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No. 472051

A Thread for former NEETs who escaped the NEET lifestyle and are tying to stay out and current NEETs who wish who want to get out of NEETdom

No. 472054

I thought I hated normies (and people who I thought were normies but aren’t/weren't). Truth was that I hated loneliness not other people, and that I was causing the problems in my social life, not society. Took some steps,Thanks to the support of my parents,got a full time at a local sporting store that one my dad's friends partially owns,managed to actually socialize with other people talking about early 2000's related nostalgia,actually have a group friend now, and I can finally hold a conversation without it ending after 5 seconds. I’m a lot happier now.

No. 472071

help me anons, ill falling so deep into loneliness. i havent received my disability allowance yet i am hungry and i am scared i will die in my bed and no one will find me for days

No. 472079

do your parents or close family relatives live near you and If so can/will they help you ? and also does your disability prevent you from getting a job

No. 472170

I was neet for 5 years, in a 3-year and 2-year stretch. I've spent the majority of my adult life that way. But I have a part time job since the beginning of last month.

The biggest issues I have are with confidence and talking to coworkers. I'm not that bad at talking to them, but since I'm so avoidant, it just ends up being small talk.

A bit of advice for neets out there: I volunteered for a while before I got a job. Because I was with people at their workplace, I got to see what a normal work environment looks like with barely any pressure on me. So if you can volunteer with people who are doing normal paid work, it can be a good start. (If you have social anxiety like I do, anyway.)

No. 472178

my neet recommendation for Us anons: AmeriCorps
paid volunteering.

It's tough work but they will hire pretty much anyone, they have job postings all over the us you do pretty much only from their shitty website and over the phone interviews, it's also incredibly hard to get fired unless you like violate a human right. (I had several embarrassing neet transition panic attacks at work. was I annoying? yes? could they get rid of me? no.)

I'd never had a job before but had gone to school for a year and I felt so prepared to find work after even with no degree.

I sound like a government shill but it saved my life. Most programs are for 18-25 but they have plenty of positions for older women. It's work experience that pretty much looks as good as PeaceCorps on your resume. Sometimes they will give you extra money to move. Not great pay but you get like almost 200$ in food stamps and health insurance. (oh also you get about 5000 a year to put towards education. ultimately you are netting about 10 bucks an hour but if you have 0 work experience it's worth it. Vista positions are the tits and you get paid more but I haven't done it yet. Probably will next time I'm in a bind.

No. 472195

I've mostly been a neet since 2007. there were a few years i tried to go back to school/college but the act of physically being there was harder than any of the academic work I had to do. I'm 29 now. I have a chronic illness, depression, severe social anxiety and avoidant personality disorder. No education beyond high school, barely any work experience. I live with my parents. I don't leave the house most days. I have no friends on or offline. I hate my life and I don't know how to be better. I don't know if I'm capable of being better.

No. 472203

Sell things you own, like books or clothes in good shape. Find facebook groups in your area, or on instagram…

No. 472204

I was fully NEET from 2010 to 2014. Partial NEET from 2014 to 2016 (part time student). I've been consistently employed since 2016 but I feel like NEETing for so long completely destroyed any work ethic or career motivation all together. Thinking about having to work towards a career that I will work 30 plus years and be 1/3 of my life kills me. How do "normies" do it? Was it just instilled in them from the time they were teens so they had time to get used to it or something? I feel like the only way I would really try is if I was thrown out on the streets. Maybe it's because I never truly have supported myself? My bf makes a lot more than me so almost all the bills are paid for by him. Do I need to struggle more financially to really accept that life is essentially working until you die with a few fun things sprinkled in once in a blue moon? I feel privileged but at the same time I don't. Sure I have a roof over my head but never have much money or go anywhere. Even though I haven't technically been a NEET for a while I still feel like one.

No. 472219

It might be the way you were raised. Thinking back on the times I was full time neet is disturbing to me. I was consistently suicidal and without hope. I had stays in mental hospital. I had peers from my previous non-neet days but would never want to go out in fear of feeling like a joke. Like a child among adults. I've also been consistently employed now since 2016 and I can honestly say it is the most important aspect of my life. Without employment I am completely lost. I don't know what that says about me, or about society in general, but it's just the way it is. I just hope when my retirement comes I will feel like I've done enough to earn it, because I have terrible fears of sinking back down to feeling like a womanchild parasite.

No. 472223

I had to take several semesters of university and I didn't work during any of them. I went back to school fall of 2017 and I'll be graduating next May. I was often suicidal during my NEET times. And now that I think about it, I was using the internet to cope in unhealthy ways.

What really changed my life was working in a communal organic farm in South America. It showed me how crucial social and physical activity were to my wellbeing. I don't get the best grades but I'm looking forward to my future now for the most part. I would recommend WOOFing like I did.

No. 472242

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Don't let yourselves ever be shamed for not being part of the machine.

Strive to change the system to be beneficial to more people, do not strive to change yourself to fit a corrupt decaying system.

I know this is a long read and too scholarly for some, but it's a much needed alternative perspective on the issues that face all of us, and it's well worth the read.

No. 472246

Yeah because NEETs are doing so much good to the world by staying at home on the internet all day

No. 472247

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No. 472251

Did you actually read anything by KM or FE before memeing them? >>472246
Did you actually read through the link before posting that sarcastic line?

Rhetorical questions of course.

No. 472269

I hope it's ok to post here because I'm not actually a neet, only living similarly to one.
I go to uni but don't have any friends, not even acquaintances. My few friends from high school left a long time ago. I do have a part time job (once per week), but work my shift alone and keep the conversation with costumers at absolute minimum. I don't have any motivation to do anything, my personal hygiene is horrible, I brush my teeth only once per day, have trouble showering daily, rarely wash my hair, wear the same stuff for weeks, eat like shit and only sleep for 4 maybe 5 hours on average. I already studied for way too long because I'm too anxious to go to classes. I only have my family to talk to, if it wasn't for them I'd definitely be a neet, even fatter and would just lay in bed while on the internet 24/7.

It feels like I'm only alive but not truly living. I already wasted so many years being like this and it's only gotten worse. I felt suicidal 5 years ago but not anymore. Now I just try to not be an even bigger embarrassment, disappointment and reason to worry for my parents but I'm failing miserably. I'm already 24 and can't even look at guys, how am I ever supposed to turn into somebody who's somewhat normal when others my age are already working, building houses and getting married? I'm lagging so much behind.

No. 472274

It's not a race. Stop and smell the roses.

No. 472280

Sweet anon it's okay to feel like this. In an age where everyone is showing off on social media how awesome their lives are and how successful they are, it's totally normal to compare yourself and feel like you're not doing as good as others.

We are all going at our own pace, and that's okay. I am 28 and have only just managed to find a boyfriend after years of desperately wanting love, but all of my high school friends got married and moved out years ago. I still live with my parents. I focus on things that make me happy, like my dog. My sisters. Drawing. Like the other anon said, it's not a race.

Don't give up anon, life gets better. Do you have any hobbies you can throw yourself into? Anything you've always wanted to try?

No. 472301

>already working, building houses and getting married?
You're only 24 and you aren't a NEET at all, you actually work and many people are still studying at that age and very few are building houses or getting married. Those are long term goals, don't get ahead of yourself and waste time worrying about them. I mean, you don't even need them at all, I sure af don't wanna get married.

Work on your hygiene and daily routine first. There are lots of subreddits that help with forming good habits (/r/selfimprovement, /r/productivity etc) and I see a lot of posts from people with similar issues that resolve them with to do lists and tracking systems and such.

No. 472308

you can get better all of us here were just like you,I started my job when I was 26 and I don't regret it

I know it can seem difficult but a job really is better then going to school in terms of learning normie socialization(namefagging)

No. 472315

Not technically a neet because i do some remote work online, is not even regular, i might work for a month and not work for the next one but i do pay the bills with what little i make. Its just enough to survive in squalor ion my third world dump.

I lost all hope, i am very much a hikikomori, i had two jobs and hated them so much, i never want to go back to an office again, i even hate the work i already do, i hate dealing with people, i have not had a friend in like 5 years, those i did have were few and shitty and i was always the odd excluded one from the groups, i ended either being ghosted or ghosting people. 5 years ago was about the time i ended school which i also hated, i was bullied in highschool and didn't got along with anyone in uni. I have not even had a single conversation in the flesh with anyone for years. I browse ib regularly and listen to a lot of audiobooks and TTC classes to keep my sanity but i know theres nothing i am living for, i am going nowhere, i have no ambitions anymore, i dropped all my dreams and aspirations, even if i had them still at my age is already over, once my father dies i am ending my life most likely, i haven´t already because i worry about him and i pay for everything here in the shithole i live in. Everyone who abused me and bullied me is super successful now and living their dreams traveling the world, i don't even have social media because i am the butt of all jokes and have no one to talk to, i am still very much a poorfag autist looser that i was in HS, even when i tried and tried and sacrificed all my youth to try to escape , i cannot really run away from fate, i can't even afford therapy, i needed it since i was very young but i grew up a neglected poorfag from a one parent home with no friends and family to care for me so i never even had a chance but being the mockery of every context i was a part of.

No. 472316

Thread Theme

No. 472321

i was thinking on this one

No. 472327

but we never had the good life and thus we really can't go "back"

No. 472329

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I guess thats true. I have been miserable for a long time but i did have a lot more motivation and a willingness to believe things can change and my efforts can have purpose and meaning when i was younger, even when my reality was bleak. Thats a good life relative to just knowing theres nothing but the future void and bad memories from the past.

No. 472339

I talked with my dad yesterday about all my insecurities and the "what If's" I should have taken in life

he then opened up to me and told me about how when my mother was pregnant with my older sister he was in special forces training at that time and he was half way though when he got a call of how my mother's physical and mental was deteriorating and regrettably he dropped out of SF training course to be with his pregnant wife and he was labelled as a coward and quitter by his other friends,he told me that for a long he had always wondered about "what If" he stayed and how much cred it would have given in but after a while he realized that the was the decision he made and he can't change that but he can always change what direction his life is headed as long he was still alive and that I can too

I don't wanna give up

No. 472342

Your dad is awesome and it was the manliest, bravest thing to have dropped out of doing something he enjoyed to do the right thing instead. It would have been more cowardly to have ignored his responsibilities with his pregnant wife (your mom) imo, looking after a pregnant woman and then raising a baby is NOT easy. Good on him for sharing that with you. If he's anything like my dad it must have meant a lot to put his feelings out there like that. He's a good 'un. I hope you focus on the present and not the past anon. Enjoy the now, you only live once after all.

No. 472345

>Your dad is awesome and it was the manliest, bravest thing to have dropped out of doing something he enjoyed to do the right thing instead

I'll tell him that because he was shit on a lot bu his own family for quitting the SF course,even his own father (an ex-marine) called him a sissy for leaving

No. 472347

Special forces training sounds a lot more appealing than looking after a pregnant lady who is experiencing incredible discomfort and hormonal mood swings. And a newborn baby???? At least in special forces your dad would get more than 3 hours sleep a night. He's brave and did the right thing and all the others calling him a sissy were probs just acting out of toxic masculinity. Your dad sounds great and I hope you tell him that!

No. 472349

I do love him very much but I also somewhat resent him,I feel he babied me and my siblings too much and because of that we never developed in to real adults who could take care of ourselves because he already did everything for us

No. 472356

No. 472361

Nah don’t blame your dad for that shit. Yes he might have babied you but you’re now your own person. You’re an adult. You’re responsible for your actions and development.

No. 472372

he himself admitted that he babied me too much

No. 472379

What happened happened OP, at least your dad is patient with you while admitting a fault. Some parents aren't like that and like the other anon said, you're an adult now and responsible for your actions and development. It's in your power to make the change you want even if it may take a little longer. We all start somewhere.

No. 472387

Hey anon, at least you had a dad that actually wanted to be involved in his family and child's lives to the point of scarifying his career prospects/opening himself up to ridicule, he's one of the very few and you have a great asset in your possession! As >>472361 and >>472379 said, it is all in the past now and now you are your own person, take away the good things your dad/family taught you and use them to come into your own being. So what if you were babied and, let's say, had a longer childhood than most, if he did do everything for you as you said, you should have a very good template in life what to do or, at the very least, someone you can ask for guidance when encountering new obstacles!

No. 472393

I do love him but I feel I just don't deserve all he does for me,Like he deserves a daughter a parent can be proud of not a loser like me

I want him to be proud of an actual accomplishment not a pity "you did your best and that's all that matters" I want him to truly be proud of me

No. 472395

While he sounds like a decent enough person not to resent you for your "success" in life, use that feeling of wanting to do him proud as a fuel to better yourself and your life! It is better to fail trying than not try at all, and if you preserve and keep trying, one of those times it (whatever that may be) will work out! I know failure is very discouraging but you can't entirely avoid it, what you can avoid however is sulking and dropping your efforts when it does. And your dad will get the bragging rights!
Blogposting just a bit so I don't seem like a positive ig quote account kek, but like I used to be a straight A student in school but now am struggling to keep up at uni, to the point of prolonging my degree by 2 years, as I never developed any proper learning skills (which goes really badly with my high expectations of being good straight out the gate kek), but I know I'm just developing those skills later than others and yes, it may suck now, but it will be worth it in the end once I graduate with a decent honours and my mom will be able to rub it in all of her friends faces lol.

No. 472397

what really can I accomplish,I'm a ex-NEET who works full time at a sporting goods store and still live with my parents
My life is much better and happier then it was a year ago(when I was a NEET) but I'm still kinda of a loser

No. 472403

Maybe I voiced it weirdly but getting married etc isn't even my personal goal, others doing these things just highlights how far behind I am and it also makes me lose hope that I will ever lead a normal life.
How could I find friends when I lack any social skills? I'm completely stunted in this regard meanwhile everybody else already has their set group of friends for years. And how could I find a partner when my idea of a relationship is that of a 16-year-old? Normal people at this age already think about marriage (or just want to fuck around) so how will I ever be able to find somebody who's sweet enough to take things this slow with a mid 20s woman? If I were to tell a guy that I haven't even kissed anybody and am scared of intimacy he'd rightfully be weirded out (or think I was abused).

No. 472404

Hey, baby steps, anon! It is already really good that you've improved your life so much in comparison to a year ago, I'm sure your dad is happy you're out of the worst slumps and onto a normie track now! Also I'm not sure how old you are but honestly there's no shame living with your parents if you must, plus you save money! Once you feel adjusted and stable in your current situation, maybe try thinking about what you want to do long-term (not that there's anything wrong if retail is your end goal you know, can always have shit going on on the side!), what steps you could take towards it education or otherwise. Working full-time can be really constricting depending on your shifts, but you can save money for whatever it is you want to pursue eventually and then possibly reduce your hours if you feel like you can't pile stuff on top of working full-time.

Or maybe try exploring new hobbies if you are at a loss for what you're into! You said you're into early 2000s nostalgia, any ideas how to build off of that maybe? Art/music/clothing you could develop or something? If you want to gain more confidence socialising first, maybe try looking around for volunteering opportunities, that's a good way to find other kinda-younger people when not in education with 0 commitment of seeing them ever again in case you feel like you flopped severely kek.

No. 472411

with regards to social skills you gotta start slow,I was so nervous when I first started working so I was pretty much a loner but by chance I started small conversations with some of co-workers who were all near my age range about MCU films and other normie stuff I knew about over time you start building up small social skills and developing the ability to talk to people

with regards to Dating and relationships I'm just as clueless about that as you are

No. 472461


I'm in a kinda similar situation anon. I have nothing to add to the other anons but know you're not alone. If you ever wanna talk hmu with your discord tag or something

No. 472482

i was a neet for 2 years after i dropped out of college due to depression. i spent all my time playing tf2 and trading hats and getting into stupid e-relationships with toxic manchildren. then my mom tried to force me to get a job by turning off the internet, so i looked and finally found something but i quit a week later due to having panic attacks when they asked me to answer the phone.
its been about 3 years now and i have a full-time job in IT…still have no friends and i haven't left my house for a social outing in nearly a year but at least i have my own place, a job, food, and money to spend. good luck anons.

No. 472484

I'm a recovering neet (employed for a year) who lives with her mom. I feel that it makes dating tough, I was thinking about making a bumble profile but I am worried that alot of guys on there will think I'm pathetic. I also don't have anyone to take good pictures of me…

No. 472505

well I have some friends but my I don't earn enough to afford my own place so I live with my parents and the money I do make I spend on dumb weeb shit and vidya games

No. 472513

No need to go in depth about your living situation until you get kinda serious, at which point if the guy finds that a deal breaker, bullet dodged and no big loss. For dates and such, you can do activities outside or go over to his.
And invest in a tripod! Maybe check out Ashley bestdressed on either yt or ig, near all her photos are tripod based and you can see what tricks she uses! (not her or an ad, just thought it was cool when I realised that lol)

No. 472527

thank you for this anon. i've only read a bit so far but it really resonates with me.

No. 472538

Thank you. I'm feeling encouraged and gonna take a look at her pics. It's difficult to fight the nagging voice in my head that says this stuff isnt meant for me, but I'm gonna try

No. 472549

I work from home doing software development and make decent money, but in every other way I am a NEET. No friends. No human communication at all outside of work. I live with my mom. I feel incredibly out of place in every social situation both online and off, and I always have. All I do besides work is play single player video games and sleep.

My family thinks I'm doing good and that I've defeated my lifelong dysfunction because I have a good job, but I really haven't. I just found the one job that I can hold while not doing anything to fix it.

No. 472585

I hope it's ok to post. I'm a TA and I'm doing my PhD which sounds like non-NEET material but I still live with my mum and I don't have any contact with people other than the six hours I spend a week with students.
I used to be a lot worse, when I moved out for my master's I could go for weeks without talking to anybody. Before that I was full on catatonic on psych meds. I didn't leave my bed for months.
I'm making progress but I feel like I'm still so weird and out of touch. I'm like five years behind my peers at 27. It's like people can smell my old NEET ways on me. I didn't used to mind being isolated but social media makes it worse.

No. 472604

Exactly, just try! Finding out it isn't for you >>>>>>>>>>>>>> not even giving it a fair shot and writing yourself off anyway.
Checked just to make sure I wasn't being misleading but she literally has a video titled "how I take instagram pics by myself", frankly was quite eye opening haha, thought all the ig girls employ their friends/boyfriends for picture taking.

Social media does make it worse doesn't it? Irl I pass for a normie quite well but when going on fb I literally feel like a lizard person in a very ill-fitting flesh suit, how do people just up and update their fb with the most inane shit for all the people from elementary school onwards to see is beyond me kek. Since you're a TA, maybe there are younger teachers or other TAs you can strike a convo with? Just some bland colleague stuff about how weather is getting colder and work sucks etc? Maybe watch a recent movie, like Joker and ask if they've seen it and what did they think? People love being asked about their thoughts and onions!

No. 472673

Thank you anon :) I wish there were more people my age here, though they'd probably think I was a loser too. I'm the youngest in the department by 25 years and the lowest ranking, so my colleagues don't really have time for me unless they're asking me to do something for them. I tried bonding with a sympathetic older guy in my department but he's gone chilly and I don't know why. Another one I thought we had some common ground in that we both have and love dogs, but he's been avoiding me. Maybe because he finds it awkward to talk to me. To be fair I panic so much when chatting that I say stupid things and don't make sense sometimes so I don't blame him.
I've started taking up extracurricular training in an attempt to meet others in other departments, but they've already grouped up and bonded with people in their own. We had group work and I was the only one who didn't have somebody to work with so I had to talk to the guy running the group.
High school all over again, man. I'm less discouraged by these things than I once was, but making future plans to move out and escape pseudo-neetdom seem so pointless because it's not worth making the effort if it's just for me. I feel so worthless haha I don't know where to go or how to get there. Sorry to ramble, it's just weighing heavily right now. I was on the verge of losing it last week but I'm trying to pull it back around.
Sorry to hear you struggle with social media too. You're right, it's mad how people can be so comfortable being open to so many people without fear. Is that what self esteem looks like? Just like… Being really publicly comfy with yourself?
That, and all the posts from people getting houses and getting married and having kids, really can be a punch in the gut.

No. 472702

Did you have friends before? Maybe you should try reconnecting with them.

Posting on social media isn't always a sign of self esteem. A lot of times people do it because they are insecure. I'm not really sure why you are so hung up over social media. Nobody cares if you post or not.

No. 472710

Sorry to hear about it not working out with the other teachers! I think it is kinda random luck when it comes to forming friendships with people much more senior than you, sometimes it works and it is so cool an other times it feels like you're 12 years old and trying to make small talk with your mom's colleague at a grocery store lol. Older men are easier to talk to in some aspects bc they either like younger women paying attention to them (and in their eyes all young women are 10/10) or they see you as their daughter/granddaughter, but their sympathies can kinda wax and vane as a result, older women are more stable in their sympathies I've observed (work with round 20 50+ folk).
Wrt your peers, honesty just try infiltrating their little extracurricular groups, may be awkward as fuck but like what do you have to lose, right? Talking to the dude running the thing is also good tho, I'd probably just clam up and go semi mute in your place, I usually fare well in academic group work settings but failing to find a partner is still so disorienting and alienating.

It definitely isn't pointless! For one, living on your own/own means is weirdly satisfying and really makes you feel like you did something kek, plus it could give you some confidence in being on the "right track" in life and thus give you more confidence overall! I still kinda rely on using other people as motivation (mostly just not dissapointing my mom kek), but my biggest motivation right now is that I don't want the rest of my life to be like this, my highschool was like this, uni rn has been like this, it is absolutely unbearable and I don't want the rest of my life continue the same way. Even if it possibly doesn't seem like it, it can always get worse and it would be a waste if it did, think about the progress/good things that have have happened in the last year or months, and focus on that. You're doing a PhD! Like how impressive is that! Go for a walk, have a nice lunch, listen to cringy music you like (Naruto ops always do it for me) etc etc, just regroup and keep on keeping on lol

God the marriage posts are the worst! Literally, earnestly and honestly do not want to get married but seeing my best friend from secondary school get married last month was some proper twilight zone shit, really makes you feel like a baby lagging 12 developmental milestones behind huh.

No. 472713

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I dropped out of hs 6 years ago because I was being molested and ever since I became a neet. This year I enrolled into community college though all my classes are online since I did it at the last minute. I'm mentally stunted, but I am glad I chose to break the cycle this year. I am becoming afraid of staying at home as I was raped by my own family member. It's not like I like being at home doing nothing. I feel terrible being alive, yet I want to work to be away from thinking about me. I'm so afraid of everything.

No. 472722

Anyone feel like they should be working but at the same time feel it's such bullshit to give your very life and body away to businesses who don't give a shit about you? Everyone who works full time looks so beaten down, so dead, so lifeless. They don't even have a choice. I feel like there has to be a better way.

No. 472733

tfw I relate to incel rhetoric about being socially isolated forever and inherently doomed to failure except I'm slightly less retarded than incels so I know that all my issues are fixable I only have myself to blame but this knowledge actually makes it hurt more

No. 472751

I've been a NEET most of my life.

>parents never put me in school for religious reasons, "homeschooled" us but didn't actually school us beyond basic reading/writing and some math, didn't socialize us or teach us anything valuable, are also hoarders

>parents try to randomly put me in highschool, I fail bc it's too hard for me not understanding any of the work and having crippling social anxiety
>get my GED at 19
>get my first job at 21
>take some college classes, fail most of them
>quit job after 2.5 years bc they were treating me like donkey shit and overworking me to the point I couldn't get schoolwork done
>dad wants me to get a degree but is also mad at me for quitting my job (pick one asshole)
>fail class anyway
>don't work for 9 months (tried to find a new job but no one would hire me)
>no references, hardly any experience, no skills, no education (besides GED), no social skills
>finally got a job at the beginning of august, but it was temporary and ended
>trying to get a job again, no luck
>no room in my house for anything bc of parents hoarding, serious mold problem in closet in my bedroom, can't sleep bc I have to keep my window uncovered (otherwise my room fills up with mold smell) so sunlight keeps me awake
>also parents are fucking loud 24/7, mom literally watches TV 24/7 can hear it from my room
>no shower, have to go to the gym to shower which is a pain in the ass, which makes keeping up hygiene hard, which effects my ability to keep a job
>dad continues to grill me for not having a job, but also wants me to get a degree, despite having done nothing my entire life that would help me accomplish either of those things (and still to this day does nothing that would help me, like fixing our shower or getting rid of the mold)
>no friends either, friendships are way too hard to manage for me

I'm pretty sure I'll be a NEET for the rest of my life. even if I do get a job it won't be enough to support me without living with my parents. I'm too dumb for university too. I'm seeing a therapist right now but it hasn't helped much.

No. 472760

you have to move out anon!!! your parents are toxic and will never let you go anywhere in life,also considering you've had a number of jobs and education you are a way above a average NEET

No. 472767

I know and I really wanna move out, but I don't know how I'll ever do that bc I don't know how to get a job that will make me enough money to do that. my therapist keeps trying to get me to pursue a trade and I don't know if that's what I really want, but at this point it might be my only choice pretty much. I also feel this weird dependency on my parents? like even though I resent them and they're holding me back I feel like I need them.

I'm also too fugly for a sugar daddy so that's not an option for me either lol

No. 472793

I'd love to be NEET with a master wtf

No. 472833

I graduated last year and haven't found a job in that time, though I've never worked before either. I did get diagnosed with autism since, which explains a lot of my issues including bad anxiety, but the psychiatrist who said he'd refer me to people who can help with applying to jobs and group therapy for anxiety basically ghosted me. So I have to figure things out alone.

I draw well enough to appeal to some people and I make jewellery I've gotten compliments on, so I'm working on starting an etsy shop. I'm genuinely excited about it and the idea of gaining some skills through it (plus a bit of money, hopefully), but I can't help but feel guilty. I feel like I'm taking the easy way out, like Phoebe Tickner running her shitty "business", or Holly Brown starting new dumb ventures all the time so she can avoid working a real job. I feel selfish and lazy, and my mom has outright called me those things.

No. 472844

File: 1571139347934.jpeg (72.17 KB, 512x444, 1557387524830.jpeg)

For everyone in this thread

No. 473175

Struggling ex-NEET here. I was a NEET for 3 years and finally broke free into semi-functioning-normie-hood a year ago. I work a 9-to-5 job which I enjoy, I like the people I work with and I'm generally good at convincing people I wasn't a total hermit weirdo for years of my life. But still, every weekend that rolls by, unless I have something social to do with my time, I revert back into the disgusting basement dweller I used to be: I'll sit watching netflix in my pajamas for two days straight eating crap, chain smoking, drinking and avoiding all human interaction. I guess 'normies' do that too sometimes but as I don't have many friends this is generally the majority of my weekends. As soon as Monday morning comes around it becomes a real struggle to get up. I contemplate calling in sick, or just quitting cold-turkey and reverting back to my old NEET lifestyle. It was the most boring 3 years of my life, and I dread every weekend I'm on my own, but I can't seem to snap out of it. I called in sick yesterday because for once I genuinely was, and today getting up was almost impossible, I got up with 10 minutes to spare before I needed to leave the house.

I hate how much of a struggle it is to do normal shit. I keep reminding myself I was bored out of my mind and I cannot afford anymore gaps in my resume, but I'm starting to look for reasons to quit my job and/or jump in front of a bus. I've gained 10lbs in the past month and I haven't been out with my friends since late August. Does it get any easier?

No. 473237

Sounds like you have untreated depression.

No. 473245

I unfortunately don't have any advice for you but just wanted to say that I was in the exact same boat as you but instead of going back to work I did quit cold turkey and went back to being a full-time NEET and it fucked my life up quite a bit. Hope you can hang in there, I'm sure it does get better with time as long as you keep going and don't give up like my retarded ass.

No. 473255

does anyone here have ex-Neet Success stories so that I can get motivated/Inspired ?

No. 473284

Be your own inspiration

No. 473329

motivation's gonna get you nowhere, build discipline.

No. 473331

File: 1571214291010.jpg (98.17 KB, 750x744, b4t68rawblh21.jpg)

So here's my .02 blog post.

I've never had or wanted a job beyond a few retail part time stints in high school. That was enough for me to realize that it's impossible for me to be happy in traditional employment.

I do about one freelance gig per month, which is enough to sustain my lifestyle traveling around the world and pursuing my creative hobbies.

I am "poor" by Western standards, a bit scruffy and maybe I eat a lot of rice instead of restaurants, but I am free. I don't have any demands on my time or emotional labor. I don't have to spend my time interacting with coworkers or staring at a computer screen generating money for someone else.

If you actually have motivation, goals, and the brains to scheme to achieve a lifestyle for yourself, being out of education, employment, or training is actually a blessing.

If your only hobby is watching Netflix, then of course you're depressed and squandering the gift of life and the human potential.

The difference between NEETs, entrepreneurs, and artists is all about mindset.

If there's a will, there's a way.

No. 473337

That sounds great but… you know successful freelancing is harder than getting a regular job for most people, right? It's not like you're addressing a bunch of skilled, motivated people who just don't realize they can make a livable wage working once a month and travel the rest of the time. That's a dream come true by most people's standards, not a first step for people who can't get a regular job.

No. 473369

I'm pretty sure the vast majority of us just want stable employment,a group of small friends that have similar niche hobbies as us and a Understanding nice SO

I don't wanna travel the world and be entrepreneur/freelancer I just want to be a normie

No. 473385

you don't have any motivations or goals either, you're just scrounging for money and trying to brag to strangers about how amazing your life is and how "free" you are when you didn't mention anything about a long term plan. you sound like a naive camgirl.

No. 473459

Do you live with your parents? What kind of 'gig' can you do once a month that would pay for rent, utilities, insurance, and travel?

No. 473500

Thanks anon. I'm sorry things went to shit for you. Best of luck getting back on track.

I mean I do for sure, I can't afford therapy and my doctor won't change my meds even though they don't help, he just ups and lowers the dose every few weeks. I feel like depression is kind of an entry-level requirement for being dumb enough to become a NEET.

No. 473506

At the very least it seems like they have things they're passionate about. Hell people can even be passionate about watching shows on netflix or whatever but really most NEETs are just killing time instead of doing the things they enjoy, which is why they hate it so much. Of course there's the money aspect but the truth of the matter is NEETs hate being by themselves, and don't have anything they enjoy. Why would they toil looking for work or friends if they are, at a baseline, not even happy?

Nobody truly enjoys wage slaving unless it's their dream job, I'd rather be like that anon instead of having to go to 9-5 every day

No. 473508


you speak like someone who has a seminar ticket and used car to sell.

No. 473509

Totally agree. Or she is a camgirl.

No. 473510

>Why would they toil looking for work or friends if they are, at a baseline, not even happy?
I can only speak from my experience, but my main driving force for escaping neetdom was because I wasn't living up to societal expectations. I very much preferred my own company (still do) and I definitely pursued my own interests and hobbies. However I was completely beside myself with guilt for my lifestyle while others would work and suffer.

No. 473514

who said anything about friends, them talking about being "poor" and then going on to try to brag to us when they have no back up plans or long term goals has nothing to do with friendship. do they have a car or house or health insurance? what about savings? all anon mentioned was some instant gratification holier-than-thou shit.

No. 473522

This is why modern capitalism sucks and should be replaced by a better system. What place does the money-making system have for people like you?
After you've been exploited sexually, you either get to literally pay for being traumatized by going to expensive therapy just in order to earn a living (read: buy products and contribute to the economy), or you remain a social pariah.
It just adds financial exploitation and labour exploitation to sexual exploitation.

No. 473523

No. 473525

Yes, wanting to improve the situation of someone being sexually assaulted by a family member is such a meme! Ha, ha… ha…

No. 473528

nta but i don't think capitalism has any affect on anon's situation.

No. 473532

idk, anon is living a very unsustainable and tumultuous life, i'd really rather not. stability>>>>>>>>

No. 473533

Are you for real?
The social system you live in is crucial for your entire course of life, big and small things included.
But don't listen to me, just imagine how different your life would be 100, 200, 1000 years ago. Or move to Saudi Arabia or China or something.
I still can't believe you're for real.

No. 473536

so are you advocating capitalism or? you sound extremely uneducated.

No. 473542

this reeks of cope

No. 473548

To answer your question:
I advocate we move on to something better than capitalism. Something that is less economy-oriented and more centered on people and the environment. We CAN do better than this.

To respond to your insult:
I've read the works of Marx, Engels, Trotsky… I've also read Adam Smith, Kaynes, Kotler… have you? You should.

No. 473558

Good luck hoping for a new economy to pop out of thin air lmao

No. 473559

again, uneducated.

No. 473565


To what are you defeatist and rude? To the idea of giving a sexually abused victim a better environment.


No. 473567

You sound autistic. People like you also sound like religious nutters.

No. 473568

Um, why are you insulting me? Which buttons did I push exactly?

No. 473569

How am I insulting you?

No. 473571

Would your ever have the ovaries to say what you said to me to a stranger IRL?

No. 473572

get the fuck off the site you autist newfag lmfao. you sound like cows who cry about everyone being cowardly anons.

No. 473578

Yeah I would you autist. Go be triggered somewhere else.

No. 473588

I literally can't believe I'm getting juvenile insults on a forum filled with women for criticising the way incest sexual abuse victims are treated and suggesting we can do better.
What the actual fuck.

No. 473591

stop trying to rope the poor anon into your agenda. no one gives a fuck about what you're saying regardless of the subject. just accept it.

No. 473596


Communism is what condemned me to neetdom, you really don't know what a lack of opportunities and state enforced stagnation and oppression does to people and to mass psychology.

But not like it matters, obviously neet threads attract that kind of sperging and i guess some just want magical utopian faeries to swoop in with the gibs, but it would be best to keep it about our individual experiences rather than for political zealoting. It doesn't even matter where you live or your income, there's all sorts of people going trough neetdom for different reasons.

No. 473597

Even though I do think you're a sperg anon don't worry about it. The farmers replying to you trying to set you up for a drag are just as cringy as you are. A lot of the farmers here unironically suffer from personality disorders.

No. 473601

stop. you're sperging enough in the other thread as it is. leave if you don't like the company you keep.

No. 473604

I'm literally the only one staying on the subject by criticising the system that gave birth to the concept of Neetdom.

Communism is not the only alternative to capitalism.

No. 473606

i've been on this site since it was created newfag. just because half of you are spergs doesn't mean all of you are

No. 473615

Have fun believing in your economic system which doesn't exist. It's like a magic sky fairy.

Your mom suffers from a personality disorder

You definitely seem like you have autism now

No. 473622

>Have fun believing in your economic system which doesn't exist. It's like a magic sky fairy.
You-hoo-hoo-hoo may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one…
Planes, computers, free negroes and working women, all thought to be impossible once.
But we did the impossible. And we'll do it again.

No. 473631

just get a job

No. 473634

What kind of a retort is that?

Just ride a carriage instead of a plane. Just write and calculate by hand and communicate by post. Just serve you white master / husband instead of being independent.

Just don't question the status quo.

No. 473635

>the system that gave birth to the concept of Neetdom
if you were a neet in Soviet union, you were literally useless scum lower than the low wtf kek. you should hear how my grandparents speak of anyone unemployed longer for like 3 months lol, and they're the kind who still somehow manage to romanticize Soviet times. commies from countries with no commie regime past are fucking incredible. go read your dreamy literature some more and stop roping the child abuse anon into your arguments. someone forgot the whole "from each according to his ability, to each according to his needs" mantra kek (which was a code for "go work 50hr/week in a concrete factory unless you're missing more than 2 appendages" btw).

No. 473636

I am >>473331 OP.

I posted here because people want to boohoo about -society- and capitalism, when really the problem is themselves, and the course of actions they are taking with their one precious life on earth.

You can rage against the machine all you want, but you have to operate within the framework of the life you are given.

Nope lol, not a camgirl, I work as a freelance video editor.


Cost of living in Asia and
South America is much lower than the US. My only expenses are rent (300 USD) and food, which is as cheap as you want it to be. Cooking is fun.


I have tons of goals and plans in life that I'm actively pursuing, I'm just not going to blog post them because no1curr.

"A car or house or health insurance" aren't essential for life, it's only necessary if you design your life around the need of those things.

In fact, you can have more savings if you aren't obligated by these possessions.


Valuing stability over adventure or freedom is totally valid dude. If it is your path to happiness, I wish you the best.

