympathy (65+) because I thought they weren't horny anymore and I loved my grampa so I never saw older men as a threat. I was unfortunately very wrong. A few wouldn't hesitate to bitch about their wives because they were ill so they had to suffer having no sex. It was absolutely disgusting but I digress.
No. 502358
>>502353Imo, 20s is the time to "experiment" and do drugs if there's ever a time to have done them. People have (presumably) way more personal and financial freedom due to having their own places, access to cars, and jobs where they can make money. Their brains are literally more developed and can access the risk of going to certain places and consuming certain drugs better. Some–not all.
Kids that I knew who partied before they hit 18 were real burners. For one thing, they were always in trouble because they were young and dumb. They'd either get into legal issues, or just put themselves in riskier situations. They often had no money to buy quality drugs, so unless they were spending their part time McDonald's wage or mommy and daddy's money, their drugs and booze sucked because the standard was whatever they could get their hands on. Not only that, but they're frying their brains early in their development.
High school and having a part time job honestly kept me so fucking busy that even during my early years of college I had no leftover time or energy to party much anyway.
No. 502385
>>502353In middle school, there was a time when we used to just watch that show "Intervention." I specifically remember one episode focused on a girl who accomplished to much in the eyes of my young self, including having interned for the White House. She ended up doing cocaine or some shit and completely ruining everything. My dad also really likes watching those drug bust shows on TV and would plead with me growing up to never do drugs. I was very big into arts and crafts and he'd always buy me anything (copic markers, a sewing machine, etc) while always telling me "I will support anything you do as long as you don't do drugs."
My aversion to drugs went from fear to just… I don't care for it lol. I hung out with the nerds in my college, and the only drugs I had exposure to was weed (I'm not even sure if people in my small arts college did hard drugs, but my circle certainly didn't). I never ended up trying weed because the smell is too much for me. I don't even drink (though this is mostly because it started giving me heart palpitations).
Whenever I see people brag about drugs and alcohol, I can't help but think they're trying to overcompensate for something. Or maybe I'm just a fucking no fun prude lol. I live a very happy and boring vanilla life so I just don't see the appeal of partying and drugs and alcohol.
No. 502414
>>502409It's more likely you're anxious or sick rather than pregnant, you're still in a normal window for periods (dunno how to phrase that, normal cycle)
Sometimes undereating, stress etc can have a big effect.
No. 502424
File: 1578530659062.jpeg (35.64 KB, 376x373, C2A2039A-3EF5-49B0-8FFB-2326CD…)
>>502333Please get help if you can anon. Stay safe, I love you
No. 502429
>>502253I'm in the same boat and haven't spoken with my mom in 4 going on 5 years now. She's impossible to talk to , feigns not understanding English when its convenient, has hidden money from me that was handed down by other relatives, and was physically
abusive to me in childhood. She would be so manipulative to the point of telling neighbors and friends of hers personal and embarrassing details pf my life and getting them to message me and guilt me back into speaking with her. She even found out where I lived and stalked me down a few times to spy on me. You're not obligated to love somebody that is destructive to you purely on the basis of blood relation
No. 502430
>>502416I had sex twice during what the app predicted was my ovulation/chance to get pregnant period (18th and 23rd of December) but we used a condom both times. I had sex again like a week later on the 29th which was after the “chance to get pregnant” period and we used a condom but before he put the condom on he did kinda half Enter me for a few seconds but then we stopped and he put on a condom before we actually started having sex.
And then I’ve had sex a few times after that but always with a condom the whole time. My cycle is very regular. Always 27-28 days for the last like year almost. And if it’s not 27-28 it’s usually shorter. I’ve been stressed out but I’ve been stressed since like October and this is the first time my period has been affected lol.
Anyway assuming I don’t get my period in the next few days when is the soonest I can get an accurate result on a pregnancy test? Is a week after the day I was supposed to start fine? (So on the 13th)
No. 502443
File: 1578536007190.png (23.39 KB, 710x432, Arab_empire.png)
>>502435Yep its only been white anglo-saxon men who engaged in conquest and Slavery, I mean Greeks, Romans, Arabs, Turks, Chinese, Persians, Mongols all weren't really doing it were they
No. 502446
>>502443But you have to admit in the current Western world Anglo-Saxon men are spergs
but i think Indian and Pakistani men exceed their spergdom
No. 502447
>>502443I know other nations did as well but I feel like anglo-saxon men and Northern European men have done it more recently in history and more brutally, originally I was trying to explain to myself why anglo saxon men feel the most entitled to not only women but the whole world.
Maybe I expressed myself incorrectly but I know that saxons weren't the first or only to colonize and be destructive and enslave and destroy the world but they define the more recent history of our world. Maybe I demonized them maybe I'm right, who knows. I don't know, it's just the way I thought about it.
No. 502454
>>502253I'm honestly surprised how universal this issue is.
I've had my biological father straight up tell me "there's no such thing as a bad parent, they're just inexperienced." Well, if a good parent is considered someone who basically does the bare minimum and what's legally required for someone to raise a child, I don't think that's good, it's what's expected. I will never forgive both my mom and dad for consistently bullying me since I started puberty up until I moved out of town. They definitely meant it. My mom definitely meant to threaten me with law enforcement multiple times because I wouldn't answer her texts due to me fucking sleeping.
Bad parent? No way! It's just "tough love!" FUCK. It's been about 7 months since that mess and I'm still shaken up how she's getting away with it and excused by everyone else in the family.
No. 502470
File: 1578542299228.jpeg (59.88 KB, 600x600, FCF50557-A3B7-40BD-9DB3-245DE0…)
tfw pic related
my body count is 3 because of this dumb "sex positivity uwu" shit
No. 502501
File: 1578552177672.png (74.89 KB, 640x320, ADTWO49alt.png)
>>502202
>Anon, what exactly is going on with youI tried to write this twice yesterday but I think it's redudant and confusing to analyse so I'll simply go by saying that I grew up as an asocial due to family circumstances and general awkwardness and I ended up anxious and depressed.I work at my family's business and I REALLY fucking hate working here but at the same time I'm too much of a social retard to do anything else.I also dont have motivation to start anything new and have left stuff I need to finish on the side because whenever I try to do them I end up feeling like shit.In general it seems like idk how to learn new stuff anymore and I get distracted easily
I seriously feel like I'm relapsing with my depression lately and the feeling of "I wanna yeet myself and be done with life" is very strong.I have arranged a therapy appointment since I hadnt one in a while which will help,but still I've stagnated a lot
My problems aren't big or TOO serious but it's impossible for me to keep a positive attitude lately
No. 502510
>>502504Are you just dieting, or also exercising? Do some weight training and it will sculpt you and help build up your self-esteem because of how strong you realize you are
If it persists mentally, you gotta start there and worry about your body second
No. 502511
my dad committed suicide a week before my birthday this past spring. my mom has been a hard drug addict since i was 11. my best friend from when i was an edgy stupid teenager just overdosed and died this past october (he struggled often with suicidal ideation, so i have a hunch it may have been intentional, though obviously i can't say with certainty since he is gone now). my mom's raging polysubstance abuse graduated to smoking meth around 4 years ago. she had intense drug induced psychosis, and thought she was being gangstalked, and that her gang stalkers were living in the walls of her house. she lost custody of my teenager sisters and attempted suicide by means of burning her house down. her two dogs who she loved very much died of complications due to the severe smoke inhalation from the fire. after her arson/suicide attempt, she went to rehab and moved back in with me and my grandma. for the first ten months or so she was sober, but it was still deeply triggering to be living in close proximity with the woman who gave me complex PTSD as a child and teenager. after the ten month mark she began her self destructive downward spiral back into relapses and meth induced psychosis. she tried to run over her ex boyfriend with my grandma's car, gaslit and emotionally abused me and my grandma nonstop when she was intoxicated or spiralling into her drug induced psychosis, she took a huge axe and threatened to smash my grandma's windshield and trash the house if she didn't give her 300$ (which my grandma didn't even have). she's gotten violent, been institutionalized repeatedly, had the cops called on her at various points, but she's great at acting "normal"/lucid to get her way, and avoid being arrested or taken to the psych ward.
