File: 1531912141410.jpg (13.63 KB, 245x245, 1519835946101.jpg)
No. 269173
I don't have this person in my life (and he was never a big part of it to begin with), but he was still annoying to listen to at times, although he's overall nice.
>Claims to speak "fluent French" (he's Canadian) yet has the thickest American accent, can't pronounce anything, can't even understand a simple sentence like "I'm going to the store" and has to ask me to translate everything, then insults me by saying that "French isn't even your native language, what would you know" (it is, I'm an immigrant but that doesn't change the fact that it is, I've lived here for 20+ years)
>incessantly flirts with me and doesn't get the hint when I say I'm not interested and don't flirt back
>constantly plans shit with me and forces himself and his feelings on me without ANY input from me whatsoever
>gets mad when I go out and have a life with friends because he's a shutin who can't do the same, constantly pesters and messages me, is a whiny bitch in general
No. 269184
>>269169Good for you anon. People who taunt others about their bodies are vile.
I used to have a really mean, hostile, physically violent “friend” (she was friends with the rest of my friend group) several years back who I was legit shit scared of. She could be really cruel and physically assaulted a couple of people who stood up to her, including one of our friends who tried to defend a girl she was stalking after and harassing. She weeded herself out once we graduated and is apparently avoiding my aforementioned friends like the plague now though.
No. 269185
>>269167Nah, tell her you're overweight by BMI (which I assume you mean by factually overweight). If she brings up the "BMI has been debunked" bullshit, go into how it actually underreports obesity in terms of body fat for most people living modern largely sedentary lifestyles and not much muscle.
Don't mention her weight or anything that would power her victim complex like that, just be clear about the facts.
No. 269187
>>269169Good for you, anon! I wish I'd been able to call out my "best friend" who, all through middle and high school, would constantly insist that I looked like a little boy and guys would never find me attractive because they wanted "curves" like hers. She was seriously obese and would spread rumours about me having anorexia because I was smaller than her and ate smaller portions than her. It even got to the point where a teacher approached me about it. Each time I tried to call her out she'd gaslight me and pretend she never said anything of the sort. Of course the worst things were said when there wasn't anyone else around to witness it.
I cut off contact with her after we graduated high school, but recently found out that my other friends from school are still in regular contact with her. She has lost a lot of weight and is now working as a child psychologist. I really hope she's changed.
No. 269212
>>269210Cont.
So I have suspecteded endometriosis and last month my period pain got so bad I had to go to a&e. He was staying at our house (because of fucking course he is) so he came with us (he just came along, wasn’t invited) and he was sitting with me in the waiting room while bf parks the car.
My name gets called by the nurse and I hobble over to triage. I sit on the seat and look up to see… THERE HE IS! He followed me into the nurse!
>hey do u think u can check the waiting room to see if bf is back from the car yet?>it’s no problem, I’ll just text him and let him know where we are.I was in too much pain to argue and I had to talk to the nurse about my period in front of this dickhead.
GET THE FUCKING HINTS.
Bf actually did tell him he stepped out of line for this one. But usually he lets him away with anything.
He seriously must have a touch of the tism
No. 269219
>>269218Arguing about him puts an even bigger strain on our relationship though. I was thinking about maybe talking with his mum.
He still lives with her so maybe she can talk with him. But maybe going behind a 30yo mans back to get his mummy to tell him off is petty.
I don’t know what to do.
No. 269234
>>269233Tell her to chill. Silence doesn’t need to be awkward.
Just tell her her energy is too high and to ring it in a bit.
No. 269238
>>269212Continuing vent
>he’s sitting in a dark living room on his own while bf makes dinner and I’m hiding from him in the bedroom>the dog I’m dog sitting is sitting with him>walk into living room to get something and stand in dog piss that has probably been there at least 20 mins>he proceeds to give me excuses while I’m trying to clean it upThanks for telling me mate
No. 269248
>>269182She apoligized and was very responsive, she promised to stop, so far so good.
But i did approach her calmly.
No. 269249
>>269184I'm so sorry anon, that sounds scary.
Insane bitch.
No. 269252
>>269187Thanks anon, im proud of myself and hope she changes, since we're about to move out together.
Im so sorry you went trough that, it can be so damaging to ones selfesteem. Im glad you cut off contact, some people change but rarely without some life changing crisis.
No. 269261
>>26916932DDD here, all but one fat chick I've ever been friends with has done this to me.
Ffs their tits are like 80% fat tissue, they don't even actually have big boobs. Just giant bags of lard.
No. 269265
>>269219Your SO is being a douche. If you guys are serious enough to have a baby together, he should be putting your needs above his friend's without question. You agreed to one night, it's total bullshit that he should make you feel obligated to deal with this guy for a week with no immediate timeline in mind for when he's gonna leave at all.
I hate to take it here, but I'd be extremely weary of having a baby quite yet with someone who is being this dismissive of your feelings and personal space. This might not seem like a huge deal, but red flags like these shouldn't be ignored.
No. 269267
>>269262Anon never said the were big at all. She said the girl always calls them small and child like.
Also, since anon is 105lbs, I'm guessing she's pretty short, so they actually would probably look larger than average for her frame.
No. 269268
>>269267well i mean she
does have small boobs. not saying she should be mocked, but she seemed to imply that they're not small by the way she said her weight and size. another chance is she's wearing the wrong size bra.
a lot of girls on the site seem to have no clue how bra sizes or breasts work in general. especially when you read
>>269261 implying regular breasts aren't 80% fat tissue.
No. 269269
File: 1531936210522.jpg (61.75 KB, 828x612, nci-vol-7127-72.jpg)
>>269261Lmao do you think breast are mainly made of muscles?
No. 269277
>>269268>>269269Kay, but you can't deny there's a difference between fat tissue in normal breasts vs fat girl's breasts. There's a reason why when they lose weight, they lose boob.
Also, if you know so much about how breasts work, why are you denying that 32D on a small girl is still proportionately big? Proportion matters when discussing whether or not someone has big boobs.
No. 269284
File: 1531937602925.jpg (8.57 KB, 270x262, b724a549b4e4161d8d261fd54dc32b…)
>>269277anon, 32D just means her underbust is 32in and breasts are 36in. it's not going to look big on anyone unless her bra size is wrong. pic related is 32D
No. 269287
File: 1531937776349.jpeg (29.96 KB, 480x360, B848A089-B34B-452E-9AA7-857929…)
>be 23, lived in japan since 18 years old
>went home for thanksgiving and was very active on instagram at the time, notice a girl 4 years older than me commenting a lot on my stuff and trying to engage with me.
>we start DMing and start to hit it off as friends. I learn she has a Japanese ‘fiance’ of 3 months that she met in her hometown. She plans to move to Osaka to be with him a few months after I get back to Tokyo. Little bit of a weeb for japan, but couldn’t speak japanese, just google translated shit for her ‘japanese following’. Goes to Japanese restaurant almost every day uploading pics of Japanese food. All the while her boyfriend in Osaka gets a new job and manages to pay out big bucks for a high rise apartment for the both of them.
>friend ends up being crazy and starting fights with her fiance for no reason.
>doesnt leave her house unless i go down to visit her and literally guides her on how to use the subway
>spends all her time on youtube trying to be a failed vlogger with less than 100 views per video. Doesnt at least have the decency to cook or buy her fiance a warm meal after he works a 8~10 job to pay for the roof over her head, despite coming with over 9,000usd. She forces him to take her out to eat every night, on his dime of course (because she “apready has to pay for her own breakfasts and lunches!!!!”). Doesnt clean up her messes in the apartment, and expects him to create more art for her failed youtube channel after already working overtime (he was an artist for advertising or some shit like that)
>I get 5~7 calls per day with her literally sobbing on the other end everytime he calls her out on her selfishness and tells her to cut that shit out and grow the fuck up.
>she acts like a poor abused victim and submits a huge over exaggerated post on a mutual expat favebook group that we are a part of. Gets a lot of buttpats from other women who back her up and say shes being emotionally manipulated and verbally abused. This basically fuels her.
>also start getting calls from the boyfriend multiple times a day so he can tell his story. Sometimes they would switch over on the same line. This happens evey day.
>she basically drags me along and tries to cheat on him and flirt with some mutual friend of his while spending the whole day bitching about him.
>threatens to go home at least once a day
>become friends with the bf’s friends while drinking together in Osaka- we all agree and see that she’s fucking crazy. She goes and visits his family in the countryside a few times- they agree she’s crazy too and fucking hate her.
>they end up breaking up for good and she goes back to america after being in japan for 4ish months.
>still tries to keep in contact with me and shit talks her ex. Even says shit like “i think his family and friends liked me more than they liked him!!”
>keeps messaging me things like “i miss japan so much, its a second home to me” despite refusing to assimilate and spending all day in her apartment and refusing to learn japanese past “konnichiwa” and “arigatou”
Now shes planning to go on holiday to Japan this fall, and keeps saying shit like “i hope i see my ex! I want him to see what he missed out on!” And “I’d still fuck him again if I ever got the chance. Like no bitch, he fucking hates your guts.
She swears that I’m taking this ‘holiday’ with her but in so busy with school and work, And she thinks i can just drop everything to help her and tour her around everywhere. She used to do that before, expecting me to ditch school and work to go hang out with her.
No. 269291
I seem to have the opposite problem of everyone here:
>be 5'10, but skinny
>only have super short friends
>"look how sm0l I/my arm/my leg, etc look(s) next to you(rs) hehe"
>lightly hit one on the arm while joking, whines around for half an hour that she's not as strong as I am; it was literally just a tap
>go shopping, one of them looks at a shirt in size medium "ew, that's sooo big, no way anybody fits that!" they laugh
But whenever I tell them how insecure and manly I feel about being so tall, it's "Huh, why?!".
I never called them out on it.
I had an ED as a young teen, so everytime they compare their "tiny" selves with my "gigantic" body it makes me feel like shit.
Earlier I had a different group of friends, 2 of them are chubby, I was already skinny, and we would "support" each other at dieting; in the end both of them were fine, me not.
Another "friend" also didn't do anything about me starving, instead made comments about me having "birthing hips".
No. 269300
>>269284I'm well aware of how bra size is measured, anon.
Also, we have no idea what the height if that model is. You're acting like you know oh so much more about bras than everyone in the thread, but you're blatantly ignoring the role height plays into into it. A 32d is going to look a lot bigger on someone who's 5'1 than 5'6.
Also, no one is even arguing that it's big. You're the one who concocted that narrative for some reason. Literally all anyone is saying is that if anon is super short like her weight implies, 32d isn't small or child like and if anything would look somewhat large proportionately on her frame. You're acting like people are insisting she has gigantic hentai tits or something.
No. 269303
>>269301NTA but why is it that whenever people bitch about derails they rarely do it to the person who started the derailing to begin with, even when they're posting more than the people disagreeing with them? Tinfoil, but sometimes I wonder if the ~stop derailing~ comes from the initial person to derail because of this.
Sage for pointless off topic speculation
No. 269305
>>269167I mean if you're still interested in being her friend there's gotta be some way you can rework your diet so you can at least have a cheat meal with her like once or twice a month.
If she gets pissy after that then use her cheapskate attitude against her and say you're putting money into savings and shouldn't eat out often. Because eating out is way more expensive than buying games.
No. 269317
>>269307My guess is that she's probably wearing the wrong size and is like 28DDD.
We really should start a new topic for this discussion though.
No. 269319
>>269315One guy from my friend group started bringing his new gf to every single one of our get-together which wouldn't be a problem if she got along with most of us, but she really doesn't, and she always start bitching around and asking him to go home at 10 PM. The poor dude just wants to enjoy his friends a little bit, but he has to oblige or she will completely flip out.
She straight up cried last time he told her he wanted to stay a little longer but she was free to go home if she wanted to, I couldn't have rolled my eyes farther in my head.
No. 269325
>>269316That's sad you've never had a close enough friendship for you to see friendship as more than just a meme. Then again, I guess it probably doesn't bother you since you don't know what you're missing or seem to care that you are. To each their own I guess.
But yeah, it rightfully bothers people. Even if you don't care about friendship I don't see how you wouldn't understand why? This kind of behavior is actually emotional abuse 101. Isolating your partner from their friends, trying to keep them from making them, or just plain unhealthy levels of mistrust and jealousy are all among the top behaviors associated with toxic and controlling relationships. Also, there's a world of difference between putting your partner's needs before your friend's and just straight up not being able to have friends because your partner is a psycho jealous nutcase.
If you can't see what's wrong with this kind of behavior after thinking about it for more than five seconds, I fear for you if/when you're in a relationship.
No. 269328
My oldest friends are from the con scene, which I am no longer a part of, and they are incredibly self-centered, although they would never see it that way. They're very helpless, and if you took away the fandom, they would be very boring, desperate people. I'm rapidly growing apart from them. They were/are fun to drink with, but other than that, there's no connection.
>Constant Social Justice Warrioring
>Constant "LOL KIDS R U GROSS AMIRITE?"
>Constant excusing their shitty behavior but attacking others for the same thing
>Constantly stressed and depressed because if they weren't, what would they talk about?
>Bitch about things they absolutely have control over but don't feel like they should have to so because "Adulting is so hard"
> Lol Credit Card Debt! But I need this $300 figures, and this SM Jewelry and this vacation!
I realize I just need to severe it, because they were this way at 18-19, all through their 20s, and now it'll be 30s.
No. 269335
>>269330well, the majority of women are right in their suspicions that men can't be trusted around female friends. that's not to say all men are incapable of it, but i certainly understand the suspicion and fear. i don't think there's anything wrong with trying to temper that. men trying to control women's friendships is different, however, seeing as how most women are able to maintain platonic friendships with ease and aren't often as wholesale attracted to their male friends.
>>269325i've had close friendships with men, but tbh, seeing as how basically all of them were romantically interested in me and still made that clear that i was their first choice while in relationships, i can definitely see why their partners would not want them around female friends. and friendships always have a shelf life, imo, i just always am prepared for the reality that they will eventually either organically dissolve, or family will become much more important, etc.
No. 269339
>>269335>I was their first choice while in relationshipsDoes that mean they intended to drop their current gf for you if you decided to turn around and date them?
Wew. That's cold (on their part).
No. 269350
>>269339yeah, i've had it happen with multiple male friends, and it was really disappointing. rather than wait for someone they liked just as much as me, or hopefully more, they'd just settle for women that they'd effectively lead on. imo, men settle often and the only thing keeping them from dropping their gfs for their female friends is the fact that their friends aren't similarly into them. i totally understand why women would be worried about that, especially if they really care for these men.
>>269344i don't date guys like that.
No. 269352
>>269189Ugh, black guys that don't date black women are the WORST, there were only about ten black guys in my year at school and all but one of them ignored me for the sole reason that I was a black girl, and to back that up none of the white boys would go near me.
I don't think white and asian girls know how lucky they are
No. 269353
>>269350Jeez. That's some real suifuel, anon.
Do you think there are ways around it? Ideally my future s/o would have no friends like me, but I know that's unrealistic.
No. 269356
>>269335I feel like if you won't allow your man to be friends with women because you're that paranoid about him cheating on you, then you shouldn't be in the relationship in the first place. There's no way to have a healthy relationship with that much distrust. Most of my husband's friends are women and I couldn't imagine being jealous or suspicious enough to have a problem with it when he hasn't don't anything to earn that kind of distrust. Not to mention, if a guy is gonna cheat, he's gonna cheat regardless of if you let him have female friends. This idea that we should be treating men like mindless sex robots who can't control themselves is retarded since a) it reenforces the idea that men simply can't help themselves so they don't need to feel responsible for their actions and b) like I said, they're just gonna do it anyway, they're just gonna be lying even more in the process and cheating with someone you've probably never even heard of.
Also, while I agree that women are typically more capable of maintaining platonic friendships than men, shit tons of women still cheat with their male friends so I don't think it's fair to act like it's completely different. It's still extremely toxic and abusive either way.
And almost all my friendships are 10+ years old. Maybe part of why yours don't last has more to do with you and your world view regarding it than you realize?
No. 269367
>>269364Wow! Makes me want to shoot up a male-dominated classroom at university so bad.
Men really don't deserve to exist.
On topic so as not to derail with that vent, I hate friends that needlessly compete with everything you do. I grew up with a girl just like this and she's given me a weird hangup where I feel guilty sharing interests with others.
No. 269369
>>269368Short girl here. I certainly don’t.
While girls who do that are insufferable, the vendetta that some tall anons here have against short girls is creepy. We should appreciate all shapes and sizes as long as they’re healthy and not self destructive.
No. 269373
>>269340Of all the male friends I've had only one has ever tried to cheat on his girlfriend with me. Most of the others expressed interest when they were single, but any time they had a girlfriend, they controlled themselves just fine. Not sure why all your experiences with male friends have been shit, but that's not the universal truth for everyone.
>>269350But wouldn't the best thing for those women be to know those men's true colors and get out before they waste anymore time on them? All you're doing by not allowing your SO to be friends with a girl out of fear of cheating is accepting that you might have landed a low quality man that will betray you the second he has a chance… or punish an innocent man who isn't going to do anything wrong. Either way it's stupid. Yeah, it's understandable to be weary, but controlling their friendship because ~they're men~ is wrong and considered textbook abusive controlling behavior for a reason.
>>269355Or maybe people just don't hang around the same kind of shit-tier men you seem to have had the misfortune of knowing?
No. 269374
>>269315>screaming about how they never spend time together This part could be true, about him not ever spending time with her. Obviously the part about him spending all time with you sounds like insecurity.
He could be telling her anything.
I speak from a place of empathy. My bf has a lot of female friends too, which I'm okay with.
But this one time he invited a female friend to stay at our apartment and lied to her about how long she could stay. He told me a few days when he told her "until anytime" which meant a week before I pumped the brakes on the whole thing. She wasn't anyone I would be friends with naturally, and she made no effort to know me despite sharing my space.
They'd spend all night talking to each other, and he'd accompany her around the city showing her the sites, it looked like dating. It hurt me so bad because I was working bone rugged and wasn't in a good mental state to begin with. He really did hurt me with that out of his sheer ignorance and inconsideration, and when I told her to leave he did make me looking like a controlling snob because he played it off like I knew she'd be staying a week when he didn't say that.
Don't believe everything men tell you. He probably is neglectful. I don't believe any guy who harps about his woman being ~☆~so cray~☆~ yet he's still with her. Nope.
No. 269386
>>269353find a man with really exacting standards (not just physically) that you have a very strong emotional bond with. someone not impulsive and oversexed, hopefully.
>>269356in most cases, i definitely agree, but even if your partner has never done anything to rouse suspicion, it can be difficult to cope with male culture or the way males act in society, because it can definitely make you suspicious of your partner, even without him doing anything sus. i have read plenty of accounts by wives and women who thought their boyfriends or husbands were such good, decent people, only to learn that these men changed their behavior around them, and when they'd had seen them interact with their male friends, or other women, they realized they never even knew their husbands, boyfriends, etc. society encourages men to be deceitful, especially to women, and i can understand why even in good relationships, their 'paranoia' is justified. i mean, things like 'locker room talk' is defended and normalized by most men. men are encouraged to be socially and romantically duplicitous.
>a) it reenforces the idea that men simply can't help themselves so they don't need to feel responsible for their actions and b) like I said, they're just gonna do it anyway, they're just gonna be lying even more in the process and cheating with someone you've probably never even heard of. no, no one is saying they can't help themselves. it's entirely their own faults and they're totally culpable but this is the way they're socialized, so here we are. and wrt the idea that they'll cheat with anyone should they cheat, i don't necessarily agree. i think spending lots of time with women they have a history with might be much more tempting. it takes a lot more time, dedication, and express intent, to build a whole new relationship and cheat. i think it's easier to cheat with a friend, keep the infidelity hidden, and keep a steady supply of side action, should the friend be interested, than trying (and probably continually failing) to pick up a willing stranger as a guy, and keep this totally new relationship hidden. lot easier to hide your cheating if it's with a friend.
