/ot/ - off-topic

I escaped by depression by taking diet, nutrition and exercise as one of my primary hobbies.

Really OP, idk what your own diet is like so I don't wanna judge or anything but treating your body right nutritionally and making sure it gets enough activity goes a long way in improving your general mood.

>>162774
Adult coloring books, I can't draw for the life of me and I've found that coloring tiny things in is very calming.

>>162775
This. Especially exercise. Doing sport, going out, heating good healthy food, sleeping a good night rest (no less, no more) and having friends / SO are all things that make you feel alive, and feeling alive is how you get out of depression. As someone who's recovering from crippling anxiety/depression I cannot urge you enough to do as many of these things as you can. Starting is hard but doing several of these tends to make the rest fall into place sooner or later anyway.

As for drawing, imagine you have many great drawings waiting to come out of your hands, but they're buried under a way huge stack of terrible ones you have to tediously get out of your system first. Practice makes perfect, so crank out hundreds of doodles and eventually you will get there.

>>162774
I got completely obsessed with cinema. I'm on a quest to watch everything worthwhile. Movies are becoming my life. I've always liked watching people, since it's the next best thing to interpersonal relationships, so watching people pretend to be other people is at least something. It gives me comfort. Sometimes the films even make me feel deep emotions I thought I wasn't capable of anymore so…

>>162777
When you're really deeply depressed, you can't make yourself exercise. I do, everytime I feel even a tiny bit better but those times are getting rare. I used to eat very healthy, was brought up that way and I still do, I just eat very little now. I have no appetite at all. I have no motivation or energy to get better, I don't see the point. I've tried it all, I used to really want to get better and I tried for years. From and outsiders perspective, it looked like my life was going well but I felt just the same inside. I don't have any sense of accomplishment. It's all the same to me.

>>162779

Don't wanna be "that" girl, but you CAN make yourself exercise Anon, but it's just very hard.
Part of overcoming depression is cutting down on words like that, like "can't", or "impossible", and "pointless".

Of course you'll know this already but overcoming depression, there is no big thing that will change everything, it's making lots of little changes to your life that impact it daily, like this one.

You CAN do it Anon, I believe in you.

>>162775
>>162777
>>162779
>>162780
at one point, i was exercising ~2 hours 5 times a week. now i weight lift for at least 1 hour four times a week and do cardio in addition to that.

my diet has been shitty, but for the most part, i have a healthy diet. it's a little high in sugar (actually from eating a lot of fruits like bananas) and sometimes too high in sodium, but i just go through phases of feeling too nauseous to eat, feeling constantly hungry, and feeling so nauseous that the only way to settle my stomach is to eat.

i want to focus on drawing and writing/rping, like i used to when i was younger, but i can't anymore. my focus has gotten worse, and i'm pretty sure i was depressed back then, too.

anyway, despite working out, i still feel depressed. i go through the motions. it's just a habit at this point. for a few weeks, i'll be really excited during my gym session and right afterwards if i've hit a PR or something. but right now, my lifts have kind of stalled. i've also gained weight. so now it doesn't make me that happy

>>162781
also, forgot to say that i'm someone totally different. i just wanted to add that sometimes keeping your body healthy with exercise, a clean diet, and good sleep isn't enough. i still get small anxiety attacks and burst into tears over nothing quite often.

>>162780
I know you mean well but what I'm saying is that I've done all that. I told myself that I can do it, I forced myself to do all these things, I went to work every day and really made an effort and worked hard, I exercised, I forced myself to eat regularly, I forced myself not to procrastinate, to go out, to meet friends in a regular basis, yet inside I felt just the same. After about 3 or 4 years I couldn't do it anymore. It didn't cure my depression, I just suppressed it. Now I feel alienated from myself all the time, I can't connect with my emotions, I have lost all amibition because I've seen that no matter how hard I try, the problem is me, there's something wrong with my brain and I'll always have to try harder than others to succeed in this society and it will never be rewarding. My brain doesn't seem to have the capacity to show me that I did well, I'm indifferent to compliments and criticism alike. I don't want to die but I'm not really alive either.

>>162774
I agree about the exercise. I got a job over the summer which basically forced me to go physically and socially outside my comfort zone. It was tough shit, but I got a lot out of it. In turn, I got to to work on my body, sort of explore a local city, get better sleep, eat better, make a couple of new friends, and pay for some of the things I wanted.

I have horrible anxiety and sometimes I would cry when talking to my boss, or shake when interacting with people, or have trouble speaking to my coworkers. I often didn't want to leave my bed at all and I was late way more than I should've been. But I started feeling…good. Not great, but good sometimes. And it made me want to cry even more because I realized what it was like to feel again. I'm nowhere near "healthy" or stable these days, but it's amazing what a summer job can do.

tl;dr, your body and mind are connected and that's that. Treat one well and the other will follow. Sometimes you gotta give yourself a push.

>>162778
I absolutely agree with this.

>>162774
I love escaping into movies and TV shows. For me it's not just about seeing a fictional story playing out but the production and development of cinema. After watching something I always do research on all the aspects of the creation of the cinematography,writing,casting, etc. You see it all being put together and it's just fantastic. When you break it down like that you find out something new each time and you can take away from that to make something new as well, not just films or shows either. It can start from an artist you admire,your favorite video game, musicians, or authors. Be inspired and let it go from there.

