File: 1562523152958.jpg (166.98 KB, 1024x768, RebeccaCollage.jpg)
Rebecca Hitching, 23, is the most popular blogger on the Swedish emo messageboard, Emocore - where she posts daily. She is a lolcow strong enough to break international borders, and I've decided to share her lunacy with you all. Will regularily translate her milky blogposts if there is interest.
About: > self diagnosed autism, self diagnosed PTSD, is a huge autist > DDLG + BDSM enthusiast, dirty talk in broken english > polyamorous, has three younger boyfriends, abuses all of them, freaks out when they don't give her enough attention> world's worst sex worker, filmed one sex tape, reviews any dick pic sent to her for 50SEK (6$) > lives with her parents, got fired from her job after putting off an important assignment for TWO WEEKS> has a leafy-like putrid chin, overbite, slight unibrow and an exceptional haircut> can't keep friends without sleeping with them - complains about having slept with everyone (>10 people) invited to her party> makes out with several people every event - gets jealous when her boyfriends go on dates> has panic attacks> constantly overshares about her sex life
Boyfriend list (newest to oldest):
Gustav - right now the favourite. The least beta of the three. Still does whatever she tells him to do, male feminist. Probably pounds the other two boyfriends.
Daniel - vegan stereotype, keeps two cute rescued pigs. Has a sex tape with her, parts of it available on her twitter. Hates him after he disrespected her in their DnD-campaign. He still mopes about hurting her feelings. Has panic attacks. Only other one with an Emocore-blog.
Emil - in her words, "the least toxic
male i've ever met". Encouraged her to stop using condoms with Gustav. She doesn't see him as a man. Has panic attacks.
Porn twitter (english): https://twitter.com/kittywithissues
File: 1562523217101.jpg (88.06 KB, 974x386, Transl1.JPG)
Gustav invited me to his sisters graduation, which was a bit tense since I haven't been to his house in two weeks, ever since his dad said that I wasn't welcome anymore due to my polyamory. I thought that it'd be better to meet his parents again "for the first time" at a graduation with 20 people there, instead of just us four around an awkward dinner table. So I was a bit excited that maybe things would be able to go back to being normal again. I miss Gustavs dog and his bathtub, and I don't think my mom is very approving of someone sleeping over here 6/7 days a week.
Gustav talked to his mom and sisted yesterday, and I think it's best I don't come. For his dad's sake. They'd sooo like to have me there, but it'd just be too much for the dad.
I don't understand how Gustav can just accept it. How "it's new, so it hard for him, he's extra sensitive right now" is an excuse. Would he accept it if his dad would welcome me due to my bisexuality? Probably not.
Because I'm poly it's alright to exlude me, because it's bothering someone else. Because it's me who was to change, hide who I am, tone myself down, not be welcome at parties, to fit someone elses (read: middle age white men's) frame of how to act.
I hate men so much. (I hate myself so much). I hate norms so much.
(Translator's note: Her sentence structure is at times really bad and confusing to read, so I'm paraphrasing when I need to for clarity)
File: 1562523239403.jpg (86.16 KB, 808x376, Transl2.JPG)
cw sex 6 times a day
One thing I love with Gustav!!! We have sex like five times a day!! It's not that it lasts very long and we only come around 1-2 times a day, but sometimes we just randomly have sex for 2-5 minutes due to one of us being to teasing and the other one growing tired of it. So we have INTENSIVE aggro-sex for five minutes before stopping and just… letting it go. Satisfied with just five minutes. Then sometimes, 1-2 times a day we have "proper" sex that lasts for 30+ min and atleast one of us comes.
But like when we had just stopped using a condom, then it was like 5 times per hour.
So nice with a guy that doesn't have to come every time they have sex. That can have sex just because it's nice.
Less fun is the few times I get the idea to have sex properly and he's like "no, you get five minutes, then I'm going to sleep" and I'm like :(( but I want cock </3
Not at all sexually frustrated right now.
But so funny when you're alone in the apartment and randomly get pushed up against a kitchen shutter (?) because you were too sexy when you were waiting for tea water.
Aaah, he's so good <3 <3
File: 1562523299534.jpg (73.05 KB, 799x285, Transl3.JPG)
Tw abuse, kinda
Gustav took a hold of my neck, a bit too hard, at the wrong time.
I laid , like petrified, shaking for over ten minutes.