No. 269389
>>269386samefag but i forgot to also mention, it's a lot easier to 'accidentally' cheat with someone you're spending a lot of time with, especially if you're interested in them. like, crossing boundaries, kissing, etc, just as a result of having spent a lot of time together. it's still very wrong, but i think there's a marked difference between an impulsive kiss after having spent lots of time with a friend you're attracted to, and going out and trying to find some stranger to fuck. it could be that these 'paranoid, insane' girlfriends are worried about things like this unintentionally happening, especially if people drink while they hang out, etc.
No. 269438
>>269374Jeez, anon. I'm really sorry your boyfriend did such a shitty thing to you.
I'm totally with you on taking it with a giant grain of salt anytime a guy accuses his girlfriend of being crazy. In this case I believe him, though, because I've personally dealt with her shitty behavior and blatant lying countless times. She's controlling as fuck in pretty much every aspect of his life. I say that mostly on observation, not just his word.
>>269386Now that you mention it, I think culture does play a massive role in why I'm actually glad most of my husband's friends are women. My husband's old friends group was a shit show. He had one friend who believed there was no such thing as implied monogamy, so he would cheat on his girlfriends constantly using the justification of "well, she never explicitly said we were monogamous" and refused to tell them because "I don't want to deal with the drama". I won't deny that I was very worried about the influence someone like that would have on my husband, but he eventually ended up dropping that friend due to his horrific treatment of women. Now his only straight male friend is the kind of guy that's quick to remind you that you have a girlfriend if you so much as say you think someone's hot.
I honestly think someone with majority female friends is actually less likely to cheat because they're less likely to have it normalized or justified by their friends (at least around where I live, you'd have a hard time finding many women who drink that Kool-Aid). Yeah, there's always a chance that someone will try to seduce him and that he'll go along with it. I'm not gonna pretend there's 100% no chance my husband would ever cheat on me, but the dark reality is that that's a risk you take when you're in a relationship. Also, the more female friends they have, the more desensitized they get to being around women in general. I'd be much more worried if he had only one female friend, but that was who he spent most of his time with.
No. 269461
>>269372And tall girls can be insecure too. Anyone can be insecure, really.
>>269387I wasn’t trying to be but the person I was replying to was over generalizing. Normally, I wouldn’t give a shit but the tall girl/short girl thread is full of tall anons shitting on short girls.
>>269388Never said anything like that. Just said that some of the anons on here who claim to be tall seem to be hostile towards short girls. I don’t have any negative opinions on tall girls in real life. Reading comprehension is your friend.
No. 269513
>>269490she Single White Female'd/dasha'd your ass, but deleting all your social media because of this seems kinda crazy. like, i'd get it if some dude was harassing and stalking you and you got scared because they sent you threatening messages. but this is some chick sending you petty anons and copying your style? my SO is a dedicated (and good but i'm bias) artist and the most follows they've gotten is 5,000. you had 30k???? and you dropped it because of this ex friend? that's so sad. i mean, you're clearly an adult now, i don't see why you're still holding on to this. you should block them and move on, you're not 16 anymore.
at the end of the day why should your future as an artist suffer because some creepy bitch is trying to jack your style… block and ignore and move on… this has happened to my SO too, and they have a fraction of the following you had. so this is just weird to me tbh.
altough is2g every artist i know has a mental breakdown and deletes all their social media accounts for no reason at least once a year. must be something in those wacom tablets No. 269537
>>269513to clarify the reason i was afraid of her was because of her anger issues
she has attacked me in person which is why i contacted her parents
she would draw me, self insert me into her fandom art ( like using my beauty mark placement, scars, tattoos etc ) she was incredibly hate obsessed with me
to the point i did not want to say, but she is an incredibly creepy woman once she hit 18 she would make nsfw art of characters that are supposed to be me whether itd be gore or humiliation sex
she would make callout posts which seemed daily of false accusations
badly photoshopped selfies of my face with bruises & stupid text
constantly harassed my boyfriend trying to steal him from me which was all futile
i couldnt get her away from me, constant sock puppet accounts
i had thankfully moved out of this little town to college in the main city so at least i never have to see her again, at least i thought so
ive spotted her stalking me in person in the same places i eat
i do have a restraining order against her, but theres simply so little a piece of paper can do against an insane person
its the biggest regret of my life having this chick in my life & ever trusting her as a friend
No. 269591
>>269364A dude in my high school would flirt with me and hang out with me, and I eventually found out he had a GF, and I immediately stopped (if I had been) flirting with him because that's fucked. Funny though because even after I found out he was dating he touched my thigh and when I called him out on how disrespectful that is to his gf he told me he was TEASING me? Like he totally pulled the whole gaslighting 'i was joking' shit when he was doing really sexual gestures. And he acted like I was a bitch for calling him out. Because I don't 'understand how much he loves his gf'. I would've just told his gf but it's not my place and plus she hated ME probably, even though her boyfriend was a fucking sleaze. Suffice to say, we weren't very good friends after that. I kept my distance.
I hate men.
No. 269614
>>269611>tfw you've been that friendFeels bad.
It could be the alcohol, or perhaps he feels left out of the fun and that's just how he brings attention to himself.
No. 269618
>>269614Oh don't feel bad anon!! Our group of friends doesn't have any bad feelings about him due to this, it's just… uncomfortable, as I said.
He doesn't drink, I'm sure he just feels left out and I'm pretty sure everyone notices that but we really don't know what to do… We don't want to like, not invite him because we like his presence and bc he would probably feel bad, but he also doesn't seem to enjoy the places we like to go and what we usually like to do. Idk
No. 269624
>>269591I had something similar happen to me in middle school with this older boy on the bus, but back then I had no backbone so I just let it keep happening, even though I was uncomfortable with it.
I didn't want to be called a bitch or be told I was overreacting so I just kept letting him sit with me, and never told him to stop, or anything.
Once my sister called him out after seeing him grab my ass but he still kept it up because I let him. He only stopped once a friend of his girlfriend's friend saw, and tried to pass the whole blame on to me.
It was humiliating but I was glad he finally stopped, I was at the point where I was scared of riding the bus, and dreaded the end of the school day.
No. 269682
>>269611This reminds me of a girl friend I had
>Spoiled af>Constantly spoke about how sad, depressed she is…I mean constantly>No one else could talk about their problems cause she made it a contest>Tried to date and stalked almost every guy (even thought we asked her not to bother our close guy friends)>Despite knowing about my ED sent me thinspo and kept asking diet tips, later blamed me for her diet in front of friends>Whined about how her parents couldn't afford the best private therapist and only got 2nd best>Whined to everyone about her parents don't let her eat junk food and drink soda…still constantly did it just complained that she couldn't>My close friend died and she made it all about her, so she could get attention>Spread lies about friend in our group confessing to herPlus all weeb and kboo shit she did was so funny, I have so many stories of her.
No. 269738
>>269591>>269624i had a guy friend like this in high school. he was the ultimate beta orbiter, but had several girlfriends during the period we were friends, and STILL flirted with me/talked about wanting to date me. he was always pulling on me and grabbing at me in school, but no one did anything, they just stood on the sidelines and laughed, like i'd been contaminated by him. he sat by me on the bus every day and used to critique my appearance (even though i never asked him to), grabbed my hand and made me feel his boner,
and one day forced himself on me and robbed me of my first kiss. i was never able speak up because he acted like he was entitled to my body because he was nice to me.
but yeah guys like that suck. sorry you guys went through what you did.
No. 269741
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>>269169Hey, this is me, i dont think i have big boobs, my point was i have a completely proportional size for my height and frame (5’4, 105lbs, 14%bf) so i dont look like a child and even if i did, i was tired of taking her unnessescary insults all the time.
No. 269755
>>269738I'm sorry anon, that guy sounds disgusting. I literally don't get how these guys have girlfriends. They're probably unaware or the shuwu type tbh.
Also I've had dudes do the same thing w critiquing appearances. Like I love when unfashionable men that put nothing into their appearance try to critique me because they think I actually care about attracting them.
No. 269832
>>269291Are you me? I know this feel all too well anon. I'm so sorry that you put up with that when you are already struggling with your body image and self-concept. I understand that it might be difficult, but I hope that you can reach out to them and express how you are feeling. If they cannot be bothered or continue to put you down you should look elsewhere. Friendships should foster mutual growth and development. Please don't extend your pain for longer than you have to.
>friend circle in my late teens consisted largely of weebs and nerds>a number of tiny asian girls also in friend group>be me: hapa, measuring in at 174 cm and ~52-54 kg>was always insecure about my body and felt worthless overall>frequent "lol anon, you're too fat to really be asian" comments>"I would totally fuck your (then underage) sister anon. How did you end up so different looking?">frequent comments about being hideous and undesirable in general>"you're lucky that guy [who regularly manipulated, abused and later sexually harassed me] is interested in you because no one in their right mind would accept you as you are.">go shopping for gifts for a much larger friend, would insist that I be the one to try out potential purchases because among them I was the "closest in size">always using me as a foil to highlight how much smaller and cuter they were>would encourage me to go on diets and to lose weight that I should not have lost>generally a toxic environment to be in with a lot of bullying and "pulling others down to make oneself feel bigger" going onI ended up ghosting these people and cutting them out of my life completely once I moved away to start studying at university. Unfortunately, my unaddressed depression got much worse and I had developed full blown anorexia nervosa. I don't blame them for it - there were so many factors that lead to me getting sick - but the messages I internalized certainly didn't help (one of the reasons I wanted the weight down was so that I could "be safe" and not "let them win"). It's sad because I had made a very strong association with some of my hobbies (that I genuinely enjoyed) and that friend group, and so I dropped them entirely for many years. Even now, I find myself avoiding certain events and people because I am terrified of running into them. On the bright side, I was able to make new friends that treat me with respect and have my best interests at heart.
But one of the girls from that group was especially annoying. She was a near perfect embodiment of the "Princess in an Otaku Circle" phenomenon:
>huge weeb and fujoshi "but I can't be a weeaboo because I'm Chinese">insisted on acting like an anime character: forced loli desu voice, exaggerated facial expressions, over the top gesticulations>despite being relatively average looking, she was orbited by many of the guys in our friend circle because: "just leik muh animes">would regularly wear closet cosplay to college (we have college before uni here) >never shut up about how smol and delicate she was >"I'm soooo smol!">"waaaa this big, burly, guy just picked me up at a con and I couldn't do anything because I'm only like 39 kilos u guise!">"You're so lucky to have such a womanly figure anon, I'm such a ~*sticc*~ and I look like a literal primary school student tee hee.">was so cheap that when it came to baking a cake as a "birthday present" for a friend, she cut on every single ingredient she possibly could so that she could bring down the net cost>whined about wanting to have a career as an idoru, never studied>every get-together had to involve karaoke so that she could perform for us>generally acted like a petulant child and would have literal temper tantrums in which everyone was expected to drop everything and coddle her>"I'm so innocent - sex is icky uwu" made out at group meet ups on the regularLooking back, it was probably just a lack of maturity and general weeaboo behaviour on her part but when you throw borderline "mean girls style" group politics into the mix it was quite unbearable at the time. The girls were reluctant to call her out on her behaviour because she had a knack for turning the group against whomever she happened to single out and the guys never did anything because I suspect that neck beard thirst is one hell of a drug.
No. 269874
>>269769Thing is she had no real trauma
>>269690Lmao, true.
I'll add another few things she has done
>Everytime anything happens she posts about it on social media with a deep quote or essay about her feels>Took a selfie saying how she looks like kpop boy star and would like to be in Seoul>Posted a pic about how meeting Japanese people was her DREAM come true No. 269888
File: 1532078546940.png (1.06 MB, 790x855, 1531999614839.png)
I've got two friends quarreling with each other right now and they're both grating under my skin so fucking badly. Already I'm upset because they've destroyed my first adult friend circle with their bullshit immaturity. All of the other friends in the group splintered off, moved away, or I didn't bond well with some to continue a friendship independently. No more group parties. It's all gone. I'm effectively alone again yet still stuck in the awkward middle of their tizzy.
I mean hey, friendship-ending fights happen I suppose, but both try to act like the "bigger" persons but completely fail because they're passive-aggressive and petty. ie. Friend A will vaguepost on social media and Friend B will see it because she got a mutual social media add to spy on what A posts. Stupid, no? IT'S BEEN ALMOST A YEAR. Truth is neither of them can let go of each other despite all the hate and social media blocks. It's like watching someone not being able to let go of a toxic relationship because of the sunk emotional and financial costs.
The other day I got interrogated by friend A because she thought I and my boyfriend were taking time out of our day to screencap her vaguepostings and sending them to friend B.
I told her no, calmly.I should have said fuck her trust issues. Maybe if she doesn't want the risk of more than 200 people potentially going behind her back to friend B, then maybe she shouldn't post!
Can't tell her nothing though, despite being jobless, having no education, no car,and massive debt she thinks she knows better than most.
So that was fun, being questioned like I'm a conniving liar when she stirs up drama all by herself. She must automatically distrust me (although I feel both do at this point) because I didn't denounce B or "choose a side." Neither of them really did anything fucked to me beyond their usual bs and what I allowed. However, now they're attempting to manipulate me which I don't like.
I feel like friend B only meets up with me to talk shit about friend A,–I just let her vent–and also because she has this superficial ambition to prove she's the better friend. Deep down it feels disingenuous. I no longer trust either with anything personal. They've proved they're the types to reveal horrible secrets and confides when they're angry. Not that I think I'll ever cross them, but I don't want to risk getting hurt by them.
Friend A's hinted jabs at my one personal insecurity (weight) so I know if I ever get on her bad side that'll be the first thing she'll attack.
I'm just so angry at them both, and sad.
No. 269930
There's this girl in our friendship group who has had something against me for the longest time.
> first friend in our group I'm close to, she gets really possessive of that friend and guilt trips that friend into spending less time with me
> fast forward half a year, she says she's grown since then and is sorry
> does the exact same thing with my other friend but this friend is way more above it and doesn't listen to her, often notices how she treats me in secret
> is only nice to me around those friends but in private bitches about me and avoids me
> obsessed with copying everything I say and do, copies how I dress and do my makeup, tries to be like a second me yet seems to hate me
> as soon as other friends get suspicious of her and how she treats me, she is suddenly back around and talking to me and kissing up to me
> as soon as she feels the suspicion has dropped goes back to trying to act innocent
> leaves in rage as soon as anyone gives me any attention or compliments
> ask her if I'm a bother to her and that she doesn't have to pretend she likes me
> uwu don't be silly anon, of COURSE I like you
> can tell she's lying
> any time anything good happens or any time I have any success in life she feels the need to outdo me
> continues to be fake nice and play victim and often guilt trips the other friends whenever she doesn't get attention by claiming they hate her and that she's a bother but doesn't actually mean it, is just doing it for asspats
> treats the other friends like shit then excuses it by saying she can't help it she's insecure and that totally makes it ok
> friends are slowly starting to distance themselves from her but I have a feeling she'll come out with more excuses for it to try and get them to forgive her
I don't even have to intervene at this point because I'm certain that over time she's only going to destroy her own reputation and the others will call her out more and more for this behaviour, but the friends that do know about this say she's probably jealous of me for whatever reasons. I've also noticed as soon as I am close to anyone she's suddenly following them on social media and kissing up to them too, it's so weird.
There's been several times where she's accidentally shown to be bitchy around these friends including the particular ones that she puts a nice act on around, the only way I can describe how she manipulates people is she tries to be really fake nice and play victim but then when she slips out of that character she's very bitter and her tone changes completely
I've come to just accept that I should just continue to do my own thing and even if she tries to copy or outdo me or stir, she never succeeds and the others have started to see through it, and because I haven't retaliated or been bitchy back I'm not sinking to her level so may as well let her be spoilt.
We graduated high school years ago, it's so petty but I know she's probably just really insecure so I don't want to be horrible to her and I just quietly observe and get told these things and hope she grows out of it one day
I also know she's pretending to be friends with me because she knows the others in our group like me a lot and are close to me so she can't lie about me to them the way she did with the first friend
this is why I think when she has tried to cause drama it's backfired and she's suddenly crawled back to being EXTRA nice to me knowing the others have noticed
we are all 19 and 20 so this is high school drama to me and it's nice to get it out somewhere
I'll never know why she specifically does this with me but I know eventually she's going to get herself in trouble over it
No. 270011
>>269993She doesn't want you to be the cute skinny one yet she isn't willjng to lose weight herself. Chubbies and fatties are toxic that way, very rarely are they both happy with their weight and okay being friends with thin people without getting
triggered over them dieting successfully.
No. 270041
>>269993keep it up anon, she doesn't like that you're starting to look better and she isn't. i'm 5'1 and at my heaviest i was 143. pro tip, set your goal to 110 for maximum cuteness and overall health, and focus on maintaning the new weight. 1200 calories should be fine for you, i recommend that amount.
i mean, at least just keep up the good attitude and ignore her. she's mad you're doing something she can't, that's all. when i was fat i would do the same because it bothered me seeing already skinny people get skinnier, and it made me
triggered because i couldn't do it myself. turns out, you can, everyone can. its all about setting goals, sticking to them, and learning whats best for you. keep it up anon! you're on the good path, she isn't.
OH YEAH, and keep in mind you start losing water weight. so if you see a sudden weight gain in a few days, don't panic. its normal. its fine to fluctuate 1 or 2 lbs. sometimes we eat super salty or carby things and it happens, but it doesn't mean our weight loss isn't working. its just our bodies. also periods can make you gain weight too so don't be alarmed if your weight changes soon! don't tust the scale till its over.
No. 270063
this threads popped up at interesting time, im super close with my best friend but lately shes pissed me off so much and im slowly realising thats shes kind of awful, i want to talk to her about it but i know any thing i say to her she can spin around to be my fault.
Most of my issues with her are pretty long and deep, so ill just go with the easiest thing to explain. Ill show her something (like clothes, makeup etc that sort of thing) or she'll show me, we'll talk about how we want to get whatever it is a lot, she'll always be nice about how it will really suit me, then the next week she'll turn around and be like "ew you want that?… it wouldnt suit you, its ugly -etc" its so strange??? Lately its been with me changing hair colour or getting piercings, which is even weirder bc in those instances she made all the suggestions at first, and then when i talk about going to get it done shes again saying nooo dont it ill look awfull etc again?
Sometimes i think either she just isnt really listening and only realises when she actually looks at what im talking about later that she dosent like it. But wouldnt make sense as we bring these things up all time. I dont know… sometimes i think she changes her mind bc she dosnt like it when i look nice and get nice things… shes a very jealous type
I could go for hours about how much she bugs me, but its difficult bc i know she means well really, like i said i just know if i talk to her about it she will twist it around so im in the wrong. I dont have any other friends to vent to so all the tiny things add up
No. 270123
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Have a friend who complains about the most inane, inconsequential shit. I love her a lot when she's not bitching about stupid shit but that's becoming few and far between and I'm tired of the constant negativity. I've talked to her about it, too, and she admits that she has a temper/gets mad over nothing but nothing gets done about it.
No. 270125
Why are fat girls so entitled and bitchy? I use to be friends this one fat girl, didnt even distribute her fat good but kept insisting she was thicc uwu, would never shut up about her butt.the type to reblog a bunch of thinspo one day, next day randomly post pictures claiming she had a fat ass, etc, this bitches ass was flat, and even most skinny girls had better ratio than her
Anyway, I could've just wiped it off if all she did was insist she was some uwu curvy girl and totally not an obese landwhale to the point of building her identity around it, but she was the type to always shit on other girls bodies, to the point where she wouldn't even be able to tell a story without mentioning how the girls butt was small or she was too skinny or whatever, the funny part is, 99% of the girls who she claimed were curveless were curvier or had a bigger but than she did, its like she thought any girl who wasnt as fat as her was a 12 yr old boy
Which also mildly bothered me is she stank so much and didnt even care, even people at school would gossip about how she stank so badly, she's literally made people vomit before from her smell, and she thinks its hot to not wear underwear so the smell was even more disgusting, and she use to brag about getting clymidia and how she made her boyfriend smell like a rotting vomit covered yeast infection, almost any fat girl I've ever been friends with are almost always shit people
No. 270132
>>270125>>270126I wonder if other farmers on this website are all secret fatties then, considering how many times bodies are nitpicked and shit on here.
