File: 1701966567004.jpeg (788.19 KB, 1048x1162, IMG_8366.jpeg)
No. 1802587
>>1802561i hate my brother too
nonnie. sad
No. 1802611
>>1802605I'd stop talking to him, he sounds like a fuckhead. I'm sorry you've had to deal with them both.
Better yet "oh maybe she's trying to absolve her guilt for all those times she abused me, by helping wipe old people ass eh?"
>>1802608>>1802610Sad, I just ignore it but it happens pretty much everyday. I wonder if it's the same nona that's on at the same time as me or if there's really that many cranky pants
No. 1802624
>>1802613You're probably right.
I'm big on self reflection and usually if you're pushing bitterness out into the world, you're fairly miserable inside.
If they are the miserable ones I'd like to think in time or by reading my post here they might stop and reflect inwards and maybe try to stop that habit of lashing out or being catty. Not only to stop being mean to other anons but more so for themselves because it's a good step to self betterment and having a more mentally happier life.
No. 1802643
>>1802637It'd be interesting to see if they've been here for years or if they're just passers by.
You're doing gods work by uplift posting nona!
No. 1802648
File: 1701972248115.png (6.39 KB, 186x154, images.png)
Already had to spoonfeed my sister Christmas gift ideas for our mum because she couldn't possibly think of anything herself, now I just found out she stole the gift I told her I was getting for our dad a couple days ago fully knowing he's hard to shop for and this was the only thing I could think of that he'd actually appreciate and she doesn't seem to get why I'm pissed off. Like maybe if she paid attention to the people around her instead of constantly going out with and texting her new nigel, she'd be able to come up with things herself instead of relying on me to do it for her. Guess it's back to the drawing board…
No. 1802675
File: 1701973153987.jpg (24.45 KB, 625x345, 331a3b87e4ce2134b82d30b82238a5…)
>>1802613haha weirdly enough i've never thought of this before and it makes everything make sense. can't imagine enforcing 238492 speech filters on myself because of friendships with a bunch of queerio zoomers who have never even had a job.
No. 1802915
File: 1701982185348.jpg (31.6 KB, 736x736, 865b3778c1df1d0ebaa0ca72f1c2cd…)
>>1802824>>1802756I went to a good business school. Group work was still hell. I used to forward professors the shit tier work group members would send me and let him know that henceforth it was all my effort fixing and creating my final product. I had a reputation as a bitch for also not letting people present slides they didn't make. You don't get to "umm uhh yeah so…" read off of my slides and act like you're participating. I had a football player in my 2 person project and he used the excuse that he had ringworm to not do any work. I had a high enough grade (99%) to sustain the fallout of not doing any work either so I told him I was on my period and was also too tired. He left the message on read and submitted nothing. He slipped to a D in the class and had to go on academic probation for his athletic scholarship.
No. 1802924
>>1802915damn nona i like you
>I used to forward professors the shit tier work group members would send me and let him know that henceforth it was all my effort fixing and creating my final productnext time that happens to me i'm doing that as well, genius idea
No. 1802938
>>1802925Please dont kill yourself. I have issues with tone too and I dont think if it's autism or what. I try to come off as nice to people, but apparently my tone and RBF are extremely off putting. I just want to find a job where I dont have to deal with people face off anymore. You are worth more than you think,
nonnie. Don't give up
No. 1802940
>>1802915when
>>1802824 happened i sent her my new and improved slides and sent in the email a list of about ten bullet points of everything i changed for some documentation on what i changed and i felt like a bitch because i kept reiterating why it was important that it's the way i did it and not the other group members. it's insane how people don't even fucking look for spelling/grammar errors and make their slides' composition look like shit.
No. 1802960
File: 1701983859328.jpg (25.65 KB, 300x300, 56pp3feheacz.jpg)
>piece of shit father is sick just like he deserves
>I unfortunately live with my parents because of the crazy rent prices
>everyone is freaking out, sisters won't stop coming home almost everyday to see him so no more privacy
>working from home as often as possible because I have to avoid getting sick while commuting to not straight kill my now almost dying father
>retarded family doesn't understand that, I'm on the phone with clients and coworkers often, they yell, call me loudly from across the apartment, bang on my door every single time I'm talking to someone even though I tell them to shut up beforehand
>can't work properly from the office either because of that one guy who yells all the time, interrupts me and finds occasions to talk to me and disrupt my work because… because. I don't know I think he's bored and not as overworked as I am I complained to a friend about it and she was like "maybe he likes you" so pray for me that it's not the case, he's so hideous he looks like a featherless bird
>retarded piece of shit cousin came today for the whole weekend, I'm not told about it until she's already there in her pajamas in the kitchen
>sick because of my period but will be forced to go to the office because she'll work from our home
>will probably be stuck in traffic because there's a huge festival with crazy tourists who don't know how to behave, subways will be overcrowded, the bus will be very slow because of the shit ton of cars on the road, I'll absolutely stain my pants with blood in public because of this
>always tired no matter what
>can't sleep when I'm tired because everyone is loud until midnight at best
>will be forced to go shopping during said overcrowded, dangerous event because of some secret santa bs at the office on Monday and some forced team bonding event
>worrying about some potential terrorist attacks happening there because it's been a possibility ever since the Paris terrorist attack in 2015 and the one in Nice soon after but the city cares too much about money to let us commute after school and work normally anymore
>no more wifi on my laptop specifically right now
No. 1802997
File: 1701985233895.gif (526.13 KB, 500x300, IMG_9019.gif)
My mom constantly talks to me in this really fake saccharine tone of voice. She always delays her responses a little (like she needs to plan them and make them sound sweet enough) and it doesn't feel like she listens to what I say at all. I feel like she underestimates me and treats me like a child in the guise of being nice and loving.
I think the true reason I have such an extreme aversion to what I perceive as "fake niceness" is because deep down I know my mother is entirely fake. It's kind of hard to swallow, because that means I have zero parents that are emotionally healthy or know how to love me. And zero people in the world that love or like me.
My parents deprived me of an extended family or a community anyway, they moved me around so much as a kid while neglecting me for my coddled autist brother that I never stood a chance. I developed depression and social anxiety so early that I never even managed to start to learn how to make lasting friendships. I gave up on that even before the bullying started because I knew I'd move after a year or two anyway.
The truth is, my only social connection in this world is my mother who refuses to drop her false persona - except when she is angry at me, when the fairy voice instantly disappears and the low ice cold one appears. Suddenly, her responses aren't delayed at all. I realize that her ditziness and the lag I experience in "conversations" with her don't have an innocent explanation like she's eccentric or a bit stupid. No, it's a shell. Her real self appears when she hates me.
I always had a fear as a kid that I'd be told all the awful things about me if I ever spoke up or disagreed with mom. I used to think that fear was unfounded, where did it come from anyway? But I knew. Just because I never triggered her (I was so neglected that I spent 99% of my childhood inside my room) it didn't mean the "sweet" mom I had was ever real, and I could always sense it.
No. 1803011
File: 1701986009394.png (586.35 KB, 746x712, funny gygas cat lol.png)
My porn addiction is back. My bf came to visit me a month ago, we had sex. But I can only think about that time he went to a brothel before we met each other, because he thought no one would ever be with him. I'm tired. I'm doing this out of self hate, I look up prostitution and street walkers and brothels with red and green rooms because I hate myself, I'm hurting myself. He sometimes sends me money because I'm poor and so I feel like a prostitute. I tell him I'm a whore. He says I'm not. I tell him if we get married I would just be a live in prostitute. He tells me that's not real and to stop saying that sort of stuff. He knows I hate porn, he knows I'm anti prostitution. I'm doing all of this out of desperation and self hate. Without him I have nothing.
Please don't be mean to me right now. I know it's easy, and I'm an easy target. But I legit feel like I want to kill myself, or at least I have the constant intrusive thoughts about killing myself everyday. I need to get rid of these intrusive thoughts but I don't know how. It's not just simply dumping him, at this point I think I need therapy or a way to manage my brain.
No. 1803141
>>1803133Lol, they're exactly like this. As a kid I'd cry myself to sleep and they'd just pretend everything was fine, even now if I have some sort of breakdown I get ignored or berated for being mean and evil. I had obvious mental health issues even before puberty, they just put me on ssris and left me to my own devices
I am in fact going insane. I want to shake her and scream "talk to me like a person DROP THE ACT I'M NOT RETARDED"
Facing the reality that I fucking hate my family is difficult both because it feels like I have no real reason to and that I can barely take care of myself or be independent (not gonna blame my parents for everything here BUT)
No. 1803148
>>1803133>>1803141Also the maniacal frantic humming and singing every time there's silence. That alone is driving me
literally insane and if I keep living at home I will actually snap
What mental illness causes someone to fill every quiet moment with high pitched songs, sighing and moaning or occasional coughing. I don't get it.
No. 1803335
>>1803273Thank you nona.
Acknowledging that neglect like that is actually abuse definitely hurts, but it's probably true. My brain still thinks I'm spoiled and worthless, it doesn't help that my mom often seems to subtly imply that since I didn't have it as bad as her (in many ways I'm a lot worse off actually) I'm overreacting and feeling sorry for myself and should be medicated again for being crazy and having actual human emotions on occasion
I remember wishing I could have actual fights and even screaming instead of the cold dead fish "parenting" I had, sometimes. I'm somewhat envious of people who can talk to their parents with neither of them walking on eggshells and trying to control the other's every emotion. Like, fuck, the stiff play-acting is so incredibly exhausting. I can't deal. Enough of society is already about putting on an act, you're telling me I can't even exist as I am around the people who were supposed to love me unconditionally?
I can feel my mother's love dry up as soon as I
trigger her by, for example, being in emotional pain and falling silent. I remember when she just stared at me with ice cold hatred in her eyes, it's so jarring to experience from someone who spends 95% of their time doing the most to appear super warm and loving. Absolutely disgusting.
I'm having a realization about all this so I'm kind of ranting a lot. I keep flipping between "I'm a horrible person, she's done so much for me and is just trying to hide her sadness" and "holy fuck my parents completely failed me and my mother will never tolerate real expressions of emotion or any true intimacy even with her own children"
No. 1803339
>>1803335I was so convinced when I was put in the psychiatric system as a kid that the sense of not being able to be myself even around my family was "social anxiety", it was just a
toxic home. It was never me being defective or autistic or shy, I knew it wasn't safe and I wasn't given any tools at all to grow into a real person.
No. 1803471
File: 1702012455663.jpg (23.34 KB, 236x177, IMG_2986.JPG)
>>1803466>2 autistic 2 befriend women>2 female 2 befriend meniktf nonners. i mostly stick to my autistic bf and online lolcow friends
No. 1803564
>>1803557Is it a boil or a cyst?
I had a bartholian cyst 10 years ago and it was fucked, insane amount of pain. Godspeed nona
No. 1803826
File: 1702035032000.jpeg (102.62 KB, 874x1086, 3C2764E9-3C19-41A9-86CD-06055E…)
>>1803781Use him as your bitch tbh. Say you didn’t want to wear the outfit because it looks better on him and have him send photos to use as blackmail later. You should also try and network your way into a new friend group just incase this one implodes with drama soon
No. 1803854
File: 1702037847194.gif (441.16 KB, 335x425, menacing_grin_grinch.gif)
>>1803826Some of you are so weirdly strategic regarding fucking up your enemies. I love it
No. 1803877
File: 1702040356177.jpg (250.08 KB, 1069x458, 1000011103.jpg)
Had the most awkward dinner ever last night because I rejected a guy who I had been seeing for several months.
Early on he wanted to handhold over the table which..lol nope. Tbh even if I was into him I think that sort of shit is annoying for men to do sometimes, like holy fuck can't you just sit across the table from me for an hour without trying to snog??? Of course that opened up a can of worms so he began his prying and questioning into why I didn't want to do that, "what's on my mind," etc.
I was truthful-yet kind-and it emotionally destroyed him. He excused himself to the bathroom to obviously go cry a bit. We were already on a long break of sorts and I hadn't fucked him in months. He really had hope I would give him a title.
I brought his Christmas presents and tried to make dinner less awkward by changing the subject and making light conversation but he brooded and barely ate his food.
In the parking lot afterwards he asked for hugs, and each time he would attempt to headlock me with his arms for eye contact/kissing LOL NOPE. He could not suffer to let go, but at least he eventually did.
Thank fuck this is over. He's too pathetic. I even deleted all his spy-friends from my shit since he confessed recently that they didn't like me anyway from all the badmouthing he had done about me for not making him my bf.
No. 1803918
File: 1702043135583.png (31.07 KB, 189x198, 26c3f9b3b109d05485dfdc77beb577…)
anytime someone calls me beautiful or deserving of a good partner i get reminded how i'm actually an irremediable disgusting human being that can't feel sexual desire from love and i would never torture someone into spending their lifetime with me as celibates and i hate myself for being so deceitful, i'm sorry i don't have warning signs all over my skin please don't put your idea of me beside any other person and treat me like i am an undefined creature until i forget this side of me again whether you're someone close to me or a stranger, show appreciation or wish things like that to someone who actually deserves it
No. 1803952
File: 1702046079519.jpeg (48.08 KB, 290x290, IMG_5907.jpeg)
my ex doesn't have the dead eyes coomer stare that most moids have and i hate him for it. it's still a blank stare, but has more soul than any moid i know. his eyes are really pretty actually, and he gets compliments from other women often.
the other moid i used to fuck had a completely dead glare and it checks out, he was abusive and probably he'll be schizophrenic in less than 10 years. having an abusive father always mind breaks moids in the worse ways
No. 1803956
File: 1702046398134.jpg (9.99 KB, 297x169, 1000011110.jpg)
Mom is retired and temporarily worked at a dollar store for extra money. Well that brand's computer software company send out letters about a security breach that happened 4 months ago which has spiraled her into geriatric alarm mode.
There's little information out about it so far. I wish she would just do the sensible thing and put credit alerts on her stuff and wait for more info on the situation. Instead she's audibly flustering and fussing that rando call center agents don't know shit and cannot reassure her that everything is gonna be okay.
Is this what we will be like when we are old? Stubborn and bullheaded to our own detriment?
No. 1803982
File: 1702047710005.jpeg (28.97 KB, 250x320, B926DFD2-565D-47DD-BEC0-FA1E22…)
>>1803967You’re right, I totally was lax about my water consumption yesterday. Still going to quit though just to prove to myself I can, then once the shackles are off and my pact with this demon complete I can maybe start having one every now and then. Idk, I’ve had more addictive better high stuff and quit like it was nothing but that’s all small easily ignored potatoes in comparison to my insatiable desire for coffee. It’s just not worth the withdrawals when I can’t get my fix.
No. 1803987
>>1803968Thank you nona… i agree there and don't worry i'm doing good!
But unfortunately my issue is just that i have a warped brain and i can't have sex with someone i love but i don't want to have sex with somoene i don't love either.
I'm actually a sexual person but i have very bad fetishes and all of that so i wouldn't want to put anyone i love in that setting or see them in that way, i wish i was just normal but i really can't change it, and it is so hard to carry a sexless relationship when your partner finds you attractive i guess.
Now i understand myself better and i would totally be open and clear about it but at this point i prefer to avoid any relationship, it's not like i've ever looked for one anyway but when someone is nice to me it makes me so insecure.
No. 1803989
>>1803986You got this,
nonnie. Hang in there.
No. 1804051
>>1804002Is it actually a perverted book anon? I don't know which is why I ask.
Personally, I don't think it would be harming anyone innocent and it might give valuable insight to sexually active teens who need it. Most teachers will tell you that many students are sexually active and talking about sex with their peers by middle school. Some complain that after the pandemic, even elementary age kids have been exposed to pornography because their shitty parents handed them a tablet all day. Relying on parents clearly isn't working anymore, what can be done to educate them and when?
No. 1804085
File: 1702054407220.jpg (21.48 KB, 563x538, cry cat.jpg)
I stepped in shit 2 days in a row, just my luck.
No. 1804192
>>1804166It’s not just you anon. It’s in general. They’re people with too much moral flexibility and not a strong sense of self. They want to do “the right thing” and feel like good people, so they promise empathy and emotional support they are incapable of providing. Then they actually have to provide that support and it feels hard and bad and difficult etc and they simply don’t want to because it only felt good when they were getting praised for the potential good.
It’s not you, it’s them. They’re surface level people, with surface level relationships and think nice and good are the same thing, but nice is easy. Good is not.
No. 1804203
>>1804166People just want brownie points for presenting as good people but don't actually want to put in the work when it comes down to the wire.
People are jerks. I've had that shit said to me by a BPD ex (specifically the "I'M NOT YOUR THERAPIST!!!") and it was alllllll projection since I tend to keep emotions to myself and he was the unstable one constantly needing reassurances. Except when I was in need, I could go get fucked since I was killing le vibe.
Don't beat yourself up.
No. 1804233
File: 1702062502073.jpeg (25.94 KB, 818x568, 1684828200171.jpeg)
I keep getting fucking detained and sent to secondary inspection at the US border (at LAX of all places). I know my stays are long but I always have every proof in the world that I have savings, a job back home and no employment here whatsoever. It was the 3rd time this happens and it was particularly tedious, they held me for 4 hours with 40 or so people in the waiting room where all the seat rows somehow face one another, the lights are really bright, there's no clocks and if you take out your phone they grab it and send your passport to the back of the pile. I couldn't even warn my friend not to come pick me up yet and she was frantically calling me. Everyone in the room was almost always ESL/non-English speakers. Some of them had no idea why they were here and were distressed or breaking down. There was this Ukrainian couple who had a thousand yard stare and eyes red like they'd been up for days, trying to get water for their kids while waiting, I saw their officers go in and out until finally telling them they could stay for 2 years, when they woke up their exhausted little boy who looked so scared. I was worried sick myself that I was gonna be sent back but seeing all the human misery in this room was pure doom fuel, especially when the officers talk to everyone like fucking glacial, aggro sociopaths.
When they finally called me up I was in such a state of exhaustion and migraine, thankfully I'd been through this before so I knew their tricks to try and get you to lie or contradict yourself even if you're being truthful. They still asked me to put my phone face up and log into all my bank accounts, show my tax filings, government aid, spendings since last year. They let me in but I'm seriously so fucking sick of CBP and being detained for interrogation every time I come here. They should somehow have figured out by now I'm not a threat nor seeking employment here. I get anxiety attacks thinking about next time now and I can't stop thinking about the women in this room who were alone and visibly distressed.