she relapsed on meth again several days ago and went into the most intense drug induced psychosis i've ever witnessed her experience. she thought my grandma's body had been taken over by the devil, and that everyone in our home was being possessed by satan. she got violent. tried to push the woman who came over to help us clean our house down the stairs. almost attacked my grandma like the feral tweaker she has unfortunately become. we had to call the police, but she put on her lucid act so they didn't take her downtown to detox, even though she had been going into psychotic rages, and had become violent and was making threats. i've been forced to live with her for almost 4 years now, because my trauma and mental health is so abysmal that i struggle to function even with all of the help my grandma has been giving me. it doesn't help that she has been consistently gaslighting, abusing, and retraumatizing me with all of this schizophrenic horror movie bullshit every time she relapses and goes into psychosis. she's hidden my medication from me (which i require to function at a basic level, as i have severe bipolar and need mood stabilizers to remain stable), and done so many horrendous things to me and my grandma that i don't even know where to begin listing them off, or where to begin giving context for the absolutely insane and evil shit she's done and continues to do. also, she drunk drives with me and my (underage) sisters in the car. i didn't know she was drunk when she offered to drive me somewhere, and she almost killed us both (not being dramatic, she would have driven full speed into a huge river if she hadn't hit a tree, which subsequently totalled the car).
i do feel bad for her in some sense, because she had some trauma of her own and i know she didn't choose a life of unhinged addiction and psychosis. however, she's ruined me and my sisters' lives, given my grandma legitimate stockholm syndrome, and i genuinely think she is an outright evil and almost sociopathic person, who operates on a primal/animalistic tweaker level when she's using. i try really hard to be as strong and resilient as i can, because my grandma is a widow and leans on me for emotional support, but i do sometimes reach a breaking point from all of the trauma and insanity i have to live with every day. it feels like the universe is trying its best to break me down and render me a desensitized traumatized husk. i wish people would stop dying. i often wish that my mother had died instead of my grandpa, my dad, and my former best friend. this has been going on for almost 12 years now, and i've given up on any sort of hope of escaping it, or things resolving on their own. she doesn't give a fuck, she doesn't want to get better or get clean, and she will never take responsibility for her own life. i've been a NEET since i was 16 due to health problems and trauma making it difficult to keep up with school, and i feel like an inept deeply stunted and broken womanchild who could never become a functional adult on my own. i'm planning to move out with a long time friend and get an apartment together, maybe even go to school. i don't think i'm cut out for independence or being a functional adult like my non traumatized peers. i don't know where to begin building a real life for myself outside of this living hell, and i don't know if there's even any hope to unpack and process what i've been through thus far.
i am on the precipice of giving up entirely and submitting myself to a base drug/alcohol fuelled existence like my mom, because i've been slowly developing problems with drinking and substance abuse to cope with the severe constant stress and being retraumatized on a regular basis. i don't know what the fuck to do and i think it would be easier on my family and handful of friends if i became a piece of shit like my mom before finally ending it, so that they can compartmentalize and give up on me and sever ties, reducing the severity of potential trauma or grief over my (seemingly) inevitable suicide. this isn't a cry for help and i don't want pity or attention for my shitty life. i'm posting this here because any time i try to open up about this on even a reductive surface level, people get overwhelmed or don't know how to react. i don't think my life is the worst it could be, don't get me wrong, but trying to confide about people in this makes me feel alienated, and activates my burden complex. it doesn't help that i don't know anyone with similar ongoing issues in their life, so the reactions i get just make me feel more alienated and alone, and like i won't ever meet somebody who understands what i'm going through on a daily basis.
don't feel obligated to reply to this post or encourage me not to kill myself, i just need to get this off my chest somewhere anonymously because i don't have anyone i feel i can talk to about this. the place where i live is experiencing a huge meth crisis, and it makes me really upset when people joke about meth addicts or make ironic shitposts about doing meth. i feel like a retarded child for being so upset when i see it, but i just say nothing, because i don't know where to begin explaining why it upsets me. i'm so ashamed of the state of my life that i don't think i'd want to explain anyways.
i really feel like if i don't get out of here soon i will commit suicide. i came very close to succeeding during my last attempt, i was unconscious in the ICU for a couple of weeks. i know what to do to ensure success if i do it again, and reminding myself of this is pretty much the only thing that calms me down or brings me peace when shit hits the fan at home. life has pretty much broken me down for half of my life, and i'm terrified of hoping for an escape or for things to get better. any time i make some modicum of progress or restore some basic semblance of stability, my mom comes in like a nuclear missile and i end up worse off than i started. i'm really sorry if this seems pathetic or attention whoring, i don't have a therapist and as i said, any time i try to confide in people about this, they get overwhelmed or make me feel alienated and alone (even if they mean well). i just have no hope anymore and no idea where to go from here
No. 502517
>>502511wow anon that's a lot to take in for sure.I understand your feelings of hopelessness even though I haven't been through any of that
one question though.even though you said she has been in institutions and the cops being called on her, how "normal" can she act to get away with being locked up for good?you and your family have been in genuine danger a number of times.are the services there that incompetent?
i hope you and your family manage to stay safe somehow and finding peace eventually even though it really seems impossible.i wont tell you that things will get better or anything like this but i hope somehow turn for the better
No. 502519
File: 1578559942495.gif (382.36 KB, 376x268, 5s88.gif)
>>502511Fuck I'm sorry anon. My parents weren't drug addicts but since 2014 my life's been on a downward spiral of life fucking me over. I get it I really do. Theres always some problem slightly out of my hands that I'm expected to brush over like it doesn't largely affect my life. It's always family problems that are weird to explain. I understand deeply being alienated, ignored, and passed over for the situations. People usually have normal lives that don't involve all this so they say sorry then move on. Heck there's no right way or place to post those kind of vents it feels like. My sibling did/does have a drug problem but despite all the abuse had to keep em for some legal work. Knowing I couldn't escape because that had to get done was a living hell. On top of them taking thousands in family money. I had so many thoughts of just kms along the way. I just want you to know you're not alone. I'm sorry there isn't a good place or person to properly let it all out. I hope things get better for you cause damn am I trying.
No. 502530
File: 1578569001748.jpeg (190.44 KB, 1070x828, 25EAA914-C5D1-40A3-8AAA-CA7D70…)
I hate how lustful most men are. My new boyfriend and I have been together since Christmas, and he truly is amazing. Not just an amazing boyfriend, but a truly kind and compassionate human being. The best I've ever had and maybe even the best person I've ever met. But it seems as though whenever I get into a new relationship, I start having more flashbacks of being molested as a child, if that makes sense?? I don't know why.
Whenever I get into a new relationship, I start having more nightmares and random flashbacks of my abuse. It feels like this will never fully go away. Knowing that pedophilia will never truly be eradicated makes me completely lose hope in humanity. I know that boys get molested too, but facts are it just happens so much more to girls. I'll be so relieved if I have a son instead of a daughter, as stupid as that sounds, I'm just so scared still.
No. 502544
>>502292Skinny twinks still look very male, though. Only men will meme that emphasized secondary female characteristics are "gross".
>>502539I agree with that
>>502246I agree that they likely have a madonna/whore complex, have ED, or are pedophiles. It seems to almost always have the case lol
No. 502688
It's stupid since I'm still surprisingly enjoying my current education, but I've suddenly been hit with a deep sadness over missing out on art school. It wasn't a financially viable option for me at the time and my future would have been much more insecure than it is now, but I still feel…displaced? Nostalgic for what never happened?
I'll never get to go to classes centered around my biggest interest or meet and commiserate with fellow artists in real life. I'll never work in the industry, even if I pump out my own projects on the side (which I am) it's not the same as having art
be my life.
