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New one since the old one is almost full.
Old Thread >>>/ot/195542
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I just lost my very expensive fitness class which I really like doing because I was trying to put music on my fucking phone but the pc kept giving me error messages and I just kep trying to do it and then I lost the bus.
I feel like a pathetic idiot.
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My SO and I are no longer sexually compatible and it's killing me. We already hardly flirt or do anything sexual anyway, but every time I try to talk about a new fetish or something to try to spice things up, they're against it or think it's dumb/not interesting.
They used to be so kinky. I don't know what changed. I will literally try ANY fetish besides shit-related stuff and it sucks that I have no one to do it with or even talk about with anymore. I wish my SO appreciated the fact that they could try anything/do anything to me and I'd probably love it.
Pic related, some kinky shit I'll never get to try
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I found some inappropriate pictures of my mom in her phone gallery that she took when I was just scrolling through to look at pictures from our trip over the weekend and I feel mortified. There's like 20 cleavage shots and also a really nasty one of her with kissy lips and cleavage and it just makes me sick to look at like I've lost major respect for her. There are people in their 20s who are mature enough to know these kinds of photos are distasteful. She's almost 50 and watching her act like a slutty teen is fucking disgusting and weird. Why can't she act her age if she's going to flirt around with guys?
Do you guys think I'm being too judgemental about the photos?
She's also an idiot who apparently borrowed 5,000 dollars TO this guy who she was fucking who I smelled from a mile away was treating her like shit. All they ever did when she visited him like once a month (he lives an hour away) was have sex and then sleep. He gave her an std too and now she has to go to the gynecologist. She pretty much paid someone she just met to give him monthly sex and paid for an std and surprise surprise, he doesn't want to pay her back. Then she bitches about how she's so poor and I'm the cause of it. She also told me that she did other stuff for him and when I asked her what, she wouldn't answer me which made me lose all trust for her. I don't know what's so bad that she won't tell her daughter.
I'm not sure what to think of her anymore. I just can't respect her if she has secrets and after knowing of her repulsive actions and behavior. All she ever does is ignore me too to text other people on her phone and post pictures of super mundane shit no one likes on her Facebook. I mean literally she took 8 pictures of our ceiling yesterday and we've been living here for 14 years. Nice to know Facebook and acting like a whore is more important than me. Fucking christ.
And I'm sorry if this got a little off track.
Two months ago I found an abandoned kitten. Maybe 10 days old. Barely living. I took it home even though he looked so bad I was scared to even touch him.
I fed him with milk every few hours, day and night. He lived. Even the vet was shocked, impressed.
Because he had lower immunity because of not being fed momma's milk, he got a little sick. Coughed sometimes, nothing serious, but we had to get him on antibiotics. He was getting better.
And then two days ago he refused to eat
He was still very lively and happy…
Yesterday he was too weak to play, not eating, vomiting.
Today he died on my arms
Few hours ago I still believed he could make it. He started drinking water, I fed him a bit, he was getting up to the litterbox. And then suddenly he was in agony. For about two hours I waited for him to die, unable to ease his pain.
I have no idea what happened. It was so fast and sudden. Two days ago we were playing… I can't believe it.
I'm so angry with the world, I don't think I will ever forgive it. It's so so unfair. I feel like a mother who lost her child, I honestly can't imagine getting myself together after this
Yeah, I'm sorry for your loss. The vet had to put down my lovable lab who was only 2 years old last month because he drank some antifreeze. I just completely lost it right there in the vet's office and when I tried to call my mom, she didn't believe it was me calling because I couldn't barely say anything through the tears.
If I ever get a pet again, it'll be a tortoise so it can outlive me.
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Do you ever feel like your friend is only friends with you to scout out hookups? My friend has become fuck buddys with two of my friends since I've known him and its wrecked the group dynamic entirely. I just want a normal friend group but no, he feels he needs to get his dick out and poke it in some holes. Doesn't help that he left the previous girl in the dark, asking for nudes when he was ringing my other friend everyday.
I hate the constant posts fuckbuddy 2 makes everyday about "missing u" and "i just cant be around him all the time im so sad" and whenever I hang out with them, they just don't want me there at all. I feel like one day I''l snap at them and let loose alot that I don;t mean. Im just frustrated and confused.
I know but… it hurts so much that I saved his life and managed to nurse him by myself from an infant to a kitten big enough to play and eat by itself and… he died so randomly, he was a strong, happy little cat. >>202838
sorry about your lab… seriously, why are pets so fragile.
If I could trade 50 years of my life just for him to live and be healthy, I would do it in an instant
On Sept 13, our yellow lab mix dog of 7 years passed away. It will be one year. The worst part is there was no saving him at the end.
For years we thought he had vertigo and just gave him ear medicine for infections, then over a week he suddenly stopped eating, could barely get up, his eyes drooping bad. We had to wait an entire weekend to get to a real vet and by then he was legit bones. The moment we got to the vet he started throwing up, having whole body seizures and death groaning. He passed in my partners arms. What was worse or I guess for the good, Thunder(the dog)'s sister was in the room too. I stood in the corner closing my eyes because I couldn't bare to watch his last moments.
The vet said just from seeing his symptoms she was positive he had brain cancer.
I'm not looking forward to next month.
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I've always dreamed about living in a pink cottage. Even a regular pink wooden house would be fine. However the older I get the more I realize how stupid that dream is. It will never happen and that really depresses me in a way.
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I keep having thoughts about quitting and walking out on my shit job and have once again started talking to my close friends about quitting. It all around makes me depressed because the shit I deal with for not even $9/hr frustrates me to tears, but looking at job postings and thinking how the college diploma I just got is worth nothing and if I quit now I face becoming a NEET when I now have financial obligations.
I was ready to go in tomorrow and leave my 2 weeks notice but I wish I wasn't here anymore, how will that feeling change if I can't find an actual career-type job? It's so stupid how I'm so hesitant to leave when I get paid so little and hate what I do.
As least you have the useless piece of paper degree.
Look for a job on the side, and depending on how they've been treating you, don't even put your two weeks in. Though from my own experience at $7.90 / hr, the problem is the customers and not the coworkers.
I would like to dedicate this next vent to the Illuminati, the lizard-people, the globalists, the Jews, or whoever actually controls the world economy:
Please, please, make my stock go up. Pls. I'm already almost three hundred under and three hundred mLs of 80-proof in. Trump is still president, but enough people (and sadly enough farmers) are stuck in wageslave jobs that you can manage that.
Also is there a way I can record just audio on my webcam? Was thinking of giving some OC to the vocaroo thread.
My friend, her boyfriend (of 2-3 months, lives in a different city so they see each other like once a week) and me went out on Saturday, got a bit drunk in the park and then my friend had a breakdown. Full on crying (and then laughing), lying in the middle of the road, I even had to tackle her to the ground so she wouldn't jump in front of a car. She's been mentally unwell (ED and psychologically abusive parents, mostly mother) for quite some time now, but she hasn't yet told her bf the details.
While we were trying to calm her down and get her home, her boyfriend told me he wants to talk to me later about her.
So now he's messaged me on facebook and wants to talk about what's going on. I guess he wants me to tell him the details about what's going on, or at least confirm what he's thinking (he has a hunch about her ED, I guess, and he already knows her mother is a piece of shit).
I'm not sure what to do. Do I tell him what I know? Do I tell my friend? Do I tell my friend, not tell the bf I told her, and share with him only what she wants me to share?!
I've never been in this situation before and I'm completely lost.
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There was blood in my piss the other day. Thought I was just starting my period, but it turned out to be a fucking uti… I hate the pain, I hate having to piss every 5 seconds, I hate that said piss is neon orange because of the medicine, and I hate my life.
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thats really not okay. your friend can really potentially be in the hands of a predator..
is their relationship long distance? or you and your friends? cus if its theirs, itd be even weirder to think that he could be making up lies to woo her..
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tfw u send a risky message and dont get a response and regret it and wish u never said anything but its too late and
hm, having dated a guy with a bit of a scandalous age gap (started dating when I was 15 and he was 18, we're still together and happy and shit) you have to look for the signs that he's with her for her age, where I'm from 16 yr olds dating 21 yr olds is nothing new and isn't that big of a deal since its the age of consent and all
but some signs are
>he doesn't feel bad about the age gap or is worried about other people thinking
>he often grooms her, getting her into bdsm or other stuff like that
>he wants her to look younger than she actually is
>having fetishes such as ddlg, he wants her to act like a little girl, make her call him nicknames for him to assert "dominance"
>he likes if she looks younger than she actually is
>he gets overprotective, wants her to isolate herself, doesnt trust her when she goes out
>he accuses her of cheating a lot for no reason
>she's naive, impressionable
>they move too fast (sending nudes after a month, saying I love you after a week, talking about marrying etc etc)
if he starts being creepy towards her, the last thing you should do is leave her alone, teach her whats right and whats wrong, but do it in a knowledgeable sane way, don't call her up or whatever and say "he's only with you because you're young and naive!" it will just make her want to rebel, gather up facts and sources, explain to her what's going on, and tell her what might happen, tell her the signs, suggest to her what she might do in that situation, but trying to get her to quit cold turkey will never be good for either of you, don't back away, just explain to her, stay with her, and sometimes if nothing else works, you have to just be a listening and helper, until something serious (rape, physical abuse, black mailing, etc) happens or they actually break up
>>203008>let's say someone is talking some shit about "white people having no culture" it sounds like those people forget that most Europeans are white too but we actually have different cultures.
well, there's your answer. it's usually minorities who aren't well-read that say something like this but continue to celebrate white pagan originated holidays such as christmas and easter. or basically any us celebrated holiday lol.
>ya'll think that there is nothing important outside of the US and that the US is superior to every other country because muuh freedom, guns and fast food.
are you living in the south? this sounds like a grossly exaggerated stereotype and a lot of your post sounds like shit you've made up in your head, like most angry euros tend to do when bitching about america.
i dont see the problem with someone saying they're proud of their heritage regardless of if they speak that language or have been there or whatever. that just sounds like a personal pet peeve.
>boyfriend is growing increasingly distant>might just be my imagination, though>i can never tell what he's thinking>talking leads nowhere, he's dumb as bricks when it comes to emotions
I've lied, led on, and fucked people over so many times I started to expect it to happen to me too. It never did, but I still think it will. Trying to stay rational is proving very, very difficult. >>203023
No, I was reading the relationship advice thread and didn't check /g/'s front page.
>>203025>like most angry euros tend to do when bitching about america.
NAYRT but that's annoying too. There are places other than america and europe, but whenever someone mentions "dumb americans" the response is always "lol butthurt yuros".
Also, SJW shit is hitting people wherever there's internet connection, regardless of whether or not the place's culture or people is similar to the US. I get people spouting "whites have no culture" all the way down here in my south american shithole. It's that bad.
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yeah i did
what the fuck man>>203037>half naked
more like fully naked, shit was gross tbh
I really feel like there's something wrong with me, like for the past maybe 7-10 years.
I think it's depression but I don't want to self diagnose, the best way I can describe it is this:
>every month, maybe 2, I feel sluggish, just robot going through the motions, no real sadness or happiness like everything instead of being on a scale from 1-10, is 1-2.
>but then every so often that kind of feeling lifts off and I feel full of energy and it seems like I see everything more brighter as well.
there's way too much shit wrong and I can only vent about it anonymously, too much to fix.
sort of feels like I'm silently drowning but gotta keep up a normal front for everyone.
everyone time I get close to checking out, something creeps up to stop me, like looking after a friend or someone else needing help.
I think if it turned out that the past 8-10 years where I've felt this way and felt like a loser turn out to not be the case and I could of been happy would feel even worse.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXKLqVCz8SA
I know that this is exaggerated I was (mostly) talking about people on the internet.
As I said, I have lived in the US I know how some people there are like.
And yes they are not the way I made them look like but it still amazes me that almost everyone I met didn't give a shit about what's going on outside of the US.
I vented so yeah I exaggerated a looot.
And no, I'm not from the South.
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Did it look like this?
Out of everything in my life that should have done me in by now, I fall apart over a man. Not drugs, not mental health issues, I genuinely don't know what I'll do without him.
Everything in my life, this house, MY PC FFS, is a constant reminder of him. I thought this was it, he'd stay my funny, handsome, intelligent and charming lad. I'm replaceable garbage.
I know this will stop hurting, but right now, I just want to scream until my lungs burst.
No way to diagnose over the web, or like by yourself, of course, but your symptoms sound like mine, and I have a form of depression called recurrent brief depression (rbd), it's kinda like a bipolar lite if you will. Depressive episodes for me last about 3-4 days (majorly depressed) often, almost always followed by a day or two of vast energy, brighter outlook and a need to get out and do something, anything! Move all my furniture around! Get stuff done!!! After that follows a normal ish month. Dx criteria is for it not to be linked with your period. Meds helped a lot. Therapy too.
It took the bigger part of a year to get dx'ed bc they had to rule out bipolar, but knowing what this is was worth it. Polite sage for… mental health ramblings
I don't know if my advice would be helpful but I'll try! I studied the same as you and I finished this year when I was supposed to finish last year. As you, people told me (and still tell me) that it'll be hard to find a job that I like and that I'd should desperate search for something.
I know it's hard. It's hard because people is worrying about your future and you worry too and in my personal experience that brought me a lot of anxiety and pressure. During my second year I started wondering if what I was studying motivated me. Sometimes it's hard because we can't like all the subjects, in fact, some of them seem pointless.
>I'd like to have something I know I'm good at, but I really suck at maths and am not really gifted in general.
I quoted you because I think almost the same about me, sometimes I feel like I'm not -too- good at all.
One of my friends always compared me to him and not in a good way. I mean, he was -and still- always asking what I'd do with my life, when I'll get a job, etc., just because he thinks that people must be always reaching for something bigger, something important, that if you don't have a purpose in life you're ''worthless'. As I said, this brought me a lot of anxiety because I started to think he was kind of right and I second-guessed myself all the time. Was I that worthless? Would I ever find a job? What if I have chose the wrong path?
One day my anxiety was that bad, that I had to change my mind for good. It's obvious people is going to worry about our future, but that doesn't have to be a reason to make us fear what the future may bring. They're not us, they won't have to work for us, they won't even have to search a job for us! Life happens as it happens and - in my case - had to end my studies this year, I haven't found a job yet and I'm trying, that's what's important right now.
My advice is that you should try to not put too much pressure on you. Try to concentrate on those subjects which you like and think how far you've become, even if it seems too little, it's better than nothing. Try to focus on yourself and hink about why you started social studies in first place, what you wanted to archieve by doing this.
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This might be better suited for the move abroad thread, but fuck, I hate the expat bubble. I hate how fucking unreliable and whiny (lol ironic) other foreign immigrants are in my city. They're nice but that's all they've got going for them. Not a single one of them can show up on time to shit they arrange or agree on, they have no hobbies other than getting shitfaced, and they complain about being poor and then blow all their money on beer.
I'm so glad I'm making friends with locals.
wrong, cups<<tampons<<<<<reusable pads<<<disposable pads>>203101
maybe if you're 10 or you're into ABDL, smelly
Or you know, maths, because that's where < and > come from.
I've never tried cups, but I prefer tampons to pads.>>203099
Where do you live?
I'm not a huge fan of the expat bubble either, but sometimes it's good to hang out with people from my country. Unfortunately it's pretty complicated (to me) to make friends with locals, but I'm finally doing something outside of work with one of my workmates, so let's see how that works out.
I'm just pissed because I get pressure from my partner to be more responsible when I think I'm already adulting pretty well.
Got a job => Get a permanent contract
Saving 500$ per month => Save more or we'll be poor after we retire
Like could you just back down a bit, we're both not that old yet, we'll be fine…
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I wish I was born male so badly. I'm not transgender and I don't have body dysmorphia, but I just… I don't know? I never cared much for my gender identity and I was always comfortable doing both "girl" and "boy" stuff. But… lately I'm realizing how much I want to be a man - not in a transgender way though, but born and raised as one. Even though girls are beautiful, I appreciate the male body aesthetic much more and I'd love to have a muscly masculine bod. I would feel much more comfortable both looking and dressing as a man, even though being a girl doesn't really bother me that much. It's like - being a female feels alright to me, but the idea of me being male makes me excited and happy. Is this just my dissasociative disorder kicking in again? Is this just a weird phrase in my life? I want it to stop. It makes me so unbelievably dissatisfied and restless.
I live in Central Europe but I'm from the states. It's nice to meet people from my state/the US, so I know what you mean, but the large group of people we hang out have been grating my nerves for awhile. Some of them are great, but they're the ones who are constantly jetting off to the their home countries or taking trips so I never see them. The people who do stick around just drive me nuts sometimes.
I'm lucky I'm in a niche hobby (lolita) and made some friends this way. I taught ESL for adults for awhile so I stayed in contact with students who wanted to hang out outside of lessons.
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bait harder robot, you're going to die alone
Fucking short guys are always giving me shit as if I've personally wronged them by being tall. The pretentious little fuck heads; always talking themselves up and trying to start fights with anyone taller than they are.
Has anyone ever fucked a short guy who wasn't a complete wanker?
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i can hardly stand to look at the munchie thread because it makes me so fucking frustrated. the person i'm closest to finally got tested positive an extremely painful extremely rare chronic condition that's fatal if left untreated, and it's been years without a diagnosis so it's uncomfortably close to the fatal stage. he's been side eyed by so many doctors and even told to get checked for munchausen, and the fucking munchies cling to conditions like this because it's so difficult to test positive for in a way where it doesn't usually get picked up by standard testing. i can't help but wonder if if it weren't for munchie behavior being common, would he have gotten a diagnosis sooner and thus be able to treat it when its not close to the fatal stage. I know that might not be a case so it's not helpful to wonder but shit. I just don't know what we did wrong where fucking munchies can get access to things that people in constant agony can't. I guess not enough crying and #warrior rhetoric maybe.
Hey anon, you might be going through a tough time now, but never blame it on the fact that you're still a virgin; that has nothing to so with it and is definatly not the cause of your worries, so never ever give your first time away to some dude you barely know!
One of my friends made the stupid mistake, thinking that when she and that guy will be dating; two day later we caught him with another girl and that's something that truely nobody deserves…
Does he make you feel unimportant?
If its not him, maybe you need to do something that makes you stop thinking about him all the time, do you have some good friends you can chill with?
Also talk to him about how your feeling.
Well, I guess I am mad about it now. I was calm yesterday because I kept myself busy and didn't mind he wasn't there to talk to. If I can't sit and think about it, I'm fine. If I stop and ponder, I dwell and get angrier.
But today I woke up and just got a quick message and looked on discord to see he was at the pub 4 hours after he woke up. He stayed there for 3 hours and then left for after drinks at someone's house it's been almost 5 hours there.
I'm annoyed because it's like.. look, dude. I work, I go to school, my schedule is set and defined and we only have a few hours a day that we can talk. If he doesn't wake up (like last night) we don't talk. If he stays out past midnight (like today) his sleep schedule is ruined and we can't talk as much, or if at all, because he sleeps in as a result.
Once he gets off schedule, our entire pattern gets fucked and I usually end up waking up at 4am to get some time to talk before work. He doesn't ask me to, I do it because I miss him and want to chat but it still impacts my life heavily to do it. If I don't wake up at 4, and instead at 6, I get a few messages in before he sleeps at 6:30-7am because he's usually watching videos or playing games with friends.
I just get frustrated because he doesn't have responsibilities like I do. I'm studying right now to leave to teach overseas in like, 6 months. My life is stressful and needs to keep a routine thing. His life is footloose and fancy free.
I'm probably super salty about that, he has no bills to pay, no job, no school, can wake and sleep whenever he wants but I'm drowning in debt and trying to keep as positive as I can.
dont get offended because someone pointed out that you stated the obvious.
im a recovering alcoholic and i will always consider myself recovering even if i havent consumed anything in years. its an addiction. im pretty sure we all would give looks to a crack head who picks up the pipe after 5 years of sobriety because it was their crutch. so why is it different. its playing with fire to go back to something that you did all day everyday even for just a little taste.
just take that experience as proof that yea, it could easily get out of hand>it wasnt supposed to go like this
youre aware of how shitty the situation was, youre clearly shamed, so use that energy and funnel it into being more aware next time if you still feel the need to say yes to a drink.
i know i can go through a handle of vodka asap, and i know in the right situation when all conditions are met that i can drink two shots and stop but id rather not risk fucking myself up again.
if you feel safe approaching that topic with him and still have residual negativity, it could be worth it. if your social/sexual health is compromised and you feel like working through the issues with the source of the pain it could help.
it sucks feeling chained to the past because of someone else.
Oh shit, sis. I don't know if I have any advice to give you, but years ago, I went through the exact. Same. Thing. LDRs are tough as it is: now add in adult responsibilities, feeling unappreciated, different timezones, schedules(also, it sounds like you're putting a fuckton of effort into this relationship; is he as well?), and you have a recipe for daily/weekly fights and resentment.
I remember thinking "well, he's happy, I guess I'll try to let go of these angry feelings I have since he's sick of talking about it."
You sound like you have a lot on your plate right now, Anon. If you've told him before that you'd welcome a little more attention or messages or simple gestures he cares, you might need to focus more on yourself and wellbeing.
He's horribly depressed right now, so that makes it hard for him to want to do anything but he does try to put effort into our relationship. even if it's sitting on a skype call while he plays games or watches something, he makes an effort to be present in my life. He even listens to me ramble about work or something I found interesting even if he doesn't know what I'm talking about.
I fully believe he loves/cares about me, so there's no doubt on that end. I think his depression and my stress are a recipe for trouble. I sometimes put too much pressure on our relationship in terms of gestures I think, but he is also forgetful and selfish. After all, we are still young.
Money is a huge problem for me as well, he's grown up poor and so have I, but I've worked really hard these last two years to earn money and keep it. But lately debts have been coming on faster than my paychecks and I've been diving headfirst into my savings without being able to put anything back in.
I think once I can land this new job, my life will be a lot clearer. I'll be earning the same monthly salary at only half the hours, which leaves me enough time to earn cash on the side. I think I just have to keep my head above water long enough to see the ships come in.
Thank you anons for listening to me ramble.
Thank you anon, I guess at this age I don't really care anymore I just want to get it done so I can have a healthy sex life since it's ruined quite a few previous relationships.
But the fwb guy messaged me again today saying how he wants me to come over for the day thing is he lives 3 hours away which is a crazy way for me to travel to only see him for a few hours and even then I think he just wants a booty call. Which is something I dont do.
And even after all of this he messaged saying how he wants to call off meeting me because he "isnt in the right headspace" and feels depressed. So I have no idea what's going through his mind at the moment.
I read a book similar to that called "Welcome to the NHK"
The book, manga, and anime are entirely different (book goes into more of the depraved/illegal stuff he did).
Is that it?
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>started new job last week
>work around a kitchen dealing with the worst customers for 10 bucks an hour
>manager notice my shoes arent proper non-slip trainers
>"anon you should've known the dress code before you turned in your employment sheets. did you not read the manual?"
>knew i needed non-slip shoes but was hoping no one would notice
>hoping this because my mom would freak out about having to buy me new shoes for work so i couldnt tell her
>decide to finally tell her because manager is now on my ass about it
>she makes a big deal about having to spend money on me, like i expected
>tells me to grab my "nigger Filas" from the closet
>theyre not even my shoes, theyre her old ones she used to wear and they are even in her old size
>theyre a size 7, way too fucking big for my feet
>try them on in front of her and you can clearly see my heels popping out of them
>"well then why did you ask me to buy a size 7 for you when we got those?"
>bitch what, theyre yours and i would never ask for a size 7 considering ive only ever been a 4-5
>"im not going to argue with you! maybe you shouldve asked for the right size"
>shes not going to buy me new shoes
>waiting for my manager to ream my ass, get rid of me, and my mom to blame me for losing my job
and theres no way i can buy new non slips on my own because my mom doesnt want me buying anything and gets pissed when i use my credit card. she checks that shit religiously
youre right. i really need this job so im just going to use my card and suck up whatever punishment she gives me even though shes brutal as fuck. i just dont know why she gets upset when i use it because everything on the card is money ive saved up from my previous jobs anyway. >>203422
thanks for the suggestion. this is a good idea and i totally would do this so maybe she would rage less when she sees the charge was only 5 bucks or something but theres no thrift stores in my area!
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You really need to go to the bank and set up your own account asap.
One of my friends is fat and I couldn't care less except for the fact that he always - and I mean - always, has to complain about everything I eat or how much exercise I do just when he's dieting or exercising. It gets on my nerves. Specially when it's evident he weights -at least- 20 lbs more than me.
He always has an excuse for his weight, and no, it's not an hormonal thing, it's not because of his complexion, it's not because some medication or something like that (it wouldn't even bother me if it was). It's just that he eats crap all the time and too much of it. And as I said, I couldn't care less. His body, his life, his rules.
Now he's claiming he's almost vegan because he decided not to eat meat and eats all the different types of rice or vegetables he doesn't like. I'm glad he's trying to be better in this aspect, it's just that when I claim I preffer burguers over fish, or veggies, he actually LAUGHS at me for it. He shames me for my laziness when it comes to do any exercise, but he'll always have and excuse for justifing him not doing anything and he'll claim ''it's not the same''.
aw anon, did you delete your post because >>203480
was a bit mean? lol don't take it too seriously, we're anonymous here and no one really cares.
