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No. 566277
Feel like shit? Want to vent among the infighting? Here’s the place to do that,
Previous thread:
>>>/ot/558342 No. 566289
File: 1591440305916.jpg (29.02 KB, 481x524, Chj9xqfW0AASQ5m.jpg)
When I look in the mirror I like the way I look. Been into fitness for like 4 years now, gained some muscle and all, love lifting and just being active, but today I took some before pictures since I'm starting a new program and I want to bawl my eyes out. I look so doughy and disgusting in the pictures wtf, it literally looks like I never worked out in my entire life and like I'm just skinny fat deapite having some definition, especially in my legs.
I hope the fucking phone is wrong.
No. 566290
>>566281I second that. We have that in the dumbass and unpopular thread right now and it gets out of hand, it would be better off contained within a dedicated thread and have these thread be compassionate.
Also, I would like anon to fight me on some stuff.
No. 566293
>>566289you're a human in motion. your muscles show when you walk, reach for the salt shaker on the table, grab your purse etc.
also, phones make you look different and most fitness people you see online flex for their pictures, even if they're "casual".
having some fat on your body doesn't mean you're skinny-fat, you're just normal.
No. 566303
File: 1591441282737.png (Spoiler Image,1.72 MB, 1148x800, venussss.png)
This is just sad
No. 566319
>>566303weenus just reminds me of the nobody idols i see on social media. heavy filters and pretending doing gravure/softcore porn for old men is a great goal to have. i'm not shocked but it's still depressing. those girls were made to believe at a young age that they could aim for that.
even one idol i like who's very much not known for sexy pics said she was originally inspired by "junior gravure" aka kiddie porn. kms this world is rotten
No. 566355
File: 1591447949602.jpg (35.08 KB, 512x512, ergh.jpg)
I have a digital scale in my bathroom and I like to check on my weight every morning just to be sure that my food choices generally reflect a downward trend of weight loss. It had been good, but I think my scale glitched out. The other day I was 147, but then I ate bad (a ridiculous amount of sushi one day, and then taco bell/kfc the next. I checked it yesterday and while it briefly flashed my 140s weight on the scale, it then shot to 154. It keeps doing the same thing except today it's 152. Egads, did I really gain five pounds in two days? Maybe my scale was glitchy all along and I was actually in the 150s the entire time and thought I was doing better than I was. I'm trying to not let it get me down but it is discouraging.
No. 566357
File: 1591448384249.jpg (90.18 KB, 785x768, 5xfuqzp3ce251 (1).jpg)
>>5663552 days is not a lot of time for your body to realign itself after a huge sodium intake anon. You need to drink lots of water and flush it out and weigh yourself 3 days from now. This is why you're not supposed to weigh yourself daily. Even if you eat healthy every day, your weight will still fluctuate due to dehydration.
No. 566363
>>566356>>566357>>566360Thanks for keeping me level anons.
Another factor may be the period thing. My bc arm implant expires this month (I haven't had a real period since 2013 because I've been continuously on one), I just don't have the money to get it removed cause uninsured amerifag. So maybe my body is being water retentive because of all the confused hormones as well.
No. 566369
File: 1591449192277.gif (1.49 MB, 320x240, 1590652209845.gif)
i miss being in elementary school and getting those little baskets full of edible grass, chocolate and oranges whenever it was easter
now i'm an adult and miserable as ever
No. 566374
File: 1591449370414.jpg (16.85 KB, 400x400, Small-fluffy-Yellow-Easter-Chi…)
>>566369did you get the gay fluffy chicks
No. 566380
>>566371Yeah that's been the one good thing about it, the last one when it expired I got some spotting but it was swiftly replaced. I've probably saved hundreds in female sanitary products over the years because of it. I'm just shy of 30 and am getting into a serious relationship, I've thought about not renewing it for good. I'm a bit concerned this time around though cause there hasn't been any spotting despite the expiration.
I won't miss the weight gain on a dime though, it's why I've been so paranoid about my diet. Arm implants are notorious for piling on pounds. At the time, it was better than being pregnant for me however. I'm very thankful to have been fat instead of pregnant and stuck with an abuser (who would've messed with my pills and condoms) that's for damn sure.
No. 566392
>>566380Be sure to get it out if you want to stop being on it.
Last time I got mine out + new one in (I'm on my second at 30), the gyno told me if you keep it, it will probably still work for a while before it stops. It doesn't magically stops at the 3 years mark (I was thinking that like a moron and was so fucking anxious to renew it at THE date) it's designed to be a guaranty of 3 years but, given you're not obese, will keep on giving. You just won't really know when it'll give out.
No. 566430
>>566418Being pretty doesn’t get you shit imo. I’ve always been “pretty” and I’ve still been bullied etc.
in fact being pretty makes other woman very judgmental and mean.
No. 566442
>>566436>>566430>pretty privilege doesn’t exist, I’m pretty and all I get is mean women bullying me every dayUh huh. No one said you have to be beautiful to do “real meaningful life things” whatever that means. All of us still have to partake in the meaningless stuff to exist in society, and I promise you the uggos have it worse.
>>566433Or a personality so wack her model face can’t outshine
No. 566449
File: 1591462738588.jpg (48.18 KB, 600x450, 1442211071360.jpg)
I'm scared. Times are so uncertain right now. I work for starbucks and they are giving us a choice to keep working for them but with very uncertain hours or to take 120 days of unpaid leave… I really dont know which one to take. My hours have been all over the place. I was getting 35 for a few weeks ans then went down to 22 hours. Everything is mess. We arent getting covid pay (3 extra per hour) anymore and my paycheck is suffering. I'm just scared guys.
No. 566463
I'm worried that I'm hurting my relationship with my best friend over stupid shit.
We live together (in our 2nd year, we work well as flatmates) but because of corona we've been around each other 24/7.
She started saying the other day that we've been around each other for far too long. I know it's how she feels, but I felt hurt. I'm projecting, but it made me feel like I wasn't a good enough friend for her. She keeps saying that she wishes that our other flatmate was home, even though when the third flatmate is around, she "can only handle so much of her".
I like to listen to J-pop, but I know she doesn't, so in my car we listen to basic pop music. The other day, she turned this around on me, saying that I'm ashamed of my own music taste. But … I'm not. I know she's uncomfortable listening to it, and that it's a niche thing to like, so out of courtesy, I don't play it when she's with me.
I don't think it's wrong to be accommodating, she's weaponizing that against me. It's a little bit aggravating that she always has to "win" our "arguments". Recently it's happening more, and getting increasingly nitpicky.
I don't want these little fights to escalate. But at the same time, I worry that I'm being crazy about the whole thing. She's like a few traits away from being a Stacy, and I'm someone who goes on lolcow in her free time, so maybe I'm just being a clingy loser?
No. 566466
>>566463Maybe it's time to have a friendship break up before it gets ugly and she tells it to your face.
It's what I'd do.
No. 566473
>>566463I think you should bypass the dumb mechanics/topics of the arguments themselves and talk to her about how she's actually feeling and how you have been feeling. Try to see if it's possible to level on how this quarantine process is messing with both of you. Try to come from a compassionate place, "you did xyz to me!" might not work too well. Crucial Conversations is a nice and short book about how to handle high tension convos, highly rec'd for situations where you don't wanna just butt heads like a caveman.
When people you've previously been on great terms with suddenly start picking fights, it's usually because there's something wrong with them internally and they're lashing out to relieve tension. If it's a bf/gf it can come from really shitty stuff like them cheating and feeling guilty, but obv with a platonic relationship it's not gonna be that.
You're not her therapist but you're best friends so cutting the BS and talking about the real issue instead of proxy wars over dumb shit is useful.
No. 566492
>>566467>being rich can be a high factor too. That’s why pretty rich kids end up being the worst types of people.Money is time and ways (products) to be pretty and dress well. Always hated how some persons are complimented for their looks just because they have money to invest into custom and better quality stuff.
It's pure envy and added anger at the system, kek.
No. 566535
>>566436>I’m giving my honest viewpoint as an attractiveLol sure Jan.
While you are correct, the way you say it sounds insufferable
No. 566548
>>566418You sound bitter and immature, people stop caring about appearance at a certain point and just that won't do anyway
But everyone will always like a loveable person with a fun personality no doubt
No. 566552
>>566548nta but just lol.
How out of touch do you have to be to make a claim like that? Sure, some people can like you as a person but having good looks makes everything so much easier and that was the point anon was making.
No. 566558
>>566430>>566436I've always been considered very attractive too, and I have to disagree. Through out life I have gotten away with pulling a lot of bullshit bc even when I'm out right doing shit I'm not supposed to be doing people don't care bc I look "sweet and pretty" And therefore innocent. And it's not just from coomers and beta orbiter either, female teachers and female bosses have let me get away with shit too.
And me being cute leads to everyone babying me and lets me be a lazy fuck who rides on the back of others, with out them even really caring (I try not to take advantage of this but it's easy to fall in too)
Anon (>>566442) might be right. Maybe you're personality makes others not like you. I'm reasonably kind along with being attractive and most people love me and are willing to do things for me.
No. 566561
>>566558Being attractive and performing cuteness is different.
I'm part goblin and people are nicer when I perform cuteness.
No. 566571
File: 1591480186804.gif (983.89 KB, 400x280, tsunoda.gif)
>>566558Thanks for not being a fake bitch. Outward appearance totally counts. Here's my anecdote: I was waiting tables, no degree, no white collar experience. But I'm skinny, cute and asian, so I walked into a law firm, acted all bubbly, lied about my major and GPA, and gave fake references. They just believed me, didn't bother to check any of this shit. Got the job against 25 other applicants. Knew as I left I was gonna get it too because of how nice the boss was treating me and laughing at my mild ass joke.
>>566569Stop being dense. Who said anything about friends and happy relationship? No shit those people should look at you past your appearance, the fuck.
No. 566577
>>566574Just do some bubbly, wide-eyed, really smiley stuff. Be awed a lot and force your face into cute expression of surprise/frowning/pouting and stuff. It's enough to get you by if you do it right.
It's fucking exhausting if you're not used to it, tho. And you're gonna need to practice in front of a miror if you're not a really good actor already.
I'm ashamed to do it. I'm a deadpan person and I'd rather poker face every situation but the treatment I get when I perform is so widely different it's worth the effort, I guess.
No. 566632
>>566619I'm curious as to what the best way to approach stuff like this is
I've faced multiple issues where people expect me to help them with things because I'm "smart" even though they've graduated from college and I dropped out
I want to teach them how to use google and other search engines to find information, but I feel like it requires practice more so than a guide
I've been looking stuff up for years, but I guess people aren't as used to finding things on the internet as me?
No. 566660
>>566618I know there aren't many around right now because COVID has fucked everything up but you should def try going to an open mic in your area
there's also comedy writing, maybe you might enjoy that?
No. 566686
File: 1591499319459.jpg (52.83 KB, 406x700, scp1471.jpg)
I keep thinking OP is an SCP monster. Like 682, or pic related.
No. 566693
File: 1591500641644.jpeg (163.32 KB, 1125x1105, D2ADDD36-3D11-4772-A72D-6F2F95…)
I have too much anxiety and existential dread and everything I draw looks like absolute garbage
No. 566699
File: 1591501663213.jpeg (15.43 KB, 223x243, 1DF77634-5F20-4737-9C6F-197429…)
I suck so bad at holding a conversation on the phone. I’m a better listener than talker, but I wish I was both. When it comes to texting I have no problem and I hate it because I’m so used to it. Sigh.
No. 566716
File: 1591504527892.jpeg (96.96 KB, 907x1360, 455EC0DD-8711-4A97-B4CF-853BE3…)
>>566713I’m going to be 26 next week and all I can think about is everyone in my age group is having children etc and all I want to do is spend the rest of my life playing video games and staying away from people. It irked me five years ago the pressure of needing a career or social standing, now sitting back and seeing how miserable everyone else is regardless of what they do, I’m content as fuck not doing a god damn thing.
I’m still pissed I was born, I think. I just see the world and everyone in it and I want no part of it.
I’m sober right now, too, and that brings a whole new meaning to why am I even alive.
No. 566732
>>566719I give you my condolences for dealing with gross men/boys.
It's hard to find male friends without getting a "creepy" vibe from them. Most of my male friends from high school + college were gay, bi, or awkward boys. If a man has the capacity to be attracted to me, there is the nagging feeling in the back of my head that they'll develop an unhealthy interest in me. This isn't necessarily a healthy way to approach friendships with men. It might make you cautious and paranoid. But establishing boundaries is paramount – and if interacting with them is too uncomfortable, then break it off.
I was told, at age 20 during work, that a divorced father of two (coworker) was interested in dating me. He had never talked about anything of the sort to me. It shocked me, and I had to endure daily "pleasant" conversation until I quit 6 months later. A couple years later, I heard that he was making "pleasant" conversations with another young, shy woman. I've had a couple other "friends" like that, and I've had to slowly peter off conversing with them (I couldn't be sudden because I'm kind of cowardly. Don't be like me!!)
If you're interested in more "niche" interests (art, music, video games, etc), you're more likely to come across well-rounded, passionate people IN ADDITION to socially awkward, selfish, creepy people (men). Pathetic men think that polite women are an easy target, and leech onto them. Pull off those leeches as soon as possible. Be polite until they strike a nerve or cross a boundary, which may occur sooner or later. If you want nothing to do with them, being curt and indifferent trumps politeness.
NEVER let someone make you feel bad for not dating someone. Good on you for rejecting weird men. Even if they insult you – you can explain yourself briefly, or you can say, "You make me uncomfortable/unhappy. Don't talk to me again." Or say nothing, and let your silence speak for itself.
Don't feel obligated to be friends with men. Friendships can be stressful, whether men or women. The friendships you develop over the years can be a somewhat random, stumbling process. If by chance or by choice, none of your friends are men, then there's no need to worry about it.
As for your sexuality:
Is there a possibility that your bad experiences with men have curbed a possible attraction to men? Yes, perhaps.
People develop crushes and interests at different rates. Whether you attracted to men, women, or both, is for something for you to discover at your own pace. You don't have to label yourself or "prove" yourself to anyone if you don't want to. Talking with friends or trusted family about crushes (real-life, celebrity, TV show character, whatever) could be a good way to reflect on how you feel about others you may be interested in. Or it's fine to keep to yourself, or discuss things online, or just listen to other's experiences. But it's nothing to be pressured into.
If you are non-straight, you might have internal pressure to curb towards straightness (because of society). Don't be critical of yourself if you have normal attractions and normal crushes.
Just because you have the capacity for romantic or sexual attraction doesn't mean that you have to date, either.
It took me until age 22 to consider that it's fine to not date anyone. Maybe you'll date a lot or a little, or not at all. Whatever is fine – just note that dating many people might lead to more heartbreak/stress, and not dating at all may make you feel more inadequate.
I realize I sound like a crazy anti-dating person, haha. But I had a lot of insecurities as a teen and young adult that I was "missing out on life", falling behind societal milestones, etc. And yeah, I am DEFINITELY an isolated person, with just a couple family members and friends to talk to. But I feel more secure in myself; my fear/apprehension in approaching men I was interested in almost protected me from a lot of emotional pain and pressure.
And I sort of look like an egg, which keep most men at a distance. At younger ages I was constantly insecure about my appearance, but now I am looking at my face as neutral rather than pretty or ugly. I've never done makeup or styled myself up, so I've grown to be more comfortable as myself (a work-in-progress, of course.)
So be strong, have high standards for yourself, and be patient with self-discovery!
No. 566738
>>566732>>566719 That answer is really good advice, I couldn’t have said any better. I would just like to add that 18 years old is still really young and at that age, I hadn’t met any man worth spending any time with. At that age any guy you will interact romantically with is either around the same age and thus extremely immature, or older than you and thus clearly has something wrong with them for wanting to interact romantically with a teenager.
In my early twenties though, I’ve met men that I’ve had amazing relationships with and who actually made me grow and made me a better person. With age and experience you also start being able to tell right away which guys are decent human beings and which ones are worthless or won’t give you any respect become you’re a woman.
So as the other anon said be patient and have high standards.
No. 566792
>>566303I’m sorry but.. this looks ridiculous, underneath the layer of desparation and sadness that this image reeks, it kinda makes me laugh.
How fucking degrading, she looks so out of place you can tell how hard she’s trying and for what? $10 a pop kek this is hilarious in some way. The way she’s posing reminds me of a cryptid, she’s meitud to shit and frankly that getup is atrocious, I can’t with these weeaboos
No. 566793
I'm so fucking depressed because of my housemate. Him being around makes me so demotivated and just makes me want to give up on everything. I wake up, think 'today will be a productive day!' he gets up at the same time, gets to the bathroom earlier than I do and shits for fucking 30 minutes. He doesn't fucking wash his hands (I'd know, because my bedroom is right next to the bathroom and I hear everything) so I don't even want to TOUCH the door handle, and how the fuck an I supposed to want to use a bathroom he just fucking shat in?? It takes an hour for the stench to go away. I feel disgusting because of another person's actions, how is that fair?
He plays dubstep loudly almost all day, my earphones are broken, so I can never be in quiet, and of course I'm in a bad mood being forced to listen to his shitty music. Our walls are paper thin, so I don't even want to work out in fear of him hearing because it's embarrassing. Then I can hear my other housemate talk on the phone angrily from the fucking kitchen below me. No matter where I go in the house I always hear other people and no one ever listens to me. I just want to give up. I don't even want to leave my room to eat, I'm afraid to work out, every other self-improve bullshit I just want to give up on. And it's already so hard to get to sleep, so me trying to get up earlier than my housemate who already has an irregular sleeping pattern just adds on extra stress. What the fuck am I supposed to do? How am I supposed to be happy like this? How am I supposed to be motivated to do the simplest things like eat or brush my teeth like this? My mental health is so fragile these days that if I don't get proper sleep or work out or eat I have mental breakdowns for hours. I think I'll just accept that I'll kill myself sooner or later because the only things I was doing that actually helped I'm afraid to do now. Because he moved in. I want to bash my head against a wall. I can't take this anymore. I just want to give up.
>inb4 just move out!1!!1!
It takes time, you know?
Haha, to make matters worse they're not even random people, the disgusting one is my older brother and the other is my father. I just say 'housemates' because I'm too disgusted with them to even admit they're family.
I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to eat. Today will be another day I waste by just playing vidya, because everything else makes me want to kill myself and no one else in the entire world cares.
No. 566796
>>566794Kek, how old is actually your toddler bro?
Any idea what arretested his development?
No. 566798
>>566795Anon, how should I go about distancing myself from her? I mean, I don't really wanna break her heart or anything.Thing is, I wouldn't even feel too bad not talking to her anymore, because it just feels like a chore since all we do is talk about her. She is kinda weird though, today she made a whole video of just pics of herself and asked me to watch it all. She uploaded it to her insta-story too.
Hope you made some good friends, anon.
No. 566813
>>566803If you're not just trolling, it's pretty obvious that he's got some autism going on there.
20 years ago in the UK he'd just be assumed to be a weird asshole. I mean I guess he still is but autism is why.
No. 566830
>>566820>all she’s doing is saying the same “women = MENSTRUATING AND VAGINAS AND BIRTH”No offense but you're reaching for outrage. Her point is that there are biological differences between men and women. Whether or not your reproductive system works is irrelevant, the fact is you were BORN with them whereas a man who identifies as a woman was never born with those things. Certain functions like menstruation, childbirth, and menopause are things men will never experience. It's not that if a woman doesn't experience these things it doesn't make her a woman. You. are. a. biological. woman. A man will never be.
You ought to know there's a point being made here, and Rowling clearly isn't some redneck male trying to guilt women into insecurity for their unwillingness or inability to spawn his brood. Rowling obviously doesn't think infertile women are "failures" come on!
No. 566855
I now weigh more than my bf. He's a little taller and leaner but with more muscle, and I have a bit too much fat than average, but gym staff insinuated it was due to my fat tits, anyway.
He's always weighed at least 5kg more than me, at LEAST. But with the gym shutdown, slowly giving up on our exercise routines due to new aches and pains, and rediscovering the joy of baking I've gained quick. He weighed himself and I was like lmao getting up there in weight huh? Food been too good? Then I weighed myself and was the EXACT SAME WEIGHT, so I stood off it because maybe it just showed the old value, stepped on and SAME WEIGHT. I was astounded and told him I can't believe it, then he was like "oh hold on" and proceeded to pull out HIS WALLET AND PHONE from his DENIM PANTS, and I was in a light cotton tshirt and shorts. I took the scales and am keeping them away from him until I've lost some weight. FUCK.
