[ Rules ] [ ot / g / m ] [ pt / snow / w ] [ meta ] [ Matrix ] [ Discord ]

/ot/ - off-topic

(For post deletion)

File: 1562135337784.jpg (53.98 KB, 500x666, darklight.jpg)

No. 429568

Last thread >>421480

No. 429603

I have this fríend who always wants to hang out with me but when I do it she just seems uninterested and bored. I swear we almost don't talk when we spend time together but then she's all over me with her ''I miss you so much I can't wait to see you again" texts.
She always tells me how alone she is and feels but when I try to be there for her she's always texting her boyfriend to pick her up. Last time we met, we didn't see eachother for six months and we only spent three hours together because she had to meet up with her boyfriend (whom she lives with) because he finished work.
Also she's always talking trash about her other "friends" but keeping their friendship, while she can't accept the fact that years ago I had some troubles with my bestfriend and we sort it out, just because she hates her.
I even had to told her that even when I know my bestfriend and I did some hurtful thing to eachother, I still love her like a sister. She told me that she was scared I felt like some 17 years old again, afraid and insecure and that made me feel like shit because wtf? I'm so much older and mature than I was before, when she told me this I felt like she was trying to control or project how I should act based on her opinions instead of what I want to do with my life and who I want to spend life with.
Right now I know she's pissed because I don't want to meet up with her. Sincerely, I feel she's someone who can't give anything positive to my life right now, with her I always feel judged because she expects me to be the kind of girl she thinks I am, but she doesn't even know me.

No. 429607

My stupid fucking dog is driving me up the god damn wall. I barely got any sleep last night because I had a bad stomach ache and kept getting woken up to go shit. I woke up this morning and she was barking around the time my alarm went off, fine, this usually happens. I give her her medicine and her breakfast, opt to skip breakfast myself so I can sleep in for an extra hour because I’m sleepy as fuck.

I live with my parents and my dog prefers to sleep in their room, it’s fine, they like her and raised her for the majority of her life (we got her when I was super young). I have to get up and take her out of the room when she starts barking because my parents dont get that you can’t just THROW PILLOWS at a dog to get it to shut up, especially now that she’s got a bad back and walking issues, so I swoop in and take her out and close the door. She’s also on orders from the vet for NO WALKS (shes housetrainer) because of her back, fine whatever, she doesnt really have any interest in going outside anymore anyway.

She made me get up from trying to go back to sleep SIX FUCKING TIMES to open the door to my parents room for her, only to immediately walk back out. I couldn’t just open the door and walk away, I did it the first time and she started barking at my dad and woke him up- bad sign, so I took her out and closed the door. She just kept fucking barking. I open the front door so she can walk around in the hallway, maybe she really wants to get out of the apartment, NOPE. She took like two steps outside and her tail fell down and she walked back in.

Holy shit I love my dog and we just went through a big scare where we thought she was dying, but she drives me up the fucking wall every god damn morning.

No. 429611

Guide for newfags on how to fit in on Lolcow:

1.Don’t actually sage any thread, but make sure to let everyone know you are saging the thread because you hate the topic, and if anyone points out that's not the correct use of sage, start an argument while insisting you are using sage correctly.

2.Spam image macros, memes and copypasta in every thread. Come up with new forced memes to spam if possible.

3.Bring up the same topics with the same complaints, and no text or discussion value at the same time everyday.

4.Make sure to randomly accuse people of samefagging whenever possible

5.Use a tripcode, the more obnoxious the better

6.Repeatedly claim to be an oldfag and that Lolcow was "better in the old days"

7.Constantly express your hatred for the cows, or even any of the past admins, claiming to have top secret information on who they are and what they do in their personal lives.

8.Go into every thread and tell everyone to go back to the GC or pink pill thread

9.Randomly tell people made up stories about how autistic you are, preferably while hijacking an existing discussion

10.Post pictures of random incels, pretend to be attracted the person in the picture and ask why he doesn't have a girlfriend

11.Make blog posts in the /meta/ complaints thread everyday, telling people who disagreed with you, who you disagreed with, and asking why you received a 2-hour ban

12.Make posts crying about how all anons are femcels and radfems

13.Start arguments over whether something is considered "milk" or not.

No. 429613

I forgot
14. Racebait as much as possible. Complain about East Asians, Southeast Asians, whites, blacks. Anything goes. Particularly, claim that any one race of women is ugly or fat or jealous or ages poorly or panders to pedophiles or wants to be another race. This will start a chain reaction, every time.

No. 429623

You're not as funny as you think you are. Try harder next time.

No. 429625

Idk if anon was trying to be funny. She's right. All of a sudden all these summerfags are floating around claiming everyone is a femcel and that the "moralfagging" is a product of summerfriends, when it's literally not and it's just part of the board culture here now and has been for well over a year now. They also won't stop shitting in /meta/ every five fucking seconds.

No. 429626

I had to move temporarily to my parents' house since Friday and I'm already losing my shit.
If I wanted to cover everything wrong with them from the beginning, I'd write a long-ass post in shitty parents thread, but long story short, I moved out as soon as I graduated high school. When I had to briefly move back three years later, I ended up in mental hospital. Since then I avoid spending more than 3 days in a row with them.

They're helping me with furnishing my apartment now and I actually genuinely appreciate this. However, I'm constantly bullied into doing whatever they want and I keep getting ignored, talked over, gaslighted and treated like a dumb teenager. Just today my stepmother called me while I was at work to berate me for something I was supposed to do and literally didn't let me have a word in my defense, then hung up when I tried to say something. My colleague came to my room while I was talking with her, and was visibly disturbed by this, especially since my stepmother was very audible despite loudspeaker being off.

The sad thing is, plenty of people, both strangers and acquainted, notice this shit, but nobody evered dares to point it out to them. I'm a nervous wreck whenever I need to confront my parents over anything, so I avoid any conflict or even discussion altogether.

No. 429628

What >>429625 said, basically. Which one applied to you?

No. 429637

Well, well, well. Looks like the psycho I dated for a couple of months who wound up abusing me on New Year's and then tried to gaslight me about it being my own fault before blocking me has tried to contact me again.

>Anon I don't know why I'm bothering you but hey. Hope you're doing well in spite of my bullshit. Miss you. Hope you don't hold a grudge because I'd like to have a moment with you again. Maybe the first bar we went to sometime to talk about things.


>leave on read


>If you're not busy on the 4th you could come with me to my work party.

Lmao. This asshole is contacting me because he needs a date for his work party. This is the same cunt who told me he "could have anybody" when I challenged him on his behavior towards me.
Still owes me money too. I still wouldn't go to his work party even if he paid me back triple what he owed with interest. Legit scum. This is how you know someone's a narcissist. The absolute gall!

No. 429638

And notice no apology either. Pft.

No. 429655

What a jerk. Definitely nothing to be missed there. This might sound alarmist but I really think NPD goes undiagnosed in so many men because it's too common to pathologize without people crying about how it's the work of a manhating feminazi cabal of psychiatric professionals or whatever. I think if the criteria were updated or actually applied to them instead of handwaved away as normal, like, 70% of men would have it.

No. 429666

seriously the summerfaggotry on the site now is the worst it's ever been. it's like the plague.

No. 429668

My boyfriend likes to call people niggers in public but he thinks its okay because he whispers it and nobody could possible ever hear. This idiot is gonna get his ass beat in because he's incapable of NOT saying one single word. I dont care about being edgy or progressive or how relevant or irrelevant the word becomes, if its gonna make some black Chad tear your face off, then how hard is it to just use one of many other words? He could at least say "retard" instead and I wouldn't be concerned. It also just makes him look small and ugly and weak so that he has to resort to what he thinks is the most evil insult.

I hate male ego. Gonna start a $1 jar for every time he says it and then buy myself dinner without this idiot.

No. 429671

Why are you with him and where did you find him? I may be lucky, but I have no male friends who say such things.

No. 429673

wow he sounds like a great choice of partner

No. 429678


Dump this loser and get some standards jfc

No. 429682

He's great at any other given moment in time which makes it even more frustrating because he'll blurt it when I don't expect it at all. I don't know what he's trying to prove (maybe the "its just a word so we should ALL be able to say it" logic) but I don't think he understands how embarassed he'll be when he eventually gets called out. I'm gonna bring it up again and see how it goes.

No. 429683

I'm in the South of France right now and things are a little hard for me to understand.

I was sitting at a cafe with my boyfriend eating some pastries and I turned around and saw a man staring at me in a really bizarre way and while I couldnt really tell his expression since I didnt have my glasses on it seemed something mixed with contempt and maybe anger?

I thought he was just being racist to me because Im not sure why he would look at me that way in front of his wife no less but I just remembered I noticed he was staring at my breasts. So, now I am confused what that was about.

I noticed men and boys here in general really notice my big boobs more than guys do back in America and they make inappropriate gestures and faces to me because of it. Also oddly thinking this was racism made my mood less worse

Yes I know this is cringe and retarded and makes no sense but tbh im really confused

No. 429685

I had a crush on a self proclaimed "nice guy" in high school. I really liked him, but he seemed to have crush and ask out literally any other girl but me. After they all rejected him, he jokingly asked if I'd date him and I basically told him to fuck off. It hurt. A lot. To this day, I'm still wildly fucking attracted to him. He's very sweet on a personal level, actually very politically liberal. He doesn't have very many friends, and chases off most women because he shows very clear signs of Aspergers. He has a tendency to respond to everything literally, with random facts. If you mess up a movie quote, he'll correct you no matter the context, with the most serious face. It annoys the shit out of even his closest friends after a while, but I like being around him and enjoy our conversations. I feel like I can be myself around him. He's very intelligent, has interest in the most stereotypical nerdy careers like code and computers. Unfortunately, it also comes paired with an obsession with vidya and anime. When he's not with friends or at work, he's in his dark room all day playing video games. He's pays for hentai and follows insta cosplay thots. I wish I was attractive to him and that we could have a normal relationship, but it is what it is.

No. 429687

If you're in a big city this isn't too surprising. France has a real issue with street harrassment and men being creeps who feel entitled to women's bodies (especially in public transport). A friend of mine who's from the South told me it's even worse there, and that it's not uncommon for even elderly men hanging out, playing pétanque to catcall and insult young women who walk by. It's really absurd.

No. 429692

Why cant guys be nerds without being retarded vidya, anime, and hentai fags these days? What happened to the good classical nerds?

No. 429697

Are you that anon who asked about things you should visit in Nice in another thread? I don't know how guys are in the USA so I can't really compare but I wouldn't be too surprised if some guys are behaving that way because you're a tourist and it's obvious to them. It's almost always obvious when someone is a tourist from outside of Europe without them even talking or doing anything special most of the time. They may think they can get away with being assholes or perverts because you'll be gone eventually. At least you're not alone and you're with your boyfriend so your bf will prevent a lot of guys from talking to you with bad intentions.

Not really from the south but I don't get why all the disgusting old farts are always playing pétanque together while drinking beer.

No. 429699

>What happened to the good classical nerds?
They didn't get laid either lmao

No. 429702

They're rare and they're not much more interesting. Had a guy into me who played dnd with his friends and made little figures for their sessions and he couldn't start or hold a conversation for shit. Young guy too like 21

No. 429713

I am so worried. I was supposed to spend the evening with my boyfriend today but he didn't give me any news, so I tried calling him in the afternoon to make sure he was still good and to know at what time I could come to his place. I called several times and each time it went straight to voicemail, so I went to his place and buzzed at the door but he wasn't there, and neither was his dog as he always barks a lot when the doorbell rings.

It's 8 pm now and still no news so there are 3 options, from worst to less bad:

* something bad happened to him like a car accident
* his dog is ill (he's old) and he went to the vet and forgot to tell me
* he just forgot about me and is casually chilling at his mom with the dog.

I'm so worried I can't even watch a movie or anything. I don't have his mom's number or any of his friend's…

No. 429721

Yeah, this is true. I've found "classical" nerds in that sense can still be mouthbreathing assholes as well. Honestly unless they're mildly charismatic or you like the same things they will be definitely boring, there's a
reason for the stereotype.
They exist, in smaller numbers. Hate to say it but most male nerds like that are older and sometimes married with kids. My boyfriend is still into some weebshit and has a few games he likes but mostly partakes in those things because of me, otherwise probably is the epitome of the old-timey engineering nerd minus the overinflated ego. And he's in his 20s. So I mean, you can find them, if it's absolutely no anime/vidya it'll be harder since there's so much hobby overlap and usually people at least like a few, but non-braindead hentai-vidya addict male nerds exist. It's just slogging through the mountains of shit to find them.
Sure he's smart, but you're better than this. Stop running after a man who doesn't want you, he's probably got stupid standards from his fap fantasies, tries to run after any girl with a pulse from the sounds of it (other than you.) and doesn't deserve your anguish. Does he have any actually constructive hobbies other than playing vidya in a dark room? Please try to move on.
>After they all rejected him, he jokingly asked if I'd date him and I basically told him to fuck off.
This story here was enough to write him off. If he doesn't apologize and actually make an attempt to make good, why should you waste your time? Try to think with your self-worth.

No. 429738

File: 1562180457498.png (48.81 KB, 312x474, pc 5.PNG)

>is there such a thing as a positive vent?
OMFG I'm so proud right now, my S.O. and I were discussing the kpop industry and he brought up the "female porn" industry, I'm on cloud nine, and I wanted to share this little thing that made me very happy.
PS: boyfriend had problems with porn before, and he is getting better it seems

No. 429741

Can't believe shit like this needs to be celebrated for men lmfao. But thats good if he's getting better anon.

No. 429750

Falling in love was the best and worst thing to ever happen to me. Ever since I started this new relationship, my views about everything from love to politics have changed and I'm worried that I'm losing myself in this relationship. I moved across the country away from my abusive family to live with my boyfriend.
He's awesome and supportive, but I realized that he isn't always receptive to things that he can't understand, and not in an intellectual way, but hobbies, political beliefs, etc. different from his own. I know I'm beginning to agree or play down some of my opinions. I'm a radical feminist and I don't support trans theory, but he doesnt like "TERFS" so I don't mention that his insistence on calling men women is fucking crazy, even though I know for a FACT, he would call me out and probably curse me out if I said something clearly incorrect about something, especially Trump.

No. 429754

Your bf sounds like a pussy and you'd suit much better with a guy who doesn't give a fuck about politics and lets you speak your mind without reeeing like a manchild

No. 429761

I love him, but he's one of those guys that thinks he is open-minded, but is super rigid about things and can be a pussy sometimes. Unfortunately, I depend on him 100% especially leaving my family and going no contact.

No. 429762

Relationship vent incoming and it makes me feel spoiled and ungrateful. My boyfriend never compliments me or my appearance. I figured it's normal and to be expected but then I come on here and everyone talks about how their boyfriend loves sex with them and loves to go down on them and loves their boobs, things like that. Makes me sad and angry that I don't have these things in my relationship. I know I'm ugly but it would be nice if someone actually liked seeing my body or actually liked having sex with me. That's all.

I didn't post this in the relationship advice thread because it's just a rant more than anything. I'm jealous of the other anons who post here.

No. 429772

I feel the same at times because I wouldn't be showered with presents and compliments.
But I want to reassure you that every individual is different than the other, some like to use their words and some don't prefer it, you might ask him to change that occasionally or change yourself into accepted that your man isn't an affectionate lad.

No. 429777

with the trans thing, my bf isn’t accepting of it and I am pretty tolerate (but not like super into trans stuff lmao). our middle ground is simply when we’re around someone who wants different pronouns, he respects that because it’s just the polite/non confrontational thing to do. y’all don’t HAVE to agree on everything, especially politics. But being able to discuss things without getting heated and knowing where/when to meet in the middle is important.

No. 429778

nta but you better start saving what you can for if it doesn't work out and you need to leave. Try to save toward first months rent and security deposit. Don't fucking tell him either.
Just be realistic.

No. 429815

Shame I didnt know that, but I did notice a lot of the guys here are really shameless and Im from a southern part of the US where street harassment and catcalling is common yet somehow this topped it lol. Me being an obvious foreigner or tourist looking person doesnt help

Im more near Toulouse not Nice: But yeah you are completely right. The guys in my boyfriends family are perverted too ugh

This shit is really depressing as hell lmao my mood is horrible

No. 429823

I'm so annoyed at myself right now even though it's silly. I'm a very hairy woman, have been ever since I was a kid; I have dark excessive body hair all over, and it seems like more than the average woman. I've tried various forms of hair removal (shaving, waxing, creams, etc.) to find what works best and it's always a struggle. Shaving can take nearly an hour, especially if I'm not consistently removing the hair on a daily basis.

Until I randomly decided to try a men's electric shaver…and it worked so fucking well! It literally only took me about ten minutes to shave my whole body, a fraction of the time it took me with women's razors. No pain, no cuts, smooth shave. Why the hell wasn't I doing this before? It's like I had this subconscious mentality of "oh I'm a women therefore I should obviously only buy products marketed towards women" (plus I like the cute packaging lol) but now it seems so obvious the shaving products for men would be so much better-especially when my body hair is probably more on par with a man's. Can't believe I wasted so much time and money on crappy pink plastic when the answer was right next to it.

Same thing happened with deodorant. As a teen I only bought female deodorant until I noticed it wasn't strong enough during the summer, tried a men's one and it worked perfectly. But my mom made me feel embarrassed for needing to use a men's product ("You use MEN'S deodorant anon? Why would a girl need men's deodorant, you sweat that much?!"), and made me feel like my body was gross and wasn't very feminine since it need "men strength" products. It's so fucking dumb; if it works, it works, who cares who it's made for?

TL;DR: Gendered products suck.

No. 429824

Anon, I don't think it'll change unless you mention that it bothers you. Tell him that you feel kind of bad that he doesn't compliment you very much or go down on you, etc, because you need to feel appreciated. If he shoots back with some bullshit, say that many/most women need that, or say it's how you communicate/receive affection. >>429772 is also right in saying people express themselves differently.
I'm lucky in that I crave that and get a lot from my boyfriend, I would feel very emotionally neglected if I didn't. Honestly, is it worth staying with someone who doesn't appreciate you? Even if you're "ugly" I don't see why you can't meet a man who likes to have sex with you.

No. 429826

where do you have excessive body hair? doesnt the mens electric razor just cut it but not as close as a regular razor?

No. 429827


I'm anxious

No. 429836

No one will really care. Or, people are usually polite enough at cons to not say something. If someone actually makes a rude comment within your vicinity to you, punch them lol. No one really has the gall irl to make shitty, unnecessary comments knowing full well they might get a well deserved punch to the face. Sometimes I might look at someone's costume and think not the nicest thing, but I keep it to myself, and I feel like most cosplayers I've come across are like that. Unless youre some big name bitch, people probably won't even remember how bad your costume might be in like 5 minutes.

I have this fear all the time, and even after making costumes and attending cons for the better part of the past decade, it always crops up. Once you put on that costume and start chilling around with your friends, it's fine! Have fun anon! Are you going to AX?

No. 429839

Nah, I'm not too experienced in cons yet to go out of state. I'm going to Youmacon in November

No. 429840

I've said this before but I hate that Vaush dude so much. He's FOR SURE one of the less intelligent men on the platform and I literally want force-shave off his ponytail and permanently gag him with it so i never have to see his stupid videos in my recommendations. He's also definitely someone that imagines fucking anthropomorphic animals. He's literally neck and neck with Nick at this point in terms of disgust and how much I wish they'd fall off the face of the earth

No. 429842

The hair on my arms and thighs/legs is super thick and there's quite a bit on my back and chest. The electric razor I used gave me a rather close shave, but there was definitely some areas where I either had to go back over it again or use a razor to fully remove the hair. I don't mind though cause it was still much easier and faster than just using the razor.

No. 429850

My bf literally can’t get a boner unless I start touching myself. Literally the only way he can get turned on is if I start rubbing my clit and acting like I like it. The problem is that I don’t feel much from rubbing my clit? Like, it pretty much does nothing for me. Nothing feels good enough on my clit except vibrators, I don’t like touching my clit during sex because I can’t do anything with my hands that feels good enough to actually do it. If anything it’s distracting. Once he gets hard and starts fucking me he always tells me to rub my clit and it’s just annoying and distracting but he apparently needs me to do it THAT BADLY to cum. I have told him multiple times that it doesn’t do anything significant and he seems to doubt me every time and/or doesn’tIt take me seriously. Or, he believes me and just expects me to do it anyway for him. He won’t compromise with me about doing other foreplay either. I LOVE pleasuring him and that’s what turns me on, seeing him pleasured. Bjs, handjobs, ANYTHING, but he doesn’t like those apparently except occasionally. Fuck, I get way more turned on from HIM touching my clit or fingering me because ita not my own hand, but nope he’d rather me do it most of the time.

In the beginning of our relationship, he could get hard all the time and this was never a problem, I know the decrease in sex is something that happens naturally in relationships(we have been dating for almost a year) but this is really fucking frustrating because he doesn’t even want to try most of the time to have sex with me. I have to initiate all the time and his attitude in general just seems really lazy and indifferent towards sex which really turns me off. It makes me especially mad because I feel my desire for him sexually has not changed since we started dating. We used to have sex every day and now it’s like 1-2 times a week. I know that might not sound that bad to some of you reading this but this is coming from 2 people who have high sex drives. He said before he had a girlfriend he jack off up to 4 times a day, and when he got with me initially we would sometimes fuck up to 2 times a day or atleast 4/7 days of the week.

I’m angry because I feel like he’s just to lazy and complacent to actually try to do anything about it. His job isn’t a demanding job at all so I know that’s not it. He treats it like it’s something he can’t do anything about and just tells me to go masturbate and that will solve the problem but ITS NOT THE SAME THING LOL. I want to have sex with someone I love I don’t even care if I don’t cum because I don’t NEED to to enjoy sex? If I want to cum I can just use a vibrator literally ANY time I want. I like feeling attractive and I workout and lift(glutes only) 5 days a week, I’m very attractive and it know It because of my appearance. I am in perfect shape and I literally have nothing I would change about my body right now. I am very confidant. But I don’t turn him in enough somehow to give him a boner.

This is making me more and more angry and resentful of him each time I get turned down. It makes me want to cheat but I don’t want to do that because I love him and he has been cheated on in the past by his ex. Masturbating doesn’t ent help, it needs to be sex, with two people involved. I want that intimacy so so so so SO FUCKING BAD. I feel like if I had it I wouldn’t be so fucking stressed all the time. Every time I think about how he used to jack off for times a day everyday before he met me, but now apparently doesn’t require sex except once a week has got me really fucking angry and confused. I know he’s not watching porn because I check his history frequently, he doesn’t know i even can see it. I check a lot because my ex had a porn addiction that really fucked up my trust in men when it comes to porn and admitting to watching it. I feel like I’m going insane and that I’m being crazy and selfish but I don’t know. I’ve talked to him many times and he never has anything to say for it except excuses (I’m too tired, work stress, depressed). I hate it.

No. 429853

Not going to comment on the majority of your vent, but how would you know that he's not just looking at porn in incognito mode or something?

No. 429855

What's keeping you with him? He sounds distracted maybe. Pornsick undoubtedly.

No. 429858

how long have y'all been dating? do you know his friends' social media?

No. 429861

you both just sound sexually incompatible, unfortunately it happens. you need a guy who gets pleasure from pleasuring you (they do exist), and your bf needs a girl who has an exhibitionist streak.

No. 429862

He could be, but I trust him. We see each other every day and have similar work schedules. Most of the time he is home I am home(we live together), I know his routines and he never does anything suspicious (like disappearing for a long period of time, taking long in the bathroom) I know all the signs because my ex was very badly addicted. I have accused him of using porn behind my back multiple times out of frustration from being turned down for sex, and every time he gets angry saying to me that I’m not your ex and not to compare him to him. I don’t have a reason to believe he’s lying, and if he is lying he’s hiding it very very very well. The only thing keeping me from not thinking that is the fact that when we are not at work we are usually together, I would know if he was watching porn. The only time he is not with me in spare time is a couple hours in the morning that he gets up before going to work and while im sleeping. I fall asleep before him every night.
I’m with him because he is the first bf I’ve had the most in common with morally, personality wise, interest wise, hobby wise etc. he treats me amazingly and I literally have no other complaints about him. He is supportive and not emotionally manipulative like some of my ex’s.

No. 429864

maybe he just thinks you being hot is implied and that he doesn't need to say it (though it's always good to hear and be reassured of). unless his body language suggests otherwise or he doesn't seem
enthusiastic while having sex, he could just be reserved about saying stuff like that

No. 429865

Almost a year, I have scoured his all his social media before dating him because I wanted to screen him for possible porn addiction, not wanting to repeat my last relationship. He doesn’t follow and porn or nsfw models on any of his accounts. We have talked about it and he said he agreed with me doing that because he thinks guys who do it are cringey. He said he only ever used pornhub for porn. He doesn't use reddit.
Honestly I’m beginning to think this is what it is. I was so thankful to find a man who wasn’t pornsick but I guess the catch is we aren’t compatible sexually..idk

No. 429869

He’s never gone soft during sex, and the only time he couldn’t cum from sex is when we are drunk. Literally once we start having sex it’s great, he remains engaged and based off of body language he is very into me. It’s like the problem is getting him initially turned on. He will take longer to come unless I start putting on a performance for him (aka fingering myself,touching my boobs/nipples), and a lot of times he becomes frustrated by not being able to cum when he wants, so he tells me to do those things mentioned above to make the process more streamlined.

No. 429870

wait so he's missing and you're posting about his low sex drive?

No. 429871

I've spent most of my life depressed. It sucked, but life moved on, and I'm better and looking back now. I feel kinda sad, I had a lot of opportunities to make friends with a ton of different people from across the world. If I was the person I am now, back then, I definitely would have all of these friends and nice memories.

No. 429872

I think this anon is confused and mistakenly thinks you responded to her sex issue rather than to the other anon who is worried about her missing boyfriend.

not everyone ITT is talking about you, anon, check what posts people are replying to before assuming they're talking about your boyfriend's dick problems

No. 429880

maybe you should talk to him about WHY you both have these sexual preferences. maybe it hasn't sunk into him that you giving him pleasure makes YOU feel attractive. some guys are gross and like it when women get all worked up and touch themselves because it makes THEM feel attractive. is it just rubbing your clit that gets him? or can you do other stuff that you enjoy more to basically get the same idea across?

No. 429881

6 months but I've known him for much longer, we just never shared friends with each other.
I've found his roommate's facebook account and tried to find his best friend's account but there is a facebook bug right now so I can't look at the pictures to confirm that it is indeed his best friend as I only know his first name. My bf isn't in good terms with his roommate and they work opposite hours so they barely see each other and I don't think he would know if something had happened.

Anyway I tried calling again a couple hours ago but this time it didn't go straight to voicemail, it ringed briefly and then went to voicemail so it looks like he or whoever was on the other side just hung up.
I also tried looking for his mother's phone number on the web, I found an old number out of order but at least I also found her address, I'll check on her if I still don't get any news.

It's weird because he never acted weird like this before. I don't know if I should be mad or worried and it's killing me.

No. 429884

>6 months, known for longer, never shared friends
um, what? I suck at dating, but this isn't normal is it??

You're a side chick he doesn't gaf about anymore.

No. 429890

Most of the time he sees his friends to play Magic the Gathering and I'm not interested which is why I don't know them, although I did see his best friend a couple of times, and we also went skiing with a colleague of him. We haven't even been having sex for the entire time we've been together because anxiety over my degree killed my libido so I don't think I'm a "side-chick" but I'm willing to accept that it's a possibility although unlikely.

No. 429900

I love how people judge everything about my life instead of being happy for me and my wellness.

No. 429902

Does he talk about his friends? Do you feel like, if you met them, you might reasonably know them?

No. 429908

I absolutely hate the part of people that desires to hate on women. I have no idea how to name it, but I hate it.

No. 429912

I can't say I know all of them but he talks often about his friends and his colleagues.
I'm starting to think his dog died and my bf is shutting in… I guess I'll have to wait and see.

No. 429913

Job rant incoming. I hate the company I work for.

- we are pretty much solely assessed by how me up sell. The daily target is ridiculous. You can be fired for not upselling enough.
- we sell awful products. The quality is absolute shit, but the prices are designer prices. Customers constantly bring back products that have fallen apart in a matter of weeks.
- it's super scammy how are sales work. Customers are led to believe they are getting 50% off ect, but really the items are on sale 95% of the time. The company is doing the bare minimum to keep this tactic legal.
- the products come in filthy like actual mud and leaves, but its normal so no one cares?
- the rules don't apply evenly and its super fucking obvious. I got taken aside and yelled at for making an easy mistake on one page of paperwork (mixing up two boxes) but most people can get away with actual murder. I feel like if I go into specifics I could be identified, but lets just say some of the activities that go on are illegal.
- I get treated like I'm retarded

I've only got a handful of shifts left but this is by far the worst job I've ever had. I hope the company gets exposed for its awful business. It's an international shop.

No. 429917


Yes. Not that women can't be worthy of criticism, but there's something in me that's wearied of it because of how fucking omnipresent it is. We heap so much shame on women in big and little ways. Learning how to care less and take kind of an "you'll never be happy so I'll do what I want" attitude has really helped me, but it still weighs.

No. 429920

sounds like the Cotton On group. never, ever work for them.
sorry your job sucks anon, is there any way you can transfer or something?

No. 429926

sounds like you're an idea of a friend to her, and nothing else

No. 429927

Inb4 europoor anon comes into this thread screaming about Ariel being played by a black girl.

It's only a matter of time.

No. 429929

>squeezing out head of zit because I give no fucks about scars
>somehow hurt my fucking jaw
Either I'm getting too strong or my jaw is weak as fuck smdh

No. 429933

I'm probably at the lowest point I've ever been.
I want to go to this college so badly. I was accepted, but I can't meet the tuition or even scrounge the money for the travel required. I had to defer last year for this reason, and I mistakenly thought it'd all be sorted out this year, but it's not (long story, and completely out of my hands).
I have to ask them to let me defer again, but I don't know what I can even say. My mom says if I admit I don't have the funds, they'll see me as someone who'll be unreliable in paying tuition, and that'll affect how they treat me.
What can I do? Is it a bad idea to ask to defer on the basis of depression, or a traumatic event? I've cried so much over this. I'm just tired and drained. I feel so powerless.

No. 429943

I haven't been sleeping lately, stayed up for like 40 hours, am so horny beyond words. Usually when I get this manic, I release it by making something but I am just horny and wanna do dumb shit, I know I won't do shit but I wanna go out and just find someone to fuck. I hate this. I also know there's gonna be a depressive ep coming up after this but I am miserable even like this, just want some dick.

No. 429945

I’ve joined Twitter this week and I already find Kpop Stan’s to be the fucking worst. You know a group is bad when Trumptards come off as less insufferable (okay that’s a stretch but at least Trumptards stay in their lane. Kpop stans incorporate themselves into virtually everything. The Prince Eric hashtag is a mess rn).

I never had strong feeling towards KPop one way or the other but now I understand why these fuckers have 10+ devoted to their bulshit.

No. 429947

who. we already discussed that a year ago tho and no one was on board for that shit

No. 429955

Ariel’s the most overrated and possibly the worst Disney Princess so she would terribly autistic to sperg about it. Maybe the live action remake will make her less insufferable but I’m not counting on it’s

No. 429956

When someone says they wanna hangout but they rly dont and make up some weird excuse and don't reply

No. 429965

aw I hope that's not the case for many reasons. maybe shoot him a text and just say something like "it's completely okay if you don't want to talk, but I'm worried about you and just need to know you're safe. If you tell me you're safe I'll leave you alone for however long you need."

I don't think it's fair of him to ghost you like this without a single word, even if it is because his dog died. You're allowed to be worried, I would be freaking out in this situation, especially if he missed plans with you and gave no notice. I hope everything is okay and if you care to/remember later I would love an update, on him and on the dog lol. Good luck anon

No. 429966

Is Lil Nas X actually good? Why is he being shilled by Twitter every couple days?

No. 429967

>"I'm not a child anymore!"
>is 16

lol you just reminded me how I love everything about the Broadway show except the main character. It's like catcher in the rye. it could be good if the main character wasn't such a whiney baby. If it were told from Ursula's PoV I would be HERE for it. Waiting for that remake.

No. 429969

He game out as gay a couple of days ago. He seems nice enough but I don’t care for his music tbh.

No. 429974

Because hes gay and corny as hell.

No. 429982

his music is alright, not amazing but not offensively bad

No. 429987

I have to play in a outdoor concert tomorrow but it’s going to be 90F and thinking about being in that heat is making my anxiety skyrocket.

No. 429988

because some of his tweets are kinda funny and he's a fag

No. 429989

My mother keeps on pushing me to go to college on her terms. I've never told her that I didn't want to go to college, I still do, but as someone who's into art and acting I just don't see the point of it when I can be busy making money and putting myself out there. She keeps talking of God and how the Devil is the reason of all this: my depression and unwillingness to attend college.

And now I cant stop crying bc what if I finally come to terms with being a lesbian, and am finally comfortable in my own skin then decide to come out to my mom and family who are just like her. Will they all say the same things? Will they curse me and coax me into things I don't want to do.

I'm sorry if this sounds stupid and redundant I just don't know whst to do and have been put into a really bad place after arguing with my mom.

No. 429991

Good luck, anon. That sounds tough. I hope you have a good time and get some sleep tonight.

No. 429995

You need to move out ASAP and possibly cut ties with your mom. Anyone who shouts about God and Satan is crazy.

No. 429998

Stick to your guns, you're doing the right thing as long as you're employed or soon will be (maybe it wont be as an actor or artist though). Degrees are expensive on their own, not to mention the lost income from not working all those years.

Christians are fucking nutters, dont let their nonsense dictate your life choices.

No. 430004

I’ve come to the realization that one of my guardians was (and still is) pretty emotionally abusive. While I’m glad I eventually figured this out, I feel so alone. I always thought my mom genuinely cared about me but I don’t think she’ll be understanding when I tell her my emotional abuser was her own sister. Plus this person does a lot for me without asking much in return. Maybe there’s an ulterior motive but I’ve come to realize that in the end, it’s not worth it. Depending on this person is causing me my sanity and self worth. I just want to be happy and functional. And I can’t do that when this person wants me to totally depend on them.

No. 430046

I really liked the articles and happenings forum on kiwifarms, because it's usually the more "interesting" and weird kind of news, but lately it's become unbearable.
Has anybody also noticed that their userbase is turning more and more misogynistic?
There can be news about little girls getting raped to death and some still joke about it, but whenever a woman commits a (less severe) crime, they screech for death penality and the threads don't die down for a long time.
Lately a lesbian raped her roommate and they made it into a huge thing. Men rape 1000s of children and women everyday, so why does a women doing that warrant her own thread? They also fell for those photoshopped screenshots of women supposedly being okay and flirting with a handsome pedos, they kept sperging about it for ages.
And today there was an article about a male teacher ejaculating into flutes and having his preteen female students play them, and immediately they start with "but if it was a female teacher doing that to her male students…" "If she was young/hot she wouldn't get punished…". The worst thing is that many of those posters are female too.

No. 430054

It's funny how all my exes acted like I was the most ugly/fat person then they end up with someone far worse looking. My ex called me fat/thick at 115 lbs at 5'6 and now he's married to someone who is 200 lbs and that's fine. Another one of my exes left me because I only have sex with him once a day and now he's with someone who refuses to have sex with him EVER…this same ex said he doesn't want to be with me because he needs a woman who is more active and that he can go on hikes and shit with(he was in shape when I was with him)but now he's literally 300lbs and plays video games all day. This the issue with dating virgins, once they get you they get it in their head that when they leave, they can get women 10x better and their relationship expectations aren't realistic yet.

No. 430058

This shit always happens, I am beyond sick of that shit

No. 430059

As happy as I am for you to see your stupid ex's downgrading, you shouldn't focus so much on it. The fixation is unhealthy.
Like for example, how do you know your ex has less sex? If the answer is 'we still talk' then that could be the reason these guys don't take you seriously.
You sound like you are probably too nice and give them more than they deserve. This includes talking to them or being friends with them after breaking up.

There's no need to have anything to do with them after the relationship unless you have children.
Don't look them up on social media, don't message them, don't worry about who they are currently dating.
Anyway, all the best anon, I'm sure you'll find someone who doesn't act like a douche.

No. 430063

I don't know what you want to major in but, can't you go to a less expensive college nearby? Or maybe a community college then transfer. Also, have you applied for financial aid? Even if you think you don't qualify for any, you should. You would be surprised. Once you get to a certain age too your parent's income doesn't matter. I personally think it's insane to go to an out of state college and pay out of pocket.

You really don't have that many options as far as finances.
1- You pay them out of pocket
2- you receive financial aid
3- loans
4- a combo of some/all
You will have to get on this if you actually want to go that school.

You can defer again. I doubt they would rescind your offer over any of this. You really should call someone at the school like the financial aid office. Good luck.

No. 430071

anon theyve been like alt right womenhaters for years now. where you been?

No. 430072

she's absolutely the worst disney princess. the little mermaid was a crap film too. i wish they would stop trying to rehash tlm at all. megara, pocahontas and tiana are the most underrated princesses and this is a fact

No. 430073

I used to think dating virgins would help with that entitled attitude that men have about who they date, but now I'm actually dating one and am in a similar situation to you. He was so lonely that I thought he'd be more grateful to have someone who finally loves him but it feels like all he does is compare me to other women like he thinks they'll actually give him the time of day. They are more deluded than normal men.

I hope you can move on from him and enjoy the fact that the man who used to call you fat is now fat himself. There's some justice in that.

No. 430076

Leave him! I will bet you dollars to doughnuts he resents you for making him unavailable/preventing him from being single now that his self-esteem has gotten a nice little boost from you being gracious and kind, and he more than likely thinks he can "explore"/"do better". This is how almost all male virgins are. They shouldn't be allowed to live.

No. 430078

I'm scared to improve and express myself.
I do sexy art for living - just got girls in general. While I love my OCs - I hate what I do at the same time. I would love to just stop drawing them and actually improve and do classic cartoony shit - but this is my income now.

I support myself and my family through this. I would be fuckin dumb and even more autistic than I already am to stop doing this over feelings I've buried before and can again.

