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gender critical and female politics
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No. 6864

Family member trooning out? Boyfriend talking about "dysphoria"? Best friend wants to become a boy? Has someone important to you drunk the kool-aid, and you're unsure as to what to do?

Come here to grieve, give advice or just vent.

No. 6865

My brother is currently in the process of becoming a TIM, and I feel very powerless. It's been brewing for a long time, thanks to discord and reddit communities, and now he's going to start taking actual steps. However, he won't talk to me or his mother about it. He's touchy in general and shuts down over any difficult conversation. Sperg, intelligent but unmotivated, internet addicted, socially isolated and neglected growing up. It's almost hopeless seeing how much of a "perfect storm" it is for him to troon out, I don't really know how to address it.

No. 6868

he's too far gone nonnie

No. 6869

That's really really difficult, sorry nona. You sound like a caring sister but I'm not sure what you would be able to do, especially as he is touchy about the subject. Hope you get some better advice and support here.

No. 6870

Maybe try to sit down w him and ask him what makes him think he is a woman? Then gently debunk every single one of his beliefs. Also, I know in the MTF thread people said to show pics of rot pockets and I think that should be an option as well. It does sound like he may be too far gone though, I hate this stupid gender cult and the incels who propagate it

No. 6871

I have a friend back in uni who I reconnected with before I peaked. Our last time chatting she mentioned starting to wear binders and right now it hurts to think about her future, the repercussions of binding your chest, shortness of breath and all.

Same with an online friend who started puberty blockers as a minor, I can see myself in her because she's porn addicted as I was. I find it hard to talk to her knowing the health risks associated to puberty blockers then T.

I keep justifying it to myself like it's as if you have a conservative religious friend whose religion requires them to smoke cigarettes and eventually contract lung cancer or something.

It feels off just watching a slow burn train crash and not being able to do anything about it without being outted as a terf.

No. 6873

My son.

I can't even type it out.

No. 6875

My former childhood best friend. She’s autistic and has always liked yaoi but now she’s a full on TIF complete with retarded political takes. She’s 5’4, very fat and not conventionally attractive and she really thinks she’s gonna become some sort of tall anime bishie when she gets top surgery or T. She still lives with her parents at 27 and has no life outside of anime bullshit, it’s just sad. I think if she’d left our hometown at some point and experienced life outside of her online sphere she might’ve turned out different, but alas you just can’t help some people. She’s also a virgin and ‘loves’ BDSM and shit like that kek. I hate knowing that if she just listened to me she’d probably be better off but she’s always been infuriatingly obstinate despite her complete lack of any sort of real life experience. On one hand I kinda want her to face some real consequences but obvs I don’t want her to have the side effects of t etc.

No. 6877

My friend claimed a nonbinary identity last year, and now is binding full time, recently legally changed her name to a 'gender-neutral' one, uses neutral grammatical gender (and in my native language you have to inflect verbs by gender every time you address someone in the second person, so if you talk to her with feminine verbs she gets offended), all she talks about now is how victimized she feels by being 'misgendered'. She said that she tearfully came out to her mother during family dinner and her mom just said 'okay, do you want any more potatoes' in response kek

At the same time she says she's a lesbian and loves pussy. She's in her mid twenties, has never been in a relationship with anyone and is a virgin. Before the trooning she claimed various mental illness diagnoses, from severe intractable treatment-resistant depression that can only be cured by an experimental brain implant to schizoid personality disorder.
I could put up with the cringy self-diagnosing but the enby identity is getting on my nerves.

No. 6880

I’m so sorry

No. 6881

A very good friend of mine from highschool is going back and forth on whether he is trans or not. He is just gender nonconforming, which has always made him an interesting person, but he moved to Portland and is surrounded by people who encourage transition. I'm struggling with accpeting it.

No. 6882

My little sister (seven years younger) claims to be dysphoric and is even seeing a therapist specialized in that kind of issues, a former (hsts) classmate saw the same therapist so I guess he/she is pro-transition.
My parents had a difficult divorce three years ago and she started to identify as non binary around six months in.
I am a CSA victim (that played a huge role in the divorce because my mother always tried to hide it from my dad) and developed an ED and dysphoria right after, among other coping mechanisms (my unhealthy love for that kind of military history), and I think my sister is trying to copy me, I don't think I am paranoid or something because she used to roleplay as me on children's games and later on more adult websites, she even took compromising pictures of me to share to the people she talked to, she was around 11-13 and she's now 18. I had to tell her online boyfriends (that were my age) the person they were talking to was in fact a middle schooler and that they should fuck off and never contact her again.

No. 6887

One of my friends wants to get a penis and troon out and the like and I want to tell her it's because of her trauma (she was severely sexually abused as a child to the point where she can't remember half of it due to dissociation shit) but I'll obviously lose her, she's been a great friend to me for years and it would really sting if she left. Sigh.

No. 6900

One of my close girl friends says she's "enby" for cutting her hair short, growing armpit hair and feeling good in loose clothes in contrast of over sexualized dresses
I am so sad.

No. 6982

Found out my tif acquaintance wasn't tif because she has internalized homophobia but that she's just another straight woman who consumed too much fucked up bl porn.

No. 6986

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My oldest friend said to me in a FaceTime months ago that “once she sorts out her mental health” she’s going to transition. She knows my TERF status so was definitely expecting a reaction from me, but I said nothing. I definitely couldn’t fake it and say “go for it”, or “I support you”. I didn’t want her to completely cut me off and get angry if I said that she shouldn’t do it. The only thing that felt right was to say nothing. We hardly speak now. She was my rock when I was 12 and terminally online with no friends. I always looked up to her in a big sister way and growing up together, seeing her mental health decline, has been really difficult. She’s had a lot of trauma with men, lots of family drama and she told me she got into bad crowds and started doing hard drugs. She was on drugs the night she told me she wanted to transition, I could tell. I think she was on molly, which she used to be addicted to. She also told me that she’s going to get her breasts cut off and her insurance will pay for it. I just hate how this cult devours people already struggling with mental health issues and addictions. All I can do is hope she doesn’t go through with it. I’m scared to tell her how I really feel because sometimes it makes the person entrapped in the cult double down in stubbornness, and if I get cut off from them I’ll be powerless to do anything anyway.

No. 6987

If you care, try to save her by telling her it's a bad idea. She might get mad and never talk to you again, but if you don't you lose her to the trans cult anyway.

Ask her why not following sexist stereotypes makes her less female, or even not female at all. And why she thinks being less/not a female is better.

No. 6990

I lost my best weeb friend almost a decade ago to transitioning. Even after she transitioned, we still hung out, but soon everything we used to do together was too "feminine" for her. Even though ironically enough I was more masc than her. Actually ruined being a weeb for me. I know it's retarded to still be upset about this almost a decade later, but I've never come across someone irl again who was the same level of nerdy and weeb. Her family also always made me feel really welcome.
Now my ex gf has started transitioning too, even legally changed her name and didn't even tell me (we were still friends), because she knows I have terfy opinions.
I still have some cool acquaintances (they're not friend-level close to me imo) and one great friend, but she lives really far away and it sucks to just have nobody else left near me.

No. 6992

Maybe you could try relating to her concerns, usually TIFs have issues with internalized sexism. If she suggests that maybe you are trans too, you could the use that as an opportunity to explain that those discomforts are a universal female experience, not a male one.

No. 7233

No father?

No. 7241

'Lost' a previous radfem friend I had because her niece decided to start HRT. In the early days of the news she mentioned that it was going to be tough but in the interest of being a supportive auntie and family member she'd keep her objections to herself and just be there for the girl.
A year on the kid is more of a shit than ever, my friend is on the trans ideology train and I don't know what spurred her on or what it would take to get her off again. It's frustrating as she was the only openly loud and proud radfem I had ever known but I guess in the interest of her own sanity she had to succumb to the hivemind brain? To top it all off she's a tenured science educator who previously used her knowledge to back her own points up but these days doesn't want to hear a bar of anything that would threaten her current worldview and it fucking sucks

No. 7253

I lost my bestie about two years ago to trans ideology. We were both terf-y, myself detrans. I could type paragraphs but I'll spare the ramble. It has been rough to grieve, even today. I feel mad, hurt, betrayed, worried, sad, concerned, lonely. I feel ill as I watch those around us support her, I tried so hard to help her and ended up discarded in the most hateful way. I lost my entire friend group as she waited months to tell me her new name/pronouns after everyone else already knew- effectively making me out to be misgendering her the entire time. I was told my history meant I was stupid and didn't know my own gender. I had kept my phone on my side 24/7 for her, I fed her, I gave her good chunks of my income to support her, drove her, cleaned for her, helped her with her hobbies and was told I was never there for her. I know she was manipulating me now but it still hurts, I tried so hard to help her. She has gotten worse & struggled more since, I fear for her. Even with all the hurt she caused I hate to see her heading down what is such a doomed future at the pace she is. I've spent many days, therapy sessions, grieving her and our friendship but I don't think I'll ever get over it. I can never speak to her again but man do I have a lot I would say. I haven't seen her in person since but I know one day it'll happen. I don't think I'm ready to see what she's done to herself. We were so close and friends for years… I wonder what she thinks of all this.

No. 7259

Are you a moid? Only males think the father is the most important figure in a child's life and can determine its whole future.
The majority of fathers are completely uninvolved in the child's life they don't even know basic info about them like who is their doctor or what their grade is. If anything fathers ruin children because they often molest them and beat them. Males are completely worthless parasitic beings and everyone is better off without them in their lives.

No. 7294

my baby sister. but she's coming back around slowly I think. I will never forgive my parents for comparing us growing up. I'm much older than her (9 years), and they would use me as a model for her to mimic which was just inhumane. I wasn't aware of the extent since I went to college already when she was only 9 years old. She also dealt with body image issues, and was a little chubby in her middle school years. She started dying her hair in high school and I noticed "they/them" in her instagram bio last year.

I took her out on a girl's vaca/trip not too long ago to just talk these things out without attacking her or anything, but after really thinking about what my parents did to her, I can see why she fell into the troon movement because she essentially was made to think she "failed" at being a girl. She rationalized that she can't beI know a lot of people are going to get mad at me for saying this, since it does funnel back into male centered beauty standards, but I did take her out to get her hair/makeup done just to make her feel a bit better. It doesn't get to the root of the problem, but sometimes interim solutions are helpful. She was beaming, she felt so cute. I've been checking her instagram and I noticed the pronouns are gone so I'm going to say it's a step in the right direction. But she also wasn't very responsive when I asked questions like "how do you not feel like a girl? what does feeling like a girl feel like?"

I want her to be in my life for a long time, but i can't bare to imagine if she transitions.

I have been noticing that so many of the girls that got into this movement are youngest children or at least the youngest daughter. Something to really think about. Talk to her, as it awkward as it is, it's never too late. I wish you luck.

No. 7343

I lost two middle school BFFs who became TIFs (FTM and NB). The FTM one is way deeper into transition, she began using male name and I don’t know if she changed it legally but last time I looked her up, she even uses a different male name than when I knew her.
The second one probably doesn’t post much about being a TIF anymore and she got some normie boyfriend but became very irritating anyway. Even though they were both important to me, I finally realized parting with them was better for me.

There’s some distant family member, a girl whom I never met. She’s a teenager and I knew her family lived in Ireland, can’t remember if they’re still are there. I heard from someone else she’s becoming a TIF and wants mastectomy.

No. 7397

Let her know that most women do this and it doesnt make them any less of a woman…

No. 7398

Please talk to him. The most you can do as a mother is try your best, but do not blame yourself. Outside influences are really bad, but i believe in you. Your words and understanding will mean a lot. Listen to him and try to determine where the source is coming from. He's most likely gay but scared to come out.

