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File: 1620974567088.jpg (38.91 KB, 465x465, 51ac69076c0077c023407d9e5926d0…)

No. 806375

What is your experience with body dysmorphia/hating how you look in general? How to cope?

No. 806376

Is this the antithesis to the plastic surgery thread?

No. 806483

>>806376
yes please! I like the idea of this.

I used to struggle with this when I was younger and realizing that this Body is the only chance I have at being alive pretty much did it for me at some point.
These helped me to not let the dysmorphic feelings worsen when I was younger. I get that it‘s harder for people with more severe bd or a bad social situation.

Don‘t obsess over ‘flaws‘ and think about the fact that most people who start surgically altering their Body can’t stop.
See how we can become Victims of our own Mind and try to find deeper understanding and Caution with that. Distract yourself from picking at flaws too much, you probably have something better to do and if you don’t you really have to find something asap! Express yourself and see that you have the Power to create something beautiful with your own hands.

See how Humans are basically Monkeys with anxiety and too much imagination and feel slightly embarrassed about it.

No. 806484

This sounds dumb but I'm much happier now that I spend less time in front of the mirror. I don't let myself sit in front of it, and I have forced myself to use barely any makeup so that has cut down on my time in front of the mirror. I don't think my makeup made me look better before anyway it just looked like I was wearing makeup. I use the "don't show me this" feature on my explore page to stop it from showing me beautiful photoshopped makeup artists and I consume more media that involves older women. I'm not a teenage girl anymore, the way society surrounds us with pictures of barely legal girls is messed up.
I also avoid talking selfies. I still take fun group photos with friends where I look awful but those aren't about me so it's okay.

No. 806489

>>806375
I went through a process of accepting I just exist. None of that "say love yourself, and you're perfect and beautiful!!" bs. Just being neutral to your body. Something that helped a lot is, when I walk around, I don't stare rudely but I do look at people. Once you observe the people around you realize we all kind of look average, in a good way.
Losing a pickme behavior from early teens is also a huge step. I do not hate or judge other women (unless they did a very bad action I guess).
And as anon said, not taking selfies, but more pics of cute things.

No. 806502

It really hit me when as an adult I saw a photo of myself from middle school in the height of thinking I was a fat child and being bulimic and…..I was actually really thin. It broke my heart and really shifted my perspective on what I probably really look like. Since then I’ve been relatively neutral when I don’t feel my best and try to appreciate when I do.

No. 806515

My body dysmorphia started as a teen by looking at famous tumblr/instagram girls. During puberty I gained weight, got acne, didn't know how to take care of myself and was overwhelmed with how "ugly" and different I was compared to my friends and the girls I saw on the Internet.
By the time I was 15 I developed severe social anxiety because of my looks, never left the house (except for school) and had a list of surgeries I wanted to get done.
I don't really remember what happened exactly, but at some point I started feeling neutral towards "bodies/faces goals" and had this very defined feeling of "they look good but they aren't me" in the sense that I'm my own person. I was born with this face and this body, that's all. Simple as that. This anon put it better >>806489
Other than that, I don't use instagram or makeup that I feel changes my features too much (foundation, contour, lip liners, etc) and don't take selfies.
Understanding that we have so much to offer other than our looks gives me peace, I try to do activities related to my intellectual, spiritual and social sides, that caring too much about how I look is meaningless, nowadays I only care about being healthy and comfortable

No. 806518

>>806502
This. I always thought I was a really ugly teen but now when I look back at photos of my awkward years I realize I was a cute nerdy teen.

I think lockdown has made me love my face a lot more. I put on some weight but I will lose it when life starts again.

I'm at peace with what I look like. I don't want to be beautiful anymore. It might be easy to say cause I'm not ugly, just average.

No. 806560

File: 1621004863336.gif (1.87 MB, 312x390, 1605967014727.gif)

I was born with a fucked up pituitary gland so I had a growth hormone deficiency as a young child and already looked way skinnier and shorter than other kids my age as soon as I entered primary school. This and the fact that I was one of the very few non white kids at school made me a target for bullies who'd make fun of me or beat me up. I had to take growth hormone injections on a daily basis for years but even if it kinda worked I still look younger than I am. Then I had skin problems besides acne as a teenager so I didn't dare using anything other than shampoo on my hair to not make my scalp burn even more, so my hair was always a curly mess.

I don't hate how I look by myself and never really did, but I do know from these past experiences that people WILL judge others by their looks a lot more than they would admit so there are times when I get very self-conscious, like when I have to prepare myself for a job interview or other specific events. There are even points where I had people treat me like a huge self-hating perpetual victim so when I asked for a proper treatment for my skin problems to a (very incompetent) dermatologist or asked for info to my endocrinologist they'd just say I'm just anxious and should get plastic surgery for my very small breasts instead of answering my questions, all because taxpayers could pay for it. I'm actually at this point where I wish I never had my treatment for the hormone deficiency, I'd look "weird" and be treated like shit by people who think who'd think I'm way younger than I am anyway just like now, but at least I wouldn't have to experience periods and I'd probably be able to earn unemployment benefits.

tldr; I had health issues that made me look a certain way and wouldn't care at all if most people around me would also stop caring, so not sure if concerns count as dysphoria or not.

No. 806640

Until I got out of high school, I thought I was thin and pretty, just thought everyone was bullying me for no reason
Realized as an adult, I am fat and average at the absolute best
So.

No. 806641

I was diagnosed with severe body dysmorphia that I’m amazed did not turn me into an anachan. I’m still affected by it becquae my body just looks so yucky to me, I want to rip apart my fucking breasts and just be stick thin. I also want to wear what I truly want to wear but then I quickly change my mind at the last second and hide my body in a jacket. It really fucks with your mind when people smile and say that you look fine in what you’re wearing but you know that you look like a weird she-beast with big ass hands and feet.

No. 806657

I had a baby a year ago and it made my body so “ugly” I’ve got stretch marks and saggy huge boobs now and for some reason a flatter ass (??!!) I’m working out but I noticed my bone structure when I was hitting puberty and noticed it’s not even really feminine i am an upside down triangle body type I went to junior high in 2012 which is when big booties became a trend and when I started paying more attention to my body. I still have times where I can’t even find anything to wear because I feel like my body is too ugly

No. 806668

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I start hating my body when I hit puperty, it was super scary and I hated everything about me. I am shorter and have more hair on my body than the most woman where I live. So classmates made fun of me for looking like an homless person, or that I should have been a boy. I only showered on total darkness so I did not have to see my body.
The one thing that helped me was a sentence that I read "You are a ghost drvining a meat robot made out of stardust." Which lead me to the though that my body has no fault in being that 'ugly' because I look just normal. It is a thing without any feelings. I then made a statement to my body: "You aren't getting sick and I will do my best to keep you healthy." Now I see my body as a machine I have to give good fuel, do some sort of activity to keep it healthy, clean it, etc. If I ever would get sick and/or someone had to see me nacked I will not live with this shame. So I decided to live alone for the rest of my days and do my everday routine. Works for most of the time, just sometime when my period starts I get depressed over my body.

