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No. 601413
>>601408Same! Let's party!
When I read all the insecure posts from younger women here, I feel relief that I'm no longer a clueless 18 yo.
Can't let go of imageboards though, kek
No. 601425
i can't stand the "no one on the internet can be over 25" mentality. i've been here through AOL chat rooms, geocities, napster, livejournal (shoutout efagz), FRIENDSTER, myspace, etc etc i'm not logging off at some magical age.
people who think that life ends at like, 30, are boring and wrong. according to buzzfeed we should all be using walkers and looking into retirement homes. i'm in my early 30s, better looking than i was in my early 20s, have eased up on partying for sure but some of my best and most fulfilling years were post 25.
my only problem is that i feel like i SHOULD want to get married and have kids and it's some weird defensive thing where i assume people around me are also thinking it. but i just have no interest in it and only think about it because of the outside pressure. not sure where i'm even going with this but good thread
No. 601472
>>601425> but i just have no interest in it and only think about it because of the outside pressure.Ugh same. I don't want to get married or have kids, I don't even want to live with a guy. I'm confident and happy with that decision. But I'm still scared of judgement, people don't say anything to me now (at 28) but I know the older I get, the more stigma there will be. I don't care about incel trad rhetoric that my existence should revolve around having kids, they can stay mad, but I'm horrified at the thought of well meaning pity and people thinking my life is sad or pathetic without knowing anything about me. My younger sister just got engaged and I'm worried it will mean a bunch of questions about why I'm not in a relationship or getting married, I don't wanna have to answer 'because men ain't shit and I like being alone' (although that's the truth).
The one good thing is that my parents don't care. My mum has never mentioned it once, and dad told me he actually doesn't want grandkids. He spoils me and I get the impression he knows that the hard work and sacrifice that comes with kids would make me miserable, so it's contrary to his goals of giving me a happy life. I got crazy lucky with them, I know how rare that is.
No. 601499
>>601488>>601482same! i see nothing wrong with it.
i also haven't been financially stable enough for a child until the past year or so- and i'm turning 30 next year. my younger sisters both had children in their early 20's and absolutely cannot afford to take care of them (parents already have custody of one), let alone get control of their dependency to drugs.
i really can't understand why people put themselves in situations like this. kids deserve better than that.
>>601495sorry, deleted my original post
No. 601506
>>601371I love this thread! I knew you guys were here lol. I think back to my early 20’s and I was a depressed mess. I’m surprised I didn’t kill myself tbh.
Glad I didn’t, I’m 28 now, and life is fucking lovely ladies. Despite all the craziness rn, I feel great. Also, I was fat and pimpley at 20. Now guys from my graduating class who treated me like I didn’t exist have popped into my DMs over the years. Feels good to turn them down lol.
No. 601511
>>601487It's hard because people often just straight up don't believe a single/childless woman when she says she's happy. They're convinced it's a lie or a cope or it's only a matter of time before she regrets it with all her heart and soul and will start saying 'where have all the good men gone??' and blah blah (though that last one is mostly an incel thing). It's really hard to prove that you're happy when people think your circumstances are the worst case scenario in life.
The thing that helps me most is reading what actual parents have to say. There is loads of honest parenting discussing these days, often on subreddits like breakingmom for example, or regret stories on childfree. Even the more neutral, balanced subs about general parenting or motherhood are fairly candid. There are plenty of stressed, unhappy mothers out there and almost all of them firmly believe that you should not have a kid unless you 100% enthusiastically want one. It's very reassuring to hear it straight from the horses mouth.
No. 601515
File: 1597096132370.jpg (156.65 KB, 944x642, 156465498789798.jpg)
Sorry for youngfag post, this thread is based and I love you ladies, that's it
No. 601540
>>601522Damn that's shit of your classmates. It took me a long time to graduate school so I was in school later as well. I actually just graduated at the age of 26. Sometimes I can pass for early 20's though depending on who you ask.
So far I haven't had any benefit from getting older yet, especially because of rona. I just want to be independent and content with life.
Sorry for the blogpost sperg. Thanks for creating this thread fellow 26+ anons :')
No. 601547
>>60152226 is internet old, just not irl. Though imo it's not old at all. We're just constantly told we are old and uncool once you 'peak' at 18. Load of bullshittery.
I honestly thought turning 30 would make me feel some kind of way, but it has been great other than the whole quarantine thing. I finally feel settled, physically and emotionally. My childhood and teen years were very turbulent and didn't think I would live to see 20. But here we are a whole 10 years later and I feel great. My depression has lifted, I'm no longer medicated and I am getting back into my art after having my love for drawing and painting kicked out of me by an ex boyfriend.
Maybe they shame us about our age so we arrive at their threshold of undesirability with an already downtrodden outlook, malleable and easier to kick further down the gutter. Or maybe I'm just chatting shite. Anyway, I love you old girls.
No. 601640
>>601621Yep. Especially when you have few normie interests. I don't dislike the people I know at work, I just have nothing in common with them. I enjoy the people I share hobbies with (back in the pre-COVID days with classes and gyms) but I don't necessarily think that would translate into getting along outside of that particular environment.
I know some cool folks online, but it's a bummer not having someone physically present to do simple shit, like walk around the neighborhood, play games and watch movies together. I live with my partner and we do those things (and more, obviously). He's great. But knowing I have no one outside of him to share those activities is kind of weird because all my friends live in different states/countries now.
I was never uncomfortable on my own before this, but over time I've started feeling like I'm in an echo chamber of my own mind. It's surreal and a bit uncomfortable. I know I could put in more effort to make new friends, but that's almost more stressful than dating was to me. I had no issue cutting guys off, lol. But there are so many genuinely sweet women and I'd feel miserable telling them I felt like we weren't clicking after making the time to hang out, or vice versa, like I didn't do enough to be a good friend to them? I know I'm overthinking it but it's a sucky situation.
No. 601672
>>601656It's tough- because your experience and perspective is so different, it's difficult to know what to divulge and what to hold back. The difficulty lies in where you hold back, they will never know that they may hold interests similar to your own. On the other hand; if you give too much, they may be alienated to what you are talking about as they cannot relate.
It truly is a minefield. Though it's peaks and valleys, give a little and you may get a little back. If not, just change the subject lol.
No. 601679
>>601672Thanks anon, you get it. I dislike having to tiptoe around certain topics but at the same time I know that’s just life. You’re right that you can’t chance upon a kindred spirit unless you’re willing to put a bit of yourself out there.
I wish people were more open-minded overall. My best friends in the days of yore were those who I could disagree with and neither of us would get offended, we’d just respect each other’s views and appreciate the new perspective. Unfortunately a lot of people get way more defensive and set in their views as they get older, so it’s harder to feel you can ever be totally relaxed with someone.
No. 601738
File: 1597113022782.jpg (157.33 KB, 1920x1080, Ea-hjPRU8AA_0ez.jpg)
I'm 26 and going through a minor existential crisis about it. I didn't reach the education+career goals I wanted to in my early 20s and I feel like it's too late for me to go anywhere in life, even though I logically know that I'm not even halfway done with my life and my goals aren't even anything that would require 8 years of school or whatever.
No. 601761
File: 1597114635483.jpg (31.91 KB, 550x545, thegoodlife.jpg)
When I was 27 I was horrified of the dreaded 30 mark. Now that I'm here I'm happier than I've ever been and totally content in myself. I obviously have goals and things I want to improve (eating healthier etc) but man I'm less bothered by just about everything. I'm going back to school for a completely different career and the anxiety isn't hitting me like before. I don't plan on having kids and have been married and divorced already in my early twenties so I have nothing holding me back doing whatever I want besides myself. Society can kiss my ass.
No. 601841
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>>601795I was in the military. It's basically a fucking meme to join, get married young to the first thing you see with a pulse, and have a messy ass divorce. I drank that dumb bitch juice.
No. 601861
>>601410I'm 30 and look almost exactly the same as I did when I was 20, just a bit more edge to my face but no wrinkles or sagging or nothing. If anything I definitely look better now, looking back on 20-year olds I feel like they look too young to my tastes. I wonder if my tastes will change as the years go by to always prefer people closer to my own age lol. It's always wild seeing people look at women aged 35 and gasp at awe how "well they aged" like you turn into a fucking mummy after 25.
>>601522Honestly I feel like "the wall" concept was cooked up because after 25 most women start waking up to the real world and not taking male bullshit anymore and men needed a cope. I definitely didn't start getting a sense of self-worth until that point.
No. 601880
>>601425>my only problem is that i feel like i SHOULD want to get married and have kids and it's some weird defensive thing where i assume people around me are also thinking it. but i just have no interest in it and only think about it because of the outside pressure.I'm feeling this, I'm 30 and I definitely experience the societal pressure of having to settle down, get married and bear some kids. I love my life as it is, being single and making a career and enjoying my friends' company and hobbies, but I have the nagging internalized feeling telling me that the clock is ticking and I should "grow up". If it was just the incels and their dead egg memes I wouldn't care but the fact that whenever I open up a magazine I see this bullshit about how being a childless single woman at 38 will mean that all your friends will be having their own little families leaving you alone and your ovaries are shriveled up and dying. I can't help but feel panicked that what if I regret my life choices at 40 like society is telling me that I will even though I'm so happy the way I am right now.
All in all the society loves to completely erase the needs, interests and personalities of women over 25. You can't be a woman at 30+. You'll have to be a wife or a mommy. I can't believe this mindset is still so alive and well in 2020, literally all the content created for women is either fashion and lifestyle for those who are aged under 26 or mommy crap and interior design for older women because they never leave their houses right. I'm hugely into fandomshit, been since my early teens, but I've noticed that when women start nearing their 30's they suddenly hide their age everywhere and stop talking about it altogether while men are free to be the 35-year old bearded "dad bod" nerds openly and stay credible and admirable. Women on the other hand fear the moment someone digs up their real age and flaunts it around laughing at how this old hag is 32 and still hanging around geek bases and/or alternative fashion. It even happens on Lolcow and I always wonder if these 21-year old girls will realize that they're only digging their own grave by taking part in shaming someone for their age because in just a few short years they'll be the ones losing sleep over becoming older.
No. 601930
File: 1597138440870.jpeg (89.1 KB, 500x736, milk_1940_large.jpeg)
Hit up 30 a few month ago.
I thought it wouldn't affect at all but it's all there.
All those advices to not end up a spinster I read up in 'Jeune et Jolie' at 14, all the wall talk on reddit, all the pressure of not wanting kids and my window "closing".
This feeling that as a 30+ normal looking normal looking I just turned fucking invisible. People will rather talk to other men or younger prettier women if we're in a group.
It hurts and LC really help. Having a feminine space (on the internet nonetheless) with likeminded women keeps me sane. Knowing I'm not alone going through this is awesome.
Just wanted to says thanks girls, it would really be a darker place for me without you.
Sorry for not contributing to the convo, I just had to let this all out first.
No. 601940
File: 1597139238384.jpeg (64.55 KB, 620x387, E4D0D49B-B773-4C2E-BC1D-1EAFE0…)
Just popping in to say hi to all the elder farmers in here and I hope you have a great day.
No. 601944
>>601880>It even happens on Lolcow and I always wonder if these 21-year old girls will realize that they're only digging their own grave by taking part in shaming someone for their age because in just a few short years they'll be the ones losing sleep over becoming older.I've always wondered this too.
Like, when you call a 30yo woman an "old hag", are you really so full of hubris that you think you'll look any different when you get older? 30 isn't that far off in the grand scheme of things if you're 21, do you really only plan to live 9 more years and then commit suicide when the only thing you build your value around, your young age, disappears? And you don't think that's pathetic as fuck? Love yourself.
No. 601957
>>601944In your late teens/early 20s you think you're immortal and that it will last forever because you don't have that many responsibilities and the world has many possibilities for a young person. They probably imagine that they'll be automatically married with children at 29 and settle to live a quiet domestic adult life. Too bad it's not the case for many young people these days and the girls who hang around places like Lolcow probably aren't the most normie type living the fast track of following the tradition.
But in all honesty it's the fault of society completely forgetting about the women who passed 30. Like
>>601930 said you'll become invincible in everyone's eyes. Unless you're a mother and find fulfillment in your kids, you're an oddball who should learn her place in the shadows. I think back to Nicole Kidman's speech about how Hollywood throws women in the trash after they pass the treshhold of 28 and it's true. Women are always expected to not live for themselves but for others because of the "nurturing" meme, that's why career women are frowned upon. They're creating a comfortable life for themselves instead of wiping the noses and changing the diapers of their children (or husband for that matter) so they piss people off simply for being self-reliant and looking out for themselves instead of constant sacrificing for the benefit of the people around them.
No. 601958
>>601880Tbf I’m seeing a lot more 30+ aged women in fandom spaces and even encountered a 50 year old fan fic writer in the wilds on twitter. They’re pretty open about their age but I know some of them don’t do it because of teens coming in telling them that fandom shit belongs to them lmao which is stupid because it’s always older people writing and drawing the good stuff. And giving them the content in the first place.
Tbh I expect to see more older people stay in fandom related shit and developing their own communities.
No. 601971
>>601957The more women do this the more normalized it will become, if everyone around you pressures you into something and you see no other way to be, you're a lot more likely to cave to the pressure.
It's really sad because then you get a lot of miserable people with unfulfilled lives who have kids and resent them for it and treat them like shit or try to live out their dreams by turning their kids into some mini-me.
I like to think I can be the encouragement some teenage girl needs to pursue her dreams and do what makes her happy regardless of what society says. If I survived being bullied for 8 years by everyone in my town for being a weeaboo, I can survive people giving me shit for not having kids and a husband.
No. 601973
>>601958It makes sense, a lot of people will keep their old interests as they age. And some might get into it as they get older, like the old granny who streams Skyrim on yt.
How dumb of kids to think that they own a fandom, unless it's something aimed at younger people.
I wonder how old the oldest farmer is?
