/g/ - girl talk

We already have a thread for women who don't leave the house and devote themselves to their man kek
>>>/g/296708

There's this weird idea in progressive circles that stay at home wives are scrote worshipping doormats with no ambition. But I think that running a home is more like being the CEO of your family: it's just that instead of managing employees you're managing your husband and kids. Lots of housewives are the ones who wear the pants in their relationships!

There's also the idea that most tradwives are white and possibly racist. But on a global scale that's not true, most women who embrace this lifestyle are not white. Minority housewives are just left out of the online conversation for some reason. Even Google images has trouble bringing up pictures of housewives who aren't white, it's weird. Maybe it's because in countries where being a housewife is the norm the label isn't as relevant since everyone is doing it.(bait)

>>385444
This has to be bait.
>being the stay at home property of your husband is totes empowering uh uh because you're the girlboss of your little shitlets! having a bank account is icky and hard, no girl wants to do that!
This thread is retarded and you should feel bad.

>>385444
"CEO of your family" with no benefits of being an actual CEO or employed. Okay.

>>385444
>most women who embrace this lifestyle are not white
Lol yeah, billions of ethnic women are stay at home wives due to being brought up in shitty patriarchal cultures/religions that don’t give them a choice in the matter. This is clearly bait.

>>385444
you are retarded lmao. your husband relying on you for everything is not ‘wearing the pants’

Stay at home partner to my fiancé, but not trad. I make money from home on the side doing what I really enjoy, but it takes very little time out of my week. All of my money goes into my own separate bank account. Sometimes it’s spent on groceries or stuff for the house, but most of it by far goes into savings.
He works full time, mostly remote, and pays all of the bills, pays for dates, etc. He puts money into various investments, retirement savings, and then I have a credit card to spend as I need.
I do all of the meal planning and cooking and most of the day to day house cleaning. He does his laundry, yard maintenance, and anything “traditionally masculine” like repairs, taking out the trash, building things, etc. Our equally shared responsibilities are pets, the garden, and our chickens.
Mixed race couple, neither of us are very religious but his family is Buddhist so we have some more cultural practices we follow. We spend a significant portion of the day together since he works from home most of the time and it works well for us. No purity culture, no desire to have 6+ kids we just want 2 or 3.

I think the only negative stereotype we would really fit in would be I do think he wears the pants in our relationship. But that’s something I don’t have a problem with, I personally prefer my partner (male or female) to take more of a lead in my relationships. I just haven’t previously felt comfortable with my past partners to let them lead as much as I do my fiancé.

>>385457
What do you mean by him wearing the pants? Like he gets a final say on the big decisions? Overall your situation sounds pretty comfortable and nice

Not quite there yet but it's my ultimate goal. Also not trad but I'm similar to >>385457
I'm in college and work minimal part-time (~15 hrs), my bf works full-time at a remote tech job. He pays for everything but my car note and the occasional meal. I also have his credit card kek. I do most of the chores and cooking but I find that preferable over working full-time.
We both want kids but I told him it's not happening until we can afford a house, child expenses, and I can be a full SAHM. He's a bit of a workaholic and always tells me it's because he wants to give me the life I deserve which I find very cute.
I recognize there's so many ways this could go wrong- if he was stingy with money, didn't have a high-paying job, was resentful of our difference in working hours, or became abusive, I would be in a really bad place. I've been growing my own savings separate from his so I could support myself for a while in an emergency. Also working on a degree as a back-up and doing some freelance work for my field on the side. I think you need to have one of the rare emotionally stable, career-driven moids for this to work out well.
That's also why I think glorifying the lifestyle like those trad tiktok women or >>385444 are bad, it takes a good amount of privilege and sense of self to not end up in an unsafe situation. My bf and I started out with equal-paying jobs and I started working less and less as he earned more- young women with no plans or ambitions beyond finding a rich man to support their NEETdom are ripe for being taken advantage of and getting stuck in a bad relationship, always have an exit plan.

Great. Just what lolcow needs.

im a stay at home wife and i wouldn't recommend it. my husband uses the fact that he's the primary earner to "win" every single argument and emotionally manipulates and gaslights me constantly. on top of that im isolated from my friends and family and have no support system because i moved to be with him. never do what i did unless you're really desperate or its temporary and you're getting something out of it like a savings account or free school or you're really incapable of working because of physical or mental illness. moids are not capable of unconditional love like women are and hold every bargaining chip they can over your head until you want to kys

>>385447
It's not bait. Who says a housewife can't have a bank account? Who says the wife is the property of the husband? Who says the wife can't be a lesbian?

Personally, I think a housewife who is subservient to the breadwinner is bound to be inefficient. The breadwinner doesn't know all that is happening at home so how can they make good decisions about housekeeping?

>>385450
An actual CEO has no time to raise her kids and has to hire a nanny. A CEO's children get raised by strangers who have no stake in their future.

>>385509
It sounds like you just have a bad husband and you should probably divorce, tbh. I am also a stay at home wife but I have a support system and my guy does whatever I tell him to. Our arrangement works great and I really appreciate being able to be there for our kids.(bait)

>>385442
That's one disgusting ai generated image

This passage from the book Hood Feminism really resonated with me, although I think sticking tightly to gender roles is dumb. It is true that there is not much difference between having a job and homemaking if you are serious about building a happy household with lots of kids.

