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No. 1791835
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Starting out by saying I’m in a stinky mood and I hope it doesn’t affect me when I’m hangin with the girls later!! Let me be cleansed of these foul vibes
No. 1791916
File: 1701166237199.jpg (95.47 KB, 951x531, based-chigusa.jpg)
I hate scammers. I hate so much. I had an indian scammer send me a fake norton email and I was not in the right state of my mind, I am dealing with my father in the hospital. I called the number because the email looked legit and then they proceeded to try (I said try) to get me to write them a message on note pad, so they could transfer me money from their chase bank account to mine. I hung up half way into the call, and ofc I should have hung up earlier. No damage was done, but my time was wasted. Even after I told the guy on the phone about my family in the hospital, he pretended to care and then continued to scam. I dont give a fuuuuck about seeming like I am racist, but indian men are the worst men to ever exist. they exist only to scam and they are a country filled with scammers. I have never in my life met any other demographic of men that are pure scum and just prey on other people.
I hate men. I hate scammers and i really, really hate indian men.
No. 1791918
>>1791864I'm convinced I'm on a exact wavelength as some anons because I was feeling the exact same way today, I literally cried in the shower because of it. I'm naturally skinny (barely 40kg at 5'2ft, very probably a thyroid issue) and no matter what I eat, I stay the same and it's frustrating. I'm sick of the "anorexic" accusations, eating until I feel sick to get curvier just for everything to get burn by my body in minutes. I hate the way my bones stick out, not finding clothing that fits me ever, I hate not feeling "soft", I hate my flat ass, b cup and small hips, I don't feel feminine nor attractive nobody checks me twice while walking down the street, I don't look like an adult woman I feel trapped on my 16yo body because I'm unable to look "grown". I don't understand how so many people would like looking like me. I hate myself so much, I feel like a freak and like I'm never enough. Everytime I see a girl that would prolly get hate here because she's "overweight" I wish I looked like her, she may have some extra weight but at least she looks normal
No. 1791920
>>1791911I'm so sorry anon, do you have any access to therapy? I understand that it's not that simple, but I wish you could be given the help you deserve
I wish subhuman scrotes who ruin people's lives like this could receive the same suffering they inflict threefold + castration.
The simple fact that moids value their own rancid coom so much higher than human rights and basic respect for life would actually make me murderous if I was as animalistic as males are. All I can do at this point is doomscroll and become frustrated and sad upon seeing y-chromosoid no. 274973 complain that not being allowed to enslave women is some sort of injustice while women and children are being raped and killed every second. The fact that useless incels are allowed to breathe at all is a testament to how broken and evil the world is. No. 1791934
>>1791916I feel you nonna. I got a scam email from the bank supposedly while at work and because I checked the email and URL on my phone instead of the computer like I usually do (to make sure the URL is legit) I almost gave them access to my account.
I just got lucky that I had forgotten the phone for two step verification at home, they only blocked my online access to the account.
But because it's the bank of where I'm from and I live 900km away in another country, in order to unlock the online access, I can only verify identity in a bank where I'm registered. So I have to take paid leave after New years to sort the shit out. It couldn't happen this month because I took a vacation in Burgerland for my birthday and thanksgiving, so now I have to play the waiting game over Xmas about the online access of that account.
No. 1791937
File: 1701170344169.gif (8.85 MB, 640x368, 1700194180916.gif)
THERE ARE TOO MANY MEN IN THIS COUNTRY!!!! DIE ALREADYYY
No. 1791957
File: 1701173605859.png (574.24 KB, 4000x4500, 1654734801078.png)
This stuff is just building up blah blah blah whatever.
My father is a paedophile who groomed, raped and was physically violent towards my mother and is now serving time for manslaughter, who has probably given me some sort of fucked up issues from his dusty sperm. My mother has severe BPD and was physically and emotionally abusive throughout my childhood, doing shit like hoarding animals, forcing me to take care of them and then threaten to kill the animals if I did something to upset her, as well as constantly trying to screen me for various mental illnesses because I wasn't being "friendly" towards her, to the point where I refuse to seek any kind of mental help now.
There is something definitely wrong with me but why waste the resources to fix it? I'm not going to hurt myself or others and I'm mostly okay with going on in this uninteresting daily loop, and when I do feel scummy it feels undeserved because my life isn't as bad as what other people go through, I could have it worse after all.
All my friendships feel one sided, I couldn't care less about them, I just go through the motions and that seems to be enough. They've all for some reason decided that I'm the person to vent to and they call me kind and whatever for just sitting there and making empathetic noises. When I vent about to them about what I consider very minor things they typically don't know how to respond, which makes feel selfish, or maybe that I'm some sort of emotional sponge to them.
I don't have many belongings nor hobbies or anything, I was going to kill myself earlier this year but realised that I'm not important enough to do it. I don't particularly want to get into any relationships, there's nothing that me or a partner could provide to one another anyways.
But whatever, life goes on until it doesn't and I don't care if I die in my sleep or wake up tomorrow. It doesn't make a difference to me.
Apologies for taking up more space than I should, I know this is an anonymous space and that's the only reason why I'm writing this all out, I don't want to be comforted and especially not by people with names, but everyone's situations seem far more serious than mine and in a detached way I hope everyone comes out alright in the end.
No. 1791978
File: 1701176718296.jpeg (64.14 KB, 750x875, 47593828-F044-4D41-BA8B-A835AE…)
>>1791957noña, sorry I’m not eloquent, I don’t know what to say but you made me tear up a little because it’s too relatable, detaching from emotions to get through the day. I hope you can find something that makes you happy soon ♥ everything is relative and your problems matter, however small you may think they are
No. 1792029
File: 1701182918739.jpg (68.88 KB, 640x463, 1700500134723.jpg)
>have dental insurance from uni
>yatta finally can get wisdom tooth removed
>doesn't cover impacted tooth surgery
ok damn
No. 1792034
>>1791861I feel you
nonnie. Don't want to be here.
No. 1792036
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I think my ex’s ex is going to leave her new boyfriend for him. She’s been interacting a lot with their mutual friends online recently which isn’t too weird on its own. But his dad recently re-followed her on his instagram (it’s a business page but still) and I’m really confused. I think she’s wanting to eject her current relationship and go back to my ex who is a completely codependent doormat. She posts boomer tier inspirational quotes about being a good person to mask her out of control personality disorder. Her current boyfriend used to be all smiles but is now dead eyed and tired in every picture. My ex never disparaged her but the way he was acting made it very clear something was deeply wrong. He also would say he expected me to do some really fucked up shit out of nowhere during arguments. Him and I could’ve been really happy together but he hates himself too much for that and she gives him a reason to be miserable. I can’t compete.
No. 1792047
>>1791864Prime example of why I don't feel sorry for disordered people.
It's not hard to eat and drink calories which makes you sound like those lardasses who believe their bodies are also exceptions to calories in and calories out. Except fatties aren't even this hateful towards thinner women anymore. Wtf.
No. 1792085
>>1792063If you consume calories you will gain weight. Simple as.
Whining about not eating enough is the epitome of a first world problem.
No. 1792091
File: 1701186359311.jpg (60.69 KB, 545x453, K5V1tivim4o2_640.jpg)
sorry for the explicit topic but i hate moids who are into anal so much!!! why is it such a normal fetish for them??? i admit that i'm a virgin and never had a bf but i hate how i had to grow up hearing stupid jokes from guys and i know how many want to do that kind of stuff.
it's not like i have a lot of hopes for men irl but ugh the concept of it is so disgusting, i know i'm into things that aren't the best either but wanting to do anal is such a stupid disgusting concept i don't care what you do to make it safe or clean or whatever.
If i will ever find a man i want to be with and he even tries to propose that i'm going to ship him to Antarctica.
No. 1792119
>>1792098I swear that the whole "it's degrading" thing is so stupid, i kinda get it but in the end they are sticking their penis in a place someone shits from lmao how is that supposed to make them look better? At this point they should be into nostrils or something, it's just as disgusting.
I would never want to deal with a man that wants to/has been in someone's ass.
Like idk congratulations moids for finding pleasure into slamming into someone's most disgusting body part wow you are so much more respectable and stronger than them.
No. 1792171
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Seasonal depression sucks. I have a job interview lined up, I'm excited about it but also I can't even pull myself out of bed in the morning. I hope a sense of responsibility will make me feel better.
No. 1792202
>>1792169Right?? I've heard it's dangerous also because of all the bacteria and stuff. Would they even clean themselves well in-between? Of course not, and it's not like you can just ignore those dangers.
Aside being gross anal is really stupid, actually moids are just very stupid.
Imagine them penetrating some tiny sewer pipe and then they think to themselves "wow this sewer pipe is so stupid and hot i can't believe it's letting me do this i'm dominating every aspect of its being" lmao how can't they realize how unattractive they sound when they normalize being into something that gross.
I don't blame gay moids too much because they don't have other alternatives but imagine being with a woman and wanting to chose the worst possible option.
No. 1792207
>>1792184I'm sorry
nonnie, you'll make it through. We both will. It all feels useless right now but once spring rolls around it might not be.
No. 1792282
>>1792278Damn. That sucks,
nonnie. I hope you’re able to find new and better friends soon.
No. 1792423
File: 1701205915850.jpeg (93.69 KB, 501x550, 1699639709047.jpeg)
>buy item secondhand, message seller since i did a BIN and didn't wait on bidding
>seller sends invoice 24 hours later with a note they'll ship it out friday
>pay immediately
>they don't ship it, don't let me know there's a delay either
>messaged them to check in if there's a tracking number on the selling site and on paypal, they ignore me on both and leave it unread
>finally put tracking number on paypal days later
>"label created, awaiting item"
Is basic communication an impossibility?? All I ask is to be told if a package is going to be delayed and when it's actually been shipped out, this bitch didn't even message me a simple hello, thanks for buying etc.
I shouldn't be salty over this but when I sell I do everything I can to communicate, it just feels like a dick move to ignore messages and not give updates on packages. I haven't hounded them or anything, there's no reason they'd ignore me other than being stupid and rude.
Probably just stupid and unintentionally rude. But I get so anxious over packages + lost money sometimes that this is driving me insane because they haven't said a word!!! I hate being this anxious over money and getting screwed over and it makes me mad they're so impolite.
I have anger issues.
No. 1792580
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I fucking hate being in a vtuber community(she's a hololive streamer )that's fucking 95% moids just because I actually like a streamer who's my oshi, I'm pretty open being a woman(big mistake) but fucking hell the amount of times I've gotten creepy ass fuckers(i don't know what else I expected)just because I draw fanart, telling me how good it'll be for them to have a gf with the same interests I'm so close to never interacting with the community again I fucking hate it i want to tell all of them to alog so bad I just wanted to like the streamer but fucking hell I hate her moid fans so much I'm so close to deleting my account
No. 1792610
>>1792558Scrolling through social media isn’t stalking if it’s a public account. It’s weird if you’re constantly monitoring some girl you know IRL Instagram and all of her public friends accounts but it’s not stalking imo if it’s all public, still can become pathetic very fast. Users here? Probably mostly just social media stalking you can just read the unhealthy obsessions threads. Anons here are tame compared to some of the things the teen girls I knew in high school would do towards the girls they didn’t like.
>>1792583I have now, I love the picture of her at the table with a picture of the guy she shot in the hospital kek.
No. 1792835
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I've never been a religious person. But I believe I saw an angel for the first time. It was a pure white energy, glowing, shaped like a person, surrounded by a purple mist. On seeing this, I felt incredible warmth and love in the pit of my stomach. My memory is a bit hazy on what happened, but I realised there must be no hell, because the powers that be are filled with so much love they wouldn't wish harm on anyone. This love gave me so much confidence, powerful wisdom. I gained the strength to heal from my past. More wisdom then I have gained from any therapy or counselling session. I understand now that all everybody wants is to be loved. At first I thought this angel must be a woman, and I was experiencing the love a mother has for all her creations, but truly it seemed genderless. I also saw a horse galloping. My description won't do it justice, but it was a very majestic white horse, phasing in and out like seafoam.
No. 1792858
>>1792837You better pack up and move out of the
Milky Way then
No. 1792914
>>1792866Hm kinda. It happened a few days after I took MDMA. After the comedown I took a very high dose of ritalin to see what would happen. Idk if that makes sense my memory is all over the place sorry.
>>1792869Nah I was very much wide awake.
No. 1792981
>>1792970Damn nona i kinda relate in general, i'm sorry you're feeling like that.
I admit i also get issues seeing mostly overweight women in that but i don't really hate them lol, i just think it's generally unfair because there are plus sized versions for most things while being busty and skinny feels like a curse.
I don't want a gnc look but i used to when i was younger, sorry if i have no way to help but i wish you to find ways to feel better soon, i'm still very conscious of my breasts and all the things it caused.
Sometimes what helps me calm down is that i want to get better with it all in case i will have a daughter with these issues, or that when i will be old i will not care much about it or regret how it controlled me and didn't get to enjoy myself.
No. 1793010
>>1792970No. Being skinny with big boobs is awesome. I could not image staying mad about that past my teen years, you get used to it and stop hating yourself for no reason.
>online space for women with big breasts is overrun with fatties.What are you doing? Forget fat ladies, how is a big-booby-lady online space not 99% coomer males? I hope it's locked and voice-verified or you're just writing comments for men to jerk off to. Even if it is protected, you cannot get a bra sized online so it's a stupid waste of time to talk about it online. Buy a tape measurer or go to a bra shop and have the lady there measure you.
No. 1793047
>>1793029Sorry if this is too unsolicited for you but
I grew up in an emotionally meshed and abusive family, my mother is similar to yours and would criticize my looks as I got to grade five/middle school, along with any achievements. I got mono and she was convinced that I kissed a boy (I had never kissed anyone, we shared drinks in middle school) and when I kept denying after her barrating, she said I was too ugly to have one. Mothers who grew up without emotionally supportive women in their lives tend to hate their female children as they grow and see the reflections or fear-monger their worries on them. Being upset that their daughter could possibly do better or is then they were. They are insecure and will try to tear you down or justify their insecurties. (Criticizing your weight, needing to be 'better', buying oversized clothes, etc.) It is bullying and a form of intimidation, you did not cave in and know your worth- this is the first step to breaking the cycle of abuse. Even the underwear thing to me, screams that she is stuck in her adolescent age and brain, trying to relive her days through you. Very odd and uncomfortable. Comparing her traumas to you are an attempt to diminish your struggles, but emotionally healthy people can recognize both struggles are valid, but hers are not yours- and you are not her parent. Sending love. No. 1793067
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Mother insists on buying "sugar-free" ketchup and it's as gross as it sounds. Imagine the thinnest, cheapest brand of tomato soup and then mix in some stevia–that's what this shit is.
She "doesn't want extra calories" in a bid to regulate her weight in her old age. Except she snacks on carbs constantly. She smokes almost a pack of cigarettes a day!
But you know anons, fuck me, we just don't deserve Heinz lest to suffer the 20 whopping calories per serving which will surely lead to our own episode of 600lb life /s
Moving back home is a special kind of prison. I did everything I could to avoid moving back here yet here I am regardless of my efforts.
The least I can say is that she is nowhere near as mean and narcissistic as she was when I lived at home in my early 20s. She must have realized that I will be the only one to care for her in old age and be emotionally available–which she has taken full advantage of with trauma dumping and rambling to me almost every day. She's alright now but it does not make this situation any less frustrating. Worst of all I feel like I cannot say anything and just take it, maybe if I were still 19 I wouldn't have a problem popping off at her but nowadays I feel like eating this shit is the "mature" thing to do…but still.
I have to answer to her whenever I come and go and she purposefully has not given me a key yet to further reinforce my reportability to her.
She's retired so she constantly hogs the living room and tv all day, which means I exist to wake up, go to work, and then sequester in the beige guest bedroom with no stimuli except my phone as everything else is packed away until I fall asleep from boredom. My friends have lives and partners. No man I have tried to meet is worthy and/or wants to build something together or wants to make me sugar momma bangmaid. So escaping this situation won't be possible anytime soon.
I can't even cook, the one chore "hobby" I enjoy, because she domineers the kitchen and acts visibly annoyed whenever I am inside it even though I clean up after myself. She accuses my food of being "too spicy" and so I am punished with her grotesque, bland geriatric food which apparently I cannot even mask the flavor of with NORMAL PERSON KETCHUP.
No. 1793087
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Everyone is trying so hard to come across as cynical, it's genuine annoying. Is it wrong to just have some fun? I wish some guys could have a more "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" mind set.
No. 1793113
Jesus Christ, women are such a notorious male worshippers, especially teenage girls. These ones can't be conceived otherwise no matter how much you try. I saw a teen saying she would kill for her boyfriend and that people assuming she doesn't love him makes her wanna self harm, what the actual fuck, she said it like 50 times. She flexed on not denying her boyfriend the best oral sex of his life, women will literally do for men the most degrading acts only pigs do and hunch over dicks like a slaves, all the filth, dirt, pain, how deformed it makes their face look to please a moid doesn't matter as long as they get what they love the most and what their sexuality revolves around-male pleasure. Do you fucking like pain? They are so devoted to men that they literally bow down to them. And ofc, he's older than her. Am I gonna have to see this for the rest of my life? She keeps fucking bragging about it meanwhile nobody fucking asked. Stop over sharing online. Is it some humiliation kink(she said to one moid online once that he shouldn't humiliate her because she has a bf to do that for her)? Probably? Is she creating a fucking altar for the worship of her moid? Did she made her whole acc as a tribute to her fucking moid? What is going on?
The insane, mind destroying humiliation doesn't move women, it's like women sexuality is "reactive" it reacts to male pleasure or desire and is invoked by it. Imagine being a man, having a person who's whole psychology revolves around pleasing you and who's trained to deliver pleasure mentally from acts that don't serve them physically but serve you. Literally designed to degrade themselves for you and be satisfied by it. Women see men as gods, especially young women, it is so over. And she keeps talking about her love with him. Life is disgusting and doing this disgusting acts and physical movements stays in your brain and memory if you do it long enough, which makes it all even more fucked up. They are training themselves. Good luck trying to make misandry possible. All life ever is, is male worship. Everywhere, all the time. Plus he's racist but she likes it. It reminds me of women here who get wet because their bf hates troons.
No. 1793143
File: 1701242165971.jpeg (90.88 KB, 750x670, IMG_0407.jpeg)
a guy pulled a gun on somebody the train today. I was right next to him and if hehad started shooting i probably would’ve been first to go. I can’t turn my lights off or I’ll start crying again. I need to sleep but I can’t stop hearing them yell at each other
No. 1793164
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Modern men have a crazy inflated ego. This creature was saying more and more women are old and lonely and that women are too picku bc they dont want men who treat then like shit. Like bro, not even your mom loves your face, where is the ego and thinking you can say anything about ending up lonely coming from? Like worry about your own loneliness, no woman will ever love you.
No. 1793169
i’m locked in the total limbo of smoking heavy weed, nicotine, repeat and i’m ngl there’s literally nothing else i look forward to in life right now aside from smoking. idk if it’s a habit intensified from ocd but i smoke weed all through the night, morning, all day, if i’m not working. i’ll even smoke before my intensive stylist job. so i get all my work done despite this. but my whole reality and perspective, perception too, is altered and idk what i am or my life is anymore. i started smoking a few years ago after trying my whole life to cover up the pain of my brother sexually abusing me as a kid. it just got so out of control and it’s my whole life and totally has taken me away from my interests. i used to love and care about art, now i don’t care. i used to constantly listen to music and now i don’t hardly ever. i don’t try and make friends at all and i’m so remorselessly cold with people when i get bored with them and wanna focus more on getting stoned, i’ll just ghost people and never reach out. on top of that i’m not even interested in anyone sexually or romantically and feel like nobody will make me feel better than i feel when i’m alone and high. i’m genuinely curious if there’s another girl out there as addicted to weed as i am and smokes like me, cuz right now i feel like a total weirdo. like i can’t find a reason other than being high. it makes me feel almost like a crack addict sometimes because the weed here is so strong. i just want to be normal so bad. i lost this intuition i had before where i could almost “feel” my surroundings way more, i would reflect on things and time felt so different. now everyday feels like its own isolated incident that i can’t even remember the next day. i wish i never started in the first place
No. 1793192
>>1792614That woman reminds me of the anon here
>>1792622“It happened to me in middle school so now I’m allowed to do it to you!” Fuck off. That’s exactly what I’m saying. I’m not your punching bag just because YOU were bullied for your figure and weight.
