[ Rules ] [ ot / g / m ] [ pt / snow / w ] [ meta ] [ Matrix ] [ Discord ]

/ot/ - off-topic

Password (For post deletion)

File: 1653638044494.jpg (45.56 KB, 680x695, ffa.jpg)

No. 1198440

Previous thread:

Discuss anything pertaining to Autism, Aspergers or ADHD/ADD experiences as a woman here.
Talk about the difficulty of diagnosis as a woman, the struggles with being compared to male autists. Or even discuss the recent uptick in autism diagnoses in online mental health communities like Tiktok.

No. 1198446

Autists? On my lolcow?

It's more likely than you think.

No. 1198451

No. 1198466

I feel like I relate more to male autists than I do to non autistic women and that sucks, I wish I could have friendships with women but it's like we live in two different worlds.

No. 1198506

File: 1653642709649.png (58.66 KB, 200x200, wojak-cat-feels-in-bed-thumbna…)

>recent uptick in autism diagnoses in online mental health communities like Tiktok
mfw i didnt even think it was possible for me to be an autismo until earlier this year and watching tiktok kids self-diagnose makes me feel like an attention-whoring faker. i flew under the radar during my entire childhood because of immigrant parents but i very clearly remember that it just fit way too well when i finally actually read into it properly, like someone typed out my entire life story in words. it was cathartic to discover that there was finally a legitimate reason for why the hell im like this but i also feel like its made me more insecure because i am now way more conscious of my dumb and weird mannerisms. oh well

No. 1198515

Same anon. I related to a lot of the previous thread and recently got some documents from my elementary school days saying that I fit the profile of having asperger's, but nothing was ever pursued for some reason, so I just got the depression/anxiety diagnoses. I've struggled with being a functioning human being for so long and getting an actual diagnosis would be great to get the help I need but apparently it's difficult. Some of the places I was looking into had really limited testing methods that still favored male autism too.
The 'new school' autism that accounts for the differences in female behavior has been somewhat validating but I also feel like a super faker because it still feels like a reach to me.

No. 1198596

Honestly this quirky autismo 4chan mascot girl is pretty cringe for an OP, I didn't expect her to be used here.

No. 1198599

I have ADHD (i think). My roommate has autism AND adhd. She’s a nightmare and like a tornado. Her eyes however, kind of disgust me. They’re not necessarily ugly alone, but kind of psycho. I can’t explain. But when she talks to me, I see too much white and in the middle of talking it randomly spurts open. Is it understandable to get upset at this kind of eye contact? I thought since autists can’t into eye contact it might have to do with her autism, but it may be her borderline personality disorder/other kind of personality disorder.

No. 1198602

File: 1653649299182.jpeg (59.23 KB, 325x550, F556EDFA-B469-4258-997B-0CCA2B…)

This is pseudo science imo, but the third set and fifth set is basically what her eyes look like to me. It just looks unsettling. Or is it not at all pseudo science? It’s not like I’m any better, since I have the first set. I’m a person with a lot of stress and anxiety.

No. 1198606

File: 1653649637919.png (313.62 KB, 638x359, eb7.png)

sometimes i wonder if i'm autistic or if i'm just a product of deffective rolemodels + childhood trauma + general sensitivity.
as i grow up and experience life, i've come to realize that my mom's behavior was not normal in the first place. she's always been prone to big outbursts, lots of nitpicking, very judgemental comments towards myself and high expectations for my own behavior. i started showing signs of mild anxiety early on but she'd always tell me i "used to be normal but became irrational" and that i wasn't anything like her. now i see that she's as much of an anxious mess as i used to be until recently.
she didn't really have friends and often dropped friendships after big fights and lots of drama and she'd always tell me that if someone wronged me even in the slightest, i should drop them. i thought it was just standing up for myself but now i see that telling a kid to cut off another kid for cancelling your sleepover is absolutely demented. her and my dad also cut off most of their family for good reasons so i was pretty isolated and without many examples of healthy socialization. my mom picked me up for lunch and immediately after school so i never really got to socialize beyond recess until highschool.
sorry for long post but i think you can see that i was starting off on the wrong foot.
i also got slightly bullied for being the weird weeb goth kid and it completely shut me off. i became bitter and believed that no one could ever be my friend beyond the few who somehow liked me already. mixed with my father's death which was really hard to deal with emotionnally with my mom freaking out all the time and my tiny child brain not being able to process it… i turned to the internet early and kept telling myself that only liking underground stuff and staying away from the normies was super cool and healthy, actually. tumblr also damaged my brain with all the SJW bullshit even if i'm completely healed from that now.

all these unhealthy behaviors took so long to undo and now i still struggle to interact with people and make new friends. maybe i'm autistic but maybe i was also set up to be like this. maybe a mix of both. anyway i'm not sure what a diagnosis would do for me since i don't sperg out or have meltdowns because of sensitivity issues. i tend to be obsessive about my interests but now i don't drop them nearly as quickly as i used to so i don't think it's an issue. it's mostly the social issues i'd like to completely disappear.

sorry for the novel nonnies i just can't admit to anyone i think i might have autism

No. 1198607

There are just people with overly intense/bulging eyes. I don't know if it's some milder case of mild hyperthyroidism or just weird facial features, since they're also always overly energetic people that are tiring to just be around but their wide open eyes and mannerism also makes them seem dumber than they are imo. It'd be a nightmare to live with someone like that.

No. 1198608

It annoys me, but maybe nd nonas relate to a more nuanced interpretation of her. I had to hide it, it was aggravating me, kek.

No. 1198614

Sorry anon, I worried she would get bad feedback but I wanted something more interesting than just posting an infographic and thought it'd be acceptable. I probably should have used the sesame street girl

No. 1198615

File: 1653649979241.jpg (33.07 KB, 500x333, 1634754144849.jpg)

Does anyone else have an autism diagnosis but feel like their social skills are too good to qualify as autistic? I'm not amazing socially or anything but people in general seem to like me and I can read tone/body language/expressions OK. In fact I seem to be very much more aware of those things than most people and way more sensitive to other peoples' emotions than average also. I always wonder if my social anxiety was so severe it just made me get diagnosed as autistic (it was very severe and I could barely speak). But apart from social skills, I relate pretty heavily to being autistic. So I'm not sure.

No. 1198617

File: 1653650171060.gif (486.17 KB, 498x280, 1653047493387.gif)

You're telling me meticulously curated and maintained dox of lolcows is probably the result of an autistic special interest?

I'm shocked I tell you.

No. 1198621

I wonder this too. I actually find myself being the first to understand a joke when others, even neurotypicals, don't get it. And I think I can read body language well enough. I think my issue comes from assumptions or projecting my own feelings onto others. Call it female socialization but even in lists of same sex traits, not understanding social cues or hyperbole is a big one. So I dunno.

No. 1198622

I think it's the eternal dilemma for terminally online and/or loner people. The chicken and the egg question of "am I weird because I'm autistic or do I display autistic traits because I'm undersocialized"

No. 1198665

I do kind of have a hard time with jokes if I'm not familiar with the person's style of humor. But it doesn't cause me issues since I can tell when someone is telling a joke and I laugh anyway. Tbh not sure if my good social skills are a result of being very friendly and laughing/smiling/nodding appropriately at the person regardless of my own feelings about the conversation. But do neurotypical people also do this and that's why their social skills are better too? Do autists lack this ability to do this appropriately? Idfk.

I find it confusing because I relate heavily to things I would have thought neurotypical people can't relate to at all, like I stim a lot and have strong sensory issues. Like can you develop that shit just from being a loner? It just seems like the fundamental autism thing is social skills are mine are definitely passable.

No. 1198674

My psychiatrist tries to get me to find a job that will not fucking ruin me since the one that I currently have is not fit at all for a person with intense (is there any other?) ADHD-PI/ADD and social avoidance. Does any of you have an idea what could fit me? I've been trying to find a position like this my whole life and I still have no fucking idea. Especially taking into account that I need at least slightly more than a minimum salary to afford rent, medicine, food etc.
I will research this more, but thought it does not hurt to ask.

No. 1198676

Damn anon, you’re crazily smart. What’s your disease, autism or adhd?

No. 1198685

My mom said last night that I was originally diagnosed as autistic but a second impression said I checked more Tourette’s. the dr basically told her to stick with the autism diagnosis because there’s more money that we could claim.

No. 1198718

I'm sorry for laughing, that's so fucking weird, what the fuck. How do you feel about this confession? I'd be upset, at the very least.

No. 1198797

I’ve spent the past 15-20 years thinking I’m autistic but I do think I have traits of both.

No. 1199337

Diagnosed spergs, did you have to bring a parent in for your evaluation? That's the only thing stopping me from getting the diagnosis. I'm so embarrassed by the thought of my parents sitting there being questioned on how retarded I was as a kid and how retarded they perceive me to be today. I wanted to get the diagnosis and not tell anyone ever but I guess it's not possible?

No. 1199406

Yeah I did have to have a parent with me. It was important for the childhood history part. I don't know how it normally goes though that was just my experience. I'm sure there has to be some allowances for people who don't have a living parent/guardian they are in contact with. For your case I would kindly say get over it.

No. 1199598

File: 1653687133233.jpg (66.82 KB, 469x600, A-Certain-Obstinance.jpg)

blog incoming:
oh boy its prior auth time!
time for all my hard work developing routines and maintaining good habits to be destroyed by ? weeks without medication because the insurance company i pay thousands of dollars to every year is hoping that if they put enough hoops in front of me, maybe this time ill give up and let my whole life fall apart forever. lucky for me i am so stubborn that a doctor literally diagnosed me as obstinate and defiant once. plus this happens every fucking year so at least i know exactly what to do. i am on hold with doctors office to make sure theyve called the insurance company and then im gonna call the pharmacy every day for the next couple weeks until they have my stupid fucking pills.
id be grateful for the motivation to push through my social phobia and make phone calls i need to make, but not having stimulants triggers a cascade of bullshit that sucks just as much as crippling anxiety so its not much of a win. plus there are about four million equally super important things i need to do but im spending my energy on this, and im gonna reward myself by not putting any of that other shit on my to-do list for today. (not cuz im a spoony but cuz my habit is to reward myself for success by adding things to my to-do list. this is an excellent way to destroy motivation to do anything at all if youre looking for one for some reason.)

id welcome any pro-tips, like if theres a way to know exactly when the prior auth request will be coming, please share.

No. 1199600

Sounds like and your mom both have it.

No. 1199738

A councillor told me I should get autism testing just based off what I told them about my childhood experiences and idk. I always thought there was a chance I could be on the spectrum just because of how much of a social failure I am and the fact that I always deal with feeling guilty for not behaving the way I feel like people want me to behave and not having the correct responses and emotions towards certain situations. The biggest thing that stopped me from ever pursuing testing was the fact that I do not have sensory issues nor am I someone who has a strict routine of any kind. I feel like I am wasting my time on this, especially since there seems to be no help where i live for anybody over 19.

No. 1199754

Do any anons here have tips on how to manage the sound sensitivity? College classes have been really difficult for me, because almost everyone uses a laptop and the sound of typing drives me insane while I'm trying to listen to the lecture. I'm still able to get good grades and all, but it's just an awful experience.

No. 1199756

I use earbuds, nonny. They don't have to be noise cancelling, just having earbuds in helps dampen noise. I also recommend getting noise cancelling headphones at some point for later though, because you might be in a situation later that they can be really helpful in (like blocking out people yelling or road noise, things like that).

No. 1199767

Sometimes I think I'm too autistic for a serious relationship, one where you come home and have to talk to them everyday. I'll admit to being an introvert that needs my alone time unbothered or else I get really agitated. I'm also extremely touchy on being touched, sometimes I crave it but other times I can go weeks without someone touching me.
I've never been in a serious relationship like this and don't know if I can be, maybe I just need to find another autist like me.

No. 1199772

File: 1653699298536.png (740.9 KB, 932x609, Capture.PNG)

Honestly, I've always liked her. Finally feel represented in something. OP could have picked a better image though.

No. 1199780

I have ADHD and I hate this thread pic, now I will see it being bumped always and it's gonna suck.

No. 1199788

You can hide the thread and/or threadpic

No. 1199796

I hate the thread pic not only because of the coomer undertones like I got a feeling the artist draws coomer shit but also because the perspective is all fucky, it triggers me.
I don't hate it enough to hide it, though. Agh.

No. 1199800

I like character Ashbie as a face of female autism since it's always seen as a moid problem, so it's nice to have something for once. But, the "original" owner who runs the Instagram I think is a tranny which is sad. When he dated that fakeboi, she posted a voice note and Ashbie sounded like a text to speech female bot or a man putting on a voice and trying so hard. I'm not trying to derail so I'll shut the fuck up but I know somethings off
Artist I think is teyoid, they draw bastardised anime girls kek

No. 1199876

Last thread pic was cool and informative, it truly takes the wrong type of autist to pick the ugliest thread pic ever.

No. 1199879

Ugly shit, someone remake the thread please.

No. 1199902

Any other adhdfags here. I hate this stupid disorder, I'm like an adult child. I can't remember to shower and my emotions are all over the place, all the time. I need to go back on medication but I can't due to financial/medical reasons at least until september. The worst part is rejection dysphoria, it sounds stupid but it's so real. People mildly ribbing on me will stay in my head for years. I feel like I remember every single time I was rejected or hurt by others and even small additions to that stack of memories makes me feel like I'm going to crumble under the weight. I don't know if this makes any sense. Basically I hate that adhd is real and that I have it.

No. 1199924


Yep i feel retarded some days because of it. I have to rely on sticky notes and lists of things to do otherwise it won’t get done. Too busy wondering what it’d be like to have fur on your tongue or when were snails discovered or so on and then you’ve become homeless because you didn’t pay any of your bills or do your job because you remembered that one time someone made a small comment that didn’t even matter yet still it crushes you inside. Medication is so helpful but it’s truly a pain in the ass to actually get it every month.

No. 1199940

File: 1653714601700.png (205.84 KB, 400x348, B482E001-74EA-4A04-8CB2-BEA8BF…)

i can’t stand seeing attention hungry teenagers turning a neurodevelopmental disorder that makes daily life incredibly hard, to something they can get internet specialty points for. my social skills are pretty good for being autistic, yet in the recent year i have seen online autistic spaces rise the bar for what is ””high functioning”” constantly. it feels like what people consider being autistic is morphing more and more to just neurotypical, with a few quirks.

on the other side, i really am happy to see more autistic women and girls be able to get help, recognition and support.

No. 1199982

Holy shit it's just a picture calm down and hide it

No. 1200162

I don't have routines either, I just like things done a certain way. I think the routine thing can be a bit misleading.

No. 1200165

Communicating with NTs can be so annoying. I speak clearly, I am rude. They don't speak clearly and I am rude for trying to clarify.

No. 1200169

adhd/add and autism are not related. adhd/add groups are just trying to get more recognition via the autism label. adhd and autism are comorbid, but in their own they're like opposites.

No. 1200178

blogpost rant but bear with me

i may be alone forever unless i make myself miserable from constantly pretending to be normal. literally no friends stick around. i got along well with scrotes until they bully me because i won't date them, or until they leave because i got a boyfriend. having a boyfriend is a bit less lonely than having nobody but men don't have the emotional depth. girls sniff out the slightest bit of the tism and label me as cringy and useless immediately. i don't put up with that. then i get the bitch label, and they end up bullying me too. at least in adulthood the bullying is not so intense, but the fact that they still do it is insane. i am already an autist so why do they have to make me even more miserable??? autist girls don't like me either i don't know why, maybe i look like their bullies or someshit. it's a bit better when i embrace a subculture but i had to tone it down to get a job.

seeing other people with childhood friends, big weddings, tons of comments under their posts and hundreds of likes on their pictures fills me with sadness and envy. i wish i was good enough to have girl friends. usually when i message someone they flake off or write back much less than i do. internet friends are easier to have and may be the only friends i can sustain. i have been trying my entire life to accept forever loneliness. conforming to a group just for a feeling of togetherness is way too tiring to keep up and lacks the depth of emotional connection i actually crave.

No. 1200184

I've had the same experiences anon. If it helps, I've found that the less I try to be social and look at social media of others being social, the less lonely I feel. The loneliness comes from not having friends but also from being constantly rejected. Looking at social media (which is fake anyway) is just like being rejected repeatedly.

Nowadays I only talk to my bf and listen to audiobooks and take part in online communities for socialization. Finding a good bf is difficult but worth it if you can. Look for an introvert.

After a while, you get used to being alone. It's also a relief not having to mask all the time. You learn to get emotional connections from media (favourite books, characters, etc) and from pets. It's not the same but being alone doesn't have to mean being lonely.

No. 1200190

>not having friends
>my bf
Holy fucking shit

No. 1200194

>Looking at social media (which is fake anyway) is just like being rejected repeatedly.
you phrased it so well. thanks for the advice anon.
seeing social media interactions of normies is painful, because it does feel like rejection. their abundance of friends reminds me of my lack even though i don't crave a big friend group or very busy social life at all
>im commenting to prove i am your friend
>i compliment you to show you what good friend i am
>i talk about our history together to strenghten our bond and reinforce it in the eyes of others
over and over i just can't imagine how often and what they talk about to be that close and supportive, and for what they need to show that off for. i can appreciate and support people in private. my online friendships are much easier to keep up and i am fine with not meeting them in real life. it can be too much. i will heed your advice actually. when i went off grid for a camp without internet i relaxed in nature, immersed myself in nice stories and worked on crafts. it was lovely. there is much fun to be had without people. and you are right. i don't have to participate in digital social facade.

No. 1200195

Has anyone else being diagnosed autistix but think they are actually schizoid?

No. 1200197

>im commenting to prove i am your friend
>i compliment you to show you what good friend i am
>i talk about our history together to strenghten our bond and reinforce it in the eyes of others
I hate those types of messages too. They seem fake and it doesn't occur to me to say them because they are so obviously fake. Yet NTs seem to lap them up and hate me for not doing it.

No. 1200198

File: 1653740024176.jpeg (29.13 KB, 475x475, 5859C999-55D7-40DD-AA6B-5F3552…)

Godamn, I wish I had something to hyperfixate on like other autists. I just have don’t have any passion for a specific thing for me to sperg about like I used to when I was younger. That isn’t to say that I’m apathetic or anything, I still care about my friends, doing well in school etc and enjoy doing things, it’s just that nothing has ever been able to capture me in the the same way when I was younger, and I kind of hate it. I feel like an autist with generally better lateral thinking than vertical thinking as a result of this, which makes conversation more interesting and makes my social skills more adept.

I literally thought that I passed as a normie for the most part and I think I still sort of do to most people, but recently a friend asked if I was autistic and said that she was able to clock that I was autistic because she worked with autists in the past. I don’t even know what exactly made her clock me as autistic, so I’m guessing it might have been stuff like facial expressions, hand gestures or just ‘vibes’. I don’t want to out myself as being autistic, but I wish I knew if people are able to perceive my autism, or what things make it noticeable

No. 1200201

Why not just ask her why she asked you? You don't have to say you already know.

No. 1200205

Yeah, I normally hate when people claim to be completely alone but have a bf (or close family) as I was like that for many years. But as the poster before me said, having a friend (especially a best female friend) and a bf will never be the same.

I'm not going to pretend having a bf is close to being a complete loner but only having a bf does have it's lonely aspects too, especially if you don't have close female relatives to take their place.

No. 1200211

It's also helpful to not think of anyone you do talk with as a potential friend. They are just someone making small talk. If they want to be a friend, let them make all the effort.

I think autistic women sometimes struggle with telling polite conversation and potential friendships apart, which leads to rejection. NTs drop hints that they don't want to be friends and we miss all of them.

Basically just minimise the number of potential situations where you can be rejected and it will help a lot with loneliness.

No. 1200214

I have some "normal" friends that I'm not overly close with and it's so hard for me not to out myself as a friendless loser lol. People consider meeting 4 different groups, be baking for some social outing and going to dates just a regular day of the week, and it'd fucking kill me even if I had to do this all in a single week. Some girl canceled tutoring on me because she had to many social responsibilities, and holy shit I cannot relate.

