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No. 806483
>>806376yes please! I like the idea of this.
I used to struggle with this when I was younger and realizing that this Body is the only chance I have at being alive pretty much did it for me at some point.
These helped me to not let the dysmorphic feelings worsen when I was younger. I get that it‘s harder for people with more severe bd or a bad social situation.
Don‘t obsess over ‘flaws‘ and think about the fact that most people who start surgically altering their Body can’t stop.
See how we can become
Victims of our own Mind and try to find deeper understanding and Caution with that. Distract yourself from picking at flaws too much, you probably have something better to do and if you don’t you really have to find something asap! Express yourself and see that you have the Power to create something beautiful with your own hands.
See how Humans are basically Monkeys with anxiety and too much imagination and feel slightly embarrassed about it.
No. 806489
>>806375I went through a process of accepting I just exist. None of that "say love yourself, and you're perfect and beautiful!!" bs. Just being neutral to your body. Something that helped a lot is, when I walk around, I don't stare rudely but I do look at people. Once you observe the people around you realize we all kind of look average, in a good way.
Losing a pickme behavior from early teens is also a huge step. I do not hate or judge other women (unless they did a very bad action I guess).
And as anon said, not taking selfies, but more pics of cute things.
No. 806515
My body dysmorphia started as a teen by looking at famous tumblr/instagram girls. During puberty I gained weight, got acne, didn't know how to take care of myself and was overwhelmed with how "ugly" and different I was compared to my friends and the girls I saw on the Internet.
By the time I was 15 I developed severe social anxiety because of my looks, never left the house (except for school) and had a list of surgeries I wanted to get done.
I don't really remember what happened exactly, but at some point I started feeling neutral towards "bodies/faces goals" and had this very defined feeling of "they look good but they aren't me" in the sense that I'm my own person. I was born with this face and this body, that's all. Simple as that. This anon put it better
>>806489 Other than that, I don't use instagram or makeup that I feel changes my features too much (foundation, contour, lip liners, etc) and don't take selfies.
Understanding that we have so much to offer other than our looks gives me peace, I try to do activities related to my intellectual, spiritual and social sides, that caring too much about how I look is meaningless, nowadays I only care about being healthy and comfortable
No. 806518
>>806502This. I always thought I was a really ugly teen but now when I look back at photos of my awkward years I realize I was a cute nerdy teen.
I think lockdown has made me love my face a lot more. I put on some weight but I will lose it when life starts again.
I'm at peace with what I look like. I don't want to be beautiful anymore. It might be easy to say cause I'm not ugly, just average.
No. 806560
File: 1621004863336.gif (1.87 MB, 312x390, 1605967014727.gif)
I was born with a fucked up pituitary gland so I had a growth hormone deficiency as a young child and already looked way skinnier and shorter than other kids my age as soon as I entered primary school. This and the fact that I was one of the very few non white kids at school made me a target for bullies who'd make fun of me or beat me up. I had to take growth hormone injections on a daily basis for years but even if it kinda worked I still look younger than I am. Then I had skin problems besides acne as a teenager so I didn't dare using anything other than shampoo on my hair to not make my scalp burn even more, so my hair was always a curly mess.
I don't hate how I look by myself and never really did, but I do know from these past experiences that people WILL judge others by their looks a lot more than they would admit so there are times when I get very self-conscious, like when I have to prepare myself for a job interview or other specific events. There are even points where I had people treat me like a huge self-hating perpetual victim so when I asked for a proper treatment for my skin problems to a (very incompetent) dermatologist or asked for info to my endocrinologist they'd just say I'm just anxious and should get plastic surgery for my very small breasts instead of answering my questions, all because taxpayers could pay for it. I'm actually at this point where I wish I never had my treatment for the hormone deficiency, I'd look "weird" and be treated like shit by people who think who'd think I'm way younger than I am anyway just like now, but at least I wouldn't have to experience periods and I'd probably be able to earn unemployment benefits.
tldr; I had health issues that made me look a certain way and wouldn't care at all if most people around me would also stop caring, so not sure if concerns count as dysphoria or not.
No. 806668
File: 1621017456688.jpg (15.17 KB, 357x349, th.jpg)
I start hating my body when I hit puperty, it was super scary and I hated everything about me. I am shorter and have more hair on my body than the most woman where I live. So classmates made fun of me for looking like an homless person, or that I should have been a boy. I only showered on total darkness so I did not have to see my body.
