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File: 1694794118605.png (41.02 KB, 236x236, parrot.png)

No. 1698871

let out all your problems nonnies
previous thread >>>/ot/1687969

No. 1698876

Nonnas, how do you keep your elderly parents internet safe? How do you keep them from downloading viruses, responding to scams, and putting weird shit on their computers? I wanna cry. It feels like the two of them have done something insane to their device every time I see them. Especially my dad. He thinks I'm tech illiterate because I'm a woman but I swear on my life… They just won't listen. It's so frustrating and upsetting.

No. 1698880

>>1698876
You can’t help people who don’t want to listen. Let them get scammed.

No. 1698883

>>1698876
if your dad doesn't respect you, you can't help him. otherwise you have to tell them to avoid downloading things and could tell them to send you links or screenshots of what they do before downloading. and remind them if something sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

No. 1698887

>>1698876
Basic but I know but download ublock origin, https everywhere and use storage sense to clean junk data if they use microsoft

No. 1698889

>>1698887
This isn't going to do shit.
>>1698876
Tell them not to give any credentials via phone (scams) or clicking sketchy emails links. It's hard but the biggest security threat is always going to be human error. I have a friend who got banned from his bank for responding to a scam and handing over all his banking info and they didn't believe he was scammed. He's around my age so it doesn't just happen to boomers, zoomers are even more tech illiterate.

No. 1698895

Anons in the last thread talking about Croatia like it's some war torn hell hole tourists should avoid are so funny. Sure, it's technically EE and it's plenty shitty for people living there but no tourist will ever see nor experience any of that. It's not even a cheap tourist destination anymore.

No. 1698899

>>1698876
Linux Mint. It won't stop them falling for scams but Linux is secure enough by default that it stops most of the weird shit that happens to windows. Mint is a beginner distro that's easy to use and comes with it's own software repo that works like an app store only everything is free. They might even prefer Mint to windows because the UI is much cleaner compared to steaming dog shit UI that's part of Win10 and Win11.

>>1698895
Croatia is probably in a better state than the US or Western Europe at this point.

No. 1698913

>>1698895
This is true for a most developing and poor countries, it might be shit for the people living there but a foreign tourist will mostly frequent safe, rich neighborhoods and go to places where all you see are other foreign tourists.

No. 1698914

Life is a cabaret I wanna smoke in it naked all night longg

No. 1698924

Mumsnet is normally a great community for sound advice but there are some really odd cunts about.

I've been:
>taunted about the value of my home
>called a pedophile and told i shouldn't be a teacher when i complained about being harassed by male students

No. 1698931

Morale is extremely low

No. 1698938

When i was in HS i got told twice i was pretty, once by a group of girls and then by a boy, but i have never been called pretty again. Does that mean it did the opposite of growing into my features and became uglier or were they always lying? i sometimes i wish i could just post my photo on those shitty rate me reddit subs so i could be told the truth for once

No. 1698943

>>1698938
it means no one has called you pretty. most women are not being told randomly by other women or men they are pretty, their friends or significant others will compliment and call them pretty.

No. 1698948

>>1698943
what if no moid that has ever been interested in me told me that? i know its petty but i rejected all of them because if they dont find me pretty why bother

No. 1698950

I fucking hate that people care more about dogs than women, it makes my blood boil.

No. 1698952

>>1698943
this doesn't make sense

No. 1698957

This faggot at my university is literally the most insufferable attention-seeking loser I’ve ever had the displeasure of having classes with. On top of being an ugly fat fem (think nikacado) who genuinely believes any straight/masculine guy who gives him attention will fuck him, he’s straight up a liar. He lies about his ethnicity (he’s 100% white telling one group of people he’s 2% indigenous and others he’s 40%), lies about his health, he lies about boyfriends and who he’s had sex with. He fakes trauma to one up women in our class. Everybody hates this man but he keeps wriggling his way into every fucking party and event forcing everyone to awkwardly listen to him lying about having cancer, having an estranged son with some girl who raped him in his sleep (lol?) or the time he had sex with a fashion week model who’s never even set foot in our country before.

I never liked his energy. He was close with most of the women in our class because he was charismatic until one of his now ex-friend’s connected the dots and called him out on the lying and now everyone just keeps their distance except his only friend who is just as insecure and pathetic as he is. I talked to him the other day out of curiosity and it only took 3 sentences for him to randomly trauma dump about some random straight guy who queerbaited him (he was polite while holding a reasonable amount of eye contact, and told him he was straight). Then he started ranting about how his ex-friend was a homophobic slut, how he saw her boyfriend on Grindr and how he can’t wait to fuck him. I asked to see the profile, and it was not anyone remotely close to the boyfriend. The guy had the same name, but the age was much older, the man was showing bulge and the body was jacked even though the boyfriend was a twiggy, introverted type who wouldn’t even take his shirt off at a beach. The guy he sent messages to had not even responded after 4 days. Genuinely deranged.

I wish nothing but the worst for him in our industry.

No. 1698962

I want to kill myself. There is a group of young people who are here for training in my work building and my workplace is right next to the outside exit and they like to congregate there. They're loud and you know, like young people are. I know they are not the problem, I need to remind myself this every time; I am the one with a problem; I am the one who is abnormal. Anyway, I definitely need to go back on prozac. I feel so inadequate around them and feel that they are judging me, like an anon said yeah I do have severe self-esteem issues but I have managed all these years by working in a place where the majority are old people and avoiding places that young people like to go to. I am hating myself so bad right now I wish someone would come in and stab me. Even my nausea went away because of how pitiful I am feeling right now lol. I wish I could go home and never work again or go to a public place. i know this is anonymous but I feel that I annoy people just by posting this, but I have nowhere to post. I am so sorry and I hope everyone else is having a good day; yes i also have a huge problem with guilt.

No. 1698963

I used to enjoy LC a lot but lately I've been using it less and less because of the constant infighting and general atmosphere and whenever I come back and scroll through /ot/ wanting to like it again I'm just kinda lost wondering how I could've enjoyed LC so much previously. Did LC culture change so much or did I just grow out of LC?

No. 1698972

>>1698963
The culture did shift I think, and There was a farmhand post in /meta/ >>>/meta/63136 alluding to some anons just coming here specifically to infight. You might have also grown out of LC, I don't know you like that lol. When it comes to retards trying to fight I'd just ignore them.

No. 1698974

>>1698963
Both. I think COVID kinda killed imageboard culture because before 2019 it wasn't even half as annoying to browse here and I would have considered befriending one or two anons here and there. But idk, maybe staying inside and being anon unleashed the beast in some people because farmers will be obviously new to chan culture but try and "enforce" it in the most obnoxious ways. It's even annoying to read up on my favorite cows because you'll have some retard sperging out on someone who called LC a forum instead of an imageboard, without understanding the Chinese basket weaving forum meme or something like that. You get people who don't know why /PT/ is called /PT/ accusing you of being a newfag because you "reddit spaced" and it's leaking into the modstaff too. They think imageboard culture is just being an obnoxious argumentative dickhead every chance you get because they grew up on Fox news and CNN telling them that only the baddest of the bad use chanboards, instead of the reality of chanboards being mainly used by autists from all walks of life.

No. 1698987

>>1698810
Big advice. Don't move in with your next boyfriend. Move in with him when he's your husband.

No. 1698994

File: 1694803108607.jpeg (625.49 KB, 1170x647, 24251A47-9FBC-4C03-95D9-1621F5…)

Went through my first heartbreak/breakup at the start of June and I’m still not okay and pretty fucked up from it. The relationship wasn’t healthy, I started going to therapy to try and process everything in order to move on, my therapist thinks my ex was a narcissist.
Since we’ve broken up 3.5 months ago he has smeared my name to anyone who will listen and has had me blocked everywhere. I don’t know why it still hurts. I know I wasn’t in a great place mentally and I know that I did things that were probably hurtful but I don’t hate him, I don’t know why he still hates me or why i'm even bothered that he does. i knew him for 5-6 years prior to dating him (we dated for around 1 year), idk how to get over the fact that we will probably never speak again.

No. 1698996

>ready to chill on a Friday, decide to hop into a game of league of legends before I play Sims
>picking and banning champs
>teammate starts typing in chat that the Yasuo support was in his last game and he was griefing a bunch of games
>"Ok, just dodge please"
>No, I'm just going to pick Yuumi and go AFK"
>"Just dodge instead of ruining the game for the rest of us"
>"You do it. He's the one ruining the game not me"
I literally do not understand the mentality of league players. Someone fucks up your game so when you get matched with them again, your line of thinking is "let me fuck up someone else's game and sit here, upset and not doing shit for 20 minutes and risk getting reported by like 8 people when I could just dodge an deal with the autofill + dodge timer." Literally so stupid.

No. 1698997

gulls i am very scared, i was given Cipro after getting diagnosed with kidney infection and that medication is KNOWN for horrid side effects, some even permanent. i couldn’t get the medication changed either. i deep dived into the world of “floxies” who struggle with side effects months to years later.
i’m so scared.

No. 1699001

>>1698871
i don't really have much of a community or friend group anymore. i had a good close knit group of online friends two years ago but as everyone got on with their lives and other things it kinda fizzled. i have opporunties to join and talk with other groups and people but i find it difficult and can neever get myself to truly engage with them all. i know it all just stems from being insecure. I was drinking a lot at the time i met the other friend group so shyness wasnt really on my mind

No. 1699005

>>1698997
Anon, think about how many people take a popular antibiotic like that everyday. If thousands of people a day wound up crippled or with severe permanent side effects I don't think they'd still be prescribing it to patients unless they want a massive class action lawsuit. If the doctor prescribed it for approved uses like a complicated UTI, you should be fine.

No. 1699011

>>1698997
Most people take it with no issues. Known lots of ppl get it and they had no problems including my dad and bf and multiple friends.

No. 1699013

File: 1694804639344.jpg (125.84 KB, 735x653, 418cba1eebcea789a3705556e07fdf…)

Can the hungry hippos pick up the god damn phone? I know for a damn fact they are discussing amongst themselves what food to eat for the whole gaggle. At this point I have been waiting on the line for over an hour and im ready to walk up in their clinic to pick the damn phone for them. I NEED MY RESULTS. DO I HAVE CANCER OR NOT. HOLY SHIT PICK UP. Every single time I am there, they are talking about food or candy. I know they see the phone ringing and I completely understand why they do not give a shit, but I am at my wit's end. Also fuck my doctor for not responding, it's been over 72 hours. It's been a whole ass week trying to get into contact.

No. 1699018

>>1699013
Pinwheels are still delish though. I could fuck with some banana marshmallow pies too, but they're really sweet.

No. 1699036

>>1699013
Nothing tastes good to me anymore because I’m withdrawing from antidepressants. I have no appetite and I want to KMS.

No. 1699039

>>1699013
Take a deep breath anon, you're not the only person in your position at their office. You're going to worry yourself sick, I'd say give them till Monday before you call back again.

No. 1699042

I hate being ugly. Sometimes I just feel so jealous of women that are naturally beautiful. I'm not saying they don't experience hardships or anything like that, but people (both men AND women) will straight up treat you better. You get more opportunities. There's people who's entire reason of being wealthy or famous is simply being pretty.
Like, I'm not mad at pretty women, that's not my point, I'm just jealous of how they're treated, that's all.

No. 1699044

File: 1694806156227.jpeg (174.56 KB, 1179x1158, C002305E-0004-440C-8B0A-CB7DB2…)

I’m about 75% positive I’m going to kill myself tomorrow while Nigel is at work. He usually works from home but works from the office as required on a regular basis. If not today then likely soonish, before next year chance goes up to like 99%. Currently in the middle of smoking a joint and feeling better about staying alive for the time being. Well, not giving a shit is more like it.

I’m really going to miss my cats and my dog. My dog is going to take it the hardest and I feel the worst for her tbh, but at least she’s a senior dog so she won’t have to live like forever like Hachiko missing me. The humans in my life will 100% be better off without me barring a couple female friends who actually will be hurt by this
I know they don’t read here but hell if they ever do, K I’ve known you since we were in 5th grade and I love you. Please make sure my puppy dog finds a loving mama and I’m so sorry for leaving her, I know you didn’t want me to leave and you’re worried about my soul but we have diff beliefs regarding that I think, if you ever wanna try and to make contact my spirit/soul symbol will be peacocks esp albino/white ones but all peacocks. A, I have known you for a long time but not as long and I love you too, I know you and your man are gonna get what you need and deserve in this life. I’ll be watching both of your families grow and protecting you guys if that’s like a thing.

My mom pretty much just told me she hates me and how much I make her wish she was dead and how much she hates visiting me and seeing me. Always knew my dad felt that way about me but I guess my mom was just good at hiding it kek. Fuck you, yes you’re a bitch, and if you were half as kind and patient with me growing up and K and A are with their girls I wouldn’t be in this sad fucking situation. And K and A would never let a man like my father be around their girls to bully and abuse their whole lives. You’re such a fake phony ass bitch. I knew it, I fucking knew it in my gut. Go bitch to me about my dad he’ll take your side and run way far away with it you guys can despise me together.

My Nigel’s family hates me so much and we cannot afford to live in the house he bought anymore. Why, cause we have a mortgage and don’t own it outright and homeowners insurance is insane and we were already barely making ends meet before it quadrupled in price this year. As did like everything else it seems. His rich evil family is letting him live in a bigass place they have at cost (they own it outright so just maintenance fees and taxes+utilities, aka wayyyyy cheaper than current costs for our much smaller home in a much less prime metro). The caveat is I can’t live there with him despite us having lived there together here for nearly 5 years and dated for way longer. They hate me because I’m disabled and don’t come from a well off family and no this isn’t some Hindu shit it’s just classist burger bullshit, and they hate that im disabled with health conditions, they literally just tell my Nigel to replace me. That’s not on the table for him but we have to have like plans in place for when they visit for how I have to hide in a closet in a big dress container(?!) or in a trunk or hurry and get dressed and fuck off somewhere anytime they pop by to visit. I am someone who gets chronic migraines and the mere thought of having to do any of that on a migraine attack day (yea I have rescue meds but I still feel pain and need to be in a dark quiet room laying down and need to generally take 2-3 of the rescue meds over a 6-9 hour period and I feel awful both before and after they occur) makes
Me wanna be dead. I’ve already almost died from a suicide attempt before. My first attempt was a total dud (you’re only dying from benzos and alcohol mixed if you’re like, super unhealthy or also doing opiates or have some health condition, even tons of benzos and alcohol mixed doesn’t kill the average healthy 20 something even if there is no medical intervention besides friends making sure no vomit gets aspirated). However a Wellbutrin OD will fuck you up even with medical intervention you could die especially if we’re talking high dose like a 3 month supply of 300 mg xl yeah you a ded bitch even if you go to the ER. Anyway I’m done typing my joint went out gonna re light and take a nap and reconsider what my life or end of life should look like

No. 1699051

>>1699044
If you're going to kill yourself you should break up with him first. Don't wait for him to go to work and come home to you dead. That's incredibly fucked up especially if his family has been giving him shit about being with you. You'd just be proving everyone right about needing to drop you. I think a better game plan is to live, live in spite of it all and then on top of that, thrive. I think you, your Nigel and your pets will all be happier if you choose that. It will get better eventually nona, you just have to keep existing.

No. 1699052

>>1699044
Please cut your mother out. Anon you deserve to be loved and cared for, don't let a mentally ill person's projection of her bad choices make you suicidal. She regrets marrying your father and having you? That's HER fault! You didn't force her to marry him, to have you, to take raise you OR treat you badly. It's all her own mistakes that led to her shitty life, not yours. If you kill yourself, she will only use that to get pity from people and won't ever feel bad for what she made you go through. Please dont do this, your pets love you, animals are capable of love. You'll have friends in the future that'll be happy you decided not to end it all. Please doht do it

No. 1699056

>>1699044
Cut your mother out and the nigel too. If he can't stick up for you against his shitty family he doesn't love you. I'm sure your female friends would be willing to help you out.

No. 1699061

>>1699044
Instead of killing yourself you really should just address this issue with your Nigel and be direct with him. It's painful but if your only other option is to die, then what do you have to lose? Dump him. Tell him that you can't live in a situation where his family openly hates you and you have to physically hide (wtf??) when they come to visit. I don't know what disability you have but if you're capable of killing yourself then you can't be physically disabled, so there's a way up and you don't need a wrangler to take care of you. Get a job at a call center or a similar low level entry place where you don't have to be in physical contact with people but gives you financial autonomy. Killing yourself is a tempting though but a lame way to go until you've exhausted every possibility. Fuck your family too, you deserve a better life and it starts with cutting that bullshit from your life.

No. 1699062

Lately I’ve wanted to start cutting again because my life feels so hopeless. I’ve been unemployed for months, am only around my dad all day bc I live at home, and haven’t dated anyone in a year because I’m fucking unemployed and fixing that is my first priority. I made the mistake of looking up my ex and he’s thriving. His current relationship is lasting longer than ours did, he’s following all his dreams, and he seems to be so genuinely happy where he is atm. I thought he would do the same shit in his next relationship but maybe it really was just me all along. He told me I was going to be miserable and alone forever and lately it feels like he’s right. I just want to end my life when I think about it because everything turned out the way he said it would.

No. 1699063

>>1699044
how does your Nigel defend you from your shitty in-laws, how can he choose to live with them when they treat his girlfriend like this? how the fuck did it get to his partner hiding from his family, is he a fucking baby? what a spineless bastard. monsters-in-law are a real phenomenon and if you need to leave him because of his family, do it.

you mention Hindus, is he Indian and you're not? As a desi woman men (and women too tbh) in our cultures are raised to put the family first and regularly face pressure not to marry outside the ethnicity/culture.

if you need money or financial help please consider asking friends or trying one last time to access state services. fuck your family and his family and consider going no contact, but you are right it will devastate your friends and make them wonder if they could have done anything. i'm not going to make a "please you have so much to live for" response but please try for yourself and those who actually care about you to manage the problems making you feel suicidal, and then considering it.

No. 1699067

File: 1694807628727.jpeg (42.16 KB, 1010x688, 60328D5C-218B-466A-B8E4-15B620…)

>>1699061
I am physically disabled unfortunately and literally can’t even work 5-6 hours a week at home. My mobility is limited (inb4 fatty I’m bmi 19) and grabbing a bottle of pills and downing them before tying a noose around my neck and leaning forward on a doorknob is something I can do but standing on my feet all day or being in an office 3 hours a day 2+ days a week isn’t and wouldn’t pay bills. Tried sex work got traumatized fuck that shit. Even if I managed to work like 20 hrs (never have and I’m nearing 30 years old) it wouldn’t cover any expenses. Literally there are no other options. I can’t even drive due to my disabilities, my medicine makes me unable to drive safely even if I knew how, in a state with no public transport to speak of kek. Idk I’m no fucking catch and I need a caretaker and my parents sure as fuck can’t/won’t and I’ve applied for SSI but won’t know what’s up with that until next summer and will probably need to get a lawyer to appeal and that’ll take like 2-3+ more years and also would not be enough to live in even a roommate situation with. And then there’s me needing a gluten free cooking space cause I’m celiac and needing low temp 72 degrees no hotter cause heat sensitivity I’m a piece of shit to live with who is going to accommodate my ass nonnies asking in all seriousness frfr

No. 1699072

I'm honestly tired of trying to be friendly with my stepbro when he makes absolutely zero effort. Even the way he talks to me it's like i'm diseased or something and my mom asked him if he hates me and he said no but his behaviour with me indicates otherwise. I didn't do anything to him, I'm a shy person but I genuinely tried to be nice but he doesn't even want to talk with me.

No. 1699073

>>1699044
>we have to have like plans in place for when they visit for how I have to hide in a closet in a big dress container(?!) or in a trunk
uhhhh he should be telling them to fuck off and defending you from their nasty selves not kowtowing to mommy and daddy and making you hide. i hope this is made up, please please say sike.

No. 1699074

>>1698962
I wish I could give you a hug anon. Don't feel guilty just for existing.

No. 1699075

>>1699063
Nah he’s just another white dude his family are just racist classist ableist white people and I’m a lower class mentally and physically disabled white person. It’s funny, his mom literally drunkenly murdered a man and showed 0 remorse and blamed the man she murdered for being on the road. They paid millions for her to serve no time and my Nigel remembers her making him blow into the breathalyzer attached to her car to start the engine when he was in fifth grade. They looooove her but I guess the difference is she made a mistake whereas I AM a mistake. His family are stone cold psychos tbh. The casual racism that gets thrown around is enough to make me wanna run for the hills and then they constantly take him aside to tell him ableist shit to get him to leave me, like while I’m in the bathroom. he says he knows I have problems but I’m his best friend and he loves me and it doesn’t matter to him and they just kinda like go mmm disapprovingly.

I’m sobbing writing this but I tried asking my family and friends for money and they are all either dead broke and super sorry they can’t help or they were really straight up mean to me and called me an entitled brat for asking nicely (literally just asking and explaining the situation not demanding or begging). I have applied for SSI which is the only state service I can really get and it takes years to obtain. I just don’t know why it has to be like this. I’ve always wanted a mom and dad to love me more than anything honestly and it’s something I’ll never have and it breaks my heart.

No. 1699078

File: 1694808547123.jpeg (112.16 KB, 1179x1112, C99FC88C-1435-4742-823D-C8777B…)

>>1699073
If we weren’t struggling so hard and not going to have to move out of the house he has a mortgage to I’d say psych but sadly it true. We’ve been living off credit for bit now. We’ll be able to make a profit off selling this shithole he’s paying so much a month for and also save money by paying so much less and living in a metro with way higher salaries for him. It just feels precarious af for me and I just wanna be accepted by his family fuck

No. 1699079

>>1698997
This was me a month ago. I was deathly afraid to take the antibiotic until I was in so much pain. I took 7 days of the 250mg dose and was fine. The only side effect I had was muscle tightness here and there. Take it easy because it can make you a little dizzy and don't have dairy on it. In my case I'm still having complications from my UTI but you'll be just fine anon. Have someone be there while you take it everyday if possible, that helped me a lot.

No. 1699080

File: 1694808686961.jpeg (93.03 KB, 542x576, 6E92F848-69BF-4A8B-B590-D6F58C…)

>>1699075
Oh btw Samefag but bitch blew a .27 when she was pulled over which is over 3.5 times the legal limit

No. 1699083

>>1699078
>I just wanna be accepted by his family fuck
his family literally has a murderer and they defended her
they sound evil and self-centered, looking for acceptance from a family like that doesn't seem worth it for you.
>I’ve always wanted a mom and dad to love me more than anything honestly and it’s something I’ll never have and it breaks my heart.
oh poor nonny, this is such a natural feeling. i'm so sorry, but everyone reading this and you too know you cannot get this feeling from your family or his. mourn it as you deserve but please don't go chasing their approval. i think reading about narcissists and radical acceptance may help you. plan for your nigel and you to get what you can (materially, socially, etc.) out of your and his relationship to them but don't be seriously emotionally invested.

it sounds like your boyfriend really does need to defend you better, you shouldn't have to hide every time they come. but if you want to avoid them for your own sake, cutting off contact with them and avoiding them when they come doesn't sound like the worst idea.if selling your house should make you a profit, try to keep going and see what that brings your financial situation, okay?

No. 1699084

>>1699067
That's fucked. Good luck.

No. 1699087

I'm scared of going to detox because I'm a very functional addict and feel like my life will crumble apart for real if I walk out of there and have to never do opiates again. The "drugs" feel more like medicine. I'm not injecting anything so I feel like if I ask to be put on methadone or buprenorphine they'll say it's not bad enough to justify it and I should get comfortable with the idea of going to medical detox (being stuck in a hospital ward for a week with various IV fluids including fucking ketamine). I guess I just want my pill-popping routine and keep going about my day as usual and eventually slowly stop over the span of months. From one week to another sounds so brutal, it makes me anxious just thinking about it. It's not that I don't want to get better, I'm really scared of dying if I keep taking this crap, but it feels like no one understands how it's affecting me physiologically and mentally.

No. 1699088

File: 1694810118718.jpeg (35.7 KB, 552x576, 5B3625C0-A4C9-46F9-B0B7-BB7B59…)

>>1699083
Thank you so much for your response. I agree with you. I finished smoking my joint, chilled out. I gave my dog belly rubs and cuddles and a snack. I gave all my kitties snacks and kisses on their soft little heads and carried around the little one who enjoys being carried and snuggled and now I’m cuddling her in bed for a nap. I wanna stay around for these sweet companions animals and my girl friends and I hope my Nigel gets a good enough job and/or that his grandparents hurry up and die and leave him the house in the will so they’re not a worry anymore and ties with both families can be cut cause fuck em both.

No. 1699094

File: 1694810571534.jpg (17.57 KB, 400x266, tumblr_n54u863lCP1rdlxrco1_400…)

I'm not sick, I do not feel sick, I had my last fever in Jan 2022, I do not ever sneeze or cough, my belly never hurts aside from menstrual pain, my joint don't hurt, I can breathe perfectly, perfect blood oxygen, no ashtma, no allergies, my heart is perfect, I never have headaches, my lymphonodes are never swollen and yet my anxiety tells me something's very wrong. Yes I got "organically" checked. I cannot afford a therapist before November and I want to cry because I don't want to live with these constant thoughts for two more months… Please nonna tell me I'm stupid and I'm healthy, it's just my head that's fucked.

No. 1699102

The other night my boyfriend was yelling at me and asked me if I was retarded. I asked him if he called me retarded, and he said "a little". I slapped him, I immediately regretted it, but the night before that he has been yelling at me regularly. He knows what that word means to me, I told him that ever since I was a child my father used to regularly scream and remind me that I was retarded due to my constant panic attacks at 10. I had so much insecurity about my intelligence and that word specifically, even my mom and her boyfriend would question me, he knows how I feel about it, and he knows what that means to me. I have been trying so hard to get better, I have been going to therapy, but the past few nights it feels as if he has been yelling at me more and more, and I just brokedown and lashed out. I know what I did was terrible. I got reminded of my father and did it. I feel terrible. I feel like I am an abusive piece of shit. He told me that he said it because he was trying to hurt me, and we both forgave each other, but I still feel terrible. I don't know why I act this way. There was another time where I hit his arm when he kept yelling at me. I'm going to tell my therapist and ask her how to get better, because I don't want to be this way anymore. I feel like I am a horrible person. I don't know if I'll ever stop being so childish. I don't know why I react that way when I get told those things, I wish I could get over it.

No. 1699117

>>1699102
Dump him tbh. He knew your boundaries and crossed them anyway to make you purposely uncomfortable. If you stay with him it's only going to get worse.

No. 1699122

>>1699102
You need to break up with him. He said "a little" kek he knew what he was doing, and admitted it to you. You do not need to be in a relationship with somebody who will use your insecurities you told them in confidence to hurt you. You need somebody stable who respects and supports you. This is crazy, he deserved to be slapped.

No. 1699127

File: 1694812526504.jpg (486.92 KB, 1080x1486, original.jpg)

i feel like im stuck in life because of my family. i recently turned 18 and i feel desperate to try to start my life. my family is very strict and religious and not to mention we're pretty poor. im not allowed to do anything, enjoy anything, have interests at all. music, movies, videos, games, basically anything that isn't hypereligious is considered the devil.
i can't drive to get anywhere. I don't have a license because my parents won't teach me and i don't have the money to pay for lessons. im not allowed to get a job even though i would be able to pay for the little things i need and would take my dad a couple weeks to work for. i want to make a bank account so i could maybe get a job anyways but my dad has all our papers locked away. i feel like im trapped. they're even trying to control what im studying (my dad has a grand idea of me being an english teacher at an islamic school in saudia arabia). i thought i could at least get through college and then leave but im slowly going crazy, it would be a miracle if i don't kill myself before the end of this year.
i don't have any friends and have been socially isolated for so long because my parents have always told me that friendship isn't real. i try to talk to people but i just can't keep a conversation and sound like a nervous child about to have a breakdown. i feel so far away from being normal and defunct of any personality. i don't know anything about anything and am too retarded to talk to others. i just want to live a normal life, i want to celebrate my birthday and go outside and do stuff but i don't know how.
i wish i had a different life with an average normie family where i could go outside and do stuff and not feel like im going to die. i want to cut off my family and run away or move out (with what money…) but the guilt of leaving my parents on their own with their brady bunch number of kids is eating me alive. but stupidly enough, the fact that im surrounded by my large family despite being isolated from the outside world is the only reason i think i haven't started harming myself. i don't know what to do.

No. 1699129

>>1699094
Anxiety can really mess with your head even when your body is physically healthy. You're gonna be ok anon, it'll be November before you know it. Take it one day at a time and try to keep yourself distracted. You're going to get through this.

No. 1699132

>>1699102
He purposely dug up your trauma to hurt you, yet you think you're the abusive one? You didn't do anything wrong nonna. Your boyfriend is actively malicious, what a miserable person to be around

No. 1699139

File: 1694813458369.jpg (39.96 KB, 640x479, tumblr_b25b6a3c3fe0048d480b763…)

>>1699129
thank you nona… ily…
I hope to get back to enjoy my hobbies and distract myself with them, lately I've been here a lot due to me being afraid to annoy my nigel, friends and family, I feel safe when I speak here, thank you. I also have a bad habits of googling shit like "what are the symptoms of (various bad diseases)" to see if I check any of them sigh.
For now I'll try to focus on my job, my kitty and getting myself little treats, since I finally have some money and I like to feel I am my own princess…not a consoomer, I just like some nice perfumes to spray on my pillow before sleeping and silver jewelry…I hope that taking care of me helps a little….

No. 1699152

>>1699127
Jfc nonny. I cannot imagine being in this situation. I'm so sorry. It sounds like a nightmare. Hopefully college will allow you to naturally make distance from them and then start your own life but it's not guaranteed. You may need to do take actions they call heartless. If that's what happens, do it. This is your life and we don't live forever. You've been living for your family for eighteen years. You have to live for yourself. I believe in you.

No. 1699157

>>1699127
I don't know what country you live in, but depending on the country, it is illegal to hold your papers from you. I know legality doesn't necessarily mean anything unless you get police involved (which would probably cause a lot of trouble for you). I would start trying to find out if you can get a bank account without your parents knowing (or without their access), so you can start hoarding any money you can get. There may also be services in your area that can help you. Good luck nonna. I can't imagine the difficult situation you're in.

No. 1699158

>>1699127
This sounds awful, I am so sorry to hear about your situation nona. If you are at college can you not talk to the support teams there and see if they can help?

No. 1699160

File: 1694816657180.gif (51.07 KB, 306x662, ade7beb6b4b9a3d72d51890b5d10f3…)

>>1699152

thank you nona.
i do want to start living for myself. i am going to try to find my papers and open a bank account + get a job. i've always been terrified of going being behind their back due to their abuse and because i don't want to lose my family and be alone forever. there is still so much i don't know, (embarrassingly basic things i think might be programmed into the everyday person) so i'm not very confident on my ability to survive by myself. i feel happy knowing i can still talk to you guys here (take that mom and dad >:-D) so im not completely isolated.(>:-D)

No. 1699166

>>1699127
i want to save u anon

No. 1699171

my awesome grandpa died last month, very draining physically and mentally, massive funeral, hundreds of people. during this my online best mate just dropped off the face of the earth. typically we’ll fill eachother in with our lives and how we’re going, send memes. for a good month and a half it was radio silence. i was understandably upset and getting mad at them, when they finally replied. their grandpa had died as well. of course i felt bad for pestering them but i felt like we could have helped eachother with our grief, i’ve known this person going on 5 years. then yesterday i found out my grandma (other side of family) is dying too! i cant help but feel selfish in a way, i know its awful but i’ve lost so many friends, ive always supported this person, and at our lowest when we could have supported one another they ghost me. the day after i get an explanation from them, my fucking grandma is dying.

No. 1699185

I’ve had a fucking awful migraine for about a week now and I’m about to reach my limit. None of my migraine meds are working and it just won’t let up. I’m starting to understand people who kill themselves because of physical pain now. I just want to sob and sleep until it goes away

No. 1699197

File: 1694821342833.jpg (486.41 KB, 1134x1577, D-txr9RU0AE9z7D.jpg)

>>1699127

update:
it seems the universe is playing its own fucked up mind game with me. right after posting this my parents told me that my siblings and mom are moving back to their home country (a third world war torn shithole) so that they could learn their religion. and worst of all im being left her with my stupid dad and my sister who is undergoing hospital treatment. i wish i could at least have my mom by my side even if she does side with my dad for everything. i thought i would be able to finally live my life but there is no chance of that being alone with my dad. what's even worse is the fact that my parents told me that i would be cooking and cleaning for my dad, basically taking my moms role and playing housemaid. what did i even do to deserve this. my only distraction were my little siblings. as much as i want to be free and get away, im scared of being on my own. i've never been (almost) by myself and i don't know how to live or interact with the outside world. how do i get out of this now?
also im so scared for my siblings, why would my parents think to sacrifice their future is 1st world country to be forced to learn a religion they don't care about?

>>1699158
im from the US and a couple of years ago i called the cops because i was being beaten a lot that night. they told me that since they were my parents, they had every right to beat me and so i've never trusted them again. i want to steal the papers and hide them with myself. i don't have any money to my name and don't receive any from my family but i will look into places i could go.

>>1699158
im scared of talking to other people about my situation, what if gets back to my parents? i tried calling the cops and that only aggravated the situation and made my life worse.

>>1699166
i want to go to you nona.

No. 1699209

>>1699185
I'm so sorry, that sounds awful. I have awful week-long migraines too over periods of time so I'm sure you have looked up every relief method there is, but I want to help anyway since I have a whole list of things I do during those weeks to not go insane from the pain. Knowing that the pain won't go away, have you tried temporary relief methods such as hot/cold therapy? You can do it by putting your head under the shower and switch between really hot and icy cold water which can help divert the pain while you do it. Tying something tight around your head can also help by adding pressure. The idea is to mainly give you a break from the pain by replacing it with an equally intense, but different sensation. Sometimes it can help to just sob and cry it out, just make sure you breathe right and blow your nose to avoid building pressure in your sinuses. A sinus rinse with a neti pot can also be nice as a temporary distraction, and less extreme than the other two I suggested. I hope your pain goes away soon. It's a nightmare and I hope you get to rest and sleep peacefully once its over!

No. 1699217

>>1698924
>called a pedophile and told i shouldn't be a teacher when i complained about being harassed by male students

I remember your post from several months back and yeah I hope you learned your lesson from using online spaces as a sounding board for what you should be handling through disciplinary avenues via the school like a professional in order to prevent continuation of harassment at best or loss of your job at worst.

No. 1699227

>>1699209
Fuck they're really shitty arent they? I'll try the hot/cold when I shower tonight. I'll try anything at this point kek. Thank you for your kind words nonna, you're wonderful.

No. 1699273

An ex best friend (who I had a very gradual cut off with because she just… kinda went crazy? Off topic but she’s really milky) had the police and a few ambulances show up at her house, according to a family friend who lives near her. She was sitting outside on the deck when it happened, so she’s alright physically. Before this all happened, a very unreliable person who I really don’t like told me at random that her psychotic ex boyfriend broke into her house and she had to install a security system to keep him away. I’m really not surprised by that though given how fucking awful he was when they were dating. Maybe it was him again.
Why were there multiple ambulances there though? She lives with her sister so maybe he tried to hurt her? Did he get hurt somehow?

I really wanna know what happened, holy shit. I don’t think I’ll ever actually know and it’s killing me.

No. 1699278

i swear to god i want this IT job but helping my mom with tech stuff and having her be varying stages of smug, sulky, whiny and all-around ass-holish about the process (on top of seeming inability to handle even the simplest prompts and instructions) pisses me off. i hope the job isn't this bad. even if it is i'm at least getting paid there.

i mean asked you TEN goddamn times before reformatting this drive if you were fine with it. i CLEARLY explained what would happen. now it's reformatted and your shit is gone and you're whining about it. i haven't heard a single thank you. just a lot of moaning and groaning as if you're the one struggling to get this crap running. FUCK YOU!!! at least shut the fuck up while i'm moving all this heavy crap for you.

No. 1699280

>>1699278
oh and to top it all off i literally copied it to her computer before i wiped this drive. i don't get why she's whining sooooo hard about it i stg i hate living here. living with a literal goddamn womanchild is the pits. the homecooked meals aren't worth all this stress

No. 1699287

I have so much resentment in my heart and it only grows with age. Is it even possible to get rid of it?

No. 1699303

>>1698876
If they don't respect you, you can try sending them links to videos/articles by someone else that explain how to watch out for that stuff. Like men who work in tech I guess. Some police, government, and library websites also have pages about looking out for scams, so that could work too.
I know off the top of my head that in the comments on scambaiting youtube videos (like Kitboga and Mark Rober), there's always a bunch of boomers blogposting about how the creator's videos taught them the red flags. Those videos are more for entertainment although they do usually devote a section to explaining how the scam typically plays out.

