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No. 332611

I’ve been here for quite some years and I know a lot of you have been, too. Surely a percentage of posters here are around 30, or over 30. For those of you that are - how are you handling it?

Share your successes, insecurities, and life wisdom. Share fashion and beauty advice.

How do you feel about nearing 30/being over 30? Have you found the incel cope about 30+ women to be true in any way? What were your biggest fears, and what are your biggest triumphs at your current age?

Absolutely no Zoomers allowed in this thread, unless you’re an elder Zoomer. Zoomer ageism is peak stupidity and we won’t have it here.

No. 332614

I turned 30 last January and honestly I feel absolutely no different than the last 10 years, if anything I feel like I've been flourishing since last year by daring to do new things and being more social and outgoing (this has nothing to do with my age). I've often been told I look younger than I actually am but I don't care, my appearance has never been a source of insecurity for me so I probably have it easier than most women. Also it probably helps that I'm a lifelong celibate and being volcel preserves me from having to deal with relationship woes, and since I don't want to get married nor have children I couldn't care less about my clock ticking. I'm just scared of old age but we are not there yet.

No. 332620

Thank you for your reply! I have around 1.5 years left before turning 30, and it feels like my life is ending due to the regular male rhetoric and media portrayals. It also doesn’t help that early 20s women talk about women over 30 like they’re hags. I have also always looked younger than my age, so I guess it’s not aging itself that is scaring me (I know I’ll look okay for a long time) - it’s wearing the “30 badge” and potentially being looked at as lesser because of it. I don’t want children, so that’s also I factor - because people judge women so heavily for that.

I’m not sure I’m content in my relationship, but now I’m afraid to consider leaving because of the idea that most men prefer younger woman (20-24).

I posted Taylor for this thread because she’s 33 , and to me looks even better than her previous years. Plus she seems to be thriving and really enjoying her life, more so every year.

No. 332627

I turn 30 in a few months. I'm finding that I'm most insecure about being a cringey womanchild at this age. I still really enjoy playing games and participating in fandom, but it's hard not to look around and feel like a creep who's overstayed her welcome when most of the people interacting with my fanart are at least five years younger than me.

No. 332630

If it’s any solace to you, I find it refreshing when women past their 20s still enjoy youthful activities and interests. It’s almost like they stay eternally young, it’s an ageless quality and not something to be ashamed of

No. 332632

I'm well over 30 (38) and I've arrived here as a result of being "terminally online" most of my adult life. I grew up really sheltered (religion) so the internet was my only outlet, especially socially (also homeschooled).

I was gonna go for a career in IT/computers but I can't stand geek culture.

I'm single. I'm not interested in a relationship. I got diagnosed with ADHD like a couple years ago, which explains why I just don't get excited for the same things normies are into. And why mostly what holds my interest is digging deep into complicated videogames.

Shrug, that's it.

No. 332640

I'm turning 31 this month and honestly, so far my 30s have been good! I don't really look any different than I did at 25, but I feel a lot more at peace with my body and my looks. I used to be very insecure about how I looked, but I realize now that I look totally fine and it's not worth stressing about. I regret judging my body so harshly in my 20s.
I don't really have any worries about aging because I know I will always be the same person inside and my age can't change that. I won't change myself to fit anyone's stereotype of a 30-something woman and so on. However, it is hard to see all the ageism out there. Young women think their life is over by 21. I feel bad for them and I try not to let it drag me down. Life is long, enjoy every part of it.

No. 332646

29 here. I really don't feel it. I dont care much about the age I guess, but I do feel a little weird when I remember how old I am yet still don't seem to know how to socialize? I am good at one off things. Just never could figure out how to just fit in somewhere. One good thing about getting older is that there does seem to be less pressure to be in constant contact with people, and the outings can be both goofy and mature at the same time. Time boundaries get respected a little more. I gained a little weight from some meds that basically do the ambien thing and I would eat a lot at night…working on it. Im bmi 26 ish maybe 27 I think. I really, really dont want to hit 30 being overweight. I used to be borderline buff, life happened then covid happened and now it is now and idk where my muscle went. Its floppy and I have more cellulite. I also have quite the collection of thick black chin hairs I suspect are part weight related, part age related, and part med side effect related. So I guess i am mourning the body I seem to have lost kek. But I am very motivated in finding a gym to get re buffed, its just everything around me is awful or really expensive. My 'career' is kind of a joke, kind of not. Idk. Ive made great progress for myself considering my personal circumstances, but, most people who go my pathway have me feeling like my business is basically a kids lemonade stand. My gray hair started coming in a few years ago, but this year the amount has exploded. I stright up love it. I love my bright silver strands. Cannot wait for more. Idk. I am both more lonely than I expected to be, but more secure in keeping my own company rather than embarrassed now. Weird times.

No. 332649

Early 30s anon here. I’m more comfortable in my own skin than ever and don’t think about my age a lot other than the occasional “wow time goes by so fast”. I feel like I'm getting by ok. Bought my own apartment and am self-sufficient. I don't want children, maybe I would have stressed more about my age if that was the case.

>Have you found the incel cope about 30+ women to be true in any way?

30 is nothing lol. I became single at 30 and finding guys was no issue (for those of you who are into that). Met my new nigel that same year who is a few years younger than me. Right now I feel like I'm probably gonna keep dating younger tbh so maybe when I’m in my 50s-60s it’ll be harder to find decent men, but by then I’m probably gonna become celibate anyway.

No. 332651

Am curious about other anons experience with this… I am one of those 'never sits in a chair properly' people. Quirky when youre 17, weird when youre 30 kek. But whatever. This year I sort of have to 'sit properly' in my chair. Sounds weird but it is a safety reason, I have to be able to jump up out of my chair suddenly if I drop something that is very hot. I work from home sometimes I take my shoes off and cruss cross my legs but that isnt not safe. My entire leg, sometimes both, fall asleep within minutes. Im not exactly sedentary, but also not super active. Its straight painful. Is this an age thing? Ive never had to sit normally like this before to judge if it wpuld have happened all along or is something I am experiencing due to aging kek…I get up a couple times an hour to walk and stretch and do wall sits etc. I find a hard metal folding chair is actually the least likely to make my legs fall asleep and a cushioned one is most. Still happens way to quick and often. Did I fuck up my nerves by never sitting properly so they grew in a weird way??

No. 332654

32 and just enjoying a peaceful chill life.
I feel more confident than I was when I was younger, I guess now because I know what I like, don't like, not afraid to tell men to fuck off, and make enough money to travel, work out, and pursue hobbies. Got lucky to marry a chill partner who also doesn't want kids, so we're just enjoying life and saving for retirement.

So far aging hasn't bothered me, maybe because I still look young so it hasn't hit me yet. But also for a long time I've worked out, eat healthy, yoga, and focused on skincare over make up. So I don't feel physically different neither, just happier now that I have muscles. So the earlier you can start some sort of any physical activity, the better you'll feel when you get older.

And I've noticed as I reached 30 I've gotten a protective eye over younger girls out in public when creepy moids go near them. The advice I want to and try to give to any young girl is don't do hook ups/one night stands with any dude, nothing about it is worth it. You're not going to orgasm, it's dangerous, and chances are he's a loser. Especially since redpilled scrotes are so common now.

And I guess these days I've been reminiscing about my childhood. I think being a kid in the 90s was the sweet spot. Young enough for a normal healthy childhood before technology got big but then got to enjoy internet/tech in pre-teens. Thinking back on N64, playstation and ps2, 90s anime, 90s movies, children cartoons, Adult Swim, Toonami, etc. I dunno how zoomers feel about their pop culture, but I still think the 90s was the best kek. But now parents just put an ipad into their toddler's hands asap, and seems like gaming addiction is on a new level so people are losing socialization skills. Rip 90s

No. 332660

It's fine. I finally got a couple visible wrinkles around 32 years old which was novel. I took a break from the smoking and drinking that I did daily in my 20s and damn I feel stupid about that because I felt sooo much better when I stopped. Cursed knowledge though because I still indulge I just feel bad about it now. The thing about nicotine making you more anxious not less is true. I felt like there was a big mental shift for me around 28 where things started to make more sense, like I got the ability to reflect on the past in a new way.

No. 332667

>I got diagnosed with ADHD like a couple years ago, which explains why I just don't get excited for the same things normies are into.

There is not a more normie mental illness than adhd, what are you on about?

No. 332671

i'm 31, I don't feel any different mentally. i'm in way better shape than i was in most of my 20's, and i don't drink anymore because i just stopped craving alcohol entirely. literally nothing else is different, 30 is just an arbitrary number that doesn't really mean anything.

No. 332674

I'll be turning 30 next year but I haven't felt particularly different since I was a teenager. Some things that concern me is my fashion and interests I guess. I don't really like super mature looks on me I prefer more feminine and cute styles with bows, ruffles and lace. Of course pink is my favorite color as well so I'm afraid that I'll end up not "dressing my age" but I really don't want to care about any of that. I'm a huge fujo too and I've been told that I'll grow out of it eventually but I don't think it's ever going to happen. I do feel quite alienated though since most women seem to move on from this kind of stuff as they get older and I don't like interacting too much with people under 25 despite my personality and attitude seemingly still being stuck in my early 20s

No. 332675

>No career

No. 332676

This isn’t a thread for criticisms especially involving age, just honest and open thoughts about yourself and your age. Judging someone for doing or not doing something at any age should not be tolerated here. You wanna talk about careers or lack of, make another thread. Next.

No. 332677

I’m the same way with fashion. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wearing whatever you like - what’s odd is when people dress in styles they obviously dislike just to fit in. It’s almost like people can tell you’re just not being yourself. People look best in what makes them happiest, end of story.

No. 332678

hello fellow homeschool victim. didn't know there was more than one of us here.

No. 332679

i've read the post you're replying to like 6 times and i can't find where she said she doesn't have a career?

No. 332685

why doesn't anyone ever talk about how food tastes better as you get older? when i was younger spicy food had no flavors, it just hurt my mouth, and mixing different kinds of intense flavors (like ketchup + mustard) would make me gag sometimes. i feel like i get to actually experience all the flavors of food now instead of just the most powerful ones.

No. 332686

Same, I'm 30 and I still dress like it was 2005 (low rise skinny jeans and band shirts), mostly because it's the things that fit me and I don't care about trends, I've incorporated more elements in my outfits but the fact that I still wear some clothes from high-school is telling lol. I'm also still a yumejo and the older I get the less interested in moids I become, I wonder how I'll be in 10, 20 years…

No. 332692

I enjoy a much wider range of foods now but the taste-change happened in my twenties not thirties. The only benefit I'm getting with my thirties is just from the experience of having eaten and cooked more things. I can tell why some food is bad (like in what way someone cooked it or what cheap ingredient was used) and I've tasted better food than I thought I could taste. Honestly it's a double edged sword because some of my old favorite treats taste crappy to me now… I'll never enjoy kraft mac again.
I used to think it was just something my dad complained about but now I too genuinely think almost everything has too much salt in it. I love salt but it's ruining some foods.

No. 332716

Today my mom said that your 20s are much harder than your 30s and she had a much better time during her thirties. I really hope that's true because I'm mid 20s and this shit is SO HARD. 30s nonas, what do you think?

No. 332720

>the exact ages of me and my grandmother
Gross, I hate moids

No. 332727

I freaking love taylor, great thread pic, I'll keep this thread unhidden just to see her every time I enter /g/. Sage and spoilered for fangirling

No. 332732

29 and spent the winter months freaking out about it, but I’ve calmed down since. I think what was getting me was the fear that I will continue to not want to pursue a relationship with a man and/or have a kid until it’s too late for both and then I’ll want it more than anything and feel like I ruined my life. I’m still kind of worried for that, but have decided to do what feels right for me and that’s working on myself and being alone—if it turns out I was wrong to do so, I guess I’ll cross that bridge when it comes.
I feel like it’s become a little easier to be healthier as far as exercising and not drinking goes as I’ve aged, but I’m still shit at food. I hate cooking and eat out and easy things all the time and I’m worried I’ll get fat in my 30s if I keep it up.
I wish I hadn’t wasted half of my 20s in an awful relationship with a walking nightmare of a person, but otherwise, my life is already way better than at any other point in my 20s and I have no regrets. I think I’ll just keep getting comfier and more confident with time and I’m ready for it.
Also OT, but do you guys feel like it’s rare to randomly meet people the same age as you? Is it just part of adult life where everyone your age-ish is a few years older or younger? I was born in the first half of 94 and I just feel like it’s maybe unusual how uncommon it is for someone to be the same idk

No. 332745

I'm turning 30 next year and it's… weird. I never thought I'd be this old. I always figured I'd be dead. I think I've really grown emotionally and socially over the last decade but there's still more to do lol

I still live at home because we're in one of those crazy rental markets and a social worker's salary just won't cut it. (Fun fact, there's multiple social workers and human services employees on public benefits in my county!) But I'll be getting a raise next year and if things don't get worse (kek) I'll move out. I was on my own in college and liked it. It's just leaving my family behind for real is strange and foreign to me.


Hey, 94 baby! I'm a late 94 but yeah, once you're out of high school, it's hard to meet people in your birth year.

No. 332753

my sister in law shares my birth year but we are in such wildly different situations I don't feel like she's the same age as me (our personal lives are equal sort of but she has a PhD and just feels more grown up to me). Literally never met anyone else born my birth year (not even school because I skipped a grade and then got homeschooled which sucked).
That's something I wish I did in my twenties but I was just too scared: go to school. Get an associates or something. Maybe my thirties will be the time….
Sort of on-topic: the way there's a 5-minute shorts show called Turning Girls about "girls who face a battle against the turning point of their lives" (turning 30) and the finale is ridiculous and makes fun of expiring when you turn 30 if anyone wants to watch it (start at the beginning if you want to know the characters, it's short and one of them is absolutely a cow).

No. 332776

What a nice idea.

I'm 37 at the moment, honestly didn't really realise my change from 29 to 30 as I've been going strong with depression, self-harm, ED, alcohol and bullshit like that. It only hit me some years ago well into my 30s that I'm doing and feeling better than before, I'm calmer, I don't care about most of the bullshit and stupid people around me and I've learned to ask for help when I need to. I'm also mostly cured from all this things destroying me while younger and that's a big relief.
What I still don't get is having children and the need to "dress your age". I've been thinking about it a lot lately after a class reunion and most of them had children by now, but it just isn't something for me and I'm very much okay with it. Dressing my age, well, no, I will continue wearing skinny jeans and band shirts (and sometimes galaxy leggings)
The most important thing I learned so far is that you are never too old to change and learn. I finished my apprenticeship in my early 30s, got another degree a year later and still think about going back to university because I fucked up my degree years ago with all the mental health shit going on at that time. As long as I'm breathing I can change things and learn stuff.
The only thing I'm sad about is the lack of people that are like me, without family, children, just free. I sometimes miss being out at night, going home in the morning and not caring about a thing in the world. And I regret being poor and not having a house with a garden by now, kek.

So, my advice to nonnas turning 30s, it's not so bad. Honestly, my mental health issues got way better and other women my age confirmed that, you will be more confident and know what is going on with you and you really don't care about a wrinkle here or there. One sad thing is that you will lose people along the way and it will hurt and you will remember them but that is just life.

just wanted to say Hi, nice to see someone here that is older than mid 30. Hope you are doing amazing.

No. 332789

turning 32 next month. so far, i can say that my 30s are shaping up to be much better than my 20s!

it's nice to see that there are other posters close to me in age.

No. 332793

Just chiming in to say I’m 30 and besides being physically weaker due to my own laziness, I’m somehow at my peak. Putting in the work in my early 20s paid off and I still have a good physique and muscle tone. I didn’t start taking care of my skin (properly) until I was like 27 but luckily my genetics (and the fact that I couldn’t afford to go tanning back when that was trendy) carried me to having good skin. Anyone approaching 30 please don’t freak out because life is good!

This is true for most people, including me. But it just depends bc obviously someone can fall onto hard times at any point. At 30+ though you’re better mentally equipped to deal with things.

No. 332795

the only thing i'm worried about is my smoking habit that will make me look older than i am

No. 332804

eh, not that well, honestly. it's just that I am soon getting treatment for a crippling disease I had most of my life but didn't find out what it was until recently. I also have a speech disability, am an autist (diagnosed) that has never even talked to a guy before, and I'm scary-looking. Aging is great imo when you have eggs in all sorts of baskets. I hope the treatment will give me a second lease on life because everything else is quite bleak.

No. 332807

I actually can't believe i am turning 27 this year. It feels unreal. I wasted so much of my 20s and teen years being sad and I want the remainder of my 20s to be happy and I want to get healthier before becoming 30.

No. 332809

I've been trying to find women who are 30+ or at the very least 25+ in my fandoms, I wish they were easier to find. I tend to be wary of public Discords since I hate having to walk on eggshells around gendie/shipping anti types but it still bums me out when the rules have an age limit like "18+ but no one over 30" even though I don't really want to talk to the vast majority of 18-24s anyway.

When I was in high school, the cool and respected people in my fandoms were the ones in their 30s happily posting their fanfics and fanart, but now it seems to be the other way around where now they're reviled and seen as automatically "creepy" or "have taxes to pay/kids to raise" even though most of us want to stick in our own corner and have been in these communities for over a decade anyway.

No. 332812

I'm 33, but I haven't had friends since elementary and have been a shut in neet for the past decade so I don't feel that old at all. Especially since I don't want to get married and have kids and have never been in a relationship.

No. 332819

Same anon, the only difference is that I am not a neet.

No. 332820

Same except 27

No. 332830

Jesus christ anon, in the kindest way possible, please snap out of it. Deranged trolling has skewed your perception of desirability. The idea that you’re too old to risk leaving a relationship is part of the incel cope for actually unwanted, unsavoury men. Sort things out with your partner and break up if needed. You don’t want to be miserable in the future saying “I married my husband because I didn’t think I could get another boyfriend at 28”. Do whichever so you can come back to reality and rebuild your self esteem.

And stop taking obvious lies meant to insult you at face value or as the truth. It’s group effort negging to make you easier to trap because men fear joining that huge population of leftover men (demographic most prone to suicide). Literally all straight men are attracted to 30s women, it’s just bitter resentment and posturing that make some say otherwise and you don’t want to even know those types, so don’t worry about their rhetoric. You won’t have trouble dating. Any jaded incel will tell you that when his rage settles back into sadness. Old men stuck on “20-24” y.os aren’t looking to treat any woman well either.

Finally, instead of fearing 30 and feeling old when you’re not, picture yourself decades ahead looking back on yourself today. Do those felt limitations still make sense? What would actually make you happy to do now? Sorry if I was condescending, I just can’t stand seeing the manipulation grip women.

No. 332837

I'm turning 28 very soon and for the most part I'm not worried. I'm living somewhere away from my hometown, in a group house but I really like all my roommates.

I'm employed in a sector I want to build a career in, and I'm making strides with my mental health with regular counselling.

The only thing that gets me down is that I haven't been in a "real relationship" since I was 15/16. Inb4 someone says that wasn't a teenage relationship isn't real, but we dated for a year, I was there when his mother died and we lost our virginity together so idk it felt real to me.

In that time I didn't have sex for about 9 years, and since then I've only had one/two night stands. I'm trying to put myself out there by using dating apps regularly, but as we all know 90% of those people ghost you and everyone I've met from apps has been incredibly mid (hence the one/two night stands).

Everyone I meet organically offline is already in relationships so it feels like all the good ones are already taken kek.

I'm uncertain if I want to ever settle down and have a family, but I would be lying if those thoughts really haven't started cropping up more and more in these last few months.

No. 332838

my 00s sucked, my 10s sucked more, my 20s sucked less but still sucked and my 30s gonna be good.

No. 332842

Aging is only bad if you have nothing going on in your life. If you have a career, a job or at least interests you're improving yourself at aging won't be scary at all.
Even reading through posts you can see that the only women who are afraid of aging are the ones who are obviously not happy with how their lifes are at the moment. Aging on its own isn't a bad thing and I wish you guys would realize the issue isn't that you're 30+ but that you have no friends, no social skills and no qualifications. You've spent your whole life oin online spaces doing nothing and instead of coping, you should quit and go outside.
Stop posting on lolcow. Stop going on 4chan. Shut your computer down and go do something with your life. It's really pathetic to be 30+ and have nothing in your life.