The one thing that helped me was a sentence that I read "You are a ghost drvining a meat robot made out of stardust." Which lead me to the though that my body has no fault in being that 'ugly' because I look just normal. It is a thing without any feelings. I then made a statement to my body: "You aren't getting sick and I will do my best to keep you healthy." Now I see my body as a machine I have to give good fuel, do some sort of activity to keep it healthy, clean it, etc. If I ever would get sick and/or someone had to see me nacked I will not live with this shame. So I decided to live alone for the rest of my days and do my everday routine. Works for most of the time, just sometime when my period starts I get depressed over my body.
No. 806678
File: 1621018420845.jpg (185.02 KB, 1280x1280, tumblr_pd1ug12ZmJ1rihoc2o7_128…)
I grew up mildly chubby and surrounded by stick thin girls so teenage me was absolutely convinced I was a fat sack of shit. Only ever wore super baggy clothes, developed an eating disorder, the works. Now when I look at pics of me at my 'fattest', I realize I've never been even close to overweight or chunky. I always had a nice figure but teen me just couldn't tell. It's crazy how your perception can change over the years.
When it comes to my face I have my moments where I seriously hate my features and think my nose/nasolabial folds/what have you look monstrous. But eh, eventually I have to make peace with my face. I look fine, it's no use to think I'm hideous, but I'll also never be super gorgeous and that's just how it is.
>>806641I'm glad it didn't cause an ED before but try to keep on top of things because it kind of sounds like you're still at risk to develop one. I understand how you feel, so please make sure to remind yourself that you don't actually look like how you perceive yourself.
No. 806695
File: 1621019754770.jpg (114.22 KB, 769x960, 1580801107220.jpg)
I was diagnosed with BDD in my early twenties, although my symptoms started in childhood I never got to meet with a counselor until I was independent. I could spend hours in front of a mirror analyzing my face and breaking down etc. Or taking selfies just so I could Photoshop my face and plan my future plastic surgeries. I dropped out of university because going out and being seen and having to speak and draw attention to myself gave me panic attacks. Some days I would drive to work only to call in sick because I mirror checked before going in. I was also obsessed with the idea of being disfigured in an accident or brutal attack, I would imagine this shit happening to me basically all day long and wishing it would happen so when people looked at me they'd see that something terrible had happened to me instead of seeing me as an alien's terrible attempt at human taxidermy. I even seriously considered attempting diy cosmetic surgery. It was really obnoxious and I feel bad for all people that had to interact with me in peak BDD mode. Counseling helped me develop coping skills and I learned how to pull myself out of an episode and even stop them before they started. I was able to accept being ugly and was satisfied with that. I assumed I'd be dealing with my disorder for the rest of my life but at least it was manageable and I could function like a normal person. Then one day the curse was just lifted? The bitch in the mirror is a total babe. It was a really surreal awakening experience, like when I saw myself in my dreams I was beautiful and I thought I was a retard for imagining myself that way, and then suddenly I could see that beautiful me in real life, and I see her every day now. A few years ago I could name 10 cosmetic surgeries I had planned, thank god I never went through with them because now I am in love with myself and I definitely would have regretted botching my adorable face. Oh yeah and I was able to go back to school and finished my degree at the top of my class, I was finally able to prove my potential after my brain stopped the crazy self gore loop. Feels good man. Hang in there BDD-chans, you'll be free someday too.
No. 806964
>>806962I've felt this way.
I feel like I don't even know what plastic surgery would fix my face or what makeup suits me, like I need someone to just be straight with me and tell me what to fix. I know I'm ugly in that I hate my features but when I try to pinpoint what's wrong I can't even really "see" it correctly, only that I know it's ugly. For example depending on the day my nose is too big or too flat, my lips are too small or too big, my skin is sallow/sick-looking or artificially orange. I'm just trying to get over it and live my life.
No. 807018
I know this is not the "right" answer, but fuck it. If you really, truly hate something about yourself and you know that it is honestly just about that physical thing and not just something you'll change just to end up hating something else…fix it. I had always hated my tits. They were somehow small yet deflated, had this weird banana shape, and were like 90% areola I shit you not. I saved up, got a boob job, and I don't want to die every time someone suggests going to the pool. It's fucking amazing. It was one little thing about myself but fixing it fixed how I felt about ME.
