File: 1687223781414.jpg (85.23 KB, 564x549, 1671187202449.jpg)
No. 1612443
File: 1687226397325.jpg (184.11 KB, 1500x1500, tumblr_83fdd0ca77ab84946402cee…)
stout beers are mid. they ruined my scheduled binge drinking for this night.
No. 1612455
File: 1687227398244.jpeg (19.84 KB, 400x379, 8E6DD2BE-287A-4B90-AB92-A61A8C…)
So agitated and restless all the time. Nothing seems to work, nothing seems to help. Existence is just going to feel uncomfortable for life right?
No. 1612475
File: 1687229056221.jpeg (9.19 KB, 275x138, 183FDBA6-4DDC-42CC-90FA-FC1CD4…)
>>1612453I hope this is a joke or some pasta I’ve never encountered because this is bleak. Please get an abortion for the sake of your daughter, you’re deranged.
No. 1612491
>>1612481I'm sure it will, my friend really wanted a girl to the point she cried when she found out it was a boy. Now the kid is older and she loves him incredibly, she assured me when you have your kid it's different and you won't ever want them to be a different gender.
>>1612475The issue is not really the kid so much as my own disgust with femininity. Kid doesn't deserve death for that and I'm not going to discourage them from femininity.
>>1612482Cope
>>1612485Idk what these means but thanks
No. 1612494
File: 1687230132307.jpg (128.98 KB, 1920x1080, aladdin-disneyscreencaps.com-1…)
>>1612453>I am also disgusted by my own femininity.Then why did you get pregnant?
No. 1612507
>>1612494I mean more artificial vs biological. Pregnancy is fine and doesn't upset me, but make up and very feminine dress does. I am disgusted by a very feminine presenting woman but not a tomboy one. I'm not sure why, some kind of ingrained notion about "women" that's been there since I was a kid. Might also be an autism thing, strange things disgust me like buttoned shirts and certain types of shoes.
>>1612502Its really how you see it. I've had an abortion before so I'm not against it, but I definitely view the child as a person in my head now and an abortion would be morally wrong for me at this point. I don't plan on not accepting the child it's just the disgust reaction to feminity scares me.
No. 1612509
File: 1687231190820.gif (7.97 MB, 640x480, mupetshow.gif)
these last couple of weeks have been so entertaining, all the netbrained waste of skin and resources are appalling. Imagine being such a useless excuse of a human being and they're so easy to spot too, regurgitating:
>weird
>gross
>cringe
>okay.
>something obviously specific to guarantee attention
is incredibly pathetic I fucking love it, they all think they're different, important or worthy of something. How would it feel to be so empty of meaning and direction? When your caretakers didn't give you that oh so needed pre and post natal attention that groomweb had to raise you? When I first began using imageboards in 2006 the attention whoring was present but not to this level, this is next level, it makes me salivate. The amount of generations lost to the wired-brain-fry is fantastic, can any of you imagine them on standard social interactions? I bet they're thinking "I can order a McChicken just fine, she's insane" (in "slang" of course) but in reality it took every single ounce of subhuman strength they posses to make a simple trash food order. Repeating over and over the interaction to convince themselves that everything went "according to plan", gosh it warms me up. Can't even surpass the primal aspects of human development, out of the 5 rungs they don't posses any of them, these brains are beyond repair. I've interviewed so many of them and all of them are alike a weeks old dried up badly crafted croissant, sure it has layers but all of them are uneven and incomplete. They have their head so up their asses I cherish every. single. word. they uttered in my direction. Same here, the amount of screenshots I've accumulated this past week alone is mouth watering, if I had more free time I'd absolutely become a farmhand to see the spectrum of behaviour in a spam of an hour. As all the past adjectives that have been superimposed on me, and I've been called every name in the dictionary, still I'm always so EAGER to know what they'll come up with so I can micro-analyze it to death is given. I wish moid freud was alive so he could have his brain melted like cheese and also to be able to send him anthrax in the mail but that's besides the point. The amount of inb4s in my head are riling me up, my sociology thesis is gonna be horrendous KEK I'm so excited.
No. 1612515
File: 1687231620585.jpeg (85.02 KB, 538x1280, IMG_0304.jpeg)
I hate this so much. I saw this in a FB group called “what does it mean” and I was genuinely stumped for a second until the troons came in shrieking about how cute and funny it would have been to have “BARBIE DICK” in a movie meant for little girls
No. 1612539
>>1612534Like I said, I don't plan on pushing the kid one way or the other and I don't really want it to affect her. I won't lie I'll feel a bit sad if she's girly, because I think I'd feel alienated from her. I wish I knew how to relate to femininity in a healthy way, I've been going to therapy for this + some other issues for a while, but having a girl makes me worried and I feel a certain sense of pressure. I think there's worse afflictions anyway, and I'm not going to demand she avoid her expression of femininity for my own sake.
>>1612531I dont give a shit about your "pickme" mother, stop projecting your shit onto me
No. 1612627
File: 1687243998770.jpg (21.21 KB, 450x320, image-450w-748558456.jpg)
God I'm going to go apeshit on my best friend if she goes through with this…
She's been dreaming of getting a dog for years, so I know this is important to her and I don't doubt she would be a great owner. However, she got a second cat last fall that she was planning to breed when she got old enough - which is roughly around now and she is already being driven insane by how crazy her already high energy cat goes whenever she's in heat.
But despite that, and the fact that she lives in a small 1 bedroom apartment, she went behind all of our backs and signed herself up to adopt a rescue dog from outside the country. Both me as her friend and her family have kept telling her to be careful of those adoption agencies and that getting a dog in her current living situation is a very, very bad idea. It's not fair to neither her wallet or her pets.
No. 1612662
>>1612657This is like mini
Haikus and Other Poetry
Don’t mind me staring
No. 1612697
File: 1687251532135.jpg (9.73 KB, 275x255, 1682221196690.jpg)
Finally, I'm about to get my autism diagnosis and I won't feel like a person who was just lazy and shy like my family always tried to tell me I was, and I won't feel like an impostor and a fake
No. 1612711
>>1612677Yeah probably shouldn’t date with a vulnerable mindset. You can choose stoic caretaker type partner who is dependable but encouraging without being
toxic and controlling. Only thing they’re kinda rare.
No. 1612767
>>1612747I've thought that too, but we're part of the same friend group/circle and he's been talking about being miserable for a long-ass time before anything happened between us/before we even became friends (and needs another therapist but is reluctant to because his last one couldn't help him). I've never expected him to leave his wife, and I regret getting involved with him in that way, tbh. He was my friend, and it should've stayed that way or I should've dipped once things got complicated.
I just think he's a guy who's got deep-seated issues that need addressing urgently. It's really none of my business, but my curiosity won't fuck off.
No. 1612774
File: 1687258823612.jpeg (23.54 KB, 441x462, F4B20159-E619-4331-BE88-F70AB7…)
I haven’t drawn in months bc I have a crippling fear of inevitably making something I’m not satisfied with. I know it should just be for myself and for fun, but I open a canvas and I’m frozen because it feels pointless since so many talented people already exist and if I’m not even appreciating it who will.
It’s starting to breach into my other hobbies too; cosplay, writing, running even gaming (can’t even play my zoo building game without feeling like anything I make is shit lmao).
No. 1612779
File: 1687259173712.gif (925.45 KB, 450x277, giphy.gif)
>>1612774Make one of those sand mandala paintings you are supposed to destroy as soon as you make
No. 1612798
>>1612780Those sand paintings sound cool, I’ll have to check them out! Ty
A little bit anon, but that’s also a good idea. Will do <3
(<3) No. 1612805
File: 1687261973140.gif (2.32 MB, 540x405, 0db9586272800265ac7fef69a5329c…)
I think my mom wants to divorce my dad and it's so weird, given that I'm in my 20's and yea…
Now, he wasn't abusive or anything like that, but he just wasn't present mentally in the family and he came home drunk almost everyday. When he's sober, he doesn't talk at all, only small talk, he only talks when drunk and both me and my mom can't stand it. He also has certain phrases and gestures he says and does only when drunk, which is just annoying that we can't talk with someone sober. Doesn't help that the (borderline) alcoholic husband is so normalized where I live, so much so that pretty much every woman gets memed into "well, you should say thank God he doesn't beat you".
My mom wants to try couples consueling, but I feel like my dad doesn't care that much and doesn't admit he has a problem. It feels like I'm 14 again and I had to ne some sort of messenger for my dad when my mom didn't want to talk to him…
No. 1612846
File: 1687265535403.jpeg (95.97 KB, 828x797, 0389E970-9E44-4B95-8449-15CAB4…)
I just need to say that it pisses me off how much this dress gets hyped and Diana in general. She wasn’t as pretty as everyone says just because she had a tragic death etc her hair looks like granny hair and her face is just a normal persons face and she was skinny because of her bulimia. She’s nit some pura angel. I just can’t with people making her seem holy, she was a person with good and bad traits.
No. 1612847
>>1612834you can't help it. someone dying trying to save others, working towards a just cause endlessly, suffering in some way for others. you can't not feel the pain, and sympathy. even if it's a scrote, kek. we are just humans.
>most of them really don't deserve an ounce of respect.you can say that again.
No. 1612853
File: 1687266195211.jpg (8.26 KB, 260x275, 1628292.jpg)
i love my dad but does he need to be so apathetic towards everything
No. 1612861
>>1612846Camilla hands typed this but this time unironically
That you have Instagram/Photoshop brainrot doesn't mean someone isn't attractive dumbass. Diana was tall, had a slender figure, and had a sweet face and demeanor. She was attractive in a natural non-forced way but when you are an average 18 yo cunt with bdd obsessed with plastic surgery celebs you just don't see it. Unironically go outside and talk to actual people irl and you'll start seeing it
No. 1612864
File: 1687267358670.jpeg (584.62 KB, 2153x2153, D11A6FAB-DB27-46F9-B922-41C9B7…)
>>1612861You mean this? She just looks like a random mom seriously anon no reason to go apeshit
No. 1612871
File: 1687267749613.jpg (343.87 KB, 1439x1466, Screenshot_20230620_082957_Duc…)
>>1612864We're talking about bri'ish royals, she's a 10/10 for that double whammy of ugly population
Edit some long hair onto her with modern makeup and she'd be much cuter yes
Pic unrelated, not cute
No. 1612899
File: 1687270171702.jpeg (27.31 KB, 800x534, 32852D71-61AF-4B0A-9D14-FC245A…)
Is there something in the air today? Everyone at work was late as fuck and frazzled. Also fuck that dumbass customer making a last minute order, you ain’t gonna get it maybe learn how to prioritize and plan better.
Two of the girls i work with I think are seriously equal opportunity hires from how fucking retarded they are, wish they would just get fired already.
No. 1612904
I think I live in the worst fucking geographical location. I am right next to the road so I hear cars all the time. And yet there is almost nothing on this road that I can walk to, so I would need a car or to walk 20-30 mins in either direction. Yeah I don't currently have a bike or moped but regardless it's not peaceful because of the road. It is still countryside enough to hear birds all the time, there is a mountain behind me and in the distance, the sea is not far by car or I walk to the train station, there is a small food mart 10 seconds away and a pizza place and cafe 3 minutes away. But still I want the peacefulness of the country without the cars and the convenience of a small town or city, and I have the opposite. I am so bored. And I don't currently have any friends to hang out with, no job, and not much funds and I have been stuck. And yes I needed a break from it all but I also have plans for life and need to be on that. So I need to just be busy for the summer. And besides some camps and events this place is absolutely bland during the summer. There's an increase in tourism and a decrease in productive businesses functioning.
I am not meaning to complain because I am still lucky in a nice spot, I am young and hot and healthy, I have my cats. But I need something more, and I think that something is money so I can pursue my ambitions.
No. 1612968
>>1612965Yes. Thank you.
I cannot fucking believe this. I was keeping a eye on a item that I wanted from ebay the past fucking few days, constantly refreshing the page to see if it's been sold out, annnddd theennnnn…. when the time comes to finally call my bank, because obviously I couldn't fucking call them before today, which I would've done a long time fucking ago… the last one is sold. And…. it no longer fucking exists seriously????? Who the fuck brought it. Stupid fucking braindead scrote probably did. I fucking hate mem. They deserve NOTHING. I should've, WOULD'VE gotten it if my fucking bank wasn't so retarded and the bitches inside it that I talked to. I thought women on lolcow were retarded????? No. These bitches behind the desks of this bank is even more stupid than the cunts on here. I fucking hate life, scrotes and most nonnas. Goodnight.
No. 1612975
File: 1687275964503.jpeg (118.11 KB, 1152x711, IMG_4265.jpeg)
Why the fuck did they use the name Idalia only two years after Ida? It’s like using the name Katarina only two years after Katrina. Or Ivanka right after Ivan. Someone from the WMO needs to fired.
No. 1612993
I'm in the process of getting therapy but it's taking so damn long! I've signed up in January and I've had 2 consultations, a regular therapist is far far away. I feel so hopeless, I just want my life sorted out and find out why I have no ambition, why I'm constantly anxious, why I'm a hypochondriac, just why? I feel so stuck.
>>1612977I feel you nonna. In my mind I live in a little house near the bayou, do spells for the village people and have a husband and daughter, irl I'm a college dropout turned NEET. I just want to live in a fantasy world forever. Life sucks.
No. 1613001
File: 1687277730485.png (118.3 KB, 838x658, 1660794765855-0.png)
>almost certain my friend is avoiding me bc she's emotionally cheating on her husband with our mutual friend
>worst dyshydrosis flare up for months, still not going away even with steroid creams
>unemployed and feel slighted that the girl who replaced me is about to get paid twice as much as i did and she hasn't even been there a whole year yet (fucking hate moids they will do anything hoping to get laid)
>doubting my relationship of 4 years
>not sure i want to get married because i honestly do not really like his family and worry they probably dont like me either
>spend time with parents who are fun but even then i'm depressed because brother is obsessed with self improvement podcasters and has to constantly inject shit into our conversations and they feel like disguised insults and he keeps insulting my intelligence and the fact i am female
>my mom sometimes says stuff that implies she wants me to come back and live with them and i am worried parents dont like my bf all along and just arent saying anything as usual
death lookin real inviting these days…
No. 1613008
>>1612993i'm sorry you're facing problems getting therapy, anon. half a year, damn. it sucks when you try to steer yourself to do something to improve but it doesn't work out. i'm sorry anon, i feel so stuck too. everything is passing me by, i am a voyeur of my own life.
>Life sucks.tell me about it…
No. 1613033
File: 1687280707302.gif (1.52 MB, 275x237, 1668849854295.gif)
I hate dating apps. I'm basically being given a catalogue of men and I'm rejecting them based on the most superficial shit because if I don't I'd have to start a conversation and I don't really even know what to say. But I'm rejecting guys because they, like, work in IT, are bald, listed a religion or have boring profiles, even though none of those are actual dealbreakers. My ex who I still miss but he's a cheater so fuck him wasn't photogenic, worked in IT and was into boring normie vidya but I still love(d?) him and had a good time with him. And god knows I'm not a fucking catch myself, yet I'm judging these moids in the ways I hate being judged. Human relationships aren't supposed to work like this.
No. 1613042
>>1613029Yeah she’s right, black women especially get ire for the dumbest things online. I literally just saw a post where some rando took a creep shot of a group of black women who were wearing athletic wear and bonnets at the airport. The original post was asking ‘thoughts?’ even though it didn’t fucking matter and if they were white girls in sweatpants no one would give a shit.
>>1613033I’ve been thinking about joining an app again recently even though I’ve literally never had luck on them. All of the scrotes on there either used me for sex and got extremely rude whenever I asked for the bare minimum. I did get one boyfriend off of there who was a nice person but he had a lot of downsides; no ambition, no drive, no real hobbies, lied about going to college to me. Makes me sad because he did treat me a lot better than some of these other moids but we had no long term compatibility. The last moid I met online seemed great while texting but was a fucking loser in real life. He looked really cute in his pictures but so gross and weird in real life. I don’t think he even edited them as it was clearly him just like the gross ugly twin. I feel like the only way to truly gauge things before getting attached is in real life.
No. 1613096
>>1613023I'm not black and I don't go on lsa, yeah I've never seen it with any other group
>>1613042I saw some discourse on here where random anons were arguing about how wearing sweats or bonnets outside of your home is trashy and it felt racist and classist. race wasn't brought up but I know black women's hair takes a lot of time and they're the main demographic of bonnets so it felt like a dumb fucking argument because also who cares. it's like a hat or whatever women don't need to dress themselves up just to go to the store or some shit
No. 1613100
File: 1687284001236.jpg (7.66 KB, 258x196, images (1).jpg)
The vet office made me feel like such a shit owner yesterday.
Bubs is healthy so he only goes to the vet 2x a year for a checkup and he gets a clean bill of health every time. The practice is a hospital/rescue which is where I adopted him at 6 months.
He always shakes like a leaf and gets so scared at the office because he smells and hears other animals in distress and probably doesn't recall good memories there from being poked and prodded before. There were no other dogs waiting in the lobby so he didn't have an example or a distraction. He was also the runt and the staff even admitted when I adopted him that he was bullied within his litter. All this could be why he associates the place with bad memories, regardless. I have nary owned nor met an animal that loved going to the vet.
Well anyways, he rubbed his nose raw recently because I gave him collagen chews and he wanted to bury them in my couches/pillows around the house. The vet gave a perplexed look and questioned me about it as if I neglected my dog and locked him in a cage all day (implying it was self-harm). Next they had to give him a nose injectable but of course he struggled because they wanted to restrain him. For safety they put a muzzle on him and between two techs they kept bungling the injectable which only served to make him more scared. They kept repeating how he wasn't "socialized" the entire time. Yet he didn't snap, growl, or bark the entire time! He was just spooked. I take him to dog parks several times a week. He loves other dogs, cats, and people. He was just nervous because he knew vet=unpleasant shit going down. It was almost like they had a chip on their shoulder because he didn't remember nor like them, and that's when they used it as their in to advertise their $18/day doggy daycare to socialize my dog to their liking I suppose.
I kinda felt like one of those moms getting questioned by CPS because their ADHD kid showed up to school with a scrape on their chin and said some weird shit to a teach. Jfc.
No. 1613109
File: 1687284969166.jpg (20.42 KB, 412x415, images.jpg)
Never ask a woman her age
A Man his salary
Or a painter how they pull off JMW Turner's style.
No. 1613137
>>1613064Fyi if you have in writing that you've made it clear you want something fixed, that would be smart. Especially WATER damage, which could result in mold. I knew someone who had a nice settlement because he asked that the mold be fixed, yet it wasn't.
So, please, just WRITE in e-mail the issues you have. If you don't, it's harder to prove anything.