No. 806678

File: 1621018420845.jpg (185.02 KB, 1280x1280, tumblr_pd1ug12ZmJ1rihoc2o7_128…)

I grew up mildly chubby and surrounded by stick thin girls so teenage me was absolutely convinced I was a fat sack of shit. Only ever wore super baggy clothes, developed an eating disorder, the works. Now when I look at pics of me at my 'fattest', I realize I've never been even close to overweight or chunky. I always had a nice figure but teen me just couldn't tell. It's crazy how your perception can change over the years.

When it comes to my face I have my moments where I seriously hate my features and think my nose/nasolabial folds/what have you look monstrous. But eh, eventually I have to make peace with my face. I look fine, it's no use to think I'm hideous, but I'll also never be super gorgeous and that's just how it is.

>>806641
I'm glad it didn't cause an ED before but try to keep on top of things because it kind of sounds like you're still at risk to develop one. I understand how you feel, so please make sure to remind yourself that you don't actually look like how you perceive yourself.

No. 806686

I grew up doing pretty serious classical ballet training and never had a defined eating disorder but always thought I was borderline obese because every girl I danced with was soooo petite. I was taller than everyone (was/am 5ft9) and my bone structure was just different - specifically I have a wide ribcage and broader shoulders. I eventually quit when I was 17 because I had a severe injury and now looking back I was soooo thin, I have no idea how I thought I was fat. I was doing intense exercise 5 days a week (more when we had performances) and will probably never be in that good of shape again. feels kinda bad

No. 806695

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I was diagnosed with BDD in my early twenties, although my symptoms started in childhood I never got to meet with a counselor until I was independent. I could spend hours in front of a mirror analyzing my face and breaking down etc. Or taking selfies just so I could Photoshop my face and plan my future plastic surgeries. I dropped out of university because going out and being seen and having to speak and draw attention to myself gave me panic attacks. Some days I would drive to work only to call in sick because I mirror checked before going in. I was also obsessed with the idea of being disfigured in an accident or brutal attack, I would imagine this shit happening to me basically all day long and wishing it would happen so when people looked at me they'd see that something terrible had happened to me instead of seeing me as an alien's terrible attempt at human taxidermy. I even seriously considered attempting diy cosmetic surgery. It was really obnoxious and I feel bad for all people that had to interact with me in peak BDD mode. Counseling helped me develop coping skills and I learned how to pull myself out of an episode and even stop them before they started. I was able to accept being ugly and was satisfied with that. I assumed I'd be dealing with my disorder for the rest of my life but at least it was manageable and I could function like a normal person. Then one day the curse was just lifted? The bitch in the mirror is a total babe. It was a really surreal awakening experience, like when I saw myself in my dreams I was beautiful and I thought I was a retard for imagining myself that way, and then suddenly I could see that beautiful me in real life, and I see her every day now. A few years ago I could name 10 cosmetic surgeries I had planned, thank god I never went through with them because now I am in love with myself and I definitely would have regretted botching my adorable face. Oh yeah and I was able to go back to school and finished my degree at the top of my class, I was finally able to prove my potential after my brain stopped the crazy self gore loop. Feels good man. Hang in there BDD-chans, you'll be free someday too.

No. 806696

Is our constant involvement with the internet, and idk mirrors ig, worsening dysmorphia? I want to understand.

No. 806701

I was raised morbidly obese so I hated my body and knew I was different/inferior to the other girls at 5. Took until college to reach the normal/overweight range, I could stand to lose 20-30 more lbs. As a teen I felt so othered to girls my age, was on /r9k/ and called myself forever alone, crossdressed for a while and cut my hair into a bowlcut and tried to cope but it made everybody give me more shit for being different because I looked retarded. I'm old so this was before the gender tranny panic shit, I didn't think I was a boy I just didn't think I was good enough to be feminine and had a very black and white view of things. One tropical vacation with my family I refused to change out of jeans the entire time while they enjoyed the lazy river because I hated my body so much. Nowadays I don't shave my legs and wear shorts and give less fucks but I still have other insecurities, like the line I've developed between my eyebrows from the worrying I do and my horrible profile, but I find what other anons say is true: the less I look in the mirror and focus on that shit the less it concerns me. I was actually listening to that a podcast for a while and dropped it because I was sick of how much the hosts talked about botox and shit it was making me want to do it. I don't consider myself a stupid or easily influenced woman but it gets in your head namsayin. And don't reply to me and tell me to get botox either

No. 806705

I think that I'm just objectively very ugly so it wouldn't be body dysmorphia. It started in middle school and got a lot worse in highschool. I would have crying fits and would stare at the mirror picking my skin and brushing my hair to make everything perfect only to feel like shit because my face wouldn't change. I was extra careful with how I slept so that my hair wouldn't get fucked and make everything even worse. I refused to wear tshirts during summer and pe because my arm and armpit hair are longer than normal, I wasn't allowed to shave and my classmates would call me monkey, and I would hide in the bathroom while changing because I wasn't comfortable with being seen by other girls (still am). For me it was the comparison with the other normal girls that killed me, I literally felt less of a human. In the end I'm still really ugly, but I'm kind of a neet now so it's not as bad if there's no contact with other people. I tend to really like/appreciate/make beautiful things, so I will probably never get over not being beautiful myself. It doesn't help that people treat you like a retarded animal if you happen to be a short, hairy, lanky gremlin with nasolabial folds and pufferfish eyes, but so is life.

No. 806707

>>806696
I would say it's not access to the mirror that causes BDD but access to a mirror can encourage compulsive behaviors for people with BDD. Selfie cams can do the same and they suck even more because they really distort your face. I think selfie culture and access to smart filters plays a big part in encouraging people with BDD to get plastic surgery to try and match their facetuned selfies. Restricting my access to social media helped me improve my symptoms.

No. 806725

I really pity teens these days growing up with camera apps like snow or IG filters etc which completely distortions your face, it completely erases human features like pores or expression lines and makes them believe this is how you're supposed to look.
Selfie culture was a mistake.

No. 806801

I don't experience body dysmorphia because I don't take selfies regularly, have never used a filter except when my camera turned a beauty filter on by default (which I turn off), don't retouch or edit my photos and don't look at social media. I'm convinced that most people could avoid getting BD just from using significantly less social media.

No. 806877

>>806701
I feel you so much anon i also was raised by deathfats and was bullied since elementary school for being ugly/fat. I'm early twenties now and "skinny"(normal BMI) but i still feel inferior to all other women, for example if i fight with my male friends I inmediatly think "maybe he would care more about me if I looked better", and if strangers or professors are rude to me I think it's because i'm ugly

No. 806883

Sometimes ppl confuse themselves being ugly with not being white.