>>806883This is so true. I always had people ask me when I'd get my nose done, even as a teenager. After I got my tits done, it was all "So you're getting your nose done next, right?" Truth is, I never fucking hated my nose. Everyone else hated my nose, but I had no problem with it. It messed with me for such a long time before I just had this stage where I realized that my nose is not ugly, it's just not a white nose, and a white nose is what people have been taught to consider beautiful.
No. 807025
my mother has always been exceedingly skinny, since i was a child. in her mid 50s now she's complaining that she's now 140 lbs at 5'9", "fatter" than she's ever been. that combined with her narc personality and abuse led me to have exceedingly poor self image. I went through a fatty phase in middle and high school and was bullied for a brief time by other girls. I had huge tits during puberty, but those fell off once I went through my high school anachan phase.
I was an overexerciser and undereater with anachan tendencies who managed to stay under my goal weight, but I wasn't even happy with that. in my late teens I developed a severe case of pneumonia that damaged my immunity. After that, I began to eat normally again, gained an inch in lost height that'd been stunted by my ed. Nowadays I eat like a dumpster fire as compensation for years of depriving my body of nutrients. I haven't gained a ton of weight, maybe 20-30 lbs on top of my lowest weight, but it feels that way. The body dysmorphia tends to fluctuate. I've gotten better in hating my body less, but still a very long way to go. Am an awkward pear shape, with normal to slightly short legs, big thighs. esp in a family of tall women with apple bodies, long legs, and decent sized tits, it's a curse, you feel like a stubby dwarf. Part of me really yearns to be scrawny again, the other part of me loves to eat too much and doesn't want to give it up. Thankless as I may sound I am happy about one thing: I have a big fat ass, which is a curse as it as a blessing.
As for my face, it's definitely gotten worse. Can remember the days before crazy plastic surgery trends and everyone and their mother photoshopping themselves into a blowup doll. I was more secure back then. Dare I say I thought I was so much prettier in high school back when I was skelly, and my face was thinner. Having somewhere between a oval and heart shape face, you always feel like your features are quashed. It's a revolving door of abuse, and I flip flop. lips are too small, eyes are too big, philtrum is too long, cheeks are too chubby, face is too oily, etc. I've found comfort in looking at people who resemble me but then I see some of them get bashed or called ugly, and I resort right back to insulting myself. I'm considered plain janey on an objective level and I should be thankful for that, but instead it makes me bemoan how much I could change my boring face if I just shelled out thousands to botch myself before I'm 30. Then I realize how annoying that would be. I want to be in the entertainment industry doing behind the scenes stuff and I'm afraid even as a crew or PR person they'll try and bully me into getting surgery.
No. 807102
>>807043turning 30 doesn't help. Still hate myself.
Thinking about boob job for a long time now as for many, many other beauty surgeries. But I know it would not change the fact, that I am ugly. I would only lie to others, a reason why I don't use make up.
>>806695Don't really trust counselor. There are too many money hungry ones. How did you know it was a good one?
No. 807152
For me it started when I was 10. I was wearing a long underwear shirt, which are tight and long sleeved, and my grandma said something regarding the fact that I needed to lose weight because I looked fat. I was 10…and I wasn't even a fat kid, I just had a tummy, I was still growing..
Then, when I was..11? 12? My friends dad called my nose a "Roman nose" and kinda laughed about it, to my face. When I got upset he tried to play it off. My dad was there at the time and told him to stfu but the damage was done kek. My nose has a bump on the bridge of it, I posted a pic in the plastic surgery thread before. I absolutely detest my nose to this day. Then in grade 7, also when I was 12, I had a "friend" who made a point to make fun of my nose. She would ask me if it was broken, or if I had broken it before, she would say it was crooked and that it had a bump on it, as if I somehow was unaware of this fact. She also told me I had a mustache kek, I WAS 12 and was (still am) extremely pale and so the 7 hairs above my lip qualified her to tell me I had a fucking mustache.
Yeah I'm a mess and still struggling with my hatred for my nose and body kek. Luckily I recovered from my ED but the thoughts never really go away nor the unhealthy habits, you just learn to manage them in a way that's not detrimental to your physical health. To me, the worst part of having an ED is the effect it has on your mentality regarding food and appearances, and it's pretty much intertwined with my BDD
No. 807187
>>807018When I went to the Hospital for orthopedic surgery the fucking surgeon asked me if I was going to get my nose "fixed" in the future. I ended up not going through with the surgery but I carried that around with me for a long time.