No. 7479

Thanks anon but he won't speak to me anymore. Him being gay was never a secret or even a problem. I asked him to explain so I could understand, but he was so patronising and aggressive, talking down to me like I didn't know anything about being a woman. His personality changed for the worst so suddenly. After that his hostility got worse and worse and he left one day simply because of a trivial argument about unrelated things. His school counsellor got him a social worker and a place to live with other teenagers and said that privacy laws mean I have no right to know where he is. I can't even tell anyone for the shame of it so every time they ask after him I make something up.

I can only hope that he doesn't go any further. I probably should just stop reading about this stuff because there's not anything I can do anymore and imagining the worst isn't helpful. I knew I was mediocre as a parent but I never imagined I'd fail this badly. I was too young and everything was left up to me and I choked.

No. 7640

someone i knew from high school.
He was a miserable, ugly, smelly and just an outright awful and mentally unwell individual before he trooned out, and to the surprise of nobody all of those traits have magnified tenfold, except now he's become a sexual predator and he's tried to assault me more than once.

it'd gotten to the point where i couldn't see my high school friends until i came out about it. I genuinely didn't feel safe being in the same space as him.

I have a few troons in my main friend group now, they're mostly harmless but my GOD they have absolutely no sense as to when to shut the fuck up. The constant barrage of oversharing and """deep""" conversations in the group chat is annoying. They're vulgar and really over-political and just hard to talk to.

I am so fucking sick of hearing them reducing their view of "womanhood" to high heels, makeup and degenerate fetishes. I am so sick of going to parties and seeing ugly men in shit makeup prance around and act like anime girls. I am so, so fucking sick of it.

I am sick of being around pornsick people who make their personality what they jerk off to. I'm sick of the LARPing, all of it. it's stomach churning.

No. 7641

A lot of men troon out due to a lack of masculine father figures or hating women (heard both these points from experience of knowing these sorts of people) do your best to be present, please spend time with him and help him have more childhood memories, go hiking, fishing, go to the arcade, play games together etc etc

No. 7642

Its coming from a source online (games, discord, online chats etc) or at school. Ban him from the internet for a while or change schools. Sounds drastic but if you want to save your son then that is all you can do.

No. 7643

Stop being around these people. Simple solution.
There are women out there who are normal and have normal friendship groups, stop pushing yourself to do this because of nostalgia.

No. 7644

Such is the life of a boymom. What will you do when the inevitable rape accusation comes up?

No. 7645

My childhood friend and first girlfriend, and I feel responsible because I introduced her to the LGBT sphere when we were 11, both "in love" with each other but haven't yet realised. It was just a childish crush. I was the first one who fully outed myself as a lesbian and she soon followed, then she asked me out and we were girlfriends for a few years. Then puberty hit and she got really into all the gender bullshit. She broke up with me because she started really considering transition as she told me years later, but it was probably also because I never truly treated her like a girlfriend, more like a friend because I was too shy to show affection. I reached out to her recently, asked how she's doing now. And suprise suprise, she's fully trans. I shouldn't feel guilty, but I believe that if I hadn't exposed her to the gay gender cult when we were kids she might've never even considered transitioning.
My second girlfriend turned tranny was my highschool best friend for two years, and my reason for peaking. So I guess I should thank her, in a way. She mentally deteriorated because of her poor family situation. A really crazy bpd type, twitterfag with self diagnosed adhd and autism. She is trans/nonbinary now. On twitter asks people to refer to her in angel/angelself pronouns and talks about autismgender(?). Me and my friend cut all contact with her. She's a druggie art student now.

No. 7649

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women in my nerdy internet hobby aren't exactly trooning out but they are guzzling the gendie kool-aid; the avalanche slide from she/her to she/they to "any pronouns! uwu!" or like… she/he is something is frustrating to watch. i know that doesn't mean they're trans and i'm fairly certain it's to be trendy and fit in with their friends but god it pisses me off so bad. especially when they're called a woman & they go "ummm i'm not a woman though tehe? i'm she/he look at my pronoun roles"

No. 7743

A girl I went to college with trooned out about 7 years ago. She was always out as a lesbian, and I might've been guilty to gaybaiting her sometimes when I drank too much, but I don't know, I guess I got flirty with anyone who would allow me. This was ten years ago and I was younger. Anyway, she was always so sweet and shy and could take a good joke and be silly when needed. I didn't know her super well, I can only recall as many times on one hand hanging out together, but I guess she felt close enough to me to tell me she was molested when she was younger. I had never had anyone admit anything like that to me so I just felt so bad for her. She ended up moving away across the country, I still had her as a Facebook friend and then I saw her start heading down the pipeline. About three years later she came back to town for an anime convention and she visited me at my booth. She seemed like a completely different person, so loud and annoying. I'd never seen her like that before. She seemed like she couldn't even keep up with a normal conversation, she was just blasting words into the air. It was really strange, because she used to be so much more reserved. I initially wrote it off as maybe she gained some confidence, but now, years later I think she's just going full speed ahead in her own delusions. It's been around 7 years since she started transitioning, she cut off her boobs, her hair is gone and she has the worst pubey sliver of manbeard I've ever seen. I haven't really spoken to her deeply in years but she just used to be so cute and kind and I'm just so sad seeing what she's become.

No. 7793

I used to have a close guy friend growing up that was always a bit insecure because he was short and skinny, but despite that always seemed pretty secure in his identity. A pretty much standard, typical dude. Once he entered university he started to get increasingly pretentious, writing long texts on facebook about how we as society should be more accepting towards each other etc, light mode virtue signaling. Shit you knew he didn't 100% believe in when you talked to him irl. When we were around 25 he started cosplaying and soon after he started hanging out with a group of gender specials which got his pretentious ass in overdrive and each of his outbursts online were more performative woke than the other with comments full of genderspecials agreeing with him to so even questioning his weird rhetorics would end up getting you dog piled by his retarded fans. One day he suddenly drops he's a "demi girl" and a year later he troons out. All of us that knew him for years were in complete disbelief because it was so out of character for him despite his woke online persona. I finally deleted him off all my friend lists when he made a post on international women's day about how it is a privilege for us to have periods.

No. 9532

Sage because so far she's not actually trooning out (thank god), it's more so that I'm losing her to the tra social contagion.

My best friend came out recently, which I don't have an issue with at all, even though I think she chose a label that sounds a little extra kweer. The problem is she's in a situationship with an enby and is drinking all the TQ+ kool-aid. You can clearly see that this girl she's hanging around is influencing her views. It's getting in the way of spending time with her because now she's always bringing up pronouns. When we have conversations, she'll stop to correct herself when saying "women" and clunkily replace it with crappy jargon like "feminine-presenting" or "identifies as female". I can't help but wonder if the themby she's sleeping with chastised her for not using inclusive enough language before because you almost get the sense she's walking on eggshells around the topic of gender. She's also done a few things that are really out of character for her. Naturally, I have worries she's going through a self-destructive, rebellious phase and losing her sense of self or something. My worst fear is she'll try to change her gender identity and ultimately seek medical transition.

I don't think I'll ever tell her I'm a terf unless she eventually peaks on her own. I don't even want to chance risking our friendship, it's just not worth it. Sadly, I can already feel us drifting apart all the same. She's changed so much I hardly recognize her. I can't even imagine how everyone else on this thread feels. Any tips? I'm open to suggestions.

No. 9619

Try telling her she doesn't have to censor herself around you (or normal people) and that the word "woman" isn't a bad word to be avoided.

No. 9646

Thanks for reading and responding. That's a good suggestion. I'm hoping it will get the ball moving in the right direction because I don't have the patience to listen to convos consisting of "I think that person identifies as nonbinary now actually".

No. 9861

That's sad to hear. I think I've read something like ~80% of TiFs are SA survivors and a large portion of that is CSA survivors. I wish there was a way to get these women the proper therapy to help them.

No. 9904

My brother in law. He dropped out of college and lives with his parents. My husband is 6 years older than him and never really had a close relationship. When we got married he was estranged from his family and I urged him to reconnect. When he did we found out his brother was in the midst of transitioning. His brother just seems really autistic. He is mute by choice and just stays in his room. His mother fell for the woowoo and constantly talks to us about it as if trying to convince herself it's ok he is like this. I recently found out he had a traumatic brain injury as a baby, so that might be why.

No. 11999

I miss my ex boyfriend who trooned out. It’s entirely nostalgia but there was a period where we were so happy and I miss that. It hurts knowing that I’ll never be able to just talk to him normally again and hang out and have laughs because he’s so deep in the troon cult

No. 12003

A friend recently came out as enby in the most condescending way possible - dropping into our friend group chat, where everyone else is a woman and not in denial about it, and saying that cis women were boring vapid normies and she’s too interesting to be one. We’re all in our 30s and I can’t believe she didn’t grow out of the NLOG phase a couple decades ago.

No. 12014

most straight men who troon out do so because of porn addictions. its really telling that you would be more okay if youre ex kept his degeneracy hidden instead of showing it. He was still the same person before trooning out.

No. 12018

>Girl I knew in high school wanted to be an animator; her art kind of sucked but she drew lots and seeked out critique/advice
>Starts hanging out in furry communities for commissions in her early 20s
>Suddenly becomes a 'he/they nonbinary pansexual.'
>Her already subpar art stagnates even further as she turns into a thin-skinned narc who stops accepting critique of any kind
>Abandons whatever career/life plans she had to draw furry porn while constantly bitching about having to work shitty minimum wage jobs
>Marries another fatass fakeboi to pretend live out their yaoi gayboi fantasies
>Said wife(also a furry) is a twitter edgelord with equally shitty art
>Constantly e-begs online 'PAY OUR RENT' 'BUY US PIZZA' etc.
>Never finish commissions on time because 'muh mental health' then wonder why nobody wants to commission her.
>In her 30s now with no signs of growing up or improving her life

It's amazing how she fucked up her life buying into this furry fakeboi shit. Sad because she used to be a nice, cool person before. It really is a social contagion.

No. 12025

Yikes. Usually they just imply it, instead of outright saying it

No. 12033

She outright said it and told us we were lame for not having interesting genders, kek, and then she got mad and said she was kidding and she needed our support when nobody responded and another friend politely changed the subject. We've been through a lot together and I don't think I'll ever stop being her friend, but she's always been pretty volatile and struggled a lot with mental health.

No. 12053

this happened to me too. i feel for you. i'll never forget the first time it came up. we were literally having phone sex and he usually liked being a bit on the submissive side. suddenly stopped and asked "anon… am i trans?". my stomach genuinely dropped

No. 12059

I would have given her a piece of my mind about her backwards dumbass sexist internalized misogyny.You can't start shit and expect to be coddled lmao
Or I would troll her by having literally everyone else in the group copy her and come out as an obnoxious enby at the same time, copying her words and mannerisms to the best of your abilities kek it would be so funny

No. 12076

My best friend from high school got a trans girlfriend and then trooned out himself. Would NOT have seen it coming. When I talked to him he sounded severely severely depressed. He never used to be even close to that depressed. Now instead of just smoking pot he takes fentanyl. Any day now he'll overdose. There's no way we could talk about it though. He's in a different world from mine now. We drifted apart a long time ago. It's just really saddening because I really don't want him to overdose but I know he wouldn't listen to me.

No. 12104

I think my ex-best friend’s boyfriend is going to troon out. Our friendship fizzled out because I was in love with her and she was kind of open to it, but it had to include the moid. I tried, but I was just sort of repulsed by him and my attraction to her didn’t supersede that. She did me a little dirty and we’re not in each other’s lives anymore, but we still have each other on social media and I still care about her.

I think he’s going to troon because:

1) he already goes by they/them, and wants his parents to seriously respect his ~non-binary identity~ even though he’s almost 30

2) thinks he’s not unmistakably male despite being 6’5” and 250+ pounds

3) he’s really sensitive and he doesn’t get along with other men easily, which is the biggest reason I think he’s going to troon. He’s autistic, and there’s just some sort of disconnect with him and other males and he prefers to hang out with women. When we’ve been drunk together he used to talk about that he’s been jealous of female friendships and his girlfriend is definitely a girl’s girl.

