/ot/ - Religious cringe thread

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Religious cringe thread Anonymous 08/03/24 (Sat) 11:14:54 PM No. 2120062

This thread is about is about the absurd, fringe elements of organised religion. Here you can share cringy posts made by religious people or tell us about any funny/cringe/interesting experiences you've had with them.

Anonymous 08/03/24 (Sat) 11:16:32 PM No. 2120066

File: 1722726991533.mp4 (10.27 MB, 720x994, rapidsave.com_religious_woman_…)

Anonymous 08/03/24 (Sat) 11:17:02 PM No. 2120068

File: 1722727022311.jpeg (514.08 KB, 1125x2436, tj69zxu2rhed1.jpeg)

Anonymous 08/03/24 (Sat) 11:17:51 PM No. 2120070

File: 1722727071457.png (510.65 KB, 720x827, i0s4lac35hgd1.png)

Anonymous 08/03/24 (Sat) 11:18:48 PM No. 2120072

File: 1722727128459.webp (19 KB, 578x205, 642p9y7ughgd1.webp)

Anonymous 08/03/24 (Sat) 11:19:47 PM No. 2120074

File: 1722727186507.mp4 (3.77 MB, 394x854, rapidsave.com_hard_to_argue_wi…)

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 12:04:32 AM No. 2120118

>>2120066
This is such sad cringe. Is she worried her husband is cheating on her or does she feel unsafe alone at home?

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 12:48:14 AM No. 2120177

>>2120066
Feels like she's trying to land a record deal

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 01:03:19 AM No. 2120184

>>2120066
Me when I'm in the kitchen alone at night and loudly blast clips of my husbando to pretend he's protecting me

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 01:10:51 AM No. 2120193

File: 1722733851118.jpg (62.92 KB, 500x666, 748e1ef3a1ea34ce38ca71cd3310e7…)

This is all so fucking gay. I hate that they erased female divinity and goddesses for this shit. I'd still be religious if I had anyone to look up to like Athena and not just a 14 year old meek virgin who never talked or did anything besides give birth. I loathe the Semitic races for not only forcing monotheism but making it so absurd and cringey.

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 03:43:08 AM No. 2120379

my own mother in law wants me to worship her because honor your parents or something. we were at a wedding, i got some food and she asked me why i didn't serve her and how that's what i'm supposed to do. i wanted to punch her so bad.

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 03:47:07 AM No. 2120385

>>2120193
i so agree, that's why I look up to gnosticism because it's the only ideology that isn't retarded and cringe and insinuates that abrahamic religions were made by a male entity who thinks he's god and is jealous that the goddess sophia made life and can give life. it makes so much sense

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 03:48:19 AM No. 2120388

Christians on their way to say "it's god's plan" after a pedophile rapes and mutilates babies

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 03:48:44 AM No. 2120389

>>2120066
i had no idea shayna found god

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 03:51:08 AM No. 2120398

>>2120193
Sometimes I really wonder what would have happened if that Jesus guy had like a stroke at age 12 or drowned in the Red Sea or something and the Romans never adopted Christianity on masse, how would the world look today? I always thought it was strange that Europe's indigenous religions were almost completely destroyed by a religion from the Near East. It's a far cry from how Aphrodite was introduced to the West from the East. If God is real, when I die I'd ask him if I could just be a shadow during all time, so that I could freely move between days and centuries and really see how everything went down.

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 06:37:45 AM No. 2120517

the nu-cath cockettes are about to eat you OP

Anonymous 08/04/24 (Sun) 11:13:00 AM No. 2120695

>>2120193
>>2120398
I'm not a christcuck by any means but historically Christianity spreading across Europe was a huge deal for women and it was mostly women who fought to spread it. Christianity was hated by Romans at first and one of the issues they had with it was that it gave women too many rights, like the condemnation of cheating on your wife. Of course this isn't to say that Christianity is "feminist" or anything like that but it was a huge stepping stone for European women.

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 10:40:02 AM No. 2122257

>>2120695
In my country Christianity absolutely ruined many things for women. We also had same sex marriage before Christianity and it didn't have to be a romantical thing, either. Like you could've married your best friend and lived cutely ever after kek. But we were horrible pagans so we were given the choice to either convert or die. Well, people are still not very religious and it's thought to be a private thing. As it should be. We don't really talk or think about it. Our original religion was animism and in a way I practise it. There's no harm in being kind and respectful to the nature and animals.