Its gonna be okay anon, i was in ascension parish during the 2016 flood and holy shit I lost EVERYTHING, its normal to have anxiety, im in storm zone too but not too far away, but if you're in South Houston you should not get that much, but also some tips are to preserve everything you want to keep, i wish i could have told myself this before the flood because I lost all of my school year books, memories, books, video games and some toys, also bring as much clothes and household items as you can, I can't tell you enough how hard it was finding soap, shampoo, face wash, etc that wasnt sold out
Also have a back up plan do you have any friends and family not in hurricane zone?
Why are you trying to be friends with them?
Many of my friends have very different values, such as one of my friends is vegetarian and another is obsessed with spiritual stuff. But even when we disagree, we try to be respectful about it. I'd probably cut ties if anyone actually laughed at someone for not sharing their viewpoint. >>203458
All you can do is increase your own value or settle at the end of the day. If someone argues otherwise they're trying to sell you something.
iirc in the books he was. the show is completely different.
that series is fucking awful in general. it needed to end like 5 years ago
About 6 months ago I let a friend of 15 years manipulate me into moving in. 2 months ago again, allowed myself to be manipulated into signing the lease. The only space in the house that has any of my belongings is my room and a shelf in the bathroom. The rest of everything else belongs to my roommate. Recently, I received a text "I'm going to say this once more. I don't feel like you want to contribute to the house including its cleanliness and safety. This is from more than just eclipse prep and week. I think we need consider if you really want to live here at all. The way you act at home affects everyone in it. It causes both of us stress we don't need and I don't think we are compatible as roommates. We should talk about this in person sooner rather than later. "
To me, that sounds like - you're incompetent and I want you to move out. So I responded basically - I'll do me, you do you.. I'll try and look for another place to live but I'm broke and you know that.
I come home the next day to all of the gifts I've given over the years set in front of my door and a list of 12 household rules - including labeling food I put in the fridge on the shelf that was just cleaned out, keeping the toilet lid down, and cleaning parts of the house I've NEVER used weekly.
I understand that my roommate is frustrated at me keeping to myself in my room. And even turning the worst anxiety attack I've ever had, lasting hours and having the paramedics called I was so scared, into a personal slight against my roommate. I never asked to be cleaned up after and left to my own devices I do clean up after myself, just not in a timely enough manner I guess.
Now, the SO and SO's dog are there…likely to intimidate me. The SO has a history of violence when drunk…and is usually plastered…has threatened me and made me feel uncomfortable in my own home. The SO's dog attacks mine all the time and, while my dog is bigger, I'd my dog were to retaliate and hurt the little dog it would be my dog's fault.
Now I'm stuck in a hell of my own making, living with someone that believes themselves to be better than me and trys to control me… And it's all my fault the friendship was ruined and everything else is my fault too.
when I was 16 and pll came out I had the biggest crush on ezra, I still do anyway, but he is portrayed in a way where aria lied about her age , so he assumed she was around his age and fell for her, hence why he couldn't stay away when the truth was revealed, as well as when he went for allison when she also lied about her age, but most of the other women in the show he has been with were all around his age , his attraction never really seemed villainous to me because it's not like aria or allison were wayyyyy younger like 11-12, and they could both pass for adults, and in some places like the uk, russia, canada, some states in the USA, the age of consent is 16, in pennsylvania, people between the ages of 13-16 can be with someone as long as ig they are not more than 4 yrs older than them
this may be kinda biased coming from me though, since I dated an 18 yr old at 15 and I'm still with him (I'm 18)
yeah, you're definitely biased. i dated an 18y.o when i was 15 and its creepy because hes an adult and i was a child
Ezra is straight up a fucking creep, the bottom line is that Aria is a child, and he is an adult with authority. She never lied about her age either, he should know better
Also spoiler alert omg i didnt know ezra dated ali !!!! im only on season 2
Wut, she lied about her age when they first met, or manipulated it to make it seem that she was older, when they were talking about going to college aria said "im leaning toward english" when talking about her major
I honestly don't think 15 and 18 is THAT bad, but it could definitely be suspicious, since in most places 16 is the age of consent its only one yr off until they reach that age maybe less, putting it in high school terms, its like when an average freshman or sophomore dates a senior, 3 yrs isnt that much, and 18 is legally an adult but keep in mind 15 and 18 is still teenagers and theyre both as hormonal and angsty as any other teenager
However, i think in situations where this would be bad is when its clear that the person like the teen for the sole reason because they're young, not if they actually liked them, and if they like if the 14-17 yr old already looks like a child then yes its reaching pedo territory, however, if the 15+ yr old looks older than they are or like a normal person of that age, and someone thats 18 likes them and dates them because their personality and stuff then I dont see why its a big deal
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>used to get constipated during my period
>this time I can't stop shitting watery stools every three hours and I constantly feel like I'm going to shart my pants
I want to fucking die, I'd take the latter over this any day
I saw my grandfather go through this and dementia as well.
Horrifying stuff that depresses me and worries me for my parents and for my future spouse or children or whatever. I am terrified of nursing homes because of the memories they bring. Just writing this gets me a little choked up.
I'm so sorry anon. This stuff is hard, And mysterious, And unforgiving. Please try your best to continue on. I know it breaks your heart, but he loved you, he still does, it's in there somewhere. Don't let your memories of him go to waste.
That's because they're going completely on their own now. They can't help but start veering towards the usual way of TV storytelling and make the good guys super, awesome wonderful special snowflake. They did make some very interesting decisions up until now but it's pretty obvious how the story is going to go.
GRRM needs to stop swimming around in his money like a fat Scrooge McDuck and finish The Winds of Winter and get on A Dream of Spring already. That's why the show was so great in the first place, they adapted from the books and the books had a lot of really interesting surprises and changes in events.
I'm so sorry, Anon. My grandpa is in a similar state. I hadn't seen him in ~4 years and he didn't remember me or my dad when we visited him last month. It was awful for the both of us… but even more so for my dad, even though he had a difficult time admitting it hurt because of his bullshit man-pride.
What's bad is that we both expected to be forgotten due to infrequent visits… but neither one of us really wanted to accept the truth of it.
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I agree, I love this series and I'm actually so bummed out that this is the direction the show is going.
A lot of the characters have become caricatures of themselves. Like they took what people liked about them and made that their entire character. Arya was always a badass but she was also just a kid and really relatable. Now she's just this flawless, impossibly strong, completely insufferable psycho. And they can't go one episode without the Hound saying cunt or someone talking about cocks. It's so fucking annoying. It's become so bro-y.
At this point I'd rather Cersei stays on the throne or the Night King kills everyone.
true, I feel like the series is not what it used to be and the reason is they are not able to go after the books anymore but go awol.
There story itself is still okay, but everything seems so fabricated. SPOILER OF GAME OF THRONES AHEADjust like jon snow ridiculously trying to fight of 100.000 white walkers by himself, only so they can justify why one of the dragons is killed and that the night's king can get a dragon to pass the wall. Like okay, but why had the situation to be so ridiculously stupid? Or Jon Snow and Dany… "BOOM WERE FUCKING NOW"Or how they killed of or send away all of the dire wolves from the stark family "because we couldnt have portraited them accordingly" more like bitch you didnt want to spend more budget on themCersei starts to become my favourite character too afterall because at least she is still that crazy cunt that she is.
I just hope the last season doesnt become as shit as the recent one.
>>203670>GRRM needs to stop swimming around in his money like a fat Scrooge McDuck and finish The Winds of Winter and get on A Dream of Spring already.
first of I think it's too late for that. Iirc the last season will come out in around 2 years.
He would need to have the story finished by now so it could be published or at least used for pre-production.
But if the books were ready, the producers of the series wouldve used it. >>203669>I hate Jon Snow
I agree. He became a boring twat. I couldnt even think of a way to make him more interesting again.
This is only a fan theory, but I think Daenerys will have become pregnant from the one fuck they had, and Jon Snow wont touch her again, after hearing the news about her being his aunt. The series will end with Jon snow being the new night king. Like it is either a curse and he has to take the night's kings place after killing him, OR, the night's king kills him but dying doesnt turn him into a white walker because of whatever reasons, but into something like Benjen stark and he will then proceed to lead on the white walker army beyond the wall, causing him a life in lonelyness north of the wall, all alone, far from anyone else. The son of him and Dany then proceeds to take the throne, after they kicked Cersei off. Or better yet: Their son and Cerseis daughter marry and thats how they "defy" her.
I know nothing though and this is pure speculation and wild fan theory.
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Cersei has remained the most consistent character and has actually grown some too. Not into some bullshit Marysue/Garystu either. All hail Queen Cersei!
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THERE MUST ALWAYS BE A LICH KING :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
It basically HAS been fanfiction since after season 1. Season 2 is when they started ignoring certain canon material.
This era of romanticism needs to fucking die. There's no such thing as ~~TWU WUV~~ It's all chemicals in your brain telling you how to feel. Love in a relationship is hard work. I get that TV is supposed to be escapism, but it really just adds to the harmful narrative.
Are you kidding? Rhaegar is a dreamboat. Specially now we know he's not a rapist.
Anyway, the Aegon thing means they really ditched the young Griff arc for good. I'm pretty disappointed.
Rhaegar not raping Lyanna is only confirmed in the series, so it isn't cannon.
Regardless, he left his family to be tortured by his father, he was a terrible father and even worse husband. If there is something he isn't is "dreamboat".
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>>203779>Rhaegar is a dreamboat. Specially now we know he's not a rapist.
Not raping people is not a quality you should brag about or be proud of really.
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>tfw I type out a huge vent but then delete it partly bc it's out of my system but also partly bc I'm paranoid that the bitches I mention may browse here and know who I am bc the vent is so specific
Oh well, I can least vent about my soul-sucking job that made me cry tonight, right?
I work at a call center. Side story is that despite making me miserable, it has a lot of perks, benefits, and is also a globally recognized brand.
I'm a peon who makes a shit wage but everyone thinks I have this exciting, professional job just bc of the brand I work for and the romanticizations of what I (don't) actually do. I'm too insecure to leave it out of fear that I won't find something better.
On top of that, there's a lot of unprofessionalism/incompetence/lack of training among my coworkers–namely from 'resolution' agents that act as my 'supervisors' on the phone when I need help with something.
Tonight I got stuck in a 2 hour call that went an hour over my shift end time. All because I was getting inconsistent, condescending 'help' from these 'resolution' twats. Low key I was working on something super complicated, and they didn't want to deal with it personally bc they're lazy shits. I sound young and nice over the phone, so many tend to brush me aside and think they can treat me as if I'm a naive dumbass–whatever it takes to get me off their line.
Anyway, what should have been a 30 minute call turned into 2 hours just because I had to keep making calls back and forth to verify/change certain information–partially the fault of the indecisive customer and her weird requests–but mostly because the resolution agents gave me wrong info.
I further got stuck with a financial agent who thought they had the fucking authority to act like a supervising agent when their only job was to calculate a number and store the information in the record I was working in. I may report that to my actual supervisor because holy shit that made me pissed. Considering the agent was fucking wrong anyway and wasted my time with her own little proofread of the work that already passed by THREE FUCKING RESOLUTION AGENTS.
And did I mention: That the time I'm on hold with the customer while these bumbling pricks don't listen to me, fuck with irrelevant shit, and go off on tangents actually negatively impacts MY agent stats?
I had another dipshit resolution agent earlier in my shift who could barely be assed to submit a detailed receipt request for a customer. Just because that would have required him to make three pseudo records and queue it to a desk that does the work for him, oh no!
He tried to play fucking dumb when I came on the line and said that his position doesn't do detailed receipts (they fucking do). He said, "Well good luck with that" when I said the customer needed a more detailed receipt than what could be provided on the website.
He eventually did it, but it pisses me off that he was a lying fucknut about it and tried to get me to hang up by stalling my time for 15 minutes when it only should have taken him 5. Son of a bitch.
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I can only work two days a week at my job because of college and I'm already feeling the financial crush. At first I thought it'd be a good thing to help wean me out of working there but now I need to find a place that can accommodate my weird schedule.
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>mfw I can't tell if the employees whispered about me or something else
>mfw she treated the customer before me in a completely different way
>mfw I walked out of the store and happened to see her colleague smiling at me through the window
Maybe I'm just being paranoid today. Maybe she gossiped because I didn't wear make-up and haven't washed my hair in four days lol. I just wanted to get my glasses corrected but I swear, she talked shit behind my back to her colleague who then followed me out of the store with her eyes for whatever reason.
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I'm just about done here. I've been wanting to kill myself for years but I've always been too scared and proactive enough to choose a method out of fear that it wouldn't "work." I don't have access to firearms or anything like that (but even if I did I would be scared that I would aim wrong and just end up alive with permanent damage.) I'll never contribute anything the world and there's just no point to me being here. I really wish I was a different person with a different brain.
I still don't know what method I'm going to use but I feel like I'm finally angry/sad/tired enough to just go through with it regardless of pain and fear. I don't want to set a specific date or anything but I'd like to live through one more fall season because I've always found it very comforting and I only have good memories of that time of year.
It's funny because when I was 18 I tried to kill myself with hydrocodone. I don't remember how many I took but I just ended up waking up the next day vomiting nothing and not being able to pee for two days, but I just told my parents I was sick and they never found it. Didn't have to go to the hospital or anything. It was very stupid of me BUT I think about it all the time because in the five years since that happened, nothing has changed. Nothing happened in these five years that I would have 'missed out on' if I had died at 18. So it's really a shame that it didn't work back then but I was stupid and had no idea what I was doing. That makes me saddest of all.
I know how you feel too anon.
I had an attempt when I was 20 which landed me in the hospital and then the psych ward. I had been depressed for years before this, self harming and had an ED.
Ended up being diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder like 3 years later on my next admission to the psych ward (also due to suicidal thoughts etc.) Left my job with my shitty abusive boss and started intensive therapy (MBT once a week for like a year) and eventually started getting my shit together.
I'm now starting medical school in a couple of weeks which is something I thought I would never achieve after years and years of being miserable.
I'm now 25, I just wanted to say things can change, I never thought I would achieve any of my goals and I'm finally starting to. If you haven't been inpatient or had therapy it is worth a try, it changed my life.
I don't know much about you but your post struck a nerve with me because it's very similar to how I felt a few years ago and you're style of writing is somewhat similar to my own so I just wanted to say that I never thought things would change and they have, and they could for you too, its no longer painful to live all the time.
I hope this doesn't piss you off, I'm not sure I would have been receptive to a comment like mine when I felt them same as you.
sage for blogposting
Well, I didn't say it to a friend who lost their home- I said it to a rich friend who lives in a mcmansion, who decided to bring her up for whatever reason. It would be different if I was publicly posting it all over social media or something similar.>>203623
Fuck, this is me too and its worse during classes/a job because you can only leave so many times before people get pissed off at you.
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Just break up with him and go do what you have to do. If you really want to die, get this dude squared away before you fuck him up.
I don't think suicide is selfish, but it is if you do it knowing someone is going to have to deal with the aftermath.
I don't see why they had to jump up your ass about it. It's flooded here on days it rains with partial sun.
Weather preference has literally nothing to do with who was and wasn't affected by the hurricane, it sounds like they were just looking for something to be offended by.
Are any of them volunteering to help flood victims? Made any donations? Attended any fundraisers? Housing people/pets who were displaced? No?
If they were actually concerned, maybe they should be doing something to help their friend instead of getting mad at you for attempting a little mundane commiseration.
Fuck them and fuck the sun, too
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>>203919>it is if you do it knowing someone is going to have to deal with the aftermath.
Which is basically every fucking time. You don't think he'd be affected if he learned she killed herself a month after they broke up?
What she needs is a fucking therapist and address why she wants to kill herself, Suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem.
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>you write for a website, share your new article you're pretty proud of on fb
>meanwhile on your feed girl writes that she doesn't want to go to school tomorrow
What am I doing wrong? Sometimes it's as if Facebook doesn't show my stuff on people's feed. I have friends irl, but I'd like to have more of a following on social media because in moments like these it feels like talking to a wall. How do you build a following?
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I've been on the fence of breaking up with my bf for months now. Too much drama happens and then I feel bad for him and stick around, but I'm really getting tired of everything. I don't want to go into too much detail but I basically feel like some housemaid that he occasionally wants to fuck. We've been together for about 9 years so this is pretty tough to deal with but I can't take it anymore.
This past week I've been mentally cataloging everything in our place that's mine. Things I brought with me when we moved in together, things I bought that only I use, or things that were gifted by my parents (who hate him btw). It's going to suck a lot because any furniture I had when we moved in is basically gone now as we bought new furniture together. It feels like I'm going to be starting from scratch, just like when I moved out on my own for the first time
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i'm really starting to hate people and the older i get, the more i 'm turned off by having any sort of friendship or relationship with anybody. this could be my ptsd talking since i have major trust issues from that, but i really feel like nobody seems genuine anymore. theyre like cold clones of each other who refuse to open up to you or just ignore you in favor of not being their number one besto friendo. are people that burdened these days that they dont have the decency to even respond to me when im speaking to them or what. i'm sick of making effort to try and get close to people when nobody else gives a fuck or bothers with basic social etiquette. if this is how im going to get treated every time, then id rather just sit in solitude and enjoy the peace of not being shat on or completely ignored.
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I wish /cgl/ had better janitors or something because all the bait posts and replies are annoying as fuck
I know people there like to rip on lolcow but at least here they clean up shitty posts/or ban people quick as fuck
for me he sounds like a typical obsessive perfectionist. It's few steps from OCD, so maybe that? If you're really interested in figuring him out, read some articles on perfectionism and OCD and decide what suits him more yourself. >>204012
oh anon. This is a very tough situation. Victims of abuse often won't listen, I know how hard it is to get to them. You need to talk with your mother about it, that what you two experience is ABUSE not some little family fights, that you need to move out, etc. Don't give up, because she will most likely try to push it away, so you pushing it back to her head is crucial
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Why don't we let suicidal people kill themselves? As long as they don't have any dependents or are minors, I don't see why letting them die is unacceptable. I guess there's legal issues and administration to deal with if you wanna go there, but what if they dealt with it before leaving? It seems crueler to force someone to live when they don't want to.
Fuck, I'm just saying all this because I want to die but I'm terrified of surviving and coming back retarded and/or crippled. It's also near impossible to get firearms in this country. I managed to find someone selling a barbiturate on the dark web but it was damn pricey and I didn't have any expendable income at the time.
I don't know if things are going to get any better. I stopped taking my medication a couple of weeks ago and I can't say I regret it because I can finally feel things now. I mean I just feel extra shitty and cry all the time, but there's no way I'm going back to feeling nothing.
It seems like I'll always feel this way even if I do 'do things'. I'm going back to uni next year to see if I can finish up and graduate, but I keep reading about how bad things are, and it's not even like I'm purposely looking for shit like that. It seems in endless supply nowadays. I used to think that as long as I could distract myself from being sad and work things through little by little I could get through, but lately all I can think of is dying, how to die, and getting upset when I realise how difficult it actually is to kill yourself. I tried imagining 'coping' and being independent, but it's not like I want a different or better life. I literally don't want to exist. Video games used to be my crutch but I'm losing interest because I feel so pathetic for getting a modicum of happiness from a fictional world.
I just.. what's the point? Even if I do graduate it'll be with a shitty degree that has zero practical value and as a bonus I'll be steeped in debt. I don't have dreams or anything I enjoy anymore, the future looks extremely bleak, I have no friends (lmao), and people are just… I don't know how I feel seeing all the scum crawl out of the floorboards in the wake of the US election and voicing their ''''''opinions''''''. Even as I type this I keep thinking, "bitch?? what the fuck is wrong with you??? stop being so fucking lazy THERE ARE PEOPLE ACTUALLY SUFFERING JFC," and "i don't care!! lmao end the suffering" in the same breath/thought/whatever. I know I could fight, but I don't want to if it doesn't change how I'll feel at the end of the day.
sage because i'm pathetic lol
>>204049>Why don't we let suicidal people kill themselves?
Because we care for them? Or personally, even if I don't know the person, everytime I read vent posts of someone suicidal my first instinct is to write back "Don't do it". I feel like one's life can always change, so committing suicide while young is a waste.
This is also kinda hypocritical of me because I'm suicidal myself currently, but my problem is my abusive mother that makes my life a living hell so I just need to run away from home. And even though my issue seems easier to solve, as it "simply" involves getting away from a place to instantly get better, it's so hard and I've decided that if in one year I still won't have moved out I'll end myself.
Pain is temporary suicide is forever
I can understand if its a painful, noncurable illness, but some people need help, and can be saved to live better and be happier
You have to understand that loved ones around you will be hurt suicide resulting from another suicide is nothing new
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>mental state goes to shit to the worst state it has been in years
>basically suicidal every single minute of my life
>nothing matters anymore and nothing excites me
>choking constantly thanks to overwhelming anxiety, barely can leave the house
>have to force myself even to eat because i have 0 energy
>decide to finally seek help because i cannot take it anymore and i think i will do something stupid
>check all the therapy clinics near me
>all cost 140+ euros per hour
>cannot afford them, they will not change the price, and all the other ones are 2-3+ hours away by train which would up the price to the same as the ones near me or more
>tried to talk to my (old grumpy man) doctor about how bad my mental state is so maybe he could redirect me to a free healthcare clinic
>he says that my "thoughts" and "feelings" are absolutely normal at my age and he will not redirect me since most people "figure it out" eventually and all the mumbojumbo about exercise (which i do every single day and doesn't help), healthy diet (which i do), good sleep time (which i have) blah blah blah and tells me to go paying if i really think need it that much as he does not see the necessity o me going
>tfw you seek help but you cannot afford it and people don't take you seriously because it's still a stigma in your shitty ass small town in the middle of nowhere
I am so tired of living in a small town full of judgemental old people, fuck.
Recently the doctor has been changed and they put up a young woman in charge, i think will try to get a second opinion from her and hopefully she will understand me better than that old cunt and she will help me get into free therapy, because eventhough my brain is suicidal and pushing me i know don't really want to kill myself, thus why i want help.
>>204059>told me I should go ahead with the order
You really should, Anon. You have nothing to lose.
Also it might be a hard thing to do but maybe you could entrust your dog to some friends until you can move out?
>>204055>Pain is temporary suicide is forever
Sorry if this comes across as me just sperging, but I really hate that cliché quote that EVERYONE says about suicide. Often times people are suffering for YEARS before they finally do it. Often times they don't have good relationships or resources to get out of the pain either. It is not temporary, and most people who are so depressed that they have suicidal thoughts have to fight it their entire lives, since depression can permanently alter your brain or pop up many times until the end of your life.
The thing about not killing yourself because loved ones will be hurt by it… is pretty bullshit. Where were these supposed loved ones when you have been hurting for the last ten, twenty, thirty years? Where were these supposed friends or family members when you tried to reach out and they blew you off? Where the fuck where they when it came to just casually interacting with you here and there, instead of only contacting you when they wanted to gain something?
Sure, it's no one's job to change you to not feel suicidal, you have to make those changes yourself, but it is so fucking hard to do that. There are a few special exceptions where someone is open about being suicidal for a long period of time and their loved ones ACTUALLY try their best to be supportive, but that is incredibly rare. Most people are too fucking self absorbed to notice or even care if they do know.>>204049
Anon, you only get one shot at this life. It will always be hard but if you can find little reasons to live, that alone is worth it. It is hard to stop feeling as you do when you realize how the world really is. Honestly, for no one other than yourself, you do deserve to take a good look at if you just want to stop existing or if you simply hate what your life is. That can ALWAYS change. It takes a lot of hard work, but we as humans have a great ability to adapt as long as we keep an open mind. Your thought process feels like a comfy crutch that makes sense of how bullshit this world really is, which isn't the best way to cope. Find those few reasons to live, even if it's just one. Whatever actually makes you feel something. And hold on to it. Make an educated decision and think things through. We are all nothing in the end and life is very short, so please chase whatever makes you feel alive. That is one of the few ways to feel ok with existing.
>>204049>Why don't we let suicidal people kill themselves?
Society doesn't actively prohibit it effectively, just the most painless and most convenient methods.
You can go out and buy any assortment of items which have a high chance of fatality if used properly, you can drive into a track, or wait for a train and put your neck on the rail as it approaches, or tie yourself to some weights and walk off a dock, etc.
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I'm so angry and annoyed that my ex was following my social media on twitter. I have less than 25 followers, and he made up a phony persona to follow me. Same with IG. I don't even know how he got my twitter, but he did. I just retweet game and art shit. I also use it to write my feelings. A while ago I wrote that I love my boyfriend, and on that very same day he wrote something about it on 4chan's /adv/ board.
I'm so fucking mad. He's the one who said that if I no longer share the same feelings for him, that I should delete and block him everywhere. For his sake, I did.
It disturbs me, and triggers my paranoia.
Everybody says time heals things but its been a while since I broke up with my last boyfriend.