No. 601975
>>601973I remember some farmer mentioning her being 40+, and I also have a vague memory of someone being like 80 or close to it.
>>601958I think in the future the age range of people visiting sites like lolcow and hanging around fandom spaces will be a lot broader in the future because weeb/nerdy online communities allow you to keep in touch and take part anywhere thanks to the internet and portable smart devices. I know a lot of people who have had kids but still keep the fandom an important part of their lives, even introduce their kids to parts of it like cosplaying together at conventions. And because we have a sizable amount of people remaining childless due to their own choice or factors like being same-sex attracted it's going to become a lot easier to be 30+ and a part of the community.
Honestly my secret dream is that if I ever get children I want to do cute couple cosplays with them lmao. All of my friends who have had kids have done it and they have so much fun because children usually like dressing up.
No. 601988
>>601977I'm 29 and recently single and hate what I know about dating and men. I don't know if it's due to age, the experiences I've had and the curse of hingsight that basically every relationship I've had and couple I've known personally have all had many issues with cheating and emotional cheating. I use to think it was a meme that most men were dicks and liars and all cheaters. I ended up dating an
abusive drug addict and he was dumb enough to not hide anything from me even introducing me to extremely unpleasant people (some involved in gangs, prostitution, drug dealing and even hitmen). A lot of these people had normal jobs and backgrounds. I've became much more aware of brothels (they're literally everywhere) and the people that use them. How cheap sex is and convenient to get. A guy can disappear from a bar and return in under an hour after purchasing sex. I've been privy to conversations about men cheating on their pregnant wives with whores, feeling no remorse. I've been by other men laughing about men they know in their 40s going out on the pull and becoming hostile if their target doesn't put out. Literally was told a man bit some woman because she was trying to get her friend away from him.
I've honestly heard so many other disgusting and dehumanising things. It's made me even reanalyse past relationships and find red flags. Men let their mates cheat all the time. I don't think I believe in monogamy anymore or it would take a lot to make me believe in it again. I even know stories about workplaces where Thai massage business cards were passed around to the men in the company by a manager who bragged about his happy ending at lunch. He's married too of course.
I've even had a mate that's a decorator tell me he use to wank over clients photos on his break. Offered an older client money for head and this was after him forcing his gf at the time to get an abortion. I don't talk to him anymore but he was a super religious type too which just goes to show its literally rampant between the gang bangers to the church goers.
I've been so down about relationships and love lately I even talked myself into seeing this guy I knew wasn't good because I was bored and lonely. Trying to justify if I'm not told he's doing x, y and z then I'm not a fool for dating him. Or other thoughts like, sure thingy cheats on her all the time and they have a family and seem happy, maybe that's why he bought her a car this is just normal. I've even been hit in my latest relationship and justified it because I know of other girls that got hit and stayed in relationships. Like it's absolutely mental. I've always wanted a family and kids but men scare the fuck out of me. I'm 29 and jaded. This was all over the place I apologise
No. 601995
>>601993Porn and casual sex are the issue. In the old days men had work hard and impress a woman before she even considered going on a date. Now a guy can just watch a porno or fuck a random from tinder so they have no reason to work hard for anything anymore and the only reason they ever tried at all was for pussy.
Yeah I’d love to get married and have children before I hit the wall but who the fuck am I supposed to have these children with?lol
No. 602007
>>601995Nah, going hitting prostitutes before coming home as always been a thing. It's not porn doing that to men. It's just that (most) men are disgusting pigs thiking it's absolutely normal to come back to a hot dinner after a bj in an allywey.
I wrote some stories a prostitute friend of mine told me a few thread ago. Colleagues passing up infos about the best whores in town and such.
It's just how men are. They don't see it as disgusting. They don't question it. They just enjoy it. It was a thing way before porn existed.
Sometimes, you hit the jackpot and find yourself someone decent that won't participate in this shit but don't fool your self. Your father, your brother, your co-worker, the nice cute cashier at the 7/11, the handyman repairing your broken door? Some of them have FOR SURE paid some poor girl to use as a living hole.
I know I'll come off as bitter and crazy but just talk to some sex workers and you'll see.
No. 602009
>>601995You're right and referring back to
>>601977, men don't even care about looks as much as convenience. One guy I know has two children with this absolutely gorgeous woman my age yet I've known two absolute dogs he's cheated on her with while she's been at home with the kids.
I don't believe this is only a new thing. I think it's too do with the means men have and if they can get what they want. When my dad was struggling in his career was when my family was at its happiest. When he made it big and had excess wealth he started being more blatant about his cheating. My mum only recently told me a story that while they were dating he hooked up with a coworker and she and him called off sick together. My mum worked in the same company. They broke up but he "won" her back. Then once he made enough so she could be a stay at home mum he just went back to his old ways. My own brother has went down his path and now has a son he doesn't give two shits about. Finding out my own brother that was raised by my mum to be respectful goes to brothels, has casual sex, has affairs with married women, requested a girl get an abortion for him. Where are all the good men lol
No. 602012
>>602007(samefag
>>602009) you're right about sex work. Adding on another sorry about my dad I remember when I was around 13 I was staying at my dad's house. We drove into the city to get my brother and his mate from a gig they would have been 16. My dad drove us with me in the front seat to where the prostitutes "hang out". My dad was laughing with the boys, and calling some of the girls dogs. There were some scantily dressed and others in tracksuits and baseball caps. My dad slowed his car down to taunt one. He did that with me in the car when him and his girlfriend were suppose to be watching us for the weekend. Thst really stuck with me for years. Like I love my dad but I know he's a pig.
No. 602036
>>602028Honestly, almost never. We were fucking like rabbits 10 years ago (I'm talking like 3-4 times a day, every fucking day), but now…. like once a month maybe?
Not trying for a baby so what's even the point when we could both be doing hobbies we'd rather be doing?
We've put on some weight (working on it, but it's not helping rn).
I won't lie, I miss it. But eh, can't have my sexy 23yo body (not pumped full of those kill babies hormones) so I guess it won't get better.
Maybe a new guy would rev' up the engine but I can't do that to my Nigel.
No. 602044
File: 1597151401153.png (73.17 KB, 1801x253, Screenshot.png)
In reference to this post: when I first started posting here a couple years ago I was in my early 20s and always had the impression that the majority of the userbase was actually a bit older than me. Like PULL is for teens and and lolcow is for adults. Nowadays there suddenly seem to be so many farmers below 20 but I don't really believe that the users aged 25+ or 30+ suddenly left, it's just that the younger girls are much more vocal.
Sadly, I personally still haven't come to terms with aging, my life so far wasn't really happy or successful, so I feel quite regretful and as if I missed out on a lot, that I wasted my youth… My interests and tastes are still so childish.
How do you deal with this, anonettes? I only have one mommy friend but I know so many girls my age and much younger who are already married, own a house, live with a guy, are engaged and so on. I just feel like a loser. It's not like I'm jealous, I have no interest in marriage or babies, but I also feel like society judges you for being a single adult woman who only wants to shop, travel, have fun. Plus those things are only really nice when you do them with girlfriends, but suddenly all women around you solely spend time with their men, so it's difficult.
>>601621I didn't manage to make any friends while in university, my old high school friends all moved on and I don't have a bf either, so I don't really know what to do. Join some sport clubs? Dance lessons? Evening school for language learning? Using an app? I kind of would prefer to meet new people organically and not through apps or my job (nothing worse than always having to talk about work).
>>601973 I remembered that there's an anon who claimed to be 45+ 2 years ago
>>>/ot/241842 No. 602068
>>601506I hated my early 20’s too. Worst time in my fucking life and it doesn’t help that most people seem to think it is the best time. It isn’t.
I wasted way too much of my fucking 20’s trying to be kind and “fit in”, because I had been guilt tripped by my dumbass retard family and other old fucks as a quiet teen that I needed to “get out more”, blah blah blah, all that crap that people are uwu spesharu and shit. Of the one or two genuinely worthwhile individuals I have come across these years who don’t seem either crazy, cruel, or just dumber than a knob, I have just gone back to being the quiet easygoing lazy fuck I have always been, just with a tinge of bitterness from all my missed opportunities and unnecessary pain.
I was so fucking stressed out about getting a good job (laughs in coronavirus), getting good grades, being a good person, and it all means shit at the end of the day.
I regret how I essentially put on this big act to be a person I really wasn’t, instead of appreciating who I actually was, just so retards would get off my back about how “quiet” people are never successful, and that reading books isn’t how you get a job! Just lots of really brain numbingly dumb shit you hear a lot in the US when you aren’t this effervescent woke social butterfly. I remember even changing my own beliefs/values to get on with dumbasses instead of just being honest. I didn’t need to try so hard, but I did, and I hardly recognize the person I was between 20-24. She’s like this weird ass ghost in my life who has my face but not my soul, and I feel for her. I wish I could go back in time and tell myself, be you, so I wouldn’t feel so trapped by the vision of myself other people wanted me to be and failing to be that.
No. 602069
>>602022I've never had a libido really because I was put on anti depressants and contraception at the age of 14 and I don't remember feeling that sexual before that age. I'd love to know what it feels like to suddenly get turned on and initiate. My ex and current partner have complained about me not initiating as often as they do, but honestly, I just don't get that urge they seem to get. I love having sex and being sexual with my boyfriend and once I am doing it I enjoy it so much. I get upset and a bit jealous when I hear of other girls getting turned on by things, if I'm honest. I'd love to get that feeling.
This isn't to say I'm not sexually attracted to things. My brain is firing off the signals but my body is so numbed by my implant (no longer on anti-d's!) that I am thinking of taking a break from it for a few months once it runs out this year, just to see if I am actually a sexual person. My anti depressants made it so much worse and I couldn't orgasm for years and was drier than a bucket of sand. Baby steps, I guess. Just feel a bit robbed of my sexuality.
No. 602071
File: 1597154777704.jpeg (12.58 KB, 480x360, B7079538-2540-4C63-B4B1-44582A…)
>>602044As far as feeling inferior, that’s the whole point. Society wants to put you in your place and stay where you “belong” to continue the cycle of men’s comfort.
How to change it? I started to say yes to myself. My comfort first, carrying these hoes and scrotes is heavy and I got diminishing returns for it. Time to focus on yourself and say yes to doing things that make you happy. Try doing it on your own for real and not just telling yourself you will. Nothing changes if you don’t do anything different. Also don’t make excuses. Not you specifically, but I always see girls asking for advice when they’re lonely/different and anons give advice and they never take it! They just talk in a circle about being forever alone in friendship and romance and change nothing because hurr durr what’s the point. Being an old farmer my patience has worn thin for the “woe is me”s who would rather stay unhappy and complain than actually try to create their own happiness. No excuses, just do the thing it won’t kill you hoes.
No. 602083
>>602071I came to your Ted talk bit found it unconvincing.
Of course, they won't take the advice. The goal is to nudge them again and again 'till they get there.
No. 602124
>>602116Yeah… I'm too afraid to get off or change pills, side effects are so scary.
And lately i've been having awful vaginal pain when getting penetrated… So this is just killing my sex life a bit more. I love my bf soo much but I just feel like I'm a burden to him even though he is so considerate about sex, pleasure and pain.
Doesn't help that I have to wait four months to see my gyneco… I hope it's nothing serious, life sucks rn
No. 602128
>>602119I honestly couldn't tell you. I was on the combined pill at 14 and haven't been off hormones since. Switched to the implant at 23 and while I have felt a bit 'better', it still isn't normal. It's fucking weird.
>>602121Shit, really? I was going to get a bilateral salpingectomy which is the removal of the tubes. I had heard of women dealing with pain from clips and things, but not a bi-salp. I am sorry to hear about your hysterectomy though. That sounds so rough. Looks like I have a bit more reading to do.
>>602124I am also scared of getting pregnant. I think I'd have a breakdown or something. That sounds a bit scary, but it could just be something like hormones? I find at certain points in my cycle, it is either very easy or very difficult to have sex. Right before my period is fine, but just after, it's like my vag has been sapped of all it's energy. Shit's whack.
No. 602132
>>602128Ahah, maybe i have no vag energy left lol
We'll see, i'll come back crying in 4 months if i have a tumor or something.
I don't want to ruin the positive energy of you fierce ladies but i really hope covid goes away and life gets better! Haven't had the chance to stabilize in life yet, and covid ruined the little balance I had. Still only in my 20s tho!! I have time!
No. 602150
>>602149>>602140Can they just like freeze a bunch of their sperm and still have the possibility to have their own biological kids in 20 years?
Selfish idiots
No. 602151
>>602140You're doing the right thing, anon.
I wanted to have my tubes tied by the time I was 30, but I've been looking into the possible complications so instead, my Nigel had the snip. We got an appointment really quickly and the procedure was done in minutes, he said it didn't even hurt and he got a whole plate of biscuits from a nurse afterward, lol. I still kind of want my tubes out as a back-up kinda thing, but reading things here about hormone changes and early menopause are making me reconsider.
No. 602157
>>602151Fucking envious of your Nigel.
I think things are over with mine. Asked him if he wanted to marry, said nope, and now that I say it's a deal-breaker for me, suddenly, he's open to it. Oh, like, great! You don't want to symbolise our love, you're just interested in keeping me around (but not enough to even get me a fucking cheap ring - not greedy, anything would do just for symbolic). Like I'm going to be overjoyed you're wanting it now…
No. 602167
>>602140>>602149Why don't you two just go off the pill and take PIV off the table until they nut up? You don't
have to fuck your body up just to let some scrote jizz inside you.
No. 602172
>>602167Yeah, sure, they'll bring some delightfully painful anal. Or get some happy ending at a massage parlor.
wonderful idea.
No. 602178
>>602154Mm, not quite this but I've noticed I'm much pickier about the media I consume. It's gotten tougher to find things that really resonate with me, but honestly I think it's just because I have better taste now. So that's a trade-off I've been happy to make.