Ironically, he used to bully a socially awkward girl, who didn’t have her own close female friendships, he was roommates with lmao.

4) he just quit his job that was a 100% male staff (where he hired a troon and thought that was diversity) because the guys wouldn’t respect his authority. It was a really good job in a niche creative field and now he’s unemployed.

5) he’s susceptible to social contagion and now he’s posting artwork he’s drawn of men in high heels

Will report back if he actually troons out. On one hand I’ll feel bad for ex-best friend, but on the other hand, I hope it gives her the kick in the ass to get out of this co-dependent relationship that’s holding her back

No. 12281

Years ago I went out with a guy who recently came out as trans on social media. He's a hairy 6' tall dude and chose a name very obviously shared with an important female historical figure. He was also an alcoholic comedy bro who got let go for sexually harassing a woman at work. Now he has gynecomastia and an anime pfp. I peak every time I remember my own dating history and sometimes I wish I could go back in time and cuff myself.

No. 13903

I go on a hiatus for like a year and an old friend of mine I met through tumblr just suddenly trooned out. He was a GNC bi male. I honestly should have seen it coming due to his obsession with yuri/lesbian shipping. Now this mf has just decided he is a woman. I have been trying to pinpoint when he decided to troon out, but something tells me another troon groomed him in a separate discord server. Now he calls himself a thot and some other dumb shit.

No. 13911

Ugh it’s impossible to avoid on that platform. I lost my favorite tumblr mutual bc I think he’s trooning out too and somehow discovered I’m crypto. Another who never posted about being trans in the past suddenly started to so I have to be careful how I post. Ik i shouldn’t care but I kind of consider them my friends and it’s a little sad to lose them.

No. 13939

my major friend group had a troon out happened last month and now invited one of their “friends” into our discord and is clearly trying to hook them up with another person in my friend group and it obvious that he’s not interested but they’re being so desperate it’s not even funny. I don’t know how long before drama about someone being transphobic arises and kills this group. It’s a shame since I’ve been with them for years and this is how it’ll die

No. 13969

Old classmate of mine. I went to a pretty nutty Christian high school growing up. He was the bible class darling. He went to a christian university, majored in greek and theology, got married and had a kid while in uni, was a youth pastor - basically lived a typical southern white christian life. But then on social media.. you could tell he was slowly physically changing, i knew it was coming. Then he announced his divorce and that he's trans and been trooning out since.
Crazy part is that I used debate/argue this moid in high school on woman's rights, abortion, feminism, etc and I was labeled the evil securalist. Now he's a "proud mom" and typical edgy atheist feminist tranny now trying to live out all the feminime things he "missed out" on as a teen. No idea why he trooned out, lived THE most normie life, unless the extreme religious shit messed with his head.

No. 14187

Haven't been in touch with a friend from high school for probably 7 years since he moved to another school. He's a tall skinny average nerd-looking guy with glasses and short wavy hair. We were both shy introverts but we got along fine and became friends after sharing similar interests like drawing, video games, cartoons, memes, etc. Grew a crush on him over a year and slipped a confession note into his bag but later rejects me during our game in a Pokemon battle. We were still friends after that though it was pretty akward thinking about it. The first signs I've seen him with this troon ideology was when he made an approval of "Mettaton being trans" and saw his Mii with bedroom eyes and eyelashes on the 3DS friends list. Can't say for sure, but he might've trooned himself out since I followed his Tumblr blog ever since I shared mines back in high school and saw "she/them" pronouns on his description and reblogs trans/gendie bs. I was surprised that he also reblogs anime stuff and Guilty Gear knowing that he has no interest in them from what I remebered and he's not even a coomer either. Looking back, I think that my confession might've pushed him further into this troon ideology.

No. 14193

why would a confession of attraction toward him make him leap into being trans?

No. 14257

Don't know but it could be a possibility since he shows no romantic interest and might be uncomfortable with it. I know he was already on the troon ideology but he never spoke up about it. Forgot to mention that the school we went to is an art focus high school so there's already people who are lesbian/gay/bi and maybe other gender specials.

No. 14264

A (now ex) friend of mine trooned out a few months after I confessed to being a GC (precisely because he seemed normie enough to not "cancel" me) and now he blocked me from all social media.
So sad that he doesn't know that I'm rooting for him, I hope so much that he castrate himself, get the rotten troongina and the blood clots he deserves.

No. 14322

File: 1682601144270.png (65.86 KB, 1310x452, cd.png)

nonas here make the mistake of thinking that agp is something you develop from watching too much porn, which is why you end up confused as to why normies who have it all transition. The truth is agp can happen to any type of male, and they usually have it from a very young age. Basically if a male thinks the idea of having a vagina and breasts is intensely sexually arousing, even if they only develop this fetish later, they are very likely to develop dysphoria and want to get the chop. Your classmate likely fantasized about being sissy feminized behind closed doors for years.

A normal looking guy I followed on Tumblr suddenly came out as trans and had a vtuber avatar with enormous boobs. He used to use a female name for some of his works so I wasn't too surprised. But it's always a shock to find out some guy you thought was normal had intense sexual fantasies of becoming a woman and having giant tits.

If you want to learn more about agp and spot the warning signs, I really recommend 'Men trapped in men's bodies' by Anne Lawrence, self-confessed agp. It's the master tome on agp and transbians. Thanks to it I've got a prediction pool going on on when one of my friends will go the way of the catears. picrel

No. 14323

The part that confuses me about AGP is why they want their fetish to be public and be their whole identity

Like, regardless of how they got the fetish for becoming a woman with giant boobs, why do they decide that the world needs to know about it? What compels them to roleplay their fetish at their boring office job?

No. 14324

Ntayrt, but it feels addictively good. Many are also unable to have sex or orgasm without AGP fantasies, so they develop gender dysphoria along with the fetish. Men do all kinds of disgustingly obsessed shit for their fetishes, like pedophiles becoming teachers or pastors to easily abuse children. This is along the same lines.

AGP men also are unconscious of, deny, and/or delude themselves into thinking it's not sexual and that they're really a woman inside (this is mentioned in The Man Who Would Be Queen). The current state of the trans movement calling AGP and Blanchard's work bigoted enables the latter. Michael Bailey faced so much shit from TRAs for his work.

No. 14325

the validation from people is part of the fetish itself i think. it makes the "experience" more realistic. also real women are women 24/7 and not only when they dress up in their bedroom so they want to be a woman 24/7, too. it's like method acting

No. 14422

I think it's a good thing that moids are ruining their own lives by trooning out. It's a shame that all these poor girls are so susceptible to the dogma, though.

No. 14847

I was uninvited to my (ex) best friends birthday party because I expressed feeling uncomfortable having an all girlfriends sleepover and she invited her TIM friend. She went off on me saying that I’m a shitty person for being a transphobe and that she doesn’t understand why I feel uncomfortable when they haven’t done anything to me. She says I’m have bias against troons for no reason, then she blocked my number. She’s telling a bunch of mutual friends that I’m hateful & that she “would think twice about being friends with a transphobe” it’s been about two months since she got close to him and being an ally is now her entire personality. Her social media posts are now mostly virtue signaling and photos of them together.

No. 14851

I'm sorry that happened to you… To be honest, if she lashed out at you in such way when you were supposed to be best friends and she is also going around shittalking you to other friends, you may have avoided a bullet right there. Even if she doesn't support radfem/gender critical views, a true friend that appreciates you would have tried to understand you or reach a common ground.
Again, I'm sorry that happened to you. Hope her shittalking doesn't affect your social life too much and your other friends have half a brain to understand that not everyone must have the same ideologies/views in order to hang out and be friends.

No. 14854

I’ve received some nasty messages from the TIM & people I thought were my friends. I started a local feminist alliance in my town and now people are turning against me because I won’t support the troonism. At least I have a few real women on my side but it seems like things will just get worse.

No. 14858

Hang in there! Nurture the relationships you have with those women, those are the ones that matter! Eventually, I hope things die down and everyone forgets about happened. Or better, they realize TIMs are gross and predatory and reach trans peak, kek. Sending you good vibes, sister…

No. 14925

Ew that's so gross of her. Hope you were able to tell your mutual friends that you were simply uncomfortable so she isn't spreading lies about what you actually said like the typically do.

Do you know the troons social media accounts? You could check for degeneracy content in accounts they follow or posts they've liked as "proof" to why you were uncomfortable in the first place. It's likely he has secret accounts for it, but he may have slipped up and follow degenerate troon friends who aren't so careful and you can find more from there. Kind of like how we know Lia Thomas has a wall full of degenerate sex toys and saved his cut off balls in a jar because his also TIM boyfriend posted pics of it.

Even though it's retarded people are scared of the word "feminist" so you might do better if you use other words or have a more specific goal (helping victims of domestic violence, victims of the gender cult, sexism).

No. 14995

Ok so I feel I just lost one of my friends, almost literally.
Let me explain: we are a group of friends, who all live in the countryside in small nation in europe (this will come back in a minute), we all came together because we used to go in the same highschool and we were all weird, videogames, anime and such. We've been all friends since the first year of highschool, so since we were around 14-15. We grew up together, we did a lot of things together and we shared a lot of ideas and hobbies. This friend in particular, let's call him Kyle, never and believe me, never showed dysphoria nor he was even interested in this shit. He wasn't the most masculine looking guy but our group is almost all made of gnc men (we range from men wearing classic goth and makeup to more catwalk fashionista ones) and gnc girls, as well other "normal" people. This thing to us was never a problem and was never a matter of gender brainrot and Kyle wasn't even the most gnc, he barely had grew his hair past the shoulders.
Covid came and I sniffed somethig but Kyle was the type to have "phases" so I let him go. He had his dj phase, his digital artist phase, his cosplayer phase…whatever. He started getting interested in makeup, sure no problem, as I said we have men who wear makeup because they like it or to hide some skin discoloration, it's fine. The pandemic kept us away for 3-4 months, locking us in our home. Kyle was the only neet among us, so he didn't have anything to do, but he started getting more nervous in the group chat…okay? We let him go, we were all nervous and unsure about what to do. By the time we finish our education, we got a job and I went out of the country for some months and my other friends were either busy with work, moving out, high education grade and such, Kyle stayed home.
I came back, Kyle starts telling me he doesn't feel right. What do you mean, I ask. I don't like my body, he replies. Keep in mind, he never expressed such discomfort and he's 25 by now. I was born in the wrong body, blablabla. Whatever Kyle, get urself a psychologist, since in our country gender shit didn't arrive (yet) we thought that was something in the same pool as eating disorders, because our country doesn't have the gendie education nor gender is important here, it was always something like "be yourself, never hurt anyone, mind your business". Nope, it's gender. He wants to wear makeup and womens clothing and don't feel weird about having a male body. Ok? I mean, weird? Why are you doing this? Next to you we have our friend Nate who gets mistaken as a girl regularly because he has soft features and wears goth attire and he doesn't care about that, he's still male.
"Nono, I want to change, I want to be a woman because I always felt weird as a man."
Sounds sudden but ok. We believed this was another phase. Until this phase was getting longer and longer. He started to control our speech and mannerism and he wanted us to consider his "triggers". I feel like I'm writing some super stereotypical novel but I'm not shitting you and this has become a surprise for a lot of us. I started getting informed online, about all of this gender shit and my heart sank but what can I do? Talk to the others who already expressed support and potentially cut them off of my life because they will call me a bigot just because I feel that getting a life changing treatment is dangerous? And that condoning circlejerk mentality is bad? In all of these years, we had our fights, our cries, our help needs, we always supported each other but also called out each other if things were wrong (I remember calling out one of my friends who started to do drugs due to the loss of his mother, we helped him getting back on his feet) but everyone started to almost ass kissing Kyle…weird?
I go back to do another period working outside the country, I fly and I fly back, Kyle gets a remote job for a banking company, I think that would distract him from this shit, nope. On my last fly back, we all decide to go out for dinner and…who's this guy…?
Kyle grew out his hair (he stopped posting selfie in the group chat) and started wearing skirts and heavy make up. His expression changed, his eyes look tired and dead. Okay ahah what do I do now?
He goes by she/her now.
The night goes smoothly, until one of us says "retard" and Kyle goes "don't say that, it's offensive."
"Kyle, what's wrong with you? You know there's a difference in between me calling myself a retard and me going around kicking actual retards(for examples downies)?"
"I don't like that word."
"You've been saying this since the last month."
"I know but then I realized it was bad."
At almost 30 you realize that that's a bad word?? No shit?
I remember Kyle throwing a hissy fit last night, telling us we don't support him (not true) that we don't respect him and his triggers (apparently somebody called him a retard in middle school), and we give him bad looks just because he dresses like a woman but we don't look at Nate at the same way despite Nate wearing women clothes. I think he's a retard because he doesn't realize that Nate has always been gnc but most importantly we don't walk on eggshells around him, Nate doesn't fucking care if we call him a retard or a "he". Nate and Kyle got into a fight, were Kyle calls Nate a larper faggot (despite him being in a relationship with a woman for years by now) and the group "breaks" because no one can't stand anymore Kyle's fits.
Kyle now has new friends, all in the lgb+t spectrum and I believe he 's smearing us online (we've seen receipts).
And I'm devastated. The friend I knew since the first year of highschool died. I look at old pictures and my brain knows he's the same person but I can't recognize him. I can't link the person in the pictures with the current one. I can't link his old voice with his new one. I can't look at our group pictures because I can name all of us except Kyle. "Kyle" is dead. One of us died in the second-to-last year of highschool so I know that feeling and that is weirdly similar. When we talk about Kyle, we refer to the old Kyle, the new one despite being all the past memories, his face and mannerism, is not…he's not Kyle but he is! It's eating my brain! This is not a phase you can't just grow out of, because you can't rever the hrt effects, you can't go back and fix the feelings of the people you've hurt with a snap of your fingers…this shit stays.
Don't tell me to ignore him, cut him off, block him, he already did that shit all by himself. I'm angry at him, sure am, because he's still smearing us one year later and telling everyone we're transphobes but a part of me is terribly sad…I lost a friend who I used to laugh a lot with and I lost him because he made his whole personality an american cult…I feel like those people who lose a family member to religious cult…He died…A friend I used to love so much died but his body still walks as if he's being possessed, it's weird and deeply unsettling. Sorry for the long post nonas, sometimes I hurt really bad but I can't express this anywhere…