No. 1793231
File: 1701255329815.jpeg (24.57 KB, 550x550, 71e3340e1cfc438848630220646fc8…)
I know it's through the lens of my non extensive experience, but I got to a point of hating romantic relationships (both with men and women), it feels like a prison to me.
And no, it's not because of commitment issues, it's more of a "you have to give up your identity, routine, friends and family just to get love" type of mentality and that shit's expected in both types of relationships or maybe it's just the moid and the woman I have been with, I don't know. I shouldn't be so pessimistic and doomed, I have been in only 2 relationships for fuck's sake, but the thought of entering another one makes my skin crawl.
I have been transparent with the fact that I am a busy person, I am awkward and have a really hard time expressing my feelings and showing affection due to years of bullying and emotional abuse and don't like texting that much, but I tried my best compensating with getting to know them, about their hobbies, fears and fav artists etc. and memorizing every little aspect about them or sending a cute meme or picture that reminded me of them. But it still wasn't enough, which in a way is understandable, but you tell me that you love me and you find me beautiful one second and the next one you post on your story memes like "oh I have such a bad gf", or when I ask what's wrong and trying to help you go like "you never listen anyways".
And if I think about it, they both know pretty much nothing about me, besides surface level shit, not even my fav artists, interests or the extent of my abuse and never had patience with me but both demanded me to say and do affectionate stuff (glad I never had sex) when they wanted, never asking if I'm comfortable or not or letting me when I wanted and felt safe to do so.
I knew there was something wrong with me, but not to that extent kek. I sometimes crave affection which is normal I guess, but I got to the conclusion that I really am just unloveable and only a cute face to have around. Being vulnerable that way is so goddamn dangerous, it can always be turned against you just because you didn't do what they wanted once.
No. 1793244
>>1793233i'm lucky that we don't live in the same house right now. i don't really know what's stopping me from leaving or getting help. I guess I'm just tired and afraid. I also don't want my family to find out about it.
I'm trying to be brave and get away tonight. But I'll probably cave eventually. They say it takes an average of 7 tries to really leave for good… i will keep trying
No. 1793248
>>1792981Aw thanks nona, we got this. I was just really frustrated last night because I properly measured myself for the first time ever and my bra size is a lot bigger than I expected.
>in case i will have a daughter with these issuesYou're so sweet, and you're gonna be a great mother. My mom is the boomer villager type that doesn't shave or wear bras so I've always had to fend for myself when it comes to figuring out when to wear bras or what size to get. It sucked when I was an early bloomer teen and it sucks now in my late 20s.
>>1793022I've thought about it but I actually like my naked body and I don't really want to go under the knife and change what I naturally look like. I only have a problem when I'm wearing clothes. I'll probably have to do it in the future out of medical reasons though because I've had chronic back pains for a good decade now.
>>1793010"Being skinny with big boobs is awesome" but then in the next breath you talk about the disgusting fetishization men force on women with big boobs kek ok genius-chan. How is it awesome to be sexualized just for wearing normal clothes and told you're dressing unprofessionally because scrotes can't stop staring at your 3cm of cleavage? And everything
>>1793027 said. You sound like a teen yourself if you don't understand why this is something that makes women suffer.
No. 1793254
>>1793244Nta, thank goodness you don't live in the same house as that moid. I suggest running to the nearest abuse shelter and get some help from volunteers and take some legal measures if it's possible. There should be someone that might help you. I also suggest changing your phone number when you will run from that moid, I think you can get a free sim card if you don't want to pay for credit.
If the situation is dire and your family is supportive, contact them even if it's daunting. I think they would rather help you even if they don't like the situation at first than to find out their daughter is severely abused (again, if they are people with common sense).
You've got this,
nonny.
No. 1793269
File: 1701259576854.jpg (40.23 KB, 807x659, tiresome.jpg)
My husband took a massive shit, blocked the toilet and then left for work.
No. 1793308
>>1793232>you're fat!Predictable response.
>you wanted to punch down and blame some random anon because some strangers were shitty to you about your looks.Because I said that you will get hate no matter what you look like, and being curvy doesn't mean you're perfect and won't be belittled?
>>1793192Do you think women only get criticized for their body in middle school? And no, I don't ridicule people for how they look nor did I do that in my post.
I didn't have to be so rude and call anon a moron, but I still stand by what I said.
No. 1793593
File: 1701282530624.jpeg (108.99 KB, 768x576, Fx9lwx2XwAIQmk_.jpeg)
I am so tired. I cannot remember having had a happy day once in my life. I have never connected to anyone, no one knows me. I don't have a single person close to me. I feel so alone and I'm scared. I cannot be my true self here, where I live, because I could legitimately be murdered or worse, I've been faking my whole self since more than a decade. No one knows me and I am starting to feel disconnected with the world and somehow with my own self too. I feel so lonely. I just want to get out of here, I want to feel like myself. Nothing I've ever said or done in real life has been me, doesn't that mean I don't exist? I feel so weird and disconnected and floaty and like, I'm somewhere else… I don't know how much longer I can tolerate this. I set a timeline that if I'm not out of here by 30, I'll kill myself and this has keep my suicidal thoughts at bay, but I can barely make ends meet every month so the dream of getting out looks more impossible each other. I hate every single thing about my life. I feel so lost and alone.
No. 1793597
File: 1701282871207.jpg (132.19 KB, 1000x842, 1665193205877109.jpg)
>>1793169I used to mix rolling tobacco into the bong hits I took all day every day starting upon waking. And I'd take edibles at night, too. It really does take the joy out of everything else in life. Let me warn you though it will destroy your skin same as cigarettes do and once you get out of your 20s the stoner lifestyle is very much not cute, the people around you will be losers and not cute, and they will drag you down with them unless you can elevate yourself.
I firmly believe you can find healing, personally I have been completely clean now for almost 4 months. This is the longest I've gone without weed now in about 16 years, since I started when I was 18.
Partly I was motivated by finances and partly shallowness, and I also leaned hard into doing hot yoga all the time. Trust me it's way more liberating to not be dependent on it.
No. 1793645
My phoned is officially busted, I have to take at least 300 out of my savings now to get a decent used one. I'm so tired nonnies.
>>1793597>it's way more liberating to not be dependent on it.You said it sister. Quitting any substance isn't fun but once you don't have to take it anymore it's so freeing.
No. 1793669
File: 1701287396945.jpeg (71.47 KB, 732x549, IMG_1595.jpeg)
i genuinely hope my husband dies so I can finally be free.
No. 1793677
>>1793672i live in India, the culture is different here. I'll be disowned by all my friends and family and become a laughing stock if I divorce. Plus, I have nowhere to go. I have no money, I can't run away because of too many risks out there.
at least if my husband dies people will feel sorry for me and I can keep the house.
No. 1793683
File: 1701288172740.png (218.48 KB, 500x489, NICO NICO NAAAA.png)
my dads trying to get me to mend his relationship with himself and my older sister. literally ever since my parents split up when i was 11 ive been the go to middle man. not sure what to do since im his only child who still speaks to him, just kinda feeling tired of it.
No. 1793686
>>1793677Sorry to hear that, anon, maybe you can make things go
faster, like in minecraft or something, you know
No. 1793729
>>1793688it sucks. I have to be his slave. I do everything for him because he's stupid lazy with nothing in return. He spends all his money on stupid stuff he hoards, alcohol, and gambling and gives no money to me. Yet he complaints and yells when i don't buy and cook fancy food every day. I get regularly exhausted because of the amount of housework he makes me do and he beats me whenever I don't do enough according to him. He's never shown me a single crumb of appreciation , ever
every day I inch closer and closer to setting myself on fire, but then I think, maybe he'll finally die of bad driving or alcoholic or something, or he'll finally decide that I'm really not good enough, for real (instead of just telling me) and leave on his own. But then I wake up yet another day and he's still alive. I can't bear the thought of 40-50 years more of this. It's only 5years and I've already become a husk. I want to scream.
I don't even live in some bumfuck nowhere village, but in a medium sized town. This is just life in India I guess. i wish I was born in literally anywhere else.
No. 1793732
>>1793067>Moving back home is a special kind of prison. I did everything I could to avoid moving back here yet here I am regardless of my efforts. same kek i hate being here
those six years i spent in the city living paycheck to paycheck and stressed out from uni were hell compared to this. if i get this job i swear to god i'm moving out asap, i wish i had a cool mom to build a nest egg around but her cruelty and narcissism is just too fucking much
No. 1793743
>>1793729praying he dies in a flaming car crash or gets a crippling disease
nonnie, sending death his way for you xx
I seriously hope you are doing ok, I live in Canada and the area I'm in has a strong Indian community and this is a common occurance about the DV and arranged marriages here too No. 1793748
File: 1701290970342.gif (1.09 MB, 500x281, 7cb.gif)
>take keys from mother to go to car to do an interview so i can have some privacy
>she has two sets
>i take the set i see there in the key bowl and go do the interview
>come back inside
>put keys directly where they should be, where i got them from
>minutes later
>she can't find her keys (the set with the house key on it)
>get yelled at for an hour that i never put her shit back (despite literally just doing that, putting things back)
>she finds her keys in her purse, i somehow put them there (??)
>now opening up my packages even though i've asked her not to do that and rambling on about the stuff in there
just another day in my life me
No. 1793753
File: 1701291263065.jpeg (21.21 KB, 400x673, rs=w_400,cg_true.jpeg)
my coworkers are retarded and tried to park her car in front of an electrical box but we do construction and when she was like "is this ok theres no sign" and I was like "no the sticker says 10m" and my other coworker was like "ur fine everyone does it" and she was like "teehee if everyone can do it its fine" and I was like "you guys the sticker says 10m and we literally do traffic control, how do we expect people to follow our signs if we cant" like these ppl must be. how are you going to constantly get mad at people doing 'monkey see monkey do' but then do the exact thing? I hate traffic control, I would have never gotten in it if I could actually afford going back to school.
No. 1793754
>>1793696Not yet so ig I’m not positive its a uti but I’ve got the burning and consistent feeling I need to pee so presumably thats it
>>1793721No I’m not on any medications period. I only have sex once every couple months and do it with a condom at a safe point past ovulation but it seems almost every time I have sex I get yet another uti
No. 1793763
File: 1701291791716.png (639.75 KB, 800x500, Traffic.png)
>>1793753also on top of that my coworker and I exchanged "good mornings" and then looked at my shoes and was like "wow its time for new shoes huh" and the only thing I said back was "are you going to buy them for me?" kek to which she just exclaimed/was baffled and was like "Oh." like what the fuck ? I do not care about you or your clothes, so why do you make comments about mine? Not sure if this shit is like HR worthy but they always say I " need to be nicer " and my only comment is "I'm here to work, not socialize" I have been friendly with them but they are very terrible at their jobs and very lazy. If I need you to move a cone I will simply say "can you move that cone?" Not "hii can you pleasee move the cone for me
nonnie?" like, I did not get into safety for customer service LOL
No. 1793810
File: 1701295844957.png (682.75 KB, 640x464, IMG_3471.png)
I’m the fucking retard for putting my mental and physical health in jeopardy and allowing myself to go $10k into debt for other people who I thought loved me. I did everything except wipe asses and now when I’m needing support it’s not there. Even when I ask it still feels like a fucking chore to receive the bare minimum. This is my wake up call to stop being a fucking doormat for everybody. They will leave you dying alone in bed before even thinking about doing something kind or helpful. No more favors, let them starve and struggle on their own.
No. 1793817
File: 1701296342098.gif (2.25 MB, 498x280, frustrated-charlie.gif)
>America hates traditional values!!
>Women are so unfeminine now!!
>Older generations appreciated their children and husbands!!
>Coming home to a trad woman would keep any man from cheating uwu
I'm losing it. How are people this dense.
No. 1793857
>>1793830Dennis looks ok (dude always had a massive forehead). At least his is all filled out. but I can see why Mac won’t slick his hair back in the new seasons anymore.
Oof.
No. 1793887
File: 1701301942323.gif (713.61 KB, 430x260, crazy-cr.gif)
My hatred for druggies is slowly being bypassed for my hatred of in-denial alcoholics. "I don't drink" is a full sentence yet they want to poke and prod only to get angry at your responses. It drives me crazy.
No. 1793907
File: 1701303133633.jpeg (626.8 KB, 1125x1287, IMG_4141.jpeg)
>>1793887I don’t blame you, my dad’s a long-term alcoholic and the drama + denial is absolutely insane. Saved this earlier today because I also wish there was more awareness.
No. 1794017
File: 1701309404155.png (2.06 MB, 1069x1985, Screenshot_20231129-204504_(1)…)
I hate trannies. What women are dating these ugly men in wigs with fat, bloated faces? Like why? I had the displeasure of speaking with a tranny recently and he kept talking about the women he was sleeping with and making me uncomfortable by constantly hitting on me when I was just trying to act basic polite/nice that you would with a stranger. He kept asking me invasive sexual questions and kept diverting the conversation to how horny he was since being on hrt. It ruined my day and honestly just had me disturbed. Is this how they are desperately trying to gain access to women? Of course he had to mention how he never got any as a guy but now "gets some" when he's skinwalking as a "woman".
Of course another ugly tranny pops up on my fyp talking about all the girls he's went on dates with/oversharing in general and how "wlw" he is. It's so gross. What women are actually getting with these ugly retards?
No. 1794058
File: 1701311474801.jpeg (548.51 KB, 828x791, IMG_8705.jpeg)
>>1791833just found out my first boyfriend (now ex, in my second relationship and it is healthy and beautiful) transitioned out completely (he has an online following so it wasnt hard to come across). i wish i could fucking scream and cry because i knew he was sick and he made me feel ashamed and bad for cutting the gentle treatment and getting on his ass. he physically and verbally abused me, constantly touched me when i begged him to stop, and had a PORN ADDICTION. after we broke up i heard he started getting into tranny porn but we used to talk about how gross it was in the past…i never thought he was closeted. i know he just thinks itll put his life on easy mode and i know deep down hes a pedophile too. im so glad i am free but i feel like my psyche is so contaminated because i thought i could help this “suffering” boy and i lost my virgnity to him (luckily he was a virgin too). i just feel some anger toward it all. i learned so much but why did i wait so many months to leave? hell, why did i even ignore the red flags? i think i just hated myself so much.
anyway, amazing to see what has transpired. i never had to do some cancel bullshit or speak up (his fans scared me, i knew he was too popular [despite being underground and popular for something shitty] and i wouldnt be believed anyway) and it all took care of itself! he is a monster and i cant say i hope he gets better. he never wanted to.
No. 1794061
>>1794058an old friend used to call him a “lolcow in his pocket” because hed go in lives drunk and cut himself, whip his penis out in discord calls for music makers while some children were present, let his house become so trashed that maggots accumulated. kept piss bottles i was forced to empty out because he refused (while i was begging.m my mom to pay for a flight home). his mother coddled him too and theyd team up againstme. i felt so fucking crazy! itried to kill myself because i felt trapped. he also kept my kitten from me and i wouldnt be surprised if shes dead now. his mother threatened to hurt me and call the police if i tried to sneak her out. he used to tell me he had desires of killing animals btw. but it was a dahmer phase, his excuse.
i didnt know the half of this shit until the end/after i moved. i just wish i knew who he was before i moved in with him and thought things in my life would look up because i had a “best friend”. i feel so ashamed i fell for it.
No. 1794069
File: 1701311973110.jpg (318.91 KB, 1231x778, gay moids to transbians pipeli…)
>>1794017How can someone have such a disproportionate arm kek? Anyway, I understand your frustration, nonna. I will never understand what a woman could find attractive in such hideous individuals. I'm pretty sure bi/straight women could find regular moids to date/fuck instead, so the ones who actually date trannies must be really mentally ill. But I suspect they're a minority - wasn't this the case, trannies wouldn't be throwing so many tantrums on Reddit about twansphobic "cis" lesbians who won't fuck them. Unfortunately, I also committed the mistake of being polite with a tranny once. He also hit on me, told me he will keep his dick specifically bc he wants to have something to receive sexual pleasure, "educated" me on how he "doesn't use his penis as cis men do" but "as if it were a clit" (sorry if I made you vomit, nonna), and then told me how he wants a cis lesbian to give him sexual pleasure doing anal stuff. Gross. He also only wanted to date "cis" lesbians - not transbians and not bi women bc he "is afraid she'll see him as a man". Goodness, I hate trannies, too. He told me about a "lesbian" he fucked who, later I got to know, is actually a bihet fakeboi - that is, mentally ill, of course. They used to go to lesbian events together, the fucking straight colonizers. But more often than not, when straight trannies brag about going on dates with "lesbians", they're actually talking about another troon, they just won't mention it bc that would mean accepting that no actual lesbian sees them as women. Do you know that psycho troon from Twitter, "Erin", who named himself after a female childhood friend he was obsessed with? So, he used to brag on his Twitter about going on dates with a "lesbian" - turns out the "lesbian" is another transbian (picrel) lol troons are so pathetic.
No. 1794074
I just saw this video come up on my tiktok fyp of a girl showing off her NYC apartment filled to the brim with Aliexpress nonsense. Anime figures, Sanrio neon lights, cheap pink fluffy rugs, mass produced junk. She captioned it with something like “when you get your dream apartment af 22!!!” and the comments were filled with young girls asking how she did it, calling her goals, saying they were jealous of her, etcetc. You can imagine what the comments were like
She made a follow up video saying she had an OF and thanking all of the girls for being supportive. And the same shit in that comment section too. “Yes queen!”, “get your bag did!”, “I want to be you so bad, I don’t know how to market myself”. And it was just so depressing seeing a reminder that her lifestyle is the goal for so many young girls now. Become a sex worker and ruin your life so you can get an overpriced apartment and fill it with pink junk. It kills me, girls used to have aspirations, bigger dreams for themselves, real desires. But we’ve been reduced down to bootleg anime figures in expensive cities, doing porn to be able to afford your next Shein order, be your own girlboss and be empowered, grooming shit for so long. It’s so predatory all of it
No. 1794092
File: 1701312695655.jpeg (43.72 KB, 619x619, IMG_3081.jpeg)
I regret moving to Denver. It’s just a boring, ugly midwestern city that happens to be in Colorado. Yeah I know the nature is the appeal but you have to sit in traffic for hours to get to anything besides a few dry, basic parks.
Hell weed isn’t even special here anymore. This was a huge mistake.
No. 1794101
>>1794069samefag. of course, if they date other male troons, they're not straight at all kek, it's late and I forgot to write that.
>>1794074I used to go to anime and cosplay cons when I was a teen in 2008-2013. That used to be a nice hobby that was good for introverts like me to make friends. Nowadays it seems that every other young woman who's into cosplay and Harajuku/kawaii fashion is an OF "model". That and the troon supporters/pronouns crowd completely ruined cosplay and cons to me. Now it is all about showing off your tits on IG while wearing a Makima wig to buy AOT and Demon Slayer merch and be gifted fetish stuff from followers via an Amazon wishlist. I want to scream.
No. 1794142
>>1794074people who work hard towards concrete things still exist,
nonny. just because we don't see those people posting on social media, doesn't mean they're not out there busting their asses. there are so many women nowadays working extremely hard to be independent but they're not posting on social media because they have better shit going on. just because the ones you see are the OF thots selling a broken dream doesn't mean that's the majority. for every 1 OF thot there's at least 10 young women pushing it towards a goal. I swear internet skews the view of people about life in general. just because you don't see on social media it doesn't mean it's not out there. touch grass.
No. 1794146
File: 1701315001534.jpg (71.05 KB, 500x702, 891-2587741207.jpg)
my assigned stalker is going to start fedposting after this. i want to stop being the victim. i do not consent to being humiliated, made fun of and then gaslighted about it. people must stop giving me half truths and false information. i might have fucked my uncle.
No. 1794161
I’m in college and I’ve had multiple part time jobs, but I can never keep them. I never get fired, just laid off, but I have a feeling its some scheme working against me to get me out of there. I’ll probably be terminated from my job within the next two weeks because I’m not meeting their standards, so I’ve been working extra hard but I’m still not sure. I try to do my best but its never enough for people. I have mild autism (havent told them and I look pretty normie) and they actually rated my customer service/teamwork skills the highest out of everything, but what I’m bad at is just paying attention, I guess. I also get migraines and it fucks shit up and I also have OCD so I get compulsions and shit and I also literally fainted at my last job and got terminated a little bit after. Why the fuck are my genes shit? And I never eat or drink enough because sensory issues make the slightest mistake make me wanna gag. It’s my fault but its not my fault at the same time. But hey, at least I don’t have a permanent hunch in my back from malnutrition, or have gone to a mental hospital, or write pretentious poems about myself and post them online, right guys? Right? I totally don’t follow random strangers on the internet to cope with the fact that I’m too retarded to work in retail. I can’t wait until I graduate and I can just sit at a desk and go to meetings and not have to deal with 500 physical tasks at once. I’d feel much less retarded.