Sorry but you both sound bitter.
No. 270143
>>270126I'd say it's the opposite: being 'thicc' is not a thing there I'm from, so most heavier girls are insecure and shy. And most of them try to make up for this by being really friendly and sweet to everybody.
Feeling and being perceived as ugly all your life won't result in entitlement, rather low self esteem. Maybe they secretly are bitter about their appearance, but most know that in order to be liked, they can't depend on their looks like others and therefore actually try to be a good person.
When I was a young teen I was very superficial, but now I noticed that most overweight people are super fun to be around.
No. 270171
>>270143I have the same experience where I live. My best friend is fat and she's a total sweetie personality wise, and loads of fun to be around. She's going to get married next year as well to a guy whose fit looking and would probably be considered "too handsome" for her, but they're very cute together.
Not going to dismiss people's negative experiences with fat people, though.
Back on topic: I had one friend a few years ago who, after finding out that I lost a family member to suicide when I was younger, began to say stuff like "maybe I should just kill myself, then, like your (…) did!" whenever we had an argument or even slightly disagreed on something.
She would also bring it up in conversation with other people like this random fun fact about me, or if someone mentioned suicide she would turn towards me with a very knowing look. Once we were watching a movie with some friends at a sleepover where a character in the movie committed suicide. My friend chuckled and asked if it reminded me of someone, and then kept whining that we had to turn the movie off because she was suddenly afraid that I would start crying.
We were both teenagers at the time and I was too shy and naive to understand what she was up to. Eventually we moved on to different schools and I haven't seen her since.
No. 270306
>>270142>have limited experiences with a couple of fatties>all fatties are that wayYeah, you're not the beacon of logic here. Your experiences are fine but it gets annoying when you extrapolate them to fit your anti-fatty whining.
Sucks that you were bullied.
>>270182I don't think you understood what I was getting at. It wasn't to accuse everyone of being fat, it was saying that clearly girls of all different body types can be shitty, not just fatties, and especially so because of what you mentioned.
No. 270397
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I have two ex-friends that are worth talking about and even worthy of their own threads, but I'm not going into detail cause I'm like 99.9% sure they both use this site.
No. 270408
>>270397that will just come off as vendetta regardless if they use the site or not. so youll probably get shit for it either way.
I always get that random friend who doesn't talk to me for months, but then messages me out of the blue rambling their life story as if I'm a therapist. Never mind the fact they ignored my existence for so long and now suddenly I'm supposed to be here for you.
No. 270441
>>270408Same anon from above, and yes everything you said is true. I'd rather not do that and just keep the cringe memories to myself lol.
Also I can relate to people ignoring me for periods and then popping up out of the blue when they need something. Not even to vent though, just using me for material gain. Or they come across something that reminds them of me and they decide to randomly message me about it like everything was okay. Someone who hadn't talked to me in years messaged me asking if they could use me as a reference/referral for work? She didn't even bother to say hi, or wanna chat and catch up first, she just wanted to see if I could help her get a job.
No. 270501
>>270441>>270408People like this deserve nothing. Not even a "no lol Fuck you," just drop them
I had an old friend message me once asking me to help them find drugs. I was sober by this point. Incredibly rude. I couldn't even be angry just…embarrassed for them.
No. 270590
File: 1532254084655.gif (458.99 KB, 384x288, sad-reaction-gif-4.gif)
I feel like I never had real friends, all of them always treated me like shit.
When I was 11 I clung to a group that always excluded me: didn't allow me to room with them, didn't give me their numbers, wanted to teach me how to be "cool". One wrote me a letter, telling me that she actually doesn't like me, then I cried and she pretended everything was just a joke.
When I was 15 I had different friends, we were kind of the "losers" in class. Then she was allowed to spend a gap year in New Zealand. When she came back, all the other kids were interested in her and suddenly I was no longer good enough.
After graduating 2 of my friends spend a year abroad. Beforehand we already planned that we're going to visit each other. But suddenly friend A visits friend B - without telling us others. They said they didn't know that we wanted to go as well, which was bullshit.
B then visited her boyfriend in Mexico; while being there she didn't message anyone but A for weeks, so we decided that we're going to do the same for her. A and B then tell us that we're no longer friends. Somehow it's okay if they do it, but not if it's us.
I apologized and nearly begged that we meet up again.
A year later we gift B a day trip. All of us had over 2 months summer holidays, but none of them had time to go. Instead the two of them went on a trip to Italy together without telling us again.
During the 2nd half of our off time I got a job. Then suddenly A and B want to take the trip on a day I have to work. I tell them that I have to go there, since it's a new job blah blah, but they didn't care.
I always tell my mum everything. She then told me exactly what to write and that pissed them off so much that I haven't seen B for 2 years now. She didn't even give me her new number.
During our last years in school we spend every single minute together and she wasn't even shitty to me before… I also kind of feel guilty, since I already was friends with A since kindergarten and then threw her away when I was 11 to be with the 'cooler' group who I ranted about above and now she's done the same with me. (I apologized and asked if she still has a grudge against me because of that, but she denied.)
Now I have the 2 friends from school (the ones who also didn't go abroad) and 5 friends who live very far away from me left.
All of them never write or visit, it's always me who has to initiate everything. The ones who live far away are too lazy and stingy to travel to meet up and my old friends somehow also never have time despite living less than half an hour away.
The saddest thing is, that most of the don't even text me for my birthday.
Sometimes I think of just never messaging them again and see if they'd do something, but then I wouldn't have a single friend left.
I'm also too shy (and ugly) to date, so I'm thankful to at least have such a lovely mother - otherwise I'd be completely alone. She always warned me beforehand, but I never believed her until it was already too late nd I got hurt again.
I just wish I never "broke up" with A as a kid, maybe everything would have turned out differently then…
No. 270754
File: 1532296588193.jpg (59.16 KB, 736x825, 2b896e624ab30c6a9551852dadf68d…)
I'm 22 years old with 0 friends. Anyone that I've ever considered a good friend didn't make an effort to stay in contact with me (even if I did), and if they did stick around they abused me (emotionally, verbally, sexually, financially, etc).
Elementary school, I'm an annoying pariah. Hang out with other kids a lot, but I never have a best friend. I move away and lose track of the one genuine girl I had a connection with.
Middle school and high school, I become quiet and introverted. Establish a solid group of friends. Later realize my female bestie is an overly critical narcissist, my remaining female friends were fair-weather friends (who eventually ceased contact with me), and my male friends were just sticking around in case I let them get in my pants.
College. Lonely. I'm coerced into dating my last remaining (male) best friend, then get dumped. Make new friends shortly after. We form a sisterly bond. Then they all end up abandoning me or abusing me.
I'm about to (finally) graduate from uni this fall, and I'm terrified of what the rest of my life is going to be like without friends. The closest thing I have to a friend is my serious boyfriend of 3 years. He's great, but I hate being clingy and prefer to give him space, plus he has friends of his own. In general I have an extremely hard time relating to people and opening up to them, because I've felt abnormal my whole life. And now I feel like I can't even maintain friendships, so I'm afraid to begin new ones. Honestly I'm starting to feel like I'm just a toxic human and I deserve to not have any friends.
No. 270763
Okay this might be long and complicated but I'm really annoyed how almost a decade long group friendship is being ruined for no actual reason.
A summary of my friend group:
>Be in a group of 4 friends
>2 male - Lets call them J and E and 2 female - L and me
>We've known and hung out with each other since 1st/2nd year of high school (we are currently 24/25)
>Our friendship persisted even when we went to different universities in different cities
>Our group wasn't "exclusive", we'd invite other friends and boyfriends/girlfriends at the time to hang with us too
>It's just that 4 of us always stayed consistently in friendship with each other over the years.
>Almost 1 year ago, J gets a new girlfriend
>She's good friends with L, we all know she's chill
>J is basically glued to her,constantly makes her be with him
>He stops replying and showing up when we want to meet as a group
>If he does come, it's for a very short time with his gf and then he takes her some place else
>Yet at the same time, he makes plans to hang out with E, brings his gf with him every time, doesn't tell the rest of us
>Makes it look like he just made it in the last minute and didn't have time to call L and me.
>Our "annual events" like Eurovision watching party get ruined because he pulls the same shit. First he says he won't be able to make it, then when the plan was cancelled- he shows up at E's house with his gf and tells him to keep it a secret from us.
>E tells us anyway because it's weird to him too. Also tells us that he tends to show up at his place unannounced- again with his gf.
>L asks gf (her friend) what's up with that and she says that he makes it seem like just of two of them will go somewhere, then after their date is done he takes her to E's place to hang out. (his gf doesn't really care about hanging with E, she just goes with the flow)
>wtf
>We confront him about it, ask him if he has some kind of a problem with us?
>He just repeats same excuses, obviously dishonest.
>E makes excuses for him, he says that he's "autistic" (he isn't) and doesn't think things through.
>Our friend group that lasted for almost a decade is dead because of this.
Feels shitty man. I remain good friend with L (other female in our group) but that's about it. While J pulls up this stupid shit for reasons he won't tell, E excuses him without realizing J is using him too (showing up unannounced at his house w/ gf at like 11 PM because he feels like it, even when E has work early in the morning).
It's such a weird situation overall, nobody was aware he was like this and we still don't know what the hell is his problem…
No. 270766
>>270754anon, you deserve friends. it’s ok to not have a huge circle, but having a couple of stable individuals in your life that you can rely on can really help. however, you’re making it harder on yourself by saying things like you don’t deserve friends. putting yourself down only serves to make yourself feel more abnormal as you put it.
i know you’re just an anon and this is just one post, but honestly you don’t sound abnormal to me, you sound like myself and a lot of other people i’ve managed to befriend. if you really think you’re a toxic person, you gotta work to identify what behaviours of yours are toxic and try your best to turn them around. you seem very aware of yourself, use that to your advantage to try and identify (but not overthink) areas you can push yourself a little bit more to try and find a pal. as far as hurtful and toxic people go, use those past experiences as identifying markers when you meet potential new friends. if they display the same red flags as those previous bad people, abort mission. don’t feel bad about cutting someone off if they’re deliberately hurting you.
this might all sound like bullshit to you but i believe you’re more than capable and deserving of friendship, anon. don’t punish yourself, encourage yourself.
No. 270788
>>270766Bleh, that last part of me saying saying I don't deserve friends was just me overreacting. I was being too hard on myself, but I do think I deserve friends. I just noticed a trend, which is that people I get close to end up drawing away from me, and if they stick around it's cause they want to use me for something (someone to listen to them vent, mooching off me for money/car rides, sex, etc.). But like you said, if there's any toxic behaviors I have then I need to identify them and work on them (without beating myself up of course). I've been hurt, so I know what to look out for. But I know I'm not a perfect person either, so there's stuff I can work on myself.
Thank you for your advice, anon. I was worried I'd get some responses like "oh you sound like a pain in the ass no wonder you don't have friends", but you have a hopeful solution my problem and I'll take everything you said into consideration.
No. 270898
>Meet a person who seems really nice and cool, develop a friendship
>Over time she starts exhibiting some attention whorish traits and I hate myself for not seeing all the red flags in time
>Her behavior gets worse over time
>She belittles me, makes fun of the stuff I like, jokes on my behalf, voices her dislike about the stuff that I hold dear to myself
>If I get my feelings hurt, she starts crying about how she feels bad for hurting me, the situation ends up with me having to comfort her
>She absolutely doesn't care about my feelings or what's going on in my life, she might go on a 3-hour monologue only talking about herself and never once asking for my input or never being interested in how I'm doing
>She's paranoid about people hating her, completely makes up shit to get mad over and burns bridges like they were firewood
>She mocks my friends but gets her precious feelings hurt over the smallest things despite being a mean-spirited banshee herself living off of hurting people
>You can never trust her version of the story because it's often embellished and exaggerated as hell, often portraying herself as the innocent victim of a mob
>If I'm feeling sad or depressed she GETS MAD AT ME because she needs to be 100% in control all the time and can't stand the thought of me going through something beyond her reach
>If I confront her about all this shit, she threatens with suicide or self-harm
The worst thing is that for some reason I attract these people like honey. I guess I'm too much of a doormat and easy to exploit.
No. 270925
File: 1532342856555.png (98.38 KB, 302x187, 205AE4B8-A906-4236-8FB2-DE7E72…)
Not awful, but this has been driving me crazy of late.
>Be me, not from fantastic background but trying to make things work
>I moved out of home at 18
>Worked very hard to get out of the sticks and live near the city centre and finally do it
I have been talking about doing this the entire time I was a teenager, especially to best friend. My best friend is someone I have known for years and years, we have some differences but always stuck together. It started as she would never be receptive to anything I said she wasn’t 100% comfortable with eg: feelings, moving away from hometown, she would just go quiet and change the subject ASAP
I kinda grew to accept this as her family are EXTREMELY stubborn and always put her down if she ever expressed doing something out of the norm, super manipulative
I always try to encourage her to be true to herself and not let them control her. kinda works, but she still lets it happen
>fast forward
>we are both the same age, different situations
> I have gone through several jobs, job market is fickle and awful in city area so it’s been tough getting a new one
>I live with housemates and am mostly completely independent
>best friend has steady work, always gets shifts
>recently moved out to live with extended family rather than her guardians
>constantly complaining
>CONSTANTLY
>she cries every day because she’s not with her guardians; despite the fact she lives literally 1 minute away and goes shopping with them every week
>her bosses and coworkers love her, let her get away with almost anything and she’s always talkig about it
>Cannot take a day off to visit me, makes up excuses
>tells me she can’t come to my birthday party because she can’t afford the petrol
>lies and tells my mother something else which I find out
>she then tells me both of the reasons she told us both applied
>I offer to pay for gas; no dice
>I offer to pay for her booze, gas, anything she needs (reminder: I’m jobless, she isn’t)
>still no dice, she just pretends I never said anything
>next day, proudly brags in group chat how she bought a brand new limited edition version of a console
>other friend is onto her shit and can see what’s going on, tries to call her out but she just ignores anything she doesn’t like and changes the subject
Before all this happened, she constantly guilted me and bitched to others that I never went to visit her, despite my constant offers to make plans. She just keeps complaining about how lonely she is and how much she misses me but won’t ever do anything. She refuses to go further than her hometown, continues to let herself be manipulated by her family, and no matter how much it’s pointed out to her she continues the “if I pretend it’s not there, it’s not actually happening” act.
What the fuck am I supposed to do?
No. 271075
I have a longtime "close" friend which makes it complicated to try and cut her off.
>friend is fat, so this whole thread is relatable
>she thinks people should love people even if they're fat/find out that they're fat (her tinder is myspace angle selfies)
>wants husband & kids but w/o losing weight (she could make it easier on herself if she did…)
>complains about job/living situation but spends money on: multiple movie trips to the same movie (w/ concessions), constant fast food, soda, makeup that she never puts on)
>also w/ living situation: she's a huge cunt to her parents & thinks its funny when they get mad, OR she throws a fit if she gets in bigger trouble for being a cunt. She's also a cunt to min wage workers even tho she is one herself (& is a cunt to customers and coworkers) and was amazed that a receptionist was an asshole right back to her. Bitch you had it coming.
>again w/ the fast food - doesn't let me cook for us, insists on making me eat this shit every time we hang out bc she'll pay for it (and again with the overspending…)
>complains all about her problems without asking me how I'm doing
>comes to my house unannounced crying about these problems even though I'm obviously trying to get shit done & after she's done crying she wants to get fast food and watch TV. Pisses me off bc I'm not constantly fucking available for her bullshit that she caused herself.
>proceeds to judge and make fun of my cleaning/organizing habits around the house bc she doesn't do shit
I had this rant in me for weeks and it's a huge mess but fuck it's hard to cut someone off when they just come to your fucking house expecting free therapy. I never host friends any more because I don't want them to know where I live in case they think this shit is ok. I wish my fat friend was the kind who made up for their sheer girth with a sweet personality, but no, she's a fat, rude, piece of shit.
No. 271100
File: 1532375475829.jpg (62.91 KB, 933x597, DXVCy_FV4AAFG0F.jpg)
anons, have you ever felt like you and your friend(s) are growing apart?
a few weeks ago i visited one of my close friends and came to the realization that she is acting like an embarrassing and immature middle schooler, even though she is almost 24 years old:
>still hung up on the guy she dated during high school
>begs said guy to hide his location on apps like sc so she doesn't stalk him
>finds out he is seeing another girl
>has an emotional breakdown while talking to him
>tries to guilt trip him
>success
>he apologizes to her for his behavior
she is just, so fucking embarrassing. we randomly met some guys from high school at a party and it was fascinating seeing her have a conversation with them. she would constantly talk about herself and her ex. it's obvious that she is emotionally and mentally unstable, but doesn't seek help (healthcare is free in our country) even though i've told her to do so numerous times.
i don't know how to feel about her, to be honest. we have been friends for 12 years, and she was always the pretty and popular one in middle school and high school. but after we graduated she has gained a shit ton of weight and looks awful. she craves male attention and is constantly surrounded by pathetic beta orbiters. she doesn't go to school either, but plans to start next year.
after high school i did my best to sort out my mental issues, started taking care of myself and lost a lot of weight. i changed up my style and improved my makeup skills. i also started caring more about others and taking an interest in their lives.
sorry for the humble bragging, kek, but my point is that while i worked hard on improving myself, she did the opposite. the result of this is that i am the pretty and successful one who others like, while she is the ugly and socially inept one.
i don't know if i should keep being her friend and do my best to push her into improving herself, or just drop her. i still care about her, but sometimes her behavior is just too much.
No. 271194
File: 1532403039528.png (280.48 KB, 448x548, myfacewhen.png)
>nerdy male friend I rejected years ago
>talks about his gf to friends specially me all the time
>his first serious relationship
>shows me pics of her and his gifts to her every fucking time
>was looking for RPG things to gift him on his bday but 'she's already gonna give me those'
>getting meaner probably bcuz he's dating now
Sometimes I think he's unexperienced and wants to brag a little but most times it feels like he's trying to rub in my face 'look I got myself a gf while you're still single'. It's driving me crazy how he treats his gf like a literal goddess and then proceeds to act like an ogre towards me. I really just wish he treated me with the some respect since we know each other since HS and I've been nothing but a great friend all these years. Also, I find it weird when he says he's a submissive guy, wants women to rule the world/society and yet is always kind of agressive? I might be expecting too much from a male, after all.
I've posted the same thing in the Vent Thread as I didn't knew about this one. I think it fits here better.
No. 271756
I have a friend who is a uwu I'm so smol n cute and sub.
>constantly talks about how she is so short and small and can't reach anything, and how life is so hard for shorties like us (I'm 5'2, she is 5'7. How is that short, and how the fuck are we the same height?)
>Talks about how she is so weak uwu and can't lift anything, and that she needs those tall strong boys to lift thing for her
>actually unironically uses uwu speak and anime tropes (such a tsundere)
>stopped being ftm for a guy she unrequitedly was in love with just because he was asian and forced him to date her (still obsessed over him a year later)
>Is a handmaiden, acts like a housewife for our guy friends and her tumblr is full of anti-feminism and mra.
>same guys told me that they find it weird and that thank god I have a spine and isn't like that kek
>constantly talks about her orbiters, even though they don't actually orbit her, just tolerate her.
>wants to talk about how she weighs so much less than me and how she starves herself, to me, a recovered anorexic
>also wants to talk to me about how she cuts her self because she is such a masochistic sub, to me, a recovered self harmer
Good to get that off my chest.
No. 271788
>>271756 5'7 small?? what the fck
Your friend could be considered tall in many countries
She's weird
No. 271821
>>271756first, why are you even friends with her. cut her off
second, how did she force the poor guy to date her? did she blackmail him or what?