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 12:19:16 PM No. 2122313

>>2120066
I think God or Jesus have better shit to do than listening to that shit but ok girl, keep clapping like a seal in your kitchen

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 12:28:18 PM No. 2122319

Most religious social media accounts run by girls and women all give me immense pickme/LARPing vibes. There's this one called sage'sbible, a Greek-American who wears these gaudy outfits while LARPing as a "based trad orthodox girl uwu!!!". One of her reels is about how she was bi and eventually "found Jesus" and wasn't bi anymore. The whole thing gives me vibes that her fuckface parents got pissy with her for being bi and imposed all this Orthodox nonsense onto her. I swear Orthodox people are like the NLOGs of Christianity. More fucking annoying than Catholics.

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 01:25:11 PM No. 2122375

My Nigel comes from a catholic family although he has never believed in the church and doesn't attend. His younger brother is in Europe training to be a priest. Last week Nigel had dinner with his catholic mother and she told him she and his dad are going to Europe to see younger brother and they would have invited us, but Younger Brother and the mother think its inappropriate Nigel and I live together in sin so we can't go on their holy europe vacation with them kek. We also can't come on their family trip to Florida (that the brother isn't even going on) for the same reason. Not that I want to go on any family trips with these nut nutjobs anyway but it's hilarious there are still people living in 1964. I dont plan on getting married and my Nigel is OK with that. We dont want kids either. These people are in for a long wait and a big surprise

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 02:52:38 PM No. 2122477

>>2122319
they're snowflakes who think praying is like magic and saints are like minor gods
they remind me of kids who were into wiccan stuff who thought they could cast spells by drawing crap on floors

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 03:10:16 PM No. 2122504

>>2122477
I just love that Christians infight so much. Just proves how ridiculous and ineffective the whole system is. They can't even agree on doctrine, such as Orthodox people desperately trying to say that saint-worship isn't idolatry and thus heretical.

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 03:21:12 PM No. 2122512

File: 1722871272114.png (93.44 KB, 1911x363, christian.png)

>>2122504
christianity as a whole is a very masculine religion, where its god and his creation revolve around the narcissistic self-image of the male believer
so it makes sense that christians constantly disagree and fight with each other because everyone believes everyone else has to act and think like him

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 05:54:26 PM No. 2122880

I’ve been wanting to post this for years

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 05:55:17 PM No. 2122884

>>2122512
Degenerate wannabe Catholics are so funny to me.

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 05:57:56 PM No. 2122900

>>2122884
According to my friend they’re fucking everywhere on kiwifarms (because god stands behind drama sites I guess).

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 06:32:38 PM No. 2122987

>>2122900
Always find those far-right inquisitor LARPer accounts on Twitter so fucking funny. Some fat dumbass caping for a Middle-Eastern, Semitic religion. How very nationalist.

Anonymous 08/05/24 (Mon) 06:44:05 PM No. 2123016

>>2122900
I haven't used KF in years but they were annoying even back then. The news and politics threads were treated like their containment zones because they consistently had the worst takes on the entire website and would get triggered by EVERYTHING.

Anonymous 08/06/24 (Tue) 04:08:36 PM No. 2124323

>>2120074
yo this woman has infected my insta reels algorithm and I wish I could push her into a puddle every time I hear that stupid smug "amen" lol IDC if she clearly has mental health issues

Anonymous 08/15/24 (Thu) 11:54:33 AM No. 2137026

The fucking orthobros on X and their unironic belief in faith giving them magical powers is fucking unbelievable, it's 2024 and there are still SO MANY people who believe thinking hard enough and feeling special enough will give them supernatural powers. They're all so self-important and "special" in the same exact way, it's like they were all maufactured following the same exacting standards in a factory. They have the exact same social, cultural and political beliefs, it's insane that they can't see something off about this. Actual Orthodox Christians from Eastern Europe aren't like this at all. The Western "Orthodox" internet theology is probably a psyop.

Anonymous 08/15/24 (Thu) 12:18:40 PM No. 2137057

>>2120066
Gotta love the dog checking on her like "are you, ok? Who are you talking to?"