No. 1613148
File: 1687288468550.jpeg (41.57 KB, 646x474, 6282939033.jpeg)
Sometimes I wish there was something like a destroy/rage room next to my work. I honestly don't even think it's a thing in my country, but fuck it should be. My boss frustrates me to no end sometimes, holy fuck
No. 1613197
>>1613180I already do!! Lol. I tell her things like "well, you know how kids can be" and i don't shy away from reminding her the kid's age. But she just doesn't care like it doesn't register at all. She's already been told by the faculty to focus on her position and stop going to other classrooms (which she did mostly because she was bored af and wanted to hang around with the schoolgirl) but she just ain't having it. Like at this point i feel like she can't comprehend how a real job in the real world is (this is one of her first real work experiences, and she's had the same issue in the past were she wouldn't care about workplace rules and just do whatever the fuck she wants and talk and distract people).
If this keeps up, i might have to tell her straight up to stay the fuck back and sit the fuck down for once lmao, which i really don't want to do bc she's my friend and i just know it would fuck her up bad. I hope this kid just up and drops her forever cold turkey
No. 1613269
File: 1687302295308.gif (2.45 MB, 498x348, IMG_0332.gif)
Christ almighty. My dumb alcoholic self drank too much vodka last night and I had spicy ramen today and I’ve had nonstop burning diarrhea all day, hotter than the fires of hell. Help. Thank god for wet wipes, my poor ass
No. 1613316
>>1613137Nonny, the evening the water damage happened in November, I spent an hour and a half recording everything that happened to my insurance guy as a video, asked the troublesome neighbor if he had noticed a water leak in his bathroom (which he didn't, someone else had to come to find the source of the problem and stop the leak later), then again in written with the third party company thing in copy via email, then cleaned it all up.
Fast forward to before the Pentecostal weekend, finally a company that deals with drying up buildings after water damages came to install hot air machine in my bathroom. Since then, I'm waiting again, no fucking clue what's next.
I've been literally waiting since November 4th to finally get my ceiling fixed and install a ceiling lamp again. But because I'm the owner of my apartment, the third party company that deals with the people renting is beating around the bush with the whole shebang because the apartment is not "in their care" per say.
No. 1613330
File: 1687311207409.jpg (35.63 KB, 735x616, 1682027271251.jpg)
Mad at myself for letting my body get fat. Anachan faggotry was always the correct path for me. I hate liars, and I hate that I got too comfortable and started to believe I really could just eat like a "regular person". Either it is a conspiracy, or I have some magical body type that functions just fine on very low calories. I've accepted that I, in fact, cannot eat how a stereotypically "normal" person eats. It's fine, I barely even get hungry anyhow. Just thought I could enjoy food like all my friends, but now I know that's not the case. I fixed this shit once, I can do it again. Just sucks that this even happened.
No. 1613351
File: 1687313667964.jpg (20.9 KB, 511x340, 1d8.jpg)
Spent so much energy today that now I'm exhausted and drained, all I want to do is daydream and watch movies and I'm too tired even for that. Can't have shit smh.
No. 1613363
File: 1687315618128.jpeg (3.55 KB, 128x128, 9308AB40-6588-4A61-867E-87BE0A…)
its another self harm by being destructive day
self study tmrw morning means i get to force my body to sleep with benadryl
No. 1613364
File: 1687315643703.gif (17.88 KB, 128x128, E70D0A5D-AAFE-4B63-9990-3B09CE…)
>>1613363uploaded wrong file but oh well
No. 1613365
>>1612846That recreation of the dress and necklace is really bad.
Anyway, I agree that the dress is nothing crazy (I don't like how low it is at the top, but how long it is at the bottom, makes it looks like it's too big and riding down on her) but that dress is more about the statement than how it looks. I'm not British, but a little black dress for a royal woman in the 80s is pretty scandalous, and this was her first appearance after Charles admitted to cheating. Also she was attractive, especially for a British person (generally unattractive people) and especially for someone in the British Royal family (filled with uglies).
Also, having bulimia and granny hair isn't some moral failure and aren't necessarily "bad traits". You could've at least brought up her becoming entangled with a married man or something.
No. 1613411
>>1613399it's a mixed bag. i had
abusive LTRs in my early to mid 20s that made me not date for 4-5 years until i met the man i'm marrying in a few weeks. i still hate most men and tell him that all the time. but one of my best and longest friendships is with a man. when i read stories in the news that are fucked up i immediately think "not all men, but always a man". idk if this helps but basically just don't try, you will either end up happy alone or happy with someone and both are fine
No. 1613413
File: 1687320695914.jpg (91.24 KB, 507x507, 1548626111749.jpg)
Oh I get it, why you all hated me. You just assumed that I knew the game you were all playing, when I didn't even know one was going on.
No. 1613422
File: 1687322141355.png (2.56 MB, 2014x1261, 42rjp6.png)
How retarded do you have to be that you can't even make soup? I thought my recipe was totally idiot-proof, so condescending nobody could fuck it up!
No. 1613444
I need some help to deal with my neighbours because I'm at my wits end
>find new place, very nice looking, nice location, everything is perfect
>next to me there are two female students, it can't be that bad i think to myself
>they start getting loud AT NIGHT
>text them hey please keep quiet because i'm trying to sleep
>they apologize so it's ok
>nothing happens for a few days then they start getting loud again and again
>i text them, i even ask the landlord to talk with them he also talks with them. keep in mind this happens multiple times. he said that i should call the police if it ever happens at night
>however it seem that they decided to retaliate and instead of being loud at night they go EXTREMELY LOUD during the day like at 8 am, at 5 pm for intervals of 10-15 minutes and it's obvious they're doing it on purpose because it wasn't happening before. they make weird animal sounds, blast the music on full volume because they know i can't do shit about it then suddenly stop. i always hear them giggling
>here the law says that the police can only get involved if they're loud AFTER 10 pm not before
please… just help me i don't know how to deal with it. i tried to be very friendly with them, asked them nicely to keep quiet at night because i'm also a student, i have exams, it's a very normal thing to ask. but they decided to take their revenge on me for that and now they terrorize me throughout the day, talking with them doesn't work we already know that. should i also blast music on full volume? i'm afraid this is gonna make them worse… they act like middle school bullies who want to take their revenge so yes they could go much worse than this
No. 1613468
>>1613444You can either
A) blast music they my hate for even longer like edm, rap, country, foreign also during day time
B) use ear plugs and sound blocking headphones like sony/bose. HD to do this for 5am-7am illegal construction noise the past few weeks…
No. 1613515
>>1612207its the curse of extreme self awareness. many forms of therapy are useless against it. CBT and DBT sound great but require motivation. Id like to try EDMR and hypnosis though. self awareness is helpful but awful, its a self fulfilling prophecy anon.
My advice is to try and do at least one thing a day that it totally unlike yourself, something stupid or small you'd never do in any given situation. if you struggle finding some unknown part of yourself, try to create that part. Gaslight your own brain until you cant dissect your reasoning.
"now why would i, a rational person, do weird shit everyday because some retard on lol cow dot org said so?"
For no fucking reason anon, thats why. fuck your complicated thought processes, be the anon you never imagined becoming, dont do it to become better or just to cope, just do it because nobody will stop you
No. 1613517
>>1613463yes next time this happens at night i'm definetly calling the police
>>1613481i already have some recordings in case i'm gonna need it in the future
>>1613499i was thinking that too, the situation might escalate too much. the girls are very mean and at this point i'm a bit afraid of them
>>1613466i wish i could do that kek however i don't want to end up finding their shit in front of my door
No. 1613544
File: 1687341122490.jpeg (69.82 KB, 500x667, IMG_5283.jpeg)
>friend asks for recommendations for games specifically so 'we can get into them together' and share art and whatever
>share a few games with her that i really like from different genres to make sure she has options
>even buy her a gift card for her birthday since she was mentioning how annoying adding funds to ps4/switch is
>'thank you anon!!! i'm gonna play them, i'm so excited to talk about it with you'
>few weeks pass
>she still hasn't played them
>guess she's just busy, nbd - that's basically what she says when i bring it up too
>months pass
>still hasn't played them
>instead she's gotten into f1
>keeps trying to make me get into it with her despite the fact it's a fake 'sport' full of ugly nepo baby low-value moids who look like they've already been in a dozen crashes since birth
>keeps sending me RPF and 'laughing with me' about ABO shit
>has started writing fic for it and sending it to me to beta even though i don't fucking care and have now told her at this point that i'm not interested
>now i know all this stupid random shit about f1 moids because she won't stop talking to me about it and sending me gay porn fanfic of them
>i'd have happily listened to her fujosperg about fictional moids, but not like this
>her switch profile says she still hasn't even opened the games i recommended
>mfw
No. 1613552
>>1613546Good for you.
>>1613544You need to sternly tell her to quit sending you crap you don't want to see. What is it with anons' friends sending them their wank material?
No. 1613570
File: 1687342800230.jpg (80.65 KB, 680x680, f5753870a40ccef114a6cb88e7f485…)
Jesus christ what the fuck I was sitting on a train and some super old dude, like 80 years old, sat next to me even though there was literally like 15 or 20 empty seets around us. Then he started to wiggle in his sit, pushing his leg against mine and I thought he's just trying to make himself comfortable or something, but then I saw his disgusting wringly hand trying to smooth my thigh (I wear shorts) I thought I'm going to puke. I stood up and changed seats and I'm sitting next to some lady now. I hope this fucking scum dies, there's nothing but contempt I have for cockroaches like this, any moid that tries something like this on you is disgusting but there's something especially disgusting about an old fuck who could literally be your grandfather doing this to a strenger on a train. Fucking die cunt
No. 1613579
File: 1687343494548.gif (4.9 MB, 498x278, c5b8bc3d4b89e23fb86510416ac255…)
Getting drunk and using characterai to roleplay with a parental character as if they were my real parent to deal with my own childhood neglect issues and laughing about it because I'm so fucking funny and normal aren't i
No. 1613615
>>1613608Giant red flag, anon.
This is a man who wants you to put his wants before your own needs.
No. 1613663
File: 1687353916816.png (28.57 KB, 380x241, 1687227311129647.png)
Fucking disgusting moid posting a old lady getting beaten up. Please report.
No. 1613806
File: 1687367447095.jpg (43.91 KB, 894x800, 3e10db5628c1a1dacb7cf9eca5815c…)
I really want to buy a PC so I can finally emulate some fucking games but I don't even have the space in my room to put it somewhere. I hate my younger self for buying a macSHIT laptop (butterfly keyboard is literally falling apart as I type) instead of investing in a windows laptop or pc. My brother needs to move OUT so my sister can move OUT of my damn room.
No. 1613825
>>1613820Usually it's annoying when people offer you advice you already tried ,or they're not fully listening to you and just trying to get you to stop talking with something genetic. Sometimes you just want to rant about a shit situation you're in that you have no power to change on your own at the moment. So someone giving you advice you can't practically take is annoying.
And also, sometimes people just need to get shit off their chest and have someone tell them their emotions are
valid.
No. 1613826
File: 1687369541206.jpg (6.68 KB, 192x203, Depression_Quest_logo.jpg)
I really hate my life. I suck at my job and make a trillion stupid inattentive mistakes that make everyone around me assume I'm retarded. Someone calls me to tell me the steps of the task I'm supposed to do and I promptly forget it after the call and I'm unable to make sense of my notes. It takes me an hour to write an email because I keep rewriting it because it's never good enough. I misunderstand tasks. I feel either apathetic and bored or overwhelmed and panicking about having fucked things up. After work I literally have no energy for anything other than zoning out or scrolling endlessly or watching pointless Youtube videos.
I used to have hobbies and ambitions and goals but I don't have the energy to pursue them. I would love to have friends but I'd have to have energy and interests and hobbies to befriend someone. I'm seeing an umpteenth therapist but she cannot really say anything new to me. I feel like my life has literally ended. I don't know what to do. God knows I tried to change but I always feel back into being numb and not doing anything
No. 1613930
File: 1687378541154.jpg (91.15 KB, 941x1600, stock-photo-business-man-stand…)
>crushing on a guy for a while
>flirt back and forth a lot
>sends me shirtless pic, hot
>sends me dick pic, hot
>days go by
>hit him up again
>ask him to send nudes
>he sends me a naked pic posed up like pic rel, flaccid, emotionless face, looking as if he'd been blackmailed into taking the photo
Why do they have to ruin everything? I'm genuinely upset. I don't even want to look at it, it looks so pathetic, like a 6 year old boy waking up at 3 AM to do the "mommy, I threw up" pose
No. 1613955
File: 1687381435126.png (42.29 KB, 500x326, 1667781716872.png)
bitch i fuckin know you're avoiding me yet likely talking to our mutual (moid) friend daily to fulfill the attention void since your husband works so much (to SUPPORT you he doesnt even have a choice) and wtf!!! its so obvious what has been going on… i miss u and love u but you're literally hurting everyone around you. smh i bet our friend doesn't even know you're married, that's why you told me not to tell anyone huh??? so my attention once again is not good enough for a fellow female. im straight too and i get wanting male attention but i get enough from my (also working all the time) bf. ???? i think i am a pretty good friend but poof girls disappear because i guess male attention is somehow more valuable than female friendship. idgi since male attention is a fuckin dime a dozen, we're both young and attractive. i wouldn't care if it was attention from your husband but nope you're emotionally cheating AGAIN. i feel sorry for him. i wanted to hang out with you guys this summer but instead i'm just driving around by myself and constantly visiting my parents and brother, and worrying that my schizo theory is right since you don't wanna talk to me beyond surface level stuff because i know you are GUILTY!!!!!!
No. 1613959
File: 1687381888880.png (111.89 KB, 500x557, IMG_4277.png)
how can i attract cute metalhead catboys?? don't tell me to go to their shitty shows or bars because most of the moids there are old, ugly and addicted to coke…nvm i shouldn't do this they're all abusive. but i really want a metalhead bf…
No. 1613980
File: 1687384551099.png (157.17 KB, 275x275, 1684463608865.png)
I'm starting to think my life is over and I'm just a husk or something. I've never felt well, but as the years went by the fatigue has gotten worse.
Recently I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea (no, I am not fat) alongside another disorder which explains a lot, but after saving up and barely affording a CPAP, I can't even fall asleep with the mask on and I don't even know what to do anymore, I can barely think, I'm so tired that it's painful, every day I wake up with my head feeling like it's going to explode. Can't enjoy much, it's been over a decade since I last laughed. I wish there was a switch I could hit that'd erase me already.
No. 1613995
File: 1687385271546.gif (14.89 MB, 498x498, gatinho-chorando-gato-chorando…)
There's no 'cool side of pillow' left on my pillow anymore. Both sides are warm.
No. 1613998
File: 1687385403821.jpg (6.27 KB, 199x253, cdxgd.jpg)
Why am I still salty about something that happened in primary school (I'm a fucking ESL so even that might be wrong, I was like 9/10 years old)? I had long fangs and I absolutely loved them. I wasn't a vampirefag, but they reminded me of cats. I used to bite myself on the arm and only two dots were visible. If my cat bit me while we were playing I bit myself too and laughed about how our teeth are similar. Then I went to the mandatory dentist appointed by school. She was a horrible person and everyone hated her. Not only the kids, but also parents. That bitch filed my canines without asking or telling me.
My canine tooths now just have a sharp stop. It is very visible they are filed. I miss my original teeth.
I need to let go since there's nothing I can do. I am too old for this grudge, but fuck you, dentist bitch. I hope you have lost all your teeth. They were already greenish when I was a child.
No. 1614001
>>1613912i'm sorry you have to deal with it too nona, it's really hard. i hope we find someone who listens soon
>>1613933that's really sweet of you to share and it really does help me to sort of redefine the way i look at things. i've been working on my need for validation lately and i think that has a lot to do with it too. i think it's also hard because 1) i've been dealing with this mostly for the past several years, including some really traumatic, awful moments that genuinely absolutely crushed my self-esteem into tiny little parts, and 2) my main points of comparison are groups where other people noticeably get a lot more 'attention' (which sounds so childish, but it's the best way i can describe it) and even in those settings i do try to speak to people like that and word things like that - opening up conversation, acknowledging those i'm currently talking to so it doesn't feel like they're talking to a brick wall - but nothing ever seems to help. it makes me feel like i'm in limbo.
i will try to keep this in mind while i work on my other issues that are probably attached to this - thank you (pretend there's a smiley face here)
No. 1614010
>>1613998My dad was bitter about this right up until the day he died, he had teeth like yours from his description. Hope it doesn’t bother you forever… but it is fucked up. I don’t have super long ones but my orthodontist tried to file mine and I was shocked I had to argue with him about it, even though I clearly didn’t want that he tried to pressure me. I let him do the lightest touch with the sanding tool and instantly regretted it after two seconds and said
stop, that’s enough thank you he was clearly so mad about it and thought I was wrong. I asked him if it had any benefit for me or if there was any risk in keeping them natural and he sourly said no it was purely an aesthetic thing, but he seemed confounded that I didn’t agree all teeth should be the same length. But they don’t file the front ones which are longer most of the time… so like wtf? Leave my pointies alone
No. 1614080
File: 1687392070128.jpg (124.25 KB, 945x1260, FweHVVyWwAE5KLD.jpg)
If an anon is super retaliative or condescending about someone venting about an abuser I would very wary of taking their aggressive replies seriously. Very suspect hmmmmm
No. 1614090
File: 1687392813993.jpeg (26.39 KB, 400x280, s890564493579956837_p47_i2_w40…)
IF YOU CONTROL TRAFFIC- GET OFF YOUR FUCKING CELLPHONE!!!!!!
I'm so fucking mad, my other TCP and I were single laneing and he literally wouldn't stop SCROLLING on his fucking cellphone. SCROLLING. AND TEXTING! Like your job is LITERALLY to control TRAFFIC. And then I told my traffic control supervisor and she told me "not to worry, if there's an accident it's his fault" like what the fuck? Why am I dealing with so many fucking retards?! It's literally a SAFETY issue. Fuck me.
No. 1614245
>>1614204???? Tell that to the scores of women happily and eagerly defending genuine abusers and licking their boots.
>>1614200Yup totes!! Their bias toward horrible people is their third eye opening.
No. 1614304
File: 1687410021529.gif (2.53 MB, 500x413, C2AA3BEA-A762-411A-89BE-F886DB…)
How the fuck do you signal to people that you’re not a they/them without putting a target on your back? I’m a somewhat masculine/GNC woman and every time someone asks me about my pronouns I want to do things that would get me put on an FBI watchlist if I dared to say them aloud.
No. 1614377
File: 1687420147512.jpeg (75.16 KB, 974x1023, 473359AE-46FA-45A1-AC1A-764062…)
can’t have SHIT on lolcow
No. 1614394
File: 1687421804592.jpg (75.49 KB, 730x771, i'm the cat.jpg)
>>1614370Looking conventionally attractive or having feminine features can help a lot. Also at some point in some cultures women are expected to look more mature and less feminine as they age. Sometime I get misgendered from the back but never from the front. People only tend to force gender cult on me if they know me a bit more since I act in a way that they perceive as masculine. I wish people would stop ascribing a gender to every human behaviors under the sun. Recently an ex friend called me a trans man with internalized transphobia because I look masculine in her eyes and refuse to acknowledge transgenderism. Fuck you girlie, you aren't better than rightoids transing their LGB or GNC children.
