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File: 1527655031196.jpg (88.8 KB, 736x1103, 1505778082638.jpg)

No. 83805

How strongly do you feel about cheating? Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them? Would you forgive it to a point? Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence? How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

Have you ever cheated or been cheated on? Have you ever been with a taken person? Share your experience.

No. 83806

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
It's wrong but I know people can handle it differently especially in each situation, like I understand having an emotional breakdown if a husband of several years cheated, but if a non-serious guy you dated in high school cheated it's just silly to act as if that is a life-ruiner
>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them? Would you forgive it to a point?
I'd forgive but breakup with them, I'm not gonna go find them and stalk them and get them fired, I might even stay friends with them but distance myself until I can handle it
>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?
hell no
>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?
thots will thot, but it's his job to say no
Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?
I was cheated on by my first bf
Have you ever been with a taken person?
not that I know of but I use to talk to a guy, not in a sexual way but I ghosted him when he tried getting sexual, a few months later his wife hacked his skype and made a group chat of all the girls he was flirting with and sent pics of the divorce papers, me and the ladies ended up being great friends though

No. 83807

I don't accept cheaters and I don't date the type of guy who cheats. Cheaters are disgusting.

No. 83808

I would drop a cheater immediately. Being cheated on doesn't even make me sad, it infuriates me and it makes the cheater disgusting in my eyes.
Assuming I knew the person he cheated on me with, and that person knew he was in a relationship with me I would be very pissed at her and if I had the opportunity I would tell her what I think about women like her.

When I was a child I saw a woman getting chased down the street and beaten up by the wife of her lover, I wouldn't do that because I'm not a violent person, but she kinda deserved it imo.

No. 83809

File: 1527659392648.jpg (72.22 KB, 788x786, a higher level of woah.jpg)

I don't get angry about other people cheating. I really don't feel that strongly unless it's a close friend getting hurt or something. Cheating is an indication of a troubled person and/or troubled relationship.

There are multiple levels of cheating, but I separate it into two groups: emotional and physical. I think emotional cheating is easier for women to write off, but it tends to feel more like a betrayal akin to being physically cheated on. While physical cheating is almost impossible to overlook and is downright mean.

>Would you dump a partner immediately?

This would have been easier to answer if I were still living with my parents. When I lived with them, my finances and living situation weren't entwined with my boyfriend. If an ex caused me grief, I would just dump because my life would go on as normal literally the next day.
Now? If I dumped my boyfriend my life would be sacked overnight and only more complicated by my job, property, and debts.
I would want to dump my bf if he were a cheater. Yet I'd have to be more cautious, gradual, and reserved or else I would risk hurting myself in the process even worse. I wouldn't want to be cheated on and have a shitload of stress on top, so I'd be forced to be amicable about it until I was a safe distance.

I could never sweep cheating under the rug though. Nor could I ever truly forget.
Maybe forgive it to a point, but I would be too hurt to carry on a loving relationship with that person without being bitter and suspicious.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with?

None. I've always believed that people who place any blame on the other person are just trying to mitigate guilt from the cheater at fault. Too many times cheaters point to the other person for their bad decision, and just no. I've been on the receiving end of solicitations from male cheaters to know I never pursued them. When I'd say no, they'd cheat with whoever was the next available. Even if the other person "knows," they're often fed lies in order for the cheater to get his way ie. "Hurr my gf is a yuge bitch and we're not doing well and we'll probably break up so let's fuck." I've heard that before.
Problem is, a lot of cheaters are charismatic narcs and know exactly what to say to get people to cheat with them and then convince their partners it was their fault.

>Have you ever cheated?

Never. Unless you technically count me sleeping with someone and breaking off my already doomed relationship the next day. That decision was made before I got into bed though, would've dumped either way.

>Have you ever been cheated on?

I suspect I was once, but the relationship wasn't all that serious and I knew it wouldn't last. I was mostly with the guy to have sex and smoke weed, y'know, have fun.
I could tell he was shady. He was weird about me tagging him on social media, and once I called him and found out he was with a girl I'd never met "picking out a puppy" at a shelter. Lmao. He wasn't even upset when I ended things so what does that say, really. I can't even be mad.

>Have you ever been with a taken person?

A mister "I'm married but my wife is separated right now so it's cool" later turned "well actually we're doing better but now I'm emotionally fucked from cheating."
Ghosted his ass for his own sake, what a fucking moron.

No. 83811

I would probably forgive my partner for physical cheating because my libido is so low I'm basically asexual. I wouldn't mind it much if he got his sexual needs satisfied by someone else, though tbh I'd prefer him to talk to me about it because I'd give him permission to do it, granted it's protected and doesn't happen at our home.
Idk man maybe I just feel guilty for never wanting sex and that's why I feel like this. Emotional cheating is harder to forgive but even then I'd probably just blame myself for being emotionally unavailable most of the time.
Man I just realized that I'm a shitty gf and my bf deserves better. Neat.

No. 83812

I’ve cheated before. It’s a really shitty thing to do, and it was all on me. It was a one time thing and it never happened again. I was really young and in my second relationship ever and was extremely unhappy with myself. The guy I cheated with was lovebombing me and I let it get to me. He told me everything I wanted to hear even though he meant none of it. Really the fact that I did it and the reasons why only come down to myself and the fact that I had so little respect for my boyfriend at the time and myself that I let my insecurities get to me. Cheating is really only a reflection of the cheater and not the one who gets cheated on.

No. 83815

I've gotten to the point of almost emotionally cheating on my boyfriend. I say almost because I'd speak to guys who I knew wanted to turn it into a sexual convo, but I'd stop it from getting anywhere because I couldn't stop thinking of my boyfriend. Seeking out that kind of attention 100% came from a combination of my lack of self esteem and feeling as if he doesn't see me as a girlfriend. We've been together so long that I feel as if sometimes he sees me more as a sister. There's a lot of shit like that in our relationship, but I know that if I was a stronger person I could handle it better and not turn to shitty ways to cope.

A little while ago, I was honest with him about it and we had a conversation about it. He's trying to change what he was doing (not that anything was or is his fault. But there are certain things that he does that make me want to seek attention elsewhere) and I'm definitely catching myself before I continue shitty behaviors. Little things like joking that I need to put my makeup on to take my dog for a walk just in case or saying "I'm not talking to anyone" when I'm clearly talking to someone, I've stopped doing completely. Even when he knows I'm joking or just giving a nonchalant answer, it just feels manipulative and I become disgusted with myself.

I feel like if I flirted with the guys who flirted with me or did something physical, he'd definitely dump me and I don't blame him. Even if he didn't, I'd leave him myself because I wouldn't be able to face him. I'd be devastated if he cheated on me so knowing that I've made him feel even a drop of that kills me. I'm grateful that he was willing to work through my issues with me.

>Cheating is really only a reflection of the cheater and not the one who gets cheated on.

Absolutely this.

No. 83819

File: 1527663776229.jpeg (8.65 KB, 300x250, images (23).jpeg)

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
It's wrong but I don't mind it unless it happens to me. It may sound egoistical but it's the truth. Also, I know I'm gonna sound like a huge bitch for this but when my friends get cheated on I feel zero empathy or get some kind of satisfaction from it.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them? Would you forgive it to a point?

Absolutely. It's extremely hard for me to get into a relationship since I don't really care about sex and have low tolerance for men so to the trash he goes. I'm consider myself pretty vindictive but I wouldn't do anything, cheaters aren't worth the trouble imo.

>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?

No with a sole exception, a marriage of convenience. Guy needs to be the millionaire kind of rich and supply all my needs so I agree with it.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

pic related. None, unless they're friends/family.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated

Never cheated. Never been cheated on.

>Have you ever been with a taken person?

Not that I know of. And tbh I would if I had the balls to do it. I started liking a male friend since he opened up about his sexual preferences/world views etc but he's already taken. I've met his gf before and even tho I tried to befriend her and be nice, can't stand the girl. So basically if he came to me I'd be down for it in a heartbeat but I'd never chase him in my own initiative.

No. 83820

File: 1527663963747.jpeg (21.61 KB, 458x321, images (21).jpeg)

Shitty pic but you get the idea.

No. 83821

Very, yes, no, no, a lot on both.
I've never cheated and I've only been emotionally cheated on but no more.

I'd rather die alone than marry a hoe.

No. 83824

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
Quite strongly. It's a horrible thing to do to a person. It can cause huge emotional traumas for everyone involved.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?

No, and I hate that but I know it's the truth. if my current partner had a drunken one night stand, 'fessed up and apologized then I wouldn't leave, though I'd be incredibly hurt. I would forgive him assuming it never happened again and he made it up to me by becoming a better man and partner. A few months-long affair that he went out of his way to hide from me is different though. I'd be heartbroken, but I would leave. Deceit is the part of cheating that I can't tolerate.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

If they knew, then it's a shitty thing to do, but they're not the one with a partner. if it was a mutual friend then I would absolutely blame them to some degree, but if it was just a random unfortunate girl i wouldn't blame them, just wouldn't condone their actions.

I've never been cheated on, but my first relationship was with a manipulative son of a bitch who made sure we were never "officially" together while saying he loved me because if I wasn't his girlfriend I didn't feel like it was my place to be able to tell him whether he could sleep with other girls or not.

No. 83826

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?
Absolutely. To me, it's one of the most disrespectful things you can do to someone in a relationship. It basically says ''you're not good enough''. I personally could just not be with that person anymore, and even if, everything would feel different and forced.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

If they knew that the person was in a relationship with me, I'd blame them as well. It's fucked up and they're disgusting, but I'd be a lot more angry at my cheating S.O.

No. 83831

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
Very strongly against it in principle
>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?
Never been reaaaally in love so I can't say for sure, but I'm a very prideful person and I think I'd dump them out of spite no matter what. And I know logically if they do it once, they'll do it again.
>Would you forgive it to a point?
I would eventually if it was a one off, doesn't necessarily mean I'd stay with them or take them back. Just means I got over it.
>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?
Regular cheating as in an affair is irredeemable and I'd never forgive it
>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?
Not much unless I knew them personally. I'll think less of them as a person of course, but my issue is more that cheaters don't deserve access to vagina and girls who fuck douchebags need to love themselves.
>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on? Have you ever been with a taken person? Share your experience.
Never cheated, been cheated on twice by the same guy (lesson learned), and when I was younger I once put serious effort into tempting a guy who was on the verge of dumping his gf. I wouldn't have gone through with it if he took the bait, but it was still a shitty thing to do. He dumped her for me and then dumped me for her, which was extremely unsurprising.