My art is also very stiff. I mean same poses over and over because I couldn't afford art school and if I try and follow tutorials I don't take them in right (again autism lol)

Nothing really hurts more than people telling me they think I'm a man because of my art. It's like I promise I'm not, I'm a lesbian who loves women. But also yeah I can diversify my body types and do but last time I drew a fat chick that looked like me I got accused of trying to gain sjw points

No. 430081

this is a problem with any man that has low confidence. They agree to get into a relationship not out of genuine desire but because they are desperate and don't think they will get another chance anytime soon. Their perception is that they are well matched. Once they've got the ego boost though, watch out. They'll start changing.

No. 430082

Wow, that's pretty incredible that you were able to teach yourself and then make an income off of it. Even if you're not where you exactly want to be in terms of art, I think that's really cool and impressive.

No. 430084

Not that Anon but personally at first I'd only check a few lolcows' threads so I didn't realize the generalized mysoginy and rampant hatred until I ventured in news discussions etc. These assholes think they're better than incels when they have the exact same mind, it's crazy.

No. 430085

I'm happy, anon. I don't know if it's my 50th try at ADs or because I finally have a semblance of a normie life with some friends and almost a degree, a new stable job, a bf that's not that bad.
Thank you for listening to all my insane and sad ranting, anon. I love you and I wouldn't be here without you.

No. 430088

i’ve been binging uncontrollably for the past month or so, now. i go through periods of binge eating/purging and restricting, so my weight is always yo-yoing between the same 20-30 lbs. i’m also tall so the weight gain isn’t as dramatic/noticeable on my frame to an outside observer but my god do I hate myself and my body.

No. 430090

I fucking HATE Ariel and she's by far the absolute worst of all the Disney Princesses. She's the character all the ~quirky~ girls like because she's as spergy, childish and selfish as they are. Even her design is ugly. There's nothing redeemable about her.

No. 430094

Another lesbian artist here and to be honest fuck that ~body diversity~ stuff. If it's not for you then it isn't. I mostly draw pretty anime women with big titties and long legs because I fucking like it and it's my own damn business. If someone told me to ~diversify~ my characters for the sake of woke pandering I wouldn't have any obligation to do so. You don't owe shit to other artists. You can practice poses and anatomy but someone shitting their pants over sexy girls can go to any of the million Tumblr artists for their overweight vitiligo trans black lesbians and leave you the fuck alone.

No. 430107

i know you're a lesbian but you sound like a cool girl and like everyone that cries and whines when i make any critique of bayonetta. i really hate the "but I AM A LESBIAN/BI AND YOU'RE LIMITING MY FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION, IT TURNS ME ON!!". i think it's important to be aware of the art you produce. most of your work will be consumed by males so, idk it's just cheap to be like "WELL it turns me on so i should be able to do whatever i want with ANY criticism!" who cares if you're a lesbian or bi or whatever? your subject matter is still going to attract gross men and please disgusting men and can still be male gazey and tacky.

No. 430114

A lesbian drawing big titted girls is the same as a man drawing big titted girls, you're both gross perverts.

No. 430118

Not that anon but I think there's a difference in how most female artists treat drawing sexy girls and how men do.
Lesbians/bi women usually draw even conventionally attractive women with a personality, a narrative, something that goes beyond shallow male gaze shit. When I draw conventionally attractive women I'm interested in their facial expression, the way they wear clothes, the personality they convey ; that's what I deem to be "sexy". I've never met a man who was aroused by that rather than the typical brainlet big titted anime gf shit.

No. 430119

NTA, I like bayonetta as she is, and I'm not a lesbian, I just think she's cool. I don't care that some autistic fatty is going to tug one off on her character design.

No. 430120

nta I'm a lesbian and I don't mind you drawing that. In fact, having big tits myself it's nice to know other lesbians are into it because when I browse lesbian subreddits it's mostly kristen stewert type of body and it makes me feel a bit down.

sorry for the blog post

No. 430125

her character design is tragic and you have bad taste. her head is pathetically tiny. she has a literal pinhead. she's totally anatomically fucked and the games suffer because they use her unnecessary sexualization as crutch.

i think you're being too generous. the only real difference i see when it comes to lesbians or bisexuals who draw big boobed women all day is that they're more artistically skilled and understand anatomy. they highly internalize the male gazey shit when they do do this stuff and it doesn't deserve a pass just because they get turned on by it. it's one thing if their art wasn't primarily consumed by men, but it will be and it is

No. 430132

It's OK if I have bad taste, I enjoy the things I enjoy and your hair won't fall off because of it. You sound very angry about a video game character. I suggest picking up a hobby.

No. 430134

>just because they get turned on by it.
That makes it worse actually.

No. 430169

this motherbitch aint good and aint nobody care bout his shit unless they 13 n under

No. 430172

Took you this long huh? Guess the racism and homophobia didn't bother you till the misogyny came your way. Typical

No. 430174

Anon you replied to and kindly fuck off, just like >>430118 said all my sexy female characters have a developed personality, different styles and character histories. I fucking hate the narrative that lesbians have to only enjoy wholesome quirky neighborhood girls, butch warriors or mature mommy kink types. I like beautiful, sexy girls with big tits and that's that. It doesn't equal perfect harem stereotype big tiddy goth gf meant for male gaze.

Big tiddies are my favourite kind anon, I just always feel like it's shamed because the sexualization of breasts is so male-oriented. I don't find the Kristen Stewart type attractive at all.

No. 430175

You’re so brave for liking big tits.

No. 430185

so my best friend of 8 years became an evangelical within the last 6 months and only decided to tell me once she came to see me for the first time in about a year and a half. she almost immediately told me she's religious now, and then, knowing i'm a lesbian, spewed some homophobic shit. we calmly debated back and forth until we dropped the conversation, but i couldn't get it off my mind and a couple days after she left i messaged her to tell her how incredibly shitty she made me feel and how i never thought she of all people would judge me. her response began with "i'm so sorry to know you feel that way" and that's all that needs to be said, i think.

i guess i'll just have to widen my circle of friends but it just hurts like a bitch to lose 8 years like that. i feel almost like i'm grieving a romantic relationship with how upset i am.

No. 430190

i couldn't care less about what you personally like. you can like 9 legged aliens for all i care. the point is that you're an artist that adds to a larger body of work that follows trends and sets expectations, even subconsciously, and i assume you want to become more popular, not less? so yeah, i assume hopefully you'd like a decent sized audience to be consume your product so… i mean you have some oz of influence on people. the argument isn't even really with you, it's just with influential female artists that use the "but i'm attracted to this!" as a scapegoat to not think about the impact of their work or women that are attracted to characters or games or art so they defend it as being fine because they're attracted to it

No. 430191


I'm a Kiwi lurker because I like people watching, but it seems like the user base has grown so much that it's attracting these /pol/ mgtow self-obsessed edgelord types that are just insufferable. A lot of threads are now getting the plague tag because people can't just fuck off to their own corners of the internet anymore.
And yes, I know they were never a beacon of righteousness, but I believe that if you want to be a stupid tool on the internet then people should be allowed to discuss you on the internet. Free speech and dark humor, mate. Unfortunately, sites like that will always attract some forms of cantankerous garbage.

Personal rant ; I'm so sick of people making everything about gender and generalizing.
"Oh, this one woman did a horrible thing, bitches be crazy!" Uh, no? She's a horrible person regardless of her vag. "OMG you did this? Of course you did, you CIS man!" Uh, no? He did it because he's a thoughtless twit regardless of his penis.

Gender politics are important, don't get me wrong, but can more people just see others as… you know, people? The same can be said with any form of stereotyping and judgement (racism, ageism, albietism, ect) - I'm just noticing the gender thing more and more IRL.

No. 430193

Oh no, I didn't realize every piece of art you create needs to be a fucking political stand. Why would anyone ever use art for self-expression and creating something you enjoy and see as beautiful and desirable? How vulgar!

Honestly, you can call me a nasty pervert making the world worse all you want, you can't make me care. I don't owe anything to other artists. I'm not even a professional myself and do something completely different for my day to day job so there's no need to pander to whichever crowd feels offended by my work. I just don't give a shit. Save your pearl clutching for someone who is threatened by bleeding heart moralfags on the internet. Or your socially aware hugbox.

Oh, and I absolutely objectify sexy men too. There's just no stopping my degeneracy. In the end all it boils down to is ~le real artisté~ being salty that shallow, sexy artwork sells a lot better than ~true art~. It's not my fault the big crowd is just as horny as I am and loves fast food garbage that is sexy art.

No. 430194

Hi! I'm the Anon of the original post and I appreciate what you're saying!
But I moreso mean I do want to diversify myself SOMETIMES, but when I do I feel judged.
Because I am fat! I just don't like looking at my body and having to face that shit when I draw!! Donuts like double oof for me do I'm prob gonna stay in my sexy art corner lmao.
Aw man thank you!! It means a lot to hear that, I just get really down a lot when I think about progress I missed out on by focusing on sexy stuff!!
Know this convo has died down (and generally sorry this caused a ruckus) but I personally really like Bayo! She's one of those REALLY fuckin cheesy and awful personalities that I grew to love.
When I was younger, still not fully sure if I was a lesbian. I defended the SHIT out of her not getting the problem.
Now that I'm older and more aware - I do see why people wouldn't like her and her design. Her proportions, even if passed off of models, were pretty weird the first game!!
I like hot girls, but I also like non conveniently attractive girls a lot too.
I think there is a convo to be had about lesbians and how sometimes they do contribute to stigmas(?) maybe. But the male gaze, in my opinion, is going to happen no matter what. I think it's a little heavy to push blame on lesbians as if they're on the same level as men if that makes sense??

No. 430195

Honestly, men will find a way to make every thing appeal to them and their fetishes even when they're not being catered to. Just look at how even Animal Crossing characters have disgusting porn made of them, or how Shadman manages to ruin everything under the sun for his retarded audience.

We can't judge whether anon's art actually caters to the male gaze without seeing it, but at least she's drawing something she enjoys. I think encouraging women to produce work according to their own tastes (regardless of whether we ourselves like those tastes) is the best way to have the art scene (and specifically NSFW art) be less saturated with men all drawing the same shit.

No. 430199

it's not a complaint about anon and her art, exactly, really. it's more about women's art that does end up getting really famous

your reaction is disproportionate to my criticism. this is what i mean with every single lesbian or bisexual woman that makes and publishes her 'sexy' art or anyone that complains about sexy art. if it's ever made by a woman, no matter how popular, it's always fine. the conversation can't even be had without lesbians or bisexual women getting overly upset. like, disagree with me all you want, but don't act like i just attacked you with a machete, it's totally ridiculous. i really don't expect anyone to change or anything, i'm just saying, the conversation can't even be had or the influence acknowledged, small as that impact may be, without people blowing up about how much they like it, so it's a huge affront to them and their sexuality

No. 430200

I love you! I wish I could support your art (and enjoy it myself)

fuck off

No. 430203

>getting this defensive over masturbating to your own tiddy art
whew ladies
Suck a titty and calm down, oppai crusader.
I draw lewd art of women too, I just don't spread it around 'cause it's not what the world needs. It's not drawing big tits that I'm mocking, but anons acting like they're heroes for doing so and reeee-ing when it's (rightfully) pointed out that scrotes are gonna crank their chodes to it anyway.

No. 430205

File: 1562261339677.png (6.51 KB, 200x200, 54856-200.png)

I might escape NEETdom soon, I'll maybe even work in a super cute environment selling fancy cosmetics.

First thing I'll do once I get a stable job is get a little (rescue) dog

No. 430211

>as a scapegoat to not think about the impact of their work
The absolute nerve. As if everyone had a strict duty to address this, and needed to scapegoat or excuse anything. Do you have even a single drop of self awareness? Pushing duties on people who don't care and attacking them for not caring (for the actions of OTHERS, no less) is a quick way to make enemies and create animosity. A quick way to make them want to do the opposite of what you say.

Rock on, anon, keep drawing whatever the fuck you like

No. 430213

for the 10th time it isn't even exactly about anon. talk to males about certain grotesquely hypersexualized women that are their exact ideas of the perfect woman and guess what they use to justify it? "the creator is a woman" like in bayonetta's case. it's a very convenient scapegoat for men and for some women

No. 430217

>>429568 I don't understand why I'm not losing weight easily? I've lost like 14 pounds, which sounds like a lot but I'm so fat? I started at neatly 200 pounds. I got that fat because I gained so much weight on medication, which lead to me stopping purging cos whats the point if I'm fat? I'm eating like 1/5 of the calories that I used to, I'm exercising a lot more. My stomach has already shrunk considerably (in terms of how much food I can consume) I'm pretty much used to the reduced calories now. I'm eating between 1000-1800 calories a day. I have a very active job, so that's why I eat 1800 on those days. I've been sticking to my diet for a month now. I'm not going to give up, but it's just annoying. I have a grad dress I need to fit into in 2 weeks fs.

No. 430218

I am scared to truly accept I may never be completely feminine.
I spent do long hearing from my family and friends that I look like a man. From birth til now - people have said I'm very 'mannish'.
I realized through looking around online I had PCOS. Didn't get officially diagnosed until 18 after trying to do an an hero.
I've tried to accept it. I've tried to tell myself I'm non binary and going by they/them would help. But it didn't, it just made me feel worse. Just felt like I confirmed I don't deserve to call myself a woman - because of hairy arms, face, legs, a deep voice, and mannish behavior (not to mention fat).
In the last year or two, I've tried to go back to saying I'm a cis woman. But it's so hard. I feel rejected every single day. I'm barely making it by so I can't really afford any procedures.
I've felt suicidal many days on and off because I know I'll never be a real woman to society.
Honestly love lolcow but I can't lie I can't help but get upset and have to lie down when I come and see a girl who's def prettier than me get called a man lolll

No. 430220

I failed my driving test for the third time today, which basically means I cant work after graduating since I need a car to commute. You only get one life and I've ruined mine

No. 430224

Holy shit, I am NEVER having kids. I'm not even one of those people who don't like kids in general. But, I've been babysitting my roommates 2 year old brother (but he's like the size of a 5 year old just saying) and I'm always exhausted afterwords. On days were I've done it from 7am to 5pm I don't even want to be around them after her mom gets back from work lol. He's adorable but holy shit…I can't wait till I don't have to do this anymore.

No. 430227


I went through something similar a while back, and I just want to say I know giving up on someone that important to you is hard, but I also think you're doing the right thing.

If she can suddenly put you down like that, you aren't really her best friend. Or, maybe she has a very different idea of what friendship is. Either way, you can't have meant as much to her as she did to you, and she doesn't sound like someone who deserves to receive your friendship.

If you were as important to her, as she clearly is to you, then she wouldn't have been able to think these awful things about you. She would have resisted such an idea. So, I don't think she can have respected you, and even if it hurts, of course it's better to know.

Maybe she has a new vocabulary to put you down with, but I think this was always there within her, and I think it always will be there. As you grieve for here (and it is grief, and the fact you feel it for her and not the other way around shows who's in the right), you'll realise more and more that she wasn't as good a friend as you wanted her to be. You'll realise you were doing a lot of work, in your own head, to justify her behaviour towards you. You'll realise you're grieving for the girl you thought you knew.

I might sound edgy, but from the time my former friend told me she wanted me to burn in hell for all eternity for liking girls, until now, I've learnt two things. Firstly, it is not worth the effort to stay friends with someone like that, especially not when there are new friends to be made, who will accept you for who you are. And if you're brave enough to decide that you deserve them (and that's hard to do, I know it sounds cheesy, but it took me years,) you will find them.

Secondly? If someone tells you that they don't respect you, believe them. They mean it. If you wait for them to change, if you make excuses for their behaviour? They will hurt you, again and again, until you decide you've had enough. She's showing you her real self. If you let her, she'll make you feel like human garbage for the rest of your life.

You are not human garbage.

Sorry for multiple posts, this just felt really important for me to say and I wanted to get it right. Guess this was a lot off my chest too.

No. 430231

anon i failed mine twice and my mom had to drive me to fkn college for a while. it was embarrassing. i feel you. what made you fail?

the first testers i had were pretty rude to me and made my cry for making really small mistakes. sometimes you just need to let RNG take its course and give you a nice instructor who will treat you like a human being.

keep trying. i'm really glad i didn't give up, i love driving now.

No. 430232

Just wanted to say sorry for your experiences anon. I'm nowhere near "mannish" but I too have to step back from lolcow at times because the comments get to be too much. Depending on how much a cow is hated, they can never be good enough, and it's hard to keep seeing that on a website that mostly makes fun of female lolcows. I realize every post is behind an individual with their own issues and insecurities, but I don't see how they can't even feel a little bad about their comments sometimes. Sometimes when I post something mean about appearances, I cringe. I'm not cringing over being mean towards the cow in question (clearly most don't care), but being mean towards whoever is reading it, relates with the flaw, and feels attacked by what I posted.
It just feels like collateral damage and I feel shitty for doing it, esp knowing I've felt that way before by posts that I've read.

I guess if I were an unfeeling chan bitch I could play it off like it never bothers me but I do think about it quite often. I try my best to watch what I type.

No. 430233

Most driving instructors are major pricks. And don't get me wrong-I know why they have to be sometimes. Their job is to be passengers in vehicles with new drivers who sometimes do undeniably ignorant shit like swerve into oncoming traffic or floor it into yards.

I just wish they wouldn't be rude over the small shit. I didn't fail my first driver's test but the guy who was my instructor made sure to let me know that I almost had. I even took driver's ed and this asshole acted like I needed to reread the literature on driving because my parallel parking wasn't good-a fail actually-and because I sped up to 17mph in a 15mph zone.

Don't give up, there are just people in this world who when given a little bit of authority tend to abuse it.

No. 430234

honestly it's easier to read mean comments from men that mean comments from women, at least in my opinion. you think people here would be nicer knowing how bad it is already but they have no problem shitting on other women who they deem wrong/ugly lmao

No. 430235

File: 1562271836752.jpg (143.41 KB, 470x470, b_383155638.jpg)

>go to Lidl
>see loose cherries on sale
>hell yeah, haven't had cherries in like 5 years
>sun seems to be shining brighter, birds seem to be louder etc
>go home with the purchase
>get ready for feasting
>they fucking taste like peaches or something, no cherry taste whatsoever
also they're yellow on the inside instead of red? are like western cherries different or something?

No. 430236

I'm sorry, anon. I realize it comes with the territory but the sperging about women's appearances here is ridiculous sometimes. (It's extra ridiculous in the Kpop thread where they shit on Koreans for having high beauty standards and then immediately pick apart female idols looks.)
I would recommend staying away from the "women shilled as attractive" thread if you don't already, it's pure cancer. I would also recommend keeping up with the pink pill and gender critical threads to remind yourself that others don't get to decide who gets to be a woman, or decide your value.
>honestly it's easier to read mean comments from men that mean comments from women
I feel the same.

No. 430237

Here in italy there are quite a lot of cherries that are yellow on the inside. I've eaten them often. It could be a different variety? No idea but it's normal to find them here. They are probably from somwhere else.

No. 430238

File: 1562272262525.png (775.63 KB, 883x660, download (1).png)

BurgerAnnon here and I have never seen a cherry thats 'yellow on the inside'. By some quick googling I found this. Maybe you got a jamacin cherry?

No. 430239

anon as a fruit lover, that sucks big time. it sounds like a different variety. we have those black cherries with the pits here too.

No. 430243

>>430220 I failed literally 5 times anon. It sucks, but you'll get there eventually. You have't ruined your life.

No. 430244

it's lidl so I don't think it's anything THAT fancy, also these almost look like hawthorn apples? so cute! honestly not even bothered with the colour, they just taste NOTHING like cherries! like they are juicy and fresh, the right texture etc but just the taste is absent.

that's probably what it is but I'm very disproportionately stumped as I was so excited for that ~chldhood taste~ lol, have never had cherries like these so I thought it could be a regional difference maybe. had a similar disappointment when i first bought store-variety of blueberries and they tasted nothing like the forest ones, major deja vu rn

No. 430266

I do have addiction problems but like, I'm on vacation, if everyone else is drinking I'm gonna drink too.. the problem is, I'm supposed to be on heavy tranquilizers to sleep, if I wanna sleep after drinking, I have to drink until drunk, I can't mix it with my meds, or it's a real bad time. I feel like I'm going overboard but I've been doing pretty great with drinking lately so.. idk

No. 430274

I feel retarded at how easy it is to trigger a meltdown, I feel like a child having a tantrum, what ever project I start (creative projects like art or crafting) I become so critical of my own stuff I will end up destroying or throwing everything out. Even if I spent days working on it, I don’t know how to stop it, it’s so overwhelming. My brain shuts down, I won’t talk or anything, just stare at a wall for about 30 minutes doing nothing afterwards.
I’m in therapy and on meds but I don’t feel like I’m improving ever

No. 430275

>I cant stop crying bc what if I finally come to terms with being a lesbian, and am finally comfortable in my own skin then decide to come out to my mom and family who are just like her. Will they all say the same things?
I'm sorry but you sound retarded and weaponizing potential lesbianism for makeshift support.

No. 430289

>Guess the racism and homophobia didn't bother you till the misogyny came your way. Typical
I came into this thread for a completely different reason, but this is 1000000% how I feel about you bitches these days. Holy shit.

No. 430301

Because all lgbt care about the rights of poc and all poc care about the rights of lgbt, amirite?
It's only those ebul womenz who solely care about their own problems.

No. 430302

There are tons of different types and variations of cherry. What flavour/appearance were you looking for? Sweet or sour?

No. 430303

Fuck annon I feel that way too in some radfem groups.

No. 430307

nah but there is a subset of women who never have had to care about marginalization until scrotes were mean to them and it shows.

No. 430309

samefag, and it is as simple as "scrotes were mean now I'm radfem" in these cases

No. 430311

Isn't this how anyone who is/was sheltered would become aware of social issues ? They'd either learn about it from others and their experience, or experience something themselves. The latter is more likely to stick with them because of the personal aspect.
I really don't see the issue unless they never evolve past shallow "this affects me personally so it's bad, everything else is fair game" shit, and the original post didn't imply that to me.

No. 430312

Original anon that made that comment, glad to know people understood where I was coming from.

No. 430320

i wanna be a normie now I’m tired

No. 430324

File: 1562286382388.jpg (45.29 KB, 640x425, 0ec30a3e4ce7a0369e811ab0f57132…)

I think I was after sweet cherries? back home they're all called chereshnya (not sure if that's Russian for cherry or just the most popular soviet cultivar of cherries), they're big, very dark and on the sweet side but with that cherry taste still. legit thought it's like bananas or corn where altho different varieties do exist, there's only one mainstream one/not much deviation. serves me right for trusting lidl!

No. 430325

>"this affects me personally so it's bad, everything else is fair game" shit, and the original post didn't imply that to me.
nah it did. kiwifarms and internet spaces on general have been loathfully inhospitable for pretty much everyone who isn't a straight white male for ages, but former cool girls spend 10 min on lolcow and think that's enough for sufficient pinkpilling.

No. 430329

I just bought a bag of cherries at the Russian market near me. I think most of the ones sold in America are Bing cherries.

No. 430330

File: 1562287490926.jpg (78.59 KB, 695x929, 40231d164cab6a903fbdd006c38cab…)

Forgot pic

No. 430344

I have costochondritis and it makes it so uncomfortable when I lie down. There's always pressure on my ribcage and it makes it hard to breathe. I haven't had a good night's sleep in 20 years. Nothing my doctor has given me has helped. I've tried everything, I just want to know what rest feels like, I'm so tired

No. 430345

File: 1562290405221.jpeg (715.65 KB, 1572x1604, 20190704_215230-01.jpeg)

hope yours taste better than mine! I think they were from Spain, they did have that slightly lighter colour like bing does tho, pic related was the insides. maybe it's the same sort of sitch as with tomatoes where they choose the more firm and easy to transport cultivars and loose out on flavour as a trade-off? getting some educational moments out of my disappointment kek

No. 430349

Rainier cherries are yellow on the inside and taste different from the typical cherry. But I’d be surprised if you managed to find them sold loose like that if you don’t live in Washington state, and they’re golden and pink on the outside, which probably would turn you off if you were looking for red cherries.

Minor tangent, but everyone keeps managing to buy out all the Rainier cherries before I can get my hands on them. I’m gonna be pissed if I don’t manage to eat any before they go out of season,

No. 430356

File: 1562293343043.jpeg (44.96 KB, 540x521, 1560918646310.jpeg)

I always hate visiting family because of my mother. One of my aunts was telling the story of how her son almost died because they started developing seizures and one happened while he was showering. Once she was done with her story my mom had to chime in with her usual pseud-science.
>He needs to form his diet around his zodiac sign
>The sezuires are a way of his body trying to fast naturally
>Have you tried out 'my MLM'
>He should become vegan!
Its so annoying because I think I was the one who started her descent into all that hippy health stuff. When I was diagnosed with diabetes as a child she turned to natural cures to cope with it, but she never out grew the cope so she's insufferable.
Also she believes in zodiac signs to the point she's zodiac-ist.
>Someone's annoying?
>Its because they're a (zodiac sign)
Like she blames everyone's failures on their zodiac sign to the point it isn't even funny. She'll assume your entire personality on your zodiac sign. Also before anyone asks her zodiac sign is super spiritual special snowflake of the bunch.

No. 430359

I'd love to meet your mother, I'm a triple leo (sun/moon/rising) and am the most introverted, stage-frightened, don't-look-at-me bitch ever. everyone I know agrees I'm nothing like my zodiac. it's bunk.

I love being a triple leo I just wish I had literally any of the traits

No. 430365

I want to be a better person. I feel so tired and sad all the time. I try to take care of myself but I always fall right back into drinking and isolating myself from everyone. I keep telling myself that all I need to do is keep doing it and it will click but even if my day goes well and I feel productive and accomplished my mind still drifts into these crushing and overwhelming thoughts. I don't even know if they are thoughts really. It's like a flashback but only with my emotions. Meds, weed, diet, and working out only seem to help so much. Meds suck because now I can't even orgasm which was like the one thing that helped me relax without doing something self-destructive. I feel gross and guilty for missing it (which I know is retarded). Sucks I fuction better with the meds than without. I really just want to feel normal again. It's been a long time.

No. 430371

My brain is pissing me tf off tonight. I am so tense over the smallest things, like I just stressed out so bad over a receipt for almost an hour. I ended up just cleaning my car instead because I was just working myself up. I've been going through a tough time rn my Grandpa recently was hospitalized for critical low sodium & hospital increased it too fast and he's back home now but his cognition & physical health have taken a steep decline. My family (sister & mom) have been taking turns staying at our grandparents house (Grandma is disabled and near deaf, she kinda lives in her own little world) because Drs told us he can't be alone at the house anymore.

This is only week two of him being home & he has improved somewhat, we're being positive. Idk if all of this is hitting me now bc I've been taking it well so far. But today I just keep stressing myself out about stupid shit like that receipt or taking a nap or gas is too low in car. It pisses me off, I'm usually a easy going type of person . Although I could be in the week before my period bc I tend to get more emotional, but this is just ridiculous lmao

No. 430378

I fell backwards yesterday and smacked my head against the concrete. It all happened so fast that I couldn’t react. I felt completely fine afterwards. 12 hours later, and I’m pretty sure I gave myself a fucking concussion. My head hasn't stopped pounding and I’m dizzy to where I can’t stand for long periods of time. My first day off in a while and I’m completely bedridden.
The thing is, I tried to tell this all to my boyfriend that I live with and he’s not taking it seriously. It was an uphill battle just to get him to bring me food/water when I need it today. I don’t know if I should go to the hospital and I can’t fucking afford it anyways thanks to the shitty US healthcare system.
Either way, my boyfriend just left with his friends and part of me is fucking angry. I moved all the way across the country with him but to have something as potentially serious as this dismissed and to have him angrily tell me “I’m making a big deal out of it” has fucking driven me to tears. He wasn’t there when I fell, what if it had been worse? I’m getting horrible flashbacks of when I went to go visit an ex of mine and he fucked off to go play card games while I was vomiting constantly while staying at his house. It’s like, the one person I need to rely on and he’s treating me like a burden. After this and how traumatic this day has been, I’m seriously considering calling it quits.

No. 430382

Geez who pissed in your coffee? Just because she didn’t mention it doesn’t mean she’s bothered by it.
KF has been garbage ever since Trump got elected and it became another alt right platform. The Events and Article subfourm is by far the worst thing on that site and that’s saying something. A lot of people there are straight up racist too. At this point it’s Stormfront lite

No. 430383

It makes me sad that I'll never be an edgy lesbian on the run from the law with my gf like tatu

No. 430384

Go to hospital please Anon. You could have serious damage, they should be able to x ray or something to make sure you're okay. Your boyfriend is a dick.

No. 430385

Anon you are a woman. You don't have to be a certain way to be a woman. You sound intelligent and my guess is that you are a compassionate person after suffering so much and that in itself is innately feminine. Please don't be so hard on yourself. PCOS sucks and it's hard to manage (I have it too) but you are still very much a woman and there's nothing wrong with you.

No. 430396

I love every wonderful 12+ month farmer here. Whether we agree or not I value you, you are beautiful. Every other annoying tumblr/twitter/facebook/instagram faggit is ruining the board culture. You are the worst.

No. 430399

all you ot bitches kick my internalized misogyny back into gear. please get a fucking grip.

No. 430400

It's all small petty stuff but did it have to happen all at once?
>get a cold because of fucking A/C everywhere and being hot as shit outside
>tomorrow is my birthday so I had planned a pool party
>won't be able to go into the pool because I sneeze everywhere and will probably feel like shit
>my best friend is taking me for dinner at a fancy place, won't be able to enjoy it because my taste buds don't work
>on top of that I'm working at a new place and my boss has left for his vacation
>until he left there was almost nothing to do
>suddenly I get a huge queue of shit I was never trained for
>my coworkers can't help me because they never performed these tasks and I have to mail the coordinator from another country
>she gets sick and leaves a dumb piece of shit in her place who gets mad if I ask anything

It's not my fault and I'm sure my boss won't blame me but I feel bad for not doing my job properly. Just end me already.

No. 430403

Eastern European living in Spain here. I'm sorry you got Spanish cherries anon, they taste like shit. All sweet but no actual flavor. I miss natural food from my country.

No. 430405

fellow expat in spain (not european though), just wanted to add that they treat all of their produce like shit here and I hate it lol

No. 430412

File: 1562312870106.jpeg (44.88 KB, 348x499, AA8549C7-EB50-481B-ACAB-E18E7C…)

There was a woman I worked under in a company that was basically the head of the HR department. I felt like she had it absolutely in for me because I had previously had inappropriate relations with a coworker before she even joined our company but hung it over my head. Anything deemed inappropriate she would drag me into, saying that I had a history of such behavior, I was a bad influence on newer employees, and should know better as an established employee when I literally did nothing but work in the same section as the alleged perpetrators. No one liked her and she ended up having to leave her post very early. Everyone assumed she was fired for doing a poor job and only having the bosses back even though she was suppose to be there for us. Find out later from someone in her section that she actually got breast cancer and had to take a leave of absence. I feel absolutely no sympathy for her since she made it her goal to get as many people as possible fired or on the chopping block (myself included) just to appease higher ups when that literally wasn’t in her job description. I hope all her hair fell out and she’s miserable for making us absolutely despondent and walk on eggshells for a year and a half and wrecking my career and many others with false accusations. Fucking gossip monger, go eat a cockroach.

No. 430429

You really do seem to have a history of inappropriate behaviour. You sound horrible.

No. 430430

File: 1562320167350.png (635.05 KB, 718x712, 15a1ab068fa461a2dfe8425ab30c18…)

Officially not a NEET anymore! I just got the job. I'm so fucking happy guys, I was really sick of being the huge loser of my group with no job and no education.

Can't wait to finally adopt a dog, it's been my dream since I was a teen but I was always either leeching off my parents and / or financially unstable.

No. 430437

Congrats! Can you tell us more about the dog that you want?

No. 430442

Imagine being so toxic you wish someone has horrible chemo. No one wants or needs you anon. Fix yourself you're clearly damaged

No. 430457

File: 1562325203830.jpg (Spoiler Image, 192.4 KB, 800x1200, EF98DC1.jpg)

>date girl with vitiligo
>start getting obsessed with it
>She leaves
>Lesbian dating pool is already very small in rural south and it's hard to find lesbians I consider physically attractive

No. 430461

Congratulations, anon! My graduation from NEETdom was a huge and wonderful turning point my life, I hope it'll be the same for you

No. 430462

File: 1562325563863.jpg (152.54 KB, 1038x576, brown.jpg)

Only sort of related to your post, but I wonder about this. In the same way that some people use melanotan to darken their skin, or glutathione to whiten their skin, has anybody tried to induce vitiligo? Is there even any substance that can do that?

No. 430472

I told him everything from the bottom of my heart and it still didn't matter.
I can't live without him.
I can't believe I fucked up the only good thing i've ever had in my life.
The minutes feel like hours and the hours feel like days.
I can't do this.

No. 430478

How did you fuck up?

No. 430494

ah fellow sister, thanks for confirming I'm not insane, was starting to wonder if I had exaggerated that quintessential cherry flavour of my childhood in my head or something kek, sorta like that "grass was greener, skies were bluer" kinda sitch. should've splurged on out of season ones when I was back home earlier but they were scalping like 15€ for 200gr and I had "dignity"

No. 430502

What the fuck your boyfriend is trash. Sorry you already moved in with him, hope you can get away before things get worse. Hopefully you can get it checked out soon, you are right US healthcare system is garbage.

No. 430503

That's more than enough reason to break up with him.

No. 430508

My friend told me he wanted to get me a gift for my birthday and I told him I didn't need one and to save his money. He got really upset and said "I just wanted to get you something thoughtful but now I won't bother, don't worry." I feel like an idiot. I just know money is tight with him and that he could use it for something way more worthwhile but I guess I came off as an insensitive asshole instead. I'm an idiot. Why am I so awkward about receiving gifts?

No. 430515

oof. the fuck? did he even console you? drop his ass regardless

No. 430520

File: 1562336826280.jpg (131.02 KB, 1200x800, 1200px-Emily_Maltese.jpg)

My dream dog is a cute maltese. But I plan to adopt a rescue dog so I'm open to every and any dog, I'll probably end up with a mutt.

No. 430524

you should look into breed specific rescue groups! I got my purebred golden retriever from a rescue.

https://www.americanmalteserescue.org is one for maltese or look up your specific state/region!

No. 430525

If he knew you in the least it's very simple to buy something thoughtful or useful. Most people even enjoy a birthday card with a meaningful message with something like a gift card someplace. He didn't need to ask, and it almost sounds like a copout. Most friends tell friends to not get them anything as a polite gesture.
He sounds like an ass, not you.

No. 430536

His gift to you was guilt. He sounds either autistic or just one of those guys who reads into everything and takes it personally.

No. 430550

>Go to hospital please
Popping in to emphasize this. I can name three people who hit their heads, felt fine afterwards, and then died later that day.
Obviously you have't died, but head injuries are a big deal. Physical trauma to the head especially insidious because your ability to gauge the severity is nullified.
Please please please see a professional. And dump your bf, ofc

No. 430560

Why not open an IG or some other social media profile under a completely different name and just go ham posting and drawing whatever the fuck you want in the name of experimentation and improvement? At best, people will like it/you'll get good critique. At worst, people will recognize it's you or accuse you of piggybacking of your own style. Maybe you'll even find a new audience.

No. 430561

anon thats just russian for cherry… your lidl probably just had them imported from somewhere
and maybe it's just a bad harvest, kinda with how you sometimes get strawberries that are very watery and tasteless
just bad luck

No. 430563

She has the most amazing lip color. I'm jelly.

No. 430564

getting worried about that Anon now

I hope she checks in later to say she went to hospital and is OK.

No. 430571

Can I just get one fucking good news in my life please. Just one good news that's relevant to my fucking shitty life and makes me want to die a bit less. Fucking please.

No. 430572

NTAYRT but congrats on getting a job! I hope you'll find the dog right for you. Malteses are so fucking cute, but if you do get a mutt, at least you can live with the knowledge that they'll hopefully not have as many genetic health issues that purebreds tend have!

My dad wants a maltese so bad. We have a pekingese right now, first dog I've ever had and I didn't even know the breed existed before we got her, but I'm fucking obsessed. Never though I'd be a breed loyal bitch (especially for such a pain in the ass dog), but here I am lol.

No. 430580

File: 1562345930267.gif (635.66 KB, 498x278, 3ec.gif)

I started talking to a cute boy at work, nothing serious just casual "who are you" sort of stuff. why he moved to the area, where he came from, etc. etc. (First interaction was him asking my age and I swore I thought i hear him say "Me too" but it was loud. I spaghettied and asked his star sign then) He's about an inch or two taller than be and Strong and sometimes i get to see him when he's worked up a sweaty glow.
He calls me over one day and we work together for an hour or two. He's even got a cute accent. And Tattoos.
But since I'm not an idiot I go home and put on my Miner's Helmet.
Boy's nine years older than me. Boy has a marriage cert from 2010. Boy has "Married to …" in his facebook. Boy references "two kids" in once facebook post.
Kill me now
I've read too much into his niceties

No. 430581

esl niggas typin like….

No. 430582

I'm so tired of Disneyfags and people that obsess over adaptations. Pls die.

No. 430632

>>429913 me again lmao. I did a shift today with different people and jfc.

- The shop was a fucking mess. There was a pile of like 30 clothes stacked up on the only till, but I get yelled at for having a few silica packets on the floor?
- One person had their phone on loud (we aren't allowed our phones on the shop floor) and ther ringtone went off 3 times whilst they were serving. They then took all of the calls on the shop floor (they weren't work related)
- The shop wasn't closed properly at all. So many jobs weren't done, but I get yelled at if I don't do everything 100% perfectly?
- Several people made the same mistake I made the other day with the receipt log, but none of them were given a formal write up.
- The till was down A LOT, but they faked the paperowrk

I know I'm being picked on, but jfc I didn't realise it was this crazy. I don't understand why I am held to an impossible standard.

Also many customers made comments on the fact that our stuff is never full price, which is misleading because people aren't getting the deal they think they are. We've been told to tell everyone we comply with the law. We aren't even trying to pretend we aren't a scammy buisness at this point.