No. 1614402
File: 1687422893555.jpeg (292.24 KB, 1555x2024, 1C1DFB9B-A3F7-4D3D-A152-DA6347…)
>>1613366I wish I could hug you nonna. I know it wouldn’t do anything but I wish I could.
>awful eczema breakout that was literally head to toe, didn’t go to the doctors, just dealt with it >stop putting effort into my looks, dress more plainly, no more makeup, no more jewelry, no more bangs >look like a filthy dog with scabies>want to start putting more effort into my looks because I’m starting to miss it >fucked around and found out that my friends also want a push in that direction (to physically look nice)>feel worthless and like a waste of resourcesIt feels like a lot. The effort itself, by principle, is not the bad thing. I just get this all consuming feeling that I’m not worth the effort and that I should just drop it because I’m being a bother. Whenever I would take a shower I’d always get questioned like “where are you going?” When the pandemic started, I stopped taking showers because I thought I wasn’t worth it and that I was a waste of water. It was such a mistake. I can’t feel like I can exist and be ok with myself. When I had the breakout I stopped everything just because I felt really awful about myself, even besides the eczema. It’s hard to hear from someone I love that I’m not someone that puts actual effort into their physical and aesthetic appearance because I didn’t do it on purpose. I feel like I just say that into the void over and over, I didn’t do this on purpose. I didn’t think when I was dressing plainer and not cutting my hair that other people would notice so much. In some ways I was happy because I wasn’t being a bother anymore. But now I blew up over something that happened, and now I’m suddenly finding out that my friends have been thinking that because I neglect my looks I’m neglecting my life, mental health, everything. They’re all ahead of me in life too so. My best friend was saying that I should use this as a chance to do something and joked that it’s like an intervention. I feel bad because I should be overjoyed that they care about me but it feels a little gross. Why am I the only one that gets an “intervention.” I feel like I NEED to feel certain ways and I can’t for the life of me feel it genuinely. I really really really want to feel grateful for my friends but what I went through this first half of the year was a lot. Just bless them for their tolerance. But I didn’t mean to look bad and I’m sorry I don’t have my life together. I’m seething because they’re right and I feel like a little kid that got caught red handed. I feel like that constantly, I still live with my parents and everyday has a default highstrung feeling because I know I’m being judged. I keep wanting to write how I feel for this vent but it actually doesn’t fucking matter. It’s putrid. And it sucks to hear what you think about yourself out loud. So much focus on hating myself that I didn’t notice others would hate me too. I sound dramatic but it’s really not that bad. I just feel so disgusting and like spite is all I have
No. 1614421
File: 1687425043302.jpeg (21.43 KB, 321x375, IMG_1448.jpeg)
>>1614395weird behaviour…
No. 1614459
File: 1687430862469.jpg (42.17 KB, 500x568, 34ae0b027d5e4796477ed3a71fe3a4…)
I was talking to some friends about 'is womanhood victimhood?' and it's made me realise that the way I was raised has made me eternally guilty for surviving. My mother has experienced such a terrible life, physically abusive ex fiancé, CSA, and because of that she raised me to constantly feel unsafe around men. Not that I think it's unreasonable but I get intrusive thoughts about being raped by a lot of the men in my life, it's really upsetting. I'm constantly wondering if the next man I meet is the one who will finally make me a victim.
I think the most damaging thing is that she raised me to expect to become a victim, not just to know it's a possibility.
No. 1614463
File: 1687431896285.jpeg (26.6 KB, 678x601, 5A8FC32B-2530-4D04-B88B-9C6DCA…)
Trying so hard not to tell these retards off, you anons are really fucking testing me today. I will not infight I will not infight.
No. 1614471
>>1613444Blast some very cheesy ass Jpop on your window 24/7 when you go outside.
For example you could blast this on a speaker while yourself wear headphones (this song is insufferable), normoids absolutely hate weeb shit and they can blast all the EDM they want, nothing is more insufferable than moe jpop. They will fold in 2 days.
No. 1614524
>>1614468I think it's like Sewol or Thai cave or Turkey earthquakes, it's news about people in a potential to be saved or die situation. People like news like this because it feels like a movie.
Those sub people are already gone anyway and at least the memes about it are funny
It's rich people doing dumb shit, it's not like the other news I mentioned.
No. 1614525
File: 1687439032080.png (177.85 KB, 568x568, tumblr_882f25672a19b6fda6ff5d4…)
>stressful day, sitting on front porch smoking a fag
>old man neighbour comes outside
>"hullo"
>waggles his finger at me "you quit that smoking! it's not good for you"
>i'm overworked underpaid and want to kill myself "haha it's been a long day!"
i hate being addicted to this nasty shit but you'll be dead before i am anyway leave me alone
No. 1614554
>>1614530>"Well cats are hunters so it's natural they do that." Hey bitch I fucking know that already, are you insane? Hey anon I know some people have treated you really fucked and belittling lately but I really don't think the lady meant anything by this about your intelligence.
Better to attribute to lack of charisma than malice, a lot of people just state obvious things just to fill awkward silences and voids in a conversation without realizing how idiotic it sounds.
I myself have definitely said nebulous things that could have been interpreted negatively in retrospect and I cringe.
It's understandable that you're on edge but I would save the real rage for people who actually do pretty fucked up shit to you, like that asshole.
No. 1614561
>>1614538Anón, this is a loving reminder that no women ever starts dating a guy under the pretense that they’re an average scrote.
> he said he wasn't sure he was even able to feel romantically towards someone. He's very sweet in his weird way, and once my feelings were made known he's done everything he can to avoid leading me on. He is not your average scrote.Scrote not wanting anything serious is the norm.
I do wish you the best,
nonnie.
No. 1614562
>>1614538Its not manipulative to understand how someone works, nonna! If he's really special it may be worth waiting. Good luck, I really hope it works out for you.
>>1614545Thats scary af. Is the blood dark or bright red? If its dark it CAN mean a bleed is occurring deeper inside of you, or that blood has been 'sat' somewhere for a while. If its bright red, its a bleed that'll likely be occurring closer to your butthole. Bright red is considered more 'safe', but even if it is, please please go to the doctors.
No. 1614566
>>1614538Cringe. You're wasting your youth when you could be out having fun and experiences. Instead you're spending multiple hours a day trying to spark joy in an autismo who admitted he had no romantic feelings for anybody (ouch fam) and who obviously doesn't care about making plans or a future with you. Being nice is the bare minimum for phone conversations and costs him nothing.
He has avoidant attachment and you have abandonment issues. A match made in hell. You are chasing after someone who doesn't want you because you are lonely and I guess maybe feel you can't do better–but you can! I believe in you.
No. 1614570
File: 1687443047522.png (42.49 KB, 463x473, cryingonly.png)
I can't believe I let myself get this attached to someone who didn't really care about me. I can't believe I still haven't gotten over this. I have to stop being so pathetic and just move the fuck on.
No. 1614602
>>1614501>>boat filled with 400-700 smuggled migrants capsized off the coast of Greece, and all the women and children on board drowned because they were forced to stay inside the boatThat's so sad. I did not know there were women and children on that boat. Every coverage I've seen were mentioning the missing and dead
victims, and survivors being men etc, and I just tuned out of it lol. I wonder why the women and children were forced to stay inside.
No. 1614614
File: 1687446422580.jpg (77.21 KB, 640x459, 007bbca2d818ed27c3b8e6c858d437…)
Oral state exam in a few days and I barely even study, I am so gonna fail but I at least wanna try when I can just take it again if in fall if I fail. I'm gonna look like such a fucking idiot. I'm too tired. I try to study the whole day but end up on YouTube or lolcow, when I banned it from my phone I just prpcstastinated some other way. My face got so old and my hair greyed so much, I need to dye it soon. I'm just too fucking tired I had another state exam 3 weeks ago and I didn't even have more than 3 days of rest. I hope my face won't stay like this. I also have a fat gut now even though I'm still the same low weight. I'm in the full stress mode where fat forms around your stomach from cortisol abundance I think. I should have postponed this exam to fall. This is gonna be a dumb attempt that literally made my health worse. And stimulants don't even work anymore. I wanna die ngl. I hope I can at least finish reading it one time. I always need to read it three times so I'm fucked.
No. 1614710
File: 1687453317760.jpg (435.44 KB, 1280x1662, 66d6bed1c0d8ca7598787f97abd923…)
can people stop yelling at me or dismiss everything I feel whenever I'm distressed? I also wish people would stop telling me that I should stop being upset since me being upset upsets them
No. 1614714
File: 1687453499624.jpg (34.81 KB, 567x542, tumblr_501ed3696a80689b5524203…)
will it ever be possible for me to not sound like a malfunctioning robot whenever i make small talk… always screwing up what i'm trying to say or mixing up words in a sentence or stuttering i can't stand it
No. 1614738
>>1614714It's just practice, anon! No one is born a socialite, though it may come more naturally to some. It's definitely a skill that can be learned by anyone.
>>1614732If you're planning out your day during your break, isn't that being productive? Look at it that way! Good job on starting early, anon. Take your break, plan out your day, grab a coffee or tea and snack so you can be even more productive when you resume your work.
No. 1614739
File: 1687455012172.jpg (104.18 KB, 1024x822, LR-Under-Eyes-cheeks-smile-lin…)
I have genetic smile lines that aren't bad in certain lighting but when lit from the side look absolutely terrible. I look like the pic on the right, except my mouth is tiny like a 1920s actress and the downturned corners make me look tired and pissed off all the time.
I'm also fairly young and just not sure what to wear. The rest of my face looks so good with trendier styles that skew younger, but the smile lines make me feel like a 35 year old mom cosplaying a 20-something. I also don't look good in anything too feminine or frilly, tomboyish styles have always fit me best, but maybe that's too youthful. Maybe I'll just accept that I will look ugly no matter what.
No. 1614753
>>1614739Please don't drive yourself crazy with the whole nasolabial folds thing. I totally understand the insecurity as someone who has also had genetic smile lines since a very young age, but really most people won't focus on them nearly as much as you do when looking at your face. Especially since you say you look like the pic on the right, you realize that's supposed to be the better looking 'after' pic, right? It looks very normal and some people just have more pronounced smile lines than others. Airbrushed faces on social media with perfect lighting can make it seem like no other young woman has them, but they totally do and that's okay.
It won't all of a sudden make trendy clothing look weird either. If your skin and hair are healthy you probably look your age, so just wear whatever you like and don't worry about it looking too youthful for your face or whatever. Obviously I don't know you, but as someone with similar insecurities it can help to know that it's mostly in your head.
No. 1614757
>>1614739I have smile lines too anon and I really hate them but like other anons said we're probably fine and normal. We will always be hypercritical of our own faces, no one else is actually looking all that hard. When I see people with similar features I don't think negatively about them at all. Though I do burn with envy when I see people my age that look more "youthful" but that's a
toxic trait of mine that I'm working on.
No. 1614758
File: 1687456866285.jpg (40.07 KB, 500x500, artworks-DAD90oP0n7d20xPE-Plz3…)
>>1614739I have the same problem and I freaking hate it. I feel like when Im older I'll end up looking like Panther from the thunder cats( pic obviously related). What is there to do, botox? fillers?
No. 1614769
File: 1687457704670.jpg (Spoiler Image,55.28 KB, 1280x720, i wish i could die.jpg)
Is crystal cafe down?
I wanted to post my vent on there, but since it's not working on my computer right now lolcow's vent thread will have to do.
I fucking hate being 25, neurodivergent and still single. I'm currently away from home on a travel program hanging around a bunch of other college aged people. Every girl here is a normie Stacy, like genuinely. I can't converse with them on even the most basic level because we're in such different states of mind.
So I've been having sobbing fits because I'm dealing with drama associated with this guy friend of mine back home. We met online, and I had a crush on him when we were friends years ago and he rejected me, saying that he couldn't live up to being my boyfriend because his mental health wasn't good at the time. But it didn't matter, I found a boyfriend at the time and went off with him after he rejected me. Things didn't work out with my boyfriend and we broke up, so I went back to this old guy friend and became friends with him again. Only to find out, despite his so called "mental health issues" that didn't stop him from going out with a third friend of ours.
It didn't piss me off at first because I honestly found it funny. How I somehow managed to bring two people together because they both hated me (I cut them both off as friends and then they began dating), but now the more I talk with him the more it actually begins to piss me off?
And so I even went so far as to confide in the girls in my travel program about it, only one of them seemed like she genuinely was concerned and wanted to offer her advice. The rest of them just gave each other judgemental side-glances and smirked. Then one of the smirkers spoke out and said "Why do you care so much for a guy you met online? You should be focusing on meeting guys in real life because they're rEaL and online men are fake."
And this is what really made me depressed. No matter what, no matter who I confide in, especially other girls, they just don't get it. I was never properly socialized as a kid because I became emotionally stunted due to experiencing a trauma in high school. I never had the "high school experience" that enables a girl to grow and become socially conditioned properly. Instead my neurodivergence, along with my trauma, ruined my mental health and I resorted to becoming a chronically online depressed girl. I fervently believe that it's the complete opposite. People put on such false personas in person and the only real heartfelt interaction I feel I can get from people is from people online. That is why the only times I've ever been able to meet guys have been through online like Discord. My neurodivergence makes it so and I just don't think I can ever find people who will ever understand me or what I'm going through right now.
No. 1614786
>>1614780you had sex with your bf during your period!?!?! and he was ok with it? jfc
Back to your question, that doesn't sound like SA to me, just that you are being extra nice and telling him yes even though you were tired. Your hormones are making you overthink stuff like this
No. 1614798
>>1614780>>1614791How did the pressuring go, exactly? If you have a good relationship and he's as kind as you say, it should be obvious to him that you weren't into it and he should've stopped as soon as he noticed that.
Start a conversation with him about this. Tell him how you feel. There's basically two ways this can go: either he figured you were uncomfortable but selfishly continued anyway, or he didn't realize it and took your 'fine' at face value. The former is worse than the latter, but even if it's the latter he should learn to empathise with your feelings more.
No. 1614829
Vet took me for an idiot and tried to guilt trip me into paying $250 for basically an ancestry dna test but for kitten upper respiratory infections. I’ve had cats my whole life and have friends who work in rescue. We’ve all had kittens with URIs that get treated and then live with other cats. Nobody has ever heard of paying $250 for this shit. I know that’s straight up bullshit. He even said the treatment course would be the same whether I did the test or not. But then was like, even if the antibiotics make the kitten better, without the test we won’t know if she could still be contagious so if you want to do what’s best for your other cats I’d definitely do the test. Bitch NO screw you for guilting me and trying to manipulate me into spending double what I’m already spending here. Really tired of how many vets have become so shifty and will try to extort money from people like this, it’s happening more and more.
Btw the kitten is quarantined in a crate on my patio, my cats don’t go on the patio, the kitten will be away from my other cats entirely until clear of parasites and done with antibiotics and symptom free. I paid for the felv/fiv test, both negative, so that’s not a worry. I’m not an idiot and I’m not negligent and if I actually thought this was necessary I’d cut corners elsewhere to make it work money wise, I’d do anything for my pets, but I won’t be taken for a fool. Screw this douchey moid vet man, he’s the only vet there that doesn’t have a cat of his own btw. Manipulative moid asshole.
No. 1614834
File: 1687461641511.jpeg (45.1 KB, 745x606, B3094026-B987-4050-BECB-BCB292…)
>keep getting recommended video on cartel execution of a teen girl on YT
please leave me alone. I don’t care if she’s a snitch, she was a literal child. she didn’t deserve that shit or for it to be plastered to wear psychos on the internet can watch it. Moids are a blight on this planet, especially in Mex.
No. 1614856
File: 1687462915509.jpg (14.55 KB, 275x275, 1578842424256.jpg)
My cat has a tapeworm and I'm going insane. I already treated her and we don't have fleas so I know it's going to be fine, but I am just so fucking disgusted by the knowledge that she has been dropping tapeworm eggs all over my bedroom for at least a day and I didn't notice it. I want to bleach everything EUGH.
No. 1614864
File: 1687463445289.jpeg (11.57 KB, 300x280, 48D50F1C-EFEC-41DB-AEF7-7920FD…)
>>1614856My family was white trash and one of our cats always had tapeworms, with the nasty little bits crawling out his butt and wriggling around on my bed anytime he’d lay on it. It was heinous. One time one of our cats didn’t show any signs of shedding tapeworms out his ass like the other cat, but one day just started hacking like he was gonna have a hairball. Nope. Not a hairball. Hacked up a 5 foot long tapeworm and it was writhing around on the rug. I had a front row seat to that horror show, I was on the couch and he came up and did that right in front of me. I’ll never forget it, traumatic af.
No. 1614871
File: 1687464148371.png (14.33 KB, 200x200, 72c84c0862ec5105088b375e4d1583…)
when you had an abhorrent nightmare that your brain won't even let you put in words..
No. 1614878
File: 1687464342016.jpg (33.91 KB, 530x555, 4860785b46350688ee6d8c2bb1210f…)
it's my birthday today and my best friend of 13 years hasn't even acknowledged it. we talked a bit earlier today and even though i told her my estranged father asked if i'd like to go out to eat this weekend to celebrate. so she knows it's today, she's just not acknowledging it?? i haven't told my boyfriend that i live with about this because he already hates her for telling me once that she couldn't "justify" an hour's drive to see me after a year apart because she was "broke and gas is expensive." he thinks that wording it that way was very rude and uncalled for.
i'm hanging out with her on saturday so i may update with wtf is going on with her.
No. 1614896
File: 1687465133612.jpeg (44.83 KB, 450x340, 1B124678-33BD-4E43-8875-E3B415…)
>>1614878Happy birthday anon
>pic related is me @ your friend No. 1614944
File: 1687467987248.jpeg (23.87 KB, 480x480, 1606286497959.jpeg)
>>1614864fucking nightmare fuel anon holy shit
No. 1614966
File: 1687470233642.jpg (17.87 KB, 300x300, P50003.jpg)
>>1614956regular worming treatments. my cat isn't outdoor yet I still do routine fleeing/worming. you can get it from the vets or pet store, mine is in this little pippet of liquid thingie that goes onto the back of his neck (to avoid him licking it off) pic rel
No. 1614973
>>1614972it's not a game
nonny. what's there to win
No. 1614977
File: 1687471431013.jpeg (35.65 KB, 720x691, CA62373A-21E7-4D09-9EBC-021E49…)
>>1614689I honestly feel like you said something lots of us nonnas do, the anons replying to you are doing the same thing anyways.
No. 1615125
>>1614303Some of you are so stupid and unlikable and reply to people's posts with literally nothing of merit, nothing worth replying to, nothing that adds to the conversation. You did that. Take your L and go.