No. 566856
File: 1591541712291.jpeg (75.59 KB, 720x550, 1F8979F2-F5C3-4401-8480-E7F503…)
>>566845Yeah I sort of figured that was the case. I just left him on read, and he hasn’t messaged me after that. I don’t really feel sad about it just pissed off. I hadn’t even thought about him after our hookup, so that really came out of nowhere.
Why must men be such cumbrains jfl
No. 566867
>>566845That's possible but my money would be on him being convinced by his current dangerhair gf that 24m and 19f is basically MAP shit, grooming and statutory (twitter/tumblr statutes) rape.
Either way ignore the dickhead.
No. 566868
>>566867Idk I kind of doubt, he really didn’t seem the type to date that type of girl.
I also forgot the best/worst part, he said that I was hot, but in the way an eastern european prostitute is (which sounds pretty fucking creepy tbh)
No. 566882
>>566881I don’t really know tbh. I guess he feels bad (or at least wants me to think he does), about finding sad broken girls attractive.
I found the comment pretty ironic considering he is half russian and I’m only like 1/16th. Some guys are just weird and dumb I guess.
No. 566908
>>566732Thanks for the advice! I find it really helpful and we had very similar experiences, it was really helfull and encouraging to read.I hate men trying to take adventage of shy girls like us, ugh…
I am currently isolated and friendless, but i don't feel lonely and in the contrary i feel much better from when i had friends. I feel like i never had a true friendship, the post i did was telling all my friendships during my 18 years of life, none of them were good lol. Men normally prey at me, none of them ever told me why they liked me or showed any kind of interest in my hobbys, they just confessed or asked me if they could kiss me and when i rejected them they got dissapointed, i am glad that despite my shy appereance i am actually not afraid to say no. I feel like i gained my right to hate men, 5 terrible experiences would turn off anyone from dating ever. Women aren't as bad but they only use me as tech support when something happens in their home and they don't want strange men to come (it's actually a really nice job) but i feel they don't see me as equal, more like a tomboy who has nothing in common with them.
I am 100% straight though, i am more into gentle men that take care of themselves and dress nicely, but all of them are gay lol.
I just feel so out of place, i am femenine but i have more masculine interest so i am never seen by equal by none, men just prey on me and women think i am weird. Oh well, i quite like this lonely life anyway lol.
The only people i find enjoyment to talk too are old men, all them have been really nice and treated me like their daughter but i really can't call them friends either, we just have nice conversations about life and motorcycles.
No. 566916
>>566851I feel you about the going crazy part but this comes from someone rad-leaning who has constant debates with her libfem friends. I think if you don't feel like you belong to either of groups you should just avoid the discourse, since you seem to be affected by it. I do however wanna say that radical feminism is more than its criticism of transactivism. Maybe your radfem friend is too caught up in that particular aspect but that's mainly because most of the trans community are creepy men with weird fetishes instead of actual dysphoria, and most of do not wish for them or any other man to be part of our activism and hijack it, completely defeating the purpose of feminism.
But you are not worthless and you are not weak. Please don't be so harsh on yourself.
I wish you good luck, and don't let stupid men ruin shit for you!
No. 566956
>>566883>>566916Thanks I try to stay strong, I was kinda spiraling earlier but I feel better now. I know I'm strong if I've managed to come this far!
And I'm more rad-leaning for porn/sexwork/religion/everything else, I've read a lot about all types of feminism (even tradfems lol), I'm just fed up of seeing the same trans/gc discourse! It gives me a lot of anxiety about the future and my place in society for some reason.
>>566930I think you're lucky, but maybe I'm just afraid people won't like me for my beliefs. I know I lack self-confidence.
No. 566969
>>566954Thanks for sharing, keks were had.
But the mail part though, that's where i would draw the line.
No. 566974
>>566954If you can't move out, I think your best move would be to outright ignore her when she does this shit.
Pretend to not hear it, don't respond. If it gets repeted, don't react and talk about something else.
It's the best way to get rid of this kind of behaviour : she wants to see you upset. When she sees you are, she wins and she enjoys it.
I know it's hard but I really think it's your best option at this point if you already have had several sit downs.
No. 567003
>>566974cont.
I have trained bad behavior out off kids, adults alike with this method (shit like pinching and biting, being mean for no reasons like anon's room mate)
You need to set bondaries. You can say once that you won't stand for this shit and that this is your last warning.
After that, start ignoring the bad behavior. Remove yourself completely from the situation if you can.
You're talking and she makes a snide comment? Just up and leave to your room.
At this point, she's using you like a punching bag. That's not a friend behavior and that's not even a room mate behavior.
Don't get caught explaining why again and again it's hurting you. It's not important. It's hurting you and that should be enough. If she asks why you're doing this, you can tell her she know why but don't go further than that and remove yourself.
No. 567015
>>567003Forgot to mention, it's called 'Planned ignoring' in case any of you need it and want to research it.
It's mostly used on kids but it's also a good tool to train your bad or bpd friend/family member/work accointance
No. 567021
>>566954leave that bitch NOW
she's someone who will bring you down to your level, make you crack and then gaslight you and say it isn't a big deal. FUCK THAT STUPID BITCH.
Treat her as if she is nothing and insecure and ghost the bitch.
Buy a lock for your room and find a new flatmate.
No. 567023
>>566954Also PLEASE listen to
>>567015 and
>>567003 . Ignore her and she will start looking like the bad person maybe she will learn to stop acting like a rude cunt. Be careful though, because if she learns quickly and tries to be your friend do not forget what she has done to you and continue to keep your distance and watch your belongings. People like her are children and need the silent treatment to learn to behave. I did this a few years back with a rude "friend" and ghosted her when I had the chance while still being friendly to everyone else. Even if she tries to spread rumors and not change her behavior, people will eventually see that she is the problem and support you. Invest in a security camera and a lock for your room (trust me). Tell her opening your mail is illegal. If she does it again, do not hesitate to report her. She's being soulless to you? Be "soulless" back. Treat her as if she is an afterthought and a child. Watch her explode.
No. 567030
>>566888Lol, I have same problem as your bf but I suffer from pretty bad memory overall.
Maybe it's not laziness but some memory problems?
No. 567061
File: 1591575179827.jpg (12.59 KB, 425x455, 20200525_234530.jpg)
Checked my palm for shits and giggles and i have 0 life line. Great, not unsettling at all.
No. 567075
File: 1591577571421.jpg (48.13 KB, 626x348, 1428495958904.jpg)
I hate Gay pride month. Every June it's the same celebrate gay men and trans bullshit, but lesbians are literally invisible. It sucks being a gay women sometimes when lesbians are either treated as if they dont exist or highly sexualized by men. I hate gay pride month, because as this point it's just super gay men and trans (mtf) month. ugh
No. 567085
File: 1591579253993.gif (927.11 KB, 320x210, giphy (3).gif)
>tfw I had such a bad mental health day between the third friend ditching me this week to in general not feeling like anyone special that I didn't even cry when I wanted to cause my tears can't change how things just are
I wouldn't call myself a bad friend to deserve that treatment, I just think I attract jerks.
No. 567088
>>567079boyfriend of the year over there
>but muh streamzHope you feel better soon anon.
No. 567089
>>567079You shouldnt feel guilty. Maybe go to the hospital? I used to have extreme vertigo. It came out of NOWHERE. I thought it was an ear infection, but i couldnt eat or work without vomiting. Apparently it just happens.
Your boyfriend is shitty for not caring about you though. come on
No. 567147
File: 1591585849837.jpg (25.98 KB, 713x616, 1578714045686.jpg)
I'm worried about my favorite small businesses getting looted (or worse case scenario, the employees get hurt) every day now. Seeing people unironically saying that the violence is justified (talking about the ones who specifically mention the destroying/assaults etc. the ones who post about equality doesn't bother me) or fucking lawyers offering bail to criminals disgust me to no end.
What kind of world do these idiots live in? Do these fucking troglodytes realize they will never learn after this right? These cunts will do it again, and again, AND AGAIN. Oh and I didn't even mention the fact that these small store owners are in a middle of a pandemic that is putting economy and health at a limited state.
Jesus fucking christ why won't these adults do ANYTHING.
I can go on, but I'm so mad right now.
No. 567184
I think I got rid of a bullshitter in my life and it hurts so bad, not because of him but because of what it says about me that these are the kinds of people who I attract.
tl;dr I met some guy online and we wanted to have a relationship. I excused it cause during covid I was more than happy to have someone to talk to and whisper sweet nothings over the phone. He aligned with things I wanted (claimed he was inheriting money for a house, wanted kids, etc). Over time he revealed more and more to the point where he sounded like my ex (no car, low ambition, etc.) I mean, had he first presented himself as a 30 year old car-less, cafe barista with mental issues living with his mom and dad would I have pursued this? Fuck no, he did not present himself that unflatteringly obviously. He didn't have plans to get a car or more meaningful work, but used covid as an alibi. "I can't do anything right now cause of covid." Yet when I pressed him about his ex relationships it sounded like he was the exact same person pre-covid too. When I pointedly asked him what he'd do if his family weren't letting him live at home and if he wasn't getting an inheritance, his only response was "well that's impossible that wouldn't happen," as if that was a satisfactory answer. He doesn't have a timeline or any tangible plans, which is a different tune from before where he made it seem like things would go into motion quickly after we met up. He now makes it seem like he's gonna rent with me for years with lofty maybes on whether he'll eventually get that car or get that money for a home. It doesn't sound like something a grown ass, accountable man would say or expect a woman to be okay with. Guess I'm just supposed to take his word for it, cause now he says "Well you knew this from the beginning.." Gee, did I? It's enough to scare me, since my ex stunted my life in a very real and tangible way with the same attitude–and he's very salty that I compared him to my ex during this exchange, but it's true. Had I been with someone else who hadn't have dragged me down for years, I would likely be living a happier chapter of my life right now.
I don't want this again. I don't want to date another loser who's only going to be with me because I'm a convenient mommy with a car, an okay job, an education, and who can take care of herself. I want a man that's going to boost me for once and give me things, and make me feel special–aside from verbal and written assurances that don't cost men shit to say and ought to be a baseline for any relationship.
It doesn't feel fair. Even my boomer stepdad with plenty of money issues himself still forked out for his new girlfriend and took her on a fancy international vacation, helps her all the time, etc. and that's only within the first months of them dating. No man has ever done that for me.
Meanwhile I can't even get men who are willing to do shit for themselves even if it meant making my life easier by extension.
I looked at myself in the mirror and as I was crying after hanging up the phone tonight, I asked why I was so blind and what the fuck was wrong with me? Obviously I'm a below average chick, but even I know other below average women who have men who drive, bought them houses, and have at least a little ambition. So I asked again, what's wrong with me?
My fucking problem is that I don't pass the second someone throws a red flag. The no car and no plans issue? Women would've stopped talking right then and there, do not pass or collect $200, insta-block. I'm so trained to forgive, and give people the benefit of the doubt, that I fucking believe this horseshit. Maybe because I'm so desperate for support and love deep down, that when a bullshitter comes along and tells me what I want to hear, I want to finally believe that someone would actually consider me special enough to give me those things other women have given to them because I am so. fucking. tired.
He's slated to come here to visit in August and "look at houses" but now I want to tell him no. I feel like texting him asking for some kind of tangible proof that he's going forward with anything he's said he would do, and if he doesn't know how then to figure it out. If not then don't come. He texted me some "I won't do that to you I'll work on everything 100%" when the reality is his word isn't shit to me without proof.
Above all, I need to stop bullshitting myself. I need to start getting comfortable with the fact that I am likely to end up alone. I've had tons of dates but no relationship since I ended shit with my leech ex going on 3 years ago. I'm proud of myself for having standards so as not to get enmeshed again, but it doesn't mean I haven't been had multiple times. I'm going to have to buckle up and deal with my hard ass life that I've struggled to carve out so hard this far. Because I have no support system and clearly even a low bar man isn't gonna do shit for me. I'm going to be fighting tooth and nail for my average little way of life until I fucking can't anymore because I'll never EVER be able to rely on anybody. I know I can do that by myself but I'm so unhappy that I have to.
I wish I could just not exist. It's overwhelming for me and it's too much. I've grown, fought, and worked my way up to my late 20s with the things I've managed to accomplish and for what really? What was the point when I am not happy and other people treat me like a simp?
Edit to mention: the whole reason why this even happened tonight was because I was taking an online personality quiz. The question was what was my biggest flaw? He told me I'm too hard on myself and when he asked his, I said he's unambitious and doesn't seem to have direction. And from there on it was a snowball effect of excuse-making on his part. Bet he wishes he kept his mouth shut now.
No. 567195
File: 1591593584319.jpg (2.09 MB, 2000x1091, 1585859707311.jpg)
My friend's dad died two weeks ago and I didn't even know. I don't use social media and no one told me until now. He had some health issues and was in the hospital, idk if it's related to Covid in some way and don't wanna ask about it. I felt very sad, can't imagine losing your dad at 21. She wished me a happy birthday on Friday. I keep thinking about that and how she must feel. Anons, what should I do? Should I tell her my condolences and be supportive or maybe it's best to not mention it since it's a painful topic and it's been some time already?
No. 567208
>>567194don't listen to that other anon, she sounds jaded af and this is isnt a appearance based issue imo. clearly you don't value yourself enough if you describe yourself as "obviously below average".
you seem like you're so caught up in pleasing others that you don't even understand what you truly want. stop thinking about him for a second and ask yourself if you genuinely believe this person can give you rewarding relationship. and second, you should explicitly tell him what you want (i.e you want him to move out from his parents) and ask him demonstrate to you that hes moving towards those goals. if he doesn't take any action then you need to acknowledge the relationship wouldnt work in the long term and youre just stalling because you don't want to deal with a difficult situation. if he cares about being with you, then he needs to be a man that deserves to be with you, and if he isnt that kind of man now then he needs to become one. i think he himself recognises that the way he is now isnt good enough if he initally tried to hide things from you.
in my opinion, its ridiculous to assume there aren't ANY men out there who have the same attitude and values as you but if you waste time on every guy that isnt as willing to work on the relationship as you are then its going to take you a long ass time to find him.
No. 567212
>>566813I thought about that, but don't autists generally have trouble with communication even when they're highly functional? Aside from being an asshole he is talkative and can hold conversations easily even with strangers. He has a job and never had trouble at school.
So I think he just likes being an asshole, with me in particular.
No. 567219
>>567195I lost my dad at twelve so I can put myself in her shoes.
You can absolutely approach her and say your condolences and that you are thinking of her. Chances are she has heard this a lot already and will not be shocked that you would show that you care. The subject will never stop being painful but the later you offer your condolences the weirder it gets.
(That said she won't ever stop hearing people say they are sorry if she mentions her dad)
No. 567223
>>567195send your condolences, and say you just heard about it if you feel the need to.
i also lost my dad. every time i tell people he'd dead, even 12 years later, they say "oh no i'm so sorry that's so awful you're so strong"…but really i'm most thankful for those who don't make a big deal out of it after the first mention.
try to be natural, compassionate, without reminding her that she's going through something awful you haven't gone through/can't imagine happening to you/etc.
No. 567271
>>567265just put the cupcake down, fatty.
but more seriously, tell your parents that the food isn't the issue. a girl i knew could eat normal-to-big meals to look healthy and normal when going out and puked it all out no matter what.
she needs help, not coaxing, and not a fat older sister whining about muh diet!!! muh fat!!!
No. 567274
File: 1591610826636.png (175.58 KB, 1796x412, my original post.png)
>>567268You're an asshole, quit just assuming things. If I was such a bad sister, I'd just continue with my thing, not giving af whether that influences her badly, but I didn't. Until a short while ago I was the only one in my family who cared at all.
No. 567276
>>567271Kek. could anon's original comment about concern for her sister (which i didn't reply to as i didn't like the way it was written) have come from a place of jealousy? Sounds like the sister might be starting off as skinnyish as opposed to fat like anon and she's furious at her head start, she's been reading ana shit online for so long, time to gatekeep and tell mum and dad
>>567274We saw the original post, we just didn't care. Put the cupcake down fatchan and stop being so pathetic
No. 567282
>>567276Yeah, I'm jealous that my baby sister is killing herself…
If she continues like this, chances are high that she ends up like me, which is the last thing I want. She was fit and popular before, I want her to go back to that, not either becoming a skeleton who needs to get hospitalised or somebody who yoyos and hates herself even more because of that.
Why are you so cruel? Is it so hard to believe that some people really worry for their much younger siblings? Why did so many of you immediately jump on this, using the exact same insults?
No. 567290
>>567254Nah I don't even bother wanting to have interaction with them since its like talking to a brick.
I just looked at the replies of people who called them out.
The hypocrisy is that if it was the opossite and some people were calling a sjw tranny those types of names then everyone would say how wrong and sexist it is but I guess its totally fine for them when its a woman who believes in her biological right.
No. 567292
>>567285some of you bitches sound a bit like ana-chans though lmao.
both can be true: that family is encouraged to be ana by an ana mother who pretends sugar is enough fuel to stay alive and that anon is fat and can't tell her parents to get her some fucking help.
No. 567300
>>567296Lol, stop falling for bait anon.
If you're really concerned for her health and you think she might be developing an ED, try to get her to see a nutricionist or a psychologist.
It's fucking dumb to be asking for advice on lolcow.
No. 567312
>>567306Unfortunately, it seems you can't do much. All EDs, especially anorexia, usually have a psychological component to them and ideally should be treated with professional psychological care.
Hopefully this is just a phase - be open to listening to her problems (if she has any), and try to set an example and be a role model for her.
No. 567313
>>567240sage for blogpost but I had a period of time where I was fed up feeling sorry for myself not having the conventional experiences so "got out there"regardless of how tired it made me, and so long as it's the right company, it can be so educational in a way you're unlikely to be on your own.
For example I'd be friends with people who would teach me how to cook national dishes of theirs, show me cool hiking routes, went mushroom picking with one who could identify the edible ones, took dance classes with another. And when I was in a time of need they stepped up to help me. When I isolated myself one posted an uplifting note through my door.
I mean they're not huge things, and I agree there would be no point if it was just empty socialising at one dull party after another. But I think at least the people I befriended objectively improved my life, and I wish I could've maintained that.
No. 567315
>>566820What the fuck are you sperging about?
Only women have vaginas and are able to menstruate even if all women don't. Calling menstruating people women is 100% scientifically accurate just as calling dogs mammals even if they have a birth defect that renders them unable to lactate. Men can't menstruate and men don't have vaginas. That "s-stop condensing my womahood to my vagina!!!" bullshit placed on the table every time someone states biological facts is laughable. If anything, using "people who menstruate" to address to women is exactly erasing someone's womanhood because they can't menstruate. If you want to be really inclusive you'd have to say "Women who menstruate and women who don't menstruate". Not "people who menstruate".
Even if you can't menstruate you're still a woman. Even if a human was born without hands they'd still be a human, not some new species. That still doesn't mean you can't specify a human having four limbs and opposable thumbs.
No. 567324
>>567322he sounds gross.
>Wonder if he would be ok with me talking shit about short men with mantits who comes in two secondsdo it and tell us about the resulting sperg out.
No. 567332
>>567322>dating a large-breasted manlet who cums in two seconds>being surprised he's a misogynistic retard who wants to bring you downRather than allowing yourself to be humiliated, you
should make that post. Maybe you could even start making references to microdicks for good measure.
He will either get the message and shut the fuck up, or he'll have a little bitch sperg-out at you.
Any result will be in your favor, because if he reacts badly and refuses to apologize for being a dick in the first place, you'll have a guilt-free reason to dump him.
No. 567355
File: 1591620787560.jpg (109.01 KB, 788x1053, Profile_-_Lady_Tremaine.jpg)
Im getting so stressed with dealing with my narc stepmom, she has forbidden me from going to family events when on my mom's side I literally have no relatives anywhere near (mom's an orphan, her sister lives overseas) so i legit just spent christmas and new years eating garlic bread and watching skins alone in my living room, my mom went to visit the family of her deceased ex husband from before i was born, it feels too awkward to go there so i was 100% alone during the holidays.
My dad has to lie and say he's having lunch with his business partner when he takes me out for food, like im a fucking mistress not his daughter, and i think she caught up on it because our going outs had been cut to almost once a month before corona, i haven't seen my grandparents in almost 8 months.