No. 1200219

>I have some "normal" friends that I'm not overly close with and it's so hard for me not to out myself as a friendless loser lol.
I hated this when I did try to be social. It's not enough to be a good friend, it's like you have to come with references from other people too.

Maybe you can pretend to have a hobby you spend a lot of time doing? Like running or pottery or something and so you are "too busy" for lots of friends. NTs love being able to claim they are too busy for things.

No. 1200220

>boy-friend as your only social support and outlet
Have fun taking abuse like a doormat because you don't have anyone else and it's better than complete social isolation. Or facing it anyway when the scrote suddenly drops you for what he thinks is Manic Pixie Dream Girl.

No. 1200221

lowkey, cuz i definitely dont relate to alot of these autists, no offense autistnons

No. 1200222

>NTs drop hints that they don't want to be friends and we miss all of them
What are some of those hints?

No. 1200224

No idea, I'm a sperg too. I've just put this together from experience and reading other autistic experiences. I wish there was a subreddit or something where autistic people could have NTs spell out what all their various hints are.

If I had to guess, I'd say not seeming very enthusiastic to meet up again? Not asking for phone numbers? Saying "we should do this again sometime" which is meant as a polite goodbye and not actually an indication that they want to meet up. Unless they suggest something specific (that isn't them trying to use you) assume you're not going to be friends.

It's easiest just to let them make the effort and not try yourself to be honest.

No. 1200225

File: 1653741880237.jpg (72.15 KB, 640x549, joker_cat_by_scartalon123-3017…)

i done the first two and it resulted in having no friends, other than scrotes i hoped/thought were my friends, only to later realize, they talked to me for ulterior motives.

i keep making small talk with people and retreating after, until it turns into something better. i like making people laugh. i wanted to avoid social interactions completely but. i moved countries multiple times because i wanted to reinvent myself. i taught i could get rid of my awkwardness. and it helped get rid of that, but not the exhaustion i felt for faking my face, tone of voice and interest to everyone around me the whole day and sometimes even my own flatmates. i thought i was depressed for a long time because of not knowing it is spergshit. maybe it's both, i don't know.
getting to know new people regularly is my cope towards normaldom.

same, their lives seems to entirely revolve around hanging out with others. i could not imagine doing that for just one day either, it sounds stressful as fuck. but if i don't also mention some friendshit they think i am a creep.

>any other anons take on personas to bear with situations?

i have a joking persona where i remember all of my funny stories and make myself upbeat and bubbly, and shortly leave after making people laugh. couple this with having weirdly colored hair and i get away with more weird behaviors because people don't expect me to be normal once seeing it.

No. 1200226

Oh, I don't really care about appearing busy anymore, even though I did make up shit in the past when I was asked about my weekend or something. Nowadays I leave it up to implications , I won't cancel on someone just because of some kind of social flex. I like to have the image of a reserved person with a smaller friend group instead of like a yuppie social butterfly, while in reality at most I have professional relationships and only my parents to call if I need help.
The thing is that highly social people just think their experience is baseline, and they feel awkward when you don't pick up the "you THINK you're busy? listen to my life" game. They talk in a "you know how it is"-way and I just go "yeah, sure", but I know over time they can pick up that I don't have a lot going on.

No. 1200236

>i have a joking persona where i remember all of my funny stories and make myself upbeat and bubbly, and shortly leave after making people laugh. couple this with having weirdly colored hair and i get away with more weird behaviors because people don't expect me to be normal once seeing it.
I used to do this to blend in but you're basically playing the jester for them. They don's see you on the same level, they just want to laugh at you and you're too sperg to realise it.

No. 1200273

Is it an autistic masking thing or is it normal to keep certain hobbies to yourself? Like only talk about mainstream movies with people you know and keep your love for say, Weimar Republic era cinema a secret because surely they wouldn't know about it?

No. 1200300

Autistic. Normies might do it too but leans more autistic masking.

No. 1200301

Honestly, after 20 years of being literally lonely (no friends, no partners, family there but completely emotionally unavailable) with no one to talk to about happy or sad events of my life, having a bf is definitely better than being really lonely. Like I would even take a bf or gf pretending to be my lover, you become that desperate. And a lot of people are happy with their partners.

No. 1200302

Would it be less autistic to sperg about your niche interests?

No. 1200307

Huh? Masking and keeping things secret to avoid sperging is autistic. Normies don't have niche interests normally, but when they do, they talk about them normally as they can resist sperging.

No. 1200384

I’m quite good at reading expressions and understanding jokes and am significantly better at catching misunderstandings when they happen than anyone else I know, but I think I developed those skills by staying on the fringes of conversation and observing people. When watching shows or movies with interpersonal intrigue like Jane Austen movies, Downton Abbey, Game of Thrones etc. I’m usually the one who has to explain to everyone else why two characters suddenly hate each other or why something someone said was significant to the plot or whatever. But I can only do this when I’m off to the side observing. If I’m expected to join in on the conversation it can get overwhelming and cause me to drop my spaghetti.

No. 1200399

I know this is conceited as hell, but I honestly think no one has ever taken my autism seriously because i'm pretty and look/dress like a "stacey". Has anyyone else had this experience?

No. 1200405

Yes, I think this is common in women who have a late diagnosis. They are seen as manic pixie dream girls, quirky, etc.

No. 1200406

Serious question: what is the difference being autistic and not fitting in socially due to a long period of isolation?

No. 1200407

Being socially awkward is only one aspect of autism.

No. 1200410

Parody of deranged Depp fans(wrong thread)

No. 1200414

Wrong thread?

No. 1200416

autism =/= social maladjustment.

No. 1200418

Damn, yes.

No. 1200421

Nta but I assure you this was crafted with autism

No. 1200428

… Delete it??

No. 1200449

>find another autist like me
I'm trying to get with this autistic guy. It's difficult for both of us. You know how pinkpilled dating rules tells us we should never try to fix a man? Yeah that's hard when just the though of being hugged gives him crazy anxiety. We have so much work to do. As you mention, we both need a lot of alone time. I don't think any NT male would prefer it that way so maybe you should give autistic guys a chance. Being able to outright say ''hey I'm feeling super overwhelmed today and don't want to talk'' or being able to tell each other you'd like a couple of weeks of no contact without anyone getting hurt? It's heaven compared to trying to adjust to NT guys normie ways.

I feel like autistic couples have to work a lot together and show a looot of patience towards each others quirks. But I also feel like autistic men are the only moids who somewhat understand us. You're more likely to speak the same language.

No. 1200555

Vent but I"m so tired of uni. Having to do this final project all on my own while having the lovely combination of ADHD and autism without any meds makes it near impossible. I'm getting extremely anxious just looking at it and I don't know how to get out of it.

No. 1200623

i'm by no means trying to armchair diagnose or anything but that description of adhd sounds a lot like bpd, is anyone here comorbid with both or have thoughts on it? i think i've heard that they present similarly in women. also reminds me of the forever ongoing autism or bpd debate online

No. 1200643

I don't have any symptoms of bpd other than emotional disregulation which is a major (possibly THE major) symptoms of adhd. I've been diagnosed professionally w adhd for seven years, not every mentally ill woman is bpd.

No. 1200650

i'm aware nonna, sorry if it sounded like i was forcing a diagnosis onto you if you're that anon. i'm just curious about people's thoughts on the common symptoms between the two, especially because i've been seeing discourse surrounding it a lot, and how bpd might be overdiagnosed in women.

No. 1200655

nta but how does emotional disregulation manifest?

No. 1200669

It's the inability to calm yourself down when you're upset. Like your emotions ratchet up to extremes at minor provocation and you don't know how to deal with it.

No. 1200775

File: 1653774820295.gif (6.53 MB, 498x361, EF8CB2F1-9017-40FE-9727-7EEDA4…)

I will smile and laugh and make all the expected expressions but when people turn their backs and finally leave me alone my face just drops. All the muscles relax and I feel so much better. It's kinda alarming because I feel like a sociopath for lying to everyone but at the same time relieved I can stop acting. Life is so exhausting.

No. 1200802

Same and everytime i have even slightly brought it, someone says I must be autistic and masking. I’m just not an expression-y bitch, damn.

No. 1200851

Okay so I just want some nonnie opinions on this theory that i've had for a while. I look back on my school history and see clear and obvious signs of ADHD. Disruptive, talkative, argumentative with teachers particularly when bored, inconsistent work output dependant on whether I was personally interested in the topic, etc. Like I was mad for a while but times past and i've got over it but it seems like dyslexia is the first port of call, then from there other ND are screened for. That theory might just be on my head, or a regional thing (UKfag) but I'm wondering if anyone else has noticed this? Like I was otherwise "smart" and capable, but I couldn't revise for the life of me, and because i was seemingly "smart" teachers wouldn't believe that i didn't understand what the fuck revision even was. If anyone can relate I'd love to hear from you, slso for transparency, not diagnosed so take with that what you will.

Also i had a friend that i am sure looking back on was austistic. high achiever, sensitive, special interested in animals, particularly wolves. I swear women are perpetually screwed over and im sick. of. it.

No. 1200945

Basically extreme, illogical emotional reactions that are very hard/impossible to calm. One example from my life is losing things, I HATE losing things but it's more than normal annoyance. If I lose something I will start to go into this weird emotional spiral where it feels like my life is out of control and I freak out and start yelling/sometimes hitting myself etc. It's weird and embarrassing but the best way I can describe it is having your emotions turned up to ten and on a hair trigger all the time.

No. 1201011

exact same here. I'm hesitant to tell anyone or ask about it IRL because I don't want to sound like I'm larping

No. 1201014

kek i do this too

No. 1201036

I'm the polar opposite, I don't know what kind of faces I make with people but I know I do move my face around a lot when I am thinking in my head. It would upset some of my teachers I think who thought I was making faces at them I guess but I was just daydreaming.

No. 1201046

This is me when I'm off my Adderall lol. I went to the dentist the other day and the cleaning tech. complimented me on my shirt. I'd taken only half a pill that day and normally I would've been chatty and be all thankful but that day, it was like my brain was either too retarded to fire a neuron quick enough, or I just didn't give a fuck. I just smiled and looked down at my shirt. I'm not a sociopath, either, but it's like my brain doesn't really care about social mores. Feels kinda nice.

No. 1201047

i don't mind being the clown if they actually like me. when they're judgmental normies i can tell the difference. like when i made a joke to my friends in highschool and a normie was watching me and laughing saying "do it again" i obviously didn't mean to entertain them specifically but my friend friend the same sense of humor. now there's many kind people in alternative scenes, i never had that problem there.

No. 1201050

Life's too short to worry about randos taking me seriously or not.

No. 1201058

same, as long as i am having fun, others like it and it isn't exhausting i don't even care if a few people think i'm a cringey weirdo. i think people that judge me for something i was born with is more cringe and i am not wasting my time on thinking about them much less trying to appeal to their boringness and shallowness

No. 1201075

Not to be all NLOG but why is talking to neurotypical women so hard? When I'm alone I feel normal and capable, but compared to most women I come off as some primitive ape thing. If I do somehow manage to make a connection, I usually end up being treated like a pet or a child, or they only talk to me when they need information about some special interest of mine. I'm way too intense and sporty for most nerd girls, so I usually end up getting along with men even though I don't like most of them. Even my closest, long-term female friends treat me like a basket case and make fun of me for shit I can't control, or they shower me with fake compliments and enthusiasm despite never initiating conversation or meeting plans. Fuck this gay earth, I think I'll go live in the jungle where I apparently belong.

No. 1201121

Its so obvious I have aspergers irl and I hate it so much..

No. 1201129

Are you me? Can you take me to the jungle with you?

No. 1201131

Because men are inherently autistic and very shallow, their friendships are easy but not worth as much especially if you're a woman because they only care about pussy or supporting other random men for most cases.
They also treat girls nicely because they think they can fuck or date you one day. Most of my male friends came out with their romantic feelings after tricking me for months.

No. 1201133

File: 1653804184524.jpg (59.54 KB, 599x532, pink.jpg)

I need to find an irl hobby that aspie or at least nerdy, weird women gravitate towards. Nigel is nice and all but having no other social life is eating away at me. And I get along with nerdy scrotes but I've accepted I'll never be friends with them the way I could be with women. Been there done that honestly

No. 1201153

fuck reading this thread makes me want to cry. i remember sobbing to my mom in middle school about not being able to make any friends. i still can't, and now i'm almost 30 anyways and a complete shut-in. i can't even make friends online, it truly is a lonely af miserable existence. i want "friends," i crave social bonds but am clueless. mood shifts a million times a day, it's exhausting and i'm honestly amazed I've made it this far in life but i'm too stubborn to not keep going. i feel like my mom knows too but never told me for whatever reason. i was in therapy super young for being a problem child… always wonder what they told her. She's a super depressed alcoholic tho so who fuckin knows. anyways, i need a hug, thank God for cats

No. 1201171

File: 1653809729545.png (135.98 KB, 236x236, EBF4DB3C-8F49-4786-B86D-3D3E18…)

i can relate to a lot of those feelings, for whatever it is worth. virtual hug for you.

No. 1201248

Of course, anon, we can be neighbours.

Oh trust me I know, I've been on more accidental 'dates' than I can count because I was literally too autistic/disinterested to understand men thought they could score when I was just trying to be friends and hang out. What really disgusts me is now that I'm more confident and assertive and less concerned with trying to be conventionally attractive, most men my age or younger pretend like I don't exist if I try to talk to them. All my former male 'friends' are gone because either they were being creepy or they ditched me once they got girlfriends, and I don't care to make any more.

No. 1201335

Does anyone else feel that neurotypicals are weird about compliments? I often find the follow situations occur:

1. Neurotypical compliments me on something so basic it seems comical. For example, a guy the other day held up my writing to show how neat it was when it was literally just a form I filled in with block capitals. I had to try not to laugh.

2. Neurotypical compliments me on something I am wearing but they mean it as a sarcastic insult, e.g. "nice shirt". Just why. Keep your stupid opinions to yourself.

3. Neurotypical compliments me on something I am wearing and it seems genuine but then when I tell then something about the item, e.g. where I got it, their eyes glaze over and I can tell they didn't really mean. Again, just why?

4. I give a neurotypical a genuine compliment and they act weird like am I hitting on them.

No. 1201339

>3. Neurotypical compliments me on something I am wearing and it seems genuine but then when I tell then something about the item, e.g. where I got it, their eyes glaze over and I can tell they didn't really mean. Again, just why?
Just because they complimented you doesn't mean they want to know more of it, they just liked it that's it. It can still be a genuine compliment.

No. 1201342

Female-oriented japanese media and video games have plenty of nerdy women. I'm not sure what creative hobbies have aspies that don't have a lot of males. Probably costume making and such for different fashion communities, but I have zero interest in those.

No. 1201344

I guess that makes sense but it's weird for me. If I like something, I want to know more about it, such as where they got it. Unless their bar for liking things is lower so they compliment things they only like a little bit? Kind of weird but I guess neurotypicals seem to love showering each other in praise and compliments.

I suppose this is why neurotypicals have the cliche reply "oh, this old thing?" and then move on.

No. 1201364

You can't help being on the spectrum, I find it hard to navigate compliments too but to twist these social difficulties around and pretend that it's the 'nts' that are all weird and that you're not the common denominator is not the answer anon.

No. 1201367

They just like it, they do not want to buy it for themselves. It doesn't matter where you got it from, they are not asking you anything.

No. 1201373

Why can't NTs be weird too? Am I not allowed to find anything weird? Fwiw I told my NT bf about the handwriting compliment and he thought it was weird too.

I can accept that perhaps I give compliments strangely (I've stopped doing it because of this) but automatically assuming an ND person must be the weird one in all situations when paired with an NT is just depressing.

No. 1201389

File: 1653832491266.png (60.27 KB, 500x507, autistic-screeching-hi-1305907…)

I hate how zoomers think autism is just being quirky. Autism can come with severe intellectual disability where the person just screams all day. Coming from an Eastern shithole my parents have debated giving me up because I used to act like I was blind when things got overwhelming. I never got a diagnosis and don't think I need one because I spent my whole life reading about what the hell can be wrong with me? And now that people talk about their personal experiences more I could 100% understand myself. Back when I was a child only the most annoying boys would be diagnosed with autism, and all the descriptions were about just how low empathy autistics are which I never felt correct to me. I can socially blend in and my problems are mostly sensory. My body can feel very excruciating but I don't show it, or I must pretend it's something that would make sense to a neurotypical. Fuck getting diagnosed and getting discriminated. Nobody cares about "ableism" here, basically if you are not medically retarded, you have to do your best to blend in.

No. 1201398

Well they are weird for being on a high horse claiming they have a lot of empathy and autists having none, meanwhile they actually have 0 empathy and don't care to understand anyone they deem odd. They claim to be adaptable, but can't adapt to ND people even temporarily. Meanwhile autists have to try our entire lives, despite having problems with it.

No. 1201419

i feel like i must be useful and avoidant or else i'll be left behind and i can never be too much, never be myself.
>be funny
>but not like a clown
>be mysterious
>but not in a sad way
always put more effort into my relationships than they put into relationship with me, but carefully manouver it so they won't just use me. i must go away from time to time and remain somewhat a mystery so they think i am cool. when i am just vegging out or sperging about art.

No. 1201529

Normalize this! This is normal! We are all just smiling for other people’s comfort. Even when I’m smiling for real, once the feeling passed, isn’t it normal to just stop smiling and return to the neutral state. Or do normies have a gradual emotional fade out where their smile uncurls itself slowly, somehow that’s even creepier. I’m not autistic btw.

No. 1201539

I hope I never turn into the type of autist who complains about 'teh neurotypicals' as if they're a different species to me or an evil hive mind that's out to get me and all the 'neurodivergents' like me. It's us versus them and we're secretly the smart ones… ffs lol

Sure I was born a tist but being that level of retarded.. thats a choice. You can opt out of the dumb victim twitter speech at any time.

No. 1201546

KEK same. It’s such high school behavior.

No. 1201612

I'd like to find something more western but maybe I'll just be a cringe white girl who shows up to Japanese interest meetups kek

No. 1201679

No, you're just the type of autist that complains about other autists instead. Just as r*tarded.

No. 1201751

This bothers me SO MUCH.
After learning of my diagnosis therapists will tell me that my social difficulties are down to me having no natural empathy or theory of mind. When I try to anticipate other people’s reactions to things, my first instinct is to imagine what I would do or want in that situation, which is often at odds with what the average person would do or want. Supposedly this is a typical autistic trait and non-autistic people don’t have to project onto others because unlike me, they do have empathy and theory of mind.
In my experience, though, neurotypical people project all the time and usually make no effort to consider different perspectives. Coworkers see me eating lunch alone in the office, apparently think “the only reason to eat lunch alone is that you’re stuck up and hate your coworkers” and proceed to act like I’ve insulted them. In reality I’m eating lunch in the office because the cafeteria is really loud and my brain can only handle so much noise. If 50% of my social issues are due to me projecting the wrong things onto others then the other 50% are due to others projecting the wrong things onto me. Sometimes I feel like neurotypical people only appear to be more empathetic than autistic people because their perception of the world is considered the default.

No. 1201772


You can say slurs here sweetie, we won’t tell.

No. 1201774

Obviously, but I prefer not to.

No. 1201789

>Coworkers see me eating lunch alone in the office, apparently think “the only reason to eat lunch alone is that you’re stuck up and hate your coworkers” and proceed to act like I’ve insulted them.
I get this so much. It doesn't help that I have the weird sperg "posh" accent and I'm an introvert. People project "stuck up" onto me without even speaking to me. Then when I don't want to talk to them because of their poor treatment it's conformation for them that I am stuck up. I can't win. All I want is to eat my lunch in peace but they have start so much drama and then blame me for it.

>Sometimes I feel like neurotypical people only appear to be more empathetic than autistic people because their perception of the world is considered the default.

Completely agree. Both can have deep empathy and both can lack empathy. The fact that autistics are likely to be bullied easily disproves that at neutrotypicals are all empathetic.

No. 1201795

how do people cope with rejection sensitive dysphoria. i don’t know how to do it and it’s starting to make me push away someone who i like. nonas what can i do, my brain is a hellscape

No. 1201798

Did you really come to a thread aimed at allowing autists to vent about neurotypicals to complain that autists are complaining about neurotypicals?