No. 15000

I'm sorry, nona. Your post made me emotional, I can feel how hurt you are and I'm sorry that happened to you, really. Situations like that make you feel helpless…

No. 15005

On the bright side, the trash took itself out

No. 15243

Decided to check up on a long time internet friend since my leaving of social media, he's right in the starting stages of trooning out. Some anime/gaming con just happened and he decided to adapt some persona of a schoolgirl named after hormone treatment. All the captions of him in this persona are so obscenely sexist and focused on vanity and sex. It's so clear women are just sex objects in his porn addicted mind and he's using this persona to reflect on his subconscious views and using it as a way for him to get his own sexual frustrations out. I'm really angry and disappointed it's come to this. I really want to message him and just tell him how I feel of this whole ordeal. Just a few hours ago he said he's so glad he realized he's trans and "it doesn't feel wrong" which tbh sounds like such a cope. No normal person makes remarks about feeling "wrong" when something they do comes naturally. We've bonded over liking similar things and he's sent me a few gifts over the years. Seeing this really hits me harder than knowing I have friends being confused about gender, calling themselves they/them, and just dressing up a little more than usual. Him saying he's about to get HRT, and seeing the starting stages of it, it infuriates me.

No. 15260

Nona that’s a whole ass moid you’re replying to

No. 15285

why kek, i'm retarded, did i miss something

No. 15306

> our group is almost all made of gnc men (we range from men wearing classic goth and makeup to more catwalk fashionista ones)
That and some general expressions that I’ve seen moids use, though I suppose it could be cause anon is esl and has moid friends

No. 15311

I interpreted that as "the majority of the people in the group were male", not that the anon was one of them. "We" as in "we, as a group, have different types of men". I don't know if I make sense.
For me, the wording and expressions used didn't scream male, tbh, but I'm ESL as well, so I could be wrong, kek.

No. 15518

Why do you think I'm a moid, just because I grew up in a european country with a focus on fashion to the point people naturally adopt it, no matter if it's masculine or feminine leaning? Do you realize that the world doesn't revolve around Americanized views? In Europe this shit is not that strict.
I just have moid friends, I highlighted them because the situation happened to them. We also have masculine girls, what is your point? If we had TIF friends, the convo would be about TIFs, don't you think? What I meant is that, in our group, the men are all almost gnc, not that they're all men. We're made of equally men and women. Sorry if that wasn't clear, as I said english is not my first language so I tend to construct phrases like my native one. Do I really need to specify this, it was in the second sentence….

No. 15723

I feel like I’m losing my sister to the movement, a year ago she started using they/them pronouns and gender neutral language. We come from a Latino household so my parents have been a bit iffy about the whole thing especially my mom she’s worried and course I am too but we’re walking on eggshells with her and I rather stay silent as to not make her mad because I love them so much but I can’t take it any longer. She’s moving to our home country soon and feel she’s gonna get bullied or even worse killed for dressing in her “androgynous” style but she’s in her 30s and she gets to decide her life. It’s very sad cause she’s always struggled with body weight issues and I don’t know if this stems from her weight issues and watching too much YouTube (she’s subscribed to that troon Contrapoints). Sigh, thank you for hearing me out nonas

No. 15727

We should push the concept of "trans widows" even further. Sure, those men who leave their wives and children in the name of coom are the worst but this overshadows the bigger picture, but "trans victims" sounds really cheesy and whiny. Detransitioners are having their spaces, we should get one too.

No. 15736

My friend is on his way to trooning out and it’s all just so sad and tiresome. He’s an autistic (undiagnosed, but he’s also had woefully little therapy in his life) gay guy who grew up with evangelical Christian parents and had a pretty traumatic outing as a teenager. He wants to wear make-up and skirts, although of course he’s mostly got tragic troon fashion sense. Bizarrely, he says he’s a top, and he’s also out here trying to build up arm muscle and doing that half shaved head hairstyle. He’s over 6’ with a brow ridge you could open bottles on. Why are males like this?

No. 15834

My friend told me he’s trooning out and I’m just distancing myself slowly until he’s gone. I’m not inviting him anywhere, or talking/texting to him unless he talks first, and then I’m keeping it short. It’s a little sad because we had our good times, although he said some retarded things. Now he’s gone too far. We were friends for like, 5 years I think.

He looks a lot less greasy and homely than a lot of trannies tbh but he still has no sense of fashion whatsoever. He wore a fucking, like $5 bright orange dress with a witch hat and star stickers on his cheeks and red lipstick. It looked like shit. He’s extremely skinny and had long hair even before he trooned out but his face is so bony, pale and depressed looking with his permanent ass eyebags that there’s no way he’s going to pull anything off, ever. He’s like timothee chalamet but with an uglier face.

It’s not like he’s like, a desperate creep either. He has had like seven girlfriends. I just don’t get why he’s doing this, especially when he’s described before that he wants to be the dominant one in his relationships (hes bi). Ugh.

No. 15844

>especially when he’s described before that he wants to be the dominant one in his relationships
how does this cancel trooning out. it makes sense.

No. 16020

My trans identified cousin got her double mastectomy today. I just feel depressed because if she wants to go back,its going to be so much harder and the short term dopamine high will stop, and she'll be stuck with herself.

No. 16026

Sorry nona. Have you talked to your related parent about it? It helps having someone who is sane and know exactly where you're coming from to talk to

No. 16030

An online friend I’ve had for years recently started trooning out after leaving his wife and infant son. Many such cases

No. 16034

I can talk to my mum about since she was the one who told me. Her and my aunt had a big falling out over my cousin because my mum has been a TERF for years.

No. 16055

My 13 y/o niece came out as "queer" and is dating a TiF and they call themselves bf and gf. My sister is becoming a full blown TRA and participating in pro trans protests and rallies because of it. My niece was partially raised by my mom/her grandma who is probably the most lesbophobic person I know like she's more okay with gay men but it's lesbians who she has a deep seeded hatred for and always brings it up. My mom's biggest fear was that I was a lesbian and now her beloved grandchild more than likely is. She doesn't know yet but my niece wants to tell her. I told her I love her always no matter what, but I really want to tell her that I'm sorry and I wish she didn't have to live in a world where she feels she has to distance herself from her same-sex attraction because her grandma's love for her is conditional. I'm sorry the pressure is so strong for a young GNC girl like herself and I wish she had some good lesbian or bi role models in her life she could come to without fear. If she ever says she's trans, I have been compiling all the evidence I can for how harmful it is. My sister is quite vicious and will cut me out of her life if I do something wrong to her or her daughter so I'll have make sure to broach the topic with compassion and love if it ever comes up

No. 16114

My 21 year old cousin has been a TIM (the autistic nerdy AGP kind) for about 2 years now and yesterday he texted the family groupchat asking us to donate to the ACLU because this Pride month has been a rough month for queer people (and especially trans women!!!). A few relatives hearted his texts and said “I support/agree with you” but I doubt any of then have thought that deeply about trans issues beyond thinking trans is just next level homosexual. I didn’t say anything in the groupchat. At this point I just treat it as though my cousin joined a cult and he’s asking for donations to his church so they can go on missions to save more souls. Hopefully he’ll eventually come to his senses and detransition before cutting his dick off.

No. 16450

My older brother. If anyone has good resources on debunking the “science” behind trans I’d love to see them. He told my parents that it’s brain science and his brain thinks he should be a female. I’m going to try to avoid him for the most part, but in the case that we get into a discussion on this I want to have solid information to back up my rejection of the entire premise, beyond the innate disgust and the obvious YWNBAW. My mom said he referred to her as a cis-woman and she told him not to call her that kek. If he tries that with me he’s going to discover a side of me he doesn’t like.

No. 16496

No. 16516

I hate blogging like anyone cares but I have a pretty big history (and tbf trauma) in regards to getting "exposed" as a TERF and losing community as a result. I know I shouldn't care anymore bc anyone who's worth my friendship wouldn't drop meblah blah but I still do, for some reason. it's only a mutual on Instagram, someone I'll never meet, but my feelings are still hurt. got blocked with no warning for commenting that ftm lesbians exist because homosexuality is based on biological sex. like I wouldn't even consider her a friend bc we hardly spoke but it still hurt.

No. 16603

my friend from highschool who never showed any interest in being a woman turned around 40 and decided he is going to live as woman from now on. he knows he isn't passing so he became non binary for now, his pfp is now his shaven face and insecure look. he wants to start hormones, he was groomed by a troon he met in therapy, after initial grief and anger now i am more collected. tell me nonas if i am doing well? right now i discarded this friend, if someone was okay with becoming a troon there has to be some degenerate filth in his soul before that he decided that mentally ill troon speaks sense to him, now he ruins his marriage and friends circle and scares people on fair by wearing a dress. at this point i want him to get bottom surgery so he doesn't reproduce snd focuses on dilation and axe wound complications so maybe it will make his poor wife to leave him

No. 17761

A friend who I've known since childhood and who has always been kind of an NLOG/antifeminist recently decided she's actually a he/they nonbinary, and claims that's why she was always like that. I am a pretty tolerant person, so I just roll my eyes and keep my mouth shut, but recently she has been going on about wanting to download grindr (a gay male hookup app!) despite being female and asexual and going to gay bars to meet gay men. She also seems to have a weird obsession with gay people, like when my other friend mentioned his cousin's lesbian wedding or when I express interest in another woman, she's always like "omg I love gay people", implying she's one of us. To me, it seems like this is happening because she's a straight woman who is friends with mostly gay/bisexual people and feels like she is not special or "oppressed" enough in comparison. I'm not going to drop her because she's not a bad person, but the things she has been saying recently are making me cringe so hard, and I can't really complain about it to my other friends since they are all very liberal on board with this kind of thing.

