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No. 482594

Previous thread: >>472904

Tell it all, anons!

No. 482635

I don't want to be the first post but fuck it.

Yesterday I procrastinated by wasting 4 hours online when I have an exam today. I've stayed up till 5am making my stupid cheat sheet (writing in the tiniest fucking handwriting to cram everything) because I'm a neurotic mess.

Was it necessary? Probably fucking not. Is my notesheet unusable because my handwriting is puny? Possibly. Will I feel like shit when I wake up? Absolutely.

I was working in an empty lecture hall all night because why not, might as well deal with the consequences of my stupidity in style. The janitor came in at 4:30a.m. and gruffly told me to leave, but since I had so much shit out it took me a couple minutes and he said "do you need 15 minutes or what?" I feel like a piece of shit. Why can't I just not do these things in the first place?

Staying up so late I do get kind of loopy/act like a fucking idiot and then later just want to fucking cry and think about how I don't want to live any more because I'm just a dumbass who can't manage her time.

Now this'll probably fuck up my sleep schedule more and I'll be even more tired later this week and so make more terrible decisions and bitch about it more in this thread.

No. 482660

The janitor is an asshole, don't worry about him.
As for the rest, I understand your frustration anon. What's done is done and beating yourself over it won't help. For now you can focus on resetting your sleep schedule. Take care!

No. 482680

I guess this is is a vent/advice/ question post at once:
To all the younger radfem or radfem-leaning anons: how do you deal with close people around you being the personification of libfem twitter?
I feel quite alienated from my friends because they they dismiss my stance transgenderism and think I'm so terrible for that, even though I genuinely care about feminism and women's rights in general.
I'm interested in taking gender studies lessons but am genuinely afraid they'll hijack that too and make it about ~poor transwomen~ . Even my professor, whom I considered an, otherwise, very rational person has shown to be of their "kind" , and I'm starting to lose hope because it seems like I'm the crazy, evil one among them, and I can't find a single person who seems to beat least gender critical…
(It's probably important to mention that I'm from a third world country)

No. 482683

It's especially hard at uni and I feel the same way. All the professors that like me are in the transcult and my uni friends would think I'm evil if I ever let them know. My gender studies class definitely frequently got hijacked and it was honestly painful to be the only one in a room who disagreed. I would have anxiety attacks over going to class.
I feel a lot better though when I go to work and hear people openly disagree. Most people outside the academic setting don't buy the trans shit. I'm just scared bc it might fully seep into normie culture too.

No. 482686

Getting annoyed by boomers who work in customer service and don't know what they're doing, can't hear shit, walk and do things slow, don't know how to use technology, babble, act entitled and cause conflict with the younger people.

Why can't they just hire the young people who are practically begging to do work and can do it better than a 60 yr old who needs to belch out "pardon" every five seconds and acts like a coked out monkey when in front of a computer screen

No. 482690

Apparently my Hinge date must have been recently sick because now since I saw him Friday I'm sick as a dog. I even asked him if he was feeling okay when he seemed off, yet he said everything was ok and blamed it on some other medication. Except I later saw he had cold meds and boogers in his nose, so he lied for his own self serving reasons.
It's too late now. I know it's possible to have caught it from someplace else but I doubt it. It makes me hate him.

I have a fever, chills, aches, congestion, and a swollen throat from the nasal drip. No health insurance (not that it would matter, I think what I have is viral and docs can't do shit for it besides charge a co pay for showing up).

My new job is really chill in that they let me take a long lunch and and early out yesterday, plus a late show today. Supervisor even asked if I should stay home but I came in. I basically can't sleep until I'm exhausted because of the mucus in my airways and general discomfort, so all I'd do at home is lie in wakeful suffering anyway. Oh and I would need to make up the hours to get my 40 in so nah.

I tried to grab a soda from a vending machine on my way in. But apparently I only have $1 left in my fucking bank account ($17 if you count the pathetic $16 I have in "savings"). Thanks to this recruiter that I got this job through, who's allegedly sending me a paper check in the mail for my first week of work. Direct deposit be damned, they can't even guarantee my next check will be direct deposit. It's bullshit but I have no say.
Pretty sure a debt collector for Paypal is calling me because I missed my payment a couple days ago so now they're all bothered at me for money as well. I've tried calling PayPal before when I thought I'd miss a payment, and all the representative told me was that they don't offer help so if it went to a collector that's when I could negotiate it. So whatever, I let it slide because fuck those assholes.

The good news is all I have to do is sit my ass in this cubicle and bank pay until 6:30pm. Unfortunately it's only 10am.
It could be worse. I could be at one of my old jobs threatening me with points and occurrences and whipping me to do flips for customers from the time I'd clock in.

No. 482694

Damn anon. Old people can be poorfags too. Not all boomers grew up fortunate and now they're as fucked as we are + they're old.
Sure, some are just there to ~have something to do in retirement~ but for many it's just sad circumstances.

Idk maybe I'm too soft and forgiving haha.

No. 482705

Nayrt but this really scares me because I know I'll be working shitty minimum wage jobs when I'm boomer aged too. I don't want the young people of the time to resent me for it the way that people resent boomers that need to work still.

No. 482714

File: 1573580411958.jpg (40.06 KB, 512x575, EJIWjBIXYAASmtM.jpg)

This is such a fucking first world problems/"just close the fucking tab" vent but my whole twitter feed is full of nothing but Disney+ and Pokemon discourse.

I like to go through my explore feed and read whatever news or top stories are on there, but today it's just overwhelmingly about Disney. Like… it's a streaming service, why is it taking up half of the explore page? I wish I could mute the word disney but I'm pretty sure muted words don't get blocked on explore/searches unfortunately.

I also keep seeing discourse about Pokemon, with people still shitting on Gamefreak about not including the national pokedex and now getting upset about the animation for one of the apparent legendaries looking like shit anyway. I'm so used to people whining about the national dex, but now I keep seeing people attack others who are still eagerly awaiting the game nonetheless by saying that they're just shitty apologists and making excuses for Gamefreak's shit game, acting so holier than thou with their "I'm criticizing Gamefreak because I want them to put out a good game!" as if it's that big of a deal. It's a fucking children's game, just don't buy the game if you're that miffed about it. Maybe it's because I'm a filthy casual gamer, but I'm still going to buy SS and I'll probably enjoy the shit out of it.

No. 482716

>My gender studies class definitely frequently got hijacked and it was honestly painful to be the only one in a room who disagreed. I would have anxiety attacks over going to class.
I hate to sound trite or use a buzz word, but this was really brave of you, anon. I don't know if I'd have the courage to be vocally oppositional, as well as continue attending after being "outed" and suffering panic attacks over it. Kudos to your strength! It is inspiring.

No. 482723

Just have him murdered anon

No. 482724

Not to be all "Not my generation!" but I genuinely believe millennials are gonna be less entitled and more altruistic by the time we are at retirement age.
If not because
1. We've been made to work shit and underpaid jobs so what's a few years when we're a foot in the grave?
2. We've never been told it will be easier or that we will have a safety net by the time we are that old. So we already expect a shitshow by the time we're in 'retirement' age. It's hard to be entitled to something that you knew was never gonna be around.

No. 482730

This is something very stupid and very trivial but whenever I posted a comment or did a post about something that bothered me personally on MY fb page, there was ALWAYS some bitch taking a stance against me/my opinion. In general I don't have a problem with that but those bitches never ever talked to me, never liked anything on my page, never posted a comment.
So they only commented on my posts when they didn't agree with me. Somehow I remembered this and I got really angry at them and at me. Why can I be a bad bitch and tell them to stfu?! I hate confrontations so much that I'd rather be silent and go away and not defend myself. I'm so pathetic.

No. 482739

But that's the thing, employers won't hire perfectly capable teens and young adults over dumb shit like not making eye contact but will hire elders who do the job poorly. If we have to suffer they have to suffer too

No. 482747


No. 482749

this isn't an angry/annoyed vent, it's more just… melancholic and trying to organize my thoughts and what is concretely bothering me. i'm starting to think the more i get older the more i'm developing schizotypal tendencies. i'm also becoming sharper and more logical, but there's something constantly looming over me and i just don't know what it is. it's not depression or anything like that, i'm actually a fairly neutral person, my relaxed state can even be happy at times but like i said i'm getting slightly schizo but it's nothing serious so far and i think it's being brought on by the fact that i'm repressing how i feel about myself and how worthless i feel romantically… it's ironic how i've always been a romantic at heart and even a hopeless romantic at times when i choose to look at things with rose tinted glasses but i've never had proper love of my own. i turned 23 this year and i've never had a serious relationship. my one and only relationship lasted 5 months and he cheated on me, the mouthbreathing bastard. i'm also prone to daydreaming and living in my head so the more often i imagine pure love with someone the more i bring on schizotypal behavior. i guess it's just repressing the longing for a partner and repressing denial toward my outward appearance (i'm ugly). it's all just a bit tiresome, i know saying all this won't even change the fact that even if i somehow got into a relationship with someone i want it wouldn't just erase the imminent paranoia that would come to me. i'd end up actually disliking or even hating myself truly if i had to go through the same shit from the last time, so maybe it's better if i'm lonely. still unclear if this is a cope or not.

No. 482752

I feel like nobody truly cares about me unless they want something from me. I wish I was exaggerating. It’s exhausting, all this anxiety for people who couldn’t care less.

No. 482756

same. and its not even because my judgment is clouded by depression or anything. they just dont contact me unless they need me as their therapist or as a distraction. i never really had people in my life (except a few from my family) who genuinely cared for me when i give all my energy and time to people i even remotely like.

No. 482757

Lol in what basic customer service jobs are elderly people being hired in droves while teens and young adults are being rejected for being autistic? Even if it was like that, the older people likely have more experience and are more reliable (more open schedules, less likely to not show up for shifts, etc). And yeah social skills do matter in a customer service job. Like…wtf do you expect them to do for work?

No. 482763

None of that sounded schizotypal at all. You should just talk to a therapist if you can.

No. 482771

i don't have any harmful or debilitating behavior or thoughts, there's no need for that honestly but i am aware that i repress some things that lead to these confrontational mini breakdowns with myself. it comes and goes.

No. 482782

you're really giving our generation too much credit.
>we've been made to work shit
no, most of you just stick to working retail and are too afraid to work in warehouses and other types of jobs where you're supposed to get your hands dirty. it's an option we all have and majority of these positions don't require a college degree.

No. 482784

GOD i am so fucking desperate for a night out! circumstances and lack of local friends mean i don't get out for MONTHS. i wanna go absolutely batshit feral at a club! i have a work night out at the end of the month and i am so antsy and excited, but it's just to local pubs. i wanna go into the city and get shitfaced! i want to go insane!! i wanna get all dolled up and look smokin hot and take shitty drunk selfies and just go crazy! why does no one live near me?! it's genuinely upsetting.

No. 482785

So why do social skills magically don't apply when boomers are barely able to communicate?
Also here I always see boomers work in retail or fast food, jobs reserved for teens and college kids. It's just hypocritical to refuse to hire hard working and capable young people over dumb shit but turn around and hire elderly who can barely do their job right

No. 482786

I’m too tired to go to an ACoA meeting tonight because I worked all day today and yesterday. What makes it worse is when I got home tonight I could already tell my dad had been drinking

No. 482787

How so? When I went to a factory job fair and it was mostly young people

No. 482796

I almost got hit today while I was driving.

This is hard to explain but I'll try my best. I was driving through a yellow light and the guy in the opposite side, who was turning left, also wanted to zoom through the yellow light. I saw him going through the light and I was like well shit, but it was too late to stop at that point, I was already past the white line. I tried to speed up so that we wouldn't cross paths, but I wasn't fast enough, and his car was going directly at me. I thought he would stop or at least slow down but he didn't, he just kept going directly at me. His car was so close to me that I literally had to swerve so that he wouldn't hit me and if I didn't swerve he definitely would have. Not only that, but his car would have hit exactly where I was sitting, not the back seat or another part of my car. I probably wouldn't have died, but still.

Neither of us were in the wrong per se, neither of us were running a red light, but he HAD to know he was going to hit me if I didn't swerve. He was SO CLOSE to my car and kept going????? It was like he was intentionally trying to hit me which I find upsetting.

No. 482800

There are hardly any warehouse jobs where I live, and the ones that do exist have requirements that stop me from working there. Trust me, I'd much rather get my hands dirty and be sore than work retail all day, but retail places are the only ones that will hire me.

Also most factory jobs have been outsourced.

No. 482806

You do know most “younger people” working retail do it while in college, right? Of course they don’t want a physically exhausting job doing pickings in a warehouse for the same amount they would get paid in a store.

No. 482810

>retail or fast food
>jobs reserved for teens and college kids
you sound entitled af, those jobs are not "reserved" for any specific demographic. again, what jobs do you expect old people without relevant experience in another field to have? do you think they just wake up one morning and are like "hm i'm bored and even though i'm a retired lawyer who is financially stable I think i'll go take a job from a high schooler at mcdonalds" ???? or that one day you just magically graduate beyond working shitty retail jobs and have a "real" career??? they likely have no other choice

No. 482825

My mom really wants to help with my medical stuff, and I somewhat need her help too, but she's making everything harder. In order to inject my sensor first you have put in the needle then click it out using a certian mechanism. The third time I let my mom help me she forgot how to remove the needle. I couldn't reach it so I had to wait with a needle while my mom flipped through the medtronic guide book. She also didn't tell me she calibrated the pump, if it's calibrsted twice it ask you to re inject the sensor, so when I calibrated it at 9 I woke up at 10 PM with ot telling me it kicked me out. I had to spend the entire night figuring out how to re conect the sensor. She also went to the sensor introduction so she should know how it works, but she still doesn't. She still thinks its like the old sensor so when she says "you should change X" i have to tell her you can't do that on this sensor. She also can't tell the basic shit like suspend before low blood sugar from rising number. The worst part is if I criticise her she gets all "you don't appreciate me".

No. 482841


Anon, I actually got into an accident today. I am really happy that the same thing didn't happen to you and that you are okay. Things like that are incredibly scary, especially when you realize that cars are honest-to-god deathtraps. IDK how the weather is at your place, but people seriously need to be more careful this time of the year. Anyway, I'm glad nothing worse happened to you! Take care!

No. 482850

Jobs traditionally taken by young people

No. 482851

Gross but accidentally dropped my phone in the toilet with my piss in it today. One of the things I always imagined happening but never thought would happen to me.

No. 482852

Why can't I write? FUUUCK. I was having a super good whole TWO MONTHS of consistently writing and even posting my shit and making friends and then suddenly, I start getting anxiety when even looking at a blank Google Doc. It was such a good hobby, such a good cope, and now suddenly I'm back to square one where just the thought of writing makes nervous.

No. 482859

Your phone was probably dirtier than the piss water in the first place KEK

This shit makes me mad too. Like i just get frustrated, because you know they're harassing randos for not agreeing with them or someone agrees but they're not mad enough as them so they just assume they're the "enemy" or something. Honestly they need to calm down, I just try to see the humor when they grasp at straws and see how ridiculous it is. I'm just glad most children don't actually care and just want to enjoy their Pokemon and Disney movies. I mean, us as children, compare to what they're getting now to what we've grown up with. We didn't care either lol.

No. 482884

You must be naive, most warehouse and non-retail positions pay way more than retail. And many people who have these jobs also go to college AND have children to take care of. Don't make up excuses.
College is a choice and a privilege. I know tons of people my age who have college degrees, are out of college, and they are still working retail and now talking about how they have student loans to pay off. Every time I tell someone to start looking in non-retail positions, it suddenly goes in one ear and comes out of the other and then weeks later they keep complaining about how they hate their retail jobs.

I had one retail position, got paid $10.50 an hour. I didn't last a year. I was constantly waited on by customers and co-workers who couldn't pick up the slack on my shift. I didn't get enough break time, most days I had no break time at all, I was working for 7 hours straight. My hours were never consistent or even with the schedule, some weeks I got 12 hours in, others I got in 38. And all of this messed up my sleeping schedule, especially nights I closed and the next day I had to open. My supervisor didn't care when I brought up these issues and neither did HR. I would come home exhausted as fuck, some days I cried before getting ready to go to work because I just wasn't getting paid enough to deal with this shit.
I decided to start looking for a new job and found a janitorial position that paid $12 an hour. It was full time and 2nd shift. Getting that job was the best decision I ever made. My time was consistent, I was guaranteed a 2 day weekend, and the majority of the work was just me emptying out trash bags, wiping tables, and mopping a few floors. The bathroom shit was nothing new because that was also part of my position when I worked retail. The best part was, I chose my own pace. I didn't have to rely on any co-workers and my co-workers never relied on me.
I'm now working a different position getting paid $15 an hour and majority of my work is just observing cameras and driving around in a vehicle with flashers on. The best part about this job is the fact you don't need any degree, just a high school diploma. I have a coworker who's fresh out of high school and he tells me he's so glad he never had to step his foot into retail.

No. 482887


I need a friend like this. Im so bored and isolated and I just want to go out

No. 482890

I'm so fucking tired of getting attached to this fucking type of people who can't take one minute of their day to answer my messages, FUCK you and your shit anxiety and always talking about yourself and always leaving in the middle of conversation. You are one big cunt and deserve all the shit get from other people.

No. 482891

I wish people could stop being jealous about my ltr and most important I wish people could stop trying to sabotage kek
Just because I don’t tell everything about my relationship it doesn’t mean it’s not perfect to me. One close friend is always making small comments about every thing I say about my partner and it’s pretty obvious she only does it because she’s jealous. I mean, why does she have to care about what my partner eats tomorrow? I didn’t ask for her opinion anyways.
People came to me multiple times telling me some things she said about my relationship and even they questioned why she was being so judgemental (also they told me every time they thought she was just jealous kek)
Idk…I could make a list of things she said and did but it’s so childish I think I would start laughing. She didn’t even think we would be last longer and she made sure I knew it when we were starting and now we’re here, 8 years later, happier than ever and she can’t stop.
Yesterday out of the blue she started to ask how much monkey my partner earned and when I told her something in between she was all pissy and replying only with emojis (smiley faces, aaw, ok….)
Last week she asked me if we wanted to marry anytime. I told her yes, some day, in the future. And then she started to talk about how being married ruins it all and that she knows it would probably happen to us because statistics are there.
It’s kind of funny somehow because I feel like she has these moments when she’s holding her rage and at any time she can explode and that’s when she asks me those questions, waiting for me to fuck up or say the wrong thing. Then I stare at my phone laughing because it’s pretty absurd, thinking she’s trying to get me all hurt and sad when it’s not going to happen.
She was always this extroverted girl, funny and sarcastic but she has something which makes her not being seen as a potential girlfriend. I feel kind of cruel saying it but it’s true, she always ended with guys who only wanted to sleep with her and that’s when it ended (her longest relationship only lasted four months)
And I feel sorry for her because if she didn’t act like a child and started to be a nice person, I’m sure she’d be in a happy relationship too. What she does reflects what she is and obviously when she has a date with someone and the only think she talks is about herself and bad about other friends, people ran away.
Then she wonders why people don’t tell her anything…

No. 482892

Wasn’t invited to my cousins baby shower even though she was to mine. Feels bad.

No. 482896

I’m literally dehydrating myself rn because there’s no toilet paper in the house, hasn’t been since day before yesterday, and nobody will go get any while I can’t get to the store.

My only option is to hope I don’t get a uti until it stops raining enough for me to be visible on the walk to the shop.

No. 482897

there's no paper towels/napkins/tissues to use instead? or what about rinsing off in the shower?

No. 482901

If you also have no paper towels or napkins, bring a plastic container into the bathroom with you so you can put water in it so you can wipe your ass clean.
Also, why can't you go to the store? There's none you pass while driving to work or school? Any busses that stop by a store?

No. 482904

i am just so socially retarded. im trying but fuck man i just start talking shit and making jokes all the time and then instead of being myself i just follow the conversation and say stuff that i dont even support because i am so thirsty for a friend. but then im filled with nonstop anxiety because now i have to keep up this image so then i cut them off and refuse to talk to anyone for months and ruminate about all the stupid crap i do. cant even tell if itd be better to just be honest and say ive got no social skills and i lied 85% time or just keep running away.

No. 482908

If it's just peeing then use a T-shirt… Adapt, overcome.

No. 482910

Fifteen kms from the bus, forty kms too far out for delivery, I don’t drive because disabled, and nobody in the house gives a shit that there’s no tp or tissues until they need it.

I’ve been showering but can’t really take ten showers a day even if they’re quick. I’m legit convinced that the goal is for me to get a uti. Last week I brought home a ten pack of bog roll and three other people managed to use or hide all ten rolls before I needed a second one. It’s pretty normal that my needs come after family wants. The reason nobody could get any today was because of knitting and going to the movies.

No. 482930

wtf is everyone else wiping with? even if you live with all men they have to shit eventually.

No. 482931

Yeah once someone else needs to take a dump the fact that there’s no tp will become an immediate problem and they will go buy some right then and there. Just not, y’know, when the packet is empty or when the one person in the household who tracks groceries says we’re out.
Same goes for food, I basically stopped baking entirely cause a sheet of brownies or fudge would be 75% gone before my bf was home to try it. He’d get home just in time to hear complaints because what I cooked had stuff they’re mildly allergic to in it.

Saving up to move, but it’s so shit in the meantime.

No. 482958

I regret taking life advice from my parents. They don't care about mental illness unless it's a guy eating his own shit on the street. I've destroyed my life listening to them, but i'm too scared to run.

No. 482985

pee in the shower binch, feels heavenly

No. 482987

File: 1573655919561.jpg (98.77 KB, 900x520, looknib.jpg)

I'm high key jealous of anyone who loses their appetite when they're stressed, depressed, or sick. It's always the opposite for me.
I'm sick as a mf right now but all I wanna do is eat everything even if I couldn't taste more than half of what I'd eat. The only thing that would stop me are literal physical barriers like an extremely sore throat or vomiting but even during that I'd feel starved the whole time.
I need to be put down.

No. 482989

Honestly same,anon. My roommate entirely loses her appetite when stressed out and mine just ramps up to 1000.

You can try snacking on healthy things! Not exactly what the cravings are calling for I'm sure but it's better than shoveling down garbage.

No. 482990

Me too, anon. But I think when it comes to physical ailments it may be the body's attempt to get more nutrients to heal. So eat healthy stuff, like the other anon said. It can't hurt.

Perhaps even emotional eating is caused by this? Sort of like how anxiety can make you feel sick, the body thinks it's sick but really you're just stressed.

Idk. I'm no doctor.

No. 482993

i'm getting sick of my friend thinking she's some amazing famous cosplayer because she panders to neckbeards and has started to post 'lewd' content on her instagram and twitter. i don't like the term costhot but oh my god? she's selling her soul away for internet gratification and it's upsetting to watch. i've tried to tell her not to but she won't listen, and her bf only enables her. i don't even think she's making money from it?

No. 483012

I was just thinking about this the other day lmao. When I'm stressed or depressed I just gorge on shitty food and literally can't help my cravings, it's like a voice yelling inside my head to consume two bags of chips and a bucketful of chocolate bars. I guess my brain associates fatty foods with mood improvement too strongly.

No. 483013

Guessing you saw my confession possibly and tbh I don't normally lose my appetite this much either yet this time around I am - not helped by bad mental health clogging my thoughts. I read recently that appetite can be largely down to genetics actually. So it's more down to that than metabolism or willpower for a certain amount of the population it seems. So I possibly lucked out genetically in that sense, but my health low-key sucks otherwise so win some lose some lol

No. 483025

File: 1573670850917.jpg (500.66 KB, 1615x1080, 72944833_2352002775060979_6151…)

Its been a month after a close friend broke up with me, i still felt so sad and clueless after all these times…i thought she was the one, we got along well on everything from everyday life, weeb shit to the things/people that we hate. I always wonder what i did wrong, but after she list everything that she hate about me it was the last straw, the sweet and kind friend image in my mind before was gone instead it was replace by something demented and evil. It was hurtful to the very core of my existence, the sad thing is we have a lot of mutual so whenever i saw her liking their photos i felt like i was not worthy of her time and love…im still learning how to move on now, it still hurts but im getting better, im not letting anyone into my life anymore after this because i need time to heal, like really heal.

No. 483057

I have really bad anxiety and a lot of social issues and I get this really dumb high pitched child like voice when speaking to certain people that make me really uncomfortable like my manager for example and it's really embarrassing and I don't know how to stop. My self esteem has always been rock bottom. I don't know why it's like to not be freaking out all the time. It really affects my work life.

No. 483058

i have actively sabotaged every meaningful friendship i had because i'm a bastard who doesn't deserve to enjoy things! what the fuck was i thinking, being friends with people who don't deserve to put up with my shit. honestly astounding i've lasted this long.

No. 483065

Im sorry that you had to experience that. I will think about whether I want to take the class or not more carefully now but either way, i won't let them intimidate or silence me.

No. 483066

Soo I tripped over a display stand (?) And the metal foot of it scratched my inner thigh and then went up to my vag.
Don't ask me how exactly.
It did bleed even like the labia was swollen and still is just not as bad. I went to the gynecologists and he said that it didn't look very nice but everything should be fine If I just relax for a week.
Anywayyyss that shit hurts. A lot. Never get an injurie down there it's the worst. I can't walk properly it just sucks.
It does not look as bad as anyone might think but it still hurts like shit.
I hooe I can laugh about this once everything is healed I mean I'm kinda already bc this is ridiculous kek.

No. 483069

psst there is no shame in blocking someone if you need a break. social media is weird and forces us to keep interacting with people we need to step away from. it should be a leisure activity not an active minefield imo.

if i want people to be mean to me I come here lol

No. 483082

I'm nearly 30 and there's some young teen boys (13, maybe 14) that quite obviously have a crush on me and it makes me feel really gross like I'M the one breaking the law or something even though I've got absolutely no attraction to them (because they're actual children in my eyes) and I've tried to be as neutral towards them as I can. It's so weird. I'm old, like. Go away.

No. 483094

I barely drink, but right now I'm so tempted to numb myself with alcohol.

No. 483108

they are not actual children 'in your eyes'. They are children, period.

No. 483140

That the fucking worst.
My friend once fell onto a fence (flat not spiked) and she had to go to the hospital cause it hit her between the legs and she bled like a mf.

No. 483172

I know? That's why I'm grossed out. I'm not a disgusting pedo scrote.

No. 483183

File: 1573732911941.jpg (35.46 KB, 640x480, 9f1b26e5e932e35d4556fb174d153e…)

I'm still not over cutting ties with my home town area. Basically, a shitty childhood lead me to act out at some point and unfortunate, really embarrassing events. I cut ties out of shame and because of all the trauma with my family. I guess I'm lucky I didn't get bullied all these years but I still felt out of place and misunderstood and like I was constantly being scrutinised and nitpicked for every little thing and every little oddity. Gossip is crap, too, and didn't help my feeling of alienation (I shall make an effort not to gossip).
Now I feel like a scrutinised second-class person for having a mental illness and doing my darndest to recover and live well but never meeting normie expections by a long shot. It never really goes away that I long for that approval and acceptance and put myself down. Kinda my job to develop that secure sense of self but fuck it's hard a lot of times.
Just the other day, a childhood friend unfollowed me on an obscure art account of mine they had found somehow after some time and it really got to me. It's a non-issue really but stands for such much loss and pain and lost potential and dreams of an irretrievable dream life I could lead with childhood area ties intact. And it also makes me wonder why and if it was because of the same painful scrutinity I used to experience when it could be a billion things and not that deep and her following me doesn't mean that much either. It just makes me angry and stirs up stuff because of everything that was.
I mean it's all a non-problem for the most part and normal and ~societal~ and due to my emotional challenges and bad life experience but I just need to cope with the fact that I don't have healthy, wholesome relationships with the people from my childhood and youth somehow. Part of me longs for that and needs to do some healthy grieving and accepting. It's not easy to allow that pain and grieve it and move on from it. But I can do it and it will be fine. I'm in a good place. Life is livable. It's good. It can be good. Become good. I have prospects

No. 483185

Anon I didn't even mess up yet even I am not really friends with most people from my childhood anymore and I have limited interaction with the few friendships I have from my hometown.
I know you're telling yourself it's meant to mean something, but it doesn't and it's pretty normal for anyone whose peak wasn't in middle or high school.

No. 483193

What I thought was going to be a standard cold turned into a sinus infection, fluid in one of my ears, and what I think is bacterial conjunctivitis in one–soon to be both–of my eyes.
I haven't been so sick in ages and I've already missed two, probably going to be three days of work unpaid.
I have to go to an urgent care facility since I'm uninsured, and will have to spend anywhere between $120-200 just for the checkup, which is money I don't have. Nevermind what they'd rape me for in medications.

And worst of all, a date made me sick on purpose because he's selfish. He didn't want to cancel and lied about being sick so I'd kiss him among other things. He sent me some soppy ass sorry yesterday, but he doesn't actually care. Since he's 24 he has the grace of being on his parent's health insurance so other people not being able to get medical care didn't even cross his mind. Giving someone else a cold probably seemed like nbd to him, bc they can just go to the doctor right?

I want to castrate him.
I consider this a form of assault and idgaf if that sounds like the fever exaggerating. Is he gonna pay my bill and time lost? Fuck no.
But I'll bide my time. When I get better I want to build up to humiliate and emotionally annihilate him. It's no less than what he deserves.

No. 483199

The head of my major said I was missing 0.5 credit hours to be able to graduate. For reference, the average class is 3 credit hours. Now I am desperately seeking a professor to provide me with a 1 credit hour independent study so I can graduate without taking another upper level class. The one professor who's gotten back to me so far said she wouldn't be offering them next semester. Fuck.

No. 483214

I'm finding it harder and harder to talk to my bf. He has almost no thoughts or opinions on things and doesn't think much beyond surface level, even when it comes to his interests. Whenever I make a comment on something he throws out his generic stock phrases like "it is what it is" or "I don't know about that." It's how he talks to other people as well. I hate it because it shuts down the conversation completely.

I don't think he understands feelings well either, because he constantly remarks about not understanding how people get upset, angry, or nervous, like it's a choice to have that sort of instant reaction. I tried to explain it to him, and he didn't really get it until I brought up something that made him upset recently (staying late at work). He even has panic attacks sometimes too, but he can't seem to make the connection to that and other people also having instant emotional reactions?

He has very good qualities like being extremely loyal, helpful, and very generous in bed but spending time with him is mindnumbingly boring sometimes. I am very introverted and stay home a lot so it's not like I need to be on some emotional roller-coaster. I just like having interesting and heartfelt conversations with people close to me. It makes me sad because I can talk to my best friend for hours about a multitude of things (and she and I are dumb NEETs) but I can't even muster up a good conversation with my bf…

I don't even know how to bring this up. He would be understanding for sure (another thing I like about him is that he is mature and knows we need to bring up and talk about problems instead of letting them fester), but I don't think he would be intuitive or smart enough to know how to change, even if I give him direct examples.

No. 483215

thanks for affirming that. emotionally, these idealised childhood ties are still on a really high pedestal for me though. it's not something I tell myself. It's a core sentiment and something I have to consciously work through. when the home life sucks and you hate yourself, you learn to put things on a pedestal as a cope. or that's what I did and still do psychologically. even that is a fact I have to learn and find out about myself by allowing feelings instead of surpressing them. you're right though, it's not out of the ordinary or bad to have loose or no ties there.

No. 483217

I would say dump him but I notice you are a NEET. What the fuck are you expecting? Still seems like you are fundamentally incompatible though.

No. 483219

i feel absolutely aimless and worthless and pointless. i keep distracting myself with movies and music but it always comes back to me feeling like shit. i'm dead tired but i don't want to sleep yet, which i then hate myself for in the morning. i just fucking feel like shit and i'm sick of it. i even almost wanna cut because of it

No. 483222

>What the fuck are you expecting?
I don't know what this is supposed to mean. That I can't have a decent partner, or that I wouldn't make a good conversational partner?

No. 483223

I think what she meant is there's only so many quality men out there, and that the ones that do exist aren't shopping around for NEETs. Set your expectations accordingly.

No. 483225

I don't think that's necessarily true. You can have plenty of good qualities besides your occupation. I still have savings so I'm good, and if I have to I will work free-lance which doesn't make the most but I can live fine off of it. I still have things I'm passionate about, but climbing the corporate ladder is not one of them.

I mean I used to have an ex that was what most people would consider "high quality." He made 300k a year and was attractive, but didn't have hobbies or a personality besides work and I couldn't see a future with him. People are more than checklists, and that's why you need to get to know the person more than defining them by labels.

No. 483226

their are definitely a couple of anons who are somewhat "resentful" against Neets with caring bfs, believing those Neets aren't "deserving" of them

Its kinda like standard nice guy tier rhetoric "why does becky date brad he's such a deadbeat jerk, she should be with a nice guy like me"

No. 483227

It's silly because most NEETs have low self-esteem and tend to be preyed upon by abusive men anyway, so shouldn't people be happy for them, they aren't being mistreated for once? Once again women are meant to feel like they have to compete for a good man, there are plenty of them out there so there's no need to fight over them like they are some sort of limited resource. They should be fighting over us.

No. 483230

You suck at math. There are more good women than good men. Unless you're expecting women to double up, women will have to fight for the good men.

It's because we are all so jealous of you NEETs.

No. 483232

No one tell anon that lesbians exist

No. 483234

Nah, you don't have to fight for anyone. They should be fighting for you. That scarcity mindset is what causes people to put up with so much bullshit.

No. 483235

Lesbians are like 5% of the population anon. Most women are straight or seeking heterosexual relationships.

I would say that 70% of women are good and straight and 20% of men are good. What do lesbians do with anything? There's just way more good straight women than good straight men.

No. 483237

That doesn't change the numbers. You're just being delusional or you're trying to reduce the competition.

No. 483238

I hate my voice. It's so damn monotone and middle-lower in range. Guys in video games usually think I'm some 14 y/o kid. Often I've thought about making videos or streams but if they don't have my face they'll definitely need my voice. Lots of cows on snow, w, or pt seem to fake their voice but I get it. At the least trying to change your voice I get. I'm all for 'if you don't like it then change it' which seems to piss people off in regards to voice? If it bothers the owner so much though why not try? Not like the world will stop or it's using full audio changing programs.

No. 483240

>women will have to fight for the good men
I'd rather be alone, good grief. Men aren't worth it.

No. 483241

I hate my voice too. Whenever I'm on the phone with people they say I sound like a ten year old

No. 483243

Ok, I believe you have surveyed every human being in the world and come up with accurate statistics. Just because you see women on here and reddit putting up with shitty abusive men doesn't make them good people, they just have low-self worth and like I said, the scarcity mindset. They redirect their hatred inwards instead of outwards like scrotes tend to do, but it doesn't make them good people or partners. It makes them desperate and sad.

Maybe that's why you see there being more good women than men.

>reduce the competition

Lmao, no. I don't see other women as my competition but my allies. I'm telling women to value themselves more and have men fight for them, not the other way around. We are meant to choose and men are meant to impress and be useful to the woman, it is like that in most species. Men literally kill themselves over us. There is no need for us to fight each other.

No. 483245

>. Men literally kill themselves over us. There is no need for us to fight each other.

You sound like one of these cringy libfems who talk about using their "sexuality" to trick men or whatever

No. 483247

I'm advocating you don't need to extend yourself to please men and you're twisting my words somehow. I keep saying men should go out of their way to please you not the other way around.

Casual sex/fwb/one-night stands are cancer and don't benefit women but men.

No. 483248

The way I see things:
>any job at all
>supportive/not abusive
>compatible sense of humour
>not dangerously obese
Is the bare minimum standard for every guy on the planet that no woman should should settle for anything less than. Though if you're shooting anything more than this, like say chiseled abs, a six figure salary, or an intelligence that puts Hypatia to shame you really ought to bring something more to the table as well.

No. 483250

>Men literally kill themselves over us. There is no need for us to fight each other.
Men only do that for certain women lmao

You just sound delusional and you believe in the Secret or something

I'm just being honest. You're being delusional.

No. 483251

You really want to live like a lioness instead? You want one dominate lion driving off his rivals, eating all your cubs, and claiming every surviving female as his own? If you do you're own your sis, because I kinda like having the safety and stability that's granted from living in a more egalitarian monogamy based civilization instead.

No. 483252

And you sound like a pick-me who is desperate for whatever scraps they can get. Let's agree to disagree.

I have no idea how you thought I was advocating polygamy. I just don't believe in the 20% bullshit. I think there are enough good men for good women and it's nowhere skewed to 20%/70% like that one anon said.

No. 483254

It sounds like you're arguing with that Mary chick lmao.
>weird reverse incel logic
>mix of pinkpill and pickme mindset
Fucking bizarre.