>>385521
Imagine seeing a woman tell about how she's in a financially abusive relationship and try to warn young women and all you have to say is "Well that's on you! MY NIGEL is not like that! You should divorce btw."

>>385521
>Who says the wife can't be a lesbian?
Why are you bringing lesbians in this? Most married lesbian couples I know both work to combine incomes, and the ones who do adopt kids go back to the workforce when the kids are old enough. Being a stay at home wife is regressive and an unequal dynamic regardless of sexuality. Go find a libfem website to talk about this on.

>>385538
Yeah, and before she goes back to the workforce one of the lesbians is a stay at home wife. Staying at home doesn't have to be a permanent thing for it to count.

And it's not necessarily risky for the stay at home partner. Consider a scenario where she comes from a wealthy family that is willing to support her if things go south in her relationship. Or a situation where the working partner is wealthy, the couple is married and no prenup was signed. Or a scenario where the stay at home partner could easily get a job if she needed one to survive because of her education, her connections or whatever else.

Being grossed out by stay at home parents shows stark ignorance about the realities of motherhood. If both parents are busy with work all day, who's going to help the kids with their homework? Who's going to plan the meals to make sure everyone stays healthy? Who's going to plan activities that don't involve screens so that they don't get sent pictures of goatse at 6 years old?

>Just become a CEO and hire people to do the mom stuff
I know one girl from a wealthy family who was raped by hired staff because the nasty scrote thought if he impregnated the family's teenage daughter he could blackmail them for money.

>libfem websites
Those are full of troons.

I want to hammer in the fact that for many people, the choice to be a stay at home mother is more about the kids than some sort of belief in scrotal supremacy. To illustrate my point, let me regale you with the story of something that I just went through.

So I dropped my baby. It was the kind of fall that could have happened to anyone. Our house has small steps between certain rooms and I misstepped while carrying my daughter. We both took a tumble and she fractured her leg.

We went to the ER and stayed there all night while they did tests. They didn't give her painkillers, offer some sort of crib where we could put her for naps since co-sleeping is dangerous or offer me a breastpump. Me and my scrote stayed up all night with a baby who was howling in pain and hunger, unable to latch to my breasts because of stress or pain or something.

When a baby comes to the ER with an injury, CPS is automatically notified. Because we just got past the newborn stage and we have no village, part of the house looked like a disaster zone. So what did we do? Me and my scrote stayed up all day and all night again, cleaning. We have a velcro baby who refuses to be put down and her injury makes it impossible to "wear" her so it was one of us cleaning while the other was being her couch. I just spent three days without sleep because she doesn't sleep through the night yet and I was doing the night shift the day before this fucking bullshit happened.

Can you imagine what this would have been like if we both worked? What if we both had careers and we were trying to juggle multiple kids when this happened?

>but maternity leave!
In America, not all jobs offer that. There are career women who are unable to stay home with their kids for any length of time.

>Why does your house have stairs? That's not safe for a baby!

Being able to pick out the layout of your house is a luxury. Some people can't afford homes with no stairs and there are cities where none of the good neighborhoods have homes that are fully child safe.

The modern status quo where two parents are expected to work and take care of kids at the same time with no help is unnatural and it is insane that people just accept it. No shit birth rates in the West are down the toilet.

>>389900
you bumped this dead bait thread just to post your cope? Kek. Somehow SAHMs never ask themselves the question “why is it me and not my nigel who is expected to give up their career?” Past the breastfeeding stage it shouldn’t matter if you actually married a unicorn like all married anons claim.

One way ticket to being seriously fucked when he leaves you for a younger woman. Buy your own property and work your own job, never let a man control your fate.

>>385482
>We can't afford a house
>Yet I refuse to get a job which would help towards that goal

Nona please tell me you're having a laugh

>>389904
Nta but I don't want to work and want to spend all day at home and with children.

>>389916
if moid: kys
if woman: you are a traitor to all women

>>389916
Nonnie in all honesty, what are you gonna do if the relationship doesn't work out?

>>389921
Her Nigel is a unicorn nonny he would never pull any moid antics. Sorry to those other women who get mistreated by scrotes but she’s different

The idea of being a stay at home wife is scary, but I think if I ever have kids it's going to be a (temporary) inevitability. My main fear is that if I stay home to raise my hypothetical kids then the blank space in my CV is going to severely reduce my chances of being independent later in life. My mum was a stay at home mum through most of my life and I think she really lucked out by getting a job and becoming a manager after my youngest sister was in her early teens

>>389916
also nta but same

>>389904
In my case Nigel has a really good job. If it was the other way around he would be the stay at home parent although honestly, he doesn't read the baby's cues nearly as well as I do so I would be a little worried. There's just something about scrotes and babies.. even when it's their kid, bonding almost always seems harder for them than it is for mothers.

>>389900
I know you're going to get shit on for this but we have a similar situation. We have a decent house, okay neighborhood, not a great city for sure, but neither of us are exceptional anyway. Life for the average person is a constant climb. Also most cases where there's enough stability people are late 20s or 30s but what's stopping a single woman from getting a bachelor's degree while staying at home initially?