No. 806899

i was diagnosed with BDD almost 8 years ago and funny enough i didn't use social media much at all prior to a few years back. it was getting better before quarantine but being stuck inside 24/7 along with how much more time is spent online, i've kinda "relapsed" and avoid going outside or letting people see me. i don't take photos and i avoid mirrors most days. i see my facial features change a lot and it's stressful.

i'm not surprised BDD/body dysmorphia in general is common amongst farmers tbh.

No. 806912

No experience with it, always liked my body. I don’t expect myself to look like a VS model and or viral e-girl so that’s probably why. Also am skinny and decent looking so that helps. I thought I was ugly as a kid since no one looked like me in my neighbourhood/school/on TV but I didn’t mind being ugly as long as I could go outside to play or watch anime. Can’t imagine what it’s like for girls born in the 2000s.

No. 806922

>>806912
Good for you but why even post then?

No. 806927

>>806922
Thought it would be helpful to share the experience of someone who’s never had it to see if it raises any flags for someone who does, or could be helpful. Sorry if I shit up the thread

No. 806955

Whatever you do don't download faceapp and out filters on you to make your skin look better/your hair thicker/make you look younger etc. Made that mistake and now my dysphoria is even worse

No. 806962

>>806955
>tfw i'm so ugly not even those apps can fix me

No. 806964

>>806962
I've felt this way.
I feel like I don't even know what plastic surgery would fix my face or what makeup suits me, like I need someone to just be straight with me and tell me what to fix. I know I'm ugly in that I hate my features but when I try to pinpoint what's wrong I can't even really "see" it correctly, only that I know it's ugly. For example depending on the day my nose is too big or too flat, my lips are too small or too big, my skin is sallow/sick-looking or artificially orange. I'm just trying to get over it and live my life.

No. 806990

>>806964
Not being able to perceive your own face sucks ass and is also a big red flag that you should not get plastic surgery. It is a slippery slope for people with BDD, first you get the high of changing your appearance thinking you fixed something but then it fades away when BDD brain kicks in and you still see yourself as an ugly amorphous blob, only now you have less money and your face hurts.

No. 807018

I know this is not the "right" answer, but fuck it. If you really, truly hate something about yourself and you know that it is honestly just about that physical thing and not just something you'll change just to end up hating something else…fix it. I had always hated my tits. They were somehow small yet deflated, had this weird banana shape, and were like 90% areola I shit you not. I saved up, got a boob job, and I don't want to die every time someone suggests going to the pool. It's fucking amazing. It was one little thing about myself but fixing it fixed how I felt about ME.

>>806883
This is so true. I always had people ask me when I'd get my nose done, even as a teenager. After I got my tits done, it was all "So you're getting your nose done next, right?" Truth is, I never fucking hated my nose. Everyone else hated my nose, but I had no problem with it. It messed with me for such a long time before I just had this stage where I realized that my nose is not ugly, it's just not a white nose, and a white nose is what people have been taught to consider beautiful.

No. 807025

my mother has always been exceedingly skinny, since i was a child. in her mid 50s now she's complaining that she's now 140 lbs at 5'9", "fatter" than she's ever been. that combined with her narc personality and abuse led me to have exceedingly poor self image. I went through a fatty phase in middle and high school and was bullied for a brief time by other girls. I had huge tits during puberty, but those fell off once I went through my high school anachan phase.

I was an overexerciser and undereater with anachan tendencies who managed to stay under my goal weight, but I wasn't even happy with that. in my late teens I developed a severe case of pneumonia that damaged my immunity. After that, I began to eat normally again, gained an inch in lost height that'd been stunted by my ed. Nowadays I eat like a dumpster fire as compensation for years of depriving my body of nutrients. I haven't gained a ton of weight, maybe 20-30 lbs on top of my lowest weight, but it feels that way. The body dysmorphia tends to fluctuate. I've gotten better in hating my body less, but still a very long way to go. Am an awkward pear shape, with normal to slightly short legs, big thighs. esp in a family of tall women with apple bodies, long legs, and decent sized tits, it's a curse, you feel like a stubby dwarf. Part of me really yearns to be scrawny again, the other part of me loves to eat too much and doesn't want to give it up. Thankless as I may sound I am happy about one thing: I have a big fat ass, which is a curse as it as a blessing.

As for my face, it's definitely gotten worse. Can remember the days before crazy plastic surgery trends and everyone and their mother photoshopping themselves into a blowup doll. I was more secure back then. Dare I say I thought I was so much prettier in high school back when I was skelly, and my face was thinner. Having somewhere between a oval and heart shape face, you always feel like your features are quashed. It's a revolving door of abuse, and I flip flop. lips are too small, eyes are too big, philtrum is too long, cheeks are too chubby, face is too oily, etc. I've found comfort in looking at people who resemble me but then I see some of them get bashed or called ugly, and I resort right back to insulting myself. I'm considered plain janey on an objective level and I should be thankful for that, but instead it makes me bemoan how much I could change my boring face if I just shelled out thousands to botch myself before I'm 30. Then I realize how annoying that would be. I want to be in the entertainment industry doing behind the scenes stuff and I'm afraid even as a crew or PR person they'll try and bully me into getting surgery.

No. 807032

>>806955
ironically downloading FaceApp made me hate myself less? I would randomly combine myself, faceswap, and make hypothetical kids, and I felt a bit better about how my features worked together with other peoples. Now sometimes these would turn out bad, but way less than I expected

No. 807043

sometimes it’s fun to just go out and be defiantly ugly. turning 30 helps too.

No. 807102

>>807043
turning 30 doesn't help. Still hate myself.


Thinking about boob job for a long time now as for many, many other beauty surgeries. But I know it would not change the fact, that I am ugly. I would only lie to others, a reason why I don't use make up.

>>806695
Don't really trust counselor. There are too many money hungry ones. How did you know it was a good one?

No. 807111

Oh boy. I've hated my face since I was young, long before I ever joined social media. Absolutely hated looking at pictures of myself growing up. Of course, hating them meant my mother would point out all the little flaws and ways I looked stupid just to annoy me, which made it worse, so she kept doing it, and so on. It's resulted in me obsessively nitpicking every photo to find a flaw before someone else can and immediate humiliation/anger when someone takes a 'silly' photo of me. I've mostly made peace with how I look in the mirror, but the moment someone gets a picture all those insecurities rush forward. There's not a facet of my face that I don't criticize.

I think the biggest insecurity is my mouth, though. People will say I have a nice smile and I immediately clam up because it sounds so wrong to hear. Like, no! Don't you see the way my upper lip just disappears in an open-mouth smile? Or how weird my lips look in a closed-mouth smile? How deep my smile lines are? Being able to hide most of my face with a mask is a blessing these days.