No. 483256

I hate family Youtubers/Instagramers. Most influencers/YT are waste of spaces but I can understand why most of them have a following. Makeup Youtubers can teach you make up skills. LP Youtubers can help you with video games or at least entertain you. And even your average instagram influencer can show you things that you might not be able to see before (Like Coachella or other events). But family Youtubers/Instagram influencers are absolutely creepy and always try to project this perfect image that’s never there. I find it to be the modern equivalent to Leave it to Beaver or all those other 50s family sitcoms that tried to project this “perfect” family that actually never existed. But at least those were cultivated by studio executives. Whereas Family YTs/Instagrammers are actual people who have this smug superiority by airing their “perfect” family.

Also I feel like kids deserve privacy and I don’t think it’s fair that their whole childhood is up on YT without consent. Imagine being 20 years from now and trying to go to a serious job interview and when your potential employers google your name, they get a video of “Aiden goes poopies on the toilet for the first time!”

There’s always unsettling drama surrounding them too. Like the Ace family or that British Family YTers were the dad was caught trying to have sex with underage girls.

No. 483260

>I have no idea how you thought I was advocating polygamy.
The part where you started talking about men killing each other. There's still plenty of places where it's normal for men to outright kill each other to claim the most wives, and I assure you that none of them are enjoyable places to live.

Yes, the most attractive women have plenty of suitors to choose from, but the most attractive men have admirers as well. Your dream man is most likely the dream man of many, and outside of polygamy he can't possibly marry all of them. Show him you're a better match than everybody else by stepping up your game or accept he's out of your league and lower your standards accordingly.

No. 483261

>I just don't believe in the 20% bullshit. I think there are enough good men for good women and it's nowhere skewed to 20%/70% like that one anon said.
You sound delusional and a pick me. How the fuck can you believe that more than 20% of men are good?

You never answered my point. If there's way more good women than good men, then some women will have to fight or choose to do without. It's just reality.

This so much.

No. 483267

Not just attractive, but good quality. In my opinion a good quality man isn't promiscuous. An physically attractive man who sleeps with many women is not a quality partner. And you should put your best foot forward for sure, but a woman should never be a pick-me because women are the ones who pick and choose, not men. If he doesn't like you for who you are or you're not compatible it's not your role to change yourself to suit him. There are plenty of other men.

>How the fuck can you believe that more than 20% of men are good?
Come on, this is like with MGTOW or TRP who think barely any good women exist. You can't see it with limited world view and bias.

No. 483272

Not her but both parties of the relationship have to change to accept and love each other. Basically, what I’m saying is you need to get laid.

No. 483277

Family youtube content was never really my cup of tea to begin with, but since I really enjoy watching JKNews on occasion, sometimes yt will also recommend me stuff from their personal channels. Those family style vlogs are too much for me though. Even if they aren't hamming it up as much as the ace family or whatever (or maybe they are? idk it's been a while since I bothered to even watch family vlogs from any of them), the whole "putting your entire family out there on the internet and monetizing it" is too far for me. The line between personal life and work is so blurred that it might not even exist anymore for them.

No. 483283

>How the fuck can you believe that more than 20% of men are good?
That's an incel talking point

No. 483284

that was an unfortunate way to put it then. you sounded like you were forcing yourself to call them kids even though you believe that objectively they are not

No. 483286

>not enjoying the fact that they have very short refractory periods

No. 483289

I hope a 14 yo boy wrote this and not an adult

No. 483292

Besides the criminal aspect, what is the problem? They're not going to be damaged for life like girls are when their 50 year old uncle fingers them(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)

No. 483294


>child sexual abuse is hot when it's woman doing it to a boy wow what a lucky kid

do i smell a scrot in here?

No. 483296

The stench is quite noticeable.

No. 483301

File: 1573757186124.jpg (23.38 KB, 452x679, images.jpg)

Nobody is saying you should act like a pickme. You shouldn't a be a June that looks the other way while a Greg spends your money on strippers. What we're saying is that the more effort you put in to becoming your best self the more men you'll get to choose from. Desperate and generally undesirable men will line the block for anyone, but the men that are generally regarded as superior will only ever pursue who they regard as the best women.

No. 483305


Yeah I bleed a fucking lot too even tho it's not that deep I guess Idk I can't see everything.
My underwear looked like a crime scene lol
Hope your friend didn't have too much pain tho!

No. 483306

Alexandra Grant and Keanu knew each other for a period of 9 years before they started dating, they were just good friends who eventually devolved romantic feelings for each other

No. 483307

could someone explain these terms ?

No. 483314

Not abuse if it's consented

No. 483316

File: 1573759465761.jpg (Spoiler Image, 296.63 KB, 1054x1450, IMG_20191114_201101.jpg)

>be slim look old
>be fat look young
I just came across a pic of myself at 15 - and jesus christ, it's no surprise why nobody liked me, I look extremely bad and old. Not like a teen who could pass as a hot 20-year-old, but old as in stressed, working 24/7 and being 30+.
I'm not fishing for compliments, I still look bad now, but while my body is disgusting my face looks a lot younger, my nasolabial folds are less prominent and because my cheeks are chubbier my nose no longer looks as big and my jaw no longer that square.
I have such a hard time losing weight and knowing that this (+9 years and lose skin…) will await me just makes me lose all hope.

No. 483322

But they probably wouldn't have become friends in the first place if she wasn't an accomplished woman in her own right. Her outward achievements were manifestations of other inner qualities that good men can find attractive. Showing off your attractive qualities by achieving things in life is a better dating strategy than being a layabout NEET.

No. 483323

Children can't consent.

No. 483326

car parades need to be outlawed. shut the fuck up, you pos

No. 483340

Go easy on yourself.
Humans are complicated and the truth to being liked is more complex than just how you look as a factor. Being harsh and superficial on yourself is likely to project in your outward demeanor and carry the vicious cycle of attracting shallow and judgemental people.
You are a valuable person who's got something to offer. I'm not saying you are–but old, tired, fat, and ugly women are deserving of relationships and companionship all the same. And as we age, we'll come to accept that one way or another. Don't beat yourself up, just be the best you can be.

No. 483346

You honestly look cute in that pic anon, you have a nice jawline.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

No. 483348

I find it sad that I instantly assume any girl with a pastel and lolita aesthetic is into DDLG these days. It's just so mainstream now that it's become hard for me to distance that stuff from it.

No. 483353

yep I get mistaken for a boy/troon regularly because of my voice. My brother was playing CSGO with his friends with a free mic. I said something to him and his mic picked it up, and one of his female friends said "Is that your brother? It's your SISTER? Does she have a dick?"

No. 483358

Yeah, sorry, I guess the way I think about it is that THEY probably don't imagine themselves as children to think they have a shot with me, an adult twice their ages.

No. 483360

Damn. I feel your pain. My voice also sounds like a prepubescent boy. I guess that's why I don't mind using mic in games because the guys that would normally harass me just think I'm a 12 year old male.

No. 483363

please love yourself, not memeing

No. 483367

I hate how my friends have pretty much 0 consideration when inviting me to do stuff. I’m happy they do invite me, but I need to plan my day before accepting any invitation.
I live pretty far away from the big city and there’s very few buses here that go there and some days they don’t even circulate around town. I’m also far from train stations.
People know that, I explain the same shit everytime. A (male) friend of mine thought it was totally ok I had to catch 2 buses and the subway (almost 3 hours to get to the destination) to see him for a ridiculously short amount of time.
Sometimes people just don’t tell me the time I’m supposed to meet them beforehand and just say it on the day I’d meet them, when I already have my day occupied because, well, I can’t guess when the person will call me to go out. It feels like they think I have a whole day available just for them.

No. 483376

File: 1573769787571.jpg (33.77 KB, 522x448, 8ydp8p1.jpg)

Has anyone in the dating scene noticed an influx of obese and ugly dudes thinking they're king shit?
I'm all for confidence, but a lot of these dudes have unrealistic expectations and are awfully nitpicky of women who are even a league above them if they possess a flaw.
I've especially noticed the behavior in fat dudes lately.

No. 483378

Yep. You can thank h3h3 and boogie for that newfound confidence. Also the influx of sex-workers in the past few years doesn't help, men believe the bullshit they tell them.

No. 483380

It's the nature of all fat people, not just men. They feel as if they deserve an Aphrodite or Adonis rather than a trash bag full of melted better.

No. 483384

File: 1573771051806.jpeg (186.96 KB, 545x434, 37892E4E-3BA3-4FF9-8B24-DA14A8…)

This and old guys saying they don’t want an older lady. fuck right off older men, no younger girl wants you unless you have the money to make up for it
I feel like men are used to their looks not being as important because all they see in movies is guys like Adam Sandler being married to Kate beckinsale in movies
Older male celebrities will marry a teenybopper supermodel every 5 years. Even some ladies I know of in real life are really pretty, yet they get with the ugliest hambeasts because they think that’s what they should settle for. I don’t know why society shills unattractive males and attractive females to be together

No. 483385

If you had been on lc for more than a day then you'd know that this is a blatant lie, the number of fat women who expect a handsome partner is minuscule.

No. 483386

Chunky instahos, and basic social interaction tells otherwise.

No. 483388

Samefag as >>483384 but another thing is girls probably think that if they give an ugly nerdy guy a chance, they’ll be better than a handsome douche
They are the fucking worst. The audacity of these cockroach ass males irks me to hell and back never get with a guy out of pity, ladies. You deserve the best, don’t ever feel pressured into dating an ugly guy.

No. 483390

Honestly I really wanted to get into lolita and similar fashion, but I hate the fact that it's associated now with submissive ddlg nymphos or sissies. At it's core it's extremely modest, cute clothing that isn't remotely revealing, why does that have to be objectified? It makes me sick.

Women getting memed into ~looks don't matter it's personality that does~ so they give fat/old fucks a chance and it feeds their ego like crazy. These men end up being more abusive and cruel than your average guy. So you get the benefit of the guy looking like a bridge troll and acting like one. Great.

No. 483391

Sorry this is a late reply but thanks anon and I'm glad you're okay too (at least I'm assuming you are because you're typing). The weather here is usually really icy/snowy here which causes a lot of car accidents but thanks to global warming it isn't like that yet although it has been raining.

Anyways take care.

No. 483392

Instagrammers still put a lot of effort into their appearance, the same can't be said about your average neckbeard

No. 483401

I want to have sex but can't get rid of this belief that it'll be humiliating and I'll never get over it. I really just need to have any kind of a connection with a man, I've never completely had a male friend, no dad, no father figure, pretty much absent male relatives. I don't know what to do because I've gone for too long without socializing enough, I don't know how to talk to new people anymore and I'm terrified of embarrassment. It takes me so long to get over it, I never want to try anything so that I don't have another thing to get over.

No. 483402

A long distance relationship isn't even a fucking relationship. I'm sick and tired of my bf being stuck on a whole other continent. I don't have anything better to do romantically than just wait for him and at least we know when he's coming back but it sucks so bad and I feel so alone. I work hard, invest almost all my free time in my creative hobbies and spend time with friends and family but as soon as I'm in bed I feel like crying, every night. I hate it.

No. 483403

what would cause a young adult to suddenly develop an intense fear of abandonment regarding a significant other, when they have never been dependant on anyone before? why is this suddenly happening with one particular guy?

No. 483406

Listen, I kinda get the whole trans people acting like uwu bois and gurls because in most cases, they missed out on that shit as teenagers and kinda want a redo in a sense. What I don't get is those who want to act adult and so wannabe old soul, intellectual but can't even call themselves a man or a woman instead of boi and girl. Grown ass people. There are completely normal trans guys I know who act and look like normal adults but this shit just rubs me the wrong way.

No. 483437

I just realized that as an adult I don't have crushes on men anymore. I'm very attracted to men sexually and I can like their personalities but I don't feel giddy or infatuated about them like I did when I was a teenager. I have become incredibly disenchanted with men in the past few years due to my experience and things I've witnessed so that might be why. It also feels some times like I'm forcing myself to like guys that I don't actually like because I feel like I'm supposed to like him.

And some times I kind of have crushes on women and feel giddy about them, but I don't want to have sex with them.

I'm so confused and miserable.

No. 483439

Go on dates with some ladies, maybe you can try sex later on, but that’s not what it’s all about. Anon, I think you might like girls. You can’t knock it till you try it good luck

No. 483454

I was ghosted by an online friend. It hurts so bad and I don't even know what I did wrong. I cried because of it. I considered him almost a best friend. We talked for a whole year. How can people be so fake? I feel so used. I am also scared because I revealed personal info and I have no idea what he can do with it.

No. 483458

I often think about offing myself when both of my parents are gone, for I really don't know what I could live for anymore
I have a boyfriend, but I don't know if we will be together anymore until then and even so, I believe it's easier for a partner to move on than a parent.

No. 483462

File: 1573786832845.jpg (256.77 KB, 1440x810, spoilage.jpg)

I've got this lidded plastic organizer in my bathroom for qtips and cotton pads. This is the second time I've done this, but I went to lean in towards the mirror that accidentally pushed aside some stuff which caused a chain reaction that tipped the organizer onto the floor. Spilling the contents. There are qtips everywhere, even underneath that annoying crevasse between the wall and toilet.

I left it there. I don't want to pick it up. I hate it automatically.

No. 483467

File: 1573787375585.jpeg (31.02 KB, 424x426, 6519AD0B-A928-4280-9BAC-237F97…)

Gave a guy at work my discord because I thought since I have no friends irl it would be fine to do, but I was hesitant about giving a guy my contact information since I have a bf. We’ve had a few small convos about anime and just mundane convos about life, never happened to mention my bf. Today at work he gave me a small box of chocolates. I really hope he’s not developing feelings for me or thinking of asking me out, rejecting someone feels so uncomfortable. I’ll probably just try to find a way to mention my bf in the next convo we have but it still feels so awkward as a person who hates confrontation. I don’t know if some people will think I’m an idiot for being unhappy about a guy liking me, but it stresses me out and idk if the fact that I just ate a few of the chocolates makes me a shit person.

No. 483470

>didn't know you had a bf
>accepting his gift and eating it now
New men give gifts because they're ingratiating themselves for a reason. Live and learn.

No. 483476

I'm sorry anon. I've been through similar situations with peers and with customers at work a couple times before where I'm just trying to be polite and friendly but they think I'm going to date them. I've seen memes and complaints about girls unnecessarily inserting "I have a boyfriend" into conversations early on, but being too meek to do so at all ends up making things really awkward way too often. Don't blame yourself and just see it as a lesson learned, if a guy is being very friendly you must try to find a way to casually fit a reference to your bf into the conversation as early as you can: "My boyfriend likes that too," "I did that once with my boyfriend" etc.

No. 483480

You're not being paranoid. The chances that he brought those chocolates because he's thinking of asking you out on a date is high. Especially if he isn't the sort of generous soul that gives random gifts to everyone. That's why it's always a good rule of thumb to mention a partner in the first conversation. You can still salvage a friendship if you explain the misunderstanding, but the longer you put it off the more annoyed at being led on he might become. Oh, and saying thanks for the chocolates by getting him a snack of equal financial but low romantic value like a pack of chips might help.

No. 483481

Mentioning your partner is vital when making an opposite sex friend tbqh.

No. 483482

Yeah those memes are fucking stupid. It's only obnoxious when people do it repeatedly. Just a single name drop is adequate.

No. 483483

> I've seen memes and complaints about girls unnecessarily inserting "I have a boyfriend" into conversations early on
Yess, this is one of the reasons I was too anxious to mention having a bf and now I feel bad.

>you must try to find a way to casually fit a reference to your bf into the conversation as early as you can: "My boyfriend likes that too," "I did that once with my boyfriend" etc.

That’s exactly what I’m going to do even though I know it’ll feel awkward. I don’t really care if he stops talking to me because of it.

No. 483488

I told my husband that I want a divorce. Please pray for me or keep me in our thoughts. I don’t know for sure how he’ll react.

No. 483492

It is actually difficult to be friends with other women. Women do compete and treat other women like shit and bitterly point out what they don't like or deem lesser about the other woman. Men have offered more sympathy and genuine kindness to me than women (including my own mother) have over the course of my life. The only woman I'd actually be open to being friends with is myself, or someone who reminds me of myself.

No. 483493

Trying to figure out my future and I’m getting fucked. I live in the US. The college course I want to take requires health insurance. I cannot get healthcare through my job, my family, or my husband because of reasons. Prior to being married, I was unable to get healthcare on my own (outside of work or my parents) because I’m under 25… but based on my income, I’d get a credit and would be able to afford it. Now that I’m married, I’m able to get healthcare on my own but no longer qualify for the credit so it’s going to be $200+/month. I make roughly 12k a year currently. I could work more but then I wouldn’t have time for the intensive course I want to take and I won’t qualify for as much financial aid as I need. Like??? What the fuck. Guess I’m just gonna never have any extra month for the next year, hopefully nothing crazy happens so I don’t end up in debt!

No. 483495

health insurance is a literal scam, most plans have very selective coverage and for high cost procedures you literally have to talk them into covering it and reminding them. Vote Bernie because even fucking Canada has this shit figured out.

No. 483498

Your husband works? Does he get insurance through his job and would it be cheaper than $200 if he added you to his plan?
I know some employee plans are shit but that's part of the point about combined incomes when you're married.

No. 483499

He works but is still on his moms insurance right now (cuz free to him), so he doesn’t use what his work offers. Based off the paperwork we got when he started the job, it would be basically the same price as me doing it on my own. Which is also the case if I got on my moms and just payed her for it.

No. 483500

>men have offered more sympathy and genuine kindness to me and def weren't doing it because they deemed me fuckable on some level or another
>press doubt

i mean i understand how you'd feel that way, men generally are nicer to you than women if you look ok/only interact with older men/ absolute dweebs/any other factor that would boost your relative attractiveness but like it isn't genuine niceness

No. 483501

i basically got called a bootlicker once for calling the cops on my rapist by someone that knew he concealed carries literally everywhere (including our first date.) the cops didn't try that hard because I waited until he was not in town to report it because i was scared. the cops also were rude because I didn't immediately go to the hospital after to get a kit (I was in shock and thought it wouldn't matter but grew a spine when he left)

idk it still just makes me mad. at least I know to go to the hospital next time??? god forbid.

No. 483502

Cynics will tell you that they only want to fuck you, but I think if that's their attitude it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Scare off everyone genuine and only fuckbois and 'nice' guys will remain.

No. 483503

Watching the situation in HK worsen every week makes me super depressed being SEAfag. There's no hope for my country. We're all living vicariously through the HK struggle.

No. 483504

I'm a leftist and don't generally like cops but you should absolutely call the cops on a rapist. They probably wont accomplish much but its better than nothing.

No. 483505

So tired of getting gosthed by this girl I call a friend. I'm a shoulder to cry on and nothing else, it's been more than a week now and I don't think I will ever look at her the same way now. Definitely starting to keep my distance.

No. 483506

We understand why you didn't. It's a scary process to go through. My friend needed serious therapy to take her open and shut case rapist to court. You're just urged to do so anyway since the the sooner they're locked up the fewer others they can hurt.

No. 483515

singapore is fine afaik.

No. 483522

Singapore was built by Chinese refugees that fled the Communist takeover, so yeah they're probably not gonna give another inch.

No. 483524

I went to look at a dog to adopt last weekend and immediately put in an application for him. The staff seemed nice, esp when I wanted to know more about the dog. They told me he was rescued from a breeding mill, and he seemed fine around my current dog. He didn't have a previous name and seemed ok around dogs but not super interested like playing type but that was okay. So 4 days later I waited for them to call and check my refs, I come to find out on fb some other lady adopted him. No call backs, checked and they didn't even call my landlord or friends/family to check. Shit sucks but whatever, kind of shitty since they seemed eager to let me adopt since I had the same breed. Just so happens the new owners old dog died and was named the same thing as adopted dog, oh and also… they lied to me about him. They told her he was surrendered by owners after they lost their home and couldn't care for him. Uhhh that's totally diff from a mill?? I thought it was kind of sketchy when they said tons of people specifically came in for that dog but all turned away when they said mill so my guess is they changed his story so they could get rid of him quicker(even though I had a solid application.) What can you do though, just glad the old boy has a happy home..

No. 483525

I generally don't like law enforcement either, but I would definitely call them or go to a court house to file an order of protection if I felt like I were in danger.
I've done it twice before and it at least gave me relief knowing I wouldn't see them any time soon.
Whoever called you a bootlicker doesn't realize being in shock, you have trouble figuring out how to think critically. You wouldn't believe how many people call 9-1-1 because they're having a panic attack, it's almost first instinct. Also like you said, most people don't know they can go to a hospital. I don't remember being taught these steps in school, if anything it's told only once or twice.

No. 483528

I need to work out ASAP, I haven't gone to the gym in over a week and I definitely need it. My anxiety is flaring up again and I just feel very blah. I definitely feel a difference when I workout twice a week, helps me feel less sensitive. My car's in the shop right now, but tomorrow it'll be looked at and done. The weather is also getting really cold so I'm doing my best not to restrain myself from leaving the house because it's so cold.
My mental health matters more than my nerves feeling chilly for like 5 minutes. However, if it's way too dangerous, I can easily do some exercises in my household. I definitely feel more motivated and workout longer when I go to the gym though.

No. 483529

I know that feel anon, it never gets better until one of you makes the very hard move. On 5 months now without seeing my fiance and going insane even with preliminary approval of his permanent resident visa.

No. 483535

Idk…there are a shit ton of mainlanders in Singapore
Do you think so? Their government seems extremely cucked.

No. 483539

I started seeing my ex more as a bother and it helped a lot with the negative feelings, I love him unconditionally but not in a romantic way.

No. 483567

i was a moron for trying to stay friends with this guy i briefly dated. it's been years and he's still the exact same guy i broke up with, he's awfully clingy and emotionally immature and it's exhausting to deal with. i also have suspicions that he isn't over me even tho we BARELY dated and he was an emotionally unavailable jerk to me for 90% of that brief period, which is why i left him. i've been trying to ghost him this year (i'm busy too tho) and he just won't. get. the. hint.

he knows i have a bf so he can't act too clingy but he's skirting the line. i know he's like this with other women bc i made the mistake of introducing him to a friend of a friend after we broke up so he wouldn't be sad and now he's a creep to her too (i'm an idiot, i know). i don't want to tell him to fuck off because i don't think he deserves it, but goddammit i'm getting close to. GET A CLUE!

No. 483571

Anyone notice a particular anons arguing style?
>They samefag, claim they were getting accused of samefagging before anyone accused them, often lose themselves and don't keep track of different anons they're pretending to be so mistakingly pull the "I didn't say that, that was another anons post!" Thing when they replied directly to what the Anon was responding to
>Strawmanning and blowing things out of proportion
>Has the "she's still at it!!!" Saying when an Anon replies to their reply
>Overexaggerated others anger and claims everyone is sperging despite sperging herself

I don't know if it's necessaryspeed or whatever but imo they should be permabanned, not only do they have several poor attempts at samefagging while revealing themselves but also repeatedly bait anons and start shit unnecessarily.

No. 483585

my friend keeps calling me fat even though i'm a skelly anachan. i get that she's joking but she won't stop and it kinda fucks me up lol

No. 483586

It really shows who cares when you're sick and live alone. In my case, that would be no one- at least not enough to check on me or help with stuff. I wouldn't mind if it was a week or two, but I've had lung infection for like 2 months and I feel like crap. Can't do sports, I'm tired and unwell… and no one cares. It would be different if I lived with my family or had roommates, but I'm alone and super lonely. The one time I went out was because this one guy (not sure if we're friends) is suicidal and needed someone to spend time with him, take him to the doctor. I did so under the condition I'll go home because it's cold and I'm messed up. But no, of course he had me stay for long and now I feel worse. Not to say I'm being treated for depression and anxiety and somehow that's not something he considers. I wanted to help, it made me happy because he's going to get help now, but whenever we talk he just waits for me to finish my sentence to talk about himself. I don't want to be pessimistic or focus on dark thoughts, but the one I have is: I don't matter. I will never matter. People will only care slightly if I literally run to their rescue. Even my own parents message me mostly when there are things that need to be done, not to socialize. If I didn't post silly things on my social network or reach out to my "friends" and family first, no one would even know if I died. I'd be found half rotten in my "apartment" within a week. Or two.

No. 483592

Did you ask for help?

No. 483596

I get that you're lonely anon. But if someone told me they had a lung infection that's two months in, I'd think it was highly contagious and particularly nasty sickness. People probably figure you need to spend time recovering as opposed to galavanting around. Just look at what that longish trip escorting your male friend to the doctor did to set you back.
What kind of infection even is this?
>whenever we talk he just waits for me to finish my sentence to talk about himself
Typical male self-centeredness, plus he sounds on the spectrum. Got a male friend who does the same shit and he's autistic. Which is probably why he asked a sick woman to take him to the doctor, because he has blinders on and only thinks about his selfish needs.

Stop fighting everyone in the dumbass shit thread.

No. 483624

Yeah, I did, couple of times. I even opened up about this few times, as my therapist recommended. But after I saw no change, I became very discouraging.

Sure, I don't expect them to hang out, but it's not like I get concerned messages either. It may sound demanding but it would have been nice if my parents asked if I need help with groceries. Even if they didn't bring something or help carry the bags, I'd at least be happy they offered. It's not like I want to get people sick (one of the reasons going to shop for food is stressful now, because I don't want to contaminate anything).
It started out as mycoplasma pneumonia, not sure if I just caught something else as I was getting better or not and it's still just that. Antibiotics are kinda tricky since I'm allergic to few of them.
About that guy… yep, he's pretty self-centered. I felt bad though because he really has no one (admittedly, that's his fault). I know it's my fault for being stupid, but I guess hearing someone say they're suicidal mobilizes me.
(Sorry for ranting so much)

No. 483627

I will admit it is awfully weird that your family hasn't asked if you needed anything recently.

I've been fighting a nasty virus myself but at least I've had a member of my family ask if I needed anything.
Anyways, my friends are no show lol. I guess sick people are pretty boring and we generally aren't up to ultra fun things. Maybe they presume we don't want to be bothered, or have nothing to update with besides our conditions.

Anyway, my condolences anon. I hope you get well soon. Just wanted to relate and say you're not alone in your solitude. I'm not sure if it's a normal thing but I've never had friends much involved when I was sick. They avoid me haha.

No. 483631

I don't know how to get better. I feel like a loser trying to connect with people online and off. Words flow so easily from their lips. Everything that trickles out of mine sounds inappropriate, insufficient, or hollow. When I meet someone I click with, I shirk back because I've fucked up the relationships that have gone well, and they remind me too much of them. Or I think they can be spending their time in more fulfilling ways than hanging with me, even with close friends. Can't get a therapist until next year. Thanks to whoever's reading.

No. 483635

I remember from a very young age always feeling fundamentally lesser than everybody else around me, that feeling has never left me and god knows where I picked it up from. It's shitty anon

No. 483637

Come to think of it, this inferiority complex or anxiety has been around since the third grade. I rarely felt secure or comfortable around others. How do you cope?

No. 483643

I try to remember that everyone has their flaws and their own failures or embarrassments, that and as I get older I see how much we're all just winging it in life. The underlying feeling still annoys me but it helps that as an introvert I enjoy my own company

If you're more socially inclined I can see how that makes it harder. Positive affirmations can help (I know it sounds bullshitty) but they can help you slowly replace all that negative inner talk

No. 483724

spent most of the day waiting for my friend to get off work so we could study together, an hour before i have to go to my own work she flakes on me. not that she intentionally wanted to burden or annoy me or whatever but it made me feel so inconsequantial. when it's something she wants to do etc, i try my best to entertain her bc i want her to be happy obviously, but when it's something i initiate, the effort is basically never returned. i mean that's basically my only friend.
why can't anyone care about me as much as i care about them?

No. 483743

Not trying to bait gun control discussion, but every time a school shooting happens, my heart absolutely drops. My best friend is becoming a teacher and I'm so scared of losing her. I wish this wasn't the reality we live in.

No. 483746

my friend is getting on my nerves something fucking awful right now but i KNOW she uses this goddamn site so i cant even vent properly about it since it's an extremely specific situation that she'll instantly know it's me

No. 483765

Thank you! Knowing it's not always the norm makes me feel like I'm not missing out too much.
It's kind of funny because I think we should have many thoughts and topics to talk about when we're sick because, well, it's accumulating. As long as you're not asleep 3/4 of the day.
I hope you're doing better now.

No. 483766

Ever since I lost my job in April my depression and anxiety has been getting worse and worse. We (Me + Husband) live in an extremely small town (Walmart, a couple fast food places, a CVS, a couple banks, and a car dealership, thats it.)
I've applied literally everywhere, for every position, even the ones I didn't really have the qualifications for, and I've only had three interviews. We did OK at first because of our savings but now that is completely gone and after my husband gets paid we only have about $40 a week to use on groceries and gas.

I cant look for work outside of our shitty town because our car broke down, my husband gets rides to his work from his co-workers so its no problem for him, but I literally cant go anywhere, our apartment is starting to feel like a fucking prison.
I have no friends, I was homeschooled all my life so the 50ish friends I have on FB are all ex-coworkers or mutual friends of my husband, none of which ever really talk to me or interact with me, my instagram has quite a few followers but because I'm just an aesthetic account no one really talks to me on there either. I've had so little social interaction in the last six months that I can't do anything or go anywhere without my husband with me, just so he could talk to people so I wont have to.
Our walmart is a 1 hour walk, the CVS is next door to our apartment, but even if I need something CVS has I'll walk to the walmart instead just so I can use self-service check out and avoid contact with people.
I hate how I've become, I was never the most outgoing but I used to be able to talk to and laugh with strangers, I used to be extremely independent and headstrong, and now I cant even make eye contact, I feel so ashamed of myself and how little I'm doing with my life that the few people who used to talk with me occasionally I've completely cut off, now I have no one to talk to. Other than my husband, I dont have a single friend, and I hate it so much.
Between having no money, no job, and no friends I feel like I dont even need to be here.
I'm not suicidal, but I'm so fucking tired of what my life has become, if I had supportive friends, maybe I wouldn't be as bothered about my lack of job, if I had a good job, I probably wouldn't be bothered about my lack of friends. But without both I just feel like a husk of a person, with no personality, jusy wasting air.
I wake up, clean up a bit, check to see if any new jobs were posted, apply, then spend the next 16+ hours of my day refreshing fb and ig over and over. I dont even have the mental energy for my hobbies anymore. I feel like I'm in a constant state of autopilot, like I'm not even a living breathing human being, I just.. exist.

No. 483768

Go to college?

No. 483770

whenever my friends post on social media that they’re depressed or upset im usually the first to message them to ask if everything’s okay, but they never ever do the same for me. i feel so alone.

No. 483775

I'm going absolutely mental about the fact that I'm 1000% sure that I fucked myself health-wise, which can't be really cured because I didn't gave a shit back when I should've bent to the doctor (or wasn't really aware how serious it was). I have an appointment on monday but I feel like I've messed it up big times and I won't let me sleep at night. It also makes me think about it almost 24/7, which is just mentally exhausting. I wish I could leave my body.

No. 483778

have you told them how you feel about this?

No. 483780


..d…do you not understand how much college costs and that would solve literally 0 of the problems op has? if anything that'll put them into even more a financial hole.

No. 483783

they would feel guilty or just not care. they have better things to do then worry about me and im not a good friend either so they probably would be happier if i died anyway. i don’t blame them. im manipulative and bitchy.

No. 483817

holy fuck my cramps are so bad i hate this so much i can't focus on anything ughhh

No. 483818

maybe yiu should try applying for a sport or hobby

No. 483825

Troons and asexuals don't deserve a spot with LGB people. I am so sick of people including them because of pressed social agendas. I don't believe anyone who has sex with a troon is 100% lesbian or gay. No amount of swearing at me or threats of physical harm will change my view.

No. 483828

Your husband should in touch with your local food stamp office. Sounds like he makes just low enough to qualify for aid with you as a dependent. You can be the one asking for it too. When I was a NEET with no dependent, I was getting $400 a month for food and $60/week for gas.
If you’re not in school, the only requirement is that you have to /try/ to get a job. Their government work finding database is indeed on steroid, it may be a bit of traveling for you but I’m sure you’ll find something. People that specifically try to evade employment are made to do several hours of volunteer a week, easy mode, which can be put on resume too. On the other hand, if you’re qualified for food stamp then you can easily get FAFSA grant for college. I attended 4 full time semesters without having to pay a cent, in fact I had leftover grant money for books.
TLDR; reach out to government benefits/work force offices for options. There are resources out there if you want them.

No. 483829

I honestly can’t see myself having sex with a post op troon
Look up “trans women periods”
It’s just leftover blood, pubes and pus from the wound and they’re trying to label it a period, they have to shove a glass dildo up their fake hoo-ha every so often so the wound doesn’t close. FTMs can’t even get hard without pumping their fake wieners up and I can’t imagine how gross and floppy they would feel inside me,
the troon agenda is being pushed so hard you would think there are more of them, I’ve never met one personally idky they’re being normalized (and lumped in with the gays) when about less than 3% of the population is trans

No. 483831

Samefag as >>483829 but Fuck anyone who calls themselves Demi or ace. It’s not a real sexuality, and they just want to be a part of a smaller community

No. 483847

I agree with you on demi, but how is asexuality not a sexuality?

No. 483849

Low libido isn't a sexuality.

No. 483856

but if you have a none existent libido how do you know if you're gay/straight/bi? imo if someone isn't any of those it might as well be considered a sexuality

No. 483871

My coworker keeps randomly bringing up her boyfriend and how he's suffering from Bipolar and it isnt his fault he treats her like shit.

i was sympathetic at first, but she's brought it up all week and i dont fucking care. She keeps saying he's accusing her or cheating, but 'oh no, it's his bp talking.' whatever girl

No. 483872

tr00ns and asexuals really do need to fuck off. It should stay LGB and that's it.

No. 483875

Hope everything goes well, anon

No. 483878

Most people are straight, so I'd assume they're straight as well.

No. 483885

I'm exclusively into horses so I have no sexual attraction to human, am I asexual?

No. 483886

You're a person that needs helps.

No. 483890

Yeah I need help deciding if I'm totally LGBTQXYZ. After all I am persecuted by society.
This a hypothetical question if you haven't got it…

No. 483908

File: 1573880612773.jpg (252.66 KB, 971x648, Screenshot_20191116-160048_Chr…)

>catch a bunch of Pokemon Shield exclusives
>put them on surprise trade, hoping a like minded person with Sword is doing the same
>level 5 Wooloos and Nickits every time after 3 hours of trying

I just want a Swirlix or Farfetch'd, mannnn

No. 483948

No, you're just retarded.

No. 483985

>I'm exclusively into horses
>am I asexual?

Nah, just zoophile, but worry not, theres going to be inclusion for you in pride and a new letter in the LGBTKASDAKDS nomenclature to fit you in soon enough.

No. 483991

>she thinks sexual attraction is the only type of non-platonic attraction

No. 483996

>when about less than 3% of the population is trans

3% of the population is gay or lesbian, trans is way less.

>be first world left

>put all your political capital on 3% of the population who already have equal rights and plenty of representation anyways
>in disregard for more pressing universal issues that affect the bulk of the populace
>lose elections
>the right gains ground
>could it be that people are tired of being alienated and that we are disconected from realities of normal citizens?
>nah, its because everyone is an evil nazi now, deplatform everything that doesn't agree, more witch hunts and purity tests will get us on top, double down on the alienation, make even more obscure pronouns and newspeak.

No. 484010

File: 1573922328907.png (58.45 KB, 225x225, images.png)

30% of the world's population is LGB, retard. 0.17% of the world population is troons. Where'd you get your 3% statistics?

No. 484012

File: 1573923333434.png (602.97 KB, 1274x764, Screens34hot_1.png)

>30% of the world's population

wtf did you smoke? are you fucking insane? the real question is where the hell did you got that 30% bull, get off woke twitter.




No. 484016

The population rises because of troons and straight people identifying as queer.
Remove them and the population will be back to 1-2% again.

No. 484017

Nta but literally the first article you linked
>percentage of American adults identifying as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBT) increased to 4.5% in 2017
Also, one of you is talking about global population while the other is referring to USA population.

No. 484026

For some reason, I like a this dude from my boxing gym and I really want to die. I’ve never liked anyone irl before until now so this fucking sucks. He’s nice and stuff, but I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t like someone like me. We’re very different and I don’t see this working out. I just don’t understand how I can get rid of these feelings for him! Iris making me feel so annoyed and mad at myself. I don’t enjoy having a crush either this fucking sucks.