No. 1699304

What did I do to deserve my whole family being torn apart, have genetic conditions and live in a shithole? I just want to be happy and not isolated and miserable but I have no idea what to even do anymore

No. 1699319

My parents used to threaten me about dating (stuff like we'll kill you/send you to our third world country if we see you talking to a boy) and even did so in college and then 180'd their position around 24. It makes me so mad, like genuinely angry. Being threatened or treated like a whore for whatever assumptions they had about me when in reality I just stayed home and studied for all of my youth. Like great, you want me to start looking now that I'm out of school and no longer around peers my own age? What the fuck?
>inb4 they cant make you do anything in college
Couldn't really move out as a poor engineering student with a min wage student job, not like they'd let me move out without threatening to kill me. I also needed their health insurance, which they would threaten to take away.

No. 1699325

>>1699319
If I were you I'd just use their same threats as excuses for why you never plan to date. Fuck them.

No. 1699335

>>1699287
how to do so will depend on why you feel resentment, but i do believe it's possible in most cases. it's both about processing the emotions and embracing a mindset shift. people can forgive and lose resentment for people who seriously harm them. and not because they consider it okay what happened, but they have moved on and don't care anymore. feeling resentment towards people who hurt you is a natural and healthy emotion, but if it is causing you worry you may be suppressing sadness or other emotions.

No. 1699347

My mom pays little attention to my conversations with her. It's mostly one-sided and if anything, she loves to cut me off to inject her opinion without listening to the full thought. It's bittersweet knowing she'll give her undivided attention to a guy older than me. He'll tell her something once and she remembers it but if I tell her something, she'll maybe half ass listen and whine to me that it isn't her fault she forgot despite me saying it numerous times before. I'm not rude when I explain something/or talk about something but it gets tiresome knowing she'll not remember and ask the same question again. It wouldn't surprise me that she harbors resentful towards me and somehow feels like like we're in competition with each other. I've had that feeling since I was a young teen and family history seems to back up this theory. I don't get it and probably will never truly understand it, but I can't help but be sadden by knowing if I had been born a boy, she'd pay more attention to me. I have a brother and she was so up his ass for years until he stopped talking to her.

No. 1699353

feeling so fucking lonely, can't make friends because i'm worthless, boring and awful to people. no hope for me, it seems.

No. 1699355

I don't know what to do. For the past two weeks I've been sleeping for only like 4 hours every night and I'm constantly exhausted. I hate my work and I hate working abroad, I want to go home but I'm scared. One of my coworkers invited me for a trip and I agreed although I wasn't sure how I'm going to feel when the time comes. There's 4 other people. Yesterday I was supposed to book a museum visit, everyone was supposed to book their own visit for the same hour, I didn't do it, one of my coworkers said I didn't look too enthusiastic about the trip and maybe it's better for me not to go than to go and ruin everybody's fun. I knew she was right but I still felt like shit. Also we had more work than usual and we were understaffed. I had a breakdown in the bathroom and I just sat there on the floor for like 15 minutes and cried to the point I got petechiae under my eyes. I was late from my break because of that but I also didn't want anyone to see I was crying. After work so around 00:00 I found out one of the guys also booked the visit for me, and they also moved the schedule of the trip 2 hours forward so I wouldn't have to wake up that early after second shift and we would go at 10:00 instead of 8:00. And I thought ok that's super nice of them I will go. But I woke up at 3:00 at night and I couldn't sleep anymore. It's 7:00 and I still can't sleep and I had another breakdown and cried again. I just want to go home so bad, I don't want to be here anymore. And I don't know what to do about this fucking trip, I will feel like an asshole if I won't go when they moved the schedule especially for me and one of them booked shit for me, but if I force myself to go and I won't be able to not act exhausted and sad, I will ruin everybody's fun, like my coworker said. I don't want to go and force myself to act like I'm fine for at least 7 hours, when I could use this saturday to rest and get some sleep, especially that I also work on sunday. But they already did stuff especially for me and I don't know how to refuse. Both options are bad.

No. 1699357

i hate myself im so fucking fat lmfao i wanna kill myself so bad i miss my eating disorder so bad but I can’t make my brain do it anymore I feel fucking useless

No. 1699362

>>1699353
I really don't think that's the reason you can't make friends.

No. 1699365

>>1699362
then what's the reason? i'm trying to make friends in any way possible, by going outside and talking to people, by leaving my contact info and a little bio in communities i'm a part of, etc

No. 1699372

File: 1694844452157.png (37.24 KB, 703x495, 1694561292124.png)

I stalked the discord servers that my ex used to be a part of and seeing how she interacts in a group setting, I have just come to the realization that she was actually a pretty insufferable and whiny person which I never saw during the relationship. One was a small server from 5 years ago. She would perceive situations to be more negative than they really are and would cry in #general how no one cares about her, throw a self-pity party, and guilt trip every member how they aren't "true friends" because they're not comforting her. I read through the drama unfolding on one of the channels between her and the closest friend she had on there at that time. This friend was apparently stressed out from school, work, and other irl stuff so you can tell she was growing tired of my ex's constant emotional demands, even despite this friend's constant reassurance that she loves her and how she's still her friend but just tired. Actually, you can tell from the chat that even other members there was growing tired of her shit. It's funny because it reminded me the time before we broke up where I was constantly stressed and tired from school, preparing for interviews for internships, part-time job on top of a 4 hour commute every single day. And then she would guilt-trip me how her "emotional demands" aren't being met. And when we went through some petty argument which I didn't feel like getting into, she thought I was "stonewalling" her and how I don't care about her and how I'm being abusive etc, when I'm literally just so fucking tapped out from everything else. Like that was 5 fucking years ago and she's hasn't changed at all in that time. I understand that she's just a very lonely and mentally ill person… but like chill out for once, people don't actually hate you, it's all in your mind for christ's sakes! I used to think clingy girls were adorable because they just "wuv you so much and they want to be with you 24/7 uwu" but now I realize that clinginess is actually a bad thing, because expecting one single person to meet all your emotional needs is really unhealthy, and the relationship with a clingy person is ultimately doomed to fail. There's also another discord server she used to be a part of fairly recently and it's insane how she just made the chat more awkward by instigating conflicts and fights with other members over politics no one but her cares about. Like it's a fucking gaming server, people there just want to shitpost about vidya not talk about how republicans and their policies are fucking awful (she doesn't even live in the states). She also harassed one particular member over his views in his DMs while other members begged her to just leave the poor man alone. Anyway, going through these servers is giving me a sense of closure and peace over the breakup, and it feels like I've finally taken off the rose-coloured glasses where I idealized her too much. The relationship was doomed to fail from the very start and there was really nothing I can do to salvage it. I'm not perfect either, and I don't have the emotional maturity nor intuition to handle the emotions of such a high-strung person, so I lash out sometimes out of frustration. I sometimes wonder if she has some bpd-like traits but I know she's too self-aware and empathic for that. Her traits actually remind me a lot of picrel though. I think she was just high in trait neuroticism, and I mean that as a real thing not a a "women be crazy amirite fellas" kinda thing. Maybe the relationship could have worked out if she had worked through her mental issues but she's still the same even after 5 years. I think these types of mentally ill people with depression and anxiety expect their partner to be their emotional support animal 24/7 and expect you to solve all their problems when they're the ones who can only look from within and solve it themselves. Even when you have all the traits ticked off in their "perfect partner" list, they will never be truly happy.

No. 1699373

File: 1694844515234.png (170.85 KB, 378x314, 1561870737960.png)

Took a few weeks break from lc, come back to make a single post and someone tries to bait an infight within minutes.

No. 1699375

I hate HATE that life is so fucking boring and shit and we're all just a collection of cells with no purpose. Aliens don't exist, god isn't real, ghosts don't exist, magic isn't real, no everything is just so fucking boring and mundane. Just make your life "the best" you can while wasting most of it on a shitty job, living in a shitty city and having shitty relationships. Why exactly should I bother to be oh so amazed by the wonder of life appearing out of nowhere and enjoying the sunset when that's not making me feel any happier. You could literally die any moment and everything is lost.

No. 1699378

>>1699357
We are the same

No. 1699387

>>1699375
magic and cool stuff isn't real but moid depravity is, it's worse, i hate it so much here. why can't we at least get some nice things to compensate for the existence of scrotoids?

No. 1699389

>>1699375
This kind of defeatist attitude and nihilism is why you feel the way you do. People are not simple minded because they actively put effort in to avoid affectation and enjoy small things. Nobody is forcing you to look at a sunset in awe or something. Instead of a condescending, neckbeard tone to "we are just clumps of cells" maybe you should acknowledge that they are vehicles for souls and you yourself have every ability to improve your circumstance or work to changing how you think and feel. Im honestly so sick of internet nihilists.

No. 1699392

>>1699389
Sorry that sounds like a load of nothing. Not everyone can change their life, and changing the way you think still doesn't change your life. You still spend most of it working. It doesn't matter, that's the way our society is built.

No. 1699397

>>1699392
Fucking lol so then what do you have to do? Be angry and threaten to kill yourself? Sorry that not everyone wants to live in abject misery.

No. 1699398

File: 1694847733035.gif (339.06 KB, 354x498, f9ab043a0c16500b24f075d914a671…)

I hate Tinder dating. I hate meeting people from Facebook or from Discord. They never listen unless it is for manipulation to lay me faster, they only rant about themselves and expect me to be their cheerleader while I barely know them, they don't make effort to look good and if they do, they are absolute players who just enjoy the attention. They have attachment issues, weird rape tier fetishes, long history of broken relationships. BPD, ASPD, narcissism, all untreated of course. Why do I keep meeting these types? Am I shit? Why can't they recognize I also have feelings and interests? Is it because I am shy? Is it because I am not rich? Is it because I am not popular? Am I too ugly? Too boring? Many say the opposite yet I get treated like a toss away toy, only strung along to keep me for their benefit before I figure out they're lying. I can't even be myself anymore because they make me feel hopeless and worthless. Why keep doing my hobbies if they never see me for what I do? Why take care of my looks when there is someone more beautiful to seek out? Why try studying when only connections matter and all of them gatekeep? I check their social media and see beautiful and rich people. Professional photos, fancy vacations, big parties with big friend groups. Professions in the most nonessential bullshit fields, still in success and without worry about money. I wonder, do they treat these women better? Do they play them like they did with me? Is it because I am nobody, that I deserved their manipulation? I want to give up. I want to disappear.

No. 1699402

>>1699397
I know that but it's all a cope. And honestly, majority of people really aren't that happy. They keep on living cause that's the only thing they can do

No. 1699404

>>1699389
>>1699397
anon did you forget what thread you're in? let her vent

No. 1699406

>>1699392
>You still spend most of it working.
A very depressing thought but how much have you tried to improve your work situation, or at least give yourself some hope? Aiming to FIRE is a big way to alleviate the suffering for most people, it's not realistic for all but it's something to work towards. You can try jobs with alternative rosters - I have 4 days off every week and still do close to full time hours, it's insane how much it improved my quality of living. I used to work 5 days but did 7am-3pm at an office 10 mins from home which was nice because I had a long afternoon to relax.

Other ideas - working part time hours, WFH or working close to home helps, having early/late/night shift depending on when you like having free time or sleeping, working jobs which are lax/easy/fun even if they aren't high paying. There's no obligation to do a 9-5, Mon-Fri office job with an hour commute, you can try to find alternatives to abject wage slavery.

No. 1699407

>>1699404
Yeah this thread is definitely for stewing in misery only, so is life. In fact it's absolutely based af frfr to be so fragile that you cannot handle conductive conversation, just let everyone mope around all the time about how meaningless life is and how we don't matter. It's so cool to refuse to want to better your thinking and circumstances and very very very bad to have any critical thought about it. The world is a cold and cruel horrible prison and we are all on a hamster wheel therefore we should all die because we are only cells. (No but seriously, I hate this way of thinking because all it does is reduce people to cattle. We don't deserve that kind of treatment and becoming lifeless empty masses only lets them control us further.)

No. 1699414

>>1699389
every point you made is something i think most of us have come to grips with, why cant we wallow now and then? and how can you be so sure that this nona isnt doing anything to better herself? this is an anonymous imageboard afterall, the vent thread specifically. no one really needs your input, or your judgements. you’re not gonna save a life by calling someone a defeatist and telling them to change in one paragraph, so idk what your end goal is here, to prove you’re more strong-minded? weird

No. 1699416

>>1699407
I'm just being realistic I think you're the one who can't cope with the facts…

No. 1699428

I’m in a real low patch and have convinced myself I’m a covert narcissist. I’ve seen people saying that if you’re worried you are one you probably aren’t, but I’m not so sure…

No. 1699430

>>1699428
At this point, I've learned that if someone says they're a terrible person they aren't playing coy and they aren't 'overtly worried and compassionate uwu', they really do usually end up being a terrible person. If you're looking to become more self aware it would be something to think about, I really don't think normal or even anxious people have thoughts like "I might be a covert narcissist" unless they embody the traits associated with it. I would imagine CNs are very good at viewing themselves as victims or be completely oblivious to their own conditions their entire lives.

No. 1699451

>>1699430
That's not really true. People with anxiety have anxiety about all sorts of retarded shit they can't control. And both "normal" and anxious people will be worried about having abusive traits if they've been told they have them, whether the person saying it is being truthful, abusive, or manipulative.
>>1699428
Just look at the way you treat people around you. If you're treating them like shit and manipulating them for your own gain, you're being a bad person. If you want to stop being a bad person, stop behaving like a bad person. Obviously it isn't like flipping a switch, it takes work, but by continually stopping yourself from doing fucked up shit to other people, that's about where "not a fucked up narc" is. The key part is "stopping yourself from doing bad shit". It doesn't count if you fuck people over and go "oh nooo I fucked someone over" and then tell yourself you're being self aware.
That's pretty much it. While taking action is hard, the logic really is that simple.

No. 1699470

>>1699197
Of course, a past experience like that is likely to make you feel this way. I am sorry as I am not from the US but you could try to look into local or even national or even international charities that support with this sort of family abuse.

You have to think, they'd be knowledgeable about this type of situation and know how to support you whilst protecting you from your family. You could even get look up your college's confidentiality policy, they should have it online and it'd detail what they do with your information and if a student discloses any concerning information.

No. 1699478

>>>/g/348868
I made this post and I forgot how dead that board is. I’m really insecure about my glow up. And the older I get the more I hear from women both single ones and taken ones that they want to be modest and classy. Pls be kind to me. I’m not a victim but I need therapy and reassurance.

No. 1699522

>>1699428
With this realization, what are you doing with it? Are you going to work on how not to feel like you fit the points of a narcissist? I think it's a good initiation of being a narcissist or not is worrying and that feeling like you need to do something about it, or feeling you fit the points and go "that's just how my brain is wired and I can't do anything to fix it." Like really sit on it.

No. 1699534

>>1699522
You wrote this like someone trying really hard to turn a one sentence statement into an essay out of obligation

No. 1699545

I hate having ADHD i wish I could study like a normal person I feel like I have no choice but to be mediocre in everything I do

No. 1699594

My mom made a scene and had an outburst at me in a diner yesterday because I was tired and not talkative enough for her liking. She slammed her hands down in the middle of us eating and went "OK, LET'S GO THEN" extremely loudly and made me jump and when I asked why she was like "You clearly don't want to be here with me so why did you even come? You could at least try to act like you love me. All you're doing is sitting there acting weird (does hunched over mopey impression mocking me) and ripping at your food you are barely eating it or talking. (she was talking about was gossip about my aunt's coworker and I wasn't giving good enough responses I guess) at this point I am going oh fuck oh fuck mentally great I fucked up not acting whatever enough for my mom now the whole day with her is ruined unless I kiss her ass. I told her sorry I am still waking up trying to chug this diet coke for the caffeine sorry if I seem too blah and I told you when we came in here nothing really looked that good on the menu so I'm just picking at these onion rings I'm sorry, and she just stayed angry and stormed off to the bathroom and when we came back she wanted to immediately leave and in the car I went, well do you still want to do x and x we had planned and literally like a petulant little kid she pouted and was all "…. I guess so." I fucking hate when my mom gets like that, I honestly think she has bipolar disorder or something. She's a wicked freakish bitch and she wonders why I never tell her anything about my personal life. I'm struggling so hard with a ton of things right now but I have to put on a mask and act a certain way in front of my mom I literally can't just vibe for 5 minutes and pick at my onion rings because my mom is such a pathetic neurotic skank she needs constant positive feedback and becomes this evil, cold bitch to get me back into line. its freakish how she goes hot to cold so fast. Honestly her instincts are right. I don't fucking love her. I don't trust her and don't feel secure loving her because she's unsafe

No. 1699595

>>1699594
Hope you get to tell her how you really feel someday.

No. 1699602

>>1699594
this could be my mother and it’s fucking scary reading it from another persons perspective. mine is the exact same and i feel the exact same way about her. i think it’s narcissism nona - like straight up NPD - but mine has a close family history of bipolar so you might also be on the mark there. i hope you can get away from her and go low/no contact. i totally understand how horrible and stifling it is to be around these fucking miserable, awful women-children

No. 1699607

My friend keeps dating the worst men. Last night, I was hanging out with her. Her boyfriend was supposed to be out but ended up staying in. He was on the phone so I was browsing Tinder to show her the ugly men on the app. She just said don't show this to me. I asked why and she replied that her boyfriend doesn't want her to see photos of other men. He might think I am showing her potential matches. He doesn't speak our language so I just proceed to tell her that he's an asshole and that this is inaceptable and to leave him. She subtly kicked me out after. In a few months, I will for millionth time tell her I told you so when she finally leaves him.

No. 1699609

>>1699607
Why doesn't he speak your language? Is he like a refugee

No. 1699617

>>1699609
He's an immigrant. He's Turkish so he obviously has sexist/misogynistic views towards women.

No. 1699670

i met up for the first time with my internet best friend that ive known for almost 10 years and it was the most fun and beautiful experience ive ever had in life. it was the first time i didnt feel judged by someone im hanging out with, i could talk about anything i wanted with her and didnt feel judged and we had so much fun. at first i was afraid that me and her would be awkward with each other irl and we were a bit the first 2 days but not in a bad way, we were just super excited but we warmed up to each other super quickly and the rest of our meet up went so well. im so so happy to have 1 real friend that is so amazing in my life.

No. 1699690

Kek my boyfriend is all pissy slamming shit and sighing because he thought the dirty dishes I had loaded in the washer were clean (I pre rinse and scrub food off but it was obviously not clean) and he put them away and then realized halfway they were actually dirty and had to put them back. Like ok if you’re going to act like a bitch then just ask me to do the dishes so I don’t have to deal with your shitty attitude the rest of the day.

No. 1699700

>>1699607
Why even intervene? If she's into dating a sexist medieval asshole, let them have it.

No. 1699716

File: 1694884012014.jpg (39.17 KB, 563x562, Fu7Hdk2acAEEFP9.jpg)

Nonnas, I have something to confess to you guys. Things have been difficult and I have been unemployed for a little more than a year.
It's like no one is actively hiring and if there were jobs that fit my career path, they are always something wrong with it like a super long commute time, low salary, or just simply they just have high requirements that I can't meet…and the list goes on.
I feel like the biggest loser yet at 23 with no prospects, career, or future goals. I have been (embarrassingly and comfortably) living off my parents and thinking about a career switch after finishing my degree. I am at my wits end rn anons, I hate myself so much.

No. 1699719

>>1699716
Same but for longer, everyone is like don’t worry you’ll find something eventually but I also don’t want a shit low paying job overworking me that I hate. In order to stop me from actively killing myself I have to not think about it too deeply and act like I’ll get hired somewhere soon. If you want a career switch I’d recommend doing that especially since you’re living with parents and don’t have many expenses.

No. 1699723

>>1699716
Didn't you just waste a year you could've spend gaining experience for a better paid position?

No. 1699725

My absolutely retarded cow friend got convinced by her new psychologist to give her lying abusive controling ex another chance. I told her yesterday firmly it's a retarded idea and that she always has day when she can't see clearly how abusive he is. Bitch was supposed to have a talk with him about their relationship but she had lunch at his place, fell asleep and now they're watching the Simpsons…. no talk, no nothing, i'm so fucking angry with this cow. Her cat is waiting for her hungry in her new place she moved into three months ago to be free and she's fucking watching the Simpsons. I only care about her animal hoard at this point, i wish she could change but it's been 5 years of me trying to help her.
And siderant: Psychologists are fucking awful creatures! She had two and they gave her the absolute opposite advice she should get. Destructing her life just to be nice and polite to a psychopath who uses her as a maid.

No. 1699727

I fucking hate my job, 12 hours in this shithole is unbearable today

No. 1699731

>>1699725
if she's retarded then she's probably misrepresenting her situation to the psychs. it's common for domestic abuse victims to return to their abusers unfortunately. if the animal hoarding is severe call the cops or authorities on her.

No. 1699758

File: 1694888578899.jpg (21.75 KB, 200x200, 3c04069d2a12cbc5d7c86a5ee1349d…)

y'all i have the biggest incel fetish and when i tell you right now my dreams are coming TRUE. i found a moid who's
>5'8
>serbian
>neo-nazi
all he does is play map games, scroll through social media and argue on discord. i met him on /soc/ while pretending to be a guy. he genuinely believes he's going to kill all the jews and muslims one day. he is VISIBLY brown and already balding. i'm in fucking heaven. what are the chances that he's a virgin? there's no way he's not. i'm planning a trip to serbia atm. can't wait to make him renounce his entire belief system for the slightest chance of pussy. i'm going to save him. i'm going to save him and he's going to let me peg him EVERY night. pray for me girls

No. 1699759

>>1699758
>i'm going to save him
You figured out how to fix male baldness?

No. 1699761

My parents were extremely neglectful as I was growing up, and now that I've come back home to take care of them (they're sick, and need help maintaining the house), they always give me the shittiest advice known to man. It's so infuriating to receive nothing advice, because they have failed me so much. I dealt with anorexic as a child and they just let it happen. Looking back at the pictures of me when I was a kid, I looked so unhealthy and sickly. I can't believe they let me end up like that. Now, they tell me I'm eating too much when I'm at a healthy weight. I fucking hate them. If I had bad self-esteem, they could have broken me down. They have no self-awareness and take no responsibility for anything.

No. 1699771

>>1699758
>scroll through social media and argue on discord
that's just sad and retarded
>already balding
are you a hair transplant surgeon?

No. 1699773

>>1699758
i'm praying for you but not in the way you want us to

No. 1699786

I created a community for women to hang out online and despite everyone that I've met, I still feel incredibly lonely and misunderstood. I suppose it was my fault for trying to replicate finding the friend group I found a couple of years prior, it really was a once in a lifetime encounter. We've had some problems along the way but overall I don't regret creating it and the work I've put into it, I just wish things were different I guess. Maybe me being unable to be close to others is a personal problem, but I've had wonderful and deep connections before so it's hard to understand why I'm struggling so hard now. I don't even want to post in the friend finder thread again because I'm simply too exhausted. Comes with being an oldfag? Maybe.

No. 1699792

File: 1694891158177.png (235.78 KB, 368x469, cat.png)

>>1699758
nonna I've known several people with an "incel fetish" and they all really just had cripplingly low self esteem and internet poisoning kek. I promise you could get a sane, not balding moid who doesn't hate you if you wanted. That's what you deserve. Incels are literally the cesspit of the gene pool that should never reproduce, it's ultimately better for society if they goon in their parents' basements and die angry virgins

No. 1699796

>>1699758
why do you hate yourself so much

No. 1699798

>>1699758
You retards and your femdom/turning incels/pegging shit is beyond disgusting. Stay the fuck out of my country and stop giving attention to scrotes like that.

No. 1699800

>>1699798
it's much better than maledom at least

No. 1699801

>>1699800
Consider not touching them at all.

No. 1699802

>>1699801
that's the most based option but harm reduction for hopeless straighies is always through femdom

No. 1699809

File: 1694892338203.png (126.5 KB, 427x344, 1436767060742.png)

Looking through the liked posts of my TIM ex on twitter and the posts are nothing but other troons seething about "AFAB wombyns", girldick, how trans women are superior, and the occasional yuri art. I feel so disappointed and disgusted of myself. He's basically a stereotype of other transbian twitter troons now. I cannot believe I used to date this loser, Holy shit.

No. 1699816

>>1698997
update and a general thank you to the nonnas responding. i’m gonna do an update every few days for my own sanity.
side effects:
some calf weirdness, went away
neck weirdness, currently away
ear clogged? not sure
still very very scared and anxious, i don’t want to go blind.

No. 1699835

So stressed from clinicals that I've developed shingles. Lovely.

No. 1699860

File: 1694897037030.png (619.28 KB, 760x400, happy.png)

Being at home again is awful; my mom's style of living is wholly incompatible with how I want to live. I get tired of arguing with her, it makes me feel guilty and terrible after the fight is over, but it's either this or homelessness.

>Stop arguing with her


It's not that simple. She will grumble out loud for hours and hours over the tiniest, pettiest things while making snide remarks about me where it hurts the most – me taking six years for a four year degree (Covid fucked me hard), my suicide attempts, etc. – and I can't help but to blow up at her. It's just so bad for my mental health, and hers honestly. I love her but I really do need to get out of here. I wish someone would hire me. I'm waiting for a job to call me back and I'm praying that I get it, because this is not fucking working at all.

No. 1699867

>>1699860
Oh…and there's the issue of outside interference too. I'm in this weird period of my life where I'm relying on people way more than I thought I would be, at 24 (by this I mean, my distant uncle is kind enough to teach me how to drive, because I never bothered to learn until now – I initially left home at 17 and had lived in a big city with good PT for the past seven years and I miss it so fucking much – so now I usually spend a few days at his place so he doesn't have to drive back and forth between my mom's house and his). I truly thought I would be living on my own right now and not struggling through what feels like a particularly nasty adolescent phase. I really do despise this idea people have that I'm just lounging around and relaxing…I am not. I hate this. I just don't want to slave in a factory or do retail again, that's why I went to uni in the first place…to avoid that shit.

No. 1699872

>>1699725
Do you know what a lolcow is? What’s up with anons being hostile to victims of abuse so suddenly? Are you guys scrotes or is this a zoomer trend I missed out on because of the le negativity vibes is bad meme

No. 1699875

I am too ashamed to go to the pool with my friends because I don't know how to swim.

No. 1699876

>>1699872
Don't forget op may as well be deranged herself this site attracts that type

No. 1699884

>>1699860
I hope you get out soon. It's so stressful to go back to your parents after you leave. You realize all the things they do that drive you crazy. Sending positive vibes

No. 1699924

Does anybody else feel like it's impossible to form genuine friendships past the age of 25 or so? I don't know if I am just too dead inside or if all of us are or if I simply disconnected from people too much within the last 10 years. I remember how some friendships have saved my soul and motivated me like hell but now at best I find someone to "talk to" and the dialogues are always superficial.

Maybe it's just because I cannot find anybody I genuinely share an interest with. Maybe I am too childish or maybe the overabundance of content and possibilities has made people drift apart. Even when I join fandoms online I cannot really connect since people always prefer different characters, different things about a story, different pairings and different headcanons.

>>1698876
For me it was easy because they don't even get as far. The only thing I managed to teach my mother is how to use What's App and a news app and she's happy with this. My father once tried but never got far with PCs. He was the typical dad you see 4channers parodying that shouted "NOOONNNNNA I THINK YOUR GAME IS SLOWING MY PC DOWN" even though it was just installed, not even running kek

Tbh I don't use phones much so I sadly cannot help. For PCs having an adblocker alone is already preventing most issues but phones mainly work with apps, not browsers.

No. 1699926

>>1699924
Sometimes has gone down in the last 5 years. It feels harder to make friends. I am over 35 though and i just couldnt make a single friend after 30. It's so difficult. No one wants to connect anymore, even though I have IG and discord. it felts so forced, or I will speak to someone for a week before they ghost me..

No. 1699929

>>1699924
COVID ruined social skills for most people tbh and cancel culture made everyone feel like they have to walk on eggshells

No. 1699930

i never told anyone that i was sa'd by my fellow neighborhood kids and i sometimes forget that a large reason for me being this fucked up is because it happened. i don't even know how i'd bring it up kek. everyone would think i was lying and just trying to excuse my bad behavior. and telling wouldn't change anything because i barely remember their names and faces but i just find myself sweating and feeling ill around certain subjects….anyway i do need to be kind to myself kek

No. 1699944

>>1698895
I mainly see this coming from certain types of US-American people on tumblr and twitter. Basically every place that isn't the US and maybe some central and northern Euro countries (aka GER, ITA and FR + Scandinavia) is a crime-ridden hellhole and borderline medieval. Croatia seems modern and incredibly pretty to me (good cuisine too) and correct me if I am wrong since I am not Croatian, but the negative parts aren't crime related (at least do I doubt that it has more crime than other modern places) but that many barely make enough money to live and bad job perspectives in some regions, which is why many are immigrating.

Serbia is even more extreme in that regard, but it's still a super nice place to visit with friendly people and unlike my own fucking country (Germany) they have super fast w-lan in every bus I used, every tram and every restaurant. Same with Romania. I was residing in a very rural area near the Bulgarian/Romanian borders for a few weeks last month. When I went to Naples once I also chose the Spanish Quarters, a place tourist guide warn about. And again super nice people, easy to make friendships (well if you speak Italian at least) and random strangers will help you instead of ignoring you (unlike where I live). I explored the quarter at night to find its hidden churches, their fancy Maradona graffitis (don't ask) and the private holy corners with Virgin Mary and offerings + photos of dead family members.

The quarter warnings were either based on problems from the past that are long since solved or they are simply prejudices. I myself live in a city of which the name alone is making other people cringe and even here I can walk around peacefully at night (thought mostly without w-lan access). And I am pretty sure that neither Croatian towns (especially not the tourists places) nor most of the other Euro cities are as bad as my city and its weed-fog and arrogant bankers, aggressive geese and rich fags.

No. 1699949

>>1699924
Yes, I don't think people want to talk to each other anymore. They want someone to talk AT, not talk to. You'll find this is true if you look at any Discord server where people talk over each other and have no interest in what anyone is saying or tries to carry a conversation. I'm also guilty of peacing out of conversations early but at least I try to engage instead of immediately changing the subject. I've given up hope that I'll ever connect deeply with someone again and just enjoy the superficial friendships I have, they're lovely but I still feel lonely.

No. 1699953

>>1699929
In a way it makes me feel better because I was rather isolated all my life, felt like an alien and everybody was angry at me for being awkward but one year of less social contacts and even the geniuses of socialization act like autists. Still a bit mad though because they are getting pitied for it but I only got shat on which drove me to further isolation.

That said, the disconnection the other anons mentioned isn't covid related or at least not caused by it IMO since it happened to me too way before this. You are probably right with the eggshell part. This and the social standards that dictate that adults need to act adult, the laughing at people with unrealistic dreams, the irony culture and adults generally being more jaded and suspicious has killed friendships.
How many times have I been enthusiastic about a thing only to get a bored "hm" from others? Or realised they didn't listen. If you genuinely like a story and say so people will call you stupid, if you have fun speculating about aliens or futuristic cities people will call you dumb even if it's just a thought experiment. People all monetize their hobbies, making them less hobbylike and them more likely to consider others as rivals instead of fellow fans of the same thing.
>>1699949
This. They talk and talk and you never say anything. Once they are done they go. They never listen, they interrupt and if you tell them about problems you have they don't care, usually they don't even reply, make fun of it or try to outpity you by telling their own stories. I had a friend like this. Few years ago I made a test. Whether she would notice that I didn't say a single sentence the whole day. She didn't. 7h-8h hours together, grilling at least, but no dialogue. I was so disappointed. She even repeated some long stories multiple times to have something to talk about but didn't care I didn't say shit.

Maybe it's socmedia. Unironically. Socmedia are platforms for people to present themselves and make posts for an audience. I dunno.

No. 1699955

>>1699924
I feel the same. I've got no idea how to make friends now, trying to go to public and community events and hobby groups hasn't really been very fruitful. I'll keep going otherwise i'd never leave my house for anything but work and school, but I've been SO lonely.

No. 1699964

File: 1694906397137.gif (1.14 MB, 220x220, Tumblr_l_542111183316220.gif)

It's 1.20am and the neighbour's dog has been barking NON STOP FOR MORE THAN ONE HOUR STRAIGHT. I just want to fucking go to sleep.

No. 1699995

>>1699924
I’m so lonely too and online friends just don’t cut it. I was the only one suggesting doing anything in my friend group and now that I’m not we don’t see each other for weeks. I don’t have an SO or any immediate family so I’m just extremely lonely. I want to take classes but I’m nervous and I’m not that great at mingling in short bursts. The only reason I have some long term friends is because I met them in college and had months of consistent contact to get to know them. I don’t know how to make long term friends without a msssive vetting process . I really want to go back to graduate school but I’m not in debt from my Bachelor’s and don’t really want to ruin that for another Art Degree…

No. 1699996

Cut myself after being self harm free for 7 years. Freaked out a bit since I cut into softer skin and didn’t expect to be that deep. I’m getting too old to be this fucking dumb

No. 1699997

>>1699875
nona u dont need to know how to swim, go in to the shallow end and just sunbake and chill. i’m not confident in water either (body image too) but there are ways to navigate that i promise

No. 1699998

>>1699758
get a life

No. 1699999

>>1699758
are you fucking 15?

No. 1700000

File: 1694910228670.jpg (77.61 KB, 1024x988, 1689724368390303.jpg)


No. 1700001

>>1699758
i hate women like you because youre just sad and pathetic and too insecure to get a better man so thats why you go for incels

No. 1700004

>>1699758
you're annoying and not funny hope this helps

No. 1700005

>samefagging as idiots who take the bait when the bait is that obvious
ok calm down

No. 1700016

I wish I grew up with money.
Nothing fucks with you mentally more than finding roaches in your food as a child.
I couldn't even eat the cereal my mother got from food banks with milk. We ate it with water mixed with chocolate powder.
Even to this day I cannot open cabinets without the slight suspicion that some fucking thing will fall out of it.
Looking back, I can't believe I grew up with a black and white television as the only way to watch shit and never once questioned it. It's so bizarre.

No. 1700020

>>1699798
Don't bring femdom into this.

No. 1700039

>>1700005
Ngl I fall for bait sometimes too but this one was so painfully obvious kek

No. 1700047

>>1700016
I feel you on that one. I have become better at cleaning and fixing up messes. I lived in a good apartment but had dirty neighbors. Now that I live with my wife and our neighbors arent too bad, I just keep my house extra clean. I understand that fear so vividly however

No. 1700072

>>1700016
My parents have had pantry moth infestations and mice in their house so I kinda relate. I remember opening a box to a blender because I wanted to make a smoothie and it was full of pantry moth larvae. And boiling water in the tea kettle and dead bugs getting poured into my mug.

No. 1700074

I feel like an outcast everywhere I go. I even feel weird posting this. I just want to be happy.

No. 1700077

Something very common these days that reaaally annoys me is when idiots only read the first few words of your post and make the rest up and get mad at message in their head.
It happens like once a day nowadays that someone gets mad at me for the exact opposite of what I said. Like when I post "I didn't like the trailer of this so I expected nothing good, but the story was actually great" and a tard only reads the first part and gets mad at me for hating.
Of course nobody can ever admit mistakes on this shitty internet either, so pointing their mistake out will trigger war and ad hominems. Fucking mentally ills man, how hard is it to read two full sentences before raging?

No. 1700084

>>1700004
Nta, but I thought it was funny…

No. 1700085

This is minor but for a law course I'm going through a case from the 90s that dealt with violent/degrading porn and it's frustrating to see how much we've regressed in just a few decades. The judgement spoke so clearly about how porn is misogynistic and dehumanizing, that it creates real risks of harm to women, affects the way men think about women, and that it's not possible to reconcile porn with gender equality. Nowadays the sort of porn that was covered in the case wouldn't even be considered extreme. I'm somewhat dreading going over it in class because I know my moid classmates (who very likely watch worse stuff on a daily basis) are going to jump to defend it.

No. 1700104

I want my old life back. I might never be the same again and that sucks. I fucked myself over and I didn't even know it until it was too late. At least I didn't cry today. Today is the first day in weeks I was able to make it without crying, though I got close a couple of times.

No. 1700136

>>1700074
I feel the same. At work, when I went to school, being in a grocery isle, online communities, hell even here barely anyone responds to me. Never had infighting but its like I'm just weird enough to stand out irl and maybe too mundane for other LC users.

No. 1700137

>>1700074
nona me too. i’m always second guessing myself no matter who im with, even with family and my closest friends i’m still unable to tell if i’m welcome

No. 1700145

>>1700077
I noticed this too, I think it's fried attention span and/or cocomelon brainrot.