No. 807113

>>807043
Based. This is also how I cope, don't play the game, fuck the game

No. 807152

For me it started when I was 10. I was wearing a long underwear shirt, which are tight and long sleeved, and my grandma said something regarding the fact that I needed to lose weight because I looked fat. I was 10…and I wasn't even a fat kid, I just had a tummy, I was still growing..
Then, when I was..11? 12? My friends dad called my nose a "Roman nose" and kinda laughed about it, to my face. When I got upset he tried to play it off. My dad was there at the time and told him to stfu but the damage was done kek. My nose has a bump on the bridge of it, I posted a pic in the plastic surgery thread before. I absolutely detest my nose to this day. Then in grade 7, also when I was 12, I had a "friend" who made a point to make fun of my nose. She would ask me if it was broken, or if I had broken it before, she would say it was crooked and that it had a bump on it, as if I somehow was unaware of this fact. She also told me I had a mustache kek, I WAS 12 and was (still am) extremely pale and so the 7 hairs above my lip qualified her to tell me I had a fucking mustache.
Yeah I'm a mess and still struggling with my hatred for my nose and body kek. Luckily I recovered from my ED but the thoughts never really go away nor the unhealthy habits, you just learn to manage them in a way that's not detrimental to your physical health. To me, the worst part of having an ED is the effect it has on your mentality regarding food and appearances, and it's pretty much intertwined with my BDD

No. 807187

>>807018
When I went to the Hospital for orthopedic surgery the fucking surgeon asked me if I was going to get my nose "fixed" in the future. I ended up not going through with the surgery but I carried that around with me for a long time.
Luckily I told my mom years later and she was appaled that someone could think something like this. She called it the our family name hump. Which may seem like a small thing, but it makes me feel connected to my family and it helped me lay that thought to rest.

No. 807272

File: 1621091160871.jpg (196.16 KB, 1080x1332, b0867ad3704a2ccd327b6493797ad2…)

Oh man, I don't know where to start. I haven't been diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder, but body dysmorphic symptoms have always been a major background vibration all my life, starting from like age 7 when I was constantly anxious about my protruding belly and ungrown boobs. And don't even get me started about how much I despised my beautiful nose and wanted it cut down to size. I remember grown-ups raving about how dolls like barbies and bratz make kids mentally ill, but boy did they straight up ignore the rest of y2k porn-chic pornsick bullshit that oozed out of every piece of media. It didn't help that girls my age were so stupidly anal about fitting these ridiculous standards, because the place where we lived childhood just wasn't a thing separate from teen angst and 'adult' stuff.

I have way less anxiety about my weight or my waistline these days, but for sure I still struggle with my skin and face. I've had laugh lines since 14, I think. At least, that's when I discovered them. My face has always looked kinda 'old' or mature compared to my peers. My face is also pretty expressive; it's not like a 'quiet face' if that makes sense. I actually look better when I'm smiling or doing something highly energetic with my face, instead of just staring blankly or giving a shut-up toothless smile.

But because I'm so conscious about my wrinkles, it's hard to allow myself to be the dynamic, expressive, high-energy person I really am. I still find myself obsessing over how 'old' my face will start looking if any of the lines deepen, which is some major unfair bs considering these lines were there since 10 years ago already. Despite aging 'well' in terms of not changing much even after being hit with disordered eating, insomnia and moderate alcohol abuse, it's like I never even had a chance as this Bernadette Button to begin with.

My body dysmorphic fixations seem to have a resentful undercurrent, as I pin my fears and frustrations on my surroundings - I feel wronged by other people and society for only being valued for something elusive I wasn't even supposed to be born with. This is something I've identified and am trying to resolve within myself. Here's the thing though, all of you listen up: it's a REAL FACT that our culture is messed up and perpetuates toxic ideas. But as someone going through dysmorphia, you have to remind yourself that people in general feel the same pressure, want to reject it and don't judge you wholly as a person for your perceived imperfections. Most people probably won't even notice it and even if they did, they wouldn't care because it'd be just a feature to them. You might be rare for having such intense feelings or reservations, but even then you're really not alone. We're all groomed to be dysmorphic because that's profitable, and you just happen to be less resistant to this social toxin. Your anger is valid, but don't let it consume your whole reality.

My way of keeping my perception in check is to opt for neutral language and descriptions when paying attention to my physical self. I've also come to question the coherence and validity of what our mainstream culture considers 'youthful' and thus valuable, since I've looked like I do ever since youth (unpolished, blunt and powerful perhaps), and I'm not unique in this regard. If you find yourself too exhausted to constantly grapple with semantic reality, that's what role models are for. Hone on your ability to admire women who are alike you, are further along than you, who you can sympathize with etc. You'll find yourself eventually becoming much less resentful of people who supposedly have a 'better' appearance than you do. Hell, you'll start to forgive the people who didn't even comprehend the evil they were putting on you before, through copypasted expectations they never had to even think about twice.

No. 807304

i hate how i look so bad . im fat by my mom's standards and i have a lot of skin issues on my legs and get called a dalmatian by her then get slut shamed by my dad if i wanted to wear shorts or a knee length skirt. i cant wear cute shit because of them and ive developed bulimia somewhere in my early teens due to my mom's bullying

>How to cope?

at most times i just draw my ideal self and delete it

No. 807508

File: 1621112765798.png (195.9 KB, 703x560, ugly.png)

I'm feeling a lot of shame over my BDD, like I'd feel whiny if I dare to say anything too negative about myself as it is but I want to open up to a couple of close friends about it just to lighten the load a bit since I got the diagnosis just recently but… I don't know what to expect?

Do you look for support in your friends anons?
How do you do it without making it sound like you are fishing for compliments?

No. 807515

This popped up in my YT recommendations, probably because daddy google caught me clicking into this topic yesterday, and found it kinda interesting. Just something really brief about what's scientifically going on in the brain of a person with BDD

No. 808602

kinda got over my body dysmorphia. i'm going to get ugly as shit anyways so it's more worth it to brainmaxx and hit the books.

No. 811959

File: 1621570306370.jpeg (64 KB, 822x415, 7430D210-E24E-43B2-BF06-6F5BDB…)

I don’t know if this is body dysmorphia or if I’m just delulu.
When I look at myself in the mirror I’m perfect, sure, my nose is a bit “droopy” but when I’m in front of the mirror everything is harmonious. Since I take care of myself, my skin looks beautiful in the mirror, it looks bright and speckles. I do have a bit of dark circles around my eyes, I think I look nice with them as well I can spend minutes just staring at myself and practicing expressions and such.
Then I take a picture of myself, I look pretty nice, I try to take pictures with a natural light rather than with artificial light, I use filters that won’t change my face too much because I really, really like how I look in the mirror and sometimes I really look pretty.
But then, someone takes a picture of me, they always say the same thing:
>you look so pretty here!
And I look like a monster, I always look huge, I know I’m fat, I can see that in the mirror but in the mirror i always look pretty, regardless of my weight. My head looks really small, my face, even with makeup on, looks like it doesn’t belong to me, I look like a witch’s caricature, my skin looks too shiny and greasy, my recessive chin looks ridiculous and my arms look humongous when in the mirror they look harmonious with the rest of my body.
I workout as much as I can, I avoid taking many pictures with others and I try to take care of myself as much as I can. I hope I can someday look at the mirror and look at a picture taken by someone else without finding any differences.