No. 484031

nta but ok? 30% is still way off. that should be obvious…

No. 484034

File: 1573931354628.jpg (51.71 KB, 500x484, pain.jpg)

>mom calls me and informs me that she got a breast exam earlier this week and the doctor "found something"
>won't know if it's cancerous until after the weekend
>on top of that my step-dad had some complications due to his diabetes and got an infection on his foot
>had to have emergency surgery and get part of his foot amputated
>ON TOP OF THAT his job fired him this week so my family has no income now and won't until he recovers
>i have to find a way to pay for my college housing which means probably going into even more debt from loans
>i'm behind on my school work and it's nearing exam weeks so I'm hitting new levels of stress
>to top if off i got my period this morning so I feel like shit

If this all hadn't happened within of a week I'd be able to process it better, but I just feel overwhelmed. If anything happens to my mom I'm gonna jump off a fucking bridge…I'm sad for my step-dad but tbh this could have been avoided if he had actually told us something was wrong with his foot! Instead he ignored the signs and waited until it was too late, my mom is furious because she didn't even know anything was wrong for weeks. Only have one more semester of school left but I'm struggling to care about anything academic. Fuck.

No. 484036

I'm not sure what I want. I just quit a job that was leaving me completely unfulfilled, isolated, and just empty. Work that I was putting my heart into was constantly being ignored and I wasn't getting any direction for it. I just couldn't stand it anymore and quit and even to the end, my boss treated me with little respect. I started trying to meet people again online for the first time in years during that time. However, I haven't found trying to date or meeting people online to fill that void. I've ended up ghosting people as a result which isn't something I feel great about since they've been nothing but decent people but I just can't bring myself to talk to people online for long. In the past, I've had misogynistic online strangers insult me so maybe I've grown wary of online chatting as a result.

I hate to admit it but out of desperation, I also went on /soc/ for the first time in years. It's incredibly odd to me that I have better-looking guys than guys on dating apps interested in me on there. I'm getting mostly younger guys interested in me and while it's a bit flattering at first, it feels a bit hollow in the end. Now that I quit my job and am recovering from it, I just kind of don't care anymore.

No. 484040

"[Thing]2: Electric Boogaloo" needs to be put to rest already

No. 484042

Itayrt and …that's my point?
Eta: oops I'm an idiot I got the anons confused idk why I said the greentext part on >>484017 bc I'm agreeing with them. My mistake!

No. 484061


Can you count? you know theres a difference between 4.5 and 30%. 4.5 is considered super high and inflated already.

>one of you is talking about global population while the other is referring to USA population.
See if it makes a diference, rest of the world is even less.

No. 484064

Am I right to feel upset in this situation?
My boyfriend was loudly discussing with OUR friend of having a "guy's night" where they'd make high quality steaks and drink beer while I'm at work.
I guess I got a little too jealous looking, like, I more just cared because them making good food and having fun while I'm slaving at work with only so much time to eat anything that is usually just a fucking bagel.
Then I guess he rescheduled it to tonight, I asked why and that he really didn't… have to because he seemed really pissed off over that, and he scoffed and said that it's because I was angry and it was clearly the only way to get me to not be pissy.

Literally I just wanted to hang out with friends and have a good dinner too… I didn't understand why it has to be a GUY'S night and I asked him why I couldn't be included and he said it's because he has no guy friends like what does that mean?? It makes me paranoid that there's a reason he doesn't want me there. I have really bad paranoia about these things (I'm diagnosed with bpd)
I just feel stupid and like an overreaching bitch. I don't want to be the bpd stereotype of never letting him talk to anyone or something

No. 484065

what is that even? i've never cared to look it up

No. 484070

>>484064 yyea, anon you're overreacting.

No. 484073

Why is my retarded mother a degenerate who can't be fucking bothered to close the bathroom door?

No. 484086

Gosh I missed here.
Thank God it's back!

No. 484095

I cut my mom out of my life years ago because I was tired of her lies, abuse, and there's so much I can't get into it would take forever. She works part time at a local grocery store and today when my husband popped in she basically accosted him and started yelling at him, demanding information about our lives, and even called him mentally ill. I feel like as long as this woman is alive my life will be a nightmare unless I can expertly avoid her, why can't she leave us alone and understand I don't want to talk to her. Ever.

No. 484102

To anyone suffering from health anxiety including me, I wish you good health

No. 484115

why does cellulite and stretch marks and body hair and rolls look fine on every other girl BUT me?! i don't care if these things are normal and if everyone has them i feel like a bridge troll when i see all these girls who have everything i have but work or carry it better.

No. 484128

that's so fucking shitty anon, I hope your mom is okay and you figure everything else out

girl same, my legs are so fucking disgusting, even girls who are fatter than me usually have much nicer legs

No. 484135

File: 1574035443134.jpg (132.53 KB, 720x1280, Screenshot_2019-11-17-14-24-48…)

I'm so upset/pissed off/angry right now, this is gonna be so long and I'm sorry, honestly not even expecting anyone to actually read this lmao just wanna get it out

>coworkers with guy over a year, we both quit, we become friends for a while, start dating

>relationship started out amazing, took a downhill turn and deteriorated rapidly
>bf and I broke up 4 months ago after a 4 month relationship (his first relationship, my second)
>bf did douchey things while we were together, here's a few examples (but it's not everything)
>right after he got back from a 3 week trip, I gave him a blowjob and the entire time he kept looking over at his computer screen that was playing youtube
>after blowjob, we're cuddling in bed and he looks at his phone, has hundreds of pictures of anime girls that he's looking at, makes comments on the pictures like "wow I love the detail they put on this fit chick's abs"
>when he wanted me to leave after that he literally just said "I'm gonna hang out with my brother" and handed me my keys
>wanted me to go with him to a pub with his friends, I could have taken my own car but he wanted to drive me for some reason (which would have been find if not for what happened later)
>he has a few drinks
>he wants to sit in his car for 20-30 minutes to let alcohol ware off
>I'm talking about something completely unrelated to porn, he laughs as I'm in the middle of talking, I ask what he's laughing about and he says it's because him & his best friend have a pact to destroy the other one's computer if one of them dies because of the "grotesque pornography" on their computers
>we get in an argument about porn for the 3897th time
>he drives me home, I ask if he's sober enough to drive, he says "I think"
>I'm sarcastically like "oh I might kill my gf but that's okay"
>he's just like "yep"
>I know he was joking and probably didn't mean anything by it but it hurt my feelings, wtf
>whenever I told him something bothered me (like his porn habits, among other things) he'd say it was my mentality that made it bother me or that I had insecurity/self esteem issues
>when I expressed being bothered or disgusted by his habits, he'd act like I was just doing it to kink shame him instead of caring about my feelings
>we break up, I've told him repeatedly that I have abandonment issues, he says he doesn't want to abandon me and help me get on my feet (I was friendless & jobless)
>he says he wants to be friends and see me like once a month
>I say it will be harder for me to move on if we're still friends, but agree to be friends anyway because I have no other friends and will miss him
>however, he literally never texted me ever after we broke up
>I texted him once to say hi, texted him a second time a few weeks later to say I felt like he didn't want to be friends with me and was avoiding me
>he gets butthurt and says that I'm patronizing him and trying to make him feel bad, says he's "still having a hard time over our breakup"
>I text him again like a month later, asking him why he wanted to be friends with me, he just said it was because he didn't like being on bad terms with people and didn't think I was a bad person
>the last time I texted him he said that I was being "insensitive" (lmfao)
>yes, he makes jokes about killing me while driving drunk, and looks at porn in front of me after we have sex, but I'M insensitive
>I try to point out his hypocrisy time and time again but he never acknowledges it
>it literally drives me fucking insane that I can't make him see his own hypocrisy
>he never takes responsibility for his actions, always acts like the victim and I'm this evil abusive ice bitch who just wants to make him feel bad
>I realize I'm never going to get over him if we're still "friends", I need to break it off but don't know how
>I texted him yesterday just to test the waters and see how he acted
>we had a short conversation, I told him I missed him and he never replied

honestly there's way more I could say but this is already too long. I'm thinking of just blocking him instead of telling him I can't be friends. I hate it when people do that to me, but I'm pretty sure if he wanted to get rid of me he would just block me anyway. I would prefer a more conclusive end to this but I know that if I text him again he's just going to act like I'm bullying him and it's going to piss me off. and yes I know I'm a pathetic ass bitch.

No. 484139

He's immature and you're clingy. Sis, I'm saying this for your own good but if he really cared about you and prioritized you, he'd at least text you or reply when you do.
You're clasping onto him because you don't have anyone else, and that's the actual problem. If you had some other friends or even started to see someone else romantically, you wouldn't tolerate this treatment nor pursue him because you'd have another option.
Just block him, he's done enough to you.

No. 484144

Why bother with someone with a porn problem. I’ve had my share of bad relationships and attachment issues but fuck. Just let him move on to the next poor girl with low self esteem so he can repeat the same shit. Don’t be that girl. Be better than that. Don’t give in when his shitty ass comes crawling back either

No. 484147

def block him, in all social networks, his phone, everything, also don't stalk his social media, it will be hard at first but in a little bit you'll be the happiest ever, he is literal trash and you don't need him. You Got This!

No. 484159

one of my friends won't stop shit talking all of our mutuals. it wasn't an issue at first because she was talking about this guy we've all been having a problem with, but i recently became friends with one of her friends and she is trying to get me involved in his drama. she apparently has been sitting on year old drama and wants me to collect information from him about it, and confront his girlfriend (who i have never met) just based on a hunch she has.

why the fuck hasn't she done this already? i am not getting my hands dirty so she can watch her friends' drama.

No. 484180

thank you, I know you're speaking the truth and I need to just move on but I kept wanting to believe he'd reach out to me so that I would feel worth it. I need to just accept that's never gonna happen and stop basing my self worth on stuff like this…

No. 484195

Thank you for this. I'm currently trying to calm down after a long (good) day with friends.

No. 484213

im scared. I think my dad is missing. I was downstairs in the kitchen when my mom got a phone call. She left the room to answer the call which i didnt think was too weird. She was on the other side of the kitchen wall though and i heard her say “they cant find him?” on the phone. Then, a little later when I was back upstairs, my mom texted me asking if my dad “had contacted me today.” I asked why she asked and she said she was just wondering since he had contacted her too, but i think she could just be holding back information from me since she doesnt want to stress me out. I know my dad has problems with depression and takes meds for it so im really worried and my heart is thumping

No. 484215

want to sleep but my mother is blasting music and singing to it and talking to the tv. I just gave myself a headache from playing my own music loud enough through my headphones to drown her out. i havent slept well in years and im seeing a doctor tomorrow for sleep problems so this is just painful. she laughs when i get mad or tell her to fucking stop so i cant do shit.

anons are gonna wanna pass quick judgement like "lol move out" or "lol thats not that bad" but obviously this isnt even close to the whole story, let me vent for one second, thanks.

No. 484218

I hope he's ok Anon.

No. 484222

Thank you me too anon

No. 484224

It can sometimes be more relaxing for guys to hang with guys than it is for them to hang with mixed company. The same as it can sometimes be relaxing for girls to just hang with girls. Let him get his fix occasionally and he'll be freed up to love you more in the mean time.

No. 484225

You don't need a loser reaching out to you to be worth it. You're worth it already. The sooner that you drop him the clearer that will be.

No. 484243

anon that's terrifying, I'm so sorry you're going through that. I hope he's alright.

No. 484272

I took such a nice picture of myself, I can scarcely believe it's me. I showed the guy that I'm kinda in a LDR w/ the picture (I'd been agonising over this for months bc I just feel so ugly in photos) and his comments were really sweet. Now, I just feel like the picture is misleading as fuck even though I didn't use filters or any makeup besides mascara. I look so ugly in pictures now, even though I need to get my brows threaded and stuff. It's like my eye area is completely different? I don't know if it's because of pre-menstrual bloating, but I'm probably going to meet him next year and I don't want him to think I'm a catfish.

No. 484274

I really hope you're doing well and that your dad is okay!

No. 484276

A local cow keeps spamming and liking my shit even tho i never reply these days due to her being a mess, me and everyone who knows her can't stand her. She's the shittiest influence and crazy enough for me to be scared to block her ass.

No. 484279

You're being very toxic. Your bf should be allowed to have fun with other people than you.

No. 484280

This has nothing to do with "Guys and Girls". Just let him hang out with his friends sometimes…

No. 484281

What does it mean you are "kinda" in a relationship? Are you playing this dude?

No. 484283

File: 1574079683255.png (66.03 KB, 354x292, 3dd2d66b-b838-4301-b219-131145…)

My only option to have a somewhat normal life right now is to save up money, move to a different town and find a roomate. Might sound easy but I have no idea how, what or where to start. Most people who are looking for roomates are students and I'm not one, which means there's a chance I'd get kicked out once college or whatever ends. I'm also terrified of moving out to a bigger and somewhat unknown town.
What if I fail and just waste more time? I have to succeed asap because my parents won't be around forever and I can barely count on them now. I just want a stable life jesus fuck why is this so hard??

No. 484285

>What if I fail and just waste more time?
If you try moving it MIGHT be a waste of time.

If you do nothing it's 100% a waste of time.

No. 484290

People are saying you're overreacting, but I think you should think about why you feel paranoid and evaluate it.
Does he have an actual pattern of weird behavior and/or secrecy? Does he make it a continued point to exclude you from things? If this is the first time anything like this has happened, you can safely say it's nothing and chalk it up to your own personal hang-ups and maybe some jealousy (like you said). If he does act this way often, though, then you might not be wrong to feel uncomfortable about this.
Even if there isn't some big reason he doesn't want you there, it's definitely possible that he's too callous (as in he doesn't look out for you and try to make sure you have good times, too). There are tons of guys like that, and they suck. Best of luck, anon.

No. 484294

good response, anon

No. 484297

I think you have a point. I'm running out of time as it is, might aswell risk it. Guess 2020 is going to be full of taking risks. Thank you.

No. 484301

No. I like him a ridiculous amount, but we haven't actually called each other girlfriend/boyfriend. We joke about being married and stuff like that. I'd never play him, he's wonderful.

No. 484305

I was looking at the profiles of a few friends I had in elementary school from a forum about a children's book series and they're all doing well. I'm really glad because they were really amazing friends, but at the same time really sad we didn't keep in touch.

I was groomed during middle school until high school and it made me into a really horrible person. I didn't talk to a lot of these people because I only cared about spending time with my abuser. It's fucked up because in my whole life, these were people my age who actually cared about my abuse and really tried to help me, and cared about me. I feel like shit because I wish I had held onto these friends, but I don't want to come into their life now of course.

Right now, I'm just a person with a lot of baggage and we probably have very little in common. But I am really happy they're still out there and they're still good people, helping people, making the world a better place. It makes me really sad, but at the same time I feel better that the world isn't completely shitty. It just hurts.

No. 484318

File: 1574084353907.jpg (26.88 KB, 960x720, 8349809854938.jpg)

For the past two nights I've left Moomin episodes streaming on my laptop next to my bed while I sleep, and I've had crazy Moomin dreams. Adventures in my own fucked up dream sense, but it's cozy still having them there.

No. 484335

Do you nitpick his eye area in every photo he sends for evidence of catfishing?
Chill out anon, it's normal to feel self conscious about how you look and accepted that people only send the best possible photo. Guys normally can't tell the difference between a filtered photo and a bad photo either, if he's a decent guy and he likes you then it's not a problem. Rip the bandaid off and have a video chat.

No. 484337

Went on a date with a decent guy and he asked for my number. I texted him a couple of days later about possibly meeting up again and never got a reply back. It just blows that I’ve had two guys from Bumble do this to me already. Why bother asking for my number if you aren’t even that interested?

No. 484358

Saw a post on reddit where a 17 year old wanted advice because her parents make her babysit younger siblings when they go out on date night. They didn't go into much more detail other than it annoying them because they want to do other things with that time. Of course there's a response of "You should check out the Raised by Narcissists sub" … and she starts a thread on there too. What is with people turning everything into abuse and narcissism? I see people directing teens to this board all the time over normal teenage disagreements with parents and convincing them their parents have serious personality disorders??

My experience with Bumble has been that guys on it aren't ones to put much effort into even keeping up a convo going. Have heard alot of similar experiences where guys on there are so casual about it that nothing comes out of all that chatting or even meeting them. It has a reputation for that

No. 484361

Nothing ever works out for me I swear. Just when I thought I finally overcame one thing that completely destroyed my mental health, I get a few months rest and face another problem might actually be ten times worse and completely ruin my life. It made me even harm myself again, and I just wanna fucking die.

No. 484367

I don't really feel for parents who use their older children as unpaid caretakers for their younger children. Maybe it doesn't fall neatly into the category of narcissism, but it's a kind of selfish parenting style that I think is pretty disgusting.

No. 484370

found the american

No. 484371

Nothing was wrong about what she said.

No. 484373

Ive been living completely alone for 3 years with my pets and they just recently passed away at the age of 8 which was a good long life for them and I'm so thankful for our little family and how much joy they brought me. I live 2 hours away from my family and friends. I haven't made any new friends in my new area because its isolated and weird (I've tried I don't like being alone, I love being social and before moving up here I had a better house with an ex fiancé at the time and our house was basically always opened to friends to come stay. I have a boyfriend but he's been mental himself recently and made friends with some local scumbags that can give him coke whenever. Which has caused us enough issues that I've been coping by being more solitary with my animals but now they've all died. My family have always been shit (child abuse) and the various therapies and speaking to therapists can't change how utterly lost I feel with how my family behaves and acts towards me. My mum still plays mind games endlessly with me guilting me constantly always making me feel lesser, my dad's wife doesn't want me to have anything to do with my dad who was the closest family member I had but that was years ago. My animals have died, my bf is probably in some coke comatose right now out of action. This weekend I just couldn't hide my sadness and literally what that meant was that I did not provide all the conversation and affection etc for my bf that he spent the entire night calling me names, telling me to pull myself together etc etc. This doesn't even sound bad, but I've put up with so much bullshit from people and never honestly expect much sympathy from people because it's rare if it happens but I just, I loved my little animals so much and they always made me light up when they were just mentioned and if you know me you know that I loved my pets and they meant everything to me. Not one family member has even expressed condolences when I needed help with the vet bills (I didn't even ask for much and was going to pay back but one animal had 3 surgeries all unsuccessful and the other one had exploratory surgery and had to be put down two weeks later. It was extremely difficult to deal with alone, it was expensive, and when there was only one animal left I felt very loyal to him and hardly left my place because of how low, sad and depressed they seemed.

It just really sucks. Living alone in this apartment properly is horrible but after how much of a cunt my bf is I'd much rather cry by myself than feel bad for being sad in his presence. Honestly how dare I.

No. 484375

It was keeping an eye on her 12 and 13 year old sisters, hardly a disgusting task lol

Most people pointed out that 13 year olds don't even need babysitting so apart from just staying home what's so difficult?

No. 484376

'narcissism' and 'american' shit aside, why is it acceptable for children to watch other children? i don't think that's appropriate at all and is a hallmark of poor parenting. if you have the means to hire a competent adult and you're pulling this shit, you're a crap parent. i can't imagine leaving my child in the care of a teenager that doesn't want to fucking be there.

No. 484380

Are you ESL?
Babysitting a 12 and 13 year old isn't literally disgusting. What's disgusting are parents who have the means and capability of hiring a babysitter but choose not to. Instead forcing their older child to watch after children that aren't her responsibility whenever they want to go out. Because her parents are 1. Cheap and 2. Think nothing of their own child's time and feelings.

It would be one thing if she volunteered her time, but otherwise it's fucked up that she can't have a life or any spare time cause she's bespoke to watch kids that aren't hers. Horrible.

Why carry on the relationship with that gutless coke addict? He's just making you feel even more lonely and worse.

No. 484381

Someone please explain why my boyfriend is so hyper after getting out of work? I'm exhausted and he usually does more work than me, but he can talk for hours if he wanted to.
I tried to make him do some BuzzFeed quizzes with me a few minutes ago, but every answer and choice I read out to him, he had to go off on a tangent about one of the choices.
For example: We did a quiz about building your own sandwich and I read out to him the choices; rye, white, wheat. He goes "People who eat rye for a sandwich that isn't a Reuben are weird. There's some guy I used to with with who would eat rye bread…" and he would go on for a minute about this old coworker. I would have to remind him to choose something because there's like 10 more questions.
I dunno, I want to hear him talk and discuss things with him, but I'm so exhausted after work I can't hold a conversation.

No. 484382

you realize many baby sitters are also teenagers right? and they only want to be there for money. it makes less sense to me to hire someone if i have a capable teenager who already knows my kids.

No. 484383

Oh, no wonder you stan this. You'd do this to your own teenage daughter.
Newsflash: Your poor teenage daughter also wants money for her time, and if you're going to force her to do it out of guilt and obligation that's the least she can do while you stifle her independence in lieu for your selfish needs.

No. 484384

So triggered by babysitting lol

No. 484386

I'm not the one triggered by a reddit story where everyone called this behavior narcissistic to the point where I had to bring it to lolcow for validation….

Btw, you're still wrong.

No. 484387

Somebody book me into intensive therapy, I did unpaid babysitting as a teen too

No. 484388

no, most babysitters are not teenagers anymore. maybe back in 1999, but not now. people are thankfully realizing that a babysitter needs to be capable of more than just literally being able to physically dial 911. teenagers should not be babysitting. there's a reason why most teenagers are not thought of as being able to care for themselves and make thoughtful decisions, because they're literally underdeveloped, on top of the fact that they're glued to their phones. i want a half-cooked human caring for my 'precious cargo' to save a buck? it all becomes very obvious that these parents who claim to love their children so much quite obviously don't care for the needs of either child. most teenagers are not competent enough to be watching children alone, paid or not.

No. 484390

Sure but you shouldn't do this to your own teenagers. Maybe "Well I turned out okay!" isn't the best logical defense.

No. 484391

many and most aren't the same. learn to process information, anon.

No. 484393

I've realised recently that I have a bad habit of associating being vulnerable with embarrassment and being weak. I think i've shown so much of my soul a few years ago and told all my feelings out loud and it's mostly just brought me humiliation and regret. I avoid talking about my emotions at all costs, otherwise i see myself as being weak and relying too much on other people, like i wanna take control of what i'm going through on my own. And this bleeds into other situations when other people open up about their pain, especially about mental health, that's a topic i'm really not comfortable talking about or hearing about in any way thanks to a lot of past experiences, i just shut it out before I get too uncomfortable. I don't wanna be associated with that stuff. It makes me feel like such an insensitive bitch sometimes. I just hate confrontation and the idea of being exposed like that, it makes me feel embarrassed.

No. 484394

Asking your teenager to keep an eye on their younger siblings every once in a while is fine. Why is this such a big discussion???

No. 484396

Isn't there a difference between spilling your guts unprompted versus sharing a moment of vulnerability with someone after they've shown you theirs? There's gotta be a happy medium between being an overemotional case or a cold bitch.

No. 484397

It's gone from being a normal and common thing when I was a kid to being disgusting/narc behaviour now. I mean the middle ground of 'It's not ideal, an adult should mind them instead' is probably best but the OP vent was about people overreacting and even the reaction to that vent was.. more overreacting kek

No. 484398

because most people on this site, and this board specifically, are mentally unstable as fuck.

No. 484401

The teenager expressed their own need of wanting to do something else with their time and her parents steamrolled it because they put their own selfish desires first. These kids are not a teenager's responsibility.
If you see nothing amiss about that, I feel sorry for your kids.

No. 484403

once in a while is fine, but many parents appoint their eldest daughters as 2nd duty mom, caretaker, housekeeper, etc. to the point where it strips the girl of being able to explore herself and her world for herself. giving your children adult roles like that, or treating them live your mini therapist,or 2nd shift wife/husband is abusive. I forgot what the term for it was tho.

No. 484405

This. Every time I see parents talking proudly about how their older kids take care of the younger ones, I feel bad. They've probably had to deal with that since the birth of their little brothers and sisters. When the oldest kids have to make sure the younger ones get up in time, eat right, get dressed etc. they miss out on their own childhood and are cursed with the feeling of constant worrying and fear for having to take such great responsibility at a young age. Like it's one thing to be there with your 13-year old sibling every now and then and make sure they don't have a house party or something and maybe warm up a pizza but when your parents make you miss out on your own personal life due to your obligation to babysit it's just unfair and all sorts of inappropriate.

And naturally it ALWAYS happens to daughters. No parent ever made their son look after the younger siblings.

No. 484406

Honestly the real discussion should be why those parents think that a 12 and 13 year old need babysitting. Unless the kids are legit retarded, that age is plenty old enough to spend an evening on their own.

No. 484407

Something like this happened to me too. I hated all the pictures I took but I finally took one I liked and sent it. But I realized the lighting was bad and it hid some of my actual features so I felt kind of like a catfish. We stopped talking so never had to send any pictures after that thankfully.

No. 484408

Bit off topic but so many anons on here are in LDRs, like way above average

No. 484411

>And naturally it ALWAYS happens to daughters.

This right here.
I know firsthand because my mom is perpetually bitter at my grandma for forcing it on her to constantly watch her two younger brothers when they were growing up. Even sicker is if they caused trouble or hurt themselves, she'd get the blame. What's more is that not only was babysitting used as a tool to take the burden off her parents, but they "kept her busy" constantly as a form of control.
She placed a lot of inappropriate expectations and responsibilities on me as a kid, but one thing she never asked me to do was babysit. She fucking knew.

No. 484416

12 and 13 year olds are retarded and can barely take care of themselves unless they've been expected to do so since even earlier in age (like latchkey kids).

No. 484418

Probably because a good portion of this user base is made up of shut-ins who mainly socialize online.

No. 484420

>unless they've been expected to do so
Which I think should be the norm for all children. Americans (and perhaps other countries, but this is my perspective as an American child of immigrants) baby the absolute fuck out of their kids. If you want to go on date nights and leave your middle schoolers at home you should teach them not to be absolute chimps. I see so many helpless kids who don't know how to do fucking anything without their parents and it infuriates me because it doesn't have to be that way. Kids are pretty dumb but they learn fast.

No. 484424

I’m beginning to resent my husband. He pays all the bills because I’m in school. I’m trying to find a job overseas bc I followed him for his work. I’m interning around 20-25 hours a week, going to school, working out before interning 2-3 days a week, and keeping the house clean.
He just comes homes from work and plays video games or watches tv. He sees me cleaning and doesn’t help. Sometimes he will ask if I need help when I’m finished (and he is probably well aware that he just waits until I’m done to try and help). If I do ask for help he just says I don’t do anything and he pays all the bills. The best fucking part is all I ask ALL I FUCKING ASK IS FOR HIM JUST TO CLEAN UP AFTER HIMSELF. But I still find his macaroni and cheese dishes in the sink his towel on the floor etc. I tell him I’m not his fucking maid but he just tells me to shut up. He doesn’t even help with our dogs.
I’m starting to see he’s just a misogynistic neck beard who isn’t overweight or actually physically has a neck beard.
The sad part is when I do get a job that I can pay half the bills, he’ll still expect me to do the household chores.
Like I don’t mind cleaning, I just hate picking up after him like I’m a maid or servant.

No. 484425

first world vent but they closed off the kitchen upstairs for construction so I can't use the keurig and get the good earl grey (we have a different coffee machine down here and the earl grey tastes funky), and now they blocked off the kitchen on this floor for construction too so I can't make any more tea or get any hot water and it's fucking freezing in the office!!! We have one more kitchen downstairs but it's too far away from my desk phone that I can't run back to answer a call if it rings (upstairs isn't completely closed off and I can hear the phone). I'm just cold and want tea.

No. 484426

Men who pay more towards bills (even when it's a temporary thing) will in my experience feel entitled to a maid gf. That and they go on to throw it in your face as soon as you argue about anything

No. 484427

His behavior won't get better after you get a job, anon. You'll just be the maid after you've come home from a day of work, having to pick up and clean while he plays video games. The least you can say right now is that you're not paying half the bills to be treated this way, but in the end, no mature adult comes home and goes straight to funsies all the time.
Don't settle for it, you deserve better. Let him live with some slobby girl who doesn't give a shit if the place is a pigpen.

No. 484429

>No parent ever made their son look after the younger siblings.
???? This is insane and not even close to being true. I've definitely seen enough Intervention episodes to know (lol). Sure, girls mostly get stuck with this type of duty, but no parent ever has done this to their son? That's ridiculous.

No. 484432

jesus christ calm down anon. kids babysitting other kids for a short amount of time is good as it teaches them to be responsible. stop thinking in such an extreme black/white way.

baby sitting younger siblings =/= your demon parents have stolen your entire childhood.

No. 484434

Yeah you could suddenly match his wages tomorrow and his behaviour wouldn't change, he has already decided he doesn't respect you

No. 484449

That's true, I don't nitpick his photos at all. Thank you anon. I think it's just my anxiety acting up + PMS that's making me a bit emotional about my face, especially since I've broken out in spots.

It really helps to hear common sense from someone else though, thanks again. <3

No. 484464

He's cheating on you. Burn all his possessions and dump him.

No. 484468

I hate how, even years after changing my lifestyle and diet completely, eating healthy is still very much a conscious effort. I simply don't enjoy most healthy food, no matter how they are prepared. Almost every meal I have to force myself to eat because it feels pointless when I won't enjoy it. I feel like my massive weight loss since cutting out sugar and refined carbs can be attributed more to the fact that I hate 99% of the food that's available to me so I eat a lot less.

I know it's probably got something to do with my ADHD brain being addicted to the junk food that it used to get all its dopamine from, but after a few years I feel like it should be easier and I should stop craving bad food so much at this point.

No. 484470

saw a beheading video and it's fucking me up
how are men so evil

No. 484479

Does your name begin with an R?

No. 484484

I had a very vivid dream of my boyfriend cheating on me. Vivid as in I saw him fuck another girl. She didn't look like anyone I knew, in fact she was even kind of ugly and someone that wouldn't probably be "his type". I literally went there, dragged her out and said "get the fuck out, whore". I was very angry but no one else in the dream ever said anything at all. I mean it was surreal and ridiculous but my insecure ass is still shook about it. Of course I didn't tell my boyfriend because I'm not that insane but inside my paranoia just increased x100000. Realistically it's not very likely he would cheat, he is in fact so shy around women that it was me that made the first move. He also doesn't have a very high sex drive due to csa trauma (I have the same but my drive is still a bit higher than his). But still. This kind of shit makes me wonder if I'm bpd or something because I feel so angry and sad and abandoned from being cheated on in a fucking dream ffs. I grew up with a pos abusive-in-every-way father who cheated on my mom regularly (my mom knew this and often made bitter comments about it to which my dad responded with the usual "hurrr you're paranoid" even though there was plenty of proof). my mom "stayed for the kids" (awful choice but yeah) and filed for divorce only after we were all teenagers/young adults.

So yeah tl;dr I had a dream of my sweet bf cheating and now I'm freaking out because my dad was a cheating waste of oxygen and I'm afraid it'll happen to me lmao I am insane. I'm so tired of being crazy and insecure and feeling like I constantly have to suspect or I will be abandoned, hurt, humiliated. All this over a dream. Jfc.

No. 484485

>he doesn't pursue, I had to ask him out
>he doesn't fuck because of his past trauma
>I have trauma because I grew up with abusive and cheating parental dynamics

Maybe you had the dream because your brain has something to say about your "sweet bf" and what you actually need in the relationship. I'm not reading that everything is hunky dory, you've said things that are rooted in very tangible reasons to be insecure. You need to talk it out.

No. 484496


Well, I read about dreams and they say cheating dreams are mostly insecurity and that the cheating is a symbol for something getting between us, not really actual cheating. We do have sex and we talk pretty openly about anything so it's probably not that. Maybe therapy and going through my family history makes me see these dreams? I talk about my dad a lot in there because he was responsible for like 95% of all the traumatic memories in my life. I'm generally afraid and suspicious of men so that could also play a part. It's just unfair to someone like him who never gave any reason to suspect shitty behavior. But yeah guess I'll bring it up, just need to calm myself first.

No. 484502

My skin is breaking out, my brain is going haywire again over my ex, and I can't stop craving fucking chocolate candies even though chocolate is my least favorite type of sweet. I'm sure it's my period and I want it to be fucking over!!! I can normally deal with these things but having all 3 happen at once is driving me nuts!! I've also gotten super self conscious about the calories I consume and it's fueled by my paranoia of me gaining weight and my terrible body image reappearing and I fucking hate it!! I was doing just fine like 3 days ago!!! Fuck!!!!!!

No. 484506

A girl who i called my best friemd and a sister for years, turned into a budding alcoholic and just unpleasant pos. It's been years since we talked because it ended pretty ugly, I called her out on her absolute bullshit and she was just defensive. Few years after that, she sent me the longest message apologizing and admitting being a pos and how i didn't deserve all that, I never wrote back. Now she reacts and replies to my ig story like nothing ever happened? REALLY? Fuck off, I don't need your bullshit, I missed her so much as she turned into this vapid mess but I do not need her drunk ass.

No. 484507

>>484502 you were ok 3 days ago, you might be ok again 3 days from now, be gentle with yourself, anon.

No. 484509

File: 1574108950530.jpg (57.1 KB, 750x735, 789591e5aee5552b63569b5aae9f91…)

Thank you anon, I needed this.

No. 484510

>>484470 saw some of those back in elementary school and ever since then, been so overconcious of how soft necks are. It's also fucked up how the people sound while getting beheaded and how they're alive, then 1 second later dead. My brain is too small to comprehend it.

No. 484511

>>484509 it's hard enough as it is out there, so i'm just giving it to you like it is, dear anon! Hope you feel better soon!

No. 484514

My husband and I are about to start the long process of fighting for more custody of his son. Currently, he get the bare minimum supervised visits.. and the mom cuts things short or cancels any chance she gets, then uses short visits against him as “proof” that he doesn’t genuinely want to be in his child’s life. I’ve seen him cry over it, he so desperately wants to have his child around.. but her antics put him on the verge of giving up so frequently. And it’s breaking my heart, not only as his partner but just as a person who struggled to have a relationship with my own dad growing up. Her parents have been together forever, so she just doesn’t understand how important it is to encourage their relationship. I don’t understand why she’s trying to push him away when he’s trying so hard and is genuinely a good dad! My father was a deadbeat but had good intentions so my mom still encouraged him to be around for me (within reason obvs). My husband’s father straight up vanished and it’s hurt him, deeper than he cares to admit to. Just.. FUCK. Going through this sucks. It’s so hard and it literally doesn’t need to be. Just because they didn’t work out as a couple doesn’t mean he’s a shit person. Aggghhhhh

No. 484534

Uhhh OK so I just found out I need about 10 fillings (most tiny). The prices of it where I live now would cost literal thousands, but in my home country it's about 150 dollars. I came here (home country) for a week with the appointment pre booked, only then found out the absolute damage done to my mouth and that it'd take like 3 appointments, and had a filling removed. Now I have an appointment booked that I'll cancel tomorrow, and have to…deal with this tooth without a filling and very slowly get them done.

I'm also kind of shocked about how messy my parents house has become, and how relentlessly dysfunctional they are. Since I've long distanced myself from this home life I'd just like to sit them down and tell them the coping mechanisms they have only aggravate the other. Mom wouldn't be so stressed out if she didn't try and micromanage the business of everybody in the house, and dad needs to start being more self sufficient and putting up solid boundaries so that mom will back off and do less, dad won't get stressed because mom is pestering him and things will be done to his standard, mom won't be stressed because she's juggling many things and also taking heat from dad because he's annoyed that she'll just do his business for him despite him asking otherwise. It's win win win win and I just cannot get through to them at all on anything.

No. 484535

>Stressing yourself out in an attempt gain responsibility for your husbands ex-wives son
Sounds pretty dumb honestly. If you succeed the nasty little goblin will probably repay you by stealing and hoarding your worn clothing.

No. 484543

He needs to go through the proper channels in court to prove the mother is purposefully canceling and switching up plans in order to cut his visits shorter.
If he's not willing to put in the money and effort to win his son, then what's the real purpose of showing tears around you…
And by the way, unless his son is attached to you in some way this isn't your fight. You can be supportive, but I really hope you aren't doing any legwork for his responsibility.

No. 484544

Not to mention why they're supervised visits. Very curious for such a concerned father willing to provide.

No. 484548

I mean I did say we are taking legal action for this, he’s never actually given up on this fight. It’s just disheartening dealing with it to begin with, definitely worthy of tears. He didn’t do anything before now because his living situation couldn’t accommodate a child, but it’s changed since. I haven’t met his son because the mom doesn’t trust me, doesn’t like that I want to be involved in any way (she told us to go have our own kids if I want a kid that bad, missing the point entirely). My only ‘legwork’ is reading up on stuff to make sure we do everything properly and spellchecking lol.

Their divorce was messy, she cheated on him multiple times and wouldn’t go to couples therapy despite him pushing for it. Her family doesn’t know this and her mom encouraged supervised visits (also made her get child support taken out of his paychecks, despite always paying early and occasionally extra) because she explained everything without ever mentioning the real reason they were splitting up. Of course he seemed crazy lmao. He was a stay at home dad when his son was an infant and that worked out really well for them, plus we babysit for my family occasionally.. so from what I’ve seen, I wouldn’t be worried about him alone with a child. I was wary of the fact that they were supervised in the beginning too and wondered if marriage would make him show me a side of him that was alarming.. but nope, nothing.

