File: 1706217819071.jpg (49.08 KB, 700x463, angry-cat-photography-02-5874a…)
No. 1867763
Vent it all away.
Previous thread
>>>/ot/1857107 No. 1867793
File: 1706220190306.jpg (642.19 KB, 1075x1326, 1000012271.jpg)
>tfw chub rub finally ate thru my favorite pair of leggings while jogging at the gym and now my thigh hurts
>tfw gaining water weight from lifting and know it will eventually go down after a month but it still hurts my feelings to feel so fat and bloated when I know I am doing the right things
>tfw got super drunk on a Monday night with friends and almost made out with my own employee bc she confessed she was sexually attracted to me but I'm a straight who's just not doing ok rn
>tfw I finally told my narcissist mother of how infantilized and alienated from the rest of our family bc of how they treat me and how that makes me feel suicidal so all she replied with is that I am "unusual" and apparently it's hard to relate to me
>tfw several men constantly blowing up my inbox but none of them ever offer to buy me shit even tho they have asked me for my cashapp and wishlist
No. 1867828
File: 1706224084500.jpeg (54.5 KB, 623x680, IMG_5130.jpeg)
i feel like the world is more racist and its pissing me the fuck off seeing people i knew as normal suddenly start spouting le totally ayronixx anti black jokes which then becomes serious remarks everywhere i go online or in my own house i can't fucking escape it i cannot believe how retarded the world is getting. of course more sexist ( and homophobic too ) but in my thirdie country you'd kind of expect it, it was just getting better and now as a result of the state of the internet and the surge of users due to the pandemic now everyone's acting like 2015 edgetards in real life i can't fucking take it. you will never ever ever be american their politics don't and have never applied to us holy shit make it stop. everyone is going extremist or """ironically"""" non stop roleplaying as such. these people are not teenagers btw they have careers. it's bleak how they didn't age out of this immaturity and we just have to suffer the consequences of this. i'm not even black i'm asian but i know the way i'm dehumanized isn't even close. i'm seriously sick to death of this shit when will it end. i wish everyone would just realize it's neither impressive shocking or funny. i've always hated misanthropes but i'm starting to side with them these days. i'm so damn enraged. i feel sickened enough when adults act like teenagers and now most of the people i know are reliving the most despicable part of adolescence. i hate hate hate these stunted braindead assholes i just want to kill myself out of anger. it's even worse because it's like they purposely unlearn and undo all the development for the sake of being edgy and "distinguished" or something. how many years until we know a few moments of peace again please. i'm still holding out the hope that this won't last long but i don't know…
No. 1867886
>>1867877removing tonsils should help.
Have you seen a dentist recently? Sometimes decay underneath an existing filling can cause odor.
No. 1867894
>>1867886My teeth are all great, no infections or cavities. I go to the dentist regularly. I really hope getting my tonsils removed fixes it but I won’t be surprised if it doesn’t work.
>>1867890I drink pretty much nothing but water all day tbh and a ton of it too. I’ve tried elimination diets and all sorts but nothing really works. I noticed that coffee does make my breath worse but I barely drink it anyway.
No. 1867900
>>1867897I don’t think so, I don’t really have any problem with that stuff.
>>1867899Nope, I don’t have any symptoms. I thought it’s possible I might have a microbiome imbalance causing the smell so I try to consume probiotics but it doesn’t make any difference tbh. Oh well.
No. 1867912
File: 1706234057326.png (21.52 KB, 775x136, green tea.png)
>>1867877do you scrape your tongue too? Or have you tried green tea?
No. 1867925
>>1867877Are you getting enough zinc in your diet? Have you tried liquid chlorophyll?
I’m so sorry anon. Don’t give up on life just yet. I know it feels horrible but if someone cute and nice can love me even though my body is all fucked up, someone will love you too, even if you are a bit stinky sometimes.
No. 1867936
File: 1706236539557.jpg (26.22 KB, 564x564, 0a721f60b2f74ac225867159c7e289…)
I hate men but I especially hate old men. I got dumped by someone I was very much in love with a couple of weeks ago and I've been hitting the gym just to get the frustration out and I've been walking around with a resting bitch face and teary eyes 24/7. I'm minding my own business and suddenly this older dude (in his late 40's I assume) just HAD to let me know that I should cheer up and that he's sure that a smile looks so much better on my face. It feels so patronizing. I'm not a child. WHY are moids always like this. I DID NOT FUCKING ASK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No. 1867955
File: 1706237802137.jpeg (66.42 KB, 1024x1006, IMG_3288.jpeg)
I wish I didn’t have social anxiety and could function like a human. Genuinely I wish I were dead sometimes because it makes life unbearable. The idea of having to go through several job interviews is so depressing
No. 1867966
>>1867894If your tonsil stones are bad enough to get your tonsils out, I'm pretty sure you'll find this is going to solve the problem. I have holey tonsils and struggled for awhile with stones. I'm actually not really sure what changed but I don't get them much at all anymore and my breath issues resolved because I don't get stones anymore.
I will still get my tonsils removed as soon as I can. Not a good time for me rn though.
No. 1867996
>>1867969My hs sweetheart and ex of 9 yeqrs left me (23) after saying he saw no future together and wants to see different people so don't be
nonnie. Men are nothing but pawns to play with when bored.
No. 1868029
File: 1706246179449.jpeg (116.32 KB, 2048x1152, IMG_3876.jpeg)
>>1868026The video comp an anon posted of troons jerking off in women’s bathroom and some with women present in the bg genuinely horrified me .
No. 1868041
File: 1706248307451.jpg (46.73 KB, 212x275, 1636853864415.jpg)
>>1868026youre just like me
nonnie, except, for me, it's with the ftm thread instead. i literally had a month long emotional breakdown after an anon posted a redditer's nullification post op pic, and the redditors' shit reasons for getting it. still cry just thinking about it, genuinely dont believe that even the most self-hating of males could hate themselves the way a self-hating woman can, my godddd
No. 1868056
File: 1706251794815.jpeg (106.97 KB, 623x509, IMG_7661.jpeg)
I’ve lost 30 pounds so far and recently started lifting but holy fuck does it make me so hungry. How the fuck am I supposed to stay in a calorie deficit if lifting makes me hungry as fuck. It’s annoying
No. 1868070
>>1865254I’m the anon you replied to in the previous thread. Men treat me that way too. Both before at my obese weight and again when I gained the weight back and become obese again. For example I’ll be shopping for groceries and they’ll intentionally stand slightly in my way in the aisle, when it’s empty, just so I have to look up at them as I walk by and they can give me a nasty look. It’s very obviously intentional and meant to intimidate me for being a woman who dares to exist in an unattractive way around them. It really pisses me off. I don’t exist to be an object for their filthy desires. On the other hand guys are weirdly nice when I’m thin. Overly helpful and polite, trying to catch my eye or annoy me so I look at them. I’m a lesbian so all this forced male attention either way drives me insane. If anything them annoying me so I pay attention to them is worse tbh. It’s still worth losing the weight for yourself and your health. Even if you think your health is fine now as you get older it really starts to get bad quickly. Another thing I’ve noticed is that the fitter you are the more intimidated by you others are and the more physical space they’ll give you in public. So I suggest losing weight and then getting noticeably fit. Most guys will be too intimidated to start a conversation with you and everyone treats you with more respect. Either way prepare yourself mentally for the drastic changes in other peoples behaviour since the way men and women treat you will be very different than it was at a higher weight. Don’t give up. Weight loss first of all is for you, not other people.
Another thing is I had loose skin too, it was a embarrassing at the time, but it wasn’t very noticeable after while. Some of it went away after a year of maintaining the weight loss weight, more of it goes away as you gain muscles too. But I was never super fit. All of that is from observation of fit people I knew who lost weight too. I regret not getting fit when I was thin. Now I’m getting fitter my body composition has changed a lot and even though I haven’t technically lost a lot of weight on the scale yet my clothes have started falling off me from how much body fat I’ve lost.
Sorry for the long blog post and good luck with your WLS Nona.
No. 1868128
>>1868107After listening to "Keep your rifel by your side" from the farcry 2 soundtrack I've realised I'm a good hymn away from joining a cult lmao. Great song
>>1868121I'm really sorry to hear that nonna. I'm sorry your sister is such a cunt. You are vulnerable and she's taken the opportunity to kick you down further. I hope you are able to find people in the future that care about you.
No. 1868131
>>1868121I am so sorry,
nonny, it was sick of her to say that. Hope you and your kitty will be surrounded by nice people one day. Don't give up on yourself.
No. 1868205
>>1868186Isn't veet only supposed to be used on your legs and maybe bikini area?? Kek no wonder you're in pain if you used it all over down there
>I'm going natural from now onAs one should.
No. 1868229
File: 1706278672650.gif (1.55 MB, 251x202, gooseworx totally not a fetish…)
>>1868226amazing digital circus disgusts me, its so obviously a fetish show
No. 1868233
File: 1706279400164.jpeg (32.87 KB, 650x366, IMG_0418.jpeg)
I need to call the help desk for my work to reset my password but I cannot understand any of the representatives over the phone! I don’t know what to do; I already hate talking on the phone cause of hearing problems but now I gotta listen to some asshole in India act like I’m the fucking idiot because I can’t follow a fucking word anyone is saying through thick accents and poor audio quality. I don’t want to get my manager involved because I don’t want her to think I’m being an asshole for no reason but I really can’t move forward with my work until this gets fixed. Can I get someone who speaks clear, fluent English please?
No. 1868265
File: 1706282456234.jpeg (146.66 KB, 1057x1045, 7DC03D99-74A8-40CE-A5E6-B8A7FC…)
I was suuuuch an ugly baby, don’t get me wrong, I’m still very ugly, but it’s so jarring when a BABY is ugly. My parents keep sending me old photos from when I was 0-2 and it’s so sad watching them coo over a baby that looks like a cross between an inbred bulldog and Stephen king. It’s honestly hard for me not to laugh but then my mom gets mad at me for insulting her baby even though it’s me, kek. What do I fuckin doooo we have a Christmas ornament (picrel) with a giant photo of my baby face on it and it is the worst, it’s so depressing to be trying to enjoy Christmas and that thang is staring at you from the branches of the tree. I should have been aborted or thrown into the wilderness at birth like in ancient times
No. 1868273
>>1868265All babies are ugly.
Don't @ me you know it in your heart to be true.
No. 1868277
File: 1706283653461.jpg (386.08 KB, 1080x1440, 981946_v9_bb.jpg)
Warning really stupid rant ahead
I had a dream last night where I was at a taco truck and Zazie Beetz was behind the counter. I tried to order a taco and she kept laughing at me saying I was pronouncing it wrong. I kept trying to say taco right and everyone on the street started laughing at me. Now all day I feel like I'm in the manual breathing meme but for speech. Everything sounds off. Wtf brain? Why would you do this to us? I've been eating vegetables and all that good stuff so you work right and this is how you repay me? I'm huffing paint if this happens again tonight.
No. 1868283
>>1867969kek me too, i just go look at the relationship thread on /g/ or go on
2X and suddenly i'm fine with my moidless lifestyle
No. 1868296
>>1868292I feel you, nona. The notion of inclusivity is not justifiable at all if women are uncomfortable. Men must be catered to, and if you say otherwise then you're a bigoted
TERF cis scum or whatever word salad they've created. It's not fair, but we can still do our part and gatekeep. Gatekeep and ignore the men that are trying to latch on.
No. 1868300
I've never really known what my sexuality was. I'm in my mid 20s now, but dated a man for 5 years and I identified as bisexual then because I liked the idea of being with a woman even though I never had before. But I was in a relationship and I loved him a lot so I wasn't going to cheat or leave to find out.
That relationship ended poorly, he end up cheating, and then trying to troon out and force me to stay. There was a moment where he was like "If you're really bisexual you would still love me even if I end up finding out I am a happy". I've obviously figured out now that I just don't like men larping as women and it's totally unrelated, but it just added to my confusion at the time.
Fast forward a bit later, I'm single and still hurt from that relationship so I don't want to date or be involved with anyone. I had told myself I was going to be single for awhile, learn to be happy on my own, and then when I was ready really try to figure out what I wanted in life. That didn't work out because I ended up by chance accidentally meeting a man that was perfect for me in every way, he quite literally checked all of my boxes and I gave up how badly I just wanted to be single for awhile to keep him around. Now here we are 3+ years later and I'm still just as in love with him, it's the best relationship I've ever had, he will be the man I marry.
In this time period I've tried to assess my attraction to women and there aren't really any women I see myself attracted to. So I had just kind of decided okay I'm not actually bisexual, I guess I am a straight woman. I've felt like I could definitely be in a relationship with a woman romantically but there isn't any sexual attraction there for me. Until Renee Rapp starts going viral everywhere and I'm constantly seeing her videos on my feed and I develop the biggest crush on another woman I've ever had. I think she is SO attractive, I'm obsessed with her voice, I never get celebrity crushes and I have 0 attraction to anyone outside of my relationship but she's been the one exception.
I know it doesn't matter ultimately, I am a woman in a relationship with a man, but I guess I'm just kind of embarrassed that at my age I can't even tell if I like women or not.
No. 1868307
>>1868302Shayna enables pedos and is a bad person, I don't support any sex work, but Venus for sure has a myriad of different mental issues due to the abuse she suffered and has continued to be taken advantage of. I don't read her threads because I feel so bad for her.
And I'm not even going to go into the PT stuff, she needs serious help she's not getting and it's sad that anyone sees her life as drama.
No. 1868311
>>1868300Your story is just like mine. I ID’d as bisexual in high school, I don’t even really remember why, but after that I decided I was really just straight, and I believed that for many years. Then out of nowhere I saw a female celebrity that I became instantly and passionately infatuated with and thought about nothing but fantasies of her for an entire year. To this day she’s still the sexiest person I’ve ever seen in my life and I don’t think anyone will ever surpass her in my mind.
So I think “exceptions” are real.
No. 1868312
>>1868307I'm just half neutral regarding SW. I understand rising moral issues around the topic of SW since it can be exploitative but it's hard to overgeneralize something that manifests itself in so many forms. Also, I don't think it's fair to try to gain moral superiority over women that do it without hurting people. Even with Shayna, she doesn't have children. She's not harming anyone even if she's doing DDLG. Women on lolcow aren't laughing at her because they are concerned she's doing DDLG. They are laughing at her because she's fat and ugly or she's failing at her job. Most of the women posting on there seem like sex workers or ex sex workers.
Also, I don't think she's causing much harm. She doesn't have children. She's not pimping out girls.
(continue this in 'opinions about cows') No. 1868351
>>1868296Bless you,
nonnie. Keep on gatekeeping. We are proud women and men will never replace our spaces if we keep them out.
No. 1868404
File: 1706296939742.jpeg (796.02 KB, 1284x949, IMG_1568.jpeg)
how it feels after hitting my car because of impromptu snow storm to work
No. 1868491
>>1868294I feel you,
nonnie. I feel like I’m watching the world from behind a glass wall because no matter how old I get, it’s wired into my brain that I’m worthless, deserve abuse, my physical or emotional well-being doesn’t matter, am a fundamentally evil person, and that I’ll never be loved. Thanks mum. Thanks dad. You useless
abusive alkie paedo pricks.
Now I’m of an age where my family are telling me I need to make a decision about having kids - I made it a long time ago. I’m not bringing anyone else in this world to suffer. I think it’s so selfish to have children in general, but especially so if you’re an unstable piece of shit. I would quite happily see the human race die out with this generation.
No. 1868518
File: 1706305023508.jpeg (80.9 KB, 634x783, IMG_5624.jpeg)
>>1868382I wish I was like you anon, I can’t make an expressive face to save my life.
No. 1868603
File: 1706310499292.jpg (13.18 KB, 258x225, 1522436152580.jpg)
wow wouldn't it be so funny if I just texted her back instead of spending the whole day feeling so anxioius I could scream
No. 1868643
File: 1706313072822.jpg (238.81 KB, 901x1579, Screenshot_20240126_184225_Ins…)
Imagine making a big deal about a popcorn bucket for Dune. Men cannot exist without making everything about sex. I didn't even think of this shit when I first saw the bucket, but now every coomer on social media keeps talking about it in a sexual way. I hate moids so much
No. 1868650
File: 1706313475912.jpg (143.1 KB, 1920x800, Fight.Club.10th.Anniversary.Ed…)
1. i am sick of living at home. i feel so envious of past generations that they could support entire families on minimum wage. i HOPE one of the two companies i interviewed for this week decides to give me a goddamn chance.
2. my head shape looks very similar to his and i'm still processing that
No. 1868714
File: 1706317764222.jpg (37.72 KB, 710x452, 1000002380.jpg)
I still think of this sometimes. They started cutting her clothes off, mutilating her face and body. I gauruntee if a man were the one who did this, nobody would have mutilated him. Still disgusted by how they call it "human nature" toward violence and not exactly what it really is.
No. 1868760
>>1868348Here's the post:
>>>/snow/1957749Genuinely makes me so goddamn angry that these mutants get away with it. I don't understand anyone wanting to share a bathroom with men.