Anonymous 02/20/25 (Thu) 06:36:58 AM No. 2409164

Religious people are the biggest enablers because they think a prayer and fast can solve anything. My mom is religious it is the root of all her problems. She whines about how my dad doesn't put any effort but refuses to get a divorce despite not living with him for over a decade. She whines about how violent my autistic brother is but when he was younger she would respond to his tantrums by giving him what he wanted and treating his mental issues like demons that can be prayed away instead of just putting him in therapy. I moved out for college but now she complains about how he bullies her and is violent to her. I'm like you literally created this problem by refusing to just put him on meds/therapy and trusting in your woowoo god to fix his violence. She still refuses to put him therapy but she has time to drive him to a church and get olive oil smeared on his face. She is so stupid

Anonymous 02/20/25 (Thu) 06:42:30 AM No. 2409177

>>2409164
It's too bad she doesn't understand your retarded brother beating the shit out of her is God's way of telling her she's fucked up kek

Anonymous 02/20/25 (Thu) 07:11:48 AM No. 2409205

>>2409164
God made people who would become scientists who would develop medications and she was unwilling to accept God's blessings when offered. She doesn't realize that he operates in mysterious, roundabout ways!!!

maybe that will work

Anonymous 02/20/25 (Thu) 08:18:41 AM No. 2409256

I know angels aren't real because human women would've already captured them and kept them in their basements by now.

Anonymous 02/20/25 (Thu) 12:42:37 PM No. 2409357

>>2120074
The way she says "amen" makes her sound like a laughing stoner saying "ay man" instead of a bible-thumping god-fearing woman, kek.

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 08:55:22 AM No. 2410572

I don't really like to claim that christfags are lower in IQ but so many of them just cannot recognise blatant AI slop like is it the lead in their boomer brains or what?

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 09:03:59 AM No. 2410580

File: 1740128638795.png (1.95 MB, 1245x704, picture-1819633180.png)

>>2410572
>is it lead in their boomer brains
shh my child, it is Christlove®

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 09:10:28 AM No. 2410585

>>2410580
Images like these make me want to go back to doing AI stuff and making Trump x Jesus images with captions like "they hated me too" and maybe I can sell them to conservatards online on shirts or some shit. Market's probably oversaturated though

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 09:18:47 AM No. 2410592

File: 1740129527389.png (304.64 KB, 954x1287, alright-make-a-choice-so-tendō…)

>>2410585
Hmm probably not. A lot of Christians are terrible at graphic design and creative art in general. I see literally no difference between an atheist and a supply-side Christian producing and selling stuff like this. I think you'd do quite well

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 09:21:53 AM No. 2410595

>>2410592
Kek the fucking bulge. Hmm, I'll go for it then. I won't be shipping shirts from my house though, probably just selling the design on redbubble or an equivalent if I do.

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 11:54:52 AM No. 2410709

>>2410592
I will never understand Christian nationalists. They worship a Judean brown communist from what is now Palestine. How patriotic.

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 03:28:24 PM No. 2410876

>>2410709
only if you're being reductive. it doesn't really matter where he came from, his life influenced the entire direction of thought for individuals and society in the west for the next 2000 years. he probably was brown though.
>communist
what does Jesus say about economics or means of production?

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 03:40:59 PM No. 2410895

>>2410592
His bulge is holding up that cross.

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 04:36:49 PM No. 2410963

>>2410592
Is this the cover of a gay porno?

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 10:10:06 PM No. 2411508

>>2410876
Use your head. Jesus clearly wasn't a huge fan of capitalism and he lived in communes.

>being reductive
Do you know what nationalism is?

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 10:23:26 PM No. 2411543

>>2409256
kek this is pretty much what happened in the story of Noah and that's why god said "Time to flood this gay earth"

Anonymous 02/21/25 (Fri) 10:25:39 PM No. 2411545

File: 1740176739383.png (121.54 KB, 498x494, 1000032906.png)

>>2411543
Well if those feathery bastards ever come back the rest of you had better learn how to swim

Anonymous 02/22/25 (Sat) 08:33:21 AM No. 2412102

>>2409256
You mean human moids?