>>502628What kind of romantic things?
A guy did this to me over Christmas and it just left me feeling crazy. It's surely gaslighting of some sort.
No. 502698
>>502628Guys are all about writing out checks they can't cash when it comes to romantic stuff with women. They like to think they
can do things - get a girl, be a boyfriend, whatever, and then bail when they realize they can't, and pretend you just imagined the whole thing as an excuse to never apologize.
Men with stamina in terms of relationships are hard to find.
No. 502700
>>501915Trust me anon, it's not schizo or crazy. The whole reason all this journalist harassment started for me was that I was an idiot and made a public Facebook post related to something already of media interest, and it got screenshotted and posted by a notoriously shitty "media" company (if you would be so kind to call it that), and then forever my name was ruined. Mind you, I wasn't even 18 at the time, so they fucked up big time but it was too late to get the photo removed by the time my name and post were reposted to dozens of media sites. If I wasn't an idiot and didn't make that facebook post public, I wouldn't have had to literally legally change my name and become a ghost. The less social media you have, the better. Some other tips: use different usernames for everything possible, use multiple emails for serious business vs promotional sign ups and whatnot. Don't put your last name into anything if it isn't required, never allow apps to access your contacts, since then usually other people can find you by phone. I heavily suggest removing your personal info from whitepages, familytreenow, spokeo, etc. They make it a hassle to remove, but you can opt out of nearly every single people look up site. And also every couple months be checking for your email, phone number, and name on sites to see what information is attached. You can never be too secure online.
No. 502702
>>502689You're supposed to
show and say it, anon. Fancier way of saying dump him, lmao
No. 502714
File: 1578623968213.jpg (35.29 KB, 750x1334, zbeusnhxuxiy.jpg)
>tfw online sale going on
>take hours to scan through thousands of items, settle on a select few
>finally get to check out
>my "holy grail" item gets sold out
>get sad
>whatever
>week later
>click my bookmarked link for said "holy grail" item to mourn what never was
>item gets back in stock
>rejoice!
>be cheapass so settle on the longer shipping cause it's free
>items finally arrive today
>receive two out of the six items i purchased
>open my other package assuming the rest are in there
>open it up
>it's fucking toddler clothes
RRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Customer support was shit and all I got was a lousy refund.
No. 502721
File: 1578627075514.jpg (281.91 KB, 1080x591, 20200110_053126.jpg)
>>502719Ikr, doesn't it also kinda look too upturned or small?
No. 502723
>>502719I thought it looked the same but I'm attributing that to 1) swelling 2) she never turns to side and 3) wears glasses.
The photo that
>>502721 posted is a very noticeable difference but in the video I honestly could not tell.
No. 502751
File: 1578639838310.jpg (84.66 KB, 300x300, 1481425871578.jpg)
I lost a relative a couple of days ago and this is pretty much the first time I've had to experience someone close to me passing away and I don't really know how to feel, or how I am supposed to feel, so in turn I get this kind of an empty feeling. I did cry when I heard the news and I've experienced a few moments of sadness but other than that it's just… nothing, and I'm feeling like I should be more grieving about this. Also I've had this problem with my family the entire life where I'm afraid of failure and I feel like they'll get mad at me for not being sad enough about my grandpa dying. Sorry for the messy explanation, just wanted this out of my system.
No. 502758
File: 1578641624849.gif (997.4 KB, 500x281, 767667876.gif)
i'm such a shitty fucking person and i do nothing for the world by existing in it. i wanna kill myself but idk if I should come clean to everyone or at least my siblings in my suicide note that I was sexually abused over and over again by my dad when i was 5? nobody knows but me and my parents, my mom covered it up. i mean they (my siblings) would at least understand the root of my trauma and why i chose to kill myself but it'd ruin their lives forever, they think my dad is a normal and honorable man. then again if i don't explain anything they'll still be tormented. fuck this isn't fair why do people have to give a shit about me? I need to move out. it's so much easier for people to move on when you're not in their life.
No. 502770
File: 1578646387131.jpg (60.34 KB, 470x483, FUUUUUUUUU.jpg)
"if there's nothing pathological wrong with you, you dont have a reason to feel bad.plz support me emotionally or im going to burst"
I HAVE BEEN HAVING SUICIDAL THOUGHTS ALMOST DAILY FOR ABOUT THE PAST TWO WEEKS AND IM TRYING HARD TO KEEP IT TOGETHER AND I GET TO HEAR THIS SHIT SERIOUSLY FUCK OFF
No. 502781
File: 1578653018852.jpeg (80.78 KB, 1152x1200, 7B4AC7AD-AC06-42DF-8347-5343DF…)
>>502524Good luck anon.
>>502688I’m sorry, if anything a lot of anons on here tend to say art school isn’t worth it
>>502751I don’t really know what to say since I think I would be the complete opposite. But it’s not uncommon to feel empty or whatever especially if you didn’t see him that often.
>>502762Can you shower maybe? :(
>>502770Holy shit, are you me? I’m sorry you have to go through that
No. 502783
File: 1578655284806.png (3.9 KB, 234x216, iknowthefeelbro.png)
>>502781>Holy shit, are you me? I’m sorry you have to go through thatthanks anon.I have been sperging sporadically in this thread the past few days bc my circumstances have gotten intolerable.it's definitely not as bad as many anons here but i hate this shit
the person who said that to me hasnt realised how bad my depression is after all these years and probably has less emotional intelligence than a bumblebee.thankfully im in a slightly better mood today so i didnt take it to heart as much but fuck this shit.like
do i have to cut myself or get seizures to be taken seriously AGAIN???i dont have the inclination or actually want this anymore
idk your circumstances anon but i hope you manage with this shit
No. 502785
File: 1578658350554.jpg (33.61 KB, 540x521, 1561316603922.jpg)
My mother started working at home a few months ago, and it makes me feel so anxious, annnoyed and angry, i wanna go back to being alone all day, now i have to be with my mother, her bf and his son. I fucking want to die, i need to be alone but cannot move and the only way i can feel good is by sleeping in the day and enjoying the night. I hate being like this but i had gone to psychologist all my life and there is nothing wrong with me, i just need to be alone or else i get anxious and very angry.
No. 502797
>>502792Aww i'm sorry about that, anon. There's always someone who has to say unnecessary shit and ruin someone's day. You seem passionate about it and that's really nice to see.
Pls don't feel demoralized and continue with your projects!
No. 502808
>>502224I have realized from experience that when you don't talk/interact much, people assume you aren't interested in talking, so they leave you alone.
Just giving a quick smile or asking a question can open you up to conversation
No. 502847
There's more and more compounding circumstances that indicate I was a bandaid baby for my mother's failing marriage with my bio dad and it pisses me off. I had a very lonely, sad, and neglected childhood because of this. Her and him are the types of people who should have never reproduced
Neither of them had a nurturing or patient bone in their body. I never felt a parental connection with them past a certain age. I don't love either of them as an adult and haven't seen the bio dad in over a decade. I'm not contact with my mom because of her self-centered outbursts and constant narcissism.
With her it makes me more bitter because I cannot criticize who she is as an adult without hearing "BUT SHE WAS ABUSED! YOUR DAD REALLY FUCKED HER UP!" Really? So her present behavior can be excused by a past circumstance that happened close to 30 years ago? It's okay that she never got help for her issues because she's lazy and also has a boomer attitude that psychology is bullshit? Oh he was abusive! So that's why she never brought his terrible abuse up in court during the many years of custody battles, and why I was forced against my will to see this man in my preteens and wasted my childhood with weekends and summers spent at his dumpy shack without basics, like a kitchen or a bathroom, where he'd ignore and neglect me?