No. 18084

Advice needed, nonas. A guy that I’m seeing is starting to talk about being non-binary. When my longest relationship ended I managed to barely escape being a transwidow, which made me wary of potential gender-special males. The current guy in question is an exception. (I posted this in a vent thread, but I should've posted it here. Apologies)

Alas, I can't help but feel for him because he's been through a lot of trauma, coming from a very conservative country with a fucked up family (actual trauma, not snowflake from a 1st world country BS). I’ve always been attracted to androgynous and GNC people; that’s what made me attracted to him in the first place. Why can’t men just be pretty men anymore? God, how I miss the days when men sported long hair and eyeliner without being ensnared by the spinny skirt quicksand.

I'm crypto, and wonder if there's any way to gently and slowly but surely make him spit out the troon pill? I think that trying to peak him with TRA atrocities/activities will sound off alarms in his head. I think the safer route consists of more obvious and palatable ideas, like showing him that being sensitive and experimenting with fashion and makeup (or lack of) doesn’t make anyone less of a man or a woman. That creating a billion more labels is just giving into and furthermore upholding gender norms; it’s far more ~stunning and brave~ to stand your ground as a man that simply enjoys self-expression; anyone can do anything; etc. We're still very young (20), so I try to hold onto hope. Any suggestions? Similar experiences or success stories? Appreciate you all.

No. 18102

Honestly there are two ways this could go, in my experience. Either he gets tired of being nonbinary in a year or two, and goes back to being a man, or he goes full troon mode. Men don't seem to hang out in the nonbinary category as long as women. You mentioned he had trauma. The way I see it, if he doesn't address that trauma in anyways, I think he will only get worse and probably take the full troon route. Now, maybe you could black pill him, but he would have to have full trust in you and idk what your relationship is like. It would also be a problem of there is another tranny grooming him to 'crack his egg' or whatever it is that they say. If he has other trans people feeding him bullshit, the only true advice I can give you is to cut your losses now. I know it sucks as I used to really be into gender nonconforming fashion too, but it honestly is not worth the fight.

No. 18103

It’s hard nonna, especially if he’s in TRA circles. Ultimately, you have to come with terms that there’s a possibility you won’t be able to change his mind or break him out of it. And you have to think, do you want to spend so much time and effort trying to do so, potentially hurting your own heart and feeling disappointed and betrayed when he doesn’t change his mind? All you can really do is tell someone what you think and it’s up to them to decide what to do with it.
But if it’s only a social contagion, that will be easier than if he has physical dysphoria symptoms or deep body hatred. I agree that what you are saying is a safer route and is something people should be aware of anyway. You could maybe try to show him feminine/sensitive men that he could look up to and celebrate men who do that. Say that you admire men who break the mold and are confident despite patriarchy or society trying to turn them into macho creeps. Look for gender nonconforming men in arts/music/fashion. Definitely emphasize that people who aren’t afraid to be themselves but are still proud of their sex despite what society tells them are really cool and admirable.
Since you say he has a lot of trauma and comes from a conservative background, he probably has very rigid and painful associations with what a man should be. My brother has also recently said something about being non-binary or rather “just not a man” and he specifically referenced our father being a violent alcoholic and how he doesn’t know how to be a man because that’s the only image of a man he has. He also has a bunch of online autistic male friends that trooned out and have DID or whatever bullshit, so I know he’s been absorbing that shit from them. I told him point blank to his face he was being retarded and I told him how that was just gender roles and there’s so many other kinds of men to look up to, and I referenced my own ex-enby past for why I thought it was dumb lol. I have no idea if it got through to him and my brother is deep in other retarded endeavors that he needs a lot of therapy to get out of, so I’m sorry I can’t tell you if it was successful or not. But I do think the guy you’re seeing is probably similar in that regard, that he doesn’t want to be like the violent men who have hurt him so he wants to escape that image of manhood.
If you recommend therapy, see if you can find some that aren’t affirming because a lot of modern therapists will push him down the pipeline and closer towards trooning. I know there’s a network of non affirming therapists but I can’t remember the name right now. Maybe genspect? Detrans communities might be able to give you some suggestions.
You are still very young nonnie, and I think it’s important to remember that you have your whole life and a plethora of other potential relationships ahead of you. You can tell this man gently what you think, try to point him towards gnc/sensitive/feminine male role models, support him through his trauma but ultimately, you are only ever in control of your own actions and thoughts. You can never force someone to change their mind. And especially in terms of peaking someone involved with the trans community and leaning into a trans identity. I was “non-binary” for ten years and it took me 3 years of that to come to terms with wanting to detransition and admit that I was seeing so much wrong around me, that I had never agreed with or that had always made me uncomfortable. But I was scared of facing myself and my thoughts because I was scared of what it might mean about me, all the trauma I’d have to work through, and if other people would judge me. I’m crypto now and I also struggle with finding ways to speak out against the trans community. If he’s going to peak, it will be done on his own terms. So rather than think deeply about if you can change him, think deeply about how much time and effort you want to invest in him and the potential pain it could cause you and if you’re willing to let him go. Put yourself first nonnie, and good luck.

No. 18128

Stop dating traumatized men, go seej therapy because women who date traumatized men like you do usually have our own issues and we think we can fix them by attempting to better someone. I know because I'm like you. Please don't do this to yourself

No. 18309

I havent been talking to my friend for a few months now ever since he’s decided to troon out and I didn’t feel anything at first, but I have to admit that I miss him. Obviously what he’s doing to himself is horrible but he was still my friend. I sort of want to try to talk to him again and just try to pretend he isn’t falling for this bullshit, but I won’t be able to make a valid excuse as to why I’ve been ghosting him. I don’t want my reputation to be destroyed.

No. 18947

Venting here finally after a year of lurking: so many friends and acquaintances of mine have trooned out. I have put some distance between me and them, but still cryptoing around because I noticed that I have very hard time detaching myself from the circles completely. If I did so, I'd fall very hard into depression because I am, after all, a social animal too and I don't know when I'd finally get myself out from such slump if not at all. Sucks a lot to have grown to work in creative fields that have been bombarded with genderspecial cult plague. If I could turn myself into some stereotypical normie marketing or finances person or something, and start everything anew, I'd gladly do so, but I'm afraid that my brain cannot do the plasticity magic fast enough for such in time of the life I still have left in this world. So what am I left with besides waiting for this madness to pass at some point? Sit and watch my friends and acquaintances who inject their bodies with wrong hormones and wait to see how their bodies look feeling worse every another year, how they are mentally feeling worse after the initial "trans joy" time despite continuing to repeat the mantras. Tq movement really wrecks up the people. I'm quite wary of men and the only man I've been comfortable around with, he had such soft kindness that I admired for him having, and then he ended up identifying as nonbinary and now walks around wearing the most hideous clothing combinations with very bright hair. I have decided to see it as tragicomic just to hold my sanity because otherwise I'd cry for him also having fallen to escape the manhood as gnc every time I see him now. With TIFs they clearly have wanted to escape the view they have on womanhood as well, and most of the transitioned ones have come from very conservative, sexist, abusive and even religious cult conditions. I'm so sorry the world around you let you down, didn't let you be gnc safely and proudly, and made you hate the body and sex you were born into.
I could say that for the ones using hormones it feels like watching a very slowly but surely happening train wreck, but perhaps more like seeing a cancer patient and mentally readying myself for the worst case scenario of it. I feel so sad for them. Some of the TIFs I know have been so fun and nice people with whom I have loved to spend time with and I'd wish I could continue to do so (apart the tq shit they spout at times, I'm so tired and disappointed whenever that happens), but also so many of them have distanced themselves of me by now because I never followed them with my dreamt nonbinary transitioning aka tit cutting and small amount of testos for lower voice (LOL), meaning I turned out to be the boring "cis normie" after all. They are so focused on their transness and hanging out with the other "cool" trans, nb, and queer poly people. I think it's not just sad, but also disappointing, frustrating and awful in all its messy idioticy. I really wish I could detach myself, but they are such integrated part of the circles I live in, I have to eat my need to scream of grief and just crypto. At least thank lolcow for existing, even if I don't really have the courage to interact here.

No. 19003

Welcome anon, feel free to keep lurking. Maybe instead of leaving those friends you can make other new friends that aren't as into the trans thing? Or even talk to your family about it, I peaked my mom and it's been nice venting to her.
The trans trend won't last forever, these people will eventaully get tired of it even if it's really sad to watch now.

No. 19328

Literally exact same experience. It’s all so tiresome. I’m the only “tomboy” left in my friend group from high school cuz everyone else trooned out, and every new woman I meet is either “hentai is so cool uwu” + gendie weeb tier or she/they “I experience gender more than a regular woman does” + is obsessed with makeup and a libfem

No. 19438

My niece, she got a vr headset from her aunt and less than a year later she is "ftm"

No. 19530

>video games made my son a faggot!
>vr headset made my niece a tranny!
>reeeeeeeee the frogs are gay
it wasn't the headset, anon. you sound like 60 year old.

No. 19534

NTA but I think what nonna is trying to say is that going into games like vrchat allowed her niece to be groomed into thinking she’s a troon

No. 19537

Tell her parents to monitor her online activity if you can, I hope she's not getting groomed or tricked by adults. I see a lot of unstable adults of either gender who try to reach out to kids/teens on tranny adjectant sites.

No. 19573

I miss my brother, anons. We used to be so close, we could tell each other anything and especially as we got onto adulthood we'd really started bonding. Near the start of Covid however, my brother started dating a TiM. I was pretty surprised, but neither of us are straight and at the time I was a bit of a handmaiden so I didn't put much into it. But a year or so after, suddenly he confesses he's actually trans, he's felt this way his whole life, and he's started taking hormones. It was so fast that none of our family, including me, really had time to process it. I still cant. He'd never shown an inkling of this before. I hate it anons, so much, and along with the loss I feel from the complete dissolution of our relationship, I just feel disgust. I'm so uncomfortable with him now.
It all feels like a mockery and I'm forced to watch him play dress-up while I try to pretend I'm fine with it all. It hurts to see my brother try so hard to act like a woman; I cringe every time he coughs because he tries to make it sound high-pitched and "girly", and he coughs often because of the strain of pitching his voice. I notice every time it drops when he forgets. I can't stand how he dresses now, always wearing skirts and ill-fitting tops. I've always been pretty fashionable, and have dressed "alternatively" my whole life. Now I can tell he's trying to imitate me, going through this "goth" phase wearing all black, with poorly dyed hair and badly done eyeliner. He's even tried to tell me about women's fashion - what fits women's bodies best, dressing for your shape, trying to give me advice like this isn't the world I grew up in.
There is something painful too, recognizing how quickly my attitude has changed towards him. I used to be so helpful and patient - I'd dye his hair for him, talk to him about my interest in makeup and clothes. But now he tries to get my help with those same things and I just… can't. I can't anons, it makes me cringe, and something about it makes me mad. I spent my whole life learning these things, watching tutorials, practicing, fucking up, improving. And something in me now is disgusted to be asked to help him now - you want to be a woman so bad, do what all women did and learn how to do it yourself.
It just hurts. I hate feeling this way towards him, but I can't help it. I see how uncomfortable my parents are around him. I notice how differently I treat him, and it all hurts. I just want my brother back.

No. 19576

Now tell him all that.