Even so, I do kinda miss feeling like every new release within x genre or from y band was going to be the next best thing. I rarely "get hyped" for anything and I'm really lucky to find something that clicks maybe once or twice a year. But at least it's more meaningful now.
No. 602192
>>602177I mean sure. But I do really enjoy some good PIV and wouldn't want to throw it away. Plus frottage, anal and such could still bring about an oopsie with all the leaking.
I don't want ANY risk of getting pregnant. The anxiety of it being possible actually dries me up completely.
No. 602285
>>601807maybe this is an unpopular opinion, but I think it's responsible and admirable when people acknowledge that it might not be the best idea to bring a child into this world. so many people have kids when they have financial problems, relationship issues, not enough time or patience to devote to kids, etc.
even aside from that, it's a bit narcissistic imo to create new life when the world is so unstable, what with climate change looming and everything that comes along with it. you're putting your desire to have miniature versions of yourself above all else–even the wellbeing of your own offspring. reproduction is the most destructive thing a person could do for the ecosystem. one person consumes a ridiculous amount of resources within a lifetime. and for what? what kind of life will the new generation have 20, 40, 60 years from now? there is a very real possibility of intense and widespread suffering. when the pandemic began it was impossible to find toilet paper in stores because of hoarding. what happens when shit really hits the fan? wars over clean water, famines, a virus that kills anyone it infects… the possibilities are endless and very real.
for me, if I ever decide that I have room in my life for children, I will look into adopting or becoming a foster parent. there are so many kids without family who need a supportive and loving home. they don't need to have my genetic material in order to be mine.
wrt to being a "friendless loser"–be kind to yourself. just because you don't have friends right now doesn't mean things will always be that way, and it doesn't make you a loser. this might sound dumb but something that helped my perspective is hearing Chloe Ting say that she doesn't have many friends. I absolutely adore her, I think she's so funny and sweet (and so do millions of other people). having no friends doesn't make her any less likeable. it's just a product of circumstance, not an indicator that something is fundamentally wrong with you.
No. 602330
>>602320the wall is a scrote cope. Women are onto their shit by 30. I wouldn't even dream of putting up with the shit I did in my 20s.
idk when I got to 30 I stopped caring about moids and their opinions as much. I wish scrotes were right and they did leave women over 30 alone, but alas.
No. 602374
>>602307suggesting that someone kill herself for having an opinion you don't agree with? sounds like you're a mom and I hit a nerve. I'm not about to commit suicide or murder people because I'm concerned about the environment lmao
>>602314> the individual has no power over fixing the environment, so we're totally justified in making things worsekek
I don't expect everyone to agree with me, and I support everyone's right to make their own choices. I'm not some eugenics-obsessed freak. I just think it's sad that so many people have kids without thinking of the consequences. judging from my own social media observations, the people having the most kids are the ones who are least educated, least successful, and have the most problems. all this is to say that I think women are justified in questioning the societal pressure to have kids. if you take this assertion personally, maybe that says more about you than it does about me
No. 602396
>>602285I don’t want to have kids because I love my freedom and having money to spend on myself. I do
not envy my friends who are parents. The pictures on insta are cute and all, but I know that’s shit on you’re shirt and you haven’t slept in a week lol. Being a mom is a hard, thankless job.
No. 602402
>>602374Well I'm pro kids and wish I had my own I'm willing to age out waiting for the right circumstances and engaging with the thoughts of adopting or fostering if I only become financial secure enough and stable geographically past fertility, I also agree with your points.
I am sensitive and for whatever reason my childhood trauma has really stuck with me so while people think I'm childish, I do feel like I can still emphasise with children. I have a nephew and his mum is not great. I hate to be judgemental since I'm not a mum but she chooses buying drugs over new shoes for her toddler. She's not even a young mum she's my age and will be 30 next year. I know of a lot of similarly aged women that have kids with less than stable men, some openly take drugs in front of their kids and I've stopped going over to their homes. I cannot tell you how horrible it is to be the parents friends when the kids are seeking attention from their parents that you can tell ignore them, their speech is usually delayed and a lot of them are in nappies up until nursery. I've also noticed the trend of autism being claimed entirely too quickly by some mums as an almost cop out of criticism to their lack of parenting. My nephews mother had claimed my nephew is high functioning autistic but its really obvious he's autistic so he doesn't need an official diagnosis but trust her. There's a lot of selfish people having kids when they can't seem to grasp they now have to consider their kids in everything. You can't keep ditching them on grandparents or family.
No. 602410
>>601679Fuck, I so need a kindred spirit. I miss my exbf so bad sometimes, even though I don't want her back. I just want a connection with another woman so bad. At the moment I only have my boyfriend and that's it. I need to find a kindred spirit but IDK how. I am more retarded than average when it comes to social interaction as I have intense AVPD. I've been in therapy for a few months but have not gotten better yet at all. Most people bore me and I have no idea how to meet another weirdo like myself especially since I don't want online friends, I need someone irl (even if we would see each other twice a month or something).
This feels so hopeless. Fuck.
No. 602420
>>602400I really feel that the perception of 30 being the 'cut off' for a woman having a life and interests and looking cute is because people couldn't fathom a 30 year old woman without kids in the past. Realistically, it's when you have young kids that you don't have the time for dressing up and are too busy for their hobbies. The later/less women have kids, the less people will think we magically turn into frumpy old crones who are too mature for the things we enjoy on the night of our 30th bday.
Though lots of people do think you need to start dressing business casual when you hit 30, /r/femalefashionadvice is rampant with it. Maybe the motherhood age will be replaced by fancy career woman age and we'll always have dumb arbitrary standards about what we can and can't wear.
No. 602443
File: 1597186282563.gif (507.27 KB, 500x281, sffefwaf.gif)
>stop dating men around 28
>force myself to take up hobbies outside the internet
>go through a bunch but find out I love gardening and baking
>git gud at it
>moids always begging for my sweet treats, asking when imma come bake for them
>kek no baked goods for scrotes
>start blocking all the scrotes that make me feel bad or hit on me
>not many friends left but that's ok
>have too many hobbies to be a scrotes therapist anymore
>block scrote as soon as they dump their issues on me
>scrotes chasing me 10x harder now
>they see me being distant as a challenge
>mfw
being 30+ is awesome anons please don't waste your 20s worrying about it.
No. 602529
File: 1597195072290.png (300.02 KB, 608x960, 1589769040237.png)
32 and getting ready to hang up the party towel to try for one and only one child.
My early 20s were cringey. My mid-20s were just sad for various reason (family health issues, no money, no real prospect). I wouldn't say I pulled myself up by bootstraps but I did realize feeling sorry for myself and turning my back on the world didn't get me what I wanted at all (shocking). I think the hardest part is I'm the oldest girl out of all my friends and they're kind of all waiting to see if I get preggo. I do want children, I wouldn't say I'm obsessed with them like some women are, but I honestly can't imagine going into the next 2/3s of life without having 1 kid. I'm nearing the end of ideal time to try. That said, it's not like my single/kidless friends are really ballin hard with cash or exciting experiences.I love hanging out still but my homelife is cozy, and I think a kid would give me something to direct my energy towards. My old hobbies don't really excite me anymore, and just throwing money at plastic shit and travel isn't as satisfying as it once was.
My friends are all slowing down. We definitely aren't doing 48hr hang-outs like we used to. There is a noticeable difference in a 31/32 year old and even a 28/30 year old drinking and partying. Everyone can basically only handle one night, once a week, and everyone wants to be home in their own bed by 10.
This year was supposed to be my one last hooray but it's taught me that waiting is pointless. You never know what's in the future. All the people I idolize or are envious of just keep moving forward. I have fears about becoming a mother, but I am a master procrastinator and if I don't go for it, I'll let it pass me by. Wish me luck.
No. 602531
>>602299I thought he was. He's pretty cool, open-minded and sure af not fucking prostitute (or it's some really sad back alley deal 5€ with a lady with no teeth kek) since I control all finances.
It's a rude awakening, because he was a Nigel in any other way.
No. 602537
28 here giiiirls
>>602536Ugh I’m an only child too and I have 1, single parent, I want some more but I think my uterus is wrecked and I have hormonal issues etc. I definitely wanted a big family but I have barely even been in any relationships in the past 10 years and men are shit what do
But otherwise honestly I’m ready for 30’s
No. 602544
>>602536I'm an only child and tbh it's great. It forces you to make friends and be more outgoing, and you value friendships more because you don't have a sibling to fall back on as a "default friend". Not to mention the horror of being a significantly older sibling and having to babysit a toddler for free whenever your parents feel like it.
I come from a place where only kids are the norm and I've never had issues socializing, on the contrary.
No. 602547
File: 1597196312684.jpg (7.62 KB, 184x274, Z.jpg)
>>602420Kek, Thanks I'll be Diane Lockhart in a power suit at freaking 68yo. That would be awesome. (loving a her representation on TV also. Spinster but not bitter, no kids but preferring her career, still a love life at 60+). Real depth betong being the 'female older lawyer) - her arc on questioning her own sanity was awesome.
I sure look up to that character.
No. 602548
File: 1597196371297.gif (2.01 MB, 211x158, um well.gif)
>>602536Uhhh I have a brother who's trooning out. We don't speak. My boyfriend and his sister have an awkward relationship, so does my ex and his little brother. We're all products of parents who had to juggle two kids, the eldest always being the practice kid and the youngest always being the spoilt or babied one, instead of pooling resources to make a great only child. In my experience, nearly all the lone children I know turn out to be successful– there's always a shittier sibling and you're doomed if both your kids turn out to be shit.
No. 602569
>>602548Kek, I´m the shitty sibling, and my autistic ass was super dependent on my sister, poor girl. I'm trying to make up for it by helping my parents (and her too) now that they are getting older. I think it's better having siblings than being only child, but my sister probably would rather be only child. Only children can be sociable and reliable, and people with siblings can be selfish
toxic assholes.
People should just have how many kids themselves want (and can afford) and not think about stereotypes.
OT, I'm reaching 28, no degree, no long lasting relationship, and I no longer care about enjoying my youth. My childhood and teen years were fucking hell, and so were my early 20's, with every one telling "oh, how I wish I was young and full of energy like you". Good for you mate, but I had to parent my mother since I am kid so no springtime of youth for me.
And honestly, this mentality that life is only worth living before 25 (for both men and women) is so fucking depressing and stupid. I know that when people start to have kids they slow down, but jesus, most people I know seem to have peaked in their 20s and lost everything that made them unique. Hobbies and interests are all forgotten, they complain about having nothing to do or nowhere to go, and just stay home watching tv. Netflix, restaurants and wineries, the same status brands and itens and fashions. The adult world is so much more varied than the teen one, but adults are so much more boring and predictable with their lives. It's like curiosity and adventure died; lets get old and fat and ignorant.
Interesting and independent older people are so fucking rare and precious.
No. 602639
>>602285Omg anon THANK U for getting me. As much as I’d like to have my own children, the world is just too fucked and it would feel wrong. And you’re right, adoption is always a possibility when I’m ready to start my own family.
Most of the time I don’t care that I don’t have friends. But my one friend of 10+ years recently ghosted me and she was the only person besides my partner that I talk to (she moved to a diff state at the beginning of COVID lockdown) and honestly things aren’t great with my partner so I feel super isolated lately and I get real sad. Also, I love Chloe Ting and I do kinda feel better knowing that she doesn’t have friends either lol.
No. 602714
>>602536I have two siblings and barely talk to them at 30, we never had anything in common and didn't do anything together growing up. We all had our own friends. I sometimes wish I actually was the only child because my mom was too occupied with my siblings to ever really give too many shits about me as I'm the youngest. They're both only one step up from strangers to me.
>Pretty much all only children are either entitled as fuck or super weird (think incels if male).What do you base this on anyway? According to studies only children are actually more generous and willing to share because they don't have to grow up sharing every fucking thing they have and being unable to have their own space and own things and not having to compete for attention all the time.
No. 602715
>>602714Samefagging because I can't delete my post but obviously meant
>*and having to compete for attention all the timenot the double negative kek
No. 602767
>>602714I’m an only child and I’m weird, socially awkward and have a huge need of alone time. I’m in the camp of people thinking raising an only child is selfish. Yeah, I know that there’s other types of only children, but about 8 out of 10 of the only children I know (I counted) are social misfits who have an unusually hard time navigating life.
Also, as an only child and only grandchild, while I know that not everyone gets along with their siblings, I resent the fact that there is no one else who can relate to my particular experience with this set of parents and the only one who will be left to grieve when they die.
No. 602771
>>602767You're selfish for expecting a woman to be a broodmare by having as many kids as other people think she should have, as opposed to the amount she herself wants.
I was an only child who grew up with other only children and had a great childhood.
Calling us weird and entitled is insulting, I could give you just as many examples of people with siblings acting like poorly socialized monkeys and having weird mental issues over their parents preferring their younger siblings over them.
No. 602776
>>602771You really get
triggered over a post on lolcow on the basis of being an only child?
Yeah, I think it’s fucking selfish - will that stop anyone from doing it? Nope. I don’t want to control anyone and I don’t, but I’m allowed to have an opinion.
I don’t want people to be brood mares, lmao, what? Having children is optional.
No. 602796
>>602750>In general I find the internet pretty unusable right now… coming from the edgelord 2000s internet, I'm tired of seeing people offended over everything, constantly posting politics or preaching and not having the ability to turn off their brain and have fun for even a bitAs an oldfag I relate. I have developed and internalized the 2000's edgelord sense of humor and I feel like that one racist grandma everyone has when someone berates me for using the word "faggot" casually or something. I don't think the early 2000's internet was vitriolic and the offensive humor was just that, it was dark comedy and not a political opinion. I can't imagine a show like South Park existing today as it did during its former glory, but its old seasons perfectly encapsulate the kind of anti-authority and edgy content most millenials grew up with. Some of us went through a woke panic and are now trying to desperately bury our ~
problematic~ footsteps of pre-2015 but most of us are just tired of the Internet becoming less about escapism and more about polishing a picture perfect image. The tables have truly turned from 2004 when people were making fun of the moral police trying to suck the fun out of everything.