We’ve reached a new level of spergatory.

No. 1201799

i get like this specifically when i spill a drink or can't concentrate because of a loud or specific noise and i'm glad it's almost always in the comfort of my own home becauseit's so FUCKING EMBARRASSINGGGG

No. 1201814

is it rejection sensitive dysphoria for me to feel like an absolutely hated reply guy just because the last 3 friends/ mutuals i've replied to or DM'ed never responded or left me on read all in a row today (they could literally just be busy, or forgot, or they don't place a retarded high value on validation in the form of liking and replying on social media like i do) or am i just genuinely that unfunny, unlikable and unremarkable? and why does my broken brain always have to assume the worst like that? i'm not even that terminally online, so it sucks even more on days like these when i do log on and interact with people and get like nothing back. just makes me want to isolate even more. meanwhile these friends will never have any idea the hoops that i jump through for the most mundane shit, they literally probably jst have busier lives than my loser ass

and YES i copied and pasted my own post from a recent vent/ dumbass shit thread (literally already forgot which one it was even tho i just did it) because i am too lazy and incompetent to relay the same information when i know i already typed it out before lol

No. 1201817

I hope the person who makes the next thread picks something cute and informative next time. I'm very autistic about this current picture, sorry.

No. 1201820

I used to do this in highschool super hard. Idk why.

No. 1201840

I am not diagnosed but it's likely I have autism or some sort of paranoia issue. I feel like I have too much empathy yet none at all. I have learned empathy, so I act like I feel bad even if I do not feel bad about certain events or things. I'm really disconnected from people and everything feels like a weird game, I wish we could just say what we mean. I am way more connected to animals and feel a lot of empathy for them, but I feel like a lot of people are just inherently evil and are out to get me. They all make fun of each other, talk shit, and try to kill each other for little mistakes. It is anxiety inducing that if you don't speak or act a certain way, you're treated like a weirdo even if you genuinely are just trying to mirror everyone else and care about other people. I blend in well enough, but people think I'm an asshole and mean, even though I'm just trying to act normal. I am the complete opposite and don't want anyone to feel bad, so it's fucked up how they judge everyone so harshly. Sorry for rambling, just stressed out with living like this. Social interactions are like a game I can't understand, everything is so cryptic.

No. 1201843

>I have learned empathy
Me too, actually this ties into a question I have: I basically learnt to "be normal" and socialize but being out of college for a time now I see I have reverted to previous autistic behaivors except I'm not as bad as I used to be before I went to college. I learnt to socialize in college and submitted myself to thise "normie" things like parties and dancing and etc but I still didn't feel completely normal. Now I live as an hermit and I have cut contact with my normie friends and feel more "me" but still idk man idk. Anyways when I tried to get diagnosed as an adult they told me "learning" to be a normal person means you aren't autistic because autistic people simply don't learn and never change, they act always like that. I got an adhd diagnosis though. My question is idk is this true? kek

No. 1201844

No, you learned to mask.

No. 1201847

Even if I clearly did things like partying and socializing? I still felt uncomfortable in those but I submitted myself to it because I felt like I was ~so young and missing out~. I basically went all my highschool years basically friendless, alone, and staring at a wall but I normified myself in college and tried to speak to people always.

No. 1201890

I've always been afraid of getting a job, it's honestly not as awful as I expected, but then I'm only working half-time for now. I kinda feel bad for my boss, since we work pretty closely, but I feel like a "catfished" him in my interview. I can pretend to be a very competent normal woman and say whatever I think people want to hear in short bursts, so I totally sweeped him off his legs there, but now I can't keep up the same energy when I'm there 8 hours a day (not full-time though). I can feel that I underreact to a lot of things because I'm lost in my thoughts, don't know how to handle being praised and don't communicate that much. I don't really feel at home, I don't even work their facilities to store food or make coffee, even though on some days an afternoon coffee could really save me as I still just feel like some guest in the office. Sometimes I get lost in my work for the whole workday while they just hang around the office and take long lunch breaks, so I'm trying to make an effort to also let myself be distracted and not seem like a robot. I do work hard and efficiently at least so I get praised often, but I feel that's less important in office setting than being "liked".
I also have zero idea how to get to a good place in my career from here since my networking skills are close to zero, the only place I can do well is very formal and scripted settings, like a job interview.

No. 1201923

everyone keeps repeating that spergs lack a theory of mind but the research doesn't even support that conclusion, NTs can be just as bad, and depending on the test the spergs can do better than the NTs.

As for the no empathy thing, many articles point out that spergs just seem to show empathy differently but obviously if it's not the reaction others are expecting it means we don't have empathy. But the way NTs show empathy always looks insincere to me so idgi. Apparently trying to be helpful or sharing that you had a similar experience is the wrong approach.

>Coworkers see me eating lunch alone in the office, apparently think “the only reason to eat lunch alone is that you’re stuck up and hate your coworkers” and proceed to act like I’ve insulted them.

I get that too

No. 1202037

>It would upset some of my teachers I think who thought I was making faces at them I guess but I was just daydreaming.
Anon, this happened to me so many times in school, you brought back so many memories for me just now

No. 1202088

that's how you imagine it in your black and white thinking autistic mind lmao. when i complain about neurotypicals it's because they bullied me for getting a headache and wanting to take a break. it is because nts bullied me for standing weird, having weird expressions, talking weird. making me feel like i should kill myself because my whole existence is wrong. everything i liked was shat on my whole childhood because i enthusiastically ranted about it. they are the reason i was depressed since age 7. i stopped interacting with people, then the teachers blamed me for being too quiet and withdrawn, which then my mother bullied me for not being a social butterfly (as if that would've worked for me). why is it such a sin to be weird and exist? i am a hard worker, i'm helpful, i don't pester people, i stopped ranting about my "special interests" long ago and don't even have them anymore. they're the reason i was reading DSM books at age 10 trying to find out why everybody hates me. i learned to abandon and mold myself into whatever neurotypicals wanted just to avoid getting physical and verbal abuse. simply because they didn't like my posture or voice. how's that worse from bullying someone until they are suicidal? being an adult now and realizing i was more mature than the norm is not superiority complex or some kind of ego flex. i understand normies are emotion based. i don't believe i'm superior, and i don't have to believe i am inferior. i am just as if not more useful in this day and age of capitalism than the neurotypical… and if they hated me so much for standing weird and whatever, they could have just excluded me instead of abusing me.
your comment is retarded, it's like saying a woman is misandrist because she doesn't like that men abuse and take away women's rights.

No. 1202101

yeah, it can feel like they are conspiring against us. i am not good at taking hints so i take any doubt as a no. how do i deal with it is start talking to a bunch of new people. i will react and reply on new people's stories (i genuinely liked or sparked a thought) until i can't see my left on reads in my messages anymore. if you are on a social media that boosts your posts based on interactions then you can try friend making pages and groups and joining a niche or hobby.

No. 1202109

Thank you. I've always been very confused about this.

I haven't gotten around to getting diagnosis yet but I just feel like I fit this definition far more than I do autism but idk what to do about it. Maybe when i get around to talking to a proper psychologist I will finally get some closure because I am so sick of feeling like an alien and feeling guilty about it.

No. 1202111

by being avoidant

No. 1202123

lmao you're literally emotional as fuck, autists just don't know how to process emotions of other people.

No. 1202215

>>1200169 i think sometimes it makes sense to group them, (ex. this thread) because there are common experiences between them (getting caught as a kid and put in SpEd and thus made an outcast, or going un-diagnosed and think it's your fault for struggling) and they both are developmental disorders that involve some amount of emotional disregulation, social issues, ect.. they aren't the same but i woudn't call them "opposites", but i've got both (well, a diagnosis for both from childhood, but i think it might just be autism-related problems in day to day life getting labelled adhd. but the meds still help so who knows.)
but, i definitely agree that them getting grouped is obnoxious a lot of the time.

No. 1202228

File: 1653875231787.jpg (7.67 KB, 275x275, 1579131788439.jpg)

> can't be my "intense" self and must fake avoidance or else be abandoned

we are the same nona I feel it

No. 1202234

File: 1653875689947.jpg (13.16 KB, 275x275, 1618295422090.jpg)

Do any other autistanonnas suffer from PMDD or other premenstrual issues?

I saw this recently on le reddit
and a whole lot of the past 20 years of my sad sack life make sense now. I thought I was possessed by demons or something.

No. 1202242

different anon but I'm so sick of being looked at like a criminal every time I get my meds filled.

No. 1202254

I definitely do, despite meds I get suicidal before my period, vs other people I know who are just a little sad

No. 1202268

when i was younger i wasn't able to differentiate between sarcastic and genuine compliments. and even though i can now, keeping the same response has helped, at least for me. even if i can tell they are trying to be rude, just smiling and thanking them works, because then they either feel bad about trying to get a dig in at you or realize they arent going to be able to upset you that way.

i think it works sometimes. like if someone compliments something that i made myself, i tell them i made it and they usually think thats neat. i've had some nice conversations about crochet by doing that. i also think it would work if it was say, a piece of jewlery, and you said your partner got it for you. but not so much "i got it at this store" unless they ask.

yeah, me too. like fully suicidal once a month. i had no idea there was a corelation, that explains a lot.

No. 1202297

you should be put back in time to when you were a child and daily yelled at, tugged and swayed around, hit, kicked, punched, threatened, stolen from, humiliated and gaslighted. i would like to see how stoic and happy you are. if you express sadness i will call you pathetic. very normal and fair to experience for every children, right.

No. 1202309

File: 1653882058536.jpg (460.88 KB, 1920x1080, jessica-jones-season-3-4153996…)

sigh. it is lonely but we can at least romanticize it. the last time i showed my sensitive and passionate side to a non-spergy woman i got downgraded instantly. these days it's easier to play the unavailable, and keep my reputation up. swear it's like playing a different video game character for most situations when i try. the things we must do to survive.

No. 1202316

"Neurotypical" is such a stupid fucking word.

No. 1202330

what word are we supposed to use instead?

No. 1202333

seethe, normie
if you study hard enough you can maybe one day out earn the comp sci nerd autist! go normie, go

No. 1202349

No, I didn't have my parents involved despite being 50/50 if I was on the spectrum or not. I had my sister speak with the psychiatrist and did still receive an autism diagnosis because of her assessment and other patterns in my results and behavior fitting the diagnosis. If you are more socially inept or don't mask as well it should be less of a concern having them or not. The more unsure you are, the more you should seriously consider if involving them is an option. My parents don't believe in mental health treatment and care basically (I'm from an Asian family) so involving them was not an option for me.

No. 1202358

I've got ADD, retard. Even I'm allowed to have opinions.

No. 1202366

You know other autistic (or ADHD) women can disagree with you, right? I find the term neurotypical stupid and I wish "non-autistic" would be used, because the term neurodiverse is leading to focus on autism as a difference instead of a disability. We're social animals, it's a disability. It would hopefully cut down on the Tiktok larpers and the label becoming trendy.

For you and any other future thread creators; there are many accomplished autistic women you could have chosen for a thread pic like Temple Grandin or Helen Hoang!

I don't consider this sociopathic. Playing up expressions to communicate more smoothly with other people is not creepy. It's like speaking a different language than your native tongue for work; requires effort and is tiring for extra focus, and becomes a problem when you can't relax and go back to your own language after.

No. 1202427

Has anyone watched the show Love on the Spectrum? It's kind of cringe and I feel like most of the people are spergier than I expected, I guess I forgot many autists are not high functioning expert maskers. I kind of like Kaelynn because she's the only one I relate to, she comes off more weird than outright spergy. But then I remember I'm an autist and maybe she comes off super spergy to normies, which makes me feel bad about myself. Anyway thought it might be interesting to see how anyone else in this thread feels

No. 1202429

The threadpic is so ugly, gawd

No. 1202430

i've already posted in here but now i'm convinced i have autism…
i don't have symptoms like hyper sensitivity to sounds/textures and i don't have meltdowns but there's so much shit that just isn't normal and is a dead giveaway in women…
now what do i even do with this info? it doesn't make me feel any better…

No. 1202436

All you can really do is try to be more self aware and learn about what normies think and do so you can mask better. Or just accept that you are who you are

No. 1202449

File: 1653900678274.jpg (56.85 KB, 902x242, autism_euthanasia.jpg)

I'll stop complaining about NT's when they stop trying to bully autists into committing suicide over the most inane fucking bullshit and act like we're aliens.
After my diagnosis (which was given to me against my will when I reported my father for physical abuse and neglect) I was told that autists don't want or need friends. That I can't have empathy. Basically that I'm the scum of the earth and the psychiatrist asked me literally why I hadn't committed suicide yet. Many of the applications for euthanasia are done by autists, but autists are so fucking horrible and shitty people and need to take up even less space and need to learn to hate themselves even more for daring to be born socially retarded, right? Even too fucking polite to just commit suicide, because someone would have to clean it up or be inconvenienced, so they're trying to do it through the official channels. Child protective services even use it as an excuse and get out of jail free card for parents who want to abuse their children. Even if you're just a mild case of aspergers, it's seen as justified to try to beat your kid to death. Where is all that supposed empathy NT's have? People also change their attitude the moment they find out I'm a sperg. They think I'm just a really good hard worker, who is very thorough, but a bit shy and reserved at times (even though I have no problem having small talk with strangers or doing presentations). The moment they find out I'm a sperg, they act like I'm a retarded baby, so I have to go stealth and just sit there and listen to them complain about coworkers who are spergier than me. Hearing them completely misinterpret and project shit onto them. If I try to carefully suggest that they might be wrong about their interpretation (without mentioning I'm a sperg too), they just look at me with big eyes, like I just told them I like to eat shit.
I've been told the same thing, that I practically pass as NT and "grew out of it", but internally the tism and resentment for being treated like shit is still there.

No. 1202466

Not watched that show but I do think the ambiguousness of “on the spectrum” is a problem. As a late diagnosis, I don’t feel like I really fit in with most autistic people, but I also know I don’t fit in with non-autistics either.

I wish “Aspergers” or “high functioning” or something else was still being used. Not knowing how well I will fit in with groups and activities aimed at people “on the spectrum” has really put me off seeking support at all. I don’t want to feel like I am faking and I feel like I have nothing in common with low functioning people, like it’s a completely different thing.

No. 1202478

same anon but i realize all of my friends are probably high-functioning autistic but with atypical symptoms. or maybe other issues give them autistic traits. they're mostly people who can be "the quirky one" in a group of normies. i can't believe it took me this long to see the truth lmao

i agree. what does a non-verbal adult who spergs out at any little sound have in common with a high-functioning autist anyway?

No. 1202515

Especially considering that a lot of Aspergers type autists often have a higher IQ than average and low functioning will have a lower IQ than average. What are they supposed to do together? I'm afraid that if I went to a general autism event I'd end up having to babysit a lower IQ person or be bored out my brains.

No. 1202525

i’m also late diagnosed, but while looking for an assessment i was coming across all these “signs of autism in women” tiktoks and the sudden large volume of women on the internet sharing their experiences of late diagnosis and it actually convinced me that I DIDN’T have autism because I wasn’t like any of them.

No. 1202555

What sort of things could you not relate to?

No. 1202629

being mature is not a question of having no emotions anon. i never bullied people even if they were cringe and i hated them. at my child age i already thought, if i don't like a bitch.. i can just do my best to avoid them.

No. 1202630

many symptoms of autism or adhd are almost the same as cptsd.

No. 1202748

you're so focused on "bullying". that's not a qualifier of maturity.

No. 1202934

>watch Love on The Spectrum
>''haha wow they're so retarded''
>tfw they're out there going on dates and socializing while i'm rotting away by myself
Guess I'm even retardeder

No. 1202951

Kek I know they're so unapologetically sperg. James really reminds me of Chris chan, and I'm pretty sure his dad is a sperg too

No. 1203263

you misunderstood again. she was explaining why she uses the word neurotypical when complaining about normies. because you assumed it's because she had a superiority complex, whereas it's because in her experience they were abusive.

No. 1203266

this is why i would not go. it would be a disability parade which is not relatable to me. it would be full of men too, who are notoriously bad at socializing to begin with, now add the autism. we are better off joining a hobby group.

No. 1203272

i died when that guy talked about anime, and was picky about dates because of it. then went on a date with two girls, and liked the more normie one, despite her and him having less in common. then he called the second girl on the phone and said he waited for the other's call.

No. 1203294

>then he called the second girl on the phone and said he waited for the other's call.
Even non-autistic men do this.

No. 1203297

It's pretty sad than Aspergers women don't fit in anywhere.

No. 1203303

t. neurotypical sadist

don't try to get through to a neurotypical sadist, she's not misunderstanding, she's just a little cruel psychopath

No. 1203315

You mean non-retarded?

No. 1203353

This is why I (autist too) judge posts that talk about 'the neurotypicals' There's nearly always this ott victim complex attached or its accusatory (normies are cruel and out to get us) just generally unhinged. Scrolling back through the thread.. it's a pattern. You see the word neurotypical used and its guaranteed to be someone with almost male levels of autism. It's like a warning signal that the poster isn't just autistic but has chosen to lean in and become more retarded than even an autism diagnosis would explain.

I'm aware of where anons are probably picking up their language and their talking points from. It's just out of place on here.

No. 1203413

Recently my manager's entire family somehow got dx'd as "on the spectrum", and also I guess decided I have it too. Now HR/management is being REALLY nice to me which is making my coworkers hate my wierd ass even more then they already do. Idk what's next. Will I get some kind of backlash when they all diagnose themselves with something else? Will I get in trouble for making a typo becuse I'm supposed to have detail oriented autistic superpowers?

I know it's because I'm math brained and obviously not normal socially but these people have NO idea. I've been institutionalized and rediagnosed over and over since I was a little kid by people obsessed with identifying and labeling whatever was wrong with me. At this point I do not give a fuck why I'm like this and the omg this explains everything!!!11! reaction to diagnosis/self diagnosis makes my skin crawl and gives me an instant headache. If I went in to get another diagnosis in 2022 they 100% would smack me with ASD just based on my mental health history. Who does that benefit? It's not even treatable. Online pop mental health culture exists because facebook gets the adbux when they can profile you based on if you follow 25 accounts about living with OCD.

No. 1203432

>Watches first episode
>"wow Dani is good at masking even tho she's still a little bit over energetic"
>People think she's weird

It's so disheartening Nonnas. I don't have an official diagnosis but on top of a lot of signs I already display, a lot of the situations in the show are so painfully cringy but relatable. Even my friends once told me in the nicest way possible I'm "peculiar". It's sad to think that no matter how hard I try, I'll never truly blend in, and it's fucked up that people expect it in the first place.

No. 1203488

it's because you come from a privileged place where people are brought up to act civilized. in my poorfag native country bullying is the norm, so no, it is not good to be normal.

No. 1203490

File: 1653976192896.jpg (42.66 KB, 612x459, funny-cat-laughing-picture-id5…)

she is definitely a sperg, being so focused on one word. but what did i expect when i came to rant (not expressing everything completely literally and with 0 emotion) in an autism thread. we should be using tone indicators here

No. 1203494

File: 1653976449302.png (4.9 KB, 72x72, 1f9cd-200d-2642-fe0f-122475625…)

true, sadly.
a correction to add, i remember the girl called him, and i think he called the first one. it was so cringe worthy. damn, he should have been happy she gave him a chance. he went out of his way to call her the second option.

No. 1203503

File: 1653977158027.png (288.4 KB, 1510x1416, 9c46745Mi-3782546834.png)

with the highly competitive school system, lack of resources and prevalent alcoholism of my country, it is not rare that (male) teenagers beat a nerd to death, or for the girls to torment the weird and shy ones until they drop out or kill themselves. there are no rules for teenagers under 18, like they might go to juvie for criminal behaviour but only straight up provable attempted murder gets them a criminal record.
and trust me the bullying wasn't justified besides "that person looks weak and off-putting". autists, fat kids, very skinny ones, dark skin kids, shy ones, ugly ones, pimply ones, awkward ones all got the shit end of the stick. girls pulled out chunks of somebody's hair because she was "a gypsy", another girl got a brick thrown at her head by an adhd boy because she was small. yeah that boy beat smaller kids because "they went further away" when he pushed them. and the normie teachers just gave that girl with a bleeding head a tissue and told her to sit down.