No. 812235

File: 1621604739264.jpg (3.64 KB, 155x275, 1614016368349.jpg)

>>807304
Last month i cut off all my hair and now i look like a dumb fat sjw, I can't leave the house without a wig and 4 layers of clothes, because im afraid of how my reflection looks. It's gotten to the point where im scared to shower because what if i see my body.
The lack of hair exposes all my bad features. Especially how fat my face is.
I 've had long hair all my life and I feel like someone stole my body and im now inhabiting some disgusting troll. Not to mention my skin is breaking out badly from the biotin im taking. I actually kept the bag of hair i cut off and have tried to tape it back onto my head(like a fucking lunatic).It all feels like a nightmare. I quit my job and im going to hide in my room until it all grows back.Not to mention I've been having dreams of all my hair growing back and whenever I wake up i want kms. feels like im in hell. FUCK every single idiot who says "just cut all your hair off" its not freeing i feel like a fucking abomination.

No. 812239

>>812235
replied on accident mb

No. 812275

>>811959
You’re probably delusional about how attractive you are. Pictures taken from a distance are much more accurate than selfies, or standing really close to a mirror because there are no angles or lens distortion. You might be titling or angling your head when you take selfies or look in the mirror. Also you probably can’t tell how fat you are from a selfie or looking at your face in the mirror.

No. 812286

>>812275
>No lol you're just ugly
The body dysmorphia thread isn't exactly the best place for this type of replies nonna

No. 812302

>>812286
It’s honestly good to know, tbh, maybe my mind is just trying to protect me from my own ugliness, I just have to work harder.

No. 812322

File: 1621614727768.jpg (3.4 MB, 4000x3000, PicsArt_05-21-11.29.23.jpg)

>>812275
nayrt but damn, your harsh response actually makes my dysmorphic ass feel a bit better. I'm the opposite – I think I look disgustingly fat when I look in reflective surfaces or look down at my body, but when I see myself on webcam for work or in photos I'm always startled by how bony I look. Trying to be realistic about my body shape is hard because I know I'm not truly skinny but I have to accept I'm not fat either.

I'm diagnosed, but I still have thoughts like, "It's not really BDD, my brain is just trying to cope with/reject the fact that I'm ugly and fat."
The weirdest thing I do to calm down is write little comics where the characters are representations of my ideal self and how I see myself (both drawn very exaggerated) and make them talk to each other. It's been helping me take this less seriously and also reconcile the 2 clashing unrealistic images of myself that are constantly terrorizing my thoughts. I'm phoneposting so this is probably spaced out like shit but I hope it helps someone.

No. 812325

If I look normal in candids, selfies, and videos but horrible in every posed photo what does that mean

No. 812327

>>812325
No idea, but same

No. 812329

Honestly videos is the most accurate way to see yourself

No. 812342

My problem started in middle school when my sister started commenting on my appearance, she’s always been into makeup and styling but I was one of those frumpy tomboys. She’ll always be curt and say stuff like
>“you look gross”
>“why do you put your hair up like that”
>”when people see your acne they think you’re unhygienic”

She still does it now but I’ve come to accept that I’m forgettably average looking. I rarely ever draw anyone’s attention with my appearance and I like that I can go places without being followed or hit on.

No. 812347

>>812342
Same but with my brothers and cousins, both male.
They always tell me that I look ugly and that I’m fat and such, and I honestly just feel frustrated after all, because even if I workout, eat less and drink more water, they always say that I look horrible, frumpy, gross or just fat, sometimes they also tell me stuff like
>big deal, you will start your diet and give up like always
>lol look at you trying to workout
And I end up giving up everything, their comments about my appearance are always negative, so I will just forget about it at some point, I really need to disregard them because they just want me to look like the women they want to fuck, and that’s not what I want, I just want to be healthy and to wear whatever I want.

No. 812367

Yesterday I was testing zoom on a new laptop by starting a video call with my old laptop which was next to me. So as soon as I accept the call I'm greeted with my face from a sideways angle I normally never see myself at, and my god I knew my nose was big but I had no idea it was THAT ugly and huge.
It seriously kind of shocked me, to think I've been walking around with a nose like that all this time without realizing it. Nobody ever told me my face was this tragic so I just lived my life thinking I only looked slightly unfortunate at most.
Ignorance truly is bliss anonitas.

>>812329
This sounds about right. The camera's depth of field and lack of a 3D image will still affect the accuracy, but it seems like the best way. I look worse in a video than in the mirror, especially if I'm talking, but I look much better in motion than in (most) pictures.

No. 812415

>>812322
You’re wonderful at drawing, glad to hear you found a healthy outlet

No. 812430

File: 1621624967271.jpg (30.01 KB, 710x407, images.jpeg-7.jpg)

I have a problem where I don't know if it's just an issue of where I lived and to an overall audience im actually attractive or if american men are just playing with me, im the furthest thing away from my country's beauty standards, I was the accessory ugly friend to a Narc Stacy for years, I was fuck and dump material because of my body and that was it.
And then I went to study abroad in the States and it's like a switch flipped, suddenly I'm an 9/10 goddess and men go out of their way to do shit for me, Im absolutely terrified this is just a ruse because im foreign and seen as "easy".

No. 812437

>>812430
>im the furthest thing away from my country's beauty standards
This line puzzles me. What do you mean? How do you deviate from your country's beauty standards and how are these standards different than American ones?

No. 812439

>>812430
There are actually relatively few measures of objective beauty. Everyone recognizes that symmetry, youth and generally balanced proportions are attractive, but how that coalesces into "ideal" features and faces is more subject to cultural standards. Hence why the situation you described exists. Someone considered average or perhaps even below average in their own country can go abroad and see a massive uptick in the attention they receive because their traits are more "exotic" or interesting or something that culture is trying to emulate. As long as you're not suffering from some sort of outright deformation, you're probably perfectly attractive. Doesn't change the fact that men everywhere primarily want to get into women's pants rather than a relationship, though.

No. 812440

>>812430
Well are they "pumping and dumping" you like your countrymen or are they looking to be long term with you? Also what are your country's beauty standards?

No. 812441

>>812430
Most Americans are fat and dumpy so it’s easy to stand out as attractive there

No. 812445

>>812430
This might be a social class thing.
Might be less to do with your body and more to do with the way you carry yourself and the way you dress and the way you behave yourself.
I know when I went abroad it was easy for me to fake being middle class, which improved my dating prospects quite a bit.