No. 332849

Something interesting that happened to me once I hit 27ish. I started returning to my old/true self. Like waaay back me, age 12, peak cringe, no concept of existing for the male gaze or masking. Obviously I don’t have the mind of a child but it’s my personality, like I was asleep this whole time and woke up. I get angry sometimes by all of the horrors derived from me being a fake version of myself through my late teens and 20s. Attracting disgusting people and trauma in the hope of being liked. As you get older something just switches and you don’t really give a fuck about being liked by losers anymore. It’s nice.

No. 332850

Completely agree anon, I'm turning 29 soon and my mental health and emotional stability improves every year, it's incredible how few fucks I have to give about others perceptions of me, and I look forward to losing even more fucks as the years go on

No. 332862

This post isn't about aging.

I never used to have it in my head that I was raped, because I blamed myself for it. Even though I said no many times and tried to push him off, I somehow got it in my head that I sent the wrong signals. I was married to him, after all (I got married before I was 21, do not recommend.) I was reading an article on rape in history and it seems so cliché but all these things flooded in. I have an impeccable memory and yet - my brain hid these experiences from the common record. It took that article to make me remember so much. I've been raped. I've been assaulted prior to that. Numerous times. I've never given enthusiastic consent to a man aside from a handful of times (trying to make marriage work - can't call that anything but mutual, though I hated it). I was a virgin when I got married. And now I don't even know if I have a sexuality.

Why were we blamed so much for what men did to us? Why was our childhood and coming of age a miasma of guilt and shame? I am not envious of younger women but dismayed that in my 30s I see how abused and neglected we were as young women. How I was brought up to feel only shame, despite being a "good girl." I got married to an abuser to escape an abusive household environment. And now I'm alone. I don't care how old I am now. I care about those of us who will never have the support we deserved. It's just so sad.

The romanticization of mental illness and trauma among well… people my age and younger, too, has also made it harder to feel OK about asking for help or addressing some of the wounds. I guess it should feel easier, but instead it feels like if I got through life this far, I should be able to continue.

Do we ever get to stop sacrificing and compromising for a little while? Sometimes I look back at things I have accomplished and I can't even acknowledge I did them. It's like I have no idea how I produced those things. That's not dissociation or anything, just a profound and perpetual inadequacy no matter what. Is it that people our age needed external validation to thrive? and if we didn't get that, if we hopped from abuse to abuse to demented boss to demented superviaor, we ended up so fucking broken and sad that we can't even own the products of our own toil? I can't relate or respond to any of these self-empowerment things: they are all so fake and shallow. Am I too old? Too aware? How do you fix this mindset of never feeling good about yourself as a 30+ woman?

No. 332875

It's irritating when you have a legitimate mental illness you had professionally diagnosed and treated, you open up about it a little among people you know and trust, and some fucker with an anime profile picture who won't shut the fuck up about breakcore and Lain is like "Yeah man, I'm also really fucked up; I'm a twisted cycle path too!"

No. 332880

I’m not sure how to help you, but I wanted to say I had a similar experience and you’re not alone.

I was 20, about to turn 21 when I started an immediately serious relationship with a 33 year old. He raped me on Christmas. It took me a while to understand it was rape - he was upset about an ex that he last heard from around Christmas. I was tired and high, I didn’t want sex at all. He forced himself on me despite my being obviously uninterested and very annoyed about it. I sort of just laid down and let it happen after a few minutes of light struggling and saying no. I remember thinking afterwards “was that rape?”. Brushed it under the rug and stayed with him for another three years. I wish I had respected myself more between the ages of 20-23. I’m 28 now. Wasting my early 20s with that guy is my biggest regret. Should have been enjoying myself instead

Another horrible aspect of that relationship - while I was drunk on one of our first nights together I let him give me a small stick n poke on my hip. He carved his name next to it with a knife. I thought it was so romantic and edgy, since he also said that way nobody would want me again knowing I belong to him. The next year I let him do the same on my knee, again while fucked up. Now I have to live with those and see them every time I take off my clothes and it makes me sick

No. 332885

This is the best part of being over 30 for me. I think the fact that my 30+ IRLs tend to be sticks in the mud and convinced that their life is over makes me want to be more openly "me" to show you can still have fun. I don't even consider being over 30 old, I feel like 45 or 50+ is what's really old. Why are we arbitrarily deciding our lives are over?

No. 332889

If you look at some famous actresses, some got their best roles in their 30s, not their 20s. Not only that, they look absolutely elegant and just as beautiful as they did in their 20s. I think about this a lot. 20s are essentially a continuation of teenage years, brain forms around 25, then 30s are the true prime years if you care for yourself in your 20s. Moids/incels love 20-somethings because they are essentially close to being teens, naive, easier to manipulate, and less sure of themselves. It’s a sad fact but also empowering. So many women simply blossom in their 30s. I look at photos of my mother in her 30s and she was absolutely stunning, so elegant and beautiful, and if one didn’t know her age you could assume she was 25 throughout the entire duration of her 30s. Nearing 50, and she is still gorgeous, with the added aspect of looking wiser, calmer, and kinder. Imo women aren’t even old until 50.

What really irks me is the zoomer generation and their obsession with “old” people - they seriously act like 25+ is geriatric. I wonder if any of them have the self awareness to recognize they’re right behind us, and their 20s will fly by. I hope they’ll be able to cope okay when they start hitting that milestone… it’s sad thinking all around.

No. 332891

>As you get older something just switches and you don’t really give a fuck about being liked by losers anymore.
Yes. To the young padawans lurking itt, that right there is the best part of aging. You just don't give a fuck. You carve your own path. It feels great.

No. 332893

We should start including photos of our favorite actresses, singers, models, seriously whomever is 30+ and inspiring in this thread. So many amazing women over the age of 30. Taylor Swift is obviously killing it. Lana is in her 30s and simply thriving. Phoebe Bridgers (iirc) is around 29, and absolutely stunning and growing more and more popular by the day. Anyone have any 30+ fave ladies they’d like to share?

No. 332898

I felt very old seeing a teen in public wearing a 3 cheers for sweet revenge hoodie. I told her in passing I was at the show and she said “I wish I was alive then
That made me feel old kek. But beyond that, dirty thirty is doing me well. I dont mind getting older.

No. 332900

It really depends on where you are in life, but generally this is true for the average person because by 30 you likely have a set job and schedule, some savings, a stable living situation. 20s, especially early 20s is often full of moving for college, moving for career, job switching, financial insecurity. Of course those can happen to anyone at any time but 30s is where most people have started to become stable. Life experience too, you stop being as stressed about little things or know how to handle situations better in general

No. 332906

how are heavily edited images of manufactured women supposed to be inspiring? like of course whatserface is thriving, she's RICH. WHO CARES

No. 332908

This makes me want to throw myself into a fire, I was 13 around the time of MCR. Also who else actually hates teenagers? I can’t stand them, they’re narcissistic, evil little shits who think the world revolves around them

No. 332910

Lol calm down this random teen didn't do anything wrong.

No. 332911

you sound miserable

No. 332915

At 13 you were 100% just as cringe as the kids who like mcr now

No. 332916

>narcissistic, evil little shits who think the world revolves around them
Pretty sure it's you who's making everything about yourself by exclaiming you want to "throw myself into fire" over a teen wearing a my chemical romance hoodie which got absolutely nothing to do with you and affects you in no way whatsoever

No. 332920

thank you, nonnies, for relating to my vent. I am so sorry you both suffered with things I mentioned and I wish I could take those burdens from you.

And yes, it does sting a bit to see society bend over backwards and indulge someone's mental illness, knowing how horribly we were treated as kids. Mental illness was taboo. You didn't talk about it. Autism was flapping hands and people who memorized calendars. There wasn't nuance at all. Maybe we are stronger because of that but we can never erase the scars of growing up in that environment. And my theory is that eccentric behavior was largely tolerated up until the mid 80s. Things somehow changed then, some kind of rebound conservatism or association of strangeness / atypical behavior with drugs.

No. 332926

No. 332928

File: 1685816970322.gif (24.44 KB, 253x65, IMG_5739.gif)

Hey mcrfag, i was the OP who interacted with the teen. She was engaging, fun, and nice. Most teens suck but so do most adults. And honestly, teens are still developing and learning. A lot like us being in our 30s- we also are works in progress.
I think some teens are weird, but they have grown up in a era of social media (beyond basic myspace and blogs), they have grown up connected with smartphones, and also made it through a very isolating pandemic.
I dont mind the younger fans/ enthusiasts. I myself am a former mcrfag now. the whole gway in dresses, being sexual for a crowd of teens weirds me out
Consider it flattery theres kids loving the emo era.

No. 332968

>I've noticed as I reached 30 I've gotten a protective eye over younger girls out in public when creepy moids go near them.
That's just jealousy over not getting any attention, nothing more. Be honest with yourself.

I think humans were never meant to live this long and it's all pretty much done and over after 30. For reference I'm 37, and while my life is perfectly in order there's really nothing out there anymore. You run the gamut on all experiences and human interactions by the time you go over thirty, and everything beyond that is just a boring and predictable slog. Yes you can do dumb shit and travel, party, pick up hobbies and so on but it's all just a smokescreen that hides utter boredom. Everyone knows it and nobody has the guts to admit it, but it's the truth. None of this has anything to do with youth or beauty per se, but the way humanity is. There's a hard limit on how much emotional content there is in life.

No. 332970

I think you're just depressed.

No. 332971

Um… I'm 21 myself and I've been getting sexually harassed by old ugly moids since 14. It's never a good thing or something to be jealous of because you're not preyed upon. Those men always choose the meek young women because they think we won't say anything.

No. 332973

Depression completely evaporated out of me by the time I was 22 or so. No Nonna, I really mean it - there's a hard limit to emotional content one can have in life and it covers everything from depression to blissful happiness. It all becomes a samey experience in the end, you stop feeling strongly because you are intellectually aware of how emotions come and go, and you've experienced them all many, many times.

The point I was making is that that hag, and I'm an even older hag, is "looking out" for younger women out of jealousy and a desire to sabotage potential relationships and happiness (no matter how transitory) that can develop between a man and a woman. She's just clothing this in some bogus sentiment about how she's an oh so noble and motherly mamma bear. It's all just a lie.

Take care of yourself, by yourself. Only you know how to do that and what is right or wrong for you. Every "motherly" hag is a piece of shit and I struggled a lot to come to that conclusion about myself too. Older women will always try to sabotage the younger with their "good intentions." Be careful out there. Men are predictable, other women are more sinister and insidious, and vicious.

No. 332974

I'd rather kill 100 older men than fuck 1 older man, no young woman is going to ever have a relationship with a creep she's being chased by in the streets. I also love "hags", older women are so interesting to talk to because they've gone through so much and know so much more than I do. At the hospital I work at, I always interact with great older women and it's so nice hearing about their experiences and the advices they have for me. They always offer me stuff and try to care for me and my other female coworkers.

No. 332977

NTA but what's there to even "sabotage"..there is no happiness in older man younger women relationships. 99% of the time it doesn't work out and someone gets groomed or abused.

No. 332978

You just sound like a miserable person tbh. Of course you’ll feel that way when this is how you choose to think about life.

No. 332980

God imagine being friends with someone like you. You probably make everyone around you suicidal

No. 332981

This hag talk is quite suspicious.
I really value the friendships I have with some much older women btw, everyone is different and many are kind and supportive to younger women
>think women helping other women who are being creeped on are jealous

No. 332993

So…you are boring?

No. 332995

elderly moids on lolcow? more likely than you'd think

No. 333002

t.old moid hands typed this

No. 333005

>20s are essentially a continuation of teenage years, brain forms around 25, then 30s are the true prime years if you care for yourself in your 20s. Moids/incels love 20-somethings because they are essentially close to being teens, naive, easier to manipulate, and less sure of themselves.
I think 20+ year olds are still adults, but I do judge anyone past their 20s who only date 18-24 year olds, I find younger adults so unattractive and baby-faced. I think I'm more attractive now than I was when I was 22.

>What really irks me is the zoomer generation and their obsession with “old” people - they seriously act like 25+ is geriatric.

I notice the current generation in their early 20s now are more immature than the people who were 20 a decade ago. When I was in my early 20s I didn't have a second thought about being 25-30+ one day, but to zoomers it's the end of the world. I'm looking forward to the rest of my thirties but my least favorite thing about it is you're either put in the boxes of "too old"/"a hag" or a "MILF"/"cougar".

I can't even put into words how retarded this post is.

No. 333007

Why did so many of you respond to moid bait? Have none of you heard of report and ignore?

No. 333011

sorry but its fun to insult them.

No. 333018

they're probably jerking off to your """insults""" and you're just shitting up the thread and encouraging them by giving them attention. integrate or go back.

No. 333051

File: 1685852204066.png (161.38 KB, 522x366, 132.PNG)

I'm 50. Weirdly, it's really great as everyone my age is old and an uggo. And if you do the bare minimum of looking after yourself and getting some exercise in, everything is really peachy. (Also you have more money so that is a plus).

I found this is the age when all the ex-boyfriends of my teens and early twenties start trying to get back into contact. I've put effort in to getting back into contact with my unrequited crush, who has grown up to be a wonderful man (sadly married, as I am, so we have a platonic friendship). Now that the bulk of family stuff is over, you can go back to doing the stuff you REALLY liked, but without the weight of "what are you gonna do with your life" hanging over your head. Sure, there's a bit of retirement planning, but this is the BEST time.

No. 333055

great thread idea. I'm 33. It's awesome. I have a career and money and live the life I want to live. Had to go through a lot of shit to get here.

No. 333059

I turned 30 and literally nothing changed, please stfu and stop reinforcing scrotey talk points that women are over the hill and it’s over for them once they turn 30, you sound like an incel.

No. 333074

Can you older nonnas tell me where you were at 25 vs where you are now? I need a glimmer of hope.

No. 333077

No Zoomers welcome here, go elsewhere

No. 333080

At 25 I was in an abusive relationship with a piece of shit scrote and wasting away in a windowless cubicle. Wanted to kms but was too busy working to really think about how bad things were. Now I’m 30, in a healthy relationship (started at 26 and still going strong), work from home and get to do whatever I want with my time. I still have struggles but I’m happy and even though I’m not rich at all, there isn’t much I want that I don’t or can’t have (main thing is a house but that’s like 90% of people my age so I don’t feel too bad)

No. 333081

nta but she was literally defending you kek, priorities?

No. 333087

It's the same moid pretending to be a "jealous bitter hag" that he accused older women of being. He's mad I said no young woman want an old expired male, kek.

No. 333090

No, it’s not. I just don’t think anyone under 26/27 should be welcome in this thread - go ahead and lurk, but this thread is for women nearing 30 or over 30. We don’t need commentary from 21 year olds on here regardless of what it is. Imo 21 is still a child, they can go elsewhere and leave the discourse to the adults.

No. 333091

This is refreshing and we’re happy to have you here! Thank you

No. 333092

This is toxic, leave this thread. Your thinking is exactly what perpetuates the stereotypes. Get help. Fix your thinking. Seek therapy, but don’t spread your bullshit rhetoric here.

No. 333093

They don’t have to be heavily edited kek, I just said anyone over 30 who is inspiring to you. You sound mad. Not every 30+ woman is thriving because they have money. I said literally anyone who inspires you.

No. 333094

It’s not about the random teen, it’s teens in general. Have you spent any decent amount of time around teens as an adult? They are insufferable to be around, and they think they’re so obscure, so cool, act like they know everything, and in general are narcissistic. I’m not saying all of them. But most of them. Especially in this age of social media. They sort of disgust me now.

No. 333098

This thread should be a celebration of aging as women, something rare yet necessary. Stop bringing your seething about younger generations into it.

No. 333105

25 - living in hometown, awful relationship with ex, no assets, no therapy, depressed
Now - new city, married, homeowner, regular therapy, less depressed

No. 333111

I turn 33 this year. I like being in my 30s. I feel I grew into my features and started caring about exercise and form that I've got a better body than I did in my 20s. I style myself better. I've more sense and I'm more financially secure. I feel like I get listened too and treated with respect the more I age and I can also bullshit people easier because I rarely get challenged. I've got years of experience of being a snarky bitch and putting men in their place when they talk down to me or try to act obnoxious. I'm extremely content with myself.

No. 333118

This website isn't for old expired males. I'd rather kill an old man than kiss him. Go seethe harder.

No. 333137

I’m not sure who you think you’re replying to, but I’m not a male, and I literally said the thread is for women

No. 333144

I'm not old but at 25 I was struggling to be employed, on a cocktail of meds that made me dissociated from reality, and going through an eating disorder. At 31 I've been having a steady (albeit annoying sometimes) job, my lifestyle is more healthy/natural besides the electronics, and while I struggle with a social life in the middle of nowhere I'm not living in my head constantly.

This is also just a general discussion for 30+ women, this isn't all femcel whining over "hitting the wall". Plenty of posts are happy besides the bait.

No. 333148

File: 1685886484519.jpeg (154.08 KB, 1200x1800, IMG_8230.jpeg)

Noémie Merlant. Saw her in Baby Ruby yesterday, she had this youthful energy about her and I was assuming she was mid-20s. She’s actually 34! Pictures don’t do her justice, she’s gorgeous in motion. Also loved her at 30/31 in Portrait of a Lady on Fire.

She also actively speaks out about the objectification of women.

No. 333153

File: 1685887764145.jpeg (7.36 KB, 299x169, IMG_8231.jpeg)

Adèle Haenel, speaking of Lady on Fire. Currently 34, 30 at the time of this pic. Recently quit the film industry openly due to their complacency towards sexual predators. Was manipulated and sexually abused at a young age and was very open about what happened. Lovely woman all around, and so strikingly beautiful

No. 333154

with 25 I was unemployed, couldn't leave the house, depressed, suicidal and just got kicked from university. Now in my 30s I have an education, will soon have a nice job and my mental health is like "healthy". I'm not suicidal anymore, only a little bit depressed, but I'm doing better than ever. Sure, there are one or two things that are still a struggle for me and I regret stuff, but back then I didn't know any better, as I didn't have any help from the outside and fought my battles alone. Best thing about being older, I don't care what most people think about me anymore and it's so nice to just be who you are without trying to impress someone. There is always hope if you let it happen and if you try to change the things that make you feel miserable.

No. 333157

Turning 28 in a month. I honestly don't care about reaching 30. I only regret that mental illness has stolen so many years from me but it's getting better.

I'm getting an education so I hope that by 30-35 I'll have moved out and work a job that I can tolerate. That's all I want from life.

No. 333183

Thank you, nonnas! You give me hope.

No. 333185

Saw the video recently where she left an award show because they gave an award to that fucking paedophile Polanski - I hope she have great success in whichever field she enters next

No. 333189

Is it possible to turn your life around at 30? Has anyone done it? I don't know if I'm being a doomer or if my life is actually fucked forever because I destroyed my 20s. Everyone I know is getting married and starting to have kids and get real careers. I've improved a lot (compared to the mess I used to be) but I feel so behind and the insecurity is driving me insane.

No. 333193

The older I get the easier it gets. Plan ahead a little but not too much, don't be too dumb, focus on understanding what genuinely makes you happy as long as you don't get dumb chasing happiness (I am talking like, dont develop a drug problem, but notice if a nice organized space or a certain genre of book just feels satisfying to you etc for me it is a good structured routine and power tools) l. Mid twenties was very hard. Childhood was harder but my late 20s I am the happiest ive ever been. I suspect happiness can increase indefinitely with age as long as you pay attention to your own inner workings and work toward what drives you. Even hard times feel easier if you have that. Granted I havent lived past 30s so idk what the future holds for me, but looking forward I see only more positivity.

No. 333195

history is full of late bloomers, you may not have come anywhere near your peak yet. you can do anything at nearly any age once you're an adult. tons of people have had a eureka moment in their 40s and 50s and started a successful business/hustle or invented some random knick knack that made them a millionaire.

or just work a normal job and save up. there is gonna be a big market collapse during the 2020s for sure, dont invest shit right now wait for the next great depression and get into the market after a bubble pop and wait for things to rebound. gonna be a huge tech bubble pop soon mark my words.

No. 333214

My best friend was basically unemployed long term NEET, dateless, loser until she was 33. Then she suddenly met a guy, got married, had a kid and went back to college all in the space of 2 years. I have seen people turn their lives around, it’s never too late.

No. 333225

Out of sheer curiousity, is she happy? Was it a "jump on the opportunity because I might never have this chance again" type of situation?

No. 333243

I don't understand anons on other boards who act like there's an age limit for using an imageboard of all things. I also noticed a weird increase in shitting on women in this age range ever since the thread was made.