No, I'm pretty sure the answer is actually his child support check and her image. Because after my stepdad adopted me with the promise that my dad wouldn't be obligated to pay child support anymore, he fucked off real quick. The story today is that she wanted me to have a "father figure." She's full of shit. Either he was a sociopathic abuser who shouldn't have been granted partial custody of a child, or he wasn't. What does that make her to have fed me to that shark knowing he had a vendetta against her, and had allegedly beat her and attempted to kill her by choking? She can barely disguise her lie. He was so neglectful, manipulative, and emotionally abusive towards me. And yet I couldn't articulate what was happening to me because I didn't have the words, or the insight to know what was happening and why for. What I used to hate the most, is that whenever I was upset at my bio dad this bitch would actually make excuses for him too "His abusive upbringing though!"
You know the irony? I'm not allowed to justify my shit behavior based on THEIR abuse and neglect towards me, I just have to accept consequences, unlike they who get to blame shit that occurred between 30-50 years ago. No exaggeration.
To top it off, because I was the intended to settle down my bio dad's neglectful and abusive ways, that when it didn't work out my life became the unrepayable debt to my mom. Because she sacrificed herself to have me and wound up being a single mom for a few years–before she monkey branched to her third marriage to my stepdad of course. In my adult years she attempted to guilt trip me by saying I was a miracle baby after so many miscarriages. I've always had to show gratitude and give constant thanks for whatever breadcrumbs she threw my way for the fact. She was taking care of his child. I've always felt like her side of the family treated me as a black sheep too because I have his blood ergo I'd be like him even though I'm a girl and was socialised differently.
I've had my own relationships that had lasted longer than their entire marriage, her pregnancy, and my birth combined. I know how unstable their situation was now, and how they're both such morons. It's made me realize how much suffering it's caused, because my mom was and is such a fucking pickme. There's one condolence: In that I've never been as much of a dumb bitch, and I'm petrified about making children suffer. I will never marry multiple men or have a baby in an attempt to fix a failing marriage with a shit person. At least through all my failed relationships (which to my credit were trials and errors because I never ever had an example of a healthy adult relationship to follow) I've never brought a child into the world to suffer like I did. For a man.
It makes me a bit jealous when I see popular people post their new babies to social media to see all the outpouring of love and support they get, knowing that I was not acknowledged like that and basically pushed into a corner all my life when I didn't settle the purpose of locking down my bio dad. I had a brief second wind through academia when my mom thought I would become super successful and boost her image as a good parent. But ever since I took an average office job after being burnt out, she had been back to being disappointed in me and being hyper critical again. Even though I've accomplished so much more than her or anyone else in my family. Because my life isn't on her terms, I'm a giant failure. Maybe had I been born with a cock and balls, she would've adored everything I did and handed me things on a silver platter. Like what my family did with my criminal male cousin who never earned anything but got everything handed to him.
My hatred runs deep.
No. 502848
i've been working at a BDSM adult store for 4-5 months and i have a crush on my coworker. it's confusing because working at a place like this means that i have no idea what exactly is "NSFW". i've been operating under the assumption that sexual contact is not allowed, but i'm not even sure, and i'm afraid to ask. we keep lowkey flirting, but i keep giving off signals that i'm not interested (even though i totally am) just because i'm worried about things getting weird. worst case scenario is that something gets messy down the line, and we're stuck at work together. i've just been trying to avoid any future awkwardness/drama, but at the same time i desperately want them to spank me until i cry and rail me hard. i just know that because the nature of the job, it will be hard to separate "on the clock" and "off the clock".
yesterday, my coworker posted something on their instagram story (i'm on their close friends list…) that was asking for someone who could come clean their apartment in a maid outfit while they watched and made humiliating comments. i'm convinced that this was somewhat directed at me, because this is something that we've vaguely talked about and they used specific language that seemed like a lowkey reference to things i've said. i figured that this was my perfect "in", to test the waters. but i saw the posts too late, because my boyfriend (we're poly) also saw and took the job. this surprised me, because i didn't think he was into that sort of thing, but he said he's been trying to be more adventurous. i'm trying to be happy for him (i mean, the thought of him doing it is still fucking hot) but it's hard because i'm so envious that it isn't me.
basically, i'm sick of always repressing my feelings in order to keep the peace. sometimes i get really bratty when i can't get what i want, and i don't like that side of me. i can already feel the resentment building, but i don't know what to do about it
No. 502852
>>502850yeah and I noticed women who do this are assholes and vicious to other women.
Toxic borderline energy vibez
No. 502860
>>502850i really regret writing that bratty comment and the thing about resentment, it was really dramatic and i promise i don't really care THAT much about it. this just isn't something i can talk to my friends or bf about, so i posted this here. i refuse to apologize for being horny. you're right that i should care less, though.
>>502852i'm a gay man
>>502855what sucks is that i'm 80% sure that my coworker DOES want to fuck me, so honestly it's not rejection i'm worried about, it's that i care a lot about what my supervisors would think if they found out. it's the principle of the thing, that i'm so close to something i want but something is stopping me. but "don't shit where you eat" is a proverb for a reason, i need strangers on the internet to remind me it's a bad idea so i can think more with my brain and less with my dick.
(go dialate) No. 502876
File: 1578678722928.png (486.83 KB, 850x898, BDA3D85F-84D6-4D0C-91F4-AB086F…)
>>502860Go back to data lounge.
No. 502881
>>502801thank god i don't have to deal with dudes like that, it's usually just
>oh you game? what you been playing>i list off several games>nods cool you ever play COD?every fucking time.
No. 502901
File: 1578682544153.jpeg (18.38 KB, 207x244, 8E94AD29-F7A4-4701-8E53-CA7B22…)
I just got a letter from my University saying I can’t graduate because of a ONE CREDIT lab course that I got a C- in when you need a regular C in order to get credit. I am so fucking mad, I’ve wasted so much time in college dicking around and when I finally get my shit together I have to wait an entire semester just to get one fucking credit for a core class that has nothing to do with my degree or my career path. I almost dropped out of college several times, and now that I’m here being denied like this is just soul crushing. I have another lab that I’ve passed but because I didn’t pass the course to that lab it doesn’t count. One fucking credit and I have to stall my life another 6 months. I could at least understand if I had gotten a D, but I got a 72% in that class and it’s still not good enough. I honestly feel like fucking dying right now anons.
No. 502906
File: 1578683168112.jpg (16.23 KB, 400x400, cursed.jpg)
I just can't stop thinking about coke. 10 days I'm clean. I'm this close to call my dealer. I hate this addictive expensive little bitch. I hate myself for being weak.
No. 502924
>>502906You can do it anon, you're strong, not weak. I can barely go a day without sugar.
>>502918I agree with you but I feel like this belongs in another thread
No. 502952
>>502940>his friends are a priority over me Which I could understand for some things, but assuming your date was scheduled first in advance that's incredibly rude and would make anyone feel second rate. Honestly, it is early in the dating process so you could take this as just a dumb move with no mal intent.
I would be cautious about catching any feelings for him for some time yet though. Would be a shame if you were to get emotionally invested and then discover the guy is a flake and is married to his friends.
No. 502978
>>502971The good news is that they make wigs with great quality now. If I had an excuse like balding I would just switch to wigs and never look back tbh. There's so much pressure to keep natural hair but the reality is it's a huge maintainence with typically little payoff. Wigs are so convenient, I love being able to slap one on and already have most of the hair prestyled, volumous, and near perfect. Whereas with my real hair it takes literal hours, and the style isn't even guaranteed to hold because I have frizzy curls.
If you got multiple wigs in different styles you could have a style for different outfits which is always kinda cool.
No. 502980
File: 1578695720820.jpg (40.61 KB, 500x750, hair.jpg)
>>502972my hair is a bit like this atm, so i'm able to hide it. i just worry about the first time a potential gf/bf sees me fresh outta the shower or something. just ugly ugly ugly
if it gets much worse, i'd rather go bald than wear a wig. my only saving grace is that i'm pretty gnc in presentation so i might be able to pull that off. but good god, i love my hair. i don't want to say goodbye lol
No. 503008
>>498054My boyfriend said he was looking for a new watch. I said I hadn't seen him wearing one in years but apparently he has since he started his new work. He said he didn't use it to check the time much because of his phone (understandable), but he liked the visual of it.