No. 1804366
>>1804348Same
nonny, everyone is so shitty
>>1804335Men love ruining themselves like that huh
No. 1804456
>>1804448Don't be embarrassed just tell everyone you work out so hard and you are so proud of it lol
and maybe don't wear those again if you don't want to but this has been me before accidentally kek no one like… REALLY cares.
No. 1804459
>>1804456Thank you
nonnie, I did walk ungodly distances in those shoes heh
No. 1804472
File: 1702079911162.jpeg (27.91 KB, 320x320, 5x8-Nonnie-My-Best-Friend-Hydr…)
>>1804462Thank you, I love you, you already made me feel a little better.
No. 1804489
File: 1702080745345.jpg (102.28 KB, 960x960, 62szh8ji7we51.jpg)
They keep leaving me messages, I ignore them but it stresses me out because they deserve someone better. I can't move on myself if they haven't either. How many hints does it take?
>>1804471I thought that answering scam calls was bad because they'd know there's a real person behind the number. Could be someone who gave the wrong number or the previous owner of the number, and in that case you could see if the number is listed on any people search sites. I removed my family from as much of them as I could and we get less unsolicited calls and mail.
https://inteltechniques.com/workbook.html No. 1804518
>>1804286its… really not all its talked up to be
>>1804298yes, this.
No. 1804533
>>1804501>>1804523I'm 24 and i think that i'm kinda normal but i had some younger friends in the recent years and i noticed that they definetly have a different approach at things lol, the bad part is that it rubbed a bit on me but that's just when i'm friendly with someone and now i find very stupid stuff funny.
I wonder if part of the reason why they're like that is actual attention deficit because they're used to faster, shorter and more intense forms of entertainment idk.
No. 1804542
My wisdom tooth is coming through and it hurts so much holy shit
>>1804522I feel you nonna. I'm not crazy short but I can gain 2-3kg and my clothes will fit too small.
No. 1804566
File: 1702086273974.png (303.53 KB, 446x591, 1700579215149.png)
No. 1804611
>>1804604Mine likes meat and probably southern food considering where he was raised.
Aw thanks ily too. I kind of wish there was like a hidden husbando board or something so other nonas won't get annoyed.>>1804607Mine is probably not much better, he's a huge asshole and killed others
No. 1804618
>>1804592What the hell that's so sad.
>>1804602Thanks
nonnie, OT but it's one of the reasons I didn't want to be friends with her anymore. We'd be in the middle on a conversation and she'd say 'oh I have to reply to discord friend #207' and take like 3 hours, they were all from other continents too so they were probably asleep or busy anyway lol. I miss her sometimes but then I remember how it was to be friends with her, it was like talking to a statue but also constantly walking on eggshells. Sorry for the rant, I ended it kind of recently and it still hurts. She was such a funny and unique person when we were younger but over the years social media turned her into a shell of a person.
No. 1804873
Next month I move away from my home town to live with my boyfriend full time. I don’t have much family, but I’m really really close with my mom and I’ve never lived far from her. I see her multiple times a week, we hang out and do stuff on the weekends, I know it’s weird to some people but she’s my absolute best friend in the world and I’m not going to even be living in the same state as her. It’s so hard thinking about it even though it hasn’t happened yet
I always thought I’d be living close by her, that she would be a regular part of my children’s lives, that I’d always be right there if she needed me when she got older. But my boyfriend has his expensive house, and his well paying job, and all of his family. I work from home and it wouldn’t make sense for him to give up everything he has there to move here. He also lives in an incredibly expensive area, I’ll never be able to afford to move my mom closer to him. Houses anywhere even close to his house are a million+ now. I just have to accept she’s going to be states away for the rest of my life if I want to be with him. It’s so hard, I love him so much and I know I need to start my own family, I just never imagined I would have to be so far from my mom so it’s taking a lot of getting used to
I’m supposed to be a grown ass woman but I feel like a scared little girl right now. I’m all that she had, I feel so guilty
No. 1804920
I remember being a teenager and writing almost daily in my diary about what I was going to do with my life as soon as I was an adult. By the time I actually made it to 18 I was already deep in addiction, homelessness, mental illness, and prostitution. Took me years to get over the traumas from those things, but now what’s dragging me to the bottom of the sea is how all my opportunities are gone. I missed that window where every door is open and now I just have to deal with where it’s left me. Education is expensive, the only jobs I’m qualified for are massively in demand, only barely staying afloat with debt, etc etc. The only aspect of my life that I feel I’ve done right and brings me happiness is being a wife/mother - but outside of my husband and child I have no drive, no confidence, no direction, nothing for myself, because I spent all the time before them on drugs, craziness, and whoring. I hate it so so so much.
No. 1804931
File: 1702121879674.png (830.18 KB, 881x473, 9149f0adb4680ff38cd462486e3326…)
putting in my one week today at starbucks (because i go on vacation the week after so i cant put in 2). i have some savings from college until i need to find another job in a couple months. why am i so scared this is a bad choice! this job sucks! nonnies…im a bit nervous but i think the free time before spring semester starts will be good and ill use it to build up clients for my other gig and job search as a back up! i think this might be so good for me!
No. 1805117
File: 1702140216873.jpg (111.58 KB, 500x413, 1659400526275.jpg)
No one wants to work? More like jobs are shady and they don't even get back to you. All i do is job hunt and no one has even give me a text or email back. Why does it have to be this way. Why is america claiming to be a first world nation when I can't even find a fucking job? I'm so exhausted mentally. I am living off savings and the grace that my land lord is holding my bills until I get work again this month. I want to cry
No. 1805123
>>1804448It happens,
nonnie. Just try to have two sneakers for the gym/work out class and wash in between so you dont end up with smelly shoes again. I'm sorry, but I kinda kek'd at someone frebeezing the area.
No. 1805190
File: 1702142908056.gif (266.42 KB, 220x275, cat-grin.gif)
I feel like I'm losing my sanity. There are two-three different dogs barking non stop near my house. I dont know if they are left alone on the patio or what, but they wont shut the fuck up. I hate the sound of dogs barking SO MUCH. They just keep going. You should be allowed to report this shit . Maybe I'm autistic, but I feel like I have a headache made worse because of all the loud barking. It's been going for an hour and i'm trying to cook breakfast.
No. 1805203
>>1805173I feel you nona. I had to buy tires for my car for the first time and had no idea where to start, plus it was an expensive purchase. I looked all over tire review websites and then called a place and the woman kept listing all the tires they had because I had to pick a set before she could even tell me when I could come in to get them put on. By the time I got to ask her if they had Continental she said
>no but we have X Brand 450 ZQ Climate or Y Brand 230 UltraRetard 2.0 orI ended up hanging up. I told her I didn’t want to go over $1000 and she kept giving me tires priced at $1070 for 4 or $1020 for 4. That’s not under $1000… I ended up crying out of frustration after I hung up and deciding to just go with the tires I have on my car already. When you make a big purchase you should get exactly what you want. I hope your new stuff ships soon ♥
No. 1805276
File: 1702144967177.gif (700.58 KB, 220x201, IMG_4242.gif)
I wish I hadn’t been friends with the high achievement students in hs because it’s that time of the year where I run into their parents in stores and find out that they’re all attorneys and doctoral graduates while my dumb ass is making under 30k a year and struggling to earn a BA while working full time
No. 1805292
>>1805276they probably had wealthy parents, strong support systems, their parents knew people in their fields, etc.
whenever i check up on people i went to hs with it's like most of them are doing mediocre barring the few that had a lot of help, either through their parents having mad wealth or them having a lot of friends (strong support system) and etc. etc. etc.
No. 1805455
File: 1702151023945.jpeg (106.35 KB, 1080x830, IMG_0638.jpeg)
I'm going to leave my abusive mom on Monday! I'm sick of her sabotaging my college education, tracking my location, being racist towards my boyfriend, and all-around just treating me like shit. I have most of my important docs except for my birth certificate (which I can reorder easy peasy), and I packed some of my clothes ready to go. I may have to couch surf and live out of my car for a while, but I'm certain I'll be okay eventually. I have a very strong support system. Anywhere is better than being with my mom, I'm scared that she might try to get violent with me soon.
No. 1805481
I gotta stop dressing the way I do. Grow my hair out and stop dyeing it. Get a different style of glasses. I dress too “tomboyish” and the “2014 emo way” which is basically how TIFs dress now. Sigh.
>>1805455Good luck nonna. Stay safe!!
No. 1805511
>>1805190you can report it. noise complaint to the cops or contact your HOA
>>1805475uhh, mono? not really an STD but i got mono when i was a teen and it just lives in your body forever. i had couple flares but never again since i was pretty young. it feels like the flu.
No. 1805518
File: 1702156071931.jpg (158.43 KB, 828x828, 20231130_194351.jpg)
I just realised this so I haven't still worded it out perfectly but I think I am open to men having crushes on me even though I hate them and am a lesbian is because I have no issue treating them like shit for it. I have an idea why people get crushes on me pretty easily and often, but I find them repulsive for it because I am not what they need or actually want and with women I mostly pity them because baby I am so goddamn emotionally unavailable, you don't want to do this and I won't be mean to women but I have no idea how to reject clearly because I've always just been absolutely awful to the men crushing on me, and I say crushing because if they spent even an hour thinking about me and the whys, they'd realise I am not someone they need.
No. 1805625
>>1805538because I remember using condoms to have sex in high school but I found out that those are only like 80% effective for genital diseases/infections
>>1805560Since last night when I remembered that I’ve had sex before
No. 1805755
>>1805322yeah so don't feel too bad. some people just have it all (or have more than you do from the jump). it's not like these people are better than you or even working harder than you lol, it's just that they got lucky enough to be born into good circumstances.
whenever i see someone doing well, 9 times out of 10 it's because they started out in a good home with great parents. probably never had to listen to rats in the walls or walk home from school with the knowledge they'd be getting their ass beat over stupid shit soon as they stepped through the door. shit sucks but what can you do
:( No. 1805875
File: 1702176582711.png (23.8 KB, 275x264, 1697215727603.png)
I get really angry when something I like reaches mainstream popularity and even normies meme about it even though it wasn't like that a few years ago. I'm such a contrarian but I just can't stand new kids in my tree house. I want muh special interests to stay niche or at least to not become super popular in the mainstream and developing cringe fanbase. I hate myself for not being able to simply enjoy things. I don't even understand why something that wasn't popular suddenly becomes super popular and it angers me.
No. 1805886
File: 1702177383487.png (17.11 KB, 620x662, mysadtragiclife.png)
>>1805854samefag for visual aid
No. 1805909
>>1805895>skinny jeans: wore these in high school and they really just put my odd anatomy on full display, they constrict my calves so much they'd give me circulation issues kek>"mom jeans": the high waist is good for my short legs but they make me look like a frumpy mom>cargo style: I actually look good in these but they are not the style I like and have limited application to different outfits>wide leg: I have short legs and not great style (which you need to wear these imo) so these make me look retarded>office/dress pants: I look okay in these for some reason. but they aren't causal enough to ear outside of work>>1805900Yeah, i still think my legs are a bit too short to be conventional, but I know what you're saying. The issue is the styles i desperately want to wear just don't go with my body type at all. I look good in dresses and skirts but haven't worn those in years because I don't like them. I want to dress masculine but it just won't work on my body type, I can't ever seem to accept that though
>>1805889I think you're right, gaining arm muscle would balance me out more. But to be perfectly honest I don't think I will ever find it within myself to do that, i am absolutely a weak nerd type and it takes a lot out of me just to will myself out of bed in the morning. And it seems like it've very hard for women to gain muscle in the arms.
No. 1805917
File: 1702179696862.png (30.89 KB, 531x672, 1702177383487.png)
>>1805854Anon i think you can find stuff that can look cool on you, i have a similar issue but my legs look more like cartoon chicken thighs, i gave up on pants and just wear skirts because i found them more comfortable but in your case i think that maybe you can balance out by putting focus on your torso?
Like wearing a cool open hoodie, maybe sleeves that roll up to your elbow so it can look thicker and such, wearing darker colors on the bottom and lighter ones on the top? I think that pants that have lines on the sides or have two tones can help you but i guess that it all has a modern sporty style if you can roll with it.
No. 1805921
File: 1702180044605.png (469.25 KB, 925x720, 5C3C9926-7BC6-41E4-9265-13311B…)
I’ve hit my limit. Not even in a breakdown way just… done. Can’t be fucked being tolerant anymore. I love my family, my bf etc etc but I’m just so tired. They haven’t even done anything in particular I just want to tear my skin off, scream and run away with my dog.
Literally looking at pet friendly hotels in my city for four or so days over Xmas so I can run away with her for a short time and just decompress before I say or do something I regret. Will cost an arm and a leg but idc, Merry Christmas to me I guess!
No. 1805924
>>1805917ayrt kek thanks anon this is so cute. You are definitely right that this is the style that would look best on me. It just happens that it's the polar opposite of my taste so I would have no idea how to wear it and what matches what even if i wanted to. also feels like false advertising to dress like a sport chad but be mildly disabled and never kicked a sport ball seriously in my life kekkkk
but unfortunately you are 100% correct that objectively this is the way. maybe i have to become a workout person just so i can wear the uniform without shame
No. 1805928
>>1805909>not even listing straight leg relaxed fit jeans??? (it's ok, i just needed to bully you because you're a nerd)
i think
>>1805917 is onto something about cropped jackets though, maybe not the primark/shein tier atrocities you see everywhere, but a quality slightly cropped boxy silhouette might both balance you out and look quite masculine.
No. 1805938
>>1805924You're alright nona, don't worry about how does it make you look in that way, just think about how you can enjoy it yourself.
I've tried to think about other styles but i'm not very good with masculine options, that's why i thought about more modern or sporty kind of clothes, what kind of style of clothes do you like? Colors, prints and materials can also do a lot of difference in how something looks like anyway, you don't have to look necesserly sporty.
No. 1805956
File: 1702182514966.png (334.08 KB, 1189x593, image-1.png)
Nonnies, i apologize in advance for how long this is going to be, but i'm needing to vent very badly, and would quite appreciate any words/tips/advice/retarded calling, here is the only place i can vent, so bear with me, please.
Six years ago i had a small affair with a guy whom i ended up falling for very badly and have feelings towards to this day. He broke up with me because he didn't want to have a long distance relationship, and we agreed to keep being friends.
We stayed in touch all those years, me coping very badly with all of it because of my mental health issues, i always believed i would never find another guy that would treat me well, love me and respect me the way he did, and, after 6 years, i've seen that's actually true. In all these years, i never found someone like him ever again, pretty much the opposite. I was treated very poorly by anyone who claimed to love me and pursue a relationship with me.
Fast forward to last year, after few months without talking to each other, he came back and we started to get close again, just as friends like always i imagined. He was being a sweetheart as he always was to me, and at some point, i made some sort of flirty joke with him, assuming he would understand it as a joke since there was 0 chances of him still liking me in my head, but he took it seriously and started flirting with me. Back then i thought it was jokingly as well so i went along, not wanting to assume he had feelings for me to not suffer anymore with the situation. I ended up stopping replying to him at some point because of the situation i was him (being harassed by one moid and being in a very toxic relationship with another one).
He tried few times to message me after that, but i was in such bad state that i just let it go. Now back to nowadays, i decided to talk to him again, wanting to make up for the shit i did to him, but now i realize what a HUGE DUMB AND RETARDED BITCH I WAS.
I have been having meltdowns whenever i remember how sweet those days were, and how i could have had the man i loved for so long back to me, AND I LET IT SLIP LIKE THAT BECAUSE I'M RETARDED. We are chit chatting nowadays, but it's clear as day he's changed towards me (rightfully) and that only makes me remember more about the past and how much all of this hurts.
I'm still deeply in love with him, he still maked my heart beat like no one else ever did. I plan to come clean with him about my feelings and apologize for what happened, but i honestly don't even feel i have the right to feel love towards him like this anymore.
I can't believe and can't forgive myself for what i did to him, now all i think about is how things would be if i made the right choice back then of staying with him.
I'm tearing all up typing this. Feel free to call me mentally ill retard, dumb bitch, autist, sperg, anything. I deserve it all.
TL;DR: Lost the guy i loved and now my dumbass suffering.
No. 1805974
>>1805956Nona don't call yourself those ways, i don't want to sound like a creep but i honestly wish i was there with you right now.
You weren't being a retard or anything like that for not replying either, you had some hard times and it's not like you did that because you took pleasure in him not hearing from you okay?
I won't lie that usually i don't trust men but you seem to understand what you're talking about and know him well enough, i hope it's not just the positive side he shows.
I guess this will sound blunt, but i don't see why you can't just explain this to him and be honest and clear about it all, i know you feel regret and ashamed but what good thing can happen if you continue to keep it inside and worry about what he might feel or think when he could tell you directly?
No. 1806014
File: 1702187749804.jpg (107.53 KB, 1000x1000, 1683230180636.jpg)
I hate having undiagnosed, undefined mental health problems that I can't fucking explain or have any reasoning for. Only thing I am confirmed to have is autism but this goes beyond that. I wish I knew why I suffered like this. Basically I get horrific images of people I love or myself dying in really brutal, gorey ways. Sometimes I get imgaes of people I trust murdering or torturing me. And I literally don't try to think about these things they just pop into my head and I can't really get them out. I also pick my skin off compulsively to the point I bleed multiple times a day. The only thing I can think is OCD runs in my mom's family but in different manifestations (mostly contamination & checking OCD). I've had this for most of my life but it's getting worse. and I don't think it's normal, the thoughts are really upsetting and honestly horrific. And not only is it mental but I hurt myself so much without being able to stop or even consciously think about it until I see blood or pick enough skin off that it hurts too much to continue. I don't know what to do because it honestly is hard to live this way but I also am too scared to get help. I just wish I understood.