No. 333244

Yeah do they plan to stop using LC when they turn 30-40? Like you turn a certain age and suddently you're magically super normie? Not going to happen. Many of us grew up on imageboards, after all.

No. 333246

Exactly. During downtime I’d rather be here than on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, etc.

No. 333250

Me, they're awful. I was also a shitty teenager too

No. 333269

first thing is that you have to ask yourself what you want from life. Do you want children, marriage, a career and so on? And if you see what you want, you can clearly turn you life around. I got my education in my 30s after losing my 20s to mental illness, I never wanted children or marriage, so I didn't miss out on that, but I can say that you can turn your life around as I did it myself and I know many other women that changed their life completely after reaching 30.

No. 333270

Ageism is only a reflection of fear. Especially for under 25 whose brains aren’t developed and are warped by social media, they truly feel as if they’ll never age and the reality of it is literally incomprehensible until you reach like 27. So they turn those feelings into fear and antagonizing people who remind them of their fear. I just laugh because the reality is that being 30+ is not even 1/5 as bad as society tries to make it seem

No. 333271

it's so interesting as many of them missed out on the fun times you had back then when social media wasn't even a thing and not every picture went through photoshop or filters. These tiny websites, these small communities for one special interest, horrible self made blogs, the minutes a huge picture needed to be fully visible and the sound of your modem connecting you to the internet. And with the years all of the users of LC will get older if it still exists in the future.

No. 333276

I basically wasted my teens and 20s and managed to turn around to getting my life on track to something more normal right before I turned 30. I think there's hope.

No. 333277

Dang why was everyone in this thread having a horrible time at 25. Happy for you all though since it sounds like you're doing better. It's nice to see older women online because it really does feel like people think we should evaporate at 30 or only have mommy Instagram pages.

No. 333278

samefag but I hate that I naturally typed the world older as if 30s are even old

No. 333309

>why was everyone in this thread having a horrible time at 25
I wasn't, through I had my own ups and downs over the years of course. They are just replying to >>333189 and >>333074 who asked specifically for people who overcame their troubled 20's

No. 333321

I'm in my late 20s and I truly want to be in my 30s so badly because I know I'll be more stable then. I'm aware it's a process and I should make the best of it/enjoy the moment as I go along, but it's truly excruciating and painful some days. I'm loads better now than I was in my early 20s, and I was barely alive in my teens, so it's not like there isn't an upwards trend. I'm just very tired. As irrational as it may seem, I feel like relative peace and stability is waiting for me past 30 and I want it to just arrive already.

No. 333328

I turned 31 this year and I sure hope so. Do you ever talk to your friends about this feeling? I recently had a discussion like this with an older friend who basically has it all. It's really life affirming to hear people you care about or even just admire say out loud that they appreciate all the different types of people in their lives and honor their unique experiences and paths, regardless of deviation from the status quo. It's so easy to get caught up in culturally scheduled milestones, but age really doesn't have to be relevant to the quality of your relationships or other sources of fulfillment.

No. 333372

Does anyone feel like they’ve lost their looks/the currency of attractiveness over 30? It’s one of my fears in regards to leaving my 20s…

No. 333377

No, you only lose attractiveness to predatory moids.

No. 333384

No. You will look exactly the same with minimum self care like eating healthy food, doing some kind of physical activity, sleeping enough, hopefully not being in extremely high stress environment or picking up a substance abuse problem. when I look back through photos I looked my worst at 26-29 because of a high stress job and nightly drinking to "unwind", but 30-33 I looked good again (better than my early 20s actually) because I left that job and started taking care of myself. all that generic health advice is true by the way, hope you're taking care of your health.

No. 333404

I'm about to turn 31 and I'm definitely in the best place of my life so far. I don't work shitty jobs anymore, I'm finishing school, I ditched my sex obsessed moid. I think there's a confidence that comes with more life experience, I'm way more independent and willing to try new things, I'm going traveling at the end of the year and I have more time to take care of my body. Younger ladies in your 20's I hope you all embrace all the great things that come with entering your 30s. I completely did a 180 at around 28, if you're worried about "stalling" in life it's absolutely not too late.

No. 333406

Nah I look and feel better than ever. Like nonnie said here >>333384, invest in health. When I was I was in my early 20s I didn't do much physically. But once you start working out and get toned, or any muscle gains, you'll look and feel so much better. And now I can afford to choose better quality clothing.

I stopped doing 98% of my make up except some little liner and mascara, but no longer use foundation or anything that cakes on. Just obsessively use sunscreen and a skincare routine. Looking back I regret using so much make up because thats just what everyone else did. Personally, most women look perfectly fine naturally imo. Take care of your skin and you'll be fine. And just the ignore the minority of loser redpilled scrotes who say women hit the wall at 25.

No. 333409

I finally filled out at 32. My body looks better than in my 20s with very basic exercise and eating heaps of veggies. I've got a bit of volume loss in the face but it's not noticeable if I'm hydrated and use HA lotion.
You just have to be a little more intentional in your 30s.

Yes! I haven't needed to drag my husband or male friend everywhere to ward off horny pests for a few years. I'm so much more relaxed in public now.

No. 333443

At 25 I was dating and so humiliatingly in love with a manipulative, cheating addict, had no job + I had my degree but was too depressed to do anything with it, was living with my dad in a two-bedroom apartment. I was an alcoholic to the point that I had pretty severe physical symptoms and my 26th birthday I got so embarrassingly shit-canned at National Harbor that I don’t think I can go back to like any establishment there (including the Peeps store.) I’m 30 now and haven’t talked to the abusive ex in any capacity in three years - which is a feat because I literally was so brainwashed I believed my only reason to live was to love him. I started a really good career at 27 and got the 6 figure salary promotion a few weeks after my 29th birthday. I bought a house with my Nigel, who is a good and kind and trustworthy man who has a real job and real priorities. I’m 2 years and 7 months sober.

I still get depressed, and at 30 and sober it’s different and hard now for me to reconcile. I thought if I fixed my life’s circumstances things would get better and they did, significantly, but there’s still that nagging feeling with the added pressure that I have so so so so much to lose now if I were to ever backslide. I also have this complex around my looks because when I was constantly fucking up everything around me, at the very least I was always fuckable. It’s hard that I can see myself aging and to know that I’m losing it little by little - hair’s thinning, varicose veins, little bit of turkey neck, etc. I think I always knew that aging would fuck with me but I had hoped I would’ve made my peace with it by now, but I guess I have a backlog of things to work through that I just drank about for 15 years. I think I’ll get there eventually though. There’s still so much time.

No. 333457

I am turning 32 in a few months from now and I'm trying to turn my life around. I'm so behind everything due to years of depression, falling for troon bullshit and neetdom. I'm trying to get in college to get a career. I'd like to have a relationship but I don't really feel this is so urgent as I used to when I was in my late teens/early 20s. Like, I'm open to it but not looking that deep because I know I have to fix up my problems and have at least a bit of economic stability before I can accomodate a partner or whatever and I am not interested in casual relationships at all. So I don't feel so bad about not having a kid or being married/dating because I know it could only end badly in my current situation. I never really thought badly on being single probably because my family never pressured me into a relationship, quite the opposite, my mom always told me to not have kids so soon and also to not marry a guy like my dad kekk. My dad reinforced these teachings by just being himself. I guess that really saved me from being stuck with some retard and a kid.
I expect to get into college next year and I guess if I'm unable to for whatever reason I can still get a job. I don't know what exactly I could be doing if I don't get into college, never planned that far because I'm always afraid of making too many plans and having none of them coming to fruition. All I know is that I just can't keep living like a man, wasting my life doing absolutely nothing. Besides I have my mom to take care of.

On the bright side, I look much better nowadays than in my teens and early 20s. I mean, yeah, I am kinda ugly but I grew into my features and don't look so awkward anymore. Also I don't care anymore about what people think of my choices of wardrobe, I dress whatever I want and I made peace with the fact there are some things I can't change and there is no reason to change them. If not for other people making me feel this way, I don't think I'd ever feel uncomfortable in my skin, and I know that now, which really killed any desires I had during my early teens/20s to change my body in any way, plastic surgery would never fix the issues I have, it would only make them worse. Oh, and I don't have this fear I had during my teens of getting older anymore, I just don't care.
All I miss about being a teen is not having this fucked back. Also I regret not exercising in my 20s.

No. 333461

No, I feel like I've gotten more attractive. I take better care of myself, dress nicer (when I can afford it), my face is more mature. I honestly think I looked awful in my 20s.

No. 333463

I started with real skincare in my early 30s and let me tell you, my skin never looked better. I never smoked and avoided the sun like hell, so that might have helped, but honestly, my skin is glowing now, minimal wrinkles, no anorexic face lines anymore and I just look healthy and younger than I looked in my mid 20s. And the best part is, you stop caring what people think about you and that will attract the right friends/partners. Don't be afraid, you will love being in your 30s, you just don't have any fucks to give anymore and that will make you way more attractive for the right people.

No. 333464

I think that one reason why many of us had horrible 20s is that there wasn't anyone really talking about mental health and how important it is to get the right help at the right time. At my school I was the first one to self harm (tiny school in the middle of nowhere), no one even considered getting or making me see a shrink. Today everyone seems to have some mental illness and everyone is talking about it. Not that it's in any way better, but I guess that being able to talk about these struggles and knowing that there is help, would have made the life of many of us better. I also think that many people would like for women to disappear after they turn 30, as if we are dead after that age and this thread is very refreshing to see. I've met some amazing women that were in their 40s to 60s, more confident and self-loving than I've seen any other woman before.

No. 333483

Just piling on to squash your illogical fear. I also look the best I ever have at 30. I got braces at 27/off at 29 so that was a big part of it but I also nailed down my skincare and style and everything else that you slowly work on through your 20s. Basically by 30 you should mostly figure out what enhances your appearance and what doesn’t. Take care of your health, stretch, and drink water. Keeping your looks is not hard but it requires consistency.

No. 333485

The absolute best part about being 30+ is giving less fucks. I was so insecure in my 20's. Now I have less fucks to give and it's truly a blessing. Happy ageing, nonas.

No. 333488

This is the best thread I've read in some time. I appreciate nonnas coming together to speak positively on aging with strong personal anecdote… I'm not young by any means myself, but it truly means a lot to read.

No. 333504

Nayrt but would you mind sharing your skincare routine? Ive done a mild routine (as in wash daily, moisturize, usually use sunscreen, occasional basic clay mask) thru my 20s but idk my skin is changing and I am not sure what to do now.

No. 333529

Does the dating pool get better in your 30s nonnas? I've lost all hope for 99% of men in their 20s

No. 333535

This, it's like a switch flipped in mu brain and I suddenly acquired a sense of style. Just turned 30 and it rocks.

No. 333554

>I think that one reason why many of us had horrible 20s is that there wasn't anyone really talking about mental health and how important it is to get the right help at the right time.
It wasn't like that for me. I was diagnosed with mental issues as a kid, so "getting help", "finding the right medication/therapist" and "being diagnosed with [disorder]" was basically my personality in my teens and 20s. Mental health treatment for so long ironically made me worse, I only got better past age 25 when I matured mentally and started examining the root of my problems.

No. 333557

I’m 35 and stopped drinking six months ago because I could feel it taking its toll on me as I was sometimes prone to binge drinking on weekends. Now I’m doing a lifting program at the gym and upped my skincare routine and I’m feeling much better about myself physically. I have a ton of insecurity in general though because my hobbies are mostly fandom related and my best friend is a decade younger than me. I still function as an adult and everything but sometimes I’m ashamed of these facts and I’m not sure if I should be. I also try to be normie enough to not come off as weird. I think the hardest thing about being a 30+ women is not internalizing the bullshit messages about already being “over the hill”. Like good god I’ve barely started, I’m not on my fucking deathbed.

No. 333621


Sadly not, moids are shit as soon as they hit puberty and it never ends.
Women in 30s tend to say "All good men are taken by now" but from what I have seen a lot of women who started their relationship early in their 20s and settle with their moids have come to peace with eating shit.

Also women who get to 30s and go into panic mode so they settle for a moid also give up and eat a lot of shit.

The only way is to learn to be content with being alone and only accept a moid in your life if he brings value. Age does not matter.

No. 333631

Unfortunately this was me. I dated the same guy for around eleven years and he was promising in the beginning but things very slowly declined and now I’m leaving. He just stopped seeming to care about ever wanting more out of life, and I’m not cool with that. We were engaged at one point but I couldn’t go through with it because I thought even being on my own would be better than being someone who just stopped caring, and honestly I think it is better. I see some of my married friends in similar situations who are absolutely miserable and just went through with it because they felt like they had to. I didn’t want to end up like that, and I think way too many people settle just because they’ve been with the same person for so long. Anyway, if you’re a younger nona don’t make my mistake. Get out early while you can at any sign of something not going the way you want.

No. 333636

Thank you for all of your responses. I’m really happy I started this thread, it’s exactly what I was hoping for. I feel so much better about approaching 30 now thanks to you ladies and your wisdom. You’re all lovely and inspiring.

No. 333643

File: 1686059203997.jpeg (129.09 KB, 680x1019, IMG_8236.jpeg)

Gal Gidot is 38 and grew into her features so beautifully. Imo she looks even better than she did in her 20s, and it seems her career straight skyrocketed when she entered her 30s. Incel moids drool over her as Wonder Woman and I don’t think it even clicks for them that she’s well into her 30s lol

No. 333644

File: 1686059492859.jpeg (68.58 KB, 634x896, IMG_8239.jpeg)

Elizabeth Olsen is 34, and I recently saw a movie from years ago when she was in her 20s. She looked exactly the same. She was also stunning in Love & Death

No. 333646

File: 1686059663390.jpeg (464.02 KB, 2048x2048, IMG_8240.jpeg)

Margot Robbie - has looked exactly the same for the last decade. Playing Barbie at 32. She always looks so full of life and like she’s just enjoying every year to the fullest, and always excelling. Love her.

No. 333651

My 20s were much easier, life has really thrown a wrench at me this last decade (just turned 40). Life events specific to me though so it'd be different for everyone. Hope it's better for you

No. 333659

Reading this thread as a 22 year old is like going on 4chan, it's a boost to my ego seeing how fucked some of you truly are.
Also it's fucking hilarious how some of you are more worried about looking older than not having your own house or a nice paying job at your 30s.(bait)

No. 333660

Like scrotechan? Nice bait sis.

No. 333666

Men are really stupid. They don’t realize how many celebrities they lust over aren’t just turned 18 virgins or even women in their twenties. They love to go on and on about how you instantly become a hag at 30 (or even 25 in some cases) when for most people there is not a major change in how they look, and for some people things get even better because you learn more about how to take care of yourself, what styles you like and look good in, etc. I think they just hate that by that age, most women have wizened up to male stupidity, so they’re desperate to bring us down a notch.

No. 333668

If you think it's a bait, why are you replying? Also sis? Kek. Did you come from some underground tea forum?
Also this thread is filled with delusional old women who are failures in life just like how 4chan is filled with old men who are failures in life. Both groups are too old to be wasting their time shit-posting instead of trying to improve their lifes and both groups have mental disorders or underlying traumas that make it hard for them to fit in.
Instead of being worried about serious things, both groups care more about how they're perceived as unattractive and romantically undesirable
>>333666 post is an example as she types paragraphs being angry some incel told her that she's no longer hot. Normal women don't care about pedo incels, only losers like you guys do.(infighting)

No. 333672

No one said you can’t be worried about multiple things. And many women on this entire board do have good jobs and houses, you might realize that if you weren’t a newfag and paid attention to more conversations in other threads. I think the looks/relationship thing is getting brought up so much because those are the things society criticizes women for the most, even over career or finances, which are things men experience more criticism for. It’s really not rocket science, and it’s not necessarily being discussed because every person here has a failed relationship or can’t get one or whatever. Most of us realize how much worth society places on those things and have also been able to recognize issues with having low expectations in relationships as well. You’re a child right now, so maybe someday you’ll get it if you aren’t one of those idiots who think turning thirty is the worst thing that could happen to a woman and don’t kill yourself first. Somehow I think you are, calling anyone over thirty “old” and expecting that everyone will have the same life experience. Things happen. I also thought my life was going to be perfect at 22 and that I was better than everyone else. Hope the fall isn’t too hard for you.

No. 333679

Can we not do this? The whole "Look! Here is a woman who's over 30 and still pretty! Look, here's a woman who's 32 and went back to school, that's INSANE!"

No. 333682

Weird take. Most of the posts in this thread are positive and about how our lives turned around in our 30s, but when I read other threads here it's usually the 18-26 crowd who are posting about being NEETs and having no social skills.

No. 333684

I agree. 30's is still young, it's like those anons are talking about women twice as old. And I don't think we should post like that about 60+ yo women either, being beautiful shouldn't be the main thing to admire about other women.

No. 333686

Agreed re:beauty, I get the original nonna's intention, but the focus on having maintained youth is not a good priority. Taking care of yourself and maintaining your grooming/health is good, but those posts are skewed more towards maintaining desirability and proving to moids that women are still valuable for sex last 30.
I don't think there's anything wrong with celebrating a woman returning to school past 30, though. School is an actual important axis of self-development in most countries, and a gateway to being able to financially support yourself as an independent woman. Too many nonnas believe that just because they were put behind their peers by circumstances like mental illness or abusive relationships, they've missed their chance. It's good to show them that it's never too late.

No. 333687

Just ignore her. Like she said, she's young and likely lucky enough to not realize how easily everything can go down the drain, especially for women. Maybe she'll get to age without ever having to worry about this stuff, and if that's the case– good for her, this thread isn't for her. If not, it'll be here for her if she ever needs to hear from other women that things will be alright.

No. 333693

This is why Zoomers aren’t welcome here. It’s obvious your brain isn’t formed yet kek, get off the thread and come back when you’re a real adult

No. 333694

Really, can the mods ban this child? Calling women in their late 20s to early 30s old women? Sweetheart, you’re next. Do you realize you’re not much younger? And if you feel the need to post the uneducated garbage you’re spewing, you’re the insecure one. Get help, and stay away from this thread idiot (coming from someone only 3 years older than you, btw)

No. 333696

It’s an ego boost seeing this post because it reaffirms my belief about early 20s women thinking they’ll never age, the same way a 5 year old can’t fathom being 10 one day. The fall from grace is going to be so hard for you, and tell me, what do you have to show for your life right now? Since you’re so high and mighty. I challenge you to come back to this thread in 5 years, and tell us about your grand successes lol. The fact that you’re spending time putting down women who are, quite honestly, not that much older than you - really shows how little you have going on in your actual life. Do better. And stick to threads where you circlejerk with other 22 year olds that think they’re ageless

No. 333699

Cope harder, I'm in college and I'll be quite accomplished once I'm your age, which is all I'm working towards. I also don't care about men finding me hot or old unlike the insecure idiots here because I don't spend my time in online spaces obsessed with looks as much as you. I also don't buy into the ideology that women look worse at 30 so I won't be as pathetic as you once I'm your age. I'll see my smile wrinkles and be happy I got to smile so much, see the grays in my hair and be glad I survived those stressful moments that caused those.
I think women in their thirties are generally great, the ones I talk to irl at least they're quite shitty online just like any age group, I think the ones here are losers though. Seriously, stop caring so much about looking young or old, it really doesn't matter as much as you think. Who cares if some loser virgin guy thinks you have wrinkles? Who cares if an incel claims you're too old to be pretty? Who cares if some porn addicted moid makes fun of you for being single?
You guys literally care so much about how others think. You're spamming random 30 year old actresses and saying they're pretty. Like, what were you expecting? Do you think women all look disgusting after 30? This whole thread smells like insecure women brainwashed by incel ideologies, next thing these retards are gonna do is settle for any man or woman that shows them attention because they think they're too old for an actual person to love them genuinely. Not healthy.
I'm not saying getting older is bad, I'm saying that the mindset anons itt have isn't healthy. They're obviously very insecure and have a weird fixation on looks and youth. A woman doesn't even age that much until her late forties but since these women probably hang out in online chambers that shit on any woman's looks, they think they're grannies who have completely given up on their looks or something.

No. 333700

>it reaffirms my belief about early 20s women thinking they’ll never age
you only believe this if you spend little to no time with your grandparents. i used to live with mine, and i was never scared of aging and recognized myself as a future oldie.
multiple generations must share a house. the way we live right now, in flats and apartments, separate and "independent", is bad for humans as a species.