No. 271825
>>271821Well I guess not forced, she just pestered him until he gave in and tried dating her.
I don't have many friends so I don't want to cut anyone off. Especially since all my friends are mutual friends with her, and it would definitely bite me in the ass. She is fairly harmless I guess, just annoying as shit with her "not like the other girls" shtick.
No. 271837
>>271756>5'7">short and weakHAHA HOLY SHIT. I'm an inch shorter than her and taller/stronger than most women I know.
She sounds shitty, are there any good points at all?
No. 271934
Last year I moved 30min outside of town and as soon as I said I was moving my friends told me straight up they wouldn't visit me. It's not like I live in the sticks, there's a cute, lively downtown area nearby with lots of shops and restaurants, also a lake with falls and hiking trails. There's plenty of shit to do besides sitting around (even though sitting around at someone's house is what we always do together). Hell, there's more to do out here than there is near their homes.
I would be more understanding if they didn't drive to the nearest metro area every other weekend. It's about the same distance (22min vs 28min) but for some reason whenever I suggest doing something at my place there's this uncomfortable silence like someone just made a really off-color joke. We've had an annual meteor shower party since high school and I volunteered to host last year because I'm the only one with a yard, but it was the same vague maybe's they always give and in the end, they just cancelled it. We missed stargazing for the first time in almost 10 years.
It's also the same sort of situation as
>>270763 so I can't tell if they hate me or they're just lazy or have more fun when it's just the three of them? I don't know. I was already feeling isolated before I moved and but now I really am completely cut off.
No. 271970
>>271957Nah, PNW.
But yeah, it's the same imbalance. I don't have a car, so getting to them is a 2hr hike+bus ride, which I've made several times so far for them. If they wanna say a 30min drive is exhausting I don't buy it.
No. 272216
>one of those "genderfluid" people because she has long hair and doesn't wear makeup, has a very feminine body but she's obsessed with appearing masculine
>the other day asked me if i was using "they" pronouns for her when i was just speaking really fast and i wasn't even referring to her
>most likely has borderline personality disorder
>obsessed with guys being attracted to her
>claims to like "not conventionally attractive" guys but all the guys she likes are tall, aesthetically very attractive, girls chase them like crazy, etc
>wears fucking booty shorts then gets angry that people comment on it or being able to see her ass
>has to inject herself into absolutely everything, constantly needs validation that she's special and unique
>insecure as fuck and knows it and does nothing about it, she lets aforementioned guys treat her like shit
>claims to be asexual but is on tinder, masturbates a lot, watches cartoon porn
>messy. every time she leaves my house, there is a fucking mess.
thankfully even after all of that there are still positives… i see a lot of people who have friends who shit on them a lot but she doesn't really do that to me. i just hate how not self aware she is. i have other friends anyway, but i wish it was easier nowadays in the usa to find female friends who aren't mentally ill sjws who have "I'm Special" Syndrome.
No. 272233
>>271837I was going to say yes, but she just reblogged something I reblogged about partner rape from someone else with an added comment about how it is just an agenda for feminism.
Knowing that I have been raped in abusive relationships several times. Being a handmaiden knows no limits, I guess.
No. 275149
File: 1533204933033.png (157.89 KB, 640x360, raw.png)
>male friend
>depress and hikky as fuck
>is on medication but it's apparently not helping
>whines all the time about not having a gf
>like literally all the time
>says getting a gf would cure his depression
>re-downloads and deletes tinder every month
>tried telling him that these things happen at their own pace
>"ok so i'm never getting laid" "i'm already late with my chances" "i should've started dating and partying when i was younger"
>doesn't leave the house a lot so not a lot of chances to meet any women
>whines about how he only knows anything about video games or gaming and he's never getting a gf because but doesn't seemingly want to improve himself in anything
The worst part is that he deems me to be perfect wife material and compares every girl she tries to hit it off with to me. He even went as far at some point to question me if I truly love my bf because "I've never hear you say it out loud", at which point I got fucking pissed with him. He's a nice friend and all but I don't know what to tell him to make him realise relationships just don't happen overnight, and the constant twfnogf-depresso is also dragging me down on top of my other problems. Though now he hasn't been talking to me for a week, idk if he's trying to take distance.
No. 275156
File: 1533205665679.jpeg (131.96 KB, 750x789, 76564B7C-E4FA-4147-8FC8-AF360D…)
>>273982>people think she's my mom when we hang outKek
No. 275261
File: 1533226107871.jpg (22.9 KB, 670x503, 1497191050917.jpg)
>gave up on having friends irl hence don't have to cope with retards and people judging me every minute we spend together
I have a lot of stories that led me in this decision but I would rather not remember anything in detail.
No. 275308
File: 1533235707280.png (272.7 KB, 545x594, 1483402762874.png)
I am an artist in one fanbase, so it's related to discord and twitter.
>makes vector art, at some point created alt account going around as a fan of guy's stuff
>start DMing me from his alt, giving me a fake info where he comes from etc
>at some point talks with himself from two accounts in main chat
>keeps lying when I prove him about his alt
>finally admits it but once you remind him of it he goes "but I apologized"
>even if he knows I am gay he starts asking me whan my gf has that he doesn't
>always plays a victim
>posts on fb a "revenge" from job where we gives another guy fibre glass to wipe his hands
>says he wants to "destroy some people from group for good"
>DMs people asking why they like friend so much then a list of everything he see wrong with friend
>openly says to people he needs to learn how to better manipulate
Softblocked him today, right after got a message /"nice!
did I do something to offend you yourself this time?"/
>starts accusing your friend that they told you to block him, like you have no mind nor reasons of your own
Wish I could fully get rid of this guy from my life, he's so toxic and he's aware of that, yet plays victim.
No. 279414
File: 1534089733898.gif (1.96 MB, 540x304, yep.gif)
Anyone else have a generally good-natured friend that is really stupid to the point of it being obnoxious?
I can't do or plan anything with this friend without low key micromanaging because if she's left to her own devices, she fucks shit up.
She's really fucking dumb and sometimes dangerous.
Examples:
I refuse to let her drive us anywhere because when she drives she looks at her phone and/or holds the wheel with one hand as she swerves all over the road. I prefer to drive us for this reason, and lately her air conditioning is busted so that's given me a great excuse to drive instead.
The other night we had a cooking date with a group of our friends. I asked her to boil something, but when she went to the gas range she must not have known how to light because she left it clicking as un-ignited gas leaked out! We all had to scramble over to turn it off because she didn't know it would explode.
She also caused me to throw away leftover seafood. We asked her to help put away leftovers. She refrigerated chopped vegetables, yet decided to just wrap the uncooked seafood in tinfoil and stuff it in the take home tote. I didn't realize what she'd done until an hour later.
There's also this thing she does when she wants to binge hanging out with our friend group. We'll have this big day together like going to a theme park, concert, road trip, etc. and the very next day she wants to hang out again. Everyone in the group knows we're tired and that we all need a break from each other, but this friend insists she wants us to have a shopping day or something immediately after. The very next day, she always cancels because surprise, she's always too tired. Which is why we just let her cancel instead of squashing her enthusiasm at the get go.
You'd just think she'd realize that never works out.
Also she has an iconic tic where she does a giggle after saying something. It's just something she does regardless if what she said is actually funny even in an ironic way. She's like a cartoon character, and also a massive weeb.
Anyway, she's really nice and all that but basically nobody trusts her to do anything correctly. Even if she's shown how to do something it's like the information is only partially absorbed. We'd never want to make her feel like a dumbass because she does have good intentions, but we do have to have a lot of patience.
No. 279425
>>279416Is there much to do at your place?
I live in an apartment, and while it's clean and isn't ugly, there isn't much room and not much to do besides stream or play video games.
I don't even really like hosting parties solely for the lack of space. Are you sure it's just about them wanting fuck randoms?
No. 279435
>>279419Nah it's fairly nice.
>>279425See, I'd wonder if it was a problem with my place if it weren't for the fact that I have two other groups of friends who love coming around to my place. It's just this one group that always flake. I have big speakers in the kitchen and we make cocktails or food while listening to music, there's a projector in the sitting room so people usually end up casting videos or playing games and I've a pretty big outdoor area so on a nice day we sit outside or people can have a smoke. A few always end up sleeping on the couch too. It's just kind of hurtful that they can't make the effort when it's my birthday, idc about the rest of the year.
No. 279443
>>279435Oh then yeah it's probably that they just prefer the clubbing scene. Don't go out of your way for them, sounds like you've got better friends.
Happy birthday!
No. 279503
File: 1534108600371.jpg (147.3 KB, 1280x720, maxresdefault.jpg)
my best friend is fucking obsessed with BTS. You would think she will have gotten over it as time passed, but NO.
Since fucking 2014 she would come to school with a video downloaded in her phone of their dance practices and made me hear some songs, but since now they are apparently quite big she has gotten worse.
Every time we hang out she would show us pics of them, making us seeing their videos, listen to their songs, talks about them nonstop etc. Even in the group chat, she would send some random pic of some kpop dude and asking us if he is cute, we started ignoring her: she got big mad but stopped doing it.
I even started liking some song of them but is quite hard to appreciate them when she is shoving kpop down our throats, I think I hate kpop, I hate BTS and I hate that Jimin dude she doesn't shut up about it, I even check from time to time the kpop hate thread now. I feel infected with a disease just knowing way too much about this whole subject.
idk how to address this without making her feel like we don't care about the things she likes
No. 280302
Known her since college, been living together for a few years.
>help her get job in distant city (find listing, proof her resume/cover letter, etc)
>move w/ her to distant city (was planning on it anyway, but didn't have job lined up at the time)
>work several shit jobs over a period of 1.5 years
>she loafs off at work, refuses to network
>finally I get kickass job, working a trillion hours but super happy in it
>roll from that kickass job to new kickass job
>she decides she wants to leave shit job
>thru networking I get 2 job offers for her, good positions, not her dream job but plenty of opportunity to move around
>have 2 backup interviews/options for her
>she turns down both offers to go work another dead end job for a vidja company
>again loafs
>she gets transfer and promotion and permanent position w/in other department after a few months
>now travelling, work phone, etc, and she loves to humblebrag
>after 1.5 years I get unexpectedly laid off
>she can't lift a finger to help me find anything, won't even try
>"oh you'll get something, keep your head up"
It's not like I'm expecting that much help, but to not even have her like pretend to help me fucking hurts.
No. 280303
>>279503I feel for you except I managed to help my friend get over BTS and get her shit together with me at the same time bc they were clearly effecting our lives negatively.
Tell her to wake the fuck up. Make her realize things it's hard for brainwashed fans to realize overtime.
I still have another friend just like yours who hates coming into our gc anymore bc each time BTS drops something we criticize them most of the time (bc their recent releases have been shit) and armys can't handle that for some reason. She lit told us she'd drop us if we didn't stop "hating" on BTS, and she's the only one who doesn't hear how fucking stupid she sounds.
No. 281096
File: 1534419902233.jpg (69.8 KB, 1188x673, embarressed.jpg)
>>273982> one day she went to McDonald's twice and got a full menu everytime to be fair I would totally do this
but I'm not fat because i watch my intake the rest of the time so…
No. 285769
>>285740That sounds super annoying anon.
If you told her about not posting about you a while ago, then maybe it just slipped her mind. Mention it to her again and ask her to delete any pictures of you.
If she tells you it's not a big deal or refuses to then she clearly doesn't respect you or your boundaries and you should cut her out of your life. As for the pictures in this case, you can untag yourself in them or report them to Facebook because they are pics of you that you didn't consent to be shared.
No. 285867
>>285769I told her not long ago, because we were on holidays and she was spending her time taking pictures (fair enough, me too) and posting everything we were doing with great details on fb. I told her that she could do what she wants as long as she's not posting pictures of me or taking pictures of me without telling me and she didn't until we went back to our city so I guess she thought it was temporary now that I think about it, but she stills hides my face so idk. I'll tell her again because this is getting ridiculous. The picture she took and posted was taken when I had no idea she was taking photos.
She's the type of person who will see something online, think about someone she knows, and instead of sending a private message to say "oh look at this, it reminded me of you :D" she'll post it for everyone to see and tag the person, then expect the person to actually discuss everything in the not so private comments. She's really nice and all that but she's doesn't understand that I don't like fb at all.
Quick question because I'm always a bit confused, if I untag myself, the picture will still be in her post? It's just that it won't appear on my page, right?
No. 287660
>>287604Would you tell someone with anorexia to just fucking eat something and expect it to solve the problem?
The only thing she needs is a therapist and more supportive friends. Don't you have any other friends who might entertain your success story? Give that friend some space and don't be so insensitive to her problem just because she's le fat.
No. 289133
File: 1535863868166.png (20.12 KB, 194x107, Screen Shot 2018-09-01 at 11.4…)
i guess this chick is my friend? i had to room with her all summer and she is annoying af. i think she is a thoughtful and sweet person but she is thoughtful in the wrong way leading her to say shit like this.
like how the fuck is football a "white space?" yeah it's not like there are plenty of black and Hispanic players. also no one wants to have a conversation at a fucking football game, just go somewhere else and stop acting oppressed.
No. 293090
>Doesn't take care of her
>Doesn't care about her appearance
("They're gonna take me like how I am!!! Looks are not important!" which is true but she doesn't do anything to emphatise her natural beauty, imagine someone who wears sweatpants even for going out)
>Cuts her hair really short so she doesn't have to comb it in the morning
>Looking like a butch lesbian
>Doesnt go out, every night stays at home watching some shit on netflix
>"Pugs before hugs uwu"
>She turns men down because "they only want to fuck me"
> Awkward body language, talking in meme language irl, having rupaul's drag race humor
>"Anon, why can't I find a guy??? :( I don't want to download a dating app, only perverts do that!"
Idk, maybe go out, talk to people, and look like you care about yourself?
No one, male or female, wants to go out with a person who is always in "home comfy clothes" mode, speaks of literally two topics, turns people down on the first sentence and always says stupid shit like "My ideal man is my dog" holy fuck
No. 294859
>>289133That’s fucking obnoxious. Homophobia and racism suck but I wish these people would realize that just because you’re gay and/or a POC doesn’t automatically make you a better or more interesting person.
Also white thing? Wtf? A lot of football fans are minorities (especially among black people).
No. 294933
>>293107This was college football. But looking at the football roster I see plenty of black people.
https://thesundevils.com/roster.aspx?path=football>>294859Basically everyone in my summer program including her thought that being a queer POC makes you the greatest. It was so frustrating. Everyone else in our group liked the picture but only I was like wtf.
No. 295702
This story probably is petty and overly long but I really need to vent.
I made several friends a year and a half ago by playing Overwatch, and we were tightly knit. One of them in particular, let's call her Amy, we got along particulary well, I helped her through rough times, and vice versa.
Her, I and some others from the group met up IRL at a con in her city in March and it was amazing; I stayed at her place for a few days and we had great fun. We met up with who she considered her best guy friend, and she was very disappointed since he acted very cold and distant, I spent a day cheering her up, but otherwise it was amazing for a meet up with online friends.
Since there was a big con near my place in July, I invited her to stay for a few days around it and she accepted.
First day, she arrives, and we have a good time. She had started dating a guy a month before, they had never met IRL. She keeps messaging him as I'm showing her around the city, it bugs me a little, but eh.
Second day, we meet up with her boyfriend and two of her friends at a bar. I know one of them, he's super cool, but the other has a tendency to say some pretty nasty things while passing it as humor. Amy and her bf spend their time glued to each other's mouth, everyone around us is staring, it's embarrassing as hell but hey, I figure it's their first IRL meeting and it's important so I don't say anything. Her assholish friend nicely drops us at my place, and I'm thankful to have the front seat because Amy and her bf are still making out in the back of the car the whole trip, right next to our poor mutual friend.
Third day, it's con day. Amy and I are there when it opens, but she wants to wait for her bf- I say we should tour the con a bit while waiting inside. I'm glad she accepted, because he and the two other guys were over 3 hours late. During those 3 hours, Amy has spent a lot of time texting him instead of enjoying the con.
When the three guys arrive, I decide that I'd rather stay by myself and enjoy the con, since it's my first break in over 2 months of tedious work, rather than hanging out with the assholish dude and enduring sloppy make outs. We all meet up three hours later, and sit down to relax a bit. Almost immediately, Amy looks at me with puppy eyes and asks if she can pack her stuff tonight and leave to stay with her bf for the rest of her trip instead of staying with me.
I'm shocked. I understand her desire, of course, but I'm fucking disgusted because I feel used. She had known for a while she'd be staying with me, we had planned stuff, talked about it for months. I was furious she hadn't cancelled earlier; she had known for at least a month her bf lived near the con, and she could have easily warned me in advance she'd stay with him instead. But I didn't want to endure her sulking all weekend so I said yes and then didn't partake in their merry conversation. She had the audacity to ask me if it was because I was tired.
I feel bad for being mad at her, but at the same time I can't help it. She's stopped talking to me since, for some reason, which makes me a little sad, but I guess that's life. Now she posts """"artsy"""" (and ugly) pics of her and her bf with cringy captions on instagram. Might I had that her bf is a moron, ugly, and not that nice- I have no idea what she finds attractive in him.
No. 298430
>>298367Not exactly the same position but my abusive ex would abuse me until I reacted then call me crazy and tell me I needed help. If you think there’s malicious intent behind it rather than her just being selfish or a bit stupid then that’s gaslighting and you shouldn’t put up with it. Mental health problems don’t mean that a person can’t react to shitty behaviour in the same way anyone else would, or that their reaction is less valid.
I think you should work on not getting into a situation where you have months of pent up feelings, like if something like this happens again try to address it early on so you don’t end up having a huge, seemingly random outburst. As logical as it feels to you, it looks insane to everyone else. I’ve been there so I get that you want to keep the peace and give people chances etc but at the end of the day keeping quiet will only lead to you suffering and seeming unreasonable. In her head maybe she was selfish and didn’t consider your feelings or was dismissive of them, which would have been harder for her to do if you’d been confirming that yes, this was upsetting you as shit was happening.
I don’t mean to sound like I’m blaming you, I’ve just learned that at the end of the day only you can protect yourself from the shitty people out there. Communication is the best way to figure out whether they are actually shitty and willing to continue being shitty despite knowing your feelings or if they’re just thoughtless/stupid
No. 300515
I have a friend who is normally very sweet, but she’s absolutely spineless. She’s anxious, insecure and seems almost allergic to sticking up for herself unless it’s way after the fact. She cares way too much about what other people think of her, even if she’s only known them for a week. She’s also really jealous of other girls, especially if they are skinny or pretty. Apparently, she was thin before having a kid, but now she’s overweight and can’t find time to exercise or eat right. Despite this, she still drinks liquor and smokes weed as if it won’t impact her diet. I like her a lot, but I can’t really tolerate being around her too often, especially since also she talks a lot. Even when my other friends and I are on a completely different topic, she’ll come in and begin talking about herself. Usually it’s gossip about her personal life involving people we don’t know or venting about how her family disrespects her or parent woes. None of us have children, so we don’t really care to hear about it. She also doesn’t really ‘get’ a lot of what we talk about, so she’ll derail conversations just to ask us what’s up. She also has a really bad habit of using us, especially me because I’m her ‘goals’ friend, to reassure or psych herself up. It’s annoying. I’m not her fucking confidence sink.
All in all, she’s a good person. I like her and care for her a lot. I just wish she wasn’t so fucking insecure.
No. 300525
>>300509>sometimes I worry she's talking shit about me in her head So kind of like how you just typed that she's a fat fuck with no fashion sense? Clearly you've been thinking about this before you posted.
I think it will matter less to you when you realize everyone judges and has an inner narrative. Including yourself. It doesn't matter.
No. 300821
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I met this girl when I started at a new school in junior year, she’s incredibly wealthy, kind hearted, we have similar taste and politics. She was my first ever female friend who understood wanting to do all the fun vapid girly shit.