>>1614395You really are the reason nobody can say anything on here anymore omg
No. 1615134
File: 1687490968010.jpg (17.91 KB, 652x652, 1687313745700057.jpg)
The amount of outright entitlement and delusion I have been putting up with all for a MUCH better and strict outcome is infuriating sometimes. You really don't know how depraved some people are until you're constantly having to look it in the face and seeing just how far they will take it, all in the name of trying to hurt other people. People really do not care at all about their futures, I can say that much. But it's always nice when they don't realize the consequences of their actions are going to rush back not only tenfold, but in a way that will absolutely exhile them and they deserve every bit of it. It's also always funny when people pretend to be good people for the sake of their online following but they're actually the worst of all, they're always soooo pleased with themselves and are narcissistic enough to think they'll just go on like that forever until they are subsequently humilated.
No. 1615209
File: 1687496596681.png (2.04 MB, 1280x1202, IMG_1655.png)
I’m so romantic with women in a platonic sense (mostly platonic on their end but I try not to go overboard and be creepy like a moid). I remember all of the niche things they like so I can buy them gifts or send memes/random internet things I think they’ll enjoy. I notice all of the beautiful things about them. I’m reminded of them in so many little ways when we’re apart. If they let me I would draw them and make them playlists. And I never have the same energy given back to me. When will someone lovely crush on me in a friendly way and let me love them without feeling stupid? Why do I only get this from men?
No. 1615240
>>1612409After it happening a few times I think I cant be drinking anymore. I go from having a nice buzz to full blackout so fast these days. Is this a part of getting old? Wtf, I hate blacking out so much. Last time, I made out with my best friend and I try so hard not to fuck with her like that because she's constantly trying to get into my pants. Thank god I came out of it before anything else happened. But I hate the calls the next morning of "do you remember what you did last night
nonnie?". I swear I'm not a hoe but apparently black out me is. Its really put me off from drinking, don't want it anymore because I'm so scared of blacking out. Stupid vent but eh, I'm hating myself for it rn.
No. 1615279
>>1615195Agree.
I can hate people and feel empathetic toward them at the same time… CEO was an idiot who skipped out on safety precautions but it's still horrific to imagine him and them down there in the dark. Thank God it was quick.
I think a lot of people take this "empathetic" view where they'll say they're empathic and then only doll it out if they judge the person as deserving of it. And the stakes they judge people on are getting loftier (also because people are getting less empathetic toward their fellow man). Sure they were rich but what were they supposed to be, not? Someone's going to be. And the one kid was 17. Horrible anyway
No. 1615290
>>1615195Nah, idk how you can feel sad about 1. people who died doing stupid shit 2. people you didn't even know existed a week ago 3. men.
I never knew these men and I don't care. Idk why you do. Do you also feel sad when bad men die and people make fun of them? Do you feel sad when another school shooter moid is killed? When a pedo gets raped and killed in prison? When a tranny gets gunned down by another moid? Seems very disingenuous to me to pretend you care about every single deceased person you hear about.
No. 1615292
>>1615281your dad's a piece of shit
nonnie. the best way to spite him is to live your best life.
No. 1615314
>>1615281omg anon! my brother was also an incel who jumped off a cliff! what are the odds?
you should kill your dad and take his money
No. 1615315
>>1615281omg anon! my brother was also an incel who jumped off a cliff! what are the odds?
you should kill your dad and take his money>>1615281
No. 1615316
>>1615281omg anon! my brother was also an incel who jumped off a cliff! what are the odds?
you should kill your dad and take his money>>1615281
No. 1615317
>>1615281omg anon! my brother was also an incel who jumped off a cliff! what are the odds?
you should kill your dad and take his money>>1615281
No. 1615321
>>1615295I use to be like this and my mom took me to every doctor to find out what was wrong with me, and everytime she got nothing. Some even called me attention seeking and told her to just ignore me and leave me be.
Later on it turned out I had hyperacusis.
I'm not saying the kid necessarily has that, but try to stay strong and understanding nonna.
No. 1615354
>>1615295Maybe the kid has anxiety?
My beighbor kid screeches a lot but it doesn't bother me for some reason like it should. It sounds like a pterodactyl.
No. 1615475
File: 1687533830361.jpeg (226.85 KB, 1242x1242, A86A9123-D0FC-4ACF-BCB4-DA950E…)
How the fuck do I get a better immune system? I already do the shit in these articles I’ve found on google
>Get enough sleep
I sleep 7 to 8 hours daily.
>Eat more whole plant foods
Every meal of mine has veggies and fruits of any kind.
>Eat more healthy fats
My salads only have a pinch of olive oil and avocados, I also like my sandwiches with olive oil, maybe plant based butter.
>Eat more fermented foods or take probiotic supplements
Okay, I admit I don’t eat yogurt that often.
>Limit added sugars
I dropped sugar a long time ago already.
>Engage in moderate exercise
I go to the gym daily for 2 hours, if I’m not sick like right now, of course.
>Stay hydrated
I drink around 4 liters of water daily, or more.
>Manage your stress levels
I’m literally the most relaxed person in the world with the most chill routine ever. Yeah, I can’t find a job and I want to kill myself every single day, but I don’t think I’m having panic attacks level of stressed.
>Take vitamin supplements
I had to stop taking them because I get sick and tend to have to go straight to taking antibiotics so I can’t mix them with the vitamins.
What the fuck should I do now? Have yogurt everyday? I hate how getting sick fucks up everything, I can’t go out with my friends, I can’t focus on my training at this costumer service job, I can’t visit my family and I can’t even eat with my brother and his girlfriend because I could get them sick. I can’t go to the gym either, I can’t workout at home, I can’t even sing or dance at home be a I get tired, playing with my dog gives me a terrible coughing fit and I’m too high on medicines to draw or write.
I hate this shit.
No. 1615498
>>1615496Maybe I need to eat more red meat, I’ve been eating only fish and chicken for almost a year already, not because I don’t like red meats, but because of my diets to lose weight, the nutritionists and endocrinologists keep telling me that to lose weight I have to avoid red meats, so now I only eat red meats around once a week or once every two weeks.
Maybe that’s why I keep getting sick right when my period strikes.
No. 1615510
File: 1687536182420.jpeg (42.48 KB, 750x724, A14693B2-5087-4049-B4A5-FE0E1A…)
Most people aren’t willing to be truly deep and vulnerable with each other and I’m fucking tired of it. I don’t want a surface level relationship where I’m only there to soothe but not actually probe some scrote’s issues while he takes out all of his shit on me. I’ve dumped loser moids because they’re shallow and boring and I’ve been dumped by men who did have some level of depth but were too cowardly to actually explore that side of themselves with me. Yeah I’m in terrible pain over a break up that happened over a year ago but at least I’m not chasing some scrote and trying to mother him into loving me. I feel like so many relationships are based off of deep dysfunction, even between normies. I want something where we can be silly and goofy together but also have deep conversations. I have awful abandonment issues and each time I walk away it’s painful on a level I can barely describe but at least I can walk away.
No. 1615515
>>1613825True about someone being redundant and offering advice that you've already tried. That can be frustrating. I just can't see myself telling a problem to a friend and being totally uninterested in their perspective and potential help.
I could just write a bathroom mirror affirmation that says "your feelings are
valid." If I'm speaking with a human, I'm personally interested in their perspective on things. I still find it dehumanizing that people want to treat others as automated feelings-validators and nothing more. Like, why bother venting to a friend when you don't want their take on the situation?
No. 1615595
File: 1687544001429.jpg (12 KB, 340x199, 1687541185102926.jpg)
>>1615506Feel better now but yeah I definitely do. Last hobby got difficult to maintain so I've been kind of sitting around uselessly, think that's the crux of it
No. 1615726
File: 1687551872421.gif (4.08 MB, 275x275, 1648967236599.gif)
My parents won't get off my case on when I'll start dating or get a husband, but they have some insane standards for my partner to be a rich socialite too. Like today some guy approached me after getting off the bus and started talking all kinds of tradshit and asked for my number, so I was in a hurry, I put something into his phone and quickly put in back to his hand saying I must be on my way now. Later I told my parents about someone asking for my number (without telling anything about the offputting things he said) and they started going off on how I should've told him to fuck off and how naive I am, that I'm not allowed to meet this dude and "this is not how couples meet". I don't care about this dude, but where am I supposed to meet man then? Upscale bars and VIP salons I don't go to? I don't want to marry any of their friends' spoiled nighmarish sons just because they make good money
No. 1615744
File: 1687552996820.jpg (56.34 KB, 911x865, Tumblr_l_1689620709718895.jpg)
i love my sister but sometimes I genuinely get so sick of her attitude towards men. she will get involved with the lowest classes of men, plain trash, always complete retards who are unemployed or balding or "fuckboys" and fall for their lovebombing. she'll get so lost in them and forget everything else in her life and then they hurt her and she'll go all "all men are trash i'll never be with a man again" but all of us know that's not true and she'll make the same mistake again because she has so many times. every time we try to warn her and make the guy's red flags clear because they're always so obvious but she gets so defensive. and then worst of all, she labels me as this silly man-hater when i am only ever rational about my hatred for shitty men, it isn't something that comes and goes depending on my relationship status. and fuck, i've been in a stable relationship with a man for years and it works because he's always understood how scummy most men are. sometimes i'll be having conversations with my sister and i say something honest about a man and she suddenly feels the need to defend them and brings up one of her Good Male friends even though she knows i'm talking about the bigger picture. fucking hell, one time we were talking about andrew tate and i was saying he's a horrible person and she started lightly defending him and saying he has done some good and the media paints him in a poor light. like what the fuck? how can you ever think like that about a man who has been convicted for sex trafficking and has made his hatred for women so obvious with no honest plea for redemption? it makes me sick because she's gonna be stuck in this cycle of shitty men, so many fucking women are like this and it makes me mad because they're constantly getting hurt and never learning somehow. where is their pattern recognition, why is their hatred for men so shallow? i just want the best for her but she's never ever going to get it at this rate
No. 1615765
File: 1687553886679.png (89.97 KB, 540x309, 45455.png)
Starting to think part of why I've always felt like such an asshole was my enmeshed and somewhat abusive family making me believe having any boundaries, choosing yourself and not constantly blaming yourself for why others hurt/demean you made you a bad person. Maybe I was not being an asshole and just trying to be healthy & protect myself all this time. Really makes you think ….
No. 1615793
>>1615593If a bad person dies in a bad way, I feel that he got what he deserved. I definitely do not feel sad. That's psycho behaviour.
You'd feel bad if a drug dealer got killed by other drug dealers? Wtf.
No. 1615836
>>1614887Ahh, glad things are going well for you now
nonnie.
No. 1615993
>>1615702It's a horrible thing to have to carry with you. I think you learn to keep it for so long that it just eats away at you. You see other families where the secret destroyed them, where the
victim was exiled, where entire families were ripped apart. Its a very difficult burden to bear and so many different people will try to tell you so many different ways you should be handling it.
No. 1616034
>>1616008>we're*weren't
>>1616031I'm not even going to argue right now. Like I said, if I misunderstood the post then I am sorry. It's not about being sensitive but just how anons can be to other anons venting.
No. 1616035
File: 1687574140207.jpg (159.11 KB, 1080x1440, Yawn.jpg)
I have no idea why but my anxiety gets so fucking bad at night. I'm like stressed all day and then I get tired and that makes it 100x worse. But I can't just go to sleep every time I get tired so I have to stay up and deal with it sometimes. and I'm not receptive to caffeine or anything which sucks.
No. 1616051
File: 1687576953884.jpeg (54.48 KB, 306x510, D7CD095C-4647-4750-91D1-DED666…)
I like lolita fashion and have for over a decade, I have a large wardrobe full of burando, but I just don’t have any urge to participate in comms on any level. I used to at least participate in the online communities, but I haven’t looked at cgl in over 2 years now. Once I decided my wardrobe was complete I just stopped participating in the community in any way, I wear the clothes and sometimes send coord pics to friends, that’s it.
I went to one meetup with my local comm one single time. It was kinda fun, but that nasty sissy troon was there and made me sooooo uncomfortable. Picrel is him. I also don’t understand why he was at my local comm’s meet up at all since he isn’t even from my state. Does he just go to all the bigger ticketed meetups all over the country or some shit?
No. 1616129
File: 1687581197082.jpg (111.38 KB, 1170x1111, 1681308660990.jpg)
I have this trans (MTF) friend for over ten years. He trooned out about 3 years ago and has generally become more insane and paranoid about persecution as they all seem to. He's been on hormones for a few years and had his balls cut off about 6 months ago. All of it is horrifying to me. He purposely misgenders me as "he." and insists I am a FTM waiting to happen and I just don't know it. I just grin and laugh it off because here's the thing, he's SO vindictive. And so online. He blackmailed my brother about something years ago and I've never forgotten it. They have no contact since. He reactivated his tumblr and sent me a message saying "just so u know, u reblogged something from a terf." I had no idea he even followed me all those years back, let alone his username to even block him. I am on radblr. Everyone and everything I reblog pretty much is radfem related. Anyway since then I've censored myself on there because I'm afraid of him going nuclear and doxxing me, contacting my job and telling them I'm a transphobe or some shit. Don't know what to do. He used to be so funny anf smart, and he still is under the layers of trans shit but I feel like a prisoner of this loser tranny.
No. 1616140
>>1616135to be fair, the part that I left out was my brother also being a shitty person so I glossed over the blackmail originally.
>>1616136I have sanitized my blog completely to remove any identifiers, and never really had any to begin with, no pictures and not my real name. I like the misgendering is violence idea kek thanks
nonny No. 1616144
>>1616142thanks
nonny. I wonder what a job would even do if they got a random message from a righteous troon anyway? Does that happen? I would love any HR nonnies to share.
No. 1616153
File: 1687583067097.jpeg (12.47 KB, 275x178, 1648612573983.jpeg)
Witnessed one of my friends troon out in real time into a tif "gay boy" and there was nothing i could do to stop her because she didn't wanna listen to me, she used to be fine with being a woman but now she flat out hangs out with gross people that enable her and barely talks to me, likely because i'm an evil transphobe in her eyes, it's pretty clear she did this to cope with her mental problems that she has, i feel like i'm losing a friend and i wish i could save her but theres nothing i can do since she won't listen. Sorry i had to get this out off my chest because it's hurting me, it's really sad to see someone who you admired turn into a person like this.
No. 1616192
File: 1687587509522.gif (1.67 MB, 275x275, 1645073618076.gif)
i hate this site now because mods banned me for a shitpost in a shitposting thread and i have evil plans (this is a joke mods leave me alone you fucking sub 70 iq cunts) but nontheless i will continue to visit and see what kind of retardation is going on. i love you bitches and theres a big chunk of my heart reserved exclusively for lolcow it pains me to see it get worse/deader/full of the bad kind of retard
No. 1616197
File: 1687587795727.png (4.93 KB, 122x142, 1.png)
>>1616129nonnas, i want you all free from the trannies. just block him on everything, cut all contact, and if anyone brings up that the tranny is saying anything about you, tell them he is a stalker and is spreading lies about you to try to ruin your life. and say he did the same to your brother. i really hope the tranny fucks off to his sad little tranny cave.
No. 1616219
File: 1687589933488.jpg (95.65 KB, 617x900, my wife.jpg)
lately i've been attention whoring on IG for some male validation and i realized how worthless it is. i don't want to go again through the process of meeting some stupid moid and ending traumatized by him. also performing for them it's exhausting, because its always the ugly ones simping more than the cute ones. it doesn't matter, i don't want to be near males anymore.
No. 1616230
File: 1687591642941.jpg (19.31 KB, 384x384, EUDODqPXkAENDc7.jpg)
I think I'm finally over my UTI but now I'm constipated. Please, I don't need an upset stomach immediately after it's been hard for me to eat for two weeks.
No. 1616231
>>1616230eat a big bowl of peas and you'll be poopin good soon nona
god speed on your clogged system, you got this my dear
No. 1616244
>>1616241ayrt I'm so sorry nona, it's seriously like that. they've finally quieted down but seeing them roam all day scream-mooing for their calves (who I would always say hello to who had huge beautiful eyes and big flappy ears) who are all gone now. it happens pretty often but it's like it gets worse every time. I hate knowing they're suffering on a primal level, and now I've made you suffer too by talking about it. sorry nona.
it's all so shit.
No. 1616246
File: 1687594198990.jpg (143.75 KB, 1366x1398, zzzz.jpg)
>>1616234its suigintou from rozen maiden,
nonnie No. 1616265
File: 1687596878363.png (206.81 KB, 500x750, Cher.png)
I am going to continue to enjoy life even if someone or something ends up killing me. I am tired of being sad. I love my husbandos. And I love my pod.
No. 1616268
>>1616265she loves her pod, she loves her nonas,
but most of all she loves husbandos
No. 1616270
File: 1687598035378.jpg (8.71 KB, 410x314, 54972518f7a3f28a685d726f78ac6b…)
I can't anymore. Why some retarded shit happens whenever I decide to visit my friends in russia. W H Y
The war started a couple of days before I had my trip. Mobilisation started when I was visiting them another time. Now there is some possibility for a civil war or some shit that prigozhin decided to start. Cool and all, but, again, why DAYS before I have my fucking trip. I'm so done. I just want to see my friends and have a good time, since with all of this shit there is no possibility for them to move to me due to all of this retardness and restictions. They are my only friends. Can we at least have one (1) normal trip?
No. 1616282
File: 1687601795502.jpeg (74.46 KB, 735x606, 911518D8-E0AE-4539-8500-BEAB2B…)
>>1616197Thanks nona. I will! Gonna ghost this tyrannical tranny.
No. 1616283
File: 1687601939134.jpg (124.05 KB, 1024x1008, 1609737164412.jpg)
>>1616282i salute you, good luck.
No. 1616328
>>1616310may not be the advice you're looking for, but you have to take it one step at a time, one day at a time. to save some money, you might want to look at going to a local/community college and take some general education classes + some electives that sound interesting to see what you're interested in. i know this might sound like blah blah typical advice. i'm still in undergrad, i'm 24 and just figured out where i want to work last year. you could always go get some credit that will be transferrable, figure out what degree you want THEN go to uni.
20s being the best time of your life is bullshit, many people i know in their 30s seem to be in their prime then, some people it didn't happen until they were 40. fuck all the dumb pressure, i know what my goals are and they won't be reached for a long time, but putting in the time and effort to reach them will make it worth it.
No. 1616339
File: 1687609887977.jpg (27.26 KB, 540x416, sadfatcat.jpg)
Nearing 30 and I'm becoming terrified no person will ever fall in love with me and that I'll never even have a single relationship
No. 1616346
I have a new friend at college. Great, because it's been a while since I introduce new people to my life.
But she is so needy, I can see it from now, and we just started talking some months ago. I'm very open to my academic failures, so I think she sees comfort in me because I don't judge. But she just info dumps to me, I see that she needs an older figure because her family life is shitty, and she desperately needs validation.
I've had friendships like this before. People use me as their therapist, and I used to like it. Because I like resolving problems and I felt useful. But I don't really gain much from them, I cant be open to other people, or when I do, it feels like a chore to form relationships. And some years ago I lost my best friend because she was in a constant state of seeking validation, seeing me as the carrier of the truth or something.