No. 1203511

>you have to come with references from other people too
yeah, they want to merge friend groups? or are afraid that we might become clingy and "bring down" their value. i avoid talking about my day to day life, make up stuff, and just try to make it a positive and exciting hang out. go back to my private life for a while, come back out, do it again.

No. 1203514

File: 1653978257704.png (277.42 KB, 760x1355, Screenshot_20220531-081810.png)

Not liking bullying = immature? 70% of bullying in the workplace comes from managers and everyone gets to deal with that. Is the person who doesn't enjoy bullying immature, or is it the person who reached adulthood and decided that this manner of conduct in a professional environment is completely acceptable the immature one? Is it immature to not enjoy sexual harassment either or racial discrimination? Or do you first have to interrogate a woman about her neuroses and decide whether she deserves empathy or victim blaming based on that? Maybe you should personally contact judges and professors to tell them how you feel about caring about bullying, if you know it so much better than everyone else. Oh wait, I'm sure you can find more misogynists and racists with 0 empathy who agree with you, sadly enough.

No. 1203538

always embarrassing when adults bully. we all feel like shit at work sometimes yet most of us are able to keep it in.

No. 1203586

Wtf country is this? Italy?

No. 1203589

File: 1653988930972.jpeg (1.16 MB, 1242x1568, 9A86F808-2A51-4389-A3E7-85A51F…)

tbf the recent boom in "my life as an autistic woman" content would probably make me feel like I'm not like them if I watched it.
maybe not all of them are faking it but some of them still seem super alien to me and are often extremely performatively feminine and self-conscious, look and act normie, etc.
I don't know what I'm trying to communicate here but I don't think any online "autism content" is relatable for me

No. 1203592

i'm not super familiar with autistic tiktok content since it hasn't appeared on my fyp but given the most popular accounts have learned to emulate tiktok fashion trends, i can see how a lolcow dweller or a woman over the age of 25 would feel alienated. tiktok even encourages people to emulate gestures and speech so these women/girls learned to mask with entirely different social standards.
also it's pretty funny to see autists emulate tiktok gestures irl kek

No. 1203608

This girl is so annoying even seeing a still frame of her makes me seethe

No. 1203735

i am a bit autistic and i like spergy men because they can understand my intense interests and need for alone time. however i have been crushing on a guy who is mostly non verbal, and while he is very calming to be around, i can't be sure of him if he barely talks. he is not talkative through social media either so i'm not sure what i could do to make him open up more. can someone give me advice on this?

No. 1203754

I hate this stereotype that autistic people are all STEM geniuses or savants in one field. I've jumped around so many jobs throughout my life due to bullying and being unable to mask long term around normie coworkers. For me a job is just another paycheck until I burn out and find another job. This confuses NTs who say I should be more aspirational and try to get more degrees or find my true "passion". I learned I need to have a safe environment where I won't be targeted. It sucks because I am smart but I haven't found a job where I can be judged on my merit and not how well I perform in office politics

No. 1203757

I'm not on tiktok but lately stuff like that is popping up more on insta. If I were to base my view of female tism on what I've seen there.. we should all be ABDLers living amongst hoards of toys and cushions and stimmy toys. Makes me want to keep my diagnosis very close to my chest.

I have a job and a mortgage and apart from the lack of a social life I'm not that odd

No. 1203761

>now what do i even do with this info?
If meltdowns are your big issue the good thing about diagnosis is you have context clues about how to prevent them.
Learning about executive function was a game changer for me.
I used to think my meltdowns were random and everything became just too much in a split second. But now I know there are little warning signs that one is coming on. Like if I have to force myself to shower in the morning or I skip my shower, if my memory gets worse, etc. It's a sign something is weighing on me and my executive function is deteriorating. Sometimes it's hormones so I just wait it out, other times it's sleep deprivation or a stressful thing I've been avoiding weighing on me.
Self care isn't a meme it's genuinely as important as medication. If you address small stresses you can prevent a full on meltdown.
Another positive part of this self awareness is knowing some things don't fit you and never will. Like I wasted so much money on gym memberships. Only after diagnosis did I realise that gyms are hell for me from a sensory perspective, so I commited to buying workout equipment for home instead of just trying to be disciplined and go to gym like everyone else.

No. 1203797

Why does he need to open up? He seems happy that way. No need to change him.

No. 1203830

because how else would i know if i actually like him and not just what i assume he is like based on how we vibe

No. 1203833

You obviously already don't like "what he's like" because what he's like is silent.

No. 1203839

huh? no, i like it, that's partly why he is so chill. but also, what could he be hiding, you know?

No. 1203844

nayrt but i get what you mean, anon. actively trying to get him to open up could make him overwhelmed though. maybe you can be careful with the way you approach this and hope he opens up more as time passes.

No. 1203846


it’s so weird. i feel like its also just very surface level stuff? like they never bring up any of the possible symptoms that would actually be considered ”disabled”. reminds me of the whole tumblr depression era

No. 1203863

nta but this is a very helpful and well written post, thank you. It made me realize I have some of those warning signs too but was ignoring them.

No. 1203948

File: 1654013787971.jpg (198.48 KB, 2000x1333, FT7Rs9vWUAIP.jpg)

Do neurotypical people often seem arbitrary and amoral to anyone else?

No. 1203966

Yes, being very honest and following rules strictly is an autism trait.

I find it pretty irritating how non-autistics complain about people cheating or whatever and then go and do it themselves in another situation. It's like they are unable to see the big picture that things get ruined because everyone behaves the way they do (tragedy of the commons).

No. 1203977

I’m not a zoomer and have never used tiktok, what on earth are tiktok gestures?

No. 1203983

File: 1654015052872.jpg (55.02 KB, 1000x1000, st,small,845x845-pad,1000x1000…)

this shit, among others.

No. 1204007

Aw, I'm glad it helped anon ♥

No. 1204035

You should think twice about a STEM career. I didn't choose engineering because of autism, but I'm really happy I went down that path because I work alone most of the time, I've gotten noticed for my work and not office politics, and most of my coworkers aren't really normies themselves. I'd be alot worse off if I had to work in a normietypical setting, especially one full of women. Engineering requires a degree but maybe you can sit down and try to learn some coding? Yes this is the most annoying advice ever but you really should consider it

No. 1204083

NTA, but I don't really get the "just learn to code" advice most of the time, because I feel sitting down and learning a programing language won't really get me far when it comes to actually getting a job. Also I've heard that the IT sector itself is getting fucked by human management systems (daily check-ins, standups, etc.) and requirements of "soft skills" and such.

No. 1204103

After you learn a language you should create a project and then put it on your resume, and then apply to a lot of companies. The first job probably won't be great but once you get a job you can hop to a better job after a year. You could also get some certificates, do a boot camp or get a bachelors but that all costs money. There may be resources online for helping people break into CS especially if you're a woman, lgbt or not white/asian. Idk it's alot of time and effort but others have broken into CS from irrelevant fields so it's possible.

As to the second point, those things really aren't a big deal, I do them at work and it's fine. The soft skills thing is just that companies want to hire people who aren't unpleasant to be around and can work with others, since CS can attract people that are smart but have assholish personalities. Just be nice to your coworkers, pretend to be positive and do what you're told and you'll be fine

No. 1204278

I tried that many times, even had a coming job at one point and it was horrible. learning coding is not for everyone and it takes so much time of persistent study to be viable.

No. 1204289

Learn coding is a meme.

No. 1204370

Just because it's not for everyone doesn't make it a meme. Look, aspies will always get pushed out of normie environments unless they either mask constantly until they're too burnt out to work, or they enter an environment that actually values skills over how fun you are to talk to. Or you could make your own business. None of these paths are easy. At least in CS if you grind your way into that first job, in a couple years you can be working from home making 6 figures without being overworked

No. 1204376

You're right, it can be good for some people. I meant more how it is given as blanket advice to everyone without considering that person's individual strengths and weaknesses.

No. 1204391

There’s also audio transcription, admin level work, and accounting work from home style jobs with limited social. Just to throw it out there while I’m scrolling.

No. 1205316

Yes, very much so. Reminds me of the quote "if you have morals and you do not follow them, then you do not have morals"

No. 1205379

Yo Samdy Sam's videos helped me a lot in identifying signs, but it's sad to see her being a handmaiden for troons here. I agree that women can absolutely relate to male autism more than how it occurs in females, and it's not always so black and white. But to imply that MTF troons experience female autism symptoms is so wrong. They're as male brained autistic as they come.

No. 1205389

They're literally trans because of their male autistic brain kek.

No. 1205399

There's an interesting discussion to be had about autism and transness in regards to women.. and this isn't it. How about asking why troon rates are so high in tists compared to others? The amount of autistic women who feel like NBs is nuts.

I'm a not very feminine and I was only diagnosed at like 30. Before that I've had moments where I almost fell into the thinking trap of 'I don't fit in with girls so I must not be one' I think that's why rates are so stupidly high with us. That feeling of not fitting in (from tism) gets blown into something else that's much bigger than it needs to be. But nobody wants to say that because it's not very 'validating' to acknowledge when people are just socially struggling and confused.

Male tranny tists are just perverts tho with a hint of social confusion thrown in.

No. 1205407

I wonder about TIM/MTF autism a lot honestly, it seems contradictory to me. Going off stereotypes you'd think that the super logical brain wouldn't buy into the pseudospiritual explanation of gender nowadays or that feelings=actual being a woman. I will see cold as ice programmers who have no room for nuance in most things falling for this stuff. You'd think they would look at chromosomes, look at the differences in male and female biology, and think about their lack of early childhood feminine behaviors, and take that to heart instead of joining the make-believe gender cult.
I guess it's all overrode by them taking fetishes too far, or the black and white thinking that euphoric fetish feelings of being a woman equals actually being one. Let's not forget their shit understanding at aesthetics and think that long hair=girl, boobs=girl, feminine clothes=girl, but that facial and body proportions mean absolutely nothing.

No. 1205422

That's because people fall for the rainman autism-is-a-superpower meme. Autists aren't logical, they have black and white thinking patterns

No. 1205430

Logical thinking doesn't necessarily equate to the rainman stereotypes though. In fact isn't the rainman stereotype low intelligence but being insanely good at just one thing? I'm talking more about being a thinker than a feeler, relying more on facts than feelings. Even with black and white thinking patterns you'd think they'd look at something like chromosomes and think XY= male, XX= female, no exceptions.

No. 1205468

File: 1654094819281.jpg (44.64 KB, 539x742, DKQmOkAUEAA_rZg.jpg)

>I'm talking more about being a thinker than a feeler, relying more on facts than feelings.
Problem is most men who think they're "facts over feelings" aren't actually logical, they just accept their subjective feelings as 'factual logic' and run with it. I think the autistic MTF thought process is something like:
>Women are XX
>I feel like a woman inside even though I'm XY
>I am Factual and Logical ergo it must be possible to be factually and logically an XY woman

Then they work backwards from their "I'm a real woman" conclusion to find facts that support it, just like a typical annoying contrarian nerd. WELL ACKSHYTULY cuttlefish can change sex so biological sex doesn't real. WELL ACTLKLY the dictionary was written by humans so all words are technically social constructs. WELL ACUTELY a penis and clits are both merely random clumps of cells we have socially assigned meaning to therefore I just have a big clitty. WELL ACKTULU the world doesn't literally leap anywhere so there's no such thing as a leap year.

AGPs have the exact same personality type as the autist I went to high school with who would interrupt every teacher at least once per class with some stupid WELL ACTUALLY technicality.

No. 1205505

Kek that's a good example nonna, I see your point. I guess that goes back to my "if I grow out my hair, wear anime clothes, and get bolt-ons then I'm a woman" example too in how they just use it as a major cope while ignoring everything else.

No. 1211524

No. 1212316

Nta but this makes sense to me. I feel like whenever I do something selfish, it's not a deliberate choice and more like it doesn't occur to me to consider another viewpoint or I didn't understand the situation properly.

When I do consider all viewpoints, I am extra generous and try to see the good in all people. Unfortunately this means being repeatedly taken advantage of, to the point that I now avoid all other people.

I don't understand why neurotypical people cheat and lie to get ahead. Surely they must know that their "success" is fake and it wouldn't feel as good? Plus the people they screwed over to get there weighing in their conscience, preventing them from enjoying it. Except I guess that's what separates us. Neurotypicals don't feel this, or not as much anyway.

It's kind of sad to think that the people who are held highest in our societies are the ones who are the best at playing the game.

No. 1212328

I dont know if this is a real tweet or not but Neil degree tyson is the most annoying fucking moid to me.

No. 1212407

Any other spergs get accused of being on drugs? I've been asked many times if I'm high or if I've taken anything. Got told I "look lost". And when doctors ask me about drug use and I say none, twice they've gone "are you sure?"

No. 1212409

Also I've been told I have a stoner personality but I've never smoked weed. Maybe it's because I don't react much on the outside or act as lively as people want to?

No. 1212434

A bit depressing but it's been at least a year and a half that I have been thinking about what I shall do if I can't get a stable job. I have asperger and it's been 2 year that I am in university studying what I love but it only has shown how inadapted to society I am. I had to re do my first year and I'm exautsed by even the simplest day of school.
My brain is so rotten and miserable that I might have to choose assisted living if I can't find a job I can keep that don't burn me out. It seem more simple to me with my shit mental health that never got really better. I probably will have to do art like artist in mental facility such as Kusama Yayoi to be able to pay the rent. Idk if I'm the only one but it's a thing I think about a lot.

No. 1212450

yes! i have been asked if im high multiple times, sometimes as a joke(?). my mom said it might be because when im not actively trying to show emotions in a socially acceptable way in my face, i apparently look very spaced out and confused. i also am bad with eye contact so maybe that is a part of it. i think part of it is if you are not expressive with your facial gestures.

No. 1212624

I’m the artist who made the op drawing, I am sorry, I am an autistic girl and the creator asked me to draw ashbie but now I’m really not starting to like the character anymore due to how the creator has acted with the cospalayer I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make people angry I will not draw her anymore she is just a fetishised autistic girl for sick men to enjoy and consume and I regret it all I’m sick of it and how people treat autism in girls

No. 1212636

No need to apologize nona it's not your fault that men are gross, it's a nice drawing. The character is cute it's just that men ruin it by sexualizing the innocent/childish part of her persona.

No. 1212641

>i apparently look very spaced out and confused
I see this look in some aspies. I don't understand how/why that "look".. develops? Sometimes I'll be in public and suddenly realize oh god I'm holding a weird facial expression right now. Or like..fuck, I'm holding my eyes up really wide.

When you appear confused, do you FEEL confused yourself?

No. 1212700

yeah i notice my eyes tend to go very "wide" as well. honestly, i do feel confused a lot but even if i dont i think that expression comes to my face without me noticing. if im in a social setting i tend to try to force my face to be more neutral and fake certain facial gestures because i dont want to appear like a weirdo

No. 1212743

me too. somebody in my class told me i had a "resting high face". i dont think he was trying to be really mean because he said that he has the same. but idk i felt bad, i dont want people thinking i do drugs or the type to do so.

No. 1213693

Anyone catch the new Young Justice Episode, so they depicted a character whose whole thing was that he had massive rage issues, cause he was the son of Darkseid(a death godking) and in YJ they had that be allegory for having autism/being mentally ill, I don’t about you all but I don't appreciate autism being compared to “a darkness that must be controlled” or in any way equivocated to evil.
like one of the main characters gives a whole speech that just stank of some of the worst neaurotypical false ally BS.

Whoever on YJ wrote that should feel ashamed

No. 1213698

for anyone thinking that I'm just reaching, I swear to you I'm not, this season is supposed to be about "real issues" in the world and they had a character dealing with her autistic child in the beginning of the episode

No. 1213788

Anon I'm sorry for not contacting you first to use it. I personally think your art is cute and the hate towards it was just because of outrage of the subject matter. I hope the comments didn't bring you down. Again it's not your fault that people fetishize her

No. 1213835

I remember getting called "owl eyes" when I was younger and people would always just tell me I looked scared when I wasn't. And one time some scrote told me I looked like I just found out my dog died

No. 1213887

Not an autist but damn, is that what it’s really like?

No. 1214060

wtf they literally shove a lighted box in his face to try to calm him down? like those parents who raise their kids on tablets instead of learning how to actually soothe their children?
okay i'm halfway in to this one and she barely even looked for the hat? Why didn't she just ask her kid to find it? He clearly knows where things are supposed to go so he probably remembers where his own hat is. And she's feeding him cookies to distract him from distress over his hat, is this what "autism parents" do nowadays? Please tell me this isn't standard, anons. That poor child doesn't even exist and I already feel bad for him.
You're right. Whoever wrote this should be ashamed.

No. 1214226

you think that's bad, the worst part is the faux-motivational speech the writers had to to include, probably just to pat themselves on the back about how great allies they are, about how mentally people are so brave and strong for fighting our "inner darkness" everyday, also out of the all characters to depict as autistic coded, did they have to choose the guy whose the literal son of chaos incarnate and struggles with his inner desire to go on a rampage and fight and kill everybody

No. 1214252

Well that's enough cringe for the morning, wowiee me. It's like they don't know that autistic people are more likely to be victims of violence rather than perpetrators. Oh wait, they might actually not know that damn.

No. 1214294

File: 1654544011440.jpg (223.76 KB, 1536x2048, 525.jpg)

tbf autistic people(its mostly men) like this do exist, they are super rare, likely about 1% of autistic men I'd say but they exist, I know two IRL, one is my cousin and the other is friend of a friend
both are autistic men who are very buff and try to deal with life by trying put on a stoic emotionless front, but when they lose control it can be frightening, my cousin has never hurt anybody but when he loses control he starts biting his shirt and just runs away and starts punching brick walls and trees and he's 6'2 and a very physically capable man, he can rip tree bark with his bare hands and break bricks, he only returns to normal when he tires him self out and his rage dies down, it can be scary but again these types of autistic men are rare

picrel is not my cousin but he is autistic Dragon Ball Z youtuber who gets into a lot of arguments online about who can goku could beat in a fight

No. 1214358

perfect bf

No. 1214397

are you talking about my cousin or the autistic dragon ball z yotuber in the pic, cause this is him, I only watch cause his rants are entertaining

No. 1214399

he's just like me

No. 1214406

well seththeprogrammer is pretty well known in shonen fandom spaces for he genuine autism over "who would win" scenarios

No. 1214435

I think I'm the female version of that type of 'tism.

No. 1214457

File: 1654550241412.gif (134.3 KB, 500x702, aaaaa.gif)

I want to make progress on my project but I'm at my limit for learning new things today, I CANNOT watch any more video tutorials but since I'm hyperfocused on the project and I feel stuck and blocked I can't relax and do any other hobbies so I just have to sit here and vibrate AHHHHHHHHHH

No. 1214782

more shows should expose the reality of caring for a autistic child i.e. it's fucking terrible, and ultimately a waste of time

No. 1219148

Autism nonnies, do any of you feel really hopeless about gender/trans stuff? Most of my fellow autismos seem to be drinking the gender koolaid, and because of my own 'tism I feel like I just can't lie about my own acceptance of it. It would be so much easier if I could just pretend to be okay with enby and trans people, but I am a terrible liar and I hate faking enthusiasm or interest in things I dislike. Additionally, all the pronoun stuff confuses me on a regular basis. I'm terrible at remembering people's names let alone what flavor of pronoun they want to use for the week.

I feel hopeless because I know I'm not going to be able to pretend to care about gender stuff or pronouns and I'm going to ostracize myself from communities I'm in by accident. Is anyone else in my same boat? Or can you pretend better than me? kek

No. 1219529

File: 1654847145182.jpg (294.49 KB, 1080x714, Screenshot_20220610-094320_Twi…)

i always told myself i wasn't autistic because I didn't handflap but now I realize that chewing my pens until they're unusable and biting my nails all the time is probably a stim. now I'm a little better at keeping pens and I did have a period of my life where I didn't bite my nails but now they're little nubs again lmao

No. 1219536

STARING AT OBJECTS makes you autistic now?