No. 473638

>Have several licenses
>Apply to have 300 jobs a week
>Have resume evaluated by experts
>Still no call or emails back, some places even require me to take up to several hours to finish their application but ignore my application when I complete it
>The only interview I have is a shitty fast food manager job and it's not glamorous, what I went to college for, or even what I want but it will do until I move to a new city next year

No. 473639

I'm from what used to be Yugoslavia. I'm also an oldfag. We thrived during communism, and I'll admit being nostalgic for it.

Communism didn't crumble because it was a bad system, but because we lost the Cold War. And by we, I mean Slavs. They tore all our lands into smaller, less threatening pieces. Since the victor writes the history, communism=bad, capitalism=good.

But that's not the truth, just propaganda. Truth is, both systems are flawed, and both have good sides. If people were not so irrational and confrontational, we'd easily nice away from these labels to forge something better than both.

No. 473640


But Yugoslavia was the only one in the commie block that had anything resembling a market economy and free market competition though. It wasn't the marxism that made You guys more successful than other neighbors in the axis who idn't escape the collectivization policies of Moscu, and what made Yugoslavian model different was the also git it antagonized by the soviets with purges , assasination attempts and all the works for not being commie enough.

This have gotten to off topic though.

No. 473643

>the victor writes the history
Both the US and Russia won WWII, yet while the western part of Germany flourished, the people in the communist east were living in poverty and under constant surveillance. It's quite clear what works and what doesn't, one victor managed to nurse the loser back to one of the most successful countries on this planet, but the other only continued oppressing them, slowly but steadily ruining every last bit of economical strength they had left.

No. 473646

Why is then Kenya not as successful as the US or Germany, after all they're all capitalist countries? Why is commie China more successful than capitalist Kenya? Come on dude.

>market economy and free market competition
No, we didn't. I remember the opening of the market came as a shock to me. We were not an exception nor anomaly. We were proof it can work.

No. 473652

I got out of NEETdom by becoming a security officer. I got my boyfriend to become one as well. We couldn't take the manual labor jobs that paid like shit anymore, it tore us down. Too much demand, and we came home burnt out. Both of us would be unemployed for a few months in between jobs because of how much was expected out of us. Now we just are paid to watch cameras, drive a patrol vehicle around for a couple miles, and tell people where they need to go.
It feels good to have some energy when you're out of work. Seriously, definitely apply to see if you'd like it. My only advice is to avoid any hospital positions.
During training, you'll notice a lot of people in the field are former NEETs as well and then there's a couple of people who think they can be cops or are former cops, but they go off and do their own thing and are usually at armed sites, completely optional training but you do get paid more if you're into that.
Rarely do I have to work with another officer near me at all times, if someone gets too annoying, I usually just walk away and patrol somewhere else. The best part is I'm essentially still doing my job. As long as you're clocked in and your presence is known, you're good. You get to take breaks on your own time, too.
I am a soft spoken, socially anxious person, but this job really doesn't require much. Just do your patrols, which mainly requires walking, sitting, and observing. If anything bad happens, you're advised to just go ahead and call 911 instead of being the "hero".
I get paid $13 an hour doing this shit, unarmed, where minimum wage is just above $8. It's so freeing, anons. 4 years doing this common sense shit and I'm almost eligible to apply for higher paying positions, like field supervisor, where all you're doing is driving site to site and checking up on if they need anything, like office supplies, car stuff, uniforms. You're basically just going around collecting info to relay to the main office. I am pretty sure they get paid $18+ for this.
I love it.

No. 473663

>he was the only leader in Joseph Stalin's time to leave Cominform and begin with his country's own socialist program, which contained elements of market socialism.
>Economists active in the former Yugoslavia, including Czech-born Jaroslav Vanek and Croat-born Branko Horvat, promoted a model of market socialism that was dubbed the Illyrian model.
> Firms were socially owned by their employees and structured on workers' self-management; they competed in open and free markets.


i can smell the larp

No. 473672

File: 1571271820478.jpeg (79.54 KB, 1000x1000, 31ADC27E-4DC0-4674-9F33-4C7CFC…)

I just don’t think I’m made out to survive in the American economy. They require too much extroversion and aggressive personality and workaholic values… I’ve had such terrible experience with 9 to 5 employment.
I’m daydreaming about going back to live in my third world country to teach English and do niche otaku crafts to get by. My family is neither poor or rich by third world standard so I wouldn’t struggle to eat or anything. Local tourism is cheap and there’s always fresh sea food. I want to just live with some very close female friends and we can go to the beach whenever we want.
My family would never allow this of course, unless it is to marry some chauvinist salary man.

No. 473687

Because you can't compare any african country to a european one, they have completely different conditions to begin with. Germany is the perfect proof, you're just too blind to see (or too proud to admit you're wrong): same country, same people, yet completely different outcome.
Also, your definition of "successful" probably defers from ours: China itself might be rich, but nevertheless there are still millions living in extreme poverty. Not even taking into account factors like their pretty much non-existent happiness… Money isn't everything, quality of life is also essential.
I also don't like the US, but people unironically shilling communism in 2019 are either trolling or absolutely braindead.
Take off the rose-tinted glasses.

No. 473709


As someone who’s also been ghosted by psychiatrists, knock that fuckers door down. Figure out where they went (one of mine up and retired out of the blue and left the country lol). Figure out a new psychiatrist if you can, otherwise call every other social service out there to find the resources that psychiatrist said was out there.

Having an Etsy, being creative, and self employment sounds lovely but get your health together before anything imo.

No. 473734

I'm 25 and have been a neet the majority of my adult life. I even did independent studies to get out of going to highschool. I became a mom at 22 but never worked a real job before that. I have 2 children and my partner provides everything. I could honestly be a NEET forever as long as our relationship stays strong, but that does not always happen. I'm starting to learn programming seriously and I feel very confident in my abilities improving. Hopefully in the future I can do remote work with programming or find a workplace that is not incredibly social. My reasoning for being NEET is my aversion to socializing with people outside of my family. I really do not like spending my time with the majority of people and have very little drive for social interaction . American work culture encourages people to get to know each other and to do things together outside of work which is really bothersome. I hope to avoid that as long as possible! I have a family member who gets seriously depressed if she does not have friends to hang out with on the weekends. You could say I am the very opposite of that. Hopefully I can acclimate to all of this as time goes on, but I am not excited about it.

No. 473739

> Local tourism is cheap and there’s always fresh sea food. I want to just live with some very close female friends and we can go to the beach whenever we want

Sounds dreamy.

No. 473744

You're not a NEET once you have kids, then you're a stay at home parent.

No. 473752

File: 1571287602002.jpg (28.82 KB, 640x596, when-youre-too-tired-for-work-…)

yeah I look at my parents who have both worked physically taxing jobs since they were teenagers and have all sorts of aches and pains. my mum works herself into the ground sometimes until she makes herself ill. they both work so hard and make little more than minimum wage. I look at them and it doesn't inspire me to join the workforce (beyond the few hours I do anyway)

No. 473753

File: 1571287722394.jpg (99.65 KB, 910x1024, 1571189362934.jpg)


nta, i'm just sad because thats also true for where i live, on paper it has so much going for it but in reality it is also the murder and crime capital of the world. The beach is only 30 min away from me and yet i haven't gone in like 6 years, i am scared to leave my house even to go to the corner, and after 6 pm everything is closed and it is a ghost town. Feels bad man.

No. 473762

File: 1571289426877.jpg (22.34 KB, 640x599, me-opening-my-eyes-to-see-i-ha…)

>fucked up at school through truancy and beginnings of an anxiety disorder, was barely there. left at 16 just scraping 3 GCSE passes
>wanted to go to college to retake my gcses or do art or media or fucking anything to be with my friends
>anxiety disorder with panic attacks made that impossible for me
>went to a centre 2x a week on a scheme called 'entry to employment'. spent my time with around 4 boys who were there for petty crimes. didn't belong there one bit. used to cry thinking of my friends at college while I was there lol. would go to the job centre occasionally while there but mostly we did jack
>took GCSE maths and an IT course with learn direct (any UK anons remember that?) once I left there
>NEET for real from 17-19
>first job as an admin assistant at 19. lasted mere months. too stressful
>NEET again from 19-21
>21-29 soul destroying cleaning jobs with bouts of NEETdom but at least I don't see many people and can get on with my work while listening to music/audiobooks. only work 4 hours a week in the early mornings sometimes late evenings. I earn around £32 a week lmao

I live with my parents and they're really supportive of me thankfully. I'm very lucky. my anxiety has been very bad in the past, with severe depression and feeling suicidal too. I have no friends and only really leave the house to go shopping and to work. I want to stop doing cleaning jobs and do something new but it scares the crap out of me. I worry I wont be able to cope or that my anxiety/depression will take hold of me again. I'm fast approaching 30 though and want to try something new, I can't stay this way forever.

No. 473767

You have to find some activity to Involve yourself in to make friends,take up conga dancing,Knitting hell even try Karate or Judo but you gotta find something to involve yourself in

No. 473863

I know, I know. I would love to join a yoga class actually. one reason I don't do this is because I think people once they get to know me will think I'm weird or that I'm boring or pity me because of my life situation

No. 473877

You don’t need to share your situation with anyone. Do not make that a preset for trying. If you decide to take the chance to talk to someone/make a friend, you will likely find that they don’t care. We put too much emphasis on the things we find abnormal about ourselves, but in reality most people have these fears. If you decide to take up that yoga class (which I think you should!), you’ll probably feel a lot of anxiety first, but you will organically have small interactions with others, which can only help you grow. Baby steps first. Don’t let your fears control your ability to search for happiness, if that’s what you want for your life.

>former neet of 10 years, now living a “normal” life.

No. 474210

I was NEET from the ages 14 to 20, I literally did not go to high school at all and just got my GED when I turned 18. Today I quit my job of almost 2 years and I am not 100% sure what to do with myself now. I have more than enough money to not work for many months since I still live with my mom. I intended to do this anyways since I hated the job ever since I started it and grew to hate it even more with new horrible supervisors. I don’t want to work retail ever again but I have no real ambitions or goals in life. I’m honestly very afraid about my future and I don’t know what to do next but I don’t really regret quitting my job either.

No. 474211

Get a Job that you know you might like in a chill place

No. 474240

I feel like I live in a weird normie/neet limbo. I have a career, pay my bills, live by myself in a place I pay for… But I also have no friends, no man wants to touch me with a 10 foot pole, and I spend 90% of my free time playing video games. Every day I feel like it gets harder to get out of bed and go to work. All I want is to be a shut in for ten-ish years then kill myself, but I keep going for some reason. I think I'll snap some day and just kms instead of neeting out and enjoying some hermitism for a while…

No. 474324

>wake up to automatic negative thoughts
>first depression shower at 5:30am - not too long tho bc Mom needs to get ready for work
>impending panic at the state of my life and no clear path out
>read imageboards and reddit until I fall asleep again
>wake up again at 8
>2nd depression shower and smoking weed in bathroom or lying in bed until bf wakes up around 10 or 11
>wash face/brush teeth ane throw in clean sweatpants and huge t shirt
>run any errands such as buying more cigarettes, weed, or candy
>run errands while smoking weed
>get home, smoke more weed in the bathrom
>eat snacks and candy until nap time around 3
>wake up again at 7pm, maybe cook dinner, maybe get fast food, eat
>smoke more weed in our car, parked in a space near my home bc I don't want my mom to see how much weed we smoke
>get home, eat some bullshit snack or leftovers
>fall asleep around 11pm
>sleep for 3 hours, rest of night spent in fitful sleep until 4-5am

Either this is a blessed life and I need to embrace it and be happy or I'm a complete piece of shit and I need to change everything about my life right now. I'm almost 30 fucking years old. Someone please press rewind

No. 474373

where do you get all the weed and snack money? sounds like you spend lots of money per day

No. 474383

do you want friends and a man or do you feel bad for not having them because of societal expectations?

No. 474390

Ugh, this one hit close to home for me. Only I'm even older, I'm 34. I recently applied for a couple of jobs at a grocery store, but I dunno if I'll even get hired, considering my lack of experience and education.

Maybe you could apply for disability due to your chronic illness. I'm sorry you're having such a shit time dude, I understand though. It might sound stupid, but some sort of therapy might help? I had to be upped on my meds, and it's helped me. I dunno if you can afford that though, or if there are any alternatives to where you can get therapy on a sliding scale/for free.

As for friends, it may not seem like much, but you can always rant to us on here.

No. 474420

Anon are you me? I have a career that might allow me to work remote and while it's nice the only social interaction I'll get is with my family and the supervisor. Also doesn't help living in a small town filled with boomers and couples w/children. No friends to watch youtube vids with or go to the beach, no bf to cuddle… I honestly want to do the same as you but killing myself would devastate my parents.

No. 474447

Your life is boring because you made it that way and your "depression" is you feeling rightfully empty and sad because of your own inaction and self-indulgent stagnation

No. 474451

What are some good NEET recovering resources ?

No. 474539

Got a job in my dream career (which was fairly niche) back in 2013, moved out of my abusive parents' home. Then developed some medical issues, lost that job, and had to move back in with my parents.
I really haven't recovered since then. I had a job for a couple of years (2014-2016) but I've been unemployed for 3 years now.
I do odd jobs and take commissions at least but I feel so pathetic. My friends are all getting PhD s and whatnot and even though they're understanding of my situation I still feel so disgusting and pathetic.
I know that I got dealt a very different hand than people who don't have any learning disabilities or major medical issues and didn't grow up with a violent alcoholic dad but still.
I've been working with a social worker and I'm gonna get set up with a vocational rehab program once we get some paperwork stuff sorted out so there is a light at the end of the tunnel but it's so hard to see it.

(I've also started to become very emotionally volatile about my art, which makes getting it done harder. I'm pretty good for someone who never had any formal education in it and it's the only thing that keeps me from feeling completely worthless.)

No. 474549

File: 1571499961203.png (122.74 KB, 500x581, 1566853680736.png)

No. 474552

You live at mom's with your boyfriend, whom I presume give you an allowance for your weed and candy since you didn't mention ever having to go to work.
You have access to a car and the ability to drive it.
You have tons of time.
You mother tolerates this kind of lifestyle.

Yes you have an incredibly charmed life that you are squandering because you're unmotivated and too cozy with routine.
Why not research some activities or low cost hobbies you could do in between naps and munchy runs? It's not like weed dulls inspiration and imagination.

I agree with other anons that you are making yourself depressed. You feel no purpose because you're not assigning any to your life.

No. 474560

what do you want your life to look like? since you use the word depression it suggests you want something to change in which case I'm sorry but you gotta cut down on the weed. If you have the luxury of not having to work then what about studying something, doesn't have to be a full on full time degree, could just be part time or evening classes in something fun like art or creative writing. or a part time low stress job or volunteer work or anything

you can either go about it by changing one thing at a time or you can do something drastic like apply for a course or a ob that would force you to move out and change everything all at once. but yeah start by thinking about what you would like your days to look like.

No. 474561

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I finally got a really great job, the whole team are absolutely hilarious, and our training consists of parties and playing board games. I finally feel like I have a job where I don't feel lonely for once.

I'm also applying for university, fortunately my partner and his mom are really smart people and can help me with the whole process. I'm planning to get in with a test though, but there's a lot of math, and I am hopeless at math. I hope I do well though.

No. 474563

same anon, I was grouped in with illiterate jobless boomers with an assumed criminal record at some dumbass "employment support" company just so I could continue getting government benefits because 0 out of the 100's of jobs I applied for didn't want a junior with less than 5 years experience

No. 474566

First off, thank you for not being disgusted with me.
My bf gets money either thru working or thru his parents.
I cry evey day bevause my family split up a million years ago because my dad came out of the closet. Then he left the country for a decade. Before thay, he wasn't super keen on me anyway. My mom, who was once a soft place to land, turned to the bottle. My home life went from secure, to cold and desolate in the course of 3 years. Then I dropped all my friends. This is around freshman year of hs. I was bullied by one of my siblings growing up and as a result I was nkt o ly super critical of ,yself, but also of my peeers, and when I feemed them "lame," I dropped them. Then I stopped going to school. I can't really remember what the fuck my parents were doing at tbis point, and idk why they didn't guide me and help me. I eventually graduated by independent study. This whole time I am hanging out with stoners and kids drinking way too much way too often. My home life is the same - my mom let us drink at the house so sometimes my friends would be there without me present. My older sibling latched onto my friends (not really close friends, but the people I would get fucked up with at that point in time. Thinking back on it, none of them liked me anyways and zi didn't like them.) and as I isolated in my room, they created bonds. My mom was working and everything, but since the divorce she made friends with an ex's bar-hopping whore of a mother and that became my mom's past time. And mine became knocking hard on our shared wall when she would bring a one night stand home and loudly have sex. One time she hit me all over my head because I spoke up to her. Meanwhile before my dad left the country he's dating a man that's only a handful of years older than me, his youngest child. Now that he's gone, he's with a man who is even younger than me.
I'm drinking so mush at this point that idk how I'm alive today. I went to the hospital once when I couldn't stop throwing up. I was 18. I remember being surprised at how much the nurses gave a shit that someone well below the drinking age could end up like this.

Anyways no one asked for this but I feel compelled to get it out.
I guess my point is that I have never accomplished anything, I went to college on and off for like 2 semesters. I couldn't ealk to my classed without feeling like everyone was looking and hating me. So I stopped. No one cared enough to step in, so off I went. I truly thought I could fuck off school, my only responsibility, and I would be okay. Now I'm an empty shell of a woman who has 0 responsibilities and 0 accomplishments.
I wish I could explain what this cycle feels like. Being sucked back into my bed and letting another day pass. I feel like I'm in the middle of a bomb exploding or something and all I can really do is white knuckle it and cover my ears. No resources to spend on unctioning outside my front door.

My only shining baby step is that I started exercising for 30 mins a day, on most days,for about a year now. It's my bf's car that we drive around, and he is starting a new job after next week. I think once he gets his schedule locked down I will try a class, or even driving somewhere like the library, on my own. Then maybe I'll do a class of some kind. I would ultimately like to work a simple office job or something. I feel like a job is the end-all-be-all here and I will feel so much more valuable and less embarrassed if I have one.

This has got to be all over the place. I'm sorry for not proofreading. Also I'm sure there are a gazillion typos. Sorry. I'm poor bc I'm too useless and self indulgent to get a job despite my pain even thougbph every single other person has to and somehow does.

No. 474567

must be nice being a neet with a bf,I wish I had one :(

No. 474568

Idk how I got so lucky. He listens to me and loves the shit out of me. He doesn't think I'm a piece of shit and he's all the warmth that my parents don't have.
But eveyone focuses on what they don't have, I'm envious of anons in here who go to college and have pools of "normal" life experience…

I cry all the time when I see children and innocent, cute things. I went to a state fair and I couldn't handle the wholesomeness and I broke down crying. I had to explain that to my mom and sibling and niece who were there with me. I feel like an insane person. I know everyone carries pain, and a lot of ppl went thru way more fucked up ahit than me. So why can't I function???

No. 474582

Math has to be practiced anon! If you can look up or ask around what kind of problems you'll have and then solve a heckton of similar ones! Good luck!

No. 474593

I never answered this. I want my life to be taking care of my bf/husband, in a place of our own, gardening and cooking healthy foods, keeping up with finances, supporting my nieces and nephews, raising dogs and chickens, uwu homestead life. I don't actually want to work, but I feel like such a piece of shit bc I don't, and it may be the quickest solution. My bf is okay with being the breadwinner. I just have to wait for him to figure out how. He's been so close to a lucrative career but unimaginable bullshit prevented that on numerous occasions. Now I'm slowly growing angry and bitter because I don't have things I won't even work for. I hate myself

No. 474636

master's degree lol, i wish i was in that kind of relationship

hey anon i know this is a late response but i just wanted to thank you for replying. i've been thinking about what you said all week, and it's carried me through. have been less upset when things go wrong or when social shit goes badly. less sad about my teacher friend ditching me, too. you're a good egg.
i hope you are doing ok?

No. 474638

You're unimaginably spoiled yet all you can do is complain about is what you don't have. I guess it's natural but it really disgusts me. You're like one of the super rich kids who complains about wanting to be normal. I feel like it's even worse because you have a loving boyfriend despite not contributing anything. If you were in my shoes I bet you would kill yourself.

No. 474653

NTA but you’re literally just as cringey and awful as the anon you’re replying to. congrats on winning the award for most tragic and pathetic life, but nobody gives a fuck.

No. 474657


I genuinely hope you can one day get to a point where you respect yourself enough that you don't limit your ambitions to playing live-in bang maid for a man who could leave you high and dry at literally any point. You probably don't believe it, but you're capable of so much more.

No. 474731

This is a thread for recovering from NEETDOM not infighting

No. 474739

Aw anon, I'm glad my kinda lame advice has been useful! And that you have had a decent week! It kinda felt like we're in similar set ups (well, I'm just an undergrad but still) so I wanted to like let you know you aren't alone and others understand even tho I'm not the best at advising. Also if your teacher friend doesn't want your surely delightful company, it is his loss and your dog is probably cuter than his anyway!

I managed to attend all my classes and properly focus instead of zoning out, but then I kinda fucked up by not going to a workshop as I got there bit late and couldn't gather myself to enter the room alone and all. Had quality socialisation time at work however as my fav manager was on, he's like a funny yet very dysfunctional father to me kek.

Like I know the key is zoning out just a bit and understanding that no one ever notices you're that awkward/weird/etc, when I'm in a good mindspace it works and I'm golden, but then some other days (like workshop Wednesday) I feel like crying if someone looks at me lol. Hope the next week is good to both of us!

No. 474752

lol my life is fine, not tragic. But I have to go to uni and I'm single so it makes my life unequivocally worse off than hers. Understand?

As for something contributing to the thread, I was kind of in a semi-NEET rut (took time at uni and worked only part time with an easy job) and what cured me was going WWOFing in South America.

No. 474759

Realistically if you don't plan on having kids but still want a breadwinner husband to foot all bills while you go through life never getting a job: this dynamic will breed resentment and put too much stress on one person's shoulders. Eventually arguments will turn into you being reminded that you contribute nothing.

And it leaves you really vulnerable , if you break up what happens to you, where do you live post break up when you have no income or job skills of your own? You can't rely on that as a stable life plan. Relationships end all the time, marriages too

Last year I faced homelessness when my seemingly perfect long term relationship ended, I realised that years of depending on a guys income (at his insistence) had chipped away at my self esteem. Independence is worth the hard work

No. 474763

>Realistically if you don't plan on having kids but still want a breadwinner husband to foot all bills while you go through life never getting a job: this dynamic will breed resentment and put too much stress on one person's shoulders. Eventually arguments will turn into you being reminded that you contribute nothing.
I absolutely agree with this. Why should anybody be ok with financing another person doing nothing? Even if you cook 3 times (while he probably isn't even at home for lunch) and clean daily that still wouldn't amount to more than like 4 hours, meanwhile he should slave away at a full time job that makes enough to to buy you a house and support your lifestyle and your hobbies? Him snapping and throwing you out one day would be completely justified.

No. 474775

>Eventually arguments will turn into you being reminded that you contribute nothing.
Even when she IS a SAHM there's a good chance she will get this treatment, men legitimately do not think of child rearing as anywhere near as much work as his 9-5. And they commend women for being housewives right up until it suits him to hold his earning power and tangible contributions over his wife's head.

But frankly if there's no kids involved, it's not a good look to be a stay at home partner. Just because someone is willing to finance your NEEThood doesn't mean you should accept it, they are either pathetic or have ill intent. No normal person would want to fully support another adult like that.

No. 474781

My you don't sound bitter at all

No. 474783

Uh yes, I am less than pleased by men turning out to be abusers who enjoy a powerless, financially dependent partner? What's your point?

No. 474788

Just because your relationship turned out to be bad doesn't mean everyone else's is

No. 474802

Nta but that's so pathetic. You really think people are bitter and jealous because you can be a neet and anon doesn't have somebody to leech from? That's what you're proud of? What you have with your bf can't even be called a relationship. Anybody who's not a student, not working or childless deserves to get dumped. You have zero purpose or value. How can you call doing nothing a life? That honestly angers me. Your mom didn't go through the pain of pregnany and giving birth for you to waste your life like that while still being smug about it.

No. 474805

>be me half a year ago
>hopeless NEET for years
>dirty AF
>plague on teeth
>taste of death in my mouth 24/7
>doughy skinnyfat body that is starting to form a gut
>greasy skin like sandpaper and pores huge AF
>face white as a ghost but body has normal tan
>invest my hard earned NEETbux to maybe get a bit of money someday
>two month fotward
>still no money
>still miserable and sudoku is all over my mind
>start to do bodyweight exercise and yoga almost daily to min three times a week for 20min
>buy meme skincare products like chem peelings and retinol
>start to brush teeth daily
>start to take iron supplements
>eat better
>neutral taste in mouth even after sleeping
>face has color and the skin is soft and pores are less visible
>also face looks clean for the very first time in my life
>skin much tighter
>stomach flat, almost visible abs
>look like a normal 20 something
>my head doesn't feel so light anymore
>not tired anymore, no more day sleeping
>even made my first money yesterday
A-am I going to make it?

No. 474810

t. wagecuck

No. 474811

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we're all gonna make it

No. 474824

I'm proud of you Anon! That's a nice improvement.

No. 474838

Don't know when this turned into a pro-NEET thread where posters think it's cool to swap living off your parents for living off a bf (or desperately wishing for a rich bf lol) The whole point of this thread is to get out of NEETdom

Making good progress anon. Keep on top of dental care! A decade after leaving my NEETdom phase I'm just about finished dealing with dental appointments to fix all the neglect, been expensive

Have the iron supplements helped with fatigue?

No. 474861

that's fantastic anon! Keep it up!

No. 474869

nta but I didn't asked to be born and while I love my mom, I don't have to like my parents or thank them for bringing me onto this planet which I really wish they didn't. Retarded People like you that make such stupid points are so annoying.

t. not a NEET

No. 474878

People who go to college, how did you go down that path? Was it always a given? How did you know at a child's age how important secondary education is? How did you pay for it? Weren't you scared as hell to make a financial commitment like that at 17-18 years old?

No. 474887

Thx ily.

Yes! I'm wide awake all day. Even in the morning. Feels like I have superpowers.

No. 474894

I definietly don't think it's cool. I posted about more than my bf, anons just took that and ran with it. A literal troll post after my effortpost abt my life. I want to talk to ppl about how they overcame pain, or how they do it daily, in order to function. Everyone must do this. Why can't I?

You weren't responding to me (bf NEET you're angry at) in this, but I agree with your feelings.

>No normal person would want to fully support another adult like that.
Really? In this whole wide world, you think there are NO people willing to suffer working so their loved one(s) don't have to?

I understand what you mean. I probably would.

Thanks. I think about the high-and-dry thing often. I guess I accepted that if that happens, I'll be forced to get a job. It happened to people close to me before and that's how it goes. I guess I'll deal with that if and when it happens.

I've been trying to understand your comment for a while now. Are you being sarcastic, or do you mean your life is "worse off" bc you have to work for a living?
How did you go to South Africa? I often daydream about going to a halfway house but for NEETS.
Like exactly what they have for drug addicts, with the rigid routine and slow integration into the workforce/society. As if I couldn't get any more pathetic. Or one of those ranch programs where you work your ass off in order to not be a directionless piece of shit.

I understand whay you're saying about resentment. I'll keep it in mind.

Because he wants to. Idk what else to tell you guys. He is okay with making the money.

What if I told you guys that he does like the idea of me being at home? And that I like the idea of being protected? Am I not allowed to feel this way? Can we explore this without hurling insults at each other? May as well throw in that we don't want kids.

These are not me btw

I'm not powerless. Not every man is a creep.

I somehow didn't anticipate anons latching onto my boyfriend. I should've known better. Where do I go from here? I came in here to lay out my life story for some reason. I think I wanted pity from others after posting about my family. Pity and gentle help. LOL I hate myself

No. 474895

uk anon so perhaps not the answer you're looking for, basically you only have to pay back loans once you earn over £21,000 and the payments are taken off your income before it gets to you, like income tax is in this country. you only pay back something stupid like 10% of anything you earn over £21,000 so it's manageable. also the debt doesn't affect your credit history or getting a mortgage or whatever. so as financial commitments go it was actually an option to get some kind of a life without working and mooching off parents.
as for knowing higher ed is important, well my granddad was called to study at oxford back in the days when they had to pay you to attend. he was a poor immigrant in the black country and his mother worked two jobs to get him elocution lessons and better his chances of social mobility. going to oxford changed his entire life trajectory - if he hadn't had that chance he'd probably have been sent down the pit for forty odd years. so it's always been really important in our family. i think most kids in the uk go on to higher ed though because of degree inflation. a bachelors is the minimum here now if you want a job that's not retail.

No. 474898

Ah yeah, I should've specified USA anons.
Thanks for the reply– the importance your family put on university was enlightening.

My father wanted us all to be good little students like he was, but literally put no effort into educating us on the importance of college, pushing us into the right programs and directions, etc, much less how to pay for something like that, or god forbid, contributing himself to a fund. Then he gets disgusted with his loser American children and fucks off to China where everyone is an amazing scholar, and worth his time. I'm bitter as fuck that two people as intelligent as my parents didn't guide someone as intelligent as I am into secondary education. How do I stop being this pathetic? I wish I wanted to go to school. I don't.

No. 474899

Years ago I was struggling with a disability that would affect me more some days than others. I had an arrangement of cleaning and cooking for me and my partner (and his son at weekends) while he worked, even on painful days I kept up with it and everyone was happy

Two years in when the honeymoon period ended and naturally you go from having sex twice a day to 2/3 times a week he starts arguing with me and telling me that I -contribute nothing- We already split other bills from the beginning but he demanded that I start paying half of the rent immediately. As someone on a small disability payment he knew this was impossible. Looking back he was only happy when he was getting sex every single day. Fucked me up when I realised that despite me cleaning, cooking and splitting other bills; I was -fucking for rent- in his eyes

I now own my own house and work from home, the independence feels amazing!

No. 474905

That's terrible. How can someone be so callous? You really didn't realize he was a piece of shit before moving in with him and assuming care of his son (on the weekends)? And it didn't tip you off when he would allow you to do all the cooking while in pain?
I'm glad you got out of that shitshow anon.

No. 474914

He seemed great for two years, we had one fight when I had a painful couple of days and he came home to a dirty apartment but apart from that he seemed kind, generous, on the weekends we'd often eat out somewhere and he'd pay for the 3 of us

Shows how men can suddenly change if they're not getting the exact amount of sex they want. I don't want to feel like turning down sex will cost me the roof over my head. Glad to be paying my way now!

No. 474915

>current neet living with parents
>started being a neet in HS
>left public school to do online classes
>my grades were horrible due to depression, missing most of my credits to graduate
>depression and anxiety was getting worse
>home life was shit
>taking online classes meant no reason to socialize or go out
>slowly stopped leaving house
>got fatter and fatter, now horribly obese (380+lbs)
>depression and anxiety is the worse its been, think about killing myself so i can stop disappointing and leeching off parents
>developed agoraphobia
>haven't left house in 8 or so years
>can't even answer the phone without panicking
>in the next few months mom is taking me to get my ID (never had one)
>will also be going to see doctors to try and get help
>am hoping to get on disability, welfare, something to help my parents with money while i try and get help

i feel like even more of a failure now even though i'm trying to fix what i've done to myself. in the back of my head, i tell myself that if i can't find a way to at least help my parents money wise, i might as well off myself to lessen their burden at this point

No. 474922

If it helps to hear anon I was housebound with agoraphobia for years, I know it feels like a 'forever thing' at the time but you can slowly expand your comfort zone and start to go out little by little

It helps to have meds to take the edge off the anxiety and a family member to (quite literally) hold your hand in the beginning

No. 474926

That's terrifying. I'm glad you found home within yourself then. What kind of parents raise these guys?? That's getting off topic tho.

No. 474931

how old are you anon? I have a (male) friend in a similar situation who hadn't left the house in six years or so, like >>474922 said he took it in baby steps and has a part time job now, goes to therapy and feels a lot more positive. do you have a lot of online friends?

No. 474936

these next upcoming months where i'll be going out to see doctors and whatnot is both stressing and scaring me, but also feels kind of good? i'm hoping something good comes out from all this

i just turned 24 recently. up until recently, i had a small group of online friends but not anymore. i have trouble being social. i don't know what it is, i am very introverted i know that but keeping up with people and being social is always exhausting to me. i mean, i know it's my mental health that is doing this, but i can go days, weeks, not talking to anyone and i like that. i don't miss talking to people, i like being alone :/

No. 474937

>LOL I hate myself
No, you don't. You clearly seem to believe that you're deserving of not having to move a finger while your bf totally loves to suffer working for you. Why do you need to be cared for? You're a grown-ass woman. What do you need to be protected from? The world outside is not as scary as you think. If you don't change that attitude you will never get better. Your bf is probably still putting up with you now while hoping you're bettering yourself but deep down you both know that this is just unfair and impossible to last.
Reading through this thread made me realize that most neets are not poor mentally ill souls but lazy and entitled womanchildren trying to come up with excuses to somehow justify that "lifestyle".

No. 474942

you're still very young and you're not a failure. I understand why seeing a doctor seems scary but they'll be able to help you and it's a step forward. good luck anon!

No. 474944

I know there's dread coming up to facing things like seeing a doctor or other appointments but I always remember experiencing real highs from achieving those things, from an agoraphobics perspective attending a doctors appt is like conquering mount everest.. if there's any silver lining to the situation it's the happiness that comes with those successes

You might always have something like social anxiety but exposure therapy really tackles agoraphobia

No. 474949

You responded to 2 of my posts and I honestly have no fucking clue who you are or what your original post in this thread is. Imagine being so self obsessed you assume anyone making a general comment on dynamics in breadwinner/NEET is an attack on you and your bf, specifically.

No. 474962

Ah sorry. ITAYRT I had this exact thought about my multiple posts itt. So stupid. I am self-obsessed. Idk which posts of yours I quoted, otherwise I would clarify. Even though really, what's the fucking point.
I don't feel entitled to him working to support me. But I'll accept because you're right- I'm terrified of the outside world.

This has been exactly what I knew it would be. Humiliating. I knew that before I posted and I still did it.

I need therapy. I'm going to focus on my baby step for now and make sure to get up with intention, and to do my bike exercises and eat breakfast. I'm going to also make the steps towards getting back into therapy.

No. 474976

I think some of you NEETs have it better than you think. I feel like I can't be a NEET because I'm too deficient in some ways. I really NEED to travel and see people or otherwise I feel really bad. If you're fine with your situation and don't need to see people, I don't see what's so bad.

Just curious, how do you work from home?

Go to wwoof.net or workaway.info. Then buy a plane ticket and go there. You will have a lot of work to do. It doesn't seem like you're ready yet.

No. 475000

neetdom is frequently very unhealthy but a lot of neets end up in that position because theyre already unhealthy. loling tho at the incredibly salty anons who tie self worth WHOLLY to work, though who are calling neets names. they sound jealous for some weird reason. you can make money without being technically employed, but people aren't defined by their jobs, jesus. neets can get out of it. people in this thread that are calling depressed women names aren't going to inspire them to do better imo.

No. 475005

Nobody is jealous of you neets, get that into your thick head

No. 475010

nah, they clearly are, from both this thread and the stupid questions thread. being concerned for these women is one thing, but it clearly goes beyond that with the way these posts are phrased. making men who volunteer to support their gfs (usually) because they want control over women out to be "uwu victims of abusive neet women", etc. it's laughable.

No. 475015

>making men who volunteer to support their gfs (usually) because they want control over women out to be "uwu victims of abusive neet women", etc. it's laughable.
Which one is it? "My uwu amazing bf just loooves slaving away at work to finance my life" or the guy who's slaving away at work to finance is gf who is doing nothing for him is actually the abuser?

No. 475019

i dont think those men are wonderful. have never said it, i wouldnt want to put my faith in them, i have no bf and i'm not neet, but the women complaining about neets living off their bfs for being "leeches sucking off these bepenised saints until they snap uwu" is clearly just salty bullshit. most men who do this aren't angelic saviors. they're often manipulators. i wouldn't recommend women be reliant on men precisely bc of that reason and that critique is valid, but i don't think neet anons are vampiric soulsuckers with nothing to offer anyone.