Luckily I told my mom years later and she was appaled that someone could think something like this. She called it the
our family name hump. Which may seem like a small thing, but it makes me feel connected to my family and it helped me lay that thought to rest.
No. 807272
File: 1621091160871.jpg (196.16 KB, 1080x1332, b0867ad3704a2ccd327b6493797ad2…)
Oh man, I don't know where to start. I haven't been diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder, but body dysmorphic symptoms have always been a major background vibration all my life, starting from like age 7 when I was constantly anxious about my protruding belly and ungrown boobs. And don't even get me started about how much I despised my beautiful nose and wanted it cut down to size. I remember grown-ups raving about how dolls like barbies and bratz make kids mentally ill, but boy did they straight up ignore the rest of y2k porn-chic pornsick bullshit that oozed out of every piece of media. It didn't help that girls my age were so stupidly anal about fitting these ridiculous standards, because the place where we lived childhood just wasn't a thing separate from teen angst and 'adult' stuff.
I have way less anxiety about my weight or my waistline these days, but for sure I still struggle with my skin and face. I've had laugh lines since 14, I think. At least, that's when I discovered them. My face has always looked kinda 'old' or mature compared to my peers. My face is also pretty expressive; it's not like a 'quiet face' if that makes sense. I actually look better when I'm smiling or doing something highly energetic with my face, instead of just staring blankly or giving a shut-up toothless smile.
But because I'm so conscious about my wrinkles, it's hard to allow myself to be the dynamic, expressive, high-energy person I really am. I still find myself obsessing over how 'old' my face will start looking if any of the lines deepen, which is some major unfair bs considering these lines were there since 10 years ago already. Despite aging 'well' in terms of not changing much even after being hit with disordered eating, insomnia and moderate alcohol abuse, it's like I never even had a chance as this Bernadette Button to begin with.
My body dysmorphic fixations seem to have a resentful undercurrent, as I pin my fears and frustrations on my surroundings - I feel wronged by other people and society for only being valued for something elusive I wasn't even supposed to be born with. This is something I've identified and am trying to resolve within myself. Here's the thing though, all of you listen up: it's a REAL FACT that our culture is messed up and perpetuates toxic ideas. But as someone going through dysmorphia, you have to remind yourself that people in general feel the same pressure, want to reject it and don't judge you wholly as a person for your perceived imperfections. Most people probably won't even notice it and even if they did, they wouldn't care because it'd be just a feature to them. You might be rare for having such intense feelings or reservations, but even then you're really not alone. We're all groomed to be dysmorphic because that's profitable, and you just happen to be less resistant to this social toxin. Your anger is valid, but don't let it consume your whole reality.
My way of keeping my perception in check is to opt for neutral language and descriptions when paying attention to my physical self. I've also come to question the coherence and validity of what our mainstream culture considers 'youthful' and thus valuable, since I've looked like I do ever since youth (unpolished, blunt and powerful perhaps), and I'm not unique in this regard. If you find yourself too exhausted to constantly grapple with semantic reality, that's what role models are for. Hone on your ability to admire women who are alike you, are further along than you, who you can sympathize with etc. You'll find yourself eventually becoming much less resentful of people who supposedly have a 'better' appearance than you do. Hell, you'll start to forgive the people who didn't even comprehend the evil they were putting on you before, through copypasted expectations they never had to even think about twice.
No. 807508
File: 1621112765798.png (195.9 KB, 703x560, ugly.png)
I'm feeling a lot of shame over my BDD, like I'd feel whiny if I dare to say anything too negative about myself as it is but I want to open up to a couple of close friends about it just to lighten the load a bit since I got the diagnosis just recently but… I don't know what to expect?
Do you look for support in your friends anons?
How do you do it without making it sound like you are fishing for compliments?
No. 811959
File: 1621570306370.jpeg (64 KB, 822x415, 7430D210-E24E-43B2-BF06-6F5BDB…)
I don’t know if this is body dysmorphia or if I’m just delulu.
When I look at myself in the mirror I’m perfect, sure, my nose is a bit “droopy” but when I’m in front of the mirror everything is harmonious. Since I take care of myself, my skin looks beautiful in the mirror, it looks bright and speckles. I do have a bit of dark circles around my eyes, I think I look nice with them as well I can spend minutes just staring at myself and practicing expressions and such.