No. 1806038
File: 1702189971026.jpg (48.11 KB, 634x639, 3bf2cb9ca4ecf6c86c97d9bae52e4b…)
My mood was out of wack because I was about to have my period but I was thinking some days ago that the suicidal thoughts I had before my age was even in the double digits were sent from the universe/a divine intervention trying to save me from who I would become. Right in those years when my brain was like play-doh it made me already decide to give up. Then those angels tried harder by hitting me with waves of self destruction and I pissed away all my formative years that I would kill to get back now. But they didn't try hard enough, i'm still kicking motherfuckers AND I've decided it is too late to kill myself anyways!
No. 1806043
File: 1702190444403.png (73.11 KB, 640x410, ADTWO38.png)
I need to stop bottling things up until I get shitty and explode. Because I swear I lose like 50 iq points and just blurt out the dumbest crap
No. 1806065
File: 1702192959727.jpg (49.41 KB, 1024x682, angy.jpg)
>>1806043For me it's the usual Karen shit when my anger doesn't even reach my main sources of frustration, I just happen to release my anger by bumping into someone that blocks the road or leave an angry review somewhere or
I intentionally rile up some very obviously young anons on here No. 1806074
File: 1702194016668.gif (6.34 MB, 640x640, bye.gif)
>>1806065>spoilerOh so that's why every thread is garbage now.
No. 1806088
>>1806065I forgive you
nonny, just take care of that internal rage please
No. 1806105
File: 1702199145486.jpg (5.41 MB, 4032x2439, MTXX_MH20231210_184831010.jpg)
Did a high tea for my grandmother.
Half the stuff didn't get eaten, people just didn't eat anything.. it was lunch time.
Aunt who didn't say yes or no to coming came 20 minutes early and just talktalktalked while I was trying to finish making stuff.
Just stood around but somehow in my way.
There was spare stuff and she said she'll take a plate to my dad and her husband so it "looks like she did something".
Just one of those people who throw money at a problem while saying "oh if you need anything" rather than putting in the effort and work to actually help.
Just a waste of time and money honestly. I won't bother again.
No. 1806183
Very long cringerant ahead, but I really need to blow off the steam. I'm so tired of the way this world operates, I fucking can't, I want to cry. Nonas, you will definitely disagree with me, but I genuinely don't see the point in doing anything else other than housework as it's genuinely the only thing that makes me happy and mentally stable. I don't need some strict schedule or people at all to take care of my house, cook, and all that stuff. Staying at home and having all these micromanagement tasks played a huge role in my overall healing, both mental and physical. It's just nice to roam around stores, picking some shit, going for walks to look for something specific, it's like a game quest. Cleaning my house also has an immediate effect of an accomplishment. Unlike working out, studying something new, you can actually see the effect here and now even if you don't put much effort in it - even during my worst days when I can't even stay awake for longer than five hours, just simply wiping the dust off my table still makes the place overall cleaner. Besides, it's manual physical labor and it's nice and healing to do something tactile, interactive with the environment around me, as opposed to frying my brain with intellectual labor.
It's not like I'm dumb or don't have any talents or desires. I'm pretty much a jack of all trades and can stick my nose into a broad variety of jobs and activities and then dive into something deeper if need. If I'm interested or oddly fixated on something, I can literally go ahead and learn 1-2 year long courses in like, a fucking week or so. At some point I learned a skill on my own that falls under the category of a high-pay profession and if I was working, we could have been considered an upper-class family despite both of us coming from a dirt poor background. That's how much of potential I fucking waste by being a whatever kind of retard I am!
It's not like we need money, I just genuinely feel like shit for not being able to function "normally". I genuinely don't understand how it is physically and even psychically possible to have a scheduled job. I don't understand how is it possible to talk for someone who isn't your friend or a family member longer than few seconds. I don't understand how people live like this, how the fuck do they meet people, how do they even handle these "normal" lives they have. I wanted to drop out of school and missed more than literal half of classes in my high school because it was physically unbearable. I would sleep in a lot and never do my homework, because I literally had no time for this, I would come back home, go to bed, and sleep until the next day, sometimes up to 20 hours. I still managed to be one of top 10 students, it was specifically when I let myself skip school to play video games or sleep or chat online, I started doing better. If I could, I would have asked my parents to switch to homeschooling, but they were far gone alcoholics and didn't care what I do whatsoever. I literally don't believe that everyone else succeeded BECAUSE they were going to school every damn day. At some point I ever reached a psychotic state where I genuinely believed I'm surrounded by fake people, robots, or liars who are as weak as I am, just plot against me for some reason and made up this whole "normal life" thing, which granted me a cluster-A diagnosis. Now I think I was going through stress-induced breakdown and while I don't support self-diagnosing, I suspect I might actually be on some tism spectrum or ADHD, the latter kind of suits me more. But it doesn't matter, I can't get help for any of these here, so whether I have them or not, doesn't matter: at the end of the day I feel like an outcast anyway.
I have art-related passions too. Yesterday I went to sniff out opportunities and just look generally what's up in local game development and artist circles. It was fun, of course. Things that speakers presented were super inspiring, I already pirated a bunch of apps to try out specific things I haven't thought about before. But again, it was all about networking. I was so overwhelmed from speaking to various people there, at the end I thought I'm going to vomit and I went back home to literally fall asleep in my chair. I hate how it all works. I hate how I can't just create content without trying to advertise myself as loud as I can, like, why can't I just sit alone and do my shit whatever way I like and then drop it somewhere and get a pay, like in Stardew Valley. It's draining, it feels wrong, it makes me go insane, and the best thing I managed to pull in my life was being a freelance artist. And I genuinely enjoyed it, minimal communication with a schedule that I set. But even then, if you want a higher pay, your skills don't matter, it's all about connections and hanging out with "cool" people. A lot of people also look down upon commission artists, it's like staying a janitor in your 30s-40s and so on. As if being a janitor is bad… I hate how career grinding mindset is prevalent even among those who claim to be informal and anti-mainstream.
I also don't know how to talk, at least, in short. I always have something to say, something to comment on with my thoughts or memories of a similar experience, but I constantly end up rambling non stop. At the event, I mentioned above, I either had nothing to say, because I couldn't come up with a short sentence or something as simple as introduction of myself, or I was talking non-fucking stop. This wall of text I'm typing is quite literally how I talk IRL, if I know I'm allowed to. People generally like it, especially those who aren't that talkative themselves or those who find topics I talk about interesting, but it can really get in the way. I have trouble initiating dialogues, to be honest, my main strategy of finding people has always been performing some retarded shit for myself and then some would notice that and take interest in it.
What I also learned is that only moids are allowed to be ~mysterious intimidating artists~ nobody talks to. I stumbled across a fair share of those, they just pump out assorted content, often times coomerish, they're praised just for the fact that they exist and people throw money at them. If an artist like that is suspected to be a female (and it's easy as fuck to clock them by art anyway), no amount of gender identity is going to save her from being forgotten, called out for something pointless, and just generally seen as lesser than a scrote counterpart. This is also another aspect of "I hate how this world works", I hate how moids are always prioritized, I'm sick of being seen as lesser just by the virtue of being born with wrong set of chromosomes in the eyes of these people. I hate how art field, even circles that have always been predominantly female, still value men more. I hate it, I fucking hate it, I want to scream, I'm tired of low-effort moids getting more than the most talented and hard-working women I've ever stumbled upon.
No. 1806302
>>1806105That’s so cute! Don’t be so down on it!! That’s how entertaining is sometimes. It was for your grandma right? Did she like it? That’s all that matters.
I think half of that getting eaten by six people for high tea seems about right but maybe I’m crazy.
No. 1806303
>>1806105You mean afternoon tea right?
High tea = dinner
No. 1806315
>>1806183samefag but i read the rest and i relate to you despite that i am somewhat more normal.
>I was so overwhelmed from speaking to various people there, at the end I thought I'm going to vomit and I went back home to literally fall asleep in my chair.I go to class and fall asleep as soon as I get home no matter what the time is because it's exhausting just being around other people.
>This wall of text I'm typing is quite literally how I talk IRL, if I know I'm allowed to.hahaha me too, I have such a bad habit of talking nonstop and going on a bunch of tangents
No. 1806389
File: 1702220410237.png (1.73 MB, 713x912, 1111.png)
>>1806381pls do. i will bring my sunflower tarts ♥
No. 1806448
so i'm the anon who was complaining about the gay faggot situation in one of my uni classes from a few threads back with some more bull. we got into it this friday. i called him out in front of the entire class when he kept interrupting me and being condescending towards me as i was blowing off some steam over some other class i've been having issues with. i told him to his face that i wasn't talking to him, and to stfu and you could see in his face he was shocked (good!). i really wasn't having a good day that friday in particular. it was the last day of classes before finals, and i've been having this terrible back-and-forth with my professor in another class that reached a boiling point friday.
i was pretty certain i was going to fail that class because they kept rejecting all of my ideas for the school magazine, and threw out my final article AGAIN for the paper like the bunch of stuck up assholes that they are. i had actually just sent them a long email cussing them out for dragging me around the bush and not being honest with me about why they kept rejecting my articles and basically told them all to go rot in hell. it was pretty ugly cause i was so, so close to going into the editing room and tearing the whole place up. i also found out that the editor for the magazine basically set me up to fail by withholding important information from me, so obviously i was not in a good place to have some pretentious gay moid talking down to me while i am trying not to set the entire university on fire.
and tbh, i don't feel bad about it at all. our professor got mad at me but i really did not care and still do not care. i just left the class as she kept screaming at me to apologize to him and that i was being mean to him. i just told her, what should i apologize for? i wasn't talking to him. he doesn't know what he's talking about, and wasn't trying to help me. he was being condescending and talking to me like i am some ingrate who just fell off the back of a taco truck. i wish i had tape recorded it as his tone was so patronizing and rude, he was very lucky i didn't beat his ass, too. and the sad thing is that he thought everyone was going to jump on me and come to his defense, but all my friends actually supported me as well and told him AND the professor that they were ganging up on me. that normally doesn't happen to me, i am usually always alone.
No. 1806455
File: 1702223632604.jpg (52.82 KB, 564x414, a14e222ed1599482332ddb77547f58…)
>>1806448I think you dropped this
No. 1806466
File: 1702224313013.jpg (35.26 KB, 480x456, vb8b8pefqnr31.jpg)
I'm tired of feeling like a loser. Yeah sure I have a STEM degree and I'm almost done with my master's, but I'm also in my mid-twenties, only had one meaningful job at a company that turned out to be a dead end, have mediocre-bad grades, can't manage my time for shit, do everything at the last minute despite genuinely trying not to, and am constantly one bad day away from slipping into a cycle of NEET habits and apathy that takes weeks to get out of. I'm even on (prescribed) stimulants and this shit still happens. It sucks to see other people in the same/similar fields being way more successful and also having time for elaborate hobbies like ren fairs and art. I get that comparison is the thief of joy and everyone has their own shitty circumstances; it's just hard to see that when everyone is zooming past me and I'm stuck spinning my wheels in the mud. At least I have friends and a supportive family, though I feel like a burden when I complain or I ask for help (they don't make me feel that way, I do) because I never really get better, I just put out fires. Even though I've come a long way since my teenage disaster years, I still feel like I arrested my own development and I'll be forever chasing milestones I should have reached years ago.
No. 1806574
>>1806458 coUGH
key her car kek cough
No. 1806614
File: 1702233377313.jpeg (36.83 KB, 177x177, IMG_7025.jpeg)
i'm so depressed i'm missing all of my assignments and projects and not taking care of myself snd just being a piece of shit failure wallowing in my misery– only i'm not even sad. i don't feel sad anyway i mean there is a lingering sadness but it's been going on for so long due to ongoing circumstances that i cannot change no matter what, so it might as well be my default mode. i feel sad about being a lazy faildaughter and how i'm going to retake the year and probably drop out but i'm not like crying over it really i don't even think about it that much. i'm oretty numb for the most part but my body is catching up to the misery faster and way more than i am internally, like i'm losing so much hair and i'm missing my period and i can't sleep anymore which is only making me feel so much worse physically. i'm stressed out but i'm not FEELING it constantly. i feel nothing pretty much and i'm fine but i'm so exhausted i can't function and i'm putting everything off and aside for it to go away or blow over. i just don't feel like doing anything but rot. it's already over for me but i'm not particularly upset over it ( at the moment anyway idk ) because i've already accepted this as my reality in the eighth grade. it's like my body and consciousness are different entities not synchronized. i'm just letting everything fester around me, literally. i know i'm sabotaging myself i'm watching it happen but i'm not woman enough to do anything about what i do have control over. i'm giving up again i really don't have it in me i don't have the energy but again it's not like i'm crying over it or anything so idk. i'm not suicidal either. i feel braindead and despicably lazy. i don't have anyone to talk to about this in fact i don't have anyone at all and even if i did i would probably shut them out right now anyway out of shame so it's a good thing. i'm so empty and hollowed out
No. 1806637
File: 1702235055565.jpg (10.54 KB, 328x324, download (20).jpg)
WHY IS IT TURNING DARK AT 2PM???????
No. 1806638
File: 1702235138140.gif (381.8 KB, 500x273, sadpanda.gif)
>>1806637My wife just asked this shit. I FUCKING HATE IT SO MUCH. Seasonal depression is hitting me so hard already this year.
No. 1806642
File: 1702235360988.jpg (80.35 KB, 907x960, 1b5ec199482b4072ffd7cc9dbcc5d3…)
First world problem but I ate too much chicken and now I'm too full. My tummy hurts…
No. 1806679
I'm getting ready to leave my relationship. We don't live together, but we've been dating for two years, and now the man has announced he's going to work part-time to work on his creative projects.
That should sound all nice and aspirational, no? Plenty of people couldn't even dream of having enough saving to do that for an extended time. But this man has always had plenty of free time. Lives with parents, barely leaves the house, had a physical job so he wasn't mentally exhausted by the of the day. The only reason he struggled so far is because he has zero impulse control or discipline, so he barely sleeps and plays a lot of video games. He did work on his art from time to time, and published some finished projects, but it takes forever (hasn't finished a single in these 2 years though). I told him I don't trust he can manage his time even if he has more of it, and he needs to put in some kind of external pressure and deadlines for himself if he wants to do this, and also some way to keep himself in check and keep his motivation up. And his reply is that he finds it hard to find the motivation to outline such a framework…
I hope he manages to achieve everything he wants out of his art, but I'm fucking out
No. 1806710
>>1806581That’s so kind of you anon. I really needed to hear your kind words.
I’m just hoping I didn’t spread it unknowingly to my family members. I feel like I have to seclude myself so no one else can contract it…
No. 1806740
I hate when my mom makes fun of my weight. I don't know if she's ashamed of me or what, I told her my bmi is normal but she still calls me fat and says I should lose weight. I love her obviously but there's no reason to say that aside from wanting to make me feel ugly.
>>1806716Nonna.. If you broke up with the scrote who made you feel this way good riddance. You're worth more than this.
No. 1806787
>>1805974You don't sound like a creep at all nonna, i would actually love to have you here since i've been needing some hugs.
And i totally get what you are saying, i'm not trustful of moids either, that's why i'm always looking for any kind of redflag on them, which i wasn't able to spot any on him. I also hope i'm not being manipulated kek
And you are right, i do plan to talk to him about it to explain things, but i want to wait a little bit more. I don't want it to sound like im playing the hurt
victim when i was, in fact, hurting him.
If you're still around, i just want to say thank you for your caring and mindful reply,
nonnie. Have a great week!
No. 1806816
File: 1702243109384.jpeg (59.02 KB, 1114x585, IMG_0943.jpeg)
You can tell a lot about a person by their haircut
No. 1806834
>>1806832You hate men but for some reason look like yung lean (if white)
>>1806833Too much ketamine but you have a trust fund so it’s ok
No. 1806838
File: 1702244677895.png (543.07 KB, 640x853, sniff.png)
>>1806833You smell of petrichor
No. 1806876
>>1806845Don't worry
nonny you are a good person doing your best no matter what your everlastingly grumpy mother has to say about it
No. 1806948
>>1806944fall 2017-spring 2018
>art school, absolutely hated itfall 2018-fall 2019
>transferred to my current university, liked it but fumbled a bit at times. also started workingspring 2020-fall 2020
>school went online only due to covid, fuck that, just workedspring 2021-current
>continued chugging along and couldn't pass chem after the second try so i had to change my major No. 1806984
>>1806651I was almost sent to one because my therapist thought I might kill myself if I didn't, I was suicidal and thought maybe it would be for the better if I was locked up and got help…
but just before I could tell the therapist that I agreed they dropped the line "nobody who goes to the psych ward goes to get better" and it just clicked for me that they only exist to temporarily store people to keep them "safe" from themselves, and that they know full well it's not "helping" them. So it's just a waste of time really. Figured I might as well be suicidal at home eating ice cream and watching shitty anime in bed instead of in a white walled room with staff taking pity on me while they store me in a box before they send me home equally suicidal as when they took me in. I somehow wormed myself out of being sent there by the therapist.
No. 1806989
File: 1702253631343.png (176.88 KB, 2502x670, 1702253020458338.png)
I started reading more about DnD and apparently ed greenwood (the creator of the main setting in DnD) is a total degenerate. Well I shouldn't be surprised
No. 1807011
File: 1702255753859.png (371.11 KB, 750x1091, magicalrealmshelpme.png)
>>1806989The obscene amount of incest in Forgotten Realms lore makes me want to wither away and die every time I look up information for my games. Greenwood is a fucked up wrinkled beardy scrote and I can't stand how much his author fetish mucks up what is arguably the most known D&D campaign setting. In short, he sucks and is picrel. Sorry, really can't stand Greenwood.
No. 1807072
File: 1702260072225.jpeg (227.92 KB, 640x513, 640A3B3F-C754-4573-A3E1-85962F…)
>>1806816I have long wavy layered hair. What does that say?
No. 1807211
File: 1702269406157.jpg (64.59 KB, 635x635, 86188901-2452384864.jpg)
Just when I thought everything was fine and dandy and didn't have any source of anxiety anymore, an online friend gets triggered at me. Now the anxiety is back and I need to wait until this person comes back online so they can tell me everything I did wrong, waiting for the inevitable punches now.
