/ot/ - off-topic

Have any grad student farmers been a supplemental instructor (SI) before? It's like tutoring but you have to 'take the class' (attend a lecture) and have study sessions with planned activities.
I saw some people from other programs (biology and math i think kek) warning against it because the workload with putting together lesson plans can be taxing and the office that heads it checks your numbers for how many students come to your sessions and can give you shit if not many are showing up. Now they said they'd waive my full tuition and give me $2k as a stipend for this semester (in a cheap state so it'll go pretty far and I live at home kek). Literally the money is the only reason I'm accepting it, am I signing my death sentence or? The job is for this semester so I figure if I hate it I just won't do it in the spring.

Grad school has practically killed me. Gonna wait till I finish my thesis to make it official though kek.

A (possibly stupid) question to any international grad student currently studying in the US - are you able to secretly keep an income on the side? I know that F-1 visas aren't allowed to have work outside whatever their school allows, but I recently video chatted with the chair of a program I'm interested in. I asked about how the international students were doing and he accidentally let slip that a few of them do freelance work in the day while attending at night. The program is funded, fortunately, but I like my freelancing/online side hustle and it would be nice to be able to keep it while studying. Feel free to tell me now if it's too risky or stupid while I'm still in the fantasizing stage; I'd appreciate it.

>>860582
Every international student I know work under the table unless daddy’s rich. Unless you’re blabbing, or someone has it out for you, the school probably isn’t invested in monitoring where your money is coming from.

>>860587

Seems like that program is full of big blabbing mouths especially this chair.

>>860587
I figured that was possible. I was paranoid imagining the government tracking my paypal and the payments made to it or something.

>>860599
Yeah, that did give me pause kek. It's not the only program I'm looking at, at least.

>>858191
At least try getting a job in industry first. It's so much better, I can't even begin to tell you.

I'm starting my masters program in the fall and I'm so nervous anons. I have my TA position lined up and even got to chat with a current student today who gave me a lot of advice. But lol social anxiety/asd/adhd is hell, any advice?

I graduated silently and now I just need to get my papers but meanwhile neetdom

>>860582
could freelance fall into OPT?

I hope to keep up with this thread as I am currently trying to finish one program (early childhood gen & sp ed) and I just got admitted to an slp part time online program. I know my career change will have me ending up in debt…

My only piece of advice is that if you have the support, work part time first before considering full time work in the field you are studying for while doing your studies. Part time jobs give you little money, but hey… Money is money and the stress is more so focused on your own studies. Good luck to all my grad school farmers out there!

>>860917
There are tons of people in grad school with mental health issues; I'd wager that the majority of PhD students have (or develop lol) some sort of condition.
If it's a taught master's then it'll be just like an extra year or two of undergrad, so if you survived that you'll be fine. If it's a research master's then there is a risk that you'll end up struggling depending on how shitty the PI and your labmates are.
Some general advice:
>imposter syndrome affects many people, especially women. recognize the signs, acknowledge that you have imposter syndrome if you develop the symptoms, and try to embody the idea that it's normal and you deserve to be there.
>if you notice that you're struggling or that your anxiety is getting worse, be proactive in getting treated for it. mental health issues can spiral out of control and deeply affect your productivity without support
>if you're doing a research master's and your PI is a shit, try to switch as soon as possible
>a lot of grad students self-medicate via substance abuse; avoid falling into that trap at all costs. if you drink then set hard limits for when you can do so
>you'll be surrounded by people who are in the same situation that you are; try to make friends early on so that you have people to share support and experiences with/vent to
>>860940
Congrats! What are your next steps? May as well enjoy the rest of the summer, but the job market is also really hot right now so you might want to take advantage of it if you're not continuing in academia.

I’m required to have internship experience in order to be able to graduate and get my bachelors degree but I’m having absolutely zero lucky in finding one and this is fucking with my head. Not many places were offering internship programs in my area even before Covid, and now it’s like 10x worse, I’m applying to every single one I see and I was able to be called to a few interviews but got no responses past that stage. I have zero networking skills and I don’t know anyone who knows anyone who can just arrange something for me, and I also don’t know what is wrong with me because I have similar skills as every other grad student applying to those programs. I guess this is more of a vent but I’d very much appreciate any advice because I’m desperate at this point. I’ll finish my course next year but the best time for me to get an internship is right now and seeing all my upper class classmates getting in those cool internship programs is deteriorating my mental state lol

>>861100
Ooooo please keep us updated nonita! I know this is a gradschool thread and I'm still in my undergrad but I'm currently studying to be an SLP and any advice/experience would be extremely helpful! Im really excited about getting into the field and I wanna know just about everything to expect.