No. 475034

Bf anon and the retards going off on her for being a leach are ruining this fucking thread. Can we just stop acknowledging her and focus on the anons trying to better themselves and work their way out of neetdom, since that's what the thread is meant to be. Jesus.

No. 475120

Some of you NEET anons are pretty sad. It's really pitiable. But why do I get the feeling that you guys drag others for random shit on other threads?

No one ever said that people who finance NEETs are abused. Where the fuck did you get that?

To each their own, so I guess some guys would like a NEET girlfriend. But it's frustrating that in this so-called age of feminism a lot of guys don't care about their gf having a career at all to the point they don't care if their gf has any kind of job or not.

No. 475127

This thread was supposed to be about helping us recovering from NEETDOM not this bullshit,Please I beg all of you to just stop this infighting so we can focus on bettering ourselves(namefagging)

No. 475132

Why don’t you just find a guy to support you?

No. 475159

Nice, I like your sense of humour. Add more oil to the blazing fire.

No. 475165

I’m younger than everyone here, I’m 18 and pretty much ever since HS graduation earlier this year i’ve been living a pretty NEET lifestyle. I didn’t have many friends back in school, and now I only really have my online friends. I have college classes once a week at night, but other than that I just stay home. I had existing issues with my mental health that have gone untreated for years and I feel like being so alone just exacerbated them. I used to go out a lot to concerts and such, but i had a realization at one that everyone around me was having a good time around me, but i wasn’t.. so I left early. It’s really messed with me having that so I’ve avoided the 4 other concerts I had tickets for out of the feet that I would have another breakdown like that. I’m slowly trying to build up the… confidence? to finally get help for my issues with depression and such, and in the mean time I’m saving up for a guitar to be a new hobby since my old one of going to concerts has been ruined for me, kind of. I can’t really help my college situation, and the student body isn’t really my age group, so I’m just trying to hope i can throw myself into a self sufficient hobby. will help. My parents wouldn’t ever let me go full NEET, it’s either go to college or get a job in order to keep living with them, but being so solitary has exacerbated my issues so now I just feel like I’m just trying to make myself feel better until i can finally get professional help. Over the past few months since grad i’ve just been feeling so intensely suicidal and thinking about self harm for the first time in years, so I’m just a tad scared about that.

No. 475172

>some of you neets are pretty sad
No shit? Why come here to shit on neets. This is a neet RECOVERY thread.

No. 475185

HELP I've been a NEET roughly a year and just got a call from a recruitment agency asking to meet since I applied for a bunch of jobs one night. This is the second time I‘ve had ANY interest since then.

But it‘s for more skilled occupations (need 2 degrees) and the only agencies I went to in the past were the no skill types where I just turned up on the day to be a server or something.

I don‘t know what to do AT ALL. Is it a proper interview?? The guy just said "come in for a chat".

Christ I need this, I‘m financially dependent on bf and he‘s been acting worse recently. I need this option to get out if it comes to it. I can‘t fuck up but it‘s been too long.

No. 475186

I'm not shitting on NEETs. I feel sorry for them. I don't understand how people can live like this. I do shit on NEETs who think they have the right to drag people.

Or maybe I can. I had periods where I was semi NEET. (In uni but missing class and failing classes/working part time)

Here's what helped me to my currently busy life:
>Did yoga
I didn't do much but I tried to do some every week. I should do it more often now
>Worked on an organic farm
It showed me how important being active and social was
>Got a new best friend
My old best friend was not very supportive. I got a new best friend after reconnecting with an old friend and being roommates. Honestly this is what helps me the most and made the transition back to uni so much easier.
>Got on ADHD medicine
I'm diagnosed with ADHD but adderall is just so helpful in general, imo. It really helps with the tests/projects that I couldn't deal with before. It also makes you feel so much more confident

Is this helpful or not enough?

No. 475273

thank you… I've slowly gotten a little better thanks to my boyfriend (math nerd)

No. 475279

I'm really happy for you! Also make a note to see a dentist for a checkup if you're able to, it's very important

No. 475280

The thing about being a NEET and taking baby steps is that it feels like being acutely confronted with your inadequacy. Personally, I feel humiliated when I'm to focus on doing one simple task for my whole day, week, month. It's easy to give up based on those embarrassing feelings. Not only is it sobering in that regard, but it's actually difficult to pull off. It's kind of ironic that one has to take baby steps in order to build themselves up into a functioning adult.

How did you get a job/volunteer opportunity at the farm? What kinds of things did you do? That sounds really cool.

No. 475284

Sorry for delete/repost

I just want to put it out there that I'm exercising rn after waking up. Then I'll eat breakfast bc I'm terrible at eating BEFORE I'm famished. Then a shower. Then tomorrow I will do the same thing.
I'm fortunate in that my dad will cover some therapy (bc he feels guilty…this sounds so depressing) I don't feel super comfortable asking so I'm giving it some thought first, but I know he will probably help.
Ugh I hate looking for therapists. But I've done it before and I can definitely do it again.
Previously I went to therapy, and that was the only thing. It was out of bed for my session, then back in my bed aterwards. This time I want to be actively taking uncomfortable steps irl and use therapy sessions to support me. I know I can let go of the family trauma I went through. I can feel my brain trying to expel it and move on. (That sounds insane but idk how to explain it.)

I want to be one of the people who say "I know you don't believe me but it really does get better." Anyway. Back to my baby steps.

No. 475285

nta but there's an organization called WWOOF, which stands for World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms/Willing Workers On Organic Farms and it's exactly that, a volunteer job at a farm of your choice! They provide you with food and accomodation. They have them all over the world, I've been planning to do this for a long time. They have different time options too. You've gotta pay for a membership for the service though (prevents people with malicious intent or people who aren't really serious about it from just signing up).

No. 475286

Thanks for the info! I wonder how muh it costs in my area… I'm off to do some research!

No. 475290

It's $70 AUD for 12 months for me, I think that's great because you can go for a month, then come back a couple months later if you're not busy etc

No. 475336

>the stupid questions thread

Those posts/anons gave me some very much needed perspective on how ridiculous it is to be scared of the judgements of other people. Genuinely grateful for this experience.

No. 475401

Anon, I'm proud of you and hope you'll be able to flourish in life.

No. 475651

Thank you so much for your encouragement! I'm on the bike again rn. I felt so much better yesterday just bc I decided to commit myself to recovery from this lifestyle. Now, just to keep going when that positivity inevitably blows away. I like what another anon suggested which was to "put your brain on autopilot" when you have to do something but your brain is throwing a tantrum. It's very basic and even obvious advice, but for some reason the way she worded it has stuck with me.
Onto a shower and cooking a big breakfast for me and my partner.

No. 476013

I'm biking again! Pedalling my way out of neetdom

No. 476373

Who cares but I'm doing it again. Follow along w your own baby steps/routines my sweet precious neets let's do it together!

No. 476588

Good luck to both anons

No. 476613

Semi-recovered NEET. Maybe recovered but not normie status.(4 years, agoraphobia) I feel like I should be happier. I have a part time job, I'm being social again, putting effort into my appearance, seeing family, therapy, getting into new hobbies…. I'm still as miserable as I was being NEET but now it's just more stressful lol. Guess I keep my head down, keep on going, and hope it gets better.

No. 476641

trust me anon It gets better

No. 476642

I push everyone away , but all i really want is someone hugs me and tell me its okay

No. 476645

does that still apply if you're an adult learner? I went straight into training/a job instead of uni but went NEET for a while and am considering my options. I somewhat miss education for the structure and familiarity plus I want another qualification.

No. 476762

>How did you get a job/volunteer opportunity at the farm? What kinds of things did you do? That sounds really cool.

I applied in the farm's website.

My duties were doing basic work around the farm for a couple of hours a day including cleaning. I was sick when I first got there, and I think the owner got kind of pissed that I wasn't doing much. However, it was winter and there wasn't that much to do.

Just google WWOFing or communes. I don't think you have to be qualified.

No. 476772


working for a paycheck is shit enough but you actually go out of your way to do labor for free lol. Even better than hiring illegals, just get neets.

No. 476899

Thanks! It was only me! Sorry for being annoying but I'm using this thread for motivation dammit!
I'm biking again today. I had a rough day yesterday but I'm on the bike today. And I will go inside, eat breakfast, and take a shower. Because that's my focus. I'm exploring what it feels like to have a bad day emotionally and not give up because of it.

It'll be okay anon. Let someone in.

No. 476901

Also I decided to refer to my efforts tp get out of this lifestyle as "recovery". It makes it much more official in my head. Language matters. It's true.
Is that a little bit extra? Maybe. Is this life or death? Not immediately so, but definitely yes. So I'm in recovery. Maybe this will click with someone else like it did with me. Also, yes this is embarrassing. Oh well. It's less embarrassing than not doing anything to improve myself.

No. 476905

ITAYRT and that sounds cool. I was initally turned off when you(? It may have been another anon) said it costs money, but it's not very much money. I live in a busy city with lots of farms, I may be able to find a free program yet. It's cool to speak to someone who already did it so thanks for the reply.

You're missing the whole point from the neet's perspective, but yeah it must be nice for those farms to get the free labor and any tax writeoffs that come with participation in such a program. Oh well, you can take what you need from it if you're the type of person who would benefit from this type of work.

No. 476953

File: 1572028177475.png (1.03 MB, 719x701, image0.png)

I dropped out of college for the second time two years ago and was a neet for a full year before getting a task job at a beauty store, but even then I still pretty much lived like a neet cause I only got 8 hours a week. After 6 months I finally got a second part time retail job and was working over 30 hours a week and it was really difficult, socially a lot more challenging and I was screamed at/criticized by customers constantly and after the first few months we got a new manager who I was really incompatible with, she constantly misunderstood what I was trying to say and gave me conflicting instructions and I had a massive mental breakdown and quit on the spot after working there for 3 months. Since then I moved to my boyfriend's house to work on a project for his family and while I'm technically working doing art and design and occasionally traveling for the project, I still feel like a neet cause there's no clear structure, no w2 and I feel like this will be unusual job experience and not very useful to making myself a productive member of society the way an actual job could. Now I'm just relying on him and his family instead of my own. They insist it's no problem and I'm being useful but I'm making no progress towards my goals of being able to drive and rent an apartment. I wish I could have handled wagie life or college but I just can't manage any steps I know I need to take to improve my life and interest keeps piling up on my student loans and everything about it just sucks.

No. 477066

recovery is a great way to put it! and it is true, changing the language surrounding the journey to your new and improved quality of life to be more positive makes all the difference. being a NEET shouldn't have such a "bad" perspective towards it, like other anons have expressed, majority of us became comfortable with the NEET lifestyle because it felt like it was the only way to feel safe, sometimes after a few bad experiences in the job world or just school being a drag.
after a while, we do realize, "maybe it's not so bad out there, but i don't know where to start exactly… or what's the safest way to approach this."
you got this, anons! there's tons of us former NEETs who want to you recover and we can help support your bravery.

No. 477118

File: 1572050649397.png (1.13 MB, 962x694, vlc_2019-06-18_21-44-32.png)

I have stopped being a NEET, after years of staying cooped up in my room. However, I truly do miss it.

I didn't mind being alone in my room, just reading shit on the internet and playing single-player games. Now I go to college(I enjoy what I'm being taught), get good grades and have a set of friends, but I get no enjoyment out of socialising with them. Even playing video games with them makes me annoyed, and I know it's not their fault.
I'm starting to think that human connections just aren't for me, even if I act welcoming and try to include others in conversations when I see them being left out.

My goal for now is to finish college so that I can land a comfy job/possibly become a webdev freelancer in the meantime, just to help my mother with the bills.

No. 477391

Thank you so much for your support. It makes a world of difference even to have anonymous support. Such a nice thing of you to do and I want to tell you how much it means to me!

I'm biking rn. I was going to take off today, but I think it's more important that I stick to the schedule. I'm not doing a grueling workout by any means.

Other things I'm doing with great intention:
-Taking multivitamin daily
-Taking allergy meds daily for the first time ever
-Planning other small routines such as cooking breakfast on Saturday mornings bc it's cozy and makes everyone feel good
-going to a social event bc I know it'll make me feel better even though I'm scared. I'll keep in mind the "autopilot" thing another anon suggested.
It sounds like a lot of stuff to do but really after bike+breakfast+shower I do usual neet things such as lying in bed for hours and smoking weed all day. Baby steps. Be intentionally basic.

No. 477393

I understand your feeling. Just do what makes you feel good anon. Sounds like you've got a good hold on yourself!

No. 477761

Stationary biking my way out of neetdom again this morning! I didn't want to do it but I literally have to. Tomorrow will be one week since I committed myself to recovery! I've slept better the past 2 nights. Hooray

No. 478882

>people unironically shilling communism in 2019 are either trolling or absolutely braindead.
I was saying thar communism was good for it's time. But both communism and capitalism have no place in 2019. They're both corpses of ideologies. Both rely on labour as the driving force, which is ridiculous in this age of smart machines. We need something fresh that takes into account the mindblowing technological advancements that occurred since both of these ideologies were formed. Hence I posted the critique of labour-oriented economy here >>472242.
I also recommend reading "Player Piano" by Kurt Vonnegut. Maybe fiction will better drive my point across than a philosophical essay.

No. 478892

you sound like one of them people of educated bg that go on to join a bizarro cult

No. 478898

I am so tired of receiving weird ad hominems on my post. What's your point?

No. 479105

Biking anon checking in - I missed Monday because I had a bit too much to drink at a friend's Halloween party on Sunday night. It sucks because Monday was the 7th day of 'recovery' and I would've liked to be consistent but it was a good trade off for hanging out with friends and having a good time. Other than that I've been on track and feeling good. I actually felt bored yesterday which leads into the next step of getting back into my hobby. I don't want to rush it yet though.
Later I'll go to my sibling's house and hang out and while that feels a little awkward it'll be worth it to see them and feel good about it.
Happy Halloween everyone!

No. 479124

I got a job and a driver's license but I still have every other classic NEET problem… no friends, living with my parents at 26, and have never been a real relationship (closest I ever got was having a FWB for a month who pointedly did not want a romantic relationship with me and who flat-out said I wasn't girlfriend material because I was because I was too much of a loser)

I have no idea how to even begin to fix my social issues. I'm alright at being polite and doing customer service tasks at work, but godawful at any kind of interaction that might lead to making friends.

No. 479136

do you have a hobby? I'm not trying to be patronizing but as an adult i find it is really hard to make friends outside of work/activities. Even just a little bit of social stimulation from a group helps work on those skills.

when I was lonely in college I joined a foraging club and honestly nobody in the club and I became very close but working together to find stuff and just chatting was nice. kind of like renting friends. I pick activities I can skip without guilt though like clubs or community classes. I find if I feel guilty for skipping (like if i'm paying for it) I avoid it altogether because I get overwhelmed.

No. 479164

I’d consider myself a slowly recovering NEET. I never really had friends because I was deaf and considered as the weird kid so I took to the internet. When I graduated high school I had high ambition and wanted a fresh start & applied for community college as I had college credit from dual enrollment and wanted the cheapest option. I enrolled as a full time student and had also gotten a full time 3rd shift factory job. That fall/winter killed me mentally and physically, I was an average A-B student and I had failed a class with 6% and slept through too many exams. I dropped out, started working from home for my step-dad’s business and even though I have my own car and earn better money than I would anywhere else right now, I feel like a failure. I want to be more than this, I want to get higher education but I hate the idea of being in debt.

No. 479193

Ok rude question here, but how can you follow properly lectures/classes if you're deaf? This is a general question btw.

And you should take your vitamin D (I assume you already do this) and pack yourself really good with clothes if you want to avoid getting winter's depression.

Consider yourself highly privileged for being able to work at your step-dad's company tbh, because you're not really a NEET if you're employed btw.

No. 479199

The school will provide me an ASL interpreter if I ask and most teachers I’ve had were pretty cool with providing notes if they talked too fast. I take my full range of vitamins no worries, but I may have to stock up on winter clothes as I’m in the basement. I do feel privileged because its right out of our garage so cost of living and travel is nonexistent, but the home/family combo can stress me out at times

No. 479378

The biggest issue I’m facing is that I’m an ACOA. While I do have a job I destroyed my personal life, going cold turkey from any social media and dropping contact with all of my friends. I just lived with my parents hoping things would get better but if anything the alcoholism and abuse got worse.

After a couple years I went to community college and it kind of helped with socializing, keeping me away from my parents, and I liked that my classmates were friendly but not close. But now some of my old friends are trying to get into contact with me again and I don’t think they realize how closed off I’ve become. I have so many ACOA traits, like being cripplingly indecisive and things like doors opening/closing loudly or the sound of cans being opened are enough to startle me. I’ve become scared of interacting with my friends but they miss the old me.

No. 479435

I graduated from NEET to advanced NEET by getting married and becoming a housewife. So far so good I think.

No. 479438

im so lonely, i cried about having no friends again today, i need to kill myself already, i dont think its ever going to get better

No. 479451

housewives aren't NEETS retard.

No. 479453

A NEET refers to anyone not employed, in school, or in training.

No. 479461

Hell yeah anon as long as it's healthy and fulfilling for you and yours!!

No. 479485

literally yes, but a lot of this thread is about hikkikomori tendancies and not just someone who doesn't work. if anon is able to function enough to do her housewife duties she's not a fucking neet.

No. 479490

is this a cope to feel accomplished since you haven't evolved from neetdom whatsoever

No. 479493

nta but probably yes, you're right.
Housewives are even worse because they pretend to do something. lol

No. 480313

File: 1572888646406.jpg (311.61 KB, 1080x1254, IMG_20191104_182634.jpg)

Reading things like this make me question why I'm even alive.
Do you know this situation, when you got asked (in school or at interviews) to name x good things about yourself but you genuinely can't come up with anything? There's not a single positive or even just ok trait about me, not the way I look, not anything about my personality, not anything regarding talent or skills. Absolutely everything about me is less than mediocre.

No. 480344

lol you sound like me a couple of years ago. However, now I feel way different about myself. Just because you feel like you aren't good at anything doesn't mean it's necessarily true.

Also remember most people in this world aren't particularly good at anything and they do just fine. There are plenty of below average people.

No. 480386

But it's not just that I feel like I'm not good, I know it, it's a fact. I'm not doing fine, I'm failing at everything.

No. 480396

I am so close to being a neet. I've been in university for like 5 years, I was supposed to graduate in 2018 but here I am, not graduating until 2021, if I can make it through my second attempt of the second year. I have an assignment that is worth 15% of my final grade that isn't getting done.

My parents forced me to go to university and I was lead to believe that I would enjoy it more than secondary school, I would meet people who understand me, I would learn to become a better person of myself. I never wanted to go to university to begin with, but I have no balls to just move out of my parents house and struggle with a minimum wage job, potentially having to share a house with a bunch of strangers who will likely stress me out even more.

To add to that, I lied that I was going onto the the final year of uni, when in fact, I have to repeat two modules of the second year. I'm supposed to be moving abroad in April, but now I'm trapped in a lie that I have been stuck in for months all because I wanted to get them off my back. not that it helped because every interaction I have with them is them stressing me out about how I can't fuck up my final year or they will beat me.

I've been dealing with depression since I was 13-14. I've had some counselling and I am currently going through cbt that I don't feel like is helping me.

My problem is that I have spent much of my life feeling horribly lonely and struggled to form relationships with anybody. I've never had any friends beyond being 11 and I am a complete social failure. I can't fathom the idea of anybody thinking I am a worthwhile person or anybody would want to talk to me. I have constantly had people make fun of me for being socially awkward and ugly, things I already believed about myself to be negative without anybody telling me anything.

I have never been able to relate with anybody, or trust anybody with my feelings. I avoid social situations as much as I can because it stresses me out so much to be presenting such a disgusting and vile representation of myself to the world. I person I would like to be is nothing like myself, and is proven to be unattainable since it would require me to completely change my personality and get a crap ton of plastic surgery to achieve it. I have trouble accepting myself and being comfortable in my skin and it has completely ruined my life.

I want from being a student who got really good grades to some retard who can't even focus in lectures, be punctual, look after my appearance. I'm just an irredeemable piece of shit that's too pussy to end everything.

I know nobody will read this, but I just wanted to express myself since I have so few chances to do so.

No. 480697

I'm in the same sitation, anon. I take way too long to graduate (that is if I don't fail completely), I had very high hopes for university life and was more than just disappointed. I often think of just running away and working some simple, stress-free minimum wage job for the rest of my life.
I also don't have friends and I don't think that will change anytime soon, people are simply majorly put off by me for some reason. And due to my previous experiences I'm also always paranoid about people laughing about me.
I've read this quite often already on lc, that some farmers were really good students when they were younger and then just fail? No idea why, but just the thought of having to study or do shit makes me feel sad, I have zero motivation to do anything but eat and be online. Feels like I've wasted me entire youth.
I'm sorry that I can't give you any advice. I've tried to get better for years already but it only got worse and worse.

No. 480701

this sucks and I'm sorry you're both in this situation. university shouldn't be for everyone and there should be no shame at all in choosing not to go, or in choosing to wait and go in later life if your feelings change.

is there something you'd like to do better, like a training course or apprenticeship or something?

there's no shame in dropping out of something you hate to do something you want to do.

No. 480713

I was NEET for a few years after dropping out of high school. Just this year I got my GED and started attending college. I was confident when the semester started but I keep getting more depressed and apathetic as the days go on. Anons I don't know what to do. I keep feeling like I don't belong in school but I've never had a real job before and idk what to do at 21 years old with no experience if not school. I'm not above working at McDonald's but obvi being a wage slave is not what I would want for the rest of my life. I just want to feel like a normal person.

No. 480745

I guess this is unnecessarily negative or whatever but I hate when other neets assume a mcjob will be easy when they're too mentally ill to handle school. I had a massive mental breakdown and quit my retail job cause the pressure was too much where at least in uni there are usually student services and people willing to help you out or extend your deadlines if you ask, minimum wage is just endless pressure and people screaming at you all day. Speaking as someone who dropped out of college and tried to work retail without fixing my mental problems, you might as well just stay in school as long as you can. It's only going to get worse without the structure that college provides.

No. 480750


Not negative, just realistic. Very necessary.

No. 480757

Now blame yourselves for being in that situation. Blame it on mental illness. Blame it on circumstance.

Just don't blame it on capitalism, because… stuff. If you question capitalism you must be a commie, and everybody hates commies. You're not a dirty commie, right? So capitalism rocks, and if your position in it sucks, it must be your fault, not capitalism's, right? Right. Everything is a-ok except you.

Now get yourself together and go make profit for some people you'll never meet while ruining our eco-system. That's the only way to earn a living and gain the respect of your parents and peers.

No. 480758

kys retard

No. 480760

Why? Elaborate pls.

No. 480802

File: 1573016031882.png (65.59 KB, 382x395, 1456269280609.png)

How do you find motivation be vaguely normie after living the NEET life for so long? It's been years and I still have zero desire for anything other than staying at home. Working is just something I do to get a weekend alone where I can do nothing. It's only gotten worse and I miss being alone more every day.

No. 480805


Maybe you’re an introvert? Who cares if you like to be alone. Who are you trying to impress?

No. 480870

Fuckin' A though

No. 481084

It just makes life feel unfulfilling I guess. There's nothing to look forward to except going home and being alone, and there's no way to have that without some 40-50 hour a week wageslave hell. It feels like I'm merely tolerating the majority of life to get a couple days of recharge time.

No. 481332

File: 1573163274106.jpg (200.94 KB, 599x676, id-love-to-have-a-bf_o_7251514…)

No. 481816

Monday will mark 3 weeks of beginning my recovery from neetdom. Ngl I feel I'm losing motivation and for the past 4 days or so I've contemplated skipping the exercise bike in favor of sleeping in. But I pushed through and biked every day, save 1 (I was too sore from a hike I did with friends so a good trade-off). Knowing that I did what I set out to do feels really good.
I think this is a good example of why sticking with baby steps is so important. It's only 30 minutes, I tell myself on those tough mornings.
I have started stretching afterwards since the hike. I think I will look up a 5-minute yoga routine to tack on to the end of my cycling since I haven't tried meditation yet and I need to stretch anyways.
This week I want to focus on all those things, as well as cutting down on weed consumption. If I don't stop smoking during the day, I'll never start my hobby again.
I do feel much better since starting my routine. My mom noticed too lol (really though it's a good feeling to know she feels better knowing that I'm working on myself and my depression).
The luster of this being new must be starting to wear off though because some ugly feelings have started to creep back in. God I want money and a life. Gotta stay diligent.
There's lots more but I'm gonna stop there.. Bless all you neets and former neets.

No. 481823


>How do you find motivation… It's been years and I still have zero desire for anything other than staying at home
>It just makes life feel unfulfilling… There's nothing to look forward to except going home and being alone
Sound like conflicting statements.
It sounds like you've found motivation to be a normie/social– the desire to mitigate the emptiness you're feeling.

Unless I'm misunderstanding your posts! It also seems like you might be asking how to cope with the fact that you have to work/be social for most of your week in order to earn time alone.
Are you cool with being alone or no?

No. 482234

My bad, I probably worded that poorly. Basically, how do you find enjoyment in normal stuff when you just want to be a NEET? I like being alone, but I realize to get my alone time I need to be somewhat of a normalfag to make money. I'd like to be at a good "balance" in life where I can enjoy my work life/normie conversations and have it not feel like a prison sentence.

No. 482484

File: 1573521478807.jpg (24.28 KB, 567x320, 1528572037342.jpg)

currently missing my neet life
my insomnia is back too
starting to dread my job every day despite it being a job i always wanted to do
thinking of quitting
my mental went boom lmao hoping this shit ends soon and i sort myself out

No. 482492

Can someone compile all the former NEET success stories into a single screenshot, I need it for motivational purposes

No. 484270

I was a NEET for two years after finishing my undergrad. I'm back at uni in a Master's course, I haven't taken a single day out "just because I was feeling bad", I'm a student rep, I arrange meet-ups outside of class, and I have two extracurricular hobbies that I'm staying active in.

And I'm fucking miserable. I love being around all these people, but keeping all these balls in the air is so difficult. Any time I screw up even mildly, I want to retreat inside myself, and my house is a disaster because it takes all my energy to keep up my outward life. It was so hard to stop being a NEET, but now part of me just wants to go back. I feel like this is all a charade, I still don't see any possibility of success in my future. How can I lose the NEET mindset even after I've left my room?

No. 484627

File: 1574127361976.jpg (979.07 KB, 1080x1543, 20191118_202744.jpg)

Out of all my neet treats, pic related is my worst, I also can't keep any studies, I'm not good with people.
Any form of knowing if my psychologist is scamming me?
He said I should get medicated but didn't mention what I have. It's my 6th setion so far and all he said is that I'm under too much pain to even take the bus and that I need something to ease my thoughts.

>Inb4 why don't ask directly?

I'm not good with people

No. 484629

psicologists cant medicate people though, in that case you would be refered to a psychiatrist and he/she is the one who will asses you.

How do you know if you are not being wrongfully medicated or scammed by the psychiatrist? ah, thats the more difficult question, you have to inestigate very well each prescription you are given, if for example you are prescribed Xanax for more than a few days, get the fuck out. That actually happened to me once, shrink lied about the alprazolam and prescribed it to me for indefinite amount of time, luckily i didn´t follow through after researching, otherwise i would have been made a junkie by my fucking doctor.

No. 484650

Big thanks, that is my biggest fear (to get a bad prescription). Yes he mentioned to ask a college classmate about me, a psychiatrist.

The inb4 was a mistake, I redid my comment and forgot to erase that. The inb4 was "why don't you directly ask what he thinks you have to prescribe you something?"

No. 484655


Its very tricky when so much of psychiatry truly is shooting in the dark and hoping to hit something. It is not as developed as other sciences and it involves trial and error to find the best dosages, best treatments for your case. Educate yourself pretty well and it should be okay.

In the case of Xanax (alprazolam) like i said, be careful, shit is dangerous, it is a highly addictive depressor that changes your brain chemistry and becomes addictive super fast, the drug makes you feel like shit but the withdrawals from not taking it can literally even kill you. I was not only prescibed those for way longer than it needed to be but the dosage was super high too, scary stuff.

No. 484744

I'm a former neet. I don't really understand how it happened, it's like I turned 25 then everything changed, and 7 months later I have a job I enjoy in a field I enjoy, a gf, money, time, hobbies, skills, and almost no depression or anxiety anymore.

No. 484760

congrats !! tell me your secrets, or at least what events happened to lead up to this situation. what field are you in ?

No. 484855

is this that frontal lobe development my mom keeps telling me about?

No. 484861

I'm a bit slow, sorry. It will probably take me about 5 years of introspection to fully understand how this happened lol. I'm finally just starting to figure my middle school self out. Why I was like that, why I wasn't like that, etc etc.

No. 484872

DUDE it happened to me too. Idk, I thought I was screwed forever. Being a teen/early 20s is so overrated. So much insecurity.

No. 484908

I know this is a joke but that shit was and still is wild to me. It feels different. Life is so much richer. I can pull my head out of my ass and notice the world around me! Frontal lobe development: 11/10 would do again. Makes life worth living again, makes you feel like a child again!!! But not without introspection and hard realizations and changes.

No. 484911

It's been 4 weeks and I'm still doing the exercise, eat, shower recovery routine! I'm feeling extremely better in many ways- socailly it's been much easier to commit and go to friend functions, I'm showered and ready to go outside my house every day so I can be more spontaneous than when I was in bed all day long, my thighs have gotten thinner, my mom and friends are happier seeing me be alright, I 'm sloooowly building a little confidence, and my mind is starting to crave other types of stimualtion , aka "the next step," which is reentering my hobby and hopefully making some income again. Stay strong to anyone who knows they are capable but have been hurt or abused or damaged along the way. It feels really fucking good to (start to) take the power back aNd grow.

No. 484912

It's been 4 weeks and I'm still doing the exercise, eat, shower recovery routine! I'm feeling extremely better in many ways- socailly it's been much easier to commit and go to friend functions, I'm showered and ready to go outside my house every day so I can be more spontaneous than when I was in bed all day long, my thighs have gotten thinner, my mom and friends are happier seeing me be alright, I 'm sloooowly building a little confidence, and my mind is starting to crave other types of stimualtion , aka "the next step," which is reentering my hobby and hopefully making some income again. Stay strong to anyone who knows they are capable but have been hurt or abused or damaged along the way. It feels really fucking good to (start to) take the power back aNd grow.

No. 485545

I know I'm an absolute piece of shit, but god damn I can't keep a job worth shit. I've only been able to get remote call center work that I don't keep for more than a couple months tops. The first one I took every hour off I could get and the second I quit as soon as we started taking calls. I found a new job a few months back that's freelance so I've just been working a few hours a week and I still can't keep up with it. I fucking hate talking to people non-stop. I need to make money so I can help with bills and save up for a car so I can get myself out of this rut and at least have options and go back to school or something but I'm such a worthless sack of shit I keep taking the easy way out and quitting. I have it so much better off than a lot of people and I'm really grateful but I fucking hate this job. If I encounter any setbacks I just fucking shut down and quit and cry. I'm sick of being a leech but I'm such a hypocrite when I take the easy route and quit. Like instead of just shutting up and logging into work I'm throwing myself a pity party as I sit here and cry and type this up to throw into the void of the internet.

No. 485772

Call center jobs (or anything that is mainly customer facing) suck ass. Any time I tried retail or call centers I wound up quitting almost immediately after training was over. The only way I managed to get out of my NEET rut was to get a manual labor job that didnt require me to talk to people aside from coworkers. Highly recommend it to any NEETs who want to start working but dread corporate bullshit or psycho customers. Plus being physical is good for you and makes you feel better, too.

No. 485964

What field are you in? I hate my office job and have always wanted to do something more physical.

No. 486052

Woops, forgot to sage my rage. Sorry!
I went back to work today and everything went OK even though my headset kept breaking in and out. Slowly crawling my way out of NEETdom!

Thanks for the advice anon! I'm curious what field you're in as well. Is it difficult as a woman?

No. 486338

I did way too much this week and last week and I had a neet breakdown about it yesterday. It doesn't help that my period started yesterday too. It's a good thing ultimately because I'm learning to deal with things and not shut completely down, but the growing pains suck. I need to refocus on getting up with intention in the morning and focusing on my workout. It's okay that this past week I took a few breaks and did easy workouts because the most important thing is that I get up and engage in my routine at all, but next week I want to pull back from social functions and refocus on it. Which works out perfectly because this Sunday is Friendsgiving so everyone will probably want to relax next week as well.
I'm nervous for Sunday because I want to be relaxed and go with the flow but I'm hosting and I don't-don't-do-fucking-not want to be agonizing for the next 3 days about what a pushy asshole I was at Friendsgiving, or what stupid shit I said, or something. Also I need to be easy on myself as I'm learning… no problem, right?
Good thing I am able to completely focus on myself and these extremely immature sounding neet problems. 2020 is it for me!!!

No. 486437

File: 1574549300731.png (653.07 KB, 1280x720, Kanesan armpits.png)

>I was a no fun allowed nerd, know it all kid in high school and didn't make any friends
>school was easy so I was able to graduate even without attending to classes
>develop the habit of being late to every activity, with the belief that it will be OK, like missing classes in high school without consequences
>college was hard because of this bad habit, depression and stunned social development so I end up dropping out
>2 years a NEET to get a job at a call center which is 2 hours bus ride from home this lasted 3 months then i quit, fuck this customer service shit and commute
>another 3 years as a shut in, feeling isolated with >tfw no bf feels all the time (Looking back, I think fondly of these years, regret nothing, perhaps not learning japanese)
>at 22 I start counting calories with MFP and taking spironolactone for my acne, I became really really cute
>get a job at another call center but this one is better because it is chats and is just 1 hour from home
>get 2 close friends and have fun at work gossiping and talking
>After 2 years I had to quit because I was getting burned out and my performance was bad
>Get job at another call center which has better conditions and is even closer to my place, I felt like it will be the start to better times
>a guy from new job asks me out and suddenly I'm roped into a relationship within 3 weeks of being there, we are a couple to everyone there,(other people comment how we are such a cute couple and shit)2 months into dating I find out he is married
>Don't know what to feel, first boyfriend ever and this happens so I continue the relationship because I didn't have an ounce of character and self respect
>after 1 month I quit job out of shame, but stayed with the guy (I suspect he has BPD and I can confirm he is a soulless bastard)
>get another job at a bank doing collections (great place, only 4 hours shift with better pay than others, I'm actually good at it get first place in performance most of the months)
>after about a year shit hits the fan when this guy out of the blue decides to tell his wife (who is a bigger doormat than I am because she was the breadwinner in the relationship, yes, when I quit he did as well to work at my place but he only lasted 4 months, the rest of the year he was a NEET with wife support) he tells her that he is dating me and asks for divorce, this guy is monkey branching thinking that I'm willing to support him
>he senses my surprise, doubt and the next day of the confession he backpedals goes back to his wife and ghosts me without any explanation, I'm left feeling worried (because he told me he wanted to kill himself the day before)rejected, abandoned, bamboozled, humiliated, angry etc.
>Manage life with deep pain and sorrow for 9 months, then he comes back full force, with lame shit that I know he has tried on other girls (I hacked his accounts) I reluctantly take him back because of his manipulations but also because I wanted an explanation, retribution, something. I was just spineless and fresh to the human interactions thing.
>¨date¨ officially for 3 months, 3 months of him being clingy as fuck, possessive, he introduced me to his mom, being a drama queen, wanted to live together; I gained 5kg, my acne came back because I stopped taking spiro (my blood pressure was off due to stress, I passed out in one occasion)
>he sees my state and nopes out, ends the relationship angrily because I didn't want to move in with him, which was great, I actually did want to break up but was afraid he would pour acid on my face or something
>I feel numb, I'm not feeling my feels so I'm more tired everyday, sleep a lot, 70% of my adherence is sick leave the rest is tardiness.
>I'm not able to process this fact; in my head this will all be OK just like it did in high school
>well no, and then I get sacked

I lost my job in April this year, for the past 8 months, I've been sleeping like 12 hours everyday, I shower once a week, I brush my teeth like every 3 days or so, I gained 10kg, but my acne is cleared because I started spiro again, tho.

What's funny is that I don't feel sad, perhaps I'm still numb, sometimes I feel like I'm not in my body, that it doesn't belong to me, I lost control, I can't to move it out of bed sometimes. But ever since the break up, I haven't cried, is like, I knew this was going to happen. I only cried the day I lost my job.

