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No. 157198
>>157192I have male sockpuppet "assistant" for outfoxing sexist scumbags in a work setting. If they won't deal with me fairly, my "assistant" who is very explicitly Mr So and So takes over, and bam, suddenly there's rapport and respect and the asshole client finds the werewithal to actually be respectful! Plus my sockpuppet guy can actually be blunt and straightforward and not risk getting an epic mantrum in response kek
It's done wonders for my stress levels and has made managing energy vampire clients so much easier. Highly recommended if you deal with clients through email, especially from "trad macho" cultures with a lot of sexist baggage. Be sure to pick an old-school Boomer name - think the oldest maths teacher in your school when you were age 7-10.
No. 157211
>>157192If I'm approached by rando men I just play deaf, I act like I don't see or hear them.
I once pretended to be autistic when an older man started talking to me and it had taken me a minute to realise that he was actually creeping. He still wanted my phone number after I'd put on this whole loud talking monotone tard act… that's when I knew I had to just start blanking guys like that altogether.
No. 157245
>>157198That is fucking brilliant.
This shit happened to me all the time in a job I had involving some technical stuff. Once they heard my voice, they'd start asking for 'someone in charge'. Bitch, I'm in charge.
One day I got annoyed and asked point blank 'Are you asking for someone else because I'm a woman? I'll have you know I'm the most knowledgeable person here.' and they got all flustered kek.
It's tough. When you stand up for yourself, you could be in danger. Even when in public, calling someone out for being a creep doesn't always elicit any type of response from the crowd.
Do you guys carry pepper spray or similar self defense tools? I know they're not technically legal to carry but fuck it.
No. 157247
>>157211What do you do when they inevitably get angry because you're "ignoring" them? Moids are so forceful and disrespectful that they will confuse actual deafness for ignoring them, so I don't really think you even could pretend enough to where it'd make 100% of them just fuck off.
I'm autistic and shy, so I usually just ignore them much like you do, but sometimes they say something like "hey, I'm talking to you," and I either try to walk faster (if I'm not sitting down when they do it) or awkwardly say "please stop" or something. It's a lot easier to deal with if it's just "smile, you look beautiful," but when they start actually trying to hit on me, I don't know what to do and I kind of lock up sometimes.
No. 157252
>>157247I just keep ignoring, once I make up my mind to block them out they can make a scene if they want but I'm sticking to my own plan.
Maybe it's because I give off a different vibe (like I'm not the most feminine presenting woman so I do wonder if that plays a role) but I haven't had any man get angry when I blank them. They usually take the L and leave.
No. 157261
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It's pretty easy for me because I have a resting bitch face and I'm big for my frame, men tend not to approach me as a default cause I don't appear to be an easy or desirable target. Many of them are intimidated by me and I like that. I always look like I've got someplace to be, which most times is true. I've had the odd idiot follow me to my car or try to get my attention in passing, but that's when I whip out the old "Sorry, I'm married." (I'm not). It helps to have a placeholder ring on your finger. If need be I raise my voice and ask "Do we have a problem?" enough so it turns heads and alerts people that there's a man giving me trouble.
Falling short of general demeanor, I act ignorant and pretend I don't know what these fucking moids are on about. I pretend I didn't hear them or act like I'm in a hurry and can't chit chat.
I don't really deal with moids at my current job so I probably don't have relevant advice. One time I got a perverted moid pretty good but it's a specific scenario. I worked with this sexist moid at a clinic in a past job. The first thing he and this stupid pickme admin bitch did on my first day was show me a video of a topless, roided out bodybuilder with bolt-ons, and I foolishly didn't go to HR–it was a shit test in hindsight. This moid always cracked sexist comments and jokes (that I felt pressured to let go of given the all-men blue collar culture we serviced at our station) so much that even the male PA verbally disciplined him a few times for unprofessionalism. Sexist moid didn't have a supervisory role yet in the morning when it was just me and him in the clinic he'd try to micromanage me. Like get me to do a bunch of cleaning jobs that he could have tasked himself if he thought they were so dire, but the clinic was pretty clean. I was just a woman with idle time however, and that drove him up a fucking wall because he wanted me to WORK by dammit. One morning the fucker had the audacity to confront me and berate me about the quality of my work over a petty disagreement we had several months prior, the bastard damn near gave me a panic attack cause he had no right to make me feel like I was doing a shit job when the PA we both reported to didn't have an issue with me. I was alone, he wouldn't have dared pulled that stunt in front of the PA. He made me HUG him after!