No. 484549

i'm sorry you guys have to go through this, and i feel especially sorry for the kid put in the middle of all of this. broken homes are no fun especially if dad wants to be involved. but i do feel the need to say that a judge wouldn't grant supervised visits just because grandma 'encouraged' them. the courts don't make those kinds of decisions unless there's a reason. has he ever explained the reason to you? just because he seems good with kids doesn't mean there's not more to the story that you don't know about. it doesn't sound to me like he's disclosed everything tbh, but you know him better than i do obvi. just make sure you know fully what you've gotten yourself into, anon.

No. 484553

>his living situation couldn’t accommodate a child, but it’s changed since
Well hopefully he can prove that it is.
>I haven't met his son, the mother doesn't trust me
Put yourself in her shoes: Would you want your son to become involved and possibly confused with an ex partner's girlfriend? When that ex hasn't even proven that he's fixed up his own living situation yet?
I'd be watching out for my kid too. This is reasonable and it's not an attack against your character so don't take it that way.
>she cheated on him multiple times and wouldn't go to couple's therapy
This is a he-said she-said. How do you know this for a fact? How do you know he's not the cheater?
>her family doesn't know this
>made her get child support taken from his paychecks
This is standard and only a retard wouldn't do it. If he was paying early and extra on his own then this should have been a non-issue for him…yet he's complaining.
>he was a stay at home dad while his son was an infant
Yikes. Unemployed while making the baby mama work, and she had time to cheat on top of all this? Or did he?

I think you're being sold on a tall tale anon.
I think your involvement, while good intentioned, is inappropriate and any decent man would have been ashamed to have gotten you involved to this degree.
You're free to think and support what you want, but I see a lot of bullshit in this. I really do.

No. 484554

i can't believe democrats are going to fuck themselves over by electing warren as the nominee. I hate how liberals always have to take the fucking high road and be so moral, we are going to end up with 4 more years of trump bc ~no pac money~ and ~reparations for blacks~

No. 484570

Agree. My bf has a kid and he'll get upset over how he states the mother is, but he also doesn't go out of his way for his son or anything. My dad left my family when I was wee and I've got the normal daddy issues, so it really breaks my heart to see a dad not really giving a fuck. The mother of his son he says she cancels and messes plans up but I've known he's cancelled or not got replied back to the mother in good enough time. He has a good paying job and sometimes gets on even at me that he's the only human in the planet with a stressful job and office hours lol.

I've felt bad that the mother didn't let his son see his dad because of him dating but they were never together and he moved out before his son was 6 months.

I'll snap at my bf sometimes and bitch him out if he's making rude comments against the mum. My own mum always encouraged us to see my dad and I remember my brother use to be a dick and refuse to see my dad. I remember a few times I cancelled or told my mum I was suck because kids are sensitive and sometimes it'd be too overwhelming for me to see my dad so I think that's also something to consider, does the kid feel comfortable to see his dad? I know it's tough and it's hard to know boundaries when you don't live with a kid.

Honestly if a man has a good wage and just pays the bare minimum court ordered child payments I don't think they can dictate to the actual mother the schedule which is what I've witnessed from my bf. We've been together a few years and the ball has always been in his court. He even told me he has missed payments to his son and felt bad, but the week before he had been out partying etc.

If anons bf can prove the mother is intentionally fucking over the kids relationship I hope it works out for everyone but it's not the other women's battle. I think the most respectful thing to do is just be mindful of the parent that lives the day to day with the kid.

No. 484571

This male asmr artist I used to follow started doing fucking ddlg role plays. It really changed how I feel about him and I'm fucking disgusted. People who are into that shit should be ashamed of themselves.

No. 484574

My husband asked me if I wanted to host another big family Christmas this year and my answer was FUCK NO

No. 484575

>>484554 america is fucked and even though i love judging you all from my leftist bubble all the way from europe but…for fucks sake, how the fuck can't you all get rid of trump?

No. 484577

Can we hold the retards who'd vote for Trump again accountable instead of acting like it's the rest of the country's onus to provide the most agreeable candidate for everyone when that's never going to happen?

Quit voting for that fucker.

No. 484579

File: 1574119266473.jpg (177.24 KB, 1242x1236, smilethroughthepain.jpg)

This is superficial and really not a big problem, but just a super big blow to my self esteem.
My cousin just got a really modeling gig for a really big fashion brand. My brother has modeled too. I hate being the ugly one in the family, I feel like I'm treated worse because of it.
I'm working on losing weight and toning up though, helpfully that will make it better.

No. 484580

Europe is exponentially more fucked than America, maybe euros should worry about their issues rather than being smug about a superpower than in every instance is doing much better than them.

No. 484581

Correct answer.

No. 484582

Just me but if I couldn't compete with looks then I'd try to accomplish things in the education or career paths. Make your own path anon, you can do it!

No. 484583

Oof too much to unpack here. I’ve seen the screenshots of her cheating, it was with people she knew through work (not coworkers, but same building). He even had messaged the wife of one of the men she was seeing to let her know about it, which the wife said he had done it before (also screenshots). He chose not to let her family know, just to minimize drama. Her job also could drop her if it got out that she did it because it’s a fairly public position. Her job paid her more but even with two incomes, they couldn’t afford childcare hence him staying home for a little while.

He moved back into his parents house after their divorce and his family smokes inside, not child appropriate. Now we live on our own, with extra space, so we can have his son here.

I understand that she doesn’t want me around, but it’s totally normal for people to have two households they bounce between with dad/stepmom and mom/stepdad. I haven’t spoken to her more than pleasantries, so besides him asking when he can bring me to visits (which was twice, in the last year).. she’s not totally aware of how supportive I am of his efforts. Just doesn’t like me by default.

He didn’t complain about the wage garnishing either, he just didn’t understand why it was so necessary. He still pays more than their legal agreement, simply because she asked for more. There was no hesitation on his end.

No. 484588

It's one side of the story and you don't have hers, and it sounds like she's not keen on talking to you anytime soon. It's still wise to take that situation with a grain of salt.

Anyway, so what's his employment situation like now? What if you indeed want to have children with him, but with child support needing to be paid, run into the same financial shortcomings as his first relationship? Would you be willing to take on burdens like him wanting you to work full time while he stays at home?

>he just didn’t understand why it was so necessary

Because men tend to slip and miss payments if they're not mandated by law, and maybe what you said about the cheating made her think he might get petty as revenge. Who really knows, but that's the reason.

No. 484589

My dad was a high up in a company where him and my mum met. When she had kids he was making good money that she left and he had an affair with the secretary. Everyone knew. I find it weird that apparently an affair between not Coworkers would impact someone's job. Is she a politician or some shit even then I doubt it would lose her job? And why hide it from her parents? If she's such a bitch and chested why is she being given so much respect and consideration?

Also weird you haven't been introduced to the child and you want joint custody and for them to bounce around houses which is always disruptive I fucking hated it as a kid the only pro I could manage was never doing homework because teachers would feel sorry for being from a broken home but I think that lasted maybe a few months before teachers cracked down on me lol.

I was >>484570 and have had a few meetings with the son but never introduced to the mother. However the mother knows his family and the situations I've met the kid has been where the mother knows its been a family occasion (one instance a wedding) and grandparents were present. Are your husbands parents involved in the kids life?

No. 484592

File: 1574120417230.jpg (100.37 KB, 1280x720, maxresdefault[1].jpg)


No. 484593

He makes what she did when she was the only one working, I work part time and go to school. He’s taken on most our bills lol. In my future career, we could afford childcare when we needed it. But if I made significantly more than him, I would be okay if he stayed home.

She’s a police officer. It’s enough public standing that her personal life could affect her job. She had affairs when she was a dispatcher with cops, then she pursued that as her own career. We’re not asking for joint custody right now, just unsupervised longer visits and alternating holidays. His parents are pretty uninvolved honesty, they’re nice people, just kind of in their own world. They weren’t supportive of him having a kid to begin with so the issues he’s been having are kind of “well you shouldn’t have had a kid!” to them

No. 484594

File: 1574120685951.jpg (102.06 KB, 499x385, vl4eqakfrpr21.jpg)

Similarly to the first time around, I won't vote and I will also be hoping that Trump wins again because FUCK the DNC. I truly don't care anymore if this country burns to the ground with me in it. At this point, we all deserve it.

No. 484595

I get you with the grandparents, honestly my bf has two sisters and you should see his parents dote on his sisters grandkids whereas the few times his son has been invovled in a family gathering is when the elder sister reached out to include him. They had the attitude that their first grandson was a mistake but a happy one. However there is like a clear divide.

Ah being in the police makes more sense sorry for badgering you. Hopefully your husband can start bridging the gap of normal with the visits and you both can have a few holidays together with his kid.

No. 484598

No losers like you deserve it, some people actually have things to fight for like family, their education, their accomplishments, etc. Keep dabbing on liberals while you have shitty healthcare and polluted air and water. I don't even hate Trump, but your POV is childish.

No. 484599

>we all deserve it
Speak for your own damn self lmao. I'm not a fan of what politics has turned into but I'm not dumb enough to give everything to the rich while shooting myself in the foot.

No. 484600

Im not American but I was hoping for a trump win over Hilary. However, I think Trump brought a change to politics. Even look at the mess of where I'm from UK and politics matters more on personalities than issues. I haven't watched one televised thing of BoJo since he was made PM I absolutely refuse to register that man as prime minister in my head I will avoid it at all costs! I think politics is going to massively change in the next 10 years. Or maybe just UK and USA because honestly I am ignorant to other heads of states etc, but there's just so much hysteria around politicians. The upcoming elections in the UK see groups forming coalitions and teaming up, decreasing the actual choice for what citizens can vote on. I'm tired of it all. I've voted every year since I can but this year I've been told the party I actually pay to be a member of will not stand a candidate but will back a party that I am absolutely at odds with. So fuck my vote. And fuck everybody's. Choice is a farce.

No. 484601

Yep. The sooner the DNC burns the sooner another party that isn't infested with communists, stooges, hypocrites, warhawks, and pedos can grow to fill the void.

No. 484604

File: 1574122018220.jpg (15.12 KB, 480x360, hqdefault.jpg)

>call off sick
>the day flies by

>go in to work

>the day drags on

I hate this.

No. 484605

File: 1574122141698.jpg (97.02 KB, 1024x576, 1571267124279.jpg)

No. 484606

>Can we hold more than half of a country with 300 million inhabitants accountable for taking part in a democratic election and not voting for whom I wanted to win?

>muh superpower
>better than europe in every instance

This is why you have trump and deserve him.
They don't notice it and would always deny it, but the average american behaves so similarily to trump - just in less rich lol You're so self-righteous. Always thinking you're better than others, always wanting to fight against others, never just being neutral and accepting of differences like normal adults.
I hate the leader of my country, but I acknowledge that many other people choose her and that she therefore was rightfully elected. No big deal, I just move on, no need to throw tantrums.

No. 484607

fuck, i feel your pain

>goes into first job. day drags on

>goes into second job that i actually love. day rushes by

i want to quit my first job already, but i already cut them down to two days a week

No. 484608

Can someone explain what is so bad about Trump? As someone who doesn't live in the US I don't see how Trump is any worse than Obama or Bush.

No. 484609

File: 1574123019323.jpg (187.92 KB, 960x958, 1571264235319.jpg)

>You're so self-righteous. Always thinking you're better than others
>hur dur from my euro bubble looking at the silly americuns
>wait what, shut up you are the self righteous one reeeee

ok, enjoy your 60% income tax for shitty healthcare and 50 euro pension

No. 484610

>Can we hold more than half of a country with 300 million inhabitants accountable for taking part in a democratic election and not voting for whom I wanted to win?

He didn't win the popular vote. Many Americans didn't vote at all. A chunk of his voterbase only voted for him because "Hilary can't win!" And another chunk regret their decision altogether.
Yeah, I'm holding people who voted for him responsible because there were other options. People have their heads too far up in their ass with identity politics, doing spiteful things just to make the opposing team "lose" even if it means they elect a moron to office.

People are strange.

No. 484611

i really hate politics talk on /ot/ because the state of the world is just so depressing and this board is kind of an escape from daily life (at least for me). but i need to say that the kind of person you described - self-righteous, always looking for a fight, unable to be neutral and accept differences - is the kind of person who screeches about how terrible trump every two seconds and actively and vocally hates everything american. so… you kind of have it backwards there.
>I hate the leader of my country, but I acknowledge that many other people choose her and that she therefore was rightfully elected. No big deal, I just move on, no need to throw tantrums.
and this is what those people will never, ever do.

No. 484618

can you really be 'best friends' with someone after they shut you out emotionally? getting cut off is really getting to me since i put so much into the relationship. we're both emotionally retarded and don't make friends that often so i thought we'd see eye to eye. it was such a stupid reason to rule me out. i feel so much resentment toward her now.

No. 484619

You're so sweet anon, this was super encouraging. That's exactly what I'm trying to do now and working hard on finishing school. I'm just focusing on being happy for her, too, rather than being salty (she deserves it, she works super hard)!

No. 484620

I'm about as conservative as Bernie Sanders. Mostly, I'm sick and fucking tired of being treated like a retard by leftist politicians and non-human by conservatives. That's why I hope our government fails, so it might have a chance to be reborn into something better. The proverbial Phoenix rising from the ashes.

No. 484624

File: 1574126996790.jpg (61.21 KB, 720x960, 1574123584542.jpg)

No. 484630

I'm so tired of being depressed and anxious
I've been on anti depressants for almost a full month and I still cried myself to sleep (to be fair, I couldn't fall asleep and I cried while taking melatonin, but still)

There's just so much of my life that would be improved by me not being depressed and I can't wait to get to that point, but it just seems like no matter what I'll never not be depressed.

No. 484633

For stuff like this, it's always best go go by what you think and not what the other person thinks
If you spend too much time thinking about how they feel, you lose yourself

If you want to be friends with someone, reach out to them and never stop unless they ask you to. If you don't want to be friends, you can just slowly move out of their life.

I know it hurts to be pushed away, and I'm sure there are personal reasons that really have nothing to do with you personally as to why it happens, so if you do want to be friends with someone–just keep an open mind and heart (and ask them to get therapy)

No. 484634

a year ago I had a group of friends (?) well I had a friend I’ll call her Iris for identity protection’s sake and she started hanging out with this group of guys and I didn’t really like them but eh I tagged along with her and the guys and they were pretty nice to me I didn’t really belong with that group but they didn’t hate me and you could tell I was just a tagalong
Pretty soon after she found said male group, we almost never hung out just the two of us without those guys being there… k.. I didn’t really like that but what can you do? Last year I lived with my parents so we moved somewhere for my stepdad’s work temporarily, we move, so sad. As I am in another state, I see Iris on social media living it up with the group. The guys from the group occasionally reach out to me and say “hey we miss you” I’m like aww i guess they were my friends after all
>>ffw 3 months I return, ask to hang out with Iris, she’s always busy and her bf (one of the group guys) doesn’t like her hanging out with me bc he’s a bpd and abandonment issues mommas boy and he’s scared I’ll steal her from him. Whatever.jpg
Iris texted me that she saw me in public somewhere but didn’t approach me or wave at me bc her bf was there and she didn’t wanna make him jelly
I see malegroup in public all the time and they never acknowledge me or wave at me
I don’t exist I guess
I never ask to hang out with them when I first came back into town I tried and failed embarrassingly to orchestrate a eating or mall thing but they were all busy or just ignored me
Now I see them going out to eat and going to movies, going on trips and shit without me it hurts me so badly how they just dropped me like that and how much I missed them (Iris especially) while I was gone and now that I’m here they don’t want me around i miss spending the night with Iris, I even miss tagging along with the group. Them just not acknowledgung me hurts so damn much I didn’t know it would bum me out this much. I met them in my last year of high school I’m done with that and this town is too small to make new friends.

No. 484643

Sometimes I wish that the U.S had mandatory voting like Australia. But then I realize that there is a lot of stupid and uninformed people in America and the thought of them voting scares me. So maybe it’s the best.

No. 484645

File: 1574129557778.png (148.14 KB, 960x480, gtgb4afrfb821.png)

>He didn't win the popular vote.
Why do people keep repeating this like it's relevant at all?
Maybe a system where it counted would be better, or maybe a system where it counted would be worse, but either way it isn't the one that we have, so it isn't the one he played around. For all that anyone knows if the popular vote counted, and he campaigned based on that, and all the silent Republicans in hardcore blue electorates this time bothered to show up, he'd have have won even harder.

No. 484646

>Smug eurofag claims Americans are the smug and and “holier than thou” ones
Kek. Lacking in self awareness I see. Also nothing wrong with not liking the leader of your country and being vocal about it. Yes, some people take your hatred of Trump to far. But your mentality has lead to wars and people being oppressed.

No. 484648

God Bless the Queensland bogans that tick every box at random.

No. 484658

I’m so tired of being on my period and crying over everything. My boyfriend and I fought for two days and I couldn’t stop crying, yesterday I cried after hearing my favorite Grateful Dead song on the radio, and today I’m crying thinking about my boyfriend going out of town for a week to visit his family for thanksgiving. Every thought I have while on my period is just amplified and the only reaction is crying, I’m so sick and tired of just being a whiny, teary mess for almost a quarter of every month. I can’t hide my tears either, and I end up crying in front of my boyfriend, my roomate, my parents, my friends, whoever had the misfortune of being around me. I really feel like I can’t control my thoughts or emotions at all and it’s so tiring.

No. 484659

File: 1574131481059.jpeg (4.01 KB, 120x120, download.jpeg)

>cherrypicking that one thing out of the entire paragraph just to sperg about your 5D chess and a draconian system that for decades political scientists have said needed reformation
>and thinking this is a gotcha

If this is the hill you want to die on anon, I don't care.

No. 484663

my friend keeps bailing on me and i am so sad. i am also paranoid that she is doing it to prove a point because i was so flakey last year when i was dealing with mental illness stuff. she is still nice and friendly on her texts so i am probably reading too much into it lol

No. 484667


representative democracy is of the reasons the US is not another latin american failed state right now.

>political scientists have said needed reformation

you do realize how dumb this statement sounds? reddit tier, absolute seething.

No. 484669

It's not a gotcha. It's just something that I wanted to vent on. It's a vent thread, after all. I do also believe that a direct democracy tyranny of the majority where minorities are always sidelined by design would be even more of a Draconian system, but yeah, w/e, this isn't the place to sperg on it.

No. 484670

My bf is bad at talking and I can't remember the last time we had an interesting, engaging conversation. A lot of the times I end up going to my best girl friend to have a fun conversation and we can easily talk for 8 hours straight. She makes it interesting and I think we're both really good at listening to each other. She can sperg about video games (which I'm not super into) and still make it engaging.

Meanwhile my bf never really goes into depth or give specific examples when he talks, and when I try to, he doesn't have any meaningful contribution or doesn't know how to keep the convo going. I mean I'm introverted and am not a huge talker but at least once in a while I want to have nice conversations with him. Oh well.

No. 484672

Yeah, we should ignore educated people on the subject and listen to internet denizens like you. That's the true non-seethe way.

Fair enough.

No. 484675

>we should listen to biased zealots, as long as they agree with me and is convenient for my political side of the spectrum, not otherwise

yeah sure, the same ones who think we should give subsidized hormones to kids and see Cuba as a shining example of freedom? no thanks, weak appeal to authority and emotional arguments only work on brainlets, thank god for the electoral college.

No. 484678

Lol whatever you say anon.

No. 484686

I've been helping my coworker with a big project and she's being an ungrateful asshole about it. This project isn't my job, and I have my own deadlines to reach, but I know she's busy and I genuinely wanted to help by easing her workload. This project isn't difficult, but time consuming, and I'm now handling 90% of it. All she's given me is snide comments that I'm not working fast enough, or criticized minor details that no one else would notice. I don't get why it's hard to not be an entitled piece of shit to someone who's actively making your day easier.

No. 484689

Wow, fuuuuuuuuuck her. Too bad it's such a fine line to keep the peace.

No. 484694

File: 1574136737230.png (211.94 KB, 1702x1142, Screen Shot 2019-11-18 at 11.0…)


I know you struggle to bang your last two brain cells together to form a sentence but there are people whose lives and wellbeing actually depend on who is president. You're not being treated like a retard just by leftist politicians, you actually are fucking retarded. The government is never going to fail you absolute turkey. Republicans are just going to keep winning and fuck over poor people/nonwhites/women/anyone who isn't a rich old white dude.

One of the main reasons Trump won was that he appealed to a sizable demographic of white blue collar workers, farmers, and agriculture workers who typically don't vote. This demographic is what won him key states like PA. Unless Democrats actually get their shit together, stop being butthurt bc Bernie isn't the nominee, and vote for whoever is the nominee, Trump will absolutely win again. Honestly I think Biden would be the most likely to be able to win because he has a lot of appeal to black voters and moderates, probably two of the most important demographics - but then you have the Bernie bros who aren't actually affected by any of Trump's policies because they're either 19 year olds whose parents pay for everything or white 30 year old men who protest vote or vote for Trump bc ~fuck the establishment~

We don't need the perfect candidate. We need someone who 1. can beat Trump and 2. actually govern

No. 484695

Whenever I remember there's a prolife club on my college campus I feel so disturbed. I don't know the exact membership but knowing women my age who are educated/this privileged don't believe in abortion as a right just scares me. They had flyers out for a prolife movie showing and I threw one into a recycling bin.

No. 484697

No one ever denied that Trump won because he appealed to hicks and blue collars.
The problem is that almost half of Americans didn't bother to vote.
>Unless Democrats actually get their shit together, stop being butthurt bc Bernie isn't the nominee.
Terrible strawman.
Oh, and Biden is awful.

No. 484698

or we're leftists that are tired of getting screwed over, this is why its important to vote in the primaries and vote for the most far left candidate. I DO want policies that help the poor and working class, I DON'T want to keep avoiding going to the doctor because I can't afford it. I'm tired of the bernie bro shit, I'm a woman that benefits more from bernies policies than any female dnc candidate.

No. 484700

Doesn't your campus have a women's association or at least a gender studies department that would be upset about this?

No. 484704

i'm pro-choice as well, but people like you who get offended at the mere idea of someone having different beliefs from you and actually look for ways to shut down their dialogue like a child throwing a tantrum are ridiculous. grow the fuck up - not everyone is going to think the way you think and that's just how the world works.

No. 484707

Someone having a different belief and choosing not to practice abortion if the situation befalls them is completely fine.

Fostering a movement that has wrought tangible setback (to a throughly tested right) that is fundamentally rooted in emotion and not fact, does not belong in an educational institution.

A community church group is more appropriate.

No. 484722

I'm so fucking annoyed right now.

I'm not currently a student but I have a uni ID and I come to my uni library to use their internet. the library is open to everyone til 8pm, after that it's only open to students. if you're a student you can scan your card at the door to get in, but my card doesn't work (because I'm not actually a student) so I get here before 8, and when they look at my ID they don't actually check if I'm a student or not.

anyway I got here at like 7:45 and I don't have my laptop charger, my battery as 70% but it has shitty battery life even on battery saving mode.

I'm so fucking annoyed at myself for not just double checking if my charger was in the bag. fuck this is so annoying.

No. 484754

As a poorfag, there are no policies or politicians that are going to help us, the only thing that's gonna happen are we"re going to be taxed more. A couple cents is A LOT for us. None of the candidates, even the most left, want to listen to us, they'd rather listen to someone in the upper middle class with no background of being poor and what their assumptions are of what we want from politicians, which is always something entirely skewed. They can promise to help us, even speak to crowds of us, but it's a literal wall they're speaking to, but nothing we say back will be heard unless we start magically making $78k a year. The working class and lower is an afterthought for politicians because it doesn't benefit them in the slightest.

No. 484770

Is it wrong of me to be uncomfortable with my boyfriend being friends with ALL his Exs? and sometimes talking about sex with them and what they liked? I was a former sexworker and I mentioned it once for info ofc but I'd never dream of bringing up who I've been with, even my Exs aside from my super abusive one that I talk about a bit WHO I'M NOT FRIENDS WITH, only because venting… I never talk to any my es and these are people he was with for years

No. 484771

Why does that bother you?
If he's not prioritising them over you it should be fine?

No. 484773

I don't care what the woke, open minded people say. I think it's weird to stay friends with your exes. I'm glad the issue has never come up before and tbh I wouldn't know what to do if I encountered a bf who kept this exes. I mean, when I break up I cut the ex off as soon as ends are tied up, as it just extends being hung up on them. It hurts, as a breakup would, but after that there's no messiness.

No. 484776

Not if you believe it's murder. Murder isn't something that anyone has a right to. As triggered and disgusted as you are by them existing there's a good chance they currently think even less of you. Fortunately all of are attending a school that exists to help people think, and as it happens part of that is the ability to debate. So have an honest discussion with them and find some common ground.

No. 484777


No it absolutely isn't wrong, it's weird as hell to cling to one's exes like that. They're exes for a reason. It's like keeping some spare hoes around just in case one breaks up with their current partner.

No. 484783

I can't really describe it, I guess I'm insecure and I worry he dreams about his exs still, thinking they might be better at something than me? especially… sex, anything. I have major trauma and thus was a sexworker for years, warping my views. I just think that he thinks his exs are still a… sexy thing. I dunno. Something about it makes me uncomfortable

No. 484784

As I get older I'm less jealous over partners that stay friends with exes and I find it more concerning when guys don't speak (or are on bad terms with) every single one of their exes

Depends on the guy, but it can be a sign that he actually values women

No. 484785

tbh if you think it's weird to be friends with exes then you probably have a history of shit relationships that always end on very bad terms. (typed this before reading beyond your first sentance lol)

No. 484786


You are absolutely right in feeling uncomfortable. Talking about sex with exes, people he used to fuck, that's borderline emotional cheating. It's not normal to be that close with exes. His sex life is no longer any of their business and their sex life is no longer any of his business. It's not even about insecurity or whatever scrot excuses there might be to keep your ex-women around, it's just common courtesy.

No. 484787

This. One of the biggest red flags when dating a guy is if he passionately hates all his exes or describes them all as bitches

This guy is showing he's not the type to get abusive and then cut them off

No. 484789


Sure, hating your exes is one thing, but being so close you talk about sex stuff etc. is way too much… it's ok to be civil with your exes but you have issues if you can't move on from them, if you still actively seek to befriend them and hang out with them while you're in a relationship. It's a bit disrespectful to your partner.

No. 484792

I don’t know how to tell one of my friends her attitude is pure trash. She’s always whining and crying about being incapable of meeting new friends and how difficult is to be understood by other people but actually she’s really mean without intending to.
When she gives her opinions about something she does it in a very harsh way, not accepting other’s people opinion and when you try to discuss with her, she always makes snarky comments which can leave you speechless.
She’s very stubborn and I can tell why people who recently met her can think she’s a very rude girl just by the looks she gives. I want to tell her that maybe she can try and be more subtle or understanding but I know her and I’m so sure she’ll get pissy and defensive…

No. 484795

Set clear boundaries if he's oversharing personal info related to you but it's controlling behavior if you expect a partner to just cut off multiple friendships or never hang with them again

No. 484798

You can move on and still be friends tho

No. 484830

>Not if you believe it's murder
It's not, sounds like a personal problem.

No. 484833

I'm not gonna derail by arguing here. You should argue it with them the next time that you see them. Worst case scenario where they don't budge an inch you'll have improved your ability to negotiate in the future.

No. 484839

Yesterday I had to take a potential client golfing with my boss which I was not excited for but when we got there they didn’t even let me golf and made me drive the golf cart, like what am I a fucking secretary. I thought about saying something to my boss but he’s sexist af so in retrospect I should have expected it. It was honestly humiliating

No. 484840

i hate how my boyfriend is so pragmatic and bad at feelings sometimes.
I wanted him to reassure me that everything is going to be okay, but he said that since he's not a seer he can't be sure about that. I explained to him that since he controls his own actions it's like a promise to do his best to support me, and also a self-fulfilling prophecy, as saying that puts me in a good disposition that helps me do my own best and have more chances at succeeding.
after a long moment of explaining that he understood and said it to me, but it makes me feel lonely that I always have to be the one to be optimistic and cheer him up and that I have to pry something so simple out of his mouth. when I make a mistake he has so little awareness and so little trust in me that he becomes really pessimistic, which makes me feel like shit.

at least he said it though.

No. 484841

My mom is shitting me for buying a 10$ video game while my brother is wasting all his money buying nothing but trash food and vodka. I feel like I am 13 again.

I think that me being an adult means nothing to her.

No. 484850

I'm not OP.

No. 484851

Not really a vent but I just broke up with my bf of 6 years. We're still friends, it was a mutual decision and I do believe it was the right one for the both of us but I feel sad and scared about my future anyway. Idk if I'll ever find anyone who'll love and understand me the way he used to. I need a shoulder to cry on but my best friend is on a vacation in another country and ughh this sucks. I thought breaking up was going to make me feel better but I feel just as shitty as I did earlier.

No. 484854

i am so sorry. sometimes the right decision is the toughest one to go through, so good on you for doing what's best. I hope you can heal and find someone who understands you even better.

No. 484863

You will find someone to love and understand you better than he did.

No. 484864

Classic MTA subway made me 20 minutes late to work because of a police investigation so my train was stuck at a station. Actually, if I had left late then I would’ve gotten on a later train that was put on the express track to bypass where I was stuck and I would’ve been on time/early. Then when I got to work, they banned me from my desk because theyre doing construction on the stairs right behind it so I had to fuck off to some random desk where the computer wasn’t hooked up correctly so the screen didn’t work and the internet isn’t connected on it either. I tried to bring the laptop I usually use because I found an ethernet cable but they took out the battery pack so it always has to be plugged in, but when I went to grab the charger it was GLUED TO THE BOTTOM OF THE DESK I’M USUALLY AT.

It’s not even 10am and I’m fucking miserable.

No. 484910

I gave myself a week off to relax and work on personal projects and instead, I'm doing nothing productive. I've been browsing stupid sites, shitposting on so many imageboards, I'm surprised no one's banned me yet, and I've been eating like a pig. oink oink

While when I'm working, even with my limited free time, I get so much shit done. Maybe I just need to practice self control? idk, I hate myself.

No. 484959

i sometimes wonder if i'm such an anxious person who always seeks validation has to do with the fact that my dad had severe anger issues and liked to let it out on my mum and me, and my mum was the stereotypical submissive housewife who endured everything because she felt like that was best thing to do, or because she didn't know better, and had no one else to rely on if she even considered leaving him.
whatever it is,i wish i could stop obsessing and getting anxious over things that are so fucking trivial to normal people.
Doesn't help that i also have ocd…

No. 484972

I'm the original anon and I didn't even seriously consider going to their event tbh, I go to a STEM focused school on the smaller side and I myself don't have a lot of knowledge/debate skills. Plus I'm kind of an autist and don't want to make a fucking fool of myself. Hence why I made the post here instead.

I figured my vent might get a few responses but lol. I mentioned throwing the flyer away because it was kind of pathetic and in a place I don't think anyone would have noticed.

No. 484974

Finally back to my desk and my arm kept feeling irritated so I wiped it down a few times and it was so fucking dirty. Fuck. I was telling my coworker and she said it was probably bits of fiberglass, which makes sense. It feels like I'm having needles poke and it felt like grains of some shit when I wiped my finger across my desk but at least now its clean ugh.

No. 484983

Ugh. I’m getting annoyed of black and/or LGBT twitter users sucking each other off and having a superiority complex over anyone that isn’t them. I know I shouldn’t care what some assholes on the internet say, but as someone who used Twitter at least once a day, these assholes are insufferable.

Social media was a mistake.

No. 485018

I’m angry all the time because I’m almost 30 and I still rely on my toxic family. I was playing a video earlier today and it was super hard and it made me frustrated and me being frustrated caused made me think about all the fucked up shit that my family has done recently. I had to stop because I was scared of myself if I got even more angry.

I don’t want to be like this. But every fucking day kills me a little bit more.

No. 485019

if being dependent on your family at your age makes you angry, why not just… be independent? there's a pretty simple solution if you don't like living with your parents: move out.

No. 485020

>screeching boomer stepdad constantly bitching about the electric bill we split for the apartment
>it's really average but he thinks it's super high bc old people just gotta bitch
>in southern summer am forced to endure sweltering 80 degree apartment because he won't let me keep the air on in low 70s
>southern weather finally cools
>think about how we can shut the air off completely hence lower the bill and hence I don't have to be fucking hot anymore
>thermostat dips below 70 but not past 65
>enjoying myself, walking around comfortably in a camisole and boyshorts
>can actually cuddle into my comforter at night and be a cozy temp
>stepdad stomps around in a sweater hoodie and pants and fleece socks
I feel like yelling at him to go to the fucking doctor. I'm so sick of him freaking out at reasonable temperatures because there's something wrong with his body temp. I thought he wanted to save some fucking money but I guess not if he wants to blast the air past 80 degrees again. Asshole.

No. 485025

In the process of moving out (meeting with a case manager tomorrow) but saving up money still takes time plus I need money to pay for my classes.

Basically everything is taking awhile and I hate waiting.

No. 485028

Not being mean or whatever but if you're over the age of 21 and still act like a teenager towards your family you are not stable enough to live alone. Well you can but you'll be like Luna (Slater)

No. 485030

Perhaps. But sometimes the only way to learn how to live on your own like an adult is to actually do it. Living with your parents until you “get” it isn’t realistic especially if your parents enable you to hell and back.

No. 485034

Decided on making a cross stitch portrait of friend’s kitty as a Christmas gift bc she really loves her kitty also she’s very old and may pass soon. But now i’m starting to second-guess myself whether getting something hand-made is lame or not. She's also into drawing so i think she could appreciate it but i have never gotten her anything handmade before. Already made pixel art to base the cross stitch of off and I personally think it's a cute concept but ahh.

Is it a lame gift?

No. 485039

That sounds like a cute gift and I would personally really appreciate it if I got something like that

No. 485044

Agree, I made sacrifices to escape my family. My situation was more my parents disabling me instead of enabling so the incentive to leave was really strong for years.

They tried their best to burden me financially and make me feel like I couldn't be independent unless I was going to college full time and simultaneously had a full time job that paid at least $14/hr. I ultimately became poorer living under my parent's roof because they increasingly "borrowed" money from me and made me pay for things I had no need for, like the $250 TV bill and my grandfather's & sister's phone bill on top of my own, which left my mom and dad to pay for their own phones.
I was making $10/hr working at a restaurant, where my paychecks fluctuated between $60 - $250 a week. Imagine your parents demanding you give over $400 a month for nonsense with that kind of job, on top of them asking you literally every other day if you were going to apply for college classes.
I initially escaped my parents house working that restaurant job. It was tough at first, but I did it. At my new place, I lived in a room. I bought my own used car, paid my own insurance, no TV needed, or phone bills that weren't mine. Just had to pay for myself and quickly realized how much money was just going down the drain living with my parents. I eventually found a nice full time job within a few weeks that paid $11/hr where my paychecks were a constant $380 every week. I moved in with my boyfriend shortly afterwards, where I was lucky enough to save even more.
I left my parents not getting a lot of things, but I knew it was the best choice I could make. My mental health improved so much, I stopped having to go to therapy about a year and a half after leaving my parents house.
I honestly thought, upon escaping, I was going to end up like those people on Tumblr and Twitter who would have to e-beg every day because bills and rent were going to be abysmal. It ended up being the opposite for me, the only help I received was a friend giving me $30 for gas money after buying my used car. Everything else I was about to handle, to my surprise. One thing I ultimately learned, which I regret not doing earlier, cut all ties to your parents names. If anything you have is under their name, leave it with them because they might try to threaten you with legal action down the road. Other than that, good luck and you'll be fine.
Didn't mean to reply to this with a story but oh well lol

No. 485055

I haven’t worn my body brace for my scoliosis in years. I stopped wearing it when I started dorming in college because the sound of the velcro being ripped open was loud and I was afraid of waking my rando roommates so I just stopped wearing it. On occasion I try to get back into wearing it regularly but adjusting to it is difficult. Tonight I put it on again and I can barely tighten the velcro halfway what I used to be able to do… like it barely makes it out of the loops on the other side to bend over itself (so the velcro wont even stay since theres so little for it to grab onto). I don’t know if its from my spine/entire ribcage shifting in a way that the brace can’t fit me like it used to, or if it’s weight gain, but either way it’s making me feel fucking awful- for potential weight gain, for potentially having my back be more fucked up, and for not wearing it regularly all these years like I used to. Fuck.