No. 1807248
>>1807238Have you ever tried sugar waxing,
nonnie? I can’t handle shaving more than like once every 7 days or my skin gets super fucked. Regular waxing I was allergic to, sugar waxing has always been pretty great.
No. 1807268
>>1807266What I meant when I say “If you act as if you’re healthy”, is that
acting as if includes changing your behavior. Allowing yourself to eat better, allowing yourself to move more, allowing yourself to drink more water, allowing yourself happier thoughts.
No. 1807280
File: 1702279035130.jpg (51.34 KB, 450x450, 3-Up Mad DogMotorcycle Legends…)
sharing food kills my appetite. i know it's selfish but seriously - shouldn't the person hovering and asking if they can have some greedy themselves? i can't say no because then i'd be an asshole, but if i say yes i don't get to enjoy myself like how i wanted. i still share from time to time, but c'mon… i just wanna spoil myself on my dime this once!
No. 1807301
File: 1702283110484.jpeg (80.96 KB, 600x325, 71865106-C12E-473F-8260-55247D…)
i didnt brush my teeth this morning i spent too much on gas my life is going nowhere im annoyed by my friends again for no reason my usual hobby isnt making me happy and i ate granola bars in bed and got crumbs everywhere
No. 1807309
I finally found the perfect psychological explanation to my shortcomings in relationships and all the pieces are coming together.
I am in fact searching for the perfect substitute parent.
There are several reasons to this.
The first is my parent's shortcomings. I am looking for someone who will make up for them and save me from them. I am typing this as my dad is grumbling in his room, which awakes historical fear in me.
The second is I know my parents will die, and I will need a family to replace them. Someone whi gives me a sense of comfort, who helps me make decisions in life, who takes care of me.
I wanted to look for that in men. And because I am sheltered, also because I knew that for people to want me I had to give them what they wanted - which was easier if they were losers with low standards - I've been reiterating the same mistake of materning losers.
I know I find psychology silly, but this explanation feels so right.
How do I break this cycle?
I found it extremely comforting last night, as I found myself missing N's comfort, to imagine a part of me was that parent for myself. I told myself what I had to do tomorrow, in a firm but empathetic voice. Then I comforted myself and told myself how to sleep.
All these weird roleplays where I try to emulate a dominant but caring person who tells me what to do for my own good, I can actually make them real… with myself. And I am the only person who can fulfill that role of being the perfect parent for me.
Now that all of this is cleared, you might tell me : your relationship with N wasn’t based on this perfect idea of parental love you were projecting onto him. Maybe that was part of your expectations, but there was something else! This house thing. Maybe you could grieve of this perfect parental love and keep him for the investment projects?
Well, I don’t believe in that at all. If we forget all ideas on « love » that wouldn’t be « materially » rooted, I am of no interest for him. If what he wants the most is to feel « reassured », he will find it much more reassuring to have a girlfriend nearby. And in the meantime, I will be wasting my time and energy in this relationship.
Not only that, but I can probably also find someone who isn’t NEET and abusive someday. And if I don’t, I think it’ll be fine. The housing market has been crashing lately and I don’t think the prices will remain as high forever. And if they do, I have my parents to help me.
No. 1807399
>>1807311Being high while skiing doesn't sound like a good time to me.
There's nothing wrong with being cozy and listening to music before falling asleep. That's mostly what I do with mine lol
No. 1807405
File: 1702299167699.gif (3.6 MB, 600x600, 1671818445986.gif)
I hate being talentless. I see people who do things effortlessly that take me ages to do mediocrely. I wish i was good at something, just one single thing.
No. 1807415
>>1807405Nobody is naturally good at something to a point of excelling at it right away. It's always one of the following:
>rich parents throwing money at hobbies and toys so little Timmy can leave them alone to golf and other adults can praise them for being such a good parent and encouraging Timmy's passion for origami>stage mom living vicariously through her child and having no achievements of her own so she forces Sally into skating or ballet at age 3 and treating her like an army cadet>extreme, relentless autism>extreme, relentless poverty and/or child abuse forcing a child to become [insert stereotypical high-income career] so they can escape their shitty family or townsource: Russian parents
No. 1807423
File: 1702300237575.png (7.04 MB, 3100x1624, soulful.png)
>>1807418same
nonny, same. But i was mostly refeering to people who, even though they suck, they have innate 'soul'. The rendermaxxer begs on the bad art thread always get to me, because i have been drawing for 3 years and i have yet to make something this soulful, even though i have better fundamentals
No. 1807508
>>1804501Holy shit I wish I knew. I'm older and going back to school, and I've seen some of these kids act like complete fucking monsters, or entirely brain dead and be impossible to talk to. Not to mention, maybe half my class has been taking deadline extensions for things as little as "I couldn't concentrate", so they're unfairly getting weeks worth of extra time for shit. I'd normally join in, but I can't stand being behind on my work for fun when deadlines aren't my issue.
I'm so fucking sick and tired of a group of 4 shitty 18-23 year old roommates who all showed up the same year as me to my college. They all live in the same house, went to the same shitty high school. I don't want to be too specific about their shit, but they've consistently tried to get their targets to either leave, somehow get expelled, or get fired. It hasn't worked a single time but despite getting yelled at directly, they haven't stopped. This is on top of all of them turning in dogshit work, pissing off professors, and being general nuisances. They're always the most obnoxious people in every class, and they've been in most of mine.
Supposedly there are tons of stories, but I only spoke to 1 of their targets about it. I had been pulled aside and basically warned by upperclassmen that they only came there to be harassers, and they will genuinely pull mean instead of being productive. They're not coming back next semester and were told to just fucking leave and take sabbaticals, because they've caused so much disruption and are losing the school money every time someone leaves due to their shit. I'll give them some credit, they're smart enough to not put ANYTHING in writing and lovebomb people to cover their tracks. It's so predictable, they'll talk mad shit out in the open, someone walks in on them, and suddenly their ringleader is trying to do some work on them with a bullshit, creepy conversation. No adult likes dealing with this. Every single issue they've made has been a massive problem since you need a character witness for every single person practically, everything they do is done without anyone seeing it, and the "conversations" they claim to have are always allegedly private with no way to prove anything. I fucking hate them. I'm so fucking sick of them. Nobody else acts like this except 2 dumb exceptions who are terminally online rich kids. Everyone else is trying to work. I feel so stupid getting rolled by some 19 year old but I finally sent an email requesting to present a final early so I don't have to deal with them. A lot of other kids are huge brats or socially BADLY stunted, but the shittiness is generally worse, with worse consequences if they were to pull it all in an environment where they'd be listened to.
No. 1807520
>>1807504Good luck, anon! I used to be in a similar situation where I lived in a three story building and the apartment above me would go outside every 20 mins to smoke cigarettes. Our bedroom was next to the window/balconey, so the smoke would waft in and we werent able to open our windows at all. I finally got fed up and knocked on the door. An older woman opened up and denied every smoking or opening/shutting the balcony door very loudly every 20 mins. She was the only person living above me too. I really hate inconsiderate neighbors and hope everything goes well for you,
nonnie.
No. 1807535
File: 1702306968624.jpg (37.71 KB, 500x480, 9ec9bdb91ac9952495206e87b77bd6…)
I hate onlyfans so much nonnas…At first, I just felt like it was a way for sex workers to post and offer their services, but now it's rampant and a good majority of girls did it, getting on camera and selling porn because the money is good. I don't expect them to see how harmful it is to women because they are blinded by the financial aspect of it all.
Part of me wanted to bring back public shaming for prostitution again, totally worth it.
No. 1807598
I haven't felt anger in years and I feel like that might be unhealthy. Now that I think about it, I haven't felt any emotion strongly except for sadness in years. But anger, I just haven't felt. I am worried this isn't good. While people around me have commented on how calm and peaceful and chill I am, I used to be extremely angry even violent, makes me think it is good progress. At the same time, this shouldn't be normal, right? I have barely felt like I am in my body for quite some years. I neglect but the barest standards of hygiene and only do enough to get by, all my hobbies are gone, I don't consume anything new, I do nothing outside work, hell, I haven't been on lolcow in years apart from skimming a cow's thread once a while. Is this a good development? People around me seem to think so, but I want to feel angry, I feel like I've actually forgotten it.
No. 1807616
File: 1702312131818.jpeg (53.45 KB, 540x360, IMG_1956.jpeg)
Would be really nice to just disintegrate like a pile of dust right about now
No. 1807705
File: 1702317298289.gif (157.23 KB, 336x300, c7c839c5aea8b0b293a96fecd495aa…)
Anybody else here a twin? I love my brother but his existence just pisses me off. He's engaged, got a masters in physio and is looking to buy a house. Meanwhile I dropped out of college for my shite degree in film studies and I've been living at home, totally useless. I really love him, he's a solid dude but for just some stupid chromosomes I wouldn't be a worthless alcoholic mess.
No. 1807779
>>1807747the anon I replied to acted like a petulant child over actual children whose parents could be going through God knows what. if they have such pure hatred toward children who may be having a bad day just like they are and are still learning how to regulate themselves, they should drive in their own vehicle. it’s such an immature point of view to expect parents and children to be perfect all the time just to accommodate you in public transportation that both of you are probably in since it’s the best thing you can afford. this type of attitude breeds unhealthy discipline. children shouldn’t live without boundaries and I agree that an environment such as public transit offers the opportunity for parents to teach their children appropriate behaviour and self-regulation, yet being treated with hatred and contempt is the worst upbringing for any child and will only fuel their disregulated behaviour. there is no point, it doesn’t solve a thing. it is simply pathetic to speak with such hatred over children because it happens to inconvenience you on your commute. have a bit of understanding for the people around you and quit being so self-centered. baffles me how people can talk down to parents and children so boastfully without zero self-awareness or empathy.
>my mom raised me to not get in people's personal space, touch people's things, or sit like that.as was I. There is a lot wrong with parenting today and I would like to see improvements as well, but bitterness and impatience only fuel the poor parenting of today. besides, despite being a very well-mannered child, I developed anxiety early on, as the convenience of the people around me was prioritised over my emotional needs. This is the case for many children whose needs go unheard because parents simply view them as an inconvenience and subsequently they develop unhealthy habits that go unnoticed because the children are “polite” and “mature”.
No. 1807854
Taking this time to formally call myself out for my behavior.
Look, what you went through in the past isn't your fault. You didn't have the most stable home and you ended up, naively, relying upon others who you thought had your best interests at heart. You didn't know and that's okay, but maybe these thoughts are coming back to you right now because of the anniversary being today. You've had relationships with shitty people and pardoned their behavior, choosing instead to shoulder all of the blame because you constantly saw divorce growing up and feared doing the same thing that your parents did.
.. but girl, holy shit, you were never married. You have never even been engaged. You've been proposed to and turned them both down, because something deep down told you that you weren't ready and neither were the person you're meant to end up with.
I get why you're neurotic. I get why you overthink and reach for fantastical theories about what if and why someone isn't responding. I get that, in the past, your fears were founded because those people WERE actually doing unsavory things behind your back. However, you're letting your past color your current relationship and YOU NEED TO FUCKING STOP IT. Sure, you haven't lashed out or made accusations and that's honestly great for you because it does show progress, but you need to get to the bottom of why these thoughts happen. You need to understand that it isn't the 2010s anymore. You're not in that house anymore. You've grown so much and you're still making progress.
This is the first time you've actually felt like you're in love, right? All the other times, it isn't that you didn't care, but your affections began to wane once they started to mistreat you. You've been terrified of this realization for the last several months and have had no idea how to articulate it until now, ironically. You've been patient, but not patient enough and I'm telling you right now that you're too old to be doing this shit. You need to get it together, because even though you two aren't having a rough time, your intrusive thoughts could very easily ruin the best thing you've ever had if you don't get your shit under control.
You may not ask for texts every five minutes. You may not actually be needy or clingy, but you NEED to understand that this is the real world and this is what comes with being an adult. It is finals week for most people and they're a law student with two years left. They live back with their parents because they're helping foot the tuition bill and you of all people know what that feels like. You know that you have to toe the line when living back home and abide until you're able to stand on your own. Don't forget where YOU came from just because you're no longer in it. Do you have any idea how difficult their major is and juggling work and a hectic home life? You know a fraction, but not intimately enough to understand and you need to fucking understand that YOU DON'T ALWAYS COME FIRST. And, it doesn't mean that you're suddenly unloved! Why the fuck would someone getting busy with real world things mean that everything which was said in the past is invalid and you two are doomed? Are you insane, entitled, or both?
You're upset because an LDR isn't easy and because you wish you could just live together already, but guess what? IT ISN'T GOING TO HAPPEN IF YOU GO AND ACT LIKE AN IDIOT. You can still miss people. Nobody's saying you can't text or call, but you've been acting paranoid and for no good reason. Yes, you have trauma. Yes, you've been mistreated in the past, but not every person is some schizo internet cautionary tale. You've been online for long enough to know just how miserable people are and how many delight in the suffering of others.
Stop being retarded and realize that somebody's love for you doesn't just melt away because they got swamped with school, work, and family obligations. Sure, they could plan better, but that isn't the argument here.
No. 1807968
File: 1702331896103.png (148.85 KB, 415x284, IMG_20231211_154357.png)
I used to love all my real life friends but the pandemic and college split us apart. I felt lonely but at least I had good online friendships.
Now I feel like isolating from my online friendships too, I love them even more than my previous real life friends but it feels like I can't deal with the nuances of having friends right now. I can't deal with being a burden, and I also don't feel like listening to their vents either, not because I hate them but because I can't keep being people's therapists. But you can't say that just lightly because people flip. I really really do love them and want them in my life, I'm just a moody bitch.
No. 1807996
File: 1702333008469.png (422.95 KB, 800x800, download.png)
>>1807995>integrationSomeone said it. Time to bust out this bad boy.
No. 1808064
>>1808046You aren't being unreasonable, this is very strange. I think MOST mothers wouldn't want their daughter's BF to move in just yet. It IS too soon. Going from friend to romantic relationship can change a lot. What if it turns out you aren't compatible together romantically? You're stuck living together. Why would your mom move out with this guy? Not to be pessimistic but is it possible this guy is only expressing interest in a relationship because he is desperate to find housing? And does your mom have a
crush on this guy?
I'd tell your mom that you think it is too soon for him to move in with you guys. Phrase in a way she might be sympathetic to, that you think it seems low-class or trashy, that it makes you look desperate or slutty, that you don't want to live with a guy before you are married because that isn't proper. Your mom is being weird but she might come around to how you feeling if you frame it right.
No. 1808108
I’m a very closed off person. It takes a lot for me to open my heart. Yet Every. Single. One. of the rare times I give my heart to something or someone, that person or thing turns out to be shit. And not just a little shitty, more like so insanely plot-twist level evil that it feels like I’m in a dark comedy. Why? Seriously, why? If the universe is trying to train me like a dog, it would make sense.
>behavior: start caring about someone or something
>reward: immense and unrelenting emotional pain
Men did it to me, so I decided to focus on women. Then even women turned out the same way, so I decided to become passionate about serious hobbies/activities. Then those serious hobbies and activities turned out corrupted, so I decided to just involve myself in casual lighthearted things. And then those lighthearted things ended in abuse and death too. it doesn’t matter what it is, I always get the rug pulled out from under me as soon as I start to become happy. It’s hard not to take these reoccurring outcomes as a message from the universe. I feel like a character in a story that is being written into an inevitable suicide.
Every time I am betrayed or let down by something or someone, it takes so much work and so much time to heal my heart enough to try again. And every time I try again I am rewarded with the same result. I can’t trust anyone. I can’t trust anything. There is nowhere for my mind to land when I’m trying to fall asleep, everything in my life that once brought me comfort has transformed and destroyed itself and now brings me nothing but excruciating pain to remember. The only thing that brings me comfort these days is imagining my death.
No. 1808116
File: 1702340028597.jpg (28.15 KB, 650x740, 6f50c2f37fbbf166b90f851f65aefe…)
took an assessment and turns out I don't have ADHD, I'm just a depressed retard
No. 1808174
ive been in a much better relationship the past year+ versus my previous one, which was one sided, toxic, and abusive. it lasted on and off for 9 years, and it feels amazing to feel free and whole on my own for the first time, ive never felt anything like it.
however- i got a text from what i assume is a burner number or a sort of VOIP, asking if this is still my number. I asked "whos asking?" and the reply was "no one important, thats all i needed to know. :)"
i dont have anyone who would be on my bad side right now, and it wouldnt be any client i've worked with through work as they used my nickname.
My boss, after telling her about it, called the number and left a voice mail- she didnt state mine or her name and said she missed a call and was returning it. i immediately got a text saying "awe, you had your work call. How cute.""
After i calm down, i understand im okay and safe, but i am absolutely terrified of any possibilities. i have had no contact with him for over a year and i do not want any further contact, im paranoid he could show up at my work place or try and find my house, or he'll do something malicious through my phone number. im so scared and I dont know what to do- i meant to get a restraining order when he called me 83 times consecutively when i broke up with him, and im afraid i should have done it then. I dont know what to do, and my mind is racing with thoughts of what could happen involving him- or if its someone else who could it be?? if it was anyone else they would NOT have talked to me that way. i dont know what to do
No. 1808200
>>1808191My situation wasn't the same as yours, but I figured I might as well put my own two cents in the fountain. I knew a fat guy and he would always complain to me about being fat. Like, almost every day. I would suggest taking 30 minute to an hour walks outside, doing at-home exercises, drinking more water and less alcohol, etc. but he would always make stupid excuses for himself like being "too insecure and nervous" to even go outside for 30 minutes. It was really pathetic. What's sad is that in his skinny pictures, he was pretty nice looking. But he ate himself back into being fat because he constantly let his anxiety get the better of how he deals with life. It's a retarded, sad, and frustrating thing to always hear someone complain about being unhealthy but not having any backbone to STOP IT, you know? But then again, that doesn't just apply to overweight people, it can go for anyone.
No. 1808221
>>1808213I can't help but feel that I'm the girl you
fuck in the ass and laugh at for allowing itbecause I'm just too much of an ugly failure to qualify for more. Girls that are decent get the decent treatment from the same men who'd brutally degrade me without blinking an eye. I've heard men admit that they see women this way. They have a category of ugly shameful abusable women who will never deserve more than being face down in the mud with a smile
No. 1808240
>>1808238you will get a job eventually, it's basically inevitable. It's dumb to kill yourself over fixable or temporary problems.