No. 812451

File: 1621627478821.jpg (31.23 KB, 400x400, images.jpeg-18.jpg)

>>812437
For reference im Brazilian and specially where I live on the southwest the beauty standard is pretty much looking as european as possible (blonde hair, light eyes), thick-fit and with a beach tan.
I am extremely racially ambiguous, with dark hair and eyes and the stereotypical latina look but deathly pale skin (got called "corpse girl" back when i was bullied in school) i also used to be underweight until the pandemic.
>>812439
>>812440
Insofar I haven't had to deal with being fucked and dumped at all though honestly I take a pretty long time to "put out" so that might ward off fuckboys, all my relationships abroad have been long term and ended over normal relationship shit im also currently engaged to my american bf.
>>812445
I've actually been pretty well off most of my life, went to a private school and all that, though honestly im pretty sure my body language screams SPERG.
>>812441
I also didn't study somewhere like LA or NYC so that also may make a difference.

picrel some brazilian influencer.

No. 812472

>>812451
Aah yeah. As an American I've heard a lot of shitty American guys fetishize Brazilian women and latinas in general as sexy, "fiery"/passionate but also traditionally feminine. Like they'll be dynamos in bed and provide fun banter but then they'll also pop out 5 children and cook all your meals. Those stereotypes often come with latina features even when you're lighter skinned and can definitely play a role in guys wanting to hook up. Assuming your fiance treats you much better and sees you as a person rather than some gross checklist.

No. 812710

i always had kind of low self esteem but the things i used to hate about myself were mostly things that could be fixed easily, like dying my hair, letting my hair grow, buying certain clothes etc. what truly fucked me up was when instagram fame became a thing, big lips and big butts became desirable. for the first time i was looking at myself and finding flaws that could be fixed with surgery. it's stupid because in a way i was lucky, i never had to feel ugly before because of my features, because of my nose or lips or anything. but now the extreme was popular, the perfect was in, so ofc my lips were suddenly too small, my butt was too small, my face too asymmetrical. i was always fantasising about surgeries, wondering how i could perfect myself. i never got anything done though. instead i got more into pages that would expose what those perfect instagram models really look like. i would watch people on instagram go way overboared, probably because their own view of themselves had gotten so distorted that even though they were absolutely filled up with fillers, they would always be able to find a mistake. i could probably have taken this road if i had the money and if i had not snapped out of this obsession with being perfect. suddenly i was listening to friends say they wanted fillers and this and that and i would just get sad because whatever they thought was wrong with themselves, would mostly just be visible to themselves and no one else. it was sad because i used to be the same. i think if you fixate too much on yourself, you can always find mistake. no one is perfect. no one has no skin texture or lines, no one has a perfectly symmetrical face, and it's not possible to achieve without ending up looking uncanny valley, without getting even harsher on yourself and seeing even more mistake. i still have moments where i'll find a flaw and feel bad, but i'm happy that i'm also able to see that trying to fix the flaws won't solve anything for me

No. 812712

>>812710
samefag, but i just want to add that i do think that some people will feel happy getting one thing done that they really wanted and that they won't end up wanting more and more. but i think you have to be really self aware and know that you aren't just exaggerating a flaw and that you don't have a tendency to notice new flaws everyday depending on trends etc

No. 812724

I've had pretty bad nasolabial folds since I was around 16 (no drugs, smoking, drinking, just shit out of luck genetics) but don't feel like setting fire to boatloads of money in a lifetime to get them pumped up. in the morning and night i can see fine lines where they are. I feel like I had my youth taken away from me way too early, but I cope by saying I'd rather travel and experience things than get filler.

No. 812746

>>812712
this. I got my under eye area filled and a small amount of filler in my lips, slowly build up over years. I look so much fresher and completely natural and I don't really want to change anything else. Maybe in the future when I'm 40+ I'll get some botox/thread lifting.

My body is a different thing, I would never get a boob job or something like that. I just don't care enough lol. tbh all I want is to be a skinny fit legend and objectively I'm quite close to my goal but I can't see it. I look huge in the mirror and I store most body fat in my legs, although I'm at a bmi of 19.5 and I work out 6 days a week. so annoying!! losing 6lbs would probably be enough but I have a baby and I need tons of food because I still breastfeed.

No. 812752

>>812746
I feel sorry for your baby

No. 812755

>>812752
wtf, why?

No. 813448

>>812752
i just hope its a male, girls don't deserve to be raised by anachan moms it fucks us up

No. 813685

I'm such a retard with my weight, I fluctuate in a <7 lb range (at 5'7) but when I'm at the high end I literally will not go outside, can't concentrate on anything, feel like I want to rip my skin off. But still I can't keep that weight off, even for my sanity, because food is my main comfort & I'm addicted to binging. Fuck sake, this has ruled my life for a decade & the solution is so simple but I can never stay at my comfortable weight. I take laxatives after binging because I'm paranoid that my boobs will be stretched out from the water weight& permanently saggier when I lose it (this happened slightly already when I gained & lost ~10 lbs)

I hate it here, even the high end of my 7 lb range is still underweight so it makes no sense for me to feel this awful & fat. The only time I see what I really look like is when I take benzos, it's like they shut off whatever subconscious BDD shit happens

No. 813700

>>812746
You sound insufferable.

No. 813707


No. 813725

>>813448
better than being raised for chubby mediocrity, if restricting calories while hitting your nutrient requirements can damage you then you're addicted to food

No. 813741

Don't know if this counts as body dysmorphia, but when I see pictures of myself I absolutely hate how I look. Just yesterday a friend sent me some pictures she took of our friend group hanging out and I made the mistake of looking at the photos. I feel like I always look enormous, that my face is so round and my features look weird and too small for my face. I also hate how my cheeks are so round and my cheekbones are so undefined so I just look like a fucking moon. When I see myself in the mirror I think I look fine, but whenever I make the mistake of looking at pictures I am just overcome with intense self-loathing. I also hate how I look when I smile or laugh, but I'm also so socially awkward that I smile or laugh all the time out of nervous habit- which I'm trying to stop.

I know it's the biggest cope of all, but I just try to focus on other things like my hobbies or whatever to make me interesting. At the end of the day even if I'm ugly so what. I have too many issues to think of dating anyway and my friends seem to like me enough even if I'm unattractive. I remember how much it hurt to be the "ugly" friend in high school/middle school, but male attention isn't that important to me anymore.

No. 813770

>>812451
Aren't most Brazilians brown tho?
I've even met a Brazilian who i think might be chinese or Japanese.

No. 813773

>>813741
I could have written this. In the mirror I look fine but in pics my head looks like someone used black magic to preemptively edit the pic to make fun of me

No. 813932

File: 1621807097304.jpg (7.44 KB, 201x250, images.jpg)

I've had 8 plastic surgeries. I spend huge amounts on botox and fillers, clothes, hair and makeup. I won't leave the house unless I feel that I look my absolute best. Last week my mascara looked clumpy but I had to go out, and I wanted to die all day.