No. 1700188

File: 1694936581135.jpg (79.92 KB, 825x900, 349128535_1267782620516611_864…)

i'm going monk mode (isolating myself) again. everybody minimizes my problems or interrupts to talk about how much worse theirs are. i just want some fucking reassurance and encouragement to help myself.
>joints in back hurt from work
>tell mother, she says "uhm it's just your posture, pay attention to that and it should be fine"
>i work for 9 hours and it's impossible to avoid it as i'm moving shit around
>tell guy i'm dating, he says "i started drinking because of my back pain…"
>tell another guy i'm dating, he says "how can that job be so bad? you know what i'm lifting everyday?!" as if men and women are the same…
>tell my brother and father, they don't react or say some generic shit like "that's life"
really, i'm not even 30 and already have back pain. the most concerned person was my manager because they were afraid i would sue the company for injury. i did not go to the doctor yet because i am afraid they will tell me it's something awful. i am scared to go alone or even make an appointment because everyone in my life is minimizing this or doesn't have problems like this at all because they sit down and edit pictures of coffee. i am so alone i might as well stay alone and not listen to any of their bullshit. i don't want to meet anyone for at least a month. if i get crippled in my 30s it is my body that will hurt not theirs.

No. 1700191

>>1700188
>everyone in my life is minimizing this or doesn't have problems like this at all because they sit down and edit pictures of coffee
What

No. 1700193

>>1700191
Isn’t it your bedtime, Eurofag?

No. 1700194

>>1700193
It's mid morning in most of europe

No. 1700199

>>1700188
Anon you only stand to gain from going to the doctor whether it's something serious or not. For all you know your doctor tells you to do some stretches or core-strengenting excersises to go through life pain-free again, wouldn't that be great? Go.

No. 1700201

>>1700191
that's a job

No. 1700206

File: 1694939565456.jpg (167.77 KB, 1170x637, 51bfe7c377b5c40e7602385e5c7b2e…)

>>1700199
thanks anon. i might go but i would rather switch jobs or be broke. i am constantly tired and barely save anything anyway from being too tired to cook. friends encourage my overspending on takeout and drinks. family holds me back from quitting this backbreaking place. i am not even going to the gym anymore i am so tired. thanks again.

No. 1700226

People never include me in anything. Not my best friend. Not my boyfriend. Not even my family.
I’m always the one making plans and searching people to meet me. And I know some people would tell me that I need to grow a spine and just talk about it but I feel like if it changes, it wouldn’t be because someone changed their mind. It would be because I asked it. And that’s what’s hurting me. The feeling of being replaceable. Not being enough for them. Thinking that I’m boring or a nuisance. That no one thinks of me like a priority.

No. 1700231

I wish I was someone's first choice for a change, seems like I'm never good or fun enough no matter how I try to improve myself.

No. 1700237

I'm at my limit, I'm so tired it's starting to sting in my head. I just want a goddamn vacation away from life.

No. 1700243

Reee I have small chest and small tits and I can make my stomach flat with excercises but my ass is always big and I hate it, I just wish I was more proportional. Either give me a smaller ass or a bigger chest. I can't make my hips smaller, it's just how my bones are. My small tits look just weird when compared to my ass

No. 1700250

>>1700243
If it makes you feel better that's the exact body type I like.

No. 1700255

>>1700231
Nonny, contorting yourself into something x person likes is never going to make them love and respect you. At worst they will think you're pathetic and desperate, at best you'll be frustrated and start to resent them.

What unironically worked for me is unapologetically being a walking hot mess of a person. I really have it all: twice divorced, childhood trauma from living in a third world shithole and have mommy issues, was bullied at school, unemployed, can't dress myself, ADHD. At some point I just got tired of it all and decided to live for myself. I made peace with dying alone and being single and friendless for life because I'm hard to "get". Somehow I landed a great bf who didn't care about any of these things, he genuinely loves me for me. Once I was free of fucks to give, friends started coming too. Just embrace your goblinsona and be free.

No. 1700264

>>1700250
Yes it makes me feel better. Now where can I find women like this

No. 1700285

I hate that my alcoholic dad and the abuse he’s put me through makes me feel like total shit when I go to parties on his side of the family. Since I don’t have many good memories with my cousins (they disliked me because I was the youngest) and I wasn’t as close to my grandparents compared to them I feel excluded from how much they all obsess over family and their close relationships. My dad would give my male cousins nice gifts or praise them while spitting on my face and calling me a miserable cunt/stupid bitch etc, and currently doesn’t even going to events for his own grandkids (my sister’s, I’m CF). We’re all adults now and I just feel so much anger and sadness over how my dad treated us growing up and that no one in the family ever confronted him for his behavior or tried to help me or my mom and sister. They would probably think I’m crazy or attention starved if I confronted anyone about it. My life outside of this family is totally fine but the whiplash between having a great job/school life and coming back to my dad and his nightmare shit is boggling.

No. 1700295

Heels are so pretty but so back-destroying

No. 1700298

>>1700255
Sorry anon I wasn't really talking about being a guy's first choice but more so about friends. It just seems that despite how I've overcome severe social anxiety and how my social skills now blend in with everyone else's through hard work, no matter how fun, sociable and sponaneous I've become and how I now have people around me with whom I hang out with, I'm still not anyone's first choice to hang out with or whatever when it really comes to it. I feel like just kinda "there" in my social circles, fun enough to be around but not really that important to anyone. I guess I want to actually matter to someone.

Thanks for sharing your story though, I'm glad for you and I hope it'll work out for me somehow too but that seems to be too good to happen to me. idk.

No. 1700301

It's so hard to find good average weight/size fashion inspo, mostly because fat girls think they're "mid size" because they're not morbidly obese, when they're just basic fat and sometimes even actually obese (people don't know what obesity looks like a lot of the time, it starts a lot "smaller" than what people think because they're so used to 400 pound tv shows)

No. 1700307

File: 1694954520803.jpg (13.89 KB, 266x130, 1654734262058.jpg)

people trying to make me feel bad for rejecting a hairy ape-like spanish guy who smells bad and is ugly and doesn't have his shit together, just because he's such a nice guy. They have the guts to tell me that they think I'm attractive. Why do you want me to sleep with a monkey then? Honestly I feel disgusted just being next to him, but the thought that there are people who would see us together makes me feel even worse. I don't think of myself as beautiful but I'm definitely not on his level, I'm slim, I have blone hair, blue eyes, full lips and nice skin and my face is quite proportional and neotenous, I fit the standards of a conventionally attractive white female. Sure I'm not a stacy but I'm not ugly. My self esteem has always been pretty low because of my traumatic childhood and I have no ability to defend myself, so instead of facing them directly I can only ghost people who try to take adventage of me, and they try to do it probably because I seem childish. But this, this makes me feel so fucking low and ugly. It makes me biblically angry. You really want me to fuck a hairy, smelly ape. What did I do to deserve this?

No. 1700308

>>1700307
sharty not exciting enough today?

No. 1700310


No. 1700311

>>1700310
I thought you were a soyteen but now I think you might just be on too much cocomelon

No. 1700313

i wish i could allow myself to grieve without feeling guilty about it, especially over a dog. i've had family members and other pets pass away, but she was my soul dog, and we grew up together. she got to see me in my first home, i shaped a lot of my life choices around her, and now she's gone. i wish i knew she wasn't coming back home when i took her in, but i don't know if that would have prepared me more

No. 1700314

Are all men this egocentric when it comes to food? I was travelling and I expected to arrive home around noon so I asked my boyfriend if we had any leftovers that I could have when I arrive. He said that he was planning to eat all of that. Then I asked him if he could prepare something for me but he said he'd rather order something. I assumed he meant that he'd pay for it, but then I immediately see I on my banking app that he charged me for it.

I don't know if I'm a drama queen or if I have the right to feel upset about this, but I felt so angry. He earns twice as much as I do, doesn't cook, whereas I do the cooking for both of us on a regular basis. We started ordering groceries because he felt that it was such a hassle to carry everything home but with the delivery prices, I cannot really afford it anymore and I'm sure that I will be the one carrying everything because he finds it 'stupid' to be carrying something that he could easily order for 'a small fee'. Sometimes I feel like he doesn't really think of 'us' really, he thinks more like we're just two people living together, if that makes sense

No. 1700323

>>1700313
I'm so sorry anon. My fourteen year old husky mix, who I had since I was eight, passed some years ago and it was easily one of the most (if not the most) painful shit ice ever experienced. It's fucking torture. Do you want to share any memory of you two? What was puppy's name? I'm listening.

No. 1700325

>>1700311
I don't know what you mean but ok

No. 1700326

>>1700325
nona is saying you speak like a retard

No. 1700327

>>1700326
Why? Did the mention of spanish heritage offended someone?

No. 1700330

Sometimes it feels like a lot of nonnies hypersexualise media even worse than most moids do, in pure fears of moids doing it first, and end up hating something/someone over something that might not actually not been meant as a big deal or just a bypassing joke.
I was the same in my early teens when guys around me started sexualizing things I like so I started fine combing every type of media I enjoyed "just in case", but once I realized that it was only doing damage to me and that the guys didn't really pick up on most of the things I had taken note of myself (they also quickly stopped with the sexual jokes and references, probably because they got told off by other women around them) I got over it. So I get it, I totally get it, it becomes a defense mechanism. But acting overly puritan because terminally online moids that would sexualize literally anything anyway is just going to cause you unnecessary amounts of stress.

No. 1700331

>>1700307
You shouldn’t feel bad, all men are trash in particular ways, for example, Spanish men are angry 24/7 and they commit a bunch of femicides daily.

No. 1700349

Nonnas I need some reassurance if I made the right decision or not. I just got back from the worst travel experience ever with someone I thought was my friend. We’re former coworkers.
The food were I traveled is very expensive and there’s scams going on at restaurants where they don’t give you the menu, and you order food and they hike up the price. The woman I went with had been there multiple times and is native to the country. She blatantly let me get scammed because I was the one paying because she “didn’t have enough money”. I carefully budgeted for this trip and she boasted about her wanting to spend money because she loves the country. I paid for all the expensive dinners because she wanted to eat all the expensive meals. She’s 20 years older than me too and the waiter would look at us weird when I brought out my credit card because they thought she was my guardian.

The whole trip she would complain about migraines and period pains and I was very understanding. I noticed towards the end she would use that as a way to order more food like “I’m hungry I feel better after eating” and I would be a human about it and agree to it. She would literally make comments about my body and compare it with her daughter. She obsessed over my new Birkenstock shoes and how expensive they are and that she’s going to buy them for her daughter but the “better ones”. The energy was so off the whole time and people were looking at us weird because she would complain so loud… the hotel we stayed at offered free bikes and she refused even when I wanted to. Instead we walked in the blistering heat to the beach which was far away while all the other tourists used their bikes, all while listening to her complain. I wanted to get ice cream and she would literally say “don’t you want to lose weight?”. She wanted to take pictures with my phone (I got a newer iPhone ) and she would never take pics of me if I didn’t ask her multiple times. She was literally on her phone 95% of the time.
We got back yesterday and she texted me today “hey how are you” and I blocked her number. This trip is easily the biggest mistake I’ve ever done in my life. Wasted so much money for nothing. I feel mentally drained and I feel like if I went by myself I would’ve enjoyed the trip a lot more. I feel so regretful and sad but it felt so good coming home to my apartment, I celebrated with frozen pizza and felt so peaceful in my bed. We shared beds at the hotel and she booked it without asking me first. I feel like I survived the biggest narc psycho ever.

No. 1700352

I have an acquaintance and she's such a pickme. She's never done anything to me personally but I can't help but judge her for her degenerate ways, she's a very public BDSMfag, awful lip injections that make her look like a trout, shit edgy tattoos of headless women and women tied up, tranny worshipper etc all the libfem bingo points. Her boyfriend makes me feel sick, he's also a bdsmfag and he looks exactly like the sort of narcissistic abusive moid that would be into bdsm, I literally hate him, and I hate her for enabling him, he should be locked up for being an abusive freak. What's also annoying is everyone worships her for being so 'progressive' and 'liberated', libfems are a curse. I hate how they act like you're the weirdo if you don't get caned in a room full of strangers and date someone who doesn't want to strangle you during sex.

No. 1700355

>>1700349
She sounds awful, good riddance. You don't need to keep people around who have no respect for you. Hope you have a better travelling experience soon!

No. 1700356

>>1700349
Sometimes being alone is better than with company

No. 1700360

Hi nonnies, i live with my abusive mom and i was really hoping to increase my income this year but it's gotten really low (i work freelance so my pay is super variable) and i feel so frustrated and sad. This is always looming over me and it's so hard and i feel like an idiot for not being able to put myself in a better position right now

No. 1700362

>>1700355
Thanks. I forgot to add she would walk two steps in front of me which I found very weird. Sometimes the pavement was narrow and people would want to walk past us and on the rare occasion I was walking ahead she would always cut me off and walk in front like it was insane. Shit was wild. I’m happy I’m home safe.

No. 1700371

>>1700349
I remember your post about her booking a hotel room with one bed without asking you first. Glad youve finally got away from that narc.

No. 1700374

My parents left for the day and my sister started throwing violent temper tantrums and I'm scared.

No. 1700381

>>1700085
What is the case? I get also depressed when I'm reminded how degenerate and regressive society (especially men) have become. I remember growing up in the 2000s how common it is for even the most libfem women to hate on porn, how it's objectifying, and hate on the men who watch it. Now it's just expected to be cool with your bf watching it. Something happened in the 2010s with the sexpozzie shit. Everything is so fucked. I hope you can shut down the moid students in your class.

No. 1700396

>>1700352
This is confusing. I thought that lib-fem stands for liberal feminist, but how can she be a feminist is she's also a pickme? Something isn't adding up.

No. 1700407

Went back to a thread to look at the great advice I gave (to admire how great it was) and I learned that some anon decided to reply to the anon I helped who raved about my great advice to give her "BETTER" advice. She drew up an example of what she was talking about and it looked nothing like what the anon wanted to achieve. What a fucking retard. The anon asking for help already told me how much she appreciated my advice, fuck are you doing giving her worse advice? Are you stupid? Nobody even responded to her which made me LOL. I hope she knows nobody responded because it was shit advice. I hope she feels bad.

No. 1700408

>>1700396
Liberal feminism is pickme propaganda.

No. 1700413

>>1700407
Jesus Anon, how narcissistic.

No. 1700420

>>1700188
Sadly back pain is more common than you think even in people under 30. I'm sorry everyone hasn't been sympathetic to you though, it's horrible having to live with pain, especially if it's something you're not used to. Your job isn't worth your health, maybe think about getting a new job that doesn't require you to strain yourself so much. Go to the doctor if you think it'll give you a peace of mind. Good luck anon and I hope your pain gets better. It's common for everyone to be unsympathetic until they go through it themselves but you never expect it from your loved ones. That shit hurts.

No. 1700423

If someone had told me a year ago that I would still be stuck here, unemployed and broke, I would probably have killed myself. I was so ready for a change and I've tried so hard to make changes for a whole year. I got a job in January that seemed super promising, and then due to some financial issues my whole team was fired just three months into the job. My only reason for not going insane is that I keep daydreaming and hoping that tomorrow is the day. Tomorrow is when I will get a call or an e-mail asking me to an interview. Tomorrow is the day one of the 200+ applications I've sent will give me a chance to make a change again. Each evening I end up crying because yet another day went by with no response. I can't stand this any longer. To think that I might still be here one year from now on is so awful I just want to die. I hate that I have to take each rejection with a smile and just move on, instead of hunting down whichever fuck decided not to give me a chance despite my perfect qualifications and throw them off a cliff.

No. 1700427

>>1700408
How?
And isn't all feminism liberal?

No. 1700446

I'm so fed up with this 'friend' I have. She's always so rude to me when we hang out and I feel like there's too much to explain in a single post but essentially
Her, her boyfriend and my room mate are friends, my room mate worked with her bf and i met her through work so we all know each other. They're older than both of us and we're in our mid 20s. Since I've met her she's always been a sperg and will die on any hill she sets foot on. I'm quite passive and agreeable which I hate and it's kind of what kept us hanging out so whenever she was mean to me I'd just take it.

Tonight she invited myself and my room mate out and I brought my bf out who just moved here after a year of long distance. She'd never met him and her bf and mine got along really well. He's lovely, they had a lot of common interests, I was so glad she was in a good mood and the night was going well. Then at one point we're at their place (me, my bf, her bf, my room mate) and as I was chatting to her bf and she was chatting to mine she leans over to her bf and nudges him to fill up her glass without saying anything. He asked what she wanted and she said the conversation she was having with my bf was boring (within his ear shot) and wanted a refill on her wine. Both her bf and I were kind of shocked at it and he just topped her up. My bf looked so hurt and I just didn't know what to say.

When we had a moment alone I apologised. I prepared him for her so he wasnt too annoyed by it but I still think it was quite mean.
The cherry on the cake though was toward the end of the night when her bf and I were having a conversation that the whole table was listening to, and in her drunken state she turns to me and says "(nonnie) can you shut up?"

That….. really pissed me off. I talked back to her and asked why, that I was just having a conversation, that what she's doing is rude. But she was drunk and she didn't care, and was being really sassy with all her responses. This feels like the end of the line for me, but with how tied in my social circles are (and given her bf is offering my bf a job) I just feel like I can't break out of it.

After we left both my room mate and bf commented how awful she was to me. rm has seen it before and hates how she treats me and has stood up for me before, and she diffused the situation tonight. Bf didn't want to intrude because he didn't really know either of them. But I'm at a loss. I don't want to be her friend. I never message her and according to her bf she considers me her CLOSEST friend. But she treats me like shit and palms it off as a joke when it's clearly not. She tells me it's autism but I'm autistic and I never speak to my close friends the way she speaks to me. I genuinely don't know what to do here, I feel like this would be a big bridge to burn given her bf is best friends with my best friend, he's wanting a friendship and offering employment to my bf, and I get along with her bf well.

I hate caping for moids but I feel he needs to leave her and stop apologising for her behaviour. But they've been together for so long its not ending any time soon.

Idk where to end this rant but I've just come home frustrated and needing to get out how done I am. But I'm stuck, and too much of a door matt to really do anything about it.

No. 1700451

File: 1694968571213.jpg (1.6 MB, 3543x1993, 1660200169986047.jpg)

I've been applying for McDonalds jobs all day and none of them have responded with a follow-up email for an interview

No. 1700454

>>1700427
NTAYRT but liberal feminism is “you’re free to do whatever you want, if wearing heels, posting ass everywhere and shaving makes you feel liberated and empowered then it’s all fine” which is bs because it’s not liberating women as a class. Actual feminism should have women questioning why they feel the need to wear heels, makeup and post ass everywhere when men don’t have to. Lots of things that liberal feminism post as “empowering” are things men (the ones in power) don’t do, but actually would be infinitely humiliated to do.

No. 1700461

I hate it when my husband gives me the illusion of choice when anything I say doesn't actually matter because he's already made up his mind. So why the fuck ask me at all? It makes me feel like shit.

No. 1700506

File: 1694977276255.jpg (255.77 KB, 2048x750, ff2231e7238811893905dda206f646…)

The current World Memory Champion is a mongolian girl, but they just had to put these noname scrotes in the middle of the photo and make them larger.

No. 1700509

Fuck

No. 1700517

File: 1694979523992.png (18.51 KB, 587x175, 00nk.png)

it kind of bothers me when people talk badly about GFE asmr youtubers and vtubers. you see, i'm a GFE tuber, and i've received multiple messages from viewers telling me i'm the one thing preventing them from committing suicide. one of my subs is unable to get a girlfriend because he is poor, lives at home and is always caring for his sick father. my streams help him get through the days. i honestly do feel like i'm doing an important service to the world, stereotypes be damned. i bet i'm even preventing mass shootings.

No. 1700519

File: 1694979984196.jpeg (36.79 KB, 600x573, EeZA3pBWkAAIW48.jpeg)

My thighs are getting fatter…But Mcdonalds is so tasty…Why Mcdonalds so tasty why

No. 1700520

>>1700451
>>1700519
are these like, anti-mcdonald's ads

No. 1700521

I was about to pass a man who looked visibly drunk, or something, and once I passed him he made a sexual comment towards me, kinda quietly, but I hear him very clearly. I completely lost my cool I started shouting at him, and then he tried to turn it around on me, asking me if I am mentally unstable and in hysterics. Nonnies, I am so fucking angry right now. Can someone explain why I am not allowed to carry pepper-spray? So fuckers like him can feel safe? What about me feeling safe when I was groped at 13 or harassed on the street so many times? Am I allowed to feel safe? What about all the other girls and women who dare to walk alone. Funny thing is I wasn't even alone when the first few incidents happened. I am wearing an oversized t-shit and loose, couple size bigger pants so I don't want to hear it. I was having such a good day too, and while I was out walking my phone died so I couldn't listen to music anymore, if only it didn't die, I wouldn't have heard him and I would be just as happy and content as I was just an hour ago. If there's a heaven, it will wait for me will all weapons of choice, and free range on all men that ever wronged me.

No. 1700523

>>1700521
carry it anyway and buy a taser if it’s illegal. if you can’t carry outright pepper spray then get bear mace. i hope not but in the event that something DOES happen the cops aren’t going to scare that you pepper sprayed someone since it’s self defense

No. 1700524

even though my therapist helped a lot with my agoraphobia, i still get angry when i think of how i vented to her about how i hate pedophiles and she went on the defensive and attacked me instead. she took a dig at me for 'mistreating' my mom (i do hate her, because her boyfriend attacked me and she took his side). i insult her, but i've never laid a hand on her and i take care of her disabled ass when she doesn't deserve it. how is what i'm doing equal to degenerate men who prey on women?

No. 1700526

>>1700524
>how i hate pedophiles and she went on the defensive and attacked me instead.
What the fuck? Why are therapists like this.

No. 1700527

File: 1694981290694.jpg (72.75 KB, 720x794, 363421351_268885315837683_3182…)

>>1700519
pic unrelated. i had to report a scrote on tinder for being an abuser. this retard tries to scam people online and get girls pimped out with his friend from jail. they use a fake contract for a room, then when you are there they ask for deposit and first week's rent. after that the guy will imply creepy things and tell you to smell a towel behind you, to show that his laundry detergent is very nice and you could use it. i swear the scam must only work on really stupid people but they still don't deserve it. i pretended to smell it, then he went out of the room and came back with his t-shirt off telling me i should work if i want this house. i was legitimately confused because i had already told them i had a job. then he said, but your friend (first guy) doesn't, so you have to work for him. i said then he should look for a job as well. then the guy saw i was not complying and had my phone so he was scared and let me go. the guy i reported was looking for sympathy in a flatting group, saying how his mental issues and disability make it difficult for him to find a flat, and i sympathised and offered my help. he wanted to flat with me. later he messaged me that he found a place, and sent pictures and videos of it. i was encouraged to check it out. the guy there was saying things too good to be true, and i was just thinking about an excuse. this was that place. later on le disabled guy is threatening me with violence for lying and calling me lazy for not wanting to work, and seeking pity for how he is always so alone and nobody wants to work with him, and we could be rich. disgusting and terrifying. i am still in the process of reporting to the police.

No. 1700528

me when i have to cope with being possibly disabled from cipro just so i don’t go septic and die of kidney infection lol so fun absolutely fuck the hospital for not giving me a choice

No. 1700531

It's my birthday today and my life is spiralling out of control. I don't think I've ever felt this depressed on my birthday.
A few months ago things were looking so bright, everything seemed too good to be true and now it's all falling apart.
There is zero emotion left in me. But I need to put on a smile. It is so tiring, nonnies…

No. 1700533

>>1700524
your therapist is retarded. finding a good one is a pain, if she is helping with your agoraphobia get what you can out of it but be wary about talking about your relationship with your mom and her boyfriend if she sympathizes with abusers.

No. 1700535

>>1700527
all this effort these scrotes could put towards gainful employment instead spent on trying to exploit women. hope the cops are useful and don't brush you off.

No. 1700545

I hate texas so fucking much. everyone here is fat and retarded and there is nothing to do unless you're willing to pay insane prices for nightclubs/concerts/sportball games. the few pathetic little parks that exist are full of criminals and litter. the weather sucks all the time and there is zero natural beauty anywhere. every stand of trees is used as a dump by some worthless redneck family, the waterways are choked with filth, there is ALWAYS a chemical plant on fire somewhere, random shootings are so common that no one even pretends to care anymore. little kids get shot playing in their own yards on a weekly basis and the cops never do anything about it because they're high or drunk all the time. on top of everything, people get OFFENDED if i say i don't like it here and am saving up to leave. like, they'll go from "if you don't like it, get the hell out" to "how dare you" when i say "yes, leaving is the plan, i'm working very hard at doing that." i've never met such retarded people in all my life.

No. 1700548

File: 1694983585962.gif (80.98 KB, 182x249, 1680133630122767.gif)

i need money badly…being poor is absolute hell and i hate the rat race but i want to run it so i can get some cash coming in

No. 1700549

>>1700524
a lot of therapists are terrible, feel free to dump her and find a new one. It's normal to shop around for one before you find someone that clicks right

No. 1700552

I ate a lot of oatmeal today, hoping I finally poopoo.

No. 1700562

>>1700535
thanks. they're fucking gross. all men benefit from keeping women down, whether disabled, gay, or ill. this guy spends half of his disability check on alcohol and however else he gets money is spent on decorations and bodymods. anything else he owns he picks at and destroys. i really am trying to avoid him as much as possible but without freaking him out. i am scared he will tard rage if i suddenly block and ghost him. unfortunately he knows where i live and where i work.

No. 1700584

>>1700545
hi fellow texas anon, our state sucks kek. The only thing I like about living here is the nature. I have a lot of fond memories of camping in Big Bend and the lakes area around Austin (although you have to go really far out to get away from all the people). I haven't decided whether I'm moving out of texas or buying a ton of land in bumfuck nowhere and living like a hermit but I can't stand the people and "culture" here anymore

No. 1700586

I saw a video from a woman who makes mandala artwork saying goodbye to her channel viewers and subscribers because she has little time left due to cancer, and it made me tear up. Cancer and all of these diseases really are not fair.

No. 1700608

Why is the asian beauty standard super skinny it makes me want to die that I've never been that thin

No. 1700616

>>1700586
Can you share it? I like craft channels like that

No. 1700621

>>1700616
Here yo go

No. 1700653

>>1700528
You're gonna be ok anon don't worry. It's been three weeks since I finished it and I didn't have any bad side effects. You're going to be fine.

No. 1700656

File: 1694994768541.png (478.98 KB, 640x480, thumb.png)

>>1700531
Happy birthday anon! I'm sorry you're having such a rotten time lately, sometimes we just go through shit but the bad times won't last forever. I wish you well.

No. 1700664

>>1700608
At one point in Japan a round face and blackened teeth was considered beautiful

No. 1700696

>>1700653
i truly want to believe this but i’ve had some funky side effects already. did you have any while you were taking it?

No. 1700717

>>1700696
Weird muscle tension in my jaw, calves, and ankles and some dizziness but that's about it. I was also on high alert the whole time so I don't know if I was thinking about things too hard the whole time and I'm fine now. If you have some really bad side effects then try to contact whoever prescribed it to you but I'm pretty sure you'll be ok to finish your course.

No. 1700728

File: 1695000811833.png (421.03 KB, 609x394, Screenshot 2023-09-18 at 04.33…)

i lost a good friend last year from my own stupid bullshit actions and his mom came into the store i work in and said she'd tell him she saw me. it drudged up a lot of shit i've been trying to not think about. i wish i could tell all the people i've hurt in the last 3 years why in part this all ramped up so badly.

No. 1700738

File: 1695001295354.png (984.18 KB, 800x720, 9f5.png)

Every day I wake up disappointed I didn't die in my sleep. My cat died the first week into the year, my health has gone to shit and my family is having health scares as well. I'm tired of my dead end job but I don't have other options. Inflation is making things harder and harder to live and I'll never get a halfway decent place of my own. A lot of my essential belongings need to be replaced but I can't afford it and need to save money for bills and another potential medical emergency. Our car broke down at home and now my boyfriend's car got broken into and destroyed. The little things I enjoy, I either can't have right now or lost interest. I'm fed up. It was one thing when I was simply depressed but now I have more to deal with than that. I'm ready to clock out of this life.

No. 1700758

BPDs are so fucking weird and annoying istg. I know this one bippie who will go out of her way to make plans with you on a set date and then ghost you the day of and then dress up as an elf and upload selfies of herself to social media instead kek. She'll just totally ghost you without a peep just to dress up and take pictures of herself sitting on her couch. She's done this to so many people within our shared social circle. It's happened to me like 4 times kekkkk. I have literally never asked her myself to hang out, she's always the one reaching out first. Weird as fuck.

No. 1700760

>>1700758
I cant stand bpds to the core of my being kek. They think they're manipulative masterminds, too. They don't seem to realize that people catch on to what they're doing quickly, they just don't want to deal with the conflict that arises from pointing it out.

No. 1700772

>>1700758
bpds are odd for sure but i don’t want to hate them because it’s not their fault
t. had a bpd made ex best friend

No. 1700794

I’m so fat but my life is so miserable that eating is the only thing that brings me joy and i hate my local gym and the manlet moids in it, they always stare and there are no female only gyms around me. I’m so ugly and disgusting I hate myself. I look retarded with my fat face and double chin. And it’s all my fault i can’t even complain to anyone or play the victim. I’m such a pig

No. 1700800

File: 1695009010165.jpeg (256.94 KB, 1898x2274, 0F1F202C-FD21-4BB3-9785-9821D9…)

How do you deal with people blatantly disrespecting and mocking you in public without going insane? I went outside with short sleeves today (I’m covered in old self harm scars) and these two teenage boys passed by me and started making fun of me and singing “cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort.” I try to laugh it off but it kills me to know that I’ll always be a mutilated freak and I can’t even talk about this shit to anyone because they start laughing too

No. 1700802

>>1700800
go back wojack faggot

No. 1700806

>>1700800
whenever i see teens acting like that in public, usually on public transportation, i remember that 99% of them are insecure or have to ask their parents for money or to go somewhere and i stop caring. they're kids, who gives a shit

No. 1700811

>>1700800
>wojak
please stop. to answer your question, teens are kids and kids are assholes. so ignore them. or just wear long sleeves. not to be mean but it’s kind of the consequences of your own actions.

No. 1700814

>>1700800
if they're old enough they should be white and not noticeable, maybe they've not yet healed. sadly you can't do much besides wearing long sleeves or long fingerless gloves. or just not giving a fuck about what moids (who live on easy mode since birth) think, they've never known true pain.

No. 1700815

>>1700800
You dont allow them to show, regardless of the weather. You find a lightweight white long-sleeved made of material specifically for like athletics or heat and you thug that shit out. You will never be in an environment where people are not going to make fun of you. That is just reality. You deal with it and move on. Don't show them.

No. 1700818

>>1700816
You are not regina george

No. 1700844

>>1700840
Theyre moid like because there's a faggot obsessively refreshing ot and stroking his micro

No. 1700852

>>1700844
he's posting gore now kek moids can't go tow seconds without having a frustration chimpout when no one takes their bait

No. 1700855

>>1700840
Thank you nonna. I think a lot of the women on here despise cutters and those of that ilk (BPDemons, anachans, etc) because a lot of cows display those qualities

No. 1700858

>>1700852
They think we care or haven't seen gore before. Its always bottom of the barrel, 6 months-2 years away from suicide types who do this though. I'm patient, I can wait.

No. 1700861

>>1700855
This isn't true at all btw, there's a man spamming right now and I promise he was all the edgy replies. If he weren't here you'd probably get just a few sympathetic posts but realistically telling you that the only way to prevent criticsm for them is to not show them.

No. 1700864

File: 1695011897202.jpg (171.49 KB, 677x1000, 96954072f76b8f008f0f9dbecd8495…)

Some of this gore being spammed looks like AI generated shit lmao, they even got lazy trying to find real sources

No. 1700866

>>1700800
Cover your arms bippie

No. 1700882

smells like troon in here

No. 1700886

In the past, we created technology to further humanity. Now we create it to further retardation.

No. 1700893

>>1700864
The one that I saw looked like a prosthetic

No. 1700928

>>1700893
Girl that was real.

No. 1700936

I looked through my ldr ex's socials and it's making me wonder if she's going to meet a girl across the other side of the continent. It's giving me a bittersweet kind of feeling because on one hand I'm happy for her, for finally getting to meet her best friend and the fact that she's probably overcome her anxiety of flying alone, on the other…just sad because that could have been us meeting together instead. I just feel bad and we're no longer in contact anymore but I hope, whatever she's up to, she's doing alright.

No. 1700941

>>1700936
I'm always curious about people who have had LDRs in the past with actual plans to meet and live together are at now

No. 1700943

>>1700941
NTA but I'm engaged now! We met online, and met in person 5 months later. Then lived the remaining 2 years as LDR until eventually moving in together.

No. 1700949

>>1700941
For my case, the whole jumping into moving in and living together thing terrified me because we had talked about it a lot even before meeting each other. Not that I wouldn't want to do that with her someday, it just gave me a sort of anxiety that I couldn't quite explain. Like I was afraid I was more in love with the fantasy of being with someone than actually being with HER? I never once doubted my feelings for her in the first place but deep down I don't think you can really know someone until you've actually met them irl which is why it's so important for LDRs to meet each other asap. Also in my experience, successful LDRs tend to be between women probably because lesbians have such a small dating pool and women tend to be better communicators.

No. 1700955

my ex jokingly requested a specific drawing of him and a friend all the way back in march and ever since i had it in the back of my mind to do it for his birthday. truth be told i have drawn it but i'm wondering… is it a bad idea??? his birthday is in a week. i'm the 1 who hurt him first and he understandably finds me a revolting person for that, we also have not spoken since late may.
is it a bad idea? i wasnt ever expecting good reception from him for this gift either, but it's more or less my thank you to him for helping me in so many ways.
imjust really torn, i know reaching out to an ex on their birthday is corny and common but god… i really wanted to give him this and then respect him by moving on myself.

No. 1700956

File: 1695018205395.gif (1.24 MB, 223x200, 1692561325740.gif)

I've been waking up with panic attacks more often. It freaks me out for a minute and then I feel a low level of annoyance because the feeling of my heart racing takes a while to calm down. My emotions are fucked up because while I know I should feel more, I just don't see a point to. I'm not completely numb, I still feel things, but the best way to describe it is that it's switched down to low instead of at baseline. I've felt like I've been outside of my body for longer than I really care to admit. It honestly would be nice for all of this to just end because the fatigue of it all is taxing.

No. 1700972

>>1700955
No. Leave him alone.

No. 1700987

All my sales figures are better than my coworkers. Hes still the favorite and I'm treated like shir by the boss all cause of my social retardation or hes just male and held to a lower standard. Today someone gave him a fat sales cut on a lower sale than mine. He made the same while doing less. I said damn that sucks and he said something like why cant you just be happy for me anon? I was about ready to cry cause the past month had been a whole mess for me. I am not happy in general. The most happy I am is sleeping in my dreams at this point. Probably depressed, I am broke, working this job with a new boss who ruins my self esteem. Somehow I get customers to like me but she treats me like shit. Legitimately makes my life harder by giving her favorites manager codes. No one wants to hear me vent but they'll dump all their amazing or terrible stuff on me. I feel alone sitting in my room or being online anywhere. To an extent LC is the only place I'm not weird. I'm so tired of life.

No. 1700989

>>1700955
>i really wanted to give him this and then respect him by moving on myself.
You might just be opening old wounds by doing that, is that fair?

No. 1700995

I'm sick and tired of retards that have scrotes live in their heads rent free. On top of that, the same retards expect this to be a female only space when it's an anon board. I feel like the majority of these retards really just want this site to be another forum or Twitter replacement.

No. 1700998

Been feeling really sad, overwhelmed, defeated, retarded, and panicky. I’m leaving soon for an exchange year at the other side of the world. I’ll be staying there for a year. I haven’t really told many people. I don’t have much family left anyway to tell. What there is left, we are mentally very distant, always have been. A grace and a curse. Anyway. I’m terrified. Not excited. It feels like I am being sent to a prison colony despite having dreamt about this before. My Nigel is so very supportive, he’ll be even paying most of it. I’m gonna miss him so bad, since he’s practically my world. Kinda pathetic I know. I feel like I’m letting him down too by not being excited. I am so lucky and privileged to have this opportunity. There’s a defeatist living in my head rent free, how do you kick them out?

No. 1701000

>>1700998
I'm happy for you anon, be happy for yourself and make the best of it. Enjoy your time, you don't need to tell anyone if you don't want to. I hope it goes well for you and your Nigel.

No. 1701018

File: 1695027142420.jpg (781.44 KB, 2560x1440, 058d3d450078b4bdbbfecf4.jpg)

Saw my neurologist, got a question relating to my home situation (the norm and done every meet) aaand I just burst into tears. Jokes on me for spending the bus ride in lamenting my lack of a relationship with the family I happen to live with. As expected there was no response past "uh… maybe see a psychologist" which was simultaneously comforting and aggravating. C'est la vie.