I wish my problems were temporary and fixable. I'm just biding my time at this point until I off myselfIf you're getting lots of interviews that means your resume is decent. How have you felt like your interviews have been going?
No. 1808263
>>1807817if it makes you feel any better nobody has ever wanted to marry me and I'm in my mid 30s
now it's too late cause I think its actually a trap I have more money than most scrotes anyway
No. 1808286
Apologies for my psychotic/retarded ramblings. Thank you to any anon who takes the time to read this absolute bullshit.
I'd been seeing this moid for a bit and it was absolutely great. He was everything I'd been looking for. I could be my autistic self around him and didn't have to hide my weird hobbies (like laughing at cows) because he's familiar with all of that. Otherwise, he was kind, mentally stable, nice family, good job… all the things I could really want in a scrote.
Anyway, a few days ago I tried to express some feelings of mine to him and I guess I did a bad job? He took at as me breaking up with him somehow and instantly told his friends, blah blah blah, got super cold. I tried to explain it and correct the mistake but he said he needed time to think because he can't do "drama"… over a misunderstanding? Okay I guess, kek.
Over the past few days communication between us has dwindled down to nothing. He's reached out a few times to send a picture of one his pets, some retarded meme, but also to say that he doesn't know where he stands. Essentially there's no feeling set in stone for him. I feel like this means it's over for sure. He wants to meet up this weekend to talk, but I feel like there's no point in dragging it out. It seems cruel to just make me wait days and days without talking just to break it off.
I've pretty much passed the point of being sad and just become angry with the whole situation. Angry at myself for being vulnerable with him, for trusting him with my body (sex is a big deal for me and I told him this. My fault still), and for thinking he would be different. Things really did feel so incredible, but at this point the illusion has been shattered. I just want to get this over with.
I don't know if I should just break it off myself and mail him his things or whatever. That stupid sliver of hope is telling me to see things through. Logically, I know this is me being pathetic. I probably deserve better. I have so much love to give and shouldn't waste my time with this garbage. Idk. I'm getting to the age where I want to start building something real and work toward having a family, and this is so not it. I feel so retarded anons, I really do.
Hopefully I can get over this soon. I just want a conclusion so I can move on with my life and keep on looking for what i need.
No. 1808288
>>1808108samefag. I think it is impossible for me to ever trust again. I just can't go through this again. Everyone around me tells me that i just need to find something new to care about, find new people, but somehow they don't understand how every time I've done that in the past it has ended in complete heartbreak. The latest ones are: my friend since middle school mistreated me for months and then scammed me, and a woman I was in love with turned out to be abusing younger women at work. I still see her face when I try to go to sleep and cry. half for her
victims who will never see justice and for my deep love for her that I am trying so hard to destroy even though it's the one thing that kept me going after the betrayal of my friend.
No. 1808295
>>1808245I heard that term before. They love doing it. Like, it's insane to me that I need to hear about your
abusive father and cucked, alcoholic mother in detail on my discord when I just want to post photos of cats. I really hate that they don't know how to act like normal people.
>>1808268I've had this shit happen irl too at events. It's so awkward. Zoomers love to talk about consent, yet I didn't consent to you dumping half your childhood story on me when I just want an oatmilk latte.
No. 1808300
>>1808286I think you're doing the right thing on breaking it off with him, nona. If he gets upset over a
minor miscommunication of some sort, then it won't work out in the long run. Trust your gut. You're not being retarded, believe me. You know what you want, and you'll get it. This guy is not it. Cheers.
No. 1808310
File: 1702352208515.jpeg (824.42 KB, 1071x1890, IMG_8726.jpeg)
I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life curled up in a cave working remotely and hiding from men. Everyone is horrifying. This whole ‘nudify’ wave is making me scared to be outside for more than 5 minutes. I don’t care if it makes me sound like a narcissist to be scared about this type of shit I’d rather act like a narcissist and be safe than be careless. This cannot possibly be protected under freedom of expression, but here we fucking are.
No. 1808311
File: 1702352303218.jpeg (481.47 KB, 882x1159, 7255BA00-AD24-42D3-AF22-CCE0E6…)
why did technoblade have to die in such a horrible way? i’m not a dream smp fag, i just genuinely enjoyed his solo content and the occasional minecraft monday stream when i was younger. he was so much better and more humble than many of his peers and the poor bastard had to be the one to croak. i hate it. i wish any of the other throwaways had gotten it instead. why do the good die young nonnas?
No. 1808318
File: 1702352648066.gif (6.06 KB, 177x200, shake-think.gif)
Family (mom and aunt mostly) keeps insisting that I need to stay home and save for a house rather than rent an apartment once I get a job, but I'm not sure they understand how much homes cost……or is it just me? Genuinely asking: am I missing something here? I go online to Zillow and I look at homes and I filter "0 to $50,000" — I see trailers, empty plots of land, extreme fixer-uppers…there are a few "okay" houses, but they're literally in the middle of nothing/dead and dying towns. My whole issue is that I'm currently in a dead town. Trying to get out!
Plus I mean, at most, I'll be making $41,000 a year (very generous, very hopeful estimate, at worst $30,000 if neither job I'm looking at right now work out)…so even if our state is very low cost of living, it's not as if I can just save for a year and buy a house. Not a decent to good one anyway – if I bought a shitty one I'd be pouring MORE money into getting it livable. I guess there's rent-to-own but why tf would I pay ~1k usd (or even 900 usd) to live in a tiny suburb that's 30 minutes from my job? And maintenance costs on top of that? A really nice apartment in the city is $800 usd and it's potentially a ten minute bus ride from the office. If I get into that office.
And if it was like that — save for 1 year, buy a house — I really don't want to be tied down to this state, and I really want out of my mom's home also. Staying and saving would be smart, but I think I'll bank like 6k and bounce. Maybe less than that.
No. 1808351
>>1808343>wHo WouLd WannA SeE YoU NakEd HEhe sO VaiN oF YoU!Many of the women posted there are often just very average women. I don't mean to sound mean but they're just….regular women you could walk by on the street or find on Facebook. I think the most haunting thing I saw there was a picture of a very obvious highschool aged girl with her mom :( they just were casually posing for a sledding picture and the scrote wanted them both naked.
>why are you on /r/ I've gone there to ask for sources to doujin caps kek.
No. 1808356
>>1808326Yeah, exactly. My mom's not really a boomer but she did buy her place (trailer) for maybe $15k…I'm not sure how to check how much my aunt paid for hers up front but she mentioned that she's Still Fucking Paying for it (rent to own situation) and she's easily 66. Had to have bought it when she was my age (mid twenties). So it can't be cheap.
I get what they're saying kind of and it'd be totally reasonable if I wanted to live in my state but I don't kek
No. 1808359
>>1808348Don't worry
nonnie, they will. They do this because they're unwanted by everyone, it's how they get their "revenge". Don't let this shit stop you from living your life. Nothing makes them seethe more than a woman happy without them. Whatever the AI generates isn't you, and deep down they know it too. Freaking out like this just encourages and excites them. We win by simply ignoring them, they're so far beneath us that it isn't worth even remembering they exist.
No. 1808366
File: 1702354146198.jpeg (44.71 KB, 480x360, IMG_9052.jpeg)
>>1808336this is how I feel about males
No. 1808370
>>1808230It’s even worse because most of it happens to people I knew who were nerdy autists like me, our friendships were completely fine just being a screen name and some small info like a first name. I don’t understand what happened, some cancer slowly spread and now I know shit that makes me uncomfortable, I want to mind my own business personally. I’ve have great friendships I didn’t even know their actual first name, but we still had mutual trust. I hate that it’s just assumed now if you want some anonymity you have something to hide.
>>1808342My dream is for some h4x0rs to go after porn sites more. We could have 10 Ashley Madison like breaches a week with the amount of porn sites.
No. 1808380
>>1808370same, i've had great friendships online not ever knowing first names. i even made a server just for me and my friend group in an MMO and i got pretty annoyed when one guy made his pfp a selfie and promptly made fun of him for being an attention whore
>>1808372they really have spread their virus to the autists. i remember a time when posting what you looked like in online spaces i visited made you weird and everyone rightly called you an attention whore.
No. 1808403
>>1808372When I first found a server with a selfie channel I was so confused, none of them are even good looking so it’s not like they have something to flaunt. The only interaction is just another user reacting to the selfie with some emoji, is that really that gratifying? I didn’t even tell other people I was a girl in a lot of communities because it made me an easy target and it wasn’t relevant. Now everyone wants to be an egirl and you have to put your age and pronouns in your bio or you’re suspected of being a weird
TERF.
>>1808388Men are retarded so you could probably just get a list of usernames on a site and a big chunk of those would be traceable back to them. Fingers crossed le hacking moids stop having retarded skid wars and trying to scam each other and instead realize the blackmail value in the data of users of porn sites and even the creators.
No. 1808428
>>1807779>it’s such an immature point of view to expect parents and children to be perfect all the time just to accommodate you in public transportation that both of you are probably in since it’s the best thing you can afford. NTA but isn't having decent manners and behaving normally basic common sense? Idg your "immature point of view" part, like the majority of people don't like it when kids (or anyone) behaves like that, it doesn't mean they have to be perfect all the time. Not doing those things should be the bare minimum like someone covering their mouth when they cough.
>but bitterness and impatience only fuel the poor parenting of today.How? I don't think OP even talked to those parents directly. Idk this whole post is weird anon, there's nothing wrong with being annoyed at someone's public behavior if they're not yelling at them or something
No. 1808436
File: 1702359292642.jpg (1.04 MB, 1680x1680, devnonnas.jpg)
>>1808427
the power we could wield…
come on devnonnas, use your holidays for all of womankind!
No. 1808438
>>1808436coward, you deleted it
well, I'll loudly declare that I want ai lewd tools for women like men do
No. 1808467
File: 1702361826015.jpg (8.36 KB, 275x222, 1698723538057.jpg)
Can't sleep, unfortunately crying again (liked being emotionally dead because better than crying), my muscles hurt from clenching at night, my neck hurts like hell, my raynaud's is making it hard to stay warm (I'm wearing the light material cold weather gear under my pajamas with fuzzy socks ffs), and I'm going insane from tinnitus particularly in my right ear. I want to be mercy shot.
No. 1808478
File: 1702362489239.jpg (1.75 MB, 4096x5120, howcananyoneactuallylikemoids.…)
All moids are pedophiles
No. 1808480
>>1808467>liked being emotionally dead because better than cryingI feel that. Just want to be an emotionless robot most days.
>I'm going insane from tinnitusThat's a hell I wouldn't wish on anyone. I had it for a week and it was pure torture.
No. 1808484
File: 1702362846065.jpeg (12.04 KB, 275x274, 1661478748670.jpeg)
>>1808478Is there some sort of psychological reason as to why males are blatantly so much more likely to be pedophiles? I once saw a theory on here that the reason why males are pedophiles so often is because their brains are tremendously stupid at processing emotions that aren't just hatred. Like, when they see something they don't hate, their brains overdrive on liking it until they feel like
fucking it. I'm not a brainsurgeron or a psychologist, but maybe that theory would explain why males are meme'd into getting turned on by anything; their brains can't separate liking something from wanting to fuck something.
No. 1808494
>>1807638Samefag
>>1808428I told the kid touching my bag "Ugh, sorry?" and grabbed my things. And then when the kid decided kneeling behind my seat while sucking their lollipop with the worst wet noises was boring (and while it's Mom was busy with the second child that yelled more than talked for 25-30 minutes of a public transport commute - which I rely on because I don't have a driver's license) and went to the passageway between the seats to let people out and was actively getting into my personal space again by touching my arm and shoulder constantly, I sighed and moved from my seat to another away from it.
>>1807779Just because I vent about it on lc doesn't mean I turned to the kid or Mom and yelled at em. It's about as dumb as saying someone writing cusses and angry words in their diary means automatically they said those things in the face of people they're writing about. The interpretation is absolutely moronic.
No. 1808496
>>1808489Hmm but men are the first to claim women 'lose value' and are 'ruined' by each man she has sex with, and consider virginity to be of the utmost value. They just don't care if they 'ruin' a woman and think it's her fault for not avoiding the sex a man desperately tried to extract from her even when it's rape or coercion. But it's true at the same time they think it's no big deal to get raped and any woman who complains about it is exaggerating, they can compartmentalize that way.
Men are simply parasitic opportunists whose ethical standards end the moment their erection begins. If they will fuck animals, inanimate objects, women they find hideous, other men (in a prison gay scenario), of course they will fuck children. They have no biological purpose without coom.
No. 1808523
File: 1702365243854.jpg (506 KB, 2560x1606, Womens-cycling-ireland-scaled.…)
Was cycling to work yesterday. Got almost run over by some arsehole even though I had the right of way. He beeped his horn and looked mad at me like "you made me almost commit murder". Dickhead. I love my bike, it's the only exercise I really get although don't think I can handle getting mowed down every other day.
No. 1808550
When I first started frequenting Lolcow it used to be a site that was genuinely empowering to me - to read things written by other women that made me laugh, think, look at things from other perspectives and feel validated for finding someone who felt the same way about things. A lot of funny milk that I enjoyed sharing about cows. Yet now? Constant infighting. Anons are excessively aggressive and disrespectful towards each other. You can't discuss anything anymore without it devolving into an argument because someone can't just disagree and explain themselves, it has to escalate into a full out knife fight of yelling, screaming, insults, name calling and sperging and for some reason the mods either don't get involved at all despite numerous reports or then everyone opposing one side gets banned and a farmhand checks in which makes it seem like they're actually involved in the argument themselves. I actually changed my mind on multiple topics due to anons being patient and explaining themselves but these days you get called an arbitrary boogeyman by some person who barely internalized your point or even read your post.
The abundance of negativity really gets to me and instead of feeling empowered like I used to I leave the site constantly depressed and in a bad mood. And it's the same 3-4 infighting topics obsessively repeated in literally every thread around the site. No drama threads get updates besides anons blogging and nitpicking. I remember when Lolcow doxxed the zoosadists, documented Venus's escape from her mom, outed CreepShowArt and Momokun's liposuction, that was some funny as shit stuff but you don't get that anymore. Thoughtful posts get 0 replies while vindictive and provocative ones start an infight lasting for days because again, mods aren't interfering properly and make it seem like they have a bias they're not too shy about. Or maybe they're just overwhelmed by the constant amount of infighting that they don't feel like dealing with it.
I'm posting this not only to blog about it but because I want to ask anons for recommendations for other sites where I can nerd out with other women, I feel like I can't fully detach because I don't really have other places for online discussion to take part in and don't know how to fill the hole ex-Lolcow has left in my life and I keep coming back in a vain hope that I will reach some fellow oldfag and have a nice discussion again. But one thing is for clear, it has to go. I've been here for 8 years and I'm much older than I was when I first used the site, I can't continue hovering around here with the 19-year old Tiktok refugees and 4chan/Kiwifarms migrants behaving like the black and white thinking teenagers they are without going insane.
No. 1808560
>>1808550sorry nona, you've been here way longer than me and i'm sorry it came to this even if you still have some good memories, i really don't have anything i can suggest you but i hope other anons will notice your message and share something that works out
i don't get involved with cows since i'm not interested, i admit i don't like seeing infighting too and i don't know what is happening with the mods, mostly i just try to ignore the negative people but i don't have anywhere else to go where i can feel the way i feel here and i'm not a very social person so i don't look into it much either, but it would be nice if things would get better here even if i know it's not possible
No. 1808582
>>1808550it's a bit slow but you can check out fujochan, it's really chill.
And fwiw I think /ot/ and the milk boards are the most argumentative, /m/ and /g/ aren't so bad.
No. 1808590
File: 1702374768214.png (491.59 KB, 479x479, 1702347110286.png)
>>1808589you and me both nona
No. 1808661
>>1807779maybe people should stop bringing beings into this world who didnt ask for it then kek? they dont even care enough to discipline them or give them love.
public transportation is not the place to explore and be playing with others belongings! id be worried someone would hurt my kid. do they not teach kids this rule of hands to yourself? i may not have minded as the anon did but i sure as hell would have wondered why the mother is not telling her child to knock it off.
No. 1808677
File: 1702386039892.jpeg (40.39 KB, 480x241, F029C81B-BFD2-4F92-86ED-283A01…)
WHEN WILL IT END. I’ve been depressed all week for no real reason. I just want it to stop it’s starting to ruin things I was looking forward to
No. 1808688
File: 1702386626363.jpg (564.89 KB, 1440x1080, 1000012580.jpg)
>>1808682That's good. People want to shoo away anger and hate to psyop others into thinking that "positivity" is the only
valid emotion. They fail to understand that hate and anger are natural pieces to the soul, and a part of the process of being human. It's good to hate and be angry about things that hurt you. Remember in that Spongebob episode of employee training where the narrator said "nobody wants to be a Squidward"? Well life is the opposite of that. It's necessary to be a Squidward at many times in life.
No. 1808707
File: 1702388868494.jpeg (395.16 KB, 750x745, IMG_1960.jpeg)
screaming begins again
No. 1808715
>>1808688Yeah, we evolved with those emotions for a reason. Anger and hate are great when you can direct them into something productive. If you don't you end up like those stupid moids holding dumbass signs on the main street of my village every Friday. They are one step away from being flat Earthers
>SquidwardSquidward had a hard life. Dude just wants to play his clarinet and paint and chill. He'd be a lot happier if his neighbours weren't wrecking his head.
No. 1808743
File: 1702390661993.png (376.78 KB, 540x385, image.png)
Raw ventiing ahead but i fucking hate gross and pathethic and lonely and stupid boomer scrotes so much.
It's like you're at the top of their world if you just nod your head to whatever they say, you could even not say anything at all as long as you show that you don't hate them and they think that you're the best person in the world and i just wish i could have broken my façade or whatever and tell them how disgusting they are and how i hate them.
Yelling like they're in a jungle to another woman just because she disagrees with them but the second you come in they try to act all kind and as if they're a victim, i fucking hate that i had to see and solve those situations and that i had to deal with people like that and had no other choice.