No. 1219546

No. 1219563

yeah that one's weird. who's out there staring at objects so hard it's a stim?

No. 1219597

I always hear about a lot of people on the spectrum being labelled as gifted from a young age but was anyone else labelled as stupid?

I have abusive parents and went to a bottom tier school. I never spoke and so was put in the bottom group for everything at school, basically ignored by teachers as I was well behaved (terrified of doing anything wrong). I did gradually move up the top groups for everything at the end of primary school, was about ~5 in year in high school, plus accepted to Mensa (had to do the whole application process myself) so I know I’m not stupid.

However, like many gifted or neurodiverse people, I did badly in my exams and ended up going to a terrible university too, forced by my parents to study something that they thought had good job opportunities, instead of something I cared about.

It’s only in the last few years that I’ve been able to live in a stress free environment and I’ve found that I’m able to learn nearly everything pretty quickly and without much effort when I’m able to choose the learning style. I’ve done some distance university courses and received top marks in everything. I finally got a diagnosis too after recognising the symptoms and pursuing it myself.

Now I can’t help but be resentful of other people who had supportive parents, a good school, extracurricular activity opportunities, early diagnosis, good learning environments, etc. I know I’m still reasonably young and can study as a mature student but I can’t get back all the wasted years, remove all the unhappy memories from my head, erase past failures, nor remove the deep-set feeling that I’m “stupid”.

Did anyone else go through anything similar?

No. 1219789

Same anon. I did some reading and I think I probably qualify as "gifted but learning disabled". Being mute, overlooked, socially awkward but masking, and a bit spacey at school and then having uninterested parents at home is likely why no one noticed. Doing badly in exams probably confirmed what everyone thought.

On the flip side, after reading about gifted children who were recognized, it seems like a lot of them burn out, suffer depression, and don't end up achieving much. The label of being "gifted" seems to do a lot of harm, especially when they come up against other smart people. They also seem to struggle outside of school as they need to motivate themselves.

I guess I'm lucky that I never had that. I'm also fortunate that I have full control over what and how I learn now, as well as plenty of motivation, so I doubt I will crash and burn.

No. 1219847

Sorta kinda? Except I always did ok in school. But after my emotional issues and suspected tism came to surface in late elementary school I got put into special education, so I got bullied for being an alleged retard even though I had no intellectual disability and was in normal classes with no difficulty leading up to it. I was average to high average on the IQ tests I had to take then but I certainly wasn't MENSA level. I also just kept my head down and did my work like a drone, didn't wanna do anything wrong, but never really put out extra energy. So I came out of high school as an A/B+ student, but didn't bother with extracurriculars, AP classes, college dick-sucking, and didn't attend right away due to lack of confidence and burnout.

Funny thing too is after all these years, kids I graduated with still thought I was a tard. You know, despite being in mainstream classes, not needing a help helper, and knowing stuff. The just looked at the short-lived special ed saga in elementary school plus my social awkwardness and thought I was a dumb-dumb. Special ed is a scarlet letter you cannot erase, even if your learning is fine. I developed a major inferiority complex thanks to it so I always get really defensive if I perceive others as treating me like a tard or have breakdowns if I can't get something right away, because I'll think it was proof I actually was.

No. 1219908

>I always get really defensive if I perceive others as treating me like a tard or have breakdowns if I can't get something right away, because I'll think it was proof I actually was.
I can definitely relate to this. Sometimes I overlook visual things that are obvious to others or I read a different meaning into instructions and I often find people treat me like I'm a complete idiot because of it. I really have to control myself so I don't have a meltdown. I also find it frustrating too when I can't pick up something straight away. I guess the feeling of being "stupid" never completely goes away.

No. 1220922

i dont know if I have asperger or am otherwise high functioning. theres definitely something wrong about me and i wish i had a word for it first time in my life

No. 1224475

As an aspie I absolutely despise when I’m scrolling through social media and I see some dumbass post about autism pop up. And it’s always the “oh I’m so special and cool I hate neurotypicals so much” types of posts. Like 1) pls stop reminding me I have autism. 2) you’re not special or cool and this is a dumb post. Like one time I saw a post that was like “being too honest with people is not rude!!!!1!” (Exact wording) Like I get that some autistic people have a hard time with stuff like that but if you think of it that way, you’re not even trying. It’s probably the same tards who cry about someone looking at them wrong and get offended over every little fucking thing. If I replied “this is a bad take” they’d definitely piss their pants. Hypocrites. I like this site because most of the autists on here arent like that.

No. 1224486

Are you medically mute or selectively mute? Selective mute here. I just wanted to say that its nice to see you.

Most sel mute people I see online are younger kids who just don't talk as much if their friends are absent and that's just not the same.

No. 1224503

NTA but I’m an autist who’s selective mute. It’s the most isolating shit ever.

No. 1224556

Nice to meet you. it is really isolating. I tried learning ASL for a while but I'm not deaf so I'm not comfortable treading there. Writing things down isn't conducive.

To be honest, pic rel made me feel a bit better about being selectively mute (in my 30s and have been since a kid for ref) but communication isn't my strong suit and i didnt feel listened to, among other things so I just decided to…stop talking.

I hope that it's a little less isolating for you if that isn't an empty hope.

Downside is that the sound of myself talking at length gives me a headache.

blog post but, I hope you're well. Take care.

No. 1224563

Can't seem to post a pic. Tried to post Link from botw/loz series

No. 1224566

I learned basic ASL, but even knowing it no one else ever cares enough to learn or use it either. They’d prefer you to talk and if not I guess you’re seen as difficult.
I get the feeling of not being listened too. I used to stutter when upset or uncomfortable and get very record scratchy like my brain would get stuck. People got more upset and forcing myself to talk never made the situation better and always led to me burning out so I just sort of stopped? And now I can’t.
I hope you’re doing well too anon.

No. 1224579

I understand that really well..I would just start repeating myself of my thoughts would get stuck like you described and be unable to make any new thoughts. The more others became upset with me the worse it got.

I sympathize with the ASL too. one person tried to learn it with me but they gave up soon after. I don't blame them, but there's no point knowing if not for communicating.

I wish you a lot of luck. People are really misunderstanding about things like this.

No. 1224721

The image reeks of social media bs and is a massive oversimplification. It's true that a lot of autist don't realize they're stimming, but these kinds of posts makes it seem like any normie quirk is actually a form of autistic stimming. The best way to think about it imo is "would a lowest-functioning autist do this to express happiness or relieve stress". Would they jump around and flap their hands, uncontrollably, because they're happy - then yes that sounds like stimming. Would they rock on the floor to calm down - yes that wounds like stimming. Would they play the new catchy Ariana Grande song on repeat while doing homework for a few hours - no that's normie shit that half the population does.

I strongly oppose any kind of self-stimulation being rebranded as (autistic) stimming. Every person on earth self-stimulates in some way. It does nothing but remove understanding of autists. People on tiktok seriously think autists can try out stims or switch them around or try little stim toys to stim with.

No. 1224764

I was selectively mute. I’m not like that anymore though.

No. 1224821

i started going to a psychologist affiliated with my university a while ago for an unrelated issue, but during our second conversation he said that he thinks i might have autism. i basically had a meltdown about it, since i had never thought of myself in that way, i always just thought i was retarded and people didn't like me. i also thought that social interaction was equally hard for everyone but some people had just learned how to deal with it better in some way and i was retarded for just not getting it and getting overly stressed out.

i can't get an official diagnosis from this psychologist, does anyone here recommend getting a diagnosis? is it useful in any way?

No. 1224842

It's been helpful for me, my job is legally required to make adjustments for me if I need it since it's a disability (I don't need that much though). I think if you don't have one it makes people uncomfortable when you're suddenly acting weird or rude for no reason, but if they know about your diagnosis it's like "oh she's just doing an autism thing again". You don't have to disclose it to people though, but when there's a situation where it's useful (like my job) it's better to have one.

No. 1224859

>people didn't like me
it's useful for this since we can often be victims of bullying just for being a bit weird

>he said that he thinks i might have autism

>i basically had a meltdown
sorry but this made me lol

No. 1224923

Same nonnie. It's always "late diagnosed" or self-identifying normies who do this too. I think they're overcompensating because they clearly don't have autism or it's barely perceptible. They always parrot the same basic stereotypes (which are based on men) and act like those are the defining traits of autism and no autistic people deviate from them.

No. 1225248

is it possible to be in psychiatry on and off for over a decade and have undiagnosed autism? i’ve been seeing therapists for a long time so i’ve wondered if i have practically every mental disorder at some point, but i have a feeling i might be autistic. i have always felt like i’m different than everyone i meet in some way, but that could be because of my background and untraditional family. i’ve also been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, adhd, pstd, rad, mdd with mixed features, and probably something else that i’m forgetting. i also think that my early childhood trauma could be the sole reason i am the way i am, although i probably inherited some kind of disorder from one of my parents. i’m kinda agoraphobic and have a fear of being rejected/humiliated by others, but i’m good at pretending like social interactions are easy for me, and sometimes they are. i obsess over things like bands, characters, tv shows and sometimes the hyper fixation lasts for a while, but i always end up mostly getting over it and finding something else to think about all the time. i have trouble making and keeping friends, but i was neglected when i was really young so that could be the cause. i’m pretty quiet, my mood changes constantly throughout the day, and i have outbursts of anger occasionally (usually only when i’m alone). plus the only social medias i use these days are tumblr and lolcow lol. i’m not asking for a diagnosis, i am just confused as to why no psychiatrist or therapist has ever considered that i could have asd. like, maybe i do have asperger’s and i’m just really good at masking? might i benefit from getting tested?

No. 1225299

>was anyone else labelled as stupid?
At the start, yeah, I was thought of as slow and always coming in behind everyone on things and was not able to get along with others. Eventually I got the hang of doing things the way it was expected and then my grades and stuff improved from there until they were passable and then good. It was largely like idk the procedure of it all I struggled with more than the actual coursework but my earliest teachers definitely just interpreted it as me being dumb and slow.

No. 1225327

>is it possible to be in psychiatry on and off for over a decade and have undiagnosed autism? i’ve been seeing therapists for a long time
Have you seen an actual psychiatrist who is experienced in diagnosing autism women? If not, then it's very possible that whoever you have seen might not have realized it.

>i’ve also been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, adhd, pstd, rad, mdd with mixed features, and probably something else that i’m forgetting.

It's common for autistic women to be diagnosed with other things first, especially depression.

From what you've said, I think it's worth seeking an assessment.

No. 1225660

I'm very sad because whenever I share interests with others, I am always the one who's too into it. I don't blame anyone for this at all, and I've learned very well not to go on excited spergs about things. it's not about showing off facts though, I just love things a lot and I want to learn what others love too. I love to just listen, too.

Unfortunately one of my biggest interests is old games and talking to males who are as into games as I am is not…enjoyable. If they were chill and just passionately loved a series (not shipping or Fandom just cool facts, behind the scenes/developmental things, file dump related info, etc)instead of trying to out-fan everyone else it would actually be OK. But even those just don't care that much about the things.

A lot of the series are male targeted so it's also not that. I just love certain things so much yet hate sperging at relatively uninterested or interested but just-listening friends because I don't want to trap them with it or seem like showing off.

I can and do enjoy these things by myself, but in the most friendly, benign, and opposite to the usual meaning way– I just want someone on my same level.

I feel so stupid sometimes.

No. 1225701

Has anyone developed a fear or hatred of the mentally challenged from being lumped into them due to autism? Or the fear and disdain for male autists? I know it's bad of me but I cannot stand being around the severely mentally disabled. I feel bad and they didn't choose the way they are, much like myself, but I probably have internalized hatred just from being considered a retard my whole life

No. 1225716

be my friend, nonna

No. 1226148

Someone needs to make an app for connecting people who want to sperg about the same thing.

No. 1226150

Kind of. I’m late diagnosed so I’ve always considered autistic and disabled people as “other” because society does. I guess some sort of internalized ablism. Not that I say anything like this or dislike them, it’s more of a gut instinct. Even people who are slightly awkward when I can tell it’s probably autism.

It’s weird recognizing these things in other people and I can tell when I do something similar by the other person’s reaction but I’m not able to tell in advance that I’m about to do something weird. It’s like I can only learn what is weird or not from see other people’s reactions and remembering them for next time a similar situation comes up. Of course I probably miss lots of smaller reactions or hints.

Despite that, my brain is used to being classed as “normal” so doesn’t really sympathize with others on the spectrum or disabled who do the same things.

No. 1226430

I would like to be your friend

No. 1226446

I’m diagnosed and definitely autistic. I stim in a lot of ways. I self stimulate with music, but it’s not like wooo this song is amazing.
It’s if I listen to anything that is not this song on repeat for the next several hours. My brain is going to be overwhelmed by audio cues and I’m going to melt down. I need the same beat, rhythm and words. It’s even worse when I can’t figure out which song will help me physical stim and start soothing, but from explaining it’s probably a poor coping strategy to cause stimming when I get overwhelmed and can’t unmask. Then a general stim, maybe it’s something I’ll bring up in discussion offline.
I want to be your friend too anon. You seem cool.

No. 1226451

I do the music thing too. I can't help but wonder if I used to present more externally with flappy stims and loud meltdowns but was beaten into being more internal as a child. All my meltdowns these days are internal or I have shutdowns.

Song related is one of my favorite stim songs, though not a normal favorite of mine, if that makes sense. Something about the beat at the start is very ordered and calming.

No. 1226576

File: 1655315715953.jpg (115.27 KB, 1300x942, sad-depressed-alcoholic-drunk-…)

Anyone other autistics turn to drugs or alcohol when they fuck up socially? I get high as shit and my autistic friend gets drunk by herself. It's so overwhelming making social mistakes all the time. Not small ones either but extremely awkward stuff. I get so overwhelmed and anxious I can't handle it. About to get high right now. I said something incredibly embarrassing and dumb and feel like stabbing myself in the stomach. I never learn from the mistakes, they just happen over and over. I wish I wasn't aware of how retarded I am. I watched Of Herbs and Altars' recent video and I think she mentioned it's common.

No. 1226582

I used to back in school, but swung hard the other way as an adult. There used to be more noticeable difference between me and other sped kids because my developmental delays weren't obvious enough to be diagnosed until mid-primary school. And so many of them had the same voice, this sort of weird rasp that only severely mentally disabled people seem to have? So many of the "challenged" kids at my school had that voice and I hated the sound of it. Still do.

Now I like people better when they're obviously a little slow compared to the same person without any developmental disabilities. The older I get, the more my own delays stack and the wider the gulf gets between me and "normal" people. And I still have that annoying sunny sped energy that is endearing to the normies in small doses, but not usually something they want long-term.

Not really afraid or distrustful of male autists, though. I just bully them if they don't act decent and that seems to work well enough in my personal life. But the male autists in my friend group are able to mask better than I am so I'm seen as a benchmark for acceptable behavior.

No. 1226585

It’s RSD. Rejection sensitive dysphoria Noni and yes I have it. Yes sometimes I take stuff to mellow.
I think you might be on to something. I was abused into melt downs and then taunted over them furthering the abuse for reacting, so I had to learn to not. Now I shut down or desperately escape the situation and melt down by myself. I’ll give this song a listen. I really like opium by Emile Simon. If I’m doing really poorly. It’s very gentle and I can almost hide in the rhythm

No. 1226588

Dumb question nonna, but does weed and getting high beforehand help your social interaction at all? I can speak verbally after weed and a lot of other people I've talked to have an easier time socializing while high.

No. 1226597

Yes. Part of our issue is too much of a specific chemical. I forget which, but weed specifically slows the production so in normies it makes them really dumb, but in small doses in autismos like us it can actually help correct the over production.

No. 1226607

Oh my goodness you beautiful nonnie you have answered something I have been wondering for years, thank you.

No. 1226636

Once in a while but I try to save it for AFTER I fuck up. It's nice that weed helps you. For socializing i use Adderall because it kinda forces the words out of my mouth. Like I have to talk. Sometimes I feel like the severe stress, anxiety, muscle tension and stuff is worse than doing a little bit of drugs or drinking a bit. We're just trying to cope and do our best.

No. 1226652

>RSD. Rejection sensitive dysphoria
Take a normie who messes up occasionally. They get embarrassed and move on, then there's a good while in between before they fuck up again. For the typical sperg it's just constant. Constant embarrassment and rejection. It's like having a wound reopened over and over and over. Are we overly sensitive for thinking it hurts? I kinda don't understand.

No. 1226666

No we hyper fixate on it, we tend to be pretty one tracked and we aren’t good at emotional regulation. There’s brain structure reasons for that. I’m not saying you’re bad or wrong for getting upset. There’s just a term for the specific intense feeling you have after because not everyone on the spectrum has it and it’s not by normies standards considering “proportional” having the ability label and separate things helps me cope since I have an easier time understanding why when I catch it.

No. 1226824

I never thought of this as stimming or self soothing behavior but you've made me think a log. I listen to the same song/set of songs for months at a time for hours at a time every day and don't change my music preferences, have no urge to listen to other things..
even the content doesn't always matter just the sounds and colors of it.

Trying to relate this to others lead to "oh yea totally" but listening to the same video game image song on repeat for hours every single day for months is not what they're talking about.

Thank you Nonna. I learned something, today.

No. 1226960

I do the same, Adderall during the day and weed at night when I have to mask. It sucks but it does help to be less inhibited and more sociable around normies. The average normies drinks constantly anyways so I don't think it's wrong to use drugs to give you an advantage socially

No. 1228022

File: 1655408450422.png (117.77 KB, 475x437, 320onl.png)

Are any of the autistic nonnies here too ashamed to express feelings, especially the positive ones? I always struggled with it, I didn't know how to do it properly, and the prospect of doing it made me cringe. I hate receiving presents because of that, because I never know how to react, even if I like something. I started dating for the first time and it's a nightmare. I told him once I missed him, it was much easier to do face-to-face. Now I'm on my holiday in my home country and we only texted once and it wasn't feelings-related, he just wanted to know if I'm ok and how I'm doing, he knows I'm an autist and texting and talking on the phone is a torture for me, so I'm grateful he doesn't force it. I miss him and for the past few days I've been trying to come up with the proper ways to express it with the right words but the mere prospect makes me cringe. I think my autism was amplified by the fact I was raised in a neglectful, sometimes abusive household where my mom never expressed her feelings properly, especially positive feelings, only negative ones, she also never hugged me or told me she loved me etc. I'm not assertive at all and often allowed people to walk all over me in the past, I didn't feel worthy of fighting for myself and I felt a lot of shame because I couldn't function like other kids, be it at school or home, I was way more dependent on my mother than I should, and after I graduated HS I was a neet in my early 20s and after my mother died I had to learn everything from the start. I think I'm far behind people my age and I will never catch up, especially in terms of social maturity and being able to handle formalities. But I know I have to keep struggling and pretending I'm not a drooling retard because otherwise my family would send me to a "special institution" for "people like me", which is very nice of them and totally doesn't make me want to cut off ties with them. They would never help me. The only person I think I can count on is the man I'm dating, he accepts and respects me, which I didn't know was possible. Girls were supposed to be emotional and caring and expressive and I've always appeared cold and distant to people but I'm not cold, I feel a lot, I feel sorry for people and animals constantly, so often it overwhelms me because I can't do much about other's pain, I'm also passionate about many things like art or music or science, I look at the sky and ants and trees and ladybugs and everything fills me with wonder but I can't really express those feelings in front of people, and I can't connect with the people themselves. I think I don't like people that much, despite feeling sorry for them. I like my boyfriend and I wish I knew how to express it, I don't want him to feel neglected

No. 1228357

I relate to you a lot Noni. I think instead of attempting to be someone else maybe find new ways to express yourself your way. I have difficulty expressing emotions physically and I can be selectively mute, but I’m very dependable. I’ll always show up when it matters for the people I care about it and they know it. I also am big on acts of service and remembering important little details. I’ll learn their favorite coffee, flower, dinner, I’ll make notes in my phone of the things they want for later holidays so the gifts are always personalized to them and what they want. Things that show I care and I’m here. I also write loose poetry and sketch portraits. My current partner jokes I’m the goblin girlfriend. Also bringing shiny trinkets and then disappearing to go do goblin things.
On the same note I always work to match their needs that are important communication wise. My current partner was in a very toxic relationship before this and he struggles to voice difficult emotions in person so for stuff like that I’m patient and we text each other the questions and answers.
Maybe that helps. You’re not broken. You’re just different and I would focus on you and your partner and less on the world.