"So a bit like a bracelet?" I said.
I apparently should not have tried to make that tiny remark because suddenly he was very adamant that "no, a watch is just a watch and lol wtf are you on about? Is a bike also a car?" so I tried explaining to him that a wristwatch is a watch and bracelet at the same time. It's both. I also said it's not "gay" or anything since he seemed so adamant to die on a hill about how wrong I was. He made me feel like I was being so dumb over something so trivial when he was the one who sperged about it and I was just explaining. I even mentioned how I have a necklace with a functional watch. He seemed to give in eventually but by then I was so annoyed I haven't bothered texting him again yet. If I was in a gay relationship this would've never happened lol.
No. 503018
>>503010Yeah, thanks for acknowledging it's not just me finding this frustrating. If he would've just casually said "I don't feel like watches can be bracelets personally" it would've been ok, but he made me sound dumb and basically ridiculed me in chat for pointing out something that is true.
It also reminded me of how he went OFF about one of my best friends a few months back. He doesn't even know her well. The friend in question can be a bit blunt and slow in some situations which I might have mentioned to him, but she's such fun to be around and a sweetheart when you need her. She's one of my best friends for a reason. Which you'd think he'd understand. He verbally went off about her character as if she'd personally hurt him or something. It's the only time he's really shocked me. Sometimes I just feel disconnected from him because I feel like we're on completely different levels emotionally.
No. 503033
File: 1578714996250.jpg (232.77 KB, 999x1089, NOSE.jpg)
I fucking hate Gabbie Hannas potato nose.
So I shooped it to look normal
No. 503074
File: 1578729525386.jpeg (44.56 KB, 1024x576, 9DE29E78-5F04-4146-9F9E-6E4482…)
My boyfriend pointed out that I looked tired today and it honestly sent me into a downward spiral of insecurity. I'm quite underweight and as of now there isn't much I can do to change that. I think being underweight and pale makes my dark circles that much more prominent and… I don't know! I feel hideous! It doesn't matter how many times he tells me he doesn't care about looks or finds me attractive, I feel so ugly. I recently stopped wearing makeup, maybe that's why?
I know that it's immature and shallow but I can't stand not being the best that I can be and I feel as though all of my value is based on my looks. I'm not good enough.
I only feel pretty in the summer. I hate living in the UK because I hate having to dress for cold rainy weather all of the time.
I just feel so bad overall lately that I don't know how to explain it. I've been having auditory hallucinations again, even though I've been over sleeping a lot. I think I must be very ill, but I don't know what's wrong with me. I keep hearing scratches, banging, someone saying my name over and over, a woman whispering but I can figure out exactly what she's saying etc. I know it's not real. My stomach feels full yet empty at the same time, my mind feels foggy, I keep having cold sweats, feel like I need to throw up and my heart keeps randomly beating fast? I've become a total freak out of nowhere for seemingly no reason. My head hurts from overthinking. I don't know why. Ugh, anons, I've become so pathetic. I feel pathetic even putting this here. I keep overreacting to such small things.
No. 503076
>>503071also just want to acknowledge that the only reason that I am posting this is because I am extremely intoxicated. Because I feel like even people on anonymous imageboards can fucking smell how pathetic I am and I only lurk and never post because I always immediately regret the things I say and do. I hold things in constantly and I'm only posting because I have ostracized my only friend through my psychotic bullshit - I would avoid meeting up with her and being a true friend to her because I was so ashamed of who I was that I figured she would be better off not dealing with me. But sometimes I need to talk to someone but I know that is unfair (to her or anyone else in my life) because I'm not an actual multi-faceted person and am almost constantly absorbed with how much I hate myself. But this person I truly care about and wish I still had in my life, the fact I don't is also my fault.
I just don't know what to do and I know I'm not a sympathetic figure because everything I've done is a decision I've made for myself and I need to deal with that. Deep down I know that it's my fault and my responsiblity. I try to tell myself that but it doesn't make things any easier and I still want to look for a way out where I don't have to face myself or anyone in my real life and can pretend that I have the capacity to be different than I actually am. I just want to start over or kill myslef and have another chance. I don't know.
No. 503085
>>503024Spooky, switch the smart with having "potential/talent" and I could have written this myself, down to the heavy depression at 10. I passed 25 last month and it's exactly like you described. Nothing changes if you don't change. I study, but it's very hard due to the same reasons you struggle with. My only advice would be to go very, very small steps towards your goals. Don't go to school or apply for jobs before you improved your way to deal with stress and anxiety. If you are afraid or hesitant to visit a therapist, you could start with the other options to at least ease your problems until you're ready to take the next step, wether this is a therapist or something else. Personally, doing meditation, breath exercises and yoga helped me a bit to ease, deal with and prepair for anxiety. Changing my diet and picking up cycling also helped to feel at least a bit more energy. I know how fucking hard it is, but try to immediately cancel yourself and refocus on something else whenever you notice your thoughts are drifting to your past failures and shit-talking yourself. That 'something else' could be a task or goal you're dreaming of, listening to upbeat music, trying to remember stupid unimportant things or even just consuming entertainment. Literally anything that distracts you. Hey, just google a small thing in your eveeyday life you struggle with and try one (just one) of the things that are suggested solutions. Even if it sounds stupid. My point is: Doing something, no matter how small or seemingly useless it is, is better than nothing.
No. 503086
File: 1578733873788.jpg (20.65 KB, 474x346, thJZJF4MO2.jpg)
My fucking 20 year old brother just fucking screamed at my little brother WHO IS A CHILD and yelled "Shut the fuck up" at him for something with TikTok. I am sick of this he always does this kind of shit I swear to god. I'm tired.
Once I move out and am independent of this family I am cutting contact with him. Worst thing is my family gonna act like they don't know why. MOMENTS LIKE THIS ARE THE REASON!!!!
No. 503102
>>502511is there any way you could go to live in a womens shelter or anywhere that's away from this situation?
the whole story sounds so rough, you must be incredibly strong to have kept going until now
i wish you can get out of there
No. 503143
>>503140No, in fact at age 13-14 I suffered the issue of having old man mentality and criticizing and feeling bitter about everything 24-7 so Dakota and Venus was apart of that to some extent. It only cooled down until recently at age 20
I sometimes wonder how my life would've been if I wasn't a grumpy and pessimistic old man tier child lmao
No. 503146
File: 1578759598645.png (136.17 KB, 323x208, sad10.png)
Been feeling so lonely and hating myself so much lately. I tried to take my mind off from work/life stress by doing art which often calms me down, but it's not working anymore because it's also making me stressed out. Why is it so hard to make art friends in real life or even online? Is my art really that bad that other artists don't want to interact with me at all? Am I just that unlikeable irl and also online? I always try my best to engage and be friends with other artists online by commenting and reblogging all the lovely arts they created but so far it's rare for other artists to interact with me (before anyone accuses me of chasing clout with only popular artists online, no, I mostly interact with artists who only draw in a specific fandom that I'm into and most of them are not super popular artists). I just want an artfriend that's into the same fandom as me. I'm envious of other artists online who have their own close group of artfriends/groups that hangs out together online and irl. I just want to spergout and be a loser fujo together but nope! So far I can't seem to make any close artist/fandom friends. Sometimes I think I should just quit trying to make artfriends and quit social media all together and just be a lone loser weeb artist forever. Being online and friendless is just depressing.
No. 503155
>>503140I thought Dakota's older photos from when she was on Tumblr were really pretty (still do), but got bored of her after she completely changed her editing style. I also liked Venus' channel, more because of the very earliest "randum xDD but kawaii" videos.