Fortunately, for all that he levied himself as some lighthearted, toxic positivity dude in front of people…at his core he was a fucking incel: as short as me (5'3), ex-fatty with a chip on his shoulder, ugly asian, pervert personality, likely small dick, etc cetera. Never got himself a woman that would smash him in the year I worked there. He desperately orbited the chicks in admin who humored his antics but they didn't really want him either.
As my retaliation, I'd show him my Tinder dates and talk about the fancy dinners I went on and how much sex I got to have. Which was true at the time before I found my current bf. The stupid moid knew he couldn't feasibly call me out or go to the PA cause he was the one on thin ice for being an inappropriate little pervert. But oh man, he SEETHED underneath! He'd get this irritated look whenever I brought up the night prior's escapades. For one thing, I could tell he thought I was too fat to deserve dinner and dates–cause he trimmed up and yet that didn't help his dating game at all cause he's a disgusting shit. Secondly, how DARE I get free dinner and sex from men I wasn't even planning to be serious with, don't I know women play him precisely like that?!
It made him so angry inside, and it was so delicious. I never got reprimanded, I beat him at his own stupid fucking game. I'm surprised he didn't cry.
But be careful if you fight fire with fire. This beta manlet was incapable of real violence, other men could turn violent if you strike too many of their nerves.
No. 157264
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>>157245Where I live pepper spray isn't legally allowed either so I've been thinking about buying one of those sprays that spray blue ink in the face of your attacker, they're the only legal alternative in emergency situations. It blinds your attacker for a little bit and the ink stains the skin for a few days, so the attacker can easily be identified te following day.
I know some girls who carry pepper spray anyway though. I mean, fair enough honestly, I'd rather get a fine too because I defended myself than get raped and possibly killed.
No. 157293
>>157274>you should smile more! >oooh why the long face? let me see you smile!barf!
tbh my resting bitch face hasn't helped me very much
No. 157373
>>157264Thanks anon! I didn’t know this existed. Hopefully it’s available in my country.
I usually carry around a small utility knife. I would never use it in a confrontation though, it would probably just agitate the scrote. But if push comes to show, I’m prepared to stab my attacker in the eye with it. Or their ballsack.
No. 157378
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There seems to be a trend in customer service of middle aged men asking me questions, and when I give them a competent answer they get angry. I work in a tea shop and get a lot of boomers asking me things because they’ve never really thought about just how many types of tea there are because tea is a ‘feminine’ thing and they’ve never bothered to step outside their trad echo chambers. Even though they’re the ones asking me questions whenever I give an actual answer they get so defensive and usually scoff or try and grill me more. It’s such a persistent pattern within all my other jobs too and I have no idea what they gain from trying to tear me down because I know which region in India our tea is sourced from. I’ve asked a lot of my female friends who also work in customer service if they get this a lot and they’ve all said yes. It’s fucking mind boggling to me how insecure men get over some woman’s knowledge on something they don’t even fucking care about.
No. 157667
>>157457Good! If it's something you're actually interested in doing and understand you will have to search for junior/entry level roles, you'll do fine.
You learn a lot more outside of classes, so I recommend it if you are willing to put in that extra work and make it your life for a bit. It's frustrating work, when you first learn something knew it's like, "WTF AM I DOING???", but not nearly as hard as I expected.
Really, you are learning a new language. So if you've ever had to learn a new grammar concept in a second language before- it's really similar. The more you do it, the easier it gets.
No. 157668
>>157488Well I'm talking to them as a peer instead of as a client who I have to make happy.
Literally, "Excuse me?" or, "Please don't talk to me that." You just can't say it like it's a joke or playfully and let them know you don't find it funny.
No. 158662
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>>157192seconded. i have a semi formal-1940's/50s inspired style and men leave me alone. natural matreials, classic leather shoes, tilted hats etc. and it works miracles. they just stare sometimes.
on the other hand not many men are interested in me at all. maybe i am too eccentric for their tastes
or just too ugly, slightly pudgy face here No. 158672
>Resting bitchface>Grey rock and ignore>No apologizing >Be as cold as possibleThey might seethe over it but at least you're left alone and men consider you more of a rival which still sucks but it's a hell of a lot better than most of the other options available. I work in a male dominated field so I'm just desensitized to most of their bullshit at this point and don't feel bad about being a bitch.
>>157211Kek I remember your story from some old thread, I still think about it every now and then. It was a brilliant strategy.
>>158670It has literally zilch to do with your looks, anon. You could be the ugliest pig in the world but if a moid thinks he has a chance with you because you look vulnerable he'll go for it.
No. 158715
Give as little as possible emotion back. Moids get off on any reaction you give bc it just confirms the 'hysterical' shit, and any attention is good attention to them. Have a few phrases memorized for when theyre trying to get to you. One of my favs is "Im not interested in this conversation anymore". Practice speaking from your belly but at room volume, with little emotion.