No. 1229308

This is long, and I'm sorry. I swear you could pinpoint us in forums or anywhere else because of our multiple paragraph long posts. I've had mostly shit psych doctors. Found a licensed counselor later on that listened and wasn’t a shit that dismissed things that I brought up, but cracking open and talking about things just made me have actual anxiety attacks in her office while talking about even mundane things sometimes. My eyes would water, my throat would start to tighten up and I would struggle to breathe, and my hearing would start to crap out entirely like I was listening to muffled sounds outside with earbuds in. That was physically stressful and no thanks. I evidently don't do vulnerability to strangers that are being paid to listen to me, even if I really like them as a person. She introduced me to a female doctor that had a really chill, but would still laugh on my jokes and help make visits more lighthearted. She was great, eventually settled that I should have just been back on my ADHD meds instead of the blue billion antidepressant brands and types, and the ADHD was the root cause of the repetitive thoughts and subsequent anxiety/anxiety attacks. I was diagnosed in childhood though, with subsequent diagnoses twice more in adulthood already though. She started seeing other doctors as patients though and moved up in the company. So I ended up with a dude in her office that I was fucking terrified would just dismiss me at every appointment. He's surprisingly pretty great too, further legitimized my concerns about fillers in generics with different drug manufacturers, and treats me like an adult.
So many of these fucking doctors will be condescending and shit if you question their treatment choices and have concerns aboutthe medication side effects (much of my experience with the awful ones was pre-Obamacare when they were getting kickbacks from the pharmaceutical companies to shill their shitty drugs).

No. 1229314

It might be hard to wave away the feeling of being cringy when expressing emotions, or who knows?Maybe you'll have an easier time once you get the hang of things. Could you try writing it out on paper in a pen that you like writing with a few times to pick apart a way to verbally express it? If he's visual enough, illustrative imagery might work. Sometimes showing is easier than talking.

No. 1229795

Might be a bit longer blogpost. I'm kinda trying to find out what's wrong with me. Does this sound like some light autism?
I've been to so many psychiatrists because I had a lot of social distress and they never really could diagnose me in a fitting way. Most would think it's social anxiety or depression but that never felt like it fit. I always felt like I somehow am different, a lot of people seem like NPCs I couldn't understand while I'm a person, I never felt connected to my gender expression either (but I still do my best by researching what I should look like and do a good job). I also felt like I was missing some kind of conversation and socialisation gene, no matter how much I tried it just wouldn't work. I often looked (and even now do) at people's expressions and copy that, for example I noticed that people look at other people when they laugh at something so I started doing it even though I don't understand it and think it isn't natural. I read somewhere you're supposed to look at the person you like the most out of the group or something so I do that.
I felt so at ease with mandatory respirators because I could just look at eyes (smiling eyes would squint) and didn't have to control my expression. I have to plan eye contact, looking away and so on. I have weird obscure fixations I spend so much time on, I'm also terminally online. I have sensory issues, I can't stomach texture of any meat, gag with any smell of cold food, obsess over clean glasses/forks and could never eat at my friends house, the food would make me sick, I found not knowing the kitchens disgusting. I study medicine and always was a studious type so that would also check out. I have a very peculiar and weird sense of humor. I practice conversations and would have a checklist of things to talk about. Love when I don't have any events, staying at home with having now meet ups is so freeing but I feel guilt for not being social. I plan a lot of social things just because that's normal for adult woman. I overanalyse what people say, get fixated on people being tactful and if they break the social rules of tact I get irrationally angry and might even cut them off. I analyse social hierarchy and can read people quite well imo, but I stand outside most of the times. Can't recognise faces properly though.
I feel like I have a lot of small quirks that might be a bit autistic-adjacent but I'm not sure I'm weird 'enough'. I'm almost 30 now and I've settled into being okay with being a little bit weird. I look like a good-looking happy person from the outside now and it gets hard to honestly speak with psychiatrists because I can't drop the smiley calming way I've learn to talk in, I look pretty normal and they won't believe me.
That said I might just be not well socialised and maybe fucked up by some bullying I experienced while I was a kid because I was this wolf-obsessed weirdo ugly nerd who'd physically fight back. I always hated boys btw kek.

No. 1230454

Sounds like it to me.

No. 1231267

Anxiety attacks in the therapists office sounds very familiar. The worst part was when the therapists would then get annoyed with me for being “uncooperative”, which would just make me shut down even harder. I’m glad you’ve met a few people who treat you well and actually listen to you. Maybe it’s possible to learn how to be vulnerable with strangers with practice? It’s a miserable process, though, I wouldn’t blame you for not wanting to do that again.
I’ve only ever met one person who recognised my anxiety attacks for what they were and didn’t treat me like a time-wasting nuisance, but the subsequent autism diagnosis meant I couldn’t see her anymore because she was part of the anxiety unit and I got moved to the autism unit. Which sucked, because all the autism unit did was provide basic psychoeducation in a group setting and it was only for patients aged 21 and under because autistic adults are a lost cause I guess?

Have any other autism anons also fallen in this weird gap where you can’t get help for social anxiety because mh providers who specialise in social anxiety don’t know anything about autism (especially in women) and the ones who specialise in autism don’t really do therapy? When I seek help from the autism angle I’m told that adults shouldn’t expect anything beyond diagnosis and basic psychoeducation you can get from a book. But when I seek help for anxiety-related issues (including RSD) I always end up with people who don’t understand autism at all and inadvertently make things worse by insisting on things like exposure therapy or refusing to acknowledge the very real social rejection that underlies RSD. There are studies showing that non-autistic people often take an immediate dislike to autistic people based entirely on first impressions (or even just our faces? I’ll have to look it up), and it would be nice to have someone who could teach me how to deal with that reality instead of dismissing my experiences and telling me it’s all a figment of my imagination that I could get rid of by thinking positively or whatever.

>I swear you could pinpoint us in forums or anywhere else because of our multiple paragraph long posts.


No. 1231425

I'd like to know more about RSD and their own experiences if anyone can. I got diagnosed with it after being said I'm bipolar from a psych ward visit. Rejection sensitivity has always been a huge issue for me. I thought it was more of a sign of BPD and had no idea it was common in female ASD

No. 1232682

I was lucky to finally feel like I got somewhere, and it's disheartening as hell to see so many people struggle with the same problems finding doctors that I did.
It's really weird that RSD wouldn't be treated alongside female autism, or maybe I'm just drawing lines there that only I'm seeing. I know it's supposed to be common in girls with ADHD as well, so would there be any way to seek out a doctor that typically counsels ADHD patients with RSD? They're not the same disorder, but those counselors might have a baseline understanding of the types of struggles that an autistic woman has had because of the similarities in behavioral and social struggles. It's not a perfect solution, maybe not even ideal at all for you, but it might be a start?
I'm a terrible source for that. I'm a turd and just expect rejection anyway, so I just blurt out all of my feelings about something to save myself the trouble. Better to burn the wood before it turns into a bridge that I'll feel more hurt over I guess. The people that have stuck around after I share opinions and are patient enough to let me clarify are the ones that I'm dog loyal to.

No. 1232722

Is RSD a real diagnosis? I'm not saying that it's not what you experience, but I have AVPD and always thought it's that rather than ADHD. RSD is new to me as an entirely separate thing.

No. 1232746

I have RSD related issues as a ADHD Autist sperg. It’s not a separate diagnosis, but depending on where you live it can be part of the diagnosis criteria. Burgerland from what I know ignores it and refuses to see it which might be part of the reason female autist and such get labeled with BPD there more. Places in Europe and several mental health orgs link it closely. What do you want to know? What triggers it for me? What helps? The things I’ve been taught to cope? How it feels?

No. 1232761

DAE have the experience of being bullied by male autistic/adhd friends before diagnosis? In my former friend group I ghosted for basically ruining my self esteem, there was a guy with adhd and one with asd, and both would gang up on and attack me. It got worse over the course of a year until it became malicious sabotage involving things like gaslighting me into undermining my talents in my career and hobbies until I quit, just constantly telling me I'm shit and all my praise is undeserved and that I'll never improve so I should give up. They'd say awful things about my appearance, my voice, mental health, etc, one time I was sexually assaulted while out clubbing with this friend group and the asd guy didn't give a fuck when I told him and just started talking my ear off about wrestling and the other told me I was lying. Whenever I'd try and stick up for myself they'd shield one another touting they can't help it due to their disorder and not understanding social cues. They were both diagnosed as children but after I got my diagnosis as an adult I reconnected to rub it in their faces and tell them off because I never treated them the way they did me and a lot of the things they bullied me for were how asd/adhd presented for me so for them to attack me as "ableist" when I told them they were hurting my feelings was hypocritical.

It still really burns, like I lived with thinking I was just stupid and made wrong and that's why everything seems so much harder for me than other people, but these guys knew for their whole lives and, maybe I'm jealous, but I'm trying to fix myself now that I know what's wrong with me and all they care to do is use it as a get out of jail free card for being cunts. I'm still friends with the asd guy since I've known him for a really long time and he's tolerable to hang out with by himself. I don't have other friends I've known for as long as him and he likes the same niche music as me, and it's nice having a male friend who I know doesn't want to fuck me, even if he does reaffirm this by saying stuff like, "I tell people that when I need to lose a boner I think about you."

No. 1232792

I'm sorry but what the fuck? These guys are not real friends. The way you're wording it (i.e. describing him as "tolerable"), it sounds like you're just settling with having that one guy as your friend. Even if he's affirming his lack of attraction towards in a joking manner (which is what I'm assuming since it's the only way his degrading statement towards you feels somewhat excusable), his past history with you is pretty fucked up. He acted like a typical antisocial moid lacking empathy. Has he ever even shown remorse for his actions towards you? It sounds like you are deeply lacking self-esteem. I really hope you find better friends who actually value your personality.

In my own personal experience, autistic moids are usually completely awful and their lack of empathy and emotional intelligence makes me want to stay far away from them. They tend to be complete trash who like you said, use their diagnosis as an excuse so you shouldn't take anything they say seriously.

No. 1232858

both of these dickheads sound like my adhd-having and probably autistic ex: tons of negging, self-pity, and ignoring you when you try to bring up serious topics to go sperg about whatever they're obsessed with at the moment. like the other anon said, that dude isn't your friend. i get what you mean about having someone around who also likes the uncommon things you do, but your self-respect is worth more than that.

No. 1232874

I had a couple of male asd friends in the years before I ever suspected my own tism. Not super close friends. IME they're mostly just pornsick and lack a filter.. they crush on you and try to play games and manipulate you but they're so retaarded that you see it a mile away. Looking back now I'd never befriend another male tist. If a guy overshares sexual shit with me randomly.. I'm gone. I put up with way too much of that all because 'well I have the tism so I can't help it' Sorry but you can.

What I hate about it to this day is.. It gave me this shitty view of what autism is even at a high functioning level. It made me want to resisit my own assessment. I associated it with manbabies who treat people poorly and who throw tantrums when a woman doesn't return their feelings. It took me a while to learn to seperate male and female tism as if they're two entirely different things.

No. 1232911

I don't know if I would say friends, but I had some pretty volatile interactions with an ADHD male in the past

No. 1233216

Yes. Autistic female. Got absolutely shit on by autistic males and I hate them now. They’re a walking red flag. Love my fellow lady spergs though.

No. 1233454

Is it wrong to not really want to make friends with people? Most of my close friends either moved away or stopped talking to me, and I don't really feel any different. I can talk to people and socialize just fine in small bursts, but I don't have a great desire to keep in contact with someone if I don't see them regularly and end up pushing them away if they bother me too much. All my free-time activities are solitary, and my bf is similar so we can happily coexist without saying much for hours. Plus, I see my family fairly regularly, so it feels like I'm set on social interaction and I don't really have room for more.
>inb4 schizoid-chan
Nope, just garden-variety sperg.

No. 1233509

Do any nonnies know of any over-the-counter or at home remedies that can help with the inattentive aspect of ADD? Before anyone asks I can't take ADD medications due to health issues (and my state is strict about them anyway) but this aspect of the disorder is the hardest to deal with. I do have a planner that helps me keep my tasks on track but I still space out and get distracted, unable to focus, schoolwork was always a hassle and it takes months to just write a chapter of a story. I hate this.

No. 1233535

There's lemon balm. L-theanine is supposed to help with calm focus as well and comes in matcha. Make sure you source them both from reputable places though.

No. 1233661

“Male friends” is the root cause of all problems tbh. The only male friends I still talk to are either gay or are husbands of my female friends so I kinda have to keep in touch with them. Even those get triggered or go silent when I dare suggest a woman should make her own money, make her own financial decisions and have saving and have a goal in life. I’ll get the “oh but I’ll buy her whatever she needs!” reply occasionally. It should give you an idea about males.

No. 1233665

>Is it wrong to not really want to make friends with people?
Not at all. I used to feel like it was, but trying to make friends when you really prefer to be alone is a lot of stress for you and eventually the people you are attempting to make friends with. It's much easier to let friendships develop naturally if they do and not sweat it if they don't. You aren't wrong or necessarily even missing out on anything by liking alone time or not making new friends, it's just how some of us are.

No. 1233694

I am exactly the same way. I have no desire to make friends and am happy with just my boyfriend and my family. The only problem is that my extreme introversion gets in the way of things like forming professional connections.

No. 1233698

I use an ambient noise app with a combo of brown noise and a looping bass melody. Headphones and a timer if you get that "oh no I'm stuck here forever" dread feeling, just put a timer for 20 minutes and say you're allowed to stop trying after that.

I know it's cheesy advice but putting your phone in another room on silent really does help a lot as well.

For studying I also read out loud and talk to myself as if I'm explaining the ideas to someone else. It engages more of your senses so you don't drift off.

Some say caffeine helps focus but personally it just makes me more anxious and scattered.

As for supplements, my friend says high dose of Omega 3 makes him feel the same as ritalin but those pills are expensive, not fish oil but pure Omega 3 800mg cost more than Concerta here, and it didn't work as well for me. But it's worth a try if you can find it affordable.

I'm so tired of being tied to doctors and having to jump through hoops to get meds. If I could find a natural supplement I'd switch in a heartbeat.

No. 1233743

Seconding the other anons who replied, and here's a few more:
>exercise, especially aerobic, of a moderate to high intensity several times a week
>getting enough sleep
>eating a diet high in protein
>if you're really stuck sitting down for hours at a time, sipping on something that contains a mild amount of sugar like a Gatorade or a lemonade that's not terribly sweet
>setting timers for work/breaks and taking frequent, scheduled breaks

Most of these are recommendations from Russel Barkley, a reputable ADHD expert, for kids with ADHD, but I shamelessly use them in my grown-ass adult life and they still work.

No. 1233772

Ungodly levels of caffeine

No. 1233822

I don't take medication either. I find that having a cup of matcha (one teaspoon or less) in the morning helps me wake up. If I have more or other caffeinated drinks or have it later I can't sleep and feel jittery but one morning cup is fine.

I also find getting enough sleep helps. The app Sleep Cycle wakes you up very gently at the right time and helps track how much sleep you are getting.

Lowering background stress helps too (gives you more "spoons"). Minimalism and simplifying as much of your life is good for this.

No. 1233830

File: 1655824413008.jpg (51.58 KB, 750x421, tumblr_o9ywxfXcNd1vyx4b7o1_128…)

I'm exactly the same, except I'm NC with my family too. I used to feel a lot of societal pressure to have lots of friends but being a sperg, it would never work out and I came across as weird/desperate. Being constantly rejected also gave me low self worth.

Now I see interactions like pic related. I can chat to people when I feel like it but unless they make a move to stay in contact (and I feel the same), I don't expect to see them again. It has made me value my time more and feel more "exclusive", leading to higher self worth. I no longer need other people to feel complete and I don't care if someone doesn't like me.

I don't keep in contact with people either if I'm not going to see them regularly. When I used to try catching up with people from my past, there was always a bit of reminiscing but then the conversation would fizzle out. As I have ADHD too, my interests and priorities are constantly shifting so there's seldom even common interests anymore. They're basically just strangers again. I don't like being reminded of my past "selves" either.

I feel like I can never completely relax around other people, apart from my bf as he is fine with all my spergy ways. With other people it's like I'm constantly on my tiptoes trying to act the right way and not accidentally sperg about something. Plus most conversation bores me to tears anyway.

No. 1233832

I'm exactly like this. I'm envious of you though because my gf is really clingy and needs to know what I'm doing at all times. She's an ADHDer too, we're just different types of people.

I love solitude and I hate speaking so I totally get you.

The only people I've remained in contact with for years are the types who can send a few long emails every 6 months and not hear back for a while. We pick up like nothing happened and it works.

Otherwise I just can't do it.

No. 1233838

not saying you specifically need to worry about this, but for anyone else reading, matcha on an empty stomach causes vomiting in some people.

No. 1233843

I have had this happen actually when I put way too much in a smoothie but with oatmilk and sugarfree vanilla syrup and one teaspoon only, I've never had it happen. I recommend the anon start with half a teaspoon if they think they might have issues.

No. 1233870

How did you get your gf? You remind me of a person I have a crush on, so I'm extra curious

No. 1233890

Flattering, nona <3

We met online in the late 2000s sharing art. Friends first, online dating gradually. Moved in together after that. We've been going about 15 years.

I'm not interested in anyone, ever, so all my relationships (3 including this one) have been gradual tumbles from friendship. If not for my gf, I'd be single and living alone (and fine with that) though I'm satisfied with the way things are sans wanting a bit more time to myself.

No. 1233942

Kek I have an online crush too, keep your fingers crossed for me!
Who first started flirting?
You really sound a lot like the person I'm crushing on, so it's kinda nice to hear about a relationship that ended up being succesful. 15 years, that's amazing!

No. 1233949


Fingers crossed– you can do it. Best of luck.

Hm.. that's a hard one. She was going through a lot and I became her support system. We got close that way. I think we just realized gradually that we had feelings for each other. I'm not flirtatious but I can be a bit unintentionally aloof and that seems to be appealing for some (lol) but I was very warm with her.

We shared a lot and eventually I left home to move. It's been a bumpy road but things have settled considerably and we've both grown as people.

Thank you! I'm surprised myself, because I never imagined this outcome, but here we are. Anniversary is coming up in October.

No. 1233953

take it to discord

No. 1233956

Why in the fuck would anyone join the discord on anon board you dumbass? Leave them alone. They’re in the right thread.

No. 1233969

it's not a chat thread to talk about your gf uwu. it's for talking about being on the spectrum

wtf does this have to do with autism

or this

or this

or this

stop shitting up the thread. no1curr

No. 1233975

You good? Theres a vent thread if you need it.

No. 1233978

at least sage if you're going to shit up the thread

No. 1233979

Two women with ADHD discussing social and flirting dynamics and giving advice? What could that ever have to do with something that causes social impairment?
Take your meds anon.

No. 1233985

they weren't talking about that though, they were discussing the anon's gf

now you're shitting up the thread arguing. just fucking stop

No. 1233989

Don't gatekeep autism you autist.

No. 1234004

Fuck off, i was gonna drop the topic when you've barged in. I'm an ADHD retard crushing on another one. So I didn't state it clearly… Who the fuck cares, this is /ot/ and we have saged. Your retarded minimodding has brought in more shit than our harmless post exchange.

No. 1234010

stop shitting up the thread

No. 1234044

Ignore the foaming at the mouth retard Noni. I’m a fellow sperg and adhd and thought it was cute and reflected on my own relationship.

No. 1234048

Does anyone have any experience with psilocybin and autism? I used to unselfconsciously exhibit very autistic behaviors until I was 21 and started experimenting with shrooms. I feel like in some way gave me a sense of self-awareness or perhaps broke down an enormous wall between myself and the world around me in a way that I never thought possible.