I don't know if I'm just scared to establish a new friendship because of the loss of a very important friendship, or I'm avoiding a person that will drain me. She also has the same kind of trauma with strict parents, seeing her value tied only to academic success.
No. 1616355
File: 1687611036478.png (105.47 KB, 375x287, IMG_8129.png)
bump for cp stay safe nonnas
No. 1616428
>>1616403Have you tried therapy to talk about these issues specifically? I was experiencing psychosis for two years in high school and I guess no one knew (or cared) until a social worker was like, “Uh, she’s psychotic. She needs to go to the hospital.” Then my mom accused my of being attention seeking and faking it lol. It’s
almost kind of funny now because of how absurd it is, but talking about it in therapy helped me get there
No. 1616512
>>1616504It’s not easy, my dad is a veterinarian and he cries whenever he can’t save an animal, then he gets depressed for a few days. I think only really emotionally strong people can become medics, either of animals or people, because at some point they will have to see their patients die right in front of their own eyes, and it’s honestly not a pretty thing to witness.
The things you could do that’s related to animals but probably has no deaths is either training or grooming, you get to help them by keeping them clean or teaching them good habits, and to their owners too, so they can have a life as healthy and nice as possible.
No. 1616530
>>1616529Nevermind, I already found the reason, I'm a retard
>The continual boosts and drops in blood sugar levels can trigger the release of adrenalin and cortisol into the bloodstream, causing anxiety and sometimes even panic attacksStill don't know how to stop eating this shit, I tried so, so many times for like 2 years, and I always go back
No. 1616534
>>1616512There's a reason vets have one of the highest rates of suicide. Working around dying animals is rough, and shitty owners who couldn't care less about their pets don't make it any easier.
I did some volunteering at a shelter for a bit and I liked it, it'd be nice to get into it again. A training course could be nice, and grooming is starting to get popular in my country so it's also an attractive choice.
No. 1616556
File: 1687629429090.jpg (46.75 KB, 379x744, 714alv0z6cl._ac_sl1500_.jpg)
>>1616537And that's why we should only fuck male virgins. Men are whores. Condoms wouldn't protect you from catching HPV anyway. You should tell him to get tested before you had sex with him and then not touching him with a ten foot pole. This cunt will give this shit to other women. If you found out he's dating someone, I would just send her a message about it kek
Take AHCC capsules, it's a shiitake mushroom extract proven to help the body clear itself from HPV infections and boosting your immune system.
No. 1616562
My friends got married recently and I put alot of effort into the event. I set up activities, I helped with setting up the floral wrapped alter, the tables the linen. My bf ran and got water the day of when he found out the caterer didnt provide the water (which, what the actual fuck?) We made sure everything ran as smoothly as possible, to the extent that the wedding planner bombarded me all day with questions. (Why did she even get paid?) i helped for 3 fucking days straight setting up, helping, and breaking down said event.
There were friends from all over the world there, and we made plans to meet a week later for a fun night out. The bride and groom went on a little trip a few hours away with the traveling friends this week. Cool.
WHATS NOT COOL is that while I juggle 3 jobs, take time off for this outting, and try to plan the day so its fun and we are all on the same page, no one responds. No one confirms, no one does anything. Finally the bride reaches out to one of my friends who stayed in town and said “you know, we decided not to do the [event] we all agreed on because we got married and it was a big deal”. Never contacts me, never calls. I dont care plans are cancelled. I care that there is no consideration for my time or my work schedules or my life when i have shown nothing but care and support for your “special day”.
Ive never been so mad at the couple in the 10+ years I have known them, and honestly I want a fucking apology. It takes 5 minutes tops to contact me directly. I am this close to just ignoring any attempt of conversation from them for the rest of the summer. I spent so much time, energy, and money making your day perfect. You could at least keep me updated.
No. 1616590
can someone tell me if i'm being a bitch here?
i don't vent very often to friends but i had a pretty horrible breakdown yesterday, crying at work and everything which i never do, about some family stuff. i'm okay now but i wanted to tell a friend just because i had no idea how to handle the situation. they were there for me, they always are.
but i swear every time i have something like this, where a horrible thing happens to me, the very next day THEY have a breakdown too. i so rarely complain about my life problems while they complain about theirs a lot, it can get overwhelming, and idk if they're trying to "one up" me or somehow make me feel better by the fact they're having a crisis too, i've just noticed it happens every time i have a big problem i talk to them about. the next day or sometimes just a few hours later they also have some big crisis and spam me with texts. like i didn't check my phone for awhile and she sent me 40 texts complaining about something annoying her at work
i'm just like … can i get some time to recover, what are you doing, is this on purpose???
No. 1616605
>>1616590what the other nonna said is right: you opened up to her so she feels safe to do it around you. it's alright to rely on someone to get some comfort when having hard times but expect the same person to rely on you too sometimes. I personally don't mind comforting my friends that I know that will comfort me eventually because it just makes me happy helping them to feel better or find solutions for their problems. just be there for her and make sure you get what she is going through, that's more than enough. only give advice or suggestions if she asks for it.
>>1616603a roach infested apartment is better than a retard infested mansion. you can always kill the roaches.
No. 1616610
>>1616603You sound like you’re struggling with burnout in regards of your sister. Are you both living with your parents? Would you be able to pool money together and escape together? You might be able to afford a less shitty place if you combined force, and if your parents are
abusive, the distance would give you both the space to heal.
No. 1616619
>>1616615I'm trying so fucking hard, I even found a place but then the roommate backed out because she found herself something nicer, but I'm really struggling trying to search while working all the time
>>1616610She has no money because of her health problems and I already gave up so much of my youth to take care of her. I want to finally live my own life and live for myself, I don't want to just leave one shithole for something worse
No. 1616628
>>1616537 > he is in his 30s and says he doesn't know what HPV isThey don't test men for hpv because apparently testing on men is too inconsistent. So they get to silently spread hpv and then act like.. wait what even what is hpv?? I totes don't have it!
They just don't know if they have it. But if he's your only sexual partner he might want to take that on board. In the absence of tests for men they might want to at least listen when partners report having it. Idk what strain you have but I've had one of the cancer causing ones and cleared it in about 2 years while just monitoring my cell changes. The only advice they had was not to smoke (I didn't anyway) because that plays a role in how your immune system deals with it.
No. 1616654
File: 1687637389398.jpg (86.79 KB, 680x680, Fx3KaErWwAA59WM.jpg)
>>1615636I feel you, nonna. I remember someone complaining about KF scrotes and their racism here. Someone replied "I only bash blacks, not other races" or something, then quickly deleted it and tried to rephrase it when he was called out, but screenshots were posted anyway. That told me everything about how infiltrated this place has become. I think it's gotten even worse since it moved off the clearnet, because 40% of them are legitimately too stupid to know how to access an onion site.
You can always tell when it's a KF user because they racebait hard, and when someone asks "What's with all the racebait?", they rush to claim it's all LSA posters even though most of the posts are literally bashing and antagonizing black people, or the most obvious bait possible. They're like bots or something, nothing in their brains and no actual reasoning behind their tactics.
Also, when I see posters who disagree with the racist spergs get yelled at or chided for "racebaiting", it's honestly no different to me from if an anon got chided for disagreeing with misogyny. Both strike me as retarded, like some attempt to "make peace" with people who hate women at the end of the day (and yeah, if you spend your days attacking black women, you are a misogynist, the same way if you spent your days attacking redheaded or Arab or tall women, you would still be a misogynist lmao).
I wish all racist scrotes and pickmes would fuck off, they are a blight on every internet community.
No. 1616657
So I left be my mom but it's she's been so viciously mean and cynical lately. Not just to me, but to my little sister. It's not like I expect my mom to be happy go lucky all the time as I know that's a bias often put on women, but I feel like my mom is really frustrated at her work and also with our dad and I feel like she's taking it out on me and my sister. Even though we are all adults, I still like to hang out with my mother because I love her but she says such abhorrently toxic shit sometimes it makes me not wanna be around her.
For example today my mom was telling me that when I got a "real job", I would finally stop using such immature language (maybe she means me cussing, also sometimes I say cringe internet speak IRL which bothers her). But anyways my mom started going on this rant about when I would finally get a real job and 'grow up', and stop being so cringy. I don't even disagree with everything she says, but she was so harsh about it as if she's been thinking about it for years and she finally just snapped and started ranting about it.
It's also my little sister's birthday soon, and I mentioned getting her some silver jewelry cause that's her favorite thing right now and my mom started going on about how she "knows she wouldn't like that stuff"? Even though I know that's what my sister likes. She has said it before.
Anyways, without going into extra details basically my dad is a POS but my mom never starts shit with him. Men get away with anything and life is fucked. Mom I still love you but I wish you'd realize me and my sister, while we are not perfect, we are not the ones out to get you and I wish you'd treat us better, sometimes….
No. 1616670
>>1616654I think it's kiwi/4chan users because they are obsessed with two things, troons and black people. They will find a way to bring up race/black people no matter what. They also have a odd obession of bringing up "tyrones bbc" or "cucking" by black men. I think I know the difference between someone from lsa who wandered here wanting to speak on black related topics vs. Literal dick obsessed racists.
Poc live in their head rentfree, when the biggest threat to their online spaces is usually white scrotes in dresses.
No. 1616702
File: 1687641839752.gif (682.57 KB, 220x201, rip-juice-cry.gif)
>Be me.
>I am gonna be so emotionally strong today, nothing can stop me!
>Someone says something to me in a slightly "weird tone"
Pic rel is me rn
No. 1616754
File: 1687645807756.png (76.98 KB, 500x477, 1637056933012.png)
Went too far down the bizarre twitter rabbit hole and found what looks like some Chinese woman fingering her cat. I'm going to report it, but I'm sure Twitter will just delete it and not actually report her to any animal welfare groups. I feel sick, I hate humans.
No. 1616833
>>1616823Congratulations, i wasn't calling out you like specifically tho. Not having them at any point doesn't mean you don't have it tho.
>>1616829Yeah its more deadly for women. A high percentage of men have hpv in the throat.
No. 1616844
i'm not gonna say shit IRL because it's not a big deal, but
>currently live in fixer-upper
>bfs parents want to sell the house soon, cool, we'd like to move and don't like the area much
>roof redone, looks nice
>gotta replace the shitty floors, ok cool
>time to rip up the floor, carpet gone, nice, some of the kitchen floor ripped up, but still have a ways to go
>bfs parents fighting constantly the entire time according to him, not unusual but annoying so i leave the house early if i know they're coming
>his dad constantly bitching about the house, you guys are the ones who decided to play fixer-upper with this house with your son, and i clean constantly because i like cleaning
>not to mention they bought this house in florida in 2020 and they've had to repair a lot of stuff during hurricane season each year
>they go on vacation down to their OTHER house in florida and it will be at least a week until they're back? and they let us know the day before they left. what happened to ripping up the floor
>now they want to buy ANOTHER house nearby as a fixer-upper, yeah fuck letting millennial couples get a house! let's make it more expensive to own.
>seem to have a chip on their shoulder about the money my parents make (they just paid off their mortgage) when they've been frugal and worked their asses off for about 30 years and my mom has two jobs, we never really ate out, never vacationed anywhere but the next state over, never bought fancy gadgets and DIY'd everything in their house to save money
god i can't stand boomers. at least my bf is the one bringing up the shit that bothers him so i can agree without coming off like i'm attacking them. a lot of anons here struggling to get your own home, remember boomers have a ton to do with that. they don't want you to own your own home, they want to play real estate agent and HGTV fixer upper in the most lazy way possible to make money to blow on stupid shit and likely won't leave anything for their children. also who the fuck wants to do intensive house work in their 70s?
No. 1616856
File: 1687654542785.jpg (136.59 KB, 1080x717, tumblr_9a59d9dd116fe082a657c8f…)
>>1616411I literally did the same and started community college, completing my first semester at age 22. Life seems so stagnant when you're a NEET with no way to travel or gain new experiences. Just last year I started being able to order for myself without getting nervous or asking family to come with me. Think this way: time is going to pass no matter what, so wouldn't you rather work to accomplish something in that time instead of continuing to be stagnant?
For maturing and connecting with others, the honest truth is some people just don't click with others, or at least most people. Faking happiness sucks the happiness out of you, and someone will always have a problem no matter how you look or dress. It's a cliche answer, but really just be yourself. We don't owe society for being born when we never asked to be, but we owe it to ourselves to make the best life possible for us when so many generation before never had the chance.
Long story short: find what works for you while accepting you need to work around and with your environment. Getting rid of mindless distraction that make you feel like shit after doing is a good start, doesn't matter how many times you go back and reinstall or recreate accounts, eventually there will be a last time. Good luck!
No. 1616963
>>1616910I used to do that too, but now I'm thinking of returning and bringing a lot of what I got from here with me. I used to back down with criticism, especially during the cancel culture era, but online anonymous message boards have taught me to fight back and stand up for myself because there's not much to lose. Maybe just see it that way, too. I got my confidence back and feel sure the criticisms here are far more intelligent and harsh than any soft Twitterite could give me.
Twitter has a tendency to go for people that seem weak to make them bend the knee. If you don't bend, even on unpopular or politically "incorrect" opinions, they don't know what to do with you.
No. 1616964
>>1616963every time i've made a twitter i delete it within a few months. i prefer the anonymity. it's easier to be attacked when anyone can see all your other posts on an account and point out any little inconsistency. you can vent about something bad in your life one day then piss someone off another day and they will use that against you.
i just stick to imageboards, mostly this one
No. 1616969
File: 1687667893812.jpg (72.43 KB, 689x384, 1627039564439.jpg)
i want him to text me, i want him to tell me he's sorry about everything and wants to be my bf. it's been like 4 days and i miss him, but i know it shouldn't happen. i'm better without abusive scrotes. i know everything was wrong, yet i still expect closure or apologies, knowing it will only make the cycle start again. it's hard to cope with this when you have no one to talk to, but i want to show myself i'm an adult and that i can do it. i'm not going to text him, because i don't have anything to say, i just want somebody to talk to.
No. 1616972
>>1616964I completely understand that. I was like you for the longest time. You are not losing much by not being on Twitter, Facebook, TikTok or any other social media platform. It's like their audience is too big, so anyone can find your post, such as communities that'll oppose your opinion for sure.
If you ever return, try smaller communities that have been popping up like cohost or neocities if you like an old web feeling. Nobody is going to care what drama or "canceling" happens on a backwaters website and they're mostly female dominant.
No. 1616975
>>1616972was thinking about making a shitty dinky html website for fun, for posting art and stuff. i wish to get away from the hysterical normies on social media, they ruined the internet. wish i was a bit older so i got to experience the old days more. imageboards lately are still better, but hate when normies obviously have to announce themselves by not understanding the culture. fucking hate when youtubers bring up lolcow or obviously use threads here for information for a video on a cow.
>>1616973this is why i openly snark on trannies around other women because they either are like "omg, THANK you, i think the same thing" or they're quiet and too scared to say anything, but maybe it would sow some seeds of doubt in their minds about men invading our spaces
No. 1616992
>>1616973I have kind of wondered if they're intimidated. I think it's actually a women's first instinct to either run and tell other women or coddle a man when they aggressively invade a female space because they're scared on a deeper level, even if they don't know it.
We see the same thing in gay vs lesbian bars. Gay men are indifferent or laugh at TIFs, but lesbians are deeply intimidated and either bend the knee or get full male rage and protests if they don't. I genuinely am starting to see handmaiding like this as a type of defense mechanism. As much as handmaidens make me angry and deeply frustrate me, I just can't hate them. It's always the male that's in the wrong.
No. 1617032
>>1617026Nona, don't use dating apps at all. Join all the gendercritical communities online, especially ones with mostly women. Ask and learn where to find wlw in real life. It's the only way.
Just so you know, dating apps are overwhelmingly statistically male but you probably figured that out already. Some female profiles are not even real and are made by the companies themselves.
No. 1617034
File: 1687679661063.jpg (43.75 KB, 640x640, 29b5ce3b5b6dcfd7e461df2c06b8df…)
>notice that I get thirstier at night, especially before bed
>Google it because of course I do
>Results saying it could be diabetes
It's only scary cause I really could have diabetes. My BMI is 31 (obese) and I have a sweet tooth, damn near a sugar addiction. Yeah yeah I know sugar isn't what causes diabetes but still. Both my grandma and great grandma have it. I've suspected it for a while but I'm too fucking scared to go see a doctor about it and it's not like I can just figure it out on my own.
No. 1617054
File: 1687684679539.jpeg (40.98 KB, 828x602, A91D15F5-E869-4A68-B2A3-4CEC5C…)
>>1617034Take it easy with the sugar and carbs anon. Eat stuff with high protein instead, it’ll keep you fuller longer and great for before and after exercise. Add some veggies and fruit in your diet too. Please take care of yourself
No. 1617109
File: 1687691589854.jpg (63.01 KB, 563x524, I get you nonnie.jpg)
>>1617034Nonna I know it can be very hard to hear the truth, but avoidant people like us only end up torturing themselves with speculation and negative thoughts. Delaying it will take a toll on your health, both physical and mental, so please take some time to schedule a meeting today, before it has a chance to progress. Good luck, and take care of yourself ♥ You can get your health back on track
No. 1617169
>>1617161If you knew my mom you'd go yeah. She is also super neurotic and made my entire break up about her and how I did not tell her about it enough when all she ever has to say to me is negative or mean s
* also she is a massive pick me I don't know why you guys think she is based all she cares about is sucking up to men
No. 1617182
>>1617036Because I could have diabetes. I've also been a hypochondriac my entire life so whenever something is wrong with me I seesaw between "nothing is wrong with you, you're overinflating your symptoms" and "I could literally die right now".
>>1617052>>1617090>>1617109>>1617054Thank you Nonna's for being so kind. I'm actually currently trying to do a deficit of 1300 calories a day and I try to limit myself to one sweet thing a day. I know you all are right and that the embarrassment and shame isn't worth my health, but it's hard to do. If I do have it, I'll know I'll hate myself forever for doing this to myself. Anyway I'm going to buy a glucometer.
No. 1617239
>>1617229Anon, never apologize, and delete only if a person hasn't been online and couldn't see it yet, that's exactly what gives a dramatic flavor to things. Ideally, think very carefully before messaging exes or anyone related, especially if you hesitate even a little, it's always better to sleep on it.
Either way, what you've done is not a catastrophy. People do and say far more embarrassing stuff, forget about it and move on. That was just an impulse based on a fleeting emotion, wasn't it? Just try to control it next time, that's it.
No. 1617246
>>1617102Thank you Nona ;-;
I’m moving to a southern city with an old lesbian bar so hopefully my baste wife lies in wait for me.