What do you mean PTSD? I don't know what you're talking about. I don't have PTSD. Nonono…
I'm okay now though, that's what makes me think that it's ptsd and not just "normal" anxiety. When something triggers me in THAT way I feel horrible for everything from ten minutes to three days, but when it goes away it goes away. Because really, Gustav trying to dominate a little too hard at the wrong time? Not a problem. Would it be spanking I'd just sniff at him and he'd stop it. But when it reminds me of something that happened long ago I'm not really upset about what he did now. I'm upset about something that happened fifteen years ago. That's why Im as okay now as I was an hour ago. Maybe even more, because now I can start the coping of a trigged I didn't even know I had. One step closer to feeling better.
File: 1562523337599.jpg (80.63 KB, 799x266, transl4.JPG)
Wrote to Gustav and was like "I don't wanna fall asleep without you", and he called me and was like "I was invited to eat with a friend in Malmö but I'm driving right now, and I'm like what? It's in the middle of the night, you were supposed to message me when you were off work? And you're going to go eat instead?? He's going to say that he thought I was sleeping. But he didn't even message me.
And I'm kind of in shock. This is something I expected from Emil or Daniel, that they don't really think about the consequences but like… Gustav? Not caring about it? I… almost can't believe it. And I'm scared. Am I going to be in another one of those now? Was it only in the beginning that he really tried? Maybe he doesn't care that much.
He's going to apologise and I'm going to feel so bad that I won't even feel that I have the right to be grumpy about it, so I'll be grumpy about it now instead. It feel weird, and I'm scared. Probably a bit oversensitive right now because tired, but yeah… scared. That he'd be like the others. Normally I'd be angry but right now I'm just sad. I can't take it. I don't want to.
(Editor's note: How are you this upset about him not having time to see you? It's not like you had anything planned)
File: 1562523362662.jpg (41.49 KB, 783x283, Transl5.JPG)
It's going alright with Daniel I guess.
He thought I was mean. I don't like how he never remembers anything, including the things I ask him to do/not do.
The conclusion was apparently "Either it solves itself naturally because we're aware of the problem or it won't be solved because none of us can demand that the other changes their personality."
Like, I've been mean the entire time. It's kind of my thing. He can't help forgetting stuff.
Nothing more to do about it I guess, except being aware about it and seeing if you can naturally adjust yourself to be better without changing your "personality".
File: 1562523385583.jpg (166.82 KB, 811x525, Transl6.JPG)
(From Daniel's blog)
Punkparty in helsingborg cw sex, alcohol
God damn that was a boring party.
The party started at 19, but I'd had guests over so I arrived at 22:30. Inside the apartment I find Diana and another dude sitting and drinking, and another girl in the bathroom… 3 people, that's it. Diana hadn't invited 160 people this time (better safe than sorry). So Diana and Rebecca had been drinking so fucking much and was wasted. Not wasted enough to slur their speeches, but enough to not be shrieky and obnoxious. We talked about how diana had been trying to turn her life around, which is good for her, but she restated the same sentence for 30 minutes and no one else was allowed to say a word. Rebecca was triggered when we mentioned suicide and called her friends that were on their way to comfort her. I followed her out to greet them. We all went up to the apartment but the friends weren't exactly nice to Diana so the mood got weird. The friends left and Diana started to drink more. This led to her wanting to puke, but she's really afraid to do exactly that, so I had to help her push her fingers down her throat. And when that didn't work, I had to try with my fingers down her throat. She was very reluctant and refused to listen when I said that she wouldn't die in her own vomit. After 10-15 min we gave up.
She said she wanted to go out to find a lay for phyiscal comfort, whereupon she suggested that we should have sex. I, who at this time hadn't realised how drunk she really was, said "fine" to this. During sex she turns away to try to puke. When she rises again she says she doesn't remember anything that happened tonight. Not even us having sex 30 seconds ago. After that I stopped and tried to get her to sleep.
When it was time to sleep it legit took 1 1/2 hours to get her to stop screaming and saying she'll die in her own vomit. She peed in the puke-bucket and blew her nose in the sheets. But finally she was asleep. Then I hear the dude from earlier and Rebecca having sex in the bed next to me. This woke up Diana who complained about the noise and started to scream again.
It was now 6 o clock and everyone was awake. Rebecca doesn't remember just having sex, but she was ok with this, as was Diana. I went to bed again, I was done with the day and just wanted to sleep.
Thank you, cya.
File: 1562528720725.jpg (172.53 KB, 721x880, transl7.JPG)
(First part of the post is boring family-stuff)
But yesterday we had a family trip! Me, mom, Samuel (younger brother), Gustav and Steve (Uncle). First to Torup for a walk in the woods and dorking around on the obstacle course there. I actually got all of them to get through the entire course and it was SO EXHAUSTING, my whole body is hurting.