No. 333705

You’re agreeing with the premise of the thread but you’re being a huge bitch about it. Damn sorry some of us have insecurities how silly of us to talk about them. Fuckin A, let us work through our issues in peace.
Although I agree on the actress-posting but that’s because I cannot relate to celebrities.
No young’ns allowed. Shoo.

No. 333706

>I recognized myself as a future oldie
This feels like stolen valor coming from a 22 year old lol

No. 333710

i'm not her lol. i actually belong in this thread.

No. 333713

I agree with the premise but I disagree with the arguments anons are making. Not aging isn't a good thing and pretending to be younger than you are is futile. I'm not pretending I'm 18, I'm not trying to look younger because I know it'll only be damaging to me in the long term.
And although I agree with you and that insecurities are things you should work thorough, I think a lot of anons itt have very toxic mindsets that influence others negatively as well. I personally don't look at rich gorgeous 22 year old celebs and compare myself to them, I doubt anyone feels good about themselves when compared to a curated image of a very rich person who has means to purchase all type of beauty. A lot of anons seem to be spending way too much time in incel spaces and that's why they have very warped views. The only man that's told me women expire or that look ugly when they grow old was an abusive 50 year old unmarried man who cried to me once because he knew he'd never have a wife and a family. That's the type of man these anons are taking seriously, a genetic dead end.

No. 333721

Do you have fucking eyes or did you not see everybody disagreeing with the anon who posted all of those actresses because she missed the point of this thread? Way to go selectively filtering what you read itt so that you can burn a strawman and fuel your ego boost.
For the record, if your online behavior really was as you say it is, you wouldn't be on this thread in the first place. Go be the paragon of normiehood you see yourself as. Hopefully it'll give you some life experience and make you less of a massive asshole.

No. 333733

Since turning 30 I've been really self conscious about how my autism/strangeness manifests in choices about my appearance. I feel like I'm dressing too "young" because I like to wear unusual outfits. It's normal clothes, just like, styled unusually, not super revealing or full trad goth tier. I actually just like wearing really feminine girly clothes in light colors, but everyone around here just wears t shirts and jeans or business casual simple stuff and I am so sick of the stares when I go out. I am clean and well kept, I think I look fun and cute. But I am so insecure that people maybe have an attitude like they do toward lolitas…which is "how dare you try to look young, you're an old hag lol". I am absolutely not "trying to look young", I just like youthful styles. Ugh. Idk how to get over it and just dress how I want. Last night this insecurity peaked and I dyed over my beautiful fun colored hair with ugly brown. I've been crying and miserable since because I regret it and it's going to be so difficult to get it so light again. I know I should just get over it and not care what other people think. I want to just embrace being my full self like many people describe happens in their 30s, but it's feeling more difficult for me now that I've hit that milestone for some reason. I hope once I get my cute color back I can treat this is a lesson that trying to be "normal" isn't worth it.

No. 333777

I'm not an expert, this is just what I'm doing and I hope you research everything I write. My skin is rather dry and I mostly don't have outbreaks and stuff like that, I'm just very sensitive towards the sun.

What I do is:
- sunscreen, spf50+ every day
- I don't use foundation, only powder, eyeshadow and mascara, but I will wash it right of my face when I know I won't leave the house again
- I switch between retinol, niacinamide, vitamin c and basic moisturising creams with urea and stuff like that. Everything with no perfume, no alcohol, light textures. Not everything at once, more like one product a day and I will go at least one day without everything
- AHA or BHA peeling every two weeks or once a month, not too intense, my skin wouldn't like that
- I quit drinking alcohol, don't smoke and try to sleep at least 6 hours and drink my water, kek

That's all I can tell you. It really changed my skin and I look healthier than before. Next thing I will try is a collagen supplement and then I will see what I can do to improve my hair. I think it's important to not overdo it and slowly find what your skin needs and don't forget that it's important what you eat, if you eat like Shayna, your skin will never look healthy.

No. 333780

i've got an issue because of my autism too, i didn't even consider my clothes which are probably wrong too, but i'm concerned with how childlike and deferential i act, I'm still anxious around people and women my age end up assuming i'm younger because of the way i act, it's embarrassing when they find out i'm their age but i have no idea how to act my age, i speak like a kid and act shy, cute when you're actually a kid, embarrassing as a 30 year old… my body language is all wrong too

No. 333789

I'm 30 and my initial response to the thread was roughly the same, minus the stupid generational wars.

No. 333797

To be fair, the first handful of posts at the beginning seemed to be all normal women just saying they're happy, comfortable, and living their best normie lives while enjoying their 30s over their 20s.
You are on a imageboard after all, so the fact there's mixed bag of people ranging from the bottom struggle to the top finally living their best lives shouldn't be that surprising.

No. 333798

Stupid generational war bs from the outset- regurgitated idpol psyop bullshit and everyone who participated in it should be ashamed of themselves. You should be building bridges with other alienated women and supporting them, even if they made the grave mistake of being a few years younger than you. If you're 30 and you "hate teenagers" you are a fucking embarrassment, a product of the society that made you.

This thread is some of the saddest shit I've seen in a while and rivals being on scrotechans a dozen years ago.

No. 333804

That's like 3 people and the majority of the thread is older nonnas encouraging younger ones not to be worried about aging/talking about being happy and secure in their 30s when they didn't think they would.
Genuinely what the fuck is with the random anons coming in seething that this thread is about shit it isn't?

No. 333823

Seriously, did zoomers actually read the posts in this thread or just fixate on a few negative ones? I was happy to see most posts were positive or just talking about experiences instead of "hitting the wall" complaining.

No. 333833

I was in college at your age, too. I hope you succeed but damn, putting down others is an immature trait. Like seriously immature. This thread is literally for women to encourage each other and be supportive by sharing honest thoughts and experiences. If someone finds solace in looking at celebrities who have excelled with age, that’s just fine. If you didn’t notice, it wasn’t just looks that anon was pointing out. She was also focused on their personalities and their successes past 30, when society tells us women hit some sort of wall or become stagnant at 30. The point was missed by most of you. It’s not about their looks alone.

Your derailing the thread by insulting women here is exactly what is not okay. Just because you have such a positive view on aging, doesn’t give you permission to shit on other women who are posting on this thread hoping to find support and guidance. You really need to leave this thread. You are obviously not reading all of the posts or willing to be supportive of these women. This thread isn’t about you. It’s for women nearing 30, or above 30. So you really need to leave and stop insulting women who are here seeking support from peers. Your opinion is irrelevant here. Go somewhere else and stop fucking up the thread by being an argumentative 22 year old. For real. Leave the thread and let the women here post in peace. You’re acting like a child.

No. 333844

>damn yall anons are mentally ill and pathetic, well just so you know as a woman in her socially determined prime age I'm never going to be insecure over aging, I'm going to embrace my sexy smile lines and never feel shunned by society or pressured into just disappearing and making babies!
It's going to happen to you too, anon. The society around us hates women aged 30+ and the next time you'll be worth a shit is when you're a cute sweet grandma baking cookies and knitting sweaters, granted you actually did have children who had children on their own. Pretending like it's just a "you problem" of anons being vain is denying how much antipathy adult women face and how their only desired personality trait is to be a mommy and a wife, simultaneously being hated on for being le crusty middle aged uggo Karens jelly of sweet young women. This is a structural problem and can never be fixed if you keep blaming women for being so "insecure" as if their mindset was born in a vacuum. You'll understand when you get there.

No. 333848

nta but normies dont have neurodevelopmental disorders smartass

No. 333849

nta but stop dragging others down with you.

No. 333851

since you're desperately looking for a boost of ego, i assume your life is not going so well either.

No. 333853

File: 1686123877808.jpg (27.62 KB, 369x338, Holly_Jacobs_clothed.jpg)

>trailer swifts bangs < holly jacobs bangs

No. 333859

What "dragging others down with you"? Are you saying that recognizing how misogyny affects women is just being a dumb debbie downer who needs to lighten up? How do you ever figure we can fix issues with societal misogyny if you keep pretending it only exists between your ears and choose to bury your head in the sand instead? When I actually passed 30 It hit me full force how much people want women over that age to stop existing as individuals. There's a reason why so many normie women hurry in a panic to raise a family and have kids and it's not biological - it's seen as the natural transition from moving on from a sexualized maiden to a mother figure sacrificing herself for the good of others and they've learned this since childhood. Even this thread taking those accounts as just "old pathetic women being mentally ill and dragging young women down with them" should be actual living proof of my point.

No. 333870

I assume it's because the human brain stops developing at 25. Actual human puberty mentally and physically stops at 25 for women and 30 for men iirc. But I might be misinformed on this.

No. 333874

I think this is just a sad incel and/or blackpill troll that’s baiting across all threads these days. It’s exhausting but kinda easy to spot once you’ve encountered them.
>Goal is to make you feel bad and start an infight
>Lack of reading comprehension, nitpicks certain arguments or one specific post while ignoring everything else
>At the same time will use other anons arguments verbatim when it’s befitting
>Volunteers little information about themselves so they can make something up later to one-up you “ackshyually I’m in college”

No. 333879

It’s so funny that this thread upset a few nonas/possible scrotes enough to write unhinged rants about why this thread is sooo bad and it’s hardly even offensive. Calling the thread toxic while coming in here attacking women for simply having a discussion. You guys who are absolutely miserable and unlikeable btw. I appreciate this thread bc I always assume I’m older than everyone and it’s good to know there are actually other women my age on here. If the topic of looks comes up, so fucking what, don’t read or reply to that specific post. Use your brains and stop blaming women for existing in a world where we’re conditioned to care about that shit since birth. Reminder that nobody here is better than other women for being so unbothered by how you look because you’re just the perfect feminist. Literally shut the fuck up and maybe even kys

No. 333884


Yea like this failure redpilled scrote or redpilled woman who needs help >>332968 100% reads like a manosphere loser. Outdated narrow-minded thinking that women hit the wall at 30, no concept of female comradery of women helping or watching out for other women, and anything outside of the white picket housewife life is misery. Lolcow has a bunch of moids lurking but once it in a while they completely fail to hide it kek

There's plenty of examples of women here who posted about live fulfilling, happy, comfortable lives in their 30s and who are willing encourage or give advice.
20s is barely starting life, 30s is still young and when most people actually can or do start their life. For many, 20s is just studying, shit job, dating mistakes, and time to learn about yourself. So don't let some bitter nonnie or dateless wonder scrotes who hate happy women discourage you.

No. 333890

Hi I made this thread and wanted it to be a supportive place for late twenties and above women to be able to share their experiences and feelings/thoughts honestly without judgement and incel scrote rhetoric. Can we get back on track and make this an uplifting & positive conversation, please? It started off so well and degraded so quickly. Let’s all support each other and stop fighting. Additionally, if you’re under 25 and have nothing positive to say here, don’t say anything at all. Thank you!

No. 333892

I myself am 27 and really am just tired of the constant hate for 30+ women and wanted to hear from women around my age and who have passed the 30 mark, this was meant to be a positive thread and not infighting so please, can we all get back on track?

No. 333895

>anything outside of housewifing is misery
I literally only made fun of you losers because none of you have any good respectable jobs or any other life skills. Most admit youre mentally ill or stunted, can't make friends or any connections and probably don't like the currently position you're in yourselves either.
Also being a housewife is dangerous as you'd be dependent on a random man who could walk out any time he wished.
Youre pathetic because you've wasted your life away and only think about how "you've hit a wall" instead of realizing how many opportunities you've missed. If being less pretty is all you care about even though you have no friends, no life skills, no education, several unmedicated mental illnesses,
nothing to be proud of, then I don't even know what to tell you.

You're parroting incel mantra because hanging around in toxic incel spaces is what you spend your time doing. Seriously stop, you're too old to be wasting any more time like this. It's sad.

Only people who have nothing to offer care this much about looks. As I said, I interact with a lot of older women irl and I've never looked at them and thought they were worthless because they didn't look like airbrushed celebs. You're obsessed with looks because you spend your time online in echo chambers and know that you have nothing to offer so you blame all yout issues on your lack of beauty. Go outside, look at women my age. Are they all gorgeous? No. But they're not obsessing over their lack of beauty and letting that stop them from living their lifes.
Stop pretending that it's normal to care this much about looking "sexy" when you all have much bigger issues.(back to infight, again)

No. 333897

It's bait, don't reply just report and keep grooving

No. 333898

File: 1686147981620.gif (120.94 KB, 400x398, happybday.gif)

What do you think of the concept of "milestone birthdays"? Will you/did you do something special for your 30th/40th/etc? Would you appreciate if people made a bigger deal out of it than any other birthday? I feel like every birthday is kind of the same but I also think it can be fun to do something bigger if you have an excuse. I have not ever had a big bday bash but my best friend is turning 40 this year and I want to do something extra for her, I just don't know what.

No. 333903

Thats so nice of you to want to plan something for your friend. I have nothing to contribute really, I never really celebrate my bday with parties or anything more than buying something / taking a bit of time off. Dont like the attention. But whatever you decide to do for your friend I am sure she will appreciate. Maybe some kind of pun on 40, like 4D where theres those holographic oldschool posters everywhere and everyone gets those red and blue paper glasses? Lol.

No. 333906

I didn’t really do anything special for thirty, it really didn’t feel any different from my twenties and I don’t love big birthday stuff. I’ve kind of taken them slowly and quietly since then and just did hobbies I really like instead of any organized thing (apart from a nice dinner sometimes).

No. 333947

The frontal lobe fully develops at 25, which is pretty significant, but not everything. It doesn't mean any maturity or growth can't happen on a personal level. I was in a terrible place at age 21-29 with 25/26 as the worst due to circumstances, it was being more mentally developed that help me manage and get out of it.

No. 334081

I didn’t put a lot of effort into my career in my early 20s. I got hired by the company I wanted very quickly, and sort of stayed stagnant there for three years. Once I passed 26, it seemed like things clicked and my goals for myself evolved. Now instead of staying stagnant at my “dream job”, I’m moving up which has been nice. I supervise now, but I’m also studying again for a higher degree and more money. Now I’m much prouder of myself and my accomplishments, and glad I didn’t stick with the “dream job” of my early 20s. This year I’ll be working for a medical examiner’s office and within the next two years I’ll be a certified medicolegal death investigator. It feels so badass and I can honestly say I’m proud of how I’ve evolved career-wise. When I was in my early 20s I had it “all figured out” but as I enter my late 20s I have much bigger goals and higher standards for myself

No. 334129

not to derail but I'm just curious what field of study did you start with (like what associates or bachelor degree) before moving towards Death Investigator? I've never even heard of that job title it sounds really interesting, I thought there were just coroners and cops.

No. 334162

Congrats nonna, that’s awesome!

No. 334165

Which games do you like?

No. 334182

I turned 29 this week. I don't have any goal i particular right now, I'm single, I live with my parents because rent prices are outrageous and my salary isn't all that high. I'm just maintaining my routine of waking up, going to work, going on a stroll or shopping after work and going back home to eat dinner, shower and play video games or post here before going to bed. It's boring but comfy, and staying with my family means I can save a lot of money so the only things I'm truly planning right now are a few trips here and there abroad or in my own country. Honestly I could have went way further in life if it weren't for a shit ton of external circumstances ruining everything for me as soon as I was born so I have no ambition whatsoever, and that means no more stress.

No. 334183

I just turned 30. And after a life of misery, depression and failure I start to feel like my life is going somewhere. My apartment starts to be comfy and cute, a lot of my anxiety is gone, I’m able to do normal stuff like going to work which was impossible for me for a long time. I look forward to the future.

No. 334185

To be fair that's how many people I know from middle and high school are treating social media now. They all used facebook and twitter when it was the new hot thing a lot a little bit before 2010 and now almost all of them have deleted their posts or even their accounts, barely post anymore and just send private messages to their relatives or irl friends instead. I can see why some people would think that this would be the same thing for imageboards but they're too different from social media to be comparable in that regard.

No. 334220

I am 30 and I am happier than I ever was in my life. I spent my entire teenage years depressed and with severe eating disorder, spent my 20s trying to learn how to even be a functional human being, struggled hard to find people I could relate to and dated a bunch of losers until I met my now-husband at 26. I always desperately wanted to be a normie cause I was a NEET loser and I can now say I made it. I am married to my soulmate, have a beautiful babygirl, moved away from my shithole country and we are buying a house this year. I have everything I always wanted so I can deal with a couple of wrinkles and grey hairs. I still sometimes get insecure about my age and looks just because society really beats it into you as a woman, but I have great support and am very happy.

No. 334222

The wall is not just a metaphot…(scrote who can't spell)

No. 334256

A year from 30. Less actually. Feel fine. More accomplished, real career and relationships. Most people assume I'm 22-23 so that's cool but also it really is just genetics. I drink a lot but I did quit smoking 3 years ago.

My main thing about being closer to 30 is that people younger than 25, unless a family friend, relative, friends siblings, etc.. I can't stand. Yeah some people can be mature for their age. I was told that a lot in my teens (I was also living on my own at 17 so I had no choice.) I can't get on well with the younger crowd, there's such a big disconnect. Also they're so fucking overly opinionated like they know everything and everything is so stupid and woke as well. I worked with some younger kids at my last retail job 2 years ago and I remember mentioning as a joke "I feel like a dude" and all of them got so excited asking me if I was fucking trans. Can't say shit around them.

No. 334297

The early 20s of this generation are more immature and brainrotted than the early 20s of last generation. When I was a teenager, the people I knew in their 20s were so mature and cool to me, but zoomers act more like the peers I had when I was a teenager.

No. 334302

I'm turning 26 in a few months and I struggle most right now with a lack of ambition. I work full-time in unskilled work and live with my parents. I've settled into a routine and feel pretty stuck. I have a desire to do MORE with my life, I just don't know what, and it's hard to make any change when I have no true ambition. I also feel this annoying regret that I didn't become social until my mid 20s. I was sheltered and abused as a teen and developed a social phobia because of it. I'm finally overcoming that but I keep thinking about how much further I'd have gotten in life if I'd felt confident and driven by the time I graduated high school. That being said I've definitely noticed a growth in my mental stability and overall maturity in the past year or so and I'm not afraid to get older so much as I just compare my situation with other people too much. I'm not afraid to be 30+, I'm just afraid to be 30+ and still doing the exact same thing I'm doing now.

No. 334313

There are many jobs in the ME field surprisingly, I was going to aim for autopsy assistant until I looked into medicolegal death investigator and the listings in my area. I started off with funeral services and a funeral service education degree. After 5 years of working with the medical examiner on occasion, doing calls with them, and hands on experience with dead bodies through funeral services - I was able to be considered at the MEO in my area. In most cases they want you to have a bachelor’s in science, I believe, but having lots of relevant experience is also an option. They also want you to have some classes or experience with medical terminology and anatomy which I luckily have. Where I’m working they require you to be certified after 1.5-2 years from hire date, and once you’re hired on at the MEO those doors start to open and the progress is fast.

If you’re interested in working in the field, I’d recommend starting off with a bachelor’s in science or the two year funeral service education degree, and maybe do some removals for a while (just removing and transporting the decedents to various locations), imo hands on experience with dead bodies of all types (decomps, suicides, crime scenes, normal deaths at home/nursing homes/hospitals) is the way to go for gaining the experience they look for. I wish I had applied sooner tbh I wouldn’t have been stuck running in circles at a funeral home for minimal pay lol. Funeral services does not pay well so my early 20s dream job didn’t really get me far

No. 334597

Asking this makes me feel very stupid, but how do you find friends in your 30s? I've moved some times and so everyone I know is far away and the contact is mostly not there anymore because of that. So, if you move to a new city in your 30s, how can you find friends and please don't tell me work, as the people there are mostly not what I would like to have as a friend.

No. 334629

I will be monitoring replies to this lol
I lived in five different cities in the last ten years. I have friends from the second city and somehow no friends from any other cities (one “toxic” ex friend I honestly shouldn’t have been friends with but that doesn’t count, we basically bonded over being workaholics at the same job) other than that just some work acquaintances I don’t keep up with. I don’t know how some people do it… feels like I should actually have a large social circle from living so many places but the reality is the opposite. I’m not even socially anxious. Kinda wish I hadn’t moved so much in my 20s

No. 334634

Making friends in your 30s is difficult ngl. I've mainly made friends through volunteering. Try to find different volunteer opportunities and you'll come across some people with similar interests and values.

You can also try different groups like book clubs and activity groups (e.g. running club etc).