At the same time, though, I was always reading about their fuck-ups, seeing their unedited photos and watching them get mocked, so I had no illusion of them being "perfect".
I couldn't really wear or do all of the things I wanted to back then, so I guess part of me was living vicariously through them.
No. 503159
>>503146I’ll be your art friend anon. Not really into any fandoms atm though. I don’t really have many friends who make art either.
Keep pushing forward. We have lonely and sad times so that the good times can make us really feel alive. Do your best to take care of yourself.
(I put a temporary email in the sage field if you decide you’d like to make contact.)
No. 503160
>>503146Fuck anon this is my exact feelings to a T, thanks for writing this vent on my behalf my dude. I don't understand why it's so hard to make fellow artist friends, I'm a pretty decent weeb fujo artist yet still I feel like the cringiest motherfucker trying to reach out to others like me when they dismiss me like yesterday's garbage. I used to find solace from work but now that work is extremely stressful and making me hate myself it's not working anymore.
>I'm envious of other artists online who have their own close group of artfriends/groups that hangs out together online and irl.Seeing this kind of stuff on my TL is like stab to my heart, I really miss having a weeb artfriend group like I had as a teen. wish I could've appreciated it more back then
No. 503161
>>503146>>503159>>503160Give me your twitter cowards, we friends now.
Or other social media but twitter is the one I use the most.
No. 503206
>>503190>Like what is even the point in continuing our existence if true and unconditional love isn't real???No offense but get a hobby.
Also unconditional love does exist, see: parents, the good ones at least.
No. 503229
>>503190No offense but go shout this in a male space. Women are proven time and again to be the party who stick out their partners' abuse and try to "talk it out" in
problematic relationships. Any vents you see here about farmers and their shitty bfs/husbands are just pent up frustrations from trying repeatedly to make things work. Their efforts fail because the majority of men are only looking out for themselves.
I personally haven't encountered too many relationship stories in lc where the farmer's anger wasn't completely justified.
No. 503233
File: 1578784258431.png (406.88 KB, 585x480, b8acd247-a5c8-4d5f-bf27-180813…)
I work in retail and I absolutely hate the fact that the only group of people treating me somewhat decent are middle-aged or elderly men because it interferes with my hardcore pinkpilled worldview. I get whiplash of the mind watching males act like unhinged baboons online and then get to work and get treated well by the same males I called depraved subhumans on pinkpill boards earlier that day. I just don't know what to think anymore.
No. 503265
>>503233Really? I also work in retail and old ladies (65+) love me. They've always been nice even before this job tbh.
The Karen meme is sadly true sometimes, but ladies older than that demographic? Based.
What bothers me is knowing guys irl as friends who are decent people/very good to their gfs. I have a coworker who does very sentimental and sweet things for his gf and they're very much in love (ltr too, not honeymoon) and I can't reconcile it. Not to mention male friends at school who are respectful to me and others.
Just tell yourself they're secret pedos or something, idk. It just sucks that interacting with them humanizes them.
No. 503291
>>503285Obviously they peaked along with the rest of the altright I’m just being
triggered like a dumbfuck. Russia actually experiences a significant brain drain even to this day and it doesn’t need the addition of more stupid people from America.
No. 503368
>>503342Apply for the job. If you're bad at maths, you can count the money slowly and clearly and pretend you're doing it for the customer's benefit so that they don't have to check themselves. You could also use a calculator if you need one.
Why is it that you struggled working with people? This is a bigger issue than whether or not you can drive, you should work on this first.
No. 503432
File: 1578859466447.png (174.68 KB, 354x369, 9b14f03a4716280490f8196ef75535…)
I started a winter break course through my university to finish some gen eds and graduate earlier, but couldn't go through and had to drop the class because I was really sick the day of the midterm and ended up going to the emergency room. I feel really guilty about it because my dad still has to pay (he has the money, and honestly if I were petty this wouldn't be a problem but). If I bust my ass I would've been able to graduate in two years. I took a year off too because I was majorly depressed and realized I hated college. I just want to get out as soon as I can but I feel like I just shot myself in the foot, but it's a catch-22. I couldn't reschedule the midterm, but I was super sick and couldn't even concentrate throughout the day.
Now my winter break feels super empty too, like I'm wasting time constantly. I've made my whole entire life academic work and it's kicking me in the ass when I try to relax. Even when I'm sick I feel like a waste of space because I'm not studying.
No. 503438
File: 1578862774564.png (54.39 KB, 335x371, 1551415975651.png)
Anyone here is active/dances/goes to gym?
I finally want to get myself together and start going to dance classes, yet I feel extremly insecure with my body and I know I will feel inferior to other people there. My problem starts with what clothes I should buy myself for these, since most of leggins/pants are usually too short and it looks weird (I'm 180cm). Also I need to cover my arms, because I still have acne all over them. Start working out in home? Are there sites online with workout videos? (I've tried STEEZY Studio, yet feels like irl class would be better since I am not sure if I am doing moves in a right way etc)
It all probably sounds stupid, but I finally want to get myself into it.
No. 503442
File: 1578864394711.jpg (17.15 KB, 324x324, 1543060938619.jpg)
I hate putting effort in anything. It only benefits people whose interests are against mine and there's absolutely nothing for me. I know most of us go through it but it still gets to me sometimes.
No. 503453
>>503438Adult dance classes are always going to have women who are insecure about their bodies and don't all look like skinny ballerinas. And if there are mirrors everyone will be busy staring at themselves instead of you. You can wear calf/knee length pants too.
tbh none of this is worth worrying about, don't use them as excuses. Nobody cares about you when they're busy working.
No. 503475
My boyfriend just broke up with me because I was too scared to tell my Muslim parents about him, so we never saw each other out of college. I knew it was very likely he'd want to break up so it's no surprise but fuck me. I'm just too much of a coward to tell or confront my parents about anything, not even for someone who was supposed to be "important" to me. I asked him out because I had a weird crush on him and I'm glad I did, but now I can see how many issues I have to work through and I'm just a spineless fraud. I guess l'll do what my mom said: "don't date, you need to focus on school right now"; I'll just fucking do that because it's all I fucking have. I do feel like I wasted his time and hurt him more even though he "dumped" me because he's so kind and understood my situation is stupid.
I don't know how long it will take me to finally be my own person and tell my parents I don't believe in Islam. As they grow older, they're becoming more religious and I don't know how much I'll hurt them, if they will stop speaking to me. Right now I want their financial assistance so spineless coward it is, I suppose.
In high school I hoped once I was in college things would be better, but now I'll have to wait until after I graduate from here. I've just been realizing recently I just have so much to unpack and deal with, because for so many years I just haven't thought and wasted all my time online ignoring the real world. Fuck. My parents don't know who I am and my attempt to talk to my older sister (who I have a strained relationship with) went fucking poorly because I'm stupid.
I don't have any close female friends, I gave up on having friends in high school and once again my friendships in college are somewhat superficial. My (now) ex was the one person I confided in and trusted to understand me and my stupid life. I keep going through the list of people I know and there's just no one I want to call. I don't maintain friendships, because I tell myself no one really wants to listen or cares about me. I never really told anyone in depth about him because I thought they'd judge me or some shit.
I removed him from social media and deleted our texts, next I'll delete all the pics I have of him. Even if we become friends later, I don't need that on my phone.
No. 503484
>>503475How old are you? Are you studying far away from your parents or still living with them? I feel you and I even feel like I could have typed some of this myself, my family is Muslim and I never believed in any of this. I can't trust my sisters with anything either and my parents used to beat us for pretty much anything as children. So I never even tried to get into a relationship with anyone because I was too scared of getting caught dating a guy not from my ethnicity or not muslim, especially as me and my big sister were raised very strictly. I had a hard time socializing normally in general when growing up too because I thought they'd beat the shit out of me if I so much as talked to boys my age ever since primary school so I avoided almost everyone just in case. Worst part is that they're believers but they're very moderate. I'm 25 and I feel like I'll die as a kissless, handholding-less virgin because of this shit, especially as I'm still living with them until I can finally get a stable job. Although because of my ethnicity a lot of people, especially men, avoid me because they all think I'm muslim. The only men I ever attracted were muslims.