Today was a good day, I got up at 6:00 am, I counted calories and took 1 hour of sun for the first time in like 2 months.

I did research, I looked up the steps to maintain every system in the body healthy.
I'm starting with the skeletal system, daily habits to keep it healthy are, minerals, vitamins, sunshine and exercise, these are all proven to also raise serotonin and other feel good chemicals so I have some chances to cure my depression without giving my hard earned call center money to a psychologist.

I'm feeling hopeful, I watched Kuroko no Basuke and I remembered how sweet it is 2D, it also got me hyped. I will get hot again for my husbando and I will get a job to live and to buy wholesome husbando merch. I also want to learn japanese to be able to understand drama CDs and fully enjoy untranslated games like Ensemble Stars, I love idolshit, both 3D and 2D, I want to travel to Japan to see live shows from my favorite chika idols.

After all this time in call center, I'm confident into doing a good job, I'm actually eager to get a job and meet new people, I want to get girl-friends to roller skate, go on bike rides, visit tea places and cafes. I'm sure these kind of girls exist. I just need to lose weight before, I'm giving myself 2 months.(I can't leave the house being a fatty)

I wrote a schedule to keep the apartment clean and tidy for the month doing small tasks every day.

I also got a contact for mushroom farming classes, mushrooms are expensive and rare in my country and from what I have seen so far they are really easy to grow.

All this is in paper, I just need enough willpower to do it, that and control the time I spend online. The simplest job is the hardest.

I also need some kind of degree ASAP, I think(hope not) my country will fall to some kind of political uprising soon and/or the currency will be devaluated severely. I might need to immigrate or slave to live, send me good energies please.

Don't feel too nervous or inferior when talking to other people, even if they have different lives they also have insecurities; when I started socializing after being a NEET for 4 years people thought I was shy, aloof or stuck up, they never thought I was immature (or that is what I want to believe lol) in the end it doesn't matter, they live their lives and forget most interactions also opinions on people change over time.

Please be careful about the ¨love¨ thing, be mindful of your boundaries and don't try to please people just to make them like you, right now you are naive and you are letting the whole KV make you feel like a freak undeserving of love when is not the case, men sense this and they will try to take advantage of you (they wont care if you you are a KV, if you can offer company, please them or stroke their ego, they wont care). It really hurts to have your heart broken, be prepared.

No. 486440

File: 1574549701958.jpg (335.67 KB, 1332x1332, feelings-wheel.jpg)

Shit what an annoying wall of text, I hope someone can read it.

I wanted to add this tip. Since I'm bad at registering my feelings I grabbed this wheel of feelings.

When I get intrusive thoughts, I look at the wheel to see the one that matches, then I will know what I'm feeling and google how to process said feeling.

I also look at the antonym word of the feeling and see how and what I can do to feel the opposite.
It worked like a charm to get over the fact that the guy I was with started dating immediately after dumping me.

No. 486487

File: 1574563770964.jpg (767.47 KB, 2976x2387, 1566340295170.jpg)

Is there anyone else that plunged into NEETdom after a long time of being "normal"? I used to be a pretty ok 3 years ago, but then i got hit with an extremely bad bout of depression and anxiety due to suffering harassment at the hands of an abusive figure. Since then, i haven't felt the same amount of motivation or will to live. I feel like I'm a completely different person that can't adhere to deadlines, jobs or anything else. I think the best way i can describe it is like running at the speed of a train, but getting hit with a sack of bricks by a completely random person. Your face is completely shattered, but you're left to pick up the pieces.

How do you cope with self-sabotaging yourself? I constantly find myself unable to get things done because of the extreme shame from having fallen from grace, I'm overwhelmed with feelings of "what gives" and of never being able to achieve normality again. It feels like everything is a reminder of how much you've been downgraded. My life has been a complete and utter standstill for about 3 years, and I'm just tired. I don't want to be a NEET anymore, but it feels as if there's something inside me pulling me away.

No. 486499

Landscaping! It wasn't too hard to get into as a woman specifically, but I did have experience as a farmhand before which might've helped. The work itself is dirty of course but I've never run into anything requiring so much strength that I couldn't do it alone, although I almost always work with other people.

No. 486537

I can relate to this
>dropped out of public school in middle school for online classes
>gained over 100 pounds in 5 years
>no drivers license

While I've done some things to improve myself over the past year or so. I've lost 40 pounds and got my permit last month.
Upcoming 2 year anniversary with bf. Gone to Europe 2 times in past year to see said boyfriend leaving country for the first time ever. Trying to do some money online.

I'm a few classes away from graduating with my associates. But can't make the effort because would have to move from online classes to moving to in person classes which are two hours away.
So I would have to move there for a semester.

I dunno if I should waste more student loan debt for something I might not even use. I'm scared to have a job as I tried doing a call center back in 2017 but quit after 3 days. I'm stuck in a rural area that needs a car.

No. 486651

This is so cool and smart anon. I like how straight forward you are. Thanks so much for the tip! Sending my good energies your way!

No. 486652

Samefag but lol I'm feeling…
>out of control

No. 486653

Samefag but lol I'm feeling…
>out of control

No. 486679

Do you have access to free therapy or are you american? CBT can help you find your will again and get you on your feet.

No. 490735

Any tips on how to prevent myself from becoming a NEET? I'm 16 and not one just yet but Im seriously worried that's the life I'm headed for.(underage)

No. 490748

Work in school, think about what you want to do with your life, plan ahead. Socialize with your peers and teachers if they're worth it, stay out of drama. Try new things, stay curious. You'll be fine if you limit your screen time.

And enjoy your ban.

No. 490759

Planning is key. Make detailed plans of what you are going to do after high school etc.

No. 490798

For prior context, this is my post >>472195
I'm thinking about applying for college again next year. 2020 will be five years since I last tried going. Would it be dumb to study theatre? I don't really care about my ~career I just need to do something with my life and I figure I might as well do something enjoyable while trying to ascend to normiehood. College is cheap or free where I live and I think I'm entitled to the free tier. Plus, it's something that involves working and interacting closely with other people so I think it could be therapeutic and confidence building in a way that business or psychology wouldn't. I don't care if I end up waitressing or whatever after I graduate, I just want to be able to interact with people without fear.

idk if you're still lurking underage b&-chan but get a part time job. That's the thing I regret not doing the most about my teen years. Everyone I know who is a well adjusted, stable late 20s - early 30s adult worked after school or during summer break, even if they didn't do well in school.

No. 490817

seconding this, underage-chan. I'm 22 and all my ~16 year old coworkers are so much more outgoing and well-adjusted than I was at that age because all I did was watch YouTube and play vidya. Plus being able to spend and save your own money is great and gives you a sense of independence. You can always quit if it gets to be too much.

No. 490854

it sucks to realize that ive wasted my 16-20s being a complete loser neet. i even ruined my chances at a good college, i had a good SAT score and gpa and just left college after a week and have been working a shitty part time retail job since, with no friends, no family besides my insane mom, no hobbies. i make below the poverty level and barely make ends meet, and it's literally entirely my fault for squandering my chances thanks to neetdom and depression. I know it sounds elitist, but I finally enrolled myself in community college but I feel so ashamed of it, at one point I had such high hopes and goals. I sabotaged my entire life course due to laziness and sadness. I'm still only 20 but I feel so out of touch with my age group and feel like I'm so behind in life and will never catch up, or even worse just end up failing myself even more.

No. 490925

oh my gosh anon. please relax. you’re literally only 20 years old!!! you have an entire lifetime ahead of you to put new pieces of your life into the puzzle. that sounds so stupid but i don’t care honestly, you’re going to be fine. community college can be fucking awesome depending on where you go/what you’re studying. there’s no shame in previously dropping out; if it wasn’t for you or you weren’t ready, join the club, it happens to people every day and it doesn’t say anything remotely negative about you. the fact that you’re trying again speaks volumes, because the easier option would be to let the depression consume you. but you’re taking the right steps and fighting that shit and i’m proud of you

No. 490941

you have a part time job and taking classes, you're not a neet by definition. not having friends/social life or a "good" job or going to a "good" school doesn't make you a neet. snap out of the defeatist mindset.

No. 490972

I was in the same situation, anon, except it took me til I was 23 to get my shit together. Honestly, a more relaxed college environment might be really good - especially if you're pursuing a field where it's not necessarily about academic standing but mostly about practical skills you learn, like communication. Less stress makes it easier to stick to things!

You're also probably still going to be one of the younger people in your classes, as well. A lot of people can't afford to go to post secondary until later in life, or like you they're on their second or more time trying the college thing out.

It can be super discouraging to feel like you're behind the rest of the people you know, but what matters is that you have a plan and are getting things on track now. Look at your personal improvements and don't compare yourself to others so hard.

You'll hit 25 and realize that you're still a baby at 20 and that you were fretting over nothing. I believe in you, anon!

No. 491501

I'm the original anon who posted this, thank you for your replies and encouragement. I don't mean to be cheesy but it means a lot to me, especially since I don't know any of you personally even. And the anon about me having a defeatist mindset is right, I tend to sabotage things for me before they get good so then I can wallow in the sadness about it. Thank you all so much and for the great advice, I appreciate it. I haven't started community college yet (starting in the spring semester) but I will stick with it and not sabotage it like I have other things. thank you all again.

No. 492913

Technically this belongs in the advice thread, but I feel like people here would understand my problem better:

Last year I spent New Year's Eve driving around for hours (hoping I wouldn't die in an accident due to bad weather), because I neither had anybody to spend the evening with nor was I able to stay at home because I can't have my parents know just how big of a loser I am.

Last weekend I met up with old friends and one of them asked me, whether I want to come to her house on NYE. Sounds good at first, right?
But the only people I know will be her and another friend of ours. The other guests are that friend's old af bf whom I only met once and a few "buddies" of the host. I have really bad social anxiety, I absolutely hate having to be around strangers, I'm so awkward, I absolutely can't talk to people - expecially if they're men. To make it worse, another friend revealed to me that my friend is actually fucking one of her buddies, so now I'm super scared that once everybody is drunk and the clock strikes midnight both of my friends will just make out with their men and I will be sitting there with nobody to talk to.
Plus, her house is more than 2 hours away, meaning I would have to sleep there and couldn't just leave whenever I wanted.

What should I do? I know that I need to do stuff like this to practice being more socially active, but I feel sick just thinking about it. No matter how hard I try, I always have a rbf and can't open my mouth for the love of god… And it's not like I made any friends whenever I forced myself to socialize either (especially seeing how far away that party is), I would be basically suffering for nothing. I really tried in the past, but despite of what people told me, I absolutely never enjoyed myself when going out or at parties, I'm always only waiting for it to be over.
I hate this so much, the fact that I'm always scared of what to do on NYE keeps ruining Christmas for me, for the past 8 years already. I can't wait for when I have my own place and can just stay in.

No. 492923

Why are you acting like the world is going to end if you stay home for one day?

No. 492931

I still live with my parents, so if I stayed at home on NYE they would question why and then I'd have to admit that I don't have plans because I basically don't have any friends and knowing that would make them feel very disappointed (or they'd get angry at me). They obviously already know that I'm somewhat of a recluse, but until now they have no idea how bad my situation really is. Not having friends is definitely one of the saddest and most embarrassing things out there, so knowing that their daughter is this pathetic would break my parents' heart - and I don't want to do that to them.

No. 492943

pretend you're sick.

No. 492957

Either don't go and wallow in self pity, loneliness and shame, like you seem to be already ready to do, or go and worst case scenario just spend the evening on your phone. As you said you will solve ansolutely none of your issues with anxiety and social interactions if you don't make efforts for it, and at least if you make the decision clearly you're not going to be thinking about what you're going to do during Christmas.

No. 492961

It sounds like not having friends causes you to feel a lot of shame and pain but please know that it's not inherently shameful. Also, you're not pathetic, you just seem lost which just happens to a lot of people. I don't know what causes you to put yourself down like that but you're fine, okay? You seem to have some demons and try really hard, too hard to please your parents and/or some figment of really fixed, unforgiving, harsh expectations. I'm sure there are reasons for this but fuck your social life doesn't affect them and concern them this much. You're more concerned with their opinion of you or their reaction than your own well-being. That's a red flag.

If it's a two hour drive and you're gonna feel trapped staying the night, don't go. Thank your old friend for the invitation and tell her you can't make it. Maybe even go as far as explaining why. These are just ideas and recommondations. You could say: I'd love to come and thank you so much for the invitation, it really means a lot but staying at an unfamiliar place all night would be very stressful and hard for me at the moment. I thought long and hard about it but I find it's best for me to skip this time. But I was really happy about your invitation. Or just say that sadly you can't make it but that you really tried (because you did) and that it means a lot. Or something in a similar vein if that helps.

It's healthy to wish for friendships and for improvement of struggles. But beating yourself up over it doesn't help. That's not healthy and most importantly, you don't deserve it! You deserve to be treated fairly with respect and patience and positivity.
pulling the sick card is perfectly fine and enough explanation. good call.

Even parental worrying can become overbearing and bad at some point even if the intent is well-meaning. Should your parents put you down about it or tease you or be overly disappointed in you and make you feel guilty, please view their behavior more critically.

Don't give up, I believe in you, anon.

No. 492968

>wallow in self pity, loneliness and shame
>worst case evening spent on your phone
I don't think you understand social anxiety, let alone how to fix it

No. 492972

I'm trying to recover but today I feel like such a fucking loser. It sucks.

No. 493103

recovery happens a day at a time, don't be so down on yourself anon.

No. 493468

you fix social anxiety by being social, isn't that how it works?

No. 493763

i dont know if I want to laugh or punch you in the throat

No. 494268

NTAYRT but she's right. The only way to overcome it is to put yourself into social situations. However a party sounds like it'd be too much for you right now and you are completely justified in not wanting to go. I think it's great you rekindled an old friendship and you can just hang out with her some other time!
I also agree with the other anons and you should just play the sick card with your parents. If they pry, just be upfront and say you were invited but you feel unwell. Technically, it really isn't even lying lol.
(Sorry if you weren't looking for anymore input on this!!)

No. 499831

heya im a neet, but im soon gonna be out of this neet life. Im currently looking for jobs and work, by the end of 2019 i will be finally working somewhere, and get my life together.

No. 499875

Good luck anon!

No. 499881

File: 1577841241467.jpg (41.98 KB, 583x509, 1536828560402.jpg)

Here's to a productive 2020 anons! May all our neet recovery related resolutions go according to plan!

You can do it!

This thread got bumped on NYE and I remembered your post. What did you end up doing out of curiosity? Hope you're doing okay.

No. 500033

Thank you for asking, anon! (tho I planned to do an "update" anyway lol)

I went because I knew that I just had to, but I'm so glad it's over.
Beforehand I was so scared that my entire body was shaking. My friend's friends were nice, so it was okay, but nevertheless I was just sitting around silently, because I just have no idea how to contribute to conversations. We played some drinking game nearly the entire evening, about which dirty things we've done already, so of course I had to lie constantly to not out myself as the virgin loser I really am.

When some of the guests left and only the ones who wanted to sleep over stayed, I also noticed that my friend's secret fuckbuddy wasn't leaving either - despite stating so earlier. Problem was, I was sleeping in my friend's room, which wasn't connected to the floor itself. Instead you had to walk through another bedroom, the one she took for that night. So, when everybody else went to bed and that guy was still around, I just knew that they would sleep in that room together. And I was right, since her house is very old, so I could clearly hear his voice from that room. I didn't hear any sex noises, but you can never know…
When I woke up early in the morning I had to pee, but obviously also didn't want to enter the room they slept in, so instead I laid awake for 3 hours…
Does my friend think I'm dumb enough to not notice the way they look at each other, that he tries to touch her, that I could hear them? Or did she want me to find out that way? I'm also a little hurt that she repeatedly lied about not dating him. If you fuck him, then he's not just your bestie like you always claim.
After breakfast they also cuddled a little. It was just them and another couple left, I felt so uncomfortable, I just wanted to leave (and finally could, after another 2 hours of awkwardness).

I guess my wish for 2020 is to lose weight and become attractive enough to find a kind bf through online dating or apps, so that I can just leech off him when it comes to friends. My dream was always to find good and reliable female friends, but it seems that this is impossible. All the girls I met always put guys before friends. Maybe it's because I live in a very rural area, but I got the impression that it's more common in bigger cities to still be single in your 20s and to also do things without your partner. I feel like I've been third wheeling since I was just 16.

No. 500035

Samefag, but maybe to clarify a little bit: I've been writing "friend" the entire time, so you might wonder why I post in the neet thread:
I saw this girl 5 times this year, but before that we didn't see each other 2 years in a row.
And it's the same with all my other friends too. I don't have many to begin with (zero in university), and I see them usually only once (or less) per year, meaning that the past years I sometimes went out as little as one time per year, meaning despite technically having "friends" I still feel very lonely. All of them have other friends and/or live far away, so I'm definitely far from their number one priority. I only sometimes text them, what they're doing and sometimes they just stop replying after a while, so it's not like I really have somebody to talk with about my problems. I also haven't seen my former best friend in 2 years and she didn't even bother telling me that she went to study abroad.

No. 500064

I turned 21 and am starting college in 5 days. I'm the first woman to go to college in my family; the youngest as well. My dad was the first who got his degree in his mid-40s because the company paid. My family is staunchly religious, poorly educated. They live on farms and in single room cabins, to give an idea. No one supports me, my mother has put me down numerous times on my ability to pass (as well as in high school and my hobbies). I've felt so stupid and incapable my whole life, raised to be a housewife, told that's all I'm good for, despite how high my aspirations are. I'm scared shitless, but I'm also ready. Good luck to all of my other anon friends. Much love; Happy New Year!

No. 500105

i wish you the best of luck anon! 'grats on being not only the youngest in your family to pursue higher education, but also the first woman!

don't listen to your family. i'm not gonna shit on them bc they obviously didn't get the chance to aim higher so it's somewhat understandable that they're so close-minded and judgemental, but their backwards thinking shouldn't bring you down, esp your mother. the fact that you're getting the chance to do this at all proves you've got what it takes. don't pressure yourself; college is hard for everyone and you don't need to be some superwoman.

you're built for more than just being a housewife and serving a man. even if that's what you end up choosing after you get your degree, it's still YOUR choice anon. good luck in college!! i hope you do amazingly.

No. 500106

>I guess my wish for 2020 is to lose weight and become attractive enough to find a kind bf through online dating or apps, so that I can just leech off him when it comes to friends.
Wowww this always ends up great lmao.

No. 500238

Is that sarcasm…?
Doing that is simply my only option or hope at this point.

No. 500539

It's okay to say no to things. You had genuine good reasons not to go to this event. That's okay. But you did go, and you now you can use it as a learning experience. Recovering from neetdom doesn't mean you need to unnecessarily put yourself through things you find unpleasant or become a normie. For me, it means that I want to become functional, self sufficient and able to interact with the outside world. I'm so extremely introverted that I know I would be unhappy with a full on normie lifestyle but I don't want to stagnate in my childhood bedroom until I die either.
Like, when you needed to pee for instance; even if they were having sex, and you walked in on them, so what? You couldn't avoid going through the room. It wouldn't have been your fault and I doubt anyone would have been mad at you. Embarrassed maybe, but not mad. Especially if the room was quiet like you say. And if you had walked in on them it would have been be a funny story you could tell during a drinking game or something in the future and it would be something that really happened.
Being a neet doesn't mean you can't have friends, it just means you aren't in education, employment or training. a lot of adults only see some friends a few times a year or even less, especially if they live a few hours away. they aren't "close" friends and that's okay but that doesn't mean the relationship isn't important. I get that you want closer friends, but don't neglect this friendship. Try and do something together in 2020 at some point. I had non close friendships that I let slip because I was ashamed of my pathetic life and now I have no one to text or hang out with at all.
I also don't think finding a bf to leech off of is a good idea. girls in our position are vulnerable. A lot of the men who would date someone like us probably like the idea of someone who is sort of helpless relying on them and would take advantage of that. I think developing yourself and getting fit is a great idea, but don't do it to get a bf, do it for yourself. I'm not saying stay celibate forever but be careful. Is bumble popular where you live? That has a function for finding female friends. I think that might a good idea for you. I hope 2020 is good for you anon.

No. 500543

why not just find hobby's instead?

No. 500565

Are their any careers that don't require college that pay decently?

No. 500595

Been a NEET for 6 months. Meeting with a military recruiter tomorrow to get my career started.

No. 500608

crime scene cleanup

No. 500709

just stay home and be a neet, not a psycho bitch killer

No. 500711

So you applied to be a bullet buffer for your country that didn’t support you with mental health up to this point and fell pray to a human pound


No. 500724

The military is evil.

No. 500726

You'll heavily regret it, anon. Rape is extremely common in the military.

No. 500790

Replies are retarded. If you are in the USA and are not applying for combat, it's a good way to get a place to stay , save up some funds, and get cheaper education (sometimes free). Do what you have to do anon. Congrats on getting out of the house.

No. 500800

Good for you for getting out. Try to get into intelligence.

No. 500804

File: 1578080286548.jpeg (115.85 KB, 640x872, 72F6FEDF-B488-496C-A050-C5486A…)

(If American): Do you enjoy being a pawn in the games of rich war profiteers like Dick Cheney? You could get your legs blown off so shareholders in Haliburton get a bigger dividend.

The reason why the benefits are so great is because the job is garbage.

No. 500806

See >>500709
Even if you won't be killing babies directly you'll still be providing support for those that do.

No. 500807

great way to get assaulted too!

No. 500814

As a woman, you're unlikely to get your legs blown off. Those rape statistics tho…

No. 500820

going to basic training for the army broke my neetdom cycle. I didn't wind up graduating but I finally got a normal job when I got back. plus I was in the best shape of my life.

people are replying "reeee fuck the military" and they're right but you also probably aren't in the mindset to give a shit. I know I wasn't. Good luck anon, I hope you don't wind up regretting it. Sign the shortest contract they'll give you and make sure you accept the GI bill when they offer it to you. save every penny of your money.

No. 500943

trades, some trades can get you 150k a year if you can get 60 hours a week from the overtime, and thats not including benefits

No. 500945

also i meant starting out you can get 150k, some specialty skill can get you 500k if you're the best in your area

No. 501008

I was the military anon and wow, didn't expect so many replies lol.

I'm leaning towards intelligence. Not joining the marines nor doing combat >>500800 >>500790
>>500820 Most likely gonna sign a 6year contract because I wanna be a linguist. I appreciate your advice. I can't really see myself doing anything else right now.

No. 501011

enjoy WWIII

No. 501181

Unless you are in combat, it is unlikely you'll suffer any of the things you just mentioned.

Rape is a possibility, but I've already been raped as a civilian twice, and if I needed to get out of the house immediately, the military would be one of the fastest options. Not all of us qualify for other programs.

No. 501391

I've been a neet for over 2 years. I used to work for my Aunt as a receptionist, but she downsized her business and didn't need me anymore. I have a bachelor of science in human resource development, a previous HR internship and two other previous office jobs. My resume is polished and I've been through coaching with multiple recruiters and my old college's career services center. I am a 25 year old woman with no social media, no IRL friends and bad social skills. I have been trying really hard, lately, though. My Aunt is even letting me lie about still working for her to hopefully make my resume look more attractive to prospective employers, but it isn't going well. I am GREAT at getting the initial interview for the jobs I am applying for (data entry, hr internship/hr assistant, telemarketing) but once I get past the phone screen and they get to know me I am rejected, even if I am overqualified for the position on paper. I think it is my personality. I am bad at projecting confident body language and seeming like a good candidate. I project the image of a stupid, uncertain woman that would be a pain to have around. The funny thing is that I briefly worked at a place that taught job-seeking strategies and interview etiquette to people with autism and even helped teach the class and mentor them. But I can't even get a job, myself. It's like I know everything on paper that I am supposed to do but in practice I just fail. I just feel really bad lately and hopeless. It's like I was on this upward escalator to getting an ok-job and being normal but then I graduated and my internship ended and my life was over. I spend all day applying to jobs I will never get, talking to people on a shutin discord server and drinking. I honestly hate my life

No. 501450

You need to do practice interviews with someone I think. To me an interview is like acting, if you dont have that type of personality that's a natural at the job, you're putting on a little theatre.

No. 501569

Not sure if this should go in the career thread, but how the hell do I find a job that is good for solitary people like me? My social skills are fine but I'm happiest when I spend most my time alone.

I finally got my degree in math after putting off graduating and being NEET for a few years, but I'm still not sure what to do. I can do technical stuff but it's imperative I do something where contact with other people is limited.

No. 501571

You and me both anon. I currently have a well paying job and my work mates are okay but I absolutely hate spending time together in the office. I'd rather be paid less and work alone. I'm seriously drained when I spend more than 3 hours with someone, let alone 8 hours per day of the workweek. I've tried freelancing but it's not a stable income and I still like stability.

No. 501642

So ex-NEETs and other NEETs, why shouldn't I become a NEET? How bad is it living off rich parents and doing nothing for the rest of my life? It sounds like paradise to me. I can game and watch tv comfortably until I die and not face any stress or worry.

No. 501644

do you have rich parents? most neets dont

No. 501885

I'm a neet because I'm mentally ill. My parents are working class and hate my guts -partially because I'm a disappointment and a leech, partially because they've always been abusive to the point that hating me has been their default setting since I was a baby. I don't enjoy gaming or watching tv that much, I only take part in them because they're low investment hobbies I can do from my bedroom. I face stress and worry about my future and my physical/mental health on a daily basis. I have no friends, have never had a romantic relationship and am extremely lonely. I turn 30 this year and suicide is looking more and more tempting with every day. It's shit.

No. 501963

Holy shit I can relate and I'm only 19,I never had friends,currently jobless,regularly cynical and depressed,verbally abusive dad who wants me dead, whole family doesn't give a shit about me due to my inevitable tbi I had as a baby which makes me function differently than other people doesn't help that I'm the only introvert in my family

No. 501965

Please don't kill yourself anon, I'm close to your age and my situation is similar. We're gonna make it anon I promise!

No. 501986

stay strong anon

No. 502005

Most people inevitably get insanely bored from it, call it depression, then use that as a reason to never go anywhere or improve their life, and stay miserable forever. Most places online where NEETs gather reflect that, very few remain happy long-term in that lifestyle unless they are highly self-motivated to continuously build skills and engage in productive and exciting hobbies that bring fulfillment, but most NEETs are NEETs specifically because they are the opposite of that personality type.

No. 502037

(Mostly) recovered NEET, now a first year uni student at 23 (dropped out first time around after a mental breakdown, spent some years NEETing, in a drugged haze and doing part time work).
Problem is, I'm still a virgin I feel like I lost the time I should have been getting relationship experience to NEETdom and depression, and I feel hopelessly immature in that area and feel so ashamed. I'm not looking for anything major, just some experience, a casual relationship.
I'm having a lot trouble finding people I'd be open to dating, because most men around me are 4/5 years younger. I've made some friends around my age, but no one I'm the slightest bit attracted to. I don't want to try online dating, because I can't tell I'm attracted to someone without meeting them in person. Not into clubbing either.
Any ex-NEETS have a similar story? Tips on just getting out there and meeting people?

No. 502039

You need a change to your routine, something that will get you out of the house on a regular basis, but not TOO shocking a change that you can't cope - having nothing to do all day is poison and it's so hard to lift yourself out of that state.
Volunteer work maybe? Is there any government help you could get, training courses you could go on?

No. 502047

Because normal people with a conscience and a sense of shame would feel guilty and embarassed leeching off their parents without even attempting to become independent.

The NEET life is my dream, I just call it early retirement because I plan to pay for it myself.

No. 502079

kind of similar, but not helpful in anyway, i was a shut-in neet with 1.7 high school gpa until 23 before realizing i wasn't a fat, ugly, retard, i was just overweight and an alcoholic full of self hatred. i started learning trade skills and try to join union apprenticeships at the recommendation of a family member, so i applied myself worked hard and now here i am making 150k a year with great benefits at 26 and dangerously close to suicide and still never kissed anyone

No. 502093

That sucks anon.
I'm poor as shit, but haven't been depressed for almost 2 years now - I'm the person you're replying to, so I'm romantically in the same place (well, I've BEEN kissed, but not by anyone I'd want), and it worries me, but overall I'm genuinely happy.
Do you work out? Running was a big part of the key to getting out of depression. I was bordering a BMI of 30 when I started, and while it certainly helped my physical health, the mental health benefit to my mood was the bigger positive.
Literally just this morning, I was feeling awful (PMS + external stress factors piled up), and while I'm supposed to be revising for exams, I have nothing scheduled I have to show up for, so I was very tempted for the first time in ages to go back to old bad habits and spend the day basically browsing the internet in bed. Instead, I dragged myself to go for a run instead, instantly felt in a good mood after. Doesn't have to be running, just something that gives you that endorphin boost.

That's the difference between being depressed and not - the facts of your situation can be the same, the problems can be the same, but when you're depressed you just see things differently. Things that I can brush off now paralysed me when depressed. I used to want to hide in my room or end it with every setback, now my immediate response is "how can I deal with this?"
And depression fucks with your head, you forget that it's not normal to feel like shit, you forget what it's like to not just want it to end - so remember that whatever you feel right now, you may not get what you want, but as long as you're alive it's possible to be happy overall.

No. 502148

I'm 25, and have never had a job. GED, finished trade school at 20 but got caught up in an abusive relationship for way too long. How does one explain NEET-dom to a future employer? I feel so hopeless because I have almost no resume. It's so embarassing to explain to friends. Probably not even a gas station would hire me. Everyone always says "lie on your resume" but what does that even mean. I just want to be normal.

My parents always made fun of "burger flipping" jobs, and expected me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I'm too autistic for any of that. Working with animals is my dream, thinking of looking into freelance video editing like an anon earlier mentioned.

No. 502282

thanks for the commiserations and advice kind anons. I'm going to be stuck at my parents' house for at least another year so I need to come up with something to keep me sane. I'm thinking of going to my country's equivalent of community college to study an old hobby but that won't start up until late august. Getting back into volunteering was one of my resolutions this year. I did it before and found it a little overwhelming but I was in school full time back then. I've been thinking about becoming a rape crisis volunteer, but given my own issues that might be more of a long term goal. Maybe something with kids would be a better fit. There are actually a lot of volunteering opportunities where I live because the economy is so shit lmao.

you should see if there's somewhere near you where you can volunteer with animals anon! At the place I used to volunteer there was a girl who came in 30 hours a week and they eventually just gave her a paid job. It would be something in your area of interest to go on your resume at least. I know of people who made up fake old jobs and had a friend or family member with a different last name as a reference. My work history is extremely spotty to say the least, but I have good references from volunteering that will be useful if I recover enough to work again.

No. 502322

As crazy as it sounds, the only way I can escape impending neetdom is if I quit university and move out of my parents house and get a full time minimum wage job. Is it worth it?

No. 502434

No. Continue your education. Getting a good job will be mountains easier, and you are not really doing bad if you are currently in university. Education is extremely important to having a successful career. Any job you get now will end up being a large life path, do you want to be stuck there and regretting you gave up the chance of an actual career? You should appreciate living with your parents now. Don't take what you have for granted, doesn't matter your age.

No. 502804

Hey, any suggestions?

No. 503204

This is mostly a rant but if anybody has advice I'd really appreciate it.

I'm 26 and I've never had a job. I guess I'm not technically a NEET because I've been in college for most of my adult life, except for late 2015-late 2017. However, I've been at community college the entire time and have yet to complete an associate's. I've tried 3 different majors and I've had to take a lot of remedial math for my most recent major which is why it's taken so long. A good chunk of this has been full time, but since last Spring it's been part time just because I already have my gen eds taken care of therefore and can only take a couple classes at once. This is my last semester there and I will be finally graduating with my associate's this May. My grades are good and I genuinely enjoy what I study. Thankfully I don't have any debt because I've been lucky enough to get a free ride due to financial aid, although that will be running out in a couple more semesters.

I just feel bad because I could have (and should have) been working for pretty much the whole time. My parents just never really forced me to get a job and I wish they did so I could have gotten it over with a long time ago. I don't have a car and public transportation here is complete trash so actually getting somewhere more than once a week is a bit of a hassle (semi rural area.) I have a little bit of volunteer work (like literally 2 days) which is better than nothing I guess but it hasn't been enough for the few jobs I've applied for recently.

I know I need to just apply more and eventually I'll get something. I just feel so embarrassed. I know I'll feel better once I get a job, but I absolutely dread the thought of going into an interview and being asked why I've been useless for nearly a decade. I dread that my only methods of getting to work would be getting dropped off and picked up by my mom or walking/taking the bus for 2 hours (round trip.) Being able to get a car would make things so much better but I need money first obviously. I know I'm just making excuses and I need to stop and just do it and get over it. But that's easier said than done, for me at least.

My parents are very great and I feel terrible for being a leech for so long. They understand that the job market is shit and entry level jobs pay nothing. They understand that it's difficult even when you get a degree. I just want to move out and let them be on their own. I just want to be normal and feel like an adult instead of a slightly older teenager.

No. 503247

Ok I'm not sure how college works in the US but is it possible for you to do an internship before/after you graduate ? You didn't mention it so I assume you never did one. It looks like you need the work experience more than the money so you can do an unpaid internship (easier to be hired) in your field of study and if you're really lucky they'll keep you, if not it's still experience.
If you can't do an internship, try to do more volunteer work before you graduate.
Be prepared to answer in an interview why you didn't work before. Lots of people were in the same situation as you, search online you'll probably find a good answer. Make something up if you have to.
Either way, it's going to be difficult without a car but not impossible ! I know right now everything is stressful but you'll make it anon I'm rooting for you

No. 503257

It doesn't matter, i'm going to fail university because i'm stuck in a shitty course I can't change and I am out of money. This is all because my parents wouldn't let me take some time off school and work on my depression, well thanks to the parents who caused my depression and ruined my finances, I am going to likely never get a career even if i wanted too.

No. 503268

Once I transfer to a 4-year university internships will be possible and I'll 100% look into them.

Thank you so very much for your reply, it was very helpful and encouraging!

No. 503369

Look at places within walking distance and apply to them first. An hour of walking there and an hour of walking back actually isn't as bad as it sounds, especially if you listen to some music or something while you walk.

>entry level jobs pay nothing

Having no job pays nothing, so if entry level is what you can get, take it. Everybody starts somewhere and most of us start off somewhere shit. After my degree, I ended up working retail for nine months. Some money is better than no money and, when you have zero experience, beggars can't be choosers.

When people ask why you haven't worked, say "I was working on my education and was lucky enough to be able to focus on my studies, but now I'm ready to dive into the practical side of things in a professional working environment." It shuts down further questioning, shows you want to work and it shows confidence because you're showing that you're aware it's not the norm but that you don't think it'll set you back. If you answer in a nervous or embarrassed way, it'll rub off on the interviewers and they'll see it as an embarrassing thing.

Compile excellent references. Any teachers that are pleased with your work, any family friends in professional careers, any fellow volunteers. Ask them for a written reference. Photocopy and have these on hand for interviews. A file of people that believe in you can do wonders.

No. 503399

I understand your frustration but speaking from my own experience taking time of school for me made my depression worse and now I don't think I'll ever be able to re-enroll and it feels bad man.

Are you seeking tutoring or speaking to your professor?

No. 503401

blaming your parents for everything when you’re a grown ass adult is honestly bullshit. take some responsibility for yourself. nobody is obligated to house your NEET ass for free.

No. 503418

How about you read my first post? I know that, anons here are insisting that I continue to live with my parents.

No. 513998

I want to stop being a neet. Whats preventing me from going outside is my body dysphoria. I gained weight and i feel so fucking depressed. I hate it.

No. 514091

Do you have a job or any sort of employment ?

No. 520215

I know I'm a bit late to the party on this, but Jesus dudes, just lie on your resume. Say you worked as a home aid or a house worker for your parents or some shit and then list them as your work reference.

No. 520217

And how do you phrase it?

No. 520276

NTA, but there are a lot of different things you could say, depending on the skills you want to highlight. I'd put emphasis on organization and attention to detail, like managing schedules, helping to write out checks/pay bills, etc. You probably do a lot of those things anyway.

If you don't have work experience, it's not a bad idea to embellish, especially if your parents will be a reference for you. Restaurant/retail jobs might not even check your references, but it does look better to have some kind of experience doing something.