>Second week of knowing her she started talking about a relationship she was in where the guy was really obsessed with her
> First month knowing her, said boyfriend is revealed to be Harry Styles
> She says he sends her secret messages via social media by matching colours with her Instagram posts
> Honestly I’m an idiot but I kind of bought it because she is incredibly attractive and again very wealthy, also some of the coincidences were very eerie
>Says someone put something in her fountain that made it turn blood red and found bones that weren’t hers in her dogs mouths
>blamed Taylor Swift
> Went to New York and “waited” for Harry to meet her because he sent her a secret message with a location
>She stopped talking about it for a while and I figured it was over, we had multiple other instances of drama with other mutual friends which brought us really close together
>Middle of Senior year she starts telling other people in our grade about the Harry Styles thing and starts obsessing over the fact that he’s stalking her and she’s not interested
> Her whole family’s phones do actually get tapped, she blames 1D management but honestly it probably had something to do with her dad as he has ties to multiple governments.
>Petty side note but I saved up a ton of my own money to buy a giant princess prom dress because it’s basically been a lame childhood dream of mine and she bought a designer prom dress, didn’t like it, went out and bought a dress with a bigger skirt than mine. I knew it was just to make sure she didn’t lose attention but whatever
> Gets to the point where she’s had falling out with multiple people over Harry Styles stalking her
> At a graduation party with kids from another school I pull her aside and finally tell her that I think she probably has a disorder called Erotomania
> We go off to college and she only talks about herself when we get on Skype, she’s obsessed with her student government and thinks it’s important to the outside world, keeps hanging out with this friend who groped her and I have personally messaged because he was harassing her
> Starts dating a real boy who she claims before they started dating was absolutely stalking her and was such a snake and bad news
>Break up after 4 months because he went to some club and was acting distant also she didn’t want to have sex with him
>comes back home this summer and is saying the same shit she said Harry Styles was doing but with her ex
>Only talks about how her ex is stalking her and saying he’s positioning himself in the same way she does in Instagram posts and that he’s using the same colours to copy her Instagram
I just didn’t message her back the day before I left and I haven’t since
She’s been a very good friend to me but she’s very self absorbed and ignorant of the world while believing she knows it all. I am so sick of talking about how how obsessed people are with her. I can understand that she probably really does deal with girls at school being jealous and mean to her considering she’s beautiful and incredible well off, I’m just sick of having to play along that anyone in the world would be obsessed enough to copy someone’s Instagram as a way to send a message!
No. 323239
>>323233Tbh there's nothing inherently wrong about her liking astrology or smoking weed.
But the sleeping around thing sounds like a major issue; it wouldn't be if she just needed casual hookups but it sounds like she's been misguided into believing that's how one finds a worthy man.
If you don't mind me asking, how old is she? She reminds me of a lot of early 20-somethings who use sex as a way of gaining validation and using it as an emotional crutch, not realizing that many guys in the same age group don't care about forming meaningful relationships or emotional bonds over sex.
It's a hard lesson most people have just gotta learn and grow out of themselves. I wouldn't get yourself involved. Maybe be there for her emotionally I guess? Anything you say she could take it as being critical like you said.
No. 323277
>>323239That's very true, and I think I'm just ranting about her astrology obsession when I don't believe it and think it's dumb.
She's in her early 20s.
I agree that I think she uses it as a coping mechanism and it's not very helpful that our friend group basically enables her habits.
When talking about it she says shes not looking for anything but then complains about being single.
I know she's stubborn so I think she'll learn herself. It's just sad to see how much she's changed overall and I seem to have lost my friend for 10+ years.
No. 323381
I vented about this before, but here I go again…
After highschool I gradually lost all my friends (not that I had many to begin with…). I currenty only have 2.
One of them is super sweet and we get along well when we meet up. IF we meet up… Until a month ago she lived less than 15 minutes away from me, yet we only met up like twice per year. And when meeting up she only wants to stay like 1 hour. I try to text both of them regularly, but they never contact me first. She even forgot my birthday for two years in a row already.
A couple weeks ago I broke my phone, lost all my numbers and therefore messaged them on facebook. The one friend who lived very close to me only replied a week later - but did not give me her number. I tried asking her a few things about her new Uni, apartment, etc but she does not answer. However, I can see that she's constantly on facebook, so she must have read it. This has happened so often before already as well. Whenever I call her out, she apologizes, says she was busy and so on. I can't even count how many times she cancelled plans last minute when we were still in school and going out often together. She's always sick, wants to stay out home etc - yet then I find out that she does go clubbing and stays out long with her other friends
What should I do? Ask her if she no longer likes me?
The other friend I have is not much better. I've only seen her once this year - and only for a very short time as well, but at least she doesn't ghost me.
I don't want to lose them, otherwise I woudln't have anybody. I feel so lonely, I wish I had friends I could spent all day with.
I feel like their behavior (and the one of my former friends as well) ruined me socially and emotionally. I was always the one contacting them first (despite being the shyest and quitest), always trying to get them to do stuff together, but I got rejected so often. So nowadays whenever I just talk to somebody I'm scared that I come across as needy, as too much, as annoying. There are days there I barely say anything at all.
No. 323688
thankful for this thread cuz ive never had much of a chance to speak about this bizarre and unpleasant experience, sorry if this ends up being a long read, there was a LOT of things that irked me
>be me, 17 years old
>going on a student exchange trip with a group of other girls to japan
>oldest in the group, the others are 14-16 years old
>one girl (lets call her Ree) takes a liking to me on the first day, travelling to japan
>Ree mentions that shes lost weight recently and added a comment about it not being lost in "the most healthy way"
>sympathise due to my past history of having an ed
>notice Ree talking about herself a LOT in a self depricating way. Jokes like "i wanna die haha!" "im so fat lol" etc.
>starts to get on my nerves a little
>constantly, i mean, constantly, comments on how skinny i am.
>comments on how many calories i eat, uses anamia terms and quotes from shit i used to read back in my hardout ana days
>makes everyone uncomfortable in the dorm room talking about personal tmi stuff
>brings every conversation back to how skinny i am, its starting to make me real uncomfy
Example: we were walking in a mall tgether after getting some dinner, pointing out which clothes we liked. She kept complaining that she felt so fat from dinner, and saying "oh none of these clothes would fit me, but (my name) would fit all of them, shes so skinny"
She also told me that she was bisexual, so i confided in her that i am a lesbian and showed her a picture of my gf. She then outed me to everyone (thank god they were okay with it, turns out there was another lesbian on the trip).
>kept asking me for diet tips
>was very racist to two other girls on the trip
>had shit japanese but acted like an authority on languages
>claimed her name in japanese was "yuzuki" and introduced herself as such (fucking lol)
>was a major koreaboo
>followed me and my friends everywhere, not realising she pissed us all off
>followed me into WEGO and brought the same skirt as me
>dyed her hair the same colour as mine (mine is dark brown, hers was ginger blonde)
>cut and styled her hair exactly like mine
>made everything about herself
Example: one girl was talking to us about a suicide attempt last year, she said if she had vertically cut her arms back then that she would have definitely died and was glad shes still alive. Ree HAD to add "oh! Thats how you do it. Ill remember that for when i kill myself" like…. It was a very raw and emotional subject we were talking about. The self harming girl started crying and didnt want to talk about any personal stuff anymore because she felt so uncomfy around Ree.
I eventually snapped. We all asked her to come sit with us. I talked to her about all the things she did that made us uncomfortable and not to do them again. She started doing some guilt trippy shit and i went off my nut and yelled that i hated her and that she ruined the first week of our trip. Lol, it still frustrates me to this day that she could NOT get the hints that she was creeping us all out and just generally being a pain. She still posts online about us and about me specifically and how mean i was to her.
No. 323689
>>323686People who expect you to watch things just because they recommend it are the worst. As if I have that much free time to waste or enough of an attention span.
I had one friend who kept sending me cat videos even after I told him that I have my own cats, I don't need to look at them online. He kept doing it and doing it no matter how unenthusiastic my responses were, even when I ignored him, eventually I just stopped talking to him at all because someone who can consistently disregard my lack of interest in something clearly doesn't value my opinion at all. Sounds dramatic for a response to cat videos but it was also obvious he was using them as an excuse to talk to me so that annoyed me even more.
No. 323697
>>323381no offense anon but maybe u're just not that fun to be around.
also, are friends expected to remember each other's birthdays?? mine always just announce it beforehand if they're doing something or just quietly let it pass otherwise. nbd.
No. 323809
>>323697I know that I'm not a very nice person. But they were my best friends back then in school, so I at least would like her to be honest with me and just tell me that she no longer wants to see me instead of just always promising "soon", "next time" whatever or ghosting me like she does now. We've spent new years eve together for the last 5 or 6 years already, if she hated me that much she would have made plans with other people, no?
I do think that one should text somebody on their birthday; at least that's what I always do and like I said, we once were very close, so…
And that's why I was asking about what to do now. I really have no idea.
No. 323849
>>323689Honestly, you sound pretty shitty, anon.
>>323839Oh god, I can't fucking stand those types. I would say other than Woe is Me and Tough Cookie types, the worst is Miserly Loves Company. Like, the type of people who resent anyone who doesn't have an over the top shitty life because ~it's not fair~ and belittles anything others are going through as no big deal.
No. 323939
I used to be friends with this girl and she was insufferable. Typical sjw and vegan preacher, you always had to watch everything you say in front of her, but that wasn't the worst. She was always complaining about being deppressed and her life myseries but literally everything could have been arranged easily.
She complained about being poor and not being able to find a job but she refused to apply to any job. I went miles and miles to help her find one, I would even write her "motivation letters" (idk what's the term in english, basically a letter that you give alongside of a resume), but she would never apply because there was always something unpleasant about the job, not getting that with her degree and experience, she couldnt just get the perfect job right away.
She would complain about being ugly but it was like she would make herself ugly on purpose, wearing the most unflattering make up and clothes.
She would get upset and offended that I didnt invite her to all the events I organized (parties, going out, etc) even though there wasnt a single friend of mine that I invited to everything and even though none of my friends actually wanted to hang out with her because she weirded everyone out and was aweful to hang out with.
She blamed everything on her deppression and anxiety but she took no action what so ever to get better. When me and her sister convinced her to go see a therapist, she quit after two meetings because she was tired of the therapists questions.
She always asked people for "a doctor that would give her adderal to have energy" even though it wouldnt have helped her because she doesn't have ADHD.
At one point, I slowly started to hang out with her less because her alcoholism became too much for me. My father's an alcoholic and I have few patience for the kind of behaviour he exhibits and she was exhibiting the same behaviour : ie never going out and only going out so she could drink and then stay in silence. She lived with her sister who didnt want her to drink so she would come over to my place to drink.
I told her that I didnt want to hang out with her when she was drunk and therefore I wouldnt invite her to parties anymore but that we could still hang out to do "wholesome stuff".
She blocked me and to this day, my friends tell me she's saying everyone that she posts stuff on facebook about me like "she was soooo abusive and toxic but without her I feel so lonely, fuck her tho!!"
No. 324060
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Hey this person isn’t an friend as much as a friend of a friend, but recently I’ve had too spend more time with them because they’re in my new DnD group and it’s fustrating.
They’re quite alright but nothing especially dazzling:
>about 5’5
>mousey hair
>thin but I can never really tell body shape because she dresses like she she 12.
>anime fan
Wouldn’t really care about all this because I’m not superficial about her but I can tell she’s insecure because whenever I’m with her she dosent shut up about me:
>keeps reminding me I’m quite chubby (lmao as if I give a shit.)
>Someone else in the group asked me what my favrioute kind of figure in a woman was, and I said an hourglass cause I have one and I like it. Started a whole argument on how I don’t have an hourglass figure and that I have a ‘rectangular’ figure instead, googled for a chart.
>told me that I should get breast reduction surgery or else they’ll sag when I’m older, and that I should get it done young too.
>has a new bf every few months, they all look the same as well haha, little twig men. Won’t shut up about how amazing her relationship is.
>now she knows my sexuality she tells everyone we meet that I’m a lesbian. I can tell she likes this because she’s defiantly one of those girls that sees everyone’s as competition, and isn’t glad I can’t ‘take her man’ or whatever the fuck this weirdo thinks.
I only tolerate her because she’s close too my bestie but god damn, she’s starting too drive me up the wall. Can someone be this’s insecure?
No. 324067
>>324060Your "friend" sounds like one of those anons who complain about their "fat" friend not taking their unsolicited diet advice.
Especially the bit about your tits getting saggy if they're not extremely small + immediately saying you should get ps.
Also, wanting a small and young bf.
I bet she thinks of herself as super petite and feminine? lol
No. 324128
>>323653the worst is when they keep moving closer every time you scoot away. bitch I moved for a reason, fucking STOP
I can only take so many small steps away before we're completely separated from the group, and then I'm the asshole for being "rude" and leaning away because I don't want your fucking halitosis froth all over my face? fuck that shit.
No. 324179
>>323689>>323850Ugh, that sounds annoying, especially since it sounds like they were both hitting on you with the lowest amount of effort possible and expected a reaction.
I mean, the grievance I have with my friend is really minor, but they're sending me stuff like Shane Dawson… Like damn, I don't even have time to consume my favorite content and you send me
that?
No. 324767
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My best friend is a really awesome person and is always there for me, makes me go out and do stuff instead of staying inside being depressed etc. I really love her, but there are just some things that drive me fucking crazy about her. This is gonna be super nitpicky but:
>went to korea for half a year and CONSTANTLY talks about the partying she did there, the cool people/celebritys she met there etc. literally mentions this shit at least twice per hour if not more
>says she is insecure and stuff but seems to feel superior to most people. for example she dresses kinda unusally for where we live (think a k-hip hop, streetwear, billie eilish type of look) and it always feels like she judges my outfits for being more basic than hers and not as out there
>sucks up to her "famous" korean friends and other people she met there that she considers cool/that have a lot of followers on instagram and is overly nice/"Omg love u so much" towards them
>always wants to get her way, acts like she doesn't mind doing things the way someone else wants but is super pissy when it happens
these are all things i can deal with but recently since i've opened up more about my issues with food (which she was really sweet and supportive about, but yeah) she's been doing shit that REALLY pisses me off
>copies my ED behaviors and is weirdly competitive about it even though she never showed signs of an ED before and was never underweight or fluctuated a lot in weight or showed any other outward signs of an ED
>tells me triggering stuff like "oh ya lol i feel shitty if i eat over 600 calories a day" when she KNOWS i am struggling and this stuff triggers me
>enables my binges, seems smug as fuck when she sees me eating and she is not
>talks about ED stuff as if she knows exactly what it's like when it's obvious that she has no idea
>when she talks about calories etc i try to tell her not to go down the rabbit hole and try to lose weight healthily she says it's "too late" when BITCH I SAW YOU EATING NORMALLY YESTERDAY AND THE DAY BEFORE THAT
I dunno maybe I'm wrong and none of this is super bad, but it just feels like she's downplaying my issues and like she just suddenly developed them out of the blue once i opened up about mine (which were obvious long before I started talking to her or anyone about it). Am i just projecting my own insecurities on her? Is it just my ED being competitive and bitchy and petty? It bothers me so fucking much it almost feels like she needs to always be in the center of attention, which she already is without taking "my thing" away from me. Maybe i sound ridiculous. I dunno. Ugh.
No. 324772
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Not a ‘friend’ but its my step-brothers girlfriend who I feel obligated to hangout with because of how close we live.
>23 years old with 2 “oops” babies that omgtotallyweresounexpextedwooow and several miscarriages
>Basically lives check to check with my step-brother yet refuses strive to get a job other than starbucks because shes so attached to it.
>Is basically a free “promotional model” (her words) for several photographers and tattoo shops, spends her time there for free rather than making money to help support her family.
>Prides herself on being “domesticated” yet is shit at cooking and has a shitty dirty roach infested flat. Only ever makes soups where veggies are boiled into a mush of nothing.
>Never/underpays her own family for childcare. We have a mutual friend who was promised money for her watching 2 kids but she never saw it.
>the biggest attention whore who thinks everybody cares about when she’ll have her next baby, or when she’ll be marrying my step brother.
>literally raids my parents cupboards for snacks and food and will take handfuls of whatever she fancies, yet got super pissy about me finishing off some biscuits at her place because i was stuck watching her brats for 24 hours without anything to eat (even though she promised food to be a part of the deal and justified that as a reason to underpay me) and held that against me despit the face that she owes me nearly 300£ and im guilted into helping her constantly.
>is a shit mom and never gives a shit about her kids (never celebrates birthdays except for the first ones, where she can use it to be the center of attention yet again, doesnt buy christmas gifts for them despite making actual lists for our parents stating what she wants, and doesnt do anything festive for her kids for Halloween yet throws away 50£ On her own shitty costume so she can parade around her tattoo shop cleaning up for NOTHING.
>Only cares about her kids when she can assert some lame position and act like a bitch and go around sulking because “Im a muuuuuuum, you have to respect meeeee and what i waaaant ” (this was in regards to giving a 10 month only a bit of real food…. perfectly normal) Yet when she sends her first kid off to her dads she will go weeks without FaceTime or calling.
>borderline aspie who cant take even the slightest bit of sarcasm amd uses it to sound “smart” and as if we as a family are just all bird brains.
>tacky makeup, shit fashion sense (thinks fashion trends are beneath her) and is only into bold colorful tacky makeup. Shitty tattoos and a female buzzcut.
Went shopping twice with this annoying bitch and each time she was the biggest drama queen. If she wants to leave she will complain like a child until you’ve had enough. She made passive aggressive comments behind me while pushing her kids pram “i know you’re tired, but your aint insists on browsing when she doesnt need anything” Uses her babies as an excuse to ditch and leave somewhere that isnt about her. I could go on about her but it’d just be too much. I cant stand this cunt.
No. 324944
>>324930>she's a glorified waitress I'm not about to whiteknight what sounds like a shitty person, but flight attendants get paid very well with seniority and have great benefits.
Internationally trained attendants in my company who've got 20 years of seniority make $80/hr. Considering they often don't have further education, that's great pay. Plus the health insurance (where cosmetic surgeries are often covered).
It's a great job of one can stick with it, I'd hardly compare that to waitressing.
No. 327702
>>324930This . Also most of them are whores.
>>324944Yes, you forgot to say in that $80 an hour (after 20 years, mind you) that that means IN FLIGHT. If the poor sucker is stucked in local flights then she would be fucked.
Also imagine being 60 and still have to be a waitress. No thank you.
No. 330264
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>>330243ask her the real question
No. 355264
Anons, I'm really annoyed by a friend of mine, and I feel bad about it.
She is a good person, funny, I enjoy talking to her.
She is also -always- extremely late, socially awkward with others which can be embarassing, monologues about special interests that I don't share, bad hygiene (smells a bit)/doesn't take care of herself, stands super close to people, will text me long essays multiple times in a row (will not wait for a reply) with long videos I should watch (about her special interests). I've tried to talk about the last thing that it can be too much but she acted a bit hurt. I feel bad for being annoyed with her since she seems like she could be on the spectrum, but we once talked about Aspergers in general and she said she definitely doesn't have it.
Have you been in a similar situation and how did you handle it? Maybe I should hang out with her a little less often and reply less to the essays and videos (they stress me out.)
No. 355380
>>355264As a fellow former "protect people from their feelings" human I relate to not wanting to let her down. It's just not your burden fam. 99% of the time you shouldn't be stressing the fuck out to keep people in your life. Friendship and love shouldn't come at a price like that.
You don't owe anyone your time anon. There are tons of other funny people. Most people you'll meet are going to be good people (srsly is that even a thing we should be praising as a trait worth acknowledging? gj you got basic human decency down lmao). Most people, especially women, you'll meet will smell neutral if not good. ETC~
If your interests don't even align and there is no room for you to comfortably bridge these gaps (sounds like it's just taxing on you) then fuck it. Being friends just bc someone is vaguely nice is the dumbest shit ever.
Don't put up with a stinky autist that makes you and your other friends uncomfortable just bc you feel you should treat everyone a certain way. Life is short and others' problems really, truly aren't your problems.
No. 355714
>>355380Thanks for you reply.