No. 1794181
File: 1701317433214.jpeg (Spoiler Image,177.51 KB, 1143x1161, 2FCD855C-B6FF-4C67-919F-0BF64E…)
Me and this kid in my class are autistic. Earlier this year this kid told me he thought I was cool and that he wanted to be friends with me and asked for my number (I barely knew him at the time and I didn’t really want to hang out with him, but I felt bad so I gave him my number anyways). Turns out his idea of being “friends” with me is relentlessly making jabs at me and my appearance. Now if we were actually close friends I wouldn’t mind but as I said I barely know this guy and he will walk up to me while I’m talking to my friends, and interrupt our conversation to tell me that I look like [insert ugly celebrity] or calling me a skeleton because I’m thin. To be fair I did fuel the fire at first by making up comebacks to his insults, but for the last few weeks I’ve been trying to ignore him in the hopes that he’ll take the hint and back off. He didn’t. He continues doing it. He also makes extremely tone deaf comments to other people I know. Today I saw him across the room and he was standing next to my friend. My friend mouthed something about how weird he is and shook her head. I shook my head back. My friend walked up to me and muttered something about how bad he smells in my ear. The kid walked up to me later and said “hey I noticed you looked at me and shook your head, what was that about.” I responded “I wasn’t shaking my head at you.” He said “sure” and sulked off looking pissed.
No. 1794189
>>1794105This is so true. It's been so normalized that even cosplayers with like 200 followers will create an Amazon wishlist as if expecting strangers to buy you anime merch and Japanese sweets was the most normal thing in the world.
>>1794114>it was filled with so many normalfagsIt's crazy how widespread anime/cosplay has become in this last decade. I suppose the popularity of MHA and DS, and the fact that most rappers seem to wear clothes with anime characters every now and then have something to do with that, but it's just… weird. I used to be treated as a retarded autistic by "Kardashian wannabes" when I was a teen, and now I see female YouTubers who literally have channels only to talk about trying out Kardashian's makeup and outfits all of sudden post "my first anime/cosplay con" videos. It's so bizarre. And if you're not into the popular, cool stuff of the moment (Chainsaw Man, Genshin, JJK, etc), you just don't fit. I mean, it's so obvious how many of these nerdy or whatever normalfags would laugh at my autism if they knew I collect Digimon figures and Yugioh cards lol it's like being a nerd… in a nerdy con kek
>>1794170>It’s more common than you’d think and no, it’s not just an internet thing.Definitely, although I think the internet has contributed to creating this mentality of easy living. I mean, let's be real, these 20-something women selling nudes are literally prostituting themselves - but they call it being a "model". They say they're girlbosses. They have likes, free gifts, fans, etc. Some get to move to nice apartments in Japan. It's all glamour on social media. It's pretty sick how being an "OF model" is promoted to young girls, and the worst is that so many will jump into that as soon as they become legal, expecting to become rich and popular as cosplayers and "models", just to realize years later that most OF creators barely manage to make $100 a month.
No. 1794427
File: 1701321495426.jpg (146.95 KB, 980x551, 4be080a0-be06-11e7-b942-6d23cb…)
i hate my apartment so much
>pic unrelated but is how it feels
>noisy dying fridge next to bed
>cold, humid bathroom next to closet
>constant mold and moth problem there
>creaking door that has to be pushed to open
>separate bathroom and kitchen from room
>can not store anything in the shared rooms
>room is cramped with toiletries and cutleries
>constantly losing shit i need, like spoons, pins
>can overhear flatmates sharting and hacking up
>alcoholic and stalker flatmates want to be friends
>i don't like cooking anymore because of the kitchen
No. 1794896
I'm living with my two brothers and ngl, while I love him, my older brother is basically a parasitic rat man that's in his thirties, has never had a job, and spends most of the day fucking around with videogames.
Just today, he called me a cunt for having the audacity to ask him to clean the dishes he uses since they pile up fast. (He said that he'd only do it when his new earbuds came in)
It kind of bummed me out, so when my younger brother asked why I was sad, I mentioned it offhand. I didn't think he'd care, but he got very angry about it and said he felt like a shitty brother for enabling him by buying him stuff (like the earbuds.) He got really into it, and I couldn't help but start trying to excuse my older brother's actions. I know my younger brother is right, I know that if it keeps going my older brother is just going to end up worse, I don't know what's wrong with me. I guess I just don't want to rock the boat.
My older brother now isn't abusive at all, but when I was small, he did take it out on me, beating me, refusing to consider me a person, throwing out food that I had touched because it was beneath him, and breaking my arm at one point. Maybe a part of me is still effected by that, idk.
No. 1795069
File: 1701344910768.jpg (3.8 MB, 4032x3024, 21548131857984.jpg)
>>1795024Same, anon. I used to be friends with males in the past but now I swear I'll never be friends with a moid again. There's this nerdy guy I was friends with since we were 13/14 (I'm in my mid-20s), he would always have something negative to say about my new haircut, my "manly legs" (bc I dared wear a fucking shorts without shaving), my clothes, my eyebrows, everything. He was into this ex female friend of mine, so I thought at least I didn't have to worry about him hitting on me. He and I were watching an Avengers movie once and he tried to touch my vagina completely out of the blue. And he knows I'm gay and never did anything with a guy tf. When I stopped being friends with him, he told everyone in our friend group that I was a traitor, that I cut people from my life without explanation, etc.
The other friend was a goth guy, who seemed to be sensitive and inoffensive, he was pretty effeminated and liked makeup and shit. He was a lot more stereotypically feminine in his personality than I am even though he's straight, he was even studying to be a fashion designer. And it seems that he always had something mean to say about my appearance, even though I enjoy wearing practical clothes. One day he was particularly mean, mocking my first attempt to make a handmade cosplay. The costume was not even finished, I was just trying it out, and he didn't even offer me advice to better it, just straight up laughed at how "shitty" that was. Once I spent a whole day hanging out in a con with him and his girlfriend (I was not close to her at all, but tried to talk to her to be polite and to signal I was definitely not into her bf). At the end of the con he said goodbye to his gf and it was just the two of us going home together (we lived nearby) and the motherfucker just tried to kiss me and make out with me by force. it was late and there was no one else in the streets. That was fucking disgusting.
There were other situations like these with other male friends. I never told anyone in our friend group about any of that bc I didn't want to start drama or even be seen as an SA
victim. I just stopped talking to them. I'm not a very sensitive person, I like blunt people, but "friends" who only open their mouths to mock your appearance and skills, are never there for you when you need, think your sexual orientation is a joke, and try to touch your vagina or force themselves into you in a dark street are not friends.
Now I no longer have any friends. I'm not friends with moids anymore and my female friends either forgot about their friends when they started dating their nigels or are women I ended up dating and now it's weird to be friends with them. I've been trying to make more female friends but all of my hobbies are now filled with trannies and their handmaidens, and normal women just stopped trying to hang out with people in the fandoms for the same reason I did, so there's no way for me to find them. I hate it here. At least I have my career, my cats, and can enjoy my hobbies alone, but hell I miss having friends. I'll never understand women who say male friendships are deeper or something. In my experience, male friends are not reliable at all. I guess these women just think male friendships in real life are like friendships in shonen anime.
No. 1795176
File: 1701357152015.jpeg (305.6 KB, 960x1072, locks.jpeg)
>>1795164Damn that's rough. Go to the hardware store and get a couple locks you can screw on the inside of the door yourself. Tell the police you have reason to believe he will return and he has a key but he is not welcome in your house, in case your ex breaks down the door it'll be on record somewhere you tried to keep him out on purpose because he returns when you are incapacitated by your health issues.
No. 1795334
File: 1701368838275.jpg (5.64 KB, 225x225, images-_1_.jpg)
any other anons have zero friends which means you never have any plans ever which means you have plenty of time to get work done but you don't get work done, you just sit at home alone doing nothing and feeling sad while also letting work pile up and feeling stressed about that but being unable to do anything about it?
No. 1795339
File: 1701369706540.jpg (110.09 KB, 750x750, 1587074043222.jpg)
>>1795334Yeah, it's easier to get work done than to meet people though
No. 1795341
How long do I have to go on pretending to be a muslim? I can't keep the act up any longer, it's really hurting, eating at me inside. The fact that I have never been genuine with anyone I've ever talked to, and that nobody knows me. That any love I've received is conditional and would be taken if they actually knew me. My own mother would kill me. I'm really close to an heroing. I am so lonely. I've never felt at home, nor have I ever connected to someone. And the drive I had to get out of here is slowly fading, I just want to die.
>>1795334Never read anything more relatable. It doesn't feel like you're alive.
No. 1795434
>>1795381>He'd lose his job, his university spot, his citizenshipGirl what did he do? Even if it was something horrible, you should probably think long and hard before pulling the
trigger on something like this because it could definitely backfire on you.
No. 1795445
File: 1701376607029.jpg (26.85 KB, 524x524, Tumblr_l_3089597652812306.jpg)
landlords just discovered the state of my (admittedly disgusting and atrocious and biohazardous) living quarters and I think I'm going to be evicted now. it was a pleasure shitposting with you ladies, i'm killing myself now
No. 1795446
>>1795434He was
abusive. He drove me absolutely mad. He wasted a year of my life. He doesn't deserve the nice things he has in life.
No. 1795490
>>1795445Or you could just, you know, clean up after yourself?
You really are mentally ill if you're more scared of a schedule of mop and soap than killing yourself jfc.
No. 1795564
File: 1701383335134.png (61.6 KB, 1148x276, Screenshot 2023-11-30 at 4.29.…)
>>1795540Bitch shut the fuck up, you were called racist for shit like this. Don't act like we can't just go back and look at the thread.
No. 1795568
>>1795564????
That's not me, at all. I live in a French area, and it's primarily French and working in Customer Service, I have a hard time speaking spanish or arabic, kek.
You mad salty though
No. 1795569
File: 1701383748364.jpeg (6.11 KB, 259x194, bro.jpeg)
>>1795554samefagging, but pretty much this. I just think it's insane to expect full adequate service when I have to use my phone to google translate. I know a few escape their home country for a better life, but how are you buying a 50k car and not being able to hold a conversation. I just personally think a mandatory language school should be needed.
No. 1795578
File: 1701384496584.png (254.59 KB, 1080x1333, Screenshot_2020-05-29-19-53-43…)
Too abnormal for people to pick up something's wrong with me, but too normal for people to think I'm just faking it. I'm sick of people calling my name, making me do things, expecting something out of me. Please leave me alone, having thoughts alone is so tiring it's better to mute them. I have no credible suffering whatsoever, maybe I'm just born defective. Sometimes I think if I had some credible suffering, people would have understood. If I was a cow it wouldn't even be milky enough and admin would lock the thread calling it shit thread. Whatever now just leave me to rot, I'm hopeless beyond help anyway. Even if I put effort to not snap like a moid every single second, nobody would know or acknowledge it. Nobody would know or acknowledge the effort to put on a normal facade. Maybe I should try hard drugs haha.
No. 1795592
>>1795540Honestly it depends entirely on why they moved there. Not sure why you (
>>1795568 ) have spanish and arabic speaking people moving there, maybe you should look into it, sometimes they don't have time to learn the language. There are a randomly a bunch of Hmong people in Wisconsin because of the Vietnam war, there's a lot of Nepalese and Haitian speaking people in america and it was because of the earthquakes, they didn't want to move. Now nepalese is like the third most spoken language in random cities which is kind of an adjustment but you get used to it. Shit happens.
No. 1795617
File: 1701386899305.jpg (47.56 KB, 735x775, sad smoke cat.jpg)
>tfw I realize the reason why I eat so fast is because the home I grew up in had a bug infestation
I feel so bad for little me.
No. 1795682
>>1795602I work at a dentists' office, tbh if you brush your teeth more than once a week you're better than 75% of (moid) patients. The hygienist will be able to tell that you're taking good care of yourself. Cavities aren't really a huge deal either, and it's more of a genetic lottery than you might think kek. I have good oral hygiene and don't eat much sweets but I've still needed fillings in almost all my molars, and there's people who rarely brush and never get one. A good professional cleaning might help your inflamed gums too. It'll be ok
nonnie, I hope you get a kind dentist ♥
No. 1795717
>>1795710I’m so sorry
nonnie. I can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now. I’m sure you gave her a great life.
No. 1795719
>>1795710You were a good human to her and the center of her world, don't worry
nonny you did a wonderful job.
No. 1795731
File: 1701394765653.jpeg (140.62 KB, 707x1000, D00E482D-CAA9-4F0C-A8C6-4D4BBF…)
>>1795710I’m so sorry for your loss nonna, reading your post made me tear up. She knew you loved her and you’ll meet again someday.
No. 1795788
File: 1701399408374.jpg (104.76 KB, 1024x766, 1000010922.jpg)
>idiot says something in a bad or offensive way
>I take it at face value and react accordingly, usually in a stern but not angry tone
>exchange occurs where I point out the fuckery and idiot slowly realizes how it sounded
>but no accountability or even saying a 'my bad' will be had
>"n-n-no that's not how I meant it actually! I said [insert weasel words and paraphrase that makes original point softened and suddenly agreeable]"
>I get it but that's not what you originally said, so..
>"Anon I don't want to argue and escalate this anymore."
>suddenly idiot is the patron martyr saint and I am just the angry bitch who won't let shit go
This is gaslighting, or maybe crazymaking, right???
No. 1795804
I fucking how men are so reckless when it comes to work. They just assume that as soon as they get kicked out of one, they will get a new one, and most of the time they're right. Having kids? No problem, no one will assume they're gonna be a pain to hire because of that, or imply that he's a bad parent for working. They will even praise him for it. If he's married they're gonna put him on a pedestal, but if you're a married woman who works, they make jokes about you getting divorced because of it. I'm so sick of it.
My coworker was getting an earful today for the second time, because he's been taking hour long "breaks" and derailing the whole operation.the other guys are cheering him up and saying that "he's such a hard worker, anyways".
They put him to train me, and he sucks at this. I fulfill twice his daily work, and you fucking bet I don't get paid proportionally. He fucking yelled at me because I stayed a little late working, and he went all "don't think I'm gonna stay here supervising you". Fuck him.
And I'm also tired of my bf lazing around his job, he complains that he gets tired of it, so he makes an excuse about going to a meeting, and instead goes to a cafe to play videogames for about 20 minutes. He does this multiple times per day. I've been telling him time and time to stop fucking doing that. He's gonna get fired and I will have to sustain both of us, but he keeps insisting that he would just be reprimanded, and the worst part is that I think he's right. He always used to leave hours early at his last job, and they promoted him twice. I don't get if all men suck so badly they have to pick the one that's the least shitty of all them, but what the fuck is going on I also get tired of work, I also need a break. But I don't go and laze for an hour, and it certainly wouldn't end on an earful if I did. I'm constantly scrutinized because I am a woman that works on STEM, and all the moids at my job think I'm stupid, hit on me, or are overall annoying weirdos. I don't get a break, I don't get sympathy, and I constantly have to babysit the men around me. And on top of that, I'm supposed to have a completely balanced life at home. Fuck that, men have it so fucking easy when it comes to work, and then they bitch and moan about how a woman being in the same office as them "ruins it". Fuck this shit
No. 1795812
>>1791864I used to get hate for being skinny Nona, and the first and only advice I will get you is to stop defining the love you give your body out of what stupid moids want. "Your body is closer to what men want" stfu, no one cares, I could not care any less about what men want, whether I am skinny or not, is not because of them, and any pick me bitch that went "oh but men like you better cause you're skinny" better knew what she was getting into, cause I would absolutely drag their asses. Sorry I am not an insecure dumbass that decides to like her body or not in base on what men wants, and doesn't pick on other girls for it. I fucking hated when they told "i wish I also had a disease that doesn't let you gain weight", I would go on and tell them "do you also want to end up in the ER and fainting because you're so underweight your body is failing to sustain itself? Do you also want to have people assume you're anorexic?". I feel for you Nona, but you have to stop listening to those girls, and you have to stop looking at yourself on a basis of "what patriarchy and men like"
No. 1795814
>>1795808It was.
I guess this is the key to not getting dogpiled for vents…leave out all the juicy deets anon could've baited with LOL loser.
No. 1795824
>>1792622>>1792622>>1792622Based Nona saying the truth. I gate how a lot of
femcel spaces end up turning into places where woman can just replicate patriarchal ideas, but act as if that's okay and they're
vAliD for their suffering. The skinny anon is hating on the chubbier girls that bully her, yet she is too stupid to realize they're both being tormented by the patriarchy, and all the other Nona's are going "omg Nona no you're beautiful they're just jealous". What is this? A high school bathroom?
No. 1795838
>>1795833Spoken like a true scrote. Don't infight,
nonny bonny.
No. 1795859
File: 1701402145724.webp (16.86 KB, 250x141, IMG_3133.webp)
Why are we trying to turn lolcow into an assthetic hellhole where have all the bitches gone reeee
No. 1795865
>>1795862you are absolutely right! I did not apply the corrections because
I am not a moderator. I only posted a comment that lead to them applying their corrections almost immediately after, after people had been asking for years to have them updated.
No. 1795882
>>1795879You can read in my original post:
>>1795847>I find it really funny how the banners got changed all because I said that meat-kun was visually assaulting which lead to the conversation about how the banners are not only visually assaulting but just ugly as fuck kek.>which lead to the conversation Please work on your reading comprehension. I never said I was single-handedly responsible for the change. Take a xanax, you sound like you need some rest.
No. 1795907
>>1795896Nonna, all my post said is “I think it’s funny that me claiming that meat-kun is visually assaulting
led to a conversation about how the banners are just as visually assaulting which in turn resulted in the banners being changed”. You can reread it if you’re having this hard of a time understanding. I’ve been using this website for years, I know that the previous banners were just as visually unnecessary and egregious as the statue, and I never once denied that there was a long conversation about the banners being inappropriate way before the whole meat figurine song and dance. I’m just saying that I think it’s funny that the banners weren’t changed until a few days after that occurrence, which is true.
No. 1795924
>>1795921Okay are you done crying now because if the tears aren’t blocking your vision maybe you can reread my original post and see that I never claimed I started the conversation, I said that it
led to the conversation. You’re getting really bent out of shape over the world’s most lukewarm statement ever posted on this site.
No. 1795939
File: 1701404855516.png (101.53 KB, 275x269, 12B53BE6-46C3-40DA-8BE8-DCA5C1…)
I’m so fucking depressed I really need to move out of this city and possibly never come back. I have such a love/hate relationship with my hometown. I love it as it’s my home but I have so many bad memories here and just feel stuck. There’s nothing really keeping me here besides my friends but they’re all moving on with their lives pairing up while I’m completely alone. I’ve been really excited about applying to graduate school in a different country so that I can get the college experience I didn’t really have the first time but I looked at the other student work and now I don’t feel good enough. I’ve been working on my application for months now and I have no motivation to finish because I feel like I’ll just get rejected anyways. I’m such a fucking loser and can’t enjoy anything. It doesn’t matter that my real job is really cool and unique and I have a very unorthodox portfolio I feel like something’s going to happen and they’re just going to tell me to fuck off for no reason. It always happens to me no matter how hard I try I just get rejected in all areas of life and I can’t take it anymore. I feel doomed to be a loser still in her childhood bedroom forever.
No. 1795961
File: 1701406518496.jpg (107.23 KB, 592x845, a5424e40273b2c20ade58bc40bdc5e…)
God I'm having a mental breakdown over my own height. I'm completely average height but I wish I was shorter. I have really bad body dysmorphia. I keep feeling like a fucking beast even though I have a bmi of 16 and want to rip my skeleton to make myself smaller. It just seems like I've fallen into this annoying "frail uwu waif" standard and it's making me go insane.
No. 1795963
>>1795961Look at it from this perspective, if you were shorter you could end up having shorter sons and then your sons will end up posting on 4chan complaining about how theyre incel because theyre short or trooning out.
You being average height is preventing future incels.
Doing Gods work nona!
No. 1796010
>>1796004I mean. I'm a millennial. No way in hell any kid of mine would touch a fucking ipad or phone. I read too many stories about these teachers quitting because kids are now zombies utterly unable to be interested in anything if it's not on a fucking ipad. I would put in them the need to read in them the same way my parents did for me, reading stories all the time.