No. 83832

>He dumped her for me and then dumped me for her
Lol, sitcom material

No. 83834

Kek it was actually even messier than that. My ex cheated on me and I dumped him, then the aforementioned guy dumped his gf, then my ex hooked up with that girl, then I got together with the second guy, and then he dumped me for his ex. Then my ex got with the girl he cheated with and she cheated on him so much he got erectile dysfunction from the emotional trauma. And to wrap it all up, at one point years before the 2nd guys ex cheated on him with the girl my ex cheated on me with. Hope that made sense but honestly I still came out relatively clean in that situation.

No. 83835

Oh and I forgot to mention my ex and the second guy were good friends

No. 83837

I don't get people who cheat, shows a total weakness of the character imo. Yes I've been there, catching feeling for someone else but I always recognized it as just an infatuation. I'm very content with my LTR partner and have no intentions to change anything about our relationship. When crushing on someone else, I mentally enjoy the high I get from the oxytocin until the feeling fades. I don't need a physical contact with the person, be it sex or anything else. Maybe that's why I'm so judgmental about it - it's easy for me to just enjoy the butterflies for a week or two without acting out on it, but it might be very hard for someone else.

I still think it's a weakness on the cheater's part. Infatuation is purely a chemical process - not something magical you just have to grasp whenever it pops up near you.

No. 83838

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
Very strongly, just hearing about it pisses me off. I realize situations and people are complicated, but I always try to tune out of conversations about infidelity since it will just "trigger" me.

There's just no excuse for cheating, it's a reflection of the shitty insides of the cheater. And it is never the cheatee's fault, even if their libido is low or they gain weight…it's on their partner to not be a fucking coward and break up with them. Or grow up and realize love has sacrifices. I have a high as fuck libido and I prefer very slender men, but if my future husband got chub and had a low sex drive I'd stay as long as I loved him. And if he decided he wanted to get buff or stopped cleaning himself I'd just talk it out and break up if necessary. Like a fucking adult. idk these excuses just never flew in my book.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?

Yes, even if they were just chatting someone up I'd dump. I know what I want and will not settle for an asshole.

>Would you forgive it to a point?

Forgive in the sense that I wouldn't rage at them and beat someone for it. I'd just get rid of them.

>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?

See above.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

Some blame unless my partner raped them. It's never the other person's fault entirely (responsibility lies in the hands of the taken person), but they're probably a selfish individual and I'd judge them for it.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

No, I'm just spergy about it because Daddy Issues.

>Have you ever been with a taken person?

No, if I learn someone is taken that I find attractive I put a wall up inside myself. I am no hypocrite.

No. 83844

I'm exactly with you anon
There's nothing quite like the rush of a crush but the reality of cheating would just be a regretful mistake b that leaves you feeling shitty. Even whenever I fall head over heels for someone in a chemical sense, I know that in reality it's only a small chance that I build a better life with them than I already have with my long term partner. What's the point throwing away all of our history just for a moment of passion or to try to start again with someone?
When you have a good thing then you don't let it go

No. 83848

Never been cheated on that I know. My parents separated due to cheating and the other woman has consistenly still tried to ruin my mum and our lives. If I found out my boyfriend cheated on me I'd drop him and never speak to him again no matter how much it hurt me to.

No. 83860

off topic but I remember when Angelina Jolie got so much shit for being a 'homewrecker'. Imo Brad practically got off scot-free and Angelina took the fall for everything.
What are your thoughts on this anons?

No. 83879

Men cheating on women seems to be taken less seriously than the other way around. If a man cheats, excuses like
>she gained weight
>she didn't want sex as much as I did
>another women tempted me
are sometimes seen as "understandable", however if a women were to use these same excuses she would be seen in a much more negative light. Once I read a story about how a woman instantly divorced a man for cheating on her. Many of the comments said things like
>she's selfish for not trying to work things out for the sake of her kids, single mothers are terrible for children, etc.
I'm sure if the genders had been reversed the man would have been praised for his decision.

No. 83881

I'm actually fine with my boyfriend kissing or fucking another girl, providing he tells me beforehand. I don't consider that cheating. I've told him this but he has no desire to do any of that. BUT if he went behind my back and did either of those things or had a relationship with another person that's not okay.

If he did it once and I found out, I'd probably give him another chance since we've been together almost a decade. In fact, if he was really into this girl and she was cool with me maybe I'd try to make it work out. Polyamory seems to be pretty trendy these days. But only once, never a second time. Especially since I'm so chill with him experimenting with my permission and there's no need for him to go behind my back.

I think all of the blame for cheating goes on the person who is in the relationship. They've betrayed the trust the two had. I know that's an unpopular opinion though because most people tend to put the blame on the ~evil temptress~ who drew the ~helpless man~ away from his relationship.

No. 83889

disgusting cuck

No. 84014

File: 1527829473342.png (320.77 KB, 500x375, 1497122110937.png)

I've been through some horrendous situations but my sappy soul has probably been more traumatized by being cheated on than anything else. My ex best friend would often act like it was her job to sleep with guys that i had been with/was in to, sometimes in the same house while i was crying in the next room. She had one of those bullshit open relationships and I felt so bad for her cucked bf as well. I think we shared a silent solidarity. If a person is so much as cybering with someone while in a relationship with me, I will lose my shit and ghost them for the rest of my life.

i think its fucking disgusting. I've definitely been attracted to other people and even had a brief thought sexually about them but I usually just snap out of it, i feel like that's normal. I look at my partner and feel like whoa i'm lucky and happy, tho, that was an odd thought. if i have a specific fantasy about something i bring it up to them and don't search for it in others. How hard is it to break up with someone before you move on and fuck someone else ffs? Also love takes sacrifice and work to some degree, a partner isn't going to cater to every single one of your whims. That's just life, and you can choose to deal with it or not.

That being said, I am aware it isn't all black and white. There are people who are being abused who find comfort in other people. I'd use Eerie cheating on Joji for example. I feel as if that was a method of escape and validation. Like that is pretty damn excusable. Bitch was stuck with his ass for 10 years

No. 84016

I think cheating is the most trust breaching thing you can do in a relationship and I've always said I'd break up and never forgive a betrayal like that.
On the other hand, to some extent I think I might not be able to actually end things if it happened. I'm hugely insecure and have remained in a physically abusive for multiple years before giving up. So in reality I probably wouldn't have enough of a backbone for it.

No. 84019

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
Shits fucked up. I would know, coming from both angles.
>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?
I was cheated on multiple times by different people but I was so out of sorts that I didn’t actually believe/see it for awhile until we were broken up. I’ve learned my lesson though, and I’m pretty sure I’d dump my boyfriend and never look back if he ever did, relationships just can’t recover after that.
>Would you forgive it to a point?
>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?
>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?
Half the blame. The girl that cheated with my last ex knew we were in a relationship and persued him anyway, cokewhore witch bitch. Just as unforgivable.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on? Have you ever been with a taken person? Share your experience.

Never been with a person who was taken to my knowledge because I’d never stoop to that level no matter how much I adored the person or hated their s.o., but I’ve been the cheater and cheatee. Last 2 bfs cheated on me, one had a gf who miraculously appeared on fb right after he dumped me, the other was a long term bf who honestly probably talked to a lot of women because he was that type of guy. Sucks for him, he tried to have his cake and eat it too and has no one now.
I cheated on my ex husband. Though I had my reasons (literal dead beat NEET that left every single housework task to me even though I worked full time, played video games literally all day, didn’t interact with me in a romantic or sexual way once we got married) I still felt guilt because that’s probably the worst thing you could do to someone you’re in a monogamous romantic relationship with aside from physical violence and I do not condone it under any circumstances. It’s odd in a way because I don’t regret the actions I took and it helped me realize I didn’t love him anymore and it was time to call it quits. He was devestated, but it honestly seemed like he was more hurt I wanted to break up than the cheating. In the end he “forgave” me and tried blackmailing me into staying with him. My family didn’t seem the least bit surprised or all that upset I cheated, they were angry at him for trying to “ride the gravy train” and basically gave me a pass.

No. 84026

>I'm actually fine with my boyfriend kissing or fucking another girl, providing he tells me beforehand.
God damn, anon….Love yourself.

No. 84030

I'm not really bothered by cheating. There could be reasons for it. I don't really judge someone on the sole basis of cheating, people in abusive relationships cheat and their abuser will use that to guilt/isolate/abuse them.
I've been cheated on and it didn't really bother me, we broke up and that was that. I don't really allow myself to be vulnerable enough to let the other person affect my self esteem, if they cheat that's not my fault and maybe they aren't as happy as they deserve to be.
If you cheat you have to accept you are most likely going to get dumped though. If you cheat and your partner finds out and you beg to stay with them you're just an idiot though

No. 84031

Also people will excuse being overprotective or jealous or other unhealthy behaviours on the fact they have been cheated on and everyone will think it's justified.

No. 84035

I mean, I've already explained that he never has or has no intention of doing so. I don't really see the problem if it's something I consent to. It's the people who go behind each other's backs that are the problem and are absolutely disgusting human beings.

No. 84042

This! My ex had been cheated on in a previous relationship, so based on that past experience he never trusted me either when we dated. He would throw temper tantrums if I even talked to my male co-workers. He was convinced that I would cheat on him. That level of absolute distrust only made me dislike him so I ended up dumping him and dating my male co-worker who I'm still with 5 years later so yeah.