These people shouldn't be able to pay their bills by how stupid and disgusting they are, sometimes i wish my mother didn't create me from one of these shits but it's pointless to whine about that, what i hate the most is that i had to deal with even more people like this, and i also hate that i know they act like this because they are attracted to you and it's not just about being the only person that doesn't get upset with them.
I can't wait to get them off my skin and be able to just be honest, i hate that i had to act like that just to avoid worse situations.
50+ year old scrotes acting worse than infants throwing tantrums.
No. 1808761
File: 1702391247062.jpg (74.06 KB, 750x1000, flat,750x,075,f-pad,750x1000,f…)
Fourth bottle of wine today. It's only 2pm but lets gooooooo
No. 1808825
>>1808805>I'd miss youThanks anon
>Sleep on your side tonightLol what dose this mean? I'm not going to be sleeping much anyway. I've got the next two days off and I'm going to buy 2g of coke off my dealer later on today.
No. 1808853
I've been tutoring for a girl in middle school and recently the parents seemingly broke up and the father moved out nearby, I thus have go to his house every other week. He was always a bit weird, I assumed at first that he was autistic, or burned out because of his work, but he didn't seem to know how to talk to me normally (like he always talked to me informally, even though I'm younger it wouldn't really be correct in my country). Since the break up he's been super jolly, and finally last week he "subtly" hit on me - you know when a moid asks you a ton of questions on random things, to seem like he's interested in your life, or jokes around a bit too much for it to be friendly - in front of his young daughter who was clearly uncomfortbale. I was trying to talk about his daughter's grades and homework and he always came back to me. Does he think I'm naive ? Isn't he ashamed to do that in front of his daughter, who must already be confused and hurt by her parents' situation ? Does he think a young woman would be attracted to an ugly old divorced dad ? Why are moids like that ? If he thinks I won't snitch on him to his ex-wife the moment he does something out of line so I never see his ugly face again, he's stupid.
No. 1808867
>>1808825It means that you can thow up in your mouth while you sleep and choke on it if you are on your back.
>I've got the next two days off and I'm going to buy 2g of coke off my dealer later on today.Have fun you lucky
nonny>>1808853That's awful and gross, I hope you can put him in his place immediatley. I wouldn't wait until he makes a stupid move, the fact that he's asking such questions and he's making you and his daughter uncomfortable should be enough for you to tell him to cut the crap. If I were you I'd talk to her mother asap and arrange your classes only in her house. Men are disgusting.
No. 1808878
>>1808723Most people are soulless and act with the hivemind.
They can see who is right in the head/who has proper emotions then act according to what the latest programming is.
No. 1808891
File: 1702396667543.jpg (26.57 KB, 460x215, header.jpg)
>>1808867Oh dang I never thought of that, good shout. I work in a maid cafe in London so I'm like always on call if someone doesn't show up. This is my biggest break I've had in ages. Work sucks but the tips are immense. Gonna enjoy my break. Downloaded some games on Steam I've been wanting to play for ages like pic related and got some shows lined up I've been needing to catch up on. Gonna get real coked up and enjoy my own company.
No. 1808938
File: 1702398657098.png (3.01 KB, 535x31, vUIZFdK.png)
I'm sad, I can't even enjoy fanfic anymore without retards shitting it up. I fucking hate this timeline
No. 1808947
>>1808932because you responded to a vent with a nitpick. at no point did i say that i was ovulating for the whole week or that i thought that's how it worked. i said it's going to be a long week because my mood changes and feeling warm usually last for that long and i'm dreading several more days of it. terribly sorry i didn't include all of that in my op vent.
>>1808938wow they really couldn't just write "please tell me about them" and be done with it?
No. 1808961
>>1808564My friend is self centered lol. She was raised wealthy and she was a "miracle" baby. Her parents paid for her to go to private art school but she dropped out anyway. They still baby her and cater to her expensive tastes to this day despite being elderly. I've seen the explosive friendship fallouts between her and at least 4 other people, and I've lasted the longest, 8+ years. I still love her deeply despite this, which is why I am angry, saddened and mourning my friendship.
It's funny, when you google "losing a friend to religion" all that comes up is why Christians should leave their current friends in order to give themselves up to god. About a month before this "religious awakening" she was totally obsessed and convinced she wanted to marry and be a homemaker for a man 10 years her senior who she had only known for 3 months.
She is searching for answers and meaning in her life, but change comes from within, not from external forces. And yes, I predict she uses her religion as a self-serving practice.
Praying for a non-religious person is self-serving. Comparing herself to her non-religious friend and boasting about how unlike that depressed negative friend, she's "choosing celebration and god" is a self-serving statement. And idgaf if she smokes weed or not but going from a pothead to believing weed is immoral the next week is also ridiculous.
I see no difference between joining a religion, joining the trans cult, or being a homemaker to a 10+ years older man. You're really naive if you think any of these things are down to earth or good. I am losing my friend.
No. 1808969
>>1808956no worries nonna, and i'm sorry i lashed out and called you an autist. that was hair-
trigger reactionary and uncalled for. it is good knowledge to share and i hope somenonny gets a chance to learn something new today!
No. 1808983
File: 1702399854223.png (78.63 KB, 391x400, nonnylove.png)
>>1808974thank you, i am super gonna need it. ilu2nonna!
No. 1809007
>>1808993>every couple that stay together without marriage for more than ten years are trapped in a gay beard thing I wouldn't necessarily label this a "beard" situation but it could definitely indicate a man is taking advantage of you and that you have no legal recourse if he decides to tank the relationship on year 11.
In what culture is this normal? One with plentiful welfare safety nets for women? Low costs of living?
The arguments for why not just don't make sense and benefit the man.
No. 1809029
>>1808961Just wanted to commiserate with you anon. My social group have entered our 30s and it's becoming very common to see otherwise nondenominational folks adopting a hard religious grandstand all of the sudden.
It's very pathetic and everyone sees through it.
It bothers me specifically because those adults who never were forced to grow up in a religion (catholic now athiest here) never had to sacrifice anything like their experiences and childhoods yet wear the religious costume now to feel morally superior–and I will say, moral fingerwagging is about all these people have got.
No. 1809031
File: 1702401773778.jpeg (17.33 KB, 275x275, 1594710457507.jpeg)
>>1808688>>1808715You either die a SpongeBob, or live long enough to become a Squidward
No. 1809058
File: 1702402477713.jpg (86.78 KB, 616x353, capsule_616x353.jpg)
BF has recommended me this game. Like the art, it's got real '10s emo vibe. Only played it for like 30 mins but I'm getting really bad energy.
No. 1809082
>>1809061From what I played it was kinda more of a visual novel than an actual game. Characters are fun.
>>1809063>>1809064>>1809068How bad is it? Do they actually fuck? He lives with his sister so I'm kinda worried. I love spooky stuff and he gives me great recs but your replies are getting me worried.
No. 1809096
>>1808550i feel your frustration as a fellow oldfag and have a lot of the same thoughts. i miss the farmers from the past and have a little collection saved on my computer of screenshots of all my favorite posts. we had some really great discussions in /ot/ back in the day about all kinds of topics and there were a lot of really educated people who used to post here. i have no idea what happened to them or even if they're still using the internet since so many people are choosing to opt out, but i wish i could go back in time and tell them how much i appreciated their contributions to the boards because they probably didn't get told that, ever.
>I'm posting this not only to blog about it but because I want to ask anons for recommendations for other sites where I can nerd out with other women, I feel like I can't fully detach because I don't really have other places for online discussion to take part in and don't know how to fill the hole ex-Lolcow has left in my life and I keep coming back in a vain hope that I will reach some fellow oldfag and have a nice discussion again. But one thing is for clear, it has to go. I've been here for 8 years and I'm much older than I was when I first used the site, I can't continue hovering around here with the 19-year old Tiktok refugees and 4chan/Kiwifarms migrants behaving like the black and white thinking teenagers they are without going insane.i wish i could help you anon, i really do because we are in the same boat. i've been here around the same amount of time as you, give or take a few years as i lurked for a long time. even if we weren't just talking exclusively women centered discussion, it's so hard to find spaces online anymore without running into the same issue, sadly. everywhere nowadays has been filled with a lot of negative, mentally ill people and it's incredibly depressing because it's simultaneously boring and also depressing as hell. not that long ago, you could find pockets within larger communities of people having sane, interesting debates, sprinkled here and there on larger platforms. what happened to those people? it crosses my mind a lot more and more as the years pass. i used to have so much fun on the internet and it was an enjoyable experience to talk to people. i really have no idea where to go either and it sucks. plus all the female-dominated spaces online either get taken over by transgenders or other nefarious characters with ill intentions, so even if you were to try to create another female-centric space, it would just be taken over. sad all around. i guess it's time for us to 'grow up'.
No. 1809108
File: 1702404118414.gif (966.28 KB, 640x332, well-fuck.gif)
>>1809082Well that video says it. I'm gonna give him one chance to explain himself and if he doesn't have a good explanation he's gone.
No. 1809144
File: 1702405081623.png (2.2 MB, 1179x1529, E66891C5-F6E7-42AD-A36F-9BB2A5…)
First time getting food poisoning (?) and never felt so shit in my life. Woke up early this morning to throw up in the sink repeatedly, then passed out on my brother’s floor and a mirror fell on me. My brother and mum have it too, we went to Starbucks yesterday but my other brother doesn’t have it as he didn’t go, so I’m suspecting it’s food poisoning even though we all had different drinks. My teeth feel disgusting and I couldn’t even drink anything for a while as I felt so bad. There’s like an awful churning, stabbing sensation in my stomach and every time I throw up it’s splashing me on my legs and on the floor.
I was supposed to finish my finals assignments today and this week too, why is my luck like this
No. 1809191
File: 1702406555709.jpeg (108.99 KB, 768x576, Fx9lwx2XwAIQmk_.jpeg)
I am incredibly lonely, it hurts so much. I can't think of the last time I ever talked to someone that wasn't related to work or an issue they had with something. I feel alien and bizarre. I've never had a conversation in my life. Never felt a connection with someone. I've never presented myself sincerely either, it's always been a façade. I'm being so dramatic, I'm sorry.
No. 1809210
>>1809191Don’t apologize
nonnie. A lot of people realize this about themselves.
No. 1809231
>>1809206Thank you. I am grateful everyday that my life has objectively gotten better, I think that is why I am having these conversations with myself now, because I have the luxury, really. I will try the thread, have you had any success?
>>1809210Comforting knowing I'm not alone (heh) in this. What helped you?
No. 1809242
File: 1702408102653.jpg (110.34 KB, 1200x1200, 61EPOftphL._SL1200_.jpg)
>>1809191If it help, loneliness isn't a unique issue. During Covid I bought myself a boyfriend pillow. I'm a little embarrassed but I cuddled that think every night. The internet age has brought us together but also kept us apart.
No. 1809251
>>1809239This is really sweet. Solitude doesn't always have to suck… I can live with myself just fine but I kind of gave up on my various hobbies because work takes so much of my time now, I should pick something up again.
>>1809242Incredibly based purchase, nothing to be embarrassed about.
Thank you for being so nice anons, these exchanges made me feel better.
No. 1809278
>>1809179off-topic but nona, do you get this insane urge for everything to be clean during your period, too? I am normally clean but I always get insane about cleanliness around that time (might be some activation of my OCD, which I no longer take meds for). It was the worst when I lived with a moid because normally I would clean up a lot of his mess without too much complaining (yeah I was stupid), but during my period I would get so frustrated with having to do it largely on my own and sometimes I raged a bit (not proud of it).
Anyway I will probably start tomorrow since I obsessively cleaned today.
No. 1809337
>>1809068The review is 100% on point until the last 10 minutes, you can tell the guy get's high by his own farts.
Yes it's a trashy Ao3 incest fanfic that shouldn't be taken serious made into a game but so what? You can find hundreds of thousand incest fics on Ao3 and nobody in the west(lol) wants to shut down that website.
Hell even before the internet people wrote bad incest smut.
I also watched the first 5 minutes of this person's Pokemon complete retrospective and first few seconds are reminiscent of a soyjak zoomer.
>People don't know how huge mindbogglingly old pokemon is30 years for a franchise isn't old, it's quite young. Star wars is 46 years old, Star Trek is 57 years old, Mickey Mouse is 96 years old.
Only people that didn't witnessed the Pokemon craze in the 90s don't know how huge it was because it was inescapable, Zoomies first franchise I guess.
>many of these games have features that doesn't work anymoreOh gee really sherlock, guess what will be happening to all the Zoomer online games once the company pulls the plug because it doesn't generate any revenue. This is why you should always have a physical copy of media that you like, because you can't trust the companies with their own IP.
>can you still play these games without the nostalgia, all you have is the main game, the competitive scene doesn't exist and half of the features doesn't work anymoreWho in their right mind plays a pokemon game mostly for the competitive scene and the features?
The Competitive scene moves on as soon as the next game is released because they're consoomers and most of the features get dropped by Game Freak anyways and replace them with something new in the next generation.
Anybody that doesn't play a RPG for its main story or gameplay is a lost cause.
And everybody has to decide for themselves if they want to play the older games for anything else than the nostalgia dopamine kicks.
>I choose Bulbasaur because it's correctOkay autismo, just have fun.
>also Prof. Oak was ahead of his time for not assuming your gender, Trans Ally Prof. OakSeriously I turned the video off after that.
TL;DR I wrote a whole ass rant because I got
triggered by some nobody tranny on the internet
Nonnie why do you link a video of a Tranny mocking
TERF's?
No. 1809341
File: 1702411019272.png (227.77 KB, 1084x391, 1700016358249630.png)
>>1809337Forgot the image
No. 1809343
File: 1702411036113.gif (1.59 MB, 480x252, 1700297658000.gif)
I fucking hate moids so much I'm so glad that the concept of yaoi freaks them out I sperged about yaoi to one retard and thankfully he backed off from his clingy shit he kept spaming about hentai and degenerate shit to me despite me being clearly uncomfortable and even wording it out to him. I can't do this anymore fucking hell
No. 1809410
>>1805743Holy shit are we talking about the same person? Actually, I swear they’re made in a factory because I’ve seen this archetype of
>gay, misogynistic, condescending, narcissistic, smug, heavily opinionatedmoid a surprising number of times. They often also get into obscure hobbies just so they can be elitist over something and further drone on about how they’re always right and their taste is superior to everyone else’s.
Relating to what you were saying, this same moid also “befriends” women just so he can shit talk them to his gang of moid groupies. I know he’s collecting dirt and airing out their secrets just to shit on women and make them look worse to the straight boys he so desperately wants to win the favor of. He always has stories relating to “ackshually women are worse…” over everything because the beppies he talks to always have behavioral issues.
It’s like they only make friends with women to validate all of their gross opinions about them. They always go for the beppie girls, just to tell wild tales about how subhuman women are with examples.
I forgot another instance of this moid. There’s this one girl in our circle and she made some innocuous offhand joke (some silly nonsensical zoomer humor). Hours went by, and he left like a 4 paragraph textwall over how she never takes anything seriously, how she’s been a “problem” for a while now. It was insane. There’s a lot of moids who do exactly the same and much worse and he never makes a peep. I know he keeps tabs on all the women there and formulates reasons to seethe over them. I saw him reach his boiling point with one of them. And of course his replyguys hardly ever push back when he has an autistic mantrum.
Another thing he does is REALLY rag on pedos. Of course I’m not defending pedos here, they’re disgusting and deserve death, but it’s evident that this is the only acceptable outlet he has to shit on heterosexual men for their attraction to women (well, girls in this instance). It’s especially ironic since he himself is into femboys, traps, shotacon (but he’s never call them that, they’re just catboy twinks lol). He obviously doesn’t have an issue with the idea of being attracted to the underaged/barely legal for moral reasons. He’s just allowed to pretend to clutch his pearls when het men do it.
Ugh whatever I can go on about this faggot all day, hate him.
No. 1809438
>>1809343It’s funny you say this I just saw a DBZ fanboy have a melty over “the state of the dragonball fandom” because he saw a picture some fujo drew of Vegeta and Goku gayly embracing each other.
Moids are sooo emotional, sensitive, and lack perspective. They’re so used to the entire world catering to their sexualities and objectifying women. If they grew up as a teenage girl they would have killed themselves. Imagine being emotionally distraught over some tasteful bromantic yaoi, meanwhile every single woman on earth has been bombarded with the most grotesque and humiliating pornography nearly every single day of their lives and are just expected to deal w/it if not adopt the same behavior and pornify themselves.
No. 1809444
I can't find the advice thread but how do you all deal with a male you're forced to live with that doesn't pull his fucking weight in the house? My brother gets angry and shuts down when I ask for him to do a single chore now. Before, he'd say he'll do it later and then he doesn't end up doing it, resulting in rotting fucking dishes, grimy bathrooms, spoiled food because he didn't pack up leftovers, etc. because he decided his Minecraft time is more important than helping out. For context he's 21. He justifies his inaction with the fact that I get fucking fed up with this bullshit and yell at him, so he just doesn't do anything (something something, 'you should be asking me nicely. if you want me to do things.' I've tried that many times but he doesn't do shit lol). At the same time, he eats the food I buy because I handle groceries for my family, I cook most of the meals, and I do most of the housework anyway already. I am literally seething at the fact that this little fag does nothing besides go to school and hang out with his friends while living off of my money. I wish moving out was an option. I'm at my wits end.
No. 1809480
>>1809444Start compartmentalizing his chores. I think it’s the only feasible option considering you two live together and shit has to get done. Start putting his dirty dishes in a plastic tub outside. Stop cooking his meals and if you’re feeling extremely petty literally buy a lockbox for your fridge to put your food inside.
Moids are autistic and selfish as fuck and if he isn’t born with the capacity to care, he’s not going to develop it anytime soon if ever. He has the brain of an animal so just start treating him like one. Moids are all about logic and rules. You can’t just ask them to “be more considerate”, they literally do not know what that means. They understand a garbage bag full of his dishes that need to get done, though.
Males are very disappointing. Feels like you’re always bargaining with them to act like a human and treat you with sympathy but they just can’t, it’s even another chore in itself. You gotta start treating him like a dog.