All of this wouldn't be that bad, but I have a terrible home life. So I have a shit day at work, then come home to more shit.

No. 430646

>job requires paid experience in a certain industry
>I have almost 10 years of paid experience in this industry
>get rejection email hours later: "sorry but we are looking for applicants with experience in X industry"

so you didn't even read my resume or cover letter? cool. I was so tempted to snarkily email back like "with all due respect, I do" but I know it wouldn't do anything expect burn a bridge with this particular company. I wonder if the reason I've had no luck getting work since moving to a new country is that no one fucking reads my (professionally reviewed) resume for some reason.

No. 430649

File: 1562354281398.jpg (78.02 KB, 683x800, pom.jpg)

You're both wrong, pomeranians are the best dogs.

But still, I hope you enjoy your puppers.

No. 430656

I had an internship as a recruiter and basically yes, almost nobody read cover letters and they only look at resumes without reading them all that much, so recruiters almost always miss important info. I was even treated like a drooling retard sometimes for reading cover letters when that was the one thing that made a huge difference between applicants and it often turned out to help me recruit the perfect applicants. Sometimes recruiters are so stupid that they plan interview with people who are not available for the job or fit almost no criteria, while also rejecting applications that fit all the criteria they establish because they barely read important details in cover letters AND resumes all at once. Do you think there's a way you can directly contact the recruiter and ask for details by phone or email, or did you receive an automated email?

No. 430666

While the email itself seemed copy/pasted I think there are actual people who do attend the inbox. Do you think it is worth me emailing them back? If so, what's the most professional way to say "read my fucking resume idiot"?

No. 430667

I decided a long time ago that I wanted to have my pet dog interred in this beautiful pet cemetery just a little bit outside of the city we live in. I knew it was going to cost me a couple grand for the cremation, plot of land, gravemarker, urn, and the one time perpetual maintenance fee to make sure her grave would never be disturbed even after my entire family passes away.

My dad decided that he wanted her buried whole. I didn't argue with him too much about it because my grandmother was cremated and he didn't get any say in it, so I feel like this is the least I could do, but it's getting ridiculous. He wanted the nicest, most expensive casket and gravemarker, and to have her picture engraved on the gravemarker. It's going to be more than double how much it was already going to cost. He said he'll cover the costs of everything else and I just have to cover the maintenance fee (still a very, very hefty amount of money), but I think it's fucking ridiculous to do so much for a pet that's not even going to be alive anymore. He constantly spends money like it's water, and my mom has to sort out how to pay for all of his stupid shit, and he's going to do it again with my dog's funeral. What's the point in driving yourself further in debt for a pet that's no longer here?

I picked out this cemetery because I wanted a place where I could come back and visit no matter where I would move to in the future, and so I didn't have to worry about moving with her ashes. I know that that's already ridiculous, having my dog interred in a cemetery, but it's what I wanted. Blowing so much extra fucking money on a stupid fancy casket and gravemarker is a whole other level. Holy shit she's a dog. She doesn't give a fuck. I'm pissed that he's okay with spending that money AFTER she's gone, when he always complained about how much her vet bills cost and was always reluctant to take her. We just had a death scare the other week, but she's doing much better now, and it'll probably cost me a couple hundred to redo all the testing and possibly more medication, but that's fine with me because the money I spend with her now to keep her healthy and with me is nothing to me. After she's gone though? What's the point other than just some basic niceties on her grave spot?

No. 430671

File: 1562357068212.png (650.68 KB, 491x535, oak.PNG)

AYRT I love poms too! But damn, put me in front of a peke and I won't be able to help but want to take it home.

Have you ever seen Oaksoosoo? Fuckin' love this pom so much https://www.instagram.com/oaksoosoo/?hl=en

No. 430677

Honestly I'm not too sure because English isn't my first language and I don't want to give you bad advice that won't apply to you, and I'm never really sure how to write formal letters and emails in English myself. Obviously you have to appear to be as polite as possible, maybe write in an "innocent" way like maybe they never really received your cover letter or the file was corrupted when they received it so you just want to send a nice, gentle reminder with your cover letter attached again. And obviously you should mention you have the correct number of years of experience in the email itself so they won't be able to easily pretend they didn't receive anything at all, just don't look like you're passive-agressive or frustrated. tbh they might have sent that email because the company already made a choice and they just sent you a generic reply but it's still worth a try imo, you don't have anything to lose by doing so. Good luck.

No. 430691

Thank you for your insight anon, I'll give it a try. The job posting is still up so they haven't picked a candidate yet at least.

No. 430704

File: 1562363732804.jpg (132.38 KB, 640x1136, 939hV8R.jpg)

family never liked me that much but they hate me for withdrawing my medical school application after I got accepted

No. 430707

This is me but with law school. For some reason I'm more reviled in my family for getting an MA than my cousins who don't have any education with one literally having a criminal record.
Suppose I don't kiss and manipulate enough ass to appease the narcissists. Oh well.

No. 430711

A cute mutt though!

No. 430718

NTA but if recruiters don't even read the resume/cover letters they ask for (which I totally believe) then how DO they recruit. Do they just pick a handful to read and then make selections based on that? I know recruiters can receive hundreds (if not thousands) of applicants so I get it's a lot of legwork, but…

No. 430720

I've had to move so many times throughout my life and it's very upsetting. This most recent move in with my stepdad has got me super depressed.

I saved up somewhat decent furniture and put it into storage because I thought I was going to have a future and a house with my ex of four years. It was right as I was fresh out of college so I tried to procure nice things and took care or fixed up hand me downs. My ex never got his shit together so I broke up with him. When I moved out, people damaged a lot of my stuff. My stepdad tore apart my dining room table claiming it would be "easier" to stow. I had a bad feeling.

Now I'm trying to move into stepdad's apartment and I'm bringing most of the furnishings. I can see just how much in bad condition all of my stuff has been left in. I refurbished a chifforobe but someone who moved it busted the door. A lot of my dishwares are cracked. Despite having a climate controlled storage unit, a lot of my fabric stuff has a smell or stain. Many furnitures have scuffs, scratches, and dents from being haphazardly tossed. That dining room table? The first thing my stepdad bitched about was being unable to put it back together and now he wants to pitch it and asked how attached I was to it. The slap in the face was that it was his fucking idea to do something so stupid and now another furniture of mine is destroyed. A piece that while I had it with me I did a good job to make sure it was in good condition.

It's horrible. I feel so awful and anxious. It makes me want to throw everything the fuck away because nothing feels special. I don't care if it sounds dramatic, but I truly feel violated.

No. 430723

NTA but usually they look at just the basic name of previous employers and figure out the industry it's for, then they recuit you based on the industry you have experience in. same with your degree, they place you based on a degree first and foremost.

No. 430724

A teacher at my college just announced he's quitting his job to do Youtube full time and I can't help but think it's the dumbest thing ever. I'm not surprised he made the decision though, because the minute his channel got some attention he started neglecting his job; he literally canceled our class final exam because he said he didn't have time to both give the exam and make a video for his channel in the same week. It's just so stupid. The man has a wife and kids to support–why leave a reliable job to do something that isn't a stable income? He's only been "famous" for a couple of months; his videos get a good amount of views and he admittedly makes decent money from Youtube but there's no guarantee it'll last very long. I just can't help but roll my eyes at a grown man who thinks relying on ad revenue/sponsorship is a good long term plan. It just seems…sad.

No. 430727

Reminds me of someone I know, they quit their stable job with a comfortable salary in hopes of becoming a film dierctor at the age of 32 with no past experince or projects done before except for some video edits for their seflies on imovie… now their partner is spending on them and they're literally begging for everything and won't get a minimum wage job because they're better than this.
Share the link to his channel though.

No. 430729

What a fucking idiot.
But you know what? I hope the new job opening for professor goes to a better hopeful who will be grateful for the opportunity.

No. 430731

People who think they're too good for a normal job are the worst. I think the number of cows/flakes on here would more than halve if they were all willing to get a regular job instead of continually trying to make money off scamming or their bodies or their online presence.

No. 430738

>in hopes of becoming a film director at the age of 32
Dear god, why do some people want to live mediocre lives.

And sure anon: it's https://www.youtube.com/user/aragusea . It's a cooking channel; one of his videos went viral and he basically got a bunch of subscribers overnight. Like I said his stuff gets a ton of views and he seems to have a decent fanbase. I just wouldn't quit my job over it.

(Not sure if this is against the rules or not but just in case: this all public information, even him quitting his job since he announced it in an article about himself that's available to the public online.)

I hope so too anon, honestly after seeing how non-committed to the job he was it seems like future students are better off with someone else.

No. 430763

File: 1562376785881.png (75.15 KB, 263x235, unknown-9.png)

My boyfriend lied to his parents to close our LDR (long distance relationship) gap and now they're pissed off at me.

We met online almost 2 years ago, and we've been planning to meet up and eventually live together after 14 months. Everything went smoothly- I transitioned easily into working in this new state and he had two jobs and his own apartment already. He's 20, I'm 22.

I recently made a facebook to talk to my family after being homesick and he mistakenly posted our relationship status publically and his mom had seen. He didn't realize she would see, so when she did and texted her, it turned out he lied. A lot.

About where I'm from, how we met, what I've been through. Everything. She confronted him about this and he expected me to completely play along as if I knew anything about it at all. I'm pissed and sick to my stomach because I've been completely open and honest about our relationship to my family and friends. Not only has his lying made me seem untrustworthy, but now neither of his parents want anything to do with me because of it.

It hurt my feelings a ton, but he's not understanding why. He ruined what could have been a good thing but now I just want to go home.

No. 430769

File: 1562378677025.gif (1.84 MB, 500x500, 1534412606114.gif)

Sorry in advance for the long post
>from shitty third world country, living abroad since I was 19 (am now in mid-20s), consider new country my home, home country is unlivable
>Stayed long enough to technically qualify for citizenship, passed language test etc, but they always give me short term visas and you can't apply without already having a long-term visa (family or stable work)
>need one document to renew visa this month, long wait because it's a court process, need family member to request it in my home country
>this time it will be a long-term one and I'll finally be considered an equal and able to work full time, get healthcare and qualify for citizenship
>my mom completely fucks it up and now I have to wait even longer
>might not get new visa on time before this one expires because mom fucked up everything and has to be babysat for everything technology related
>if visa expires I'll have to wait 4 to 7 more years to qualify because I would be in the country illegally for a short time

But wait, there's more

>Need money to pay for visa fees

>Invoicing issues delayed my salary
>Have less than 10€ on my bank account because bf works at a startup that can't secure funding and hasn't been paid for 4 months, I had to use the last of my money on rent (because his boss promised he'll be paid "maybe next week" for some weeks now) and he promised me we'll be fine and he'll pay me back
>used up all of my savings (for doctors, rent, small fund for a japan trip I've been wanting to visit for 11 years) on bills and rent for the both of us because he supported me in the past
>We both eat only once or twice a day and go to bed hungry so we can sleep it off
>My job is very physical so I'm very slow and tired because I have no time to eat in the morning and I'm always hungry
>Do a poor job and have started getting bad reviews, which can lead to getting fired, plus I'm very slow and clumsy by nature so I know I'll never be really good at what I do but I have no choice but to do it

But wait, there's more

>have no experience in my field because I've been stuck cleaning, cooking, wiping asses etc for years to support myself

>applying for jobs since January and have not once been even called back while all my friends and classmates get decent to good jobs, my CV is all over the place because I have creative hobbies and projects but studied physics, and little experience
>Everyone's saying "why don't you have a good job lined up yet, you were the smartest girl in class" as if I want to clean, cook and wipe asses all my life
>My teeth hurt a lot but I can't afford to get them fixed so I have to take paracetamols on an empty stomach

Someone stop this Kafka ass shit right now.

No. 430771

His family sounds shitty. They obviously believe anything he does. I would never automatically dislike my son's gf.

Save money to get your own place some day if need be.

No. 430826

I have come to the conclusion that I have no real friends. My "friends" haven't talked to me in over 3 months and whenever I have wanted to hang out, they tell me they don't have money (even if it's just walking around a park) or they are too busy. One of them only texts me on my birthday.
My online friends end up ghosting me. I wish I didn't always have to start conversation. It makes me feel like I am not interesting enough or that they just don't care. They never start the conversation, it's always me. I don't know why this always happens. Maybe I am too clingy or annoying? I am starting to think I am just not meant to have any friends.
Isolation feels depressing but at least it's better than the feeling of constant rejection.

No. 430830


god, i feel you so hard anon. it's like, no matter how much you reach out or what kind of attempts you make to either keep friendships or make new ones, it's all fruitless and leaves you at the place you started: alone.

sage for not adding any real contribution or advice, i just came here to vent about the same thing and saw what you posted.

No. 430842

Thanks, but I'm not american. We do have a lot of rescue group here but breed specific rescue groups are unheard of.

Thanks ! That's what I tell myself to, I was very shocked when my uncle adopted a purebred dog and he ended up blind after developing glaucoma in both eyes and almost died due to kidney failure in the first three years of his life.


No. 430844

That shit all absolutely blows anon. I am truly sorry. Simply reading all that, I started clutching my head in anxiety.

I wish I could throw a couple hundred bucks at you

No. 430854

>My "friends" haven't talked to me in over 3 months and whenever I have wanted to hang out, they tell me […] they are too busy. One of them only texts me on my birthday.
I haven't seen some of my "friends" in over a year and none of them texts me on my birthday. How pathetic am I for still contacting them, trying to start conversations or get them to meet up with me? All my life it's always been me who was practically begging the others to hang out (even when we still saw each other multiple times a week). Constantly getting rejected is so depressing, but I don't have anybody but them, I tried to, but failed in making other friends.

No. 430879

NTA and I am from Poland - here a czereśnia is a specific subtype of cherry. Regular cherry is wiśnia. They are not exactly the same. Wonder if it's like this in Russian too?

No. 430889

File: 1562411274090.jpg (69.03 KB, 768x576, D5BDDcTXoAAXHjj.jpg)

My mood has been all over the place.
One moment I'm running around, dancing and laughing. The next I'm just feeling like shit and laying in bed all day wanting to just cry. why is this happening to me. I wish it would stop.

No. 430941

Got into an argument with someone today in which she said "you're not my type" and made a disgusted face and gestured at my body, and I got pissed off about it. I'm waiting for her to spin it into me being anti-LGBT instead of being rightfully mad she shit on my body.

This is the same girl that after me explicitly telling her I wasn't okay with nudity proceeded to say she was going to do it anyway and then showed me her breasts and vagina, who tried to gaslight me even though I have all of our conversations recorded and tried to act like a victim when I started telling people about it.

No. 430944

She sounds predatory, and the "You're not my type" is absolutely a cope. Sounds like she wanted you but couldn't handle the rejection.

No. 430946

She's weird dude. Seen her adjust her tits in her swimsuit when she saw mine, gets angry when people talk to me more in conversations, just tries to one up and prove me wrong on stupid shit. It's infuriating. I was a good friend until I saw the gaslighting and bounced and now she's trying to bring up what happened months ago so I can apologize, but won't accept the apology. I just can't with this needy manipulative bullshit.

No. 430951

Warning: Veeeery long post incoming

I am currently living with my LDR boyfriend's family in a foreign country completely away from my family while struggling to learn the language and adjust to the culture.

Not only that, but there is a LOT of drama in this house between his parents, who actually have a really complicated history together.

Like I dont want to really type it all out here bc its long and bizarre but basically they had two kids together [my boyfriend has another dad] and got divorced then the dad stalked the mom and relentlessly pursued her and forced himself into her life again because he paid for everything and was obsessed with her and she couldnt do much about it because she had troubles due to geting a job despite having an education bc this country is racist so she let him control every aspect of her life and pay for everything because she didnt have anywhere to go as she was also estranged from her family.

So for the past 25 years or so the mom has been stuck in this relationship with her formerly physically abusive but now emotionally and physically abusive ex husband due to his obsession with her. He doesnt allow her to do much and controls everything she does, including her son, so this creates a lot of constant conflict and drama. Last night they got into a big fight and he bruised her arm and she was crying to me and telling me how evil he was and how he is ruining her life. My boyfriend also got into a fight with his dad.

Despite all of this, they are doing a lot to make me comfortable by taking me places and buying me things and giving me free room and board however this is REALLLY uncomfortable and out of my comfort zone for me. My boyfriends stress about it is also really getting to me and I just feel horrible since Im not in a familiar place at all. It doesnt help his brother is a complete dipshit and scammer sociopath drug addict who keeps stealing his familys shit and making sob stories about it. Thats not even half of it, its just a fucking mess.

The sad part is my family back at home are incredibly messed up too, they are very oppressive and psychologically abusive and very emotionally distant people. But this family is like extroverted where mine is very introverted, both highly problematic but in different ways. I have the choice to go back home in two months if it gets really bad fortunately but I was supposed to move here even tho its extreeeeemely risky and my family warned me against it.

Im just hoping things go well but I know its just gonna be a shitfest on shitfest. I feel lost.

No. 430960

This is incredibly bizarre, with some differences this is incredibly similar to a situation I was in once (LDR, new country, learning new language, living with parents who have a weird relationship, and sociopath druggie brother)

Idk where you are in your relationship with your bf anon, but time, securing our work lives, and moving into our own place helped. I get that it’s stressful to be in the middle of someone else’s shit (especially when you already have your own), but unless you can make yourself independent you’ll be trapped. Ask yourself if it’s viable for you to make yourself independent in the country you’re already in, or if it makes more sense to go back to your home country and prepare there. Be honest with yourself and don’t let idea of “being wrong” about your previous decisions stop you.

It’s your life and your sanity. Don’t let someone’s (i.e. your family’s) opinion about the choices you’ve made for yourself stop you.

No. 430963

Thank you so much, it makes me feel a little less crazy and anxious knowing someone was in my situation before and did the right decisions to get out of it. Both me and my boyfriend are in our early twenties so we have time to adjust ourselves and get our things right but its still very anxiety inducing for both of us. I will see where this goes and do a lot of self reflection and introspection, for the sake of my sanity and my boyfriends. Again thank you a lot

No. 430972

Sometimes I feel like boys who grew up fatherless get more sympathy than girls. Maybe girls get more attention, but it's always about sex and daddy issues because men love that shit. This is just how I see it.

My brother and I grew up fatherless, and many times when it has come into conversation people have said ''ohh but your brother, he never got to have a male role model! etc'', and they make it seem like it was worse for him. Yet he's doing just fine in life and I am utterly broken. I was 14 and watching TV with a family member, the tv show mentioned daddy issues and my family member goes ''haha, you'll probably get that when you're older!''

No. 430978

I'm convinced that I'm just a bad person and that there's nothing I can do about it. No matter who I befriend or date, they all eventually come around to say that I'm toxic in one way or another. And I always try to change and listen to what they say to make them feel better, but everyone ends up leaving no matter what, saying that I haven't changed in the slightest, and I'm so tired of it. I think I really am as bad as they say if it keeps happening and I can't maintain any kind of relationship. I wish I could change, but it's not realistic anymore. I feel like I should just stop trying.

No. 430979

You are right its always about sex and daddy issues. Every thing about women gets fucking sexualized into stupid porno shit

No. 430982

Every struggle* women face gets fucking sexualized into stupid porno shit

No. 430986

True thats even worse

No. 430988

I think you're right but it's more about issues in general. Absentee parenting, abuse, trauma, etc. Women and girls are always expected to cope quietly, lest we be called attention seekers, while men and boys are coddled and called brave for opening up about it.

It makes me extremely pissed off.

No. 430990

I see this a lot and if you look at (incel)sites like Reddit you see a lot of men blaming their failures in life on the fact that they had no male role models and didn't get to learn how to be a ~real man~ and they get so much sympathy, as if they were tortured by their mothers or something.
But of course the struggle of the mothers and the sisters aren't even discussed cause who cares right?

No. 430999

Well shit I was here to vent but holy fuck that is truly Kafkaesque and puts my own petty shit in perspective. I'm so sorry anon, you're in my thoughts today.

No. 431008

blogpost: I grew up with a father figure, but one who is mentally ill and whose issues showed up in my teens. My father had a horrible childhood and people excuse that a lot, but it feels like no one like those incels would excuse mine or my paternal aunt's even if I told them some of the horror stories I've gone through and would just blame "daddy issues" because I was older when they happened or because it "wasn't that bad" which I'm not saying is wrong, my dad definitely had it worse, but it matters. Like oh lol you have daddy issues, that's why you dated an older man, not that I was a mildly naive shit who tried to judge based on character and managed to land a manchild, or that maybe it's fucked up for that man to have reeled me in instead of rejecting me. We have a complicated relationship because I ended up feeling like my brothers' father figure due to some of the situations, and people tell me I didn't need to be or I'm not, but what am I supposed to do? Just let my mom handle everything? My aunt did all of the "daddy issue" shit like having babies, hard drugs, being a prostitute, and it's just sad, no one in my family would ever mock it like that, but I'm sure there are people who would mock her but praise my dad because my dad made it mostly out of the cycle at least externally, his issues are just what we see and stem directly from maternal abuse and abuse from father figures and not having his father in the picture.
I don't have it nearly as bad as a lot of fatherless people or people with really abusive fathers, but the cycle of abuse trickles down and makes broken people if they don't become horrid abusers themselves. It's fucking sad, not something to mock in girls who try to come out about it. Do they really believe not having a good father figure is a tragedy for men but pornographic and just whiny for women? It's a fucking tragedy regardless.

No. 431014

sorry sage for doubleposting/samefagging, IATA: I forgot to mention, the mother in his case was abusive and kept being abused by subsequent fathers of her children, boyfriends, etc and she wanted men like her father, who I think was gone a lot in the military, she was chasing after him through men my parents think. The father of her child/children left her for her close friend, leaving her with the kids..how isn't that heartbreaking? How is that just daddy issues? Fuck those men, let them live the life of someone who has had someone's child and ended up repeatedly abandoned and abused. I'd love to see them live with a uterus and have to carry babies to term only to have the father leave them and beat them, maybe then they'd fucking understand. How can women who have never had children get it, but they can't?

No. 431024

File: 1562433366631.jpg (74.19 KB, 720x706, IMG_1341.JPG)

I'm the anon you replied to and I'm really sorry that you had to go through all of that. I was dealing with a lot of emotional abuse too and you just tend to carry that shit with you alone and it takes you almost your entire life trying to get past that but I truly hope you're in a better place now- physically and mentally.

No. 431027

File: 1562434003469.jpg (57.8 KB, 500x625, 101722.jpg)

I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel empty and bored of people and I feel like it's a lot of trouble keeping up with them and don't really care about getting to know new people. If I didn't have sexual urges a lot, I'd think I was schizoid.

It probably has to do with how I've grown up. I never had a family since I was born, it's just been me and my mom and my mom neglected me and when she didn't, I was the victim of her anger and stress. I didn't have any friends growing up except for one really good one online that lived across the country. Loved her the most, took her for granted and lost her. Miss her everyday and feel like I'll never bond with anyone like I did with her again. I was harshly bullied at school and when I came home, it was the same thing. I always thought I wanted a boyfriend, I got one, got another one, they didn't make me feel anything special either.
I don't know if it's because I'm not meeting the right people or what.

I sincerely wish I could feel connected to others.

No. 431093

Job rant. I love the company I work for, and honestly it is very pleasant for retail. I'm just so fucking tired of the store being under staffed and I am mostly the one affected.

The store has a total of 8 tills, and 5 need to be open on the average day. However I am lately the only till open, as we all the only person on the shop floor. This means the queues are awful even if it is going "smoothly." However, every always goes to shit several times a day.
The biggest issue is that the tills crashes alot, which locks your user into it. This means I can't just jump on another till. Today that happened and I was ringing for help for 20 minutes. Non stop ringing. Customers were obviously pissed as well. But it's not like I could leave the shop floor, because that breaks all kind of rules. It's fucking stupid the amount of pressure I am put under.
Several customers complained to the manager today about how awful the under staffing is, but it isn't going to change anything. Cuts were made purely for profits. I know I'm going to have the same thing tomorrow and the day after and the day after and I just can't be fucked anymore. Minimum wage shouldn't be this much stress.

No. 431095

I hate how the altcows thread is literally just the same one or 2 anons (seems like only one by the way they type) every 2 posts that aren’t photos and their replies are like books it’s so fucking annoying

No. 431100

I live in a niceish area, but people get their homes broken into fairly regularly (there's like a few a week in my small town.) People on the same street as me have been broken into, but my parents won't lock doors and windows over night. This is so fucking stupid and I don't fucking get why this is even a debate. They literally told me to "get the fuck over it and stopping being so ocd" just now because I went to close and lock the back door before I went to bed. These are ground level doors and windows. I don't have a lock on my door (not allowed) so obviously it causes me great distress. Normally I wait until everyone is asleep and go lock everything, but like why should I have to do that? I've come home at 1am to find the front door wide open, and when I told my parents they just called me a psycho. I don't understand if they're doing this just to upset me, as they are abusive. Or they think nothing will happen? This is so fucking retarded.

No. 431104

I wish people would stop bringing up lolcow on other sites. I’ve seen reddit users in the r/instagramreality board (which is a retarded af place in itself) post about it multiple times now, and bringing it to attention on Reddit or 4chan is half the reason why guys come here

No. 431126

i have more pressing things to worry about but i'm bummed out about not being able to play FFXIV. i don't have the specs or the hard-drive space for it & unless an absolute miracle occurs soon i won't have them for a while lol.
oh well.

No. 431131

That sounds especially annoying and gave me a bit of anxiety while reading it. I'm very sorry anon.

It makes me thankful that my parent's lived in LA while Richard Ramirez was at large lol

No. 431173

My boyfriend is
A fat fuck
Has no chin or jaw
Has a tiny, fat encased penis
Practically deaf
Cringe worthy
Has zero self control
Has owned tranny porn
Has anxiety
A picky water
Not funny
Not funny
Not funny
A Mama's boy
Dresses like a child
Dyes his gray hair
Has tits
A putz
A klutz
A hypochondriac
A neurotic
A blind optimist
Has a weird, unnatural gait
Lies to cover up not understanding

No. 431174

*Picky eater

Fat also

No. 431182

What did you ever see in him, anon?

No. 431188

…Dump his ass, anon. I know that's the stock answer here but it is also usually the correct one.
>tranny porn
>tiny dick
>everything else

No. 431195

you dropped the "ex" part

No. 431204

i wish to discuss anime but most anime focused parts of the web are filled with men…which would be acceptable if they weren't all weird elitists and jojo meme spammers.
i guess nothing beats getting your friends into your interests and hoping it sticks, but i haven't had any friends for the past two years and it doesn't seem like this will change anytime soon; what can you do.

No. 431206

i spent literally the last 2 weeks watching my bf play fucking overwatch every. day. and the one game i do like to play, Sims, was ~mysteriously~ undownloaded. i spent literslly 75 mins downloading my dlc over network to play but all of a sudden its not downloaded when he can sit there and play overwatch all day congratz on getting silver in comp but when can i have my fun too

No. 431210


No. 431222

My bunny just passed away only about 2 weeks after I got her. I took great care of her, gave her proper food, hay, and water, she still died. It was my dumbass fault for buying her from a shitty pet store when I know damn well they all get their bunnies from breeders. Not sure if this is the right thread for this but I needed to get it off my chest.
Anyway RIP Mia.

No. 431227

look i love him but i didnt get w him for his video game skill okay

No. 431243

Fuck… why are you with him in the first place?
Rip Mia, she is in a better place now

No. 431247

File: 1562483628286.jpg (58.75 KB, 460x613, awQR3DD_460s.jpg)

My whole family is mental but this one in particular is the worst.
>Always in the victim mentality
>Married 3 times
>Threw her kids from previous marriage on her parents who are old
>Married to a younger man with 7 years age gap
>Wants more kids from her current husband to fix her failing marriage
>Damaged body image
>No sense of self
>Had work done
>Thinks she is one of those Instathots
>cOnEnT CrEaToR
>Aggressive 98% of the time
>Teases people all the time
>When someone fights back she does what she is good at: playing the victim
>Can't take care of animals despite always bringing them to die in her flat
>Has a depressed cat who is fur on a skeleton
>Zero responsibility
>Refuses to do therapy or get any form of help
>But SHE is the victim and will fight you if you say otherwise

No. 431253

File: 1562487056777.jpg (518.77 KB, 1242x1225, ba7c2819-eeac-4ef8-b414-74d80f…)

I want to desperately leave my NEETdom. Been shut in for 5 years and I have a very big fear of men. Last time I went outside which was in November 2018, I caught a man smiling at me and the second I got home I threw up from fear/anxiety. I want to be normal so badly, but I don't know how to help myself.

No. 431279

Wow what a cow!
Oh anon, I'm sorry you are stuck. Find a female therapist that you can visit maybe. Just avert your eyes and wear a baseball cap to the appointment. Or ask a woman to drive you. Eventually she will help you learn ways of coping with the anxiety you feel.
Please don't let men keep you from living and experiencing the world.

No. 431283

as a sizeable twitch streamer i deal with so much fucking entitled manbabies on a daily basis that i wonder how much longer i will be able to handle this

No. 431285

I feel guilty and drained for talking with other guys, I'm a talkative person but my boyfriend isn't and I somehow found a handful of dude whom I talk with often we chat and we're kinda friends except for that some of them fancy me and I'm aware of( some even confessed it) yes they all know that I'm taken but I still feel like it's unfair to my man, I tried cutting ties with them and they would still contact me back and I did explain it and they would still see no problem in me talking with them but I don't wanna do it.
I did try to make friends with girls but I always end up ghosted.
I'm stopping this for good.

No. 431291

I second getting a female therapist. In the meanwhile don't read the manhate thread it's about venting about the worst. I hope you will be able to go out and feel more okay soon.

No. 431299

Orbiters aren't your friends anon. They don't care about your feelings and are selfish. They don't care you have boyfriend because they just want to talk to a girl.

No. 431301

My boyfriend's mom's birthday is the day before mine, so we've been celebrating our birthdays together for the past years.

My birthday will be in the next few weeks and as usual, I'll bake a nice birthday cake for their family, spend the entire week-end with them and just sit in silence as they all speak their native language that I don't understand. The only thing I have to look forward to is the game I bought for myself, but I won't get to play it until the next monday.

I wish I'd appreciated my birthdays more as a kid, it was nice to have my parents cook my favourite foods and spend time with me. Nowadays it feels like I'm the third wheel on my own birthday. My in-laws don't even wish me a happy birthday, I'm basically just their cake supplier.

No. 431305

take yourself out for your bday and tell then in whatever shitty language they have that they can make their own cakes, ungrateful cunts

No. 431311

You should go away for your birthday.
If your boyfriend won't go with you, go somewhere to visit a friend for a couple of days. Reclaim your birthday.

No. 431312

Which language?

No. 431319


fuck them, you should do something nice for yourself on your birthday & not have to worry about doing shit for other people

No. 431323

Cantonese. I'm learning Mandarin but I don't know enough to understand their conversations, and they don't know enough English to talk to me much.

Thanks anons, I was a bit worried I was being selfish. I'll ask my boyfriend if we could spend just his mom's birthday with them instead of the whole week-end, and go on a date the next day. All I want is to spend some quality time with him on my birthday.

No. 431325


you’re not being selfish at all. Hope you have a fun and relaxing birthday with your partner, anon!

No. 431328

File: 1562514002320.gif (911.09 KB, 320x180, sfhbdshfhdhjhfjhsd.gif)

One meal a day is super easy to do EXCEPT on weekends when I'm home and food is readily available, plus having the time to go out and there's literal food places across the street. The temptation is always around. It's not even that I have much in the way of snacks, my hungry ass just wants to get up and cook a full meal.
I've already had canned kippers and two slices of bacon. I was hoping the protein in me would stave the hunger. That was three hours ago and I could already eat again. It's not even noon.

The weekend has been exceptionally long due to the holiday and I'm actually alright with going back to work tomorrow.
At least when I'm at work I sip black coffee and tell myself the food there is shitty and also expensive for what someone gets. Of course there's work to do so my mind is occupied on anything other than food.

I guess it wouldn't be a bad idea to go to the gym today but I hate struggling so much.
>mfw compulsively looking at shit online that I can't afford to take my mind off it

No. 431330

File: 1562514991683.gif (569.37 KB, 500x480, mirai.gif)

I moved to a new place and I'm trying to decorate my room based on some old stuff I had plus some newer things. Everything seems like a hodge podge of shit at worst and vaguely related at best. I wish I had a more cohesive theme, but the problem is I'm so attached to the stuff I have that I don't want to get rid of anything and to replace anything with something new costs money that I don't have.
Weebshit in one corner, girly antiques and witchy shit in the other, pastel rainbow crap, cheap Target chic, pet tank; and it's all tied together with that generic apartment complex beige-faintly-yellow walls that I'm not allowed to paint over and the god awful carpeting.

Absolutely terrible.

No. 431331

One meal a day just sounds like you're fucking up your body though, I can't think why you would do that?
Snack on vegetables, keep busy, drink water, move your big meal to lunch and instead have fruit or yogurt for breakfast

No. 431334

Usually it's called intermittent fasting, and there's nothing inherently wrong with it as long as anons are meeting their nutrient macros with their meals and aren't eating junk.

No. 431338

random but what's your job?

No. 431342

Brainless desk job where interact with people and do chart entries. It's not stressful.

I've had a lot of weight loss success with it. I take vitamin supplements in case I don't always have a good day but >>431334 is right. Someone mentioned omad on here awhile ago so I went to a subreddit to learn more about it. tl;dr there's no such thing as starvation mode and unless one dangerously undereats there aren't issues.
I was the type of person who'd take advice like yours and run away with it. Like I'd eat the yogurt breakfast, veggie snacks, fruit, drink plenty of water, yet still want to binge at the end of the day. This diet works for me because it gives me a stricter structure and a goal to focus on.

Typical day is vitamin supplements before work with water, a couple cups of black dark roast coffee at work, more water, and then 1200 calories to work with at dinnertime. If I have to cheat like what happened today, I do all protein and low carb.

No. 431349

there's a lot of new studies about intermittent fasting that show it may fuck you up in the long run.

No. 431353

It really disgusts me that there are people who support illegal immigration not even because they're under the misconception that people from struggling countries will live better lives, but specifically for the easy, exploitative labor derived from human rights violations. The nonchalance some of them have about this opinion is pretty shocking, too.
I remember one murrican anon here who said she wanted illegal immigrants so she could have tomatoes in the winter, as if that's fair and doesn't make someone sound like a fucking cartoon villain when you think of the stipulations behind it. How can you go through life thinking like that, and not imagine yourself as someone who deserves the guillotine? Like…it's actual sociopath shit. I just can't understand it. These same people would have definitely been fighting to keep slavery legal a century ago.

No. 431357

What does that mean and wouldn't anyone following a daily CICO deficit be fucked then? Are you sure you're not thinking of multi-day fasting?

No. 431361

I'm laughing because that anon thinks cheap produce are going to be the only result of cheap labor.
What she ought to be concerned about is the flux of educated, desperate people fleeing their home countries who don't mind working under what we would consider terrible conditions in fields that aren't just agriculture and manual labor for sub $15/hr.

No. 431366

File: 1562520737982.jpg (36.54 KB, 500x366, 1431950083784.jpg)

I turned 24 a few days ago and I'm so frustrated and embarrassed that I have nothing to show for it.

No college education, good job or my own place. The only thing I kind of have going for myself is a nice body that I worked hard for.

Having no money fucking sucks.

No. 431377

So I'm chatting with my boyfriend through messenger, and at one point I disclose to him my new plans for the near future, something that could really be life-changing for me but it's also risky.

His response? He ignores it and sends me an unrelated reddit doggo post and is like "look at this cute doggo".

I'm like "dude…i'm talking about my future here, what the fuck"

Only for him to get butthurt and write, let me cite it:
>From now on I’ll make sure to follow a very strict conversational structure and respond to every message you send before sending you anything extraneous. Since apparently it is very very very important to you

I feel like an idiot for posting this dumb shit here but I needed to vent it. What is this autism?

No. 431383

>respond to every message you send before sending you anything extraneous
Uh, yeah, that's how a conversation fucking works. He sounds insufferable and I don't blame you for getting annoyed because that shit gets on my nerves so badly. It wouldn't be okay to randomly ignore something and change the subject in a real life conversation so I don't know why people think it's okay to do it over text. Tell him he's being a whiny bitch and if he doesn't feel like discussing a serious topic he can ask to talk about this later like an adult instead of completely ignoring you like an autist.

No. 431385

File: 1562529572940.jpg (97.71 KB, 678x760, tumblr_ouocowvFIG1rp1x6so1_128…)

hey all, it's >>430185 anon again with a small update: i haven't reached out to that now-ex-best friend since that text exchange i mentioned, nor have i heard from her. i will dip into even more blogging territory for this post to vent some more.

our friendship actually began when we were freshmen in high school – she was deeply immersed in her anorexia and after i'd confessed to her that i was struggling with eating disordered habits as well, that's mainly when we hit it off. not to mention me having dated her older brother the year prior and him having told me she was anorexic over summer break. i've always been naturally thin (extremely premie baby) and she ended up telling me i was who she'd wanted to look like when she began her "diet" the year before.

my relapses into my ed have always been tied to her since i'd learned that she idolized me, but our positions would be flipped. whenever she was doing poorly, i would be almost at a healthy weight and vice versa. it's like we'd trigger each other.

after we graduated high school and i knew i wouldn't see her every day anymore (she goes to school out of state) i had the hardest relapse i'd ever experienced. she came down to see me that christmas and kept on about my kidneys failing if i kept going; i ignored her and continued on until she cut me off. i only recovered for her.

i've been what i'd consider "recovered" for the past year or so until the shit that happened with her the other day. this is why i say my relapses are tied to her – she abandons me and i immediately revert back to behaviors, worrying my partner who is now the only reason for me not to completely give up.

i'm beginning to realize that i always base my reasons to recover entirely on others and the fear of them abandoning me if i don't change, and never do it just for my own sake. i should talk to my therapist about it next session but i guess i just wanted to know if any other anons have ever been in a similar boat or had advice. i know now that my friendship with that particular woman was never healthy to begin with and i'm probably truly better off, but it still aches.