No. 1701036

I fucking hate driving I HATE IT NO I WONT GET USED TO IT FUCK THIS GAY EARTH im spending so much money getting my license and for WHAT i dont need a car i dont need to drive fuck this

No. 1701040

File: 1695030219654.jpg (103.26 KB, 794x1059, backoff.jpg)

my ex is a useless shit. he lovebombed me for one month, then strung me along for 3, only to come to the conclusion that he just wants to fuck. i hit him up with a bootycall because his dick and head is the only nice thing about him anyways, and this twat declines, saying he is too tired. get the fuck off my messages then. if he only wants to be a dick, i will treat him like the dick he is.

No. 1701042

I met this guy online and I’m not exaggerating when I say it’s the first time in years I’ve talked to a man and actually enjoyed it and felt listened to/understood. I don’t like him romantically because I barely know anything about him, but I get so excited to talk to him it’s so stupid. My heart starts beating really fast because I get so excitied and it’s even fucking with my sleep because I’ll try to go to bed and then wake up a few hours later feeling wide awake from the adrenaline. I actually hate myself for feeling this way lol. Why am I so fucking retarded? I need to force my brain to go back to normal and tell myself that he’s just a moid, which means that inevitably something is going to happen eventually one way or another that will end up making me upset. Dumb idiot brain!

No. 1701058

hes the perfect moid but he dick dont work 90% of the time. do you stay or go and whats your time limit

No. 1701059

>>1701058
>perfect moid
that’s logically not possible

No. 1701060

>>1701059
yeah i know anon, his dick dont work

No. 1701064

>>1701058
Literally happened to me. I could've had the boyfriend I deserved and I would've been happy with. I was only surprised by how oddly….. asexual he seemed.
Turns out he has micropenis due to a genetical condition.
Let me tell you. It sucks.

No. 1701066

My period was over a week late and now that it is here I wish it would go away again the initial joy has been depleted. Why must I suffer monthly

No. 1701068

>>1700989
yeah nonnie you're right, it'll make matters worse and it wouldn't be fair for him. i'll drop the idea, thank you

No. 1701081

>>1701058
Go before you start taking it personally. Sex shouldn't ever be a struggle in that area especially when you are young. I regret the YEARS I spent coddling my ex through penis problems

No. 1701083

>>1701058
Talk to him and ask if he's going to work on it, and what steps is he willing to take. If he's just going to be a sadsack about it and make it entirely your problem, then leave.

No. 1701103

>>1701081
noted anon, ive been thinking of an exit plan for awhile now even though its only been one month
>>1701083
yeah he knows its his own problem and is trying pretty much everything, changed his diet, working out daily, horny goat weed supplements. i keep telling him to see a doctor and he hasnt yet but i understand that seeing the doctor means accepting it as a real physical issue and thats scary. it pisses me off mostly but i keep thinking if i can just dose this man with viagra i'd be pretty happy

No. 1701108

>>1701103
So I'm guessing he hasn't gotten his testosterone checked? It could either be that or mental health issues. Normally I'd say to straight up leave right away, but it seems like he cares that it's bothering you and is actually trying.

No. 1701180

File: 1695051313920.gif (657.7 KB, 498x385, 1668811769137.gif)

just dropped all my chicken flautas to the ground, now i only have 3 left. im going to fucking kill myself

No. 1701186

I'm such a sheltered retard I can't believe I didn't know that if you're registered to an NHS dentist they'll kick you off if you don't visit after a while, even if it's only because you haven't needed to make an appointment. And it's near impossible to register back on the NHS after that. I'm gonna have to go private and spend hundreds.
I have the money, but I really feel like I'm wasting money I could have kept.

No. 1701188

Every time someone says that things are getting worse for women vs the 70s-80s I think about it a lot. I was like surely not. We couldn’t even have our own credit cards. But honestly I’m starting to think that actually it’s kinda true. I wonder if there are any surveys that could show whether or not women actually have more independent wealth today that before. As in, not just living better because of a male or joint situation. And I wonder how the rise of shit like onlyfans and instathottery/tittystreaming plays in. Aside from wealth, our healthcare is really not any better. We are losing/lost abortion.

What got me thinking was the phenomenon in things like ballet and figure skating, where the favorite athletes are becoming younger and younger and its becoming more of a way for men to consume girls contorting and destroying their bodies for male gaze. As well as how girls are becoming more sexualized earlier yet younger women are having less sex.

No. 1701199

>>1701036
Almost crashed the car twice during the lesson, had a panic attack after getting home and I've been crying on and off since. I'm not scared of driving I just don't want to do it, it's too stressful, I can't keep note of all the things I should and I'm a hazard for myself and everyone else on the road. I'm not good at these sorts of technical things and I hate I let myself get talked into it.

No. 1701204

>>1701199
I wanted to cry on my balcony in peace but some retarded moid is blasting porn. What the fuck how do people have no shame, there's windows and balconies and people everywhere.

No. 1701209

>>1700738
I got two more pieces of bad news last night, I don't know how much more I can take. Why did I wake up

No. 1701210

>>1701204
EW disgusting!!!! You should verbally abuse and shame him from your balcony ugh disgusting scrote I’m sorry nonna

No. 1701214

>>1701204
Scrotes have no shame, there's been a couple instances where classmates at uni were caught watching porn in class. I think some do it in public settings to get a reaction out of people.

No. 1701298

>>1701042
This makes me sad because last time i felt like this was years ago and that moid broke my heart. I remember feeling so heartbroken, i never felt like that in my entire life but im so glad im over it

No. 1701308

Went to a new therapist today and got an anxiety attack after the session. Haven't had one in like 6 years. I understand the therapy is not all fun and games, but there was no need to chew me out like that especially based on incorrect assumptions about my behavior

No. 1701330

>>1701308
holy hell fuck that guy. first session is supposed to be for getting to know you, not judgment zone. i hope you feel better soon nonna you deserve better than to be chastised by a shitty shrink

No. 1701357

>>1701000
Thanks for your kind words stranger. I’ll try my best to think and be positive.

No. 1701365

i want to be a neet so bad but how would i even make money?

No. 1701371

>>1701330
thanks nonny, you are right. I feel silly that I let it get to me, but it really stings when you try to be vulnerable and then get treated like this… I am better now though

No. 1701376

Men are so predictable. This guy who I have known for 14 years now suddenly adds me on his best friend’s stories, out of nowhere. He starts posting way more than before, just all these cute photos and quotes.
I have always liked his posts and stories, it was pretty normal for me. I still did it these past weeks. Suddenly he messages me asking me how I’m doing, that he noticed some likes and he wanted to know how I’m doing.
Mind you, we hooked up 10 years ago. Just once. He had a girlfriend afterwards for 8 years or so. She broke up with him a month ago.
Do they really think this is attractive? Like, I get he wants to reconnect with people and maybe he’s feeling lonely but he’s not my friend, he’s just some acquaintance who I only talked with three times in the past 14 years. Starting a conversation with the excuse of me liking his photos is pretty awkward to me, too forced. Idk maybe I’m just too picky, I’m not interested because I’m in a relationship and I know he’s just doing it to break the ice but ugh it gives me the ick.

No. 1701383

>>1701376
Update he left me on read when I didn't try to flirt back with him and I gave him short answers kek

No. 1701391

Dog put down today. Unsaged memorial post. I love her so much and always will

No. 1701393

>>1701391
My dumb ass saged the post

No. 1701395

>>1701393
you saged this one too nona. here i'll bump it for you, rest in peace and may she forever play in the heavenly woods

No. 1701423

I wish I could just separate myself from the trans movement in my personal life for my own mental health, but I can't stomach just seeing people get sucked into giving themselves all these permanent medical problems and issues from being lied to.

I went through medical malpractice and got PTSD from it so it kills me inside when I see young trans people doing this to themselves and snapping at anyone warning them about the side effects as a terf.

In general I can't deal with it. I already struggle with lack of a social support system. Then every other online person my age (especially autistics) is getting sucked into these problems and I can't even save them. Like I just saw a donation post from some 20 something person with breast cancer. I clicked on their profile and they were a trans man who had been taking testosterone for 6 years.

I have another friend who's pro trans, and I tried explaining that testosterone will cause breast and ovary cancer, so FTMs have to get a double masectomy and hysterectomy after 5 years, and they immediately started arguing with me saying that that's rare and not always necessary. Even trans activists acknowledge this.

The thing that drives me insane is that I'll sit and explain to this friend how pharmaceutical companies don't give a shit about patients, they'll agree. I'll explain hospitals are run by sociopaths, the medical industry in general selects for sociopaths, they'll agree. I'll point out how it's not ableist to say a psychiatrist is evil for giving some teenager klonopin for years, they'll agree. Then I'll point out how transitioning has certain bad side effects, they get defensive.

I already struggle enough with mentally coping with my own medical issues, and they're nothing compared to what these people go through. I don't even hate trans people but I am so horrified for these people.

No. 1701459

>>1701423
You don’t have to respond it’s just me being genuinely curious, what happened? How was malpractice done against you?

No. 1701462

It really feels like I was born broken. As a kid, I would cry myself to sleep almost every night but I never knew why I was crying. I remember it so distinctly. I was just sad. Devastated. At like 5 years old. Why was my mother not concerned?

No. 1701492

My bf has a very low sex drive.i know its caused by 2 legit reasons but I can't help but use it as an excuse to hate myself even more. No loves me.im fat, ugly and hideous. Fuck you birches for constantly whining about ur husband pressuring you to have sex and crying cos he wants to touch you. How horrible!!!!! What an awful husband!!!!! I wish a husband would pressure me.

No. 1701511

>>1701423
I have body dysmorphia and have been afraid to get help for this reason. It seems like I'm unable to feel bad about my body without getting sucked into the "maybe you're trans?" thing, especially having PCOS and not feeling feminine due to it and lots of troons use PCOS to push the trans narrative onto women instead of allowing women to get proper treatment for it, we're told to fuck up our hormones even more

No. 1701518

tmi as hell sorry
>no period for almost 3 months
>confirmed to have cysts, going to see gyno soon
>every time i wipe for the past couple days it’s a lot of brown and some red
are my cysts popping? is this pcos? who knows

No. 1701541

I wish 10k would drop from the sky. I’m so sad. Chronic illnesses fucking suck I hate seeing my loved one in pain. She deserves the world and I can’t fucking help her

No. 1701580

>>1701492
cheat on him

No. 1701588

>>1701391
I'm sorry about your dog anon, may she rest in peace.

No. 1701600

Today I drew fanart instead of studying, I am a piece of shit. I'm supposed to study 90+ min every day if I want to pass this cert test but instead I only study 2-3x a week. I feel like I'm still the same person I was at 16 with the same habits and interests.

I don't know what I do all day. Time just flies by without my noticing. I wish I didn't have to work or study or anything else and could just do what I want all day (writing and drawing and maybe cooking.) I also didn't exercise because I am a LAZY SHIT.

No. 1701624

Nonnas I think I had a seizure. Idk what happened, I just kinda blanked for a bit, dropped the phone on my face, and twitched uncontrollably for like, 45 seconds. I tried to stay still but I couldn’t, I even accidentally kicked my cat cause I couldn’t control my body.
I’m worried. I can’t even find the time to take showers with new baby, no less go to the doctor. Plus my wife needs my support, she’d crumble into dust without me. I know I need to get checked out, but I’m also on my parents health insurance and the seizure scares before all came back negative. I don’t want her to think I’m faking it
As of now, I’m afraid to hold my baby. This happened so fast, and it was just my phone and cat this time. If I have something else like this with my baby, I couldn’t live with myself.

No. 1701626

>>1701624
>my baby
are you talking about the cat you accidentally kicked? what's the problem if your wife stays with your kitty while you go to the doctor? but yes, you should't hold the cat on your hands until you get checked, she might get hurt. cats don't deserve hurt.

No. 1701640

So many options of what to do with my life, none of them good.

No. 1701643

I was doing alright. I started school again, I've been seeing my supports on a weekly basis, Ive cut out weed and even went two weeks clean from self harm. However, I have terrible PMS mixed with mental health issues so I've been so irritable, angry and suicidal.
I relapsed on Friday. Today,I went to class this morning and could barely pay attention and i went home and slept all day. Now its 12am and i dont know what to do

Even though i still stuggle with cutting, i have been able to abandon my NEET ways and feel more stable. Im terrified im going to regress back to how i was before i started taking my recovery seriously. I want to kill myself rn.

No. 1701648

>>1701626

Sorry, my human baby. I’m a mom too now. My cats already forgiven me, she’s cuddling right now. I’m not too worried about her because she can run away, and land on her feet. My human baby is 2 months old. I talked about it in the baby talk thread, but my wife is seriously worn out from nursing, she needs to sleep a lot and I care for human baby when she rests

No. 1701655

>>1701624
From what I understand, unless you have a seizure like at the ER or in front of the doc, it's hard to diagnose anything. I'm pretty sure they try to induce them when you go into real tests.

No. 1701658

I wish I was an alpaca so I can actually die from loneliness

No. 1701671

lol achilles heel burning pain absolutely so fun again FUCK cipro maybe i should stop taking this poison

No. 1701672

If I never loved this person in the first place (according to them) why does it hurt so much when I look at past DMs, and feel so much guilt when I realize how I could have treated my ex better? I wish I wasn't so withdrawn and avoidant. I wish I could have been more open, more vulnerable, and shown that I cared. I read so many romance stories between healthy loving couples, but I can't even replicate that kind of love story in my life. I'm just an empty shell of a human being incapable of love and affection.

No. 1701675

Two days to prepare for an interview for a company that Glassdoor says is easy to get into. I have a recommendation. Can God or whatever please toss me a fucking bone I am tired. I NEED to get out of this house.

If I wake up with a bug or something on my face I will scream.

No. 1701677

How do I explain to my EE mom that a panic disorder isn't something you can just will yourself out of? I've been having panic attacks again and she keeps berating me for 'letting myself succumb' to them.

No. 1701683

File: 1695102020330.jpg (14.21 KB, 228x214, 167800543.jpg)

>>1700517
>you see, i'm a GFE tuber,
can't believe i'm sharing a site with someone like this

No. 1701695

I wish I was a normalfag who didn't get into anime at a young age.
Anime gave me such unrealistic expectations of men, real life men are so tiresome and disappointing most of the time.
I wonder how my mom would feel if I had ever told her I was in love with a fictional character kek.
That being said there are still characters from years ago that make my heart go doki doki.
Oh well, guess I'll just indulge in my fantasies. It keeps the heart young.
Ofc I want to fall in love irl but it has to happen naturally.

No. 1701698

How are we supposed to live when everything is so expensive and companies are bastards that only want to pay $15/hr, if that? I'm so tired of it all. I don't mind working hard, I just want to earn a living wage and not lose all sense of self in the process.

No. 1701706

>>1701698
You know what they have to start doing. Nine letters. Starts with G ends in tine.

No. 1701707

>>1701706
Ten letters. My mistake.

No. 1701713

>>1701492
Tranny tier. Lose weight then fatass.

No. 1701715

>>1701713
I'm scrolling LC right now and all I see are unfunny shit one liners like this so I know they're all yours and I'm letting you know right now that it's a good time to kill yourself

No. 1701716

>>1701715
nta but was just thinking that, smells like moid spirit

No. 1701720

File: 1695111600112.gif (32.44 KB, 548x67, smells like moid spirit.gif)

>>1701716
Thanks for inspiring me

No. 1701739

>boyfriend found the big cut dicks folder
Uh oh

No. 1701750

Just found out my crush has a girlfriend and she's ugly and fat. I also heard from people her character is shitty and she doesn't even respond when someone greets her. I will get over it but right now it just makes me feel weird. If she was more attractive than me I would simply be jealous for a while and then I would get over it. But this? I'm starting to ask myself, what's wrong with me if I can't find a nice, responsible, tall and not ugly guy like him when even she could do it. They met by accident when she was 19 and he was 25, but still. My environment is pretty shitty and I imagine it must be hard to meet someone decent in general, and still, she had more luck than me. I could get someone who's at least on his level but I can't. I'm confused

No. 1701759

My tummy huuuuuuurts god please help mee when I will get over this fucking cold???

No. 1701768

>>1701739
Time to schedule him an appointment

No. 1701771

>>1701715
The fuck you're talkin about? Says the fatty who's mad normal women aren't desperate to get raped because of low self-esteem

No. 1701772

File: 1695125353358.jpg (58.02 KB, 665x187, Screenshot_20230919-083052_1.j…)

I understand anon was a kid and this was posted in the celebricows thread which is notoriously unhinged, but sometimes I get genuinely sick reading some post here and I'm tired of pretending this type of shit is okay just because it was a dog. This is just plain cruel and not funny at all, why would you post about chasing an old, blind, probably very weak animal until it peed like it's some hilarious joke? Disgusting

No. 1701773

>>1701772
The random shit people share KEK

No. 1701774

>>1701772
Never work or volunteer in vet med. I ended up leaving the field because apparently you can get ptsd just from people describing the torture to you while you work on the victim and that's what ended up happening to me.
The way that people casually mention the horrific and torturous things they do to animals will leave you permanently broken and wishing you could erase your brain.

No. 1701776

>>1701774
What do you mean? These people bring in their pets and describe how they tortured them? Or they didn't know they were hurting their animal? The only thing I've heard are people trying to rip their dogs' nipples off because they thought they were zits or bugs (who the fuck rips off zits).

No. 1701777

i hate visiting home i only go back every 2 years or so, mom turned our childhood home into a hoarder house after i left for uni, its a really expensive apartment in a prime location but its completely rundown inside because mom never bothered to maintain the house and instead spends the little money she makes on lip fillers and botox after her and dad got divorced 15 years ago. None of the doors have handles, glass panel of the bathroom door is broken so you have to put a towel over it and leave it ajar even when you're showering. Shower doesnt work so we use a bucket to take showers, dishwasher doesnt work there are piles and piles of dirty dishes in the kitchen, my grandma who lives with us very obviously has advanced alzheimers but mom refuses to acknowledge it and there are dried shit stains all over the toilet and the bathroom floor because my grandma is incontinent. I asked my brother to go on a trip to europe with me during my annual leave and he gave me sass about not visiting home. I dont have a room anymore, mom and my bed bound grandma sleep in my old room on this piss bed (its a big house so they spend all their time in that room to save on heating). I don't want to go home because my mom will bitch about my dad and the fucking divorce issues that has been ongoing since I am 13 stressing me out, i will have to feed and clean my demented grandmother who starts nonstop screaming at the top of her lungs if you leave her sight for 2 seconds. i picked up the habit of having headphones on at all times in the house because of her. i sleep in the living room everytime i visit and have a difficult time trying to fall asleep because the pillows smell of piss, everything smells like piss and shit in that house. everything is broken, everything is dirty. im sick of talking to lawyers everytime i go back, im sick of going to the notary. I geniunely think mom is an astonishingly stupid woman, i dont know if she has always been this way or the divorce fucked her head up but i started realizing this when i was 18 and she told me she resented me for thinking i'm smarter than her (i never outright said she was stupid to her face or to anyone else). The way she sees the world, how irresponsible she is with her money, how irresponsible she is with her work, her priorities in life, her living environment is so abysmal im starting to think this is something beyond stupidity and she might be mentally challenged. I called her for advice the other day, i work in healthcare and seeing death, misery and lonely old people all day takes a toll on me and i'm just burnt out. I was ranting to her about this and she very seriously suggested that i take care of the lonely old people at my own house. First of all thats something a 5 year old would suggest and secondly for her to suggest that when i'm talking about being overwhelmed its like she doesnt even comprehend what im saying. I cant relate to her and she cant relate to me, everytime i ask for advice she gives the most useless stupid childish reply it makes me feel like i'm her mom and she's a 5 year old child.

No. 1701779

Ah, my brother is an asshole I think. Super disappointing that he followed dad's footsteps. How it went at home was dad basically bullies mom and she not only puts up with it but defends it, really sad. I have/had anger issues and was miserable like dad but have worked on myself hard to be a trusting, positive and as a result happier person.

My brother visited me recently for a few days and was such an asshole for no reason. He'd be condescending and make passive aggressive remarks. And I was trying very very hard to stay positive because i'm acutely aware i'm the most normal family member. Twice over the two days he was here I snapped and told him to fuck off, who does he think he is etc. Like I really went off. Each time he was shocked at my reaction? I mean the precedent was never set but it seems like he thinks he can walk over me like dad does to mum despite me unfortunately taking after dad more in that respect. He flew all the way from our home country just to try drag me back to the way I was kek.

In all seriousness, is it a trend that of the children in dysfunctional families the boys end up going the "bad" way? And girls go more the doormat route but I'm trying to do neither.

No. 1701784

File: 1695128426132.jpg (1.39 MB, 2054x1371, Genichiro.Ashina.jpg)

Just when I thought my dysphoria finally went away (or became more manageable) it creeps back on me. Literally a video game character triggered it lmao

No. 1701787

>>1701784
>triggered by an ugly video game character
Get medicated

No. 1701792

>>1701784
Just dress like the character or get a similar hairstyle, you don’t have “dysphoria” you just want to look cool. Maybe you have instead dysmorphia, in any case, you need psychological help.

No. 1701795

>>1701787
I don't care about being an "ugly" male, I just wish I was one. No matter how much I take care of myself or exercise, the male physique will forever not be within my reach and neither will be their strength. Besides, there's more to that. Like the way society values men and them being less hindered by biological inconveniences that burden women.
>>1701792
It won't change the fact that I'm not a biological man. I'm a shut-in for the most part but sometimes when I get out, I see regular men that I wish I could skinwalk so it's not just vidya/anime cool characters. Besides, there's lot of cool women too both in media and irl that I admire but for some reason, I just wish I was a man still.

No. 1701799

>>1701787
Dunno who that is but he's hot

No. 1701800

>>1701795
you're a tif? that's hearbreaking nona. be kind to yourself

No. 1701812

>>1701776
Most don't know they're torturing them, but I also don't understand how, because what they do is awful. Some of it is overt, like multiple owners have held their dog down while it screams and burned off its nipples with a lighter because they thought they were ticks. It else they cut them off with razors. Owners decline treatment just because they don't want to deal with it, dogs bleeding and in agony but they decline the simplest of antibiotics and pain killers that would help. Then there's the more subtle stuff were owners leave dogs in tiny kennels for 16 hours a day, sitting in their own waste with no toys or even bedding (because the dog tears it up out of boredom) for day after day, year after year until the dog goes insane and chews off it's own flesh. At least fifty percent of owners give their pets no stimulation or toys. An endless line of customers like that, and it just caused me to go insane when I think about how many animals are being tortured in every home I walk past. So I left and now after spending the first decade and a half of my career making my "dreams" come true and becoming one of the best in general practice, I don't know what to do.
I just never want to hear about the things people do to their animals again. I want to live in complete ignorance of what is happening to the animals in people's homes.

No. 1701831

>>1701772
Same here. I don't like dogs at all but I would never distress an animal on purpose

No. 1701841

>>1701831
>I don't like dogs but-
we literally do not care. I never understand why people do this. why can't people like you who feel the need to make note of how much you hate the thing you're sympathising with before you sympathise with it just… not do that? why can't you just show empathy? like, are you that scared of someone assuming you… dare I say… LIKE dogs? it's so fucking retarded and autistic.

No. 1701847

>>1701841
Your reading comprehension is shit. Do you really not understand they're trying to say not liking something doesn't give you a reason to mistreat or abuse it?

No. 1701852

>>1701695
I feel you nonna, I think my brain must be broken from crushing on anime men while growing up. Real moids do nothing for me 99% of the time so I'm mostly content with having a husbando to give my love to. Although sometimes I feel like it'd be nice to have an IRL relationship and someone to come home to at the end of the day until I remember how disgusting and pornsick even the most pleasant seeming scrotes are then I'm back to being a hardcore husbandofag KEK

No. 1701854

>>1701841
>>1701831
>>1701812
why even are there so many dog haters on here? i've seen a lot of love for cats but so much unbridled schizo rage whenever dogs are mentioned. seems exhausting to hate an animal so much.
some anons mentioned liking cats because in their heads cats=women and dogs=men, but it can't be that surely? nobody is that much of an imbecile right?

No. 1701855

>>1701847
my point is that they don't need to say that, you fucking ding dong. it's pretty much assumed that any normal person wouldn't torture innocent animals even if they didn't like the breed, so her saying 'well I don't like dogs but even I think it's wrong!' is a waste of fucking time and makes her sound like a low-empathy autistic scrote. she's not saying 'I hate dogs' to follow up with '…but abusing them is wrong', she's doing it to point out how special she is for likely sitting on the dog hate threads and sneeding about 'mutts' like a freak. anyway, I'll leave this here since you clearly need it: https://www.scholastic.com/parents/books-and-reading/reading-resources/developing-reading-skills/improve-reading-comprehension.html(infighting)

No. 1701856

I used to wonder how men could date women when they think so little of them, and now I feel that way about men. I am currently dating a man, and I think I've just come to the point where I have so little respect or trust in men that when he fucks up, I almost pity him because he can't help being a chromosoid. That isn't to say I put up with bullshit - I trust him, he supports me and I support him, he respects my boundaries - but it's just such a lower level than what women put into relationships. It's worth it for me at the moment to stay in this relationship, and I love him, but I'm realizing loving a man fundamentally entails loving something that is never going to be as ascended as you are.

Even if he's "one of the good ones" - as in, I trust with my full heart that he would never abuse someone - men are just so defective biologically, morally, spiritually, and emotionally that I would pity them if they hadn't made themselves so undeserving of pity. They live shorter lives and are more prone to health problems. They are more inclined to violence, and are so hedonistically absorbed that they are much more likely to develop addictions and ruin their own lives pursuing pleasure. They can't even see colors as well as we can. They get fat and bald and hairy. There are more male geniuses, sure, but there are also more male retards. And both ends of that spectrum come with severe emotional disturbances. Women as a whole are smarter, healthier, more stable emotionally, more socially and spiritually inclined, more aesthetically lovely, and better at handling adversity.

Developing this outlook has made me feel a lot happier in my relationship. At this point in my life, I truly and genuinely believe that men are inferior to women. This makes sense from an evolutionary perspective - men are only supposed to be around to breed while still young and then die while still young, protecting their tribe/family. Once a man reproduces, he has no reason to stay alive. This is why men are so much more likely to have cringe midlife crises. They have had no evolutionary incentive to develop morally, spiritually, emotionally, or socially. If my nigel ever finds out I think this way, he'll probably leave me, but it's also a defect on his part that he's incapable of understanding how true this is. No one wants to accept their inferiority. Men's ego blinds them to this truth. I wish I wasn't attracted to men, because I am fully aware of their inferiority.

No. 1701858

>>1701854
it is almost 100% because of that. it's just absolute autism. there's a reason they shayna thread attracts so many retards who start foaming at the mouth whenever her dog is posted but start literally crytyping at the mere suggestion of one of her fugly cats being litcherally abused by shayna putting it on her bed during a stream or something. that thread probably has the lowest collective IQ of nearly all the threads on this entire site

No. 1701860

>>1701854
>I don’t like dogs
>unbridled schizo rage
That’s why. Dogfags are like narcissists who FREAK if people aren’t obsessed with them.

No. 1701861

>>1701858
It’s literally one person memeing

No. 1701862

>>1701860
I never said I liked or disliked dogs, I don't own one, and there is literally a dog hate thread that gets bumped relatively frequently, as does the cat love thread.

No. 1701869

>>1701862
Clearly you don’t read the thread just get triggered by the title. Sage and hide.

No. 1701870

>>1701777
parent child role reversal is more common and especially as parents get older. your mother is not someone you can open up to and resents you.

No. 1701881

I saw something that reminded me of an unhappy time of my life and it was really upsetting and it kinda made me nauseous.

No. 1701888

>>1701854
Y'know I've noticed that my self too. There is a noticeable bias against dogs and for cats here. Like as >>1701858 said. There's a noticeable difference in the severity in which people will react in how cats and dogs are treated by cows or others. It's fucking weird if you ask me, especially when you see the dog hate thread and the sheer autistic schizos saying the most disturbing things like dogfuckers or shitbeasts but if you said anything similar about cats you'd have twenty people jumping down your throat. I honestly think it's just pure unironic autism from some of these people.

No. 1701893

>>1701888
I think it’s just because when a dog is bad or annoying it becomes everyones problem but if a cat is an asshole it’s really only gonna affect the people who own it.

No. 1701894

I might have to start spending 3+ hours a day on a fucking bus because these fucking companies are so against remote work they're dumping all the consequential stress onto their already overworked, underpaid, and stressed out employees forcing unnecessary commutes to sit in a depressing gray cubicle in a backrooms liminal hell instead of giving them one common human decency which would not only cost them nothing, it would save them money. but nnooooooooooooo. I've been unemployed more than 6 months and am out of options. I was trying to hold out for a remote job, which were plentiful in 2021 and 2022. Now it's all gone. Plus an hour mandated lunch and that means I'll have to leave my apartment at 6am and won't return until 6pm or later.

I give up, I pray to God to destroy the world. Flood it again. I wish I was never born.

No. 1701895

I'm a BPDchan myself and am treating myself but I feel so lost that I can't give my friend any tips on how to deal with his girlfriend. she is turbo latched onto him, she doesn't want him anymore and he is just apart of her "harem" but if he leaves she'll ruin his life with things he has told his entire friend group and things only her mind twisted.
it's exhausting the both of us… i love them both, his girlfriend reminds me of me and i hate it.

No. 1701897

>>1701895
I assume you’re young af. What can possibly ruin his life unless he did heinous acts?

No. 1701901

>>1701897
i'm in my mid 20s, his girlfriend is… i won't say. their situation is messy and i know it's weird to defend a moid on this website but this mess is only partly his fault and i got involved unwillingly. while he hasn't done anything heinous, during conversations he just mentions his shitty experiences as a kid and for some reason her brain has her thinking that he enjoyed it, twisted his words to ME and is using that as blackmail toward his teaching job. i feel as if even the simplest accusation could fuck things up

i know this should go on the mental disorders thread or the BPD thread but i'm really tired of her shit and she has done nothing but hurt me. used to be a real good friend and am just conflicted.

No. 1701904

>>1701893
badly raised cats are a nuisance and detrimental to nature. badly bred/raised dogs literally rip grown adults faces and arms off (and also a detriment to nature). one is significantly worse than the other. and the insane dog people all insist on dragging their hellbeasts into playgrounds, groceries, and restaurants and making their pets everyone else's problem too.

No. 1701906

>>1701893
I like cats but that's just bullshit. "Bad" cats have killed several of my birds, and also shat and peed on my and other neighbors backyards which smelled absolutely putrid, plus the diseases. Again, I don't hate cats, but they can become a real nuisance at best if not trained too

No. 1701913

>>1701695
I got my unrealistic expectations from the angels at church before getting into anime kek. Husbandofagging is as old as imagination itself

No. 1701916

File: 1695142308215.jpg (26.55 KB, 600x586, 177e.jpg)

>>1701901
>i'm in my mid 20s, his girlfriend is… i won't say.

No. 1701923

Just so overwhelmed

No. 1701935

I was about to masturbate to my husbando but then I saw a video of that big-eared inbred bitch Prince Charles sticking his tongue out and licking his lips and I'm so fucking turned off now

No. 1701939

>>1701869
What is there to read? Dogfag this, dogfag that and stories about how ugly and disgusting dogs are unlike "precious cattos". Get a personality.

No. 1701943

>>1701939
Pretty sure a housecat has never mauled someone to death. NTA

No. 1701952

my cat just scared the shit out of me, she laid there in a weird position and eyes wide open, i immediately thought that there must be something wrong but when i jumped to see what's up with her she just meowed at me and walked away. her position seriously looked so strange, as if she was stiff. i've never seen her lay like that. i need to calm down

No. 1701956

I dropped a book on my toe just now and separated the cuticle from the nail, the pain is like if a stubbed toe could rip flesh. REEEEEEE

No. 1701961

Its so weird going from a moid that ignores you most of the week, demands nudes to ignore/nitpick them, and lies a lot while demanding your every move to going to a healthy relationship with someone who actually acts like they like you. I almost feel pathetic that I get so happy over the littlest acknowledgement or having a partner that acts sexually attracted to me even though that should have been what I expected all along. I don't even know why I ever even putting up with that

No. 1701962

I hope the fucker who beeped at me because she thought I was too slow (even when I was careful because there was this huge storm happening) arrived too late to wherever she was going.
Also her car stopped right after she beeped idk why and four or five cars were passing her by and beeping at her (karma). When she drove past me, she did this little beep in the most passive aggressive way as if she was saying it was my fault.
People are stupid.

No. 1701968

>>1701943
For the second time I don't care about cats vs dogs, I own rats, just stop being unhinged.

No. 1701979

>>1701968
Finally another rodent anon. Couldnt give two shits about the cat vs dog anons. Rodent, aquarium, bird, reptile anons unite!

No. 1701982

My mom is sick of me being mentally ill and is forcing me into therapy. I don't believe the doctors and therapists here are really the right fit for my issues. I feel trapped. I've always been this way. My whole life. I don't think I'm fixable at this point. But she's acting like a conversation and some pills will cure me. She literally said it's time to cure this. And when I inevitably don't get better it'll be my fault. Too lazy, too unmotivated, why didn't you try harder. Just overcome your issues. Stop being weird. God I don't want to waste money on therapy. I just got a great job and I don't want to fuck myself up with pills and not be able to function. I feel like this is the end. Am I being unreasonable?

No. 1701990

I cannot work out at a lady’s gym
I cannot work out at a regular gym
Men are pigs and women at gyms are crabby hoes
But the crabby hoes bug me the most. Why are women jealous of each other i stead of supporting? Wtf?

No. 1701993

Its crazy how nice men are to you when they find you attractive. Why cant they always be like this?

No. 1702008

I don’t really get cat hate, they’re smaller and less stinky and not 140 lbs. Sure they can be assholes but literally any animal on this earth is better than a pitbull.
I don’t hate dogs, just pitbulls. Absolutely fuck pitbulls.

No. 1702018

>>1701982
Congrats on the new job, anon! Depending on your issues, you don’t need to get on meds if you don’t want to. When I did therapy, my psychologist recommended me trying to wean off anti-depressants to ~access my feelings~ more. That being said, it sucks that your mom is forcing you to do this and she sounds like a narc. I think therapy can be beneficial if you want to try it, but if she thinks it’s gonna magically turn you into a different person then the basis for doing it is wrong. Sounds like she also might use some therapy.

No. 1702024

>>1701904
>hellbeasts
This, this is kind of stuff I'm talking about. Very autistic.

No. 1702027

the art thread was my last favorite thread and the retards are flinging shit at each other in there now. sigh

No. 1702045

File: 1695149731001.gif (2.03 MB, 498x498, shinji-ikari.gif)

Feeling like this at the moment

No. 1702062

Its not my fault you locked your keys in your car! Its not my fault that you cant find your spare key either!
I just bought you an AAA membership so you could use the service and you are upset there is a 24 hour grace period?
Fucking idiot this is all your fault. Times like these make me reconsider our situation.
And no, I am not going to use my AAA service, I get 3 calls a year before they charge. You can wait it out fuckhead.
You spent all weekend hellbent to take on any other task than the keys. Suffer the consequences.

No. 1702081

I bleed a little after orgasm, its been happening during around my ovulation since the covid vaccines fucked up my periods so badly. I thought it would go away because my period is kind of back to normal now but no, it still happens if I orgasm during ovulation. I should see a doctor but I kinda dont care. I have so many physical problems like hearing loss and scoliosis but I cant be bothered somehow. I know Ill regret not taking action but it feels like so much work fixing these already. Why won't our bodies fix themselves after all this evolution

No. 1702114

File: 1695153249974.jpeg (308.84 KB, 750x687, IMG_0865.jpeg)

>>1702008
>t. this guy’s neighbor

No. 1702142

We moved here 7 years ago and I'm still the same loser who couldn't move out, has next to no skills and makes less than 20k a year because I'm a lazy piece of shit. How embarrassing. I think I lived a good life, I got to do some of the things I wanted to do, there is so much unfulfilled but if I couldn't accomplish them in the last 7 years I doubt that'll change and I don't really care about those things anymore. I'm ready to leave this world, 3 decades are enough. I've seen enough.

No. 1702144

>>1702114
Kek I'm not a fan of pitbulls either but that one is alright. Maybe I'll feed it a toddler if I come across it.