>>1617032I know they’re absolute garbage but I’m too emotionally raw to form an anon connection for months (and last two relationships were ldrs that crumbled so I’m definitely nervous)
(;-; ) No. 1617266
>>1617260This. Not the OP but
>>1617263 Anon and my friend has used her diagnosis for an excuse for her substance misuse and to get extensions on school work. It is so frustrating to raw dog the world as a ND person and see people using it as a crutch for their lack of disciple and maturity. Being an adult is difficult sure but if you’re functional enough to get into college or work a job means you’re functional enough to excel. Maybe it’s muh internalized ableism but it really drives me nuts.
No. 1617271
>>1617026Anon you’re so similar to me. I’m bi put pretty right leaning and I absolutely cannot stand liberal women, in particular gay handmaidens who call me a
terf (even my actually lesbian best friend does this so god knows what it would be like attempting to date a woman like that). I hate scrotes and have no interest in dating any because of how they behave and treat women, so basically I’m alone forever. I just want a hot, intelligent, normal woman who is just that, NORMAL. I swear it’s so hard to find any insufferable gays anymore. Take me back to the 90s ffs
No. 1617273
>>1617268Same
nonnie. It's taking a lot to not text SO WE'RE OVER NOW but I'm actually fed up having the same fight and always been the one to fold. Especially when it's my patent just got diagnosed for cancer. Why care
No. 1617277
File: 1687712065592.jpg (33.36 KB, 564x240, x240.jpg)
>weird character from Goat Story making its rounds on twittor again
>misogynistic render of female character meant to be degrading for humor purposes
>gay men absolutely losing their shit
Are they all this autistic and weird
No. 1617282
File: 1687712847523.jpeg (18.99 KB, 750x815, 3E3F7177-F2FB-42DE-936E-875DE8…)
i think i heard my brother having sex yesterday and I wanna die
No. 1617292
excited to stop dating scrotes. wasting my time when I have school and a career to focus on, quite frankly.
met a guy who morphed into the perfect version of someone I could see myself building a future with. we had a convo over the phone and it was like a flip switched–he started telling me all this nasty shit about himself, culminating in the revelation that his ex-wife's breasts were too small for him to stick his microdick between when she was pregnant with his daughters. And she wasn't particularly enthusiastic about it….gee, I wonder why, dumbass? I can't believe I just typed thatout, I am beyond revolted still. He didn't want to have sex with her unless she'd been pregnant with a son, because his son would one day be doing the same thing…I was too stunned to speak initially. This woman sacrificed her damn body to give birth to your children, and this is how you repay her. That, and bragging about how you poison your daughter's mind against her mother. Apparently she hates how her mother always has to work since they got divorced, but she thinks he's saving the world.
yeah fucking right, saving the world. he inflates his position in the realm he works in, it's all delusional narcissistic bullshit. I finally called him out on all these things specifically last night and it felt so good to bruise his ego.
I can't wait to do better than he ever did in the field we both work in.
No. 1617298
File: 1687715426372.jpg (31.08 KB, 564x699, oh.jpg)
Nonnies, I need some good advice. How do you deal with stress? It sounds generic, but I've had a very tough few months where I was constantly tense and on edge. I'm fixing my life bit by bit and everything seems stable for now, but stress-wise it's like nothing changed at all. My back is constantly tense, heartbeat randomly picks up and I feel pressure on my throat that's even more apparent when I lay down. It feels terrible and makes me emotional when I think about it.
I'm used to feeling stressed, but this is the first time where it feels like my body can't handle it anymore. I understand that after such a long time of this being the norm, things won't change instantly, but when can I expect it to subside? Have i fucked up? Please give me tips on how to help myself along a bit I could really use it right now
No. 1617308
File: 1687717731734.jpeg (122.77 KB, 828x1030, IMG_2950.jpeg)
>>1617298Eat soup go outside touch animals dissociate to the sound of rain scream into your pillow find a hobby you like and partake in it while playing something in the background like a movie or music dress up different exercise just let yourself cry. Like a big fat long cry with heaving sobs that’s your monke brain’s natural way of expelling pent up emotions it releases endorphins so you’ll feel better for a bit
No. 1617321
>>1617311I know better now, I completely agree. I hadn’t been dating for a long time, and he really made himself seem like a true match in the beginning so I didn’t think much of the situation. I never wound up meeting them and we only discussed that once, which I actually appreciated cos I assumed that meant he wasn’t going to make me into a mom figure to suit his own interests. I actually liked how he good of a dad he seemed to be until I caught wind of the resentment as he opened up more.
>>1617317Really disgusts me. I feel angry at how caught off guard I was. I’d already been feeling pretty hopeless before this, but now it’s more solidified. At the same time, I’m not looking at the future with dread. I mostly just wanted a partner cos I lost my parents young (I’m late 20s) and I have no family. It scares me to think it could always be this way, so I thought I’d make my own family instead. I decided I could just focus on helping women and children with my career instead, and focus on cultivating friendships and mentoring. Once I accepted that, I felt instantly at peace.
No. 1617353
File: 1687722269200.jpg (42.64 KB, 400x533, tumblr_c6068a6a72834589f07ec58…)
I've been feeling some inexplicable dread for the past few days, even though nothing happened. Haven't had that in a while lol.
No. 1617357
File: 1687722629165.jpg (44.03 KB, 384x384, 5898465.jpg)
I'm starting to realize more and more how my mother is like a 12 year old in an adult woman's body. It's really starting to grate on me, I know she has her own issues and deep-seated traumas that made her that way. I used to defend her all the time to my older sister when she'd speak critically of her and how angry she made her. But now I feel like I'm able to see things more clearly instead of being blinded by a mixture of love and codependency after going to therapy. Instead of continually making excuses for her and how she behaves. Instead of always choosing to only focus on the positives, on the ways she didn't fail as a parent and failed to protect us from our abusive father. (Not to mention how she still defends him to this day/is largely in denial of his abusive behavior.)
I see now more clearly how deeply flawed, immature, neurotic and sad of a woman she is, and how she depends on us instead of us depending on her. Instead of getting any better with age, my mother seems to be returning to an even more infantile state now that all her children have grown into adulthood and her husband is deceased. She seems almost entirely incapable of running her own life at all and instead makes my older sister (and I, to a lesser extent) do almost all 'adult' tasks for her. (Outside of literally cooking and cleaning for her) It's actually maddening to witness. Her addictions and neuroticism are only getting more intense and she seems more emotional, helpless and clingy than ever before. I still love my mother to death, but It's painful to become more fully aware of how much of a disaster she actually is. I'm also starting to be able to feel angry with her, but then feel guilty for feeling angry with her. Since in part I feel like I'm angry at a child. Which is the wrong way to think, she's literally an adult AND my parent at that. I need to hold her accountable, but fucking christ. She's my mother, but in some ways she feels more like a baby sister. I feel a mixture of anger and sadness when I think of that.
No. 1617377
>>1617354>way behind in life compared to peersYep, here.
From ages 18-25 I felt like a failure and didnt know what I wanted to do. But I just kept going to university, taking a few classes that interested me, while living at home and going to work part-time so I didn't recurr too much debt. It's pretty embarrassing meeting up with old high school mates and finding out they had already graduated from undergrad, doing their masters, etc. while I had just finished my 2nd year courses. The people who graduated within 4-5 years didn't have much time to breathe, probably regretted going into a career they weren't interested in because they haven't put much thought into what they wanted to do, and some of them still haven't realized their goals yet. There was one friend from high school who's still trying to get into medical school after completing undergrad, and another who's trying to get into the teacher education program. I had finally graduated this year. It took me 8 years and sometimes I feel a little embarrassed that it took me this long but it is what it is… during those 8 years I had finally figured out my passions and interests are, did co-op internships that improved my hireability after graduation, and got into extracurriculars that would improve my chances of going into grad school. Now I got a great paying job with full benefits right after graduation, and just bought my first home because of how much money I saved living at parents. Also I just got my drivers license a few days. So yeah, 26 y/o was the big W age for me. I kinda think of myself as a late bloomer because I hadn't been reaching my goals until now. I think it's perfectly okay to go at life at your own pace and the best thing to do is to not compare yourself to other people. As long as you're constantly striving for something you will get there eventually, even if it will take some patience. Good luck, nona!!!
No. 1617401
I feel so stupid and broken nonnas. I spent my entire life clinging on to one friend group for nearly all of my needs (social, emotional,etc) and now that we're in our late 20s and life changes have started to affect us, I feel like I am now going to be the one left alone in the end, craving the good ole days where I could shoot the shit with the few people I truly felt like myself around. The only other person in the friend group who has placed as much value in it as I have, (albeit as not to such an autistic degree) currently lives abroad and is seeking to find some new friends there so it's only a matter of time til she also moves on. Everyone else in the friend group has managed to make friends outside of it that they can at least hang out with. Due to my mental illnesses and autism I have only ever managed to make acquaintances outside of my circle and while it bothered me, I used to tell myself that it's fine because at least, I still have my close friends. We told each other that we will try to be lifelong friends no matter what, and I really believed it but now I am coming to the realization that just because they will make promises doesn't mean it will be kept. They have helped me so much over the years, and they are one of my sources of motivation to keep going. But now, I feel like I'm having a crisis. Most of my dreams for what I want out of life involve them in some capacity. When I think of owning my own space, I think of being able to invite them, when I think of finding a spouse, I think of them being at my wedding. I want to go on trips with them. I want to be able to tell them about whatever adventures I have. I'm not so delusional that I expect us to be together 24/7 or that they will be able to support me whenever I need it especially as we're all older now, and working in different fields. But I just dont want it all to fade away. What do I do?
No. 1617418
File: 1687726852373.jpeg (120.47 KB, 1170x1152, 34BE065B-FA67-4C5D-9E79-580FF4…)
My job sucks and I’ll be the first to get laid off probably within a year.
I have no relationship. I have to move out of where my friends and my support system is — the place that feels like home to me — because I didn’t get this new job I wanted and I don’t make enough money.
I’m going to have to try to make friends as a 33 year old from a state like California. I’m sure they’ll love that.
I gained 30 lbs from losing my adhd med access, stress from family death and such. I just eat and eat and eat and it doesn’t even help but compulsively I do it anyway.
I just went to give up and rot. I know objectively it’s not too late to turn things around but I feel so listless and hopeless.
No. 1617459
>>1617369Damn
nonny, I’m a hardcore daily medical user and any edible over 60mg fucks me up (and I frequently consume 30-40 mg of edible in a day). Your friend kinda fucking sucks for not telling you how powerful that gummy was, this is why I can understand my state limiting the amount of THC allowed in edibles to 100 mg per PACK - the highest dose a single gummy can have is 10mg. Stuff like this is sadly super common, people being given edibles with insane dosages and having a terrible time.
No. 1617509
File: 1687732197618.jpeg (32.72 KB, 397x298, 2687C356-2DDC-46C8-BCDE-73D7F7…)
A few years ago I got cancelled by a decently sized portion of my online crafter's circle for saying that I block all men on sight. If they view my stories or show up in my feed I block them. This pissed off all the dangerhaired genital mutation retards who in all their fevered femininity somehow identify as outright male, and were ANGRY that I didn't block them because it means they must be women "to me". No shit you're women, you big-hipped, women's-crafting, hair-bleaching-during-a-meltdown, makeup-wearing, period-having, born-with-a-uterus, jewelry-making, plant-mom, sultry-topless-photoshoot-taking, hormonal-chin-hair-growing, stereotypical-fat-deposit-having, XX-chromesome fuckin' LADY!!!!!! Goddamn I hate the boobless crew, and it'll be so funny so have a glaring fucking red flag be so conveniently stamped across the chests of all these tantrum-tossing WOMEN in the future when they navigate through this world of mostly sane people. It still pisses me off though when I encounter a (unbeknownst to me) handmaiden, follow her because I like her quilt coasters and have her softblock me because she was part of the ~Queer Discord for Crafters~ when this went down.
I still block all men, but now I also avoid the piss outta anyone with pronouns on her page.
No. 1617510
File: 1687732328290.gif (735.55 KB, 500x223, IMG_5812.gif)
>>1617459That helps alot to have a reference for tolerance. I dont think my friend thought anything of it until I was like “I need to go home”. They took care of me though. She drove and then gave me home made cookies and put on LOTR 2 towers while I fell asleep. Now I know my limits and will avoid social situations with edibles. My friend has a high tolerance and even though i regularly split js with friends I was not ready for the gummy. I got-got.
No. 1617556
File: 1687737099713.jpg (6.81 KB, 216x233, 1683208559470.jpg)
i dont understand how i keep attracting the most obnoxious internet moids. no we are not friends, we only talked once, i am under no obligation to message you again. stop pestering me.
No. 1617560
>>1617354I had a genuinely bleak,
abusive, and joyless childhood and I feel lucky to still be here (I mean, I guess) because the friends I had who had similar childhoods all died at least five years ago, be it overdose or suicide. I had a period where things were going okay, happy-ish even, which was followed by a major nosedive that im having a very hard time continuing through. That said, it's not all that I am or all my life will amount to. I, you, and anyone else who suffered a lot as kids deserve to be here and take up room just as much as the silverspooned, sheltered cunts that make fun of us for not being like, super successful or whatever. Never measure your life by those around you, anyone can pull themselves out of the trenches but you have to make a conscious decision to do so. Sometimes you have to gray rock through people hurting you, or trying to tolerate a shitty job, or having a hard time seeing a future where you will ever meet someone who isn't actively trying to hurt you. It's a horrible feeling that's hard to describe, but giving in to your own negative thoughts or indulgences only lets anyone who has ever tried to harm you win. You are already doing a radical act of defiance against the people who see you or treat you as dirt just by continuing to exist even if you don't want to. Manage your expectations, don't let the progress of others govern your own frivolous emotions, never act impulsively, and always make sure you are taking care of in the most basic way (shelter, income, food, hygiene) and that is enough. Above all dont actively try to hurt other people out of embitterment from your own childhood and you're doing light-years better than many people who grow up with tons of privileges.
No. 1617658
File: 1687746348699.jpeg (18.27 KB, 400x400, IMG_9897.jpeg)
An injury I got a few days ago is infected. Had to get a tetanus shot and am on antibiotics. Today the symptoms are in full swing and my mom wants to make it all about her and say I am being “mean”. Just what I want to do while throwing up with a 100° fever …. Fight with her. Fucking kill me.
No. 1617681
File: 1687747301789.jpg (267.95 KB, 1400x1400, e3505812cb30f007164e34789b1e7e…)
I keep getting bad headaches and migraines behind my one of my eyes (it alternates). my doctor gave me some migraine medication but I wish there was something I could do to stop them. I'm afraid they are going to get worse over time (irrational)
No. 1617690
>>1617258>I don’t believe fucking anyone who says they’re autistic anymore unless they’re mute or bang their heads against walls and shitat this point same, i have a cousin who has legitimate severe autism and acts like that and i've always been a little confused by people who say they're autistic but are still somewhat functioning. it's not that i don't believe that they're "different", i've known several people where i see it, but there's been a huge influx of girls for over five years now where they're maybe just a little quirky (and it doesn't seem genuine, they ham it up). i had an ex friend do this, suddenly she was "acting autistic" on purpose and doing things she never previously did. now she's attention whoring on tiktok, actually if you know that audio meme "fuck you my child is completely fine" she's the one who made it and it was basically mocking her parents for thinking she's mostly normal (we were friends for years, she honestly was normal)
for example, fixations- is it not easier than ever to fixate on a special interest because of the internet?
and look at the tourettes tiktok debacle, teachers and therapists who worked with adolescents were saying it was obviously a stupid trend, and that ticsandroses girl came out and admitted she was a faker.
and the field of psychology capitalizes on diagnosing and medicating people…
i could be diagnosed with at least 4 different mental illnesses if i wanted to right now, i just choose not to because i went through that system twice as a teenager and it did not help me. i am a decently functioning adult and don't feel the need to label myself, i am just me.
but yeah some people are genuinely mentally ill and benefit from the system.
No. 1617705
File: 1687751058743.png (175.3 KB, 944x960, 844.png)
I have no life. All I do besides work (I work from home) is lay in bed looking at my phone. I dont even message people, there is no one to message. All I do is doom scroll the news and wasted time looking up pointless questions on reddit. I don't know how to break this addiction. I can't stop. My life is already so tied to being online. I work online, pay my bills online, grocery shop online, my therapy sessions are online. Every important doc sent to me is paperless,online… I've tried cutting back, using lockdown apps and disabling my internet but I keep crawling back. I keep finding a way to gain access. I'm afraid that I'm going to let myself rot away like this.
No. 1617857
>>1617849Similar situation here. My bf is very loving, but he's so unbearably whiny. He won't complain or nag but he will ask a billion questions in a tone that implies I'm silly and dumb (he's an engineer who thinks he absorbed all of the world's wisdom despite being a sheltered little rich boy who has never had to work in retail, fast food or any other slave job like many of us other plebs). I've started to resent him for it.
Hope both of us can get a job and gtfo soon, nonna. Manifesting it for you.
No. 1617864
>>1617857Mine too! He grew up with rich parents and got a job straight out of university which he's kept steady for several years, meanwhile the pandemic fucked me over and I've been struggling ever since to find a company who wants to hire me for a permanent position or even full time. Meanwhile my boyfriend whines that he's bored of his job and wants to quit it so he can pursue an art career or just live on social benefits while doing 3D stuff, hoping that once I get a job I will be able to provide for us both somehow, fuck that. Let's manifest ourselves a good job and a peaceful single life together.
>>1617861Thank you, nonna! Our relationship was so much better in the beginning when we lived apart. I would honestly consider keeping the relationship going with my bf as long as we didn't live together. I know he will never accept that and at this point I won't even bring it up when we finally do break up, but you could always suggest to your bf that you'd like to keep your lives separate to a degree. I think it greatly helps you both focus on the positives in each other rather than the negatives of living together.
No. 1617870
>>1617354Yes, probably doxing myself but I don't care. I emigrated to a new country in my teens all by myself and had basically no rights, didn't speak the language and couldn't get into university because they only accepted people with IB and native high school diplomas. People were also pretty racist so I had to change my last name in order to get anywhere in life.
I worked a bit as a cleaner and somehow managed to get into a local community college when everyone already had their bachelor's, graduate summa cum laude, and get a decent job despite it being 10x harder to get hired for me compared to natives. Stayed there until I got citizenship, then went to a real university for my master's. Just accepted an offer for a great job in the field I'm passionate about, about to relocate to the UK. Got my ex-simp to pay for my therapy which has helped immensely and now I no longer have awful self-esteem or anger issues.
You can do it nonna, if I could go through all that shit and come out the other end a winner, so can you. I'm not even particularly smart or pretty, just extremely spiteful and stubborn.
No. 1617885
>>1617681Sorry if this is unwanted advice or things you've already tried before but my bf suffers from migraines a lot and what helps him the most is rubbing some lavender oil on his temples. Apparently vitamin B helps too.
Oh and here's something I learned recently:
Harvard University did a study about the colour spectrum and how it impacts a brain that is dealing with a migraine. They found that even with blind patients, if they exposed them to the colour blue it caused more pain for them.