No. 520334

I'm one of those anons. I have voluntary work and temporary work placements/internships on my resume that are worded to sound like they were legit jobs, and I have good references from those places. one of my references is a supportive family member and I have no doubt she would make me sound great. Mental illness is my main problem.

No. 533092

File: 1585368667140.jpg (55.33 KB, 680x571, 1585361005512.jpg)

No. 533585

I’m back to being a NEET after getting fired, except this time I’m not a broke NEET if I keep my spending habits to a bare minimum.

I was planning to save my tax return money to pay off college debt so I can get back to school in time for the summer semester but now I gotta put that into a savings account which I don’t have yet. I will get severance checks which I’ll use to pay off other bills (mainly cell) but idk if I’ll qualify for unemployment or that $1200 bill Trump just confirmed for.

I thought I escaped the NEET life but it came back to haunt me…

No. 533638

anon 3 billion people are neets right along side you now, you can get better through the quarantine

No. 533639

Am I a neet if I only go to school during the semester and I work while studying over the summer?

No. 533642

…no you're not a NEET if you work and go to school. The fuck?

No. 533643

Neet stands for Not in Education, Employment, or Training.

You're in education and employed, so no you're not a neet.

No. 533644

File: 1585473778652.png (1.01 MB, 615x763, 1DFF4645-3D5C-4D6B-9E1D-526655…)

I MISS BEING NEET. Quarantine has been TOO COMFY. I want to relapse so fucking bad!!! The thought of soon I’ll have to drag my ass into the office be fake all day fills me with selfYEET feelings.

No. 533654

Okay but what if you're disabled and part time sometimes in school only, aside from some full time semesters.

No. 533682

You're still not neet…? Students aren't neets just because they do nothing during summer months.

No. 533716

do you just WANT the label neet?

No. 533749

Fucking same, I was working on going outside more to get over my hikikomori ways (for lack of a better term) but with all the lockdowns it's 2 years of slow progress going right into the trash. Thank you corona

No. 535227

Was a NEET for a total of three years between 2013-2018, have been in work for the last year and a bit in retail. As much as I liked being a NEET I did get housesick towards the end of the second straight year (1yr NEET/work/2yrs NEET), and I like my job.
Lockdown has been mad comfy and for now I'm still getting paid, thanks furlough. So used to talking to people every day at work that I miss the interaction a little, even though I don't live alone I'm trying to talk to people online more. You win some you lose some.

No. 535283

wow this is a really old post but i'm the anon who wrote the post you screenshotted …to be honest most days i feel bad about myself and i wrote those things as an exercise to see if i could change the way i think. probably due to lasting affects of abuse and neglect from self and others.
90% of the time i feel like a wolf in sheep's clothing around normies and am scared that i will be found out or someone will bring up my past where i was a mentally ill loser who even ended up in hospital by end of high school. and i spent a lot of time at uni alone studying so that's why i got good grades..
i just kept going each day and then one day i realized i got a life i could have never imagined as a child. i was just surviving for so long but only as of this year (23) do i finally feel alive. i even got into my master's program with a scholarship!
sorry if this was cringe or unhelpful but i just want to let you know you should keep putting one foot in front of the other. i had a rule called "no zero days" where i pushed myself to never let a day pass without doing something productive. and then you end up doing like 2,3,4,5,even 10 productive things. we believe in you!

No. 540078

>Don't let yourselves ever be shamed for not being part of the machine.
This is the worst advice you give neet. These people are not about bring about any kind of revolution. NEETs have some serious cases of learned helplessness, they don't need a rational to do less. NEETs should genuinely follow Petersons advice on self-help. If you can't lift yourself up from your bed, how will you lift anyone else up from poverty. You're most likely the poor person in question

No. 555002

Sorry for possibly necroing, but this is the most recent thread and I'm looking for some opinions. I'm a slowly recovering NEET (I've been working from home for over a year, but now I want to get back out into society), and I'm very attracted to the idea of going back to school and getting my degree.

However, I have this nagging concern that I'm already too old to do it. I'll be 25 by the time I start the 4-year course, and my friends that went to college finished by 21/22. I have severe anxiety and I go to a therapist, who of course has said that I should just go for it.

Does anyone have any success stories of going back to school slightly later than your peers? What do you guys think about it?

No. 555003

I go to class with literal boomers. Also no one is gonna ask how old you are.

No. 555005

nobody gives a sweet or sour fuck how old you are. you go to college for the purpose of gaining an education anyway.

No. 555025

Imagine letting such a nonsensical insecurity determine your life path. Not only are you virtually indistinguishable from someone in their early 20s, nobody cares if you took a few years to go back to school and university is full of mature age students decades older than you.

No. 555036

I'm also a recovering neet with severe social anxiety and I'm going to be 30 soon. I'm going back to college whenever they actually open again. You'll be fine. At 25 you're still young enough to blend in unless you're unusually old looking for your age. It's also unlikely that you'll be the only person who isn't going straight out of high school. I went back briefly at 25 and I didn't feel particularly out of place.

No. 555050

I tried college again at 25 and my school had older students and retirees that were taking classes. At first I was worried about being “too old” but it was fine. If anything it made me realize I want to be a lifelong learner and keep trying new things because I have a lot of respect for people who do that for themselves.

No. 555071

You're going to get older either way, do you want to be older with or without a college degree? Plenty of people go back to school at an older age for different reasons and no one cares. If you're anxious about your age then it'll be easiest if you go back now while you're still young enough to blend in with your peers.

No. 559749

also sorry for a late response but I was starting college this year at 22. of course because of corona my first semester was cancelled and I was only able to attend for like, a month (also, obviously, i'm not american).
it wasn't half as nerve wrecking as I thought it would be, there were a considerable amount of people older than me in my classes (the majority was still straight out high school tho). I did get a lot of questions about my age, but nothing too judgmental. It's hard not to feel inferior about the fact that I wasted 4 years of my life stuck in my room in a depressive episode but college will make you so busy you probably won't have much time to thought spiral about it, so definetly try doing it, anon!

No. 564487

im 20 and i cant bring myself to leave my house because i hate my body. Ive gotten fatter and i hate it so much. Ive been a neet since 2018 and i feel like such a loser. I never started college either.
Also i used to be able to get call center jobs but being the dumbass i am i quit many of them and now its hard to find some.
Should i work at home and consider going to school this winter? Please help me. the only reason why i havent killed myself is because i care a lot about my little sister and i want to be there for her.

i also associate all the fun stuff with my ex (i was 17, he was 23, took advantage of me and his whole squad made up lies about me.) Shit depresses me because i live in a small town and i dont want him or his friends to find me so i cant go out.

No. 564488

he also raped me but im too much of a coward to say it to anyone.

No. 564716

holy shit anon are you me? 22yo and starting university again but then covid hit

i guess I'm lucky that most of my school work is computer based anyway so i can keep going with school

good on you though, just a shame covid shit on our plans to get out and do stuff

No. 564853

Since the economy seems to be crashing down heavily, is it time to return to being a NEET?

No. 564861

it seems like it for me. shit girls, it sounds pathetic and like i'm making excuses but everything really was semi-on track.

No. 564980

Corona is actually our excuse to get back on our track, If we act socially awkward in public then we just blame on the quarantine

No. 564984

I was never socially awkward just trainwreck/not going anywhere in life, this all happened at a really awkward time and now i'm completely stalling. Oh well, we're all just animals. I'm not stressing about it anymore.

No. 568513

I feel like I’ve failed at becoming independent basically and every job I’ve ever had I’ve been tired from after a year. I don’t even want to go back to school because I’m not good at academic work and I can’t go to trade school because my crazy narc parents will reeeeee about how everyone in family is a doctor. They have a lot to do with me growing up to become such a pathetic person but at the end of the day I’m the one who failed to disengage. I should have just become a stripper or something abdcraj away from home at 18 but now I’m way too fucking old. The thought of continuing on with my life is so fucking bleak tho. I literally can’t get a job as a waitress or whatever because everything like that was nepotistic before Covid and now 70% of those business are expected to experience downturn. My only hope is try and get diagnoses with autism that I strongly suspect I have so many the govt will throw a little gibs that I can save up but my future just seems so bleak, no career, no husband, no family. I haven’t bother to date since December, at this point in my life none of the guys in my age bracket want to seriously date a NEET with no career or money unless I do an Anna Nicole Smith and literally find a old man. I just wish I could a part time job doing something I’m good at that I don’t find mind numbing boring so I can move the fuck out of this city.

No. 568529

Go to trade school then, surely your parents will like it mor than you’re sitting on your ass all day wasting rice
> literally can’t get a job as a waitress or whatever because everything like that was nepotistic before Covid and now 70% of those business are expected to experience downturn
Don’t know why you have this impression, comes off like an excuse to not try tbh
Sorry to say but a job is a job and a lot of time it is mind numbing, most of us don’t have a job we’re good at and love, let that go. You have to decide whether you want to move out and become independent enough to do what needs to be done. Or you can continue to wallow in learned helplessness.

No. 568538

Yes anon they have told me they would prefer I sit in my ass all day then embarrass them by getting a “low class” job. This has been our underlying dynamic since I can remember. Maintaining their image is as a “upper class” family is single most important thing I can do.

I tried doing that “pull yourself by bootstraps” attitude and going to like 15 diff bars/restaurants pre covid and they told me they don’t hire anyone w/o experience and don’t want to train, all the people I know who have similar jobs were hired by a friend. Everything is corrupt in some sense. Even half the time the education is just a scam like those stupid coding bootcamps that were so popular 2-3 years ago. I kind of hope the recession just causes the whole rotting edifice to collapse on itself.

No. 568658

lots of retail places where i live literally require 5 years of experience kek, now i'm noticing restaurants also are requiring 1-2 years. there's almost no hope for getting hired at the moment if your resume is on the bare side and you don't have much experience. better to just start selling on depop or get an online sugar daddy

No. 568662

so true. i have retail experience just under a year and there's a year in my country where you're supposed to get work experience while still in high school which i did too but no luck kek

No. 568728

I can’t tell if this a joke. Where the fuck do you live tf. Restaurants bars and fast food and coffee houses always looking to hire here. The only exception is family run mom and pops spots where the staff stays more or less the same for years.
Covid is making grocery stores scramble for temp hires. At most I’ve seen is “1-2 years of experience preferred” for retail but they don’t really mean that. Anyway, I’ve applied for plenty of jobs I had no exp in and got them anyway. Shoot your shots ya damn NEEts.

No. 568773

Coffee houses kinda vary, but most restaurants do want servers with experience. Waiting tables is demanding as hell. I've seen a lot of new servers either quit or do another job like hosting because it's too much. Hosts/bussers usually don't need experience, so that's a good place to start if you're looking for restaurant work.

No. 568775

damn where do YOU live?

No. 569354

any recovering neets socially awkward and really ugly? does it affect your job? do you like or dislike where you're working because of it?

No. 569822

I don't know whether I should stay safe and neety at home under the thumb of my incredibly manipulative BPD mother or risk crashing and burning as a wagecuck.
I don't know how much longer I can stay here because she mines all the joy from my spirit and I'm never going to grow as a person otherwise, I'm 25 so I feel like I'm overdue to leave. My government welfare covers my rent where we live, but if I move out, I won't be able to come back because someone else will have to take the room.
I don't have a huge amount on my resume (mostly bar work) and also I don't have faith in my ability to just grind if I need to. Everyone I know my age is poor and struggles to make rent every month.
If I move out, my welfare won't cover my rent, or I'll be left 50 or so dollars for the month. My only hope is a job working nights for retail restocking, which my friend who feels the same way I do about work has recommended to me, but in this economy I don't know even if that's safe.
She scaremongers me into staying so much of the time, one time I did move out and she was so passive aggressive about how much I talked to her, then I tried to kill myself because I was so stressed by the life that I had to come home. I've been recovering for about 4 years now. She resents me for being inexperienced and coddled when she's the one who coddled and shielded me?? I hate how she knows which buttons to press to drag every little bit of attention from me. She constantly spies on me and judges me. I don't like her or trust her as a person at all.
Do I just need to get over it and stay safe until the recession blows over? I'm planning to study something that will always guarantee me a job (health field) n but until I graduate (maybe 4 years away) I don't know what to do.

No. 569852

All you bitches going “wahhh NO WHERE will hire me they want EXPERIENCE”

Call center. Amazon. FedEx.

Yeah it will fucking suck because all first jobs do. Get over it. They are literally always hiring and if you try to claim otherwise you’re just privileged and choosing to do nothing about your situation

No. 569859

No where near a neet but I like to lurk here. You're privileged for thinking that people can get jobs at those places at the drop of a hat. My sisters job closed down (before covid shit) and applied for months to other places and didn't find a job until like 3 months later. Maybe in your yeehaw neck of the woods where there is a population of -10 call centers are hiring all the time, but not in major cities.

No. 569881

>socially awkward and really ugly?


I got my first job a few months ago and its one of the few jobs on earth where I dont even have to utter a single word all day and dress code is non existent. Im also surrounded by boomers so no young men to talk shit to me. Hell, I dont even make eye contact with anyone most days. Im feeling great lately, image wise.

No. 569901

what kind of job?

No. 569902

What's your job anon?

No. 569904

Tell us ur secret job anon pls

No. 569913

Once again I'm attempting to leave the NEET lifestyle behind. I applied to college hopefully it works out for me this time. The University is just waiting to receive my hs transcripts now. IDK if I am good enough to get accepted. My admission counselor said my ACT results looked good, but idk if they just say that to everyone. I have soooo much anxiety. I'm trying to just let go and remember whatever happens happens.

No. 569918

This was me in college when I worked as an office assistant for the custodial dept. lol they promoted me and it was so mismanaged that I would do basically nothing all day. Had to talk to a couple managers and boomers could be annoying af but usually it was really chill and I could watch shit on my phone for hours

No. 569926

File: 1592108657262.jpg (206.98 KB, 1280x720, garbage.jpg)


data entry for the government

monotonous but very stress free

No. 569951

File: 1592111956944.jpg (139.34 KB, 683x900, young-girl-crying-pietro-anton…)

I envy yourt cushy job so much.
I just quit my job because it was too much stress and I'm so afraid I will fall back into neetdom at 30 after 3 years clawinf myself out.

No. 570065

i wish you luck. School is the only thing that helped me to stop being a neet

No. 570079

I think corona has put me back into NEET mode. I've always been a loner who loves staying in my room, but now I'm unemployed too. I stay in my room pretty much 24/7. It's going to be so hard going back to 'normal' when this all ends.

No. 570201

Same, I'm going to lose a whole year to this

No. 570342

it is stress free but its also low pay

although if you can budget well its not a big deal

No. 570758

File: 1592242487795.gif (41.16 KB, 220x165, A8BB832A-5613-4F4B-B824-952F8B…)

Guys I’ll never be able to escape NEETdom. All I do every single day is clean my family’s mess. My parents work all day and are stressed. My siblings are lazy peices of shit. And my grandma who lives with us is supposed to cook and clean, BUT NEVER DOES. I do it all and am never thanked. I’m so exhausted. I entertained the thought of going to college, but if I don’t clean and take care of my mom nobody else will. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? It’s just so unfair that I’ve essentially been stuck here for FIVE YEARS because everyone else is lazy. I want a life! I want friends! But everyone else’s needs have to come before mine. It’s unfair I didn’t sign up for this. I don’t mind cleaning up after my parents since they took care of me and haven’t kicked me out. But thinking of having to juggle school work on top of cleaning everyone else’s mess it makes me feel exhausted. I can’t do it all. I lowkey feel like I am being encouraged to stay being a NEET by my mother bc she knows if I’m not around no one will cook food for her or keep the house in order. I feel like the only way I can escape is by kms, but I can’t.

No. 570763

this doesn't sound like NEETdom but your family using you. How much is there to do ffs, is your family a bunch of animals? If they don't thank you, don't do it. Do the bare minimum slowly and plan on how to go to college or move out. Also, why is your grandma expected to feed and clean for everyone as well? That's also shitty.

No. 571023

I gave up. I will always be a NEET. I made big changes but at the end I just can't.

Going to sell my weed my whole life and marry this guy with a house in the woods.

Good luck

No. 571369

the dream tbh,,

No. 571830

now this is something I have been meaning to ask ? If one is married and in happy/stable relationship can that person be a NEET ?

No. 571854

I didn't know it was a thing til I saw it on here. I've seen a couple of anons freak out after the break up of those relationships. Shit like the guy giving them a few months to get their shit together and move out but them just hanging on there because they have no job and little motivation to get one.

The nicer the bf is in letting them stay there rent free (after the breakup) the more they just stagnate and act like they can hang on forever. In one way I feel for them and in another way you want to shake them into action.

No. 572048

>>564487 anon here.
im going to commit suicide tonight.
im just tired of being worthless and feeling stupid because of my autism

No. 572058

Please don’t! Trust me if this is the worst pain you can possibly be in emotionally then it’s only going to get better. If you take your own life there’s no chance of that happening, I know things can get really tough. Your autism means that you’re way more creative and artistic than most so try and explore that path.
Please anon don’t do it, it does get better and never ever think you are stupid or worthless. You are most certainly not. My thoughts are with you anon, you are loved.

No. 572061

Anon, don’t. Please. You're being so hard on yourself. It’s difficult to carry on while in pain, but think about who will suffer without you here.
Don’t give up. Apply for those winter classes. Make a tiny positive change in your diet. Go for walks. You deserve to feel happy, don’t rob that from yourself. It might take a while, but it will come.
Please try to talk to someone if you can tonight.

No. 572071

thank you anons. i teared up reading your replies.

No. 572197

Life is more than your town or your career. Some people have more difficult starts in life but that does not mean you're limited. We have to find what we want and get it, and once we do it will feel so much better. I believe in you.
And if you really do wanna commit suicide, you may as well try for a month to live a happy life and get out of your situation and see how it goes. But life does get better.

No. 572200

I just wish i had a friend to talk to. Im all alone and it makes me cry everyday

No. 572202

you should post in the friend finder on /g/, anon. i'll be your friend.

No. 572232

thanks for the suggestion anon. I just posted >>142254

No. 572233

quote didnt work (im assuming its because its on g. I feel dumb)
my discord is potato.#9829

No. 572248

I’m so happy to hear that you didn’t go through with it. I’ve suffered from those thoughts in the past and the minute I opened up to someone that I trusted i felt much better. A problem shared is a problem halved.
I hope you start to feel better anon, there’s much much more to life that you just haven’t come across yet and the pandemic isn’t making things any easier. Don’t be so hard on yourself, you seem like a lovely person!

No. 572249

thank you so much anon.. you're very kind.

No. 574490

Sorry this thread seems kinda dead but how do you (or would you) explain the gaps in interviews?

I left school at 17, did some part time volunteering in a charity shop at 19 for a year, had a retail job for 3 months at 20. It's been nearly a year since I left that job and am trying to get my life back again starting with a min. wage job but I don't see how i'm meant to explain since leaving school 4 years ago I only had a 3 month job and all i've been doing is watching youtube and anime. I have depression and social anxiety but I haven't been diagnosed so I don't think I can really say the gap is because of medical reasons.

No. 575431

Do you have a hobby at all? On my resume I said I did "freelance digital art" even though I just took a few commissions throughout the years. Resumes are basically you trying to over-sell the shit you've done as much as possible

No. 575471

Ever since COVID, my anxiety and paranoia have increased to the point that I can't go outside unless I'm with my SO. I was doing really well the beginning of this year, I had a full time job (super shitty, stressful, and toxic work environment; had to quit), I walked to restaurants, stores, bus stops, etc by alone without freaking out too much. Then came COVID, then the protests and riots and violence, and I don't want to ever leave my room. I know I'll feel better if I go outside but the world just feels evil and I feel safer in my cocoon.

No. 575535

Not really. I like art but I never do it i'm more of a consumer, I feel like I could lie a bit about being a freelancer though

No. 575541

Yeah just say you did freelancing (or studying). I've done recruitment for our company myself and personally I've never been interested at looking at the gaps, people go through all sorts of shit and it's none of my business if they seem fine otherwise. A gap of one year isn't even that bad, a lot of people are in a shitty employment situation in today's economy.

No. 579311

I think the roots of my neetness is my complete lack of emotional control. Anyone can reccomend anything to better up? Good or basic, any media form.

No. 580293

I feel very hypocritical answering this question because I struggle with the same thing but dialectical behavioral therapy or DBT is often recommended to help with emotional intensity/control issues (it was invented to treat BPD but it's becoming more popular for a variety of MH issues). I've tried it, was too much of a mess to actually do the work involved but even just being exposed to some of the core concepts has helped a lot. You can do it on your own with workbooks/self help books (look into reputable ones), or with individual therapy, or in a group. In my area it seems like both individual and group DBT are available from multiple providers. So there are several ways you could go about trying to integrate it into your life.

No. 596234

After reading the pixyteri thread, I realized I could’ve been just like her if I didn’t get my own shit together which I did, with or without my parents. However, I’m grateful that my mom understands more about my depression than she had in the past.

I may not be bipolar or schizophrenic but I was manic and would react violently to my parents due to the near isolation, verbal/mental abuse and berating/expected servitude had taken its toll on me which to this day I still feel guilty of doing, but am grateful they didn’t kick me out. This was prior to 2015 when I went to another city to receive rehabilitative services for my disability and to get basic knowledge of obtaining a job and going to college which I always wanted to do.

I still battle with depression constantly and live with my parents who financially support me as well as paying my bills because I’m jobless atm even though I’m nearly 30, but I’m currently back in school attending summer classes for my bachelor’s.

I need to remind myself that I am blessed and grateful for the opportunities I’ve been given and that there are those here that are less fortunate like Sarah or even Chris for that matter. The only one I can thank is God for getting me to where I am today, even if it’s a little bit compared to others.

No. 596248

I’m now broke and still jobless , I haven’t gotten my employment benefits for two months and my financial aid reimbursements won’t come until September.

On the other hand, I’m back in school!

No. 596303

fuck it, i want to go back to being a neet so bad

No. 596499

I feel sorry for you anon. I don't know your life and your struggles like you do, but if your previous aspirations failed you, then consider finding a new purpose. Maybe you were right that we can't escape fate, but your certainty in your future misfortune is disturbing. Do something about. Even if you can't succeed in the way others succeed you are not a failure, because you are yourself(not others), so respect yourself by living in a way that reflects that. You have to conquer those obstacles that are unique to yourself, but don't make yourself your own enemy by seeing yourself as an immovable obstacle.

And honestly I think you are more free than the people who bullied you. You will never have that misdeed to live with, and you have the incredible opportunity to justly defend yourself. More life points for u. :)

In the future please stand up for yourself even if you look like a fool, even against an overpowering enemy. If it is any help remember you have nothing to lose,so know that you can only gain respect by protecting yourself from assault verbal/physical. If you show confidence that you have something worth protecting, people will at least hesitate to hurt you in the future. Whatever you do, don't end your life. I don't encourage violence against others, (mainly cause I don't want jail time,) but if society is causing you pain don't help society by destroying yourself. Redirect your destructive energies elsewhere. If others truly have the power/will to end your life then they would have done it, but they haven't and so they obviously can't, or don't want to. There is no one to fear. Stop looking towards society and it's physical appeals for direction and purpose.

If you want fulfillment don't equate it with success to begin with. We all fail, but people who are grounded in themselves don't need to be given anything,pleasure or praise to reach enlightenment.

No. 599767

Ok, I need some advice FAST. My sister and I are soon moving out of our parents house in the shithole country to live in our shithole town. I haven't had a job since the beginning of the year, but I just can't hold down a job. If we lived in town, I'd be able to actually walk everywhere and be closer to the few jobs in town. I need this so bad. This would be so good for me, but I'm so afraid of quitting a week into the job again. How do I avoid this? I don't even want a job. I'm so depressed all the time from being a complete disappointment and waste of space in my family, but I've been in a rut for years. How the fuck am I supposed to JUST pull myself out?? This is far from easy but this apartment is all my sister is talking abut, I don't want to disappoint her because she can't afford it on her own. But I'm just so deathly afraid of quitting again. Shit's keeping me up at night and I can't sleep. What do I do? What would I do if no one in town even hires me? then what? I'm so scared anons, I just want to be free from this hell. I fucking hate being a NEET. But school gives me anxiety, jobs give me anxiety, taxes give me anxiety, being ALIVE gives me aniety. I'm stressing tf out and I don't know what to do anymore.

No. 599800

>I'm so afraid of quitting a week into the job again
>I'm just so deathly afraid of quitting again.
>I'm stressing tf out and I don't know what to do anymore.
Try not quitting? I don't understand what your problem is.

> I don't even want a job

Nobody "wants" to have a job, dipshit. That's why people aim for retirement. If I was your sister and you neglected to hold up your end of the agreement just because you didn't feel like working a job, and everything we planned for fell through because of that, I would be pissed as fuck at you.
You need to take a deep breath, put on your big girl pants, and quit holding pity parties for yourself over easily fixable problems.

No. 599810

I really wish people gave me this sort of attitude growing up tbh. There wouldn't be NEETs in the world if parents weren't so soft on their children.

No. 599822

you sound really sheltered. figure out coping mechanisms for your anxiety and get a job you can handle. there has to be one that exists. eventually you’ll have to suck it up and work like everyone else. nobody WANTS to work their whole life, people just say that because it’s hard to accept otherwise. go work in a bookstore or something. anxiety sucks but it’s so common that nobody’s going to shit on you for being anxious about working whenever you do get a job. shit’s gonna be okay, anon. it won’t always be comfortable or fun but it’s a necessary evil and at least you’ll have some pocket cash for random stuff you actually DO want to do.

No. 599827

I have anxiety/depression and personally for me having a job and routine responsibilities helps me feel less useless. Rn i'm broke and living at my parents since I can't find work and it sucks and having nothing to do puts me into a terrible mindset and worse depression.
Jobs are hard but you have to get used to it and you can maybe even find one that is a good escape from your worries in life. Its always hard in the beginning especially interviews and stuff but it's worth it for your independence.

No. 600289

i dont know if im considered a neet because im an age where its not really that weird but i feel like thats an excuse more than anything. i had to drop out of highschool because of my health, and then for the next few years my family did nothing even though i was begging for them to take me to professionals. i couldnt do anything myself because i was a minor still. i finally got help after attempting to run off which i guess made them realize how serious it was. i worked on healing myself for some more than a year and i was finally going to start getting my license and ged and then a job, except then corona hit. ged places werent open at all even online. figured i would wait until the fall when things would probably be fine but because the us sucks at handling shit, things still arent good and nobody knows whats even going on with public schools yet in my state still, let alone anywhere nontraditional.

because i dropped out and was all fucked up i lost what little friends i have. i only have one friend in my life and we almost never see each other though we do text often because we are a 45 minute drive apart. i have almost no one.

i hate it so much. i hate lying around all day and having no real education. i feel like a drain constantly and a massive idiot. i know the world doesnt revolve around me, but it feels like every time something good happens to me and things start going okay they actually end up 100x worse. why does there have to be a pandemic the year i finally have the ability to get my shit together? sorry if this isnt the right thread or something, i usually lurk more than i post.

No. 600342

File: 1596987785251.jpg (56.14 KB, 311x700, 1545009424014.jpg)

Right now I'm in a situation where I have every opportunity to get myself to be independent and confident again. I passed a job interview for a place that's only 10 minutes away and the owner is super friendly and chill. My car is now fixed where I can get back into driving again and my partner is helping me with it, I'm finally going to be able to balance my art/craft with having some stable income and job without feeling like I'm just a failed/broke artist. I don't want to go back faking to my family that I'm living just fine on art alone. I hate have to rely on my partner so much and being home all day just making shit that only sells once in a blue moon.

I'm so excited to feel like I'm worth it again, I'm just scared something bad will happen and I'll revert back because even when I do make money from my art, do chores and make food/dinner for everyone in my household, I still feel like I'm just some moocher because they work way more than me. In a way, I'm scared that even after I start working, I'll realize that I'll never actually be happy with myself, that'll always feel like a failure.

No. 600729

i relate to this, i was fired from my second job ever after accidentally not showing up for unmentioned training hours (this was in high school though so who cares now), then i worked at a restaurant for like 3 months and quit because i couldn't handle all the stress and harassment from customers and coworkers, then i finally thought i was escaping my neet lifestyle by getting a cool full time store job and was let go after working for 2 days for a really petty dumb reason. my point is that i'm also very afraid and i have horrible luck and bad anxiety.

No. 602636

I'm one of the 35 year olds who posted way up thread, just got a job recently. Tomorrow will be my third day, and I hope it goes well. So far, I'm still getting used to everything, so I'm still fucking up now and again, but most customers seem cool about it.

I must have completely lucked out on managers, because he's been cool and encouraging so far.

No. 604715

I just booked an appointment to start driving lessons :) I've had a only a permit for 5 years now (i'm 25). Things are gonna be ok

No. 611557

How does one date as a NEET?? I want to get on a dating app, but all I do in my free time is wallow in self-hate and I'm afraid we'd have nothing to talk about

Congrats to both of you, anons!! You should be proud of yourselves!

No. 615007

I am basically a neet even though I am still in college. Now that corona has happened, all of my classes are online so I feel like even more of a neet. But at least I'm on a trajectory i guess. I was planning to try and get a part time job this year but I dont think I will because I dont want to get corona. Not sure what jobs I should even apply to. And im not sure what to do with my extra freetime. What do you guys do with all of your extra time?

No. 615021

I know that feel, anon, I’m the same, my classes are online, well, they’ve always been online, but the point is that on my free time I workout and learn another language, just doing two extra things really helps you feel like you’re being productive. I also draw and sometimes write dumb fanfics, but I don’t really count those as things that will help me feel productive.

Just try thinking of something that makes you feel like you’re spending your time in a good way.

No. 615241

trying so hard to not be a bored broke loser neet but when there's literally no fucking jobs in your city and the economy is getting fucked up again not seeing how i'm supposed to survive unscathed kek.

No. 615346

Bump? Dating tips for someone with no life? Please

No. 615507

I found a guy through IG. I just posted about one interest and the other posts were selfies. Just comment a lot so people know you are open for a conversation. I would never find a guy irl tbh

No. 615610

>recently left job due to things out of my control
>have enough money to last me for a few months to find new job
I feel myself getting more and more depressed like I was when i was a NEET before. Im scared taking time off without a set schedule is gonna fuck with my depression and im going to become NEET again

No. 633721

File: 1600508398068.png (437.96 KB, 540x429, 7a2f604116c5bb3c.png)

How do people genuinely stop being neets after life has just constantly been punching them in the face? It feels stupid to keep trying if I just have naturally shit luck.

No. 633856

Honestly just get a Job and a Hobby, for an adult those are the first big steps one can do to slowly get out of neetdom

No. 634926

Does anyone else talk to themselves a lot? I mean, a lot? I understand that it's normal to talk to yourself, but does anyone else talk like to their imaginary friends pretty much ad nauseum? For hours on end, that is. To the point where you just don't even consider seeking outside interaction.

For example, I was alone in the house, talking to myself as I usually do. I was having a really animated conversation, and I didn't hear my uncle come into the house. When I was done, I came out of my bedroom to see him in the office next to mine, to rather mortifying effect. He asked me if I was talking to a friend on the phone, but I'm a horrible liar and made it pretty obvious what I was doing. God, that was horribly cringey.

But, I've been thinking recently, in the presence of others, it's so easy to act timid. You never really know what they want. Why bother with the company of others when you can get your own? You don't have to be a neet to be asocial. There are still loner hobbies out there like biking, running, hiking, making kit models, and so on. I hate the idea that, in order to reject your neethood, you have to reject your entire personality. I'm pretty much the same person as I was when I was a neet, except I'm employed, I have hobbies, and I talk to my family more. It's not as bad as it seems, I feel.

No. 634930

I have conversations with a videogame character in my head daily. I don't know if it's bad, it's a way to work through my feelings. And the character is a nice caring mentor type so I use it to soothe myself too. But yeah getting caught by family is embarrassing, I now always wear earphones so when I make a face in reaction to the convo in my head I can pretend it's due to something I'm listening to.

Normies put too much emphasis on socializing. If you're a person who grew up with little to no socializing then it wouldn't make sense that you'll want to socialize at the level that normies do. That's my opinion anyways. Not to discourage people who want to socialize more. But if you're content and happy by your self then I don't see a problem.

No. 634946

I feel this comment so much… I had a really fundie dysfunctional fucked up childhood. Life feels like a black comedy, when things fuck up, they really fuck up. It's why sometimes I have to laugh when shit constantly happens to me.

My anxiety is at an all time high. I have to be drunk and/or high to leave my house without freaking the fuck out and trying to remind myself not to hyperventilate. Sudden noises make me physically jump and I feel crazy for looking weird in public.

I just want to stay in my house with my cat all day. Outside fucking sucks. People fucking suck and confuse me. I feel like a nut.

/End emo blog post

No. 635799

I know right… Sometimes I wonder if it's I just attract bad people & I havent been socialized enough growing up to know how to move through the world easier … Or if I'm literally. Just. Straight up cursed or born under a bad star sign or something.

No. 635815


I talk to myself a lot too. I’m not necessarily lonely these days, but I’ve always just done it. I have people/characters I converse with sometimes also, other than myself.
I grew up in a pretty lonely little world as a kid, and I think it always helped me cope and work through my emotions. Tbh, I find my own conversation comforting these days.

No. 635824

the key to not being timid is to not focus on meeting what others want in the first place which ironically will make them like you more because you stop being awkward and more relaxed around them

No. 635829

I talk to myself all the time. Tbh I vastly prefer my own company than talking with anyone else. Conversations with others will often bore me or drain me, but I have no such issues conversing with myself, it's endless amusement.

No. 636740

I'm in the same situation and I was actually planning to try to get my first job such as retail or grocery or something in the summer but then the virus happened (yes I was actually going to try not just say I would then do nothing). I thought I could get one soon but now my country is entering the second wave of the virus and I just don't want to risk it. I hate how I'm wasting another year with no work experience ever and I feel so behind compared to my friends who are so much more independent than me, and now if I try to get a job after the virus I fear they're going to judge me for being so old and never having a job. In my free time I explore outside, consume media that I torrented (books, films) and I just got an instrument for my birthday which I'll start self-teaching when it arrives. I also use the website Prolific to get money for small things I want and I search for online jobs.

No. 637640

File: 1600957775380.jpg (2.2 MB, 2448x3264, IMG_20200618_120332.jpg)

I got accepted for an at home document scanning job. I feel like I can handle that and I'm exited to get some spare money, but my parents are all 'why don't you get a full time job outside of the house huh???'. I'm trying my best, but it never seems to be enough for them, they want me to turn into a normie over night. I get burnt out just listening to them.

No. 637656

Good job, anon! I'm happy for you! Fuck them, just do your best and try not to stagnate. You're steering the right course!

No. 637712

Ex neet still struggling with anxiety around doing certain adult things… I now live alone but I ordered a fucking fridge 3 weeks ago and the delivery estimate came and went with no fridge. Emailed multiple times with no reply and finally rang today.

God I fucking hate making those kinds of calls. Worth it though, getting refunded. If I weren't so broke I'd be tempted to be like "welp that's 200 quid I won't see agan, no biggie" That's how much I dread phone calls.

No. 637756

I feel you. My sink has been broken for like a month but I haven't called maintenance to fix it yet bc I hate having people in my apartment and also hate making phone calls to schedule a time for them to come over. I've just been using my bathroom sink for everything.

No. 637762

Exactly the same. I also vomit on occasions when I'm forced to interact with people.

Also, I feel like a NEET even though I do technically work online and make more than the average wage in my country.
I'm afraid if my online earnings for whatever reason stop that I'll be forced to actually work with people.
I'm immensely happy that this thread exists because otherwise I'd sound like a special snowflake so reading all these posts that sound as if I've written them gives me a bit of solace.

If it weren't for internet I'm sure I would have already killed myself. The few times I had a normal job it went badly despite all of my good will and attempts.

I'm so proud of you anon! It's the little steps that count and your parents are terrible for not being more encouraging. I completely understand how you feel. My parents did the same thing. It's like they don't realize how much effort it takes to muster the strength for any type of socializing and interaction. They would see me trembling and vomiting but it didn't matter one bit.