Numerous surgeons have rejected me, but I keep going. Now I've finally found a surgeon who wants to do my 9th and 10th surgery. Half of me is stoked, I can't wait. The other sidee of me wishes he'd say no and that no surgeon would accept me ever again so I might be able to feel at peace. I'm embarrassed to share my extreme levels of vanity but I'm living in my own personal hell. So that's my experience with it. Life is torture, nonitas.

No. 813936

>>813932
get therapy, girl. At least read some radfem lit of something. Anything other than surgeries

No. 813941

>>813932
Gotta add: my 9th and 10th surgery are booked and I'm already considering one more. Honestly laughable. The ride never ends.

>>813936
I tried therapy for years, anon. I like to consider myself a radfem, although I suppose any true radfem would laugh at someone like me identifying as a radical feminist. I have my reasons for falling into this obsessive-compulsive trap.

No. 813944

>>813932
Nonna how can you afford so many surgeries?

No. 813983

>>813932
May I ask what you've had done surgery wise?

No. 814197

File: 1621828228003.png (741.72 KB, 593x651, Profile_-_Dopey.png)

>>806375
I mentioned this a bit in the confession thread I think but I feel like I have a weird version of bdd. I don't feel disgust at how I look, as in, I don't think I look ugly or anything. The extreme discomfort with my face (and body) comes from how I don't feel like I fit… it just feels like it should belong to someone I dislike. Kind of like how people can have a punchable face yet that doesn't mean theyre unattractive. I kind of look like an idiot or maybe a slightly mean person? I'm introverted yet have an incredibly "extroverted" body: wide hips and big thighs no matter what weight. I also have naturally arched eyebrows that make me look permanently kind of surprised or happy. I hate it.

No. 814207

>>813941
Therapy isn’t some magic cure, you still need to put in a lot of work to improve your mental state. The doctor just gives you directions but it’s up to you to keep yourself on track and take each and every step forward.

No. 814241

File: 1621835860014.png (642.43 KB, 640x982, https___bucketeer-e05bbc84-baa…)

I think I've had some form of (undiagnosed) bdd for years but thought I was just ugly. I know rationally I probably look pretty average but my brain always gave me some sort of fucked up perception of myself. My skin is super pasty pale, basically looks like a corpse. My eye sockets are deep and hollow and I have permanent eye bags. I'm a ginger and have curly hair and while people always complimented the color I never knew how to style it so I cut it all off.

I avoided looking at my face in mirrors until it was dark, even to brush my teeth. The anxiety I had about my looks made me not go outside for days in fear someone would see me. I don't have any pictures of myself saved anywhere because I can't stand to see myself. Still working on that last one but at least I can do the other two above. Ironically one day during a manic phase I starting putting on a ton of makeup highlighting all my worst features and made myself look like a clown though it kinda helped my self esteem?? Like if I cant be beautiful at least I can scare children on the street kek. Idk there's shit I could spend thousands of dollars and time obsessing over to change about myself but I don't have the time, money or energy to do so, so I just 'accepted' the way I am right now.

No. 814794

Stop using social media, throw away all mirrors except for a small one in your bathroom to check necessities. Then start developing a personality and hobbies bc if you had a personality or hobbies, you wouldn't have time and care so much about looking perfect. Body dysmorphia is a mental disorder which appeared with the acceptance of narcissism. Back then people were ridiculed for looking to often in the mirror. There are even tales like Narcissus to prevent people from becoming narcisistic. Nowadays social media is celebrating narcissism and people are aware of every small flaw. In the end it is your fault if you suffer from body dysmorphia in contrast to other mental illnesses where you have no control whatsoever. I have no sympathy for people who look too often in the mirror and cry about not having big uwu eyes or plump porn lips. Boohoo cry me a river.

No. 814836

>>814794
Anon, some of us are just ugly by various stardards and can't deal with being treated like shit because of it. With the way every type of media tells women how to look and behave, with men believing that porn actresses are the only true women, it's only natural that some of us develop this illness. It's not necessarily narcissism, it's trying to constantly make up for something that everything is subtly telling you that you lack.

No. 814861

>>814836
Even if you're literally a burn victim if you stop putting importance on looks you'll still be far happier than the hottest woman ever who worries about hers constantly. People love an excuse not to change though.

No. 814928

>>814794
how many times will you repost this?

No. 815080

File: 1621909196367.jpeg (128 KB, 856x606, 412BE232-A4CD-426B-B474-12D260…)

>>814861
Ok but it’s not easy, unless you want to be everyone’s, free of charge, life coach, I don’t see what’s keeping you so pressed about some of us feeling like shit about our looks.
I don’t think there’s going to be a huge majority of anons going like
>oh my god, this is all I need to do!!
Change doesn’t happen in the blink of an eye, and you spamming the same message for everyone to see, like an absolute tool isn’t of help.

No. 815264

I'm >>807152
this video made me cry lol. I know some anons dislike Dr Dray, but the things she mentions really hit home, and made me feel better about myself. I'd recommend everyone watch it if you suffer with BDD issues

No. 815275

File: 1621935981047.jpg (12.23 KB, 220x200, 1578092315438.jpg)

>>814794
you're giving this shitty crackhead outside a walmart type of advise on lolcow? Get over yourself nonnie.

And it seems you've forgotten that scrotes will literally harass women they don't find attractive. Let us have one place to vent about this shitty existence and go fuck yourself.

No. 815319

>>814861
Burn victims are out of standards though, everyone understands that they went through a horrible traumatic experience and that's it. Same with very deformed people (men will still complain that they're not hot though, and they won't have a love life with them). Also no, burn victims are not happy and would do anything to go back to who they were before, even if they say the contrary to be strong. So yeah, shitty example.

No. 815370

a few years ago i succeeded in losing 170lbs. i went from 310 to 140. so i’m covered in loose skin. it’s damn near everywhere, face, neck, arms, back, chest, stomach, ass, thighs, etc. after the weight loss i started lifting weights. bodybuilding is now one of my hobbies and main forms of exercise. i have been able to put on a decent amount of muscle thus far but it will never even come close to being enough to “fill out” my loose skin. i’ve been married 12 years and my husband has been supportive of my journey every step of the way. i have broke down many a time and cried to him and wondered how he could even stand to look at me. somehow i found a decent man and he constantly assures me that he is still very much in love with and attracted to me, and he has never acted like he doesn’t. some days the skin doesn’t bother me. other days i can’t bear to look at myself in the mirror. i’ve thought about skin removal surgery but it’s very expensive, the results never really look that great, and people suffer nerve damage from the procedure. so i’m kind of just stuck having to slooooowly accept that this is what my body looks like now. don’t let yourselves become morbidly obese anons, nothing good will come of it.

No. 815377

>>815370
How did you lose that weight and how long did it take you?

that's a really big achievement so well done! I hope in the future you can feel better regardless of what you choose to do. You deserve to be proud of your body!

