File: 1602737213390.jpg (113.46 KB, 1280x720, maxresdefault.jpg)
No. 656151
>>656146No?
I legit feel like this is the lowest point in my life. It's been 4 years since my dad died, I'm overweight, I have a poor diet because I'm broke, I have depression, and my mom has scholisis. I just wanted to read some other people's experiences and how they got out of it. I'm not losing hope.
Pic is A silent voice btw, not fetishy at all
No. 656247
>>656197I went trought the same thing anon, except it lasted almost six month. Also my water heater broke so I stopped showering for one whole winter…
I also isolated myself so much I started talking to myself and had a fully developped imaginary life with friends, a fictionnal love interest, etc.
It was three years ago, looking back on it I can't believe no one did anything, I talked to my parents about it and all they said is they were really afraid I'd kms but didn't know what to do.
No. 656271
it wasn't as bad as others but it was no way to live…
all throughout middle school i was always an outcast and didn't care about anything but i had friends. then in highschool i was pretty much alone but i kinda got used to everyone "hating" me, aside from very few select people.
then i started living alone for uni and…yeah, i was used to being alone and thought no liked me so i stayed alone and didn't make friends. my flat was so disgusting. i'd have 4 trash bags on the floor at once. didn't have it in me to cook anything. i had no dreams or hope except for one thing (which ended up "fixing" me). i was just going through the motions. got good grades because i literally did nothing outside of school work. i never worked out or even walked, i didn't get a lot of sunlight, walking for 30 minutes was an accomplishment for me.
my life only existed online, in fandoms. i obsessed over relationships and interactions of fictional characters or real people i stanned.
i wasn't suicidal or addicted to anything but it was just…so one-note, void of happiness, nothing to look forward to. i wasn't taking care of myself at all, because nothing mattered. i eventually had the opportunity to start over, in a way. now i'm finally living life, maybe for the first time tbh.
No. 656280
File: 1602756544865.png (1.54 MB, 1786x1030, 1380467508227.png)
My sadness mostly came from just multiple 4/10 years adding up into a melancholy youth and young adult hood. What is sad is that 14 years later i still think i did good with the people i was surrounded by.
There were definitely some dips though.
Grade 7 where i went from a popular grade 6 school captain to a unpopular grade 7 who hung out with a group and nobody wanted to be friends with me for a year. Rest of highschool was a 4/10 experience.
5 years ago when i was a neet though and was struggling to get my foot through the door to land a job for a couple of months only to get a job through mum pulling strings. I have never felt so worthless. I've proved myself as a good employee but i still don't know how to succeed if i was put into that situation again.
Otherwise i've had some dips in depression but for the most part i'm doing well now.
I've never had a super low low, just a decade of being surrounded by people i struggled to connect with and who didn't really want to be my friend. I was the sympathy 'friend'
No. 656388
>>656234Kek right? Funny that a thread made for farming asspats, none of the posts gets replies, they all just talk about themselves and leave.
>>656319Back to PULL with you.
No. 656436
>>656432>scrote fetishStooooop, it isn't
Do you think a scrote would actually come and read shit about our shitty whatever lives? they rather wack off to some hardcore bdsm incest shit than read self pitying posts on this god forsaken website
Holy shit not everything is a fetish
No. 656453
>>656404The projection. Gonna need some
trigger warnings for that.
No. 656514
>>656138i graduated highschool over a year ago and have been climbing out of that low point. i struggle with disordered eating, and much worse purging when i was 14-15. cutting/self harm too. was super attention seeking to men on kik or discord. i was abusing drugs on and off, but especially in my senior year. multiple benders of acid and molly. i also am coping with trauma from a year long
abusive relationship i escaped from at the beginning of senior year. believed everyone hated me so i hardly socialized. i definitely started to improve when i started college, but it's not a straight line recovery.