No. 638301

I almost feel like I have no right to post here. I just got a job after 2 years of being NEET from graduating, was financially supported by my partner but we broke up not long ago. I'm 29. I felt literally worthless tbh, not being given even the opportunity to prove my worth. I tried to get internships (rejected) and volunteered but I never fit in.

It's very temporary but it's a graduate job, rent and bills would cost about 1/5th of my wage which is the smallest percentage I've ever had to pay. Up until now I've done shitty customer service jobs where it took up like 80% of my wage and the rest went on food. My whole ethos is based on being super frugal at all times, I don't know what I'll do with my disposable income.

I'm also generally an anxious wreck. Customer service was OK because they didn't expect you to care, I could put on a whole ass fake persona. When I did an internship that had actual office politics it drained me and I ended up only coming in once everyone left (thank god I could be flexible) because I couldn't stand it. It was like I had to be myself, but a very curated version of myself who dealt with hypocrisy, backstabbing and credit stealing.

So how can I deal in a 9-5 Mon-Fri environment where it's been described as "can get stressful, don't take things personally".

I mean I'm so glad I can be independent and all that, but the thought of not being able to handle it terrifies me.

And jumping from quarantine where I only interact with my ex to a full working environment seems so so overwhelming.

No. 639732

Is anyone else a hopeless neet? It's been almost two years since I went outside and I don't know if I'll ever manage to get better again, I don't even have a rock bottom because it just keeps getting worse and worse. I would love to find a shut in friend to share feels with who's in the same boat and understands.

No. 641126

I am a neet at 21, I used to feel so shitty all the time partly because of that. doing loads better with depression but I still feel bad for it. however I've been working in therapy to view myself better, to accept how I dropped out of college due to physical illness. and it wasn't even the first after multiple illnesses, my luck is so shit.

Eh i'll be honest I'm posting here because an anon elsewhere said neets have no excuse and it hurt my feefees lol… I mean she's right, it's just that it's been so fucking miserable. I don't see how I could have prevented those illnesses. It's probably true though, that if I'd tried harder I would be better off by necessity. I made a lot of mistakes staying home in high school from anxiety and shit that I should've faced and tried harder. I was too dumb to do more in therapy than cry lol

I live with my parents and right now there's corona so yay lol. That's why I'm not going for a job exactly. I'm probably gonna enroll in the local community college and not let myself give up. with classes online that seems the safest option. my therapist says it can work long term to get me a career and move out, my ultimate goal

Yeah so idk the guilt sucks. I wish I didn't end up like this. I wish I could've stayed in school despite the already crushing guilt of using my parents' money for uni while completely lost about what I was doing there, or at least have had a job

No. 641136

That anon hurt me too. But she most likely is one of those people who thinks everyone has the same opportunity and if they fail it's their fault.

I'm a 28yo NEET. Worked one year of my life. I'm planning a life were I don't have to work, as it's just not realistic that I will be happy that way. I want to grow all kind of stuff in my garden and sell it so I make a little bit of money and have something to do.

No. 641140

I want to hug you don't feel too bad pls, you're right.(I'm overemotional sorry)

You know that's a beautiful aspiration I hope you can make it happen some day soon. Gardening seems so therapeutic in general. That sounds like a dream I don't see why you shouldn't want that, idk reading this made me feel better and I really wish you the best. It must be exciting to imagine how your garden will be

No. 641143

File: 1601362554686.jpg (62.62 KB, 1200x630, 181016-hugs-mn-1305_fde3d1a7d5…)

Thank you baby neet. I have thick coat because I'm a neet so long. Sometimes I even forget that people hate us, that anon reminded me of that.

No. 641168

27 year old neet here. I’ve always wanted to keep chickens and goats.
Do you want to start a neet farm.

No. 641173

Not sure about goats, but chickens are my dream. If anything fails, can we just marry and have a farm pls?

No. 641191

Hello anon, I'm also 21 and a neet due to illness. I used to have all these projects and ideas and hopes in my head, and seeing them being crushed because of something you cannot control would make anyone feel miserable. Don't be so hard on yourself, and don't listen to that anon, she doesn't know what she's talking about. It's great that you plan on enrolling in college again! I hope everything goes well. Not really much to say, I just really empathise with you and wish you well!

No. 641331

30 yr old unemployed spoonie here and I agree that hearing people make the generalized assumption that everyone is in their current situation totally because of their own laziness or weakness can leave you feeling very guilty. Worst still when it comes to illness "well I know of this person who has the same thing and they're fine!" implying you're just making excuses. It really does hurt to hear and you start questioning your own decisions and self-worth based on the standards of others.
Stay strong, anons. I know that's easier said than done but if we survive 2020 we're stronger than we know.

No. 641593

how do i get thicker skin when i don't even have thin skin but none at all?

in the past two years i've went to school, gotten my driver's license, gotten into a serious relationship. now i finally have a job. (technically my second one. my first one lasted a week…)

i'm terrified i won't be able to keep it. i'm good at the busy work but i go full autism mode when interacting with strangers, aka all customers. i'm awkward and shy, even when i try to act confident and repeat what my coworkers say it doesn't feel natural and i'm sure it doesn't look natural. people being rude or impatient hurts, i take it to heart even though i know i shouldn't. my hands noticeably shake when i get nervous. then i make stupid mistakes because my brain and body are in an anxiety frenzy.

feeling pretty shitty about my lack of living skills tbh

No. 641690

I became a complete social recluse for the past eight months, even though I was previously very extroverted. Quarantine destroyed my social skills, and I've had a bit of emotional trauma this year. I've become very paranoid and scared of people.
But today (!!!!!!!!!) I decided to talk to a girl who had sat next to me. It took me about 50 mins to muster up the courage. we talked abt nirvana, courtney love case (kek), when i moved here, etc. my only friend spoke to me today, i always expect ppl to ignore me. it gave me such a confidence boost. imma go back to my old self now. feelsgood.

No. 641962

I realised my post is probably more relevant to this thread than any other.

Past 18 months or so I've been unemployed and looking. Not had a job in at least 5 years though and before that they were all minimum wage I didn't give a shit about. Now that I have a contract secured I'm so scared of it all. Literally only dealing with the calls, emails and contracts my daily workload has jumped tenfold. I haven't even started but I'm wondering WTF did I do with all the free time I had?

What if I'm late? I need to be up closer to 5 than my usual 7.
What if I get my period?
What if I straight up don't feel like it that day?
What if I get a headache?
What if the staff are mean?
Worse, what if the boss is mean?
What if the trains are really crowded and uncomfortable?
What if I really need to do a big shit but the bathrooms always have someone in them?
What if the weather is AWFUL?

I'm tired today because I had to answer like 3 emails and make a phone call. How will it be with 8 hours of solid work + a 1 hour commute each way?

It's a privileged af issue to have, but the home/unemployed conveniences are something I've had for long enough to be used to and unsure how I'll go without. If it was raining heavily I'd just curl up with some tea, when I was stressed I'd just promise myself I'd do less and relax a bit. Assholes? Just stop associating with them. Can't do that with a job.

I feel so ungrateful. I used to think all my issues would be solved with a job, and it's like I'm making new ones up because I just can't be without problems.

No. 641980

The only things you can really do are practice, and “fake it ‘til you make it”.

My first full time wage slave job after I turned 18 was in fashion retail. It suddenly required me to approach and up-sell grumpy people while getting watched through cameras and constantly harassed through an earpiece. On top of that, most of my coworkers and managers were fucked in the head, nitpicky, high school tier gossipers. It was hellish for the year I was there, but it snapped me out of my shy, spaghetti spilling shit and I went into my next job feeling (and appearing) way more normie/capable.

No. 642002

Nta but this fake me til you make it shit broke me. Maybe it works for some people tho

No. 642039

>> What if I'm late? I need to be up closer to 5 than my usual 7. And?

>>What if I get my period? Take tampons.

>>What if I straight up don't feel like it that day? Grow up

>>What if I get a headache? Take a Panadol

>>What if the staff are mean? Worse, what if the boss is mean? Toughen up.

>>What if the trains are really crowded and uncomfortable? Stand and suck it up. Are your legs broken?

>>What if I really need to do a big shit but the bathrooms always have someone in them? Shit or get off the pot.

>>What if the weather is AWFUL?

Wear a jacket.

This is shit school children have usually learned to handle. How did you even get hired?

No. 642124

I wrote this in the vent thread but I'm going to post here too because it fits better. I feel like I'm never going to find a job. I have shitty social skills, non-existant self-esteem, I'm slow, I have a shitty degree in a useless humanities field and I've worked in the same place for 4 years, so I don't have experience in other fields. I feel fucked.
I know my attitude and my beliefs are a big part of the problem - I don't think of myself as a worthy human being, I don't feel like I have anything to offer and I radiate uncertainty, self-hate and low self-esteem and the potential employees pick up on that. But how the fuck can I change all these in a short amount of time?? I need a job as soon as possible

No. 642156

I had a shitty job for nearly a decade and NO DEGREE and you wanna know how I jumped into a career I don't hate?
I literally pretended, as hard as I could, that I was at least a successful Becky with a tragic backstory (it helps that my life was actually pretty tragic), and I got hired.
Just lie. Don't lie about things you'll get caught on, but lie to yourself that you're worth more, and that you can change your life.

No. 642178

No. 652626

I just want a neet friend who has crippling social anxiety and can't go outside at all like me is that so much to ask lol…

No. 657941

Blogpost, I went to drop off my resume at a small grocery store, felt like I was going to shit and throw up but I managed to fake being chipper with only one fuckup (I insinuated that they didn't get sales as much during no holiday days). I hope they hire me, it's full of older European ladies that remind me of my mom.

No. 659563

"Recovered" NEET, going to second year of university this semester, but now every course is online so it's almost like I'm back in my NEET days, kek. It feels so weird listening to everyone moan and cry about not being able to hang out that much and being inside all day while I feel great. Obviously I won't admit to that.

No. 659580

File: 1603134578903.jpg (16.36 KB, 480x360, hqdefault.jpg)

They want to train me, I'm hired? Still feels like a joke. I'm scared, I'm going to start in a few days. Now I have to make up a normie tier excuse of why I didn't work or go to school for a few years.

No. 659582

Neets have natural resistance to pandemic hysteria kek. Yeah the shutting down of society is bad but I still find it kind of comfy, lots of people have to be hermits now and it doesn't feel as bad to be a hermit anymore.

No. 659586

Just say you dropped out or had to take care of a sick family member or something like that.

Good luck, you can do it!!

No. 659687

I have a year long gap and just said I went to school online part time and helped a family member with childcare.

No. 659800

File: 1603147520686.jpg (48.68 KB, 960x960, 89055208_639808003488686_90476…)

I'm so happy anons! After a year of NEET-dom I've finally managed to get a job. I'm working as a tutor, which I really love because it's good pay for relatively few hours and I can pick my schedule plus I enjoy teaching.

My next steps are applying for grad school in the field I want to go to and finding a hobby after lockdown ends. I'm hoping that because everybody has been forced to limit their social interaction no one will be able to detect that I'm an autistic hikki.

No. 659886

Signed up for fetlife today advertising myself being a 20 y/o virgin

Hoping for some guy to show me the ropes

I don't have high hopes

No. 659888

>Hoping for some guy to show me the ropes
You mean take advantage of you because you've advertised just how inexperienced and vulnerable you are? And on a fetish site, jesus christ… please anon, just find a decent normie guy. They won't care if you're a virgin and it's not hard to learn how to fuck, I promise.

No. 659889

adorable alligator and that's great progress!!!

No. 659890

He's going to show you the ropes in his murderape van, you fucking toddler

No. 659891

Why would you post this here

No. 659892

Congrats anon!!!

No. 659895

Anon please don't do this. The people who use fetlife are really fucked up and you could be putting yourself in harm's way.

No. 659905


Just use a dating site you loon, imagine being a virgin and jumping straight to a fetish site.
>dating site: socially retarded porn addicted scrotes
>fetish site: manipulative sociopathic porn addicted scrotes

Choose your poison.

No. 663895

I do want to go back to college but I don't know if I can. I wasn't even a hermit for very long, but my cognitive abilities have become dog shit. Any one else become legitimately stupider after being a neet?

No. 663901


Yes. Get yourself ready before going back to school it will make life easier and not be wasting your money and time.

No. 663903

I was a neet until age 19 (literally dropped out of school super young because of extreme agoraphobia and neglectful parents) somehow I’ve managed to become a functioning member of society and am a working human living alone at the grand age of 25. I have a lot of love and sympathy for fellow neets.

No. 663913

I put my degree on hold for 5 years and am just returning now. Prepare yourself by building good habits, healing eating and exercise and a regular sleep schedule. Create a stable home environment where you can feel good about studying. Make sure you have the tools you need to handle anxiety, whether you rely on cbt or therapy or medication. If you can help it, consider registering for half instead of a full course load. All of these will help tremendously. Ime the first month and a bit was the toughest for overcoming brain rot, but put in the effort and your hard work will pay off. The clear trajectory of your improvement will motivate you and you'll feel good about finishing your degree. Don't let fear hold you back, you can do this anon. It's not too late to refine your critical thinking skills I promise you!

No. 664015

share more please anon, i basically dropped out of school at age 11 and never worked a day until i was almost 20. what was your path

No. 664039

I am 24 and I feel I’ve been a partial NEET since I finished high school at age 17. I’ve had anxiety and depression since I was 4 years old because I lived in an abusive household and was bullied relentlessly at school. I have felt suicidal since I was 12 but I was only diagnosed with depression and anxiety until I was around 16-17. I have no positive memories of my childhood and I never had any real friends because the “friends” I did make were never close to me (they felt more like acquaintances) or ended up betraying me in some way (such as ditching me to be with “cooler“ people) which is why I am so afraid of becoming close to people.

I saw many psychologists and psychiatrists but it really did not work out, I was transferred around a lot by them because my case was “so severe”. I did attend university for about 2 years from 19 to 20 but my mental illness had me failing everything and I dropped out. I wasn’t able to socialise with anybody and while I tried to make friends I came off as awkward and I was afraid of becoming too close. I later attended some training to become a lab tech when I was 21 but my brother’s attempted murder attempt of my mother and my grandmother passing away from cancer had me not attend the classes for 2 years - I just stayed at home and cried all day during those years.

I only received a lab tech certificate when I was 23. I found out I couldn’t get any job with my certificate and I was recommended to do the diploma. I started doing my diploma but I had severe concentration problems because of my anxiety (I kept dissociating in class) and I was always depressed. I failed multiple subjects again. My teacher wanted to talk with me about repeating my classes but the COVID-19 pandemic had the institute reduce its hours making it very hard for me to make any appointment with him and my grandfather was diagnosed with epilepsy so the family has had to take care of him. So much time has elapsed by then that I was too afraid to go back to the institute and I feel like I have forgotten everything I have learned (my memory is horrible). This whole year I have had to stay at home and I’ve just been even more anxious and depressed the whole time. I cry a lot anytime I think about my life and how I have achieved nothing with it. I even downloaded some friending apps just to get some socialization but nobody would even send a message to me because I am ugly looking. I even thought about attending some social events in the local community but there’s nothing available because of the ongoing pandemic.

I have no degree, never had a job, don’t have any friends, never had any boyfriend, live with my parents, and basically stay home all day surfing the web. I feel worse when I look at what my people my age are up to and how I am completely unable to relate to any of them which furthers my isolation from society.

No. 664112

Do you want my email? I could also make a Discord if you are more comfortable with that. Please contact me, I want to talk to other NEETs because it's so lonely.

No. 664875

>got diagnosed with complex post traumatic stress disorder, generalised anxiety disorder, and major depressive disorder

feels bad man

No. 668462

File: 1604722017689.jpg (49.68 KB, 500x375, 1601298457828.jpg)

Does anyone know any tips on how to push through and get your shit together even if you have extreme avoidant tendencies? I haven't come across much good advice except "be more mindful". And while that is good advice, it's not really enough. It helps but not enough. Has anyone been able to manage their extreme anxiety or depression? If so, what helped?

No. 668474

Probably wont be helpful but… Facing direct consequences for not doing what I had to do. Like getting late fees, breakout from not doing hygiene, etc. I now have a job after being neet for 3 yrs because my parents threatened to kick me out. On my work break I lock myself in the bathroom and stress cry. Im not saying 'suck it up' but compartamentalizing can help you push through for the stuff that really needs to get done.

No. 668479

nta but this is something i needed to hear right now

No. 668729

Kinda similar to the other anon but my therapist made me figure out external motivational factors that I have control over. For example while sitting in therapy she made me text my roommate to ask if she could help me write a cover letter. (I don't need help writing, I need help getting motivated to write.) Organizing a study group for college work. Telling my mom about a cool job opening or an upcoming exam because my mom WILL ask about it next time we chat and guilt trip me if I didn't apply or didn't study.

As you can see most of my motivation comes from other people.

No. 677837

It makes me sad to see this thread kinda inactive. I've been breaking my own NEET records lately. It's been like 4 years? Though I did get my get shit together in some forms I still have no progress on getting monetizable skills. I'm just stuck on this loop of not doing anything productive. Sometimes I break the cycle and actually do stuff but this time I'm failing pretty help. Anybody who has any tips for getting off your ass basically?

No. 677849

Nta and late reply. External motivations do nothing for me if they're negative, because tbh my main problem is with authority. Consequences for actions I choose to do are easier to deal with mentally than doing things I am asked/forced to.
Does the external motivation method also have a positive side?

No. 677851

nta but you gotta form goals, envision yourself doing something you want, to the point it can be motivation that's empowering. too often I'd focus on those externals, and the guilt, then end up not improving at all because of it. And idk helps to remember how shit it feels to be like this now. it's tempting in the moment but then you regret the choices you made or didn't make. It feels good to have done something worthwhile. Additionally, for me I had to see the bigger picture, like is this how I'm living the one life I'm given? is this how I want to go down as? the neet who did nothing? no, I want to make something of myself, though it doesn't have to be big. it's kind of a sense of shame but from your own self. our values may differ though but best wishes

No. 677854

o I want to add that you can reward yourself for small achievements. snacks or other indulgements, they can be prizes for when you successfully face/get something done, if the feeling itself is not enough

adding to all of this I'm also in therapy and it has helped once I realized I needed to put in full effort. It's not even hard i just didn't understand how therapy works at first lol, it doesn't happen magically in one try

No. 677855

Thanks for advice anon, but idk if I'll ever go back to college.

No. 677860

then is there some other option? or maybe the issue(s) you have with college need to be faced? not trying to disregard that, but I'm actually gonna go back myself. I had some faulty beliefs about what would happen if I did, that cbt was able to help. there are resources online for that too. I want to give school another chance, because I've learned things and reached the end of my rope with being a neet. And while there's no guarantee college won't bring struggles, there's also no guarantee it will. or that I can't face them better. Anyway sorry if this all ends up not helping. what's good is even by posting here it shows you haven't given up. You're still trying to find a way and that's a crucial part to grapple with

No. 677863

ugh sorry last post, but I have to add if you have really bad mental problems then obviously therapy is something I believe in (if you can afford it). things aren't gonna solve themselves and you can always get better at your approach. I spent so much time in bed with no hope and now that has changed, which is huge in itself for me. again good luck!!

No. 677906

Yeah I get that, I got a job a month ago and stopped being neet, am driving to practice for my license… But nothing feels different. Still dead inside but now I just have extra stress and abit of money. I don't know what advice to give, other than just keep trying, if you still have the spirit. Going downtown to look at homeless ppl scares me into keep going to work.

No. 678736

this doesn't really qualify as a neet but throughout ages 13-17 I was extremely isolated from other people due to bullying which made me quite socially inept and I still struggle with a lot of shit I did back then.
notably I have to force myself to meet new people and spend time with them even when i'm feeling lonely and want to see someone because I got so used to being alone as an extrovert that I conditioned myself to accept it and being overly social is alien to me. I sometimes neglect my relationships because I just don't know how they're supposed to look. I got into social media pretty late for this day and age too (like 17 when I finally started recovering) so when someone I just met adds me to talk I never message me them unless they do it.
But I think my biggest struggle is my depressive thoughts over everything I have missed out on. Sometimes I will watch a coming of age movie with young girls bonding and feel so incredibly sad because I never got to experience any of this and likely won't anytime soon as I'm struggling with making friends and everyone I knew irl is scattered across different cities because of college. I have one friend close to me but she's very introverted and prefers texting unless I'm such a loser she's just making excuses to not hurt my feelings lol

No. 692783

This might sound morbid but try thinking about what it'll be like when you die, and imagine the handful of possibilities (be VERY realistic, rather than exaggerated- life is not a hollywood movie). After around a week of panic attacks, and remembering the brutal natures of life, I started getting "my shit together" and now I'm volunteering 5 days a week, and might get a part time soon (I can't guarantee that I'll land this one, but its worth the shot).

Routines are vital in getting out of the toxic NEET hole, start off with cleaning your room, or at least parts of it, and tell yourself explicitly that "if you aren't able to do this thing to your fullest; you won't be able to do the things you desire with your 200% effort" Your life depends on this routine and the others to follow. Keep continuing your routine until you're comfortable enough to "do more", you can ask your parents and whatnot on chores you can help with.

Also remember that despite whatever repetitive mistakes you have; you should notice that your recent mistakes were less bad than your first ones. You are responsible for your own self, so it won't be 'foolish' to like & respect yourself.

We're all gonna die one day, each in our own ways. Be grateful for the precious things you have still, and don't be afraid of experiencing things (safely- don't do shit like drugs omg). And find ways to take in the feelings of your sadness, not to amplify or force your sadness out, but just take it all in. Fictional examples are dumb, but this is the best I can find to explain what I mean.

No. 692968

These posts made me think, what do you do when you have a vision of what you want to do? I know what my direction is but realistically there are too many things in the way. Right now I'm just waiting to hit rock bottom and die. I at least like how dramatic it all is.

No. 692971

Also to add that what stops me from talking to people getting out of neetdom is the fact that I can't present myself the way I want. I know it's superficial but looks are everything imo, and I will never be able to invest in the image I want

No. 692977

Can you segment it? I’m assuming you’re thinking of a situation along the lines of needing a BA to get into a career but you dropped out of high school. Some people might be motivated throughout the process by thinking of the career, but some people might be put off as it’s so far away. In the latter case, you could focus on achieving each big step. Step one, the goal is to get your GED or whatever so you can get into college - but rather than thinking about it as step one, see it as the end goal if that makes sense. That way it’ll feel closer to achieving, then when you move onto step two you can think about that. Don’t get ahead of yourself, and remember that each step is an independent achievement, not just you inching toward your goal.

> realistically there are too many things in the way

At the risk of sounding like a motivational speaker, there were many things in your way when you were learning to walk, talk and all the other complex things that no one is born able to do. Human beings can be remarkably determined, it’s difficult to harness but the raw material is inside you somewhere.

Finally >>692971
Don’t be silly nonnie, even if you’re genetically completely fucked (which I doubt) that’s no excuse to NEET your life away. If you’re not going to be Miss World then might as well put effort into something achievable.

No. 694500

Every weekend I get a taste of being neet again and I miss it, I hate this "just go to work to save money for school" part of recovery. I'm getting white hairs from all the stress of trying to interact normally with people at work, and not accidently offending them, and ultimately failing. But since I can work a "normal" job I'll never be considered for autismbucks. I can't even use autism to explain to my parents why I failed at life because they'll think it's some lazy excuse and be even more disappointed in me.

No. 694651

how do u offend ppl anon?

No. 695828

Really wish more people would post their overcoming NEETdom stories. I need some sort of baseline as to where to start, how do I progress. I know about the setting small goals thing but how small are we talking about here

No. 698754

File: 1608548126337.jpg (43.43 KB, 500x750, 169498a6758ed970ca1835da8491df…)

I'm not 100% a NEET since I'm doing my bachelor's degree but I wanted to drop out since the first semester, and I'm so close to failing pretty much every subject not because I'm stupid but because I don't study at all because I have no motivation to do nothing doing relatively good for someone who never studies my life has been just memes and stupid IB and internet culture for years, everything is the same and life has become tasteless and without a purpose, I don't have friends and my relationship with my family is shit, I don't read books, I don't watch movies or shows because nothing catches my interest anymore, I'm so detached from my own country's politics and so focused on American politics, I lost interest in everything I once enjoyed, quarantine made everything worse and even my speech deteriorated I can't socialize with people anymore and every other issue became worse than before.

I've been feeling confused about my own identity and purpose for the past couple months but with no real answer, I've tried sitting with myself and trying to figure it out time and time again but I couldn't every time but I always tried to make a change. Last night I had an epiphany while lying in bed thinking of all the years I spent online, I knew exactly what to do… I deleted 1.5k+ of the memes I had, unfollowed almost a hundred accounts, and I left half of the discord servers I was in, I'm gonna start trying to look tamer because I wouldn't be able to live with myself as a 100% normie but I'll try and be more normal and happy, I'll fix my relationship with everyone and try to make new friends that I can meet IRL, I will get back to my hobbies slowly and I will start learning more about all sorts of things and I'm gonna get better at school so I can secure a job when I graduate… I will have more to my life than the internet, the bits I experienced when I pushed myself to change felt great, I felt alive.

Hope this one sticks and I don't relapse into the madness that is internet addiction. life isn't too bad.

No. 698774

File: 1608552365800.jpg (14.3 KB, 236x212, 60ba05f6531348c56ec67cd2c32da5…)

Former neet here
I was a neet from age 15-18 with one year spent not leaving my room. I eventually had to get physiotherapy to recover my body from not leaving my bed for basically a year. There were a lot of reasons why I became a neet, but like most here, the biggest reason was mental health issues like PTSD, depression, anxiety and undiagnosed autism. At age 18 I spent a year in a mental institution and was eventually diagnosed which helped me a lot with figuring out how my brain works and how to make myself be productive, but interestingly, the mental institution wasn't what helped me get out of my behavior. A very traumatic event happened when I left the institution and after that I basically just… changed. I asked myself 'Why does this keep happening to me? Why are people so cruel?' and other self-pitying thoughts. What made me change was realising that I wasn't making things better by neglecting my health and that self-pity wasn't going to help me either. What's important is to be stern with yourself, but kind… And self-pity isn't self-care. After that I gradually learnt how to take care of myself and I started going to school again (better late than never) I stopped caring about trying to appease people and I just let myself exist and think about how I can improve to make me like myself more. I'm now 20 and finally on my last year of high school and I'm doing great! I want to get a job where I can help people and be useful. It really feels great knowing you're on the right track and being able to be proud of yourself… Don't give up! It will be hard in the beginning when you go out and try to change, but eventually you will feel that struggle is a part of you learning to respect yourself.

No. 698784

I try to be positive and talk, but can't keep it up for long so I go silent after a while, which I guess they see as me being rude? (its an all female workplace). I sometimes ask qs to clarify but they answer like it should be obvious. I don't talk about myself either BC I like my privacy but it seems like that offends them? But I still don't want to do it.

No. 698787

nta but I had the exact same problem. I don't know how I'd survive if I didn't have an online job. They really do get offended but there's no way I'm going to force myself to talk shit just for the sake of it and even worse, to gossip. I'm probably going to start looking for jobs again and I dread if my next work environment is going to be remotely similar. The last job I had had your identical situation where at the end of my contract, the women started resenting me. I'm slow at picking cues but few months in I started sensing that they were angry at me for not joining in with their convos. I just wish I could do my job and that's it. It's not that I was rude, I just didn't have anything to add to their conversations and I'm frankly not interested in their lives. I became a long time NEET after that experience. It burnt me out so much.

No. 698794

Rooting for you, anon. That's a pretty huge step to take

No. 698802

File: 1608559682670.jpg (57.26 KB, 736x919, 1544967b63ea9849dbc5bc2db2530f…)

Small steps are great, but what worked for me was throwing myself to adversity, confronting real life and doing the best I can. I wasn't a NEET but in high school I was depressed, had unhealthy habits and severe anxiety. Before going to college, I worked in retail for a few weeks at my parents' clothing store and that made such a difference. At the start I was a mess, made many mistakes and was uncomfortable all the time but with patience, perseverance, and the (healthy) pressure to do good, I got better, learnt a lot of skills, started feeling at ease in "real life situations" and ended every day feeling proud of myself.
Adversity makes us grow because it pushes us out of our comfort zone, feeling challenged and uncomfortable it's great for developing a thick skin and getting your priorities right, so I'd recommend you to get into an activity that it's safe, difficult but doable, like a sport that you always wanted to try, language classes or maybe a job at a familiar area

No. 699540

Is there a way to improve social/emotional intelligence alone in quarantine? I lost my two remaining friends recently, they cut me off and I'm all alone now. I'm not going to go into the details, but it all comes down to my lack of emotional intelligence. I'm super awkward socially and very often in social situations I realize retrospectively that I behaved insensitively or unempathically. I also have a staggering fear of emotional intimacy, I find it super hard to open up. Whenever someone asks me personal questions, I feel attacked, although I know I shouldn't. Whenever I'm in any sort of a relationship I feel a strong inclination to cut it off, be it a friendship or a romantic relationship, because in my head, being alone = safety, but at the same time I crave closeness. How do I change this? I feel lost, they were my only friends

No. 700066

I've let myself get lazier during lockdown and not look for jobs at all, using the virus as an excuse. Things are still pretty bad where I live but my boyfriend wants to buy a house next year, so I'll have to have income to take some of the pressure off of him. I was planning to go back to school to pick up a trade I'm genuinely interested in and where I would get work experience, but he thinks it'd just enable me further.

Getting a job seems so impossible. I don't even have the documents you need to work in this country yet (applied for them this year, but my application has been stuck in covid limbo for months). I have degrees but they're useless humanities, I don't have any work experience, and my anxiety is so bad I vomit and faint in stressful situations. I've never gotten a reply to any of my job applications but I imagine that if I ever got an interview I'd be so anxious I'd just faint there.

Mental health professionals don't take me seriously (I have a diagnosis for my autism but they downplay it because I "seem" fine) and I no longer have the energy to chase after them and convince them to help me. My boyfriend wants to help and I'm grateful for his support, but I don't believe I have what it takes to change. I'm completely stuck.

No. 704018

Anons, give me positive motivation for getting a job.
The way I see it is like this:
>having a min wage job is not different than being neet wrt how people treat you. in people's eyes the min wage worker is the same as the homeless people outside
>being a wageslave is just being a neet with extra steps
>the only jobs I can get involve talking to people, I don't want people looking at me and judging me
>a job will not bring the incredible change people like to talk about, things will be the same but with more stress
>I can't go to college (and I have already dropped out for financial reasons)
Negative motivation doesn't work because I'm not afraid of becoming homeless or anything similar. It's all the same.

No. 704035

There's literally no other motivation to get a job than money.
Everything else a job gives you can get with a fulfilling hobby or activity. It's just about the money. You won't get your kick in the butt. It's take it or leave it.

No. 704307

Like other anon said, money. My face is partly why I'm neet, so I work to get money to fix it (masks make working much easier). It doesn't give you the life's kick in the butt, but atleast it keeps you from slipping back into poor habits.

No. 704314

>I have degrees but they're useless humanities, I don't have any work experience.
I feel so bad for some of you anons who put down the worth of your degrees just because that's what you've heard by an online echo chamber that stands to benefit from you passing up opportunities you don't think you qualify for.
You have transferable skills, you have an education. While it will take more tailoring, you absolutely can create a narrative that demonstrates how your skills match a job description. If you're not already doing it, make sure you copy and paste the job description into your resume and personalize it by applying anything relevant you may have done throughout your education.
Wrote an essay? Then you utilized computer software to write correspondence and reports.
Worked in a group? Then you've collaborated projects and are a communicative team player.
Stood in front of a classroom? Then you've presented research and answered questions.
It's not extrapolation, you just need to know how to frame your experience. Also look into ATS and other forms of employment application trickery that make shit easy for employers, even qualified candidates don't get far if they don't understand how modern application systems work. Failing that, pay a service to rework your resume for you.
The missing work docs will be your biggest hurdle but you could use this time to craft a very convincing resume that's not bullshit.

t. BA and MA degree anon who currently works alongside BS degree holders and engineers

No. 704327

This is genuinely so fucking helpful. Thank you so much.

No. 704527

anon if it helps, have you considered cleaning jobs? i did housekeeping to avoid having to interact with people as much. you do to get trained and stuff but thats it, after that you get to work by yourself and i listened to music/podcasts/youtube all day every day tbh. it helped me leave my NEET phase

No. 704917

Oh ok. I always thought that your job is supposed to give your life meaning and while I guess it's true for some, it doesn't click for me.
Thanks, I'll look into it.

No. 722685

I think my customer service job is making me get bpd or some shit. I'm depressed when I have to go, elated when I leave, and on my off days I either stay in bed or am fuming almost to the point of picking fights just for an excuse to fight.

I don't think I can keep doing this, but I also don't want to quit because that would be going backwards on my progress. And parents believe "tHeReS nO gOiNg BaCk OnLy FoRwArD"

No. 722720

Well, your parents aren’t wrong. The curse or “working for a living” painfully continues for the rest of your life, sadly.
Can you not change your job to something else? Maybe work at a cafe? Customer service jobs can be very draining if you hate every aspect of the job.

No. 723350

File: 1611701121373.jpeg (11.19 KB, 189x267, download.jpeg)

Welfare is generous enough in this country that I can spend my day helping my family with their gardens, do a little cash work and lease out my spare bedrooms and still cover my mortgage and bills. It's actually unbelievable that I'm getting $1,600 a month plus another $1,200 from the bedrooms I lease out.

If I planned on having kids, I'd get back out and work (if I could). But there's realistically no reason for me to ever get a job again. Every year I'm making around $30,000 in capital on my house and interest rates are just going lower and lower (I'm paying 5.4% atm, but come October I'll be set around 2-3% and will have an extra $100 to play with a week).

I think the trick to NEETdom is to get rid of all screens. I took a crowbar to my computer after using it 14 hours a day during Covid and regressed back to a dumbphone. I'm doing 6-8 hours of tasks a day, but it's in the form of baking, landscaping, helping family and lockpicking (a hobby). The only hard spot is at nights where I'm a bit lonely and there's nothing to do.

It's specific to australia and New Zealand, pic related really helped me a lot. If you read through it and apply everything that's applicable to your life, you'd be able to live the same life as a minimum wage worker but with the freedom of NEETdom. Scrounging money and cashies is much more psychologically satisfying than working a menial job. Of course the ideal is to get a career, but if you've got psychological problems like me and you struggle to hold jobs (I was making $80,000 a year on oil and gas sites before severe mental illness made it so I couldn't hold a job for long) then NEETdom + no screens + hobbies + financial discipline is the way to go.

No. 723355

My previous job made me feel exactly the same, it was horror, eventually I felt brave enough and went for a change and it was infinitely better. I hope you can find something else for yourself too, like >>722720 said, maybe not customer service related?

No. 723359

Welfare is for poor people, you don't sound poor to me.

No. 723362

>you'd be able to live the same life as a minimum wage worker but with the freedom of NEETdom.
*in aussieland
In my country welfare is $400+rent is autonatically paid that is not allowed to be over $500, any credit contracts are rejected and any extra money you make is being taken unless you get off welfare.

No. 723429

>you'd be able to live the same life as a minimum wage worker but with the freedom of NEETdom
You're living a vastly different life than most welfare recipients by owning property.

No. 723432

I'm looking but it's unlikely with rona right now. I want to ask for less hours but they keep putting me for lots because we lost 2 ppl recently. It's so uncomfy every week to ask for less.

No. 723435

>killed all your black mirrors
>switch back to a non-smart phone
>owns a house
>posting on lolcow

No. 723447

That's what I noticed too lmao. Did you post this from the library or some shit, op?

No. 723586


I hate grubby landlords who soak up all their tenants money like moldy kitchen sponges.

No. 728867

Posting from the library yeah, I need to run an advert to get another renthog in so here I am.

That's the way nature works. Rentpiggies and taxpiggies pay, NEETs and landlords relax.

No. 728868

i escaped NEET life by realizing my family would die one day and I couldn't rely on them anymore. so i forced myself to get a job so i wouldnt be even more of a fucking burden

No. 728888

I was heading down the NEET route and then I got the news that my mom was dying..I realised that living alone with my dad would be fucking hell. That motivated me to get up and go be an adult.

A year later my mom was dead and my dad sold the house and moved to the absolute middle of nowhere. Glad I got out.