We met initially as friends and then after a couple nights of hanging out and talking until the middle of the night, he asked me out. We started with a perfect relationship until things started to fall apart little by little. I realized near the end that he was a master liar and probably a sociopath. He gaslighted me the entire time, and compared other women to me. Last straw was when he cheated on me with multiple women, two of which who had aspbergers. It made me feel like shit because when I found out he told me what positions they did in bed, how he choked her, and how he liked having sex with them more than he did with me. Found out later from other people that when he wasn't with me, he was going off ranting to people about how global warming was a fraud, trump was the best president, and how he was going to start a cult. It was crazy realising what kind of person I had been dating (I still don't know what kind of mental problems he has)
I'm definitely OVER him in the sense that I never want to be with him again, but I'm definitely not over the emotional damage he caused. I compare myself to other women a lot now, and my insecurity is through the roof. Been trying to workout and find hobbies to make up for it but some of the shit he said and did really hurt me for life.
Is your dad aware that his behaviour is wrong? Does he care? Can you convince him to seek out help for himself and your mother to learn how to deal with feelings appropriately? You could maybe write a heart felt letter to each of them about your concerns.
Does your mother understand that what he's doing is completely unacceptable and she shouldn't have to deal with it? Relationships are complicated but sometimes being in love or the amount of time spent together just isn't a good enough reason to hang on to a relationship. If she is made to feel under threat that is not acceptable and nobody deserves that. You don't agree to be in a situation like that when you enter a friendship so why should it be any different with her life partner?
Making the jump is scary but she'll realise just how easy it is to leave once she's done it.
>>204082>A while ago I wrote that I love my boyfriend, and on that very same day he wrote something about it on 4chan's /adv/ board.
How do you even know it was him?
Regardless it sounds like you were the one dumping right? It just sounds like he has issues moving on and you should ignore him, that he's just moping around rather than doing anything malignant.
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I knew it was him because of the age he said his is, and what he wrote. The same exact words and the timing couldn't have been better.
Anyway, I don't care if he vents or anything. He threatened to kill himself and all and I seriously don't want that.
I just wish I didn't feel so paranoid about him stalking my shit
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I should just delete all my social media
I live in a very small town of rural Spain.
The big cities are a little better about it (still, you will rarely find any clinic below 120€+ per hour/half hour).
Now the TV is starting to air warnings about mental health which is nice and hopefully will aid the cause, but most towns are still absolute shit about it and mental health is very stigmatised and not treated as a "real illness".
I'm from Spain too and I absolutely agree with you. The only actual help I've received was from a private psychiatrist but every session costed 50€ and I couldn't afford it because I had too many topics to solve in just three or four sessions.
>he says that my "thoughts" and "feelings" are absolutely normal at my age
I was told exactly the same thing. His solution was to give my meds - again. When I tried to ask him for that kind of therapeutical help (even groupal one, I dind't mind), he told me that I had to be in a wait list for -maybe- more than half a year and that he wasn't sure I'd be admitted…It's nonsense.
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it all depends on taste, while the ~traditionally sexy blonde~ girl can attract more open and forward types of people, petite QT pale girls with short dark hair attract the type people tend to keep the crush to themselves until the feel like they can move forward
I forgot what thread it was but someone said that an 8/10 girl with modest dress is less likely to get flirted with than a 7.8/10 girl in more adventurous/ daring dress, I guess it applies in a way that people feel like they are expected to flirt with traditionally beautiful women where as people are expected to respect more reserved seeming women, even if they are more attractive than said big boobied curvy blonde
lol, I never get flirted with either. It thought it was because I was ugly but I guess it's just because I don't have the look like >>204162
It's not always about the looks either. From what >>204158
wrote we can assume her gf is having fun, probably enjoying herself, laughing, smiling, and the OP is feeling down, wanting to go home, insecure and sad. If you think it does not show, you're wrong. Even not very perceptive people subconsciously sense it and go for the positive person (or more outgoing-looking, more bubbly, etc).
Without false modesty, I'm good looking, but I'm also quiet, calm, reserved. I get approached, but very rarely, and sometimes people after getting to know me confess they thought I was unapproachable.
Maybe that's the case? How you present yourself?
Also Anon, it's nothing to be jealous of tbh, it's rather annoying. Unwanted attention very quickly gets tiring and it makes you feel like shit when you realize how very shallowly people are interested in you, as if you have nothing more to offer.
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same, a lot of my friends are tall, long hair, big boobs, basically the typical attractive features, I never get flirted with either, and literally have had male friends come to me and talk about how hot so-and-so is, as it later turned out, when I did get flirted with, it was in a "I want to be in a relationship with you" type of way, vs what my friends get as a "I want to just fuck you" kind of way, I don't think it's fair either way though, my friends have trouble keeping relationships because of the type of guys they attract because of their look, I turn down people who want relationships with me, but I'd feel more pretty and desirable if I wasn't the "hey your friend is hot" friend, not to sound like an attention whore
not the anon ur replying to, but in that moment you were feeling down about yourself and your looks due to the fact that ur gf was getting a lot of attention. when you're comparing yourself to another during a situation like that and it effects you negatively - it's likely due to jealousy. Maybe you didn't want the attention, but its hard not to feel a tinge of jealousy when someone is getting fawned over and ur being overlooked. Theres nothing wrong with it either.
Is she more outgoing or bubbly than you? Sometimes things like that can attract the attention of others - rather than looks.
Don't let it bug you, you've got a great gf… you should've just started making out right there to prove to everyone that shes taken!!
no stress anon, i'm sure youre lovely… dont meditate on these feelings
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I don't mind really. First time my twitter has been posted on an type of board. I'm just confused on how he found it, I've never ever given him my twitter handle.>>204131
I just don't want him to kill himself.
Tallness is a sign of power, womanlyness, and is modelesque, most guys who like short ladies are just typical annoying westerners and weeaboos, granted petiteness is desirable in east asian countries, but most smart women wouldn't spend time caring about a culture where the standard of beauty revolves around looking like a child doll
where I am from (sicily) people tend to like tall, curvy women, basically they want women to look as much as like a grown woman as possible, none of that "look like a petite pale loli" shit
>>204198>I just don't want him to kill himself.
I get that. Even in the worst of breakups, few people actually wish for anything like that.
But he's not going to. He's incredibly sad and depressed right now most likely, but everyone goes through that process. He'll eventually move on, it's just life. >>204188>his post is really creepy and embarrassing>he should kill himself.
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>>204205>Because our opinion of what's attractive or not doesn't revolve around what men think?
Trying to strip attraction from what your desired sex prefers is pretty silly. Especially considering the original post was explicitly about men ignoring her and trying to get in her SOs pants instead.
> Men wanting women to be small has a lot to do with their idea of power and masculinity rather than aesthetics alone.
So do women prefer taller men because they all want to be meek and submissive? That's how it goes, right?
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I just turned in an unfinished essay draft to my teacher. She never told me to type it, but I should have realized that.
I haven't made much of a good impression; they probably think I'm autistic or some shit. I've already had my family members tell me that I was.I have a hard time doing assignments and get distracted easily. Everything I do just makes it worse.
I'm already fucking up, and I regret majoring in graphic design, but if I drop out now, I'll have to pay back close to 20,000 dollars.
At this point, I have no idea what to do. If someone asked me what I was going to do in 5 years, I wouldn't have an answer.
I feel trapped between wanting to die and not wanting to die.>>204049
Are you me?
I'm sorry to hear that anons.
I'm from Germany so maybe we just have it too good here with our health care and rarely hear about stuff like this in the news. I always thought Europe was kinda the same in most things (with the exception of a few countries).
I always felt that Spain valued most things that we do to. While there is still a stigma here too, at least you can get help for free if you're diagnosed.
Sorry for being nosy but aren't there any kind of organizations that would help you guys find an unaffordable clinic. Even if it means staying in an actual clinic for a while it might help.
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Yeah, I feel that her being an awful therapist, other to her being simply dumb and probably sheltered, could be to address to the general uneducatedness about psychology in my country, and the fact that she looked like she was in her 60s. Young people now have a better education, young psychologists and therapists, although not as experienced as the older ones, have a bigger chance of being good imho. I have an old psychology book from the sixties and it says stuff like "people that masturbate in their adulthood have mental issues", lmao. If a concept like that has actually been said by a famous psychologist, written on a book and studied by hundreds if not thousands of people, it would easily explain why a therapist would look down on a young girl opening up about her problems and dismiss it as "a rebellious teenager". Basically what happened:>"My mother beats me up, spits on me and only ever calls me names like worthless, useless, piece of shit, whore and says that everyone is better than me, making me depressed and crushing my self esteem">"Damn Anon you really hate her don't you, I think you're exaggerating because rebellious phase blah blah, a parent would never hurt their kids"
And then proceeded to tell my mother that I was holding a childish grudge on her.
This shitshow scared me away from visiting another therapist ever again. I know that there are good ones, and a lot of them, I really do. Just… I'll rely on my resilience as long as I can do. I'm doing a good job so far, let's see what happens.>>204158
As other anons said, the traditional blonde goddess can attract a lot of men (especially Spanish and Italian ones, kek), but that doesn't mean that you're unattractive or anything. You're just a different type, that will attract different types of men. And trust me, beta orbiters are terrible to have around. In my opinion you're not losing anything: you're traveling around Europe with your hot gf, have a good time with her and be proud, because no one of those orbiters can touch her and you can. I'd be smug as fuck.
Finally became financially stable, want to start a family now. I have worked my entire life to finally make enough money to do this, I've put off (or been denied) relationships until now, I'm a virgin while most women have already fucked tons of guys, but I can compromise on that.
My main problem? I don't want to get divorce raped. Women can cheat in a marriage and face no legal punishment, they can divorce for any reason because of no-fault divorce laws.
In the divorce she would likely get custody of my children, get my house that I paid for, and get child-support/alimony payments. Then use this money to fuck other guys.
I'm being completely serious, this would make me angry enough to literally kill her, my entire life would be ruined, I would literally take a gun and kill her.
Modern American women are highly likely to cheat or divorce, there's a better chance of it happening than not. Prenups do not work (Judge can nullify a prenup if they want), and a prenup cannot decide who gets custody of (hypothetical) children anyway.
The only solution I can think of is that I will not marry or have children with any woman unless she fully believes that I will literally kill her if she tries to screw me in a divorce.
I will tell her, I'm ok with her divorcing and taking nothing, but if she tries to get custody of my children, the house, or my money, I will literally kill her.
I will not marry her unless she fully believes this, and is okay with it. I have thought a long time about this, and I can't think of any other possible solution. What else could I do? I don't even find this unreasonable, surely you women understand that it's extremely risky for men to marry women or have kids with women now right?(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
Why would women care about this threat if they didn't plan to divorce rape me?
If a woman told me that she would kill me if I cheated, and was being completely serious about it, I would want to marry her even more, because I know that I'm not going to cheat.(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
>>204282>I don't want to get divorce raped. Women can cheat in a marriage and face no legal punishment, they can divorce for any reason because of no-fault divorce laws.
It's called a prenuptial agreement you dumbfuck, and maybe if you're that ignorant about the basics of marriage then you're still not ready for any larger responsibilities like family.
Please don't burden any children with your stupidity by reproducing, if any woman stupid enough would have you…
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I'm tired of people around me being unhealthy as fuck and just reeling me into their pity parties around it. Especially when I try offering advice and they just discredit it even though I know what I'm talking about. I feel like this is happening more frequently once I started whipping myself in shape through diet and exercise.
A few of my friends are overweight and it's the same thing from each of them:
>oh I'm so fat, what do I do about this?
>oh anon you're so skinny and I could never be as fit as you!
>I need to lose weight but it's hard! I'm so busy/medically unable to/trying but it takes time!
And these same people proceed to shove their faces with sugary shit like ice cream and cakes all while guzzling down sodas and juices with it. And when I give gentle advice on what they can do, something along the lines of "I found that cutting soda/white carbs really helped me get on track to getting in shape!" they just get super defensive, and then finish with some half-baked promise like "once I get back from vacation/this month is over, THEN I'll get into shape!" ffs one of them requested that I find them weight loss pills because they have too much "water weight" and need to lose it in a matter of a week. It's not fucking water weight–it's fucking fat from eating two goddamn pints of gelato a day.
I mean it's not to say that I don't indulge from time to time, but I somehow keep myself from shoving my face with sweets on a daily basis. Dieting and exercise isn't easy for everyone, but goddamnit everyone can learn fucking self-control and moderation if they just put in the effort. I'm just tired of them getting snippy towards me and giving me attitude as if I don't know how oh-so-busy their days are. If I can find time to go and do some kind of physical activity for an hour and a half a day between work and courses, then so can they.
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I work at a call center and I fucking hate entitled asshole customers.
I was forced to do overtime again bc of all the bad weather, and out of the 12 hours I worked it just took one asshole towards the end of my shift to ruin my mood.
He wanted to know why he wasn't being refunded a service fee $70 on a fare he'd bought (and gotten a refund for), and I had to tell him booking fees were non-refundable as the 'service' was technically rendered even if the fare wasn't. First of all, he had no information for me despite being on hold and doing nothing with his precious time. Then, he purposefully threw me off because he accused us of having charged him $100 before I could even get ahold of the financial record. I finally found the info no thanks to him. After I corrected him and clarified the charge (I was told I was 'interrupting' him for offering to explain something during his long-winded tirade), he actually had the audacity to slam it in my face that he was a "business owner" (aka the 'CEO' of some no-name advertising .com website in PA), and that he "didn't have the time" to fill out the customer relations complaint form on our website. And that I should have had to "go over my head" and gotten a supervisor to speak to him because how dare we not be able to refund him the fee over the phone. And how dare I not read his mind that he wanted a supervisor. And shudder to think we lose his highness as a customer!
I don't know what piece of shit business owner throws a fit over $70 and doesn't have a secretary to do this work for him, but he really pissed me off. And I didn't say much except "I understand how you feel," because if I make these types of arrogant assholes feel (rightfully) shut down, they just stay on the line longer to try to argue with me more. Despite them knowing nothing will come of it.
I doxxed him and literally have all his info. I want to/wish I could do shit with it but it would just be too damn obvious.
You obviously didn't read the rest of my post.>>204292
Someone has to dress up as anime girls, there's a market demand for it, plenty of guys with money who want to jack off to 3D anime girls.
How can you even compete?>>204293
You need emotional detachment to work in a call center, all you have to do is whatever you're obligated to do, it's a dead-end job anyway.
Why aren't you just a housewife instead?
>>204294>you need emotional detachment
You're the one denying what a prenup is and saying overemotional buzzwords like "divorce rape."
My job happens to offer 4 weeks paid vacation, good benefits, perks, and is a recognized international brand. My problem is retarded people in the world, like you, and not the job.
If you read the rest of my post, you would have read that prenups don't work, or likely won't work. Judge can nullify them for any reason, and you can't decide child custody in a prenup.
>overemotional buzzwords like "divorce rape."
I don't like the term myself, but there is no other terminology in the English language that I'm aware of that means the same thing.
Emotional detachment is needed for working at a shitty call-center job, not for starting a family.
Again, why aren't you just a housewife instead of working at a call-center? You could be taking care of your children at home, but feminism cucked you into being a wageslave at a call-center instead lmao, so empowering instead of being a housewife.
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>>204282>Modern American women are highly likely to cheat or divorcehttps://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/infographics/images/ijyqLPSDy6S8.png
also can't forget the japanese women who give other japanese women cheating tipshttp://en.rocketnews24.com/2014/01/10/unfaithful-women-share-tips-on-how-to-cheat-without-getting-caught/
also, if this isn't bait, if you're threatening to kill someone over issues such as that you're mentally unstable and deserve to have your kids taken away from you
there's a reason you're still a virgin hun, not even the goody two shoe ladies want to date a man who sprouts out this BS
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>>204313>also can't forget the japanese women who give other japanese women cheating tips
I'll never understand the thought process these actions require. Do they just ignore the fact it's incredibly unfair to their partner?
>>204315>while I'm not one of those people who think the second someone cheats they're the worst person ever and deserve to be lynched
What bugs me is how cold it is.
I can at least understand doing something emotionally charged and in the moment, like saying something shitty during an argument or even cheating on someone while at a party surrounded by bad influences. Not condoning and it's entirely on you to make amends, but at least I can understand how it happened.
But an affair is a measured thing, an act you keep up for a significant period. They know it is wrong, that their partner deserves to know, but they do it anyways even though they had a moment to think it over.
No, most people are yellowish beige and tan nicely. Pale pink skin that burns is seen as typically British.>brown hair is rare
Not really, it's just mousy brown rather than dark brown and lots of girls dye theirs black anyway.
>>204285> Why would women care about this threat if they didn't plan to divorce rape me?
I know you're a troll, but really sit down and think about how stupid you sound right now dude. Women would care because that is mentally unstable and if you would threaten their life over a hypothetical situation then what else would you do?Nobody wants to be in a relationship like that.
Don't get married. Ever. You also sound like you are not mentally healthy enough to have kids, so put that off as long as possible until you get some help.
That's something i've always wanted to ask someone like you:
you said you worked hard, saved up and now you want to start a family. That's okay.
But than you go on and basically say the majority of women are money-hungry sluts etc.
Now, it's 2017. Girls are also studying hard and they earn money; so women are no longer financially dependant on men. Most women take care more about their looks than the average male, plus physically we don't need sex, we don't jerk of on a daily basis like guys do.
Judging from your post it seems that you think that most females are below your standard, so answer me this: what do you have to offer to women?
They don't need your money, they don't need sex. Dudes like you go on and on about no longer needing woman than sex cyborgs or shit like that are made, but let's face it, women already no longer need men today
Lmfao sorry I noticed that too later.
That was an asshole sentence though sorry for that !
Restless leg syndrome is the worst.
Can you even diagnose it ?
I'm pretty sure I have it as well as several family members. But it doesn't always appear maybe once a month if I'm lucky only every other month and not always while I'm sleeping.
Sorry kinda curious about it.
She says you can see it in the sleep study, by the leg movements, I think.
Honestly I'm not sure that's it. I do have the weird pains that wake me up and that are sometimes relieved by walking around but idk. I'm full of weird pains that I think are only in my head anyway. It's mostly around the knees and calves, going up to mid thigh when it's really at worst.
I just researched it more and it seems there is more to manage it besides massaging it or relaxation techniques like I thought. Maybe I should go see the sleep specialist…
Vent? I don't like that term. It makes it sound like it's a necessity, that if I don't say something I'll overheat and die. That's not really the case so we'll call it something else, an explanation. I'm not sure where to begin, there's no particular troubling event, just the malaise of life in contemporary society. Forgive me if I'm vague in some areas, if I am it's because explaining the whole situation would take too long and focus on the unimportant aspects. Let's start simple.
I'm a 24 year old [person] who after a sequence of events, has ended up in a particularly isolating place. I say particularly isolating, because everywhere that I've been has imposed on me an isolating effect, this one is just stronger. It's something that I've experienced since I was around… 12? Who knows why that is. It could be because I'm very introverted, or because my intelligence (tested at 19 with a FSIQ of 143), my bundle of idiosyncrasies, a combination? None of the above? Why doesn't really matter. Just know that the feelings of isolation tend to grow as I get older, and where I am now is possibly one of the worst places I could be. It makes our solution at the end of this post here impossible to accomplish (in meatspace).
So, like most people experiencing isolation in real life, we turn to cyberspace. Cyberspace works well for a while, and we live a digital life far more satisfying than our real one. But things in cyberspace can't go well forever. Unavoidable entropic processes take their effect, and the isolating agents of the real world encroach on cyberspace. Sanctuaries turn into Hell, and we exile (or are exiled) ourselves to the nearest outpost. But these outposts are small, and lack much activity, they do not completely fulfill their purpose. Nothing can escape entropy, and they are doomed to succumb to the same fate. At some point in the near future, we become just as isolated in cyberspace as we are in the real world.
So my problem? Nigh complete social atomization as the world degenerates around me. How do I solve a problem like that? My idea is pretty simple, find another atomized person. Stay with them forever. The entropic effects of social decay do not effect individuals, so long as [they] exist, we are content. This is easier said than done, and my chance of succeeding is near zero.
You: "Women are divorce raping, they take everything from men!"
Also you: "Why aren't you femanons housewives? You're cucking yourselves by not staying at home and having children!"
If you're so against alimony, then why do you advocate women burden themselves financially with kids, be stay at home, and then get shocked that when they divorce they ask for enough money and possessions to live while continuing unemployment that YOU advocated they should do in the first place?
I agree with you and mostly feel the same way.
But honestly, the way you type and pick your words makes you sound like the biggest asshole ever for some reason. Somehow I believe you're a very annoying and pretentious person. Do you have any idea why this might be?
I don't know. Maybe I am? That's the simplest answer isn't it? It's not impossible. If it's true, that I'm annoying, pretentious, or an asshole, I can't change it. Well, I can't change it without devastating consequences. Plus it only contributes to the problem doesn't it? Maybe you just don't like me? Who knows.>>204376
That was a 100% serious post. Why do you think it wasn't?
Actually after thinking about it for a bit longer. Here's a better answer.
To explain things in greater detail would have taken too long, and wouldn't have been interesting to many people. I chose instead to be vague and not talk about things that happened specifically only passing over them. I focused on the result of the things, how it makes me feel. Had I told the same essential story explaining events, maybe people could be more sympathetic. It also doesn't help that the problem is anti-sympathetic in nature. I tried to use descriptive words that are rarely used in casual conversation (when's the last time you used entropic in casual conversation?) so the post would be more concise. Maybe that accounts for pretension? Maybe stating the fact that I'm intelligent accounts for that too? People generally speaking don't like to hear that sort of thing, even if it's true (or relevant).
So, not the best way to play to the crowd, but I'm not sure that's what I was going for anyway. Maybe I was agitating the crowd instead? Whatever. I was honest.
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anon, get to a doctor and get a blood test
sounds like you have a vitamin deficiency or iron deficiency, which is the best case scenario
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have you seen the economy lately? or better yet have you seen the "men" who preach for everyone who has a vagina to become a housewife?
unless you're planning to live in a suicide apartment with a cardboard bed and eating a cracker with some tap water for breakfast lunch and dinner, then it is merely impossible to live comfortably and support two adults and some kids with only one income, unless of course that income is really high, and considering all the manlets who want housewives make shitty minimum wage jobs, or better yet even unemployed with no other plans for the future, I think you should shut up, sorry women make money for themselves and not depend on insecure uggos to buy their needs
this, I know what you mean, I'm scared to have any problem with me because I don't want to seem like a munchie
I have the same problem, turns out I was anemic, for cutting down sugar you probably shouldn't do because when I feel tired at work or school I have a honey bun in my purse and just take a bite of it and it perks me up
as said before, you might be anemic, do you ever have fainting spells around your period? do you get cold easily? is your skin pale?
Women's place in society should be as wives/mothers, AND I disagree with the feminist divorce courts.
I want divorce without justification to be illegal and highly stigmatized, I want cheating in a marriage to be punished by the law, and I want women to get nothing in the divorce unless the man cheated.>>204365>Now, it's 2017. Girls are also studying hard and they earn money; so women are no longer financially dependant on men.
There is no shortage of women who are unemployed, or employed in shitty minimum wage work, and want to be housewives.
Women go to college for meme degrees that don't pay shit.
>They don't need your money,
Reality says otherwise, because in the adult world, women judge a man's value almost entirely based on how much money he makes.
Women are still whores that require money from male partners no matter how much money they make themselves. They don't want unemployed househusbands like men want unemployed housewives. A guy with no money, and no future plans to make money, is a deal breaker to over 99% of women.
How many adult women would date an adult male NEET?>>204387
Yes this is unfortunate, and it's largely the fault of feminism, women almost doubled the workforce and that lowers wages, they also voted to flood western countries with immigrants, that also lowers wages.
What about men who do make enough money to afford a house, wife, and kids on his income alone?
They exist you know, but they're all terrified of getting married or having kids because women can ruin their lives in a divorce.
>>204403>women should be wives and mothers
Well then don't begrudge them alimony (aka their living taken from you) as they would need it until they find another man since they would be jobless and have children to provide for. You would owe your ex a living if you forbid her a job and force children onto her. >cheating should be punished by law
It won't happen, but what would be the punishment? And the punishment given to the staggering number of men who cheat?
>sage for responding to robot but why hasn't mod or farmhand given this poster their icon yet???
Women should only be given alimony if the man cheats, or he initiates the divorce without justifiable reason.
Also there is no such thing as marital rape, it doesn't exist, but if a man is forced to "rape" his wife every time he wants sex, that is justifiable cause for divorce.
If a woman causes the divorce, or initiates it herself without justifiable reason, she gets absolutely nothing. Simple as that.
>they would need it until they find another man since they would be jobless and have children to provide for. >they would need
You know what happens to men when they can't get a job, and have no family support? They become homeless.
She leaves the marriage with something more than valuable enough to prevent her from being homeless: her pussy.
>It won't happen, but what would be the punishment?
Personally I would prefer public beating and stigmatization from society (this requires a non-degenerate society), but that doesn't work out anymore, so prison.
The partner could who was cheated on could decide to drop charges if they want of course.
