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this. not having to do a 9-5 grind, being a nurturing mommy/wife, making nice homemade stuff, pretty outfits/aesthetic…cute!
having no financial padding if marriage goes south so you have to move back with your parents/gold dig/stay in a fucked marriage, being expected to love everything about motherhood with little thanks, being heavily scrutinized subtlely or outright if your looks start to go south from all the pregnancies/aging, not having much going for you other than looks/motherhood…….not very cute!!!!
you may have more options than you think OP
Have to agree, I don't think anything is wrong with being staying home to take care of the house or kids, but I hate the tradfem rhetoric that some people try to talk up, especially the men who think it's a woman's 'natural' state to be subservient.
I don't see a reason to cling to the 'traditional woman' banner, start a thread on home keeping if you want to talk about that stuff. As long as you exercise some responsibility (don't be obviously lazy or take advantage, make sure you're in a stable relationship before you combine finances) and don't feel the need to push your lifestyle on other women then do whatever you want, I support it 100% and I think it can be a really great environment for kids to grow up in.
Also, with majority of women in workforce, the wages of men are rarely good enough to even alow you be a "traditional".
Unless you live in, like, Scandinavia (lucky fucks), you got little to no chance of finding a prince charming that:
a) is rich enough to let you be trad fem
b) is stupid enough to pick YOU in particular be that trad fem - remember, rich studs have options. And did not become rich by being stupid.
Lets face it, if you find yourself on chans, instead… i don't know, being gainfully employed or super hot, you are not what men call "a good catch".
But hey, you can try. And remember to document your adventures for posterity.
>Yo dawg, i heard you wanted to be part time trad fem and stay at home and raise family. So i put some part time work in your trad fem so you can trad fem while part time work while you trad fem.
Whats the point of going "trad-fem" if you just end up working some pink ghetto job and never being at home?
Just go for proper career and leave the brats at daycare. Part time work is waste of time, as you don't get to do your home duties or get a proper wage.
If/when we could swing it, I would kill to be a housewife. Hubby and I want no kids, so it'd be a carefree life of wonder. Sadly, I wont be doing that as hubby most likely won't make more than $45,000 a year in his field for a while, so it's much less a stress for him financially if I contribute until we have a lot more saved. >>66818
This, it just proves how much people who push tradfem are motivated by misogyny even though they insist it's not. I also love these contradictions.>women's focus should be more on children and the home, it's just what's natural, their brains are more wired for it than men. they shouldn't prioritize careers as much as men.>men are the true victims of sexism! women get unfair preference in custody battles!>women are shallow gold diggers! the more money you have, the more likely they'll want you!
Like, you can't say that women are naturally the ones meant to parent more then complain when a judge thinks they're the more fit parent. Or say they should just be supported by a man instead of being independent, then complain when money is an important factor in choosing a partner to them. You're butthurt because now you're the one being fucked by the very logic you use to control women.
exactly, these particular types of men just literally hate women, plain and simple, which is why women can never win in their eyes no matter what they do. they hate women for being independent and they hate women for trying to make codependence on men less risky by trying to protect themselves with laws or money. it would seem that the only way to please this lot is to both be completely subordinate and give up everything you have with no safety net or backup plan, but women like that are still victims of abuse, if not even more likely to be victims of abuse than most anyone else.
i honestly think that most men are not like this at all, and i wish that the word misogyny wasn't so watered down by libfems and was instead reserved to palpable intense hatred exhibited by men that hate women no matter what.
I'm sorry anon. Are there any hobbies that you've always been interested in starting? That could give you something enjoyable to do when you have some downtime. Is there anywhere beautiful where you live that you could bring your child and take nice long walks?
I'm just unemployed right now so I know my situation is in no way comparable to yours since you actually have responsibilites, but I always find taking long walks and also reading help me pass the time and not be so depressed when I'm stuck at home all day.
As someone who used to be a """"homemaker"""" (involuntarily), it puts a lot of strain on the relationship. The person working will harbour resentment towards you because you do nothing but 'laze around' all day and they have no concept of how hard cleaning up everyone's messes and keeping the place tidy can be because in their mind it 'only takes ten minutes' and 'what did you do the rest of the day? Nothing.' all your hard work is constantly disparaged because you don't make any money and are therefore little more than a trophy or a pet to them. Yet whenever you say you're leaving, they suddenly remember all the good things you do for them. My bf used to remind me that he pays for everything, how I should be grateful, etc every ten minutes.
No thanks, I'd rather live in my own flat and only have myself to clean up after.
>>67829>Like, what if I don't go as much as I think I will?
Nothing will happen or change because you wouldn't be paying for said contract. Do it.
I believe you when you say childcare is really time-consuming and you don't have much time for hobbies outside of reading or gaming.
But how is it exactly depressing? Do you actually mean that you're just tired of the boredom and monotony of everyday tasks?