No. 84044

never been cheated on, if i did i would dump asap and never forgive. dont be such pathetic doormats, ladies

No. 84056

I've cheated before but I've changed and would dump my current boyfriend if he cheated on me because it'd mean he's just as shitty as I used to be

No. 84108

If my fiance cheated I would literally never talk to him again. He knows this. like, I wouldn't bother being enraged or burning his life down etc. He's just cut off from me. I don't care if it's 5 or 10 years from now and we have kids and a house. The second I find out, it's over and all communication will be restricted to children and finances. We have a very peaceful, loving and cooperative relationship, have never fought and have zero jealousy or antagonism between us. I don't fuck around with betrayal or lies. I want a fulfilling and rewarding relationship, not a war. I think women who take back cheaters have very low self-respect or have deeply internalized misogyny. They sadden and frustrate me. People who cheat are lazy and too cowardice to end an unhappy relationship.

No. 84209

If it came down to having so little respect for your boyfriend then why say cheating doesn't reflect on them?

No. 84213

Cheating is the worst thing you can do in a relationship, even beyond abuse in my opinion.

I have no problem with casual flirting, that's just a normal part of interaction with other people. Both for men and for women, there's no divorcing sexual interest from the way we observe and interact with others. But once you start going out of your way to interact with people that flirt with you, or go so far as to fuck them, then it's just over. Cheating is the one thing that is absolutely unacceptable because it violates the base terms of what it is to enter into a relationship with someone, which is monogamy, exclusively being intimate with that person.

It scares me that one day I could be in the situation of having kids and a house with someone that ends up cheating on me. Don't know if I would be strong enough to end it, but I hope I would be.

No. 84243

I've been cheated on. I divorced his stupid ass ASAP.

It was at a really bad time though. I'd been dealing with untreated postpartum depression that turned into just regular old depression, plus a pretty serious eating disorder, and on top of that, a breast cancer scare (which later turned out to be nothing serious). He cheated in the middle of all of this—like before I found out I was in the clear, while I was still convinced I was about to die, and kinda wanted to, but still had to stay alive and keep it together for my kid. Plus we were broke as fuck.

The woman he cheated with knew he was married—we shared a best friend, so we sort of knew each other. He broke it off with her in an attempt to salvage our relationship, even though I told him I was leaving and there was nothing he could do to change my mind. I even told him he should stay with her, because he'll be awfully lonely soon.

It's cool now though. I'm working my dream job, doing the thing I've wanted to do since I was five years old. I'm living with my boyfriend, who is a handsome professor at a prestigious university on the East Coast. We travel, go to nice events, eat good food, drink good wine, and I don't have to worry about money anymore.

He is living in a shitty apartment with no college education, waiting tables in his 30s, drinking lots of beer, smoking lots of weed, playing lots of video games, and not really doing much of anything at all.

She's still a single mom with no college education, also waiting tables, still living in the shitty little town she grew up in. Still simultaneously crazy and boring.

They're not together, and they're both still thirsty as hell.

Feels good.

No. 84338

Hell yeah! That's a great end to the story and I'm so happy things have worked out for you (and it's nice to see that ass got his comeuppance). You're super strong!

Personally I'd probably deal with cheating really badly. I'm in a relationship now and I'd honestly lose control and throw something at my partner and tell them to leave and that they can arrange for movers to get their stuff. For someone to do something that horrible to their partner I wouldn't care if they had to crash on a friend's couch or at a hotel until they found a new place. They ruined the relationship so they should leave. I've had a past bf pressure me into sex by threatening to cheat on me and the threat of it was so horrible enough. I would be so utterly devastated if the cheating actually happened. Especially if it turned out my partner actually loved the person they slept with making it both emotional and physical cheating. That would be the worst

No. 84350

>She's still a single mom with no college education, also waiting tables, still living in the shitty little town she grew up in.

Well good thing the professor is paying your way else you'd be the same.

No. 84360

I think you missed the part where she mentioned getting her dream job there anon. I'm also going to assume she has a degree given her talking about them not having one so it's likely she had a job before this too just likely a shit one or at least not the one she really wanted. I don't doubt she's not just riding off the back of her current partner and would have had a life regardless of this new partner

No. 84362

why do you say that? anon said she got her dream job as well as getting with the professor, maybe her job pays well.

No. 84369

My ex "boyfriend" cheated on me for nearly the entire duration of our relationship. I put "boyfriend" in quotations because even though I repeatedly asked for assurance that we were exclusive, that it was a legitimate relationship, etc. and he assured me that that's what it was he claimed he was "joking" and thought that I knew he was kidding the whole time. For a year. Looking back, I should have seen the signs. It ended with him becoming official with one of the other girls. I don't think I can ever trust any man ever again

No. 84399

>paying anyone's way

No. 84400

That's why American dating culture is cancer. If you go out with one person you have to stop going out with them before hooking up with someone else. Not your fault anon, he's an ass.

No. 84402

File: 1528280480067.gif (1.02 MB, 235x133, 1503934877920.gif)

My ex cheated on me and I found out randomly when checking his computer while he was out and I had a day off. He left his Gmail account logged in and I tried to open mine but redirected to his. Then one of the first emails had the name of the girl he supposedly didn't talk to anymore. I opened it and it said something like "He had a lot of fun last week, hope to see you soon, wanna go to place x?". I didn't want to be paranoid, when I found out about this girl he told me she was just his friend but he could block her if I wanted. I said nothing but he did anyway. I played dumb for a few weeks, then I cheated on him with a friend of his and posted nudes on the board he went to which he instantly recognised it was me, he got angry seeing a lot of dudes wanting to fuck me and asking for contact info. A few days after that we broke up. I never even hooked up with the people from that board, just wanted to fuck with him.

Few years later he tried to be friends with me and noticed he was dating a former friend, knowing she was abusive and knowing he abusive I told nothing to both parts and just watched the drama in the following months until they broke up because they overshared on Facebook a lot. After they broke up I just blocked them because it wasn't fun anymore.

No. 84452

A guy I met on Tinder used me to cheat on his girlfriend of 4 years. He'd presented himself as single, but after we had met and hooked up, I started to get a feeling that something was very wrong. 30 minutes of online research later, I found the name of his girlfriend, and proceeded to contact her with dozens of screenshots and chat logs that proved what had happened. I felt so fucking bad about it and so angry. She seemed shocked. She told me that they had discussed opening their relationship over a year ago but that they had never officially agreed to do it.

He didn't make it easy to find the truth either. It was only through his profile on Couchsurfing that I found his info connected to a young woman's from the same city. I managed to find her Facebook (which was under a different name), but the privacy was all locked down, so I couldn't be sure of anything. However, her mother had some public photos of her, her daughter, and the guy on vacation, and those photos made it obvious they were together.

I have absolutely no regrets telling the girl about what was happening. I feel like I was able to pull the fire alarm in her house before she realized it was already burning down. I have NO respect for cheaters and would dump one immediately, and I am fucking disgusted that me being 'the other woman' is going to be a stain on my conscience forever, despite the fact that it happened without my knowledge or consent. UGH.

No. 100128

In high school I had a girlfriend that had a relationship that was a little too close to her lesbian friend, the kind of lesbian that is very guy-like. They would hug each other too pasionately, I didn't think much of it back then but in hindsight I don't think I could put up with it. Her parents didn't let us her be very physical. Her mom once caught her with her friend being a little to close and raged thinking it was me and once she found out it was her friends was so embarrassed. What do you cows think? Do you think it was cheating?(USER HAS BEEN PUT OUT TO PASTURE)

No. 100131

begone scrot

No. 100135

I think you should coat your nuts in a generous helping of bengay and fuck off

No. 100141

Recently my friend group was split up cause two of them were dating and then one of them started cheating with another friend in the group. It’s really fucked everything up. I hate cheaters.

No. 100151

Begone scrot

No. 100265

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
For my own relationship(s) very strongly because it always makes me feel like I have failed. I do get slightly upset when I read or hear about people cheating, but usually brush it off with "not my relationship" and that's about it. I personally wouldn't want to get anyone else involved either.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?

I honestly don't know. At this point I probably would. I'm not sure though.

>Would you forgive it to a point?


>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?

Absolutely not. Even if it was a one time occurance, I need to talk it out and as it will affect our future relationship, I need to be able to bring it up from time to time.
If it was a regular occurance I wouldn't even bother with the relationship.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

A lot. I have absolutely no respect at all for anyone that hooks up with someone knowing fully well they're in a (monogamous) relationship. Even if I knew someone's relationship is about to end or anything, I wouldn't get involved until they're actually broken up. THIS is actually something that really triggers me. When someone excuses cheating with someone taken by being like 'oh but they were as good as broken up anyways'. No. Just no.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

Both. When I was like 16 and mentally very unstable I made out with another girl while being in a LDR with a guy.
And last year my boyfriend of 3 years fucked a girl after taking mdma, even after I had told him several times that his friendship with her made me feel uneasy and that I was afraid of that happening.

>Have you ever been with a taken person?

No, never. And I never would.

No. 100544

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
Pretty strongly. I have always been a monogamist, wanted to get married and be with one person forever, that kind of thing.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?

I would dump a boyfriend instantly over it if I was in that situation. I am married now and pregnant and I still believe I would get a divorce if I found out my husband had been unfaithful but the process and question of finances would make things more complicated and it would probably take me time to get my things in order before I could officially leave.

>Would you forgive it to a point?

I'm not sure, I feel it would hurt me a great deal and make me incapable of trusting that person again.

>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?

No. I think I would be honest to those close to me if they asked why the relationship failed. I wouldn't owe it to him to cover up what he did in order to protect his image.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

I would think little of that person but my husband/partner would be ultimately responsible for cheating. I don't believe in the seductress trope who can sway an otherwise faithful man. I think his heart has to be rotten in order for him to act on any advances from other women.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

Neither, or at least I am almost certain I haven't been cheated on in a relationship. I did have a boyfriend who was a legitimate porn addict though, so there was a sense of betrayal in that relationship that ultimately led to its demise.

>Have you ever been with a taken person?


No. 100545

Anon, love yourself.

No. 100553

The only reasonable situation I could excuse cheating in is if you have been without sex or intimacy forever and your partner is a jerk and tries to blackmail using legal/custody/abuse measures. Its honestly a rare situation to be in so most of the time cheaters are scum.

No. 100558

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
Pretty strongly if its a serious relationship. My parents divorced after my mum cheated on my dad, and I had to grow up watching the effects it had.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?

I'd hear them out, but most likely I'd dump them, yeah. It would be really difficult, but it would also be much harder to keep a relationship going once trust has been broken so harshly like that.