No. 431386

Friend's mum is in hospital. I'm so worried and am just hoping with everything I've got that she's okay. My mum was very ill in hospital several years back and could've died, so I know how scary it is and just wish I could do more to support him. We live in different countries though so it's hard.

No. 431387

He sounds rude and immature. You might want to rethink your relationship with him since he obviously does not care about what you need from a partner. Curious, what did you tell him that was so important?

No. 431388

Well I had the same thoughts and told him similar thing (although in a nicer way), he got even more butthurt.


No. 431395

Fuck I would hate that so much. My boyfriend doesn't do that but sometimes when I tell him some good shit that happened to me (even when he's the one who asked about it), he'll just respond with "epic". It's beyond autistic and it makes me feel like he doesn't care. Young dudes these days are fucking weird.

No. 431399

I've known people like this. He didn't reply because he doesn't have anything positive to say in response, either because he isn't capable of being happy for/supporting others, or because he's bitter/jealous/afraid you'll leave him for better things. Then when you called him out on it he couldn't explain the real reason (he might not even know it himself), so he got defensive and tried to make you look like the irrational one. That's my armchair, anyways.

No. 431400

I've told him that I'm thinking of going back to university to complete my masters degree but before and my plans on how I'm going to fund it (maybe either try going for a scholarship or get a second job…) My job future is something I've been uncertain about lately..

No. 431403

My mom and "stepdad" (they're not legally married but they've been together for the past 12-ish years) are clearly unhappy with their relationship but won't do anything about it. When I was younger they used to argue occasionally, but over the last few years their fights have been happening constantly, and over the dumbest things. Today they got into a screaming match over TOILET PAPER. Every other day they're fighting about something and it's so ridiculous.

My mom has been not-so-subtly hinting that she's miserable for awhile now, and he clearly can't stand her, but they won't do anything to fix it. She's even admitted that she "settled" for him; I think they're both just too comfortable in the life they've built to let it go. I get it–no one wants to end a long-term relationship and start over again at 50+ years old. Plus my mom is a housewife and relies on his income to support her and me, so them breaking up would screw us over financially. But they can barely have a decent conversation together and it's getting pathetic. It's both their faults; my mom can be a real unbearable bitch and he's an immature idiot.

I'm not sure if I should confront them about it or not. I'm away from home most the year (in college) and I'll be graduating next year and possibly moving out. I've just been ignoring their issues and hoping they'd fix it themselves, but I think I might need to step in and tell them to go to counseling. They're both reaching their breaking point and it's getting out of control. I'm just so sick of having to act like everything's fine when our family unit is clearly falling apart and no one wants to admit it.

No. 431408

I don't know why he would straight up ignore something like that. Sounds like >>431399 is right. What does your bf do?

No. 431415

i've experienced this EXACT reaction to voicing displeasure at the way a conversation went with my bf. i think it's a defense mechanism for them to start calling you irrational because they can't handle being accused of carelessness. everyone is careless sometimes and steps on toes etc etc. it's difficult to resist letting them blow the argument up to be all about their feelings.

and they say women are too emotional lmao as if.

No. 431436

File: 1562540229288.jpeg (85.74 KB, 701x722, 1559031053289.jpeg)

I like diffusing essential oils because I like the smell. It drives me bonkers when I'm trying to find oils and the label says stupid shit like "Nighttime Blend" and "Relax" wtf no, just tell me what bullshit's in it. I feel like it's a sneaky way for manufacturers to add synthetic and cheap perfumey stuff.

No. 431446

This. He's either jealous/upset that you want to continue your education or worried what it will mean for your relationship (breaking up, you making more money/being more successful than him, etc).

No. 431448

>>431436 you can makes your own so you know exactly whats in it you know

No. 431449

How does my weight fluctuate so much on a daily basis? I weight myself once a day at the same time (after my morning shit) in the same clothes (sweats/tshirt) and my weight can vary as much as 1-2 kilos. I know it's impossible to gain a kilo overnight, and yet..

No. 431452

Support indie brands then and stop settling for chemicals.

No. 431455

it seems like its just water weight, anon

dont worry too much about it

No. 431461

Whenever my co-workers ask me of a favor and I say no they respond with 20 'are you sure's or act like their mood will be ruined for the rest of the day if I don't do anything for them. I always cave in too. I know this is a bad habit, but I just wanna avoid conflict.

No. 431463

Yeah you're probably right, it's just that I'm a few kilos from my goal weight and it's annoying to be super close to it one day and not the next. I should stop obsessing.

No. 431471

That's why you should focus more on visual differences and measurements rather than the number on the scale.

No. 431473

its good to have a goal weight anon, but fluctuation is normal and inevitable, especially depending on what you're eating, how often you're eating, how much water you're drinking and at what point in your menstural cycle you're at. even if you reach your goal weight, you're still going to fluctuate a bit day to day and thats fine. like >>431471 said focus on how your clothes fit, your measurements and how you look visually.

No. 431481

I feel guilty that my boyfriend is obviously a lot more in love with me than I am him. I absolutely care for him, want to be with him, and want him to be happy. I think he would be perfect for me if he was a little less boring and had more of a personality and wasn't autistically obsessed with east asia. I can't help it, but it's such a huge turnoff for me when white men display interest in east asia when they're obviously just geeks. I can't understand it at all and it's really weird to me. My bf also gets gatekeepy and autistically mentions how he can read some kanji and hiragana when I seriously don't care.

It's fine if its casual and in good taste but…

No. 431497

is the problem that he's more in love with you or is the problem that he's obsessed with east asia? because it seems like the latter to me, and i can understand why that's a problem for you. why is it that all guys are that guy, gymbros, or elitist music/art assholes that are really emotionally abusive? there are only 3 guys

No. 431500

Ah yes, which essential oils are not. Oh wait!

No. 431510

>job hunting for a year
>get email alert for my dream job that I somehow missed while combing advertisements
>click link
>applications closed yesterday

I can't even describe how crushed I am.

No. 431511

everything is chemicals

No. 431514

That definitely wasn't already the point I was making or anything.

No. 431532

File: 1562568907131.png (476.16 KB, 499x371, butteredsoles.png)

similar situation…very isolated childhood with neglectful parent, never shown affection in any form, other kids were freaked out by me, never learned to properly socialize.

moved in with my other parent at 15 who ended up being a womanchild who let me do what i want and so i just did drugs and hung out with loser drug nihilists and ruined my chance at a better future (i was a straight A student before this but fam is dirt poor and i dun goofed by not focusing on school more) my first experiences of socializing were with these dysfunctional pill popping hillbilly punks and that didn't set me up for social success.

decided not to die in the deep south with lortabs in my gut so i crawled north and went to art school (kek), didn't make a single friend. realized years later it was probably because i unconsciously alienated myself from others from the get-go and only other disordered people could put up with that. in retrospect all my occasional female friendships were toxic.

i genuinely want to connect and with age i get better at talking to people/pretending to be normal and not a feral unsocialized tard like i truly am deep down, but the reality i dwell on at the end of every night is…i fucking hate these people. even if i do want friends, everyone my age is unbearable to be around. esp in the art hoe crowds.

had a hot bf who understood me but he went crazy from untreated schizophrenia and i couldn't deal with his retardation on top of my own so now i'm alone again lol. i think it really says something about me that the only person who could see me for who i am is batshit insane and the only people i draw in are weirdos. it also says something about me that i have no friends my age to vent this to and finally succumbed to blurting my ruminations out on a lolcowfarm vent thread after lurking /snow/ for a year and maybe posting 2 things ever.

maybe every single person on earth is crazy not just me and all the people i know and i shouldn't beat myself up so hard over it.

No. 431562

File: 1562580154644.jpg (94.87 KB, 1125x1110, 4agel594vx231.jpg)

I have problems with feeling neglected most of the time, if someone doesn't give me their 100% at any given situation I would feel hurt and sad for days ahead, I even lose my sleep at times.
I'm in a constant fear of losing people/people turning on me, I feel like I'm certain that I'm going to lose everyone eventually so I'm always on my toes when any minor thing happens (at some point I was fixing my makeup in the mirror and saw the in the reflection my friends at the time whispering and I felt in my guts it was about me and I was never the same with them again), I just crave constant attention and love and that is extremely unrealistic since everyone has their own shit going on too. I feel this way even with the closest people to me, and I sometimes push people away to the point they finally leave and I would feel happy that I "discovered" their true colours but surely I would feel regret later, this is complicated and I need to believe in myself again, I need to realise that I'm not as foul as I believe myself to be and people don't necessarily hate me if they didn't laugh at my jokes… I don't know how to do that though.

No. 431563

Sounds like bpd

No. 431597

>just make your own
>stop buying chemicals

No. 431626

File: 1562594791414.jpg (15.47 KB, 300x250, gratataat.jpg)

being mixed race and looking racially ambiguous is so tiresome. i'm west african and north european, but look southeast asian. i don't identify with a racial group as people judge you based on what you look like, and don't feel like i "fit in" anywhere. people (mainly ~woke~ ppl on tumblr) constantly talk about mixed people having some sort of privilege, which might be the case, but our negative experiences tend to get ignored. in lots of cases, mixed people don't get fully "accepted" and end up feeling ostracized. the fetishization of mixed kids doesn't help either.

i'm not trying to make it seem like i am a victim, i just get upset sometimes as people constantly ask about my ethnicity or ask if i'm adopted when they see me with my family. i'm also tired of random guys w yellow fever on social media liking me because they think i am asian/part asian or because i look "exotic" lol. at least i can relate to meghan markle on some level i guess.

No. 431637

My boyfriend / ex and I are taking a "break". We honestly don't fight at all but we both have anxiety and insecurity issues that made it difficult to communicate. Obviously I'm heartbroken and don't want it to be like this, I wish we communicated about it before but now its too late. He initiated the break and said it was because he wants to figure out his future and figure out how to deal with his own problems healthily. I just wish we could do it together. Is it selfish to still want to be together? To do this together? Or is this better / healthier for the both of us? I don't know. I'm really sad about it.

No. 431643

I hate that I can’t loose weight.
I was always on the lighter side of weight for my height (120lbs at 5’9). I couldn’t loose weight or gain weight (when even switching to half and half instead of whole milk)
I then got prescribed abilify and gained 100lbs in less than a year. I didn’t change my diet or lifestyle. I gained so much weight so fast my parents said I looked swollen.
My doctor took me off of abilify and within a month, I lost 20lbs without changing my diet or working out.
Now, I still can’t loose weight (or gain any luckily).
I’ve tried diet which only works if I go under 1000 calories a day.
I’ve tried working out and I end up just building muscle but not loosing weight.
It is so frustrating that not only do I have to deal with my mental illness, but now I have even lower self esteem than before because now I’m fucking fat.
I don’t even like looking at myself in the mirror anymore.

No. 431649

You're a retard if you don't think there's a difference between home-made blends and mass manufactured garbage.

No. 431666

I have a crush on the porno lady from Orgazmo. Definitely my weirdest one yet.

No. 431692

America is a hell hole when it comes to race and ethnicity. No one else in the world gives a fuck about categorizing people by ethnicity / race except America.

No. 431693

Care to explain?

No. 431694

NTA but I'm not American and this is such a lie

No. 431722

Anon is exaggerating but the USA does have a very skewed perception of race. They mostly care about a black vs white narrative, only care about Hispanics once in a while, and SJWs particularly have a weird vision of Asian Americans where they're basically second class white people who must atone for the sin of being the most successful immigrant group. They like big, broad categories that they can simplify to the max, and anyone who doesn't neatly fall in a category is going to face a lot of bullshit.

In Europe we have a bit more understanding of smaller categories like specific ethnicities, especially in countries that used to have colonies and have some specific historical groups resulting from that. I do think Western Europe is shifting to a more dumbed down, caricatural vision of race because of American influence though. A lot of people here stay updated on American politics yet know nothing about what's going in our country.

No. 431727

i hate to say this but my faith in god is honestly sort of plummeting
ever since middle school all i've prayed for is the ability to focus on the things i want and need to do yet fast forward to twenty and i'm still a procrastinating fuck. i try to set schedules but they all fall apart after a month.
if god is really so all powerful and good why couldn't he give me a simple thing such as focus? it makes no sense

No. 431733

I'm a camgirl but I don't really get naked or do degrading stuff yet it stresses me out so much. I do it to escape poverty and homelessness and I'm so jealous over the girls from western countries that had a lot of choices but they still chose to flash their tits online for 1$. I would like to go to college, I'm studying for my entrance exam at the psychology university in my country and honestly if I get in I'm not even sure I'll be able to push through because I'm extremely depressed and sometimes I can't afford to buy medication. Anyway, I don't think I'll ever be able to profess even if I graduate, I'll probably be a low earning camgirl until I'm brave enough to off myself one day.

It's weird how life works for some of us to the point where we don't want to live anymore, to the point where you don't know who you are in this world or what you stand for. Money is such an important resource, I wish it wasn't or I wish I had it, I think my life would have been so much better. I'm starting to hate people more and more. I see so many people from much more developed countries and some of them are actually rich and they complain about their lives when they have security, when they can afford to make changes. I don't think anyone will ever understand my struggle as I don't even really have opportunities in my country and my mental health is extremely bad. I don't know, I just feel so lost in my head I want to express what I truly think and feel somewhere, but now my words don't matter since I'm impure. Everyone hates me and I don't fit in anywhere and I never will I will be disliked and hated and humiliated for the rest of my life and the last thought I'll have before I die will be "Why did I have to live the only life I ever had like this".

I'll never escape this.

No. 431734

I’ll take “That’s bullshit” for $400, Alex
>”Europe has a much more mature understanding of race in comparison to those stupid Americans”
I can smell the smugness from your post. America has a lot of issues with race, sure but to act like Europe doesn’t (and if it does, blaming it on American culture) is just ignorant on so many levels. They’re stuff you can do in Europe that you wouldn’t get away with that you can’t in the U.S in regards to race. And a lot of Europeans seem to have this elitist attitude towards anyone that has a different ethnicity than their nationality even if they were born and raised in the same European nation.

TL;DR: America has fucked to views on race but so does Europe

No. 431739

so basically
america: beginner level babby's first racism
europe: advanced level professional big boy racism
how come some people in the latter group are so proud of this?

No. 431741

>america: beginner level babby's first racism

If only.

No. 431748

>In Europe we have a bit more understanding of smaller categories like specific ethnicities
>especially in countries that used to have colonies
Since when? The French are so retarded that they don't even know the difference between Berbers/indigenous North Africans and Arabs even though they colonized Maghreb and Algeria was a French colony for over a century. France still has influence over there and in other ex-colonies, and there are a lot of North Africans in France but they still think that just because people speak a specific dialect of Arabic suddenly they're Arabs. I'm sure they also don't know shit about other African countries, and your average French adult will mostly just know about Québequois having a weird French accent. I could keep talking about it for days but European countries can be really racist, just in a different way than the USA. And in France at least they're insanely passive-aggressive and they will definitely make you doubt yourself if you're a victim of very blatant and illegal racism because of it. Then again, French people as a whole are insanely passive aggressive, I've noticed that Americans and Canadians are way more direct when they want to say pretty much anything.

>A lot of people here stay updated on American politics yet know nothing about what's going in our country.

You're right, but I have a feeling it's because online at least everyone is bombarded with news about the USA whether they like it or not.

No. 431749

I'm so isolated right now. I cried after my husband went to work because now I have to be alone until he gets back. It's so quiet. I think I lurk here a lot because I want social interaction, but I'm terrified of going outside. Whew I'm a mess.

No. 431803

Jesus anon, are you me?

No. 431811

Tf, I'm black and my northern european bf says nigger and it's so disrespectful. Why is there any eurofag who genuinely believes yall is better about racism lmao

No. 431814

Your own fault for being so dumb and not breaking up with him.

No. 431816

He says it in a joking way but it still hurts. I love him otherwise so no i aint gonna break up with his honkey ass. I give it right back to him

No. 431817

File: 1562613438819.jpg (33.81 KB, 620x617, dyi7z.jpg)

>yall is better about
>i aint gonna
Is this aave…?

No. 431818

No. 431819

Me too. Whenever my husband goes to work, I feel so alone. We just moved to a new country and I’ve yet to find a job. Social isolation is a bitch

No. 431823

I'm in the same situation. New country and no job yet. I just chip away at a hobby and keep the house clean until my husband gets home. I didn't think I'd be in a situation like this, but here I am. Rooting for you in solidarity, anon.

No. 431824

>the fact that she won’t break up with him gives him the right to be racist
I mean, I agree that anon should stand up for herself more (at least judging by the post) but that still doesn’t excuse his behavior

No. 431826

Which countries? I’m in a similar situation

No. 431831

Leave him and find someone else that loves you.

No. 431833

Going to uni in September and idk, I'm just feeling anxious/sad about everything. Like, I don't even know if I want to go any more or do this course any more. I'm going to be living away from home too on campus and I'm scared I won't make friends because I'm shy. My course is also going to involve group work so I really don't want to be lonely. Stuff like fresher's week doesn't appeal to me because I don't drink.

I think I should've picked the uni nearer to home so I could commute there rather than this one. I wish I could just win the lottery and not have to worry about this stuff. I just don't know who I want to be.

No. 431835

Same here. If it's the same country I moved to I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

No. 431839

Puhlease. Americans are so racist that the White guys rarely date out and if they do, they go for the lightest East Asians and nearly white passing Latinas. They dont even touch the Arab and Indian girls here because they tend to be brown more often than not, even if some of them are pretty white looking. The only time you see a white american guy with a Brown or Dark girl is if he divorced his white wife and got a import from SEA.

Meanwhile in Europe especially in places like France and Spain its not unusual to see white guys with dark skinned non white women or the children of those unions having white fathers whereas in the USA its always white mothers with dark skinned men

No. 431840

I take it you never actually been to America

No. 431843

I’m currently in Germany originally from the US. Waiting for a job is taking forever. No kids, no school because it is summer break. Just doing a bunch of reading and drawing.

No. 431845

Good luck anon! I've suggested it several times to different anons here, but check out your school's clubs! You're bound to find something you like (knitting? cooking? international club? etc), and GI meetings are usually low commitment and super chill. See if your school has a club fair (they usually do!). Club members will usually be really nice because they always want new members, but don't be embarrassed if you don't want to return (it's expected). If not clubs, maybe something more active like a socially proactive group (not sure how to word it- my campus had a lot of volunteer/politically active groups that were sort of like clubs but a bit more of a commitment to a bigger cause than just a hobby/general interest). Maybe go on trips if your school organizes any (mine did to a big mall so we could pick up any supplies we needed, but a shopping trip is a great way to bond with people).

It's definitely a lot easier said than done, making friends is super difficult, but I believe in you anon! There are plenty of people out there who are just as nervous and scared like you. I went 2 hours away to college and living on campus was TERRIFYING at first, but once you settle in, it's an amazing experience! If you're living on campus on a dorm, maybe try to make friends with your dormmates! I would usually leave my door open and a girl popped on by on move in day to say hello and we actually became friends because she saw my wall decor (weeb shit lol) and started talking to me about it! See if there's even a facebook group for incoming freshmen that you can join and post on! That's honestly how I met my best friends who I stayed with all throughout college (we genuinely clicked! it wasn't just a survival thing haha- though nothing wrong with that! I have plenty of friends who I still keep on contact with and are nice people that I became friends with purely to survive classes/college at first).

Worst comes to worse, visit your professors during their office hours and befriend them! You might make friends with other visiting students, and if you don't, you've got faculty who you can rely on for future recommendations/someone to just talk to (I became pretty close with one of my professors/major advisors and he gave me so much life experience advice lol it really made me feel better).

I'm an awfully shy and introverted person but I miraculously came out with a couple of strong friendships and a lot of really vague (but still nice!) friendships with various people I met through the program I was admitted through, classes, other extra activities. Making friends is endless. Honestly, all you need is like one person and then hopefully your circle will expand through that person or you'll build up confidence to approach new people.

I hope you'll have a great time anon.

No. 431847

Oh, forgot to add, but does your college have any sort of orientation over the summer to prep you for what to expect? This is also a really great time to meet people! You're forced to interact with others so just try your best! Don't be afraid to just talk to someone because 100% of people are freshmen too, most of them probably won't even have already established friends (but if they do, they're still probably nice enough to let you into their friend group). During my first week before I met my best friends, I hung out and ate food with the people I met during orientation. Super nice people that I stayed in lowkey contact with throughout college!

No. 431852

i really hope we're not measuring the egregiousness of racism by who white men want to fuck, anon, lmao.
that's some broke shit

No. 431857

Okay so I’m staying over at my boyfriend’s for a few days and i’m honestly already sick of it. The only thing he’s been doing is laying in bed and reading manga. I’m trying to get him to do things together but it just isn’t happening. Tonight we were tired and we were laying in bed together and I wanted to play video games together. He proceeded to play video games alone so I had to watch him play the game. I wanted to try and he let me, but he was constantly nitpicking on how I play the game. I never played this game before, I’m not used to the controls yet. Give me a minute. But he just kept nagging until I gave him the controller back. I was super bored and now, when he finished playing he wanted to go to sleep immediately. He is in bed now and it’s really tempting to go sleep on the couch.

No. 431860

i wish my muslim parents would stop cockblocking me. i don't even want to sleep around or anything, i just want to fuck my crush. let me live ffs

No. 431863

I hate that lately when I go to sleep at night, I have a 75% chance of having nightmares and reexperiencing trauma from my PTSD. It feels like the worst thing in the world and I don't know why they're starting up again.
I just want to forget about what happened, not relive it.

No. 431864

>I hate it when he does X
>But I'm not going to break up with him and I even return the disrespect with similar actions
so disrespectful, but I wonder why he feels comfortable doing it

No. 431866

That sucks, anon. Do you exercise much? I used to have very frequent nightmares (though no PTSD, so maybe it wouldn't work the same) but running a few times a week has made them much less frequent. It also lessens my anxiety in general, I guess because my brain doesn't have that extra energy to use towards feeling anxious.

No. 431880

>2017: find asmr youtuber I like
>2018: "I will stop posting videos because I have a brain tumor."
>find another asmr youtuber I like
>now: "I have cancer, today I had chemotherapy for the first time."
That's honestly scary. Both of them are still so young too.

No. 431890

NTA but I can vouch for exercise helping immensely dealing with PTSD. Even working out twice a week is better than once and it shows. Just make sure you got your heart pumping and you're breaking a sweat for a few minutes. Walking is good, but jogging is best. Take it slow and easy at first. Exercise is one of the best grounding techniques.

No. 431976

Is it weird to want space from your friends? I'm going through some changes and it feels like it would be overly selfish to ask to have time to myself. I worry that I'll probably loose my friends if I don't keep up with them but if I do I won't be able to focus on myself as much as I want to right now.

No. 431977

I don’t think it’s selfish at all. As long as you don’t completely ghost them, and it sounds like you aren’t. It’s totally normal to want space.

No. 431978

ASMR literally gives you cancer, huh

No. 431979

File: 1562650860151.jpg (7.11 KB, 300x168, 2019-06-22-19-03-45--115508201…)

I fucking hate the summer time so much. Every day it's been 95-100+ degrees which wouldn't be so bad in it's own of it weren't for the humidity making the air feel like soup. There's literally no time of the day I can to out and relax or so any of the fun things that are portrayed as summertime activities without being drenched in sweat. Plus I feel so unproductive this time of year without school.
I just wanna wear sweaters and breathe again man.

No. 431985

This. I really really wish I had a place to discuss anime with other women. Every space is filled with men (who have absolute shit taste), trannies and pickme girls who only like what the neckbeards do. Even the fujo community is being wrecked by all the attention-starved underage fakebois screeching at "cishets fetishizing gay ppl!!!" and it was the last fucking bastion for weeb girls. I just have a couple of secret invite-only discords where I can discuss anime with other women but they're quite small and inactive. It's so hard to find female-only nerd communities that aren't riddled with SJW types, moral policing and political sperging.

No. 431989

My boyfriend broke up with me over text and doesn't want to meet up and do it in person.. It hurts so fucking bad I can't stop crying over him

No. 431990

There's an anime general right here on this website.

No. 431991

That thread is slow as hell and all discussion is immediately sniped by random autistic moralspergs escaping their anti-weeb containment thread who see pedophilia and misogyny everywhere. I don't like moeshit lolipandering or isekai wish fulfillment either but I have better things to do than ree over anons saying "I thought this girl club anime was cute and comfy".

No. 431993

I’m sorry, anon. Honestly you sound like you dodged a bullet on how he handled things. You’ll probably roll your eyes at me saying this but it’ll get easier over time.

No. 432003

Thank you and I didn't roll my eyes lol. My mom and sister have been telling me this all night and i do believe them, it just hurts so bad because i still love him and how he ended our relationship

No. 432026

I live in Germany too from the USA! Would you want to chat? I’ll leave an email.

No. 432032

Quick question.
If you had a dog from let’s say baby months - til’ he was a little over 1 years old and your ex breaks up with you.
You were also the one that spend most time with the dog. Won’t the dog be sad and anxious??? I seriously hope the best for this dog, I miss him.

No. 432044

Was it a shared dog, "his" dog or yours? If he bought it and considers it his dog you're stuck. It's worth visiting the dog and seeing how it reacts to see you again.

No. 432057

No. 432081

No, I don't think a dog would have been all that attached to you within a year especially if it received interaction from your ex. If both of you were out of its life, maybe.
The dog is fine and is probably doing dog things.

No. 432109

My arms got so fucking fat in the last few years I want to kill myself over it, it's disgusting. When I lose weight my chest area becomes fucking skeletal but not my arms, I don't know what to do.

No. 432113

Start lifting to tighten the area. It won't be so flabby if there's some muscle.

No. 432124

there's no guarantee it will work like that. spot reduction isn't reliable for everyone.

No. 432134

I didn't mean spot reduction, I meant general muscle growth in the arms

No. 432139

that's what you're suggesting though. the area won't "tighten" if it's flabby already. gaining muscle there will just make them look flabby and bigger unless the fat reduces from that area.

No. 432140

nta but no it wont

No. 432149

i posted the other day about getting in huge shit at work for making a simple mistake on paperwork (mixed up two boxes.) A customer came in and the manager had doubled charged her, instead of refunding her. But that's fine because everyone makes mistakes apparently. Double charging someone is not a fucking mistake, it's a deliberate act. It literally cannot be done by mistake. It takes a number of deliberate acts. I fucking hate this fucking job. I hate how rules don't apply evenly. I make a simple mistake and get threatened, but other people can steal from customers and that's fine. Fuck this.

No. 432159

if the fat is still there it won't look better, retard.

No. 432164

The other anon is right. You have to lose the fat first then build the muscle. The fat doesn't turn into muscle.

No. 432178

You can add muscle if you eat at maintenance. It's more difficult but is possible. The other anon is wrong that adding muscle and retaining fat won't change how flabby it is. It's not the best option but she's wrong about it not changing how the fat lays.

No. 432184

wtf lmao did you take health classes in the fucking dark ages? these two things are not mutually exclusive. also the more muscle tissue you have the easier it is to lose weight i.e. shrink the size of the fat cells. god i hate internet “dietitians”

No. 432191

i changed nothing about my diet, but added in activity that builds muscle, and i went from a flabby boobed skinnyfat to something with a semblance of an attractive shape. it's the same layer of fat, but it holds so much differently.

No. 432197

you guys know there are different types of workouts that yield different results right?

this is because of overall fat loss. if you gain more fat in certain areas it's going to take longer to look less bulky and slim down.

anon should be trying to work out different areas to slim down first.

No. 432204

I'll try and get some exercise in. From what weight should I start lifting? I had some but they where the classic old lady weights lol should I start from there?
BTW has anyone experienced the same growth in their 20s almost as a second puberty? I had no ass or tights but they got bigger and fuller as I got older. After a big weight loss my lowest weight was 48kg but now I'm in the 55kg range and look ok I think. I couldn't keep up with the way I used to eat.

No. 432209

no, not until recently it wasn't really fat loss. it was just working muscles I never did before. i didn't diet, sometimes ate more due to the exercise, and still saw tangible results.

also, I never said I got slim, just that my shape got more attractive. I went from a sad flabby skinnyfat to a 'soft' kinda thicc body. it's the same, maybe even more fat, but it holds more attractively due to muscle underneath.

No. 432212

File: 1562700650757.png (3.22 MB, 1280x1707, 8.png)

TFW you're still struggling with your uni but trying to take care of people around you from the ages of 14 to 45 mental well-being…
I'm okay with the teens but lord the 25+ ones, why didn't those people deal with their trauma and insecurities yet?

No. 432215


Thank you so much for this sweetheart. I'm currently a bit anxious and was about to start crying since I'm looking at uni stuff right now (like the Welcome Week timetable - there's a lot of lectures and a social event that I'm already feeling shy about) and I'm just getting so scared. I really needed to read this. My mum's been super supportive too and says that we should just aim for me to try up until Christmas. If I really can't manage it, I can come out and it's fine - we'll try something else.

I'm unsure if there's orientation, I think there might've been but I've likely missed out now.

No. 432227

I decided to message some plebbitfag and now I'm regretti spaghetti.
First of all he's a kind of fucked up person, not horrible but a mess. I felt bad for him though and…physically attracted.
Second, I definitely came on too weird. Instead of horny posting right away (thank god I waited at least a bit because that would have been worse) I was too distant and serious, I'm sure he'll never reply.
Damned if he answers, damned if he doesn't.

It's really no big deal since I just made a throwaway account, but I feel like a fool. Too impulsive.

No. 432243

I'm hoping the best for you anon! It's okay if it doesn't work out. I knew some people who ended up leaving after the first semester, some things just don't work out. Just don't hole yourself up away from people! That's just asking for an isolated, miserable college experience. I really made it a point to talk to anyone who struck up a conversation with me (a lot easier to make friends if the really extroverted people approach you first lol). There are obviously weirdos to be wary of, but most people are nice! Maybe lowkey advertise your interests (like TV shows or games) via keychains on your bag/tshirt/etc or comment on someone's elses if you like the same thing. Easy way to open up a conversation and you'll be starting on common ground! Go to the social event even if you feel like it'll be awful. At the very least you'll have tried! I never made friends this way, but a lot of girls would compliment my outfit on some days and it's a nice feeling- I'm sure if you're stuck on line for something it's a good way to possibly open up a conversation. Up your social skills and step out of your comfort zone because the sooner you do it, the easier it'll be to make friends, and the easier it'll be to fake your way into being an adult in the real world (or at least for me it worked out that way).

The days before classes started were some of the worst for me, and honestly they might be for you too, but classes open up common ground for students (light chatter before class (introduce yourself!), invite someone to grab food at some point to study, organize a study group, etc). Don't get down if you don't make friends immediately. It might even be halfway into the semester before you make any meaningful friendships! If your course doesn't interest you, maybe take some other random classes that vaguely interest you until you find something that clicks. Maybe some intro art classes, I always feel like those are fun lol.

By the way, where are you located? I would check to see if there's still orientation! My uni didn't let us skip it because they had some pretty important (though very boring lol) info in there (or maybe that's all in your welcome week?).

guh my university has been posting stories on their insta about orientation and it all makes me feel so nostalgic for it lol. My first year was rocky (made good friends but had weird/shitty roommates) and pulling the memories loneliness I felt during the very beginning was something I honestly forgot about, and it got far outweighed by the years that followed. I hope you'll have an equally fulfilling experience anon. Those years were some of the best years of my life, truly!

No. 432245

I'm in the UK. Your posts have been really heartening, so thank you for being kind enough to take the time to share your experience with me. It means so much to me, my anxiety can make me just get wrapped up in myself and just believe that there's something wrong with me feeling this way. It helps to have it reiterated that other people are in the same boat as me and that I'm not a failure for feeling scared about this.

No. 432252

I live in america and this is such bullshit. Lots of white guys date black and mixed women.

No. 432265

My SIL is African American and my brother and I are both white. It really doesn't matter, we love her.

No. 432268

>went through rough time recently, involved a move to a new place
>very few friends actually stepped up to help me despite them knowing what I was going through and me having helped them in the past
>one ridiculously fair weather friend keeps trying to invite herself over
>not to help me, but to use the pool at my place and have fun times
>she's not polite or subtle about it
>it makes me mad

>the last time she came to "help" me was late in the day when I was exhausted after doing all the moving by myself, and coincidentally the last hour the pool was open

>pool actually closed early and I jettisoned her out of my place because I wanted to rest and she wasn't going to help with anything >just talked my ear off about fandom crap I didn't care about at the time
>apparently she can't read a room

>she asked how my move was going recently

>I replied that it was difficult and I'm not done
>she asked if I needed anything
>"Yeah, help."
>she said she'd be over Saturday to help and then swim and be in the pool lolololo
>"You know what that's a great idea! You can meet me at the storage unit, we'll haul a few boxes over, and then we can swim."
No response yet. She's not getting out of it this time lmao.

No. 432297

>meet some guy online in 2017, make tentative plans to meet up, nothing official but we're attracted to each other
>an army recruiter gets their talons into him, he suddenly decides in the span of a week that he's gonna give up his college scholarship to enlist
>desperately try to talk him out of it, he won't listen even though I tell him I'm not dating a soldier
>shipped off to boot camp almost immediately so we never meet up
>forget about him quickly and start seeing someone else
>he graduates bootcamp and messages me 2 months later and thinks we're a thing
>panic and instead of telling him straight up i just block him everywhere
>1 year later
>I'm still in a relationship with the same guy
>he messages me out of the blue somewhere i forgot to block him
>chat with him and apologize
>he tells me that he's still in the army but had a complete mental breakdown and is about to get a medical discharge because he's so suicidal
>keep chatting benignly with him during this time because I'm worried about him and feel guilty
>cut to months later, he gets discharged
>starts being weird
>sends me messages like "hey" "hello???" daily then never answers when I respond
>this has been going on for weeks

I'm getting really annoyed and also worried that his mental health has taken a turn for the worse, but I'm also annoyed that I feel responsible for his mental health. I feel like his breakdown might've been at least partially my fault which is why I feel kinda guilty. My bf, surprisingly, says I shouldn't block him and just wait and see how it goes.

No. 432305

Your bf isn't right on this one, you should just block him. Sounds like he's skulking around to see if you'll take him back, but it's too late. He made his choice and now he's gotta deal with the consequences. If you try to be friendly I can see him turning you into a scapegoat for how he feels. Plus if he's truly suicidal enough to be discharged I don't see what good he will bring into your life, who wants to "wait and see" if he will go off on you?

No. 432331

Yeah, tbh I'm honestly starting to think he does it just to see if I've blocked him or not. I wonder if he's gonna snap if he messages me one day and sees that he's blocked.

No. 432340

anon why would you chat with an army guy after you'd already blocked him and when he was already so delusional?

No. 432357

block him, anon. block him rn and never looked back.

No. 432377

I'm sorry anon :( hugs you deserve so much better

No. 432395

File: 1562736449570.png (126.33 KB, 500x521, rember-wen-u-feel-scare-never-…)

i started EMDR therapy as a last-ditch effort to reduce the hold PTSD has over my life. i've only done one session so far, but had my first night terror that night and a shitton of traumas i forgot about are resurfacing. i know it's part of the healing process but goddamn, i literally forgot a decade of my childhood where i was repeatedly exploited and sexually abused by adults and other kids alike. i'm worried there's more and idk this post is pointless i'm just scared

No. 432412

I've found a lot of fashy radical feminists posting to groyper accounts on twitter, and its turning me off of feminism.

No. 432419


fuck anon that's why i always bail of therapy after 2-3 sessions, i should get my shit together but the fact that theres a chance ill remember what exactly my csa was about freaks me out, i fear remembering and all of that is just making myself miserable for free

No. 432424

I want to cry. I have the house to myself, beers in hand, it's 12am and my internet won't work. My data is minimal too. Fuck!!!!

No. 432429

PTSD really does suck especially dealing with the memories and the symptoms that come with it, but the process to get through all that is to desensitize yourself to the anxiety and be able to stay grounded and occupied. Good luck with your recovery process, anon! It's going to be tough but totally worth it.

No. 432443

You are a brave and strong person. You can make it through this. You will be able to help yourself in the way that you feel like you need. I wish you the best, and I hope it gets easier for you soon.

EMDR is one of the most effective therapies.

No. 432445

Odds are you're just being too insecure and he'll respond eventually. And considering that his only appeal is his looks, ask yourself what you're doing. Are you just looking for some short term fling? Please remember that you can't change people, anon.

No. 432480

>Company says the item is water proof
>(you just have to do this little thing called reording the 15 dollar battery cap every 3 months)
Fuck. They didn't even state to me I had to replace the cap. I had to Google it and I found a whole bunch surprised people too. The worse part is I dont think I can reorder a new battery cap because the company stated it was going to quit making diabetic pumps. I went in to replace my pumps battery and it was full of rust from the water getting in it. I cleaned out and it works fine.

No. 432483

I’m so tired of people using the term “wlw” when talking about lesbians. The erasure of language and lesbian (and even bisexual, by extension) is so fucking disheartening.

“mlm” annoys me too but people are more willing to call gay/bisexual men gay/bisexual and it’s very telling.

No. 432486

He ended up ghosting me yesterday so I'm not hopeful.
I'm not sure what I was hoping for, maybe that we'd really hit it off and somehow have a successful ldr lmao? He's posted about some interests that I'd enjoy talking about, so the looks aren't the sole appeal.
His problems are mostly in that he's obsessively body dysmorphic and had a shitty childhood.

No. 432496

He sounds like a giant headache waiting to happen.

No. 432509

I'm going to write in an obnoxious tone because I'm going to have an obnoxious rant.

Just working with this girl and usually it's ok, but noticed she's been getting more relaxed and bitch in the workplace. She's been belittling myself and others around us all day and I made one snarky comment under my breath and she heard it then focused on me to appease me and flatter me but it was obvious because I was done with her shit. And now because I'm such a good nice person usually and even tho she tried to flatter me after I called her out under my breath I am going to be cringing from this interaction all day!