We do have a shared interest in a sport both practice. So it's natural that we meet and talking about that stuff is also fun. But I watched (suffered through) a superhero movie with her once and now she won't stop going on about that shit + shipping despite my lack of interest and sends fan vids to me lol.
I do agree with you anon that it's probably better to focus more on other friendships but I also think one issue here is with me. It's ironic since we are on lolcow but I really do have an issue with being more blunt or express a critical opinion with friends.
No. 355792
>>355720>Girls are smol and soft uwu! Trans humanism and luxury communism yay!TBH she sounds very TIM-like or someone who hangs out too much with TIMs
>terf channel I'm very interested in this.
No. 355815
>>355792>>355799we have a terf channel in our discord server as a containment channel so a few of us dont spam the other channels with it.
She's 28 and one of the oldest in our group and she acts like she's one of the youngest. she's very unsure of herself and super susceptible to suggestion. I think she's seen lesfems on tumblr talk about how coming out was one of the best things theyve ever done and thinks that political lesbianism will make all of her suffering and heartbreak go away. she legit thinks women are incapable of doing anything wrong. and i have no idea where she gets this from honestly.
the contra defense stuff blows my mind because last night i was complaining about how he insinuated that vaginas are holes to be fucked in his "are traps gay" video and she was like "contrapoints says some good things about leftism!" and i was legit dumbfounded.
She complains about how she doesnt "fit in" with the rest of the server and everyone just ignores her when she says it. We're all nice people but i really regret invited her to the server.
No. 367671
I've recently stopped talking to my boyfriend's best friend because all his interactions with me are so negative. I brought it up to him again and he threw a big fit at me, which he apologised for weeks later but I honestly don't have the energy to keep talking to him, he brings nothing good in my life.
>is bitter about being a virgin and never having had a gf, but also hates women
>seems to think I'm "one of the good ones" but also makes very unpleasant comments about my appearance at all times
>calls me fat every time we hang out (even though I've been losing weight and I'm almost at my goal weight, while he's still visibly overweight)
>makes sexual comments about me, like asking if I'm a prostitute because my makeup wasn't to his tastes, saying that my butt is too large for me to get up, sexualising me playing with my bf's dog
>he passes insults off as "banter" and says I'm too emotional when it hurts my feelings
>has said before that he will stop being our friend if my bf and I have children (which we plan to) because he's Chinese and I'm white, and I'd be betraying my people
>undermines everything I do ; I'm learning how to program and I've finished a demo for a simple game all by myself, he says "but it's just javascript, everyone knows that"
>every time I try to talk to him IRL about something I'm interested in, he looks at his phone and says "mmh", then changes the subject to whatever video game he's playing or outright walks away
>if I talk to him online, he'll either ignore me or send me his alt-right articles that I don't care about
>has no respect for my personal space, does shit like take my drink before I've even tried it and smell it without asking me
>is never grateful, I've cooked and baked for him many times and never gotten even a "thank you"
>expects emotional support every time he has an argument with his dad but never gives any support back
>never has money even though he works, my bf or I often end up paying for his food and drinks and he doesn't say thanks
Typing all of this out makes me see how much of a dick he is, but I feel guilty for cutting contact with someone in my bf's circle. My boyfriend is completely fine with it and said it's my decision, but I can't help but feel I'm the girlfriend who enters the male group of friends and starts shit.
No. 368829
>drops out of college, computer engineering in his third year
>a fucking anime nerd, loves boobs than plot, hentai is life
>wants to work, I suggest him to work at a convenience store near his place or any restaurants near his fucking place
>said no cause he doesn't like people, now he limit his job search but doesn't do anything to get a job
>stays home, do chores and watch anime
>sometimes rides his motorcycle to play pokego and says its exercise
>parents likely no longer want him in their home but let him stay to do repair some shit
>assists the anime club in our college
>wants to become an animator, I told him to start drawing and try to do some animation in free apps
>says no cause he doesn't the great apps and wants to be prepared and whines about his parents don't support him
>ofc, why would they? you don't try, you give up and go back to watching slice of life anime with boobs on it
Idk what to say about him anymore… he's a hopeless case, dreaming too much but doing too little… can be perverted, is perverted and will be left behind while his friends, anime nerds at best, works and do shit with their life while he stays in his parents' place… wondering the fuck is going on with his life…
It would have been great to have rant about this last year cause god i got shit about him but now it simmers and dying down cause he and I barely to each other.
No. 368836
File: 1549551172910.gif (1021.1 KB, 393x220, clock-gif-1.gif)
A close friend of mine has a huge problem with being on time. Everytime we hang out, she will be at least 40 minutes late, I'm not kidding. Every single time.
We agree to see each other at 6, she will come at around 6,45, sometimes 7, even 7,15. One time we had to go to an office, we knew it was closing up at 5, agreed to see each other at 4, she came at 4,50. You try to call her to tell her to hurry tf up, she doesn't even pick up.
She comes by car, we're in a small town so there's no traffic/long distance issues, and she doesn't spend time doing her hair or makeup. When asked why was she so late, she will always make up an excuse.
It's not just with me, she's like this with everyone, even her boyfriend. Lately they fought because she was late for the millionth time and he got fed up and started cussing out outside of her door. I can't really blame him for that, I think it's a matter of respect and when you're always so late, it's like you don't respect that person. It's also bad for you, because you likely won't be able to have a functional life. Everything has a time: your job, college classes… it can become a huge problem.
No. 368866
>>368836I knew someone like this. After a while I just stopped bothering to wait.
Once we agreed to meet up to go see a movie and as expected, I waited outside the cinema and she was late. The movie was at 6:00PM so at 6:05 I went in. Didn't bother to text her, since she never bothers to let me know if she'll be late. Put my phone on silent and enjoyed the movie.
Movie ended, I look at my phone and at about 7:00PM I'd received some missed calls and angry texts from her asking where I was. Left it a half hour then casually texted back, "The movie started so I went in instead of missing it after I already paid for my ticket."
She's never been late with me again. She's still late with other people, but she knows now if she's late with me I'll just leave instead of wasting hours waiting for her.
No. 369263
File: 1549601785586.jpg (64.44 KB, 500x499, large.jpg)
Finding a place to eat with my best friend for Valentines day is an absolute nightmare!
She's such a picky eater. Going out we're stuck going places with burgers/pizza/nuggets/steaks.Even then she gets it plain. In our 13 years of friendship I dont think I've ever seen her eat a fruit or vegetable. She has a problem with textures, which I get sometimes. Last time she didn't eat her mashed potatoes because had the potato's skin in it. A 22 year old woman shouldn't freak out about that.
No. 370094
>>370083 yes! influencing her to do it herself last summer, she wanted to lose weight and I told her that she should be cautious with hers but nope, she literally starve herself with little food a day and more exercise and she did lose weight but gradually gain a lot more than her original weight during the school year, it's sad but glad knowing she doesn't focus on girl groups anymore cause a lot of anachan praising are on that group but also still present on the boy groups either…
And idk anon, it's been years she's been addicted to kpop, as she grows older the more she's influenced and opened to her following the trends around it… talking to her is like walking on a landmine that I don't want to do. There are times I've tried to do it but she's a stubborn girl, who I can admit thinks she's right and people are wrong sometimes, and have been fed with whatever brainwash the kpop fandom and the industry itself fed her to think people except idols are sad and malicious beings and idols should be protected…
No. 370295
> Met her in middle school, thought we had a lot in common because we both liked to draw and neither of us were super wealthy.
> First shopping trip I went on with her, she made it known that she believes that anyone who shops at walmart and not nordstroms/whole foods is beneath her
> like excuse you, what the fuck
> bitches about her mom's husband and kids but has no problem taking his money
> larps as a socialist and a rad feminist but knows nothing about either, she just likes the aesthetics
> would poke fun at my weight by pinching my cheeks, knew I was sensitive about it
> when I lost a lot of weight and was dieting she was supportive of it, would often push junk food on me and say I "wasn't living" because I said no to a donut
> would brag and put others down because she was in honors and AP history/english courses, never got higher than a C in any of those classes
> told me to "stop bragging" about earning all A's for the first time in high school. Later found out she barley squeaked by because she took classes she knew she couldn't pass.
> gave me shit for not going away for college even though she knew my scholarships wouldn't cover room and board
> thinks that because she's getting an arts related degree that she's smarter than everyone else. She barely makes it through her classes because she never goes.
> alienated a good portion of our friend group after graduating high school because she's insecure about her relationship with her bf
> uses her bf as an attack dog rather than facing her problems on her own, because she's chicken shit
> sicked her bf on me because I forgot to say happy birthday to her. never mind that I was having a family crisis at the time.
> made it a point to ovoid her because she was acting like an ass over the whole thing.
> had another family crisis only this time someone died
> she heard threw the grape vine of friends that we still had and she txt me acting like nothing had happened.
> I was curt with her because I was not in the best head space and just wanted to work through things on my own.
> my family pushed me to try hanging out her with her again because "you need to move on and learn to forgive"
> tried to hang out with her again but whatever good traits she had were gone. she's very self centered and empty af, she only cares about her own ego.
> "anon you can tell me anything I want to support you."
> tells her that I miss this person a lot and what they meant to me, she then proceeds to push us to a different topic because she was only saying that to get asspats. she doesn't give a flying fuck about my feelings.
> meet up again and she starts bragging about her bf and how he was possessive of her before they started dating, as in he would tell other guys that were interested in her that she wasn't dating.
> it gets annoying after a while because every conversation has to be about her and her bf so I chime in asking "well, did they say anything about me lol?"
> she gets pissed off and tells me that her bf didn't ask them and for me to drop the subject.
> the last time I saw her in person I was about done with her and her bs and started to mess her. I knew that everything I said would be repeated to her bf or other friends, so I started insulting the media that her bf self identified with (he's a fedora tipping atheist who plays lots of vida) and went out of my way to make her uncomfortable (like talking about wanting a family since she hates kids).
> probably really petty of me but I was tired of her acting like a pompous know it all about everything.
> after than meetup I haven't seen her and have gone out of my way to stay away from her.
> later heard that she has to go back to community college because she fucked up her grades at her fancy college. I will graduate before her.
> also, she's gained a ton of weight because she eats whatever her bf eats
After a bit of self reflection, I realize that she has always been a bit of cunt but it only got worse as she started dating people and went off to college. She was never very supportive of the things I liked, for instance, I really like country music/western movies and she would find any opportunity to tell me about how it's shit music whilst unironically praising Nicki Minaj. Same thing with the wanting to diet, she never supported it and would make comments about how much of a "stick" I was and that I was going to lose my boobs and "curves." Idk, she just really hurtful towards the end and I'm glad I don't hang out with her anymore.
No. 370726
>>370096I'm fed up with her but in polite company have to deal with it.
She splits personalities based on who we're with, sometimes they're pleasant enough and I can forget she's like this.
No. 370803
File: 1549806703974.png (73.11 KB, 500x347, im-contident-in-the-factthat-l…)
Sorry if this ends up long i need to get this off my chest.
I have a guy and girl friend who up until recently I considered to be my best friends. I've been hanging out with them almost every weekend for the past couple of months and started noticing just how negative and toxic they are to my life. They are always down playing the strides I am making and overall right off everything i say. My guy friend is also friends with my older brother so he is constantly comparing us. Now normally I dont mind being compared to my siblings because I love them dearly and of course we are going to have similar quirks! But they way he does it is always with disgust and annoyance its seems. I get it my siblings and I are extremely forgetful and weird people but we are working on it lol! What adds fuel to the fire is that my girl friend constantly chimes in as well and she isnt friends with my brother at all. It irks me to no end because they are constantly bringing up not only my brother but my other siblings as a means to make fun of them meanwhile whenever they bring up gripes they have with their siblings i never cosign because its THEIR siblings and I dont know them that well. And even if i did i would never start listing off the things that annoy me about them or make fun of them to them because thats not my fucking place. An example of this is my older sister a few years ago was sent to a psych ward after having suicidal thoughts after not being able to accept my mothers death. It was a very traumatic experience for my family and I brought it up to my friends as a means to vent and get positive energy. Instead my guy friend will randomly to this day ask me "how is your crazy older sister doing" and its so gross. He is also a "libertarian" who voted for trump which although I dont agree with trump at all I didnt want to end a friendship over politics. The problem is he constantly brings up negative events surrounding black people/poc not as a means for discussion and to get a differing opinion but just to cause division and anger. (im black and hes white). At first i didnt mind because I could easily ignore him but since its black history month he finds it funny to do it even more even after I tell him to stop. Which shows me that he doesnt value my feelings. Which I recently spazzed and told him
On to my girl friend. Ive known her since 3rd grade (we're 24) so of course I considered her my best friend. But honestly the feelings arent reciprocated. She is also extremely passive aggressive and rude when it comes to me. She constantly shuts down my suggestions and ideas and will literally roll her eyes/check her phone or even tell me to shutup whenever i start talking but will be open ears and receptive whenever he does. She is also extremely mean to me and tries to embarrass me whenever we are around her other friends or new people. She also places value over friends she recently met and will shower them with gifts meanwhile they will give her dust. (ex: She recently bought our guy friend a 3ds for no reason meanwhile he doesnt even know her bday and weve all been friends since hs.) Speaking of birthdays at her last bday party she had invited her work friends and me out to dinner.She was being nasty to me the whole night but i let it slide because she was the bday girl. Everything was going fine until it was time to pay. Now idk how any of yall were raised but I have always followed the unwritten rule that the bday person never pays for their meal/drinks. Tell me why at the start of dinner 2 of her work friends asked for separate checks. Strange I know. Even worse when it came time to pay I was the only one who wasnt counting my friend as a person to pay and was pulling out extra money because i was planning on paying for her. When she sees me do this instead of politely declining or saying thank you she very loudly in front of everyone starts saying "what the fuck are you doing can you even do math you only got one thing why are you putting more money" and snatches my cash and only put what i owed. Meanwhile none of her friends or even her own brother tried to pay additional. She actually ended up paid for her AND her brothers meal. (her brother is 21). This isnt even the tip of the iceberg. I once confided with her about an abusive relationship I was in and hadnt told anyone about due to shame and not even 10 mins after telling her she makes a domestic violence joke. She affected my mental health so badly that I blocked her on everything once for a month. It felt good. I ended up feeling bad/petty for doing so without warning so i ultimately unblocked her and chalked it up to my pms.
HOnestly I am at fault for constantly letting shit slide or laughing things that hurt me off so as not to cause drama or a rift. But at this point Im done. They literally just try to one up each other in the pity party dept all while being narcissistic and laughing at their other friends failed love lives. Its gross and I want to bring this all up to them especially since on friday they were so mean to me i emotionally shut down and went home and cried. But i dont know if I am being selfish since he is about to move out of state soon and she is dealing with her great grandmas death as well as her 25th bday is coming up next month. Its annoying how despite all of this I am still trying to look out for THEM. Should I wait until these events pass or should I bring it up now? Thank you to whoever read this long shit lolol
No. 375073
File: 1550396135712.gif (1.73 MB, 480x360, wXI2WeS.gif)
>be best friends since grade school
>stopped being friends a few years back when she kept making excuses for her friend who my (now) ex bf was cheating on me with
>girl was an 'artist' type, social activist, important for later
>she apologizes a year ago, makes genuine effort to patch things up, back to friends, stuff's p. cool
>but she's friends with a bunch of dumb 'filmmakers'/'artists' who are all poly and/or pretentious af. we're in a small city that is not known for its art or creativity.
>constantly bitches to me about how these people are having all of these relationship/interpersonal problems and it's stressing her out to be around them, but constantly makes excuses and 'poly isn't bad!!' even though it's causing constant drama in that group
>bemoans feeling like she doesn't belong or connect with anyone, just wants to create art and this group is who she connects most with
>gets dumped by her bf
>recently connects w/ this shitty musician dude who's, you guessed it, poly
>they have a 'weird connection' in her words, he makes romantic vaugetweets after they hang out like he's straight out of highschool, makes depressed baitposts, he gets her into a bunch of music shows, sends her 'meaningful' texts
>they end up fucking, she regrets it but tells me she shouldn't feel like she regrets it
>he played her like a fiddle
>mfw they're still hanging out tons and i'm bracing for her to date him and start talking about how poly is actually amazing you guys and monogamy is for the unwoke
it's exhausting to constantly hear about all this dumb shit and people equating fucking everything that moves with art. and it's doubly frustrating because it's all gross dudes finding a label for their being allergic to commitment and using it to manipulate women with low self esteem
No. 377571
>>377314Because I can't really get away from her, so I have to be civil with her. Not to mention she has a fullblown meltdown if I try to distance myself at all, which would still end up impacting me because we are in the same circles and the rest of the people also dislike her, but we've all known her for years, and everyone doesn't want to just dump her all at once, but if we don't, she's just gonna end up being passive aggressive to those of us who still talk to the people who 'abandoned' her/the group.
We dont want to all jump ship at once bc she has no other actual friends, and we're all considered her 'close friends'
plus I think I have a weird thing about it bc she sort of… idk how to put it. It's not grooming bc it wasnt for sexual stuff, but she's manipulative as hell, and has been since I befriended her.
No. 386960
One of my closest friends is great in most ways, but incredibly irresponsible with work and money. It's annoying but it usually doesn't affect me so I tell her she's an idiot when she asks and otherwise leave it be.
I recently got a promotion, so I have a bit of extra money, which is nice. Apparently now she thinks I'm her personal ATM.
She blew off all her work (freelancing) this month as usual, and is behind on her rent and bills as a result. She's harassed me for money three times in the past day. The first time I said OK, because I was in a good mood and feeling generous, and I gave her $50 for food. Big mistake.
A few hours later she says "Can you send me another $20? A bill I wasn't expecting just turned up."
I said no, she should keep better track of her own bills and it's not my responsibility to pick up after her if she can't do basic adult shit at her age. She said OK, she understood.
Just now she calls me again about some other bill she hadn't remembered and asks for $90. I told her that if she actually did her work and made a note of when she has bills to pay she wouldn't have these problems, and every time she has a money problem she always blames it on other people making late payments but the only common factor is her, every time.
She hung up and is now texting me angrily about how I can afford to spare money for my friends and she'd never do this to me. Never mind that I've never asked for money because I don't make stupid financial decisions.
No. 387114
>>386970You're in no way obliged to pay any attention to him. Once you realise that you've been taught your whole life to politely waste your time and energy on other people and you actually don't have to do it life becomes so much easier.
Just ignore and he'll stop.
No. 387565
>>387553He's great at costuming and they run a haunted house. He's decent at scaring kids too and willing to work on their projects for free any time. Plus the friend group has another guy who is an entitled mooch and makes him look tame by comparison. Weirdly enough mooching guy is nice and respectful to me so we have zero problems plus he's really young and still has the hope of growing out of it.
All of my best interactions with him have been sharing workspace and crafting. He's good at what he does so I can put up with some moping and bitching from him and limit my exposure. It's been therapeutic venting though because I'm new to the area and all of my friends here are his mutual friends. They acknowledge he's whiny but they're also desensitized to it and I think he feels more comfortable unloading his drama on me in general. Lol, lucky me.
No. 387570
File: 1552801300266.jpg (51.04 KB, 564x564, 82fe8d83d3725d4014898c976e3767…)
This is a bit of an odd one.
I've known this friend for around 20 years. At uni we were housemates. She was always a pain in the ass, and her clinginess and emotional blackmail made it difficult to distance myself from her.
>Loads of petty irritations and some downright shitty behaviour.
After uni I moved away. She went travelling around Australia. She backed off a bit.
Thanks to facebook, she found me and started writing. She'd become a hypochondriac. It was boring and she's totally self-absorbed.
NOW SHE'S CLAIMING SHE'S BEEN A TARGETED INDIVIDUAL SINCE 2016.
She sent me all the details how she got on their "list", what they do, how they break into her house when she's out, etc etc
On messenger and emails she sends walls of links to youtubes about TIs and was sending me daily records of what had happened TI related.