>Would you forgive it to a point?

It depends on the situation. It'd take me a while regardless, but I wouldn't want to stay bitter.

>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?


>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

Minimal. It's an asshole thing to do to try and get with someone that's taken, but they weren't the one that made the commitment.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on? Have you ever been with a taken person?

My friend's boyfriend got really touchy-feely with me in high school, but I quickly started avoiding them both so I didn't have to deal with it, so I guess none of the above?

No. 100620

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?

Very very strongly. I once got cheated on and it was the worst experience in my life. It made me feel super paranoid & I still deal with those feelings of distrust to this day. I want my partner to only look at & love me. I don't wanna share my loved one. Cheaters are the worst kind of people.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them? Would you forgive it to a point? Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?

Yes, I would dump them immediatly. If you can't only love me fuck off.
I would probably never forgive it. Cheating is something to not take lightly - if someone cheats on you they are an overall rotten person and not worth your time.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

A lot, because they are probably also an overall rotten person and human trash if they knew that the significant other had a bf/gf. If they didn't knew and apologized for it would be a different situation of course.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on? Have you ever been with a taken person? Share your experience.

I once got cheated on and dumped that piece of shit - best decision of my life. No, I've never cheated on a loved one and never will - I'm better than that.

No. 100640

I cheated once. I was in a very bad place mentally (to the point of suicide) and I can't even tell you what went through my mind aside from the intense guilt and low self worth for months and months afterwards. I don't want my low mental health to be an excuse, I'm just mentioning it so you can get a hold of my mimdframe.
My partner at the time was treating me very badly and had really purposefully messed my finances around so I was basically in major debt, but even so it's still my fault that I cheated. I don't think there's a week that goes by without me beating myself up about it. I've not cheated on any other partner and I think knowing how cheating felt, I never could again.

That said, I wouldn't allow someone to cheat on me. Just because I've done it doesn't mean I'd stay with someone.

No. 100646

I did the same. I was in a heavily abusive relationship to the point of suicide and his friend knew how bad it was and took advantage of it. Just talking me up like, "I know he's a dick, I can rescue you from him, we can get away together and be happy" and so I cheated and thought I would be free.

I wasn't. He told my bf and the whip came down on me harder and I had no escape, couldn't trust anyone and fell apart even more. It was truly hell. He dumped me like 6 months after hanging it over my head every single day, using it as justification for telling me to kill myself and how he hated me but would be the only one who'd ever love me because I was worthless, etc. Funny that he was cheating on me the entire time and left me for her.

Looking back I hate that I did it and don't justify it, my head was completely fucked like yours. I'd never cheat now and if my current cheated I'd leave.

No. 100647

a similar thing happened to be but he really did save me like he said. he got a job and an apartment for us to live in for a while. our relationship didn't last, but he saved me.

No. 100648

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?
>Would you forgive it to a point?
No. I make it very clear that it's not something I'm okay with, so there's nothing to forgive.
>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?
No, on the contrary, I'd tell everyone why our relationship ended.
>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?
As much as I do on the cheater, if they knew there was really no excuse.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

I've been cheated on this year. It wasn't very difficult to figure out - he'd been hiding his phone screen whenever he texted and answering mundane questions like "how was your day" in a very unnecessarily hostile manner like "stop being so nosy, I don't feel comfortable talking about my day to other people" or "it's none of your business". He was quite unstable so I don't feel too bad about it, but it felt awful to be the village idiot and to know they hate you so much they would do that to you.
>Have you ever been with a taken person?

No. 100666

I'm rather tolerant/understanding of the people around me cheating on their SOs mainly because nobody seems to be able to keep it in their pants ffs. It's embarassing.

In my own relationships, however, zero tolerance. I'm not even comfortable with the idea of a threesome. Love should be sacred.

I've never cheated or been cheated on, I did almost hook up with a married man, though and I'm so glad that he stood me up. I don't know what I was thinking.

No. 100697

File: 1542137755672.gif (748.98 KB, 500x269, 1486577804507.gif)

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
Pretty strongly depending on the circumstances
>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?
Yes, I would be hurt but relationships aren't exactly a priority to me. I'm fine on my own
>Would you forgive it to a point?
First strike and you're out
>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?
See above
>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?
Most of the blame would be directed towards my partner so I'd say 60/40

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

I've cheated and have had partners cheat on me before
>Have you ever been with a taken person?
Sex yes, relationship no
>Share your experience.
I had a lot to drink with a colleague who I was good friends with and we had sex. We were both in a relationship with other people but attracted to each other, sex was good regret wasn't

No. 100699

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?
>Would you forgive it to a point?
>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?
Why would I?
>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?
Less than on him, but that doesn't make her any less of a slut (unless she was also tricked by him and had no idea about me).
>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?
No to both.
>Have you ever been with a taken person?

No. 100710

i kissed girls when i was at the psych ward because i was lonely and wasn't allowed to see my SO. should i tell her eventually, anons? or take it to the grave?

No. 100712


Oh no, are you two me? I was in an abusive relatinship last year with a guy who was constantly lying to me about everything and implied he was cheating on me with other people, as well as flirting with his cousin, and meeting his ex who he was never really over. I was at breaking point and fell a little for a friend, who would let me stay over his house and just be round his family and pets because he couldn't stand the idea of me crying in my room alone after my ex had driven home and slammed my door over and over again. We kissed once when I was crying but I refused to ever sleep with him, but I felt so horrible that we kissed even though it was heat of the moment, despite the fact my abusive boyfriend was never really faithful to me in the first place.

No. 100727

I was the cheater in my relationship

My relationship was very mentally and emotionally abusive…I also was occasionally slapped and hit in the face a few times
Any mention of me leaving was met with I’ll kill myself if you go, she also would then try and hurt herself in front of me
Grabbing a bottle of pills and trying to swallow them all, attempting to grab a knife and cut herself, punching herself in the head and shit like that
It made me so fucking miserable, I didn’t want to leave and have her commit suicide then live my life knowing it was my fault
I moved to a state where I knew no one and had barely any money and no friends
I tried to commit suicide myself by taking a bunch of pills and alcohol
Guess I didn’t take enough because I woke up the next day feeling like shit and broke down

I met someone online and stated talking to them about my bs and everything
Through my misery I was actually happy and excited to wake up and talk to them
Then I sent them a few pictures of me and a video

Eventually she found out and I got out, though my online friendship turned out to be a sham
I got posted on the chan with picture address and everything…at least it was a good photo
My ex sent a nasty Facebook message from my account to everyone on my friendslist

I know I had fault in our relationship, I could have tried harder to get out. Should have asked for help. I know I’m a huge chunk to blame but I don’t take all the responsibility.
If I could go back and do things differently I would…
Though I’ll never do it again, it’s not worth it in the end and ever will be

No. 100754

We're going to need a little background for our opinions to mean anything.

No. 100760

>playing the pronoun game
It's hard to be sympathetic when your use of 'them' is so distracting. Pick a gender, there are only two.

No. 100765

"Them" is also used when you don't want to mention a person's gender. Stop derailing.

No. 100779

Does it even matter? I used it twice to describe the same person
Anyways it was a guy

No. 100791

>uses she for ex gf
>uses them for someone else

fuck off.

No. 100797

Wow that butt hurt by it
I have my own reasonings for using them
But go off I guess

No. 100819


late replier, but boi do I relate on the front of watching drama unfold, it feels like some kind of revenge, but without getting your hands super dirty.

I've gotta tell this story because I've kept this in for so long

My main reason for breaking up with ex, was because of this other friend group he had at this liberal arts college. In the group, he once had a crush on this girl he grew up with, but they remained "best friends" while they consistently acted like a couple for years. This was all due to their hyper-liberal friend group believing that "cuddling, rubs, and intimacy can be platonic!" and they all consistently had relationship issues and cheated on their significant others. Half of them were non-binary too.

Every time we'd all hang out, I was expected to be chill with them cuddling. I had spoken out multiple times but it took a month for him to consider that it was inappropriate and to quit. I was more mad with him, than her, but she for sure irritated me. She pretended like she didn't know it obviously made me uncomfortable, and she even told me I was too "traditional."

Fast forward another month, I break up with him, he's a mess weirdly enough. He tries hard to prove to me how much he's over me, and invites me to one of their parties. I end up talking to this one guy from their inner friend group who is super interested and knows I'm single now. We hit it off, and then I get pulled aside by the girl who always cuddled with my ex. She goes "So I really like that guy you're talking to, and have for awhile, and you guys being close is kinda making me anxious" and I intentionally replied with more or less "Oh don't worry, it's totally fine. We're just gonna cuddle, it's completely platonic!"

She had the audacity to think it's cool to be intimate with my boyfriend for months, but the moment I touch her /crush/ she thinks it's different.

So him and I do that on the couch, and she leaves the party crying. I usually am such a softie and hate seeing another girl cry because I can be sensitive too, but wow I was so goddamn amused.

No. 100822

Channeling my inner Taylor Nicole Dean here. My ex raped a girl when he was drunk and I stayed for a long time because I was in denial. I ended up leaving him but I feel bad for his victim because I initially treated her like a liar.

Sometimes I think about reaching out to her and seeing if there's any way I could help her convict him, but I no longer have any messages from him that could be used as evidence as this was years ago and I've since gotten new phones/deleted social media and didn't think to save any incriminating info at the time.

Sometimes I think about reaching out to my ex and seeing if I can get him to talk about it so I can collect enough evidence to get him convicted, but I'm not a fucking private detective and this happened a long time ago. I have no clue if the girl wants to press charges or open that door. If she did I assume she would have reached out to me already. I wonder if she thinks about it at all and how she would feel if she knew I was willing to testify on her behalf.

No. 100824

just be that person anon, you may not be a PI, but all PIs start freelancing to begin with. A guilty conscience loves comfort.

Redeem yourself, and offer her solace if she chooses to pursue legal remedies.

No. 100828

Fuck that girl expecting you to back off. Good on you.

No. 100830

That's beautiful karma, I love it

No. 100847

Delicious anon.

No. 100849


ty anons.