No. 656683
>>656677*casual sex
Fucking hate being on my phone
No. 656720
File: 1602796803980.jpg (77.08 KB, 640x413, 4662382.jpg)
i love the women here lmao. i don't think OP is a scrote with a fetish but the skepticism about that truly means you are all my people. there's no shame in having a shitty past and I think a lot of this thread has to do with how people have managed to climb out of it. scrotes that would jack off to such a concept should kill themselves <3
No. 656810
File: 1602805737687.jpg (319.75 KB, 1300x1200, gIy9GOZ.jpg)
when i was a teenager (like 13-14) and self harming all the time i flipped over every piece of furniture in the house when i was having an episode and never showered, room had wasps constantly and i never cleaned it, was being sexually abused by a smelly ugly guy
i was also extremely overmedicated on antipsychotics and asleep most of the day
can't even list the lowest moment because it's too disgusting
god it still haunts me i work on becoming more of a normie every day, though the benefit is that i'm overly cautious with everything i do now
No. 656870
File: 1602813681892.png (97.95 KB, 192x275, D6846513-64CA-44CD-8013-FBDA8C…)
i tried to jump off my apartment building the other day but my bf caught me and dragged me back over the ledge and screamed at me calling me a stupid bitch while i was retching on the floor from crying so hard. im not going into the whys because honestly it would take way too long but i feel like that best illustrates where im at. it stings worse because last year at this time i was overseas living my dream. i feel like i peaked and the moment i got home my life has been constantly sabotaged by everyone who was supposed to love me.
No. 656981
File: 1602835127022.jpg (137.84 KB, 820x853, IMG_20190811_000429.jpg)
Id say around this time last year was my lowest point in life. Nothing was going my way, a close friend betrayed and hurted me to the point of no return. My overal health was declining, and my mental health was pretty much shit…I can't even get out of bed without feeling a ton of weight dragging me down. This even put a toll and affect my studies too, so my grades were pretty much shit from all of the combination above. Everyday is toture from just waking up and having to go out and socialize, it just seems like nothing can really cure the sadness in my heart no matter what i do. I'd say im better now, things did get better over the time. I learnt to understand that people come and go, learn that everything needs time to heal and focus more on the people that loved you rather than hated you. It really hurts but it made me grow as a person. To all of the anon here that are currently having a hard time, things do get better and remember to have hope because it really carries u through out.
I love all of you, please take care!!!
No. 657468
The latter two years of college for me. I attended art school and the incredible pressure of thesis year and the unanswerable question of what I'd do after graduation (coming to terms with the fact that my artistic job prospects were nil) ramped up my mental illness 1000%. I had super-irrational fears and rituals going on, I was suicidal to the point that I didn't bother signing up for a dorm room my senior year. When I didn't go through with it, I scrambled to find a shitty sublet (another awful experience, and in the process of moving there I had a breakdown and threw out all my clothes/sheets), then after like 5 apartment searches fell through for me, I found one and proceeded to spend the whole of my senior year turning my bedroom into a gross hoarder hell. The other women in the apartment (understandably) resented me for being a gross freak and causing multiple bug infestations in the apartment thanks to the unbelievable amounts of trash and takeout containers in my room. Somehow through all this I finished my thesis project, but its presentation and my subsequent graduation were all total non-events that my family didn't bother to show up to, save for my dad, who seemed very fixated on having me move out of the apartment and in with him, which I was NOT going to do because I knew if I did I'd be a stay-at-home NEET for the rest of my life.
Through sheer luck I got my first job (in food service, lmao) and made enough to move apartments (THAT move was also a nightmare but a brief one). The space fucking sucked but just the act of leaving the previous place, and not worrying about school anymore, and making peace with the fact that I didn't have to slave away making portfolio pieces to then find a shitty, unstable creative gig, drastically improved my mental health. I had some serious mental and financial dips after that, but nothing came close to being as bad as when I was hunched over some uncomfortable improvised furniture drawing on a tiny tablet in that garbage-filled room.
No. 657771
This shit is gonna sound fake af, but I'm gonna tell it anyways.