And to top it off, she's stalking my social media, I feel paranoid and unsafe, I feel like I can't post shit on my instagram anymore even if I never did anything even remotely wrong, I don't even post pictures in swimwear, I just know she will try to twist any tiny detail against me.
I can't fucking stand up to the bitch because she's a cop and im not about to confront an unhinged narc with a gun anytime soon.
Fuck you stupid bitch when my dad dies im kicking you out of the house into the streets.
No. 567396
>>567208Thanks for the reply anon. I slept on it so I woke up a bit less frustrated. The thing is I feel I do value myself, and even if my inner voice comes off like I don't, it's just because of the way I've been beat down by other people. It really takes a village, and when one doesn't have supportive family or friends(more than a couple friends flaked me last week which hasn't helped mentally), it's hard for value and self-esteem to keep continually manifesting itself from nothing. When people treat me as no one special it's hard for me to feel special. I know I'm on lolcow, but the reason I downplayed myself and said I'm "below average" is because I feel like every woman still deserves to have stable and responsible men even when they are 'unattractive' so long as they have their shit together or have other things to offer towards the relationship. I see some women who I identify with in very satisfying relationships, and yet there are other women still who settle and go the extra mile to pander and cater to men who don't do shit for them. Is it cause they think they're ugly and couldn't do better? I just want to tell them that they don't have to do that. In fact I think unscrupulous men would purposefully seek out unconventional women with things to offer because they feel they have to throw everything they have at the men while the men can skirt by reciprocating relatively little.
Insofar as him, I don't really trust what he's promising. While I don't care if he lives with mom and dad temporarily, it becomes a pattern when he's told me about past relationships where he's always moved out to be with the girl but when shit doesn't pan out, he's back home. It could have been his mental illness, but do I really want a person with no credit who has never lived with a roommate or by himself?
I explicitly told him I expect him to have a car and that if he's serious about the house, that I'd want one ASAP. Seriously I pay so much in rent right now that a lower house payment would be a huge ease of financial burden on me–not to mention having my own space. He's assured me those things will somehow happen but when I press him he makes excuses ie. "But covid," or "I don't know when the inheritance will come." If these aren't alibis and lies, then he's just being lazy and not doing his research. For example I've looked up when the DMV in his state reopens and it's tentatively the end of June, but I shouldn't have to feed him that info and nag until he does it. He should want it for himself enough to have looked up that info already. He should be able to say "Yeah the DMV opens at the end of the month and once it does I'm gonna be there." I've looked up if law offices and notaries are open in his state and I found out that they are as essential services, so he's likely lying about why that money hasn't come through yet too. I'm doubtful he's telling the truth. Right now he works at a cafe, when I asked him what he did before he moved back home and before covid, he said he was a full-time streamer when he lived with his last girlfriend. Fucking oi!
You see? He can say anything to me if his end game is to keep me on the hook, and once he's moved in with me, it's harder to break up. "Hey babe, money's not coming in yet but it will be soon I pwomise, now let's get an apartment together while we hunt for houses…" I've dated a leech and now I know how lying men operate. He's identical to my ex with the only saving grace that he grooms himself and isn't a manlet. Sure he's nice to me right now and practically worships me, but it's very easy to be that way in an LDR. Again I think being nice and showing interest in a partner is the bare minimum in a relationship and not a high bar, but that could always change if he thinks I'm trapped in the relationship later too.
Honestly you said it best
>He needs to be a man that deserves to be with you, and if he isnt that kind of man now then he needs to become one.I explicitly said on the phone why I was afraid and how I don't want to end up in a situation like with my last ex again, I didn't like how he insisted I should just believe him. I haven't talked to him since I ended the phone call in tears last night. He texted me this morning and said
>You really hurt me last night/this morning. I'm willing to talk about stuff and work it out but I'm not gonna say hey everything is okay.I texted back in what way he was hurt and if he could explain? I didn't yell at him or anything, I was crying because I just don't believe him. He said it was because I compared him to my ex and dismissed him when he gave his excuses. Anyway this is getting too long. This just won't work out, I smell bullshit.
No. 567446
File: 1591631431203.jpg (26.99 KB, 655x454, 93a79f176db757546c47ee31805deb…)
Man, I regret so much right now. Everything is so messy rn and the people around me are psycho.
No. 567472
>>567461Could be. Things change pretty fast: up until 10-15 years ago the trend/woke orthodoxy was that underaged
women could fuck older guys if they wanted and can the uncool moralfags stop being shitlords infantilizing girls and trying to control their bodies, slut shaming, etc. This is where the whole 'they're making an informed choice' stuff came from in the UK grooming gang scandal. This is all flipped 180 degrees once people woke up.
Same thing might happen, especially with the fakeboi transtrenders if enough of them develop some serious buyer's remorse and detransition. Expect 'inquiries into the transition scandal of the late 2010s' and many a lawsuit.
No. 567489
>>567461It's not a trend.
It's time to accept progression in society. It is the new norm.
No. 567520
>>567461It'll end once it becomes really mainstream because normies will absolutely not have it. This morning I saw the most popular normie messaging board in my country discussing JK's tweet and all pro-trans comments had like 999/3 dislike/like ratio and people being sympathetic to her got the opposite. They don't have to worry about the acceptation of the woke progressive crowd or fear for their reputation because they don't care and TRAs know it. You simply can't go up to a normal person and tell them they need to put their kid on horse pills or allow their 12-year old to have her breasts removed. It will never work.
Once the current 18-24 year olds who transitioned in 2016-2018 will regret (my bet's on around 2025-ish) and speak up and something else has become trendy for the 2020's, the movement will gradually dry up. Pseudoscience has short legs and piling lies on top of lies doesn't work, that's why TRAs are so aggressive and
trigger happy. They're well aware that they won't last forever and they'll be done for once the mainstream audience is made to put up with their shit, so they want to rule with fear so to speak as long as they can.
However like I said I don't believe there will be a huge blow up and big scoops about the deep-rooted corruption and snake oil in the trans cult because it's still astroturfed and funded by billionaires, but it'll just go away with time as something else will replace it. The detransitioners who sterilized themselves and mutilated their bodies will be left out for the cold and never have their voice heard as loud as they deserve to.
No. 567630
>>567302better than finding a super cute, totally your type guy close to your same age and having him act totally into you and then just ghosting you suddenly lol.. but the sexual stuff is obviously gross, no woman wants that.
but i relate so hard, i was so fucking excited for this one man and of course nothing even happens.
No. 567713
File: 1591682565229.jpg (309.25 KB, 845x1166, 1589975240193.jpg)
Can't believe I let this guy back into my life. I really thought I was over him but apparently not, so now my heart wants to start simping over this little rodent man again.
But on top of this I'm not sure I'd even want to engage with him given the chance. Since realizing some things about my bisexuality, this may just be me wanting to "win" him. I do find him cute, but typical hetero sex has always been something I've needed to meme myself into even considering.
My emotions are stoopid. I just wanna be pals because he's cool, and yet…
No. 567730
>>567461Why is the only time i hear negative things about FtM when they aren't allowed to compete against men in sport.
Why are 99% of the negative stereotypes MtF?
No. 567770
>>567762I don't think logic and emotion are always polar opposites. For example, if somebody values doing what benefits them, what is useful for them, they will take how something makes them into account because emotions impact your well-being.
Or, if you want to do things for everyone's benefit, you still need to be ok mentally so that you can do things right, and that involves taking care of your emotions among other things.
No. 567818
File: 1591706874786.gif (1.38 MB, 498x463, tenor (5).gif)
I laugh when men who mistreated me or used me back when I was in my late teens/early 20s suddenly want to add me to social media. It's like what's wrong ass faces? You acted like I was a nothing piece of shit then, but now that I'm an attractive woman with my own money and shit together, your broke asses realized you shoulda hung on to what you had? That's too bad, now I definitely won't smash!
>mfw they make fake backup profiles just to attempt to add me knowing I blocked their mains years ago, bonus for pseudo apology groveling
I'm glad I didn't kill myself back then, this was worth it to see them crawl. I made big purchases recently that were public, they must be seething rn.
No. 567819
File: 1591707061265.gif (53.62 KB, 500x376, 1256dc5c6d5894033965868683513d…)
I've slowly come to accept the concept of people not owning me anything so that I don't need to feel sad or abandoned when I don't get the attention I want/need.Not that I even need much attention but sometimes it gets too lonely,even for a lonesome person like me.It's tiring compulsively checking apps and then getting sad there are no replies,but on the other hand,my very few friends are either busy or internet friends at farway places.Placing such a burden on people I will probably ever meet it both taxing to me as to them,as I have gotten upset at times they haven't "been there" for me.I occasionally get the feeling that my oversharing gets overbearing and that these people don't even really care or know how to deal with what I'm saying,even tho I just want to vent and somehow let them learn from my experiences so they won't end up feeling like I used to. I don't really have anything going on for me atm and I honestly don't feel like initiating anything as it all feels hopelesss.Those few interactions that I crave for are the thing closest to what I want to "achieve" but it's not realistic.It makes me feel like whatever bond I have with people is fleeting and that eventually I'll end up alone no matter how things go.Even tho I'm used to being alone,it still makes me kinda sad.
However, realising stuff like this has made me dislike certain personality traits of people less and be less judgemental.Like really,who am I to judge?I'm not a great catch myself and a pretty faulty and inept person.So how can I judge other people's flaws,especially when I probably have similar ones myself?How can I expect others to be there for me when I spend most of my time alone?
The fact that no one really owns me anything is even liberating as I don't place some selfish expectation on someone else and get to have some piece of mind in return.No need to constantly check my replies,or make up scenarios that people hate overly hate me.They are probably neutral to me at worse and have their own problems.Just because they don't really share them like I do,doesn't mean they don't do things.And if they just bullshit and do nothing,why the hell is my business?As if I don't do that.As if they don't have the right to.The fact that I'm comfortable in solitude doesn't mean I'm not afraid of loneliness and maybe I'm scared of it cause that's mostly what I know
No. 567833
File: 1591709967469.jpg (93.04 KB, 930x372, 82e71677931ca5e0e076b6e91c028e…)
i don't know if i love my boyfriend.
but here's the catch: i process feelings differently than everyone else it seems. it often takes me longer to miss someone…like i'll be sad when they leave, get over it, then two months later i'm like "damn they really just moved somewhere else/stopped talking to me" and feel all kinds of nostalgia and sadness. i've never had crushes last longer than a couple of months…i often feel "numb"…
even down to my sexuality…i just can't compare anything i experience to anyone else, especially since i end up over thinking it. i end up wondering if my feelings weren't real, if i've ever felt anything at all, if i'm crazy, if i'm not normal, if i'm not truly feeling what i think i'm feeling…
i just want to live my life.
i haven't gotten the energy to facetime anyone during all of quarantine but asked to facetime him twice in 24 hours without even thinking twice about it, even before that i really missed seeing his face and hearing his voice at the same time, i text him all the time, i imagine myself with him in the future, the smallest things remind me of him…it's only been a few days too, but i'm stressing out cuz apparently i should be in excruciating emotional pain.
but none of this is enough and i keep overthinking everything and feeling like a freak.
it feels like i'm a toy comparing myself to a similar toy but i realize i'm a defective vietnamese bootleg and they're the real thing.
No. 567844
>>567840Whoever would tell you to "just move out" would be missing the bigger picture anyway. Experiencing this level of rejection by family is so viscerally upsetting and (at least in my case) lasts long after someone's moved out. We miss out on that familial support, happy holidays, and other life events that come so easily to other people who are accepted in their families. Many don't realize it's a form of neglect if not emotional abuse in the worst case.
It sounds like you're on the right path though anon, what with having friends. Some of us that come into this life learn all too quickly that blood doesn't get to mean anything. Yet we can still have satisfying 'families,' just ones that we get to choose and make for ourselves. Now that's power.
Not to make your story about myself, I just relate cause if I wasn't blood relation to most of my kin, they would be my bullies, forget about them being my friends. Such is the life of a black sheep.
No. 567846
>>567844 everyones response is to just move out. 'it can't be that bad if you're still there'
and yeah, it totally is a form of emotional neglect. The consequences of which will probably stay with me forever.
No. 567848
>>567833That definitely reads as you having some kind of love for him.
I definitely think that part of your problem is that you're thinking of it in a negative way like that.
Youre not broken. Like you said, you just process differently. That's not a bad thing.
I think accepting that and figuring out how you function emotionally and what it means for you to love someone.
Hope that makes sense lol
Side note: you reminded me of when I was in hospital for a month and my SO told me just about everyday how much he missed me and in what ways. I felt kinda bad that I didn't feel like that on the same level. Definitely missed him, but it didn't make me restless, yknow?
No. 567858
I'm starting to get really depressed about not having any friends, especially female friends. I don't think I'm particularly neurodivergent or anything, I just don't understand anything about how to make and keep a friend. I can't even wrap my mind around what having friends is like or how they interact with each other, I'd be lost on what kinds of topics are normal to chat about or how often to call/text/hang out.
I have a long term bf now (we met via dating app, so it was easy for me to understand how to strike a conversation and how to interact with him) and we just moved in together, it's a very happy and exciting time but I want to cry when I look at our newly combined giant collection of nice dinnerware. I start to fantasize about throwing a big dinner party and making cute desserts for all our friends, but in the daydream I have to fill in my "friends" with blank pretend ones. If we get married, he has a huge extended family and lifelong friends to invite, meanwhile I only have my parents (immigrants, I have limited contact with extended family) and I'd be struggling to fill out a wedding party with the handful of internet friends I have. I worry about this coming off as red flaggy to his friends and family, or that they think I'm just really pathetic. I work with all Boomers so I can't make work friends. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm 25 years old and I've never made even one friend outside of imageboards/tumblr/twitter. Not a single one. I cried writing this dumb bullshit lol
No. 567860
>>567847>>567848thank you anons. i'm also glad to hear you had a similar experience.
i should focus on myself and accept that i have my own process and rhythm…
No. 567861
>>567858get on bumble bff, people look for friends on there.
friends talk about anything. how you once found an actual worm in an apple or your favorite color. you can also show someone a funny animal instagram, if they're into that.
text them whenever you feel, and based on how they respond you adjust. if you send them texts every 5 hours but they check their phone twice a day, you can reduce. if they reply instantly, you can probably keep it up.
sometimes you have to be the one who does the inviting. two of my closest friends barely think about inviting anyone anywhere so i have to ask them to go places with me. they'll spend 3 weeks inside before realizing they haven't eaten out in a while or seen any friends in a while. they don't love me or other people less, they're just like that. don't take it personally and just ask away. "no" doesn't kill anyone.
ask your bf for advice too.
good luck
No. 567877
File: 1591719440456.png (364.85 KB, 702x637, 1588030830526.png)
I'm so ashamed of telling people about my interests. Whenever they ask me what I like doing in my free time, I always end up saying the most boring, normie shit like "listening to music" or "taking a walk" because I'd rather die than tell anyone about what I really enjoy. It's not like I'm some secretive lolicon 34GB file hoarder or some shit, I just enjoy stuff that everyone else does nowadays (among other side hobbies that might seem a tiny bit weird). I couldn't even admit to people that I watch anime without feeling like they are judging me, lol. I've been like this for so many years, always hiding the most irrelevant shit from people out of fear that they will judge me for what I like despite the fact that there are people liking worse things. I know this comes from years of living with an abusive family who shamed and ridiculed me for every single thing that I have done and enjoyed, to the point where I was too ashamed to play with my dolls with other kids when I was their age or going lengths to keep people out of my room because I happened to forget about putting some things away.
All of this makes me so frustrated at myself, because I probably give people the impression that I'm this boring person who probably watches Croatian silent films for a living. I am an interesting person imo, just too much of a coward to ever tell anyone the truth. That's also why my online persona is the complete opposite of me IRL.
No. 567888
File: 1591721655199.jpg (56.95 KB, 800x442, tumblr_33caa6fa2d9060d1ebf32b7…)
I'm so fucking sick of mentally ill people transitioning and pretending that it will solve their problems.
Not sure if people remember but a while ago, i posted about a male friend that was just about to transition, and now he's being called by a different name and pronouns. No blockers, hormones, dress changes or even voice changes. He still has a bass to rival Leonard Cohen. And of course, he always has to bring up how he wants big milky mommy with pp, stripey socks, lingerie, and< of course, how he deperately wishes to become a catgirl - these are basically all his words, not mine, and im sure hes only at least half joking. This is half the shit he talks about now.
I know he has really bad trauma, and I know he just made his fucking dysphoria apparate out of nowhere, but he's so retarded that im sure he just doesn't understand his actual mental state, bc when I asked him
why he wanted to transition he just basically said "I saw girl and said 'I want to be girl'". I honestly dont think he'll cause harm to anyone, I just kind of pity him and hope he'll understand the root of his pain and where it actually comes from. But fuck I swear I don't know if I can go much further without completely losing it and calling him macho ma'am tranny savage one fated day.
>>567885I'm really not an expert obviously, but you could've gained more muscle than weight, or you might be on your period, have a hormone imbalance, or just have a bad day with bloating. If you're considerably overweight it might take time to see progress in the mirror - as for the weight, there could be many factors at play here. Maybe you should eat less than a 300-400 kcal defecit, most people do 500 as a starting point. Best of luck in these trying times, anon!
No. 567891
>>567890maybe look into IF/OMAD? It's a little bit of a meme at this point but when I started fasting after the first week I felt like my hunger subsided drastically, plus if you do OMAD, you dont have to necessarily count calories, just restrict your eating window to 1 hour and fast the rest of the 23, and make sure to not eat too much bad shit. It's honestly the only thing that worked for me, counting calories just made me even more stressed and hungry. Also, don't do IF/OMAD on days you do heavy exercise on, you'll probably faint like i did.
Again, I'm just a dumbass that lost weight and I'm not a nutritionist/dietologist, so take this with a grain of salt.
No. 567903
>>567888an old (male) friend of mine suddenly did this too and I seriously don’t know how to deal with it. he has been sort of mentally unstable for years now for different reasons (heavy psychedelic drug use when still in puberty, traumatic childhood, unhealthy relationships) I don’t see him very often anymore but when I do I try to focus the conversation on more healthy topics like crafting, universal topics and whatever I know he’s interested in, because that shit is one hell of a rabbithole if it appeals to you and I don’t want him to fall much further into it since he’s a very stubborn, sort of simple minded person.
I would like to see and talk to him more often if not for the fact that at one point in the past he was kind of obsessing over me and with the recent transitioning it creeps me tf out wich feels so bad and cowardly.
I really hope this is just another of his impulsive phases like the sort of homophobic phase he had before.
Do you recently feel more emotionally distanced from your friend as well? idk how to deal with this..
No. 567927
>>567903I'm sorry to hear about your situation. He sounds like a mess, and I believe he might be a good person, idk, but he honestly sounds unhealthy to be around. If he's an old friend, and you have been out of touch for long enough that you've just stumbled upon his transitioning, what's preventing you from cutting contact? If you don't want to do that (although you should consider the option), maybe ask him why he's transitioning and when he started feeling dysphoria. See if you can pinpoint why he thought becoming trans would solve whatever problems he has. Trans identifying people are irritatingly sensitive if you ask them about this, so tread w/ caution.
>Do you recently feel more emotionally distanced from your friend as well?Not because of this, no. He's not the brightest bulb in the box, so it's forgivable. He's not a bad person, he's actually very sweet, I just wish he'd accept himself as he is.
No. 567928
File: 1591730764618.jpg (20.42 KB, 600x398, 8f8.jpg)
I am so tired of my explore page on instagram recommending me tiktoks of girls dancing. I don't understand why I'm even being shown that content, never have I even searched for tiktoks let alone tiktoks involving teenagers in bikinis dancing, the fuck? everything else on my explore page is spot on and makes sense considering who I follow (cats, zero waste, vegan shit) so it makes no sense. even after I click 'not interested' on each and every video the algorithm just wont fucking learn and I still get these posts recommended to me. is there anything else I can do short of deleting my account and starting over? as far as I can tell this is no way to block tags or 'reset' the explore page
No. 568011
>>568007I've had a major soda addiction for most of my life. In the last year and a half, I got tested for high cholesterol and was just overweight and gross, and I decided to cut out the soft drinks because that'd probably be one of the best ways to help. I haven't cut them out completely, but I've cut way back from how much I used to drink. I drink water most of the time now, and it's helped me lose weight. My blood pressure has gone down too, and probably my cholesterol some as well, I need to get retested for that.