No. 1868763
File: 1706320805428.jpg (42.81 KB, 720x763, 20240116_202329.jpg)
>proclamation in GIOYC thread calling their cat unlovable and wishing it would die
Do we have a future serialkiller on our hands or is it maleposting? Some people are so shamelessly creepy and weird here, hate the vibe lately.
No. 1868765
>>1868127Would she be able to go to therapy?
>>1868226Send her the mtf thread to help peak her.Or ask her to go read articles on reduxx.
>>1868292It's crazy that even in health care, women can't win. Changing women to people with periods or people who have breast cancer, pregnant people.
No. 1868772
>>1868592Being a part of society is boring, do what makes you feel better
nonny.
No. 1868937
>>1868927Agreed.
>>1868928It means he's trying to have sex with you while you're at your mire vulnerable.
No. 1868941
File: 1706336208198.jpg (185.87 KB, 720x865, Tumblr_l_497401947794315.jpg)
I improved my life a lot. I used to be extremely lonely, nihilistic, porn rotted, suicidal, etc. and nowadays I'm usually content and I have a community that I love. But sometimes I still have this sense of like… Not to get all cheesy and metaphorical but like if you washed a sheet that was coated in grime and stuff, and now it's clean and nice smelling, but it's still kinda off-white and stained in some parts. I never feel as bad as I used to, but I dunno, sometimes the past haunts me pretty deeply. Does the feeling of darkness ever go away?
I guess writing it out it sounds more like a win than a loss. Because it is, and if you're in the position I used to be in then I hope you can have some hope. I'm just feeling damaged and angsty tonight. I've seen so much messed up stuff and the memories still come up, and I'm normie-passing but sometimes I feel like I'm larping. Not like it's hard to be social and I'm straining and masking, but just like maybe it's not me. It's not who I used to be, but is it me now? I do a great job and others enjoy conversing with me, but is it weird that I'm internally patting myself on the back for not behaving totally inept (like I used to)?
And I can't tell anyone about my past, because my new friends are wonderful and beautiful but mentioning even a fraction of that stuff shocks people and they don't know how to reply. I look very immature and am a cheery person so I dunno how people will take it.
It feels so odd. I no longer fit in with weird autistic outcast spaces but I don't know if I'm really normal either. Does it even make sense to become normal after being utterly abnormal for most of your life
No. 1868954
>>1868941You're not weird and I understand completely how you feel
nonny. I'm happy life is now more pleasant for you, please keep it up! You aren't broken, you deserve the best. Sending you hugs wherever you are
No. 1868976
>>1868941You're not broken nonna, you're changed. Hardships change us, toughen us up so we can adapt and continue on with our lives, people who can't change and adapt are more prone to not survive the next hardships. Sure, it sucks we have to go through challenges, small and/or big, at all in life, but that's inevitable because of how human nature and the world is.
So cheer up, you get to continue with life, and if something comes your way again to try to tear you down, you can go "Pshaw! Been there, done that. Next!"
No. 1869001
>>1868997anyway that's probably why people get psychologists
but isn't it sad to have to pay someone to get your thoughts out?
I mean, I guess it's a necessity and people have better things to do than to listen to each other, but it's pretty sad
No. 1869011
I hate stupid ass videos like this that bitch about white women and encourage all their commenters to as well
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/6t-0HCrWzsE?cbrd=1I’m tired of white women being used as punching bags by scrotes who hate women but are too scared to be seen as racist
Why do these little faggot scrotey white moids think it’s fine to make fun and stereotypes of every single group but get butthurt and cry when you make fun of them back?
(learn2embed) No. 1869016
>>1869015she's talking about the pic. LMFAO.
>How WHAT gets bad? I might be unable to communicate with my expression but I can at least string a coherent sentence together unlike you.I just pictured the guy in the pic saying exactly that and it's too funny
No. 1869018
>>1869006What a fucking degenerate. You deserve better. Someone like this gets off on humiliation so I’d be careful sending him
anything. What are revenge porn laws like in your countries?
No. 1869028
>>1869024yes maybe I'm too dumb
I'm really trying to stand for myself here but the problem is I live with my parents who 1. are super strict 2. live very far from the city ; so it's really not easy for me to meet new people, I get desperate and I end up "back with him"
but I do feel like I'm so fed up with his behaviour now that this could be the moment I finally truly walk out ; I blocked him back and I'm trying not to think about it too much
No. 1869029
>>1869015Girl I was talking about that man. Don't do me dirty when you made the artistic decision to attach him to your statement oml
>>1869016Thank you. Damn.
No. 1869033
>>1869024I wasn’t talking to you. Shut the fuck up and kill yourself.
>>1869028You’re not dumb. Don’t pay attention to the attention seeking emotionally barren autist. She should of never been born and is the reason eugenics should be legal.
(alogging) No. 1869035
>>1869033Are these the kind of stupid relationships you get yourself in so you’re
triggered when someone points out stupid?
No. 1869045
>>1869030I'm actually in school, I just have 2 and a half years to go until I actually graduate and land a job to move out
I just need to have more patience and resolve
(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE) No. 1869051
File: 1706347586338.jpg (79.17 KB, 627x466, rain.jpg)
i've become so socially retarded that even interaction on a multiplayer game scares me or makes me feel nervous nonnas. hell, i was playing roblox and some randoms started following my character around trying to talk to me through the vc, randoms potentially younger than me and i just closed the game out of fear. why am i like this. no amount of irl or online interaction is scaring the anxiety out of my system
No. 1869054
File: 1706347957846.jpg (124.43 KB, 900x1200, 1000002337.jpg)
Incels online love talking about female meltdowns or anger problems when they're the species that rape, kill, throw acid on people, etc. Look within.
No. 1869065
>>1869048He kept saying before blocking me that if I was actually there physically he'd hit me
I really need to start believing people when they tell me upfront they don't mean good to me
It's just… I really do not have anybody else
I know.. I just need to get it together and accept to be alone for now
No. 1869070
>>1869069that's probably the truth
I think my ego prevented me from seeing that : he doesn't actually want to be with me, he doesn't like me, he doesn't find me fun or interesting to talk to or that attractive ; but since he has no better option he sticks with me, and ends up resenting me for being the symbol of his incapability of getting someone better
thanks for the insight nonna
No. 1869081
>>1869076On one hand, he's trying to compensate the 5 years he lived secluded due to NEETdom by trying to make me his anime-looking sex slave
On the other hand, I'm trying to compensate my incapability to make a close friend in real life by trauma dumping on him constantly
I guess we're both
toxic and we really shouldn't be together
I just really really hope I don't fall back, this has been going on for 3 years
I know deep down I'll always crave him until I do move out from my parent's and am able to live my life fully
I just hope I have the patience
Anyways, thanks again for the help.. I might spam the thread a bit to vent things out
No. 1869093
>>1869081Trauma dumping shouldn’t be placed on the same level as someone trying to manipulate you and get in your pants lol. XX is doomed to forever be handmaidens if women keep thinking they’re
toxic for speaking about their traumas compared to a moid who would chain you up in his basement if he had the chance
No. 1869094
File: 1706352314906.jpg (133.75 KB, 1122x982, 1000008672.jpg)
Ended up blocking an "acquaintance"-turned-personal-cow without saying anything since she's such a fucking drama whore. Finally sent me some disingenuous shit after not replying was apparently not a good enough hint. I'm not above drama for drama's sake if it's funny, but not when it's turned into her constant panicking and digging for dirt on people out of fear she'll get caught talking loads of shit. Went back over a few old conversations and shit she's said in person and I'm sick of getting cold messaged info mining bullshit, even after I said cut it out. Quit trying to get people fired or "canceled" because of jealousy, holy shit. This isn't Twitter. Wish I could say it in a way that would make her actually care, but her "jokes" aren't funny anymore, they're just flat out mean. Venting to her was such a fucking mistake since now I'm curious what bullshit she actively spreads, knowing what she's said about other people, and how obviously desperate she's been to cover it up. Whatever, I'm done hearing it. I'll probably tell the people who matter that she's an asshole though, since her shitty insults haven't stopped for a whole fucking year.
No. 1869129
>>1868979I lost 100lbs and became objectively attractive, and for a while it felt freeing to live without shame, but after that feeling wore off I was still left with all the sadness and loneliness I had before. Fat or thin, you’re stuck with yourself unless you challenge your troubles.
I know it sounds so cheesy but the advice “fake it til you make it” works. Pretend to be the most positive, popular, beautiful person on the planet and people will be drawn to you. Work on your looks if it’s important to you, but it’s not as important to others as you think (unless you count moids as people and I don’t)
No. 1869222
File: 1706367326206.png (158.39 KB, 413x420, dcpsjkv-7ceeda17-eea3-48a4-8ae…)
>>1869161Write him if he doesn't come over in under 30 minutes you're going to search for dick somewhere else.
No. 1869269
File: 1706372131937.jpeg (79.06 KB, 607x624, 1706050001938.jpeg)
I'm so scared of becoming old, I already feel so depressed as a young person who technically could do anything, so I have no idea how I'm supposed to cope once I'm old. I know that I will be so full of regret and feel even more hopeless than I'm feeling now, how am I supposed to keep living on?
Saw pic in another thread and once again feel so torn between not really wanting kids and thinking I need them to not become that lonely. In my family (extended too) all parents and kids always have good relationships, so having the company of adult kids (especially a daughter) sounds nice.
No. 1869272
>>1869269Is 10 of your senile years being taken care of by strangers worth 20-30 years of your youth taking care of someone who might end up putting you in there anyways?
I'm genuinely asking, I wonder the same things as you
nonnie No. 1869291
>>1869278I will likely have saved more than enough money to pay somebody to take care of me, that is not the issue. But I'm so scared of being old, lying in bed in some "nice" elderly home and knowing that my life is basically over, that I can never do nice big things anymore, that all my chances for whatever are over now, basically just waiting for death. Having children in that situation would mean at least sometimes having somebody taking your mind off upcoming death or taking you to a cafe or celebrating your birthday/christmas with you.
I'm tearing up writing this, I don't want to get old…
No. 1869300
>>1869298Outliving children and my husband is something I am scared about. Dementia is horrific and I hope by the time I reach that age I'm able to take the pill so I dont have people suffering around me to look after me.
There is a bloodtest that can detect the protein that results in Alzheimer's up to 95% accuracy which is nice to know.
No. 1869304
>>1869297WTF this is some scrote mentality bullshit.
>oh make younger female friends so they can be your nannies and caretakers.Nah go fuck yourself, this is some parasitic scrote way of thinking. Old Scrotes date young women for that same reason, they want a free caretaker.
Women should not perform free labor, you want a woman to be your nanny or therapist then pay her.
No. 1869317
>>1869313Yeah.. Death is scary..
That's why I picked the medical field so I hopefully can research on how to extend it, if big pharma and the pharmaceutical industry lets me of course (unlikely)
No. 1869369
>>1869367This is actually my new resolution
I know a bunch of people who are super nice that I just neglected because I was busy worrying about my
toxic boyfriend
I feel bad for being foolish like that and I want to cultivate my friendship with these people
No. 1869374
File: 1706380498576.gif (1.71 MB, 245x167, tumblr_inline_nr1fbrQwaQ1qeou2…)
I had two apartment viewings today, the second one was meh but the first one was perfect. Unfortunately it was a group viewing, which means there were like 20+ people in this small apartment. And it's moments like this that make me act awkward because I'm stressed and I KNOW that I was all weird again when I talked to the landlord because I tend to stutter and shit. I wish I was more relaxed about all this but I've been looking for a new place for so long because my current living situation is driving me crazy but when it's a rejection again I know that I will have to wait another month or longer until I get another chance to view an apartment and living where I live now makes me want to jump out of skin. It also doesn't help that it feels like everybody around me is moving to new place and finding new apartments to move in a short amount of time but me being me is always the idiot that can't make it work, like it's always has been.
No. 1869375
>>1869346>"all men are like this"This is actually a good mantra, don't give the benefit of the doubt to any new guy you meet.
>"I'll end up dying alone"Nothing wrong with that imo.
No. 1869378
File: 1706380890146.png (616.19 KB, 828x802, GDWaPsvWoAAQCW1.png)
>>1869375But if you have walls and you are unapproachable then you won't be approached, right..?
No. 1869385
>>1869382Nah I checked that research by Paul Dolan was flawed
Made a lot of noise but ultimately it was based on not much and the data was irrelevant due to plain dishonesty from Dolan
https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2019/6/4/18650969/married-women-miserable-fake-paul-dolan-happiness No. 1869396
>>1869346Men are the ones who are happier in marriage and also the ones 6 times more likely to dump/divorce you if you get cancer or multiple sclerosis lol.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/11/091110105401.htmhttps://acsjournals.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/cncr.24577The study is from 2009, so the data is probably even worse now. Unless you get the most nigel of nigels, it really isn't worth it.
No. 1869400
>>1869346I used to take part in research groups before and the 'how happy are you as a person who is X or who has X lifestyle' ones always felt weird to me. Measuring stuff like
>>1869396 holds more solid weight than the endless attempts to create happiness guages for groups.
No. 1869402
>>1869368honestly i can excuse the pick mes and deluded bimbos because they're driven by biological urges, but my main issue is that some women i met in real life were straight up vile and
toxic for absolutely no fucking reason. like they weren't even doing this to win over a man, just messing up with other women and picking on them for their own enjoyment. i know everyone calls it "internalized misogyny" but to me it can't be described as anything else other than narcissistic behaviour
No. 1869405
>>1869400But then you'd have to make like a long list of all the things of life and then compare
You know what I mean?
Like maybe men are more likely to leave when you're sick, but they're more likely to stay with the woman when she's unemployed ; for example
You can't just cherry pick one aspect, that's being dishonest and that's what misogynistic scrotes do
No. 1869475
>>1869346You just got out of a relationship, relax and enjoy your own company for once. You should be friends with this
nonny >>1869081 lol
No. 1869535
>>1869514Every time you have minor stumble or do something vaguely athletic
>just wait until you're over 30, you'll be feeling that all weekNo bitch I won't because I eat well and I'm not obese like most of the population.
No. 1869578
File: 1706393518525.jpg (156.4 KB, 1233x787, MV5BNjliMzZjMmUtMTQ3OC00OTVhLW…)
>>1869572Lol do you look like this?
No. 1869591
>>1869576>>1869581Yeah, it's weird. I have long blond hair and bright grey eyes with golden partial heterochromia in the middle. People tend to gravitate towards me, but no one's been so outwardly rude? Maybe her moid was looking at me, classic lol
>>1869578Idk who that is
(cringe humblebragging) No. 1869598
File: 1706394596620.jpeg (270.95 KB, 1320x1000, IMG_1166.jpeg)
>>1868753I just want to post a full vent. My heart is all over the place lately, my job makes me depressed, EVERY job I’ve had makes me depressed. I feel like “the man” in my relationship and I’m so tired of having to do everything… and thinking about it more I had a feeling that friend liked me a few years ago but I just thought it went away? He never told me anything anyways. I don’t know, I don’t really think I feel anything towards that right now. I’ve been so apathetic and depressed to everything. The only thing that makes me happy is my cat and spending money and stupid characters I hyperfixiate and push my identity onto. I’m a mess.
No. 1869619
File: 1706396796717.jpg (11.8 KB, 229x220, download.jpg)
>phased by a moid I dated online with someone real and new after 10 months
My "idgaf" streak has been ruined. I swore never to e-date or date in general as it's just a pain in the ass. Thought I was past this, I feel silly
No. 1869651
>>1869298Never have I seen something that I resonate with more than this. It's like the concept of death and growing old is something I cannot even imagine. I don't want to ever stop living life and being old and knowing you have basically reached the end sounds terrifying. I don't want to die at all, I want to be like this forever. But also I want to blow my brains out at any minor inconvenience. I feel you
nonnie.
No. 1869666
File: 1706401300530.jpg (47.66 KB, 1200x600, crying.jpg)
Finished college 3 years ago, got a good job and now I'm just in a loop of:
Sleep, travel, work, travel, gym, cook, watch trashy TV while on social media, sleep, step one.
I got clean and sober and I thought things would be better but the only difference is that I go to the gym and don't enjoy trashy TV as much. This can't be the rest of my life, I don't want it but I need the loop to pay to stay in the loop. Fuck. I thought I would have adventures and cool stuff once I had money but that's like 2 weeks a year. Humans shouldn't live like this. I relapsed today and it's the best I've felt in ages.
Anyway white girl wine whining. Assonance is fun.
No. 1869679
File: 1706402874411.jpeg (30.99 KB, 736x736, df823dd8-7217-4d71-aa2d-f0415c…)
been seeing this moid and fucked with him a few times. he told me he was inlove, but we both aren't mentally stable for a relationship (even though he wants things to get more serious). so tonight he is on a rave and I'm actually very sad because he isn't messaging me. why the fuck am i sad… pic related - me when i say i don't care
No. 1869686
>>1869671Thanks anon. I grew up in council house so I just went with accounting because I thought it would the safest degree. During college I worked in cafes and bars and work sucked but it was also fun? Everyone there was fun and interesting. This just feels like nothing. Loop life. If I had the chance and the money was good I would go back to waitressing in a heartbeat.
I hope I don't sound condescending. That's not my intent.