No. 1702178

File: 1695161579910.jpg (14.69 KB, 500x293, bce9b4bca13f7eafa639f5a0a1a94f…)

I always want to prove to normies that they're wrong and I'm right. I hate the fact they talk about worthless shit and that they can be happy about meaningless stuff, you can call me petty or miserable but they're they ones incapable of any deeper thought or empathy, just listen to what most of them think about the poor or mentally ill or low wage people or just people who were less lucky than them in general. I'm not poor and I'm financially stable and when I mask well I can pass for a slightly eccentric normie, at least for a while, but I will NEVER feel like a part of THEM, especially when they show me their ugly thoughtless unempathetic simpleton side. I fucking hate them, I can never connect with them, I also hate the fact I'm not capable of being like them, my life would've been so much easier. I'm so angry I can't cope. All my fucking life, pre school, school, now work. The same shit every fucking day, I have to be around those fucking aliens who have nothing in common with me and who have it so much easier than me because they happened to be born as normies. Some of them even 'like' me. But it's only because I mask to survive in a normie filled workplace. They only like the surface of 'me', which is plain and easy going. They like plain and easy going. They don't like to think and question things. Sometimes I want to grab them and scream at them. You fucking pathetic normie YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S STUPID! YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THE WORLD AND YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING

No. 1702179

>>1702081
If it helps, I also bleed a little after having an orgasm or exercising during ovulation, and my doctor told me it was normal and nothing to worry about when I went to have it checked. It's always good to be cautious of abnormal bleeding, but hopefully you'll have one less thing to worry about.

No. 1702184

>>1702081
Holy shit you're like the 8th person I've heard of who had fucked up periods after the Covid vaccine. One of my good friends had a NONSTOP PERIOD for over a month straight after getting the vaccine, it was hell for her. I don't know why I haven't heard more widespread coverage of this, I'm guessing it's because women's health issues aren't "real" issues according to the rest of the world and 2. anyone pointing out any side effects at all are labeled as crazy or anti-vax or something.

No. 1702186

File: 1695162367595.jpeg (15.21 KB, 231x218, 4FE1821C-6312-4EF7-9E16-4046C4…)

excruciating. Exhausting. Why can’t I be normal.

No. 1702191

File: 1695163778468.png (414.92 KB, 720x704, Cropped_Image_20230919_101028.…)

It's embarrassing to admit but this type of stupid ass anime memes really help me cope. I'm not doing so well mentally. Sorry.

No. 1702192

I might be cursed. Seems like everyone gets the ick once they meet me in person or even talk to me online for the first time. They treat me weird from the first second, even if I try my best to be friendly.
It's not the tism btw, I was tested for it and I don't have it.

No. 1702194

>>1702192
you may have icktism

No. 1702206

>>1702184
Exactly. Moids will have little tummy aches and it's a deal but making women deadly anemic is fine apparently

No. 1702219

I like the concept of some man liking me, but when there is a real possibility of the existence of a man who likes me I feel disgusted. Just. No. I am fine living my life of an old kissless virgin.

No. 1702220

is incredible how just ONE FAGGOT can rot the entire mood of the entire board, insane.

No. 1702221

>>1702220
I need context

No. 1702226

>>1702221
lots of the posts on the dumbass shit thread are specifically designed to bait in conflict, they're literally not even trying anymore, they just go and take a shit on the carpet right there

No. 1702233

>>1702194
is it at least curable

No. 1702234

>>1702220
Theyre always so pleased with themselves too, it's embarassing

No. 1702243

not to be a phone poster but how has this site never been even slightly optimized for phones? how does crystal cafe have better optimization for example ??

No. 1702246

>>1702226
More context, what do you mean?

No. 1702247

>>1702243
I never used to have problems until recently after that shit update, now webms are crazy slow and I can't upload a majority of pictures. Absolute shit now but it wasnt so bad before.

No. 1702265

Not to be petty and autistic but it hurts when a friend chooses to talk to “my enemy” about my favorite game and series of all time rather than me.
I am genuinely autistically into this video game series and it’s been my favorite series since before grade school. I know literally everything, way more than that retarded moid.

No. 1702300

>>1702184
This happened to my friends and I too. I swear every woman had changed in their menstrual cycles due to the COVID vaccine.
>>1702243
Phone posting should be discouraged imo.
I found out that my boyfriend's former friend made comments about finding me hot one night while they were drinking a few years back. I find it weird and strange that he didn't tell me but he said he didn't want to make it a big deal and that he kept an eye on him ever since. It explains him being aggressive towards this guy since they're no longer friends anyways but I wish I had known because he would send me weird apologies for his behavior towards other women.

No. 1702320

I miss being together during mundane events. Just put the phone down. I know the car ride is 10 boring minutes, but we could maybe giggle about the silly dinner we just had or poke each other playfully…I miss those dumb down times feeling like I actually experience time with you. I hate the phone addiction rampant around me. More alone than ever. I struggle too. But I try real hard to put it away around others. We were talking and laughing til you pulled the phone out at the first 2 seconds of silence…then no more conversation. God I miss you so much.

No. 1702338

File: 1695175953603.jpg (48.77 KB, 580x381, 1404101100591.jpg)

I just found out I've forgot to renew my vehicle registration this year and I've also been driving with an expired pink slip for over a year (still insured tho). With my insurance company I can't do anything online so I have to wait a few days for the new slip to come in the mail and in the meantime since I have work and public transport isn't an option for me I'm just going to leave the expired slips at home and plead dumb if I get pulled over. It's illegal to drive without insurance where I live kek I can't fucking believe I accidentally skirted the law like this for so long. I'm sweating anyways I hate being poor

No. 1702339

>>1702265
I feel this so hard nona. I was so mad that my ex chose to watch a particular show with some girl she only knew for few months instead of me even though I was a die-hard fan of the series. Like it's the feeling of not being able to sperg out about it with your favourite person combined with not spending that time experiencing it with them.

No. 1702360

I feel like I got screwed over so hard right now. I got injured a little over a week ago and was kinda laying low and recovering. I wasn't really doing much in uni, I only attended and just passed out as soon as I got home. I got all depressed for a little bit too after I got hit on by a creepy old dude at the bus stop, so I was just full couch potato mode. Then as soon as I recovered enough to clean the house and pick up a little I then get a sore throat and hope it's just nothing. Then the next day I wake up covered in sweat and have a high fever and am just totally out of it for five whole days. Then after I feel the fever just maybe starting to go down I go to the doctor for a doctor's note and she tells me I got some infection moving to my ear or something. Then my ear starts hurting like hell and I go back to laying down and feeling like shit. I've only just gotten better enough to go back to class and start taking care of things at home. I'm just upset that I missed a week and a half of regular life. I had to cancel two fun events coming up because I couldn't get out of bed. Now I've gotta tidy up all the loose ends left from when I was at home sick. I'm so upset this all happened, but I can't shake the feeling that I maybe could have handled the whole situation a lot better. I couldn't have predicted getting sick, but I think I could have at least averted the injury if I was a little bit more cautious, but I got too carried away. Then I was all moody while I was recovering which certainly didn't help things. I maybe could have handled life better while I was sick, but I was just too disoriented and confused to really do anything but lay down and cough loud enough to wake up my parents. It's been a hell of a time for me. Realistically, I'll probably be fine. Maybe this pain helped to build my character in the long run. It can't be undone now.

No. 1702364

File: 1695179423181.jpg (611.24 KB, 594x897, Ichihara.Yuuko.full.35741.jpg)

I can't stand living in such a loud and obnoxious house. So many loud little kids running around screaming whenever they're not at school. I already posted itt about my strict family situation and being trapped at home, so I there is nowhere else for me to go. I have 0 friends and I spend a lot of my time talking to people on Omegle. But I can't even truly talk to people there either. I have to worry about my loud ass family echoing in the background & making it hard to hear, my siblings bursting into my room (shared), and needing to talk quietly so my parents don't hear me. I've always held a grudge against my parents for having so many kids despite us being poor. It's not a good thing no matter how much they insist that it is God's will. I want to run far far away from here to just be alone for a least 24 hours. Sometimes, I feel so driven to murder them all, set them on fire in their sleep or something, but I would never do that.

I recently started to talk to someone, I think my very first friend since grade school. He isn't mean about my nervousness or horrible conversation skills and I don't think I have ever talked to anyone else about what I tell him. I'm scared the friendship will disappear just as it has started because I can't find anytime to talk to him since my family gets in the way. It might be stupid to care about some internet stranger this much but I seriously haven't spoken to anyone outside of my family and professors and doctor/dentist in maybe 3 years. This is a once in a lifetime chance and I can't loose them please.

No. 1702367

My left ear (and jaw) is in agonizing pain if I touch near the ear canal. No money to go to the doctor so I'm hoping that this goes away. Let's all manifest good health for each other nonna.

No. 1702380

Really annoyed I forgot my box of strawberries at the store. Don't even know if they'll honor that or something since it's a small store. I just feel stupid for not noticing when I left. I just get so stressed out at the counter and I feel like I have to rush. I really wanted those strawberries for breakfast tomorrow.

No. 1702384

>>1702380
Maybe call tomorrow morning and just explain it; maybe the cashiers realized it after you left

No. 1702401

File: 1695185370485.png (45.09 KB, 200x203, IMG_0480.png)

I will starve and eat ice, crackers and pepper packets just so my daughter never has to attend public school. It's a lost cause.

No. 1702402


No. 1702417

I want to delete the DMs I had with my ldr ex for ~closure~ but at the same time I feel like I should keep it in case I need to look back on things I should have worked on during the relationship so I can be a better partner for the next person. I don't want to forgot the lessons this past relationship gave me but I find myself reading back on these DMs, yearning the good times and relieving the worst moments, and it's like… I can't fully move on.

No. 1702427

Dumbass mommies be like "yes I'm making a great decision popping four subsequent kids out of my wounded rotting fetid black hole of a womb" and then beat the shit out of their toddler that they willingly planned to have, and tell her that she should've never born and give her siblings affection while making a point to ignore the little freak daughter and literal gaslighting of a fucking child telling her that the shit they did actually didn't happen right after it happened. Why is it ok for me to be fucked in the head and permanently screwed over and smacked with fists and wooden paddles but you all expect me to be nice and a well-adjusted adult? LMAO LMAO LMAO fuck you FUCK YOU you all (all of them) deserve to get hurt too if I deserved it, which I did deserve it, you all drilled it into my fucking head that I deserved it. So you all fucking deserve it too or it isn't fucking fair. You know it's coming, you know how I don't like hypocrites, you know it's only a matter of time until you get your comeuppance. LIE IN THE FUCKING GRAVE THAT YOU DUG and don't cry or boohoo about it when the shit you did to me comes right around to fuck you too

No. 1702435

My left boob felt weird when I was on my period last week and now it still feels weird in a way I can't describe. It doesn't hurt, but the way my clothes "cling" to it isn't the same as usual. I already got surgery to remove a tumor there last year and it wasn't cancerous but I'm at risk of cancer because of my great grandma and then my grandma dying of breast cancer so I'm panicking a little. I don't if I should get another appointment, I thought I could move on because of my doctor telling me there was no need for a follow up appointment after she told me the tumor wasn't cancerous (which was impossible to check before sugery because of how big it was). When I touch my breasts I don't notice anything in particular. I'm scared.

No. 1702437

>>1702427
I don't fucking get it either? If you decide to breed at least have the fucking decency to be nice to your child. Evaluate if you'll be a good parent and fix your mental issues. I have a retarded mother too, and same story with the parents favoring the younger child and giving the "freak daughter" absolutely nothing. I'm really glad I don't contact her anymore.
Also, I've just realised that I'm now past the age at which my mother decided to have me. Feels a bit weird, especially since I'm not planning to breed, ever. I hope this won't change, my genes are especially shitty (pretty hardcore mental issues and mild physical illnesses) and I'm a genuinely awful, traumatised, fucked-up person.

No. 1702444

>>1702437
>favoring the younger child
I never understood this because I was always treated like the afterthougth and my older brother is the golden child that could always piss and shit and get everything he wanted. Maybe it's because he's male so he's still favoured because of that. My mother would be verbally abusive to me even as a child but the fucker could call her whore and bitch and she would just let him do it.

No. 1702448

>>1702444
NTAYRT but are you me? Is your older brother also autistic?

No. 1702453

>>1702444
yes, probably because he's a moid. i am the ayrt and my younger brother who was favored since birth is an autistic moid.
if i talked back to my mom like he does, i'd get beaten. but he gets away with all of that.
he also gets away with eating quite a lot (he was obese when i last saw him), something my mom hated whenever i did it because vanity/beauty standards for women/competition reasons.

No. 1702455

>>1702437
>>1702453

First AYRT, i'm sorry you can understand the bullshit I'm dealing with. I think I just got unlucky. I'm lucky in that all my siblings are also female so no moid bullshit, but I'm the middle child so I got tossed aside like a piece of trash and neglected as soon as the 'cute new baby' came along and my older sister was already the favored child before I was born in the first place so it was simply worse after. It feels like I'm never good enough. I wasn't enough to get affection when I was the youngest and a cute baby, and I wasn't enough to get affection when I became the older sibling and started trying to make them proud. Its so painful

No. 1702456

>>1702453
I’m AYRT and holy shit I feel you. My mother would let my autistic older brother eat like absolute dogshit and he’s obese as hell but whenever I gained a couple pounds or ate a little bit like shit she’d be on my ASS, hee excuse being that she didn’t have full custody of him so he wasn’t around all the time. It’s amazing that I don’t have an ED.

No. 1702464

>>1702455
i'm glad you didn't have to deal with the XY sibling hell. sounds like you wouldn't really get good attention either way since you've described your mom acting in such a cruel and abusive way to you.
has any of your sisters come up with the same realisation of abuse as you? kinda sounds like none of them did (judging from your first post) though.
>>1702456
i remember her berating me for gaining a kilo and calling me all sorts of "fat/pig/hamplanet" type insults but she completely excuses the brother's food habits because "he's MALE, he NEEDS to be STRONG" (being a fat lard doesn't mean strength, you could've taken him to the fucking gym if you wanted him to actually be strong. don't you know that, you fat asshole who's struggled with weight for life?)
i can't say i didn't get an ED from this, sadly. maybe the genes played a role too

No. 1702502

File: 1695196682666.png (204.42 KB, 872x632, IMG_0567.png)

Pretty sure I have PCOS, not a single doubt about it. Going to a gyno on Thursday to start the confirmation process but gah damn. Hope and praying it’s the kind that makes me infertile.

No. 1702539

>>1702453
>my younger brother who was favored since birth is an autistic moid.
if i talked back to my mom like he does, i'd get beaten. but he gets away with all of that.
I think I would probably give a fake-heartfelt speech like "I know you love my brother more than me and wish I was more like him, so I'm REALLY going to do my best to act like him" and then do all shit he does and talk back exactly like he does and every time I'm called out I'd be like "ugh fine I can see it wasn't enough for you, so I'll try harder to be like him so you can be proud of me like you are of him" and just double down on it.

No. 1702542

>>1702539
knowing my mom that wouldn't work, she'd say some misogynistic shit like "but he's a BOY and you're a GIRL, you can't act like him!" or try to rationalise his behaviour by saying "he's autistic, don't try to be autistic, you're literally normal"

No. 1702573

File: 1695208367344.jpg (68.82 KB, 896x777, FBr06LwVcA46AVz.jpg)

>>1701772
Genuinely what the fuck is happening to this site? Why are there so many instances of anons admitting to torture animals? What are the chances of so many women doing it? Is it the moid/ tranny influx? I'm getting worried, things used to be deranged in a fun way but between the random vitriolic anons, crackheads, shotafags and cat/dog abusers it's getting disturbing hella fast

No. 1702589

>>1702573
The romanianon effect

No. 1702593

>>1702427
>>1702437
Nonna I will tell you something that I wish I knew when I was a kid. Don't feel bad for not being nice or good, and especially not for your parents' standards.
I was the nicest goodest bestest kid ever and it still wasn't good enough. There was no prize, no pat on the back, nothing. No acknowledgment from them that I was good whatsoever. Just mental illness, more beatings, higher expectations and people pleasing tendencies. It's like that in adulthood too, nobody will congratulate you for being nice, just do what you want within reason.

Might as well have taken advantage of the fact that I'll always be bad and really tested some boundaries since I'd be bad anyway, then just have it excused as silly child stuff. Sadly I didn't have a scheming bone in my body so that opportunity was lost.
Don't be me, go and fuck shit up.

No. 1702595

My doctor is on holiday but she didn't give me enough medication by accident and because it's only temporary I can't just get my prescription renewed and have to get it through another doctor that I can't reach right now I'm so stressed out

No. 1702598

idk if it's due to my period coming or new protein bars, but my god i cannot quit farting and they're deadly too

No. 1702602

>>1702595
I’m sorry anon, that’s so stressful, I hope it gets all sorted out soon. Is there any way your pharmacy can give you a 5 day emergency supply? they did that for me once when my dr screwed up.

No. 1702604

File: 1695215653517.jpg (31.86 KB, 612x408, istockphoto-1262417748-612x612…)

>spend teens being mentally ill and ugly
>spend early 20s being mentally ill, ugly and poor and stuck living with a sloppy moid, get only degree i could given the circumstances
>spend late 20s working, then go back to university because the industry and ex-moid made me suicidal
>turn 30
>poor but look cute, no longer mentally ill, happy
>"where baby???? where ring?????"
Damn bitch do I never get to enjoy the fruits of my labor or what?

No. 1702608

>>1702602
Thank you nonna, the lady on the phone acted annoyed and hasn't called back yet. I doubt they wouldn't give me a prescription for a few more days but it's nearing the weekend so it's all a bit hectic. It's a short term benzo prescription so I can't run to the pharmacy sadly. It'll be okay but right now I just feel like I'm going to throw up.

No. 1702611

the infighting in the pro-ana /snow/ thread is so embarrassing like we get it you like to laugh at pathetic women suffering from mental illness. go to therapy hon.

No. 1702636

>>1702611
I have to urge to call everyone in that thread fat. Just cause. It's such a pathetic board. They tend to leak everywhere on the site too.

No. 1702642

>>1700656
You won't see this, dear anon, but thank you for your response. I love Sylvanians and I cried when I saw it. I'm sure everything will be better soon.

No. 1702656

Im so upset right now over a problem i have and i asked my bf for help and he straight up said that he doesnt want to help me. Idek why im dating him at this point

No. 1702662

It's still 100 degrees and it's almost October. Fuck this

No. 1702664

Just watched the Fiona and Cake intro and now I'm crying a little because that could have been me and my cat but she died lol. I wish I still had my grumpy old lady and I could go through my quarter life crisis with her and we could eat mac n cheese together.

No. 1702672

>>1702604
Anon I'm sorry you can't just be left alone and enjoy being happy, don't mind them. I also had a very rocky teens and 20s and filled with mental illness holding me back so hearing that you feel more stable at 30 gives me a little hope.

No. 1702677

>>1702656
If he doesn't want to help you. He isn't worth your time

No. 1702684

I feel so left out by my own family. It really feels like I'm the maid who helps with chores and free therapy I guess. Like my mother, my father and my brother are the actual family, and I'm just here to be the laughing stock, the punching bag and the one that does the things other people are too lazy to do. Every "conversation" is them ranting about something but never actually asking or listening to my opinion, but if I need help with something they're completely emotionally unavailable to me. With each other they're able to have proper conversations and talk about serious things (and laugh at me behind my back when they're angry, I've heard them several times). Idk I know I could just ignore them and focus on myself but I literally don't have friends. I feel empty because I don't have a deep connection with anyone, and I feel unwanted and inferior no matter what. I'm always that dumb bitch that people laugh at and keep around as some sort of pet.

No. 1702702

>>1702684
Sheesh anon. I'm sorry. I've lived in a household like that.
There's nothing wrong with you. You don't deserve to be treated like a pet. I'm guessing your personality just doesn't mesh with the rest of the family, and they're self centered people that don't give you the love you deserve. Because having a family that accepts you, treats you like a human, is just the bare minimum. I'm really, really sorry you don't have that.
I hope that you find your own crowd, people that are like you, and will appreciate having you around, and make you feel understood. As much as you may feel like that it doesn't exist right now, it does. Your people are out there. You are not inferior, maybe different, but VERY worthy of love. Please always tell yourself that, write down things you like about yourself, validate your emotions, say NO to things that you don't want to do, and stop giving energy where it's unappreciated. I know one day, you will find your crowd, and get into a space where you can be yourself.

No. 1702719

>>1702677
he just broke up with me and im crying so hard

No. 1702721

>>1702719
NTA but I'm so fucking sorry you're feeling like this, you do deserve so much better though, anon.

No. 1702722

>>1702611
And those same posters are crying about 'misgendering' and "bigots" within the same thread. Making fun of non-milky mentally ill women is fine with them but using the wrong (correct) pronouns is crossing the line kek

No. 1702724

>>1702702
Thank you for the kind words anon. I do feel like what you say will never happen but I will make and effort to believe it will. Thank you for taking the time to write a nice reply, I really appreaciate it and it makes me feel a little less lonely. I hope you're doing good.

No. 1702728

I hate coming across random conspiracy theory shit because I have anxiety and it always makes me nervous. I just saw some stuff about how FEMA/FCC is doing a phone/cable alert emergency alert test on Oct. 4th, and apparently it's supposed to be something insidious, so of course now I'm anxious as shit. I know anons will probably be like "but anon, that's stupid!" but it's not about logic.

No. 1702729

>>1702721
thank you so much.. ill get over it eventually. it will take time but i will be strong

No. 1702738

Nonas, has it happened to you that you tried to talk to the girl who has 0 friends, because you feel bad, and then you end up realizing why she has 0 friends? Well that happened to me, except I dated her and tried to make her part of my group of friends. Worst mistake of my adult life. She alienated most of my friends, made up a bunch of lies about guys she slept with, made my best friend hate me, and overall lost my mental sanity over how much of a bad girlfriend she was. I feel so fucking stupid because I genuinely felt bad for her, and I still do. But then I start wondering if any of what she told me about herself was even true, and that she probably made it all up so that I would end up feeling sympathy for her. I feel like a fucking idiot, and I feel so alone since I was left with 0 friends. And there's also the fact that since I broke up with her she started saying a bunch of lies about me to other people. I just feel so alone and so fucking stupid, can't believe I ruined all my social circle over one single girl.

No. 1702751

File: 1695232128721.png (408.92 KB, 720x695, Cropped_Image_20230919_101116.…)

My special someone is terrifyed about me killing myself because he wants to grow old with me. But I always wanted to die when I'm 45 since I don't want to continue living past that due to already having had a bad life so far. This is a dream of mine since 15.

I'm in my late 20s and he's really scared of me putting an end line to my life because of how he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Maybe I'll live past 50 but then he'll die and leave me alone. Maybe I will have to take care of him and change his diapers when he's old and feeble just like my mom did with my dad when he died of kidney failure. Maybe I'll kill myself after he's gone. Maybe he'll get tired of me eventually and leave me.

I don't know anymore. I'm sad and scared. We had an argument about this yesterday and he almost broke up with me because he was tired (lack of sleep) and now I know things are better but I'm still feeling like shit. I'm not a good person.

No. 1702753

>>1702751
I would appreciate anyone's help with this btw even if it's just mean comments or someone scolding me.

No. 1702761

>>1702751
>Maybe I'll live past 50 but then he'll die and leave me alone.
You don't even know if that's true. Average lifespan is like 80 in the US
>I always wanted to die when I'm 45 since I don't want to continue living past that due to already having had a bad life so far.
You also don't know this, you can't predict if life will get worse.
I don't think you should focus on the very far future and try to take life one day at a time with your partner who loves you. If he's that scared that you'll hurt yourself then you have someone who cares about you and that's a lot more than others.

No. 1702764

File: 1695233452864.jpg (68.08 KB, 1202x890, qwerrtyu.jpg)

I got some devastating news that are going to negatively affect my life. At first I was hyperventilating but Im sorta calm now. I'm just phonescrolling while screaming internally. I have a heavy feeling in my chest and im unable to concentrate on anything but I'm not crying or showing any other signs of panic. I'm always calm for the first few hours when I recive bad news, but after a while I will have a complete meltdown so I guess it's only a matter of time before I start crying

I'm still kind of denial tbh. A part of me is convinced that I can fix this so there is no need to worry. I know ignoring it won't solve anything, but on the other hand there isn't anything left to do… it's too late to fix this now so panicking won't help me either. I feel so powerless right now and I have no idea how to process all this

No. 1702765

I know it has to be PMS because it always makes me want to kill myself but I can't do anything right now. I can't work on anything because it makes me cry but not working makes me think about how much time I'm wasting and have wasted and I also cry. I just want to get a little bit done before bed but I can't. It's usually difficult for me to do anything but today it's actually impossible. I don't want to do anything with my life anymore

No. 1702771

>>1702751
you need to chill out. if this is the main contention in your relationship this is bizarre. a lot can change in that time, this self-suicide pact due to fear of old age is understandable but you can deal with these issues when you get there. Your fears around health issues are not irrational but seem overblown. I wonder if you two are codependent, maybe breaking up would be good.
>But I always wanted to die when I'm 45 since I don't want to continue living past that due to already having had a bad life so far.
This confuses me honestly, if your life gets better than why kill yourself at an arbitrary age for things having once been worse?

No. 1702772

I hate when I get up and my vision goes white and I literally cannot see for a second. It happens like everyday, it just happened when I was kneeling to get up and I almost felt like I was gonna topple. I think it's from hunger (low blood sugar or pressure) cause I also feel very queasy, woozy and lightheaded if I'm in a very hot shower for too long, but I just had toast so idk.

No. 1702774

>>1702751
Why do you need our approval to live out your sadgurl bby dreams? If you've decided to die at 45, go ahead, nobody gives a shit except your pet moid. If he's codependent on an attention-seeking BPD-chan that's his problem.
>>1702764
What happened nona?

No. 1702789

>>1702765
You're miserable either way, you might as well be miserable and getting shit done. Start small, go as slow as you need to, but force yourself to work through it. That way, at least you'll have self-respect that you're not wasting time, and that you can power through moments of emotional instability. You're not going to feel any better by wasting time, that's a lie created by the current chemical state of your brain. Push through it girl.

No. 1702792

Earlier this summer there was an accident in the middle of the night where a guy cut an artery and was about to bleed out (to make a longer, dumb story short), and was calling out for help. I ran out when I realized someone was calling for help but since I live on the third floor with no elevator the people on the ground floor was already on helping him so I would just be in the way if I intervened so I backed off, but just witnessing the scene left me in a bit of a shock and honestly even now I sometimes get shivers from the memory of hearing him call for help.
I know a lot of people have been through worse or are in general tougher than me so they don't get shook by scenes like this, and I know it's okay to be a bit on the weaker side. But I still feel ridiculous in how I can't get over that part.

No. 1702795

>>1702772
Sounds like low blood pressure or have a blood pressure drop(eng?), I have very low blood pressure and occasionally even get dizzy from sitting up too fast from lying position. Pure salt usually helps to shock the system and get it to regular levels, not much is needed just a dab of the fingertip. And yes, you do feel a bit stupid but it helps.

No. 1702797

>>1702774
I don't have BPD though!
>>1702761
>>1702771
Thanks for the comments.

No. 1702816

File: 1695240585883.jpg (150.76 KB, 736x749, f981ea8a5f58f4a39714af35521e80…)

I have to take birth control to get my periods back, but what if I die from the long 82920108374782991919+ list of side effects? Can't remember what it was like last time I took them for a month. Either way I am going to act out so hard and get away with it all by blaming it on the evil pills.

No. 1702823

>>1702792
Lots of people go through worse but that doesn't mean that what you went through wasn't fucked up. Trauma isn't a competition. I hope you get better soon but the way you wrote it makes it sound like the helplessness you felt fucked you up more than the cut artery, you might want to avoid the news and anything else that makes you feel responsible but helpless for a while.

No. 1702826

>>1702772
Probably iron deficiency as well

No. 1702833

>>1702772
Go to the doctor or hospital to have your blood tested for deficiencies. I had severe iron anemia with only vague occasional exhaustion symptoms a few months prior. Your symptoms are far worse, make sure you get your blood tested.

No. 1702850

>>1702823
When I checked in with the neighbors I recognized at the scene the people that were cleaning up and helping the guy were less shaken by it all than us that were just witnessing it, so what you say might be very possible. I actually hesitated for a few seconds before running out because I was afraid of what I was going to see (my mind rushed through the worst case scenarios like him possibly having cut off a limb, since it was a thick glass door that he broke) but the thought of someone possibly lying on the ground with no help to come scared me even more, and my stomach turned when I first saw the huge amount of blood before my eyes trailed it to the source. Because what if I had really been the one to run out to help him? Had I been able to do anything or just be shocked? I know it's useless to dwell on it, I usually don't, so I guess this is kind of a stream of consciousness now that I am thinking about it

No. 1702863

>>1702833
>Go to the doctor or hospital
I'm not gonna do all that honestly. If I start passing out or something I'll consider it. I have to go to the doctor all the time for various reasons…sick of it.

No. 1702865

>>1702863
Kek then suffer you weirdo.

No. 1702866

>>1702865
Why are you offended?

No. 1702867

File: 1695244215735.png (2.19 MB, 1080x1318, IMG_5245.png)

>Sperging about how much you hate white women
>Pewdiepie fan
Yeah, okay

No. 1702871

I gave my landlord the rent check on the first week of the month. They still haven't cashed it. Today I got an auto-debit from some fucking streaming service I forgot about. So now I'm $10 short in my checking account what I wrote on the check. $10, that's it, and if my landlord decides on a whim to cash it before Friday, it will bounce, I will look like an asshole, and I will be mad at the universe.

but god dammit, I asked the landlord when they usually cash their rent checks LAST WEEK, and they said "oh yeah, I just put it in the bank" I thought that meant they were cashing it that same day. No, I guess the bank is sitting on it too.

Fuck. please don't cash it until Friday!

No. 1702873

>>1702850
I'm sorry you have to witness that, it's completely normal to feel traumatised. I hope the guy is recovering well.

You shouldn't feel guilty for "not helping". You made sure at the time he was being assisted and, right after that, you started to panic, which is totally fine and normal in a situation like that.

If you had been alone or the only one that could help him, you would have done that, I can assure you that. We have more strength than what we think we have.

So don't feel ashamed or worried because you would have been able to help if needed.

Maybe you can talk to the neighbours that were that night and ask them if they need something, they are probably still thinking about the accident. Also, it will make you feel good to help someone else, even if it is just a little.

Take care nonna!

No. 1702875

>>1702867
when mommy tells you to get off the xbox and do the dishes for once

No. 1702881

>>1702875
They’re a woman so it’s even more embarrassing

No. 1702882

Got touched on the train. Hope that roach got run over by a car the second he stepped out of the station.

No. 1702885

>>1702871
I’m sorry, nonna. I’ve been there many times before. If this is the first time that’s happened, you can lie and say that your bank didn’t process it correctly.

When my rent check bounced, it was the only time that happened. My landlord didn’t even notice it right away. I called the bank to see if they could process it again, and they told me they couldn’t. They mentioned something about how they try to process the check twice, just in case the first attempt doesn’t work. Something about how they didn’t do that this time for some reason, it was only processed once. I told my landlord that and he believed me, cos I was never late or anything before.

If it hasn’t happened before, I wouldn’t worry too much about it.

No. 1702903

>>1702863
Mild dizzy spells are normal if your blood pressure is lower. I get them too, especially when I'm tired or hungry. I get up, stop seeing for a bit and gave to kneel down. My blood pressure is just a bit lower, it's not even out of the normal range plus my iron levels are good. I recommended buying a supplement though, most people lack enough iron, especially women because of menstruation.
Only my vision goes black, not white. If you start fainting or if it gets worse or way too frequent you should get it checked.

No. 1702905

>>1702816
Same sister, just started mine today after half a year of no periods. Wishing you a blood clot and pulmonary embolism-free life, hope it all goes well.

No. 1702908

File: 1695248688531.jpg (37.3 KB, 462x480, EHn3Q2UUEAE7Bbn.jpg)

All of 2023 has been one big joker moment for me

No. 1702914

>>1702871
Next time just send in a money order sweet nonna. Also, check your lease- sometimes there is a bounce check fee. I do office management/book keeping for a local landlord and he just charges the bounce check fee the bank gives him.
Hope your finances get sorted, and if anything else just clear communication with the landlord helps.

No. 1702917

>>1702751
I think it's romantic that he wants to grow old with you anon. Don't think about things too hard, just take it one day at a time. When you reach 45 you could very well feel differently. As long as you two take care of each other you can have a long and happy life together. Life sucks majorly, and that's why we should stop and appreciate the tiny things that give us fleeting moments of joy, like our loved ones. You never know what the future will hold really, life is too unpredictable to make a plan.

No. 1702921

>>1702789
Nayrt but I needed this, thanks anon. I'm depressed and miserable and wish I was dead every day, but I'm still alive and I have shit to do. I'll just try to get whatever I can done and hopefully these baby steps will bring a better tomorrow eventually. I hate how gradual change for the better is, I'm impatient.

No. 1702952

>You should just stop feeling embarrassed by it
I fucking hate when my mom says this when I talk about my feelings about my mental health illness issues. It's frustrating having emotionally constipated parents especially with a father who thinks you can literally solve everything with a fucking smile and burying any feelings that aren't "positive". Can't talk about any negative feelings because that means you aren't trying hard enough. It's extremely hypocritical because my mom is allowed to be angry along with having tantrums (which include slamming doors, yelling, and when I was a young teen threatening to hit me by raising her hand above her head and leaning in towards me). I hate it so much because bottling my feelings is what lead to the self destructive things I've done. I don't have money for a therapist and the one I had for a short time just focused on me being to talk/function because I just shut down after trying to kill myself. I was able to get a therapist because I was on school insurance which ended when I left.

No. 1702956

not rly a vent mostly just a retarded pickme post but i fucking hate how my bf has fucked the ugliest most weird looking women not even just because they’re fat but they are shaped so strangely they’re shaped the way that my brain tells me i’m shaped and it drives me insane. how could he do this how could he have so many ugly ex girlfriends he’s not even ugly and he has a big dick i don’t get it

No. 1703007

I thought my period wasn’t too bad for the last two days but today the headaches and abdominal pain hit like a truck. I hope I can sleep it away but tomorrow’s not looking good

No. 1703038

Every man at my uni is so ugly nonnies where do I find a hot boyfriend…

No. 1703050

>>1703038
I went to a college full of hot gothy athletes in the PNW then transfered to a better college in the Midwest but it's filled with uggos. Midwestern moids are so fucking ugly. I could've easily fucked a bunch of them too

No. 1703063

I saw a snippet of one of Dave Portnoy's sex tapes by accident and I wish I could wash my brain of it. Men are the most monstrous beings ever and we have to walk around like they're God's gift to us all.

No. 1703066

File: 1695258609336.jpeg (267.21 KB, 1920x1080, IMG_0567.jpeg)

Okay, bitch.

No. 1703071

I feel like lolcow is making me a more negative person tbh, but I can’t leave here cause I’m attached to it. I can probably just stay away from the gossip boards, but I don’t know, I feel like maybe the way nonnas talk to each other here is more genuine than other places. I talk about my eating disorder or other issues on discord, I get “noooo nonna you’re so pretty you don’t have to do thaaat” but I talk about it here and I get “don’t be a fuckin retard and eat a bagel” the second one just clicks better. People are saying I’ve become more blunt, angry, and even misandrist these past years, and the only thing that’s changed is that I used to be a normie and now I browse here. Sorry if this makes no sense

No. 1703072

>>1703071
Well to be honest, being blunt and misandrist are good traits to have.

No. 1703076

File: 1695260700630.jpg (17.51 KB, 400x400, 56dcc5f63b7bbca85d318ea71bb1fc…)

Met a cute moid at a show. I started texting with him and everything had been great. He seemed like a sweet laid-back dude. Except the other day i asked him what he was up to and he said "i just took a shit" and i was so taken aback by it. What the fuck? We hadn't even been talking for a week straight and he just said that? No class. I started to kind of back off from him and talk to him a bit less. Then today he was like "i need to tell you a story". And he tells me a story about a childhood friend he had whose entire room was covered in animal feces, because he let his reptiles loose in his room and didn't clean up after them. I was so confused as to why he was sharing this story. Why are men like this? Why can't they just be fucking normal? The bar is literally in hell and yet… why do some of them just always bring up flatulence and excrements? You are 23 years old and act like this? Depraved.