Bonus points for her posting on twitter later that week about having bpd lel

No. 100858

File: 1542312911808.png (587.72 KB, 642x701, disgust.png)

all of this is just vomit inducing. i had a friend group just like that once and they all joked about their "incest" because everyone had dated each other. they were really shitty people despite being extreme SJWs and stuff. sage for blogging

No. 101996

I don't blame somebody who sleeps with somebody who's in a relationship and they don't know. But if they know? Trash people. Don't need them in my life.

No. 102037

I don't blame my mom for cheating on my dad now that I'm an adult and can admit that he was an alcoholic, abusive POS.

What I don't forgive her for, however, is never leaving him.

No. 102207

god, my family has had the same situation.
my mom cheated on my dad recently, she even told him she was cheating.
he put our family into deep debt, all he would ever do when he got home from work was demand food be ready for him and complain to me about 'doing nothing around the house'. anything else he did was sleep and watch football replays. he never paid bills, except bills for our old house he refuses to sell and 'rent' to my uncle's ex-wife, who won't even pay rent so that's even more money my dad's shilling out trying to be the "good guy". he crashed every car my mom has had.
his existence was basically nothing to us. he got his license taken away one year and he made me drive him to work an hour away despite having a coworker that gladly offered to carpool him, he refused because she wanted to leave earlier than he liked.
i demanded my mom kick my dad out of the house because of how much we all disliked him. it worked for a few weeks, then my dad came back because my mom let him. i saw who my mom was cheating on my dad with and i so badly waited for the day my dad was out for good. it never happened. i'm sure she told him she was cheating so he would change, but it won't. they went to a financial advisor and everything and in the back of my mind i'm repeating to myself "he's the problem, kick him out".
my mom's a narc too. i bet she didn't want to seem like a failure to all her facebook friends, but she's failed in my eyes for letting my dad stay.

No. 103392

Honestly, if I ever got a bf/husband somehow and he cheated on me, I wouldn't do anything.
Men can't really stay faithful, and I wouldn't blame him for wanting to be with other women.

No. 103393

What if it was a regular thing with the same woman? Or in your shared bed?

No. 103394

As long as he didn't divorce me, I'd just be happy to be married.

No. 103395

As long as you don't pressure other women to accept it (like that anon in /ot/ did a couple of months ago) then that's fine. Open relationships work best for some people.

No. 103400

Bf I would dump fairly quickly granted I wouldn't have major ties to him, and just an apartment plus misc. stuff to dissolve.

Husband though? Considering there's financial implications and possibly even a family, breaking up wouldn't be so easy. I might be in the same boat as you ladies in that case. Marriage is definitely something to work on first before throwing in the towel, for many sakes.

No. 103663

same. of course the cheater is the guiltiest but I dont give a pass to a knowing accomplice. Both are trash, simple as that

No. 103724

I was in a long distance relationship and I felt like my boyfriend wasn’t spending enough time with me. we would rarely have 1on1 phone calls (only group calls.) and I’d go weeks without seeing his face and vice versa. I complained about this numerous times and told him I felt lonely.
I ended up cheating and he found out. I regret it a lot and wish I handled the situation better. Cheating is inexcusable and I feel horrible.

No. 103840

…how did your LDR find out about an affair? like, how would he have possibly found out?

No. 103843

NTA but I could think of several ways

- maybe he knows social media/mail passwords (my ex and I shared all social media account info for some reason)
- maybe he snooped through her phone/computer/stuff while one was visiting the other
- friends saw her or she talked to someone about it and he just got told

idk, it’s not like they NEVER saw or see each other

No. 103867


Men and women are perfectly capable of not cheating. If you're into having an open relationship that's cool but maybe just find some better men to date lol

No. 103870

she probably told him.

No. 103929

I’ve told my sister that if I’m ever in another relationship with a man I will have to cheat on him. Every guy I’ve ever been in a relationship with has cheated on me might as well do it to them before they do it to me.

No. 103930

enjoy dying alone. it's not your future bfs fault you have poor judgement.

No. 103931

lol you fucking retard. thats the same as some idiot justifying their shoplifting by claiming to be poor so they deserve it.

how about work through your bitterness instead of making it worse. gl in life sweaty

No. 103935

Idk. It is what it is. I’m not really bitter about it though. I couldn’t imagine that anyone would actually be upset if I slept with somebody else

No. 103936

Idk. It is what it is. I’m not really bitter about it though. I couldn’t imagine that anyone would actually be upset if I slept with somebody else

No. 103937

Idk. It is what it is. I’m not really bitter about it though. I couldn’t imagine that anyone would actually be upset if I slept with somebody else

No. 103938

Idk. It is what it is. I’m not really bitter about it though. I couldn’t imagine that anyone would actually be upset if I slept with somebody else

No. 103987

Anons, the guy I cheated with told someone WHO told him. so not only was I unfaithful, but also fucking retarded.
I didn’t sleep with him, at the very least. But still, cheating is horrible and never worth it.

No. 104003

this is exactly how i feel. i've been with my partner for over 5 years so i'm completely secure in the fact that he loves me, even if he makes a mistake.

No. 104006

Honestly, I’ve cheated on every boyfriend I’ve ever had. I love the attention I get from multiple guys and I especially cheat on my e-bfs. I can juggle so many at a time, I think my highest is 10. I’ve had boyfriends for over a year and I didn’t even realize they thought we were dating until they said “happy anniversary.” Sometimes I feel bad but otherwise I don’t really care because I like cheating.

No. 104020

ive never been cheated on to my knowledge but if i'd found out my attraction would go from 60-0. i wouldn't even be able to stay with someone who disrespected me like that, because it'd be impossible to love them anymore. I was chatting up this guy for awhile who eventually admitted to cheating on his ex and I dropped him on the spot just because any attraction I had completely shriveled up and died.

cheating isn't a mistake, it's a very conscious effort. they made the series of intentional choices to betray you. no one trips into a vagina and goes "oops, I cheated," they actively pursued fucking this person behind your back.

No. 104030

i agree that it's awful to go behind someone's back, but people do a lot of dumb shit intentionally. personally i find a lot of things worse than cheating that others may think are minor offenses. i guess i forgot to mention that if they talked to me about it first and they were certain it would add to their life in a positive way then i would support him. i hope he would do the same for me.

No. 104034

File: 1545818912976.png (1000.29 KB, 1280x720, Lisa_1.png)

I admire how you were able to juggle 10. I mostly would have one main boyfriend, and then the most I had was like.. 4 side-guys. I would use them all for a combination of emotional support/ sex/ etc. As for myself, I don't really care much on being turned on knowing that I'm cheating. It's moreso having a void in your heart that you use other men for. If one man doesn't have what you want, you seek another and… the cycle continues. It's hard to find a man that encompasses all of the traits and qualities I look for in an ideal partner, so I just juggle them. It's pretty sad and inevitably I do get caught but, it's just the reality I have to face for someone like myself. It's not even being a special snowflake either. I make sure to get STD tested and make sure my schedule matches my plates.

As of right now… I have one main boyfriend, and only have a few side toys I somewhat invest my time in. Iunno. I guess I'm just a sociopath that needs that validation in my life.

No. 104045

Have you tried just having lots of close friends alongside a partner instead, or even being upfront about not wanting monogamy, maybe even just calling yourself poly?
I have a lot of emotional needs too but I found that it's easier to just be honest, hurting people isn't worth it

No. 104053

File: 1545860215081.jpeg (12.9 KB, 225x225, images (3).jpeg)

Jesus fucking christ. I think my day would have been a lot better if I didn't read that.

No. 104080

holy shit are you me?

No. 111891

Sorry for necroing this old and to be honest pretty shit thread but I just woke up from another dream where I made out with my boyfriends best friend and I have to ramble somewhere without getting judged.
I would never cheat on my bf but I still think of his best friend (he would never have sex with me either, he likes them young and blonde and I’m none of that) banging me into the sunset every night. And this just started because he almost lost his head while looking at my boobs at a party once. I hate myself, my boyfriend deserves so much more better than me.

No. 111923

I had exactly the same dream tonight. Me fucking my fiancé’s (Ex)best friend. He is very attractive but an asshole. I would never cheat on my man, he is my soulmate and I love him with all my heart. He’s having a hard time right now and we don’t really have sex right now because of his depression, so I know what’s causing these weird sexual dreams. I don’t actually feel bad for it because I’m a very loyal person and would never cheat on someone that I love but it’s still weird.

No. 111926

I've both cheated and been cheated on. I wouldn't leave someone for cheating on me except maybe if there were really extreme circumstances involved like a love child or if he had a long term affair where they had actual feelings for each other.

No. 111927

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
I think it's fucked up in most circumstances, but there are a lot of other factors. Are you married? Are you in a casual relationship? Is it a long distance thing? I don't know. For my current relationship, I would be deeply hurt.

>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?

Nah, I wouldn't. I'm married now but even before, people can make mistakes and I believe it's not the end of the world.

>Would you forgive it to a point?

If I really loved them, I would try. If I found out my husband cheated on me, it would be painful and take years but I would want to work on our relationship.

>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?

This I can't deal with. No. That would be far too painful, I've been with someone who cheated regularly before and it made me feel like I was losing my fucking mind.

>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?

50/50 blame on the cheater and the one they're cheating with.

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

I've cheated on two of my boyfriends, I was an underage teenager and they were t e r r i b l e adults so I think I should get a pass. If they weren't emotionally abusing me, I probably wouldn't have had to go elsewhere to feel like I was valuable as a person. I felt guilty about it at the time, but now that I'm older I don't feel bad at all lmao. They deserved a lot worse.

>Have you ever been with a taken person? Share your experience

A different boyfriend of mine who cheated on me (woo) and got his ex-girl pregnant. He got super drunk after the funeral of his friend who died, hooked up with her, got a tattoo of her name. it was fucking crazy. he was seeing her for a while when she was first pregnant until she decided to get an abortion. He didn't break up with me, but they were spending an awful lot of time together so I think that's the closest I've come to it. Eventually I broke up with him for unrelated reasons. When I think of my past I fucking cringe and I have no idea how I didn't turn out worse.