Every once in a while, I might get that craving for drinking more soda than I've told myself to, but I try to fight it and drink water instead. So far it's been pretty successful I think. Good luck dude.
No. 568013
>>567985Also how huge the audience is for true crime documentaries. Where do they think all the content for their true crime GRWM videos is going to come from when they shut down the police?
Twitter is always petitioning for police to re-investigate this case or that case, but good luck getting the Atlanta child murders solved when the only hot tip anyone will tell cops is "ACAB"
No. 568056
>>568046Her family doesn't seem to mind her posting about her onlyfans so she doesn't seem particularly worried about the social shame aspect of it. She's apparently doing really well on there though, in the top 12% of content creators or whatever she says. Sounds like a manic episode anyway of course.
My best friend used to sell her used panties to get some extra money while she was a student lol. I don't understand why women go to these measures personally but I wouldn't call them retards. I'm just a bit of a prude myself but many women and men these days are hypersexual bunnies clearly not helped by modern society.
No. 568074
File: 1591769617583.jpg (14.21 KB, 250x242, 1531559862361.jpg)
>in a private discord server with people I know irl
>out of 18 users, there are 2 transgender people in it (1 TiM and 1 TiF)
>me and this guy have been having a conversation for hours through text, and somehow the conversation about lgbt pops up and the guy says that he doesn't agree with how transgenderism is being handled
>me and 1 more guy agree
>I realize that the 3 of us have always avoided gendering the 2 trans people and we always use their nicknames instead
>turns out that the TiM went and created his own private server because "he doesn't feel safe around transphobes like me"
>even though the guys were more explicit about their opinions of the movement they still got invited and joined the new server
Funny how that works… And I'm not going to lie, I feel a little bit hurt and confused, as I've always made sure to help everyone out and thought we were on good enough terms that they would think twice about just excluding me from the group.
No. 568090
>>568056>12%Lol anon OF is so saturated that Shayna is 1% and that bitch makes barely above minimum wage
>>568074Ewww trannies and their paper thin skin. Ask those guys to ask her why you weren’t invited.
No. 568091
>>568083I know the feeling, and fall into that trap a lot too. Especially when I see people my age who are pros, or people who are younger than me who are pros.
The good thing about art is, it's not like sports where your "prime" is in your 20s or whatever. You can learn to draw at any age honestly.
No. 568092
>>568074He probably hated you already for being an actual woman, and it probably killed him that he didn't have a reason to shit on you.
The fact that your other friends who claimed to think the same joined his private server, and didn't try to defend you, might mean he told them to bait you into saying how you felt. That, or they're just disloyal.
Overall, shitty people. You aren't the problem here, anon. Take it as good riddance.
No. 568093
>>568083This attitude is so weird to me. So something you enjoy and are interested in isn't worth doing unless you become a top tier pro at it?
I'm not into art but I do a couple of 'early starter' focused sports and you constantly get young adults asking if they can go to the Olympics or be a professional at their age. Like, no you won't be that successful, but neither would the majority of people who started young and why does it matter if you have fun doing it? It's always the brand new beginners or people who haven't even started lessons too, talk about putting the cart before the horse… at least have a go before deciding there's no point in trying.
No. 568102
>>568098parents/siblings are certainly the people who should be there for you no matter what, but don't underestimate how much your friends and extended family care about you.
i think you'll have to slowly learn how to trust again, even if it might take time. 3 years is not a lot of time to heal from abuse.
if something bad happens though: please reach out. don't assume you're alone against the world. don't wait until you're completely broken down to ask for help.
No. 568105
I keep feeling horrible about the fact that I don't have any close IRL or internet friends, especially female ones. It's not like as if I am socially-retarded or anything, but I ended up building trust issues about making new friends after people whom I trusted ended up backstabbing me all along. I haven't made any new friends in more than 6 months now because of me, being busy with job and more that I completely forgot on what having friends or making friends is like. I also moved to a new country to live with my s/o. We both really thought and hoped that I would be good friends with their sister, who ended up being a weird BPD-chan instead. She kept being openly jealous towards me and would throw weird drama fits whenever we come (or she would not show up at all, making mother and grandmother having to make up excuses about her…all the time…). It's really weird how during first few meetings she was acting all cheerful and shit, even though there were sparks of jealousy, but damn, being a such weird 26yo must suck. It's not as if I am some sort of horrible. I am the calmest person IRL who is always ready to help others and I listen to people alot…
My s/o has a few IRL friends, but both him and his friends are really introverted and a-social to a point that they are okay with meeting eachother every once per 1,5 year so I don't think getting to know them would work much. I kept thinking about downloading apps like tinder, but I had a very creepy experience with a stalker from here few years ago.
No. 568112
File: 1591777036485.jpg (53.41 KB, 500x375, 366e818f-450c-4139-9908-6f0694…)
>>568092>>568077>Overall, shitty people. You aren't the problem here, anon. Take it as good riddance.Thank you, I never would have thought that venting and getting these replies would be so cathartic.
>He probably hated you already for being an actual woman, and it probably killed him that he didn't have a reason to shit on you.The weird part is that we used to be friends and later on he confessed to me. I told him that relationships don't suit me, but thanked him for being honest and told him that I'd be more careful about what I say in the future, as to not lead him on. Things were fine for a few months and we got along fine (the TiM started dating another of his kind and I was fully supportive) but now out of nowhere this happens.
There is another woman in our group, but she's one of those INFP types that don't want to cause drama(this sounds like I'm shit-talking her for being meek, but she's actually lovely), so I guess the TiM didn't have a reason to get rid of her.
Sorry for the diary post, but hey, at least now that I don't have to keep up with the group I can focus mostly on myself and my interests, I guess.
No. 568130
>>568120I know, it's just hard to do. I've been through a bunch of withdrawals over 15 years (opiates and benzos) and it now feels like I'm more sensitive to it.
I'm a total zombie unable to do anything and going into panic attacks for the most frivolous shit when I go into withdrawals.
My gp is not qualified to really help ( will only give shit advice and more benzos) and I can't get myself to a psychiatrist, they all are fully book 3 month ahead.
I guess my only option would be to go to ER when I'm in full withdrawals but I really don't want to be held again. That's a really awful option.
I could also just knock myself out for a week (during benzos withdrawals) with a zyprexa box I have lying around, but I'm not even sure it would work.
No. 568155
>>568130woah anon i wasn't sure if this was common, so your GP just kind of throws benzos at you? for how long?
i've been on prescription xan for >10 years (starting when i was a damn kid) but my doctor never told me it was supposed to be used a few months max. legit think i have brain damage or am permanently stunted in some way. is this your experience? nobody talks about this and it's so worrisome
No. 568161
>>568155Yeah, he'll just hand out presprictions like there's no tommorow and not care, I guess.
He's not even the worst, he only gives me one month worth at a time and will make me come in for a blood pressure check and shit (maybe he just wants my consult money idk).
I've been to another practionner when my GP was sick and that guy would give me 3 month worth of pills (3 different prescriptions I could cash out anytime I wanted). This resulted in me having my hands on 90 zolpidem pills at the same time and binging them in like 15 days.
I have some short term memory damage for sure (it gets better when I'm not on benzos but it still feels not like 100% of what it should be).
When I'm on benzos, I will forget name's of people I just fucking met, names of things I use regularly (likle software names) and it will go to the point where I have difficulties expressing myself (I'll just plainly won't be able to recall words I do know, it's not really a memory thing but more a pathway issue I guess?)
No. 568168
>>568161>>568162thanks for sharing your experience friend. that's absolutely wild, my short term memory is shot too. (strangely enough, i'm also on zolpidem. fun how we can be on both when combined they just amplify each other in the worst way)
at this point it's been so long i don't even know how quitting would work, but i found some solidarity in your posts. take care of yourself anon! you're not alone in this weird hellish prescription situation
No. 568171
>>568168Do you get that weird zolpidem high where it feels so good if you don't go to sleep, you can do shit and have conscious conversations but will not remember any of it the next day?
I don't get it from anything else and it's so hard to resist.
No. 568173
File: 1591792035950.jpg (59.87 KB, 662x396, Unarmedroastedlyrebird_f0d294_…)
>>568171anon you're my drug soul sister. yes, and i've admittedly abused it before too. in my experience popping two makes me lazy but 100% content–i can hold conversations but in the past i've admitted really embarrassing stuff without remembering it at all the next day. it probably lowers inhibitions to zero.
i can also admit to using zolpidem when i run out of benzos because you can't be anxious when you're a floaty loosey goosey mess. it's good for a day off, i usually just play video games and make my teammates mad because i'm high and fucking around.
i'm sure from the outside looking in all of this sounds terrible (because it is), but idk. i'm not rough on myself about it, our brains are fuckaroo'd thanks to the docs themselves so we might as well make the best of it.
No. 568176
>>568173Kek, yeah, I have said some embarassing shit on zolpidem too. Like I'm fucking brutal on zolpidem and will tell people to fuck off and why while I'm a no drama anxiety mess sweating over any social interaction in my normal state.
Yeah, I know it sounds like "real" addiction. I'm still able to go month without inbetween tho and will go into withdrawals if I see the end of my meds too early so the doc can't call me on my bullshit for asking meds every 15 days.
It doesn't feel like so addicted you'll go to 15 pharmacy to get your hands on some codeine syrup or like so alcoholic you'll drink some fucking cologne.
Maybe I'm rationalizing and I will be sorry for it later but it never feels that bad.
No. 568191
File: 1591796220943.jpg (262.46 KB, 900x1500, citron tea.jpg)
>>568007I just buy zero calorie seltzers.
My favorite thing to do is to make a yuzu refresher using the seltzer and a spoonful of pic related. It's not as outright terrible as a soda or fruit juice but it satisfies my sweet craving.
No. 568204
File: 1591798290169.jpg (18.76 KB, 400x268, nothingmatters.jpg)
I'm so bitter and hate living in my shitty third world shithole. The government is corrupted to its core, the people here have such narrow minded, judgmental mentality and are super deep into crabs in a bucket culture. Not only that, the cost of living is getting worse every year. I'm fortunate enough to almost reach into the lower-middle income bracket after working for a few years, but I can feel the strain of balancing my budget every month just to live a basic, comfy single life. I feel so sorry for the people in my country who are in the lower income bracket. I don't know how they can survive in this fucked up country, especially those with children.
Tbh, I actually love my country, it's just that the system is so corrupted and rigged that it only favours the rich and those with connections with the upper class. They claim that they apply meritocracy at all levels but it's all a lie. I still remember I had to study my ass off to get into a public university for a degree but failed to get any scholarships even though I did well. Instead, most scholarships were given to the children of the rich and well connected people even though they did not score well. I had a friend who came from a well to do family and his family could definitely afford to send him overseas to continue his Masters study but guess what? He received a full scholarship even though he didn't even score well for his degree just because he is the son of a well known businessman.
Same goes for getting a job in this country. It's a "who you know" game. I see so many talented and intelligent people getting pushed aside or rejected from a high position in the company in favour of selecting someone who has a connection with the boss/manager. The poor work so hard to climb up the ladder but the rich people don't even need a ladder, they've been guaranteed a seat at the top the moment they set foot in the company.
Yes, life is unfair and one must work hard to reach your life dreams and all that shit, but come on! The blatant corruption and hypocrisy of the rich is just too much to take. At least if you want the poor to quit bitching, give us a salary that would at least allow us to live a basic and comfortable life! Most of us don't even want to be super rich. Is it so hard to provide the people with the basic minimum salary to at least afford a house, a car and food without going into serious debt? I don't think I can even buy my own house for years to come without going into serious debt. I can probably afford my own small house maybe in my 50s. I wish I know how to invest in stocks or something. At least I can earn a bit more money to save up for a house or a new car.
Fuck this country! Fuck the rich! Fuck life in general! Reeeeeeeeee
No. 568239
>>568234I've honestly stopped dropping pretense on my feelings about this shit, and all I've gotten were some unfollows and one anon on Tumblr asking me if I "reblog TERF stuff now", which I ignored.
It is fucked up out there for a lot of women though, especially if you have a substantial following, or your account connects to any real life info. I'd say there's quite a few women out there, and maybe some men too, who secretly feel the same way.
No. 568248
>>568239I have a sizable following and I'm involved in fandom stuff and there's a huge pressure on grabbing your pitchfork and joining the mob, even not reblogging constant tranny bullshit gets you branded as a monster even though I've always been clear about being apolitical on my social media. I've been gradually and discreetly cutting ties to all my friends who tweet shit like this but it feels like it's everywhere, I only have a handful of likeminded people I can share my thoughts with no fear of it ever leaking out. It's depressing but I try to remember that it's only the relatively small woke minority who rules over the progressive sphere with an iron fist and the louder they get the more people will realize how out of touch with reality they are. Lockdown has been especially taxing because I'm working remotely and rely on online contacts for socialization so it's easy to forget that majority of the people don't follow the discourse and laugh at this dumb bullshit.
It's just frustrating because it's not like I can reason with them, telling them that maybe saying "terfs should die" is based on misinformation and spoonfed misogyny disguised as progressiveness is to them the equivalent of wearing a swastika on your sleeve. All I can do is to just wait until they peak themselves and realize what a fucked up, male-centric narrative they're supporting.
No. 568251
>>568248Yeah, I like fandom stuff too, but I guess since the main fandom I'm involved in has gotten way smaller, I've just openly started liking gender critical tweets. I won't lie, I'm still hiding that shit in some Discords I'm in though. The other day, one of them went off about JK Rowling being scum, and I just didn't bother saying anything. Like you said, you can't convince these people, this shit is like their religion. You just have to hope that maybe some of them wake up.
Sometimes i wonder if htere's others in those Discords with me who agree with me on these issues. Too bad it's hard to even ask, since so many of them will gleefully throw anyone who goes against the groupthink under the bus.
No. 568275
>>568234I used to think that I could just keep my head down about gender politics and stay out of it but during the #BLM peak so many people posted that they were taking note of people who were silent like it was a threat. If people are really paying that much attention to what other people aren't sharing then silence isn't a safe option for gender critical people anymore.
I support trans rights and put a lot of time into being a good ally but if I don't show it at all times or if make one mistake then the collective trans twitter would literally cheer for my death without a second thought. It scares me how any level of violence against a woman is justified as long as you can call her a terf, and the goalposts of what makes a terf are always moving. It feels like it's only a matter of time until I get branded one and kicked out of my friendship groups just because I haven't reposted enough infographics about violently killing JK Rowling. I hate this violent extremist thinking but there is no way to speak up about it.
No. 568284
>>568275I hardly know any transsexuals. There's like one person that I kinda know due to social circles overlapping and they are very nice and kind. Not loud or annoying. Just wears make-up and nice, feminine clothes. It seems to me that trans "rights" aren't discussed much in the news and nobody is openly for or against anything.
Is the US really
that bad? I see some pictures on FB due to the random American friends I have on there. They seem nice too, although they have a bit "louder" fashion statements etc. I don't feel that news/twitter/tumblr represent what normal life in the US is like…
So that's why I'm wondering.
No. 568288
>>568275What bothers me the most is the way they're absolutely ready to dehumanize living people who
haven't done nothing. My mutuals tweet "If you're a TERF then unfollow me and go fucking die" without a second thought, never taking into account that one of their friends might be silently gendercritical. They're just dropping hate and insults like it was nothing. I doubt they would ever start cussing and screaming in my face if I told them that I don't support TRAs and at that point they'd be forced to realize that someone they see as a normal, good human being has these "evil, literally violent thoughts".
I always wonder if they would actually be willing to sit down and listen to my side of the argument if I was honest about it, but during these times you really can't trust anyone. They're neck deep in the idea that these elusive "TERF" strawmen are middle-aged nasty bible-thumping Karens who they saw berating a minimum wage employee over nothing, I doubt they stop for a second to think that maybe that friendly, fun young person next to them might be fearing for their safety for the same thought crimes they're calling people out for.
No. 568291
>>568275I feel like people who do that stuff are extremely immature and performative, and ignore them accordingly. I never felt persecuted by the "ur silence is complicit!! taking note!!" crowd because when you and your circle are educated, compassionate people everybody already /knows/ who is a good ally, who uplifts poc, who does their homework on complex issues. It's easy to screech on your IG story, much harder to carefully cultivate your worldview from a global-historical perspective and understand that absolutely nothing can be boiled down to a hashtag and repostable infographic. And, y'know, to actually give a shit and do something.
Social media slacktivists are pathetic brainlets who hardly understand any actual worldwide racial/LGBT/political issues beyond "___ is a racist TERF!! cancelled! yas girl hate to see it yall!!!" as if they don't exclusively tweet in botched AAVE while having 100% straight white friends/family
>>568284Most American big cities are fine, especially on the surface. Any area where people are well-educated tends to be more peaceful about racial issues and trans/gay rights because even if they're secretly against something, they know better than to risk pissing someone off. Most of the social problems in America, in my honest opinion, do not rival the issues going on in other countries enough to make international news. Although, police brutality and systemic racism are historically bad and I'm glad it's finally enraging people to this point
No. 568323
>>568317I don't think anybody seriously thinks hiring is based on merit, and I can't make sense of your point in regards to diversity. A lot of people don't have access to the kind of connections you're talking about, and it's not because their parents didn't pull up their bootstraps to become millionaires or whatever. This also means they might not have financial access to higher education or unpaid internships, aka the "merit." Both white and non-white families fall into this hole, so merit and connections are kind of /both/ issues of inequality, and in some cases systemic racism.
Hiring diversely matters because it gives your workforce a sense of comfort and safety knowing someone will understand their concerns and fight for their rights, especially the companies that love to mass-hire minorities and illegal immigrants for cheap labor. In that sense, "diversity hires" might actually be more beneficial to the company than merit or connections hires. I see that a lot in manufacturing
No. 568327
>>568288that is so true and also the reason why i have trouble taking people seriously when they say we are so much less vitriolic and hateful than in the 2000's, be it IRL, with humor in the media or on the internet.
like yeah we made fat/jew/slut jokes that would never fly today but people are literally and openly calling for violence against women on twitter while saying they are feminists and the US is about to be torn apart by a race war, shutting down all dialogue all because people are too self-righteous and entitled to actually lend an ear to whatever the other side is saying.
No. 568397
>>568363>>568365>>568367>>568370well how it got started when I was in hs/college was
>parents ask their friends if they need an intern>i become an internwhich became more internships and eventually my first job when I graduated
>graduate>boss from internship says let’s hire you on ftnow I’m onto my second real job
>family friend says they have a position working under them at their firm that i would love >they send over job description, i chat with them about it, i give them my resume to cover their asses and im hired loljust because it hasn’t happened to you doesn’t mean I’m lying or it’s impossible, it’s not like I’m an idiot - I went to a good school and graduated w honors and have a ton of work experience clearly. I’m always good at what i do even if it’s a position that i would normally not be qualified for without connections. but I don’t feel like a person without these connections would be “climbing the ladder” as fast as I am
depending on the industry you work in the jobs you’re applying to have probably have already been filled by someone who personally knows someone in the c-suite at the company by the time you’re done writing a cover letter. like I said, it definitely helps that my parents are rich and have rich friends who give me these jobs as a favor to them, im sure they want something out of my parents in return
No. 568435
File: 1591834394989.png (442.52 KB, 600x587, bigsad.png)
Just found out that my Dad was on his way to work and was hit head on by a drink driver who was going 120mph
he's been rushed to hospital and is in ICU but I live on the other side of the country and i can't drive (and there's no trains running cross country where i live at the moment due to lockdown)
I have no other family and i'm so scared for him. The police said they're not sure if he'll make it due to his injuries and if he does survive, he'll never be able to walk again as his entire pelvis is shattered.
To make it even worse, the guy who hit him had just got his licence back after running an old man over last year. I'm so angry and upset
No. 568475
>>568288People i used to follow on IG and even supported their brand are suddenly reblogging like 'if you're not for trans rights, allow me and fuck me.'
Like.. what the hell are we normal people supposed to do? It's accepted to be violent against women, as long as they're part of the terf agenda. Like anon said
>>568275 , the goal post is constantly moving
No. 568491
>>568275>b-but I'm a allyYou did it to yourself kek
>>568475If you wouldn't date a person because they're trans or because you're gay you're a transphobe. If you believe in sex as immutable then you're a transphobe. If you don't believe in gender you're a transphobe. If you want women's sports to be for women only you're a transphobe. If you say women menstruate or get pregnant then you're a transphobe. We're coming full circle, even contrapoints has spoken out against non-binary attention seekers not realizing it goes both ways.