No. 334649

Join clubs and classes of things you are interested in (art, books, dance, rock climbing etc) keep an eye open for any events around your city that you may be into and you think people you may vibe with will go to (concerts, expositions, farmers markets, film showings, etc)

Always be willing to approach first, there is nothing embarrassing about wanting to make friends, people love friendly people who make things feel less lonely and so they will likely be open to you unless you are terribly socially inept. If so, being the person who approaches first may seen scary, but the trick is just throwing a comment someone's way and wait if they reply in kind, don't force it or act too eager. The more you do it, the easier it gets.

No. 334738

Work. I’ve met most of my friends through work.

No. 334743

She said work wouldn’t work for her due to the type of people she works with. I’m curious what that means exactly though. Maybe she will tell us. Work is where I got all my friends but that’s also partially why I keep losing them when I move so it’s not the perfect environment

No. 334745

My guess is marketing people

No. 334762

I hear so often that I look 20-25, I think it’s when you don’t dress like a granny and don’t have super deep wrinkles from a overly expressive face that people assume you cannot be 30. Because 30 is old and ugly? Not assuming what you look like btw I’m sure you look great

No. 334788

Thank you both, I will give those things a try.

I'm working in the fashion industry and I had to work with troons, gender special women, annoyingly woke women, extremely gay men and overall people you wouldn't want in your life. In the end, I would be open to befriend someone at work but never met someone I would say that he/she is worth it.

No. 334864

Eh this happens to me as well, and you’re right. My little brother has deep lines, and a different bio dad so aged much differently. People assume I’m his little sister and starting college soon for gods sake. He never gets carded. Nobody I meet assumes my true age - I’m 27 and have yet to not be carded, teens assume I’m their age and try to converse with me, I recently tried to enter an 18+ lounge and was asked if I’m 18 and to show ID. It’s annoying at work because my partner is an older man, and it’s a family owned business so clients ask if I’m his daughter and along for the ride to learn… nobody takes me seriously, scrotes still approach me and catcall like I’m still 20. It’s almost a curse if you really look at it from my adult perspective. I’ve been waiting for age to hit me in some way, but I’ve consistently looked 20 since well, age 20 lol. Haven’t even put on extra weight since 20 or grown tits. Starting to think I never will. The worst part is the surprised looks and confusion when I present my ID when asked. At one bar, they assumed it was a fake and my friend who was with me had to stand up for me. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be. I can’t wait to get a few fine lines, maybe gain five pounds and be taken seriously by adults and people around my age.

On the plus side, the physical aspect of aging doesn’t scare me much at all. Just the implications that come with being older, the expectations, and the looming reality of my older family members getting sick or dying

No. 335235

I used to have friends through my old job but at the same time I felt like I couldn’t/shouldn’t actually get too close to them or like if we met outside of work I wouldn’t have been drawn to them. Idk, is it bad to be cautious with coworkers and friendships? I’m always afraid something will happen so I’d mainly just go out to eat with them and keep conversations relatively shallow.

No. 335244

Not that anon but I'm a network engineer and refuse to move past shallow conversations with my (mostly male) coworkers. Work isn't an option for actual friendship lol

No. 335252

It's nice to see other nonas talking about this. I'm in the same boat and I find it hard to talk about because it comes off as bragging. I'm 31 and I still look very young and people assume I'm young. I kinda dread the moment when my age comes up because people act so weird when they find out about it. I feel like I'm not a serious person and like no one views me as a serious adult. I already feel behind in life in many ways and it makes me feel like even more of an outsider.

No. 335253

Sage because I just want to half blog/comment. I am nearing 30, and I think that I am noticing the 'younger' gen grow up some. It is so neat. I like video essays and random philosophical things on youtube. I dont always agree but I enjoy hearing someone really pick apart an idea about society and culture. I am seeing more and more 'young' creators on youtube pick apart their own experiences in the zoomer culture- like fresh outta highschool or 1 to 2 years into college. Picking apart 'aethetic' or 'doomerism' or what have you in a longform and intelligent way. Its so so cool to see critical thinking about the shit they got handed, so many people shit on zoomers due to needing that dopamine hit constantly and being lazy in their work. Imo they are going to have a harder time building a satisfying existance than my generation, and my generation is fucked. Stuff like that makes me realize I am 'older' (not Old though). Something that happened at a job I did once- kid maybe 20 or so working on a retail rebuild thing and he straight up had no idea how to read a tape measure. Blew my mind. Not even the ability to deduce it from context of lil consistent numbers. So I showed him… and he used it flawlessly kek. He was just trying to match distances from a different object basically. At first I felt he was stupid. Then I realized there had be zero context in his whole life and education…where he needed to use one, more likely. He wasnt stupid. Idk I guess I feel almost motherly now when I hear late teens and early 20s doing their thing. And I see such lack of organic opportunity for real character and critical thinking development for the zoomers it makes me sad. Even discovering oneself via coming of age etc and 'rebelling against the status quo' has been turned into a product to sell and capitalize on. A lot of them know it, too. I cant believe how young I am to feel like I have seen a lifetime shift in the world, I guess. Its a bit overwhelming to imagine what the next decade will look like.

No. 335260

I'm 37 and had to show my ID twice to buy alcohol this month and we are allowed to drink reaching 18, kek. Most people assume my age between 25 and 30. Sometimes I think about lying about me real age in my CV, because somehow people just can't tell that I'm old enough to have adult children, kek.

Getting told that you are mature for your age if you are young is somehow damaging, I feel. I got told that a lot when I was around 15 to 18. Real reason was, I was depressed, not mature, just done with everything and because I was quiet, didn't get into trouble and read depressing stuff, people assumed I'm mature and there might not be the chance that I would need help. I also never heard someone say to a boy that he is mature for his age, it's just expected of girls to be all grown up.

No. 335264

I used to think this was a compliment and meant I look young too but I recently learned that most stores have rules that they have to ask every customer who appears to be under the age of 40 for ID. Some places even have a sign next to the check-out that says this.

No. 335285

Might be a thing here, too, even thought most places won't even check the IDs from minors buying alcohol.

No. 337201

This, exactly. It’s really awkward when someone asks what year I was born or how old I am. People perceive me as being early 20s and treat me as such. My coworker in his 30s was talking about cartoons his younger sister would watch growing up. I talked about some of the cartoons I watched as a kid, he then asked what year I was born and I told him. It was awkward after that, he just kinda said “oh… so you’re, wow. Ok.” And then it turned into horrible silence. Like, he was that taken aback that I’m almost 30? I get he was thinking I’m early 20s, but is it really that shocking to men when they find out you can look very young but still be a mature, literal adult? It seemed to bother him. Fucking awkward and almost makes me want to lie about my age so shit like that doesn’t happen anymore

No. 337204

Do you not go out a lot or do you wear sunscreen when outside?

No. 337208

Both, I don't like the feeling of sun on my skin, so I wear sunscreen and long clothes when outside. If I can avoid it, I won't be outside in the summer except from the early morning or late evening hours. I also don't smoke what helps your skin very much and I have pale skin with a rather large round face, so if I lose fat in my face it's not that visible.

No. 337226

I know that's the rule but it's so funny to me because the age I look apparently changes depending on what else I am buying. Beer, chips, and salsa means I'm under 40 but beer, milk, and eggs means I'm over 40.

No. 337255

the so called wall is a lie, stay fit and childfree and it won't come for you

I'm 34 and my bf is 22. Together almost a year. This makes old scrotes seethe and I love it so much.

No. 337265

I unironically think being volcel and not having to deal woth moid bullshit saved me from so much stress and premature aging.

No. 337309

This is unironically why I gatekeep being friends with people below 28. I'm 32 myself and this same ish happened to me around that age. I don't buy the rhetoric that we're fully mature by 24 or whatever. People in their 20s are massive insecure losers with no swag and no taste.

No. 337362

Wasn't sure whether to post in the fashion thread but how are other 30+ nonas dressing these days? And where do you like to shop? Some good online stores?
I am a firm believer that you can still dress how you like, and I like some of the "elder emo" fashion that I see sometimes. Corporate goth is nice, stuff like that. I am just feeling like I want to be less showy at this age if that makes sense but at the same time I still want to wear something nice but probably comfortable? I used to wear short skirts and shorts, busty tops etc but don't feel like it anymore. I still have some for occasions but yeah. Hope that makes sense.
Also the fact that everything is made as cheaply as possible nowadays and I want things that last.

No. 337368

>it won't come for you
>implying that the wall is real if you do certain things
Lame. "The wall" isn't real either way.

No. 337374

i'm starting feel like the wall is losing its meaning kek and today more than ever scrotes are throwing it around to insult women or basically very young women now.
The manosphere uses it for women at 25 now because they believe 25 is when women "peak" in appearance and fertility, but others will say its women are no longer attractive which doesn't make sense since many women in their 30s still look young in their 20s now because of better life choices…. and scrotes can't tell the difference.
A few weeks ago, some cryptorich redpiller made a post about how he'd never date women past 30 with a photo of girls around him as if he pulled them. But then one of the girls came out said she's a sex worker hired by him, and she and the other girls in the photo are 30+ kek. Even scrotes can't tell the age of most women kek

No. 337417

Nta but I’m a very young looking near 30, like mistaken for 19-22. I’ve spent the last 7 years working nights only and see the sun rarely, and if I do have to go out in the sun I’m wearing tons of sunscreen. My family seethes about how I haven’t aged yet and claim this is the reason. But I also maintain a low weight (120, 5’6) do strength training, eat healthy, intermittent fast, don’t drink alcohol and had an insane amount of extra fat on my face when I was younger so fat loss in the face was beneficial for me.

No. 337435

the general amount of skin I show got less, like skirts are longer or no hot pants, but in the end I dress very similar to the past 20 years. Mostly all black, basic stuff and band shirts, kek. I want to change it a little bit to a more elegant goth look on some days and a "goth ninja" (hate that term) look on other days. Stuff being comfortable is also very important, I changed my complete underwear to basic looking comfortable stuff, kek. Like you I can't find shops that have the right price for the right quality so haven't been shopping for a long time now. I know I could buy designer clothes that fit my aesthetic, but I don't have the money and don't think that the quality justifies the price, so I will have to sew everything myself in the near future, at least that way it will fit 100% and I know that no child labour was involved. Hope some other nonnas have some online stores or brands for us.

No. 339789

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Hate to bump but has anyone here used the “aged” filter that’s trending on tiktok? I’m 27, have been in this thread a bit and panicked about aging (have always felt afraid to get old)

So is this actually an accurate filter?! It feels so unfair if so. I see a lot of girls looking mostly like themselves, just older, which good for them but… when I do it on myself, I look NOTHING like myself. I literally look like Pearl in X. It’s insane and it’s actually causing me fucking mental harm. I don’t want to humblebrag but I look young at 27, I’m pretty, no wrinkles, etc. And always thought I’d age gracefully until this filter came out. Someone please give me input on this filter, because I look like a plumper picrel when I use it, it’s embarrassing and terrifying

No. 339791

Don't use filters. Problem solved. I'm serious.

No. 339792

>a data collection app is trending on a chinese brain rot simulator
I'm shocked.

No. 339793

So women who look old aren't graceful? "Aging gracefully" is just a (misogynistic) dogwhistle for looking younger with the help of surgery. You may relax by knowing that people won't find you hot anymore after a certain point, and it's okay. You shouldn't base your worth and mental health on how hot you are.

No. 339795

> I don’t want to humblebrag but I look young at 27, I’m pretty, no wrinkles,
You shouldn't look old or have wrinkles at 27 smartass, time to limit your social media usage.

No. 339797

touch grass

No. 339798

Do you never leave the house? Most normies are haggard and starting to wrinkle and bald by 27. I even see 17 year olds with crows feet.

No. 339800

I have a perfectly fine social life and see people of all ages daily, do you? Late 20s moids often look like dogshit but late 20s women? Or even early 30s women? Not whatsoever. The only late 20s woman I know who looks genuinely old has been going to the tanning salon on a weekly basis ever since she was legally allowed to do so on top of abusing alcohol every weekend. Women don't look old or have wrinkles at 27 if they have an average healthy lifestyle. Maybe you just live in a trash area where people don't know how to take reasonable care of themselves.

No. 339801

Sounds like there's something in the water or air or food where you live that's making people sick.

No. 339802

Do you live in a place with tons of sun and methheads maybe?

No. 339803

I posted this - I’m not saying women in their 20s-30s look old. What I’m saying is this dumbass filter keeps being backed by surgeons and doctors as being “accurate”, allegedly it ages you 30 years. And mine is so terrifying that it doesn’t even look like myself in any way shape or form. I look like a hag that would poison children when I do the filter on myself - which is why I’m asking if anyone has done it themselves, and if it’s actually accurate. No hate for older women, I wouldn’t mind being old as it’s a gift even if it feels scary, but my point is this filter implies I’ll look like an evil 90 year old hag in just 30 years, which is messing with my head. I’d like to be the sweet older lady that would bake cookies for kids and give them wise advice. It’s not about being fuckable or hot. I’d just like to look like myself in some way and according to this thing I’m going age like milk in the most horrific way possible. That’s what bothers me about the damn thing. It can’t possibly accurately predict how people will look in 30 years, right?

No. 339805

I go outside plenty and I’m not seeing this at all. I see beautiful people from teens-50 year old women looking great. I’m with the other anons - are you surrounded by crackheads or something?

No. 339809

I see this in more sunny places and places where wearing a lot of makeup is the norm. Most women look younger than they are, especially in their 30's. Men look the same everywhere, they hit the wall like a motherfucker because they just don't care about themselves.

No. 339810

Babies have crows feet. I’ve never understood that one, it seems like a bad marker of age. Same with other smile lines.

No. 339822

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Lots of literal children where I live have smile lines, crows feet, and even "marionette lines" (not really but lines going down to your chin). It's just our facial fat distribution. We don't age badly either. There is no concept of 'the wall' here. Men will just fuck anybody.
Is this a Western/Northern Europe thing? North America thing? Internet thing?
I'm Greek, we certainly don't look haggard by 27 even though it's sunny. Some people never wear sunscreen either, and lots of us chain smoke. Some men will start balding and look like the Penguin after 25 but most people lead decently healthy lives and move a lot. You have to try really hard to look old in your late 20s and early 30s. The internet has scared a lot of women into buying products by telling them they will be unlovable and ugly.

No. 339823

I'll be 32 next month and I feel like I'm actually happier. My life isn't perfect, but things are going a lot more smoothly than my teen years or all of my 20s. Linking vid because she's someone I watch and she recently did a video about turning 30 and I can relate to a lot of what she says, but especially the part about not caring about certain things anymore. There are things I would've really been bothered by during my 20s that don't seem to faze me now and I'm not entirely sure why, but all I can attribute it to is age. I had a hair appointment last week and my stylist, who is 27, didn't believe that I'm about to be 32. I even saw the stylist and client in the chair beside us quickly glance over out of my periphery when I said my age and people in my classes (a mixed bag of some older than me, but mostly zoomers) also didn't believe that I was 30 a few semesters back.

I will say that the only difficulty has been finding women around my age to be friends with, because it seems like they've either settled down to have kids already and are always busy or they're handmaidens to the gender retards. I don't harbor any hatred towards women with kids and I'm still on the fence about whether I want them someday, but it would feel awkward trying to hang out with someone who is clearly on a different path than me. I'm sure that if I decide to start a family, I'll be able to befriend other mothers because it seems like there's so much more readily available for families than the childless. For now, my boyfriend and I are focused on being fiscally responsible and plan to eventually look for a house.

No. 340435

When I hit about 33 (35 now) I started having some strange experiences and thoughts about life. It might sound retarded, or just like mental illness lol but I started questioning the purpose of life in general, my own life, worthlessness of life, what I'm doing, what I haven't done, how I'd lived in my 20's, felt weird about my hobbies being only for the teen-mid 20's age range, compared what I considered important then to now, felt strangely empty, like things were not real, had a ton of anxiety, struggled with my body changing (period changes, skin changes, first gray hair at 28, fine lines/wrinkles, and even my fingerprints starting to just fucking disappear), a sudden awareness that I have detached completely from the younger generation or rather stopped keeping up with music and media so I really exude that "How do you do fellow kids?" energy if I have to socialize with them at work for instance but also feel totally unwelcome by the older crowd, also been pondering the fact that I don't have a partner and never explored my sexuality. My upbringing was a little fucked up so I don't form relationships normally and certainly can't maintain them, and that's any relationship. I'm terrified of men and will go to great lengths to avoid them even though I'm straight and want to just TOUCH and cuddle with someone and that biological clock is REAL and ticking for me. But, I feel like at 35.5 I'm far too old to have a child. I have a steady and decent paying job, own two vehicles, have a therapist that helps some, but my living situation is not good. I live with my aging parents and am seeing them decline slowly so I wonder if it's fair to leave them and yet, they infantilized me my entire life and still control me. As of now, I kind of just get through each day and try not to cry. Some days are a little better than others but I know I'm only going one way, and that's downhill. Can't discuss any of this with my mother, she's an old hippy stoner and super paranoid and hysterical about everything.

No. 341083

32 now. Turning 30 completely nuked my sex drive. I used to have a fairy high libido and would masturbate 3-4x a week on top of almost daily sex, sometimes long sessions with multiple Os. Now I never feel like doing it and masturbate maybe once every two months. I also noticed I had lost nearly all attraction to my longtime boyfriend after I turned 30. I started avoiding sex and even dreaded kissing him, he was upset and not understanding of it at all, eventually we broke up because of it. I have not felt attracted to one single man I’ve met irl or even online. I don’t know what happened but it’s like my clit dried up and now I can’t get horny for anyone. No idea if this is normal or not but I know it wasn’t anything to do with birth control because my bf had a vasectomy and I didn’t use it. In a way it’s liberating because I don’t think about sex anymore but it does feel strange losing almost all arousal. Anyway yeah don’t mean to scare anyone but that’s my experience.

No. 341100

I guess it depends on the person. I just get hornier with age, although you do lose the ability to get dripping wet.

No. 341160

I'm 30 and most of the people I know today think I'm younger because I was so behind my peers in life achievement stuff and probably just generally give off an immature vibe. Around 29 I did start to shift a bit, although I'm not really afraid of aging appearancewise, but instead dread the thought I have to somehow still spend 40-50(-60) years alive and should stay in generally good health. I feel like my mental abilities are lower than they were but that's mostly due to years of neetdom and depression, possibly untreated other mental stuff. I'm pretty annoyed that I do not have almost any plans for life still, I can't figure things out.

No. 341180

Any anons switched up their careers entirely at 30? I've been working in big corporate tech for my entire 20s and I loathe it. I've been fantasising about changing paths but 1) I'm nervous to actually enact change and 2) I've become accustomed to the level of wealth I have now (which isn't a lot actually, but slashing that sounds terrifying especially with the cost of living on the rise). I feel so trapped and I really want to do SOMETHING else for a living for the next decade…

No. 341202

It's been the other way around for me. I thought I was asexual in my teens and 20s but at 30+ I feel like I finally developed a libido and feel and interest in those things with others. It's a relief because I went through something traumatic as a teenager that basically "turned" me asexual for over a decade, and it doesn't have a hold on me anymore. The draw is now I want to date and explore my sexuality, but no one my age likes anything casual, they've already been around that block just want to settle down, and I'm not into age gaps.

No. 341213

This thread makes me want to kill myself. With your insecurity you are just validating moids.
Based on this thread most of you genuinely believe you you loose value the moment you turn 30.

No. 341215

Most of the posts in this thread are positive and about how our lives turned around after 25, learn to fucking read instead of skimming a few whiny posts.

No. 341218

Just have sex with younger men?

No. 341227

I didn't have a career to begin with, dropped out of university without a degree and let my 20s be ruined by alcohol and depression. In my early 30s I finally got a degree, got another degree based on it and right now I'm looking into getting further education in my field. Honestly, if I had the money, I would go back to university, study biology and not care about a plan or career, but I don't have the money, so that might be a dream forever. If you feel trapped, that might be a good sign that you should change your path and start something new, maybe work till the end of the year, put some money aside for emergencies and think about what would make you happy. In my opinion it's never too late to change and you have enough years of work ahead of you, so why hate what you do when you could change it?

No. 341231

The post just said:
>I'm not into age gaps.