>>204403> it's largely the fault of feminism, women almost doubled the workforce and that lowers wages
it's called a shitty economy, during the WWII tons and tons of women had to get factory, retail, nursing, etc jobs, why are you acting like it's at fault with feminism? more like people trying to survive as well as live on their own, it's mostly at blame with overpopulation hence why overpopulated communities have higher costs of living
> they also voted to flood western countries with immigrants, that also lowers wages.
go back to /pol/ ya insecure manlet, it's not like women and men made a split decision to vote to bring in immigrants, plenty of women were against it, infact most of the women I know are against it themselves, and if anything I knew more men who were for it than I knew women for it
>What about men who do make enough money to afford a house, wife, and kids on his income alone?
They exist you know, but they're all terrified of getting married or having kids because women can ruin their lives in a divorce.
have you even met men like so? the one I have met often encourage their women to get jobs, go to school, and do what they want with their life, they're not "terrified of getting married or having kids" and if you knew anything about said men, then you'd know the vast majority of them ARE married, and what's your annual income mr~everyone should become a housewife~
>Reality says otherwise, because in the adult world, women judge a man's value almost entirely based on how much money he makes.
bitch where? a girl gets called a gold digger the second she asks for lunch money, anytime a woman wants a man to pay for anything she gets shamed, I've knew more women who feel bad about men buying them things than I've met gold diggers, it's like these women only exist on tv, not in real life
> A guy with no money, and no future plans to make money, is a deal breaker to over 99% of women.
wait, weren't you just saying how women judge men by how much money they make now you're saying broke guys get all the pussy? make up your mind
>Women go to college for meme degrees that don't pay shit
yes, and please tell me what gender nurses, secretaries, LPNs, OBYGYNs, real estate agents are? do you even look at statistics or did you meet 2 art hoes and now you think all women go to school for shit degrees?
>I want women to get nothing in the divorce unless the man cheated
so you want women to be housewives, but you also want women to get nothing in divorce? that makes no sense, if you make it to where women have to be financially dependent on men but don't want her to get anything if divorce happens, then wtf?
>>204404>if you make it to where women have to be financially dependent on men but don't want her to get anything if divorce happens, then wtf?
Correct, why is this blowing your mind? That's how things worked for thousands of years of human history.
>now you're saying broke guys get all the pussy?
You read that wrong, I'm saying that outside of educational systems, an unemployed man with no money is unacceptable
to over 99% of women, regardless of his looks, personality, hobbies, or intelligence.
Nothing else really matters to women except how much money a guy makes, every other flaw in a guy can be overlooked so long as he makes decent money.
Inb4 bullshit stories about how you know some girl who started a long-term relationship with a NEET who she didn't previously know. This NEVER happens.
women were also sold off to their uncles and raped then thrown aside once they popped out enough kids or turned 20
>> A guy with no money, and no future plans to make money, is a deal breaker to over 99% of women.
is exactly what you said, why does it baffle your mind that women wouldn't want a broke loser who isn't going anywhere with their life? you can think the same about women to and its understandable, no one wants someone with no ambition except for others with no ambition
>Nothing else really matters to women except how much money a guy makes, every other flaw in a guy can be overlooked so long as he makes decent money.
then explain why all these unemployed guys are getting laid? why are all these guys that live in crack houses fucking girls? why are all the minimum wage mcdonalds college students getting their dicks wet every night? because women only like money and nothing else? where even are you getting this from? do you even have proof for this claim outside of staged tv shows ?
>4 bullshit stories about how you know some girl who started a long-term relationship with a NEET who she didn't previously know
it happens more than you think, you just don't meet people outside of your 4chan buddies and the people who talk to you in the youtube comment section of MGTOW videos
>>204404>then explain why all these unemployed guys are getting laid?
They can get laid (e.g. going to night clubs and having one-night stands with disgusting sluts), but they can't enter a long-term relationship, and any gf/wife he had before being unemployed is probably going to leave him soon.
>why are all these guys that live in crack houses fucking girls?
The rules work a bit different for drug addicts. Ironically, a relationship between two unemployed drug addicts is the only example you could give of a straight relationship (outside of schools) where the girl isn't literally a whore.
>why are all the minimum wage mcdonalds college students getting their dicks wet every night?
Because they're college students, and they have income right now on top of that. They already have money, and more importantly, because they're in college women see them as a future source of money.
There is 6ft+, 8/10+, muscular NEETs with 130+ IQs and great personalities living in their mom's basement, but no girl would ever enter a relationship with them because they have no money to offer. Why can't they get a girlfriend?
Because to women money is that much more important over everything else.
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yes because people NEVER meet in high school or college, the poorest points of their lives and get into long term relationships, oh wait, thats how most long term relationships form, or with long distance, which a lot of the time between normal teen or early 20s women, is of course with a poor or middle class man, the only times you see the stereotypical mail order gold digger shit is on TV shows, have you ever even met people in long term relationships?
legit, do you even go outside?
>There is 6ft+, 8/10+, muscular NEETs with 130+ IQs and great personalities living in their mom's basement, but no girl would ever enter a relationship with them because they have no money to offer. Why can't they get a girlfriend?
and where are you finding these supposedly perfect but poor men who can't get girlfriends? what are you elliot rodger or some shit? because you are talking exactly like him
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>>204414>yes because people NEVER meet in high school or college
You're obviously not reading my posts. I specifically said "outside of educational systems".
In high school and college money still doesn't matter that much to girls. Outside of schools? It's practically the only thing that matters to them when looking for a guy.
>and where are you finding these supposedly perfect but poor men who can't get girlfriends?
I'm one of them. Check /fit/ or /pol/.
>""outside of educational systems""
well no shit, if you aren't going outside, not putting effort into meeting people or having a girlfriend, it aint womens fault you cant get anyone
>In high school and college money still doesn't matter that much to girls. Outside of schools? It's practically the only thing that matters to them when looking for a guy.
and where are you getting this information? I never met any woman who expected a guy to pay for shit, the only times these women exist it to elliot rodger complex neets
>I'm one of them. Check /fit/ or /pol/
well that explains a lot
no one likes guys who lurk on internet boards like /pol/ all day, in fact in other threads women talk about how their boyfriend will start going to these boards, the guys turn into shit tier boyfriends, women call them out, they improve, and some even thank the women for calling their shit out, it's not cause you're poor you can't get a girlfriend, it's because of everything else
>"I WILL KILL YOU IF YOU DIVORCE ME!!!!!!"
>women only want money
>all women should quit their jobs and become housewives
>women shouldn't get shit in divorce
>I'm a perfect man who can't get a girlfriend because I'm poor
>I also lurk 4chan
yeah hunny, it's not cause you're poor
>>204418>and where are you getting this information? I never met any woman who expected a guy to pay for shit
Do you even live on Earth? Even if a girl pays for a date, she still requires the guy to be able to pay for the date if he had to.
The only reason girls won't let guys pay for a date is because she wants to pretend that she's not a whore. Guess what, you're still a whore because if he _couldn't_ pay for the date, then you wouldn't be dating him, so you're still a whore.
>yeah hunny, it's not cause you're poor
If I was a ugly, fat, short, held all those political beliefs you hate, and had an even worse "personality" in your opinion, but I made decent income, I could still easily have a girlfriend.
Women are all whores, it doesn't matter how ugly or how much of an asshole a guy is, if he makes good money, he will have all kinds of girls who want him.
>>204419>Even if a girl pays for a date, she still requires the guy to be able to pay for the date if he had to.
I mean yeah, some guys pay for dates but expect the woman to pay if needed, no one wants to be stuck in a restaurant with no money >The only reason girls won't let guys pay for a date is because she wants to pretend that she's not a whore. Guess what, you're still a whore because if he _couldn't_ pay for the date, then you wouldn't be dating him, so you're still a whore.
erm, what? have you ever even been on a date, as a woman, me and plenty of other women I know paid for myself, once I even paid for the guy, can you see in different realities where if a guy was poor the woman wouldn't be dating him? no? then shut up
>If I was a ugly, fat, short, held all those political beliefs you hate, and had an even worse "personality" in your opinion, but I made decent income, I could still easily have a girlfriend.
yeah, no, you could be a sugar daddy, that's about it, I have yet to meet a girl who would date some mentally ill 4chan creep just for his money
>Women are all whores, it doesn't matter how ugly or how much of an asshole a guy is, if he makes good money, he will have all kinds of girls who want him.
and you still have yet to prove that without scripted shows, I'm waiting
>>204420>once I even paid for the guy,
Congrats, you only did it so you can pretend that you're not a whore.
You're still a whore because if he COULDN'T pay for the date, if he was broke and unemployed, then you wouldn't be dating him.
>you could be a sugar daddy,
ALL boyfriends, ALL husbands, are sugar daddies.
> I have yet to meet a girl who would date some mentally ill 4chan creep just for his money
7 billion people on this planet, 4chan doesn't even have 50 million users.
Every single girl you've ever known has dated a guy for his money, unless the relationship started in high school or college.
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Sure would be nice to have another Hellweek 'round here.
Also, /cgl/ is in dire need of actual moderation rather than just janitors. So many useless threads shitting up the board.
I reported the samefagging robot yesterday but no action yet.
I don't think hellmonth is necessary again, we just really don't need incel NEETs disguised as employed men trolling around here.
Let me tell you something; i'm from Germany, which is definatly a rather wealthy country and my mom's coworker at school would love to have a child of her own. Mind you, both she and her boyfriend have jobs that are by no means paying badly, but still, in order to raise the kid she would need to reduce hours (on the countryside there is no option like putting it in daycare) but when they would no longer have enough to live. So they both still have to save up for a few years in order to even live a life remotely close to what you desire.
The whole world makes fun of our low birth numbers, we are dying out blah blah, but that's the sad reality; even you're average people can no longer afford children, so nowaday both partners simply have to work, even in first world countries
>>204419>Every single girl you've ever known has dated a guy for his money, unless the relationship started in high school or college.
When why did yuo genius not get a 'loyal' gf during school?
>If I was a ugly, fat, short, held all those political beliefs you hate, and had an even worse "personality" in your opinion, but I made decent income, I could still easily have a girlfriend.
I thought you have decent income/saved up, so why are you still a virgin?
Is it maybe because you're theory is not working and women are not the desperate sluts you're trying to make yourself believe they are?
By the way, did you ever share your views with your parents?
>>204419>If I was a ugly, fat, short, held all those political beliefs you hate, and had an even worse "personality" in your opinion, but I made decent income, I could still easily have a girlfriend.
Yeah, you could easily find a gold digging girlfriend, not any/every girl would date you, much less the ones that hate you and aren't gold diggers. Your logic is clouded because you think all women are the same, but you sound as smart and rational as someone saying "i could easily pay a whore to have sex with me, therefore all women are whores!"
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The fire must grow, we have to feed it.
Worse exist than this whinny incel.
Disappointed a lot of these guys don't go the Newton/Tesla/Erdős route tbh. Though maybe no such opportunities exist anymore though.
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I'm starting to feel like an idiot for being a kissless virgin. I want to fall in love and have a bf like most women my age, but I'm a loser and I'm picky. There's a guy at work who is nice and really hot, just thinking about him makes me so self-conscious about it. Me feeling lonely these days doesn't help either.
I also went back to college this week and I already want to quit and find a job. I'm only "learning" useless things and it makes me feel like I'm wasting my time and energy when I could get some rest or work more and save money to move out.
I can't afford to eat, I got paid today, and of course, it was only for 75% of the work I did, and didn't even get paid for work I did this week, on top of all that I was diagnosed with a scoliosis and the surgery would cost 25k after insurance and all, I don't understand what I'm doing wrong, I had to delay college for a year because I worked my ass off daily filling out application after application interview after interview and now they finally wanted to give me a job which of course I can't even survive on
I live with my parents and desperately want to move out because I'm in a shitty situation, the only times a day I'm able to eat is breakfast and dinner, if I'm even home around dinner, my work doesn't allow me anywhere to put a lunch so I can't really bring my own food and I can't go home and get any because I live an hour away
for my parents, they pretty much stalk me, yell at me when I'm not even doing nothing, I'm afraid to leave my room because if my parents see me they'll find something to bitch at me for, I can't go out much because they have a gps on my phone despite me being an adult and freak out whenever I go somewhere and spam call me if I work overtime that I don't get paid for which I do anyway because I don't want to get fired
better yet I don't have a lot of clothes and been given a dress code which the 6 articles of clothing I have barely meet, I don't want to waste money on clothes either, since I can barely afford to eat and I'd rather starve and wear old tattered clothing than to waste money because I need to leave my parents
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Sorry for your loss.
Spoonies and munchies are just attention whores, but don't think about it now. It would just make you feel worse instead of better, and coping with the death of a loved one is already hard as it is.
than you anon. im really going to try and keep that in mind. it would be a disservice to someone who was a fighter to associate her with them.. i just feel so lost right now.>>204535
i do too. its terrible.
I'm taking care of my moms dogs during the day while she's at work atm (only for like 2 weeks), and while walking/feeding/playing with them isn't in any way inconvenient or tiresome, their constant need for attention is. It has made me realize that i'll never want to actually take care of a dog of my own.
Their psychological dependence on me feels unnatural and creepy, as if they can never be petted enough, talked to enough or played with enough. I can see what the last hundred years of dog breeding has done to them, and it doesn't feel right.
Atm the little one is restlessly walking around my appartment, sometimes silently whimpering for attention but shuns away when i try to give her some. (They are not sick and are well taken care of by my mother) The big one thinks we're going for a walk or getting food every single time i rise up from a chair, or pick something up, or make a sound.
They get walked/played with plently, but it's clear dogs in general aren't supposed to stay indoors most of the day.
I feel like i can never relax around them, i'm always tense and feel slightly irritated. As soon as my mom come and gets them in the evening my whole body instantly relaxes.
I used to want a dog when i grew up, but i'm starting to realize what dog "haters" mean when they say how annoying and dependent dogs are. My friend describes most dogs as being breeded to the point of brain damage, and i think he's right.
I could never hate dogs tho, i think they're wonderful in moderation, i just don't want to live with them.
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My very close friend got a boyfriend around last year and it was a critical hit to our friendship. It's LDR so every holiday, every free time she spends at his place or he at hers. Me and her also live far away from each other, so before the bf came to the scene, we would use holidays to spend time together. Now it's impossible, we can't hang out just the two of us, it either with him or not at all. She can't shut up about him, it's nearly impossible to talk about something without her mentioning her bf.
I feel happy for her, because it's all been very good for her mental health, but I'm also sad, because she goes out of contact for weeks/months when they're together, we barely talk, and I don't like some life decisions she's making… Clearly to be closer to him etc, but she risks a lot and I've seen her get cucked by guys too much. I have a bad feeling about it… I just don't see the same involvement, engagement from his side, and the way they interact is weird. He's overly protective and bossy, "daddy" type, maybe that's their thing, I don't want to know.
He became her whole life and I don't think it's healthy (and safe).
I'm jealous of the time they spend together, sad about our very special friendship slowly dying, worried about her future…
Idk, feels bad man.
I know what you mean, almost all my female friends did that, basically we all planned on moving in together, I find apartments and everything, then one friend wants to move in with her boyfriend, changed her entire career goal for him, and so on, that wasn't as bad as the other case though, this one he got her addicted to meth, treats her like shit and does nothing but fuck her and drop off his kid which he knocked up some girl while they were in high school, none of her friends like him and god knows why she is with him, I'd make her leave him if I could because currently she lives in a trailer with her friend who also hates her boyfriend, I offered her to come stay with me but she declined, and I offered her to go on a trip with me but she declined because her boyfriend doesn't like it when she is away
the third one, she is an adult but her mom never lets her leave, she once went to a different state but when I ask her if she wants to go to the nearest city which is 30 minutes away she declines because her parents don't allow that? I just don't understand if I'm just annoying or I have shitty friends
I've been in that situation before, I did regret gaining all the weight I did, but you have to know how your body gains weight, I mostly gained it in my ass, thighs, stomach and face, not my tits sadly, I'm trying to lose it, but I regret binging and stopped working out for the dumbass trend
how much do you weigh anon
I mean, only an idiot would give you shit over not being thrilled about having an energetic dog in a small apartment. But different dogs have different needs, I'd suggest something more like a corgi for someone in a city apartment.
I loved my Aussie Shepard, but one of the main reasons she worked so well was because she was in a family of 4 to give lots of attention and had lots of room to run around. If she was cooped up and had nothing to do with her energy, she'd have probably gotten into a lot of trouble. Meanwhile my mothers pomeranian-poodle mix is fairly independent and would probably work well for someone in your position.
>My friend describes most dogs as being breeded to the point of brain damage, and i think he's right.
Dogs are basically wolves that never went through puberty. Huskies are some of the dogs closest to their ancestors and even they can have separation anxiety pretty quickly. The fact is they're pack animals, if anything I would argue an independent dog is the one who had their mentality changed the most.
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The world takes all types. Some people prefer thicker chicks, some prefer slim ones with DFC. Just focus on what works for you and own it. I mean for christ sakes there are tons of women who think Benedict Cumberbatch is attractive when I'm convinced he's an alien cross breed.
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I love you, anon. That was perfect.
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I posted this last month but now I have a consultation with a GI because it never got better and I probably have something wrong with my intestines. A bunch of my other relatives have gastrointestinal issues like polyps and ulcerative colitis so I guess it was inevitable for me to have to see a butt doctor, too.
no, I'm from south america, I can assure you, not everyone was obsessed with basketball sized asses since "2003"
it didn't really hit till 2010, and only got bigger since
>>204693>one of my brothers friends compared me to a whale and said it looked just like me.
That's really strange and inappropriate. My friends brother is basically a low functioning autistic and someone would get death glares at a bare minimum if they tried to make fun of him over it.
Also I'm not going to say you should break up, but beware of trying to keep something around long past its expiration point. It'll just make things worse for everyone involved.
They're like 19 I believe, but they still have the mindset of a 14 year old. I didn't want it to get to me because I kept reminding myself of that, but just hearing it caused me to believe everyone thought I looked like one (just huge in general)>>204709
About the relationship thing, I understand what youre saying. I guess it's just a part of me that's scared to let it go. He's a very nice guy and hasn't done anything to hurt me. He talks about our future a lot (getting a place to stay or even marriage) which I think really made me feel this way. I did tell him that I felt not ready at all (he understood what I was saying), but since then I just felt like i was growing up too quickly. I graduated high school and I'm heading to college soon. I just feel like I won't be able to expierence new things or even new people. I don't know how I'm going to feel in a few years. Every time we call or around eachother now, I just feel like it's a chore. I feel guilty and just bad for feeling this way.
>>204712> He's a very nice guy and hasn't done anything to hurt me.
Sometimes people can have things end and no one was really the bad guy. That's a fact of life romance films tend to dance around. That's not to say things can't be resolved either, but that's only a fair statement when you haven't looked into every option.
For instance, it depends on what you define by "experience new things". For some that involves casual sex for some reason, and would make things an obvious dead end.
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I hate that feeling when you finish watching a really good tv show and then you're like "What do I watch next? Will it be even remotely as good as the one I've just finished?" lol
I'll miss you American Gods
By the way, I think we need a tv show general thread
Anyone ever been in a relationship with a schizoid person?
I just read about the symptoms and I strongly suspect my ex has it. It just matches up so perfectly - it was always so confusing to deal with him because of how difficult he was to read. Often he'd be completely stone-faced and not show any emotion, even when I was being upbeat and cracking jokes (like, sometimes he would just stare silently at me when I tried to lighten things up… it was sort of uncomfortable). So naturally I assumed he was mad or worried about something. But when I asked what was wrong, he would act confused and not know what I was talking about. It was confusing because sometimes he'd be really affectionate and warm, and then just completely "dead" days after. He would say, yes, he really DOES want to be with me, but then make no effort to be closer.
He used to say that he had trouble getting close to people and self-disclosing, but I always thought this meant that he was just really shy and insecure. But now I think he was just emotionally detached, lacked some self-awareness, and other people didn't know how to interact with him so they didn't bother.
It fucked with me because I kept thinking he was just pretending to like me, or that he was using me, when really he was just socially anhedonic.
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I think my boyfriend is lying to me about finding me attractive. His exes look nothing like me, his friends make fun of him for being with someone like me, he takes ages to cum when we have sex (but he cums easily from masturbating when alone), the girls he points towards which he finds attractive are the opposite of me, and whenever he compliments me it sounds very forced.
I'm short, have small boobs, I'm fairly slim (but not that much muscle definition), white and have blonde hair.
He seems to be more interested in tan girls with brown hair, or Asians. Basically anything as long as it isn't me. Though at the same time he says he's crazy about me and wants to marry me.
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I hate getting close to people because I always seem to get burned. Every best friend I've ever had, barring my SO, has fucked off out of nowhere. Shit sucks.
>pic somewhat related
Don't diagnose other people using a Wikipedia checklist.
Not only do you know nothing about it and what it looks like, they're your ex and there's no use thinking about a past relationship so much.
I like how anons are always "break up with him"
Try confronting him about it, openly and bluntly. Sometimes people date out of their preferences, because looks are not everything, ya know
But if it's affecting you, your self-esteem or relationship, then just speak up. Honestly, do it… >My friend's bf flirted with me and I asked him what the fuck; he said he loves his girlfriend, she's everything he's looking for in a woman, but he just can't find her attractive (but he finds me). And if I won't sleep with him, he will find someone else anyway, basically promised to cheat because he can't accept his gf looks
Men are weird, better be straightforward about it, anon.
>>204749>I like how anons are always "break up with him"
Especially when he's done nothing shitty, his crime is cumming too slow.
If anything I'd suggest they try something new in bed. Like so what if he gets off faster when he masturbates? That's true for most guys because you're only working around your needs rather than trying to consider your partner too.
The way you treat relationships are as if the guy is doing a favor dating you. Like it's your obligation to put up with any kind of shit they do because you can't find anything better.
Seriously, love yourself a bit more.
>>204764>The way you treat relationships are as if the guy is doing a favor dating you
No one is saying that.
What I am personally saying is that being paranoid about his ex's is one of the most classic insecurities. Of which I'm not unsympathetic, but I'm suggesting the two of them get past it together rather than breaking up every time she's feeling down. Like look at her evidence. He comes quicker when masturbating than during sex, something most guys do. His ex's look different than her, yet he's with her. He's never actually disparaged her or tried to hurt her self esteem, instead only giving compliments by her own admission.
It's rather silly for your first action be to break up considering all of this information.
THIS. My boyfriend is out of my normal type and I have never been this happy. If he saw my exes, he would be insecure. But I am so attracted to his personality that he is now super attractive to me in every way. People's preferences change and vary.
His friends are asses, but he probably finds you hot as hell.
Ehm I'm extremely submissive and act as his sex slave, I only care about his needs and I obey his every wish. I've asked whether he wants to try something new, but he said he likes the way we usually do it.
Okay is it normal for him then to take 90 minutes to cum with me around, but alone just 2 minutes? In our entire relationship he's only cum twice by me without him having to finish it himself. I've asked whether I feel tight enough, and he said definitely, sometimes too tight. I've asked whether my blowjob skills are good enough, he said I've given him a few that were the best he's ever had. The only problem then can be is that he's disgusted by me.
It's also not just the exes, he's shown me the girls he used to masturbate to, without me ever asking. He randomly tells me he'd fuck a girl, but then turns around telling me he's only sexually attracted to me. He's asked me to wear a wig during sex so I look more like the girls he used to masturbate to. It just seems so incredibly two-faced. He gives me all these standard compliments, every fucking time, but he constantly gives me hints that he'd rather be fucking someone else.
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Me-teru no Kimochi
Eeeerr… it's definitely weird. He sounds a bit unhinged.
Maybe he takes pleasure in you being submissive, but mental pleasure, not sexual? Maybe it feeds his ego etc, but it's not arousing. That's just my speculation, but it looks like your problem stems from the bedroom.
Stop being a doormat in bed, if you ask for a change and he says it's okay as it is, say YOU need something different. Try being more dominant, maybe he'll find it hot?
ok I laughed at the anon saying "break up" but… srsly, break up. lol
something is certainly wrong with your relationship and I guess you feel it already
just ditch his weirdo ass
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See, I was right.
Usually if a guy has fetish for asians it's a red flag already. No chances should be taken.
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>In a relationship for 9 years.
>Bf starts calling me his fiancee last year because his lawyer said it would look better for his custody hearing for his kid.
>Bf has never proposed to me, never got me an engagement ring.
>Ask him if we're actually going to get married "Sure."
>Tell him he should at least get me an engagement ring or something.
>Tells me he doesn't know what I'd like.
>Send him links to ring sets that I like to give him an idea. Range is from $500-$1000.
>Birthday passes, Christmas passes, Valentine's Day passes, anniversary passes. Any significant dates pass and also a fucking year.
>Birthday is coming up again.
>"Maybe he's been saving up?"
>Comes home yesterday with a $6000 TV.
he doesn't want to marry you anon, and he never will of his own free will.
and the last thing you want to do is force someone into marriage that doesn't want it.
so you have to ask yourself: do you really want to get married? is it something that is important to you? do your values align with his?
it sounds like he's completely content with your current arrangement and is only leading you on a bout marriage to placate you.