- picture -
Most exhausting was almost having to resist the impulse to call Gustav "Daddy" when I didn't dare to get over some obstacles myself :)))) I'm not afraid of heights, alright, but I'm rediculously afraid to fall/jump down things even if they're only half a metre up in the air. He had to hold my hand! It was scary!
We were all super sweaty afterwards, and we were going to a restaurant in the evening. We had heard that Mandos was one of Malmös best meat restaurants but… had a steak and… so disappointed. So tasteless.
Had a sensory overload too, shut down completely, as you probably read about yesterday. Overall a great day though! Hadn't seen Steve for like two years! Obstacle courses are the best too! I love trees! Woho, fun stuff!!!
…Now me and Gustav are going to bed to sleep the rest of the weekend, though. So tireeed
(Imagine being her parents when their 23 year old daughter is acting like a child in front of them and wants to call her bf daddy the entire time)
File: 1562622659627.jpg (15.99 KB, 338x115, transl8.JPG)
My hand is sore from Gustav squeezing it too hard :)))
The drawback with strong but sensitive men.
(Think he cried over the new star wars trailer too?)
File: 1562622681734.jpg (70.3 KB, 735x456, transl9.JPG)
The people who'll be at my party cw self hatred
1. Guy I've slept with
2. Guy I've slept with + his friend who I don't know.
3. Guy I'm sleeping with right now
4. Guy I'm sleeping with right now
5. Nb I'm sleeping with right now
6. Guy who I've made out with who wants to sleep with me wow
The people who "may" be there
1. Guy I've slept with
2. Girl that's with a guy I'm sleeping with right now
3. Guy I want to sleep with
4. Girl I want to sleep with
5. Girl that's with a guy I've slept with
6. My boss who wants to sleep with me + a guy and a girl who I don't actually want to sleep with wow
I've been anxious about this all day. Don't want people to be there and realise that I don't actually have any friends. An old friend from school's going to be there. He'll notice that. There probably wont be a single girl there.
Like, I invited platonic relationships too. I Invited people who I've for a long time thought I should be speaking with more often. But they won't come, obviously. Because why hang out with me if there isn't a chance to get sex. I'm obviously not good for anything else.
Good self confidence today yeah woho
File: 1562625591606.jpg (232.17 KB, 750x608, IMG_0062 2.jpg)
I found this comment on a Swedish girl group ”Pink Room” on Facebook.
The question was ”Do you think it’s ok to not love your parents?”
I’ll translate for you guys. She can’t write for shit so I’ll do my best.
”I stopped loving my parents when I was around 12/13 y/o, blood relations mean nothing to me. I don’t love my little brother either, I don’t know why I would. I don’t understand how you could love someone just because you are related. I don’t have anything against my mother or my brother, they’re nice but love? No. I’ve loved two-three people in my adult life and they’ve been partners and maybe my best friend”
Imagine living this sad life.
If her relatives are abusive
then I understand, but not otherwise.
File: 1562626388663.png (Spoiler Image, 421.97 KB, 584x535, Skärmavbild 2019-07-09 kl. 00…)
She's trying to sell porn on twitter but is failing miserably.
She wouldn't call them nice if they were abusive
I don't think
File: 1562670398118.png (41.56 KB, 574x190, Skärmavbild 2019-07-09 kl. 00…)
I found this post on Twitter. She hasn't sold any of her porn.
you forgot to say everyone involved look like incels, no one even want to see them bang.>>833917>>834202
She dares to tag that mess shibari?! She is not even trying properly, then complains her porn doesn't sell.
File: 1562708667991.jpg (146.91 KB, 728x517, transl10.JPG)
(Daniel's blog really is a different perspective on Rebecca. This one highlights just how whacky she is. It's about the party where only people who've had sex with her are invited)
Party chaos tw anxiety/panic attack, taking rape for granted
So rebecca had a party this friday.
I had gotten off work around an hour before the party, around 16, and had to walk around in malmö until 18.30 because rebecca had her new date, G (gustav), "visiting". I don't have anything against taking a walk and I even had some fun. 18.26 o clock I get to the apartment and take a shower. I get out of the shower and all 3 of us joke around and banter and start drinking a little.