No. 19578

I wish I could, I know there are some brave nonas here with similar experiences who have done so at the cost of cutting themselves off from their family - I just can't. I don't want to cause a rift while my folks are getting up there in age and have been dealing with all of… this, and I know it would. They're trying to be as accepting as they can be, though they're equally as uncomfortable and I've been letting them know it's alright for all of us to be.

No. 19580

>cause a rift
Anon… He's the one who caused the rift.
At least tell him he shouldn't copy your style because the skin walking makes you uncomfortable.

No. 19649

I started dating my ex in 2014 when I was 15 and he was close to turning 16. He was really funny and we had alot in common. I fell madly inlove with him and that year meant alot to me. Its worth noting that in 2014, GamerGate had just started and my ex was a white teenage boy so of course he was an anti-sjw. I remember he had a folder on his phone of stuff he found on 4chan which included- We Wuz Kangz memes, anti-feminist memes, gore, hentai/porn and fluffy pony torture pictures. I was too dumb to see this as a red flag but still felt a bit uncomfortable

About 7 months prior to dating him, I was in a relationship with a boy who sexual assaulted me a couple of times. The most traumatizing moment was when he put me in a headlock in the basement of my highschool, dragged me to the ground and groped me until my breasts were bruised up. My ex was the first person i had ever told and he was furious. I didnt want it to become a big deal but he went against my wishes and told our entire school. This made me drop out and stay away from public school until 2019.

During my recovery from my trauma, I discovered radical femimism through tumblr. Dworkin became an icon for me and radical feminist theory greatly changed how i viewed my situation. This was 2016 which was the "edgy filthyfrank pepe anti-sjw" era and despite the fact that he was a white teenage boy, he was supportive of me, claimed to support women and even became anti porn.

He got really into breadtube in 2018. I was 19 and he was 20. I was openly gender-critical and he was ambivalent up until this point.
His favorites were Contrapoints, Philosophytube and HBomberGuy. This was around the time that i started using Lolcow and Kiwifarms so i read up about these guy, and i was pretty much disappointed in the fact that my boyfriend who says he hates misogyny and supports me, was watching these men with misogynistic pasts

He started using the terminology. He called me a Terf and even at one point he called me a fascist. He believed that the Vancouver Rape Relief vandalism was staged. He believed that women weponized their trauma against troons. I remember one time he slapped me across the face for being "transphobic"

His breadtube obsession got so bad at the end of that year and he broke up with me after I drunkenly said to him that ContraPoints looks like Junji Ito's Fuchi while we were at a party. He dumped me and left which broke my heart because at that point we had been together for about 4 years. Some really fucked shit happened afterwards which is difficult to get into but I got over it after a few months.

We got back together in spring 2019. Things were actually great and we made a deal to not talk about trans issues. I was back in school, working towards getting my high school diploma and i was also doing therapy for my trauma. He wasnt working but was helping his mom at his home.

Then the pandemic hit. I dont remember the exact month this happened, but he came out as Nonbinary and Bisexual. I felt weird about it because he put absolutely no effort into being gender non-conforming and he had never told me about attraction to men. He wanted to change his name (named himself after one of my squishmallow), used he pronouns in public and they in private. It was also depressing cuz i felt like i finally lost him

He became even more terminally online due to not working. He started listening to Chapo Trap House, browse R/Antiwork, and was considering subbing to breadtube patreons. I told him if he did that while not working, i would leave which ended up causing a fight. He believed that Christmas, Birthdays and Valentines Day were social constructs and refused to shit with me on those days. He also stopped going on dates with me.

I did something retarded and let him move in once he started working. He brought in his giant PC and some clothes. He upgraded my bed to fit both of us. It was pretty fucking annoying sharing space with him because he was so messy. He would leave dishes on my desk, his clothes would be all over the floor and he would leave shit everywhere. He would pick fights with me constantly and barely spent time with me. He had two monitors. He would play FFXIV on one and watch youtube on the other which sucked. Imagine coming home after an 8 hour shift just to see Philosophytube's ugly british mug on a giant ass screen

He was unnecessarily rude to my friends when they would come over and would get mad when he would come home from work and they would be there. He spent all of his paychecks on computer parts and fast food. One night he screamed at me because I needed to sleep for a 7 am shift and he had an important thing to do in FFXIV and its going to be my fault if i make his friends wait. He also banned me from using Lolcow cuz it was a website for "Nazi's" lmao

There were a few moments which lead to my breaking point. I had really terrible pains in my uterus and had to get a few ultrasounds. I was told that one side of my uterus was thicker than the other and i had to take medicine for awhile. This put our sex life on a hold which he didnt pressure me over. However, one night I woke up to him shoving two fingers into me which hurt me so badly. I asked him what the fuck he was doing and he told me that he "was asleep so it wasnt assault" I was never allowed to bring this up because he would chimp out at me.

Another was when I searched his computer when he wasnt home. He was openly a furry (Judge me if you want, but i didnt see it as a problem because he claimed it wasnt sexual and his character was a bird that he made specifically to play in games) so i was expecting to see some furry stuff but i found worse. 
I found passwords to lolicon websites (one was shut down due to actual CP being posted) and links to tranny porn. I was heartbroken because my boyfriend who claimed to be anti-porn was lying to me.

I broke up with him last May. The night i dumped him he pushed my down onto the bed and screamed in my face about how much he hates me and hopes i get killed in an accident. My family thought i was too hard on him which pissed me off. They thought it was fucked up of me to dump him when he had nowhere else to go except to his abusive moms house. I didnt give a shit though

After i broke up with him, he went between trying to win me back (buying me gifts, asking me out on dates, reading about my mental illness, ACTUALLY trying to learn about my favorite things, visiting me during a hospital stay, etc) and hating me (got our entire mutual friend group against me, outted me as a "terf", sent threats to the guy i had been seeing, shit talked my family and i all over the internet, etc). I cut contact in March of this year.
If you havent been able to tell, he has an extreme victim complex. He has lost so many friends because of it. I dont think ive ever seen him admit fault. He believes that he is the victim in every situation. Sometimes i check up on his socials and see how he's been. I wrote all this because today i saw he said this:

"I was the same with an ex once, she was transphobic as fuck, gender critical, and I'm nb myself

For years I put up with her saying blatantly horrible shit about Trans people, because in my mind she was a really sweet person. It wasn't until after the relationship that I realized she was just hurting me, and I was letting myself be hurt.

There's nothing sweet or kind about it, and letting these issues lie dormant can make them fester into serious trauma, no matter small they could seem."

Im less stressed now that I dont speak to him. Its pretty depressing being around someone so self-obsessed. I warn all of you to stay away from men who had an "anti-sjw" phase because they do all this troon shit out of guilt. The nazi to tranny pipeline is real

No. 19654

A friend of mine is in a open relationship with a tif, a few days ago he was acting weird and just got himself into a crisis, saying things like ''i'm not good enough'', ''i'm not pretty enough''… and he comes out as a troon.
a man, with a job, with a ''life'' being so fucking depressed and wanting to do nothing about it, just blaming other people all the time…

No. 19657

I didn't finish reading yet but I'm already so fucking angry for you anon. What an absolute shitstain of a human being. Sounds like my ex.
> It wasn't until after the relationship that I realized she was just hurting me, and I was letting myself be hurt.
Classic DARVO move. Manifesting he does troon out, gets the rotpocket surgery, and has to live with unimaginable pain. I hope you're doing a lot better now anon.

No. 19668

Dear God nona I'm so sorry you had to go through all that. He sounds like the worst kind of shit imaginable. Men really do sexually assult women, then come out as trans and still don't see why women are against trans people and call them liars when they say troons scare them. Makes me wish I could relentlessly bully him for you lmao

Although it would be even funnier to cheer him on and push his transition further, to cause dysphoria in him that's so bad he really does chop off his dick in vain. I hope he takes hrt and grows moobs and ruins his body irreparably.

Pointless revenge plan would be to make accounts on his socials, follow all his friends and family and even accounts he follows and that follows him (at least on twitter and insta that's usually public to see). Gather all the proof of pedo content and abuse and then message them all the proof of it along with a message about how he assaulted and abused you.
Start with people who aren't close to him, like random followers of his. "Hey just wanted to let you know that person sexually abused his ex and lies about it". It will make everyone in his circles start to doubt him. Especially target any friends he has that talks about being victims of abuse themselves, they'll want to know.
If anyone brings it up you can even lie about not being a terf anymore, and say you only ever thought all trans people were bad because he as a trans person sexually assaulted you etc.

No. 19678

I'm so sorry you lived through all this, nona. He sounds horrible, but also very accurate to the breadtube/radical left moid archetype. Pretty much to a T. It's disturbing how many moids like this exist. Back in the day they'd identify as male feminists and always go on about how they used to be frat bros but are now totally secure in their masculinity and are ultra progressive. The truth is, they never 'used' to be nazis or frat bros. They still are to their very core and it shows. They put on the facade of being super woke and progressive, but behind closed doors they turn violent. They use the male privilege they claim to despise to hurt and torment you. They're some of the most disgusting people alive. I hope he gets everything he deserves.

No. 19694

I guess my female family member having a TIM as a therapist really was a concern. I don’t even know what to say anymore.

No. 19701

Of course it is, he's going to turn everything trans because that's his own obsession. His "managing" of a delusion was to dig deeper into it and pretend to be something he's not, demand everyone plays along and taking drugs/surgeries to affirm the delusions. How the fuck can a troon therapist ever help anyone when that's what they think is "helping"?

No. 19707

It’s killing me inside that his “guidance” and “help” has only made that family member more of a recluse and nervous wreck than she has ever been in her life. He won’t even refer her to a psychiatrist to get on meds for her severe anxiety that makes her break down at the thought of talking to any living being but of course being a different gender and going on hormones will solve every problem she has. And guess what, she has autism too.

No. 19771

Has anybody ever broken up with a friend over gendy stuff? My TIF friend is starting to annoy me. She's essentially turning into a reddit MRA who's been going on about how men have it "just as bad" since she knows I'm a feminist. She's a pretty typical autistic NLOG who worships men - male actors, musicians, writers etc. - but only has female friends since actual men would never be seen in public with her. Her most recent diatribe was about how a female cartoonist made a show full of "minors talking about sex" and how she "thinks she can get away with it because she's a woman". In her sheltered mind this is morally indistinguishable from men actually molesting kids. I enjoy a lot of the time we spend together but I can't take her seriously anymore since she trooned out.

As a side note: every single troon I've ever met has severe identity issues and pretends to be other ethnicities, races, religions, species even. I know this comes at no surprise to anyone but how do they not have the self awareness to see that it's just make believe?

No. 19772

>Her most recent diatribe was about how a female cartoonist made a show full of "minors talking about sex" and how she "thinks she can get away with it because she's a woman". In her sheltered mind this is morally indistinguishable from men actually molesting kids
Is she referring to big mouth? A lot of people do this with big mouth, they act like it’s no different to watching loli hentai or some shit. Have they seen the animations? It’s like they did everything possible to avoid arousing anyone by showing the ugliest faces known to humanity. Not a single person alive wanked off to big mouth and not a single person involved in production intended it to be. It’s totally fine for 6 year olds to learn about buttseggs from someone like Jeffrey Marsh or for the “teenagers” on euphoria to be having kinky sex but a bunch of hideous cartoon teenagers can’t talk about periods and boners? So Kat from euphoria can be a literal sex worker but that Mexican kid can’t be in a relationship with his pillow?

No. 19789

>Has anybody ever broken up with a friend over gendy stuff?
Yes, long vent incoming, he was a depressed lonely autist gamer and he'd occasionally mention he was sort of non-binary but he hadn't ever said he was outright trans and didn't have flags or anything. As a gamer he of course had male troon friends who he'd cape for and would sometimes bring up "JKR bad, trans women are real women as much as any other woman, terfs are bad and stupid for excluding a group of real women from their so-called-feminism".