No. 728947

Now I've been a NEET for 3 years. Current strategy is just applying to everything, from factory jobs to stocking to HR assistant roles. I haven't had a job for so long I think this year is going to be pivotal for me, I will either turn it around or start to rot

No. 731354

File: 1612579529287.jpeg (135.33 KB, 749x652, B1B30BE3-F5AE-40D5-831F-506114…)

What kind of job is best if you have chronic migraines and depression (pretending the pandemic isn't a barrier)
When I look this up it recommends things horrible for these conditions, like computer jobs (makes head worse) and ones where you are your own boss (unwise if you have depression)
I'm in online school but plagued by migraines I just wanted to stop being a NEET. I wish I simply didn't exist

No. 731411

No job, sorry. Unless you consider s*x work work. Hope you can find the source of your migraines.

No. 731414

Daaaamn thx. I actually was thinking earlier "if only I was a thot!" hahaha but no. It'll get better I hope…

No. 731417

Art modeling at colleges, maybe? You get paid to change poses for a couple hours.

No. 731419

that is something I never thought of, thank you for this creative idea. I will look into that as something for now

No. 731423

I was a NEET from March 2020 - September 2020. I was technically in school but I couldn't study online due to my ADHD and flunked all of my classes. I then found an underpaid internship and moved, but I got fired due to drama involving COVID.

Then by luck I found another position working in a school as a tutor. This is actually the perfect position for me because it's pretty easy and low stress. My boss doesn't really look over what I do and I have plenty of time during the day to surf the web or even browse lolcow. It still doesn't pay well but it's really chill and I get a scholarship if I finish my contract. I am pretty sure anyone here could work this job as long as they're ok with getting up early to show up on time and they don't mind working with kids.

My advice is you never know what you can find. The key to getting a job is just keep applying to stuff. The saying you make your own luck is partially true.

No. 731445

I dunno if a switch flipped in my brain or what, cause when I was just a few years younger I would call in to work and impulse quit frequently, and just be a jobless neet, but now I’ve been working nearly every day, have maintained one job for 2 yrs now and another for almost half a year, and very rarely have to call in. God bless me for easing off being a dumb bitch. Still a hermit, but being out of the house all the time makes me feel like a living being.

No. 770138

I got into grad school so now I'm outta NEETdom fuck yeah anons

No. 770145

I love that for you, congrats!!!

No. 770147

Yay, congrats!!!

No. 770153

Annons I'm so happy. Been a NEET for years between 2014-2019. Impulsively decided to hop on a course to become a pastry chef, diidn't really think it would lead anywhere. I'm now (since yesterday) employed for the first time in my life, doing something I love, my colleagues are amazing and everything is so great. I honestly never thought I'd ever be able to have a normal life, and suddenly.. Here I fucking am!

No. 770155

File: 1616771824276.jpeg (37.44 KB, 373x383, FD668155-F7A5-496D-A3C2-17C561…)

I’m so proud of you, anon! Congratulations!

No. 770176

File: 1616774904744.jpeg (38.82 KB, 324x384, 1607269563405.jpeg)

Thx girlies, I appreciate it <3

No. 770579

Congrats, anon! That's fantastic!

No. 771949

File: 1617026343328.jpg (519.85 KB, 1024x936, gettyimages-639764102-1024x102…)

I don't wanna be a NEET anymore, I'd like to go to college but my ADHD brain is not sure where to even begin. Should I just start applying to places that interest me?
I graduated in 2019 but I unfortunately got really bad grades in the last portion of HS because of my parents' abuse and spending all my time sleeping through depression, so I don't really want to toss my money out the window for the application fees if they're just going to reject me for my shitty GPA. I do have a few academic achievements from AP courses and an okay SAT score but I'm not sure if those still count.

No. 771954

Why not try a semester at a community college first? It will give you a chance to reacquaint with school life and make some good grades to show the universities. Figure out how many classes you can handle, and what schedule works for your health: day or night class, online or irl, etc. The last you want to do is getting accepted somewhere great then fail to keep up.
If you took AP you may get to test out of a couple of boring prerequisite courses, saves a bunch of money there.
It's great that you're thinking about it!

No. 771985

Are there any legit jobs that you can do at home? Or any ones that require being around people 24/7 like grocery retail?

No. 772052

You can transcribe videos on sites like Rev.com but those are really hard to apply to. If you have any skill on Photoshop or Illustrator you could do jobs on those crowdsourcing design sites like 99designs or Designcrowd, they have pretty low standards. If you're a bit more skilled you could take up freelance jobs on ODesk or Upwork

No. 772088

I was doing for a couple months, I had a part time job, I was reading/studying at my own pace, excercising and I felt I was near normalcy, then I had a really bad day and I didn't wanna go to work and so I stayed home, and I stayed home the next day and that was 3 months ago

I have stopped exercising, reading and just doing anything productive, I don't even play games I like

I think I may be autistic and I feel like I don't do thing in an exact order my entire week is ruined and I have to restart everything,

I just wished I didn't exist

No. 778132

File: 1617815681417.jpg (146.78 KB, 850x950, Coco.full.2287713.jpg)

I'm not NEET but I feel like this thread is for me because I work from home on commission and am barely scraping by.
Have any of you tried to just obstain from using the internet and your phone completely?
I think the only way to manage my busienss successfully is to go so full in on it than I sacrifice a lot of other interests, but I'm afraid of getting burned out.

But, if I don't do this, there's a possibility I made not be able to get by. Like I'll have to grind to survive and currently I'm doing less than the bare minimum.

No. 789165

I'm NTA but I saw this post and applied to a remote job and actually got it so thanks for giving me the inspiration. I'm not a NEET anymore, yay

No. 835025

I'm not a neet anymore (part time job) but how do you hide from other ppl the fact that you had a neet period? What kind of lie do you tell that doesn't backfire? People automatically lose all respect for you if you admit to being a neet.

No. 835028

Say you were taking care of an elderly/sick relative

No. 835114

It’s been a year and I haven’t escaped my neetdom, also my gov bucks are drying up and the only income I make is from babysitting my almost a year-old nephew. I’m gonna be so sad to let him go once I start school…

No. 835214

I stopped caring if people perceive me as an untermensch because of my neetdom. Imo it tells more about them than about me.

Anyway I'm going to have a job in a few days. Super scared but also excited. Yesterday I started uglycrying because it's so scary to me but also I got a feeling of self worth and being proud of me which I had not for a very long time.

No. 835235

I gave up hiding the fact I'm a former NEET, like >>835214 said: if you're judged negatively it says more about them than you. There's nothing inherently shameful about NEETdom, normies are just conditioned into thinking they're superior. Just own it, if anything I'd say it's a good thing since it shows that you pulled yourself out of that hole. I think the language we use to talk about it makes a difference though, don't become shy when mentioning it. Say something like "Yeah, I was a NEET, it's actually harder than you'd think but I got my shit together and now I'm really happy that I overcame it".

No. 835246

So uh yeah I have an interview tomorrow and if it goes well I'll have one more and I am truly scared shitless. Part of me wants to run away from it all and stay a neet but the fact that I'm being offered an interview feels like an honour in itself
I don't even know what I want as a long term career but I just have to do something now
Fuck. Just end my life. Why do we have to work to live

No. 835365

I know the feeling. The truth is, the more interviews you do, the less nervous you're gonna be because it's just one of the many interviews
>I don't even know what I want as a long term career
That's perfectly valid. Try to cultivate the mindset that you're the one in power in the interview. Does the company fit your expectations? What can they offer you? You don't have to feel like a victim when it comes to job searching

No. 835582

File: 1624314836235.jpeg (51.39 KB, 500x667, 85B5ED4A-F941-4849-8A99-D1F614…)

I applied to a retail job wish me luck fellow neeties

the pay might be pretty good because of the unemployment problem in burger country

I'm scared and socially inept but hope I get it

No. 835619

>>835028 is good. You could also say you were freelancing or taking a gap year or travelling.

You got this anon! Just keep calm and remember that they wouldn't give you an interview if they didn't think you were worth hiring.

No. 845814

File: 1625428299994.png (216.74 KB, 559x311, Screen-Shot-2016-03-23-at-10.3…)

It's been a few months after I got a part time job as customer service and I think I'm going to quit. I feel just as depressed, but now more exhausted dissociated and easily triggered. I know my parents are going to be mad but I just can't keep going. Even working one day a week is too much. Its like I'm developing bpd. How do you handle slipping back like this?

No. 845816

It can be hard on anyone to work retail, see if there are less public facing roles you can take. I did data entry as an admin assistant when I was in school and it was a very chill job and I would even be excited to go to work sometimes.

No. 872879

Bringing the thread to the front because I started my journey back into society.
Started training to work with Social Media and so far I am doing good. Glad it's online and it's going good so far. I also found a start up to help with my project.
Haven't felt so accomplished in a year.

No. 872896

File: 1628158167693.jpg (135.22 KB, 1079x1070, 55.jpg)

That's great anon, wish you best of luck
I recently got a Job as well a couple months back, its a bit hectic and my autism makes it difficult but I'm happy that I have one and my boss is pretty understanding

No. 873487


Well done, anons, good luck to you both!

No. 874444

Made it through the second week. And I feel so good today.

Thank you! Glad to hear it's also going good for you anon. You're lucky with your boss, makes it easier to stay employed and motivated.

Thank you!

No. 876885

I've been a NEET for a few years but next month I finally start university! It's a four-year course, with one year spent abroad, so I'm pretty nervous but I'm excited to have a proper purpose in life again.

Congrats nonnies, I'm sending you good vibes! The ladies in this thread inspire me.

No. 876908

Good luck anon, also think of trying for some extra activity or group club like sports or niche hobby, its a good way to meet friends and socialize

No. 876913

File: 1628517308483.jpg (14.23 KB, 306x300, gg.jpg)

Good luck anon, also can trying joining some clubs for sports or niche hobbies, its a good way to meet friends and socialize

No. 877865

The main reason why I want to get out of NEETdom is that I'm scared of my parents falling into something like QAnon and going insane. They're already conspiracy-minded so I could easily see them falling for something like that now that they spend way more time online due to the lockdowns. I've read the QAnon casualty stories and how quickly boomers fall for it and their entire personality radically changes, and I don't want to be stuck in a house with them if it happens.

No. 877921

How do they go insane? All I can think of is they buy canned for prepping or something.

No. 878120

Anon that year abroad will be amazing, be sure to live it up as much as possible (and save up beforehand!). Work as much as you need to beforehand so you can really enjoy it.

Now for my own rant as a near-former NEET, in a month I'll be starting my Masters at a ginormous school and coming from a tiny college it's honestly terrifying. I've got some involvement within my department already but stuff like socializing and dating scare me a lot. I know I have to push myself a bit out of my comfort zone with socializing to get over the fear BUT how do you get rid of the fear of dating when the majority of men are utter shit? I'm particularly anxious to befriend men after my freshman yr of undergrad where I was assaulted by my former guy friend. I really just can't trust men whether they're a friend or boyfriend. I want nothing to do with them but I'm in a male dominated field fml.

No. 878197

I've been job hunting for 3 weeks now, and I finally had an interview. I really hope I get called about a 2nd one but I'm very discouraged after so many rejections.
Some days I feel so ready to be a part of society and dream about getting a decent job, eventually get promoted, finally having money to afford fun stuff and not just groceries. I didn't think it'd be so difficult.

No. 886647

File: 1629427960471.jpg (60.64 KB, 1024x576, planetes3.jpg)

I got a job, 18/hr with a long fucking commute, and worked it devoutly for a week before my sister got COVID.
We're vaccinated, but she still definitely woke up with no sense of smell. We're on eating-off-the-same-plate levels of personal nonquarantine by default too. Do I tell these fuckers I've got the rona or just lie and hope one of them bites the dust to up my job security? I can work from home in this position, but like, I don't know if they'll let me do that one week into training.
That being said! I was going to post here on friday to proudly announce I've unneeted myself for exactly a week! Step one, ladies!

No. 886657

Go get tested and either work or isolate depending on the result? Is that not the standard procedure when you have contact with someone who has covid?

No. 886702

I claw my way out but I always fall back down the NEET hole. Does it ever get easier? I try to fake it until I make it always ends in some spectacular breakdown and I end up in a worse place than I started and the shame only ever gets worse. I got myself to a point where I had a job with my own office and a nice apartment downtown. Everyone was so proud of me but I was suffocating under the pressure of even getting up in the morning. I like being productive, I like working towards a goal but I can't keep it together. It always blows up in my face and I feel pathetic for trying.

No. 887878

I hate how the pandemic destroyed any progress I made. Quit my part time grocery job because there were just way too many unhinged and cruel customers. Lockdown seems like it will never end so there's a sense of "why try?". And I got long covid (the fun memory issues side effect) so going back to school seems even more impossible. I'm just so tired of trying and ending up back where I started.

No. 887879

>suffocating under the pressure of even getting up in the morning. I like being productive, I like working towards a goal but I can't keep it together. It always blows up in my face and I feel pathetic for trying.
Was it just the job that you hated anon? Or the sudden huge change from neet to full functioning adult?

No. 887986

I have a 2h/day job now and its pretty comfy. My boss and colleagues are cool and no stress. I can just call in and say I'm not feeling good and I don't have to work. Working in a pedagogical field, most of the people working there are absolute shitheads but I'm lucky. Very understanding boss who knows I'm not completely right in my head but he works resources oriented and wants me to feel good. Other people telling me I have to work full time and I'm a lazy piece of shit but man, I'm so proud that I was able to escape full time neetdom they can all shut up. A huge plus is I don't have to tell people I meet that I am doing nothing. Eventho they can kindly fuck off when they are offended by neets. I do love you no matter how lazy or crazy you are

No. 888021

Anons, aren't you scared of not being able to survive on Neetdom long term? As in your parents passing away or your partner leaving or whoever's funding your neetdom essentially disappearing. I was a Neet for a while (not long, less than a year) and my main motivator to keep working on becoming independent (besides neetdom making me feel terrible) was knowing that my parents aren't going to be around forever to support my lifestyle (not that I would want to burden them any further than I already did even if they'd live forever). What would I do then, when they pass away and I have nothing to bring food on the table or pay for shelter and nowhere else to go? How are you all planning to go about that? How do you envision your future?

No. 888036

suicide dummy

No. 888041

I live on disability and I have a brother. Also I’ve been thinking about becoming a transcriptionist and trying to work at home for extra cash. Right now however I’m extremely depressed and I’m having physical health issues that need to be addressed and COVID is making moving forward very difficult.

I am terrified every day.

No. 888063

I was a housebound agoraphobic in my teens and I feared getting stuck as a perma neet. I really pushed myself, got out at 19 and was scraping by just to make ends meet.

A year later my mom died and my dad up and sold the house, moved to the absolute middle of nowhere and he's living off all his savings with the attitude of 'well you can't take it with you' I'm glad I kicked my ass into gear when I did.

No. 888111

i don't necessarily wanna be a freeloading neet my whole life but my parents set me up that i can if i need to

No. 888113

No. 888783

When my parents got too old I started living with my brother and his family, we have an informal agreement where I help with some chores and take care of the kids while both of them work
its not as bad as it sounds, I get along great with my sister-in-law whose very understanding , the chores take no more then 2 Hours and I genuinely love the kids
we have never discussed what happens next, I'm honestly scared of that conversation but for now our situation works

No. 889681

I honestly loved that job and my breaking down at that job happened in my late 20s. I'd already had other jobs and struggled with NEETdom before that as well.

No. 899533

NEETs how do you explain the large gap of not working? I've been neeting for a while and i'm ready to get back out there with a friend of mines who has NEVER worked and they are going on 25.
What are the best jobs for former Neets without any skills?

No. 904556

I'm hearing about the record high labour shortages constantly yet I still can't get any replies back for my minimum wage job applications. I thought this was going to be the best time to escape NEETdom but I guess not for me.

No. 904565

I'm so tired of hearing about labor shortages after how hard it was for me to find a job, and when I finally did it was a low paying job.

my only advice would be to apply for temporary positions because they are more likely to hire you. once you've worked there for a while apply for a permanent job, they are more likely to contact you if they see you already have a job. that's what I did.

anyway, good luck

No. 904634

The "just go in with your resume" isn't a meme anymore since pandemic started, my last 2 jobs I did that and was hired on the spot. Maybe give it a try? I went to places with help wanted signs on the door.

No. 914247

Okay, I really need some help with something related to my NEETdom. My doctor and my therapist won't do anything about it (doctor only asked if I ate socially, I live alone, therapist 'can't give advice') but I rapidly lost the will to eat about a year ago. I don't think it was to do with my shitty mental health but now I'm in a really bad way. I swear I'm not an ana-chan. I've been struggling to climb the stairs out of weakness for months and I just won't meal prep or eat because staying in bed is easier. The constant hunger is probably why I'm on stomach ulcer tablets and it makes me want to eat even less. Life is passionless and painful and now food is taken from me. How do I get my appetite back? I'm not suicidal most of the time and this is NOT how I want to go.

No. 914258

File: 1631831407407.png (633.11 KB, 771x807, 1576776781876.png)

I'm not a part of this thread , but I I need ot tell you this because I had a nightmare of a fucking time trying to get help eating when I got diabetic gastroparesis. I am not being a cunt or funny or anything, smoke marijuana.
I was run through the fucking wringer when I got gastroparesis, they tried every miserable fucking drug on me and I swear to christ every one of them made the pain worse or the nausea worse or both
The only thing that has ever actually helped and worked long enough for the ulcers in my stomach to heal was smoking weed. If you don't tell your doctor, they won't ask. Medicine is a bullshit industry.

No. 914263

Though you are right that it increases appetite, I would absolutely not recommend smoking weed to someone who is both NEET and suffering from mental health issues. It can become a crutch and actually do more harm than good making it harder for them to escape their current situation. Treating 1 symptom is not worth that risk.

No. 914270

Well she should still know about it in case it ever gets down to "I am going to die if I cannot eat"

No. 914273

NTA but as someone dealing with basically the same issue (losing weight due to disinterest in food without being anorexic) I will say that smoking weed doesn't make me want to eat, even though it eventually makes me feel hungry. It actually acts as an appetite suppressant sometimes. Not being hungry isn't the issue, it's not having the desire to eat. I smoke way too frequently though so that may be part of it. Hopefully it could work for that anon if they try it, but it may end up causing more issues.

No. 914279

File: 1631832800676.jpg (53.64 KB, 680x383, EeKBa2cU4AA6_NQ.jpg)

I finally got off my ass and got a job after 4 years of neetdom, but instead of being smart about it, I got a job as a holiday clerk at the post office because I was too afraid to decline. I'm out of shape as shit and it's 50+ hours a week.

How fucked am I nonnies?

No. 914291

I didn't have it as bad as you, but I also lost desire to eat while depressed and it made everything spiral until I just slept all day for weeks. Do you have the funds to order food? Does it physically hurt to eat? If it hurts you can start with simple things like canned soup and bread. Cooking feels impossible when you're that exhausted, so make it easy for yourself. Any food is better than no food, even simple microwave crap. Take baby steps and you'll get there. I know it's obvious and stupid, but what helped me was truly realizing that I felt less shitty if I ate. More energy, less brain fog, less pain, better mood. Fixing my diet was the catalyst for curing my depression. These days when I feel bad I think of what I last ate, and almost always realize I haven't eaten enough that day.

No. 914301

You're going to be absolutely fucking exhausted but you'll probably feel better about yourself at the very least. I went from many years of neetdom to working in a pack/ship place around the holidays so I know what it's like. It's not easy but I had way better self esteem because of it. Thankfully post offices don't take a lot of heavy parcels and you're not responsible for packaging people's shit, so as long as you can stand for a long time and communicate clearly, you should be okay. Good luck anon and keep us updated, I'm proud of you.

No. 914311

Yeah I told them, and that's how I got on these ulcer tablets. I hate smoking though and sorry but I have stoner prejudice because I live in a bad neighbourhood where their vapours gets into my home every couple days. Maybe I'd get some edibles to take the edge off my anxiety but I don't even know where you get that with no contacts. Not ruling out CBD oil based things.

>being called she for once on the internet

Now this is why I come to lolcow, I'm so fucking tired of stealthing to avoid muh tits or gtfo

Eating hurts, yeah. I'm trying to appreciate the advice but the same boring stuff every day seems to be part of the problem. I'm not even interested when I get myself junk food, the only reason left to eat is staving off the hunger and pain so I can focus in games. Gonna see if there's baby steps I can take in other directions though, thanks.

Ain't got advice but I'm glad you'll be getting an income.

No. 914317


Retail or fast food. Where all the other people with gaps in their resumes and no skills go for.

they also won't care as much about the resume gaps.

No. 914330

but i'm very shy, I kind of want to get into a cleaning like job where I can be on my own and clean, IDK. My dream job would be just…a task that I can do with very little interaction with other people.
Like restocking or something.

No. 914331

my biggest reasons for Neetdom is that I'm shy, like I can deal with people but only certain people. I have a lot of aniexty, I just want a job and to be normal

No. 914343

you get over it once you start doing it (at work anyway). i was paralyzed with fear at my first customer service job when i was in high school, but once you put it into perspective that your job is just getting paid to interact with people it takes the edge off.

No. 914350

I really really hope so thank you for this cause I need to hear this, I just think everyone thinks like me, notices every detail, will know when I'm nervous, that I'm a NEET and I'm insecure, I have to put myself out there, because I need money, I need my own fucking life.

No. 914352

Tysm!! I'm already feeling better knowing I have a job, plus it's good motivation to finally start exercising again so I don't die on my first day.

I know how you feel. Honestly, interacting with people is the easiest hurdle to jump. Being loud/assertive is the real hard part. Especially if you're working in food or retail where you have to yell or ask your coworkers for help. I always get those paranoid thoughts that they're all secretly laughing at me for asking a basic question, you just gotta push through it even though it's hard as hell some days.

No. 914354

I know! i feel like if I get a job I will push through it, I just gotta do it. Get over myself. Just think, "nobody cares about you". I think in black and white sometimes, like if things aren't good they are the worst, if one person thinks something bad of me I think everyone does.
I just don't feel like I can, but I want too and I feel like I will. I have too.

No. 914473

I'm inbetween NEETdom and a job atm. My job's not paying me but they're paying me in company stock. Thanks boss.

No. 914532

is that… legal?

No. 914628

File: 1631882058302.jpg (160.5 KB, 566x571, IMG_2872.JPG)

I've been a NEET ever since I dropped out of high school years ago. After years of putting it off I'm finally studying to get my GED and even started seeing a therapist, but even then I’ve become so used to NEETdom after so long that I’m terrified of reintegrating back into society. I’ve thought about going to college after I get my GED but I’m scared I won’t be able to keep up with it and drop out again like I did in high school, and I don’t wanna work either. I don’t have any goals or dreams. Nothing interests or excites me anymore. At this point I feel like my only path in life is to continue being a NEET and keep leeching off my parents until I commit sudoku.

No. 914652

As a successful former NEET I strongly advise against Collage unless its related to a subject that strongly interests you, Collage will likely burn you out and you'll get back into a Rut
what you need to start is just a small part time Job, nothing with too much responsibility as baby steps
also maybe start going to Church, I'm 100% an ashiest but going to Church makes me feel "purer" I guess and helps me relax, try weening off most media, maybe try non-fiction Audio books or historical podcasts and lastly a sport or hobby can be a literal life saver for some of

Listen I've tried and failed but I got out of my Rut, I'm married and am truly happy now, I want to help others who were like me

No. 914724

It's only for a few months, until they get these investors to start giving lots of money to us again. Although my boss/friend just told me that's going to happen quite soon. I even said, "Ah sweet, now I can start getting paid."

No. 915517

File: 1631934775018.gif (127.07 KB, 200x165, 516516566616516.gif)

Every time I go outside I feel like killing myself because of how much anxiety and disappointment I feel. I don't think I'll ever have a normal, and I don't care about it anymore. I wish I could live as an useless shut in forever, or that I felt bad enough to kill myself

No. 915579

Should a person who can't correctly spell 'college' really be giving advice about education, kek?

No. 915587

start with baby steps
I'm an ESL and where I'm from we call 'college' university

No. 917445

I've escaped NEETdom and I'm starting my first ever job which is in fast food tomorrow. Any advice for me?

No. 917447

A few weeks until I'm officially out of neetdom. It feels weird. A part of me doesn't want to leave because I have no idea how I'll manage to function back in society again, but the bigger part of me knows that I HAVE to do this now if I ever want a chance at a normal (or somewhat normal) life. If this doesn't work out I'll just an hero lol

No. 917466

stick at it for as long as you can so you can have something you've done for a solid amount of time on your resume. learn as much as you can so you have the option to take on more responsibility later down the line if you want to. find coping mechanisms for stressful days, for example it sounds dumb af but when I feel overwhelmed on busy days I like to pretend I'm in a video game trying to get a high score for cleaning tables or whatever. it helps me embrace the novelty of service work and not get too bogged down. most of all remember that you should be super proud of yourself for escaping NEETdom - good luck nonnie; I believe in you!

No. 918013

fast food is your best chance at moving up into better jobs, I started in higher ranking jobs with higher qualifications and still struggled to find other jobs unlike my friends who had worked in fast food 6 months+ and were being considered in better jobs because of the "fast-paced" environment of fast food. You've got this anon

No. 922198

Samefag so I'm 3 days in, by the 2nd day I already knew how to do a lot of stuff like taking orders and packing food but I'm still too slow and make a lot of mistakes. At the end of the first day I was exhausted and slept for 12+ hours but now I'm getting used to being active again. I get the vibe the manager doesn't like me so after each shift I feel like crying ngl.

No. 940127

File: 1634373900215.jpg (131.89 KB, 720x566, 1626804632230.jpg)

The fact that I've had more or less actual conversation like this with my parents makes me depressed, I'm not a cutter but I go from periods of binge eating and self starvation and purging
sometimes my father gets excited for even the most basic of shit that I force myself to do and congratulates me like it's a big deal even it shouldn't be, I know he means well but I hate myself for being a burden to my family, I hate being a personal embarrassment to my mother, I hate that my siblings hide me and force me into my room when their friends come over
I just wish I was never born or that I could find some way to get out of this rut

No. 940157

Same, same, same. I feel you. I signed up for ONE class and my parents were over the moon. I swear they acted like hyperactive children for days, they were so happy. But I dropped out and let NEETdom swallow me again. I don't want to complain that my parents appreciate such small things but it makes me feel so pathetic. I'm literally binging right now about to purge and I know my mom's gonna hear it and feel sad. Fuck shit ass and god fucking damn it.

No. 940158

File: 1634381897476.jpg (99.49 KB, 473x506, 1617566551866.jpg)

I think my mother has given up hope on me, She think that everything I do and the way I act is all some part of nefarious scheme to embarrass her, as If that's what all the failures in my life amount to, my dad is still hopeful
he tries the best he can despite my many failures and never forces me to do anything I don't want

No. 940306

I would like to have some conversations like these (not as extreme but just having my parents letting me know that they're proud of whatever I'm doing). I was your typical good girl with excellent grades before being a neet and I barely received their praise even then. I could never figure out what they wanted from me either, like I did as well as I could, even ignoring my own health issues. Now I'm a neet and they either ignore me most of the time or insult me kek. I wish I could tell them that I do earn money from time to time with drawings but they'd just tell me to get real jobs and how much my ex classmates are better than me now.

No. 940407

I know what you mean, no matter how well I did in everything parents never said anything and just pretended I didnt exist. But when I wasn't perfect it was constant criticism and yelling. Who wouldn't give up after years of literally no positive reinforcement. Now that I'm neet they don't ignore me as much, but they still criticise every little thing.

No. 940438

Damn are you guys me

No. 940443

That sounds emotionally exhausting. And sometimes it’s best to avoid exhausting people. Diaries work wonders, and although there’s no pleasing anyone, I know having a hard to please parent has motivated me to do my best

No. 940452

I think it's natural to seek the approval of your parents, but sometimes they just can't be pleased.

No. 940455

File: 1634410611729.jpg (57.43 KB, 750x670, 1633712791337.jpg)

describes my interactions with my mother, my father still has some hope in me and would be happy even If I had a lower middle income job based on my interests or even just a hobby with friends, as long I could be somewhat happy but my mother never had any expectations for me to begin with, she's always viewed me as a disappointment and thinks I'm a neet only to personally embarrass her
every conversation is about her
idk what to, I'm honestly scared of her and she's even tried to hit me a couple times, now that quarantine is ending my dad's started going to work more and my siblings are going back to school, so now I'm alone with her all day
sometimes she just barges in my room and starts venting at me about all her issues in my life and how I'm such a horrible daughter for not supporting her, I know lock my room's door but she still starts screaming so outside the door

No. 948174

How long does it take to get used to working? I'm only part time but I still can't relax on my days off because I'm dreading having to go back.

No. 948218

Wtf I'm actually jealous of the support

No. 948531

Gotta love the "mother feels entitled to treat daughter like therapist" shit

No. 948534

File: 1635092767250.jpg (34.54 KB, 201x275, 1634473589985.jpg)

Not to be discouraging but I never got used to it. I'd put up with it for a few months and then break down and quit when I couldn't handle it anymore.

No. 948535

I agree, it's something to be grateful for instead of being a miserable bitch about. Very few parents are happy just from their child's presence or efforts.

No. 948539

This. Never ever got used to it, I'd sit in my monotonous job and scream internally to the point of silently breaking down in my cubicle. Would use my leave as soon as I'd earn it. I try to stay 6 months and then take a break and find a new job. I'm quitting mine in 10 days. My only issue is health insurance because I have a lot saved otherwise. I look forward to these NEET breaks more than anything else.

No. 948711

I feel you, and I don't think I can do this forever. Every time becomes harder and harder. I don't think I'd mind being self sustainable working dusk till dawn if it means I get to be left alone and not be killed inside with this shit cycle.

No. 949634

I quit after 1 month because I can't handle it, it's just too much stress for me especially working during a lunch rush makes me suicidal. Plus my co-workers are cliquey and always gossiping and give me dirty looks. I autistically quit over text message and then blocked my manager right after I sent the text. I'm going to try to get a job in a retail store now instead of fast food because I think I could handle that better.

No. 949658

I feel really bad and suicidal. I can speak 3 languages, I have one degree and I possess a wide variety of information on different subjects, but despite that I have only been able to work minimum wage jobs like in retail. I don't get how people get the good jobs. I'm convinced I lack part of the narcissism needed to get through with life. I've been NEET for one year because I cannot get out of the minimum wage cuck slave thing. I'm also conventionally beautiful. I just want to make money without sucking someone's dick (metaphorically speakig). I've been terminally online for the past year and observing online celebrities and how they make money and they're all fucking frauds and it's getting to me. The world makes no sense. Even models now are ugly and they just become famous off faking things and manipulation. Communists are so rich kids like Hasan Abi that are uncultured millionaires. The world is really unfair and upside down, I wanna end it. Life gave me a set of apparently valuable tools that actually have no value.

No. 949670

I've really been thinking about dabbling in the idea of being an airline pilot. I'm too afraid to tell anybody about this dream and the only way i can pursue it is to take a hefty loan.

But right now, i've been struggling with the fact that my parents forced me to go to school when my mental health was in hell and I had no idea what i was doing. So much time and money has been wasted because the mental health services i was receiving was shit and it's only now that i am finally making progress and feel like i can achieve what i want in life in some capacity. I have been doing stupid wage cuck jobs and dealing with the fact that listening to my parents instead of common sense has ruined my chances at getting a full degree. I can only get an associates degree without fucking myself over and I am close to fucking that up too. I probably won't even be able to get a job that pays 40k-50k a year with it which was my main ambition right now so i can finally try to move out. Being 30 and being yelled at by my parents while my life is stagnant is such a depressing thought, i just want my life to move forward.

No. 949672

At first i found working 4 hours for two days a week to be hell. Looking back now that i work 12 hour shifts is something. tbh, you never get used to working. Just focus on why you are going to work, it's about money. Think about how nice it feels every payday and that your suffering was worth it, that's what helps me personally.

No. 950291

so, kinda recovering neet but man i hate it. moved out of my mums house in the summer and since then everything has just been shit - binging and purging all the time, no motivation to do anything, no friends in college (or at all really). I was so much happier at home, sure i was a pathetic loser but at least i didn't feel so alone and suicidal. I really want to drop out

No. 950298

I love the idea of being a pilot, it's just too expensive and competitive though. Have you considered train driving instead? In my country they get really good pay and I assume the preliminary hiring process would test for similar skills as pilots without all the risk and expense.

No. 950311

Me too nonnerino. Not the being a trilingual hottie part, but the world feels unfair these days, cruel and cold and pointless.

I try to remember why I want to stay, to go back to my favourite mountain, to make friends, to lift others up and find freedom. And NEETing gets pretty lonely.
So far to cure loneliness, I talk to old ladies I don't know, walked into a meeting that I wasn't invited to, went out with my cousin, and read really good books. So before you can find yourself in a place full of people, these may tide you over. But yeah, when I feel low, and there's no one to distract me from my thoughts, it's bad. Sometimes you just need a glass of milk and a nice hot bath to get you through it all.

No. 950330

Seconding >>950298 where I am the national train company (whateveritscalledinenglish) pays for your education. Definitely worth looking into.

No. 950349

I never thought about becoming one and I would have to move really far to get that job. The pay looks appealing but I am not very passionate about it. Thank you for the suggestion anyways.

No. 952654

What are your experiences with working overnight? Will I get hired easier as a NEET? I have a really hard time maintaining a day time sleep schedule and feel more alive at night which I suspect is part of ADHD so I’m considering overnight work.

No. 952741

Graveyard shifts are generally considered undesirable so it’ll be easier to get hired for one than for an equivalent day job.

No. 952788

Go for it, it's incredibly easy to get accepted for the job because nobody wants it. It's actually pretty easy to get used to the schedule.

No. 952857

I fucking love overnight work, twice the pay for half the work and when all the stores, salons, etc are open it's easy to do errands, go to the doctor, etc without it interrupting the schedule

No. 952871

How do you sleep during the day? The noise would keep me up even with ear plugs.

No. 952950

I never had any sort of issue with sleep tbh as long as if you aren't living in an apartment where the walls are thin. If you're living with other people your age those people are usually out doing their day jobs or going to school or something, if anything it's more quiet during the day

No. 956371

Its not that, I love my father and my siblings for much how they support me, I feel awful for not being able to deliver all on
failure after failure, it hurts letting down the people I love and who love me, I hate myself for being such a disappointment to them

No. 960262

File: 1636106842827.jpeg (32.82 KB, 454x675, 7BCE8240-0BF7-42ED-822A-32D1F2…)

I just had work drinks with my colleagues to celebrate one of them moving on to another role. The night before that I was at my young professionals social club, and earlier that day I had a great lunch with some other young women who work in other departments at my job. After an awkward childhood and a shitty lonely high school/college experience that left me feeling destined for NEETdom, it’s great to feel liked and wanted at the very start of my career, and this whole week has left me feeling very picrel.

No. 960456

How do you pretend to be not depressed and socially awkward when you get a job? Is there a vid you watch to get into the mood, anything. If I can't act happy and social I'm going to get fired.

No. 960507

that pasta looks cute, congrats on getting a life

they're all pretending too. even the most sociable normie is acting to a degree

No. 960682

No I mean literally how do you get in the mood to pretend to be happy

No. 960705

Honestly you can't force a mood. I don't really pretend to be happy, but I will at least be pleasant. A fake smile goes pretty far. But I don't do the bubbly thing. I've been depressed for so long that I cannot be chirpy without feeling like a fraud, so instead I do my best to be polite and interested in people, and they get used to my weird ways and dry sense of humor.

I think forcing a mood will lead to emotional burnout.

No. 960731

Benzos (for awkwardness and anxiety) + Ritalin (for energy and happiness)

No. 960738

See a doctor and try to get on some antidepressants, if you haven't already. You might also need some therapy; it's very easy to fall into negativity, thinking "god I don't want to/can't do this, why should I bother", but a combination of meds and therapy can be life-changing. It's just that you need to be the change you want to see in your life. If you want to be able to get in the mood to not be depressed, you have to work towards your goal yourself. Meds and other shit won't help if you don't want to take initiative.

No. 960866

Samefag and I got rejected. A fast food place in a "labor shortage" won't hire me to work their overnight shift even though I'm more than willing. Clown world.