No. 432572

Please end the pain anons.
I have been dating my boyfriend for about 3 years. I am in my early twenties, he is in his late twenties. I chose him because he has some decent morals and values. He doesn't watch porn, he's not a selfish lover. Men like that are hard to come by. The only downside is that he's a bit of a fix-up project. Even though he is older than me, I have always been more successful and further in life despite me coming from a less privileged background. He's already come pretty far and has worked on himself a lot, he's even planning on going back to university.
Now the problem is that he doesn't like conflict, or thinking about difficult things. I get that, but now all hell has broken lose. With going back to uni there is bureaucracy to be dealt with, finding a new place, moving etc. I have been asking if he's alright for 6 months now, and he always says yeah I am fine. Then at the most inopportune moment, it comes out that he hasn't done anything towards it. He freaks out, he is afraid of change, and tries to break up but he cannot go through with it. Obviously after that I have been a bit shaken up, if someone tries to break up with me yeah I feel pretty unloved and unappreciated. He hasn't put much effort into mending the relationship. Meanwhile he also hasn't been taking care of his own responsibilities. My last few interactions with him the last few weeks mainly have been him moping and being depressed and calling himself a fat piece of shit and then not doing anything about it. It's not like he cannot change his situation, he used to be more active and take better care of himself.
Then today, he was playing video games online. He hadn't even eaten breakfast, he couldn't be bothered to take care of something he already missed the deadline for. And he wondered why I was pissed off that he decided to play video games before even eating anything, and it was already 2 pm. It's like I am the mother of a teenage son. He thinks I just don't want him to have fun with friends, while really I just want him to take care of himself and his responsibilities first. And now he flip flops between breaking up and not breaking up. If it wasn't so special for a man to not be a porn addicted perv, it would be an easy judgement. But he has enough special qualities that even make me consider to keep going.
Honestly I wish I was a lesbian. This shit feels so exhausting and hopeless, and looking around at all the other options there really just isn't much there.

No. 432574

> "wlw"

It's not just lesbians. Every single fucking facet of the language is getting somehow erased and replaced with infantile euphemistic phrases. For instance, people online now just say "lo", meaning "little one" instead of saying child or son or daughter. Fucking Disney language bullshit.

No. 432577

a man in his late twenties who's so cripplingly paralyzed by the mere idea of change or difficult choices isn't entitled to take out his lack of responsibility and accountability on you, anon.

what the fuck is wrong with your bf? he's scared of change, you care about him so you try to encourage him to do better and ensure he gets his shit done, and because you're not babying him like i'm sure his parents and former gfs have done his whole life he holds a breakup over your head all the time?

unless he gets his fat piece of shit ass into a therapists' office and actually holds himself accountable for his anxiety and inability to perform, then you're wasting time, energy and likely your money by staying in that relationship. seriously, who the fuck strings their partner along with "oooh i wanna break up with you…but also i don't…maybe…" because you're demanding he put on his big boy panties and get his shit together?

you said it yourself: you're his mommy he can stick his dick into. either you put your foot down and demand he goes to therapy and gets his act together or you stop covering his manbaby ass and leave.

No. 432579

This is rough, anon. I'm usually the person that says "dump him sis" but what you said about him not being a porn addict is kind of huge. The bar for men is truly so low lmao. You could try going on a break to take time for yourselves and come back to the relationship when you're both in a good place to start giving again rather than collapsing in on yourselves? Well, sounds like it's more him than you that needs the break but it sometimes helps the other person if you pretend you relate to their problems. There's a certain support angle to doing the same kinda self work, like dieting together or working out together.

Anyway, he's gonna need therapy if he wants to pick up the necessary skills to overcome his own shit. Without therapy is extremely hard and taxing on both his loved ones and himself to navigate his issues on his own.

No. 432584

tbh that sounds very creepy and like there's some motive behind it. why the fuck wouldn't you just call your child your child, son or daughter? what was wrong with those terms?
it doesn't help that "lo" is reminiscent of the intro of the book "lolita"
>"She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita."

No. 432602

Oh. I guess I'm having a day where I have no idea what my face looks like and want to rip it off.
Love this.

No. 432603

i recently started to do this temporary work thing at the local hospital, which is also where one of my relatives is as a patient but in a different building. my entire family is always telling me i should ask the nurse in charge to let me out during "lunch break" (which doesnt even exist) to feed and look after the relative.

but i dont have time to go there, and i dont even really want to, ive been feeding patients all through breakfast and lunch im not. and lunch break doesnt even exist, if theres not much to do then you can sit down to eat but its not official. i dont really want to hang around in the hospital after im done. she also already has a large chunk of my family and her friends visiting her several times a day, but ive had so many people tell me off for not going there after my shift ends.

No. 432633

File: 1562788636359.png (657.34 KB, 800x1100, 1520555813431.png)

i literally am unable to eat food at this point, i get beyond nauseous and sick if i eat more than 2 bites of something, drinks upset my stomach too
i'm eating like 300-400 calories a day and dropping weight like mad
this morning my mother told me i looked anorexic and that just fuels my ED behaviors
i'm not trying to lose weight, i just can't eat because my body rejects it and i have no appetite at all, but hearing that makes me want to lose even more weight

No. 432635

File: 1562788897886.jpg (53.92 KB, 640x1035, 12240533028c43d554d904f9682d97…)

>Oh. I guess I'm having a day where I have no idea what my face looks like and want to rip it off.

Are you okay?

No. 432643

My wisdom tooth is hurting again, but I don't have health insurance. I can afford to pay for it completely out of pocket since I have so much money saved up/fortunate enough to live rent free with parents, but now I'm concerned about taking too many days off of work to get it done and recover properly. My work at the office isn't strenuous (lol all I do is sit at a desk and answer the phone that might ring like 2 times tops in 8 hours), but I also don't want to sound like a dumbass answering the phone/greeting guests who come in. Ugh. Just want this stupid tooth to stop hurting. Also, even with health insurance my deductible would be so fucking high that it wouldn't even make a difference if I paid for all of it out of pocket by myself. Probably wouldn't even go through my whole deductible yet!

No. 432653

I’m at my boyfriend’s house rn and his brother has a chick over and holy FUCK she’s so loud. They’ve fucked like 3 times today and I’ve heard her the entirely of every time. It’s disgusting, I’m uncomfortable as hell, his parents are fucking home too. I want to shower but I have to walk by his room to get to the bathroom and I literally don’t want to hear it more vividly than I already can. Is it just me or is it rude as fuck to be so loud when there’s other people home??
I’m uncomfortable and I can’t wait for my boyfriend to get home so he can tell his brother to get this girl to shut up.

No. 432657

If you live in the US oral surgery isn't even covered by health insurance, you would need separate dental insurance. & You have to have it for several months before you're even allowed to use it for stuff.

Recovery would be around 2-4 days tops. You swell the most around day 3 then you're fine. Many oral surgeons will give you a 10-20% discount if you're paying out-of-pocket. It will cost less if it's just the one tooth and if you have it extracted using just local anesthetic instead of general anesthesia. General anesthesia is hundreds of dollars more and will make your recovery take longer.

No. 432659

It sounds like your blood sugar is fucked and your intake is so low you basically go through refeeding sickness every time you eat. You will really have to fight through it to eat more simple, easily digestible and try your hardest to keep it down to overcome this. It’s a miserable way to live, what you’re going through now, speaking as someone with a similar past. It doesn’t make for a happy or full life.

No. 432662

God what the fuck. My parents dental plan was pretty great but I got kicked off because I made too much from my job (I didn't). My dental plan through my workplace covered 50% of the costs after I made the $2k deductible, but when I called up an oral surgeon close to my primary dentist to find out about out of pocket costs, she said it would roughly be $600 per tooth with local anesthesia. Like what the fuck lol. I left that job though, so whatever, fuck their insurance.

I figured I might as well get both of my impacted wisdom teeth out (I think they said they'll knock off a bit of $$ or some shit if I do that, plus I just don't want to deal with it if it acts up in the future). General anesthesia is an extra $650 and I don't want to pay it but god I'm such a little bitch even when it comes to getting my cavities filled. I've had my mouth numbed before to extract all of my back baby teeth (they weren't falling out on their own) and it didn't hurt but one tooth had a particularly deep root and I felt it despite the anesthesia and I have a fear that I'll feel them extracting my wisdom teeth despite local anesthesia ugh

No. 432670

File: 1562792794082.jpg (1.85 MB, 2904x3528, orWQgiq.jpg)

Here anon, this is what I paid for 1 severely impacted bottom tooth to be surgically removed and 2 normal wisdom teeth on the top to pulled. All out of pocked with no dental insurance and only local anesthetic (which was ez pz). I already had x-rays from my primary dentist so you can get those transferred over. Otherwise they will need to take xrays for about $150. There was also an initial consultation fee of $120 just to look at my mouth before the surgery day. I got the antibiotics free of charge from my local grocery store chain and the pain pills were $8.

I hope this helps you plan your finances a little bit and good luck.

No. 432671

If I were you I would start playing embarrassing cliche sexy-type songs when she's yelling or just yell like "WHAT IS THAT? A DYING ANIMAL?" or "ARE YOU WATCHING PORN IN THERE?" I did this shit to my neighbors who were keeping me up at all hours of the night with the girl's fake screaming and it embarrassed them so much they never made another peep, ever. You just have to be prepared to laugh about it smugly if they bring it up to you face-to-face later.

No. 432673

Thank you anon! Thankfully my old dentist is in the same building as the oral surgeon I was looking into so I can get x-rays transferred over easy, but I think they said they would knock off whatever x-ray/consultation fee from the overall surgery fee if I decided to go through with it.

Did you really not feel anything from the local anesthesia? How was dealing with the needles poking into your mouth (another thing I remember hating so much from the time I got my back teeth pulled)? I also read about some people hearing their tooth being broken up for more easy extraction, did you hear/deal with that? Sorry for all the questions! I'm so freaked out about dealing with it all.

Also, a really weird question: what if you have to sneeze and you're only doing local anesthesia?!

No. 432675

I’m so socially anxious that I’m gonna have my boyfriend give them a ton of shit for making me listen to it all day. I can excuse hearing the bed hit the wall but I promise you, his dick is NOT making anyone genuinely scream.

No. 432676

My company has a relationship with a company that provides some of our services, and we regularly have to call them. Today I got a rep who was obviously a male trying to sound like an over-exaggerated caricature of a woman, and of course they introduce themself with a female name. I explain what I need info on and he asks what for. I explain and he tries to tell me the thing I am doing won't work. I explain myself to him as well as I can so he will understand this actual function of my job that is not part of his. He goes full narc rage and starts raising his voice at me, asking if I even use [common service company provides] as though I'm an idiot. Laughs dryly at my response of "of course" and is no longer trying to keep up the woman voice. I ask for another rep to talk to. Troon proceeds to go get his supervisor to explain why he was qualified to inform me about my job function, instead of getting me another rep. By this point I am so pissed off I just give up and go report him to my own management. Ugh.

No. 432679

It genuinely did not hurt at all, aside from the initial needles which you're already familiar with (a deep uncomfortable pinch). Also sometimes they have to wedge out a stubborn tooth/piece so they place pressure on your face/cheeks/jawline. But zero pain from the teeth being removed. I've had more painful cavity fillings tbh.

They do several rounds of injections to make absolutely sure you're all numbed up. So when you first go in you gargle some sanitizing mouthwash and the nurse gets you all comfy in the chair. Checks your blood pressure and gets all the instruments in order. Make sure you ask for a blanket or bring your own small throw because the local anesthetic makes you tremble. Then the doctor comes in. You get the easy first round of injections in your gums and they give you 15 minutes for it to numb everything. Then they come back again and give you more serious injections in your palate if you're having top teeth removed. This is also a test for them to make sure all of your nerves are absolutely numb or they'll give you more, and wait again. Repeat.

They are professionals. My doctor did upwards of 3 surgeries an hour, all day only surgeries. Took 5 minutes for each normal tooth and about 10 minutes for my severely impacted one. All you hear is the drill cutting the tooth in pieces. No doctor worth their degree would ever perform surgery until they are absolutely sure you are anesthetized fully.

If you're worried about the sounds, bring some headphones and something to listen to music on. It'll calm you if you're nervous as well.

No. 432693

The whole town knows I'm an ex TIF and I have to appeal to the court to revert my name change and it makes me want to fucking kill myself. I had already started the process and now they want me to talk to their psychologist too (I already had a letter from my ex therapist) to explain the situation, I'm so done with this, I'm so done. I'm so ashamed. Better just tattoo "I'M FUCKING CRAZY" on my forehead, uh?

No. 432695

I hate how much time I waste online. Like I could be drawing or reading or something but nope, I’m just watching stupid YouTube videos

No. 432705

I find turning off my internet for an hour as a good way to concentrate. You could also try a dopamine detox

No. 432706


NTAYRT but I am long overdue for dental work and have a molar (tooth #3) that may be too far gone to preserve. My anxiety over the pain and discomfort is what has been holding me back. Thanks for the reassurance!

No. 432707


The court wants you to talk to psych? That doesn't seem like it would be legally enforceable. Does your jurisdiction require everyone who changes their name to talk to psych?

No. 432709

I don't know, I don't think so. It's because I lived as trans for a longer time and only changed my name recently because I wanted to be sure, then months later decided to detransition. I was seeing a therapist all through this time and he wrote the letter explaining it but they want me to talk to their psych. That I changed and regretted in just a few months is the biggest issue I guess.

No. 432711

That's fantastic anon, I'm proud of you! Dental fears are very common to have- the mouth is a very intimate area.

I have generalized anxiety but don't mind medical settings myself. What helped me a ton was becoming familiar with the dental profession, watching youtube videos about the procedure I was having done, etc. Demystifying the unknown removes it's power a bit.

We all know ~Le Reddit is a cancerous place but their /r/Dentistry subreddit is quite useful and informative on a good day if you have any questions.

Good luck! You got this!

No. 432725

Oh fuck, I didn’t realize it was such a quick procedure! Haha fuck I’m definitely not paying $650 extra dollars for like 10 minutes… will definitely look up procedure videos and stuff though like you recommended to the other anon! Thank you again!

No. 432729

Coworker said she was sick in group chat and asked for somebody to take her shift and a bunch of people said “sorry I cant” and she thanked them anyway, then I get asked to work overtime to cover her shift (since I was already working that day) and she hasn’t even said thanks to me lmao. Like 15hrs later. I hate feeling like everybody hates me.

No. 432754

my boyfriend broke up with me a few days ago, don't even know where to start and I'm very sorry for how long this is but I'm just really upset.

we were only together a few months total. started having problems about a month/month and a half ago. I found out he liked porn of lolis. I was really disturbed and upset. he first told me that he had to look up hentai of lolis to see small tits and ass because all of the non-loli women in hentai had large tits and ass (I have large tits and ass just fiy). Later he confessed that he actually liked lolis because of the height difference, and how he thought it would be really fun to fuck someone significantly shorter than him, and that it was part of a "protector" fantasy (he said being shorter supposedly means weaker and that's where the protective part comes in). this hurt my feelings because I'm 5'9" and have always deeply hated my height and desperately wanted to be shorter. and every time I expressed disgust for loli porn he would whine that I was making him feel bad/making him insecure. he had a waifu pillow and tons of posters of anime chicks on his wall and 70% of the time when he opens his phone he's looking at erotic images anime chicks. one time he was scrolling through the downloaded images on his phone and there were literally hundreds of erotic/borderline pornographic pictures of anime girls, a lot of them were "monster girls" and lolis (also, this was right after I gave him a blowjob).

he saw nothing wrong with talking about things he thought were attractive that I didn't have right in front of me, I told him it bothered me and acted like I was fucking crazy for being bothered by it. in his words "I wouldn't expect one person to check all the boxes" which like, yeah, true, there are features that I like that he didn't have- the difference is that I didn't need to look up porn and erotic images day-in-day-out of those things to satisfy a desire. again, don't care that he liked those things, it was that he had to constantly seek them out that bothered me. also he watched porn 2-3 times a day every day and I just… began to feel like I could never satisfy him.

we're both overweight amerifags and had talked about dieting together. he made several comments over the course of our relationship of how I would be more attractive if I lost weight (which didn't bother me because the same was true for him). when I would bring up that his constant looking at porn etc bothered me he would say I shouldn't be bothered by it because "that's not what matters in a relationship" (I'm guessing he means sexual attraction) and "you think you're just something pretty to me and you're more than that". however, I felt like becoming more attractive for him was pointless because he has to get so much of his sexual satisfaction and porn that why would he need any from me? if sexual attractiveness and "being something pretty" isn't what was important in a relationship then why was it important for me to lose weight? I asked him and he was like "I want to look more attractive for my partner, I hope they would want to look more attractive for me". and I was like, I do, but it feels pointless because you have to look at porn so much and you keep saying that it's not what's important in a relationship. and then he said "well it's about self improvement and I value self improvement". so I was like, okay, it's JUST about self improvement? and he said no. and it was this circular argument that felt like he was purposely misunderstanding my questions. I'm pretty sure he just wanted me to be as attractive as possible and still consume tons of anime porn (in other words have his cake and eat it too).

also we had almost nothing in common, which is something I knew and brought up BEFORE WE EVEN GOT IN A RELATIONSHIP because I was concerned about it and he always dismissed it completely. but then when he broke up with me he said he realized that having things in common is really important to him which fucking infuriated me. I don't like drinking which is like the #1 thing he does with his friends. I don't like anime or marvel either which is mostly what they talk about. also they always talk about the highschool they went to which is how they all know each other. I have a hard time socializing with more than 1 or 2 people and he wanted to me to be more social with them. also when I mentioned that his constant gawking at erotic images/porn bothered me he said something like "well and ideal partner would accept you completely". yet he was always trying to get me to socialize with his friends more? why couldn't he accept me for not wanting to be social?

when it came time for his days off he would pretty much always choose to be with his friends and not me. he said he didn't want to put his social life on hold for me- not the exact way he said it but he did say he "didnt want to put his social life on hold" and that he "couldn't combine the two" (me and his friends) and that he didn't have enough time to make time for us separately. so basically he chose his friends over me. he said he broke up with me because he felt like he was making me miserable (which he was a bit) but I think he also knows he could have easily made me less miserable by choosing to spend time with me a lone a bit each week and not look at erotic images in front of me but he didn't want to do either of those things. which like, fair play, I know I should be glad he broke up with me but I'm just thnking about how happy I was when we were first together and it's making me really depressed. we're supposedly "friends" now but he hasn't texted me so much as once. and oh man there's SO MUCH MORE I could rant about but this post is already too long.

so basically he chose his friends and 2D women over me which hurts my feelings. he's probably off watching hentai of lolis, and cuddling with his waifu pillow. I'm sure they're better than me in every way, and can make him happier than I ever could have.

No. 432755

Anon, please. You're upset about being dumped by a literal pedo who jerks off to loli. Be glad he's out of your life forever and move on.

No. 432757

Count yourself lucky that you doged a bullet. He sounds like a miserable human being. Real men don't favor anime porn of little girls over a real woman.
He sounds like trash.

No. 432759

Lowkey dude sounds like an evil pedo ngl this is textbook manipulation.

~Addendum to add that I know you feel vulnerable and worthless and lonely as fuck right now anon. Suffer through it and leave him as a part of your scary past you can warn your kids/nieces/god children of one day.

Focus on yourself, lose excess body weight through hobbies where you'll meet other people like yourself and regain your self esteem. Running/Jogging/Bouldering/Climbing/Yoga/Weightlifting/Etc. Stay safe, love u.

No. 432760

You posted about him before and we all told your ass to dump him. Sorry but I dont have much sympathy when you willingly stuck with a pedophile until HE broke it off, and now you're feeling sorry for yourself because you feel less attractive than 2D children. Get some perspective, you dodged a bullet and you should direct that sadness towards kids who have their lives ruined by pedos like him.

No. 432763

lol this is some top quality "there are starving childen in africa who'd love to eat that" shit right here.

No. 432764

File: 1562812561505.jpg (101.81 KB, 500x297, s4eamxv.jpg)

No. 432765

Tf? It's not about comparison, like 'other people have it worse so don't be sad'. It's that feeling sad because you wanted to stay with a literal pedophile but aren't childlike enough is fucked up and selfish. Hence the reminder of the damage people like him cause. Like I said, she posted before and we were all clear that he is a pedophile and she knew it, she chose to ignore it and stay with him, and still wants to be with him. Can't imagine rewarding a pedo with that sort of devotion.

No. 432766

Damn anon it’s kind of pathetic that you got so attached to a weeb in a few months that he destroyed you.

No. 432767

I'm obsessed with cacti. I just love them sooo much and love to grow them. I've recently been prowling estate/garage sale postings to see if they have any plants for sale. I've been getting crazy old plants for super cheap this way but have been spending a lot of extra time driving. I'm conflicted because caring for them is really absorbing a lot of my time but I love them all sooooo much. Sometime I'll lie and tell people I'm busy just to sit with my plants and look at em.

I also read about cacti and joined a local cactus club. I'm like the youngest member by 25+ years but whatever. I feel like such a weirdo because I can't talk about plants with anyone else without them getting bored or thinking I'm odd.

No. 432796

I think it's awesome you joined a local club. I've been thinking about joining local communities too, but like you said it's all old people. All the people are age are still into internet communities, but I don't like spending too much time online these days.

No. 432806

Yes it is pathetic, but 1) we were friends for about 2 years before we got together and he always seemed like a wonderful person, and 2) I have poor mental health and get super attached to people easily and have a hard time getting over them, I'm seeing a therapist right now but it hasnt helped much.

Thank you. It means a lot to me.

I never asked for your sympathy, I was just venting because I feel depressed about it. Coming to terms with the fact that he's not who I thought he was.

No. 432844

Anytime I wear shoes that aren't my running shoes (heels, flats, etc) I get horrific blisters on the back of my heel. I had a job interview today and by the time I got home my heels were bloody, raw and painful from my flats. How the fuck can I make this stop.

No. 432855

Thanks anon

No. 432857

Try wearing stockings or socks, or see if it's just the shoe or size

No. 432860

I also use Flipd. It blocks apps on your phone and tablet

No. 432863

Like the other anon said socks/knee highs maybe. You can build up a callous eventually I imagine. I've shoved folded paper towel in a heal or avoid anything with a back. Good luck,I feel your pain.

No. 432866

You can use blister bandages. Dr. Scholls has gel blister padding if you can wear socks.

No. 432874

I'm not depressed but I'm acting like someone who is and I don't even know what's going on anymore.
I literally just keep not doing things, I just don't want to keep any of my commitments. I'm ignoring so many important emails and will probably get find because I'm just not doing forms, but it's not like I'm too busy or too tired, and I'm not doing hobbies either. I know everybody hates their job and life is a thankless chore but I try my best to just do what I have to in order to enjoy my spare time, but it's like I'm puppeting an unwilling puppet right now. Today I got up in time for work but I just sat fully dressed at home thinking "I'm not going in", waiting as I missed bus after bus until I finally rushed in late.
What the fuck is wrong with me

No. 432875

Tbh youre shit for staying with some wannabe child molester. You sound very young. I can't imagine an adult woman dating some weeb chomo and falling so much in 3 months.

Please grow up and make better choices.

No. 432883

super confused how you fell in love with a weeb pedo who had nothing in common with you, wasn't attracted to you and didn't even seem to like you that much in the spam of a couple months. you should be happy you didn't waste more of your time.

No. 432910

legit i hate people that are the type to go to conventions or any alt people at all, actually. they're always people who have money/come from some money, but are tragically tasteless, like, they will spend $400 on bodyline tier garbage (not that actual nip shit is any better; lolita everything is so tryhard whimsical and/or tryhard elegant and no one with any sense thinks it doesn't look hot topic tier, i don't care how what stupid prefecture it came from or if it was handwoven by walking, talking japanese field mice, it's always low quality and poorly designed) or 'nerd'/'geek' garbage, and despite having money, they are the literal walking personification of wood panelling. i hate that these people have money. some of you guys are like this and you need to stop, it's really embarrassing. i can't escape these people

No. 432922

Same vent as yesterday but slightly different: boyfriend’s brother is having really loud sex again. But conveniently either didn’t fuck after my boyfriend got home yesterday or they’re actually capable of quiet sex so my boyfriend couldn’t justify giving them shit since he didn’t hear it himself. I’m ready for this girl to leave, it’s been two days! Also don’t understand why anyone would fuck this guy. I cleaned up his PUKE off the toilet last week. He has a pile of dirty dishes in his room that he makes his mom clean up. He leaves his nasty clothes in the bathroom for weeks, like it literally makes the room stink horribly. He showers maaaayybe once a week. He doesn’t have a job, doesn’t help around the house, plays LoL all night and sleeps all day.. Like GIRL, is his crusty dick really worth some free weed and liquor??

No. 432927

I totally agree with you after knowing that he plays LoL

No. 432943

get a second opinion, you're likely actually depressed. I let depression run untreated for like 15 years because "oh I'm not depressed, how could I be?". and barely got my life started. (it started very young so I thought I was just born that way) I only got better when I started adopting depression treatment techniques out of desperation to be as close to normal as I could. so. doesn't hurt to check while it's still early. what would happen? you're depressed and can seek help, or you're not and can figure out what's rly going on. no sense in suffering in limbo.

No. 432944

I posted in one of the previous threads about my bf who won’t stop talking about his little miss perfect friend who has everything in life I ever wanted.
Guess who’s at her gallery right now and guess who just spend a shit ton of money on her art so he can hang it up all over our apartment?
And he actually had the fucking balls to get pissed at me for being uncool with that when I just brought it up, i want death

No. 432947

My boyfriend is so FUCKING needy it’s driving me up the wall. He’s been off work for three weeks and I’ve seriously been considering breaking up with him because I just can’t anymore.

I’m pretty introverted and most of my hobbies are reflective of that. I mostly read or listen to podcasts and do crafts, chores, play mobile games or draw. I need some time for myself and I haven’t really had any since he’s been on vacation for so long! I’m unemployed so normally during the day I do my thing and then spend time with him. He doesn’t understand ANY of this and always feels like it’s some sort of a punishment if I want to be alone. (He has his own apartment so it’s not like I’m kicking him to the streets.) Then he gets mad and god knows what he’s upto then.

I just want a relaxing night with wine and kitties and no one asking for anything. Christ.

No. 432948

Be careful anon, I've heard that when a partner can't stop gleefully talking about a friend like that there's something going on. Men are simple minded creatures and when they're infatuated they simply can't help but talk about the other person even at the risk of getting caught.

No. 432950

Agreeing with >>432943, also keep in mind thah you thinking you're "acting" like you're depressive is a very common symptom - look up "impostor syndrome". I'm in treatment for years, diagnosed and everything, and even I sometimes think "I'm just acting up. There's nothing wrong with me, I'm just lazy".

No. 432952

As I've gotten older I learned to immediately remove a guy as a dating prospect if he has a female best friend or describes a woman as being "like a sister." It's all a big delusional front. They would drop everything if the girl wants to be with him, full stop. I don't argue or express my feelings on it any more, I just dump them from my life because otherwise I would basically be the other woman.

I'm sorry for being so bleak, but it might not be worth it.

No. 432954

i told you once and i'll tell you again that you need to fucking leave this dude.

No. 432958

There's this problem of being a lesbian that whenever a girl is more than friendly with me, I start thinking she may be into me. It's probably wishful thinking on my part.

Something happened today and I just can't stop thinking about this girl. She's beautiful and her smile makes me melt. She's probably straight though and today's conversation didn't mean anything. Argh.

No. 432965

maybe you should just act like she's into you (if you feel safe to do so). maybe it will teach straight women to keep some fucking boundaries and learn how to be platonic.

No. 432967

File: 1562862071670.gif (256.8 KB, 600x338, 1559311963418.gif)

I feel weird about my sexual orientation. I love women. I hate men. That would make me a lesbian, sure. But.
I don't experience sexual attraction. At all. I can see a person and say "well, they're pleasing to the eye", but I never want to fuck people. I am completely fine not having sex ever. I rarely masturbate and when I do, I don't fantasize or think of other people or sexual organs/acts, the closest I can compare it to is giving myself a shot. It's almost clinical, detached. Not exactly sexual gratification, more like a button you can push so the brain releases happy chemicals.

Tumblr logic about romantic and sexual attraction being different things makes sense to me really, but calling myself "asexual lesromantic" fucking blows? Also I am pretty sure that's not really actually a scientifically proven thing so it makes me sound like a snowflake AND an idiot.

I love women. I would love to kiss women, hold hands, go on dates and all that. I would love one day to live with a woman and marry her, maybe even have kids together. I would have sex with a woman if I was in a relationship with her and she wanted me to. But I won't feel sexually attracted. And it makes me feel like a failure of a lesbian. Because being a lesbian is literally "being a woman who's sexually attracted to other women".
And because I don't feel sexual attraction I was completely fine having sexual experiences with a man too when I was a teen who didn't know that men are cancer and poison. I really don't like most of the "heterosexual" sex acts though, but I am not exactly repulsed by the sight of a dick and all. Men can be aesthetically pleasing to me just as women are.

Just… ugh. I shouldn't question myself, I'm 24 for fucks sake.
And how do I even go about dating people? Tell them outright "I like you, but I am not sexually attracted to wou or anyone and while we can have sex, I would only do it to please you"? Sounds like an asshole thing to say. Lying though seems even worse. Would anyone even be willing to date me if I'm not into sex that much? Most of the lesbian scene in my country is dating apps and clubs and those are for the explicit purpose of sexual intercourse.
I feel like the embodiment of a "useless lesbian" stereotype and I often doubt that I even deserve to be called a lesbian.

No. 432970

I just wouldn't like to come off as a predatory lesbian. I know it sounds stupid but I've heard and even read here on lolcow, anons complaining how lesbians are aggressive so I dread making the first move or even making a girl uncomfortable by assuming her being flirtatious and more touchy equals her being interested in me.

I don't want to give lesbians a bad name. It sucks because I really want to know whether she's into me or not and it's not that everyday I get a girl who has things in common with me and be so into me at the same time.

I'm in southern europe and live in a small town, so it would be awkward if I made a wrong move. I was unpleasantly surprised when a few girls told me that they think gay people are sick and they'd have no problems having them 'removed' from the society. After a few talks like that, I really like to keep a low profile as much as possible.

No. 432975

No, I know how you feel, about the predatory lesbian thing. I'm just frustrated that we're supposed to cower in shame of ourselves when straight women can continuously "be flirty and more touchy" and then demonize us for responding to it. It sounds incel-tier, but it's how I feel. I'm sorry to hear that you live in a place like that though, I hope attitudes change for the better soon.

Maybe start by asking her views on lgbt stuff?

No. 432976

Yeah… one day I wont be a fucking doormat and just do it…

He has only female friends, which isnt really bothering me too much because men are fucking exhausting so I get it, but the way he just talks about everything great she does is really really annoying. She literally called him after having sex with her bf for the first time to tell him about it and I just really really hate that. She even once called him to ask what kind of birth control I use and ehat lube he would recommend. I havent talked about our sex life like that with anyone becausenI think its rather tasteless and kinda because i dont have friends lmfao

If I find out he ever tried fucking her I will break up with him in a second. Even if it was before we met each other. He tells me he had feelings for the bitch and still wants me to be cool with her in my own four walls, its over.

No. 432978

men don't do shit for women they don't give a fuck about, they literally aren't people to them. the fact that he's entertaining her this much at all is suspect. what do you think he was thinking about when she called him to relate her sex adventures? the type of lube that would work best for her???

No. 432982

I've been questioning like you for at least a decade. I've found it's just easier not to call myself a lesbian despite the fact I've only dated women. I'm not sexually attracted to them either but I absolutely let them know. I've found that a lot of QT types are straight girls exactly like this, so as lame and gross as it sounds to lolcow, they're my dating pool now. My boyfriend is FTT and doesn't mind my sexuality.

No. 432988

My boyfriend broke up with me earlier this week and I'm handling it pretty bad.. He was my first boyfriend so part of me accepts that we're not getting back together but part of me also hopes he messages me to tell me he's sorry… I'm seeing a therapist tomorrow.

No. 432995

Samefag but god I want to message him so bad

No. 432996

> I'm just frustrated that we're supposed to cower in shame of ourselves when straight women can continuously "be flirty and more touchy"

Yeah, sadly it's the way it is. I'm not sure if they're aware of how much pain they inflict when they play such games. I've been used by a girl in uni who made me believe she was into me but in fact did it for attention. She apologized later and we're supposed to be cool now. The memory of that still hurts. But I was stupid and blind. Live and learn, I guess.

btw you don't sound like an incel at all. It's extremely difficult to date as a lesbian even without the homophobia. I've had my share of these situations where you're not sure if they actually mean it or are just doing it for whatever reason, but this stigma of being perceived as a predatory lesbian is so strong that I just can't straight up ask them to clarify that.

> I hope attitudes change for the better soon.

It's mostly small places like the one I'm in right now. Big cities aren't that bad and very few will care. Though knowing that there's still a lot of young people that think gays should be shot is scary.

> Maybe start by asking her views on lgbt stuff?

Good idea. She wants us to go out together (again, might be just a friendly invitation) but I'll have that topic in mind.

Thanks, anon! Sorry to hear that you have the same frustrations.

No. 432999

As much as you want to, I'd suggest you don't talk to him now. Give it another week or two and see if the feelings are still strong.

No. 433001

Why would you want to waste your time with someone who even thought about breaking up with you? Obviously his feelings for you aren't there anymore.


No. 433004

>She literally called him after having sex with her bf for the first time to tell him about it
What the fuck? Fucking leave, anon. There's red flags all over this. And >>432978 is absolutely right. Get out of there.

No. 433006

Anon are you me?

I have no real answers to your questions, but I understand where you're coming from. I want a qt gf but don't really care for sex, but unfortunately it's just something I'll have to figure out how to deal with when/if I ever get a gf. Life sucks.

No. 433008

This sounds like depression anon. People that aren't depressed don't LARP like that in private, to the point where they ruin their lives.

No. 433011

>I like you, but I am not sexually attracted to wou or anyone and while we can have sex, I would only do it to please you
Welp, we are the same. You're never going to be accepted in gay spaces imo bc they so closely identify with their sexual orientation and will see you as an impostor if you are ace but homoromantic. You should probably never tell your partner you are ace, or you should be with a person who is also ace. I'm sorry you're in the same hell that I am in.

No. 433016

I was actually came to lolcow just now to post the same thing, except I've had romantic feelings for men, women, and trans/nb alike. However, I'm starting to realize I have more of an inclination towards women just because they're friendlier and understand your struggles better. I just got back from /fit/ on 4chan and I just feel upset to my stomach because so many replies in the threads dehumanize women and state they're only good for sex and they're not even attractive enough for that. I've fallen in love with so many of my male friends, only to be heartbroken because I got to know their more vile opinions as time went on. I can't keep up with their libido and lust for sexually exaggerated features like large breasts and hips either. I always feel inferior when I'm around a man because they always neg you down, never quite listen to you intently, and always just seem mentally somewhere else. Tell him something important in several paragraphs, and he'll reply back with an unrelated meme or "lol, ok." I just feel unheard, and I want an equal partner. If all the lesbians/bis that flirted with me weren't the stereotypical teal haired SJW type, I'd already have a girlfriend and would completely renounce men. Being conservative and into chicks is a curse.

No. 433023

This is a really old vent, but something made it come back into my head again last night.

I lost my virginity to a boy about 6 years ago when I was 18. It was consensual, I was really hypersexual at the time, and he was attractive- it worked out, sorta. I fell head over heels for this stupid fuck boy, let him fuck me without a condom ("because it doesn't feel as good anon!"), and let him drag me around for nudes and videos until I was completely mentally and emotionally wrecked from it.

We were good friends and chatted about non-sex shit a lot too, but eventually I did confess my feelings to him. He returned them, but said he didn't want to date because he didn't want to do LDR. Alright.

I studied abroad in Tokyo for a year, I was still chatting with him until he ghosted me out of nowhere. I was completely and utterly alone, struggling to make friends, thousands of miles away from my friends and family back in the states, and now I felt completely unlovable and worthless because this fuckboy I liked for so long decided to ghost me for another girl. He apologized about a year later, saying his gf knew we fucked and didn't want him talking to me. We don't talk anymore, and now I'm a lesbian, and I'm so fucking mad at myself for letting this boy play such a big part in ruining what was supposed to be a fucking great experience abroad and letting myself get strung up in all of that. I developed major body image issues and started restricting my food intake, I was basically going down the road of becoming anachan. I almost took my own life at some point.

It's been years now and I've slowly gotten over that waste of an opportunity. I dated a girl for a while, years after I stopped talking to this boy, and wow, it feels great to be treasured and loved by someone you treasure and love. I realized what good kissing felt like, I realized that I'm worth someone's time and effort, and that I'm cute! It felt good to date someone who wouldn't stop talking to me just because I didn't bend over backwards to accept their opinion and their opinion only on things. Men have truly set the bar on the fucking ground. I can't believe that I'm so amazed by the fact that someone treated me with some fucking decency.

Also mini vent about the same boy but when I told him I wanted to get an IUD he insisted I get the pills instead because they would work out to the same price. I wanted the IUD because I like the low maintenance (I have the hormonal one now and thankfully it works absolutely wonderfully for me), but I guess he was upset because he'd have to feel it poking his dick if I rode him. I fucking hate men. Being a lesbian sucks sometimes, but I'd really rather be a lonely lesbian for the rest of my life then settle for a man ever again. Fuck. I can just hear him taunting me if we ever spoke again about how I have shit taste in men and that's why I'm a lesbian now, or that I'm not a real lesbian because I prefer butch/andro girls. Like fuck off, your dick fucking stank and you sucked at foreplay.

No. 433025

Oh my, same. I've had girlfriends in the past and I loved everything but sex. Never wanted to have sex. Vaginas turn me on so I know I'm bi but I just don't feel like having sex. It's just different. My love for women is more based on heart, whatever I have with men is more sexual in nature. Because of this I just say I'm straight now because I'm afraid of hurting someone's feelings. My ideal GF would be like me or assexual and it's kinda hard to find.

No. 433026

my boyfriend has a female friend like this. I befriended her. me and her talk now, and those two dont.
I'm also very close with the girl my first ex/the fuckboy who took my virginity left me for. also the ex that came after me. we're all tight, nobody speaks to him and he's dating an 18 year old now (he's 30)
you never know what's gonna happen, anon. play your cards tight to the chest and play them smart. or dump him. those are your options.
god speed.