No. 1869690
>>1869686Good on you for working hard, anon. I’m sorry it doesn’t feel rewarding right now. I know you mentioned you go to the gym in your free time, but do you think you’d find more value and reward in a sport or hobby? Something that has a community and a sense of accomplishment? I find the gym to be so sterile and dystopian, and I wonder if you need to find something that you love doing that makes the daily dredge worth it.
I’m retraining as a nurse and it’s hard thinking that every work day for the rest of my life is probably going to be stressful. The registered nurses tell us that you need to build a life outside of your job otherwise you won’t last - but I think that goes for any profession.
I agree that retail and hospitality is easy and sometimes fun, but it’s just so insecure. You’re building a good solid future now. That’s what I’m telling myself too haha. Good luck
nonnie No. 1869719
File: 1706406683610.png (154.87 KB, 1024x592, literally_me.png)
I lost about 30kg last year and I decided to order some new clothes. I measured myself and just lost it. I'm normal weight now but I just feel like some broad-shouldered XXL blob. I haven't felt like this since I was teenager and it's ridiculous.
No. 1869750
>>1869735Don't worry about time! Take the risk if you don't truly have any major responsibilities right now. Your 20's is all about taking risks and learning about yourself.
Semi relevant but I had to restart my career path because covid happened and my tourism diploma (and I graduated right before covid happened) was pretty much useless. I ended up going into the medical field but needed to take another 2 year course to qualify, so I ended up graduating at 31. I'm two years into this new career and I like it so far, and I like that I'm always able to branch out if I choose to go back to school.
No. 1869761
File: 1706409871139.jpg (252.72 KB, 1200x1200, EtZYwiXWYAEiBMT.jpg)
It's so fucking funny when people post their nudes and try to pretend it's some noble and grand act of empowerment and radical autonomy.. aint nobody care what you got to say whore just post it and go. You will never be Wonho.
No. 1869789
File: 1706412223910.jpg (48.55 KB, 468x468, cigtired.jpg)
Drank vodka to the point I vomited everywhere and passed out. Part of me wishes I had just died choking on my vomit in my sleep. Part of me feels tired of living, and the other part of me wants to believe there's more to life than this. Part of me believes It's all down hill from here.
No. 1869803
>>18692691: this is a male scare tactic to scare women into marriage, just like the wall. Common among moids obsessed with race.
2: most people in nursing homes have children who either are too busy to care for them or don’t care.
3: if your too old to care for yourself, it’s time to end your life.
No. 1869822
File: 1706414869084.png (1.83 MB, 800x800, 46beb823c548631cc5d42d729dca63…)
i love wasting an entire day because of a migraine!!! i look forward to this every week because it seems like without fail this happens every time i have a day off! if humans spend a quarter of their lives sleeping then i must be spending an additional quarter laying in total darkness and doing nothing. that's half my life down the shitter i should have died in my mother's womb.
No. 1869832
File: 1706415333132.jpeg (110 KB, 896x597, IMG_3650.jpeg)
I hate these new shitty normie houses. They piss me off like they are so uninspired. They just feel so dead and empty. They are so ugly but demand your attention through their size. Where is the symmetry? The color? The ornamentation? What’s up with the huge front lawn devoid of plant life? Why do they have two giant garages spoiling the front? Why do they have 5 different types of windows? Why do normal fags prefer this shit? If you’re going to make a cheap ass house you can still make it look nice by giving it some fucking color and keeping the garage detached behind the home. If i ever can afford a house i want a small gigastacy pink house with a beautiful lawn instead of this moid garage house.
No. 1869834
File: 1706415415756.png (422.62 KB, 500x604, wishthiswereme.png)
I'm really scared of getting old
I think my biggest fear is getting old with regrets over how i lived my life, and diseases, some old people get sick only when they're old and with the body getting to a certain age you just can't take it anymore, i've seen my old relatives in a bad state and it really scares me and makes me sad at the same time, so i guess it stems from there.
It's weird to me because it all sounds so exciting until you turn 60 kek, i really do look forward to turning 30-50 and recalling what i've learned or whatever, i think i just grew up with the idea of getting older relating to being and wiser, smarter, and more experienced, maybe i'll just get old and continue to be retarded KEK
>>1869826
i don't know anything about houses but those two windows next to eachother up there look weird…kind of ugly imo
No. 1869875
I'm devastated. I finally told my crush about my feelings and to my surprise and happiness he said he felt the same about me and that he feels honoured, but that now he was obligated to tell me something about himself because it would be pivotal for me to decide whether I even want to be with him or not, and he also said that he had something to do and as long as he won't fix this, nobody will be able to be happy with him in a relationship. He broke up with his ex 3 months ago and that "thing" was the main reason for the break up. He said he doesn't feel worthy of me and the people who like him, and that he's a bad son to his parents. I asked him what's it about. Turned out, 10 years ago, when he was 23, he was severely addicted to gambling and he took many, many loans, not all of them were from banks, most were easy loans. His family was helping him with paying it off. But to this day he didn't pay off everything, he said he's about half way through, but some of the payday loans companies he took loans from don't even exist anymore, and there's no way to find out if that debt went to some other company or not etc. He wants to save as much money as he can, he said that things like being in a relationship will only slow this down, because he has to pay more for an apartment instead of just renting a room somewhere, also that of course he would spend money on his girlfriend and mutual expenses and that would also put him in constant stress. He said he's ashamed to even go to his home country and see his parents. They love him a lot and always say everything is fine, but it's pretty obvious they've been through a lot of stress because of their son's problems, his dad got a heart disease etc. I got so sad about it all I actually started crying. He told me I had too much empathy and he didn't deserve this. He always seemed so level headed to me. I'm just sad that he wasted his youth like this, and is still wasting his life because of his past mistakes. Now I feel so torn apart. I had a huge crush on him, I also wanted someone I could rely on, but if he himself tells me he won't be able to make another person happy or be happy himself as long as he doesn't pay all his debt, I kinda feel like it's pointless. I'm so sad and disappointed
No. 1869926
My bf of 2 years hyped up the idea of me meeting his family as a big deal when we first got together. That if we didn't get along, we'd have to break up blah blah. I never cared about him meeting mine since I have over 30 immediate family members and they all mostly only speak Spanish ( he's Filipino ).
Fast forward to now, and my family basically adopted him. My mom cooks him big homemade meals every time he visits. She even makes his family some food, but one time she made them mole and my bf told me how they dissed it. Made me upset but I kept quiet.
We decided to split Christmas this year. He came over, and EVERY one of my 9 aunts/uncles and some of my cousins gave him gifts. Even with the language barrier, they still try their best for him.
He ends up getting sick with a fever that night, and by morning, when it's time to go to his family house, he's really bad. My parents baby him with medicine and food and so much care and concern. They pack him extra food for his family and I spend all day preparing some appetizers for his family to drop off. We head out, I drop off the snacks I made, and take him to his house. I feed him, make him take a covid test ( negative), and clean up for him. He eventually passes out, and I sit in his dark room for over 5 hours with not a single bit of food or water all day. His family knows him here, taking care of him. His step dad eventually drops off food for him and I'm so excited.
They didn't pack a single thing for me. I saw their spread and they had big steaks, catering, so many charcuterie boards and snacks. And nothing for me.
I felt so humiliated. I don't want to seem like I'm being selfish and overreacting so I never brought it up but I'm slowly realizing how little his family even tries for me. I've been having issues with my bf for a while so it's not a big loose but I hate him much care and love we've given this guy and his family and they just say rude things about my mom's cooking and don't even bother giving me a fucking cookie.
No. 1869936
File: 1706428353667.gif (150.84 KB, 400x267, 1704782779856787.gif)
I feel like I had a switch go off after an accident I had as a young teen. Nothing has been right since. No matter how hard I try, I can't flip it back. It's like the world can sense it too. It's bizarre, and sometimes I feel like I'm not me and I'm being pulled out of my body. I've been suicidal since then but didn't start actually trying until 4 years ago. I did dream a lot about dying and wishing I'd have an aneurysm, I still do. Lately I've been waking up panicked and my chest has been hurting for almost 2 years. Probably from me doing those stupid things, but I don't have the money to go to the doctor. I feel something is coming but it's getting harder to care.
No. 1869951
Everything that I've wanted from my life is to have artistic freedom and have friends. I struggle with mental illness, physical illness, I've been emotionally abused my whole life and I've always been into fashion, music ETC basically my whole life I've just wanted artistic freedom and I come from an incredibly regressive and insane family.
A couple of months ago I got harassed by leftists on Facebook. I made a post about a philosopher that I like very much. Heidegger. Then some girl that lives the life that I've always wanted to live. She has a lot of piercings, tattoos, friends, is going to parties. I'm 25 and struggling with severe mental health issues, physical illness, still trying to escape my insane and abusive family. She commented on my post and said "he was a nazi". Obviously, I'm not reading Heidegger bcuz of him being a nazi. My life is really bad and nearly 99% of my life I have been surrounded by hatred, harassment and negativity especially surrounding the things that I like .
My life is miserable. I posted a philosopher that I really enjoy. My Facebook posts get no likes or positive interaction. You had to say the most negative thing about something that I like when my life is already miserable.
I told her that his Philosophy is very good and I'm not concerned about him being a nazi. Then, she and her friend got into an argument with me for like one day. Where they basically turned me into this Nazi racist which is so far cut off from my values. I kept repeating that I am mentally and physically ill, that I've struggled with poverty my whole life, that I have leftist and progressive values and my whole life I've just wanted to have artistic freedom.
WHY ARE YOU SPENDING 24 HOURS HARASSING A MENTALLY ILL WOMAN AND TURNING HER INTO A NAZI. THERE ARE TRADTHOTS AND ACTUAL NAZIS ON THE INTERNET. WHY HARASS ME FOR 24 FUCKING HOURS WHEN IM AT THE END OF MY ROPES. USE THAT TIME TO HARASS NAZIS. My life makes no sense and the way that people treat me also makes no sense.
No. 1869962
>>1869961Wish they would place all that effort to harass actual Nazis and tradthots. Instead of a mentally ill woman. I'm not even
problematic.
>>1869959I hope that you get hit by a car and die
(alogging) No. 1869985
File: 1706432809540.jpg (23.4 KB, 405x360, 1000002320.jpg)
>>1869974Don't talk to me you're probably one of the actual bonafide retards I'm talking about. An icepick couldn't puncture some of your thick ass heads.
>I've gotten sucked into an infightYou could literally just not respond, nobody is forcing your hand to argue
(stop) No. 1870035
File: 1706441111677.jpg (104.3 KB, 1280x720, 1000000281.jpg)
Premenstrual depression is beating my ass. I haven't gotten out of bed since Friday. I see no point in doing anything. It kills me to see my bf healthy and happy, going out, going on walks meanwhile I'm rotting away in bed and feeling like the worst person in the world.
No. 1870106
I am grown as fuck and I still feel so guilty for liking women. It's not that I'm oogling women or doing something, whenever I'm just existing and something happens that makes me become aware of the fact that I'm attracted to women, and I want to date them, I want to rip out my hair and die. That's really dramatic, I'm sorry. I just feel bad. Living in a muslim country doesn't help with this I guess. I know I'd be shunned, or worse, if anyone knew. I just want to feel normal about my attraction to women, I know there's nothing wrong with it, logically, but whenever I catch myself thinking about dating or being with someone, I feel this pit in my stomach.
No. 1870228
>>1870219Don't feel bad for needing your parents
nonnie. Just Because you turn twenty one or eighteen doesn't mean that you don't have parents anymore. My parents are the same as yours and i've come to realize that regular parents stick around for their children before and after they become adults. I know it hurts. Hugs.
No. 1870295
File: 1706470504617.png (207.35 KB, 446x473, 3kk9xq.png)
God, pleaso no. Curse my adhd brain. I can't afford the time to hyperfixate on this media right now. I thought it wasn't that bad when I delegated two weeks of thinking about it non-stop in july, but now? With all of my deadlines and shit? I really need to work, but instead I can only watch, listen, breathe and draw this this this FUCK MY ADHD
No. 1870375
File: 1706474785562.jpg (152.38 KB, 516x625, 1661256148967457.jpg)
How to get over the fact the majority of men literally think it's OK to fool women for sex?
Like the majority of men literally have been conditioned by porn and their genes to see you as a piece of steak?
No. 1870396
File: 1706475594394.png (20.15 KB, 275x212, 1000020273.png)
was wanting a specific thread in /snow/ for so long but now that we've got it people keep shitting up the thread by derailing and posting a bunch of off-topic things they think = milk
No. 1870664
File: 1706498580284.gif (1.43 MB, 275x207, 1693550252239.gif)
I feel so dumb. I sell stuff online and I finally made a mistake in the 500+ transactions I've had in the past year–I mixed up some items I sent out! The worst part is that these items were the only ones of their kind listed online so even I refunded the buyers there's no way they'd be able to get it again. Getting the items returned and sent out enough would be a huge loss, too. I don't know how people live with guilt sometime, tbh, like, this is my one "job", yet I still make such a ridiculous mistake.
No. 1870689
File: 1706501315845.png (1.94 MB, 1170x2532, 353EDBAC-9E4E-4684-8361-64396A…)
I come in after many, many moons n this is what I see. Get it together.
No. 1870698
File: 1706503183805.jpeg (27.93 KB, 470x652, IMG_5945.jpeg)
I hate my partner’s nephew. He’s only 5 but already has such scrotal energy. He’s also verbally retarded and because he has the vocab and sentence structure of a 3 year old, he resorts to kicking, punching, screaming and pinching to express his frustrations. Anyway my partner is always trying to convince me of what a likeable kid he is (probably knowing deep down he’s a disappointing irritating little shit). The other day he bit me and took a chunk out of one of my favorite t shirts. My partner was all like “don’t worry, she has plenty of t shirts” to his parents so they didn’t feel that bad to buy me a new one, It was my favorite one and I kinda expected my partner to replace it but this was 1 week ago so I guess that’s not happeneing. I’m still seething about it even though I know logically I DO have a lot of t shirts. I would be fine to just never see this moid child again for multiple reasons.
No. 1870773
File: 1706508561610.jpg (47.39 KB, 1080x944, 1000002433.jpg)
I have thought about this since I was little and im so serious, it was one of those questions I felt like i couldn't ask anyone and was not supposed to think about. I pondered over it many times. I am relieved to find out I was never the only one, we all think the same retarded shit, none of us are special.(being retarded enough to post an image that says "my balls" on lolcow.farm)
No. 1870776
>>1870664Forgive yourself
nonny it's ok everyone makes mistakes
No. 1870797
File: 1706512717167.jpg (64.64 KB, 882x1390, man-rocking-back-and-forth-on-…)
Night shifts are doing me in. Keeping me out of trouble too though, and moneyed. I don't know how long I can continue or if this is worth a big chunk of my 20's or how I figure that out, maybe it's better to feel like the walking dead than a waste of breathe. It's better than the depression but it's not good, but my Nigel is here too sometimes, I am Good at it, very well liked by customers, on average tolerated by colleagues for my autism, earning enough for now. But I no longer remember sunlight being the norm, I work so hard that my metabolism is going sick and it's hard to keep up with a background ED, mental health is like a seesaw, I don't know if I'll ever be promoted, shit is fucked. Frankly I'm losing it but the means are not present to change it and I don't know what to do.
No. 1871000
File: 1706534269019.jpg (75.22 KB, 700x736, angry-kittens-105.jpg)
having an awful morning and i still have a bunch more shit i need to take care of today
No. 1871026
File: 1706538221637.jpg (21.97 KB, 235x354, 241686723_580169326342568_8282…)
Been years since I last had sex, I haven't felt any sort of lust for months so I felt like I could live just fine as a monk for the rest of my life. But since my last period all I can think about is sex, I don't know what made my hormones go crazy but I'm going crazy. It's like I suddenly turned into a teenager and is almost climbing the walls. I already decided I'm not going to have sex with anyone unless we're dating because I'm done with casual sex so I downloaded tinder again (I know some people mostly know it as a sex app but in my country it ended up being mainly a dating-app and several people I know met their significant other there so I figured I could give it a try) and obsessively staring at the chats I started with the matches I'm super attracted to and seem to have similar interests with me, hoping for a reply.
No. 1871244
File: 1706553953427.jpeg (53.85 KB, 684x454, IMG_7608.jpeg)
I can't stand being alone anymore. I have come to the conclusion I'm my most destructive when alone and that I've had too many episodes in this house to the point where it almost sets me off to be in it. I have pretty much nowhere else to go, though, so I'm between a rock and a hard place. Maybe I do need to go to inpatient treatment or a retreat treatment center or something, this isn't working. I have no friends left who I'm communicating with who'd let me stay with them, I don't want to make my dad help me pay lease on an apartment when I'm still jobless, and I relapsed twice whilst I was alone. I feel like I'm 17 again, and I can't stand it. Can point out all the spots in this house where I've had episodes, all the fricking creaking noises it makes, the cracks in the foundation of the ceiling. My father has also heavily neglected to take care of it even prior to me having nine thousand mental breakdowns, so it's never been a cleanly, nice place to live in.