Rebecca had anxiety about only people who want to or are already sleeping with her are coming, so I asked a few of my friends if they could come, but they sadly all had plans or weren't home. An hour later Emil shows up and even more fun and drinking follows. 2 other arrive after that. Johan and David. (I have no idea who these people are)
Everyone is having fun until it starts to get late, then we start to talk about feminism and more specifically #metoo. I don't exactly remember what David said but it was something like the whole #metoo was started for the purpose of people taking power away from their bosses and that we was scared that as a white, hetro, cis male, he'd be put in the same category as rapists - #notallmen to 100%. Rebecca comes in and gives him a scolding, i join in. She demands that he leaves the apartment and takes his stuff with him. During the 5 min it takes from the couch to the door David was yelling and complaining that all feminists are unfair and not reasonable. Rebecca slammed the door shut and came running to me, crying. Emil and G came and held her with me. Johan went home.
We sat on the floor for a long time and I remember feeling so powerless, I wanted to say that it'd all be okay, but I remember that the last time I did that she got angry because I was lying. Luckily, G hadn't had that conversation, so he did it instead. We sat there and hugged and I tried to make her feel better. Efter a while they sat on the couch while I went down to give David the glass he forgot.
I knock on his door on the floor below and he opens, frustrated. I give him the glass and he mutters some curse words. Halfway up the stairway he opens again and says something about "how can you treat me like this?". I enter his apartment and explains to him that he belittled everyone who'd genuinely been raped. We have a discussion but I notice it being fruitless so I ask him to meditate and then go and join the others again.
(This guy just got aggressively thrown out of their party for something saying something stupid they disagreed with, to me this seems super petty and exaggerated. I like the mental image of all her three boyfriends holding her, while she is crying about something someone said.)
tbf all of the men sleeping with her are also extremly ugly.
This whole thing is such a mess. You swedes still have those diary type blogs? In 2019?
File: 1562906175848.jpg (717.67 KB, 1080x1380, 20190711_213148.jpg)
S.H.A.R.P. skinhead - "Skinheads Against Racial Prejudice (SHARP) are anti-racist skinheads who oppose neo-fascists and other political racists, particularly if those racists identify themselves as skinheads. SHARPs draw inspiration from the biracial origins of the skinhead subculture, and resent what they see as the hijacking of the "skinhead" name by white power skinheads (sometimes deriding them as "boneheads"). Beyond the opposition to racism, there is no official SHARP political ideology."
I had to look it up
also don't rub your cooch on public spaces, god
File: 1563101125215.jpg (124.36 KB, 675x1200, putrid.jpg)
She's got a new dress and is looking putrid
Why would you pretend to be a skinhead and post on a site about emos…
Skinheads in real life would make fun of her. Skinhead culture is based on music and specific clothing (fred perry etc). She just looks out of a flea market.
I really want to know more about her and her bad chelsea haircut, delicious milk from a skinhead perspective.
File: 1563131977350.jpg (102.22 KB, 737x849, Transl11.JPG)
(This one's horribly written in swedish which makes it difficult to translate)
Like, I've for so long missed having a partner I actually match my style with. Have gotten jealous of Sanella who talks about how good her guys look and like, mine doesn't dress HORRIBLY (Patrik was even so handsome and wore a suit on a weekday) but they didn't MATCH me. It never felt like we'd be seen as "an item", like in those bad high-school-movies.
But Gustav is going to dress more like a skinhead and I'm going to die and we're going to be so pretty together -
Also, we have started to shave each others heads like very month. Goals.
Imagine him dressed like this
Like AHHH, soaked immediately
- 2 pictures -
Sincerely, i've had a thing for suspenders since like forever but the only YOUNG men who actually wear them are skins so like??? 10/10 luhv it.
File: 1563132883465.jpg (121.11 KB, 731x407, Transl12.JPG)
I was going to have "the meeting" right now but wrote him 18.02 and he was like "yes, soon, wait a bit". I'm like ok I HAVE THINGS TO DO, FOOD TO COOK, YALLA!! (ok he wrote like ten past, in the middle of writing the list down below so it didn't take TOO long for him to get back to me)
But it feels like I'm picking up side jobs on side jobs???? Like?? Soon I'll have 5 or something.
1. Sale of amateur porn. Can't stop won't stop!! Even if I was to stop promoting or filming new as often I'd like never stop doing customs when my VIP's want me to.
2. The chat job. Don't neeeed to work more than 2 hours a week with it but if I remember correctly you get a good bonus if you work atleast… eight? Don't remember, but might as well take the bonus most weeks, since the salary is pretty worthless if I don't.