No. 602802
>>602762>The issue is that you were babied, not that you were an only child. This. I know people who grew up as an only child and turned out fine, and people who grew up as an only child and became monstrous mini tyrants. And I also know people who were the golden child of their family of multiple siblings and turned out entitled little fuckers. It has nothing to do with how many siblings you have, it's only about the parents and their ability to raise an empathetic person. Kids learn social skills interacting with other children outside of their homes, siblings are not required.
Most of the fucked up only children that I've met blame their social autism and shortcomings simply on being brought up without siblings and think they've turned out better if they had them, but no, it just that you or your parents fucked up. Having siblings might just as well mean that your home is a constant war zone full of competition and aggression because the kids don't get along and fight over everything, including their parents' attention and monetary resources. Siblings are rarely in the same age group and have years between them so they live completely different lives. They might be different genders which only widens the gap during puberty. It's not always just fun family moments where you learn to share and take care of each other. You don't really have to learn how to nurture and develop relationships to be with your siblings because they'll be there no matter what, that's a skill you have to learn by socializing with the children who don't live under the same roof as you do.
No. 602812
File: 1597234608325.png (1.43 MB, 1177x492, CaptureDDD.PNG)
>>602806Could have gone with Sheng nu. Equally charming.
No. 602816
>>602806Is this a bait? The reference is how Japanese single women after 26 gather together to eat a dinner and cake with friends, not some stupid "4chan culture" meme. The tradition might just as well be a sign of solidarity between women who value their friendship over becoming the perfect housewife after "hitting the wall".
You have to be over 26 to post in this thread to begin with, fuck off with your "4chan internet hate machine jargon!!!" zoomer twitterfag.
No. 602845
>>602836Haumei clearly made the best choice for herself leaving China.
She would never have fit in with her still rural family. She worked her ass off to become a lawyer ffs and they still treated her like dirt.
No. 602850
File: 1597239377564.gif (4.35 MB, 460x353, spitting on you.gif)
>>601371>Right now we are in that weird limbo where society thinks we are too old to have any enjoyment in life but also too young to just die and move out the way>at 26 years oldI'm spitting in your general direction, OP.
No. 602852
File: 1597239840496.jpeg (149.68 KB, 1020x576, F6940F4D-4CB6-49D3-BF91-B952EE…)
I love this thread, except the occasional infighting. It‘s so wholesome and motivating. Thank you, anons.
No. 602855
>>602794Don't think it will, but I got something for you.
https://www.reddit.com/r/breakingmom Make sure to read the man rant and kid rant tags. The amount of women in there with nice, attentive pre-kid men who turned into leeches is eye-opening.
No. 602862
>>602806Kek even if the OP was Christmas cake it would still be redundant to explain or shield the old anons from the scary
problematic semantics of an old 4chan meme, oldfags were forged in the faggotry of /b/
No. 602866
>>602855Thanks! I‘m gonna check it out!
>>602865Which ones did you read? I need that effect too.
No. 602870
File: 1597241049149.jpg (70.34 KB, 640x400, srsbsns.jpg)
Finally! A thread for "grandmas" to chill in.
I'm in my 30s and it's been a challenging life adventure so far. I still feel young at heart and I still love some weeby animu and fandom shite but I find it harder to connect with younger fans in the same fandom. Maybe because I've gotten way more chill with my fandom obsessions and have other things to focus on in life like work and surviving daily life.
The only thing I'm worried about right now is the societal pressure of getting married and popping out 2.5 kids asap. I'm already seen as anomaly since I live in a super conservative Muslim country. Women that are not married with kids at 26+ are viewed as "broken" or have "deep issues" and are best to be avoided and pitied. Who wants to marry turbo misogynistic men that views older women as "problematic" anyways. Gross!
To be honest, I have never had a crush on or show any interest in men ever in my life and marriage was never in the list of my goal in life. I think I would be perfectly happy living a single and uncomplicated life until I die, but society doesn't want to accept the fact that happy single women do exist which is so unfair. Men that are unmarried or have never married are seen as acceptable and even cool or eccentric in some society/culture but not women.
Recently a friend my age announced that she'll be marrying this guy that she met at her workplace in December. She has only known the guy for maybe less than a year? And she mentioned that her dad doesn't really like the guy but she still wants to marry him. I was quite shocked when she told me that she was getting married this soon, since it was only last year that she mentioned to me that she doesn't mind being single because she enjoyed the freedom of traveling alone. I guess social pressure finally got to her since all her siblings are already married with kids and most of our friends are as well.
I'm also worried that I'll be so desperate to not be seen as an "anomaly" in society and just marry the first random guy that shows any interest in me even though I don't feel like being tied down just yet. Plus, my parents are constantly putting the pressure on me by pestering me as to why I'm still single and are trying to hook me up with their friends' single male child.
How do you fend off societal pressures to get married anons? Please share any useful tips so that I won't succumb to it in desperation.
No. 602900
File: 1597244846879.webm (2.85 MB, 640x360, 1586810257244.webm)
>>602536Hi, I'm the original poster of
>>602529 I have to say that I agree with the other posters that the feelings of social isolation and awkwardness, I feel, is more largely dictated by nurture than nature. I have an older brother, but we're not close as adults and although we got on fine as kids, I was still an awkward, over-babied younger child. I actually had more difficulty relating to girls who weren't tomboys because my parents treated us the same and they never pushed me to be more outgoing. I think I see a lot of what
>>602544 was saying, especially when you have 2 of the same gender, and I do have a friend who doesn't want kids specifically because she was the oldest and essentially was a co-parent to the youngest at a young age. I think it's a lot of feeling like if you had "someone else on your side" you'd be better off, but the kind of relationship you have with your sibling depends largely on the kind of personality they have AND how your parents handle your sibling relationship. I love my husband and my brother in law, but their mother is a Narc who absolutely ruined what would've been an otherwise close bond by teaching the younger he was perfect wittle angle and the older needed to just shut up and be better.
>>602865>>602868>>602794r/fencesitting is a good one too. Honestly, a lot changed for me once my husband and I bought a home and had a decent savings. I really wasn't interested in having kids until I had the same kind of stability I was born into. You do you. There's extreme people on both sides of this coin. I personally find it hard to empathize with people who knew their husband is childish and decided not to have 1 but 2 and act appalled that the burden magically defaults to them. A LOT of the "omg kids are so expensive" posts are people who were just clearly unprepared and the dads on their are just sad their Mom-I mean-Wife have a new priority. I love me some drama on the internet, but at the end of the day, most of the people venting/ranting about large decisions don't seem like the kind of person I'd ever take advice from in real life.
Just remember, all of your girlfriends who make bad relationship decisions are also the ones who make bad parenting decisions, it's just way way way harder to escape a screaming toddler than it is your gamer boyfriend.
No. 602936
>>602900I might've read your response wrong, but I kinda disagree. The whole "you picked the wrong partner" shtick is hard to defend when most men are honestly shit in the first place. And even if you "pick a good one"… People can and will change. Get depressed, fall out of love, what have you. You think you got your Nigel but when you're both running on 3 hours of sleep a night and you can't even shit without being in pain, that can all change. I've been lurking on various child/childfree related subreddits and boards for over a year and you see it time and time again - that the moid makes a literal 180. Sleep-deprivation, no sex and baby shit on your clothes will take a toll on you.
I'm probably way too pessimistic about this, but from all the shit I've seen my own parents and friends with children go through… I'm exhausted. It's very disillusioning.
No. 602984
>>602936Yeah, that was my experience too.
I think what made me never want to deal with men was having so many married men and men with girlfriends hit on me at work. They come from all backgrounds poor, middle class, rich even, but they all want a change. They shittalk about their wives or girlfriends or they make terrible excuses like their sex life is not as good as before or she nags a lot for every single thing. So no matter how much time you devote, no matter how much you sacrifice, he's most likely going to get bored at one point. Of course not all men, but what are the chances to find that one in a million loyal guy?
I used to think I was maybe wrong in my assumptions when I was in my early and mid 20s but I'm going to be 30 next month and a lot of my friends are getting divorced and mostly because the guy changed for the worse.
Maybe love is a scam but I get the feeling that most men don't feel love, only lust. Once they stop feeling horny, they'll stop caring about you.
No. 603034
>>602870At this point I think it's projecting. I browse both here and male spaces, and it's men that go nuts the most over not having a gf or sex by some age, and troon or homo out if they don't. They wouldn't be making /r9k/, wizardchan, r/incels/, and so on communities otherwise. I've seen an MSpaint drawing or two outright setting weird benchmarks for themselves like having to get laid by 17 or they're irredeemable loser.
All of the societal pressure about starting a family is entirely revolved around women's sole ability to give birth. If we just had artificial wombs, I think we can just go our own way without being bothered.
I'm not as far along as you are, but good luck. Maybe you can freeze skin cells as a consolation prize, but never follow through with actual children. (lol?)
https://www.iflg.net/ability-to-create-eggs-from-skin-cells-offers-future-new-options-for-infertility-treatment/https://archive.is/nnOHz No. 603062
>>603052>but then turn around and say that women that are virgins at 25+ are weird disgusting spinsters and probably just fat and ugly or somehow mentally ill. lol no. It goes like:
>christmas cake! no good after 25!or
>how can a girl be a virgin at 25+, she just has to spread her legs at a bar and someone will fuck her. (Nevermind anything like real companionship and emotional connection.) No. 603156
File: 1597266549104.jpg (61.92 KB, 564x797, 1595455572169.jpg)
>>602140Men feel like vasectomies are like castration, shooting blanks is literally a nightmare among men. It's like a huge emotional issue, I wouldn't go ahead thinking that he plans to change his mind later, it's just that he will feel defective afterwards.
No. 603172
>>602936>>602984I think the "men are shit" argument isn't fair, because honestly, while most of my girlfriends are good friends to me, the way they talk and treat to their boyfriends isn't stellar and not nearly as one-sided on the blame game as they like to portray. Women get married and then want to get divorced immediately (2 acquaintances of mine did this, cheated on their husband and got divorced within 3 days). They have kids when they aren't happy, and then drag that kid to a new dad that the mom has known or dated for less than a year, in an attempt to band-aid the single mom stigma. Women are capable and display just as much shitty behavior as guys, but women are better at framing everything wrong in the relationship on the man when you ask about it. When they talk about their experience, they almost never pretend like the warning signs weren't there, but women expect men to work harder in the relationship to keep affections. If the things you do to show affection are what you expect back, and you don't receive that, it's time to go. Some of the way my girlfriends talk to guys during fights and break-ups is flat-out terrible: condescending, childish and below the belt. Many of my nerd friends are obsessed with being miserable (the endless "bad day") and expect their man to be their therapist on demand, 24/7. I can't tell you how many fights they pick with their S.O.s because their guy is tired of hearing about their work/family drama for the 4th day in a row. How can you expect someone to be happy to see you and be with you if all your bringing to it is negativity? Now that we're over 30, my single friends are just unbearable with dating. They demand to know the guy's life plan on date #2 and immediately put all their baggage on the table. If you want a romance, you have to be romantic too. Especially the hard-working friends I have, they act entitled to a free-pass at having to be romantic because they've come out of long-term relationships with guys who were just as shitty in year 1 as in year 6.
If that seems to harsh, then maybe we can at least agree that girls are horrible at breaking up with men. Shitty guys don't dump you because why would they put an effort into anything when it's easier to do nothing? Shitty girls don't break up with their guy because they view being single and having "Wasted time" as worse than staying with someone they don't love. Even if they don't want kids/don't have a bio-need to act. It's a bit middle school.
All of my married friends were in long-term, live together relationships. Their husbands are the same dudes they were when I knew them when I was 20, but more mature. They still fight, have bad weeks, but there is never any huge surprise in behavior. Some of what they fight about now, are related to what they used to fight about 2 years ago, it's just they don't say or act out in shitty ways to guilt the other into apologizing. I know many incredible women and their partners are a reflection of who they are. I rarely see a case where the woman is a saint and the guy is a total jack-off. I'm not denying a child is a huge game-changer in a relationship, but so many women marry man-children and then have a mental breakdown when the marriage they ultimatum their guy into isn't lending so hot to their new bundle of screaming, colick-y shit.
Please try to not fall into the same mentality of Incels. If you want to see all men as shit, then they always will be and you'll close the door on the potential to a good relationship forever. The extremes of life are all just a cope.
No. 603222
>>603206This. Girls might dump their boyfriends but at least they have the courtesy to do so, all the men I've known in my life do the most socially retarded things to end or start a relationship.
>Spin around multiple women while telling everyone they're their one and only and sniffing for the first girl to put out, ghost the rest immediately>When the relationship starts going bad, make your escape by flirting with other girls (usually the ones you ghosted before) and when one of them is naive enough for your shit, dump the girlfriend and start dating the other girl immediately after months of passive aggressive behavior and emotional/physical cheating>>603172> I rarely see a case where the woman is a saint and the guy is a total jack-off. I'm not denying a child is a huge game-changer in a relationship, but so many women marry man-children and then have a mental breakdown when the marriage they ultimatum their guy into isn't lending so hot to their new bundle of screaming, colick-y shit.Are you saying that it's a rare occurrence to witness a man being the dick in the relationship and that they're to blame when their worthless piece of shit manchild isn't willing to share the responsibility for his own child? Because that's what this take sounds like. Gonna be honest this whole post just feels like a rant born from a bitter "well at least
I wouldn't nag this poor guy all the time!!!" mindset.