No. 485071

File: 1574219611208.jpeg (67.28 KB, 602x424, BC49D914-FCE7-4DDF-B37A-114489…)

I’m so, so tired in the morning. It doesn’t seem to matter what time I go to sleep at, I always have dark under eyes and am in a constant state of sleepiness.

No. 485078

having a hard time dealing with the fact that childhood depression and super dysfunctional families are foreign concepts to some people. I used to only feel comfortable interacting with other depressed losers, that I think it's warped my perspective a bit. MOST people are normies with neutral to happy childhood experiences and do not understand what goes on in depressed losers' heads. like I don't even have a happiest memory or moment, and the….clueless positivity some people exude is a lot to deal with. it's almost like being back in grade school when all the other kids are excited about the magic of Christmas and all you have to look forward to is spending more time around a family that hates you.

No. 485079

samefag, I'm not depressed anymore and I'm trying to be apart of normie society now. I just can't shake it off… that was my whole childhood and teen years. I used to not understand how people could miss the signs of depression until someone an heroed, but these people project their positive memories so hard they're literally blind to the subtle and unsuble ways people suffer.

No. 485187

I have been dealing with increasingly frequent flashbacks and realizations about things that happened to me when I was a teenager the last few weeks. I was sexually manipulated, physically abused, groomed, emotionally isolated and encouraged to hurt myself by multiple older men when I was 15 and alone, and had nobody to help me. The first man was 15 years older than me. I somehow never thought any of what happened to me was weird or abnormal until this last month, 12 years later. It has gotten to the point where I cannot sleep because every time I sleep my nightmares get worse and worse. Somehow I feel as though if I were to tell anyone all these horrible things that happened, it would be a burden to them to know it. I can’t really explain why I care about burdening family members with the knowledge of what their own neglect of me caused to happen, but somehow I am. I don’t know who to talk to or how to feel better about it and mostly I have been cycling between depressive exhaustion and straight up not wanting to live with the pain these things have caused me. I don’t know what will help make it better, I don’t know if talking to people will actually help, and I don’t really know how to keep living life like this. Still, I somehow have the energy to keep worrying about making other people sad or uncomfortable.

No. 485199

Not sure If the right thread but my dads fucking gross. Basically I discovered tonight that everytime my mom doesnt have sex with him he Beats off and cums on the floor leaving it here for her to clean. Hes done more abusive shit and I just wish my mim got tf out shes too good for him.

No. 485214

Get your iron levels checked. Take b12 supplements.

No. 485216

Just know you got through the last 12 years despite this happening to you, so you can keep going.

You're right that your families' neglect was what caused it (and the predation of those sick fucks) and it was not your fault

When I start getting into "whoops remembering awful stuff" territory I reject those thoughts and keep doing what I'm doing in the present. Look after your health and safety and these things won't happen again.

He sounds really gross, I hope your mom gets a divorce asap

What a manipulative creep.

No. 485222

Thank u anon for your feedback! Bit the bullet just now by buying threads so she better like it haha

No. 485225

I can’t seem to get accepted for an apprenticeship because I have no past experience BUT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET EXPERIENCE IF NO ONE WANTS TO HIRE ME IN THE FIRST PLACE UGHHHHHHHH

No. 485227

Every time I scroll by the art thread on /ot/ and the posts that are visible I really wonder about the mental health of anons who post in it.

No. 485230

Had an item delivered by courier today, signed for it and said thanks, his reply

"good girl"

Is it just me or is that strange considering I'm a woman in my thirties? I honestly wanted to smack the fat fuck

No. 485231

his pornsick brain made him say that lmfao. creepy af

No. 485237

here she comes again…it would be nice not having to explain myself at this point every. single. time.

No. 485252

I have this internet friend I message, but they know that I really don’t like being on social media a lot of the time, so I’m not on often. But on the occasion that I do post something on tumblr/twitter/instagram/whatever, literally within 0.3 seconds they have liked and commented on it, and then they immediately text me wanting to talk for hours. They get upset when I ignore them because to me, just because I’ve posted something isn’t an invitation that I have time to chat + they KNOW I don’t like being online a lot. It just weirds me out that they obviously have it that the second I post anything, they get notified about it - either that or they’re on all their social media’s at one 24/7 (they live on an opposite time zone to me)..They’re really nice but it feels obsessive at times, and I’m introverted af as it is so I don’t want a clingy friend who constantly wants to fly over to meet me. Like fuck off! It actually puts me off posting anything as I know they’ll be on my back the next second wanting my attention.

No. 485257

File: 1574267417419.jpeg (191.84 KB, 750x953, 83A600CF-68C9-4958-99DC-3719D5…)

okay for the sake of being progressive or just when you have to use the bathroom I don’t care what bathroom you use. I don’t, it’s a function and we all do it no matter who or what you are. what gets me here is that this is, a 100% gay male. no crazy pronouns no special taglines. BEING A GAY MALE DOES NOT MAKE YOU A WOMAN or give you access to female spaces?

You're literally a man in a women’s restroom. You have a full beard are not “female presenting.” You’re completely enforcing the stereotype of “haha gay men and women amirite” and your outfit looks like some sort of burger joint uniform. Why even be in there in the first place besides the quirky caption and perhaps a slightly better background?

it’s a personal cow I needed to needed to vent where someone would maybe understand.

No. 485258

What the fuck?? That's some serial killer shit. What a disturbing man. I hope your mom frees herself one day anon.

No. 485261

I hate men

No. 485264

the fact that he felt the need to point out he's in the ladies' room just gives off giant "lol fuck women" shit-stirring vibes. it's like he wants a woman to get mad at him so he can clap back. it's not even one of those nice women's bathrooms with a full-length mirror lmfao no excuse.

this is pink-pill territory though so be careful anon. i guess.

No. 485274

File: 1574270452359.gif (980.88 KB, 342x239, 1366338899355.gif)

I really worry about and hate that other than gender-, sexuality-, race-, political spectrum and now age related fights between people keep getting more vicious and vocal. But at the same time..


No. 485275


No. 485285

what… is happening in two months?

No. 485295

I can't tell if this is about the new youtube rules coming into practice in January?

No. 485297


Completely unrelated but I fucking hate Rick in the walking dead. HATE HIM. Fucking cocksure, hypocritical, over aggressive piece of shit throughout and I was so thrown off when I looked up the subreddit and he was adored for some reason.

Is there some deeper reason I'm too stupid to get as to why this violent moron is beloved?

I mean I love a good antihero and grey morality characters but I really thought the show was challenging us by having a truly hated main character.

No. 485298


i think its flash being discoutinued

No. 485301

I'm starting to dislike gay men more and more every day, they are no better than heterosexual men. they don't even try to hide their hatred for women and I hate how they coopt every fucking female space and are praised and encouraged because they are so brave

No. 485302

it's most likely about flash dying, but what anon is getting wrong is that it's not boomers killing it, its the fact that tech is getting too advanced that older software is becoming more obsolete and difficult to run.

No. 485307

What anons said, Google doing shady shit, fucking up and creating an opportunity for corporations to try and squeeze even more money out of yt creators that will probably ultimately make them delete their channels or making their videos invisible and unsearchble starting on January 1st, and a shit ton of "smaller" (aka not net giant) websites and blogging platforms closing down probably due to flash around the same date. In my case I'm upset about drawr.net closing down and nuking a decade worth of animu tutorials on 2nd December, yaplog (japanese blogging platform) closing down and thus erasing half of j-fashion history in 31th January and more and more entries in The Wayback Machine mysteriously vanishing, especially related to livejournal and that downloading whole websites gets harder due to google's fucking robot.txt cancer.

No. 485309

Samefag but also obviously a shit ton of creative content, whole websites and games dying do to the flash thing and archive websites not picking it up properly.

No. 485311

This person 100% wants to get in your pants and needs to back the fuck off

No. 485312

There was not a single likeble character in TwD imo. That and the plot that got stale made me drop it after the governor storyline reached its peak.

No. 485336

I don't want to be friends with mentally ill people anymore. They drain you off all your energy then leave only to come back after weeks to start it all over. They really drag you down with them.

No. 485337

The artist salt thread?

No. 485343

I'm visiting my parents and spent hours cleaning up the bathroom today. All available space was taken up by toiletries, stuff that I know had been there, same position, for 5+ years, when I left home. All those hours were spent getting rid of stacks of dusty, moldy or stale shit, didn't even do more than dust. Massive bag of toiletries to be binned and honestly? Doesn't look much different. I've made a dent, but it's not enough. It's like they can't just buy shampoo, it has to be 4 bottles, all opened at once with another 4 half done rotting in a corner.

I keep trying to have a heart to heart with my mom about the fact that she needs to stop buying new shit because it's "such a good deal". And only afterwards seeing there's no space, so piling it up while trying to find someone to "gift" it to. Whenever I've tried to clean up in the past they'd freak out and conjure up some bs reason as to why it's useful to them despite them not touching it in probably a decade.

I'm a bit worried because as the years go by the old shit doesn't go, but the new shit just stacks on top of it. I can only see this behaviour getting worse, and tbh I feel all I can do is try and get one room to a decent state every time i'm over, IF they allow me to. What's sad is that my little brother seems to have given up. He used to get annoyed at all the mess, but now his room is awful and for the first time he didn't want to help when I asked to clean.

And idk, it's just stressful. It's stressful always trying to find a place to sit, or to put your plate or cup without knocking something over, or putting everything on the bed so you can move around, you know?

No. 485347

I liked him alright because a) he gets dealt such a shitty hand at the beginning of the show it's hard not to think "welp he's holding up better than I would have, I guess", and b) he's a prick but less of one than every other character which makes him look better in comparison.

No. 485352

My mom does the same thing. I don’t know if it was because she grew up in a poor family but she always buys stuff because it’s on clearance and holds onto things for way too long. I used to toss the almost empty shampoo/conditioner bottles or lotion in the trash and then she would pluck them out again. And I started buying bulk hand soap so she would stop putting water in almost empty soap containers.

One day when she wasn’t at home I threw out a ton of old hair brushes and donated the old hairdryer and some unopened lotions/sprays that had been in the closet for years. I never told her and I don’t even know if she noticed.

No. 485362

Shit, we are siblings aren't we? That's my mom.

No. 485375

I’m in a similar position. Out here trying to be a more functioning adult as well.

No. 485376

My shitty fucking husband has been home all fucking day drinking beer. Go to work for five hours. Come back, still drunk. Dogs have shit in the basement because he couldn’t have bothered to not let them out. Didn’t clean it up either because it smelled bad. Said it’s not his fault it’s the dogs fault. Like no. You didn’t let them out. The shit is still down there. Im not going to clean it either. I’m tired of cleaning up his fucking messes. I’m fucking tired. They’re his dogs too. Idc if he works nights. He was up fucking drinking all day and all fucking night. I’m tired.
Do yourself a favor and never ever ever fucking marry an alcoholic.

No. 485387

File: 1574290201350.jpg (40.66 KB, 500x480, n5xuvgi7pm331.jpg)

My parents have passed and my house has been destroyed by water damage. I'm living out of hotels right now by the insurance without a job. I quit it before I knew all this would happen but I did hate that workplace.

I'm honestly so damn alone and depressed right now. Almost just tried to end it on friday after hours of crying. My friends aren't taking this situation seriously and one has been mopping to me about their life. This person has a good income with loving, living family, and their own place. I'm at a loss for words how I'm supposed to care for them on top of this disaster.

No. 485392

I feel so alone. I hate that I can’t have a therapist. Or even a friend. I’m socially isolated because I’m in a foreign country. I don’t even have support from my partner. I hate that I have functioning depression. I just want to sleep. I only feel better at church or at work. I want to not feel so alone in my relationship with my partner and find a friend. My partner doesn’t seem to care, my church is only older people, and i can’t find other English speaking women to hang out with. I just want to sleep. I feel like no one cares about me. Like I could die tomorrow and only my parents would give a shit. I’m invisible.
At work today I had a deeper conversation with an 10 year old than my partner. It was about a craft and he he was happy I showed him. That is so pathetic that i feel more seen by a child than my partner.

No. 485393

I’m sorry anon. Maybe there are some support groups that could help with financial support?

No. 485405

You can get out of there one day anon. I say this because I went through something similar and it was so horrible, I wish no one had to endure it and I had no idea how I would survive it, but it finally ended and now I'm in the life I'm really supposed to be living. Your sadness makes complete sense because no one is supposed to endure that kind of isolation and loneliness. Keep fighting until you reach the day that your better future arrives. You can leave one day and live somewhere surrounded by friends and loved ones. Remember the things that bring you joy, they are your beacon. Hang in there for them.

No. 485452

Not married to an alcoholic but shacked up with my long term bf and he is a lazy ass when he’s not working and uses the “I work tho” excuse to make me feel bad even tho I go to school and babysit for money sometimes ugh men are so entitled.

Pick up the shit tho, I’m stubborn too but I can’t imagine the smell wafting in my house

No. 485473

Aaaa I love my cat so much. He’s so soft and cute. His head is small, his eyes big and his nose and mouth area and toe beans are all uniform shade of pink. Tsundere af, usually aloof but gets soooo cuddly when he’s sleepy. He still has his kneading pillow that he suckled on as a baby. He grooms himself well and smells good. He lets you put your face in his belly. Aaaaa sorry anons my cat is superior.

No. 485474

Working nights gives him no excuse to not take the dogs out. If he's home when the sun's up, he definitely has the time to take the dogs out. Drill it into him, every 4 or 5 hours the dogs need to go out. Set a timer, anything. It only takes 5-10 minutes to do.
Buy him a pack of antiviral facemasks from the dollar store and tell him next time the dogs shit in the basement, wear one of those. No excuses.

No. 485477

I'm so sorry. Maybe point this out to the friend? Maybe she's not seeing it right, and I could see someone making that mistake because your situation is so hard to relate to. If she stays defensive though I'd remove her for a bit at least, there's no excuse for being self centred like that. Maybe your perspective is skewed because of where you're at but nobody would expect you to emotionally support someone at this time.

You should reach out to some kind of support group, therapy if you can, and I hope you get through it soon.

No. 485479

More info? Where are you? I'm in a kind of similar situation. After 9 months though I'm enrolling in a language course. I tried volunteering and made some fair weather friends at least that way. Do they have meetups in the country you're in? I don't think church is the place to go to socialise if you're young. Have you brought up that you feel alone in the country? What about work colleagues, could you deepen relationships with them?

A big problem is that you feel like your partner doesn't care. The number 1 person in your life and you feel like he's not on your team? That's bad.

No. 485489

i LOVE how a well groomed cat smells. dammit now I gotta go find mine. I always smell peoples cats when I go to their houses they're always like ??? wtf did you just smell my cat? yeah bitch what of it.

No. 485497

its my birthday and not one person wished me a happy birthday. I Don't have anyone. Not one person. I've been alone for so long, I don't know what to do. What makes me the most depressed is looking back in 20 years from now knowing I wasted my youth. I'll have a shitty microwave meal as I do every night, eat it alone in my room and do the it all again tomorrow. I'm not extremely depressed currently but I always think about my killing myself because I don't contribute anything and willl never be anything because I'm basically intellectually disabled. I don't improve anyones life. I don't mean anything to anyone. I just barely exist. Working horrible jobs. I don't know if I can do this forever.

No. 485499

File: 1574330571026.jpg (149.46 KB, 400x400, bday cat.jpg)

Happy Birthday anon!
treat yourself to something small
i recently celebrated alone aswell, even my parents forgot lmao but i bought some cake and watched a movie and it was nice

No. 485500

File: 1574331235906.jpg (31.57 KB, 500x375, d8b447d3726bafa287ac49df068634…)

Happy birthday, anon. You don't have to do that forever, try to take some time to pursue the things that you enjoy.
If your life is so meaningless now, there's no reason not to do whatever you want with it while you still can.
I promise you won't always feel this way.

No. 485503

File: 1574334887658.jpg (13.28 KB, 275x269, 1563234009474.jpg)


No. 485507

You are great and I love you. I will kick anyone's ass including yours if they call you a failure.

No. 485508

File: 1574337525425.png (267.61 KB, 523x454, nope.PNG)

I'm trying to go abroad for a year and for that I have to apply for a specific visa. I can because I have enough money to apply and I have nothing holding me back, and my parents will also lend me money so I can give it back at my own pace. But I keep getting interrupted, I have so many problems with so many administrations doing stupid shit and taking so much time and I just changed my bank because the one I used before was complete trash, I wasn't even able to apply for my visa yet. I want to get this over with asap and it's just so frustrating.

Related to that, because of that I can't get a job in the meantime because nobody wants to hire me for a few months or weeks for anything and I've been a neet for a few months. I hate this shit, it's so boring. I've been trying to beat a few video games in my backlog until I get things sorted out because I really have nothing else to do that.

No. 485511

I swear I'm never taking a vacation with other people again. Friends, family, partner, no matter what the other person stresses out over the most inconsequential shit on fucking earth and ruins the entire experience. Every single time. I'm so over spending a bunch of money to go somewhere nice and fun and having turbosperg 9000 cry about every little inconvenience along the way. If the possibility of having to check an extra bag causes you to have an anxious breakdown, probably don't go.

No. 485515

What happened exactly? I feel like I could have written this post, I can't stand going on holidays with my family because they ruin everything and complain about everything, and even if traveling with friends is fun it can be hard to organize a trip that everybody will enjoy.

No. 485518

Happy birthday anon! I'm the same, but I really enjoy it because for me it's ultimate freedom.

No. 485539

Happy birthday anon! Please know that I love you and I believe in you. I wish I could give you a hug and buy you a nice dinner. Feel better anon, I hope the future will bring good things to you.

No. 485541


Aw thanks anon, for real
Although I didn't get any sleep and my head is spinning haha But that legitimately made me smile and made me tear-eyed

Second vent I guess but I am just so stressed because I think I'm gonna flunk college cause I am a piece of shit and my mom is going to be fucking disappointed and mad at me (she made it clear), especially cause she is a professor herself and she pays for everything in my life

There is a slim chance that I will pass, everything is so shitty right now that I am basically losing hope

I just wish I could fall into a coma until next year and everything was resolved (or not, but at least I've slept), cause 2019 had been a fucking shitty year and here I was thinking that 2018 was shitty

No. 485563

File: 1574350482171.jpg (167.71 KB, 660x880, ugh.jpg)

>sole mental health organisation in the area dedicated to helping people with social anxiety
>only reachable by telephone

No. 485595

I almost just shouted at or assaulted a girl in the bathroom and then ran outside and had an anxiety attack about it.
All she did was say "excuse me" to get to the paper towels. It scared me because I'm ugly and she seemed annoyed. I wanted to punch her since I got the feeling she hated me and it hurt.

This all so irrational and mental holy fuck. It's been several months since my last outburst. I hate this.

No. 485601

Damn bitch get some self esteem and anger management

No. 485605

have you tried text lines anon? not great for like longterm support but they have helped me in the past when I just needed someone to work stuff out with.

there are a lot so I don't have a particular recommendation

No. 485615

File: 1574360610697.png (274.24 KB, 428x434, EJnZQ8XVUAAnQn7.png)

i get so jealous of smart people. people that can work hard. those born with incredible minds.
knowing that they could, in an instant, grasp a concept i've been struggling with for an hour; or that a genius will do better than me in my field or in academics or make a bigger contribution to the world by merit of being intelligent makes me not want to try at anything, and gets me so depressed.
i am seeing a psychiatrist this december though (since for the longest i've suspected i suffer from add or something) but i'm also scared they're gonna diagnose me with a learning disability or something.
i don't know. at the core of this post i'm just sad my brain don't work too good and i wish it fucking did i wanna be a top level computer scientists physicist bioengineer too god damnit

No. 485622

I really wish bathing suits that covered you up completely existed. I lost a lot weight this year and now I'm left with loose saggy skin, cellulite and old stretch marks. I used to love swimming and I thought I would get to take it up again once I lost enough, but I still look really awful! I would be so humiliated to even wear a one piece; my thighs are the worst and my upper arms are a close second. I'm supposed to be going on holiday in the spring to go snorkeling but the thought of putting on a swimsuit and going out in public makes me feel physically ill. I wish I could afford surgery to get rid of it.

No. 485624

Lmao, had to go through the same thing like a week ago. I even asked if I can make an appointment via mail, they said no lol

No. 485626

Get one of those suits surfers use?

No. 485627

Random but the other day a YouTube video from a Muslim woman reviewing 'modest' swimsuits came up in my recommendations and I watched it out of curiosity since I didn't even know they made swimsuits that covered everything like that. Maybe you could check those out?

No. 485629

Oh thank you anons I will look into these!

No. 485630

File: 1574362883328.jpg (63.31 KB, 800x800, -863062317-2085005769.jpg)


That are Muslim swimsuits in AliExpress, maybe you could try Amazon as well, anon. Good luck!

No. 485637

I started a new office job. I like it but they're really slow to train and give me access to the databases. I'm already almost a month in.
I finally gained access to one database, but since I'm not trained there's still not a lot I can do to help out at large. I'm not authorized even if I could hunt down someone willing to teach me. I've been given busywork to occupy some of my time, but there's a lot of contraindications that go along with that (ex. The task is 'Put together shipment folders from files in archive,' but files are missing from the archive I have access to and I don't have access to the locked archive in the building; I can only ask other people if they can find the files and sometimes those requests are forgotten about/go unanswered. And btw there might be consequences of me pulling these files if other people suddenly need them).
I have many folders put together but with like 1-20 files missing from each which is a tad annoying because I could have had all this done if the files were held to account.
Other than that, I've been delegated tertiary tasks that my supervisors don't wanna do. Yet the tasks haven't taken me long at all. Like making a PTO calendar in excel for 2020. Took me a whopping half hour.
Don't get me wrong, I don't mind easy work but there just isn't anything to occupy my mind with for 8 hours.

The awkward part is my cubicle is pretty open. While I love getting paid to do nothing, I don't want coworkers to get irritated at me for appearing to be doing nothing. I try to make myself look busy but it's difficult.
I'm paranoid of doing anything on the company desktop, so I'm just sheepishly looking at my phone while pretending to look at irrelevant portals and already completed excel work.

No. 485665

I think you knew about one piece swimsuits right? Or burkinis? (lol) Seems to me yoo just want to swim in private, just go to private pools and save up money for skin tightening surgery. It's gonna be worth it. Also future skinnies be sure to not lose so much weight at once.

No. 485668

>Also future skinnies be sure to not lose so much weight at once
It's more to do with loss of skin elasticity, losing slower wouldn't help if your skin is too stretched out.

No. 485679

I was 90kg which is of course big but I thought you had to be a lot bigger to wind up with the loose skin problem, like death fat size. Turns out not the case.

No. 485682

My brother is a manipulative, physically abusive, emotionless arsehole (who smiles and laughs when he sees me cry from being injured or having insults thrown at me) and I would feel absolutely nothing if he died a slow, painful death. I'm actually hoping and praying for it.

No. 485684

i hate that I'm only 22 and already have shitty skin. sure my nasolabial folds are just genetic / a consequence of how my skull is shaped, but I had such an awful time for the last decade that crying everyday and blowing my nose made them worse, and gave me crows feet, and I care for myself so little that I feed my body garbage and end up with huge pores and little burst capillaries. which fucking sucks because absorbing cheap garbage food is how I trick myself into thinking im filling up this huge void where affection should be.

I'm just so pissed that I spent my teenage years being abused and destroyed and barely surviving, I feel and look like a ninety year-old and I will never get to experience being a careless pretty young girl that elicits protectiveness and admiration. writing this I realise even my fantasies are bland and shitty and show how retarded and out of touch these few years in hell made me.

the plan to cope is to become really skilled and knowledgeable in my field of study so that I can derive self worth from that, at least I know that's possible with a lot of effort.

No. 485690


Why are high ranking officials in churches so well protected? Why do they bother protecting abusers? I just finished reading above article and I'm so dumbfounded over it all. Some lines that stood out to me:

>Hanssens believes his decision to act as a whistleblower – reporting the abusive actions of Delft and other priests – was held against him by the Salesian order, and says he was later forced to leave the school in Ghent and work more than 100 miles from his home.

What is the point in punishing the whistleblower when you have a pedophile that you keep in constant contact with children?

>Loots says the Salesians are in a difficult position when it comes to dealing with abusers like Delft.

What's the difficult position? What do they have to lose to turning over him over to the police? Isn't this just making a worse image for their church and their mission?

>“Most of the time, it’s impossible that he can stay in the community or the place where he lives or works,” Loots explained. “We have to remove him immediately and then because Salesians are working with young people, we don’t have so much alternatives.”

And yet… you move him into a place where you know he will be with children. Uh.

>But Delft being in the CAR meant he was soon working again in close proximity with children and with little monitoring of his activities. This gave him clear opportunities to violate his court restrictions, and Delft’s latest accusers indicate that he did.

why why why why why

>“We look at that moment for the best possible alternative with the lowest risk that he would repeat his bad behavior. What you are doing is confronting us with that – what we have thought to be the best of all … scenarios – even that wasn’t enough.”

Your "best possible alternative" was putting a pedophile near children?? Does anyone have any brain cells here or???

I was originally going to post this in the stupid questions thread because I really was hoping for a legitimate answer as to why they bother to protect abusers, but then it turned into a vent so I'll leave it here. I'm so frustrated at the stupidity. Like, no one is this dumb to believe that if you put a convicted pedophile near a bunch of kids that something won't happen.

No. 485693

My friend had been whining all day about having to pack and left it till the last second. When she finally started packing and weighing her luggage she realized she couldn't take her laptop as carry on because it exceeded the weight limits for the airline and lost her fucking mind. Full on crying breakdown. I told her she could just check another bag instead and she got even more pissed off. Eventually resolved it but I'm so fucking mad at her and I don't even want to go with her anymore, especially if shes going to keep this shit up. She kept me up almost the entire night crying about having to pay for another bag for her stupid computer.

No. 485695

>at nail salon for first time in ages cause I hate doing my feet
Good grief it's not even the painting, it's the cuticle maintainence and exfoliation. It's such a pain in the ass to do it myself. It's a treat when I don't have to.

No. 485697

I've had bad skin since I was 10 years old. Thankfully, in recent years, my acne has calmed down significantly thanks to incorporating bha and finishing puberty. I still get scars with absolutely every spot i get that take months to fade, even though I don't pick my spots. The worse of it is on my shoulders. No matter what I do, the scars just don't go, even though I haven't had a break out on my shoulders in years. All I have ever wanted was to go outside with a tank top and feel confident. I don't even bother putting makeup on it since I can just opt for longer sleeves, but still, it sucks.

No. 485706

File: 1574374492906.png (137.08 KB, 400x337, 3C2sZ.png)

I just haff to scream

No. 485709

Anon, you are beautiful just because you’re not a cute kid anymore doesn’t mean your life is over and I’m willing to bet you don’t even look that bad. I really hate how society makes it seem that women when they’re not young just aren’t as pretty nah fuck that I’ve seen plenty of women who were beautiful with mature features.
Start taking care of yourself, moisturizing and eating a little healthier to look and feel better about yourself
dress appropriately too, you’ll only look old and ridiculous if you desperately cling to your youth by dressing like a teenybopper

No. 485713

File: 1574375691250.jpg (130.37 KB, 640x436, 1198735762_cc7928d694_z.jpg)

the guy I'm seeing and I don't seem to be working out or just encountered some problems. It's a rather sober thing and we're both rather guarded and cool and distant and it has it's ups and downs. I feel terribly lonely and weird today and a bit neglected. Maybe talking it out would be a good idea but I'm frustrated and lonely and don't wanna be vulnerable right now. So we're just not talking. Idk maybe we weren't ready or it's not a good match. I honestly have no clue right now.

No. 485717

File: 1574375978677.jpg (98.18 KB, 634x603, 250D5C3500000578-0-image-m-4_1…)

don't mind me whilst I scream

No. 485718

God, don't tell this irl to bdd fags, i made the biggest mistake in doing so. Truly a headache to see a 20 year old complaining about being old just because of mental problems.

No. 485719

I get the feeling that men just don’t care about you if you’re an actual human being with flaws. I don’t think I’m ever going to meet someone who is genuinely interested in me as a person. I don’t really have any friends around anymore since they all moved out and I’m not interested in making online friends for some reason. This is basically the only place outside of my family and therapist’s office where I can talk about my sad feelings so yeah…

No. 485722

sadly, there are a lot of cover-ups like this and systematic silencing fuckery going on in the Catholic church and it's horrifying. This ex nun Doris Reisinger is when I last came into contact with the subject but I'm not well-educated on it yet

No. 485723

nta but I could classify as a bdd fag and i always feel/have felt way older than I am, prolly due to being praised for being "mature for my age" and generally being perceived as older than I am throughout my life, yet whenever I think about myself even just a year ago that disappears and it feels like I was just a tiny babby. Like two years ago when I was forced to take 1st year courses I felt like a legitimate haggard grandma despite being like 20 lol, but in hindsight wtf was I thinking! Truly a mindfuck.

why not try meeting women instead then? I'd say women are more difficult to befriend than men but only because women kinda care about who you are as a person kek

No. 485726

File: 1574378687925.jpg (103.57 KB, 1182x1182, 26685777_1410106609118545_6827…)

>friend gets a bunch of dumb tattoos the second she turns 18
>of stuff that's trendy that she barely cares about
>Edgar Allen Poe's face
>a decade on and everything's going blobby now
>makes a status about how someone mistook her EAP tattoo for Hitler
>she keeps posting statuses about it bc she's insanely hurt by someone thinking she got a tattoo of Hitler's face

No. 485738

So sick of this bitch abusing her medication and wondering why her ass is so depwessed and why ewweone ewwse are doing so much better than her. She never fucking once asked us how we were doing, yet just assumes she is the most tragic princess of the land. Take your fucking pills, stop the whining and realise how pathetic and privileged you're acting. I am not taking her ass seriously when she doesn't even fucking take her meds, fucking idiot. All the time she uses whining, the rest of us who are doing so much "better" than her use for actual self improvement. Not some petty oc drama, whining or anime.

No. 485743

I have a lot of acquaintances both male and female and one female friend who is local currently. However, I don’t feel like I can be as open with them as i can with a male partner who cares. I do go out and try to be social at least twice a week but I have problems forming meaningful connections. I don’t think I have a bad personality but I’m definitely not someone who exudes warmth and openness.

In the past when I was younger, I’ve accidentally destroyed friendships because I used my friends as therapists basically and they couldn’t stand it. I think a lot of my problems forming interpersonal relationships stem for that as I’ve become reluctant to open up about my feelings. I’m not traditionally feminine and have some interests that aren’t mainstream so I feel like I’m even more isolated and have more difficulty making friends in general.

No. 485870

I don't want to talk to her. I haven't spoken with her since spring after she rejected and cussed me out for the last fucking time. I made it clear I wanted nothing to do with her, but the bitch still attempts to call me and comment on things I haven't blocked her from seeing on social media. Because now after the dust has settled, she wants me back on her terms and now that she wants me. Fuck what I want and my boundaries.
Even though before she outright resented me, never called, never cared about my social media, claimed I was being horrible to her, that I was being needy, and she flat out rejected me whenever I sought her for affection or reassurance. She was a cold, bitter woman to me then. Yet now that she's lost control she wants me back in her clutches again.
She refuses to see that she's done anything wrong, and she doesn't believe that she has. And that IF she has done something wrong to me, it was because of someone else causing her to act that way.
And IF it wasn't someone else, then she didn't mean what she did.
But IF she did mean it, then I deserved it.
She's even got some family in on this, and there's actually a narrative that she's a victim. That I'm just being a grudge holder.Maybe it's easier for other people to believe that. Since she's been peachy sweet to them and have never been treated like how she treats me behind a closed door.
There's attempts to guilt me into continuing a relationship with someone who has caused me such indescribable stress and grief.
If I'm so shitty, then why is she the one crawling back? For more of my alleged "abuse," or is it cause she done fucked up and none of her manipulation tactics are working anymore?
I'm no longer anxious about coming home after work. I don't have stress acne. I don't tense at the thought of going to gatherings and being around her.
I'm better off without her, and for once I don't care if the feeling isn't mutual.

This isn't a vent about my gf, it's my mom.

No. 485880

thank you for taking time out of your day to answer me, kid anon. I just wanted to be whiny but you are right that I may be able to improve this a tiny bit.

No. 485890

Oh this made my stomach turn anon. Stay strong and stay away. You live for you, you don't owe anyone shit. It gets so much easier in time.

No. 485896

Don't you hate it when people when friends won't admit you're not attractive?

I got into a fight with a guy friend about it. He thinks I'm attractive, but he refuses to admit that I could be unattractive despite the evidence saying I am. I don't think I'm ugly, but I guess I'm not anyone's cup of tea. I got in a big debate about it with him, he just think I should stop being bitter or something.

No. 485909

File: 1574406262793.jpeg (36.35 KB, 576x575, EJ78gQ2X0AAkEHP.jpeg)

fml i just found out this cute guy i was interested in is related to me, i guess thank god nothing happened between us or it wouldve been even more awkward seeing him again

No. 485923

I finally mustered up the courage a few days ago to block my stupid ex boyfriend, but I'm still really sad. I keep thinking about how this time of year last year we were texting and getting to know each other and I felt all giddy and excited about it. sitting in the exact same place in the uni library where I was doing that too. I just feel so empty and sad, like I lost an entire year of my life or something

No. 485934

had a huge fight with my only friend and now i have none left. think im gonna kill myself lol

No. 485949

Or you could just apologize to her…

No. 485957

>It scared me because I'm ugly
Do ugly people get beat up where you live?

No. 485959

Anyone who says things like keep your hopes up is an asshole hurling up patronising lies in lieu of empathy.

Hope? Fucking why? What good is it to let yourself imagine something amazing happening just for it to be a fresh punch to the guts every single time you’re reminded that it’s not gonna happen. Nobody shares their woes wanting to be told a miracle might happen if they just have enough little belief because they don’t give enough of a shit to say anything real.

I’m so fucking done with being told to act like I’m in a Christmas movie and just start magical thinking when I’m grieving the loss of my dreams. Not one goddamn person I can speak to ever let’s me be sad. Gotta choke on some garbage and smile and listen to their problems then cry in the bathroom at home so nobody hears. God forbid you be sad after they’ve given you magical wishing advice! That’s ungrateful and makes it hard to watch tv.

I’m at my wits end and ready to either go ballistic or rope.

No. 485962

i feel so incredibly listless and bored right now and it's slowly slipping into a state of melancholy. blegh i gotta find something to do before i'm catatonic

No. 485968

What dream did you just miss out on?

No. 485969

File: 1574427420721.gif (48.12 KB, 480x480, giphy (1).gif)

sorry that you're unhappy or in a bad place or that life is bad rn and that your surroundings aren't understanding of your pain.

I sometimes say optimistic stuff because I genuinely feel that better days can come and that it can be nice to look forward to sometimes. But that's clearly not true for everyone or in every situation and I don't wanna dismiss the problems and pain and understand it can be patronising or come across that way because most people think when you have extreme problems that a certain attitude can "fix" it when it's not that simple.
You're right that faking optimism when you're drained and don't have it in you is no help. You are important and your experience is real. You wanna be seen as you really are without keeping up appearances and heard in your pain without glossing it over.
I hope people cross your path that do listen and empathise.

No. 485974

What do people like said to them when they're sad? Do you want someone to wallow with or what?

No. 485978

File: 1574429898045.jpg (32.44 KB, 750x742, 1w0oit.jpg)

lo and behold, the time has come to scream yet again

No. 485979

Same anon
I wish we could do this together irl, like some version of fight club except we just arrive alone, scream collectively and then leave alone whenever we feel it's enough

No. 485980

>do you want someone to wallow with or what
not everyone wants contrary input to their feelings. some want to be understood and heard and listened to. It can be healthy to cry and be sad and a relief and just be honest and not glossing your honest thoughts and feelings over. Sadness and anger and desperations are emotions like any other and not bad to face and feel. They can pass on their own, too, and it's soothing to be understood.
You could say affirming things like "I understand" or "I'm here for you" or "I know it's hard" and just listening and being supportive without compulsively fixing everything. Are you unfamiliar with the concept?

No. 485982

No, I am familiar and have felt very bad in my life. But it seems that an "I understand" or relating it to yourself even in a small way could be read as stealing their misery and being selfish. But like you said, saying optimistic things is invalidating. But just saying "that sucks for you" seems cold.

Would "I wish you didn't have to hurt" work? That seems like it could be taken as blowing hot air and not truly caring though. Yet "what can I do to help?" could seem dismissive, as if you're tired of them being sad.

Nothing is right. Idk. I don't want to apply what I like to hear since it varies from person to person.

No. 485983

File: 1574432009709.png (59.3 KB, 498x355, 839a959.png)

this fucking cringy incel in my class has a crush on me. i'm already in a bad place mentally what the fuck do i do?? i hate that i have to deal with this shit too

No. 485986

>Would "I wish you didn't have to hurt" work?
NTA, but I like this. I'd think to myself "well I don't strictly have to.." and it would right away put me in a slightly better headspace.