But yeah, that's hard work and I need to be sure my partner could hold his end of the deal before even starting considering.
No. 1796014
File: 1701413003074.jpeg (642.66 KB, 1125x793, B2A44170-A1ED-453D-A2C8-E9662B…)
My boyfriend controls who I talk to and limits my communication with others. He doesn’t let me talk to men and says men cannot be friends with women. He does not let me wear what I want, he makes me cover up and tells me I have to wear baggy clothing and can’t wear makeup when I’m not with him. He controls where I go and doesn’t let me leave the house at times “for my own safety” and frames all of it as a concern for my own safety and accuses me of wanting to cheat on him if I say no to any of it. I am suffering, I cry every night, I feel so trapped, I feel so scared, he controls all of my finances too and has complete control over my life, I can’t get out, I hate my life, I feel helpless
No. 1796019
>>1796014It's time to carefully plan your exit. If he has access to your bank account its time to open another and if you earn money, re-direct your deposits. Reach out to domestic violence help centers and seek assistance moving out, do not let him be alone with you after he realizes you're leaving. If you cannot physically leave its time to call the cops, you can use your local non-emergency line if you feel too anxious to use the 911 line. Research women's groups in your city that can help you re-orient and escape. Re-establish a connection with anyone he isolated you from that could help you. Post an update someday
nonny we care and wanna bash your future ex-bfs face in
No. 1796024
>>1796017Over a certain age, yes. But there are dumb phones and carefully monitored online time.
I was talking more about parents handing their phones to baby/toddlers to shut them up.
No. 1796027
>>1796014nona, I want to gently suggest reading this book, I've been in an
abusive relationship too and it helped me a lot, I hope it can help others too.
It's called "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft. I have a link to read it for free here, hope it's ok to post. I hope you can be free soon
https://archive.org/details/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/ No. 1796048
>>1796044Slapfights happen in normie circles too, but its more morally grandstanding and seeing who can "gotcha" first with sexisim/racisim/transphobia/ insert anything privilege.
I cant stand the lack of truthful conversations that normies engage in, its kind of like that on this website to an extent but at least people distrust troons here.
Whenever I'm talking to normies its as if we're both having a shallow conversation about topics neither of us truly believe to be true but its against todays zietgeist to say otherwise.
I dont like being untruthful.
It feels like I'm waiting for the punchline of a joke or as if I've walked into a room where people were just talking about me.
That weird bottom of the throat weight.
No. 1796103
File: 1701424950445.jpeg (22.45 KB, 540x372, IMG_4541.jpeg)
>buy jacket for £60
>ask seller when they’ll be sending
>I’m away for two weeks, after that
>find another version of the jacket for cheaper
>can you cancel the sale? Since you haven’t sent it yet
>no
>mfw
What do I do? Shall I just open a dispute even though she hasn’t sent it yet? She’s not actually breaking any rules. I can’t be fucked to wait that long.
No. 1796240
File: 1701436564281.jpg (570.73 KB, 890x1874, room.jpg)
I had an unpleasant discussion with my mom and she was angry that my room "is really messy and even filthy and you don't keep up with keeping it tidy" and then says that I am young and must be energetic and how can I be that negligent. Picrel is the most accurate representation I could find for my messy room and closet, most messy room pics have clothes on the floor and I don't, I usually have them on a chair and it's a few. I both work and do uni and that means I pretty much have no day off and I usually either sleep, doomscroll, do uni work or see my friends (once per month) when I have some hours off after work. And it's only reserved for my room, I keep clean the other places in the house. Also, my room became a storage room when I first left for college, half of my room is filled with clothes and shit that my parents last used 15 years ago and they keep them on the principle of "what if we'll need them in 10 years?", which was the case of 7 - 10 times in total in 3 years.
Unlike my parents, I didn't have any days off from work since this summer - no weekends, no state holidays, no one week leave, no sick leave, nothing, except for 2 days in a row last month where I slept the entire days since I was too exhausted.
Another thing that triggered this conversation is that I hid things I shopped in my closet (boxes and receipts from packages, chips and snacks, bootleg jewelry, one designer perfume, makeup tools etc.) and my mom found them. I have to hide them, if she sees, she will criticize me for hours that I spend money on useless stuff that I don't need (even though it's all bought from my money and it's stuff that I actually use and we're not poor either) and I can't say anything. For her, if I buy stuff that isn't bare minimum, it's useless and throwing money away for nothing.
I somehow understand her, but please, give me a break. She should also have one, no one is gonna inspect my wardrobe of how much dust is on my desk if it's not visible and was wiped a couple of days ago. I also fucking hate the boomer mentality of "you're 20 something nonny, you have no right to be tired".
No. 1796274
File: 1701440474860.jpg (80.31 KB, 1200x630, Close-up-of-Avacado-Rippening-…)
I am legitimately mourning the loss of our avocado tree. Like I literally cried at work (and put the blame on allergies). Maybe I'm just being oversensitive, but I had so many good memories with that tree. It was planted when I was a teenager and I am now 30. It was also so sudden, and I know this is stupid, but I wish I could've said my good byes. Thank you for all of your fruits all over these years. Thank you for bringing a lot of parrots and other birds to our yard. Thank you for being a great scratching pole for our late kitty. Thank you for your great shade during hot days. I loved that tree.
No. 1796300
>>1796140>>1796142>>1796182I mean I guess, but I'm not good at manipulating and he's the type who won't lift a finger and needs to have you grovel every time you need money. I can't help feeling that it's gonna come with strings attached and it is kinda selling my dignity, isn't it? I'm not really strong enough to compartmentalize like this
he burned money when we were growing up instead of saving a single penny for us and he is currently investing in fucking startups, that along with the fact that he has new children leads me to think me getting $ is gonna be less and less likely and that it will dry up anyway
No. 1796425
File: 1701452701667.jpeg (390.2 KB, 750x817, IMG_6615.jpeg)
i am currently curled up into a corner paralyzed with fear that someone is in my house and worst of all i went to check on my door and it is for the first time actually unlocked i know i'm just being paranoid again but i'm so scared it's real this time. it's my biggest fear but i swear i heard a door open but it can't be the front door because i would have heard the chimes there ( that i had specifically put back to ease my paranoia ) and there wasn't any of that noise. i really have to devise a concrete plan of what to do in case it really happens. this is so embarrassing because it's not real but i can't shake it off and if it is real then i was heard talking to myself out loud then pausing in the middle of my sentence to hide which is so suspicious. yes i'm crazy but i wasn't ever diagnosed with schizophrenia i do experience psychosis/had an episode however. i feel so retarded but i'm scared
No. 1796529
>>1796017So sorry for you Nona, but I uninstalled that app, and I ask every work to contact me via email.
It's fucking mental to use that app as a replacement of communication. Either you tell me in person or via email, or nothing. You can always argue "religion" for them to leave you alone
No. 1796555
File: 1701462179846.png (235.95 KB, 612x408, thumb.png)
I ripped off a piece of my nail near my cuticle. Sucks but wasn't worried about it since it's such a tiny piece. Well, yesterday I realized that it's not just that tiny patch that's gone, the nail that's supposed to be under my cuticle area is also gone, I have no idea how I ripped up that fucking much. It's gonna take forever for it to grow back, I'm so mad.
No. 1796606
>>1796582Just pull a covid (of flu) call out on the 24th and tell them you cant come back for a few days.
Enjoy Christmas, and enjoy your family
No. 1796641
>>1796620>>1796606I feel bad for anon because obviously the plans came about last minute but it's really not unreasonable that her PTO was denied, of course it was. Isn't it common sense that PTO for CHRISTMAS of all times needs to be booked early as possible because everyone wants that time off?
If calling in sick is gonna fuck your coworkers over (as in they'll be smashed with tonnes of extra work) I wouldn't do it, it's not fair to them. Dgaf about the boss or company ofc but I don't think it's fair to make other staff suffer because you didn't organize plans early enough. But if you not being there won't affect anyone else then yeah chuck all the sickies you want.
No. 1796644
>>1796635No. No need to be snippy
nonny, it's normal to compare with peers. Jeez, who ate your lunch?
No. 1796714
File: 1701473225643.png (659.33 KB, 850x477, 5vRoGbv.png)
Many times I've been envious of the regular stock photo png lives of old sitcom characters and even infomercial actors. I just want the dated fantasy normie life with normie dreams and normie problems. But I've reached a new low. I clicked on some Family Guy clip recommended to me and I looked a shot of a crowd full of these boring background characters like picrel and wished I could be them. Not just the real world equivalent of a regular 2000s American, but even these 2D Quahog citizens drawn for just one gag. I want to be one of them, I literally want to be the Family Guy. I laughed and crid.
No. 1796815
File: 1701480687089.jpg (60.86 KB, 700x497, 1673823589685813.jpg)
My mom is up in my face all fucking day, she means well and rescued me after a traumatic job loss a few years ago, but damn do I miss alone time.
I hate being stuck living in her microscopic house having nowhere to store my art supplies and books properly, but I'll be fucked if I'm paying 2K+ in rent monthly just to room with some gross craigslist scrotes or some shit. I can't even get out of my own way to find decent employment anyway, my fat cunt boss won't give me more hours and I'm too intimidated and blackpilled on the AI infested online job application process just for some bullshit 15 an hour retail hell.
But at least roommates wouldn't persistently "check in" on me every 2 hours and talk to me while I have fucking headphones on. I have absolutely no fucking privacy and I just feel myself getting older and more of a loser. I'm grateful to her though because she never ever has company over, so at least I'm annoyed by someone who cares about me and not loud, gross strangers. But fuck, I DON'T FUCKING CARE WHAT YOU'RE HAVING FOR LUNCH REEE. Just NEET problems ig.
No. 1796833
File: 1701482000677.jpg (11.27 KB, 261x275, 1691067095568.jpg)
Tell me based nonnies, how am I supposed to not be a schizo when I literally never get what I wanted and I only finally get those things when I no longer want them and even dread to have them? And I'm talking about things I have no influence on. There's many examples in my life but this is the most recent one: I've had a crush on my coworker for almost 2 years, when I found out he's taken I basically stopped talking to him, only doing so when necessary for work, I didn't want to be attracted to a taken dude, and I was just suffering with myself. I finally, finally got over him, I started to see flaws in him, I started telling myself "girl you could do better than that anyway and there's plenty of men in this world", I started talking to him normally like I do with every other person, I wasn't a nervous mess around him etc., but romantically he stopped mattering to me, I stopped thinking about him, I literally stopped being physically attracted to him too. And now suddenly he wants to spend time with me (never happened before) and behaves like he's miserable in his relationship. Wtf. Bro I don't care anymore. In conclusion, manifestation is fucking trash, at least for me, because even if it works, it works much too late when I no longer want what I wanted before
No. 1796845
File: 1701483630708.jpg (35.57 KB, 880x404, EmjscaoU8AUMD7T.jpg)
I miss polyvore and I hate how few got archived on the wayback machine.
No. 1796846
>>1796333I want to believe he is not that influenceable and also his family don't approve violence against women. But I'm gonna be alert
nonny, thank you.
>>1795939Finish it
nonnie, you can make it!
I find relatable your situation because I also live in a town that I kind of like but at the same time hate it because of past trauma and bad experiences, im re doing next year of uni so that means another year of not being able to graduate and have a job that probably would let me pay a rent.
Think about your goal, that probably will boost your motivation, no matter the way look how to move on from your feeling behind feelings. Doesn't need to be another country, maybe another city or state or college, if you can leave from your hometown by your own that means a lot already.
Sorry maybe isn't the best way to say it (im esl) but I believe in you nona you can make it, trust on you.
No. 1796857
>>1796520Me mother was jealous of me and angry that I wasn't living the perfect girl life she wanted but couldn't have and wanted to force on me, but I don't know if she was a classic pick me. In my head pick me is someone who wants to be picked by a male and they're willing to pender to men, lower their standards and shit on other women in order to achieve that, but most pick-mes also want someone impressive, I guess? My mother was
so insecure that literally any male attention was very important to her, even the lowest of men, and she choose a shitty low value scrote for her first husband and then another for my biological father, despite the fact she had much better options to choose from, at least when it comes to economic and social status of potential partners, but she didn't feel good enough for them. I remember when she literally told me that when a guy noticed her romantically/sexually for the first time she felt like it was a god himself looking at her. How pathetic is that? Imagine telling that to your teen daughter because you're salty she's not interested in dating and performing ultra femininity. When my mother was young, she was hit on by lawyers (she was a court reporter), but she was too afraid to go out with them and instead she choose alcoholic bums without any education, no ambition and no plan for their life and in the end her chosen scrotes left her anyway. I always knew I have to be the opposite of her. Anything but that would be too pathetic to live
No. 1796885
>>1796880Dang
nonny we have similar lives. My mom is still alive though (I saved her life during a heart attack) and felt guilty for the relief I felt when she was in the ER and they said there was a 50% chance she wouldn't make it. She is definitely my abuser and I have to be an unfeeling rock to get by, and it's changed my personality permanently.
But sorry that she was so cruel to you
nonny, she wanted to make you feel subhuman because she wanted you to drown in misery when she was too. If she had the ability to lose her pride and set aside her misery I'm sure she'd have departed with the words and praise you deserved.
No. 1796894
>>1796582if your job is that short staffed what are they gonna do lol? i work at a hotel with just the
worst management and my ironclad defense lately is "don't worry… i can go home"
No. 1796937
File: 1701497021991.jpg (494.99 KB, 720x1600, Screenshot_20231201_234622_You…)
I've saw these shorts a couple times but now they're just starting to feel pretentious. Whenever I see them packed it's always this measly ass 3 wrappers. It made me suspicious of the price and sure enough they're expensive as fuck. Seriously 8 fucking wrappers for $67 dollars? And they aren't even that big they're around the size of my hand. And that price was at a discount. They had another set selling for the low low price of $99 on sale, and it looked like had about four packs of the 3 wrapper bundles. I hate these zero waste lifestylers that make this shit wholly unattainable to the common man. I'll just stick to using aluminum foil
No. 1796963
>>1796948Pregnancies do get more risky as you age. I also know my mom had me at 29 and almost died. She also lost several pregnancies. Don't know if I'm made with the same mold.
There are also increased risks of genetic defects with older gametes (female and male). My scrote is the same age. I don't want to end up with a potato baby.
I know I could technically have a baby in my forties, but I'm not sure it's a good thing to do.
No. 1796965
>>1796963>my mom had me at 29 and almost diedLiterally not an argument, there's no risk for 29 year old women just because of their age kek
All women in my close family gave birth to their first child after 30 and everything was ok
No. 1796985
File: 1701501836980.png (201.61 KB, 640x641, scaramouche-by-taking-bath-hot…)
>>1796629They're comfy and soothing and bathtubs are great for clothes/rug/etc cleaning and drying too. It's totally reasonable to be disappointed.
If it's that important, save up and get a collapsible/portable adult sized tub. You can fill it from your shower (depending on the layout I guess). Hope you can get the comfy baths you deserve.
No. 1797024
>>1797007Really, they know some people woke up to their shitty behavior so they are trying hard to flip the script to seem uwu innocent babies.
>but a LOT of women who dress in a highly sexualized manner are the biggest pick mes you'll ever seeI have a theory that those types hate the ones who can be pickmes and not conform to femininity rules. Or just the ones who are gnc and minding their own business, they hate everyone who's not conforming and maybe is treated better.
Don't get me started on TikTok girlies defending Regina George just because she has that preppy Y2K aesthetic and saying that Janice was the real antagonist.
TikTok just gave a platform to mean normies kek.
No. 1797036
>>1796629camille preaker that you?hard agree, showers are violent-feeling, a bath is the opposite experience. people telling you not to be mad are uncultured swine who need to experience a good bath
>>1796985agree with this nona, if you have the space. hope you get a nice bath soon also. how is the new place otherwise? hope it's nice for you
No. 1797038
>>1797036I'm going to take nona's advice and have been looking at portable baths. It's a little pricey for sure but having not to pep talk myself everyday just to get clean alone (not even talking about the luxurious leisure reading I could do in there) is worth the money.
The place is otherwise nice and I'm going to make it comfy.
No. 1797083
I told my (male) best friend that I was going to be moving in with my bf and he hasn’t spoken to me since. Years ago we dated, but he’s had multiple other gfs, including living with one of them, since we broke up. I can’t believe he would be so petty and jealous and I really thought he was a bigger person than that. Yes I know I’m a clown because I trusted that a moid I dated would behave reasonably but what can I say? I really thought he was different. Hilariously he tried to frame it as “I’m just concerned for you anon, what if you become financially dependent on him? You’d hate that” I have my own job, a full time permanent, well paying position….. like what kind of sense does that make. All of his “concerns” just reeked of copium and you know what? I’m done with him. Why is it one rule for him and another for me? How can he call himself my friend then act like I’m incapable of making my own decisions? Also If you’re really that “concerned” you wouldn’t be ignoring me? After saying the shit about the move he then spent the entire evening belittling my interests, friends, and telling me I should aim higher and saying my life sounded “depressing” because I live in a city outside London (where he lives). Well guess what bitch, you’re the one who works 12 hour days to live in a tiny flat, you’re the one aging rapidly because of the stress, you’re the one with no free time or energy to do anything fun. Maybe YOU should aim higher!!!!! You condescending prick!!!!!
No. 1797084
File: 1701514637476.png (1.83 MB, 1080x1399, uwu.png)
>>1797083based of you to realize you're worth more and he's useless and dragging you down. proud of you nona
No. 1797089
File: 1701515376703.jpg (27.32 KB, 400x356, jodi owo.jpg)
>>1797087thank yourself bby you are the one looking after yourself! don't take any guff from any moid swine my sweet nonnington
No. 1797096
I am an unironic NLOG. I genuinely cant stand most women, it just makes me repulsed to be a woman. I feel terrible for this, but i would rather be honest with myself than try to fit in. It annoys me that things will never change, even if i make the effort, because the vast majority of women refuse to change. They will keep buying make up, they will keep shaving, they will keep spending thousands in clothes and expensive cosmetic surgery, they will keep pandering to men that arent worth shit, they will keep making anime where the anime boy throws you into a cage as a form of ''love''. It's so tiring, i wish i was a girly woman or i could meme myself into troonmaxxing(i like my body so i wont). It feels so lonely, i wish i couldnt care either, but it's impossible not to when it affects you irl.
No. 1797117
>>1797106you haven't copped a redtext yet
told a nona not to anhero and got a "vain bitch" ?? farmhands run a tight farmas a 22 year old it'd be weird if you didn't struggle at least a bit with this. especially if you're here, the autist hub.
basically the way I see it is like…they're doing what they're told. hanlons razor, is it malice or is it ignorance? there's a lot of peace in giving people the room to be ignorant and forgive them. if they're spreading bimbofication etc. to the point it's making you feel insecure you have to remember it isn't the women around you participating that want to make you feel that way. they're trying to be as pretty under the same pressure all of us are. and they might not know any better to question it. always look UP when it comes to an issue. like the fact there's so many gay men in fashion and the ~industry~ since before we were born trying to get women to starve and cut their faces and bodies up.
tl;dr sorry for the meandering but I GET why you feel this way. healthy and genuine vent to read, cause same. we're made to feel like we're to compete. it's fucked, and utterly. you should be proud you spotted it at 22. some women just don't and keep playing the game.
No. 1797124
File: 1701517942510.png (71.85 KB, 221x224, fdfdfdf.PNG)
I feel like I'm going crazy nonnas… my partners father is basically an overobsessive boy mom who despises me because I 'came between them'
at the start of November his father did something incredibly horrible to me and I've refused to even speak to/about his dad since, but since christmas is coming around he bought his dad a steam deck. which is fine I don't care but I found out that he cancelled the presents he got for me (around the same price of the steam deck) and spent around $70 on me instead AFTER I bought him something worth 370+.