Can't seem to find any DBT groups in my area that are female only. It has to be female only. I do not feel fucking comfortable discussing my problems or trauma in front of men. There was one listed that was male only, of fucking course, no women's. I'll try searching again. I nxt talk to my therapist on weds and my psychiatrist in about two weeks. I just upped my meds dosage. The problem is, the meds put my extreme psychomotor and mood swinging at ease, but it hasnt cured my triggers entirely, and I understand it'll take time for it to work, this will hopefully be my max dosage, and I'll add a support drug, but I can't stand how long recovery is taking when I lost my job and am now pissing away my dads money because I have no savings. I've tried selling clothes and other belongings only to get very little return and now I'm thinking about trying to sell art, but I'm afraid I won't make much off it either (I'm not a good artist, even if I have a unique style but I'm sure someone will pay me a few bucks)
I'm truly sorry to my one supportive family members and all the friends I've lost that I'm a shitty person who fell into this cycle and couldn't get out until I lost nearly everyone I cared about. I really did care about them, I was just trapped in what being traumatized by events from the last couple years did to me.
No. 1871292
>>1871252I didn't buy a bubbler only because google told me betta fish don't like a lot of movement in their water. I'll look into buying maybe just a small bubble stone for him so there's some movement and oxygen flow. He's started swimming around a bit more since i made the post so i think that's a good sign at least?
>>1871144>>1871111I really hope he's ok, he looked pretty healthy in comparison to the others. i felt bad picking just one fish out of all the sad fish in cups
No. 1871358
File: 1706560468613.jpeg (72.98 KB, 1280x853, IMG_7730.jpeg)
>>1871290I believe he hacked me too which explains how and why he followed me across platforms, but I don't have proof. Had to change my discord account. He may have my dox. I still struggle when I'm left alone with extreme paranoia he'll show up at my door. constantly deleting, come back on alts, I'm sure he uses VPNs. There's no way to prove what happened to a court of law or the police. All I could do was quit social media as an active user which I did for months. For now he's stopped, and I've been in therapy. he knew I was mentally fragile, immature, and I made the mistake at times to tell him to fuck off. but I do wonder what drove his obsession and hatred. Something missing in his life? Mommy didn't love him? Well neither did mine. Nobody wants to deal with the Internet Joe Goldberg. Nobody should have to deal with the internet Joe Goldberg.
Anyone who says the internet is cutthroat and to just suck it up, log off when it comes to something that incessant has clearly never experienced the worst of the worst. Barbaric doesn't begin to cover it. And for the record I also hate the scum sucking attention whores who bother you in public wanting to record their TikTok's and how desperate people are for clout. I don't care about internet fame, all I wanted was semi anonymous fun, and it's been completely desecrated. The internet isn't just slowly shifting towards being unsafe and less anonymous, it's shifting towards corporate takeover and the annoyance of incels and moids trying to invade women's spaces. Like the sudden burst of trad content on TikTok and twitter, and far rightoid men pushing it, and then lefty men pushing women into sex work. There's not much amnesty for women who don't want to be exploited, I guess. If we don't fall into it, we're harassed one way or another
I've given up on showing my face, my voice, or being too revealing on main, unless it's with women I trust. I have a few small long term discord group chats that I joined before stalker, a new and fairly conservative reddit that I don't think he's seen, that's it. Burnt me out.
No. 1871360
>>1871358This happened to me too
nonny and really takes the joy out of being on the internet. Men ruin everything.
No. 1871379
>>1871360Not the first instance of dealing with it either, previously dealt with moids spreading revenge porn of me a few years before stalker.
You ever wish you could telepathically kill a fucker through a screen?
The revenge I'd fucking have on these scrotes if I had their locations and the money to track them down…
No. 1871380
File: 1706561853427.png (469.25 KB, 1024x1004, 1701910021130878.png)
Why do moids always make disgusting beastiality jokes online when a girl talks about her pet dog… and the level of brainrot to immediately think about sex when a girl talks about her dog?? who does that? I really need to figure out a way to filter english posts from my twitter
No. 1871404
File: 1706562726026.jpg (92.04 KB, 800x800, 1702260301954.jpg)
First day of my period. throwing up violently
No. 1871504
Nonnies WHAT. THE. FUCK. I started seeing my male coworker recently, we were only out two times, but talking for 5-7 hours and I like him a lot. He broke up with his gf 3 months ago, but nobody at work, except me, knows when that happened, people only know they're not together anymore. I have this extremely toxic narcissistic female coworker who used to bully me and then giving me cold/hot treatment all the time, she's a huge gossiper and always talks behind people's back. I finally cut ties with her and now we haven't talked to each other for like 4 weeks. So… This evening he asked if I would like to go with him for a walk. We talked for 2 hours and then stopped at a kid's playground, I sat on a swing and he was standing in front of me, we were talking about our childhood and stuff. It was almost midnight. And suddenly I see someone on a bike passing right next to us, I noticed a familiar backpack. He turned around right at the moment when she was passing through and looking at us and he faced her, and when she passed, he turned back
to me and said "guess who just passed us by". It was her. Going back from work. Out of all fucking places and ways in this town, she had to choose that one and see us. This is unbelievable. We both started laughing, totally shocked but then it kinda hit me. I'm scared because she will definitely tell everyone and people will gossip and probably think we had a romance while he was still in a relationship and it's all my fault and shit. We basically never talked to each other until one week ago. But people are people. Seriously, in two days I'm going on holidays for 2 weeks and I'm already afraid of coming back. I'm very weak when it comes to stuff like that, getting looks and gossip. I feel so uncomfortable. I know we haven't done anything bad and nobody should give a fuck. But I'm just weak
No. 1871527
File: 1706574771874.jpeg (24.45 KB, 592x352, IMG_5538.jpeg)
I want a boyfriend
No. 1871539
>>1871105Late, but an office fish sounds pretty difficult to deal with. Bettas are kind of a lot of work. Most of the bettas you see at pet stores already have fin rot from excess ammonia (easy to happen in a tiny cup) and are already feeling sickly. If you didn't slowly introduce him to new tank water that was already conditioned and heated, it's possible he's just struggling with the shock. The "proper" thing to do is to cycle your tank first (establishing a nitrogen cycle), but most people don't. So ultimately, it's up to your fish to either be hardy enough to acclimate or, well, he won't. You should get a filter if you haven't already, sponge filters are better for bettas since it's gentler on their delicate fins if they run into it. Methylene blue is a miraculous treatment for bettas that are on the edge, but if you overdose them, it's bad, and also it's super messy and stains everything, so I wouldn't recommend it for an office context. A less intrusive solution might be Indian almond leaves or some other tannin-rich leaf, which will help balance the pH. Also, most people put bettas in tiny tanks, but they prefer at least 5 gallons, preferably 10. Oh, and the strips aren't always reliable, so it might be worth it to invest in something like the API Master test kit for freshwater tanks. That's assuming you want to commit to something like this, like I said bettas are honestly much more work than you might assume and it seems like it'd be overwhelming to have to deal with this all at once. There's also fish forums like FishLore and FishForums if you want to go more in depth and ask more questions. I fucked up a lot with my first few bettas thinking they'd be easy to deal with, but one time I had one that was pure white from the store and he seemed like he was definitely going to die because I didn't cycle my tank, but then he ended up recovering and being vibrant pink and purple. Lived 3 years. Good luck nona.
No. 1871542
File: 1706576150725.jpg (78.8 KB, 828x786, 1000002432.jpg)
>>1871527Girl me too this socks
No. 1871544
>>1871541THAN
* deleted and reposted and didn’t even fix my typo smh
No. 1871628
>>1871621>>1871622To be clear, I'm pretty sure I don't have to clean the bathrooms, pretty sure. But generally the backrooms are disgusting and now I know why they didn't interview me in the staff areas kek
The whole place smells awful though, so thank you for the vaporub tip.
No. 1871647
File: 1706590703165.jpg (230.24 KB, 843x897, catto6.jpg)
I wish I kept up drawing and improving into adulthood. I use to draw so much when I was a teen, I remember watching sailor moon and trying to draw watever senshi appeared in the current episode I was watching. I did the worst thing and threw out my binder full of the drawings because I was so embarrassed, they were bad drawings but at least I could look back at them. I just don't have the attention span to study and I dislike following guides.Maybe I should try watercolor painting.
No. 1871679
File: 1706594572125.jpeg (246.89 KB, 750x758, IMG_6134.jpeg)
I wish I did not have so much hate in my heart.
Making a therapist appointment but I don’t even believe in therapy. Does anyone ever get better? The most dysfunctional insufferable people I know are therapy shills or therapists kek
No. 1871697
>>1871693Thanks
nonny, I will go with an open mind. I think a workbook will be the backup plan if therapy is fruitless and irritating.
No. 1871718
File: 1706598477080.jpg (26.36 KB, 500x280, be320387e1b4417d841d61d81c8e4b…)
I'm not even a poorfag, just a middle class regular girl from the countryside, but going into the academic field is really violent when you get confronted with the social class gap. It feels like 90% of the people I'm meeting are extremely rich people who got to the top schools in the country, have so much classical cultural references that I lack, they even have a distinct way of talking that automatically sets me apart from them. It's not like I didn't know that, but the feeling of always being an intruder that doesn't belong is giving me a lot of self-doubt. It feels like I internalized the class system so much that I think lowly of myself. The thought of competing with someone who lives in a castle (not kidding, there are a few) to get a funding is sickening to me… like what funds do you need ? I hope I don't get too bitter and it pushes me to work harder to overthrow that social order, but right now I just feel sick of it.
No. 1871737
File: 1706600640094.png (288.62 KB, 500x375, tumblr_n2gm5chtK91rdcqsxo1_500…)
This has to be some sort of cruel joke. I promised myself at the end of last year that by February I would delete all my dating apps, break off my situationship, free myself from the wickedness of man and live my best nun life for the rest of 2024. Now with only a few days to spare, within the past 12 hours I've had two old dates from 2 and 3 months ago clamber back into my DMs begging for another chance, and the guy I'm fooling around with (who was supposed to have left the country by now) tell me that he thinks he's falling for me. When I was an ugly loveless teenage loser all I could do was dream about having multiple guys want to date me, and now that I do all I want is for them to leave me alone. It's not fair.
No. 1871746
File: 1706602043205.jpg (33.96 KB, 520x289, hunger-games-battle-royale-wit…)
Every time I see that "cultural effects of the quarantine" thread with its hunger games threadpic I get annoyed because I'm reminded of how Suzanne Collins tried claiming that she had never heard of Battle Royale in her life and it's totally her original story donut steel. Sure, an elimination game is not a new concept at all, but she even included the same fascist government plot, teens killing each other, the televising of the contest for entertainment and societal commentary but as a dumbed down version made more on the nose for the YA audience. Koushun Takami said that the idea for Battle Royale was based on a nightmare that he had and the rest was inspired by "Long Walk" by Stephen King so at least he was honest about it.
The reason it pisses me off so much is because a lot of American authors feel like foreign media isn't "important enough" to be credited as an inspiration while constantly taking influence from it, they just count on the language barrier protecting them from being found out. As an ESLfag it sort of makes me depressed to see ideas from smaller and/or more obscure countries being treated as prototypes for "the real American adaptation". It would've been fine if Collins did admit that she drew inspiration from BR but the fact that she was even offended by the idea was really shitty. I also hate that Hunger Game fans get their tits in a knot every time someone even dares to suggest that maybe it was inspired by Battle Royale because NOOOOO SHE'S A LITERARY GENIUS BATTLE ROYALE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MUH HUNGER GAMES.
No. 1871768
File: 1706604829221.jpg (67.92 KB, 720x973, FwMYN8GWIA4a5hh.jpg)
Fat women and ex fat women are so terrible to other fat ladies, Jesus. I've tried to be nice and treat others the way I want to be treated (aka not saying anything about their body back, but instead telling them to not speak on my appearance), but it's mostly women fatter than me so fuck it I'm going to start being an asshole. I can't imagine being Amberlynn Reid and going through this on a large scale.
No. 1871869
File: 1706616615385.jpg (123.95 KB, 1298x972, 1000016748.jpg)
Man I just feel like shit. How do I stop being jealous about my friends having fun without me
No. 1871904
>>1871593one of the first things i did when dating my nigel was to look what his male relatives hairlines looked like, his dad has a full set of thick hair even at and old age so i should be safe kek
sorry for you though, maybe you could convince him to get a hair transplant?
No. 1871908
I could probably take this to meta but I’m not trying to file a genuine complaint here, I just want to bitch.
The weirdo double standards in different threads makes me not want to post anymore. On the Shayna thread, I see anons reply with something to the effect of “This is so funny” and get banned for low effort. Then, on scumbags, someone posted a GRADUATED cow’s baby photo MORE THAN ONCE, despite 0 milk,& they literally added in redtext to the double posted identical pic“stop reporting this it doesnt break rules”. Then a post in the exact same thread gets redtext for telling a blogposting newfag they won’t spoonfeed them? So saying you refuse to spoonfeed IS breaking the rules, but reposting a totally milkless photo of a graduated cow’s infant child more than once in the same thread is not only okay, but directly defended?? Letting the original upload stay on the thread I understand, but how is REposting a milkpess photo that already got posted in the same thread ok in a snow thread??
I know it’s Hellweek, but I needed to vent
No. 1871909
>>1871593Lmao my ex catfished me with his balding, he had hardly any on top and it was receding at age 21 when I started dating him.
His gf has made him grow it instead of shaving it and it looks 1000x worse then when he would shave it with me.
My husband now has a gorgeous full head of hair with no balding in his family. I didnt realize how much I loved hair until I dumped my ex.
Good luck nonna, just know if you have any kids with him they will bald too
No. 1871920
File: 1706622687461.png (223.55 KB, 538x300, 1.png)
>>1871620I've been into cleaning jobs for 2 years now and scraping stuff from toilets hasn't been a huge problem, mostly people who vomited and crapped in the toiled and around it, just get the appropriate stuff you need, like a mask and gloves
Other info: there is a series called The Cleaning Lady out, check it out
No. 1871933
File: 1706623317188.png (Spoiler Image,121.74 KB, 330x322, 2.png)
>>1870773>>1870774The balls of her feet.
They can hurt due to several problems, including calluses and corns
No. 1871943
I know i should just dump him but I'm just tired. Moid knows I'm super sick, meant to come by to clean the kitchen (he'd promised he'd do it later on sunday. He didnt.) and see me. Nah, comes after I already took care of all the animals. Been doing laundry and all that.. naaah, he won't stay over he's already so tired. Asked him to at least take all the carton in the kitchen with him. (Ive now been sick since friday) even though he promised me to do it sunday, and then just didn't.. didn't even take all the carton, left half behind even if I told him to please take all of it.. "I didn't see it, sorry" like you didn't see your smashed up cereal boxes? Then he calls me, he'll be back for the carton today? Tried telling him no, because I straight up don't want to see his face when he'll just do shit half arsed and I'm fucking tired of being sick and life. "No, I promised" fuck off and respect my "no" now. There's no fixing this right now, youre just making my aversion to you worse. You damn well know I'm already removing myself emotionally.
Could come right after work today for example, but no, he wants to go skating first….
No. 1871969
>>1871593My exes dad wore a hairpiece, was never seen without it and apparently was really sensitive about it. It was treated like a delicate family secret that I was entrusted with knowing one day. But looking back I must've been blind for not spotting it earlier. Male hairpieces just aren't something that were on my radar I guess. I thought he had weird hair but that's it. Man had been sticking this thing to his head for decades.
Shortly after we broke up he started rapidly going bald too. Ngl I was like thank fuck we broke up over something else because I would've been coping hard and probably trying to be that sensitive 'it doesn't matter' gf all while his strange shaped head was more and more on display. I'm not fussed about height, there's plenty of desired traits I don't see the fuss about but that would've sucked to still be around for. Esp with the sensitivity his dad showed around it and how it was this tip-toe around it issue. I got out just in time.
No. 1872013
File: 1706628090881.jpeg (7.33 KB, 131x153, 1702709366248.jpeg)
It's cold, I'm hungry but lazy. I guess this is a tea and honey nutrition day then.
No. 1872082
File: 1706633277063.jpeg (119.74 KB, 819x1024, 30077763_199411113996395_21093…)
For various reasons I don't really feel I can adopt a dog where I live right now. Still, when I go over to my parents' house I can see their dogs. One girl is turning 15 soon, and she's a slow old teddy bear. I've known her since she was a puppy and I give her as much love as I can since I don't know if she'll be here in a year.
Now the vent, maybe. The other one is…just over a year old and big. I hate to judge, but my parents don't do much to discipline her. She's not aggressive, but still gets into everything, growls at me if I scare her (usually by moving too fast) and doesn't really listen to commands even after a year with them. I only go over once a week at most (they live almost an hour away) but I wonder if there's anything I can do to help. I offered to take the pup on a walk but she has two modes: stop and sniff every two seconds or full steam ahead. The last part made me think about getting her a walking harness since she seemed to be hurting her throat walking so fast with a normal leash. Maybe it's not my place, but she's a 60 pound dog and I do worry that if she gets out she wouldn't hurt someone necessarily, but she would bark and rush at someone because she's excited and untrained. She's not a pit or bull dog, but she has a bit of another "aggressive breed" (others' stereotype, not mine) in her (rottweiler). Maybe I'm just being overly concerned but after seeing how well other people train their dogs I get a bit judgy when I see people let their dogs stay brats and wonder why they're, well, brats.