No. 568514
>>568512because it means that you grew up and matured as a person
take this as a positive sign anon
No. 568531
File: 1591846370297.png (8.8 KB, 561x263, firefox_2020-06-11_04-29-54.pn…)
>>568234I used to be paranoid about my followers discovering that I was a TERF, but once I got over the fear and posted my thoughts on the subject I realised that I don't really care about what random people online think about me. It's not like they're paying my bills, or contributing to my life whatsoever. So far I've both lost and gained followers over it, as well as received a few anonymous asks about the subject.
I think the fact that I like being anonymous helps, as even after having tumblr/twitter for years I haven't disclosed anything that could help others identify me. Most of my friend group already knows about my stance on this, as well.
No. 568536
>>568457>>568471Gosh, this is the dream. Thanks for pinpointing exactly what I've been craving.
>>568533Honestly… The way they're trying to police my posts should be considered as more worrying
No. 568581
File: 1591855662777.jpg (53.14 KB, 622x610, fuck.jpg)
Accidentally posted this in the confession thread, lol. I can't stop thinking about everything my grandparents went through and how they affected basically the rest of my family memebers' lives. It hurts because there's nothing I can do.
No. 568591
File: 1591857485321.jpeg (33.95 KB, 437x435, F6A2AC04-0734-4733-9A63-135592…)
I can’t feel any emotion that doesn’t come from media like anime/movies/books/etc. I don’t really know how to explain it but real life events, people and such don’t affect me emotionally I think the only “emotions” i’ve felt from events in my life are stress and anxiety but i’ve never really been sad or happy given a reason, like due to an event. I’ll be depressed for no reason or because of a movie or show I watched but If something genuinely sad happens irl I don’t feel anything. Recently a relative passed who I was extremely close to and I didn’t really cry or feel depressed yet I cry over shows and movies all the time. It’s weird how these things are more real to me than actual real life? I genuinely don’t know what’s wrong with me and for a while I thought I was a sociopath but I do feel emotions they just rarely come from events in my actual life.
No. 568604
File: 1591859519987.gif (3.77 MB, 360x302, 6e3fd8dc258a9fa1dc80f08be32178…)
>>568600anon, you're being a mysterious bitch.
No. 568605
File: 1591859767294.gif (1.37 MB, 498x372, grammer.gif)
Sometimes, I feel like as if I am a useless person only because I can't and won't go to university for a few more years, or maybe I won't go to university at all.
The thing is, I moved out of abusive place and all of the universities there req payment and I am working right now just so I could keep paying for house and such… Remembering that all of my friends went to any sort of university as soon as possible, because in our country it's considered that you SHOULD go to a uni asap and such, makes me feel like as if I am a failure, even though I did a great job on life changes. I know that at this rate I won't go to university in the next at least 3 years because I am too busy paying for things, and by that time I will just stop caring about uni in general at all. But it still keeps making me feel like as if it's considered 'bad'.
No. 568614
>>568594I’ll have to look into that anon. I actually hate it, I feel insane a lot of the time and like I can’t empathize with my friends or family and because of this there are a lot of things i’ll never experience. Like for example I don’t really feel any strong emotions or connections to people, I feel more connected to fake characters than to my actual family and friends. Having emotions is great, I think that’s why I surround myself with media 24/7 because it’s the only way I can feel.
>>568596I was diagnosed with manic depression a while back but I don’t feel like that’s correct because I don’t really have manic episodes, so I guess it makes sense this is a sort of side effect.
No. 568678
>>568674My favourite part is how they keep going on about this "radfems repeating the same boring talking points" yet keep making this same tired guilt by association fallacy about how radfems (i.e. anyone who dislikes trannies, fetish porn or camwhores) are totally the same people nitpicking Dakota's nasolabial folds in /snow/.
Anyway shit bait tho
No. 568695
File: 1591875674259.gif (140.61 KB, 220x145, tenor.gif)
>>568683You need to fucking integrate. We're all out there cackling. What's with this kek-anon bs?
No. 568714
>>568701All rise for the kekistani national anthem
>>568707Hell no that’s scary anon
No. 568749
File: 1591885458160.gif (29 KB, 370x207, 949858684.gif)
I'm dating a guy who's eager to try to please and says things like "happy wife, happy life." At first I thought it was pretty simp-ish but you know, I think I've just been brainwashed and normalized to believe that being treated like shit is acceptable so that when a guy is nice and accommodating towards me it feels strange.
No. 568767
>>568734>Losing a family member who you have a strained relationship is a whole new can of worms.This is very true. I used to be close with my grandma, but I eventually wound up going no contact after she did a mix of blaming/not believing me when I talked about my childhood abuse, even though she knew I was telling the truth. It was so difficult to come to terms with when she passed.
I'm sorry for your loss anon. It sounds like you had a nice relationship with her at the end and that's great.
No. 568891
I feel like no one understands the type of social anxiety I have. I don't struggle making eye contact, I don't feel ill when talking to people, I work in an extremely socially charged job. I, however, suck at showing my true personality and feel extremely reserved around people, I second guess everything I say in social situations after the interaction is over, I feel physically ill before going to social gatherings , unless it's someone I'm really close to. I almost never do things alone , and I ruin possible friendships by distancing myself out of fear that they will discover that I'm not interesting or fun to be around. I literally self-sabotage every good thing that comes my way. The few times I ever admit that I feel this way to people, they always laugh and either say that I don't seem socially anxious , or they tell me to "stop overthinking everything".
No. 568899
>>568891>>568894I felt the exact same most of my life. Then I got diagnosed as an Aspie and it's been way easier for me to understand why my mind works the way it does. I was always beating myself up for not being interested in making friends and never invested in interactions with people. I was sure I am just a boring bitch.
This may be stupid advice but maybe read up how autism manifests in women and see if it sounds like you?
No. 568905
>>568903Just like any mental disorder, anxiety is going to have different levels, ranging from mild to severe. Severe might be something like can't leave house without medication to avoid complete emotional shutdown, mild might be something like "I feel a bit sick in my stomach every time I talk to a new person but I push through it."
Looks like Pitt (who I would consider to be a reputable resource) has a webpage on social anxiety and extroversion if you're interested:
http://sova.pitt.edu/educate-yourself-can-you-be-extroverted-and-have-social-anxiety(sorry I'm a bio student and I always try to fact check and find sources haha)
No. 568922
So I made the mistake of moving in with my best friend and his girlfriend, so I'll take the L in advance.
The problem is that their relationship is emotionally abusive to the point that my friend is constantly venting to me about how his mental health is suffering because of her and he has considered breaking up with her. The main reason he already hasn't is because her mental state is so volatile that if he did, she would kill herself. We're all friends but in the last year or so I've inched closer and closer to the edge of my cliff of dealing with her shit.
We're planning a very big trip soon (long, international, super fun, super expensive) and I've expressed my concerns to my best friend about his gf going on this trip. She's terrible with managing money, is prone to "not feeling good," will most assuredly complain about the amount of walking this trip will require, and throws fits and gets girl angry (you know, "what's wrong?", "Nothing I'm fine") when she doesn't get to do the things she wants to (which will definitely happen considering the kind of things she's been sharing with us about what she wants to do on this trip). I admitted to my friend that I actually really don't want her to go because I will not enjoy myself if I have to deal with her the entire time.
I've kind of given up on trying to get my friend to have the balls to talk to his gf about the issues they have, and I've resigned and even given my friend the ultimatum that if his gf doesn't have the money, she won't be going with us on our trip. There is that underlying stomach clench that she'll somehow end up with the money (even considering she already has to ask her mom for help with rent and bills) and I'll be stuck with her complaining and whining for a month.
Sorry this got so long uh, I've been dealing with this escalating since I moved in in February and I can only be so honest with my friend.
No. 568964
kinda sad and pathetic but i love this website and users i honestly feel like you are all my friend and i love u all ive been rejected by girls my whole life for being a gross scary dyke and seeing other women like me with the sameish interests makes me really happy
also
>>568933 anon i hope your dad makes it through , sending you best of wishes n take care
No. 569001
File: 1591933975854.jpg (365.18 KB, 1024x682, istockphoto-547241238-1024x102…)
Genuinely considering going the tradwife route, it feels so depressing to try to fight, stupid xx body always will be weaker, i will aways be in danger, if some fat incel wants to strangle and kill me they can easily do it.
I just want to feel safe, and going for the waiting-until-marriage wheat field fantasy seems like the most concievable hope.
I probably can't have kids so no body destroying pregnancies and having to take care of snotty brats, just chilling, cleaning the house, baking bread, praising jesus, no worries about being harassed at work or on the streets.
No. 569006
>>569003Super illegal where I live, if i carry any weapon around (including any knife thats not a serrated food knife) and get caught im looking at 5 to 10 years, not even using it, if a mean cop just decides to look at my purse and i have a knife choo choo its orange jumpsuit time.
Plus I can easily be overpowered and have my weapon used against me if the man has some sort of self defense training.
Sigh its like every option of living as woman is terrible, I just wish I was born as a man, not even trooning seems like a good idea since their life expectancy is even lower.
No. 569012
>>569001>I probably can't have kids so no body destroying pregnancies and having to take care of snotty brats, just chilling, cleaning the house, baking bread, praising jesus, no worries about being harassed at work or on the streets.Not to be rude but why would a trad guy want a trad wife who can't have kids? It's a fundamental part of the entire concept, and the main reason they would justify paying to let you stay home and bake bread instead of working.
Plus they're assholes and more of a danger to you than some hypothetical fat incel, husbands and partners are the biggest threat to us.
No. 569014
>>569012Its not like I can’t pretend I don’t know im barren, children are not in god’s plans for us yadda yadda work with charities and stuff, most normal non-internet ideology traditional guys are surprisingly fine with not having kids and devoting the household to something else, interacted with mormons enough to know that.
The idea of being single and sexless forever doesn’t sound very appealing either, being a straight woman is shit.
No. 569016
>>569015Lol yeah being murdered by other men.
Read a fucking biology book and some crime statistics before spewing bullshit.
No. 569021
>>569001You're afraid of male violence but believe that becoming a housewife is the best way to avoid it? Sis, domestic violence is the biggest threat to women. Women are more likely to be injured or killed by someone they know than a complete stranger, especially a fat incel. Made worse if you choose to go full trad and then have no purse string power.
Marriage isn't going to prevent creeps from harassing you anyway.
No. 569036
File: 1591941997144.jpeg (87.58 KB, 736x587, F6BC4325-9B5E-420D-A6DF-5727A7…)
I already hate my body shape but this summary of it blows.
No. 569037
File: 1591942591375.jpg (246.11 KB, 1280x720, massive cock.jpg)
>>569001I sometimes get called a tradwife, although it's not something I would identify myself as. I don't go to church or walk around wheat fields in a summer dress. I think it comes from the fact that I'm a housewife that lives on a smallholding. I grow my own fruit and vegetables and keep animals for eggs and milk. It wasn't something I planned on doing, when I was looking for property to buy with my husband, an old abandoned farm house came up at auction so we decided to go for it.
As a lifestyle it's hard work, I'm usually awake at dawn and don't get to rest again until the evening. I'm also aware that it does make me completely dependent on my husband financially. I earn a small amount of money selling eggs and what I grow but it's not enough to support myself. I don't have any regrets though, I'm happier than I've ever been in my life. I never want to go back to being shut in an office for eight hours a day.
If it's what you really want, avoid men actively looking for a tradwife. Instead look for someone who is interested in natural rural living and self sufficiency. My husband isn't trad and has never put any restrictions or expectations on me. I can't imagine making the huge commitment that this takes with someone who didn't see me as an equal partner.
No. 569041
>>569001Bitch so you just wanna be a NEET with financial and physical security, literally nothing inherently trad about that. Just get a nice normie man who likes to provide, maybe the strong silent type.
Self proclaimed trad scrotes are advanced cancer who’s never taken a punch in their damn life but way more likely to beat your ass and cheat on you in true 1940’s gentleman fashion.
No. 569070
File: 1591951849952.jpg (111.06 KB, 886x986, 21.jpg)
>>569046Hourglass figure is overrated, aside from tiny pro-ana models who have been photoshopped to have curves, or the small number of women who manage to be hourglasses under 120 lbs…
I'm an "hourglass" but I weigh a ton and have a huge jean size because my actual bones are super wide. I look giant, I weigh more than most guys I date, and idk man, I wish I was tiny and petite, even if I had to sacrifice the hips and boobs. My waist is small but I still have a chubby stomach below it. To me I look like a cow with big floppy udders.
Pic is not me but similar to my body type. Of course, I have bad self esteem so I still consider her body much prettier than mine.
No. 569090
>>569041based anon. thanks for speaking the truth. tradwaifus community is
toxic as fuck, and 99 of the time most of them are making everything a competition.
No. 569115
File: 1591960827618.jpg (84.49 KB, 443x611, serena4.jpg)
SERENA WILLAMS IS UGLY!!!
she DOES look like a man and i wish dark skinned black women would accept the fucking fact that just becuase She looks like a tranny doesnt mean THEY look like trannies!!!
the fucking idoltry and projection over this dumb, grotesque bitch makes me sick!!!!!
No. 569134
File: 1591963269801.png (89.33 KB, 750x731, 1588096569685.png)
>>569115I am the petty anon coming to inform you I have been crushing on her since I was a kid
No. 569145
>>569128Thank you anon.
I did try it, but sadly any free/peace and quiet time make things worse because I start to think about all the shit that I need to do/fix in my life so I end up just more sad.
No. 569150
File: 1591966678008.jpg (22.55 KB, 474x425, brolicassserena.jpg)
>>569144youre forgetting her steroid face and fucked up hairline
tho i'll be honest, she did look feminine >2008/9, i have no idea what else couldve happened besides juicing
No. 569161
>>568933I'm so sorry anon, I hope he will recover soon.
>>568964That's sweet, sometimes I feel the same. Been here for years now, and even though sometimes there's infighting and all that jazz, I find this userbase unique and there are many nice anons.
t. another scary dyke
No. 569164
>>569115A tranny could never have legs like that, especially not at her level of muscle.
Let women be muscular in peace, anon, ffs.
No. 569166
My dog-walking anxiety is starting to progress the more I hold off on taking my dog. There are loose dogs wherever I go: the parks, my neighborhood, it doesn't fucking matter. And my dog is incredibly reactive to motorcycles, bikes, rollerblades, basically anything that moves besides cars, so sunny days (coupled with his big double coat) are difficult times to walk him. I feel so upset, there's nowhere I can take him. I'm afraid to walk early in the morning/late at night too because of a) loose neighborhood dogs because no one fucking cares, and b) getting fucking attacked by someone or something while we're walking.
I live in a small town and yet it's still ridiculous. A woman just got attacked by a loose dog in town while she was walking her dog. There are pit breeders/fighters dumping their failed fighting pits in and outside of town.
I just want to live on a fucking farm in the middle of nowhere, but then I'd have to deal with coyotes, ughhh fuck
No. 569190
File: 1591977067555.jpg (44.11 KB, 676x676, 1563645908221.jpg)
You know these scenes in hentai or whatever manga or anime where there's a christmas cake/woman over the age of 25 who's depressed, complaining to herself that she has a shitty office lady job and no boyfriend and that she'll die a virgin, while watching tv, eating cup noodles and drinking beer? That's me except I'm ugly as fuck and I'm not even sure I'm gonna get a job. And replace beer with soda.
No. 569217
File: 1591983956845.jpg (13.35 KB, 480x360, hqdefault.jpg)
It's my birthday today, but I got into a huge fight with my mom yesterday. My dad bought me cake today and tried to cheer me up, but my mom didn't even stay for the cake cutting. She never even wished me a happy birthday. It was just me and my dad awkwardly eating cake while my mom was in the other room.
No. 569231
>>569217Happy birthday anon! The unintended gift is realizing you posess more maturity than your mom who is acting like a teenager.
Have your cake and eat it too!
No. 569262
>>569258Damn, that interaction reminded me of my
abusive ex, can't imagine how much worse it is when it's a parent. Hoping you find a way to move out soon, walking on eggshells like that sucks the life out of you.
No. 569336
>>569303WTF?!?! I can't even fathom doing this (I don't have a therapist but)
Honestly I'm mad impressed and kind of in awe. How the fuck did you bring it up?
No. 569359
>>569344You don't have to break up with them, just be "busy" more often and hang out less. You could say you're working on your hobbies (art or music or something) in your spare time and you want to focus on that.
I used to be in a friend group that was catty as hell (constant shittalking each other and gossip) and I hated it, but I worked closely with all of them. I slowly got busier and busier every time they'd invite me somewhere. Just stay cordial and it's all good.
No. 569362
>>569336well he had asked me to keep a journal that he could read later. at first I wasn't even going to tell him, but then I wrote it in my journal. gave him my journal and at our next appointment he said he hadn't read it yet. I kept saying the journal was embarrassing and he kept asking why and eventually I just said "one of the embarrassing things I wrote in there is that I have a crush on you". trust me it was hard to do lol, especially since it was a face chat appointment and I had to see my own face while doing it which makes it worse in my opinion
>>569305I've heard this too, probably why he was unfazed by it
No. 569415
>>569393Tbh I'm a self-proclaimed "positive" person, but it's a coping mechanism for me. My stepmom passed away a few nights ago, while my dad was crying violently, I kept saying stuff like "I'm glad she was at home and not in the hospital," "At least she was asleep and not awake," "I'm glad you guys went on vacation a few months ago." Low-key I'm in denial about the whole thing and I can only hang on by pretending it was somehow a favorable outcome. I only cried for like 1 minute so far because my mind can't comprehend death yet.
But to be fair, I mainly try and act "positive" toward myself and my life. I'd never tell anyone else to stop being sad, or that their own feelings are wrong in any way. When it comes to dealing with others who are feeling sad, imo, the best thing to say is "You're right, it really is awful, and your feelings make sense." I think most people who vent don't want problem-solvers or suggestions, they just want to be heard and understood.
No. 569418
>>569411I think it will take a bit longer, but eventually there is going to be massive backlash directed towards medical practitioners who put children on hormones, carried out surgeries, etc and the industries that encouraged it. The whole thing is legit malpractice, 'do no harm' my ass.
I'd love it if the backlash came about out of sympathy for women and gay people who are getting screwed over by trannies but if anyone cared what they had to say it would never have gotten this big in the first place.
No. 569433
>>569423You need to chill out. You're not the only late bloomer from a high achieving background. I'm 26 and I still haven't graduated from a "good university". I was also sick in college so my GPA is shit, so I'm not sure what kind of job i'll be able to get when i graduate. But you would might drag me for not going to a university that isn't an Ivy. (Though apparently we're ranked higher than Cornell in US News these days) You think being sick would give you some perspective.
I'm taking the comfy pill and probably doing random shit like Peace Corps or Americorps when I graduate. I realize achievements don't really mean that much and no one gives a shit.
No. 569444
File: 1592025099565.jpeg (50.39 KB, 500x382, FD380068-E2B2-412C-8D2A-CE43CD…)
I really don’t give a shit about about radfems, gender crits, or TRAs anymore. Im sick of their retarded ass discourse clogging up my feed all because of the JK Rolling shit. Quarantine is really bringing out all the spergs in full force. Im so over 2020 and the internet in general. I wish I could just say fuck it all, but since Im female and black with a web addiction my retarded ass somehow feels obligated to stay up to date on the mass hysteria and “stay woke”.
No. 569454
>>569433Nah, I don’t judge other people nearly as harshly as I judge myself. My previous school was awful and I still knew a number of people who self-studied their ways into great jobs regardless. I think you sound like an intelligent person with a good idea of what they want.
Honestly, I feel like the dating thing is probably what stresses me out the most, lmao. I tend to attract guys from the same field as me, except they have so much more experience to talk about and are completely chilling with their salaries. A (shitty ex-)friend once told me that nobody like that would ever view me as more than a “college girl hookup” or take me seriously, and that just hurt even more.
No. 569459
>>569444Are you me? Only I quit caring a long time ago. Looking at social media feels like being dragged across a sea of marbles. Not painful but extremely uncomfortable and gives the desire of just wanting it to end.
I think everyone just abandoned pretenses of staying 'woke' and now think that it means being angry at everything all of the time. I barely use twitter anymore, and I don't want to use it for that reason.