Then I take a picture of myself, I look pretty nice, I try to take pictures with a natural light rather than with artificial light, I use filters that won’t change my face too much because I really, really like how I look in the mirror and sometimes I really look pretty.
But then, someone takes a picture of me, they always say the same thing:
>you look so pretty here!
And I look like a monster, I always look huge, I know I’m fat, I can see that in the mirror but in the mirror i always look pretty, regardless of my weight. My head looks really small, my face, even with makeup on, looks like it doesn’t belong to me, I look like a witch’s caricature, my skin looks too shiny and greasy, my recessive chin looks ridiculous and my arms look humongous when in the mirror they look harmonious with the rest of my body.
I workout as much as I can, I avoid taking many pictures with others and I try to take care of myself as much as I can. I hope I can someday look at the mirror and look at a picture taken by someone else without finding any differences.
No. 812235
File: 1621604739264.jpg (3.64 KB, 155x275, 1614016368349.jpg)
>>807304Last month i cut off all my hair and now i look like a dumb fat sjw, I can't leave the house without a wig and 4 layers of clothes, because im afraid of how my reflection looks. It's gotten to the point where im scared to shower because what if i see my body.
The lack of hair exposes all my bad features. Especially how fat my face is.
I 've had long hair all my life and I feel like someone stole my body and im now inhabiting some disgusting troll. Not to mention my skin is breaking out badly from the biotin im taking. I actually kept the bag of hair i cut off and have tried to tape it back onto my head(like a fucking lunatic).It all feels like a nightmare. I quit my job and im going to hide in my room until it all grows back.Not to mention I've been having dreams of all my hair growing back and whenever I wake up i want kms. feels like im in hell. FUCK every single idiot who says "just cut all your hair off" its not freeing i feel like a fucking abomination.
No. 812322
File: 1621614727768.jpg (3.4 MB, 4000x3000, PicsArt_05-21-11.29.23.jpg)
>>812275nayrt but damn, your harsh response actually makes my dysmorphic ass feel a bit better. I'm the opposite – I think I look disgustingly fat when I look in reflective surfaces or look down at my body, but when I see myself on webcam for work or in photos I'm always startled by how bony I look. Trying to be realistic about my body shape is hard because I know I'm not truly skinny but I have to accept I'm not fat either.
I'm diagnosed, but I still have thoughts like, "It's not really BDD, my brain is just trying to cope with/reject the fact that I'm ugly and fat."
The weirdest thing I do to calm down is write little comics where the characters are representations of my ideal self and how I see myself (both drawn very exaggerated) and make them talk to each other. It's been helping me take this less seriously and also reconcile the 2 clashing unrealistic images of myself that are constantly terrorizing my thoughts. I'm phoneposting so this is probably spaced out like shit but I hope it helps someone.
No. 812347
>>812342Same but with my brothers and cousins, both male.
They always tell me that I look ugly and that I’m fat and such, and I honestly just feel frustrated after all, because even if I workout, eat less and drink more water, they always say that I look horrible, frumpy, gross or just fat, sometimes they also tell me stuff like
>big deal, you will start your diet and give up like always>lol look at you trying to workoutAnd I end up giving up everything, their comments about my appearance are always negative, so I will just forget about it at some point, I really need to disregard them because they just want me to look like the women they want to fuck, and that’s not what I want, I just want to be healthy and to wear whatever I want.
No. 812367
Yesterday I was testing zoom on a new laptop by starting a video call with my old laptop which was next to me. So as soon as I accept the call I'm greeted with my face from a sideways angle I normally never see myself at, and my god I knew my nose was big but I had no idea it was THAT ugly and huge.
It seriously kind of shocked me, to think I've been walking around with a nose like that all this time without realizing it. Nobody ever told me my face was this tragic so I just lived my life thinking I only looked slightly unfortunate at most.
Ignorance truly is bliss anonitas.
>>812329This sounds about right. The camera's depth of field and lack of a 3D image will still affect the accuracy, but it seems like the best way. I look worse in a video than in the mirror, especially if I'm talking, but I look much better in motion than in (most) pictures.