No. 1809545
File: 1702415321612.jpg (361.71 KB, 1194x1600, 1000004890.jpg)
>>1809513I didn't know who that was so I looked her up. Why do mean pickme girls always have that look? I swear I can clock them from a glance. I'm 100% if I was interacting with her in group setting she'd make some passive aggressive comment or do a weird smirk face after something I said to imply I was being weird.
No. 1809572
File: 1702416189903.png (2.04 MB, 1920x1080, cute-ass-void.png)
Yo so this seems to be getting a little mixed up here but I wrote some cringey poertry and I thought a vent thread would the place to post it
The Void
>I love the void
>The void is consistent and safe
>I don't need to get better in the void
>I'm not worried about being robbed, attacked or raped in the void
>When I'm in my hole in the void, I'm safe comfortable and don't have to think about anything
>I don't want to think about anything
>My family wants me to leave the void but I really like it here, nothing hurts here
>I'm here
>I love the void
Like it, hate it, ignore it, do what you want
I it don't care. Void brahs got me
No. 1809631
>>1808938lmao this is so stupid
>>1808954what language is worth leaning to escape this?
No. 1809638
>>1809096nta but i've been reading lolcow for years. A lot of it lurking so I feel bad not participating more. There aren't many places like this.
I think a lot of people legit got worse during lockdowns. They went insane and became terminally online in a way they weren't before. More specific to lolcow though the drama boards have different regulars than /ot/ and /g/ and /m/. Lolcow's reputation is mostly based on it's drama boards and the reputation isn't a good one so it makes people not want to participate as much on the other boards because being associated with lolcow isn't a good look.
No. 1809660
>>1809535>>1809567It’s something I have realized in the last few years. I spent a lot of time toiling and bargaining with men because I thought I could convince them, somehow, to care. I have realized they just don’t have the capacity to. Caring and consideration are a product of empathy which they severely lack. It’s a fundamental, foundational issue. This is why when it comes to these kinds of things, chores especially, women end up exasperated. The issue is less that he doesn’t do his duties, the issue is that he isn’t inspired to do them out of consideration, love, guilt, duty, etc. These are all feelings most men have turned off by default.
I think most women would prefer a man who tries and fucks up (and I don’t mean weaponized incompetence here) over a man who had to get his teeth pulled to finish a task in a satisfactory way. This is something that men truly don’t understand. They don’t understand emotional connection and the value women place on being heard and understood. They just see tasks and whether or not they get done.
Most men are lazy slobs as well so it’s no skin off their ass if they live in a pile of trash, they don’t care, and they don’t care that other people have to clean up after him. Reminding him of your frustrations is just nagging, it irritates him. Because he literally just doesn’t care. He doesn’t think about you and how you feel. He has no empathy. In fact if he is very petty and easy to anger, which is common for men, he’ll make even more messes for you to punish you for reminding him to do them in the first place. If a man ever considers how you feel, it’s either to hurt you or figure out a way to manipulate you to his own advantage. He never considers how a woman feels to do something genuinely nice. He doesn’t value you.
They’re just animals, homestly. You don’t expect your cat to clean up after itself. Your cat doesn’t care if your house is a mess and they don’t care that they contribute to the mess. It’s not because your cat has thought about how you feel about it, weighed its options, and decided to hurt you. It’s a cat. The thought literally never crossed its mind, and can’t ever cross its mind because its brain is not advanced enough to be equipped with the ability to think about others in the abstract.
But men are human beings capable of speech, so you think they’re smart enough to listen, but they aren’t. They may be capable of playing video game Legos and ribbing with their circle of lifelong male acquaintances, but they aren’t capable of empathy. Something required to functionally live in a house with other people.
I may be exaggerating heavily but I do find it true. Most men are on a spectrum of laziness/autism and some are worse than others, but almost all show signs of the exact behavior I’m describing.
No. 1809696
>>1809660I want to add a little more here.
Because men are incapable of being internally motivated, force and/or ultimatums are required.
Men really seem to only understand very simple cut and dry rules, and only obey them under the condition that if they don’t they will be either punished or deprived in some way. i.e, “if I don’t clean my room mom won’t let me go to the movies tonight. If I don’t wash the dishes in the garbage bag outside I can’t eat” (however you’ll be surprised at how inventive they are in working around these rules. They’re just as likely to sneak out in secret and eat off of newspapers and use sticks from outside as makeshift forks lmao).
They do respond to positive external reinforcement as well but not as much. Men will usually only do things they don’t want if they’re under the presumption they’ll be accumulating strange pussy as a reward. As a man’s mother, sister, coworker, friend, or even his wife (ur pussy got old and boring) you won’t be lighting a fire under his ass 99% of the time.
Men are not spiritual creatures with involved inner lives. Being nice through inconveniencing yourself, without any reward/punishment involved, is a spiritual endeavor.
Asking them to do things out of kindness or genuine desire is literally asking them to change the chemistry of their brain. It’s an impossible ask, really, and women don’t get it because women are internally motivated by default. Women can be convinced to do things for unselfish reasons, for the abstract idea of a greater good, for the happiness of others, with no immediate personal benefit and no promise of a benefit in the future. Women can experience the feeling of guilt, men can only understand the consequences of being shamed.
No. 1809739
>>1809738this is basically my digital scratching post
keeps me from blowing up irl also i washed my hair hours ago and my eyes still sting and feel weird from all that product that got into them aaa
No. 1809749
I wish an 11 hour day consisted of lots of rest periods wasn’t so draining for my dumb weak ass. Oh well, might as well sleep.
>>1808761Please answer honestly, how old are you that you can handle such heavy drinking? How are you not passed out and in incredible pain, is it because you’re under 24?
No. 1809754
File: 1702423280317.jpg (57.67 KB, 720x681, FnixWYAEpwr.jpg)
I can't sleep, my alarm will ring in 5 hours and I randomly remembered my bullies and the treatment they gave me in both middle school and highschool, which made me sob uncontrollably.
I just want to dm all of them "kys" or something, which I know it's really bad to do so, but my God, I just want to be a horrible person for once, I somehow think it's justified but wrong at the same time. I sucked it up to these motherfuckers all the time and in turn I never thought I will get past the age of 15 (now 24).
Was I the weird and chronically online kid? Yes, I still don't get how I wronged any of them to be treated like that, I minded my own business usually drawing cartoon characters. Being pushed and beaten in recess, getting my belongings stolen and ultimately trashed, getting my food stolen, getting made fun of or interrupted during classes and teachers doing nothing (they even sided with the bullies and bullied me further), getting bullied out of my interests until I became a shell of myself, getting fake phone calls and weird texts on Yahoo messenger (these 2 were easier to manage, just with blocking kek) and many other stuff.
I know, it's pathetic to get moments like these after almost 10 years, but that shit left me crippled af. From ages 13 - 19 all I could think of was dying and "it's not worth it to take care of myself and my health everyone hates me and I'll die soon".
As a result, I have severe trust issues (and yes, the only person who can fix this is myself, but all these years are hard to undo) and I'm scared to ever be vulnerable or cry in front of someone (that's why my recent relationship ended).
On a side note, I'm grateful I had people and family around me who helped and listened to me at my worst and got a 2nd chance at life. This is the first Christmas in so many years that I am actually so excited for. It gets better, but I can't help and mourn sometimes the years I lost to severe anxiety and depression.
No. 1809812
>>1809752My deepest condolences nona. What a worthless piece of shit.
>>1809660>>1809696I'm the original anon and god, I'm screenshotting everything you're saying and saving it. It's empowering, and also deeply depressing. It's strange because I do have another brother that lives with us slightly younger but is my favorite because he does his work, is eager to help out and feels clear guilt when he's sitting on his ass doing nothing; he's an angel. I don't know what went wrong with the older one, so I'm pretty confident on the 'spectrum' existing. But nevertheless, most men really are animals with no empathy.
No. 1809823
File: 1702424945885.jpg (233.31 KB, 1280x1230, 1000001586.jpg)
I think I need to break up with my boyfriend. I love him dearly. Our personalities mesh so well together. But I can't handle all of the responsibility that he haphazardly places in my lap. He refuses to work. I have to handle everything for him as if I'm his mother. We are so impoverished right now because I can't take care of him on a single income. I can't handle all of this stress. I feel so miserable checking my bank account and seeing $1.22. I don't even know what we're going to eat today. I do so much to try to take care of him but I am feeling myself worn so thin. And he just doesn't do anything. He lost his job last year and he hasn't tried to find another one. I apply for things for him when I have the time but I feel like he fails the interviews I send him to on purpose. He keeps telling me he wants to be a house husband but that just isn't viable in this economy with my miniscule income. I really do love him but love really isn't enough in a partnership. I hate feeling like his mother so much.
The logistics of moving out are what terrify me though. I don't have any kind of support network to depend on. No friends, no family. Change is already scary enough, especially when our lives are so entangled but it's especially so when I don't have anyone to depend upon. But I can't just rot here together with him. I can't take this anymore.
No. 1809907
>>1809812>My deepest condolences nona. What a worthless piece of shit. Thanks for saying that. I legitimately struggle with just admitting to myself that she really died that miserable way, and that he's always been a POS. He makes the right sounds about being a family member, but doesn't follow through on anything. Men really are like dogs, some are just born with shitty defective personalities, and there's nothing anyone can do to fix them. In a better world, the worst of it would have been removed from the gene pool generations ago.
>>1809823Sell some of his vidya and hire a moving crew.
No. 1810128
File: 1702439819411.jpg (36.99 KB, 736x677, e8768b89d6feb5fb7dcb8a4531a28d…)
I'm such a retard thinking I would have made a non romantic connection with one of my old twink classmates turned jock nope I knew it was a bad idea even finding and texting him in the first place gosh men can't grasp the concept of friendship unless its with a other man.wasted my time and energy and i kind of don't have a muscle worship fetish anymore because of him.I hate how sometimes I want to text my old male classmates who I talked to a lot in elementary hell I even apologized to him for teasing him back then and this is what I get?blocked him and moved on,I could have been doing something better than being stuck in the stupid past of mine.men are such ingrates.
No. 1810298
>>1810290its crazy how helping a man overcome low confidence tends to backfire
no actually it is frustratingly predictable
No. 1810304
>>1808867I wish I could put him in his place already, but he was subtle enough that he could play dumb if confronted. He didn't hit on me directly, but I'm not stupid and I know when moids are acting weird. I really like this student and she's making a lot of progress lately despite her parents' break up, so I don't want to make it weird for her (I already pictured the mom trying to explain to her why we can't continue to do classes at his'… even though it'd be his fault, I don't want to make it harder for her). Next time I'll be even colder to him and try to mention that I live with my partner, maybe he'll get the message.
On a more positive note, the mom seems to be thriving now even though it must've been hard. I always wondered how he ended up with a woman so out of his league and I'm glad she's free now.
No. 1810317
File: 1702460843050.jpg (4.6 KB, 260x194, images.jpg)
Everytime I get in bed (to sleep or to read) I end up hyperextending my wrists. Dunno why it feels comfy while doing it. But it hurts so much afterwards.
No. 1810357
File: 1702467221338.jpg (Spoiler Image,276.99 KB, 1280x1280, FcrUIZzagAUS4-E.jpg_large.jpg)
>>1810317I'm sorry to scare you
nonnie but if you mean you're constantly popping your wrist by stretching the joint be careful about cavitation. I had a habit of constantly cracking my wrist and the liquid built up, I had to get the liquid drained and a cortisone shot injected into my wrist, it took around 3 years for the wrist to get back to normal without it dislocating anymore due to the constant popping.
No. 1810383
Finally got what I thought would be a life changing full time, permanent position job. I was way under qualified in my opinion so it was some sort of miracle that I got this job in the first place and it’s more money I should have been able to get reasonably. But it’s been pretty awful recently. Not totally unbearable, and a lot of my coworkers are the SWEETEST and I get along with them well so that helps, but the management is incompetent and these little things every day add up and stress me out.
Almost every day our department’s head will come over to us like 5-10 minutes before our shift is supposed to be over and suddenly start talking about a million different things, most of them not even that important or time sensitive, and he ends up talking for 15-45 minutes and making us late.
Also like all of the management of our department, all males, are all creepy and borderline sexually harassing people on our team. They touch the women way too much, not anything blatant like a literal butt or boob grope, but they’ll unnecessarily put their hand on your shoulder or touch your waist or your arm or something for no good reason. Just to “get your attention” or to tell you to move or something when they could have just verbally told you either of those things. Or even just in a “friendly” way for no reason. If it was my female coworkers I’d be fine but I feel creepy when it’s 45+ year old male management doing it. Also at parties they act more inappropriately, and they will constantly shove alcoholic beverages at you making you drink more and more, and then send weird messages which again aren’t blatantly inappropriate but just odd afterwards.
Then my manager got pissed and yelled at me for literally DRINKING SOME FLUIDS for like a minute when I hadn’t drank all day and walked 12k steps in 3 hours of my shift. Basically saying I was lazy for taking a “break” when everybody else was working, when that break was literally… getting a drink??? We only have one 1 hr break a day for lunch so am I not allowed to drink outside of that lunch break all day?????? Meanwhile he was the one who literally FELL ASLEEP during our work yesterday and always falls asleep randomly during work. He’s the lazy one. And a fucking creep.
Another of the management is literally older than my father and yet always makes creepy comments, or does weird things or shoves alcohol at me during work parties. During a morning meeting recently he literally whispered in my ear something like “you’re so beautiful every day.. just so beautiful” like… yuck. He also does the unnecessary touching and definitely seems like he wants to fuck me or something. And need I mention all of these dudes are married with multiple kids..
No. 1810417
>>1810385It's a little better now, it hurts less and I can move my neck but it's not my normal range of movement
>>1810386I think it was a crack
No. 1810432
>>1810293She’s not being a bitch or a narcissist from what you described, sounds more like she was irritated and said something a bit thoughtless considering your emotional state. You sound insanely upset, turn the emotions down if you can and take some deep breaths and use your rational mind.
What medical condition does he have? I want to understand why you’re so worried. You didn’t give details, “chest discomfort” is pretty vague. Normally that wouldn’t be a big issue, like maybe it’s heartburn or he pulled a muscle (I’ve done that, it feels bad but it’s no reason to see a doctor.) I would think if he had a condition he wouldn’t have moved states and not bothered to fix his insurance. Why can’t he get his birth certificate, are his parents withholding it? Are you sure he really needs it for health insurance I’ve never heard of that in my life. I have so many questions
No. 1810437
File: 1702474836537.jpg (16.49 KB, 563x381, 73143a70d6ccccf4fc803d56db134b…)
I always found the "I was forced to grow up too quick" thing pretentious but after I saw a picture about your "inner child" I realized I don't really remember being a child past maybe age 6 or so. My workaholic parents weren't physically or emotionally available and instead focused what little resources they had on my older sibling with mental health issues, my mom cried a lot in front of me, I was bullied in school a lot, I had no friends and I basically had to take care of myself since grade school. The worst part is that there was no grown up to help me work through my emotions and explain to me why I'm feeling the way I do or let me make mistakes so I ended up a damaged person with no proper understanding and control over my emotions and being hypervigilant over my safety, I can't depend on others because I have to survive on my own. I struggle to find a purpose in my life because I grew up feeling like I don't matter and now in my early 30's the situation persists. I've tried out a lot of things but nothing brings me a sense of belonging and I find it immensely difficult to forge genuine connections with people. I can't show weakness in front of others or ask for help because of my irrational feeling of being humiliated and punished if I do, I have a chronic feeling of hurry and not doing enough. It's such a strange feeling to be so disconnected from everything around me, like I'm a ghost. I never connected the dots until now. It's hard to believe that I could heal. Anyone else?
No. 1810472
>>1810458Yeah I thought as much, I will try drinking water and eating a salty food now before I try again
>>1810470I work very unsociable hours and britbong I've been in person to the clinic a few times and it's taken over 3 hours every time
No. 1810554
File: 1702481644073.jpg (69.23 KB, 1024x575, Serial-Experiments-Lain-promov…)
Anybody else pick a job based on a hobby and hated it? I've been programming in tech now for 3 years and it's killed all interest in it for me. Useless fake people and awkward moids every day. I want to quit and start over in something else but in my teens my mammy was driving me to Coderdojo courses every Saturday. Love her and I think it will break her heart if I drop it.
That whole do what you love and it won't feel like work is a load of bs. When you have to do it, it ruins it.
No. 1810625
File: 1702484317464.gif (204.58 KB, 256x256, aswmsc.GIF)
>be me
>trying to post something on /pol/
>YOU ARE BANNED*
>get directed to a pedo post my now dead brother made years ago
No. 1810632
>>1810627The usual females are most fertile when dadada, thing is this isn't the first time this has happened to me. Gotta leave place eventually, sick of seeing what abhorrent shit he did on this IP.
So like I said, pedo shit.
>>1810628It was something nice I promise nonna, the thread was job and economy centered anyways.
No. 1810640
My body is changing a lot by a condition (it's not lethal, I can reverse it) and my family doesn't understand why I'm feeling like shit over it. I don't want nobody to see me, I don't even want to take pics, I keep checking myself because it looks so awful, yet everytime I'm displaying slight sadness or an emotion other than happiness my family looks at me like I'm crazy and ruining the vibe, like I'm just supposed to be so happy about it. I miss my body and I want it back, I want to look normal again, I've to fight tears everyday and pretend I'm not distressed and sad, i avoid mirrors and use baggy clothing, so it doesn't affect me further. It's been a long time since I lifted my shirt without my heart sinking. I don't know why I feel like it's my fault when it isn't. My family is acting this way because they got told I can get outta this situation so they just tell me to suck it up until I heal, but I still feel like shit regardless, they treat me this way because they're not the ones going through it, they're not the ones living in a body that they cannot control. I just want to be honest for once: I don't like this and I feel awful, I'm not happy, my smiles are fake and my laugh is forced even when you think it isn't
No. 1810666
File: 1702485704185.jpg (131.39 KB, 797x797, bwo.jpg)
>>1810638>>18106391 He never acted on his tendencies, partially because he's frail as shit and all but I'd like to think he killed himself for a good cause, aka to keep himself from doing anything bad, or worse rather
2 I don't actually have any solid proof that this is him, but considering that it's under the same IP, and it perfectly aligns with his public world views, plus of course the fact that he SA'd me when we were young I'd be an idiot to believe it
isn't him
3 I posted about this months ago but now I'm pretty much over it lole
>>1810641Does nothing, but thanks
>>1810643Idk what you mean by this 2bh. It supports muh free speech, and that unfortunately attracts pedo misogynistic shit. But I am very much against all that.