I would pretend to be more on the dumb normie side and like I didn't really know about trans stuff and try to inject some innocent questioning "why do they always call any bad people terfs, as in radical feminist? it's not like donald trump is anywhere close to being a feminist, isn't that a bit silly to assume every bad person is a feminist?". And I also had a little bit of leverage with the strictly medical stuff because that's an interest of mine that he knows of, so I'd mention how damaging puberty blockers are and that it's terrible that they're hurting trans children. Pretty sure he just assumed he was more intelligent than me and that I was wrong and misinformed though.

At one point we argued/talked a bit online about trans stuff and he mentioned trans women belong in female prison, and I snapped a bit and tried to in the wokest way possible to explain that "male rapists pretending to be trans, but who aren't genuine transwomen, will take advantage of it and go to female prison to harm women" and he just kept defending troons and saying that rapists absolutely belong in women's prison because "women can rape too, there are already cis women rapists in there anyway". I would also say things like "the trans community says…" and he started answering things like as if he really considered himself part of the community and it clicked that he really WAS a troon at this point. Just a no effort whatsoever nonbinary troon who presents fully male and has 0 gender dysphoria. The topic of nonbinary came up too somehow, and he confessed that he doesn't believe in gender and "it's just the most convenient language right now". And I mentally snapped. This piece of shit was literally telling me rapist males belong in women's prison based on their gender which makes them "100% real women", yet he doesn't even believe in gender? Fuck you.

So I stopped talking to him for a month or so, he got really upset and didn't know why. I finally talked to him after he started being a creep and called my family on the phone to get ahold of me (he had never met or talked to them at all before). I told him that was fucking creepy and massively overstepping my boundaries, he of course defended his actions. I told him I hadn't talked to him because he didn't believe in sex-based rights and it made me uncomfortable as a woman. He got really upset that I had "put words in his mouth" and then went on to explain… that he doesn't believe in sex-based rights. After we had argued about it for a while I finally snapped and blocked him because I couldn't handle it anymore.

That was about a year ago and he's stalked me (and my family) since then. He's sent many long physical letters in which he explains that he misses us being friends and that I'm super wrong about trans stuff and that he just wants to talk more about how wrong I am about the trans stuff, that what I'm saying is harmful to poor transwomen, he's kept calling my family, turned up at my workplace when I thankfully wasn't there, turned up at my house more than once. It's exhausting.

No. 19791

Kek sounds like he considered you his girlfriend. It's frustrating that, unlike most stalkers, troons have the social leverage to turn normies against their target.

No. 19794

>Kek sounds like he considered you his girlfriend
Oh he knew I wasn't interested in dating him, but would always try to pressure and guilt me into touching him (which I never did) and would do the kind of hugs where he squeezes the chest in tighter to feel my boobs and shit. I pretended not to notice, but ew.
He once even assaulted me by groping my boobs, I just froze in fear. I don't know why I kept being friends after that. I honestly think I just wanted to pretend it never happened to me. After learning his stance on rapists I'm even more terrified about what else he's capable of.
>It's frustrating that, unlike most stalkers, troons have the social leverage to turn normies against their target.
Because I've been to his place before and know he doesn't own a printer and the letters he sent were all printed out I'm actually convinced his therapist encouraged him to write and send them to me, which is all sorts of fucked up. I know he doesn't trust his "abusive" family (I first assumed he was being truthful about it but the more he talked about it the more I doubt it since it didn't add up and his mom was always sweet and helpful and he kept being a dick to her anyway. Might be the classic troon case of claiming the family is abusive for not calling him she/her and being evil bigots or something) so he likely wouldn't have asked them to print it. And he didn't really have friends he'd meet up with irl other than me. Because I'm also an autist and the local autist therapist team is the same one we've both been to I emailed them about it. I didn't want to directly accuse them of encouraging my stalker, but since I know the whole team talks to each other about all the patients I thought sneaking it in with the message would make them bring it up at a meeting, so whomever did it (well, if they did it) would realize they're the one who accidentally made an obsessive stalker harass a scared female.

My family was also far too sympathetic towards him since I didn't give them details about him. They'd block his number for my sake but they'd tell me they feel sorry for him. I didn't want to admit he assaulted me but it still feels so shitty to have them kind of defend him when he did that to me.

Sorry for venting so much, it really helps to talk about it all lol

No. 19799

Fuck that gross piece of shit moid, I'm so sorry that you have to deal with him stalking you nonnie.

No. 19807

Thanks nona, I hope he gets tired of the stalking eventually. At least when the troon craze finally ends he might figure out what he did wrong

No. 19808

AYRT it was that Velma HBO show, but I'm surprised she hasn't gone off about BM too. She refuses to watch anything for adults, especially if it's sexual or features drugs (somehow she doesn't seem to think that exogenous testosterone is a drug)

No. 19861

Same happened to me, tranny would call and text me and try to contact me literally 100s of times a day while talking on social media about how he was doing so well in theraoy and how he was sure I was an abusive piece of shit. His friends would talk about punching me in the face for him. I still wonder if he was encouraged to do what he did to me or if he was just that delusional that he found his actions valid while lying in therapy and to his friends about how he was coping with my rejection.

No. 19868

If you're brave enough you could gather some proof of him harassing you and send it directly to those friends on social media. Especially if they're female. Like gather screenshots of him sending 100 messages in a day, any lies you can disprove, him saying violent or mean things…
Depending on what you've told that guy you can even throw in a little "Of course I totally support trans people, I just don't want to date/be friends with this person because she's mean, and so she's lying and telling everyone i'm a terf as revenge. And acting like that is the exact reason I didn't want to date/be friends with her to begin with." it's not gonna work if he has screenshots of you saying you hate troons and such though lol. And end with some "it's up to you if you still want to be friends with this predatory manipulative person, I just wanted to get the truth out there and warn you that if you ever cross her she might do the same to you and you'll have people saying they'll punch you for something you never even did".

It also helps if you have a friend/s to back you up. I'd definitely do it to support a friend.
If you choose to do it, screenshot EVERYTHING you can find about it and store it in a folder so he can't freak out and delete evidence when he sees you're starting to speak out. (or if you ever want to get a restraining order over him harassing you) Type out your message before sending it to people (I'd recommend starting with something like "Hey, I'm sending you this message because it seems you're friends with X and she's been spreading harmful lies about me". If you have ANY claim to oppression use that to your advantage (gay, any kind of poc, autism, mental disorder of any kind, jewish heritage… you can even pretend to be an enby*, and say you just didn't feel comfortable coming out before because she was clearly an unsafe person if they ask kek)

Once you're ready to send it open up all accounts you want to send it to (also don't send it from your main account, make a side account for this) in different tabs and quickly copy-paste it so they all get it around the same time. You want to prevent one friend getting it, immediately telling the troon and the troon then telling all their friends to block you because you're lying before you've even gotten to send the evidence.

*About pretending to be an enby: if you're like me and don't believe in gender ideology and that you don't have a gender… then according to their ideology that just means you're a valid agender enby person. So it's technically not even a lie to call yourself an enby. You're automatically trans just by not believing in trans ideology kek

No. 19887

Anon that sounds genuinely worrying, did you report his actions? I hope he's stopped now but if he hasn't, please go and report this

No. 20064

One of my ex friends aunts is an older lesbian, late 50s, and she’s been dating her wife since the 90s. Even after my friendship ended, I was close to the aunt because she was the first supportive woman figure I knew, and her wife was the one who taught me that it’s okay to be gnc because girls don’t need to be feminine to still be beautiful. Aunt and wife are basically my own family at this point, I love them. Even after I moved, I talk with them all the time.

For background, they have had trouble with adoption. They live in the Bible Belt and the girlfriend used to have severe mental illness, so they’ve been denied adoption since the 2000s. They’ve fostered at least 10 kids, but they never have been able to adopt any, even ones in shitty situations. In 2020, they were fostering a 2 year old girl, but were denied adoption despite her living there since she was 3 months old. The reason being that her bio family is Muslim and they didn’t want their daughter signed off to “someone who won’t raise her with her culture,” even though wife is middle eastern herself. This really fucked up aunt and wife, but especially wife. Wife really loved this baby girl and being forcibly separated broke her heart.

Wife trooned out in 2021, I’m 100% sure it’s because she feels like she needs to be a father in order to have a baby. She started off just dressing male but she then she got on hormones, and now wants top surgery. Aunt figure talks to me a lot about how awful and trapped she feels because she isn’t in love with what her wife is becoming.

The person she fell in love with was a woman. A gnc woman, but very much a woman. But this testosterone is making her super aggressive, giving her facial hair, and she stinks like hell. Even though Wife is definitely still a bio woman, she’s becoming too much for aunt to deal with. Wife gets very aggressive about troon stuff, gets super mad when she is called a lesbian (which Aunt still calls herself), and has even started cutting people off for showing concern.

Aunt feels like she’s invested too many years into the relationship to just leave. Not to mention the fact she feels as if Wife will end her own life if they break up. She’s tried therapy, therapists affirm wifes gender. She’s tried reaching out in online gay spaces, same thing. She’s asking me if she’s wrong for wanting to leave now, and I don’t know what to tell her. She’s loved this woman since before I was born. I don’t know what to tell her other than that she should leave, but I know saying that will make her defensive.

No. 20065

Oh god, I feel for her. Since psychotherapy and online gay spaces are mandatory 100% pro-troon these days, maybe the aunt should read up on what to do when a spouse joins a cult like Scientology, since transgenderism is basically a cult at this point.

If you ever read the r/qanoncasualties subreddit, people post all the time asking what to do when their spouse gets obsessed with Qanon. Obviously it's a difficult decision and each family is unique, but there comes a time when getting divorced for your own sake becomes a better choice than staying with the person who's gone crazy. It's funny, most of the posters on that subreddit would encourage leaving a spouse who got too obsessed with Qanon conspiracy stuff, yet those same posters are usually incredibly pro-troon, so those same people would likely encourage someone to stay with their spouse if they became obsessed with gender identity instead of Qanon. People fail to realize that Qanon and transgender stuff are exactly the same - both are a rabbit hole that traumatized/mentally ill people fall into because they promise a way to make sense of the world.

No. 20066


It really is. I’m sure she started the transition to cope with the fact she’s denied adoption for being a lesbian, but the cult is what killed it. She was always super masc, she would jokingly call herself the husband and talked about how she loves doing man work, like building and repairing. I’m not exactly a trans ally, but I feel like if she just changed her pronouns, cut her hair, and maybe changed her name, I could try to accept that.

But it’s what they did to her. She was never confident in herself as a woman due to her masc interests, but they got it into her head that she was never a woman and that she’s always been a man. I can 100% see how that made sense to her, all her issues are woman related, so she fell in deep. Now, with the hormones, her personality changed. And Aunt is still in love with her, shes been with her since the 90s and known her even longer, she’s quite literally losing her soulmate. Fuvk, I’m devastated about it and I’m just the girl they would take camping and drive to soccer games. I feel like I’m losing a second mom. I know it’s best to cut my losses, but I still look at this stranger and see the woman who taught me to be comfortable in my body

No. 20073

That’s terrible. I totally empathize - it’s hard to be a normal woman in the world, and even harder to be a GNC lesbian woman experiencing homophobia on top of regular misogyny. It’s taking a coward’s way out to say “nope, none of that actually applies to me because I’m not a woman, I’m a straight man.”