Am I retarded for feeling upset by this?? his dad was horribly verbal abusive to him until he moved out with me and I just feel like a tool for him prioritising his asshole dad instead of me
No. 1797137
>>1797124he is. dump him.
seriously though, if you're describing his father as a "boymom" it's clear he's going to meddle in your life regardless if you're dating or married
have a controling boymum MIL and it's hellhe's being so inconsiderate to you and kind to his father because you are transient and his father is permanent. think about yourself as you are, about to be jettisoned, and then wonder if your feelings are unreasonable.
they aren't. your bf is choosing his dad.
choose yourself. he can go fuck his dad, kek
No. 1797139
File: 1701519950489.png (85.58 KB, 512x512, kms.png)
I am so sick of other people and their opinions on Media. It feels like nobody understands what a healthy in between is, like there is absolutely no grey area. I'm wondering if there are actually so many retards or if they're just very loud. I hate race swapping and forced political messages just as much as the next guy but I am so sick of the "Woke bad." they just yap endlessly about how every little thing is being shoved down their throat and everything is woke and bad and evil. They want films to be so utterly sanitary,it's infuriating. And if you say "Hey hyper-pc shit is annoying and all but maybe a black person in your movie isn't inherently political" they throw this massive shit fit and scream about how the wokies are worse. I'm afraid that just like what happened with the left, where suddenly everything is trying so extremely hard to pander to them the tide will change and all of a sudden it'll be about pandering to the right. I hate it, why does it have to be this way. I really hope in the future things are made with the pure intent of telling a story and subjects aren't completely avoided for the sake of keeping political groups happy.
No. 1797177
File: 1701525021758.jpg (8.9 KB, 235x294, 8fe081914e300ad2b73e23894f1c7d…)
i have to go to a small function but i don't wanna gooo i want to stay home and not interact with people, it wouldn't be so bad, but a guy i can't stand is going to be there. fuuuuck
No. 1797194
File: 1701527597551.png (1.11 MB, 1193x1048, IMG_6146.png)
>>1797096Befriend a group of normie women and subtly pinkpill them.
worked for me
No. 1797239
>>1796971Yes but I'm still right. No doctor, even a scrote doctor, will tell you your pregnancy might be dangerous for you at 29
just because you're 29
No. 1797244
>>1797239Yup, and I never said that so I guess we're both in agreement… Dunno why you cherry picked that out of my two other very
valid arguments except to have something to argue about honestly.
No. 1797278
File: 1701537835770.jpeg (47.69 KB, 383x401, IMG_3271.jpeg)
Nonnas how the fuck can I be skelly, so skelly I’m the skinniest person in the group by far and so skelly with a gaunt face that makes me often wish I had a cuter round face like the apple head chihuahua girls yet in the photo my face looks like the face of a morbidly obese baby. Like I really hope I look like I do in the mirror and not the photo wtf
No. 1797334
>>1797290She's using you, anon.
Remember that this won't change and it's ok to remain her friend but say no.
No. 1797335
>>1797332stop telling moids anything. if you want to fight with them for fun then you can say something like if browsing lolcow makes you a [
terf/
femcel/stalker/etc, whatever they think] then broswing 4chan makes them a pedophile which is worse.
No. 1797341
>>1797333I'm with you
nonnie, it sucks. AA helped me at first but even if they're sober most still have miserable lives.
No. 1797366
>>1797356She sure is smelling like a pick me.
>look at me scrote, I use boards too.Ugh. No self respecting Nona would willingly lead 4chan scum here, especially an old hag.
No. 1797373
>>1797366It’s a 15 year old TikTok “lain coded” “
femcel”. You can tell they’re here with the “it’s giving” and all their retarded lingo
No. 1797385
File: 1701546450585.jpeg (26.45 KB, 641x680, F9oMaCuaEAAGCOe.jpeg)
60% of men remarry within 2 years after their wife died. Men are 6 times more likely to divorce women with cancer than vice versa. No offense to actively straight women, but what's the point of dating men when you can find countless proofs they're not capable of loving women? Why don't you invest that energy and time into yourself and forming strong bonds with other women?
No. 1797404
File: 1701547954262.png (224.88 KB, 1242x790, 92d348bfeed1b53dd10fe44b06df2a…)
I actually dislike progressives and liberals, as a black woman. Mostly because I think of them as annoying. Whenever someone whines about being white and middle class, I see it as a form of public masturbation. Leave me out of this. I hate being dragged into arguments and discourse taht as nothing to do with me. Who knew wanting better for myself and my people would lead to so much cringe?
No. 1797411
>>1797404I'm Asian and I also find them really obnoxious for the reason that they parade me like a zoo exhibit when it suits them but then ignore me or lump me in with white people when it's inconvenient. If we're struggling with something it gets blasted as "oh no the poor
POC! Support my causes NOW to save them!" but if we do well it's "actually asians are white-adjacent and need to sit down and recognize their privilege" the flip flopping is insane
No. 1797416
File: 1701548711911.jpg (122.63 KB, 480x1200, white culture.jpg)
>>1797411They define success and self-discipline as white exclusive traits which I find to be ironically racist
No. 1797432
>>1797427I looked it up and it's real, it was made by the goddam Smithsonian as an example of how white american culture is
toxic actually.
No. 1797439
>>1796905By "dismantle" I actually meant "prove it wrong"/"drive them into a corner." Questions like:
>What is gender?>How do you know gender exists? >What does X gender feel like? >Are gender and sex the same thing?>When you say you feel nonbinary – what do you mean? You don't feel like a woman, you feel like a person? Are women not people? They are, right? Well what do you mean? Are all questions TRAs squirm over, and answer either with pseudo talk or poetry or silence. Or really cringe "humor" that's just peepee poopoo tier. Even questioning them though is considered harassment, so rarely do I get the chance to do it outside of Twitter.
No. 1797513
>>1797486>>1797502Since people insist on defining it as a term and claiming "gender and sex are different!" I just challenge why gender matters instead of rejecting it as a "real word" or whatever because it never gets anywhere and they'll just think you're too obtuse to understand the idea. Sure, I can see how distinguishing between culturally feminine vs masculine elements can be useful, everyone has some concept of that. But they never fill in the leap in logic where they ascribe gender as being more important than sex, such as someone's "gender identity" being the nebulous key factor for determining which bathroom to use or who people are attracted to.
Even devout troons/genderspecials still understand normal people's definition of a man or a woman even if they pretend it's some hazy idea, they just use the terms amab and afab instead. So I'd ask why someone's gender being "woman" is ostensibly more salient than their sex being "amab" when it comes to determining whether they belong in female-centered or male-centered groups.
No. 1797520
File: 1701557705224.jpg (30.75 KB, 828x763, wallsmash.jpg)
ugh i hate mandatory group projects in uni it's so fucking retarded. i don't know anyone here and i'm asociable and i'm not exaggerating for le epic self deprecation, i know why and i'm not insecure about it. i know i'm a weird autistic freak, it really doesn't bother me. i've got a stupid ass video project coming up in 3 days, which was assigned to us 12 days ago, that i assumed was not obligatory but as it turns out really counts on the final grade over the normal end of semester exam. i just want to do things on my own why the fuck do i need other people stuck to me. it's bad either way because i'll either bring them down or they will. and now i know that if i ask in the whatsapp group i'll only get replies from braindead moids who won't do any work or do a lousy job with my name attached. i mean not that it really matters whether or not it is attached not like it's public information but urgh. i don't work with moids and i haven't not even during my school years i'm not even trying to be le based misandrist i just can't socialize with them and i've never wanted to. just let me be alone. this is the kind of shit i hate the most. there's a mandatory minimum of SIX people too.
No. 1797524
File: 1701557969856.png (40.42 KB, 2000x731, IMG_1476.png)
I swear moids have no idea who is fat or not. I'm BMI 21 but Apple shaped and skinnyfat, so my belly sticks out a little bit and I have chubby arms. Yet multiple men have called me "fat". My ex even told me I'm "morbidly obese" and forced me to go on the scale to see my true weight, then was mad that I was only 122 pounds. "You look flabby and over 200" well fuckass. Do you think only Ariana Grande, Eugenia Cooney, and Bonejangles are healthy and everyone else is "morbidly obese"
No. 1797553
I'm completely unmotivated to do anything that isn't: cooking, cleaning, house chores, doing groceries, taking care of my dog, basic personal hygene, running 20 mins every morning and buying clothes online. I'm grateful I am one of those people who just can't live in complete chaos, but sometimes I wish I was. I've met people who are unable to clean after themselves or structure a weekly cooking routine but who are nevertheless able to enjoy their hobbies and interests deeply. I used to admire messy characters in media with excentric personalities who would live their lives to the fullest, never caring about washing dishes, moping floors or anything like that. I did also use to admire older cousins with maximalist rooms who would come late to sunday family lunches because they had spent all saturday night clubbing or playing videogames with friends. I've always been told I'm like an oldlady, and in a sense I am, but I used to think it was because of my style, my aesthetic preferences. Now I'm starting to think it's because of my personality. I hate that I am either boring as an old person or too intense, too reckless to have fun with. I've isolated myself from others because I just can't connect. Now at 23, after 6 years without friends, I feel like I've wasted a lot of time. And what I really find infuriating is that I've even lost all interest in a lot of hobbies I can perfectly do on my own.
No. 1797568
>>1797564If this makes you feel any better, We (as a global society) are living longer, even those who aren’t
particularly healthy. There’s a really good chance that with reasonable self care, you’re going to get another 55 years out of your mom kek. I really hope you do
nonnie.
No. 1797582
>>1797553I'm a lot like you, where I'll generally choose maintaining my environment and myself over fun stuff and I don't really prioritize hobbies. I prefer being like this though ngl, sometimes I get FOMO because it's not an exciting way to live but every time I do stay out late or slack off it's a huge hassle and sets me back. Like, say I go out clubbing - I waste money, lose sleep, overeat, I'm too tired to go to the gym the next day which will probably make me overeat again because fuck it, I do the bare minimum routine before going to sleep and skip flossing/wearing my retainer, I'll be too tired to prep my lunches or clean the next day, etc etc. It's only worth it on rare occasions. I can't say I want friends because the more I have the more my routine gets interrupted and it gets inconvenient.
At your age you can probably loosen up a bit (and seriously you are 23, barely into adulthood… you have not wasted time) but I'm in my 30s so I need to do this stuff to feel secure that I'm not going to be poor, lazy and unhealthy as I age.
No. 1797601
>>1797582Thanks for replying, anon. It really is a big hassle to get out of track. I wonder if the sense of control is the main factor here, or perhaps the sense of safeness and comfort that comes with being clean in a quiet, organised and familiar enviroment.
> but I'm in my 30s so I need to do this stuff to feel secure that I'm not going to be poor, lazy and unhealthy as I age.You're not much older than me heh but I get what you mean. I'm concerned about stability and health as well. You sound like you have everything under control. I really like interacting with farmers that are a little bit older than me, it helps putting things under perspective.
No. 1797610
while i'm whining about tras, it's funny how they've started to whine about afab but don't care about 'cis woman'. these terms essentially mean the same thing: female, something a troon can never be
>>1797486gender does exist but it's mostly stereotypes. gender is like, girl = pink and boy = blue.
No. 1797704
>>1797520well out of college now but fuck if this wasn't my hugest pet peeve, and it's not even just because the profs are lazy (or care more about their research than teaching) and want fewer projects to grade, it's to set you up for the "working world" where 9 times out of 10 you'll be on a "team" and could easily do the project yourself if you didn't have to waste time in useless meetings with a bunch of normie morons
also the most autistic person always gets saddled with most of the work. the number of times I just said fuck it and redid people's entire work for them because it was so utterly ridden with errors. Like they can't proofread or just won't idk. but I feel you
nonny, deeply
No. 1797876
>>1797864ayrt, that's not stupid, that's a very respectable thing to do, good on you. I'd do the same thing, I love my mom too. so when you said
>If anything happens to my mom though, I'm out, though, kek.i feel that so hard. I would off myself as soon as feasibly possible if it weren't for her. I estimated a year because I'm trying to hold out for her but realistically I know I can't keep going for a whole lot longer
No. 1797888
File: 1701588064240.jpeg (85.12 KB, 500x348, 1700708698949.jpeg)
>>1797838i was thinking until the end of the year, but seeing my family on thanksgiving and thinking of all these people being affected by my death has kinda freaked me out, so guess i'll keep existing just to not traumatize my family like ive been doing for years lol
No. 1797911
File: 1701591086171.jpeg (54.35 KB, 749x765, E363974A-6006-4C4C-ACF7-5680D6…)
>genuinely think about getting back with my ex.
I don’t necessarily miss him but I do miss my apartment and not living with my parents.It was also easy find work and was a cool place to live. I now have to live at home with my parents in my small shithole town with 0 opportunities for work. I ready to fucking snap.
No. 1797922
File: 1701592517218.png (104.64 KB, 275x197, A9947AF2-66EA-43EB-9388-541092…)
I hate this stupid group chat. Every time I think my ex has forgotten about me he or his best friend look at it after months of not opening any messages. Why not just leave? Neither of you talk to anyone in the group anymore? It would be one thing if they never looked at it again but every few months one of them checks it and it sets me back each time.
No. 1798091
File: 1701615330337.jpg (102.77 KB, 828x824, F6p7W-pW8AAgFpl.jpg)
I need connection and community but I'm an insufferable human being that finds other human beings insufferable. Irl friends are sexist or twitter trannies, unironaically no in between. Online friends are trannies or one radfem that turned out to hate me cause I like women and am the ethnicity I am. I don't know how people find chill normal friends. Women in fandoms over 30 seem like a safe bet till they have meltdowns over fictional characters. I wish I had access to normal irl friends but even then they'd probably not like me cause I'm autistic and again insufferable. Even if they didn't mind me they'd never feel like a community when they can spend time with their husbands instead. I will never have a husband. I will never have a deep connection to anyone. I will always secretly wish I never made friends cause they're too much effort for too little return. I will never sleep in someone else's comfort like I imagine every night. I'll forever be a lonely worker that drinks and watches tv by herself at night.
No. 1798176
>>1797888That’s what I’ve been doing too, but it takes so much energy and I feel like a cartoon of a skinny dehydrated man face down in the sand in the desert. I feel so fucking bad for doing this to my family especially my parents, because they’ve been so good to me and their only other child is a fuckup too and will probably off themselves as well some day, but I just don’t have anything left in me. At least I don’t have any friends to be affected so the impact would be fairly small apart from my dozen or so immediate family members. I keep drafting suicide notes and then scrapping them, it needs to be really good and give adequate closure but it’s difficult to figure out how and what to say.
It’s funny you mention thanksgiving— i had sort of the opposite result. I used to always love thanksgiving and was looking forward to it this year, but then when it happened I realized I wasn’t enjoying any of it, couldn’t taste the food and it wasn’t me interacting with my family, it was the robot shell I send out to do my interpersonal duties. It came and went and I felt no happiness, it only exhausted me like everything else does. It made me realize I’m closing in on the end
No. 1798201
File: 1701626064976.jpg (38.02 KB, 750x717, 09661a323464c009.jpg)
I had some homemade garlic confit i added to a sauce. I tasted the sauce, only to realize the garlic confit is fucking old and there's a botulism risk with it. Cooking kills the botulinum toxin, but I tasted the sauce right away so the garlic didn't have time to cook. Now a couple hours later I feel lightheaded, but idk if I'm just being hypochondriac. Idk if I can go to sleep, what if I actually got botulism and I stop breathing and die
No. 1798221
>>1798209Nonny dear yes it does. Garlic + oil is a risky combo because oil creates an anaerobic atmosphere which is ideal for Clostridium botulinum growth.
>>1798214The lethal amount for an average human is 2 nanograms. 4 grams of botulinum toxin could kill everyone on the planet.
>>1798219Yes, also canned food not sterilized properly and vacuum sealed fish have big botulism risk.eck
No. 1798226
The girl I've been trying to get to know better and we are kinda in agreement that we could work romantically and so on, the only downside is that she is so fucking broke. Like why would you, as a broke person then get two cats and every single time I mention any purchase, even food or cooking food, it turns into you talking about how you need to ration your food. It's not even in a manipulative way I think, and even if it was, good luck with that because I would never give anyone money just like that. It's just so mind numbing because she doesn't make the most awful financial decisions but at the same time, not the best? like getting two cats, getting haircuts and dyes, tattoos and not knowing any social fucking cues so now when I mention I got the pants I've been eyeing for 3 months on a black Friday sale, she has to throw crying eye emojis saying how she has 10e in her back account like OK? I'm not made of money either like wtf now I just feel fucking weird.
No. 1798268
>>1798226She's
toxic and you know this. Listen to your brain, not your pussy.
No. 1798359
File: 1701636231546.png (368.86 KB, 1024x576, 17.png)
>>1798091>I'll forever be a lonely worker that drinks and watches tv by herself at night.Wow, I'm in the exact same situation. Yesterday it dawned on me that this is it, every day will be the same for at least another 40 years… When you're a child, being able to watch tv as long as you want sounds like a dream but now it's hell.
I've been crying about not having friends (and of course no partner either) on lc for ages but have I really been trying..? On the one hand I have a natural disadvantage by being a retard who can't get words out when somebody tries to make small talk with me (and being ugly doesn't help either) but on the other hand I also ghost my old friends and am super judgmental towards literally anybody. I'm a total loser who has nothing going for her, yet deep down I feel this strange sense of superiority towards e.g. my coworkers. Like "I wouldn't even wanna be friends with her because she does/likes this or that" and so on. Even the smallest difference between me and somebody else annoys me. And my interests are super childish and niche, so there's hardly anybody out there who would click with me.
I wasn't like this with my childhood friends, we were completely different characters and yet we had a wonderful time together, but sadly they all moved away and on with their lifes, have partners, many other friends… I somewhat keep in touch with 2 old friends but they're both young moms, so I can't relate to them at all anymore.
The thing I hate the most is that seemingly all women in their mid 20s and older solely prioritize their partner, and later worse, their children. Doesn't matter whether irl or online, everything is about muh nigel and we've been trying for a baby.
Supposedly in my country the average age for marriage/first child is well over 30 and supposedly my city is the city with most singles, over one third of the population living alone and yet, I'm solely surrounded by women in long-term relationships.
Another issue of mine is that I don't want older friends. Once you're no longer studying there hardly are any opportunities to join e.g. sports clubs and those that do exist have many middle-aged and often mostly male members. I know that I'm no longer young, I should be able to spend time with people who are no longer exactly my age but I just can't. Women my age are often already moms and with each added year the chances of this being the case rises. So instead I stay alone.
No. 1798483
>>1798472It’s ok
nonnie just put the spoon down and go to bed maybe? I know if you popped an adderall that’ll be hard but maybe just lay down without any food in your room
No. 1798495
File: 1701645723297.jpg (11.68 KB, 229x248, freud.jpg)
Despite modern psychology not using his schizorants for the basics of therapy, I hate how much space the psych studies give to Freud. He was a regular coomer with strange fetishes and was also an addict (cocaine) and I feel like the majority of his "theories" are just his weird fetishes being put down while he was high as a kite and people were trusting him because "what if this guy is so absurd that he's actually right?"
Fuck off Freud, rot in hell with your stupid incest and shit fantasies about toddlers, you disgusting pedophile.
No. 1798501
File: 1701646280741.jpeg (61.69 KB, 945x607, IMG_2926.jpeg)
>>1798495I hate it when his theories check out
No. 1798502
File: 1701646370552.gif (509.73 KB, 480x320, caution.GIF)
>>1798497
Give us a name, Nona. Warn us!
No. 1798560
File: 1701650180203.jpg (90.99 KB, 1777x950, Twin_peaks_laura_palmer.jpg)
I feel physically weak and mentally tired.
No. 1798596
>>1798595which 3ds game are you playing
nonnie?
No. 1798624
File: 1701656303488.jpg (98.34 KB, 564x1223, tired.jpg)
I just keep getting stupider and stupider and I'm not sure why. What changed? Is it because I read less? Does my anxiety play a part in it? In 10 years I feel like I'm literally going to be completely retarded. I've been playing little games that require me to think and I plan to start reading regularly again soon. I don't want to be retarded. I have poor memory retention, so I know I'll probably have dementia or Alzheimer's when I get older.
No. 1798687
File: 1701660877630.jpg (7.67 KB, 225x225, 1000011040.jpg)
Went to go see my fuckbuddy.
No. 1798690
File: 1701660898939.jpeg (183.07 KB, 734x386, IMG_0008.jpeg)
I sweater god I hate that fuckin broccoli cut on zoomers so much goddammit if I don’t get a refund because some lil mushroom-cloud-headed dipshit got my grocery order switched with someone else’s because he’s high from sunup to sundown and has a 6 second attention span I’m going to a-logg HOW DO YOU HAVE A JOB THIS SIMPLE AND STILL FUCK IT UP, FUCK YOU JAYDEN OR AIDEN OR XANDER OR WHATEVER YOUR FUCKIN NAME IS I’M GOING TO VOTE REPUBLICAN NOW JUST FOR THIS
No. 1798698
File: 1701661132710.jpeg (88.88 KB, 671x1024, IMG_1877.jpeg)
>>1798691“Yo fam, I deadass got your order wrong fr fr no cap.”