No. 485987

First you tell him why your instinct finds him creepy, and then you deal with him stalking and harassing you until he goes full postal. Or you say you've got a girlfriend.

No. 485990

Thanks fucking a lot literal whores for making me hesitate using massage wands. Fuck! I really just want to help my sore feet after hours of walking around.

No. 485992

what the fuck is up with this insecure attitude? you just say you're not interested and make sure he doesn't invade your privacy bubble. i think when girls (and b*ys) act like this they are just really insecure and always attract so called "incels" (usually just people their league).

No. 485993

Or you just don't insult him? Why make unnecessarily enemies? Jesus insecure people.

No. 485994

You could just ignore him if it stressed you out so much lol

No. 485999

well, i forgot to mention that he's been stalking me irl and harrasing me online. he also screeches about "femoids" to everyone and frequently mentions how much he hates feminists blah blah.
but yeah, like i said i've been going through so much lately, i don't have the energy to deal with this. too bad i have to see him everyday…

i know i'm probably overreacting and it's pretty easy to deal with this stuff. i just needed to vent

No. 486002

Still sucks you have to go through that. If only you really were an emotionless femoid.

No. 486003

Stay safe anon

No. 486010

You know what, I don't care. I'm done reaching out to my own employer and supervisors for work.
If no one wants to train me so I can be authorized to do work then I'll just sit here and be a deskwarmer. Fuck it. It's not like they're giving me the dignity of paying me enough to be salaried, I get no benefits, and I'm treated like an outcast for being contracted so why should I care if I get paid hourly to sit on my ass and do nothing?
The hardest part is pretending to look busy for the noseys skulking past my cubicle. Oh well, I guess if yall wanted me to be productive your asses would be organized.
Just wish I brought a book to read. Or could use the company computer to look up cooking recipes or browse webshops without potentially getting into trouble. But hell, does anyone even care to be monitoring that in the first place? Who knows. It's a shame I can't work from home given the circumstance.

No. 486026

nah sweety don't nuance this shit, i am the anon you replied to. off with this incel, my bad for assuming he was just a shy autist.

No. 486034

I sound sarcastic now I read it again but I'm serious, stalker men are dangerous pieces of shits. Also
report him because he's screaching disturbing shit.

No. 486036

Oh, I understand then.
It's not easy that's true but I wouldn't say nothing is right.

Sometimes, you can't help them or say the right thing, that's okay, too. But it's good to be there, to try, to listen, to talk and see and hear their feedback. It doesn't have to be perfect imo. With time, maybe some mutual trust can develop and these talks get easier.

Your suggestions are actually really good. Even offering help is good. Just saying "If there's anything I can do, tell me" or "you can message or call me anytime if you need me" is good. It's just an offer.

And yeah, it's awkward and hard sometimes and sometimes all you can say is "damn that sucks, I'm sorry" but even that and just being there can help. You don't have to turn into a perfect psychotherapist, you can just be you and try as awkward as it is. Maybe not everything I say is right or I touch a nerve sometimes but people usually appreciate being listened to and just an opportunity for a heartfelt, honest exchange. I just watch their feedback and maybe I can help somehow and they feel better. Maybe not. That's all anyone can do.

And it's good to encourage someone, too. But don't expect them to respond enthusiastically and agree right away or ever. These things are a balancing-act and constant back-and-forth. Sometimes you're off, sometimes you're bang on

No. 486043

File: 1574439934796.jpeg (719.37 KB, 500x747, 66757555676587.jpeg)

You sound exactly like me right down to your parents and the ocd. I'm by no means "cured", but what has helped me since starting therapy is learning to be able to step outside myself and analyze a situation. I try to pay attention to my body and realize when I'm starting to get anxious. So when I'm freaking out over something minor, I stop and think to myself "Oh this is just my brain being stupid.". I know how incredibly hard it is, but don't fight it. Don't fall into the trap of beating yourself up over your thoughts, it drags everything out and makes things /so/ much worse. I still deal with anxiety, but my panic attacks go away much faster now.
Anyway just letting you know you're not alone and I wish you the best. I hope things get better for you.

No. 486045

why the fuck do men come here? there's tons of discord servers talking about us and invading us. is it really that spoony's fault?

No. 486047

Welcome to the screaming club. Bring yourself and your vocal chords for some carthartic screaming together. No introduction or talking needed. You arrive, you scream.
Place: In the middle between our locations.
Time: Next full moon
See/hear you there

No. 486050

Ooo I wanna see caps. Men get their feefees hurt by being excluded from anything.

No. 486051

Our userbase is so small and slow that if a handful of men descended here at once they would only end up talking to each other whilst poorly roleplaying as women. Crystal Cafe2.0

No. 486058

Isn't that already happening?

No. 486059

i wish

thank you for the concern anons. i think i'm just gonna take the weekend off and clear my head. then i'll talk to some people about it.

can i join you guys?

No. 486062

Holy fuck, I don't know what's wrong with my fans in this house but they give me stuffed sinuses, dry nasal passages, and even ITCHY ears when I sleep with them on – pointed at me or not. I even have liquid being drained out of my ear which eased the itching immediately. I've been currently removing my earwax but it looks like this is a horrible idea as it is making my ears itch more and produce a weird liquid which happened 2 years ago in the same way (but it was worse back then). Seriously hoping i dont have an ear infection

No. 486063

You should stop being bitter anon. Chances are that someone will find you not-repulsive. You kind of sound annoying.

No. 486066

>I'm not anyone's cup of tea
>He thinks I'm attractive

No. 486068

Sounds like your house's climate is way to dry. Time to invest in a humidifier OR to open the windows (since it's winter) every morning for 30 minutes to air it. (if it's cold you're dressing the wrong way and are lacking vitamins).

No. 486069

bddfags are a pain in the ass, legitimately don't bother.

No. 486074

NTA but tell me about it, I had a bpd "friend" who used me and ditched me for her pedophile boyfriend despite our emotional closeness and me helping her over the years. I hate borderline fags and I am bipolar disordered.

No. 486076

A penis doesn't lie, anon. If he says that you're attractive he thinks that you're attractive. A completely honest appraisal. Then if thinks so it's likely that others do as well. You could argue his opinion is merely a subjective one, but then every opinion on attractiveness is subjective. So long as I'm still attractive to my partner that's all I could really ask for.

No. 486088

My older sister molested me when I was younger and has never been a good sister to me. When I say molested, I don’t say that lightly either. She was exposed to pornography by a much older man when she was 12 and was influenced by that and acted that upon me. For years, I’ve told my mother this and slowly disconnected from any contact with my sister. I don’t want anything to do with my sister and I made it clear to my mom. She has NEVER apologized for hurting me or sexually abusing me even when I bring it up with her. Yet, my mom is throwing a fit over me not wanting to reconcile with my sister. I was fucking sexually abused when I was 10 years old and didn’t even know what sex or porn was. I hate this.

No. 486089

Shit anon, that's awful. A 12 yr old girl isn't culpable for her actions, but an adult version of her can still seek to make amends.

No. 486092

Oh wow. I can understand why someone would be in denial and on the defensive for something awful they did at 12 because they were groomed into that behavior. I understand why you can't have a relationship with someone who won't admit to the wrongdoing.
That right there is a tragedy.
Your mom is being an asshole though, it's not her place to force you to have a relationship with someone who abused you and won't acknowledge it. She Just wants her happy family, which is very selfish.

No. 486094

Well I hope your sister gets help. Can't imagine it being easy to confront the fact that you were not only groomed, but you also fucked up your younger sibling.

No. 486098

I know this site hates Reddit, but is anybody gonna be doing Secret Santa this year? I did it last year and it was pretty fun searching for my person, thankfully I had like $30 worth of referral credit for this Asian food website I used for a while.

No. 486104

I don't think your post belongs in the vent thread but I'm very curious about this nonetheless. What's the reddit secret santa and how does it work?

No. 486105

I just meant to say that I hate compliment fishers chill the fuck out, i barely even know what body dysmorphic disorder is and i couldn't care less about mentally ill people complaining about other mentally ill people. Fuck your friend really good, though. And fuck pedos.

No. 486106

Basically you sign up and put in details about yourself and what you're hoping for, usually presents are around $20 so don't really ask for anything too special. When sign ups are done, you receive a user's username and address and can see whatever they filled out for you to get them within the time frame. Someone else gets your username & address & details you provided and they send you your gift within the provided time frame. If the worst happens, the gift for you doesn't end up being delivered, like the person dunked out for a free gift, there's people who signed up to be "elves" and one can provide you with a gift to make up for the inconvenience.
Overall not too risky. They have year round and more specific exchanges if Christmas ain't your thing, or you just like giving and receiving more gifts.

No. 486114

File: 1574452908482.png (1.17 MB, 1280x720, 1434562973003.png)

I just listened to my roommate's dad SCREAM at him for about 2 hours, calling him worthless, a piece of shit, and that he's better off dead because the house isn't spotless and it's a "shitpile", now I have to clean the entire downstairs when I just cleaned – It's just being… lived in. There's no garbage, I admit that I left my purse on the table as I've been running around lately and it slips my mind that that was okay at my old place but not here. I could be losing my room here if things aren't "completely spotless" by Monday.

I'm also just fucking terrified of this man now. I hate men who blow up completely like that, and I feel even worse for my roommate. We also have to COMPLETELY empty out the garage that's currently holding for a lot of our stuff, like future things for an event we hold, or just general stuff that can't be used right now, he wants it completely and utterly empty, including bikes and shit.

No. 486123

Does he own the house or is he paying rent for his son? My dad is like this, I moved out at 18 and now I'll only meet with him at cafes. He threw out alot of my favourite childhood items as a kid cos my most sentimental items were clutter in his eyes. Fuck men like that. I'm now a lil OCD too but I don't control other people or rage because of it

No. 486133

Both my parents are like that. I hate when my friends or roommates are exposed to that so I never invite family to my place.

I would move out for your own sake if it happens again. Homes are meant to be relaxed in and lived in.

I hope your roommate can find a place of their own too one day.

No. 486151

Try using a saline nasal spray before you go to bed. It's also worth checking with your doctor for eczema in your ear canals. What you're going through sounds similar to what I had a few years ago. It sounds gross but it's not permanent and is easy enough to treat. Mine was caused by a certain brand of shampoo.

No. 486153

Owns the house. I really don't even want to live here but like, fuck. Everything besides that is great but apparently his dad is even looking at moving in here?? I can't take that type of yelling around me. I have PTSD and already am wary enough around older men, let alone ones that scream over everything.

No. 486166

>friend you dislike has one trait that could possible maybe maybe not contribute to her bad decisions
>i now hate all of the people who have this trait
god you're retarded

No. 486186

What is the point of quoting the OP of a cow thread in your reply? It's dumb as fuck and I guess I'm dumb for being irrationally annoyed by it.

It's happening so much lately. Is it newfags coming in from the Onision shit or what?

No. 486191

I don’t understand why people say “oh people were complaining but couldn’t be fucked to make a thread.” That’s because they don’t give a fuck about the topic and probably don’t know shit. Why can’t the people that are so interested and know/want to know more do it?

No. 486202

Have posted before about my woes of living in roach-infested NYC, made only worse by my borderline hoarder parents and living in an apartment that was built no later than 1950, but tonight… tonight I just want to fucking SCREAM!!!!!

I was cleaning the floors and getting ready to mop. Having a roach of two hiding in the mop only to get washed out when I dunk it into the mop water is nothing new (though it’s only started happening with this new mop, yes I do rinse it clean with water after mopping). Tonight I dunked the mop in, watching the twisted and dried little strands begin to rehydrate and spread out, and for the inevitable roach or two to come out. I usually watch and wait lest one try to craw up the handle and escape. Tonight it was one… then two… THEN AT LEAST EIGHT MORE SWARMING OUT ALL TOGETHER. I WANTED TO SCREAM AND VOMIT INTO THAT FUCKING BUCKET. There were no less than 10 in that bucket, I didn’t bother to count.

I had to learn the hard way that roaches don’t drown easily, so I just had to stand there and swish off the roaches who kept hanging onto the mop and making sure none were coming up the handle, and then just stand there and pray that the detergent in the mop water wouldn’t take forever to drown and kill them. I dumped the water out into the toilet and made a fresh batch to mop with.

I’m so disgusted. I use diatomaceous earth but I know it can fuck up vacuum filters so I try to limit where I put it to cracks and whatnot (we have an expensive dyson vacuum that I love with all my life, no way I’m fucking that thing up- who knows when I’ll get a new vacuum?) but tonight I went ham and dusted it everywhere. All over the floors, all over the walls, all over every possible surface in the kitchen (where my dad likes to leave a mess long after I’ve gone to bed to yell at him for it, not that yelling at him does anything because he always whines about how he’s too tired to clean up his mess). Also I’m pretty sure I inhaled way too much of the DE. I only have regular face masks, no respirators unfortunately.

Fuck my life.

No. 486203

yes, they’re newfags, and no you’re not the only one annoyed by it. i gotchu anon

No. 486204

Holy shit I’m having flashbacks. Me and my roommate were renting this apartment that turned out to be an overpriced rip off. I kept the place fucking spotless constantly and had the apartment people do sprays. It didn’t help like at all. Roaches infested the drains and dishwasher. I started running the dishwasher empty every day just to kill them. They infested my loofa and I was scared to take showers. One FELL ON MY FACE in the middle of the night when I opened a door, and I had moved my bed in the middle of the room to get away from walls but I still had at least one roach in bed with me once.

Finally I had a fucking all out meltdown when I spent all this time making a perfect BLT and set it down on my desk and looked away for LITERALLY LESS THAN TEN SECONDS and picked it up to take a bit and several roaches scurried our. I dropped it and started screaming and crying and my room mate tried to console me but he ended up having a meltdown too and grabbing the back of diatomaceous earth and dumping it everywhere literally all the floors and counters covered in piles and then we went and stayed in a hotel.

I’m so glad to be out of there. I cleaned that place spick and span on move out day and they charged us for cleaning which is BS, probably all the roach carcasses that died in the 10 mins between us leaving and inspection. They also charged us for a bunch of other “broken” bullshit that I know for a fact was a lie but we were so traumatized we didn’t want to even go back there to contest it.

No. 486208

>diatomaceous earth
You'll need something more heavy-duty for your situation anon. That will only kill the bugs who happen to trot through the powder, it does nothing to address the colonies which are no doubt within the walls and in places you haven't even discovered yet.
You need something like boric acid powder, which can be bought in a big bottle at Wal Mart near the rat traps for less than $4. You finely dust the same way you do DE, but here's the rub: If you see live roaches, dust them with the BA powder but let them live! They'll return to the colony and die with the powder on/inside them, and when they die the other roaches in the colony will cannibalize the dead roach and they will die as well. It's important that the powder is carried back through their routes of travel.

Boric acid powder isn't toxic to humans (unless one is dumb enough to put it in eyes or snort a line) and I don't believe it will harm pets unless they purposefully ingest it.
If you're using DE for pet reasons, then it might be worth it to have someone petsit for a couple of weeks, which is about how long it will take to kill the roaches with this powder.

I stand by this because my apartment had a roach infestation when I first moved in and the shitty apartment management told me pest control wouldn't be able to spray for another month. I didn't have time to wait.
I sprayed powder underneath the fridge, along kitchen walls, cabinets, between the crevasse of the dishwasher and counter, and basically every place I could see a roach crawling and traveling along. I sprayed roaches with the powder when I saw em alive and let them return to their mother roach to die.

No roach activity within a week. A bunch of dead roaches. It works.

No. 486211

I also have some problems living in my parents' roach infested home. Mine is pretty fucking bad, too, for example random places would be roach infested: the hallway closet, the bathroom, the kitchen, my computer desk, ect. I even have roaches constantly crawling on walls, on my water bottles, even my bed and inside my box fans. It makes me wanna kms

No. 486212

That sounds hard, are you coping okay? Would be a great start.
Hell, even a ‘shit sucks’ would be something since it doesn’t give the message that the sadness you feel is a burden and should be kept private.
Anything that isn’t patronising. Any variation of ‘be positive’ is not encouraging like they think. It’s just another punch to the face when you’re already down. It also puts the onus on the person who’s miserable because it implies that if they spent more time invested in magical thinking, the impossible thing will happen. Total cruelty.

No. 486214

I'm on holiday with my parents who I haven't seen in a few years and my mom is pretty clearly in the early stages of dementia (she's mid 60s). Shes always been an anxious spaz but my dad admitted in private that she's gotten a lot worse. It's putting a whole damper on the holiday, I just feel so sad and helpless about it.

No. 486216

First world problem, ahoy.
Just don't get mad at me anons, it sounds silly but I promise it meant something sentimental to me.

This Thanksgiving is one of the firsts that I'll be having with myself and my stepdad. Because I decided to cut contact with my mom, and they're separating. It's gonna be one of the first years that I'm going to be cooking the dinner. Even though I've lived alone before I never got to cook for Thanksgiving specifically. I love to cook, I love new recipes. This year work gave me a free turkey and I was so excited to plan the dinner.

My mom has always been a control freak when it comes to food and completely ocd in the kitchen. Every year it was always the same bland and uninspired slop because she hates cooking and the effort that goes into it. I wasn't ever allowed to make anything, lest I be put down for suggesting anything other than her norm or harangued for disturbing the sanctity of her kitchen. There's actually a running joke in my family that I'm the "gourmet"–always said patronizingly–because I dare want to try new or fresh things. I mean these are the same people who think seasoning beyond salt, pepper, and parsley is "too spicy." They say the stuff I want to make is "too expensive" because they equate quality and fresh food to $$$, when actually most of their pre-processed junk is more expensive dollar for dollar. I digress, the point is that this year was going to be different. Or so I thought.

Lately I'd been juggling a nasty cold alongside my new job. I had zero mental energy left by the end of the day. As soon as I would get back to the apartment, I would fix food for myself and then go straight to bed. Admittedly, I was behind in my Thanksgiving planning but I had an idea of what I wanted: Chestnut, sage, and sweet potato stuffing made from bread; a green bean casserole made with fresh beans and a mushroom cream sauce; cranberry mould from scratch with orange zest; gravy that I'd make from caramelized onions and the turkey drippings that day. Just to name a few.

A few days ago stepdad asked me what I wanted to prepare for Thanksgiving to make a shopping list. I told him a few things off the top of my head but not everything, mentally I just wasn't there. I assumed I had more time. I had assumed we'd go together, to split the cost as well.

Disappointedly enough, he went today without me while I was at work.
He bought garbage. Powdered gravy in a packet, canned vegetables, cheap boxed stuffing. Junk, just like mommy would make. Shit that he wanted because he's nostalgic for it and didn't want ~gourmet anon's~ pretentious dumb ingredients and fresh vegetables and ballyhoo.

He was so dern proud of this haul that I didn't want to rock the boat by telling him just how I really felt. Obviously I can't go out and buy the actual ingredients now because he'd be injured and take it as an insult for not using what he bought. These are turds that I didn't want to have to polish but now I have no god damn choice lest I appear ungrateful even fucking though I ought to be since he was inconsiderate.
I just feel like telling him to make it. Hell, the instructions of how to make everything are written on the packets and boxes he bought so who's to say he can't? Right then.

No. 486220

I'm so sorry to hear that, anon. I really hope that you all enjoy your holiday together.

No. 486222

God I’m fucking shivering just thinking about that. I’m sorry you had to live through that ordeal anon!!

Thank you anon! I was hesitating on the boric acid because of my dog. She doesn’t really eat what she isn’t supposed to (except for the rare occasion she somehow gets a hold of unwrapped chocolate. stupid dog doesnt care for any human food EXCEPT CHOCOLATE) but I did catch her licking the wall where I had dusted DE once. It most likely was because she knocked some food out of her bowl and was trying to get at it, but she’s such an old dumbass I don’t really know what goes through her head. I’ll try to get a pet sitter but our main roach area is the kitchen where she doesnt really wander into so hopefully things will be okay!

I want to fucking cry I walked into my just cleaned kitchen and what do I see? A GIANT FUCKING ROACH. Our apartment building has quite a lot of them but I’ve only ever seen them in the basement, never actually inside our unit until today. I want to cry so bad, I keep feeling like bugs are crawling all over me. I’m gonna douse the whole damn place with boric acid.

No. 486231

What a nasty loser, I'm sorry for you, anon! Dealing with this on top of being down is just awful. Take note and save evidence of how he's harassing you and look into reporting him like another anon suggested.

No. 486249

it wasn't me that did something wrong, it was her but she won't apologise and doesn't think she did something wrong even though i've explained how it made me feel

No. 486266

I’m sick, ugh I feel like crap! My nose is stuffy and my head is burning up. I regret going outside yesterday, it’s not even snowing yet but I already feel like death.
Oh and I have no health insurance at the moment so I can’t even see a doctor, shit.

No. 486271

>Oh and I have no health insurance at the moment so I can’t even see a doctor, shit.
Whenever I read things like this I can't stop being surprised at how anyone is even alive in the United states. How the fuck can you deal with a society where you can't afford to see a doctor? Or get treatment?

No. 486274

It ponders me too, yet the USA is the most powerful country in the world. Also, in europe health insurance is a lot more expensive. But I guess the people want it to be even more cheaper there LOL.

No. 486275

it depresses me so much, anon. how do people have kids like this? they just don't give a shit and/or are idiots. i can't take any american with a child seriously because of the healthcare situation. surely you'd not have kids if their wellbeing can't be close to guaranteed by at least having coverage for all citizens, and coverage that isn't massively marked up, for worse results? americans will defend this system to death. they truly don't care about their kids. even with an absolutely 'great' insurance plan, you should still be under constant anxiety. i have a 'great' plan and i'm always stressed still. i'm constantly anxious given the healthcare situation. and i will absolutely tell you, as someone who has had a multitude of health problems, our outcomes are MUCH worse. we are severely overpaying and have no security, and the doctors are terrible, the quality of care is horrendous, even if the cost goes up. people assume a higher cost means better quality of care, but it's so much worse. it makes me want to cry constantly. there's no reasoning with most americans about the healthcare situation. they bullheadedly believe this is the best situation and that it gives them "choice" and better outcomes when we know for a fact that it doesn't. the american populace just loves to get anally fucked raw and then beg for more.

No. 486288

At least poor people with kids can get on Medicaid and pay relatively little if anything at all.
It's when you make a working class wage or are an adult with no children that you're absolutely fucked.

No. 486297

File: 1574518157609.jpg (119.65 KB, 419x427, ITF1H4H.jpg)

I hope I'll make it short. I know, that vent is quite dumb, but I want to throw my thoughts somewhere.

I have been a part of a circle for two years. Only recently, when I've finally left it because they tried to make up rumors about one of my closest friends because he was really done with them acting like 'mean girls' club, being rude around people who are more popular than them, or around people who don't praise them in general.

But the issue is that I have been around them for so long that I never realized how much they affected me. I have almost healed myself from it, recognized all the toxic traits that I took from them but the issue that still stands is the fact of how much I want to be a short uwu gf. I know it's really stupid and delusional, especially knowing the toxicity of entire uwu-movement, but sometimes I really wish I was 153 cm instead of being 166, because everytime people would talk about height, it would turn into some weird 'who is the tallest cutie' contest, people would keep talking about how short they are, while adding 'ah! u are so short, but me… i am < >- cm shorter than you! uwu life sucks' which led into me, being insecure about having average height. I know men are all about dating 'as short as possible' women because they always want to feel dominant, and I got a boyfriend who is okay with my height, he is my taller than me, but still. It oftenly bugs me in a really stupid way. I also was the tallest one out of this circle which always made me feel weird and uncomfortable, since people would always 'bully uwu' them and call them ~ smol ~, praising them for their height like it's the most important thing. Makes me wish sometimes I was praised for such… Trait? Too. I just want to always feel small and cutesy even though I am cute and such. It just feels like I had x100 extra cute points if I was shorter lol. It is really stupid, yet this thought keeps bugging my head. Hell, I am a part of Lolita fashion and having to experience the issue that a lot of dresses are from 'ultrashort' and girls without bodyshape is pretty lame.

Circle was not related to Lolita Fashion, but uwutuber community and girls were asian.

No. 486300

>I know men are all about dating 'as short as possible' women
Maybe the losers you interact(ed) with lmao. It's true that most men don't want a woman that's taller than them, but as short as possible? I literally talked to my male friend last night about a girl he started dating and doesn't want to be in a relationship with because she's too short for him. All our male friends agreed that this is a turnoff. Both is absolutely stupid by the way (and yes, I think they are losers as well for those comments) and you shouldn't care about this as much as you do. Especially because you can't change it anyway, better start embracing your height which is totally fine.

No. 486303

It's okay anon, you're most likely super cute at your height and I'm sure your bf doesn't give a fuck. I've noticed even girls on here calling cows who are your height "ogres" and it's really odd. I'm a couple cm taller than you and can only imagine how it makes even taller women feel.

But even a girl who is 180 cm+ can be super adorable, so I don't get it. There's a girl I see around my university around that height and she's cuter/more feminine than me lmao.

…and as a side note, although it is common, not all men prefer super short girls. Some want to date taller girls, too. Just like some women love manlets.

No. 486308

they were asian, that's why. it's not like this is super pervasive anywhere else. although i can tell you that being short is super fucking annoying precisely because the most napoleon complexed manospheric men with the worst tempers have a target on your back. they are super invested in finding the shortest woman possible because they're psychotically obsessed with their shortcomings (kek). basically being that all of the incel shit is now obsessed with height + the natural propensity for insecure men to target short women means short women are going to get ALL of the most psycho men coming after them, for the most part.

also i find that height really doesn't matter that much like, more how you appear. i don't feel like i look as short as i am, whereas ariana grande is apparently 5'3 but imo looks shorter than me, or at least people seem to think she looks 4'11 when she isn't. not all short women look petite. i see a lot of women who are taller than me that look more petite so the petite super estrogen thing imo is not all up to height, it's just some evopsych stuff. i think being super thin contributes to uwu more than height honestly.

No. 486316

anon, if it's starting to get to a point where you're uncomfortable it may be a wise idea to start getting into a circle where you actually fit in. Being the token is always bad regardless of ethnicity, but you kinda brought it on yourself.

No. 486318

File: 1574524541471.jpg (11.27 KB, 339x329, EJ_cqCGXUAAvxSb.jpg)

I'm about to spend Christmas Eve second year in a row only with my mom and brother, while my sister spends it with her bf's parents and comes the next day.
Being in hometown alongside my older (I'm 22 and he's 27) brother makes me uncomfortable since the last time I visited him kinda. He showed me some games on steam, because he had to do something meanwhile. Besides that I had to buy train tickets, so I opened the browser. Out of curiosity I peeked at his bookmarks tab. There was ero-dating page and links to the site's profiles. Next to it was folder named "stalk" full of women's facebook profiles.
I still hope it won't turn into something worse.

No. 486319

Of course! Until then

No. 486321

I'm staying at a friend's place for the weekend and it's nice but also stressful for me. I'm glad I'm here but my ability to be at ease in different places with others has room for improvement. Falling asleep yesterday sucked big time and I was so anxious.
Also, still don't know what's gonna become of this guy and me

No. 486322

ew… that sucks, anon. i thank god the only skeazy liability in my life is my predator dad rather than both a dad and a brother. phew. women really need to be more mindful of their male relatives. hopefully he doesn't get worse but he already sounds like a disgusting person.

No. 486323

>I know men are all about dating 'as short as possible' women
This really isn't true. While there are some men that prefer short women, it isn't universal. Some men prefer taller women, some men don't care. If you're happy with a boyfriend that cares about you, he'll think you're cute no matter what your height is. I'm 181 cm and I've never really thought that deeply about it because it doesn't cause any major issues.

No. 486328

I really gatta stop referring to myself as an ugly skinny bitch but it seems so default now. I hate my skinniness and I hate how pathetic I am. Sometimes I wish people didn't have to look at me, just walk by and never see me. I don't want others to see or know what I'm most insecure about

No. 486340

>americans will defend this system to death.
This is something I've never understood when talking about health care with muricans. I live in an European country where we get taxed much more than in the states, but in return I didn't have to pay more than maybe 200 euros (around $220) for my week of hospitalization due to an illness. It covered my IV drops, meds, bedding, food, doctor visits and literally everything. I've had friends who have gotten complex surgeries due to serious illnesses and the state covered all the costs. I have a relative who's bordering on being terminally ill, requires a whole load of treatments and can't work due to this, but the state pays for their expenses so they might have a second chance. My American friends told me that they'd be bankrupt after just a few nights at the hospital. I've seen Americans get dentures at age 25 because they've never been able to afford dentist visits that could've saved their teeth. I'll gladly pay my taxes if it means that I don't have to sell my apartment if I break my arm and can't work for three months or if my SO gets diagnosed with a chronic disease that needs expensive meds. How anyone would call this system inferior is beyond me. When you need a fucking gofundme account for your life-saving surgery something has gone really wrong in your society.

No. 486346

it's because people bitching about it either aren't sick ever or don't know any sick people.

No. 486347

I'm glad I'm not American, my mother would have been dead long ago and my entire life would have been an absolute disaster because of a congenital disorder I have (had?) that's not even a problem anymore thanks to a super expensive long term treatment that would have cost millions of dollars/euros otherwise. Many of my friends would have been fucked over if they were Americans too.

No. 486375

I had tonsilitis and conjunctivitis for over a week not long ago. I was really fucking ill, knocking back antibiotics and painkillers, lozenges, anything to get through the day with as little pain as possible. I have an active toddler and a husband who works full time so I was still doing mom and wife stuff on top of dying. Eventually recovered, still don't feel 100% but I'm better than I was.

Husband gets a cough. An annoying cough, but no aches, pains or sore throat. Oh my god he's being such a wuss. Suddenly looking after the child is too much because cough but he's well enough to play video games cough but he's soldiering on, how brave. cough I swear our family would fall apart if I wasn't around to do literally everything for everyone.

Also, a friend of mine lashed out at me because he asked if I had a problem with him moving in with his girlfriend of three months, and he pushed and pushed until I gave him an answer. I said I thought it was too soon and OH BOY DID HE NOT LIKE THAT. Because TWOO WUV and WHY CAN'T YOU BE HAPPY FOR ME and a bit of HOW CAN YOU CALL YOURSELF A FRIEND IF YOU WON'T SUPPORT ME. In the end I was just like, okay whatever, you do you.

Anyone wanna take a vacation with me? I'll get the drinks in.

No. 486382

id rather taxes over the near 500$ deduction from a paycheck every month to ensure i actually get to use my insurance.

the money is pooled together so essentially when you pay for insurance, even if you dont use it, someone else will. even though i need care, someone else is receiving it whether i can use it but thats not taught so instead its wrapped up in the idea that oh no we are all going to be taxed more uwu fight that.

so all those tumblr idiots that think taxation is theft is feeding into that because lets be real if we all had a little more tax, our healthcare would be taken care of and school could be better or roads or whatever. yet they will bitch about not being able to afford housing food or healthcare

No. 486408

>in english class yesterday
>almost the end of the semester
>so far this class has been really nice, no major arguments or anything
>everyone seemed so mature
>discuss our readings for the week from our book
>it's about femininity and such
>doesn't even mention a lot of politics, just talks about cultural perceptions of femininity, etc.
>discussion goes haywire
>this is unusual for our class as some people in particular are just being rude
>wish I had videotaped it because words cannot convey how bad it was
>one dude who is usually very pleasant was just bitching in the corner, obviously triggered
>he would not stop talking oh my god
>another older gentleman was being stupidly aggressive as well
>professor is a doofus and they're all just having a circlejerk about feminism and women's rights
>getting angry because corner idiot and old man are saying inappropriate things and the professor isn't catching on
>me being retarded, I blurt out "why are the men are dominating the conversation" since this is about women and no one is asking us how we feel, it's just them having a male moment
>whole class: shocked pikachu face
>explain that this class has been so good up until that night, wtf happened
>also mention that the two idiots in particular were out of line
>professor looks embarrassed
>pick me bitch starts defending them and getting worked up, saying "women are an issue too uwu"
>tell her she's not the problem, why is she making excuses for their bad behavior?
>keeps talking and putting me down, don't understand why she's lashing out at me as I thought we were on good terms
>can tell she wants to say something rude so start ignoring her because it's like she's trying to bait me or something
>I decide to leave the class a few minutes early because I'm hungry and am just over it, pick me won't stop talking
>I know I'm stupid, but I was really disappointed last night
>I really thought things were so good after being in terrible classes where people have meltdowns over discussions like this
>was surprised at my professor for not seeming to care or realize how some of the men were acting until I mentioned it
>oh well, life moves on
>I know they're going to be upset when we come back from holiday but it is what it is

No. 486410

I have no medical insurance with my current job and Im kinda regretting it now. The due date has already come and passed but I didnt want to get it because im rarely ever sick and they take it out of your paycheck, and I already make so little. The other day I was sweating at work and starting to get the itchy feelings on your breasts that you get sometimes. I didnt really scratch it or anything but when i got home i did. I didnt look at my tits before to see why they were itching i thought it was just because i got hot, which happens all the time. All the sudden i felt pain. I looked at my breast and there was an almost lesion? looking mark on my breast where i had scratches. Almost like a circular area(think from a cigarette burn, but i dont smoke or anything) where it appears a layer of skin got sloughed off? Its not big at all and it doesnt hurt too much, but ever since then it has stung/itched a little, and it has a clear liquid coming out which im assuming is plasma, but after putting bandaids on it, when i take them off, the liquid shows up yellowish on the bandaid. There was never any blood, theres no pus or anything. But i looked up so many different things and couldnt find a picture of anything that looks remotely like it. And its scaring me. Also, after I take the bandaids off I started noticing that made the area hurt worse, and where the sticky parts of the banaid were, there are little rips starting to form on my skin in those areas too? There isnt really any redness around the actual wound, just where the sticky tabs were. I know the skin on the breast is more sensitive than most skin but im so weirded out. Its been two days. Its still not bleeding or excruciating pain or anything but ugh. I really wish i had signed up for insurance though it would have cucked me out of even more of my paycheck. This sucks.

No. 486415

File: 1574545119265.jpg (97.33 KB, 679x665, ghvcc6h.jpg)

how to survive frend's party despite being umcomfortable and not able to talk to anyone. it's so awkward aaaa

No. 486416

Just leave

No. 486417

I feel emotional about tomatoes not being in season and the fact there's no way to know if canned tomatoes were picked and canned while in season or if they were grown in a factory.

No. 486419

Just go up to people or wait for them to come up to you and ask them how they know your friend. It's a pretty basic conversation starter and you can use whatever they say to jump off to another point. Like if they know each other from uni, ask about what they're studying or something like that.

No. 486424

>grown in a factory.

sorry about your retardation.

No. 486439

File: 1574549679479.gif (495.94 KB, 220x144, tenor-2.gif)

No. 486452

File: 1574553340534.jpg (351.06 KB, 819x1015, d3dtdv2-120e81e1-0684-4e5b-806…)

If you're a Eurofriend you can get sun-ripened canned tomatoes from Italy easily and for relatively cheap all year around and maybe more regional ones, too. Other places, I'm not so sure. Probably an organic, expensive brand. But you can get lucky by researching it and maybe there are brands with sun-ripened tomatoes

I'm guessing ESL and they just forgot the word for greenhouse

No. 486467

File: 1574558395080.jpg (62.47 KB, 563x607, huh.jpg)

My emotions have been all over the place these last couple of weeks.
I just get depressed, anxious, then suddenly happy again. Even my dreams are getting scarier.
what is going on?

No. 486469

i'm so fucking irritated i need somebody to calm me down and the only people i want to talk to aren't around right now. fuck everything. fuck.

No. 486472

hormonal imbalance, maybe? change in diet?

No. 486478

whY the Flip is Love so complamicated??? Mmmmmooohoomg

No. 486486

File: 1574563594705.jpg (83.82 KB, 1280x720, ORQlF.jpg)

>date comes over who I met through an app
>get into bed
>making out
>feeling my ass
>squeezing my boobs
>light spanking
>eats my ass
>"Oh man anon, if it wasn't my personal rule to not have sex on the first date…"

You put your tongue on my butthole but some basic intercourse was gonna push the envelope, eh bud?

No. 486489

did you just invite someone over to your house that you met on an app? that's dangerous anon, I hope this wasn't the first time you were meeting them

No. 486491

Nta, but that seems to be a common thing done in this day and age I think.

No. 486493

Been video chatting and talking with him for awhile. Plus I had someone else here so I wasn't alone.

No. 486494

so? common =/= safe

okay, that's better

No. 486495

Didnt say it was safe. Just not shocking as it seems to be what a lot of people do now.