No. 1703078

why does everyone hate me so much

No. 1703079

I hate being a fucking autist and a pushover, I don’t know what to do, I’m so fucking tired of having to beg for simple services, of getting scammed and of being seen as less than a human.
I just want to send my fucking papers to the university so I can fucking graduate already, I won’t be more of a human anyways, but at least I will have a piece of paper that says that I cam read and that I’m not entirely retarded.
Like, I’m always getting ignored when I’m interested in spending my money for a service, or when I want to ask someone a question about anything.
Is it because I’m ugly? Or maybe I’m too fat to be asking questions? I just wish I could have a business or something so I didn’t have to depend on anyone, so I could instead be the person that everyone wants to ask questions to, instead of begging for a crumb of information.
And it’s even more infuriating this whole thing because everyone just sees me as a lesser being, I can feel it in my bones, idk if it’s because I don’t look like an European painting or if maybe I should start showing more the money I have.
So now I will have to go back to my highschool and yet again beg for them to sign my fucking copies of my bachelor’s degree and my grades, because I need them to do this shit before this fucking friday or I may not be able to fucking graduate this year, which means I would have to wait even longer to get a fucking job because the retards of this country think that we have fucking structures, no bitch, this shit is all about connections, every country is all about somehow talking to some other retard that somehow has power over other retards.
I just want to get a job or fucking die.

No. 1703086

File: 1695263236902.gif (3.39 MB, 614x640, 929.gif)

my ass is going to get doxxed if troons find out ive written and drawn a effeminate man who outright says he isnt a woman but a man whos just girly.a full on arc with him seeing and saying how ugly he looks like a woman and isnt comfortable with the ideology and shows how the troon community reacts when he outright tells them he isnt a woman ,i have some comebacks prepared if they do come for my ass like this is exploring le gender and shit and the context of the story matters or you are being non binary phobic!! thank fully the chapter is obscure so ive hidden it behind a veil of exploring the gender shit and not outright saying troons will never be women, i wish there were more ways to hide terf ideologies without me being fearful what the coommoids will do to ruin me

No. 1703090

god i ate dairy while on cipro and i think it stopped working i’m such a fucking retard i hate myself

No. 1703094

>>1703090
don't eat dairyshit next time. or don't eat it ever again (best case scenario)

No. 1703103

>>1703086
Stayed based. I'm so sad this is the time line we're in. I was online during the early 2000s and bishonen or pretty boys were huge. No one ever questioned them not being man. none of this tranny shit. they were just pretty adult men. Some of them really feminine, but never women. I want to go back.

No. 1703105

File: 1695266761972.jpg (15.74 KB, 436x704, IMG_4615.JPG)

why is there no new shayna shit i work full time and everyone hates me my old "friends" only pity i havent had sex in 2 years and im never gonna be in a relationship again cause im so unlovable and ugly and i dont even get to read shayposting after being out for 12 hours???????? whats the fucking point then??? cant i have ANYTHING? also fuck autism why THE FUCK would my parents have a baby at 40+ years old my god man i never had a fucking chance

No. 1703135

Fuck kckkckckckkckc I have many regrets about how I’ve been treating my body my skin is shitty and my beautiful face features are buried in fat. I keep relapsing on shitty behavior
I have no discipline.
I’m stupid

No. 1703139

>>1703135
I just love consuming media pf beautiful women, and then I look in the reflection and there I am with my shitty skin. How could I let it happen to myself

No. 1703148

I live in the same neighborhood as someone who assaulted me in public. Actually about two streets down. Every time I see her it ruins my day, I just start crying. I don’t know what to do.

No. 1703149

what I look like watching my non mentally unwell friends progress through life way ahead of me
why did I have to be this way

No. 1703154

i hate my job enough i think im gonna have a go at selling furry art or gay furry shit. im sorry for selling out to coomers but im also sick of my boss putting me down then acting like she did nothing wrong to everyone else.

No. 1703177

File: 1695274696111.jpeg (67.25 KB, 700x623, 1535375510286.jpeg)

I kinda have a chubby stomach even though I'm not overweight. I've lost like 10 lbs trying to get rid of it and all of the weight came off my butt. I still have the same round stomach but my ass is GONE

No. 1703184

>>1703177
Just keep losing. When you're in the process of losing or gaining weight sometimes you'll lose it in an unflattering way at first before you eventually lose your desired weight

No. 1703188

File: 1695275464361.png (736.03 KB, 1170x1033, why-cant-o-fucking-cry-v0-xj6z…)

I kinda just want to die doe

No. 1703194

I wish I went down a different path in high school. I would've ended up being a well-known cosplay weeb with a successful indie fashion brand and possibly a band member and/or content creator, maybe even successful indie game dev - instead of whatever the fuck failed attempt at being "normal" I am now. my biggest mistake is caring too much about what people thought of me back then. yet most of those same people I'll never see again after high school ended up being total losers anyways. the bullying didn't matter since now they're all bigger losers than I could ever be if I tried. it doesn't help that my parents and family are batshit crazy saboteurs, I should've ignored their retardation and focused on my (silly at the time yet now super profitable) hobbies.

No. 1703195

>>1703194
Respectfully. You would not have been those things. The grass is always greener when you're daydreaming about niche hobbies you most definitely would not hit gold on. The more realistic outcome would be that you spent all your money on weebshit, if you had the chance to be any of those things you would have. Your life is fine.

No. 1703208

>>1703195
the main issue I have is ditching people that would've been good friends with me over druggie assholes that used me, plus listening to the shitty sabotaging advice my unhinged spiteful family gave me that led me nowhere. the cosplay weebs I should've stayed friends with are all pretty happy and successful now. versus my former "friends" who are wastes of oxygen that only drained away my time and happiness and ditched me in the end. maybe I wouldn't hit gold on those silly hobbies but I'd at least be more advanced in skills I want to master and doing something I enjoy rather than trying to look good for people who don't care if I'm laying dead in a ditch

No. 1703209

>>1703177
wish i was you, i'm losing weight in my stomach area but my ass is still fat as fuck and utterly hideous. i look completely ridiculous, can't wait to lose it too

No. 1703217

>>1703208
You can pick up those things again if they truly mean something to you. I don't think it's good at all to wallow in an idea of what could have been if x or y didn't happen, you cant change that and the maladaptive daydreaming will only make you sadder and disconnect you from your life further. You haven't aged out of being allowed to enjoy things, I think its a shame that we are currently taught that our interests don't matter unless we try to monetize them.

No. 1703221

I fucking hate men and their lust and porn and entitlement
I'm just fucking disgusted by men at this point
Is it really too much to ask for that a man not jerk his dick to pixels on a screen depicting rape and abuse? How is that seen as normal today? You're supposed to prostrate yourself in front of the rare man who doesn't watch porn and act like he's a king for not touching his penis to emulated child porn? IT'S THE BARE FUCKING MINIMUM
I can't fight all other women for the few scraps that pretend to be somewhat decent and human, it isn't worth it. The fact that I have to be extremely thankful if I do find a man who hasn't ruined himself forever with nasty fetishes disgusts me

No. 1703248

>>1703217
>I think its a shame that we are currently taught that our interests don't matter unless we try to monetize them
thanks nona I think this really resonated with me, it feels like most of the people I admire with similar hobbies lately are monetizing them rather than participating for the sake of enjoyment which makes me have a similar mindset to them. the only problem is I'm currently a poorfag so that makes it hard to participate in these hobbies for personal enjoyment rather than some financial gain. really I just wish I had a good career with some work-life balance so I could spend money on doing stuff I enjoy without needing to make any back in return.

No. 1703265

I just got the info that I flunked all three of my exams even though I studied and I can only retake them once which is already in a month and if I don't make it I'll get fired and have to drop out. I fucking hate my life and wish I was dead because I am too stupid for anything why can't I be smarter and a different person. I am already in my mid 20s and a complete failure.

No. 1703271

>>1703265
There is still hope anon. You can do it.

No. 1703302

Landlord suddenly sent an email saying she would like to 'pop in' whenever it suits us. We've been living here for two months and I really fucking hope she does not want to raise the rent

No. 1703357

It's not the first time I've written about him.

No. 1703394

File: 1695309321177.jpeg (159.92 KB, 904x1024, IMG_5991.jpeg)

We drank way too much with my friend and I througly fondled her tits at the club (she asked me to). Good lord I need to stop drinking, this is so embarrassing. Pretty sure people we know saw it too.

No. 1703403

File: 1695311733251.jpeg (92.42 KB, 500x664, i see you.jpeg)

my upstairs neighbors are assholes so i pretended to be an FCC agent "over the phone" and hearing them move everything and start whispering is cracking me up. "i have all the tax information!!!"i almost feel bad but they suck they just whispered "OH SHE IS A REAL FCC AGENT" and i said "I AM" lmaoooooooo

No. 1703409

File: 1695312647377.gif (372.38 KB, 640x640, 3C6BE26A-1AC9-4E81-A128-E0E258…)

Has anyone here cured vaginismus on your own? Literally one finger is uncomfortable I hate this I just want to be normal.

No. 1703410

>>1703403
you mean FTC right? either way enjoy your time in jail (if this wasn't a larp)

No. 1703418

>>1703403
Amber Lynn , I am reporting you

No. 1703434

>>1703409
read the camera my mother gave me by susanna kaysen

No. 1703440

I love my olive skin i really do but it's such a pain in the ass to find makeup that makes my complexion really shine. Search for foundation and concealer that's a proper warm-neutral or just neutral frankly i don't even know if i lean more warm or cool toned, blush that's too pink makes my skin look greyish and blush that's too warm makes me look like a clown, finding a proper MLBB lip gloss or lipstick is like finding a needle in a haystack and the bronzers never feel quite right on my skin. I want to try the rare beauty warm wishes bronzer on the bright side shade cause it seems more neutral rather than fucking orange. It's tiring cause you can be a bit more versatile and play with more shades from both warm and cool toned makeup but at the same time everything feels kinda off

No. 1703443

>mention I want to upgrade my GPU
Of course I immediately get attacked by 2 scrotes because wanting to upgrade a PC I built 3 years ago with my own money is bad because 'I don't need to'. I settled for this GPU because the one I wanted at the time was impossible to get due to rampant scalping. I wish blocking people on Discord just hid their messages entirely, it sucks that they're in the main server I talk in. Never had to use this feature before.

No. 1703444

File: 1695316276676.jpg (57.84 KB, 640x1136, cat (3).jpg)

Someone who I don't want to speak to but I have to just contacted me.

No. 1703452

How are men so weak and stupid? My dad recommended I listen to a podcast where the host says women shouldn’t have the right to vote and that they’re “childlike”. He said men built everything to which I have to wonder if he thinks women would just sit in the dirt eating their own shit if not for men liberating them from their own stupidity? I told him and women birthed men, we literally sacrifice our bodies so they can exist. The funniest part is that he’s railing against potential laws that would see him (in his mind) stripped of his right to vote, make money and own property because he’s white… in the same sentence he was saying that this podcast was amazing because it advocated for women to lose their rights. Anyway I’m thinking next time I’m just going to go all in with the other side of that racism and argue that “well akshully whites are predisposed to colonization and shouldn’t have the right to own things because when we do we think it suddenly means we own everything including people and we just can’t help ourselves, we’re just inherently flawed like that so of course le blackman should run things for us, we’re too stupid to do it ourselves!” See how he likes it. Fucking idiot.

No. 1703455

i was combing through my message archive on facebook and came across my old conversations with my ex from like 2016. i reconnected with him a few months ago but its clear he's only interested in keeping conversations strictly sexual now and i'm not so we don't really talk much, just send each other the odd snapchat. reading the old conversation made me sad because we had really good friendly talks and he was actually sweet to me and i miss that. sighhhhhhhhhh

No. 1703470

Someone I used to be friends with is posting pictures all over her instagram with 16 year olds even though she's almost 20. Nonnies what am I supposed to think? It's fucking creepy.

No. 1703477

>>1703470
like random 16 yr olds? are you sure they're not her siblings or anything?

No. 1703485

>>1703470
She could know them socially or through family… if it was flirty it would be a cause for concern.

No. 1703487

>>1703477
Yeah, she's an only child. I don't know if it's creepy per se but I think it's really weird.
>>1703485
It's just pictures at the mall and regular stuff but I avoid people younger than me like the plague, I don't know anyone who doesn't. I mean they're still in school and she's graduated college already, what do they even talk about? I probably shouldn't worry, if it was sketchy she wouldn't be making it obvious.

No. 1703488

my bf broke up with me and i cant stop crying and im just hoping that he comes back to me

No. 1703490

I wish I could go outdoors and exist without being observed. I'm over 30 now, time to be "invisible" as the moids claim. I'm dead serious I eagerly await the day no male outside wants to talk to me, but something tells me that day will never come and I've been lied to. Not once in my life have I interacted with a public moid and come out of it thinking "oh that was nice/cute/that made my day!". No matter their age or looks or what they have to say. They're worthless. Less than worthless.

Men. I see them intensely staring in my peripheral vision when I'm out walking and I can tell if I glance in their direction for a millisecond they'll take it as an invite. Do they think the women they stare at can't see them? Dipshits. Absolute freaks. Happens maybe once an hour when I'm out. I was cycling once and a guy came and cycled beside me to say hello. Like what the fuck do you want? What are you expecting? One started talking to me as I was walking by, stood and stared for a good 50 metres before I passed by him too. Asked hello, how are you, where are you from? Before I gestured emphatically at the earbud I pulled out to hear him, I'm listening to music why do you feel entitled to even a second of my time??

And I know this isn't because I'm good looking or anything, it's literally just because I'm alone. And what the fuck is a woman doing on her own? No way she's just enjoying doing her own thing. Nah, that won't do. She needs company huh? Most of the time when i'm immediately hostile they fuck off, but it's so shit to constantly be on defence when I just want to enjoy the outdoors.

No. 1703493

File: 1695319595867.jpeg (67.59 KB, 680x624, IMG_5230.jpeg)

both shrinks i tried told me to "just research my background" when i was a self hating teen of mixed races because it just made me hate my other side even more than i already did before reading up on it. even now the effects of doing that i still feel all because of that garbage ass advice and i don't even like the act of hating oneself i think it's one of the most pathetic things you can do in adult age it makes me feel disgusted with myself because it's not something anyone can change, it's childish to pout about it and it's even worse if it starts moving towards hating entire groups of people due to deep insecurity which i will never ever do. but ugh i just don't like my other side. and i wish i could separate myself from it completely but the irony is that i ONLY look like i'm from the side i don't like belonging to. it's not about my features or looks, i honestly don't think i'm ugly due to my race or even really that unattractive at all, it's more of the connotations and knowing all the bad things people are attributing to me by looks alone. i don't really know if i would feel better if all fetishizers just dropped dead or disappeared off the face of the earth. i'm afraid i'll just be permanently feeling out of place because even when i go there i stick out like a sore thumb and the people isolate and exclude me even more the second they were aware of my birth kek. it seems i will be stuck being this pathetic for life but hopefully something will just click in my mind in the future and i won't be able to even give a fuck anymore. it's not that serious but it really, really feels like it is sometimes.

No. 1703496

I think I have a case to report my ex to the police. I have suspicions he has been looking at illegal porn throughout our relationship, even before we met. He's not so much of a social media type person, but his mind is so engulfed in Internet activity, I suspect his long showers and wanting to be alone is because he's on suspicious onion sites and other obscure sites to see what can get through legalities (this is what I've found, ""legal"" AI generated stuff). However, if I present this case now, I have a risk of myself being harmed. He's still on my lease. I want to speak to his exes to see if I can build a stronger case, if they were aware of anything illegal from him, but they've been known to try to harass him and people he knows when they find out something relating to him, so I don't want his exes impulse to harm me either before this case is reported. I don't know what I should do except wait until the rest of my lease is up and I move to an apartment and he doesn't know the address. Is this the safest way? I wouldn't trust the law to protect me either, they can easily give him a slap on the wrist, so that's why I'm hesitating bringing this forward now.

No. 1703503

>>1703496
You should call a free legal aid service in your area before you contact exs… one of them may confront the guy directly before hes moved out

No. 1703510

File: 1695321484631.jpg (20.23 KB, 345x253, 1454448465925.jpg)

We are 4 people in this group assignment, so HOW THE FUCK did I end up doing 75% of the work?

No. 1703513

>>1703510
If you don't need it to be approved, you could just say fuck it and not do anything.

No. 1703514

>>1703493
Sorry to hear that nonny. I can relate since I'm half-Romani. People really don't like them and I've heard really, really nasty things like gypsies should be gassed, aren't people, it's in their culture to beg on the street and steal (it isn't and it's not just one culture). I mostly pass as white except when I tan, I tan really deeply and look like a completely different person. I just lie about being Italian kek. It's not worth being a "good example" because you'll catch abuse anyway and having to listen to racist bullshit gets to you after some time. Luckily I haven't dealt with fetishization at all, but it's mostly because people think they (we?) are disgusting so I also feel ugly.
>it's more of the connotations and knowing all the bad things people are attributing to me by looks alone
Felt that.

No. 1703533

>>1703513
We just started this education and this is the first graded assignment, so I can't.

No. 1703545

>>1703510
didn't do a good job delegating tasks for everyone to do, or you are a doormat and others figured out how to get you to do all the work.

No. 1703580

>>1703545
It was delegated evenly, however there was one part we had to finish together before everyone did their own parts for the project and I tried several times to get them to focus on that instead of zoning in on theirs immediately to the point of almost nagging so I pretty much had no choice in doing it myself. One went MIA the second day (haven't even seen him in class so I wonder if he dropped out without saying anything), one sucks at communicating no matter what we try and has barely been in class during the project and doesn't respond when we ask for updates. The third one I actually give credit to for actually communicating actively and really trying but visibly struggling, been giving him some pointers when he asks for help but in the end he has to learn on his own if he is going to get anything out of this.
Idk what else I could have done except trying to figure out where the other two live and drag them out by their hair, and I refuse to hand in a half-finished project and have my grades suffer just because I ended up with retards this time. At least the teacher will be able to tell which parts are mine.

No. 1703595

I JUST FOUND OUT MY SISTER WHO STOLE AND WASTED ALL OUR FAMILY MONEY HAD ME AS LIVING WITH HER THIS WHOLE TIME TO GET FOOD AND HEALTH BENEFITS! FUCK YOU! I HATE YOU SO MUCH!! I COULDVE HAD A HOUSE OR TOWNHOUSE INSTEAD OF LIVING PAY CHECK TO PAYCHECK! NOW I HAVE TO REDO MY WHOLE FOOD APPLICATION SO I CAN EAT!!

No. 1703612

I’m probably gonna be called stupid by childfree anons who hate moms but I’m coparenting with my ex husband and he got our 6 year old a tablet and when ever he’s over there it seems like all he does is sit him on the tablet. I just wanna break down because we discussed this before our kid was born and all throughout his life but here he recently gets our son a tablet. I don’t know what to do. Nobody listens to me I legitimately want to kill myself right now.

No. 1703616

>>1703493
yea it is stupid to self hate for something that you literally have zero control over just because of how others will stereotype you. You're a woman, aren't you? Aren't we already faced with all sorts of ~connotations~ for being a woman? Do you hate being a woman as much as you hate your background? If no, then why is it any different from your ethnicity? If yes, that's super depressing but at least consistent.

No. 1703620

File: 1695331142961.jpeg (39.47 KB, 680x455, IMG_8012.jpeg)

I was always destined to be a nun. tfw born in the wrong era

No. 1703621

>>1703503
Yeah that's what I'm thinking. He's already moved out but he still has the key. In my head, he won't want to come back, but if something concerning shit he's guilty of and his ex goes to him about it, he'll know I told them the information and he knows I still live there.

No. 1703624

>>1703620
Lol same nonna, I'm not religious but I would have loved to be some kind of beekeeping nun in a secluded abbey.

No. 1703629

Yeah no. I’m done performing femininity. I’m too autistic for it and suck at it and even tho once in a blue moon i manage to be properly feminine i lose it again all over anyway. I don’t want to spend my hard earned money on fashion and make up. People didn’t like me back then when I didn’t perform femininity and they don’t really like me now. So why bother. Fuck it.

No. 1703630

>>1703620
me but i wish i was a monk in a monastery

No. 1703659

File: 1695334401700.jpg (Spoiler Image, 84.9 KB, 570x575, arentinstrumentsfun.jpg)

>>1703630
same nonna same they seem like they had fun being manuscript illumination trolls (nsfl monk art under spoiler)

No. 1703679

>>1703620
Its not to late, there are stil abbeys around

No. 1703686

>man thinks I'm 19-21 and talks to me a lot
>gradually loses interest after he finds out my actual age (late 20s)
Why do I only attrack those men? Are ALL MEN like this?

No. 1703692

I’m with a new guy who’s wonderful and takes good care of me. It makes me fucking cringe at my loser of an ex who was like 8 years older than me but was cheap and made me split the bill on dates. Balding ugly ass had no future and I let him have access to me, because I didn’t know better. Know your worth ladies.

No. 1703693

>>1703692
suspicious horse.jpg

No. 1703695

>>1703686
No, just the ones who want to manipulate someone younger/more naive. Sadly that’s a pretty large number but there are normie men who aren’t like that.

No. 1703697

my 16 year old brother came out as a transgender girl and I want to die. He's been groomed online. Everyone in my family is a fucking lunatic and are of course supporting it 100%. If I don't play along, I may lose contact with him. I'am completely devastated and so afraid for him. I don't know what to do. Can anyone supply resources and what to do and what to say to him. How to talk him out of this and get more information about WHY and WHERE and HOW this is happening.

No. 1703701

>>1703697
It's definitely the Internet and discord groomers. Your parents should be ashamed of themselves.

No. 1703702

>>1703510
Just tell your professor when you turn in the work. Expose them.

No. 1703704

>>1703697
Please tell me he’s HSTS and not a AGP. I’m so sorry anon sending you virtual hugs.

No. 1703706

>>1703701
you don't know how bad I wanna punch my BPD mum in the face. He's spent the last 7 years in his room, day in and day out. free reign on the computer. she couldn't care less what he does. as long as she get's to drink and do whatever she wants. He has 0 friends irl because my mum took him out of school to spite another family member. My mum says he has "friends online" so it doesn't matter! he has friends!

I hope she dies.

>>1703704
I'm so scared, I don't know.

No. 1703724

File: 1695338625189.jpg (46.21 KB, 969x724, bfb7aea07bcb2b99ed0b0e697fc03a…)

>>1703697
idk what to tell you cause my family knows i am hardcore against tranny shit. told my younger brother idc if he turns out gay but if he turns out tranny we are cutting him out. his friends laugh at tranny memes and all find them gross. maybe you should start with texting shit like this pic.

No. 1703783

>>1703724
Do any of you remember there being erasers that looked like this as kids? That looked scrumptious and delicious

No. 1703786

>>1703410
i have the inmates right now

No. 1703787

File: 1695341827186.jpg (94.87 KB, 1000x1000, New-2-in-1-Nail-Drill-Machine-…)

I got one of these (electric nail file and lamp) and it's super cute but it takes so long to charge, doesn't stay full for long, and loses battery even while it's not in use. Grrrr. But it was free so I really cannot complain.

No. 1703817

File: 1695344199398.gif (970.04 KB, 275x275, 1670798596372.gif)

>walking down the stairs
>lights are turned off so i cant see very well
>notice tiny dark smudge at the bottom of the stairs
>poke it with my slipper (thank god i wasnt barefoot)
>it makes a wet squishing sound
>turn on lights
>its mushy cat shit
>its on my slipper now
>smell finally hits me
>mfw

sometimes i regret having cats

No. 1703856

This place is not long for this world. I've never seen it so slow. Latest posts in G are 4 hours old, even the shayna thread has only has 2 posts in the past 2 days. I try to do my part in keeping things alive but I think it's past the point of no return at this point, it just keeps slowing down. I'm pretty upset because there is no where else to go that replaces what we had here. Sure the cows are fun but the once bustling community of anonymous women was this place's value.

No. 1703863

>>1703856
God damn it Bobby there are no women I made them up

No. 1703864

>>1703410
nobody would ever larp on an imageboard

No. 1703867

>>1703863
It's 'got dang' it, Hank doesn't say 'goddamn'

No. 1703870

>>1703867
thank you autism

No. 1703871

File: 1695346770252.png (50.33 KB, 640x645, EOlA-73XUAs8BU7-753007040.png)

>>1703870
'welcome

No. 1703872

File: 1695346975377.jpg (117.43 KB, 419x411, istockphoto-598794802-170667a.…)

>>1703856
It's slowed down like this before when moderation went to shit like it has recently. A bunch of new farmhands went full retard with redtexts and pissed off a lot of nonnas. They'll likely come back in time once the hands are suspected of fucking off or at least being better trained. I saw some pretty retarded redtexts myself and don't blame them. Me? I'll go down with the ship. I'm here forever.

No. 1703891

>>1703867
>>1703870
>>1703871
I LOLed at this interaction

No. 1703906

Reading the “News Stories that Fuck with You” is bleak man. Especially the ones where sons murder female relatives, moms get me the worst.

No. 1703915

>>1703906
Being a “boymom” is a syndrome women develop to cope with the reality that they incubated, birthed, and raised a deadly parasite

No. 1703917

i do have a vent. in fact i had a miscarriage this summer from stress and my boyfriend didn't give a fuck and was mostly relieved and he said he would have resented me if i kept it and im angwie

No. 1703925

>>1703917
the more i think about how nightmarish my summer was the more i have to vent about. i was constantly anxious, on my feet traveling, it was way too hot, i was stressed from school and "work", constant mood swings from hormones and THEN MY SCROTE IS LIKE WHINY BECAUSE IM NOT HAPPY ALL THE TIME and everything kept going wrong missing planes missing bus missing train, my phone got stolen, my email was deleted like i'm shocked i didn't combust

No. 1703930

>>1703917
And you’re still with him? Fucking ridiculous how women just accept this treatment and let the male continue to use their body for sex or domestic labor.
My vent is I can’t relate to other women because of this pattern specifically. They make their lives revolve around a man who doesn’t even care about them past what she can do for him. I can’t relate to it and it actively disgusts me and it’s absolutely nearly every woman I get to know. I guess you could say I’m blackpilled, not that I want to be. But I give up, the world is too bleak to even try to be involved in, and apparently I’m the odd one out for not accepting this treatment pattern as normal.

No. 1703936

>>1703930
i am in an abusive relationship you fat faggot tranny

No. 1703937

i GuEsS yOu CoUlD sAY iM blaCkPiLLEd like ok go be insane somewhere else

No. 1703938

>>1703936
You and most of the other women I know. At least you recognize it.

No. 1703942

>>1703938
trying to leave is a gigantic mindfuck no matter how many cons you list and how rational you try to be about it and at some point youve disrespected your own boundaries and who you thought you were so often that you go kind of insane and hollow!

No. 1703944

>>1703937
I get so tired of how psychotic and condescending they are

No. 1703948

>>1703944
i'd think they are men if i didn't know about all of those embarrassing 16 year old autistic girls on twitter being ~blackpilled~ like no you're just an insane virgin

No. 1703951

>>1703944
Yeah yeah I’m well aware. Not understanding women’s willingness to continuously engage in the same horrific patterns we have all witnessed growing up and throughout our whole lives means I’m insane, heartless, evil, whatever other synonyms for that you can list off. I was digging for a construction project once and I kept saving beetles from downing in the water at the bottom of the ditch, I’d set them on the grass and blow their bodies dry. Then they’d march back into the water and die. I eventually gave up. Story unrelated. But yeah no I agree with you mostly, I clearly wasn’t designed to live in this world.

No. 1703952

>>1703930
Jesus faggotfucking Christ let the woman vent about her life you immature pricklet.
>>1703917
Nonna I am so sorry you went through all that. Sending hugs your way if you want them

No. 1703954

>>1703951
you're like the worst troll ever because i zone out halfway through and stop comprehending what youre saying because you write like abraham lincoln came back to life to finish that play he got shot at

No. 1703956

>>1703948
>virgin insult
Cannot help but kek at this (sadly). You’re just proving my point that most women place so much value on being sexually involved with men at the expense of all other things that a refusal to engage in being abused is seen as a personal defect. We’re sooooo fucked kek

No. 1703957

>>1703956
no i was just saying that you have no idea how a romantic and sexual relationship impacts you psychologically before you actually have one you dumb gamer word

No. 1703958

>>1703951
YOU ARE A 62 YEAR OLD MAN.

No. 1703960

>>1703954
Anon… Lincoln did not write the play or act in it kek. Points for creativity though cheers

No. 1703961

>>1703960
we really really need to find a cure for autism

No. 1703962


No. 1703963

I was digging for a construction project once and I kept saving beetles from downing in the water at the bottom of the ditch, I’d set them on the grass and blow their bodies dry. Then they’d march back into the water and die. I eventually gave up. Story unrelated. But yeah no I agree with you mostly, I clearly wasn’t designed to live in this world.

No. 1703964

>>1703960
YOU ARE A 62 YEAR OLD MAN.

No. 1703966

>>1703956
You hijacked a woman's vent about her miscarriage and shitstain boyfriend to rant about how you ~can't relate to other women~ for five fucking sentences. Please fuck right off back to your containment thread and let the adults talk in peace.

No. 1703967

>>1703961
You’re right, autistic people are bad at coming up with jokes

No. 1703969

i have nothing to do with this lovers quarrel

No. 1703972

>>1703963
Why u reposting my story nona, did it touch your heart so deeply…

No. 1703974

>>1703972
you are a mess

No. 1703976

>>1703967
or understanding them

No. 1703980

>>1703974
whatever you say my friend.

No. 1703982

>>1703980
now you know i would stab you in the face if we ever met(calm down)

No. 1703984

File: 1695351248311.gif (2.62 MB, 498x270, tenor-1.gif)

>>1703972
I was digging for a construction project once and I kept saving beetles from downing in the water at the bottom of the ditch, I’d set them on the grass and blow their bodies dry. Then they’d march back into the water and die. I eventually gave up. Story unrelated. But yeah no I agree with you mostly, I clearly wasn’t designed to live in this world.

No. 1703987

>>1703982
wow and I’m the evil one… but it’s okay. I dodge your attack swiftly like a praying mantis(weird infighting)

No. 1703989

>>1703984
gif really was how I felt watching it happen

No. 1703990

>>1703987
youre too fat for all dat

No. 1703991

>>1703990
Get it

No. 1703993

>>1703990
Actually I weigh 0.2 pounds. Very heavy for a insect but it’s all bug muscle, or bugcle, if you will

No. 1703994

>>1703993
you are an old weird pedophile sir

No. 1704003

>>1703994
Listen I know I shat a bit on the Abraham Lincoln thing but honestly I prefer the creative stuff to whatever this is. You could try again but use the teddy Roosevelt assassination attempt instead because he actually was giving a speech I think. Don’t quote me on that though

No. 1704008

I'm sick a week later from my (not really) friend coming over. I'm immunocompromised and he visited me directly from the hospital. I should have said no but I wanted to be a good friend because he's going through a rough time and this is what I get for not holding my boundaries. I'm so frustrated I wanna scream, but my voice is still gone.

No. 1704009

>>1703697
look up Sasha Ayad's work and the Wider Lens podcast, they also released a book that may be helpful. you're not the parent and probably can't be that influential. if it is fetishistic especially so, even if social contagion was part of why he developed the identity. Angus Fox wrote some articles on boys transitioning you might find helpful. https://quillette.com/2021/04/02/when-sons-become-daughters-parents-of-transitioning-boys-speak-out-on-their-own-suffering/
you should not have to be 100% affirming but being too harsh in trying to get him to stop may completely destroy your relationship. You have to think of this like he is in an abusive relationship/in a cult and what matters is maintaining your relationship more than your differences. Hang out more, improve your relationship. How open can you be with each other?

No. 1704012

>>1703697
Sorry anon, porn addiction sets in for moidlets earlier and earlier these days. Unfortunately the coom with top any other aspects of his life and so he’s unlikely to change, so you’re better off just coming to terms with it early in whatever way you think you can handle

No. 1704018

>>1703951

Of all women who are murdered by abusive partners, 75% of said murderers killed them right as they tried to leave. Do you think nona is in that relationship because she likes being abused? She has probably can’t leave even though she wants to.

>>1703917

I am so sorry you had to go through that alone. Miscarriages are one of the most miserable things a woman can go through, physically and mentally. You deserve care, nona. Don’t let that asshole convince you that it wasn’t a big deal or that you’re unreasonable for being upset

No. 1704025

>>1703993
Can't tell if you are a 12 year old boy or a 45 year old man which definitely means you're the latter

No. 1704034

>>1704025
wrong, a spry 34 in bug years

No. 1704042


No. 1704050

>>1703930
No one cares you dumb bitch quit making her vent about yourself.

No. 1704057

so do i help the feds by keeping quiet or by yelling loud? someone help

No. 1704059

>>1704057
You turn yourself in to an inpatient program and section yourself. Hope this helps

No. 1704061

>>1704059
woah there quite aggressive for a simple joke!

No. 1704065

Is it hard to make friends online or am I just retarded? It's really discouraging when I try to engage with people online and I can see the conversation dwindling down and I start to question whether I'm just a really boring or uninteresting person or something. Of course, it's not as if I'm swimming in friends irl but I still have a good handful and I did manage to make one good friend online. I wish I could know if I was doing something wrong so I'd know how to do better, or, if it's nothing personal. I hate existing in this in between where I'm unsure whether I just need to let things go because we just aren't a good match or whether I'm being socially retarded and could be doing better to be more interesting.

No. 1704179

i feel really fat. i've gained two pounds in the last two weeks and i feel like i'm going to keep gaining. i'm 134 pounds at 5'3. i posted on /ot/ before and another anon confirmed i am in fact kind of fat. i'm on antipsychotics (which i need to stay on) and birth control and they make me really hungry. i'm also recovering from an eating disorder and i weighed about 100 pounds for a year before i got back on my meds and gained all this weight back. i can't go to a gym because i live in a rural area and don't drive. if anyone has any advice on how to lose weight please tell me. i don't really want to diet because i feel like i'll end up starving myself again. but don't really know if thats possible on my meds. i'm always starving. i could probably eat more right now and i ate a big dinner and its almost 2 am my time… any advice is appreciated.

No. 1704182

File: 1695361974859.png (835.75 KB, 1150x1278, Screen Shot 2022-12-21 at 5.20…)

i've been unemployed for 36 days and it's the first time in ten years i haven't had a cystic pimple. i might be entering my neet era

No. 1704183

>>1704179
it's definitely the antipsychotics
>which i need to stay on
are you really sure? at least maybe ask your shrink for a med change, not all antipsychotics are the same in terms of side effects, especially weight gain. some are extreme and some are mild.

No. 1704184

>>1704183
i really like the med i'm on and when i don't take it i think people are stalking me and standing behind my shoulder and i get into really bad fights and also self harm. i don't want to try another med because this one works so well. also i know meds like seroquel need a very certain way of starting to take it or you can get sick. the med is risperidone/risperdal if it makes any difference to you…

No. 1704185

>>1704179
i've been 130-135 at 5'2 since middle school, you are not fat especially if you are active. i've been a lazy pos lately and even though i technically 'weigh less' i look bigger and my clothes don't fit the same. stop looking at your scale and base your goals on your healthy sized clothing, things you want to accomplish, and how you feel doing things.

No. 1704186

>>1704183
i also dont see a shrink i can only see a general practitioner which aren't really equipped to deal with this shit. i got put on this med in the mental ward. i could maybe see a "med manager" but apparently the waitlist is so long i couldn't get on it before. i only have insurance through my state so an actual shrink is not an option. i would have to go inpatient to get my meds seriously adjusted.

No. 1704188

>>1704185
i try to go on walks but the meth problem in my area is really bad and i always see scary people and it freaks me out. i walk with my mom though, i should try to be going every day. i just get really paranoid a psycho methhead is going to stab me or try to rob me.

No. 1704189

>>1704179
also fuck that anon who called you fat, i hate anafags because they always call on their norweigan farmer friends to help them move. i'd rather be able to do things myself than be skinny for.. who? you look perfect the way you are anon

No. 1704190

>>1704184
i've been on risperidone and i got very bad hyperprolactinemia from it, that certainly is one of the causes of very fast weight gain.
>i don't want to try another med because this one works so well
then sadly you'll have to deal with the side effects, extreme appetite on antipsychotics can't really be managed, sorry.
>>1704186
that's absolutely horrible nona, no wonder you're feeling so shitty. mental wards are abominations.
>would have to go inpatient to get my meds seriously adjusted
i'm dealing with the same shit and i just went off meds completely kek. the horrid apathy isn't worth it to me. (i was prescribed haldol/haloperidol, also in a ward)
>i could maybe see a "med manager" but apparently the waitlist is so long i couldn't get on it before
please try to do it regardless, living like this isn't a way to get better

No. 1704195

>>1704190
i can't believe they prescribed you haldol, i've always read thats a last resort for if no other meds will work. the side effects of that one seem awful. i'm sorry you also have had to deal with that shit. it sucks having psychosis. i wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. also i do think my body is making too much prolactin, i lactate like crazy on this med. but again i'm too afraid they'll try to take me off this med and i like the med. i actually did bring the lactation up to my doctor before years ago the first time i was on it (i went off it for two years) and she tried to say it was normal and then just talked about her own titty discharge (shes kind of crazy and self centered).
>>1704189
thank you anon. you are very sweet. both my partner and my mom have been making comments about my weight, saying i "shouldn't gain anymore" and that i'm "tubby" so its been really hard on my self esteem. especially when i've dealt with an eating disorder in the past and that was the only time i was happy with my body.