No. 341331

I’m closing in on 30 soon and this thread was really helping me before. Can we bring this back, and can any over 30 nonnies provide me with any sources of comfort? I was on 4chan yesterday and it made the situation worse. So many men there saying women only have value before hitting 25. I know I shouldn’t listen to incels but it really hurt. I’ll never know what people in my day to day life are thinking I’m beyond hope, useless eggs, “hitting the wall” etc. I’m having a bit of an existential crisis, feeling like my life is over and essentially my existence is going to be minimized and my age will be all society cares about. I feel that if my current relationship doesn’t work, once I hit 30 I won’t have any options. I’m feeling self critical because I’m not where I thought I would be in life at this point in time. And I’m scared because it felt like my 20s just flew by, and I missed out on so many things I wanted to do/become. I know this is negative thinking - can any wiser nonnies give me some guidance? When I was in my early 20s I told myself that if I was still feeling like an ugly failure around 30 I’d just give up on life. I’m so anxious when I think about time and I’m not ready to be 30+. I don’t want to wear conservative clothes, give up on myself, change my goals to be more “mature”, I just want another chance at my 20s and I can’t have those years back. I do not have any girl friends in my age range and I just have no support for this transition as my mental health decimated my 20s and made it hard to find friends. Someone, please give me words of guidance. I’m lost here.

No. 341336

semi unrelated chiming in to say taylor is so fucking hot and truly iconic regardless of whatever faults she does have. i'm so glad she's becoming even more insanely popular and honestly she has never looked hotter

No. 341340

> I’m not ready to be 30+. I don’t want to wear conservative clothes, give up on myself, change my goals to be more “mature”, I just want another chance at my 20s and I can’t have those years back.
I'm not really sure what it is you want to do that is only possible in your 20's. Your 30's aren't years where you start to dress like a an old librarian lady then lie down and rot while the world moves past you. Some things like children do have biological end dates and need to be taken into consideration when making plans for your 30s, and you're out of the run to become like a female athletics champion now, but other than that, I really don't know what's so limiting.
It might not be the most positive or upbeat thinking, but also - you won't be getting younger. If you didn't start some habit or project you wanted years ago, now's the earliest time you can mend that. Even if you don't change your work, start a degree, start socializing now (I have no idea what your goals are), time will still move forward and you'll just be a 35 year old with a shitty job, no degree and no friends.

No. 341349

why do you have to change magically over night because you turned 30? Nonna, you can still be immature, you can still wear whatever you want, you can still have the same goals or none at all, you could find a new partner, you can have children at the end of your 30s, you can marry in your 50s, there is no wall and men telling you there is one already hit that wall in their teens. I missed out on many things in my 20s, too, mental health issues are shit and ruin much, but I won't let my 30s and however much I have left be ruined by stupid social norms that aren't true or real. Just sit down, think what you imagine your life should be at the end of your 30s and then work towards that. If you want children, see if your partner fits and if you both are ready in the next years. You want to change your job or your appearance, do it. You want to make new friends or travel the world, well, you can still walk, so go for it. There is nothing holding you back except for maybe money and your own mind.
I've met many women in their 30s to 60s and all of them were strong, independent women, with goals, hobbies, love and they dressed like they wanted. Sure, there are women out there that are miserable, but some are miserable because of their own making and you don't have to take them as an example how growing old will be.

No. 341350

in the same boat, but at least you're in a relationship. people will want to befriend you because of this social status. you still have opportunities and support to pursue a career or marry and have children. you still have hope nona.

No. 341352

This is inspirational, I'm in a similar boat. Flunked out of college the first time I tried and then destroyed my 20s. But I'm currently doing some quick/cheap upgrading so that I can at least get out of retail. Maybe save some money so I can upgrade again in a few years to a real adult career. Thank you for giving me a little hope for the future kek.

No. 341356

File: 1690048323895.png (371.62 KB, 546x348, 2.png)

I'm 37, I have a mostly useless college/university degree but a useful high school diploma, I worked in IT for a while and now I've had this job for more than a year which involves cleaning floors and bathrooms in supermarkets and offices
Pretty good though

No. 341361

how do you go from IT to cleaning floors?

No. 341367

it's based if you think about it, especially if you can listen to music on the job. no people around, no mouthbreathing men who assume you're incapable of doing work because your labia are flapping away doing the job or some stupid anatomically retarded shit, unlike IT. reminds me of the janitor that was a multi millionaire and donated his wealth when he died to charity and absolutely everyone thought he was poor

No. 341368

Weird, where I live floor cleaning seems like a miserable job. The cleaners drive around at nighttime and some of their stops are hours away, with shitty managers that argue, and some of them bring their kids along because they can’t afford overnight sitters or whatever

No. 341369

nice b8

No. 341370

Doesn't it earn pennies though? Idk I
ve only ever seen obvious migrant women have cleaning jobs.

No. 341372

I've only done housekeeping at a hotel but in some ways it was great. the hours of working alone on something with a set beginning and end time and a visible final product… weirdly rewarding. wish it payed more, a bad boss or guest could really ruin your day too but for the most part it was very chill.

No. 341379

>but no one my age likes anything casual, they've already been around that block just want to settle down
This is just blatantly not true. People like casual sex at any age. Yes more people this age are looking for something more serious but they're not going to turn down casual sex in the meantime kek.

No. 341450

>So many men there saying women only have value before hitting 25.
Same men are complaining that women are incapable of being mothers, that they are wasting their eggs, that they are poor losers. They can't make up their damned mind, either they want a young carefree woman to have sex with or a mature woman who is financially stable and ready to be a wife and mom. Same men are wasting their youths and rant on 4chan instead of having a meaningful relationship and children.
>And I’m scared because it felt like my 20s just flew by, and I missed out on so many things I wanted to do/become
I feel the same, but ask yourself if the things you wanted to do are actually impossible now. Don't focus on what you missed out on - you weren't well enough to pursue them, don't blame yourself for it, focus on improving your life and yourself so that you can pursue those things now. Don't torment yourself for not achieving milestones.

No. 341457

This stress comes from being far behind others. If you haven't changed much in your 20s through studying, working, dating, friends then you feel extremely lost because you can't relate to anyone, you feel stunted and this leads to loneliness. In reality, life is very chaotic, a lot of people don't have a perfect life at 30 - people change careers, break-up serious relationships, are lonely because they haven't met anyone/gave up on relationships, return to school, develop crippling mental and health issues, they regret what they did in their 20s, have a broken heart, debts, feel like life if pointless and boring etc. Lack of experience can be good.

No. 341475

>a lot of people don't have a perfect life at 30 - people change careers, break-up serious relationships, are lonely because they haven't met anyone/gave up on relationships, return to school, develop crippling mental and health issues, they regret what they did in their 20s, have a broken heart, debts, feel like life if pointless and boring etc. Lack of experience can be good.
Nta. I know no one's life is perfect but I just don't see the "plenty of people deal with serious shit at 30" irl, at least not with friends and family that I'm close enough with to know for fairly certain they're probably not dealing with shit behind closed doors. Like I'm the only one in my social circle who was in and out of the education system throughout her 20s and didn't start a real adult career until her late 20s, I went back to uni at 25 and I was definitely the only one in that age range, everyone else was 21 tops, I'm the only one who isn't in a long-term relationship (not that I particularly care about this one but still), I'm the only one who's still renting without real perspective on buying property because everyone else had a "real" adult job and a partner to fund a house with just before the housing market skyrocketed, I'm the only one "floating" who hasn't settled.

Not trying to throw a pity party for myself here btw, I'm honestly not unhappy and I'm working hard on meeting my personal goals so it's fine but I'm definitely the only one in my immediate social circles who has clearly failed to meet default expectations/milestones at (nearly) 30 and it's a bit alienating seeing everything go so smoothly and down the expected road for everyone else my age who I associate with. I love my friends and family and I wish the best for them but sometimes I wish I could join a "I fucked my teens and 20s up and I'm still dealing with the consequences, let's be friends"-club lmao.

No. 341476

I only started wearing clothes like crop tops and shorts/skirts above the knee after age 30. Nothing really changed, it just took me that long to mentally grow into my adult body. There's no law about having to wear conservative clothes just because terminally online virgins think you're too old to fuck.

No. 341539

>at least not with friends and family that I'm close enough with to know for fairly certain they're probably not dealing with shit behind closed door
It's just the people you are surrounded with, I meant that it in general, like if you approach a random person at that age they might not have everything, they aren't fully satisfied. I am in a similar situation as you so I wish you the best nonna, we can do it

No. 346914

How's everyone's financial health these days? Late 20s and onward nonnies.

No. 347040

My financial health is significantly better than when I was 20, but poor at the same time

I’m panicking because I’m another year closer to 30 this month. I feel like for my 30th I want to throw myself off a cliff, I’m so nervous. I didn’t enjoy my 20s the way most people do. Any nice nonnies that can talk me down/pass on words of wisdom?

No. 347041

No debt or crazy bills, more savings than my 20s but that’s just because I’ve been putting about the same amount away for over a decade, a tiny IRA/401k type thing I can’t touch for decades, no significant assets. Still have my health. I don’t know what you’d call my situation, fortunate but still poor? I have low ambitions and don’t desire a lot so I feel pretty free to do anything except buy a house in the places I think are nice (the cities I like are overpriced and I haven’t found a more remote area where things might be affordable)

No. 347050

My 30's has been some of the best times of my life so far. I'm so much more confident and I've been able to deal with my social anxiety better because I know it's just an anxiety and not reality.
You have to do what you want to do and own it. It's depressing but I like to think that we're all going to die some day and when we're dead literally none of this matters so why not do it?
Yes I love wearing crop tops and trying to look cute and I want to dress this way as long as I continue to like how I look in it. Being healthy pretty much automatically results in having a good body so that's extra incentive to take care of yourself and start eating healthy and exercising no matter what age you are.

No. 347059

Is it really depressing?

No. 347066

Turned 30 a few months ago and I'm starting all over again, so to speak. I hated my 20s. Can't even remember most of it due to severe depression. College was the worst time of my life. It was one of those things where I got a degree for the sake of getting one and once I got it, didn't apply it well enough and ended up in a dead end career for six years only for them to lay me off during the Spring of this year. By then I sabotaged myself job wise. Nothing left for me but low paying, demeaning, and abusive work. I had to reevaluate myself. Either I spend the rest of my 30s being constantly unemployed and underpaid or reinvent myself. So…I decided to go back to college lol. Considering past experience, it seems pointless, yet I'm not joking when I say I've dug myself into a hole, but this time I'm on scholarship and doing something I actually want and will land me with a job once I graduate. I will say I feel wiser, focused and more in control of my future than before. Though being the oldest in most of my courses makes me feel strange, even worse when the professor asked everyone their age and the whole room just kind of…stared lol. The dramatic "omg you don't even look its" was a lot for me. I've learned to keep my age to myself since then lol.

No. 347098

One of my worries about entering my 30s soon is that common belief that women not in their 20s start having sagging breasts… personal but has this been the case for anyone here? I don’t want to deal with that, it’s just hard for me to stomach

No. 347101

When you start to sag is based heavily on genetics and lifestyle choices. A smoker who kept putting on and off the same 10-15 kilos over the years probably will have sagginess even if they're weren't predisposed to it genetically, but then you also have people who've had saggy breasts since they were 19 just because that's what their body is like. Whatever you do, if you stay all natural your breasts will start sagging as you approach your 40-50s at the latest anyway, so you might as well just come to peace with aging.

No. 347103

Also forgot to add: one of the biggest causes besides weight gain/loss for sagginess is pregnancy and lactating, since the breasts also go through pretty significant and "quick" size-changes, and a lot of women go through pregnancy in their life. So focusing on age as a factor alone would be pretty pointless, because comparing a woman's snapshot from 22 to 32 would probably always be less stark of a difference than comparing another one from 22 to 28 if she had a child between those ages.

No. 347171

I hear you and we have very similar situations. Uncontrollable abuse from other people will fuck up your life and it's not your fault. Unfortunately I'm still living with my parent and abuser who loves the control so he won't leave us alone and I cannot start my life due to this. I'm also afraid I'll still be trapped by him living like I have since I was a kid.

No. 347186

I’m 29, I’ve always been considered pretty by others (not a humble brag, I think I’m ugly). I look younger than my age, I’ve got a brother 4 years younger than me and people assume I’m his little sister, etc. And my family rags on me for “not aging”. However I’m afraid of hitting 30 and hitting that fake “wall” incels talk about.

Is there anything nonnies recommend I can do this year to maintain my looks/body and essentially gave a late glow up before reaching 30? It’s shallow, but I’m dedicating this year to improving my looks so that I feel confident and empowered when I see myself in the mirror at 30+. What are the best things I can do for myself? Exercise is an obvious, healthy eating, but beyond that?

No. 347191

If you're genetically predisposed to have sagging breasts you'll literally see it as soon as you develop breasts. Age related sagging won't even happen until you're a literal grandma
not to get TMI but I use to work at a nursing home and have seen a fair share of grandmas that put me to shame

No. 347200

Good sleep and minimizing stress are a panacea. If you can nail the big 4 (other two being diet and exercise) then you are doing better than at least 95% of people. Combine that with the fact that most people only really hit their stride with career, life goals, and just general effectiveness in their pursuits once they are in their thirties and you are basically looking at having one of the best decades of your life.

I won't shill any particular books, but good advice tends to crop up again and again from multiple different sources. Basically just making sure than you give your work time and relaxation time hard edges that don't bleed into each other, and not confusing algorithmically-honed, dopamine-spiking distractions for relaxation will do a ton for reducing stress. Sleep stuff is again pretty basic and there's tons of info freely available.

No. 347209

>ITT: your 30's as a woman are awful if you are a moid, or in your 20's. For anybody actually in their 30's it's pretty great.

No. 347227

Why would you want to throw yourself off a cliff? My words of wisdom are maybe don't throw yourself off a cliff.

No. 347267

It’s just an expression. When I was 20/21 I was actually pretty serious about killing myself before hitting 30 (I was one of those “30 is old person age” 20 year olds). Really though, that energy is still inside me somewhere, I’m approaching a date I’ve been dreading since 20 and I don’t know how to cope beyond denial, self deprecation and an unhealthy obsession with anti-aging/appearances. It hits me pretty hard knowing some men view 30+ as used up and worthless, despite being engaged, I just never wanted to deal with being viewed as less than I am due to a silly number

No. 347285

I was similar about feeling like life was coming to an end when I was younger, though being serious about it sounds pretty extreme!

When it comes to growing out of that feeling, it probably helped that I had tried dating some of the men that care about age (stupid I know) in my 20s in an effort to lock down a man before I expire, learned that they all make for very bad partners and they were banking on me being too young to know better, and woke up to the fact that all along it was nothing more than a high pressure sales tactic. It turns out the "used up" talking point literally just means "she knows better than to date me now so I'm going to reject her first before she can reject me." It's all in bad faith and these men are chronic liars who want to cope with their loneliness by trying to make women feel bad about themselves. Anyway I replaced my fear with contempt. I don't care if I'm viewed as lesser than by shitty scrotes. Hopefully you can take something valuable from that.

No. 347291

Some men view women over 25 as used up and worthless too. Some men want to fuck kids. Why care about what they think? Men are retarded and most can't even tell how old someone is, how would they know who's "used up"? People who love you know you for who you are and numbers don't matter to them.

I had a bit of anxiety over turning 30 too (though not nearly to the extent of wanting to kms over it, that's worrying) but once you turn 30 you're just 30. Nobody shoots you like a lame horse, you don't look any different from how you did the previous day, nothing happens.
Most people don't care. I'm still in university and people just think I'm the same age as them. I'm not trying to say I'm a super uwu young looking legal loli, but that you really won't look any different and people can't tell.

No. 348574

This documentary is haunting me, nonnies…
So far my adult life hasn't been fun at all and I haven't achieved any of the things I wanted but the thought of still being in the same miserable place 10 or more years later is killing me. Rn I still have my parents but one day… The thought of having kids terrifies me but I still feel like I need to quit my childish dreaming and find a man asap to be surrounded by more people.
Another thing that really troubles me is having intense yellow fever after a decade of weebness. I'm no 'stacy' either but I really never see a guy in my country who isn't super ugly to me, even if they're still younger than me. And of course each passing year it get's worse and once you cross 30 many will be divorced with kids… I'm so jealous of those young love couples who met when he was young and cute and over the years just stopped caring or are blinded by love.
https://youtu.be/r4g5tqcoH_4?si=5klDrQoFmR4FcB35 (sorry somehow couldn't embed the link?)

No. 348581

As someone who worked as a chat mod for dating apps (really just using fake profiles to keep horny, clingy, creepy moids spending money on these apps, bc their horniness/clinginess/creepyness scare away actual women, a very small percentage seemed decent dudes), I found it surprising how little most moids actually care about looks or youthfulness. I'd have some really haggard-looking women in my userpics and there was always a bunch of men interested, especially young guys. I think the moids who are more vocal about women hitting the wall are mostly the ones who won't even make an effort to get some, or senile moids who want desperately to believe their old, degenerate sperm is worth something. So I've come to terms with my body aging and became comfortable with only going for young (adult ofc) dick. It's been actually been nice, bc unlike women who try to improve as they go through heartbreak, moids only get worse. You might have to guide the more inexperienced here and there, but they're far more open to feedback and willing to please.

To me the worst part of being in my late 30s is my juvenile sense of humor (always been like this even when alone), it just doesn't fit anywhere else and I'm very self conscious about it bc if anything, it's getting worse as I age. I feel like a woman my age shouldn't be laughing at the shit I find funny.

No. 348694

I'm 35 about to be 36 and the only thing I'm a little depressed about is how fast time seems to go. Days are like hours, weeks like days, I blink and another year goes by. Married but no kids so it's not kids that's making life fly by. Any tips on how to get time to move slower nonnies??

No. 348696

Mindfulness, unironically.
Also is anyone else getting tired of this site since there are so many young retarded newfags? The average post quality was better just a few years ago.

No. 348697

just delete the ?si and everything that comes after that and it should work fine

No. 348699

I'm 32 and I feel fine. I guess it helps that people think I'm younger than I look. Also, I realize that I still have a whole life ahead of me. I'm definitely taking better care of myself than I was in my 20s though. Focusing more on my health and doing all the fun stuff I missed out on early on in my life. I think the only downside is that some people think I should have everything put together and figured out completely by now, but that's just unrealistic to me. I'm taking it one day at a time and doing fine.

No. 348700

Divorced with kids at 30? Where do you live, arkansas? Men look fine at 30+ if they took care of themselves and didn't eat a gamer diet and fry their skin in the sun. your whole post is crazy.

your 30s are just your 20s but with money. I look and feel exactly the same at 32 as I did at 18.
men are so retarded they can't even tell if someone is wearing makeup or not. Imagine taking anything a moid says seriously. They're dumb cattle designed to be labor-meat golems; unfortunately their mouths make too many noises. Scrotes really be beer-gutted and malding and talk about ranking 18 year old women for hotness. Men are worthless garbage thinking their burger king crown is real diamonds and gold.

No. 348745

I'm 32 and don't feel that different. I spent all of my 20s in college and grad school so having a career in my field doesn't seem that novel, I guess. It's OK, I like having money and a home. I know I need to have a baby soon if I'm gonna do it…

No. 348747

File: 1694769768894.jpeg (104.58 KB, 828x442, IMG_2478.jpeg)

why do these men want to punish or shame women for growing older? why do they care so much about a women turning 30 and her “eggs”? this guy probably doesn’t even have kids himself lmao, it’s such weird behavior.

I’m turning 30 in 3 months and, yeah it’s a little scary to reach a new point in my life, but I didn’t give a shit befor. Now I see these types of posts all the time and, I still don’t care but it makes me doubt the men around me, are they thinking such weird thoughts ? Do they all view women like this ? it makes me just not want to bother at all with them

No. 348748

>men are so retarded they can't even tell if someone is wearing makeup or not
Not only that, they can't tell a woman's age either

No. 348749

Someone should send him a carton of spoiled milk

No. 348773

To any nonnas approaching 30 that want kids and feel “rushed”, I would say don’t buy into what you are sold by moids and media. Several women in my family had their first kids at 36-38 and the kids have no autism or anything, no health issues, and one of these women was a serious anachan for most of her teens and all the way into her 30s. Your body is resilient and it doesn’t just start rapidly dying at 30 as long as you look after yourself and your reproductive health. I had my first kids at 32 and honestly felt glad I waited. I was not stable enough in my 20s.

No. 348783

Most women have kids after their 30, it's nothing to worry about.