No. 433039

File: 1562875608968.jpg (21.39 KB, 500x287, brtAVF1rriwvg_500.jpg)

>tfw bf is annoying me again about how he wants to do it without a condom
>hurr hurr pull out method hurr lets do it on your period

He does it "jokingly" but Jesus Christ shit is getting old. I get that condoms can get annoying but earlier this year he started pressuring me to get on birth control, specifically the implant. I literally had to chew him out about it, so he could get it through his thick skull that I wasn't comfortable with the possible side effects. (I knew a few girls who had the implant; one got pregnant anyway and the other two had growths forming in their breasts.)
He dropped it after that but I'm still steamed about how he only seemed interested in cumming inside instead of what it could do to me. ugh I feel like im being dramatic but w/e

No. 433044

NTA and basically everyone that replied (including me) is saying they're straight women. Did you guys just want validation for being "homoromantic asexuals"? Because that's ridiculous. You're not asexuals, the type of person you're pursuing just isn't your thing. I'm dealing it without stealing labels from anyone, so should you.

No. 433047

I'm a shut in with terrible anxiety myself. I haven't left the house in two months except for groceries and a doctor's appointment. I'm routing for you. As other anons said, you'll need a female therapist in which you can explain your circumstances to. She'll guid you thought what you're feeling and may reveal why you feel anxiety around men. She can help with recommending medication for you that improves symptoms. If you don't want to leave the house just yet, there are online therapists you can talk with via webcam.

You're not being dramatic; he's being an asshole. It's your body, you get the say.

Asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction. You can desire to have non-sexual intimacy with someone and still aesthetically appreciate them, hence romantic orientations, but not have that magnet urge that makes you flutter for interaction with someone's genitals.

No. 433051

Lmao, fuck off.

No. 433058

Your boyfriend sounds extremely immature and really digusting. I get the wanting to cum inside without a condom, believe me, but your bf needs to come back down to earth. Being risky over 3 seconds of feeling good is ridiculous. My boyfriend absolutely understands this so I don't know why yours doesn't.

No. 433065

Where the fuck do you anons find these retarded men? And why are you dating them?

No. 433068

File: 1562882530772.jpg (54.75 KB, 505x505, gm4MMvrp.jpg)

Today I had a panic attack while showering because it's already july and I still haven't gotten a grip on my life.

I spent new years eve alone, driving around for hours despite the weather being horrible, because I couldn't tell my parents that I don't have anybody to spend the evening with.
I wanted to find friends but I'm just so shy and awkward and ugly (and autistic) that it hasn't worked out, for years. As a solution I thought I'm going to lose weight, improve the way I look, sign up on a dating app and hopefully find a bf. But so far I haven't made any progress.
I don't want to be alone on new years eve again… My future just looks so sad, I really don't know what I even live for.

Afterwards I made the mistake of looking at the facebook profiles of my old classmates which made me feel even more depressed.
Many of them have graduated already, travel, have friends and a bf, they stayed in contact with each other, but my life for the last 5 years was just shit.
I know this sounds stupid af, but I don't want to graduate, because I don't have any friends at uni, meaning I would be alone during the graduation celebrations. All the others take pictures together, are proud of their achievement, afterwards write cheesy stuff like "Thank you so much my darlings for the awesome past 4 years we spent together" - but I would be completely alone, feeling like shit, standing out as the loser I am and making my parents feel ashamed, disappointed and sad.

No. 433075

How old are you, anon? I know it feels hopeless, but you'll meet somebody. When you're an adult, I think it's easier to find a partner than it is to find new friends because everyone sticks to who they already know.

No. 433077

Anon I am very much like you, and while I haven't sorted everything out in my life, I have found a great boyfriend regardless of my autism. I'd recommend you look into joining clubs or classes in your areas that relate to interests you have. Indulging in a shared interest with people is the best way to be around them and have organic opportunities to talk to them without having to stress about it as much.

No. 433086

>My love for women is more based on heart, whatever I have with men is more sexual in nature.

I don't mean to be condescending to all of you, but it sounds like you are straight but enjoy female friendship. I can only imagine the hearts you will break when you date legit lesbians and then tell them that they aren't attractive to you but you would gladly have sexual thoughts about a man. Women like you use lesbians to comfort yourselves without really wanting what a real relationship entails. Get some female friends. That's what you need. Not a relationship with a woman whose vagina you won't even touch.

No. 433094

My mom is the laziest person and it's so god damn frustrating.

>She hasn't had a full time job in over a decade, she has a small part time job that requires her to work 4-8 hours a WEEK

>Always complaining about how exhausted she is from "working"
>Calls herself a busy housewife, in reality all she does is lay in bed and watch TV all day long
>Hardly cooks or cleans; our house is a mess but she puts all the blame on me and my step dad even though most of the mess is hers
>Complains about "doing everything" around the house when she does absolutely nothing and wonders why the house isn't in good condition
>Totally thinks she does just as much work as my step dad who works 12+ hours 6 days a week or me, a full time college student and a part time worker
>Keeps going on multiple lavish and expensive vacations because she "needs a break" (from what? I have no fucking clue)
>Neglects chores to the point that I've come home from college to find moldy food in the fridge, spoiled milk that's months old, and piles of clothes on the floor that's been there for months

It's baffling to see a woman with no self-awareness. I'll admit my step dad and I neglect our chores sometimes, but for her to act like she's an overworked flawless housewife when in actuality she barely lifts a finger pisses me off so much. Today I reminded her that she agreed to drive me to a friend's house tomorrow and she got super annoyed with me and tried to say I never asked her to that but "sure anon, of course I will sacrifice MY TIME for you"; a) I DID ask her over a week ago b) I reminded her multiple times c) if her time is so fucking valuable (hint: it's not) then she could have just said no instead of trying to make me seem like a burden for asking her to help me out. Ugh.

No. 433109

a bunch of men in my area have gross wirey pube beards and buck teeth and the combo right next to each other makes me gag

No. 433118

I had a hard af day at work and ordered pizza to stuff my fat face. The delivery girl was just V Cute and now I feel disgusting knowing that she saw there’s only one car in the driveway but there’s enough food for 3 people. Fuck my life.

No. 433123

She wouldn't care, she's just doing her job and why would anyone jump to conclusions based on cars in the driveway? 3 people can use one car.

Also when I worked at a pizza place I was eating my weight in garlic bread at the end of a shift and getting jealous of all the customers having pizza so eh.

No. 433128

One of my best friends from high school committed suicide a bit over a year ago. We kind of grew apart in the years leading up to it. I know it's not my fault, but that guilt is still there. I'm doing okay, but it hurts a lot and I think about it every day. I feel like I had just gotten over a rough patch of my life where I was battling suicidal ideation, and now I suddenly can't imagine a future with this person anymore. It sucks. It's getting better though.

god, not dramatic at all. It's incredibly inconsiderate of him to even "joke" about unprotected sex. My ex would do this constantly with me (casually bringing it up, "joking" about it, etc.)… it's all fun and games to him, until one night we were having drunk sex and he came inside of me, all the while I was repeating "no". One of many reasons why we broke up.
if he's aware of how scary and life-changing a pregnancy can be for a young woman, and he still can't treat you with respect, then put that caveman straight in the garbage.

No. 433141

File: 1562906515071.jpg (2.25 MB, 3530x5000, 8904908390830483038903.jpg)

I'm so stupid anons. I've had a crush on a coworker for about a year now. I haven't had one this intense like ever and I was almost sure he liked me back. Anyway this week I tried to make small talk and it was horrible. Now I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm a complete weirdo. Thought the crush would just fizzle out but its just not going away. I hate my piece of shit brain!!!!

No. 433153

God damn I just want to be petty for once. Why you people have to fake positivity even in private messages? You know I’ll never tell!! I thought we were close?!

No. 433166

I stopped drinking six months ago and the only thing I’ve learned is the root of my problem is social anxiety and it’s only gotten worse since I quit self medicating with booze. I used to just shake and get sweaty and stutter but now it’s those things and my FACE trembles and my panic attacks make me cry for hours. Nobody close to me relates to this and it’s a hard thing for them to understand since at best, I’m distant and maybe rude but at worst I’m nonverbal and sobbing. I constantly feel removed from social situations just because I struggle to talk, make eye contact, relate to others while I’m fighting my body because it’s embarrassing to be visibly nervous. I’m American and uninsured so medication isn’t a reasonable option and counselors trigger my anxiety so bad, I’ve given up on every free/cheap one I’ve had. I hate sobriety!

No. 433175

He doesn't respect you. Break up with that piece of shit and love yourself girl

No. 433180

My friend who I haven’t seen in over a month due to them living at the beach during the summer texted me last night that they were home and wanted to hang out. Two hours later after I don’t respond they send “are you mad at me?” Tf is this high school bs, I literally didn’t respond because I was asleep cause I have to work at 4 am. I hate when you have to be available 100% of the time for someone or they think you hate them, it’s a lot

No. 433184

File: 1562915778058.jpeg (65.86 KB, 816x640, 6E1E12BF-364A-4059-B486-360D70…)

I’m going on vacation in a couple of days but I feel like I don’t “deserve” it.

Wanted to go somewhere in Europe against but didn’t have enough money so I’m going to Southeast Asia instead. I thought I was going to make a good amount of money this summer but so far, it hasn’t been living to my expectations. I still want to go but doing packing/buying stuff/researching is so goddamn exhausting. I think I’m depressed again. Sometimes I feel like I should’ve spent this summer getting my shit together.

No. 433185

You're acting more high school than her. Just texting her to explain probably would have resolved it. And you probably aren't that close if you didn't even know she was home.

No. 433186

i feel similar, but i think it's mostly just very low sex drive so i still call myself a lesbian
also calling it just low sex drive instead of asexual or some bs is a lot more accepted
if you're still romantically attracted to women i'd say you can still call yourself lesbian, it's what you're gonna look out for in dating after all

No. 433190

I'll already turn 24, so it feels as if it's too late, I've graduated 5 years ago already and still haven't done jackshit.

I'm probably the most boring person on the planet, I'm neither a nerd, nor have I any normie interests.
Plus I live in a town of maybe 5000, meaning the choice of clubs we have is very limited.

No. 433218

I did text her, I just think it’s extreme to not hear back from someone for two hours and assume that they’re mad at you instead of thinking maybe they’re working or out somewhere. Plus I did know she was gonna be home this weekend, but I didn’t know it was gonna be late yesterday evening. I know I just sound grouchy cause I had to wake up before 3 am haha, but this friend really has had no regard for other people’s lives in the past decade I’ve been friends with her so I guess there’s context. She just expects anyone to be able to hang out or answer her calls at all hours of the day, or take off work to see her at the beach/see her when she comes home.

No. 433226

some people need to kill themselves off of the internet. holy hell.

No. 433235

My bf said he needed a break for a few days for his mental health but it still feels like I did something wrong or like he's going to break up with me at anytime. I told him I wasn't troubled about it but obviously I am. I hate this stress.

No. 433237

not to make you feel worse but people usually break up when they "need a break". relationships that last don't need a break ever and if someone thinks the break will help, they're usually too immature to handle the relationship.

No. 433243

For better context, it's ldr (we used to not be, but school happened) He always tells me that I'm the love of his life and that he's not going to leave me but I feel so conflicted, anon. It just feels wrong. He's super dramatic all the time about not being able to see me and it sucks for me too but it's not a super absolute need like it seems to be for him. I feel like he's always complaining about the relationship and his mental heealth while I try to keep things positive despite me also having mental health issues.

No. 433246

If he's so miserable not being with you, how the fuck would a break help him? That would mean he doesn't get to talk to you OR be with you, it makes no sense to think that would improve his mental health. Too much space is literally the problem, more space won't help unless he wants to break up or fuck other girls with the excuse that you were on a break and then crawl back for emotional support later.

Sorry for the pessimistic attitude but dramatic, emotional men are not typically selfless and considerate. They think their feelings are the be all and end all.

No. 433247

I feel like my bf's friends don't like me much, and that compared to all the girls he's friends with, I'm the worst choice.

He used to be with another girl for 3 years when they were students, and then she broke up with him. Most all of his friends are from that time, and none save two want to add me of FB or even talk to me when we meet in person. I feel like next to him I don't exist, I live in his world and I don't matter. He doesn't believe me and keeps making excuses as to why this is bullshit.

This makes me very insecure so I keep comparing myself to all the other girls he knows. Most of them have stable careers, can drive, have friends and go on holidays. I am an immigrant in a foreign country (he is too, but he's a local) with a shit physical job, very few people know me here, I had a boyfriend for 4.5 years a few years ago and dumped him because he was a deadbeat, then his family said they "hope I never come back", then another one who called me ugly, whiny and immature and then cheated on me.

My bf insists he loves me a lot and wants to be with me but I feel like he's tired of me too, or at least getting there.

I always feel like I'm a villain in everyone's story, someone who came to fuck their lives up and someone who nobody likes and is never as good as the droves of well-adjusted, mature girls with jobs who are always happy and never whiny and insecure. I can't talk to anyone about this because everyone I could talk to is a mutual friend of ours so I'd just be airing out our dirty laundry, and I can't afford therapy.

No. 433251

It's up to him to make you feel more involved and get to know his friends better. Obviously you can't try and improve the situation alone as trying to advance relationships with other males is gonna look bad. He needs to put more effort in so you don't feel like a third wheel all the time.
Are you studying or working? You should also seek to improve yourself/your life so you don't feel as insecure in comparison to these random other girls. Obviously I'm missing context, but what's stopping you from learning to drive or having a job/studying?

No. 433254

A lot of them dont tho and have such racial autism and sperging that would make hitler proud. Or they do it only in secrecy.

I lived in the US for 20 years

No. 433258

I'm so tired of being such a doormat, everybody always continues stepping over me.

My whole life my parents ingrained in me to never talk when others do, to always be polite and helpful, I rarely talk at all and yet my father often calls me arrogant and an asshole, no matter how my siblings treated me, I was always only told that I as the oldest need to look after them. Whenever I complain about costumers mistreating me (and me not doing anything) he ends up scolding me "Is it really so bad, can't you just suck it up and be friendly?!" (even when I told him that I was). I constantly work extra for my collegues, I even secretely give costumers discounts because I'm scared of how they would react if I told them how much it really costs.

Today again, I wasted over 4 hours in a class, because I was too much of a chicken to stand up for myself. I only wanted to ask the teacher 1 question, yet she chatted for ages with others, helped the girls sitting next, behind and in front of me, always only skipping me, until there was only another student, her and I left. I waited til 20 minutes after class, yet she still wasn't finished.
I should have just said "Hey, I only have one question and I have to go to work soon". But instead I didn't get my question answered and nearly missed my train.
Now I have to go again next week, just for something that wouldn't even take a minute to answer.

No. 433262

>needs a break

he's cheating. sorry, anon. he sounds like he drags you down anyway.

No. 433263

Driving lessons are super expensive where I live and I use public transport so I don't have an excuse to spend 1000€ on driving lessons since I can't even afford a car.
I do have a job (I did say I had a physical job) but it's a typical low wage immigrant job (cleaning, kitchen etc) whereas all of them have office jobs in their respective fields and have time to look nice and take care of themselves. Recently I had to attend a wedding in a wrinkled sweater because it was the only thing I could put in my backpack to change into and I had to attend straight after work. Of course I had to take photos and looked like hot shit with messy hair and greasy face next to everyone. But I can't get any other job (I'm applying left and right) because I lack experience and I'm foreign.

No. 433282

My job didn't account for travel hours from my business trip two weeks ago so my biweekly check I got today was short by at least 20 hours. It's a really big fucking deal. I've been settling for part time as it stands and my hourly already isn't very good. My stepdad will be shoving his hand in my face for rent money, but after paying him and some of the bills I like to be ahead on I'm lucky if after today I scratch a little over $100 to last me until the 26th when I get paid again.

No. 433298

I can't speak for the other anons, but for me, I know what I ultimately want isn't just friendship. I do want to kiss and hold and cuddle a girl in a romantic sense, in a way that would definitely overstep the normal boundaries of female friendship. No matter how close I am to some of my female friends, the way I give them a friendly peck on the cheek or hold their hand while going out just isn't the same.

For me, the "whatever I have with men is more sexual in nature" (but I'm not that anon) is more like… I'll deal with it. I don't particularly mind sex with men and I'll accept it if I'm in the mood, but outside of sex, I don't want to hold their hand or kiss them or cuddle with them. I can't see myself settling down with a man, I can only see them as a temporary person in my bed.

No. 433300

You're wasting your breath explaining yourself to your shitty parents. They're in the wrong here and won't understand that you have boundaries and can't just exist to please others. As for your instructor and whatnot, you can definitely teach yourself to interrupt people (politely) without completely steamrolling. Apologetically interject and people will let it slide. Especially if it's a question to a teacher you need to just speak up, no way around it. Same in your career, you're going to have to learn to act confident to get yourself heard. It's a "fake it till you make it" thing, go through the motions even if they're mortifying and feel wrong, and you'll eventually get used to it and do it without issues.

Much love, anon.

No. 433324

I'm annoyed that my most popular song became a meme, not once, but like, 3 times at this point.

No. 433331

Lol I'm curious now

No. 433348

This imageboard is female only, Rick Astley

No. 433349

I'm upset at my boyfriend so I started giving him the silent treatment, he enjoyed it at first but now he is upset as well and no one wants to break it off first, when will he give up???

No. 433353


No. 433361

Rick Astley is a farmer now. No one can convince me otherwise.

No. 433364

Hahahaha no, I'm not Rick Astley. But I have sampled him before.

I'm not famous by any means, I just happen to have a song that's been memed to death. It's a situation where people know the song name, but not the person who made it, I guess.

No. 433366

File: 1562953783724.jpg (35.01 KB, 540x303, c93e6436-414a-43e7-a766-c2d911…)

My exes mother is being threatened by her brother. The whole story is a bit complicated, but the already well off pos war vet wants 200k€ from them because of a piece of land their mother owned.

Ex wants to sell his car to help his parents to pay it all off. I offered him to come over for a few days (I live in a different city) so he can try to relax and take his mind off of this but since his mother could be in danger he probably won't. I'm really worried about his mental health at this point.

I already told him to record if anything happens, I really hope his pos uncle fucks up and ends up in jail.

No. 433387

I got stomach cramps laughing at this

No. 433416

I have a historical sexual abuse case open and they need a statememt from my mother but she keeps fucking playing phone tag them. She has made arrangements with the officer I am working with twice and fucking didn't show up TWICE and now has a different number. I am so disappointed.

No. 433427

I feel like I'm wasting my life. Nothing can make me feel alive anymore.

No. 433442

Now I'm genuinely curious what song it is.

No. 433480

>have miscarriage
>constantly see baby stuff all over my email, amazon, pinterest, etc
>have to go to work anyway with all my coworkers questioning about my baby

No. 433491

I asked my bf what he wanted for his birthday and he said he wanted some 40 dollar basic ass pen. I got him the pen and now he's bitching that I asked him what he wanted and didn't know him well enough to get one on my own. The last time I got him a gift on my own he complained that it's too cheap.

No. 433492

File: 1562976317382.jpeg (863.63 KB, 906x936, 6C1490F2-C526-4313-9BC4-54954E…)

For fuck sakes, I can't get the song Pacman fever out of my head! Even when I'm having sex, all I can think about is pacman fever.

No. 433500


I been feeling very insecure and jealous since gaining weight. It been years since I felt confident in my own skin and it a struggle to keep from lashing out.

I join discord in an attempt to make friends and only to ruin it by getting jealous of the other girls. They brag about their youth and how "I can't gain weight" "I'm so smol" tee hee and it just make me want to scream. I have to leave the server for days before I am calm enough to come back.

I been going to gym, taking up new hobbies, playing new games, just to keep myself from being jealous of others. But it always come back. Being jealous and insecure is terrible. I can't even be happy for my friend for getting her first boyfriend. My first thought are always "I haven't had a boyfriend in 7 years?!" Wth? I go out of my way to be likeable and i get treated like a joke. It not fair!

I can't even vent on social media for ass pats. I make new accounts and my friends always find them. If I block them, I get called out. If I private them, no positive attention.

No. 433510

Earthquake happened earlier today and now I'm scared shitless. I keep worrying over when the next one is going to happen.

No. 433517

This girl I talk to always disappears after asking me how I'm doing, only to reply to me after hours if not the day after. I know she's busy but fuck it makes me feel like shit.

No. 433534

If it's really bad annon having a song stuck in your head for to long it can be classified as an illness (stuck song syndrome)

No. 433541

adding on to my vent. I know I suck at this game, but I hate how my gaming discord get some cliquey when it come to teaming up for a match. So many times I see people making a team after telling someone they don't feel like playing. It fucking two face as fuck. How do you expect people to get better? There only so much you can do solo. Everytime I see it happen, I want to fucking scream my lungs out. But it just a game and I shouldn't fucking care. But I do.

No. 433554

I can't get a fucking job, I've been unemployed for so long. My last job lasted 2.5 years and I finally quit because it was fucking abusive. I worked in a gas station kiosk at a huge chain grocery store (chafe way). We didn't get breaks. We could technically take sick days BUT since they would only schedule one person at a time (the gas station was open 16 hours a day and they would have 3 consecutive shifs one person each if that makes sense) and so they would make the person who was working before you work a double shift (again, with no breaks). Our salaries could never go above 11$ per hour (and I didn't even make that) plus we didn't get the same benefits as the cashiers who worked in the store (who made more than we did, and got breaks). And yet we were "union" and so I still got union fees taken out of my paycheck. There's a MILLION other reasons why I quit though.

My coworker quit (there were only four of us, now 3) I worked 6 days in a row for 7 weeks straight. I was in a college class at the time. I kept being told they couldn't find a new person to hire and they were SUPER hesitant to bring regular cashiers to the fuel station for some reason. And we were pressured to sell these stupid fucking bags of these nasty ass covered pretzels. I COULD NOT for the life of me sell these things, customers DID NOT want them (understandably), kept getting yelled at for not being able to sell them. My boss then threatened me "if you can't do your job, we'll find someone who will, and cut your hours". And I was like oh really???!?!!?!? I WISH A BITCH WOULD. I might actually get 2 days off a week then and work less than 45 hours!!!! God Forbid!!!!! And that's only scratching the surface of how shitty it was to work there. One of my coworks was an autistic manchild who I really want to go on a side tangent about but won't.

I live with my parents and my dad gave me a ton of shit for quitting, even though he knew all the reasons I quit, and didn't care. Failed the class I was in because of work, and was paying out of pocket for it. I've applied for 2 walmart locations, 2 costco locations, 9 starbucks locations, a local coffee shop, a ticket office at the performing arts center and other places I can't remember. None have called me back. And most places REQUIRE at least 3 references that aren't friends or family. I don't have any of those. And almost all jobs on craigslist require experience that I don't have. People in my life keep telling me to "just get a job". Well you know what it isn't that fucking easy, bitch I've TRIED and they shut up when I ask for suggestions. Working gives me SO MUCH anxiety but I'm still trying anyway.

My parents piss me off even more because they're extremely neglectful people and "homeschooled" me for religious reasons but didn't really school me at all beyond basic reading, writing and very basic math. Didn't make any effort to socialize me or make sure I had any remotely valuable skills or education/experience beyond religion. And now they just expect me to be a high functioning adult who can support myself. They really shouldn't have been allowed to have kids.

I can't get a college degree because I was rejected for student loans, plus I kept failing college classes and I think I might have an undiagnosed learning disability. Not to mention I have no fucking idea what I want to do. I keep thinking about how more and more jobs are becoming automated and it's making me really depressed.

I'm so fucking depressed and angry about all of this. I don't know how I will ever get a job again.

No. 433558

Anyone else tired of not knowing the future?

Not so much as an anxiety thing, but just being tired of having to wait so often for things to be revealed down the line?

Fuck, wish I could find out if I get the apartment, if I'm wasting my time trying to live a better life, if that person I REALLY like would ever like me back or just fucking talk to me if I tried

No. 433560

Are you a VA who does joke songs?
To my knowledge, the only songs that get memed are jokes to begin with, like making songs out of cringe posts online

No. 433564

I feel the exact same way and think about this a lot, not that there's anything to be done about it

No. 433572

Not a VA. My song isn't supposed to be a meme, but someone made a meme video out of it which caused its popularity to skyrocket. I guess I didn't actually explain why I'm annoyed. The person who made the meme video is someone I respect, because they're very talented. I really love their video. However, I keep seeing people repost the video and crop out the creator's watermark, then add some dumb caption to it. It frustrates me to no end seeing someone's work modified to remove their unobtrusive watermark. I would have no issue with people making new memes out of that video, so long as the original creator's watermark is kept in.

Another one of my songs was featured in another meme video, and the only place the song was uploaded in full on Youtube was on an artist's speedpaint video (I don't really upload my stuff to Youtube). I saw a comment on the video shitting on the artist because "this is the only video that features this song in full on Youtube". It legitimately frustrated me, I don't condone that shitty behaviour at all.

On my end, because of the popularity, people have reposted the song on websites that I already have the song uploaded to. Most people have removed the song when I asked them to, but there are a few that just ignore my messages. And I don't want to file a copyright claim because I'm not willing to give out my personal details to a website where my personal details might be forwarded on to the person I'm copyright claiming. It's hard to go into detail without giving up my identity, but everything I'm saying here is what happens to any remotely popular artist, I guess. Some people have absolutely no respect, it's super frustrating.

No. 433599

>expecting your gf to guess that you'd want an overpriced pen or she doesn't know you!!!
I mean… that's a hilarious self own. Pen guy.

No. 433606

i wish my boyfriend's taste in anime wasn't so bad. i love him so so dearly but he's talking about finally watching shield hero because "well it's different than the source material" when it's still misogynist garbage with hardcore slavery shit with underage girls.. it makes me so uncomfortable i almost wanna cry tbh. i'm heavily bothered by stuff like that for personal reasons and i don't get how it's enjoyable..

No. 433620

Update on this: I sent a long text to my mom (got updated number from my brother) about how I can't believe is avoiding and putting this off even though she KNOWS EVERYTHING. She knew it was happening! It was her bf, my eventual step-dad as a kid who caused this. I was pretty harsh in the text but didn't say anything mean or untrue. She hasn't repsonded to me but has been posting passive aggressive statuses about bullying on FB. I wash my hands of her. She was shit when I was a kid, she is shit now.

No. 433631

How is it like being in the music industry ? I feel like its dead

No. 433702

I'm starting to really struggle to deal with one of my housemates. She is easy to live with, and not a bad person at all, but I just find her personality hugely draining and annoying.
She doesn't seem to have any interests outside her appearance, so all she talks about is clothes,boys,her diet, the gym, skincare, etc and on top of it being hugely boring and shallow, I have finally just about managed to be okay with how I look (or at least I can deal with it and not think about it too much) and the constant body talk makes me really uncomfortable.

We just don't have like, a single thing in common and I'm tired of spending time with her, and now I'm getting the thing where you admit to yourself you find someone annoying, and suddenly everything they do is annoying.

We all have decided to live together for another year so I'm going to have to find a way to deal with her and not be a bitch, cause she hasn't actually done anything wrong, she's just not someone I'd choose to spend my time with.

No. 433711

Why are you spending time with her if you don't even like her? It's the same as a work colleague, you can just be nice enough to do what needs to be done with her and occasionally eat a meal together but you can spend your own time doing whatever you want. Go be with your own friends, if you don't want to talk to her let her know you're busy with something and slowly dissolve the social side of your relationship. You can say you don't want to talk about body stuff because of your issues, and offer alternative topics you know? Just don't be a jerk to her.
You played yourself by agreeing to live with her again and pretending to like her, you can only blame yourself.

No. 433713

Recommend him some Good anime like
>Parasyte the Maxim
>Gunsmith Cats

No. 433714

> "I don't talk to girls"
> yet follows a bunch of girls on Instagram

hm what's the truth..

No. 433715

My boyfriend cannot fucking stand that he has to get up early and go to work and that I "get the privilege" of staying home and cleaning the huge fucking mess he somehow makes in the few hours he's off work. I know he's pissed off because he told me in so many words that he wants me to get up and get started the second my eyes crack open at 5am when he's up, banging around getting ready to leave. So, because he wakes up at the ass crack of dawn, I should get up and start working immediately too? Why can't I just fucking start when I feel like? Even when I don't do anything until 10, it's ALWAYS done before he comes home and I still have enough time to cook dinner before he steps through the door. I wish I could get a job to escape this domestic hell. Also, apparently my specifications of clean aren't the same as his I guess because he still manages to find something to complain about, such as non-existent clutter.

No. 433717

He sounds like such a bitter bitch. Why should you suffer just because he does? He should either find a similarly-paying job with more flexible hours or days, or he can suck it up.
If he doesn't like the way you clean, he can hire a cleaner to solve all the non-existent problems and show you how it's done, or do it himself. Simple as.

No. 433719

Does Parasyte get better? I dropped it at like episode 8 because I stopped caring about the characters or what was happening.

No. 433773

It does not. It's samey all throughout until maybe the last third where it picks up… and drops everything immidiately.
I didn't like the characters myself, but I quite enjoyed the more mature feeling of a classic shounen story. I'm a sucker for those.
I don't get what's so particularly good about it too. It's a solid show with consistent quality and fairly consistent tension. It has a good balance of humour and drama. But I wouldn't say it's a masterpiece everyone is required to watch. If you're into darker while still very obviously shonen-type stories, it's great. But certainly not a must for every anime watcher.
It can be a moving coming of age story or "fragile balance between human and monster" story, but if you're not really into that, you can skip it.

Reiko is a goddess though.

No. 433790

Truth is you need to talk to him about it. Tell that nigga you're not gonna play any games

No. 433800

I could be considered a part of the "indie" industry I guess, which is very much still alive. I'm just a hobbyist though, so I don't consider myself an actual part of the industry, since this isn't my job and I don't want it to be.

No. 433805

I feel like all of the snark communities are so SJW ridden. It's like they want to play mean girl but have to be morally righteous too so it justifies their snarking. I just want to read about lolcows without hearing about how the posters are such better feminists than the people they are talking about.

No. 433841

Most anime is pointless and overhyped. If you don't like it drop it early no matter how much weebs hype it.

No. 433856

Oh, I try. He does like some good stuff, but then he also likes shit. He also gets frustrated in me disliking and uncomfortable.. It has slavery and is overall grossly misogynistic but "He later treats his basically-a-child slave better! he sees her as a human but she's still his slave"
Not to mention the main story plot is that the MC has a false rape claim and later gets his revenge on her by having her renamed "Whore", and in the novel, she's raped to death while people excitedly watch.

No. 433869

> It has slavery and is overall grossly misogynistic but "He later treats his basically-a-child slave better! he sees her as a human but she's still his slave"
Not to mention the main story plot is that the MC has a false rape claim and later gets his revenge on her by having her renamed "Whore", and in the novel, she's raped to death while people excitedly watch.
What the fuck, people who enjoy this shit are truly subhumans. Consider if you really want bf who watch this shit. Fucking respect yourself girl.

No. 433870

I've noticed this cognitive dissonance too. I mean, yeah you can shit on other women's looks, nitpick and make fun of them but that's not really very feminist, if that's what you like to spend your free time with- it's pretty much the opposite of that. So idk why those people claim to be feminists in the first place…maybe to feel better about themselves and things they say.

No. 433885

Eh, we're not together due to distance and other things, so it'd be a bit silly to bring it up. We do have feelings for each other (still I think/hope?). It's more of a vent arising from jealousy.

No. 433891

I’ve gained 15 lbs since I graduated last year, all fat since I don’t really exercise beyond work, and I was close to being underweight so everyone’s been congratulating me on my gain but I hate it so much. None of my shorts fit me anymore, and my ass is pretty much covered in cellulite. The main reason why I was underweight in high school was because I’d just sit in the library or bathroom during lunch and I pretty much only gained because I started eating lunch after graduation. I still want to exercise a little and save my ass lmao

No. 433895

Mb, thought u two were together. Damn that sucks ass anon but I know how it feels.

No. 433897

>spend the entire morning readying and cleaning just so the guy I'm interested in made up some BS excuse to flake by 1pm
>claims to be tired for running a few errands but that never seems to be an issue when it comes to playing MTG or doing something for his pals

Fuck men.
How dare I invite men over to a clean place to chill and swim in a pool and get fed. *What an exhausting choreeeeeeeeeeee~~~*
I'm pissed.

No. 433898

I gained a good amount of weight from excessive alcohol and food consumption and developed some cellulite on my legs and ass. I exercised and ate way less, lost the weight i gained, and the cellulite on both parts went away dramatically. In some angles and positions, it appears, but it when I'm standing it's barely discernible. I hope this helps you feel somewhat better lol. You can do it!

No. 433905

Wow this sounds exactly like my boyfriend its kinda creepy. Let's dump him.

No. 433995

I feel so disconnected with my boyfriend and inferior and I know it's ridiculous. I'm such a loser that I don't have any friends or family and he has plenty of friends /family so it makes me feel awful. I'm a little envious. I can't help but wonder why he's with me and I get a little upset that he probably bonds better with his friends than he does me simply because I'm a woman.

I feel like a weirdo. I hate myself.

No. 434041

File: 1563062295282.jpg (59.58 KB, 933x699, nootnoot.jpg)

We're not official but it still makes me mad. Happens with friends sometimes too and I just don't understand it. It would be one thing if I were trying to make everyone hang with me all the time, but these people are literally the ones approaching me with requests for plans and things.
I make sure to reserve the time and wipe my schedule for these people, and for what? So they can, on a whim, throw me like a piece of garbage when they find something better to do or are just "not in the mood."

I just don't have the patience. I'd rather people leave me alone completely than keep up this annoying ass pretense like they're my pals or care about me in a romantic way when they can't even be assed to come have fun and swim in a pool with me for an evening. Fuck me.

No. 434042

I tried to be understanding of my parents breaking into an open relationship, except I just found out my dad's girlfriend is my age.. I feel really sick. My dad is such a great person and means so much to me, that one fact is just making me.. eueugh.

No. 434043

Adding on, my mom says she isn't bothered by it but I've noticed her smoking and drinking more. Shit sucks

No. 434045

Yeah she's definitely bothered by it even if she's not letting on. That's really rough anon and I'm sorry. My stepdad cheated on my mom not too long ago and what hurt most is that the girl he saw was three years older than me, and of course she was just using him in the end. Men are so dumb, as if they have anything in common with someone 25+ years their junior.

No. 434050

I'm honestly really worried about her too, our family dog who was basically her best friend died recently. I just wish I could do more for her.. I'm just hopeful she doesn't slip back into cutting. She means the world to me, I adore my dad too but, yeah. Its overall such an uncomfortable situation, I've never even met or seen his new girlfriend, all of it makes the time I spend at home really.. uneasy.

No. 434055

Why the fuck should anyone have to be 'understanding' of that? It's disgusting and disrespectful, no daughter or wife would be okay with it.

You should confront him. It doesn't matter how great he is to you when he's treating your mother like trash and being a nasty pervert.

No. 434059

Wtf? I'm so sorry anon. Your mom should get on tinder and flirt w fit big dick college boys then, see how your dad likes it

No. 434061

I wouldn't give them a second chance unless they initiate AND host. Also any guy who is whiney and tired after a day of errands or chores is inferior anyways, personally after I get my shit done I get a second wind by evening and wanna see my boyfriend who has enough energy for 1am MtG nights but no time for me after work at like 5pm, not even for nice dinner or snacking and tv reeeEE

noot freaking noot

No. 434064

I don't get why feminists say women shouldn't talk shit about other women, I'm over this women unite bs. If women can do whatever they want to I think it's ok to bash whoever they want to too.

No. 434068

I’m a radfem and I’m all for sisterhood but sometimes I just wanna be petty dammit

No. 434073

File: 1563068030706.jpg (146.2 KB, 770x1001, hohum.jpg)

Several months are taken off of my life expectancy every time a farmer makes a "My bf uses porn/cheats/treats me like shit. Thoughts?" post, and we get two or three-a-day around these parts.
Like, I get that they want to vent, but what kind of response are they expecting?
You know what you have to do. Dump him. Cut his bepis off, Karen. It's not even worth replying with "dump him" because you know they aren't going to, they're just gonna keep letting their fucking doughy, ugly, limp-dick, pornsick boyfriends fart on their couches all day.
I still want to shout "dump him" from the mountaintops, though.

No. 434101

Or when they enable very obvious fuckbois because they have ~chemistry~ with them. Tired of seeing "this guy negged the fuck out of me and said he wasn't 'ready for a relationship' and he hasn't messaged me since i let him fuck me, BUT WE CONNECTED!!!!!" You bitches need to love yourself just a little.

No. 434113

>friend starts a discord
>not about it but join to be nice
>some 4chan tranny is in it and is a complete attention whore in vc
>gets unironically seethed when real women start talking
>upset about our voices being feminine and mocks how we talk
>calls us real women "trannies" to be lol so quirky and funny except it's really not
Oh my goodness.

No. 434126

why are trannies so fucking attention whores, ive never met one that didn't immediately try to dominate a conversation.

No. 434136

My boyfriends brother is doing some not so subtle ways of flirting with me… in front of my boyfriend. What makes this more cringier is that he is 37 and I am only just 20, despite the older brother constantly dating older women and him proudly proclaiming he only dates Milfs. Which makes it more hard for me to understand.

Me and my boyfriend agree that he is only doing this because he completely disrespects his little brother and probably has some thing for cucking him for whatever reason. This shit is embarrassing…

No. 434140

My boyfriends best friend keeps messaging me for no reason when he is drunk and i dont understand why because i am pretty sure he doesn't even like me as a friend. Kinda feel weird and I wish he wouldnt

No. 434141

That's fucking depressing. Why are men such useless pigs? No, scratch that. That's insulting to pigs.

Stories like this are why I don't trust men and don't want to get married.

If I were you I would cut off all communication with your dad and tell him you'll only talk to him again if he is faithful to your mom again. At the very least I hope your mom divorces him and takes all his money and valuable assets.

Probably because they know that that's what 90% of men are like and the men who aren't like that are very rare and almost always taken but they still don't want to be alone.

No. 434145

jesus, is speaking in a female voice transphobia now?

No. 434147

I agree with this. Also open relationships are for people who want to be single with a backup. He should just divorce like a normal midlife crisis dude. It's not appropriate in a family home.