No. 815388

>>815377
thank you very much! i am definitely more accepting of my body than i was a couple years ago, but i still have a long way to go. i found out i have hypothyroidism and pcos in 2016, was put on medication for both, and almost instantly began losing a bit of weight. those things we’re definitely not the only reason i became so heavy. i ate like shit constantly and was a severe alcoholic as well, the hypo and pcos just exacerbated the problem. but once my meds began to kick in it fueled me to begin working out and cleaning up my diet. you know that saying, “eat less and move more”? that’s basically what i did. it took a little over two years to lose all the weight. my health is a million times better and i’m no longer pre-diabetic. it wasn’t easy or fast, but it was one million percent worth it, loose skin and all.

No. 815469

>>815388
Thank you anon! this is some great inspiration/motivation.

No. 817603

File: 1622146692265.png (314.41 KB, 622x546, meme4.png)

I feel like I look cute in a weird, rat-faced way, and my laugh kinda fits that too. I think my face looks juvenile in a way, though that may be because I am quite young, but not in a way men would find attractive, idk how to place it but my face hasn't changed ever since I was 3

No. 817868

Just saw a tiktok of a girl using FaceApp to edit her selfies; she said she uses it on every picture she posts. It straightened and lightened her hair, put perfect instabaddie makeup on her, gave her a different eye shape, gave her a sharp jaw, made her nose smaller, made her teeth straighter, and made her skin perfect…and it all looked so fucking real. She showed how to edit videos of herself to be skinnier and prettier, too. It was so fucking scary, from the fact that she thought it was a cute thing to show off instead of a dystopian reality, to the hundreds of people saying they do it too in the comments..how many people do I compare myself to that don’t even exist? Knowing that with like, 3 minutes work from an app I could look exactly how I wanted, but only in a picture? I feel sick. I don’t feel real.

No. 817898

>>817868
Link?

I use FaceApp to mostly just act as a guide for how to better my appearance. It made me realize I don't apply my foundation correctly and that I needed to grow my eyebrows out. I looks so much better, it's insane. I still get tempted to use it for my photos that I post, which I've done a few times, but I'm trying to refrain because already I'm getting to the point where all their filters don't alter my appearance in a way I like anymore. It has made me think of getting a small lip lift, I wish my upper lip were thicker so I didn't have to line my lips.

No. 817910

I'm pretty sure I have BDD. I used to be ana. I feel odd because I get compliments all the time when I go out or guys will offer to pay for things, that kind of stuff, and it's sad how I have to thrive off that validation to feel alright. I know they can't be lying because there's too many, and it's ridiculous to lie about something like that (right?).

I love molly because when I see myself in the mirror then, I feel like I'm seeing myself for the first time. I see this gorgeous, cute, but sexy creature and it amazes me how every part of my body looks complete. It makes me cry thinking about it because I wish I could feel that way about myself all the time. It's just so pure. I'd recommend to anyone struggling, at least it may give you the first taste of loving yourself.

I feel so sick in how I normally obsess over my appearance and feel fat no matter what. I'm 24 and I'm just like how I was when I was little, how the fuck am I going to grow up. I'm so embarrassed, I will tell my boyfriend my stupid stories about people trying to get my number in the dumbest places and he tells me it's weird how I don't get it that that shit happens a lot to me because I am attractive, and it boggles my mind still. I don't believe I'm part of that camp. I feel average and pathetic at best, like I'm pretending and trying to be up there with actually attractive people, but I'm not, I never will, because that's not who I am.

No. 817920

>>817868
This makes me fee really bad for all the girls growing up now. We had photoshop back then, sure, but todays apps are crazy and way better at hiding edits.

No. 817962

>>817920
Yeah, with photoshop to make it look believeable you've needed some skill and spend some time; and it was impossible to use on videos, now you can have easy to use and pretty hard to spot filters even on videos. I struggle to accept how I look and I've promised myself to stay away from filters and editing apps, I don't want to see my changed face even as a joke out of curiosity, I know it will fuck me up. Can't imagine how awful must the girl who uses it on every single photo feel about herself, even if she wouldn't admit.

No. 817965

>>817868
It's crazy how we're all OK with this. About a decade or more ago there was outcry about photoshopping in magazines and now we've accepted it as "airbrushing" and normal and there's so many delusions about the camera adding so many pounds or distorting reality that overly editing is the right thing to do to reflect what you look like. But it's just everyone's fucking delusions. Even seeing the face swapping apps. How many crazy people do you reckon are taking strangers photos and creating completely new individuals to pose as. The Internet use to be seen as an unknown bogey man then with all the money corporations can be making we've all became desensitised to the reality. People are sharing way too much online these days, but there's also all this catfishing happening and everything is warped. People seem to have no idea what looks normal.

No. 818142

>>812451
Holy shit anon. My crush ghosted me and got catfished with this same woman's pics kek

No. 818698

I have BDD. My skin has always been my worst obsession. I actually fucked up the skin on my face with creams & acids because I was convinced there was something wrong with it. I have broken blood vessels and huge scars, fragile skin and a few premature wrinkles. I've looked back at old photos prior to all this and my skin was flawless, bar one tiny post-acne mark. I was just delusional.

The rest might heal, but I am fucked for good, as I managed to infect one cheek. The scars fell off, but left a large (2 inch) depression, my face is noticeably asymmetric. So noticeable people scan my face when talking to me.

I cry every day and hate going outside.

No. 818838

>>818698
Anon I did the same thing, I wrecked my skin barrier with products and got a ton of acne and then scarring. I gets better I promise. Hope you have a gentle hydrating skincare routine and get into micro needling or lasers soon.

No. 821026

I'm the opposite. I think I'm ok looking but everyone else thinks I'm hideous or slightly below average

No. 821092

>>821026
Yeah I think I'm ok looking too but pretty sure I'm ugly/average to everyone else.

I feel like it's because I mostly judge my appearance relative to how I've looked in the past? Eg: I had bad acne when I was younger but my skin is clear now so I'm proud of it. But objectively it's not great, I have scarring and pigmentation, I just don't mind because I know it could be so much worse. Also I think the bar is SO HIGH for female beauty. You could have perfectly cute features in every way but there's still endless women much, much better looking and they're the ones people truly find attractive. I was looking at Barbara Palvin's instagram the other day thinking 'how the fuck could I ever be delusional enough to think I'm decent looking when this exists??' lmao.

No. 821097

I'm shorter and I feel so conscious about my arms all the time, it almost feels as if they're bulging with fat even though I am a very healthy weight and even felt like this when I was quite underweight. Not sure what it is and it's not even like my arms are really fat measurement-wise. I think it's mental and recognizing that making peace with it alone has helped a lot, though I hope it eventually disappears.

No. 821115

>>821092
A lot of people say I look like grace Jones. I'm not ugly I just have very strong features and dark skin. To the average scrote id obviously be ugly

No. 821117

Moved to >>>/g/189175.



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