I don't know about you but I plan on traveling for a year at least very soon, do whatever I want without being worried I'd get caught by relatives or family friends and then as soon as I go back in my country I'll look for a job at the other side of where my family lives. I also avoid social media and stay as anonymous as possible online. This requires a lot of planning though, I hope you can also move very far away from them so you can have as much privacy as possible and have good excuse to not visit as often as they could ask. At least you should focus on school so you can gtfo of here asap but try to make as many friends as possible so you won't feel as lonely and university is supposed to be good for networking in the first place.
No. 503500
File: 1578883884202.jpeg (76.33 KB, 500x534, FFEA443B-3BC4-406D-BC91-F4A699…)
I’m trying to get my boyfriend to exercise with me, but he just won’t even try. I don’t want to push him too much because in the end, it’s his body, but he’s gained so much weight the past couple of years. I hate to say it, but I’m just not as physically attracted to him this way… it’s not just the weight, it’s the lack of caring about himself. It’s the laziness of wanting instant gratification all the time instead of putting in any work to change for the better. He’s now technically obese. It’s just frustrating that he doesn’t care.
I guess I’m salty because I put so much effort into my appearance, and I feel a bit taken for granted. He loves my figure, and I want to love his. I’m not asking for a six pack, or arms of steel. Just a body that doesn’t crush me when we’re in bed together.
Ugh, I feel like I’m projecting. Sorry for the lame vent ladies. Just don’t have anyone in my life to tell these feelings to. I feel shallow. I love him very much, and he’s a very kind soul. I just wish he’d take a little more pride in his appearance like I do.
No. 503509
>>503506Legit question tho. Men always want their partners to be sympathetic for their lax looks, but they drop women like it's nothing and they aren't ashamed of it not a bit.
I just don't know why we put ourselves up to these high standards, but we accept it when men can't be assed to do the same.
No. 503514
>>503500I'm in a similar situation anon. My bf says he wants to "do better" all the time but does nothing to back it up. I have been trying very hard for the past month or so to be healthier - and I'm kind of succeeding! Especially with cutting out fast food.
Him… Not at all - like he's not even trying. I'm worried that I'll eventually become a new person without him. He's been incredibly supportive through the tough times and yes - through about a 100lbs gain due to deteriorating health (that I'm working on fixing!)
Blog post over but I feel for you anon and I hope he comes to his senses.
No. 503563
>>503556How to make your girlfriend feel special: not this
I had a male buddy who would take every girl to the exact same places, down to the exact same patch of ground in a park with a nice view. I saw one of his female friends made her cover image the view from that exact same spot a little while after he took me there. But at least he didn't mention it too…men are unoriginal.
No. 503577
>>503233>>503265>It just sucks that interacting with them humanizes them.Why do you prefer them to all be awful people? There can be exceptions to a rule or people with nuances, if you're knowingly ignoring those exceptions it makes you sound unhinged and willfully ignorant like a flat earther literally ignoring what is in front of them or a racist who unironically believes other races can't feel pain.
PP threads should make you better at spotting bullshit like when an old man is just being nice to you because you're young and hot. They're meant to be a place for debate and sharing experiences, not reverse bambi bimbo hypnosis.
No. 503582
>>503233>I work in retail and I absolutely hate the fact that the only group of people treating me somewhat decent are middle-aged or elderly men because it interferes with my hardcore pinkpilled worldview. Absolutely same, anon. I feel so guilty for thinking like this, but god, the way the vast majority of women treat me at my job…
And it's not just grannies either, while teens and young women still treat me normally, it's as if they all turn into harpies as soon as they hit 30.
In the 4 years I worked at my job I've been hit on by creeps maybe 5 times but the number of women who've treated me like absolute dirt is probably in the hundreds. I wonder why that is? Why are they like that?
In my country we have two ways of speech, one formal, one informal and most women use the former while men use the latter. But it's not like they're doing it to be polite to me, they're clearly talking down on me. Funnily enough I work at the probably trashiest store in the entire town, so it's not like my costumers are high class either lol
It just seems that most women - and especially older ones - are so incredibly bitter and stuck up. I get that they might have had a harder life than males their age, but that's no reason to treat a young female minimum wage worker badly. All of them always have such high demands, they want incredibly specific goods, nitpick what I have to offer, get angry at me about the prices and also get angry when I don't have exactly what they wanted. As if I as a worker have any control over that, go complain to my boss. Meanwhile most grandpas go out of their way to be nice to me, say they feel sorry if I have to work late and so on. They are also always content with what I sell and many of them give me tips (which is not that common in my country), even very young guys who definitely don't have much on their own as well.
I'm not pretty (especially not when I'm in my ugly work uniform and tired and sweaty as hell) but nevertheless I also got the impression that women absolutely hate whe you speak to their partner. So when there's a couple I always go out of my way to only adress her and not him, but most of the time they're still cold.
Hopefully I won't be like them when I'm older. I think a lot of these problems would be solved if everybody worked in the service industry for some time. If you experience yourself how shitty rude costumers can make you feel, then maybe you'd change your ways.
Oh and the Karen meme isn't a thing there I live, so it's not like I'm prejudiced because of that, this is just sadly my experience.
No. 503593
>>503233>>503254>>503582Same. I used to work at a fast-food kiosk and the number of entitled older women who hissed, yelled at me or were downright nasty to me was overwhelming, same about women with boyfriends or husbands.
Occasionally you'd get some neonazi junkie causing trouble (most of us were Eastern European in the store, some had very strong accents, one guy had a Jamaican dad, one was an Italian lesbian so we often got bitched at for daring to be foreign and "take jobs from honest locals", nevermind that the most common complaint about foreigners here is that we leech off the government and are lazy, but I digress), but honestly most people were nice. Women in their 30s were lovely, most teenage girls were lovely aside from a few bitchy ones, 90% of guys were neutral but nice.
But every day, as if on schedule, crotchety old women would come in droves around lunchtime and start denigrating me, complain (there is a water stain on this knife, give me another; I don't like this dish, make me another, now make it again; I want my food now, where is it?), yell at me, roll their eyes at me and just act nasty. I always speak to them first over their partners and only ever look at them, but some of them are so mean to a point where a few times their partners had to apologise to me.
It's such bullshit, I don't give a shit about your boomer husband or your personal problems, I don't get paid to get yelled at and you're not the one who signs my paychecks so piss off. I will literally forget about you as soon as the money is handed to me and I wish you a nice day. Leave me alone.
No. 503595
Finally my friend is starting to notice I’m ghosting her and I’m kind of relieved about it.
It all started a few years ago. I’ve known my best friend for 12 years now and she introduced me to this friend maybe 7 or 8 years ago. At first we all got along pretty well but after a couple of years we (my best friend and I) distanced ourselves from them just because, this happened to me with some other friendships, it’s not that deep.
Six years ago the relationship between my best friend and me was kind of messy and rough, we had some pretty nasty fights about things that doesn’t matter anymore and very hurtful things were said but we made up, ended up apologising with each other and that was it.
My friend came to me and told me some of the things my best friend said about me even when I knew it, just in case I wasn’t aware of it and that is when she told me that basically she hates my best friend. She hates the way she is and how she acts with me, or well, how she acted with me.
More or less three years ago we got pretty close again and I thought this was left behind in the past because I reminded her how important my best fiend is to me, I consider her part of my family, more than a sister than a friend. Even when I know she did some pretty messed up things in the past, heck I did it too! It’s not like I was a saint back then either.
I reminded my friend this because I couldn’t forget what she said about my bf, even if she was trying to protect me, I said to her her I don’t want her to like my best friend but I would appreciate if she could just be cordial to her because she is actually essential in my life.