If you have any little moid family members and theyre harrassing you physically, get physical back, moidlets that do that shit never learn any other way.
Moid family dont pick up after themselves? Throw their shit in the trash and act innocent if they ask you about it, "maybe you left it at a friends house?". Theyll start being more careful about leaving shit laying around.
Dont feminize (bleached hair, nails, lip fillers, etc). If you like how it looks then ok, but no matter your intention, if you arent already naturally pretty then moids will pick up on you as an easy target.
No. 158723
>>158680For one, feminism is a pretty broad term nowadays, and you never know what someone exactly thinks feminism
is when you talk to them. Also, men are usually interested in upholding male power hierarchies, even if it's subconscious and not something they'd admit to, so anyone speaking out against the status quo makes them feel uncomfortable. They often either have to admit to themselves that they do see women as less deserving of some rights and positions, and have to work on the cognitive dissonance with their self-image as a "good guy" or they do see women as rivals for those positions, and that also bring out negative feelings because of ingroup-outgroup conflict.
Feminism is way too sensitive of an issue for workplace chitchat. Usually people just stick to slogans.
No. 158727
It's hard to deal with men irl that you
have to interact with, like at school or work, but I simply ignore anyone who approaches me on the street. They're usually just looking for some kind of emotional response from you, don't give it. If they follow you, get in a crowded area and call for help. Don't reply to scrote bait online either. It's all a stupid cry for attention.
>>158687>>158723I made the ginormous mistake of bringing up feminism at work one time when we were talking politics (coworkers are mostly young/liberal) and I could immediately tell everyone was uncomfortable. Even other female coworkers said the standard "I just don't think feminism is needed anymore, we have equal rights now teehee" comments. Most people seem to think feminism = evil man hating feminazis who want special privileges.
No. 158743
>>158715>If you have any little moid family members and theyre harrassing you physically, get physical back, moidlets that do that shit never learn any other way. Holy shit, this isn't my family, but I remember when I was over at my friend's house and two of her little cousins were visiting (one boy, one girl). The little guy started testing me and bossing me around from the first minute, and they found it hilarious. They were handling him like a demigod, and the little girl, who was softspoken and polite got no attention or praise. The same friend once told me that she hopes she only has sons. Asked "why?" and she told me "oh, so he can be good at sports". I found their family so bizzare, they basically all had absent fathers/husbands, but thought that men were so great.
No. 158744
>>157404>>157547I can attest to this, wearing conservative but still looking like a boss bitch, especially when wearing black, intimidates men.
I love looking like a CEO, I wore a suit to an interview and powerwalked and people literally were saying "yes/no ma'm" when I asked for directions. I didn't even wear makeup. Just having a defiant /determined look to your eyes helped. Even more with the mask on, because now when people look at you they look straight at your eyes and go "oh shit"
No. 158751
>>157547>>158744Men are cowards who look for weak
victims.
I have had the most harassment when I was underage and when I've been ill and depressed.
It sucks because we can't always feel all strong and confident but it definitely helps to look and behave like it.
No. 159251
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>>157583I have a tinfoil that flowing fabrics/long lines in clothing subconsciously remind people of high fashion models, not matter whay you actually look like, which is associated with high status, which is associated with money, i.e. subtext, she will not response in my half ass street PUA negging. Again this is my tinfoil only
No. 159348
>>159252Nta but I love this lewk.
Anon, if you have a style inspo board or anything, can you share?
No. 159444
>>159348Major OT No I don't but my rules are: no makeup except for maybe a little concealer/mascara or a little lipstick on special occasions- keep your skin looking good with diet/lifestyle and moisturizer- clean/undamaged hair in your natural natural color. Only use conditioner on the ends of your hair, you don't actually need it on your whole head, just the lower third where it's the most damaged, other it contributes to it looking greasy.
Natural fabrics only-wool, cotton ect. No synthetics (most of them are made from
toxic chemicals that can leech into your air esp fast fashion). This is a little annoying to check the materials tags on everything but you'll get used to it. Neutral colors/natural patterns like woven fabrics vs digital printing. Fit is everything- never buy anything that doesn't fit perfectly. Flowing fabrics, long coats/long skirts. No jewelry except a few really special pieces that mean something to you or if you want, a few piercings if thats your thing. One really good everyday handbag and one small evening bag. Shoes and your bag should cost the most money cause those are two things that people subconsciously use to gauge you when they see you, and also good quality shoes and bags last muuuuuuch longer then fast fashion so you can actually wear them for 3,4,5 years. Strong preference for Made in America/Europe, korea, Japan, pretty much anywhere but China/Southeast asia. Never use fur, diamonds, or other boomer signifiers to show wealth cause it looks tacky af and primitive (at least where I live).