We discussed it being a probable end goal when we moved in together after dating for 2 years, and it was brought up again at the 4 year mark because I was still wondering about it. Then not a peep until his lawyer tells him to start calling me his fiancee. >>204864
I did want to get married to him but now I'm seriously reconsidering it. I just feel like he's using me as a crutch for his custody case instead of actually wanting to marry me.
I would trust your instincts, whatever they may be anon. I really hope you follow through with whatever your own heart wants because 9 years is a very long time.
With my own personal anecdote, I've been with and living with my boyfriend for 7 years. At about the 4 year mark he continuously started bringing up marriage (in a cute way) saying how badly he wanted to marry me. Asking what kind of ring I'd want, etc. Being a cornball.
The thing is I do not ever plan on getting married. I don't believe in it for myself. And he knows that and understands and is fine living the rest of our lives without marriage.
But he always makes cute little comments like "I'll be here if and when you ever decide suddenly you want to do it".
I know my situation has nothing to do with yours and I hope it didn't come across the wrong way- I just wanted to let you know there are guys out there very into the idea of getting married.
samefag here but I wanted to reiterate that my key point is that I never led him on, was always very upfront about everything so that he could make his own decision on whether or not he wanted the relationship to continue. I never wanted to waste his time if it was a big deal to him.
What your significant other is doing seems cruel.
>Be out of state student
>In long distance relationship now/ all my friends are at home
>Moved here, made one actual true friend after some terms but most my friends are "classroom friends" if you know what I mean
>pretty lonely since she took this term off
>I'm friendly in general so I talk to most people in the area (like the cvs I'm always visiting everyone knows me by name)
>have a neighbor who I talk to and give my baked goods too, he's japanese so I get to practice with him and he loves being able to talk to me in general
>I mostly just make small talk as he's aware of the college I go to, and is extremely impressed since he has a successful friend who graduated from the school. So our conversations our mainly about how our day was and just "hows school"
>I should mention he's anywhere from 50-early 60 for sure, I'm guessing just due to him complaining about back problems and such.
>Saw he was outside, makes small talk
>He asks me if I want to go out for dinner, I get excited I haven't hung out with anyone for so long
>he gives number, and I'm visibly happy.
>Go home, tell boyfriend about how I can finally hangout with someone, he gets really upset because he says it's a date.
>I'm like lol he's old enough to be my dad for sure, he gets angry and I realize he's genuinely concern
I really just want to spend time with someone here, and hey it's a free dinner. Do you think my boyfriend is right to be upset?
I guess I'm not really looking for advice since I know I gotta end this shit but I at least need to rant.
I met a guy online, we became best friends best buds, we considered meeting and dating but snuffed the idea after discovering he wants kids and I do not. So we had a couple years of actually getting to know each other without weird girl/boy tension. Cool.
I got a bf, things went south, I decided to meet up with best friend since I was still in his country and had fuck all else to do. He was (and still is) sweet as can be and took care of me while I was miserable and never made a move. After a month of living together we kissed for the first time and here's where things get iffy.
So I started noticing him as a potential bf during our first month together when he was taking care of me without fawning over me. Just being a stand up guy going out of his way for a friend. Never pressured or hinted at anything and never even made a semblance of a move. He admit he hadn't seen me that way either once we kissed so it was an odd turning point. After things started turning more into relationship material he's become very… feminine? He's extremely clingy, cuddly, like as subbish as one can get and he goes above and beyond for me. He makes little cute moan whimper sounds when he's cuddling and wants my attention. These things can be nice but with him it's always a lead in for sex. If a boy is being cute with me I just want to cuddle and maybe flirt the way up to sex so it's really gotten annoying having him just acting and talking like a little kid and being surprised when I'm drier than a desert. Side note: originally I was on the fence about physical attraction to him since he's basically anorexic skinny and a bit shorter, face not my preferred type etc. petty nonsense shit. We had about a month of banging where those things mattered not because he was cool and it's great realizing you love your best friend.
The things I mentioned gradually started to worry me but I was drinking a lot at the time so I guess I just shoved my concerns under the rug of alcohol. I came back to my country, he still continued the cuteness game while still trying to make it a sexual thing and I realized my vagina is pretty much clamped up for good. I did promise to visit him again in fall and well, here I am. I thought I owe him the decency of an explanation or to test the waters to see if anything's fixable.
We had some issues since he realized I was a bit distant and he said he cried about it and I feel awful. But after doing my best to politely explain that well… fuck, I want to feel like I'm dating a man and this isn't working for me, it seems he may be desperately trying to fix things by doing the things I dislike in doubletime. He's told me he loves me in his language with a baby voice while wiggle cuddling and I just can't be doin' with this. I adore when the person I'm dating is "switches roles" and lets me take care of them but this extreme clinginess is not my thing.
This super sucks. I don't want to be a heartless asshole and especially not towards my best friend but we've had sex twice since I've been here and it's been such a chore.
I was doing a workout plan that I found and tailored for myself using a bunch of resources online, I kept it up for months but I was just getting a worse body instead of my dream body. It was 30 minutes of cardio at varying intensity, then about an hour of weights without breaking for whatever body part it was that day. Monday was legs, Tuesday was Arms, so on. My ass vanished within a few weeks and I kept hoping it was the fat vs muscle and that the muscle would come in but after half a year I just wanted to cry from my new Bobby Hill ass. My upper abdominals under my breasts bulked out from muscle and I constantly looked bloated but my lower stomach got saggier and lower on my body to where I almost had a fupa but never got much smaller in fat. The cellulite on my legs was horrific, it went from the very backs under my butt to all throughout my legs and I looked terrible. My legs didn't lose any fat or change shape, even the fat pockets up were my thigh gap is. I just broke out with cellulite like a teenager and zits.
A lot of it was just YMMV I figured out. I'm too quad dominant for squats to work out my butt or hips, I have too bad a hip flexor for other shit, etc. In the end it was a bunch of people arguing over what % of protein your diet needed, if squats did or didn't work, if cardio was killing your workout.
I basically now just to mild things like walking 45-60 minutes a day at least, leg lifts while I'm sitting at work, and resistance band upper body stuff while watching tv. I stopped watching my diet and just ate what I wanted but made sure I didn't overeat my calories.
LOL this really killed me anon
But seriously I've used uber a lot and it's felt really safe, only take rides from 4.5*+
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I applied for a travel in Iceland with erasmus+ (I'm European), I already did it once a year ago and I've had a great time so I wanted to go again.
A guy from my country that was in my team last year is now part of the team of the organization that runs the event.
A girl I know and I'm friends with on Facebook is a very close friend of this guy. I was notified via email that I wasn't chosen for this travel/event a week ago. And the guy was the one who notified me on the association's behalf, so it appears they made the selection a week ago…
And yet, this girl has been publicly boasting about "going to Iceland" for 2-3 months.
Also, she doesn't speak English (required for the event) and she's not into the topic of the event (also required), so it's really weird that she was chosen.
If 2+2=4, the guy must have promised her a place between the 4 people they had to choose and she will see a place she has little knowledge of, where she won't be able to communicate with the other partecipants except of the ones from my country because she doesn't speak English, in an event which topic doesn't really interest her.
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So today I was logged out of Google from my Gmail account and I totally forgot about my password because I was logged in all the time SO now I can't log in because all the option for re-set my damn password DON'T WORK so I'm totally FUCKED because with that dumb email I was signed to all my important accounts and now I just want to fucking kill myself because I have to make a new email and loose everything I had with the old one FUKC THAT SO MUCH I'M SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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>middle of september
>still 40 degrees outside
ENOUGH WHEN WILL THE FALL COME I FUCKING HATE THIS HEAT
Sadly no, I wrote with some dude from google about this but he gave me the same answer I already read on the support page which made me even more angry. They are like, well if this doesn't work, then you have to make a new one :)))
Fuck this so much, I'm so fucking mad right now d a m n
>>205078>then you have to make a new one
Ugh that's so annoying. I hate how people assume that's an option and that you don't have important things and important website accounts tied specifically to the address.
I had an ex who harassed me on my Google account years ago and even police wouldn't do anything about it back then, and the answer from some people was "just make another account" as if my ex shouldn't have just stopped harassing me in the first place! He did eventually, but god damn.
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As of recently, I'm trying to get better at my art and post often and recently a friend of mine had also gotten one. It was cool but then she made one to write fanfictions for Markiplier,Jackcepticeye,and all those other fucks. She actually managed to get quite a few followers.
She posted fanart (her art is middle school level at best) of one of them on her main tumblr and managed to get 1k notes on it and he even re blogged it.
I'm not even going to hide my salt here but jesus fucking christ, sometimes I wonder if it's even worth going through the trouble of getting good and trying to draw fanart all the time to get noticed. If immature weeb art level fucks like her can get notes on a piece of shit fanart like what she posted, it honestly makes me wonder if it's worth it. It's petty, but it makes me so mad that all you have to do is appeal to the right people/fandom and boom you get followers/an audience/supporters whatever.
I've been having a tough time with my art/art style already and this shit is making me lose hope
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No, you're right
It's super easy to get caught up with followers and what not
Art is fun but so self defeating>>205085
this was the response I needed
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I get where you're coming from. A following has a lot of perks: they give feedback, they support you, they can make you feel like it was worth it in a sense. Hell, having a following means that you can even just open a Patreon and have people throw money at you for doing what you like. You can work on it step by step, through hashtags, bandwagoning on the most popular shows etc. but try not to make it an obsession, because that's when people lose interest in what they do and the quality starts dropping
With kids it should be easier. They don't judge you or think you're weird, you can just be yourself around them. Talk to them in a simple way so they understand you, play with them and don't worry.
Did you graduate in the education field?
It makes sense that it would be easier but I've always had trouble with it. :/ The thing is that "myself" is just a ball of anxiety and depression, so I think the reason is that its hard for me to pretend to be cheery and sweet like you should be with kids. I'm just…not like that.
And nope not in education. I graduated with a fine arts degree, and this job is technically 'in my field' but it's not creative in the least. Which is fine for me right now, because I've had a lot of trouble finding a job period. And I figure it will give me time to focus all of my creativity on personal projects and see if those take off.
I work in childcare, and felt the same way when I first started. You will get the hang of it. Getting along with the kids is one thing, but more important is looking out for their safety. Have safety in mind, and take action to report and/or prevent risks. Whoever your superiors are will take notice.
The best way to get along with most children (under 10) is to be their audience. Ask them about their favourite game, their pets, their family, etc. and really listen to their responses. Pretty soon you'll be surrounded by the little bastards pulling at your clothes and saying "watch this!! Look what I can do!!"
I can't stand my bestfriend anymore. The problem is that if I cut him off of my life, I'll lose all my other close friends.
I met him when I was finishing high school (10 years ago) and I was completely alone due to family problems and shitty people around me (basically, fake friends who couldn't care less about me even if they tried). And we had some special connection. He was having problems with their friends too (who he had known for more than 20 years) and troubles with himself because he's gay and he just got out of the closet.
For the first year, he became an essential part of my life, he gave me the support I needed and I did the same with him. But then we started school, he introduced me to his friends and that's where it all went shit.
I always knew he's an egocentric and self-centered person but I didn't have any problem with that, as I have low self-esteem and I kind of admired his personality. But he's also very, vey jealous of his friends. They liked me and wanted to hang around with me and I understood that this could make him angry somehow because he was with him since he was a child and I didn't want to feel like I was excluding him, so I didn't meet his friends if he wasn't around, or I tried not to talk to them as much as him.
However, he always got an excuse to throw shade at me on Twitter, to stop talking to me and calling me crazy when I asked him what was wrong, and just acting as if I was a nuisance. The thing is that he did it in such a way that I actually believed I was crazy or boring. I couldn't stand the idea of being alone again, so I endured so much shit of him. Some of his friends told me (years later) that when we're together with them, it's like I disappear, because I don't talk too much, I don't join too much, etc.
This went on for more than seven years. The truth is that I felt guilty and bad almost all the time, because I truly thought I was doing something wrong. He never told me what bothered him (he's the proudest boy I've ever met, he'd die before telling me he's afraid of me being better than him at something), but it was so obvious, I became paranoid about saying the wrong thing or meeting someone when I wasn't supposed to or something.
It came to a point where I felt guilty of not telling him E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. As I was lying to him. And when I told him these things, he used to tell me that I didn't owe him any kind of explanation lmfao when actually he got pissed if I didn't tell him.
Obviously, his friends became my friends too after a few years and to this day they're my closest ones. Two years ago, I stopped caring about his reactions that much. I finally saw how toxic our relationship was, specially considering he's only my bestfriend.
Right now, I just feel tired and anxious about our friendship. I feel like I'm always doing things to please him, always available when he wants to meet or he needs someone to, i.e., go shopping. When we're fine, I feel extremetely grateful for him and I remember all those things that made him my friend at the beginning, I know I owe him my friend's group and he's a big part of my life, period. But when we're bad (I mean, when HE'S bad, not talking to me, being shady or just ''meh'' about everything I told him), I remember why I'm starting to become this tired and bitter about this whole situation.
I actually became more distant in the past years, I stopped caring that much and I actually saw how he is, but as I said, he's super passive-agressive and tries to make a joke of everything he does / says to me so he doesn't show his true colours to any of our friends, so they don't know at all how shit he is with me. They tried to calm down things sometimes (when he joked about me in front of them) but they don't know, of course, how many ''ok'' I can get in one of our conversations, or how he lefts me on read when something pissed him off but doesn't want to tell me so I become anxious about what exactly I did wrong. I know it may sound silly but he knows exactly what hurt me (because some of my old exfriends did it) and still does it.
Also, he's not the same person I've met. Now he's always bitch-talking about everyone and everything, he became so fake, I can't understand it. He's always making plans with people who treat him like shit and rants about it with us and then we have to see photos of them as if nothing has happened.
And who I'm trying to fool, they've been friends for more than twenty years and he didn't do anything wrong to them at all, they'd pick his side and I just know it. One couple broke up a few years ago after more than 4 years of relationship and that kind of separated our group in two, so I know this would be similar or worse.
TLTR; my ''bestfriend'' is an asshole but we have the same friends group and if I cut him off, I'd be completely alone kek
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I've lost a lot of love for my bf. here goes.
>just moved into new flat 3 days ago
>refreshing since our old place was a nightmare
>everything is amazing, we get intimate
>I never face away from him during sex bc i like to look at him but I thought we'd change things up
>I turn back around to see his phone closer to him than normal
>finish him up quickly and grab his phone
>first img is a picture of my ass and vagina
>about 3 imgs, granted they were quite dark and you wouldn't really know it was me
>confront right away
>I tell him even though we've been together for so long this shit is WAY WAYYYY over the line for me, im not into any kind of nudes at all
>He is BEGGING for my forgiveness on the floor
>i delete all pics, double and triple check just incase, including snapchat
>This was the night before my first ever job, didn't sleep a wink
>he's still begging for my forgiveness
>I know he wouldn't have ever shared them anywhere he's not that kind of guy, he would keep it to himself but to take pics without my permission or acknowledgement really upsets me.
>3 weeks have now gone by, zero sex. I just can't bring myself to do it
>I can barely hug and kiss him anymore, i know i still love him
>I still have very little trust even after talking it all out and forgiving him
>I can't fucking get over it
>I just want to show my bf the love he deserves for genuinely putting so much effort into cleaning up his act
>when it comes it kissing and hugging I always hold back now
I really don't want to break up with him but I just don't feel as if i love him as much as i did before this. I need to get over myself, I know what he did was mega shit but we talked for DAYS about it and he has shown so much remorse and been extremely apologetic. He's 100% not a chad or a gross guy that would do this and share it around but it's something that crosses the line so much for me..
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this made me feel bad. i hope you either get over it or dump him, i just hope you feel better soon
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>paid vacation week is starting and I don't feel like cooking
>"Bf let's order Chinese."
>"Really anon? What's with you and takeout lately? We need to go grocery shopping."
>apparently I don't cook enough
>like the homemade ramen and pork belly I made at the beginning of the week
>then pork dumplings
>then fried squid
>then a beef pot roast
>then a spinach pizza
>each meal lasting a couple days in the fridge as leftovers
>bf never cares because he eats at his restaurant job
>mfw the only "takeout" we've done is a sushi restaurant last night and Taco Bell I think last week
He's so fucking dumb sometimes, and I think he secretly gets a lot of fast food during work and that's why he thinks we eat more takeout. Because I friggin don't.
But whatever, I ordered the damn food anyway.
in all honesty, i am too afraid to go to the police for the sake of being judged. i didn't try to hurt him, i cried and said no but i never really fought back.
i feel disgusting, i can't bring myself to go to the police.
as to who it was, we had known each other two weeks and he asked me to meet on a local park so we. could walk to college together (UK college, we're both in our second years) and I thought nothing from it. I didn't think there was anything off about him…
I'm so sorry anon, you have no idea. You said no. And you cried. He didn't stop. You did NOTHING wrong, he did. I understand why you're scared and afraid but you have to be strong now, don't think only about what happened to you (which is horrible), think that you can prevent it to happen again. I'm sure what you're suffering it's terrible, but you have to be strong now and remind yourself that it wasn't your fault, you didn't fought back because you weren't expecting what was going to happen and that's completely normal. Please, please, go to the police, tell your story, tell all the details and take care of yourself.
I'm sending you all my strenght.
>>205186>I'm so jealous of girls who have good relationships with their mothers.
Same anon. Things will get better when you move out.
I remember when I lived at home that I could expect to be yelled at or bitched about something everyday when I came back after school. My mom would do shit to hurt my trust like read through my diary while holding me back, and shaming me about certain things. She constantly criticized me and made me feel bad for being myself. When I acted out and rebelled she would wonder why. Never felt I could talk to her about anything, and to this day I give her a watered-down version of my life happenings because to say anything personal and have it criticized/insulted would hurt me like in the past.
It's like the second I hit pre-pubescence around middle school, my mother treated me like a shit there on out. One time she yelled at me "I WISH I HAD A DAUGHTER WHO WOULD ACT NICELY IN ALL THE OTHER MOTHER AND DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIPS I SEE," not realizing that she raised me this way and she's mostly to blame.
Even hugging her and kissing her cheek feels so artificial and forced because she simply never fostered that kind of relationship with me after I turned 10.
You actually did a fucking brosplit? Lol you fucked up. Full body 3 times a week, and actually lift heavy and eat more.
You aren't quad dominant, you just have no ass, literally. Your ''ass'' is all fat, you have no muscle there. So do some barbell hipthrusts to do something about it ffs. Your true ass is atm Hank Hill's, because it's all lardy fat. And unless you are 300 lbs, don't do bodyweight, ACTUALLY PICK UP SOME FUCKING WEIGHTS. And not those 5 lbs dumbbells, as heavy as you can.
Omfg are you me? I made a promise to myself to never talk to my mother once I finally move out. I'm such a trusting, nice person and I keep letting her back into my life. I'm pretty lonely and I think it'd be nice to have a relationship with someone in my family so we can go shopping, cook together, watch films…but that's just a fantasy.
>My mom would do shit to hurt my trust like read through my diary
Mine does the same. She's previously read through my texts and gotten my siblings to show her my facebook profile. She'll comment on things she shouldn't know just to remind me that she has the POWER to stalk me. I feel like when I move out she'll regularly show up at my apartment unannounced.
>She constantly criticized me and made me feel bad for being myself.
100% and I think it was worst during puberty. Like she was shaming me for growing up. She didn't like it when I wore makeup. She especially didn't like it when I gained weight because it damaged HER image. I think that's the only reason why mothers care about their daughters "rebelling". She'd tell me in great detail all the things that were ugly on me and I fucking hate her for doing that because I can never forget them. I still hear her nasty little voice every time I get dressed in the morning or every time I feel an ounce of confidence.
>Even hugging her and kissing her cheek feels so artificial and forced because she simply never fostered that kind of relationship with me after I turned 10.
Exact same thing happened with me. She was never close to me when I was a child but suddenly she started demanding I kiss her on the cheek in front of other people to make it seem like we were close. She'd act hurt when I was awkward about it. One day she's trying to be a "cool mom" and try to "hang out" with me (which is really just a way for her to get me to trust her so I'll open up about things she'll use against me later) and the next minute she's screaming at me for being a waste of space, fat, lazy demon. I don't even know why people like this have children. Like when you know you're a terrible human being who hates other people, just get your tubes tied.
Hope you're doing well now, anon xxx
Is it possible to be a nice, likeable person without actually attracting friends? I like to be nice to people, and pleasant to work with, but I really don't like people. Just being my quiet, boring self at work had garnered a few work "friends" over the last few months. It was nice to chitchat with them every few days, and that was ALL that I wanted and nothing more. Then one of them wanted to hang out, and I said yes, because I can't say no. There's no good way of telling some one you've been friendly talking with for a few months that, no, you aren't free Friday to play tennis with him and his girlfriend . God, I hate "hanging out" with people my age. I feel like so many people my age act no differently than teenagers, and it becomes especially apparent when "hanging out." One of the friends quickly super annoying. They never shut up and go on and on about normie pastimes like vaping and sports plays. Some of the things they said to me I ended up wanting to slap them for, and everything snowballed until one day I got clearly irritated with every asshole thing they did. And I got stuck being clearly irritated with them for days afterward because I couldn't just forgive and forget. They've got the message now, and don't sit with me at lunch now. And now I just feel really bad about it. And this is one of the reasons I hate friends. I inevitably get annoyed with them, can't forget it, and you can't just dump a friend so easily. I end up feeling awful about getting annoyed and not being patient with them. Sometimes I feel like they're emotionally draining and trying to take advantage of me, and feel bad that I get annoyed about that too.
The other friends all end up wanting to all hang out together, and do a bunch of teenage tier things like sit on the couch till 3 am and watch YouTube videos and get drunk on weekdays. I end up leaving only after an hour because I can't put up with it.
I don't even get why they bother inviting me, I really don't have much in common with them. I think they're desperate for as many friends as possible sometimes. One of them I thought was a cool person, till I hung out with them alone. I've ranted before about it. They acted inappropriately. I'm so sick of meeting people I think are one way, and then turn around and betray my trust.
Sorry for my cringey rant.
I'm the same way, anon. I don't mind being friendly and nice to coworkers but also keep them at arms length by not talking about myself too much and declining any offers to communicate outside work.
There's nothing wrong with just simply saying no to offers. You don't owe anyone an explanation as to why not. A simple "no, but thanks for the offer" is enough. Decline enough and they will simply stop asking.
It's possible, but really hard without people taking it so personally. I am also a really polite and nice person at work, it's sort of like a facade that clicks on the second I clock in. Yet deep down I'm kind of a loner and behave really different outside of work.
I too like polite conversation at work, but I was never interesting in becoming friends with my coworkers because they're either way older than me or have different things going on like kids that I can't possibly relate to. Problem is, people take kindness and politeness so personally that they think I'm being that way for their sake and that it's not just in my nature to be so towards most everyone.
>>205216>I pretended to be like them>But how dare they think I'm like them!
Anon you sound like a confused old person who is doing stupid things and getting angry at the stupid results.
I think you sound conceited and awful but I do get what it's like when people with nothing in common with you try to make you talk. People will survive you if you politely decline their offers, nobody wants to waste their time getting to know someone who will ghost them anyway so safe both of you the hassle and learn to say what you mean. If you're worried about them not getting it then wear headphones whenever you are alone, have a book with you at lunch and stick to telling people that you're going to the gym or to get caught up on videogames after work. To begin with people might take it personally that you've swapped personas but eventually they will just accept that you're the friendly loner. Be firm and learn to repeat yourself whilst smiling e.g. "yes I'm just finishing this chapter before lunch ends….Yes, I'm just going to finish this chapter now before lunch ends".
Thank you for understanding where I'm coming from. I can't ever talk about this with my family. My mom would never let me hear the end of it. It's such a huge relief to know other people feel that way.
I can't just say no. It sounds so stupid, but I've never been able to. I know that I'm disappointing them and feel like I'm being horribly mean by declining their offers. I really realize what a problem it is now that you both bring it up. Is it alright if I ask if you ever feel bad about saying no? Do you have excuses you give? When I give excuses, (which I do a lot) like I'm too tired or I'm grocery shopping after work, they still don't get the message and keep asking. >>205230
I never pretended to be like them, and have no intention of acting like them. I'd really say I'm the complete opposite of most of them. I'm sorry that's how my post was interpreted. Could you please explain how I'm a confused old person in more detail? I understand how I came across as conceited, but I know I'm any better than them. Sucking it up and just telling them no is probably one the most difficult things in the world, but thank you for the advice. >>205266
Of course I have problems.
I feel you. I don't hate her, but I feel like my life would be 100x better without her around. I actually started regressing after I came back home after a couple of years away and some confidence gains. >>205188>I remember when I lived at home that I could expect to be yelled at or bitched about something everyday when I came back after school. My mom would do shit to hurt my trust like read through my diary while holding me back, and shaming me about certain things. She constantly criticized me and made me feel bad for being myself. When I acted out and rebelled she would wonder why. Never felt I could talk to her about anything, and to this day I give her a watered-down version of my life happenings because to say anything personal and have it criticized/insulted would hurt me like in the past.