No. 111930

My first boyfriend cheated on me multiple times and I was too much of a doormat to leave him for it. Nowadays though, I think I'd just leave a relationship if I found out my partner cheated on me. I have no desire to ever cheat in an relationship because it's an inherently scummy thing to do. Even when my ex told me to just go cheat on him out of revenge, I found it too disgusting to even consider (also his request was probably just his own repressed cuck fetish seeping through there).

No. 112107

>He’s having a hard time right now and we don’t really have sex right now because of his depression, so I know what’s causing these weird sexual dreams.

You answered your own question, anon.

No. 112805

>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

kind of, had some rough times when my SO was almost losing his shit over a gurl he always liked.
for us It's ok if sex happens with other people but there are some very basic, very important rules.

that fool was acting totally out of his mind over said girl, disregarding rules and shit.
almost dumped him about this.
I know the flashy dreamcastle hormones can be quite a ride, but damn..

long story short, in the end we worked it out and learned a lot, but I have seen shit like this go wrong so many times.

imo disrespecting someone who trusts and treats you with respect is why "cheating" is such a horror for most of us, that many of us get jealous as fuck and/or scared of being left alone by someone we trusted.
there are less worse things than people who dump a respectable partner like:
'now it's my new flame and our temporary stupor against the rest of the world! fuck everyone else, disregard everything!'
that's absolutely pathetic human bevahiour and not romantic at all.

But these occasions are always a reality check that some people are self unaware troglodytes who get fucked over by brain chemicals and their own ideals, wishes and whatnot.
unwilling to reflect their own position in the world and acting like they're helpless victims of life who are getting pushed around by overwhelming forces,
personal responsibility is a myth for them.

all that shit taught me to avoid romantic stuff with people who aren't at least trying to be aware of the mechanics.

No. 112810

I think cheating is lame personally because I adore qualities like loyalty. I've never cheated, wouldn't even consider it and I'm even selective when single. I just have certain standards so if someone cheated on me they lose my respect. I wouldn't accept cheating on any terms. If I have an established relationship with a person and our relationship status has certain boundaries and he over breaks those boundaries pursuing someone else then clearly we are not giving each other what we each want.

No. 112906

People that put any blame on the people their partner cheats with are doormats

No. 113169

I would cheat but would also immediately dump a cheater.

No. 113177

Because you can blame both? The person cheating is the worse one of the two, but if someone knows they're taken and still doesn't care and fucks them anyway they're also shitty. It's not "not my problem" if you're hurting someone deliberately and don't care.

No. 113189

File: 1555364856160.jpeg (308.05 KB, 1125x1320, E9EEF019-6BC3-433C-B86E-6C331E…)

>hottie Danish tall friend is coming to my country

I was into him for years but now I have a boyfriend we are getting married soon

Actually considering fucking him and just moving on with my life

No. 113193

No. 113292

What's worse, long term emotional cheating with one person(no sex) or multiple one night stands?

No. 113295

One night stands. First, they've proven they can disconnect themselves from sex and don't see it as special (I do because I'm a romantic fool, sue me). Second, it's risky behaviour and they could catch an STD.

If "emotional cheating" includes kissing/cuddling I'd still consider it bad but not as bad as sex. I'd still break up though.

If "emotional cheating" is just a close, emotional bond with someone of a gender they can be attracted to but no further…I don't care. In that case every bisexual is constantly cheating if they have any close friends while dating. We're bisluts after all.

No. 113314

I also think multiple one night stands. There is nothing accidental about it and after you did it once, you should have repented or broken up. I would definetly break up.

Emotional cheating is not too far away from having a close friend, which everyone is allowed to have. You might not realise you are hurting your relationship at first. If you notice and still continue, or are not willing to give up the relationship when found out, I would still break up. If you cut it off and work with me on bettering the relationship and communication, I would probably get over it.

Since emotional cheating probably has significant influence in the relationship, but physical cheating can be hidden Well, at least emotional cheating gives the other partner the chance to realise something is wrong and leave.

No. 113333

I think it's both despicable and dishonest to such a degree that there is no point in comparing whats worse. If you do either you are bottom feeding gutter trash.

No. 113335

i've never physically cheated but used to have the worst problem with emotional cheating. i think it was just something ingrained in me about knowing i had options but not acting on them. scummy i know, i don't have the conscience to do it anymore.

No. 113342

Why are you assuming the other person always knows the cheater is taken? Even if that's the case, yes they're shitty but the cheating was 0% their fault. The only way I can make sense of blaming the other person is that you have such low self-esteem that you'd be okay with your partner fantasizing about cheating as long as he never goes through with it.

No. 113387

I'm the same, knowing that I had options stopped me from feeling trapped and improved my relationship. I have commitment issues so knowing that I could leave reminded me that I didn't actually want to, and knowing I can get other people to like me reassured me that I only actually want my boyfriend to like me.
It doesn't make it ok though. These things were fine when I had big a social circle and everyone was young and flirting with everyone else but now I only have time for my close friends, and damaging my friendships or work relationships just because of low self esteem or commitment issues isn't worth it anymore. Also I realised how disrespectful it is to my boyfriend. Now I make a point to avoid "orbiter" types and talk about my boyfriend constantly to lower the risk of falling back into those patterns.

No. 113393

wow it sounds like you ended up in the exact same frame of mind as me.
sad thing for me is one of the guys i strung along for a while got really hung up on me and still tries to reach out wherever he can find me. i've had to block him on every imaginable social media and website and i feel terrible that he's still that into me after a few years of ignoring him (in the best interest of my relationship and to be respectful to my bf like you mentioned). weirdly though it's like an ego boost because i always thought he was out of my league anyway. hopefully it's not fucking with his ability to find someone else though, i feel like i broke him lol.

No. 113398

What do you consider emotional cheating? Like having mutual feelings for someone but not acting on them? Having more fun with a guy other than your bf? Being overly flirty or not directly shutting down their flirts?

No. 113401

Emotional cheating definitions vary from person to person but the rule of thumb is that it's whatever would make you feel guilty if you partner was watching.
I think it's healthy to have close friendships and value them as much as romance if not more, but if your partner doesn't make you happy or understand you like your friends do then why be with them?

I tell all my friends that love them or that they're looking nice, but actually flirting with them or implying that I could be interested in more would be crossing the line. If I were to only ever want to talk, spend time with or message them instead of my partner then that's a red flag too. Crushes are natural, it's nobody's fault when it happens, but how you handle that situation reflects on your fidelity. You don't want to accidentally fuckzone your friends or friendzone your partner.

If you made it clear to him that you're not available, and you don't want him to wait for you, then it's not your problem anymore.

No. 113402

nta but for me it was always overtly flirty texting/sliding in dm's that got me in trouble

No. 113407

I think emotional cheating is when someone in a relationship starts developing romantic feelings with someone else. Even if they don't physically act on it if they start becoming a part of each others routine and priority confidents.

Friendships are normal between both sexes and it's pretty obvious when people are friends vs interested romantically in one another.

Like other anons said I guess I had issues when younger with emotional cheating or orbiters. There were guys that would thirst after me online and I would engage with them and I guess encourage the behaviour.

Now that I'm older and more occupied with work and life I've cut ties with all that behaviour. I feel like my bf is out of my league lol and it's the reverse from my last relationship. It's made me reflect on that I did some shit I would be annoyed at my bf doing. I think it's a maturity thing maybe? When we're younger and after coming out of school and routinely being around your peers made you more eager for validation? Idk. Now I've actual goals those ego strokes seem fleeting and a risk to my overall happiness with the relationship I truly care about.

No. 113409

>If you made it clear to him that you're not available, and you don't want him to wait for you, then it's not your problem anymore

I had a problem with telling guys I had an interest in that I wasn't taken and then being really bon-dismissive of their flirts but also non-receptive either. The problem with this approach is that in hiding your relationship from them, saying things like "I don't really want something right now but maybe later" keeps them on the hook. I learned this too late and lost a good friend because o my stupidity. Wish I was honest, he would have probably stopped pushing so hard if he knew I was taken.

No. 113410

I would consider it emotional cheating if they essentially act like a couple without physical intimacy and their partner is not aware of the extent of it. For example, someone who goes out to dinner and movies alone with a friend of the opposite sex, but never discusses this with their SO.

No. 113412

Personally, few things make me disrespect a woman more than attacking your cheating spouse's lover, but putting hardly any blame on your spouse in comparison. Not that I think it's ever okay to be physically violent with your spouse, but I thought it was refreshing how Tiger Woods' wife destroyed his expensive car with a golf club, but all she did to the girls was leave them voicemails and texts telling them she knew they were fucking her husband. I think that's the exact way you should respond to the person they're cheating on you with. It's what I would do at least.

No. 113413

>telling guys I had an interest in that I wasn't taken and then being really bon-dismissive of their flirts but also non-receptive either

yep this is basically what i would do too and actually found being non-receptive made them want me even more (like a hard to get kind of situation?). i don't know. i struggled with low self-esteem for a long time and once i realized how to be in control of my situation with men i was interested in it kind of became like collecting trophies for me (bad and unhealthy, i know). i wouldn't ever end up sleeping with any of them but i think it made them feel like i was challenging their masculinity by NOT being desperate to fuck them so in turn they became desperate. honestly men are pretty easy to manipulate in my experience and it makes me really sad when i hear so many stories about girls letting guys walk all over them or feeling pressured to put out to keep them around.

No. 113414

i agree 100% and have always felt like the term "homewrecker" is so misdirected

No. 113416

I'm pretty forgiving of cheating if it's a rare occurrence, unless they're pretty much a couple or a baby happens. I've been on both the recieving and giving end of it. I would never do it again, though, because I caused so much agony for my husband when I did. I had told him before we got married that I couldn't garuntee full fidelity and he said he was okay with it every once in a while, but when it actually happened he was just so devastated and it took him months to be okay again.

No. 113418

I mean, you're trash but at least you're open about it I guess

No. 113419

Why didn't you tell them you were in a relationship? I understand what you feel about collecting like trophies, it feels somewhat good even if you know it's bad. Low self esteem followed by the realization that you ARE wanted is intoxicating. But I realize I was being terrible and playing with their hearts. I didn't tell them because I wanted them to chase and felt that saying I was in a relationship would make them give up or go for other girls. But I wanted to know what someone else who's done what I did feels.