No. 434148

It's most likely some pedophile from r9cute. Find some dirt on it and get it expelled

No. 434155

I find that "open relationship" 99% of the time means "guy who goes around fucking random women, woman doesn't have sex with anyone else and is in obvious denial and pain but puts up with it for some reason"

No. 434162

People who can only see the negative side of everything it’s mentally exhausting for me.

No. 434179

File: 1563107631274.jpg (79.63 KB, 480x480, 053853853.jpg)

I'm pretty sad about TiMs and male shitposters shitting up Crystal Cafe.
I used to kind of like it as a more laid-back, sweet alternative to Lolcow, but honestly? I think I prefer Lolcow's general saltiness, disdain for any excessive foolishness, and the way mods ruthlessly bring down the hammer on anything that smells even vaguely of inceloid trash, since that's apparently the only truly effective way to create a free space for women.
I'd rather talk here and get comforted (or called an idiot bitch) by a majority of other actual women, than get worthless replies from some unhinged male who believes women need to hear his input by force. There's a very good reason we're not making "Femanon General" threads on /r9k/ and hanging out in them, so why do they feel the need to try and make any imageboard with even a whiff of female users into their personal dumping ground?

The peak of a high-tech, self-censoring, data-collecting dystopian internet can't come soon enough. I can't wait until there's an app that automatically detects the gender of anyone you interact with online, and allows you to block their posts from your sight in advance if you just don't feel like reading any scrote garbage on a particular day. I'm just so tired of it all.

No. 434180

Oh damn, you sound pretty upset… did they do something or are you just pissed that they, as usual, have to invade every single female space?
I totally feel you, though. Being ruthless is the only effective way to keep them out.

No. 434182

Nah, it just sucked going back there after a while and noticing how the place has changed from a comfy atmosphere to like three bait threads, the odd tranny and painfully obvious males yelling at girls/women for sharing opinions they didn't like. Felt like seeing your nice treehouse infested with roaches and covered in bird shit or something (Sorry for deleting my post, I used the wrong image.)

No. 434195

Picture dumps can be done by anyone, gender doesn't really matter in that case
Just ask for something and you can receive it

No. 434201

>I can't wait until there's an app that automatically detects the gender of anyone you interact with online

As if such app could exist in a world of acceptance for oversensitive trannies.

No. 434204

File: 1563115676555.gif (480.73 KB, 499x315, oh_well.gif)

I'm pretty sure I've already seen some of them get offended by that AI that can accurately guess your sex and age.

No. 434214

File: 1563118639773.jpg (41.15 KB, 720x960, 23578679834.jpg)

I'm so fucking mad that every time you think you've found a platonic male friend you're having a good time with he either hits on you and/or suddenly drops you like a hot fucking potato when he starts dating a girl. Why does this fucking meme exist, I hate losing male friends to this and this dumb bitch ends up being hopeful despite it happening literally every time. Every time. I wish I had a close brother so I could have one male friend to keep me from 100% pinkpilling and believing that men have some small redeeming qualities and aren't all inhumane garbage.

No. 434215

It's super annoying. I can tell whenever this tranny will be in the vc it's going to be centered around him sperging about something or insulting others. For some reason the friend who created the discord thinks this is highly entertaining, I find it obnoxious and unfunny. It's really hard to have a conversation or get to know any of the other members because everything is constantly redirected towards the awful shit tranny says.
Sometimes my friend mutes the tranny on purpose just to get him riled up, so when he gets unmuted he unleashes a verbal tirade that's apparently oh so hilarious.

No. 434216

Just "jokingly" bully the shit out of him until he goes into a hilarious narcissistic rage and either shuts up or leaves the chat whenever you're around. Your friend being owner (or mod) gives you a bit of immunity if you're close to them, doubly so if you can sweet-talk them into giving you mod powers yourself.
If the tranny complains, just fake-apologize, but make sure the constant subtext is that he needs to chill out and stop being so sensitive all the time.

No. 434217

I have a few male friends I've known for years, but I've accepted that we won't be as close as they get girlfriends and wives.
A few of them I only talk to maybe a few times a year but it's not like it makes them my enemies or that I've lost them.
Try not to take it personally because it's really nothing to do with your character or how they see you. If you were getting married to a man, wouldn't it feel a little inappropriate if he had a slew of female besties that he kept on a pedestal and told everything to?

No. 434224

I'm the anon you replied to and there's a difference between "keeping on a pedestal and telling everything to" and "being on speaking terms and casually cordial with". The end result is usually in the field of "never contacting again and leaving every message on read and being ice cold to at social gatherings". I get that people get insecure when their SOs have friends of the opposite gender but men drop contact because a woman they don't need to fuck is worthless to them, not out of respect for their girlfriends/wives.

No. 434225

I see. They don't sound like good friends, consider it a bullet dodged then.

No. 434243

I don’t know what disgusts me more

The fact that my SO raped me
or the fact that my self-sabotaging dumbass has stayed with him for 6 years and now we have two kids together.
So now I feel trapped and I flip flop between loving and adoring him, unable to imagine life alone, and fantasising about not having him in my life anymore because I just want to cry and cry over what’s he’s done to me.

I don’t want advice or pity or even a reply to this, I just needed to admit it to someone because I feel so guilty for hating him for even a moment. Just need to admit my regret.

No. 434253

Today's one of those days where you already know it was gonna be shit because you felt like shit, but on top of that everyone somehow, whether knowingly or unknowingly, makes things progressively worse for you as the day goes by, or just…random things happen all at once, as if that day is somehow predetermined to fuck you up and suck every bit out of that little bit of life in you that's left.

No. 434261

Some time ago I came across anon here saying something like
> have you consider you're not romantically interested in women because lesbian romance is only ever depicted through the male gaze?
Bitch it has been keeping me awake at night ever since…
I long accepted that I was that bi slut archetype. Who doesn't want to get into romantic relationship with women bc I'm needy and mentally ill. I'm scared that women would demand from me even more emotional labor than men and I won't be able to meet their needs and I can't handle letting my partner down or being a burden to them…(peep the mommy issue and internalized misogyny lmao). I'm absolutely turned off by the U-Haul stereotype…
At least with men (in my xp), as long as you fuck them and stroke their ego from time to time, they'll put up with your shit.
It really reinforces my aversion that all the women with whom I have had intimate relationships are unstable and lots of time emotional vampires as well. Trash attracts trash I guess.
I literally don't know what a healthy wlw relationship looks like and I'm v troubled by it. I feel like I'll never be good enough to be in a loving monogamous lesbian relationship.

No. 434264

File: 1563128039471.png (Spoiler Image, 867.8 KB, 1956x956, f24.png)

I mean, holy fuck. This is how comfortable they've become on CC. How could it have fallen so far? What the fuck happened??

No. 434265

Ime whether it's a boy or a girl as soon as they break up with their SOs they come back running to friends they cast aside for 'support'. I feel like telling them to fuck off every time.

No. 434268

>reply start off with "girl"

No. 434269

I've been watching that HBO show called Euphoria and there's a trannie in it, almost made me forget how physically ill I get from seeing their absolutely disgusting bodies

No. 434270

Absolutely disgusting

No. 434285

>post op
Lmao but I thought transition would solve allll of their problems? It’s hilarious that I have never witnessed a post op tranny who’s not STILL cripplingly depressed and bitter, in fact, they’re even more prone to meltdown because they realize no one wants their butchered franken bodies

No. 434299

Come on. This was obviously a troll post.

No. 434303

Decided I would meet up with someone from Tinder. So I invited him over to swim in the complex's pool with me. He suggested grilling so he said he was stopping at the grocery store to get stuff for burgers.

He got here early and walked up the stairs. I answered the door and I was friendly. Specifically I pointed out my stepdad who was on the patio. I noticed he had no stuff to make burgers with and I asked him if he needed to go get them from his vehicle. I thought it was odd of him to leave groceries in a vehicle when it was 90 degrees outside. He said yeah and left, so I went back to some chores.
After five minutes I thought it was odd he hadn't returned. I texted him if he needed help. No response. After ten minutes I called and it went to his voicemail.
I noticed on Tinder he unmatched me.

I think I just got rudely ghosted.
My stepdad says to forget it because clearly he's an asshole. I just feel so ugly and fat?
I don't feel like I catfish.
I'm honestly so perplexed, even if this Keebler elf motherfucker thought I was repulsive he could have just been platonic since I said as much before meeting.
I don't think I've ever been treated so rudely before and I'm a bit shocked…

No. 434323

From what you wrote, it looks like he was expecting to have sex, and seeing your stepdad there and your question about burger stuff made him realize you seriously just wanted to grill burgers, so he ghosted.

No. 434325

Word. Out of all my girlfriends only one has been emotionally stable and after a mutual breaking up she ended up with an emotionally high maintenance possessive psycho bitch who destroyed her. I'm a bislut too and even though I love the fuck out of women I can't date them anymore because it seems the WLW scene is a mine field of mental issues and unstable people. I hate it.

The U-haul streotype (I love that term because it's too accurate) is a huge turn off to me too but it always seems like WLWs are always looking for massive amounts of emotional labor and commitment instead of casual dating and FWB sex. I recognize it's just because of how women are socialized from birth though (fooling around is a no-no for a fine lady!) and a lot of lesbians/bi women are traumatized by their upbringing as a gay teen and because the LGBT scene just seems to encourage drama whoring but it still pisses me off. I wish straight girls would date me, I'm extra pissed off by shitty men who don't treat their girlfriends right because they have the privilege of actually dating a stable girl.

No. 434327

He said something slightly shallow before we met up. When I suggested the pool he joked about being shy about his dad bod so I jested back that it would compliment my mom bod. He replied in no uncertain terms woah, woah, woah he wasn't looking to hook up with an actual fat chick. So I sent him a full body pic and frankly told him to decide if I was anyone worth the pursuit. He backpedaled and prattled about me not being fat and gave a bunch of heart faces and such.

Maybe my pictures just don't convey my candid appearance that well, even so, I just find the whole ordeal very rude. He's just a below average guy who thinks he deserves a model and acts like a cunt to women who don't please him.

No. 434331

I think he freaked when he saw your stepdad and realized he wasn't gonna bang you and was embarrassed about not having the burgers

No. 434332

Who invites a first date to grilling with your parents?
You are out of touch, it's so absurd he probably didn't think you were serious. IDK, if I were him I'd totally bail as well.

No. 434336

It was a nice day for pool and grill and I live with my stepdad.
Would you have at least let the other person know you suddenly were not comfortable before bailing? I mean, I would have.

Gee, I guess.

No. 434340

A friend’s friend’s ex was the victim of a really serious crime overnight. I never met this girl but the whole thing is so fucked up and I don’t think there’s anything I can do or say or be comforting or helpful right now.

No. 434342

What happened

No. 434345

you soung legitimately autistic, did you wanna just hang out w him or did you wanna fuck?

No. 434346

Can you post someone‘s body that looks similar to yours? Also his behavior was bizarre sorry that happened

No. 434348

Is it so autistic to actually have a chill day with someone and decide if there's any long term chemistry before having sex? No, we weren't talking like this was a hookup at all. I legitimately had no reason to believe this guy wasn't serious about grilling and having a day at the pool. Before he got here he even gave the reason for being early as having left the grocery store too soon. If he just wanted to fuck me it would have been pretty strange to hear him talk that lie down.

No. 434349

File: 1563140800583.jpg (22.81 KB, 622x464, hank.jpg)

Wow, lots to consider here.
>unironic use of the troon-term WLW
>I'm needy (but DAE sick of these needy lesbos?)
>un-ironic preference for shallow relationships with scrotes because women be complicated amirite
>get your u-haul the fuck away from me, I want casual sex but also monogamy and commitment but not that much
and the cherry on top
>a dead-serious insinuation that the "WLW" dating scene is full of crazy bitches, compared to the straight dating scene which is full of well-adjusted men who aren't crazy at all, no sir
I know you guys are just venting, but you couldn't sound like more stereotypical flakey bihets if you tried.

No. 434350

I don't know why some anons are calling you clueless and autistic, I don't think inviting him for a grill was weird. I'm a Eurofag so it might be a cultural difference though.
Yeah, it does sound like the guy was just expecting a quick lay and not actually getting to know a girl.

On the plus side, at least you didn't waste much time with him!

No. 434351

Of course I wouldn't say anything, that would be extremely uncomfortable.
My point is that you probably shouldn't use tinder if you are this sensitive and naive, while some people are may be looking for a relationship and stuff, the vast majority won't care about you and your feelings and maybe even take advantage of you.

No. 434352

>>434348 i do find inviting a tinder dude to hangout while your parent is at home kinda autistic, yes.

No. 434353

>at least you didn't waste much time with him
Thanks anon, this is what I say too. This one was just particularly jarring and weird.

No. 434356

If it was grilling with your friends I'd totally get it. But at home with a stepparent? Definitely weird.

No. 434357

I think you're right in that I don't understand current dating culture where this level of cowardice is acceptable. You may have a point that Tinder isn't for me despite being honest and stating what I want upfront. Seems like men on there are sociopaths.

I don't get it. But considering what other anons said about him just wanting to fuck and me being naive, I'm kind of glad my stepdad was home.

No. 434359

Discord is boring and all the people in each server never properly talk to each other unless they're moderators and already know each other. Awful for finding new people to talk to.

No. 434364

>Not addressing any of the points raised and instead is just ad-homineming it to hell because reeee nasty bihets!!!
If we're playing this game, you couldn't sound like more of a stereotypical angry lesbian going off the tangent any time someone has a problem with the scene. The U-haul stereotype wouldn't be a stereotype if it wasn't based on some amount of truth.

No. 434369

I joined discord recently and I agree. A lot of groups I've joined say that you can't just message people directly either. So idk. I just wanna speak to people too

No. 434372

Like you can't ping people or dm them? I see a lot of no pinging but I've yet to see servers say you can't dm. Dming is pretty personal. Either way, Discord is definitely cliquey.

No. 434373

Literally never had this problem with any Discord server I've joined but then again I actually join the conversation and bring in something to discuss instead of waiting for someone to notice me. Any group is bound to have a core block that interacts with each other way more than others, but do you think people get in by never partaking in the conversation? No, they've been active for some time and bonded with the other people because of that. Discord servers aren't really for people who expect to have a message board instead of an interactive real-time discussion.

I'm glad that Discord servers exist because back when I was a teen chat rooms and irc channels were popular, you just picked a channel and joined it, met new people and after a few months you had integrated into the group. People have been so pampered by Facebook groups for the past 10 years so that they expect a slow-moving discussion they can jump back in the next day or start a thread and get reactions as they please.

No. 434380

My parents blame me for being raped and abused by my ex and then wonder why I don't want to fuck with them.

No. 434382

File: 1563142827734.jpeg (103.22 KB, 628x747, angrybihetsama.jpeg)

There's the homophobia I knew was bubbling just beneath the bihet surface! I'm not even a lesbian, just feel sorry for lesbians having to deal with allegedly "bisexual" women who don't take them seriously as partners whatsoever.

No. 434387

I already had to leave 2 servers, because despite me being there since they started and basically texting with them every day, I still never managed to get into the "friend group".
I wonder if it's because I wasn't enough of a queer special snowflake or whether I'm an asshole (or autistic) lol

No. 434427

idk im in niche groups. how do i find good discord groups

No. 434447

I really want to join a cosplay discord group. There isn't a lot of local cosplayers who ENJOY the craft of cosplay. Everyone would rather buy or mod, which is fine. But I want to be part of the build.

No. 434457

I have trouble finding good servers and that's a major problem. A lot of the servers I see have special snowflakes begging for attention and Tumblr shit everywhere. Finding people you can get on with when these are the norm online is already challenging in itself. It's not even close to comparable with 90s and early 2000s chat rooms where people didn't try so hard to be the most special and noticed.

No. 434521


that’s horrible, anon, i’m so sorry.

No. 434526

>unironic use of the troon-term WLW
did you know that troons didn't invent nor did they monopolize these terms? tf
>I'm needy (but DAE sick of these needy lesbos?)
>un-ironic preference for shallow relationships with scrotes because women be complicated amirite
way to misrepresent what I said, asshole. I AM needy and because of that I have insecurity about my ability to be a place of stability for other women… Not that I think all women are dramatic unstable bitches. I just have the misfortune to run into those types.
>>get your u-haul the fuck away from me, I want casual sex but also monogamy and commitment but not that much
God forbid I don't want to move in with someone immediately after sexing them?? Monogamous relationship IS what I want but they seem to move way too fucking fast with women and I'm put off by that (intimacy issue). Burn me the stake for being a bad gay.

No. 434533

Spiderverse makes me wish i had a good dad.

No. 434582

>lose 40 lbs
>thought I'd be happy at this weight
>objectively healthiest body I've had since middle school (lighter and with more muscle)
>still fucking hate my body, picture myself in my head as old weight no matter what
Free me.

No. 434595

My boyfriend is extremely upset to me to the point of not wanting to talk to me because after a long winded tweet I jokingly ended it with "begone heteros", referring to pornsick and weird people who are 99% heterosexual and shit, people obsessed with ecchi and hentai anime. I legitimately don't see the problem in it.

No. 434599

He is probably a pornsick weirdo taking it personally but as a woman with a bf what are you doing tweeting about 'the heteros' like you aren't one for all intents and purposes

No. 434600

You beat me anon, I was going to post the same. The hypocrisy is too much kek

I bet your bf is into some of the shit you just mentioned, probably all of them.

No. 434660

same, anon. I hope it gets better someday.

No. 434664

File: 1563170687586.jpeg (56.11 KB, 750x917, wciwkzuulca31.jpeg)

Why is reddit so often the embodiment of a guillible 30 year old man? Why do they believe this shit is real? I'm just amazed at this point. Does anyone even use kik anymore?

No. 434675

being groomed by an older man has left me eternally fucked in the head. i feel like i'm frozen in time and have the heart of a child. i'm a fully functioning adult with a job, i go to school, but i'm still afraid of the dark and cry when i have nightmares. i miss being coddled and told everything is going to be okay. i talk to stuffed animals to stay sane and pretend i'm not as lonely as i am. tonight is especially bad and every time i get this feeling i want to run back to him because i know he'll take me and do everything i wish he would, he'd tell me i'm safe and loved and nothing bad will ever happen

i'm medicated i'm in therapy but i love him but i hate him and i hate myself for being raised to love an actual pedophile i'm terrified i have nobody to talk to and i just want to end it i'm so fucking scared and ashamed

No. 434677

Hey anon I know it's shit and it hurts a lot that men are coddled into getting away with feeling like they're owed our bodies even as children, but please don't let him win. I know you're tired and I know it's so fucking unfair, because we were kids and we didn't get to decide what happened to us, but a tiny part of you keeps going despite him to have gotten you this far. There is a light that never goes out. And that's not just me admitting to still being afraid of the dark too. Somehow we got here and that's the important thing, don't discount how you did it. Pretend I'm you, if you like. You'd probably never tell me to end it. We're always much kinder to others than we are to ourselves.

I'm so sorry. I know it hurts. I'd hug you if I could.

No. 434678

I wish I could just sleep for one night without having stressful or downright disturbing dreams. I have to work at 4 am, woke up at 2:45 and tried to go to bed at 8 but couldn’t fall asleep and when I did I had dreams of a girl I vaguely knew from college getting in a gory accident in front of me, dreams about work where I’ve messed everything up and get yelled at/fired, and “fantasy dreams” usually involving having to react to someone near me that I don’t actually know irl dying. I dread going to sleep because I wake up feeling creeped out and upset and it puts a huge damper on the beginning of my day.

No. 434679

My husband keeps picking fights with me, talking down to me, and avoids intimacy. Each time I ask him whats wrong or why he's being an ass he tells me nothing and that he still loves me. I hate being gaslighted, something is WRONG and its you treating me like shit asshole.

No. 434685

One of my friends that i’ve known for a few years now and lives in a different country from me is being stalked by their ex big time the dude will literally order pizza to her house daily and that’s kind of harmless but he also sends her texts on every social media and has threatened her with violence saying how he’s going to kill her if she doesn’t kill her self, etc. This has been going on for like a year or so and she’s even gone to the cops several times and they refuse to do anything since they can’t prove it’s really him ( he makes throwaway accounts and numbers to harass her ) but i have a really bad feeling and i’m just very worried for her safety and he’s escalated to sending her gore of mutilated women and saying how that’s how she’ll end up and also threatening her family, she’s had to change her number and instagram and everything and he still finds ways to harass her. I wish there was something I could do but she’s miles away in a different country, but i’m seriously concerned for her safety.

No. 434689

What is it with the whole sending pizzas to your house thing? It happened to me 5 times in one day like 3 years ago but I have no idea who it was. I had posted a few times to 4chan and maybe found my address by tracing my ip?

No. 434690

I wish someone would send pizza to my house for free

No. 434691

they weren't paid for…its a stupid prank and not even funny since I neither ended up paying for it or eating it

No. 434697

It's been a common asshole thing to do for as long as I recall. I just thought most pizza places these days were smarter and demand a form of payment upfront when the order is placed. Although I guess if someone claims they're paying with cash.

No. 434711

In 2 weeks I will write my final exam and as somebody who's already anxious on a normal basis, I'm of course super scared about it.
Now my mother told me that they plan to go to vacation the days before and the day of my exam, asking me if I'd prefer them not going.
I told her that I of course can't and don't want to stop them, but that I would prefer not having to be alone the evening before since I'm likely a crying mess.
Now my mother said they won't go, but she's also pissed at me. I told her that I don't want her to be angry at me, that they should go if she wants that so much, because now I feel guilty over having ruined their vacation and I can't exactly concentrate on studying when she's angry at me. But then she told me that I always say everything is her fault and that I always try to guilttrip her? But, I am the one feeling guilty right now? Why ask for my opinion if you only accept one answer?

She constantly does this, being angry at me, never relenting no matter how often I apologize and always making herself out to be the grand victim who sacrifices things for my sake - even if I never asked for any of that in the first place.
I'm not some type of master manipulator, I only said how I honestly feel about it.
Now she's super angry, going around slamming doors. What should I do?

No. 434737

I dont know why but the thread image of Bob Ross makes me want to cry.

No. 434740

Ever since I got my IUD last October I‘ve gained like 10kg. I just wanna kill myself, I feel so fat. I used to be 55kg and felt already chubby and now I’m at like 66– 68kg (don’t own a scale) and I have never felt this uncomfortable before. As soon as my apartment has hot water again, I’ll start doing home workouts again. I also have to figure out a meal plan…

No. 434764

I am fucking dreading my graduation. It should really be of the best days of my life, as I'm graduating from one of the top law schools in my country with a great mark. But it'll be fucking awful. My parents have public meltdowns whenever we go put together, which normally involves starting fights over nothing. If someone looks at them the wrong way, they'll just start swearing and yelling. It's humiliating. Everyone stops and stares. My parents will also take awful photos of me (like shooting under my chin) and when I ask them to shoot at a better angle they always just go off on how they can't take a good photo of me because I'm fat and ugly. I'm tempted to just bring a tripod, as I can easily take nice photos of me. But then my parents will kick off at that too? They've already told me that they are not proud of me. Its just going to be awful and another reminder of how I'm never good enough for them.

No. 434780

big congrats on your graduation, anon! im sure you'll make an amazing lawyer/whatever other job law school qualifies you for.

is there a chance you can trick your parents into not going? i mean, they already suck and have apparently told you, verbally, that they're not proud of you (wtf), so maybe they wont be mad if they miss it? tell them they changed the date or sth and go to graduation alone on the day of. it sucks being alone on such a big day but by the sound of your parents you're better off alone.

even if they have a narc meltdown about how its UR FAULT WE MISSED IT BC YOURE TOO STUPID TO EVEN TELL US THE DATE RIGHT maybe its a better shot putting up with a private narc rage than a public one in front of your teachers, classmates & their families

No. 434785

>>434780 There's no way they would miss it. They're the kinda parents who want to go in order to ruin it for me? It's like this whenever I achieve something (like results day/college acceptance) They take great pleasure in ruining shit. I might just get super high in order to be able to deal with them.

No. 434804

File: 1563200137402.jpg (150.71 KB, 1130x1300, grumpy-old-man-19577484.jpg)

I'm tired of living in the arctic circle with its dumbass weather.
The people are lovely, the country is great otherwise, but fuck this weather. Summer lasts for 3 months but it rains half the time anyway, spring lasts for a week and everything blooms and then dies as soon as you look away, nothing fucking grows here and if it does it tastes like styrofoam. Tomatoes taste like nothing, shops sell watery milk, chicken looks like it's been injected with saline to make it heavier. Berries are the only thing worth buying or picking here and you can do that in 2 measly 2-week windows after which they disappear from the shelves or there's like 2 boxes of rotten fruit left. Then as soon as it came, summer is gone, giving way to a week of nice autumn, then 9 months of misery, snow, sleet, ice, everything looking straight up like downtown Chernobyl. Fuck off.

No. 434808

Sever anon. Fuck those people. Lie about the date and time and never talk to those pieces of shit again.
Do you think campus/school security could help keep them out? That's a stretch but idk much about graduation/event security procedures lol

Congratulations on all your hard work and achievements! You'll go far in life and how exciting to continue the ascent! Godspeed

No. 434828

I hope you go to the doctor! At worst your doc will just be like "lol it's nothing" and at best they'll give you something to help deal with it better/stop an infection before it gets really bad!

No. 434879

I'm turning 30 and my life has literally no purpose. I'm one of those people who shouldn't have been born. I have literally no worth and I'm 100% expendable, if I died tomorrow only my parents would miss me. I hate all those "you're beautiful and valid!!! uwu" posts because my brain always sees the big red "does not apply to you" remark on top of it. I don't bring any value to anyone, I'm a burden to everyone around me. I'm awkward and annoying, I talk too much and never have anything interesting to contribute. I don't blame people for not wanting me around. I would despise myself too, except I don't think people outright hate me, I just don't matter to anyone.

I'm not suicidal and don't want to kill myself, I'm not bitter towards people (only myself), I'm just extremely apathetic towards my own existence. I've become a recluse because I got tired of being the one always contacting other people and being left on read. If someone contacts me, it's only because they want to get something out of me. What a worthless life I'm living.

No. 434884

Sorry, anon. Sounds real shit. I know I couldn't survive somewhere like that. As much as I hate the culture of racism, homophobia, and bible thumping where I'm from, the food is fucking bomb and I enjoy having 7-8 months of summer. In fact, what cold we do get is almost too much for my body to deal with. Can't imagine if I lived in your part of the world.

No. 434894

Which country

No. 434902

File: 1563213400147.jpeg (Spoiler Image, 1.45 MB, 4032x3024, D5930CA9-1243-4B33-B74B-6F32B8…)

My ex is a piece of shit, def don’t get why I tried to be friends with her
Invited me to stay at her place but has phone sex loudly both mornings I was there. Then lied to my face when I confronted her to like tone it down because I could hear.
Her house is a disgusting mess and I honestly don’t understand how she could live in it.
I should have just stayed in the hotel like I was planning too.
She also has her own discord and let’s underage kids post porn and doesn’t see an issue with it because if they get in trouble it’s their own fault
She lies about being Japanese when she’s actually Hispanic and even changed her name legally to a Japanese one
Lies to everyone around her and will never stop
She’s gross and I’m sooooooo sad I gave almost 10 years of my life to a disgusting piece of shit
Spoilered the image of her fucking freezer door

No. 434904

I'm going to turn 30 next year and feel similar to you. In cases like these I think a good ol' nihilist pill is very much needed. There are so many people that aren't useful to the society and that don't contribute in any way. Maybe just try to enjoy your ride while you're alive? I have nothing to live for but I don't have anything to die for either. I just think life on Earth is too short to have a mindset like that. It's easier said than done, I know, but try to be less hard on yourself.

No. 434922

This but not even my parents would miss me.

No. 434944

hey, i just wanted to know that your reply helped me through a really rough night. it breaks my heart knowing this happened to you and so many other girls but knowing we share similar feelings made me feel less ashamed. thank you for being so kind

No. 434948

Stop being a sad faggot and train your body and get some skills.
Learn how to grow your own food, build your own shelter, defend yourself with weapons and the body.
Learn about the local flora and fauna around you to see what you can do with it.
If you're going to live for yourself you need to refine your body and mind. Challenge yourself physically.

No. 435004

Does anyone else like themselves but feel like they're worthless because of the way other people treat you?

I have this problem where I feel like I do have certain qualities and talents to offer others. Yet I feel shut down, taken advantage of, disrespected, and treated indifferently by others a lot.
It's like people see that there's something to get out of me, but the second I have nothing or ask anything in return, I'm treated like no one special and disposable.
It's like this with my parents. My friends. Love interests. Sometimes strangers–although I find strangers these days to actually be way more polite and respectful for the fact that they don't know me.

For the longest time I thought it was because I was an unattractive woman with a bitch aura, but I think there's just something innate in my personality that attracts these types of uncaring people. I might be too servile and passive in many aspects.
Then again, I'm not a doormat. Yet I also know that when I get justifiably upset at the way people treat me they reverse victim and flake me anyway. Sometimes I let people get away with bad treatment towards me just because I know if I cut them off then I'll really be alone. I'd rather put up with mistreatment and abuse than deal with my loneliness sometimes. Not that I hate my alone time, but companionship is just an important need of mine. As is a sense of acceptance and belonging.
All I feel lately is rejection and I'm not sure if it's normal. Late 20s here btw.

No. 435050

I can't deal with my OCD anymore. I always need to be obsessed with something, someone or an idea. This is getting very tiring. I'm also developing paranoia thanks to those obsessive thoughts. I have an existential crisis almost everyday. My mind just won't shut up. I feel miserable. I just want peace. That's all I'm asking for. I have tried almost everything but nothing seems to work. I don't know for how long I'll keep fighting this battle. It's getting too exhausting.

No. 435056

I start med school on the 13th and can't miss a day the first week, otherwise I get dropped… and I just got a summons for jury duty… ON THE 13TH


No. 435066

File: 1563235908289.jpg (128.69 KB, 1280x738, MV5BOWU0NjNmNDItZjA3OC00YmM0LT…)

if you're in the US, you can postpone your jury duty. read the entire summons and there should be information regarding postponing somewhere on there, sometimes there's a perforated bit they want you to fill out and mail back, but there should at least be a phone number or instructions or something.

No. 435069

I went to their website and submitted a date I can appear, but I won't know if it got approved for two days, and the date I requested is next week. I'm wondering if that's too soon, but the entire week of, and before my summons, I have dentist, therapist, and doctor's appointment, as well as piano lessons and a sports team I just signed up for and can't miss. I can't move any of the appointments because they were made months ago and they'll be rescheduled months out. Why can't jury piss off; my city is ultra left wing and they let the criminal go most of the time. Some guy exposing his junk was let go, and wound up in prison two weeks later because he did it again. Just, urgh.

No. 435076

File: 1563237884813.jpg (298.76 KB, 1920x1080, Shootme.jpg)

Being on this site has made me so self-conscious of my laugh lines. I know the whole "nasolabial folds" thing is sorta a meme and dumb nitpicking but I can't help checking for them in the mirror every morning. Mine are barely there but I still looked up anti-laugh line creams even though I'm only 21. Being insecure about aging sucks.

No. 435079

Does anyone on here even mention them anymore? I thought that meme died a while back. Anyway everyone has them, it’s just you only notice on yourself staring in the mirror or on close-ups/stills of internet personas getting nitpicked.

No. 435086

My bf is quite bad at holding a conversation. He really doesn't have an opinion on much of anything, and whenever I try to bring up something interesting/new or ask him why he thinks or feels a certain way he says "I don't know about all that" or "hmmm." That's not how you keep a conversation alive. Drives me up the wall especially when we're talking about our hobbies. He is unaware and doesn't think much so he never really has observations, even about things he likes. At most he says "I like x" or "I don't like x" and if I ask him why he says he's not really sure.

I don't understand because he is intelligent, and he's always telling me his misses me and loves me, but it always seems he puts 0 effort into our conversations. It feels like a lot of work and makes me want to be alone a lot of the time, even though we live together. I should talk to him about it soon but it's hard to say "hey, stop being a sperg and hold a proper conversation"

No. 435091

i had this feeling when i began to notice small ones beginning at my nose. it's probably completely false, but my mom told me this: laugh lines and smile lines (the ones near your eyes) mean you've expressed joy many times in your life!

flip it and reverse it, anon. it happens to everyone, but now when i notice those little creases near my nose i smile even more. don't nitpick yourself for things you can't control.

No. 435104

I finally have a desk and I put it together all by myself even though I got kind of intimidated by the packet of instructions. It's really nice and I'm super proud of myself for it. I haven't had a desk in over year and was sitting on the floor everyday just to use the PC. It's such a nice desk for being on the slightly cheap side (got it on clearance and only saw good reviews.) I think I'm only worried about the PC not having enough air circulation but I can always move it if that's the case.

No. 435109

Hey, scrote. I bet u dont even do this shit. So why don't you stop watching varg vikernes videos and stop fantasizing about an apocalypse that you would die in 42 hours in. Go to a different imageboard, nerd ass.

No. 435111

i read on wikipedia for mindfulness that practicing mindfulness can help ease symptoms. you've probably tried it but worth a mention

No. 435119

I didn't get the apartment

It's the best apartment in the city
Low price, decent size, great neighborhood, and surrounded by trees and flowers

I didn't get it and now I have to get a slightly more expensive apartment in a slightly less appealing area or continue living with my 62 year old aunt (pleas don't ask)

Why can't I just have everything go right for like a year?
Hell, a month.
I went looking for a 4 leaf clover earlier this year, found one, and I think I used up all the luck I had for the rest of my life.

No. 435125

i'm 28 and make 10.25 an hour.

i got a full scholarship to college but didnt complete it bc mental illness. i was making decent money waitressing (as far as jobs without skills/degree go) but had to quit and get a job i could walk to because i crashed my car. there werent many options.

i have thousands of dollars in debt from the mental hospital a few months ago and my car crash, and at this rate i'm never going to be able to crawl out of it.

literally why even live

No. 435139

You're only 30. The world is enormous and that's truly an understatement - I am sure there's something out there you can find purpose in. What parts of your life are you dissatisfied with? Your career? Perhaps you could consider a career change. Feeling bored in general? Try taking up a hobby. Your social life? Maybe try getting closer to a coworker, reconnecting with old friends, or register for fitness classes at your gym. Not everyone is "out to get you" and you are not a "burden". And I am sure there is someone out there that will like you for who you are. And I promise you are not as "awkward and annoying" as you think - other people are usually caught up in their own business to notice. Plus it's lucky that you have loving parents. Not everyone can say that. You could spend more time together with them.
I hope you find peace in your life.

No. 435146

I have almost no friends. I've been struggling with crippling depression for most of my life, and now that I am finally starting to get better, I want to reach out to people.

I have tried talking and hanging out with other girls but I keep getting burnt or in fake ass friendships. Every girl I strike up something with is a brat/princess that won't do anything unless there is something in it for them or if I do all the work. I just wish I could be friends with someone who could get me and I wouldn't have to walk on damn egg shells with. The only people I can talk to is my boyfriend and one friend. I am so lonely…

No. 435148

Yesterday I went to a friend’s birthday which usually invites all the people whom he knows because we live in a pretty small town and everyone knows each other.
There was this kid, he’s not exactly a kid but his mind is. He’s 20 but he has the mind of a 12 years old. It’s not very noticeable, people may also or not notice it. It’s just that when you start to know him, you notice that he can’t keep a smart conversation about lot of topics. Also, he has some kind of habits like repeating the same questions over and over again, or having to touch everything because otherwise he gets anxious.
His parents feel ashamed of him. I don’t know how to put it in other words.
You see, as I said, we live in a pretty small town so everyone can notice that whatever this boy has, it’s not perfectly fine. Except for his parents.
They never told anyone about it, not even their family and I never thought how bad it may be until yesterday.
When birthday boy was blowing the candles, this boy got all excited and started clapping and laughing. Then he got really serious and turned to his mother (I was close to them) and asked her “is my retardation showing?”, and then the excuse of a mother he has smiled at him and said something like “no, darling, and don’t say these things here or people will notice it.”
I wanted to cry. How can you educate your son to feel ashamed of who he is? I get that everybody wants to have perfect children and nobody likes to have some troubles while parenting but this? Make your own child think there is something to feel ashamed about himself? For what? So people won’t talk behind your back (they do anyways!)? So people won’t think your son is “special, different”? What’s wrong with it?
I felt so bad for him, I couldn’t believe what he said. He seemed very quiet afterwards.
I can’t comprehend how can someone have the courage to make his own son think it’s okay to hide something that he is, basically because they seem ashamed of his behaviour.

No. 435149

what the fuck, that's such childish behaviour
she could've asked you before planning too, or at least not write it off as your fault when it's not
don't make this another thing to stress about, the exam is hard enough

No. 435159

wtf i love your ex now. she sounds like an award winning cow. it's too bad that you were entangled with her bc she must be hilarious to watch from afar. def don't go back to this person.

No. 435161

I feel you anon. I’m in the same boat and find myself either getting fucked over or quickly find my new ‘friend’ has some fatal flaw. The last one turned out to be a cokehead who stole some of my expired make up. Wasn’t really bothered because she saved me a trip to the dumpster. It’s a shit cycle because you have to be confident to attract quality people who respect you, but after years of fair weather friends and assholes, it’s hard to not take it personal. If I had to impart any advice from someone who doesn’t have the balls to do it themselves, try putting yourself out there regardless. Do something you feel confident in and try to meet someone with that as a common interest. Keep your head up anon, being lonely isn’t permanent.

No. 435169

Reading this make me incredibly uncomfortable and upset. The parents are total cunts. Poor guy, fucking sucks having to be raised by shit parents.