No. 486508

literally the first rule of using dating apps is to not meet for the first time at your or his house. what the fuck anon

No. 486511

My boyfriend took a picture of me sucking his dick and later he sent it to me saying "cute pic!!" I look like a fucked up dead eyed alien with my eyes going different ways cause I was trying to keep eye contact with him when he took the picture. Holy fuck how am I that ugly and how can he think that's cute.

No. 486512

Anon, I think you might be missing the biggest issue with everything you just related.
Why the fuck would you let your bf take your face picture engaging in a sexual act? Don't you know how common is for men to share those, not only after a bad breakup, online?
You can't have that kind of liability around, that's just putting your image in future danger. Fuck being pretty while sucking dick, only a porn actor should care about that kind of thing and not care about her image doing the act existing in digital format one button away from being shared online.

No. 486513

More like how can you be okay with him taking a picture of you like that? Lol.

No. 486519

He likes it cause it's his dick your mouth. The goofy face you're making is just the additional ego trip.
It ain't that deep sis. Although next time you meet I'd ask him to delete that pic. He's already proven immature enough to send it through text. Just hope he's not the bragging type for your sake, otherwise he's probably sending that embarrassing pic to everyone.
Never agree to pictures like that unless you wouldn't be ashamed if they were publicly posted someplace.

No. 486541

Hoping he doesn't share it with friends or online especially seeing as your face is in it anon. He likes it cos it's an ego rub for him and possibly because your cross eyed expression is degrading

No. 486555

This sounds like a disaster anon
>Taking porn photos of you
>sending them across the internet

Like everything sent online gets put into databases and servers, and in goverment records: to quote Snowden "Yes, the goverment have your dick pics" and even if it's just on his phone it might be automatically uploaded to a cloud server if his settings are to do that.
Apple phones automatically scan and tag images with keywords so you can find them again

screaming into pillow
Obviously it's different if you're an online sex worker and your image is already out there, but if not, this is very concerning.

No. 486580

File: 1574596097514.jpg (119.27 KB, 480x621, b52727b3b3326e4d6abb8b5c911a79…)

>liking your straight friend
>liking your straight friend especially if she's in shit relationship that she won't leave
what the fuck anons what will Freud say about me

No. 486605

I spend the last 6 months going down a huge rabbit hole of aviation and naval disasters and now I'm on a ship that's currently rolling back and forth in high winds and my heart is racing. All I can think of now is all of the terrible shit I read. I regret everything.

No. 486642

The post about the estonia in the "down the rabbit hole" thread sent me on the same track as you anon.

But I had to stop after the 2014 SK ship. Broke my heart

No. 486647

has anyone else seen some anons/rfs on tumblr too afraid to call pedo pandering/ddlg girls pedos (which is what they are)? yeah yeah child abuse, but they literally think about being a child when they're getting screwed. what's not pedophilic about it?

No. 486648

Recently moved out and while my new housemate - who's also my landlord - seemed nice enough at first, she is actually insane and driving me crazy with her "healthy diet" obsession. She constantly preaches how harmful meat, gluten and sugar is and that people in general eat too much anyway as water and vitamins would be more than enough for our bodies to function. She claims she sometimes eats these bread-things she bakes out of vegetable powder, oil and seeds, and while I have seen her baking, I never actually seen her eat them, or ANYTHING else for that matter. Her fridge is always dead empty.
I was eating instant noodles the other day and I got a passive aggressive comment about how 'she used to eat those too when she was my age and it fucked up her digestive system beyond repair'…
She is also a caffeine addict and sometimes drinks coffe late at night and consequently runs around the apartment like a poiosoned rat at 2 am in the morning. send help

No. 486665

anon, keep in mind that ship accidents are rare.
but I feel you, I also made myself paranoid by listening to black box recordings, and now every time I get on a flight I have panic attacks.
I was also obsessed with reading about the Sewol ferry disaster, couldn't believe something like that could happen. those poor kids

No. 486669

If the fridge is empty then you know she ain't cooking. She's eating out or buying snacks. It's anyone's guess what she's actually eating but it's probably not mindful 100% of the time. In my experience, people who go on about health and diet when not asked or prompted are usually saying it for themselves because they're the ones with the guilty conscience deep down.

No. 486683

File: 1574618329673.gif (1.91 MB, 259x251, r1EMHw6.gif)

I don't want to study anymore, I don't want to go to uni anymore. It's not fun, it's not interesting, it's not even good for my future, at this point I only do it because it's better than nothing. I wish I wouldn't have felt for this retarded meme. Just so my family could gloat about their (grand)child going to uni but now even that became worthless because they are disappointed in me anyway and shit on me behind my back under the pretense of being concerned for me. Must be nice to be in their shoes, always able to switch standpoints to be right and make themselves the center of attention. But I can't even drop out because then I would confirm their belief that "I wouldn't make it" and "they knew it all along". Deep down all I wanted is for them to be proud of me and finally respect me as my own human being. All my life they shut me down, screamed at and punished me whenever I voiced my thoughts or my own opinion "because they knew better", interfered every single time I tried to be even a bit inderpendent and made everything about them at all times. I was nothing but a pillow for them to lean into and only existed for them, as an extension. And now, almost 26 years later they turn around and say "oh how could this happen? Why doesn't have my (grand)daughter any goals of her own? Why doesn't she have any motivation? Why is she such a failure, what did we do wrong? We must have been too nice, we coodled her too much :((". No you don't, you fucking suffocated me and any sense of self and confidence I had and then tried to fix your abuse with food. The truth is I did have secret goals and motivations but you either never even bothered to listen to them, talked me out of it or immediately made fun of them. You only ever cared about yourself and how you appear. I wish I could go back and tell my young self to say fuck it as soon as I finished 11th grade. Fuck aiming for higher, fuck having a bachelor in my resume, fuck the higher paid job meme. I never cared about any of that, all I wanted was a quiet life on my own, to be able to live out my creativity and independence. But now I'm almost 26, tired and mentally stunted, with no experience in anything and still stuck in this grey, dirty shithole infested with stubborn mold on each wall, monthly burglaries, dogshit and sad faces everywhere and still the always ready pillow to punch it out at. It's basically a dead end. No matter what I end up doing, I already missed out on any chance of happiness or satisfaction.

No. 486700

you are young and your whole life is still yours to claim. cut off contact to a toxic family isn't easy, but it's feasible. they need to stop judging you by their values on you and let you be. if you feel overwhelmed by your studies, there is alway the option to take a break and resume your studies later, or never, your choice whatever feels right for you. most unis have an office for helping students under mental strain, please reach out for help.
whatever happens, do something today to live out your creativity and pursue your own goals, you'll feel better right then.

No. 486713

yesterday I stepped on my kittens paw on accident and he made a noise and I have not stopped crying about it. I feel so awful and I've been trying to give him extra attention and treats and playtime, but I just feel SO guilty. I woke up this morning and started crying because I remembered as I was getting dressed. I feel like a fool because he's okay but I also cant stop feeling bad about it. I'm supposed to take care of him and he's so small and fragile and cute, I should have been extra careful when I was walking and I'm upset that I didnt consider he could have been walking with me (like he does a lot)

No. 486717

I remember reading that if you hurt a kitten, then pet it/show affection after immediately it will understand that it wasn't your intention to hurt it.
Kind of like when kittens play with their mom, mom gets a bit too rough, the kitten cries, mom starts licking it, all good.

No. 486733

I've been dating and idk if I'm picky or if most men on dating sites are just ugly and or boring. They dont even try to look cute in photos and they take photos are the most unflattering angles…why would you take a picture close up to your face with the camera facing you from below?most of them love doing this.

No. 486734

AYRT and the Sewol one easily fucked me up the most. I couldn't watch the videos or listen to the messages, it was too sickening. I don't know what kind of monsters could leave hundreds of kids to drown.

But yeah, while logically I know that there would have to be a huge chain of fuckups for the ship to capsize and murder me, my dumb lizard brain is yelling at me to flee the giant metal floating thing. Reading those accounts made me wonder seriously how I would perform in a life-threatening emergency. I want to believe I'd be heroic and brave but I feel like I'd just panic and get myself killed, lol

No. 486739

I read about the Sewol incident earlier this year and it breaks my heart. i cannot imagine the pain of th survivors, as well as the parents of the children who died. i know the captain got life in prison, but it was such an avoidable small series of events that could have saved everyone or at least way more.. it hurts to think about

No. 486741

I just started a new job a few weeks again. I like everyone i work with a lot, but i still feel like i'm slower at tasks than my coworkers. i cant help but feel i'm weighing them down. i'm trying to get better, but i feel like shit at the end of the day.

No. 486745

>on dating app
>"Hey wanna go on a date?"
>"Sure thing."
>"Okay, where would you like to go?"
I automatically unmatch because these are the types of guys who dump all the mental labor onto women to think up dates. If you suggest something, you plan it and I'll see if I can agree to it. If I don't like it then learn to take a rejection of an idea, and maybe then the ball would be in my court to suggest something else.
Can someone let these lazy fucks know how shit works!

No. 486749

There is that social rule that if you specifically invite someone to join you on a date then you should probably pay or at least offer to, maybe this is some roundabout way of guys getting around that? I've seen guys describe all sorts of mind games they play in the beginning to 'figure a girl out' and see how little effort they can get away with giving

No. 486751

you sound entitled and spoiled as fuck

No. 486752

How is asking someone else for plans and then expecting them to make plans for you not entitled and lazy?
Anon if you do this stop it. The people who you do this to are annoyed.

No. 486756

Anon I'm lesbian and simply commented on the games that straight people play on tinder, calm down

No. 486783

lmfao my longterm boyfriend still pulls this. Makes fun of me for not knowing where I want to go out to eat so I ask, "If its so easy, why don't you pick?" He never has an answer. Same thing with my dad and brother. It's like they're braindead and need us to pick up the slack.

No. 486812

I had a cat when I was a kid and she bit once when I was giving her a bath because she was scared. She immediately started licking me even though she was still in the water. Just made me love her 1000x more

No. 486847

making friends in college is such a tiresome process.

i’ve been casting a wide net and talking to lots of people, as well as joining clubs related to my major / hobbies (though such opportunities are more minimal due to being at community college).

however, it just seems like i get along (surface level) with lots of people, but resonate with almost no one? in high school, i has a pre-ordained “friend group” that i hung out with (hyper-online, tumblr queer kid types), but i’ve fundamentally changed since then, and no longer share many commonalities with that sect of people.

yet, i can’t really seem to find anyone that i just “vibe with”, like i used to with my old (high school) friends. it seems like i tend to find enjoyment in intial conversation, but then everything peters out, and i realize that i just… want socialization but don’t actually like or feel engaged by the person i’m trying to befriend, for the sake of having anyone to talk to.

i’m just fucking sick of the friend making process. i met another philosophy major that i’ve gotten on with, but i suspect they already ghosted me because i played devil’s-advocate to one of their baseline “woke” platitudes, despite the fact that i was very thorough, and gave lots of concessions to their original argument, establishing that we were both coming from a place of relative agreement.

i dunno. shit is exhausting. has anyone here has similar experiences? did you inevitably find “your people” in college?

No. 486889


I live in a dorm with almost 60 people and my class has over 40 people.
Out of all of them, I've only met like, 3 people I vibe with.

I don't really talk with anyone in class because 75% of them seem like they need some reality check asap. Also, I get so invested in the activity we are doing that I kind of isolate myself to work better. Some months have passed and I think I'm lucky I didn't aproach anyone too quickly, because I realize a lot of them are not what they seemed at first hand.

At the dorm I get along with almost everyone, but I only have a deep relationship with a group of girls. I have a few acquaintances and that's it.

I'm also tired of meeting new people. Don't sweat it and try to have a time for yourself. Once you're a recovered from the experience, open yourself to new people again. Right now I'm just enjoying time alone, doing my thing without having to please others.

I'm sure you'll meet someone, sooner or later. I did, so you will too!! I wish you the best of lucks.

No. 486899

>spends 40 dollars to make my boyfriend his favorite meal as well as buying several testing materials so he can go back to school
>Delays hours on end after the meal is made to play magic the gathering despite telling me he would be there hours earlier and I had to call him three times and both ended with "I'll be there soon"

Why are men like this? Is it even worth it when they don't want to be productive with their time? What's the point of helping someone who doesn't want to help themselves when all he literally has to do is show up

No. 486905

Good question. Y'know a lot of men are complaining that women aren't traditional anymore but when we do stuff for them they turn around and treat us like this.

No. 486906

Good question. Y'know a lot of men are complaining that women aren't traditional anymore but when we do stuff for them they turn around and treat us like this.

No. 486916

men take women for granted in relationships across the board. no, it is not worth it. if i want to be taken for granted and my efforts overlooked, i'll just get another job. men in relationships treat us like terrible bosses do.

No. 486919

In my experience, men eventually just want you to be their mother. Thewy act like petulnnt children, throw tantrums and silent treatment galore and if they're made to have a confrontational conversation they equate it to a telling off or nagging. It's fucking exhausting being straight. If I didn't have such a biological desire to have children I'd check out of romantic relationships altogether.

No. 486921

true, but anon, that's a ridiculous reason. there's so much to put on the line to have a man's child… you're risking the child's happiness, security, your situational stability, emotional wellbeing, etc, when we know "good" guys often turn out to be not so good within enough time. that's a lot to gamble when we know how predictably disappointing men are.

No. 486929

I'm straight, I'm attracted to men and I want a family. That's not a ridiculous reason to have romantic relationships. I've only been in LTR and lived with two guys, was engaged to one but ended it because it wouldn't have been a good family environment. I'm still hoping I'll get that fairytale but it is fucking exhausting dealing with an inherent societal problem of sexism and men being dickheads

No. 486938

My dad leaving fucked up my trust in men and now I constantly have the feeling in the back of my mind that my lovely and kind bf is going to leave me one day.

No. 486943

I have the same problem because both of my ex boyfriends were amazing at first then slowly cut me off and abandoned me. they didn't even have the balls to actually dump me, they just kept making more and more excuses and then eventually cut me off.

No. 486961

I really wanted to "put myself out there" to get a serious relationship, or any relationship at all tbh, but I feel I'm still way too incompetent and unaccomplished in my life for anyone to ever feel interested in my.

No. 486963

I feel you. I’ve been trying dating apps but can’t even bring myself to swipe right on anybody because I feel like I wouldn’t live up to their standards. I’m at an age where I feel like I should be independent and making money but instead I’m just living at home.

No. 486973

Kind of silly considering that if a man was worth anything he wouldn’t be found on dating apps

No. 486983

nta but even more silly if you go outside and observe that tbh the average person you come across in the shops or whatever also has next to nothing to offer yet they're somehow not single

No. 486985

it always escapes me why fucktards go to the part of the library that is specifically for studying and being quiet and then have the audacity to talk and eat. there are signs up every where that say QUIET ZONE and NO TALKING etc and there other study areas that are designated for talking and eating, but no, they have to go the quietest, echo-y-est part of the library to talk, laugh and eat loudly and fuck up my studying. is it that much to ask just to have one quiet area?? really?? oh and the library staff don't give a shit, they just walk by and watch it happening. and a lot of times (but not always) it's not even students, it's fucking hobos who just walked in here to watch videos on their phones or old people reading the newspaper. are you a hobo who wants to hang out in the university library? fine, just be fucking quiet please, thanks.

sidenote, I fucking hate people who eat in class too. fuck people who do that.

No. 486986

Not really related but one time I got chewed out by an officer in the library because I was sitting at one of the many “student only” tables.

There were literally no kids in the entire library since it was a weekday during school hours, and the few non-student seats were already taken.

No. 487029

i've had a paragard iud for almost 3 years now with no complications during the insertion or after, but in the past 3 days i found out that it failed. i am 6 weeks pregnant, have never been pregnant before, and i am in no way prepared to become a parent right now and my boyfriend and i have decided that it's best to abort. the state that I live in is one of the most restrictive in terms of having laws that delay and limit abortion access and we'll have to wait maybe two or three weeks and pay out of pocket for it as a result while already low on cash… and it's the end of the semester and after a personal tragedy earlier in the school year i have so much work i'm falling behind on - i think i'm just in shock at how terrible my luck has been in the past few months

No. 487034

I knew there were places that put limits on it, but intentional delays? That's completely horrifying

No. 487038

i went on a date with my on again off again bf of almost 5 years (we met when we were teens) and there was an ad for wedding rings on the movie screen and he said “we’re gonna have to get you one of those!” i was super flustered and not expecting that. then later when we were eating together we were talking about life expectancy and i asked him “do you think you’ll outlive your wife?” and he said “probably, you’re older than me” it was really sweet but i hope he’s not messing with me about getting married because i love him so much. i don’t want to get my hopes up for nothing if he doesn’t mean it. we’ve split up in the past, first times bc we lived 5 states away from each other and LDR was hard, then we ended up living in the same state and he randomly ghosted me shortly after we started dating again because he was afraid of our relationship ending like it did before. which i don’t believe cause afterwards he ended up getting in a stupid online relationship with some random instagram girl from russia. granted i’m the one that told him to fuck off when he started talking to me less so he had the right to move on and get a gf but still, it was his fault. but then he came back, he always comes crawling back to me, and we got back together and our relationship is really good. but that ghosting thing stresses me out. he tells me he didn’t mean to, but still.. then i remember we’re both still young, i’m 21 and he’s 20, maybe this won’t even last anyway. oh well.

No. 487040

Damn, anon. That sucks. I had an abortion in March if you have any questions, but I'm in the US, so idk if things may be different where you are.

No. 487042

You're being played, dummy. He's just stringing you along because you always fall for it.

No. 487050

You sound like an entitled little princess uwu uwu

No. 487061

>Tinfoiling about how he is going to dump emotional labor on you because dates should be planned by both parties
You sure sound like a catch

No. 487063

i'm just tired of feeling like a failure, even if i'm accomplishing great things in my life i always feel like isn't enough and that i should be ashamed for not accomplishing more than that. i have never been more active in my life before, i used to be a dead weight but now i'm on college and making money with my art and progressing with my music skills and living on a good place but ??this just isn't enough and i don't know why???
i feel like i can't stop making excuses to feel bad but at the same time there's no excuses there, i just feel like i could be doing more, i could be better at things and everything that everyone do is always so much better than what i do and this is killing me and taking away my will to live
i got myself thinking about suicide a lot lately and i'm seriously worried because sometimes i'm a very impulsive person and i feel like it's just a matter of time until i wake up having a bad day and then just jump out of my window for no apparent reason, i just can't take this pressure anymore, i don't know why i do this with myself but i can't stop

No. 487065

scrot bait detected

No. 487067

you sound really prone to negative thoughts. maybe try to practice looking at things as not good or bad.

No. 487074

excuse the Freudian cliche, but what is the relationship with your parents like, anon? asking because I have also struggled with feelings of inadequacy and realized that I have internalized my mothers' critical attitude towards me (she constantly compared me to other kids when I was little, saying that I should be more like X or Y, and never said anything when I got good grades, but would not speak for me for days whenever I got a grade she perceived as 'bad'. which was like the equivalent of a 'B' in the US edu system lmao). therapy helped tons.

No. 487078

File: 1574681663542.jpeg (66.45 KB, 1124x292, 4C0FE80F-F9D9-4F8F-9C78-62CABB…)

Forgive me if this is better suited somewhere else but I unironically hope onision fucking kills himself. Like yes he has kids but he’s proven to be an abhorrent father who does bare minimum. He’s been around for 10+ years and only exists to do evil nasty shit and he will never stop or change. He’s rotten to the core and will never do anything good for this world. Fuck that guy.

No. 487089

Almost everything men say about women is projection
>Women are so ungrateful no matter what you do!
>Women just give silent treatment instead of discussing issues
>Women always take men for granted
Vice versa
>Women judge men's body's so harshly!! If you don't have a male model face, 6'3 and a body builder body women find you useless
>Women look to cheat every chance they get
>If a woman dated Chad she will never be satisfied with other men

They project more than movie theaters

No. 487094

>Y'know a lot of men are complaining that women aren't "traditional" anymore
I hate this rhetoric, men complaining about the quality of women going down. How women are no longer feminine and able to care for their family.These things are uttered by literal overweight alt right incels. Who are the furthest thing you can come from a classically masculine man

No. 487100

society and lacking upbringing adds (delayed) pressure. sounds like you lack self-worth and never feel good enough and compare yourself compulsively (with others or just an inner image of better than you because if you don't feel good enough, there has to be an idea of what would finally make you good enough like an unreachable carrot on a stick dangling in front of you). that's why your accomplishments don't feel rewarding and you're not happy with them or yourself. maybe you're not making up reasons to feel bad but you actually do feel bad and some of your emotional needs aren't met. as adults we are responsible for all our needs. some of them we don't even realise because nobody ever taught us to feel them and care for them.

No. 487105

this can even happen through obvious or subtle neglect and/or nagging and these critical attitudes. When children get (partially) neglected and (some of) their needs aren't met, they falsely burden themselves with the responsibility and develop a subconscious attitude that it must've been them and because they weren't good enough, these needs weren't met. When they don't feel good enough, they start to make inner images of that idealised state of being "good enough" and run after it.
That's why caring for ourselves deeply and self-soothing and healing is so important.

No. 487127

Been there, done that. He's messing with you and will ghost you the moment you let him back into your heart. He is far too young to want to settle down and sounds immature as fuck. 100% will cheat, the marriage thing is a red flag to love bomb you. I've been there, please find a man you can trust.

No. 487129

You're not alone my dear, please don't hurt yourself. I and many of my close friends have felt the pointlessness of it all. It sucks, but you've got to stop comparing yourself to others.

You are you, you have a lot to offer. You aren't just your talents and your successes. You are your kindness, compassion. Others love you not just for how well you are doing in life, but for the person you are and the soul that's inside you.

Life's a bitch. Sometimes we have to force ourselves to look at the good bits, but they're always there

No. 487135

Yes this, I wish I had known about 'love bombing' back when I was 20

No. 487141

Males are retarded beyond repair.

The year that the new ghostbusters movie was announced my brother was visiting for the holidays. He bitched about how new ghostbusters is going to “ruin his childhood” and said that it was stupid to have women ghostbusters because girls don’t like to get dirty.

Did you forget your two sisters who love ghostbusters, loved getting dirty, and loved playing all the “boy” games and with “boy” toys with you? I was even literally obsessed with paranormal shit.

No. 487144

tbf the 2016 ghostbusters was without a doubt absolutely shit

No. 487146

It’s not “to be fair” because the movie didn’t even exist yet, and if it does suck it’s not because women exist

No. 487147

No. 487149

My 40 year old ex bitched about this at the time. I had no idea Ghostbusters meant so much to him.. but suddenly it did!

No. 487150

Dude the new Ghostbusters WAS a piece of shit and potentially ruining the reputation of the franchise. It was a cheap cash grab, made by a smug male director, merchandising feminism by making it a superficial grrl power!! and they abused the SHIT out of that in their advertising. The actresses were treated like shit on the set. The original movie was a classic, lightning in a bottle, and even I, as a feminist woman, hated the whole premise of the "all-female ghostbusters team fighting against muh male academia" because it's as low effort as it can be. It's not empowering, it's not entertaining, it's just trying to pander to the lowest common denominator and trying to guilt trip people into giving them money because they'll hate feminism otherwise.

No. 487151

Virgin shaming isn't cool, dude. Misogynists are misogynists whether they ever get laid or not.

No. 487152

>and if it does suck
but it did suck

No. 487153

What’s even more tragic is his fiancé was standing next to him smiling. What a dumb ass pick me

No. 487154


Ok back to whatever hell you came from, you no saging scrotes

No. 487155

Didn't the ghosbusters remake happen around the same time that people were bitching about a female Thor comic being made? Guys I know who had never read a single comic gave out about it ruining Thors character too..

No. 487156

But if you point out that it was a male creation they’ll reeeee into oblivion

No. 487159

Jane foster as thor was only bad because she had cancer and was told there was a cure and she said “no thanks, I’ll beat it on my own”
And some of the, “look at us, we are liberals” junk was annoying too

The rest was fine as far as mantle passing goes

No. 487161

You must be new here

No. 487165

I feel so much better since leaving lolcow. It really did impact my mental health negatively. I used to spend hours on here, now I only check some threads once in a blue moon. I'm less angry overall, less judgemental and more accepting of the reality I am living in.

No. 487196

>frame my toxic relationship like I'm talking about a partner
>"Omg anon you were right to cut off that person, you're doing better now and what matters is how you feel."
>reveal the toxic person is actually my mom
>"Welllllll anon she is your mom and that's really sad you don't want to contact her anymore. She probably isn't doing well."

Why are people like this?

No. 487198

I felt the same way, till I came back. This site is a fucking drug, wish I could quit but I keep getting sucked back in.

No. 487203

I'm so fucking annoyed. I have an exam tomorrow I'm probably going to barely pass because I'm struggling to get through all this stupid fucking algebra that you need to do the review questions. Fuck!

No. 487208

sending you a tiny little prayer. I hope you make it.

No. 487209

baby steps, we can do it!

No. 487212

Using the term “Brown people” to describe Latinos/Middle Eastern people/South Asian people is such a condescending term. But woke twitter seems to love using it. Especially in regards to Trump and Latinos. How hard is it just to say Hispanics or Latinos in that context?

I feel like if it was 20 years ago, that term would’ve been seen as racially insensitive but now it’s considered progressive? What the fuck? Not all Latinos are “brown.”(global rule 7)

No. 487213

ship anon check back if you are alright

No. 487232

File: 1574713499700.jpeg (74.17 KB, 502x277, 1522166011552.jpeg)

Found out the guy I was crushing on fucked a prostitute

No. 487242

>get sick
>develops into bacterial infection
>go on antibiotics
>enjoy clearish skin for about a week
>red hyperpigmentation from previous acne and pitting scars but hey no new breakouts, yay
>enjoy that shit for a week
>antibiotic is done
>slowly but surely deep cystic pimples coming back

Well it was fun while it lasted.

No. 487243

Come on MODS, nta but, her comment was against fake woke twitter sjws and not really baiting for a discussion. It doesn't really break the rules. A lot of anons post similar things about the whole 'white people' thing that twitter also loves.

No. 487249

I'm fine! The weather has calmed down a lot.

No. 487253

>Any race related posts or discussion is prohibited per global rule 7.
Repeat offenders are subject to a permanent ban from /ot/.

>All discussion of race whether positive or negative is banned from /ot/ and /m/. Repeat offenders may be permabanned from these boards.

No. 487257

File: 1574720584721.jpg (7.14 KB, 275x275, 1532408072297.jpg)

I've been struggling with my weight recently. I've been eating regularly, but I've been dealing with a lot of stress and anxiety so sometimes I feel like my stomach is shut down. I'm not ana tier yet thankfully, and I'm going to see my GP this week to ask for help.
However, my mom is stressing me out even more by screaming at me because she can't deal with anything that requires good parenting skills, so she calls me names, says I'm crazy, threatens to take away my laptop and my books (??) and overall acts as if I want this and as if it's all my fault.
Now she brought it to the next level by asking "You're thinking of suicide, aren't you?" with a mocking/defiant tone, and by saying "I hope you start losing all your hair, so it'll teach you a lesson".
In such an environment, no wonder I'm fucking depressed. Why even having kids when you're such a shit person?

No. 487260

Is 20 considered too old to be starting a 4 year university course ? My friend said I’ll be a ‘mature’ student and it made me feel like a fucking crypt keeper.

No. 487261

File: 1574720942476.jpg (7.76 KB, 210x230, poster,210x230,f8f8f8-pad,210x…)

Period brain is turning my stupid brain into absolute mush. I feel like I'm stuck in the feedback loop of hell, going back and forth through thinking about my ex, being sad about our break up, then being sad and upset about me being sad and upset because I should be over this by now!!! I hate being so self aware of what my brain is doing and how awful it's making me feel and feeling so helpless that I feel so powerless to do anything about it besides sitting here, waiting it out, and trying my best not to cry. I normally do just fine dealing with these thoughts but my period makes me feel like I'm being crushed under the weight of it all.

I wanna go rock climbing and take my mind off of things but I'll have to pay an extra $10 to go in since it's after 3pm (have an early pass cause it's cheaper and I normally only go weekend mornings) and it's going to be crowded as fuck and I don't want to deal with my inevitable climbing anxiety on top of all of this. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck please send me cute puppy and kitties.

No. 487262

Absolutely not. I've been in plenty of classes with older students and no one bats an eye at them.

No. 487263

lmao no? also your friend sounds like a dickwad, pretty sure you wouldn't legally qualify for a mature student even, it's only as if you'd taken 2-3 gap years. there were plenty of 20-23 year olds in my courses when i was in my 1st year, literally no one will bat an eye and it's not like there are TREMENDOUS maturity differences either.

No. 487270

File: 1574722999475.png (79.12 KB, 540x614, pzn26vC2B11wjwprio1_540.png)

Here you go, anon. Hope you feel better soon.

No. 487274

File: 1574725120981.jpg (119.01 KB, 811x739, 1559843812219.jpg)

You will not be considered old, not by a long shot. People won't even be able to tell you're older than 18/19 unless you tell them, and if you do they won't care. Your friend is either really fucking stupid or deliberately trying to upset you.

a cat for you anon!

No. 487275

Sometimes I feel like I'll never be loved the way I want to be loved. I've been in relationships before, I've had people say they love me, they do things for me and show they care… but it's never in the exact way I want and I end up disappointed. I guess most people would be lucky to have bfs that treat them the way my partners have, but I'm still uneasy about it.

When we got into disagreements and I felt hurt, it always seemed like it was about them winning the argument and preserving their ego, instead of looking from my point of view and considering my feelings, and that's where I believe their true self lies. In the end men don't seem to care much about our feelings if they deem it to be trivial or illogical. No matter how good they are, they'll just be stubborn and cold and never apologize from the heart like most women would. Women would be empathetic and feel bad for hurting you, even if it's completely unintentional. Men would think that they shouldn't have to apologize because they didn't mean to hurt you, that you're at fault for feeling that way. I understand since people are indeed responsible for how they choose to react on their emotions, but it's still a cold robotic way for someone who is close to you to think.

I just have a bad view on relationships right now.

No. 487279

I started uni at 25 just this year finished with a masters at 29. You'll make friends at 20. What I noticed was that the mature older guys that were like in their 30s had no issue having friends with the younger guys, but I didn't get the same comrade. Not to say I never worked with amazing students and I never experienced hostility. The only time I got fucked over by another student is when I teamed up with a 40+ year old woman and she tried to email a lecturer that I didn't do any work. It was for a video presentation. We scripted it, I was in front of the camera and she wanted to edit it cause she bought a new mac book. Little did I know she was going to try and fuck me over. The lecturer emailed me and I was completely baffled, showed him our plan and pointed out I was the only one in the video demonstrating the procedures. We both got As and she never spoke to me again lol

You'll be fine at 20, remember that you're going to be mixing in with a lot of new students, it's not like following on from the last year in highschool were everyone is familiar. People won't know your age til your asked.

No. 487282

File: 1574727027710.jpg (62.37 KB, 500x350, gFp1V1sfyp69o1_500.jpg)

I want to apply to a job again so bad but I can't get passed my stupid anxiety about interviews.
I can handle crazy/nasty customers anytime but it's the interviews that make me want to die. How do I get over this anons

No. 487283

Not at all. That's not much older than the average demographic of college students considering a lot take gap years also. There's a really diverse range of people ranging from recent graduates to parents to people getting a new education for a different job field. No one is going to care and you're still young anyway lol

No. 487287

I gained over 70lbs in a distrubingly short period after my grandma died. I'm only down 10lbs since. I blame myself 100%, but I still expect some basic sensitivity from those in my life. One pretty thin person is sperging like crazy to me over an 8lb weight gain over the span of a year and I want to fucking strangle her. I genuinely want to drop her completely over this.

No. 487288

I want to become an animator but fuck I don't know what to do,I live in a third world country and I'm not even certain who will I hire etc zero money too

No. 487291

This sounds whiny but every time I write about a problem I'm having I get ignored, called autistic (I'm not), or told to commit suicide in threads where the majority get actual advice and/or sympathy. I should be used to it by now but it still kind of hurts each time it happens. I think I'm just unrelateable. I always offer advice and listen attentively to my friends' problems but they get quiet if they hear about mine.

No. 487301

Was your friend joking and you're autistic? People still go to uni in their 40s anon. I had plenty classes with parents and even some sweet boomers.

No. 487302

Please tell us what problem you've been writing about anon. It must be incredibly milky.

No. 487307

Thanks for the replies- yeah she said it so offhandedly and it just stuck in my head. She already knows I feel bit apprehensive about going since I've skipped a few years.

No, she definitely wasn't joking, I was more venting the question in disbelief that someone could think so matter-of-factly that 20 was a mature student. Now I'm pretty sure she was just saying it to get a rise out of me or something.

No. 487308

I don't feel like they are particularly milky or anything. My problems are pretty minor stuff I just wish I didn't get as many negative reactions.
These events were all spread out over this past year.
>in break room at work taking my lunch
>about to leave
>coworker stops me and apologizes to me
>apparently he was talking shit about me and didn't realize I was in the room, I didn't hear him because I was concentrating on my own stuff
>ask him what he said because I try to be polite and nice and keep a low profile, sad that someone thinks of me enough to talk about me in that way
>he refuses to tell me, feel even worse
>talk to people online about it, give a description of myself and my behavior to try to find out possible things that people dislike about me (a stupid idea but I was pretty sad about it)
>they tell me they think they would dislike me irl because of my typing style and that suicide is a solution
Some time ago
>talking about fear of being alone after moving away from hometown because I haven't made any new friends for a long time and have forgotten how to form new friendships
>get told to stop being an autist
With an irl friend
>we are relatively close, she vents to me about her relationship and other problems on a regular basis
>tell her that I feel like I'm losing my personality because I don't have any time to do anything but work and study (was a difficult semester for me) and that I don't want to become someone who only complains about work and school
>she goes quiet for a minute and then tells me "ok then…"

No. 487310

I'll be honest, you do sound like you should kys.

No. 487312


No. 487313

she sounds like a bitch that's trying to make you insecure/pull you down. go to uni if you so want to! if you feel insecure about your age, i understand it can feel like those 2 years between 18 and 20 is approximately 2 decades and you're an absolute hag but literally no one can tell how old you are exactly, even if you're particularly haggard or something (t. particularly haggard anon who had to take courses with people 2-3 years younger than me and was terribly insecure about it at first).
learning wise, i'm sure you'll still be able to retain information and, if anything, you'll probably be better equipped and determined to face your studies than those fresh out of hs!

also i fucking wish i qualified as a mature student, the financial aid they get here is insane, a coworkers wife went to college at like 50ish and got paid 3k a semester in living grants hnggg (the studies were free themselves)

if it makes you feel better, i'm a fairly regualr lurker but had not come across your posts/have replied to them in a disparaging way. it probably is your wording, even in these short rundowns you sound very insecure and self depreciating. like i understand how you'd be upset in these situations as i'm also those things kek, but sometimes people can get annoyed when you're overly meek and whiny. hang in there, fellow whiny-chan!

No. 487314

Why the fuck is it so hard for people to text back? Am I just totally fucking insufferable?

No. 487317

Thanks for the constructive advice, in the past all I've gotten were insults or an "I don't know what it is but I don't like you". It means a lot to me, good luck with everything on your end as well.

No. 487318

One of my favorites is the old "women talk too much/gossip" one. The most leaky like a sieve fuckers I've ever known have been men who can't shut up or keep info to themselves.

No. 487319

>I, as a feminist woman
I only watched the original movie a couple years ago and the feminist inside me was kinda annoyed at how creepy the protagonist was towards the woman. He's really an unbearable character made for "the guys" but its a fun movie otherwise.

Idk you made me think.

No. 487321

The movie has a lot of boring sexism/sexist tropes, and lets be real. It wasn’t even that fucking good to begin with. It had a catchy song and a dorky idea that makes kids like it. That’s about all it has going for it, it’s not some masterpiece

it’s just as dumb as the new one and actually most people don’t hate the new one, and all the kids I know who saw it liked it just as much as the old one

No. 487323

The old one made me laugh a few times, but yeah it's dated as hell. Seeing all these men crawl out of the woodwork suddenly defending fucking Ghostbusters, like it was some great artistic masterpiece, was baffling. I can at least understand the anger if you're defending the sanctity of, you know, Apocalypse Now. But Ghostbusters? Fucking really?

The whole drama around that is when I officially stopped giving a shit about Hollywood remakes and reboots. I used to get so pissy about them. But after seeing the mass sperging that one caused, I was just like "Fuck it, Hollywood's gonna make em, stop crying all the time and just don't go see them".

No. 487326

I’m in the same Fucking boat. Feels like I’ll never meet someone who will actually respect my feelings

No. 487346

File: 1574744243838.jpeg (36.36 KB, 480x480, 2444B11D-AEE2-47BB-9C7B-C6A21C…)

My dad started screaming about how awful I am because I started a load of laundry before HIS bedtime. I don’t even know if he had laundry tonight.