No. 1704196

i wanna stop farting or have diahrea already i regret having that dark chocolate.

No. 1704197

>>1704195
>i've always read thats a last resort for if no other meds will work.
it's the cheapest one and will certainly calm down (turn into a vegetable) literally anyone so they decided it's good
>she tried to say it was normal and then just talked about her own titty discharge
kek wtf, how did she even get the qualification to work? probably a paid/nepo degree
sending you love nonita, we'll get through this

No. 1704198

>>1704197
sending you love too anon, hope you can be put on some correct meds one day. hope you're coping for the time being

No. 1704203

Step dad got diagnosed with cancer in June. He died yesterday. I'm so angry

No. 1704220

>>1703936
kek based reply honestly

No. 1704231

>>1701204
next time it happens, go outside and find a big, nice rock that you can throw. stick a note on it saying something like 'stop blasting your fucking porn!' and destroy his window.
sounds unhinged i know but in your place i'd probably do it if i was fed up enough. he asked for it and you'd be doing a service to your neighbors ad well. as long as he doesn't see you you're good.

No. 1704254

File: 1695378029548.jpeg (301.39 KB, 1029x2048, IMG_5621.jpeg)

this is why women absolutely need to stop using tiktok and social media

No. 1704262

I keep telling myself I'll change and not waste time on games and check lolcow and I'll stop scrolling on tiktok and then I'll be bored enough to do the creative ideas I have but I never really go through with it. It's like my brain is wired to be distracted now and it doesn't know anything else. I have an addiction problem.

No. 1704265

>>1703612
You're not stupid, you're a good mom who's literally trying to save your kid. Try to cut off the addiction now nona, ipad babies have less white matter in their brains and have lower life long IQs compared to babies not given screens. I don't know your relationship and its nuances, but you should consider going nuclear over this. Talk to your lawyer who will be able to petition the courts to change the custody agreement to forbid screens under a certain age. Because of the dangers associated with screen time, a knowledgeable judge will take this as seriously as if your husband was exposing your child to cigarettes.
Here's a quick link to a study outlining some of the dangers, but the more evidence you gather to give to your lawyer, the better.
https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/fullarticle/2754101?guestAccessKey=56c4b22b-ee5f-4594-bb23-c3813c9cccb1&utm_source=For_The_Media&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=ftm_links&utm_content=tfl&utm_term=110419

No. 1704267

I hate that I still have my old manager on fb that fucked me over the past two years with holidays and shite. She ruined my last 2 Christmases with my step dad and while she was celebrating her birthday yesterday my step dad took his gasping last breaths after being in a hospital bed hooked up to a driver in our house for the last 3 weeks being told every day this will be his last. I was scrolling fb yesterday and saw it was that cunts birthday and in my head went "I bet it happens today while she's made sure she has probably 2 weeks off to celebrate her birth and her accomplishments" and 3 hours later he died. I know it's irrational to be angry at her but I'm angry at a lot today and she's enemy number 1 currently.

No. 1704285

File: 1695386218070.jpeg (54.65 KB, 750x691, B90BD68A-4130-4785-892C-CC1A0B…)

Not super serious stupid little baby vent but. I hate that this girl makes my friend laugh really hard, stop it only I’m allowed to do that. I feel so jealous and sad, it’s that stomach dropping and full of dread feeling, I only hate when she does it because I don’t particularly like her. Blegh barf urrrrg i feel so bad.

No. 1704289

I see my former classmates having kids already and ngl it's making me so angry. There's something insulting about seeing the people who used to bully you every single fucking day for five years have families and having a seemingly happy lives.

No. 1704293

I hate meeting new people. I just don’t understand how people work. Why go on and on about how we should do X and Y together and how “omg we have the same tastes, I’m so glad we found each other” but later show no interest?
Then I accept that okay maybe I just wasn’t special, that’s fine! That’s part of meeting others. Maybe Im just too socially stunted I didn’t know people do that to everyone new they meet — but why then later RANDOMLY tell me we should do a group cosplay? Hype it up? even offer to drive me there & let me borrow her props and make-up, but then when I try to schedule it, it’s all dry replies/stop answering altogether?
Con is tomorrow and it’s like she just forgot. I brought my outfit and shit for nothing because she’s only hanging out with her actual friends. Which okay, fine, I’m not meant to be close to about everyone I meet. But then, why?
What am I doing wrong? I can take someone not caring for me, but when the random “lovebombing” and plan proposal starts, only to then act like I’m not there, I’m left feeling so confused. Am I just too socially inept? Can someone please chime in?

No. 1704294

I'm starting to feel like a real sexual degenerate, but I can't stop having fantasies about my mentors ever since I started shadowing at the hospital.
I'm being mentored by a bunch of doctors and it's so fucking HOT having young doctors explaining to me all sorts of things and asking me to do things. I have so many fantasies in my head and I can't stop staring at their hands.They have really nice, delicate, clean, tidy heands since they work with them, they move them around when explaining things to the patients or to me..
I hope I get used to it, but at the same time I hope not because it makes me so happy to go to work.

No. 1704299

Im going to breakup with my boyfriend, and everyone is going to be upset because “hes so perfect for me”. He cant even bother to stop smoking weed for 3 weeks and got offended when I asked him to show support for me quitting. This fuckhead hasnt done anything to help plan and grow our future together, wont take a tolerance break, and wont even consider the steps it takes to prepare for the rest of our lives.
Being sober around him is absolutely depressing and I now realized I smoked so much to dull my disdain for this life we've made. Now I am sober, I cant deny he has no future.
Absolutely heartbreaking.

No. 1704301

>>1704285
Big fucking mood girl, I know how you're feeling

No. 1704303

>>1704299
I'm glad you're taking yourself seriously and putting yourself first nona, it's not okay for anyone to put pressure on you or guilt you about a romantic relationship and potential life partner. You're trying to do better for yourself and if they can't see that, too bad, it's not their life!

No. 1704327

>>1704293
She sounds like she has BPD they literally always talk themselves into shit like this and then ghost because they're too pussyshit to pull through.

No. 1704353

Ever since that one horrible night, I get anxious at night now and I don't know why. It's the worst when I'm at work or not at home, I'll suddenly feel the flight or fight response randomly and it messes me up. I don't want to feel like this anymore. I don't know if I'll ever be myself again.

No. 1704372

File: 1695394009831.jpeg (26.3 KB, 621x402, A8D83C0E-4AF2-4E94-B67D-B72E74…)

I fucked up my beef stew that was otherwise perfect taste wise by adding too much corn starch, all that time and energy wasted

No. 1704383

>>1704372
been craving beef stew lately so reading this made me sad kek i'm mourning for your stew as well nonnie

No. 1704393

Had this nightmare where I had a 2 year old son who I had to leave with folks to be watched and somehow he already was showing violent tendencies, running away, and swearing.
That freaks me out so much.

No. 1704397

I feel like my brain and body are a prison right now. I wish I didn't wake up. Will it ever get better?

No. 1704406

I HATE my boyfriend's friends. My boyfriend is friends with a bunch of fat fugly fucks, and the ones that aren't fat are still fugly. I know it's going to be cringe of me to say my boyfriend is the most attractive out of all of them but it's objectively true, he's genuinely the most attractive of his friends. Every time he brings me around them they're just mean as fuck to him and they seemingly single him out for insults and rude comments and oftentimes ignore him. It pisses me off. I'm pretty sure they're jealous of him or something because he has mentioned that there were multiple girls that his friends liked that ended up having crushes on him instead of said friends. He's incredibly athletic, has that very cute "clean cut" handsome vibe to him, he wants to be a teacher, he's incredibly optimistic, very kind, goes out of his way to try to make people comfortable, etc. And I can't help but think that they're kind of envious of him. I told him to not invite me to hang outs with his friends because they make me mad as fuck kek. I dislike them so fucking much it's not even funny. I wish my boyfriend had better friends. And I don't think it's just "boys being boys" because he does have other friends who he has a very supportive relationship with who don't tear him down. It's just when these ugly fucks get in a group they just single him out and target him. I hate them.

No. 1704408

>>1704406
Samefag;
>I'm pretty sure they're jealous of him or something because he has mentioned that there were multiple girls that his friends liked that ended up having crushes on him instead of said friends.
Forgot to specify that this was in high school and everyone's been out of high school for about six/seven years now.

No. 1704421

My friend wrote a book and I've no doubt it's good but man I can't seem to get into it at all. I don't want to be a bad friend and not read it but YA just isn't my thing.

No. 1704423

The jokes about Turkey Tom getting carved are funny. It’s kind of nice watching annoying men like him get made fun of

No. 1704435

>>1704406
Bring it up to him (in a way that won't make you come off as an unhinged girlfriend trying to isolate him from his friends).
>"Hey boyfriend, I noticed in group settings your friends seem to say a lot of putdowns towards you that appear to be more than just bants. Do you ever feel a certain way about that? What draws you to them as friends and what are they adding to your life in terms of friendship?"
Let him explain it. Don't make it about yourself because he may just see the solution as not inviting you to these gatherings anymore and the bs will just continue behind your back. If he's never really given it much thought then maybe asking him the questions will make him think and realize that he can do better.

No. 1704477

Anxiety makes my life miserable. I overthink, I stress, and I can't work, I can't have fun. Today I had to sit 2 hours outside of the office building to calm myself down and clear my head from the intrusive thoughts. Sports, good diet, and a sleep schedule don't help. I am too afraid to go to the doctor.

No. 1704481

>>1704477
If you go to the doctor what is the worst thing that can happen? It can't get any worse. I was in the same boat and anxiety still prevents me from doing some things but being proactive and doing the things you don't want to is the best thing you can do!

No. 1704486

>>1704481
The doctor may say that I am overreacting or I am faking. Or what if I act stupid in the clinic, disturb someone, or act awkward?

No. 1704489

>>1704477
it sounds like you would benefit from meds short term while working with a therapist, but while trying to do that you could try lavender oil pills. you can read up on Silexan (drug name) they're otc and can help with anxiety.

Trying to get rid of intrusive thoughts completely doesn't work, you have to learn to tolerate and accept them to move in.
http://youtube.com/watch?si=Uf_PCp6AUusdjM23&v=n7tWwp5dgmU&feature=youtu.be

No. 1704490

I don't know if this happens in other countries, I never saw it happen when worldwide trends were a thing, but people on twitter keep trending the worst tags ever for no reason. I'm from the place that had that awful earthquake this year, the earthquake tag is trending so I get really nervous. I click the tag and there's a bunch of nonsensical tweets and random propaganda about shit no one cares about and fucking sex workers spamming every random trending hashtag there is under their tweets. In turn this makes those tags trend even more and they get on top. If there happened an earthquake right now I wouldn't even know cause all I'd see is tranny sex worker and political cult ads. I know it's my fault for expecting anything from twitter but it pisses me off that I get nervous every time and I don't know if the thing that started the tag was an earthquake or some rando tryna get views on their tweets.

No. 1704499

>>1704486
And so what if the doctor says you're faking it? Then you go home and the doctor has forgotten about you before you've walked out the front door. So what if you act stupid or disturb someone or act awkward? You're not important enough for anyone to give a real shit about that. I genuinely don't mean this in a mean spirited way but realize that you're just you, one insignificant stranger amongst a mass of strangers and just one patient amongst a stream of patients every single day, 5 days a week. None of these strangers you may meet at the clinic nor the doctor you'll be talking to will care or will be thinking about you at the end of the day when they get home and talk about their day to their loved ones.

I know anxiety fucking sucks, been there and I've overcome it so I know what it's like, but you have the choice to either go and face the doctor for a completely justified reason or you can continue to live paralyzed by fear. You're allowed to request help from your doctor and you're allowed to be amongst strangers at a clinic as a flawed human, just like everyone else.

No. 1704502

Spooky, I came to post pretty much >>1704477 and my fears are >>1704486. I’m sorry to see you’re also struggling, Nona. I hope we both find the courage (?) to get the help we need.

No. 1704512

i honestly have a really punchable face and the way i move my mouth makes it even worse. idk how to help it but even i'm really irritated looking at a video of me. it's not even really ugliness i just look so annoying, and tbh i am

No. 1704524

File: 1695412127275.jpg (70.6 KB, 900x1200, 1685607986814.jpg)

Got sick with a virus and I'm feeling insecure about my weight, I'm a naturally slim person but as I'm shitting every 3 hours a day I lost some weight and it triggers me, I'm very insecure about the way I look, people always tell me I got no ass/ boobs/ I'm too boney and it just got worse, I feel like a fucking stick figure and feeling myself is strange as my bones are sticking out a bit, god I wish I was fuller in general

No. 1704543

>>1704524
there is always time to gain or lose weight nonny. but i'm sorry, body image shit can be so hard. wishing you recovery from your virus and lots of peanut butter, olive oil and healthy weight gain in your future!

No. 1704561

File: 1695415902526.jpg (50.35 KB, 637x637, F4Va0XdWcAEJthe.jpg)

I asked a girl I have a crush on if she wanted to go get coffee with me this weekend and she said yes. I'm worried that she's only doing this out of courtesy because she seemed nervous when she said yes and she's only dated dudes before. I feel like I should be happy but I'm overwhelmed with anxiety

No. 1704565

File: 1695416611654.jpg (333.04 KB, 595x566, Tumblr_l_2252164352751334.jpg)

I'm getting my hopes up high because it feels like this time it can actually work out but I'm so afraid to get hurt again. The "issues" we had these past months are no longer there, we've been spending a lot of time together lately and he's no longer making me feel like I'm a burden for wanting to be with him, the opposite actually. I just don't want to get my heart broken again and much less by the same guy kek I'm trying to taking it easier this time, but fuck. I'm so in love with him, I really want it to work out

No. 1704581

File: 1695418744217.jpg (1.05 MB, 2396x3600, D5m8OzmXkAEaGnh.jpg)

I dyed my hair platinum blonde for no good reason and I look like fucking Bleachella. Also I forgot I don't look like Jessica Chastain and my features are even more trollish now.

No. 1704590

i tried to update my phone to the new ios and it broke my phone. when it restarted it took me through the steps like you would a new phone, but when i tried to sign in to my icloud it keeps saying cannot connect to the server and i cant go any farther. im not very tech-y but the area im at right now only has wifi, no cell service so im wondering if that might have something to do with it being unable to connect. i have no idea. but if it doesnt work by the time i get home i'm probably going to scream

No. 1704603

File: 1695420016845.jpg (Spoiler Image, 712.89 KB, 2012x2015, F6n7pvFbMAA_CLT.jpg)

My boyfriend called this drawing "rancid" and said it was cringe "dd/lg e-girl" content with "pretty princess points" meme vibes because of the pink/white color scheme with the blood, the rules on the mirror, religious decorations from different denominations of Chrisianity (the artist is a Japanese woman), and the photos of her with the taller/older male figure.
I disagreed with him on everything but the "e-girl" vibe, and said it's just dark, edgy, pretty/pastel vent art about being forced to do ballet. Tbh I think he just doesn't understamd. Spoilered for nudity/blood

No. 1704607

>>1704603
He’s a man, he would never understand.

No. 1704608

File: 1695420353952.png (Spoiler Image, 7.7 MB, 2744x3000, collage0.png)

>>1704603
We looked through other stuff on the artist's account, and he took the last drawing in this set as as "evidence" it's dd/lg, but there's literally nothing dd/lg here. I don't get it.

No. 1704611

>>1704603
Your boyfriend is right kek

No. 1704615

>>1704603
>vent art
Hate how that's being used to describe creepy self indulgent art that depicts corny self harm

No. 1704617

>>1704608
i half agree with your bf to be honest. he's not entirely right but not entirely wrong either

No. 1704619

>>1704608
Nooo nonnie stop you can’t be more coomrotted and less based than a man please this is embarrassing

No. 1704626

>>1704608
nona u have to be joking..

No. 1704631

>>1704608
Forget it, you’re getting fooled by the art style because there aren’t any huge ass boobs. But it really gives me ddlg vibes.

No. 1704635

>>1704607
I'm a woman and I don't "get it" either, the drawing really has BPD/DDLG vibes.

No. 1704673

My mum is fighting with me. She sent me a list of everything that she has had to deal with bad in her life and the first one is pregnancy. Then divorce. Menopause. Her parents dying. Her broken engagement etc etc. And literally it's like hi mum I know all the things wrong in your life because you never stfu about them and literally all of them apart from your menopause directly affected me too. Oh your pregnancy was bad sorry for me. Oh your divorce was bad, yeah was a bummer when dad left and you became physically abusive to me over 9 years. Sucked when grandma and da died too yeah, they instilled better morals into me than you ever fucking did. Yeah your broken engagement sucked so bad oh boy sure glad your abusive army boyfriend and his crazy daughters you hated didn't move in. Woe is us! This woman thinks she lives in a fucking vacuum

No. 1704690

>>1704673
sounds like covert or vulnerable narcissist bs

No. 1704712

I hate living with family. Everyone has that one thing that you’re disgusted by. One thing that makes you gag and almost puke. For me, that’s filthy bathrooms. I’m not a snob, I can live with it if it’s just drain hair or something I can easily scrub off with water, but deep disgusting filth makes me want to vomit.
My family invited a bunch of moids to stay, and they fuckin made the shower disgusting. Dirt, hair, random objects stuck to the floor that water won’t get off, I can’t fuckin be in there. It makes me want to vomit. I haven’t showered in 5 days because I try to clean, but I can’t control the gagging and I end up puking. Nobody else wants to clean it, and my parents won’t let me use their shower. I’m si tired, I’m disgusting, and I just want to feel clean

No. 1704713

File: 1695428527114.jpg (73.47 KB, 625x605, 6bea25e342e95aec44e7ef76ee25d2…)

had to fight my older sister because she is a raging self centered cunt. how tf do you live with ME at MY place sleep on MY couch use MY internet, balcony etc but have the NERVE to be like "give me my charger or ill punch you in the face". I am not even that type of person. I don't mind offering my place up. But don't take and take from me and the second I take one thing thats yours suddenly i have to give it back when you are having a bad day. All this because i said im tired of cleaning up after my sisters mess. its to the point where i havent cleaned my room in months because i am always cleaning the bathroom and kitchen because NO ONE ELSE DOES IT. so by the time I finish cleaning im too tired to clean my room. I am so tired of these bitches getting me out of character its annoying. I hate cursing people out because I go the jugular every time. But she really had the audacity to say don't touch her stuff while using all of my shit FOR FREEE. she never offered to pay rent, the most she's done is given me $86 for the internet this past week. Not because idk she has lived here rent free for the past 5 months but because SHE needs the internet to use HER phone. I told her I wish she went through with her suicide attempts. I dont care anymore. Now that i think about it my whole life she has been nothing but rude to me. Gave me so many insecurities. I remember i was about 5 years old and i was playing on a lamp just swinging around in a circle like a kid. And she said i am going to grow up and be a stripper. I was 5. When she worked at urban outfitters back in the day she was raving to my brother about how he should work there. When i jokingly said what about me she told me wiht a serious face that I would only be allowed to work the back of the stores when i was about 15. This is after she just got done telling my brother only ugly people work the stockroom. Constantly called me fat to the point where I have an issue going into the kitchen to get food. Literally in the middle of the argument she said im a fat bitch because i eat all the food. I am literally not even fat. and never have been a day in my life. That's not even the point it's just funny and showed that she was losing the argument. she is mocking me for eating up "all the food" But also the food won't get eaten if i don't eat it. I have thrown out thousands of dollars worth of food waiting for these bitches to eat it. Have thrown out weeks old leftovers she "forgot about". Literally have rotting avocado and plaintains sitting on my kitchen counter as i type because she doesnt cook. She just buys shit and lets it go bad. But let me decide to eat it before it does and suddenly im a greedy fat bitch. Of course she wouldnt know how much food gets wasted in this apartment because she has NEVER LIFTED HER FINGER TO CLEAN ONCE. Had the audacity to brag about leaving and living somewhere else like maam we wanted you gone since july! BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE DONT LET THE DOOR HIT YA WEAR THE GOOD LORD SPLIT YA HOE

No. 1704726

45 year old balding Japanese moid that uses 10-20 year old photos on every platform because he's so insecure and a loser with no life in recent years: "I'm picky about women, I won't get married if I have to compromise". While trying to flirt with me. Almost 20 years younger. Compromise what, you fucking joke of a man? Holy shit. This man really trying to convince me that he's single because he is picky. You were kinda cute ten years ago, my dude. You're not even rich and you have no personality besides "Mr International culture, lived abroad for a few years". Men are so fucking pathetic. He still talks about his one European gf from ten years ago, and has seemingly had little experience before or after. How are these people real.

No. 1704735

The world is fucking burning and/or flooded and I'm somehow required to still work a job that's contributing to everything being fucked up or at least not helping it and pay taxes and rent?
Wtf? At this point I don't even know if we'll get good 10 years in the future, fuck this shit

No. 1704771

I've been feeling very lonely and nostalgic lately and I have the urge to track down old internet "friends" I met off of imageboards years ago. I don't know why.

No. 1704786

File: 1695435154601.jpg (47.51 KB, 283x320, 75a656356d879.jpg)

Everyone in my house is so angy because their jobs suck and I get it but they need to stop taking it out on other people who aren't doing anything to them, like I'm just sitting here. What the fuck did I do to you?

No. 1704800

>>1704771
Wtf this is my mood too anon. Something about September and the start of autumn making me feel nostalgic, lonely, and longing for something. The other day I took a look at my old deviantart account from 12 years ago. I noticed that an old friend had left a last comment on the account 4 years after I had completely abandoned it. I tracked down the profile and found her most recent twitter, pixiv, and youtube account. It's nice that she's kept her sense of humour even after all these years. I wish I could send her a message somehow, telling her I miss being her friend, to thank her for reaching out even if this gratefulness is long overdue, and I really wish I could apologize for all the times I was an asshole during those years. She left that final comment on my account eight years ago so I wonder if she even still remembers me. Even if we reconnect I feel like we are just too different people now.

No. 1704803

>>1704786
My dad was the same way growing up. It's really shitty and I know how that feels. Wish I can give you a hug nonnykins

No. 1704808

>>1704800
Well, since we're in similar moods I almost say you should reach out. Obviously, I'm biased. Still, I think I would appreciate a nice gesture from an old friend that I haven't spoken to in years, so long as there aren't too many expectations from it.

No. 1704809

File: 1695438066434.gif (Spoiler Image, 3.91 MB, 400x166, buck.gif)

Manic narcissists are always emboldened when they think they have someone they can hurt and abuse consequence free and then the moment they realize they are threatened in any way with the consequences of their actions (which they often aren't until it smacks them in the throat like a shovel) they start fucking raging and bawling and sobbing and threatening to kill themselves and they go through this cycle over and over again. They are always convinced they are going to become famous too which is crazy. You are going down before you ever happen you freak.

No. 1704832

File: 1695439684722.jpg (79.49 KB, 932x1481, 61HWJ9r9v6L._AC_SL1500_.jpg)

Lately whenever I see toys for children or pets, I want to cry. The world is too cold for the defenseless little creatures, with their simple innocent joys. I can hardly even breathe from terror if I allow myself to think about it.

No. 1704859

>>1703076
nonny he has a scat fetish and is microdosing you on it to see if you will take the bait. run, dont walk.

No. 1704862

>>1704690
I googled vulnerable narcissist and it sounds like me. Can being raised by a self admitted narcissist rub off on their kid. My dad admitted to me a few weeks back he has narcissism. He's a millionaire and it tracts lol, he abandoned us when I was young. I guess narcissism breeds narcissists. Damn might off myself lol

No. 1704864

File: 1695442607594.jpeg (51.23 KB, 606x541, 1657104061923.jpeg)

bro i hate everything

No. 1704866

File: 1695443168776.gif (553.23 KB, 220x150, 1571970908849.gif)

why is it so hard to be a woman trying to have a relationship with another woman?? there are like 10 of us in this city and half of these are my exes and the other women who ghosted me. i cannot believe people romanticize being gay or think its cool. this dating pool is the same group of people fucking each other every couple of months i cant stand it please i want to be loved…

No. 1704871

>>1703076
Men are obsessed with shit its how they are so easy to spot online, they love making Johnny Depp tier scat jokes

No. 1704872

>>1704862
Yes, narcissists spawn more narcissists and schizos spawn schizos. Romanianon is a prime example.

No. 1704880

>>1704872
Yeah generally repeatedly hurting children hinders their development and has a profound effect on their lives and choices

No. 1704884

>>1704862
if you're self aware of these traits and understand they are negative and cause harm to you and others, you can change. it's not easy changing life long patterns especially those from family but you can do it.

No. 1704891

A friend asked to hang out after a long while of radio silence and I almost declined because I'm too ashamed of how fat I got. I like her and the other friends/acquaintances we'll meet but I'm so self conscious about how I'll look. I even considered planning to meet up a week later so I could starve myself though I know it'll never work cause I'm a fatass and get horrible headaches when I attempt to starve for longer than 24 hours.

No. 1704894

>>1704872
Is she still around?

No. 1704922

File: 1695454366021.gif (726.99 KB, 397x391, 949d0cc31b5788ecc66dd259f0bf47…)

I hate how women are psyop'd into turning into old ladies spiritually after they reach the long term relationship milestone with their bfs. Heck, even old ladies have way more fun than this type of women.
Me and a friend wanted to organize a bigger party (we are a big group from over the years) and someone had to object because her bf doesn't like big circles and she's one of our closest friends (who's the opposite of her bf). Not only that, but there are other little things that irk me from other of my friends in LTRs like:
>"oh, i will stay in today with my bf" (despite the fact this couple lives together and i barely see my friend, maybe 1-2 times/month),
>"i won't be able to arrive on time since i have to cook for my bf and he'll be alone for 2/3 days" as if he's 5 (arrives like 3 hours late and in the night too and i had to go to work in the morning)
>"sorry, today I'm hanging out with my bfs friends"
>carrying their bfs like some emotional support pet even when we explicitly said "girls' night" and we can't talk anything when they are around
>this "no fun allowed" attitude that you can smell from them
>trying so hard to act all mature so that their bfs and society here will approve. This one is cultural too since people see maturity as acting like (I hate to say this phrase) NPCs. Basically becoming kinda lifeless in a way (?)
All that and they are not even married yet and we're in our early 20's for fucks sake. What are they going to do in their 30's? Plan their places in the graveyard?
Now, me and a few other friends who don't coddle their men have other friends too, but these couple ones were really close to us and it kinda hurts to see us drifting apart like that…

No. 1704928

Any man who has talked a woman into anal deserves to be assraped by satan for all eternity

No. 1704930

>>1704928
i know this is the vent thread but based

No. 1704931

>>1704930
I'd have added "has not repented" but I don't think m*les are capable of repenting

No. 1704940

Going from having 0 internet presence to a very small following is so scary, I already sperged about hating trannies to close friends on accident, lol. I need to calm down before i become a cow myself. I never expected something i did to ever reach an audience outside of my small group of friends, so now i am getting my very first hate comments, and i don't know how to handle them. I was about to lash out because it made me mad they were accussing me of something i didnt do on something that was actually a pain to release, but i am dealing with it like an adult. I checked their accounts and they seem like actual children, which is scary to think children are watching what i put out, I still haven't gotten used to children being allowed on the same parts of the internets as adults.

No. 1704948

I can’t sleep because I couldn’t poop and my ears are popped, so I keep basically planning a class about how religions and politics aren’t part of a culture and I haven’t slept at all even though the reason why I couldn’t sleep before has stopped, but now I’m also stressed, but I also know that I shouldn’t be stressed because I can’t help living in a bureaucratic world, but I have this gut feeling that I won’t be able to get my fucking tittle this year or that getting it will be a pain in the ass.

No. 1704978

File: 1695465379662.jpeg (92.01 KB, 1260x828, 855B080B-DB5E-4041-9988-35C498…)

>>1704940
When posting online make sure your account and following is always stated to be 18+ only. Also thins out the crowd if you admit outright that you aren’t a handmaiden but if you’re an artist/content creator trying to make money just keep yourself as closed off as possible. The moment you respond to any sperg or follower they think its okay to talk to you or harass you. Hope you don’t get anymore hate nonna!

No. 1705001

File: 1695467590152.jpg (48.39 KB, 500x572, go cows!.jpg)

If I could get non-lite mode lc back I'd be so happy.

No. 1705002

>feel guilty after buying something new, like shoes
>don't buy any food and don't eat for the entire day out of guilt
Every time. It's not like I'm buying shoes or clothes often, the last time I bought sneakers was 1 year ago. Also I have savings and it's not like I struggle to pay the rent or buy food, and I still feel guilty. I have a clear goal in my mind, I want to save money for orthodontic treatment, I want to get jaw surgery in the future and even though my insurance can cover it, I would have to pay for the orthodontic treatment before and after surgery, and it's quite expensive. And besides that I still want to have savings just in case something happens, like if I lose my job or something. With the current costs of living I can't save enough at a rate that would be satisfying for me. And now these shoes. Sneakers won't pay for your teeth bitch. Reeee I still have the mentality of a poorfag like my mother. I always told myself I have to work hard and save as much as I can and only spend money on food so I can reap the fruits when I'm old..

No. 1705004

>>1704884
Yea the self awareness made me peek because I've had those isolated thoughts where I'm like, maybe everyone is envious and jealous!! I'm open to talking about this with people I did therapy years ago at the bequest of my dad and the therapist said I was very self aware etc. I feel like I objectively can detect me shit moods and I remove myself from situations, but I definitely do have intrusive thoughts where I try to justify misery by doing a marina and the diamonds and pretending I'm the main character. But I am so insecure. However I definitely do roll my eyes and exaggerate expressions when male coworkers try to be snarky towards me. I probably did it as a teenager to other girls but in my 20s I figured girls aren't enemies lol. Going to work on it

No. 1705017

>>1704978
Thanks nonny, i dont wanna go outright 18+ logo because i dont want to imply i do nsfw stuff(i dont), but i will start soft blocking every minor that interacts with my stuff

No. 1705025

>>1705001
click the big blue "exit lite mode" bar at the top of the page

No. 1705047

File: 1695471733143.png (1.47 KB, 424x20, sad anon noises.PNG)

>>1705025
There isn't anything like that, the update just broke lolcow for me and a few other anons. Apparently cerbmin wants to work on it but I'm impatient, still.

No. 1705062

>>1704922
God I hate this type of woman too. There’s being a uwu introvert and then there’s just giving up on life altogether. Unless it’s hanging out with their boyfriend’s friends, then suddenly they’ll expend the energy.

No. 1705066

File: 1695473035476.png (25.47 KB, 1654x162, Screenshot 2023-09-23 at 08.42…)

>>1705047
first I'm hearing of this, sorry shit's broke for you. Just to be sure, did you try looking a little bit higher than your screenshot shows? The blue bar can take a few seconds longer than the rest of the page to load.

No. 1705068

>>1705047
also did you try going to the url and deleting "lite." –maybe you can view the normal site if you type it in manually?

No. 1705069

People like you who think only people with a visible disability are valid make it hard for everybody else who has issues/invisible disabilities and "seem" able bodied. How about next time you use your goddamn brain instead of trying to be high and mighty in the public transports and to teach people a lesson. Dumb cow.

No. 1705072

There's this app i use that's a social/RP app. I use it to troll the horny moids when im stoned and have nothing to do. I recently had this guy tell me that he like girls who are 8-10 years old because "The best part about an underage girl is that you can brainwash them into being your slave." I ended up adding him on a burner snap and he was some fuck ugly guy from south africa. I took a screenshot and reported him on the app and snapchat but i got banned on snap for having a burner account. To make matters worse, i reported him on the app and they said they dont take reports for PMs. I feel like alot of social media apps dont give a shit about the fact that predators use them, thats why the reporting system is a fucking joke. Im livid rn

No. 1705086

>>1705072
>I feel like alot of social media apps dont give a shit about the fact that predators use them, thats why the reporting system is a fucking joke. Im livid rn
the predators are probably amongst their heaviest users, can't alienate their core userbase

No. 1705096

File: 1695475891355.jpg (510.7 KB, 978x1144, IMG_20230923_153000.jpg)

>>1696770
Replying to my own post because I don't know how to behave anymore. I was indeed avoiding him a little bit because the whole thing makes me uncomfortable, also he referred to me with "my lady" like two times which was cringe, I don't care if it was a joke or not. I thought that maybe it's better to talk to him less because moid logice seems to be like "she talks a lot to me, even if it's just about video games = she likes me = I have a chance"
I don't get it, he just said he doesn't want to talk about it on whatsapp and in the same message he asks me this question. I'm so annoyed

No. 1705105

>>1705096
If you're able to take a deep breath and shake off the awkwardness of everyone "shipping" you with him (not your fault, they're the ones making it weird), could you simply reply to him and say something like there are office rumors we should become a couple and I would like to put a stop to that so I am professionally keeping my distance. blah blah I want to keep work and personal separate moving forward because the talk from coworkers trying to pair us up was becoming uncomfortable blah blah something like that? but tailored to your situation.

No. 1705108

Im utterly defeated right now. Very rough mental health the last few days. Rough couple of months but came to a head where I just started crying all day a couple days ago. Im throwing up now and i dont know if its my anxiety causing it or if im experiencing anxiety in part because my body doesnt feel right. Im so anxious. I dont know what to do and i cant do much when im on the verge of puking again.

No. 1705113

>>1705062
Nah, 'cuz they are doing everything to appease their bfs even when they don't like his friends that much. I remember this girl i used to hang out in hs with who stopped hanging out with us the moment she got a bf and he didn't like us.
The saddest thing is that no scrote ever will go to these lenghts even when his friends are really shitty people and their gfs don't approve them for a good fucking reason, they just don't care. Paradoxically, women are expected to isolate themselves for an unwashed sperg

No. 1705114

I don't know what to do anymore. I don't have any friends. It's a matter of time until my Nigel gets tired of me. I'm antisocial and aggressive on social settings, all it takes is one thing to annoy me and I will act like a cunt and lash out immediately. I'm unable to make friends this way. People obviously don't want to befriend a human chihuahua.

No. 1705136

File: 1695480411167.jpeg (11.07 KB, 275x230, 1691649824750.jpeg)

My "family" is so fucking depressing and fucked up. If I ever fell in love with someone I will never introduce that person to my family because I'm just too ashamed to be associated with them. The funniest thing is they probably think they're normal. I never liked them, but living in another country and analyzing my adolescence and their dynamics from the distance made me truly realize how fucked up they were. I'm so glad I escaped, I remember my aunt wanted to take my apartment from me after my mother died because she thought I'm too stupid to be able to support myself financially. Now I can fully pay my rent and she can fuck off. I know she was always jealous of my mother, but how could you want to do something like this to your niece? And my uncle was literally hitting on me after my mother's death. Just like he was hitting on my mother when she was still pregnant with me and he was already married to my aunt. Just thinking about them makes me want to puke. I want to cry when I think that I don't have anyone in my family I can count on. Strangers are better to me than my family. It shouldn't be like this. My therapist is surprised I turned out the way I did given my fucked up background

No. 1705143

>>1705114
>People obviously don't want to befriend a human chihuahua.
I do.

No. 1705151

>>1705114
chihuahuas are loyal and protective though

No. 1705155

>>1705136
I'm going through a similar situation, I have to ask, are you from an asian country by any chance?

No. 1705156

>>1705114
bpdettes are so insufferable

No. 1705176

I could genuinely a-log about the way scrotes write online. They always sound like the stereotype of a redditor, you can feel the coldness and the dumb dull apathy through the screen. They always sound like children talking back to their mom, they can't agree and always wilfully misinterpret everything you say while insisting you're doing the same to them. When you call them out on ANYTHING their reaction is always NUH UH! I DIDN'T SAY THAT!
It's truly like that pigeon chess metaphor that redditors love to use. Moids are so retarded that they truly can't comprehend they're retards

No. 1705178

>>1705176
But yeah my man hate is reaching critical levels and I will have to go offline to not go full Solanas mode tbh

No. 1705184

gonna get medical ptsd from this kidney infection, seriously have to go to the hospital 3 times in one month because nothing is working and i didn’t have insurance up until a week ago.
i finally will have a pcp but my appointment is 10 days away and the cipro stopped working so lol either go to the hospital again or unironically die from sepsis!!!

No. 1705188

>>1705114
i'm just like you nonita and i can be your friend if you can tolerate me ♥

No. 1705242

Does anyone elses mom always try to third wheel when they bring their partner over? Its really weird and embarrassing to bring my boyfriend over to meet my parents, bc my mom will literally be on top of us 24/7. Always beeing int he same room, like super close to us at all times. It just makes it awkward. My brother and dad acts normal.