No. 113420

I don't really see how one can be considered trash if they were straightforward that monogamy can't be expect from them.

No. 113421

>men are pretty easy to manipulate

Forgot to reply to this. Think it goes for either gender tbh. There are girls who fall for the same thing with guys who have several side gfs that don't know each other and kinda tugs all of them along. The ones that put out and let guys walk all over them are probably the ones that are in return getting non-receptive flirts and are unware that the guy is taken. It was this realization that made me stop because I felt "what if someone did this to me" and felt terrible. These guys are really just looking for love, most of them aren't SEX HUNGRY (even if they'd drop their pants at the blink of an eye if I bent over for them) but they were genuinely looking for something serious with me and I was deceiving them on a deep level by playing my games.

No. 113423

>Why didn't you tell them you were in a relationship?

quite literally for the exact same reasons you mentioned. losing out on the "thrill of the chase", the power trip of keeping them hooked. most guys don't actually appeal to "bro code" if they're into you enough but i didn't want to scare off the ones that did. it was also kind of a sociopathic time of my life where i kind of enjoyed keeping secrets from all parties so in my mind it made as much sense to tell the guys i was flirting with that i was single as it did to hide that i was talking to other guys from my boyfriend. there have been a couple that knew i was taken and still pursued though, i think that's just a representation of how little respect they actually have for other mens' situations/feelings. once you're in that territory it's more about you both getting off on the taboo of the whole thing imo.

>It was this realization that made me stop because I felt "what if someone did this to me" and felt terrible.

same, honestly. i had what i'll call an emotional growth spurt a few years ago and finally came to terms with what a huge scumbag i was being. my emotional cheating saga has made me incredibly suspicious of all boyfriends i've had though funnily enough. only because i know how easy it is to hide.

No. 113449

I haven't emotionally cheated on years but honestly reading this thread is starting to make me itch for that validation again even though we're all in agreement that it's a not a cool thing, I feel like some weird triggered junkie kek. I'm >>113387 so it's just as well that I cut off any people that could feed that, maybe this is a sign that I need to take on a new career challenge or something.

No. 113669

>even if they'd drop their pants at the blink of an eye if I bent over for them

Hmmmm…. are you 100% sure of this?

No. 113684

Admitting to being trash doesn't make you a better person, you're just an asshole who is self aware

No. 113690

In my late teens I was in an abusive relationship and cheated several times, mostly emotionally & through nudes and sexting. Did give a handy once too but never anything else.

Fresh out of hs, I was the “other woman”, knowingly. I met a guy who was in a relationship and encouraged him to cheat & leave her. They were living together at the time. We ended up dating, but surprise, he cheated on me as well. That should’ve been a no brainer but I was dumb. I don’t regret having done what I did though, to be frank.

I don’t cheat anymore and I don’t really have the desire to. I’ve been dating the same man for 3 years and never once thought to cheat, and I don’t think I ever would again. It’s a bit cowardly in my opinion. Just break up if you want to fuck someone else.

I don’t care about the act too much myself, I have a low sec drive and don’t put much value into sex. But I think overall it’s a flag that someone isn’t emotionally invested, could have more red flags, and it’s a waste of time. I don’t think too poorly of people who do cheat, as long as they leave the relationship after or try to make it work & leave before cheating again. Mostly I just like to see the partner take the step to dump the cheater, so that they can meet someone better. That being said- the cheater is always to blame in my opinion. Lots of people like to blame the “other” girl or guy, but at the end of the day it was your gf/bf’s opinion. They weren’t tempted by some succubus, they decided on, chose, and acted on a desire. That being said, I expect teenagers to cheat, so while I can understand it being upsetting, as a teen I wouldn’t have expected better, nor do I think teenagers now should of each other. Obviously as an adult you should grow out of cheating.

No. 113697

wow you're so fucking right they're easy to manipulate for whatever reasons they have! this is something i've noticed too and it makes me lose interest in them for some reason, also i hate when guys come to me straightforwardly. the guy i like rn doesn't seem to feel the same and i keep chasing him maybe because of that? it scares me how i'm becoming more manipulative and self aware of what i do around guys like casual touching and stuff… because i can SEE how it messes with them i'm fucked

No. 113703

As a surprise to no one, lot's of farmers are gutter trash. Who would've thought?

No. 113737

>Some anons discuss guys cheating on them, some admit to cheating themselves. The prevalent opinion is that it's unethical or unhealthy at best
>It's a relatively slow thread with more continuous discussion than stand-alone posts
>Somehow this means lots of lolcow users are cheating trash
Gold star critical thinking right there, got anything else to contribute?

No. 113766

Sooo should I tell this woman I don't know, that her husband is cheating? Normally I would mind my own business but they're trying to get pregnant and her period is late. I'm only even considering it because I'm worried about the childs future. I have proof in a msg from him going "I'm cheating on her because …"

Also no, it's not with me I'm just good at making people open up.

No. 113768

This is such devisive topic that someone will always disagree with whatever you choose.
I think you should tell her though, late stage pregnancy is such a vulnerable and helpless state, let her have the choice to leave him whilst she can still lift things.
She might still decide a bandaid baby is perfect though, which leads to 'staying together for the kid'.

No. 113770

They already own a house, car and dog together and is very family oriented. I know he will be away from home for 3 weeks in July and every other weekend from August and 10 months forward(work). That's a lot while she is potentially carrying his child. He does love her, but is doing it because he has sexual needs that are not being met. I'm almost certain he will be able to talk his way out of it(same reason he is not scared to open up about it).

It's a lot of potential damage but she's only 28 and has time for a do over if that's what she wants..

No. 113771

Yes I think you should tell her. I'd personally hate to be married to a cheating loser and have kids with him, sounds like hell. She deserves the truth.

No. 113777

Yes, I've cheated. One of my biggest kinks is having sex with taken men, the more invested (married, kids) they're into their relationships, the more turned on I get. I guess I enjoy the power trip.

No. 113783

I've never shared this story before but I still feel very guilty about it all these years later even though I didn't do it knowingly.

I was in a virgin in college and I met a guy I thought was pretty cute. He would invite me and my roommates over and we'd all drink with his friends. Just for context, we had suite-style dorms, so each suite had 8 or so people living in it. Eventually we had sex, and he would text me on a few occasions to come over and fuck. I didn't really want a relationship with him at the time but I enjoyed the sex and he was attractive and nice. Never once did it dawn on me to ask if he had a girlfriend. I was naive and did not have much experience with relationships (sexual or otherwise) in general so I just kinda rolled with things. I got a little weirded out one time when he invited me over and I just laid on his bed talking to him but not initiating in sex, then he had his suitemate pretend that my roommate had knocked on the door to get me so that I would leave. I know because when I went upstairs she was super confused and had no idea what I was talking about. After that, I didn't go to see him anymore, because I was really weirded out and felt hurt. He texted me a few times after but I just ignored it.

I didn't even know I had him added on Facebook but low and behold he popped up in my timeline with a girl a few months later. Out of curiosity I started looking through his FB and saw he had been in a relationship with this girl since high school, and judging by the pictures posted throughout he had been with her even when we were having sex. It made me feel horrible because she looked like such a sweet, innocent and loving girl and the fact that he had cheated on her really disgusted me. The reason why I've thought of this again is that I saw they're getting married soon.

No. 113784

sorry for the gazzilion posts not sure what happened there haha

No. 113792

men (anyone, really) that decides to CHEAT on their significant other that they're married to bc their "sexual needs aren't being met" are absolute fucking trash in my eyes. esp. men who cheat on their pregnant SOs under the guise of "lolol my SO who's undergoing a huge hormonal change and is under a lot of stress has a low libido so they're useless to me now i'm gonna go fuck somebody else". it just furthers my notion that some men only see us and value us to the extent of our fuckability/availability to fuck.

you should def tell her, with evidence to back you up so she can't cry that you're just "lying to break them up". whether she stays or leaves is her choice. if he hadn't wanted his marriage ruined he wouldn't have cheated or told you about it in the first place.

No. 113794

It's not even because she doesn't put out, she's just a bit vanilla that's all. He even cheated on her before they got married.

I'm gonna try and figure out if she's actually preggo and then tell her sometime when he's away from home or sooner if I have to.

No. 113795

>she's just a bit vanilla, that's all
Woe is he, for his betrothed cannot juggle ten tiki torches with her fanny and do reverse somersaults on his cock whenever the lord of the house demands it.

What a crock of dirty shite.

No. 113799

tbh being cheated on after years of marriage or because I am/was pregnant is a fear of mine. How can you say you love and value someone while you devalue what they've gone through for/with you?

Such a lameass excuse for cheating, wtf. She should know. Fucking dick.

No. 113805

how do you feel about those people who make their partner open up their relationships? i feel like personally it's basically the same thing. usually they convince their partner to change their monogamous relationship to an "open" one, but they're the only ones who get to be open and the partner ends up stuck until they leave them for someone else.

No. 113806

I cheated on a bf with a friend who was married. We had been online friends for 8ish years and were close. I moved to his city for work and school and we ended up meeting and hanging out in group/party settings (usually with our partners present) on occasion. maybe 4 or 5 times a year. After about 3 years of living in the same city we hung out alone for the first time and things escalated so fast with a little alcohol. I regret it so much. We ended our friendship and I miss him sometimes. I feel like maybe I loved him a little but I never want to actively open that can of worms.

No. 113807

I just realised I definitely shouldn't know this much about their relationship and sex life in the first place. He is sharing too much.

I love when it's the guy who wants to open up the relationship and can't find anyone to have sex with, but it's super easy for the woman lmao

No. 113820

The single fact that he is telling you all of these things is highly disrespectful to his wife and weird af. Total dirt bag.

No. 114033

She should just cheat on him with someone who actually makes her cum, then proceed to inform her balls and chain as to why she did it.

Males only learn that something is wrong if you do it right back at them.

No. 123281

Started emotionally cheating again. Whoops. Time to break up with my LTR.