Anonymous 04/20/25 (Sun) 01:23:07 PM No. 2494079

Why do religious people get so upset when literal young children don't "appreciate" or understand the lore enough? My mum goes through phases where she randomly decides she wants to be a devout Christian again, which is fine, but today she got SO stressed and wound up about my younger siblings because "they're just excited for the Easter chocolate and don't care about Jesus's sacrifice!!" Like…yeah, obviously! They're KIDS! And then she went on a big rant to them about it which somehow turned into a tirade about muh brave soldiers in the war kek

Anonymous 04/20/25 (Sun) 01:53:55 PM No. 2494097

>>2494079
I feel like these people are just incapable of making kids interested because they only focus on shoving blatant messaging into their kids skull, instead of story telling and characterization of religious stories. I'm an atheist but had religious education in school and my teacher was a young nun and she was genuinely good at storytelling portraying these stories as interesting and that made me care about these stories and think about them on my own from time to time. No offense but your mom sounds pretty lazy in her Jesus obsession, she sounds like she wants the kids to be interested, for no reason, on their own and refuses to speak to them in a way that they understand and relates to them. Making kids interested in bible stories really isn't impossible or even that hard, people are just too lazy to actually do it correctly. It's either just reading straight from the bible with a bunch of words and terms that kids won't get, or completely dumbing down these stories because they think kids are retards kek.
>which somehow turned into a tirade about muh brave soldiers in the war kek
Haha, my great grandma does the same thing very often.

Anonymous 04/20/25 (Sun) 03:18:36 PM No. 2494161

>>2494079
My mother is exactly the same way, constantly complaining about how children only care about chocolate not Jesus and parents have failed by not indoctrinating their offspring. Whenever hot cross buns come to grocery stores in December here she acts like someone signed a warrant for the persecution and execution of all Christians. I fucking hate any kind of religious holiday because I have to pretend that I still believe in it all.

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 11:29:57 AM No. 2496219

File: 1745321397192.jpg (33.21 KB, 775x519, 1704308588299.jpg)

God aaahhhh, I hate Jehovah's Witnesses so fucking much. Stop bothering me and calling my apartment phone thingy, you fucking creeps. Literally happened to me 5 minutes ago, fuck them.

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 11:43:34 AM No. 2496226

did you guys know there is a subsect of christians that has handling poisonous snakes and drinking poison as part of it's practice

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 11:50:19 AM No. 2496230

Say NO to diabetes!

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 12:01:38 PM No. 2496237

Recently I got sucked into a rabbit hole of murican "born again" christians who see themselves as the only real christians and believe that catholics, orthodoxs and so on will land in hell. There are so many super young fratboy-looking missionaires just going around e.g. on pride parades, yap about jesus loving you and then pray for peoples foot pain to go away.
According to their logic all you need to do is repent, that's it, then you will be saved. If you don't, you will burn in hell, no matter if you told a lie as a child or are a murdering rapist. But that concept of being "born again" doesn't exist anywhere else on earth, meaning they think that out of billions only a handful of muricans will get to go to heaven. How crazy is that? At least normal christians like catholics reach over a billion worldwide (and believe that they need to behave correctly) but they really think they're extra special, so many of them also seem to be former criminals who think they're better than innocent women and kids because they said sorry to jesus. They of course also have beef with the black version of their exclusive club, the hebrew israelites.

And all of that started for me just because I clicked on one video of a cute crying guy kek

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 12:05:29 PM No. 2496241

>>2496237
goddam he's cute but why does he speak like hes black?

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 12:15:00 PM No. 2496247

>>2496219
Nona, I used to have JW people knock on my door, leave handwritten letters and phamplets, etc and one time I opened the door I wore this shitty gothic hoodie with an upside down cross on it, I haven't had them knock or bother me at all since kek. Next time they call can you turn on some Marilyn Manson or something and put your phone up close to it? Doesn't have to be that, you could answer the phone with "Baphomet's devoted speaking."

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 12:52:18 PM No. 2496266

>>2496219
>>2496247
kek nonna something similar happened to me too I was wearing some metal band shirt and somebody rang my door, I thought some delivery guy. I opened the door and saw them and immediately clocked them and just said "no, leave!" and closed my door. Since then at least for a year nobody came to ring.

Anonymous 04/22/25 (Tue) 12:58:25 PM No. 2496271

>>2496247
>>2496266
Probably a good idea, I'm already a metal fan so I have some shirts like that. The strange thing is that I live in Poland, most people here are catholic and already believe in Jesus being the savior and all that, so why are you bothering me and telling me about it? I don't know why JW are so autistic about trying to convert people from a Jesus/bible worshiping Christian religion into an even more culty/scammy version of that same Christian religion. The little competitions Christian denominations have with each other are so stupid kek.