>It's like the second I hit pre-pubescence around middle school, my mother treated me like a shit there on out. One time she yelled at me "I WISH I HAD A DAUGHTER WHO WOULD ACT NICELY IN ALL THE OTHER MOTHER AND DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIPS I SEE," not realizing that she raised me this way and she's mostly to blame.
Even hugging her and kissing her cheek feels so artificial and forced because she simply never fostered that kind of relationship with me after I turned 10.
This and this. She's pissy that I never hug/kiss her, but she never wonders why. It's like she's completely unaware, as if her brain shuts down whenever she's doing something wrong (which is almost all the time). When confronted, she denies EVERYTHING, gets very aggressive if you keep talking about it and if you don't shut up she beats you. I used to be confident, bubbly, and charismatic. Now I'm a bubble of insecurity because of her daily attacks on my self esteem.
But then she will start blaming me for being insecure. You can't win with that woman.
I have a little sister, somehow my mom wasn't as bad to her as she was to me so they bonded more. She always defends her and spoils her, while guilt tripping me for not showing all that affection my sister shows her, even though it's because of her behavior, she's the one who ruined our relationship. Hell, I was terrified of her when I was a child, she fucking strangled me when she was mad at me for shit like a bad grade or me accidentally spilling the milk on the floor, and she did it more than once. I guarantee that if I tried to confront her about it now, she will deny everything and say that I'm crazy and that I want to send her to jail.
Everything I do is not good enough, all the other girls are better than me, I'm a failure (in my early twenties?), I'm just like my father (they're divorced) blah blah blah. And she has the weird habit of "teaming up" with my sister against me, when my sister is not even present at the moment. Like "Go to sleep when WE do, WE don't want you to disturb US" when my sister didn't even care.
i dated this guy for like 9 months, so not that long, but it was fairly serious. there were red flags from the start but i'm a goddamn idiot and just ignored them. he emotionally abused me the entire time, he made me feel fucking crazy. we would get in fights and somehow he would completely flip stories around, everything was my fault. i stayed over at his house once and he left early to go to work. I had the day off so i just hung around. when he came home from work he immediately started yelling at me bc i didn't make him food, but he didn't even ask me to?? i kept saying that i would've done it if i had known but he would just keep yelling and that i should've known to make him food when he got home from work! he would make up shit like that. he would yell literally at the top of his lungs at me. sometimes he would just nit pick me for up to an hour at a time and i'd be crying and he'd just be calling me pathetic and a drama queen for crying. he only told me negative things about myself. i'm pretty good looking tbh but he completely destroyed all of my confidence by tearing down my appearance every single day, i'm so insecure and i have no real "self" anymore and i'm jealous and bitter towards everyone now. he would tell me he looks at other girls just to make me upset i think. one day he assaulted me because i read him a news headline. he doesn't like our country's president and likes to not be aware of what's happening in the world, apparently. i read the headline and he started getting madder and arguing with me and it escalated and he grabbed me and pushed me out of the room, he took my phone, he locked me outside in the snow with no shoes, he threatened to throw my phone in a puddle of melted snow, he let me back inside and he corners me into a kitchen corner and he is in my face yelling at me and his face is so fucking crazy from the rage and he leaves the kitchen and i'm standing there shaking and crying and trying to call an uber home and he storms back out again like 45 seconds later and corners me again and he's yelling at the top of his lungs right in my face again very aggressively and i'm saying nothing and i instinctively put my hands up in front of my face bc i'm so scared and he grabs me by the wrists and throws me across the kitchen, my glasses literally flew off my face. i'm a 5'1" 105lb girl and he is a 6' ~170lb man. i was literally covered in bruises. sorry that was so long but i literally like had a flashback as i wrote that my heart is racing. i ended up going back to him after that which was the dumbest thing i ever did. he had another freakout, not as bad and ended up dumping me (for another stupid minor reason). i'm glad he did bc i don't think i ever would've left that relationship, i'm really afraid of change. there's something wrong with me where i keep dating people who emotionally abuse me and i don't know why. anyway if anyone read this whole thing thanks i really appreciate someone like..listening. i can't talk to anyone about this
Fucking same. I hate how fake people is with me, how they always take advantadge of me, how when I stop caring that much I'm the bad one because I don't put enough interest in others, but when I do care I feel rejected or ignored.
I'm tired of trying to be nice all the time when people couldn't care less about me or, worse, makes me feel like shit for ''worrying to much'' about it. Sometimes all I need is to feel that someone cares for me the same way as I do, I just need someone to ask me how my fucking day went, or wanting to see me once in awhile. I'm so sick of fake ass people trying to be passive-agressive and acting all innocent when I confront them. I'm not dumb, I can see throught their lies and I fucking hate myself sometimes because I can't stop feeling guilty for wanting to believe them.
I really get where you're coming from with the whole "saying no" shit. Personally, I was abused as a kid and learned to put myself on the back burner for everyone else, which led to a lot of feelings of guilt and shame if I said no to anyone about anything.
What helped me climb out of that mentality was understanding the root of why I felt guilty and then realizing that I matter just as much as the person I want to say no to. My feelings, wants, and needs are just as valid as theirs. I have the right to say no, without explanation, and eventually, I just bulldozed over any guilt by saying "fuck you" to it and to the person if they tried to make me feel bad.
As far as giving excuses, like I said, you don't need to give one. If someone asks you to hang out or do something specific, you literally just say "no, thanks, I think I'm going to pass." If they press you excessively, be stern and just say that you don't want to and end the discussion. If they try to make you feel bad or are starting to be a dick about it, why would you even feel guilty at that point, especially if you don't even want to hang out with them? They're obviously assholes not worth your time.
All in all, it sounds like you just need to up your confidence by a lot, girl.
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>sleeping like a baby
>suddenly wake up with a pain I have never felt in my life in my kidney
>vomit a couple of times
>go to ER
>doctor says I'm passing a kidney stone
Jesus christ I pray to god that no one ever deals with this shit, I have never felt this much pain in my life and I got stabbed two times, it was small time compared to this. Hoping it'll pass fast because I don't think I can handle this shit without daily buscopan injections.
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Is there anyone here who lives a relatively solitary lifestyle by choice and is happy?
I have had very bad social anxiety my entire life. (I fit all of the symptoms of Avoidant personality disorder, but I've never been diagnosed so I try not to read too much into that. It is kind of hard not to though.) I only had one friend throughout high school, but it was a very unhealthy relationship and five years after graduating I have finally cut ties with her. Surprisingly, I'm not lonely or upset at all. I've never had any kind of romantic relationship, exc. My lack of social life and normal progression bothered me all throughout high school and the first two years of college. But now the thing is that…it doesn't. And I feel like it still should. However, I just can't bring myself to care.
I am probably going to resume therapy sometime next month after ~six years without it, so I don't know if that will change anything. But I'm just kind of happy being alone now. I know that isn't healthy, but at this point I just feel like if I'm content by being alone why should I try to force myself to live a
'normal' life just to feel like I'm living right?
The part that makes me pause a little bit is that I'm only 22, so I assume that I know nothing about life. I know that I don't. Even though I'm content right now, will that kind of life bite me in the ass ten years down the road? I never wanted marriage/children so that isn't really an issue for me..I'm more worried about friends in general. Maybe a romantic relationship if I can find someone who is ok with a severe introvert (to a fault) who has no interest in those things either.
I know I have a lot of issues that have gone ignored for years now, because I just can't bring myself to get help. I used to be extremely depressed and sad all the time, but now I'm just numb to everything. I'm never happy, I'm never sad, I never cry. I would say I'm still depressed but it comes in the form of complete numbness, indifference, and lack of motivation. I'm wondering if my view on socializing and relationships has taken a similar turn. Like I've gone so long without them that now I'm so used to the feeling that it's comfortable for me, despite it not being good.
I don't know. Just don't know.
>>205424>But I'm just kind of happy being alone now.
This is fine and not a red flag for mental/emotional issues in itself, but>I'm never happy>I would say I'm still depressed but it comes in the form of complete numbness, indifference, and lack of motivation.
makes it sound like it's affecting you worse than you realize.
I have barely any friends but I am happy and in a good mood most of the time, so I don't think my lack of a social life reflects any deeper issues. But in your case, don't you just need to spend some more time being social to figure out if it's something that helps you or not? If it improves your mood, keep doing it. If not, feel free to give it up.
>>205424>I used to be extremely depressed and sad all the time, but now I'm just numb to everything. I'm never happy, I'm never sad, I never cry.
That is a form of severe depression, where people lose all emotions. If you cannot feel happiness, how can you state that you feel happy with your current lifestyle?
I'm worried you're a bit in denial, Anon, and you kinda know it. Just like you said, you're too cocooned in your lifestyle you don't have the courage to change. You haven't experienced what good friendship and relationship could be, so you convince yourself that you're content.
For centuries, social isolation has been a test or a punishment. People had to go through it to see if they're strong enough not to come out, well, broken.
The monks you see that live in huts alone, have decades of spiritual journey behind them and have decided to do it by choice, not because they are unable to form relationships.
So, please, don't start off negative that therapy won't help you. Try with small steps. Go for a walk every day or try going to group exercises. If you can, get blood test and see which vitamins you're lacking. Try connecting to people on the internet at least. My parents are very controlling and I was very isolated so I've found many good friends and even my boyfriend on the internet. If you have some hobbies, connect to the people online about them.
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I just want to have a steamy make out session with a girl goddammit
I'm so sexually frustrated rn, I need a hug or something
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I'm so sick of being alive and being worthless and dumb. I wish I was somebody else.
Everything is just so fucking sad.
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>told a bridesmaid-zilla off in our bridal group chat after she had been frustrating people for a really long while
>she was being a shit to us and treating us badly despite us and the MoH doing all the planning
>a literal unwarrantedsenseofselfimportance.jpeg
>never contributed anything but criticized every plan/venue and was being annoying
>said she deserved to be MoH and not our good friend
>said our bride thought we weren't doing anything for her and that she had secret knowledge she was privy to that we were not
>that def was a lie
>called her out on the bs and lies so badly she left the chat
>tfw everyone agrees that she deserved it and it was savage af
Not sure if she'll try to play victim to the bride behind our backs, but whatever. It's us against her.
That's good anon. I'm trying to be more like that.>>205513
lol I can relate>>205473
You said she wanted to be tucked in? I can understand some people not wanting to be tucked in, but if she said she did, then her reaction confsues me.
If he wants to fuck her that badly, he can go back to her. Anon, you deserve better than someone who still cries over their ex.
Plus it's your body, you want to do body mods? Do them. Want to use whitening cream? Do it.
Anon I'm glad you're away from him. Do you have many friends? It's good to have a friend who will just tell you if you're dating someone that raises red flags, but if you don't have anyone to talk to then please come here next time you're unsure about a guy. You will get conflicting feedback but it's better than nothing>>205473
Learning from her differences without just pitying her sounds good anon, it's nice that you have her back whilst she's pulling herself up from a bad situation>>205513
You, me and everyone in that lesbian fantasy thread anon >>205520
pear shaped japanese pale ex? I'm sure you've posted about this before anon, cut him loose
There was a girl I was best friends with several years, but lately I feel like she's been flakey. I recently became much closer with another girl. We didn't get along for a long time, but due to some circumstances we ended up living together for a while, which was enjoyable, and now my friend makes time to talk to me every week even though she is busy with grad school.
Friend #1, I haven't heard her voice for a couple of months. I said she was free to call me because she mentioned feeling lonely, but I feel like she won't take my offer. I don't feel like she is obligated to talk to me, but I wish there was a way to remind her that friendship is what you put into it.
This weekend, she wanted me to drive over to her place for her birthday, but it would have taken 8 hours round trip, and I just didn't have the time. I did appreciate the invitation, but even if I did have some more time, I still don't feel like it would be worth the effort to drive there, considering how much I hate driving.
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I have to shave my face every day otherwise I grow a literal neckbeard.
My hormones are probably fucked up but I don't have the money or energy to go to specialists and even then I don't know if facial hair growth is something that I'd want to take medication for.
Shaving feels so masculine and gross but it's too much hair to realistically pluck or thread, and waxing breaks me out.
Just kill me.
Same, anon. I've had a mustache since I was 11 and now 10+ years later, I've got to shave my chin, cheeks, and upper lip every day. I have a permanent five o'clock shadow to go with it.
The worst part is that I've had numerous tests done to check for medical issues, hormonal imbalances, etc and everything is fine. I'm just hairy as fuck, I guess.
I've never had this happen so I didn't even know it was possibly to fake purchase things like that. I even went as far as contacting some of the sellers to see if they could provide me info, but after an Amazon support member told me all the "purchased items were marked as reserved", never purchased through Amazon(despite the client demanding I make a wish list and put the it's on it) they never used Amazon to buy it.
I agree, they should change it provide more info. I get if maybe you find the item cheaper else where, but how could you ever ship it to the person if you didn't know their address? I guess they don't factor in random strangers buying off your list, assuming these people already have them.
Shitty experience but least I learned it's possible.
My social circle kept complaining about this hostile bitch who decided to befriend one of our popular friends and thought she became a queen bee above us for doing so.
She would start talking down to us in conversations, saying things that made her sound good but actually doing the opposite, shittalking to her neutral friend in our group about others, telling us how much she cared about that popular friend and how we don't care enough etc. Weird bullshit like that.
The other day she became especially obnoxious and my friends started to PM me about what an annoying twat she was being while their chat was ongoing. The idiot was basically arguing with them about the popular friend again and it snowballed out of control. I was getting sick of my circle complaining about her but doing nothing.
I checked the conversation myself and tried to reason with the psycho twat. I mean I work in service so I'm pretty good at diffusing situations with dangerously stupid and unreasonable people. But she was legit crazy.
I hit so many nerves with her since the things I said made her feel cornered when she couldn't refute them. When she couldn't refute my points, she'd nitpick semantics. When nitpicking didn't work out, she repeated things like a broken record.
I said mockingly towards the end how she was just trying to be our friend's #1, and that sent her over the edge so bad she actually left our circle in a spiteful blaze of bitch fury.
What got my goat was that the 'neutral' friend with her actually had a panic attack after I stood up for them. I think because she honestly feared this person and she was being ferociously PMed by the twat. Still, it felt like bullshit that she had been complaining about this psychonaut to me so when I do something about it finally, it made her upset. Why even have a bitch for a friend like that though? Why care if she leaves?
So I text the twat giving her the opportunity to come back into our circle if she wanted to treat us better and do the right thing by her friend. Yet it turns out she's also a professional victim and chewed me out for the "STUNT" I pulled by (GASP) talking to her!! How I had been "rude" and that I'm "jealous" and "insecure" about her relationship with the popular friend. Also, that from now on bitch would talk through the neutral girl, because I guess bitches have ambassadors these days.
I blocked her crazy ass. This is a 29 year old woman starting a type of drama I haven't witnessed since high school…
Happy birthday anon! Sorry your friend is one of those self-important cosplayer types. They're all so stuck on themselves.
The drama cow I'm dealing with >>205730
is a cosplayer too, though not a good one.
Some people are just socially tone deaf and mean.
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>Blocked older brother on FB a few months ago
>due to him single handedly ruining my childhood over his grudge over my parents divorce.
>I'm the only family member that talks to both sides
>Been the messenger bird since i was 8 years old, shit gets tiring.
>I moved away from hometown
>My Mother has never missed my brothers bday, christmas, or easter gift and cards
>get a text from her to ask my brother or Dad to collect gifts for his birthday
>Ask and my brother point blank refuses since he "hates" her
>Hates her for no reason other than the divorce
>hasn't spoken to her at all in 10+ years
>Father point blank refused to pick them up due to him being too timid about it all
>here we fucking go again.jpg
>got rid of all connection with my brother, sick of him ruining my life even when i live so far away from it all.
>You try telling your own mother to not bother and bin the gifts for her fucking son because he hates her so much and refuses to even see her for 2 seconds.
>I unblocked him 2 days ago to lurk
>Turns out on FB you can' only re-block after 48 hours
>Forget about it
>Grandfather who has been very, very sick for years now, passed on yesterday
>I get informed at work, cry, tell boss and go home
>After talking with my Mother on the phone i calmed down a bit
>Ok now i have to tell my Dad and Brother,they have to know.
>Send a text, can't bare to ring them. I just calmed myself down
>Dad is very understanding as normal, ask him to inform my brother
>get a friend req on FB in a matter of mins
>It's my brother who i forgot to re-block
>ok, ill give him the benefit since it's a rough time
>first thing he says is why i blocked him
>he's really trying to start shit right now
>After getting upset again I went offline for the night
>wake up to msg about how much he loved that side of the fam and regrets not spending time with them
>Grandad has been sick for so many years that he knew he could pass at anytime
>kept everyone updated on that side of the family if they liked it or not
>told them that I was informed he might not make it over the weekend
>brother had "no time"
>fuck right off, blocked and ignored.
>Dont fucking talk to me ever again you cunt.
No they just said "2 hours is nothing" when I said I was annoyed we didn't talk and they said they wouldn't play games and they did. The logic of "but I stopped so it doesn't matter"
And then me asking when we could talk, "not yet." Asking when we could got "don't know." as a reply. I ended up saying I didn't have long to talk but I guess to just play their games then and they got pissed asking what they were supposed to do. I said to stick to what they said and talk to me and not play games when they swore they wouldn't. Suddenly I'm possessive, and when I said it was hurtful for them to say that, "I'm not dealing with this."
They left, I had a breakdown and snapped and lost control and just screamed at them for it and got blocked. GG me.
Was just going to say that.>>205834
Your SO blocked you? Are you LD or IRL? That's a really weird/bad relationship dynamic.
I'm reaching my breaking point with a good friend of mine.
Sometime last year I made a private Discord server for my friends and me to chat in. Under normal circumstances, the criteria for an invitation is knowing me for a while (average is about 5-6 years) and being over the age of 21 (average age is 27). I broke my own rules and allowed a newer friend in after some drama went down on another server. They were mistreating her for rather dumb reasons and I felt sorry, so I let her into mine so she wouldn't feel so dejected. While I don't regret it at all I really, really wish she wasn't so sensitive so I could just tell her my grievances straight up. I should have known better as a lot of the problems people had with her on the other server are beginning to manifest in mine.
She's very sweet and nice and I genuinely care for her and enjoy being her friend but her insecurity is beginning to drive me crazy. For the most part, she's well-liked on the server, but people do have an issue with some of her tendencies. She's a stay-at-home mother and her husband works full-time, so she's always alone with her kid. I'm not personally bothered by it, but I know for a fact that a few of the other users in the channel very much are. Most of the people on the server don't even like children, let alone want to hear one constantly screaming in the background. She goes on push-to-talk when it gets bad, but she can't exactly turn her child off. To her credit, she does apologize for it and I'm sure it will get better once her kid grows up and learns to be a bit quieter but the fact that her child is screeching compounds with everything else that comes with along with her presence.
She has a bad habit of coming into our Discord server high or drunk. It isn't much of a problem when it's just she and I, but when there are multiple people she tends to dominate conversations or interrupt just to ask people to repeat or explain themselves because she's 'too blazed' or 'had a bit too much to drink'. Only one other person in our server drinks regularly, and when he does he often stays off the internet. Nobody smokes weed so we can't exactly relate to that either. She's a very talkative and boisterous drunk and when those inhibitions do down she often makes awkward or derailing comments, or just flat out starts complaining about whatever family member offended her this week. For hours. Then she goes to sleep.
She goes on these long tirades about her personal family issues as if we know and/or care about these people. If it's not that, then it's her running a joke she heard one of us make into the ground so hard that nobody else finds it funny or talking about what her kid did today. Nobody else in the server is a parent. Most of us dislike children. She's bored many a person to tears talking about how much and what her toddler ate today or how much her kid loves Elmo. It's cute for a while, but even I've begun to tune out when her baby's name gets brought up.
She often bemoans over how her she lost her figure post-baby and pines for her 'skinny' high school body. All the time, even though one look at her old photos shows that she's always been a bit on the heavier side. She also blames a high school ex she dated for 13 months for 'fucking her up' and leaving her an 'insecure mess'. According to her, he never assaulted her beyond pushing her around, which is horrible but not what I'd consider battering, was rude and very openly cheated on her with several girls. Even still, she didn't wise up until way after the fact. It's been over 10 years and she's still salty.
She's also a bit of a whiner. Having a child (unplanned) has cost she and her husband their entire social lives. They used to go to cons and bars and have fun with people their age and buy things, but now all they do is budget and take care of their kid. Even still, I hear nothing but her complaints and desires to do what she did before becoming a parent. I was about to pull my hair out the week of PAX because she would not shut up about wanting to go. Every other sentence out of her mouth was about how she wished she could go to PAX, how jealous she was of people who could go to PAX and her planning out loud ways she could try to go. It got really obnoxious. This repeats with almost anything else she wants that week. Make up, video games, etc.
Her husband is an okay guy. I haven't talked to him much, but from what she tells me she's having a bit of a crisis over his attraction to her. She seems to have picked up on my partner's absolute devotion to me. He's weaned himself off of porn (completely on his own, I had no say in it whatsoever) and only wants to be intimate to or with me, even when fapping. Her husband cannot say the same and has a definite preference when it comes to porn. A preference she does not physically fit into - and it really bothers her. She's always comparing herself to other girls, then doing this weird positive thing where she tries to talk herself up. Like "I may not be [insert pornstar she found on her husband's phone] but at least I have a kid that loves me and a husband!"
The pornstar thing is seriously grating. Not only did she snoop through her husband's phone looking for his porn stash, but after finding it she sat him down and tried telling him that his favorite porn star would never think twice about him, and how he would never have a chance with a girl like her. I mean, he's not exactly what I'd consider a catch (he seems to be very keen on getting her to lose weight and do cosplay despite being even fatter than her) but holy shit that's kind of fucked up. She acknowledges it herself, but does nothing beyond blaming it on her 'period hormones'. She's also quite jealous towards other girls in general (including me according to her, but I suppose I don't fall under the unwarranted hatred umbrella). When she acts up, I either correct her or completely ignore her but it does get really annoying. She wears her insecurities on her sleeve and gets a little boost out of imitating fictional characters she likes (wearing the same kind of glasses as Mei or styling her hair to imitate some anime girl). Normally I wouldn't consider this an issue but she really is trying so hard. I try to let her know that she's cute and pretty as much as I can, but it gets washed out by her self-loathing.
I know she's a good person and has proven it many times over but goddamn does she really need some parent friends who aren't part of her family and some self-esteem. I don't know how much longer we can deal with hearing about her kid's blowouts or how much she hates skinner women.
Sounds like she has a lot of issues.
But I don't know why you side with the husband so much towards the end. He sounds like an obese creep looking up porn on his phone and not communicating with the mother of his child about their marital issues.>she sat him down and tried telling him that his favorite porn star would never think twice about him
I lol'd. She's right you know.
She's 100% right and I hate men like that (even my husband calls him a loser) but I was trying to show how loco her jealousy can get. It's one thing to not like porn, but to go through someone else's phone snooping for it is a huge breach of privacy even if he is too much of a lame to communicate with her
I want to tell her that she shouldn't have to deal with a man who doesn't seem all that into her, but she gets super ancy when I imply that. They've been together since they were in school and ran away from Cali to Wash. state.
She did tell me that she 'made a mistake' and gave some guy a bj when she was still a barfly years ago but she claims to have never wanted to be with anybody else. Him and the kid are pretty much all she has.
She may breach his privacy, but it sounds like he has no problem breaching her trust. It's no wonder to me that she's a jealous, insecure mess.
I view obsessive porn watching as a form of infidelity that could eventually lead to bigger problems like irl affairs. Yes, everyone watches porn but it shouldn't be replacing intimacy or else it's a huge red flag. I pity her and understand where she's coming from.
Anyway, she sounds like a really sad person. I'm really not sure if there's much you could say to help her, unfortunately. It's a lost cause unless she's ready to leave him.
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>always wanted to go to Amsterdam bc never had the chance to see it in my life even when its not far away from where I live
>aks bf and fave travel buddy to come with me
>she says she has no money to travel rn
>friend wrote me today that she will spend New Year in Amsterdam with her friends for a few days
damn I'm a bit salty right now and I have a hard time being excited about her plans bc I feel left out and forgotten.
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Vaginismus Is fuckig up my shit man, I just wanna put things in my vagina, I couldn't even take my yeast infection cream like a human bean, I CAN'T EVEN HAVE SEX OR WEAR A TAMPON, FUCKING SHIT I FEEL BAD, LET ME FUCK MY BOYFRIEND
>>205844>Not only did she snoop through her husband's phone looking for his porn stash, but after finding it she sat him down and tried telling him that his favorite porn star would never think twice about him, and how he would never have a chance with a girl like her.
What is she expecting? Of course people jerk it to hot people. That just reads to me like shes trying to attack his self esteem so he's happy with her insecure ass. If she has issues about how he should be losing weight too, then by all means bring it up but that shit is just dumb. This relationship sounds like a shit show though, the comments about the ex makes me wonder if she was ever really that invested in the relationship to begin with.