No. 1798703
I think someone called animal control on the stray cats here and I'm so upset. I miss my favorite one, he's been missing since yesterday and it's fucking me up. I really wanted to adopt him, I was preparing supplies and trying to get things ready. All the cats are missing, even the kittens who are only a few weeks old. There were 8 cats in total. I know it's not good to feed strays and they should be kept indoors, but I live somewhere where indoor cats are really rare and people think you're weird if you buy cat food. All my neighbors feed the strays, so they're more like the neighborhood's outdoor cats than real strays. They come in and out of everyone's houses, have names, and everyone feeds them leftovers. I only fed one, the one I wanted to adopt, and I fed him real cat food even though it's really expensive here. He would come here every day to let me pet him for awhile and eat dinner. I'm heartbroken. I can tell everyone else is really worried too, neighbors keep asking each other if they've seen the cats. I hope no one called and the cats are all just laying low for a few days, but it seems really unlikely. I hope whoever called gets ratted out and ostracized. I'm so worried. If animal control has them, they're probably already dead. Everyone here knows they kill strays. I feel like I'm about to burst into tears over this. I can understand why someone would find the cats a nuisance, but I wish they hadn't done this. I still have videos of the cat I wanted to keep, I keep watching them and tearing up. Everyone knew he was my favorite of the strays. At least I still have my other cat. I'm holding her now and thinking about how glad I am I keep her inside so no one can take her away. I guess that'll teach me to get attached to strays. He was so sweet, he had the roundest face and was orange and white and liked to lay on my lap.
No. 1798707
>>1797934I’ve been thinking the same thing recently. How is it fair that I wave to stay alive despite suffering so much every day just to make the two people who created me, which I did not ask for, happy? It’s nightmarish if you stop to think about it, two people can just conjure you into existence and then force you to suffer for their sake.
But even saying that, unfortunately I still care about them so I feel really horrible considering suicide. I think it will be very painful emotionally for me to follow through only because I care about my parents (mom mostly) and despair about breaking her heart forever. No one really recovers from the death of a child, especially a grown one, especially of suicide, and I cry so hard thinking about what I’m going to do to her. I wish I could become as immune to that sadness as you are. I wish my final moments could be blissful, but as long as I feel this empathy for her it will be the worst pain of my life.
I often fantasize about some sort of natural disaster occurring that kills my family, so that I could be free to die without emotional burden. I even have dreams like that and of course at first it’s so sad to realize you’re alone, but the bliss that follows knowing that I can die on my own terms is so amazing. I know it’s a screwed up frame of mind and might make me sound dangerous, but I’d never do anything to hurt anyone. It’s more like, if a disaster had to happen, the universe made it inevitable, at least that could bring me some peace. But now that I’ve written it out I realize I make no sense.
No. 1798733
File: 1701664726667.gif (439.18 KB, 275x275, AE7F6C71-93CF-486A-BC58-29D817…)
I’m in my late 20’s and I swear it’s like everyone went from being single or paired up and not super serious to beginning to build their lives together. I’m the last of my friends who is single and it kills me. I don’t want to settle with just anyone but I’m so lonely. There’s always some big dealbreaker with most people and I’m so tired. My last ex was everything I wanted and I think he felt the same way but he’s a coward and sabotaged everything instead of working on himself. I think we’re both alone but he won’t come back so I’m just rotting away, single and lonely. I have friends but they’re all so focused on their relationships it’s hard to see them. I don’t have any family near me either.
No. 1798756
>>1798746That's
sus Nona. The disproportionate reaction to your curiosity screams of lying about the call or something else (being worried you're too interested in his phone and yelling to scare you away from it).
I would do a bit of snooping. Any major change in habits without a plausible explication can be cheating.
No. 1798758
>>1798754the number was from a familiar place where his family was from and it's late at night right now so i thought it was weird. i haven't asked about it much i just expressed it was weird and he aggressively brushed it off saying it wasn't a big deal. in a 3 minute timespan it went from no big deal to him getting angry. i didn't even nag or pester he just got angry and i mentioned that it was strange how upset he was getting so he started getting even more angry
>>1798756his phone password is way too hard for me. he's told me it and showed it to me countless times but i just can't remember so there's no way to.
No. 1798767
File: 1701667356997.jpeg (43.08 KB, 720x538, Primates.jpeg)
I got COVID.
No. 1798801
>>1798758Be on the lookout for it.
You could try just playfully grabbing his phone while he's on it doing something that doesn't matter (meaning not a game) and see how he reacts. Is he scrambling to get it back? Does he get nervous, angry?
No. 1798815
>>1798801i might do this. i tried talking about it with him and it went nowhere. i ended up just leaving the house because this feels so out of character. i feel like i won't get a chance to even make up about it.
>>1798787i think this is even less likely than the cheating
No. 1798910
>>1796629lol, even my own psychologist couldn't commiserate with me. He told me some bs about 'people wanting eyebrows when they don't have a face'. I'm lowkey furious and kinda questionning if I should go back.
It's a simple remark I made in passing, it's not like I have thrown a tantrum about it. I have been told I should be less secretive, tell people about my life but when I do, this is what I get? What's the point? I'd rather be silent than get this. I would have settled for a simple 'oh no, that's too bad' for one person…
Looks like you nonnies are my only true friends. Thanks for being there.
No. 1798912
File: 1701683033927.jpg (396.21 KB, 1024x1024, _e4eb1762-e86d-4f77-90a6-4138b…)
>>1798910I'm still mad for you tbh. fuck your psych (you said "he"? first mistake) find a new one if he's shitting on you for something completely understandable. it's just rude of him to make you pay him for his shit opinions.
keep us updated about your bath nona I'm invested and I feel the same. it's different to showering it just is.
did you look into the portable/collapsible ones? hope they aren't pricey and maybe a good alternative for you.
No. 1798936
File: 1701686162862.jpeg (40.08 KB, 600x791, Fmh-NN5WYAU6Nnp.jpeg)
I have a friend who previously talked about how he wasn't really interested in sexual stuff at all and never made any sleazy comments about women (low bar, I know) so I thought he was relatively alright in that department for a moid, he also claimed to be gay. But today I saw that he had a bunch of gross porn on his computer, involving female characters. Couldn't tell for sure but some thumbnails seemed suspiciously like a particularly deviant subject that I would rather not say. I was clearly disgruntled about it and he reacted with surprising defensiveness, exclaiming "omg everyone does it!" which was unexpected because he's usually really laid-back and doesn't take offense to criticism.
I know I'm being stupid by being surprised and actually feeling betrayed but I'm just so mad about how degenerate men are, and it freaks me out that people who I get along with and who are nice are unapologetic coomers and freaks underneath it all. It's not the first time. I feel like I'm genuinely developing mental illness from how stressed and paranoid I'm growing about moid sexuality and I don't know how to cope with feeling vaguely threatened and violated by everyone. Nobody gets it, everyone just calls me a prude, even women act like I'm just being a baby about it. But it's genuinely affecting my quality of life. It's not like these people are just interested in sex, they're treating insane stuff as normal.
My bf is the only guy I know well who's not nonchalant about it, he openly criticizes and insults his friends for exhibiting coomer behavior. But I know he still gets exposed to it because he complains about nsfw posts sneaking into his twitter feed and has been getting frustrated that some of our retarded friends send it to him. Not like we can even find better friends because everyone is pornsick nowadays.
No. 1798940
>>1798936Don't trust moids. They all have the potential to be degenerates. Apparences mean nothing. Charming inoffensive looking moids can be true psychopaths behind closed doors.
You're not paranoid, you're seeing the reality of it. It's normal to feel repelled.
No. 1798963
>>1798916so glad to hear it's free or wtf who is this cranky retard moid who believes what freud says kek. if you ever go back update him on your bath journey and how he let you down. but also don't go back if you can help it, what else is he disregarding? uncouth
hope the new place is nice though nona how are you settling in?
No. 1798970
>>1798961>>1798964Did he criticize something you can't change(like your nose) or something you can change(bodyweight)?
If it's the first one, dump him.
No. 1798976
>>1798964Good on you for going through on dumping him. You shouldn't accept a "joke" like that. Women are constantly scrutinized to look X way /perfectly. To have your boyfriend feed into the idea of changing a part you are
insecure about is damning. He doesn't deserve your goodness. Reminds me of a time my ex randomly started to rate my body like pointing to my nose or ear and giving a score out of 10. What the fuck?
No. 1798978
>>1798961dump him
>>1798972dump him
kidding, tell him off. that's just inconsiderate. make him replace it. No. 1799012
File: 1701692329792.jpg (54.8 KB, 966x720, EwKCfgBUcAETIWl.jpg)
I feel so stupid even thinking about this but I can't help being disappointed that my closest friend didn't really think about me for my birthday. She told me a few weeks back we should totally hang out and seemed excited. Yesterday, on my birthday, she tells me that she went out the night before, is very hungover and on top of that she agreed to take a shift at the time we were supposed to meet. Since she would've been tired after that shift, even though she was free all afternoon, she told me it would be better to meet today. I tried to not be too disappointed, and enjoyed my day at home regardless. No news this morning, I texted her myself and tried calling and still no answer. It's not a big deal but I can't help feeling a bit hurt, as I feel like meeting me is a burden or a third-rate option.
No. 1799081
>>1799012It's my birthday this week too. Wish I could take you out for some drinks, nona.
Your friend is flaky and sucks, you have the right to feel hurt.
No. 1799091
>>1798893Aww,
nonnie, don't waste your tears on her. She sounds psycho and gross. You dodged a bullet.
No. 1799103
>>1799067Thank you for your kind message nona! She ended up apologizing herself, and I told her what I felt so I wasn't keeping grudges. We'll probably see each other at the end of the week, although I'll definetely lower my expectations this time.
>>1799081Early happy birthday to you fellow december nona ! She is flacky and disorganized, but I'm also not perfect and I know we'll talk it out. Relationships are just so hard sometimes..
No. 1799133
File: 1701701579007.jpg (228.31 KB, 1024x1024, wide angle view of Victorian w…)
>>1798442Little drama update: I texted her asking if she'd really come to my city without saying hi and she immediately tried to call me when she hasn't called me in four months. I let it go to voicemail and she texted that she just wanted to chit chat.
This morning, she texted me with medical questions again, asking if I thought her doctor's plan for a suspicious tumor was an ideal medical plan or if she should get a different doctor to do the biopsy but I just left her on read.
The worst part is we have an elaborate group trip that we planned eight months ago coming up so I need to decide how to handle my feelings about being a outer circle back up friend pretty quickly rather than being allowed to brood on my hurt feelings.
No. 1799142
File: 1701701962234.jpeg (40.85 KB, 654x720, 61dee82365dca158d36ee88b_654_7…)
I fucking hate how unmotivated I get during winter times, doesn't even have to be seasonal depression because I feel fine I just can't get around to doing ANYTHING. I want to practice my programming and coming up with small projects but I sat all day in front of my computer today but all I did was fart around on my phone and play with my cat. It's like I stop functioning the moment we go below 0 celsius for few days, I cancel plans with friends, I don't go to the gym, I avoid going to the store if I can… my entire body and mind just kinda go "mmmm nah" whenever I get up in the morning unless I have to go to uni. I'm just kinda just going around in a state of just ~existing~
No. 1799259
File: 1701712297477.jpeg (36.63 KB, 275x220, IMG_7478.jpeg)
>>1799209My heart goes out to all of you nonas. This world seems hopeless, but there is surely some hope! Something beautiful worth living for another day. Can you maybe discuss how you are feeling with anyone in your family? Seeing as you’ve already decided to do the deed, it wouldn’t hurt. I’m sorry you’re feeling so bad.
No. 1799372
File: 1701719574760.jpeg (121.36 KB, 828x971, 1700541612631.jpeg)
my insurance company suddenly stopped covering my prescription with zero warning even though I've been taking it for ages now. now i have to pay $300 out of pocket every month until alternatives are approved where i live which won't be until the spring at least. everything is so expensive nowadays, the last thing i need is an extra bill. fuck this company man
No. 1799393
File: 1701721126848.jpeg (109.22 KB, 1125x1113, IMG_1099.jpeg)
I hate feeling insecure and ugly. I know I’m not but when I look in the mirror all I see are my flaws.
No. 1799466
File: 1701726344827.jpeg (2.6 MB, 2386x2721, CC46FB94-8F43-4578-9BE7-91D3AC…)
>>1799193>>1799194thank you anons, she was one of my only friends. we met in college. I always knew she looked down on me, and I let her belittle me, still don’t hate her though. I love her and wish her the best. she was a good friend sometimes. and now I don’t really know what to do. She called again after I posted that. Says she’s “just checking” on me.
maybe she could “just apologize” instead, but I should let it go No. 1799492
>>1799486your mom act like her own
abusive mother too?
No. 1799531
>>1799515Yup. Taking the steps to stop it. At least my mom isn't like a family friend's mom; poor woman got sent lamented photos of her narc mom every Christmas. I told her she should use them as coasters.
>>1799520Hoping it goes well for you.
No. 1799551
Yesterday my mom was talking with my brother's girlfriend about vocation, my mom is an accountant and my brother's girlfriend is a doctor, and both of them.talked about how they just feel this need to do their jobs.
And I don't feel this way, I don't want to be a teacher, like yeah, I can do my job and whatnot, but it's not what I was born to do, just because I liked to play pretend that I was a teacher as a toddler doesn't mean it's my vocation to be a teacher, like, I used to pretend I was a princess and a divorced woman with a tortured past too, that doesn't mean anything.
I wonder if I even have a passion or something I can actually feel like would make me happy enough to work at.
No. 1799554
File: 1701733636006.jpg (44.71 KB, 712x712, unnamed.jpg)
my bf's cousin FINALLY broke up with his tranny (MTF) "giRLfRiEnD". the tranny stole money from him and basically left him broke (yeah he deserved it tbh). i only met him once because i refused after the first time to ever be in that tranny's presence again (kek'd at the seething jealousy in his eyes when we were introduced tho). this is awesome, but now my bf's aunt has accused my bf of strongarming the family into hating trannies when that literally is not what happened. she's basically implying he is controlling when that's the last word i would use to describe him. i have lived with him for 4 years and i do whatever the fuck i want and he doesn't care. i'm offended this lady thinks he is some kind of controller AND that i must be some handmaiden who doesn't think for herself and is bending to his will when i've never had to do that. i wasn't raised to give a damn about shitty men or what they think. ffs one of the first times we talked we spoke about hating trannies. TRAs need to get a fuckin clue!!!
No. 1799570
File: 1701735125794.jpg (75.3 KB, 1080x1080, b8a52cb37d6264e3d8ab0f5a6eaef1…)
I think this the 2nd or 3rd week in a row that after spending my weekend with my partner and I come back to find that no one of my family washed the dishes.
Can't wait to fucking leave when I get a job and a place for myself.
I'm so tired of always being the one that does the thing they don't finish, forgot or don't care to doing.
No. 1799580
File: 1701736374683.gif (958.1 KB, 480x300, side-eyeing1.gif)
My grandma was a terrible human being, a barely literate village pickme who married for money and status and whose only value was being pretty. I wouldn't blame her for it if she'd been a decent mother at least, but that woman never hugged, kissed or held my mom, beefed with every female in-law we've had, lied through her teeth 24/7, was unbelievably greedy, talked shit about all of her "friends" as soon as they turned their backs and to her peak humor was mocking the appearance of any woman on TV. I had to grow up listening to that since day 1 and it made me so miserable.
Somehow my mother ended up a decent woman with great female friends she's had since they were in diapers. She is also crazy affectionate with me and showers me with love. Tell me then how this bitch can look me in the eye and say a woman is another woman's worst enemy, that women will stab you in the back, when she has almost exclusively female friends and they've all been there for each other through every tragedy and divorce? Explain to me how does my mom adore my grandmother, repeat every word she says and brag that she's never gotten so much as a pat on the back from her, and then continue to do the exact opposite with me?
I know deep down she knows it's fucked up but I just want to know how someone can completely seriously say some unhinged shit and then do the exact opposite as if she never said anything at all.
No. 1799585
>>1799580Your mom just repeats the same stuff your grandmother did/does because that's all your mother learned and because no other role model (your grandfather, or even your mom's uncles or aunts etc.) gave a contradictory point of view for her to form opinions on their own in the years where kids/teenagers form their own personality, nonna.
It's at least a good thing you see through the bullshit and don't prolongate the vicious cycle of
toxic beliefs.
No. 1799587
>>1799580People always love people who give them barely any consideration the most, especially when it comes to parents and children (caring parents usually think the most about their child who causes the most trouble). She probably idolizes your grandmother and parrots her views, even if she knows from the experience that none of it is true, in order to get some affection from her (if she's dead, it's probably some subconscious thing).
Also your grandma may have been terrible but she sounds like she would be a great female villain if she was a character in some book kek, reminds me of Cersei.
No. 1800020
File: 1701778110572.jpg (37.89 KB, 640x629, 626039e5067b2346facf9e9175d6f8…)
You know it's winter when every single public transport smells like body odor and influenza breath multiplied by ten. I want to fucking die
No. 1800084
File: 1701784053287.jpg (88.67 KB, 563x837, e96eecc57b8334c0cbc426e8a00b29…)
if my whole life wasn't fight flight or fawn I'd get SO much done. I'm so fucking annoyed at this autistic adhd actual brain damage. I can pinpoint when it happened and when I went so insane and it was puberty. it's exhausting trying to function when you have so many ideas but all your energy goes to get up, go to work, sleep and eat enough so you can work again.
I don't blame my irish catholic workhorse family for passing me the curse of alcoholism, because I painfully understand now.
and 12 years of trying to out-run grief just made me so, so tired.
there's people who have it worse and I need to remember that and think about them. wallowing feels so selfish when comparatively I have it so easy.
No. 1800113
>>1800084>That picThank you for the new rabbithole
nonnie.
Can you get adderall? I had the same problem and adderall improves things immensely. You'll be borrowing life from the end of your life to use adderall like you'll need it, but if you're not living now, what's the point of not living for longer?
No. 1800205
>>1799877Men only seek custody so they don't have to pay child support.
My bio dad was only responsible for me over weekends and summers when I was a kid and it was absolute hell. He groomed me to never tell or lie about the deplorable conditions at his house and the shit he put me through. I remember feeling so lonely as he'd ignore me when he would take me out to bars or to his girlfriend's equally nasty house to hang out and basically spend time with everyone except me because the weekends were
his time and not truly our time.
As I got older I demanded more out of him for basically being the reason why I did not have friends and never did anything. Imagine being a preteen and not able to watch saturday cartoons, or hanging out with friends, because you'd have to go see your shitty dad who would neglect you while effectively locking you away in a house in the middle of nowhere with no cable, no internet, no working toilet/shower, no kitchen, and the only entertainment being raggy toys from when you were six years old.
Luckily I at least had a gameboy.
Well anyways, by the time I was 13 I already was skipping his visitations since I was done with his bullshit. Once I ran away from a friend's house after he showed up to collect me and wouldn't fuck off.
Ultimately, he abandoned me in the middle of nowhere after a particularly nasty fight. Yep, just kicked me out of his car with my bag like chopped liver. The only reason why he backed off is because my stepdad promised him he wouldn't have to continue child support payments if he adopted me. And there you have it!
No. 1800237
>>1800209The problem is, it's hard to parse out the truth. I'm going to use adderall as a short hand term for all amphetamine and dextroamphetamine medications, though I know there are other versions and combinations.
One, long term studies on chronic adderall use are rare. The generations that have used adderall since teen years are not yet old enough that they are dying of old age yet. Adderall has been used in the general population for decades, but wide spread use like we're seeing now wasn't that common until Millennials. Plus, drug companies don't like to fund long term studies on drugs such as adderall because it's more often bad for business rather than good.
Two, the same pathways that cause the dopamine disorders in individuals with ADHD make them more prone to dementia when compared to the general population. So a study has to show that long term use of adderall causes significant dementia in a group that already has increased dementia. Some of the studies that are available do not control for that. Furthermore, although long term use (usually defined as using for more than two years) seems to increase the risk of dementia, giving people who already have dementia and did not use adderall seems to improve them, which leads to even more questions.