For example, I used to hold myself and rock all the time. Breaking that habit was nigh impossible. It embarrassed my parents and they were always trying desperately to get me to stop (they were the type of parents who dOn'T bElIeVe In MeNtAl IlLnEsS so I never got any treatment, just confusion and yelling at me to act normal). I always did well in school and made a few friends (usually fellow autists) so life wasn't terrible. But I couldn't make eye contact and I used to be repulsed and sickened by certain foods and human touch.

In college I wanted to be cool so I ended up dabbling in drugs. I hated most of them but shrooms I researched. I created the proper scenario and dosage in order to have "spiritual" experiences because when I get interested in something, no matter how weird, I tend to get very curious and go all the way. What happened was not necessarily "spiritual." I tripped out a lot by myself and when I came out of that summer I could make eye contact and had stopped stimming by pinching myself and rocking. I just stopped. Also, as I said before, I felt like I had been living behind a thick wall that cut me off from what people were thinking and feeling, and that wall nearly dissolved. It was also comparable to having a ringing in my ears that I didn't realize was there that had also stopped after that summer.

I still have the 'tism but I am able to mask in ways that are (generally) not exhausting and I very rarely struggle with social cues. No more stimming except sometimes I twirl my hair when I feel awkward. I still get into a "zone" when I'm stressed out at work where I become extremely hyperfocused and untouchable. It makes people uncomfortable because I can react badly if anything or anyone distracts me from my tasks. But, I used to be that way ALL the time, not just at work.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble, I am very curious if anyone here has any related experiences to share! I apologize if I sound crazy.

No. 1234093

ADHD meds don't work on me. I've tried ALL of them. Vyvanse, Concerta, Ritalin, Wellbutrin XL…. Maybe I don't actually have ADHD kek???? What do I do?

No. 1234146

Does anyone know what works best if you have adhd and also severe ocd? My doctor said it's highly possible I do have adhd and I might try going on meds for it, but I also heard they can make ocd worse. Is there a combination that has worked for anyone or things that you do everyday that genuinely help? I feel trapped and stuck with knowing I have to do things but I will put it off until the very last minute each time because I get distracted and fall behind having to do stupid rituals that take up too much time and energy. I will spend so much time doing basic hygiene like washing hands and using deodorant and shaving that it makes doing it a nightmare. Obviously I force myself to do it but I wish there was a way to make it not so stressful and I had the energy to do things I really want and need to do. Maybe it's from adhd and it's making it worse. This has been a problem for years and only now has a doctor taken the time to say that it's a possibility. Just wondering if there's a way to fix it so I can stop mentally suffering just by doing basic tasks

No. 1234152

That sounds amazing. I definitely believe psilocybin can rewire your brain, give you new discoveries-if used correctly. Do you feel you understand others a lot more now?

No. 1234638

Yes! In a way that's difficult to put into words but I'll try. It's like people were once made of these badly rendered geometry blocks like in the dawn of 3D animation when it was still shitty. People were more like concepts than people, and I had a hard time grasping personal development or other "out-of-character" things that people in my life would do. Now I feel like I can see others how a "normal" person might. The resolution has improved greatly. People are complex and flowy, and often unpredictable, and I understand that's literally what being a human is. Put in a less weird way, I feel like I can just "see" people better. Like – you're no longer this one particular rigid entity that has 3 qualities I know how to interact with. You're just … whatever you are, in that moment, and that's not scary or confusing anymore. Fun question to answer, thanks for asking.

No. 1234843

Why are all neurotypicals psycopaths?

No. 1234850

This question reeks of victim mentality

No. 1234860

Most of them naturally experience emotional empathy and never felt it necessary to develop cognitive empathy making them very limited to only their world view?

No. 1234862

File: 1655896778205.png (989 KB, 609x889, 10E1DB0C-CAB9-494A-A1F7-6B19FE…)

Stop trying to infight

No. 1234941

Ffs, can we stop with the automatic defending of NTs and demonizing of autists already? This is one of the few places on the internet where autists can gather and vent, especially for female autists.

Some NTs ARE psychopaths or act that way towards autists. Being a repeat victim of bullying is a near universal experience for autists. They even ask about it in assessments.

Stating that you’ve had bad experiences with NTs or prefer the autist mindset and way of doing things is fine. People are allowed different opinions. You are allowed to keep sucking off NTs if that’s what you prefer but take it elsewhere.

No. 1234946

There’s a difference between what you said and “all NTs are psychopaths.” The irony of that statement as a simplified, black-and-white worldview is not lost on me either.

No. 1234950

It’s a place to vent. I really doubt they meant every single NT in existence but interesting you seem to be reading it that way.

No. 1235012

File: 1655912156084.png (62.81 KB, 678x786, NTs are unethical.PNG)

If you aren't a triggered NT, you sure play the part well. They don't need defending here.

There's studies that show that autists will maintain the same ethical decision whether alone or observed by others, even when making a less ethical choice would benefit us: https://www.jneurosci.org/content/41/8/1699 This study portrays our "moral inflexibility" and cost consideration as a negative trait, but that's because autists are a minority. If we were the majority, the nonautistic trait of "moral flexibility" would definitely be seen as psychopathic, or at least a character flaw. I think the reason it's not seen as the negative trait it is is because most non-autists lack the self awareness to even know they're making unethical choices, and those that get close will rationalize their choices via self-serving feelings.

No. 1235056

You have to wonder what the world would be like if there were more NDs than NTs. I think in many ways it would be better and probably worse in others (more meltdowns for sure).

I wish there was more conversations about the ways in which being (aspergers type) ND can be superior. Being more honest, often higher IQ, quiet workers, etc. It feels like most conversations focus on the negatives or people who have low iq, which is weird when you consider that a lot of people that NTs look up to (e.g. Einstein) were probably on the spectrum. NDs obviously aren’t superior in every single way but they aren’t inferior in every way either.

No. 1235080

I don't have concrete studies for this, but there are theories in some anthropology circles that early human inventions were attributed to ND people. It takes both an asocial personality and an ability for deep focus in order to, for example, ignore the group fire activity and strike two stones against each other until one shapes into a usable tool. This might be a little tinfoily, but I've always believed ND people are supposed to exist in human groups to provide skills that the majority does not usually possess.

No. 1235106


AYRT, the funny part is I've gotten healthier than I have been but my attention span has actually gotten worse. I rarely use my phone (I go on websites on my home computer) except to make phone calls or as an alarm for work and I go to the gym several times a week, but my attention span is so bad that I just can't watch shows or write stories anymore. Maybe this is just growing up or something but I wish I could at least try a medication since I'm at a good point where it's not likely I'll get hardcore addicted. I have friends in more liberal states who say that Concerta or Ritalin helped them write whole novels and it makes me so jealous.

No. 1235126


If everyone had autism, the world would be a better place because:
>We are often highly intelligent and have unique perspectives that can contribute to making the world a better place
>We are often very honest and direct, which can lead to more effective communication and less misunderstandings
>We are often very loyal and supportive friends, which can lead to stronger relationships and a more supportive world
>We often have a great appreciation for nature and the world around them, which can lead to a greater respect for the environment
>We often have a strong sense of justice, which can lead to a more fair and just world

No. 1235138

You forget that autistic men exist and they're usually way worse than non autistic men somehow. All of the testosterone and tard rage, more ways to justify his shitty behaviors, and more ways for him to discover how to be a degenerate coomer.

No. 1235151

You know we can have conversations without men being a focus. Can we in a female only community talk about females without having to consider the men or are you that obsessed with dick?

No. 1235161

I might just be lucky to know older autists who grew up before ND men were coddled, but male autists are usually fine when they're held to higher than average standards like autistic women are. When they're taught to be ashamed for their outbursts and expected to socialize better than their nonautistic peers, they can make halfway decent humans. The autistic integrity is there, just muddied by maleness.

No. 1235165

Went into our college's office today because I had some questions related to paperwork. The woman I was assigned to had her door open, I knocked lightly and said "Excuse me, she said "I'll be with you in a second, just finishing up this document", so I greeted her and sat down. Then she spent another 5 minutes trying to attach some file to some e-mail and then turned to me and I could feel some animosity on her part. Then I realized she probably expected me to wait outside the door, not take a seat on the other side of the table immediately. And this was me on a good day, I'm so blind to norms like these.

No. 1235195

They make up half of the population. OP said we'd be better off if the whole population was autistic, but we wouldn't be because half of the population has that Y chromosome that makes them monsters.

No. 1235197

Well in today's society they're coddled, so I guess you are lucky. A lot of these trannies we make fun of are likely autists who have been led astray and now they're violent women haters who wear dresses.

No. 1235226

Regardless of whether they’re autistic or not moids are a problem. So what was the point of your statement? The world would probably still be better. You just wanted to remind us moids exist and most of them are rape apes?

No. 1235228

The world would be better if all women were autistic then

No. 1235234

Seriously, autistic women are so much better than NT that it's not even funny. So many NT women I know are psychopaths

No. 1235236

A lot of them are. This isn't a defense for male autists, but a lot of the problems we see with autistic people (violent scrote males who can't control themselves and hiki/NEET women who lack opportunity) are due to a lack of social support and purpose. Autistic women aren't given any real support to flourish due to misogyny and autistic men don't have purpose in their special interests anymore. Instead of cataloguing every type of lizard found in their town and sharing that information with others (a contribution to society), we have male autists who gatekeep comic stores and think hentai is real and troon out (obviously not a contribution to anything.)

No. 1235252

Piggybacking off of this:
>We have strong pattern recognition and stable morals, which makes us great advisors
>We often excel at outside-the-box thinking, and can provide unique ideas to many situations
>We have diverse sensory integration, which allows us to excel at tasks that are difficult for others
>We have deep reserves of compassion and excel at nonstandard communication, this makes many of us better suited to work with animals

No. 1235271

good god why do autists always do this overcompensation kek the sheer narcissism is astounding kek

No. 1235274

You sound like a butthurt NT. Fuck off

No. 1235275

Wow such empathy. Such great cognitive skill. Hope you never need help since you’re attitude is why you have no one to call the end of the day. NT not become friendless social retards by 30 challenge. Oops already failed?

No. 1235280

most of mine were about ways we can help the rest of you because human society takes many types of people to function and i want other people to be happy and live in a good environment, but go off i guess.

No. 1235281

Yeah Neurotypicals are absolute psycopaths. They're jealous because they recognize we're superior and conspire to keep us down

No. 1235282

File: 1655923827376.jpg (74.21 KB, 564x773, ratboy online.jpg)

>get in a situation where I'm talking to some new people
>talk to this one girl
>she admits that she's high-functioning autistic and was diagnosed at 17
>tell her that I'm autistic and how it's nice to see another autistic woman
>says that she recognised that I was autistic, but most normies won't be able to recognise it
>we talk a bit and it's nice
>she suggests that she might get into drug dealing
>I think that's weird but whatevs
>she talks about how she loves formula 1 racing
>she admits she watches 'bestgore' and 'r/morbid curiosity'
>says her autism sometimes is channelled into war as a topic
>she watches wendigoon, and so do I, so we bond over that a little
>tell her how 'I got to this site that's comfy but overtly misandrist and transphobic and gets spammed with gore by incels sometimes'
>idk why I mentioned lolcow. I didn't say 'lolcow' or anything so she still doesn't know about this site
>idgaf about 'transphobia', but I phrase it that way to seem more normie
>says that transphobia goes against her and her sister's values
>she doesn't seem to care that I visit a 'transphobic' site since she visits sites that 'sound sus' as well
>say that they sometimes stream movies on cytube
>the conversation shifts to weird stuff that happened when we were kids, how bad the local area is etc
>the conversation naturally shifts to her talking about how taking a psychology class made her realise that she experienced abuse when she was younger
>admit that I've never faced trauma like that
>says that I give off innocent vibes
>we exchange numbers
she's a bit of rough around the edges but she seems nice. I know the way I talked about her might've portrayed her in a negative light, but she does seem generally quite nice. We've hit it off quite nicely and It'd be nice to be friends with another autistic woman

No. 1235283

I'm in a field with a pretty even mix of NT and ND women. I wouldn't say we excel at compassion or even communication between ND people, most people that showed me compassion and had the flexibility and were considerate to my needs are NTs.

No. 1235286

omg nonna she sounds fun and kinda sus, good for you and i hope you keep hitting it off

No. 1235292

I don't know about that. Sounds extreme and too coordinated. I think most NTs just aren't used to the idea that their default mode shouldn't be the only way of existing and get a bit testy at ND people doing some things better than they can.

No. 1235293

nonnie, there is litteraly an anon who talks about f1 on lc sometimes, maybe it's her or just a funny coincidence kek

No. 1235295

>Wow such empathy
if you're really trying to say that autists have higher empathy than the non-autists, boy do i have news to tell you kek
>Such great cognitive skill
kekekekek same as above kekk
>Hope you never need help since you’re attitude is why you have no one to call the end of the day
I love how you autists think that you're the only people in the world who have knowledge and interests in important shit - funny shit
>NT not become friendless social retards by 30 challenge. Oops already failed?
tears are streaming down my face as i type, what is this projection??

No. 1235296

NT people have no individuality. They are like a hivemind

No. 1235300

not an autist saying this kek

No. 1235302

I think you're a shit-stirring NT trying to justify a victim complex. Kindly go back.

No. 1235304

Oh wow you don’t even know the difference between emotional empathy and cognitive? How low is your iq?

No. 1235307

I know this is a literal autism thread but could you guys please be a little less autistic

No. 1235310

File: 1655924870365.jpeg (110.17 KB, 750x985, 63E2E486-E103-4DFB-A080-DD4B35…)

The late diagnosed ADHD to substance abuse pipeline is real and I’m suffering and just want it to end

No. 1235311

>let me barge into this thread where I'm not wanted and post dumb comments to show my superior empathy and cognitive skills

No. 1235317

the 'tist rage is funny tho

No. 1235321

says someone who doesn't know the difference between your and you're kek

No. 1235324

ok, whoever this is just lost the argument because they had to resort to being a grammar nazi

let's stop shitting up the thread now and get back on topic

No. 1235335

spelling things correctly and knowing what and when words are used properly are parts of iq tests

No. 1235337

this isn't a spelling or iq test. no1curr

No. 1235347

Any other nonnas getting sucked into hyperfocus a little too hard? I got back into my project and once I start I don't stop until it's time to sleep. Do you go with the focus flow or try to fight it? And if you do mediate it, how do you do it?

No. 1235357

I hate interrupting my focus. If it’s important. I’ll set alarm breaks for things like food and water. More than anything I can play the chunks of time around stuff I know I’ll hyper focus so I’m already fed and whatever beforehand to help.

No. 1235358

nonis shouldn't claim intelligence be using iq standards then

No. 1235359


No. 1235365

i am sticking my tongue out at you noni

No. 1235369

This person doesn’t seem to realize that watching someone cry and getting sad is emotional empathy something spergs struggle with because the social part of our brains is wired differently so we develop improved cognitive empathy over time the ability to think and consider other peoples perspectives and experiences to relate to them. Something most NT lazily never work on because they’re so used to their
> muh emotional empathy superpower
But overactive emotional empathy and self focus is just a personality disorder so the freak above is legit just proving the original anons point of NT being awful and entitled.
Lack of cognitive and overactive emotional is legit a huge part of personality disorders. We as spergs also can’t have Antisocial.
It’s also like being dyslexic is associated with being a sperg and can lead to spelling mistakes and them continuing is just proving they have narc tendencies. Interesting.

No. 1235383

if, as a result of female autism being better known these days, society starts coddling autistic girls like they do boys, will autistic women start getting worse?

No. 1235384

if you spergs have such high cognitive abilities, than you wouldn't constantly be narc raging on those with personality disorders/mental illness that can only develop due to continuous childhood abuse ie bpd, certain types of bipolar, etc. Y'know, cuz you'd be able to put yourselves in their shoes

No. 1235386

>bpd, certain types of bipolar
ctrl+f = no one has mentioned them in a derogatory way in this thread

No. 1235392

I think both “types” have their strengths and weaknesses and I wish there was more emphasis on embracing and appreciating our strengths instead of only correcting our weaknesses, as long as those weaknesses don’t negatively affect people around us.

My old workplace would have run 10x better if it employed a majority of (competent) autistic people. The work required us to be very focused, meticulous, detail-oriented and willing to repeat certain tasks ad nauseam. Turbonerds, essentially. Instead the boss kept hiring party frat boys who half-assed everything and left early to get beers several times a week. All of them were technically qualified and I’m sure they were fun at parties but they were objectively bad at their jobs and I was constantly having to pick up their slack. The worst part is that they didn’t even seem to realise this, like they seemed to think work just got done magically over the weekend after they all left, and would bully anyone who didn’t fit in with them until the person quit.
I went into STEM believing that traits like mine would be valued but instead I find myself being taken for granted while charismatic nt people take advantage and walk away with all the credit. It really sucks.

This is my experience too. It’s like they can only see the parts we’re “missing”, not the things we excel at. Or they downplay the importance of the things we’re good at. Those coworkers I mentioned would act like they were being held to impossible standards whenever anyone asked them to do things that were literally in the job description. Instead of considering that maybe they’d be a better fit at a different job if they couldn’t fulfil the requirements of this one, they decided that the expectations were unreasonable and “nobody” could reach those standards so we might as well throw them out and go get a beer. Meanwhile most high functioning autistic people I know would have no problem whatsoever reaching those standards, but they’re no fun at parties so they don’t count.

I’m exhausted so I’m rambling, I’m sorry. I hope this made sense to someone.

No. 1235394

no, because autist boys being like That, while majorly is due to society's overall worship of the male being, is also due to them going through male puberty thus having bigger muscles, thicker bones etc. So, while autist girls could potentially be more like the male autists in potential annoyances, they could never be as much of a physical threat

No. 1235406

This is proof that women with high functioning autism are superior

No. 1235409

Why do you say that everyone with "high-functioning" autism have a great work ethic? I think there are plenty of people with high functioning autism who struggle with executive dysfunction or aren't even proficient in science to begin with. It sucks you aren't given the credit that you deserve but it sounds like you should just find another job.

No. 1235411

you guys sure spammed about the bpds in the last one, also in the vent thread(s)
What I am trying to say is that a person's cognitive empathy is not particularly high if they cannot put themselves in the shoes of others who're not similar to themselves, autistic or NT

No. 1235414

Where did I shit on Bipolar people? Bipolar isn’t a PD and is a mood disorder that can be exasperated or worsened by outside stimuli but ultimately is genetic. If anything you putting bipolar and PwBPD in the same cup is a harmful generalization for both groups? Seems like you’re projecting and I hit the nail on the head. Why don’t you go check your own shit and out of check emotions anon?
I empathize a and relate a lot to your struggles nonnie. It’s hard for them to see us.

No. 1235417

I wish someone would make an ND oriented university focused on ND learning styles, similar to Gallaudet (deaf university). I worked as a language teacher briefly and I always had issues because I would go through the work too quickly for the students, but from my perceptive, it wasn't quick enough (I've studied a few languages myself).

Imagine if instead of lectures (complete waste of time writing things down as printers exist these days), the course was focused on self learning (with limits and guidance) and doing deep dives on course topics, which you can then discuss in detail with the professor.

Deadlines would be much more flexible and presentations would only be judged on the content, not whether you look happy and wave your arms around enough.

Everyone would get a single room to live in.

There would be no minimum number of members for societies, allowing many autists to connect over niche interests.

The lighting would be dimmer, the cafeteria food ND friendly, no loud noisy events.

No. 1235419

A lot of autistic women are diagnosed as BPD instead by dumb therapists.

No. 1235421

That sounds incredible, but I think we would have NT screeching about it not being fair. They can’t imagine someone getting extra help or different help most of the time since equity is a difficult concept. Hopefully if it happened it would inspire them to help more of their own too.

No. 1235424

I feel like I have some autistic traits like being rude and obsessed with video games. However, I just don't really relate to a lot of traits associated with autism. Personally I love being in groups and socializing. I also don't relate to having many sensory issues other than getting annoyed at loud noises. Is it bad if I'm not interested in getting a diagnosis? Or does it sound like I'm in denial?