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Last night there was a flight for older veterans coming home after a day trip to DC, and the entire atmosphere at the airport was absolutely cult-like. So many little flags, screaming and yelling as if everyone was at a giant concert, and legit eagle faces faded over american flags. Culty and corny af with these big fat moms and dads with their gross kids holding these cheap looking flags. I held up a sign and waved a flag anyway, since I knew it was make my family happy if I did. This morning my mother asks me if I had a good time last night, and not wanting to give her my honest opinion, I just tell her "yeah but it was kinda loud and too crowded". Her questions get more and more defensive about the event, eventually devolving into the "aren't you grateful they protect your freedom??" rhetoric. I tell her that isn't that I'm not grateful, its just I don't think that entire event is really that necessary or appropriate. I try and stay civil during the discussion, knowing that she is just overreacting (BTW she tried joining the army, but broke her leg in basic training and got an honorable discharge, so she was BARELY in the army). My mother proceeds to calls me unfeeling and uncaring since I'm not "grateful" for veterans and I'm not overly "god bless america". She says that she doesn't know if she can even live with me anymore, starts crying and says that I'm like an unemotional monster (i have clinical depression but haven't had an episode in months, plus my job is very physically demanding so I'm exhausted a lot). She asks me why I never joined the military (not bothering to ask my other sisters this question), knowing full well that I was planning to years ago. It wasn't until I heard about the rampant rape and assaults on women in the military that I decided not to join. I tell her that that was a justifiable reason as to why not to. She doesn't have anything to say about that but devolves back into how "america is the only country that blah blah" but I'm pretending not to listen at this point. I'm honestly confused and a shocked that she would call me unemotional and uncaring since she knows full well about my depression issues, but its justified b/c me no likey the cult worship of the military? I'm just upset and sad that that matters to her more than her relationship with me.
>>206130>I'm honestly confused and a shocked that she would call me unemotional and uncaring since she knows full well about my depression issues
I've learned that people like to take someones brain problems and twist them into something else to vilify them.
I have no good advice on how to handle this aside from learning to not care what they think.
what the fuck thats as shady as shade gets.
I'd say bring it up to her that you wanted to go, no drama. Just explain to her and subtilty let her know that what she did was shitty.
If my friend did this to me i'd be so pissed.
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>"I'm desperately looking for someone who works for me!"
>9 hours a day
>for 200 bucks a month
I wonder why no one wants to work for you…
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>>206258>temp to perm position in a call center
literal hell on earth. temp to perm in general sucks because agencies make you do all the donkey work when you're a temp and you keep plucking away hoping they'll take you on permanently. and then when they do they overload you with work because you already have the "experience" on how to do everything even the bullshit beyond the scope of your job, from temping. it's almost always like they give you so much more responsibilities than someone who is hired on to the position organically.
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>>206258>That doesn't sound legal even
Job will be without a contract for sure. Where I live 80% of jobs are contractless, so they can get away with it. Then they whine that "Waaaah young people are so spoiled, they don't wanna work 9 hours mon-sat for 400$ monthly at max!!" and consequently that "Waaaaaah young people are all emigrating except for the local delinquent kids with no education!!?"
Fuck them and fuck this place, I'm gonna do au pair in a country I like and that has a better economy and employment situation so that I can move there later.
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I'm stuck giving my little sister rides to her college now that I'm doing some paperwork before I can start my job. It's literally 2 hours a day, everyday, of me driving her and then back home, and then going to pick her up again. I literally want to kill myself. She's so rude, and my parents don't want to her to take the bus at all. But I had to take the bus every single day, an hour each way, when I was going to college, so what gives? She acts like a spoiled brat in the back and I'm afraid I'm going to get into an accident because she won't stop bitching and whining and screaming about irrelevant shit when I'm trying to drive.
maybe your sister is just too fucking dumb to take the bus, and instead of 'spoiling' her they think she's too stupid not to get lost/killed/raped.
alternatively, just pretend your car is messed up and then once your job kicks in 'fix' it.
An old man flashed his dick at me while I was on the bus during my first year of college, and I told them and they still made me take the bus. So I'm pretty annoyed by how they're acting like she just can't handle the long bus ride, when I managed to get a degree in a difficult major while still having a total of a 2 hour commute every day.
And my dad is very good with cars, there's no way I could pretend it's broken.
Reading 'mutual crotchfruit' had me in fits of laughter, thank you for that.
Sounds like so many people I know that are trapped in a pretty mundane lifestyle due to having children. I guess it's nice that you're including her in your chats and I would imagine she's super grateful for it… I know my friends and I couldn't pretend to give two hoots about someone's kid.
Right. I've sat down and explained in great detail every portion of my move and where I'm going and what I'm doing and I'm still met with questions that I've JUST got done answering. Or a few days later they act shocked that I'm moving even though I've been talking about this for at least a year consistently.
Now I'm moving in a few months and it's becoming really annoying really quickly that none of these people have remembered anything I've been telling them, suddenly NOW they're worried and harassing me, arguing and debating with me, about the safety of my new living situation and constantly talk down like I have no idea what I'm talking about.
Yeah, my issues tho.
Meh, I don't know anon. Depends where you live and your social group I suppose. I'm American and made it clear to everyone that I'm leaving the country for good. I left the U.S. before, and it's a falling country. Most Americans I know are really good people, and it makes me sad seeing everything falling behind/apart. To make it clear, I'm from a wealthy area and not a hick town.
It's become a country of broken people, broken dreams, etc. Most people encouraged me to leave because they also see what is happening. Many of these people are in their 60's, 70's, and 80's (I lived around a lot of friendly and awesome senior citizens) and have seen the U.S. declining. Right now I live in Europe, but I plan to move back to an East Asian country. The safety, infrastructure, continued development, and lack of crazies everywhere is really why I'm headed that direction (I know crazies exist, but not like San Francisco or New York where they are freakin everywhere…). Even South East Asia is acceptable for me personally. I'm working toward gaining permanent residency so I can bring my family over if things get too bad in the states.
I don't have any real advice on your family, but if you wish to leave, then I hope you find a way out and it's as easy and stress free journey as possible! <3
If it's any consolation, the one person who stressed to me that the U.S. is the best place ever and I shouldn't leave gave up his citizenship to become an American, his parents are miserable here, and he has security cameras in and around his home because of burglars/has multiple guns due to crime. AMERIKA!!!
Sameeee I am so dumb lol>>206364
It was an essay on why a work of Japanese literature deserved being translated. Luckily the requirement was only 1500 words, and the preface to the book was very, very helpful. I finished it in about 6 hours and still had time to do touristy things lol.
Nah, I was thinking another anglo country. I'm shit at trying to learn languages because I've honestly tried hard with French and still suck.>>206478
I live in the Southern U.S. in a very poor, red state. Obviously people here are "patriots." Thanks, anon. I've been working on getting out for about 2 years now, even though I'm not clear on which direction on the globe I should go.>>206456
I mean, it's not a situation I care about because I don't watch/support the NFL, but it really is starting to seem like no form of protest is okay. Like the government wants everyone to shut up and bow down to it and it's tricking some certain people into believing that's patriotism. This country would've never been started with that mentality.
You do you anon. If you guys are more comfortable being quiet with your affections then do it. Most likely people are tired of the super show-off PDA but are too polite to say anything. My boyfriend and I are the same as you and yours, and our friend and his gf are the same as your friend and his GF. Trust me, we and everyone else are SO over the groping and making out and "sweetie I love u so much ur my cwutie pwie bwaby kiss kiss" shit.
10/10 would rather be around a couple that make shit jokes than make out.
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>Wake up to someone's unwarranted and rude "critique" of my art
>Get a bit sad and anxious, especially because I've been feeling like a POS recently, but okay, I need to move on and not let it get to me
>Get out of computer and go greet my parents
>Casually says to mom how we'll soon need to buy more cat food
>"But it doesn't need to be exactly right now, there's still a bit left–"
>Mom all of sudden gets snarky and passive-agressive, implying that I always procrastinate
I can tell today is going to be a really nice day, eh.
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Im the anon with the childhood cat that died, just wanted to say thanks to the anons (in both vent threads) for the kind words.
I've become more proactive, goal assertive etc but at the same time my intrusive ass thoughts have reached a peak. Shaking hands and unsteadiness is a constant. Its driving me crazy but I take it one day at a time. Im not angry enough to vent, i just wanted to say thanks to the farm in general.
This is formatted more for the letter thread but I don't want to necro it.
You are so perfect and I have never felt even remotely like this about anyone ever before. You're smart, and funny, and so much like me. I've had the worst crush on you and it hasn't even been that long, but somehow it feels like its been forever.
I'm tired of unintentionally thinking about you all day and having dreams about you some nights.
I'm tired of how I act in our friend group: Forcing lots of conversations with other people to hopefully get you involved in one (when I put a lot of effort into this and fail I want to die). Pretending I care what people who aren't you say. Forcing myself to say the occasional rude remark to you like I would anyone else (when you return the favor I want to die), ignoring you here and there as if I don't care about you. Neglecting what appear to me as chances you're giving me to talk one on one with you (but I'm probably delusional). And I put in all this effort so that when you say something I can at least be around to hang on your every word, that's just as unimportant as everyone else's, but for some reason means so much to me.
I know you rejected me, and for a reason that was and still is valid. I knew going in what the answer was because of that, and I was hoping that answer would give me peace. It didn't, and because I don't know if you think I'm ugly or if you hate me or whatever, I like to lie to myself and tell me that we could be together after all. I want to cuddle with you, and go on walks with you, and just live life with you, holding hands and skipping down the street.. I'm just hoping deep down inside that if your current relationship tips that you'll magically tell me you have feelings for me, but I know it's not coming.
Just stay inside (if you can), away from the windows and keep watching the news/be updated.
Hope it goes all well anon and that it'll be over soon
I'm also a student who has fallen behind on my schooling after years. I'm 23 and I'm a sophomore (2nd year). Unfortunately, I can't any offer any advice. My situation only changed out of luck, and I'm not permanently sure if it's changed for good. Hang in there.>>206749
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Feeling totally anxious all day because it's one of the days that I realize that my diploma I got in Communication Design is fucking useless because I feel it won't help me in anyway job-wise but when think about to go into another direction I feel like I have actually no goal or idea of what the hell I want to do with myself and everything else. It's so pathetic. And to make the situation even shittier, instead of work in my field I started to work in a job that has absolutely NOTHING to do in what I studied bc you have to pay the bills and debts.
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I've been doing keto for a few months now. Decided I have been a good girl and progressing nicely so I had a couple of drinks last night. I used to down a six pack of beer every night without a problem but two vodkas and soda water did me in. Now I'm having the worst hangover I've ever had in my life. I'm an idiot.
I have the same issue, but with my current bf. Yesterday I was crying over the block button as I felt like pressing it and ending it all - I just couldn't take the loneliness in the relationship anymore.
I don't have many friend and the ones I do are ignoring me. For a long time, I'm shunned by him too. I'm excited the entire day to receive a message from him and when he does it's usually just a few stickers. I get sad he doesn't want to talk to me like he used to.
Has anybody been through something similar and solved it successfully?
I'm in two minds about pulling the plug on my new relationship. I really want it to work, and I don't know if it's just my anxiety talking but I keep seeing red flags.
>he doesn't really do anything but play games during the day, but messages me about once a day, usually in the evening
but he's been like that since the beginning and is genuinely very quiet and not very talkative
>He's not very affectionate over text, usually talks to me like he would to a buddy
but he does similar things irl and has self-admittedly only ever been in one relationship of a few months, which ended because his gf dumped him for reasons above
>he never seems very interested in doing anything but cuddling and kissing when we do see each other
but he never says anything against it either, he just kind of goes with anything I suggest and is a very passive person in general
>he forgot his mother's birthday and acted like it was no big deal
She's his only parent.
>We only see each other at the weekend because we live in different cities, and he said he wouldn't be able to see me in the next couple of weeks because of some college stuff
>Seems to know what he's doing despite having never been in a proper relationship (seems fishy, but might not be)
>Is generally very sweet when we do see each other, has brought me books and borrowed some of my stuff, calls me his gf etc
I'm not keeping my hopes up but he might well be a bit socially awkward or something, he absolutely looks the type and I don't mind that. On the other hand, we would be in an LDR for a long time and he might just be trying to pump and dump me by acting the nice guy for all I know.
I really don't know whether to call it quits now or see how it develops with the risk of getting hurt.
>get a female teammate (very rare, maybe 1 in 20 matches, and I get 4 random teammates every match)
>team kill her with AWP at beginning of round
>call her roastie
I can't play with females on my team, even well behaved ones piss me off.
It reminds me of too many negative things. Like how feminism has destroyed western civilization, destroyed the family structure and caused extreme divorce rates, caused rampant cheating, race mixing, STDs, bastard children, imported third-world immigrants, lowered wages, SJWism, degeneracy and moral decay in general.
All that on top of the fact that they won't fuck me, they'll fuck niggers and any scumbag with money, but not me because I have no money to offer. They have no sense of loyalty or pride in their own race, if their country is invaded the first thing they want to do is start fucking the invaders because they have the money/power now.
All these fucking women have 300+ friends on Steam, and they're almost always queued with a bunch of beta orbiters, stereotypical white knights, they are thirsty for the virtual pussy that they will never get.
How am I supposed to focus on my CSGO match then? That's why I just team kill them until I'm kicked.(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
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Are you proud of your post anon?
Please try. If you're in your third year, that gives you two years or so with the friends you've made in college. That's a lot of time.
Even if I pull myself together after graduating, I think I'll be a little bit ashamed of this for most of my life. Don't wind up like me. Do your best to make friends. As long as you try hard, even if you don't succeed, you can be a little bit proud of yourself.
I find so funny how stupid and useless these kind of men are. They are unable to catch up with modern times and because of that they blame their lack of adaptability on women. And it's funny too how they do it: repeating over and over what other omega men say, thinking that make them look less stupid. When is so transparent how weak they are in real life. I mean, the way they feel threatened by other men, wtf.
Let's enjoy every post these whiny dudes post. For real is a really good laugh picturing the escenario they describe. We will miss these stories when their genes are long lost.
>>206992> For real is a really good laugh picturing the escenario they describe.
Honestly I just thought of griefers like this dude up until the whining about roasties etc.
God I want to go to Arby's now.
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I'm pissed that hugh hefner is being celebrated, he literally photographed brooke shields, eva and another girl nude when they were 10-12 yrs old, and put it in playboy and he got away with it, along with people defending him because he used the "it's art therefore it doesn't fall under legal definition of child porn" which is the same reason why michael jackson got away with child porn, people need to realize not all child porn is some creepy guy taking pics of little girls in his basement, sometimes it's done buy rich successful people under the guise it's ~art~
why is hollywood crawling with pedophiles? and why do so many people just mindlessly believe they weren't pedos and all this is okay? fuck man, all pedos and their defenders need to be decapitated
The only reason you're mad at "pedophiles" is because you're jealous that men naturally like younger girls, and not old hags.
If the age of consent wasn't so high, all guys would prefer to be fucking 12-15 year old girls.
The only reason that's even degenerate is because it's pre-marital sex, a 13 year old girl can't consent any better than a 25 year old woman, that's why all throughout history women of any age were not allowed to consent to sex, it was their father who decided. Woman are too retarded to make these decisions even in adulthood, and letting them make decisions for themselves is literally what caused the fall of ancient Rome and modern America.
All throughout history grown men would marry 13 year old girls and there's absolutely nothing degenerate about that. You know what's degenerate? Some guy having to settle for you, and your rotten vagina that's been used by several other men, your horrible entitled feminist attitude, complete lack of morals, materialistic world-view centered around money, and 3+ strains of HPV.
That's degenerate, a grown man marrying a pure 12 year old virgin girl is the opposite of degenerate, although society is trying really hard to corrupt girls this young now.(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
Isn't it adorable? Lil guy who can't make any 20-something feel attracted to his sorry ass, thinks he would get a chance with a pre-teen (let's be honest, a 13 yo would feel grossed out by the mere sight of an individual like this). In none of the possible scenarios you would get the pussy. That's real life for you.
But don't worry babe, you can have all the attention you want here with us gals. Everybody knows no one outside the internet is interested in your sad life and that if you ever stop breathing no one will give a shit. Only because we feel kinda sorry for you, we grant you some attention. I can imagine is the only time of the day you ever get noticed by a girl, don't you?
I can tell that you both are very different in one way and very similar in another.
If you would dump him now he would probably think something along these lines:>why would she fake all that affection and just dump me a short while later? i better not ignore those red flags next time
Well then what in heavens should I do? I even asked my mum and she, in true lolcow fashion, told me to dump him right away.
I really like him, but not enough to twiddle my thumbs for eons until he decides to grace me with his presence.
What about in the case of 12 to 13 year old boys? Think they can give their consent too?
Anyone who goes after 12 to 13 year olds is mentally ill, period. Older people didn't marry younger people all the time. Usually if 13 year olds were to marry, they would be married off to someone slightly older or their own age. If you look at royalty, that is also the case. Louis XVI, for example, was only a year older than his wife Marie Antoinette. They were both around 15-16 at the time of their marriage.
12 to 13 year olds are not mature, and cannot hold a decent conversation with someone much older than them.
I have, he doesn't get it (or at least pretends not to)>But anon, why does our relationship need to have a title? Let's just enjoy it for what it is!>But anon, what do you mean I don't talk to you enough? I message you every day!*
*for ten minutes
Just tell her.
I used to be that kind of friend (not that extreme) and my friends told me after a while. I'm much better now and I appreciate that they told me.
>>207091>But anon, why does our relationship need to have a title? Let's just enjoy it for what it is!
Compulsive labeling, psychological need to impose expectations and experiencing frustration over lack of clear boundaries are the sort of things some people like to avoid in a relationship. >But anon, what do you mean I don't talk to you enough? I message you every day!
Talking about trivial stuff can get exhausting for someone who is not good with words, but it doesn't mean that he would think or feel any more about you if he was an extrovert poet who drowns you in beautiful poetry.
Just a passing post, contemplating suicide. It may be selfish, people care for me and w.e bullshit, but I genuinely don't want to be alive. I've been on meds for 10 years now with no improvement on how I think so kinda feel like I'm hanging by a thread. I am tired of hearing the "people care for you! Hold out!" Stuff but it doesn't faze me anymore. Same with the"so selfish!" Hell I wish when I attempted suicide it worked. Now I'm in a awkward in between. I feel like I'm in purgatory,
>tfw I'm no longer seeking help, but seeking solice until the end comes.
>tfw I just drink with pills hoping someday it'll finally get me.
>tfw it doesnt get better
Mental illness is a lovely thing, especially being fully aware of its ridiculousness, and not being able to fix it even though you want to.
>won't even remember this is the morning.
Thanks for the vent anons, I love you and hope thing improve for you all. I'll be breathing tonorrow, and even probably the next, even though I don't want to. Hopefully we can all move on.
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I feel very boring and uncool. I know it's very silly to be preoccupied with being "cool" as an adult but I can't help it. I recently fell down the rabbit hole of browsing the instagrams of former classmates from high school and middle school, and I felt so absolutely lame in comparison. I know they're only documenting the fun parts of their lives on social media, but it doesn't change the fact that they have the opportunity to do so.
I just really, really want to feel cool too. I want to wear cool clothes and go to interesting places and have fun friends. I wanna have an ~aesthetic~ and a life that reflects it. I've been very boring my whole life. I was a very good student and never got in trouble, but I didn't have the opportunity to really foster many friendships or hobbies during high school because of my rocky home life. I entered a niche STEM field in college, and in addition to struggling socially, I ended up struggling academically too.
Once I graduated, I ended up bouncing around the country for a while because of my unstable home life, so I haven't had the opportunity to make new friends or focus on starting a career. Either way, I doubt I'll be able to actually pursue what I want because it isn't particularly practical or lucrative. So here I am, directionless, jobless, a bit fat and very broke, while my peers are off constantly doing cool and interesting shit.
I occasionally think about overhauling my real life and social media image. I could find a shitty job and try to save up the money to dress cool (even though I admittedly do not have the body to wear the clothes I want to), but I would be wearing a "cool" costume at best. I still wouldn't necessarily have the money or time to live a cool or interesting lifestyle.
In the end, I know that fretting over being uncool is stupid (some-people-have-war-in-their-countries.gif) but it doesn't change the fact that its still something I pine for internally.
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I'm about to have a huge panic attack and I don't know what to do!! I have a few limited symptom panic attacks a week and I'm anxious all day every day but I haven't had a Big One since the beginning of the year. None of my friends are awake because I moved ~15 time zones ahead of them all, and my boyfriend is sleeping in the next room so I can't wake him up for help. I hope posting this helps somehow. I feel so trapped.
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I'm going to quit my job. Corporate is creating a more complicated and hostile work environment. I have PTSD due to a abusive ex so loud noises and amplified lights does happen to be a ongoing symptom. Long story short, my manager did not care about my condition and a 50 year old woman on my team spread a rumor about me when I had a panic attack. I tried to kill myself last night. I'm sad. Everyday I thought I could do better and sweep my feelings under the rug but it has gotten worst. I've been there for awhile so it's not a worry to get a similar job cause FUCK this one. I want to be happy like when I first started, not deal with this shit.
Are we dating the same guy?
>when he's not asleep, he plays games/consumes media all day (night) and chats with his online buddies >sends me messages with no substance, almost no conversation >he never seems very interested in doing anything but cuddling and kissing when we do see each other
Same.>groans when I want to do some activity other than cuddling >doesn't know some basic things about his parents, acts like I'm weird or annoying for asking
The difference is, we've been together for a longer time. He used to be milk and honey to me and I've grown to love him despite his mentioned erm, qualities that have bothered me. But now that his behaviour changed to worse towards me, all I feel is sadness. I can't even tell the red flags.
Just write it anon, maybe you'll come to self-realization.>>207271
Can you give us examples of how he was acting?
I hope you're feeling mentally better, anon. >>207278
Didn't quite understand that. You only want texts from that guy but he's not replying to you?
He sounds depressed. Has something in his life changed?
Maybe suggest taking up a new hobby that you both would be interested in? Something outdoors, or just something to get him away from the computer.
I can't find the work thread, so I'll post it here.
I had an odd experience at work today. I commonly close the door to my office because my desk faces away from the door and not being able to see behind me while I'm working sucks. I have a "please knock" sign on my door, and when someone comes by I'll just stand up and open it.
So today I was sitting at my desk half-working-half-staying-awake, and I hear someone open the door. I spin around and am greeted with a co-worker and the fire marshal. It was apparently sprinkler inspection day.
"Oh hey Anon, this is the new Fire Marshal. You don't have to shake his hand, I know your hands might be sticky from, y'know, bein' in here alone."
I immediately froze at the very implication, and stammered out a "N-no, of course not!"
The Fire Marshal, confused by this exchange, chose not to shake my hand and instead pointed his laser at the sprinkler heads, gave it the all-clear, and left. The co-worker smiled and waved as he left.
And I just felt so DIRTY afterwards. Is this what it's like? What it's like to be triggered? Why would he even come into my office and suggest that in front of a total stranger? I didn't know this guy. This was my first meeting with him, ever. I knew the last guy because I submitted paperwork for him, but I wouldn't make a joke like that to the last guy, much less this guy.
What the heck?
Am I wrong to be so freaked out right now?
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I just started college a month ago and I'm miserable. I haven't made any friends because I don't have the money to live on campus and I drive instead. My professors are the only people I really interact with outside of my family. All of my friends but one are long-distance at this point and I don't even want to be around her because she's become so delusional and aggressive because she's "transitioning" into a guy or some other insane bs. Never had any kind of interaction with guys in high school so when it comes down to it, I feel like I'm just a shitty, fat, ugly 18 year old virgin doomed to be a female incel. I find myself turning to my anime husbandos for comfort and it makes me feel so gross because I think I'm regressing mentally. Nothing remotely sexual interests me anymore, although it's not like I ever got the chance to have sex or anything.
I can barely get myself up in the morning to wash and go to school. I feel like I'm growing distant from everyone I care about and I can't stand it. My life sucks and I have no idea how to make anything better because my usual coping mechanism is avoidance. I don't go to any clubs on campus and I leave as soon as classes are over because I'm tired and hungry and cranky from never sleeping well and I always look and feel out of place on campus. I'm short and fat and greasy no matter how much I try to look better. I feel so insecure about myself and even though I know my family loves me I don't want to bother them with my problems. Everything pisses me off now. I feel like college brought on so many of these issues. What do? Am I just depressed or is it something else ;_;
I go to a small liberal arts school about 45 minutes away from my house. I have no idea if any of my professors are currently doing research, but they're all empathetic and willing to help students out. However, I did drop a class two weeks ago because the professor was an asshole. That also has been lingering in my mind.
I have a few clubs I want to join, and I think next week I'll try going to a club or two. I just hate either having to stay on campus all day or driving myself to school or back in rush hour traffic.