I don't even understand why anons come to this thread with their "w-women can be insufferable too" whining, a lot of us here are over 30 and know that already. I don't fucking care. Plenty of women are "bitchy" and "naggy" because they're unhappy in a relationship they're trying to fix and the man isn't just interested because when the spark goes out he's not going to be there to try to do something about it, he's texting the girl he left on read 2 years ago. And of fucking course your partner should be your emotional support too, you should be able to complain about family and work drama to them. You can do it with friends, of course you should feel safe enough to open up to your partner. It's not like you're suicide baiting or doing emotional manipulation for fucks sake, ranting about something that bothers you is a pretty basic relationship privilege whether you're a man or a woman. It can be annoying to listen to for sure but you should be able to vent so your partner knows you're not doing well and, I don't know, could maybe help you out and support you.
>Please try to not fall into the same mentality of Incels. If you want to see all men as shit, then they always will be and you'll close the door on the potential to a good relationship forever. The extremes of life are all just a cope.These women are talking about how men mistreat them and don't see them as equals. Incels complain about not being entitled to sex. It's fucking shocking how many times I hear men constantly talking shit about their wives and letting the relationship go to hell because they simply don't want to do anything to improve things.
No. 603250
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I feel pretty good about my career but that’s about it. Honestly the worst thing about being 30 is how fucking lonely I am. Not having a boyfriend is fine but I seem to have ended up surrounded by well adjusted happy couples, which just highlights my own solitude.
I can’t seem to make any new friends either; most women my age have families or are couples up, I don’t attend school or college anymore and I’ve just moved so I can’t even rely on old friends and siblings.
Sorry for all the gloom, I’m feeling super isolated right now. Here’s a photo of my ultimate age-inspiration.
No. 603251
File: 1597276025272.jpeg (32.4 KB, 333x500, E60BB089-F51C-4A75-B488-EF0F90…)
>>603244I feel you, I’m adopted and my mom is 80, with heart and bone issues. Once she goes my family will consist of exactly one brother and one sister.
No. 603255
>>603250I hate the lonliness too. I took myself off social media because it was lonely seeing everyone living life having fun when I was being depressed lol. Now that I've got over that I've been thinking of making an Instagram to document my solitude activities to see if anyone takes an interest to do them with me. Even new people. Wondering if tagging locations and places will find mutual or something. I had a very
toxic mindset growing up so I didn't retain friendships from those times so I'm started from square one. It sucks that it's easier to get a boyfriend ime than a platonic friend at this age.
No. 603258
being in your mid twenties/late twenties is such a mindfuck. I still look young and FEEL young, but society is telling me I'm supposed to have already graduated college, have an established career, get married, get pregnant, buy a home… I'm nowhere close to any of those things and I feel fine about it. I live in a small apartment (which I enjoy, why would I live in a huge home when I'm only one person?), I'm not concerned with making a lot of money, failed college a couple times so I'm just barely working on my first degree, not even considering children right now. I'm trying to work on shedding the shame of not reaching certain socially accepted + expected age milestones. I am content with my life and I don't need to do all this unnecessary shit just to be performative for other people. why can't I be alone in my small apartment, happy with my cat in peace? and yet I can't stop comparing myself to others my age and feeling like shit
No. 603360
>>603258I found a video on TikTok of two older women gossiping with each other and it's such such a breath of fresh air. They were so animated, it was a good reminder "growing up" is just a mask we put on to
seem proper and mature.
I'll gladly be playing video games and collecting stuffed animals until it genuinely bores me.
No. 603435
>>602843>>602841These guys are so desperate for pussy they fuck dolls and masturbate to cartoons but a woman over 30 is unimaginable? I couldn't live with myself if I was so broken.
>>603332>>603368Be positive, anons! Accepting that life isn't a competition and that I'm not going to get a report card at the end of all of this helped me a lot, then I learned to accept more of the things I disliked about myself, then I started taking more risks, and now my life is fuller than it was! I think the fear of failure holds back a lot of people, but especially perfectionist women.
No. 603525
File: 1597325202041.jpg (25.76 KB, 500x375, external-content.duckduckgo.co…)
Any of you gals know of verified discord for 30+ woman to talk hobbies,book club, gossiping, feminism and women issues?
There has to be one around, right?
No. 603665
>>601371I have some pretty raw feelings about growing older as someone who was raised by older parents and always had older friends. I don't feel my age (28), and my boyfriend who is one year younger than me is always talking about what 'normal' people do at our age…like saying that I dress too 'young' or that my interests are too immature. But I just don't feel like I should have to change because of my age! I remind him that it's not like we have any pressure on us to 'grow up' the way he thinks growing up should look. We don't have kids, I'm not an aunt because my sister who is older than me doesn't have kids either, and at least I have a career that I'm very professional at. Just in my time off I draw and watch TV, which I don't think is an immature pastime. Between him and my coworkers asking when me and him are gonna tie the knot or have a baby, I hate it. I was also in a discord where the mods and members were pseudo trad and constantly riding my ass about 'settling down' and having a kid, but I have never wanted kids. I'll be honest, I don't think my boyfriend really wants any of that either, but he is very performative so I think the 'wanting kids' thing is just a performance for him. He's even admitted he's very reptilian in regards to children.
Does anyone else have issues like this with their partner? I can't be alone in this.
He's also about to leave for several years and we're gonna have to be LDR, so yet again why would I have kids?
With age I have had to open my mind a lot, and it has shaken my self identity. I wish I had become more concrete like some of you ladies, but that just wasn't how my life turned out. I had to make a lot of choices that my late teens/early twenties self would've balked at. Going into a conservative field, dying my hair normal colors, getting more excited for my Betabrand office pants to come in than concerts, throwing out my battle vest…I miss it sometimes, the boho punk lifestyle, but then I remember going through the summer with no AC and biking everywhere and I think, no, I am happier now that I have some stability, even if I had to trade in my manic panic for madison reed.
No. 603724
>>603665Why are you dating a man like that?
An issue with women is we let the men we are with strip us of our hobbies and interests. Even before I was 28 my bfs would tell me my hobbies are dumb, vapid etc
Now I have no hobbies lol I say you better drop him before you end up like me.
No. 603770
File: 1597345595073.jpg (51.63 KB, 1024x601, 1596883276474.jpg)
Anyone else feels no desire to progress? I don't want to change or leave my job. I don't want a promotion. I'm just happy with doing simple tasks in familiar environment with the same people. I love working from 9 to 5 at the exact same desk. Most of my close friends are older, unmarried girls (like 50+yo, I'm 27). I have a fiance but I don't really like him much. He is a sweet guy, but I don't want to marry him or live with him. The idea of having kids seems outlandish to me. I can play otome games for hours on end but actually meeting up with my bf once a week seems like a chore to me. Idk. I feel like an alien for being the way I am. Nothing brings me more joy than spending the day alone, going on fun trips by myself, etc.
No. 603787
>>603770I love my alone time, I have an old neighbor who will constantly ask me whether I get lonely (I live alone and work from home) and it annoys the fuck out of me that I've told this man no a hundred different times lol. I've always been like this to an extent but with age it's really kicking in more. Love the peace and quiet.
You owe it to your partner to tell him how you feel. It's his time that is being wasted here in an engagement that won't lead anywhere. Rip off that band aid and let him move on and make future plans that are based in reality, eating up his time like that isn't right. Especially if he has it in his head that there's a marriage in your future.
No. 603792
>>603770I feel you on everything here except:
>I can play otome games for hours on end but actually meeting up with my bf once a week seems like a chore to me.You might consider cutting him loose. Unless of course he is fine that you see no future together, and he never wants to co-habitate either.
>>603779Yes. The only time I ever felt good being social was when I was drinking. I've been sober 4 years and it's pretty much the only thing I miss about drinking. It made is so easy to freely chat and not get overly neurotic about it.
No. 603847
>>603770I completely relate to this except I quit my job (it was draining me mentally) I really have no desire to climb up the corporate ladder but i just want salary increases
I hope you dump your fiance if he's just being a chore to you though alone time is great but sometimes you just need someone to be with
No. 603904
>>603724Honestly, I began dating him because we had and do still have a lot in common. He's changed a lot while with me but you're right, I've never criticized his hobbies and I don't understand why he criticizes mine. He has no friends and his family are more like me than him, so I don't really understand why he has this idea that I'm supposed to be this boring plain older woman. He wasn't like this when we were 24/23.
>>603733You're not wrong, and I appreciate your realism.
No. 604118
File: 1597375439158.jpg (43.04 KB, 540x361, 1561226881307.jpg)
>>603732>I rarely get people implying I'm oldI mean… unless it's your direct family nobody will tell you this because it's rude and they never really know, maybe you're one of those people who have looked 40 since they were 20, maybe you look super young. And with your family it's a gamble, my parents don't tell me this either.
What I've noticed is that in my early 20s people were treating me like the ugly weeb that I was and I just attributed it to that, but now that I'm no longer ugly or a weeb at 27 people just seem kinda bitchy in general and I don't know if it's because I'm officially "old". My neighbors don't say hi to me and just pass me by or look at me, store clerks (mostly female but some male) are never friendly and always sound bored when talking to me. Even my bf noticed it because with him it's the opposite, people love him and everyone smiles and is friendly with him, my own neighbors greet him when they see him. I don't even know if it's age related because I've seen the same clerks that act annoyed around me act super bubbly and nice to customers who were middle-aged women before me in line.
I don't know what's going on.
No. 604181
>>602285>maybe this is an unpopular opinion, but I think it's responsible and admirable when people acknowledge that it might not be the best idea to bring a child into this world. so many people have kids when they have financial problems, relationship issues, not enough time or patience to devote to kids, etc. Well people who are stupid enough not to care or consider those things do it all the time. One of my friends is like that, her 10 year old daughters teeth are rotten. She can't be bothered telling them to brush their teeth.
She'll probably end up being dead at 20 being the g/f of some drugdealer.
No. 604228
>>604128Living in your 20's is actual hell and I hate how youth is being glorified and people end up lamenting over their "lost time" when in reality they were probably more miserable at 21 than 31.
>Being broke all the time, no disposable income>Still dependent on your parents to a degree>Struggling through university and working shit jobs to pay for it>Catty, overblown drama between friends because everyone is still in the teenager mindset>People don't take you seriously, granted it's because you're still a dumb fucking teenager with a black and white world view>Bonus: creepy older man perving on you all the time>Working exploitative junior positions to desperately kickstart your career>Still extremely self-conscious and paying too much mind to what your peers, especially men, think>In case you got married, you'll probably end up divorcing when both of you hit 30 because you grew apart. The same goes for that long term relationship you started in your late teens/early 20's, it's most likely going to end>A small shitty apartment/dorm room because that's all you can affordEvery time I slip into that "I wish I could be 20 again" I instantly remember all the shit I had to put up with back then and I'm happy to be in my 30's again. I'm so much more stable and mature now and I wouldn't change it for anything.
No. 604231
>>603665>my boyfriend who is one year younger than me is always talking about what 'normal' people do at our age…like saying that I dress too 'young' or that my interests are too immature. >I was also in a discord where the mods and members were pseudo trad and constantly riding my ass about 'settling down' and having a kid>I'll be honest, I don't think my boyfriend really wants any of that either, but he is very performative so I think the 'wanting kids' thing is just a performance for him. He's even admitted he's very reptilian in regards to children. Yikes. Dump the fucker and definitely don't have kids with him. Don't waste your time on
several years of LDR with someone like this, jesus christ.
>>603724>>603731This. So many men are legitimately embarrassed for their girlfriends' "dumb hobbies" because their friends are teasing them for it. I just saw that viral tweet making rounds of this guy complaining about his girlfriend's interest in pokemon and how his friends make fun of him for it all the time despite them enjoying Minecraft themselves and he was asking for advice on how to make his girlfriend stop. Thankfully everyone told him off and the story had a happy ending because the guy realized it was a problem with his friends, not his girlfriend, and he started getting into pokemon himself to connect better with her. But it really opened my eyes to this issue that I sort of knew was there but couldn't quite put my finger on it. It's happened with
so many of my girlfriends, their boyfriends suck the life out of them and shame them for their hobbies making them give up everything that makes them happy. I don't know why that is. I know some women do it to men too like forcing them to sell their game collection or board game stuff which is just as equally heart breaking but generally women seem to be much more tolerating and respectful of the man's hobbies than men are of their girlfriends'.
No. 604345
>>604118Maybe you just have a resting bitch face or have a "bad bitch" aura anon? Don't worry anon, I'm also in the same boat. I've always had a resting bitch face since I was a kid. Only knew I had a serious case of "RBF" when a few of my close friends confessed that they were too scared to talk to me when they first met me because I look angry/serious/bitchy/snobbish all the time. Ngl, having rbf makes it hard to make friends because people automatically think I'm snobbish or bitchy person, but in reality I'm a pretty laid back person who rarely gets angry.
I've been ignored by strangers and store clerks all my life and to be honest I kinda like it since I'm a super introverted person and hate being social. Also, I seldom get pestered/catcalled by random horny/gross guys compared to my other more "bubbly" "smiley" friends which makes having rbf or "bad bitch" aura not so bad after all.
No. 604351
>>604345
> I've always had a resting bitch face since I was a kid. Only knew I had a serious case of "RBF" when a few of my close friends confessed that they were too scared to talk to me when they first met me because I look angry/serious/bitchy/snobbish all the time. Ngl, having rbf makes it hard to make friends because people automatically think I'm snobbish or bitchy person, but in reality I'm a pretty laid back person who rarely gets angry. Damn anon, exactly the same here except friends have also reported being “scared” of me when we first met because I’m 6ft tall (and have been since I was like 12) and I was pretty serious with sports growing up so used to weight train. Boys at school nicknamed me “The Tank” lmaooooo.
I also agree on RBF being useful now I’m older because I’m also pretty introverted and it suits me fine if folks are put off from interacting with me.
No. 604363
>>604231>> So many men are legitimately embarrassed for their girlfriends' "dumb hobbies" because their friends are teasing them for it. I just saw that viral tweet making rounds of this guy complaining about his girlfriend's interest in pokemon and how his friends make fun of him for it all the time despite them enjoying Minecraft themselves and he was asking for advice on how to make his girlfriend stopThis is a weird vibe I've been getting more recently in regards to the "x wife guy" memes. Like "mareep wife guy" or, apparently, "furby wife guy"? In both cases, even though they're referring to the husband, they're mocking the wife's "weird hobby" and reducing her and her relationship to that.