3. Got a tip about a user testing side by sovplatsen (I don't know who this is, the name means "place to sleep", which implies that she uses him only for a place to sleep). His company uses it apparently??? I'm used to advertisement about "testing new products and getting gift cards for H&M"-stuff on facebook so I shrugged it off at first but like this is l e g i t. No idea about how much you're supposed to wrok tho. I hope it's scheduled but I doubt it. Forgot my mic at home so can't apply for it atm but :)))) He said I was good at it when I checked avioneros website, so I might as well.
4. Ksk customer support at avionero? He said he needed a new employeee from the 1st of mars and I seemed good for the service because I'm used to chatting, I'm like smart, I know computers a bit, have a good swedish and english, and carry my phone on me 24/7 so I'll almost always be able to answer withing 10 minutes. The only question is how the ffff you give a salary for that? On call 24/7 so I may have to work for five minutes 20 times a week. Idk, they may have a good idead about it. I'll probably take what they offer me, it's going to grow and grow so I'll have more things to do the more it grows! Career opportunities!
4.5 ksk usertesting for avionero, but that's only a one time thing.
So ok 4.5 different jobs
ok I like variation!! Maybe that's good for me??? We'll see idk I'm gonna go EAT now
(Funny how she lists 4.5 jobs but somehow doesn't have any form of stable income)
File: 1563133643173.jpg (50.31 KB, 697x240, Transl13.JPG)
The chat job
It's so not with it. Been working for an hour now, looked how much I'd earnt.
…Not even 40 SEK (4$ 30c)
In an HOUR?
And they've seemingly stopped with the special bonuses and stuff, the only thing left is the "weekend bonuses" of like 10 öre (1c) per message :))))
But that's what makes me earn so ridiculously little.
The website's bee super slow. They have more girls responding than men writing. You can sit and stare at a loading scren for several minutes… Back in the day I think I could get up to 70 messages per hour if I paid attentian, but here I am with 27 messages, on a friday rush hour :))))
No, screw this. If it doesn't get better next week I quit. 40SEK/h is NOT worth it.
File: 1563136002755.jpg (265.16 KB, 648x937, Transl14.JPG)
(Long post from Emil's blog, about how he's dejected and miserable now that Rebeccas found Gustav)
I'm not getting along with my brain. (CW anxiety)
Okay, I need to write a bit. This whole thing about keeping my feelings to myself is really freaking unhealthy and I'm telling people that every other day, so I guess I have to listen to myself for once. Have fun reading.
So, Rebeccas had a new partner for a while now, Gustav he's called (it says so in her blogg lol), and I'm really happy for her sake.
He's really nice, I like hanging out with him. Everything is awesome.
Ofcourse she talks about him a lot. You do that when you have a new partner. NRE and stuff. She's done that with all of her earlier partners, and she probably did it to the person she dated when she started dating me. It's fine. But at some point it all became too much.
During several weeks they hung out so much. and every time I saw her she talked a lot about him. It was fine. When it was my birthday she took me on a date and mostly just talked about him, and apologized for it several times, but it was fine. I'm only happy to see her happy.
But somewhere, slowly and gradually it became too much. Not because they hung out, but because I didn't get any time with her, nor any attention or affirmation. Or maybe I did, but I didn't feel that I did.
We had a pub night planned. Rebecca, me, Gustav, Daniel. And a girl I dated a while ago, but didn't really hit it off with because I didn't have the energy to invest in more than one serious relationship. It was comfy and we had fun. But during much of the night I felt a bit excluded. Both on the way there and while being there. Afterwards we went home to the girl I used to date (I'll have to make up a name for her. Ehh… Green. Because she has green hair right now. I'm smart.).
Either way, we went home to Green and were all a bit tipsy. We danced, talked, drank and had fun. Obviously the night got a bit kinky, cause we're us. I still feel a bit left out though. Like I'm mostly there because it'd be mean to to include me. I tried to shake it off, because anxiety does that to you and it's stupid. But it was mostly Gustav, Rebecca and Green who was active. I know Daniel feels left out too here, and it took a lot of his brain capacity this last month, but I have to let him care for himself to not go crazy.
Ether way. After I while I got a bit anxious, and handled it by more or less lying in the couch and letting my brain shut off so that I can sleep (My superpower when I'm drunk? I dunnk). And noticed the three of them entering Greens room.
Long story short, they had a threeway, how awesome for them.
It is awesome, and absolutely nothing I have a problem with or anything, but it hurt to know that it was never anything they ever talked about including me in. The morning after I woke up at 5.30. I ofter wake up early when I'm not at home.