No. 569464
Was anyone (for a lack of a better word) e-groomed by a pedophile?
When I was ages 12-14 or so, I was in an online "relationship" with an adult man I met through a popular video game. At first he groomed me into chatty skype calls, then eventually sexy poses, getting undressed, and finally at some point, full nudity. This went on for like a year and a half. He was in another country but he probably would have convinced me to meet up for sex if we were in the same place.
A few years ago, as an older teenager, I reached out to a child protection agency in his country, who tried to help me. They contacted the USA police, but the police rejected my case for some reason. The people at the agency tried to tell me to go to the cops myself, but I decided against it. I am deathly terrified of cops after some incidents with them in the past, I don't believe they would be tactful with a case like this at all.
I wish I could do something, but I don't think I actually can. I don't think the police will care about a cyber-pedo in another country whose interaction with me was years ago. They'd have to get a subpoena from skype or whatever. I look him up sometimes and he's working at a hospital now, it really upsets me.
Makes me feel sad and angry to think there might be child porn of me, floating out on the internet somewhere, had he decided to screenshot it and upload it. Fuck pedophiles who act on their urges.
No. 569465
>>569444>>569459I don't even use social media anymore but all this shit about "if you're silent you're complicit" and hundreds of people trying to cancel someone for being
too quiet makes me so tired lol. Like what the fuck do you want me and my 12 followers to do? What is posting a black image, when I don't post the other 364 days out of the year, going to do?
No. 569478
>>569465Not to powerlevel, but I volunteer quite a bit in real life, including places that often help black families, like homeless shelters.
Even so, I refuse to repost anything on social media. Why? It's stupid, it's lazy, it's just clogging up everyone's feed, it lets people pat themselves on the back without taking real action. Hell, I barely social media, I maybe post a photo once every 2 or 3 months.
The other day someone posted like 12 insta stories in a row with tiny font about BLM. I clicked through it quickly and at the end it said something like, "If you didn't read the past pages, you're part of the problem." Well fuck, if I wanna be educated, I'm going to read a book or a vetted news journal, not squint my eyes at someone's tiny insta story that only stays on the screen 5 seconds so I have to back click constantly.
Of course, I'm the yt demon for not taking 10 seconds to repost, even though I've volunteered hundreds of hours irl, right? Or maybe I should start posting photos of me volunteering to be a performative ally just like everyone else?
No. 569493
>>569484Agreed. I was playing Jackbox with my friends and one of the prompts had to do with cops and naturally it went down the “No cops are good ACAB” road bullshit. Which annoyed the hell out of me and killed my mood. It doesn’t help that those two friends have acted cringy in terms of being woke or have just said some stuff that could be interpreted as racist or at least racially insensitive (I mean, I have to but I admit it my wrongs and I don’t try to act woke to compensate for it). Also I was violently attacked last year in an attempted mugging on my birthday and this time around, the cops actually really helped me out with my ordeal and were really kind towards me. I still do agree that the police force is a magnet for really aggressive men who use it to treat POC terribly (and that’s if they’re lucky) and the entire system needs a rehaul. I guess I’m a bad person for not thinking every single cop out there is a piece of shit.
Also while I do think SM is a good tool for spreading the word, some people really think it’s the ONLY way to promote activism. A few days ago, I saw people spamming an official Animal Crossing Twitter account because they didn’t say anything about BLM (even though Nintendo American released a statement in solidarity with BLM). Really, it’s just a contest on who can be the most self righteous.
No. 569506
File: 1592035264630.jpeg (31.21 KB, 338x324, D29C9594-1B0F-4E16-BEDB-7BAF13…)
>>569498Tbh I do this too. Other women seem so much more put together so I guess I’m trying to figure out their secret or something?
No. 569515
>>569514Maybe this is wishful thinking, but I think the mirror is more reliable.
Photography squishes a 3D person into a 2D plane, which isn't always the best way to portray someone. I especially believe this is the case if you have softer features (round face, chubby cheeks, lighter eyebrows) because it squishes them into oblivion, whereas people with sharp features (intense cheekbones, strong jaw, dark eyebrows) are going to look better squished into a 2D plane. If you think about it, most models have really intense facial features, right?
I've hella thought of this because I often feel bad over it myself lol. I've come to realize soft round features like mine just aren't done justice on a camera. I look much better on video.
No. 569530
>>569484If you were my friend, I would've stayed following you because it's exhausting how performative these people are. You'd be a breath of fresh air. I've literally hid retweets from all my extremely woke mutuals because it's the same 3 links and petitions being shared and people trying to be "educational" to their thought bubble that is composed of 35 active users patting each other on the back for sharing virtually anything that
sounds "right" or edgy enough. Literally all these people are exaggerating how they're doing good for ~the community~. These are the same people who only have 5 non-white friends/aquaintances and probably only follow 5 black people tops. Like, they need to realize they're just preaching to the choir.
A bit OT but I saw someone retweet a thread composed of bands with black members and it just felt completely… I don't know the right word, but it felt very ignorant. I listen to a variety of genres and I was honestly amazed people aren't aware who Death Grips or Killswitch Engage are, or at least seen their names thrown around. If you want diverse music, literally just listen to early house music. Early any genre, it's not very hard to find diversity in the world of music, but some people really need their hand held.
No. 569534
>>569484I live in a country that was recently applauded for its strict monitoring and world-class education for policemen (including extensive psychological tests) yet I still had mutuals posting "ACAB" stuff just because some drunkards and junkies have died in the slammer due to themselves OD'ing and this is somehow a proof of "police brutality". Unfollowed everyone who posted this shit because they couldn't appreciate the fact that our policemen are always respectful and go through a vigorous training that makes sure no psycho narc is given a gun and a badge to carry around.
The ironic thing is that these people are the first ones to go file a police report for any sort of thought crime they manage to spot on social media after finishing their speech on how the Police institute should be abolished.
>>569478God this pisses me off. These slacktivists just post text walls on their social media, from their cozy homes without ever volunteering to make the world a better place, and then pat themselves on the back for being such a good, virtuous ally. Bonus points if they tag their Patreon/Ko-Fi/Paypal for people to donate to instead of linking charities or organizations.
No. 569544
File: 1592044021676.jpeg (179.11 KB, 496x617, 9CF73CE2-5742-4DCD-A126-6C9ADC…)
I live in a town full of native americans, they’re so uppity when white people are fascinated with their ~culture~. some of them get mad when non-native people say “spirit animal” or have dream catchers . Why are they so rabid? I remember a girl posting these old white people passing through the middle of town and they were sitting down watching a rain dance and someone posted it on social media and was like “NO THIS JSNT FOR YOU WHITE PEOPLE YOU STOLE OUR LAND STOP TRYING TO STEAL OUR CULTURE REEEE”
No. 569551
File: 1592047152903.jpg (359 KB, 1080x1350, NINTCHDBPICT000495669536.jpg)
My friend keeps asking me the dumbest questions, she is studying maths; the other day she asked me what's the natural logarithm of minus infinity.
I'm glad I'm around to help her but what when I won't be around? She's smart but it's as if she has no desire to find out answers on her own. I don't know how to help her. I tell her to google it but she doesn't know english and the resources in our language are limited.
Also this cat looks like a powerful khajiit.
No. 569567
File: 1592052099632.jpg (44.26 KB, 1280x720, maxresdefault (1).jpg)
I hooked up with a girl from an app about 2 weeks ago and she will not stop messaging me and says I 'used her' and talking about her depression. How do I tell her that that's just how the app works? I haven't spoken to her since that night
No. 569577
File: 1592054216127.jpg (100.96 KB, 716x688, 43997951_p0_master1200.jpg)
Anyone having a problem with friends not showing any initiative in arranging shit?
Like it is up to me to arrange social interactions every. single. time. if not they will not do anything for weeks. We used to do a discord stream together where one of us would stream a movie and we would just hang out and comment on it. It was fun but it was down to me to arrange it all. I would have to message the group chat and it would go like:
>I message the chat asking if anyone wants to watch a movie this week
>Everyone reads the message, I get a single answer: 'Ok'
>I ask when people are free.
>Everyone reads the message. No one answers except single friend that answered before: 'Saturday'
>I ask if Saturday evening is alright with everyone.
>Chat is deathly silent. I am basically speaking into the fucking void.
>I decide to just fucking leave it at that.
>Saturday evening I log into discord.
>Everyone is in.
>Movie night commences as normal.
Disgruntled, I decided to not arrange anything at all. It has been four weeks and no one's said anything.
Actually typing this I realized that its probably because they dont want to hang out at all. They probably just talk in between themselves now. Man I am an idiot. This always happens with all my friends, maybe I am just not calibrated for friendship.
Like I had this entire rant planned but now I just feel like shit for putting any effort in with these people. I am going to start bird-watching or something. It feels pretty bad.
No. 569581
>>569580>she has my phone number Huh? Is your English just bad and this is what you meant by "how the app works"? Because you made it sound like hooking up casually is "how the app works" and I was interested in which you were referencing.
>you're being a dickhead I mean I don't have a girl angry at me because I didn't make it clear I wasn't hurting for a relationship beforehand so…
No. 569588
File: 1592056460102.jpg (38.42 KB, 720x491, 3edz2b.jpg)
Friend canceled her wedding that I was part in due to covid, buuuuut she's not gonna go through with getting married on the planned date so she's rescheduling.
Her and the guy have been together for like almost a decade so the fact that they even want a ceremony at this point is entertaining to me. Not gonna get out of paying for that $300 ugly bridesmaid outfit am I?
No. 569601
>>569598No one's angry that you used an app, you're just a fucking idiot eslchan who hasn't figured out what a block function is and acting like a
victim when you're not one.
>how was I to know she was unwell I only have her my number, my address, and then fucker her at my house before getting to know her!Yeah don't call anyone else here tards, kek.
No. 569604
File: 1592058491615.png (413.31 KB, 600x525, une kektastrophe.png)
ITT BPDchans that got fucked and chucked
No. 569610
>>569606Why can't you handle that it wasn't my fault that some psycho bitches attached to me? I unmatched her and I blocked her number, happy now?
>>569599Yes, it was very obvious I'm not looking for relationship
No. 569697
>>569505>>569464Any decent person will feel disgust. You can't change the world but you can change who you surround yourself with. If these things ever happen to come back to you in any way, your friends should be there to support you (if not there's probably a lot of girls here who will have your back).
Don't let that noise get to you. Lots of hugs to both of you.
No. 569709
>>569006>i wish i was a born a manShut the fuck up and do something about it then. Women are the superior sex and just doesnt we have shit laws right now doesnt mean we cant change them. That's what a lot of women have done in the past.
>>569075Good for you, anon! That was me last night when i was working until 10pm. I'm off today and enjoying life
No. 569774
>>569714Lol millennials leaving their 20s are the worst peak levels of woke, as they stop being entertaining by mindless vice-era apathetic edgy consumerism,
politics is the only thing left. I’m fucking scared what millennials will look like in ten years. I have genx friends who are already a nightmare of bitterness, personal regret expressed as hostility, and resentment towards the younger generations for “ruining” the world thru technology. They glorifying their completely underwhelming youth of checking out, sitting on a dingey couch for 12 years reading ghost world while getting high as “the last time people were real, man”. Millennials at their worst are genx’s low impact semi-parasitism, mindless consumerism of ironic edginess as a product and hostility towards anyone with direction in life PLUS a extreme level of self-righteous woke moralization. Genx has way more in common with the millennials that they claim to despise then they care to admit which I find hilarious.
No. 569789
>>569774Being in between those two generations and not adhering to this performative fake woke shit is basically like a social death sentence. Everyone around me is mindlessly consuming this twitter sjw virute-signalling crap and spreading it everywhere, making sure to get all those woke points.
I'm so tired of all these brain-dead, rabid bandwagon idiots.
Twitter specifically has managed to become a haven for the most sheltered, narcissistic, entitled and hypocritical freaks out there, and you either agree with them on
everything or you're an evil bigot.
No. 569813
>>569714>>569774I noticed the same, people in their late 20s or 30s actually tend to be a lot worse than the younger crowd who usually get's shat on for being "woke". In uni too, it's always older students (the ones who studied for way too long already) who are the most performative and annoying, always trying to get everybody to join their "fight" against meat eaters, nazis, the capitalism, and so on… Once had to leave a discord group because this "poc" transman in her early/mid 30s just wouldn't stop lecturing me about every topic imaginable. Sometimes I check her and her friends twitter and it's a trainwreck, like lady you're married and supposedly working, why or how do you spend so much time online posting 24/7 about how awful absolutely everything in this world is? Living like this must be so exhausting, they're constantly purposely surrounding themselves with things that
trigger them. But I'm not gonna feel sorry for them either, because they're so eager to accuse much younger (esl) people of random shit, solely to make themselves feel superior. That's actually a stereotypically american mindset, they're not so different from the people they're fighting against lol
No. 569843
File: 1592093845873.jpg (54.93 KB, 1200x659, ERLQtz-UUAA4QVJ.jpg)
i wish 4chan faggots would go one day without mentioning lc jesus fucking christ, why are they so obsessed with us supposed femcels ??? it fills me with rage when another faggot inevitably replies "whats that ?" acting utterly shocked that there are women on the internet, so they HAVE to come lurk and get triggered
FUCK MOIDS KILL YOURSELVES
No. 569880
>>569001>always be weakerIf in the US, acquire gun, get training. There's a lot of female-oriented self-defense orgs that run it.
Best case scenario - you get a cool hobby out of it, and maybe meet some trad-wife looking bearded flannel wearing men who'll take you on awesome dates.
No. 569946
>>569642i think everyone has a degree of quarantine induced ennui at the moment. That's probably part of it. I know I'm spending more time here than I was so it seems slower but I suspect it hasn't actually changed much.
>>569848Sorry you have to deal with her bullshit anon. I'm guessing you already know about the grey rock method but just straight up not talking to my crazy dad at all has honestly really helped me.
>>569908That's literally the worst thing you can do with these people. They feel even more victimized and it gives them an excuse to chimp out even more. Not engaging has been the only thing I've tried that has worked.
>>569916Breaking her shit in retaliation is also a form of reasoning, just not with words.
No. 569954
>>569923>since I haven't noticed shit about the bathrooms Of course you haven't, bitching about bathrooms is TRUE transphobia. There is no epidemic of trannies molesting women in bathrooms, it's just women overreacting to an imaginary fear in their heads.
Being gender critical is perfectly rational, believing in biological sex is perfectly rational, but bathroom rants cross the line into irrational fear - a phobia.
No. 569964
>>569954NTA but I recently read this study that basically blows that "hysterical women imagining everything" theory out of the water lmao
https://womanmeanssomething.com/targetstudy/tl;dr: Gender-inclusive policies for bathrooms in Target stores have shown a significant increase in sexual harassment cases. Also, all the perpetrators are biologically male.
No. 569971
>>569963Fuck this. Ideologists of any kind always pick isolated incidents that serve their point. Worthless links.
>>569964THIS is good data that can change my mind on the subject. A full research done on a proper sample. Valuable link, thank you.
No. 569973
>>569971Yeah, factual things happening to real women is worthless, right?
Kek.
No. 569984
>>569973You know that's not what I meant, and I'm sorry my reply to you was so abrasive.
Its just that I'm tired of people posting single incidents as proof of something. For example, I have seen the same exact video posted as proof that X ethnicity is violent, but each time a completely different ethnicity (different continents even), same video, circulates around for years… and the Interent is flooded with such "examples".
I hope you understand my frustration and I'm sorry I took it out on you.
No. 569987
>>569984But the thing is, they are not isolated incidents. And even if it's not even "true trangender people" who do it (and I'm being generous here), men will abuse the fact that women bathrooms are now a free for all.
Bathrooms are secluded places where you go alone. If someone push you in a stall and cover your mouth, you can be raped/molested even in a public place.
There's a fucking reason women/men bathroom are segregated in the first place. For the safety of women because people noticed early on that women were abused if you let men in those spaces.
It's crazy making to me we're letting transwomen, who grew up as males and all the
toxic entitlement that go with it + still the agression that goes with hormones/male brains and any male ready to claim themselves as trans in bathrooms where women are at high risk of being abused.
No. 570001
File: 1592119498541.jpg (40.64 KB, 635x665, 1575334417138.jpg)
>man hating radfems leave
>tranny loving libfems appear
I preferred the radfems tbh
No. 570048
>>569946Thanks anon, shitty parents are the worst, it’s really awful when you try and tell people what they’re like and they don’t fully understand that it can be unbearable at points. My mum has moved out actually, albeit temporarily, she’ll probably come back but for now she’s got a suit case full of her stuff.
I’m really nervous because I’ve wanted her to leave for a while but now that it’s actually somewhat happening I’m scared for what’s ahead. My dads a really great guy as is my brother so we’ll make something work, I’m just worried. My mums the type of person who would commit suicide not as a last resort or out of sadness but to spite us.
No. 570125
>>570106Have you consulted a gynecologist about this issue? You could get a prescription for an antibiotic there, I had a pretty bad BV and got it cured with metronidazole and probiotics. I took this:
https://de.iherb.com/pr/renew-life-women-s-vaginal-ultimate-flora-probiotic-50-billion-live-cultures-30-vegetable-capsules/13115 It helped many women with BV. I know that it sucks and that curing it is a lot of trial and error, but it is possible and worth it. Keep in mind that treating BV with antibiotics messes with your body and usually goes hand in hand with a yeast infection, but those are easy to deal with and not half as bad as BV. Good luck!
No. 570136
File: 1592136631182.jpeg (81.49 KB, 933x915, 22828.jpeg)
i have avoidant attachment and am trying my best to work on it (shoutout to my therapist), but it's so hard. i sometimes want to give up.
while i have a handful of close friends (most online though) and some of acquaintances, i still feel very lonely. i have never had a bf or been sexual with a guy because i don't feel comfortable getting that close to someone i like. i'm 25 and somewhat embarrassed/ashamed of this, but because i'm attractive most people assume i have been in a relationship (lmao) so it's not even an issue?
i wish i could take my brain out and rewire it. i want to feel close to others so badly, but it's such a terrifying concept and just thinking about it makes me anxious. i feel like i know so many cool people online, but struggle to find common ground with people who i meet irl. maybe it's because i have the guts to be more open about myself and my interests to people i talk with on the internet? who knows, but i wish things were different.
No. 570141
File: 1592137779109.jpeg (81.84 KB, 933x891, 1591215845326.jpeg)
>>570140
No. 570142
File: 1592138137970.png (147.46 KB, 715x719, etwyw4y4w.PNG)
>>566277I just read this, oh my god i am going to die. I've been starving myself and binging bad while drinking a shit ton of coffee for the last year. Today i drank so much coffe my heart is hurting so bad i fucked up i'm going to die i don't know what to do i have no one
the title of the post is
"Im barely 21 and Im going to die of heart failure soon. Ive only really had disordered eating on and off for less than two years and have a normal BMI, and yet I'll be extremely lucky to live for even five more years. I felt 100% fine until well after Id irreparably damaged my heart. Get. Help. Now."
No. 570148
File: 1592140870763.png (209.92 KB, 636x519, BIG WIZ.png)
It's getting kind of upsetting being called a guy/told I'm pretending to be a woman online all the time. Not even just hi scrote on here, like even on fucking Reddit. Why am I terminally malebrained?
No. 570178
>>570160Why not both sis? Regardless of who you let into your life, those individuals still made the decision to take you for granted and treat you like shit.
I swear it's only women who are so hard on ourselves and blame ourselves for the bullshit other people put us through.
No. 570197
Sometimes I think it would be nice if my best friend could give me support without judging every single little thing I do, say or think. Since I can remember she always made me feel unsure about my decisions because she criticised everything, starting from my boyfriends, my new friends, my hairstyle, the jobs I’ve had from time to time, to insignificant things like what I choose to eat or they way I’m exercising. And I know she’s just jealous because she’s truly an insecure person who has to make everything about her but In don’t know…
I always support her, even when she’s doing things that I wouldn’t do, because I try to put myself in her shoes. She never did that, and by never I mean never.
She’s always questioning me and I love her, I love her too much considering she doesn’t deserve it and I can’t understand why she can say something nice to me for once without adding snarky remarks just because.
No. 570212
My OCD is acting up and it's the most fustrating thing ever. It's so draining constantly being afraid of catching some fatal virus or disease, and feeling like I can't do anything about it but clean everything. It doesn't even matter how hard I try to ignore my intrusive thoughts, because they just keep coming back.