I don't have a partner who cares about this, but I've definitely started to sense the "women over 25 are creepy" feeling from fandom and cosplay circles. It's all the same, that women are expected to age out of things.
No. 604385
>>604351"The Tank"? That's actually a cool nickname anon. Would definitely love to be friends with someone with the nickname "The Tank". Yea, tall girls have it way harder at school.
Right? RBF is definitely a useful thing to have if you're an introverted person.
>>604363 Agreed anon! I also noticed that people are trying their hardest to chase out women over 25 from being involved in fandoms/cosplays/nerdy hobbies; especially in social media. I hate how society forces women over 25 to automatically turn into a boring, normie, nagging moms/wives/gfs persona. Even worse, they expect older women to only play the supportive wife/mum/gf background, no fun allowed role. The world hates older women so much.
No. 604396
>>604345>>604351I'm exactly the same. I'm also very tall and I was called creepy and nicknamed death because I'm thin and always dress in black, while being pale and having long black hair.
After people would talk to me for a few minutes I was surprised how they always said something among the lines of you're actually a cool/nice person. I can't imagine what sort of image they had of me prior to that. But I'm introverted so just like you, I'm okay with being unapproachable.
No. 604427
I hear you
>>604371 and
>>604400I’m early 30s, dropped into the job market after college right in the middle of the 2008-2011 financial crash/recession and my early twenties were spent dealing with the crushing realisation that graduating top of your class at one of the best colleges in the world means absolutely fuck all to employers. Now a decade later I’ve just managed to get my career on track and after taking a year out of dating and sex of any kind I was gonna drop back into it in 2020 but then covid happened. My condolences, I really understand that kind of “life on pause” feeling now.
No. 604521
File: 1597428509210.jpg (349.46 KB, 1200x801, MMK_TINYHOME_4129.jpg)
Habitual discorders, please, I pray you to make it happen.
Bless us with a lovely nook for us 30+ lurkers to congregate on the daily.
No. 604777
>>604363>>604385The age discrimination especially in cosplay is nuts these days. The whole hobby is filled with 18-23 year old girls who consistently shit on women over 25 calling them washed up and weirdos for cosplaying at "such an old age" and their simps keep enabling this mindset. They're the ones who will probably stop only because they became so self aware and terrified of being the target of the same treatment they gave out to the older women, not because they "grew out of it". That's what a lot of women sadly end up doing, they give up things that are fun and make up their personality because they're so afraid of being judged. Back when I was in my late teens the rare 30+ cosplayers just seemed really cool and inspirational and they were usually much more talented than the younger ones due to the experience they had gained over the years.
In my opinion it all boils down to women being expected to dedicate themselves to "settling down" i.e. starting a family, those who won't are branded as self-obsessed dead egg cat lady spinsters who ignored their responsibility of being a mother and a homekeeper. The ones who didn't can
maybe pick up a hobby when their children are adults and they finished their womanly duties.
also suspecting this is why so many nerdy women have been trooning out when they're nearing their 30's No. 606296
>>606291>is it too late for me? Absolutely not. I'm 29 so I was also always under pressure to have my life together by now even when realistically my friends who stayed with their parents longer are doing better now because they were able to save up first instead of getting straight into debt. The people that moved out too early are in the worst situations.
But also if you're going to compare yourself to others it's important to consider how things are about to change for young people, our parents may have had houses and kids by our age but the next generations of young adults after us are going to be completely fucked. Don't let anyone shame you for moving out at 27 because the next wave of adults might be living with their parents forever.
No. 606314
>>606311I feel like there's a difference between having a hobby and being significantly involved in the "community".
Let's be real: we all came here from cgl, but there's a reason I don't lurk there anymore. And a reason I hardly use IG anymore. But that doesn't stop me from making things I like either. If it doesn't interfere with the rest of my life, why does it matter? That's half the point of this thread.
(I've thought that maybe in 20 years, I'll be one of the historical reenactment ladies anyway. But, you know, that doesn't mean I
have to be.)
No. 606315
>>606292Ahh yes, hobbies. Such as cosplay, for example? I don't do it myself but combining sewing/craft skills with fandoms you enjoy and going to cons to socialize seems like a pretty good, fulfilling hobby.
Anyway you must be a teenager, come back when you realize you won't just lose interest in fun things when you hit fucking 25 of all ages lmao.
No. 606351
>>606292>mfw this old as hell bait gets posted and people bite But seeing how this is still a pretty popular serious discourse in cosplay it's so tiring, I could barely even fucking afford making costumes and visiting conventions at college age. Now at 30+ I've gained a decade worth of costume making skills, can get a nice hotel room for myself and don't have to pinch pennies when getting materials for my projects. Scavenging for scrap fabric and calculating tight budgets for costumes while rooming with 5 other people to save money was absolutely miserable.
>>606315Cosplay as costume making is such an underrated hobby to begin with. It requires an extremely wide skillset to produce a good, faithful interpretation of the costume because there's all sorts of factors at play like sewing, prop making, makeup, artistic competence and charisma to some degree. Social skills are also required to interact with other hobbyists and improve by exchanging information and mingling. I know there are an assload of zoomers now just ordering a $30 costume from Aliexpress and putting it on for a TikTok video but that's like saying miniature model building is just kids playing with building blocks.
No. 606859
>>606386Create a Patreon or OF then siphon money off the rubes still in careers by guilting them.
It's what I see every other lazy ass doing.
No. 606912
>>606889Did you have any kind of crazy phase? Where I live we don't really have a culture around college and partying but I went through a phase of sleeping around and going to a bdsm nightclub for a while. I consider that my crazy 'wtf was I thinking' phase. That's the time I look back at and think "god I would never do that now" lol. But in a way I think it was good to get it out of my system. Having a wild time to look back on is weirdly comforting once life starts getting monotonous. Though I know lots who had kids early and skipped all that completely.
If it's just the drinking phase you missed out on you can always do that now
No. 606929
>>606902Are you retarded? This is a terrible time to party, plus I have no one to party with
>>606912>Having a wild time to look back on is weirdly comforting once life starts getting monotonousNo I never had that phase and that's why I'm asking the question. Are you suggesting I drink by myself?
>>606913No one asked for your opinion
No. 607005
>>604777>They're the ones who will probably stopThey won't, they'll just feel terrible about it and pretend they're in on the joke and they're not being laughed at when their time comes, just like sh0e.
I don't mean this in a bad way, but women tend to be very stupid when it comes to local maxima, it's mind boggling. There's always a lot of getting a little advantage here at the expense of future self esteem, instead of quitting this hell game they're never going to win (because it's
designed to keep anyone from ever winning) they tend to go "well, I'm not losing as badly as the others". Hell, it's often at the expense of their
current self esteem, calling perfectly normal looking women "ugly", not realizing that this just makes them more insecure.
It makes me sad. I was terrified of growing old at fucking 15, at 19 I was mourning my lost youth and feeling like I had to apologize for no longer being a teenager. There's no winning. Just don't play.
No. 607495
File: 1597748047157.png (773.29 KB, 600x599, 4bb600098f1b_0f3a73ee_640.png)
>tfw bf's great aunt still gets dick pics and messages from men>she's like 65kek seems like men don't change so don't worry about ageing too much farmers
>>606537Everything incels say is a cope imo
They're bitter bitches because they know they're gonna die alone and want to drag everyone down with them.
If they don't want to improve their piss poor selfish attitudes it's their own fault tbh.
No. 608407
>>606889I wish I could go back and not party so much in uni, so take solace in the fact that the grass isn't always greener on the other side. I feel like I wasted my 20s on alcohol and drugs and impressing losers.
>>607495Yeah my mum has always been hit on my whole life (she's very beautiful and of course I favour my dad's side aha) so I never really bought into the "men won't touch you if you're not a 20 year old 10/10" meme
No. 608552
So I've hit 30 this year and decided I just can't drink alcohol anymore. The last time I did I just didn't get any enjoyment out of it and felt pretty bad afterwards so just haven't had anything since. But it has been weirdly liberating in a way? I've been out a few times since and it has felt good not to come back feeling like shit or doing something embarrassing, etc.
From like 17-25 I pretty much spent all my free time in a pub. When I stopped going as often the friends I had all them years just stopped contacting me too. They didn't seem interested in doing stuff outside a pub. Not even like going to a cinema or anything. I think a lot of people have this same kind of experience to, some people are only your friends in the setting of alcohol. I actually regret a lot of it now cos I feel like I've missed out on time I could have spent doing other things? I spend a lot of my weekends now going out into the countryside or travelling to nearby towns or going out to nice places for food, etc. When before it was "okay I'm going to the bar later, let's not do anything until 5pm cos I don't have time anyway"
>>606385>>606397I was a "high achiever" at my last job before this one and it burnt me hard. You get praise for being the best but then the bar is then set so high that even if others around you are still much worse than you, any slip up gets you punished way harder than those other people. The job I have now I am the bottom of the barrel but I'm much happier, actually somehow earn more and I don't have the responsibilities that cause stress or burnout. I can turn up, do my bit, then fuck off home and not have to think about work til the next day. No-one expects me to make big decisions or whatnot and I'm okay with that. Power isn't always a good thing.
No. 614453
>>606537Some ethnicities legit look better the older they are. There's exceptions like everywhere else, but I can't imagine girls in my country being "hot jailbait teens" because we tend to have stronger features like bumpy noses that look awkward as hell on teenagers, which paradoxically makes some people look older than they do at 25.
A very famous singer from my country used to look like a trashy mom when she was 18, now she wrecked her face with plastic surgery but she looked great until she was at least 45.
No. 614550
>>614540I'm hoping I'll have a more sizeable nest egg at 35 or 40, yeah.
Maybe I'll be worse off on the dating end, but at least I won't have too be fucking poor again (because due to health issues, leaving right now would basically eat all of my savings and force me to move back at my parents).
I don't mind the idea of being a 40yo farmer, giving very bitter advices and horrible anecdotes to our wide eyed still hopeful 23yo younglings, kek.
No. 614572
>>614561Kek, you made the cut off this crazy shrink made up!
Seriously, maybe she was trying to say that people that don't fall in love young just have higher standard/threshold for what they consider love.
Don't fret young anons, you'll get your butterflies and sunshine (before it all goes to shit)
No. 616646
File: 1598532362025.gif (980.13 KB, 340x242, T1TPQ3v.gif)
>>601371It feels really weird to me that I already perceive teenagers as different species (I'm 26). Just can't connect with them. Their fashion and favorite music is shit to me. My bf is a professor at university and it buffles me how ill-mannered the majority of students is. I've also had a misfortune of tutoring one highschooler and I still shudder recalling this little fucker. He wasn't rude on purpose, it seems that he somehow didn't know how to behave himself, what was appropriate in a context of our relationship and what wasn't. I hate teens lol
No. 616701
>>614544My first relationship longer than a fortnight was from age 21 and lasted about two years and it was definitely whatever love is. I've never felt it since then unfortunately, only met people through online dating and never quite managed to get the stars to align with both being interested in each other and both open to a relationship all at the same time so that something could grow.
I'm 28 now. Happy with my career and hobbies but really not sure how to meet people properly, it seems like apps are so easy that a lot of decent people who would be trying to matchmake through friends and so on just use Tinder instead - but then the general awfulness of the dating 'culture' on Tinder set by the majority poisons every interaction on it at least a little.
No. 616728
>>616724Like I said I don't want kids, it's just the thought that it confirms my maturity that freaks me out.
I mean I look weirdly young, I feel young and yet I'm a couple years away from being in a whole new risk category If I got pregnant. Tbh I went through something similar when I got a mortgage 'like woah I'm THAT grown up now?' I don't feel my age til something really reminds me
No. 616916
>>616899> girls partied and fucked in their 20s and cant get a man in their 30s becuz they rejected all the nice boys. It's just them describing themselves in the pursuit of Stacy and hoping the worst for her after she rejected him.
Notice how Meg, Becky, or femcel is entirely nonexistent outside of mentions like "lol just spread ur legs at a bar and u can get laid" with zero thought on relationships.
No. 616964
>>616899Be careful, cause now the fat and desperate scrotes are looking for the low self-esteem women they bullied back then who have their shit together now. Instead of using women for their bodies (cause they know they can't size up to pump n dump anymore), they want to use women who have the money, the transportation, the homes, and the ambition so they can attach to them like a parasite and flop.
They know women often want commitment and kids so they will dangle that carrot in order to get women to take them in, but don't buy it.
Now more than ever you have to be vigilant because there's more shit to lose.
No. 617489
>>617062That's a ludicrous reason for him to not want a vasectomy and it's good that he realised it, especially as a vasectomy is so so much less medically intrusive than a hysterectomy. With that said, take care that he doesn't feel like you used your planning-to-get-sterilised actions to indirectly blackmail him into getting a vasectomy himself to stop you from doing something so invasive and irreversible - do make sure you talk to him and make sure he's happy with his choice and does accept it is
his choice (with, obviously, some input from your desires too)
Anyway, congrats, glad to hear it worked out for you two.
No. 617527
>>606537You're right.
35 is the new 30. Women are healthier, get out of school later, have children later.
No. 617656
>>617630Fuck a random dude that looks like he has good genes (ask for a history of mental illness in the family on the date before you fuck him) and have your kid by yourself.
You don't need the dude around,
nonnie.
No. 617666
>>617630I know it's easier said than done and you might only want biological kids, but you could always consider adopting.
I've become more open to the idea of kids over the years but the idea of being with a man and knocked up by one really turns me off so I kind of feel you there.
>>617656This is shit advice.