Pre-depression… I LOVED to read. I loved learning French. I loved to watch Anime. I loved to just be so passionate about things. During depression… I lost all of that. I lost the ability to care about any of it. I gave up reading, learning French, and watching Anime. I mostly just thought about hanging myself. I totally and completely isolated myself socially, lost all my friends. My only function in life was to go to my college classes and through intense and horrible anxiety, I made As, but at the cost of my sanity. My final semester of college I just completely gave up. I started skipping classes, and was completely and honestly unhappy. After I graduated, I tried to commit suicide. I failed (obviously). Went to a psych ward where I got to detach myself from all my depression and anxiety for a bit which was honestly… very helpful. I got a real kick in my ass to get my life back. I decided to get myself into something new, decided to try making logos and graphic designy shit for fun. I started going on a diet. I got off my anti-depressants. I got into a relationship. I started learning French again. And here I am today. I struggle still, but I am finally getting passion back into my life.

I hope my tl;dr story gives you a little hope that you can come back from the very edge and be alright.

>>162785
I'm just like that. I also log every movie I've watched. It's like a quest. I try to know every aspect.

>>162786
Read all you wrote, sorry for no really replying but I've got a question:
Was it the antidepressants that caused you to gain weight? I'm insanely afraid of that and it keeps me from even trying them. I never had weight fluctuations and I'm very slim. I don't want to gain or lose weight. It would freak me out so much, I can't even imagine.

>>162775
I've tried this and just ended up bulimic

>>162789
same, except it was anorexia in my case. not the "i'm so fat" kind. i was thin to begin with, i just ate less and less and got really ocd with my food habits and the less i ate the harder it got. all the while i could clearly see how spoopy i was getting yet i couldn't get my shit together because i was too deep in and too depressed

One of my bad habits when I'm depressed is watching stupid shit. Youtube channels, sitcom reruns, and it would just make me feel worse.
If you watch something, watch it mindfully. Pick a movie/show/anime you've been meaning to watch but always put off, turn off everything else, and pay extra attention to the story, character, animation/sets/costumes, appreciate it and don't let your mind wander.

With exercise, don't force yourself to meet goals that are too out of reach. I tried waking up at 7:30 every morning to go to the gym but that only lasted a week before work, classes, and everything else left me too tired and needing sleep in the morning.
Instead, have a regular schedule at least three times a week, and when you're feeling particularly low, get out of the house and exercise, even in a small way. Go run around, take a walk, run some errands, just move your body and be productive.
Also I love Libravox, it's a free audiobook site for public domain books. Download some classics to listen to during workouts/long walks/errands. I find that those and podcasts are comforting (because of the voices) and they stretch your mind!
When you have a craving for comfort food, try to force yourself into having something similar but healthy. I LOVE gummy bears, but if I'm craving comfort food, I'll try to get an apple instead. They sell some in the market here that are small and sorta pale red/whitish but are super sweet. If you want pizza, try homemade spaghetti and a healthy sauce. If you want potato chips, try lightly salted peanuts or popcorn.
Call up friends, ask if they need help with errands/homework anything like that, try to plan times you know are typical for low periods for social activity to distract yourself. If it's rainy, clean your house/room.
I'm currently in Dialectical Behavior Therapy and a lot of it is managing extremely painful emotions and depression. There's a list of helpful activities and distractions I can scan if anyone wants it.
The hard thing about mental illness is that unlike physical pain, where our first reaction is to withdraw away from what hurts us, like when you touch a hot stove, is that with mental pain we assume it's cathartic to ruminate in it because it's comforting and safe.
But you have to get up and do things, you have to make yourself, or else you'll feel worse and worse. It's like cleaning a house, you don't really want to do it, but you'll be happier and healthier when you do, and if you don't the situation will just get worse.

I knit and crochet when I'm feeling depressed. I just finished a really easy sweater not too long ago.
I play video games a lot too!

>>162792
what do you play, anon? got any recommendations for pc or ps3? or 3ds?

>>162791
>>162791
I love this, and I would love to see your list anon. Thank you for this!

>>162791
This is actually a list of really good advice. I have the habit of watching reruns of my favourite series to numb my mind but it's true that I feel really refreshed after watching something new and paid actual attention to it. Also I hate cleaning up and my apartment is a mess, but I start by doing the dishes because that's what I enjoy the most and move on to other chores after getting in the flow.

Usually a hot shower or just sitting with the shower on and soaking your feet in it helps me drive anxiety away. Every time I'm restless and anxious, I go sit in the shower and feel a lot better. The hot water relaxes muscles well and the sight and feel of running water is kind of soothing. I also try to spread out doing the groceries for each day of the week because it would force me to go outside and get some fresh air while walking to the store.

Also agreeing on the unrealistic goals like getting up too early and going to the gym. I gave myself half an hour a morning to tap the snooze button and switched the alarm sound every now and then to keep it "fresh" so it would catch my attention in the mornings. Small things like that to make the morning routine a bit more stimulating and relaxing.

I like to do sports. I have a goal in mind, i get to focus on improving my body, i meet people i wouldn't have know before, and i feel physically better.