No. 435190

File: 1563270639902.jpeg (89.78 KB, 490x406, 73239350-BBBF-4E4D-9C66-B0A005…)

can feel myself slowly being replaced and forgotten by someone i thought was really into me, so i’m starving myself because hunger pangs numb out the heartache i feel. i hate being 19 and inexperienced (never had a bf only puppy e-dating). it’s rare that i get crushes on people, when i do i get in to deep, put all my eggs in one basket, and get sad when i see that it’s not reciprocated the same. i know that adults usually like to keep their options open when it comes to dating by mingling with other people or just continually searching for something better, not being invested in the first person they’re into. but i’m not like that, at all. i like someone, and they’re the only person i can kline and show romantic interest in, that’s it. and i know that most of what i feel is due to low self esteem and inexperience but it’s still a bitch to come to terms with. i know i’ll probably grow out of it as i get older and get over it but right now i just feel so worthless, undesirable, and invisible

No. 435255

I've been depressed since my early teens but now my circumstances have gotten worse and consequently I'm more depressed.
In the past I could pretty much hide everything and act as if I'm totally fine but in recent years it's been getting harder and harder to the point where you can see my mood on my face. Some days I do feel better and thus seem more "normal" but most of the time it's like that.
I didn't notice it until people around me started asking why I'm upset, annoyed etc. and tbh it's gotten too exhausting for me to act like I'm ok so I'd rather just be like that and isolate myself instead of explaining myself to people or ruining the mood.

Can any depressed anons relate?

No. 435259

i have such a pile of unresolved aggro and curiosity towards a local cow, she was an actual rapist, cosplay mess and all around a deranged cunt. i digged through old cgl threads for something else and remembered the bitch, and this pure annoyance bubbled up. i am so angry i don't really wanna bring her up to friends because they would either just dance around the subject bc they're legit scared of her or just tell me to forget it all and be happy she's off socials (at least not public). i just wanna talk shit and figure out wtf really happened?

No. 435261

>>435146 you could maybe pick up a hobby? something low competetive, at least you would find people interested in the same thing as you are! there's also the friend finder thread somewhere on lolcow. don't get dscouraged, anon!

No. 435262

I relate. Some days I thought I had a fake smile on my face and people still asked if I was OK. My depression has been running strong now for nearly 2 decades and some days it's gone and some days (like today) it's present and I skipped an important lab I shouldn't have with no excuses until I turn up tomorrow.

I was in therapy but I had a change of address and couldn't attend any longer this was nearly a few years ago. I was on anti depressants in the absence of therapy NHS accepted that I had been in therapy so just gave me 40mg and that was it. I hated the tablets complained switched around dosages, tablets, ballooned in size, already had social anxiety became more anxious. Took myself off antidepressants had a bad few months. I've isolated myself a lot from people.

But. The fogginess of the antidepressants lifted a few months ago and I've been working out, forcing myself outside and going places I normally wouldn't and I feel better as a person and lighter. Today is a bad day and this morning felt like everything was impossible but I can already feel my mood lifting a lot. It ebs and flows. And I find exercise has helped me the most although sometimes there can be days with no motivation. It's just always a battle it seems.

No. 435266

I don't like playing games with my bf anymore. He is much better than me, but the few times I win, he gets so angry it scares me. I wish he could be happy for me instead. Like, I get that he is competitive, but I hardly ever win so I don't get why he has to be so mad about it.

No. 435273

I can't fucking do long division or long multiplication the standard way. It just doesn't click in my stupid brain. I'm 24 and all my years of schooling I've used the other methods they taught (lotus method for multiplication and another method for division that also uses a lot of addition) and they work well and it clicks in my head but I can't help but feel really fucking stupid that I don't understand how to do it the standard way. My best friend is studying to be an elementary school teacher and said "well it's fine since that's why they teach kids a bunch of different methods anyway" but I feel like at 24 I should really just understand how to do it. I used to sometimes help her with assignments when she was trying to understand how alternative methods worked (she had to learn them all) and like… all of them would click relatively quick EXCEPT the standard way. Every time I try to teach myself or learn, the second I try to do a problem by myself with a method that I JUST watched a video on less than a minute go, my brain fucking blanks out. Why the fuck am I so stupid?

No. 435276

Thanks for sharing, anon. It's "nice" to have someone understand you for once.
The whole medication thing sounds pretty exhausting. It's good that you're trying different things though, I hope better days are coming for you…

No. 435301

There's this guy I used to like a couple years ago. He's my younger brother's best friend but I also often hung out with him (now they're 22 and I'm 23, soon 24).
Since a couple weeks ago he's dating a 17-year-old we've both known for years.
Am I in the wrong for finding this creepy?
It's perectly legal in my country and my mom insists that I'm in the wrong for finding this weird. I said what would you tell me if I brought a 12th grade student home, but yeah.
My sister agrees with me too, but I still wonder whether this makes me a bitter old spinster who's just jealous of a young girl. I'm a kissless virgin and she's dating the man I had a crush on. It also makes me worry, when guys who are only a year and a half younger than me like 17-year-olds, then do I even have a chance of ever getting somebody close to my age? The only men who ever show interest in me are all 50+.
Last week I met her at the gyno so it's safe to say they're probably fucking already.
Feels like shit. She's so pretty and skinny too. I wish I was younger again, I have so many regrets, there are so many things I'd do differently

No. 435309

Wow, sorry anon but you're dating a manchild. Video games are supposed to be fun and they're the dumbest shit to get mad over.

No. 435310

Huge redflag, anon. If he can't handle you being better at VIDEO GAMES how do you think he'll handle you being better at literally anything else than him?

No. 435311

I dont know anyone who feels that way about 22 year olds except weirdos tbh… 22 and 17 year olds arent supposed to look visually that different because 22 and 23 is still young as hell

No. 435314

NTA but you lose a LOT of baby fat by 21ish and a 22 year old in a completely different world than a high schooler, while the gap is small the difference in power is huge

Plus teenagers are all gangly and unstable, I don’t trust adults that pursue someone too young to be trusted with voting power

No. 435315

the brain doesn't finish developing till age 25.

No. 435318

I don’t see what your point is. Doesn’t change the fact that teenagers are objectively unstable and that even a young adult has much more power than them

No. 435321

I do think the age difference is weird but I'm American where the physical separation of college campuses and drinking laws discourages me this.

No. 435322

21 and 22 year olds are usually still in college, anon. more responsibility doesn't mean more brains.

No. 435326

Is this somehow supposed to dispute the fact that they have more power than those that still require parental permission?

No. 435336

So you think that I am the one who's in the wrong for thinking it's creepy? I could never imagine dating somebody her age, I already felt guilty for liking him even though our age difference is not that big.

It just sucks, back then I never made a move because I thought I'm not his type (he dated a very small, cute and babyfaced girl before), but his gf now is more like I me - just nearly 7 years younger and better looking…

No. 435338

I don't think you're wrong, anon. My own experience tells me there's no way a man won't take advantage of being more mature, having more freedom and being more knowledgeable about the world than his girlfriend. Adult men who are willing to date underage girls are seeking a power dynamic that will allow them, at best, to flatter their own ego and get away with being a prick, and at worst, to be outright abusers.

I don't think you should be focusing on pining after this guy and feeling envy, though. He sounds sleazy and gross.

No. 435339

you're literally grasping at straws here. 17 is legal age in some areas anyway.

No. 435340

I know this is so stupid, but I am beyond over people oohing and aahing over Cardi B whenever she says anything remotely political. She has no original opinions or talking points, and she sounds so idiotic it makes my brain hurt. I hate that people worship celebs so much these days.

No. 435341

if you somehow think a 22 year old is more knowledgeable than a 17 year old you need to go out more.

No. 435349

my friend was raped by my boyfriends bandmate and i cannot do anything about it since she wont speak out, this guy has raped multiple girls. i hate my boyfriend for assosiating with this vermin, i hate that band, i hate that they're becoming sucessful. they harbour women haters and abusers and i doubt my boyfriend is much different given his tolerance of this

No. 435353

Are you legit dating a rape apologist? I used to roadie for bands 10 years ago and they tell everything to each other behind closed doors, including who they are fucking and what drugs they're doing. your boyfriend knows all of this and doesnt care. this is disgusting

No. 435377

I only recently found out so probably not for long.
I just dont know how to talk to him about it or approach it and i dont know yet if he knows but from what the victim has said, he doesnt know.

It terrifies me to imagine he is a rape apologist but its probably going to be the case.

No. 435382

File: 1563301880472.png (366.31 KB, 469x894, death_by_digi_m-d4gx8k0.png)

I fucking had enough of life, I don't even wanna bother talking of it but everything seems dull and meaningless.
My long term relationship is failing too, he has like 0 interest in me, all the compliments/ dick pics I'm getting are from men I'm scared of.
I would honestly appreciate it if I die right here right now, every consequences seems bad.

No. 435383

i never felt negatively towards other women until i started coming here regularly. at first i thought it was a fun place to gossip but now i think it's actively damaging my perceptions of my friends in the real world. instead of feeling better about women, i feel worse. some of the threads make me really depressed but i keep coming back. sometimes i feel like this place isn't even women, it's so stereotypically mean girls that it has to be a put- on.

No. 435386

my (now ex) boyfriend knew i was sexually abused. he was a shitty person but he seemed to empathize with that one thing and promised nobody would be able to do it again, then went on to rape me towards the end of our relationship. i broke up with him and kicked him out a while ago but i don't feel like i'm free of him… i don't think i ever will be. i feel more alone, unlovable, and worthless than ever before and leaving him might have ruined my only chance at love, no matter how bad it was for me

No. 435393

At risk of sounding like another mean girl, are you new to imageboards? Lolcow is not particularly vicious but it can be if you're accustomed to online spaces that are not anonymous.

No. 435410

No im saying you thinking you are some old hag at 22 23 is stupid and that you are extremely youthful and fresh faced at that age too

Im talking purely physical differences.. I was contesting anon who thinks early twenties is a hag or visually visibly older than teens and its not true.; its the same reason that makes exlusive or reoccuring ephebophilia retarded because its about control and power rather than aesthetics most of the time

No. 435411

She said until she started coming here so sounds pretty new. Anyone who's been here for the 5 years this site's been open and beyond is thick skinned as fuck and knows not to take things said here personally.

No. 435427

i'm surprised you say that, anon. i feel like i'm pretty neutral coming here or not. i can see how you'd say that about general though. i'm been in anonymous female oriented communities before. sometimes you'll get a supportive anon and then think 'what if this is that bitch who trolled me about another topic before?' i feel a bond despite that. it's nice hearing what women really think instead of surface level bullshit.

No. 435434

i really fucking want to swim laps again but there are no pools around here, wtf???

No. 435443

Wth…..I do not understand why the boy I am dating often doesn't get my jokes or pretends he doesn't, dismisses it and then when I explain them, he ignores me. Is he literally retarded?

No. 435450

I'm tired of seeing people shitting on the concept of 'intuitive eating'. It's just eating according to your hunger/fullness cues. I was taught this after 7 years of ED and it helped me get my sanity back. Sanity I didn't have in those seven years. I basically had to remember how I ate as a child, before any kind of restriction set in and I was healthy, active and happy.
It's not IE's fault that it was appropriated by fat activists to mean "eat a whole cake until your stomach is bursting if you feel like it".

No. 435453

I know the advice is "dump him" so I won't even give the backstory but. How. When we're engaged, everything for the wedding is booked, and we own a house together? As a side note, I've tried everything to try and save this.

No. 435455

Stop going to gossip boards and stay in offtopic boards.

No. 435458

File: 1563311654346.gif (15.54 KB, 600x450, sadcat.gif)

Me being dumb goes on tinder to find a boyfriend. Every guy I talk to ghost me after making every attempt to keep a conversation going and appearing interesting.
I also have this insecure feeling that if I am the one starting the convo after getting a match. It meant I am ugly and they swipe me on accident.

No. 435459

Look, either way you are going to lose money. Either you lose it now or you lose it later. If you lose it later though you're going to lose out on even more money. Regardless going through with a marriage because of the sunk cost of the wedding arrangements is stupid. You can cancel and even get some of the money back. If you can't get refunded you might be able to 'sell' the venue to another couple to recoup the costs. You don't need special stationary to tell guests the wedding is off. Honestly a mass text is fine. Have a family member field questions from nosy people. Sell the house for cash upfront to a Chinese real estate firm, they will eat up the offer fast. Get out.

No. 435460

Stay away from those threads. It's exactly what you describe. A place where bitter, insecure girls gather to be mean to other women.

No. 435467

I'm so fucking fed up at my work with not only my coworker but the customers. I work at a local lingerie store and i s2g all day long all I hear is fat girls going on about how "no store carries their size
" even tho we go up to a fucking 4XL. I'm really petite and can't fit into 99% of the store bc my boobs are so small but the second I say anything related to this my fatass coworker, or customers, just goes on a rant about being "uwu oppressed bc fat shaming" . I've struggled with an ed for years and this is exactly why I can never open up to anyone about it cause 'skinny people have no real problems' is such a genuine sentiment these days. Bleh fuck the anti-fatphobia movement sry rant over lmao.

No. 435472

It's okay anon, I drank the dumb bitch juice too and signed up for Tinder as well after ending a LDR. Every guy I have met up with has either taken advantage of me or ghosted me. At first I didn't mind because I was legitimately just trying to get over my ex. I always viewed Tinder as a meat market, but in the back of my mind I always heard those stories about people finding their boyfriends or girlfriends on it so I was hopeful I'd click with someone or they'd consider me special.

I deactivated it two days ago. Good riddance.

No. 435473

lmao i used to work in a women's clothing store that carried plus sizes and i'm not even petite, but not plus sized. there were constantly morbidly obese women coming at me for suggesting things to them that would "only look good on a stick like you". sorry you're literally 700 lbs i'm just doing my job.

No. 435491

Anon you replied to and
I have a great career in the field I have a degree in. I make good money and worked really hard to get where I am.
>Social life
I have a lot of acquaintances that I'm mutually cordial with but not that close.
I have a lot of (solitary) hobbies because if I didn't I would probably lose the last sense of purpose I feel like I have.
My parents are busy with their own life with their own problems and goals. Despite loving me we're not very close and understandably they don't live for their adult children's sake.
>other people are usually caught up in their own business to notice.
Exactly. I don't matter to people at all. I'm not a part of anyone's life. I have no value because a person who's not a part of a social network isn't a person at all. That was my point.

I'm too damaged to ever have a boyfriend and I'm lowkey afraid of men due to my past experiences. I'm too damaged to feel like I belong somewhere and I always end up thinking that outside of professional environments, I'm a burden and can't contribute anything worthwhile. Literally all I have is my career and my introverted hobbies and that's what I've been dedicating my life to. It just gets crippling when I realize that if I died tomorrow, only my parents would care. This came to be some years ago when I almost died in an accident and it traumatized me, mostly because I received zero to no sympathy from the people around me. I try not to think about it by drowning myself in my work, hobbies and escapism. Didn't think my life would turn out this way but it did, so I just have to make do like >>434904 suggested. Just here for the ride and living for myself.

It's hard being this age because you're expected to stand on your own two feet and just deal with it. Reaching out is troublesome because I have a great career and some skills I've perfected over the years, so I'm often met with hostile envy which only contributes to my cynicism and indifference (You know, the "you can't have real problems" sorta stuff). I guess I just wanted to vent here because I don't have anywhere else to go and had to get it off my chest to see if anyone else felt the same way. First time I've vented about my life and it'll be the last, sorry to be such a sperg.

No. 435504

I don't want to post this in the pink pill thread because it's a blogpost but it's about Bianca Devins and how fucking appalled and shocked I am by the reaction of men and even some women to her death. Yeah I know I shouldn't be surprised by anything on the internet anymore but the lack of empathy towards her is insane. My best friend from high school was really similar to Bianca. Posted her underage nudes on 4chan and reddit, was with multiple men and had a tendency to use them, hypersexual and needed male validation because of sexual abuse. I can't completely confirm if she was truly like this but that's the narrative 4chan is pushing so I'll roll with it. This girl treated me like shit and constantly took advantage of me, and even though I've completely cut her out of my life and was really affected by what she did to me, I would still never wish something like what happened to Bianca onto her. I can't fucking believe people think she deserved this. Men are going off about how "we don't understand" what's it's like to be treated by a girl like this but I do and since I have actual human decency I still think it's horrific! I fucking hate these men and pick me ass women who write off a loss of life because they hate women so much.

No. 435510

I always assume that the gossip threads are filled with men. Some of the comments are so fucking vile and insensitive (also nitpicky as fuck) that I can't really imagine a woman would write that. I mean, the possibility of course exists, but I also think men take advantage of the general bitterness of those threads to talk shit about the cows all they want, without nobody yelling them to go back to 4chan or whatever.
Mariah's thread in particular I'm pretty damn sure is full of guys who are bitter at the fact the can't fuck her, so they nitpick on every single physical thing they can to feel better about themselves.
Again, not saying every single comment is made by a man, but don't doubt they are writing the nastiest shit in those threads while we keep calling them "mean girls".

No. 435516

I just finally decided to help my two nieces and her baby get away from a toxic family situation under one condition that they would get a job or help around and that they would stop being promiscuous and doing drugs. First day the oldest leaves her child alone not letting me know where she went. they have no phone with service just one that they use the wifi with…. her baby is crying for her …for 3 hrs. she came back around 12 am take in mind that two people in the house had to wake up at 4 am to go to work. She tells me she was with a guy smoking a blunt. I just nod and say dont do that again please. second day we get the youngest of the two situated in her room and all. we go to the park to keep them from being bored and tire out her energetic baby..well toddler. anyways all is well until the youngest one says i wanna go back to x town and stay for a couple of days I say we struggled so much to get you out of there at least wait two weeks til we get money to go visit your mom she yells at me to stop trying to take her away from her mother…..her mother beat her and is doing meth. I tell her no one is trying to get you away from your mom we are trying to let her get better by herself and encourage her to come over and get better. she lashes out i lose my cool for a bit. She storms in and screams at my mom to take her back with her own mom that I had told her to leave and never come back. I never said that. the whole ngiht is spent arguing with the youngest girl. Next day i finally decide to set up a wifi curfew from 7 am to 3 pm. this whole day theyve been angry and asking to please let them use the wifi. I just say no they say that they wanna finish watching a movie and I tell her but i know you'll end up using facebook and messaging with multiple guys and she says no i wont. but i fee wary i tell her no anyways . Now i'm just sad. They dont wanna get better. they just wanna fuck around do drugs and its hard just for me and my mom to deal with them. but no one else was helping them and they were begging for help.
I know this is gonna be hard. but these kinds of problems run deep. Its not easy but for them to be so reactive in around 4 days is just fuck also they've already broken a faucet and clogged the sink with pubes and thrown dirty diapers on the floor. they are young girls that have only learned how to do grown up stuff and not anything else, even basic hygiene care or even common sense .

No. 435518

I dunno if men know what a nasolabial fold and this kind of shit is. Sounds more like insecure women shitting on other women to make themselves feel better which is much worse than a man.

No. 435527

File: 1563320105747.jpeg (25.87 KB, 280x400, 1_-_tHEKNO-NAbeZZdwASKTA.jpeg)

I have no idea how the anons that are independent adults able to sustain relationships, hobbies anb jobs do it.
In theory I should be able to do those things, I'm fairly smart and not that autistic but it feels like whenever I get a minor set back, usual involving other people and social interactions/expectations, or get some negative vibes from the group I'm involved with at the time my whole world crumbles and I become an anxious mess unable to keep my routines and getting out of the bed, if I try really hard I end up getting a compulsion to hide inside bathrooms stalls or to run away from all.
It sucks, I've done therapy multiple times, taken meds, read self help books, tried keeping a journal and exploring my childhood traumas, yet I can't get out of this damn loop.
Shit, I'll be 27 in like three months and I have nothing, no friends, career, degree, gf/bf, and it's all my damn fault.
Some times I legit wonder if I have some sort of mental retardation because I've read about a lot of people that have worse traumas, history and Asperger's, and still manage to become somewhat functional. wtf

No. 435531

>Sounds more like insecure women shitting on other women
I think that's the case, especially when seeing how camwhore lolcows attract anons who brag about how much better of a camgirl they are, or the alt thread has those anons writing lengthy posts about how they're true goths.
It's a shame because those threads can have great milk and legit fun discussions when they're not a clit-measuring contest.

No. 435535

>Sounds more like insecure women shitting on other women to make themselves feel better.

Momokun's thread has been outed before as being populated with rival cosplayers because they forgot to crop out their own profiles in screengrabs.
Dolly threads are full of camgirls who constantly boast about themselves and nitpick over other camgirls doing it wrong.
Pet YouTuber threads are full of pet hoarders who think they're veterinarians and experts.
Sh0e's thread is full of pickmes (Venti) or ex pickme cool girls who are mad that someone like Sh0e reached e-success with that persona.
The anorexic scumbag thread is full of "recovered" ED farmers or farmers with ongoing ED who try to medfag or blogpost out of experience.

I could go on. What's also really annoying is whenever any type of infrequent "outsider" makes a comment about the lolcows that doesn't fall in line with the typical nitpicks and insults, the farmers get supremely off-color and angry because they feel like you've interrupted their flow. It's their cow.

No. 435536

I heard stories about tinder/dating app success stories. I want to uninstall, but I'm clueless on where else I can talk to local guys at.

No. 435543

How do I quit being intimidated/afraid of women? I don't mean it in a "I hate girls!!, I'm not like the other girls" way, but I seriously get nervous when I see them, or talk to them. I'm not afraid of men at all, and I could easily talk back and call them out on their shitty attitudes, but I just can't for women.

No. 435545

Probably because the rejection of women would sting worse than the rejection by males, right?
It's okay anon. Just remember that everyone has insecurities and anxieties deep down. If lolcow should teach you anything it's that lots of farmers here struggle to make new female friends.
If you keep in mind that common ground, women seem a lot less intimidating. Got any hobbies you could branch out in?

No. 435547

…Why? It's the opposite for me. Men are mean as shit and see you as inferior.

No. 435552

Unless they want to fuck you, in which case they suck up and fake nice, and they are often noticeably nervous and trying to impress you. Some are always mean to your face or let their true nature show, but in my experience most are too awkward and ugly to risk offending you (hence the existence of 'nice guys').

No. 435566

I’m less nervous around men (beside when they act a certain way that triggers trauma-based fear) because I guess I know I hold a certain kind of power as a woman? I.e. they wanna smash, young or old. Also society did a good job grooming me to play the charming flirty dumb bitch act.
Women tend to be intuitive and see right through the bullshit. So I feel more scrutinized because I feel like I wasn’t socialized to be in as tune with other women’s emotional needs… and worry I will accidentally come off like a bitch. I found it helpful to remind myself that most women aren’t evil bitches who are constantly trying to one-up, dominate and sabotage you. They’re also trying to gage you as well, that’s the awkward feeling we get sometimes. And those heavily afflicted with internalized misogyny make it obvious rather quickly and thus their approval is unneeded.

No. 435572

Men treat you like shit if they're not attracted to you

If they are, they basically worship the ground you walk on

No. 435576

Until they get tired of you and just ignore you til you disappear because they dont actually have to balls to tell you they're not interested anymore like my ex boyfriend

No. 435579

True but i think anon is talking about new casual acquaintances.

No. 435585

Serious cosplay discussion between adults is cringe. I hate it when it happens in lolcow threads as if it actually matters.

No. 435586

I don't cosplay but I don't get how that's cringe. I've always thought making costumes and clothes and stuff is pretty cool.

No. 435590

There's nothing cool about seeing an adult sperg and insult another adult for not matching their fictional characters in an elaborate game of grown up dress up.

No. 435602

I get the feeling I will be mostly alone for the rest of my life. Most of my friends either don’t seem to care about me or are moving away. Even when I join groups and engage in hobbies, I just feel alone. Every guy I’ve been with has either abused me or never really loved me. I just think there is something about me that is incompatible with humanity.

No. 435605

Curious, what do you eat the rest of the year if you don't have access to produce? How do you stay healthy?

No. 435609

i recently reconnected with an ex and we've been exchanging emails.. i wrote a really long one, like ~3k words, talking about how my life has been and the hardships i've been facing… super emotional stuff that was difficult for me to write. his reply was two paragraphs long. feels like a slap in the face. i thought we could be friends but that shit is just insulting. i feel like a fool, i just never open up to anybody and it felt like an appropriate time.

No. 435620

File: 1563341788970.jpg (18.42 KB, 410x255, 5dfb77111ebc6208faa283b93279b8…)

All my friends, who are 25+ mind you, are fucking obessed with tiktok. I know i am being a no-fun-allow bitch, but i find the app incredibly childish. I wish the app fucking disappear. They are all so fucking cringy. I can't even watch them. You all are 25+ year old. Stop acting like teenager lip syncing to old memes. Your story time are worst on video then in person. What worse they exaggerate every story. Even the ones i was there.

No. 435622

I'm trying to recover from my ED, I've gained so much weight though and like, in a way it's good? People compliment me and I actually have curves now but I feel so awful. I don't even wanna be so unhealthy again logically but durrhurr ED brain.
I haven't been restricting as bad as I used to but I started purging when I can (which isn't THAT often, 3 days a week maybe, otherwise I'm at my boyfriend's house and can't)

I'm finally a year clean of cutting, and free of hard drugs and my slipping back into ED is making me afraid of slipping back into those.

No. 435624

I really wish I were straight or bisexual. I don't want to be that girl who's like, ~I'm not like other girls uwu~ but yeah pretty much.
It'd be so much easier to just snag a metalhead dude, we'd have so much in common. I haven't seen a single chick on Her or Tinder listen to even the most basic of metal or rock, and music and going to concerts is such a huge part of my life. At this point I'd even settle for a long-haired dude who'd let me dominate him.

No. 435626

How do I end my internalized misogyny

for a good chunk of my life I have had an extreme feeling of bitterness, frustration, and sometimes hatred towards my own gender. I have always had my trust most betrayed in my life by women. Lied to the most by women, and have been abused and bullied by women, including by my own mother when I was a child. Now the problem lies with my extreme desire for male acceptance even though I am well aware now how stupid it is. I have been through terrible situations with men,yet I still don’t have this wall around me when it comes to making relationships with other men. My father was in the picture,and was a good dad but was almost never home because of his job. I am bisexual, so dealing with this has always been a pain for that aspect as well. I hate how judgmental I become, and my male friends will often laugh at me for having so much distrust for other girls. I really want to fully call myself a feminist. I love hearing about strong, smart, and talented women conquering their fears and achieving their goals, yet I struggle to let any girls in my life get close to me. I’m always afraid of getting hurt or not being enough of a woman. A fear I had developed from other girls in my life calling me too masculine and a dyke. I overthink it so much, and makes me upset to tears that this is such a problem for me. I compliment girls daily on their talents, their looks, or just being awesome moms or pet owners or great at their job. Yet this hatred won’t leave my brain, and the male acceptance can sometimes affect the state of relationship with my current male partner. I haven’t made a true female friend since middle school, and that hurts just to say. I just want to know what I can do to try and make this disgusting part of me go away and move forward with the women trying to make the world better.

No. 435637

there needs to be a separate internet for adults, and wtf is it with divorce tiktoks? Way to cheapen a relationship and all of lifes moments in general.

No. 435638

I've just cut contact with two important persons in my life. First is a bitch and it hurted more being backstabbed than the actual separation, the other one is a girl I truly loved and I didn't want to hurt her any longer, it was unavoidable.
Feel like shit and have 9hrs of travel ahead of me with no headphones.

No. 435640

There are so many bi girls in heavy music scenes, even if you aren't finding them on tindr they exist, you'll find one eventually anon!
Make an effort to talk to people at gigs, try and go to see bands that have a lgbt fanbase such as smaller intersectional leaning punk bands if you can get into that, and if you can deal with it then maybe try and look a little stereotypically gay at those events. It's going to be harder to find girls without their wonderbread attachments at metal gigs, but if you find a girl at a more niche punk gig then you might still have enough musical crossover that she can come to those gigs with you in the future.

Side note but as a bi girl I can't imagine putting my music tastes on my tindr bio because it would just invite annoying guys to quiz me on being a poser

No. 435641

Don't know what you are talking about.
I just want to vent about my adult frienss using a kid app.

No. 435645

About to do the same. Here's to opening new doors, anon. It hurts like a bitch.

No. 435648

I had my sleep interrupted with this dull aching chest pain and shortness of breath, and it's physically sickening, but I have no idea whether it's severe or not? It feels like hell and my chest feels horrible, I'm lying down and short of breath but I'm breathing, it's like this very dull but hellish heaviness in my chest that feels like pain

been experiencing cycling shortness of breath the entire day today (or should I say since yesterday evening), took aspirin at work to try and help it, it's not debilitating enough to be life threatening so going to the ER might be a waste of time / money… unfortunately I haven't gone to a practitioner doc in like 4 years and I have really no other resources to go to if this is an actual problem, am I just being a hypochondriac or what

I was off my psychological meds for 5 months, have been back on them for 5-7 weeks now with no symptoms, and never experienced reactions like this so I doubt it's my meds that are making me physically sick / short of breath, only one of them gives me physical symptoms and I don't take that one till tomorrow morning so it's definitely not that (my antidepressants that I take in the morning make me queasy, I take anti anxiety at morning and at night, mood stabilizer at night, the latter two never caused me any problems), I am currently on day 2 of my period but I doubt shortness of breath and chest pain is a symptom of that

I've had mild symptoms of asthma my entire life, never been an actual asthmatic, sometimes I have terrible allergies and shortness of breath that strains my voice but nothing that's ever given me this intensity of chest pain. like I said I was experiencing it yesterday during work no less and it dulled my voice down a lot, took two aspirins, inhaled some smelly herbal stuff to try and clear out any allergy blockage, that worked temporarily, and now that I've woken up at like 3am it seems to be back and even more relentless.

I'm fucking retarded for venting wondering what could be causing this chest pain, at what point should I drag myself to some kind of doctor, at what point does it become an issue I wonder. Maybe I'll just end up fucking dying or maybe it will dissipate and never be an issue again after tonight

No. 435651

Not to be mean, but you sound too normie to fit in here if this site is too mean for you. Maybe try reddit.

No. 435652

You need to call a doctor. I'm worried about you since it's interrupting your sleep. If it woke you up, sounds like it's a problem that needs to be checked out as soon as possible. Breathing issues can be scary, so please try to take it easy in the mean time until you can get a check up. Hope you're okay.

No. 435653

there's a lot of threads I hide because they aren't something I want to see anon I think you should do the same if you see them as damaging, I really hate a lot of the politically charged threads on ot and I hide them for the reason that I have no desire to see the bitterness contained therein a lot of them, plus I actually don't hold any severe animosity towards trans people or men

No. 435656

Please don't do it anon,You can still fix your life

No. 435659

I've had abnormal sleep interruptions without chest pain for weeks on and off (sometimes they happen, sometimes they'd don't) because I have been trying to alter my sleep schedule after staying up till 3-5am for the five months when I was off my meds, and it's been hell, but this is the first time I've experienced chest pain and shortness of breath after waking up (it's gottten a bit better since I posted but it's still uncomfortable). I've been in a new environment for weeks now and I don't think there's any excuse for me to be experiencing this that isn't medical, completely separate from all my issues at hand I've had people tell me over the course of yesterday that it could be anxiety induced, but there's no reason anxiety would be making it pop up twice in the span of less than 24hrs like this. If I've been regularly taking my meds again for 5-7 weeks it makes no sense for this to be induced by them and it makes no sense that it would happen at two unrelated points in the day (evening and very early morning) or stress, I've had moments of very high stress on some days in the last 3-5 weeks and nothing like this has ever occurred before recently… ofc I have the right to be scared

Not sure it'll help, since right now we don't get along the best (dealing with internal family drama that was spurred on by me moving out of my dads house and into my moms after an incident happened and my dad completely shattered 5 years of trust he'd built up in me, it fucking depresses me to think about) but i will tell my mother tomorrow about this and tell her I might need to make an appointment with some kind of doc/clinic even though I don't have a general practitioner right now, this isn't normal and I'm not going to hide it no matter how much I hope it kills me, there's a lot of things I need to resolve and hiding my problems only tends to make them worse so might as well admit something is wrong while it's happening… or it will be too late and go unchecked and the last time that happened, it didn't end well

thanks for your concerns, I'm going to try and get back to sleep now and see if it's still there when I wake up

No. 435661

They're not alone, people I know who are 25+ use it more than my teenage siblings and that really shows..

No. 435662

Stay safe, anon. You know what you have to do. I don't know what country you're in (assuming America bc it's night here and you mentioned hospital costs lel), but if you think it stems from a physical issue, don't let your physician tell you the problem is stemming from mental issues, and don't let them keep turning your attention away from your physical pain because you're dealing with mental stuff. You're there for one specific thing and you're already being treated for your mental health so your physician should not be so focused on that. Don't answer the bullshit depression questionnaire if you don't have to.
Just speaking from personal experience. Went in for gastrointestinal pains once and my doctor ended up wanting to admit me in a ward for my depression. Ridiculous.

No. 435663

File: 1563354107648.jpg (179.52 KB, 1215x1018, 6xuaajkpkul21.jpg)

while i used to feel shittier in the past and more self conscious,now that im feeling better im loosing hope that i will truly be understood by anyone.i feel like i cant be truly honest because i will either be judged or the others will take my words too personally.i know i have no place to judge people,but having gone through a bunch of therapy and introspection,i see how blind others are to how they truly are and their issues.i spent most of my life being borderline agoraphobic and i barely have friends and the few i have now seem to be drifting away because i relate to them less and less or they have other more important people in their lives.whenever i try to do something better for myself,i feel as if i should have expectations of myself i will never achieve and i feel burdened and pressured so i give up.there are times i have hope for the future but at other times i feel that nothing will get better and that we all are truly alone in the end

the image is taken from reddit and is slightly modified by me.we need more doomerette memes man

No. 435666

Where did you get my photo from, Anon?

No. 435670

File: 1563355821526.jpg (41.92 KB, 300x300, doomerette.jpg)

the depths of my soul,fellow doomerette anon

No. 435673


No. 435688

File: 1563361287268.jpg (26.05 KB, 303x294, IMG_0203.JPG)

This entire post could've been written by me tbh; you summarized it all perfectly.
Hope you'll feel at least a bit better knowing you're really not the only one feeling like this.

No. 435695

File: 1563363900449.jpg (35.94 KB, 704x396, 1562021786969.jpg)

>Upstairs neighbor will bitch if anyone sneezes in the hallways.
>I live right under his apartment.
>He moves heavy shit around his apartment at 7AM.
>His grandchildren gallop around his apartment like draft horses.
>He slams doors like he is trying to break the door frames.
>Seriously beginning to tinfoil about what the eff he keeps dragging around on the floor at 7AM so often!?!?!!

No. 435696

op of the pic,i actually do feel a bit better seeing people relate to what i wrote(even tho the feeling sucks).keep holding on fellow doomerettes

No. 435703

>Seriously beginning to tinfoil about what the eff he keeps dragging around on the floor at 7AM so often!?!?!!
His grandkids

No. 435708

Just dropped my boyfriend and I realized how manipulative he is. He's always nonchalant about my worries and then backpedals and tries to blame me and he's also a liar. Oh and the kicker is that because I gave him a chance, he blamed me for leading him on. Garbage. Get the fuck over it dude

No. 435710

Did you drop him from someplace high at least?

No. 435711

this morning i was walking to work and i saw a license plate that read "why do i have to press 1 to get english?" the blatant racism in this town/state which is supposed to be "progressive" is rampant. It honestly makes my blood boil. These be the same people that go to foreign countries not knowing a lick of the language and expecting everyone to know english. The sad part is as americans we really can go to any part of the world and there will be at least one person in a shop/restaurant that knows english. Meanwhile in America we got these shit stains who think being accommodating to non english speakers is equivalent to mass genocide. I hate surburbia

No. 435712

Agree with you but not every place knows English. I’ve experienced this. Not really a huge deal tho

No. 435716

clearly that was a hyperbole. im mainly focused on how bold racists are lately. So it is a huge deal to me. people shouldnt have to feel unsafe or less than because they dont know a fucking language.

No. 435721

Lol anon. He told me it's not a mutual breakup so he wouldn't let go of me wtf…

No. 435737

That's stupid but doesn't make you a bold racist. And neither does it make non-English speakers unsafe. Isn't your official language English?
I never sympathized with Americans complaining about foreigners/mexicans, but since witnessing the situation first hand I kind of understand them. Tourists learn English, travel to the US, and then get people serving them who can't or can barely speak English? Wtf? Makes you feel dumbfounded lol

No. 435753

Really wonder if I'm bipolar or schizophrenic or that the whole medical team is just against me and want to put me on the (((drugs))), either way I'm not stupid enough to fall for them and take them.

No. 435755

I wish I wanted and liked kids and yearned for a family. I feel like I'm missing out by having 0 desire for it, and I especially feel like a failure for having no maternal instincts and not caring about children in the slightest. But the whole ordeal sounds like a nightmare. I have a decent life and a loving husband who is an introverted homebody like me, and I'm happy. But now that my friends and cousins are having kids and I just don't care at all, but I want to. It's frustrating. But as soon as they mention family shit I completely check out. But I don't want to become a bitter childfree hag that refers to kids as "crotchspawn" and wastes time hating them.

I guess I have a weird version of FOMO where I don't want the thing I'm missing out on but I want to want to be part of this thing that everyone seems to find great.

No. 435757

sounds like paranoid schizo thinking

No. 435763

Take your meds

No. 435771

I forgot I wrote that post but coming back and finding your reply makes me want to cry. Hang in there, kiddo. I'm proud of you.

Completely cutting someone out of your life is also a very valid way to deal with the trauma, too. I do live in fear of what will happen when my parents die and I may have to confront the person who abused me but then I remember that I can just talk to him through a lawyer. I haven't had any form of contact with that subhuman scum for 6 or 7 years now and every single extra day added to that number feels like a fucking achievement.

No. 435780

Just saw the photos of Biance Davis out in the open on Kiwi Farms, some people even tried to justify her murder. I fucking hate men. This situation makes me LIVID.

No. 435790

I know how you feel anon. I'm not even as deeply pink-pilled as other anons on this website but that situation makes me want to dive off the deep-end into full-on misandry when I read their shitty comments. Imagine being an adult human being and defending a murderer.

No. 435800

I feel like that but I also actually do feel like a doormat. I've noticed that I attract people like that too, maybe it's cause I'm too caring and I just attract the opposite.
I feel like I'm no one's priority really and when I'm with them it feels like they don't care that I'm there and when I do treat them the way they treat me suddenly I become the asshole. I don't know why…maybe i need to reflect on my personality or maybe I need new people around me.
I wish I could help you anon cause mine hits its peak too on some days. Distract yourself, go out and don't be alone for too long.