Pic is stock photo, not her. But close enough.
No. 1872160
>>1867763It's so annoying when this one group of people look at my screen at coffee shops when I'm doing any sort of analysis. How about you go back to barely passing Step 2 and worry about other things, yeah? Don't even get me started on one of their moids that hits on 20 year old students attempting to get into our school. I have half a mind to bring up ethics with the ombudsman if he's guaranteeing spots in his lab to sleep with younger students. There's been a case of a student raping another student at a mixer, another student in that same group from Pakistan admitted to intentionally giving the black and mexican patients the wrong dose, and somebody revenge posting nudes on the internet.
This school is such a shit show behind the scenes and I wish people would stop looking at it as this prestigious college.
No. 1872199
File: 1706641027914.jpeg (49.24 KB, 492x219, 3EF58139-2AE0-452D-99A7-E6BC15…)
Want to have a drink so fucking badly but I always got something going on the next day and I hate drinking during the day. I'd drink after work on Saturday if I didn't get home at 2am.
No. 1872246
File: 1706646122195.png (370.59 KB, 634x487, 1643052904180.png)
Listening to 80s music makes me so depressed. I wish i wasnt a teen in the 2010s, growing up with Youtube and mobile phones completly screwed me up. I dont think i have a single good memory of my teenage years due to everyone being on their phone instead of enjoying life. I read all the comments of boomers under these songs talking about how they heard this song while on a trip with their family or some other important moment in their life and i am so jealous of them. Why did i have to be born in the era of smartphones, why. I cant even go have lunch with friends without them pulling out their fucking phone to look at discord. I just want to experience life without smartphones. I dont even use discord and i only use my phone for calls and i feel so isolated.
No. 1872320
>>1872312I'm seriously sick of that shit, some nice stories with decent plots are basically ruined to me the moment I see two people making out and fondling each other, it's obnoxious at this point, I actually felt so refreshed when I watched that shit aquaman movie because no one was fucking.
At this point I basically only watch animated movies and cartoons, I just want to escape from reality.
No. 1872328
>>1871742Slept 3 hours. Mouth still hurts. I tried to ease it with a salt rinse since that's supposed to help swollen gums. I read somewhere that mouth and gum pain could be a side effect of lamotrigane but I never had it when I was on it before. I just increased dosage. Please fucking tell me I'm not gonna have to change to a different bipolar medication. I can't take the grind and I don't want anything that'll make me weight gain. Having this disorder makes me really wanna fucking kill myself even when I'm not suicidal.
Fuck. It hurts so much. Gonna pay first installment for dental insurance asap and squeeze an appointment in to see what the fuck is wrong. Feel like screaming.
No. 1872363
File: 1706653028905.jpg (33.47 KB, 750x412, 1000015555.jpg)
been feeling this more and more. how do you flirt with women who potentially are straight without coming off too strong and scaring them away
No. 1872367
File: 1706653237601.jpeg (23.36 KB, 201x250, IMG_3811.jpeg)
What the fuck, coquettes are seriously ruining ballet. I knew it existed before, but it’s really hitting my studio big time this past year. They made some more classes for beginners and they got flooded with these women wearing the bows and fetishy outfits and they kept letting more join even though the classes were over filled and now they have started letting them into the intermediate classes as well. They never take it seriously either. And the studios just lean into it posting bait online and advertising with muh healing the inner child bullshit
No. 1872410
>>1872391it's the best place to go if you ever forget men are trash
I think it's really telling of gender differences seeing 99.99999999% of the posts are requests of females being degraded
Idk. How coem women never pull this shit
No. 1872414
>>1869712>>1869690Late reply but thanks nonas. Yeah at the moment I think I just find some random inane thing I buy and get obsessed with in my free time for two weeks or so and then it's back to zero. Late but Switch and Animal Crossing is my most recent. I think I'll join a sports club. I need something more substantial. I kinda wanna try kickboxing.
Congrats on nursing. That's an awesome profession. You actually make a difference with people. I really don't.
No. 1872419
File: 1706656404966.png (116.89 KB, 1144x1284, 1645335933113.png)
PLEASE ADMIN AM DYING RELEASE ME FROM THIS PRISON I NEED TO DUMBASS SHITPOST IS THIS NOT MY RIGHT AS A WOMAN AND AN AMERICAN? CELEBRICOWS IS ALLOWED TO FLOURISH WHILST I WITHER AWAY.
No. 1872425
File: 1706656804947.jpg (172.46 KB, 809x865, 1706578530582390.jpg)
>>1872419>>1872423I'm suffering too. What doesn't kill us will make our shitposting stronger
No. 1872428
>>1872425Shit becomes manure, manure feeds the grass, the grass feeds the cows
They are breaking the circle of life
No. 1872483
>>1872372I had this one friend I swore was bi when I met her and thought about dating her but turns out she was straight and a little bi curious
I was sad but she was so sweet it never bothered me
No. 1872507
File: 1706662575214.jpg (45.55 KB, 500x500, artworks-yybfqKeAj5cElFrR-hc6D…)
>Have a bladder condition.
>Have a doctor's note and approval to WFH from HR.
>Boss doesn't know the details but he knows I'm approved.
>Big client is coming in today.
>Boss says he wants me in there to meet with them. Will look great during promotion time in a month.
>Spend 50 mins driving up while feeling like I'm about to explode the whole way.
>Boss mentions I look grand.
>Running in and out of the bathroom every 20 mins.
>Client reschedules 30 mins beforehand.
>Boss says client may be coming in tomorrow. Come on in anyway just in case.
Fuck this job, fuck him, fuck my bladder.
No. 1872515
File: 1706663233987.jpg (23.86 KB, 408x612, istockphoto-105770365-612x612.…)
I feel so, so low about myself right now. I spent several years not looking at my reflection much or over-analyzing the way I come across (due to getting severely depressed over it in high school) and now that I have a professional job I have been trying, I thought successfully, to look put-together and normal. Not aiming to look pretty, because with the face I have I will never even be average, but at least professional and put-together. I finally realized today that I do not look professional or put-together at all and in fact look goofy and retarded. I had been having a gnawing feeling something was off about how I looked, but I ignored it until I finally snapped and took a good hard look at myself in a long mirror today. Then set up my phone camera on a shelf to record what I actually look like when I'm walking around. It has gutted me.
>hair lays oddly and childishly on my weirdly shaped skull even though I started using hair products and assumed it was looking okay
>my walking posture looks like that chad vs incel meme, me being the incel. I had no idea I walk like such a retard. Part of it developed from the mild ankle disability I have which makes my gait slightly "off," the best way to describe it is like an awkward middle schooler who doesn't know how to carry herself yet
>I can't figure out how to wear tucked-in button down shirts, apparently. They always look weird on me no matter what I try. I think it's because my legs are so short that tucking them into my pants shows how long my torso is and how short my legs are and makes me look like a middle aged farmer midget
>my outfits, which I was previously proud of, in actuality look frumpy due to all of my slacks looking baggy. I have to buy larger sizes to accommodate my thighs/butt and then use a belt to cinch it at my waist, which makes it fit bunchy and saggy everywhere
>of course I knew this already, but holy fuck my face is ugly. It's being even more exaggerated by my flat hair displaying my pinheaded skull
Overall my impression comes off as a stunted middle schooler and not the professional 24 year old woman I thought I was projecting. I am so devastated. Because I don't know how to fix any of these things:
>My hair is flat now because i am irreversibly balding
>I walk like a retard because of my fucked up ankles, and also I can't figure out how to correct my back posture since when I try it feels like I'm staring at the sky and I don't know if i'm over-correcting
>I can't buy smaller sizes of pants that fit the rest of my legs and my waist because my thighs and butt are too big
>facial ugliness is incurable
For years now I have had a mental image in my head of how I thought I looked and came across to other people, and now I know that version of me doesn't exist in reality. Every time I thought I looked cool or professional I actually looked like a 12 year old in awkward formal wear at a science fair. I want to crawl in a hole and never come out again. I can't figure out how i'm going to be able to go into work tomorrow.
No. 1872534
File: 1706665025543.jpg (42.89 KB, 622x680, 1000008817.jpg)
I always have these feelings that make me want to quit doing anything related to art. I don't even publish the things I do because I know they're uncultured autistic as fuck trash that nobody gives a fuck about. But whenever I talk to a friend of mine I feel like absolute shit, because she's actually good at art, and she loves criticizing art, and she wants me to git good and read shit and learn but I'm a fucking retard.
Anything I read, watch or listen goes through some sort of filter in my brain that makes me unable to comprehend it the way she wants me to comprehend it, I suck at learning shit, I suck at memorizing shit, I'm not the autistic savant who has photographic memory and learns the schedules of planes and trains, I'm the retarded autist that can't watch anything that's not what scratches her brain or she will feel like throwing up or like she's about to suffer from a heart attack.
You know what sucks? Feeling and actually seeing your heart beating like it's going to burst out of your chest because you're anxious about watching something on Netflix, or because you have to text someone or go outside.
I can't even do what I enjoy, how the fuck can I get a job? Whenever I speak it's like I'm talking in fuckin Latin with a thick hick accent and slang that's only used in some obscure town with 3 houses and 4 people living in there.
I wish I was dead, I wish I was at least braindead so I didn't have ideas at all and so I could shut the fuck up and stop telling people about them.
I hate liking arts and crafts, I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it so so so so so much, it's miserable, I don't even want to be good, but I want to feel like I'm at least putting somewhere all of the same 15 thoughts that circle my mind every second to the point thay I should call them intrusive thoughts.
I want to die.
No. 1872569
I hate how even though I've done so much work to overcome my mental problems, my body still feels things before my brain understands why. Like, I'll feel this horrible full-body dread and wonder why? And it'll take me a minute to rifle through recent events to figure out what caused it. It makes me feel weird and retarded. And it normally feels like my body is betraying me because I'm trying so hard to convince my brain to calm the fuck down, but my body won't listen. I used to have these horrible panic attacks and all sorts of mental malaise. I tried all sorts of things, CBT, DBT, EMDR, SSRIs, benzos, antipsychotics, ashwaganda, mindfulness, exercise, you name it, I probably tried it. I quit all my meds and stopped going to therapy because I felt like all of it was making me even worse, making me feel even more broken. I think I'm mostly more normal now, but I still have this problem where my body is constantly overreacting. I can feel my heart race so I know I'm anxious about something, but I don't even know what. Then, when I realize what it is, it's normally something really mundane that I can't control and have already taken steps to fix (like waiting for customer service to get back to me on something). It makes me want to smoke weed even though I stopped smoking a year ago because I can't do anything in moderation. I keep trying to convince my brain and body to work together as one, but when they do, I just cry and freak out all day over little things and am convinced it's the end of the world. Now I know it's not the end of the world, but my body doesn't get the memo. It's so frustrating, I don't know how to fix it and I don't know if I'll ever be normal. How can I hold down a job like this? I always felt like I was waiting for the other shoe to drop at my last job, and when it did, I just fell apart. I don't know. I hope things get better. Maybe I have an unrealistic expectation of what "recovery" will look like.
No. 1872581
File: 1706670216707.jpeg (17.03 KB, 360x360, GAM-1NJXsAA3_-R.jpeg)
>very tall, slightly stupid Leo man with three sisters who likes to fix shit around the house but also sews clothes and cooks and worships the ground I walk on
yeaaah now that I finally got one I think I might have a type. This is my first relationship and I think I did really well for the first time. But I had to encounter many shitty scrotes in my life, not just those interested in me but in general, before meeting one that's actually decent. Also the scrotes in my family are so shitty I don't even want my nigel to meet them
No. 1872589
>>1872225that sounds neat
nonnie. just ignore the tra's if they start harassing you.
No. 1872615
File: 1706674374056.png (372.78 KB, 640x480, JjJhVfZ.png)
It's so annoying my brain won't accept the changes to my body. I've gone down 8 dress sizes but still bookmarking threads for clothing advice or shops that cater to larger women and it's been years, I need to get with the goddamn program. Already bought clothing way too large to fit into because I didn't trust my tape measurements? Total madness.
No. 1872703
File: 1706687908749.jpeg (201.77 KB, 1080x1097, IMG_6818.jpeg)
i hate being depressed, it's the lamest cringiest mental illness. i don't even really believe that depression is a mental illness or even that most mental illnesses are actual 'illnesses' but are instead reactions to hardship and trauma, but i have no other explanation for seriously wanting to kill myself since i was a child for no good reason.
my heart just hurts all the time. i feel too much. and i don't want to go on antidepressants again, i tried most of them and it was a miserable time, plus whatever that sopranos guy said - "no chemical solution to a spiritual problem" or whatever.
i don't want to give up. i think i'm gonna try to get into stoicism and praying. maybe start doing mushrooms.
No. 1872745
>>1872743Nonna, other people can't save you and that pain going away was just you fooling yourself (look how low you are now)
Realize you're the only person who can save yourself ; it's very sad and hard to accept but it's the truth and the truth is liberating
No. 1872788
File: 1706699556334.jpeg (37.19 KB, 277x277, IMG_7511.jpeg)
>>1872786Ntayrt but “ don't think just do one tiny thing” is actually really good advice, I think I needed that too thanks nona.
No. 1872797
File: 1706700340181.jpeg (686.75 KB, 750x862, IMG_6508.jpeg)
women can’t have anything, because wtf. I don’t want to see a closeup of some scrotes facial hair wtf
No. 1872813
File: 1706702420641.png (76.35 KB, 978x525, Bethany Hamilton.png)
>>1872799What’s more upsetting is that he was hired to replace Bethany Hamilton who has publicly voiced her opposition to transgender men competing in women’s sports.
No. 1872826
File: 1706705229381.jpeg (37.09 KB, 744x412, IMG_6199.jpeg)
>>1872813That’s how they totally shot themselves in the foot. Bethany Hamilton is a legend of the sport , never mind being an actual woman. Rip Curl pile driving their own company has united bogan scrotes and rad fems alike as well as peaking normies across the country and probably the world kek
No. 1872835
File: 1706707741198.jpg (27.33 KB, 236x353, 2a1676092e77f7b882150a62d19d80…)
>>1872826Jesus Christ. He looks like his face should be embedded in a talking tree from a fairy tale. If I answered his riddles incorrectly he could banish me to the forbidden realm.
No. 1872839
File: 1706707934069.jpg (59.25 KB, 450x600, 5a72a3702d589b9b3806de5a726379…)
It's so hard to wear cute clothes when you have a matronly body.
No. 1872905
File: 1706714372507.gif (1.49 MB, 320x240, 1000016908.gif)
been feeling like a sad blob lately. idk what's up with me, more off days than on. spiraling. ugh.
No. 1872982
File: 1706719092502.jpg (36.87 KB, 640x530, bqur5x3ynqc21.jpg)
I am 99% sure I have androgenetic alopecia and reading more about hair loss science is making me seethe at bald men. So much of hair loss studies is centered around men and male pattern hairloss is more widely understood than female pattern hairloss is. And the mechanisms of the drugs used to treat MPHL is more studied on male subjects than female ones. It's not surprising you can see so many successful stories in male hairloss subreddits because they tend to be better responders to the drugs used to treat hairloss. Men can absolutely beat their genetic hairloss just for being proactive in seeking treatment and taking care of themselves. If you are a man, there is literally ZERO excuse to be a balding faggot. Meanwhile, browsing female hairloss subreddits is making me depressed because it seems only 50% of the posters there report to being successful responders to treatments. And even if they do see growth it is very gradual and slow. That's not even mentioning the side effects of the drugs used to treat FPHL. The more commonly prescribed drug is an anti androgen and messes up my periods and makes me pee every 5 min. And good fucking luck trying to find a practicioner who is willing to prescribe alternatives like finaateride because "think about your future babies!!!1". Seems like MPHL is a wild beast but the upside is that improvements tend to be very dramatic. FPHL is more gradual and prolonged and probably even more depressing when you're witnessing the slow death of your hair.
No. 1872988
>>1872982I’m in your same boat and it’s very upsetting. I’m a non-responder to all treatments and I will be bald by 30. One thing though:
>good fucking luck trying to find a practicioner who is willing to prescribe alternatives like finaateride because "think about your future babies!!!1"That’s the most commonly cited reason, but the bigger concern IMO is that it is highly suspected that it increases your chance of reproductive cancer. That’s why I haven’t pursued it.
No. 1873000
>>1872988I'm sorry to hear that anon. I'm still early in my treatments but if it turns out I'm not a responder it is going to be so ogre…
Have you looked into topical treatments of finaateride?
No. 1873031
>>1872900Most of my ideas involve possibly a fair bit of money so I apologise if you can't afford these…
You might be able to find a peer support group/other resources for bald(ing) women. Usually people who are going or already have gone through a thing have a vast knowledge of the subject or at least they can point you towards someone else who knows better. Alternatively or in combination, would it be possible to go to a professional hair stylist/hairdresser with the aim of finding a haircut that looks flattering on you and is easy to style and maintain? A good hairdresser should be able to find a haircut that fits your skull shape, face and the quality of your hair. Or you could do research on wigs.