>want to move out but no one will fucking hire me or even interview me
>have job for a few weeks that paid me in peanuts, ended up with my bank account going to zero everytime I needed to fill up on gas and went days without eating so I drank the tap water during lunch break to stay hydrated
>won't even get a fucking interview
>"YOU'RE SO LAZY ANON"
>comes in my room randomly and starts yelling at me to get a job
>gets drunk and starts telling me I'm dumb and lazy despite me filling out 10+ applications a day
>Can't apply for food stamps, ebt, or anything else because they have me on the record as living with my parents who only allows me to eat very little until I can get a job
>apply in place I'm planning on moving to and is in the town I want to go to school in
>YOU'RE SO STUPID ANON WHY WOULD YOU APPLY THERE IT'S FAR AWAY(45 minutes by car)
>have friend who lives in said town who offers me to move in until I can get a job there and offers to help me, problem is my parents would never allow me, an 18 yr old to stay there with no adults, they have a tracker on my phone and bombard me with questions the second I do anything slightly off (ex - say i'm going to the store and stop at a gas station on the way home)
which is another reason why I NEED a job, I want to pay my own bills and take the stupid location thing off so they don't accuse me of being on drugs everytime I turn my phone off and they can't watch my every fucking step
problem. I need gas, I live in the middle of nowhere, I'd walk there if I have to just to get the fuck away from them, but they won't allow it if I can't drive to the location, a lot of places I'm applying to require in-person applications, if I try to print it at home they go through it and start calling me a liar, telling me to remove random things etc (ex, I got rewards in high school, which they don't believe because they never came to the reward ceremony so they called me a compulsive liar and told me to take it off as well as me speaking other languages I learned from reading and taking classes)
I want to print it out at the library, which is fine I don't mind, anyway, the problem is that my last employer didn't fire me but they fired me, meaning I showed up, saw my schedule and only got 15 hours, which would barely pay, started feeling myself starve and breakdown while trying to check out customers, got told to go home, showed up next day, be sat down in office, get told "this isn't mutual you don't benefit us contact us in 6 months when you feel better and we will see"
I don't even know why I haven't fucking killed myself yet, I can't get fucking anywhere thanks to my shitty parents and this economy
Holy shit. That sounds like hell, anon.
I know it's hard, but why won't you cut ties and move out with the friend? It looks like you don't have much to lose here, they are not only not supporting you, they are actively sabotaging and outright abusing you.
Don't kill yourself, anon. Just get away from this shit by any mean necessary. It's going to suck, but by the look of things, it's probably not going to suck as much as being starved and being berated by your parents daily without any reasons.
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I hate the way my body looks.
I've had really saggy breasts since I started wearing bras, and I feel like I have stretch marks everywhere (I have some really visible vertical red ones on my stomach). I don't know what to do. I need to stop being such a pussy and lose all this extra weight I have but I have such a bad feeling that even if I got down to 100 I would still fucking hate myself. Not to sound like a teenager, but I can't even stand looking in the mirror at this point.
I just started using the treadmill at my campus' rec center, so hopefully that + fasting will do something. I'm tired of looking like an ogre all the time…
my heart aches for you, anon. i'm from a similar household. i know it feels impossible to leave but trust me you can do it and you'll be SO much better off once you do. my drug addict parents kicked me out at 17 and it was difficult as fuck at first but hey not being abused everyday is a huge leap in quality of life so having to work harder is worth it imo
your friend lives in the same city you wanna go to school in and is down to help? ditch the bugged phone and get a cheap burner, the car if it's not in your name, grab your important papers and just get the fuck out. you're a legal adult now, stop asking for permission from ppl who abuse u. work in restaurants if you can't vibe with fast cash jobs so you'll make more than min wage. start as a host and beg for a promotion to server shamelessly until it happens. ppl who see that you are in a bad situation and offer help are rare, take that opportunity and run with it.
bless your hearts anons! I really appreciate it, I know my family provides me some money by babysitting, once I get paid I'll go to the town and apply to as much jobs as I can there and print out resume in library, I don't expect any 100 dollar an hour job, but just an full time job income right now is better than nothing
>ditch the bugged phone and get a cheap burner, the car if it's not in your name, grab your important papers and just get the fuck out
no idea where the papers are tbh, if I do leave chances are they'll report me for thief or something hence why I wanted to make my "running away" go more smoothly, I'll deal with the bugged phone and all until I get to move out, once I know I can be completely dependent on myself I'll cut ties with them
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What made you think that becoming fat was a good idea in the first place? Nevermind. Just keep it up and in time you'll might learn to enjoy a workout.
>>207235>it's very silly to be preoccupied with being "cool" as an adult>I could find a shitty job and try to save up the money to dress cool
It sounds silly because of your perspective. You should get a job not because you want to be "cool" but because you're an adult.
Once you're not so broke and have some structure in your life, you can start thinking about your other goals. It's not hard imo to overhaul your whole image and closet once you have money and know exactly what you want.
Thank you, anon, that might be it. I recognized the symptoms of the depression long time ago but he didn't admit it to me until recently. He refuses to talk about things troubling him, he refuses to get help from me and he refuses the help of a professional.
I feel like tooting my own horn here, but maybe it's our relationship going a bit south that has made his sad. I know that's what makes me depressed. I'm even sadder that he won't communicate things.
The other thing I'm worried about is that he has been exposed too much to the thinking of his /r9k/-tier buddies.
I tried to get him to move more and do things together with me, but he just wishes to go home. He says that's what he wants - to sit in a dark room and be on the computer all the time.
why the fuck are you making her feel bad, you awful piece of shit?>>207400
i know it's hard as fuck to start, but please do it the right way, don't fast! exerice, even pay for a trainer if you have the money. eating less and healithier is way easier than fasting and not to say much more effective.
tbh your boyfriend's behavior sounds a lot like me during the more severe depression dips. He's probably stressed out/depressed and wants constantly something distracting to take him away from that state (cuddling, overconsumption of media) because it's his coping mechanism. >>207363
I didn't make friends at college because I just couldn't connect with them outside of group projects etc. Did just fine, found friends elsewhere. You're so young you're probably still attached to the mindset that school is your whole world. And stop stressing about being a virgin, I don't think a sloppy awkward first time would change your life in any way.
/fit/ actually recommends sports? Can't say I've seen that before, it's cool though.
Sports didn't help me lose weight though. It gave me big quads, but losing weight is all about your diet and I can not out-exercise my bad diet even doing it for an hour or two 5-6 days a week.
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I will probably get made fun of for my reaction to this, but did anybody else see this thread? https://twitter.com/annetdonahue/status/916013055107928064
NYT released a story on Harvey Weinstein's countless allegations of sexual harassment over the years. I saw it on trending so I looked through it and found this tweet. I read every single reply and had to try really hard not to cry because some of them sound like experiences I've had and I know my friends have had. It just breaks my heart that almost every single woman I know has a story like this of varying severity.
Will things ever fucking change or do we just have to keep our mouths shut and deal with this? I know I'm overreacting but this just makes me so angry I feel like I need to self harm. Being a woman seems so fucking hopeless, like no matter what we do people can act like they respect us and see us as something more than just a walking fleshlight with no feelings or ambitions but they're lying. I really want to vent about this but I can't actually put my thoughts into words. There's just too much going on in my head.
The world seems like one giant shitty joke sometimes.
Today I had that Friday feeling and took my time getting ready, I actually feel like myself for once and wasn't even hating the idea of work but four men have told me to smile for no reason and another walked up and told me I looked like I had a cold and then walked away again seemingly offended when I asked why he was telling me that. None of this was mid conversation or even friends, just random guys who work in the same huge company that half walked past.
I know that I'm just extra sensitive to it because I'm hormonal right now, but this never happens so much when I don't put in the effort with makeup so it feels really obviously like some kind of negging thing even though guys always say things like "I tell everyone to smile! It's a nice thing not a sexist thing!".
And then a random guy who had been a nice adjusted human in a stream yesterday sent me an instagram message this morning and then complained that I was "hardly replying" and "replied late" so now I'm stuck trying to compose replies that are polite enough that they can't come back to haunt me, but firm enough that he knows I don't need to take that shit from a stranger.
I felt good this morning, and now I just feel like blobfish in makeup and want to be left alone by the men of this world.>>207507
Solidarity for you anon. I'm glad that I live somewhere that physical harassment is at least something we have the law on our side about but it feels like stuff never gets much better. The more noise we make about it, the more the gross "men hating women making a big deal about nothing" jokes get thrown about to silence us.
This has sparked some debate in the UK http://metro.co.uk/2017/09/28/young-people-think-sexual-harassment-is-part-of-a-night-out-finds-study-6962796/
I feel exactly the same anon every single day that I have to interact with a human.
Also, I made a cringeyish comment on a forum that's sort of work related and I feel that I made a fool of myself. It's stupid that I let it torture me like this for days. I could delete it but then it would be obvious why so I'm in a limbo… I want to delete my account but I have a lot of positive activity on it. Plus, the person that asked the question didn't pick my answer, even though I think it is also a valid option for his or her issue.
Why can't I stop thinking about this, forking why? And it had to be tied to my real name. Now everyone will know what a fool Jane Doe is now.
I keep rereading my answer and I just can't figure out what was going on in my head when I wrote what I did.
Please, someone, kill me.
I have faced similar issue with my situation. After tons of physical and mental abuse and deciding to cut off my parent I had ppl around me tell me that it was "out of love" or "how can you do that to your mother?" etc. Blood doesn't matter when you are getting eaten alive by stress and constant panic attacks due to forces outside of your control that you could actually eradicate by just removing the source (abuser).
But, don't fret. I know in this world it seems like for every 1 person who understands what it is like and what you are going through, there are 10 others telling you to change your mind about it, but you are making the best choice for yourself and tbh in life all you have is yourself.
I know what you mean, my anxiety ruined my social life and I hate to acknowledge my social anxiety because nowadays all awkward teens think they have
I barely talk, when I do I speak one word sentences, I avoid asking questions, speaking or talking when I don't need to so I don't have to get into detail, everything annoys me
I avoid going to crowded places, will show up somewhere, see if it has a lot people and leave if it does even if it took me a while to get there
when driving, I avoid driving at the same speed as cars next to me so they don't look at me through my window
at work when I was a cashier, some of the most stressful moments were thanks to people who didn't want to buy their shit and get out, I felt an odd form of secondhand embarrassment everytime someone would come up to me and ask something like "does this come in a 34C"
I avoided job interviews, canceled on my friends, etc just because I was too embarrassed to ask my parents
it's ruining my life and makes socialization so fucking stressful to the point where I feel secondhand embarrassment for people who talk, I'd kill to be one of those cute bubbly chatterboxes but why do I feel so god awful embarrassed by socialization ?
I feel the same; my life is not perfect, there are a lot of things that could go better. I barely have any friends, but even if a do something with them, like maximum once a month, i still feel like smethings missing. Even on christmas there everything was perfect i kept thinking about how i'm still depressed and still not satisfied and this keeps going on and on and is not getting any better…
I'm literally scared of every little thing,even knowing i need to do a phone call the next day leaves me unable to sleep and eat, my heart is racing all the time and i malways feel like vomiting.
So why when there's a, for me, nice moment that i'm not satisfied, it's like nothing will ever be enough…
Not to sound like I'm humblebragging
I know I'm not that attractive, but I live in this tiny yet overpopulated fucking hick town full of old fucks and trailer trash so anyone who doesn't look like they just escaped prison or is old and obese is considered beautiful
I'm SO fucking tired of getting stared it, I cannot do jack shit without getting stared down, and it's not like I have some paranoia where I think people who glance at me are always staring, my friends notice it too, I remember walking down the cities quarter and was passing a crowded outdoor cafe, EVERY.SINGLE.ONE of them were staring me the fuck down, and kept staring me down until I passed up the block, then later, my friends were talking to each other and they said "dude everyone at the restaurant was staring down at anon"
this has been happening for the longest time
once I was at the zoo in a line for a ride, just trying to have fun, a group of men kept FUCKING STARING AT ME, and I noticed, was creeped out, this woman behind me was talking to me and she said "hey those guys there keep staring at you" and I was like "yeah, it's really creepy"
once at work, I was at the cash register and this old man stands next to my register and just starts staring me down and winking at me until my manager told him to leave
I CANNOT FUCKING GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT BEING STARED AT holy shit it's driving me through the roof, I can think of more than 30 encounters in the past year or so where I got stared the fuck down, and it was obvious because I saw their eye movements and their head turning in every direction I was going
I want to live in peace I just want to be fucking invisible and go to the mall or go get coffee and pizza with friends or places I like without getting stared the fuck down
I just don't get it, I don't fucking get it
is this good or bad?
I feel so fucking creeped out
I want to enjoy life without feeling like a fucking alien my god
I literally just left a craft store without buying anything because two men kept following me around and staring at me, every aisle I went down one would show up in, the other one just stood at the end of an aisle and stared down it as I was looking at stuff to buy, this went on since I drove into the parking lot and one of the men kept staring down my car and suddenly they kept appearing everywhere for about an hour when I was shopping
maybe I'm being paranoid but what the fuck
hairstylists operate under the assumption that your hair isn't box dyed. box dye is much harder to work with, it's more time consuming and is harder on the hair to get rid of.
they aren't trying to scam you. BUT if they dont think they can work wiht it they should tell you
sorry about your hair anon. maybe this should be a lesson in box dying though? like you shouldnt have just gone and done it again? you could have waited a couple weeks and gone back (or do a different salon) to get it to where you wanted, that would have been better for your hair in the long run.
Anon if you need space to help yourself cope, take it. However if you trust her enough, you should have a chat with her first. I'm sure she would understand. It's better than her getting upset because she thinks you're avoiding her for no reason.
Could you speak to your doctor about getting some therapy? Or attending a support group?
this ended up getting resolved for me. Sober me was gonna ignore them for a day or two because they accidentally said something that triggered
my body dysmorphia, drunk me accidentally started talking to them again and then decided to make up for it by feeling really hurt about something they said a while back that I was already over, and saying lots of mean shit.
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idk why but people who obsess over babies like this creep me out, it makes me kinda sick
I know "mothers love" and all but why would someone kiss all over a babies body just to take a picture? I even saw once that someone kissed the babies buttcheek and took a picture, the same with people who write paragraphs about how cute they love a baby and how appealing they find the baby, I understand babies are cute and all but why would someone do this? who even thinks to do this? its really grossing me out
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I want to go down my weight to 60kg so badly. I'm 180cm tall and it feels like the only way to make myself look much more femine and petite. I'm not even fat, my weight is pretty normal atm, yet I am not confident with it enough to wear anything but loose sweaters and skirt combo. Lone talking about sportswear.
I keep trying to eat not too much, drink only water and sometimes tea maybe. Will keep trying I guess, I started training aikido recently so maybe this kind of activity will help out a bit..
I'm on the smaller side(162cm tall and 53kg) yet I wouldn't feel threatened by a tall girl.
In fact, it makes my kokoro go doki doki, I think they're beautiful and I hope my future girlfriend will be taller than me (i think height difference is very cute).
I've seen many tall girls that are very feminine,and even cute! I know of two 180cm girls and they're pretty (one of them is kinda chub).
Don't feel too bad and take care of yourselves, ok? It's alright to diet to lose weight but please stay healthy
163 cm here and I just wish I could be a tall elegant woman instead of looking like a stumpy kid.
I always look up to you tall girls and feel like I lost the genetic lottery.
Because I don't want to look masculine, which is easier when you're this tall. I don't want to look like a tranny when wearing dresses. >>207754
Don't worry, I won't starve myself or anything. I'm anemic, but it's not related with diet. Thank you.>>207755
I would say that 170cm-175cm is the perfect height, pretty tall but not too tall. Guess the grass is always greener on the other side.
It's hard to do a hidden camera because it's just a small terraced house and there isn't really a good place to hide it. I did buy security lights for the backyard and they were sprayed with paint within a few days. Spending money on cameras is a really good idea but I feel like the person would just cover their face and destroy whatever it is I bought. I can barely bring myself to get things fixed anymore because they just get broken again and I don't know if I can afford to buy something like a good camera system. My neighbour offered me his outdoor camera thing which was really lovely of him but it didn't pick much up and I think it was pretty expensive so I'm scared I'll invest in something that will get wrecked and not even get any footage or photos.
Sorry for the essay. Thanks for the advice <3
afaik, I'm the only one that it happens to regularly. One of my neighbours had one of the panes in her door broken but the police think that's because she came out to investigate a weird noise or something. Somebody else had their car stolen but it's assumed that's unrelated because it doesn't match up with the other things.
I asked around because I thought maybe it was a case of mistaken identity and the previous owner had made enemies but my neighbours told me the previous owners were an elderly couple and the house was sold so they could move somewhere more suited to their needs.
Everybody that lives around me knows it's happening and they're all being really good about it and offering help wherever they can, but most of them have jobs and busy lives so there are times when it's practically dead and there's nobody around to see. If anything happens during working hours or in the middle of the night, there's pretty much nothing for me to tell the police. They've noticed a few things, like somebody lurking with a hood up or groups of teens, but the police can't pinpoint the culprit that way.
Honestly even I've never been able to find anything out and I've stayed awake a few nights just waiting for something to happen. The incidents are never focused on one thing and it's hard to keep track of the whole house and move fast enough to see who is responsible.
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>>207773>The incidents are never focused on one thing and it's hard to keep track of the whole house and move fast enough to see who is responsible.
Motion sensors, shotgun with rubber slugs. Or regular slugs, I won't judge.
>>207824>I got a call from a place I applied to and they hung up after asking me where I live and I told them
I know you want a job anon, but that company indeed is very unprofessional and I think it's for the better that you don't work for them.
And it isn't about your voice at all.
i want you on my defence squad>>207773
is anything unusual happening to you outside of the house? do you ever feel anyone's following you around when you go to/from work, shopping etc? any suspicious cars parked around the neighborhood and you don't think they belong to anyone local?
it's weird to target a single house like this if the last owners were unremarkable, i kinda wonder if you have some sort of a violent stalker.
>my neighbours told me the previous owners were an elderly couple and the house was sold so they could move somewhere more suited to their needs.
do you know if they had kids?
>>207845>i want you on my defence squad
I always wanted to weaponize someones yard.
>it's weird to target a single house like this if the last owners were unremarkable
Honestly the more I think about it the more I think it's just because they're new, and are less familiar with the faces of the neighborhood. I really want to double down on the whole camera angle, because even if the recording isn't perfect you could show it to some neighbors who could help narrow down the list.
why do I get so annoyed with everything? I feel embarrassed and annoyed when people talk to me or about me, like really bad, physical pain and I start having these panic attacks that end up with me hyperventilating for hours, punching walls, digging into my skin, scratching my face, pulling out my hair, etc
I kept getting anxiety when my mom wanted to go on the computer because I was showing her some uni stuff and she kept trying to go through files and stuff, I flipped out, hyperventilated for hours, pulled out my hair, punched walls, locked myself in a room, screamed for hours, etc
this isn't the first time it happened over random stuff, my mom was talking to my grandpa about my graduation and I had a similar breakdown similar to the one mentioned earlier, I just don't know what to do anymore, I had a job for like 3 weeks when I got fired because I cried because I could barely afford to fucking eat with the hours they gave me
why do I react this way anons? I try to control it but I can't
I broke my mirror before because I was about to got to work, I feel physically sick and in pain when I know people talk about me
I feel physically in pain and feel this awful awful feeling in my stomach when I see even a normal picture of myself
I feel embarrassment when people talk to me, not embarrassed for me I feel embarrassed for them they didn't want to be quiet and go about their day, I feel a sense of embarrassment everytime I apply to a job I feel physical pains at job interviews I feel physical pain when I see people talk about work, owning a business etc, I don't understand why do I get secondhand embarassment at people who do normal things to make a living? I've been poor my entire life so it's not like a sense of entitlement or anything whats wrong with me
whats wrong with me anons? I don't want to be anon rando claiming to have anxiety
What a fucking little bitch he is. Maybe you should put up some boundaries and not act sorry when he throws a tantrum.
I don't like advocating ultimatums but it's clear he doesn't respect what you try to do for him and a little fear would maybe help him realize how he would miss you if you weren't there.
Have you tried talking to her about how her behaviour is different in general? This is pretty scary anon but I think it's good for you to start documenting this stuff in a diary. Even just a date and a weird thing she does.
If it is some kind of early onset then it will be useful for doctors to see. Try to phone her doctor and voice your concerns if it gets worse, they can sometimes call her in under the guise of a routine check up>>207871
She doesn't let you visit even when you ask? wtf sorry anon>>207873
Try regular masturbation in the bath with a glass of wine but like with no end goal, just to feel around and get familiar with yourself
I can't put anything on hold without putting financial strain on my boyfriend. We rent an apartment together and pay our bills together.
My boyfriend and I have weekends off, so we're flying down to see my dad soon (my dad hasn't officially met him), and then I'm taking all 5 PTO days to spend the week with him and my family alone before he gets too sick.
I will not be attending a funeral. I won't have the PTO to and it's not how I want my last memory of my dad to be. I will not be able to physically or emotionally cope with it.
Holy shit anon, do not allow him to treat you that way. He's acting like a spoiled brat because he can and you're enabling him. >someone brings him food basically to his feet>throws away perfectly fine food >shows he was capable of getting it on his own
My parents would have whooped me if they heard I was acting like that as an adult.
Listen to what this person said >>207886>>207880
My mother has skin cancer as well. She was in a very bad state until she got some dna-based medications. Is there a chance for him to get on that therapy?
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>on vacation this week for wedding-related purposes
>really socially exhausted
>friend calls me yesterday begging to stay at my place until november
>her abusive ex bf she's living with is mentally fucked and is threatening suicide and lawsuits and demanding she leaves
>this has been drama ongoing for the past year
>told her I couldn't make a decision right away, she then said she had two weeks before he threatened to start smashing her stuff
>today she got kicked out and put me in a cornered position by asking again to move in here immediately
>no other family or friends can help her
>I live in a one bedroom apartment with my bf
>told her it's fine to stay for a week and a half
On what I thought was going to be a relaxing day off, I had to drive her all over the place because she doesn't have a car. It involved making trips between people for certain keys to things, almost getting pressured into driving a Jeep of someone I didn't even know during rush hour traffic, and going to her storage unit. One time I had to turn around and get her after she asked to be dropped off somewhere.
She was really apologetic but I was still kind of annoyed. I want to be a helpful friend, but at the same time I'm a person that needs a lot of alone time in order to socially recharge.
I just spent the whole weekend with her for the wedding stuff, but now her asking to be here until november feels stifling. I just wanted to get high and watch cartoons on my days off, now it's awkward because now there's a person with different tastes than me occupying the living room/kitchen area. I have to go buy a clothing rack because there's no place to hang her clothes even.
I'm also terrified of having friends as roommates because I know things can sour in living situations. She claims she has a place to go by november, and I hope that doesn't change.
I don't mean to sound overreactive but it really is asking a lot.
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I would suggest you set up some hard deadlines and a cohesive plan with her if you decide to let her stay. I've seen people in your position, and their friend just sort of kludges shit together and acts surprised it fell apart and they just stick around long past the original due date. It's probably tempting to budge at times since shes your friend but a consistent front will prevent them from taking advantage of you, even if they're not doing it intentionally.
This this this
If you can use something to back up the reason for a deadline, like parents visiting at that time or something, then it will help you both stick to it>>208009
Also why are you buying her a clothing rack? Making her comfortable is sweet but that's just letting her move in.
>>208038>I'm fed up of reminding him that we're so different in this one tiny way that shouldn't matter
I don't know what universe you're in anon, but this is not a tiny thing and this matters a lot. There are a lot of guys out there who if you were trying to talk every few months about making it an open relationship they'd be really hurt and drop you, maybe most of them.
>I want to explore more sexual experiences whilst I'm still a young adult>I'm worried that one day I'll look back and regret not having a crazy youth.
Why? Because crazy stories your girlfriends tell you? Or what you think you're supposed to have done? If you think you might be gay, that's one thing to sit down and think about. If you want to bang a lot of people for the heck of it, do him a favor and leave him. If you really feel like this:
>I couldn't imagine a better partner. I can't imagine not wanting him in my life.
then I don't think you're missing out on anything.
Protips for someone who's done that before.
Withdraw a good amount of cash out of your bank account. Not all of it, ideally 75-100 USD. Go to a gas station or convenience store and have it broken into a few different sized bills. Keep 20 bucks, or 4 5 dollar bills in an easily accessible place. Keep the rest in a wallet in your back pocket or somewhere not obvious.
If you're running -from- someone, like a bad living situation. If you've got a backpack and a laptop, take those along, as well as your phone, travel toiletries, some underwear and at least one change of clothes. Immediately start looking for homeless shelters in your area. This'll be pretty easy if you're a woman. Most major cities have a runaway shelter or two for women escaping abusive situations. The runaway shelters are often in anonymous areas and will taxi you in. Others will require you to make your way there. The worst ones are first to come first serve and overnight only.
Net cafes, Mcdonalds and other eateries with free wifi are your friends. Buy something cheap and camp out until you can find somewhere more permanent. Spend as little as you can and try not to sleep in weird places.
Alternatively, if you're having an anxiety attack and you're filled with the urgent need to run away from home from some perceived danger, don't. Call the ambulance, you might need to spend a few days in the psych ward. I don't mean that in an insulting way, btw. You might genuinely need a brain reset at the hospital.