No. 812430
File: 1621624967271.jpg (30.01 KB, 710x407, images.jpeg-7.jpg)
I have a problem where I don't know if it's just an issue of where I lived and to an overall audience im actually attractive or if american men are just playing with me, im the furthest thing away from my country's beauty standards, I was the accessory ugly friend to a Narc Stacy for years, I was fuck and dump material because of my body and that was it.
And then I went to study abroad in the States and it's like a switch flipped, suddenly I'm an 9/10 goddess and men go out of their way to do shit for me, Im absolutely terrified this is just a ruse because im foreign and seen as "easy".
No. 812445
>>812430This might be a social class thing.
Might be less to do with your body and more to do with the way you carry yourself and the way you dress and the way you behave yourself.
I know when I went abroad it was easy for me to fake being middle class, which improved my dating prospects quite a bit.
No. 812451
File: 1621627478821.jpg (31.23 KB, 400x400, images.jpeg-18.jpg)
>>812437For reference im Brazilian and specially where I live on the southwest the beauty standard is pretty much looking as european as possible (blonde hair, light eyes), thick-fit and with a beach tan.
I am extremely racially ambiguous, with dark hair and eyes and the stereotypical latina look but deathly pale skin (got called "corpse girl" back when i was bullied in school) i also used to be underweight until the pandemic.
>>812439>>812440Insofar I haven't had to deal with being fucked and dumped at all though honestly I take a pretty long time to "put out" so that might ward off fuckboys, all my relationships abroad have been long term and ended over normal relationship shit im also currently engaged to my american bf.
>>812445I've actually been pretty well off most of my life, went to a private school and all that, though honestly im pretty sure my body language screams SPERG.
>>812441I also didn't study somewhere like LA or NYC so that also may make a difference.
picrel some brazilian influencer.
No. 812472
>>812451Aah yeah. As an American I've heard a
lot of shitty American guys fetishize Brazilian women and latinas in general as sexy, "fiery"/passionate but also traditionally feminine. Like they'll be dynamos in bed and provide fun banter but then they'll also pop out 5 children and cook all your meals. Those stereotypes often come with latina features even when you're lighter skinned and can definitely play a role in guys wanting to hook up. Assuming your fiance treats you much better and sees you as a person rather than some gross checklist.
No. 812710
i always had kind of low self esteem but the things i used to hate about myself were mostly things that could be fixed easily, like dying my hair, letting my hair grow, buying certain clothes etc. what truly fucked me up was when instagram fame became a thing, big lips and big butts became desirable. for the first time i was looking at myself and finding flaws that could be fixed with surgery. it's stupid because in a way i was lucky, i never had to feel ugly before because of my features, because of my nose or lips or anything. but now the extreme was popular, the perfect was in, so ofc my lips were suddenly too small, my butt was too small, my face too asymmetrical. i was always fantasising about surgeries, wondering how i could perfect myself. i never got anything done though. instead i got more into pages that would expose what those perfect instagram models really look like. i would watch people on instagram go way overboared, probably because their own view of themselves had gotten so distorted that even though they were absolutely filled up with fillers, they would always be able to find a mistake. i could probably have taken this road if i had the money and if i had not snapped out of this obsession with being perfect. suddenly i was listening to friends say they wanted fillers and this and that and i would just get sad because whatever they thought was wrong with themselves, would mostly just be visible to themselves and no one else. it was sad because i used to be the same. i think if you fixate too much on yourself, you can always find mistake. no one is perfect. no one has no skin texture or lines, no one has a perfectly symmetrical face, and it's not possible to achieve without ending up looking uncanny valley, without getting even harsher on yourself and seeing even more mistake. i still have moments where i'll find a flaw and feel bad, but i'm happy that i'm also able to see that trying to fix the flaws won't solve anything for me
No. 812746
>>812712this. I got my under eye area filled and a small amount of filler in my lips, slowly build up over years. I look so much fresher and completely natural and I don't really want to change anything else. Maybe in the future when I'm 40+ I'll get some botox/thread lifting.
My body is a different thing, I would never get a boob job or something like that. I just don't care enough lol. tbh all I want is to be a skinny fit legend and objectively I'm quite close to my goal but I can't see it. I look huge in the mirror and I store most body fat in my legs, although I'm at a bmi of 19.5 and I work out 6 days a week. so annoying!! losing 6lbs would probably be enough but I have a baby and I need tons of food because I still breastfeed.
No. 813770
>>812451Aren't most Brazilians brown tho?