No. 960871

a lot of places won't hire women to work the night shift nonnie, it's a liability thing

No. 960895

I hated working overnight eventually. It starts off pretty good but after a year I felt like I was going insane and was an alien in the world. I took the overnight shift because I didn't care about seeing people or so I thought, but eventually it even wore me down, and I'm as NEET as they come. Also if you are talking about a job working with other people? Night shift workers can be a bit more fucked up than daywalkers. Like, think felons and old transvestites. That was my co-workers kek

No. 962911

Never ask for advice on Reddit. I was reading some threads posted by people in my similar situation and the normalfags on there acted like NEETs are the worst scum of the Earth and told them they will be unhireable for life just because they never had a job at 21. Anyway this week I will start going to a temp agency to help me get something.

No. 966563

File: 1636732496816.gif (260.53 KB, 500x334, 8FCD78CA-67E4-48DC-BB5B-7FBF60…)

nonnies I’m trying to leave neetdom and applied for an assistant position at a cat clinic and they actually sent me a follow up email even though I have no experience!! I really hope I get this, I worked 2 other random bs jobs and they made me miserable, I just wanna be around kitties all day.

No. 966615

File: 1636736057516.gif (4.59 MB, 480x600, Tumblr_l_395894639204290.gif)

Nice, hope it goes well

No. 966681

How do I get through to my parents that I'm not going to become a ubercareerwoman in a fucking week? I've been on and off working min wage jobs, quitting when it gets too much bc everywhere is understaffed (but they don't hire more ppl…) and everyone like to target the weak looking one. I'm working towards becoming not so depressed/openly autistic/getting a will for life, but it's going to take time, and I'm going to slide backwards some times!! Familys constant nitpicking and criticizing makes me want to just stop trying to improve because no matter what I do I'm always being shat on. When I tell them this though they act offended and like I'm "spitting on their love", as if picking someone apart it love?! Wtf do you say to these kinds of people.

No. 966689

You're not going to like this anon, but lie. Super exaggerate every single little thing that happens. Come up with a list of very small insignificant things that happen and find ways to make them seem more significant. Join pointless clubs and organizations, create a linked in, etc.

Do whatever you have to do to make it seem like you're doing more than what you are.

No. 966693

Hmm I'll try thanks, I don't know if they'll let up though because no matter how much I've tried they just keep going on about me not being good/fast enough.

No. 966977

I don't have family members trying to intervene with my career choice but my relatives do, and very intrusive when they do. My solution is just deflecting the comments/questions back to them, make shits up about my job (weewoo this influences this and that). Or the nicest way to snap back at them is questioning on Why they cant be happy for you. Bing bong don't let their insecurity project on you nonna.

No. 969791

didn’t get it because I’m a retard. Fucking idiot.

No. 970155

Sorry, nonna. You're taking the right steps, though!

No. 973892

Um so I just got hired overnight stocking the week of thanksgiving. Am I gonna die?

No. 973942

why would you die

No. 973996

Probably not, since you won't be working with customers (assuming the place you work at is not open 24 hrs)

No. 981974

File: 1638293383939.jpg (23.37 KB, 474x377, download.jpg)

Holy shit got hired at a bank call center. I still can't believe it. It's just for two months but can be expanded to more time. Nonnas, am I gonna make it? I hope I don't screw it up because I want to leave neetdoom forever.

No. 981982

No. 981985

That’s so awesome, it sounds like a real Lady McAdult career where you can use a computer and have a desk and stuff! Give it your all Lady McAdult!

No. 982023

Happy for you!!!! Looking for a decent part time job myself, and starting school in January. I really hope I don't fuck this up. I'm about to be 26 and tired of being a loser.
Take it easy and just be your best self. You've got this anon, I'm rooting for you

No. 983303

File: 1638421150339.jpg (83.04 KB, 640x640, I Felt a Funeral in My Brain b…)

Life has been so hard and this year has been the worst one of my entire life and that is including the year I nearly died after a suicide attempt. I've been a neet since 2017. I don't want to be a burden anymore and at 31 years old I'm just a living embarrassment. I feel trapped and everyday feels like a slow suicide where I just avoid my own life constantly. But I really truly do want to get better. Any advice or just encouragement for neets out of their twenties with much larger gaps in jobs/school? How do I break out of my paralysis? I wish I knew

No. 984334

I've got a part time min wage for a few months now. Yesterday parents said to figure out my finances in 3 years because they're going to sell house and move to a smaller place to retire. So I guess I'll become a girlboss, or take a long walk in the woods when times up. I'm just so tired of everything though.

No. 984338

I've been a neet since 2017, too. I keep lowering the bar of the jobs I'm applying to. Now I'm applying to stocking jobs at Walmart and shit. If I don't get hired soon I think I am going to do something crazy. I've tried employment agencies, my old college's career services, dozens of job finding sites. What makes me so undesirable? It impacts every facet of my life. People with worse qualifications than me find work faster. I have looped through so many levels of cope I feel like I'm teetering on insanity

No. 984348

I'm still in my 20s, but larp and lie as much as you can to pretend to be a normie, and makeup a sad backstory like you were taking care of your bf who had cancer and then he died, or some shit. Also with the pandemi lots of places are more likely to hire if you walk in to hand in your resume. Try places with old ppl staff bc lots of them are getting sick/dying rn.

No. 984349

File: 1638536467728.jpg (68.25 KB, 562x681, 1636139224890.jpg)

Well speaking as someone as someone whose on the spectrum and who escaped NEETdom and is somewhat normal here's all the advice I learned
you have to start our small, but also you have to gradually break certain autistic habits you may have developed, for e.g I used to refuse to use any soap that wasn't from a specific brand that I had bought personally bought from a specific neighborhood shop, this was just one limiting autstic habit that I had developed that I had to gradually get past
another thing that helped was that I deleted a lot of my social media accounts and started fresh with a new Google/Youtube account, I immediately subscribed to mostly history, skill based, book summarization and wild life channels, I also downloaded some comfort media when I was still in a partial NEET phase
just safe and non-degenerate content
I think more important then Job is getting a outside hobby or activity, something to help you start socializing
Krav Maga saved my life, it helped me grow as a person, helped me get a little more confident and I met my now boyfriend there, it helped me

While I'm not a NEET anymore, I'm still only a normiie but I'm getting there and I'm happy with the path I took

No. 984884

I've been wanting to rejoin society so I'm teaching myself how to code, but I'm too fucking stupid to actually do well at job interviews. I wish I had the drive and self confidence to be a freelancer.

No. 985272

Any advice for a non-neet who wants to help her 2 neet friends stop being neets?

I want to help them live their best lives, but any attempt to help them escape from their parents basements is met with resistance. One of them didn't talk to me for 4 months because I was "implying that it was bad to be a neet". Am I being a meddling douche? Should I just stay out of it, until (if ever) they're ready to reach out to me?

I'm willing to drive them to classes or job interviews, help them practice driving, be a reference, and accompany them to social events where they can meet new friends/potential partners.

For the record, they're both female, and neets largely because of depression and anxiety.

No. 985289

if you can't get an entrylevel service job right now then you must live somewhere weird because idk, they're hiring everybody at the grocery stores. Face tattoo guys, old ladies who talk to themselves… half the people at chipotle last time were straight up working with airpods in & texting people. That shit did NOT fly two years ago.

It's great for a NEET/autist at the moment tbh. The only reason I found a service job I liked was cause it was a small cafe that let you put on ypur own music, which was rare 5-6 years ago, but the service sector is giving employees a lot more free reign as perks now. They just dropped the uniforms at the grocery store near me too… or rather now the uniform seems to be that you can wear any sports jersey you like. Or maybe that's just the people here.

No. 985291

Speaking as a NEET who has lost friends, just leave them be. If they want to change, they will. If they don’t, they won’t. Stop caring about whether they’re NEETs or not and just enjoy their friendship. If you find you can’t do that and need to steer every interaction into “how to get better”, just fuck off with your own life.

No. 985297


Fair enough. For the sake of clarity, I'm not embarrassed that they're neets, and I don't turn every conversation into self-improvement. We mostly chat about anime, or tv shows, or whatever . I just want to help them because I like them and we've known each other for a long time.

No. 985306

samef to add that if you do keep getting rejected it may not be what you think. For example, I saw someone who kept answering the question "Do you have reliable transportation?" with "No" because they would be taking the bus. Saying "no" there is an instant autorejection but she could have jist said "yes" cause the bus does count as reliable, and if the bus turned out to be always late, idk deal with that when it comes up. As other anon said, just lie & say everything is normal for the interview. Once you're hired theyre a lot more accomodating - you could literally say "yeah I have a car" and then a week later "oh I had to give my car to my sister" they literally wont care.

Good places to work as a neet/autist imo:
Gas stations
Asian groceries & restaurants
Local coffee shops
Local ice cream stores

These all have relatively easy, mostly solo work, and they don't have that "Be a happy part of our team!!! :):):) >:)" vibe that some places have… its just if you can show up and work. pls dont ban for moticons im just quoting.

No. 987206

Are you me? We're the same age and going to school soon.
When do think you'll be working? How many hours do you plan to work a week?

No. 987966

you should try a coding boot camp at a community college, it's much easier than self disciplining yourself into learning
if you're in the US and over 24, you can apply for FASFA and have it cover your classes because it's at a community college

No. 988087

Thanks, this is unironically very helpful and puts thing into perspective. It always matters that you do SOMETHING rather than NOTHING, regardless of size

No. 988171

File: 1638923200557.jpg (297.82 KB, 843x848, c2b845e6895d1c450ceb848f8b3dbf…)

Nonnies I am so close to getting my shit together and stop being a neet once and for all, but I am freaking out. For some reason I feel so overwhelmed with the idea that I will somehow fuck it up and become unable to be constant and go back to idle neetdom. I have a list of all the stuff I gotta do so I do them on time yet I'm scared shitless, help.

No. 988173

anyone try working from home, either full or part time? i have extreme adhd that meds cant even fix, and i finally decided university isnt for me. i just have a business associates degree. being at home is excruciating but working is exhausting. has anyone found a balance where they can give into their neetdom most of the time, working the other part to support yourself and not go insane? im starting to think not everyone is suited to full time shit, but unfortunately the world doesn't exactly accommodate people like us.

No. 988183

It’s natural to be scared. You’re about to take a big step and leave behind the comfort of failure and become someone who has succeeded! That’s scary shit but it’s pretty amazing too. You’re gonna be that person who’s built themselves a whole softer landing pad miles up above the neet floor you used to be on. You get to chill all the way up there cause you earned it or you get to go even higher because you have earned the right to rise. You worked through hundreds of days of shit and now you get to soak up the sun and fresh air and all the good shit nonnie, hope you enjoy every second of your success! You earned it and deserve it

No. 988190

Damn nonny you made me emotional, I'm crying a little. Thank you. But you are absolutely right, is comfortable living in failure and scary as shit to leave that comfort but I believe you that it could be amazing. I'll do my best to enjoy it and work even harder!

No. 988197

Would like to inform you all that thanks to this thread, I’ve gone from being a total neet to getting hired and am gonna get a raise to the $23-25/hr range in the next couple weeks after just about 4-5ish months!
The best advice here is to just lie your ass off and start however possible. Lie about old jobs. Experience. References. Transportation. Anything. The worst they can do is turn you back to your old life. And even a shitty job is experience for the resume. When you have the inertia of having a job it’s harder to convince yourself, especially as a timid and conflict averse person, to not go.
Then it’s all natural from there, it’s easier than I ever thought it would be. I’m in IT now and can grow so much from here. It’s changed my life. Soon i can leave my abusive family because of this. And i’m not even married to this job, because now i have a little experience and KNOW i can do things, that I’m smart and able. It’s liberating feeling the easy-come-easy-goes of life this closely.
We’re in a labor shortage- now is the time to lie and get yourself somewhere better, and i believe any of you can do it no matter how badly you think of yourselves. We’re all gonna make it!

No. 988219

I'm so glad you made it anon!! and thanks for the advice, I'm gonna screenshot it for motivation and as a reminder.

No. 988890

File: 1638991189038.jpg (185.27 KB, 1698x1140, download (1).jpg)

Bank anon here. I have worked on the call center for a week and I feel worthless. Most of the calls that I have received I got help from my supervisors, literally almost every call, despite the fact that we have textbook tier notes, but I can't check them out as fast as I can because we shouldn't let the client waste their time because a wagie is checking out their notes.
However, my supervisors told me last tuesday that I am kinda MVP. But on the same day I spilled my spaghetti on two boomers that will write down a customer complaint on me.
Today I have studied my notes but tomorrow at the moment I am on the phone my mind will go blank.
I hope that if I get fired I will be hired somewhere else because I can't descend to neetdom anymore.

No. 988893

I am so over my degree. HR, what was I fucking thinking, I got a bachelor of science too. Nobody cares or respects the work I put in. I don't care, either. I might just kill myself with alcohol. I'm never going to be anything close to what I envisioned. I can't. I can't make cash, I can't interview, or train, or onboard people. I'm a wet noodle neet piece of human woman trash. I'm so old but so weak. I'm a waste. I have a specific intelligence applicable to a certain few jobs and I just can't get in. I am a disappointment. Sorry mom. I tried.

No. 988900

Anon, it's been a week, even stupid shit like that takes longer to learn than a week.

I'm starting a similar job except it'll be in German, ugh, not looking forward to it.

No. 988910

The first weeks are for making mistakes. It's no problem. You get paid the same if you sink your entire being into your job or hang back and don't give a fuck. I've always preferred not being an MVP because they expect much more from you as a default if you do that.

No. 989111

Thank you. Maybe you are not looking forward to it but think that it will looks good on your CV, especially on German, one of the hardest language to learn. Whatever it takes we will get out of neetdom.
I truly didn't expect them to say that, but we will see tomorrow if the boomers filled up the customers complaint. On one hand I want to get out of this job, on the other I'm putting all of my best because I want to stay for the two months in order to get money for my car license.

No. 989119

ive been a neet for 3 years. im 22 and next month im going to college. im excited but very scared.

No. 989132

I know that from some shitposter sounds hollow but I root for you. Just put out your best on your degree.
Meanwhile, if you can, find a part time job to fill your CV.
Congrats nonna, the road to normiedom is ahead on you.

No. 989154

now is the time to get a job, its literally never been easier in my lifetime. this is because student loan payments are paused, so a whole cohort of people with useless degrees is currently not having to work to pay off their debt.

the student loan payments resume Feb 1st, so expect a whole lot of pissing and moaning from redditors then, but also, it will force a lot of people back to work, so the j9b market won't be as insanely good as it is right now. they are hiring legit anybody for retail/foodservice right now and I mean legit anybody.

No. 989440

File: 1639041873539.jpg (61.7 KB, 912x684, 126998421_2980712008822806_273…)

>be me
>got useless degrees
>studied for exams have no actual knowledge or skills
>nearing my thirties with no job experience or a boyfriend
I basically avoided finding a boyfriend by masking it with "i'm busy with uni". Women my age and younger already have not just jobs but careers, long term boyfriends, some of them are married with kids. I don't even know how to fix it. I would't mind getting a job in retail or something but my parents will kill me if after spending so much money on my education I get a job that is socially looked down.
I feel like it's too late to change anything, I don't even know where to start to try and fix my life.

No. 989447

Look for jobs in your field and internships? If not that take any job that's close to your field. Just start somewhere

No. 989457

Why are you acting like getting a bf is so impossible at the ripe old age of what, 29? Your career and education is one thing, but getting a bf is as simple as installing dating apps and maybe lowering your standards. There's nothing wrong with not having a bf up until you actually want one and feel ready, which you clearly didn't if you were making excuses to avoid it previously.

No. 989460

Never tell a girl to lower their standards. You’re right on how it’s easy to get a boyfriend. Most of the time anons complaining do not put in any effort and cry over it.

No. 989477

I don't recommend it, but the reality is the only thing stopping a woman from getting a bf is her own standards. There will always be options for us, they might just be shitty options.

But I was being a bit sarcastic tbh I can't relate to women who act like being single is a death sentence.

No. 989514

You sound male. Shitty options aren't options if you're talking about relationships with moids. Moids always take advantage of a woman lowering her standards (which aren't that high to begin with), they will ruin your existence and waste your time. Seriously, keep your standards, start actively looking for a bf if you want one but remember that it's really not needed.

No. 989585

Shit advice, anon would waste her time and get an std riddled freeloader.

No. 989683

Maybe you can tell your parents you want to have a part-time retail job as a stepping stone into working life but you'll get a better job soon.

No. 990390

File: 1639120614930.gif (3.28 MB, 640x480, 24324124.gif)

Got a remote job just to basically watch youtube videos. Its the easiest shit ever, they even hired me with my spotty job history. I can do it on my own hours as well, too bad its only part-time. Goodbye neet lyfe.

No. 990440

What do you watch the videos for, like what's the job title? Is it like getting the youths opinion? Congrats anyway.

No. 990465

Its called Internet Safety Evaluator, I basically just review youtube videos and see if they break any guidelines. The company is called telus/lionbridge and has other remote jobs in case any anons were curious.

No. 990477

Congrats for leaving neetdom! I would like to ask if you aren't you at risk of seeing cp/gore? My friend worked at a similar position except she checked Facebook and it was so bad for her mental health.
Do you have to remove stuff like amvs with copyrighted music? Or has that changed with the system recognizing tracks

No. 990488

Nah I don't come into contact with things like that, probably the worst I've heard is seeing soft core porn. But you have a option to filter any offensive stuff you don't want to see.
Its just a variety of videos, but so far no things like copyright music and such. Like political videos that were flagged and other random things.

No. 990556

Hey anon, I just got accepted into Lionbridge too but for a different program. However everytime I log on to the system I use it says no tasks so I've done nothing yet. I'm getting worried because I was really looking forward to being able to get a job from home as a NEET but I dunno if it will work out.

No. 990591

Hmmm it could be a couple things. I think around this time of year it can be slow. Some months have more work then others. Also what time you login on also factors in.
I saw people saying they had luck with going in early mornings, so maybe try going in around peak hours.

No. 992281

File: 1639292312345.png (320.97 KB, 749x560, queen laura.png)

It's never too late, nonnies. Life fuel.

No. 992283

don't know why but the fact she's wearing those cat ears is sending me

No. 992292


No. 993115

I don't understand why this is in the NEET thread

No. 993176

Ive had unironic thoughts about going through high school again because I have a baby face

No. 993844

A lot of recovering NEETs worry about being too late to do stuff, like I'm worried about sticking out as an old hag when I start university at 30. Yet this 50 year old passed as a 22 year old for over two years.

No. 995641

Anyone got advice on getting a job with no work history and no ID? I need money to get my ID and I live in a remote area so it’s an expensive logistical nightmare to sort it out.

No. 995676

not technically a neet, since I'm in grad school, but I have a total neet mentality. I'm tired all the time and it's such a struggle to get my grad school work done and I have little idea what I'm going to do when I finish the program next year and my stipend runs out. I have very few friends because I simply do not trust people/assume that everyone hates me or is otherwise repulsed by me, and I tend to destroy any relationship I ever have by ghosting the person/people, and when I try to reach out and apologize after having ghosted them, they don't respond/ignore me. I also have a comparatively small amount of student loan debt that I guess I'll be doing income based repayment on until I'm 80 because there's no way I'll be making over poverty-level wages in my chosen field. None of my degrees are in tech and I'm not even sure which tech area would be best for me to go into as someone who sucks at math (and tech shit is the only way to make a decent amount of money nowadays, it seems). My chosen field basically requires extroversion and charisma and the ability to successfully network to be successful and renowned, and I want to improve my skills in these areas, only I have no idea where to even start. I basically feel like I'm about to have a panic attack whenever I approach a stranger to speak to them or ask them a question, even a service worker at a restaurant or a cafe. I just feel like I'll never find a good career or have friends or anything like that and be doomed to write for pennies online for the rest of my life.

No. 995860

Befriend an older lady who works, moan about the nightmare of getting a job with no ID, then they'll hook you up.

No. 995875

As to also bolster your confidence, when I started college I made good friends with people ten years older than myself (28-30ish). I was surprised when they told me their ages, ha.
I envy people who start later in life, I think college requires maturity a lot of young folks don't have, I sure didn't anyway. Good luck with your studies!

No. 995879

How much is it? Make a paypal and sign up for survey sites. For example Qmee lets you cash out instantly. If you get $3 a day you can earn $90 in a month. It is rage-inducing to get screened out of the surveys but just get through it and use the money to buy the ID then you won't have to do survey hell again.

No. 1012831

I'm a 22 year old mentally ill NEET with €150 to my name. I'm done. I've had it. I've spent my whole life letting myself rot because I don't see a future for myself, so why even try? Well I've decided that I am a person and I've decided that I deserve people things. My mindset has been tainted by narcissistic abuse so I still struggle thinking I'm just an incompetent fool, limping around like a kicked dog, being told I'm stupid if I do the right thing ie the wrong thing. I'm decaying while I'm still alive here. I need to leave because I am going to kill myself if I stay in this environment

No. 1012889


You can do it, do you have anybody you can talk to like your family?

I'm rooting for you, good luck in your journey

t. 28 yo former neet

No. 1013302

Noo, you already identified your self sabotaging behaviours, that they’re from abuse, and you want to change! That’s a great start! It will be as simple as this

>have a daily workout and hygiene routine

>do something that scares you every day
>keep a diary to track progress and introspect
>be kind to yourself and abandon the ‘all or nothing mindset’
>listen to 22 by Taylor Swift

This will get you into the girlboss mindset. Then you have to start networking for careers and finding people. It will also help to find a roommate. Good luck eurononna

No. 1013332

Didn't the lady who started the whole hashtag girlboss thing file for bankruptcy?

No. 1013837

I finally achieved my dream of getting my own apartment. I'm lucky that I've been able to live on disability payments bc of my eating disorder over the last few years since I estranged from my parents. I dropped out of a really good university which I'm still sore about, but I've applied to transfer my credits and finish the degree I was doing at a local uni. It's not a Russell Group but there's no way I'd be able to go back to one. Even if I did, I wouldn't be able to afford to have a place to myself, and I'll be damned if I have to live with other students/housemates again. I'm nervous. I don't want to fuck it up this time.

No. 1013847

My income’s above average for freelancing and yuropoor buxing. I’m in a tradeschool full of retarded adults and retarded kids to get free bux and because I have no highschool diploma. They’re sexually harassing me and/or straight out disrespecting me. But I feel great every time my paycheck for the studybuxing and freelancing flows in. I’m currently trying to go for a high school diploma. I just wish the people at my “school” knew how much I wish them to go fuck themselves and stay the loser that they are lol.

No. 1013857

Yes, if you're referring to NastyGal's founder/exCEO Sophia Amoruso. Her Netflix tv show was so bad and her character was unlikable. IRL Sophia was somewhat of a snowflake cow scammer herself, she probably invented 'gentrified thrifting and reselling', NastyGal's clothing is worse than DollsKill but marketed as a luxury label, but trust me it's all low quality fast fashion shit. Their heyday was a decade ago during the Lita era as they carried a lot of Jeffery Campbell kek

No. 1013909

Oh wow so much for girl power. She doesn’t own nastygal anymore, asshole

No. 1014047

Working from home is killing me. I know is desirable for most people but since I'm currently living alone I can go days without interecting with a human directly. I'm falling into alcoholism and lack of self care.

No. 1014067

is this a serious post? kek

>listen to taylor swift

yeah thats not good advice

No. 1017236

File: 1641428649986.jpg (84.49 KB, 638x479, fabian-tactics-0829.jpg)

After repetitively trying to get over my computer addiction cold turkey, I'm trying a more fabian approach.

Every day I do half an hour around the house, and one hour doing activities and chores outside. Then then next week I move it to an hour and a half, the week after that to two hours. And so on until my internet addiction is at a more manageable level. I was at 12-16 hours a day, I want to get it down to three hours a day at least.

No. 1017239

Wow what is Fabian? Pls tell me

No. 1017243

I'd hate working from home tbh. Maybe you could volunteer somewhere and get out of the house? When I was a NEET I'd go to the library just to feel like I was doing something kek.

No. 1017245

In the sense I'm using it, it means gradualism. It comes from the British Fabians who were socialists that wanted to achieve socialism through incremental reform. Kinda how I now want to incrementally fix my life instead of changing everything all at once. I guess I could've just said gradualism kek.

I was thinking about why I kept on failing every time I got rid of the computer and I realized it's because I have nothing else going for me. If I insert one activity or hobby in place every week for an extra additional hour, then eventually I'll start shutting out my mindless browsing. I hope to get a part time job (4-6 hours a day) further down the track, and then at the end finally transition to full time work.

No. 1017253

What's the point of this thread? Getting a job is the most simple shit in the entire world.(shitposting)

No. 1017343

You're the most sensitive farmhand/janitor ever to help "clean" this site in all the 8 years I've been posting here. Get a job instead of hiding in ur room like a little bitch and getting offended at anons on the internet. What a pussy.

No. 1017890

I was a neet for a few years after vocational school. Even during the school I skipped way too much class because I was afraid of my classmates. I was applying to further education every year but was too stupid to get in until 2021. I still feel like I'm somehow half neet when remote classes are a thing but I'm hoping I get my feet on the ground. First year of school wasn't too bad and I've managed to socialise quite a bit, even if I'm the oldest in my class. In my case having autistic interests has actually helped because a few of my classmates are into similar things.

No. 1017909

Congrats on your progress. Honestly I have found that people in similar classes or fields usually enjoy the same "niche" interests. Like if you were one of the only people interested it wouldn't be a thing. I think a lot of people are just down on themselves for no real reason.

No. 1018026

I sent an email to a person in charge of a program for university dropouts.
Hopefully she replies nicely.

No. 1018543

The only way I managed to reduce my internet addiction was by developing health problems from it such as wrist pain, neck pain, sciatica and eye pain from staring at screens and worsening eye sight. I am now forced to exercise every single day to make sure the body pains don't start again and spend time outside so my eyes can have a break from screens and have a chance to look at something far away in the distance. I have very little willpower (explains why I'm NEET) so I had to hit rock bottom and be forced by my body to stop using the computer so much.

No. 1018870

I only entered NEETdom in 2019 due to severe mental illness. But the doctor warned me that the healthshit is coming if I keep up my terrible habits. So I figure unless I reform I'll wake up one day like you and just be sore af.

No. 1018888

What are your plans to support yourself when your parents die/get sick of you?

No. 1018937

I had avpd and agoraphobia as a teen, seemed destined to just fall into a life of neetdom. My mom then got cancer and wasn't going to survive it. I had visions of what living alone with my aging father would be like. Alot of family suspect he's a lifelong undiagnosed tist and he's hard to live with because his issues are ignored. I moved out at 19. When my mom died my dad sold the house and moved to the middle of nowhere. None of us drive because of an inherited eye condition on his side and he moves to a place with close to no options for transport? I never understood it but I'm just glad I didn't end up stuck hauled out there. I'm forever glad I didn't do my usual 'sit back and do nothing' cope. I still struggle with some stupid shit to this day but when I picture what life could've been like..I'm glad it worked out the way it did. I was on disability for a short time when I first got out but didn't sit on my ass. I worked on my issues, being out of that home actually did me a world of good and I got up and got working after a while.

Then a few years back I nearly fell into couples-neetdom with a guy.. again I learnt not to get too comfy depending on a scrote. He seemed perfect at first, as time went on I thought he was the partner I'd probably spent a very long time with. He just pulled the rug out from under me one day and admitted his feelings for someone at his workplace. It was hard getting on my feet again. Never again.

No. 1018988

How did you find a job? What do you work as? Was it hard?

No. 1019191

I was a NEEt for a short while but now I have a better paying job (was employed previously as well).
However, I still seem to have the mentality of a neet sometimes.
And I can't for the life of me get into relationships, every single guy bores me and I've been on quite a number of dates. They don't really have any personality,hobbies,drive or think their expensive car/money is going to impress me. JFC some of them don't even know english wtf.
I live in a small town and I think it's time to move and try to socialize,I want to get married and have a family but the idea of a relationship is just bizarre to me. I like my "me time" and doing my own thing, the idea of sharing my time/space with someone else scares me so much.
I can pretend to be an extrovert but it gets so tiring.
Also does any other NEET here have dreams of making it big? I mean stuff like buy an apartment, live in a nice city etc because I sure do.
I spent 10 years being depressed and I really don't want that shit anymore.

No. 1020135

If my parents kicked me out I’d just rope, cost of living in my area is out of control and the government doesn’t give a shit about fixing it. Even if I got a full time minimum wage job (only ones who’d hire me) I couldn’t afford to live.

No. 1022903

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Komori anon here, I've been fairly stable on my path to normiedom and breaking free from neetdom. I opened a bank account, got a cellphone number, got a haircut and been networking with people who want to work with me in freelance. I am still scared shitless but not as much as before, today I made an appointment to pierce my ears to look more "ladylike/professional" if you will, my agoraphobia acted up but I somehow managed it under control. Now I'm gonna focus the rest of this month on getting a social media presence and 2 projects I was asked help on. I don't wanna fuck it up and stay a neet forever.

No. 1025045

I am sadly a current neet with various issues but tomorrow I have an informal job interview. It’s a wedding dress boutique. I did a work placement in bridal shop a while back at uni, I have always wanted to work in one but also have been terrified of the thought of doing so due to my social anxiety and lack of retail experience.

But yeah, tomorrow I have an interview! Please wish me positivity and luck nonas.

No. 1025088

Good luck! Don’t put too much pressure on yourself, even if it bombs you still come out on top because you walk away with more interviewing experience. Actually, if you’re nervous about interviewing I’d recommend applying to a bunch of crap jobs you have no intention of accepting. interviewing for places like that gives you a very low-pressure environment for practicing your skills.

No. 1025094

congratulation nonnie! this is great and I'm rooting for you

No. 1025333

Thank you so much! I'll work the hardest I've ever worked!

No. 1028082

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I'm not a NEET technically because I'm on university but these last two years I've felt like one. All my classes were online, I'd never turn my camera on and just be on my phone while the professor was talking. I didn't go out.
I've spent about 10 hours online, everyday, since 2020 started.
I feel pathetic and extremely comfortable at the same time. I wish I was more mad at myself so I could gain some discipline and start doing things. Because I want to do things, I want to do well in uni, learn languages, travel (I need money for that = need to work) but I'm just. So. Comfortable
When I go out to run some errands and see an accomplished girl of my age or meet with my (hardworking, mature and fun) friends, I come back feeling depressed and ready to "finally change for once!" because "this can't keep going like this" but I never make any changes. Everything seems so tiring.
I'm going to start therapy and this is probably the main issue I want to talk about. Because I can't envision this lifestyle for myself in the future and honestly I just feel like a brat. No one likes to work and go to university and everyone is tired from the world, I'm not special or in a different situation than them, but they push through and try to have a good time. I admire them.
Also university is starting with normal classes in a few months, so change is unavoidable. Maybe that is what I'm needing

No. 1028171

covid isolationists aren't neets, take it to the vent thread.

No. 1028216

At least you are aware of your NEET tendencies. It only gets harder once you graduate nonnie. Since you're studying, will you need to get an internship or something? Perhaps you can branch out that way. Honestly online learning killed college education, so try to break out of just being inside so much.

No. 1029000

I'll try to break out of being inside so much, just like you say. And internships are required but in a few years, this year I'll probably try to start a language aside from university and apply to be a professor's assistant the next semester. And my idea is to start working next summer, when I have more time

No. 1029282

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I got fired from my part time retail job… The manager started all with "I don't think this is a good fit for you, you should work with ppl your age, boss says we can't give you as many hours because older employees got better from their illnesses". I kind of blanked out and she eventually dropped the nicey act to just flat say "your last shift is tomorrow". I ok'd and went back to work. I hate all managers, they're slick cunts who act like angels and as soon as you're not their dog they show their true shit selves. My parents are going to be extremely mad I'm thinking of not telling them and pretending to go to work atleast until I can get another job. But I'm so fucking tired of this I don't have the will to find another one. And I don't have the will to study either. I don't know what to do and going outside at night in the -20 C weather is getting more and more appealing. I feels like I don't have a soul anymore it's been eaten up by everyone else, and I'm just hollow.

No. 1029287

Sorry anon, that sucks. Maybe this is an opportunity to take some time to think where you wanna head with your future now, to figure out what could make you happier? Especially if you don't need the money (since you didn't mention financial consequences) I'd take the time to think about the next step.

No. 1029609

I think I applied for something similar but they sent me a 170 page document of guidelines and told me I have a week study it to pass the exam. I'm wondering if I should just cancel the exam because the guidelines are stressing me out and the work seems too subjective for me, I've done similar rating tasks on UHRS and kept getting banned.

No. 1031540

Yeah going through the guidelines is stressing because you have that many pages at the start. But honestly you can use the guide book during the quiz and just use ctrl+f. Or just cheat and google the questions which can have the answers pop up as well.
For the second part of the exam just be more critical and use your gut.
They are likely if you fail ask you again if you would like to retake the test.
I've done other UHRS work before and this is probably the easiest.

No. 1031840

I have been a long time neet and I fucking hate working. I just started with a "real" job in customer service and I want to neck myself. But even before that I worked in a cushy office job which I also hated and which is the primary reason it took me so long to get back to work, we're talking years here. So yeah, I have now some extra money to burn but for what purpose when all of my life energy is sucked by the corpo. Pls someone tell me it might get better.

No. 1032524

Have been a NEET for close to a year now and feel increasingly pressured to get a “real” job. I probably don’t have it as bad as many of you all here and I’m sorry if I’m taking up space. I don’g know where else to share. Anyway I don’t have any job experience compared to so many people my age and it makes me want to rope sometimes. I’m lucky to have family and friends to support me with housing and other luxuries. Still I think it’s time I actually do more in getting my own shit together before it’s too late. There are still some aspirations I want to fulfill but I need to have my own money for them. I wish we didn’t live in some capitalist hell where we need money to live but I’m not seeing a revolution happening any time soon. I’m also getting sick of just staying inside all the time and miss seeing people like when I was in school (pre-pandemic). Wish me luck on my goal to become a wagie. I could also use some suggestions of jobs to look for as someone who’s a shy person who’s never really worked.
Hope it gets better for you.

No. 1032530

I hated my previous career and went back to school, I always said I'd do part time work at school but I managed my finances and was out of work for a couple of years. The anxiety I had with my employment gap made me delay even applying for jobs because it felt hopeless but I made so many iterations of my cv and had different ones for different low entry tiered jobs. If you've no experience try and have hobbies that can develop certain skills for organisation, and some goal orientated tasks. All work places just want to know you can complete steps for tasks and are able to learn. Start applying and if you get interviews, Google the company and learn some facts about the place and what they do. Most businesses will have like a statement on a website that describes them and like announcements for how their business is developing. Also ring places that give you interviews and ask about dress codes for interviews, appropriate footwear. Just show a keen interest. I managed to find a place after months of trying hard and now with hindsight I just wish I did it sooner because having money is nice

No. 1032536

Oh and for actual interviews, Google competency based interview questions, have a few questions to ask about the company, general work day etc. Also Google the star method for interview questions.

No. 1032621

Just adding some advice to the conversation since a lot of us might want to job hunt.

If you have a bit of a gap in your resume and don't want to be questioned for it, learn a skill or take a course. Online works too, and if it comes with a certificate, even better. Harvard and other fancy unis have free courses you can take and add to your CV.

Something like digital marketing, a 2nd or 3rd language, how to use Excel, coding, graphic design, technical drafting, business mathematics, video editing, public speaking. If they ask why you weren't working, you can say you took up some classes while freelancing, these courses will bring a lot of value to your job experience.

Good luck nonas!

No. 1032655

Good tip! Thanks nona

No. 1033051

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I always hid this thread because it was triggering kek but after almost 5 years, I've finally signed up for online school. Not sure if it really counts but I'm gonna count it as escaping the NEET lifestyle. They're just high school classes to upgrade my marks for a pre-pre-med program, but still. I just need to take small steps and work towards Going Normal

No. 1033072

great job anon!! i'm still semi-NEET ig but after 5 years i'm finally working a part-time (under the table but fuck the system)

No. 1033172

I wish I was a NEET who lived in the UK so I could go to the Job Centre. We do have private temp agencies where I am but I'm hesitant to go there because they seem sketchy. The UK system seems better.

No. 1033177

Genuinely curious how you got under the table work? I wish I could do something like that but the only things I know of are prostitution or drug dealing