No. 617676
>>617656Normally I would ignore low grade bait like this but it just depresses me that they can't even leave the 26+ thread alone
>>617666I think people consider adoption as some easy solution because there are so many kids in need of a good home but the truth is that adoption is a pretty complex procedure and it can take anywhere from 5 to 10 years to actually get a child because the screening process is extremely long and strictly regulated. Which is obviously good because you don't want pedophiles adopting kids left and right just to abuse them, that's why a lot of countries don't allow single parents to adopt. Not everyone is suitable to adopt either, the children can come with severe attachment and behavioral problems due to the abandonment they've experienced which is also why the screening progress takes so much time. This is obviously not always the case and regardless the kids deserve a good home that allows them to thrive but adoption is way more complicated than people think imo. I was actually considering it because blood relation isn't that important to me but the more I looked into it the less suitable option it became. Maybe I'll just get a wife and IVF so I don't have to bring up the kid on my own.
No. 617693
>>617676Wasn't bait and it was honestly way more of an actual option than adoption.
IVF cost A FUCKING LOT. I hope your wife is rich.
No. 617724
File: 1598634509308.png (332.83 KB, 390x607, 19F0FAC8-ED6A-4676-B789-66926D…)
>>617720I feel this. Let’s throw a party anon
No. 618026
File: 1598646100479.jpeg (11.54 KB, 300x168, images (1).jpeg)
>>618024
Yo kid we're not ur enemy, don't go fucking blame us for judgmental moids??? What the fuck. Look I'm just a 30yr old autistic cunt whose had to deal with mental issues of my life. Heck we're on lolcow, i bet you most of the oldfags that are still on here here have had to deal with shit too. Christ. I'm drunk. Sorry. But don't shit on your fellow females ok
Also I wish I fucking partied but mostly I just masturbated and cried in my twenties
No. 618042
File: 1598647635274.jpg (253.31 KB, 1440x538, 20200828_162923.jpg)
I thought I was the only one who felt this. I'm no spring chicken myself but god damn. The men mu age are starting to look 60 and I'm only 28.
No. 618065
>>618057Ally bank.
It's not hard: when you get paid, take money out and put it aside to a place where it'll be a hassle to get the money out
No. 618340
>>617938Because different people have different interests? Good for you for being different than other girls
>>618050How do you have so much saved up if you've been fucking around in college?
No. 618710
>>618690True anon, true
And i know it all but i started feeling old and rly craw that „family”? Well no kids but i hope u know what imma talking about. Just a old girl feeling old
No. 622495
Anon-chans, is it even worth comforting, supporting a woman who is 26yo but is a trad+rightwing-addict that panders and hangs out only around men all the time for the sake of validation? Thing is, she is very desperate for love (even tho she had a long relationship on which she spent half of her life up until recently because she's been using him as a parent) in order to forget about her depression and insecurities? She really believes that she can't be happy without being in a relationship (even though she's been the same depressed person in relationship too, with which her so gave up because he had to do everything including work and home)? The thing is that I feel horrible for her and I want her to understand that it's better to spend time on having some good life moments rather than trying to leech of any random man she meets in videogames, but I know all she gonna do is say and think that I don't get it because I am taken which she is jealous about (to a point she refuses to spend time w me because, and no, farmers, i am bi and she is the straightest woman I have known. I was suggesting her if she would like maybe trying dating women, but she refused).
I feel like there's no point but my empathy is kicking me because this kind of a thing is so common around people, but damn.
No. 622499
>>622495People who say you don't need a relationship to be happy are the most annoying.
All your friends are going to get married at some point, they're not going to keep spending time with you, you have to to something to make sure you don't end up alone when that happens. And even ignoring that, relationships simply matter.
No. 622512
>>622499>All your friends are going to get married at some pointGee, and I wonder why that is… because people like you keep fear mongering until women are willing to settle for literally anything just to be married. And chances are, many of them will end up divorced anyway.
Anon's friend is obviously going to be far worse off if she stays with any random asshole for the sake of it than if she ends up single and with a mediocre social life. As if that's the worst case scenario…
No. 622534
>>622499I feel like you didn't read anon's post at all, her friend wants a relationship just to feel complete. She feels like she can't be happy without being in a relationship. That's not normal or healthy behavior.
>>622495Honestly, no. I've known too many people like your friend and it's exhausting. My ex-coworker was like your friend but in her late 30s and it was the most embarrassing display of pickmeness I'd ever seen. She likely needs more support than you can give.
No. 622537
>>622499Not too sure if you are baiting or something, however I understand your frustration. My friend is surronded by a loving family that takes care of her to a point where her own mother does all housework instead of her. She also has 4 childhood friends that are single and her age, not counting a whole bunch of people who she prefers spending time with: manchilds who are joking that women should be only in the kitchen unironically, while praising shit like Ben Shapiro's sister etc, all because they give her the attention she's carving, no matter how humiliating it looks like: the second she broke up everyone started hitting on her and now all they do is make compliments that always resolve only around sex. Same people also never seen her irl. And she is so brainwashed with tradright propoganda to a point that she thinks this tweet
>>622523 is actually true and how things should be. She is very obsessed with the idea that women are supposed to be nothing but men-pleasing machines and incubators that should also never work a day in their lives (even though she doesn't do anything in a house she lives in and quit her friends job after working for 3 months for the first time in her life because she did not like it and is now spending all her time screaming with fake voice in videogames, pretending to be not like the other women who are ~one of the boys~.
It makes me feel horrible for her. She also, again, like many shuwu fans believe that women "hit the wall". I just want to help.
No. 622543
>>622523That woman is pathetic but also
>pridemoreKek
No. 622599
File: 1599182149707.jpg (8.82 KB, 261x179, IKUZO.jpg)
>>622552I'm so happy for yuo anon, you can do it!
No. 622631
File: 1599186998783.gif (1.14 MB, 268x175, E79AF332-99FA-42F2-BD24-4A3DFB…)
>>622499lol jokes on you my best friend is an asexual academic and my other friends are child free and couples, some of whom don’t believe in marriage. them being coupled off doesn’t make any impact on our friendships whatsoever, work and distance does. miss me with settling for a scrote because some of my friends happen to be in relationships
No. 633442
>>602022I'm 28 years old and I'm still a technical virgin (I only gave oral sex to my first boyfriend at 25 which, he turned out to be married).
I have never felt the itch that much, I sometimes feel horny, watch some gay porn for 3 minutes and that is it. I should feel lucky but I sometimes feel there is something wrong with me.
I sometimes want to cuddle a large human that smells nice and has a deep voice but that is as far as I go with wanting to touch a male.
No. 639804
>>622512This. The divorce rate for marriages is 50 percent anyway. I feel like women are pressured to grab whatever they can just so they don't have to "die alone" or look like crazy dead egg cat ladies in the eyes of others. A lot of my friends who break up with their boyfriends are neurotic about getting into a relationship again and seem to ignore red flags just to grab on to the first guy who drifts by, simply out of fear of being alone. I swear I've had to explain
so many times to confused people that no, I'm not feeling lonely being single and no, I'm not actively looking for a relationship. And they just don't understand why a woman in her 30's would be like this.
>>639793Good for you anon! 30's is the new 20's for many and it's not at all too late to start over again.
No. 640095
>>640090That's how it seems to me as well.
But sadly none of the cute and nice guys were interested in me when I was younger, so now there's just me and guys left who look like they browse 4chan.
No. 640098
>>640096Discord.gg/AApp2sD
I don’t know the first thing about running a discord server
No. 640107
>>602149>>602140I know I'm replying to an old post, but the only reason a man won't get a vasectomy (which are reversible) is because men
love the idea of knocking women up "accidentally" while refusing to get snipped or wear a rubber. It's still hard to get abortions in most places, and BC is a mixed bag of side effects and long term changes to your body, but the snip is easy, low pain, amd reversible. There's no reason a man who says he doesn't want kids shouldn't get it, except maybe the secret appeal of being able to derail a woman's life with his dick and pretend it can't be helped.
No. 640129
>>640119Most came after the birth of the second child. That has been a theme, splitting up while the second child is a toddler, but being fine up until that second birth.
I'm childless and divorced though, I just think we married too young in my case.
No. 640133
>>639356I have the same problem with my friends. Only a couple years ago all of us just wanted to have fun, had so many dreams, even wanted to live together etc and then they get a random guy, and boom, suddenly everything changes. And the way most girls immediately throw their entire being into the relationship, move together as early and quickly as possible, it feels as if that's all they've been waiting for. My former makeup loving, JB/Harry Styles fan friend is now watching american football because of her nearly 40 and already a father bf - I should be allowed to find this weird.
I also hate how many suddenly no longer have time for you, and then much later you find out it's because they were dating all along, please at least be honest.
Until last year I still had some single friends and even the ones who were in relationships still hung out with us, but now I'm the only one left without a bf. My first friend will by a mother next month and honestly I'm not ready for this. Thinking how childish she still acts (and looks) and then seeing her with a child of her own…I honestly don't want to.
I also know so many teens who already have serious relationships with longterm boyfriends who move in together long before me despite being much younger then me, I just don't get why everybody is rushing so much? We have good chances of living til 100 or more, so why think about starting your own family as soon as you're no longer a minor? Especially in first world countries people have the means to fully enjoy their youth/life, yet so many women don't live much differently than women many decades ago, who contrary to them didn't have a choice. "Women are allowed to be housewives and mothers!" - yes, but then why are so many middle aged people so unhappy? And why is it usually only the women giving up on her original dreams/plans?
I really wish I at least wouldn't live so far on the countryside, I think the situation in bigger cities is likely a lot better/easier for modern minded women.
Sorry for the long rant
No. 640137
>>640107Recently I’ve seen posts on Reddit from MGTOW guys saying they’ve had vasectomies and they enjoy exposing the women who date them and try to baby trap. The one that led me down this rabbit hole made a post on r/childfree asking where the good child-free women are, while they have previous comments saying they’re not interested in serious relationships and just want sex flings. You act like trash and get the flies mate.
This might be a little off-topic but it definitely made me more wary about the ways single older men think
No. 640138
>>640133You need to get some different friends. They just seem
Low quality to me imo
No. 640173
>>640133>And why is it usually only the women giving up on her original dreams/plans?Because men are more likely to pressure them due to societal expectations etc, and also because women tend to study and pursue what they enjoy rather than what makes money (sometimes well-paid industries become low-paid because a lot of women start joining, but that's a story for another time).
I live in the richest country in Europe and it's almost a stereotype here: husband works in IT, engineering or (if less educated) oil, wife is a part-time kindergarten/handicrafts/elementary school teacher or nurse and stays at home with the kids. When husband's company wants him to relocate, wife drops everything because she earns less and they move.
It really saddens me to see this (I work in IT myself so I see it a lot) but most men will see nothing wrong with this and think having your wife give up everything so you can pursue your dreams is perfectly normal and expected if you're married. Then eventually he gets bored of playing house and they divorce because his midlife crisis is hitting and he wants to bang young chicks just to prove to himself he can, also he suddenly wants to be a pilot.
Now mom has to support herself and kids on a kindergarten teacher salary.
No. 640189
>>640173>I live in the richest country in Europe and it's almost a stereotype here: husband works in IT, engineering or (if less educated) oil, wife is a part-time kindergarten/handicrafts/elementary school teacher or nurse and stays at home with the kids. When husband's company wants him to relocate, wife drops everything because she earns less and they move. Exactly the same.
What's even sadder for me is that I'm about to be an elementary school teacher (I just don't have any interests and I'm way too dumb for stuff like IT), and all the girls around me are doing this because it's one of the easiest jobs if you want family, but I don't want that… When I was 18 I thought I don't give af about money, I want free time and to enjoy life, but now I wish I had chosen a job that offers better pay, so that I could at least spoil myself. Plus, if I went for a different field, people might not annoy me so much to get myself a man, because I would be too busy and successful for that.
No. 640271
>>640198>>640209It kind of comes across a bit as blaming girls for taking the "lazy" route. Statistics prove that boys are better in science while girls are better in stuff like languages, so you can't generalize and say that science is hard and the rest is easy.
The problem is that society values those things differently: people love shitting on jobs like teachers, while thinking it's justified that people in some tech company earn high wages, but shouldn't you pay the people whom you entrust you're children and their future well? Isn't that an even more important job?
My friend is studying IT and they're like 3 girls in 100 students, who would want to do that?
I also know many girls and women who studied their ass of while their men went to lower schools and in the end it's still her who ends up cutting back on work or staying at home, simply because that's what society tells you is normal.
No. 640299
>>640271>It kind of comes across a bit as blaming girls for taking the "lazy" routeNo, this is not what I am saying and it's not the point. I'm saying the opposite, that girls are discouraged due to the demographic of some fields and value different things.
>Statistics prove that boys are better in science while girls are better in stuff like languages so you can't generalize and say that science is hard and the rest is easy. This is an old myth. Girls do better than boys in both at school.
I also never said that one is hard and the other is easy, that is your own conclusion. "Stressful" doesn't mean hard, it means your peers are competing with you for a commission or a job you want, it means you might be harassed in the workplace if you're not a part of a boys' club, or your boss expects a lot from you without giving much in return. That is dumb and childish behavior, but it's how a lot of men function in some fields.
>people love shitting on jobs like teachers, while thinking it's justified that people in some tech company earn high wages, but shouldn't you pay the people whom you entrust you're children and their future well? Isn't that an even more important job? I agree, you should, but I'm not shitting on teachers in the first place. I also mentioned here
>>640173 "sometimes well-paid industries become low-paid because a lot of women start joining, but that's a story for another time". Nobody is attacking kindergarten teachers, it's the opposite.
>My friend is studying IT and they're like 3 girls in 100 students, who would want to do that? Yes, which is also why fewer girls go into IT, not because they're lazy. See point one.
No. 640371
>>640355Well since we now have equal opportunity and quantitative testing in schools, women are surpassing men kek. But now they whine about how school isn't 'designed for boys' anymore… Seems they forgot that back in the day students were physically beat. I guess men can only learn if it's under threat of physical punishment?
There's also that very funny study about how girls do better in girl only classrooms, but boys do worse in boys only classrooms.