I've even met a Brazilian who i think might be chinese or Japanese.
No. 813932
File: 1621807097304.jpg (7.44 KB, 201x250, images.jpg)
I've had 8 plastic surgeries. I spend huge amounts on botox and fillers, clothes, hair and makeup. I won't leave the house unless I feel that I look my absolute best. Last week my mascara looked clumpy but I had to go out, and I wanted to die all day.
Numerous surgeons have rejected me, but I keep going. Now I've finally found a surgeon who wants to do my 9th and 10th surgery. Half of me is stoked, I can't wait. The other sidee of me wishes he'd say no and that no surgeon would accept me ever again so I might be able to feel at peace. I'm embarrassed to share my extreme levels of vanity but I'm living in my own personal hell. So that's my experience with it. Life is torture, nonitas.
No. 813941
>>813932Gotta add: my 9th and 10th surgery are booked and I'm already considering one more. Honestly laughable. The ride never ends.
>>813936I tried therapy for years, anon. I like to consider myself a radfem, although I suppose any true radfem would laugh at someone like me identifying as a radical feminist. I have my reasons for falling into this obsessive-compulsive trap.
No. 814197
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>>806375I mentioned this a bit in the confession thread I think but I feel like I have a weird version of bdd. I don't feel disgust at how I look, as in, I don't think I look ugly or anything. The extreme discomfort with my face (and body) comes from how I don't feel like I fit… it just feels like it should belong to someone I dislike. Kind of like how people can have a punchable face yet that doesn't mean theyre unattractive. I kind of look like an idiot or maybe a slightly mean person? I'm introverted yet have an incredibly "extroverted" body: wide hips and big thighs no matter what weight. I also have naturally arched eyebrows that make me look permanently kind of surprised or happy. I hate it.
No. 814241
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I think I've had some form of (undiagnosed) bdd for years but thought I was just ugly. I know rationally I probably look pretty average but my brain always gave me some sort of fucked up perception of myself. My skin is super pasty pale, basically looks like a corpse. My eye sockets are deep and hollow and I have permanent eye bags. I'm a ginger and have curly hair and while people always complimented the color I never knew how to style it so I cut it all off.
I avoided looking at my face in mirrors until it was dark, even to brush my teeth. The anxiety I had about my looks made me not go outside for days in fear someone would see me. I don't have any pictures of myself saved anywhere because I can't stand to see myself. Still working on that last one but at least I can do the other two above. Ironically one day during a manic phase I starting putting on a ton of makeup highlighting all my worst features and made myself look like a clown though it kinda helped my self esteem?? Like if I cant be beautiful at least I can scare children on the street kek. Idk there's shit I could spend thousands of dollars and time obsessing over to change about myself but I don't have the time, money or energy to do so, so I just 'accepted' the way I am right now.
No. 814861
>>814836Even if you're literally a burn
victim if you stop putting importance on looks you'll still be far happier than the hottest woman ever who worries about hers constantly. People love an excuse not to change though.
No. 815080
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>>814861Ok but it’s not easy, unless you want to be everyone’s, free of charge, life coach, I don’t see what’s keeping you so pressed about some of us feeling like shit about our looks.
I don’t think there’s going to be a huge majority of anons going like
>oh my god, this is all I need to do!!Change doesn’t happen in the blink of an eye, and you spamming the same message for everyone to see, like an absolute tool isn’t of help.
No. 815264
I'm
>>807152this video made me cry lol. I know some anons dislike Dr Dray, but the things she mentions really hit home, and made me feel better about myself. I'd recommend everyone watch it if you suffer with BDD issues
No. 815275
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>>814794you're giving this shitty crackhead outside a walmart type of advise on lolcow? Get over yourself
nonnie.
And it seems you've forgotten that scrotes will literally harass women they don't find attractive. Let us have one place to vent about this shitty existence and go fuck yourself.
No. 815319
>>814861Burn
victims are out of standards though, everyone understands that they went through a horrible traumatic experience and that's it. Same with very deformed people (men will still complain that they're not hot though, and they won't have a love life with them). Also no, burn
victims are not happy and would do anything to go back to who they were before, even if they say the contrary to be strong. So yeah, shitty example.