To stop her texts I said my phone was broken. I decided to ignore her emails and snail mail. When she asked if I got them, I said … no, they must be intercepting them.
I feel massive guilt saying this feeding into her delusion.
Oh, and she now lives approx 10 miles from me. She's called at my place but I pretend I'm out. She wanted to take me to town to show me how she's being targeted continually.
She's still a hypochondriac and blames her maladies on microwave weaponry. Also, if I mention I have an illness, suddenly she has it too. I mentioned a liver syndrome I was born with and she claimed to have contracted it. Thing is, it's not an "illness", it's something you're born with and totally harmless.
I never really liked her, so if she wasn't in my life I wouldn't be bothered, but I CAN'T GET RID OF HER.
Worse still, she's phoned my parents. She's had their number since we were at uni and she'd call me when I was back home for a few days or a week.
Any advice?
(Also kinda concerned TIs might be a thing and she IS one and they might start on me because I know her).
No. 387746
>>387600I was thinking of writing to her that they found my email address and told me not to contact her or shit will happen. It's so tiring playing along with it all.
For all her faults and hypochondria she was never a liar or prone to being a fantasist.
I'm evil though. I told her our ex landlady's husband was a Freemason (he was!) and that sent her off on one. I should stop, but it's a sick way of getting her back for things that pissed me off years ago.
>>387681She's seen one and he said it's depression and put her on entry level SSRIs and sent her to talking therapy. She didn't tell him about her being a TI though. I asked her who else knows and she said 3 friends but they're not interested because they don't know what a TI is.
Oh, she knows my address. She sent me a Christmas card! After uni she quickly got knocked up and her daughter's an emo teen. I don't know how it affects her.
I might just offend her by trying to convince her it's her imagination and coincidence. I mean, it's probably what it is, but she kept talking about it because I pretended I believed in it. I'll definitely get her to tell her doctor. Got to be cruel to be kind.
I wish I could log in to my facebook and paste some of the stuff she was saying, but I deactivated it and she'll know I'm about if I do. Really crazy shit like how she was going on holiday and they followed her onto the plane. No disrespect, but you've got to have a massive sense of self importance to believe they'd go to those lengths…or paranoid.
Sometimes though I do wonder if I'm wrong and it's all true (although they're all batshit TIs on youtube, so…)
No. 388165
>>387949She's an only child. I don't know her parents address. She's a regular at her GP surgery and has a therapist. She falls in and out of part time jobs because her depression gets in the way. I suspect she might've mentioned the TI thing to a therapist and she's not saying what they said to her. It's difficult to even deal with this because I'm not even sure TI's are fiction. I start to believe what she's saying sometimes.
>>387953You haven't known her for 20 years. You don't know what she was like before this. This applies to
>>387956. She's complicated, our friendship was always complicated. At times she's been a seriously massive cunt but I stuck around. Your comments are invalid.
No. 388227
>>388165>You haven't known her for 20 years. You don't know what she was like before this. This applies to >>387956. She's complicated, our friendship was always complicated. At times she's been a seriously massive cunt but I stuck around. Your comments are invalid.So what? What's your point and how is that actually relevant now? She can be a cunt, or could've been a huge cunt, and be or have been unwell, idiot, and when she's barely clinging to reality isn't the time to take petty revenge on her for having been a cunt in the past, especially when she has a child. You sound incapable of introspection. Sorry that you come off like a douchebag to everyone while you're literally listing multiple behaviors that indicate that she's likely in need of serious psychiatric help, and that you spent the better part of two posts basically bragging about antagonizing her, even when you know she has a kid that might suffer from your egging her on, even. Just because you "stuck around" doesn't mean anything. Tons of 'friendships' are similarly unhelpful and pointless and only persist because of that longevity. Everyone thinks you sound like a shitty person and agrees that she sounds sick. And by the way, just because she isn't currently diagnosed with something more severe than depression doesn't mean she can't be seriously ill. I don't see how the 'complicated' nature of your relationship changes the fact that she's obviously not all there, mentally, and yet all you've done is complain about how that inconveniences you (all while having the gall to provoke someone who seems this detached from reality, and then laugh about it).
Either your yardstick for determining when someone is mentally unsound is completely retarded, or you're just very invested in believing she's not likely out of her mind despite everything you've posted literally pointing to the contrary all because you want to continue to believe you're not shitty for provoking a schizo, or at the least, a woman who is in the throes of a prolonged psychotic episode.
No. 388683
File: 1553084427074.jpg (208.44 KB, 1600x900, marilyn_monroe_eye_roll_galore…)
>have friend who is kind of sexist
>calls women who point out obvious sexism feminazi's and SJW's
>freaks out at tiny racist jokes because he knows a black guy
No. 390843
>>390373She's Chinese an international student who's a sophomore. We go to school in a standard liberal college campus. Anything is possible but it's pretty fucking unlikely. I'm the same race as her and I grew up in a super white, Republican town, and I barely can talk about racism. Unless you're the kind of idiot who thinks that someone mispronouncing your name is racism.
Anyways, I think her level of disliking white people is way out of proportion with anything that she could have experienced in the last two years.
No. 390893
>>390850She's Han Chinese and is from China. How the fuck would you experience racism then?
>>390863Let me guess, you're also a SJW who is constantly
triggered from "racism"? Or are you a woke white ally who has a lot of white guilt? Give me a break
No. 390903
>>390893>Or are you a woke white ally[x] Doubt
lolcow is full of non-white girls if the discord and old chat groups have taught me anything. SJWs are increasingly a minority among whites, especially normal whites, as more of them move to the right/white nationalism.
No. 390909
>>390900Eh she's actually pro Xinjiang so it's fair. I still don't think she has any black friends though or would ever go to a ~dangerous black neighborhood~ like a lot of woke Asian people though.
>>390903So you're a woke poc who thinks white people are out to get you and complains everything you don't like is "fascism". No wonder you're
triggered.
No. 390917
>>390912I think there are a couple of woke FOBs and international students. It's not too common but I think they hear about things like racism and run away with it. I think it gives them a sense of oppression and meaning when they haven't had to deal with any of that shit growing up.
I think it's irritating for me to think that some outsider can come in and scold me about what I need to think. I feel like my friend is the type of woke person who thinks people like me need to pay reparations even though my family had nothing to do with slavery.
No. 390963
>>390909congratulations you’re fucking braindead. good job responding to a 3rd anon thinking it was the same poster as
>>390893, which was me, not the 3rd anon you randomly just decided to attack out of insecurity.
No. 391466
File: 1553693370227.jpeg (84.39 KB, 888x410, 1_iog26QeUREK1qrZRkjrfnQ.jpeg)
>living in a different country on my own
>I'm from Scotland, meet two girls who are from Ireland
>we quickly become a very close trio, hang out for days in a row, weekends in a row
>also very quickly establish a very close bond with one of them (A)
>personally start to become a little annoyed with the other girl (B), she's actually very nice and means well but talks way too much, a lot about herself, can't follow the flow of a conversation and CONSTANTLY forces polite laughs from people
>I'm basically being a total bitch I know completely I'm being too critical, but she just grates my nerves, often outstays her welcome when she comes to visit me just her, and just in general acts immature
>but as I said I am being a bitch so I never bring this up, just try to be patient, and really try to enjoy this new country and the fact I have new friends
>A rings me one night and lays out this massive 14 day road trip, involves hiking, camping, bars, new places, a trip on a boat, like she thought it all up and told me she thought it would be so cool for the two of us
>she doesn't mention B at all, never says a word about her, gives me every detail, she's so excited
>B messages us in a group chat shortly after asking if we want to get the group together again this weekend, A reads the message and doesn't respond
I feel like shit because she's so nice and we're here to make genuine friends with real people and have a great time but more than three hours with I nearly go insane. I don't even dislike her she is just painful to be around. And I know A feels the same because I have seen her trying to hold it in as well. The thing is this trip does sound so amazing and me and A have been having such a good time together. I really don't want B to come but I feel so guilty, like it's not even like we're lying, we just haven't even included her.
No. 391469
File: 1553694139072.gif (1.22 MB, 480x360, 1482957508438.gif)
>>391466fuck it and go anon. Just say it was completely spontaneous and be really apologetic she missed out if B gets upset.
No. 391473
File: 1553696161791.gif (873.61 KB, 498x372, tenor.gif)
Found out that one of my friends is an absolute dumbshit as a travel companion recently, and that I can truly only tolerate her in small doses.
I feel bad for having such aggressive thoughts about her because she does have redeeming qualities like having a good heart, but she drives me nuts with being so aloof, immature, and lacking self awareness.
What gets me most is that she has this weird laughing tick. She laughs to herself after seemingly mundane and unfunny sentences, when she makes a mistake, or completely at random. It's almost like nervous laughter sometimes, or maybe that's her brain trying to fill in conversational gaps like how people say "like" or "um."
I compare the sound of this cackling to the mouse Gus from Cinderella, because it's the best comparison I can think of without sounding evil. She sounds like that. She's like a living caricature of a dumb, albeit well meaning, Disney character.
No. 391485
>>391466Anon, you do you but I mean, I think it would be nice/mature of you to talk to B in some way and not just abandon her like that? She’s probably clueless and awkward and I feel like friend A is using you to get rid of friend B. This is all my opinion, but I get the sense from what you’ve written that friend A is manipulative and she knows what’s she is doing. She’s deliberately setting up this ‘girl’s trip’ shit as some power bitch slap to friend B. If B isn’t a horrible person, you shouldn’t have to needlessly hurt her and leave her wondering why two people she probably enjoys just up and went on a trip without her?
Like I said though, it’s your life though and you are free to do whatever you want but I’ve been friend B before and that shit hurts, man.
No. 391496
>>390952haha omg I've been meaning for someone to call me whitewashed. are you serious? I guess it would be better if an Asian incel beats me?
also most Asian female SJWs only sleep with white men for some reason. wonder why?
No. 392145
>>391939Nah anon, that's super shit on his behalf. You're not a bad friend. I'm depressed as fuck and whenever anyone tells me what they're doing like exercise and wellness I'm super encouraging and happy for them. It's very
toxic to put someone down for bettering themselves just because you cant or wont put in the effort to do the same. Dark humour and even depression humour is the best but this goes beyond that into total negativity, he has to wise up and stop being an emotion/energy drain. If you are good enough friends you could point this out to him maybe?
No. 392150
>>391939I have a friend like this and it's so exhausting to constantly walk on egg shells, trying my best to avoid subjects that won't make her fly into a fit of self-deprecating monologues.
>Me: I just got my hair done!>Her: I wish I wasn't so ugly, getting my hair done won't help anything because my face is so disgusting, I'm so jealous of beautiful people, I wish I was dead wahhhI have an issue with anxiety and having to carry her feelings and problems on my shoulders wears me out so badly and has a negative effect on my own mental health. I love her because she's my best friend of many years, but I really wish she got therapy for her issues instead of throwing them on me like I was a dumpster for all her emotional baggage.
No. 392184
>>392179What happens when you agree with them? Maybe you should just communicate the way you feel to her, or simply say "stop apologising, and just do better".
Some people really are just flakey against their better intentions, and they don't want to be that way and it's good to support them despite their limitations, but they have to accept what they are. If she doesn't actually like going out irl she needs to be honest about it, or if she knows she's too busy to maintain her social life she needs to accept that.
Perhaps if you guys talk it out in an honest realistic way you can come to a solution that works for you both, because if this keeps up then you'll fall out for good.
No. 392193
File: 1553869640614.jpg (29.83 KB, 400x384, 1552049769652.jpg)
>met great friends over the years
>suddenly last year they start acting up
>friends make jokes that belittle me whenever i post something on my own interests
>start feeling depressed about my art because my friend group puts me down
>they cease giving me any sort of compliments unless i do something that they like
>ask them to stop and they do… sort of
>they now start consistently ignoring me instead of belittling me
>BUTWAIT.mp4
>find out 10 months later find out that they talked shit behind my back in a private channel at the time
>they apparently all joined up and all decided to ignore anything that i draw or post about because i have "shit taste" too
>remember how i still felt depressed about art even after people stopped joking around
>no matter how skillful i got, i was merely ignored because of petty drama
>"They're just jokes, anon hates herself and that's why she's taking it so seriously!"
>Ok, fuck this
>leaves
>keep following their pages since they post interesting things
>friends that i kept from the whole thing talk to me and say my ex friends still consider me a friend
>hmmm
>a few months later I've calmed down and decide to talk to my ex friend who usually runs the chatrooms
>"We're so sorry! We knew those jokes hurt you and we should have put ourselves in your shoes!"
>we exchange walls of texts and i leave it at that, i'm grateful for their time and i say i'll think about it
>the conversation went pretty well actually
And that's where i currently stand… My current friends tell me that it was all a misunderstanding, but at the same time i know what kind of feelings i went through. I knew what i felt when i was being made fun of, and it was for an extended period of time too. I made it clear what i was feeling and yet i was ignored. The apology seemed pretty sincere however, so i have no idea how to feel. This has left an impact on how i think about my art, to be honest. I have no idea what to do next.
No. 392243
>>392233Thank you anon, up until recently i thought of these people as honest and humble and that's what's holding me back on my judgement… But what you said makes sense. If they regretted so much what they said and thought about it constantly, why did they never think on going back about what they said about me? It seems that they only learned their lesson when i finally went and left on my own. I'm still in a way conflicted, but i think that's just the attachment from spending good memories with them. Their apology is probably all smoke and mirrors, it's really well polished and sincere looking, but no matter how i look at the situation it looks incredibly suspicious.
(the channel created wasn't just for me though, but i understood what you meant)
No. 396874
File: 1554844098415.jpg (122.28 KB, 960x826, sjw.jpg)
>Met a guy in college who I thought was nice
>Started talking
>Always has at least one stain on his shirt
>Burps out loud every 10 minutes
>Quotes filthy frank every five minutes
>Still thinks 'Hitler did nothing wrong' is the peak of comedy
>Turns out he's one of those anti-SJW types
>Listed feminism as one of the top five issues threatening America
>Thinks the Battlefield 5 gender thing was important
I've stopped talking to him awhile ago (in fact I only started talking to him because I couldn't find any one else at that moment) and started hanging out with other people, but I just recently got a text form one of his friend saying 'I thought you were a couple' and 'if I liked him'. I said no.
>Said he wanted to go to full sail academy (that scam school) for art, but his mom made him go to my college
>His drawings look like a kids too
No. 396909
Known this girl for a few years now, met them at school and have a ton of mutual friends. Fyi, i lost someone in my family at the end of last year, got into an accident, still have to wear a cast, have mental health stuff.
>never once asked me how i was after the accident, even tho her sister who i barely know wished me a speedy recovery
>I try to understand this as her anxiety acting up or something
>she spends all her time on social media, i know for a fact she sees my posts about me having quite a shit time
>she also knows fully well when my bday is as hers is right after it
>it's a thing, trust me, they know
>she never wishes me happy bday
>tf man
>mutual friends also notice this
>agree it's odd
>a few days later it's her bday and i am at the hospital getting a new cast made
>spent basically all day at the hospital, phone turned on airplane mode
>forgot to wish HER hbd
>next day they proceed to vaguepost about me, calling me a bitch etc.
>some days later she dms me, blaming me for being a bitch and a bad friend for forgetting her bday, not attending the party even tho i am wearing a heavy ass cast
>told her I had other shit on my mind like my fucked up body
>mentioned she fOrGoT mine as well
>she crytypes how inconciderate i am, how i still should've come to her party and move my hospital date
>apparently i wasn't acting like i was all that upset about my accident, bday or my prior family stuff so it was ok for her to ignore it all
>…somehow turns into my fault
>admits she didn't wish me hbd on purpose
>left her on read
I have no fucking idea what is wrong with her, it all started around xmas last year when shit hit the fan for me. Prior to that I honestly was treated like a free therapist by them but never straightup shitty like this. I am over her.
No. 397027
File: 1554867242111.png (195.71 KB, 500x669, edgy-girl-who-resents-her-rich…)
> known her since literally the first day of middle school
> weird but in a quirky way that dips into annoying a bit
> known as the school artist and makes her whole life about that
> her mom works in the school and she's rich as fuck, has a guest house multiple cars, massive massive rooms and kitchen ( important later)
>jump to high school
>likes to latch onto mental illness based issues like its quirky despite not actually having any severe issues at all
> dating some annoying guy who is like high school protective and our friend group doesn't really fuck with him
> when they finally break up she writes this massive book about how she is dealing with life as a rape and abuse victim and how she broke down to our school consoler and all this stuff
> her end goal is to print it all out and then drop it off at this guys house for his mom to read.
> trying to be supportive but things aren't making sense and always seem to be more dramatic when she tells people about it
> i finally read her book, its legitimately stories of our friend groups trauma ( eating disorder, family relationships, self mutilation) that she had written to be her own.
> literally details a day we had spend together to a t and includes a scene where she purges the food we had made.
> I had been with her that whole day into the next and that never happened
> i'm still trying to be supportive im a high school and a lot less questioning then i am now
> around the time that " its kind of a funny story" comes out
> she's obsessed with it
> gets herself admitted to a psychiatric ward so she can be like the characters
> CONSTANTLY talking about it, making art about it like hyped to talk about something thats honestly traumatic especially if it's involuntary.
> ends up getting into a mad expensive city art school
> posting about " ugh i Hate being a poor college student and eating ramen" despite getting fat checks from her mom, dad and stepfather.
> starts pushing this like " i'm ethnic and poor" all over her social media
> she's Portuguese but we are from a area thats 98 percent Portuguese so when she starts posting about racism she's experienced it isn't grounded in anything
> wearing head wraps and nose rings and REALLY trying to sell herself as a middle eastern? spanish? idk
> posts about trump's travel ban saying its going to effect her
> her own mom comments and says that she's a legal citizen and Portugal isn't on the banned list
> becomes a vegan, shaves her head, dates a guy who can "see auras"
> transfers to a diffrent art college
> telling everyone she was on food stamp and grew up poor, centers her art around it
> posts about " all the people that bullied me in hs wanna be me now"
>there is so much she's literally the fucking worst
i haven't talked to her in years but she is so fucking loud on her sm that i still see stuff
LITERALLY this starterpack
No. 397050
>>397027Holy shit I know someone exactly like this, like almost to a T. >poet/writer
>A lot of her writings are basically fanfictions about randos we went to school with, even sometimes using their actual names>got a couple gigs writing for some magazines>claims she's so poor, while going to a private liberal arts college>her parents are literally paying for her education>Nonstop talks about racism>Is only attracted to white guys despite calling herself lesbian>got a septum ring and is obsessed with avocados>was anorexic for a while in high school, but she seemed to have gotten better>Now she's a HAESfag and IDK if that's any betterThere's so much more, but I can't think of it all right now kek
No. 425723
File: 1561393395386.png (26.95 KB, 254x252, 1501416510309.png)
I love my friend but she also drives me up the wall lol
>rarely pays attention when the topic isn't about her
>when the topic is about you/something else, it will immediately circle back to her again
>when I finished talking to everyone about a pretty traumatic day I had and how upset I was she started talking about how she ate hummus or smth earlier that day
>plays on her phone while you're talking to her and doesn't listen to anything you're saying; will pause then go "yeah" or "haha" after you stop even though it has nothing to do with what you said
>acts like a fence-sitter/peacekeeper but says some callous things, like complaining to one of our friends that she didn't bring drinks to her birthday party, even though she knew said friend was in debt and could barely afford food for herself
>never decides anything, always says "idm" "up to you" even if she has clear preferences or if she started the plans in the first place
>sends me paragraphs of boy problems at like 1am then immediately fucks off once she doesn't need advice/validation anymore
>will ignore your texts all day while responding to everyone on groupchats you're a part of, then use the excuse that she was too busy to text you
I wish I was less of a doormat but she takes any kind of criticism very personally and I can't be fucked to deal with it
No. 425756
>>397027oh my god this meme is fucking killing me
but it forgot "she/her they/them"
No. 425762
File: 1561397301766.jpg (23.48 KB, 564x752, ea24e7ead438e.jpg)
>>425723>rarely pays attention when the topic isn't about herI've known too many people like this and let me tell you that ditching them is the best decision you can ever make.