Maybe a little side job would be a nice change of pace for you, but I would wait until your kid is older and starts going to school in the daytime. I have to do cooking, cleaning, and running errands for my household while working 40 hrs a week (minus a child) and it's so fucking stressful. And because I don't pay rent specifically, though I front utility bills and big household purchases, my partner sometimes doesn't appreciate my contributions and implies he has a fuller load just because rent is the major bill he pays.
Couldn't imagine throwing a small child into the mix with the workload I have. Don't do it yet anon, you'll regret it and wish for these days back.
Maybe it's less that men never considered the consequences of having a stay at home wife, but that they consider it their right to be extra critical in that situation because of the fact that they feel they're working more. I think some men get satisfaction out of being nasty to their spouses, and knowing they can get away with it.
And hey, society completely backs them up via hinting that domestic chores and childcare are easy as shit.
they claim they want traditional housewives and in the same breath drag women for being leeches who 'use men for their money.' Which…yeah in that situation, your wife and children need your money to survive. You can't fault them for that. That's literally what you are asking for. (Women can't win no matter how they play. Breaking news.)
> society completely backs them up via hinting that domestic chores and childcare are easy as shit
And then they wonder why some women don't desire that life? My mom was an incredible stay at home mom who gave me and my sibling the best childhood/adolescence imaginable. I love and admire her more than anybody in the world. My father though? Never thanked her. Never appreciated her. Made constant demands and she complied without complaining. Their relationship dynamic led me to decide at a very early age to never get married or have kids, and I've never wavered from that. Unfortunately in a lot of cases it's a thankless job. People don't realize it's not just 'throw a load of laundry in and then sit and watch the Real Housewives.' It's so much more than that, and it breaks my heart that people don't recognize it for what it really is.
Make it 40 years instead of 20 and you have exactly what happened to my mother. She landed herself a man that made good money and got left home at 19 and after 45 years of a shitty, broken marriage he just up and vanished one day. I think he might be dead. Either way, my mom has little to no work experience and now barely makes ends meet by cheating the home healthcare system. She chose to be a stay at home leech instead of doing anything for herself and now she's elderly and bugging me to help her find divorce lawyers. Just me. Not her 40 year old children that she's been shown to love and care about more through my entire life.
Their marriage is the sole reason why I never wanted to get married for the longest time, and why I resented the idea of a traditional stay at home mom up until very recently.
I have a domestic personality and I enjoy taking care of kids (I worked with them) but I'm not gonna do the traditional wife thing. Maybe for a couple of years after we have kids, just so they have a decent start but not permanently. It won't be the biggest deal if I do end up a housewife but god forbid I end up that dependent on another human being. I like working.
We're both very traditional, and very happy this way. I don't have kids, but I make the house cozy and snug for my husband, do laundry, cook meals (on weekends we do that together because we like cooking together) play games, go hiking, all stuff that regular couples do. I just don't have to work. I like knowing how to mix drinks and make his favorite food and things like that. I'm not religious at all. I just love doing nice things for him. He brings me little presents, flowers, leaves poems on the pillow for me, takes me on surprise vacations. We're not rich or anything, he just likes to make me feel special.
We've been married since high school (seven years now) and the lifestyle suits us.
You'll even have at least half of your "traditional" buddies turn on you for being a "single mother" afterwards, especially the men. It's the relationship equivalent of having $25 in the bank and no insurance. If everything goes right sure you'll live, but if even a minor thing goes wrong everything will.
The only thing you'll have left is family. If he's abusive he'll try to cut you off eventually and they could pass away or be struggling themselves. Most people's families can't/won't support an adult woman and her children forever either. Especially if they looked down on it and warned you from the beginning.
>>72940> most guys these days
lol, it was never a matter of maturing, it was just being forced into expectation.
do you really think dudes in the 50s going bowling and drinking with their friends after work while the woman took care of everything is a sign of maturity?
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My dream is to be financially comfortable while I stay home and my husband makes money from home without having to work for too many hours in a day. He'd make money and I'd care for the newborns. We'd both take care of the house and homeschool the older children. The rat race sucks. I want to have a family and a situation where we can spend most of the day enjoying one another. We could go on field trips and give our children excellent experiences. I wouldn't feel isolated and overwhelmed trying to care for older children and a newborn. My husband wouldn't be stuck away from his family all day.
Of course, none of this is really possible. If it was, most people would be doing this.
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Socialism has nothing to do with it.
If you think Scandinavian countries practise socialism you're wrong. They are instead market economies, not planned economies.
Im so tired of people thinking we're socialists. We'd be standing in bread lines if we were. Mind you we (Sweden) have been in decline for the past decade or so with crippling taxes and migrants.
You'd think our feminist foreign policy would keep toxic masculine cultures out but I guess not.
Also we don't have traditional families all that often, what we do have are great maturnity leave laws for men and women which is nice.