Keeping those in mind, the studies only have implications at the moment, but they all seem to be pointing the same way, that a candle that burn twice as bright burns twice as fast. This is a good start for your research, as it contains several references that you can search more in depth for. (
https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnana.2019.00048/full)
There was one other study I read that I can no longer find, and it was widely criticized at the time, but it showed that the brain tries to maintain homeostasis to such an extent that if you take adderall long term, your brain is no longer able to function normally without it and that when you're not using it, you exhibit stronger cognitive decline when compared to your peers that did not take adderall.
No. 1800253
>>1800237Thanks for the great response!
>One, long term studies on chronic adderall use are rare.That's my biggest worry as someone who is prescribed stimulants, we really don't have a full grasp on the long-term effects yet. Regardless of the outcome, I'm already miserable at the idea of having to live for longer than 60 years. I live in Canada so I'll probably just MAID myself the moment I start showing any signs of cognitive decline, kek
No. 1800257
File: 1701793688164.jpeg (1.02 MB, 1198x1376, LOUISXIV22.jpeg)
mfw my unavoidable dental surgery cost two months' wages and hurts like hell
No. 1800259
File: 1701793762626.jpg (70.7 KB, 1290x860, round cat.jpg)
I lied about failing some job interviews when the truth is I didn't even apply or start searching. I've been jobless for a couple of months now and it's been a blessing.
The truth is I still haven't fully recovered from the atrocious burnouts I experienced and all the shit that happened during my last job.
I've been drawing and it's been healing my soul, I can finally sleep without crippling anxiety about having to work next day. I can easily spend another 4-5 months like this so why won't you guys get off my case? I DON'T want to work atm. People around can get so obsessed with your job status sometimes.
All I wanna do is take long walks, do pilates, sleep 9 hours a day and draw cute anime girls and my husbando and I can finally do all of these , a job can fucking wait a bit more, just let me be happy for once.
No. 1800290
File: 1701794985778.jpg (44.69 KB, 480x480, fbf31d0c6b3a763465cb808dedc3ce…)
>>1793593late reply, but I was in a state a lot like yours. strangely joining a women's self-defense class helped me. I half-lied initially, saying that I was always afraid for most of life after a confrontation with a man when I was younger, that's why I never made friends. But going there helped my confidence, and I even made friends.
No. 1800340
>>1800297I feel your pain, anon. Even when I apply for jobs that are advertised as 32-40 h/week and specify at any point that I’d prefer the 32 hour option, they take that as a reason for hiring someone else who will work 40 hours. It’s a childcare issue for me so it’s not even like I can take the 40 hour job and work down to one day less.
Everyone around me keeps saying that there are tons!!1 of part time jobs out there but I can’t find any that wouldn’t rather hire a teenager for half the salary. All the adult starter positions around here are full time.
No. 1800357
>>1800340Bad apples are spoiling the bunch of working mothers and I am so sorry it's happening to you anon.
By that I mean, I have hired mothers in my company and unfortunately they proceeded to use their children to call out and make excuses to not work. Veritable bullshit lies. One was even responsible for losing an account because all she'd do was sit on her ass at their site and cop attitude.
No. 1800362
>>1800281nah root canal is a walk in the park compared to this bullshit. they had to do some bullshit bone graft thingy because the bone was weakened. and ofc it's a fucking front tooth so i can't spare the expense.
plus i'm supposed to wait MONTHS until i fet a false tooth bc they have to wait for the gradt ti take. except im supposed to avoid using my front teeth during all that time. how fuck do you eat without using your front teeth? fuck me
>>1800302i feel you. this shit is never ever dine. fuck teeth i wish i could just grow new ones like a shark
No. 1800382
>>1800362I'm 10K nona and we literally are having the same problem. Bone above the front tooth that got an abscess that nothing will fix. After multiple root canals, a failed post and core, and a failed bone graft, I had them drill and scrape the whole thing clean, place more cadaver bone, let it heal for a year, and then do another post and core with a cap. I can tell that it still hasn't taken and the abscess continues to expand. The nightmare about this all is for some reason, the abscess can almost never be seen on x-rays, they have to get up in there and the pus to come pouring out before they believe me, but I can tell when it's expanding because the angle of my teeth change as it grows and pushes them out of the way.
I'm looking into trying something else involving a board certified periodontologist, but I've been putting it off for years because I'm looking at another $5000 and I feel like it's just going to fail like all the others.
No. 1800435
File: 1701802050332.gif (143.16 KB, 480x480, 1FF81D4E-6C42-49AC-BE61-7C5FF8…)
Mfw I log breakfast and I have 60 cals for the rest of the day, I should just OMAD breakfast atp
No. 1800667
>>1800340thanks for the empathy nonna, the burnouts and shit treatment made me realize no fucking company is worth my sanity and well being, especially when they pay you shit
>It’s a childcare issue for me I'm afraid to even think of that, it fucking sucks that companies don't accommodate mothers and we're expected to work full time while taking care of the child and family and yourself too
No. 1800730
File: 1701819075571.jpeg (253.38 KB, 497x669, IMG_6967.jpeg)
MFW i am aware that i am self sabotaging but still powerless to do anything to help it which only exacerbates the issue so i just suffer with that awful sick feeling of dread until it blows over ( hopefully ) i am seriously so stressed out right now and it's clown work compared to what others are facing so i feel like a huge retard. i know the answer but it's already too late so guess what i am yet again rolling to the other side so i can continue to ignore my problems even more as they get bigger and bigger. i really miss being medicated it's been years but at least when i feel this braindead i could blame that on them. i'm talking about uni here and i'm a lit/language major so you can imagine how easy that is compared to any other one yet i'm still squirming. i'm going to repeat my year and it's not that big of a deal but i'm totally freaking out i feel so fucking retarded and useless and such a waste of a life. i'm a huge failure of a daughter i really can't do anything. i'm so ashamed of myself. i feel like this is one of the last straws that are about to break the camel's back and being extremely dramatic zeroing in on one single event and blowing it out of proportion. i just want to tap out but it's not even that bad is what's getting me right now i always get worked up over the most retarded things meanwhile i have way more serious issues going on like poverty unpaid bills massive debt sick elderly parents amongst other things. i miss being a teenager and slashing my body whenever i felt this way because it really did relieve me but i can't do that anymore now and it'll probably just make me feel even more pathetic but i really miss the release and i miss having someone to talk to during these times i'm really lonely but if this is all someone gets then i'm sparing them. i feel so sick i just want to puke this out i want to go outside and walk and walk until i can't anymore
No. 1800747
File: 1701820263224.jpg (60.91 KB, 1080x1080, 1693952186960974.jpg)
I'm nervous about meeting my bfs family this week this is my chance to make a good impression none of them know I'm cringe yet this is my chance to sell it
No. 1800802
File: 1701824710381.jpeg (45.66 KB, 500x281, IMG_1576.jpeg)
Falling apart again and extra sad about it because I had a couple week's reprieve from depression for the first time ever and now I'm right back where I was before. Im self medicating with folic acid basically, it's supposed to help with my genetic B12 deficiency, it has been used as an antidepressant. I was doing great on the middle 7.5mg dose for about a week and now I'm all fucked up again. Tired, angry, crying constantly, wanting to hurt and kill myself. I stay in bed because it's the only place I feel safe. I managed to go outside one time when the downslide had already started, now I'm trapped inside again. Anxiety is a prison. I need help, seriously and severely I need many many people to rally together and help me, and I am privileged enough where that's actually possible. If I could only find the right people, my family can afford to pay them to help me. But instead I'm a wreck, I never do any research, I don't reach out, I dont help myself, I'm such an evil disgusting fucking waste of life. I want to cut myself again. I want to die. I went up to 8.5mg of the folic acid and it helped a little bit for maybe one day. Should I keep titrating up the dosage? I can go as high as 12 I think but I'm so scared, what if it doesn't work. I'm not on my period, I have no reason to be in so much pain, but still I am totally debilitated. I need help. I want attention. I cant do anything good, I'm not worthy of anything, I should have died. Someone as useless as me should just die.
No. 1800817
>>1800810I see, so it was only a bit, and not enough to make the depression go away entirely. Im wondering if I should double my dose to 15mg and see what happens. It probably cant hurt. My dumb ass thought I was cured, but I bet I was just having a manic episode. I have a job interview in two weeks and I have to go outside for some appointments soon, and all I can think right now is "no way, no way." All the confidence I had before has been completely stripped away. I feel like I am a fool for believing I could be helped so easily and that my lifetime of suffering could be managed with just a little pill. I swear I'm trying the behavioural stuff too, but it's so hard when I'm stuck in bed with barely enough energy to sit up. If this is all life is, constantly going up and down and up and down, then I dont know how much longer I can handle it.
Sorry I sperged out again. I hope you have a good night. Thank you for listening
No. 1800829
File: 1701827560457.jpg (101.92 KB, 1000x856, smiling-emoji-big-realistic-gr…)
i am suicidally depressed but I can't help myself from acting like an overly cheery and and goofy and loud cartoon character in my daily interactions, it's like a compulsion. it feels so fucking weird to be acting like that when I feel this way inside, like i'm playing a ridiculous character. I can't seem to stop it from happening though, it just comes out of me compulsively. and I don't know why but it unsettles me so much
>>1800827
sorry i deleted and reposted to add picrel, which is what I feel like kek
No. 1800831
>>1800829You're masking your depression. I hope you feel better soon,
nonnie. No worries, I just deleted my reply too.
No. 1800833
>>1800802>I need help, seriously and severely I need many many people to rally together and help me, >If I could only find the right people. But instead I'm a wreck, I never do any research, I don't reach out, I dont help myselfI'm in your same situation. I worked so, so hard to find a therapist in my budget who didn't seem like a nutcase, I was secretly calling dozens of potential therapists during work hours, and when i found one (1) I had to help her navigate technology to get virtual appointments and billing set up which took no joke, weeks, when i was already in crisis, and then when I finally saw her she was horrendous and literally just watched me cry my eyes out about wishing I could die and said nothing. Of course i quit seeing her useless ass, but I can't find the energy to therapist shop again, it takes so much out of me. Like you say, I cannot help myself, I am too despondent and exhausted. Same thing with medications, I've never felt any relief from any of them and now I'm on an SNRI that will give me flu-like withdrawal symptoms for potentially months if I stop, it's just all too much and I can't deal with any of it. How do you help yourself in this state? I can't do it and I feel like my family will think i just don't want to get better or am being difficult on purpose
No. 1801027
>>1800863I don't know if this helps but try not to take this super personal
nonnie, law school is pretty tough and this time of the year most/all Uni's are doing finals and end-semester projects. I know it hurts but maybe just wait it out some more, the months may be passing without them noticing and they could be stressed about needing and wanting to call too but trying to find the time to. They notice you but want to be able to give you them best self which is why its taking awhile- I believe. What will come in time will be whats needed for you.
No. 1801032
File: 1701846471019.jpg (22.66 KB, 320x320, 111947a32a250a83278e3fc2a148fb…)
>>1801027Nona, I seriously appreciate your response. I didn't expect anybody to see, let alone have something helpful to reply with.
No. 1801038
File: 1701848010538.png (1.08 MB, 1239x935, ox42mjhxik821.png)
I have a feeling I will be fired soon. It always comes around the 6 months mark that I just start doing stupid inattentive shit (send email to the wrong recipient, or without attachment, forget important things that I've been told a million times, etc). Also, having ho be at work makes me literally depressed. Idk how people do it, it feels like literal prison, you have to do things you hate, and you're stuck there for most of your day.
My relationship with my mother is also shit. It literally consists of her constantly making me feel like I'm never good enough. If I tell her I went swimming, she tells me I should have been hiking. Most of the time she implies that I've been doing 'nothing' even if if I tell her that I went to a museum, or a concert, or any sort of event. My cousin is the 'golden child', I suppose, it's her whom she compares me since I was a child. She is a manager who lives a lavish lifestyle and travels to exotic places almost every week and my mother really likes that and I guess if I don't travel to Asian countries on a weekly basis, my interests and my activities are not even worth mentioning. Also, I seem to have internalize her critical voice and it interferes with my ability to enjoy any creative endeavors
No. 1801123
File: 1701860124965.png (1.76 MB, 1280x960, GAL_ILLUST_L_TK4_059.png)
Seeing the friend group that mattered most to me forget I exist. Seeing my ex-boyfriend has found a new girlfriend who has integrated into said friend group and is preferred and cherished, now they don't even hang in normal spots when free nor do they use the group chat but there is evidence they have their own spaces now. I feel an anger… not entirely because they must find me uncomfortable or because he has found someone new but because it validates and solidifies this thought I have of myself everytime. I'm not a likeable person, I'm not memorable, I'm replaceable and that I deserve this since I have inflicted pain. This is like an Elliot Rodger tier rant I know but the deep heart stab of abandonment sucks cock. I just have to remember that I have my few friends now, my cats, my little brothers, my mother and grandmother. it's okay. i think.
No. 1801210
File: 1701870504580.jpg (266.08 KB, 658x1032, yuri domybest.jpg)
i want to be friends with this girl i think is really cool in my class so bad but it's hard to get through to her as i'm also shy but in my case it's autism on top of regular shyness so i can't tell what's too much or too little. i've gotten used to just peoplewatching on my own from a distance so i don't know what i'm doing. it's been years since i last had a friend, i haven't felt this way since middle school. i noticed that we share interests drawing as a hobby and BM for the most part but also emo/other types of edgy music and weebshit which i don't see much of if any irl, she's really cool looking too. i feel like such a retarded loser in comparison so i don't want to get my hopes up because but at least she gave me somewhere to contact her in on the internet and we've exchanged some messages which took me forever to do- over a month in fact- and i felt like i was going to throw up from nervousness when i sent the first message haven't managed to build up the courage to talk to her in person– yet. she keeps to herself and barely ever attends, always leaves uni as soon as the first period is over, but i don't want to talk to her during class because i don't want to annoy her so i'm not sure how to go about it or if i'm doing too much and she pities me or something. we've smiled to eachother once though kek
No. 1801260
>>1801252Escaping what!? Are you one of these women who say shit like this as a last resort to justify their cock hungry behavior!? Ther is no escape so that's why women are like a fucking delusions schizophrenics? Or maybe their nature is masochistic and unconditionally loving to men?
It's all so insufferable
No. 1801265
File: 1701874508435.jpg (57.67 KB, 860x478, Angular_cheilitis1.jpg)
I have a small lower jaw, like an actual deformity kek. When I floss, its hard to reach my back teeth without the floss digging into the corner of my mouth. Sometimes I can do weird contortionist stuff with my fingers supporting my cheek/mouth flesh away from the floss while flossing but its really hard and I tend to let the flesh 'slip' by accident. When the corner of my mouth gets pressed on the floss I get these picrel cracks and sores that develop over the next day where my skin was irritated. I have 2 massive really painful cracks in the corner of my mouth right now. I can feel my pulse in it, and its just burning constantly. I sleep on my back but sometimes end up on my side where I drool a little due to my jaw not fitting together right and it makes it so much worse, like a yeast infection or something. Its so hideous and I refrain from flossing til it at least gets a scab on it so the floss doesnt end up right inside the open crack… but I HATE not flossing and sometimes inadvertantly prolong the irritation. I hate this, and hope it doesnt scar making me look like the joker.
No. 1801293
>>1801123my friend group (some i knew for 5+ years) abandoned me earlier this year for the most part, many with no explanation at all. so i just talk to farmers now.
but why are people so shitty?
No. 1801298
>>1801210might not make you glad to read but:
>she gave me somewhere to contact her in on the internet and we've exchanged some messages>she keeps to herself>barely ever attends>always leaves uni as soon as the first period is overthis sounds exactly like me. it doesn't mean she dislikes you or anything she may just not be in the mood to make friends or is bad at keeping them. i could be projecting but i've been on the other end of this situation countless times
No. 1801302
>>1801298aw yeah i think i'll just back off then. a similar thing happened to me last year only we had no common interests
other than well me being asian and the girl being a huge koreaboo so i was her next best thing and i felt suffocated even though i didn't
really dislike her or anything and she was nice to me, i just preferred being alone to her company (or anyone's that year, i just wanted to be done with the day and go back home as soon as possible) so maybe i shouldn't have complained kek. oh well, i get it. it was good to know someone shared interests with me though
No. 1801307
File: 1701877937016.jpeg (381.53 KB, 852x638, IMG_6049.jpeg)
>>1800833Im so sorry anon, an experience like yours takes so much energy out of you that you didn't even have in the first place. No wonder youre exhausted. I also quit therapy recently because it just wasn't helping, in 9 months I didn't make any progress at all. I hate that there is something so wrong with me that nothing helps. I was so excited to finally be healthy, but I'm as sick as ever… All we can do is stay alive, wait and hope. Im too tired to do anything else.
>>1800872I've been taking vitamin D along with other necessary vitamins and it hasn't made a difference. Good suggestion though, thank you.
>>1800819That would be the smart thing to do, but IDK I'm just scared. I dont like meds in general and I worry a shrink would try to put me on something evil and expensive. Im falling apart so fast I feel like I dont have time to wait. Im just gonna take the 15mg rn starting from today and see what happens. If it fails, it fails, and I just have to try something else.
Anyone who feels so inclined, please pray for me. I need a job so bad and I think I can be hired at the one I'm interviewing for, but if I can't get out of bed, obviously I won't be able to do it. Im so sorry, to God and everyone.
No. 1801309
File: 1701878177601.jpeg (115.35 KB, 736x728, IMG_9006.jpeg)
I need to stop seething.
No. 1801316
File: 1701878437802.png (61.38 KB, 438x438, 1000011087.png)
I don't know what it's gonna take to get my shit together but I am so mad that I don't attract the men who I want nor the admiration I desire all because I lack the physical discipline to work on having an attractive, fit body.
It's stupid because I have been disciplined in other areas of my life like my education, hygiene, career, domestic responsibilities, among other things.
Even my eating habits aren't bad.
But consistent exercise? Forget about it. I don't know why, either. There is no one explanation that makes sense or encapsulates the issue. Traumas? Having parents that never cared about exercise? Depression abd resignation to the fact that I can't change? Being a midget? Idk.
There has only ever been one time in my life that I have ever been in shape and that is when I was in grad school which is now a solid decade behind me. I hated myself. I took exercise electives so I'd be forced to work out, joined a contact sport, utilized the state of the art gym at my campus, and had one of picrel with water as my sole meal for the day. I remember rubbing my hands together and watching the scale plummet weekly. Cheered myself on while I started to be able to wear japanese burando. Yet men still negged me for my weight even at my lowest, who knows if they did it solely because my low self-esteem was just that obvious.
I don't want to go back to hating myself but I have no idea what to do. I'm just so sick of being accosted by neckbeards, uggos and losers. If the genders were reversed, I'd have my pick of attractive, successful women while society praised me for "dadbod," but because I'm female, the form tarnishes my opportunities and connections. It's frustrating how much harder women have to work for shit while being gaslighted that we have life on easymode. BULLSHIT.
No. 1801384
File: 1701883602069.gif (7.98 MB, 498x319, E1E70AE9-A935-4A41-B1AD-47D66D…)
I hate my brain that makes me feel rejected and left out when I simply can’t contribute, it’s really not that big a deal why am I so sensitive. Time to withdraw so I don’t spiral yay.
No. 1801426
File: 1701885523586.png (381.57 KB, 1080x930, Screenshot_20231206-125924.png)
>>1801265There's something inherently wrong with the skin there if it's cracking and bleeding that easily, have you seen a dermatologist? As a preventative method, you should apply petroleum jelly to the corners before you floss, that way the floss strips the jelly first and your skin takes less damage. You could also get those flossers on a stick that dentists use. You might also be allergic to your toothpaste.
No. 1801504
File: 1701889341595.gif (482.47 KB, 500x294, 1000011090.gif)
Omg why can't I just stop being nice to this man? I'm not interested, ughhhhh.
>catfished me with photos from several years ago when he still had all his hair and wasn't scrawny
>gave him a chance anyway
>sex was alright
>high paying job
>still couldn't get past his looks
>stingy with things except for his own hobbies, turnoff
>dorky in an aloof way not an endearing nerd way
>jumped the shark by saying we were in a relationship before I agreed
>soft rejected him
>keeps trying to kiss me whenever we go out or hang out
>"Where's my hug?"
>paper skin and glass bones, cancels date because he pulled his neck while sleeping
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN HIM ANYWAY. DUMB BITCH GET SOME SELF ESTEEM
No. 1801509
>>1801488Your bro doesn't have any boundaries and is letting a relationship get between him and his "pro-athlete" goals because HE doesn't care about it as much as you guys thought.