I hope you and other anons here can find better friends!
No. 427712
>be me, no friends besides high school weeb group I drifted apart from
>go to shitty private art college with classes of under 20 people, no clubs, no way to meet people my age with similar interests and not much time outside of college. Kind of a homebody to begin with.
>everyone in our classes just tends to keep to themselves or latch onto one friend out of convenience, myself included
>met this girl bc we both dress kind of alternative, She's a proper goth and into the subculture, whereas I just wear slightly lolita-ish stuff even though I'm starting to dress more toned down nowadays.
>besides dressing 'weird' we have nothing else in common. My hobbies are either weeb shit, video games or crafty/fashion stuff. Besides the goth scene all she does for fun is the normie partying/hoeing most normies do at our age. I'm not straight edge or anything but it's just not my thing.
>I used to try going to her parties and hanging out with her 'group' but I never fit in and the one time we both went to a con together neither of us had much fun. She was miserable bc it wasn't her thing and I was miserable bc she was acting bored by it the whole time, and I never got to do anything I wanted to.
>For a while she was desperate for me to slot in perfectly with her high school friend group, but it was awkward as fuck. She even tried setting me up with one of her friends bc he was kinda weeby but he was clingy af, basically 4chan incarnate and I realised I wasn't into guys after all. Stopped talking to him.
>We live far away from each other and despite her being the only one of us with a car she never wants to come out to see me, I always had to go to her.
>Eventually I just give up on being close with her and decide we can see each other in class.
>Still talk in class, things are fine for a while.
>At some point I've become the 'therapist friend' for her and it's really draining.
>She's stopped trying to have normal conversations and just uses me to offload about her ex and her bad grades and financial decisions, not everything is her fault but a lot of it is (keeps sleeping with loser ex and having pregnancy scares when he doesn't want her, keeps spending over what she makes in a week on shit she doesn't use then complains she can't afford stuff for school etc. literally brags about having no money bc she goes out so much like it's a badge of honour to be broke and irresponsible.)I try to give sensible advice but she never listens and always does the opposite of what I say.
>She isn't really interested in helping me through my problems when I bring them up either. Always on her phone, texting other people or just ignoring me.
>Don't want to be an asshole and judge her too much but it's getting more and more aggravating to listen to her shit when a lot of it is her bad decisions.
>Feel like I have to be around to support her even though I'm afraid I'm growing to resent her. We're both miserable in our major and have no one else.
>Realise I have nothing in common with this girl and wouldn't be friends with her in any other situation. Have dropped friends like her in the past and been much happier without them. She has a ton of other friends outside of college so it's not like I'd be abandoning her but I don't wanna be alone myself. Feels like trying to force a friendship with someone so different to me might be worse though.
Suddenly I miss my slightly autistic weeb friends from high school. They were kinda neckbeard-y but at least we had common interests to talk about and I never had to be their emotional dumping ground. I don't even know where I would go out and meet people with similar interests to me besides cons, which are all months away in my city. I really wish I could've gone to a bigger school with clubs and shit to at least meet someone, but I'm stuck in a tiny shithole doing a degree I hate. Sorry this is so long but I feel so alone and miserable and can feel myself becoming more and more reclusive every day.
No. 427913
>>427893You have no reason to feel guilty; it's your "friends" that should for obviously pushing your buttons and crossing boundaries, as small as they might seem. You're an adult, you should be able to pick who you hang out with at your own discretion, and if those people are causing you a lot of stress, you have the right to cut them out for a while or entirely if need be. They're already doing it to you by being late or using excuses.
Your read is refreshing, it makes me feel less alone. I have a hard time keeping friendships with people my own age because they're very flaky and irresponsible. I feel less guilt wanting to hang out with middle aged women; they're just nicer generally.
No. 427925
I keep getting into friendship groups that involve one of the girls trying to be the "Regina George". I stand out cause people tend to like the way that I dress and I've been street snapped for a few fashion blogs for it.
It's always the same cycle of them calling me pretty and skinny, then suddenly I'm too skinny, then I'm pretty again, then I'm "weird" ,then I'm "obsessed with Asians" , and then they look for a reason to mess with me and when I react it's "see see this skinny Asian loving bitch is an asshole!!!1!1!1".
I thought it would stop when I got to college but it only became worse and I got harrassed so bad I had to get the school and police involved.
In one friendship group one of the girls wanted to be the "ultimate waifu" and was upset that people would look at me more than her.she was overweight and dressed like how she thought kawaii Nippon girls would. Her boyfriend at the time had a crush on me and creeped me out and everyone knew but she took it out on me instead. She blamed me for her being insecure through text and I blocked her. We were roommates so she thankfully moved out but after words she did what the always do, single white femaled me. All of a sudden she was into kpop, sewing , magical girl animes ( she's didn't know what sailor moon was before me), singing , kingdom hearts, and tried to do "urban" kawaii like I do. She also lost a bunch of weight and started wearing wigs after she tried to embarrass me for wearing wigs. She also was uncomfortable around black people and would call me aggressive for simply going to the bathroom (I'm not joking).
That's the short version cause my history with friends has been awful. They didn't want to be friends they wanted a pet and someone to be superior than. And I try to not be be in my feelings about it but I'm human and it gets to me when I think about the things they've done randomly.
No. 427939
Nowadays don't have many friends. Have one good friend who helped me through hard times, however she manages to be a bit of a cunt at times, like pointing out my flaws, pointing to my back and saying "So hairy"…, or in other instances pointing out my acne, my small breasts, etc. She also criticizes my clothing choices as well, in fact the first thing she said to me when we encountered each other at our graduation ceremony was "This is not beautiful" while reaching out and feeling the top I was wearing. When i was helping her move back into her apartment after she was away for months she would criticize how I went about doing certain things she asked me to do, like how I was vacuuming or how I gift wrapped a present (random).
Although it has nothing to do with me personally, she has a tendency to gawk at guys she finds attractive in the least subtle ways. In one case she would rant to me about a male nurse who she went as far as to find and follow on Instagram, write a message and rant to me when he didn't respond. Mind you the nurse was about 50 years old and has a family. The way she handles men she finds in attractive in public is kind of freaky.
Frankly I'm perplexed how to feel about her, b/c she's helped me a lot when I needed it I feel I overlooked a lot but I can't wait for the next opportunity to call her out
No. 427949
>>427925What the fuck are you telling people and doing that you're visibly "obsessed with asians".
Bro.
No. 427956
>>427949… nothing? You've never met ignorant ass people before? I go to anime conventions and listen to jpop/kpop and only bring it up if someone else does (and it depends on who does) first cause I don't like interacting with other fans of those things (anime club was a nightmare in high school). I have no idea why you'd assume that I was ~doing something~. It was just another way for people to put me down. Some guys would say it because I wouldn't want to date/sleep with them and some girls would say it to keep guys from asking me out. I wasn't antagonizing anyone I was just minding my own fucking business. Maybe I'm just old so im the only one here that remembers when being a "nerd desu desu" wasnt cool and I'd be sitting at lunch not talking to anyone (in a skirt and a hobby jack t shirt so no I wasn't one of those "rawr puppykin meow I'm a Neko people")and someone would walk up to me asking why I'm reading a backwards book and then rant about how china is evil people are fucking stupid.The girl I was talking about would call her boyfriend her little Asian boy but then accused me of having a crush on every Asian dude cause her boyfriend liked me.
People said that shit because shitty people say shitty things and I'm very sick of the shit. (If you weren't being accusatory my bad I'm just sick of the shit it's gone on my whole life).
No. 427958
>>427949Do you think she'll realize
she is the annoying friend?
No. 427959
>>427913Thanks for the reassurance! I thought I was pretty good at cutting out
toxic people over the years, but it's so hard when they aren't malicious or even bad people. Just no self awareness or drive. I'm just glad my best friend isn't like this at all, and we talk a few times a month since we're both busy people. But we make time for each other every few months.
Maybe you and me will just snap one day. I hope you find some better friends too!
No. 427961
>>427958How I'm I the annoying friend? I literally just said that this girl didn't like black people and the other group of friends the school had to call the cops because they feared for my safety?
This is why I hate summeranons you people say the dumbest shit cause you're the
toxic friend that everyone talks about in this thread.
No. 427984
>>427970Whatever bitter anon Chan.
To add to what people were saying before about
toxic friends. You guys will find good friends along the way. Even though I've had to deal with a lot of shit I still have friends that I've been with for the past almost ten years now and we help each other when we need it and go on trips and all sorts of cool stuff. When people treat you like shit , even if you feel guilty about it, dump them. It's better to be alone than with shitty people.
No. 429490
>>428088>>428185I figured I should update. I’ve since ghosted this person because their bullshit got to me. I couldn’t handle the constant needing to rely in me and her mother only to act like a total asshole to both of us. It was stressing me out knowing I had plans with her and having to deal with her complaining about everything and creating excuse after excuse for her behavior. But the story gets crazier.
I ghosted right before we were going to go on a short vacation. Its pretty assholish, I know, but the fact that I was trying to plan actual shit for us to do while she acted annoyed at the smallest task (like copying and pasting the hotel address for me, asking her mother if she’d like to go somewhere special) just made me want to say fuck it and not go at all.
So I guess with a lack of someone to fall back on, this bitch gets in contact with her ex’s family. I was mutuals with her ex as well, and he sent me all these screenshots of her trying to reach iut to everyone. They live in the planned destination for her vacation, Osaka (where she had stayed for 6 months in that failed relationship.) They always hated her because shes a literal child in every single way. But in her delulu mind she thinks they enjoy her presence more than their actual fucking SON. So she sends a seperate text to ex’s mom AND dad, but they block her number and move on. Then, her ex sends me a screenshot of his chat log with her. No text, just a sole picture sent to him if the front of his apartment building. This bitch dragged her mom and her dog on a clear 30 minute subway ride from her hotel to go loitering in front of her ex’s apartment. AND had to get photo evidence to send to her ex. Luckily she left later on, so he had no confrontation from her.
I dont even feel bad for ghosting that psycho idiot now. Maybe she’ll take the hint that nobody misses her, and nobody is hung up on her. If anything, her ex is stunted from such a shitty relationship with her. Hope she has fun next week when she’s got to communicate with the landlord one final time and sign the contracts AND find a way to pay them a huge deposit so she can secretly raise her geriatric dog in her overpriced tokyo shoebox.
No. 429876
>>429490oh my god. you made the right choice
the mom sounds sweet but she's enabling her psycho daughter
No. 429953
>>429876Anon here. I swear I’m almost done with petty ranting. 100% an enabling situation, and she did bring it onto herself. Its crazy to see this woman being bullied by her 29 year old daughter. The same daughter who has only ever left home to go and try to live with some guy in a foreign country for no more than 6 months at a time before she comes crawling back. Imagine having your grown as adult daughter scream and throw a fit in order for you to give her money to go ~study in japan~ because ‘thats what parents are supposed to do’, only for her to insult you and treat you like a fucking retard everytime you act amazed at a temple or how different things are.
>”Wow! Look how interesting the design is on these old houses”
>”Well yeah mum, it’s fucking Japan?? Tf did you expect??”The only thing I feel bad for is the fact that the moms come all the way here only to have her daughter take her absolutely nowhere, besides places she’s been to in the past. “I’ve been to this convenience store! I walked to this small ass park once with my friend!”
I also left off the detail of her coming to Japan with 4 personal pieces of her own luggage. One of which was filled with those LINE bear stuffed animals that she likes to collect for some reason. I was trying to be nice and decided to help carry one because she REFUSED to use a luggage storage/delivery service when she knew 100% that her airbnb check in wasnt until 4pm. Her mom is lugging 2 suitcases behind her, ‘friend’ has one suitcase and her dog in a sort of baby carrier type thing in her back, and I’m carrying the giant ass XL suitcase full of teddy bears.
>”Waaaah storing my luggage is so expensiveeeee (7500yen) i dont wanna do it.>”lets just roll the luggage around the hot city till check in time while doing absolutely nothing and sitting on a stoop outside the station!”>”ughhh why are you even complaining anon? You chose the lightest bag, my moms got two bags and you have the nerve to carry the light one?”After communicating with her ex more apparently was always like this. I remember her being more chill 2 years ago, but I guess I missed it.
No. 429970
>>429938I had a fat friend come over to study once. She got so fucking pissy towards the end and outright was rude saying how we needed to stop and eat right then and there. I had planned on cooking when we were done. She ate out all the time so she wasn't used to waiting really either.
Thanks for sharing your story. I only eat when I'm happy luckily; helps keep me trim.
No. 430075
>>429809From last year, it was the first time in years I even traveled:
>suggest to friends we go on holidays at the beach one week>they can't or don't want to, except for one>she's can't stay out in the sun for too long because that's very dangerous for her health, I tell her I want to go to the beach to swim and visit touristic places in the middle of summer so she should be careful if she really is interested>"sure anon, I'm prepared don't worry">I also tell her I want to try a lot of restaurants so if she doesn't feel like she has the budget for that she shouldn't force herself to come with me>"don't worry about that anon, I have more than enough money for that">flash-forward to when we're finally at the destination>"anon I don't think we should go to (not even expensive) restaurants that often, how about we go get instant noodles from time to time or go to mcdonalds or kfc">"I really don't like the beach, I miss the montains in my region, the beach is for boring normies ugh lol amirite" at least 10 times a day>when I tell her I'll go swim at the beach and she doesn't have to follow me because of the sun exposure and because she doesn't like the beach she still forces herself to follow me and tell me that I stayed long enough, now let's do something else because it's booooring>when we're about to go to a really famous casino she loses her shit "nooo we can't get in it's embarrassing we're not rich enough, I'm scared uwu" even though EVERYONE can get in and just visit instead of playing>we're roomed with two other people, including one woman who was traveling alone and wanted to visit the city alone, friend tries to include her into every activity we could possibly do, when I talk to friend about things that only concerns us, friend feels the need to translate everything I tell her in English to the woman so she can be inserted in our conversations, making things very awkward>refuses to pay 2 euros for a ferry to take a really useful shortcut because she's cheap and she wants to visit another city in an "authentic" way, then complains that we walked several hours under the sun because of her health, even though I told her there was nothing interesting to do if we walked except eating in restaurants, which she doesn't want to doNever again. At least my other friends were straight-forward when they told me they wouldn't enjoy the beach. I want to travel alone next time.
No. 446041
>>446024>What the hell do you do when you‘ve got 2 conflict avoidant men as friends, with issues, but they refuse to talk about it and I live far away now so I can only watch the friendship degrade from afar?Nothing, they are two adult men who almost certainly don't want a woman living miles from them to threat them like children and meddle in their personal problems.
>For me, a blow up point was when our traditional christmas meetup turned into some family party including kids, and we had to leave at 7pm with barely a sentence exchanged with 2.It's perfectly normal that almost 30 y old men want to spend christmas with gf and her and/or his family, than with childhood friends.
>"OK I can see you for 3 hours in about 2 weeks time in between events with my gf and she‘ll also come along"Sounds like he want to cut ties with you and friend 1, but he hopes you can read between the lines or that friendship will gradually dissove if he doesn't spend time with you.
People change, he probably has different personality than when he was younger, and it's ok if he doesn't want to be friend with you anymore. I can't stand my childhood friends and they dislike me too, because we grew up to be completly different people.
No. 448883
>>269930It's been a year and she's gotten even further into skinwalking me, I don't know if she'll ever stop. She dyed her hair and even got contact lenses to look the same as me and whenever I post anything she's suddenly posting the same selfie, makeup, angle, outfit, goes and buys the same clothes, it's like she constantly needs to validate herself by trying to outdo me at being me and it's so creepy at this point she makes me think of Dasha. I literally can't do anything without her aggressively copying it and trying to do it too then getting bratty and having passive aggressive tantrums online when it doesn't get the attention she wants. My other friends have noticed too. She clearly dislikes me yet is so set on skinwalking me, it's so weird. She makes it incredibly obvious to the people around us when I'm posting something and then a few hours later she's posting a skinwalked version.
She's been called out a few times in the last year for being really fake and bitchy but I've never called her out on this because I don't want to open a can of worms. It's still really weird and uncomfortable, though.
No. 544124
For a small context
>friends for 12+ years, very off and on
>she had low self esteem, tried to buy friends but it didnt work but she spoiled me a lot in middle and school school
>has ignored me/blocked me for saying "fuck herbal essence" (because i was too negative?)
>has a habit of blocking/unfriending me when shes up to no good
> its suspected from mutual friends she was actually in love with me; looking at old cards she would often said she loves me; she came out as bi online and was upset when i didnt praise her and confess love for her or something.
>i dont identify as as bi or gay only an ally
>she makes many poor life choices, got married for military benefits, divorced because he was a compulsive liar, got quickly remarried because "im in love" and for in state tuition for university in her new state
>havent talked to her for a year
>she got mad i potentially couldnt come to her 2nd wedding (which was strictly the party part because she got legally married a year before for said benefits)
>i suggested i couldnt come because my wedding was the month before. However she told me the dates shortly before i told her mine; but she knew i was newly engaged and i had a certain time line due to us having different citizenships
Fastforward to now
>Corona got everyone messaging out of boredom, she messages me asking me how im doing
>Im fine; turns out shes doing bad financially both her and her husband got fired and her area is already a poor southern state
>we chat a lot; i kiss up a lot because i know i have to walk on egg shells
>shes mad because all her friends are traveling because stuff is cheap
>she mentions wanting to block everyone traveling and not taking it seriously
>my area is handling everything well, lock downs, face masks, regulated occupations in buildings and stores etc.
>she mentions wanting to move back to her family on the other side of the country
>family is in an area that really cant handle if theres an big outbreak
>i tell her she might be seen as a hypocrite if she moves, risks their health because she needs 3 flights to get "home" and at the same time blocks and shits on everyone traveling for fun/because its cheap.
>"maybe your friends didnt know any better in the beginning"
>i mention i was in NYC early march; we didnt know the state of this virus and we were out of there a few days before it was a risk area
>she traveled on vacation after NYC was declared a risk area
>she blocks me for saying its not fair to blame them if they didnt know; "i heard the words corona before i left for new york but thats when we thought it was no worse than the flu"
>she blocked me
>shes saying the whole time she traveled she never heard of corona virus until her hotel was closing the day that she left.
She has a history of also blocking me when shes up to no good; so it might be because shes now traveling and doesnt want me to know
No. 544462
>>544128KEK I laughed at that too.
Reminds me of a similar friend I had who blocked me because I made a tweet saying Norman Reedus was ugly because of his mole and weeks after she unblocked me and approached me about it when we hung out IRL, she said "I thought the tweet was aimed at me because I was making gifs of him for my Tumblr" lmao I didn't even know she had a Tumblr with that shit.
No. 544525
>>544509I think he was emboldened by the fact that I went out on a date with him recently finally , against my own good judgement, but it went nowhere so I thought that was that. I think that played in the situation. I just feel embarrassed for him tbh cause it’s not an excuse to be that cringey.
Outside of that he’s been a good friend, did some architecture work for my mom for free, has interests besides Netflix and traveling to 64324 countries like the majority of people I know and is actually interesting to talk to.
No. 544529
>>544525Have fun overlooking the massive flaw of him pushing sexual boundaries with you, have fun blaming yourself cos somehow going on one date makes it your fault for 'emboldening' him??
Girl get better standards for friends, the situation you're describing never ends well.
No. 544539
>>544505hang on, isn't facetime a video call app? so he's literally beating his meat just under his camera while you're on cam verbally talking to each other? this isn't a text chat we're talking here?
that's literally a sex crime, there's laws against making obscene phone calls to someone without their consent, even the worst weeb cumbrains in my e-friend circle have the decency to leave a call when it's coom time or at least not mention if they don't
No. 545022
>>544948Thanks I needed to hear this.
I am really trying not let myself start a thing with my best friend.
Don't want it to go nuclear but that seems impossible