Something about how the way that your brain has to process through the retina to the cortex and the signals that have to be sent that way. Red and blue both require a larger signal in that process, which makes migraines worse, and the best colour is green because it requires a smaller signal. Something along those lines.
https://hms.harvard.edu/news/green-light-migraine-reliefBest of luck to you nonna I hope any of that can help whatsoever.
No. 1617909
>>1617905It's been that way since I started using imageboards in my teens, and it's really unhealthy. Over time I started internalizing some of the things people would say and got in a really bad way mentally. I was offline all the way during the pandemic and it really helped,
nonny I suggest you do the same.
No. 1617927
File: 1687781134204.jpeg (16.08 KB, 392x350, _ (3).jpeg)
Just found out yet another one of my friends trooned out. She was the only gnc woman I knew who despite being very left-leaning wasn't utterly retarded. But I guess going to art school and being isolated in a foreign country while only being around mentally ill tranny classmates does that to you.
No. 1618026
File: 1687792545199.jpg (474.88 KB, 1071x1068, 1599053387334.jpg)
My cat died a few days ago, he died in his sleep. For a long time he was one of reasons why I didn't want to kill myself (if not the only one sometimes) and I couldn't be there for him. I arrived home just 2 days after he died, I don't live alone so he had someone there with him but still. I can't get over the fact that I will never pet his fur again. I think I'm feeling lonelier than ever, nobody gets me and most people stay away from me like they know that something is wrong with me. I'm supposed to move on, keep working, being normal, but I'm kinda done. I'm so tired.
No. 1618039
I'm not happy and I don't think I'll ever be happy. It's not for lack of trying, in everyone's eyes I'm doing everything "right." I go to work, I maintain my hygiene, I don't drink to excess or self harm frequently anymore, I see a therapist every week. I'm just not happy. The amount of self-loathing I have is unbearable, living like this just isn't sustainable. I'm never comfortable, when out in public I can chalk it up to social anxiety but when I'm alone in my room I feel the same. Embarrassed, ashamed, like everyone is looking at me and that they just know I'm not normal or good. I ruined my body with inactivity and unhealthy habits growing up depressed and I think about it constantly. My breasts are hideous to me, I've almost always hated them and wore bras 24/7. Thought that I must be trans if I hated them so much so bound my chest for a year or two, damaging the tissue and elasticity. And then having ana-chan phases in high school, gaining and losing weight so far, also probably affected the elasticity. I'm skinnyfat and my age is showing on my face faster than it is for my peers. Could be genetics but I wouldn't doubt the mental suffering and physical neglect playing a big part in that. I want to be loved and cared for but I don't think I'm capable of romantic love, I think I was at some point but that first person ruined me. I can't understand when people are kind to me just because they like me as a person. It shocks me every time, like what do you gain from it? Objectively speaking my personality is fine and I have some good qualities but I just have so much hatred for myself that I can't fathom being treated well. I don't want to live like this forever, I can't. As long as my dog is alive I will take care of him
No. 1618043
File: 1687794832471.jpg (87.3 KB, 773x699, 836a98b1cf5e42d92b5d80d2e39101…)
I've been dooming so bad over the state of the world.. I feel like there's no future for me here, I keep thinking of just dying but I don't want to hurt my friends.
No. 1618044
>>1618043I feel the same way sometimes too. nonna. Please stick around. The only good thing about the unpredictable nature of the future is the fact that it might not be as bad as it seems it could be. There's no way to tell what precisely might occur over time.
Feel that pain, but also reject it defiantly. Don't allow it to take over your mind and life. I'm able to say that confidently today, and I might not be able to believe in this sentiment as much tomorrow. But I feel for you, and I can't help but believe we have to reject this compulsion to succumb to the rot around us.
No. 1618046
>>1618043I feel the same way sometimes too. nonna. Please stick around. The only good thing about the unpredictable nature of the future is the fact that it might not be as bad as it seems it could be. There's no way to tell what precisely might occur over time.
Feel that pain, but also reject it defiantly. Don't allow it to take over your mind and life. I'm able to say that confidently today, and I might not be able to believe in this sentiment as much tomorrow. But I feel for you, and I can't help but believe we have to reject this compulsion to succumb to the rot around us.
>>1618043 No. 1618047
>>1618043I feel the same way sometimes too. nonna. Please stick around. The only good thing about the unpredictable nature of the future is the fact that it might not be as bad as it seems it could be. There's no way to tell what precisely might occur over time.
Feel that pain, but also reject it defiantly. Don't allow it to take over your mind and life. I'm able to say that confidently today, and I might not be able to believe in this sentiment as much tomorrow. But I feel for you, and I can't help but believe we have to reject this compulsion to succumb to the rot around us.
No. 1618054
>>1617712I really want to try that. I've been trying to leave my house for a long time. Going to the library is a good idea. I really need a reason and I need to read things other than my phone.
I found a new app called Freedom that locks down my phone without giving me an option to reopen it. It actually fucked me over today. I had a therapy session and couldn't get into the link. (A phone call worked and I had my session, thank god.) But that shows that the app worked. Even tutning my phone off and restarting did not shut it off.
For now, I'm only giving myself internet access on my phone during my lunch breaks, mainly for checking email/ ordering things I need. The only apps I'm allowing are my phone and spotify. Nothing more.
Wish me luck everyone, I need to break this addiction and get my life back. If anyone has any more tips that would be appreciated.
No. 1618063
File: 1687797737544.jpg (40.05 KB, 843x800, 098.jpg)
Where can I find a guy who would want me to whip him from time to time and would be overall submissive in bed and would worship me but seem quite masculine, stern and brooding outside of the bedroom? Please god ughhhhhhh
No. 1618064
>>1617705go out and try taking a walk while listening to music (in one earbud) during the day. are there are nice parks or natural areas to walk in near you? or it might be nice to walk around just to get more familiar with where you live.
>>1618063it seems like you have to groom one yourself. get to work on choosing your
victim nonny.
No. 1618070
I was waiting so long to buy a decent graphic tablet and I even ordered it and now it's the last day I can pay for it and I'm still scared to do it. I had to spent so much money on doctors and medical tests, way more than I planned, and now I'm scared to buy the tablet. It's not that I don't have the money, I probably have more savings than an average person my age, but I was raised a poorfag and I'm scared of spending money on things that aren't necessary for survival. I feel guilty every time I do it. Sometimes it even makes me paranoid, I think 'what if you get seriously sick or you will lose your apartament? You're going to need extra cash, that 100 bucks can make a huge difference in the future!' and my mind goes crazy. I know that not buying this tablet pushes my dream of becoming a digital artist even further into the future, I waited for too long anyway. On the other had, I had a plan to save a certain amount of money before my birthday and the plan already failed because of my unexpected medical tests, and now also this tablet, I would go even lower, and I would have to save for like 6 months to get to that amount I had before… I don't know what to do, I know I will feel bad about my decision regardless of what I choose
No. 1618080
>>1617676Queefing is when air goes
out, I'm talking about air going
in No. 1618084
File: 1687800210311.gif (951.67 KB, 245x150, dying.gif)
You can't turn back time. There is no way to redo parts of your life, to do things differently, to prevent things that have already happened from happening. The world will continue going forward, no matter how terrible conditions get, and there is nothing you can do. You'll get older, everyone you love gets older, dies, become different people, leave you. The only way out is death.
No. 1618095
File: 1687802078230.jpg (58.11 KB, 480x640, timemachinecat.jpg)
>>1618084Time is merely perception of reality. Hop in
nonnie.
No. 1618102
This is more of a rant than a vent and I'll let my 14y/o self talk:
My mind cannot understand how someone (mostly cosplayers and twitter artists) can only like the flavour of the month shit. It's not a matter of being a poser, it's a matter of…aren't people tired? At what point it stops being fun? Last month was Trigun, now it's Spiderman, before them it was Wednesday. I tend to judge people who hop on the last cool train because to me they look shallow and they're in a constant state of "please tell me what I have to like this month."
For cosplayers who are not OF whores, it also gets pretty expensive and stressful and at what point it starts being a chore more than fun? For artists, how do they do not burn out? I also kinda envy them for their strenght and it's a weird mix of feelings, I admire their dedication to give a lot of time and mental space to always be ready to pump out content the second a manga/anime/movie comes out, still I tend to judge them because they don't really like anything and I think that's sad…maybe I'm old but fandoms back some years ago used to last longer? Or at least their community wasn't about the hype but genuine interest? When people start doing shit only for the numbers that's when my interest of them drops and it's sad because by the time a second season of a show I like comes out, they already moved on. It's weird, I don't know how to explain it.
Bonus points if the fandoms has an attractive male or two attractive males because that's the only thing I will see on social media, no one really talks about the show per se.
Straight and lesbian couples don't get the same treatment, at least of what I saw, but maybe that's because twitter is filled with fujos.
Everything is for the clout and feels wrong to me, call me autistic but I cannot literally comprehend how someone would put themselves in that place
No. 1618144
File: 1687805452716.png (79.58 KB, 672x498, jhz08ehjf.png)
>>1618128I think you should try to talk it through with her calmly and apologize unless she really just said it to make you look bad. As a young child it could've seemed very scary to her and that's probably why she remembered it in the first place. My own sister once told me about how I hurt her by closing a door on her hand when she was 6 and I was 10 and I had no recollection of it, but I could imagine myself doing that in a rage and I apologized because she must've been thinking about that event a lot. It's kind of like pic related and I've experienced that myself with the awful things my parents have said or done to me that they then said never happened or they forgot.
No. 1618161
>>1618135>>1618142>>1618144Any semblance of respect between us is long dead. We never liked each other but ever since she resorted to name calling and called me sick in the head last year I lost all respect I had for her.
Yesterday I blew a gasket and for the first time I called her a retard. Today she was livid and in front of everyone called me a cunt, an asshole, an idiot and said I don't ever do anything useful. I silently waited for her to stop yelling, laughed and said "have you gone crazy?". So she started grabbing my arm and kept pulling me when I always made a point to never lay a single finger on her, since she is a child.
I think if it has escalated to a point she will start actually phisically fighting me, it's done.
No. 1618197
File: 1687809305912.png (52.99 KB, 542x417, c5f6dd9d7b2bc40d84604a63ae33bf…)
I'm not photogenic but I don't care much about my appearance anyway so it doesn't bother me. But man, my mom can not photograph me for shits. I went trough several family photos taken with different devices and I look so doofy on the ones that has been taken with my mom's phone. I don't look like a bombshell on the other photos either but at least I look like a regular human being instead of a goofy cartoon character. I might start asking my mom to take several photos of me next time she photographs me so I have different photos to chose from, but I hate to be that kind of persontaken several pictures is fine but I hate when people start larping as influencers and what several photos from different angles so they can analyse them all but I just can't stand how weird I look in my mom's photos. I mean my mom adores those photos so it's not like she is bothered by how goofy I look but it bothers me lol.
my mom don't know anything about photographing and always photographs from weird low angles, Bbut my dad doesn't know anything about photography either but I don't look weird on his photos. I guess it's because my mom wants me to pose so it always looks forced and weird on my part? I cant pose for shit eiter so it's kinda my own fault I look stupid. My mom's phone alll has the best camera so maybe my face just looks bad in HD
No. 1618218
>>1618197Old people don't really know how to into flattering phone angles. Half the time they barely understand how to use their phone. My mom also can't take a flattering picture of me to save her life, but can somehow manage decent with selfies.
You gotta coach your mom a little, they tend to take the picture head on, when usually people look better when the camera is held slightly up and tilted down. The phone lense is weird and does funky shit sometimes.
No. 1618290
File: 1687814467997.jpg (33.43 KB, 500x470, 1603515909218.jpg)
I am sick of men flaking on me. Do they think this is a fucking game? I am going to have sex. This is a threat.
No. 1618330
>>1617258>I never would have been friends with her if she was like this when I met her Me with my ex best friend who was an awesome person, but started getting worse and worse the longer she was in group therapy. She's not claiming to be autistic or anything, she's a normal person who just suddenly found the Fountain of Excuses and started behaving like shit. The 'group' is just a circlejerk of self-pity
>>1617260This. And it's not just autism they're exploiting.
No. 1618345
>>1618308Males are taught very different principles by everything around them their whole lives. This is why even gay men say getting a girlfriend is "the easiest thing in the world", because men are taught from a young age, socially and even from male family members, that women are extremely easy to manipulate. No, not ever man is taught this, but many are, and those that use imageboards or reddit etc are often exposed to and frequent communities that teach them how to manipulate women. If he was gaslighting you and lying to you, there isn't a single part of him that was real. No matter how real it felt or how attached you got, you were being given a pacifier at the barest minimum to palcate you and allow him to take what he wanted from you. I promise you, he is not thinking of you the way you are thinking of him. A new target has filled that space in his mind. And if he ever contacts you claiming he thinks of you all the time etc, that's just a tactic to get you back in a pliable position. Look after yourself and don't allow yourself to fall for whatever shit he's trying to sell you.
No. 1618346
>>1618330Samefag, I also called the group "a cult" multiple times to her
(because it's exactly how it sucked her in and affected her). I told her all I told you, how it's just an excuse, how it's a circlejerk, how gazing at your own navel is no way to spend a life. No effect.
Took a long break from her, but when we met again all she could talk about is the same old cult shit of dredging up your past for excuses for your present. Meanwhile, it was an unusually eventful year for me, and she did not ask me once what happened in my life. I distanced myself completely after that.
I have long been meaning to let off steam about this in the /g/ bestie trauma thread, but eh, it came out here
No. 1618351
File: 1687821662412.jpeg (82.39 KB, 634x870, B6010FEE-FBE3-49F8-B955-AEB889…)
I seriously feel like I’m not qualified for absolutely any job. Everything sounds complicated, even a fucking Pokémon content writer job looks like rocket science. And everyone wants at least 3 previous works like. Oh yeah, let me dig out my autistic ramblings about anime and Pokémon that I wrote between studying for a career I hate and being miserable because I’m a mess of a person.
Who the fuck has the time for that shit? Who the fuck is hiring someone to write articles about anime and paying them real dollaroos? Why do they make it seem like I should’ve known better and write about autistic shit as if that was worth the hassle after telling me for years that if a waste of time?
Seriously, even teaching jobs (I studied teaching because I’m a fucking retard) sound too complicated.
Just what the fuck should I do? I swear I could search for a cleaning job and the people hiring someone makes it sound like you’re going to be solving mathematical problems and fixing very complex nano-machines that must be completely perfect and ready to go in 2 to 4 days because of course, everyone wants you to write 9 to 12 articles per week, like how do I even know if that’s possible at all?
No. 1618363
File: 1687822255633.png (61.43 KB, 377x537, image_2023-06-26_193258898.png)
Considering leaving a bad employee review at my extremely small shitty workplace and lie about my role since I am the only one with my role.
Most of the employee reviews are also bad. Should I do it?
No. 1618380
>>1618128dumb of her to bring it up but it was in the heat of moment emotions coming out
it doesn't sound like you threatened her to me nor do i think you're "at fault" for anything but you probably should apologize to her and move on.
if you said something that hurt someone even if you don't mean to you'd apologize right? kinda like that. don't hold it against her too hard. she's 16 and you were probably just as dumb as her at that age
No. 1618400
>>1618376>People just want to feel untouchable. They are exchanging very real and very useful social networks for a fantasy. Nobody's untouchable. But a kiss kiss makes the hurt go away.
You will be touched. You will need a kiss. You will not get it from a shrink
No. 1618407
>>1618401Lol chill out
This isn't your personal thread I can write whatever I want
I have no idea why you're so pressed
No. 1618409
>>1618407You are annoying
Boomer spacer
No. 1618418
>>1617695I feel like they get better when I put my hand on my eye (my doctor told me that it didn't matter so I stopped doing it). I will try the patch method but am hopeful thank you.
>>1617885I will read this, thank you so much for the info! I wonder if blue light from technology is part of that? Very happy that my fav color is green.
>>1617903The soaps I use is eco friendly/naturalish but next time I will buy unscented and test it.
Thank you all so much, I just posted to complain into the void but I will update if any of these work. After a doctor told me that "some women just get chronic migraines and there is nothing to be done about it" I've been feeling incredibly frustrated and alone about it. I since changed doctors but it was definitely one of those "I hate men" moments.
No. 1618442
>>1618415>>1618433All I do when I come here is try to make you laugh
There's been farmers lately saying how all the fun anons are gone and it stings a bit because who are you calling boring bitch
No. 1618457
>>1618442Especially you
All your posts are obvious because you space them like this
And none of them are good posts
Im not a hater in fact I implore you, plead to you actually, to be better
But you wont and it's heartbreaking
No. 1618523
File: 1687837465944.jpeg (6.37 KB, 203x248, IMG_9219.jpeg)
I'm extremely horny and have a super high sex drive yet by bf doesn't care and would rather spend hours a day cooming to porn and onlyfans. It's not fair, why does he not want me. It is mentally ill to choose porn over real sex with a real woman. Why bother dating if you're going to do that? I think I'll just break up and kick him out
No. 1618535
>>1618510It was probably written by a man as bait or an insane NLOG going through psychosis just ignore that shit
>>1618523Have self respect and leave him with his porn. Wtf is this relationship
No. 1618546
>>1618442>>1618520>>1618487You know what?
All the fun anons are gone now
You don't deserve me
No. 1618548
>>1618546I thought you wrote a haiku.
Baited.
No. 1618587
File: 1687849395131.jpg (43.45 KB, 600x427, daz6i2v-7972475f-e774-46e6-b9f…)
Fuck I got catfished super hard from Tinder and now this guy is plunking at my hotel room and won't fucking leave.
>got me by posting band pics of himself, admitted they were from 15-20 years ago so the 2000s
>got me by sending "freshly showered" pics that clearly were from a time when he was tanned, buff, and younger too
>shows up overweight, pastey, making advances, smells like crotch despite "showering"
>claims he was a touring drummer for p!atd and paramore which is bullshit
>entertain his ass because he is being entertaining, showing me places where I wanted to go, and clearly does possess people charisma
>after night out we go back to my hotel to fuck (can feel a sizable dick thru pants)
>he unzips
>his dick reeks and he has a peeling 'bite' mark from what he claims was from his last bj
>politely reject him
Now he is sleeping in my room when all I wanted to do was eat and go to bed. I fell for it. Ugh. He needs to get an Uber up on outta here.
No. 1618638
>>1618538Never heard of this sub now I gotta go pour over it and investigate. I can’t believe how prevalent porn is. My bestie’s husband watches porn and she’s totally okay with it because apparently her not being in the mood “isn’t fair to him” and “guys need variety” bitch what. And she has a daughter with this man. Tbf he treats her well otherwise and I have nothing else bad to say about him, he’s completely non
abusive and never even raises his voice at my friend or their daughter, and he works hard so she can be a SAHM. But damn. It’s just so disrespectful to me, like even if she is fine with it I’m offended on her and her daughter’s behalf.