No. 1235426

You have to have a job and be able to take care of yourself to be a high functioning autist. Being self reliant is part of the moniker noni

No. 1235427

NDs having one uni while NTs having thousands would be unfair. Of course they don't see it that way.

Gallaudet does allow hearing people I think but i wouldn't want NTs at an ND uni.

No. 1235432

Not everyone has all the traits and some can be beaten out of you by overbearing parents. If you don't have a reason to use a diagnosis then there is no reason to get one, though it can be handy to have in case of workplace bullying etc

No. 1235433

If you love socializing and don’t have sensory issues. You aren’t a sperg.
Being rude and liking things doesn’t make you autistic. Sounds like you have no idea what it is.

No. 1235434

Why? I'm not NT but I would never go there. If it's an American university it would be private and very expensive. I doubt it would also have a very big alumni base or a large endowment. It would probably be like one of those random LAC in the middle of nowhere. It's not like hearing people are clambering to get into Galludet, which really isn't that prestigious.

I went to a fairly prestigious university in an urban setting that's supposed to have a good social life so no thanks.

No. 1235437

I never said that everyone with high functioning autism has great work ethic. I’m saying that this job required people with a set of traits that are typical of (a subset of) people with high functioning autism, but the boss would rather ignore people like that in favour of unsuitable stereotypically nt bros because nt bros are what he considered normal.

lol no there are many things I suck at. However there are some niches where I ought to fit in really well and it’s frustrating to have people take that away from me. Round pegs, being the majority, hammering every hole into a round one until us square pegs have nowhere to go.
I’m going to sleep.

No. 1235438

not everyone has to pay for uni in their country

No. 1235439

have you considered that you're just a rude gamer and not neurodivergent

No. 1235441

Some autists are social and prefer high sensory loads though. Lots of autists love to go on about how everyone with autism is different. I also score pretty high on autism diagnosis tests for a woman and was evaluated for ASD when I was younger so it's not like I'm bringing this up out of nowhere
My mom is overbearing about some shit but she actually never told me to make more eye contact. So maybe it's just a good sign I'm not a sperg. idk

No. 1235444

idk the language over ASD is all over the place, so I'm struggling to figure out what's legit or not. Like apparently liking philosophy as a woman and having a "sense of justice" are autism traits too, and I have them.

No. 1235448

Sure I'm just speaking as my perspective as an American. Also the other anon bought up Galludet University and that's a private American school too

No. 1235450

I work in STEM too. I’m sorry anon. It’s rough and they laugh like fat cats about their lack of work and education it’s honestly shameful. I don’t know how they can do it. I can’t put out bad work and when they eventually get found out for doing nothing they want sympathy as they lose their job. I have none. I did both of ours and you got the raise.
I just focus on my work and education and am focused on being as high paid and specialized as I can to get away from them.

No. 1235452

Do you want the physical reasons and symptoms for Autism? Not the bullshit uwu socially media garbage? How it affects the brain structurally?

No. 1235454

No, not really. Isn't there something simpler like a list of traits? I just don't see how something so technical would be helpful.

No. 1235461

begone troll

No. 1235465

I'm not a troll. This is actually a question that has been bothering me for a while. idk, what do you think is a good list of symptoms/traits?

No. 1235468

I don’t know what you’re looking for then? The sensory issues is a part of the autism because that part of our brain is wired more tightly for example? It kind of sounds like you were just looking for an excuse to keep being rude.

No. 1235471

nta but you're coming off as really hostile. also i don't know how many of us want all of our symptoms, unless you meant have and I'm misunderstanding?
Please ignore them. Backreading the threads and seeing whether you relate to another anons experiences might be helpful. It's hard to just conjure up a list of autistic traits because much of the time autism affects most of our experiences? So it's hard to list everything at once, but listening to other autistic women and relating to our experiences is a good first step to figuring yourself out. If it sounds like stuff you've experienced your whole life, you might be autistic, if very little of it does, you might not be.

No. 1235489

I'm just looking for more clarification. Even if you told me about the brain stuff, how am I supposed to interpret that when I don't have any background in it?

Maybe it would help if I listed my traits. Here's some things I identify with

>Being different/quirky

>Not being socially successful
>Having a hard time picking up on jokes/sarcasm sometimes
>Bad on picking up romantic cues
>Having hyperfixations
>Speaking out of turn
>Needing a blanket to fall asleep at night
>Enjoying sniffing things
>Having a rigid moral code

Mind you I have ADHD so idk if some of those traits could be explained

And here's the stuff I don't relate to:

>Having meltdowns

>Having sensory issues (besides loud noises when I'm trying to concentrate)
>Not enjoying being social
>Hating fluorescent lights
>Hating parties
>Having a great work ethic
>Being shy

No. 1235491

Does anyone have an autistic diagnosis but their childhood wasn't really a stereotypically autistic? Often sources and analysis seems to take childhood behaviour into account, but for me, I seemed like a very normal child. Didn't have any developmental delays, I was very social and talkative, had no problems making friends and was often even the "leader" of social groups. Then after starting puberty, I've developed a lot of autistic traits which made my teenage years a nightmare, and they persist into adulthood (even though I got a lot better at handling my outbursts and preventing meltdowns), where my profile seems to be incredibly similiar to other autistic women.
I'm just not sure if that's possible after being a child with zero suspicion of being on the spectrum.

No. 1235505

Not sure why you’ve grouped me in with someone else. All I did was ask if they wanted a list of symptoms grouped by which parts of the brain are affected to show the difference between those behaviors on a developmental level. Autism isn’t just symptoms Noni. The symptoms exist for a reason. The above anon just listed video games and rude. If anything that was rude and an offensive stereotype to come ask for help with

No. 1235506

A lot of those are related to ADHD Noni.

No. 1235511

People looking for "typical traits" need to remember this all skews male, women with autism are often vastly superior in terms of navigating communication and social situations. A man can be obtuse and rude without question, so they can have more obvious traits which an autistic woman can mask.
ADHD and autism also have a lot in common so for nonas who already are sure to have adhd, I'm not sure how useful cross-examining that with autism really is.

No. 1235516

there are 5 forms of bipolar and all can develop from environmental factors i.e. childhood trauma - celebrity example, azealia banks has diagnosed bipolar as a result of her mother's repeated mental and physical abuse - calling her ugly, worthless,beating her,etc - followed by a coddling period where her mother would give her whatever she physically wanted and then would repeat the physical and mental abuse once again, repeating the cycle until azealia permanently left home to live with one of her sisters in middle school i.e she developed bipolar disorder from parental abuse
yeah bpd is misdiagnosed/overdiagnosed a majority of the time. The fact that therapists/psychologists/etc misdiagnose bpd and adhd/autism for each other a lot should say something tho

No. 1235518

There’s female specialists who focus on females. There’s entire guides for us now with similar traits just for women with autism. Not trying to take away from you, but the field is changing.

No. 1235519

Well idk how good I am at navigating social situations compared to other women. I feel like I'm way worse than most women.

No. 1235524

I think anon meant it compared to men. Often people just shrug when male autists can't behave in social situations, the same luxury (if you can call it that) isn't given to female 'tists.

No. 1235542

I wanna know if there's some sort of database out there for people by state or country that help with female, particularly adult, autism. Just a big list of safe doctors. It's been so hard to find anyone, especially with my shit insurance. All autism websites and organizations so far I've gone on just acknowledge that adult diagnosis is hard and then provide no help for it.

No. 1235593

File: 1655934659055.jpg (15.51 KB, 434x434, d35499bd8c20adde9830ee7d27169b…)

Any nona here was diagnosed with social anxiety? It's been half a year since I'm going to see a psychiatrist and I've been told yesterday I have social anxiety, however the psychiatrist also brought up the possibility of female Asperger's. He's still not sure if it's one or the other, so I'm still being evaluated. Whats the difference? (I ask here because google seems to show very outdated info about the differences)
The symptoms of social anxiety matchs up with what I feel, however i also show traits of Asperger's such as sensibility to textures, sounds (I go out with ear plugs, or else I get disoriented with all the noises around me) I tend to not look at people in the eyes, just to name a few.
Anybody else is or was in the same situation as me?

No. 1235645

this is exactly why autism in women isnt taken seriously, most women who have high functioning autism are forced to mask behavior and mimic all of their life which is very hard and stressful by the way, because if they dont mask then they wll face bullying, ridicule and even physical assault in some cases.

this ''autist women are perfect and are just like neurotypicals'' are exactly why actual autistic women never go to get diagnosed and instead its the attention seeking, tiktok girls who have no identity who go and try to get (false) diagnoses.

No. 1235648

Hey anons as someone who had actual social anxiety im going to give you some actual advice.
Social anxiety is never just social anxiety, many times it is caused by something to trigger it, and the only way to to lessen the social anxiety is to find out the underlying cause. The underlying causes could be alot, it could be health related, hormones, mental illness, autism, trauma, negative self perception ,paranoia, upbringing etc etc etc.

Take my advice the only way for you to get rid of it is to find out the underlying cause because all doctors will do is is give you meds or therapy that wont work.

No. 1235713

DA but I agree. I honestly wish I did CBT or something (I know you said therapy won't work, but I think some kind of discussion with a professional about your life and what led to become anxious is helpful) instead of taking medications because the side effects made me worse. I realized the hard way my anxiety was more of a trauma trigger and social phobia than solely a matter of brain chemicals (but that could be the reason for some people)

No. 1235723

I mean, therapy is designed to figure that stuff out. Agree on the meds though. Drugging yourself till you feel nothing isn’t a healthy or sustainable solution to social anxiety.

No. 1235954

social anxiety isnt an actual diagnosis people on tumblr came up with that amd it caught on

No. 1235999

Can people like you stop shitting up this thread? We're in our corral for a reason. Fuck off to cow boards if you wanna be a bitch

No. 1236040

Wah wah wah

No. 1236154

File: 1655986405668.jpg (8.06 KB, 450x450, earbuds.jpg)

So i'm hoping at some point to be assessed for autism, but the system in my country (Switzerland) is very confusing. You never know what's covered or how much something costs until you get the bills for it. For example I paid 1600 overall for STD testing, a UTI diagnosis and consulting a doctor about sleeping issues, even though my health insurance was deductible after 300 I ended up paying way more myself, for what reason I don't know.

My point is that it would be for me, with my management skills, very difficult to see through being diagnosed and possibly very expensive. But I got tinnitus 2 years ago and found out that people with sensitive hearing are much more likely to get it, which I know I have because people are amazed at things I pick up on, but I hate it. I feel like a rabbit listening out for predators, it's constantly on and I can't turn it off and relax, like I HAVE to listen to the bullshit a loud group of kids are saying on the bus. As an aside, I bought pic related which dampen frequencies and make sounds not so abrasive, it's not a miracle worker but for me it helps on a night out.

Anyway,I do suspect I have it. From my mum asking what's wrong with me through the years when I was a kid (which is messed up in hindsight, if she really thought something was wrong then get me help instead of shaming me maybe?), to just a year ago when a frenemy colleage told me that other coworkers thought that there's something missing on my part when I talk to them, and honestly despite being a hard worker I was on thin ice because people generally didn't like me. I feel like I never fit in, and i'm too stupid, too sensitive and I suppose too abrasive.

Point is, what would a diagnosis really do if I were to get it? Like with tinnitus I found out that the only therapy is to reframe it and accept the condition as is because there's no cure. Is it the same for autism if you're generally high functioning? Are they just like "love yourself <3" if you're not having daily meltdowns and not being fired from every job? Because in that case I feel it wouldn't be worth risking the cost of the process.

No. 1236158

It’s like even anxiety or panic attacks isn’t. You can have generalized anxiety but it will be called that and you can have an anxiety disorder that’s exasperated by social situations or a panic disorder that is triggered by social situations, but it won’t be labeled social anxiety.

No. 1236160

Pretty much. There’s not a lot of resources or help for adults especially adult women with autism. I’ve found a lot of help talking and relating to other women on the spectrum and got more out of it then my diagnosis unfortunately. Have you tried partial noise canceling ear buds. I use them. They can take a bit to get used to

No. 1236180

I don't know about other countries but a psychiatrist diagnosed me with social phobia which is basically the same thing

No. 1236209

your valid, the other anon can go eat crap.
Actual social anxiety is hell and very similar to paranoia and delusions.
Sadly there is alot of attention seekers on the internet and social media who want to claim depression, anxiety, autism and Tourette's so then because of them dumb cunts go and accuse people who actually have the disorder of it not ''existing'' or of them having something else.

Every social phobia help site is filled with people who do not have it, people who think just because they are shy or awkward that means they have it.
I remember a person with actual social anxiety made a post on those sites about being afraid of what they think because they get delusions about people reading their thoughts and everyone told them they must be schizo when in fact what they described is normal for people with severe social phobia.

Social anxiety is very similar to delusions and paranoia the only difference is they are self-aware, but most people think this disorder means shyness due to the fact that the majority people who claim to have it are just shy or attention seeking people.

No. 1236219

What the fuck are you retards talking about? Social anxiety disorder is listed as such in the DSM-V and has been recognized to commonly co-occur with ADHD for a long time.

Paranoid delusions are not a feature of social anxiety disorder. That person was, in fact, a schizo.

No. 1236226

do you know how severe anxiety works like , it literally clouds your mind and rational. Someone experiencing severe phobia definitely can get delusional but the difference between them and the schizo is that they are self-aware while they are having those thoughts.

No. 1236300

Then it's not a delusion.

No. 1236529

Who doesn’t have social anxiety?

No. 1236732

Does anyone else have trouble with saying thank you? Or like not knowing when to say it? I got called out for being rude as a kid because I didn't know when to say thank you at proper times. Then I doubled-down on it hard by saying thank you to literally everything to the point where it annoyed people. Now I'm back to not knowing and I trip up for a lot of things. Like if someone is helping me for an extended period of time I will think that saying thank you in the beginning or showing gratitude in other ways is enough but no, I have to say it a bunch of times for it to count? I've been called selfish for not saying thank you enough and I legitimately did not even realize it when I thought I was doing ok

And another thing I ran into as well is a shared server with a friend that has regular streams, I will pop in and watch and then leave. But my friend called me out for leaving without saying "thank you for the stream". I don't even see why this is necessary? It's just someone projecting a fucking movie and takes no effort, it isn't a personal one on one favor. I don't understand the formality. I never really say much when I'm watching anything and there are a bunch of other people there so I really don't see the point in why I have to. Now in other servers with streams I get super anxious about coming off as selfish or rude for just watching and then dipping. Do I really need to say thanks for the stream every single time? Aaaaaa

No. 1236779

anyone else super aware of the cars around you when driving? like yeah, you have to be aware while driving, but I'm so hyper focused about the music I'm playing, how loud it is at certain points in driving, what the other people in cars are doing, their impression of me. then I get home and I feel incredibly weird and I never want to drive again.

same thing with going to stores, I feel like I look incredibly spaced out and distant in my eyes, and the social interactions I have are kind of weird and artificial, then I get in my car and overthink everything that I did in the store. I dont know

No. 1236909

Yeah, I have the same thank you issues. Either too much or not enough.

Your friend is being extra about the streaming thing though. I've never seen anyone that the host for that

No. 1236958

Nona, you should know how sensitive autists can be to certain things. I've been diagnosed with autism since I was 13, and I actually started working with autistic children at a special school for them.
The picture is hideous. It bothers me a lot. It has kept me from posting in this thread since it was made. Pls don't bully autists for being autistic.

No. 1237030

File: 1656040232684.jpg (76.26 KB, 1024x852, ESe9edoXYAAsx9e.jpg)

No. 1237055

Replying to a month old post like a true autist

No. 1240578

I wonder if my normie friend is catching on that I'm 'tistic. He made some joke yesterday that really should have been extremely obvious to me, but wasn't. I wonder if he thinks I'm playing stupid or thinks Im actually stupid.

No. 1240864

I’d just like to thank the anon(s) who brought up the difference between emotional empathy and cognitive empathy. It perfectly encapsulates something I’ve been struggling with for years but never had the words for. Why isn’t any of this in the books I was recommended when I got my diagnosis?

No. 1243367

Are you abusing ADHD meds or just regular substances, cuz if it's the latter then same. Though i don't want it to end and im not suffering. I can happily say i have it under control even though i indulge more often than recommended (i can say that since i was a legit addict a couple of years ago and for me quitting totally could never work, but reducing the amount and frequency did)

No. 1245080


romania or italy ?

No. 1245322

seeing all the "neurodivergent" cows online and in my personal life really makes me wish i never told anyone about being autistic. i got diagnosed late in life but always knew something was wrong with me since i struggled so much socially, with expressing my thoughts and emotions, and bang my head really hard against the wall or floor until i almost pass out when i get overstimulated. while im glad to know what is "wrong" with me, i'd rather them not treat me like a stupid infant anymore and just see me as a freak/weirdo like they did before. tl;dr i don't think i'm going to disclose to anyone else that i'm a sperg.

No. 1245325

90% of them aren’t even ND and probably bullied people like us in school. Just the cherry. I don’t tell anyone anymore. Secretly trying to acquire a friend group of actual adult high functioning spergs who aren’t socially media obsessed is tiring.

No. 1245335

ayrt, i've basically given up on that. every "neurodiverse" person i meet, i cannot relate to at all. they claim to be autistic but exhibited none of the behaviors or went through any of the discrimination and abuse i suffered. when i mention my ARFID i just get told "just try new foods!!!! it's fun!!!" as if i haven't been trying to for over 2 decades since it manifested when i was a fucking toddler. it seems every normie is trying to call themselves autistic, even my childhood friend who bullied me relentlessly for being "weird and cringe" when we were teens is now saying she is self diagnosing as autistic (i have known her since age 3, the only thing she has is a severe case of BPD). this is kind of becoming an unhinged rant but i just wish i could meet someone i could relate to on any level.

No. 1245341

I feel like everyone on the internet claiming to have ADHD/ADD has made me completely unsure if I have it myself when people have suggested I might. I can't tell if I just can't focus because the world we live in is incredibly distracting, or my brain is weird.

Same. Either people are terminally online and treat it like a cringe baby club, or non-internet normies pity me as if I were one of those nonverbal autistic kids. I used to explain it to people specifically because of the food thing like >>1245335 , but I gave up and just have to deal with people thinking I'm a picky eater because I haven't tried.

No. 1245373

Christ the amount of people who don’t understand AFRAID kills me. Like yes I enjoy being able to eat one side of potatoes for 12 hours because I was so overstimulated I couldn’t handle the sensation of food and eating. It never occurred to me I could just put food in my mouth and swallow?
You rant all you want. I’ll listen. Literally the only reason I haven’t given up is I’ve met one or two women who I get on with and we understand each other. That type of connection is unmatchable in mixed ND and non ND friendships. But I will judge self diagnosing at this point. If you SD we can’t be friends. It’s the fastest way to dodge red flags. No one I know who’s actually autistic is quick to share it or proud of it.

No. 1245782

What do you anons think of the moids with ASD who have sociopathic/narcissistic traits? Do you think they’re incorrectly diagnosed and actually psychos or is this just a moid thing? I’ve seen how coddled these scrotes are firsthand and can’t say that I have any sympathy for them given what young girls with ASD go through.

No. 1246115

I WISH I hyperfocused on my current projects, but no. I have procastination-hyperfocused on bingewatching, wikiwalking about things that make my interest adrenaline jump, and now lolcow as I have discovered this place and find it speaking to me a lot. I'm working with my doc on medication, but so far my body just gets used to the medicine if it's working. The first few days of the latest one were miraculously amazing, I was in total control of myself and managed even cooking without the normal extra burden I have with that gigantic task. This adhd really is a journey to tame…

No. 1246123

I fucking hate the current trend of "ADHD/ADD" accounts on the social media. Really reeks from pathologizing all behavior for own profit with their "buy my book 'You have ADHD if…'!" totally professionally (not) accurate merch advertizing.

Delete Post [ ]
[Return] [Catalog]
[ Rules ] [ ot / g / m ] [ pt / snow / w ] [ meta ] [ Matrix ] [ Discord ]