No. 285459

i'll become a serial killer in minecraft to get rid of people like you and men that cheat. thats my power trip

No. 285464

File: 1662366105643.jpg (16.92 KB, 196x275, 959262354.jpg)

I forgave it once because it was just one night of sexting and he immediately confessed the day after, I think he was truly disgusted with himself but even then the relationship did not survive, we broke up right after and it hurt to think about long after the relationship was done. I also cheated once, it was a one-time drunken sexual affair with a woman who was very persistent in pursuing me (she knew I had a boyfriend, she was also his coworker). I also confessed the morning after and also was not able to forgive myself for a long time even. It was the one and only time I have ever cheated or even come close to cheating on a partner. I think finding out from your partner after a very brief regrettable interaction with someone is better than finding out about a long-term affair, especially if you find out about it from some third party. But either way it's pretty sickening. Being on both sides of cheating within the span of a year ruined my ability to believe in love, honestly.

No. 285466

This is going to sound like a scrote take, but I wouldn't care about a woman I'm with cheating with another woman, but I would care if it were with a man. It's not because I don't think that the former is as serious as the latter, but because the former is hot, no risk of pregnancy, less risk of STDs, not dealing with a potentially violent scrote on our case etc. I don't really feel possessive or jealous and it's not like I'm a saint, because I've been with taken women when I was a teen. I don't like how when a scrote is inserted into the situation, automatically their thing becomes the more legitimate situation. Like there is nothing left to forgive, the moment that happens the only future you have with her is maybe as a third, because you've automatically been demoted. Society accepts the new pairing more, the guy acts like he owns the place and was there before you. Maybe he's lesbophobic and ends up being violent. Either way he's going to be a nuisance, so you can't even be friends anymore afterwards. Meanwhile it's also just a lot more gross to me personally. I've been interested in women who were/are in unhappy marriages, but that is one thing, where you would know what you're signing up for. And she's in the process of leaving a scrote, opposite of going for them again. Is it hypocritical of me? Probably.

No. 285468

I've cheated in every relationship I've been in, including the one I'm in currently. I've both emotionally and physically cheated in most of them, with both men and women. Ive "only" emotionally cheated in this one by talking dirty to someone else and nearly going on a date with a random scrote. I've only confessed once and that was so I could break up with the guy. I wouldn't forgive someone for cheating but I also don't expect to be forgiven for the things I've done.

No. 285517

Before we got together I told him I would chop any guy that cheats on me's genitals off.

No. 285523

Dark triad stacy

No. 287225

File: 1662884167006.jpeg (89.17 KB, 716x1035, 7BF102D9-E63C-46A6-8B6B-2E2D5A…)

>have you ever cheated?

>be me,19, retarded , low self esteem

>in a relationship wherein I was groomed and being played but my dumbass kept giving this guy chances.
>tagging along with my friend at a party
>her bf’s friend is there, he is lean and muscular, hot body sort of a butterface white dude
>later that night we were tripping on some acid
>he comes up to me
>he’s flirty, I flirt back, don’t expect it to go anywhere else.
>he follows me to the restroom
> “anon let’s do it”
> “pleeaase I’m dying to.”
>”no thx”
>back and forth
>” I have a bf” I tell him.
>”I won’t tell anyone, you’re just so beautiful and it’ll feel amazing rn”
>I fuck him because why not
>no joke the best sex I’ve ever had, he was so fast and deep with his strokes, and caressed/seduced me so well. This dude was a whore and all his experience wasn’t for nothing
>that was euphoric
>he kisses me after and says I’m beautiful and that was sooo amazing and it’ll stay between us
>the next morning I wake up to my phone going off
>it’s the bf”please tell me it isn’t true”
>I confess
>my friend and her bf told him all about it
>butterface tells everyone he says that I was easy (looking back he pretty much coerced me)
> still hanging out and partying with these people who call me a whore and make me the butt of their jokes for the next week or so.
>one catty little bitch gay moid slaps my face while I’m high off my ass and my friend laughs
>my friend goes through my phone and laughs at me while I’m asleep
>butterface brags about doing me all the time, calls me easy, says he doesn’t love me.
>when we are alone he says I’m so beautiful and he is falling in love with me.
>I finally leave his place, and stop talking to everyone there
>my friend texts me “butterface misses cuddling you while he’s high.”
>he asks me to come back repeatedly for like three weeks
>after this point I just block him
This was a low point in my life there were more factors to me fucking him and staying around only to be called the “ugly friend” and “easy” and a hoe, etc. and trip with them and get drunk. I obviously had such shit self esteem to begin with. From having a shitty family and being bullied, etc. Now I am really socially anxious and I feel dirty sometimes when I’m having sex. My bf that I cheated on forgave me and we tried being friend after a while, he said he would forgive me if we got back together and we did but it did not last. He went on to not yet find another gf that is why groomed me because nobody around his age wants him. He couldn’t even find another dumb young thing.
As for me I am full of regrets and I just want to erase that entire part of my life. Maybe I deserved it, maybe I’m not taking responsibility for my actions, but fuck I feel like I didn’t deserve all of that. He begged me while we were high! I was not in my right mind and he kept on asking and asking and he said I was easy. I do not party anymore for days on end, I go to work and school and I do not have friends anymore. Im honestly distrustful and weary of people now, including myself.
I understand that things could’ve gone so much worse and I could’ve maybe been murdered or something, partying as a girl with a “friend” who throws you under the bus is awful.
my friend got fat. so did her bf, they still party but they depress me because it doesn’t seem fun anymore.
Butterface is a ghoulish coke head these days, he seems to have gotten smaller and scrawnier.

No. 287227

Samefag I am not friends with her anymore. Also I don’t do drugs or drink anymore.
I do not recommend cheating!

No. 287262

i would beat my hypothetical boyfriend/husband if he ever cheated on me

No. 287321

My ex cheated on me and then left me to be with that woman. Moved in with her straight away and acted like I should be happy for him? Because he found love! It was sickening. I felt all the usual feelings, betrayal, like a fool, blindsided by it tbh. Not being mean but scrotes always love to claim that men cheat because you let yourself go or because you werent fucking enough. We were. And this woman wasn't what you'd call a typical 'upgrade' She also came with the baggage of having young kids and this guy was totally against having kids. It didn't add up but I didn't say anything because he was smitten and he'd read into that as me being jealous. I was just confused. She ticked alot of boxes on things he doesn't want in a partner. Whatever, a cheat is a cheat and I wasn't going to wrack my brains as to why he chose her.

Before I had time to move out of our place properly he decided to spend the odd night back at our place too. He had been staying with her at firts and they were seemingly inseperable so I wasn't expecting it. I wasn't delighted about it. It was awkward trying to just act normal and not offload my anger. Well he ended up initiating sex with me one night. I didn't say no. The pain was so fresh that I just wanted to prove to myself that he'd cheat on her too. In a way it felt validating. Like it proved hes a cheat through and through and he would've cheated on anyone at any point just because he sees an oppurtunity. We slept together maybe 3 more times and I moved away. My head was a mess.

Time passed. I looked him up a lil while ago. Did some proper snooping and found a profile of his where he says he and this woman are open to swinging. Well I guess now I know what her mystery appeal was. I still think the few nights with me had to be behind her back tho. There was an issue around that time where she'd call him crying during the nights that he stayed at our place. I think she was paranoid that he'd cheat. Well he did and now you're allowing him to cheat some more to keep him? He was always a bit oversexxed but I used to put my foot down and say no to kinky shit that went too far like that.

I never thought I'd have such a messy/trashy story to tell. I usually have fairly drama free relationships and break ups. That was a whole gross mess in the end. I got tested for stds twice over to be safe. I was clean. Hes still the last person I've slept with. I've taken a loong ass break from dating. It was all too much

No. 287332

This is so messy anon, glad it's all behind you now. This kind of experience is hard to recover from. The nerve of him cheating on you and still coming back to sleep at your place every now and then, and expecting you to be happy for him??? I feel bad for the other girl too, in a way of course she should have known what she's getting, staying with a cheater; but then it kinda seems for me as an outsider reading your story that he's chosen someone who will have much harder time saying no and leaving him (because of her baggage) than an independent person like you; and such person would be most likely to accept "solutions" like open marriage or swinging (as she did).

No. 287726

My bf told me, basically, that he'd cheat on me without hesitation of he met a girl who has his ideal body (basically covered in tattoos). I was hurt, then I realised how pathetic it was, and that he wouldn't have a chance with a girl like that anyway kek.
I'm considering leaving, and if I do I'm totally gonna go for a hot girl with tattoos if i meet one who I click with. I actually have charisma unlike him.

No. 287733

Is he heavily tattooed himself?

I have some and the only time I don't run away from men who want to approach me using muh tatts as a conversation starter.. is when they have plenty of them too. If its a shared interest thats fine and you can compare artists and experiences. Its not so cool when untatted men just want to get a one sided tour of your work because they think its hot.

Hes a shithead either way and should be dumped, without hesitation.

No. 287743

As a women with tattoos, moids that try to talk ink are red flags. You should leave and find you a better women anon than that shit head dude. Kek

No. 289431

Got cheated on recently by my 'gf', she told me she needed space to heal…from what?! She made out drunkenly with her friend and told me shit happens then told me she loved me and not her in the same breath. She still talks to this girl even though this girl has a boyfriend. I hope I can heal and get over her ass quickly.

No. 315425

>How strongly do you feel about cheating?
i hate it its the most childish thing to do even tho most people do it even when they love their partner.
>Would you dump a partner immediately if they did it once, regardless of how in love you were with them?
No just because I feel lonely but if I had multiple guys around me waiting yes.
>Would you sweep it under the rug even if it was a regular occurrence?
>How much blame do you place on the person they cheated with (assuming they knew they were taken)?
I almost got in a fight because of that whore
>Have you ever cheated or been cheated on?

No. 315443

My ex would accuse me of attempting to cheat on him because a male friend of mine liked me at the time, then I uncovered that he was searching up random girls that added him on social media to see if he could get any of them and trying to flirt with 40 year old women behind my back because those were the only ones that talked to him.
I dumped him immediately and the male friend of mine asked me out, although I rejected him I made sure to make my ex see us hang out a few times just so he'd get even more mad.

No. 403648

My opinion on cheating is its fine and always understandable/permissible if the woman does it, but men who cheat should be castrated.

No. 403677

For all sexualities or…?

No. 411086

Please come to the American Midwest. I need you

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