No. 348803

>why do these men want to punish or shame women for growing older? why do they care so much about a women turning 30 and her “eggs”?
probably because no woman wants them, thus malding on twitter about muh women age (just like any other living creature) and no eggs and whatever other bullshit they say

No. 348807

Fucking hell, you're considering chaining yourself to someone and having kids 'to be around more people' but somehow moving or getting a hobby where you talk to people is impossible? I hope you're young and this stems from a Tiktok overdose because this is a fucking grim mindset. Maybe try therapy before you shoot yourself in the foot.

Men are obsessed with passing on their retard genes and don't understand why women are genuinely happy being single and child free. They can't fathom a world where women wouldn't care, would think this was a low effort prank a 12 year old was filming for their Youtube channel, or wouldn't have any idea what the egg carton meant. The thought of a woman over 30 getting pregnant or putting off having kids until she's older is as alien to them as the idea of self improvement.

No. 348869

Because they think they can father children up until their death despite sperm going to shit much sooner than female eggs do and kids fathered at an older age have a drastically increased chance of being born with a mental disability. So they gloat at childless women in their 30's and think they "finally gained the upper hand" living their fantasy of getting to punish the whores who rode the chad cock carousel instead of settling down with a nice man and birthing kids. They think they themselves can still at 45 marry a 20-something virginal woman and start a family with her because daddy Elon told them they could and should and those dead egg women are left crying in the dust after all those babies they will never have. In reality most women who actually want and are able to have kids usually get to do so while scrotes who want to pass on their genes are left alone and the women who are voluntarily child free don't give a shit about a mentally ill incel narrative. They really have this "30something childless stacey who whored around in her 20s and refused to fuck you" archetype stuck in their heads like a broken record.

No. 348873

They believe shaming older women for waiting or deciding not to have kids will somehow make it more likely for the older women to go into panic and have kids with mentally ill or abusive men like themselves, which unfortunately sometimes works.
I knew a 40 or so year old woman whose abusive super religious ex cheated on her and after she went through trauma and got manipulated by him in her bad times, she got married and had a kid with him. Last I heard, she couldn't bond with the kid and the child will have a negligent mother and a cheating father.

No. 348876

Definitely, it's the ultimate revenge fantasy for incels. But also, their hatred of 30+ women isn't for an audience of 30+ women, it's a show they put on for younger women. To make them insecure, desperate, and in a blind rush to be with any man who will have them. The more women willing to settle for less due to time pressure, the better for any average moid trying to get a girl out of his league who he can treat like garbage.

They've always been youth obsessed but their view of age is getting more and more vitriolic and extreme thanks to manosphere/incel radicalization. It used to be about mocking 40+ women who want to get married but are still single due to insanely high standards (only wanting millionaire supermodels) - which is dumb incel shit, but not that crazy. Now it's about mocking 30 year old women just for existing, no matter what they look like, whether they want marriage/kids or how high their standards are. I haven't actually noticed any of this shit irl though, it seems entirely online.

No. 348905

No males don't look great past thirty please don't lie. Pretty much all males I see over 25 are balding if not completely bald, have huge pot bellies and messy beards. It doesn't matter how much they take care of themselves it's just biology. Testosterone ages the body rapidly.

No. 348948

Former semi-NEET and probably austistic, got my first "adult" job in my late 20s. I'm always living with the constant fear of losing my job in this new economic downturn.

In my 20s, I was a dumbass fujoshit coomer who only listened to anime OPs/EDs and never wore sunscreen. I quickly grew out of that upon getting a real job.

Still have some of the same habits as my 20s, but I'm also in the process of developing better habits. Not as terminally online as I used to be. I'm also healthier now, cooking more, improving skincare & losing weight, cleaning & staying tidy a lot more. My 30s are way better than my 20s ever were.

But all of this could disappear just as easily if I lose my job. I'm pretty terrified of falling into a deep depression again and relapsing into my old ways. Everyone has been telling me to work harder on my career and learn new skills but I'm just so overwhelmed by all my other responsibilities, which aren't much to the average person but feel like a lot to someone who was a shut-in for so much of her life. I'm getting better though. I am going to look into courses to improve my skills and hopefully land a better job one day.

One thing I struggle with is avoiding lifestyle inflation. I need to be more careful with my money. I am very careful about my grocery budget and I basically never go out to eat or do stuff, so I save a lot of money that way. But I waste a lot of money shopping online for shit I don't need, or is bad quality. I'm part of a lot of personal finance forums and learning better habits through those.

My current worry is interest rates and whether I'll be able to afford the mortgage on the property I'm planning to buy. I have enough money for a downpayment, but I'm not sure I can pass the stress test.

Thank fuck that I'm no longer obsessed with anime or manga the way I was. Watching literally every anime that came out every season just to keep up with everyone else. Had I spent a quarter of that time on some useful training or self care, I would have been in a much better place than where I am today. And sweet Jesus am I thankful that I didn't grow up with social media to the extent that Zoomers do now.

No. 348949

Damn nonnie, best of luck. There were older students in my courses in college and no one questioned why.

I think my life is taking the same trajectory as yours. My job feels pretty dead end, even though I was promoted with a slight salary bump. I also got a degree for the sake of it, since my parents pushed me into getting one. I never wanted to go to university in the first place.

The only difference is, I'm rather unmotivated & don't really care… as long as I have a job, I'm happy. I know what I need to do to get a better one. And I know that I'm capable of it, and the people I work with depend on me, so maybe the company can't let me go just yet.

I really need to move towards the next step in my career but I don't want to enter any rat race to the top. I just want to earn my keep and enjoy life. It's becoming increasingly harder to do with all these economic uncertainties that keep piling up with each decade. How do quiet quitters pull it off?

No. 348983

I'm so proud of you nonna and I'm wishing you all the best. When things get tough just think about how far you've come already!

With regards to struggling, everyone does - some people are just far better at hiding it.

No. 348988

File: 1694936786224.jpg (32.54 KB, 756x567, soairseronan.jpg)

30+ nonnas here: did/do you feel like you need to make a choice between being independent and having a relationship/family? I'm in my late 20s, I really value my independence and I really like to travel. All I save for is a future mortgage and a travel fund. I felt this way since my late teens, and I've never put arbitrary age-based goals on things (such as marriage/kids etc) because I feel like if I didn't hit those goals it would make me depressed. I wouldn't not count those things out but I wasn't aiming towards them.

But after my last birthday I started to feel more conflicted. I feel like having a committed long term relationship would make me happy but I can't force that with people and I haven't met anyone who I feel that way with.

Additionally, as someone who had (invertedly) neglectful parents and was raised primarily by my grandma I know what its like to not have parents around and I wouldn't want that for my children. But the conflict is that I just love travel so much and I just want to see everything - I know I can't have both and I feel like the next 10+ years of my life are going to be a time of deciding exactly what I want.

As much as I value my independence (and my drive to do what I want) I am also starting to feel more lonely, this didn't bother me when I was younger and I was honestly kind of content to be a volcel - but now I think it's really hitting me, I'm just scared to die alone one day.

So 30+ nonnas: Did any of you feel like this and if so, any womanly advice/wisdom you can offer?

No. 348991

This exactly. It's to hopefully make women panic and lower their standards to find a husband/bf asap and done by men who do not have many dating prospects trying to artificially widen their pool through trickery and fearmongering so they can secure a young and inexperienced (and often naive and low self-esteemed) woman to mold in to their ideal gf/wife (often meaning just a servant). People who truthfully want kids and not to trick women don't ree about women being eggless and hags the minute they turn 30. Men will forever cope about their sexual failure and the fact that most start going bald by that time kek.

No. 348992

I really don't see why you can't travel with a family if that's what you want.

No. 348993

>People who truthfully want kids and not to trick women don't ree about women being eggless and hags the minute they turn 30.
Considering how many couples do IVF, it doesn't even seem like being 'eggless' is a dealbreaker when it's a confirmed reality let alone unscientific speculation about fertility at arbitrary ages.

No. 348994

I'm OP: the answer is money my dear nonna. I'm not from money at all (grandma died penniless) and I doubt I'm going to find some wealthy man willing to wife me, or rather a man that I like that's also wealthy. I make enough to look after myself but not enough to be able to afford to take a family abroad.

You're right some places I really could (and would like to) take a family but there's a lot of places on my bucket list where I really wouldn't or it would be very intense for children. In the words of my mother "Why do you want to visit places where you're going to get blown up or shot at?"

No. 348996

Have you considered that your geriatric boyfriend might be the problem? Sperm quality declines fast after the age of 30. That's why they are not allowed to donate sperm after that age. Expired sperm increases the chances of miscarriage and disability. So many of you chase hideous men in their 40s and 50s and then wonder why you had to spent a fortune on fertility treatments just to get a potato baby.

No. 349000

wtf are you on about, I wasn't talking about myself or couples involving old men. My point is that women with fertility issues still have men so committed to being with them they'll go through the whole expensive, exhausting process of IVF. Meanwhile incels think just turning 30 means a woman will be unwanted based on her fertility.

No. 349012


No. 349019

I'm struggling with this right now too. I don't have a maternal bone in my body and I don't know what to do.

No. 349022

Not just money, traveling with kids means adjusting all of your destinations and plans to be kid-friendly, it restricts your options a lot. And you can't really relax when you have your kids with you on vacation, let's be real.

No. 349030

glad to know I'm not alone here nonna
exactly with regards to my bucketlist I'm leaving a lot of my safer/less intensive destinations (aka Europe/North America) at the bottom because at least if I hit my more daring goals early I won't need to drag any children across MENA countries or Asia.

No. 349043

I'm 28 and life is great, I'm excited to see what the next years bring. My younger 20s were very depressing years working crappy jobs, being poor etc. Now I've built a life for myself that I really love, I have hobbies, friends, a partner. I'm still into cringy weeb shit and vidya but I just don't care what people think anymore.

Style and looks wise I finally worked out my hair type and it no longer looks like shit all the time and I'm in the best physical shape I've ever been.

The incel cope is pure projection, men age worse and they fucking know it

No. 349062

I'm 32 today. I don't feel anywhere near 32 tbh. I've never had a long term relationship, don't have my own place, work a shit job… not feeling great nonas

No. 349159

Mid 30s now, technically the same as ever but since I was born I was always getting less interested and more depressive with ever year and after more than 30 of them I am just rather dead inside since there is nothing new and interesting out there I care about. Not sure how other people do this. Maybe I was just always depressive or something and with adult life being 500 times more boring than any year during childhood the depressions get much worse as well, no idea.

Currently NEETing again since having fulltime jobs makes me borderline suicidal. Was never interested in a relationship, I only ever cared about a few good friends I once had but somehow I feel like it's impossible to make genuine friendships as an adult and since they lack the whole "common origin" part they feel empty and other people feel alien.

No. 349182

I could have written this. The life long depression, how everything gets worse the older i get, the isolation, not being able to connect with people. I think we are just really ill.

No. 349183

It's sad but it calms me a bit to know that there are others. For the longest time I thought it was normal and that everybody else was just stronger than me and forcing themselves to live normal lives, but now I rather feel like most people in real life feel better, not worse, once they hit the 30s. I know so many that are more motivated than ever and painfully optimistic.

Thinking about it I cannot even muster enough motivation to draw what I should like. I drew so much as kid and till my early 20s. Now I force myself and need half a year for a single pic. Thing is that drawing is inherently emotion related, at least to me. I drew because I vented or expressed emotions. But now I lost them, so there is not enough to express anymore. You are probably right and we are just mentally fucked.

No. 349197

I'm here to tell you that I feel the same. I'm still hopeful that my interest in the living world will come back as I missed out on so much stuff being younger because of how self-destructive and depressed I have been back then.

I can also fully relate to the drawing stuff. I drew every day until I turned 20 and then I just stopped, I maybe have one picture that I drew the last 10+ years and it's sad. But I was way angrier and I feel like I had more emotions back then. It's amazing that what you have written is exactly like how I feel.

I'm still going on with my life, being a neet as I hate most humans, accumulating more knowledge, just wishing to be rich to be free of what society expects me to do and having to work until I die. People actually think that I know what I'm doing and that I'm not faking every single emotion they get from me. But like I wrote before, I still think that there is a possibility to get back what I felt years before, to be not this depressed anymore that I'm even too depressed to kill myself. I've survived so long, now I can add some more years just out of spite.
I hope you and nonna >>349182 will feel better one day and the three of us will have an amazing, quiet and nice life.

No. 349243

Second nonna here again, I used to do a ton of art too. I thought I'd go to art school. I don't think I drew more than 2 or 3 times in the last 7 years.
I really think we should seek help. I've been putting it off for so long because of bad experiences I had with therapists in my teens but living like I'm already dead isn't a solution. Good luck nonnies.

No. 349245

NTA but I used to draw so much in my youth too and eventually got really good at it. Then after submitting my final piece to my high school art exam that I worked extremely hard on and took months, I decided I was exhausted with art and I haven’t made any kind of art since in like a decade now. I can’t believe how creative I used to be and now I don’t have the inspiration or energy to do anything but consume other peoples media at best. It sucks, I wish I still had the will to create stuff.

No. 349252

File: 1695107817687.jpg (110.46 KB, 650x813, fran.jpg)

Friendly reminder for those of you feeling like 30+ is the end that Fran Drescher was in her mid 30s-early 40s when she was starring in The Nanny.
Incels seethe harder.

No. 349253

a queen, an icon.

No. 349269

Oh my god she was my first tv crush as a kid lmao I watched reruns of the Nanny with sparkling eyes full of hearts tbh she gave me a type kek

No. 349307

I feel this way at times, but most of the pressure about kids/family comes from my parents and just how much emphasis society puts on it. I can imagine a happy life that way, but tbh I like being able to do anything I want when I want and think I might end up miserable if I was tied down and didn’t have time for the stuff that does actively make me happy. I used to tell my mom I didn’t really want kids and that hasn’t really changed now that I’m mid-thirties. The only way I would is if I had a wife who really wanted them. I do worry for how things will be when I’m old and senile though. Hopefully I’ll die in an accident at like 70 or something.

No. 349337

OP Here: Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts nonna. I completely share your thoughts about wanting to be able to do something when I want and I do think I would be miserable if I couldn't. Whilst I have this mentality I know it would be incredibly cruel to have children and raise them like this. I've always considered adoption, as that means I don't need to worry about a time limit on conceiving my own children.

With regards to growing old and senile I'm annoyed that assisted suicide is not an option - I don't want to become a prisoner in my body and as soon as I lose control I want out.

No. 349355

My only beef with being in my 30s is that every decent man I've ever been with wants kids. The ones that didn't were weird internet communists, edgy alt guys and the like. Even my current bf wants them, but it's so easy for men to want kids when they aren't the ones putting their everything on the line. I feel like I have to either choose companionship or eternal solitude. And to be honest, I'd love the solitude if I had the money to move into a castle and have hired help, Enya-style. As it is I detest the thought of just being a wagie that everyone pities and feels sorry for, even if I'm very happy without kids. People looking down on me hurts more than childlessness ever will.

No. 349365

How do y’all feel about that popular phrase “30s is the new 20s”, is this accurate? For me, I feel like it could be. I haven’t changed much physically or mentally. I’m still the same person that I was at 20 - but with more money and stability. What do nonnies think? In this day and age are 30s just an extension of 20s?

No. 349367

Please give positive or reasonable responses to this one because the idea itself gives me hope and I come here to be uplifted since I’ve been fearing the great big 30 since 20 lol

No. 349368

I feel you, I never wanted kids and I also dread the thought of people treating me worse because of being childless. But we shouldn't create new human beings just because society wants us to, even when we don't even want it

No. 349373

I really need support from some over 30s girlies, some positive talk and encouraging stories because I hit 28, almost 29 and I’m terrified. Whenever I think about my age I have a panic attack. Need positive perspective. Specifically in regards to looks/still being attractive past 30. Please help! I’m so so scared.

No. 349380

It's hard to feel inclined to help or support someone who seems to think anyone over 30 is a hideous old hag, you've met women a year older than you before, right? Did you have a panic attack about how much uglier they are than you? Get therapy and stop being so fucking vain.

No. 349383

I wouldn't agree with that statement at all personally from what I remember doing in my 20s and what I'm doing now in my 30s.

One of my law professors back in uni said it best, the 20s is an unstable period of finding yourself out and trying different stuff out like in teen years but with the freedom of being an actual adult. So you kinda tend to start stuff, or do spontaneous things like visiting people you befriended at a meet and greet in a big town/during a convention, you meet different types of people. And you discover that the grass isn't greener elsewhere or people aren't as nice as they make themselves out to be. And you slowly learn that you gotta rely on yourself to get some shit done, nobody will do your tax declaration or job search for you after uni.

Then in your 30s you kinda figured out what you're about, you get your career path, living in your own flat/apartment/house without roommates figured out and/or family goals. And hopefully because of the 20s you went through, you know the traps to avoid with colleagues, with life/work balance, with savings etc.

Maybe it's because I've had 7 years of my 20s that were rough that I can't call my chill 30s "the new 20s", other nonnas might agree with that statement of yours. I personally rate the 30s as better for someone who seeks mental stability than to call them the new 20s when I know the mental instability I have been at then.

No. 349385

You realize that somebody's insecurities and fears aren't a personal insult to you, right? I am in the same shoes as that anon and I have similar thoughts - NOT because I think lowly women over 30, but because it is a new and unfamiliar stage of my life. She was just looking for reassurance ffs

No. 349386

Odd question but will 20-something women always be more beautiful and “wanted” by most men as compared to 30+, or is it just a meme? Is it possible to be more beautiful than a 20yo at 30+? I just want to know.

No. 349387

She's having PANIC ATTACKS over this shit, that's not the same as being a bit nervous about a new stage of your life. I can't even imagine the disdain she must feel for other women if she's that terrified of becoming one of them.

No. 349388

Thank you lol exactly

No. 349397

I feel no disdain towards older woman. But I am scared of getting older, on a personal level. My biggest fear is the passage of time. It really causes me to panic. Everyone says 20s are supposed to be your prime and the best years of your life, and I’ve heard men say 20-somethings are preferable and more beautiful. Which is hurtful to me as I approach 30, and probably the patriarchy caused this but I’m afraid of losing my looks and value in the eyes of society

No. 349398

Honestly, I’ve enjoyed my 30s so much more than my 20s. I feel so much less insecure than I did. I know it’s not the case for everyone, but it has been for me personally.
I felt this feeling so much when I was in my 20s. The “hurt”. Now that I’m past the that period of my life, the anxiety of aging has seemed to get less. You will always have value nona, and despite what some men will think, there will always be people who admire and find you beautiful at any age.

No. 349400

It's redpill/manosphere fantasy from the online loser dateless men who believe they're "average", their "preferences" matter, and woe the average men is lonely.
There was a moment when a discount redpill influencer was online bragging about pulling women onto his (rented) yacht and that he doesn't do women under 25. One of the women came out a few days later saying he (and RP influencers do this too) hired her and the other girls from OnlyFans and also they're 30+, but these dumbfucks can't tell the age of women. They also date women from sugaring sites who lie about their age too.
But honestly, most socially normal average men aren't like this. Most men and women date and marry within age range. The average age gap for marriage is like 2~3 years. Most normal people want someone relatable.

And I didn't really get my life and routine together until my very late 20s (when I got my career). Working out, yoga, eat healthy, etc so now I feel and look better than I did younger and lazy. Wear sunscreen and figure out a skincare routine (retinal, moisturizer, vit c). Most people look as good or better in their 30s because of skincare, finally have money to be comfortable, got their shit together, etc. So don't worry about it too much if you can follow a healthy lifestyle.

No. 349431

>assisted suicide
Ayrt and Me. Too. I know people view it as taboo, but I truly think it should be allowed within reason so that people can choose to die in a medically safe way, especially if they don’t have anyone to help care for them as they age (or for the reasons it does exist wrt terminal illness). It’s so much more humane than someone going out by shooting themselves or taking loads of pills. Sorry to derail but I agree with you on that.

No. 349435

Idk why people think their looks will 100% fade in their 30s. There are a ton of women I think are in their twenties and later find out that they’re actually thirty-something. These hangups are weird and unhealthy. You don’t become a grandma overnight. Just take care of yourself with food/exercise/water/sunscreen and you’ll probably be doing yourself a load of favor. Plus, being confident about how you look no matter what your age is endlessly more attractive than stressing out about it and being neurotic over it 24/7. One of the most depressing things to me is watching women in their 30s/40s/50s who obsess over looking young forever. I know society influences this way of thinking but it’s so unfortunate. Would rather be with someone or be friends with someone who embraces the wrinkles and gray hairs they obtain rather than having a meltdown over every new one. Sorry to sound harsh, but the mindset is bad for you and everyone who interacts with you.

