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No. 171669
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I haven't seen the guy I've been dating for 3 months because of the really bad side effects of his new medication; he couldn't leave the house without having a panic attack. He isolated himself during that time and it was incredibly difficult to get a hold of him during that time. I feel like we've grown so distant. I was hoping we'd be able to get closer over the summer, but it turns out we won't have much time together since we'll be out of the country for a lot of time. I'm so sad.
I feel like it's over. I've tried so hard to make it work but it seems like some things just aren't meant to be. I think I need to just give up, but it's hard. I'm so weak. It's the first real connection I've had with a man and he treated me so well. We're compatible in a lot of ways, too.
But I'm just so lonely. I miss having something more than friends and I don't know how much more I can wait. I think I'm going to try online dating and go out with new guys. I don't want someone new, but I feel like I don't have a choice.
Thanks for reading anonettes
No. 171671
I really, really, really want dick, but not just any dick. I want relationship dick.
The thing is, I don't want to have casual sex, or a friend with benefits, I want to actually fall in love with someone and know they love me back before I have sex with them, because the casual thing has never worked out for me.
But all the guys in my small city are fucking scrubs, and I'm trying to not settle for someone just because they're nice to me.
I don't even know what my type is. There's no real pattern to it besides tall and lanky. I just…ugh, it's really hard to articulate it.
I tried talking to my best friend since high school about it and he basically told me I was stupid for thinking I need a guy to complete me (I don't tho???).
It's just these visceral loneliness and I can't make it go away. I'm happy enough with my life, I know it's going to get better…I just want it to get better now.
No. 171672
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I'm in an international LDR and I probably won't be seeing my BF for another 8 or more months. Since being "official" we haven't been separated for over 4 months so this is like, the final boss. I have to make enough money for the VISA to be accepted, I'll need about 4-5k and I only have about $400 in the bank currently. I'm currently unemployed, so… yeah, this will be fun.
On an unrelated note family members keep stealing shit from me and I need a damn lock on my door.
No. 171675
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>>171668I want the final fantasy world to be real. It upsets me to end to know I will never traverse the calm lands, never ride a chocobo, never become a salaried fiend exterminator and never panhandle in alexandria. I will never encounter malboros, ancient machinas or gorgeous silver haired, green haired, purple eyed magical people. I will never be part human part rat. Part human part summoner. Or an al bhed. I will never change dress spheres, I will never switch materia from my bangle to my weapon. I will never summon ifrit. I will never crumple down, succumbing to my wounds, and dissipate into embers. I would join the lifestream and soar in a cloud of shared conciousness, only to precipitate in a tonberry, and then be killed again.
Why live? What does this unmagical boring shit world have to offer me? A decaying dying world I can't even fight for.
No. 171676
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>>171675Our planet is already beautiful and there's so much to fight for, you just don't give a shit because you don't get the option of an expressive costume and an anthropomorphic sidekick.
Our reality is actually so fucking close to a FF storyline already it's not even funny. A planet under threat from a global evil in the form of religious institution/monarchy/corporation that wants to destroy the land and all its resources in the name of greed and power, and a minority few renegades desire to band together and so forth fight for justice and peace. I could name a million different causes worth fighting for, from palm oil to Seaworld.
No. 171680
>>171679Don't feel too bad anon. A complex inner fantasy life keeps me going and staves off depression. (Not even sarcasm) and I'm 25. Admittedly I do think aging makes it worse. You really feel like you should have had some grand adventure by now and instead you have to slowly accept that the rat race is reality.
On the plus side you could always go on an adventure with a wizard when you're 50
No. 171681
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>>171678>>171679Maybe when we die, we get reincarnated in the final fantasy world. I'll see you there friends. I'm sure you'll be incredible black mages and summoners.
No. 171685
>>171683>>171684You guys are right, but it's still hard for me to feel okay with what I do. I don't think I'll ever be able to have a normal relationship.
I'm a high class prostitute… My whole life is a secret.
No. 171686
>>171685Sure you are.
Go roleplay someplace else.
No. 171689
>>171674>everyone says you can't get addicted to it but you can. It is a drug after all. >It is a drug after all.I dont see how these are related? You cant get physical addiction to it, that is a fact. You can, however, get psychologically addicted. To anything.
If he is not ok with rehab, maybe suggest therapy? Weed is often used to self medicate anxiety and depression, maybe that is the case with him.
No. 171693
>>171692You literally said "It's still hard for me to feel okay with what I do."
I mean. Are you blind? You're very upset/guilty/depressed/angry about what you do. You clearly do not like it - people who like their jobs even half decently don't feel the soul-sucking depression you're expressing (eg: "I don't think I'll ever be able to have a normal relationship"). If you want a normal relationship and a normal life, you have to stop being a prostitute.