>raised in the bad part of the city, couldn't finish high school because of money
>start working to get money to go to school, but abusive mom steals it
>abusive mom that beats me and kicks me out of the house on a literal sense
>had low self esteem and literally 0 family or friends to support me, mom was disowned for getting pregnant at young age, and every kid I know is on a similar situation as me
>start dating a guy that becomes pretty abusive and violent, we have an off/on relationship and he constantly cheats with other girls
>mom kicks me out of the house, and I was too scared to couch surfing again, since she found me the last time I did
>ask abusive boyfriend if he can let me stay at his home, tell him I would do anything he wants so I don't have to go back
>boyfriend agrees, but when I go to his home shit gets bad
>doesn't allow me to wear clothes, yells at me, makes me pee on a towel cause I'm not allowed to get out of the room, starts hitting me too
>my friends call him asking if he knows where I am, he lies and says he doesn't know shit
>too scared to ran away, or to call the police, assume they would probably says is my fault for dating that asshole in the first place, and returning with my mom isn't an option
>boyfriend gets mad because of random shit, and I'm forced to get out of the house via a window when he isn't in the room
>get to a friends house wearing clothes I got from his closet, arrived there at foot, have 0 cash nor cellphone
>get help from friend to find a job and get on my foot again, avoid abusive ex
>said ex starts stalking me and harassing me
>start having panic attacks, suicidal ideas, and blackouts
>friend takes me to seek help, turns out I have PTSD
Eventually I got out of that stuff, and while my life is not exactly perfect right now, and still have a lot of problems, but at least I'm not using a towel instead of a bathroom, living in some drunk guy room.
No. 657813
File: 1602936807485.png (131.14 KB, 728x415, JH65NB3g.png)
I spent 19-24 in an awkward LDR with a woman I never even met irl. She treated me like shit and used me as a therapist. I was completely done after one year but I stayed for another four because I was terrified that if I left she would hurt/kill herself, and I guess felt like I didn't deserve better anyway. I had a really sad childhood so being in that relationship brought up all my old trauma and I was an anxious self-loathing mess 24/7.
I'm also like 99% sure she was straight lol. She said she was bi but only ever really talked about men and didn't have much sexual interest in me. I feel absolutely retarded for not ending it sooner. Literally all I had to do was block her and it would have been over but I just froze and watched years of my life go down the drain. It's been a year since I ended it but I haven't tried dating yet because I have no idea where to start as a 25 year old khv with that level of relationship baggage in my past.
No. 657954
>>657771Jesus christ, anon. Congrats on getting of out of that shit, you should be proud. That's amazing.
Hope your ex rots in hell.
No. 658010
File: 1602960205125.gif (238.83 KB, 220x220, J3.gif)
Living through it right now.
I come from an almost poor family, parents were always neglectful, am mentally ill but coping, live in a tiny town with shit transport, too poor to buy a car or get education, parents rely on me a lot despite being the unwanted younger child.
Had an upper middle class fiance that I was in a relationship for 6 years, his family liked me and we were close, his friends liked me too, was looking for a job in his town, we were supposed to move in together. Felt like I had my life together and was so so so happy - got dumped, have a dead end job that pays minimum now, mental illness got worse, father got cancer and his condition could get worse any day, too poor to afford an education, car, move out/rent, no friends.
Yey.
I'm trying hard to get back on my feet but damn it's like all the odds in life are against me.
No. 658298
File: 1602993740396.jpeg (91.01 KB, 720x629, 6DAC4152-692B-404E-83E8-1D8335…)
Sadly my lowest point was my childhood.
>being severely abused
>being sexually abused by three different family members
>tell mother says I’m lying about the abuse
>mother then puts me into a day care which I get sexually abused again, then I let it slip that this type of thing happens to me already so they get my mom involved
>mom tries to kill me multiple times
Shit’s fucking wild
No. 658332
File: 1602997984296.jpg (45.17 KB, 540x405, tumblr_pt31asNyUi1s5bd7x_540.j…)
Damn, mine feels like nothing compared to some of these but a few years ago I was om the road to becoming a hikikomori. I had just graduated and didn't have a plan or money for college, had no job, no car, and lost contact with all my friends. I felt so shitty about myself I didn't leave my room, look in the mirror, eat or interact with anybody until it was nighttime. I'd mostly pass the day binging videos and pretending to sleep do no one would talk to me (even though I couldn't). It genuinely felt like I had no joy in anything I did. I constantly thought about suicide but was too pathetic to even attempt that or do anything really. I'm better off now, I went to school even if I didn't finish, have a job and a few people I talk to. I'm not where I want to be yet but it's better than where I was. Sorry for everyone still going through a tough time. I know its cliche to say 'things will get better' but sometimes it's so hard to see how bad/good times are without hindsight later. Hopefully we'll get through this.