No. 640380
File: 1601253271451.jpg (31.97 KB, 745x538, 118325333_2840858362680566_829…)
>>640311But there's even less women in STEM fields than before. Why?
No. 640422
>>640412Man this is so accurate. One of the female managers at my last job had a big “girl boss” poster and everything, but the culture there was still absolute trash for women. What a joke.
I’ve worked in a niche male dominated field for most of my adult life and it’s just a gigantic headache. Used to be able to put up with it when I was younger, now it feels like I can’t go a day without wanting to tell someone off.
No. 640436
>>640422Oh damn, i was hoping these things would get easier with age/experience.
Thats the worst thing, you can't even tell them to fuck off or say anything because then you're the emotional female feminazi, but if you just take it no one respects you and the workplace gets even more hostile as they escalate the locker room talk and things like harassment. There really is no winning against a bad culture like this, if i wasn't dumb when it comes to chemistry i would change fields in a heartbeat.
No. 640608
>>640380As someone who dropped out of stem: Hostile males. Constantly. Everywhere. I aged like 9 years in 2 due to the stress. Men see that stem is the new boys club to make money in, and they really ramped up the gatekeeping. Constantaly stealing my ideas, doing a shit job in their group work, sabotaging me, refusing to cooperate and communicate, negging shit, changing plans at last minute so I have to redo my work, men bugging me during classes so I can't focus properly, profs and TAs taking side of men, you're a feminazi if you have any complaints, etc…
The just get a high paying job is a meme, as soon as women join the workforce the pay drops because higher ups men get bitter and don't want women to be financially independent.
No. 640623
>>640105Everyone starts to panic at 25 because they still believe in le wall meme. Once you pass 30 you realize that your life didn't end and you're still a real person. This thread exists because older farmers got tired of teenagers being retarded and wanted a space for themselves but even here the 23-year olds come to frantically cry about "I'm almost 30 and I haven't achieved anything and I'm turning old and ugly please reassure me I'll be okay" and I wish they stopped that shit.
>>640271In my country girls outperform boys in maths AND linguistics in school but still choose to not pick STEM. It's 100% about girls not being encouraged to do so and them not receiving peer support. After years of working in STEM (computer science) it was the rockiest road to get my career going because I didn't have role models, connections of any gender representation and it was hard, but honestly I hope to inspire younger girls by being a success story and I've vowed to help out any female juniors out and shield them from abuse and exploitation if it killed me.
Also wanting to even out the gender gap in STEM doesn't mean anyone's belittling the importance of non-STEM fields or that girls shouldn't choose them. It's just about that STEM absolutely needs more women and they shouldn't be barred by social pressure or feeling that they're too inadequate.
>>640608To be perfectly honest I've barely encountered this, the rare women I come across are extremely cool too. I don't live in the US and I'm ESL though so it might make a difference. I mean I can't say that the field is free of this bullshit because scrote brogrammers are cancerous and should be eradicated but having heard horror stories from other male-dominated fields (like sales, construction and the police force) I think it's a lot better at least over in my country.
No. 640644
>>640625tbh I was in a non-STEM field and the few men we had were just as lazy and annoying and the girls were more responsible 100% of the time as long as they were over 18.
They knew how to talk their way out of doing work and leave girls to do the hard stuff, and then they'd just show up on the last day like clockwork and go "uhh… sorry I was absent, I had an accident/my grandma died again/I accidentally washed my cat in the washing machine and it shrunk, is there any work left for me to do? I can do the presentation :)".
No. 640647
File: 1601309667044.png (22.09 KB, 128x128, received_807828262899176.png)
For my 26th birthday I've gifted myself with doctorate studies. I've applied, got in and next month will be starting my research in computer science field. Hopefully in 4 years time I'll be able to call myself a PhD.
Generally I feel that just now I've started to come into myself as a person and I'm feeling the best I've felt in a while. Both physically and mentally.
Im really looking forward to what life will offer, because now I've understood that we can achieve so much and are so much more than other people say we are.
Sorry for blog post, I usually just lurk, but I really wanted to share.
No. 640691
>>640616It seems that math and physics can be more chill than comp sci or engineering when it comes to pushing women out from what ive heard, even the graph shows the gender balance closer to 50%.
Im guessing degrees in these fields will be seen as useless for the most
toxic guys who go into tech for money and because of games so they gather into the other two.
>>640623You are a good person anon, im sure you will help many other girls who feel singled out in the field succeed too.
>>640647Congrats!! You can do it for sure, never doubt that youre capable
No. 641149
>>641115Anon, that's amazing! Unfortunately I have student loans in debt, but I'm saving as much as I can and simplifying my life to hopefully allow me to only work part time in the future so I can enjoy my free time more.
I hope you reach your goals and that you'll get a never-ending flow of inspiration for your drawings.
No. 641601
>>641149Oof yeah student loans are a pain but you'll have it paid off before you know it.
And thanks, I'm so close to my goal I'm excited. Just gotta work and be patient a little longer.
No. 641654
>>641604Retiring young is my goal yeah. I've got enough saved up to live job free for at least several years, but I'm going to save even more. I'm debt free(mortgage and student loans paid off) and my only expenses are insurance, utilities, and my cats. Going to replant a garden and grow my own food to save more money. Tbf tho I'm such an introvert homebody its easy to save money. Drawing is like my only hobby too.
I hope you can reach your goal as well.
No. 641777
>>640105Are you OK? We have a thread for it
because it isn't real but we were led to believe it was.
No. 646981
File: 1601937978126.jpg (14.95 KB, 240x240, 1a38ada3-1a44-46f1-82fc-a200db…)
I'm gonna be 26 in 4 months and I feel so fucking old. When I was 23 people still assumed I'm 15-16, and now when I'm 25 people usually think I'm 22 I guess, because they don't ask for my ID anymore. Is it possible that high stress and shitty sleeping schedule aged me that quickly? I look sick and anemic, my skin is shit, my hair is shit. Other women my age look so radiant, I look like death
No. 647072
>>646981>When I was 23 people still assumed I'm 15-16>now I'm 25 people usually think I'm 22This sort of age leap seems to happen a lot and imho it's just because society sorts people into child, teen, young adult and middle aged. Or in the case of women, jailbait, fair game and hitting the wall (Ew).
People are really bad at guessing specific ages, so instead of us steadily ageing at a year at a time we just get suddenly shifted to the next age group at random intervals. Also everyone I know quickly looked older during their first year in a job after leaving education, but then it settled down again.
On another note, calm down. Everything you're panicking about is what anons who are getting older always panic about in every vent thread. It's tiring as shit to see yet another twentyspomething say they feel so old
No. 663870
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No. 669356
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>the draft being male-only ruled unconstitutional
>elites consider expanding it to women
>joe biden is considered president-elect
>tfw older than 25 and before any changes were made
I don't even care about the number.
No. 680831
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Was wondering if anyone else feels like this - in terms of love, I'm very happy to take my sweet time finding the person I'd call my life partner, and am not terribly anxious about aging hindering that (I luckily have the example of my parents, who didn't get married til they were both 35, and my cousin who got married in her 40s). But now that I'm in my late 20s, every couple of months, a friend, acquaintance, or even someone I knew from high school will announce their engagement. And then I get this weird pang of jealousy and maybe even anxiety.
I'm thinking it might be because I associate marriage with financial stability and an end to the "hustle", due to the double income. And yeah, sure, partly because I'm lonely and would like to meet someone I'd call a life partner. I'm still parsing what my feelings mean. But I wonder if anyone else is as wary of engagement announcements as I am, for reasons of their own?
No. 680842
>>680831Kinda? I’m 26 so have a few years until I’m inundated with them. An acquaintance (1 year older) got engaged this year and I felt so fucking strange, so I kind of understand the confused feelings. It wasn’t traditional jealousy, but an odd feeling that I’d known her for years and our lives had correlated at times but now she was off on the next stage and I had no idea when or even if I would join her. It made me feel abnormal even though most of our peers aren’t yet engaged. I imagine that feeling is much more intense when it’s someone you’re close to.
Another part of it was that her shitty relationship had apparently completely recovered, whereas mine had failed. She was also getting something she really wanted (which made me jealous in the way that I wasn’t getting good experiences in general rather than re: engagement).
I never made much sense of my feelings because they broke it off within weeks so I got no further than that, anon. Just sounding off here.
I think you just have to keep in mind that you can’t force these things. It’s not like working at getting a promotion; you can’t get engaged through sheer effort. You could go on a hundred dates and still never click with anyone until you have a chance encounter. And sure it would be great to have more money and someone to cuddle at night, but relationships and marriage have issues too. The grass is always greener on the other side.
No. 680847
>>680831I'm also late 20s and I don't get that feeling mainly because all the older couples I know lead boring lives and there's barely any romance left after a few years. A few of my acquaintances that got married early after high school also resulted just like that.
And being hit on by married men also makes you not want to tie yourself to anyone.
The only thing I do envy is financial stability but I wouldn't want to depend on anyone for that.
Like the other anon said, it's probably normal if you were close with someone and now they've reached this imaginary milestone that's perceived as a normal passage and part of life and you're going to feel left behind.
You have a healthy mindset so I know I'm preaching to the choir.
No. 680894
>>680875The older I get, the less jelly I am of literally anyone or their relationships. My life isn't even great at all, but I've seen a lot of my friends stick it out with shitty relationships for the sake of ~being with someone~ and it sounds like torture to me.
One of my friends is always bragging about her amazing boyfriend, but I know he's cheated on her before and still hasn't proposed after 8+ years. It's not worth it to care about anyone else's relationship. Be happy for other people, sure, but don't lose sleep thinking they got it all made.
No. 682117
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Half a century old. The only depressing thing about getting older is seeing how people who were exciting/interesting/unconventional turn into mindnumbingly dull individuals when they hit their 30s.
Settling down with a partner and breeding really changes a person. Not that I have anything against that lifestly, but right up until my mid 40s, those old friends were telling me "it's not late" to spawn. Sometimes I wondered if they were so pissed off being parents they begrudged the fact I didn't have children or a husband and wanted me to experience their misery.
Now I have few female friends because I can't relate.
I still live for music and go to gigs (obviously not right now). I love being at the front being bashed and bruised by old punks because the whole gig thing is still a thrill I've never lost. It's always males who seem to not feel they have to conform to what a 40 something should behave like or look like.
When a couple of girl friends divorced they wanted to hang out with me again. I thought, sure. I'm still friends with one of them because her daughter's 19 so doesn't live at home. When we're together she livens up and she feels she can have some fun again like we did in our 20s, but it's difficult because she finds it hard to not have to conform.
Idk what I'm trying to say. Ofc I'm more jaded now, but if I'd lost the passions I had from early adulthood, I'd want to curl up and die.
When I've posted my age on lolcow some anons are all Omg, why are you posting here at your age. I don't get it…
No. 682470
>>682117You sound awesome! May I ask how you ended up finding lolcow? I don't think it's embarrassing to post here, just curious since the user base does seem to skew young. I had myself sterilized a little while back, never had even the tiniest urge to be a mother either. It's tough to find childfree friends, becoming a parent is pushed on us so often as the ultimate feminine ideal and just "what you're supposed to do." I definitely think the brainwashing can run deep.
These may seem like stupid questions, but how did you find your passions and maintain them? I sometimes have difficulty giving myself permission to enjoy things as an adult. I feel like I should always be working or doing things for other people. When I end up engaging with something I like, afterwards I wonder what the point was. Like it was another short-term hit of dopamine but my life is ultimately pointless, so why bother? I know we have to come up with our own purposes in life and I have some issues with depression so that's probably playing into it. I'm just wondering what it feels like for you to fully allow yourself to enjoy something, especially when others tell you you're supposed to be enjoying life in a totally different way.
No. 682481
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>>682117I am honored to read this, may your days in the farm be plentiful and sunny
No. 682780
>>682117All the love to you lady, you honestly sound like my future. I'm 30 and already horrified of the thought of losing my female friends when they start raising families and being just a one time a year fun night out to them.
>Ofc I'm more jaded now, but if I'd lost the passions I had from early adulthood, I'd want to curl up and die. Relatable. I've always resisted the thought of giving my whole identity up when I grow older.
No. 767738
>>767705I'm 29
nonnie. It's great. I somehow started gaining confidence after 25, and also being more in control of my life. I think you'll love it if you embrace it.
No. 767762
>>767739>>767753If you want to be perceived as older and more serious, style is the key. People react very differently to you depending on what you're wearing. If you have a serious and elegant wardrobe they won't ever address you as a kid.
My language has a regular and polite "you", and depending on how I dress I will get called one or the other. If dressed casual I will get a casual you, if dressed professional I will get a polite you. Clothes are far more important than age when it comes to how people treat you.
No. 776091
I just turned 34 and I feel depressed af. I don't feel like I "fit in" as a adult for many reasons, my personality, communication style and style of dress is so child-like people regularly mistake me for 25-27 (I have a slavic/ethnically ambiguous babyface that further confuses americans, but my own people can immediately clock me). My life has been significantly influenced by several periods of destructive NEET/friendless Femceldom, BPD, crippling OCD/social anxiety, and depression, and I feel like I am kind of still stuck in my mid 20s lifewise, still "working out" things like career, money, relationships, going to shitty parties trying to network or meet new people ect. Since covid I feel like I've degraded because my social group got limited to only my closest friends, which is literally 4 people. I literally know people ten years younger than me who are fully independent, who regularly mistake me for their age. Its so humiliating, I have no idea how I can find a normal man since I can no longer use youth as an excuse for being a fuckup.
On the plus side I now have stable, long-terms relationships with a group of people who care about me, not BPD anymore and significantly less OCD and anxiety, and know who I am as a person and what I like and don't like, which I didn't have for basically my entire teens and 20s, so hopefully I will never be a true NEET or Femcel again. /sage for blogsperging.
No. 1042110
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HRH at 37 proves 'the wall' is scrote cope