>>570202Can't she at least get a tour guide? Or even somehow find another Indian woman to hike with her? There has to be some kinda website or program to find people from other countries to hang out with.
Obviously every country has crime, but India has an awful sexual assault rate. I can't imagine some sicko there would be to worried raping about a foreign woman. Maybe you can show her some statistics to convince her to take someone with her.
No. 570239
File: 1592154131859.jpeg (338.51 KB, 903x1396, 05B3C125-9179-4611-A94F-EFDF49…)
I wish there was a female lifting forum or thread. 4chan’s /fit/ just doesn’t do it, and I’d love to talk about fitness with other women. The fitness thread we have just doesn’t do it since it’s mostly just losing weight and being a beginner.
No. 570253
it pisses me off that people, particularly Americans, are just eating up obvious media bullshit and propaganda about the BLM protests. these same people, and even farmers, were the same ones a few months ago praising HK protesters for going against their oppressive government, simply because the US news portrayed HK protesters in a way that would make you sympathize as such.
just using a VPN and looking at news from other countries and the way they're reporting the movement, the tone is extremely different. we're being seen as a joke, as a country in nationwide civil unrest over widespread police brutality and injustice, only to be met with more brutality. even an Australian reporter was brutalized by police for reporting on the streets. so if the US seems to be the only one churning out propaganda, trying to shut down protesters, isn't it just a little bit tone deaf to believe that shit?
when in HK, the government and local news talks about those protesters in the same way the US is talking about it's peaceful protesters now, "violent, rioters, looters, thieves, etc.". it's almost as if whatever country you're in is going to show you the propaganda and message they want you to believe.
I've been to the protests in my city since they started, and the actions of the crowds have been peaceful. Yet everyday since there's been dozens upon dozens of photos and videos released showing my local police force brutalizing, pepper spraying, tazing, shooting rubber bullets, and arresting peaceful protesters, even going as far as to lie on social media about it. (they arrested a local travelling hippie bus for 'passing out riot equipment' when it was their kids knee pads for soccer). I've been on the streets myself and witnessed the brutality, even being pepper sprayed myself for being in one of the crowds peacefully chanting on the sidewalk.
and it's so obvious that the ones falling for the "these are violent riots, support police" narrative have been locked inside since the protests started, or only get their info from local police Facebook pages because even the local news livestreams showcase the way they're even treating peaceful reporters (with pepper spray and tear gas).
the fucking US government dropped bombs on a black community in Tulsa, and y'all think this isn't a larger issue than it is? or that riots weren't justified? look at the historical timeline of events. this has been happening over and over again since the 1900s and will continue to until actual change is made. periodt.
No. 570257
File: 1592155855020.jpg (1.33 MB, 3024x4032, 1589988775938.jpg)
My mother is such a Karen, I can't take it anymore. She always has been like that, but it got 1000% worse after she got her dog.
No. 570266
>>570253It's fucked up how much propaganda seems to work on people, it's like they're emotionally invested in believing whatever narrative helps keep the status quo.
On the bright side, the protests seem to have made a positive change and opened a conversation on police. Just tune out the ignorant people, anon. They're dedicated to not changing.
No. 570276
File: 1592157486557.gif (338.51 KB, 220x220, d159cb4d-2381-4bca-8ea0-d33204…)
someone described my oral sex skills and nutting on my face as "epic" today, should I end it?
No. 570278
>>570266>the protests seem to have made a positive changeTrump getting elected in 2020 is a positive change?
Nothing good is going to come out of this. I can't believe how hard these people have been played. Woke leftists types might think that burning homes and businesses to the ground is a good thing but everyone else thinks it's abhorrent.
No. 570306
File: 1592160536750.jpg (99.87 KB, 1242x835, 38209649_289344941821075_29560…)
Is there anything I can do to help me cope my with my height? I have a very twinky face&body but am also 6'2 and I just cannot approach any guy I am interested in cause I am afraid he will laugh at what a weird abomination I am. Worse still, I have terrible anxiety from going outside cause I am afraid random strangers low-key laugh at how bizzare I look. I started hunching to "reduce" my height a lil but no shit that makes me look even more bizzare. Is there anything I can do to cope besides going to a therapist? Cause I cannot do that right now because reasons. t. gay male(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)
No. 570393
>>570289So when's that prefrontal cortex of yours going to develop? I'm half expecting your retarded ass to quote a murder statistic next
>>570253Lmao you already know why they have a problem with talking about police brutality.
No. 570398
>>570385Anon telling someone off may feel good in the moment but yeah, 9 times outta 10 the person you're telling off spins it as if they're a
victim and you're the bully regardless of what behavior
triggered you to do the confrontation. Take it as a lesson in gracefully distancing yourself from people you don't want to associate with anymore. Sounds like if your group is stanning for her, then you need to find new friends who actually agree with you in general.
Honestly besides her being weirdly competitive about her shitty japanese with you, the rest wasn't really your business and it doesn't sound like she wronged you in any other kind of personal way.
No. 570433
>>570426You definitely can intuitively eat, but just not in the way you're thinking. What you do is just eat the same thing on rotation, that way you already know how much calories each meal has.
I always get the same lunch everyday from the deli for example. I already know how much cals it has and don't have to do any counting.
No. 570442
>>570434It sounds more like she was using the silent treatment rather than being mute (unable to speak). But yes, that is typical passive aggressive abuser shit and happened to me as well. It's normal to not always know how to express yourself when you've been given poor examples of communication.
Sometimes I find myself repeating the same abuser patterns that I grew up with to other people. It helps to say upfront "I need space and time to think, I don't want to talk right now" so you can sort out your feelings internally and not go full silent treatment.
No. 570464
>>570266>positive changeI'm going to say this isn't the case overall. A lot of movements are now getting started that have nothing to do with police brutality, the original intent has been hijacked.
>>570253The protests themselves are not a bad thing, but with every major media frenzy: There are people trying to capitalize on it. The worst parts of any movement are always used to define the entire movement, it's not an isolated thing; this has been the case since print newspapers first started.
No. 570482
File: 1592189720799.png (393.08 KB, 500x491, A9E0D485-552A-401D-B75C-A80122…)
My online friend from America keeps acting so fucking shocked when she finds out that we also have the same brand of cereal, snacks, etc. or the same stores here in Europe. The country I live in isn't even poor, we are very rich and I told her this several times. At first I thought the way she got all curious and shocked when she found out that we also have the same thing here was very cute of her, but now it's becoming so fucking annoying aka the most recent thing was her literally believing that we don't have any macaroni here and it's only an America/UK/Canada thing. HELLO?
This woman is 20+ but behaves like a little child sometimes, I swear.
I don't have the heart to tell her it's annoying because despite all of this I love her dearly and think she's a very endearing person, but man… this is something.
No. 570489
>>570472do you think you could reach back out to old friends who would understand you were in an
abusive relationship?
No. 570494
File: 1592192754628.jpg (32.55 KB, 650x376, 16o82u.jpg)
I feel like I really dropped the ball in not picking a nice and stable partner in my mid-20s. Now that I'm 28 basically every man my age and slightly older are just…maladjusted and have nothing to offer me. Granted most men who are good are already in relationships. Plus who wants to get into it with divorced men who have baggage like kids, or worse yet got divorced for a good reason? It's bleak, all who's leftover are manchildren who haven't grown up, and I have zero patience to tolerate having to train another grown ass man on how to be in a relationship.
I'm trying to get my feet wet again for a serious relationship by sparking up one online, I mean with covid and whatnot. I thought not having physical access would mean men might be on their best behavior and would want to put their good foot forward before meeting up. But this guy I've been talking to isn't impressing me. Instead he's clingy and needy which is pathetic because he's older than me. I feel like he baited me in with white lies and made himself seem more independent than he actually is. He promised me things that he couldn't actually back up after all, and no telling when he can. At the end of the day, he's some mentally unwell goofball who doesn't do shit with himself and is happy to live at home where he doesn't have to worry about basic chores or even what meals to cook because mommy takes care of him. When he told his parents about me, he said their reaction was "How messed up is she to see something in you?" Fucking yikes! Also just what I'd need: Some domineering matriarch breathing down my neck when I'm gainfully employed, have multiple degrees, own my own vehicle, and live on my own because she's paranoid she didn't raise her son right. I'm still shocked he told me what she said, surprised he didn't hide this like he did his other half-truths.
Maybe his mommy is right, what the hell is there to him? He doesn't drive, he isn't handy, and his knowledge is in useless shit that he's never going to capitalize on.
I got annoyed with him today because he pestered me all day to video chat. Because all he does when he's not working at his barista job is sit in his chair and plays games–not the image he sold to me when we first started talking btw. Meanwhile I had to clean an entire apartment by myself because my roommate doesn't help, cook for myself, and then worry about the personal grooming shit I had to do for the upcoming work week. I was exhausted but I managed to video him at 7pm, only for him to be half-focused and playing a fucking game! I'd rather have been watching a youtube video and doing my nails, yanno relaxing after my day but no. This guy badgered me to video and then when I do he disrespects my time by playing a video game (as if the clacking of the keys themselves when I'm trying to talk weren't annoying enough), and said how he didn't do anything all day and had nothing to say (wow, shocker!). And god forbid if I tell him I'd rather be doing something else than watching him play a video game while he expects me to carry the conversation. I told him how I felt about him playing a game after he begged to chat, and all he did was resist and make excuses, like "But I'm a streamer I'm able to do both!!" No he isn't btw. Then I got up to go switch my laundry over, and he got snippy because he thought I was being 'passive aggressive' from having gotten up to do my laundry and thought I had just walked away on purpose. Heaven forbid I legitimately had to do my laundry cause I have to actually be responsible for my own shit and have clean clothes for the week. He can't fathom that. Pretty sure his mom does all his chores.
I don't trust his manbaby ass, he wants to come visit and he bought the tickets already. Now I just want to tell him to not come. I know I don't have to date him if I don't want to, but sleeping with him would be repulsive to me for the fact that he's a child in a 6ft man's body. What would it take to find an equal? I won't even entertain finding a man who would actually support me because it's gonna be like finding a unicorn, but can they at least be functioning adults? Why are men so fucking pathetic anymore?
No. 570500
>>570497Thanks anon.
I really don't want to be alone. A serious relationship is one of my biggest aspirations. I just know that it isn't worth it to endure another frustrating man just to be able to say I'm in one. It's very lonely.
No. 570501
>>570495mte and like boo hoo, you'd have to lose a couple of kilos to become an ana chan stacey again
I can understand feeling fat when you're not actually overweight but god, the melodrama and whining are so obnoxious
No. 570518
>>570494this dude sounds like an actual infant. tell him to refund those tickets or sell them.
i'm 24, currently a virgin (lol) and can't get in a long term relationship if my life depended on it. idk how normie girls are able to find guys and tolerate them for long periods. 28 seems quite young to me, but i understand how you feel man, most people my age have had long term bfs and ive yet to keep one for 6 months. how do people even meet men nowadays??
No. 570519
Can I be petty for a quick moment?
After bullying and terrorizing me last year over a surprise trip to Europe that I "didn't deserve", family member in question sends me a shitty gift with no thought behind it, several weeks after my birthday in May, and then I catch her bragging about it behind my back to the rest of my family like she won a peace prize. So I put it in her bag lady purse because I felt wrong taking something from someone who hurt me deeply and is general, an abusive bitch 90% of the time to me.
It's about as bad as the blackmail "gifts" I used to get from my father when my parents first split - just the weirdest, most thoughtless shit from the corner of the local Walmart as some retarded passive aggressive attempt to guilt me into liking them, especially after they know how hurt I am.
Like y'all, I don't need no goddamn ugly ass flowers, or a shitty card, I just want people to stop fucking hurting me and breaking my heart and then trying to manipulate me like this. For fuck's sake, I would rather people NOT give me anything than give me things they know I probably won't like, but are just using as bait to try and make me look like a bad person. Fuck.
No. 570543
>>570542The point's not who you're friends with. The point is that open online spaces are like this, performative wokeness is all over social media for example and you're vulnerable in such a setting. Of course you can pick your friends however you like but you want to expand your horizons beyond your friend group too and share your thoughts with other people, but on somewhere like Twitter partaking in the collective space can be risky under these conditions. You really can't deny that there's a certain mainstream discourse that dominates the etiquette.
It's such a shame we don't have forums and message boards anymore, you're literally at the mercy of social media and imageboards for discussion.
No. 570545
>>570543true, it's why i don't have a twitter. site's a shithole and saying the wrong word will get you lambasted by people you've never even spoken to. it's especially funny when you consider the fact that these same people on twitter fandoms (like a good chunk of them) use websites like lolcow and 4chan and integrate just fine and use the "
problematic" board language. it's all performative and annoying. so i get your point
No. 570546
>>570532You're not NLOGing, you're just not a dumbass libfem.
Unfortunately your only options are to distance yourself by avoiding social media and other people's opinions as much as possible, or embracing your rage and intentionally reading gender critical stuff to reinforce your opinions. That can backfire, sometimes it makes me feel better to know that there are likeminded women out there, sometimes the exposure to bullshit drives me nuts and I have to take a break from thinking about it at all.
No. 570550
>>570469Online tests are not the most reliable things ever, only a specialist can give you an accurate diagnosis. If you are worried about this, you can take an appointment with somebody.
I relate to you, I've suspected I have autism or ADHD for quite a while, but the fact that you and I are sufficiently normie passing is all that matters imho. As long as we function in society and sperg out behind close doors, it will be fine.
No. 570551
I don't even know where to start… Every close friendship I've had with a man has resulted in them becoming emotionally dependent on me at one point or another before I decided to end it. In a lot of these cases it's because I become burnt out and end up ghosting them (which I admit is a really shitty thing for me to do). I just can't stand it anymore when a guy tells me his whole life story and expects me to feel sorry for him or when he messages me whenever he feels sad because he wants me to validate his emotions. I used to have pretty shit self-esteem, so all we'd do is complain about how miserable we were and feel sorry for each other. My most recent "friend" would message me 2-3 times a week during quarantine just to "check in" on how I was doing in these "hard times", which I guess should have been nice, but I couldn't help but feel so infantilized. During school, the same guy would message me pretty much everyday to ask how I was doing and I started to hate it. I don't know what's wrong with me, since all of these things should be nice and I'm sure a lot of people wouldn't mind this, but I just really, really started to hate it.
I've never been in a relationship but I'm not even interested in dating anymore because I'm so burnt out. If I did date someone, I'd want him to be completely self-sufficient (especially emotionally) so that he couldn't become dependent on me. Some of my friends think that I'm being too harsh and unreasonable. Maybe I am. Recently, I've really prioritized self-sufficiency and independence in my life, but I wonder if I'm doing it too much to the extent that I might be pushing actual good people away too. I guess it would be nice to date someone eventually, but I'm too afraid because the only guys who seem to be interested in me are the ones who put me on a pedestal in exchange for performing all of their emotional labor. I know that it's important to be there for your friends when they're going through a hard time, but at certain points it would just get so uncomfortable. I've never felt that way with any of my female friends.
My roommate has a bunch of guy friends and her relationships with them are so wholesome and healthy. She says she loves it when they're vulnerable with her because it means they trust her enough to talk about their feelings since they rarely do. It makes me feel like a cold-hearted witch that I don't feel the same way anymore. One of my friends constantly reminds me how fucked up I am that I ghosted my most recent friend without telling him why and I admit that it is wrong, but I can't be assed to offer him an explanation. It makes me sad that these friendships made me a worse person, like I haven't even dated anyone yet and I'm already jaded. Or I've been shitty all along. I don't even know anymore.
No. 570552
>>570532Joining a local radfem group was the best thing I did anon, specifically because of this kind of bullshit.
Not only is this line of thinking retarded and harmful to women, it's also a uniquely American/Canadian thing that's being exported to other countries including mine via the internet. Same as celebrities in my country virtue signalling about BLM yet spitting on the local traveller population and treating them like dogs. Most of those talking points originate from sheltered, middle-class North Americans with no goal or career in their lives talking out of their arse about "third genders" or two-spirits despite not having any context or understanding about half the shite they're yakking on about.
Little girls in India are raped and murdered so often, I don't care if some spineless nonce wants to kill himself because not enough people validate his silly delusions and tell him he's special. If a dose of reality is all it takes, just get it over with and do it. I don't see them as women and I shouldn't apologise for it.
That same nonce will later hop on Twitter telling domestic abuse sufferers he wants to punch and rape them with his girldick yet they don't go on crying how they want to kill themselves because of it.
Women spouting this nonsense are doing it either for woke points or because they know they'll be eaten alive if they don't conform. In which case I've fuck all to lose, let them crucify me if they want, at least now I have a support group of like-minded people.
No. 570554
>>570542NTA, but how did you find them?
>>570532It's crazy how the main Women Policers are women themselves. I genuinely think they believe by cancelling/harassing other women enough, they think non-feminist men will be impressed, believe they have conviction and start supporting feminism. They're trying to do some fake version of equality where we pretend men and women totally do the exact same things and are just as
problematic as each other. It must make them feel really good.
The sad truth is, we're not the same. Also, men don't police each other the same way, and they literally never will. They don't support that outlook, and when they see women write bullshit callout posts about eachother and tear each other apart for being the least bit "
problematic", they don't see a group of strong women with conviction righting all wrongs from both sexes equally, they just say "These hyper-woke feminists are cannibalizing each other for not being progressive enough. Classic, typical catty women". After that, they go on to continue complaining about how feminists are hypocrites that let other women get away with everything, because it's not actually about honest concerns with anti-feminist arguments, it's about deflection from men's issues.
Also, I low-key feel like it's mainly
very male-attracted/otherwise male-aligned women who are like this most often. They love men far too much to not try to pander to them, and they don't want their dating options (or just overall male acceptance) to be reduced because of their political views, so they "compromise" by being extra harsh on other women to prove they're not man-haters. This method doesn't work as intended for the reasons mentioned above, but they really don't know what else to do (plus, it certainly makes them feel good/righteous in the moment). When you add in the women who just harass other women over petty shit like jealousy, but masquerade it as being a champion for social justice, it makes communities with lots of women very
toxic.
I don't know the solution to all this, but reading your vent made me want to vent, too.
No. 570566
File: 1592215743427.jpg (37.75 KB, 564x542, 1591308031481.jpg)
Why am I so shit at just doing my work? No matter how much time I'm given to do an assignment I will do it exactly at the last minute and I can't even keep enough attention to do it all at once. If it's not getting distracted than it's not knowing what to write. Maybe I'm just a lazy bitch, but fuck me its getting annoying being unable to just do work.
No. 570592
>>570532>Why do men get to live so free compared to us and why do women take part in this farce that always has us under the magnifying glass?Women love being moral enforcers. It happens in here too. You'll notice that the only "men" who pull this kind of shit are the trannies and reddit soyface betacucks (and those are just predators trying to disguise themselves, not true believers)
Makes you think that maybe there was a point to the keeping women away from politics thing
No. 570607
File: 1592221727473.jpg (32.65 KB, 780x439, 5oZu3WVxopQg6fyYnzW9kWSf7M4.jp…)
Mfw jpop and kpop are so popular now but no one cares about chinkpop or chink otaku culture in general yet… I guess it doesn't help that chinese media exists in its own bubble, only small portions leak onto youtube.
I wanna talk about music and dramas and disgusting amount of BL. The only people who care rn are scattered groups of SEAfags. sad noises
Maybe it'll catch on eventually seeing that some manhua and MXTX novels are popular.
No. 570609
>>570600>>570603Not a man, I literally just said the same thing other anons did. Women being strong moral enforcers is well documented fact, and we're clearly seeing the annoying consequences of individuals with that disposition inhabiting the world of politics. I didn't say rights should be revoked, just that clearly there were reasons to be wary - and the same applies to men who don't have a proper education and got fucking Trump elected.
You don't need to be a man or have ulterior motives to understand this
No. 570612
>>570609>the same applies to men who don't have a proper education and got fucking Trump elected.So, the problem is education, not being a woman. You could've just said that, especially since women do better on average academically than men, kek.
This "maybe the misogynists were
right after all xd" thing whenever women are annoying or dumb is so corny and almost tradthot-like.
I promise they hated us before Voltron discourse and other kinds of Twitter sperging.
No. 570614
>>570613All I said was
>>570600 and then explained my point of view after anon explained theirs.