No. 815370
a few years ago i succeeded in losing 170lbs. i went from 310 to 140. so i’m covered in loose skin. it’s damn near everywhere, face, neck, arms, back, chest, stomach, ass, thighs, etc. after the weight loss i started lifting weights. bodybuilding is now one of my hobbies and main forms of exercise. i have been able to put on a decent amount of muscle thus far but it will never even come close to being enough to “fill out” my loose skin. i’ve been married 12 years and my husband has been supportive of my journey every step of the way. i have broke down many a time and cried to him and wondered how he could even stand to look at me. somehow i found a decent man and he constantly assures me that he is still very much in love with and attracted to me, and he has never acted like he doesn’t. some days the skin doesn’t bother me. other days i can’t bear to look at myself in the mirror. i’ve thought about skin removal surgery but it’s very expensive, the results never really look that great, and people suffer nerve damage from the procedure. so i’m kind of just stuck having to slooooowly accept that this is what my body looks like now. don’t let yourselves become morbidly obese anons, nothing good will come of it.
No. 815377
>>815370How did you lose that weight and how long did it take you?
that's a really big achievement so well done! I hope in the future you can feel better regardless of what you choose to do. You deserve to be proud of your body!
No. 817603
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I feel like I look cute in a weird, rat-faced way, and my laugh kinda fits that too. I think my face looks juvenile in a way, though that may be because I am quite young, but not in a way men would find attractive, idk how to place it but my face hasn't changed ever since I was 3
No. 817868
Just saw a tiktok of a girl using FaceApp to edit her selfies; she said she uses it on every picture she posts. It straightened and lightened her hair, put perfect instabaddie makeup on her, gave her a different eye shape, gave her a sharp jaw, made her nose smaller, made her teeth straighter, and made her skin perfect…and it all looked so fucking real. She showed how to edit videos of herself to be skinnier and prettier, too. It was so fucking scary, from the fact that she thought it was a cute thing to show off instead of a dystopian reality, to the hundreds of people saying they do it too in the comments..how many people do I compare myself to that don’t even exist? Knowing that with like, 3 minutes work from an app I could look exactly how I wanted, but only in a picture? I feel sick. I don’t feel real.
No. 817898
>>817868Link?
I use FaceApp to mostly just act as a guide for how to better my appearance. It made me realize I don't apply my foundation correctly and that I needed to grow my eyebrows out. I looks so much better, it's insane. I still get tempted to use it for my photos that I post, which I've done a few times, but I'm trying to refrain because already I'm getting to the point where all their filters don't alter my appearance in a way I like anymore. It has made me think of getting a small lip lift, I wish my upper lip were thicker so I didn't have to line my lips.
No. 817910
I'm pretty sure I have BDD. I used to be ana. I feel odd because I get compliments all the time when I go out or guys will offer to pay for things, that kind of stuff, and it's sad how I have to thrive off that validation to feel alright. I know they can't be lying because there's too many, and it's ridiculous to lie about something like that (right?).
I love molly because when I see myself in the mirror then, I feel like I'm seeing myself for the first time. I see this gorgeous, cute, but sexy creature and it amazes me how every part of my body looks complete. It makes me cry thinking about it because I wish I could feel that way about myself all the time. It's just so pure. I'd recommend to anyone struggling, at least it may give you the first taste of loving yourself.
I feel so sick in how I normally obsess over my appearance and feel fat no matter what. I'm 24 and I'm just like how I was when I was little, how the fuck am I going to grow up. I'm so embarrassed, I will tell my boyfriend my stupid stories about people trying to get my number in the dumbest places and he tells me it's weird how I don't get it that that shit happens a lot to me because I am attractive, and it boggles my mind still. I don't believe I'm part of that camp. I feel average and pathetic at best, like I'm pretending and trying to be up there with actually attractive people, but I'm not, I never will, because that's not who I am.
No. 821092
>>821026Yeah I think I'm ok looking too but pretty sure I'm ugly/average to everyone else.
I feel like it's because I mostly judge my appearance relative to how I've looked in the past? Eg: I had bad acne when I was younger but my skin is clear now so I'm proud of it. But objectively it's not great, I have scarring and pigmentation, I just don't mind because I know it could be so much worse. Also I think the bar is SO HIGH for female beauty. You could have perfectly cute features in every way but there's still endless women much, much better looking and they're the ones people truly find attractive. I was looking at Barbara Palvin's instagram the other day thinking 'how the fuck could I ever be delusional enough to think I'm decent looking when this exists??' lmao.