I sat in the kitchen in a panic for 45 minutes before getting dressed and going home.
Me and Green had gone back to her placed and kinda fooled around some poly-meetup ago, which was nice. But rebecca says "That's only because me and Gustav got her all horny and that she wanted a threeway with us". Not those exact words, but that was the message. I know she didn't mean anything with it, but it really stuck with me, and that whole thing was reapeated over and over in my head.
There was a poly-meetup shortly after and I invited Rebecca on a date before we were going there. I looked forward to spending time with her and maybe get all of this pent up stuff out. But when we met she was shaking of anxiety because of something that had happened with Gustavs parents. (Call back to the post on her blog about not being accepted by gustavs parents lol, I really like how these stories evolve paralelly like this) . I comforted her and tried to get her to talk about it. Of course that's not her fault and nothing she can do anything about. But my pent up feelings just built up more because of it during the whole poly-meetup.
I was going to "knäcke", some medieval camp event, but had to cancel. I said it was because of stress and anxiety, and that's kind of true, but I honestly don't want Gustav near me right now. And I haven't been able to say that, because it's really not his faul. It's noones fault, and because of this I've been trying to ignore it and letting it be… but that apparently doesn't solve your psychological issues… can you imagine.
I talked to Rebecca the other day and we decided to hang out this weekend so that I'd be able to feel a bit better. I hoped that I'd be able to talk to her about it and maybe get some affirmation. Both from me and rebecca. Of course it didn't turn out like that. Rebecca asked if Gustav could join and that if we could play D&D… and I said sure because how do I even work?
This led to me feeling even worse and having to go home in panic in the morning again.
Right now I'm sitting at home and feeling like shit because Green, Rebecca and Gustav is going to be at Knäcke tomorrow, and it hurts. I want them to feel good and have a good time and do whatever… but it's come to the point that my brain can't handle it.
Rebecca and I haven't had sex in over a month, and even though she of course doesn't owe me sex, it's still something that hurts. She talks a lot about her being super horny because of new relationship energy, but it's only when I'm not there.
So I asked Rebecca if she wanted to hang out when she comes back from knäcke. She said of course. But she and Gustav is going to some park party friday and wondered if I wanted to come. I said maybe… But honestly I really don't want to. A lot of people and having Gustav withing 5 miles of me isn't something I think I can handle right now.
Everything sucks. It feels rotten and my stomach has been hurting almost constantly for the last three days. I don't want to blame anyone. I don't want anyone to feel guilty and feel bad. But I want to stop feeling like this and I don't know what to do.
Atleast I've gotten to write about it a bit. That's atleast something.
(TLDR; Emil feels left out, Rebecca is spending all of her time with Gustav, she doesn't have sex with him. He's real fucking tired of having a poly relationship. She constantly talked about Gustav on his birthday date. They had a threeway with his date without him. Emil constantly apologises in the post, as if someone's holding a gun to his head. Things like "I don't want to blame anyone" constantly interjected.)
this is so cringe. She's trying to make her bf dress like a skinhead but he just ends up looking like a farmer. >>838068
so…she doesnt have a job. How skinhead-working-class of her!
File: 1563221929955.jpg (69.97 KB, 718x370, Transl15.JPG)
(And the award for the most TMI post yet goes toooooo…)
PERIODS cw a lot of TMI and sex
I am so PISSED
I just had my PERIOD
THE DAY BEFORE VALENTINE'S DAY??? AAAA THANKS
This even ruined all of my plans for my detox-diet-thingy!! I'm bloated and feeling bad even though I've only been eating fiver and have drank almost two liters of water (which is SO MUCH for me).
THE PLAN was to "surprise Daniel with actually going through with anal sex but I won't feel like it now that my belly is pissed at me! I'm pissed at it too! Like mm sry your cock doesn't fit, it's occupied with EVERYTHING I'VE ATE THE LATEST TWO DAYS (an exaggeration but I'm one of those people who get constipated at the start of their periods, which is pretty common actually, sex ed of the day)
I've not been having it and like NO IF THERE WASN'T ANY POINT IN EATING HEALTHY THEN I'LL EAT UNHEALTHY TODAY
Sincerely sitting and drinking a full glass of chocolate milk and have ate almost two pan pizzas.
And right, the underwear hasn't arrived yet. Neither have the presents. FUN VALENTINE'S DAY, EVERYTHING'S TURNING OUT GREAT
anon i love you so much for providing all this milk. Thank you so much, if you ever need something translated from french, let me know.