No. 658932
File: 1603065589875.jpg (42.63 KB, 640x480, dalecrying.jpg)
>be me at 12
>have a psychotic tiger mom obssessed with sending you to the best highschool in the country, private tutoring until 12am every weekday for 3 years+extra school on the weekdays
>mom installs a security camera inside your room so she can monitor you
>moms yelling and berating you all the time, hair falling out from stress you have a giant bald spot before you got your first period, start doing weird self-harm stuff to kys like eating pesticide, hitting your head to the wall, inhaling water, punching your stomach
>no one at school likes you cause you're a fat bald dork with glasses and acne, your crush asks you if you could ask your best friend to go to prom with him
>couldnt get in the school your mom wanted, she goes apeshit, you're having a mental breakdown because you think your life is over
>attempt suicide by jumping off the 7th floor, get caught, take a bottle of your grandma's heart pills
>parents going through a divorce, mom visits you in the hospital and tells you to tell the authorities you did it over a boy so she doesnt lose your custody
>horribly depressed from 13-16, your only safe place is the internet because your mom and little brother hate you and your dad is not in your life anymore
>mom thinks you're spending too much time on the computer, sends you to a mountain house with your grandma who has alzheimers
>no internet, nothing to do besides watching the same 10 say yes to the dress episodes on tv for months
>go back to school, everyones talking about vine and snapchat, you dont know what those are cause you've been isolated for so long also you dont have a phone and you're not allowed to go out so your friends desert you
>meet weirdos online who teach you ways to cut yourself and purge, go to school high on your grandma's xanax everyday, failing every class
>get sexually assaulted by a close family member tell your mom first because she's a woman and she's your mom, she doesnt believe you so you tell your uncle who is the only person who believes you and threatens the abuser
>your uncle dies
my life got so much better after going to college but i'm back at home now because of the pandemic and im taking care of my bedridden grandma, i love her sm but its draining my soul and mental health, this house brings nothing but bad memories ik its dumb cause i was a child when these happened and im 22 now so i should be over it by now and people go through actual traumatic stuff everyday and this is nothing compared to that but i feel weird being in my old room again
No. 659028
>>658932your trauma is completely
valid anon and what you’re doing to help care for your grandmother is honorable.
No. 659148
File: 1603098402610.jpg (84.2 KB, 728x486, cat-love.jpg)
i love u beautiful anons <3
you'll make it, keep your chin up queens
No. 730924
File: 1612541211433.jpg (47.29 KB, 564x559, 38fee6eb67f229db4f41fa898fec10…)
Bullies in school really made my life miserable as a teen. It got almost to the point of me not wanting to live anymore. My parent's didn't even help me enough, my school principal didn't even let me switch schools or quit school because i had to finish this shitty school before i could do that.
I was stuck there and couldn't get any help whatsoever. I also planned to take my life on my birthday at midnight, because no one helped me, if no one helped me or tried to get me out of this hell, then why would they even care i died? i didn't go through with it thank god, but it still fucking haunts me and still fucking breaks me that i had to suffer through all of this and didn't even get any sort of help.
Im alright tho, and got my shit together. Im still looking into therapy and trying to safe up money incase i do have to buy medication if i get diagnosed with shit tons of mental illnesses, which i probably do since the constant bullying i had to go through really fucked up my mental.
Anyway, school fucking sucks and i dont see why it's fun and why people love it so much when it only has been miserable for me, maybe im just pessimistic.
No. 730957
Been through some shit as an adult (losing a parent, my marriage ending suddenly, being cheated on) but similar to
>>730924 it probably was teen bullying that was my worst point. Mainly because as an adult you gain some resilience with age but back then everything hit harder.