To circumvent the costs of this, you can thrift a lot of high fashion brands for cheapish online, but my favorite is pop-up 80-90% off sample sales for high fashion brands like Helmut Lang and Alexander Wang where they take extra inventory they haven't sold at the end of the season. Since Covid-19 a lot of these sales have gone virtual so you don't have to live in a major city to benefit. I follow a account called chicmi_official on instragram that lists a lot of sample sales in person and online. Also look around for small, independent designers that use high quality materials that you like that you can "invest" in longterm, like the way you would invest in a band or tv show. When you have multiple items of someone it really helps solidify your look and makes it less likely for you to spurge on junk purchases. Always sign up for mailing lists for independent designers and online boutiques that sell what you want and put aside 5 min a day to read them, because flash sales happen all the time and they can be pretty good.
No. 159464
>>159444thank you jesus
anon this is perfect, thank you
No. 159567
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>>157245I have this problem where on the phone my voice starts getting higher pitched, probably just nerves, but it's the worst because I think I sound like a kid and it makes misogynists even worse. Last week a supplier even lost a massive contract because he couldn't just be polite to me like everyone else on the phone with my stupid kid voice so I just cut him out of the tender.
I'm going to work on pitching my voice down but I fucking resent that I have to and that it probably won't be enough.
>>157547I have to confirm, I get so much less shit when I dress like a Greek grandma than when I wear colours or frills or even fucking band shirts (because it gives them something to open a conversation with) .
I used to have a ghostbusters tshirt my sister bought in NY for me but I knew if I had some chode yell "who ya gonna call" one more time I would end up in prison so I had to relegate it to sleepwear.
No. 159687
>>159464Glad my autism was of help to a fellow anon
I forgot to add my baseline for price point of shoes/bags should be $350-500 (or up). Obviously you're not gonna pay that much because the point is to buy it on sale, but that should be the original price point,it means the quality will be decent, will look good and last a long time. Your skincare should be decent price point too, Dr, Jart or Sunday Riley prices I can't give reqs because I only know my skin issues but the most quality your products are the less you should need to use it, and less money to spend on buying new shit all the time. IMO a lot of drugstore/sephora brands are kind of trash (except for drunk elephant and the ordinary which my friends or I had verified experience with )but a lot of it is really just a waste of your money, like Mario Badescu, shudder, but also don't kill yourself trying to buy $500 Mimi Luzon gold masks, a lot of the super expensive brands are not worth it too.
No. 163304
>>163258When you phrase it that way it sounds like FLEAs. I wouldn't be suprised if they suffered some kind of abuse or bullying that made them clam up and become weirdos.
On the other hand there's spergs who can't shut the fuck up. There's this autistic fry cook at my job who gives this other other girl there problems. Somehow he brought up wanting to move to Antarctica becuase its "grim and frostbitten" (he's obsessed with black metal). He continued to say that to survive he would eat penguins and make fried penguin sandwiches. He was a bit perplexed as to why everyone was grossed out when he said that.
He's not even the worst autist I've had as a coworker. There's also this guy who I worked with several years ago who was OBSESSED with a girl there. He was 20 she was maybe 22 or so and engaged. She was a stage actresss as well. He would go to the musicals she was in and would go on about how she looked like a Disney princess, and would make drawings/skyrim characters based off her and several other girls there. The same guy also apparently bought 400$ worth of sex toys with his first paycheck (not even a bad investment on his part- he certainly knows where his bread is buttered lol). Consequently his mom also started to confiscate his checks.
This is his deviantard
https://www.deviantart.com/xenosapient No. 163719
>>163220I agree wholeheartedly. I have a very standoffish presence around strangers because of my own trauma and it repels creeps for the most part. The ones that still try usually stop when I'm very clearly disinterested and the cat callers look away when I shoot them a look.
I've been called really scary before even though I'm a wimp with no physical presence and honestly I'm fine with it. The friends I have now are very nice and genuine and I at least know that they actually like me as a person.
No. 178037
>>157192I talk about stuff that I know for a fact they know nothing about. If you rub your smarts in their face they get intimidated and stop.
However this could backfire horrifically if they end up being the type who is totally into it, at which point you now have a new boyfriend/leg humper
No. 178044
>>178037This happened to me with my autistic strategy games, it was the worst cause I guess I was the first girl he and his friends met who played them
probably just the first one dumb enough to admit to it and I'm still trying to shake off that scrote fan club. Have to know your audience!