He texts me shit about how much he loves me and is proud but then turns around and calls be a stupid bitch behind my back because he thinks I can’t hear him. Screams when I dropped a sandwich, screamed at me when the person I asked for a letter of rec from was taking too long, told me that I was lying when I told him I loved him. One time when I got home from school and locked me car, I could hear him screaming all the way from the sidewalk because he was mad I had gotten home. I want to escape this hellhole but I’m too financially dependent, and even if I wasn’t I’m so depressed from growing up here that I can barely think about functioning. It’s honestly a miracle sometimes that I’m graduating college, or that I’m even still fucking alive.

No. 487347

That's heart breaking anon, I hope you can get out of there soon. You deserve better. Congratulations on college.

No. 487351

I wish so damn bad at this point I could just get a certain sex toy. Can't afford it since I'm really low on all money and that'd be weird to ask for Christmas. Never had sex, hate the idea of pregnancy and kids so it wouldn't be with a man. Just don't trust condoms, birth control, or stick in hormone things. My estrogen is already too high naturally so even the lowest dose option gave me awful side effects. Not looking for any kind of relationship I just want this sexual frustration gone. Also very frustrated that as time goes by nothing seems to turn me on when I want it. Literotica was my last option since all other forms, especially real life porn hard cater to men.

No. 487356

File: 1574749037674.jpeg (48.9 KB, 640x480, 1FC89C08-6346-4EF7-ACFE-2547DA…)

Thanks anon, I appreciate it. This is just the tip of the iceberg. My dad has PTSD and while I’m empathetic to the fact that he goes through a lot it also means that I’ve grown up as an emotional punching bag. For years I never even was able to classify as what he did to me as abuse because he never hit me, always had food and shelter, and since I’m an only child I had a lot of toys. I was always seen as the lucky rich kid so I never felt like I had a right to complain.

He yelled at me when while I was crying as he was being deployed to Afghanistan. During middle and high school both my parents would come in and yell at me for crying, even if it was completely unrelated to them. They couldn’t handle my emotions on top of all the tension so I always had to push down my feelings. I had this habit when I was younger of just completely shutting down, not being able to talk or move for fear of making things worse. This would only make them angrier because they couldn’t coax shit out of me. They’d always blame my computer addiction and being a teenager for my extreme moodiness and isolation. In hindsight it was because staying in my room on my computer was the only way to entertain myself while still being out of the way. There was one time when I was a SOPHOMORE in high school and they found this quiz from 8th grade that I had flunked. Literally a 10 point daily quiz that had such a little impact on my grade. I got yelled at and berated by asking me how I was gonna ‘fix’ this even though I had already graduated middle school, got an A in the class, and was a fucking sophomore. My dad gets visibility agitated if I go in and out of my room too much especially while doing chores. He likes to stand in our kitchen and watch TV while eating microwaved canned soup because he’s a grown man who can’t cook, but huffs and puffs if I’m standing there too long actually making myself food because I’m not a fucking idiot. Just last week I had gone to thr bathroom at around one in the morning. When I laid back down I noticed that the hallway light was on so I figured I had accidentally left it on. Get up and turn it off and immediately hear “JESUS CHRIST ANON!” Apparently my dad had gotten up to check on our pets who had been freaking out, flipped his shit when I turned off the light, and then accused me of b4ing why they were upset because I had been getting up too much. He threatened to kick me out over something a few months ago, I honestly can’t even remember at this point but it’s because he thought I wasn’t grateful enough. Also told me I had developed really ‘convenient’ migraines because I had been missing school, even though there had been several weekends where I had spent the entire day laying in darkness, he just thought I was being a shitty recluse and never bothered to check. All of this and yet he pouts at the thought of me moving out soon and always insists that this is my home but never fucking acts like it.

Sorry for the wall of text but I needed to just pour this all out anonymously. I feel like my friends don’t take me seriously because I’m such an airhead because of the depression and an angry mess from everything else.

No. 487357

those situations all suck, im sorry anon

maybe there's something about the way you type that attracts the edgelords on here

No. 487359

File: 1574749813386.jpg (46.27 KB, 500x375, 1535703865454.jpg)

My company is getting acquired.

I love(d) my profession, colleagues, company, clients, company culture, etc. I even loved the stupid shallow morale-boosting emails upper management sent around crunch time and holidays. I can't surface any major complaints that I could have had while working here. It was the perfect job for someone in my profession with my specific professional values.

Finding a new job in and of itself won't be too difficult, but god damn this sucks. This job provided me with the first few stable years of my post-undergrad life, after suffering through some seriously fucked up work environments, and now it's like the rug got pulled from under me and all of the work that I have done over the past few years may as well have never existed, and soon I will likely never speak with most of my colleagues again.

I will probably get paid more in my next role, but the work culture at this company was perfect and my manager is an extremely good mentor who more or less runs an egalitarian team and encourages mutual learning and innovation. Following a strict chain of command and standard procedure is now wholly unappealing.

As a passionate corporate drone in a particularly gratifying line of work, it's easy to get invested in the business, which makes it all the more devastating when someone has removed your purpose. This situation is especially crippling if stability is one of your main values. But the most humiliating part is that the business tries to retain their worker drones against their best interests with cheap, shallow attempts at morale-boosting so that they can keep the company running as smoothly as possible until the drones' years of work can be properly erased from all but the memories and portfolios of the workers, and all of the especially loyal drones who were dedicated enough to stick around are dumped and given a few weeks to figure out how to feed their families, while the acquiring company celebrates the completion of the weaker company's death and those few drones who managed to stick survive the acquisition put on a smile and try to adapt.

Still better than academia tho

No. 487374

Can't afford $20 dollars? You can get pocket rockets or egg vibes cheap. And the site I use is always having sales so you can even get smaller simple silicon stuff for not that much.

No. 487384

File: 1574764475316.jpg (103.88 KB, 1080x810, UaEscmK.jpg)

Well my computers motherboard has now died I no longer have a computer. Thanks to the anons who replied to this. Hope I can find a job soon to fix everything

No. 487386

Is it your first toy? If it is then you're better off experimenting with cheaper (but still bodysafe) toys before investing in an expensive one

No. 487405

I used to be a huge fan of video games, grew up with them. Spent a lot of time in fandoms etc. But in recent years, I don't care. There is a FF7 remake, I loved FF7 and I don't care. Other adults are freaking out and loving it and starting the same shipping wars (should Cloud be with Aeris or Tifa?!) that they fought in as kids. It's bizarre to watch. I should probably be glad that I have moved on but at the same time it feels really weird to no longer care at all about something you used to love a lot. Kinda empty?

No. 487413

i'm really sorry anon, that sounds like an absolutely terrible environment to live in (well, idk how much you can call this level of walking on eggshells living) and i hope you can move out soon!

No. 487417

NTA but the people who should kill themseleves are sociopathic edgelords like you.

No. 487423

In my second year of university and despite loving what I’m doing, the idea of entering the world of work soon terrifies me. I’m a massive introvert and I feel like just having the personality I do I’ll never be comfortable in any kind of role. My lack of social skills/shyness has always been brought up as a point of criticism since I was about 6 or 7 and I constantly feel pressured to have to fit the role of a confidant, outgoing person. I have to do presentations and group work all the time, ‘network’ with strangers and try and make myself successful and a functioning worker. While I’ve learnt to repress a few of my spergy characteristics I just feel like I’ll never feel completely comfortable or adjusted. Does anyone else feel like this, and if so how do you deal with it? Any tips on how I can become less socially retarded?

No. 487427

It's the same for me anon, I will graduate next year and am absolutely scared. I study to be an primary school teacher and am doubting if it's the right choice for me. While I like working with young children, I'm very afraid of having to move out, being the "new" one at school, the older teachers and all those tests I still have to do in front university officials during the first years of my working life. Plus I'm scared of not passing my final exams, one of them will also be oral which I'm obviously shit at.
I always think what if I just worked in a office? But then my hours our lounger and I hate being away from home for long. What if I just became a secretary? Low responsibility, but I'd have to take phone calls and I absolutely can't talk on the phone. It feels like there's not one somewhat nicely paying job that doesn't involve acting extroverted. I have been saying that for years, my ideal job would be the night shift at a gas station lol
My parents were super strict when I was a child and now wonder why I'm so quiet and scared all the time. And all that pressure to "Go out! Smile/talk more!" just makes me feel worse and causes me to act even more retarded.

No. 487429

File: 1574777285332.jpg (69.97 KB, 1014x749, cjxpm5ek25d11.jpg)

You two should try recovering NEET thread, its for us anons who want to learn how to be normies

No. 487438

I've had bad diarrhea for the past two days due to a meal when I ate out. My butthole hurts so bad. I don't even wanna go to work today because of my aching butt but I gotta. They won't accept a sore butthole as an excuse. I have to make it to tomorrow at least..

No. 487440

File: 1574778834042.jpg (96.54 KB, 870x740, original.jpg)

Thank you anons, my period brain has calmed down today.

No. 487442


No. 487448

anons I'm the same (especially that part about the night shift at a gas station kek). I've finished my master degree (law) this July and I had my first internship during this last year where I had to talk to a lot of people. I thought like you, I could never do it or feel comfortable. But it actually went totally fine. Of course I still didn't like being around so many strangers and having to be friendly all the time but I didn't hate it, I did my job and people were happy.
For tips, I don't know if other anons feel the same but when I was working my mindset was different. When speaking with a client/coworker I wasn't thinking as much about how to not be awkward, I was just more focused on "I need this info" "I have to tell them this/make them sign this". You will be more confident in what you do as time goes on and become more assertive.
Another tip is basically that you can be introverted, people don't really care, just don't appear unfriendly/rude. For example I know I can appear very cold so I smile a lot (I know very cliché) but it absolutely works. When your coworkers greet you or whatever do a real big smile as you greet them back it will make you seem nicer and more open.
When you'll be starting your new job, if you don't work with terrible people they will pick up pretty fast that you're introverted/quiet and will be nice to you as long as you're not fucking up your job.

No. 487451

Doesn’t anime production gets outsourced to third word studios all the time?

No. 487464

My boyfriend decided to throw a massive bitch fit an hour before we were supposed to go to a dinner I planned for a friend from out of town. I'm very introverted but work in the entertainment industry,and had a very busy weekend with people everywhere so by the end of it I was completely over any form of human interaction and just wanted to have some time to myself.
He knew I was in a bad mood and tired yet kept pestering me for sex and attention, then had a fucking meltdown over being "neglected". I've been with him for 10 years and he knows that I've never been a touchy feely/affectionate person and like my space, (he is the complete opposite) yet he wants to drag all this bullshit up before I have to go to a dinner with friends, on my only day off? Wtf.

I probably should have been more sympathetic, but I tried to get him to stop crying so I could calmly explain that I had just had a rough weekend and wanted space but he kept wailing about himself "woe is me, nobody cares about meeeee" type bs, and completely ignored what I had to say, which caused me to get extremely pissed off.
It was a terrible reaction to have to someone who was upset, but I was so unbelievably disgusted by his behavior that I just absolutely lost it on him. If I want my space, I'm going to have it and he can fuck off. I'm not here for his convenience, I'm a human with boundaries and feelings too.

No. 487465

He literally started crying because his girlfriend of an entire decade didn't have sex with him because she was going out for the evening?? Maybe confirm with her beforehand instead of just assuming and then having a breakdown?

No. 487485

File: 1574788848720.jpg (28.84 KB, 463x403, ec3e43ae-f4da-4424-93ee-083d9c…)

I can't help but be jealous of some of my old classmate/acquaintances because they're being "successful" in the fitness "industry" or whatever I should call it. I don't dislike them for it and am not saying they didn't put in work, but most of the time they have no idea how fucking lucky they are that they could afford the stuff that brought them the success - school, paid apartment, classes, gear, training, food etc.

I never even considered taking it up as a career simply because it's not peofitable in my country and because the nearest school is 2 hours drive away. Must be nice to have enough money to pursue something you really like without having to worry you're wasting your time.

No. 487501

You too can take steroids. I believe in you.

No. 487506

File: 1574794002321.png (458.69 KB, 626x479, tumblr_pnl5l1Ubja1xz2jvyo1_640…)

Just deleted my social media apps (not accounts but those weren't active anyways). Basically I have no friends and no use for social media and i can feel myself relying on imageboards and anime again to keep me occupied. it sucks. I have around a 90% average in my 7 classes yet I feel dumb, unfulfilled and tired of everything. I feel like I have no hobbies and truly no one to talk to and it's my own fault. I just want to give up and be a neet again but i already had to redo a year of highschool so I don't want to be behind in life again. Not that I feel like I could start my career anyways but im just. idk. that's my shitty vent. I guess ill be spending more time on here again, just like old times minus the pt and snow shit.

No. 487507


This article makes me sick. I saw a headline from a different newspaper today about people writing into my city's governor, absolutely fucking pissed that Amazon pulled out our city. Articles like above make me fucking glad they pulled out. All I can imagine is my parents, both of who didn't go to college or really get a proper education, eventually having to turn to work for Amazon to make ends meet and then getting hurt on the job and punished for it. It makes me so, so sad. Fuck amazon.

No. 487510

File: 1574795192764.jpeg (50.85 KB, 660x457, 297F183C-D60F-4257-8AA1-CD8E33…)

Thanks anons, it’s good to know others have been in the same boat and gotten through it

No. 487515

My grandma died and ofc i am sad

No. 487525

I'm so sorry for your loss anon.

No. 487528

Imagine spending so long looking and wishing for a bf only to realize you might actually dislike it because you can no longer ogle random men (and women).

I'd have to delete all my cute guy pics. Maybe stop drawing porn. Try to stop getting crushes on so many people I meet. Being a single, lonely, horny woman has destroyed me lmao.

No. 487529

Not everyone has to pretend they don't find other people attractive anymore when in a relationship. Most guys would probably like you drawing porn if theres women in it tbh.

No. 487530

I have the same problem, anon. Maybe try asking in the NEET recovery thread?

No. 487538

>Not everyone has to pretend they don't find other people attractive anymore when in a relationship
Yeah, because some people genuinely do find only their significant other attractive. It truly does happen.

No. 487539

I don't see the problem with drawing erotic art, unless the content is too crazy/demeaning.

No. 487540

>talk to people online about it, give a description of myself and my behavior to try to find out possible things that people dislike about me (a stupid idea but I was pretty sad about it)
Why was it a stupid idea? If you knew it was a stupid idea why did you do it anyways expecting a positive response? It sounds like you kind of know why this was insufferable to other anons. I'm sorry for what you're going through though and the anon upthread who told you to kill yourself is a dumb cunt just fyi
Edited to add more bc you deserve to feel like you're being heard: your coworker sounds like an asshole and he really fucked up in that situation. Not only should he not have been talking shit at work, but he outed himself and you didn't even know. What an idiot asshole. It sucks that you now have to wonder what was being said but try to let it go, or write it down so you have a record of harassment if it comes down to that. No one deserves to feel like that at work. You were just minding your own business too… I feel you. Your irl friend who brushed you off sounds like a bitch but of course I don't know the context… maybe tell her that it hurt your feelings when she said that? And as for the autist comments regarding you struggling to make friends, that's just how lolcow is sometimes. Sometimes you get a cunt replying to you and sometimes you get a caring person. If you really need wholesome support I suggest you go to Reddit (not kidding). Good luck anon!!

No. 487545

this, seriously.

No. 487547

brehs my biological mom thingy made a good point today - who DO I love? nobody i guess. can humans live without love?

No. 487550

Or just don't sacrifice so much. Your bf won't do the same for you so…

No. 487551

Must be 18 to post here

No. 487553

my boyfriend is such a boring ass normie and i don’t know why the fuck he bothers calling me at all when 90% of the time he’s not paying attention to anything i say

No. 487556

I hate the word "ghosted" so much. So many people think they deserve to hear an excuse to cut off a relationship. Majority of the time they're not literally ghosted, it's just a gradual thing and they try to guilt the other person for not being their friend anymore.
Maybe I'm just used to people dropping me as a friend so it doesn't hurt me as much. I remember when I decided to stop partying to focus on my mental health and to stop feeling miserable at work, so many people acted disgusted towards me because I said I don't like drinking anymore. Over time I realized I'm glad they stopped talking to me because I wouldn't have to hear them talk about their drunken escapades all the time, like it almost became the only "interesting" thing to happen to them. It got boring.
I recently saw a comment on a Facebook post from someone I went to high school with trying to act all boo hoo because one of her friends she's known since childhood stopped talking to her "out of nowhere" and apparently it was worse than a break up. Her friend is an elementary school teacher, this girl complaining is an EDM DJ. I knew exactly which friend it was right away and I can see why they'd break off their friendship. As I see it, the friend parted ways like that so she wouldn't burden her with guilt for growing apart. Priorities change and it sucks seeing this girl trying to guilt her via Facebook.
I also hate when people complain about someone they thought they were planning to date or something ghosting them. Like, be glad they did it so abruptly, now you can focus on someone else instead of them. Yeah, maybe it sucks, but they're literally giving you the freedom to find someone else, no explanations needed.

No. 487557

File: 1574806922155.jpg (77.08 KB, 600x600, 0365122a2169ffb7af9e3b330fc3f5…)

fattychan rant incoming

I'm so sad, I wish I could wear outfits like these and also have enough confidence and beauty to pull it off. I'm so sick of wearing jeans, oversized clothes and jackets to hide my chubby body every day.

In the city I live in, Japanese and Korean fashion is very well known and I see people like the girl in the picture every day and each one of them look like actual models and I cannot help but feel so incredibly jealous like an absolute pathetic fuck.

I started dieting this summer and I lost some weight which gave me such an incredible confidence boost, but then I fell back into my unhealthy eating habits again all thanks to the abuse I face at home and now there is still a long way to go. Immediately back to square one.

I'm also kinda tan so I'm even considering buying those nasty face masks that bleach your skin a paler shade but cannot find them anywhere IRL.

My envy for people who can wear stuff like this and look so incredibly good while doing so is so, so big.

No. 487560

Why are you even replying to my vent? Like why did this short innocent silly shitpost out of all the long ass posts caught your interest the most? Let me be, I'm just a lonely retarded autist and I bet I'm older than you since I'm spoilt milk.

No. 487562

Honestly anon, there is nothing special about the outfit you posted. I know it’s being modeled on a thin asian girl, but nothing about it stands out as something really j or k-fashiony. It’s not really girly or frilly, I think you could pull off an outfit like that without being stick thin.

And you definitely don’t need to lighten your skin. I think you need to detox from asian fashion accounts on social media because they might be warping your self perception.

No. 487567

Tell me more. Why did you settle for a normie?

No. 487572

>you need to detox from asian fashion accounts on social media because they might be warping your self perception
Anon, THIS. You're on your best way to develop an eating disorder if you don't detach yourself from unrealistic beauty standards on social media. Become fit, healthy and beautiful in your own way. If you aren't a petite asian by genetics, no amount of dieting will make you one.

No. 487573

>jeans and oversize clothes
Less is more when you're bigger anon. I know those choices feel safe, but you're actually adding bulk and-let's be real-everyone can see what your body is regardless of how you attempt to hide it.

I know you might not be able to wear the waist high shorts like in your picture, but you could get a similar silhouette with a cute a line skirt and top. If you're self conscious about your legs, opt for some smooth and slimming control top black tights.

But please don't bleach your skin. I'm sure your skin is very pretty on its own.

No. 487574

ghosting=/= growing apart and whining about it on fb is definitely cringe but also like you must see how either one is painful, no? you say you are desensitized to people dropping you but surely you must remember how you felt the first times it happened? also why couldn't an elementary school teacher and a edm dj be friends? people are more than their professions. yeah, indirectly trying to guilt trip someone for not wanting to be friends anymore is not cool but understand the edm dj bitch too, she obviously liked being friends with the teacher.

don't fall for the skin bleaching meme anon, wtf. 1stly, works very marginally at best, 2ndly, looking sickly pale isn't cute. furthermore, tan is kinda optically slimming too!
also you'd need to be a considerable hamplanet for a short and shirt combo to look so obscene that people notice or remember. trust me, people don't even notice most people on the street, a chubby girl wearing cutesy clothes would garner next to no malicious attention, better than absolute slobtown anyway. also before fawning over asian exchange students dress sense, critically evaluate whether the outfit is actually cute or they're just thin/your weeb tendencies deem them cute looking.

No. 487575

Thanks, it just seems very surreal even though it was expected. It feels weird not to have any grandparents left while most of my friends have all of theirs.

No. 487576

>your weeb tendencies deem them cute looking
I love your writing style

No. 487577

hi anon, good luck on your weight loss journey i think if youre prepared to make your own food this is a helpful blog (has the yt video i watched on it as well) https://liezljayne.com/weight-loss-meal-prep-for-women-1-week-in-1-hour/
she has lots of good videos on her channel with meal plans and recipes so check it out (sadly with clickbait titles that can make it a bit hard to find them again)
anon, im sure your skin complexion is truly gorgeous the way it is, bleaching products are incredibly harmful and permanently damaging to the skin, the other anon is right, take a break from looking at asian fashion its warping your perception. i wish you all the best anon>>482594

No. 487579

>>487557 fellow here, just like other anons said, stay tf away from asian fashion things for a while or all together. Figure out your bodyshape and try to keep emotion out of it, figure out your best qualities bodywise and so on. Youtube has a wide range of different lvls of fat fashion people, it takes a bit of work to find ones with same bodytype or style that you want but use your imagination! I am positively sure you will find a way to feel and look cute, anon! I believe in you.

No. 487580

hi anon, good luck on your weight loss journey i think if youre prepared to make your own food this is a helpful blog (has the yt video i watched on it as well) https://liezljayne.com/weight-loss-meal-prep-for-women-1-week-in-1-hour/
she has lots of good videos on her channel with meal plans and recipes so check it out (sadly with clickbait titles that can make it a bit hard to find them again)
anon, im sure your skin complexion is truly gorgeous the way it is, bleaching products are incredibly harmful and permanently damaging to the skin, the other anon is right, take a break from looking at asian fashion its warping your perception. i wish you all the best anon

No. 487584

File: 1574810014608.jpeg (113.18 KB, 582x555, 073B1B3C-E5D1-4962-986B-D3DC17…)

Not all asian girls are skinny, and those skinny models aren’t usually that thin. Asian fashion brands might abuse photoshop more than western clothing brands.

Try to find girls on social media with a bodytype like yours and look to them for fashion inspiration. You don’t have to be extremely skinny to dress cute. You can be on a weight loss journey and still be fashionable, you don’t have to wait until your body “looks right”. The happier you are with your body and how you look, the easier your weight loss journey will be.

No. 487586

I honestly don't see what makes clothes like that and most clothes under the "asian fashion" label different. It's literally just western clothing, usually styles from the late 80s and 90s.

No. 487589

File: 1574811203092.png (124.96 KB, 512x512, 1566601241444.png)

I applied for a job and I got a call back from HR or the recruiter the next day. They left a message, and asked me to leave a message. So I did that. And now it's been a few days and they haven't called me back or e-mailed me or anything.

Why do they get my hopes up like this? Why does this keep happening?

No. 487590

File: 1574811704021.jpg (29.8 KB, 524x800, ee6c8fa60151c463a2c51f67d20c1e…)

I feel you anon, I absolutely do, I also often have those thoughts (minus the skin bleaching) but the other anons are right. There's something that inevitably looks "korean" about that pic you posted, they all seem to photograph their outfits in a very similar way (which is very trendy right now thanks to kpop) but if you take all that away and put those clothes on a white or black girl when you'd see that they're literally just average clothes. I didn't want to search for a long time, but just try googling black skater skirt + white blouse/shirt and you'll immediately come across dozens of pics of not super skinny, non-asian women who also look cute in it. There's nothing special about it, it's not kboo-ish at all, everybody could wear this.

No. 487591

I need like 30 more pokemons before I finish my pokedex…. WHY CAN'T PEOPLE SURPRISE TRADE ME BETTER THINGS
I mainly give them good stats + shield exclusive. Ggrr

No. 487594

Usually the only elements that makes something korean fashion are how the photo is taken. There’s a specific kind of faux effortless minimalism that’s realky trendy in Korea right now, but the fashion is all just oversized western clothes. It’s all a farce.

No. 487616

Back home for Thanksgiving and while my mom was snacking in her bed, the phone rings and she screams at me to get it. I'm lazy so I don't, then she basically screams "YOU FUCKING BITCH IT'S YOUR GRANDMOTHER" then finally gets off her ass to pick up her phone.

Currently she's talking to her mother in a civilized manner but will probably bitch at me afterwards. As a kid I always had to deal with her just screaming at me to pick up the phone. lol

No. 487628

It fucking sucks. It's a cosmic joke that men and women are meant to be together. The deepest relationship I've had was with a woman, why is it that the sex we're supposed to raise children with is terrible at relationships?

No. 487637

>boyfriend doing nofap
>boyfriend has very high libido
>I have been woken up by him putting his dick inside of me several times now

It just pisses me off because I barely get any sleep as it is and I guess he thinks, since he's not watching porn/jacking off, that my body is his personal flesh light? At first, I was like "whatever." Now, I'm starting to feel dehumanized.

No. 487638

I spent a year finishing my studies in my hometown where all my friends and family lives, saving money by staying with my sister who I get along really well with. I recently moved back in with my boyfriend in another town far away since my studies ended and he got a permanent, well paid job that he enjoys. Problem is - I'm unemployed and this town is small, shitty and not at all as pretty and welcoming as my hometown. I have no friends here, job opportunities are small unless I want to spend two hours on an expensive commute to the nearest big city (which I'm currently applying for jobs in), as opposed to my hometown where busses and trains are close by, plus if I'm lucky I could either bicycle or walk to work.

I'm going home to visit my family for Christmas and I'm sincerely considering just staying there. I don't own more than what can fit in a suitcase anyway. My boyfriend lived in the apartment before me and filled it with all his stuff, so I basically just brought my clothes and my laptop here.

I feel so stupid. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I love my boyfriend, he's a great guy and I missed him dearly while we were apart, but not as much as I'm now missing my friends and family and a sense of being independent. Despite being a broke student and living with my sister, I still had a sense of freedom. What makes it even harder is that my family and friends all express how much they miss me and are looking for jobs for me so I can move back.

I've been with my boyfriend for eight years. He keeps encouraging me assuring me that I will eventually get a job and that our lives here will be good.

I think what I hate the most is that he's so happy to have me back. He keeps telling me how being apart this one year was horrible for him and how he can't imagine a future without me, while I wouldn't mind if we had just stayed in a long distance relationship. I'm so afraid of making yet another stupid decision, yet the more I longer, the more it will hurt.

I'm such a mess.

No. 487639

Honestly anon my dad talks to me like this too and I’m really sorry you have to deal with that. It’s bullshit.

No. 487641

my boyfriend randomly gets so moody for no reason, gets snarky with me, then when i ask what's wrong just won't talk to me.
every time after a few hours/day of this he apologizes but it just wears on me so much, at first i understood a bit because he's very stressed with school and has super difficult classes atm but it just happens so often and when he doesn't even have a lot of schoolwork that i'm becoming incredibly frustrated with him despite him being great otherwise.

No. 487642

There's a word for that…

No. 487643

Girl, you need to have a serious talk with him and start putting out ultimatums. You’re being assaulted.

No. 487644

that is NOT okay. he doesn't respect you if he's doing that.

right? one that starts with "R"

No. 487646

Let me guess he laments the no fap November decision because he’s just sooo horny all the time

High libido isn’t an excuse for using someone’s body when they’re incapable of consenting (unconscious). Unless you’ve negotiated that into the relationship (bdsmfagging), holy fucking shit you deserve better than assault

No. 487652

my friend seems obsessed with the idea that i HAVE to find myself beautiful. i've had an ED and pretty severe body dysmorphia for awhile and i'm starting to come to terms with it in that i'm never going to be a physically beautiful person, but i can be very smart and kind and dedicated etc. and those things make me good

am i wrong to be pissed off that she continues to insist that i see myself as physically beautiful? i'm trying to remove myself from that as much as possible and it's just frustrating to hear her reference my physical appearance as often as she can

No. 487655

Nope, not wrong of you to want people to not focus on your appearance. Set some boundaries, you shouldn’t have to feel uncomfortable around her.

No. 487656

all of that sounds so stressful and horrific, I can only imagine the impact that must have had on your mental health growing up. hugs you're strong anon.

No. 487657

Call them back again. Persist!

No. 487658

I miss the times when if girls wanted to be sluts they would just get it on in private or bang dudes at parties and brag about it, I hate that in the age of the internet they have to get attention and pander to every.single.male. Is it not enough that the guys you fuck see you naked? Every dude on the internet has to too?

No. 487661

I did that to another recruiter and they never picked up. Someone else told me I was annoying them by spamming their phone… by calling them once a day and showing up in their call history. I honestly don't know what the polite thing to do is when you think you might be ghosted by a potential job.

No. 487663

I’ve recently overcome my problems

No. 487664

File: 1574825501536.jpeg (24.31 KB, 257x257, 3F0B2479-CC4F-4B8F-93A4-CA98FA…)

I can’t stop thinking about self harming despite not doing it for years and it’s killing me

No. 487666

He's missing the point of nofap. It's not so much about stopping masturbation, it's about breaking porn addiction and learning how to have a healthy attitude towards sex. If all he's doing is getting so horny that he rapes his girlfriend then he's doing it wrong. Don't put up with this complete bullshit. You deserve better than a man who either faps to porn or sexually assaults you.

No. 487667

I had a wise lady once tell younger me that the urges will never go away completely but you can get better at dealing with them in constructive ways. I prefer distracting myself when I get the urge to self harm, but reaching out for support is probably better. Meh, whatever works for you, I believe in you anon!

No. 487670

That’s really kind of you anon! Not many people understand self harm. I really don’t have many people to talk to about it though

No. 487673

My bf called me too emotional and it feels like it's time for me to drop him. I think from this point on it's just going to be him finding ways to invalidate how I feel because I'm too emotional and he's so ~logical~

Watch out when a guy says this because most of the time he's shaming you for having standards and wanting to be treated well.

No. 487674

Talk to her about body neutrality and tell her that’s a better concept for you on your recovery journey than body positivity.

No. 487676

I feel ya, it can be a taboo topic for sure (which totally sucks if part of your self harming was a response to shame). Maybe a mental health/peer support forum or online community, or maybe a crisis phone line would be helpful? If you have a local crisis line they can often point you in the direction of more relevant resources. Im blessed with access to therapy and have noticed that people who are up to date with mental health can be super understanding. Not everyone knows what to say, but sometimes it’s just about finding someone to listen. I also love doing something physical, like running or working out (for racing thoughts) or bathing and using smelly lotions (when I’m down on myself). Kill it with kindness, lol, fake it till you make it! Whatever you decide to do to keep yourself safe, I just wanted to share that you’re not alone when it comes to struggling with those kinds of thoughts.

No. 487679

Due to years of depression and not taking care of myself during it I had to get four teeth pulled; two of which were front teeth. At first I was extremely anxious about it but now that its been done and over with it, I don't really mind. I have a bit of a lisp now; which I don't care about unless I'm teased about it a bunch. The only time I've cried over it was when I had some people at a sandwich shop looking at me like I was disgusting for it? At first I thought maybe I was exaggerating so I walked away and the next time I looked back they were still staring at me and giving me this disgusted look. I legit went home and cried because of how shitty I felt. Now I'm over it and feel stupid for crying over it.

Inb4 someone asks why I don't get like fake teeth or whatever to hide the gap; I cannot afford it; so I'm just living with it being visible at this point lol.

Also due to how badly stressed I am, my hair is thinning out to the point where I'm getting a wig and I feel really dumb that I can't handle the stress (and my stressor is always nearby since its a family member and I can't leave due to no job/can't work due to severe anxiety.)

No. 487682

hi anon, i totally empathize. i think all of us that go through tough times with depression and not being able to care for ourselves understand. i'm glad you aren't too upset about it. either way, even if you wanted to get implants, you can't do it immediately after getting pulled. as long as you have your health beyond it, that's what matters, and implants are easier now, easier to save for, etc. cosmetic doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. i'm just glad you have your health otherwise. i hope you're able to take care of yourself a little better now. i'm struggling in a similar way and i totally get it. you sound really cool and levelheaded though.

No. 487689

sent a picture of me in a bra to a guy i've been talking to for a few months. first he says i should wear two bras and then when i say something about barely wearing bras at all he says "i believe it" like he's implying my boobs are saggy or something? i consider my boobs to be nice and i don't have any insecurity about them, i just feel really stupid for having sent photos to someone who turned out to be such a jerk. and i've been wasting so much time talking to him too. men are really the worst.

No. 487691

Ew yeah anon, it is never worth it to send those types of pictures to men. I never have. I do ask them for pictures in specific poses if they're attractive (not dick pics). It's also hilarious if they get buttblasted when I don't send any back. As of they're entitled to them. Men should be putting themselves out there for us, not the other way around.

Don't let yourself be vulnerable as shitty men will take advantage of it. They get free pics to jerk off to while they disrespect you the entire time. What do you get from it?

No. 487694

i mean, i got months worth of conversation when I would otherwise have been bored. sadly all that time is now down the toilet because he's a dick, but i wouldn't say i got nothing from it.

No. 487700

I haven't had a "friend date" in a long time and I'm meeting someone tomorrow. I've pretty much only hung out with my tight circle for the past couple years and I'm so ridiculously anxious for how small of a deal it is to hang out with a new person. Like the idea of going to a job interview seems less stressful to me in comparison. I know it's dumb but I hope I'm over it in the morning. I guess my body just is really dedicated to making a good first impression.

I guess I'm also annoyed because I hung out with some old friends recently and found out an ex-friend of mine is still talking shit behind my back. like multiple people who have gone on dates with them say they are still talking about me. spanning years.

also I discovered they were a straight up pathological liar as our friendship fell apart so it totally psychs me out to know my name is in their mouth but I asked both times to be spared any details because I don't want to obsess over it. i haven't done anything about it but it still grinds my gears because I feel like trying to defend rumors just makes them worse.

I have a feeling though this friend date will be ok and typing this did make me feel a little lighter. enjoy my angst.

No. 487706

I lost all my grandparents by age 10. It’s tough. Sorry for your loss anon.

No. 487707

You mean he's asleep right?

No. 487717

I hate when people are willfully obtuse, but frame it as if they're being cautious of ambiguity in a given situation. Skepticism and open-mindedness are both good, but some people just take it way too far.
You could show a clip of a guy in red attacking a guy in yellow while verbally abusing him and hinting at why he's doing it, and the types of people I'm talking about would be like "Uhh, maybe the guy in red didn't realize he was actually beating up the guy in yellow? He could've been half-asleep, and thought he was just peeling a giant banana or something. Maybe he's not even hitting him that hard, and the guy in yellow just has a nosebleed and pukes up blood when he's excited. The video cuts out mid-punch. Maybe the guy in red immediately woke up and realized what he did, apologized, paid the guy's hospital bills, and they're friends now. We don't know the full story, guys. Don't be so quick to call everything assault".
They lean on the most unlikely excuses to obscure what's obvious, then accuse everybody else of being too pessimistic or quick to jump to conclusions.
I can tell part of it is just not wanting to believe people or society can be that bad or insane, but they're unwittingly letting people who do bad things get away scott free.
Like…Not everything is "just one big misunderstanding". Sometimes, shit just happens in broad daylight. That's how it is.

No. 487718

Thank you for your reply and your kind words, anon! A lot of the triggers I have to wanting to do it is do to a lot of my childhood trauma(I.e being sexually abused and abused by my mother), which I cannot talk about because feeling shameful about it all. I’m going to talk to a crisis line the next time I’m feeling out of control though!

No. 487740

>talk to crisis line
>they make fun of me and say bye and hang up

and i can relate, what helps for me is to draw with crayola pens on my skin and then the urge goes away.

No. 487747

I hate the way my mother acts when she thinks I’m lying. She laughs at me and acts as if I‘m still hiding something even when I’m telling the whole truth. I end up nervous laughing because I just can’t conceive that she still doesn’t believe me and she sees that as evidence that I’m lying.
And if I get irritated/start crying because I can’t take that anymore, she says my behaviour is ridiculous and dumb.
She doesn’t act abusive or anything like this normally, but GOD I hate this. She does that since I was a kid.

No. 487757

This is a normal/necessary step for your recovery, anon, I'm proud of you! You need to lay down a boundary here and tell your friend that it's flattering that she thinks you're beautiful, but that this is something you only want to discuss with your therapist/doctor/support group/etc. and that if she respects you she'll stop bringing it up.
Good luck, anon! You deserve friends who support and uplift you!

No. 487758

I need to go to the gynecologist bc I have period cramps from hell but I have