In the similar vein I would look into a professional who could help you with your posture since as you pointed out it might be really hard to do on your own. I've personally found tremendous help in osteopathy, my osteopath has helped me with a variety of issues but also been fair enough to tell me if there is something she can't do or if someone else is able to do the same, e.g. sometimes it might be a better option to have a massage instead.
Clothing: I think there are general fashion threads either here or in /g/ you could try out, otherwise maybe YouTube or just general googling? And yes, there is also an option that costs money: professional stylist if there are any nearby you, I'm sure you could also find one that does online coaching. Is it obligatory to wear your shirt tucked in? Could you wear a vest or jacket on top of it to try and make your body proportions look different?
Taking in a seam for better fitting clothes is not that difficult, and if sewing feels too intimidating you definitely can find hacks and tricks for the waistline at least. And, obviously the more expensive option, take your clothes to a tailor.
I have never managed to cure my own stutter, instead I developed an attitude that it doesn't matter to me and if it bothers someone else it's their problem, not mine. Granted, I don't have too severe stutter but it's clearly noticeable when I talk, and I too talk a lot and loudly. It's just one of those things I finally decided I don't give a shit about.
Lastly I'd just like to say that even though many of these things can be fixed one way or another, don't be too hard on yourself. I understand it might feel crushing, especially if you feel like there's too many things "wrong" with you and if your whole self image has come crashing down at once. You're 24, you're still a work in progress so to say. It's also very likely you're looking at yourself very harshly, and it's entirely possible other people haven't paid any attention in those things and see you in a different light than you see yourself. You could try finding something that you do like in your appearance and enhance it. Or wear something you like, maybe your favourite colour or a nice piece of jewelry you like so that you'll always have something you can look at and go "yes, that looks or feels nice" when everything else feels horrible. Best of luck to you nona, I'd add a heart here but I'm sure it'll lead to a ban kek.
No. 1873040
>>1873031thank you for responding anon. I’ve considered a lot of what you recommend but I’m always so scared to spend any money that I just try to fix things by myself and fail. The hair cut thing in particular makes me nervous because I have only ever had terrible experiences with trying to get my hair cut
>costs an arm and a leg>they decide to do something random to your hair despite describing what you want in detail with pictures>commenting on my balding and suggesting nonsense remedies>have to go all the fucking time because I have a very short hair cut that grows out in like 2.5 weeks so the spending would be insaneI currently cut it myself but I hate it and I’m clearly not good at it.
I’m also so retarded that I know I wouldn’t be able to alter my pants myself without ruining them. But I think this is one thing that I should just bite the bullet and spend money on, I just have to work up the courage.
My stutter is actually a recent development in my life so I guess I’m not as seasoned about tolerating it yet. I guess because I miss how I used to sound. I try to not care, but when people start looking at me weird when I get stuck it makes me panic and want to die. I will keep trying to reach your level of confidence, but it’s so hard.
Again, thank you for your suggestions. And just so you know, this heart specifically is allowed here ♥
No. 1873242
>>1873159I was late into my 20s when my parents started actually discussing their health with me, I wish they’d done it sooner because I ended up with a similar medical issue as my mom and if I’d known sooner doctors might have taken my concerns seriously when I first started having symptoms.
So if you think that’d get more straight answers that’s where you can start, “mom, dad we need to discuss family medical history so I know what to expect or keep an eye out for”.
No. 1873294
>>1873285on the topic of that though I do hate satanic panic fearmongering alt right or right leaning people who only care about women and children for brownie points and then whenever a right wing figure is accused of doing the same shit they point fingers at hollywood liberals doing they turn a blind eye. personally when it comes to abuse of power I'm just super apolitical and understand that power corrupts a lot of folks no matter how they identify, and many many celebrities or politicians will switch stances or sides in order to appeal to whatever is popular or profitable (see Russell Brand) showing that they have no allegiance to the values they preach anyway.
hollywood does have a lot of abuse but the accusation that everything is satanic symbolism and child sacrifice while ignoring the reality of the abuse inflicted on child actors, teenagers and young women in particular is grotesque to me. this kind of behavior is especially perpetuated by 4chan incel moids who hate women themselves and don't want to acknowledge the truth. no one should care about fucking triangle esoteric symbolism bullshit or that ranting retard isaac kappy or dojas edgelord imagery, meanwhile ignoring the giant pink elephant in the room
No. 1873315
File: 1706737347441.jpg (43.56 KB, 500x500, 1000016987.jpg)
I think I'm burning out on my current fixation, or else it's depression making me lose interest in everything, I feel like I need to have a really big cry I feel on edge, and also my laptop stopped working and there were some files I didn't back up. I really need a hug I think I'm going to die from lack of touch.
No. 1873365
I'm so done with hellweek, I just want to be a loser in the dumbass shit thread again.
>>1873341I know it sounds impossible but be useless and depressed. It sucks but drinking will likely make you feel worse from the comedown, you'll get through it. I believe in you
nonnie ♥
No. 1873371
>>1873331You get reminded the second you see the thumbnails and read the titles kek. When I gave it a try a few months ago I searched for
amateur love sorted by newest and the very first results were underage looking girls in creepy circumstances and degrading titles. It's all cancer and yes all men are trash.
No. 1873409
>>1873401I recently did an interview and for the HR culture bit I mentioned that I was active in the tennis and running committee in my last company. Don't be afraid to lie but don't mention you were the head. They can't check that stuff but head sounds a bit too good. Also the usual stuff about wanting to learn more, expand your skills blah blah.
If it's going bad mention you're a part of a women's support group called ColLow, lol
No. 1873487
>>1873481You're upset now because you made a bond with him. You legit saw a future with him and was ready. In a few months you'll remember all the shitty things he did to you. You're lonely and scared. But remember, he's replacable.
You'll find someone of better quality. But focus on healing. Cry under the blankets and mourn the relationship.
Then wake up and remember, there was nothing to mourn in the first place because your partner was too immature and horny. Find yourself a man, not a boy.
No. 1873507
>>1873430No kek he makes
bad music and had a few songs go viral
No. 1873550
File: 1706756147703.jpg (200.75 KB, 853x1280, 1385-12452975239HTu-2093090084…)
i don't know what to do. i am scared everyday. my family won't admit that i was raped by a pedophile and that other predators used this against us. all my family is all kinds of insane. lies, sadism, narcissism. why did i have to move into their city? why does their familiar bullshit feel comfortable to me? they always gaslight me. when i acted out they shamed and abandoned me. i was a child and they acted like i wanted to be addicted. i was alone and the fucking pedophile drugged me. i had no choice. then my parents kept me on drugs just so i would not die from withdrawals, and coincidentally every time i had finals come up, they would give me a larger dose, making me forget what i had learned and dissociate during the tests. then they fucking tell me that it is my choice to be stupid and my fault for failing, because look at my sibling, he is doing so much better! this is insanity and being near them makes me want to die. i have constant anxiety and sleep problems.
No. 1873628
>>1873608I know how you feel
nonnie. My cat was 12 years old when he got really sick, he was my little cuddle bug, he was my support when I was in hs and college. I would give anything to have him back again.
No. 1873781
File: 1706782122694.jpg (21.19 KB, 274x275, 1000004778.jpg)
does anyone else feel like you can hardly tell anyone anything now? is this because of modern day social media narcissism or because i'm 25 and most people i talk to are 25-35? am i too sensitive? i swear it wasn't always like this, i used to talk to high school friends about whatever and it never felt so judgemental. recent examples of things that keep happening to me for a few years now:
>talking to online friend in a group that i feed my dog type x and am told omg omg dogs shouldn't be fed type x they need type y it's ~better~. i changed the subject because i'm just trying to chill playing a game after 7 hours of classes and i don't want to argue about fucking dog food.
>brother is a gymbro miserable health nut type and i literally cannot talk to him about anything health related because he will explain basic biology to me when he knows i am about to graduate with a bio degree, or he spergs on and ON about health shit that i frankly do not give a shit about and he comes off preachy and condescending. he does the same thing to our parents. fwiw i am very thin so it's not like i am a fatty asking him for advice. he also only bitches to others about their bad habits he DOESNT also have. he doesn't think for himself and is obsessed with sucking Jocko Willink's dick and lets other random men online dictate how he should live his life then he tries to "inspire others" by being an asshole.
>cannot post about anything skincare related that isn't splashing water on your face here otherwise some farmers accuse you of being a pickme who must be scared of aging, cannot talk about makeup without some farmers accusing you of likely looking like a potato caked in bronzer who is obviously only trying to look appealing to moids.
>bfs mom notices my daith piercing and acts utterly disgusted and begs me to not get a facial piercing or a tongue piercing which i have never even considered. felt patronizing as hell
>another online friend constantly trying to 1 up me, humble brag about shit i don't think matters, overexplain shit i already demonstrated some knowledge on, say my tastes basically suck and basically imply i am a dumb zoomer, weirdly enough imply i am stupid and poor for living where i do.
the only thing i can see in common is these are adults i know are miserable because my nigel never has done any of these types of things to me even once and he's a decently accomplished, content adult. is anyone else feeling like they barely have anyone they can actually talk about whatever with because most people are so controlling and constantly giving you advice when you never asked for any nor complained about anything in the first place? i hardly talk to anyone or ever really complain about personal shit but certain types of people will find a way to keep yapping to make themselves feel oh so smart or whatever it is they get out of it? people wonder why i don't make contact much or tell them much about myself but it's because i get bombarded with their bullshit! i can't even talk about small things like dog food or my opinion or tastes in something without some douche going off about nothing. i am already vague with people often and still feel like there's so many topics i can't touch lest i suffer a ten minute lecture on why x sucks and anyone who likes it is stupid. oh well at least i have my nigel and one online friend who is actually chill when we openly disagree on shit and we move on or at most have a short civil discussion over it where no one is attacking anyone.
No. 1873786
>>1873781Yes and it's worse in younger age groups. College at the moment is a nightmare, no thanks to a lot of younger entitlement, backstabbing and seeing everyone around them as direct competition and amplifying their insecurity. People get so aggressive with proselytizing lately, I think partly due to social media letting them talk into the void with authority, or because they aren't being taken seriously at home for one reason or another. I cut off a handful of other students lately because of all their shitty drama and a rampant inability to keep things private and non-judgmental. This shit wasn't an issue with the same age group a decade ago, I swear. It's not an issue among people older or my own age. You'd get an asshole or two like the people you've described, but it wouldn't always be seemingly everyone in environments where it doesn't make sense.
Personal insecurity is one hell of a drug.
No. 1873854
File: 1706786715815.jpg (12.73 KB, 320x320, 088548e4240b850376f03258258f2e…)
If I see another person recommend SHITaki noodles to people on diets, I'm gonna go crazy
No. 1873925
File: 1706792686604.jpg (62.47 KB, 799x641, 8a64ed6fcba44cdf71d24d75ad22c6…)
For the first time ever I was having a dream about the only 3D celebrity moid I've found attractive in a decade just for my alarm to go off 15 seconds after he appeared and we started talking, why is life so cruel nonnies
No. 1874045
>>1874019I know this will sound cliché but devoting some time each day to stretching (find some videos you like on YT) really helped me. Exercise did too, but idk if you have time/energy for that. The directed stretching/yoga kind of made "relaxing" into a definable goal for that short time. I noticed I was far less sore when I would do this for at least 20m a day.
I got out of a horrific relationship recently and suffered the loss of my pet. Both were pretty traumatic and for the time before my pet died, I was barely sleeping at all. I'm still recovering from it and trying to control adrenaline spikes/depression. I'm so sorry that you are going through this but it has to get better for us now that we are free. I'm rooting for you.
No. 1874051
>>1874028>You’ll be ok, we all learn from our mistakes and by golly your family being potential dicks about it will surely cement the lesson for you.Yeah you're right… thank you
nonnieThough even if they weren't dickheads, I'd still be annoyed. I just wanna be left alone but oh well, beggars can't be choosers
No. 1874075
File: 1706807771850.jpg (28.81 KB, 420x420, 1639256687609.jpg)
A very big reason of why I chose the profession I chose is because it's +98% female. So someone please tell me why three of my coworkers are male, with another one on the way. A) managed to show me porn on his phone accidentally within a month of knowing each other (latina asses), B) doesn't believe in locking doors and keeps changing with the door all open (tighty whities) and C) walked in on me changing even though it's a known rule no male enters the big break room before 9am and afterwards you always knock because you can't lock the door (didn't apologize, just said "Whoops" and turned on his heel). The whole lot of them are fucking perverts, I swear to god.
I wish I were an anaerobic amoeba, living off of no oxygen just to make sure I get rid of the very last XY in my life, reeeeee.
No. 1874090
>>1874045I love you nona, thank you for the advice…
Right now I'm very frustrated about it because I could just "cut him off" and magically be cured but then all of these joint pains hit me and since there's no organic cause it's stress…fuck off, I wish moids could go through this instead of bitching and crying.
No. 1874108
File: 1706810999392.jpg (Spoiler Image,2.06 MB, 4000x3000, fuckedup.jpg)
I went to a hairdresser to get my hair dyed purple and she completely fried it kek. As soon as she lifted the foil actual steam came off and I wanted to kill myself in front of her.
Spoilering for disaster, but at least some nonna can laugh at my disgrace.
No. 1874152
File: 1706813633586.jpeg (49.47 KB, 800x588, 83331522-EE71-421E-93E4-43C20A…)
Something really upsetting happened 4 months ago that made me the most distraught I’ve ever been in my life. Initially I had to take a day off work to process it and was suicidal and nearly non-functional for a couple of weeks. I feel like I should be over it by now, but even 4 months later I’m just not. I tried to talk to my mom about it at the beginning, but she doesn’t understand why it hurt me so deeply and so she doesn’t really like to hear about it anymore. My only friend (online-only) ghosted me for unknown reasons a couple months before the incident, so I can’t even talk to her. But I have so many thoughts about it stuck inside my heart and mind with no where to go.
I tried extremely hard to find a therapist when it first happened, and I finally found one, but she was totally useless. My insurance doesn’t cover therapy at all so I’d be looking at $200 per session (where I live) to see anybody, and so many of them are just crap. I’m starting to worry that I’ll never get over this and that it will weigh on my heart permanently. I am so miserable after it happened, it’s like all the light in my world disappeared and I have just been living in “animal mode” (only eating, sleeping, and working) since then to cope and get through the days. I don’t know how to deal with this and I am so exhausted from the constant grief. Even just writing this post has made me cry. I wish I could enter a timeline where it never happened and I could still be passionate and happy like I used to be. It still sometimes feels like a nightmare that I could wake up from.
No. 1874166
File: 1706814367312.jpg (13.42 KB, 320x488, despair.jpg)
feeling lots of despair regarding what little documents we have of lesbianism in antiquity. this is genuinely making me so upset right now. no i don't want to read something made by a pervert moid from the 19th century or whatever damn it. then you compare it to records of male homosexuality but then again so much of that is degenerate pederasty as well… i know it's because of misogyny and that women weren't really "people" up until recently (which is so horrifyingly bleak) so nobody felt the need to document that but i just wish there was more… it makes me so sad that we've been neglected to erasure basically.
No. 1874176
>>1874075what job is that?
god men are disgusting
No. 1874183
File: 1706815691592.jpeg (113.27 KB, 736x988, 54A66FC1-DEE8-403D-AF44-6DB147…)
i miss her so much dumbass shit…i started rereading the bunker and weekend threads, take me back pls.
No. 1874207
File: 1706817943295.jpg (30.8 KB, 750x399, 152387086.jpg)
>>1874183same. i was actually fine without it for a while but now I'm starting to get thread withdrawals. i'm almost willing to take a ban for a single shitpost.
No. 1874231
>>1874200>>1874215I really appreciate your kindness of being willing to lend an ear. Just the offer brings me some comfort, thank you anons.
But part of my problem is that what happened (and how I reacted to it) is really embarrassing and complicated with a lot of backstory, to the point that I can’t really bring myself to share it with anyone other than a therapist. Because to 99.99% of people, it makes no sense why I am so affected by this, because while objectively sad and disappointing, it is still sort of “trivial” in a sense and shouldn’t be as soul-crushing as it has been for me. Really, it’s because I had embedded a lot of trust, dreams and hopes in something that might seem surface-level or silly to others, so when everything abruptly and unexpectedly shattered, the shrapnel deeply wounded and may have even destroyed my hopes, dreams, love, and trust in others. So, basically everything that makes life worth living.
I know that no one can really give me a good solution when I am so vague about what happened, so I apologize. I’m really just venting because I have to hide all my sadness in real life.
No. 1874235
File: 1706821271092.jpg (451.35 KB, 1500x1664, 813UILsDR-L.jpg)
>>1874108I'm sorry nona I looked at the picture before reading your post and I thought it was like the plastic straw that comes in easter baskets KEK
get the strongest hair mask you can find and you'll be okay
No. 1874236
File: 1706821329696.jpeg (677.33 KB, 1179x1084, 1702508340568.jpeg)
Why won't anyone give me any validation ever? DO I HAVE TO FUCKING ASK FOR IT? IS IT JUST SO HARD TO SAY "GOOD JOB, ANON", "I LOVE YOU, ANON" ONCE IN A WHILE?? Goddamn
No. 1874275
>>1874231Its ok
nonnie i understand, i wouldnt judge as everyone has their own sense of importance and i would only be attacking myself as well if i did. Hope everything turns well for you i wish you the best
No. 1874299
>>1874291fish is so healthy for you and the bebe though, why is it abolished during pregnancy? Whenever I google about it I always get conflicting results saying that it is safe for its nutrient profile, and others saying that it is
not safe because of the same reason?