No. 1618657
File: 1687859192436.png (2.38 MB, 828x1792, 736D2453-96E6-4ACC-9C07-AE21E8…)
I hate it when I type something in wrong and get recommended the weirdest shit. I don’t even remember what I was looking up but this garbage showed up kek
No. 1618659
>>1618657I remember now, I was looking for a cool video I saw before on a village in Africa that was run by women.
>>1618658I want to know too anon. It’s like that typing in “.” On YouTube Meme
No. 1618660
>>1618345Thanks for reply, anon. I was just pmsing hehe but it's a recurring problem that stems from anger/hate taboo in my family. I was basically taught to be forgiving and understanding no matter what and to see negative feelings as something bad, especially if they're directed at someone close to you. It fucked me up a little bit, still affects me to this day.
I don't think he was taught to manipulate but it's more like an integral part of him, it's just in his character. He only needs to
look as a decent person, if he manages to do something indecent in secret it doesn't count. And it's like he genuinely doesn't understand what's wrong with it if he tried to hide it in the first place. Kinda like, if you uncovered it, you're the one to blame, it's on you. If you've played by his rules, everything would've been great. That's really weird. The man lives in the kingdom of illusion, and I'd been trapped there for a long time as well. Yeah, as I said, there are some good things about him, but you're right, I started questioning a lot after I fully realized who he was, and it seems like part of that was just his adjusting his personality to mine because now that he's with someone else I can see that's what's he doing. Ah, fuck him.
No. 1618697
File: 1687865382869.gif (1.47 MB, 140x140, smoking.gif)
I signed up for a forum but I can't start using it or see any threads before a admin as approved my account. It was a week ago and I haven't heard anything from them yet. I don't even know if the forum is still active since you need an approved account to see anything on it. I used to lurk there years ago I have no idea what made them go private. They do have a facebook page which I think is active?(it's private too) but I don't want to use my facebook with my full name to post there. I just wanted a website where I can talk about my niche-hobbies with likeminded people without them knowing where I live and my fullname. I also don't want people I know IRL to know about my niche hobbies.
I could always make a fake facebook account just so I can use the facebook page but I don't want to switch between my real facebook account (I use it alot for university stuff) and a fake one that purely exist for one page only. Besides I just want to use a good old forum format. I'm not too familiar with facebook pages but I can't imagine it's easy to navigate old tutorials on them
No. 1618739
>>1618709I feel like it's mostly people like this anon's ex
>>1618722Although not necessarrily, but I feel like people that used to be overweight can be especially judgemental toward others. Their old insecurities don't let them chill, they want to feel superior and remind others about their successes in this field so to say. They're also probably annoyed when someone is overweight but doesn't seem bothered, because they couldn't allow themselves not to be bothered. Something like that. And surely there're people that never were overweight but still are obsessed with diets, working out and so on, they might be not judgemental to others but still annoying, and all this shit is just ALWAYS on their mind. They're more likely to notice if their friends or relatives put on even a little bit of weight and make remarks about the food they choose to it. I also absolutely hate these constant "let's not eat this much cake or we'll get gargantuan butts", "teehee I ate so much cake (one piece) I'm gonna walk 30 km home now to get rid of all that" and so on, like you're literally committing a sin if it's not a raw carrot but something sweeter. RELAX omg
No. 1618776
There has to be something wrong with me, I get so fucking annoyed when people around me are like "let's go drink, no it's ok you have laundry to do and you should cook! let's just eat fast food and I have a ton of laundry to do too it's cool!" bitch, no! I hate that shit, I've done so much fucking work to have my little routine, I have lost so much weight and I am not gonna eat shit just because you wanna be messy. Maybe I'm just autistic or something but no one I know doesn't seem to understand that there is a reason they are always "so tired, so behind on chores, bloated and gaining weight" like yeah, some of us actually focus so they are on top of shit. It annoys me way more because they seem to think that I enjoy being a buzzkill but I rather have a clean apartment, no hangover, don't feel gross and have actually clean clothes and dishes instead of constantly sabotaging myself, we are almost 30, fucking get a grip.
No. 1618782
>>1618781Where were you failing, exams or assignments? Might help to figure out what your strengths are.
But you can get into so many industries via agencies or start off doing clerical/administrative shit in an office and work your way up.
No. 1618804
damn,so almost everyone uses a filter nowadays
there's this girl I follow on insta and I noticed her filter glitching and showing that she, indeed, has texture and lines like the rest of us humans, feels refreshing. then i looked again at all her shorts and noticed how heavily filtered they are
she's already gorgeous, it's really weird when flawless people like that do it
my inner teenager does REEEE a bit at all those girls/women who never had a zit in their life tho
and it's weird to see so many young girls wear foundation (especially caked up one)when their skin is literally a blank piece of paper: smooth, no texture, no redness
I guess what I'm really upset at is all this marketing and shit that puts it into young girls brain that they NEED to wear this and that to feel secure, it's like they're being brainwashed
when I was 14 I was worried about good grades, not buying the latest makeup products, I know beauty is important but man, social media and marketing make it seem like it's all that matters
sigh
No. 1618818
>>1618590>>1618594>>1618613I'm fine btw.
He did wind up sleeping but I had to kick him out to go to work early anyway. I had to drive his dumb ass back to his place, and I guess I did it to not cause a scene and secondly because I could tell this guy was pretty crestfallen from me rejecting him. Wish he could have ordered an Uber but I don't think we are in a reliable area for it and he seemed like a tightass with money. Maybe broke.
He was overapologizing and asked over text if I was annoyed with him and if I'd wanna hang again. I will just ghost. I can get a more attractive man with an actual clean dick.
Would've been fine with this dude if he didn't fucking REEK. Like catfishing with his younger pictures aside, it's not like he was unattractive altogether, just not what he advertised and kinda had an ego that I was happy to knock down a peg. Also glad I had the self-respect to say no. Back in my pickme days I did tolerate sex with a guy with an equally stinky cock and gave myself my first and only bacterial vaginosis infection. Men are clueless.
Oh well. Time to re-pick from my thousands of Tinder matches~
No. 1618819
>>1618590>>1618594>>1618613I'm fine btw.
He did wind up sleeping but I had to kick him out to go to work early anyway. I had to drive his dumb ass back to his place, and I guess I did it to not cause a scene and secondly because I could tell this guy was pretty crestfallen from me rejecting him. Wish he could have ordered an Uber but I don't think we are in a reliable area for it and he seemed like a tightass with money. Maybe broke.
He was overapologizing and asked over text if I was annoyed with him and if I'd wanna hang again. I will just ghost. I can get a more attractive man with an actual clean dick.
Would've been fine with this dude if he didn't fucking REEK. Like catfishing with his younger pictures aside, it's not like he was unattractive altogether, just not what he advertised and kinda had an ego that I was happy to knock down a peg. Also glad I had the self-respect to say no. Back in my pickme days I did tolerate sex with a guy with an equally stinky cock and gave myself my first and only bacterial vaginosis infection. Men are clueless.
Oh well. Time to re-pick from my thousands of Tinder matches~
No. 1618869
>>1618781Depends, do you have money? There are tons of industries. Are you poor? Gonna be rough
All of these require some certification or training, at least some experience but the amount of schooling and exams needed varies where you are and what level of people you work with, and they offer training for those hired for others, but none of them require a university degree
esthetician
masseuse
housekeeping
barista
chef
pâtissier
stylist
realtor
flight attendant
developer
nanny
assistant
house manager
animal caretaker
pilot*
*It's only possible if you have good health, financially well off to afford it, plenty of time to study, and good with physics and related topics, so it's less attainable than the others but regardless one could start school right out of high school and be a pilot by mid 20s, but many commercial pilots accumulate flight hours to get good jobs and are older
No. 1618902
>>1618893> I could be a streamerLmao
I’m sorry is this a compliment nowadays?
No. 1618943
File: 1687892473338.jpg (125.31 KB, 850x850, cig.jpg)
i feel like i'm going to reach rock bottom. don't even know who i am anymore, i crave contact but nobody wants to approach me. huh, still i'm glad that i hadn't self harmed myself yet and i had enough with alcohol. its the most boring spiraling into depression ever.
No. 1618949
File: 1687892962218.jpeg (52.11 KB, 702x355, C5211279-723A-472D-AFF1-6B7DF4…)
I absolutely hate youtube prank channels, there’s nothing lighthearted about them. The scrotes always harass “Karen’s” (aka women with boundaries), retail employees or elderly people. And all of the women are pick me’s running around to talk sexually to every single man or yell at other women that feminism is stupid. They record random people to the brink of breakdowns! It’s like you literally can’t go into a public space without fear of someone with the iq of overcooked pasta shoving a microphone in your face
No. 1618958
File: 1687893679934.png (28.67 KB, 654x635, Screenshot 2023-06-27 at 20-16…)
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-12237475/Who-controversial-director-Nicolas-Winding-Refn.htmlThis makes me so angry. Take a classic well loved children's series, originally written by a woman, and which was known for teaching values like courage,imagination, respect, camaraderie, loyalty etc, and were really cool adventure stories and place it in the hands of a degenerate scrote. It will probably end up like The Idol crossed with Scooby Doo.
No. 1619057
File: 1687905385150.jpeg (85.73 KB, 585x873, F00C286B-7A0D-4EA7-90DE-2791AD…)
>>1619045Try tomboy chic, or goth chic
No. 1619088
>>1619082I'm not a certified autist but I have some traits and since me being
weird always put me in bad situations, for my current nigel I made it clear right away that I need my time to fuck off or at least to be lost in my mind. He said he was gonna be fine with it because he's also the type to do his stuff so I think it's mutual and I lucked out
No. 1619181
File: 1687916301221.jpeg (5.19 KB, 225x225, download (4).jpeg)
I'm so fucking scared about the effects of all these climate tipping points being tipped at the same time plus the worst EL Nino to date happening right now.
Shit barely started but the oceans are already boiling and woods are burning. Why did I have to be born in the middle of a climate collapse, I hate it so much I just want to make a comfy life and be able to know that the world will still be livable in 30 years ahhhhhhhhhh
No. 1619214
File: 1687921087644.jpg (7.56 KB, 282x178, images.jpg)
FB just recommended a guy who groomed me online when I was a teenager. And I was having such a good week.
I made the mistake of using my old, junk email for FB which I guess was the one I used to talk to him. I didn't even realize.
No. 1619221
File: 1687921950524.jpg (19.09 KB, 303x343, sadcathug.jpg)
>>1619218I'm so sorry
nonnie No. 1619228
File: 1687923738993.jpeg (68.58 KB, 640x853, 1C1CD029-A123-495A-9DAE-F717F4…)
I need help, like serious help.
These small bumps broke out ALL over my body, like everywhere. My neck, my chest, my arms, my thighs, my back, my breasts, everywhere except my face (lol)
I cannot figure out the life of me what it is. Google's been useless and it doesn't help having dark skin.
They are just kinda itchy, but there are so many on my chest alone that you could probably read the whole dictionary in braille.
No. 1619234
>>1619229My doctor is only available on Thursday, it's currently 10 minutes to Wednesday. Where I live, you need to be referred to a specialist by your doc.
I'm going to see a pharmacist in morning, I just want to know what the fuck is up with this random break from nothing..
No. 1619240
>>1619177Thanks nonniekins
I had explosive diarrhea and vomitting on Friday night last week. Today I ordered something from some shady Donair place nearby because I didn't have much to prepare my own food. The place looked kinda dirty and the owner was smoking cigarettes outside when I arrived and it didn't even seem like he washed his hands when he came back in to prepare my food. He was wearing nitrile gloves while preparing my food but it seems like he had been wearing that all day. This was my 2nd time at this restaurant, both mediocre experiences, and I will NOT be going again anymore.
No. 1619242
File: 1687924498301.jpeg (60.81 KB, 1089x585, 8B3598BA-2175-4573-9EBD-181B8C…)
>>1619228Sounds like fungal acne aka Malassezia. It’s caused malassezia yeast. It’s frequently seen in people who live in hot humid environments, and in people who have recently taken antibiotics. It can present in many different ways so google images will be your friend, when I get it it starts on my chest and gradually radiates upwards on my neck and face and onto my arms. It sucks. I have to take a week of oral antifungal medications after anytime I have to take antibiotics.
There are some otc home remedies but really if you can convince a doctor to give you a week of oral fluconazole that’s your best bet. Even dermatologists act like retards about malassezia for some reason. I had to play doctor for myself and basically just tell an urgent care doctor that I need the fluconazole for a week and they just gave it to me. It’s rough on your liver though, definitely recommend taking NAC or milk thistle supplements while you’re on the antifungal and for a while after, and no alcohol.
No. 1619252
>>1619236Nothing changed, which is so odd. I use the baby unscented detergent because of allergies, now this is different! I didn't eat anything I'm not allergic to, nor anything new.
I'm sorry for the gross photo, but here. This before it flared up AGAIN.
Deleted photo and reuploaded because I think
>>1619242 got it right.
This seems to be it, I have never experienced this before, and I haven't been on antibiotics is over a year, I was outside though on a hot day for 4 hours so maybe that could be it?
I'm so unlucky, I've gotten shingles last year summer now this!!
No. 1619270
>>1619230I relate to this. One of my favourite YouTuber was vaguely in support of trans "women" and the Dildo budlight controversy. Also just today my workplace did an LGBT pride month presentation. It was voluntary to attend but when I took a look at the chat they mentioned about gender neutral bathrooms. These didn't make me lose respect for them but it really feels like you're the insane one when you see even normies supporting these
abusive men.
No. 1619295
>>1619082I had to tell him because he kept trying to introduce me to his massive group of friends and got upset when I didn't immediately become besties with them or want to hang out in such a big group of virtual strangers. They also didn't ask me many questions and just expected me to lead the conversation on top of everything.
We're fine now but I had to explain to him that I don't work that way and need lots of alone time to wind down. He luckily understood and was very patient with me.
No. 1619305
>>1619278You may not have necessarily misread the relationship, maybe she doesn't feel comfortable talking on VC? It doesn't have to mean she likes you less than you thought, it may just be the usual "phonecall anxiety" adjacent thing. I'd know because I have it, and get nervous pretty much every time I play games on voice chat, even if it's someone I know from real life for years lmao
I guess what I want to say is to not assume the worst, there could be plenty of other reasons (than not liking you enough) she didn't eagerly jump into VC offer
No. 1619360
File: 1687940140923.jpg (14.55 KB, 275x263, 1612774112236.jpg)
I'm so tired of working retail but I can't go back to school for financial reasons and I don't know what else to do. The job isn't even that hard and not terribly stressful, it's just fucking embarrassing working retail full-time at 26. I live with my parents too which makes me want to scrape my brains out because I hate being around them, but living with random roommates sounds like hell and I can't afford to live on my own. I hate that I was retarded, anxious, and depressed for my teens and early 20s, I could have turned out so much better.
No. 1619383
>>1619377If I had to estimate I probably owe around 4 or 5k.
>merchandisersThat would probably be a good step forward for me actually.
>>1619378I have my uni portal login but I can't even get unofficial transcripts. I'll make note of your other methods though.
>>1619379This might be less of a headache than making a phone call at this point.
No. 1619390
File: 1687943901281.jpeg (80.27 KB, 750x748, 9CC93523-863D-40D1-A4A8-28B411…)
My dad may have cancer again. Freaking out. May out right means he has cancer with the type of cancer he had. I want to leave so bad but now I feel awful. I need out of my living situation ASAP. They want me out of the way but it will change now cuz they will want me to take care of him when he needs it. I took care of my gramma with no help or thank you. I can’t watch another person die. Sorry. I have to leave. I have to leave. I don’t know what to do anymore. Move to Sweden? With very little money and the fact I am a disabled piece of shit who will be more of a burden. Wait for a tard apartment like I have been and end up alone for hours + days on end with no Real human contact at all. I just wish I was dead. I am tired of being sick. I am tired of being in pain. I am tired of being born into this cluster fuck of a family cuz my dad is an idiot who paid to get my whore mom’s tubes untied like I was going to save their relationship when now they both give little fucks about me cuz I didn’t along with the fact I am a retard with health issues. I give up. No one here cares. The people who care can’t help me. I have been isolated as fuck my whole life and told I will never do anything or be anything so I have very little concept of independence or any real way to gain it. Fuck. I am sorry. No one cares let alone a imageboard
No. 1619447
File: 1687950672001.jpeg (15.32 KB, 275x275, 1681190460793.jpeg)
Every time I have an appointment with a cute physiotherapist my brain goes BRRRRRRR. That's the only male touch I had in my life. This one physio I'm seeing now is really cute, a little older than me and I think he might find me attractive, I need to stop being so autistic and bad at smalltalk though, like when he was asking me about the school I was going to I could give only one or two word reply kek. I'm going to work abroad and I will see him again 3 months from now ughhhh. When a guy giggles at your jokes and looks in your eyes and smiles it means he at least doesn't find you repulsive right??? How do I initiate a more private conversation without seeming weird? Please give me some tips I need to prepare for this
No. 1619471
>>1619462Like casual questions? Are you from here? Do you like to read/watch/whatever? If so suggest something you liked reading/watching/whatever recently. Do you know anything about him? If he asks you something try asking him the same. Even the weather can be a conversation starter. If he replies with short answers it's not your fault, the other person needs to want to continue the convo too, don't freak out or blame yourself, sometimes people are shy (like you) and sometimes they don't feel like talking. Sorry if this wasn't helpful
nonnie, I am wishing you luck.
No. 1619484
File: 1687954742156.jpg (36.28 KB, 680x646, wrong.jpg)
Finally sobered up from drinking last night and I want to get drunk again. I feel like I'm finally at the end of my rope. Nothing is going well for me, my education/career is going down the shitter, and no one in my life actually cares about me. I just want to drink all day and die. I wish it were easier.
No. 1619551
File: 1687960896090.jpg (57.7 KB, 828x803, Tumblr_l_392281220941188.jpg)
I want to kill myself so fucking bad. I wish I could get out of this stupor where you are too much of an amoeba to even off yourself. I've been staring at my dirty floor for the past 10 minutes. My meds don't help me anymore and I can't even cry properly. If I can post on boards I should be able to do this too but fucking alas.
No. 1619555
File: 1687960975197.jpeg (9.49 KB, 189x266, IMG_0432.jpeg)
I’m taking a long haul bus (22hrs total) and my anxiety is starting to go absolutely crazy. Why couldn’t I be as cool about it as I was in April when I booked it, and why couldn’t I be as freaked out about it then as I am now so that I’d find another way. It’s not even the travel time, it’s the guarantee that I’ll actually arrive at my destination. Pray for me nonnas. This whole trip is turning into a disaster and I need this bus trip to go well.
No. 1619566
Angry at myself for getting fat. I was thin and athletic my entire life, then moved to a shitty, crime-ridden, hot, polluted, pedestrian-unfriendly town (so there’s nowhere for me to walk anymore), lost my job during the pandemic, stress-ate and stress-drank, got on antidepressants and I fucking ballooned up. I’m so mad that I let myself get fat, it’s ruined every aspect of my life. I never want to have sex anymore, and I’ve actively avoided seeing old friends because I feel so embarrassed.