No. 570618
>>570552AYRT and I lurk plenty of politically charged feminist spaces leaning towards radfem but I don't want my life to be ruled by simply political discourse, I want to have other interests and hobbies too. It's just impossible because every public space is dominated by people who are openly misogynistic but above criticism as their misogyny is the more "accepted" type and veiled in progressiveness. Literally had to watch a fandom-based public discord server burst into flames about how evil JK was for saying that all that menstruate are women.
>>570554All of this. The "hyper-woke feminists" are all yearning for male attention even if they claim to "hate men" and deploy politic views set by none other than men. I very much doubt they focus on bullying other women just to liberate their own gender, if they did they'd be more focused on calling out the tradthots who want women to return to being baby making machines and kitchen appliances put into one, not legitimate feminists saying stuff like "women don't have dicks", criticizing the porn industry or similar talking points that would make sense to anyone who sincerely wants to see women thrive.
No. 570620
>>570612>the problem is education, not being a womanNo, the issue is lack of education plus female psyche. I wouldn't call it a problem exactly - for fuck sake, anons right above me were talking about men not giving a shit about these things, acknowledging psychological differences isn't something out of this world for this place. We usually consider ourselves better than men because of it since it means we actually give a shit about not being complete assholes.
>"maybe the misogynists were right after all xd"Not saying they're right to hate women, or that this is why they hate women. I literally just said that women have a certain disposition and, considering the way politics work, this disposition
is something that needs to be handled carefully. Which isn't out of this world either, we're literally complaining about its results.
I should probably have minded where I am and the kind of handmaiden we usually talk about in here and worded my initial comment differently but I promise you I didn't mean it in any tradthot sense.
No. 570628
File: 1592223988175.png (229.88 KB, 558x491, 1591816826886.png)
>>570625>literally chimping out telling people to shut up over being wrongyou certainly shouldn't be in politics
No. 570632
File: 1592224241506.gif (1.74 MB, 313x313, oh nooooo.gif)
>>570631
Yep keep samefagging i'm sure it'll work if you repeat yourself again and again
No. 570637
>>570620Everything
>>570622 said, honestly. What do you even mean by female psyche? Some innate "ladybrain" thing, or what?
Men certainly give a shit, they just channel it into more destructive things, like direct violence and/or deliberate, continual stalking, rather than the "so and so doesn't support porn, please block and stay safe fwends!!" we see with women.
No. 570640
>>570622>What's your point? My initial point was just to make a snarky comment, I assumed that because I was posting to lolcow it would be pretty clear I was just poking fun at the woke hysterics.
I don't think the source of this tendency really matters, because we have enough women who aren't like that to prove that there really isn't a "SJW chromosome that makes us go full ourobos" (lmao, thanks for that one) and that whatever it is that created the woke ouroboros isn't
just women's tendency to moral police. It's this tendency
plus something else
(that something else is a lack of religion if you ask me, it has historically been the best way to cope with strong moral sentiments, but that's beside the point).
Men aren't exactly rational either, leaders tend to fall
victim to hubris and fuck up colossally - I was just reading about systems that chose their leaders partially by chance in order to mitigate that. So no, I don't think we let the males handle these things. Just that people have shit tendencies that you need to account for and find ways to mitigate/prevent from having a lot of impact because the potential for harm is huge.
Politics affects literally everyone's lives, it shouldn't be taken as lightly as it is. And it shouldn't aggregate so many varied functions that used to be performed by other institutions.
No. 570643
>>570638I posted
>>570626 but the others could be one person. You okay chimpout-chan? What's brought this on? You can tell us.
No. 570644
File: 1592224773528.jpg (95.06 KB, 500x537, suck a deek beech.jpg)
>>570638I'm one of the people and it's not the same person. Lolcow is a public imageboard where many people can post
(infighting, serial ban evader) No. 570647
>>570638Yeah seriously!!
>>570622This
>>570637Don't you know anon? Women are born perfect empathetic fragile angels who must be shielded from politics lest she goes sicko mode on her lady friends for not being tranny shills
No. 570648
>>570637>Some innate "ladybrain" thing, or what?I mean, yeah, sort of. I don't understand how we can acknowledge that biological males commit the majority of crimes and are the main perpetrators of violence but then deny that there's any difference between an XX brain and an XY brain.
>Men certainly give a shit, they just channel it into more destructive things, like direct violence and/or deliberate, continual stalkingWhich tend not to be at all about morality, except in cases where morality affects them
directly (which is why there is a huge overlap between incels and alt-righters). Giving a shit about matters that don't affect you directly just because they're wrong is a typically female trait.
>>570646>>570647>missing the point this hard>strawmanning that inaccuratelyI'm sorry I can't speak brainlet and make this any more accessible to you lmao. The other anon seemed a little smarter so hopefully she'll actually read what I'm saying and not just recognize a couple words and assume I'm some stereotypical sytrawman.
No. 570691
>>570257Sorry to hear that. Why did the dog make it worse?
OT, but i'm
triggered by this dog living downstairs who wont stop barking but i'm worried about how to approach the neighbors about it.
No. 570695
>>570672There is a huge difference between being anti-men and not wanting to wade through a bunch of dumb male opinions about camgirls and costhots. This is a big reason why the site sucks right now. The site was never anti-men we were just against maleposting. Even the manhate threads never had such embarrassing levels of anti-male sentiment in them. Again big difference between complaining about men and being anti-male. Radfem or otherwise the anti-male anons are cancer because they (including you) can't have a discussion or read anything that isn't blatantly anti-male. Most of us don't want to spend all our time on the site thinking about how shitty men are, and we certainly don't want every casual conversation to become some dumb contest. You're not outting anyone by accusing anons of being men and pick mes or whatever it may be, you're just admitting you want the site to be an echo chamber and showing that you're not mature enough to handle or even read things you disagree with. If being exposed to opinions you don't agree with, whether they are
valid or not is too much for you I don't know what to tell you. Please find an echo chamber somewhere else. People like you ruin what makes being anon so refreshing.
No. 570700
>>570695Exactly, ironically they are making the site entirely about men more than any of the alleged 'men' who post here (which I think happens extremely infrequently if ever). They derail any topic to be about how much they hate men and centre men in everything by calling other anons pick me's constantly. It's been years of them being told this isn't a radfem safe haven and they aren't welcome, to the point all their threads are locked and they have their own
board and they still don't get it and refuse to leave. They are just intent on ruining the site for some reason.
No. 570703
>>570607Kpop is super popular but jpop? Nah. Anime is the only popular form of jpn media.
However it does look like cpop and cdramas are getting more popular lately, especially with that Youth with You survival show and that BL-bait historical cdrama (can't remember what it's called).
No. 570725
>>570667>and there's no evidence that male and female brains are different. There is, actually.
>>570672Do you want a timestamped picture of pussy, bitch? It's not my fault you're such a brainlet you can't interpret a reasonable opinion about sex differences without having a meltdown because wah wah a mean anon said men and women are different! That's misogyny! wah wah. Real radical feminists, you know, the ones who started the whole feminism thing, were all very aware of everything I talked about. It's like you dumb bitches have never heard of Marx and think your feminism sprouted fully formed as a response to trannies, holy shit.
No. 570741
>>570734>Why coming back bother me if he doesn't even care?Well, he still doesn't care about
you but that doesn't mean he doesn't care about the attention you give him. It makes him feel good to know you still respond.
The solution is to not respond, because it's actually not petty to quit speaking to someone who's only using you.
No. 570745
>>570734It's typical low effort orbiting. He wants you to stick around in the sense he might want to get with you in the future if nothing better comes along.
He wants attention and options. Give him neither.
No. 570760
>>570751I'm so sorry, anon. I'm sure your cat knows how much you love him, and loves you too. Cats are very good at hiding their pain.
I hope he pulls through, but even if he doesn't, at least he's here with you now (and has been all this time).
No. 570762
File: 1592242830325.jpg (31.05 KB, 500x354, 500_F_20030663_sFtZiaO4KmuMfqD…)
>>570759Dude, just block him and go to sleep. No need to kill yourself over this trivial shit.
No. 570765
>>570759If you feel this shit block him on insta and delete the app. People make jokes about contacting their ex when they know it's a bad idea for a reason. Yes, he's a horrible human being and it's mortifying you did that, but you'll get through this.
>>570764Once things start opening up, sign up to volunteer! I definitely plan to.
No. 570766
File: 1592243731937.jpg (530.46 KB, 640x429, DSC00436.jpg)
bf wants me to get a boob job to have big anime tiddies but i like mine. plus i'm short so an unnaturally gargatuan chest would make me look ridiculous. i have perfectly healthy tiddy…
No. 570783
>>570777just like "hey would you let me buy you implants"
i think he's slightly physically out of my league and i feel so trash now lmao…
No. 570790
>>570783He's gross. To even ask that makes him kind of a dick, not gonna lie.
>i think he's slightly physically out of my league and i feel so trash now lmao…If he was, he wouldn't be dating you. Guys don't enter relationships out of charity.
The worst part is there is no guarantee he'll stay or even find you more attractive post-implants, and you'll be the one stuck lugging around a giant pair of tits you didn't even want, probably end up covering any/all removal costs, surgery scars, etc.
No. 570794
>>570787>>570792She always says "I'm telling you for your own good" and I get what she's saying that saggy big tits look gross on my body but I was feeling pretty today and thought I'd take a few pics and went to show her and she started about my back posture, my boobs and my hair and I just started crying. She could've said it tomorrow. She's like 'young girls like you have firm perky breasts and you look like a haggard mother of 3'
I'm just ranting at this point. I can't leave her because she's a single mom and I couldn't bear seeing her all lonely.
No. 570823
>>570808>>570803Don’t go fucking carnivore anon. Research some healthy foods/a balanced diet to treat PCOS
it isn’t stuffing yourself with red meats but don’t fuck up your body even more
No. 570835
File: 1592254563145.jpg (21.63 KB, 247x109, IMG_4291.JPG)
>There's a pedo thread on fit right now
>it's one of the top threads
> mods aren't doing anything (yet)
I think once the thread gets deleted, I'll post post a comment warning the girl that pedos are creeping at her and she might get groomed
No. 570850
File: 1592256201458.jpg (64.17 KB, 720x646, IMG_20190529_111252.jpg)
>me, wanting to reach out to someone I like
>"hey this reminds me of you haha" insert witty inside joke
>him:"um not really but ok I guess"
I'm never talking to other people again.
No. 570851
>>570816I decided this year to keep myself ignorant to pedo statistics and behavior + I highly recommend it. It's become so prevalent online, even in normie spaces like reddit and yt, that it's difficult not to become distraught and paranoid over it. It kind of helps to remember that the people arguing about it online are usually just larping incels hoping to piss people off, and not the irl predators/sex traffickers themselves.
>>570827I've been in the same boat but thankfully my current bf also has a low sex drive (or is doing a convincing job of hiding his libido). I'm glad you guys talk about it because my previous ex snapped and became
abusive over it, at one point asked me for an ""open relationship""
No. 570854
>>570831i feel incredibly lucky to have him since he hasn't once shamed me for my sexuality but i wish he didn't feel so bad over it. first he thought he simply was too ugly and too bad at sex to make me aroused, and now he thinks he's forcing his sexuality on me.
he ended up crying over this too. fuck.
>>570839give me a crumb of your libido, anon.
No. 570867
File: 1592257498514.jpeg (77.17 KB, 400x386, C6638AC6-8B3C-4754-8507-EC51A7…)
>>570844>>570838I want that too… I also have a nice bf, and pleasant enough coworkers, but I want a close, girly friendship like I had in high school. Wish there was a way to make friendships like that when you’re not really apart of any social institutions.
No. 570910
Update from this post
>>568618 to say that I probably don't have breast cancer. Apparently I have fibrocystic breasts, which is annoying but harmless. I've been referred for an ultrasound of my breasts to play it safe, but I should be fine.
No. 570913
File: 1592265114672.jpeg (148.32 KB, 460x690, 522c00f24e0e2.jpeg)
>>570850If it makes you feel any better, once I sent pic related to a friend and he says
>>>reminds me of my abusive father No. 570919
File: 1592265811025.jpeg (94.29 KB, 1125x1125, BB719193-4111-4498-8388-0562A7…)
Really tired of picking apart my face and body. I find beauty in a lot of different body types and faces, I have my favorites but of course I never like anything on me. Even when I see a girl with the same kind of lips or body type, I love her body but take issue with my own. Sometimes I can’t even take pictures or look in the mirror. Is anyone else dealing with this? I hear voices in my head telling me I have an unfortunate body or face and it’s just exhausting.
No. 570947
>>570523No, no, it's totally fine anon, I actually feel bad for laughing a little because I feel you. I have been where you are just looking at these "gifts" wondering, how the hell am I supposed to use this shit?
I used to get long ass "me me me" rambling letters from my dad when I was 16ish. I guess he really thought I wanted to read a 4 page rant about "the past", which he was never apart of, such as him describing an imaginary family life when I was really little…the same one he seemed to have spontaneously forgot about with us fighting all the time and him calling me names and my mother avoiding him due to his infidelity and selfishness.
Thankfully he's stopped wishing me happy birthday on his twitter page, so I hope now he's finally moved on and realized that no, it wasn't my mom or my grandmother manipulating me…it really was me all along keeping my distance from him for a lot of reasons. I honestly think he and his family had a major falling out because I went snooping through his instagram and I noticed he doesn't talk or follow his sister anymore, which is such a major top kek moment for me because they acted like they were always such an uwu strong family unit. Guess not.
No. 570957
File: 1592276367977.jpg (36.04 KB, 640x443, mgsbigyikes.jpg)
Some new hire at my job went insane and went off on my shift lead just because she was asking him to do something simple. He legit just raged at her and got in her face, screaming. she held her ground, but that shit freaked me out.
We had to call the cops to come in and stop him before he got violent and then he even went off on the cops and they threatened to handcuff him and lead him out, but he eventually left with them willingly. Luckily our lobby is closed and no customers were inside, but wtf is wrong with entitled men!? It was really sad because she told me as a boss, it wasnt even the first time a male coworker beneath her got in her face like that. I felt so bad. She's actually really nice and i cant imagine being a female boss in this male dominated world. she was shaken up by the whole incident.
No. 571033
>>571006sounds like they're very insecure. it's rude to take your insecurities out on people but i think they panic whenever they feel left out and can only see the times they've been "abandoned" instead of objectively looking at the situation…
maybe have an honest conversation about this with them?
No. 571107
>>571057Did you ever get molested / sexually harassed by a woman?
Maybe you repressed it and this is how it's coming out. Sure sounds like what a predatory gay would say to their straight
victim.
No. 571131
>>571123take a break from men, and maybe from dating altogether. if you try to date again, focus on women.
now you could go to therapy if you experienced abuse or you see those relationships impacting your behavior.
the only way to truly trust men again though will be to live and eventually meet men who don't behave like dumb assholes. they do exist you just don't know when you'll meet one.
No. 571145
>>571128Horrifically
abusive. Total Reddit MRA loving pickme turned into an even worse fakeboi living out a constant fetish. Never again.
No. 571274
>>571202lmao you're a cuck then. Hispanics also are the subject of police violence but BLM could give less than a shit about that. Have fun sucking up to black people while getting nothing in return.
My family immigrated outside of the west and had nothing to do with slavery, yet I'm still called racist by people like you because I don't want to give all of my money up to black people. This also when black people often hate immigrants and don't have problems destroying immigrant businesses.
No. 571292
>>571283From what I remember, that anon used to talk about how the roommate complimented
her Lolita wardrobe and was totally jealous.
I guess she finally got a Lolita dress of her own, and now anon is seething, kek.
No. 571317
>>570507"Hey can you try to mute yourself when clearing your throat? I don't like that sound"
If you can't ask that question your relationship is absolute trash
No. 571327
>>57131Heh, I read it as ""Hey can you try to mute yourself by cutting your throat? I don't like that sound"
I really liked it. It was brutal.
No. 571358
>>571351Film her being an
abusive bitch and sabotage her social life
No. 571377
>>571373Aw…anon.that sounds like me. He loves you so much and wants you to be happy that he can't help but want to always make sure you feel that you are
valid.
No. 571379
>>571359The extreme specificity of this vent just really sums up what it is to be in a relationship with another person. It's these exact quirks and the weight that they develop in a relationship that no dating advice column can ever really prepare you for.
Start getting your meat from a different store if he isn't going to listen to you.
No. 571482
>>571373 >asks if he should make me coffee, etcDamn this part sounds good lol
Seriously though look up 'attachment types' and you'll see he clearly fits into one type in particular. He'd benefit from a whole lot of therapy.
>this makes him sound insecure and obsessive but I promise he's not, and we're working on some kind of "safe word" I can say to instantly reassure him I'm completely fine and don't need anything from himIt is obsessive and he is insecure, that's exactly what it is. He needs to address that fact and seek therapy. Your safety word won't be enough. This is an issue he's likely to carry into all his future relationships too so it's his job to find a professional and work on it, not yours.
No. 571491
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>My parents : I’m not racist I respect decent blank people but those blacks on tv deserve police shooting them because majority of them have criminal tendencies anyway, look what they did to Target but MLK was an intelligent man but why don’t they ever produce any Nobel prize winners in STEM like the Jews. How dare they pull down statues they are destroying history
>me: There is a black Nobel prize winner, you have just never heard of him, a minority doesn’t represent the majority, sociocultural factors have a undeniable impact on the behavior of people, conditions in black communities can be improved to the betterment of everyone, police are judges or jury to decide if people die, you weren’t even born in the US why do you care about statues of confederate generals but are fine with the fact that they destroyed 90% of community statues that are actually your heritage
>my parents: lol this is liberal propaganda I love you your my daughter but I can’t believe you fell for this dumb shit
>my white friends with neoliberal parents who’s house is decorated with tacky “world” art that they bought on various vacations: SUPPORT BLACK TRANS LIVES
>me: I post picture of my cat because I’m lonely and sad
>friends: YOUR SILENCE IS VIOLENCE UNFOLLOWED RACIST
Anons I feel so alone, there is no winning w/this shit
No. 571563
>>571442Idk but a friend of mine from college had a prank he always wanted to try for someone who deserved it. basically you freeze your pee in like a shallow bowl so it's like a disc/hockey puck. then you just slide it under their door (assuming it'll fit). then it thaws lol.
I think you can buy various animal urine online (to deter animals I think?) and I hear fox pee smells REALLY bad. i read about how they sprayed it on evergreens on a college campus and when someone cut one down for their Christmas tree it stunk up their whole house.
No. 571613
>>571606He can pretend that this is about your health but we all know what he's really hinting at here, also stressing someone out when they are already stressed from work..isn't great for their health
I can see why you want to break up
No. 571615
>>571609Good point. I'll make sure to tell him that he should volunteer to lecture middle school soccer teams if he really needs to tell someone how and when to exercise, kek.
>>571610>>571613He's a chubby guy who got a health scare and started taking care of himself. Which is extremly good on his part and I've been nothing but supportive of him. We both got together when we were chubby, so I'm pretty sure it's my health and not my looks he's most concerned about. Probably looks too, but I am more attractive when I'm fit, so you know, it's understandable.
Who knows. Perhaps breaking up would be the motivation I need to get back into the gym just so I can show him I don't need someone breathing down my neck about my health.
Thank you all for your replies. It's nice to come here and let out some steam.
No. 571621
>>571615sorry but just because you looked like this when he got together with you, doesn't mean he's concerned about your health. I could be totally wrong but based off of what you've written so far, you seem to turn all of his possible negatives into positives. Are you so overweight/obese that anyone walking past you would think "damn , she needs to get her shit together"? Are you pre-diabetic? Is there any real
valid reason for him to worry? If not, he (and again, I'm just being honest) could have gotten together with you because he assumed he couldn't get someone better. I'm basing that on weight alone.
No. 571622
>>571606If your diet is alright then why do you need to go to the gym? A simple walk would be enough, he could always offer to do exercise with you if he actually cared.
I don't know how you ladies date dudes like this. If some asshole was stressing me to go to the gym without doing shit to make my homelife easier, his face would meet my fists with the quickness.
No. 571627
>>571615Men do have this habit of always wanting women who are at least one league of attractiveness above them so my first impression here is that he lost some weight himself and now he thinks he's owed your fitness.
Like the other anons I do not believe this is health based. A chubby person doesn't fall apart from a few weeks out of the gym, there are so many other ways to become sick, stress and lack of rest are huge ones! He can dress this up all he likes but a man telling you to go to the gym is what it is, I've seen this happen to women right after they birth babies. Such health conscious partners lol