She's so messy. Who posts about this? Wouldnt Daniel read this and it would ruin the surprise? And then he will just have his head filled with images of her shitfull colon. Sexy.
(<3333 thanks for the appreciation guys. And yeah I think she checks EC like every hour maybe? They check it far less often, so it wouldn't necessarily mean that.
Unrelated, I just read a post talking about Gustav having a panic attack too. So all 4 people involved have panic attacks, how do you assemble such a group? It feels like all of them need to be comforted constantly, what a chore.) Tw
Was playing dungeons and dragons, like you sit around a table, roll some dice and pretend to be your character.
My character, intersex but people think she's a woman and doesn't respect her pronouns (lol imagine a medieval setting with xim/xer), has huge issues with their sexuality and is basically asexual due to a deeeep self hatred. But, she has recently been feeling more safe in her own body, and I thought she could maybe start exploring if she had a sexual side. So, she lied to her party members and went to buy a pushup-bra in secret. Nothing out of the ordinary.
The tailor, played by our DM, Daniel, was a bit creepy, nothing strange about that.
The tailor gets too handsy with my character while getting her measurements. Daniel plays this out as if it's a bit of fun. I blackout and is like, how would my character react to this??? She's shy and awkward really. But not helpless. She grabs him by the throat and burries her nails (claws) into it.
I'm still a bit vblacked out. I nearly AM the character when I play. I feel what she feels, not as strongly but it is there. So I guess she blacks out too.
She was going out to buy a bra, so she buys one some place else.
I meta-game a bit. Really don't want to play this right now but I kinda have to. She goes back to the party and tells the other to men she has been groped, and you know how men get evey time you tell them someone groped/raped you? They always have to threaten to beat the shit out of someone and you have to calm them down. So yeah, in a world where people actually beat people up on the daily? They went in and beat him up. Broke into the tailors house, threatened his life, the charisma-20-dude threatened him too, so a really high intimidate.
And I constantly tried to control how it happened, tried to get it over with, but Daniel kept trying to make things difficult. Postpone it and make it into an encounter when I said that I only wanted to "go over there and threaten him and not make a big deal out of it". But it was just a bunch of obstacles and I didn't want to THINK about it longer. Finally it was over, I didn't want to play any more, I held in an anxiety attack.
I'm right now sitting at Pizza hut and have shoved the anxiety away. For now atleast. Right now I have to think about so many things about my character I don't want to think about. Of course she's been groped before. How did she react then? Has she been raped? Probably, she hangs out with criminals. How did she react then? Does she have issues about it? Yes. How does she see it now? She is… not as "strong" as I am when it comes to standing up for youtself… I've handled the rapes better than the majority of my friends. My character would probably handle them worse.
And I don't WAN'T to think about those feeling. I don't want to explore that side of my character. But now she's been met with it, so now I have too. And why? Because Daniel thought it'd be a bit… fun? Not a big deal atleast.
I don't even know how I'm supposed to play her now. Even I break down for a few days after being harassed. She'd be broken for… I don't know how long?? Trying to find a friend that'd be there for her but I don't KNOW. I guess she'd internalise it. Not handle it. Go back to her self hatred, throw away the bra, lose all of her character progression. It was probably her fault, that she'd trust people, why would she be that stupid? Not trust the men in her group either. Turn off, become cold as before. I guess it'd be the only thing natural.
I don't wanna handle this. Especially not after what happened yesterday. (Talking about the part where a dude got violently thrown out after disrespecting the metoo-movement)
File: 1563224937097.jpg (156.08 KB, 646x582, Transl16.JPG)
Forgot pic, sorry
File: 1563225799142.jpg (86 KB, 645x319, Transl17.JPG)
(From Daniel's blog)
Date-ish? But comfy either way cw sex
Yesterday me and Rebecca were testing ourselves for STD's and as a present for me being good Rebecca wanted to treat me to a fika (Fika is a Swedish traditional coffee break in the afternoon with a pastry and something to drink)
We found a café where they served vegan sanwiches (there seemed to be very few of those in Malmö). Efter I had finished my salad on my sandwich I didn't know what to do anymore (idk what he means here), which led to us wandering around Malmö to play Pokemon Go. After an our we went to Triangeln to buy some seaweed snacks.
We had hinted about us finding a place to have sex outside, but since it was daylight outside there was also a lot of people everywhere, but now the sun had gone down.
Once more we wandered through malmö, but this time to find a good hiding place to have sex at.