Oh god, I’m >>861911 and JUST realized this is not an undergrad thread and now it’s too late to delete, I’m so so sorry anons!! I’m way too sleep deprived for this lol

>>861911
>>861944
What's your major? Would you be able to get credit for an internship working within your school (at a specific department or the school's foundation)? My first paid internship was technically work study at a department at my community college, but it opened a lot of doors for me.

May seem retarded to even ask but it’s never advised to date someone who’s in your program or department right? Should I turn down every guy? I’m going into a masters program and might take some phd classes as well just for reference.

>>863023
It's not particularly smart but also from experience most PIs I've met are married within the university so. Feels kinda inevitable with how much time you end up spending on a degree.

Anyways, I feel like I will literally kms, it's just a masters but I feel shit about my research, it's outcomes and how am I even supposed to write it all up. Never mind job search after it. I am so stressed out from doing this degree and having to work, I feel like alogging every cute holiday post I see on social media. I guess my advice is to consider skipping a year to save up beforehand commencing your studies so you don't have to work during lmao.

It's not even the third week of my program and I've had some old moid professor sending me flirty emails that are actual grooming shit ("I know we've never met but you're so special!"). I talked to my mentor from undergrad, showed her the emails, ranted to her a bit because it stressed me out, and she told me not to report it for now because it's pointless since it's just emails and this guy will retaliate against me and ruin my career and at least for sure badmouth my reputation within the department. This retaliation is super commonplace for women who reject male professors. Now I already feel really awkward within the department because it's a sausage-fest but the fact that there's already one professor who is so shameless like this makes me wonder how many more are thinking disgusting things about me.
I was lucky that none of my male professors in undergrad were ever creepy. But why now that I'm in grad school (at a much bigger college) is this happening? Is it because they know that you require their help and therefore are a perfect victim as opposed to an undergrad who might not need the same favors and help? Why is it suddenly okay for a man who is twice my age to joke that our zoom call is gonna be a date? And yeah he actually did that in the last email which I haven't responded to.
Initially I tried to use him emailing me as a networking opportunity but because I'm female, young, and pretty (esp young which rlly means naive) this hideous scrote won't treat me like any other student. What makes it worse is that he doesn't talk to any students aside from those who take his class maybe. But all of his published work is with other men at other schools, not with PhD or MA students. He doesn't supervise a single PhD person but is taking an interest in some super young and attractive girl while also showing no interest in other students, especially male ones!

To top it all off, you basically have to talk about this behind closed doors because consulting anonymous places like our discipline's job market forum will yield troll responses as it's overrun by incels and consistently has multiple topics on the front page that are ranting about women. It's a perfect reflection of how sexist this discipline is. Especially because while they bitch about diversity hires on there, there's male professors who are still working and have new female advisees after the school was made aware of them sexually harassing/assaulting other women. I'm so sick of men being untouchable.

>>861919
Will do! I applied for online programs, but if you are getting an undergrad in communication disorders or speech-language pathology or anything related (e.g. audiology). Then you are on the right track as you do not have to do any of the required support courses.

If your undergrad is different then you should try to take any of the behavioral science, biological science (biology, anatomy, etc.), physical science (chemistry or physics), and statistics as electives before you graduate or when starting the program/during a break between programs through a community college.

I have yet to start as something happened with my current grad program changing my graduation date so I have to start a little later. I applied for part time programs so that I can continue to work without much emphasis in school. It will take about a year more, but I do not mind it.

>>900895
UPDATE. I talked to my friend who went here for her undergrad and apparently he's even worse with her. He manipulated her into giving her number so he could call for an emergency and ever since then he texts her. He sends "good morning" texts and asks about her marriage while lamenting about his failing marriage apparently. He was fired for sus reasons from his last school and our school only keeps him on a year-by-year basis.
I don't wanna escalate it but I feel like all of his female 'connections' are junk anyways given how creepy he is towards us. I just thought that I would update everyone because when they say that predatory men have multiple victims it's true. My friend tries to give him the benefit of the doubt and says he's lonely, unattractive, and awkward. How about he… GET A THERAPIST? Get a friend! Get on a dating app! Just don't talk to your students and text them inappropriate things ffs.

>>902537
Sorry you're going through this anon. I recommend keeping receipts even if you're not sure you will use them. Ask your friend for some too. You never know when they might be useful in the future. As for what to do now, just refuse to acknowledge any bad behaviour so he can't claim you were happy with it or led him on etc. If he sends you emails with inappropriate stuff, ignore it all except parts that are relevant to your course. Try and hint at his behaviour to others and see if you can gather a group together as it will be harder for higher ups to ignore if multiple people are complaining, should it come to that.