It’s a sad fact of life, but it’s unfortunately a common occurrence that many of us will deal with at some point, to watch a family member or loved one struggle with something and not be able to help them (because they refuse help or don’t think they have a problem). Lots of people have relatives who join “normal” cults like Scientology, or they get addicted to drugs and alcohol, or they date an abuser and refuse to leave them (or they can be like lolcow Shayna and insist on being a prostitute even though their family wants them to come home and get a normal job). I’m really not sure what your aunt can do about her troon wife, it seems like the 2 options are for them to either stay together and your aunt to be miserable because she’s married to someone delusional, or for her to cut her losses and get divorced, and hope that her (ex) wife eventually hits the equivalent of an alcoholic’s “rock bottom” - realizing that she can’t change sex, and transgenderism is illogical. Like with all cults and addictions, some people’s relatives eventually do decide they want to commit to going to rehab and sober up, while other people’s relatives end up OD’ing or remaining in the cult (or abusive relationship) until they die.

No. 20217

Close male friend of mine’s brother trooned out recently. He is huge into the metal scene and is 100% agp and has already started posting about girl cock and trans vengeance. I never really knew the brother outside of school (all three of us went to the same high school) but I’m so tired because I’m also into the local metal scene and deal with enough bullshit as is. I’m more worried that my friend will get sucked into the social contagion and also transition. They lost their dad in a car accident a few years before we met so it sounds more like a delayed trauma response and Im hopeful the tranny thing stops eventually but I’m so tired.

No. 20388

I'm sorry to hear about your friend anon and I hope your friend doesn't go down that path. It's weird that his brother trooned out but you said you didn't really interact with him so you wouldn't know if there were red flags. Big chance of course that he just looked at a lot of troon porn and got lost in the fetish like all the others. Though you say it could be a trauma reponse, why is that? Is the brother married or have a girlfriend? Is their mother still in the picture?

No. 20441

update to this post from three months ago. i met with cousin, it was good for the most part. she did try to insinuate that my mum is abusive to me because she's a terf, and she did talk about going to trans pride and her surgery. but a few weeks later, my mum visited my granny's and my aunt and cousin were there, and my cousin literally stood outside because she didn't even want to be under the same roof as my mother.

No. 20445

Kek whats up with trannies in the metal scene, especially in the black metal scene? Literally every band they losten to would mock them. I feel like every other week someone I know troons out, and its always the gangliest faggots too.

No. 20449

I did and I got called a bootlicker by him and his friends for turning to police intervention while nothing really came of it. Once because he was suicide baiting me and kept telling me he was going to die, so my school services, who I confided in, thought it best to call a wellness check on him. And once because I was afraid in my own home because of receiving messages that he was coming for me (police said they could do nothing unless he was there). The most humiliating part of all of this was that I was more of a handmaiden back then so I was not taken seriously because my effort to respect his pronouns in spite of it all was too difficult for law enforcement to understand.

No. 20451

One of my favorite podcasts, Normal Gossip, brought in someone who is pro men in women’s sports. Katie Barnes? I am so upset. I should’ve seen it coming because they had some other TiF previously and the host strikes me as hyper libfem, but god damn dude, i am just so tired of this shit.

No. 20460

I don't know why people call trans simps libfems when most if not all are Marxists.

No. 20470

That’s fine- Honestly trans simp-feminism is a good moniker. Men-centered feminist. All lives matter feminism.

No. 20756

Hello I'm
And I'm here to vent about recent updates about the situation: Kyle calls himself a lesbian and actively preys on lonely/anxious girls on dating sites. He still goes around bashing us, in an autistic way (meaning his breakdowns are very chris chan like) and then dates girls who are barely adults, meaning they're 10 years younger than him, he also admitted to prey on them because mentally ill girls are lonely and would give him a lot of attention, he suicide baits constantly on his public social medias and then after a few hours, he says he's happier than ever, I suppose because that's his way to get attention and these girls text him to not to do it out of fear. I hate this. I hate all of that. I also hate how people like me and Nate (our feminine guy friend who's just like that, he doesn't claim to be a woman, he wants to be a visual kei guy) struggled to get recognized as "normal" in our country, by proving that just because we do not conform to gender roles doesn't mean we are creeps only to get our struggle not only be appropriated by Kyle but also fucked it up again. When the gendie shit will go out of fashion, the people hurt by them will speak up saying they were groomed/abused and all that shit and the people who will suffer from it will be us. I don't want me or my friends being labelled as weirdos or groomers again because random people who wanted a crumb of attention start to dress up weird and call themselves trans and actually groom people.
Recently, a girl asked me what my pronouns were because of my short hair, I asked her "why?" "Because you have a nonbinary haircut so I don't want to be offensive"
What the fuck even is a nonbinary haircut…

No. 21225

My little sister is a TIF. I miss her so much. I should've been a better influence. I think it's all my fault, I thought I was trans as a teenager because I didn't know how to cope with womanhood and all my friends were doing it. But she saw me doing all that when she was little, I must have fucked her up. I'm so goddamn sorry. I wish I'd known better. It'll be partially my fault when she dies of a blood clot from those stupid fucking testosterone shots.
I pray one day she texts me and tells me she's detransitioming, and I hope she knows I won't be mad at her. I'd tell her that it's ok if she decides to detransition, I'd tell her that I'd be there for her when she's ready and I won't judge her, but I know it'd just blow up in my face because my entire family is captured by this genderspecial bullshit and even suggesting that she isn't actually a man or that I don't believe she will do this forever would be enough to get me ostracized. I just want my little sister back

No. 21942

File: 1704057807702.jpg (91.3 KB, 640x360, 988.JPG)

A female relative and a longtime male friend have recently come out as trannies for incomprehensible reasons! Happy New Year!

No. 24386

I sincerely hate the transgender cult. The damage the tranny bullshit has caused to female nerd circles is immense. It's caused me to lose all of my friends from high school. All of them, by the end of 2019, became some flavor of nonbinary or TIF. I knew not to stay there, or else I'd get the TERF accusations. But this just isn't a localized problem. EVERY single nerdy group I've seen has some flavor of tranny garbage poisoning it.

I've always had interests in dorky things, such as fandoms and technology and the like. To the point where I'm a computer science major and was an AP student. Trouble is, I attend classes remotely in a small town (because I can't juggle living at college with taking classes). This already gives me practically no opportunities to meet and hang out with other women my age. I would be happy just to meet other women my age period, regardless of shared interests, but they've all vanished.
I don't know what to do.
When I graduate, having my college experience be a blank slate, where my happiest memories were by myself on my computer, I'll probably strive for and get a prestigious job. It's all I'm looking forward to in life. And then maybe travel the world, but again, alone. But that might not be a bad thing, but I don't know.
Probably remote as well, because I'm too terrified of getting raped and kidnapped to leave my small town for anything other than the country.
Any potential shared interest friend groups I could've and used to have are gone. It's a weird kind of melancholy peace, because at least I don't have to cater to their draining emotionally manipulative demands. But I see other people happy and having fun with their friend groups at college, and I just wonder if there's something wrong with me when I look at my life and it's just a blank void.

No. 24387

I feel the same way. I love fantasy and I would love to have a group of like-minded friends to go to the renn fair with and play dnd with but not only am I a socially retarded autist, I also can't stand that every single nerdy friend group has a thick layer of trannyism on it. It's virtually impossible to find any female nerd friends who are not delusional misogynistic themythems who screech and virtue signal all day. If I was going to find a group I'd have to bite my tongue constantly and put up with maybe even being looked down at for "identifying as a woman" (bc to these people woman just prissy uptight karen). I see so many of these people having fun and having genuine friendships (rare these days) and it also makes me feel like there's something severely wrong with me and that I can never get that for myself

No. 24388

>I see so many of these people having fun and having genuine friendships (rare these days) and it also makes me feel like there's something severely wrong with me and that I can never get that for myself

EXACTLY. It gets me so bitter. Why do the people who send women like JK Rowling death and rape threats get to have a friend group full of people just like them with shared interests? Why do the misogynists who throw other women under the bus get to have happy social lives full of lively friends?
What's left for women like us who didn't drink the koolaid?

No. 24502

Well nonnies, I am fully losing my half sister to the trans cult. All my life I've never lived close enough to that part of my family to create a good bond with her (just short visits), but I still feel I somehow failed as a big sister. She's autistic, has no friends but 2 online, and has other mental issues. She somehow got fast tracked and cleared for a mastectomy which happens in one month. My dad told me how excited she is despite him trying to explain how major a surgery it really is. Not sure if she is on testosterone yet, but her voice is so high she will sound like that one Pierre girl from the TIF thread, maybe worse when she does go on it. I live too far away and will be disowned by my boomer parents if I say anything to try and get them to think critically about trans shit when I do go and visit or make calls. I hate this timeline so much.

No. 24601

>gay autist brother is taking estradiol

No. 24942

File: 1717455708486.jpg (79.7 KB, 660x837, WHEN WILL IT STOP.jpg)

>every single one of my girlfriends
>even the feminine ones
>even the ones i e-dated over skype
>even the girl i dated for 30 minutes on the school trip bus when i was 15

No. 25043

It's called being part of a cult kek look at any other person who relies on religion for their social life.

No. 25189

Hope I'm just looking too deep into things and my brother is NOT becoming a tim. Surely not. If he even tries I am coming out of crypto I am not calling this literal sped a "she".

No. 25250

File: 1718061354303.jpg (88.91 KB, 1080x607, tumblr_dfd016c3c9e9ee8956a44f5…)

I used to have a friend that I thought I was pretty close to, I was coworkers with her and her eventual boyfriend turned husband. They were basically the only friends of my husband and I, that we weren't related to kek. After about a year of her becoming addicted to tiktok and lib political garbage, the subject of tra stuff came up, and I was honestly a dumbass for thinking I could just explain respectfully how I feel and the evidence as to why, I basically begged her to not hate me or be mad at me even when I was as careful as possible with how I approached the subject (I regret being such a worm about it tbh) and she acted like I hurt her personally, as if I'm some child who should apologize to the poor straight white libfem girl for not parroting her tiktok echo chamber. She hasn't talked to me since, and it's been a little over a year now. The way she gets off on thinking she's morally superior has always been annoying but this is just the final point for me. I can tell she expects me to come back groveling for her friendship because she knows she is the only friend I had, she's the type that uses the silent treatment as an adult (WITH TWO KIDS LMAO). Good riddance. She raises her kids on their ipads while smoking weed all day and binge drinking all night while complaining about any surface level normie tiktok and facebook garbage while listening to the same music she liked in middle school and generally thinking she's some woke hippie who always has some excuse for not getting off her ass. I just hate that her kids (2 boys) have to deal with her projecting onto them (she thinks her 10 year old is gay, no evidence) and will only get their mothers attention when she derives amusement.

Her and I never really got along, she just wanted to drink with me and it was always so boring because she can't hold a conversation to save her life, she wants to just show me tiktoks and complain about trump, I'm always begging her to have a single critical thought or at the very least give me some personality past "heehee I still love mcr I'm still EMOOO" or "WAHHH my parents and ex husband are so awful and I'm refusing therapy I have access to but I love whining about it!" I don't usually want to trivialize someone who's dealt with shit but it's obvious she only wants to complain for the fun and validation of it. I'm losing the plot in this vent but if there's one thing I've noticed about her type, is that they are addicted to feeling like they have the moral high ground, with no actual empathy for the people they supposedly champion for. it's why throwing women and gay people under the bus is so easy for them, because they never gave a fuck. She wants to be the ally mommy to piss off her conservative baby daddy even if she makes her kid uncomfortable. She wants to feel like she's the one exposing ME to these grand ideas of equality, like girl I've been going to seminars and protests and shit like 10 years ago, I used to drink the kool aid just like you and now I'm past the ego boost and just want to genuinely help people. The way she sat with me one day and said triumphantly "I think sex workers deserve equal rights!" and the silence filled the room where she expected to either get an asspat or have me become a strawman for her to "educate" like….KEK I should have known then. Girl I was there when tumblr made that shit up for the first time.

sage for longpost/blogpost. Sorry I just can't believe she really cut off years of me kissing her ass in a single day, from a single disagreement that I wasn't even full terf about, I was just raising questions with her.

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