No. 1705290

I'm watching capturing the Freedmans and holy shit that one son is fucking annoying and vile, they all are. The one whose like a clown, he's fuckimg so aggressive and annoying towards his mother. I keep having to pause it, because the way he acts. Ugly fucker, the dad is a fucking pedo whimp and the kids don't even care about all the fucking legit cp magazines that the dad had around. But are so mad at the mom.
The son acts like his dad's lover instead of his child, anyone watch this shit? It's almost as frustrating as that In plan site documentary where the mom and dad let the same scrote kidnap qnd rape their daughter twice and BOTH have sexual relationships with him after

No. 1705306

>>1705290
that thing scared the shit out of me, i dont think i have ever seen something that make me as mad and uncomfortable as that

No. 1705338

File: 1695490833093.jpg (112.24 KB, 830x743, 1646660070084.jpg)

I cannot get a read on my work friend anymore whatsoever.

> be me, diagnosed with autism, several years at really good job

> be this other girl, start job, initially seem promising and managers are supportive
> fast forward a year later

She clearly hates this job and she's getting so pressed that people here do not give her what she wants, which is essentially to be paid to do absolutely nothing, but what's worse is she has yet to be diagnosed with autism but as soon as she cannot be fucked to come in and work she calls sick, fakes stomach bugs, says she does not have the energy, and when she is in, she takes it out on me, is callous and passive aggressive.

It really sucks because at first I thought she wanted a genuine friendship, but over time I've just seen more and more red flags and today is the one I'll vent about.

Our manager, who is also a friend, has been trying his best for over half a year, to basically help her not get sacked. He has gotten her referred to therapy which she wants, he has tried to adjust the timetables, but we have annual reviews and he was dreading it but he had to sit down and tell her (softly but firmly) that some changes need to be made and that her behaviour towards colleagues and customers has been downright apalling. Prior to this she'd always drunkenly insist she had him around her finger, but she's been on a vendetta since then, trying to get him done for workplace bullying, but it has gone nowhere and she's just shooting herself in the foot. A couple months ago, despite me already actually knowing what went down and how much said manager was dreading approaching her because he knew she'd cry, she sent me an essay about how ~abusive~ he is and it was one of many times where she'd expect respect of "energy" but then she'd traumadump on me and she never seems to consider my own energy. Outside of work she expects me to drop everything for her, at her beck and call, but she'll cancel and flake on me when it suits her.

I asked her if she could kindly talk to said manager herself and that while I'm happy to listen, this was a topic she needed to go to him for, and she backed off, but I have since found out that instead, she has gotten close with another colleague and meets them all the time to drunkenly bitch about how perfect she is and fuck all men, except her fiance, who she really really wants to cuck, but he's monogamous. She reeks of privelege all whilst maintaining that she is SO disabled and troubled, despite the fact that her fiance does everything for her and she is throwing tantrums now when the real world doesn't work like that.

Now I get to the vent. I lost my dad years ago, and my mother has just been told she may have little time left because she isn't well, I am in my twenties and my parents are not old at all. She wants me to come over and reunite with her fiance and her so we say Saturday, today. Last night she messages me saying how she is just soooo burnt out from her two work shifts and can we reschedule for Sunday and I say sure and she always knows how understanding I am about energy, but after my shift today, I bump into her and this other colleague in the supermarket on the way home. She looks awkward and I realize she lied to me when any other friend would just say hey, can we reschedule, I overscheduled, but now I'm seeing that since I stopped letting her be entitled around me and bitch about people, she's clearly got her preferences.

What I hate is that she messaged me all soppy saying thank you soooo much for understanding energy and now I don't even know if I should bother tomorrow or just flake on her, considering MY energy levels are genuinely low and fuck does she know what that actually feels like, nonnas.

I feel like she's going to spend her thirties losing friends and potentially even her fiance if she keeps being shitty to people but I feel like my patience, actual autism, understanding and general kindness has been grossly taken advantage of. I will just remain above it and if she does mention it (she won't) I'll just smile and say there was no need to lie.

Made me wonder what else has she lied about besides to me and about my manager. My best friend and partner both do not like her, anyway, thanks for reading. I hate liars lol

No. 1705346

>>1705338
further context:

> "All men are so shit fuck all of them, except the ones I want to manipulate my fiance into having threesomes with"

> Omg but I'm like so sexy how dare our manager have to confront me about all my absent days, I can't be ~bothered~ to work so I'll call in sick
> omg my fiance is such a pain even though he's my only source of income because I spent it all recklessly before the first week of the month and he always cooks dinner, BUT MY SPOONS
> I'm so autistic I'm going to go to HR and get the manager and work done for ableism
> (burns self out and smokes weed all day) "I'm just so burnt out and have no energy :(((((((" (goes and makes plans with other person who tolerates her bitching)
> "working 2 and a half days a week is like my old factory job, I HATE IT HERE"
> applies for more hours here
> gets rejected twice
> "fuck them I'm applying somewhere else"
> (APPLIES A THIRD TIME TO THE SAME POST THAT OPENS UP)

No. 1705348

I wish I had never dated a tranny. Seeing trans shit upsets me more because of the fact that I had once a personal connection to them. I have so much hate and frustration in my heart and I wish I can just let all of that go.

No. 1705360

I don't feel mentally well anymore, but at this point I can't remember when the last time I felt good was.

No. 1705373

>>1705155
No anon, I'm from a slavic country currently working in a western european country

No. 1705375

tfw the only people who contact me are moids who have abused me in the past and have rosters of women they probably mass-hit up

No. 1705399

I hate people that don't get that being shown as "online" doesn't obliges you to answer to their shit immediately. I refuse to change my fucking discord status non-stop because of a few assholes that don't understand that people have a life. Even if I am at the PC I might enjoy doing something, or have to do something, or be too tired and apathetic to answer. Let me fucking answer when I want I never forced them to do it which should be a hint but too many people don't get hints and it's always idiots that only came online the last 5 years who don't fucking understand that a chat program isn't the same as an ongoing phone call.

No. 1705412

File: 1695494970148.gif (4.03 MB, 498x373, eg54y.gif)

Why can't things just be okay? Why can't things just go right for once? There's a fenced off mining area nearby where I live, but it's easy to get into. There's a huge cliff that leads right down into the mine and I might just make the jump tonight.

No. 1705416

help. i am having the worst diarrhea in a public restroom. life is hell.

No. 1705430

I don't like that suddenly he only wants to hang out on Sundays. So not staying the night anymore and only a few hours, when before he liked hanging with me so much we were doing 2-3 days together. I think he's seeing somebody else or losing interest in me. He is also taking longer to respond to my texts and just seems less interested or performative. Even when we are together it's like he treats me like a friend. I think I might cancel our plans tomorrow and just tell him to forget it because I don't want to date anymore. I feel like if I try talking about it with him he'll just get more distant so why bother

No. 1705438

>>1705338
Nona she’s barely a friend, I can see that you’re trying so hard but if I was in your shoes I would have given up and started doing the bare minimum as a colleague for her ages ago. You’ll be surprised at how much more energy you’ll have if you stop concerning yourself with her actions outside of work and just interact with her as work dictates. It’s easier said than done but try to separate yourself from her, especially in your personal life, and spend more time on people that matter like your mom and yourself. You only have so much time and she’s leeching your energy a lot right now.

No. 1705439

I really hope I stop missing them soon. The weekends are the worst, and I'm PMSing so it's amplified. I wonder how long it takes to get over losing someone who isn't dead. I hate that we parted ways, even if it was amicably because they're still dear to me. If we'd had a fight before going no contact, I think it'd be easier to move on.

No. 1705449

>>1705438
Thanks nonna. I'm going to distance myself but still be polite because we work together and live very close so it's best I stay civil. I actually did say to her she didn't need to lie to me and she guilt tripped me and basically said "I didn't mean to lie or be dishonest" in the same sentence as "I should have been honest with you" which said it all, really. Her fiance meanwhile genuinely seems to like me and I think he's a good egg, but I'm going to do as you say and save my energy, and I'm not going to bother making plans with her anymore. It is truly her loss and besides that, there's some weird sort of jealousy within her because last time we went out together and I had a backless dress on, she made this weird sudden remark of "Men only look at you because you don't have a ring on. They'd be looking at ME if it wasn't for my engagement ring!" like, yeesh. I will stop trying. Thank you for confirming my gut feeling of "this person needs to grow up and is taking advantage of me and others". I hope you have a pleasant evening kind nonna.

No. 1705455

>>1705416
Oof this is one of my worst nightmares. Hope it's all over soon nonna.

No. 1705462

(i need to post this here i can't say it to anyone irl, thank u for understanding nonas) howling, screaming, shitting, throwing up with laughter rn. messaged my old weed guy for some bud this evening and he was like 'yeah come pick it up but i'm meeting your ex for a smoke in a minute'. so i pull up, grab my weed and ask him whats going on in the life of my loser ex at the moment because i haven't spoken one word to the guy in like 2 years. AHAHAHAHAHA this fucking idiot has lost 2 (well paid!) jobs, still smokes himself into a coma every single night and still hasn't got carpet in his flat (it's been almost 3 years since he moved in). cheered me right up this evening, i'm lighting this spliff tonight in memory of my ex's self-respect. big man E you're a shit kisser, a massive fake-halal degenerate & you don't deserve your very adorable cat you absolute waste of oxygen. plus i've had sex with three other men since we broke up and all of them were bigger and better than you xx

No. 1705467

Why do I often feel like people think like I owe them certain reactions? I think it wouldn't be as severe if I wasn't a woman. I'm also an autist and this feeling like people expect from me reactions that aren't natural for me is very strong and it kills me. I want to lock myself in my home and never go outside again

No. 1705472

Making online friends is so fuckin frustrating sometimes. I feel like I end up driving the conversation most of the time because people only respond with ‘thats cool’ or answer a question I ask without asking anything back. I know not all conversation is a one-to-one exchange, but it’s hard for me to feel like the other person is interested when I’m the one asking all the questions or starting topics of conversation. But then if I don’t do that, the conversation ends up dying down and it looks like I’ve just ghosted that person and left them on read. I guess I could also just give low effort replies but then I get told that it doesn’t seem I am interested or that the conversation has become ‘dry’ or whatever. Am I honestly expecting too much from people?

No. 1705488

I just made such good apple cider donuts and boiled eggs I deserve an award

No. 1705504

Happiness is a choice, so why dont i choose it? Why do i make myself miserable? I am so tired anons. I am blessed to know how to help myself yet i cant bring myself to do it

No. 1705519

File: 1695501650387.png (127.84 KB, 350x264, ishethough.png)

>>1705504
>Happiness is a choice

No. 1705521

>>1705504
It's not always a choice, in plenty of circumstances that's like saying walking is a choice when you broke your leg. Don't put yourself down with such an unnuanced take!

No. 1705533

>>1705519
>>1705521
Im talking about things like
>waking/sleeping at the same time every day
>journalling instead of letting my thoughts race
>going outside even if only for 5 minutes
>looking at pictures of my favourite things
>singing along to favourite songs
>eating when hungry
>showering when stinky
>remembering how lucky i am to be alive, physically safe, financially supported, etc.
Very basic choices that instantly improve one's quality of life. Obviously these things in isolation won't solve all of my personal problems and definitely won't fix the world so EVERYONE can be safe and happy, but they make a difference for me. I could do any or all of these things but i dont

No. 1705535

Likcy Anus

No. 1705542

>>1705533
I don't disagree necessarily but I mean if depression is keeping you from doing those things (as opposed to laziness or whatever else) it's still not 100% a choice.

No. 1705550

>>1705542
Yes depression is a lifelong limiting factor of mine. But how am I supposed to come out of it when I ignore everything thats good for me? My situation is not at all hopeless so every day is full of wasted opportunities to make better choices. I am not trying to argue, just feeling sorry for myself

No. 1705559

I don't want to go to college, I would love to attend university but I can't until I have completed an expensive college degree I don't even want. I'm so frustrated, I wish there was something like a test you can do and if you make it you can go to uni. I had started college but I hated everything about it, I just want to learn, I'm not paying tuition to network. It's the system but it's so so frustrating to me. If I'm not motivated to do something I can't do it for 4 years.

No. 1705566

>>1705143
>>1705151
>>1705188
I feel like I'm surrounded by idiots, honestly. I blame on my stupid gaming hobby. I wish I could find nonnies in the wild but all I find are scrotes and pickmes. I hate Discord and Twitter so fucking much, I already deleted my Twitter years ago but I'm about to delete my Discord too. Being into videogames and anime while not being a pornsick retard is a curse.
>>1705156
That's what the moids that I snap on usually say, either call me BPD or fatherless, I don't have BPD but I would emulate their toxicity just to ruin your day and make you feel miserable.

No. 1705567

File: 1695505471708.png (92.27 KB, 1307x437, 011b87caf0986a91f9e5173140246d…)

i hate the whole queerio shit in general but there's something especially annoying about self-proclaimed demisexuals and their constant larp of being so unique, special and misunderstood. they see a character from a poor background who's fighting for her life so she can continue to provide for the only person she loves (her sister, only begrudgingly also her mother) and all they read is omg demisexual kween! dumbasses.

No. 1705594

Thinking about all those times I had been a shitty friend and a shitty partner. Like the time when my friend got upset and instead of consoling them, I made it about me and my feelings instead. Or how my ex was so much more into the relationship than I was when it seems like I just took it for granted. I was looking through our DMs and I noticed she was always the ones wishing happy X month anniversary. And how she mentioned that she'd like more selfies, but I never took much of them because I didn't like how I looked but I didn't put that discomfort aside when I knew receiving those pictures would have made her so happy. I wish I could have been a better person who didn't take people close to me for granted. I wish I can just be an emotionally intuitive and emotionally perceptive person who knows how to make their friends happy. I am not at my ideal self right now and I don't know how you can ever "improve" on these relationship things.

No. 1705605

File: 1695508100671.gif (671.29 KB, 640x360, B5FDBE92-86EF-4222-853F-8FAFE8…)

I wish I had one single person that cared about me at all. How the fuck am I supposed to break out of this shit hole I call a life. Really hurts to see other people making progress and being successful, sometimes I think about finding someone on craigslist to kill me, really what am I staying alive for, it’s over

No. 1705611

>>1705605
nona nooooo don't give a retarded moid the satisfaction. im struggling too and my parents think im a huge disappointment because i got injured at my job and am on disability im an only child so it fucking blows Stay strong, there are nonnies cheering you on from behind their screens.

No. 1705613

>>1705611
I’m sorry just why am I such a fuck up. extra fucked up after finding out a sort of online friend is younger than me and normal and well adjusted, has parents who love and support her. What that like? Must be nice.

No. 1705615

I was eating a salad that I made and at one point I felt something sharp and weird in my throat, I immediately wanted to spit it out but it ready got too far, I was scared I'm going to choke so I just drank lots of water. I'm scared because I don't know what it was. I've been a schizo since I found a sharp piece of plastic in a sandwich that I bought in a local bakery, I almost swallowed it. I managed to spit it out, it was above 1 inch long and it was really sharp and thick. I don't want to think what would happen if I swallowed it. Since then I've been preparing all my meals myself. But now I used lamb's lettuce from a plastic package though. Jesus christ why

No. 1705616

>>1705605
get a pet, they'll care about you and need you around

No. 1705643

File: 1695512015785.gif (685.63 KB, 498x375, homer-crying.gif)

>>1704713
still not over fighting my sister. i wish it never happened im mad at myself that i allowed her to get me to that low point. When she threatened to punch me I just freaked out and thought she was going to so i instinctively kicked her away but the way i was angled on the bed my foot kicked her face (not hard i didnt use any real force) which obviously got her mad and she started kicking and punching me. I honestly wasn't even kicking her hard because she is still my sister but she was trying to really punch me with all her strength. I just wanted her out of my room. I ended up apologizing today because I hate what I said but im pretty sure she's blocked me. I dont know why but ever since I was little I never got along with any of my siblings. We always end up physically fighting whether its brothers or sisters. My lttle sister choked me a few years ago because I didnt give her my debit card because i didnt like her attitude when she asked. (basically was like "im going to groceery store give me your card now" just rude lol. I dont know why but no matter what people always resort to violence when it comes to me. Its why i try to keep to myself and not talk to anyone. Every time i talk to someone I always end up saying something wrong and having them threaten me with violence. I understand saying "give me my charger or ill smack you in the face" vs PUNCH! I know im wrong and my post was very unhinged. I'm in despair by my actions and need intense therapy.

No. 1705647

>>1705643
You should have beat the shit out of her. Why do your siblings act like grunting cavepeople? Beat them so fucking bad that they're scared of being mean to you.

No. 1705656

>>1705647
thank you nonnie i dont know its like eveery time i stick up for myself it leads to a fist fight. It's why i never stick up for myself and im deathly afraid of confrontation. I dont know if i have a sign on my head that says "beat my ass". But it's like my siblings get mad at me for having a backbone. It's not even my siblings this has happened with friends and even relationships. It's like I'm not meant to be anything other than agreeable and a pushover. I still feel horrible for telling her to kill herself. Thats just mean.

No. 1705670

I hate how my mom’s culture doesn’t encourage saving for retirement and they expect adult children to financially take care of their parents. After my parent’s separation I overheard dad asking mom who’s going to take care of her when she’s old because she destroyed the business dad set up for her and refused to get a serious job or career. She confidently claimed I’d financially support her and be her caretaker because that’s the norm where she’s from. The nerve of her saying this when she had minimal contact or involvement in my life for almost a decade. She cheated on dad, wiped their joint bank account, squandered the six figures she got in the separation, declared bankruptcy, and comitted cheque fraud. It’s a struggle to have any loyalty toward her.
All of this was a long time ago but she’s done nothing to improve her behavior or situation. She’s close to retirement age and has little to show for it. The modest amount money she received when her boyfriend died will not last because she’s financially illiterate and reckless. She now planning to move from a low cost of living country back to a high one despite not being eligible for government support there. When her health declines I’ll have to step up and take care of her and it already fills me with resentment.

No. 1705682

>quit smoking 4 years ago
>today was a nice breezy fall day
>driving through a parking lot with my window open
>catch a whiff of some guy's cig
>instantly miss have a smoke on a nice day like this and wonder if I can afford to take up smoking again

It's literally worse than crack, I'm gonna be like this for the rest of my life aren't I

No. 1705694

>>1705656
Rough. It’s really nice to have sibling when the chips are down so be aware if that’s something you’re giving up but if they wouldn’t even be there for you (not to feed some Npd shit but sometimes we’re not blessed with such a family) then don’t feel bad for standing up for yourself. It’s hard to weigh in on stuff in an anonymous imageboard but if you’re struggling with a bad family situation I pray for you, that’s some hard shit and the work or creating a circle of people to rely on outside your family is honestly grueling unless you’re super duper lucky and fall into it. So I wish you the best either keeping your family in a healthy way as much as you can or going out and finding one.
Yes I’m projecting a little but really wish you the best

No. 1705698

>>1705682
Haha I used to laugh at thoughts like that and how it had a grip on me because I quit so good (lol) but I gave in one day and I swear it’s harder to quit this time, please don’t succumb!

No. 1705700

>>1705670
You need to make it clear to her that you won't support her and she has to get a job/be frugal. Fuck her culture, it doesn't sound like she's been a good enough parent that you'd look after her purely out of love and gratitude. I'm sure you wouldn't want her out on the streets but you should at least bluff and maybe she will get her shit together. If she doesn't, you can ultimately still help her but you should still try to avoid the situation.

I really hate entitled parents, they chose to create life and they owe their kids far more than their kids owe them.

No. 1705716

>>1704713
I have an older sister who hates my guts for no reason as well. She doesn't act as direct or as violent as yours but she definitely picks fights with me over nothing. I cant even talk to her stupid ass because she takes a chance to misconstrue everything I say to pick a fight with me. In the past decade we have never had an actual conversation without getting into an argument. It's not even me, she has just always been this way. She 100% has mean girl bully energy, but never became a bully to anyone but me bc she was raised in a poor abusive household and so was a victim to bullying. She is fake as fuck and clings to superficial people to seem interesting. I honestly think that shes ashamed of her family to the point that she outright rejects all of her close family members, and that this mindset grew in her childhood. And she used me as an outlet for all of her frustration because I was the most meek of our siblings as a child. But unlike what she was expecting I stood up for myself when she would pick on me so it pisses her off. She now has a such a deep seated hatred for me she can't have a healthy relationship with me even as an adult who's moved away from all that shit. She talks shit about me to other family members behind my back, and plays mean girl bestfriend to her favorite sibling (our eldest sister), who's I'm not allowed to have a relationship with in her eyes. I realize now I was deprived of friends as a child partially bc she didnt want me to have any. She told me in high school that I just "lived to annoy her". She rammed a chair in my fucking nose when we were arguing as kids and gave me a massive nose bleed. I'm pretty sure my nose is all crooked bc of that. She threw a book in my face another time when we were arguing as teenagers and I told her she was the spawn of satan. I'm not allowed to have good news or woes. If shes feeling nice she'll give me a meager compliment to seem friendly, but otherwise ignore me. She tried to make it out like my min wage cleaning job wasn't difficult compared to her being a stahm to her only child. Which, bitch, I didn't even say your life wasn't fucking hard I was just sharing my woes about my life but I'm not even allowed to do that.

No. 1705723

>>1705643
Nonnie, it sounds like you come from a very violent household. As someone that can (unfortunately) relate, it's so hard to unlearn not resorting to violence. Another thing is, as long as you are still living with your family, and they are also still resorting to violence, sometimes it's unavoidable to defend yourself. You may have done something that was 'technically' immoral, but you also have to defend yourself. I don't wanna presume stuff about you, but if your family is like mine, your parents are also violent. Really, the blame should be on them for raising your siblings to be like this to you. I wish I had good advice for you, but the best I can say is to limit contact with your family so you have less confrontations. My heart breaks for you. It's a hard place to be in.

No. 1705734

Do people who continue to complain to one person (like an outlet) not realize how fucking tiring it is for the other person? It feels like everyone in my life has done this to me since I could understand how to fucking talk. My grandparents, my parents, my bestfriend, acquainted.

Like, I don't mind it if someone I love is getting something off of their chest but it's really draining when all they do is complain about the same thing repeatedly, and when I try to ease them it or tell them what they want it doesn't make them stop, and when I give them the obvious solutions they shut me the fuck down and use the "I do (x) for you and this is how you repay me" or the "But you complain too" yeah I'm fucking aware I do but I don't do THIS. I've been mentally drained for so long thanks to the negativity these retards always handed to me during development stages, darker stages of my life AND present time. I think this is exactly why I have no patience for people anymore

No. 1705816

Found a hot influencer who is my type and actually seemed like he has a personality but he has an Onlyfans so he’s either gay or a massive BPDchan probably both

No. 1705820

File: 1695529232354.gif (9.22 MB, 1694x956, IMG_4532 (1).gif)

Still one of my favorite gifs to grace the site kek

No. 1705828

File: 1695530506552.jpg (9.94 KB, 204x250, looking.jpg)

>going through small comment section on a video that's a thrist comp.
>most comments are from obvious minors

Wish I could rat them out to their parents. Dumbass kids shouldn't be watching that or posting themselves on the internet.

No. 1705829

File: 1695530554654.jpg (71.01 KB, 1080x607, 1660121945740.jpg)

Why did I have to be born at the worst time to be heterosexual. The men i like(porn free) havent existed for at least two decades. All i want is a cute porn-free dork. 20 years ago it would have been dead easy to snatch some heavily sheltered moid who didnt even oogle at a playboy magazine, and mold it into a perfect husband, now it's impossible to find a man that doesn't have an outright porn addiction. All of the anti-porn men i have meet are also disgusting, they need daddy peterson to tell them porn bad, but not bad because it's abusive to women, it's bad for the poow poow moid's mental health. I feel so defeated, I wil go draw men getting raped and beaten to calm down.

No. 1705854

I have to come to terms with the fact that I have the spergs. Not in a quirky self diagnosed way either but in a truly socially retarded sense. The shame of it comes in waves and I just want to wallow in it sometimes. At least I'm decently intelligent, but what's the point if I know deep in my soul I am an insufferable asperger ridden woman who rambles like a crazy person about the dumbest little shit. I can't be authentic with people because I'm literally annoying as fuck if I get too comfortable. Other women sometimes think I'm stuck up and refuse to engage with them because of it. I'm just desperately trying to hide the social retardation with quiet emotionlessness.

No. 1705884

File: 1695537153187.gif (104.22 KB, 220x123, OylDpE.gif)

I am severely mentally ill about a topic I made an online friend about and I need to go cold turkey on the topic for my own well-being (because I am actually for real unwell and unable to just enjoy things normally) but I don't know what to say to the friend. We're not close and she's very very nice but we haven't ever clicked outside of this topic so it's not like this is a relationship that has any chance of continuing but I feel bad just ghosting her (especially bc she knows another account I have and remain active on). What do I do? I want to tell her I can't talk about our topic anymore and bid her an apologetic farewell but it would make me look incredibly mentally disordered and
1) that shits embarrassing
2) she doesn't need to be subjected to that or know how unwell i am because we're just acquaintances
But I can't think up any other lie to cover for my real issue. Seriously, what do I do? I don't want to be an asshole but I also don't want to be TMI.

No. 1705891

>>1705884
Hard to say without knowing what the topic is but I don't think you could go wrong with just letting her know you're taking a break or losing interest in the topic but she's free to contact you on the other account if she wants to talk about other stuff.

No. 1705930

I can't help but think that my friend has had it very easy in life. Her parents are still together after many years, she has siblings who care about her, it is as if she had lived in a bubble and that is reflected today in her personality. She is an extremely stubborn and proud person, having a disagreement with her is ending up arguing with her.
When she has a different opinion than others, she is not able to accept that there are different points of view. In almost 30 years of life, she continues to depend on her parents and does not realize how lucky she has been, she always tries to sell the story that she has had a very bad time and has suffered a lot. The other day she began to test the waters with the possibility of having had depression, saying that she had never been diagnosed but that she was almost certain that she maybe there was something wrong with her in the past.
I have tried to commit suicide twice. If you "believe" that you have a Problem, if you have that power of "decision" about whether you are depressed or not, I think that speaks for itself.
It's tiring. It’s tiring because she does not realize that she has grown up as a person with no capacity for self-criticism whatsoever. She doesn't have long, stable relationships because people get tired of her arrogance, but she is convinced that it is never her fault.
The day her parents are gone, she will be hit by the reality of having a little girl mentality in an adult's body. It pisses me off because I had a pretty hard life compared to hers but she’s incapable of admitting it. Every time I tried to talk to somebody about my past, she brushed it off and told me I’m just rejoicing in my pain.

No. 1705937

File: 1695543040145.jpg (28.96 KB, 735x559, 451d500bac9f4bf4a7242dfb4370e0…)

>>1705829
Idk what advice or encouraging words I would have for this because I don't have any viable one.
The few porn free men i know are either christians or alt righters who will justify other ways of abuse of women through muh vALuEs aNd muh tRaDItiOn and my gut feeling usually tells me that they are coomers in secret so there is no winning at this point.
>they need daddy peterson to tell them porn bad, but not bad because it's abusive to women, it's bad for the poow poow moid's mental health.
Also waa waa, makes your dick not work anymore waa waa. At least it shows that they don't care about women at all and we're fully justified to not want them near ourselves i guess.

No. 1705971

>>1700085

what was the case? can you link to it?

No. 1705972

>>1705937
The winning part is realizing you don't need men for a fulfilling life, now if only more women realized that we could settle down in female-only platonic partnerships or communities.

No. 1705977

>>1705972
i am the OP, and while i agree, i am still cursed by heterosexuality and sometimes i really wanna grab some moid from twitter and fuck him. i wont, but it crosses my mind someday.

No. 1705984

I've been trying to get books from libgen for weeks now and eerytime I try I get a 503 error!

No. 1705994

File: 1695549287639.gif (982.76 KB, 500x280, tumblr_mzjusnd0ru1ql5yr7o1_r1_…)

I have got to stop lurking on social media because I get my feelings hurt every single time. I haven't felt this envious in a while. Also happen to be in my luteal phase so I'm feeling extra fucking crazy. I just want to sleep for the rest of the year.

No. 1705995

It frustrates me how low effort the "humor" in fandoms are even when it's all grown women. Every single fandom makes the same jokes and slaps the pictures of characters onto the same textposts even when it makes no sense. The posts most interacted with are ooc text post stuff. People copy pasting vine quotes even though it doesn't fit the character. Likening all calm characters to a "mother" even though he can't and won't take care of other people if his life depended on it. It's always recycled jokes and repeating the american slang of the month. Is it that all people with the attention span to come up with funny jokes have left the fandom from agony at seeing these?

No. 1706016

I have noticed my friends who have been prescribed adderall for years are all like shells of their former selves. it’s like they became selfish and secretive sometimes they’ll talk badly about our other friends who smoke weed or drink alcohol but for whatever reason crushing up and parachuting your prescription medication is totally fine. I don’t think that’s a medication that’s meant for long-term use and I wish there were more studies performed on how this shit wrecks personalities and friendships.

No. 1706049

I hate being sick, if I could have one wish come true I'd wish to never in my life be sick or injured again.

No. 1706061

Its so hard to make friends. Women love to pretend they’re kind and open to everyone but once they’re settled in their cliques you can never actually become friends with any one of them

No. 1706067

File: 1695562996740.png (277.75 KB, 1024x895, AAAAAAAAAA.png)

I am so tired of writing emails. I am a socially incapable autist who already has a hard time doing small talk with friends, writing formal emails is a herculean task for me. Every single time I have to write one my brain goes in fully paranoia mode thinking that I might have made a grammar mistake, I accidentally wrote something rude or that I made the content too short or too long. Every time I have to sit down and write an email it takes me like 40 minutes just to type like two short paragraphs because I am constantly overthinking whatever I write. And then, whenever I actually get the courage to stop overthinking and actually send the damn thing, I spend like ten minutes dying of anxiety while praying to whoever is out there that the person receiving it won't get a bad opinion of me for some reason. I cannot do this anymore. I hate bothering people with my existence by sending them emails. Sometimes I find myself wishing I could become a hermit just so I don't have to deal with this kind of stress anymore

No. 1706068

im giving it one last shot. and because its a last shot, that means it doesnt have to last forever, i dont have to do it all my life.

if it goes wrong and i am rejected and or cause horrible pain to another, well thank fucking god, i dont have to do this shit my whole life.

if it goes right and now im in love again getting laid, i wont have to give it one last shot ever again.

ive been avoiding eyes, keeping silent, minimalizing and only projecting the best side of me. i want to show them i am human, and i am fucked up, and i am only asking for very little, i know i didnt ask for it before today, but now i am asking for very little, do you feel the same? can you hear me?

No. 1706069

>>1706061
Sounds like a you-problem. There's a limit on how many close friendships people can maintain at once and a friend group, or "clique" as you put it, falls apart eventually if it keeps on expanding with new people endlessly. That doesn't make them unkind.

No. 1706071

>>1706069
Shut the fuck up retard

No. 1706072

>>1706071
lmao no.

No. 1706080

>>1706061
Also I feel like if you dont fit into a certain box that they’re used to they quietly shun you
Instead of being direct with what they dont like they just ignore your existence with false niceness

No. 1706085

>>1706080
this is so true

No. 1706092

>>1706080
You sound autistic.

No. 1706099

>>1706092
and you sound like a stupid bitch

No. 1706102

>>1706099
Kek you went straight for the throat, I love it

No. 1706105

>>1706099
That's what I'd rather be out of the two.

No. 1706113

File: 1695568143043.jpg (63.94 KB, 748x675, tumblr_psxa1hbUWL1vkts49_1280.…)

I love long hair. Everyone else loves long hair, too, and the women that have it are considered feminine and beautiful. I want to have long hair as well. Long hair is easier to style and care for.
Except I was cursed with facial proportions that make me look like a frumpy Mennonite horse girl and founding father at the same time if my hair gets anywhere past my shoulders. Even a very long bob (idk what they're called, a Robert?) looks worse than a regular one.
Tell me why my berries and cream arse grew out hair for years and years coping with different hairstyles, trying not to look like a Victorian schoolmarm, being mistaken for a 'mature student' in my spring years, and STILL didn't cop on to the fact that it just doesn't work. When will I learn? All those years wasted on looking dumpy, I hate myself.

No. 1706116

>Saturday night
>bf and I decide to get high on mushroom tea that I made
>we watch Everything Everywhere All At Once with our pets
>have a great emotional cry, holding hands and cuddling together
>perfect, also I love this movie
>ends at 2am
>wore cute lingerie in bed but it looks like we may be too tired to make love or whatever, not that we did not twice prior that day
>"Ok bf, I think it's time for bed, I am going to the bathroom right quick."
>come back several minutes later
>hear a pathetic yelp as I walk back into bedroom that I thought was my dog
>it was bf who put on Skinamarink and had psyched himself out
>I feel bad that he got so scared so I make jokes and try to make him laugh
>also Skinamarink is up its own ass and is NOT scary
>without knowing shit about the movie I said it gave off family annihilator vibes which pissed bf off that I had guessed so much about it?
>he laughed at my commentary at first but over time he got more defensive
>for some reason bf takes great offense that I am not getting into this movie
>calls me names like "asshole," etc cause he thinks I am being pretentious that idgaf about this tryhard movie and was not giving it a chance
>in reality I think his ego was just bruised that the first 10 minutes of this unscary movie got him
>humor him and try to shut up to finish this dumb movie but more and more I wish he would just joke around with me cause it's fun…
>it's such a painfully bad movie as he comes to realize
>accuses me of trolling him when I insist we watch the last 40 minutes to the end
>(bc I am curious how the shit movie ends)
>yes he is legitimately angry at me that I "made" us watch the movie he put on
>tell him to dial back calling me names for no damn reason and he apologizes for that, at least
>movie ends
>he reups the shroom tea and starts drinking whiskey despite it being almost 4am
>my mistake: I did not stop him
>he starts to take melatonin and I take some too and ask him to come to bed
>but clearly substances had made him agitated and he did not go to bed with me
>even though I said I would be ok if he put on music to fall asleep to he got up to pace the apartment with his headphones on to be in his own feelings

He woke me up once for this confession that he tried to kill himself when I broke up with him for the very same thing before he got too drunk and was being an asshole to me so I put my foot down. That's why I am the only serious girlfriend to have ever met his mom because she flew in during his crisis and hospital sectioning. He said there was a stain under the bed from that night and if we could work to remove it. I gave him a hug and apologized to him for not knowing, but reminded him it was very late (5am..) and to come to bed when he was ready.
It kind of hurt my feelings to wake up at 10am today to discover he had passed out in the other room. He came to bed with me eventually but still.
Why are men so emotionally fragile and cannot self-regulate their substances? I give him an inch and yet he takes it way too far. Hell. We visited his family friend for MMA/football earlier in the day and we pathetically had to regulate that scrote's alchy intake too per his wife. Cause even a guy who makes six figures in the revenue industry cannot fucking control himself.

I want to cut loose too but it seems like every time I do with a man around, I am the one who winds up comforting him.

No. 1706117

>>1706080
I feel like this. How do I stop feeling like this? Yes I'm an autist and have never had proper friends
However, the illusion of moid "friendship" has shattered so I have to actually deal with this feeling now

No. 1706119

>>1706113
>Even a very long bob (idk what they're called, a Robert?)
a lob

No. 1706120

>>1706105
But you sound like both?

No. 1706122

>>1706113
what hair type do you have? is it super wavy and frizzy? i got a brazilian blowout that turned my hair super straight. everyone compliments my hair now, before i got it done my hair was super frizzy and wavy and it just looked really bad. it was super puffy and i just looked unkempt and messy, maybe you can get a bb done too

No. 1706128

>>1706120
Kek sure anon.

No. 1706130


No. 1706136

>>1706122
It's actually quite thick and straight. I don't know why short bobs and voluminous curls both look good on me and not anything else, but when my hair was long it lacked volume and overwhelmed my face a lot. Updos also looked kind of limp and matronly. I looked really ugly and plain, my facial features really popped as soon as I cut it. Maybe the Kibbe girlies have a point.
I don't really know how to style my hair and it can't hold a decent curl either so the bob really is the easiest option.

No. 1706190

>>1706113
>a Robert
Nonna, I am chortling so hard. Long bobs SHOULD be called Roberts.

No. 1706193

>>1706113
at least you know what looks good on you. I have no idea what to do with my hair. feels like I'm going to be ugly no matter what I do with it.

No. 1706201

I'd really like to stop having nightmares about my loved ones being their worst selves in public and me having to smooth things over and not look like a massive jerk doing so. The part I especially hate is their dream behavior is 1:1 accurate with their real behavior. I know it's my brain trying to tell me important stuff but fuck I hate it and just want it to stop.

No. 1706213

waiting for the new celebricows thread but nary a wherewithal to make one…I will contribute more soon my sisters
my brain is falling away like a wet cake