No. 1874319
>>1874090Moids are barely human. Let me tell you a story that made me rage. I recently went to my dermatologist/aesthetician. She's an incredible older woman, beautiful, fit, classy. Like the aunt you wish you had. She cancelled all my appointments for 3 months, stating she'd had an accident. No problem, I waited. Turns out she fell down the stairs and her boyfriend took her to the hospital. She had a skull fracture and bleeding into her brain. WTF. She was in the hospital for 2 months. Her moid flew back to another (close) country and didn't visit her for those 2 months, saying she had enough friends to take care of her.
I swear to God I was filled with rage when she told me this (after I mentioned my ex was a cheating lying bastard). Like I can't imagine anyone doing that to such a beautiful and talented woman. I stumbled all over my words like a fucking retard but I just told her, "I can't even find words. You're everything I'd like to be when I'm older, even if it takes me longer because I had a slower start. I can't imagine some worthless man doing that to you." And we commiserated. I've been seeing her for a couple years and always shot the shit about little life things, so this was a huge leap into more personal stuff. But my god moids are the absolute worst. Never again.
Now I think of her and realize, if she can come back to work, looking fantastic, with confidence and intelligence… after that… I'm gonna at least try.
But if we struggle more, it's OK, everyone is on their own path. She's also an established professional, and I bet that helps a lot.
No. 1874325
>>1874019Can you afford professional help?
Therapy through art, dance, physical therapy, balneotherapy might help with these kinds of psychiatric-neurological defects
No. 1874326
>>1874319How do you even build a family in 2k24 when moids are this trash?
You can't even have someone look after you when you're ill?
I'm terrified of my parents dying because I don't know if I'll be able to ever find someone to call "family" in this horrible world
No. 1874330
>>1874326ayrt my ex was the second moid I've been with seriously and that's going to be the end of moids for me (I used to think I was bi, now who knows). He fought with me in the hospital after I had emergency surgery (about cleaning our apartment before I would be coming home in 2 weeks). He started looking for someone on Tinder after I had a second follow-up surgery. This was someone I had trusted. With graduate degrees. I had/have an up-and-coming career. I'd sacrificed a lot to try to keep him happy but moids will bleed you dry and cheat on you with any woman who is willing. It's insane.
Every woman in this thread needs to start building or keep nurturing female friendships. I'm a bit awkward and I withdrew from everyone after one of my parents died traumatically. After hearing this story, I realized I need to figure out how to create a strong network of women around me, because men can't be trusted at all.
No. 1874335
>>1874330I was reading up this story about how a woman (married with kids) after she had total hip replacement surgery was being fed frozen food and bread by her husband who couldn't be bothered to cook something nourishing for her
Like… What the fuck??
I get the female friends thing but I think friends that are close enough to care for you when you're ill are very hard to find
I want a FAMILY
is the only way to have someone to take care of you to go lesbian? Is there any data on how lesbian couples take care of each other?
No. 1874385
>>1874342It was like that for me too. All I wanted to do was sleep. My dog knew I was sick and was super concerned. I had other symptoms as well but the fever, throat pain/cough, fatigue, and body pains were the worst.
It took about 3 weeks to get over it. I got sick at the end of 2022. After you get better, please be careful because I immediately got sick again after getting covid, and for awhile it felt like I would never be healthy again. I'm not normally someone who gets sick easily but my immune system was very poor for months afterward
No. 1874438
File: 1706833366916.jpeg (86.22 KB, 628x714, IMG_9568.jpeg)
i just turned 23 so i know how pathetic this is. but i am feeling so upset over my body and weight gain lately. ive been so mentally well and working out and doing ballet again and eating healthy but i fell back into binging a few months ago so the progress is slow…but i istumvled onto that ed twitter bullshit again from seeing some post and felt so ashamed that i was telling myself i need to puke up food again and starve to be pretty. i think its so enticing because it gives control, you feel like youve solved this cheat code. but i know its foolish. i know i should keep doing it the proper way, i just cant help but think how much less id have to worry if i just didnt eat much again and found ways around it. my boyfriend loves me so much so i cannot expressthis to him. he calls it retarded and he is correct. i just dont know what to do.
my cortisol is high from uni, im vegan so its been hard to cut out seed oils and so on. i just feel ashamed. im being so cruel to myself and wish to be even crueler by purging and starving just to feel like im worthy of loving myself? it gets old. dont know what to do. should stay off lolcow perhaps ive been scrolling too much here instead of being with myself snd my puppy.
No. 1874447
>>1874323holy fuck
nonnie i just volunteered with elementary students recently and didnt realize they were allowed to yell in their faces and grab their arms and pull them around wtf???
No. 1874468
>>1874299Because it's raw and if it's not handled properly it can get parasites and make you sick
>>1874317I don't want to risk it
No. 1874543
>>1874244aryt, yeah, it's so hard to be so distraught about something that seems silly to others. I have to pretend to not be sad because if my family sensed how sad I really am, they would look down on me because it seems pathetic to other people. It's actually kind of good that your situation is your own fault, as weird as that may seem. it means you have control over it and something to work on improving. I hope things start looking up for you soon. Conversely though, what happened on my end was totally out of my control. I couldn't have done anything to prevent it. Which just makes me feel at the mercy of fate and other people. Like there's nothing I can do to predict or prevent or fix this or anything in the future. Especially because I tried so hard to avoid outcomes like this after being scarred in my past from similar events, so I thought I was playing it super safe this time, and it still turned out this way, and actually even more horrific than ever in the past. I really feel powerless and resigned to never care about anything again, because every time i try, my heart gets destroyed and I just can't do it again. When your trust in others gets destroyed over and over, it feels impossible and even foolish to ever trust again.
No. 1874608
File: 1706840058756.jpg (97.67 KB, 720x720, 1000002480.jpg)
>>1867793Dripped out Ralph Lauren bear would
never say that.
No. 1874615
>>1874609Tbh there would be new cows if the farmhands and certain farmers here werent so autistic.
Whenever someone tries to bring in new cows here they get told off that "no one cares" and that they should go to other sites to discuss those cows and then jannyys and gossip farmers get confused on why there boards are close to inactive.
No. 1874617
File: 1706840451666.jpg (209.33 KB, 720x597, FB_IMG_14770054256647481[1].jp…)
I'm the nonny that recently confessed to the guy i liked for years, and i'm not sure how to feel about it.
I told him about my feelings for him for 7 years, and explained the abuse/harassment situation i was in to him that led to me ghosting him, i have no idea what i was expecting to happen after that or what reaction, but after he read what i said, we just kept on talking normally after that and i have no idea how to feel about that.
My close friend that helped me to make the decision to tell him about my feelings congratulated me for taking such big step and doing the right thing which was telling him the truth.
On the other hand, i know it's not supposed to make me feel better or anything, but even knowing i did the right thing, i still have the same bad feelings about everything that happened, i can't stop ruminating what happened and feeling i could die to just go back in time and stay with him back then.
I'm also sad that, the moment my bpd finally let go off my brain for a while, i got severely sick for two weeks and half and now that i'm finally feeling better physically, i can feel my bpd making it's way to rot my brain away again. I was only able to confess to him because i was feeling lucid after so many years, and now i can feel i'm losing myself in my head again.
Maybe my feelings about the entire situation is already under influence of my bpd, who knows.
I just wish i was a normal person with a normal wired brain and that i wouldn't ever let bpd ruin my life like it's been doing for so long.
I'm tired of crying thinking about him in the shower. I want to just go back to 2019 and do everything different. I'm disgusted with myself. I'm also sorry for always venting about this, it's really eating my heart out.
No. 1874620
>>1874605I’ve mostly done acrylic painting and oil painting but I’ve also heard it’s wasteful as they don’t biodegrade. I want to do something closer to sculpting (with the resin thing I was making my own molds so was having a blast) but that I could get extra income with (so unique pieces like clay would be a no-go). Actually, I’m looking up everything I’ve ever been interested in and most seem to be a no- no, may I ask what makes epoxy so special/terrible, artsy
nonnie?
No. 1874641
>>1874552happens to me as well. ambien does work for sleeping, it's the only thing that works
for staying awake, armodafinil
No. 1874656
>>1874629I could consider ceramics, though it doesn’t really click with me at the moment. But I can always give it a try!
This all actually got me into the rabbithole of resin pyramids and ashtrays drama, for what is worth I’m looking to make some extra pocket money on niche fandom spaces (not like making a store or anything), so if the concern is the mass producing of very generic stuff that would be thrown out… it probably wouldn’t (I hope haha) because fellow husbandofags typically keep their merch collection. They could still be throwing out their acrylic keychains & plastic yarns, too.
Still wouldn’t know what to do about the other concerns/if the resin yellowing is that bad that it does risk actually being thrown out? Ugh. I don’t know.
No. 1874679
File: 1706843920739.jpg (109.63 KB, 564x1249, a3db3fc01b22cd59b6b29146675027…)
Hate being straight so much but the only way I see me being happy is if I'm with an asperger moid with only ever so slightly a smidge of internet access to ensure he's not porn brained and he has wholesome hobbies like trains and shit. I live rurally so I frequently search for arthropods and mushrooms and it would be so romantic doing that with a boyfriend. I'm super socially inept so chances of me finding this is low, but I'm not settling. I WILL shape a moid into what I like.
No. 1874682
>>1874680>mercury causes brain development issues in pregnant motherssushi should be avoided 100 percent
Girl, it isn't pseudo science.
No. 1874698
File: 1706845478628.jpg (48.19 KB, 500x550, 1000012524.jpg)
>first meal of day
>pan fried salmon and bok choy with honey soy sauce glaze
>later
>mom made cookies, ate 5 thru day
>now
>baking a sweet potato, caramelizing a whole head of garlic w/ olive oil to stir into it in lieu of butter
I will never lose weight. So damn fat.
No. 1874713
File: 1706846484467.jpg (Spoiler Image,209.08 KB, 1200x799, someone tell the japanese fast…)
>>1874682Photo of me as a youngster. (My mother lived by an AYCE sushi restaurant when she was pregnant.)
No. 1874726
File: 1706847337938.gif (1.47 MB, 270x226, 4cf62d8c85cd1fa608e283111b3089…)
need my thread. need my thread. i need. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. thread. need my thread. my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. need my thread. I'm going to commit a bannable offense I swear to GOD. give me my fucking thread
No. 1874761
File: 1706851791465.jpeg (33.45 KB, 719x709, IMG_3710.jpeg)
I’m trying to buy less polyester clothing, and I get so annoyed that everytime I go shopping for some cute clothes, it’s always polyester.
No. 1874765
File: 1706852454534.jpeg (367.75 KB, 640x674, 832D01BD-3E58-4B89-BDD0-AF40D6…)
I used to do my makeup like this and I’m so embarasssed now.
No. 1874782
>>1874777I'm replying because no one was being vile or mean to her? Thats why I asked; who was being vile or mean to her? If homunculus
nonnie's post is upsetting for some reason I must not be able to understand why because it looks like a joke to me??
No. 1874838
>>1874689>bakery cupcakes>chocolate & peanut butterDelicious treats that please the senses.
>going down the street and waiting to enter a building on a bikeA journey that's yet to be completed.
>Christmas decorationsAnticipation for a big event.
Don't fret; these visions are all auspicious. If you really want to get to the root of them, you have to have some baked Christmas treats before attempting the deed, or train on a stationary bike for a bit beforehand.
No. 1874904
>>1874661Ayrt. It's still not recommended because it's one if the riskier things, and if you tell people it's ok to have a little seafood every once in a while, some people are gonna take it overboard. Like, it may be ok to drink a little alcohol or do a couple weeds/cigarettes while pregnant but doctors won't tell pregnant women that cause then you'll have women snorting coke and getting blackout drunk every week kek. Just a safety precaution, it's only 9 months and many mother agree it's better to be safe than sorry when it comes to things like parasites/mercury/bacteria, so I respect anons decision even if she probably could have a cooked sushi roll.
Anyway, sorry for contributing to the derailing. I feel bad that my post kicked up the discussion again
No. 1874968
File: 1706878071187.gif (1.4 MB, 300x224, rayjgrandma.gif)
I got my period and I'm suffering. I can't even seem to find the strenght and motivation to crawl out of bed to play baldur's gate. The shitposting thread and the dumbass shit are still under Hellweek prison law so I can't even do that.
No. 1875050
my mother has been dealing with some unexpected health issues and none of my so-called "friends" have reached out to me to offer support to me, even though they know i've been going through it and was really depressed/scared. like, there was a moment when my mom first went into hospital where i was sure that i was going to wake up to a nurse calling me in the middle of the night with terrible news. i wasn't sleeping because of it and i was pretty much on my phone all day texting and calling my mom, asking for updates in the middle of lectures, just because i would freak out whenever she would go silent for more than an hour thinking something terrible had happened.
thank god she's getting better, but it still sucks that these people couldn't even take two minutes out of their day to reach out to me and be there for me. perhaps i'm being selfish but, the most i ever got out of this one chick i know was, "oh wow, that sucks.". another one of my friends is all butthurt at me because i didn't wish her happy birthday…but her birthday was literally the same day my mom went into hospital. like wtf am i just supposed to drop my mom who is getting all this emergency treatment, just to tell you happy birthday? all of this literally just came out of the blue as well which added to the overall shittiness of it - my mother never has any sort of issues, so for me to find out she's in the er because of a blood clot was almost like getting slapped in the face.
the last time i spoke to her, my mom started crying on the phone thanking me for praying for her and being there for her. my mom never cries either; she's always so stoic, peaceful and composed so hearing her cry and tell me how much she loves me really broke my heart into a million pieces. i've never told my mom how much i love her as much as i have these past two weeks. things are getting better and i shouldn't be all that surprised about fairweather friends, but it still sucks knowing that people who are always up your ass will abandon you the moment shit gets real.
No. 1875057
>>1875031I feel the same way about shaving too. Like is it really your choice to spend thousands on shaving products, professional waxing that is often times painful, and blasting your body with lasers to remove hair? Is it? Too bad when you pose these questions they double down or say "Well I just prefer being completely hairless, it's for me." And you never stop to think why that is?
It's tiring trying to get people to wake up when they're aware they're following the status quo and stupid beauty standards but just frame it as a personal choice so they can participate in them without feeling guilty or having to think for themselves.
No. 1875073
>>1875057I just shaved off my bush. I like not shaving and the appearance of my pubic area unshaven, but I would get rashes from my pants that I don't get when I shave. These rashes are so painful they
are inhibiting me having sex, etc.
I went up a pant size and I still would get the rashes. So either way unfortunately the bush isn't meant for modern clothing. If someone really wants to keep the bush, trimming is an option. However, it's more difficult for me to trim back there with scussors rather than just shave it with an electric shaver.
For what it's worth, I don't shave my legs or pits.
No. 1875079
>>1875057>>1875067why does it even matter anyway if a woman wants to shave her body hair or not? posts like these are one of the reasons i've had to take a break from lolcow cause i get sick of the militant, one-track minded thinking that goes on here at times. i also shave my body hair, and just bought a $300 ipl machine to stop the growth on my legs and stomach…so what? you guys gonna burn me at the stake for doing so? i like the feeling of smooth skin, i don't itch and scratch myself like a mutha when i wear tight pants, and it helps with my body odor and general hygiene, especially around my genitals. having long, unmanageable pubic hair that holds onto sweat and urine odors is disgusting, regardless of how you look at it. i never really wanted to shave my pubes because i am not sexually active, but it got the point where i just couldn't deal with it anymore so it had to go.
i notice you guys always act like women are incapable of making their own decisions or that everything you don't personally agree with is somehow because of society or men, which ironically is just as irritating as society bitching about us not doing certain things…it's like you can never win as a woman because someone will inevitably find some way to put you down and say you're just another dumb dumb whose been brainwashed by big razor to not go outside with even a day's worth of stubble on your calves. if you prefer not to shave because you think it's more liberating, i think that's cool and genuinely admire you for doing so because i know how cruel people can be towards women who don't shave. but this is really low on the totem pole of sticking it to "the man" if you really think about it and it doesn't make you any more or less special than another girl who gets a full brazilian every month of her own volition.
No. 1875080
>>1875073What the fuck kind of clothes are you wearing where having a bush gives you rashes? Are you sure it's not the underwear? I've never heard of this before but at least if you have to shave it all off it's because of a health related issue.
>>1875079You're the exact type of libfem retard I was talking about in my original post. Wasting money to look hairless for the invisible man in your head telling you hairless = better is ridiculous. Having a bush doesn't make you smelly, but if that's what you have to tell yourself to get to sleep at night go for it kek.
No. 1875085
>>1875079> you're just another dumb dumb whose been brainwashed by big razor to not go outside with even a day's worth of stubble on your calves.you are. you live under patriarchy. use your brain and question why men never shave. why don’t men say things like “uwu! i love the feel of my smooth silky legs~!” why is there only societal pressure around people of your sex shaving, why do i get stared at in public whenever i go out in shorts but you don’t. and men don’t either despite having WAY more hair on their legs than i do?