One day she told me she that she was scared I would be like a 15 old again, always insecure and letting people running over me and that pissed me off SO. MUCH. It made me realise she doesn’t see me as I am, she thinks I’m someone who has to be saved no matter what and I tried so hard for years to be strong and not dependable of people, her saying this to me made me feel useless.
For months we talked and nothing else happened but one day my best friend made a mean remark about me to said friend. It was not something that important and when she told me I said to her that I was sure she would tell me later (and she did, just two weeks after). I explained to her that even when I find it immature too, my best friend is someone so impulsive she needs to vent out but not to me because she knows when she’s hurt she says things she doesn’t mean. This is something that used to stress me out but not anymore because I know she still loves me and c'mon, when we meet with other people is pretty common to talk about other friends and that doesn’t mean we hate them or that we won’t talk to them at some point. Not like the mean girls club my friend thinks we’re part of it again.
My friend started again with the same old song about how mean my best friend is because (apparently to her) I’m this creature of light who doesn’t ever make anything wrong and how I should ditch her and search for another friends. To me it was pretty obvious what she was trying to do (she’s a very lonely girl who has it hard to make friends and I feel sorry for her but it isn’t my fault) but even then I started giving her explanations and reminding her the good things my best friend has absolutely be anyone else and how I would never cut her for such these things. Even when my best friend talked with me I went to her like “see? I told you she would tell me”.
She said that she was happy we arranged things but truth is she doesn’t accept anything our friendship. Every time I mention her or I post something’s about my best friend, she completely ignores it but when I post anything (and I mean ANYTHING) else, she’s the first one to comment about it or ask me about it.
This hurt me specially because I haven’t seen my best friend for half a year (she’s studying abroad) and when I finally met her for a holiday, my other friend couldn’t be more…Mean? She didn’t even ask me how it went, nothing. I tried to explain to her some of the things we did and she completely ignored me.
She vented to me about her boyfriend and other friends (and she said some awful things too) but I never, ever judged her about her decisions and poor relationships, even when I could basically hate the scumbag she has as a boyfriend now. When I saw photos, I pretended I was happy for her even when it could have been easier for me to do nothing about it. Worst thing is my best friend doesn’t suspect anything of this and when I see that she liked some of her photos or even she ask me about her, I want to scream. I’m tired of feeling judged even when I explained to her time after time how things are. And then she’s posting all these passive aggressive photos about how we shouldn’t let people treat us bad and blahblahblah, expecting me to care? She’s the one who thinks I’m not capable of deciding which people I want in my life and why.
Tl;dr : one of my friends is being a judgemental prick just because she wants me to ditch my best friend and occupy her place.
No. 503603
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i am so tired of my tim boyfriend. i dated him a year before he transitioned and he was verbally, emotionally, and sexually abusive. i was so insecure, i was stupid and i stayed. did everything for him. always took the blame like a good girl should.
now he’s been transitioning for 4 years, and he’s physically violent and has almost killed me MANY times, choking me, shaking me, sitting on my chest, slapping, punches in the stomach. shouted that i’m a disgusting terf who needs to die in my face. this terf thing was about a year and a half ago, mind you, before when i was brainwashed and wanted nothing more than to please him and make him feel valid! i was never a fucking terf until i took the time to google it.
every special moment i had became about him and his “dysphoria”, every accomplishment i had was because i was cis and HE could do everything i did better if he was cis, if he wasn’t constantly doing everything better than me he’d REEEEEE transphobia.
i’m trying to leave, but all of my assets are in this person. everything is so tangled up— our friend groups, our belongings, our interests— and what’s worst is everyone i hang around, and all of our friends, are brainwashed into giving him asspats and if i ever said anything i’d be ousted as a transphobic witch. he’s assured me i shouldn’t speak out about these things to anyone because they’d take my side because of transphobia, and all i do is manipulate people when i have complained anyways. he’d also say the terfs would jump on my story, that my made up story that he admits happened is a terf wet dream. i have screenshots of him SAYING he raped and beat me ffs. he stoll won’t even let me try to talk and out 5 years of physical, emotional and sexual abuse with him because it makes him “dysphoric” and feel like “a man” and he’s changed so much from 3 months ago and i’m an evil terf
tracks my movement through a child trqcker phone app, he listens in on my therapist appointments and i’m afraid to delete it because he’ll know and i’ll face consequences
forced me to flirt with men on tinder and send him the images, would piss himself if i said i didn’t want to and say it’s unfair of me to not be a sexually liberated woman with him
i want my fucking life back. last time he put his hands on me, i almost fucking died, and i know next time, he will kill me. i’m fucking trapped and alone. and i can’t talk about it with family or friends or anyone because they’re ultralibs.
this sounds like a caricature of an abusive trans women and if i divulged anyone but here roves of libs would say i’m a terf fake account.
this feels endless. i feel dead inside. i’m not a human anymore. i wish i was brave but i’m afraid i never will be
No. 503606
>>503603Anon, please please please leave her. She's absolutely horrible to you. You deserve so much better. I know it's hard, but
please get away from her. If you lose 'friends' because of ending the relationship, so be it. It's better to be alone than in an
abusive relationship, or with false friends. I'm honestly worried for you. You'll be doing your future self so many favours by leaving.
No. 503610
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My only friends right now are my boyfriend and my brother-figure, and while I'm very appreciative of them, I think having a same sex friend is always nice. As to why I don't, no one in my college really 'clicks' with me and my best female friend of 6 years turned out to be a genuinely not nice person and I only stoped being her friend a couple of months ago. I lost quite a few mutual 'friends' along the way, but I'm glad about it because they weren't much better.
Honestly, I really want an older female friend. The idea of having a big sister figure, who can guide me and talk to me about girly things is so cute aaaa. I guess it sounds pretty dumb, but I'd just really like someone to talk about typical girly things with, like fashion or hair or something! I've been playing Love Live and watching typical moe anime lately, and seeing the close female friendships the girls have makes me a little jealous. I don't know. Maybe I'm romanticising things.
No. 503611
>>503605>>503603samefag
no matter how "ultra libs" your family is im sure no one is gonna put up with that shit, thats basically abuse 101 if I had a child and they were going through this no matter how liberal or whatever I will not let that shit slide, if you have physical evidence, like scars bruises etc believe me no parent will tolerate that happening to their kids. its not about being liberal or conservative its about abuse and what you're going through is called abuse and you should get out of there before you get your ass murdered by some psycho tranny
No. 503612
>>503611not samefag, just happened to see her post 3 mins after
anyways, u'd be surprised how many families dont give a shit about their kids because "they did something i told them not to do"
No. 503627
>>503603Holy fuck anon if I could I would drive to get you right away and host you for as long as you'd need to. Poor thing. Can you reach out to a woman's shelter near you? First you need to get away physically, then you absolutely have to publish the screenshots. Your friends may reject you and believe the tranny lies, but at some point they'll believe them. Maybe not right away, but in a while. You might be alone for a moment. But would you rather be alone for a short while than risk being killed by an
abusive man in a dress?
Go to your parents. Show the screenshots. They'll believe you. He has only manipulated you into thinking that you're trash and nobody will believe your "terf lies". Again, he's lying to you and you bought it, but need to snap out of it. Your parents will believe you after seeing the screenshots, I promise.
No. 503633
>>503611Can confirm, your parents beliefs will not affect how they feel about you being abused. Even the "nicest" seeming people have been shown to be the
abusive ones.
>>503603I dated a tranny a year before he transitioned and a half year into him transitioning so I know how that experience part has been, thankfully he didn't lay a hand me. I'm sorry he's doing this to you. Definitely find shelter, go to your parents and file a police report with them by your side. Delete the tracking app and anything connected to him being able to monitor you. Block him on social media, literally anything will do good. You may have to get a new phone number, but it's for your own safety. Sending all my good luck energy to you.