And the main reason I even go there is to keep up with the pali israel news, ya know?
No. 1810680
>>1810670I know at least a dozen who have never paid medical bills but none of them make over 60k a year kek so
>>1810671 is probably onto something.
No. 1810698
>>1810683Only my mom knows and she told me to stfu about it, as for my brother he did a backflip off a cliff
jk hes not flexible enough for that
The part that sucks though is my dad is still justifiably grieving over it and I can't find it in me to be like yo, your son was a pedo
But then again there's just so many moving pieces at play here that it's just so tiresome to think about it at all, which is why I don't
I just need to cut off this bloodline to be at peace
No. 1810702
File: 1702486876246.jpg (22.63 KB, 680x383, 20111004madoka02.jpg)
>>1810666Oh snap it's real. I'm really sorry nona.
No. 1810711
>>1810293"since we and my parents live together"
You mean, you live with your parents and your nutjob nigel has moved in too
No. 1810717
>>1810293All things aside he probably made the right call not wanting to go. He's too young for a heart attack, 90% of the time at this age you literally wait a day and it goes away. If you go in they're just going to give a bunch of unnecessary tests and when they return negative go "hmmm I dunno are you anxious?". Maybe one of the minute clinics if the problem persists but this is NOT an ER issue
Also wtf you dragging your mother into this for, he's not her kid. Sounds like she was trying to fucking sleep and you kept waking her up this non-issue. Poor woman
No. 1810718
File: 1702487429489.jpeg (279.74 KB, 905x881, 1700361667609 (1).jpeg)
>>1810293You know what your post reminds me of? Those whiny, mollycoddled faggotrons from reddit who call anybody a narcissist for even slightly criticizing their unhinged thoughts or behaviors. You're talking about this situation like you and your boyfriend are two tortured souls in a harsh world, but the only person I feel bad for is your mom. She has to deal with a child having BPD-tier emotional intelligence with a faggoty ass boyfriend. God bless her soul.
No. 1810721
File: 1702487676801.jpg (118.68 KB, 735x760, keksimus maximus.jpg)
>Compare myself to others>'You know maybe I should stop, I'm alright'>What if that's my egoismI've been stuck in this mindloop for like 5 years does it ever end?
>>1810712I have no idea but this is about but picrel
No. 1810731
>>1810727NTA but don't fall into a guilt hole
nonnie. You did nothing wrong.
No. 1810892
File: 1702491675480.jpg (61.39 KB, 616x619, 1596757961666.jpg)
Sick of my sister and her moid. The two of them are staying over for christmas and it's starting to get to me. They're not the worst people in the world but I will be so glad when they're out.
They're both unemployed so they're staying until the new year. They stay awake playing video games and smoking weed all night and get up at 4pm every day. The house is big enough that it doesn't wake me up but they will cook a bunch of bullshit in the early hours of the morning and leave the kitchen dirty for when everyone else wakes up, and my sister will start sulking if she's expected to clean it up.
The two of them are also big gendies and talk about how queer they are all the time despite being a gender conforming straight couple. My sister has had like 5 different identical 'queer' (straight guys who wore nail polish sometimes) boyfriends who all ended up being toxic or literal sex offenders. This guy seems like a mostly harmless redditor autist at the moment but that's how they all seemed, so who the fuck knows.
All her friends are other similar straight couples, it's quite surreal since their supposed point in common is that they're 'queer' and they all moved to this historic gay city to meet other people like them. Other people who like doctor who and neon hair dye I guess.
She's picked up huge hypochondriac tendencies since I last spent time with her. She's convinced she's ADHD (possible) and autistic (probably not) and will talk about it all the time and relate every single behavior of hers to this. No diagnosis of course. And because she's deep into this mindset where more diagnoses could only be a good and validating thing she will tell people to their faces that she thinks they have xyz disorder, without any thought to how offensive it could be.
She'd never go full munchie though because she's way too arrogant, really smug about how supposedly talented and high IQ she is. She also used to use imageboards and retains a lot of that sort of attitude. She'll say pretty cruel stuff about me and my appearance to my face. I am not that bothered about it, but I know she'd never tolerate the same, at times when she was heavier than me, if I even mentioned calories just in relation to what I was eating she'd flip out.
No. 1810928
>>1810293It’s a lot of responses so I’m gonna try to explain some key things I saw.
1. It was 3am. I was really really tired. My mother was awake, she wasn’t trying to sleep really because she was casually hanging with my dad moments before with her/the house lights on. She fell asleep like 30 minutes after this encounter so she wasn’t that bothered.
2. I can’t get him insurance because he needs an ID for my state and needs a birth certificate to get an ID. Not sure if all states require birth certificates but my state does.
3. Yeah he was being a pussy and that was part of my irrational emotions, mixed with being tired and just humanly worried. I absolutely agree with people saying he was being a pussy and he should have been just direct and that would have stopped everything.
4. This isn’t the first time or even 100th time my mother has shown narcissistic tendencies but obviously no one here would know that.
5. I want to move out soon as possible but also my parents would be moderately financially fucked if I did. We help out as we both have jobs. I also never planned on leaving my parents until they died essentially and my mom always seemed 100% fine with that.
No. 1810935
>>1810892I will never in my life understand parents who let their kid live with them unemployed, not doing anything in return. Sorry you have to deal with that,
nonnie. Your sister sounds like a real loser.
No. 1810955
>>1810928Your boyfriend is a loser without insurance and without a state ID/birth certificate.
> I can’t get him insurance because he needs an ID for my state and needs a birth certificate to get an ID. Not sure if all states require birth certificates but my state does. You can literally go to the DMV and get your ID exchanged after moving to another state. How do you have a job with no insurance? Why do you have to be the one to get -him- insurance? Is he not a grown man?
No. 1811052
>>1810892They both sound insufferable, especially your loser sister. Sorry you have to deal with this
nonnie, I hope they will be out soon
No. 1811171
>>1811103Thank you nonna, I really genuinely appreciate your help and info. I had no idea banks had notaries. I’m going to try doing that. I just want to help and I know I’m stupid as fuck all for a 21 year old just trying to figure out how to do these bare minimum adult things.
>>1811098Yeah, this has stressed me out for a while…I just want to try to be a good person/girlfriend and try to help but it’s done an insane number on my mental health.
>>1811125You’re probably right.
No. 1811191
File: 1702502172253.gif (1.92 MB, 540x545, IMG_0280.gif)
>at store with cart trying to navigate around all the retards who insist on blocking the aisles
>try to swerve around this one woman who had a cart full of shit so she doesn’t hit me
>her bald scrote hugs her from behind and puts his body weight on her
>her cart hits me
>they don’t apologize and just blame eachother
I can’t imagine what they’re like in private Jesus Christ. But at least fucking say sorry.
No. 1811202
>>1811155>I don't want to go out with my dad… why? Because he's… LE CRINGEJesus christ no wonder he's still treating you like a child, you are one.
Just be nice to the boomer you ungrateful little shit.
No. 1811218
>>1811217Not disagreeing but this made me think…. Does any significant group of people outside of spaces like the chans, anime fans, kpop fans etc "glorify" them though?
One thing I can think of is how there's a normie meme Japanese are really pleasant, polite and friendly. I agree they're polite (mostly) but I never found Japanese people friendly, they're incredibly cold from my pov.
No. 1811224
>>1811211I will try. I love him but sometimes I resent him for working such long hours when I was a kid. Still feel 'safe' around my dad in a way I never have with a moid though, if that makes any sense at all lol. Also feel a bit bad now, I can be a total bitch to my dad but he never responds angrily, or loses his patience even in a tiny way. I said shitty things to him too when I was a teenager and he'd always just take it and say he still loved me and now I'm crying as well lol.
>>1811216Not underage.
No. 1811315
File: 1702508340568.jpeg (677.33 KB, 1179x1084, IMG_6713.jpeg)
>>1811290Why would he have emotional intelligence from going to rehab?
No. 1811316
>>1811313WHAT???!!! Why would you do that to yourself?
why aren't there any non-slutty farmers, I always feel out of place here since I'm a homebody who is afraid of men outside my family mostly but it feels like everyone else is some ex sex worker or one of those weirdos who got ran through by half of /soc/ and /r9k/.
No. 1811395
>>1811373This is giving me flashbacks to the time I
accidentally hit a kid with my cart in Walmart. I apologize on behalf of all walmart shoppers who didn't watch where they were going.
No. 1811403
idk if this is the right place to post this but it feels like it is. it feels like a vent overall. idk how to feel about it though in general
my roommate is a man who's been my best friend for 10+ years. he was the first person to accept me after peaking and eventually peaked as well, this was about 3 years ago now. ever since then we'd make fun of troons all the time, talk really in depth about it, feel horrified at the state of the world. that all changed until thanksgiving when he met a they/them nonbinary female. he isn't one who dates around, hasn't seriously dated in over 4 years, rarely feels a connection with someone but did with her. initially i was disgusted and felt betrayed in a sense cause.. how could you even consider her after EVERYTHING we've talked about? but re: he doesn't fuck around, and he's been having a really rough year, i wanted him to feel real happiness despite me disagreeing w/ her ideologically.
between then and now, we'd get into arguments over her where he'd they/them her to me, that'd annoy me so i'd be like "dude if you get serious you're going to have to make a decision about this. either you decide to lie forever twaw or you end it. and choosing the former means we cant be friends. and i dont mind that if it means you're happy but im not gonna be a part of that" and he'd go no no your friendship is too important to me i cant do that it isn't even serious right now it's been 2 weeks. alright then w/e. fast forward to today, he realizes he accidentally texts her a text he meant to send me where he calls her "her" 2 times, instead of "them". she responds poorly, seemingly is going to end it, and now he's spiraling only referring to her as a them saying how disgusting he was for ever disrespecting her like that and allowing me to make him do that. how cowardly he is for not standing up for "them" and how he doesn't see her as a woman. all because he fucking HER'd her!!!! i feel so… betrayed and annoyed and disgusted and angry it's like who tf have i been talkign to all these years? i know him and i know for him to say the connection is that strong, it must truly be. but i feel also like how can you even live that kind of life where you're now reverting back to everything you said you disagreed with. i don't get it. and he's saying he's either gonna kill himself or drink himself to death and how he's done taking care of himself, done with therapy, done trying. all cause a they/them didn't want to face reality of what she is. it's so fucking stupid man
No. 1811429
File: 1702517236045.jpg (33.17 KB, 720x218, Screenshot_20231124_143128_Ins…)
Men taking pride in being thieving whores. I hope he finds a woman who does the same to him so he can bitch and cry about it on reddit
No. 1811433
>>1811429I will take the ban but
>thumbnail is a black moidEvery single fucking time I read the most horrendous moid comments on social media, it comes either from this or a furry avatar. For my mental health, I just assume half of it is bots.
No. 1811468
>>1811422I left at 18 with the help of my sister and then at 19 moved to a cheap area with the help of a man and got a job that paid my tiny rent and bills and I became self reliant, walked to work but I still used his car to buy groceries because it was a car-dependent area in that department so he was still helping me. Realistically without him I would have moved in with another sister before becoming self-reliant on probably a similar timeline or maybe she would have made me go to school which could have been good but who knows that’s another time line.
I would have preferred living with supportive parents and I think that’s a better system and I see happier people around who did that
No. 1811475
>>1811192>They seem like that type of men who treat their own women fairly well and respectfully absolutely not, have you seen the way they treat their women who are simply
suspected to be feminists? they're like incels on steroids, there's been cases of assault and harassment towards women over the most benign things like making eye contact or having short hair
No. 1811510
ugh i feel sick and i'm shaking. my ex faggot friend texted me "thought about you hope you're doing good (smiley face)" i haven't been in contact with him for over 2 years because he was a piece of shit friend. it's just creepy he did that the day after i made a detailed post about him last night
>>1809974. i blocked his number. what a sick person.
No. 1811519
File: 1702525747071.jpg (16.42 KB, 275x265, 1693928264146.jpg)
i hate my best friends friend, he's such a condescending faggot when he talks to me. said person is also my boyfriends best friend so i can't avoid him sometimes. i try not to think about it until he says or does something that makes me genuinely seethe.
No. 1811522
>>1811316LC users either seem to be slutty bisexual regretful former sex workers or sexless virgins like you and the inbetween users are
terf lesbians.
No. 1811534
>>1811422I left for the first time at 20 with my partner and we had an apartment for a while, apartment kinda sucked and had paper thin walls and trashy neighbors but it was better than living at home with my narcissist dad. Moved back in with my parents after 7 months of that, my parents were extremely annoyed to have me back and their abuse kept escalating. I tried to kill myself 4 years after I had first moved out because I was still living with them and the abuse was getting worse and worse, I made multiple extremely poor decisions from 2017-2022 as a result of the way I was treated by them from 2016 until I finally got the fuck out in early 2020.
If I had supportive parents I would still be living with them. Sadly my parents would literally have a screaming fit if I went to the bathroom while they were sleeping, that was the level of shittiness I was dealing with on a day to day basis. Oh and if they were awake and had to use the bathroom while I was in there my dad would pick the lock (it was very easy and quick to pick the bathroom lock) and physically shove me out of the bathroom even if I was just pissing and was almost done. I’m still angry they treated me like such absolute shit, but I guess if they hadn’t done that I wouldn’t have been so desperate for my Nigel to buy a house, and then housing prices would’ve still skyrocketed and he’d be priced out from ever becoming a homeowner. He doesn’t make much more than he made in 2020 meanwhile the house is worth 75% more than we bought it for then.
No. 1811896
File: 1702564820662.gif (3.11 MB, 498x359, 1000006766.gif)
>ayce hotpot yesterday
>oyster night tonight
I love free food & the men who pay for it.
No. 1812095
Made it a little early sorry
NEW THREAD
>>1811981 No. 1812171
File: 1702578405381.jpg (144.47 KB, 723x800, zjwHc.jpg)
I wish some kind of massive anti-Internet movement would happen soon in my lifetime. I'm honestly sick and tired of this place and I want to find people who think the same.
I watch a lot of old documentaries and old interviews with people from the 90s and before that time, and most people can present their thoughts in a well-worded, more evocative way than what most people can present now. I know there are other factors that made them act this way, but they seem to follow this rule even when footage seems candid. Another thing is they seem to be enjoying themselves with far less than what we have now - many of them enjoy just hanging outside listening to some dude play guitar. I know this sounds like an old person complaining about phones but I'm baffled honestly.
I'm a zoomer, I remember the first time I got onto a computer was age 3. At kindergarten i literally asked where 'the computer' was (partially because of a very unique, very bad situation i was in though). And yeah, It fucked me up. In ways all of you obviously know. But maybe one of those things you might not realise is that it's been a literal safe space for me that doesn't only soothe my frustration with the world, but is much much more preferable to being out there in the first place.
I know a Net-Luddite movement wouldn't solve all of the problems that the Internet has created, plus it would remove the benifits. Honestly I don't need a solution to everything - I want a whole community of people who can enjoy being in the company of each other, maybe while being complete strangers, without the world revolving around this other space that isn't actually the real world. I'm basically saying, again, as a zoomer, I've never lived a life that wasn't completely consumed by the Internet. Maybe anons on the older side will reply that it was very boring or not special or worse - that's not the point, I just literally don't know what life is like without this… thing it's consumed by. And i'm not very interested in moderation. Can't there be any true radical movement with a good purpose?
The worst thing is, no one can really live without it.
Feels like I got majorly fucked up by something my brain wasn't even meant to process and I've lived my whole life not knowing what 'normal' is. Just feels bad, man.
No. 1812306
>>1812149Nonna
forgive. I had a dyslexic moment reading the post count, kek.
No. 1812390
File: 1702589536889.jpeg (29.05 KB, 600x600, 1624919596612.jpeg)
I have so many books left for the year, and while I'm a fast reader, I somehow can't read whenever someone's home or up because I constantly mind the door even though someone just randomly barging into my room happens wayyy less often now than it did like five years ago, so I'm just amassing more and more and I can't get the stack go down because I'm never really alone.
No. 1812887
File: 1702612852283.png (283.04 KB, 236x640, impossiblereach.png)
I'm so disappointed in my parents that I'm probably going to cry about it later. They drank enough alcohol to stink of it before we picked them up for dinner (Dad even brought a red solo cup full of booze into the car like he's some kind of frat boy! This is very illegal where I live!) Both of them were so rude to Grandma that I told them to leave her alone. They rolled their eyes or got pissy whenever she accidentally interrupted them or started a conversation with someone they were talking to (which maybe wouldn't happen so much if they spoke up enough to include her hoh ass in the conversation, but nooo. That's just too much effort.) They complained about her driving, muttering in the back of the car acting like they're oh so subtle and like I couldn't hear them mocking her and acting like they're going through such an arduous task being taken out to dinner by their own mother. Like seriously, you couldn't get this kind of entitled rudeness from a sitcom teenager.
The worst of it is that Grandma's just given up trying to get decent treatment from them. From Mom's perspective, she can't do anything to please Grandma, and from Grandma's perspective, she can't do anything to please Mom. They have their issues that are older than me, but Grandma's stopped trying to wrangle Mom for years and the way Mom's still fighting her makes her look worse and worse as a person. She wants me to still have a relationship with them and not to let their behavior get to me, but I'm so ashamed of how they treat her and the people they've become that I don't want to be around them. I love them so much but I'm ashamed, disgusted, angry, and just plain mournful of how they are now. This is the kind of thing that could make me believe in lizard people, because these are not the people who raised me. My folks always acted like Grandma's difficult, but I don't think she's difficult. I think they're difficult and they don't want to deal with her strong personality. I don't know. I like being with her. I wish I could still say the same for my folks. They treated her so bad tonight I was literally ashamed to share a room with them. I've never felt that way about anyone before. This sucks, so I'm gonna go cry and maybe shitpost. Love all you nonnas out there.