We went to the first best park and found a little lake with a path hidden by bushes and darkness. Perfect we thought. But after a few tries we realised people could come and see us. So we went to a small bridge, a lot more open really, but a place that was without people. I laid her over the guardrail of the bridge which I thought was super sexy, but I guess Rebecca got a bit scared since she didn't want to bend over it with her upper body. No matter.
After a few minutes of hot bridge fucking we kept walking and found a pretty much invisible spot in a bush. At this point Rebecca was very sub so I (without telling you too many details) humiliated her until we both came.
On the way to the train home we met Emil (Rebeccas partner) and his siter that'd just goten home from Holland. I took the train home and Rebecca staid with him.
In conclusion… a good day, except that I had stomach pains on the way home.
(Imagine haning over Rebecca to her other partner after humiliating her in a bush, that's the poly way of life I guess)
File: 1576356363505.jpg (37.71 KB, 778x130, zorgish.JPG)
Oh shit guys she found out about the thread and now she's threatening me, luckily she can't prove anything
File: 1576418187517.jpeg (128.88 KB, 750x370, 02BC5DE1-E81B-4B6E-8196-4D4AB1…)
I’ve been to cubus(clothing store) and bought some panties to embroider on. I want to embroider text on the butt, but I cant decide on what I want. Thinking ”Yes, Daddy”, ”Good girl” or “lucky you”, but it feels to basic? I want something thats not the first thing you think of. Ideas?
File: 1576421601619.jpeg (819.9 KB, 1637x886, E568899D-835E-4AFA-BFBE-B7DE8B…)
I scolded Emil, kind of. It feels like I adapt more and more to him and satisfy all needs I can without hurting myself, but it is still never enough. Every time I think “ what a nice weekend we had, I almost didn’t feel pressured to have sex at all” he comes home and starts so complain. Most often about that we didn’t have sex. Do you guys know what I think the most unsexy thing is? To feel pressured to have sex. And to say “ I feel sad that we didn’t have sex when we met” is kind of pressuring. This time I thought I could be free from that pressure because of the whole I-maybe-have-chlamydia thing, but no. “We could have done something else”.
I thought that we were on the road to improvement multiple times. Like this weekend, we made out against a wall which was s e x y. But the pressure was still there, so I was like no, I don’t want to. Which he was okay with at that moment! No pressure at all! Nice, I thought, so I maybe could be more turned on next time. But no, the day before yesterday he texted and complained. “We maybe need a break”, he said. “A sex break?”, I clarified. But he didn’t know. Weather it was just a sex break or more. I was kinda crushed.
Right now i’m tired of requirements. The anger will probably not persist for long, but it feels good to rant about how he is being more and more irrational, which makes me more and more turned off. Every time we see each other it gets worse, and I can’t take it. I feel pressured to spend the night because if obvious reasons, which leads to that I don’t want to play DnD with him anymore, only because he will be sad that I don’t sleep over. Like, it’s okay to be sad but i’m getting tired of constantly needing to consider his emotional state in our friend group but never being able to do the right thing. It’s totally fine with me to put someones needs before my will, 100%. But I’ve been doing it for 6 months and only gotten complaints back. No, I can’t take it anymore.
(translators note: Meanwhile she’s having a lot of sex with Gustav and talking about it A LOT on her blog(which Emil reads). She even fucked Daniel who dumped her months ago. She is now moving in with Gustav. Good for Emil to break up as soon as possible.)
Im not the poster but here’s the translation:
Open letter to Zorgish
Report filed of your collection of truths, lies and opinions about me on an international site. Impressive how much time you’ve spent translating and contorting my life.
How much do you have to hate someone to continually carry on a smear campaign for 4 months online? Name and shame some one with their real name etc? Towards someone you used to date, was it because I didn’t want to talk to you again last year? On an international website, where nobody knows who I am? Okay, I can stand ec bullying, it’s cool. But this not okay.
File: 1576507731934.jpeg (448.18 KB, 750x1067, 290A1EF2-851F-4FC3-B91D-96EDE5…)
Do you want to see Gustav?
I felt small and like Gustav was super dominant and I wanted to capture it. Took pictures and realised how c u t e he is and omg?? Had to share.
File: 1576508530543.jpeg (87.29 KB, 750x321, 47464F92-F46E-4FE4-BBDE-F79527…)
File: 1576523581426.jpeg (356.98 KB, 750x858, 0A80EF7C-D1F0-4B8C-BB18-628ECB…)
After a failed porn twitter attempt she made a new and improved “cuckold findomme” twitter account. Do you think Emil is getting cucked?