I was bullied through all of primary school without anything being done to help. I was delighted when I got to move on to secondary school (highschool) but within months of joining I just had a new group that saw me as a quiet person and so a target. I was put on SSRIs and according to the warning label they can make you feel worse at first especially if prescribed to that age group (12/13) I was in a weird state of mind on them and ended up overdosing on them and a mix of my moms various medications. I was in hospital for a couple weeks on drips and having my liver and kidneys tested.
When I eventually went back to school one of the bullies immediately walks up to me and taunts me about the overdose. How the fuck did she even know?? She had to have heard about it through school staff. We never got answers on that. I really tried to return to school but my anxiety levels were through the roof, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer and I just wanted to die but I didn't want to hurt my mom. At first I would just barely show up but I left the school eventually.
One day when I was already out of school entirely, the same taunter showed up at my house (again no fucking idea where she got my address from) She spray painted something on our front wall (garden wall, not the house itself) Me and my mom just watched from inside the house. My mom didn't even want to confront her. She never allowed me to see what was written that day but I can only imagine it was telling me to kill myself. Or maybe she knew about my moms cancer seeing as someone was feeding her info? No idea what the girls problem was but at 13 she had made quite the trip to my house just to get that dig in after I'd already left the school months earlier. Looking back I imagine her own home life had something fucked up in it? to be that driven to try and torment someone. The rest of my teens was spent housebound. My mom died. I still don't know what she sprayed or who at the school was telling her that personal info.
No. 731282
File: 1612572167515.jpg (31.44 KB, 598x598, kyWglqN.jpg)
Sending and receiving nudes from Projared.
No. 731598
>>731282Oh my god please share the story and also post in
>>715719 because this can't have been the only case…
No. 731647
File: 1612610141860.jpg (91.44 KB, 1470x1040, 1539127890718.jpg)
Not sure if it was my lowest point, but definitely when things started going to shit.
>dysfunctional and abusive family, use internet as escapism
>tfw no dad either
>meet a guy in my state on omegle using the minecraft tag (kek) when i was 11
>he said he was older than me but he loved me so we start dating anyway
>happy to finally be loved in my life and have something to look forward to
>we met up a couple times at a park, but he was paranoid so never came to anything but kissing
>mom finds out after i leave my phone out and she snoops on the messages between us
>she freaks out and yells at me. she tells me she's going to call the police on me and get me arrested. she breaks my phone and slaps me
>still makes me go to school that day
>when i get home she tells me she is taking away my phone and computer, she calls the police in front of me
>i thought my life was over and that i was gonna go to jail. i beg my mom for forgiveness and cry
>she still berates me
>nothing ever came from it(?) except apparently he lied about his age (was actually in his 40s). she took away my phone and computer for the summer
>she held this over my head for years afterward and actually mocked me for something i sent (i called him "daddy")
>tfw this experience still didnt stop me from dating older men in my pre-teen/teen years
>tfw this experience taught me to never call the police, even when i was raped at 13
>tfw fuck you mom
No. 731752
>>731647Would it of killed her to just talk to you about internet/scrote safety? Turning you into the criminal and knowing at 11/12 you don't have the capacity to know that's bullshit logic.. I hate it.
There was similar tones of "if you get abused it's your own fault" in my fam too. Of course nobody even warns you about red flags in advance either. Sorry anon.
No. 733594
> Mid of 2017, I was in college…
> Extremely burnt out, started failing everything
> Could not keep anymore, dropped (it was my last year)
> Plan to sudoku after 2018 celebrations
> Feeling so much pain, so much I can't even put into words
> Body starts crumbling down: hard episodes of diarrhea and vomits
> Exams points nothing, I redid 3x then gave up
> Get to the point of barely having strenght to walk
> get to 39 kgs
> Fell ill physically and mentally 24/7.
> I basically spent the whole year of 2018 vomiting, shitting, crying, and laying in bed trying to not feel so much pain, waiting for death
I truly thought I was gonna die, I don't even know how, but I did a full 180° on life.