No. 349453

This as fuck lmao I’m 32 and constantly am mistaken for 21-25 by…pretty much anyone who doesn’t know me. Most of my friends are the same. As long as you are healthy and take good care of your skin/use a lot of SPF, you’re not going to look much different from your 20s. You may lose some baby fat and have poppin cheekbones too, which is dope. That being said I also agree that the trap of women thinking they need to look forever youthful to be beautiful/desirable is moid created garbage. Some of my fav pretty actresses have become even more beautiful to me now that they’re in their 40s-50s.

No. 349474

>I've been putting it off for so long because of bad experiences I had with therapists in my teens
First poster here, same here. Though I think it helps that years or decades have passed since then and that we are adults that can properly talk about what's bothering us now. As teen everybody just assumed I was crazy or weird so they shoved the kid into the therapists' room to make it normal, but they were clearly not trained for the problems I had. It was obvious that the problems they usually dealt with were kids with love trouble, fear of bad school grades or mundane issues with the parents, not kids that were depressive, autistic or something along the lines.
It's probably depression I think. Or a mix between depression and ADHD. Not that I got any proper help so far. Finding a therapist is literally impossible here and psychiatrists are often mediocre and don't even take the time to listen. Well, we should at least try I think.

My cousin I only recently told me that he relies on antidepressants. He is the typical juvenile middle aged cool guy I never expected to have this. But my other cousin (his sister) committed suicide years ago, so I think we should at least try to get that checked because it sounds like it was slowly worsening for all of us. Probably because the issue itself causes further issues like the inability to work for longer periods and that more years are passing in which I try but fail to do anything, making me more pessimistic and tired.

I totally relate with this. I drew so much, then I visited an art school were I was forced to draw and even after quitting soonish, after half a year or so, I was stunned and incapable of even doing a sketch for years and generally drew less ever since, even when I was still drawing more.
I think I can only do what I really wanted to and it needs to be personal, take that away and a formerly great hobby gets tainted. This is why I swore to myself to never ever do commissions even if I should learn to draw more regularly again, even after people asked me for it.
>other peoples media at best. It sucks, I wish I still had the will to create stuff.
Same. I once even drew tons of manga pages of own stories and worked on a RPG maker game for two years. Time of my life, despite the social isolation (though I wasn't even craving anything else). I wish I could get that back.

No. 349488

Turned 30 5 months ago, so far yes absolutely. Lots of people say your 30s is like your 20s but with money and I disagree. It's not even about the money. I just felt my brain switch from "I hate myself, I'm so cringe and everyone hates me" to "I'm kind of a Stacy actually" in the first few weeks. Mental illness? Don't know her.
The best part is I don't give a fuck about anything anymore. I don't care if I'm ugly, I like how I look. I don't care about other people's opinions, I like how I dress. I've been so confident it's unreal. I'm even better in bed. I feel so silly for having literally cried about turning 30 for the past 5 years. It's great.
Worst part is pimply teens on the internet calling you 'middle aged' and using your age as an insult, and incels posting egg carton pictures, but trust me you'll live.

No. 349678

The discussions about "looks fading" itt makes me glad that I've always been ugly kek, nothing to fade here

No. 349830

File: 1695497640001.gif (846.95 KB, 372x200, source.gif)

I feel so hopeless. My 20s were so miserable and went by so fast, mentally I'm still at the same point as after hs graduation, same interests, same dreams, everything. I only survived this far by constantly fleeing into daydreams - which make the reality feel even worse.
When I was younger I somehow never imagined that I had a life after 30, everything I like and always wanted are young people things. I can't and don't want to imagine myself as not young.
This week I got my first big girl paycheck and seeing that sum made me feel so detached from reality, like what am I supposed to do with this, I don't need or want that much money and much less that job, I just want to finally be happy…

At 20 I somehow always assumed all my problems would fix itself, that I'd magically stop being a weeb and on imageboards in my mid 20s, that I'd suddenly know what I want in life, that I'd just happen to find hobbies, friends and a partner, but instead nothing. Each year just gets worse. Back then young me reading about lc anons like todays me would have found me so pathetic.
At 25 I finally started therapy, thinking this is still youngish and that I'd be fixed by now but again, nothing. Instead all those other shit suddenly hits me too, like the fear of turning 30, feeling jealous of my thriving 18yo sister, suddenly believing incels and thinking I will die alone if I don't get kids immediately and so on.
I feel like I have to make a decision right now - either my unrealistic dreams which likely end in loneliness or having a family which likely ends in deep regret…

If I was a moid I'd likely already packed my bags and gone to LA or Tokyo. Technically there probably are more famous women but only because they sold their body and soul. Meanwhile moids can make it anywhere at any age, not just in Hollywood but in any career. And at the same time they don't need to give up family either. Or they can just start one at 50, they have endless choices.
Recently I read that David Bowie had a baby in his early 20s, while he was still trying to make it. And afterward he led a crazy wild life. But that doesn't matter, he got women anyway because women don't care and give their partner any freedom on earth. For them having a family or not doesn't have to change any of their dreams. Meanwhile if I as a woman close to 30 told a moid that I'm not content with my boring job and that I can't imagine myself having children in any near future, I'd be seen as unstable and undateable. If I hear muh 5-year-plan one more time I swear…
It just feels so unfair that they don't need to make this insanely difficult decision like us.
My biggest wish is probably to go back in time and try to grow up normal or to stop time and live as my parents child forever, I'm just a failure of an adult.

No. 349836

>Meanwhile moids can make it anywhere at any age, not just in Hollywood but in any career. And at the same time they don't need to give up family either. Or they can just start one at 50, they have endless choices
This, it's so unfair. But I also want all of us to remember that it keeps happening even now because there are women enabling this lifestyle for men. There are women who are ok with this. If there was no women content with taking care of children and houses for men, the men couldn't live in Neverland forever and fuck around forever
I know it's also important to remember that, generally speaking, most men can't allow this life either and they are unwantwd and undatable. But it still makes me envy those men who can live like this, even though that's not general male population I think. I also dreamed once about being a famous artist, an actress or a musician. But I grew more bitter over time, seeing what women had to do in order to become famous compared to what men had to do… it was laughable. I could never do this. I still have hopes for becoming a digital and traditional artist though, and maybe a streamer (I would mostly stream art). But even that makes me paranoid. If I revealed that I'm a female, they would sooner or later find out my age somehow and I'm scared how that would affect my position. I never had any social media so they wouldn't find my data online, but I think that at one point someone who knew or still knows me irl could recognize me and post my age. Maybe it's better to just never show my face or wear a fucking mask or something

No. 349847

I'm nearing 30 and began to notice how early 20s women dominate my hobbies and the places I like to hang out at. Feels like people my age are doing more domestic things I guess, I'm in a weird spot where I don't want younger friends but I keep having to share social spaces with people younger than me.

No. 349857

I discovered I really love going to metalcore and barely-metalcore nucore concerts, being in the pits, but almost everyone there is college aged or younger, and the bands are younger than me too. I turned 30 in July and started going over a year ago. I never felt I belonged anywhere in my life so it sucks that this too I’m out because of my age.

No. 349861

This is sort of happening to me online. Just when I'm starting to feel comfortable about myself in my late 20s (because I stopped being insecure about being "too old" for things), I notice people the same age leaving behind hobby communities and younger people coming in.

No. 349863

Every year I have less and less in common with my group of friends. I'm finally throwing in the towel and trying to make new friends but yeah >>349847 this right here. I told one girl I went to my first con in 2003 and she wanted me to tell her stories about the good ol' days like I'm her grandma or something.

On the other hand, half the groups I join I'm the youngest there by 30 years. I managed to find one meetup group with some women closer to my age, but they all have children and it's literally all they talk about. I just want some girlfriends to hang out with who don't have kids to put to bed or homework due in the morning

No. 349864

File: 1695524386022.jpg (41.84 KB, 625x338, tobeing30.jpg)

I'm going to soon be in my mid 30's and I feel nothing because age is meaningless to me as a legal adult. The main thing I learned after turning 30 was to just stop giving so much of a fuck. There will always be someone younger than me, more attractive, more stable in their life, more accomplished and it is what it is. I learned to stop listening to others opinions that have nothing to do with me. I got sterilized despite my parents being upset they will never have grandchildren because fuck them kids I have never been "maternal", and its not my fucking job to make others happy at the expense of myself. Shit has always been the same, I've just gained insight through life experience. I tried the traditional route of getting married, going to school and having a career to support my future family but I always go back to my true self. I am not a mother, I am not a wife, I'm not a dog of the state, I'm a motherfucking autonomous person dammit. It's my life and I will choose to live it out the way I'd like it to be. Being a woman in this world is hard but I haven't felt so in touch with the power women hold until now. I live my life with one thing in mind, never saying "I wish I did xyz". If you wanna do it then do it, and if anyone catches an attitude fuck em.

No. 349868

God I feel this so much. Hobby groups are either just young kids, so it makes you even more conscious about being old(er), or it's people your age who only care about weddings or worse kids, or it's older women whose kids are out of their house or they're retired and therefore bored and picking up hobbies again.
Where are all those unmarried women everybody is talking about?
What makes it more difficult for me is that I don't have any positive non-traditional rolemodels in my life, I only know older married women. I'm scared that the unmarried ones really are lonely and hiding in their homes, or that they don't really exist, that getting married is so natural that just everybody does it and so should I?

I know that not all moids do this but at least they can afford to try.
When I was younger I always wanted to live life without regret but now it suddenly feels as if the risks are just way too high…

No. 349871

good for you nona. do your motherfucking thing

No. 349888

I'm in my late 20s with a lot of friends turning 30 soon and when they seem bummed out I always say to them "but you're gonna be thirty, flirty and thriving" because of this movie kek

No. 349893

I’m nearing the wrong side of 35. I have accomplished absolutely nothing in terms of what is the cultural norm for humans.
I don’t have a good job, I’m not married, I don’t have children (I don’t want kids) or own any property.
I am not poor or in any debt, but I have no friends and crippling anxiety.
My advice is (if you’re in the same position/feel anxious) please for the love of god just have fun. Do all the things that make you happy, spend the money, book that holiday, buy that car.
When you get old and die none of that stuff goes with you.
I have been miserable for years and I’m only just coming to terms with the fact none of this bullshit really matters as long as you are happy and healthy.

No. 349906

Amen, nonna. I’m right there with you.

No. 349907

I'm 28 and this year it was like a switch flipped. I've started eating better and exercising, which is resulting in weightloss. I'm still obese but it is going down. I started actually making time for all the things I have wanted to do and can keep a good schedule.

My mental health is better and I'm doing well in my career. The only things I haven't been able to do yet is buy a house or be in a relationship. I'm in the process of saving for a deposit and by then I'm expecting some payrises and/or a promotion which will make it a lot easy. The fact I have never been in a relationship hurts a lot less than it did before. And although I want one I would be fine to be on my own, especially in a place of my own. I like my own company. I can't wait to be entering my 30s because it'll mean I have progressed even further and improved. I'll be a healthy weight and good job.

No. 349919

I think I'm delusional about my age because despite being 28 people still assume I'm like 20 not only because of my looks but also because of my stunted behavior, and I'm always paranoid they will find out my actual age. I'm scared to think how I would behave if I didn't look that young. I also can't find a place for myself. I'm nothing like the people my age I know; I'm not in the dating field, I never dated anyone actually, I'm not interested in having a family, at least for now, I don't have a serious career etc. But at the same time I feel too old to be around actual 20 year olds. There's no place for me to go honestly and I don't know what to do in order to create some kind of a social circle

No. 349947

I'm early 30s and I feel similar, I feel out of place with 28+ women in real life and a lot of 20+ year olds are super immature. Ironically, people tend to think I'm cool and are impressed when they find out my age (I mask my spergery at work), but I feel like I wasted too much of my 20s and am lacking life experience I should've had. I lost contact with my highschool friends a decade ago and most late 20s-early 30s seem to be settled in their friend groups or lifestyle to want to find more.

No. 349968

File: 1695629404784.gif (394.6 KB, 400x218, IMG_3012.gif)

I’m 33 and feel like I had a fairly uncommon 20s experience than my friends. I had a kid pretty early (like before the legal drinking age) graduated college with a BA but ended not using it because clients have shit taste, and got married at 25. I knew him since middle school and was not gonna risk playing the field and possibly exposing my daughter to some sick fuck.

My 20s were filled with a constant pressure to provide her a better life and not become exactly what the world already thought of young, single unwed mothers. I dont resent her for that, but i resent the unfair expectations held on moms vs dads.

My girlfriends are all single without kids so I live vicariously through them. I love hearing about their trips to Thailand or about the cute guy in their apartment building. Unfortunately they're also all scared theyll end up alone. The one that hits hardest is my sister whos a bit older. Shes constantly traveling and meeting up with old friends but once told me she just wants to feel wanted. Meanwhile I’m on the other side wishing I had the time and freedom she does. Is the grass not green enough on the other side no matter what?

No. 349973

There's pros and cons to every situation, I think people have a hard time seeing and appreciating the nice things about their situation when they look at the desireable parts of another's situation.

No. 349996

I’m glad you shared your story, nonna. I’m one of the people on the other side (unmarried, no kids), but I honestly appreciate hearing about the people who did these things early, and I do think it takes a weird bit of bravery to talk about it more candidly because women are so expected to adore marriage and children. If nothing else, I hope you get to travel and do a lot of fun stuff when your kid gets older, and I hope you’re doing well now overall.

No. 350008

I turn 30 next spring and truthfully I'm the happiest I've ever been. My childhood was absolutely shit, my teenage years were also shit, early twenties filled with terrible decisions and alcoholism. I met my nigel at 24 and we've been together since. We have a daughter, a business and another child on the way. There are days when I'm super pissed at my nigel for being a man, but he's a genuinely good guy and would do anything for us. I adore my daughter, and I'm more confident than I've ever been in my entire life. When I hit 30 I think I'll feel like I hit a milestone. I'm not dead, we're successful and have a really cute family. We broke the cycle of abuse I was exposed to and our entire family has rallied around my daughter which has been awesome. Truly it's night and day, so I guess I feel like the next decade is going to be the best of my life. I'm stoked. As a teen I was terrified of being 30, now I'm embracing it fully. Really glad so many nonnas feel the same despite different situations.

No. 350043

File: 1695706044474.jpg (163.21 KB, 1039x1390, karenmaxxing.jpg)

how i handle it: buy midlife crisis floor loom, steal plant cuttings constantly, & consider it all apart of my karensona.

No. 350128

File: 1695769057067.jpg (95.53 KB, 800x1000, PREVIEW Live This Long.jpg)

I'm going to be 30 next year and I didn't think it would hit me this hard, but it has. Originally I was planning on killing myself right after high school, and have tried a couple of times but was stopped. I never put any effort into my future since I figured I was going to die soon anyway, and now here I am 10 years later with nothing to show for it except a crappy retail job I've begun to resent, no higher schooling whatsoever, no skills, and a dwindling friend circle. I have a small business selling my art but even with both of my incomes combined I make less than 20k, and now my illness and anxiety has made it extremely hard to work. I blamed external reasons before, but really this is all my own fault. Once I'm done with my pity party, I can either try to get my shit together or die. We'll see which one I pick.

No. 350162

Hey nonnie, I’m in the exact same boat. I wish we could be friends. You sound a lot like me… I was reading this post thinking “did I post this?”. Wish I could reach out. Regardless I suppose we’re in this together.

No. 350173

I turned 35 a couple weeks ago. If you make it to my age unmarried you'll be probably like one or two of your female peers who aren't. People have been marrying later, it's true, but by 35 most of your old HS/college friends will have been married if only briefly.
Anyway, this changes the dynamic between you and your married friends. They'll assume you want to be married, try to set you up with guys, or at least recommend guys to you. Even if they complain about their marriages constantly they'll do this. It's really annoying. Oh and you get to see them less because couples often have these dinner parties that are unofficially on a 'couples only' guest list.

No. 350207

Aww nonnie, ive been feeling funny about entering my 20s, but to hear that you’ve made it work, and that you can break cycles of abuse, really gives me hope. I’m glad you have success and confidence, I hope to get to where you are ♥

No. 350243

I feel like this dynamic shift already happened in my early 20s when they all had mostly steady partners, then they all got married and had babies while I was still in uni, so I felt like we're living completely different lifes.
Nobody ever tried to set me up tho, I guess I don't have close enough friends for that…

I'm so fucking worried about never finding a bf the older I get because I don't want to settle. Sometimes I feel downright pedoish because white moids above 20 look tragic. And once they're approaching 30, they're all fat, bearded, balding and so boring, plus likely expect you to want babies because as a moid why not?

I wonder whether I should study again. I actually just finished (my major takes a long time in my country) and now have a high paying job, employed by the state.
But I hate it so much. Plus I'm not ready to be a proper adult yet, I never got to enjoy being young, so I kinda want a second chance? But if I didn't manage to make friends and have fun in uni at 20, how should I manage as an older student…
Everything feels so hopeless, this is the opposite of what I imagened my life would be when I was a child.

No. 350291

Yep it's already happening with my friend group. And the worst thing is when they suggest someone and the guy is just a massive ugly incel. Like is this the best they think I can get? I know I'm worth more than that at least.

No. 350296


It’s a shit show, just like social media is now. The internet sucks and was my only outlet for years.

I spent all of my 20s hiding from my abusive family via a narc relationship & he left me for a 19 y/o. My life is currently the opposite of everything I worked towards. I have no degrees, no car, no career, no apartment, no hobbies, no friends, no passion, no faith. I used to have/be achieving all of that successfully though. But I fucked it all up & tbh death is preferred. I ended up in a psych ward from it all & nothing has felt real since. Every day is a nightmare. Working up the courage to down pills on 30th coming up

No. 350311

Nonnie, you and I are in a similar boat. I dreamed of romance ever since I was a kid, in many ways because of my parents' happy marriage. I also feel a lot of pressure to find a good person to settle down with now that I am approaching my 30s because like you said, the longer we wait to find a romantic partner, the less good choices we'll have. It's really not a meme that good guys get snatched up fast, whereas there are brilliant single women across all age ranges.

But I think it's even worse for our generation! In a month, I can honestly count the number of guys I have found attractive on the street where I live. It's not a big city, but it's also not the middle of nowhere. You cannot deny that the internet has ruined men. There's this one guy who works in a different department from me and from our interactions, I thought he was 35 at best. He has balding unkempt greasy hair, horrible style, and is overweight. One day we were talking and he goes "oh, I just turned 25!" And I was like???? No fucking way you're younger than I am and you look like this!!!

But nonna, don't give up finding friends at an older age! I found my best friends while living abroad, completely by happenstance. You never know when and where you find people you click with. Don't give up on happiness and silliness in life!

No. 350400

Hi anon, I dropped a throwaway. It would be nice to talk to someone in a similar situation.

No. 350405

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Still 28, but I'll be 29 in a couple of months. During the new years transition into 2020, I felt this horrible pang of dread realizing that youth was passing me by, but that dissipated instantly once the clock struck midnight. Approaching the end of my 20's doesn't feel that way to me, at least not yet, but hopefully it just doesn't rise at all. On the contrary, my husband is sweating about turning 30 this year, kek. I'm ready to gracefully enter this new decade of my life; it's not like it really has a meaning unless I give it one, I'm a healthy individual even compared to my colleagues in their early 20s. I am finishing up my Associates at a community college this semester, finally, and I anticipate that when I go on to uni, I may feel embarrassed by those 10 years younger than me taking the dame courses. Oh, well!

No. 350412

>leave family to be with pedo male
>spend her youth worshipping pedo male instead of studying, working, investing etc.
>Hope to one day marry him and have him support you fully
>Pedo male leaves you because you're 30,unemployed, broke and mentally ill
The average tradwife wannabe timeline

No. 350414

Anon it’s pretty hard to kill yourself with just pills, especially if they’re just over the counter. I’d recommend not going through with that particular plan because it’ll likely just give you more hospital bills and physical pain.

No. 350416

Suicide bait in the vent thread next time.

No. 350418

I was in a similar situation to you so I kinda get it. Before you kill yourself try to do something else drastic but non-deadly like move long distance and get a job in hotels (not that it’s an awesome job it just has a lot of entry level positions and upward movement for lifeless zombies who can do fake-it-til-you-make-it and don’t have a lot going on in their lives so they can work all hours to distract from wanting to die.) it really helped me and I made money to travel and had a better life.

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