What's he getting out of it if everything to do with her is miserable? Sex? Well, that's on him. Let him take some big boy accountability and learn a few lessons.
No. 1801517
>>1801293I don't know nonna. I don't know
I'm really sorry to hear that happened to you though, I feel without explanation is much worse than in my case. Glad you have other nonnies to interact with..been considering doing the same too tbh
No. 1801530
>>1801509>What's he getting out of it if everything to do with her is miserable? Sex? Idk nor care about his sex life but he liked her from the start because she's pretty and outgoing. Honestly you're right he probably doesn't care that much about his future career as we thought, but it makes me sad because he really has potential and I don't think it's worth to throw everything away for a retarded relationship that's not gonna work out anyway. That's not even his first
toxic relationship lol but it seems like last time he had more boundaries. At the end of the day I acknowledge it's his decision and we can't do much about it
No. 1801541
There's a pool taxi service base at the entrance of my neighborhood that I use everyday.
Is probably the worse taxi service I've ever used. I don't even know why I still use it. I started using cause I thought I would prefer to go to work on a taxi than on bus, but man it fucking sucks.
They're always having car crashes, they cars they use are shitty, they put so much people on the same car it looks like a clown car and get stopped by transit cops all the time, they spend most of the times bickering with each other, and they get rude as fuck if you don't have the exact change at the time of paying. They're all men, so it doesn't surprise me that their entire ego is comprised into a shitty ass car, but why do I have to stand for it?
Today I was running late, because the guy said he wanted to "stay the required time on the base" before leaving. At the time of leaving, he looks at rudely and tells that I need to pay in exact change. He spent ALL THIS TIME flirting with a girl that looked way younger than him at the base, instead of telling me beforehand. So I had to leave in a run to buy something at the 7-11 across the street to get change, and I "slammed the door". I didn't even slammed it, and if I did it wasn't intentional, I was in a fucking hurry. So the guy starts yelling at me, while I run to get change.
I come back, and the guy tells me all proudly that he "can't drive me" because I "slammed the door", and proceeds to keep talking to the girl.
I didn't even say anything back, I was in a fucking hurry and I just left. I'm still pissed cause I wish I would have at least showed him the finger or something. I hate these fucking manlets. I've seen men treat them awfully, and you bet they never talk back. But since I am a small framed woman, they feel all big. Bunch of stupid idiots.
I fucking hate men, I fucking hate how they end up ruining everything because their egos are as small as their dicks, and I fucking hate how the whole car industry revolves around them and their stupid sexists fantasies.
What's worse, is that they're gonna cry to each other and they can decide not to drive me anymore. Which fine, I don't fucking care. Doesn't mean it's not a shitty pissbaby tactic mean to make themselves feel better about themselves and the fact the only aspect in their lives they can feel important is by driving people around.
Fuck this
No. 1801542
File: 1701891207987.jpg (103.1 KB, 1280x720, 1695424775195.jpg)
If I could change one thing about my life, I would go back in time and stop my younger self from ever watching or learning about anime, or at the very least tell my father to keep a tighter and more vigilant watch on the anime I watched because it is probably the direct cause of me becoming a cringe hypersexual middle-schooler to high-schooler who interacted with adult communities way out of her age range, continued to consume increasingly extreme, violent, and fetishitic pornographic content, developed a porn addiction and and has irrevocably ruined any form or chance of sexual normalcy in her adulthood or a chance at a normal sexual relationship with another woman. I hate and feel visceral disgust at myself so much that it actually makes me suicidal at times. I want to get therapy for this. Would it be wrong to get therapy for this?
No. 1801606
>>1801542i used to be into degenerate shit too and even ruined my chances at having a regular sex life when i started having sex b/c i traumatized myself. if you really want to change you have to try to stop entertaining these thoughts and stop looking at material for the dopamine fix. i avoid de/g/enerate threads (of course it was fun and sometimes i miss it) but still some kink-type material i like is posted in unrelated threads and it's easy for me to just be honest with myself and say "i still like (x material) but there's no point in thinking about it" and focus on something more productive. it used to be bad how much time i'd sit there thinking up scenarios, i never even watched porn but wasted SO MUCH TIME i will never get back.
you can still find someone, believe me, i did somehow. in my experience it is worth it to share your life with someone, getting off is ephemeral and honestly, pointless compared to sharing a special bond with another person.
No. 1801625
>>1801606I actually have plans to now, not just for this but for other things too. I feel getting a professional outlook on this will be important.
>howtostopbeingacuckoldonline.comI was actually surprised to see that the blog-posts were surprisingly helpful in getting a start on how to tackle this. I just want to be normal but I'm afraid that 10+ years of damage might be impossible. I quit cold turkey but when I try to use normal more "healthy" content I feel nothing. I want to be intimate with myself in a healthy way that doesn't involve inherently damaging and vile things.
>>1801606>you can still find someone, believe me, i did somehow. in my experience it is worth it to share your life with someone, getting off is ephemeral and honestly, pointless compared to sharing a special bond with another person.If I may ask, are you still able to be intimate with that person despite the damage done? That's one of the bigger things I worry about. I want to be intimate with another woman in a healthy way. That's primarily why I want to fix myself for the better. I want to have a girlfriend, I want to be able to be intimate with her. I know having a special bond is important, but I don't want just a bond I want to experience the full spectrum of a relationship with someone. Plus, I don't think it would be fair to this hypothetical someone either to say "Sorry, I won't ever be able to be intimate with you because of my own retardation, let's just keep it a special bond." if that makes sense.
No. 1801640
>>1801625AYRT, honestly not really. we never figured it out, but we've discussed it ad nauseum and FWIW his ex regularly pressured him into doing sexual acts that made him extremely uncomfortable so we have just never been a very "sexually-charged" couple.
i don't have an answer for that unfortunately. i hope you do get the kind of relationship you want. it was very hard for me to accept that the sexual lifestyle/relationship i imagined at 18 was never going to happen but once i broke through that i felt much happier and more "myself" getting over my fetishes.
maybe take a break from anything sexual for a period of time. it's really hard at first then gets easier. you can try to start with a "cleaner slate" at some point after some self reflection.
No. 1801651
File: 1701897248559.png (147.72 KB, 540x421, IMG_4234.png)
aaaaah one more day one more day I got time I just need to actually do the thing ahahah I have all night
No. 1801655
File: 1701897444895.jpg (185.55 KB, 960x540, we're like romeo and juliet rn…)
I've always cut my nails as short as I possibly can, but recently it's getting to the point that I can't use them for anything even days later and it also has been starting to hurt, so now I leave them like half a millimeter longer, but that feels so disgusting and dirty, and some nails that I suppose I accidentally cut shorter out of habit hurt, still, so I'm thinking of just saying fuck it and bearing with the pain.
No. 1801666
File: 1701897987628.jpeg (137.25 KB, 2000x2000, IMG_4235.jpeg)
>>1801265My mouth is also kinda fucked like that and I would put a cream around my mouth after showering, something like this doesn’t really cause breakouts. I also have very dry lips from dehydration and picking.
No. 1801677
>>1801662>I will have to see what happens and hope for the best, and if the best doesn't occur I'll make peace with what I can.i think this is a good attitude to have. nobody is perfect but don't take shit or have low standards. for me, i chose my loving autistic relationship over going back into the sea of broke uninteresting perverts.
>I'm just angry and disappointed in myself, like I could've been normal.>It feels like I will always have this lurking in the corner of my life.i feel the same way. i feel damaged and unable to figure out sex. my first sexual experiences were basically letting a moid assault me. i had fantasized about it for years. i didn't realize how horrible that was to do until the damage was done. memories of things that happened randomly pop into my mind and i can't help but ruminate how i got to that point. how do normal people have normal sex at normal intervals? i'm not sure. i just tend to laugh at myself for being different and try to not worry about it.
No. 1801692
File: 1701899752507.jpg (74.09 KB, 1179x823, F2j9Bh_a8AAchKQ.jpg)
diagnoses and all that stuff aside, i feel like my personality and overall the type of person i am is just unfit for this world. my life situation improved a lot on the start of 2023 and i thought i'd be able to get my life on track but then my mental health just started spiraling down again. got a new medication that isn't really doing anything, i feel like im getting so hopeless. i really don't have any will to live and all the dreams and aspirations seem meaningless in comparison to the tiredness and mental pain. ect is next for me… i was scared of it at first but it's been so bad lately, so why not? im just trying to survive december, my moms birthday is near and she loves christmas. i really want to try to make those happy for her at least.
No. 1801698
>>1801687you aren't alone, just hit rock bottom again with my skin picking
I'm so tired of the cycle of pick > hide and heal > pick more > hide etc
No. 1801889
File: 1701908240081.gif (59.83 KB, 220x149, ugh-dana.gif)
My friend has a dance group that I like to watch when she posts online. She just let a man join the group and now it looks so weird. I dont know why women dont gatekeep more and let fags ruin shit by joining.
No. 1801990
File: 1701913167812.gif (767.96 KB, 500x275, cb29eea04fd9f1608526791882b4b1…)
fucking goddamned floorers taking MONTHS. i am a neat freak living in chaos for months now and i just want to clean my entire house top to bottom but no i can't do shit beyond the bare minimum because of how installing a floor works. it looks so trashy in here right now. on top of that i have more stuff i want to do like repainting, installing new light fixtures, new curtains and curtain rods…
i am ripping out more of the trim tomorrow so this whole project can move faster. picrel is gonna be me as soon as the floor and trim are replaced, i can hardly wait.
No. 1802021
>>1802002i don't think you understand the flooring process. its the entire floor not just one room. your shit is moved everywhere because the floor gets ripped up and the new one has to be put in a certain way. my oven and dishwasher are in the garage. furniture is moved around. why would i pay even a penny for a carpet to be cut to size, move everything back, just for the floorers to come back and have to roll the carpet up and move my shit back around. it's about 1/4 done anyway. they just show up when they feel like it every other weekend. this happened because the contractor had a stroke a while back which put a wrench in their plans.
im sorry but this was a weird suggestion im assuming you just didnt know what i meant by getting an entire floor redone.
No. 1802038
>>1802021I just kind of assumed you had no floorboards and wanted to put your feet on something or stare at something thats not the floor/concrete. Like a cheap carpet you can roll down for when they are not there and roll back up for peace of mind and to stare at not construction? I literally do not know you or your flooring situation so I just kind of imagine a room with no floorboards and you icking at touching the concrete and then maybe having like a cheap carpet to roll down for your feet to feel better. I assume as of right now you probably have slippers so thats probably better than a carpet anyways. Joke is cheap carpet. I guess they are not. Sorry
nonnie. Hope it gets done soon.
No. 1802099
Nonas I feel so empty. I try to keep my head above the water, but it's getting harder and harder. I have no friends in real life, haven't had any in years. Online, all I have are two moids who barely ever respond. One only messages me when he wants me to be his personal therapist, otherwise he only responds "lol" or "lmao" or some emoji maybe once a day. I've slowly stopped messaging him, he keeps bragging about how many friends he has too. The other I can't really have a proper conversation with, we message maybe once per week if that. Every time I try to join a new group online (whether instagram, reddit, or mostly discord now) it's painfully obvious I lack social skills, and I eventually either get "let down softly" (msged by mod bot that I'm a social failure and getting a warning despite not breaking any actual rules) or people just never respond to me. I've tried all of those retarded "how to socialise" "how to make friends" guides- it isn't like they actually work. I haven't had a female friend since my age was in single digits. I feel like I spent too much of my formative years on 4chan/reddit/instagram and now have women complain they thought I was a guy because of how I text or something. Sometimes I wish I was straight or bisexual so I could date men instead, but obviously that has its own problems too. I'm just sad nonas, sorry to blog so much, I just don't have anyone to tell. Every time something happens, good or bad, I open my phone only to realise I have no one to tell. Everything is so empty.
No. 1802118
>>1802111I understand what you mean nona, no offense taken. I don't think I'm very picky, but to be honest I have never been in a position where I could even begin a romantic relationship anyway. Being a lesbian and disliking children, I never would have been part of the gene pool anyway, so to take something too seriously: I wish nature would make an exception, and at least let me have a close relationship with another woman. Hell, at this point, I wouldn't mind a tolerable moid that wouldn't eventually want to get in my pants. I'm sorry to hear your internet friend stopped talking to you altogether, I feel like I'll be at that same point before the upcoming new year as well. It hurts a lot.
There's such a deep, unshakeable yearning to have a person in my life that I could do everything with. In my school days I always ate alone, or when people sat with me it was to harass me in some form or another. Every time I see people having friends, going out, hanging out, just doing Normal Human Being things, it makes me so incredibly sad. I find it hard to even doomscroll reels or twitter now because I get so sad seeing people be normal, to have any kind of relationship with other human beings.
I hope someday we can find people that understand and are willing to be close, but I fear that hope is in vain. Some people are simply left to be alone, I suppose. It isn't in the cards.
No. 1802119
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apparently my cousin identifies as a pansexual femboy now. jfc she is a 10 year old girl. please dont give unrestricted internet access to your kids
No. 1802126
>>1802118>Every time I see people having friends, going out, hanging out, just doing Normal Human Being things, it makes me so incredibly sad.I understand that feeling. I'm jealous of them, but at the same time I know I wouldn't even make a good friend with the way that i am. It's like, I'm depressed because I have no connection to other people (amidst other things), but to form a strong connection to people you have to be mentally stable enough to do normal people things like go out and… respond to texts. I can't even do that a lot of the time, so i lose acquaintances.
>when people sat with me it was to harass me in some form or another.This happened to me a lot to. I brought it on myself though, I acted weird on purpose for reasons I still don't understand, and I am ugly. Now I guess I've done a 180 and act so fakely normal that I can't connect with anyone since the real me does not come out. What do you think it is about you that made people harass you?
>Some people are simply left to be alone, I suppose. It isn't in the cards.The older I get, the more I realize that this must just be the case. I wasn't designed to have friends or a lover, I am incapable of either.
No. 1802218
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I’m mentally stuck as a teenager. I can’t afford to move out on my own. I have regular thoughts of suicide. I have less life experience than a 19 year old despite being 26. I flunked out of school and can’t get a damn job anywhere. I can’t afford to go back without paying thousands of dollars back. My family thinks I’m a soft spoken retard. I feel like I’m stuck and there’s nothing for me. They refuse to consider any job that isn’t some medical assistant for me. Should I just take a nap on the interstate?
No. 1802229
>>1802218You should take solace in the fact that your parents aren't evil enough to kick you out, at least not yet. To be completely honest, you really can't get a good job at all without at least having some minor higher education. You don't need to get a full degree, but finding seeing what jobs you can get with just a certificate or diploma of some kind and then making steps to getting them might be a start. I have flunked out of university TWICE and right now community college is the only thing working out for me personally. As for the life experience thing, i personally did not have a teenage era or even a young adult era since i was
and still a shut in. There's nothing you can do to remedy that, you kind of need to seethe and cope about it. But you should at least go out to fun places alone so you can have fun memories and take your mind off your situation. At least when you finally get a job you can be somewhat free.
No. 1802231
>>1802227Please don’t. It sucks being out of loop and having to explain your situation during interviews. Flunking out is the most embarrassing thing I’ve done. Try to withdraw or take a break instead.
I hate the idea of working in a hospital but something is something no?
No. 1802235
>>1802229I wish she fucking killed me instead. Death is better than being a loser burden. I used to be able to have a small part time job but I couldn’t even find that during the holidays.
I was a good child who never disobeyed their parents so I never did anything rebellious. No boyfriend, small and distant friend group. I majorly fucked up as an adult. Super religious family I live with because I can’t afford to leave so I’m judged for even the smallest things and I cope with distracting myself because I hate my current reality. Can’t even scream into a pillow without being yelled at. Shit weather is making me suicidal.
>>1802230Sadly I don’t qualify for anything. I even had the phone interview and everything.
No. 1802243
>>1802231hopefully i'll only be put onto probation but it's out of my hands at this point.
i really sympathize with you
nonnie. i have friends who either dropped out or never went to college, i'd recommend the following jobs if you don't want to go to a cc
>salescommission based job on top of a salary
>it supportstuff like setting up printers or fixing desktop issues, a lot of times doesnt require a degree, either in an office or elementary school
as for the radiology tech job, i have a friend who does it and it's not too bad or stressful according to her.
wishing you the best! we have a similar upbringing and i know how crippling it can be.
No. 1802366
>>1802099I'm in a similar boat. Absolutely no friends, I have a boyfriend but the lack of friends is getting to me. There are things I cannot discuss with him, and I haven't had a female friend (or any friend whatsoever) since I was about 11. I've tried cc's friend finder thread and I did talk to some nonas but I'm such a socially inept retard I didn't manage to make any friends… it's like I repel people.
>Every time something happens, good or bad, I open my phone only to realise I have no one to tell. Everything is so empty.I really relate to this. I come here and shitpost and it fills the want of wanting to share things with people but it's just not the same. I wish I had a friend so we could share things about each other's day and support each other, but I feel like at this point I just have to get used to being alone.
No. 1802394
My clown ass curating and buying xmas gifts for the guy who thought it was appropriate to tell me over the phone that I wasn't invited to his friend's holiday party because "they're overprotective and have trust issues." Yes, I've hung out with them and I was not a problem before. He's alluding to me rejecting him after he tried to make a public announcement that we were in a relationship together when I wasn't sure, and him crying to his friends about it. Yeah I let him down gently but that didn't matter.
Of course his friends hate me now–not that grown, mature men let their friends dictate their friendships and relationships anyway.
I still didn't need to know that, it hurt my feelings. I deleted them off my socials since I guess I cannot trust them either.
He wants me to be in a relationship with him and yet he will still attend a party that I am not invited to.
Gee, really makes a girl wanna commit when you'll throw her under the bus for your friendos!
He plays the 'nice guy,' but this vetting period has revealed how manipulative he actually is.
What did he think telling me that his friends dislike me (when I haven't done shit to them) was gonna do? He was fishing for reassurances, "Oh no, they've got it all wrong about me babe I am SO into you, here, let me post that we're in a relationshit now!!"
Fucking idiot. I am so angry. Good thing most of his shit was from China but I still spent almost $100 on shit that I knew he would like, need, or generally find useful.
Meanwhile he's clearly scrambling to buy me gifts last minute–showed me some tacky Fragrant Jewels shit that I said was stupid to his face. It's like he doesn't even know me after all this time.
Is this what a "friend" would do? Or rather, a guy who's only interested in having a gf?
He said we'd be friends first but he sure isn't acting like it.
What infurtiates me the worst is that if anyone between us should have the "trust issues" and "overprotective" parties, IT'S ME! I literally explained to him that the reason why I was taking it slow and didn't want to hop into another relationship right away is precisely because I jumped into an emotionally/physically abusive relationship after breaking off the engagement with my equally shit ass ex-fiance. I LEARNED MY LESSON AND I AM DONE FOR AWHILE, OK?
Meanwhile his dumbass hasn't been in a relationship in years, which to me is now evident why!
I hate his pickmeisha and neckbeard friends for their bullshit ~*~poor innocent men~*~ narrative they're trying to force. I would LOVE to say this shit to their faces, but of course that would just prove me "unhinged" in their smug, beady eyes. They don't fucking know me and it's none of their fucking business.
WOMEN ARE THE ONES WHO CANNOT TRUST MEN. I just wanna throw these dumb gifts on his front door and then block him. I've caught him in too many of his manipulations and I can see through his feeble attempts at acting pathetic, even my mom thinks so.
No. 1802401
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>>1802380TFW I’ve never had a girlfriend but scrotes like this can get a woman to marry them
No. 1802403
>>1802401Just be a manipulative piece of shit who lies to everyone in your shared circle until your gf is gaslit into thinking she's the problem and you're king shit.
He lies about his art for money, as an example.
No. 1802430
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>>1802401>>1802403I was kinda judging her too for liking the guy and somehow getting fooled into thinking he was an artist. If my boyfriend made something like this I would pass away from second hand embarrassment.
No. 1802469
>>1802454It has nothing to do with trust, believe it or not sometimes privacy is nice and
trusting that your partner understands that is very comforting. I don’t mind them picking up my phone and checking something but if you feel the need to go through my phone for no reason maybe re-evaluate what you define as trust lol. Phones contain a myriad of private conversations that sometimes might involve your partner while you process things and your partner isn’t supposed to ingest and subsequently internalize every interaction you have had with other people, it’s quite unhealthy.
No. 1802478
>>1802454I understand why women do it.
When men demand it, it's because they're controlling narcissists who may or may not be projecting.
No exceptions, ime.