>>902537
Oh, and look up the school's policy for these things and threaten to go public with receipts if you do decide to report it.

What is the extent of mental health struggles while in grad school that farmers have struggled with? I'm so stressed and sleep deprived in my first semester of my MA program that I'm hallucinating and suffering paranoia. Yet my end goal is a PhD. I feel fucking pathetic honestly, how am I supposed to get a PhD if I'm already hallucinating in this first semester? My dad already suggested dropping out because he said that it's clearly too stressful. Idk where to even begin with trying to fix everything.

Defending my masters thesis next week. My college isn’t too far from where my parents live and my mom has been nagging me for weeks about how she wants to come to the defense. I’ve only been to a few defenses but I’ve never seen a parent come, and I tell my mom no but she keeps pleading. Burger grads or grads in general, have you ever seen a parent come to a thesis defense?

>>949664
yeah, constantly. friends and other family members too.

I’m still debating whether I wanna go to law school or not, let alone grad school. It’s been three years since I’ve transferred to university level and I still haven’t completed my bachelor’s yet. I would’ve finished earlier but financial and personal reasons held me back.

>>858047
Good evening ladies I have a question

I know this is the wrong thread but close enough hehe

Can I go to a course at uni uni (undergrad) and transfer to another uni the next year without losing progress on the course? Is this possible?

Thank you for your time

>>950315
I have no experience in this but I'm going to say no, just because the other uni might not offer the course, may do the course completely differently and not accept how your past uni did it, or may just plain not allow you to join in halfway on a course you did some of at a different uni. Credit transfer between universities can also be difficult because there may not be an equivalent/may not be up to the standard of your next uni to allow you to transfer the credit over.

>>950320
Why answer if you're just going to make shit up?
>>950315
Talk with an academic advisor at your target university to see if the credit from university A can be transfered to where you think it should work in your desired degree plan at university B. It depends highly on the class and your degree plan, but even if it's not the exact same course number in some cases they will allow you to substitute the credit. Other cases they will only let you transfer it as an elective, so make sure to be specific when you talk to the advisor, don't just ask if your credits transfer, you should go into the specifics of your degree plan.

>>950363
Thank you for the advice McAnon, very helpful and I will try this. Have a supreme evening.

>>950363
From the way anon worded her post I misread and thought she meant leaving the course halfway through the semester and then picking it up again from wherever she left off at her new uni. I spoke from experience of people around me who transferred unis and had issues transferring credits from their completed courses.

>>950377
Yw nona and good luck!
>>950392
Telling someone to give up on something because it might be difficult and might not turn out the way you want is terrible unbased advice, especially if you have no experience yourself.

I am a lawyer who went to law school in the US. Happy to give advice/explain my experience if anyone cares.

Any creepy male “mentor” stories that grad school farmers want to share? It is insane how so many old men try to shoot their shot with women in their early to mid 20s. Even MARRIED ones. It’s utterly disgusting and I feel like I lose even more faith in men as time goes on (and I already have no faith in them kek).

>>1023441
Anon upthread had one.
Also I hope nonnies never fall for it. These guys know what they're doing and the women they message are never actually special. If he tries it on you, then he's tried it on others. I would never trust a man taking advantage of his employment position to target women.

My mom was a dolt whose first marriage was to one of her profs but she found out real quick and divorced him stat.

>>1023441
It's very common advice for older professional men seeking "arrangements" to present themselves to young women as mentors. It provides power over you so you will be afraid of his opinion, is a good excuse if you're ever seen together, and they get off to the authority (not just sexually, but ego-wise). They are getting old and seeking excitement and proof that they're not irrelevant. Reminder that any attention from a male isn't special, they hand it out like free samples at Costco

I'm so fucking sick of learning new things everyday like it's so tiresome

I’m afraid of being too old if I attend grad school in my late 20s, but I don’t feel ready yet. Do any nonnas with grad degrees regret not going earlier?

>>2069314
I know people that went to grad school in their thirties, forties, and fifties. It’s more common than you think. You’re fine.

>>2069364
Thank you for the reassurance, nonna. Many of my friends went to grad school right after undergrad and already have their masters, so it’s making me anxious

I wanna attend grad school in the future to advance my career and education but the lifestyle change from having a cushy job with a stable income + benefits to a poverty wage that barely cover your expenses and living like that for 4-6 years would be such a whiplash.

>>2069314
I’m 36 and going back for a second master’s. It’s not that weird really. You see people of all ages getting advanced degrees. In my first program I was with multiple 40 and 50 year olds who just wanted a career change or to try something new. Don’t be afraid, nonna.