> but this is really low on the totem pole of sticking it to "the man" if you really think about itdamn and 99% of women can’t even do this or see the purpose behind it without a lot of crying and whining. the female sex is cucked and fucked, we are never getting out
No. 1875095
>>1875080I don't wear underwear because underwear would always leave rashes. I wear nicer yoga pants, jeans, etc. (nothing from Amazon/temu/shein/etc ). I would apply lotion because it's dry out here, but it doesnt seem to really fix the issue. If anyone knows how to deal with this issue, please let me know because I did enjoy having a bush.
I disagree that it makes you smell, you just need to shower regularly and wipe correctly and it smells fine/good (to me anyway). To be fair, I am on birth control so I don't get periods. I can see why periods would complicate the hygiene down there, but trimming would work.
No. 1875104
File: 1706888094419.jpeg (43.48 KB, 1024x1024, IMG_9946.jpeg)
i hate being sensitive so much. i grew up in really strict household, basically if i did small mistake i would get scolded for minutes or get physical punishment. sadly this followed me for years. i try not to cry when someone raises a voice at me or when someone strictly criticises me for something. its so exhausting. sometimes i don’t even know how to react anymore - i just show a small smile and then they question if im crazy. at this point i don’t know anymore. i don’t know why people has to be so fucking mean. i try to say to myself those words “they are just fucking people, ignore them they aren’t important” i wish it would work lol
No. 1875108
>>1875100unm its something that people do just because it makes them happy
nonnie and no other reason! they havent been influenced by anyone at all. and once again it makes them
happy so criticizing it in any way is bad~
No. 1875110
File: 1706888387111.jpeg (607.78 KB, 1170x778, IMG_4329.jpeg)
Why are some anons so triggered by the thought of another anon wanting to shave her armpits?
No. 1875116
>>1875107> Although trooning out is a whole other beastThat’s what I mean. That anon was being dramatic. Compare it to like you said, wanting to wear makeup or not. Don’t bring scrotes into it
>>1875112Thank you for your very theoretical input kek
No. 1875181
File: 1706892635036.gif (490.84 KB, 500x396, normal-laughter.gif)
The last two or three weeks I've been getting a sudden whiff of a god awful smell. It's like moldy bread and shit. It lasts like 2-10 seconds then goes away. I've been showering twice a day, brushing my teeth three times, changing my sheets every night but it keeps popping up randomly. I asked my sister and she said I smell fine. I'm insanely paranoid that I just fucking stink all the time and no one wants to say anything and because I'm around me I'm smellblind to myself. I'm honestly starting to crack up. God I hope I'm just going crazy and having phantom smells.
No. 1875183
File: 1706892660137.jpeg (65.58 KB, 640x599, 90C78069-B57E-48BD-B4D2-E9FC5D…)
I can’t stop thinking of him. My ex used to say “you’re such a whore” tbqh I was, cause I “cheated on him” after he tried to cheat on me. But we were also technically on a break. Anyways looking back he used whore as an insult but he couldn’t get enough of them. He bought an OF chick’s package bundle she kind of looked like me with big eyes and brown hair and kind of a big nose or whatever I thought it was weird because all the girls he liked and pursued were very similar looking to me and he was obsessed with me but at first I thought it was a good thing, like he’s devoted or something (wrong) and he was si into with some girl with farquad hair and piercings and tattoos and who posted pics in lingerie. She had been the reason for many of our arguments, I was such a cuckquean. I’d call him a whore but I’m literally the only woman he’s had sex with even though he’s tried to like 40,000,000 times with a bunch of different ladies. He’s a hypocrite, I’m a worthless whore but he enjoyed “sluts” you can’t be addicted to porn and staring at girls you know that post their ass and then talk about how you hate whores who are easy and have no worth… he would make up stuff in his head to get mad/horny about. If i going out with friends and he’d say “you’re getting ready to go get some dick” men are weird and I am still honestly scared he will murder me, he’s like obsessed with me but also he wasn’t loyal and I didn’t like how I felt when I left the house with him and I had to pray I didn’t see some girl he was ogling on instagram. I felt so ugly. I was always competing with random women who probably didn’t even know he exists. I miss him sometimes because besides being a weird horny nutter before the por sickness and all the mess I thought we were soulmates, we had similar interests and we were like best friends. Has anyone else missed a moid who was honestly just the worst? He literally treated me like shit but I crave him.
No. 1875194
>>1875189I thought stokes smelled like toast? This is like rancid mold.
Even then is there a name for it? Something I can say to my GP?
No. 1875198
>>1875190It must've been a she,
nonnie. Good deed, thanks for saving her.
No. 1875213
File: 1706893587692.jpg (191.08 KB, 1576x2310, repenting-magdalene-also-calle…)
Hellweek has taught me how often I engage with retarded posts and derails. Mea culpa. I must not let the zoomers get to me.
No. 1875232
I find it really shitty that my parents had me. They already had 3 other kids that they were struggling to take care of, and my dad didn’t even work. He continued not to work for the next 22 years. He never assisted my pregnant mother with paying the bills lmfao. And of course they couldn’t adopt a child, they needed a pet that reminded them of themselves! I hope they both feel like idiots for reproducing me. I’m never going to do anything for them. They never gave me a trust fund, just a shitty life full of trauma and sadness then they shoved me out the door and said ‘have fun at college!’. My dad thought he was a ‘musician’ for my whole life, that was his autistic fixation. He so badly wanted to be a kiss-style face paint metal musician. You know. Something that hasn’t been popular in almost 60 years. So he was extremely dedicated to neglecting us, and going “on tour” across the country multiple times a year in an attempt to gain some kind of notoriety. The only thing he’s known for is being an annoying sperg. He would constantly complain about how much he hated living hand to mouth, but he also refused to get a job, refused to grow up, and refused to acknowledge that what he was doing was harming the people he’d chosen to bring into the world. My mother became an alcoholic because of her decision to have kids, and would constantly throw parties with my dad on school nights so they could make themselves feel famous and desired. In a garage with maybe 5 people in it. Gen X parents deserve the fucking guillotine. If I ever make any money, they’re never getting a cent from me. They’re never getting any grandchildren from me. They deserve to be forced to do nothing but sit in the corner and think about what they’ve done. My dads oldest child is a prostitute, his second child is a fast food employee who isn’t capable of thought and loves to give birth to more obese kids every year, his third child is an “actress” (prostitute) because she chose to follow in his attention seeking foot steps. And myself? I’m a sperg who can’t think about something that upsets me without having a seizure. My brain will shut down completely and I will become incapacitated if I remember something that I truly feel guilt over. I really hope they feel happy with the decision they made to reproduce me every single time they see me in the hospital with a fucking IV in each arm strapped down to the bed so I can’t rip the breathing tube out of my throat. They can go fuck themselves.
No. 1875259
I'm so frustrated.
I'm pregnant and I was looking at my referral for our genetic carrier testing I was going to get next week, looking at the places I need to go for it.
There's a few options, one that just tests me for the 3 main ones, and one that tests 500+ in both hubs and I.
When I talked to my dr I said I wanted the 500+ one but on the form she's given me it has nothing with hubs. I think she hasnt listened to me.
Looking at other 500+ forms theres an option for the partner.
Why would she not listen to me?
I have an appointment with her Wednesday (same day I was going to get the bloodwork done) but now I will have to ask her about it and see if she can do the one we want. Frustrating because I had asked for a script for my nausea and she said she would send it through but didnt, so I'm just dealing with the nausea until I can ask her about that too.
Why can people not just do their job, I dont know if I'm just a magnet for bad service or what. Literally its 50/50 no matter where I go if people do what they're meant to do. Surely if everyone was operating at a 50% fail rate society wouldnt be able to function?
I went for an ultrasound this week, when I made the booking there is an option to add the form in so I did.
When I got there the office worker said that no form was sent with my booking.. okay I dont believe you because I did send it but thats fine I will call the doctors office to get it.
>Called doctors office, asked if they could email through the form, she says "yes I'll do that now".
>Wait 10 minutes, no form has been emailed.
>Call back, same woman goes "oh I'll send it now haha".
>Okay.. sure cool. It gets sent.
>Ultrasound office worker says it needs a password.. okay I call drs a third time.
>Drs office says "It says in the email they need to call us for it. Whatever its abc1" cool thanks, write it down and give password to ultrasound worker.
>Passwords wrong. Holy fuck.
>Call drs office a fourth time "its abc1!" in the snarkiest tone. Like I get it I'm a bother but you didnt do your job emailing it when you said and also missed the !.
I know it was my issue because I didnt have the form in person, but holy fuck 2 of those 4 calls didnt have to happen? I didnt mishear she just missed the ! and didnt email when I called the first time.
No. 1875279
File: 1706896228698.jpg (44.3 KB, 604x453, 20231213_013935.jpg)
I don't know what it is but I feel like I'm in a fog somewhat I don't want to eat, talk, or even think..I can't enjoy music or art without getting irritated for no reason?(like mentally the noises are overwhelming and I don't know what to draw) I just want to lay down and do nothing..not feel anything or say anything.. I don't know how many times I've deleted posts here because I felt like it's best to stay silent than say anything even when I have something to contribute. I've stopped replying to friends online and offline it's just too..tiring I don't know if im going through a depression episode? I mean..I do have clinical depression and have taken meds for it but I don't feel sad about anything in particular?..I really don't know what it is? Is it burnout? Frustration? It's just feels like I want to unexist for a while..
No. 1875349
>>1875279Try a little melatonin and sunlight (if you can). You could also be vitamin D deficient. Not saying you don’t have depression, just that there could be deficiencies making it worse and what you’re describing sounds a lot like what it’s like to have a metabolism/immune issue.
When I was going through the same symptoms I found out my thyroid was messed up, my depression didn’t go away because of treatment but the brain fog improved and it became easier to work with/on my depression. There’s nothing worse then being unable to think clearly, sorry you’re having a sucky time with it nonna.
No. 1875534
File: 1706913665753.jpg (39.77 KB, 680x398, 20240202_163659.jpg)
My whole adult life has just been a cycle of this. I've been meaning to kill myself since I was 18 and I'm 29 now. I blindly waited for things to get better instead of actually working to improve my life and I think I've had enough finally.
No. 1875564
File: 1706915651850.jpeg (273.52 KB, 2000x1000, IMG_3758.jpeg)
I’m so tired of the tradthot thread getting locked. Im so tired of the retarded baiters and infighters. Lolcow just isn’t the same without Megha’s cringe.
No. 1875573
File: 1706916487635.jpg (38.42 KB, 941x887, 20240101_181054.jpg)
In a weak moment I downloaded a dating app, made a profile, swiped through like 10 matches and then deleted it. This shit is beyond humiliating and vapid. Also 9/10 profiles were of ugly moids despite setting my profile to be matched with men and women. Never again, I guess I'm just meant to die alone like one of those cat ladies incels go on about
No. 1875580
File: 1706916990520.jpeg (92.83 KB, 550x488, 4DE68D4F-D0CA-40B8-9439-E2DD6E…)
>>1875574Anon is a kappa holy shit
No. 1875596
File: 1706918745301.jpeg (2.76 KB, 248x203, images (1).jpeg)
There's this guy he's always acting mad weird around me, it's so awkward. Why does he look at me like that? Like, peeking then quickly looking away like I'm a freak? He also refuses to address me even though there have been several opportunities were he should like reunions and meetings, it feels like he's completely ignoring me and I don't even know what did I do wrong. It's strange, moids are such an enigma for me. I bet he thinks I'm retarded, I'm sick of stumbling upon him while I'm walking through the hall just to have these awkward moments yet again. I'm literally just minding my business, take a turn and there he is again! I know he cannot help it because we work at the same area but ugh, I just don't like it
No. 1875645
>>1875274Sorry you lost your pet
nonnie, pets passing away always suck. You gave your dog a good life and her spirit will always remember that. I just wanted to reply to recommend valacyclovir for preventing cold sores. My friend used to get them quite frequently whenever she was stressed, but once she got prescribed valacyclovir from her doctor, she hasn't had one since. It's worth looking into if you get nervous about spreading it or just don't like how they feel/look. It's just a pill you take when you feel one coming on and it halts the progression.
No. 1875649
File: 1706923473814.jpg (43.97 KB, 950x843, GFHOJVpXwAAscf2.jpg)
why did I have to get my dad's hairy ass genes?My mom has no hair on her legs. Gawd I can't afford any more laser hair removal, shits expensive.
No. 1875699
File: 1706928019102.png (211.71 KB, 429x421, 1615287081090.png)
It's 3:30 and I can't sleep again.
I have to get up at 5:30 to open the cafe so I can get money to afford the medicine (that half works or gives me horrific nightmares) to make me sleep so I can work. I need to work so I can sleep so I can work better.
I so fucking tired but too tired to sleep. I've spent the last two hours counting the paint grooves on the wall beside my bed. I can't remember the last time I didn't wake up completely drained.
No. 1875731
>>1875726samefagging, I literally see my future in front of me like the way they do cancer prognosis
>80% chance of 1 year survival>50% chance of 5 year survival>3% chance of 10 year survivalIt's not a question of if but when.
No. 1875755
>>1875673My parents would never lol. I started when I was 23 after saving up for a while.
>>1875679My legs are fine now but my chin whiskers and face hair bother me.
No. 1875791
File: 1706934680314.jpg (24.18 KB, 543x330, forehead_wrinkles_ce053159-137…)
>>1875786I think she means this. I don't know why it's such a problem
No. 1875824
File: 1706937800635.jpg (861.44 KB, 1280x1287, 1000005539.jpg)
I want to kill my father and commit suicide
No. 1875842
File: 1706939776170.png (423.11 KB, 473x495, Screen Shot 2024-02-03 at 12.2…)
>>1875823>Identify the traits and characteristics of your ideal self.>Determine appropriate methods to achieve those ideal traits/characteristics.>Identify the parts of yourself that you dislike, i.e., the parts of yourself that you make you especially self-conscious and contribute most to your low self-esteem.>Determine whether those aforementioned parts are changeable or if they are innate.>Accept, or at least tolerate, the innate parts of yourself; work to abandon or modify the changeable parts of yourself that cause you grief.Lot's of ugly/rude/annoying/retarded people live really fun fulfilling lives. They don't let their flaws define them, so why should you let yours define you? It's hurtful to hear but low self-esteem is indicative of a self-centered and selfish mindset. Try to focus on things outside of yourself: find new hobbies, start taking walks in nature, do some volunteer work. Eventually you'll wake up one day and realize you don't give a damn about the same things you spent so much time mulling over
No. 1875850
There's this moid I know that wasn't being good to one of his (younger) friends, and so I basically told that young friend when he came to me for advice about it to drop anyone that he felt wasn't good to him and took away from his happiness. The moid took this as me "shit talking" him, which maybe I was idc he's notoriously a bad person. Anyway, he's been throwing a total tantrum about it since, calling me a snake, a liar, a manipulator. I just in general don't like him. He talks shit about me, he has a girlfriend but is always "jokingly" flirting with egirls online, there's a million negative things I could say. But he recently cost me a work related opportunity with his shit talking so I've been particularly pissed at him lately.
He just found out his girl cheated on him tonight, and none of his friends are being sympathetic because this gross moid who lacks empathy has perfectly curated a group of friends that behave just like him. All of his friends are just clowning on him for his girl cheating, no one is offering any reassurance, he's just crying in the group chat and being made fun of by all of his "friends". Karma bitch.
No. 1875917
File: 1706955045759.png (134.92 KB, 1334x300, 7hshcreonsh30onmg24y0126famt 1…)
Gay men are so horrible, sorry not sorry. Imagine hearing about the abuse you went through as a child mocked and laughed at, with men dressing up as the woman who beat you and making it seem like fun and games. Wtf is wrong with drag queens, seriously
No. 1875942
File: 1706958493800.jpg (185.99 KB, 1280x1280, 009b1ed47322be9b602aae2018f6cd…)
>new year
>wanna spend less because i had to move and my new apartment's rent is twice as much as the old one
>plan to replace phone battery in 3 year old phone to keep using it for at least another year or two
>phone suddenly starts acting up from one minute to the next
>take it in for repair
>unfixable hardware component failure
i'm picking up my new phone in an hour, ugh.
No. 1876000
>>1875991Like I posted on cc and people were mean to me because it was clearly retarded and delusional because I was being anxious about something that doesn’t make sense but seeing other people be mean to me makes he want to stab myself in the chest and pull my heart out by force just to take this heavy liquid feeling off my chest and be able to breathe. I can’t cope anymore I feel so anxious all the time sometimes I think about killing myself so all the rapid beating, shaking, intrusive thoughts, doubts and questioning, fears stop for once.
I’m taking meds and they were working irl because I had severe social anxiety but I was able to finally look people in the eye and talk to them and make friends but in situations like these I still have extreme anxiety and I still have intrusive thoughts with frequency and it’s so miserable I wish they could stop my life is perfect and it’s all ruined because it won’t stop beating and I’m incapable of doing anything because this weight keeps pushing me down.